Sat upload

Today I want to tell my story of how I self-advocated and what I did to achieve that goal. I'm telling my story to help those who are in a similar position to what I was in and to inspire those to self-advocate.
To recap from my earlier posts. I have ADHD and fell under the "multiple disabilities" characterization. My high school teacher claimed that I have autism (Not diagnosed). I personally don't believe I have autism or at the very least I have a high functioning autism. Throughout most of my school career, I was in a self-contained classroom with kids with severe disabilities. Even if I was in the general population I had a paraprofessional or peer tutor. I never believed that I should have been in that position. As a consequence, I never really learned any social skills, I was segregated, and felt like that people didn't want anything to do with me because I was sped. The reason why I ended up in this position was probably a combination of me having the "multiple disabilities'' characterization and me testing low in three year revaluation tests. If you want more info on this then feel free to search my profile. This is an alt account and is primarily used to ask questions about special ed so It's really easy to find stuff about me.
Before I get into my story I just want to make it clear that I'm not against special ed. There's good and bad people in every profession. I believed I was in danger for myself and for my future. I don't believe that my teacher was evil and had the best of intentions but he was putting me in a position that was hurting me and I had to act. If you have any questions or feedback feel free to let me know in the comments. Another thing is that this post has been really hard to make. It opened up some old wounds and as a result took several days to write.
Here's my story: So in late middle school I was tired of the placement that I was in. I was tired of not having friends, Not being able to socialize with my peers, not being able to date. I also was thinking about what my life will look like after high school, I was concerned that I was going to never have friends, Never be in a relationship, and not have the social skills to make those friends. I was generally very concerned for my future. So I decided that for my 8th grade year (2017-2018) I would do my absolute best for both my behavior and academics. Throughout the year nothing changed. I was hoping that me doing well would show that I didn't need any support but at the end of the year I still had paraprofessionals in most of my classes and was being pulled out for tests. In the summer between middle school and high school all I can think about is I want high school to be different. I wanted friends, I wanted a relationship, and I had dreams of me in the student council. When I got into high school I had peer tutors along with paraprofessionals (Peer Tutors are general ed students who sign up as an elective to help special needs kids. They basically serve the role as paraprofessionals with less responsibility). I did everything again and had the exact same result. In January of 2019 (freshmen year) I decided that my current strategy wasn't working. They also started making the peer tutors fill out behavioral checklists for their student(s) by grading them on how well they behaved/followed directions and gave them badges that say "peer tutor" which made me feel singled out. Because of that the peer tutors felt more like babysitters then someone that is an equal. So I went to my special ed teacher and asked him to remove the paraprofessional and the peer tutors. He told me no and said that I needed them. I changed my strategy again and I was going to ask for the Peer Tutors to be gone first, then focus on removing the paraprofessionals. I was more concerned about the peer tutors over the paraprofessionals because I was concerned that since they were part of the student body that this was going to affect me when I was running for the student council. I was worried that they'd tell others I was special needs then people would think I was incompetent. So every 2 weeks I would ask him again to remove them and each time he would give me a different excuse on why I couldn't be alone. Here's some of the excuses he gave me: "The peer tutors need to be there to collect data", "You need to prove that you can do the work yourself", "It's not up to me. It's the general education teacher that decides if you need a peer tutor or an aide", "Peer Tutors are supposed to represent a trainer for a job. If you refuse training then you're going to get fired". I brought it up again during my yearly IEP which took place in March. Once again my teacher said no, bringing up another excuse. As far as I can remember, my parents were neutral about the aide situation. Later one peer tutor was removed, what happened is that the peer tutor moved to a different town and they didn't bother on sending a substitute. A win is a win so I celebrated it. At the end of my freshman year I was pretty much defeated and didn't achieve the goal of being 100% independent. Over the summer I took a look at my situation and decided that my current plan is not working. I knew that when my sophomore year of high school starts I will have aides and peer tutors in classes. I knew that if I wanted to get what I wanted I would have to do something big. I knew that I would have to put up a fight, and put in a lot more effort. Over the summer I developed a war mindset inspired by two quotes from Sun Tzu:
"Victorious warriors win first and then go to war, while defeated warriors go to war first and then seek to win”
“If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.”
I knew that I can't be going into sophomore year blind, so I started drafting a plan. I created a Google doc outlining my goals and what I wanted to accomplish. I knew that I won't be able to win every battle and that I need to choose which fight is worth fighting for. I thought to myself, “Well the peer tutors we're given training on the first day of school and probably have strategies to deal with poor behavior but what about planned well organized protests?” So I began researching strategies on how paraprofessionals/peer tutors dealt with negative behavior and reverse engineered those tactics. I read forms, I Watched YouTube videos and found as much information that I could find. For the peer tutors I didn't know too much about them. I didn't know if it was something that only my school did or if other schools did it. I did some research and found out that other schools had a peer tutor program and some have uploaded training videos on YouTube. Some peer tutors told me that they did babysitting and did nanny work so I looked up babysitting tips. I reverse engineered all of those tactics and came up with strategies to counter those techniques and put all that information that I learned into a google doc that I can use for future reference. During this time I also researched how to become a better negotiator and started learning a little bit of psychology. The plan was to first negotiate and if that doesn't work I will protest and make demands and negotiate. Over the summer I got really good at negotiating and practiced a lot on my father and my sister (they were totally oblivious). To this day I use those negotiating tactics. After I created my document and was satisfied with all the information, I went to bed that night and knew that I have already won and that my sophomore year will be my last year that I 1-1 peer tutor or aide.
Fast forward to the first day of school, as expected I had peer tutors and aides assigned to me in classes. My sped teacher had a chalkboard On the back wall full of sticky notes that had everyone's schedules and a name of someone was assigned to that student for each class. This time around I only had one peer tutor outside of the special ed classes. This is a big improvement over the three I had before but I still have my original goal of having none. For the paraprofessionals I had 2 in Gen classes.The goal was to first remove the peer tutors then the paraprofessionals. Even though this seems to be an improvement I continued with the plan. Since this was the first day, the peer tutors were in another classroom learning policies and other stuff they needed to know so I was alone for the day. I walked over to my special ed teacher and ask him one final time to remove the peer tutor he says no and then I asked him to let me be alone for 2 weeks so I can prove I don't need help and he still denies me. I then tell him that I will allow the peer tutor for 2 weeks and after that she needs to go. My teacher doesn't respond. (To add context the peer tutor that I had, she was a peer tutor in my math class in the prior semester so I already know who she was. We used to talk a lot and was surprised when I saw that she was assigned to me.)
For 2 weeks she mostly left me alone with her occasionally checking up on me. For those 2 weeks I purposely close my self off and adopted a body language that would subconsciously discourage her from approaching me. I did this by keeping my head low and staying as focused as possible. The only thing she did was confront me when I start packing up 2 minutes before the bell rings. She tells me that I shouldn't be packing up and to pull my stuff out again. I tell her no and hold my ground. She writes in my planner that I packed my stuff up early and refuse to pull it out. That happened like 2 or 3 times. On Thursday on the second week my class was tasked to create a PowerPoint. FYI this was a mythology class, while I was doing this PowerPoint I decided instead of manually trying to type in the locations and people from this mythology which the names were very long and complicated. I decided would be easier just to copy and paste them in. My peer tutor sees me doing this and doesn't say anything. At the end of class she writes that I plagiarized in my planner and tells my special ed teacher in person what happened. My sped teacher pulls me out of class (I had his math class right after mythology) and starts telling me that my peer tutor has seen me copy and pasting paragraphs and goes on this lecturing on why plagiarizing is bad. I explained to him that I wasn't copying paragraphs It was only copying names and locations and explain my reason for it. He didn't believe me but he didn't make me retake the assignment. After that I was pissed off and the next day I confronted her about it. I forgot what her reasoning for not telling me was but I told her that she needs to look into things before she makes false reports. After that incident, I decided to wait a week before I ask my teacher to remove her. Also during those first 3 weeks I turned down help from peer tutors and paras if possible In the special ed classroom. I did this to prevent sending any mix signals. I personally didn't mind if I had to work with a peer tutopara or not In the actual sped classroom. I only cared if it was in any of the general education classes. I just thought it would look contradictory if I was accepting help in the sped class and then requesting peer tutors to be removed from my gen classes.
At the beginning of the fourth week I went to school early and went to my sped teacher's class before first hour starts and then I again asked him to remove the peer tutor and the paraprofessionals. He says no again and brings up that I was being academically dishonest by plagiarizing. I tell my side of the story once again on what happened and he still doesn't believe me. At this point I leave and more pissed off. At this point negotiations didn't work so I started small protests by preventing the peer tutors from filling out my planer and the behavioral checklist. Most of them didn't care since there was other students they can fill out and they only need to fill out one to be graded for the day. One peer tutor gave me the puppy dog eye treatment and I eventually cave and let her fill it out. I still let the one peer tutor that was assigned to me in the gen class due to me being the only student and my intention wasn't to ruin, her grade. During the fourth week I began brainstorming ideas on how I can do a massive protest.
On Thursday of the fourth week of school, a walk into the mythology class and it started out like any other day. Class started and my teacher starts talking. I pull up my phone to respond to some messages and my peer tutor sees me. She asks me to hand my phone over to her and I tell her no. She tells me that I can't be on my phone and I tell her okay but I'm still not giving it to you. She then pulls out her phone and puts it on the table. She then tells me to put my phone on the table. I tell her no again. A few minutes past and the teacher finishes up talking. She passes the assignment and immediately my peer tutor begins to try and help by reading the questions. I slide the packet over closer to me and start ignoring her. I was hoping that she will get the hint and leave me alone. She doesn't so put on my hoodie and tried to mentally block her out. I don't remember what she said during all this since I was blocking it out but I do remember her touching me and the general ed teacher coming over and start assisting the peer tutor. It was a lot of pressure and I was actually about to give up because it was too much. But they both gaved up before I did and I was very relieved. After that, the class was pretty much quiet. The peer tutor wrote an entire paragraph on what happened. I walked to my math class and sat down. I then see my peer tutor walking into class and ask for my sped teacher. I already knew it was about me. I see them talk for 2 minutes and sure enough I see my teacher calling me over. I walked outside the classroom and me and the teacher begin to go at it. We end up saying the same things we have said before. However, my teacher this time mentioned that if I keep up my behavior that he's going to call in a meeting with my parents. The rest of math class was pretty much the same. However, my English class with the same teacher he went on a rant about using accommodations seeing that he had a disability growing up which was tourette's and he were love to have a peer tutor. I was quiet for the whole class since I was already exhausted because of everything else that had already happened. For the rest of the weekend, I've been coming up with plans on how I would be able to pull off a massive protest.
Now for the good news. On the fifth week of school, I noticed that my peer tutor was missing. My teacher pulled me aside again and told me that he decided that he was going to pull her for 2 weeks to see how well I would do without her. I told him thank you, that's what I wanted since the beginning of the school year. After those 2 weeks he didn't reinstate her and I didn't have a peer tutor or paraprofessionals in gen classes since. The deal moving forward was as long as I had a D or better he wasn't going to send any support unless I asked for it. My relationship with that sped teacher also had improved significantly. Later in my Junior year of high school I ran in my school's election and won. I was given the social media position.
In hindsight, I'm glad I didn't have to pull off a big protest. But the same time I wish that this situation could have ended in a different way.
Everything that I just told you is only the tip of the iceberg. There's so much detail that I had to leave out just to make this story shorter. Lot of it I'm still processing even though I found great strength in myself fighting back against a system that I believe was ruining my life. That war mindset hasn't left my mentality yet. I'm still dealing with the consequences of me being in special ed. Everything I told you happened 5 years ago and I'm still living through it like it just happened. I'm mentally recovering and eventually I will recover. Right now I'm in therapy and I'm writing down everything I can in a Google doc to process everything emotionally. Maybe one day I'll give that story to a writer and make a book out of it.
If you have any questions feel free ask them, I would love to answer them.

Today I want to tell my story of how I self-advocated and what I did to achieve that goal. I'm telling my story to help those who are in a similar position to what I was in and to inspire those to self-advocate.
To recap from my earlier posts. I have ADHD and fell under the "multiple disabilities" characterization. My high school teacher claimed that I have autism (Not diagnosed). I personally don't believe I have autism or at the very least I have a high functioning autism. Throughout most of my school career, I was in a self-contained classroom with kids with severe disabilities. Even if I was in the general population I had a paraprofessional or peer tutor. I never believed that I should have been in that position. As a consequence, I never really learned any social skills, I was segregated, and felt like that people didn't want anything to do with me because I was sped. The reason why I ended up in this position was probably a combination of me having the "multiple disabilities'' characterization and me testing low in three year revaluation tests. If you want more info on this then feel free to search my profile. This is an alt account and is primarily used to ask questions about special ed so It's really easy to find stuff about me.
Before I get into my story I just want to make it clear that I'm not against special ed. There's good and bad people in every profession. I believed I was in danger for myself and for my future. I don't believe that my teacher was evil and had the best of intentions but he was putting me in a position that was hurting me and I had to act. If you have any questions or feedback feel free to let me know in the comments. Another thing is that this post has been really hard to make. It opened up some old wounds and as a result took several days to write.
Here's my story: So in late middle school I was tired of the placement that I was in. I was tired of not having friends, Not being able to socialize with my peers, not being able to date. I also was thinking about what my life will look like after high school, I was concerned that I was going to never have friends, Never be in a relationship, and not have the social skills to make those friends. I was generally very concerned for my future. So I decided that for my 8th grade year (2017-2018) I would do my absolute best for both my behavior and academics. Throughout the year nothing changed. I was hoping that me doing well would show that I didn't need any support but at the end of the year I still had paraprofessionals in most of my classes and was being pulled out for tests. In the summer between middle school and high school all I can think about is I want high school to be different. I wanted friends, I wanted a relationship, and I had dreams of me in the student council. When I got into high school I had peer tutors along with paraprofessionals (Peer Tutors are general ed students who sign up as an elective to help special needs kids. They basically serve the role as paraprofessionals with less responsibility). I did everything again and had the exact same result. In January of 2019 (freshmen year) I decided that my current strategy wasn't working. They also started making the peer tutors fill out behavioral checklists for their student(s) by grading them on how well they behaved/followed directions and gave them badges that say "peer tutor" which made me feel singled out. Because of that the peer tutors felt more like babysitters then someone that is an equal. So I went to my special ed teacher and asked him to remove the paraprofessional and the peer tutors. He told me no and said that I needed them. I changed my strategy again and I was going to ask for the Peer Tutors to be gone first, then focus on removing the paraprofessionals. I was more concerned about the peer tutors over the paraprofessionals because I was concerned that since they were part of the student body that this was going to affect me when I was running for the student council. I was worried that they'd tell others I was special needs then people would think I was incompetent. So every 2 weeks I would ask him again to remove them and each time he would give me a different excuse on why I couldn't be alone. Here's some of the excuses he gave me: "The peer tutors need to be there to collect data", "You need to prove that you can do the work yourself", "It's not up to me. It's the general education teacher that decides if you need a peer tutor or an aide", "Peer Tutors are supposed to represent a trainer for a job. If you refuse training then you're going to get fired". I brought it up again during my yearly IEP which took place in March. Once again my teacher said no, bringing up another excuse. As far as I can remember, my parents were neutral about the aide situation. Later one peer tutor was removed, what happened is that the peer tutor moved to a different town and they didn't bother on sending a substitute. A win is a win so I celebrated it. At the end of my freshman year I was pretty much defeated and didn't achieve the goal of being 100% independent. Over the summer I took a look at my situation and decided that my current plan is not working. I knew that when my sophomore year of high school starts I will have aides and peer tutors in classes. I knew that if I wanted to get what I wanted I would have to do something big. I knew that I would have to put up a fight, and put in a lot more effort. Over the summer I developed a war mindset inspired by two quotes from Sun Tzu:
"Victorious warriors win first and then go to war, while defeated warriors go to war first and then seek to win”
“If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.”
I knew that I can't be going into sophomore year blind, so I started drafting a plan. I created a Google doc outlining my goals and what I wanted to accomplish. I knew that I won't be able to win every battle and that I need to choose which fight is worth fighting for. I thought to myself, “Well the peer tutors we're given training on the first day of school and probably have strategies to deal with poor behavior but what about planned well organized protests?” So I began researching strategies on how paraprofessionals/peer tutors dealt with negative behavior and reverse engineered those tactics. I read forms, I Watched YouTube videos and found as much information that I could find. For the peer tutors I didn't know too much about them. I didn't know if it was something that only my school did or if other schools did it. I did some research and found out that other schools had a peer tutor program and some have uploaded training videos on YouTube. Some peer tutors told me that they did babysitting and did nanny work so I looked up babysitting tips. I reverse engineered all of those tactics and came up with strategies to counter those techniques and put all that information that I learned into a google doc that I can use for future reference. During this time I also researched how to become a better negotiator and started learning a little bit of psychology. The plan was to first negotiate and if that doesn't work I will protest and make demands and negotiate. Over the summer I got really good at negotiating and practiced a lot on my father and my sister (they were totally oblivious). To this day I use those negotiating tactics. After I created my document and was satisfied with all the information, I went to bed that night and knew that I have already won and that my sophomore year will be my last year that I 1-1 peer tutor or aide.
Fast forward to the first day of school, as expected I had peer tutors and aides assigned to me in classes. My sped teacher had a chalkboard On the back wall full of sticky notes that had everyone's schedules and a name of someone was assigned to that student for each class. This time around I only had one peer tutor outside of the special ed classes. This is a big improvement over the three I had before but I still have my original goal of having none. For the paraprofessionals I had 2 in Gen classes.The goal was to first remove the peer tutors then the paraprofessionals. Even though this seems to be an improvement I continued with the plan. Since this was the first day, the peer tutors were in another classroom learning policies and other stuff they needed to know so I was alone for the day. I walked over to my special ed teacher and ask him one final time to remove the peer tutor he says no and then I asked him to let me be alone for 2 weeks so I can prove I don't need help and he still denies me. I then tell him that I will allow the peer tutor for 2 weeks and after that she needs to go. My teacher doesn't respond. (To add context the peer tutor that I had, she was a peer tutor in my math class in the prior semester so I already know who she was. We used to talk a lot and was surprised when I saw that she was assigned to me.)
For 2 weeks she mostly left me alone with her occasionally checking up on me. For those 2 weeks I purposely close my self off and adopted a body language that would subconsciously discourage her from approaching me. I did this by keeping my head low and staying as focused as possible. The only thing she did was confront me when I start packing up 2 minutes before the bell rings. She tells me that I shouldn't be packing up and to pull my stuff out again. I tell her no and hold my ground. She writes in my planner that I packed my stuff up early and refuse to pull it out. That happened like 2 or 3 times. On Thursday on the second week my class was tasked to create a PowerPoint. FYI this was a mythology class, while I was doing this PowerPoint I decided instead of manually trying to type in the locations and people from this mythology which the names were very long and complicated. I decided would be easier just to copy and paste them in. My peer tutor sees me doing this and doesn't say anything. At the end of class she writes that I plagiarized in my planner and tells my special ed teacher in person what happened. My sped teacher pulls me out of class (I had his math class right after mythology) and starts telling me that my peer tutor has seen me copy and pasting paragraphs and goes on this lecturing on why plagiarizing is bad. I explained to him that I wasn't copying paragraphs It was only copying names and locations and explain my reason for it. He didn't believe me but he didn't make me retake the assignment. After that I was pissed off and the next day I confronted her about it. I forgot what her reasoning for not telling me was but I told her that she needs to look into things before she makes false reports. After that incident, I decided to wait a week before I ask my teacher to remove her. Also during those first 3 weeks I turned down help from peer tutors and paras if possible In the special ed classroom. I did this to prevent sending any mix signals. I personally didn't mind if I had to work with a peer tutopara or not In the actual sped classroom. I only cared if it was in any of the general education classes. I just thought it would look contradictory if I was accepting help in the sped class and then requesting peer tutors to be removed from my gen classes.
At the beginning of the fourth week I went to school early and went to my sped teacher's class before first hour starts and then I again asked him to remove the peer tutor and the paraprofessionals. He says no again and brings up that I was being academically dishonest by plagiarizing. I tell my side of the story once again on what happened and he still doesn't believe me. At this point I leave and more pissed off. At this point negotiations didn't work so I started small protests by preventing the peer tutors from filling out my planer and the behavioral checklist. Most of them didn't care since there was other students they can fill out and they only need to fill out one to be graded for the day. One peer tutor gave me the puppy dog eye treatment and I eventually cave and let her fill it out. I still let the one peer tutor that was assigned to me in the gen class due to me being the only student and my intention wasn't to ruin, her grade. During the fourth week I began brainstorming ideas on how I can do a massive protest.
On Thursday of the fourth week of school, a walk into the mythology class and it started out like any other day. Class started and my teacher starts talking. I pull up my phone to respond to some messages and my peer tutor sees me. She asks me to hand my phone over to her and I tell her no. She tells me that I can't be on my phone and I tell her okay but I'm still not giving it to you. She then pulls out her phone and puts it on the table. She then tells me to put my phone on the table. I tell her no again. A few minutes past and the teacher finishes up talking. She passes the assignment and immediately my peer tutor begins to try and help by reading the questions. I slide the packet over closer to me and start ignoring her. I was hoping that she will get the hint and leave me alone. She doesn't so put on my hoodie and tried to mentally block her out. I don't remember what she said during all this since I was blocking it out but I do remember her touching me and the general ed teacher coming over and start assisting the peer tutor. It was a lot of pressure and I was actually about to give up because it was too much. But they both gaved up before I did and I was very relieved. After that, the class was pretty much quiet. The peer tutor wrote an entire paragraph on what happened. I walked to my math class and sat down. I then see my peer tutor walking into class and ask for my sped teacher. I already knew it was about me. I see them talk for 2 minutes and sure enough I see my teacher calling me over. I walked outside the classroom and me and the teacher begin to go at it. We end up saying the same things we have said before. However, my teacher this time mentioned that if I keep up my behavior that he's going to call in a meeting with my parents. The rest of math class was pretty much the same. However, my English class with the same teacher he went on a rant about using accommodations seeing that he had a disability growing up which was tourette's and he were love to have a peer tutor. I was quiet for the whole class since I was already exhausted because of everything else that had already happened. For the rest of the weekend, I've been coming up with plans on how I would be able to pull off a massive protest.
Now for the good news. On the fifth week of school, I noticed that my peer tutor was missing. My teacher pulled me aside again and told me that he decided that he was going to pull her for 2 weeks to see how well I would do without her. I told him thank you, that's what I wanted since the beginning of the school year. After those 2 weeks he didn't reinstate her and I didn't have a peer tutor or paraprofessionals in gen classes since. The deal moving forward was as long as I had a D or better he wasn't going to send any support unless I asked for it. My relationship with that sped teacher also had improved significantly. Later in my Junior year of high school I ran in my school's election and won. I was given the social media position.
In hindsight, I'm glad I didn't have to pull off a big protest. But the same time I wish that this situation could have ended in a different way.
Everything that I just told you is only the tip of the iceberg. There's so much detail that I had to leave out just to make this story shorter. Lot of it I'm still processing even though I found great strength in myself fighting back against a system that I believe was ruining my life. That war mindset hasn't left my mentality yet. I'm still dealing with the consequences of me being in special ed. Everything I told you happened 5 years ago and I'm still living through it like it just happened. I'm mentally recovering and eventually I will recover. Right now I'm in therapy and I'm writing down everything I can in a Google doc to process everything emotionally. Maybe one day I'll give that story to a writer and make a book out of it.
If you have any questions feel free ask them, I would love to answer them.

Demographics

• Gender: Male
• Race/Ethnicity: Indian
• Residence: Massachusetts
• Income Bracket: Upper Middle Class
• Type of School: Mediocre Public school
• Hooks: Immigrant but US Citizen
• Intended Majors & Minors: Applied Math, AI, Entrepreneurship, Engineering & Computer Science

Academics

• GPA (UW/W): 4.0/4.6
• Rank (or percentile): 8/300
• Classes: 12 APs, 3 Dual-Enrolments
• Senior Year Course Load: 3 APs (Computer Science, Chemistry, Psychology) 3 Dual-Enrolments (MIT OCW Linear Algebra, MIT OCW Multivariable Calc, English), Teacher Assistant for Calculus and Teacher Assistant for AP Physics C

Standardized Testing

• SAT: 1570 (770RW, 800M)
• AP Exams: Calculus AB (5), Physics 1 (5), Statistics (5), World History (5), Physics C: Mechanics (5), Calculus BC (5), AP CSP (4), US History (4), Lang (3)
• AMC 12: 136.5 (Top 200)

Awards/Honors

• Coca-Cola Scholar (150 Selected from 100K+)
• Harvard Guest Speaker on AI & ChatGPT in Education (6K+ Listeners). The Harvard Gazette wrote an article on me.
• MIT Hackathon 3rd place winner 2x (AI Recipe Generator & AI Therapist)
• Presented at International Education & Social Justice Conference (Peer-reviewed) at University of Hawaii
• MIT LLCipher Summer Program (3% Acceptance Rate). Invited back as Guest Speaker the following year.
• Wrote Boston Globe Article on AI & ChatGPT in Education
• AMC 12 Distinction (2x) and AIME Qual (2x)
• President's Volunteer Service Gold Award
• AP Scholar with Distinction & AP Scholar with Honor
• Multiple other Math Competition, Model UN, and Marching Band Awards

Extracurriculars/Activities

• MIT Lincoln Laboratory Summer Intern: Advanced Research in AI & Networking (1% Acceptance Rate). Internship primarily for Grad and Undergrad students. Received a return offer for summer before college.
• Writer: 110+ articles on Medium with 200K+ reads. Published by the Boston Globe and other publications.
• Antarctic Research: Climate Research and Data Analysis at UW-Madison.
• MA State House Internship: Worked for State Rep. Wrote a policy brief on AI. Promoted to Campaign Manager in 2024.
• Math Team Coach & Captain: Coach students and top scorer. 4x Regional Champions (First time in history). 2x AIME qual and 2x AMC Distinction (AMC Score: 136.5).
• Students of Color Affinity Group President: Mentor students and lead professional development workshops; presented at International Education & Social Justice Conference at University of Hawaii.
• AP Physics C & Calculus Teacher Assistant: Help teach 70+ seniors at my school (ran out of classes hence TA lol).
• Model UN President: Perfect record and multiple awards at regional conferences.
• Karate Black Belt: 10+ years and help teach classes.
• Marching Band: 2nd in USBands Nationals (3x).
• Coding Instructor: Taught kids how to code in Python and JavaScript.
• Sales Head & Data Analyst at National STEM Honor Society: Promoted STEM education to underrepresented populations.
• JV Tennis: Doubles Player

Letters of Recommendation

• AP Calculus Teacher
• Math Department Head and Physics TeacheMath Team Coach
• MIT Lincoln Lab Research Mentor (MIT Alum)
• Diversity, Inclusion, and Equity Director of my school (Harvard Alum)
• Massachusetts State Representative

Essay Summaries

• Common App: During the pandemic, I found personal growth and a deeper understanding of myself and society through writing, which led me to explore artificial intelligence and its applications, culminating in an internship at MIT and advocacy work, and inspiring my entrepreneurial ambitions.
• Community Disruption: When the pandemic disrupted my activities, I leveraged online platforms to continue learning and leading, discovering new interests in AI and entrepreneurship, and demonstrating resilience by revitalizing my school’s clubs and engaging in new ventures, setting the stage for my future in innovation.
• Additional Information: Links to various articles and videos, and other activities and awards.
• Supplementals: Some were very reflective about my identity, activities, and goals in life. Others were light-hearted and quirky. They were very personalized to the school and emphasized how I fit in, what I would bring to the school, and how I would use the school as a catalyst for my entrepreneurial ventures.
• Additional Uploads: Uploaded my Resume, portfolio of Articles, and a summary of my Research at MIT Lincoln Lab.

Interviews

• Harvard (REA): Great Conversation and said Harvard would have to fight MIT for me. 9/10
• MIT: My Interviewer was very disinterested and didn't care. It was 15 minutes and he said if I don't get in then who would. 6/10
• Princeton: It was a great conversation and said he would fight for me. 8/10
• Yale: It was also a good conversation and she said she would fight for me. 8/10
• UPenn M&T: Guy kept asking technical questions and I was lost. But in the end, he said I did good and he would fight for me, even though interviews don’t matter too much. 7/10
• Dartmouth: Lady was super impressed and said if I don’t get in then she is quitting doing interviews for Dartmouth. 9/10

College Results
Accepted

• WPI (with Max Scholarship, Half off)
• UW-Madison
• Northeastern (with Max Scholarship, Half off)
• Georgia Tech for CS (Early Action)
• Cornell (Meinig Family Cornell National Scholar)
• Dartmouth
• Duke
• UPenn (Waitlisted M&T)
• Harvard (Waitlisted → Accepted)
• Princeton (Committed)

Waitlisted

• UMich (Early Action)
• Vanderbilt

Rejected

• USC (lol)
• Yale
• Stanford
• MIT (This one hurt)

Reflections:
I'm super grateful and happy with my decisions. I have committed to Princeton, and it definitely is the best fit for me. College results this year were very random, but I couldn’t be more thankful to get into the #1 undergraduate university. I was worried that since most of my application was MIT-related (Research, classes, Letters of Rec, Awards, Activities), other universities would think I was going there and reject me. College results were super random and stressful, but it worked out better than I could have ever imagined. It's funny how I got waitlisted and rejected from all my target schools (Vandy, UMich, USC) but then got into most of my reach schools.
Advice for Future Applicants:
Be authentic. There is no formula that gets you in. Sure, you have to do a couple of things like getting good grades and SAT scores and having some unique activities and awards, but especially for Top 10 schools, you just have to be unique and authentic. I didn't have any connections or background (like private school and college counselor) that provided me with opportunities. I was literally the first kid ever from my school to get into Princeton. I was authentic and hardworking, did stuff I enjoyed, and one thing led to another. I also spent a lot of time on essays and my application. 50% of the work is actually doing stuff, and the other 50% is showcasing it in your college application. Also, have balance in life. I had a lot of fun in high school and enjoyed the stuff I did. Live life with no regrets. Feel free to DM me.

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Edited by WaveOfWire
- - - - -
Two days… It had been two days that Tracy had gone to sleep while Harrison was working, only to come back in the morning to see him still in the workshop. She knew he was damn productive, sure, but that really couldn’t be healthy. Apparently, it had something to do with the weird bowl of orange… soup… that Cera gave him. No way was it just caffeine; any amount of the stuff would have been filtered out of his system by now. He mentioned a tingling feeling too…
Damn, she did not know enough about drugs to even start assuming what that massive alien had Harrison fucked up on. At least the scanner said he was ‘fine’—if you ignore the other glaring issues the machine brought up. Plus, he said he didn’t mind it. Either way, he managed to complete the weaving component and a few other electrical backbones of the fabricator last night, so the project was practically done, and after seeing the engineer work himself half to death, she was dead-set on finishing it.
She was currently tits-deep into the upper manufacturing portion of the towering machine. It took a tall step-stool—on top of the nearby desk—for her to push her small shoulders through the even smaller access panels high on the everything-printer. It was difficult to fit her torso in, but she managed, holding a flashlight between her teeth as she fiddled with a stubborn series of mechanical ‘hands.’ Nothing new. The situation reminded her of the ‘shop back on Mars; it had the same ever-present scent of copper and industrial sealant. All that was missing was her dad’s ancient tunes blasting through some shitty speakers… Hold on…
The modular component in her grip was successfully attached with a resonating thock. Tracy squirmed out of the dim wire-filled crevice, trying her best to not rip her only tank-top on any bolts or corners, and getting a face-full of the bright flood-lights illuminating the workshop. She scowled and blocked out the searing light with a hand, but she was a bit too late to avoid going half-blind.
“Are the mechanical manipulators in?” Harrison grunted, poking his head out underneath the printer’s floor-adjacent maintenance hatch. She looked down at him as she tried to blink off the spots in her vision. His hair was messy, barely kept in line by his habit of combing through it with his fingers. The areas around his eyes were dark and sunken… Guess that’s what two all-nighters did to a man. He’d be seeing the hat man or start hallucinating if he didn’t get any sleep soon… but then again, the two of them were so close to finishing the fabricator…
“You bet.” She gave him a thumbs up, slamming the panel cover closed. “Feel free to test it.”
He nodded and slid back underneath the machine. “Gotcha”
She gently stepped off the stool and slid off the side of the desk, stretching herself out. If her piss-poor sitting posture or her tank-top puppies hadn’t already fucked her spine up, bending over backward to build this fabricator sure as hell would. She sat down next to the panel where Harrison resided, resting her back against the fabrication tower. Her excited voice broke the muffled noises of the engineer’s work. “So… Harrison?”
“Hmm—”
“—Mind if I play some music?”
The sounds from the hatch stopped, followed by his muffled, shocked tone echoing from beneath the fabricator. “You have music!?”
She smirked at seeing the expression on his face when his head popped out again. “I sure do… Did you seriously not download any to your data pad?”
He slipped out from beneath the fabricator fully, huffing as he took a knee beside her. The scent of melded rubber, wire, and his liquid labor reached her nose not-so-unpleasantly. “You would not believe how much of a pain it is to repair an entire barracks without it… So, yeah, I didn’t.”
“Sooooooooo, whatcha wanna listen to? I’ve got almost everything on here—besides the super niche, of course.” She pulled her data pad out, swiping to the massive music folder
“You wouldn’t like the kinda music I listen to; It’s ancient.”
She gave him a lighthearted, annoyed glare. “Welcome to the club… Now what’ll it be?”
“It’s Old Earth kind of ancient… but alright” He looked up at the ceiling in thought, lips pursed. “Do you have anything from Styx or Sweet?”
She stared at him incredulously, her smirk turning into a fully-fledged smile. “Oh my God. You are an absolute dork! You actually listen to Golden Age music?”
His brows raised, accusatory. “And you somehow know exactly who those bands were and what age of Old Earth music they came from?”
She smugly leaned in closer. “That’s because I’m just as much of a nerd with that kinda music as you apparently are.” She quickly looked upward, addressing the workshop AI. “Sebas, connect nearby speakers to my data pad’s audio.” Tracy elbowed the engineer lightly as the PA system chirped its affirmation. “Now, Mr. Golden Age music, which albums do ya want me to queue up?”
- - - - -
The two of them listened to music for hours, tossing on songs they liked as they came to mind while they worked. Harrison had a ton of recommendations that spanned all over the Golden Ages and some twenty-first century classics. She didn’t even know half of them, but she was vibing either way, adding on her own taste by intermingling some older rock tracks and newer electronic beats. The playlist was steadily built up as the day went on. Thank God her dad showed her a vast array of tunes; she might not have been able to keep up with the engineer if her old man hadn't.
It made the work go by so fast, their conversations blurring as they jumped from topic to topic. They discussed whatever came to mind—old hobbies, old jobs, and old interests. A lot was left behind in Sol… At least she knew that the only other human on the planet was more interesting than a soulless workaholic. It turned out that he was a pretty big history buff, and he apparently read a lot about the colonization of the Sol system and the various wars of independence thereafter. Curious, she asked where the interest stemmed from, and he explained that his grandfather was an admiral in the Slavic-Europan deep-ice submarine fleet, which explained how Harrison’s mother was able to afford to immigrate to Mars from Europa.
He could also play an acoustic guitar, and, unfortunately for Tracy, he wasn’t even the slightest bit interested in printing one out, citing that it was a waste of time and material that would be better used elsewhere. That didn’t stop her from writing a note on her data pad to do so later, though. She hadn’t seen someone play one of those in years—the last time was probably in some old music video from the early twenty-second century. What a shame. She would have liked to hear some of the Europan songs his grandmother taught him.
On the bright side, the man seemed to take an interest in her odd hobbies. He brought up the folder of 3D models that she accidentally uploaded to the inter-module system and asked where she got the inspiration for what was in it. Boy, was he not ready for her ‘WarHalberd40k’ lore dump. Props to the guy for not standing up and leaving the workshop throughout her rambling. He even asked questions about the different factions and their weapons, which she was more than happy to talk about.
She also ended up going over the other franchises and hobbies she was interested in, such as robotics and the like. The only interruptions to their chat were the occasional Akula or Craftsman asking for insight regarding the various tasks he had allotted to them, or Shar coming in to check up on Harrison between guard shifts.
The new dynamic of the group was pretty interesting, to say the least. Tracy hadn’t been out to interact with the whole lot of Malkrin, but she definitely noticed how they treated the engineer. They’d started to look up to him in a way ever since he started showing off technology. In a little over two days, the man had shown them that he could provide the materials for a brick house, fine clothing—especially by the alien’s standards—armor, and delicious food. That wasn’t even mentioning the other benefits the technician heard a few of the ‘banished’ talking about over their meals: heating, electric lights, and other assorted machines.
She’d be feeling pretty happy about herself if she was in his position, having so many look up to him and be grateful at the same time. He seemed to view it a lot more robotically, however, only striving to get the basics done. Luckily for him, his basics were their luxury.
That wasn’t all there was to the topic; the engineer lamented about how the colony was going through food just as quickly as materials. The meals weren’t the direct issue he had, more that he had to start focusing on long-term resource harvesting rather than directly preparing for a literal horde of monsters—which wasn’t exactly ideal. It was a good thing that they just so happened to take on an influx of Malkrin then…
Either way, they finally finished the ‘totally legal modification’ for the fabricator, meaning they could at least partially address the latter half of his worries. The whole process of ripping out an old printer and replacing the parts for a new one felt a lot easier than she imagined… even if it took her at least forty-eight hours to complete it… with help from Harrison. Maybe that was why it felt so easy… She supposed the colony overseers didn’t choose the man for no reason, so his skills made sense.
“So… what do we want to print out first?” Tracy questioned, having finished testing the last major component.
The engineer stretched his arms up into the air and rotated his shoulders, then pulled back the desk’s chair and took a seat. “I’ve had just one thing in mind since the start of this whole project.”
Her brows raised in a mix of excitement and curiosity. She leaned forward, looking at the computer monitor from over his shoulder. “Oh? What’s that, then?”
A smirk formed along his cheek, the computer mouse rapidly clicking through the blueprint folder. “I’ve had a lot of time to think about what kind of firearm we need since I started dabbling in belt-fed weapon systems.” He opened one final file, a short loading bar preceding the exploded assembly view of… “An M2 Browning machine gun. It’s more than powerful enough to kill in one shot, while also being capable of fully-automatic fire, with a capacity of however many rounds we want in a belt-box.”
“Uh…huh…” She gave a skeptical nod and took a step back, not exactly sold on the idea. “It looks ancient. It’s kinetic, right? Why aren’t we using energy-based weapons? Don’t we have a gunpowder shortage coming up?”
He moved his chair off to the side to look back at her. “We just can’t; Simple as. We’ll need who knows how many more AI cores before we can get started on that level of equipment, Trace,” he huffed, returning his gaze to the specifications of the firearm. “This isn’t the most ‘modern’ weapon we can make, but its twenty-first century counterpart helps with an improved design… somewhat. And, as I said before, it should be more than capable of killing a bug in one shot, so Shar can just tap-fire it to save ammunition.”
Her head tilted quizzically. “Shar?”
“Yup,” he returned confidently. “It’s the perfect weapon for her.”
She raised a brow. “How so?”
He held his hand up, counting his reasons on his fingers. “She’s always on the front line with a shield, she can absolutely handle the weight and recoil, her four arms make reloading it simple, plus she’ll need something with range and power that isn’t a spear. So, why not? And, if for some reason, she doesn’t want to use it, we can just convert it into a turret—which is something I was planning on doing anyways with however more M2s we print out later.”
“I doubt she’ll say no to any gun you give her,” Tracy chuckled while shaking her head, inadvertently causing her bangs to cover her eyes.
“Fair enough,” he conceded with a bob of his head. “What do you think, then? What kinda weapons do you have in mind?”
She reapplied her goggles into an impromptu hairband, feeling a smirk cross her face. “Thought you’d never ask. What purpose do we need these guns to fulfill? Hordes I’m guessing?”
“That’s the idea, yeah. That doesn’t mean they all need to be machine guns, though.” He tapped the belt-fed shotgun beside him.
“Well, lemme see what we’re working with first.” She suddenly stepped forward, leaning over Harrison’s seat to access the keyboard and mouse. Her arms briefly rubbed against him, forcing him to roll his chair backward. She suppressed a giggle at seeing his incredulous frown.
Her eyes quickly traced the hundreds of individual files, clicking through all sorts of folders, each arranged from pre-twenty-first century ‘antiques,’ to more modern iterations of kinetics and particle weaponry. There was… a lot on there—almost too much to reasonably comb through. Why? Did the colony overseers just say ‘fuck it’ and put whatever they could find on here? Were they expecting the pioneers to make a museum of everything?
She sighed, standing up straight and facing Harrison. “Y’know, I’m actually impressed you managed to find that M2-whatever in there…”
He shifted in his seat, resting an elbow on the desk. “Yup, there’s a lot. I’m almost tempted to just make several of those machine guns and just call it a day, but I feel like that’d be too much of a strain on resources, no?”
“I don’t really know enough about how you fight those spider-crab things, or how to get more gunpowder, so… maybe?” She shrugged, biting her cheek in contemplation. “You might just wanna make a few smaller caliber weapons… like, uh… those old kinetic service rifles. If your pump-action shotgun works fine, I’m sure some normal guns would work just fine for now, right?”
He hardily gripped his firearm, hauling it up to his lap. “Depends on what you mean by ‘smaller caliber.’ The whole reason why the KS-23 here works—” he pulled out a massive shell from the ammo belt, displaying it on his palm. “—is because the twenty-three-millimeter round has enough energy transfer to mess up any bug's shell and insides. I’d say the smallest rounds we could use would be point-two-forty-three caliber to get any similar results.”
Brief flickers of grungy orange shells and gnashing teeth marred Tracy’s sight. She forcibly suppressed them, distracting herself with dry humor and a strained laugh. “Guess those fuckers can really take a punch, huh?”
He shook his head somberly. “I couldn’t imagine going up against them without a gun… Anyway, I like your idea of a standard rifle for now. Then, when we have some product lines up, we can go a little more in depth into personal weapons.”
“So are you gonna take one?” She hopped up on the desk, letting her legs swing off the side.
“Don’t think so, no. I’ll stick with my shotty.” The internals of the heavily modified weapon rattled as he held it up and inspected it. “Doesn’t mean I’ll keep it as is. I’m thinking of printing a laser aiming module so I can point-fire it accurately, and maybe a melee-oriented muzzle brake or a lighter chassis to reduce weight… Not sure though.”
She leaned forward and rested her elbows on her knees, her cheeks in her palms. “Melee-oriented? Oooooh, like a chain-sword or something?”
His short chuckle coerced a smirk to her face. “No, not like that. More something to use as a bludgeoning tool. Right before the blood-moon, I ended up getting just as much use out of this shotgun as a hammer than as a… well, a shotgun.”
“That’s pretty fuckin’ metal. So are you just gonna make the barrel into a giant bayonet?”
He nodded. “Not exactly a bayonet, but something more like a door-breaching break.”
A short silence settled on their conversation, the faint sounds of the fabricator’s hum and distant woodwork coming to light. Right, there was an outside world… She’d been too caught up talking to Harrison for however many hours it had been. She wondered how successful the fisherwomen were in collecting, and how things had been for the others working on the wood storage shack. Maybe it was already completed? The sun peered through the cargo bay door, proving that it was only about midday. What else would they work on today?
“Hey,” she ventured.
“Hm?” the engineer hummed, his eyes focused on the monitor beside the technician.
She scooted closer to his keyboard. “What’re we doing after this?”
“What do you mean?”
She leaned backward, propping herself up on two hands. “Project wise; what’s the next big thing?”
“Uhmmm…” he muttered, interacting with the computer for a few more seconds before finally meeting her gaze. “Well, I’ve just allocated the fabricator to print out the M2, three FALs—wood furniture, of course—then there’s the magazines and ammunition, so we’ve got a lot of time to kill. The next big thing is definitely going to be metal procurement, and— Oh, right!” Harrison stopped mid-sentence, reaching into his backpack and pulling out several finger-sized metallic cubes, a sudden fire in his eyes. “Okay, so a while ago, during an encounter with three colossi, Shar and Akula found a cave with some ‘surface’ metal deposits. I took a piece off to analyze, but never got the chance to until last night. Anyway, we don’t have any machines to examine the ore, so I made use of the recycler and broke it down to its baser components.”
She nodded along, seeing where he was going with his explanation. “I’m guessing those shiny cubes are the metals from the ore?”
“Sure is. So, as it turns out, we have a pretty damn close supply of not only iron, but also, zinc, sulfur, and a small amount of cadmium. I talked with Sebas about it and did a little research. We believe it’s something akin to sphalerite, given its composition and looks, which implies it’s a sedimentary exhalative deposit. That means there must have been some volcanic…”
Harrison continued talking about underwater deposits and ancient rock formations, bringing up some theories brought forward by the now 4-AI-core-powered Sebas, delving into the current land mass’ history and possible ore output. A lot of it went over the tradewoman’s head, but she still listened intently… Honestly, she could have listened to the man talk about finding metals for hours. It was sort of like the podcasts she used to listen to while completing colonist training, but even more personal and somehow easier to get lost in…
“…find some other minerals further down like silver, but it also might be an active lava zone. Again, these are all theories and this world could just throw the fundamentals of geology away as it does for physics. Anyway, sorry for going on for so long about that, just thought it’d be important for getting some metals in the future.”
“No, no,” Tracy assured, alleviating him of concern with a wave of her hand. “If there’s anything the colony overseers emphasized, it was farming and mineral acquisition. Don’t worry.” She smiled, pointing a thumb to herself. “I just wanna know how I can help.”
“Actually, I’ve a few things only you can do. I’d like to make use of your impressive drone-making expertise for a few applications, if you don’t mind.”
The task of keeping eye contact slipped into an impossible feat in the span of a singular second, planting a pang of embarrassment on her reddened face, forcing her to inspect her fidgeting hands. “I-I wouldn’t say ‘impressive’… b-but what do you have in mind?”
She could see him raise a brow out of the corner of her vision. “Well, after what you’ve shown me with the reconnaissance flyers, I’d like your help in setting up a more permanent ‘net’ of them to scour the meadow and parts of the nearby forest to look out for any approaching hordes. I don’t want to be snuck up on… again…”
‘Again.’
She noted his small frown and sunken eyes, both a little more exaggerated than they already were. It wasn’t like she’d deny his request, but the pangs of empathy over their shared situation all but solidified her resolve. It was the least she could do. She could help him. She would help him.
The technician exhaled slowly, taking on a more serious and understanding tone than before. “I… can do that. For sure. What else?”
“I appreciate it.” He gave a wane smile. “I’ll help you with whatever you need for the project. For the other drones, I’m thinking about a small exploration vehicle to map out caves around us and mark any minerals, as well as a submersible to look for potassium deposits in the ocean.”
“So… search bots?” She crossed her arms, confidence growing; those were her specialty. “Depending on how long the fabricators take and what kind of base drones are in the blueprint folders, I should be able to get those done in no time. All I need to know are the search cues for potassium and how many drones you want.”
He quickly shuffled a few folders on the computer, turning the monitor for her to see some scientific documents with various images and walls upon walls of text. “There’re plenty of resources for that on here for what to look for, and there’s always Sebas, so feel free to ask him since he can just sort through the data for you anyway. If you can, I’d like it if you could focus on the submersible after the reconnaissance drones.”
“Sounds good to me. I’ll be right on it, then.” She gave him a thumbs up, slipping off his desk and toward her own.
“I’ll bring you lunch in a bit. Imma go check on the others,” he called.
Her stomach grumbled at the mention, her head turning to give him an appreciative smile. “Oh! Thanks!”
\= = = = =
Avian creatures chirped from their perches in the trees nearby. The wind softly rustled red leaves as grass gently gave way to calculated footfalls. A warm sun laid its light on Shar’khee’s neck. It was surprisingly pleasant, were one to take the time to notice. The mainland was a confusing place for the paladin, with its disparate representations of nature contrasting so heavily. Some days were filled with blood and ravenous beasts, while others were left within the domain of simplicity and beauty. She was content to have the latter, yet it felt like a facade veiling the former—a soft exterior covering the maliciously spiked interior. Never could she leave herself to carelessness, no matter how welcoming it might be.
Hence why she worked to ensure the safety of the star-sent’s castles and their inhabitants, her days largely spent patrolling for any roaming swarms that may wish to cause them harm. She typically used the routine to think, but today offered little in the way of solitude. This time, she was accompanied by the previously banished guardswoman, and was tasked with instructing the new one, though the specifics of what such lessons should entail were vague. Still, Shar’khee did all that she could so as not to disappoint Harrison, so she could only attempt to meet his expectations of her.
She told the yellow-skinned female of the threats that the settlement faced, how one was to defeat them, and what to expect from the beasts. The guardswoman was directed to practice her form with the spear in both thrusts and throwing for some time afterward, proving herself to be well-built. Such was expected of her profession after all.
It was pleasing to have another capable of patrolling the settlement’s outskirts for swarms, as it would greatly impact how effectively the colony could react to such a threat. If her routine was to suffer for the colony’s well-being, she was happy to show the new one her patrol route and note what to look out for.
The guardswoman was not a perfect student, however. Shar’khee never addressed it directly, but the yellow-skinned female obviously discredited the danger posed by the abhorrent, not-so-subtly shrugging off any warnings.
…That was until they stumbled upon the ‘hyena-boars,’ as Harrison called them.
The beasts resided in a clearing not too far from the castles, carelessly meandering across the sea of tall grass. Shar’khee quickly crouched, dragging the guardswoman down with her. Once she assessed that the creatures were not an imminent danger, she decided it would be an excellent opportunity to show the new one how to properly engage a threat. She was about to propose the idea, yet her speech was silenced just as swiftly.
Orange flashes darted through the trees around the glade. Taloned feet and gnashing teeth tore across the ground toward the unsuspecting beasts at the center. It was much too late for them. They were slow. Surrounded. Unaware. It was as quick as it was vicious, the forest’s reds turning a deeper crimson hue in a moment's notice underneath the abhorrent’s brutality.
Gangly monstrosities gnawed and ripped at the dead creatures, brief glimpses of raw flesh and white bone protruding from the small spaces between the clumped-up beasts. Repulsive wet splatters of blood and gore overlapped the calm noises of the forest, the grisly scene serenaded by the softest of nature’s symphonies. It was a sickening juxtaposition.
Shar’khee bit back the unease and steeled herself. They were within twenty paces—close enough to smell the abhorrent’s vile stench of rot and bile, yet far enough so as not to be noticed. She briefly considered backing away and retreating, her focus bouncing between the different avenues of escape, or how to cover her footst—
Crack.
Several sets of feral, eyeless maws snapped in their direction, the blood dripping off freshly dampened teeth. The guardswoman gasped, Shar’khee’s gaze following to see the mistake: a singular broken branch crinkled as a yellow-colored foot raised off the splintering twig.
The paladin exhaled sharply and smoothly stood up, brandishing two spears and her shield. Her glare settled on the still crouching guardswoman. “You are to stay behind my shield and let them appr—ch. Rem—ber what I have told you. Aim for their maws when you thrust y—r lance.”
The other female nodded, shakily pulling out her own weapons with unsteady placement hampering her grip. There was an obvious nervousness to her gaze. Hesitance. That would not do.
Shar’khee faced the prowling abhorrent her knuckles shifting hue as she prepared for their advance, for there was no chance that they wouldn’t. True to her experience, the stalking turned to a gallop with several clicks of grotesque tongues, the swarm bolting toward her as one. She snarled and slammed her bulwark into the ground, letting the approaching beasts skewer themselves amongst its spikes.
There were only ten—a paltry amount. She had defended against magnitudes more, and yet she still stood. What is more, they were mindless. Uncoordinated. They would be but stains in the cloth she used to clean her armor. Perhaps, if they were fortunate, they might leave a furrow in her shield to remember them by. Her arms tensed as the first leapt.
One by one, the abhorrent fell, their repulsive green blood splattering under her thrusts. Each awaiting corpse tore across the grove’s grass, lunging to their deaths with gaping maws and unfeeling hunger, yet she did not yield. Their shells were crushed by her shield and impaled by her Goddess-blessed spears, becoming but one more smear across their surface. Ten motionless lumps lay before her, seeping their ichor into the soil, none having passed the barrier she became. Dead, just as the Creator intended. She remained vigilant for a few moments longer, watching for any more of the disgusting creatures.
None showed themselves, finally allowing blood to flow to her fingers once again. The shield’s heavy presence weighed down her back, the blood flicked off of her spears before she returned them to their place.
“Are y–u well?” Shar’khee addressed the frozen Malkrin, wiping away the splatter on her bracers. The guardswoman stared at the small pile of deceased creatures, her heavy breaths and widened eyes moving from the spear from her singular kill. The paladin huffed. “We are fort—ate that there were so few.”
“F-Few? God help us…” Her horrified, stunned gaze slowly met the paladin’s. “Y-You said there were hundreds on the crimson nights? H-How do you… They were s-so fast.”*
”As I h–ve warned,” Shar’khee affirmed.
“You are a paladin! You all exaggerate your feats… I thought it was just a facade!”
“I have no r—son to lie,” she returned tersely, shrugging off the insult to her station and shaking her head. “The mainl—d is far more dangerous than ten gnash—g beasts; more so than that of your island hamlet. Pick yourself up. We m—t inform the others of this incursion.”
The yellow-skinned female snarled, furrowing her brows at the ground in frustration. At whom…? Shar’khee? Herself? Regardless, the female promptly gathered her composure, pushing air through clenched jaws. A step forward had her feet splash in the small pool of blood, the Malkrin nodding toward the paladin to continue back to the castles.
“…for the village.”
Shar’khee paused in her stride and faced her, frowning at the determination and anger leaking through the intent. “W—t was that?”
Her question was returned with honesty, a huffed voice marred by vexation. “Paladin, how am I to defend my village-mates as I am now?”
“‘As you are now?’ What do you m—n?”
The guardswoman stared down at her spear, wood creaking under her grip. “I have faltered before what you deem a paltry threat, and the thought of an even greater one sows dread deep within my bones. I wish… I wish to be better prepared to defend those of my village. I cannot help but see their faces on those of the furred creature in the clearing, and yet, even if I am so close, I am just as unable to protect them.”
Shar’khee stared down the yellow female, a long gaze taking in a rare showing of sincerity. “Y—r fears are one we all share, new one. Do not be ashamed of them. All t—t matters is that you do not let them rem—n mere fear, but make them your strength. So tell me, do you wish to impr—e? To ensure they do not fall while you are support—g them?”
The yellow-skinned female released a shuddering breath that bled off the worst of her indecision, a newly invoked flame flaring within her visage. “I do, paladin. I seek to protect and to be of use.”
“Then, if you wish to make y—rself resilient in the face of all that opposes us, it would be my undertak—g to forge you anew. Fortunately, Harrison has ordered such already, and his guidance shall prove ever useful, should you pursue it.”
The guardswoman shuffled in place at the star-sent’s mention, her eyes slipping downwards. “He is of a great many resources, but I would rather receive your teachings than those of a craftsman… or that of a male, deity-sent he might be.”
She placed a palm on the female’s shoulder. “He is far more than you might ever k—w. Regardless of if you ac—pt his guidance, I commend your conviction. However—” Her hand gripped tighter, though not enough to instill hostility. “—understand that you are protecting more than just your vi—age-mates.”
The new one nodded, staring up at the paladin with stallwart resolve. “Of course. I shall be in your tutelage, then.”
Shar’khee smiled. “T—n let us begin.”
\= = = = =
Akula was becoming increasingly certain that she knew how her parents once felt. The green-skinned fisherwoman was currently rotating between the many tasks placed upon her, guiding the newcomers through the minutia of their tasks so they might live up to the potential Harrison saw within them. She was gratified to have her own talents recognized by the Creator, but it also placed a great many responsibilities in her talons. Of course, she handled each new addition with finesse befitting her heritage, never once balking from the increasing demands. If anything, she felt validated; it was required of her as a female anyway, was it not? The more feminine-appropriate labor and management one undertakes, the higher authority they were granted.
It began with a simple assignment to oversee the chef’s introduction to the star-sent’s provided cooking appliances. As fascinating and convenient as utilities were, she held no interest in preparing any more food than she already had, but teaching another to operate the machines would alleviate such requirements of her. She reluctantly accepted the task when it was proposed, especially considering the fact that Harrison was much too busy with his other projects to bother with something as benign as cooking. His work was more valuable elsewhere.
The task itself went well, and the pink-skinned chef was quick to pick up on the use of the various kitchen devices, as well as the smoker. A grin had grown when she considered the possibility of all males understanding such domestic things readily, yet her mirth at removing the masculine job required of her was short-lived. Despite the newly initiated Malkrin’s success, Harrison had Akula frequently return to oversee the numerous cooking operations being conducted. That was in tandem with the back-to-back fishing trips made by both herself and the newly acquired females.
…Which was something else the green-skinned cycle-worshipper was ordered to oversee.
She had left the chef to his devices after producing another batch of partially seasoned meals, returning to the Creator with hopes of a break. He applauded her efforts with a nod and tersely spoken appreciation, then quickly pushed two spearguns into her hand and directed her to the ocean, where the twins were ‘working with jack shit,’ as the busy male said. She was to give the fisherwomen the tools and make sure they were used properly, and offer additional assistance in acquiring ‘enough fish to have us fed for a little bit.’
So, she left to complete the given task, feeling somewhat appreciative that her speargun was of superior quality to those she would be delivering—the newcomers were only afforded the lesser, roped-bolt version. It was only natural that she was in possession of their greatest assets, of course; the star-sent saw her as the only one capable of wielding such fantastic ammunition, showing trust that was rightfully placed in her. That did not mean the gray-skinned females were unsatisfied with their own gifts, however. The twins were swiftly caught up on the ‘manual of arms’ and sent to work, somehow managing to keep up with Akula in spite of their land-based origins. The two were fast enough to outpace the cycle-worshipper in sheer speed, but their lack of numerous winters spent traversing deeper waters meant they required frequent rests, breaking the ocean’s surface after every third captured fish or so.
Still, she had to appreciate their dedication to their task. They never complained about Akula pushing them further to reach the star-sent’s vague objective. Such a task was entrusted to her—and by proxy, the other two—and thus it would be completed, no matter how much her comfortable bed… couch called her tiring muscles.
The group of three hauled net after full net of fresh meat to the chef—and sewist, who later joined him—forcing him to relegate much of the catch to long-term storage as the kitchen simply could not deal with the surplus. At least three-quarters of the fish were put to slow cook in the now Malkrin-sized smoker. The craftsman had upgraded it with a kit provided by Harrison, who had recycled much of the dining room and workshop furniture to accommodate it. The Creator’s showcased urgency to gather materials was clearly not unfounded… It was admirable how he used what little he had left to ensure food would not be scarce. Additionally, the apparatus exuded an excellent scent for all the survivors to enjoy, the earthy aroma drawing in some of the other Malkrin for their breaks or meals.
Those were not the end of the cycle-worshiper’s tasks, however. She was also required to report on Shar’khee’s progress in training the guardswoman—helping to recycle the small swarm of abhorrent they cleared earlier—as well as the wood storage building’s progress. Indeed, she was advising and assisting however and wherever applicable. To say she was seen all around the settlement would be an understatement.
Nevertheless, she was appreciative to see her efforts bearing fruit by sundown. The processing of their meals from sea to plate was quite efficient, and those that Akula taught were now well-practiced in their duties. The twin fisherwomen dove from wave to wave, bringing fish back to the barracks, where the cook and sewist swiftly worked to transfer the meat to pans and smoker hooks alike. Then, the remnants of the Sea Goddess’ aquatic gifts would be subsequently recycled and given purpose anew as biofuel or perhaps future fertilizer.
The endless onslaught of duties and responsibilities had enlightened her, in a way. She could see where Harrison came from now; having a working project go from one point to another without input nor difficulty was a sight to behold, and it made her swell with pride. It was a surmountable feat to teach the barbaric ground-worshippers to do something properly.
…Well, they were not horrible Malkrin, so perhaps simply calling them ‘uninitiated’ was a more apt descriptor…
No matter the tribulations faced, and no matter how draining her new authority might be, her rest at the end of the day would be one that was well-earned, and it would be had with a sense of satisfaction. She deserved it, and perhaps that extended to the rest of the settlement as well.
- - - - -
[First] [Previous] [Next]
Next time on Total Drama Anomaly Island - Mine! Mine! Mine!

This did not happen recently but a few months back.
I was looking for a job (double digit years in experience) and a HR from Nagarro reached out on LinkedIn. I sent her my details, did a proctored online test and was selected for a 2nd round face to face. Since the interviewer was in US, the slot I had was Sunday at 9:45 PM IST [I was given a choice of slots but they were either 7 in the morning or 9-10 in the night, only weekends].
I joined the Teams meeting at 9:40 PM on a Sunday, turned on my camera, and waited 5 minutes for the interviewer. As soon as it became 9:45, I heard the Teams chime that I was let in, but before the sound ended, a voice started speaking. "Alright, so what things you take care?"
I looked up to see this Indian guy wearing a red hat (not THAT red hat) indoors, looking at me. I said, "Sorry, what?" And he said exasperatedly, "Your work. What. Is. It. that. You. Do." in clipped tones, as if I was not a mentally sound person.
My hand automatically moved my mouse over to the disconnect button and I almost clicked but stopped myself at the last moment. I decided to see how the interview went. I had not given an interview in a long time and wanted to get an experience.
I composed myself and started to explain my resume. In the middle of it, he stopped me and said, "Are you using dual screens?" I said yes. He scolded me for using dual screens for an interview and made me turn one off. I was on camera the whole time and it was a face to face interview so not really sure what the concern was but I still did it. The funny part was, during the interview I could hear pings from his side and see him turn to his own second screen to reply to some chat/IM messages. Anyways, I asked, "should I continue explaining my resume" and he said, "no that's alright."
"Tell me about any recent deliverable you have worked on", he asked next. I had recently worked on implementing a customized DR system so I started to explain how it was implemented and the architectural changes done. He was distracted the whole time, replying to some ping, constantly muting and unmuting his audio and saying, "That's fine. Keep going." I completed my explanation and waited. He realized I had stopped talking and said, "All that is good but I do not see the architecture change you have done." I summarized the server re-organization, the load balancers, the customized back-up and archival, even some code level changes we had to do, but he said, "I still do not see the architecture design change." I said, "I can draw an architecture diagram to show it clearly", and he said, "no that's alright. Let's move on."
I come from a .NET background, so he asked me, "do you have experience with .NET core?" I said, I did. And this is where the most weird part of the interview starts. He spent 20 minutes on a single question and you will see why, in a minute.
He asked me, "Do you know the three types of dependency injection?" I answered the three - singleton, scoped and transient.
He said, "good, now tell me how do you decide which one to use." This is a standard interview question, I gave the standard answer. It was not good enough.
He did a "tch" sound of exasperation. "All that is good, but how do you decide?" I explained again, adding more details.
He did that "tch" sound again. "All that is good, but how do YOU decide?", stressing on the word "YOU". I explained again, this time with examples of when I would make which choice and why.
He did that "tch" sound again. "All that is good, but those are textbook examples. Tell me about an example that you have implemented in your system"
I explained how we had used a singleton for application level settings. He did that "tch" sound again. "All that is good, but what made you decide that the application settings need to be in singleton?"
I was confused at this point. What was he looking for! "The settings need to be the same throughout the application and so a singleton is a logical choice", I said.
He shook his head, this time not making the "tch" sound. "No, you are not getting it. I want to understand what made you decide to make the application settings class a singleton? Was it because of the name of the class or because somebody told you or because you got a feeling?"
I was angry at this point, so I repeated the same answer as before. He said, "Maybe I am making it complex. Why don't I give you an example and you can explain your choice." I said OK.
"Alright, so suppose that I created a class called "" and asked you how should I use it. What will you say?"
I stared at him for a moment, wondering if this was real. I asked him what was the functionality of the class, and he launched into the most unnecessarily complex (and to me, wildly unrelated) functionality regarding uploading documents from an API to an azure storage account involving Virtual Networks, Key Vault, different Blob types and an Azure SQL database to store blob metadata. I asked him, how the class is supposed to be used. He said, "I don't know. I am the author of the class. I have given it to other people to use. Ask me questions you would ask the author of the class."
My mind was hurting at this point so I repeated, in the most bored voice, the very first standard answer I had given. He must have realized my disinterest, for he said, "Alright, I get it. Let's move on. Do you have experience writing SQL?"
I said Yes. So he asked me to share my screen and gave me a written scenario for which to write a query.
While I was working on the query, he said, "I have your resume so let's take a look at that." He opened the resume, I could see that he actually did open it then, by the screen brightness reflected on his face change. And as I worked on the query, he kept going through my resume and making what I can only describe as "Passive-Aggressive comments" in a low voice in the background. E.g. "worked at So-and-so (one of the Big 4 companies)... In ", "worked with XYZ technology... for ", "SME for ABC technologies... for DEF use case"
I was done at this point so I drafted out a query with as low effort as I could and then explained it quickly. It was wrong for sure, and not fulfilling the use case completely but I had stopped caring. He also realized it because he said, "Alright, I think that is it. Do you have any questions for me?", in a very smug voice.
I said, "No, thanks for the experience", and disconnected the call.
So, that was it. The most WTF interview of my life. So far. I am not really sure what was wrong with that dude or maybe I have been out of touch for a long time and this is how it is now, but damn, man. I sat in shock for a few minutes after the call. I did check out the interviewer's profile on LinkedIn, wondering if we had crossed paths before. But he was been with his company for a long, long time, first company since college and never switched. So I don't really know.
Anyways, so, yeah. Hope you are having a better experience than me.

FIA F2

Emilia-Romagna Grand Prix - Feature Race

F1FS Wiki: FIA F2 Guide 2024 Drivers & Teams 2024 Calendar

Session Times

Friday-Sunday times are in CEST (UTC+2:00)

• Practice: Fri 17 May 2024, 11:05 (UTC+2)
• Qualifying: Fri 17 May 2024, 16:00 (UTC+2)
• Sprint Race: Sat 18 May 2024, 14:15 (UTC+2)
• Feature Race: Sun 19 May 2024, 10:00 (UTC+2)

You can convert the session times to your local time via Timeanddate.com.
A full time table of the weekend's events can be found here: Link

Imola Circuit

Imola, Emilia-Romagna, Italy
Circuit Diagram
Length: 4.909 km (3.050 miles)
Turns: 19
Distance:

• Sprint Race: 25 laps - 122.725 km
• Feature Race: 35 laps - 171.815 km (Mandatory pit-stop)

2022

2022 Pole Time: 1:40.221 ( Juri Vips, Hitech Grand Prix)
2022 Fastest Lap:

• Sprint Race: 1:28.841 ( Juri Vips, Hitech Grand Prix)
• Feature Race: 1:28.353 ( Jehan Daruvala, Prema Racing)

2022 Winner:

• Sprint Race: Marcus Armstrong, Hitech Grand Prix
• Feature Race: Theo Pourchaire, ART Grand Prix

2024

2024 Pole Time:
2024 Fastest Lap:

• Sprint Race:
• Feature Race:

2024 Winner:

• Sprint Race:
• Feature Race:

Provisional Starting Grid

The Formula 2 page on FIA.com
—-

Live Timing & Streaming

The FIA F2 championship has its own official Live Timing services.

• Live Timing: Here.
• List of Broadcasting Channels: Here

F1FS Guide

New to FIA Formula 2? You can read our dedicated guide HERE, or watch our video guide from 2019 HERE!

Twitter & Discord

For up to date information regarding this series, follow these Twitter accounts:

• FIA F2 Twitter: @Formula2
• F1FS Twitter: @F1FeederSeries

We have a Discord server for the subreddit, check it out here: Link

On-Demand Race Replays

You can access previous races of this series and more here: F1FS Race Replays

Championship Standings

Full championship standings here: Link

FIA Formula 3 Emilia-Romagna Grand Prix - Feature Race

F1FS Wiki: FIA Formula 3 Guide 2024 Drivers & Teams 2024 Calendar

Session Times

Friday-Sunday times are in CEST (UTC+2:00)

• Practice: Fri 17 May 2024, 09:55 (UTC+2)
• Qualifying: Fri 17 May 2024, 15:05 (UTC+2)
• Sprint Race: Sat 18 May 2024, 10:05 (UTC+2)
• Feature Race: Sun 19 May 2024, 08:30 (UTC+2)

You can convert the session times to your local time via Timeanddate.com.
A full time table of the weekend's events can be found here: Link

Imola Circuit

Imola, Emilia-Romagna, Italy
Circuit Diagram
Length: 4.909 km (3.050 miles)
Turns: 19
Distance:

• Sprint Race: 18 Laps - 88.362 km
• Feature Race: 22 Laps - 107.998 km

2022

2022 Pole Time: 1:41.180 ( Zane Maloney, Trident)
2022 Fastest Lap:

• Sprint Race: 1:33.573 ( Ollie Bearman, Prema Racing)
• Feature Race: 1:33.129 ( Roman Stanek, Trident)

2022 Winner:

• Sprint Race: Franco Colapinto, Van Amersfoort Racing
• Feature Race: Roman Stanek, Trident

2024

2024 Pole Time:
2024 Fastest Lap:

• Sprint Race:
• Feature Race:

2024 Winner:

• Sprint Race:
• Feature Race:

Provisional Starting Grid

The Formula 3 page on FIA.com

Live Timing & Streaming

The FIA Formula 3 series has its own official Live Timing services.

• Live Timing: Here.
  
• List of Broadcasting Channels: Here
  

F1FS Guide

New to FIA Formula 3? You can watch our dedicated video guide that introduces the series HERE!

Twitter

For up to date information regarding this series, follow these Twitter accounts:

• FIA Formula 3 Twitter: @Formula3
• F1FS Twitter: @F1FeederSeries

Discord

We have a Discord server for the subreddit, check it out here: Link

On-Demand Race Replays

You can access previous races of this series here: 2024 FIA Formula 3 Championship Race Replays

Championship Standings

Full championship standings here: Link

Swoop has shared the following message on her YouTube page's community tab:
"Finally Opening Up" (link)

TW: DV, illness, MH Tldr: Recent physical as\ault and medical trauma*
Hey friends. This is the most difficult thing I’ve ever shared, but dealing with this privately for so long, while trying to put on a “brave” face has been destroying me, and fear of oversharing has left me feeling painfully disconnected from all of you, the community whom I cherish so deeply. But everything has come to a head recently, when I was violently physically assaulted, battered, and threatened by a person who has abused me in the past.
Most of you know that I am a survivor of r*pe and ab*se as a child and adult, being slowly on the journey of trying to process both publicly and privately. I’m imperfect in this journey, but trying. In addition, for most of my life, I have been living with chronic illness, spinal injuries, and chronic pain from trauma as well as fibromyalgia. And for the past 2+ years I have been living in a nightmare.
I have been living with widespread partial and total limb numbness, tingling, and electric shocks in both my arms, hands, legs, and feet, as well as deep spasms. At times it’s excruciating and would intensify without warning. It has left me with extended periods where I can’t feel parts of my body at all, while other times my body is on fire. A team of doctors had put on the “MS Protocol” meaning, my doctor, who has Multiple Sclerosis, has been evaluating me for MS. At this time I have not been officially diagnosed, while being told they cannot rule it out, and to expect a long process.
In addition, after endless MRIs and painful procedures, my doctor found white spots within my spine. I was told they have only seen this once before, where what appeared to be lesions were tumors, and they have me regularly testing for cancer, indefinitely. I do not have answers yet. This has caused a depression and level of anxiety that has felt too much to handle, so I’ve buried it deep and kept it private, even from many close to me.
On top of this, I was recently physically battered by a person who has abused me previously. I was trying to escape being cornered in a room when I was attacked from behind and tried to defend myself but it wasn’t enough. As a result, I am struggling with an immense amount of physical trauma, and mentally I’m just a shell of myself. I’m so embarrassed that after telling so many “it’s not your fault” - I still can’t tell myself.
I am neurodivergent, and get stuck in “brain loops” where I spiral into self harm and feelings of uncontrollable dread and worthlessness. I’ve tried my best to combat the loops by throwing myself in my work, even when I could hardly feel my own hands, and am left feeling massive guilt if my work feels incomplete, sloppy, out of touch or disconnected. I tried taking on projects that became too triggering, and had to walk away, riddled with shame that I might be letting anyone down for not covering a story. Everything about what I’m going through has shifted my perception of stories and how I cover them, trying to introduce more perspectives (you may or may not have noticed) and I hope to continue to develop and find more eloquent and inclusive ways to do so. Petty has always been my coping mechanism to mask my pain, but now I wish to focus more on perspective.
I have sat down countless times to film a video about my trauma, and may try to post one, the way I used to with our community. I have been keeping things private out of fear that people would think I’m “trauma dumping” or asking for sympathy. I’ve realized: that is an irrational fear and trauma response, because, like so many other survivors, I have been conditioned to feel guilty for sharing, or like I’m just looking for attention. If that’s how someone interprets me, that’s ok. But holding this has only made the darkness deeper. I no longer want to be an example of suffering in silence, in hopes someone else might feel seen.
I am also working to take some time away to find healing. I have a number of previous videos already in production from a while ago, and contractual obligations I can’t cancel, so I’ll likely have someone upload them for me, so that I can try to breathe for once, and you’re not without the content you generously spend your time with. I don’t know how much time I will or won’t take, but it’s a start. Thank you for your openness to hearing my story. I’m broken, but still here.
I feel like I’ve been fighting for my life, and this is not a battle I want to lose.
Love you all, Swoop

Please Reddit i need u to help me make my parents understand that if i put a YouTube channel on private other people can't track or even see the videos. How this all started is Today i got a new drone and i decided it would be cool to start a yt channel and make videos on it. Since it is a drone i am not going to be videoing my self and im not going to film near my house. The reason i had to go to my parents to make one is because of family link plus i just turned thirteen. I sat down and asked my dad if i could borrow his phone to go to family link and change a setting so iu could start yputubing. Then my mom comes out of nowere and says that sint safe and that there are creeps and pedophiles on there. After a few minutes of me trying to explain to my mom that it is 100% safe she still says no.I got a little upset (which probably did not help the situatoin) and i went to my room about ten minutes later i went on wikihow and asked how to get my parents to let me make a yt. Then i realized my mom is the kind of person who uses duck duck go because apparently google sells your data. So i decided on something and i hate saying this but its the best way to put it idiot proof. I told her i would keep my channel on private and that i would upload it but no one could see it. However she still said its not safe and that there are things i dont under stand. Therefore basically implying that i am a total idiot and know nothing about the real world. Then i got PISSED and stormed off to my room. The thing is that i had a YouTube channel in the past and my mom even watched the videos. So i geusse she just saw something on YouTube or Facebook telling her some bullshit the thing is that at the end of the day i still love her but i dont love some of the bullshit she believes.

[FIRST][LAST]
Atlantis Commission
Officer Report - Lieutenant Colonel John Shepard
CLEARANCE LEVEL 5
Well this had definitely been a very interesting couple of hours. This dimension and its people had very odd opinions and ideas. Apparently the prey species of this dimension were all obligate cowards, whose instincts compelled them to be non-violent and run from threats. At least according to themselves. There were apparently some of them who were “predator diseased” as they called it, a disease which often resulted in increased violence, aggression, lack of empathy, and unheard like behavior. It sounded to me like some form of infectious psychopathy, but the venlil assured us it shouldn't affect us since we were predators, which didn’t really ease my fears, but hopefully it was something we could figure out when we got home if it ever became a problem.
Gotta love mandatory quarantine periods woo hoo!
As scary as this odd disease sounded, my main concern at the moment was to try and turn a professed coward into someone who could at the very least defend themselves.
I looked down to the table of gear ahead of me and then over to the mostly naked Venlil to my side, and then even farther to Tiel’c who thought It would be a good idea to help oversee Farva’s rapid fire training course. I fiddled with the bluetooth earpiece which was rigged up to one of our handhelds to run a translation program to speak directly with the captain. A big step up from our unknowingly one sided communications earlier.
I stepped on the other side of the plastic table and placed my hands down upon it and looked on at my new student..
“Welcome Captain Farva to our very impromptu accelerated course on Human arms armor and basic infantry tactics.” I said gesturing to the hodge podge gear we had managed to assemble for the good captain. “Are we ready to begin?”.
She flicked her ears, somewhat nervously by the looks.
“I’d take it that's a yes then?”
“Oh yes sorry”
“Alright then, well given that most of our crew is human and the only other alien struts around naked all the time, the only gear we have on hand is for humans, So you're going to be running size smalls and it's all going to fit all a bit big” I say as I toss her the tactical vest. ”Here try this on, we can try to tighten it up if it's a bit loose anywhere”. The captain wrestles with the buckles a bit, and Teal'c helps her tighten up some of the top straps, as the Venil’s shoulders weren't as broad as humans. Farva gave Teal’c an odd look, but seemed appreciative none the less.Once finished, she grasped the vest in her paws with interest. “This armor seems quite lightweight, which is nice, weight is often an issue that causes us to forgo armor, since heavy armor would hurt our running ability.” Farva remarks. “Also the sheer amount of pockets seems quite excessive, what do you need all these for?”
“Well for starters it's currently missing these '' I hand Farva one of the armor plates which she looks over. “That is a depleted Naquadria ceramic composite plate. It’s designed to stop bullet impacts and dissipate energy weapon blasts. It slots into that chest compartment in the front and back of your armor.”
“This isn't quite what Id imagine for the armor of your kind”
“What do you mean?” I asked.
“Well judging by your ships I would have imagined you would put more emphasis on defense Your predatory nature would make you less likely to run away from conflict allowing for more encompassing armor to cover more than just your chest, since you have less need to run.”
She would put it like that.
“Well there are a number of reasons for that, a lot to do with those excess pockets you mentioned. For starters you will not be carrying the same amount of gear that the standard infantry unit would normally be carrying, we are preparing you for a quick in and out op. Normally us expedition teams need to be deployed into unknown territory for extended periods of time, we need to carry everything we might need with us from food, bullets, weapons, to comms gear, sensors, repelling equipment etc. The weight from all that gear adds up fast; In order to stay sufficiently mobile and combat effective; we only carry enough armor to protect our vitals, head and torso, anything else can hopefully be patched up by a field medic.”
Tielc gave his piece as well. “It is important to know when to run both towards and aways from one's foes, not every battle can be won through strength alone, but by strategy and cunning. Being able to reposition oneself quickly is therefore highly advantageous”
Farva seemed to freeze at Teal'c's statement, not out of fear I think, she instead had a distant look in her eye. To snap her out of her slump I handed her a standard ballistic helmet.
Seeming to get the idea she looked at it oddly and tried it on. It confirmed to her head shape decently well but depressed her ears to either side of her head, kind of resembling what one might imagine a sad bunny rabbit to look like “I don't think this will be something I can bring with me” she said ” I can't use ear signals and this will muffle my hearing.”
“Why don’t you keep it on for the time being, I think any extra hearing protection might be useful considering what we are about to try next.” I hand Farva some ballistic ear protectors, slightly modified and somewhat ramshackle. “One of the corporals worked closely with Nurse Fila to get an idea for safe decibels levels for your kind, we were also able to get these earbuds molded to fit into your ear canal better”
Farva took them and slipped them in. “These are a bit uncomfortable, what do I need these for?”
“You'll need them for this” I say as I unsnap the clasps on the weapons case revealing its contents.
The content seems to capture Farva’s interest, getting a slight tail wave.
“Okay So this here is a p90, It carries a 50 round top loading magazine of teflon coated armor piercing ordnance. With a cyclical rate of fire of 900 rounds per minute.”
Farvas ears perk up at this. “This seems like an efficient design, I take it these are a flashlight and laser sight for accuracy?” She asked, pointing to the top of the weapon.
“Yes we also have holographic and acog optics which will help line up targets from farther away.” I look on as Farva picks up the weapon and inspects it, testing the weight as I note that it will weigh a fair bit more once loaded. But she doesn't seem to be struggling with the weight. I can't help but notice good firearm safety as well, she keeps her finger well off the trigger and takes care to keep her weapon pointed aways from anyone else.
“This seems like a solid design but I'm not sure how useful those weapon optics would be, as they are not designed for my side facing eyes”
“I'm sure our master at arms can figure something out, why don't we give it a test fire first tho, before we send it off to make adjustments.” I instruct her on how to load the weapon and turn the safety off. I warn her of the sound it makes. And while definitely taken aback by the recoil and sound at first, she quickly gets the hang of it, she has some respectable shot groupings in both single fire and in short bursts. And keeps the rounds reasonably centered while firing in full auto.
She did a whole lot better than I would have initially suspected given her performance in the hanger bay a day before.
“The rate of fire seems useful” Farva spoke “This would be useful for our soldiers, our accuracy falters when we are panicked, and the increased shot count should guarantee some hits based on volume of fire alone” she finished with a dejected expression.
She quickly places the weapon back in its case, as if it burned to touch.” I don't know if I should be armed for this mission, at least not with that weapon, I don't want to miss and hit one of you in the back!”
“What? Nonsense, you are a great shot, and this is just a precaution in case we get separated or flanked and need some covering fire. If our guys are doing their job right you shouldn't need to fire a single round anyways.”
Captain Farva’s breathing started to hasten, earlier I might have thought it was fear, but I was starting to get an idea of what the captain's issues were. I’ve seen this before.
“I.. I can’t be trusted with this responsibility, every time I am left in charge of something, every time people put their lives in my paws I ....”
“Farva, don’t you start with me now you hear.” I said sternly, swiftly capping off her inevitable spiral of self doubt.
“But.. no.. you don’t understand”
Stopping her again I spoke. “But nothing, what happened before on that ship, and back at that colony is in the past. I don’t know your whole situation, but from what I have gathered from the crew It was nothing good. You feel responsible and it's eating away at you, and frankly it doesn’t matter if that's true or not. Accidents happen, people make mistakes, and when that happens we need to learn, take those lessons to heart, and don't let it stop us from helping people in the present. If you let guilt, or fear of mistakes stop you, then bad guys have already won, all without having to have fired a shot”
Farva is quiet for a short time, I was hoping I got through to her, I'm not the best and pep talks and this certainly wasn’t your typical weapons demo, if only everyones could go as smoothly as Ronan’s.
Farva spoke quietly, arms pressed up against her chest, she looked so sad, defeated, and small. Well more than usual anyways. “We can't be strong like you humans, we are too emotional and when we are scared we run away or we lock up and...”
“And that is clearly not the case with you captain Farva” Teal’c finally reentered the conversation having heard enough. “You have shown courage with every action you have taken so far, your actions have saved the lives of many of your crew, every time you have been threatened you acted not just to protect yourself but others as well. You attempted to contend with beings many times your size without even thinking about it, all in the effort to protect others, and this is only in the time we have known you, this speaks nothing of your actions over the colony. You are a warrior of admirable courage Captain Farva, your self doubt is unearned.”
A single tear rolled down Farva’s eyes which she quickly wiped away. “That was very nice of you to say, but I'm not brave like you say, I was terrified out of my mind the whole time.”
Teal’c looked puzzled. “I did not call you brave, I said you were courageous.”
Farva shot back with the little venlil one up one down ear flick I had very quickly learned was confusion.” I'm confused you just said brave twice”
“Hmm it appears your language does not contain the word I am using, I apologize I am not used to speaking through a translator” Teal’c relented “ There are two words I am using admittedly in slightly different forms, bravery and courage. Bravery or to be brave is to lack fear, to not be afraid to begin with. Courage tho, Is a trait far more admirable. Courage is to be afraid, to have fear, to worry about one's own mortality and personal safety. It is to acknowledge risk, danger, to feel fear, but to act in spite of it.”
“Had I not met your kind before I would have thought predators don't feel fear.”
“Everyone fears feel Farva, It is how we overcome it that determines our worth as warriors”
Teal’c picks up the p90 and returns it to Farvas hands.
“Your people need a warrior Farva, a warrior who protects the innocent and guides the lost to safety. You have shown how collected you can be in the heat of battle, You have already proven your worth in our eyes Farva, now you must do the same in your own. The greatest enemy lies not without” Teal’c places his hand firmly on the venlil’s chest “But within”.
After Action Report - Venlil Colonial Defense Force
Subject : Chief Engineer Donu
I fiddled with my holopad, Its small surface area proving to be a consistent source of annoyance in my current endeavor. Gone was the large workspace afforded to me by my holotable back in my office. Instead I had to work with the scaled down portable holotablet I was just fortunate enough to have strapped to my person when I was beamed away from our last ship. I was stuck with its smaller keyboard and slower rendering speeds.
An annoyed smooth skin alien looked over my shoulder at my device, attached to it was a jury rigged fiber optic cable, slotted into a terran silicon to crystal patch cable, which would convert the electrical signals broadcasted by my tablet into a bandwidth that the terrans crystalline based computers; which they used for highly complex tasks like hyperdrive and transporter systems; could use, and then It was patched again in a even stranger connector to patch into the odd asgard computer stones.
All in all it looked like someone tried to plug a regular computer into some crystal construct like you would find in a fantasy holonovel, and again plugged that into a harchen heat rock sauna lounge. Finally branching out from this conglomeration was a simple copper based wire that connects to a computer terminal at which currently sat the late Doctor Rodney Mckay. A title upon initially hearing led me to believe he was a medical doctor, which led to a flurry of medical questions that he had absolutely no means of answering.
While this odd alien nomenclature was interesting, what intrigued me more was his actual area of expertise, theoretical astrophysics, as well as a number of other diverse specialties and fields. Not to mention not only was he a great scientist who had he been raised in the more civilized portion of this galaxy, would have knowledge and aptitude that would put him alongside some of Aafas greatest minds, but he was also an engineer without peer, at least in this galaxy. His interactions with general Samantha Carter hinted at her possibly being his match if not more. For a species that was supposed to glorify violence the decision to have a scientist be arguably the most senior member of what was by their admission a military vessel spoke to their commitment to knowledge and understanding, a very noble prey-like goal.
I looked warily at the lines of code at my screen, the asguard translation program had earlier scanned our ship and was able to parse written languages, but complex files, like images and 3d design schematics were harder to encode and decode from our perspective systems. As is stands we have 3 completely separate computer architectures, the asguard can talk to human computers and the venlil computers can talk to the asguard computers, It sounds like we would have everything we need to get a human C.A.D schematic into a venlil holotablet right? Wrong! And you're stupid for entertaining such a idiotic notion! Parsing text from raw binary is relatively straight forward, you're just looking for patterns, repeating bit combinations that might infer letters and then iterating them over millions of times looking for patterns, letters, words, and then with a bit of help from some undecoded analog audio transmission, spoken language. This is a far cry from actual procedural communication protocols,the ones that allow for file transfers, exactly what we needed if we were to get Rodney's redesigned part schematics into a format and medium that can be plugged into a suitable fabricator. Assuming one still exists, which I can reasonably assume it does.
Speaking of which, I have just made something of a breakthrough. For upon my screen appears a simple geometric hydrogen cube, we’re talking vertices, planes, material data, everything we need for a usable design file.
I let out an excited pent up yip, the culmination of hours of frustrating software integration work. Unfortunately I startled Rodney, who lets out a panicked gasp and clutches his chest pelts with one of his paws.
“Oh god…..” He gasps, pointing at me “Please.. don’t do that”
“Sorry!” I say a bit meekly. I slowly approach him so as to not make him unnecessarily uncomfortable and show him my work.
“I got the file exchange set up, all we need from you is to finish any modifications to your part, upload them to my holopad, and then we can print away at any class 3 or above fabricator we can scrounge up on Brayga colony.”
“Ok.. um.. got it, I'm almost done i’m just you know” He points a lone grasping appendage at his screen,”Running some simulations, making sure everything is up to spec.” keeping his response kurt. “Sorry for freaking out there.”
I nod my head in the human display of affirmation and return to my workstation to further bug check my work, to test potentially problematic edge cases for when he finishes. Tho Rodney's continued odd behavior intruded on my thoughts.
I should have felt empowered, being able to intimidate this ‘massive beast’, but I didn't. I didn't like being feared, his people have been nice to me, Rodney himself courteous to a fault and desperate for positive attention.
I thought I could expect predators to be fearless but that clearly wasn't the case, rodney was fearful, nervous, had I not known better I would say defective, and while it annoyed his crew, they didn't berate him for it, or attempt to assert dominance, they encouraged it even with placating words and tried to help him through it, they encouraged and supported him like a proper herd, even if sometimes it took the form of what the human would call a playful ribbing. I supposed I could help him as well.
I approached him again, careful to make my approach known to him, making sure to approach from within his limited field of vision. He looks up at me with a wide eyed glare, had I not known him I might have assumed it was hunger, but I did and knew it to be concern.
“Uh high Donu.. um whats up?”
“Why are you afraid of us rodney?”
“Wa-What, me afraid?” he gives out a panicked laugh ”uh no no, I'm not afraid, you know just a bit weirded out I'm just getting used to you all, it's not a fear thing it's a a…. Just getting used to new aliens thing, ask Hermirod we went through this whole song and dance right buddy”
Hermirod furrowed his brow and gave an irritated sigh from across the room.
I reached out to take Rodney by the paw.
His whole body flinched at my mere touch, I quickly withdrew my paw.
“Oh.. um.. I didn't…”
“Rodney! It's okay, your crew doesn’t seem to care when you show fear, and neither do I. Why are you afraid of us? You are almost twice our size and surely double our strength, most venlil would scream and run in terror at the mere sight of you. What's wrong?”
Rodney let out a sigh. “Oh its, we don't have to talk about this, I can deal with this, I deal with scary situations all the time, it's fine, I'll be fine.”
“Rodney, my people are a very emotional, empathic people, we are open with our feelings and with our fear, and the fear of the one can affect the herd, please let me help you. I don’t know what to expect from your society but I promise I wont judge you for your fear or emotions, I mean look at many of my crew mates, we are no one to judge”
Rodney shot back “You didn't seem to be so bothered”
“I’m too old to care, I was about to retire, hell I was about to die as far as I knew, Brayga colony was supposed to be a quiet place to lay back, work on some hobbies, plant a garden and pester the young men of my colony until I either dropped dead of boredom or got lucky” I joked.
That seemed to raise Rodney's mood somewhat. He sighed and seemingly relented.
“It’s… a dumb story, I don't even know why it affected me so much, I come from a place on earth called Canada, people don't usually believe me when I say I am from there, us Canadians are notoriously friendly and I guess I haven’t exactly filled that mold for a lot of my life, but hey I'm working on it, people like me, I have lots of friends back at Atlantis” He says the last sentence in a way as if it isn't me he's trying to convince.
“I'm sure you do, Rodney, You seem like quite the charming individual when you're not cowering!”
“Ha ha thanks, maybe you could come and visit sometime. Tell that to doctor Becket, really nice guy, smart man, he would love to meet you, he loves investigating new species. But back on topic, oh boy, so me and my sister Jeannie were on a family trip to rural Vancouver to visit my grandpa's farm, he kept a lot of goats, not for eating or anything, they were essentially pets that he would use for milk”
“Wait hold on? You drink milk from other animals! Do your females not produce enough milk for their young?”
“Oh um no, we just sort of drink it or ferment it into cheese!”
“Ferment? You mean spoil?
“Yeh”
I reeled from this plasma blast of a statement, I like any right minded venlil had a number of nightmares about being an arxur’s cattle before, especially when I first learned about those things in primary school, but never once had it crossed my mind that we could be used for something so weird. What the speh was I supposed to do with that information?
“Maybe you should get back on topic”
“Yeh sorry about that uh.. Anyways the momma goat had just had a litter of babies, and their real cute when their little, so late in the day when my grandpa was asleep we snuck out to the pens so we can play with the little baby goats, our grandpa told us not to but you now how kids are.”
At this I think back to a young Nyan, as I teach him the inner working of the hyperdrive, I tell him he’s not cleared yet to operate in this engine compartment alone, but I could tell from the occasional caught black hairs and dropped writing implements, there had been a number of curious unauthorized expeditions into its inner workings, he didn't really listen either.
“My sister as always was trying to be the voice of reason, wanting to take it slow. If I was paying attention I might have noticed the angry moma goat who didn’t appreciate the strange human messing with her children.”
The color seemed to drain from his face.
“I uh…” He began to stutter again ”I screamed, a lot, it was rather undignified, she ran right at me, thank god it wasn't a male goat, one with horns, I tired to run but I was hit in the back and knocked over and kicked real good in the head, like wake up in the vet clinic a quarter mile down the road kind of bad”
“This goat was a prey animal?”
“That would be what your kind focuses on”
“Oh sorry”
“Anyways It seems dumb but I have just never been good with animals since then, especially ones that look like you; no offense; I'm getting better but when I first saw you guys in the hangar bay, I was just that dumb kid again, getting in way over my head, scared for my life. I guess there is something to be said about childhood trauma. I really should be over this, I'm getting better with it I swear it’s just”
I take his paw again, he doesn't flinch this time.
“I'm a venlil, a prey animal, I know fear, I know what it is to live in fear, It rattles your brain, it turns your paws to wet grains. It takes great strength to overcome it, to push it aside just long enough to protect the herd. Your herd relies on you Rodney and you are doing a great job in spite of your fear, in spite of having to work with those you fear. You have achieved intellectual feats that rival the greatest minds of the federation and all that while struggling with a traumatic experience. Fear isn’t dumb and there is nothing wrong with you for feeling it.”
“Thank you” Rodney says “That means a lot, I won't be like forever I promise, I just need some time.”
“We will laugh about this someday,” I assured. “Nothing as big and intelligent as you should be afraid of anything”
“Are you calling me fat?” Rodney exclaimed with fake offense.
We both chuckled.
My kind words had resulted in a more upright posture, and a more cheerful demeanor from the human, almost like when I congratulated Nyan on his work, and it got me a look at that happy snarl of his, that I was starting to grow quite fond of.
After Action Report - Venlil Colonial Defense Force
Subject : Apprentice Engineer Nyan
Oh wow! I get to write a report for this mission! I never get to write reports, Donu says they're too boring, but there’s so many interesting things going on all the time. Sometimes I sneakily write my own! Just for fun of course, nobody sees them, which is probably for the best as I sometimes get excited and embellish them slightly. One of the reports I wrote was about the time Donu used nothing but a wad of electrical tape, a bottle of high grain venlil alcohol and a pocket knife to repair a venlil medical ship just in time to get out of the way of a big scary space predator, with glowing red eyes and a million tentacles!
Anyways Im not sure If im suppose to write these In present tense first person or past tense. I asked the captain and she said it's whatever so long as I make sure any pertinent dialogues are properly quoted(“”).
“Nobody usually reads these things anyways.” She said, but this one is surely going to be so exciting, who could look away!
I mean who's gonna scoff at a chance to read about friendly predators from another dimension! A dimension of friendly predators who give warm head scratches and hand out yummy strayu not strayu treats called donuts, that are somehow fluffier than strayu, and have a nice moisture to them. I asked for the recipe but Samantha said we wouldn't have the ingredients back on Venili prime to make them, and Teal'c said the recipe is an old family secret. Its weird predators would be so protective of their plant snacks.
There are so many weird things about these predators, they have nurturing instincts that make them find us cute. They stay perfectly balanced even if they don’t have tails, swinging their arms and body all over the place to keep upright like a lopsided gyroscope, it's pretty funny looking!
They also wear artificial pelts all the time, which I thought was weird, I thought maybe the ships temperature was set by the angry gray alien since he’s the only crew member beside the venlil who walks around naked all the time, maybe he had a fit when it was to warm, and the humans obliged him cause they were worried they would make him even angrier, and wore clothes to make up for the cold. I thought this made sense, a lot of their technology does seem to come from the Asguard, maybe he has more say in the goings on of the ship because of that. But apparently humans just like wearing pelts all the time. They feel uncomfortable without them and don’t like it if you try to remove them or look up their upper artificial pelts they call shirts.
The humans are so weird, I don’t even have to embellish my reports to make it more interesting. Like that time with the big tentacled space predator. That may sound real compared to this stuff but it Isn't, Ha! I bet you fell for it at first, hook line and sinker! Like the humans would say. I think I used that saying right, I'm not sure what it means, but Shepard brought it up when he was telling a story about the wraith.
The humans are so nice, instead of exterminating their predators they try to cure them! Their doctors are working to modify the wraith so they don't have to eat humans anymore, so they can be friendly predators too.
Anyways I should probably get to the actual report part of this report. Farva says I should start after I went off with Samantha to work on some special astrophysics equations she said I would be good at. I kind of wanted to go with Donu to help Rodney get the new parts they needed, or Farva to help rescue our people, but the humans and even the angry gray alien got really weird when Farva mentioned taking me on the mission. Samantha seemed to want me to help her really badly so I didn’t mind. Samantha says I have the most important part to our mission. She's teaching me about how humans communicate through subspace, and about stellar drift equations. We are working on what she calls the exit strategy.

A/N: yeah I changed up the Alliance admiral's name from Shepard Adama to Sheparda Dama (so creative i know) because the old one was going to fuck me over badly at some point. It would be like trying to make a legitimate, serious fantasy novel with a wizard named Albus Gandalf. I was NOT cooking when I came up with that shit.
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It was said that no plan ever survived contact with the enemy. That, at least in the case of Marcus Wayne’s infiltration of Neldia, was proven entirely true.
His ship, the Peacemaker, had undergone an extensive refit before its jump to Neldia to both modify its sensor signature and repair its failing Aegis barrier. The first objective succeeded. The second did not.
One day later, leaving the derelict Ultimate Vigil behind in deep space, the United Human Alliance courier ship Winged Deliverance logged a real space entry at the edge of the Neldia system. Its crew, having spent their waking hours plagued by hallucinations and enduring horrible nightmares as they slept, found this shift very welcome. The worst, though they could hardly believe it, was still yet to come.
“The Neldian fleet is mustering for war,” rumbled the man who had once held the title and security codes of an Alliance sector admiral. Now, he was a traitor to his homeland. “Security will be high.”
“No need to worry, Admiral,” said Marcus Wayne. “Your code will get us through.” It would not.
It took two hours for the Peacemaker, disguised as the Winged Deliverance, to be challenged by the Neldian Armada. “Transmit clearance code,” said an automated voice. Marcus took out a data disc with the admiral's clearance code on it.
“Hold,” said Terris. She was clad in black, her active camouflage offline to save battery, and she had been sitting at the passive sensor console for the past three hours. “Look at this.” A news broadcast popped up in front of Marcus Wayne and his officers. Sector Admiral Sheparda Dama, or at least he was once a sector admiral, had been tried and convicted of high treason.
“It was a secret trial,” Dama said, still in shock at the revelation. “I had no knowledge of this.”
“Well, that tracks, but what do we do now? What code gets us through?”
“Transmit clearance code,” the voice said again, “or adjust course.”
Dama thought for a moment. “Change course,” he said. “We’re not getting through.”
They did. A great sense of defeat took hold in the hearts of the crew. They would never reach the Neldian hypercom. Sheparda Dama, who would have gladly given his life in defense of humankind, would never get the chance to be the man who broke their chains.
The Peacemaker was halfway out of the Neldia system before Terris spoke again. “Hold it,” she said. “I have an idea.”
That was why she had been placed where she was. Clad in an airtight stealth suit. Inside a hollowed-out asteroid. On a ballistic journey to the heart of Neldian space. It was the most insane idea that Marcus Wayne had ever seen.
But, sometimes, insanity was a symptom of genius.
Terris flew past the Neldian Armada undetected. Many asteroids entered the inner system this way, flung by outer-system prospecting ships to the foundries and shipyards in Neldian orbit, and they were thrown and caught so frequently that only the most cursory of inspections was put upon each one. Terris passed the Alliance fleet entirely undetected.
Terris’ chameleon suit could mimic the sensor return of the precious metals it was buried in, at least enough to fool a probing scan, and the cuts made by Protectoral engineers had been so precise that Terris had fit inside there with barely a centimeter of space to spare. She was effectively entombed inside sixty meters of solid rock.
Interstellar espionage was not a job for the claustrophobic.
Finally, after days of waiting, the signal came. She was in range. A mental command triggered a series of shaped charges in the rock above her, if such directions existed in microgravity, and forty pea-sized explosives blasted a circular tunnel all the way to the asteroid surface. If just one of them had failed, that rock might have been her tomb.
Terris tried not to think about that as she began climbing her way out. A brief burst from her suit’s EVA thrusters was enough to start her on her way, and the tunnel out was wide enough for her to use her arms and legs to speed things up. Finally, after too long a wait, Terris saw the Neldian sun for the very first time.
There was fire in the distance. Comm chatter on every band. Warships burning hard for the outer system. The Coalition fleet was here.
She zoomed in, far more than she had ever had to before, and she could pick out the faintest flashes of blue as warships exploded in the black. A brief crawl around the asteroid, which also helped to warm up her muscles after days of inactivity, let her discern an attack force engaging the Alliance fleet. After a moment’s hesitation, weighing the risks, Terris activated her passive sensor suite to try and decrypt Alliance military chatter.
Instantly, her sensors were flooded with noise from the defensive bastions. The fleet base at the L5 point was loudest, its comm operators screaming indecipherably at fellow Alliance elements fighting in the black. Neldian orbit, where the hypercom station was, seemed to be the centerpiece of all the communications traffic. The hypercom, unsurprisingly, was being used as a relay for comm traffic all across the system. Terris made a note to hack its server banks for intelligence, and perhaps leave a timed virus or two to shut down the system after she was gone.
Her suit bleeped, alerting her that she was in optimum position to make the leap to the hypercom. She zoomed in on it, a red and spiked thing just like everything else the Alliance made, and calculated the right trajectory to land right on its metal surface.
Trying to jump from a moving asteroid out past Neldia’s rings and hit a hypercom station barely three hundred meters in diameter was like shooting a rifle from a jumbo jet in hopes of hitting a mosquito down on Earth. A nearly impossible shot, even with Coalition computers to help make the jump, and anyone lucky enough to make it would have been better served bankrupting their local casino at the slot machines.
Terris gave a command to her suit, activating a set of ion thrusters to boost her off the asteroid and adjust her course mid-flight. She’d never believed in luck.
She coasted silent and graceful past the particle guns in high orbit, like a majestic swan flying on a summer wind. Their sensor arrays were directed out, past her, to the far distant parts of space where a trillion tons of steel were locked in deadly battle. Terris really did wish she could smile at the moment. She was about to have unrestricted access to the biggest communications relay in the star system, able to send out viruses and receive vital intelligence that could cripple the Alliance fleet if placed in the right hands. Terris, confident as ever, knew they would be.
She would make the Neldian Armada burn, and they had no idea she was even coming.
She reached the hypercom station in just under a day, agonizingly slow for a woman like her, hovering just above its surface to avoid triggering pressure sensors. After that, it was simple enough to get inside. Terris found it almost trivial to bypass the airlock sensor grid and trigger the outer bulkhead to open unnoticed, its report to the command room destroyed before it ever arrived. Entering the station itself was easy after that.
Here, there was gravity. She could not hover like she had on the outside of the station. But here, there were no pressure sensors. She really had no need to hover.
The corridor she found herself in was large enough, though nothing like the expansive halls of a dreadnought, and a patrol of marines in powered suits trundled towards her obliviously. Terris had made the right call not to wear a Phantom powered suit. She ducked into an alcove, the chameleon suit concealing her from even their impressive sensor batteries, and they passed by with no clue at all.
Terris made it to the server banks with ease. Most of the hypercom’s security measures took the form of warships in orbit, clustered tightly around the planet to prevent exactly this scenario from happening, but those warships were off waging war. The station defenses were hopeless now that she was actually inside.
The data was encrypted, and she could neither access it nor copy it without potentially fatal consequences, but she wasn’t there to steal data. A brief, milliseconds-long connection to the primary server was all it took to riddle the entire system with custom-tailored computer viruses. The viruses were self-replicating, rather like an electronic version of the biological ones on Earth. They worked similarly, too, meant to latch onto outgoing communications signals and remain inert for a certain amount of time before activating and wreaking havoc across cyberspace.
The program would be scoured from the net in seconds once it began its assault, but it would cause plenty of chaos before then. And, with another critical transmission being scheduled to send at around that time, Terris knew her mostly-ineffective virus attack would be just enough of a distraction to make sure its message was heard.
Terris planned to leave the station in approximately thirty minutes. Shortly after that, the fireworks would begin. It was going to be beautiful.
She heard footsteps. A maintenance worker, no doubt. It was time for her to go. She disconnected from the server, taking pains to hide her involvement, and snuck out of the server room like a ghost in the night.
Next was the transmission array. This room was better-guarded, its door being flanked by marines, but Terris slipped inside by trailing behind an officer as he entered on some unknown pretext. After that, her daring and sleight of hand made sure Admiral Dama’s pre-recorded propaganda transmission was uploaded to the hypercom transmitter. It came with a set of instructions bearing the Admiralty’s seal, changed to be anonymous, to ensure as many people as possible heard his message.
In just under one standard hour, the United Human Alliance would be shaken to its very core. Terris had just made sure of it.
It took longer than she had expected for the door to open again and give her a chance to slip out. Terris had spent that time quite productively, downloading as many incoming and outgoing messages as she could to the internal hard drive just by her spinal cord. Even if they were encrypted, they’d be useful intelligence once Coalition codebreakers took a crack at them.
After that, it was trivial to slip past marine patrols and escape to the hull of the hypercom station. Terris found her ride, an Alliance warship by the name of Brightest Thunder, holding orbit just near the hypercom station. Admiral Dama, even if he was no longer an admiral, still had connections.
She charged her ion thrusters by tapping into the station reactor, an act which did not go unnoticed, but by then it was too late to respond. She had completed her incursion. The damage had been done. Perhaps if the Alliance acted swiftly and accurately, they could undo it, but Terris was a careful woman. She had covered her tracks well.
Waving one final goodbye to the crew of the hypercom station, Terris triggered her thrust pack and shot off into the ink.
“You must be my passenger.” A man in an Alliance captain’s uniform was waiting for her in the Brightest Thunder’s airlock. He wore a helmet and gloves, hermetically sealed to his airtight outfit, so he felt no effects from the vacuum of space. “I was sent by Sector Admiral Sheparda Dama,” he announced after a period of silence, “To transport you and whatever you may have safely to the Coalition fleet.” Nothing. Apart from the dull thudding of the ship’s railgun batteries, firing missiles at range to ward off a strike force of Coalition ships, the airlock was quiet as a ghost.
“You cannot expect me to endanger my life and the lives of my crew without at least some identification that you are who you claim to be!” Silence. Captain Senar Trevy had been standing in that airlock for three and a half hours, while his ship was tasked with screening Neldia and her eighteen billion inhabitants from harm, and he was just now wondering if he had been talking to a ghost.
“I am,” came a voice. Cold. Sterile. Inhuman. Exactly the kind Trevy expected from the secret spies of his former admiral.
“So you are.” Captain Trevy thought for a moment. He cycled the airlock. If his guest held hostile intent, one steel bulkhead would make no difference. “I’ve been stocking the crew with handpicked men and women since I received word of the operation,” he explained as they walked through the ship’s corridors. The crewmen he passed thought him insane. “I can’t vouch for them all, but the ship as a whole will obey me.” No response. Sometimes, Captain Trevy thought himself insane as well.
“This is my personal quarters,” he told the specter, stepping inside and sealing the door behind him. “I must warn you, for your own safety, it would be best not to leave it. The crew are mostly still Alliance loyalists.” He looked around, paying no heed to the decorated furniture or artificial sky, and finally shrugged and sighed. “Are you even here, still?”
Terris decloaked. She stood between him and the door, winged and cloaked in black like a demon of ancient myth. “I am.”
“You’re a black angel.” Senar Trevy, to his credit, kept his composure well. “A spy for the Ierad Republic.” He questioned her purpose here. They both knew it.
“You weren’t told?”
“I was told an alien would be coming aboard, but…” Trevy shrugged again, as if to say ‘what am I supposed to do?’ “The admiral vouched for you. That much is enough for me.” He also knew he had no choice in the matter. From what he knew about black angels, his ship had been lost the moment she boarded.
“I could have impersonated him,” said Terris, voice a perfect replica of Captain Trevy’s own. Even his own mother could not have told the difference. “And I’m trained to lie.” She was testing him, gauging his reaction to assess his personality. She was good at that.
“I could have you screened for deception,” Trevy countered, pointing up at a pearl-sized camera in the ceiling. Terris made a note that it was disabled. “And I could have had the technology officers vet your transmission.”
“I’m trained to lie well.” Terris sat down on Captain Trevy’s bed, a spartan thing compared to the sleeping quarters of most officers. There were no chairs in the room, so her options were few. She took off her helmet and tried to at least appear relaxed. In reality, she was anything but. “It comes with the job, really.”
“Fair,” Trevy chuckled, feigning calm. “I suppose the question now becomes whether or not you can trust me.”
“It’s a safe gamble.” Terris made a mental calculation. It would take her between thirty and fifty seconds to kill Captain Trevy, take the bridge, and vent the ship. That was a very safe gamble. “Besides, that’s what a peace treaty is.” Trevy looked confused. “A leap of faith. You trust your enemy to back their word, and you trust them to trust you as well. If we can’t get along here, can’t put aside our differences to work toward a common goal, then the Alliance will be right. And I hate it when they’re right.”
“I’m speaking to you now because I know they are wrong.” That came as no surprise to either of them. “You know, I was once a foreman of a labor crew in the munitions factories. The most productive unit in my sector.” That one did come as a surprise. “As a foreman, you get leeway to make certain decisions regarding the… well, I suppose they are slaves, under your command. Food intake and the like.” Captain Trevy looked pained when he brought up such memories. Terris wasn’t convinced that was how he really felt. “They use it to weed out any potential xeno sympathizers from the populace. Of course, at the time, I wasn’t so empathetic.”
“So you were a slave driver, and you beat your slaves to make them work. I hope every one of those shells was sabotaged.” Terris’ voice dripped with disdain. She had almost forgotten the Alliance captain was her enemy.
“No, I showed mercy,” Trevy defended himself. “I was generous.” This made Terris reconsider. Perhaps Senar Trevy could be an ally, if not a friend. “I won’t say I was a good man, but I wasn’t cruel. I was practical. Strong, healthy, well-treated workers are more productive than the beaten sacks of flesh in the other factories. My crew’s output was unmatched.”
“And?” Terris cocked her head inquisitively. For a high-ranking officer in the space navy of a genocidal regime, Senar Trevy really did not seem so bad. To be fair, however, she had set the bar pretty low.
“I was investigated for anti-human activity.” Terris could have predicted that. She almost did, too. “They sent me to the fleet, and my labor crew was reacquainted with the energy whips and pain beams.” There was no carrot for an Alliance labor slave. Only the stick. “Their productivity fell thirty percent in the first two weeks alone.” He sounded almost mournful as he said that. He was not lamenting the loss in productivity.
“You see,” said Trevy, “Hatred is not natural. It has to be caused, sustained, nurtured from the day a man is born until the day he dies.” With that, at least, Terris agreed. “And, as you’re about to see, a nation built around cruelty or prejudice cannot sustain itself. It will have to apply pressure to maintain its flawed status quo, like it did with me, and the pressure will build and build until it cannot build anymore.” He tapped a few buttons on the data disc in his hand. It began projecting an image of the battle for Neldia. He placed it on the bed next to Terris. “Now it’s breaking.”
“I wonder if they’ll find themselves in need of more shells.” Terris knew it wasn’t just shells. Every time a slave driver prioritized hatred over hard work, put cruelty over their quota, or even just bowed their head and obeyed the traditional dogma, they hurt the Alliance. Across nine worlds, with billions of slaves not working as they could have, things started to add up. “You know, for a superior species, your fleet is really getting its ass kicked right now. Might want to work on that.”
Captain Trevy nodded. His data disc beeped. He was needed on the bridge. “Agreed,” he said. “I hope this war ends soon, and to our mutual benefit. I’d hate to face you on the battlefield.” He picked up the data disc and turned to leave.
“Oh, forgot to mention, there’s a virus embedded in the transmissions you’ve received. Self-replicating. Nasty piece of work.” Terris shifted a bit in her seat. “Almost forgot about that.”
“Well, better to know now than when it’s activated,” Trevy smiled. “I’ll have Technology Officer Galdir investigate it.” With that, he left. His duty to the Alliance was nonexistent, but the men and women under his command still needed him. He had waited too long in the stateroom.
Terris, with nothing better to do, got to work on cracking the encryption in the transmissions she had copied. She failed. A transmission from deep in unknown space, sent from a dreadnought at the head of a task force known only as the Deep Expedition Fleet, was the only message she could read. Its contents, while troubling, mattered little at the moment. What was far more crucial, however, was the message Terris could not decipher. The military battle plan of Janus Ora’s personal armada.
The battle plan that, when analyzed on a Republic starship, would reveal its terrible secret too late.
The Coalition fleet was walking into a trap.
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Original: https://www.reddit.com/MuslimMarriage/s/rDHR1xDDj5
Assalamualaykum everyone. Thank you all for the great advice. I’ve been a lurker on this sub for a while and for once I feel there’s constructive advice. I didn’t take any of it since the events happened before I could read the replies, but thank you. Me and my wife had the argument a couple of days ago and I wrote the post the morning after. Didn’t upload it until a few hours later but a lot has happened since then.
Update:
I had to go home to get some clothes and toiletries and saw my wife wasn’t at home. We have each other’s locations so I quickly went to avoid the conversation as I told her a little before I’d get in contact when I was ready. I guess I took too long because she came home as I was leaving. I tried leaving before we had another argument but she looked terrible and begged to have a conversation. She tried kissing and hugging me but I wasn’t ready and we sat down. She explained that her intention was not to slap me but rather to push me away because she thought I was trying to hug her. We have a camera in our hallway and she showed me the footage and it did kind of look that way, even then I’m not sure. She explained that she has been feeling rejected since I have not been giving her the usual attention ever since the project started. It is true as on my part, our date nights and time together has gone down significantly.
She said that her friend knew none of our problems beforehand and showed me the texts, there weren’t any deleted ones as the conversations made sense and I can tell when she’s lying. Her friend was driving past when she saw us. She still said that she’s cut her friend off without me saying anything. I’ve explained that yes I’m happy she cut her friend off, but it’s not all her fault. She should’ve talked to me before accusing me and believed me.
My wife explained the reason she reacted the way she did was because of her upbringing. She saw her sister being cheated on and resented her sister for staying with her brother in law. She promised herself she’d never be that weak and would leave immediately. She now realised she took it too far and hated herself for it. She went upstairs and came back with all her jewellery and gifts I’ve bought her. She says she doesn’t deserve any of it and I should take it back. She’s so scared that I’ll divorce her but begged me to give her another chance. I was silent for a bit and she even started hugging my legs asking me not to. She got hysterical and was crying and I had to calm her down.
From my side I said I apologised for neglecting her because I didn’t give her any attention if I’m honest these past months. My best friend made me realise it and we had a good conversation. I explained to my wife that I’m sorry and I’m not going to divorce her over one big fight we had when she’s given me all I can want as a husband. A lot of people said I should leave her, but I couldn’t have asked for more before our fight. She does everything for me without me asking, it’s to the point I have to force her to let me do things. I said that I’m going to take some space away at my friends, and once my project is wrapped up in a couple of days we can spend some time together. She said that she wants us to take a weekend getaway and that she’d pay for it. I told her to take back her jewellery and that I’d pay for the trip. She said she’d start looking and that she’ll text me the details. She apologised again and thanked me. She hugged me and wouldn’t let me go and we had dinner together before I left. She gave me a couple of letter she wrote before I went back. People also said to get our parents involved, but if I did my family might’ve hated her. We also did discuss if anything happened like this then she’d be gone and if she has anything on her mind to confide in me. I might not have forgiven her so quickly had she not cut off her friend without me asking and taking accountability.
Thank you all for the support, I’m happy this sub has been helpful for once😂.

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Hello again! This batch of chapters is looking pretty spicy, and I'm really excited to share them with you! Not really much else to say, tbh, other than that I'm once again really thankful for all of your patience and understanding when it comes to my upload schedule. I know it's tough sometimes to drop in and out of stories like this, and even worse to see the last upload date for a story you like being "100 days ago," but we're still making our way there slowly! Besides, the most tender dishes are the ones that boil slowly~
As always, I hope you enjoy reading! :D
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Fanart: The Brightest Star in the Night Sky, by u/Frostedscales
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Thank you to Philodox on discord for proofreading and editing RfD.
Thank you to Pampanope on reddit for the cover art.
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Memory Transcript Subject: Sylvan, Venlil Citizen
Date: [Standardized Human Time]: December 13, 2136
​
“Everything’s good to go over here, Kenta! How about you?”
“Fine on my end too boss! Though I still don’t know how to feel about how I’ve arranged the sandwiche– err… sylvanas. Cucumber salad next to blueberry? They kind of don’t match…”
“I already told you a million times, they look fine!”
“You sure…?”
“I’m sure! Now are you ready to start this thing?”
“Ready!”
“Then let’s go!”
I shut the door to the kitchen, making sure that I had not left anything behind that would be needed for the day, then began wheeling out the final cart of amenities. As I rolled it down the wooden floor of my emptied out diner, one long serving tray jostled back and forth across the surface top.
I looked down to recap my inventory. A motley of sylvanas cleanly cut into triangles lay in an ornate pattern atop a decorative bed of raw ipsom grain stalks, spiraling around the edges of the plate as it creeped its way closer to the center. The sylvanas were split into clear groups based not only on their filling, but of the colour of that filling as well, creating a literal rainbow of flavours to choose from. By all means, it was an absolutely marvelous display of art; a visual performance that I had no idea could be captured in something like a dish to be served at such a quaint event. Kenta, however, seemed to still be worrying over it.
Despite it apparently being part of the name according to my translator, the Terran fruit named “blueberry” was actually a deep shade of indigo rather than blue, especially when crushed into a form of jam. As a result, lacking any blue to connect the various green options of our rainbow to that of the very limited indigo, Kenta had ended up spending much too long worrying over such a minute detail.
‘What a dummy…’ I thought back to myself with a slight chuckle. ‘I guess he’s worrying about this just as much as I am.’
Hardly two or three steps remained between the food cart and the diner’s entrance. Hastily, I jogged up to the front door to prop it open. However, when I went to turn the handle, I felt it give way without even the slightest push. Someone was pulling it from the other side, causing me to be yanked forward and stumble. Looking up, I saw the rusty figure of Fehnel standing impatiently in the doorway.
“You almost done in here, Sylvan?” she asked in a hurried breath. “Here, let me help you with that.”
Before hearing my response, Fehnel had already grabbed ahold on the cart and began pulling it outside without delay. I let go and didn’t attempt to stop her, knowing full well the farm woman was likely much stronger than I. In a blur, she was already far from the door, and I began jogging after her in an attempt to keep up.
Just as the day before, the Inverter was powered on and running perfectly. The metal pylon let out a slight, continuous hum as it projected an energetic beam from its center, which split at the apex around the height of the Lackadaisy and fell down in a parabolic curve, creating a tangible anti-gravity field in its wake.
Just outside the field, it became immediately clear just how necessary this piece of advanced Federation technology was. Beyond the radiant dome, a thick rain riddled the sky and drowned the world it fell unto. A harsh wind howled and distant thunder roared, which combined with the rain to push against the field to no avail. Within, where so many confectionaries, decorations, and other preparations had been so carefully placed, not even the paw of Solgalick could disrupt us.
“You know this would be goin’ a lot faster if I could jus’ start grabbin’ the food ma’self,” Fehnel commented in a tone too preoccupied to be annoyed.
As I ran after the hauling Yotul, I tried to say, “Fehnel, I’d really appreciate it if you would–”
“I know, I know,” she interrupted back, seemingly distant. “You want me to ‘not go into the diner during the event.’ Listen Sylvan, I get that Kahnta back there is a fainter, but don’t you think that this is a tad extreme? We’re on a tight schedule here, y’know?”
“I know… it’s just kind of a golden rule. I can’t stress to you enough how important it is that nobody does so much as peak in there,” I reiterated as I jogged alongside the speeding Yotul. “And don’t worry. Once everything starts, then you can feel free to socialize and spend the day with your daughter. I’ll take care of restocking the food.”
“I suppose that’s awful nice of ya,” Fehnel breathed out. “Sure you won’t be tirin’ yourself out, hun?”
I shrugged. “Eh. How fast could people possibly eat? It’ll be fine.”
“Careful there. Don’t wanna be sprintin’ before your legs catch up,” Fehnel chuckled. “But I’m plenty thankful for the confidence. I’ll try to hold ya to your word.”
As we moved, I was able to take a brief second to look around. I began to marvel at how far the event had come since its initial inception. And under such short time restrictions as well! Through a combination of both the Lacakdaisy’s furniture, as well as a number of decorations that I had rented, we had ended up with something that I had truly considered exemplary. In traditional Venlil style, a forest of various greenery had been set out in a colourful array of paw-crafted pots and other containers. Small bushels, flowers, a few overhanging trees, and other vegetation stood proudly within. From each, incandescent ornaments of various hues emerged in a bright and brazen display. All of which combined to transform the normally secluded street atmosphere into one that was truly cozy, if not just the slightest bit packed within the bubble. In accordance with one of Fehnel’s initial requests, we had even arranged for a small wooden stage to be brought in, which fit neatly against… something that I would rather not look at…
Of course, decorations aside, one of the most enrapturing displays was that of the food itself. Positioned at various places all around the event’s area, tables upon tables of buffet items had been laid out. It was a marvelous display on all fronts. From the generously sized serving bowls of pasta, plates of still steaming gyoza, and the diverse types and variations of strayu laid in motley rows all throughout, the feast was like a colourful microcosm of everything Kenta and I had been working towards.
But what was even more impressive were all the new additions Kenta had made. Just as expected, my wayward chef had taken the original request and spun it on its tail, seemingly pulling no stops when it came to expanding our already diverse arrangement. From end to end, small, round discs of strayu called “Danishes” lay against each other down the side of one of the tables. Most impressively, the center of each had been filled in with various hues of jam, in a similar style to that of the sylvanas that I was currently wheeling towards it.
On the other side of the same table, a sundry of embellished wooden bowls sat parallel, each filled with various kinds of Venlilian-style salads. I had taken the time to teach him such recipes a good while back, but while at first these seemed to be rather unostentatious, a quick look revealed that Kenta had added his own twist to the otherwise typical mix of local produce. Tossed about each salad were dozens of small strayu cubes called “Croutons,” each baked until crisp and crunchy. What’s more, if the olfactory receptor in my mouth didn’t deceive me, I had even picked up the heavenly aroma of something Kenta had only introduced to me recently as “Garlic,” which had clearly been infused into the cubes.
On another table, steaming crocks of both soups and stews had been laid out for guests to self serve. But in lieu of a bowl, Kenta had elected to do something truly unique. It had taken me a moment to process his idea at first, but hollowed out husks of rotund strayu loaves had been left out for guests to grab, in which they were supposed to fill the “bread bowls” – as Kenta had called them – with the soup and eat them as normal. This even came with the advantage of being able to tear off small pieces of the now soup-soaked strayu, allowing one to enjoy the taste of both simultaneously. This idea, I had soon realized, would be the hardest to explain to any confused guests that might happen by.
As we approached the soup table, Fehnel and I began loading up the cart-full of sylvanas we had brought over onto a free area. We placed them right next to one other new recipe that Kenta had decided to share. A simple display of thinly cut slices of crunchy, lightly seasoned strayu, with a bright red sauce readied next to it that I instantly recognized as being the product of tomatoes mixed with oil. According to Kenta, these “Bruschetta” were a simple, yet simultaneously alluring appetizer, which would do well to pair with the soup he had stirred up.
Once the sylvanas had been laid out, Fehnel felt the urge to ask, “Is that the last of it?”
“Yes, for now,” I replied, absentmindedly stretching my back. “This’ll cover the initial rush of hungry people, I assume. But Kahnta’s already busy working on seconds.”
“Gotta say Sylvan, this is quite the impressive spread,” Fehnel said with a quick, delighted wag of the tail. “Y’know… When I asked for somethin’ new, I wasn’t expectin’ Kahnta over there to whip up so much.”
“Oh this isn’t the new dish you asked for,” I answered flatly. “That’s still being worked on.”
Fehnel froze solid, only her ears remaining seemingly automotive as they slowly shifted towards me. “Wait… what?
“Yeah all of this is just the appetizer according to Kahnta,” I explained, messing with a few arrant sylvanas that had broken symmetry. “There’s going to be one more plate of food that should be coming out shortly. And then dessert after that.”
“That’s… surely somethin’...” was all Fehnel could say. She opened her mouth as if to continue her train of thought, only to have something else pull her attention away.
Peering out into the stormy weather of the darkened town, an eye-catchingly large herd of people were making their way towards the bright dome that sketched our event’s area. Silhouettes of familiar patrons and wayward newcomers alike huddled under their umbrellas. All the while, an excited murmur hummed throughout the air, despite the noise of the rain around them. The guests were here, and they seemed excited.
I peered down at a small data pad. “Oh, second-sun already? Looks like we just barely made it on time.”
Fehnel simply wagged in acknowledgment, still the slightest bit flabbergasted.
I nudged her side, which seemed to knock her out of her trance. “Want to go greet them?”
Taking one look at me, then peering back at the ensemble of strange and alien foods behind her, one of Fehnel’s ears flicked a little. Then, she did the tail equivalent of a Human shrug, letting out a pleased chuckle. Whatever had been on her mind was apparently pushed to the side for now. “Heh, of course hun. Let’s treat ‘em to somethin’ special.”
With a newfound kick in her already hastened step, Fehnel began to proudly jog over towards the approaching crowd. By now, we could already begin to make out some faces, each looking more curious than the last.
In addition to the Brachistochrone Inverter itself, Jeela had also taken the liberty to have a reception area installed in the form of a metallic tunnel about the width of three Venlil. The tunnel seemed to fold and bend the anti-gravity energy around it, allowing for people to easily enter the repulsion field without having to tread through a torrent of redirected rainwater. Additionally, a series of hooks alongside the interior of the tunnel also served as a convenient area for the storage of umbrellas and coats, which our guests quickly began making use of the moment they started funneling through.
Fehnel and I stood at the side of the entrance, welcoming in guest after guest with the appropriate propriety. At first, many of them were stymied in their step, staring in awe at the sanctuary-like atmosphere that had been created in the middle of the street. But almost as soon as they got their bearings, most realigned their immediate priorities, and subsequently made a beeline for the buffet tables. That’s what they were here for, after all. Hopefully they’d come to appreciate the actual reason Fehnel was hosting this event soon enough.
As we busied ourselves, the voices of many excited guests made themselves audible.
“I’ve been looking forward to this!”
“Look at the decorations!”
“I feel like I’m in the Capital!”
“Are you sure all of this is free?”
“The ad said it was! Either way, I need to try some of this!”
Fehnel and I watched in delight as the crowd began to form around the tables, a number of plates I had left out disappearing as fast as the eye could blink. However, it was clear that a majority of the attention received had been focussed solely on the more familiar menu items already offered by the Lackadaisy.
“Think they’re gonna touch any of the new stuff?” Fehnel idly commented, her attention still fixed on the crowd. “It’d be a shame if any of it goes to waste.”
“Oh they will,” I answered without hesitation. “Just give them a moment. They’ll be all over it soon enough.”
Fehnel laughed. “You sound awful confident, don’tcha?”
“Oh please, this is hardly the first time I’ve served some wacky new thing to my customers,” I answered back with a chuckle of my own. “If anything, at this point I’d say I’m quite the expert. Just watch. You’ll see.”
Like clockwork, my precognitive claim had been proven true mere moments later. Some soul amongst the table’s crowd had seemingly been more curious than the rest, and ended up taste-testing one of the bruschetta. It was hard to make out from this distance, but if I had to guess, her ears had perked up and her eyes had widened in surprise. What was made clear, however, was their opinion of the new food, because only a few moments later could their voice be heard.
“You have got to try some of this stuff!” she practically yelled at anyone who would listen. “It tastes like the red stuff that’s on the pasta, but like… even stronger! It’s so good I feel like I died and am one with the Stars already!”
Like a Farsul unto a library, the crowd collectively swiveled their ears and began to gravitate towards the bruschetta with eager eyes. A few more voices piped up in glee, each more delighted than the last as paw after paw descended on the strayu until there was nothing scarce of crumbs left.
‘Guess that’ll be the first thing I’ll need to restock,’ I thought with a passive wave of the tail, before a sudden realization crept into my mind. ‘Ugh… Kenta and I might be busier today than I thought…’
It wasn’t long before the elation of trying something new, mixed with the sudden and devastating lack of bruschetta, had urged our party guests to move on to the other, never before seen options that laid out to fill their fancy. All at once, the wall of wool and fluff had spread out the slightest bit as fresher waters were explored. Plates were filled with various salads, despite the unfamiliar bits of crunchy strayu inside raising some skeptical ears. Helping after helping of the technicolour pastries were reached for as well, with the sylvanas not lasting much longer after that. And most impressively, it seemed that people had quickly begun to figure out the concept of Kenta’s cute “bread bowl” idea as well, even without instruction.
That last turn of events had actually caught me the slightest bit off guard. For the bread bowls being quite possibly the most unique aspect of the event – well, that I knew of – I found myself rather impressed by how fast people were getting the hang of it. Sure, it meant that I wouldn’t have to bother myself with having to go around explaining it to everybody, but in my eyes, there was a bit more to it than that. Perhaps it was a case of grasping at straws, but for the briefest moment, it made me wonder whether or not Humanity’s ideas had been affecting my people more than I had realized. Perhaps, if only in the slightest, Kenta had been opening their minds to more unique ideas than I had given him credit for. Without the slightest bit of hesitancy, the partygoers did well to experiment with more than the obvious, quickly wrapping their minds around something completely new and extraordinary.
I exhaled a short-breathed snicker, shaking the thought out of my head. ‘Calm down there, Sylvan. It’s just some soup and a piece of strayu shaped like a bowl. No need to get all philosophical about it. Still, I guess them figuring it out saves me some time. Good, cause it looks like I already need to start stocking the next round…’
I moved to grab my cart so that I could head back inside, only to have Fehnel call out and grab my attention instead.
“Sylvan, hun,” she began. “Before you go makin’ yourself scarce. I think there’s somethin’ about this here party that you haven’t explained yet.”
My head turned out to face her. “Hm?”
“Now, don’t get me wrong… What you did here is great and all. By all means, whenever it is that Kadew decides to show up here with that date of hers, I’m sure she’ll start coming around to the idea of my peoples’ Runnin’ Day. But…”
I now realized that Fehnel was completely focussed on something off in the distance.
“Oh,” I replied. “That…”
I had done well to ignore it up until this point. In fact, if I tried hard enough, I was even able to keep it completely hidden from my peripheral. But the truth was, no matter where I went or what I did to distract myself, there was no denying that it was there – that She was there.
At the opposite end of the dome, an onyx terror lurked over the ignorant, complacent masses. Its wicked enormity great, and the pressure about it even greater. The form it took was terrifying. An alien pose, unknown to the mind, originated from a people feared by many. Its peering eyes descended as domineering malevolence. And from its onyx chassis, a message rang clear as a day personally forged by Solgalick themself: Even if I couldn’t see her; if I shielded herself from my sight all day… No matter what, She could always see me.
“I’m gonna be honest Sylvan, I did not take you as someone that had a thing for Magister Jeela.”
I shot back quicker than a bolt of lighting. “I DO NOT HAVE A ‘THING’ FOR–” before stopping myself short.
Luckily, my voice had not been noticed among the now loud, chattering crowd about us. Which was good. I was pretty sure that my voice had cracked into an almost childishly high pitch. Taking a deep breath, I yanked my composure back, and stuffed an air of professionalism back into my voice yet again.
“I a-appologize…” I mumbled out, my head shrinking between my shoulders.
“No worries!” Fehnel replied. She couldn’t help but let a few chuckles pour into her voice. “I was just teasin’ is all. But seriously, you’re gonna have to whip up a pretty darn good explanation… Else I’m boutta start thinkin’ that what I just said was true.”
I took a deep breath, which soon shifted into a long-winded sigh. “Listen… It was part of the deal, alright? I’m not proud of it, but it’s there now, and unless you’ve got a herd of Mazic heavylifters at the beck and call, I can’t get rid of it.”
“Part of the deal?” Fehnel repeated.
“It’s my end of the bargain for us being able to have this Inverter during the event. And no, before you ask, it was not worth it,” I explained.
I could do nothing but feel immense shame for the inconvenience. To have something so overbearing, so shamelessly grandstanding placed in the middle of what was supposed to be a quaint event about cross-cultural understanding… It was beyond disrespectful to Fehnel’s original request. It took something that the poor woman had been planning for who knew how long, and brutally morphed it into a shadow of its former self. Into nothing but an ego trip for a politician that probably already surrounded themselves with weed biters and paw lickers.
“Listen…” I said, lowering both my tail and ears in respect. “Fehnel, I apologize profusely for allowing that thing to be placed here. I should have put my paw down and just hosted the event inside like we planned. But it’s too late now. I’m really sorry…”
But to my surprise, Fehnel had not been paying attention to my display of humility. Instead, her focus was still on that of the statue.
“I think it looks neat!” she said in a cheery tone.
“Y-you do?” I mumbled back.
“Well yeah!” She wagged her tail to assure me. “Sure it’s a bit, err… unconventional… But I think it’s got quite a bit of charm to it!”
“That’s… one way of saying it…”
“Besides, it might not be the worst thing to have somethin’ from the Magisters here with us,” Fehnel continued to think out loud. “Sorta gives this whole event a kinda official feel, y’know? Like it’s lettin’ everyone here know that the Yotul have got just as much right bein’ under the same heedin’ ears of the Governor as anyone else. Sure, dependin’ on where you are and who you ask, that may or may not be a good thing. But it at least means it’s harder to ignore us now. Heck, might even convince some of the people ‘round here to open up a little to the other parts of us.”
“Well… so long as you’re happy with it, I suppose?” I worded awkwardly.
If I had been completely honest with myself, I was expecting the slightest bit more… Well, I wasn’t sure. Perhaps anger? Annoyance? Unrelenting grief that invariably led to locking yourself in a closet, crying? But there was no sign of that in the rusty Yotul’s eyes. As she stared up at the onyx marvel, I couldn’t help but feel as though there was no sign of the negativity I had anticipated in the slightest. Instead, all that remained was that of a solemn pride. Maybe she was lying to herself. Like it was some sort of coping mechanism that helped her work around this unwelcome development in her plans. But regardless, the end result remained. And I was left feeling relieved at being able to avoid yet another hurdle.
‘Fehnel really knows how to look at the optimistic side of things, I guess… Good. I could really use some more of that around here.’
“Feel free to run along now, Sylvan,” she said, waving me a satisfied flick of the tail. “I’ll keep waitin’ here so I can greet the other guests. And I do hope you and Kahnta can bring out the main course whenever it’s ready. I wanna make sure everything’s ready to blow Kadew’s fur off whenever she decides to get here.”
I had to force myself not to flash a Human smile in return. She and the rest of the partygoers had no idea what was coming. And to a certain extent, neither did I. He did mention he had some sort of “surprise” coming, after all. But I always trusted Kenta for his word, and knowing what my chef was capable of, it never occurred to me once that it wouldn’t live up to the expectations. In fact, I was counting on him to exceed them.
I turned around and headed back to the kitchen. It was time to get the real party started.
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Hello again! This batch of chapters is looking pretty spicy, and I'm really excited to share them with you! Not really much else to say, tbh, other than that I'm once again really thankful for all of your patience and understanding when it comes to my upload schedule. I know it's tough sometimes to drop in and out of stories like this, and even worse to see the last upload date for a story you like being "100 days ago," but we're still making our way there slowly! Besides, the most tender dishes are the ones that boil slowly~
As always, I hope you enjoy reading! :D
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Fanart: The Brightest Star in the Night Sky, by u/Frostedscales
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Note: This is a Fanfic of the Nature of Predators series by u/Spacepaladin15, that is being reposted from the NatureofPredators sub. Please support the original content.
Thank you to Philodox on discord for proofreading and editing RfD.
Thank you to Pampanope on reddit for the cover art.
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Memory Transcript Subject: Sylvan, Venlil Citizen
Date: [Standardized Human Time]: December 13, 2136
​
“Everything’s good to go over here, Kenta! How about you?”
“Fine on my end too boss! Though I still don’t know how to feel about how I’ve arranged the sandwiche– err… sylvanas. Cucumber salad next to blueberry? They kind of don’t match…”
“I already told you a million times, they look fine!”
“You sure…?”
“I’m sure! Now are you ready to start this thing?”
“Ready!”
“Then let’s go!”
I shut the door to the kitchen, making sure that I had not left anything behind that would be needed for the day, then began wheeling out the final cart of amenities. As I rolled it down the wooden floor of my emptied out diner, one long serving tray jostled back and forth across the surface top.
I looked down to recap my inventory. A motley of sylvanas cleanly cut into triangles lay in an ornate pattern atop a decorative bed of raw ipsom grain stalks, spiraling around the edges of the plate as it creeped its way closer to the center. The sylvanas were split into clear groups based not only on their filling, but of the colour of that filling as well, creating a literal rainbow of flavours to choose from. By all means, it was an absolutely marvelous display of art; a visual performance that I had no idea could be captured in something like a dish to be served at such a quaint event. Kenta, however, seemed to still be worrying over it.
Despite it apparently being part of the name according to my translator, the Terran fruit named “blueberry” was actually a deep shade of indigo rather than blue, especially when crushed into a form of jam. As a result, lacking any blue to connect the various green options of our rainbow to that of the very limited indigo, Kenta had ended up spending much too long worrying over such a minute detail.
‘What a dummy…’ I thought back to myself with a slight chuckle. ‘I guess he’s worrying about this just as much as I am.’
Hardly two or three steps remained between the food cart and the diner’s entrance. Hastily, I jogged up to the front door to prop it open. However, when I went to turn the handle, I felt it give way without even the slightest push. Someone was pulling it from the other side, causing me to be yanked forward and stumble. Looking up, I saw the rusty figure of Fehnel standing impatiently in the doorway.
“You almost done in here, Sylvan?” she asked in a hurried breath. “Here, let me help you with that.”
Before hearing my response, Fehnel had already grabbed ahold on the cart and began pulling it outside without delay. I let go and didn’t attempt to stop her, knowing full well the farm woman was likely much stronger than I. In a blur, she was already far from the door, and I began jogging after her in an attempt to keep up.
Just as the day before, the Inverter was powered on and running perfectly. The metal pylon let out a slight, continuous hum as it projected an energetic beam from its center, which split at the apex around the height of the Lackadaisy and fell down in a parabolic curve, creating a tangible anti-gravity field in its wake.
Just outside the field, it became immediately clear just how necessary this piece of advanced Federation technology was. Beyond the radiant dome, a thick rain riddled the sky and drowned the world it fell unto. A harsh wind howled and distant thunder roared, which combined with the rain to push against the field to no avail. Within, where so many confectionaries, decorations, and other preparations had been so carefully placed, not even the paw of Solgalick could disrupt us.
“You know this would be goin’ a lot faster if I could jus’ start grabbin’ the food ma’self,” Fehnel commented in a tone too preoccupied to be annoyed.
As I ran after the hauling Yotul, I tried to say, “Fehnel, I’d really appreciate it if you would–”
“I know, I know,” she interrupted back, seemingly distant. “You want me to ‘not go into the diner during the event.’ Listen Sylvan, I get that Kahnta back there is a fainter, but don’t you think that this is a tad extreme? We’re on a tight schedule here, y’know?”
“I know… it’s just kind of a golden rule. I can’t stress to you enough how important it is that nobody does so much as peak in there,” I reiterated as I jogged alongside the speeding Yotul. “And don’t worry. Once everything starts, then you can feel free to socialize and spend the day with your daughter. I’ll take care of restocking the food.”
“I suppose that’s awful nice of ya,” Fehnel breathed out. “Sure you won’t be tirin’ yourself out, hun?”
I shrugged. “Eh. How fast could people possibly eat? It’ll be fine.”
“Careful there. Don’t wanna be sprintin’ before your legs catch up,” Fehnel chuckled. “But I’m plenty thankful for the confidence. I’ll try to hold ya to your word.”
As we moved, I was able to take a brief second to look around. I began to marvel at how far the event had come since its initial inception. And under such short time restrictions as well! Through a combination of both the Lacakdaisy’s furniture, as well as a number of decorations that I had rented, we had ended up with something that I had truly considered exemplary. In traditional Venlil style, a forest of various greenery had been set out in a colourful array of paw-crafted pots and other containers. Small bushels, flowers, a few overhanging trees, and other vegetation stood proudly within. From each, incandescent ornaments of various hues emerged in a bright and brazen display. All of which combined to transform the normally secluded street atmosphere into one that was truly cozy, if not just the slightest bit packed within the bubble. In accordance with one of Fehnel’s initial requests, we had even arranged for a small wooden stage to be brought in, which fit neatly against… something that I would rather not look at…
Of course, decorations aside, one of the most enrapturing displays was that of the food itself. Positioned at various places all around the event’s area, tables upon tables of buffet items had been laid out. It was a marvelous display on all fronts. From the generously sized serving bowls of pasta, plates of still steaming gyoza, and the diverse types and variations of strayu laid in motley rows all throughout, the feast was like a colourful microcosm of everything Kenta and I had been working towards.
But what was even more impressive were all the new additions Kenta had made. Just as expected, my wayward chef had taken the original request and spun it on its tail, seemingly pulling no stops when it came to expanding our already diverse arrangement. From end to end, small, round discs of strayu called “Danishes” lay against each other down the side of one of the tables. Most impressively, the center of each had been filled in with various hues of jam, in a similar style to that of the sylvanas that I was currently wheeling towards it.
On the other side of the same table, a sundry of embellished wooden bowls sat parallel, each filled with various kinds of Venlilian-style salads. I had taken the time to teach him such recipes a good while back, but while at first these seemed to be rather unostentatious, a quick look revealed that Kenta had added his own twist to the otherwise typical mix of local produce. Tossed about each salad were dozens of small strayu cubes called “Croutons,” each baked until crisp and crunchy. What’s more, if the olfactory receptor in my mouth didn’t deceive me, I had even picked up the heavenly aroma of something Kenta had only introduced to me recently as “Garlic,” which had clearly been infused into the cubes.
On another table, steaming crocks of both soups and stews had been laid out for guests to self serve. But in lieu of a bowl, Kenta had elected to do something truly unique. It had taken me a moment to process his idea at first, but hollowed out husks of rotund strayu loaves had been left out for guests to grab, in which they were supposed to fill the “bread bowls” – as Kenta had called them – with the soup and eat them as normal. This even came with the advantage of being able to tear off small pieces of the now soup-soaked strayu, allowing one to enjoy the taste of both simultaneously. This idea, I had soon realized, would be the hardest to explain to any confused guests that might happen by.
As we approached the soup table, Fehnel and I began loading up the cart-full of sylvanas we had brought over onto a free area. We placed them right next to one other new recipe that Kenta had decided to share. A simple display of thinly cut slices of crunchy, lightly seasoned strayu, with a bright red sauce readied next to it that I instantly recognized as being the product of tomatoes mixed with oil. According to Kenta, these “Bruschetta” were a simple, yet simultaneously alluring appetizer, which would do well to pair with the soup he had stirred up.
Once the sylvanas had been laid out, Fehnel felt the urge to ask, “Is that the last of it?”
“Yes, for now,” I replied, absentmindedly stretching my back. “This’ll cover the initial rush of hungry people, I assume. But Kahnta’s already busy working on seconds.”
“Gotta say Sylvan, this is quite the impressive spread,” Fehnel said with a quick, delighted wag of the tail. “Y’know… When I asked for somethin’ new, I wasn’t expectin’ Kahnta over there to whip up so much.”
“Oh this isn’t the new dish you asked for,” I answered flatly. “That’s still being worked on.”
Fehnel froze solid, only her ears remaining seemingly automotive as they slowly shifted towards me. “Wait… what?
“Yeah all of this is just the appetizer according to Kahnta,” I explained, messing with a few arrant sylvanas that had broken symmetry. “There’s going to be one more plate of food that should be coming out shortly. And then dessert after that.”
“That’s… surely somethin’...” was all Fehnel could say. She opened her mouth as if to continue her train of thought, only to have something else pull her attention away.
Peering out into the stormy weather of the darkened town, an eye-catchingly large herd of people were making their way towards the bright dome that sketched our event’s area. Silhouettes of familiar patrons and wayward newcomers alike huddled under their umbrellas. All the while, an excited murmur hummed throughout the air, despite the noise of the rain around them. The guests were here, and they seemed excited.
I peered down at a small data pad. “Oh, second-sun already? Looks like we just barely made it on time.”
Fehnel simply wagged in acknowledgment, still the slightest bit flabbergasted.
I nudged her side, which seemed to knock her out of her trance. “Want to go greet them?”
Taking one look at me, then peering back at the ensemble of strange and alien foods behind her, one of Fehnel’s ears flicked a little. Then, she did the tail equivalent of a Human shrug, letting out a pleased chuckle. Whatever had been on her mind was apparently pushed to the side for now. “Heh, of course hun. Let’s treat ‘em to somethin’ special.”
With a newfound kick in her already hastened step, Fehnel began to proudly jog over towards the approaching crowd. By now, we could already begin to make out some faces, each looking more curious than the last.
In addition to the Brachistochrone Inverter itself, Jeela had also taken the liberty to have a reception area installed in the form of a metallic tunnel about the width of three Venlil. The tunnel seemed to fold and bend the anti-gravity energy around it, allowing for people to easily enter the repulsion field without having to tread through a torrent of redirected rainwater. Additionally, a series of hooks alongside the interior of the tunnel also served as a convenient area for the storage of umbrellas and coats, which our guests quickly began making use of the moment they started funneling through.
Fehnel and I stood at the side of the entrance, welcoming in guest after guest with the appropriate propriety. At first, many of them were stymied in their step, staring in awe at the sanctuary-like atmosphere that had been created in the middle of the street. But almost as soon as they got their bearings, most realigned their immediate priorities, and subsequently made a beeline for the buffet tables. That’s what they were here for, after all. Hopefully they’d come to appreciate the actual reason Fehnel was hosting this event soon enough.
As we busied ourselves, the voices of many excited guests made themselves audible.
“I’ve been looking forward to this!”
“Look at the decorations!”
“I feel like I’m in the Capital!”
“Are you sure all of this is free?”
“The ad said it was! Either way, I need to try some of this!”
Fehnel and I watched in delight as the crowd began to form around the tables, a number of plates I had left out disappearing as fast as the eye could blink. However, it was clear that a majority of the attention received had been focussed solely on the more familiar menu items already offered by the Lackadaisy.
“Think they’re gonna touch any of the new stuff?” Fehnel idly commented, her attention still fixed on the crowd. “It’d be a shame if any of it goes to waste.”
“Oh they will,” I answered without hesitation. “Just give them a moment. They’ll be all over it soon enough.”
Fehnel laughed. “You sound awful confident, don’tcha?”
“Oh please, this is hardly the first time I’ve served some wacky new thing to my customers,” I answered back with a chuckle of my own. “If anything, at this point I’d say I’m quite the expert. Just watch. You’ll see.”
Like clockwork, my precognitive claim had been proven true mere moments later. Some soul amongst the table’s crowd had seemingly been more curious than the rest, and ended up taste-testing one of the bruschetta. It was hard to make out from this distance, but if I had to guess, her ears had perked up and her eyes had widened in surprise. What was made clear, however, was their opinion of the new food, because only a few moments later could their voice be heard.
“You have got to try some of this stuff!” she practically yelled at anyone who would listen. “It tastes like the red stuff that’s on the pasta, but like… even stronger! It’s so good I feel like I died and am one with the Stars already!”
Like a Farsul unto a library, the crowd collectively swiveled their ears and began to gravitate towards the bruschetta with eager eyes. A few more voices piped up in glee, each more delighted than the last as paw after paw descended on the strayu until there was nothing scarce of crumbs left.
‘Guess that’ll be the first thing I’ll need to restock,’ I thought with a passive wave of the tail, before a sudden realization crept into my mind. ‘Ugh… Kenta and I might be busier today than I thought…’
It wasn’t long before the elation of trying something new, mixed with the sudden and devastating lack of bruschetta, had urged our party guests to move on to the other, never before seen options that laid out to fill their fancy. All at once, the wall of wool and fluff had spread out the slightest bit as fresher waters were explored. Plates were filled with various salads, despite the unfamiliar bits of crunchy strayu inside raising some skeptical ears. Helping after helping of the technicolour pastries were reached for as well, with the sylvanas not lasting much longer after that. And most impressively, it seemed that people had quickly begun to figure out the concept of Kenta’s cute “bread bowl” idea as well, even without instruction.
That last turn of events had actually caught me the slightest bit off guard. For the bread bowls being quite possibly the most unique aspect of the event – well, that I knew of – I found myself rather impressed by how fast people were getting the hang of it. Sure, it meant that I wouldn’t have to bother myself with having to go around explaining it to everybody, but in my eyes, there was a bit more to it than that. Perhaps it was a case of grasping at straws, but for the briefest moment, it made me wonder whether or not Humanity’s ideas had been affecting my people more than I had realized. Perhaps, if only in the slightest, Kenta had been opening their minds to more unique ideas than I had given him credit for. Without the slightest bit of hesitancy, the partygoers did well to experiment with more than the obvious, quickly wrapping their minds around something completely new and extraordinary.
I exhaled a short-breathed snicker, shaking the thought out of my head. ‘Calm down there, Sylvan. It’s just some soup and a piece of strayu shaped like a bowl. No need to get all philosophical about it. Still, I guess them figuring it out saves me some time. Good, cause it looks like I already need to start stocking the next round…’
I moved to grab my cart so that I could head back inside, only to have Fehnel call out and grab my attention instead.
“Sylvan, hun,” she began. “Before you go makin’ yourself scarce. I think there’s somethin’ about this here party that you haven’t explained yet.”
My head turned out to face her. “Hm?”
“Now, don’t get me wrong… What you did here is great and all. By all means, whenever it is that Kadew decides to show up here with that date of hers, I’m sure she’ll start coming around to the idea of my peoples’ Runnin’ Day. But…”
I now realized that Fehnel was completely focussed on something off in the distance.
“Oh,” I replied. “That…”
I had done well to ignore it up until this point. In fact, if I tried hard enough, I was even able to keep it completely hidden from my peripheral. But the truth was, no matter where I went or what I did to distract myself, there was no denying that it was there – that She was there.
At the opposite end of the dome, an onyx terror lurked over the ignorant, complacent masses. Its wicked enormity great, and the pressure about it even greater. The form it took was terrifying. An alien pose, unknown to the mind, originated from a people feared by many. Its peering eyes descended as domineering malevolence. And from its onyx chassis, a message rang clear as a day personally forged by Solgalick themself: Even if I couldn’t see her; if I shielded herself from my sight all day… No matter what, She could always see me.
“I’m gonna be honest Sylvan, I did not take you as someone that had a thing for Magister Jeela.”
I shot back quicker than a bolt of lighting. “I DO NOT HAVE A ‘THING’ FOR–” before stopping myself short.
Luckily, my voice had not been noticed among the now loud, chattering crowd about us. Which was good. I was pretty sure that my voice had cracked into an almost childishly high pitch. Taking a deep breath, I yanked my composure back, and stuffed an air of professionalism back into my voice yet again.
“I a-appologize…” I mumbled out, my head shrinking between my shoulders.
“No worries!” Fehnel replied. She couldn’t help but let a few chuckles pour into her voice. “I was just teasin’ is all. But seriously, you’re gonna have to whip up a pretty darn good explanation… Else I’m boutta start thinkin’ that what I just said was true.”
I took a deep breath, which soon shifted into a long-winded sigh. “Listen… It was part of the deal, alright? I’m not proud of it, but it’s there now, and unless you’ve got a herd of Mazic heavylifters at the beck and call, I can’t get rid of it.”
“Part of the deal?” Fehnel repeated.
“It’s my end of the bargain for us being able to have this Inverter during the event. And no, before you ask, it was not worth it,” I explained.
I could do nothing but feel immense shame for the inconvenience. To have something so overbearing, so shamelessly grandstanding placed in the middle of what was supposed to be a quaint event about cross-cultural understanding… It was beyond disrespectful to Fehnel’s original request. It took something that the poor woman had been planning for who knew how long, and brutally morphed it into a shadow of its former self. Into nothing but an ego trip for a politician that probably already surrounded themselves with weed biters and paw lickers.
“Listen…” I said, lowering both my tail and ears in respect. “Fehnel, I apologize profusely for allowing that thing to be placed here. I should have put my paw down and just hosted the event inside like we planned. But it’s too late now. I’m really sorry…”
But to my surprise, Fehnel had not been paying attention to my display of humility. Instead, her focus was still on that of the statue.
“I think it looks neat!” she said in a cheery tone.
“Y-you do?” I mumbled back.
“Well yeah!” She wagged her tail to assure me. “Sure it’s a bit, err… unconventional… But I think it’s got quite a bit of charm to it!”
“That’s… one way of saying it…”
“Besides, it might not be the worst thing to have somethin’ from the Magisters here with us,” Fehnel continued to think out loud. “Sorta gives this whole event a kinda official feel, y’know? Like it’s lettin’ everyone here know that the Yotul have got just as much right bein’ under the same heedin’ ears of the Governor as anyone else. Sure, dependin’ on where you are and who you ask, that may or may not be a good thing. But it at least means it’s harder to ignore us now. Heck, might even convince some of the people ‘round here to open up a little to the other parts of us.”
“Well… so long as you’re happy with it, I suppose?” I worded awkwardly.
If I had been completely honest with myself, I was expecting the slightest bit more… Well, I wasn’t sure. Perhaps anger? Annoyance? Unrelenting grief that invariably led to locking yourself in a closet, crying? But there was no sign of that in the rusty Yotul’s eyes. As she stared up at the onyx marvel, I couldn’t help but feel as though there was no sign of the negativity I had anticipated in the slightest. Instead, all that remained was that of a solemn pride. Maybe she was lying to herself. Like it was some sort of coping mechanism that helped her work around this unwelcome development in her plans. But regardless, the end result remained. And I was left feeling relieved at being able to avoid yet another hurdle.
‘Fehnel really knows how to look at the optimistic side of things, I guess… Good. I could really use some more of that around here.’
“Feel free to run along now, Sylvan,” she said, waving me a satisfied flick of the tail. “I’ll keep waitin’ here so I can greet the other guests. And I do hope you and Kahnta can bring out the main course whenever it’s ready. I wanna make sure everything’s ready to blow Kadew’s fur off whenever she decides to get here.”
I had to force myself not to flash a Human smile in return. She and the rest of the partygoers had no idea what was coming. And to a certain extent, neither did I. He did mention he had some sort of “surprise” coming, after all. But I always trusted Kenta for his word, and knowing what my chef was capable of, it never occurred to me once that it wouldn’t live up to the expectations. In fact, I was counting on him to exceed them.
I turned around and headed back to the kitchen. It was time to get the real party started.
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FIA F2

Emilia-Romagna Grand Prix - Sprint Race

F1FS Wiki: FIA F2 Guide 2024 Drivers & Teams 2024 Calendar

Session Times

Friday-Sunday times are in CEST (UTC+2:00)

• Practice: Fri 17 May 2024, 11:05 (UTC+2)
• Qualifying: Fri 17 May 2024, 16:00 (UTC+2)
• Sprint Race: Sat 18 May 2024, 14:15 (UTC+2)
• Feature Race: Sun 19 May 2024, 10:00 (UTC+2)

You can convert the session times to your local time via Timeanddate.com.
A full time table of the weekend's events can be found here: Link

Imola Circuit

Imola, Emilia-Romagna, Italy
Circuit Diagram
Length: 4.909 km (3.050 miles)
Turns: 19
Distance:

• Sprint Race: 25 laps - 122.725 km
• Feature Race: 35 laps - 171.815 km (Mandatory pit-stop)

2022

2022 Pole Time: 1:40.221 ( Juri Vips, Hitech Grand Prix)
2022 Fastest Lap:

• Sprint Race: 1:28.841 ( Juri Vips, Hitech Grand Prix)
• Feature Race: 1:28.353 ( Jehan Daruvala, Prema Racing)

2022 Winner:

• Sprint Race: Marcus Armstrong, Hitech Grand Prix
• Feature Race: Theo Pourchaire, ART Grand Prix

2024

2024 Pole Time:
2024 Fastest Lap:

• Sprint Race:
• Feature Race:

2024 Winner:

• Sprint Race:
• Feature Race:

Provisional Starting Grid

The Formula 2 page on FIA.com
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Live Timing & Streaming

The FIA F2 championship has its own official Live Timing services.

• Live Timing: Here.
• List of Broadcasting Channels: Here

F1FS Guide

New to FIA Formula 2? You can read our dedicated guide HERE, or watch our video guide from 2019 HERE!

Twitter & Discord

For up to date information regarding this series, follow these Twitter accounts:

• FIA F2 Twitter: @Formula2
• F1FS Twitter: @F1FeederSeries

We have a Discord server for the subreddit, check it out here: Link

On-Demand Race Replays

You can access previous races of this series and more here: F1FS Race Replays

Championship Standings

Full championship standings here: Link

Date	Stage	Route	Length	Type	Time
Sat. May 18	14	Castiglione delle Stiviere>Desenzano del Garda	31,2 km	ITT	ca. 17:15 CET

Information	Official Site / Startlist / Roadbook / Inrng overview stage profiles
Social Media	Twitter / Facebook / Instagram
Overall Previews	INRNG / CyclingNews / GCN
/peloton content	Pre-Race thread / Cheat Notes / RFL / SRFL / SWL / GTP / TFTPT
Live Trackers	Official / Cycling News
TV	Eurosport/GCN+ / Check your local broadcaster here / Race Coverage starts at 12:45 [CEST](http://www.timebie.com/std/centraleuropeansummer.php?q=XX12

• For a live chat way to discuss/follow the race we have a discord too!

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FIA Formula 3 Emilia-Romagna Grand Prix - Sprint Race

F1FS Wiki: FIA Formula 3 Guide 2024 Drivers & Teams 2024 Calendar

Session Times

Friday-Sunday times are in CEST (UTC+2:00)

• Practice: Fri 17 May 2024, 09:55 (UTC+2)
• Qualifying: Fri 17 May 2024, 15:05 (UTC+2)
• Sprint Race: Sat 18 May 2024, 10:05 (UTC+2)
• Feature Race: Sun 19 May 2024, 08:30 (UTC+2)

You can convert the session times to your local time via Timeanddate.com.
A full time table of the weekend's events can be found here: Link

Imola Circuit

Imola, Emilia-Romagna, Italy
Circuit Diagram
Length: 4.909 km (3.050 miles)
Turns: 19
Distance:

• Sprint Race: 18 Laps - 88.362 km
• Feature Race: 22 Laps - 107.998 km

2022

2022 Pole Time: 1:41.180 ( Zane Maloney, Trident)
2022 Fastest Lap:

• Sprint Race: 1:33.573 ( Ollie Bearman, Prema Racing)
• Feature Race: 1:33.129 ( Roman Stanek, Trident)

2022 Winner:

• Sprint Race: Franco Colapinto, Van Amersfoort Racing
• Feature Race: Roman Stanek, Trident

2024

2024 Pole Time:
2024 Fastest Lap:

• Sprint Race:
• Feature Race:

2024 Winner:

• Sprint Race:
• Feature Race:

Provisional Starting Grid

The Formula 3 page on FIA.com

Live Timing & Streaming

The FIA Formula 3 series has its own official Live Timing services.

• Live Timing: Here.
  
• List of Broadcasting Channels: Here
  

F1FS Guide

New to FIA Formula 3? You can watch our dedicated video guide that introduces the series HERE!

Twitter

For up to date information regarding this series, follow these Twitter accounts:

• FIA Formula 3 Twitter: @Formula3
• F1FS Twitter: @F1FeederSeries

Discord

We have a Discord server for the subreddit, check it out here: Link

On-Demand Race Replays

You can access previous races of this series here: 2024 FIA Formula 3 Championship Race Replays

Championship Standings

Full championship standings here: Link

Race Information

• Name: BMO Vancouver Marathon 2024
• Date: May 5th, 2024
• Distance: 26.2 miles
• Location: Vancouver, BC
• Website: https://bmovanmarathon.ca/
• Strava: https://www.strava.com/activities/11341057303
• Time: 3:33:31

Goals

Goal	Description	Completed?
A	Sub 3:20	No
B	Sub 3:30	No
C	PB (Sub 3:34)	Barely

Splits

Mile	Time
1	7:39
2	7:30
3	7:51
4	7:51
5	7:51
6	8:11
7	8:58
8	8:25
9	8:14
10	8:07
11	7:54
12	7:49
13	7:40
14	8:14
15	8:29
16	8:15
17	8:10
18	8:18
19	8:21
20	8:10
21	7:40
22	7:46
23	7:36
24	7:58
25	8:10
26	7:38
26.2	7:02

Training

My last marathon was Toronto back in October, where I ran 3:34 (race report here).
I mostly followed whatever Garmin's auto-suggested runs were. My goal since last summer has primarily been to improve my aerobic pace with Z2 running. Comparing my HR during runs now to last year seems to indicate I've seen a lot of improvement there, and I can feel that. Another goal of mine since my last race was to work on strength after having issues with my adductors and glute, but I don't think I quite followed through on that. For the first few months of the year I was okay about going to the gym and doing leg curls, split squats, and core work, but I kind of fell out of the habit eventually. I also went to a few strength training classes that would leave me sore for several days, but I need to do that more often to really build on it; I did feel my hamstrings were stronger from doing deadlifts and step-downs.
In some of my long runs I wore a vest and had the idea that maybe I'll carry a vest during the race this time so that I could always have hydration and even add some pomegranate juice/coconut water to a flask for easy access to carbs and electrolytes. This worked well, but I ultimately decided after the training runs that the bouncing would be too annoying, I would sweat more because of the vest, and I am pretty good about drinking lots of water outside of running.
I didn't do a lot of speed work in my training, but when I did up the intensity, I noticed I would sometimes feel some tightness on the right side of my chest, which is an issue I had in high school. At the time I was worried it was a heart issue, but I got a lot of tests done to indicate there were no issues. The issue is that I don't change up how I breathe between easy runs (long, slow breaths) and hard runs. I think I need to breathe more intensely to avoid diaphragm tightness, and more speed training will help with that.
My shoe rotation was Saucony Triumph 20s as my daily trainers, Kinvara 13s as my speed shoe, and I picked up a pair of Endorphin Speed 3s from Winners for $60 a few months ago which I've been using for speed and long runs, which complement my Endorphin Pro 3 race shoes.
My Garmin race prediction was 3:19. My personal feeling was that I could achieve that goal if it was a flat race, but I was skeptical on how I would perform on the course. I looked up other race reviews, watched a video of the race, and tried to think about how I would handle the hills, but knew that I didn't have enough experience to not have it be a factor.

Pre-race

Flight and Expo

Two Fridays before the race I did Anaerobic intervals and that was probably a mistake because my adductor was sore for over 4 days after that. I probably still felt the effects of that on race day.
I did my 5k shakeout run in my race shoes Friday morning. I had leftover pasta before leaving for the airport in the late afternoon. I flew to Vancouver on in the evening, arriving at night.
On Saturday, I went to the grocery store immediately after waking up since it was closed after we arrived the night before. The main things I got for myself that were race-relevant were gluten free quick oats, coconut water, apple and orange juice, honey, sunflower seed butter, soy milk, and a carton of cold brew coffee.
I went to the expo to get my bib before we got lunch in Gastown. We went to MeeT, and I got the Philly Cheezesteak Poutine and Oyster Mushroom Calamari which I shared with my GF. They had an issue with my friend's order so they offered him a free dessert which he was nice enough to share, so I got to have a bit of his brownie too!
After lunch I recommended everyone check out Stanley Park on their own so I could go home and rest my legs. I stopped by Nesters to pick up a GF Caulipower Pizza for dinner to have with some juice. My blood sugar spiked from the poutine at lunch, so I took some insulin to correct that, pre-emptively took insulin for the pizza I was about to have, and took a nap. After that, I put the pizza in the AirBnB's toaster oven (on top of some foil to avoid cross-contamination), but this ended up being a mistake. We discovered later in the week that the toaster oven stops working after a minute or two. When I ate my pizza I noticed it was a bit soft but figured it may have just been the texture: now I know it was likely undercooked, and I feel stupid for not realizing that.

Race Day

The start time for the marathon was 8:30am and I was in the first corral. I woke up at 5:30am and had my oatmeal (quick oats microwaved in water, a spoon of sunflower seed butter, splash of soy milk, superseed blend (chia, hemp, and toasted buckwheat groats), and honey), and a tall glass of cold brew coffee + soy milk. Shortly after waking up I realized I had an upset stomach, so naturally I started feeling stressed that I would have GI issues during the race (see comments about the pizza above). We worried that I may have accidentally ingested gluten due to my group of 7 having gluten in my vicinity, not realizing it was probably the pizza. I had to use the washroom a few times, and hoped it would pass. I had a 500ml bottle of nuun with water mixed with orange juice that I sipped on for the next hour since I saw a Ben Parker video where he did that. Thankfully I wasn't stuck in the bathroom all morning, but I was worried I would feel sick during the race.
With me I brought:

• 5 Huma gels (I don't recall if any of them were caffeinated, but it was Blueberry, Chocolate, and Mocha flavours). I had 2 left after the race.
• 2 Larabars (1 cashew cookie, 1 peanut butter chocolate chip)
• A pack of salt tabs (I'd never taken one but got a free sample at the SF marathon and wanted to have them in case I cramped up for emergency purposes)
• Insulin pump and phone (wish I didn't need to carry a pump with me but it is what it is)
• GF cookies and cream Honey Stinger waffle
• A ziploc bag with two Gravels in case of stomach issues

I was staying in Mount Pleasant and wasn't close to a SkyTrain station. It would have been a 45 minute walk to the start line, but I intended to walk to Main Street and take the 8am bus going south (I originally meant to take the 7:45 bus but my stomach problems delayed my exit). I got to the stop at 7:55, saw a bus approach a few minutes later thinking it was mine, but it said "Sorry, not in service." Oh well, I thought, it'll probably come in a minute. A few minutes pass and no bus came. A different one did that wasn't the one I needed to take. I checked the Transit app and the bus I needed to get on was showing as having already passed. I guess it was the "not in service" one? Maybe it was full? I asked some people at the bus stop who looked like they were spectators, and they were also confused. We ended up walking from there, but I jogged since I needed to get to the start line with some time to spare. During the jog I could tell that my muscles were really tight, which didn't give me a lot of confidence about how the race would do go. I still made it to the start area around 8:15. I stood in line at one of the porta-potties and did my dynamic warm-up routine while waiting. I just made it out of there at 8:28 and rushed over to the start line while gobbling down on my Honey Stinger Waffle and taking a bit of insulin since my blood sugar was already a bit high. Unfortunately, I hastily got into the start line area wherever I could, and I ended up 3 or 4 corrals after the first. I tried as hard as I could to squeeze between people as politely as possible to try and get to my corral. Unfortunately I just missed it, so I ended up being at the front of the 2nd corral, which was fine given what my final time was; I just wish I hadn't wasted energy trying to rush to the front around everyone.

Race

1-6

I started feeling pretty strong, but I also know that my HR takes some time to go up when I start my runs, so I knew I would get cocky in the beginning. My dynamic warm up helped loosen up my glutes and hips, which I was worried about when I jogged to the start line, but immediately when the run started I could feel tightness in my hamstring. Not a great sign but I tried not to focus on it and accept that it's race time so I'll just have to do my best.
I was worried about the hills going in because I didn't do a lot of hill training, and I suck at running down hills. I understand that I simultaneously shouldn't run downhill too quickly to avoid bonking later on, but I also need to use the steady downhills to make up for the time I was going to lose on the climb at Cambie. I went to my physio a few weeks before the race and told her about how I feel tightness in my knee when I run downhill; she helped make adjustments and gave me exercises to do to help my knee feel more comfortable on downhills; they definitely helped, but I still don't have the right technique for running downhill optimally in a way that doesn't cause me to waste energy slowing myself down. I was a little bit ahead of pace by the time I got to the dreaded hill.

7-13

The hill obviously sucked, but that was expected. It was stressful to go slow and have my heart rate go so high, but I tried to keep a consistent cadence going up. At the top of the hill I had a hard time bringing my HR down while maintaining a decent pace. It looks like it took me a few miles after the sharp ascent before I got back to target pace. My hamstring hurting didn't help with this.
The scenery was beautiful and hearing all the positivity around me helped keep my spirits up. After having a gel and trying to pick up the pace a bit I could feel my stomach starting to rumble, so I took one of my gravols and slowed down. I figured they take time to have effect so I wanted to take them early.
I spent a lot of the race alone, which was nice when I would pass by spectators calling my name. It was nice to hear people cheering me on and comment how I wasn't even breaking a sweat. There was a jazz band playing before we arrived at UBC which was awesome to hear.
Right before the halfway mark was a steep downhill. I tried my best to avoid speeding up too much because there was still a lot of race to go. The views of the mountains at the turn were beautiful.

14-21

I started feeling a bit discouraged because my heart rate was in the 170s even though I wasn't going too fast, but my legs were still hurting from the beginning. I read online about how the Burrard Street bridge is brutal and the part of the race where many people hit the wall, so my mind was entirely on that. I also asked my friends to be at the bridge; they already had to go downtown at 9am to see the half marathoners finish and to get one of the people staying with us to his 8k start line at 9:30am. I didn't check my phone during the race but I would see Whatsapp notifications pop up on my watch, and it gave me motivation to see that they were on the way, and also comment on how fast I was going :)
I don't think I had trouble going through the bridge, which motivated me. I also saw a notification saying "we are at the end of the bridge" so I was prepared for that. I saw my friends, gave them a high five, and picked up my pace probably a bit too much 😅
I felt strong going into Stanley Park, but read about how it could be brutal, and was nervous about my HR being in the high 170s already.

21 - Finish

I was mentally prepared for Stanley Park. I was expecting it to be completely dead, but that was not the case for the first half of the Seawall with the aid and cheer stations. The second-half was definitely quiet, but I had my Shokz on playing some music that was fitting for the scenery (Amenra and Septicflesh). It was a bit hard to pick up the pace as the course was a bit tight but I was able to do so. I saw some bloodshed though; one woman was completely covered in a foil blanket with a vested individual standing over her on his phone, one man on a bench with his arm dangling who may have been unresponsive, with some staff rushing back in his direction after I passed him, and one person who started cramping, moved to the side yelling "Fuck!" I yelled at him "You got his!" but immediately realized that maybe those weren't the right words for someone who was cramping up. Not sure what I should have said, though. I started cramping up a tiny bit, my pump was complaining that my blood sugar was dropping, and so I decided to take a gel because I figured it had some electrolytes, and it had been a half hour since my last one. In retrospect I think perhaps a salt tab would have been more useful, but I didn't want to do anything new on race day, even if I only had just over a mile left.
After we left Stanley Park, I felt fine enough to kick up the pace. I saw my friends during the finish and they got some great pictures of me. I was disappointed at how close I was to not PB'ing but at least I reached that milestone. Finishing strong had me feeling like I was holding back elsewhere during the race.

Post-race

I got my medal and felt fine walking to bag check. I picked up a banana and a bottle of the fancy bottled water on the way. I felt sad passing by the sandwiches I couldn't eat. There were also bags of chips that I feel really stupid for skipping. For some reason I scanned the bag for a GF label, but I found out a week later that the brand they had was gluten-free: the GF logo was on the top left, and for some reason I didn't check there.
I passed by a change tent on the way, so I went back there after getting my bag. I put on my hoodie, while bending down to take off my shoes my right adductor started cramping very intensely. I asked someone who was sitting close to me if I could steal their chair and I sat down. I text my friends letting them know I'm in the tent but had a crazy cramp and so was going to take some time to get up. I munched on the banana I had and took a salt cap that I thankfully still had on me. It felt like it took forever but it was probably only 10 minutes until I was able to stand up and lean against a table again to continue putting on my joggers and sandals. It was raining lightly, which was a bit annoying since I was wearing socks with sandals, but it wasn't too heavy. I met up with my friends, got some pictures, and we headed out.
Unfortunately, one of my friends in the group was made aware on Little Red Book that the Lululemon stores downtown had a deal for that day only to get 20% off our purchase if you show your medal/bib. We ended up going to Lululemon 3 times because I'm bad at saying no, so it took a while to get home. We did go to Nuba in Yaletown for lunch which was really good. That night we went to East is East for dinner, which was nice, though in hindsight I should have realized that the loud music made it not the best choice when what I wanted was to feel relaxed and cozy.
We stayed in Vancouver for an extra week and we flew back on the 12th. It was a wonderful stay and I felt depressed coming back. I wish I could have gone on more hikes and even gone trail running through all the beautiful trails in the area.

Retrospective

• I think I ran too conservatively because I was worried about stomach issues (valid given the morning). I needed more electrolytes, though. Overall the race felt easier than Toronto, so it was frustrating that I didn't get a bit closer to my goal time.
• I also wonder how I would have performed if I ran slower in the first half. I know that's the recommendation, but part of me felt like slowing down on some of the downhills would have required me to adjust my form and engage muscles in a way that could have wasted energy. Something to consider for next time, though.
• I wore half tights this time as I had issues with my shorts falling down too much in Toronto. Surprisingly I had that issue this time too! I guess it's a combination of my race belt weighing my shorts down (maybe I should wear it higher?), the weight of Larabars, phone, and pump in my shorts weighing them down (I'm pretty sure I trained like this though), and me losing over 7 lbs in training that caused this. Not sure what I'll do for the next race beyond do more practice in race gear to see what adjustments I need to make.
• I feel like I didn't do a lot of speed work this time around, and any time I did anaerobic runs my adductor would be very sore, so I need to improve my strength there and really build up my speed again. I also need to focus on how I breathe when working hard instead of worrying about breathing in through my mouth too much. My watch would cancel out speed workouts often times because of my lack of sleep and because of my bike commutes and volleyball sessions, so I need to start planning out my own workouts instead of being too much of a slave to my watch's suggestions.
• I'll stop using Kinvara 13s as speed shoes; I'll wear them for some easy runs maybe, or even transition them to daily walkers/gym shoes. I have the Endorphin Speed 3s for speed work now. I also got a pair of Kinvara 14s from Winners for about $50, and the increased cushioning in them might be less likely to cause excessive soreness after doing fast intervals.
• I liked eating Larabars for energy. I am considering continuing with that and also perhaps making my own gels (mostly maple syrup, ginger, salt, and lemon juice is what I'm thinking, perhaps with some chia seeds or subbing for honey) to bring in reusable containers to reduce waste, perhaps be more appealing to consume even without water, and produce less waste/stickiness. Gels also get pricey, it's annoying that Huma's + gels with electrolytes aren't available locally here, and I figure less refined sources of energy would be better than processed foods.
• I want to do dedicated hill and/or trail workouts; I should set time for myself to bike to an area close by to do those as they are fun and will definitely improve my fitness
• There are a few places in Toronto that do Hot/Cold therapy (Othership and Alter) I've been meaning to check out for almost a year. I need to stop being lazy and shy about it and just go because I think it's something I'll like, although I would probably only go once a month considering how much it costs.
• After my last marathon I felt regret that my legs were sore before the race. I tried to fix that this time but wasn't successful. I guess walking to/from work on Friday, then walking with my luggage to the train station and then walking a lot in the airport to get to the gate contributed to that. I went to the expo the next day intending not to spend too much time there, but I was with a group and the people I was with wanted to spend time at a lot of the tables so I ended up on my feet for longer than I probably should have been. I should probably also review the training I do on the last week and maybe consider not even walking to work or biking around town for errands to try and conserve myself more.
• My sleep habits are shit. I watched the Running Channel's recent video on recovering after the London Marathon and Sarah's watch showed that she would casually get over 8 hours and have a sleep score of 90, which is unimaginable to me 😭. I need to change that and intend to do so immediately.
• On the one hand I should prioritize getting to the start line earlier, but I also want to leave as late as possible to avoid having to depend on a crowded port-a-potty. I think this would not have been an issue if my stomach wasn't upset that morning.
• I want to get a running form analysis done. There are a lot of places around me that offer that service and I can get it partially covered under my physio benefits through work.

Looking Forward

I definitely feel like I can PB by a significant margin if I have more discipline in my training, sleep better, and avoid the race day issues I faced. I am still deciding where to do a Fall marathon though. I am trying to weight between what would be a fun race, what would be a good place to travel to and stay for some time after the race, and what would not be too tough of a course. I'm considering the following so far:

• Loch Ness Marathon
  • + I've seen it recommended here a lot, and the Scottish Highlands look beautiful.
  • + Traveling to Europe is nice because it's easy to travel elsewhere on the continent if I do an extended stay before heading back
  • - International travel could make it harder to have an ideal race day, and reading race reports make me nervous about how I may have to take an early bus and stand around the start line for a long time
  • - I'm not sure how good public transit in the area would be since it's rural compared to big cities. I don't like driving if I don't have to and I don't like to use taxis or rideshare
• St George, UT
  • + Downhill marathon, although I think I would prefer a flat marathon as that seems like it would be technically easier unless the decline was light.
  • + I want to explore the southwest canyons as I've never been and it would be fun to explore the hikes in the area afterwards assuming recovery isn't a problem
  • - Presumably no shade since it's down a canyon
  • - Would need a car to get everywhere. Traveling to this area would be for doing a lot of active things but if I give it my all during a marathon it could feel like an incomplete experience.
• Malaga Marathon
  • + Popular flat marathon
  • + Love Spain, but didn't visit Malaga when I went last year. Lots of gluten free food in the area
  • + It's in December, which gives me a lot of time to train and knock out some half marathons in the meantime
  • - I suck at traveling to places where I don't speak the language due to social anxiety. This could be a good way to help get over that and work on it, though.
  • - It being late means it could be a good candidate for a backup marathon in case a primary marathon doesn't go well for whatever reason
• Victoria, BC
  • + BC is beautiful. I wouldn't have to worry about language barriers, and this is a place I would be down to stay for some time after the race.
  • + The race is well-rated for beauty
  • - While not too difficult, the race has a lot of rolling hills, so it will be mildly technical the whole way through
  • - Maybe too similar to Vancouver? Should I prioritize traveling somewhere else instead of doing another week-long BC trip?

Upcoming local races I'm signed up for are a 10k in June by the waterfront, and a 10k in September on the Toronto Island. I would like to see how close I can get to 40 minutes if I wore my Endorphin Speed 3s. I'm hoping to pick training back up this week, but not ramp up too quickly.
I also want to sign up for trail races because trail running is fun. It's unfortunate how it's hard to participate without relying on a car, though.
I may do the Presidio Half Marathon in San Francisco at the end of June; I was offered free registration so long as I record and upload the race as I did for the San Francisco Marathon; it looks like flights to the area area bit pricey at this time though, so even if I stay with a friend it might be a bit too much right now.
Made with a new race report generator created by herumph.