Nowadays, I am trying out things to find my forever hobby. I made mead and it turned out pretty good for a first timer in my opinion.
I am so excited bcs summer is almost here and i can finally go to garage sales. I LOVE Garage Sales and Thrift Shops because you never know what you can find. If you do as well, please send me your best find.
I have also decided that I want to learn Latin so if anyone speaks Latin, i'd appreciate any advice.
So my interests are:
I love metal, rock, house kinda music
I also love anime, movies, and shitty reality tv shows
I love isekai genre animes or anything with magic/fantasy
Just recently started reading manga&manhwa
I watched couple of shitty reality shows as well
Like Kitchen Nightmares, 90 day fiance, my 600lbs life, extreme cheapskates etc.
I also love Harry Potter, Fantastic Beasts, Star Wars (recently started).
I have weird curiosities like how do wizards make money in Harry Potter?
I also love photography as in, i basically take pics of anything.
Fun fact about me, i'm obsessed with skulls. I just love skull rings and other things. (Not human or animal skulls)
I live in EST time zone so similar time zones would be better.
Please send a chat request with introducing yourself a little

Nowadays, I am trying out things to find my forever hobby. I made mead and it turned out pretty good for a first timer in my opinion.
I am so excited bcs summer is almost here and i can finally go to garage sales. I LOVE Garage Sales and Thrift Shops because you never know what you can find. If you do as well, please send me your best find.
I have also decided that I want to learn Latin so if anyone speaks Latin, i'd appreciate any advice.
So my interests are:
I love metal, rock, house kinda music
I also love anime, movies, and shitty reality tv shows
I love isekai genre animes or anything with magic/fantasy
Just recently started reading manga&manhwa
I watched couple of shitty reality shows as well
Like Kitchen Nightmares, 90 day fiance, my 600lbs life, extreme cheapskates etc.
I also love Harry Potter, Fantastic Beasts, Star Wars (recently started).
I have weird curiosities like how do wizards make money in Harry Potter?
I also love photography as in, i basically take pics of anything.
Fun fact about me, i'm obsessed with skulls. I just love skull rings and other things. (Not human or animal skulls)
I live in EST time zone so similar time zones would be better.
Please send a chat request with introducing yourself a little

Nowadays, I am trying out things to find my forever hobby. I made mead and it turned out pretty good for a first timer in my opinion.
I am so excited bcs summer is almost here and i can finally go to garage sales. I LOVE Garage Sales and Thrift Shops because you never know what you can find. If you do as well, please send me your best find.
I have also decided that I want to learn Latin so if anyone speaks Latin, i'd appreciate any advice.
So my interests are:
I love metal, rock, house kinda music
I also love anime, movies, and shitty reality tv shows
I love isekai genre animes or anything with magic/fantasy
Just recently started reading manga&manhwa
I watched couple of shitty reality shows as well
Like Kitchen Nightmares, 90 day fiance, my 600lbs life, extreme cheapskates etc.
I also love Harry Potter, Fantastic Beasts, Star Wars (recently started).
I have weird curiosities like how do wizards make money in Harry Potter?
I also love photography as in, i basically take pics of anything.
Fun fact about me, i'm obsessed with skulls. I just love skull rings and other things. (Not human or animal skulls)
I live in EST time zone so similar time zones would be better.
Please send a chat request with introducing yourself a little

Ooo gotta keep this one vague, Matched with this lovely lady and we click instantly, she says on her profile she’s looking for long term relationship etc My profile is geared towards that anyway Get talking and we really hit it off Ask for a first date after a week or so of talking and, not being one to commit to an expensive restaurant, I suggest a few drinks by the river and go to an open mic night if all goes well So few drinks easy convo, going great so off to the music venue and some great artists some decent dancing (I was surprised how good she was tbh!) Lovely night quick peck and make sure she gets home ok 2nd date, similar vibe and I ask how come you’re so good at dancing Get the story that she’s an award winning dancer through university/ college all cool, and say yeah I thought you’re much better than average (I’m below average as a male at best but can match tempo lol) Things get abit heavy through messaging etc about being exclusive etc, and tbh I wouldn’t mind as she is stunning (Talks about wanting breast reduction surgery etc) These are all very cost effective dates btw Anyway she’s making her feelings very clear about wanting a full on relationship which I’m happy to give her tbf After the second date she brings up being bi, and how I would be the only one etc, something I was fine for her to continue to pursue (obviously!) But pick her up from the airport and all the lovey doves stuff but she brings up naked dance clubs on the way back I asked if she meant swingers clubs but she insisted not So it’s starting to look a certain way and either I’m the luckiest guy in the world (un-likely) or it’s something else For context I am quite an interesting individual with frequent travel and handy guy to know Whatcha think

Looking to buy a Japanese pick up truck mid-size class my eyes and Heart love the Taco..... which year would be the best.... I also like the nissan Frontier but don't know enough about it (just going off looks for that one)
but I know anything Japanese lasts forever.

Be Anarion, a neutral evil genie warlock.
Mfw my genie is imprisoned in a ring by the god of fire and most of her power is stolen.
I love my genie (maybe a bit too much) and will do anything to free her.
Another party member named Sa becomes best friends with an NPC, the NPC is a cleric or Eros, the goddess of darkness.
He also begins supporting the goddess.
Another member, named Nox joins us at level 5. He's from the Shadowfell, Eros' Domain.
Mfw when we randomly get attacked by some evil shadowfell guys and barely survive.
Turns out Nox stole an item from the BBEG of shadowfell, an item that can kill Eros.
Sa berates Nox for not telling us and thinks of giving the item to the BBEG so we're safe.
Mfw I realize this item can kill Eros... a goddess, maybe it can kill other gods... or demi gods...
Refuse to give back item. We decide to counter attack as soon as possible to try and take them by surprise.
Persuade Sa and Nox to keep the item safe inside my ring. Sa tells me to not give it to the enemy even if things turn deadly. I may have fleed from a previous combat encounter and left the party behind... oops
DM rolls a 97 out of 100 on a roll to determine what kind of info we get from our sources. We learn where the BBEG's Boss is.
We roll up to his crib and kill him since he's weakened because he was recently resurrected.
I choose to loot his crib.
Mfw I randomly pick the correct window and succeed on a 5% chance roll on a d100.
Turns out this crib is someone else's. I meet an incredible powerful mage.
Ask to use his library, I'm secretly looking for info on how to use this item to kill a demi god.
He decides to start small talk with me, DM takes me to a private channel.
Mfw I roll a nat 20 on insight.
Mfw he hates Eros because he's basically the Invoker from DOTA, but I can choose to not help him and he won't hurt me or steal the item from me.
We sign an unbreakable vow, like Harry Potter.
I give him the god killing item. He uses it to kill Eros and then discards the godlike power from his body.
The vow specified that he has to find info on how we can kill the demi god and he must help me in the final fight against him.
I request a fake replica of the item to have the option to lie to everyone about using it.
Both the original item and the replica are identifyproof. However a powerful enough mage could tell this is a mere fake.
Party doesn't know any of this. I'm not sure what effect Eros' death will have on the world.
Next session is either confession time or my gaslighting era.

I read the books a while back and couldn't remember them clearly. Recently in this sub I'd read about how a lot of people can't stand how angry Colin is in the books, and I couldn't remember him being angry. So I re-read the book.
Yes he does get angry a lot throughout the book, but to me it seems like a reasonable reaction (for the most part) to whatever is happening, and Penelope gives as much as she gets. She throws it back at him when he goes at her. It's part of what makes their relationship progress imo.
Anyway, just wanted to say I understand why he gets angry throughout the book, and I don't think it's unjustified. I also think she is a great match for him. I'm enjoying my second reading just as much as my first. I love this couple and their story. Friends to lovers are the best.

Hi so I feel like a lot of the discourse about people not liking this season is also in part people not really understanding what friends to lovers is, specifically the relationship between Colin and Penelope, so I thought I might share my thoughts :)
Now I haven’t read the books - this is all based on what I gleaned from the show on multiple rewatches and as someone who has been the Penelope in a friendship for a longggg long time. Hopefully this makes sense.
Romance tropes are so often boiled down to their immediate, basic truths. The popular enemies to lovers, for example: Enemy 1 + Enemy 2 + sexual tension = Lover 1 and Lover 2. Not to say enemies to lovers can’t be complex, but generally the starting point for enemies is an essential lack of trust between the parties and moments of connection (via fights) fueled by intense feelings of hatred/rage/whatever which can, in turn, translate to sexual tension. Due to the lack of trust, when they do get together it’s an explosion of that intense energy, highlighted even more-so by the knowledge that they don’t truly trust each other but they need each other which makes the heart race all the more and the passion all that more explosive.
Let’s look at Kate and Anthony as this trope. When they meet there is an immediate spark, fueled by a race in which they’re in competition. Once she hears him at the ball she decides she will do everything in her power to stop him from marrying her sister, and since he is determined to marry Edwina every interaction they have from that point on, until they have their happily ever after in the last episode, can be considered a fight. Moments like the bane of my existence and you vex me are such high intensity because it’s two people fueled by anger and sexual/romantic tension. They need each other like air but will do everything to fight it because of the anger, making the onscreen affections super intense for the viewer (especially as viewers who have just been introduced to Kate and are getting to know her through the lens of Anthony).
Now friends to lovers is, if I may say, quite a bit more complicated. All friendships are different - if you’re new friends your pipeline to lovers is likely entirely different to old friends to lovers. If one party is in love with the other that changes the dynamic entirely; are they long distance or close? Were they childhood friends? Are they both likeable and popular or is one more nerdy and quiet or both? All of these and more create new dynamics and emotions that can lead to love in different ways. My point is that friends to lovers is not as easy to pin down as something like enemies to lovers. So that’s why a couple like Polin may seem like they don’t have as much chemistry on screen - because their intensity shines in a different way than what we’re used to.
Going into season three we know that Penelope has been in love with Colin for a long time, but during that time the two also formed a close friendship. When Colin proposed to Marina, yes Penelope whistledowned about the pregnancy to stop him from marrying her for love reasons, but also because he is her friend and she didn’t want to see him trapped in a loveless marriage. We also know that when Colin traveled between seasons one and two Penelope most often responded to his letters. Even during a scene in season two Pen specifically asks to hear more about his travels, even though everyone else in Colin’s life had asked him to stop talking about it. Pen’s crush and friendship don’t cancel each other out, they exist side by side as two parts of Penelope that often overlap but are most importantly separate entities. And she knows that.
Colin does not. In season three when Colin is talking about when they first met, Penelope looks away with anxiety when Colin suggests he knows why Penelope was so forward in making fun of him for falling off his horse and starting their friendship. She knows it’s because she had a crush on him. He states that it was because they were kids. This means it’s canon that Penelope had a crush on him since the moment they met. As a result, Colin has never experienced a friendship with Pen that doesn’t also have an underlying crush. He doesn’t know that Pen doesn’t respond to everyone’s letters all the time, or hangs onto their every word, or goes out of her way to talk to them. How Pen acts around him is how he assumes she acts around everyone - that’s why he doesn’t pick up on her crush.
It’s also why, I argue, he doesn’t realize that he loves her until the kiss in season three. He truly and genuinely takes her affections, her friendship, for granted because he doesn’t understand that someone so loyal and loving like that is rare. He doesn’t appear to have much else in the way of friends; outside of his family we don’t really see him interact with other men, and in season three the “friends” he does spend time with make comments to suggest they only started hanging out with him after his personality change to be more like his brothers - a rake who doesn’t care much for real affections. It’s why he said he would never court Penelope Featherington, or why he said “You are Pen, you do not count” when asked why he was still talking to her if he swore off women. He was super young when his dad died, so the only male role models he has for what love means are Anthony and Benedict. So, as he understands it, a man courting a woman is about sleeping around until the man finds a suitable match that pleases the family regardless of the man’s happiness. Even though he saw that Anthony fell in love by the time Colin said he would never court Pen, he didn’t see Anthony’s journey to understanding that love is not something to run from but something to cherish like we, the viewers, did. Anthony’s arc was just background noise for Colin, so it wasn’t like that would change his outlook on what Anthony’s actions in season one and beginning of season two loudly called out: choosing love over meaningless sex is idiotic and weak. Colin is genuinely distressed when Penelope walks away from him at the garden party in the first episode of season three, and he went after her to explain that he missed her when she stopped writing to him on his travels. He loves his relationship with her, not understanding that what he feels is actually love for her because he has never been aware that true love feels the way it does when he is with Pen. In fact it is explained in a letter that the reason he decided to try being like his brothers is BECAUSE Penelope stopped responding to him during his travels between seasons two and three. He decided to start guarding his heart, throwing on the rakish armor we see him dawn in the first half of season three, because he didn’t have that relationship that made him feel stable and loved anymore. He sees Penelope as his best friendship, rather than the love of his life, because he literally can’t see it any other way based on how everything in his life played out to that point.
Okay this is way longer than I intended this to be already, but to finally make it to my main point! The Friends to Lovers trope as it plays out in Season Three Part One: Polin do be polining.
What does all this mean for how Polin’s intensity shines? Due to the way their friendship has played out things like Colin taking Pen to the dance floor (not small social feat btw) in season one when Cressida bullies her, seeking each other out at social events, Pen asking about his travels - all of these are part of their romance! It’s all part of the slow burn; it’s just less slap-you-in-the-face noticeable, to a viewer of a show about romance, as Kate and Anthony and even Simon and Daphne because acting like friends is an implicit part of Polin’s love story. Because they are best friends as well as lovers!!
This is in full display in Season three, though put more on blast since it’s their season to get together. Colin saying he’ll teach Penelope how to get a husband isn’t a pity thing, it’s a real moment of genuine care that Colin is extending towards her.
“Pen wants to get a husband to be happy? Great! I’ll help her get a husband to make her happy because her happiness means everything to me.” - top ten photos taken ten seconds before disaster.
And it works! They start spending all this time together, and Pen has always looked gorgeous but is finally wearing clothes that she feels gorgeous in and you can see it in the way she acts, and suddenly Colin’s heart starts doing all these weird jumps around her like when she’s in the drawing room and when she wraps his hand because he has always loved her, so he doesn’t understand what these feelings that are coming up during these scenes are because they are not new feelings, just more intense ones of what he believes is pure friendship.
Penelope, during all of this, has had her brain decide to give up on Colin Bridgerton (even though her heart hasn’t). As someone who’s been there, being in unrequited love with your friend is brutal but you can never really let go. No matter how many people they date, or the hours you spend together talking about their new crush, or the life moments share together where they do everything but love you there is always that small spark of hope in your chest that you can’t let go of lest they ever possibly realize they love you back. That chance is too precious to give up - that’s why Penelope can’t give Debling a real answer when he asks her if she would like to be with Colin in episode four. Logically she knows she should give it up but her heart just can’t. She is a hopeless romantic and her life has been spinning around Colin Bridgerton since she was 16 like the earth around the Sun. There is no other way to live, for her, if she isn’t in love with Colin. And that’s what breaks her heart the most.
It’s also why, I believe, she asks him to kiss her in that garden. She had just written about herself in Whistledown that she did the upmost embarrassing act of taking Colin’s assistance on the marriage market, and her mother dressed her down about being a spinster for the rest of her life. All of Pen’s plans, of marrying and getting out and even finding what could turn into love, are utterly gone for her in that moment when she goes out to the garden. She doesn’t have her prospects. She doesn’t have Eloise. She doesn’t have safety in her own home. The only thing she has left is Colin. That’s why she asks him to kiss her, because he might grant her this one kindness of making her feel alive for just this one moment before the rest of her life ends. That moment is the culmination of all of her feelings up to that point in the show. She’s given up on Colin - she wouldn’t have asked him to kiss her had she any hope left. This was her last ditch attempt to just be a girl and be kissed regardless of what he actually meant to her. It wasn’t out of desperation, it was staring down the barrel of the gun with societies’s finger on the trigger.
When she asks him Colin is taken aback. Not because he doesn’t want to kiss her but because he has never considered it before. Kissing was reserved for women you are looking to sleep with at a bar, for prostitutes in alleyways, not for his caring Pen. I’ve seen some upset over not including more of Colin’s writing in the show, as he becomes quite the writer in the books apparently, and the writing we do see is just about sex but given the way they paced the show they provided the most important piece of context for Colin’s understanding of intimacy in the writing they did use. He wonders how one can feel, despite sleeping with every kind of woman across Europe, such intimacy in physical closeness and yet such distance emotionally. It’s some level of satisfying for him to sleep around, but it doesn’t fulfill him in the way it seemed to fulfill his brothers. He cannot equate the idea of kissing to Penelope because he feels such emotional closeness to her. But when she brings it up, suddenly everything clicks into place for him. All the emotions he feels towards her, what he thought was just friendship, is so much more. Yes she is his friend, but by god he wants to kiss his friend.
Their kiss is sweet, and soft. Unlike Daphne and Anthony’s first kisses with their respective partners it isn’t this immense clashing of bodies and teeth. It’s two friends who love each other finally meeting each other as sparks fly and shivers run down their spines.
Colin is left speechless, and confused. The kiss was amazing to him because he finally unlocked that part of him that made him realize he was in love with Penelope. The kiss was amazing to Penelope because she has been in love with him for so long, but it was also tinged with her own doubts and feelings of hopelessness. That’s why she runs away, and thanks him, because this was her last stand and he was just her friend helping her out as she believes.
But as always, a night of sleep helps clarify things. The next time Pen goes into society she is awkward but still well intentioned about getting a husband because that kiss was a long day’s worth of self pity followed by, in her terms, a moment of weakness. But it clarified things for her too. Now she can’t die without ever having been kissed, so that ultimatum she set up in her own mind was gone and everything seems much more manageable from that point on. Colin, as we know, is a wreck who is absolutely bamboozled at these feelings and we love to watch him flounder!!!
Now the tables have been turned. To those of who are think Penelope should have chosen Debling, this part is for you. This is when Debling really starts to court Penelope as she goes after him. She literally fights Cressida for him, because he seems like the most amenable husband for her to be able to continue Whistledown and be provided security. She isn’t looking for love in Debling because she already has love in Colin (love she believes will always remain unrequited, but that kiss can be a memory she cherishes for the rest of her life and that be that); she basically did was Anthony did at the beginning of season two. Find a suitable match that makes the most sense for her and leave love out of it. She likes Debling, for sure, and he’s a rly nice guy!! He cares about her in a way that a suitor might, and I’m certain had they gotten married he wouldn’t have been mean to her or anything. But she would’ve been lonely. As remembered she is a romantic, someone who craves the love she reads about in her romance books. She’s spent most of her conscious life in love - marrying Debling would stop that in its tracks. In his own words, Debling tells Pen that he could try to maybe love her but that it was far too unlikely to find any room in his heart her for over his passions (aroace Debling stand rise). He specifically mentions that he is choosing her to marry because she has her own passions, separate from his, that can keep her company while he is gone both physically and emotionally from her. She doesn’t realize this until it’s too late, when her focus on the chase is over, and Debling asks her mother for her hand. It’s only then that she thinks that maybe she could hold out for love, and that power is strong enough to make her actively not want to ensure her security through Debling.
Love is treacherous, and yet we yearn for it like a sailor who cannot help but smile at the beauty of the raging sea at it comes crashing down upon him. Penelope would rather a thousand lifetimes of the chance to be in love with Colin over one lifetime married to Debling in safety.
That is why Debling breaks it off with her. Because she loves Colin, Debling knows she would choose Colin over him, and he sees Colin’s interest in her even if she does not. Like Colin literally found out she was going to get engaged, ran to the ball, interrupted the dance wherein Debling was going to ask Pen to marry him, ran after her carriage just to know if she was engaged because he couldn’t fathom letting her get away in a loveless marriage, and when finding out she was not engaged telling her he loved her even if she did not love him back because he simply had to express to her how much he loved her as he owed her that as his friend. Colin got in his knees in that carriage because he was genuinely splaying out his heart to her for her to dissect as she chose. He put himself at her mercy because that is where he believes his place to be - just hers, and no one else’s.
TO CONCLUDE: The carriage scene is, of course, the moment of highest intensity from the viewer standpoint of what we think love should appear to be. Other scenes could be Colin’s dream, and the moment in the sweets tent, etc. But those moments aren’t all of Polin’s love story. They may be the most visceral to witness, but they are just as important as the two of them laughing together in the corner of a ball. Their romantic trope is defined as Friends to Lovers, but that isn’t quite right - they are both. There is no big “or” between the two. Colin and Penelope are friends and lovers, and all of it is a beauty to witness.
And that’s all! If you’ve made it this far thanks for sticking around to listen to my obsessive thoughts. I wish you a very happy Bridgerton rewatch :)

My girlfriend of years and I broke up in the last month. We lived together so the breakup involved me moving out (B/U was my decision). We agreed no contact and all that originally but it’s been iffy. Now here’s where I’m at…
Originally the break up was on amicable, we still loved each other we were just in such different places mentally and needed time to work on ourselves. We said we’d take time and see where we’re at in a few months & see if we want to get back together. I personally have never been thru a breakup that has affected me like this. I loved (still do) her so much and really did plan on spending the rest of my life with her & had hope we could maybe get back together.
Since no contact, she called me the other night breaking down about some PTSD stuff, mentioned that i’m still her safe person etc and asked me to come over. I went (i still care about her deeply & am not the best at keeping boundaries). While I was there I found out that not only had she been flaked on by a new person that same night, but that they had been talking since before I had even moved out. My move out process took about a week post break up.
I am so extremely hurt by this as I had wanted to fr marry this girl (and thought she had too) but I just cant understand how she was able to talk to someone sexually/romantically within a week of us breaking up if that were true. I know everyone copes differently but a month in and I can’t even think about being or even talking with another girl in any way yet.
I don’t know what my goal is in terms of responses from yall but I guess just if anyone has had any similar experiences and how that played out it could help give me any clarity at all. Thanks.

Edit for info: i am 21 he his 23, met in 2021, been dating for a year. Fwb before that.
I might sound a little unhinged, but i guess I’m wanting to know if I’m in the wrong for wanting to bring it up to talk about it.
This morning, my boyfriend got a barrage of voice memos from a friend he hadn’t talked to in a while. From my understanding she’s a lesbian, but she seemed to have just gone through a breakup.
He played them out loud, it was probably 5 solid minutes of her talking, saying she wants to make music with him, and go to a festival together this summer. She also called him handsome within a string of compliments and she said that she loves him. She’s a very hippie, rave, spiritual kind of person. My boyfriend is more on the fringe of that ideology, and so am I. So the statements of love seemed like a very “we’ve been friends for so long, we used to do shrooms and have those experiences together” thing. (My bf does not use psychedelics anymore)
He despises responding to people, he seems to feel like he has to perform when doing so. So he was dreading responding to her 5 minutes of manic ramblings. He probably wrote for a solid 20-30 minutes. He showed me the bulk of text, not close enough for me to read it. It was multiple paragraphs. He made a joke about how he tried to match her energy, and use the hippie vernacular from his past. I told him half-jokingly i want to hear it, initially because i was curious to hear his attempt at a spiritual vibe. He dismissed it and acted kind of weird, he mentioned he didn’t want me to hearead it because or her saying she loved him and him trying to match that energy.
I dropped it at that because deep down i trust him, we had problems years ago before we were exclusively dating and he has made incredible efforts to make it known that he is devoted to me. I have a lot of anxiety about it, and he knows that. He has told me every time he has communicated with exes usually a “hey, we were dicks to each other, no hard feelings cool bye” or a “stop contacting me” i also know he’s not physically doing anything wrong, we are together every weekend, and he texts me incredibly frequently, we also have each other’s location. He is a home body who will go out once a month with one of his best freinds and thats it. Even then he texts me cute little pictures of him or drunk shenanigans (usually videos of him climbing trees lol)
But now that im home, i feel like theres a reason he didnt want me to read the texts, i thought she was a lesbian but in her voice memo she said her partner, which is what my boyfriend calls me since im nonbinary, but i know from experience he was quite the man hoe when we met.
I keep imagining senarios where he had a thing with her and was being a little too comfortable in the texts, or since he put in a lot of effort to match her energy that it was some sort of proclimation about how amazing she is and “YES! We should totaly hang out, you beautiful being” when he doesnt really treat me with that kind of adoration.
I want to bring it up, that im anxious about it, and i feel like our relationship has been so incredibly open that this is out of character. We pick our noses in front of each other, we’ve talked about trauma we’ve never told anyone about before, he’s shit his pants in front of me, theres nothing too intence or embarrassing for us.
Why did he not want me to read it?
Sorry for grammaspelling/punctuation, my phone overheats when i type too long so its hard to edit.

When I was but a sprout of a potato I had a miserable teacher. We'll call her Mrs. B. I was in the first grade and around seven years old.
One day Mrs. B finishes up her lesson earlier than she anticipated and she needed to fill time until recess. So she hands out paper to each of us and instructs the class to draw a picture of the two people we love the best. Once we finish we have to have her check it off before we could go out to recess.
Context: My parents were never married and young when they had me. Recently, I had been trying to get them back together. In my little seven year old mind I thought this picture would be it. If I drew a picture that showed them how much I loved them they, in turn, would realize they love each other and we could be a family.
Excitedly, I get my chunky crayons out and proceed to draw and color as carefully as I can. It has to be perfect.
I wanted to put them in a field of flowers, but my flower skills were limited. Tulips and sunflowers. That was it and they were NOT good enough. Then I came up with the best idea. Heart. Shaped. Flowers. Pink and red ones. As many as I can fit. By the time I finished, recess had already started and I was the only one left in the classroom.
I sign my name on the back, put away my crayons, and walk up to get my smiley face stamp from Mrs. B. I'm so proud and cannot wait to show my picture to my mom and dad.
Mrs. B looks over my picture, turns to me and stone cold says, "there's no such thing as heart shaped flowers." She proceeds to rip my picture in half, right down the middle, and THROWS IT IN THE TRASH!! Mrs. B hands me a new piece of paper and says I can't go out to recess until I draw a new picture.
I am shocked. The kind of shock where you don't know what to say or do. I'm not even heartbroken yet. Meekly, I take the paper, sit at my desk and just stare at the blank paper.
Mind you, the only rule Mrs. B gave was to draw a picture of the two people we loved. No other requirements, no other instructions.
As I'm realizing that I didn't break any rules or do anything wrong I get pissed. It was like a fire was lit inside of me. This was completely unjustified and I was not about to allow that to happen.
I grab my black crayon and scribble a big black circle in the middle of the paper. I take out all of my anger scribbling as hard as I can. Making it as dark and angry as I felt.
Once I felt better, I calmly put my crayons away, walked over to Mrs. B's desk and SLAMMED that paper onto her desk. Before she has a chance to say anything I litterally skipped out the classroom door and down the hall to enjoy my recess.

Hi there, trigger warning verbal abuse and some violence. My (25F) husband (25M) has now had two instances of severe verbal abuse, the second time escalating to physical- in that there were threats of s*****e and he was going towards a weapon in the house, punching walls and throwing things. He did push me off of him but did not directly hit me.
The verbal abuse ranges from calling me every name in the book, cussing me, telling me if his attempt is successful that it will be my fault, he’s insulted my personality traits and interests, and all around belittled me. These episodes are hours long and he is fully screaming and raging the whole time- I just sort of disassociate.
Context: The first time, I disrespected a boundary of his to not discuss our relationship with friends. The second time, I got jealous and tried to talk to him about it, but he was drinking and all reason went out the window.
I have never called him out of his name or cussed him. I can be insecure and not always handle things the best, but I’ve been in therapy and learned the healthy communication techniques.
What effs me up is that he’s promising to change and go to therapy to not do it again. Recently, I told him calmly that it’s happened twice, and if it happened a third time (episodes of severe yelling and name calling), I would leave. He stayed calm but said that he would probably mess up and do it again, and he asked me to reconsider that boundary. He asked me to stay even if he messed up again, that his parents argued like this and sometimes you forgive for the people we love. But am I meant to continually forgive and forget beating me down and scaring me, and threatening me? Saying this feels like he’s giving up before he tries.
Is my boundary not justified? Would you tolerate episodic verbal abuse? The episodes are very severe, but otherwise he is an okay partner. We do have a major issue of him shifting blame to me when I bring up problems, which I have tried to address to no avail. Overall I feel defeated and disrespected. I feel like my entire life depends on this decision, like if I stay I will just have to tolerate his explosions from time to time. I’m having a hard time navigating this, and ultimately scared to stay and scared to leave.

I don’t remember much of the story lines of the books but the main character had two older sisters and a younger brother and they lived with just their dad. Their mum had left them not long after her little brother was born. She had two best friends, a girl from her school and a boy (possibly named Billy, but I could be pulling that name out of thin air?) who didn’t get on to start with but end up together. The main direction of the first few books is the fact she’s in love with her oldest sisters best friend (who’s a guy) but later on in the series the middle sister ends up with him. Also later on in the series her mum comes back and it turns out she had another child no one knew about and had left because of postnatal depression. I believe it’s a British book as it’s all set in England (London I believe because I’m sure they go to Camden market a lot). Thanks.

I never thought id be writing this but im at my wits end with my parents especially my mom. I grew up with very traditional immigrant asian parents and they’re very loving but also emotionally abuse. Both me and my brother have realized that my parents was very racist, judgmental, homophobic, and many other things from a young age but always chose to ignore it as they only said things never really implied it to us. Growing up I reluctantly did everything they wanted me to do and act as well. I thought If I just did what they wanted they’ll eventually stop nagging and give boundaries. I was wrong. As I grow older it just got worse and worse. My dad has a very conservative ideology but has a bit of boundaries and will let you be as he is aware that its not the end of world. Although growing up we had a very rough history and our relationship isn’t the best. I am slightly closer to my mom although she even worse. My mom constanly nags and has no boundaries for me or my brother. They’re harder on me as I am female and need to be presentable so that a man will want me and take care of me. I however do not always meets the standard that mother wants. I dont do anything bad and go to school like im suppose to. I recently got admitted to pharmacy school in buffalo and am leaving in august. My mom use to always nag me about my weight really badly calling me fat daily or that she wishes ill die cause im just a fat loser or that im lucky im in America because in Asia I would just be shamed. Recently she stop nagging as I been going to the gym. I thought that she would stop emotionally abusing me, but now shell just get upset over tiny things. I would be eating and having a conversation with her and shell just blow up because I dont want to tie my hair up. Shell say no man would a nasty smelly women. I have tried to live to all her expectation thinking it will get better but ive realized it doesnt. She stressing about every little thing and is so judgmental to everyone its sickening. Everyone who doesnt uphold to her standard are just trashy people and below her. She also treats her mil my grandma terrible to the point where my grandma refuses to ask my mom for almost anything and will wait for me to help her. My mother expects me to marry a nice chinese man with a respectable job and has been pushing me to find one since i got into grad school, however im not sure I want to do that. I realized I liked girls at a young and consider myself bisexual as of now. I would never be able to tell my parents this and am fine with marrying a man. However I am not fine with marrying what they expect as this is the person I have to live with for the of MY life. They’ve also push my brother to do this as well and he has said to stop, they’ll stop pushing it but will still talk about it. My brother moved out when he was in college and just avoids my parents. Im also a bit more childish and care free and my parents hate that part of me. I guess depressed every time I think or even talk about my parents. My mom believe her ideology is right and what she does is okay thats what everyone else does. I want to cut my parents off but I need them finically and would to have parents in my life. Im not sure if I can continue to stay at home or even make it through the summer.What should I do?
PSA: every time I talk back to my mom rather its calmly or in a heated moment she just says I think like American and am just being an idiot.

So obviously there’s more context to this. For starters, my friend has always been a “tough love, tell you how it is” kind of person. She’s very judgemental by nature and to a certain degree will look down on anyone who doesn’t make the same life decisions as her. She’ll tell you this herself, too. She just has high expectations for the people in her life.
We became friends in college and I was a dumb college sophomore learning the ways of life. We’re all idiots when we’re 19 year old college girls. She’s witnessed me go through some shit. I leaned on her a lot for guidance and i’m sure i was aggravating to deal with at the time. Ya know, when your friend keeps complaining about a guy then keeps going back to him… that kinda stuff. Whatever… I was a dumb kid. I don’t think she’s been able to see me any differently though.
I’m 26 now and pretty accomplished, and I have matured since college. I have a career, Im in a serious relationship, I have money in the bank and I have nice things. I also have a cat, i’ve had her about 3 years now. When my boyfriend moved in, he brought his cat too.
My cat has had her fair share of health problems and adventures. This time last year (May 2023) I spent the night at my bfs place (before he moved in), and my roommate at the time got drunk and left the door open overnight so my cat escaped. We found her after non stop searching for 2 and a half days, but it was an ordeal and she got hurt so it was a long recovery. She made a full recovery by the time my bf moved in in July 2023. (I promise this is all relevant info)
So fast forward to Dec 2023. My bf and I are toying around the idea of getting a 3rd cat. I’m not really all in because I know I couldn’t financially handle it, but it’s fun to think about. I bring it up casually with my friend, and she advises against it, because my bf and I were still adjusting to working out finances between us now that we kind of operate as a unit. I agreed and table the convo for a few months.
So fast forward again to March 2024. My bf got a new job (higher pay) , I got a considerable raise at my job. I also was granted full WFH flexibility that I didn’t have before. We cleared out our second floor area and made it more livable , adding space to our already decent sized rental.
My boyfriend and I decided we actually might be ready to get a 3rd cat. We both are making more, we now have the space, plus I will be home all the time. So, after thinking about it for a few weeks , we got a 3rd kitty the first week of April 2024.
My friend got extremely upset with me. She felt like she “had to say something” because she was worried about the cats well-being being adopted by us. She felt it was a selfish and irresponsible decision because “we just talked about how you weren’t financially ready”. That was months ago and our finances changed for the better but … whatever. She also said her time is valuable and she’s not gonna waste her breath on someone who asks for advice but won’t take it, and she “can’t support” my reckless decision to put my other cat through “even more” trauma than she’s already been through since she got hurt … in May of 2023. She basically said she’s stepping back and that she can’t be bothered with me any more. She said doesn’t support my decision, and cares too much about animals to witness us be “irresponsible” with one. She hasn’t talked to me since April and made it clear she wants nothing to do with me.
I don’t know if i’ve just been gaslit too many times over the years but is this valid …? Like is this a good reason to cut someone off? My initial thought is that it’s my life and my cat and it’s not her place to determine what’s best for me, but is that an ignorant way to think? Let it be known that my entire life is about these cats and if anything I am probably TOO obsessed with them. The idea that I adopt when i’m not ready for my own selfish need to have more couldn’t be farther from reality.
I’m usually way more confident and sure of myself but I think I second guess myself when it comes to her because she has always been highly critical of me and my decisions.

He is a friend… He’s kind. He’s respectful. He is gentle. He’s soft with his words. He makes me feel safe and warm. He likes to have fun. He likes to travel. He loves his parents. He loves his family. I think he’s everything I want in someone. Minus the quiet and shy part but he’s definitely opening up in a fun and exciting way.. I met him through my sister and BIL. And we have been friends for 2 years now. They had originally wanted to introduce me to this guy but I said I wasn’t interested in getting to know anyone and from what they told me I had a hunch he would be someone who liked really pretty skinny slim petite girls. I wasn’t that. So they just introduced me to their whole friend group and we all just became friends. Our friends would casually joke about us being together when we all hung out as a group. Or if both of us were busy and couldn’t hang out with them at the same time they’d joke that we were secretly on a date etc. He never said much and just took it. I would brush it off as well not much thinking much of it since we were the only two singles ones… but There were times when I couldn’t tell if he was just being nice or if it was him showing me signs. But the more we all hung out the more I got to see what kind of person he was. I remember admitting to my BIL that I was kind of interested in getting to know him more now but I was really drunk when we had that convo and never brought it up again when I was sober cause I was embarrassed. He was supportive though and said I was a really good person and he thought we matched really well. The first time I admitted to myself that I probably really liked him, I was really hurt. i never confessed to him or anything like that but i just came to a realization… It took me so many years to finally love myself and appreciate every stage of who I am where I am and what I look like… but I realized I must have really really liked this guy cause I tried so hard to change who I was to see if he would like me or give me a sign. I tried working out to become skinny and I went out of my way to always hangout with this friend group. Our friend group was scheduled to go on a trip together. I told myself I’d see how the trip goes and really feel him out to see if he was interested… I thought I mentally prepared myself well enough but I guess I didn’t. On this trip I had mentioned a different girl friend that I wanted to meet up with with our friend group. I don’t remember how we got into this convo but I ended up showing him a picture and his face lit up. She’s a really beautiful girl who’s fit. He wanted to meet her too. So the next day my friend group met up with my other girl friend and her friend. This girl friend of mine knew about my lole for this guy so she was never interested.. I could instantly tell the shift in his body language. Keep in mind he’s a really quiet and reserved guy. But I could see the way he would watch out for her. Like her bottle fell and from across the friend group he told her she dropped her bottle. Little shifts like that in his attitude that made me realize what he was like if he was interested in someone… any way fast forward we started walking around and at one point my girl friend’s friend(who I just met that day as well) randomly asked him if he liked me. I was right in front of them. But I heard. With no hesitation in his voice he said no she’s like my sister… my heart fell to my stomach… the first time in 6+ years after my last relationship that I was allowing myself to like someone again and I got sister-zoned… if I’m being honest it really hurt my self esteem. I worked so hard to really love myself and I felt like I was a good person who was funny and kind and selfless and giving and family oriented(I’m not just trying to boost my ego lol almost all the people In my life has said these to me before) but the first person I allow myself to like in so long has no interest in me. All the little clues I got were stories I made up in my head. I prided myself on being good at reading people.. but it was really all in my head… anyway I just pretended like I didn’t hear anything and continued with where I was going. I realized then that he was just nice to me not interested in me. After that trip he started talking more to the friend group about the girls he had asked out on dates and the kind of girls he liked and how his dates went. Then I really realized I prob was just like a sister to him. And he’s was just like any other guy.. the ones who likes pretty skinny girls. He would talk to girls that weren’t the best people but they were really pretty and skinny. After that I tried to stop myself from continuing to like him so I distanced myself from the friend group. Just a little bit. But I also started a new job so that also prevented me from seeing them too often. I noticed myself think about him less and being less effected by his dating life. I felt good again. Just really focused on myself and reminded myself to stay true to who I am so I can attract my person to me. But just this past weekend… we went on a trip together again. I really thought I was good! He really has just been feeling like a friend. But this trip was only my sister and BIL and him and I. Everything seems to be going great I played wing woman for him and helped him meet girls! But I think I realize.. I really do like him. Like I like him probably a lot more than I thought. Yes I played his wing woman and I wasn’t very jealous or anything like that.. I know i was hella cute on this trip and I know I’m a good person. But the whole time I when he was talking to girls.. I didn’t wish to be them.. I just wished he’d see me. I introduced those girls to him to see if he would choose me.. even with a married girl with 3 kids who says she’s in an open relationship and who is older than him he didn’t choose me. We got into a deep conversation about his last super toxic relationship and about the kind of woman he wants. He named everything I am(traits about myself that others have said about me not just what I think about myself). I kept listening and realized the only thing that prob would make me not fit to be his ideal woman is because I’m a bigger girl. Anyway I guess moral of the story is that I just really like this guy who prob doesn’t see me anymore than a sister. And I can’t help it that I’m not the one he’s unwilling to choose. I just have to stay true to who I am. And I will naturally attract my person to me.
Also I don’t think I am delusional and obsessive. I have kept a good distance and I have never crossed any boundaries of friendship. I just had a lot of people we know question why we weren’t together and many people always said they thought we are a good match.. but I’m just not the one he is choosing to have. And maybe it’s time I accept that.
What do you guys think? Idk what kind of validation or answers I’m looking for I think I just want to share my pain and heartbreak as 28 year old who will prob stay single Forever because this one sided like was Kind of painful. lol

33F and 34M My bf moved in after being raped and at first it was nice but then things started to turn for the worst . COVID hit shortly after and we were in the house working day in and day out . Many days I couldn’t talk or express myself fully.. towards the end of COVID when things started to lift. I went out with friends because I just didn’t want to be in the house it became daunting and I was running from my emotions. Barely wanted to be touched, talk about emotions or anything rather . I felt it was a good thing for him being there but now I feel like I am paying for mistakes I made then. Should’ve been single and worked on self. I am still not 100% but willing to try to undo some of the damage that was done . I went out with my two girl best friends a week apart for their birthdays. I was just trying to have a good time. I came home at 3 am both times . I left the bar at 2 am grabbed food on the way home. Never cheated but did tell him I would be home earlier the second time but my friends brother was watching her newborn and she checked in on him before dropping me home. I stayed in contact , answered his calls and he knew about the house visit. He has been pressed ever since saying I broke a promise and that I didn’t keep my word even with the call to check in about a change of plans . Now he is ALWAYS talking about my betrayal and not keeping my word and I didn’t fix it when he brought it up. This was about 3 years ago. Now we have a kid and I have anxiety , depressed don’t feel loved. He’s continuously harking on past mistakes. I often don’t want to talk or express myself to him, he cuts me off and just continuously reiterating that I am a shitty person whether in conversation, through ig messages. States he wants to fix it and wants change to stay together. I don’t hang with friends, always with him and his family, not happy and SAHM now with him at home as well . AITA not being considerate or is he for not letting go and expecting change with mental and emotional warfare.

Context: We are both 32, met on neopets at age 11, met in person at age 14, didn’t see each other again until 2022 but remained close friends online.
In the summer of 2022, I was going through the absolute worst part of my life. Early June, I went on vacation out of state, and though I was in a 10 year relationship at the time, I didn’t talk to my at the time girlfriend much. Our relationship was cratering because she was struggling with alcoholism and depression. I was trying to figure out a way to break things off in a clean way, unwind our financial and living situation, etc. During this vacation, we didn’t talk much. It was tense and frankly exhausting. Instead, every day, from morning til night, I was talking to my now ex. Mind you… I wasn’t cheating. I didn’t have feelings for her at the time. We were both just in a bad place - her dealing with the father of her 3 children cheating on her, and still living with him, me, dealing with a failing relationship I desperately needed out of. To be honest, most of our conversations were about work, where our relationships went wrong, and our kids. My son from another relationship ship is low functioning intelligence / autistic, which also caused a lot of issues - my partner at the time did try to accept this and be a mother figure but deep down, it was too difficult for her.
I get back home, and in the span of two weeks, my life fucking cratered. I’m talking about cinema grade levels of shit hit the fan.

1. My son burned my garage down to the studs while I was asleep - I had to run and pull him out of a burning garage, get my then girlfriend out of bed, and get our dog outside. We didn’t have a fire extinguisher so it was, so far, my closest near death experience
2. I was forced out of a company I co-founded by my 2 business partners, losing a 125k year salary, just months before the company was purchased for approximately 10,000,000 - my share would have been 10%
3. My at the time girlfriend went to a routine doctors appointment - a woman who struggled with alcoholism, has pcos and ovarian cysts, with what we were told an almost 0% fertility rate….was 7 months pregnant.

My son was held in the care of the local state children’s hospital for mental and physical examination. My home was in shambles, and the insurance company dragged their feet throughout the entire ordeal. I was reeling from a massive financial blow and loss of identity in a lot of ways, because that company felt like my life’s mission. My current gf and I split up, she moved out to live with her aunt, and it wasn’t pretty. I was so angry, so defeated.
I had a complete mental breakdown. I’m talking, I flew my mother in town to help with daily tasks. I couldn’t function. I lost about 30lbs, lost many friendships both personal and professional.
But this woman was there for me. She was a shoulder to cry on. She bore the brunt of my mental and emotional exhaustion and never pushed me away, never looked at me differently. We were drawn to each other during this time of complete fucking chaos, and one night, I hit on her. I threw out some bait, she took it, and we met up for the first time since we were teenagers.
We hit it off tremendously. It was like we hadn’t been apart a day in our lives. We both fell in love, quickly, as I began to rebuild my life, welcome a new child into the world, repair my home, work on myself professionally. She was there, through all of it, and she made it easier. I could lean on her, I could look forward to her, no matter what life had thrown me, I thought I had found my soulmate in this woman I’ve known longer than anyone. So, we started to date.
It was difficult in the beginning. She had to move out of her ex boyfriends house and get an apartment. This took a lot of time and planning because she was working a retail job and hadn’t been on her own in 7 years. This man was abusive, controlling, and eventually she managed to get an apartment with her mother to get away from him. He was furious that after a year of the two of them being broken up, that we got together. He wrongfully assumed I’d been in the wings all these years, which couldn’t be farther from the truth - he had cheated on her and she left him and refused to reconcile. It took a few months but she got an apartment. This was difficult for her, she left a nice area and moved to a low income area. She could only see her kids 50% of the time. Transportation was rough between both towns. It put a huge strain on her mentally.
I, meanwhile, did what I could. In the beginning I went out of my way to see her at every opportunity I could. I’d take her out to dinner often, visit her at work, stay over at her apartment. She’d come over to my house. It wasn’t easy - I bought my home just as Covid started to rock the housing market, and I had to land in a rural town. So we had 45 miles between us. I was also busy dealing with life without a live in partner, facilitating my sons care, and having my newborn 50% of the time.
But it was good, I thought. We got along well, it was electric, it was our escape. About a year into the relationship, the mother of my child had to move back into my spare room. She was struggling and I was not going to turn her or my daughter away in the time of need, it was not even a consideration. My ex understood, but acknowledged the pressure it put on us both mentally and emotionally - my house was now, effectively, off limits. This greatly reduced the time we could see each other. We’d go 2-3 weeks without getting together, with our only time between managing our schedules being maybe 2-3 hours on a random day, or a quick outing. Our relationship devolved quickly into a FWB situationship, and this is where the mistakes were made.
I didn’t see it at the time, but that’s all we really had. I was complacent and aloof, a little distant, and just… okay only seeing her every now and then. I think deep down I wanted more but it became such an insurmountable hurdle to put together. During this next part of the year or so remaining, she began to fall out of love with me. She told me that she felt like we were just FWB, stagnant, and going nowhere. She was dealing with depression, openly despising herself, and struggling to see a future with me. I realized that my complacency was to blame, but to a certain degree, she too was complacent.
Instead of voicing her concerns, talking options, solutions on how to build a life together, she sunk into her depression.l, and her feelings faded. I guess the how’s turned into why’s, and the what ifs turned into oh well. I do acknowledge I took on a huge responsibility dating a single mother of 3, but…. After learning these things from her the last few days, I realized.
I never felt like a team. We were together in flesh and bond only, we never discussed our future. We didn’t plan, we merely hoped. And we drifted away from each other, and in the end, it became too much for her to bear, and being alone felt like the best solution for her. She left me 2 weeks ago after bringing these issues to light. Initially I was devastated. I collected my thoughts and spoke with her last night.
I told her, I did want more, but I got comfortable, and so did you for a bit. We were stagnant because neither of us pushed the other forward. I wanted to be a team, I wanted to work towards something, but the opportunity just slipped through our hands. I begged. I pleaded. I told her, I’d do whatever I can to build a life for us. I own my home, it’s small, but it’s something. I can work harder, I can figure things out, I can work towards pulling together the things we need. I can be more present, more attentive. Because despite the both of us checking out to an extent, I very much still love her.
I feel and see her everywhere in my daily life. I cling to her, I dream of her, I long for her. I feel like the deck was so stacked against us, that we both bit off more than we could chew. But in the end, she didn’t want to keep trying, she didn’t see a future, and I’m stuck picking up the pieces and so desperately wanting things to work.
She told me to move on, to heal, to grow stronger and become a better person. She has no hard feelings, no contempt or regret. She just lacks the physical, mental, and emotional capacity to have a relationship, and that she doesn’t want to. But I still can’t shake the fact that I really thought I had found my person. I love this woman. I…. I wasn’t ready to stop. I risked so much, pushed through so much adversity to bring us together, but in the end, it just wasn’t enough.
It sucks. I’m devastated, defeated. I truly feel like life looked me in the eyes and said no, you are not good enough for this. I blocked her this morning because I realize she has made her peace and moved on, and that I will only drag her down, push her away, and erode my dignity at every turn, because I am still struggling to accept no for an answer. She didn’t cheat on me, she didn’t abuse me. We never fought, argued. We got along so, so, so well. She was the most important person in my life outside of my children, and I failed to show her that. And I feel in some ways, she failed me too. Because when it got hard, challenging, when it became time to work on life together, she got spooked, spiraled, and…. Gave up. She gave up on us.
I thank you for reading. It’s disorganized and insane because frankly I don’t know how to put all of this on paper. I’m going into therapy next month to revisit a lot of the issues I faced before her and to understand life after her and what went wrong. I have never felt a void like this in my life, there is a her shaped hole in my life and just….. this is just another level of pain.

TREKMOVIE: "[...]
This episode [Discovery 5x8] evokes some Trek classics, especially “The Inner Light.” How much of bringing up older episodes is part of the discussion in the room?
I feel like it is part of every episode that I worked on Discovery. It was always important for me to find reference episodes. There was a common joke during season four when we were working remotely and after we get back on Zoom after lunch I would be like, “I just watched this episode of Voyager!”
So, yes, “Inner Light,” which I hesitate to say because, to me, it is arguably the best written episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation. That and “Family” in terms of emotional exploration of Jean-Luc Picard. “Tapestry” was also on my mind, having an opportunity to reflect on your life and the choices you’ve made. “Balance of Terror” as well, hiding and trying to suss out what your enemy was doing. There are also little inspirations in my episodes from the movies, so in this one trying to gauge shield frequencies and harmonic reference, that is me as a child watching Star Trek Generations in theaters and being like, “Just change the shield frequency!” as the Bird of Prey starts attacking the Enterprise. [laughs]
There was an even bigger movie reference with Hy’Rell…
Oh yeah, Star Trek VI, I love that movie. During the WGA strike last summer I had the opportunity to meet Nicholas Mayer. And I went up to him to talk about how much I loved The Undiscovered Country. And he was like, “Most people come at me with Wrath of Khan.” So yeah, I always loved the Efrosian, I thought he was such a cool design. I always forget there was another Efrosian in Star Trek IV, the helmsmen on the Saratoga. And when we were doing this episode I was like, what species do we want to see, but one that won’t be a production nightmare? I would love to do a Catian, but in live-action it could be expensive. So I went back to Efrosian and I thought we have only ever seen two of them, which is insane because one of them is the President. [laughs] So it was an opportunity to give one an actual name and also see one who has had a female presentation because the other two are very masculine presenting. So I sent the reference and the design team liked it and they thought they could do an updated version of the makeup.
I am sure some fans are going to come at me over the vision. In a deleted scene in Star Trek VI the President has a little eyepiece he uses and in Star Trek IV the Saratoga helmsman also has white contact lenses. So the deleted scene shows the President is blind and that may be a species characteristic. So do we lean into if they are blind or not? And I was like, it’s 800 years later than Geordi, who got his optical contacts, so maybe it has been addressed. I was just really excited to back to a species that has so little defined and add a new character to the mix, but being really cognizant of not defining them too much so writers and storytellers in the future have a real opportunity to dig into the Efrosians and say more about their culture.
A surprising reference comes from something much more recent when Reno made the joke about Hysperia, from Lower Decks. So are you guys on the lookout for ways you can connect to the new shows?
Sure. internally, we share a lot of material. On Discovery, we would assign certain writers to cover a show and then you get put into their script distribution. So, if we’re in contradiction with another show, we catch it. We are not just looking out for making sure we are not stepping on each other’s toes but also, for me, it’s really important to show a little love to the other series.
I think that’s one thing that Star Trek has always done very well. I think it’s one thing the fans have always responded to.
Now for the Hysperians, first, the original pass didn’t include Reno because we didn’t know we were going to have Tig [Notaro] and I was told very late Reno was going to be in my episode. So, we were talking about ideas and somebody wrote a rough version of a joke, “Oh I was repairing buoys out by Talaxia, and Talaxians really know how to party.” I was always very cognizant about not being the “canon cop,” but that’s where I was like, “Wait a minute, Talaxia is way deep in the Delta Quadrant, when did Jett Reno have an opportunity to do that?” We never saw Disco jump to the Delta Quadrant so maybe we should change that planet and that episode of Lower Decks just aired and I was like, “What about the Hysperians?” That episode is hysterical and if you put Jett Reno on a fantasy planet she would get up to some intense shenanigans. I just loved that mental image.
[...]"
Full Interview (TrekMovie):
https://trekmovie.com/2024/05/19/interview-discovery-writer-eric-j-robbins-on-efrosians-and-more-star-trek-connections-in-labyrinths/

Album first: https://imgur.com/a/ZnEVrHz
Yet another review! I'm almost done with my collection, just 2 or 3 more and I'm done. When I'm finished, you'll have a very comprehensive guide of Mexican boot/shoemakers in my profile.
Why Mexican shoes? Because I live in Mexico, and they are more affordable and easy to find than other options. Besides, I get to support local business, and that is a big plus for me. Obviously, English is not my first language, so bear with me.
Disclaimer: This review has been completely sponsored by my compulsive shopping. I have not received any free boots or discounts, but if someone wants to give a free pair of boots, my feet are ready.

Brand: John Doe Shoes

John Doe Shoes is a Mexican boot/shoe manufacturer with a peculiar business model. You get to choose the leather first, then the boot or shoe style. When I was starting to get into boots I was really confused by their website, so I'll do my best to break it down for you guys:
Sample sale: https://www.johndoeshoes.com/sample-sale
These are shoes that in stock. You can buy those at a lower price, and you don't have to wait for them to make your boots. The downside is there's not really a lot of options, but it's worth it. I actually bought this boots from the sample sale. Pretty forward buying process. Prices are in USD, and they ship outside of Mexico.
Made to order: https://www.johndoeshoes.com/mto/
Style guide: https://www.johndoeshoes.com/style-guide/
Here you start choosing the leather. The pictures are just examples but when you click on "Brown SB Foot Tanning Co" you get to choose the exact model and sole you want. You can see their different models in the style guide. They have 2 lasts: milo last (like mine) and their normal last (more rounded in the front). If you see few photos of their work, you'll recognize them easily.
For example: Choosing "Brown SB Foot Tanning Co" > 420 Cap Toe (Milo Last) + D width + Studded sole + Goodyear welt > You'll get a similar boot as mine, but made with Brown SB Foot Tanning Co leather.
They have a running 3x2 sale. Just add 3 made to order shoes or boots to your cart, and you'll get the discount.
You can see some ideas of what to order in their social media, but they are not very active: https://www.instagram.com/johndoeshoes/

The boots:

Russet Horsehide leather is not usually found in boots. It's no the fancy leather from a horse butt. It is more of a heavy-duty leather: thick, stiff and more visible grain. I think this particular leather is from Horween Tannery. I bought it in natural color, and it is veg tan, so it should develop a nice patina. These are my first natural veg tan leather boots.

• Upper: russet horsehide
• Leather lining
• Gusseted tongue
• Studded sole
• No midsole
• A half insole (or insert? idk the proper term). You can see the photo in the album.
• Goodyear welt construction

I paid $190 USD for them. Their normal price would be $292 but I got them from the sample sale.
About sizing, I'm a 9D brannock and I ordered that size. Another redditor recommended sizing down half a size for their Milo last, I kind of agree. I like my boots on the tighter side, so 8.5 would have been ideal. Anyway, I'll just add a leather insert or wear thicker socks.
I've got nothing bad to say about the build quality. I'm very pleased with what I got. I thought they would be stiffer at first, but after the ones from Urban Wolf Club, everything else seems lightweight.

Could be better:

• When I bought from the sample sale, I thought the one in the photo was literally the one I'm getting, but that's not the case. The one in the photo had their normal last, and I got the milo last. They should add what kind of last it has. I'm happy with my purchase, but still not ideal.
• There is no leather midsole. I have to be honest, up until this boots I had never questioned the existence of a midsole since all of my other boots had one. I honestly thought that was the standard. I'm very used to having leather midsoles, so I'll ask for one next time. I recommend you do the same.
• Communication is not ideal. I actually got the boots before the shipping status updated on my order. Shipping was fast, but I live in Mexico so that's expected.

Would I buy from them again:

Yep, that 3x2 sale seems like a really good deal. Besides, if I want a pair of longwings made with tan horsehide chromexcel, John Doe Shoes is THE PLACE to go. Just look at these beauties: Tan Horsehide CX Connor Longwings. There are some mixed reviews on this sub, but my experience has been mostly positive. I'm sure I'll order again someday.

Hi there! 👋
I'm Gonçalo "Eugini" Oliveira, a passionate Dungeon Master who brings cinematic storytelling to every session, and I'm currently trying to achieve the most immersive TTRPG experience out there – and I would love your help in doing it!

A bit about Eugini – the Dungeon Master:

🎬 F*ilm & TV Professional: *Years of working as a Producer and Writer in the entertainment industry have given me a passion for creating worlds and making them a reality. Check out my credits and see if you (unknowingly) might've seen my work before!
📚 B*it of a Bookworm: *My love for D&D started with my love for books! My first book was The Little Prince, and that book is to this day my first love. You might catch this passion during sessions, where my style tends to focus on the narrative side of things, in both NPCs, storylines, descriptions – you name it!
😂 G*oofball: *I'm a sucker for a laugh. I value serious topics as well as great dramatic character arcs. However, it's my outgoing and carefree charisma that allows me to run NPCs as highly nuanced performances, usually doing voices and acting for the sake of story. When I perform during a session, I try to live each character as they are – serious or not!

About the Campaign:

Step into Barovia, a land ensnared by a vampiric curse. In The Mists of Fate: Strahd’s Legacy, your actions and decisions will shape the narrative in a player-driven saga full of deep storytelling and rich role-play. This Curse of Strahd campaign promises an immersive and cinematic experience like never before.
By taking advantage of Foundry VTT and other tools, such as AI-modules for highly personalized character creation, and creating a short-animated film featuring your characters after each section of the story, I aim to make your character feel real and ready for its own show! 🎥

Why Join Us?

🎬 C*inematic Storytelling: *Experience D&D like a blockbuster movie where immersion is king. State-of-the-art automation and cinematics paired with Foundry VTT will make the Theatre of the Mind feel alive on your screen every session.
🚀 E*xperience Innovation: *Never before seen use of AI for TTRPG will allow you to see your character come alive. After each chapter of the campaign, an animated short-film will let you relive your actions and their impact on the story.
🤝 C*ollaborative Gameplay: *Your choices will significantly impact the story. The way you make friends or foes ultimately decides your fate in this dreary land of shadows.
🌈 W*elcoming Environment: *Ideal for both newcomers and seasoned players. Our goal is to give you the most fun experience possible!
If you're ready to defy fate and venture into the unknown, join us!
Campaign settings in link below!
🔗 Sign Up Here
Working to make your dreams come alive!
Best, Eugini