A few days ago we fought from 1:30a till about 8am. We have lengthy arguments like this all the time. We used to date, and it played a key role in the end of our relationship along with us having different values in general. I made it clear before we started dating I can't handle much fighting, particularly yelling, because of aspects of my childhood.
✨️ TLDR AHEAD
Two fights happened on my two birthdays- or before other important things like it's the night before a road trip or I'm ON the road trip. They happen when I want to go to bed or I'm about to run an errand. He monologs for literal hours at a time, and I can't speak up when he speaks incorrectly on my part because then I'm interrupting him and that causes more issues than me being misunderstood or remembered incorrectly.
In our relationship they were often caused by me not wanting him to pay my for my phone/phone bill before we'd been dating for even 3 months, though they were also caused by me being late to coming over and stuff like that as well. Sometimes I'd accidentally fall asleep after work instead of coming over, if I lay down after a shower, which I did a few times as I worked very early in the morning, and it made him feel like I didn't value his time.
I didn't talk to him for a few months after we broke up, even though he tried to contact me to apologize several times by texting/phonecalls/visiting several times at my apartment. Eventually someone knocked on my door and I opened it before I realized it was him. I didn't want to turn him away so we talked and he very sincerely apologized and talked about how he'd been going to therapy. I could recognize a great deal of change in him and we caught up on eachothers lives.
I moved to a different state like a week after we got in contact and i am struggling with this long distance friendship. He wants to talk all the time and I.. don't. I enjoy texting but sometimes I want to watch a show or play a game uninterrupted, but if I don't respond enough he feels ignored. He also likes to talk on the phone all the time and I really really don't enjoy talking on the phone at all, especially for hours at a time. We talked every night for a couple weeks in the beginning. But after a bad fight i reminded him I don't like being on the phone and said I wanted some space, which had been on my mind prior to the argument. The next week we talk on the phone for like 3 nights for a few hours, and maybe a few other little calls here and there, but he says it's not enough
But the thing is.. even when we talked for hours every night and texted pretty often it still wasn't enough. The only time it was enough was a short window when I checked my phone pretty obsessively to make sure I didn't miss a message from him and always stopped what I was doing to take his call
If my snap score goes up when we're not talking he asks me about it. I don't know why but I feel uncomfortable explaining to him the other people I talk to in the day. And often I'm not even talking to them when I'm not talking to him- they send me snaps when I'm not on my phone. I don't respond to anyone unless I make sure I respond to him first to avoid this exact issue. I feel anxious when my friends snap me because I know my score will go up and he's going to ask me about it
For the most part, our fights presently revolve around him feeling like I don't care enough about our friendship or he's feeling ignored by me. But I really really don't know what to do anymore. I was talking on the phone for hours at a time, I was texting all the time and keeping my responses as long as possible.. I was planning movie days, etc. It was never enough.
He's upset my responses are getting shorter. And to be honest they have. Often times I talk about my life, especially someone else in my life, it triggers a fight. Not always in the moment but it always comes back to bite me in the butt later. Particularly if I'm hanging out with my roommate, because in my friends eyes he and I get to hang out with all time. Which we kind of don't- my time is far more devoted to my friend than my roomate. But even if it wasn't- I like hanging out with my roomate because we can quietly sit in the same room together, and we don't have any conflict. He is a very kind presence and I'm grateful to have him as a friend.
It's hard talking about your life while also revealing the bare minimum about your life, and so I'm responding kind of shortly about my things and just try to focus on him.
The fight we had a few days ago was about us not talking enough. Sort of. The reasons our fights go on for hours is because I don't know how to respond to him when he brings up an issue. I sincerely try my best and I try it all. When he brings something up I explain to him I understand his concerns, both using his exact words and in my own words I explain why he's upset. If I agree with him I will apologize and tell him how I'm going to fix it and I fix it, after we fight for a few hours ofc, because he doesn't believe I can understand/apologize and fix something so early into a conversation.
Other times he keeps pushing me to explain myself, but if I explain my pov, things really really blow up because I don't always agree with him. And I think he confuses me not agreeing with him to not understanding. One of our fights came because he was upset when I got home with my roommate at 1am, when I had a 3 hour drive at 8am the next morning. Which blows my mind, because he fought with me literally all night before I drove across the state. I didn't tell him that though, I said I didn't mind getting home till 1 because I had fun when I was out and will still get plenty of sleep. But we still fought.
✨️TLDR
Anyway... the other day he brought up he feels like we don't talk enough. And I said I understand it's hard but this is the boundary I'm setting because I don't enjoy being on the phone, but we're talking 3/4 days a week for several hours. We fight and he says that even when we do talk I'm not talking enough right now. We fight and I reluctantly told him I just don't feel comfortable opening up right now. We fight and fight and it's turning me into a person I dont know or how to control.
In the beginning of our relationship I was quiet and just agreed to everything he said to avoid the argument. This didnt always work but it tends to. Now I get so overwhelmed and angry after several hours I mute my phone and scream into my pillow. This last call I started hitting myself, which I've never done before, and the next day my cheeks were bumpy and itchy, my forehead was swollen, my scalp hurt to touch, and I'm still getting over my two black eyes. He did NOT cause me to hit myself and he doesn't know. I feel silly for doing it. But I find myself at my breaking point and I don't know how to manage these fights anymore.
After hours and hours I break down and I just start agreeing to whatever he says I'm wrong about because I want it to end. I repeat the very thing I said eight hours ago- what I'm wrong about and how I'm going to fix it, but only now after crying on the phone all night long is sort of enough.
At the end of the call he asked if our friendship was over and I said I don't know. He asks this all the time and I basically beg him to be my friend but I don't want to anymore.
He sent me a long apology the morning after the fight and said he wouldn't do it anymore. I thanked him for not wanting those fights anymore. He sent me a pic of his dog and I said she was cute. That night I let our streak die. He messaged me this morning "you let our streak die" and I sat at my phone for ten minutes thinking of how to respond and eventually I just decided not to. He called me twice tonight at around 8pm and texted that he wanted us to talk for a bit, but i had made plans with another friend of mine a week ago to play animal crossing, so I did that and didn't respond to him. At 3am I saw he was typing on snapchat and I'm anxious because I've been receiving snaps and know my score went up, even though I have sent zero snaps to keep the number as low as I can
I know he wants to be friends still
But I sort of don't want to be friends anymore???? I really love the positive things in our relationship. In a lot of ways he was the best boyfriend and best friend I've ever had. But I can't do this anymore. I hate the person I am in these fights. I know he does not control my actions, it is not his fault I scream in my pillow or gave myself black eyes. But I have never in my life had any sort of romantic or friendly relationship like this. And I don't enjoy it. I really really love not fighting with my loved ones. And I really feel like no matter what I do to make him feel heard when he brings up an issue it's not enough. Every fight we have damages our friendship, which I've told him several times. I used to get over them easily but I am just so drained I always feel wary for the next blow up.
But I don't want him to feel like I'm abandoning our friendship? I don't know how to end a friendship? I've never had one end that wasn't a result of just growing apart. I don't know what to do. Sometimes I wish I never opened my door when he came over. I'm supposed to go to my home state shortly and I'm very anxious about being in the same state as him

Day 1: PostOp I was feeling pretty good and even pulled out the laptop and did a bit of work but this was due to PostOp drugs and the happy button. I was able to sleep on my back with the use of the button normally I am a side sleeper.
Day 2: Pain from all directions. Didn’t pull out the laptop. Only wanted to watch TV and rest. I was advised to eat a liquid diet and did so but was getting full fast and rarely finished a tray. Sleep was terrible and only managed four hours intermittently. Gas started coming via the bowels showing some life.
Day 3: Just pain and more pain but using the happy button started moving a bit more and moved to full liquids with Ensure drinks but still wouldn’t finish a tray and would feed nausea after eating the little bit I was eating. Nurse came to provide acetaminophen which caused me to vomit. No bowel movements today only gas. Again fours hours of intermittent sleep and happy button was taken away but I could call oxycodone as needed.
Day 4: Bowel movements started more regularly black, brown, brackish and watery. Moved to GI soft. Sleep still terrible mostly due to the bodies reaction to the pain could control a bit to sleep with oxycodone. No signs of infection though bloodwork shows the body is working on repairs and taking everything it can from the blood. Still can’t eat much but forced myself to eat a chicken breast and a bit of roast beef for the protein. Felt nauseous but didn’t vomit.
Day 5: Sleep was just a little better, nausea subsided, still a lot of pain but controlled, bowel movements coming hot and fast but no accidents. Doctor agreed to discharge to home with home health support.
Day 6: So much pain and scared to take too much of the painkillers. Despite this slept 6 hours instead of four in my own room with a better bed and my loving wife so happy to see I was okay. Used the bathroom constantly and focused on hydration. Ate more and didn’t feel nausea. Drank some Ensures I brought back from hospital.
Day 7: 8 hours of sleep with Oxycodone support. Bowels moving and appetite returning. Pain still there but not nearly as bad. I will take next week off and rest a bit and maybe do some light work at home. I expect to be able to fully work from home the week after and hybrid the next.

A few days ago we fought from 1:30a till about 8am. We have lengthy arguments like this all the time. We used to date, and it played a key role in the end of our relationship along with us having different values in general. I made it clear before we started dating I can't handle much fighting, particularly yelling, because of aspects of my childhood.
Two fights happened on my two birthdays- or before other important things like it's the night before a road trip or I'm ON the road trip. They happen when I want to go to bed or I'm about to run an errand. He monologs for literal hours at a time, and I can't speak up when he speaks incorrectly on my part because then I'm interrupting him and that causes more issues than me being misunderstood or remembered incorrectly.
In our relationship they were often caused by me not wanting him to pay my for my phone/phone bill before we'd been dating for even 3 months, though they were also caused by me being late to coming over and stuff like that as well. Sometimes I'd accidentally fall asleep after work instead of coming over, if I lay down after a shower, which I did a few times as I worked very early in the morning, and it made him feel like I didn't value his time.
I didn't talk to him for a few months after we broke up, even though he tried to contact me to apologize several times by texting/phonecalls/visiting several times at my apartment. Eventually someone knocked on my door and I opened it before I realized it was him. I didn't want to turn him away so we talked and he very sincerely apologized and talked about how he'd been going to therapy. I could recognize a great deal of change in him and we caught up on eachothers lives.
I moved to a different state like a week after we got in contact and i am struggling with this long distance friendship. He wants to talk all the time and I.. don't. I enjoy texting but sometimes I want to watch a show or play a game uninterrupted, but if I don't respond enough he feels ignored. He also likes to talk on the phone all the time and I really really don't enjoy talking on the phone at all, especially for hours at a time. We talked every night for a couple weeks in the beginning. But after a bad fight i reminded him I don't like being on the phone and said I wanted some space, which had been on my mind prior to the argument. The next week we talk on the phone for like 3 nights for a few hours, and maybe a few other little calls here and there, but he says it's not enough
But the thing is.. even when we talked for hours every night and texted pretty often it still wasn't enough. The only time it was enough was a short window when I checked my phone pretty obsessively to make sure I didn't miss a message from him and always stopped what I was doing to take his call
If my snap score goes up when we're not talking he asks me about it. I don't know why but I feel uncomfortable explaining to him the other people I talk to in the day. And often I'm not even talking to them when I'm not talking to him- they send me snaps when I'm not on my phone. I don't respond to anyone unless I make sure I respond to him first to avoid this exact issue. I feel anxious when my friends snap me because I know my score will go up and he's going to ask me about it
For the most part, our fights presently revolve around him feeling like I don't care enough about our friendship or he's feeling ignored by me. But I really really don't know what to do anymore. I was talking on the phone for hours at a time, I was texting all the time and keeping my responses as long as possible.. I was planning movie days, etc. It was never enough.
He's upset my responses are getting shorter. And to be honest they have. Often times I talk about my life, especially someone else in my life, it triggers a fight. Not always in the moment but it always comes back to bite me in the butt later. Particularly if I'm hanging out with my roommate, because in my friends eyes he and I get to hang out with all time. Which we kind of don't- my time is far more devoted to my friend than my roomate. But even if it wasn't- I like hanging out with my roomate because we can quietly sit in the same room together, and we don't have any conflict. He is a very kind presence and I'm grateful to have him as a friend.
It's hard talking about your life while also revealing the bare minimum about your life, and so I'm responding kind of shortly about my things and just try to focus on him.
The fight we had a few days ago was about us not talking enough. Sort of. The reasons our fights go on for hours is because I don't know how to respond to him when he brings up an issue. I sincerely try my best and I try it all. When he brings something up I explain to him I understand his concerns, both using his exact words and in my own words I explain why he's upset. If I agree with him I will apologize and tell him how I'm going to fix it and I fix it, after we fight for a few hours ofc, because he doesn't believe I can understand/apologize and fix something so early into a conversation.
Other times he keeps pushing me to explain myself, but if I explain my pov, things really really blow up because I don't always agree with him. And I think he confuses me not agreeing with him to not understanding. One of our fights came because he was upset when I got home with my roommate at 1am, when I had a 3 hour drive at 8am the next morning. Which blows my mind, because he fought with me literally all night before I drove across the state. I didn't tell him that though, I said I didn't mind getting home till 1 because I had fun when I was out and will still get plenty of sleep. But we still fought.
Anyway... the other day he brought up he feels like we don't talk enough. And I said I understand it's hard but this is the boundary I'm setting because I don't enjoy being on the phone. We fight and he says that even when we do talk I'm not talking enough right now. We fight and I reluctantly told him I just don't feel comfortable opening up right now. We fight and fight and it's turning me into a person I dont know or how to control.
In the beginning of our relationship I was quiet and just agreed to everything he said to avoid the argument. This didnt always work but it tends to. Now I get so overwhelmed and angry after several hours I mute my phone and scream into my pillow. This last call I started hitting myself, which I've never done before, and the next day my cheeks were bumpy and itchy, my forehead was swollen, my scalp hurt to touch, and I'm still getting over my two black eyes. He did NOT cause me to hit myself and he doesn't know. I feel silly for doing it. But I find myself at my breaking point and I don't know how to manage these fights anymore.
After hours and hours I break down and I just start agreeing to whatever he says I'm wrong about because I want it to end. I repeat the very thing I said eight hours ago- what I'm wrong about and how I'm going to fix it, but only now after crying on the phone all night long is it kind of enough.
He sent me a long apology the morning after the fight and said he wouldn't do it anymore. I thanked him for not wanting those fights anymore. He sent me a pic of his dog and I said she was cute. That night I let our streak die. He messaged me this morning "you let our streak die" and I sat at my phone for ten minutes thinking of how to respond and eventually I just decided not to. He called me twice tonight at around 8pm and texted that he wanted us to talk for a bit, but i had made plans with another friend of mine a week ago to play animal crossing, so I did that and didn't respond to him. At 3am I saw he was typing on snapchat and I'm anxious because I've been receiving snaps and know my score went up, even though I have sent zero snaps to keep the number as low as I can
I know he wants to be friends still
But I sort of don't want to be friends anymore???? I really love the positive things in our relationship. In a lot of ways he was the best boyfriend and best friend I've ever had. But I can't do this anymore. I hate the person I am in these fights. I know he does not control my actions, it is not his fault I scream in my pillow or gave myself black eyes. But I have never in my life had any sort of romantic or friendly relationship like this. And I don't enjoy it. I really really love not fighting with my loved ones. And I really feel like no matter what I do to make him feel heard when he brings up an issue it's not enough. Every fight we have damages our friendship, which I've told him several times. I used to get over them easily but I am just so drained I always feel wary for the next blow up.
But I don't want him to feel like I'm abandoning our friendship? I don't know how to end a friendship? I've never had one end that wasn't a result of just growing apart. I don't know what to do. Sometimes I wish I never opened my door when he came over. I'm supposed to go to my home state shortly and I'm very anxious about being in the same state as him

A few days ago we fought from 1:30a till about 8am. We have lengthy arguments like this all the time. We used to date, and it played a key role in the end of our relationship along with us having different values in general. I made it clear before we started dating I can't handle much fighting, particularly yelling, because of aspects of my childhood.
Two fights happened on my two birthdays- or before other important things like it's the night before a road trip or I'm ON the road trip. They happen when I want to go to bed or I'm about to run an errand. He monologs for literal hours at a time, and I can't speak up when he speaks incorrectly on my part because then I'm interrupting him and that causes more issues than me being misunderstood or remembered incorrectly.
In our relationship they were often caused by me not wanting him to pay my for my phone/phone bill before we'd been dating for even 3 months, though they were also caused by me being late to coming over and stuff like that as well. Sometimes I'd accidentally fall asleep after work instead of coming over, if I lay down after a shower, which I did a few times as I worked very early in the morning, and it made him feel like I didn't value his time.
I didn't talk to him for a few months after we broke up, even though he tried to contact me to apologize several times by texting/phonecalls/visiting several times at my apartment. Eventually someone knocked on my door and I opened it before I realized it was him. I didn't want to turn him away so we talked and he very sincerely apologized and talked about how he'd been going to therapy. I could recognize a great deal of change in him and we caught up on eachothers lives.
I moved to a different state like a week after we got in contact and i am struggling with this long distance friendship. He wants to talk all the time and I.. don't. I enjoy texting but sometimes I want to watch a show or play a game uninterrupted, but if I don't respond enough he feels ignored. He also likes to talk on the phone all the time and I really really don't enjoy talking on the phone at all, especially for hours at a time. We talked every night for a couple weeks in the beginning. But after a bad fight i reminded him I don't like being on the phone and said I wanted some space, which had been on my mind prior to the argument. The next week we talk on the phone for like 3 nights for a few hours, and maybe a few other little calls here and there, but he says it's not enough
But the thing is.. even when we talked for hours every night and texted pretty often it still wasn't enough. The only time it was enough was a short window when I checked my phone pretty obsessively to make sure I didn't miss a message from him and always stopped what I was doing to take his call
If my snap score goes up when we're not talking he asks me about it. I don't know why but I feel uncomfortable explaining to him the other people I talk to in the day. And often I'm not even talking to them when I'm not talking to him- they send me snaps when I'm not on my phone. I don't respond to anyone unless I make sure I respond to him first to avoid this exact issue. I feel anxious when my friends snap me because I know my score will go up and he's going to ask me about it
For the most part, our fights presently revolve around him feeling like I don't care enough about our friendship or he's feeling ignored by me. But I really really don't know what to do anymore. I was talking on the phone for hours at a time, I was texting all the time and keeping my responses as long as possible.. I was planning movie days, etc. It was never enough.
He's upset my responses are getting shorter. And to be honest they have. Often times I talk about my life, especially someone else in my life, it triggers a fight. Not always in the moment but it always comes back to bite me in the butt later. Particularly if I'm hanging out with my roommate, because in my friends eyes he and I get to hang out with all time. Which we kind of don't- my time is far more devoted to my friend than my roomate. But even if it wasn't- I like hanging out with my roomate because we can quietly sit in the same room together, and we don't have any conflict. He is a very kind presence and I'm grateful to have him as a friend.
It's hard talking about your life while also revealing the bare minimum about your life, and so I'm responding kind of shortly about my things and just try to focus on him.
The fight we had a few days ago was about us not talking enough. Sort of. The reasons our fights go on for hours is because I don't know how to respond to him when he brings up an issue. I sincerely try my best and I try it all. When he brings something up I explain to him I understand his concerns, both using his exact words and in my own words I explain why he's upset. If I agree with him I will apologize and tell him how I'm going to fix it and I fix it, after we fight for a few hours ofc, because he doesn't believe I can understand/apologize and fix something so early into a conversation.
Other times he keeps pushing me to explain myself, but if I explain my pov, things really really blow up because I don't always agree with him. And I think he confuses me not agreeing with him to not understanding. One of our fights came because he was upset when I got home with my roommate at 1am, when I had a 3 hour drive at 8am the next morning. Which blows my mind, because he fought with me literally all night before I drove across the state. I didn't tell him that though, I said I didn't mind getting home till 1 because I had fun when I was out and will still get plenty of sleep. But we still fought.
Anyway... the other day he brought up he feels like we don't talk enough. And I said I understand it's hard but this is the boundary I'm setting because I don't enjoy being on the phone. We fight and he says that even when we do talk I'm not talking enough right now. We fight and I reluctantly told him I just don't feel comfortable opening up right now. We fight and fight and it's turning me into a person I dont know or how to control.
In the beginning of our relationship I was quiet and just agreed to everything he said to avoid the argument. This didnt always work but it tends to. Now I get so overwhelmed and angry after several hours I mute my phone and scream into my pillow. This last call I started hitting myself, which I've never done before, and the next day my cheeks were bumpy and itchy, my forehead was swollen, my scalp hurt to touch, and I'm still getting over my two black eyes. He did NOT cause me to hit myself and he doesn't know. I feel silly for doing it. But I find myself at my breaking point and I don't know how to manage these fights anymore.
After hours and hours I break down and I just start agreeing to whatever he says I'm wrong about because I want it to end. I repeat the very thing I said eight hours ago- what I'm wrong about and how I'm going to fix it, but only now after crying on the phone all night long is it kind of enough.
He sent me a long apology the morning after the fight and said he wouldn't do it anymore. I thanked him for not wanting those fights anymore. He sent me a pic of his dog and I said she was cute. That night I let our streak die. He messaged me this morning "you let our streak die" and I sat at my phone for ten minutes thinking of how to respond and eventually I just decided not to. He called me twice tonight at around 8pm and texted that he wanted us to talk for a bit, but i had made plans with another friend of mine a week ago to play animal crossing, so I did that and didn't respond to him. At 3am I saw he was typing on snapchat and I'm anxious because I've been receiving snaps and know my score went up, even though I have sent zero snaps to keep the number as low as I can
I know he wants to be friends still
But I sort of don't want to be friends anymore???? I really love the positive things in our relationship. In a lot of ways he was the best boyfriend and best friend I've ever had. But I can't do this anymore. I hate the person I am in these fights. I know he does not control my actions, it is not his fault I scream in my pillow or gave myself black eyes. But I have never in my life had any sort of romantic or friendly relationship like this. And I don't enjoy it. I really really love not fighting with my loved ones. And I really feel like no matter what I do to make him feel heard when he brings up an issue it's not enough. Every fight we have damages our friendship, which I've told him several times. I used to get over them easily but I am just so drained I always feel wary for the next blow up.
But I don't want him to feel like I'm abandoning our friendship? I don't know how to end a friendship? I've never had one end that wasn't a result of just growing apart. I don't know what to do. Sometimes I wish I never opened my door when he came over. I'm supposed to go to my home state shortly and I'm very anxious about being in the same state as him

Michael Gamble, Franchise Director, and Executive Producer:
Software Engineer Electronic Arts May 2004 - December 2005
Project Management Teaching Assistant University of Calgary January 2007 - August 2008
Black Rain Software January 2006 - July 2009: Led Development teams to develop mods for Neverwinter Nights 1-2, Warcraft 3 and other games, principal designer for all their projects.
Project Managers Mass Effect 2 and Firewalker, Producers on the Weapons and Armor DLC, Co-Project Manager on Kasumi - Stolen Memory, Project Managers on Overlord, Associate Producer Lair of the Shadow Broker
Producers Mass Effect 3, also on From Ashes, Leviathan, Omega and Citadel. DLC Producer on the Resurgence, Rebellion, Earth, Retaliation, and Reckoning multiplayer expansions. He also directed several of the DLCs
Producers Mass Effect: Andromeda
Lead Producers Anthem
Involved with the pitching and greenlighting process of the Legendary Edition
Parrish Ley, Franchise Creative Director
Cinematics Animators Mass Effect and Cinematic Director on Bring Down the Sky: Animated the opening of Mass Effect 1
Additional Animation Dragon Age: Origins
Lead Cinematics Animator Mass Effect 2, Cinematics Animators on Zaeed - The Price of Revenge, Kasumi - Stolen Memory, Overlord, Lair of the Shadow Broker and Arrival
Co-Lead Cinematics Animator Mass Effect 3, Cinematics Animators on From Ashes, Leviathan and Citadel: Animated the scene at the end of the Citadel DLC
Animation Director Anthem
Development Lead Improbable Studio March 2019 - January 2020: Worked on a new Ip
Additional Art Supervisors Mass Effect: Legendary Edition
Preston Watamaniuk, Game Director:
Other QA Baldur's Gate II: Shadows of Amn
System Designers, Core Design Team, Manual Writers and Additional Programming Neverwinter Nights
Senior Technical Designer, Assistant Lead Designer and Core Design Team Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic
Additional Design Jade Empire
Lead Designer Mass Effect: Helped develop the game's lore and story, and came up with the synthetics vs. organic theme.
Lead Designer Mass Effect 2, also Additional Design on Zaeed - The Price of Revenge, Kasumi - Stolen Memory, Overlord and Lair of the Shadow Broker
Assistant Director of Design Dragon Age II
Lead Designer Mass Effect 3
Co-Lead Designer (Early Development) Mass Effect: Andromeda
Design Director Anthem
Derek Watts, Art Director:
Artists MDK 2
2D Artists Neverwinter Nights
Art Director, Concept Artists and Core Design Team Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic
Additional Art Jade Empire
Art Director Mass Effect and the Bring Down the Sky DLC
Art Director Mass Effect 2, also Concept artist on the Firewalker Pack
Art Director Mass Effect 3
Additional Art Mass Effect: Andromeda
Art Director Anthem
Additional Art Supervisors Mass Effect: Legendary Edition
Piperworks Studio on Call of Duty: Vanguard
Artists The Walking Dead: Last Mile
Piperworks Studio on Call of Duty: Modern Warfare III
Books: Co-Writer The Art of the Mass Effect Universe with Casey Hudson. He also contributed to the development of the Mass Effect: Andromeda: Annihilation novel.
Nathan Zufelt, Animation Director:
Character Animators - Brave - TV series pitch
3D Effects Animators - Chaotic - TV Series: Credited on at least one episode
Character Animators - Zeke's Pad - TV Series - Pilot
Character Animators - Viva Pinata - TV Series: Credited on at least six episodes
Marketing and Web Development CG Toolkit 2004 - 2008
Cinematic Animators Dragon Age: Origins, Senior Cinematic Animator on Awakening, also Cinematic Animators on Leliana's Song
Senior Cinematic Animator Dragon Age II
Senior Cinematic Animator Mass Effect 3, also Cinematic Animators on From Ashes
Co-Lead Cinematic Animator Dragon Age: Inquisition also the Lead Cinematic Animator on Jaws of Hakkon and Trespasser
Additional Design Mass Effect: Andromeda
Assistant Animation Director Anthem
Animation Specialist Inflexion Games June 2019 - June 2020
May have contributed to the development of the 2020 teaser trailer
Also the Animation Director on Dreadwolf
Eric Vervaet, Director of Audio:
Sound Effects Editor Grover's Mill (Short Film)
Dialogue Editors Baltimore (Short Film)
Audio Team NBA Street Homecourt
Audio Assistants Need for Speed: ProStreet
Audio Artists NBA Live 09
Sound Artists Fifa Soccer 09
Supervising Sound Editor Fifa 10 Wii
Audio Team EA Sports Active: NFL Training Camp
Sound Effects Editors Fifa 11
Audio Artists SSX
Lead Audio Designer The Amazing Spider-Man (Videogame)
Audio Artists Fifa 14
Audio Artists 2014 Fifa World Cup Brazil (Videogame)
Senior Sound Designer Quicklime Studio on a then unannounced game
Audio Artists Dragon Age: Inquisition, also the Lead Audio Designer of Jaws of Hakkon and Trespasser
Senior Audio Designer Mass Effect: Andromeda
Senior Audio Designer Anthem
Director of Audio Mass Effect: Legendary Edition
Additional Audio Star Wars: The Old Republic Legacy of the Sith
Also Director of Audio on Dreadwolf
Mary C. DeMarle, Senior Narrative Director:
Production Assistant Phantasm II (Film)
Effects Assistant Lucky Stiff (Film
Worked for Hanna-Barbera (Cartoon studio) for several years starting off as a production assistant
Freelance Writing work for several years
Writer Myst III: Exile
Writers Homerworld 2
Writer - Designer Myst IV: Revelation
Writers Dungeon Siege II: Broken World
Additional Script Writing Tom Clancy's Splinter Cell: Conviction
Lead WriteNarrative Designer and Casting Crew Deus Ex: Human Revolution, Also Story Director and Casting Crew on The Missing Link DLC: Wrote much of the main plot for the base game, and co-wrote the scenario for The Missing Link DLC
Narrative/Writing Director Deus Ex: The Fall
Executive Narrative Director Deus Ex: Go
Executive Narrative Director Deus Ex: Mankind Divided, also on the Desperate Measures, System Rift and A Criminal Past DLC's also the Executive Narrative Director on Deus Ex: Breach: Worked primarily on the main plot for the base game.
Senior Narrative Director Marvel Guardians of the Galaxy
Books: Oversaw the development of several of the Deus Ex novels
Dusty Everman, Principal Narrative Designer:
Member of Technical Staff Amdahl 1992 - 1994
Senior Software Engineer Vivace Networks 2001 - 2003
Developed Mods for Neverwinter Nights
Cinematics Designers Jade Empire
Lead Technical Designer, also Lead Designer on Bring Down the Sky and Pinnacle Station: Scripting on the Citadel and the Normandy
Lead Level Designer and Uncredited Writer Mass Effect 2, Additional Design on Zaeed - The Price of Revenge, Firewalker Pack and Kasumi - Stolen Memory, Level Designers and Additional Design Overlord, Additional Design Lair of the Shadow Broker and Arrival: Designed Much of the Normandy SR2, Wrote Chawkas, Ken, Gabby and Kelly also, all the other non-companion NPCs on the Normandy, with some input from Lukas Kristjanson
Senior Level and Uncredited Writer Mass Effect 3, Level Designers on Leviathan, Additional Design Omega and Level Designers on Citadel: Designed Much of the Normandy SR2, Wrote Chakwas, Ken, Gabby, Kelly, and Steve Cortez. Also wrote the story for the scene at the end of the Citadel DLC and the script for Cortez's version.
Level Designers Dragon Age: Inquisition
Level Designers Mass Effect: Andromeda and Anthem left prior to the release of both games
Founder and Sole Member Dirty Sky Games, LLC June 2015 - October 2020: VR Game Developer
Rejoined Bioware in October 2020
Michael Tucker, Narrative Designer:
Filmmaking:
worked on Donkeys On: A Bus (Short Film)
Director, Writer and Editor (dik) (Short Film)
Director What It Can Be (dik) (Short Film)
Director, Writers, Cinematographer and Editor, Kaylie & Tristan - Film Noir (Short Film)
Editors SoundWorks Collection 2009 - 2011
Co-Founder Finite Fillms (Production Company
Cinematographer and First Assistant Director Another Way (Short Film)
Director McGuffin An Experimental Short Film About A Missing Turtle (Short Film)
worked on "Talk Show Host" on the Beach of Santa Cruz (Short Film)
worked on Facebook Friend Request (Short Film):
Director, Writer and Editor The Reunion of Amilia Marbleberry and Marcy Stills (Short Film)
Cinematographer, Associate Producer and Co-Editor Day 1000 (Short Film)
Director and Producers You Are Here (Short Film)
Producers The Kristy Corollary (Short Film)
Director, Writer and Producer Mistletoe (Short Film)
Cinematographer and Executive Producers Douche (Short Film)
Cinematographer, Writer story, Co-Scriptwriter, Producers Digital Effects, Special Effects and Sound Editors Stealing Time (Short Film)
Director, Co-Writer, Producers, Digital Effects and Co-Editor Defenseless (Short Film)
Producers, Editors and Sound Editors Forest Falls (Short Film)
Camera Operator The Sound of Transformers: Dark of the Moon (Documentary Short Film)
Producers and Additional Photography Occupational Hazards (Short Film)
Director, Writer, Producers, Additional Photography and Co-Editor Imperfect (Short Film)
Co-Director, Co-Writer, Producers, Additional Photography, Digital Effects, Special Effects, and Co-Editor Anamnesis (Short Film)
Director Workday (Short Film)
Producers Lovebound: Love Abounds (Short Film)
Director, Writer and Producers Status: Single (Short Film)
Sound Recordist Friend Zone: The Series on one episode (Web Series)
Director, Writers story, Scriptwriter, Editor, Sound Editing/Mixing, Visual Effects and an Actor playing himself in The Wedding Gift of Amuno Kensai (Surprise Video for Alex's Wedding!):
Co-Director, Co-Writer, Producers and Co-Editor Anamnesis (Webs Series)
Editors and Director of Motion Graphics Being George Clooney (Documentary)
Additional Graphics 30 for 30 on one episode (Documentary TV Series)
Co-Director, Producers, Editors, Digital Effects and Camera Operators At All Costs: Making an Esports Team (Documentary TV Movie)
Co-Producers and Camera Operators At All Costs: Making an Esports Team (Documentary/Reality TV Series): Editors on the original version of of the episodes
Co-Producers At All Costs (Documentary TV Movie)
Director Poltergeist by BANKS Spec Music Video (Unofficial)
Director Don't Start Now by Dua Lipa Spec Music Video (Unofficial)
Director BANKS — This is What it Feels Like (Unofficial) Music Video
Video Editors Magnit February 2022 - August 2023 prior to joining Bioware Youtube:
Finite Films Youtube Channel (No Longer Uploads)
His own personal Youtube Channel: Has posted 2 episodes of a podcast there in addition to videos of his films
Co-Creator Lessons from the Screenplay: Film, Television and Videogame storytelling analysis channel: Writing, Editing, Producing and Managing team and Host
Co-Creator Story Mode Videogame storytelling analysis channel: Writing, Editing, Producing and Managing team and Host/Hosts
Co-Creator Beyond the Screenplay: Film and Television podcast analysis channel: Editing, Producing and Managing team and Hosts
Hilary Heskett Hidey, Narrative Producer:
Co-Founder & CMO, Crabcat Industries (August 2010 - September 2012): A media production, event planning, and community development company. They partnered with developers and publishers on engagement and awareness strategies. The company served as an event consultant for BioWare/EA at San Diego Comic-Con 2011.
Community Consultant/Planner Bioware 2011 - 2013
North American Marketing Director and later Director, Global Marketing & Public Relations for Cint until October 2013
Global Product Marketing Manager at BioWare for Dragon Age: Inquisition, Inquisition Post Launch Content, and Andromeda until leaving in March 2016."
Sr. Brand Managers Bethesda Softworks April 2016 - May 2020, Sr. Brand Managers Starfield, Additional Contributions ZeniMax Media: Bethesda Softworks Marketing & Communications on Ghostwite Tokyo - Prelude: The Corrupted Case File, Ghostwire Tokyo and Hi-Fi Rush, also worked on The Elder Scrolls Online, The Elder Scrolls: Blades, The Elder Scrolls: Legends and The Evil Within 2.
Sr. Global Brand Manager Bioware/Electronic Arts Dragon Age and Mass Effect May 2020 - June 2021
Also Narrative Producer on Dreadwolf
Narrative Producer since June of 2021
Brenon Holmes, Producer:
Other QA and Additional Programming Baldur's Gate II: Shadows of Amn
Additional Programming MDK 2
Programmers Neverwinter Nights, also on the Shadows of Undrentide and Hordes of the Underdark Expansions: Ai scripting, Implementing DnD rules and Combat System
Additional Programming Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic: Worked on scripting systems, Worked on combat system
Additional Programming Jade Empire: Worked on the save game System
Senior Programmer Mass Effect and Programmers on Bring Down the Sky: Worked on Ai systems
Unreleased Project
Programmers Dragon Age: Origins: Worked on prototypes, the appearance systems, player locomotion systems, and core animation systems. Created combat system features
Senior Programmer Mass Effect 2, Additional Design Overlord: Developed various gameplay systems
Gameplay Designers/Senior Designer Mass Effect 3, Additional Design Leviathan, Gameplay Designers Omega, Additional Design Citadel: Responsible for creative design of enemies, Direction for creatures concepts, also their animation and behaviours.
Additional Design Dragon Age: Inquisition
Gameplay Designers Mass Effect: Andromeda: Consultation, technical audits and reviews of designs
Lead Technical Designer and later Technical Design Director on Anthem: Responsible for creative design of enemies, Direction for creatures concepts, Managed creature/enemy design team
Technical Design Director Mass Effect: Legendary Edition
Former:
Amanda Klesko, Associate Producer until September 2022:
Freelance Graphic Design Services April 2010 - April 2014
Marketing Coordinator Dragon Age: Inquisition, also on Jaws of Hakkon and Trespasser
Business Development Specialist Mass Effect: Andromeda
Business Development Specialist Anthem
Business Development Specialist (Consumer Products) Mass Effect and Dragon Age Franchises until May 2019
Associate Producer (Entertainment & Publishing) Mass Effect: Legendary Edition
Associate Producer (Entertainment & Publishing) Dragon Age Franchise until October 2021
Associate Producer Mass Effect 5 September 2021 until September 2022 left to go join Humanoid Origin as an Associate Producer
Currently still at Humanoid Origin promoted to Narrative Producer
. They do also have several other long time Mass Effect developers like Patrick and Karin Weekes, David Falkner, and Matthew Rhodes
And yes they do still have several of the series' creators at the company.
They will also undoubtedly hire new talent, which, despite what many would think, is not a bad thing!

Prologue

Hello and welcome to my post. I will subdivide this into two large parts. One will cover my thoughts, feelings, my hopes and dreams...While the other will tell you the specifics of how I pass the time, what topics interest me, what passions do I posses. I believe that at the end of this leap into my inner world, you dear reader, will have all the necessary information to judge whether we are compatible or not.

Part I
I am writing this in the hopes of finding something that I lack. Lately I have had this feeling, this tinge of melancholy within the dephts of my being, this yearning to find a kindred spirit, another Soul, much like mine, to form a bond with. Perhaps Loneliness is the right word for what is bothering me, but to use it seems to carry with it a connotation of ungratefulness. Ungratefulness for the people that I do have in my life, although none of them, of course, have the connection to me that I seek here.

I have found it increasingly necessary to seek in this Life a sort of purity of thought. What I mean is, I have began to undestand what ideas and concepts are ultimately compatible with my inner most Self, ergo what guidelines I have to follow to feel the most whole. Naturally I have likewise realised what I cannot add to my Self and what I will henceforth reject with all the power that I posses.

With this new context in mind, I now follow on the path of self improvement. I will now begin to mold my Self into my perfected idea of how the Self should be. This is certainly a significant undertaking, one that will not be easy to follow through on but one that I ultimately have to do. To me such context is essential. It is akin to a Guiding Star shining in the night. I will follow this Star for without it I am lost in the vast Darkness.

Looking back at my life, it was suboptimal, especially if one compares the way it molded me to how I will now mold myself. I suppose I must look on with a hint of regret at all that time which one might consider to be lost. Still... I try to stave off such decisively negative interpretations, after all, I have ultimately came to these conclusions. That means that somewhere along the line I had to have picked up on enough of such ideas for them to become so cemented in my consciousness. Well, either that or I was always like this, but in that case I can at least thank my life up to this point for not being able to supress such manifestations of my inner most Self.

To add to the topic of my life, I must admit that not all the battles have yet been won, not all the Demons vanquished, not every Mountain climbed. I want you to keep such things in mind when deciding whether or not to approach me. Many will shy away, I undestand that much, but the pursuit of true Companionship is just another such battle. Having said all that I do believe that being able to overcome hurdles together carries with it a certain appeal. That is to say, what's the fun in joining once the Game is already over?

I don't shy away from such challenges, perhaps to a fault. Certain troubles that I faced in the past carry with them a long shadow over my current health and well being. Still, I intend to change little in this regard other than the proficiency with which I will clash the current of my Will against the cliffs of Life.
Part II
In this part of my post I will tell you about my interests and hobbies, I will try to be thorough, commonality in this regard is rather important to build a relationship
History. I have had an interest in history for almost a decade now, it started back in school and developed from there. Well, now that I think about it one could argue that it started even earlier in my life as I liked watching the odd historic documentary or film aired on television but it wasn't regular back then, I never actively sought it out. I am mostly interested in European history in the period between the 18th-20th century but I sometimes branch out to other time periods and other parts of the world. I watch various channels related to history and read articles and sometimes books. I have recently got a few books on the German revolution of 1848/1849 and a historical magazine on the Thirty Years' War. Besides that I try to visit museums sometimes.
Literature. Especially old novels. I like to immerse myself in the Worlds of these books, I tend to read them while listening to thematically fitting music and take my time with them. One time you are following a troubled Youth in his quest for spiritual understanding of the world, another you see the aged and decrepit Doctor gambling his very Soul on the promises of abtaining satisfaction in earthy pleasures, then again your olfaction notices the most pleasant scent known to man even as the one eminating it has the appearance of a revolting Frog. These and many other stories open up to you once you decide to set foot into the literary World.
Languages. I know three, with one being a bit rusty. I am currently working intently on strengthening it. I believe that if I continue to apply myself in this regard then I should be able to finally conquer it. What language am I working on? Well, if you were to stack all the major works in it they would be as tall as a house... It is fun to go through different works in multiple languages, the same goes for film, games and such.
Games. I recently played Cyberpunk 2077. Well as recently as I played any major story centric game. Now that the dust has settled and the bugs mostly removed...It's not that bad. The main questline at least. Besides that I tried Fallout 76 (Very average, I'm dissapointed with what they made the "RPG" system) and I might give Deus Ex Manking Divided another spin (since it's somewhat similar to Cyberpunk when it comes to its aesthetics). Dark Souls is one of my favorite series, I still haven't beaten Elden Ring though. When it came out I wasn't in the right mindset to invest a hundred hours into it, with all those bosses and difficult locations. I think I'll only consider playing it if I am streaming it to someone. I am generally interested in either streaming games or having the person I am talking to stream them to me. To be specific I mean streaming to a single person while being on call. Besides that I'm a big fan of Paradox strategy games, especially Europa Universalis IV and Heats of Iron IV, I tend to only play single player since I find multiplayer with many people to be rather stressful but on the other hand I have nothing against a co-op game. I'm not the best player though, despite the ammount of hours I have in them. Another great game I would mention would be Dragon's Dogma. A very underrated RPG. I recently beat it again and it was an atmospheric and interesting experience. It is one of those games that feel like they have an endless ammount of depth and constant new secrets to discover.
Anime and Manga. In recent times my interest in them has waned but I still watch the occasional series here and there. Like Cyberpunk Edgerunners (Which I found to be rather mediocre) and the very good first season from the new arc of Bleach. Some of my favourite series include: Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood, Death Note, Fate;Zero, Psycho Pass, Code Geass and Attack on Titan. I wouldn't mind if you were to introduce me to some new series, maybe based on the ones I mentioned. My favourite Manga is Berserk which I still follow, althought I am still not certain on the direction that the new author is taking. I suppose it really is a matter of contention whether a somewhat (or considerably warped) vision is better than an unfinished work. One could argue that a few novels remain unfinished and possess a macabre appeal to them as such.
Music. Classical music has a very special place in my heart. A few of my favourite pieces would be: Clair de Lune, Nocturne Op. 9 No.2, Devil's Trill Sonata, Danse Macabre, Valse Sentimentale, Symphony No. 7 in A Major, Op. 92: II. Alegreto (by Beethoven) and Suite from Swan Lake, Op. 20a: I. Scene. Moderato. There are more but these ones always invoke something in me when I listen to them. Besides Classical I also enjoy listening to Synthwave, old Western pop and J-pop, both modern and from the 20th century.
Esotericism. I am interested in things spiritual, mystical, magical and esoteric. I have read religios texts, magical grimoires, introductions to various schools of thought. It is interesting to me.
Epilogue
Hopefully I was able to cast the spotlight upon my inner World in a clear and unequivocal manner. I feel the need to add to the aforementioned that I am rather introverted, which means that I tend to dislike large social gatherings. I managed to condition myself to be able to endure the presense of large groups of people but it isn't something that I would seek out in most cases. Besides that I am neurodivergent and suffer from certain issues with mental health. I have to take medication to keep myself under control. They work well enough but certain days are harder than others. I respect the struggle that others have with mental health but in the context of a relationship I have my limits, no one with BDP for instance. I am also not looking for anything casual. I understand than one cannot demand depth and meaning from a conversation with an absolute stranger, that is akin to trying to build a sand castle right before the waves strike but I ask at least that you enter with a mindset that this might become something of significance. I also do want to say that I am completely Monogamous. My preference? The sickly, pale, intellectual who watches rain droplets slide down the window in Autumn. Lastly, if I enjoy the company of a person I tend to not want to let them go.
Thank you for taking the time to read my post and have a good day. I ask that you send a DM instead of a chat and that you give the English translation of my title as your own.
Goodbye...Or perhaps untill we meet again

I am not the OOP. The OOP is u/Illustrious_Young430 posting in AITAH
Concluded as per OOP
1 update - Short
Original - 13th May 2024
Update - 17th May 2024
​
AITAH for wanting to leave my volunteer position because they gave the paid job to their best friends child
​
I’ve been volunteering in a charity shop since about August last year, I initially started to get myself back into a routine and work ready for being out of work for so long. I really enjoyed it and it’s given me so much confidence. Unfortunately the manager had to take sick leave because she needs an operation, the assistant manager handed in her keys and quit because no one from the other stores would come in and help or cover a day for her, so she was basically doing everything.
The shop had to close for awhile till they found someone else. When they did I came straight back because I had started to fall backwards in myself and needed the routine again. The new (floating manager) let’s call Mary, is 19 and had no idea how to run the shop, her mum is the companies customs manager for this area, she is also best friends with another lady who runs one of the other shops (she has two daughters) one is running another shop. This is not a family run business.
At first it was very unwelcoming and they changed how we worked, I gave it time because obviously she’s new to this and doesn’t really talk to anyone, eventually over time we became friendly, work well together and have a laugh. A new assistant manager had been hired who is absolutely amazing and we get on very well, he has recently gone to another one of the stores to run it as manager.
His job became available so I asked about applying, Mary got really excited and wanted me to apply, she helped me with interview questions, gave me the opportunity to run the shop for a few days completely on my own, which went very well. At first she wasn’t doing the interviews, it was her mum and someone else.
When it came closer I got informed that her and her mum was interviewing me, I got excited because I thought I was a shoo in as Mary had expressed if she could pick then it would be me. A day before, I found out that the ladies other daughter was applying too, I knew from then on it didn’t matter what I said or did I wouldn’t be getting it because they are all very close.
Mary’s mum rang me to say I didn’t get it the other girl did, making out it was some random women, even though I know it’s the daughter, but that I did very well and they wanted to make me lead volunteer, I have been there for months, run it on my own, cashed up, opened up, everything, I know how to run it better than mary does.
I want to leave because I feel like I’ve been screwed over, I’m going to complain to the higher up because i feel it’s unfair to basically say I have the job, but then give it to your best friends daughter.
​
Comments
​
Rare-Selection2348
Don't bother complaining. Don't bother going in again. NTA
​
Old_Web8071
Complaining probably won't do any good. Best bet is to walk away & find a job that pays. Or some other charity until you do.
And don't give a notice. At the end of a day, just say, "I'm not coming back to work here" & leave. Preferably when you know they will be short-handed because other people are already taking off.
It's up to you if you want to give them a notice or reason you're leaving. Me? I'd just say I'm not coming back.
​
Foolish-Pleasure99
Yes, don't complain, leave. Any notice up to you. They will quickly learn nepotism is not a management strategy, will suffer, and will cover that all up or chalk it up to "learning on the job".
I do not see anyone reaching out to admit they made a mistake and if you stay you're just a doormat and will have to run the place without pay or recognition.
​
**Judgement - NTA*\*
​
Update - 4 days later
​
Thank you for all your messages I didn’t expect anyone to reply. I left, I went in and it was really awkward, so when I finished for the day I told Mary this is my last day, she was shocked and didn’t really know what to say. I walked out knowing that most of the other volunteers will probably leave soon too.
Either for paying jobs or because they are getting annoyed with how it’s run. I’m also going to tell the higher ups about it because I don’t want them to get away with it, it’s not the first time and someone in the comments pointed out that corporate might not know what is going on and it’s not fair to anyone.
​
Comments
​
kobresia9
Mary must be really dense if she's shocked
​
ankle-biter-42
You’d be surprised at how stupid people like this can be. Either that or she thinks she’s manipulating OP
​
Stephenallen1977
Honesty this was the best course of action for you.
If you are in the UK it does not sound like there was a fair recruitment process given that there was favouritism to someone who did not have experience.
​
UtahCyan
Nepo hires. Happens everywhere. They usually end up in disaster, but you have to wait for the disaster for anything you change.
​
I am not the OOP. Please do not harass the OOP.
Please remember the No Brigading Rule and to be civil in the comments

Below you will find a weekly reminder of our Rules and partial FAQ. It's definitely a long read, but it's worth your time, especially if you are new to the community, or dropping by as a result of a link you found elsewhere. We periodically revise our rules, this weekly notice will help keep you informed of any changes made.
NOTE: These rules are guidelines. Some moderation discretion is to be expected.

Community Rules

1. Kindness Matters

Advise, don't criticize.

• Post with empathy, thoughtfulness, and constructive commentary rather than judgment. Don't be an asshole.
• Name-calling, slurs (including gender or race based slurs), and insults towards other community members will not be tolerated. Do not attack others for their personally held values, custody situation, marital status, physical distance from stepkids, or economic status; or on the basis of race, sex, sexual orientation, age, religion, or ethnicity.
• No name-calling toward children, including the above-mentioned insults or the term "skids", or terms such as "mini-wife" or "mini-husband."
• Comments advocating spanking or any mention of wanting to harm children are not allowed.
• This is a support sub, not a judgement sub, assholes are not tolerated. Comments with terms used in other subs to pass judgement on assholes will be removed.

2. No Drama

This is a support sub.

• Bickering, nitpicking, and thread derailment will not be tolerated and will be subject to removal at moderator discretion.
• Do not repeatedly badger a poster demanding answers, or refuse to acknowledge an answer that's already been given.
• Do not use sensitive issues from past posts (either from this sub or other subs) to attack another user, as we are all discussing vulnerable topics.
• Crossposting anything from /stepparents to any other subreddit might result in a ban and may result in the original thread being locked. Brigading our sub will result in an immediate ban.

3. Report, Don’t Rant

No backseat modding.

• If you see someone breaking the rules, report the post or comment to the mods rather than engaging them in an argument. Failure to do so may be subject to comment removal at moderator discretion.
• No meta posts complaining about rude comments, DMs, or general sub issues.
• If you think someone is a troll or previously banned user, either use the report function or message the mods to direct their attention to the issue.

4. No Naming & Shaming

No userpings or links.

• Tagging/pinging users or other subreddits in an attempt to bully, harass, or complain will not be tolerated. Do not tag other subs, ever.
• If you want to complain about another subreddit being hostile to stepparents, do not name the subreddit. "Other parenting/advice/judgement subs" will suffice.

5. No Platitudes

Nobody knew what they were getting into.

• Comments like "You knew what you were getting into", "Love them, love their kids!", "They're a package deal!" and "You have to love them like your own!" will be removed.
• Comments suggesting that OP is not cut out for stepparenting will be removed at moderator discretion.
• Comments like "This is just a part of parenting, deal with it!" will be removed at moderator discretion.

6. No Trolling

We have zero tolerance for trolls.

• This is a support sub. Our subscribers do not have the time, nor inclination, to provide support to internet trolls. Posts that are suspected to be trolling attempts will be immediately removed, and the poster banned.
• Concern trolling, devil's advocating, gish-galloping, sealioning, and general asshattery are subject to immediate removal and banning without warning or notice.
• Any attempt to circumvent the ban by creating a new username will be reported to reddit admins and possibly result in account suspension.

7. No Personally Identifiable Information

Use discretion when posting.

• We highly recommend using a separate account for support subs to help prevent being doxxed. Do not post any information that may allow others to figure out your identity.
• Do not post photos of children, or any other photo that could be used to identify you or another user on the sub.
• Any image that contains a name or other identifying information should have the name or identifying information blurred out. This includes drawings, notes, and screenshots.
• Do not link to social media or any articles/blogs where you or another user on the sub is mentioned by name.

8. No More than 2 Posts per 24 hours

Use the daily threads.

• We are not a huge sub, but we are no longer a small sub. If you have multiple grievances to air, use the daily discussion threads instead of multiple posts.

9. Follow Reddiquette

Remember the human.

• Adhere to the same standards of behavior online that you follow in real life.
• Read it in full here.
• Downvoting is reserved for comments that don’t contribute, and shouldn't be used to indicate disagreement.
• If you believe someone is in violation of the subreddit rules, please either use the report function or message the mods to direct their attention to the issue.
• Suspected brigading will be reported to reddit admins.

10. No Porn, Spam, Blogs, or Research Studies/Surveys Without Mod Approval

Just don't.

• This is a SFW subreddit. Posting pornography will result in immediate post removal and permanent ban.
• Advertising on the subreddit (outside of Reddit's own advertising) is not allowed.
• No personal blog posts are allowed without express moderator permission.
• No advertising without prior mod approval.
• No asking for money/posting fundraisers/etc.
• For links to parenting research studies or surveys, please message the mods for permission before posting.

11. Disputes in Modmail Only

Don't argue with the mods on the sub.

• Any issues specifically related to how a mod is moderating should be addressed to the full moderating team via mod mail. This ensures that all mods are aware of any concerns and prevents disintegration of the topic thread at hand.
• This means to do not message or send chat requests to individual mods. All discussion and complaints about mod actions need to be done in mod mail ONLY. Failure to follow this rule can result in an immediate permanent ban.
• Comments in threads asking about mod decisions are subject to removal without notice.

12. Moderator Actions

We aren't kidding.

• Users are expected to know the rules before posting. If you are warned or banned for violating the rules, ignorance is not an excuse.
• Moderators will remove posts and comments and/or lock threads in accordance with the rules above. Typically this happens when threads have gone off-topic in a way that is not productive for the OP, or comments overall have become contentious or disrespectful.
• If a poster continues to argue or to willfully violate these rules, temporary and permanent ban procedures will be followed. Any attempts to avoid or bypass temporary bans will result in a permanent ban. User bans will not be discussed in the sub. Questions posted about user bans are subject to removal and the poster subject to warning/ban procedures. The mod team will not discuss a specific user ban with anyone other than the user involved.
• New accounts are subject to manual approval until they are no longer deemed "new" by the mod team. This helps to weed out trolls and ban evaders.
• We rely on Automoderator to scan for specific words and phrases that are not welcome here and notify the mod team to review the comment or post. This includes slurs of any type and platitudes such as "Love them as your own!"
• The mod team uses a combination of blacklisting and banning when dealing with trolls.
• We employ the use of a bot that automatically bans anyone who comments in subs that have historically harassed our users. If you are picked up by the bot for telling trolls to get fucked, reach out via mod mail and we'll get you sorted out.
• The rules above as well as ban procedures are considered guidelines only; some deviation may be necessary on a case by case basis and/or at the mod team's discretion.

13. Ban Procedure

These actions are at moderator discretion.

• Pornography will result in an automatic permanent ban.
• Extremely egregious content will result in an immediate permanent ban.
• You may receive a 7 or 30 day temporary ban for first and second rule violations, depending upon severity.
• Continued rule violations will result in a permanent ban.
• Willful attempts to avoid or bypass temporary bans will result in a permanent ban.
• We recognize the reddit site-wide rules of using alt names to get around bans and will ban those as well as report them to reddit admins.

​
​

FAQ - About the Rules

What does Kindness Matters mean?

• Shortest version? Don't be an asshole. People come here for support and advice, they do not come here to be yelled at or told they are the reason everything is going sideways. There are ways to point out that someone may want to do some reflection on their own actions and reactions without being an asshole about it.
• The purpose of this subreddit is to provide support and a sense of belonging for struggling stepparents. We aren't here to pass judgement, but rather to offer support, empathy, and constructive commentary. That does not include "hard truths" or "tough love." Stepparents get enough of that in every other subreddit, we're not passing it out here. Be respectful.
• Remember, most people aren't going to come to a sub like this when everything is going great and everyone is getting along. People are coming here when they are down, when they are feeling defeated and stretched to the limit. Kicking someone when they are down is shitty behavior and we don't tolerate it.

What about being kind to the kids?

• "Won't somebody think of the children?" Pearl clutching isn't needed here. If you read the Kindness Matters rule closely, you will see that there is a clause in there about name calling children. We don't allow it. We also don't allow people rolling in telling OP that they feel sorry for their stepkids because OP is feeling overwhelmed and overloaded.
• If anyone is advocating slapping, spanking, or any other form of violence, report the comment immediately. We do not advocate violence towards children of any sort. The mod team does not advocate any sort of physical punishment at any time.
• Venting about behaviors is not the same as insulting the kids. However, if you see a post or comment where kids are being name called or dragged to the point of no return, use the report button. We try to catch the posts and remove them before they hit the sub, but we cannot see every comment without your help. Use the report button to bring problematic comments to our attention. Don't engage in a war of words on our subreddit.

Why is this sub such an echo chamber?

• Not allowing contributors to pile on and tell OP that they are a terrible human being who should never be around children does not equate to being an echo chamber. Many contributors here will offer OP suggestions to help them work through their resentments and frustrations, and the most egregious situations are called out. We simply ask that it be called out with respect.
• If you feel that a post is simply too much for you to handle without following the rules, move on to another post.
• If you believe that a post itself is crossing the rules report it. If the mod team has approved the post, it is because the mod team believes that the OP needs help from the community or needs a moment to vent and move on from their vent. That does not give you license to pile on disrespectfully. Unless it is proven that OP is a bot, assume that OP is a human being with real thoughts and feelings and has posted from a place of vulnerability.

Why can't I tell OP that they are an asshole?

• Because this isn't a judgement sub. We aren't AITA, we don't want to be AITA.
• Comments with terms like YTA, NTA, ESH, NAH will be removed.
• Don't start your posts with INFO either. We generally recognize that as a fishing attempt for more information to pass judgement on OP, and again, we are not a judgment sub.

But OP asked if they were an asshole?!

• Their post somehow got past our automoderator. Just use the report button. We will address it with OP.
• If you've asked if you are an asshole, a-hole, a*hole, a**hole, whatever, don't be surprised if your post is removed without warning. This isn't a judgment sub. If you want judgment, you know where to go.

What is a gendered slur?

• While it seems that everyone understands what racist slurs are, people struggle understanding the concept of gendered slurs. Generally speaking, we are talking about derogatory nouns or verbs that are used to negatively describe people or situations based on gendered terms.
• We've gone back and forth on this a few times, and the truth is, we get it, it's your safe space and you want to be able to vent about BM/BD how you want to vent about them, without us telling you how to vent about them. Fair enough. Vent away. What we are going to stick to here how people are referring to other users and to stepchildren.
• Examples that are not allowed:
  • "My SD is such a little bitch."
  • "She dresses/acts like a slut."
  • "My SS acts like a pussy."
  • "My SS is such a beta male."
  • "You are all fucking whores."
  • "Any dude who is raising some sluts kids is a cuck!"
  • "Little Lord Fauntleroy over here thinking he runs the house!"
  • "You're just the bangnanny, get used to it."
• Don't call users here names, don't call stepchildren names.
• Masking the term with asterisks or other neat little tricks might get you around the bot, but if we see it, we're removing it and quite possibly giving you a time out. The intended word is still there and you deliberately tried to skate the rule.
• As there is not enough space to list every term that is offensive and does not belong, nor every situation in which term or phrase may be allowable in context, this rule is enforced based on moderator discretion.

Seriously? You are the language police now?

• We're here to talk about stepparenting. And we would like for that to happen in a respectful way. Attacking each other doesn't help. Belittling stepchildren draws in trolls who don't understand your frustration, all they see is an evil stepmonster talking shit on the internet about a poor, innocent baby. Yes, even if that "poor, innocent baby" just robbed you blind and set fire to the house on their way out the door. That's just how it goes.
• We are aware that this is a relatively new rule and a lot of older posts and comments contain a lot of problematic language, including some from mods themselves. We are growing and evolving, and rules change as the sub grows and evolves.

What does No Drama really mean?

• Pretty much what it says, do not bring drama from other subs into this sub. Do not engage in vote brigades. Do not try to incite other subscribers to riot in a different sub. Don't follow posters into this sub from other subs to continue to harass them. Do not badger someone or derail threads. Do not harass community members because you don't agree with them. There's enough drama in the daily lives of subscribers, more isn't needed.

What is thread derailment?

• When a comment chain has devolved to the point where all you are doing is arguing back and forth with someone about the same thing over and over again, you have derailed the thread. Also known as bickering. It's what children do. We assume if people are in a stepparent role they are adults. We expect you to act like it.
• If you aren't a stepparent, or in a stepparenting role, consider that perhaps this subreddit isn't for you. If you want to participate, do so with respect. Thread derailment, arguing, bickering, and nitpicking are not allowed.

But what if they didn't answer my question?

• No one has to answer your questions. This is a support sub, not an inquisition. Jumping on a bandwagon with "OP is evading the question" in a 20 comment long chain is the epitome of thread derailment. You'll find more information about trolling below and how this might be considered such.

Why am I being silenced? I'm just asking for a back and forth!

• Thread derailment, badgering, and nitpicking are considered harassment. Continued harassment of either community members or mods will get you banned.

Why can't I look at someone's post history and comment about it?

• No mod in the history of this sub has ever once said post histories are forbidden. What we do frown upon is using someone's post history to attack, belittle, or otherwise harass someone.
• Example Post: "My stepkid's mom really hates me. How can I make this better?"
  • Okay: "Based on the timeline and your post history, it looks like this may have started as an affair. Unfortunately there's going to be outstanding issues for a long time due to that. Try focusing on yourself and how you can move forward without worrying about how someone else feels about you."
  • Not Okay: "Holy shit! You were the OW! What the hell do you expect, homewrecker?!"
• Example Post: "I am completely overloaded and feeling very down about myself."
  • Okay: "In your post history you mentioned that your spouse wasn't really helping around the house. Has that changed at all?"
  • Not Okay: "LOL, you already got the answers you need in your post on relationships. You are stupid for sticking with your lazy spouse."

Why can't we crosspost stuff to other subs?

• We can't stop you from doing so. The problem isn't that something has been crossposted, it's when the community that it's been crossposted to feels the need to come over here and harass OP. When we see that happening, we lock the post and start passing out bans. If you did the crossposting, you'll be banned. If you participated in the brigading, you'll be banned.

What if it's my own post?

• Again, we can't stop you from doing so. We prefer that you don't technically crosspost, but rather just copy and paste your post. Why? Because inevitably the above will happen. Redditors from other subs will follow you back to /stepparents and start attacking users here. It just happens.

What is "brigading"?

• Reddit defines vote manipulation and brigading as follows:
• Using multiple accounts, voting services, or any other software to increase or decrease vote scores.
• Asking people to vote up or down certain posts, either on Reddit itself or through social networks, messaging, etc. for personal gain.
• Forming or joining a group that votes together, either on a specific post, a user's posts, posts from a domain, etc.
• We, along with pretty much every other subreddit that has ever had to deal with this nonsense, further define brigading as this: You saw a post on another sub that linked to our sub either via a link in a comment or a crosspost. It was basically saying something along the lines of "OMG, check out these assholes over on /stepparents! They literally hate all their stepkids!" And then you and your friends come over and start hammering on OP and telling OP how much they suck. Congrats, you have just participated in a brigade.

What is this whole Report, Don't Rant thing about?

• If you see a post or comment that breaks the rules, instead of engaging, report it. When you report it, it sends notification to the mod team. We will act on it where appropriate. Engaging with bad faith users may result in your comments being removed. If you repeatedly do so, you may end up being banned.

What if I see an obvious troll?

• Report it.

What if they are being really mean in comments?

• Report it.

What if they are harassing me in private messages?

• Step 1: Report them to admins. You can report harassment to reddit by using this link or send a DM to reddit admins. Include the link to the DM, admins can see your inbox and providing a direct link is helpful for them to weed out bad actors.
• Step 2: Block the person so they cannot directly contact you again.
• Step 3: Send us a mod mail and let the mod team know. Tell us who they are and what they said, send us a screenshot if you can - admins can see your DMs, mods can't. We'll take action where necessary by banning from the sub if they aren't already banned.

What do you mean by No Naming & Shaming?

• Just as we prefer to not be linked to or crossposted from, we do not allow linking to or calling out other subs by name. If you see something you want to share, say it's a hot post that has hit the front page and a stepparent is being absolutely flayed, just refer to it as "that hot post that hit the front page." If you want to complain about other places in general, "other parenting/advice/judgement subs" will suffice. Absolutely under no circumstances should you link to anywhere else.

I can't link to other subs?

• Do not directly link to another sub. (e.g.: "/insertsubnamehere is ridiculously hostile to stepparents!")
• Do not name other subs. (e.g.: "I won't link to it directly, but insertsubnamehere is ridiculously hostile to stepparents!")
• Do not abbreviate other subs. (e.g.: "I know that ISNH is ridiculously hostile to stepparents!")

I can't ping other users?

• Do not summon another user with a username ping/tag. (e.g.: "insertusernamehere was being an asshole.")
• If you are agreeing with someone, it is okay to link to them. (e.g.: "I agree with insertusernamehere, you need to take a couple of steps back and reflect on this.")

What does No Platitudes mean?

• Sanctimonious, overused clichés that grossly oversimplify the stepparenting experience are neither wanted nor allowed here. We have all heard it a thousand times before, we don't need to hear it again. It's not nearly as insightful and wise as some would like to think.

Why don't you people understand it's a package deal?

• Any comment that suggests that OP should have known what they were getting involved with, or that they needed to understand that the kids were part of some package they needed to accept before signing up for marriage is subject to immediate removal.
• This is one of the most insensitive things you can say to a stepparent. Most stepparents were aware of the children, but they were probably not aware of all of the family dynamics.

Why can't you just love them like they are your own?

• Demanding that a stranger you do not know love children that are not biologically theirs as if they were theirs can be incredibly damaging to someone who is already in a vulnerable situation. Any comment that falls along these lines will be removed.

What do you mean by No Trolling? I was just...

• No means no. No trolling. No pretending to be a stepparent and then whipping out the Greatest Hits Bingo Card of The Worst Stepparent in the History of Stepparents. We see you. We've seen you a thousand times.

What does "concern trolling", "gish-galloping", and "sealioning" have to do with stepparenting? This isn't a debate sub, why are you using debate terms?

• That's absolutely right, this isn't a debate sub. And yet, here we are, day after day, having to defend ourselves against this sort of thing. So, enough. No more. Usage of any of these things will get you banned.

What is "Concern Trolling?"

• A concern troll is someone who disingenuously visits sites of an opposing ideology to disrupt conversation by offering unwanted advice on how to solve problems which do not really exist.
  • Example Post: OP expresses concern that she will feel, and possibly act, differently towards her stepchildren after her husband decides that no, he doesn't want anymore children after all.
  • Example Concern Troll pulled from actual mod mail after their comment was removed: "Possible child abuse claims need to be sorted out well before whatever empathy you believe the OP was looking for."

What is a "Devil's Advocate"?

• "I'm just playing devil's advocate here, but have you considered that maybe BM is just really tired and needs a break, too?" BM has dozens of different mom based subs alone on reddit she can complain on, this sub is for stepparents. The stepparent doesn't need to consider that maybe BM is just really tired and needs a break.

"Gish-galloping?" What does that even mean?

• The Gish Gallop is the fallacious debate tactic of drowning your opponent in a flood of individually-weak arguments in order to prevent rebuttal of the whole argument collection without great effort. The Gish Gallop is a conveyor belt-fed version of the on the spot fallacy, as it's unreasonable for anyone to have a well-composed answer immediately available to every argument present in the Gallop.

And "sealioning?" What's that?

• Sealioning involves jumping into a conversation with endless polite, reasonable questions and demands for answers, usually of entry-level topics far below the actual conversation (e.g. "please prove sexism exists"). This tactic differs little from harassment; instead of discussion, the point is to derail discussion, receive criticism (for their ignorance) so as to look like a victim, or to make someone feel overwhelmed and quit talking.

Who gets to define what is considered asshattery?

• The mod team, of course! If we feel that comments are out of line, are trolling, are leading up to a fight or "just asking questions", we are going to remove them and most likely ban the offender.

​
​

FAQ - Sub Questions

Posting Guidelines for Stepparents

• Body text is required, we suggest you use line breaks between paragraphs as a wall of text is difficult to read. Posts that have only a title are likely to be removed. Instead of using names (even fictitious ones), try to use the sub acronyms. It helps our users to follow along if you use the acronyms and not names.
• Assign a post flair that accurately describes what your post is about and what you are seeking. If you are posting an update from a previous post, include a link to that post.
• Flairs are applied to posts to determine what a person is looking for. When submitting a new post, you should choose a flair that specifies if you are looking for advice, support, etc. The following link flair is available and is color coded with side bar links so that you can search by flair:
  • Advice - For when you are specifically asking for advice or help.
  • Announcement - Mod Use Only, for subreddit announcements.
  • Daily (Formerly TTP) - Mod Use Only, for our daily discussion threads.
  • Discussion - A little advice, a little "How does your family handle this?"
  • JustBMThings - Pretty sure this is self explanatory!
  • Legal - Asking for legal advice? Tag it with this!
  • Miscellany - Just a sort of off topic thing? Use this tag.
  • Resource - Sharing a good resource or asking for one? This is the tag you need!
  • Support - For those days when you want nothing but a good old fashioned cry and some community love.
  • Update - Updating us on something that you posted about previously? Use this one!
  • Vent - We all need to vent sometimes. Respect the tag as a vent. This isn't how OP talks all day every day.
  • Win! - Celebrate those wins with us with this tag!
  • Megathread - Mod Use Only, for large mega threads (typically around major calendar events.)

Posting Guidelines for Bioparents

• Stepparents is a support community for stepparents, by stepparents. As bioparents, you may want to have more insight into how the stepparent in your life feels or thinks. You may have questions on how to ease the transition for your partner. However, please keep in mind that this community was not created for you. It was created for your partner or your ex's partner. If you are seeking support on how to deal with a stepparent, there are other subs more suited for your situation and your post is subject to removal.
• There are some posts from bioparents we will accept:
  • Seeking advice on how to support your partner as they navigate stepparenting
  • Seeking resources to help you better support your partner
  • Seeking resources for your partner
• There are some posts from bioparents we will not accept:
  • Complaints about how the stepparent is too involved in your kids lives
  • Vents about how the stepparent is not involved enough in your kids lives
  • "Cautionary tales" advising stepparents to back off
  • Seeking advice on how to tell the stepparent to back off
  • The Do's and Dont's of Stepparenting
  • How your kid's stepmom is literally The Worst
• Comments from bioparents that are helpful and supportive are welcome and appreciated. Comments from bioparents that are not helpful or supportive are not welcome and subject to removal. There are several other subs that may meet the needs of bioparents better than we can. We recommend /coparenting, /parenting, /parents, /blendedfamilies, and /singleparents as starting points.

Guidelines for Stepkids

• At this time, we do not generally accept posts from stepkids. Comments from stepkids that are helpful and supportive are welcome and appreciated. Comments from stepkids that are not helpful or supportive are not welcome and subject to removal. If you are a stepkid seeking support, we highly recommend /stepkids. It is a very supportive community specifically for stepkids. We also recommend /blendedfamilies as another potential group for support.

What the heck are all these acronyms? I'm confused!

• Check out the Common Acronyms wiki page. We try to keep this updated as new terms are introduced to the sub.

Why aren't my posts or comments showing up?

• New posters and accounts go through a waiting period before their posts will show in the sub and the comments on posts automatically. During the new account approval period the mod team will check posts to be sure you aren't attempting to circumvent a ban with a shiny new account. Please be patient while the timer runs down on your "new" status and the mod team approves your posts and responses.

Why was my comment removed?

• Comments are removed when they do not follow the rules of the sub. These rules are published in several places for your reading pleasure.
• Comments are removed at moderator discretion. In some cases your comment may be removed while another remains up. If you find this to be the case, and you believe the comment to be violating the rules, instead of arguing with mods or demanding they remove the additional comments, just report it.

This comment/post is really offensive! Why is it still up?

• All moderators are volunteers and have busy real lives. Sometimes things get past us. The best thing you can do is report anything you find offensive or inflammatory. It's the quickest and most reliable way of alerting us to an issue.

I've received a hurtful/unwanted PM from someone about my recent post. What should I do?

• If you receive an unwanted/hurtful PM from a name you don't recognize, please report it to Reddit Admins using our handy pre-populated form. Be sure to include the permalink to the message. We've been dealing with a few unhappy folks who like to attack stepparents, and reporting it to the admins is the only way to make it stop.

What are the general moderator guidelines?

• Users are expected to know the rules before posting. If you are warned or banned for violating the rules, ignorance is not an excuse.
• Moderators will remove posts and comments and/or lock threads in accordance with the rules above. Typically this happens when threads have gone off-topic in a way that is not productive for the OP, or comments overall have become contentious or disrespectful.
• If a poster continues to argue or to willfully violate these rules, temporary and permanent ban procedures will be followed. Any attempts to avoid or bypass temporary bans will result in a permanent ban. User bans will not be discussed in the sub. Questions posted about user bans are subject to removal and the poster subject to warning/ban procedures. The mod team will not discuss a specific user ban with anyone other than the user involved.
• New accounts are subject to manual approval until they are no longer deemed "new" by the mod team. This helps to weed out trolls and ban evaders.
• We rely on Automoderator to scan for specific words and phrases that are not welcome here and notify the mod team to review the comment or post. This includes slurs of any type and platitudes such as "Love them as your own!"
• The mod team uses a combination of blacklisting and banning when dealing with trolls.
• We employ the use of a bot that automatically bans anyone who comments in subs that have historically harassed our users. If you are picked up by the bot for telling trolls to get fucked, reach out via mod mail and we'll get you sorted out.
• The rules above as well as ban procedures are considered guidelines only; some deviation may be necessary on a case by case basis and/or at the mod team's discretion.

I've been wrongly banned/Why can't I comment here?

• Due to an influx of harassment from users with specific user histories, we have employed a user history ban bot as described above. If you think this has affected you and wish to appeal, please message the mods.

Why was I banned without warning?

• There are numerous reasons that the mod team might opt to move perm banning without warning. Message the moderators if you have specific questions.

Greetings, citizens! I'm a writer, mostly freelance, but I've been working on my own setting for a while now. I've already described some of the basics of how my world is organized in the two posts on another subreddit, so I won't repeat them unnecessarily. Long story short: this is an alternate world that has deposits of metastable metallic hydrogen, concentrated at deep waters and in cold regions. Hydrogen, instead of oil, is the basis of the world's economy here, the corporations that have grown from its extraction and use have more power than governments. The political map of the world is different from our own, with different forces at play than we are used to.
The main setting is the city of Neone, located somewhere on the coast of the Balkan Peninsula. I won't specify a particular place or pick a certain country for its location. Instead, I will take some features from some various ones to add local flavor. As one of the largest trading hubs in the world, this city is very wealthy, but it's the kind of wealth that easily slips through your fingers. Everything is buying and selling here, and human life is just as much a bargaining chip. Life in Neone is determined by the actions that the Players, the main political forces in the city, take with one another. Relations between them can swing from friendship to hostility... Or sometimes a combination of both at the same time. So, here's a preliminary list of the ones I've already come up with:
CORPORATIONS:
Astara Industries is the “beauty industry” in all its forms. Silk and gold, perfume and cosmetics. Modeling, music, entertainment, plastic surgery, and escort services. Rumored to be involved in much darker affairs, but that doesn't stop a lot of young guys and especially girls from trying their luck and signing another cabal contract with Astara. The higher the ranks of their employees, the more the corporation seems to be a kind of cult that worships the very idea of beauty itself. Recently, this company has been investing colossal amounts of money into an ambitious project designed to stop aging and mortality.
Change Inc. is a pretty mysterious organization that primarily provides construction and design services as well as financial operations and data protection services. On deeper layers lies espionage and information trading to anyone who can offer a more interesting price for it.
Chapek's Clockworks is the other major robotics company that has dominated the market for quite a while. Now they are more famous for their retro designs and sponsorship of the theatrical scene.
Chimera Chemicals is a biochemical giant that once started out as a fertilizer manufacturer. Now they deal in just about everything chemical related, including weapons, and also sponsor gene modifications.
Dragonfruit Digital is a world famous software and electronics developer that was leading the market before the rapid... well, rise of Risen Robotics.
Friture Science is a food concern dedicated to the mission of feeding the world. In addition to natural products, they develop synthetic ones as well as a number of associated products.
Fortuna Fishing - seafood production in Neone coastal waters and also beyond and deeper. Some of the things they found deep in the waters made them a little bit... Well, superstitious.
Greenfield Gardens - Similar in many ways to the previous one, this company focuses on environmental protection and recycling methods. Owns many farms and gardens in the city and beyond. Genetic modifications, too.
Hecate Guaranty is a law and insurance company. Deals with all possible disputes of their clients, property issues, and more. When required and paid decently, can provide a person or group of people a new life and a new home.
International Inc. is the most boring company in the world. Originally a construction contractor they pioneered the technology of rapid modular building. Because of this, International Inc. quickly built up capital and influence by rebuilding cities after wars. Eventually they expanded into selling associated products and services, then logistics, recruiting personnel... And now International Inc. provides half of the world's products. Each of their products is completely featureless, but they get the job done at an acceptable price.
Keller & Crow is one of Europe's largest arms manufacturers, dating back to World War I, or maybe even earlier. Known for their high quality and appropriate prices.
Keller-Tec is, in more than one sense, a daughter corporation of Keller & Crow. It develops the most cutting-edge custom weapon and gear systems. It works closely with Risen Robotics and actively funds the Fountain of Good.
Kiki Courier Company is a network of independent couriers working through the app. Moving around the roofs of Neone, they are able to deliver a small cargo personally in their hands for those who don't trust big companies.
Matsubayashi Motors is a Japanese vehicle manufacturer. Raised on defense contracts, they now make anything that can carry a human in it, from scooters and cars to aircraft and bolides.
MOLOT manufactures is another major arms manufacturer in Europe. In fact a franchise that sells to factories around the world the rights to produce copies of their world famous models. Their designs are a bit crude, but reliable and durable.
Poseidon's Possibilities - A marine transportation company that plays an important role in city and global shipping. Considering the high risk of piracy, possess pretty good assets to protect themselves, and sometimes execute third-party orders in coastal zones.
Risen Robotics is one of the world's important corporations. Creating innovative neural chip technology, Risen Robotics quickly earned financial and political capital and aiming for more. They were the first to commercialize a truly cheap and mass-produced android called the Peacebringer, and these robots can be seen in the military, security companies, and even as security guards in the market and malls and as bouncers in nightclubs. Building its influence, Risen Robotics aims to actively bring its tech into the lives of everyone in the world... And then their gaze will be directed higher into the skies and to the stars.
Royal Arms - Once a major weapons company, they are now more focused on the civilian market and support tools. Their high-precision tools and cybernetic limbs are widely used in civilian and military markets, as well as the medicine and even space industries.
Strigoi Sovereign is a company with a long history of working with private customers. They originally focused on hunting and harvesting of high-value resources, but gradually expanded. Nowadays, they are known for their customized combat enhancements, whether it be tough training and gear customization as well as biological, chemical, and cybernetic enhancements. Among all forms of payment, they prefer transactions in precious metals.
Van Nueve Innovations is another deep genetic research company. After their role in human trafficking and criminal experiments was revealed, their assets were mostly shut and sold down. Now their stuff keeps popping up on the black market - though, in this city, the difference between the regular and black market is barely noticeable.
Vulcan Weaponry is another firearm company with a long history, with a good reputation for their trusted builds, high quality and classy designs. Among the mercenary world, their weapons and equipment is considered indicators of prestige and good taste.
PRIVATE MILITARY COMPANIES:
Deepwater is a notorious American PMC with a well-deserved dirty reputation. Their Sigma division deployed in Neone has been caught in the middle of scandals more than once.
FIREBIЯD - Russian PMC, looking after order in and around Neone. Having a small size they are all carefully selected by their leader and follow him into both fire and water.
Ryujin - Japanese PMC, which has a good social image and actively finances all kinds of entertainment.
Schwarzwald is a German PMC with a long-standing reputation and connections. It usually works for the benefit of Western European clients and has a long history of cooperation with the Keller family.
Keller's Claws is a passion project of Alex Keller, CEO of Keller-Tec. A small and elite female PMC, operating in the interests of their mistress or executing carefully selected contracts around the world.
This is not all PMCs in the city, but only those that are not directly linked to specific corporations that were listed above.
GANGS:
The Blazer is a broad and diverse group of radical anarchists. They are mostly drawn to the destruction of corporate property and speculation about “power of the people”, but some of their members are not averse to almost any type of work.
The Crooked Circle is another cult-like gang, or vice versa. They focus on collecting unique technology, but aren't particularly successful at it. But they're still alive and kicking, praying that their mechanical messiah will save them.
The Grey Court Syndicate is the largest criminal organization in the city, and one of the largest in Europe, maybe even in the entire world. Reminiscent of the classic Mafia. On one side they have the exterior gloss, protecting order and running legal businesses, but on the other side they have human and organ trafficking, prostitution and assassinations for hire. The Grey Court is one of the main sources of migrants in Neone.
The Himmelreich is a disorganized gang fighting for the “purity of humanity”. They oppose the very fact of existence of chimeras and cyborgs in this world. In fact are useful fools for the real Players in the city.
The Tulips are something between a gang and a religious sect. Spoken with Christian-like mottos, they attract beggars and cripples to their ranks, especially focusing on PMC veterans and former corporate workers, but in fact they accept all the desperate. They have squatted some ruins on the outskirts of the city, including the abandoned greenhouse that gave them their name. However... They are rapidly expanding their influence and their source of funding remains unknown.
OTHERS:
The City Council is the primary administration of the city. They manage, but they don't reign. They are a handful of exhausted clerks, doing the hard work that no one else accepted to do. Basically maintain the city's communications and keep the Players away from killing each other and too many ordinary citizens.
The Forge is a secret organization that exists for a very long time and runs deeply secured operations all over the world. They believe it's their duty to protect humanity from dangerous ideas, technologies, and obscure subjects such as [UNKNOWN]. Forge is often found to be a puppeteer, directing the actions of other Players or certain individuals.
The Fountain of Good is a globally respected charity organization primarily focused on orphanages. One of the few Players who maintains truly bright ideals. The children who grow up usually become corporate employees afterwards. Other Players fund them mainly to launder money, calm their karma and create a positive public image for themselves.
The Nuevians are a deep-covered organization slowly gaining influence in the city. They are led by an artificially created living entity known only as "The Queen" that seeks to bring prosperity to the planet. They have good intentions, but fear to repeat the fate of the Zero Cycle.
The Union of Nations Peacekeepers - maintaining a shred of peace in the aftermath of the Incident, a massive earthquake that recently struck Neone. Many urban areas have since descended into chaos and lawlessness, while others live as if nothing has happened or are experiencing minimal inconvenience. The competency of these soldiers is questionable and they are barely supplied.
The Volunteer Vanguards are an organization that maintains order in those Neone districts where the City Council or other Players do not. Generally a barely trained and armed militia, but there are some skilled veterans and former corporate workers in their ranks.
The Workers Ring is Neone's major blue collar association. They support city communications so they have a lot of influence. Individual members may or may not be involved in working for other Players and illegal activities. The second meaning of the "Ring" word is also utilized - many members of this community are known for their passion for arena fighting.
The Zero Cycle is a secret organization of intelligent machines once created by a rogue AI. Several Players united to destroy this threat, leading to the Incident. Now, shards of the Cycle's technology, superior to anything created by humanity, is the most valuable hunting treasure in Neone. Owning one of them means risking the lives of yourself and your loved ones, but that rarely stops hunters who desire wealth or driven by some personal reasons.
Well, that's the draft. Any ideas, suggestions, any other feedback?

17 days ago, a member of this sub posted about Ivanna Sakhno joining M3GAN 2.0, we got some comments on the post, and then 3 days ago the OP deleted the post, thereby also removing everyone else's comments from visibility.
I believe that OP is in the habit of automatically deleting their posts after 2 weeks. Since I haven't been given a reason for this, I'm here restoring the comments (which were deleted without consulting their authors), but not the original post (whose author wanted it deleted).
I could restore the comments because I commented myself: by accessing your comments on your own Reddit profile, you can see threads to which you contributed even if the original post has been deleted, including other people's comments on that thread. You just can't get the original post back.
Should any of these comment authors wish their comment to be removed, please say and I will edit it out. Also, if there really is a good reason to delete this entire thread, please contact me or a mod and we'll do it. But my default assumption is we probably want this discussion to be preserved, and the OP's deletion of the entire discussion was a mistake, so here it is.

‘Ahsoka’s Ivanna Sakhno To Co-Star Opposite Allison Williams In Atomic Monster & Blumhouse’s ‘M3GAN 2.0’

Sorry, this post was deleted by the person who originally posted it.
Top-level comment from Jazzlike-Movie-930•17d ago•Edited 17d ago: 4 upvotes:
Here are my theories on which character she will play in M3gan 2.0:

1. She will play Gemma’s rival toy company engineeroboticist.
2. She will play an intern at the Funki Toy company or rival toy company.
3. She will be the voice of Am3lia (the rumored antagonist) of M3gan 2.0.
4. The last theory I have is unlikely but possible. She plays an adult version of M3gan and M3gan looks human. That said, M3gan will probably have that child doll face again in M3gan 2.0 so that makes this theory unlikely.

It should be a big role she landed though and I look forward to seeing her in M3gan 2.0.
Reply Budd96•17d ago•Edited 17d ago: 3 upvotes:
The both 1 and 3 would be a high possibilities for her role in Sequel.
But I still believe she's going to be AM3LIA's Roboticist.
Reply from Jazzlike-Movie-930•17d ago: 1 upvote:
I agree that #1 is probably the most likely option but I would not be surprised if she voices Am3lia. If she is the voice of Am3lia, then Amelia needs to look like a teenage or young adult robot doll or look like an older sister to M3gan.
Reply from Budd96•17d ago•Edited 17d ago: 1 upvote:
Well, M3GAN and AM3LIA are both going to be older in Sequel, both of them will not have relations to each other.
Reply from AntiAmericanismBrit•17d ago: 3 upvotes:
Congratulations to Ivanna for landing the role and congratulations to the M3GAN team for getting her.
We have absolutely no idea who she'll play, but if theories are fun, I don't think they'll mind a bit of wild mass guessing going on.
I agree "adult M3GAN" is unlikely for this actress, because we're told her part is major. It's possible the film might end with an "in the future all grown up" scene, but we have no reason to think that will be the main part of the film (I mean Violet McGraw is 13 now, not 23), and therefore any actor involved in the "all grown up" scene (if it happens) won't count as a major part. (Well it might become a major part in the THIRD film if they go that way, but not in the second.)
Voice of a robot is possible, but would they really hire Ivanna just for her voice? Unlike Jenna Davis, Ivanna doesn't seem to have much of a history of doing voice work. She's very much an actress who gets seen on the screen. So I think the odds of this one are quite low (but I might be proven wrong).
but Shin Hati is a villain in the Star Wars franchise, and if an actress plays a villain in one film, she's more likely to be a villain in another. (But not necessarily!)
I'm not sure if rival roboticists and bosses etc count as "major" parts if all they do is set a robot going and then get off the set. A colleague might if they're hands-on enough. It depends how major you mean by major.
Right now I think the simplest explanation is the Amelia rumour is wrong and the plot will be completely different from what we were expecting. But let's see what they tell us later.
Reply from Budd96•6d ago•Edited 6d ago: 1 upvote:
I don't think AM3LIA plot rumor is wrong at all, there's some truth to it, if the AM3LIA is rumor is wrong, who took the Schematic Files than rival roboticist, it can't be Gemma it wouldn't make sense taking the Schematic Files when she was the original creator of M3GAN, it could be M3GAN herself, but she has some limitations to control any robotic systems that don't have AI integrated, she's probably need human help to create her a new body, that's where Ivanna Sakhno's Character comes in to help.
Reply from AntiAmericanismBrit•3d ago: 1 upvote:
well a lot of options were left open with the files Kurt stole. The main Doylist (real-world) reason for having that in the original film was so M3GAN could call him out on it in the elevator as part of her gaslighting setup.
It might also suggest a history of Kurt leaking Funki secrets to the competitor that made Furzees from Purrpetual Petz and thereby making Funki management feel the competitors are too good at getting stuff quickly, which means M3GAN needs to be launched fast, hence pressure to cut corners. But I think in the case of Furzees that clone could be done quickly from the off-the-shelf product anyway without needing the files (the files might actually slow them down, because they'd get Gemma's listening model tech and the point was to take that out to make the toy cheaper).
Anyway, as of end of M3GAN:

1. We don't know whether or not Kurt managed to leak those files before he was killed,
2. If Kurt did not manage to leak the files, we still don't know whether or not they might still be found by his relatives or by investigators going through his things after his death,
3. Even if Kurt didn't leak them and nobody looked at his docs, it might still be possible for someone else to get hold of the same files off of Funki's system,
4. If somebody does get hold of the files, how easy would it be to use them? When I write code for internal use only, I sometimes fail to explain it properly, meaning I'm probably the only one who can actually use that code without considerable effort. Films depicting stolen code as instantly usable are not actually realistic. I think it would be a great sub-plot if whoever gets the files can't make sense of them until M3GAN-online pops up to help them out with the job. Either that or they have to work for a very long time which explains the delay between the films. Or they have to work for a very long time and then M3GAN-online helps them finish.
5. We also don't know if the files are needed at all. Maybe M3GAN-online can tell whoever she likes how to build a robot designed by M3GAN herself that is better than the one described in those files. Or something drastic happens to totally change the attitude of Funki or Gemma or Cady and they're the ones who rebuild M3GAN. Or something else.

The only thing we do know is, Shakno's character will be "major". I'm not sure what counts as "major" in this case but normally it's things like: appearing in many scenes throughout the film, heavy effect on the plot, and perhaps some character development along the way. I'm not entirely sure that just rebuilding a robot in a couple of scenes is enough to make the character "major". But that doesn't rule out the possibility of Shakno's character rebuilding the robot plus also playing some other role that makes her major, like babysitting Cady for an extended period or something. We don't know; could be anything.
Reply from leytonk_tx•10d ago: 3 upvotes:
Wouldn’t make sense to cast Ivanna who doesn’t do voiceover work at all and is purely an actress for a voice role. I’m going on a hunch just by her previous roles and what she’s good at that she will be the primary antagonist of some kind. Makes the most sense. Uncertain about this Amelia plot, idk if that is even true or if Ivanna’s looks will play a part in her role (porcelain skin, very wide eyes look that could play well into any type of doll/robot) so who knows. Anyways theatomicmonster on instagram reposted Adam Hendricks story from a couple days ago. Peep the directors laptop screen.
Top-level comment from Budd96•17d ago•Edited 17d ago: 2 upvotes:
I believe she's going to be Gemma's Rival/New Doll's Roboticist.
Top-level comment from Ok-Effective4500•6d ago: 1 upvote:
But as who?
Reply from Budd96•6d ago: 1 upvote:
The plot is not revealed yet, her role is currently unknown, but seeing her Play as Antagonist in other films, her character most likely going to help M3GAN to creating a new body and hunting down Gemma and Cady.
She coud be either rival roboticist or she's working from secret military government who worked on building Super-Integelligient Machines.
That's my guess for what she's going to be.

Some of the promises they have made in their manifesto seem like the final blow and nail in the coffin to Indian Democracy.
1. One nation one election, under the garb of saving costs will deal a deathly blow to our Democracy which is already in ICU.

1. Dilution of Regional Issues: State elections often focus on specific regional concerns, and combining them with national elections could overshadow these crucial matters
   
2. Reduced Accountability: Longer election cycles may reduce the frequency at which voters can hold governments accountable for their actions, potentially leading to complacency among elected representatives
   

1. When elections are staggered and spread across, it atleast keeps the national/multi-state parties on their toes and keeps them somewhat accountable and also allows for other states’ issues/national issues to affect state elections.
2.For example : Say a massive farmers protest occurs in Delhi and their ill treatment might influence voting decision of farmers in local states that are going to elections in the following months or a big corruption scandal that got exposed nationally might affect the same party’s prospects in the local elections.

1. The constitutional challenges of "One Nation One Election" intensify if a government is dissolved or dismissed prematurely. This scenario raises complex issues regarding synchronizing the terms of the Lok Sabha and State Legislative Assemblies, requiring amendments to Articles 83, 85, 172, 174, and 356 of the Constitution. The need to manage breaks due to dissolution, President's Rule, or hung assemblies poses significant hurdles, potentially undermining India's federal structure. Without proper synchronization and constitutional amendments, the proposal risks facing legal and structural criticisms, impacting the democratic fabric of the country.

2.UCC

1. UCC and Some sections of the new criminal laws are outright anti people and snatch away our freedoms. Like UCC requiring live in relationships registration and requiring scrutiny/consent from a police station guy, maintaining registry, and then after breakup

1. Anti-Woman and Anti-Democratic (Anti-Liberty and State interference in personal lives): The UCC is seen as anti-woman, anti-democratic, and draconian. It restricts adult women's sexual autonomy, allows for moral policing, and interferes in consensual relationships, including marriage and divorce

3.Criminalization and Penalties: The UCC is criticized for its heavy focus on penalties and punishment, creating a legal environment that criminalizes personal choices and relationships.
4 Exclusion of Tribes and Targeting Minorities: Critics highlight the exclusion of Scheduled Tribes (STs) from the UCC and its perceived targeting of Muslims. The law is viewed as a "Hindu Code" that imposes cultural values on all citizens, especially minorities
5.Registration of Live-In Relationships: Mandatory registration of live-in relationships is seen as intrusive, violating individual autonomy, and potentially leading to marital disputes, interference from authorities, and societal scrutiny

1. Selective Application and Double Standards: Critics argue that the UCC's selective application, exemptions for certain communities, and exclusion of tribal and minority groups undermine the law's claim to uniformity and equality
   
2. These criticisms collectively paint a picture of a UCC in Uttarakhand that is perceived as regressive, discriminatory, and detrimental to personal freedoms, especially in the context of relationships and breakups.
   

And then if BJP wins this time with almost similar results as 2019 and in worst case if it gains more seats, then it reinforces BJP’s mindset , attitude and gives them bold confidence that what they are doing does not matter to people

1. Manipur does not matter. They can get away with gross incompetence.

1. In any half decent democracy, this alone would be enough for a president’s rule to be enforced and state govt dismissed and army brought in.

4.Protests mean nothing to this govt and are dealt with force.

1. Farmers protest took over a year with 700+ deaths and we all saw how the recent farmer protests were treated almost as an infiltration into the country with nails,spikes, blockages etc
2.Wrestlers protest and nothing happened
3. Ladakh Protest

1. Not attending and not even acknowledging the protests and meeting the agitated is basic responsibility of a govt. Whether the demands are reasonable/feasible/logical or not is secondary. If govt believes they are unreasonable then govt should atleast meet them and explain and sort things out.*

1. Extreme Misuse of agencies does not matter.
   
2. Press freedom does not matter. PM holding a open press conference and being held accountable does not matter. PM coming to the the parliament and answering questions does not matter.
   
3. Passing bills without any discussion or debate does not matter
   
4. Suspending MPs for raising their voice does not matter, Mass suspension also does not matter
   
5. Use of governors to interfere in state govts functioning does not matter
   
6. Washing machine politics does not matter. People dont care
   
7. Communalism and Hate speech does not matter
   
8. Toppling govts doesnt matter
   
9. Election Commission and its discharge of constitutional duties does not matter
   
10. Using PMLA and UAPA on civil society activists does not matter
    
11. Electoral bonds does not matter
    
12. Covid mishandling does not matter
    
13. Weakening of democracy does not matter. CAG / RTI is being diluted..
    
14. Heck, rejecting opposition candidates’ nominations, forcing them to withdraw and win uncontested without even a single vote being cast like it happened in Indore,Surat and In Arunachal Pradesh, 10 BJP MLAs have been declared elected unopposed (they have simultaneous assembly and lok sabha elections)
    
15. I also have a distant fear that once NRC is brought in and implemented, Muslims might be particularly at the receiving end and a significant number of them might be declared as infiltrators. I dont know why I feel this , but I feel this more so after PM gave a blatant hate speech saying Muslims are those who have more kids and are infiltrators…
    

The list is endless and these are some of the major things that come to my mind and are certainly gloomy.
I seriously don’t have energy to fight the whataboutery and falsehoods spread about the INDIA Alliance..
Remember in India politics is not who is good and better than the other but rather who is the lesser evil…and it’s clear who the lesser evil is.
Amazing how People are willing to trade humanity, empathy and their freedoms/liberties/privacy, democracy, social harmony for infrastructure.
Its highly likely that BJP will return to power for 3rd term on their own. As much as I don’t want BJP to return , I’m starting to lose hope and I’m starting to believe in what Bhakts say , “Ayega toh modi hi” ,
So be mentally prepared (atleast I am)… Good luck and best wishes to all of us.

We have not had sex in more than 5 years. He has made a few idle comments that he wished we had more sex, but he’s never tried to have A Real Conversation about it. I now have zero libido, so I am fine with the current situation. But I worry he’s more upset than he lets on, and will leave me. We’re essentially roommates… but we’re damn good roommates and I neither want nor can afford to live alone. Should I just let sleeping dogs lie? Or try to discuss, which would mean telling him that I lost interest in sex because of his actions?
When we met, and for the first few years together, I was a very sexual person. He has never stimulated me orally; I tried hinting once, and he made it so clear the concept disgusted him that I never progressed to an actual request. (I still extended the favor, even though it was never returned.). But we were young, digital stimulation was usually enough, so I accepted that.
Move forward a few years, and perimenopause hit at the same time as a really stressful time at work. It became harder for me to orgasm, and he made it clear that annoyed him. There was eye-rolling, impatient huffing, and more than one exclamation of “how can you not be done YET?” I gave up trying to orgasm, and just told myself if the sex felt nice for a little while, that was enough. It wasn’t, and I started to dread sex and make excuses to delay it.
When my husband realized that I had given up trying to orgasm, he stopped any attempt to please me; digital stimulation was limited to making sure I wasn’t dry. Sex often hurt. I started drinking to get through it. He knew, and didn’t care. It got to the point where I blacked out during sex.
The last time we had sex, I passed out during the (limited as previously mentioned) so-called “foreplay.” My husband had sex with my unconscious body and I learned about it the next day. That was the nail in my libido’s coffin. It was bad enough that he lacked interest in giving me pleasure, but to violate my bodily autonomy like that… I just couldn’t imagine ever trusting him enough to be intimate again. I haven’t so much as fantasized since then. I tried reading erotica, watching sexy movies, daydreaming about past loves… I felt nothing.
I don’t miss sex, it’s like that part of myself flew away. Sometimes I half-wish that I missed it. But I worry that if I don’t find a way to force myself through it again, my husband is going to leave. We’re good friends and roommates, good as financial partners, and (his issues with weaponizing incompetence aside) a pretty good team overall. So… do I find the courage to broach the subject, or just sit tight? And if the former, how do I tell him that he’s the reason I went from having a high to a nonexistent libido?

For background context, I’m 33, gayer than christmas, and a nervous wreck.
Since 2019, I’ve experienced the death of (In order) my Step Dad, Grandmother, Sister, Mom, older Brother, and Step Mom. After my Grandmother passed, a sizable Family Trust was set up for me and my Dad. After my Mom passed, the state gave me custody of my little brother, so I used some of that money for a down payment for a nice house in a nice area— I wanted to get something stable and safe-feeling for my brother after such a tumultuous early childhood.
My husband has always tried to be supportive, or so I thought. I keep looking back though, and all I can remember are the times he’d give me shit for going to visit my grandmothemom when they were fighting their cancer battles. At one point, he even tried convincing me that my Mom was faking her illness, I think because he just didn’t like the area she lived in— a fairly ‘rough’ trailer park. He’s never had a job. I’ve tried here and there, but my depression always sucks me back underwater, and the Trust has effectively cut me off which lead to a wonderful case of ch 13 bankruptcy.
A year ago, I worked up the courage to try and file for divorce. Talked to an attorney, paid the retainer…. And then his dad (a family attorney himself) started listing all the ways he could have my little brother removed. I caved. I can’t lose my brother. I told myself that I was the problem somehow, and dropped the whole thing.
This past Tuesday, I woke up in crippling abdominal pain. Told the husband, who said he needed a shower. I waited ten minutes before I just grabbed my keys and left with a quick text on the way to urgentcare. I stumble into the waiting room and promptly pass out, night-night style. I guess they werent equipped to deal with that kind of thing because I then woke up in an ambulance (with the HOTTEST ems, I stg) being taken to a hospital. My phone is dead. Car is left at urgentcare. No idea where tf I’m being taken. Get rushed into a room and then get left for 30 minutes alone, bawling my eyes out with the thought that the cancer that took half my family has finally come for me. A nurse is kind enough to lend me her charger. My phone turns on… no calls or texts. Nothing. I call the husband who is asleep, irritated that I left without him, and that I woke him up. I don’t fight, I just tell him whats happening and where I am. A few agonizing hours later, I hobble out waiting for him. The last of my phone juice goes to the location I send him, and then I wait. And wait. And wait for two more hours (The hospital is 15 miles from our house).
I am a broken human being. Each death of my family chipped a little away, and on top of having to financially support myself, my teenage brother (who is a BLACK HOLE OF FOOD), and my… I gotta say it, my deadbeat husband… Underneath all of that, its hard to find the energy for.. anything, really. I just want to be happy again. I just want to feel like I have the freedom to heal. But I dont know where to find the strength to start. Therapy only goes so far, and meds only do so much. It takes action on my part, but I have no action left in me. I’m so tired. I miss my family.

Previous diary entry here: https://www.reddit.com/buffy/comments/1cuyf6k/rewatchers_diary_season_2_episodes_15_to_18/
The last sprint to the finish line: I Only Have Eyes for You (2x19), Go Fish (2x20), Becoming (2x21-2x22).
Man, I Only Have Eyes for You is such a beautiful gem of a composition. Go Fish is less bad than I remembered it (but still bottom-tier), Becoming FUCK YEAH!
I Only Have Eyes for You
It's the Sadie Hawkins dance and the gender roles are reversed—on BTVS, of all places ;-)
Xander suggests it's the brain child of a hairy-legged feminist and Cordelia is upset not only at losing her privilege of having her date pay for the date but also at having the tables turned all the way around and having to be the one who has to pay. Man I love the anti-chemistry of Xandelia.
But all is not well: Sunnydale high is haunted by the ghost of a student (James), whose romance with a teacher (Grace) was broken off by her. He responded with a murder-suicide which he is now reenacting. This is the mystery of the week.
The emotional significance is that Buffy identifies with James: she feels she betrayed and murdered Angel, unleashing Angelus. Her inability to kill Angelus in Innocence led to Jenny's death in Passion, which Buffy feels guilt about.
The punchline is Buffy and Angel(us) reenacting the ghost story, with Buffy in James' shoes, Angel surviving Buffy's murder attempt and preventing Buffy-as-James' suicide. Grace forgives James and says she never stopped loving him, the ghosts depart, Angel is back in his Angelus form who runs off.
Also, the final reveal: Spike, driven more crazy by Angelus, has been overstating his incapacitation.
I frigging love this episode.
I think Buffy's big change is her acceptance that Angel is dead, and that a demon (Angelus) has taken up shop in his body. It walks and it talks like Angel but it's no longer him. This has to be it, because the ghostly reenactment basically says that the Bangel love is forever and is still there even if Angel isn't—and yet, Buffy is more resolved and determined to kill Angelus than ever. This only makes sense if she's distinguishing between the two, i.e. if she's accepting that the man she used to love is gone.
The ghost story is beautifully tragic. The resolution, Grace's forgiveness and the departure of the ghosts, is such a heart-warming relief. And Buffy sorting out her feelings is wonderfully bittersweet.
Giles being distraught by the loss of Jenny, to the point of him not thinking straight, is heartbreaking. Metaphorically Giles is Buffy's mind, making it very fitting that Buffy's resolution is about sorting out her understanding of the Angel/Angelus distinction.
I noticed a thing: during the triangular binding spell we have Buffy at the center of the action, with Willow, Xander and Giles Cordelia supporting her, a motif replayed in Primeval (4x21).
If we understood the metaphor in Teacher's Pet (1x4) we learned that student-teacher romance means the teacher is preying on the student. Here it was... well preying is the wrong word, but here it was the student harming the teacher. I feel this might dilute the message of Teacher's Pet; this episode could've been a bit more on-brand with a line or two with the message that it's not uncommon or shameful for teens to have feelings for 20-somethings—but, if reciprocated, it's inappropriate for the older person to act on those feelings. The tie-in between James/Grace and Buffy/Angel would be perfect, the social commentary would be more to my liking, and I think the social commentary I want is on-point for BTVS. Heck, if you peel of the big S2 metaphor, I see a 16yo girl crushing on a ~26yo red flag, with disastrous consequences. The social commentary I'm calling for is the whole bloody point of S2, so why not reinforce it here? Maybe it would dilute the "awww" when Grace forgives James, like, we're meant to feel it's a sweet couple and they should get each other and that has to be an undiluted high note.
Nitpicking aside, what a gem!
Go Fish
I asked the writers for a good episode, but they said "go fish". Oh well, I guess there's plenty of fish in the sea. Let's plunge in and take a deep dive.
I remembered this as "that one really awfully disappointing episode of Buffy". This time, I found it to be merely "meh". There were a few decent comedy bits: "undercover" // "not under much" and "I'm dating a guy on the Sunnydale High swim team" // "you can die happy" #OohBurn look at the shallow Spordelia Cordelia.
There was a gender role reversal—on BTVS of all places—when Buffy walks Swimmer #2 home from The Bronze (for his protection) after he was attacked.
But on the whole... see, I kinda' enjoyed the early S2 MotW episodes, back when MotW was pretty much all that BTVS was. But now that I have tasted the Bangelus arc (again, this being a rewatch), I have lost my taste for MotWs—at least if they have no tie-in to the bigger picture. This is an episode I simply have no taste for, it doesn't excite me.
[I consider Phases (2x15) and BBB (2x16) MotW episodes with strong thematic tie-ins to the Bangelus arc: all the scoobies are dating monsters. And arguably, Passion (2x17) is about Jenny making risky dating choices, a follow-up on The Dark Age (2x8), making 2x14-2x17 a thematically cohesive run of episodes.]
Becoming
Fuck. Yeah.
Joss is such a scumbag. First he gives Buffy this great resolve and determination (perhaps after some feelings of resignation) in I Only Have Eyes for You, then he makes her waver a bit when she discovers Jenny's re-ensoulment spell. And then she gets Angel back, but it's too late since Angelus already pulled the pin on the doomsday vortex grenade, so she has to let go of him AGAIN! :(
Spike is chaotic and funny. You can always count on his loyalty, at least if you're the highest bidder, and Buffy effectively offered him his big ho girlfriend back. He's such a fool for love, wink-wink nudge-nudge.
I noticed a parallel between the trio of vampires and the trio of nerds: Angelus/Warren is the evil sociopathic leader of the group, Drusilla/Andrew has a crush on the leader and Spike/Jonathan betrays the group and sides with Buffy and the scoobies. [But also differences, of course: SpikeSilla are not as weak-willed as Andrew/Jonathan, for one. And the trio of vampires is charming.]
... and Xander brings Willow back by talking about their friendship and telling her he loves her!
Angelus talked about ascending—retro-echoing the mayor's plot in Graduation Day 2 (3x22).
Also: Angelus tried to pull a sword out of a stone (Acathla). We just went from gothic horror to Arthurian legend? Spike's reaction, "someone wasn't worthy", indicates that Angelus is a false king, not worthy of the throne of Sunnydale. He's not the real mayor so he won't ascend: while he eventually manages to pull the sword out of the stone, his ultimate fate is a downfall—he descends into a hell dimension.
The scoobies have a disagreement in the library about how to deal with Angel(us). I find it notable that it's Xander, Buffy's metaphorical heart, who responds to "I'll stop him" with "like you did last time, with Ms. Calendar"—Buffy is still feeling guilty about not having the heart guts to kill Angelus in Innocence. It's Xander who knows the location of Angelus' mansion, i.e. it's her heart which leads her to lost lover, and it's her heart which says "kick his ass". When he rescues Buffy's metaphorical mind, he (Giles) says "why would they make me see you", i.e. Buffy's mind doesn't want what's in her heart, they are conflicted. Buffy is driven by her feelings and passions now just as much as she was in Surprise when she unleashed Angelus. Once her metaphorical mind has been rescued it saves the day: she gives her regained love one last kiss and one last goodbye, then, letting cooler heads prevail, kicks his ass stabs him in the heart, breaking it, to save the day.
And some greatest hits: "nobody asks for their life to change, not really" ;; "what's left?" // "me" ;; "you hit me one time with an axe" ;; "have you tried not being the slayer?" ;; "you're expelled".
Becoming is peak Buffy.

Why didn't/couldn't Sidorovich, Barkeep and Sakharov recognize Strelok during SoC events?
This might seem like a plothole, but it actually isn't. Sid didn't know Strelok personally:
"Yeah, I've heard of a stalker by that name. Rumors is he's one of the few who went to the center of the Zone and made it back. Still, we got so many of these legendary stories about stalker heroes that I can't really guarantee anything. At any rate, I've never dealt with him personally. It seems he has his own trading channels. Anyhow, just ask the folks here in the Zone and you'll be sure to learn a lot more." Clear Sky confirms that his words are true, because during CS events it was Fang who had a business with Sidorovich and not Strelok.
Additional proof: https://snipboard.io/A4Pxgp.jpg https://snipboard.io/piHsac.jpg
Barkeep's dialogue:
"An experienced stalker as far as I know. He used to "work" through the northern exits from the Zone. He was hardly ever seen here but there are rumors that he took his group right into the center of the Zone."
Additional proof: https://snipboard.io/Y4EmM2.jpg
About Sakharov - There are plenty of possible explanations for the fact that he doesn't recognize Strelok, but the closest we have to an official explanation is included in the design document of the original storyline of the prequel, where it's said that Strelok's face was bandaged at the time:
"Strelok, whose face is still covered with bandages, comes to Sakharov and tells that he is planning a trip to the CNPP."
Of course, it's not really canon, but it still works.
Why won't military just bomb the Zone?
First of all, they already tried but failed:
"I can't really get into that - we've got some discipline in this place, after all. Our general Krylov certainly used to be a military man. I heard a few stories about how, just as the Zone formed, the government organized a military operation in here. They were sent to the very center of the Zone with an order to blow it all to hell with nuclear explosives. Can you imagine what that means? These guys were sent with no protection, no detectors, no information about what to expect in the Zone. Many perished in anomalies right off, and most of those who didn't were done in by an emission. The few survivors were left behind to die a slow death. General Krylov is one of those few. I don't know who he's pals with, but he hates the military ever since he and his buddies were sent straight to their deaths. He's got some connections in Spetsnaz though. Spetsnaz only got real men. Sometimes Duty crosses paths with them. That's pretty much it - consider it the abridged version." - Dialogue of Zvyagintsev
Additional proof: https://snipboard.io/HP1pVq.jpg
Second of all, it's obviously a very bad idea.
"Everyone who believes in the Monolith is completely nuts. They keep banging on about it but nobody actually knows what's in the center of the Zone. An invisible crystal that fell from the skies...ha-ha-ha! I reckon one of the secret labs blew up - I mean some stalkers used to work in a few of them. But, obviously, you can't bomb the Zone. Not only will the radiation spread all over the world, half of Europe would be flattened by the Zone's reaction. "Someone" has gone totally mad lately - I heard they're killing normal stalkers for no reason at all. How do you like that? Damn fanatics." - Dialogue of Random 100 Rads Bar Dutyer
Additional proof: https://snipboard.io/oWRgr0.jpg
Is the Zone growing?
Only SoC presents this idea. Neither Clear Sky nor Call of Pripyat mentioned anything about Zone's expansion. In fact, Hermann in CoP just said that Zone is evolving, while Loki directly said that it isn't getting bigger:
"They're idiots, that's what I think. I mean, why the hell would they want to destroy the Zone? it's not consuming precious resources or getting bigger... or anything. They could just sit there and study it to their heart's content - just think of how many scientific discoveries could be made... I mean, in the history of man-kind, no one has never been able to understand antigravitation, right? And in the Zone you've got ready-made antigravitation devices lying all over the place. It wouldn't hurt to kick their asses out of here, but it's too much hassle. By the way, don't be confused by our relations here at Yanov. We are at war... it's just that Yanov has been made neutral territory, if you know what I mean." - Loki
Additional proof: https://snipboard.io/UQ8ZEO.jpg
If The Zone is practically known globally then how come we aren't seeing other world governments trying to send people of their own to study it?
"Right... I seem to remember you asking me about something last night, though I can't recall... Ah, got it. You wanted to know why it's only our eggheads messing around in the Zone. Curious why the foreigners won't show up, even though there's enough stuff here for thousands of Nobles prizes... Alright, let's see. First of all, what the heck do they need coming down here for, when they can simply pay some of our guys and get the results on a silver plate? Second of all, they've actually been there themselves, and quite a lot of them, too. It's just that in the last two years these gringos have been badly scared of going into the Zone..." - Fragment from PDA entry called "The chronicles of egghead globalists"
"Ever heard about Station Thirty-Two? That's where they all bit the bullet. It was all quiet at first, pretty much normal... They'd be reading their meters, taking samples, poking their gear into anomalies... And then they all started going nuts. Every friggin one of them. Everyone slowly going off their rocker. One of ours, the one that retired eventually, told me about it... Some actually ripped their own throats open, other would smash their heads against the wall, and some would simply... Gun in their mouth and... And then the beasts started swarming all over them. Those few who were still sane enough barricaded themselves in the house. You get the picture, right? Dark night, all the local beasties outside, and people going nuts one after another inside. In short, in the morning those who still had it together broke out of there somehow. Went straight on, even got caught in some anomalies... Got to the Rotten Forest... But none of those who had been left behind have been found. they say loads of controllers were recorded in that area. that's how it was... Since then, no one goes anywhere near Station Thirty-Two, and the foreigners steer clear of the Zone... " - Another fragment from that entry
Additional proof: https://snipboard.io/ZEXgNy.jpg (Part 1) https://snipboard.io/gksjHB.jpg (Part 2) https://snipboard.io/Zc8W2G.jpg (Part 3.)
"There are always developments in the Zone, and they're always interesting. I already told you about Monolith - they're on everybody's tongue... Have you heard about a new major expedition into the Zone? Technically, they're environmental researchers from the UN, but that's just on paper. Sure, they got a couple four-eyed scientists, but just one look at all the others tells you they're seasoned fighters. No idea why they're here. Oh, and dig this: they're not using guides. Either they're being guided by satellite, or their mission is so secret that no one else could be let in on it. They seem to be approaching the Radar. I dunno how this will end, but I got a feeling it won't be pretty." - Dialogue of Hog
Additional proof: https://snipboard.io/oejv2a.jpg
What happened to Scar?
There can be many answers to this question. Scar's fate could have turned out in many ways - perhaps, if the brainwashing process failed, he became simply zombified; if it was successful, he could've died while being transported in the death truck; if this didn't happen, he had a clearly defined task to perform, and could die while trying to do it; if he survived, he might still be wandering around the Zone as an amnesiac.
It's also possible that he simply died during the emission, or was captured but somehow managed to overcome the brainwashing process and escaped from whatever laboratory it was taking place in.
Monolith's weaponry. How do they have so many guns?
It can be partially explained by a couple of things. First thing that should be noted is that Monolith before trilogy used to be different faction. It can be assumed that they already had decent weapons (I have another post which includes dialogues about older Monolith) https://www.reddit.com/stalkecomments/1ax5u7x/interesting_facts_about_the_monolith_faction/
Second thing is that even rookies know that they gotta get better equipment before going deeper into the Zone:
"For now I'm just gaining experience and saving up some coin. As soon as I have enough, I'll buy me a good shooter and armor, and head straight for the center of the Zone. Rumor has it some guys already made it there and found the Wish Granter. That's where I'm gonna go. And when I find it, I won't go wrong with my wish, you can bet on that!" - Dialogue of Cordon Loner in Clear Sky
Additional proof: https://snipboard.io/bqyuzA.jpg
And lastly, C-Consciousness Representative said "From the moment the Zone was formed, many people have tried to get to its center". Many people seem to think that Brain Scorcher only turns people into zombies, but it seems that it was also capable of converting them to Monolith:
"Brothers, as we were patrolling the outskirts of the Dark Forest we came upon an unfaithful loner. We did not kill him, seeing as he was already on his way to conversion, although he was still half-way in his animal state... Such is the wisdom of the Monolith: once again it revealed to us the true countenance of our enemies." - PDA entry called "A convert in the Black Forest"
Additional proof: https://snipboard.io/jC2MPJ.jpg
About their suits - there can be more than 1 answer.
It's interesting to point out that Monolith suit was located in lab X-18. Either the faction stashed them there, or they were here before. A possible explanation could be that such suits were used by guards of the secret facilities in the Zone before the 2nd disaster
I think this is important to point out too
"Stalker suit from the Monolith faction. The producer is unknown. Its protective properties are slightly worse then those of the PSZ-9a military bulletproof vest. Its structure is similar to the suit popular with neutral stalkers which combines a bulletproof vest and a radiation protection suit. It provides good protection from gunfire. Its level of anomaly protection is low due to the absence of an air" - Description of Monolith Suit
Additional proof: https://snipboard.io/XITJs4.jpg
"Stalker suit manufactured by "folk craftsmen". It is an effective combination of a light military bulletproof vest and of a rubberized fabric suit. It is reinforced with inserted kevlar plates and provides good protection from weak gunfire. All in all it is highly inefficient for carrying out deep raids and serious operations in the knots of the Zone." - Stalker Suit (Sunrise)
Additional proof: https://snipboard.io/zMGpqd.jpg
Lastly, Yantar loner NPCs in Clear Sky mention in their dialogue mention very interesting thing:
"I heard a whole faction went missing in the Zone. You ever heard of Monolith? Well, they used to protect the Zone from others, but they made a move towards the center right before the Emission. Nobody has heard from them since, but recently some real aggressive stalkers have been attacking from where the Scorcher is, killing everyone and asking no questions. I know because I saw them myself around the military warehouses, and I reckon they might be those same Monolithians who disappeared. It wouldn't surprise me, because their uniforms looked real similar." Other than a fact that Monolith faction of the trilogy had members from older Monolith who wore similar uniform, dead bodies of Monolithians in Clear Sky, that are scattered over the Zone very well could be the dead bodies of older Monolith faction

I’ve always hated the smell of gun oil. It clings to everything it touches, soaking deep into the fibers of my clothes, the lining of my backpack, the coarse hair on the back of my hands. Yet here I am, kneeling on the cracked linoleum of our mudroom, a Remington .308 laid across my thighs, and the stench of gun oil sharp in my nostrils. The early morning light barely scratches at the edges of the blinds, dim and gray like the belly of a dead fish.
My dad Frank is in the kitchen, clattering around with the coffeepot and mumbling under his breath. Today we’re heading up to the woods of Northern Michigan, same as we did every year before Leah… before we lost her.
I can’t help but feel the old scars throbbing as I load bullets into the magazine. It’s been ten years since that hunting trip, the one that tore my family into before and after. Before, when Leah's laughter was a constant soundtrack to our lives; after, when every silence was filled with her absence.
We were just kids back then. I was ten, Leah was eight. It was supposed to be a typical hunting trip, one of those bonding experiences Dad was always talking about. But things went wrong. We got separated from Dad somehow. One minute we were following him, the next we were lost, the dense woods closing in around us.
Dad says when he found me, I was huddled under a fallen tree, my eyes wide, my body frozen. All I could mutter through chattering teeth was "Dogman."
It was only later, after the search parties had combed through every thicket and hollow, that they found her. What remained of Leah was barely recognizable, the evidence of a brutal mauling undeniable. The authorities concluded it was likely a bear attack, but Dad... he never accepted that explanation. He had seen the tracks, too large and oddly shaped for any bear.
As I load another round, the memory flashes, unbidden and unwelcome. Large, hairy clawed hands reaching out towards us, impossibly big, grotesque in their form. Yet, the rest of the creature eludes me, a shadow just beyond the edge of my recall, leaving me with nothing but fragmented terrors and Leah’s haunting, echoing screams. My mind blocked most of it out, a self-defense mechanism, I guess.
For years after that day, sleep was a battleground. I'd wake up in strange places—kitchen floor, backyard, even at the edge of the nearby creek. My therapist said it was my mind's way of trying to resolve the unresolved, to wander back through the woods searching for Leah. But all I found in those sleepless nights was a deeper sense of loss.
It took time, a lot of therapy, and patience I didn't know I had, but the sleepwalking did eventually stop. I guess I started to find some semblance of peace.
I have mostly moved on with my life. The fragmentary memories of that day are still there, lurking in the corners of my mind, but they don’t dominate my thoughts like they used to. I just finished my sophomore year at Michigan State, majoring in Environmental Science.
As for Dad, the loss of Leah broke him. He became a shell of himself. It destroyed his marriage with Mom. He blamed himself for letting us out of his sight, for not protecting Leah. His life took on a single, consuming focus: finding the creature that killed her. He read every book, every article on cryptids and unexplained phenomena. He mapped sightings, connected dots across blurry photos and shaky testimonies of the Dogman.
But as the tenth anniversary of Leah’s death approaches, Dad's obsession has grown more intense. He’s started staying up late, poring over his maps and notes, muttering to himself about patterns and cycles. He’s convinced that the dogman reappears every ten years, and this is our window of opportunity to finally hunt it down.
I’m not nearly as convinced. The whole dogman thing seems like a coping mechanism, a way for Dad to channel his guilt and grief into something tangible, something he can fight against. But I decided to tag along on this trip, partly to keep an eye on him, partly because a small part of me hopes that maybe, just maybe, we’ll find some kind of closure out there in the woods.
I finish loading the rifle and set it aside, standing up to stretch my legs. I wipe my greasy hands on an old rag, trying to get rid of the smell. The early morning light is starting to seep into the room, casting long shadows across the floor.
Dad comes out of the kitchen with two thermoses of coffee in hand. His eyes are bleary and tired.
“You ready, Ryan?” he asks, handing me a thermos, his voice rough from too many sleepless nights.
“Yeah, I’m ready,” I reply, trying to sound more confident than I felt.
We load our gear into the truck, the weight of our supplies and weapons a physical reminder of the burden we carry. The drive from Lansing across the Lower Peninsula is long and quiet, the silence between us filled with unspoken memories and unresolved grief.
—
The drive north is a blur of highway lines and the dull hum of the engine. I drift off, the landscape outside blending into a haze. In my sleep, fragments of that day with Leah replay like scattered pieces of a puzzle. I see her smile, the way she tugged at my sleeve, eager to explore. The sunlight filters through the trees in sharp, jagged streaks.
Then, the memory shifts—darker, disjointed. Leah's voice echoes, a playful laugh turning into a scream that pierces the air. The crunch of leaves underfoot as something heavy moves through the underbrush. I see a shadow, large and looming, not quite fitting the shapes of any creature I know.
Then, something darker creeps into the dream, something I’ve never allowed myself to remember clearly.
Before I can see what it is I wake up with a start as the truck jerks slightly on a rough patch of road. Dad glances over. "Bad dream?" he asks. I nod, rubbing the sleep from my eyes, the remnants of the dream clinging to me like the cold.
"Yeah, just... thinking about Leah," I manage to say.
As we drive, Dad attempts to bridge the silence with small talk. He asks about my finals, my plans for the summer, anything to keep the conversation going. His voice carries a forced cheerfulness, but it’s clear his heart isn’t in it. I respond when necessary, my answers brief, my gaze fixed on the passing scenery.
The landscape changes as we head further north, from flat expanses to rolling hills dotted with dense patches of forest. It's beautiful country, the kind that reminds you how vast and wild Michigan can be, but today it just feels oppressive, like it’s closing in on us.
—
We finally arrive at the cabin, nestled deep in the woods, its weathered wood blending seamlessly with the surrounding trees. The place hasn't changed much since the last time I was here—a relic from another time, filled with the echoes of our past. I can still see Leah running around the porch, her laughter ringing out into the forest.
Dad parks the truck, and we step out into the crisp air. The smell of pine and damp earth fills my nostrils. We start unloading our gear, the tension between us palpable.
“Let’s get this inside,” Dad says, his voice gruff as he hefts a duffel bag onto his shoulder.
I nod, grabbing my own bag and following him to the cabin. Inside, it’s a mix of old and new—the same rustic furniture, but with new hunting gear and maps strewn across the table. Dad’s obsession is evident in every corner of the room, a constant reminder of why we’re here.
As we unpack, we exchange strained attempts at normalcy. He talks about the latest cryptid sightings he’s read about, his eyes lighting up with a fervor that both worries and saddens me.
“Did you hear about the sighting up near Alpena?” he asks, laying out his maps on the table.
“Yeah, you mentioned it,” I reply, trying to muster some enthusiasm. “Do you really think there’s something to it?”
Dad’s eyes meet mine, and for a moment, I see a flicker of doubt. But it’s quickly replaced by grim determination. “I have to believe it, Ryan. It’s the only thing that makes sense.”
We finish unpacking, the silence between us growing heavier with each passing minute. I step outside to clear my head, the cool air a welcome relief. The sun is starting to set, casting long shadows across the clearing. I can’t shake the feeling of unease.
"You can take the upstairs room," Dad mutters. His voice is strained, trying to sound normal, but it's clear the weight of the past is heavy on him. I nod, hauling my backpack up the creaking stairs to the small bedroom that I used to share with Leah. The room feels smaller now, or maybe I've just grown too much since those innocent days.
I unpack silently, setting my things aside. The bed is stiff and cold under my touch. As I settle in, I can't help but glance at the corner where Leah and I would huddle together, whispering secrets and making plans for adventures that would never happen. I push the thoughts away, focusing on the practicalities of unpacking.
After settling in, I go back downstairs to find Dad loading up a backpack with supplies for our hunt. The intensity in his eyes is palpable, his hands moving with practiced precision. I know this routine; it's one he's perfected over countless solo trips since that fateful day.
"We'll head out early," he says, not looking up from his task. "Gotta make the most of the daylight."
I nod, though unease curls in my stomach. I'm not just worried about what we might find—or not find—out there. I'm worried about him. Each year, the obsession seems to carve him out a bit more, leaving less of the Dad I knew.
—
The morning air is sharp with the scent of pine and wet earth as Dad and I head into the deeper parts of the forest. The terrain is rugged, familiar in its untamed beauty, but there’s a tension between us that makes the landscape feel alien. Dad moves with a purposeful stride, his eyes scanning the woods around us. Every snap of a twig, every rustle in the underbrush seems to draw his attention. He’s on edge, and it puts me on edge too.
As we walk, my mind drifts back to that day ten years ago. I can almost hear Leah’s voice echoing through the trees, her high-pitched call as she darted ahead, "Catch me, Ryan!" I remember how the sunlight filtered through the leaves, casting dancing shadows on the ground. Those memories are so vivid, so tangible, it feels like I could just turn a corner and see her there, waiting for us.
Dad suddenly stops and kneels, examining the ground. He points out a set of tracks that are too large for a deer, with an unusual gait pattern. "It’s been here, Ry. I’m telling you, it’s close," he whispers, a mixture of excitement and something darker in his voice. I nod, though I’m not sure what to believe. Part of me wants to dismiss it all as grief-fueled obsession, but another part, the part that heard Leah's scream and saw something monstrous in the woods that day, isn’t so sure.
As we continue, Dad's comments become increasingly cryptic. "You know, they say the dogman moves in cycles, drawn to certain places, certain times. Like it’s tied to the land itself," he muses, more to himself than to me. His fixation on the creature has always been intense, but now it borders on mania.
We set up a makeshift blind near a clearing where Dad insists the creature will pass. Hours drag by with little to see but the occasional bird or distant deer.
The sun rises higher in the sky, casting long, slender shadows through the dense canopy. I shift uncomfortably in my spot, the forest floor hard and unyielding beneath me. My eyes dart between the trees, hoping to catch a glimpse of something, anything, to break the monotony. Dad, on the other hand, remains steadfast, his gaze fixed on the treeline as if he can will the dogman into existence by sheer force of will.
A bird chirps nearby, startling me. I sigh and adjust my grip on the rifle. I glance over at Dad.
“Anything?” I ask, more out of boredom than genuine curiosity.
“Not yet,” he replies, his voice tight. “But it’s out there. I know it.”
I nod, even though I’m not sure I believe him. The forest seems too quiet, too still. Maybe we’re chasing ghosts.
As the sun begins its descent, the forest is bathed in a warm, golden light. The air cools, and a breeze rustles the leaves. I shiver, more from anticipation than the cold. The long hours of sitting and waiting are starting to wear on me.
“Let’s call it a day for now,” Dad says finally, his voice heavy with disappointment. “We’ll head back to the cabin, get some rest, and try again tomorrow.”
I stand and stretch, feeling the stiffness in my muscles. We pack up our gear in silence and start the trek back to the cabin. The walk is long and quiet, the only sounds are the crunch of leaves underfoot and the distant calls of birds settling in for the night.
—
Dinner is a quiet affair, both of us lost in our thoughts. I try to make small talk, asking Dad about his plans for tomorrow, but it feels forced. We clean up in silence.
After dinner, I retreat to the small bedroom. The fatigue from the day's hike has settled into my bones, but sleep still feels like a distant hope. I lie down, staring at the ceiling, the room cloaked in darkness save for the sliver of moonlight creeping through the window. Downstairs, I hear the faint sound of Dad moving around, likely unable to sleep himself.
I drift into sleep, but it's not restful. My dreams pull me back to that fateful day in the woods. Leah's voice is clear and vibrant, her laughter echoing through the trees. She looks just as she did then—bright-eyed and full of life, her blonde hair catching the sunlight as she runs ahead of me.
"Come on, Ry! You can't catch me!" she taunts, her voice playful and teasing.
I chase after her, but the scene shifts abruptly. The sky darkens, the woods around us growing dense and foreboding. Leah's laughter fades, replaced by a chilling silence. I see her ahead, standing still, her back to me.
"Leah?" I call out, my voice trembling. She turns slowly, her eyes wide and filled with fear. "Ryan, you have to remember," she says, her voice barely a whisper. "It wasn't what you think. You need to know the truth."
Leah’s words hang in the air, cryptic and unsettling. Before I can respond, she turns and starts running again, her figure becoming a blur among the trees. Panic rises in my chest as I sprint after her, my feet pounding against the forest floor.
“Leah, wait!” I shout, desperation lacing my voice. The forest around me seems to close in, the trees towering and twisted, shadows dancing menacingly in the dim light. I push forward, trying to keep her in sight, but she’s too fast, slipping away like a wisp of smoke.
Suddenly, there’s a rustle, a flash of movement in the corner of my vision. Leah screams, a sound that pierces through the heavy silence. It happens too quickly—I can’t see what it is, only a dark blur that snatches her up.
“Leah!” I scream, my voice breaking. I stumble, falling to my knees as the forest spins around me. My heart races, and the terror is so real, so visceral, that it pulls me back to that awful day, the one that changed everything.
I jolt awake, my breath coming in ragged gasps.
I sit up, wiping the cold sweat from my forehead as I try to steady my breathing. The room is still dark, the shadows cast by the moonlight seem to flicker and dance on the walls. My heart is still racing from the nightmare, the echo of Leah's scream lingering in my ears.
As I struggle to calm down, the floorboards outside my room creak. The door opens slowly, and I see the silhouette of my dad in the doorway, a Bowie knife in his hand, his posture tense.
“Dad, what the hell are you doing?” I whisper, my voice shaking.
“Shh,” he hisses, holding up a hand to silence me. “I heard something. Something moving around in the cabin. Stay quiet.”
I swallow hard, my mouth dry. I glance at the clock on the nightstand—it’s just past three in the morning. The cabin is silent, the kind of deep, oppressive silence that makes every small sound seem louder. I can’t hear anything out of the ordinary, but Dad’s expression is deadly serious.
He motions for me to get up, and I do, moving as quietly as I can. My heart is racing, a mix of lingering fear from the dream and the sudden, sharp anxiety of the present moment. Dad leads the way, stepping cautiously out of the bedroom and into the hallway, the knife held ready in front of him.
We move through the cabin, checking each room in turn. The living room is empty, the furniture casting long shadows in the dim moonlight. The kitchen is just as we left it, the plates from dinner still drying on the counter. Everything seems normal, untouched.
We finish our sweep of the cabin without finding anything amiss. The silence is heavy, punctuated only by our soft footfalls. I can see the tension in Dad’s frame, his grip on the knife unwavering. After checking the last room, we pause in the dimly lit hallway, the air thick with unspoken questions.
“There’s nothing here,” I say, my voice low. “Are you sure you heard something?”
He looks at me, his eyes searching for something in my face. “I heard growling. Deep and close. It was right outside the window.”
“Maybe it was just an animal outside, a raccoon or something?” I suggest, although the certainty in his voice makes me doubt my own reassurance.
“No, it wasn’t like that. It was different,” he insists, his voice tense.
I nod, not wanting to argue, but the seeds of worry are planted deep.
The look in his eyes sends a chill down my spine. It’s not just fear—it’s desperation. The kind of desperation that comes from years of chasing shadows and finding nothing. I can see the toll this hunt has taken on him, the way it’s worn him down, turned him into a man I barely recognize.
We head back to our rooms. As I lie down, my mind races with thoughts of my dad. I can’t help but wonder if he’s losing it, if the years of grief and guilt have finally pushed him over the edge.
Dad wasn’t always like this. Before Leah’s death, he was the kind of father who took us fishing, helped with homework, and told terrible jokes that made us groan and laugh at the same time. He was solid, dependable. But losing Leah changed him. The guilt twisted him into someone I barely recognize, someone driven by a need for answers, for closure, that may never come.
I try to sleep, but my thoughts keep me awake. I can hear Dad moving around downstairs, probably pacing or double-checking the locks. His paranoia has become a constant presence, and I don’t know how to help him. I don’t even know if I can help him.
—
The next morning, the sunlight filters weakly through the cabin windows, casting a pale light that does little to lift the heavy mood. I drag myself out of bed, feeling the exhaustion of another restless night. Dad is already up, hunched over his maps at the kitchen table, his eyes bloodshot from lack of sleep.
“Morning,” I mumble, rubbing the sleep from my eyes as I pour myself a cup of coffee. “Did you sleep at all?”
He shakes his head, not looking up from his notes. “Not much. I couldn’t stop thinking about what I heard last night.”
I sip my coffee, trying to shake off the remnants of my nightmare. “Maybe it was just an animal, Dad. We’re deep in the woods, after all.”
He finally looks up, his eyes intense. “Ryan, I know what I heard. It wasn’t just an animal. It was something else.”
I sigh, not wanting to argue. “Okay, fine, Dad. What’s the plan for today?”
“We’re going back out. I found some tracks yesterday, and I want to follow them. See where they lead.”
I nod, feeling a mix of apprehension and resignation. I can see how much this means to him, how desperate he is for any kind of lead. “Alright. Let’s get packed and head out.”
We spend the morning preparing, loading up our gear and double-checking our supplies. Dad is meticulous, going over everything with a fine-toothed comb. I try to match his focus, but my mind keeps drifting back to Leah and the dream I had. Her words echo in my head, cryptic and unsettling: “You need to know the truth.”
We set off into the woods, the air crisp and cool. The forest is alive with the sounds of birds and rustling leaves, but it all feels distant, like background noise to the tension between us. Dad leads the way, his eyes scanning the ground for any sign of the tracks he found yesterday.
As we walk, I can’t help but notice how erratically he’s acting. He mutters to himself, his eyes darting around as if expecting something to jump out at us. His grip on his rifle is tight, his knuckles white.
“Dad, are you okay?” I ask, trying to keep my voice steady.
He glances at me, his expression unreadable. “I’m fine. Just focused.”
He stops frequently to examine the ground or the bark of trees, pointing out marks and signs that seem meaningless to me.
“Look at this,” he says, crouching down to examine a broken branch. “See how it’s snapped? That’s not a deer or a bear. That’s something bigger. Stronger.”
I crouch next to Dad, squinting at the broken branch. To me, it just looks like a regular broken branch, the kind you see all over the forest. "I don't know, Dad. It just looks like a branch to me," I say, trying to keep my voice neutral.
Dad's eyes flicker with frustration. "You're not looking close enough. It's the way it's snapped—too clean, too deliberate. Something did this."
I nod, not wanting to argue. "Okay, sure. But even if you're right, it could be anything. A storm, another hunter..."
His expression hardens. "I know what I'm looking for. This is different."
I sigh, feeling the weight of the past and the tension between us pressing down on me. "Dad, I had a dream last night. About Leah." The words hang in the air between us, heavy and fraught with unspoken emotions.
Dad's eyes widen, and he straightens up, his entire demeanor shifting. "What kind of dream? What did you see?" His voice is urgent, almost desperate.
"It was... strange. We were in the woods, like we are now, but everything felt different. Leah was there, running ahead of me, laughing. Then she stopped and told me I needed to know the truth, that it wasn't what I thought."
Dad grabs my shoulders, his grip tight. "What else did she say? Did she tell you anything specific? Anything about the creature?"
I shake my head, feeling a chill run down my spine. "No, that was it. She just said I needed to know the truth, and then she was gone."
Dad’s grip on my shoulders tightens, and his eyes bore into mine with a mixture of desperation and hope. “Ryan, you have to try to remember. Think hard. What did the creature look like? Did you see anything else?”
I pull back slightly, uneasy with his intensity. “Dad, I told you. I don’t remember. It was just a dream. A nightmare, really. My mind’s probably just mixing things up.”
He lets go of me and runs a hand through his hair, looking frustrated and lost. “Dreams can be important. They can hold memories we’ve buried deep. Please, try to remember. This could be a sign, a clue.”
I rub my temples, feeling the beginnings of a headache. “I’ve tried, okay? I’ve tried for years to piece together what happened that day. But it’s all just fragments, like pieces of a puzzle that don’t fit. The dream… it felt real, but I don’t think it’s telling me anything new.”
Dad’s face falls, and he looks older than I’ve ever seen him. He turns away, staring into the forest as if it holds all the answers.
—
As we make our way back to the cabin, the sun begins to set, casting long shadows through the trees. The air grows colder, and I shiver, pulling my jacket tighter around me. Dad is silent, lost in his thoughts, his face drawn and haggard.
Back at the cabin, we unload our gear once again in silence. Dad disappears into his room, muttering something about going over his notes. I decide to explore the cabin, hoping to find something that might help me understand what’s going on with him.
In the attic, I find a box of old family photos and documents. As I sift through the contents, I come across a worn journal with Dad’s handwriting on the cover. Curiosity gets the better of me, and I open it, flipping through the pages.
The journal is filled with notes and sketches, detailing his obsession with the dogman. But there’s something else—entries that talk about Leah, about that day in the woods. His handwriting becomes more erratic, the words harder to read. One entry stands out, dated just a few days after Leah’s death:
“June 15, 2013 – It was supposed to be a normal trip. Keep them close, Frank, I kept telling myself. But I failed. Leah is gone, and it’s my fault. I heard her scream, saw the shadows. I tried to get to her, but… the thing, it was there. Too fast. Too strong. My hands… blood everywhere. No one will believe me. I can’t even believe myself. I have to find it. I have to protect Ryan. I have to make it right. God, what have I done?”
Before I can read further, the attic door creaks open, and Dad’s voice slices through the stillness.
“What are you doing up here?” His tone is sharp, almost panicked.
I turn to see him standing in the doorway, his face pale and his eyes wide with something between anger and fear. I clutch the journal to my chest, my mind racing. “I found this… I was just trying to understand…”
In an instant, he crosses the room and snatches the journal from my hands. His grip is tight, his knuckles white. “You had no right,” he growls, his voice trembling.
“Dad, I just wanted to know the truth!” I shout, frustration boiling over. “What really happened to Leah.”
His eyes flash with a mix of rage and anguish, and before I can react, he slaps me across the face. The force of it knocks me off balance, and I stumble backward, my cheek stinging.
For a moment, there’s a stunned silence. We both stand there, breathing hard, the air thick with tension.
“I’m sorry,” Dad says finally, his voice barely a whisper. “I didn’t mean to… I just…” He trails off, clutching the journal to his chest like a lifeline.
I touch my cheek, feeling the heat from the slap, and take a deep breath, trying to steady myself. “Dad, what aren’t you telling me? What really happened that day?”
“Stay out of it, Ryan,” Dad growls, his eyes dark with anger. “You don’t know what you’re messing with.”
He turns and storms out of the attic. I’m left standing there, my cheek throbbing, my mind racing. What the fuck is going on? What really happened to Leah? And what is Dad so afraid of?
—
That night, I sleep with my rifle within arm's reach, more afraid of my dad than any dogman. The slap still burns on my cheek, and the look in his eyes—rage, fear, something darker—haunts me. I lie awake, listening to the creaks and groans of the old cabin, every sound amplified in the stillness. Eventually, exhaustion pulls me under, and I fall into a restless sleep.
The dream returns, vivid and unsettling. I'm back in the woods, chasing after Leah. Her laughter echoes through the trees, a haunting reminder of happier times. This time, though, I push myself harder, refusing to let her slip away.
"Ryan, catch me!" she calls, her voice playful.
"I'm coming, Leah!" I shout, my legs pumping, my breath coming in ragged gasps.
The forest around us is a twisted, shadowy maze, the trees seeming to close in on us. Leah's figure becomes clearer, her blonde hair catching the dim light filtering through the canopy. She stops suddenly, turning to face me, her eyes wide with fear.
"Leah, what is it?" I ask, my voice trembling.
"Look behind you," she whispers, her voice barely audible.
I turn slowly, dread creeping up my spine. In the shadows, I see a figure, its form indistinct and shifting. It’s not quite animal, not quite human—something in between. The sight of it sends a jolt of terror through me, and I wake up with a start, my breath coming in ragged gasps.
I’m not in my bed. The ground beneath me is cold and hard, the smell of damp earth filling my nostrils. Panic rises as I realize I’ve sleepwalked into the woods. I scramble to my feet, my eyes adjusting to the dim light. The moon casts a pale glow over the surroundings, revealing what looks like a long-abandoned animal lair.
The walls are covered in giant claw marks, deep gouges in the wood and earth. The air is heavy with the scent of decay, and a chill runs through me. I can’t shake the feeling that I’m being watched.
Carefully, I start to move, my eyes scanning the ground, desperate for a familiar landmark. That's when I see them—faded scraps of fabric caught on the jagged edges of the underbrush. My steps falter, a sense of dread washing over me as I bend down to examine them. The fabric is torn, weathered by time and the elements, but unmistakably familiar. It's part of Leah's jacket—the bright pink one she wore on the day she disappeared.
As I strain to make sense of it all, a rustling sound behind me snaps my focus. My heart leaps into my throat. I spin around, my hand instinctively reaching for the rifle I don't have—because, of course, I didn't bring it in my unconscious state.
The shadowy figure that emerges from the trees is unsettlingly familiar, mirroring the menacing forms of my nightmares. But as it steps into the moonlight, I recognize the worn jacket, the weary posture. It's Dad.
"Ryan!" he calls out, his voice a mix of relief and stern concern. "I've been looking everywhere for you. What the hell are you doing out here?"
I exhale slowly, the terror ebbing away as reality sets back in. "I—I don't know, Dad. I must've sleepwalked again." My voice is shaky, my earlier dream still clinging to the edges of my consciousness.
Dad stares at me in disbelief. "You haven't sleepwalked since you were a kid, Ry. This... this isn't just a coincidence." His eyes dart around, taking in the surroundings—the eerie, claw-marked den, the unsettling quiet of the woods. "How did you even find this place?"
I shake my head, struggling to find an answer. "I don't know, Dad. I just... I woke up here." The uncertainty in my voice does nothing to ease the tension.
His eyes lock onto the tattered remains of Leah's jacket in my hands, and something inside him snaps. The color drains from his face as he stumbles a few steps backward. "This... this is where it happened," he murmurs, his voice barely a whisper. “This is where we found Leah."
“I thought you said you don’t remember anything from that night,” he says accusingly.
"I swear, Dad, I don't know anything about this place," I insist, my own heart pounding.
“It was you, wasn’t it? You’ve been hiding this from me.” His voice is frantic. “You... last night, the growling, it was you.” His voice rises, tinged with hysteria.
I step back, my pulse racing, feeling the chill of the night and the weight of his accusation. "Dad, I don't know what you're talking ab—”
"No!" he interrupts, his voice breaking as he points a trembling finger at me. "You knew, you always knew. It was you, Ryan. All these years, the evidence was right there, but I refused to see it. You were the dogman. You killed Leah!"
His words hit me like a physical blow, absurd and horrifying in their implications. "Dad, you're not making any sense. You're talking crazy! I was just a little kid! How could I–" I protest, my voice shaky.
He steps closer, his presence looming over me, the outline of his figure distorted by the shadows of the trees. "Think about it! It all makes sense now. You led us here, to this place, because you remember. Because you did it."
"Dad, stop it!" I shout, my heart pounding in my chest. "You're scaring me. You need help, professional help. This isn't you."
But he's beyond reason, his eyes wild with a haunted grief. "I have to end this," he mutters, more to himself than to me, his hand tightening around his rifle.
His finger hovers dangerously over the trigger of his rifle. My instincts kick in, and I know I have to act fast.
I lunge toward him, trying to knock the weapon away, but he's quicker than I expected. We struggle, our breaths heavy in the cold night air, the sounds of our scuffle the only noise in the otherwise silent woods. His strength surprises me, fueled by his frantic emotions. He shoves me back, and I stumble over a root, my balance lost for a crucial second. That's all he needs. He raises his rifle, his intentions clear in his wild, pained eyes.
I dive to the ground just as the shot rings out, a deafening blast that echoes ominously through the trees. The bullet whizzes past, narrowly missing me, embedding itself in the bark of an old pine. I scramble to my feet, my heart pounding in my ears, and I start running. The underbrush claws at my clothes and skin, but I push through, driven by a primal urge to survive.
"Dad, stop! It's me, Ryan!" I shout back as I dodge between the trees. Another shot breaks the silence, closer this time, sending splinters of wood flying from a nearby tree trunk. It's surreal, being hunted by my own father, a man tormented by grief and lost in his delusions.
I don't stop to look back. I can hear him crashing through the forest behind me, his heavy breaths and muttered curses carried on the wind. The terrain is rough, and I'm fueled by adrenaline, but exhaustion is setting in. I need a plan.
Ahead, I see a rocky outcrop and make a split-second decision to head for it. It offers a chance to hide, to catch my breath and maybe reason with him if he catches up. As I reach the rocks, I slip behind the largest one, my body pressed tight against the cold, damp surface. I hear his footsteps approaching, slow and cautious now.
As I press against the rock, trying to calm my racing heart, I can hear Dad's footsteps drawing closer, each step crunching ominously on the forest floor. He's methodical, deliberate, like a hunter stalking his prey.
“Come out, Ryan!” Dad’s voice is ragged, filled with a blend of fury and pain.
My heart pounds against my chest, the cold sweat on my back making me shiver against the rough surface of the rock. I know I can't just sit here; it's only a matter of time before he finds me.
Taking a deep breath, I peek around the edge of the rock, trying to gauge his position. I see him, rifle raised, scanning the area slowly. This might be my only chance to end this madness without further violence. I need to disarm him, to talk some sense into him if I can.
As quietly as I can, I move out from behind the rock, my steps careful to avoid any twigs or leaves that might betray my position. I'm almost upon him when a branch snaps under my foot—a sound so trivial yet so alarmingly loud in the quiet of the woods.
Dad whirls around, looking completely unhinged. "Ryan!" he exclaims, his rifle swinging in my direction. Panic overtakes me, and I lunge forward, my hands reaching for the gun.
We struggle, the rifle between us, our breaths heavy and erratic. "Dad, please, stop!" I plead, trying to wrestle the gun away. But he's strong, stronger than I expected.
In the chaos, the rifle goes off. The sound is deafening, a sharp echo that seems to reverberate off every tree around us. Pain explodes in my abdomen, sharp and burning, like nothing I've ever felt before. I stagger back, my hands instinctively going to the wound. The warmth of my own blood coats my fingers, stark and terrifying.
Dad drops the rifle, his eyes wide with horror. "Oh my God! What have I done?" he gasps, rushing to my side as I collapse onto the forest floor.
As the pain sears through me, a strange, overpowering energy surges within. It's wild, primal, unlike anything I've ever experienced. Looking down in horror, my hands are no longer hands but large, hairy, clawed appendages. The transformation is rapid, consuming—my vision blurs, senses heighten, and a raw, guttural growl builds in my throat.
In that moment, a flood of understanding washes over me, mingling with the horror of realization. These are the hands of the creature from my nightmares, the creature whose face I can never fully recall because, as I now understand, it is me.
What happens next feels detached, as if I'm no longer in control of my own actions, watching from a distance as my body moves on its own. I turn towards my dad, his face a mask of terror. He stumbles back, his eyes wide with the dawning realization of what his son has become.
The forest around us seems to fall silent, holding its breath as the nightmarish scene unfolds. I can hear my own growls, guttural and deep, filling the air with a sound that's both foreign and intimately familiar. The pain in my abdomen fuels a dark, violent urge, an urge that's too strong to resist.
With a ferocity that feels both alien and intrinsic, I move towards him. My dad, paralyzed by fear and shock, doesn't run. Maybe he can't. Maybe he doesn't want to.
The encounter was brutal and swift, a blur of motion and violence. My dad barely puts up a struggle, as though resigned to his fate.
Not that there is anything he can do. The creature that I’ve become is too powerful, too consumed by the wild instincts surging through me. I tear him apart, limb from bloody limb, my hands—no, my claws—rending through fabric and flesh with disgusting ease.
The sound of my dad’s screams, of tearing fabric and flesh is drowned out by the animalistic growls that echo through the trees.
When it’s all over, the red mist that had clouded my vision begins to fade, and the fierce, uncontrollable rage that drove my actions subsides. I'm left standing, my breaths heavy and erratic, in the eerie stillness of the forest. The transformation reverses as quickly as it came on, and I find myself back in my human form. My clothes are ripped to shreds, hanging off my frame in tattered remnants. At my feet lies what’s left of my dad, his body torn and unrecognizable.
I glance down at my abdomen, expecting agony, but instead find my wound miraculously healed. No sign of the gunshot remains, just a faint scar where I expected a bloody mess.
Shock sets in, a numbing disbelief mixed with a gut-wrenching realization of what I've become and what I've done. My hands, now human again, tremble as I look at them, half-expecting to see the claws that had so effortlessly ripped through flesh and bone. But there's only blood, my father's blood against my skin.
I stand there for what feels like an eternity, trapped in a nightmare of my own making.
Eventually, the shock wears thin, and a cold practicality takes hold. I need to get out of here. I need to cover my tracks, to disappear. Because who would believe this? Who would understand that I didn't choose this, that I'm not a monster by choice?
With trembling hands, I do what’s necessary. I bury my dad in a shallow grave, the physical act of digging strangely grounding. I cover him with leaves and branches, a pitiful attempt to hide the brutality of his end. I take a moment, whispering apologies into the wind, knowing full well that nothing I say can change what happened.
I leave the forest behind, my mind a whirl of dark thoughts. As I walk, the first hints of dawn brush against the horizon, the sky bleeding a soft pink. It’s hauntingly beautiful.

What’s the Difference Between On-Page SEO and Off-Page SEO?

On-page SEO focuses on optimizing parts of your website that are within your control, while off-page SEO focuses on increasing the authority of your domain through content creation and earning backlinks from other websites. To further understand the difference between the two, you have to understand, at a basic level, how search engine algorithms work. Let’s break it down.
There are two main buckets that search engines (SEO) look at when evaluating your site compared to other sites on the web.

1. On-page SEO looks at what your site (or your page) is about
2. Off-page SEO looks at how authoritative and popular your site is

On-Page vs. Off-Page SEO: What’s the Difference?

Put simply, what you rank for is largely determined by on-page factors, while how high you rank in the search results is largely determined by off-page factors.

How Does Each Type of SEO Affect Your Rankings?

What is On-Page SEO?

On-page SEO (also known as “on-site” SEO) is the act of optimizing different parts of your website that affect your search engine rankings. Where your website appears in search engine results pages is determined by a number of ranking factors including site accessibility, page speed, optimized content, keywords, title tags, etc. On-page SEO is about optimizing the stuff that you have control over and can change on your own website.

On-page SEO checklist:

How do you make sure your on-page SEO tactics are up to snuff? Here is a helpful checklist for on-site optimizations that can help curate your strategy.

Title Tags

Put your targeted keywords in the title tag of each page on your site. There are many best practices that go into writing an effective title tag.

• Limit your title tags to 55-60 characters (including spaces)
• Push the keyword closer to the beginning of the title (ONLY if it sounds natural)
• Don’t stuff your keywords
• Include brand at the end of the title tag, separated by a pipe bar () Example: “Chicago SEO Digital Third Coast”

Headings (H1)

Headings are usually the largest words on the page, and for that reason, search engines give them a little more weight than your other page copy. It is a good idea to work your target keywords into the headings of each web page but make sure you accurately reflect your page’s great content.
Make sure your H1s limited to one per page, all other headers are H2 or H3

URL structure

Put keywords into your URLs if possible. However, do not go changing all of your current URLs just so they have keywords in them. You shouldn’t change old URLs unless you plan on redirecting your old ones to your new ones. Consult a professional before doing this.

• Label your directories and folders in a way that makes sense for users
• Don’t repeat keywords in your URL more than once. Keywords are helpful, but overdoing it effects user experience. Example: /best-socks-comparison-best-socks-best-socks?
• Keep URLs as short as possible

Alt text for images

Any content management system should allow you to add something called “alt text” to all images on your website. This text isn’t visible to the average visitor – alt text is in fact used by screen reader software to help blind internet users understand the content of your images. Search engines crawl images in a similar way, so inserting some relevant keywords while accurately describing the image will help search engines understand your page’s content.
Writing an alt attribute for each image keeps your website in compliance with WCAG (Web Content Accessibility Guidelines). Keep the following things in mind when writing alt text:

• Thoroughly describe the image in 8-10 words
• Include your targeted keyword where it sounds most natural
• Include, if relevant, a geo-locator (e.g., Chicago)

Fast-loading pages, or page load speed

Google wants to help its users find what they’re looking for as quickly as possible to provide the best user experience. Therefore, optimizing your pages to load faster helps your site rank higher in the search results.
Google has a tool called PageSpeed Insights that will analyze your site on both mobile and desktop. and then suggest tips to optimize page speed. There are also several quick fixes to eliminate whatever is bogging your site down and slowing your page load time. Key site speed factors to consider:

• Minimizing HTTP requests
• Making sure server response time is <200ms
• Setting browser caching to at least a week or longer
• Enabling Gzip compression
• Having image sizes under 100kb (.jpg, .png, .gif)
• Placing all CSS in an external style sheet
• Minifying all JS, CSS and HTML
• Prioritizing above the fold content loading

Mobile Friendliness

In recent years, Google has prioritized mobile page loading speed as a key ranking metric.
How do you know if your website is mobile-friendly? Unfortunately, Google recently dropped support for some free public tools that helped. However, you can now use Google Search Console to analyze this type of information. Specifically, the Core Web Vitals report can help you identify if your mobile pages are loading slower than they should be.

Page Content

The content on your pages needs to be useful to people. If they search for something too specific to find your page, they need to be able to find what they’re looking for. It needs to be easy to read and provide value to the end user. Google has various ways to measure if your content is useful.

• Aim for at least 500 words of copy. Although there is no exact formula for how many words a page should have, Google seems to prefer when a page has a lot of relevant and helpful content surrounding your topic.
• Copy must be unique to each page, not duplicated from other pages on your site, and should directly address your visitors’ search queries
• Push the keyword closer to the beginning of the title, but ONLY if it sounds natural

Internal Linking

Linking internally to other pages on your website is useful to visitors and it is also useful to search engines. Here’s an internal link to another blog post on our site that talks more about internal linking. Very meta.
When adding internal links, make sure to have relevant anchor text. Anchor text is the clickable text in a hyperlink (usually indicated by blue font color and underline). To optimize your anchor text, make sure the selected word or phrase is relevant to the page you’re linking to.
On-page SEO ensures that your site can be read by both potential customers and search engine robots. With good on-page SEO, search engines can easily index your web pages, understand what your site is about, and easily navigate the structure and content of your website, thus ranking your site accordingly. As a best practice, make sure your page content includes 1-3 relevant internal links.

Schema Markup

Adding structured data helps Google better understand the content of a page. Google also uses certain types of structured data to display “rich results” in SERPs such as a recipe with start ratings or step-by-step instructions with an image carousel. These rich results often appear at or near the top of SERPs and generally have higher click-through-rates than normal organic listings.
Google prefers structured data to use schema.org vocabulary, and recommends using JSON-LD format. They also provide a handy Rich Results Test tool to check your code. While there are a variety of ways to add structured data to your website (plugins, Google Tag Manager, etc.), it’s always best to get a professional involved if you’re not comfortable writing code.
Check out Google’s guide to structured data and rich results here.

Social Tags

Having your content shared on social tells Google that people find your content relevant, helpful and reputable. Not every page on your site is share-worthy, but you can optimize the pages that are with these tips:

• Make sure you have Open Graph tags and Twitter Cards installed
• Make it easy with “tweet this quote” links, or social share buttons for each post

Core Web Vitals

User experience is key to a website’s long-term success. In spring 2020, Google unveiled Core Web Vitals, a common set of signals that they deem “critical” to all users’ web experiences.
The purpose of these signals is to quantify the user experience with a website, from page visual stability and load time, to interactive experiences.

• Largest Contentful Paint (LCP) – measures perceived page loading speed and marks the point at which the majority of the page content has downloaded.
• First Input Delay – quantifies user experience of a user’s initial engagement with a page.
• Cumulative Layout Shift – quantifies the amount of layout shift on visible page content and measures visual stability of a page. It’s usually causes by images without dimensions, dynamically injected content, web fonts causing FOIT/FOUT, and other embeds added without dimensions.

To check your LCP score, access your Google PageSpeed Insights and make sure your page hits LCP within 2.5 seconds. To accomplish this, remove unnecessary third-party scripts that may be running, upgrading your web host, activating “lazy loading” so page elements load only as users scroll down the page, and remove any large page elements that may be slowing it down.
One of the simplest ways to optimize cumulative layout shift is to add height and width dimensions to each new site element. Also, avoid adding new content above existing content on a page (unless responding to user interaction).

Page Experience

Google is working on a new ranking signal (likely to come out in 2024) that prioritizes websites with positive user experiences.
The ‘page experience signal’ will consist of Core Web Vitals, plus mobile-friendliness, safe-browsing, HTTPS security, and intrusive interstitial guidelines.
According to Google, “optimizing for these factors makes the web more delightful for users across all web browsers and surfaces, and helps sites evolve towards user expectations on mobile. We believe this will contribute to business success on the web as users grow more engaged and can transact with less friction.”

What is Off-Page SEO?

Off-page SEO focuses on increasing the authority of your domain through the act of getting links from other websites.
A good analogy for how authority works is this. If you have a bathtub with rubber duckies in it (the ducks are your pages), and you start filling the tub with water (links), your duckies are all going to rise to the top.
This is how a site like Wikipedia ranks for pretty much everything under the sun. It has so much water in its bathtub that if you throw another rubber duck in it, it’s going to float to the top without any other effort.
There’s a score called “Domain Authority” that calculates how authoritative your website is compared to other sites. You can type your domain name into here to see your score.

How to optimize for off-page SEO

There are several factors that influence your off-page SEO rankings. While each one is tackled with different strategies, they share an overarching goal of building the trust and reputation of your website from the outside.

1. Inbound links
2. Social media marketing
3. Guest blogging and guest posting
4. Unlinked brand mentions
5. Influencer marketing

The biggest off-page SEO factor is the number and quality of backlinks to your website. Some examples of ways you can build links to your website are:

• Creating awesome content that people want to link to because it is valuable. For example, this super helpful blog post about how to improve about us pages. The post provides a ton of actionable recommendations. People tend to link to content that is useful. Creating an online tool for your industry is another powerful content type. Things like online calculators tend to get the most backlinks out of all content types because they help people accomplish a goal.
• Social media shares of your content that ultimately generate links.
• Outreach e-mails to influencers in your industry that ultimately link to you.
• Guest blogging on sites related to yours. These guest posts will have links back to your site.

While link quantity is still important, content creators and SEO professionals are realizing that link quality is now more important than link quantity. As such, creating shareable content is the first step to earning valuable links and improving your off-page SEO.
How many links do you need for good off-page SEO? That is a tough question and it’s going to be based on the domain authority of your competitors, as you want to make sure you’re playing in the same sandbox.
SEOs also used to believe that buying links was a valid way of link building; however, Google will now penalize you for buying links in an attempt to manipulate page rank. You can also be penalized for submitting your links to link directories whose sole purpose is to increase your domain authority. Again, quality wins out over quantity when it comes to link building.

Is On-Page or Off-Page SEO More Important?

It’s not about choosing between on and off-page SEO, that would be like having to choose between a foundation or a roof for your house. On-page and off-page SEO work together to improve your search engine rankings in a complementary fashion.
However, SEOs generally advise getting your on-page SEO ducks in a row before focusing too much on off-page SEO.
Just like building a house, you want to set the foundation first before building the rest of the house. Like a foundation, you may need to come back and do some maintenance to your on-page SEO from time to time. Balancing the two will help make your website “bilingual” so that your users can understand it as well as the search engine robots- and that’s how your rankings start to improve.

SEO #onpageseo #Offpageseo #Corewebvitals

I had previously performed a firmware update, and doing so borked Fluid. So I went and did a factory reset on my K1 Max. After rebooting and recalibrating, it said there was another firmware update available. So I downloaded that, re calibrated the printer, re enabled root/ssh, and proceeded to use the helper script to go through and install what I had before. Everything went fine until I got to OctoEverywhere. This is not the first time I've had issues getting it to install. I tried using the helper script as well as downloading the install manually. Tried deleting all files in the OctoEverywhere folder and tried again, no matter what I get some weird message " Could not build wheels for pillow, which is required to install pyproject.toml-based projects"
This is an error I've never seen before.
Below is what I HOPE is the output that may shine some light on what is going wrong. This is a fresh reset machine, up to date firmware, so I don't understand the problem.
​
Running in K1 and K1 Max OS mode
Checking required system packages are installed...
Downloading http://bin.entware.net/mipselsf-k3.4/Packages.gz
Updated list of available packages in /opt/vaopkg-lists/entware
Package python3 (3.11.7-1) installed in root is up to date.
Package python3-pip (23.3.1-1) installed in root is up to date.
WARNING: Running pip as the 'root' user can result in broken permissions and con flicting behaviour with the system package manager. It is recommended to use a v irtual environment instead: https://pip.pypa.io/warnings/venv
System package install complete.
Checking Python Virtual Environment For OctoEverywhere...
No virtual environment found, creating one now.
created virtual environment CPython3.11.7.final.0-32 in 4380ms
creator CPython3Posix(dest=/usdata/octoeverywhere-env, clear=False, no_vcs_i gnore=False, global=True)
seeder FromAppData(download=False, pip=bundle, setuptools=bundle, wheel=bundle , via=copy, app_data_dir=/usdata/.local/share/virtualenv)
added seed packages: pip==24.0, setuptools==69.5.1, wheel==0.43.0
activators BashActivator,CShellActivator,FishActivator,NushellActivator,PowerS hellActivator,PythonActivator
Updating PIP if needed... (this can take a few seconds or so)
Requirement already satisfied: pip in /usdata/octoeverywhere-env/lib/python3.11/site-packages (24.0)
Installing or updating required python libs...
error: subprocess-exited-with-error
​
× Building wheel for pillow (pyproject.toml) did not run successfully.
│ exit code: 1
╰─> [216 lines of output]
running bdist_wheel
running build
running build_py
creating build
creating build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311
creating build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/ImImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/GifImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/_version.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/BmpImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/ImageCms.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/PcfFontFile.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/ImageColor.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/PaletteFile.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/ImageEnhance.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/features.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/__main__.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/_typing.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/PcxImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/ContainerIO.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/TarIO.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/DcxImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/ImageDraw.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/IcnsImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/ImageTk.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/PyAccess.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/__init__.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/GimpGradientFile.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/TiffImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/PdfParser.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/FpxImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/_binary.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/PngImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/ImageGrab.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/MicImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/XbmImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/CurImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/ImageWin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/MspImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/PSDraw.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/GdImageFile.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/DdsImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/QoiImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/BufrStubImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/EpsImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/WalImageFile.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/IptcImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/FitsImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/ImageFile.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/PsdImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/TgaImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/ImagePath.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/WmfImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/ExifTags.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/McIdasImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/JpegImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/XpmImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/ImageMath.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/FontFile.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/SgiImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/WebPImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/_deprecate.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/ImagePalette.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/ImageFilter.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/ImageFont.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/TiffTags.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/Jpeg2KImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/PixarImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/SpiderImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/ImageMorph.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/ImageShow.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/SunImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/GimpPaletteFile.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/_tkinter_finder.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/ImtImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/ImageSequence.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/GribStubImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/MpoImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/FliImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/_util.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/PdfImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/JpegPresets.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/GbrImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/ImageStat.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/MpegImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/Hdf5StubImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/PalmImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/ImageQt.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/report.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/ImageOps.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/ImageChops.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/FtexImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/PcdImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/ImageDraw2.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/BlpImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/Image.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/ImageTransform.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/XVThumbImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/PpmImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/ImageMode.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/BdfFontFile.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/IcoImagePlugin.py -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
running egg_info
writing src/pillow.egg-info/PKG-INFO
writing dependency_links to src/pillow.egg-info/dependency_links.txt
writing requirements to src/pillow.egg-info/requires.txt
writing top-level names to src/pillow.egg-info/top_level.txt
reading manifest file 'src/pillow.egg-info/SOURCES.txt'
reading manifest template 'MANIFEST.in'
warning: no files found matching '*.c'
warning: no files found matching '*.h'
warning: no files found matching '*.sh'
warning: no files found matching '*.txt'
warning: no files found matching '.flake8'
warning: no previously-included files found matching '.appveyor.yml'
warning: no previously-included files found matching '.clang-format'
warning: no previously-included files found matching '.coveragerc'
warning: no previously-included files found matching '.editorconfig'
warning: no previously-included files found matching '.readthedocs.yml'
warning: no previously-included files found matching 'codecov.yml'
warning: no previously-included files found matching 'renovate.json'
warning: no previously-included files matching '.git*' found anywhere in distribution
warning: no previously-included files matching '*.so' found anywhere in distribution
no previously-included directories found matching '.ci'
no previously-included directories found matching 'wheels'
adding license file 'LICENSE'
writing manifest file 'src/pillow.egg-info/SOURCES.txt'
copying src/PIL/_imaging.pyi -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/_imagingcms.pyi -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/_imagingft.pyi -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/_imagingmath.pyi -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/_imagingmorph.pyi -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/_webp.pyi -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
copying src/PIL/py.typed -> build/lib.linux-mips-cpython-311/PIL
running build_ext
​
​
The headers or library files could not be found for zlib,
a required dependency when compiling Pillow from source.
​
Please see the install instructions at:
https://pillow.readthedocs.io/en/latest/installation.html
​
Traceback (most recent call last):
File "", line 1009, in
File "/usdata/opt/tmp/pip-build-env-2zqzr5ol/overlay/lib/python3.11/site-packages/setuptools/__init__.py", line 104, in setup
return distutils.core.setup(**attrs)
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
File "/usdata/opt/tmp/pip-build-env-2zqzr5ol/overlay/lib/python3.11/site-packages/setuptools/_distutils/core.py", line 184, in setup
return run_commands(dist)
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
File "/usdata/opt/tmp/pip-build-env-2zqzr5ol/overlay/lib/python3.11/site-packages/setuptools/_distutils/core.py", line 200, in run_commands
dist.run_commands()
File "/usdata/opt/tmp/pip-build-env-2zqzr5ol/overlay/lib/python3.11/site-packages/setuptools/_distutils/dist.py", line 969, in run_commands
self.run_command(cmd)
File "/usdata/opt/tmp/pip-build-env-2zqzr5ol/overlay/lib/python3.11/site-packages/setuptools/dist.py", line 967, in run_command
super().run_command(command)
File "/usdata/opt/tmp/pip-build-env-2zqzr5ol/overlay/lib/python3.11/site-packages/setuptools/_distutils/dist.py", line 988, in run_command
cmd_obj.run()
File "/usdata/opt/tmp/pip-build-env-2zqzr5ol/normal/lib/python3.11/site-packages/wheel/bdist_wheel.py", line 368, in run
self.run_command("build")
File "/usdata/opt/tmp/pip-build-env-2zqzr5ol/overlay/lib/python3.11/site-packages/setuptools/_distutils/cmd.py", line 316, in run_command
self.distribution.run_command(command)
File "/usdata/opt/tmp/pip-build-env-2zqzr5ol/overlay/lib/python3.11/site-packages/setuptools/dist.py", line 967, in run_command
super().run_command(command)
File "/usdata/opt/tmp/pip-build-env-2zqzr5ol/overlay/lib/python3.11/site-packages/setuptools/_distutils/dist.py", line 988, in run_command
cmd_obj.run()
File "/usdata/opt/tmp/pip-build-env-2zqzr5ol/overlay/lib/python3.11/site-packages/setuptools/_distutils/command/build.py", line 132, in run
self.run_command(cmd_name)
File "/usdata/opt/tmp/pip-build-env-2zqzr5ol/overlay/lib/python3.11/site-packages/setuptools/_distutils/cmd.py", line 316, in run_command
self.distribution.run_command(command)
File "/usdata/opt/tmp/pip-build-env-2zqzr5ol/overlay/lib/python3.11/site-packages/setuptools/dist.py", line 967, in run_command
super().run_command(command)
File "/usdata/opt/tmp/pip-build-env-2zqzr5ol/overlay/lib/python3.11/site-packages/setuptools/_distutils/dist.py", line 988, in run_command
cmd_obj.run()
File "/usdata/opt/tmp/pip-build-env-2zqzr5ol/overlay/lib/python3.11/site-packages/setuptools/command/build_ext.py", line 91, in run
_build_ext.run(self)
File "/usdata/opt/tmp/pip-build-env-2zqzr5ol/overlay/lib/python3.11/site-packages/setuptools/_distutils/command/build_ext.py", line 359, in run
self.build_extensions()
File "", line 826, in build_extensions
RequiredDependencyException: zlib
​
During handling of the above exception, another exception occurred:
​
Traceback (most recent call last):
File "/usdata/octoeverywhere-env/lib/python3.11/site-packages/pip/_vendopyproject_hooks/_in_process/_in_process.py", line 353, in
main()
File "/usdata/octoeverywhere-env/lib/python3.11/site-packages/pip/_vendopyproject_hooks/_in_process/_in_process.py", line 335, in main
json_out['return_val'] = hook(**hook_input['kwargs'])
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
File "/usdata/octoeverywhere-env/lib/python3.11/site-packages/pip/_vendopyproject_hooks/_in_process/_in_process.py", line 251, in build_wheel
return _build_backend().build_wheel(wheel_directory, config_settings,
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
File "/usdata/opt/tmp/pip-install-93ffv0sl/pillow_dcffede559724c7d9c0af468515912d6/_custom_build/backend.py", line 26, in build_wheel
return super().build_wheel(wheel_directory, config_settings, metadata_directory)
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
File "/usdata/opt/tmp/pip-build-env-2zqzr5ol/overlay/lib/python3.11/site-packages/setuptools/build_meta.py", line 410, in build_wheel
return self._build_with_temp_dir(
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
File "/usdata/opt/tmp/pip-build-env-2zqzr5ol/overlay/lib/python3.11/site-packages/setuptools/build_meta.py", line 395, in _build_with_temp_dir
self.run_setup()
File "/usdata/opt/tmp/pip-install-93ffv0sl/pillow_dcffede559724c7d9c0af468515912d6/_custom_build/backend.py", line 20, in run_setup
return super().run_setup(setup_script)
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
File "/usdata/opt/tmp/pip-build-env-2zqzr5ol/overlay/lib/python3.11/site-packages/setuptools/build_meta.py", line 311, in run_setup
exec(code, locals())
File "", line 1025, in
RequiredDependencyException:
​
The headers or library files could not be found for zlib,
a required dependency when compiling Pillow from source.
​
Please see the install instructions at:
https://pillow.readthedocs.io/en/latest/installation.html
​
​
root@K1Max-AABB /usdata/octoeverywhere [#]
root@K1Max-AABB /usdata/octoeverywhere [#] note: This error originates from a subprocess, and is likely not a problem with pip.
-sh: note:: not found
root@K1Max-AABB /usdata/octoeverywhere [#] ERROR: Failed building wheel for pillow
-sh: ERROR:: not found
root@K1Max-AABB /usdata/octoeverywhere [#] ERROR: Could not build wheels for pillow, which is required to install pyproject.toml-based projects
-sh: ERROR:: not found
root@K1Max-AABB /usdata/octoeverywhere [#] root@K1Max-AABB /usdata/octoeverywhere [#]

Everything in my inventory is up for trade. The most valuable items are listed here, the rest you can find in My Inventory

Feel free to Add Me or even better send a Trade Offer. Open for any suggestions: upgrades, downgrades / knives, gloves, skins / stickers, patterns, floats.

All Buyouts are listed in cash value.

KNIVES

★ Butterfly Knife Lore (Factory New), B/O: $7194.77

★ Butterfly Knife Autotronic (Minimal Wear), B/O: $2025.74

⎯

★ M9 Bayonet Ultraviolet (Field-Tested), B/O: $557.87

★ M9 Bayonet Stained (Well-Worn), B/O: $529.41

★ M9 Bayonet Boreal Forest (Field-Tested), B/O: $465.39

⎯

★ Talon Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $1295.27

★ Bayonet Tiger Tooth (Minimal Wear), B/O: $746.28

★ Karambit Bright Water (Field-Tested), B/O: $688.15

⎯

★ Flip Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $547.93

★ Flip Knife Autotronic (Minimal Wear), B/O: $476.69

★ Flip Knife Case Hardened (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $278.18

★ Flip Knife Black Laminate (Well-Worn), B/O: $258.83

★ Flip Knife Urban Masked (Field-Tested), B/O: $181.64

⎯

★ Stiletto Knife Marble Fade (Factory New), B/O: $686.04

★ Stiletto Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $665.41

★ Stiletto Knife, B/O: $601.39

★ Stiletto Knife Crimson Web (Field-Tested), B/O: $418.25

★ Stiletto Knife Night Stripe (Field-Tested), B/O: $227.80

★ Stiletto Knife Boreal Forest (Field-Tested), B/O: $194.96

★ Stiletto Knife Safari Mesh (Field-Tested), B/O: $192.79

⎯

★ Nomad Knife Crimson Web (Field-Tested), B/O: $518.11

★ Nomad Knife Scorched (Field-Tested), B/O: $169.78

★ Nomad Knife Forest DDPAT (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $166.88

★ StatTrak™ Nomad Knife Blue Steel (Field-Tested), B/O: $335.79

⎯

★ Skeleton Knife Stained (Well-Worn), B/O: $442.05

★ Skeleton Knife Urban Masked (Minimal Wear), B/O: $426.24

★ Skeleton Knife Boreal Forest (Field-Tested), B/O: $314.03

★ StatTrak™ Skeleton Knife Fade (Minimal Wear), B/O: $2361.28

★ StatTrak™ Skeleton Knife Urban Masked (Field-Tested), B/O: $376.53

⎯

★ Ursus Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $557.12

★ Ursus Knife, B/O: $471.42

★ Ursus Knife Blue Steel (Minimal Wear), B/O: $212.37

★ Ursus Knife Case Hardened (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $187.66

★ Ursus Knife Damascus Steel (Field-Tested), B/O: $178.18

★ Ursus Knife Ultraviolet (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $155.13

★ Ursus Knife Boreal Forest (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $124.26

⎯

★ Huntsman Knife Black Laminate (Minimal Wear), B/O: $204.83

★ Huntsman Knife Black Laminate (Field-Tested), B/O: $184.50

★ StatTrak™ Huntsman Knife Lore (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $224.11

⎯

★ Bowie Knife Gamma Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $2142.02

★ Bowie Knife, B/O: $230.44

★ Bowie Knife Damascus Steel (Factory New), B/O: $209.20

★ Bowie Knife Ultraviolet (Minimal Wear), B/O: $180.51

★ Bowie Knife Ultraviolet (Field-Tested), B/O: $131.03

⎯

★ Falchion Knife Night (Field-Tested), B/O: $132.54

★ Falchion Knife Urban Masked (Well-Worn), B/O: $112.81

★ Falchion Knife Scorched (Field-Tested), B/O: $108.81

★ Falchion Knife Forest DDPAT (Field-Tested), B/O: $107.82

★ Falchion Knife Safari Mesh (Field-Tested), B/O: $107.46

★ StatTrak™ Falchion Knife Ultraviolet (Field-Tested), B/O: $143.08

⎯

★ Paracord Knife Crimson Web (Minimal Wear), B/O: $486.48

★ Paracord Knife Blue Steel (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $163.12

⎯

★ Survival Knife Blue Steel (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $138.26

★ Survival Knife Night Stripe (Field-Tested), B/O: $131.03

⎯

★ Gut Knife Sapphire (Minimal Wear), B/O: $1127.79

★ Gut Knife Gamma Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $286.17

★ Gut Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $246.55

★ Gut Knife Marble Fade (Factory New), B/O: $240.77

★ Gut Knife, B/O: $210.49

★ Gut Knife Lore (Field-Tested), B/O: $194.22

★ Gut Knife Case Hardened (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $151.51

★ Gut Knife Blue Steel (Minimal Wear), B/O: $124.94

★ Gut Knife Rust Coat (Well-Worn), B/O: $118.99

★ Gut Knife Boreal Forest (Minimal Wear), B/O: $109.80

★ StatTrak™ Gut Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $237.96

⎯

★ Shadow Daggers Gamma Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $264.92

★ Shadow Daggers Marble Fade (Factory New), B/O: $253.03

★ Shadow Daggers Tiger Tooth (Factory New), B/O: $237.22

★ Shadow Daggers Crimson Web (Field-Tested), B/O: $153.40

★ Shadow Daggers Autotronic (Minimal Wear), B/O: $144.42

★ Shadow Daggers Blue Steel (Field-Tested), B/O: $105.20

★ StatTrak™ Shadow Daggers Damascus Steel (Minimal Wear), B/O: $150.46

⎯

★ Navaja Knife Fade (Factory New), B/O: $365.99

★ Navaja Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $228.93

★ Navaja Knife Marble Fade (Factory New), B/O: $227.43

★ Navaja Knife Slaughter (Factory New), B/O: $209.06

★ Navaja Knife, B/O: $203.16

★ Navaja Knife Case Hardened (Well-Worn), B/O: $132.57

★ Navaja Knife Damascus Steel (Factory New), B/O: $121.69

★ Navaja Knife Damascus Steel (Minimal Wear), B/O: $109.95

★ Navaja Knife Damascus Steel (Field-Tested), B/O: $100.41

★ StatTrak™ Navaja Knife Fade (Factory New), B/O: $369.01

★ StatTrak™ Navaja Knife Damascus Steel (Field-Tested), B/O: $109.95

GLOVES

★ Sport Gloves Amphibious (Minimal Wear), B/O: $2394.67

★ Sport Gloves Omega (Well-Worn), B/O: $572.33

★ Sport Gloves Bronze Morph (Minimal Wear), B/O: $338.88

★ Sport Gloves Big Game (Field-Tested), B/O: $323.66

⎯

★ Specialist Gloves Marble Fade (Minimal Wear), B/O: $1652.07

★ Specialist Gloves Tiger Strike (Field-Tested), B/O: $599.14

★ Specialist Gloves Crimson Web (Well-Worn), B/O: $231.57

★ Specialist Gloves Buckshot (Minimal Wear), B/O: $126.21

⎯

★ Moto Gloves POW! (Minimal Wear), B/O: $996.99

★ Moto Gloves POW! (Field-Tested), B/O: $383.31

★ Moto Gloves POW! (Well-Worn), B/O: $276.00

★ Moto Gloves Turtle (Field-Tested), B/O: $180.28

⎯

★ Hand Wraps CAUTION! (Minimal Wear), B/O: $502.29

★ Hand Wraps Giraffe (Minimal Wear), B/O: $180.73

★ Hand Wraps CAUTION! (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $178.32

⎯

★ Driver Gloves Queen Jaguar (Minimal Wear), B/O: $181.01

★ Driver Gloves Rezan the Red (Field-Tested), B/O: $101.66

⎯

★ Broken Fang Gloves Jade (Field-Tested), B/O: $127.88

★ Broken Fang Gloves Needle Point (Minimal Wear), B/O: $124.55

⎯

★ Bloodhound Gloves Guerrilla (Minimal Wear), B/O: $127.94

★ Hydra Gloves Case Hardened (Field-Tested), B/O: $102.55

WEAPONS

AK-47 X-Ray (Well-Worn), B/O: $478.95

AUG Hot Rod (Factory New), B/O: $425.83

StatTrak™ M4A1-S Hyper Beast (Factory New), B/O: $413.95

M4A4 Daybreak (Factory New), B/O: $309.51

StatTrak™ AK-47 Aquamarine Revenge (Factory New), B/O: $305.43

AK-47 Case Hardened (Well-Worn), B/O: $196.38

StatTrak™ M4A4 Temukau (Minimal Wear), B/O: $174.64

P90 Run and Hide (Field-Tested), B/O: $167.03

AWP Asiimov (Field-Tested), B/O: $153.33

Souvenir SSG 08 Death Strike (Minimal Wear), B/O: $140.00

M4A1-S Printstream (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $124.70

StatTrak™ M4A1-S Golden Coil (Field-Tested), B/O: $117.48

AWP Asiimov (Well-Worn), B/O: $115.97

StatTrak™ Desert Eagle Printstream (Minimal Wear), B/O: $112.96

StatTrak™ AK-47 Asiimov (Minimal Wear), B/O: $110.85

Souvenir M4A1-S Master Piece (Well-Worn), B/O: $102.42

AK-47 Bloodsport (Minimal Wear), B/O: $100.53

Trade Offer Link - Steam Profile Link - My Inventory

Knives - Bowie Knife, Butterfly Knife, Falchion Knife, Flip Knife, Gut Knife, Huntsman Knife, M9 Bayonet, Bayonet, Karambit, Shadow Daggers, Stiletto Knife, Ursus Knife, Navaja Knife, Talon Knife, Classic Knife, Paracord Knife, Survival Knife, Nomad Knife, Skeleton Knife, Patterns - Gamma Doppler, Doppler (Phase 1, Phase 2, Phase 3, Phase 4, Black Pearl, Sapphire, Ruby, Emerald), Crimson Web, Lore, Fade, Ultraviolet, Night, Marble Fade (Fire & Ice, Fake FI), Case Hardened (Blue Gem), Autotronic, Slaughter, Black Laminate, Tiger Tooth, Boreal Forest, Scorched, Blue Steel, Vanilla, Damascus Steel, Forest DDPAT, Urban Masked, Freehand, Stained, Bright Water, Safari Mesh, Rust Coat, Gloves - Bloodhound Gloves (Charred, Snakebite, Guerrilla, Bronzed), Driver Gloves (Snow Leopard, King Snake, Crimson Weave, Imperial Plaid, Black Tie, Lunar Weave, Diamondback, Rezan the Red, Overtake, Queen Jaguar, Convoy, Racing Green), Hand Wraps (Cobalt Skulls, CAUTION!, Overprint, Slaughter, Leather, Giraffe, Badlands, Spruce DDPAT, Arboreal, Constrictor, Desert Shamagh, Duct Tape), Moto Gloves (Spearmint, POW!, Cool Mint, Smoke Out, Finish Line, Polygon, Blood Pressure, Turtle, Boom!, Eclipse, 3rd Commando Company, Transport), Specialist Gloves (Crimson Kimono, Tiger Strike, Emerald Web, Field Agent, Marble Fade, Fade, Foundation, Lt. Commander, Crimson Web, Mogul, Forest DDPAT, Buckshot), Sport Gloves (Pandora's Box, Superconductor, Hedge Maze, Vice, Amphibious, Slingshot, Omega, Arid, Big Game, Nocts, Scarlet Shamagh, Bronze Morph), Hydra Gloves (Case Hardened, Emerald, Rattler, Mangrove), Broken Fang Gloves (Jade, Yellow-banded, Unhinged, Needle Point), Pistols - P2000 (Wicked Sick, Ocean Foam, Fire Element, Amber Fade, Corticera, Chainmail, Imperial Dragon, Obsidian, Scorpion, Handgun, Acid Etched), USP-S (Printstream, Kill Confirmed, Whiteout, Road Rash, Owergrowth, The Traitor, Neo-Noir, Dark Water, Orion, Blueprint, Stainless, Caiman, Serum, Monster Mashup, Royal Blue, Ancient Visions, Cortex, Orange Anolis, Ticket To Hell, Black Lotus, Cyrex, Check Engine, Guardian, Purple DDPAT, Torque, Blood Tiger, Flashback, Business Class, Pathfinder, Para Green), Lead Conduit, Glock-18 (Ramese's Reach, Umbral Rabbit, Fade, Candy Apple, Bullet Queen, Synth Leaf, Neo-Noir, Nuclear Garden, Dragon Tatto, Reactor, Pink DDPAT, Twilight Galaxy, Sand Dune, Groundwater, Blue Fissure, Snack Attack, Water Elemental, Brass, Wasteland Rebel, Vogue, Franklin, Royal Legion, Gamma Doppler, Weasel, Steel Disruption, Ironwork, Grinder, High Beam, Moonrise, Oxide Blaze, Bunsen Burner, Clear Polymer, Bunsen Burner, Night), P250 (Apep's Curse, Re.built, Nuclear Threat, Modern Hunter, Splash, Whiteout, Vino Primo, Mehndi, Asiimov, Visions, Undertow, Cartel, See Ya Later, Gunsmoke, Splash, Digital Architect, Muertos, Red Rock, Bengal Tiger, Crimson Kimono, Wingshot, Metallic DDPAT, Hive, Dark Filigree, Mint Kimono), Five-Seven (Neon Kimono, Berries And Cherries, Fall Hazard, Crimson Blossom, Hyper Beast, Nitro, Fairy Tale, Case Hardened, Copper Galaxy, Angry Mob, Monkey Business, Fowl Play, Anodized Gunmetal, Hot Shot, Retrobution, Boost Protocol), CZ75-Auto (Chalice, Crimson Web, Emerald Quartz, The Fuschia is Now, Nitro, Xiangliu, Yellow Jacket, Victoria, Poison Dart, Syndicate, Eco, Hexane, Pole, Tigris), Tec-9 (Mummy's Rot, Rebel, Terrace, Nuclear Threat, Hades, Rust Leaf, Decimator, Blast From, Orange Murano, Toxic, Fuel Injector, Remote Control, Bamboo Forest, Isaac, Avalanche, Brother, Re-Entry, Blue Titanium, Bamboozle), R8 Revolver (Banana Cannon, Fade, Blaze, Crimson Web, Liama Cannon, Crazy 8, Reboot, Canal Spray, Night, Amber Fade), Desert Eagle (Blaze, Hand Cannon, Fennec Fox, Sunset Storm, Emerald Jörmungandr, Pilot, Hypnotic, Golden Koi, Printstream, Cobalt Disruption, Code Red, Ocean Drive, Midnight Storm, Kumicho Dragon, Crimson Web, Heirloom, Night Heist, Mecha Industries, Night, Conspiracy, Trigger Discipline, Naga, Directive, Light Rail), Dual Berettas (Flora Carnivora, Duelist, Cobra Strike, Black Limba, Emerald, Hemoglobin, Twin Turbo, Marina, Melondrama, Pyre, Retribution, Briar, Dezastre, Royal Consorts, Urban Shock, Dualing Dragons, Panther, Balance), Rifles - Galil (Aqua Terrace, Winter Forest, Chatterbox, Sugar Rush, Pheonix Blacklight, CAUTION!, Orange DDPAT, Cerberus, Dusk Ruins, Eco, Chromatic Aberration, Stone Cold, Tuxedo, Sandstorm, Shattered, Urban Rubble, Rocket Pop, Kami, Crimson Tsunami, Connexion), SCAR-20 (Fragments, Brass, Cyrex, Palm, Splash Jam, Cardiac, Emerald, Crimson Web, Magna Carta, Stone Mosaico, Bloodsport, Enforcer), AWP (Black Nile, Duality, Gungnir, Dragon Lore, Prince, Medusa, Desert Hydra, Fade, Lightning Strike, Oni Taiji, Silk Tiger, Graphite, Chromatic Aberration, Asiimov, Snake Camo, Boom, Containment Breach, Wildfire, Redline, Electric Hive, Hyper Beast, Neo-Noir, Man-o'-war, Pink DDPAT, Corticera, Sun in Leo, Elite Build, Fever Dream, Atheris, Mortis, PAW, Exoskeleton, Worm God, POP AWP, Phobos, Acheron, Pit Viper, Capillary, Safari Mesh), AK-47 (Steel Delta, Head Shot, Wild Lotus, Gold Arabesque, X-Ray, Fire Serpent, Hydroponic, Panthera Onca, Case Hardened, Vulcan, Jet Set, Fuel Injector, Bloodsport, Nightwish, First Class, Neon Rider, Asiimov, Red Laminate, Aquamarine Revenge, The Empress, Wasteland Rebel, Jaguar, Black Laminate, Leet Museo, Neon Revolution, Redline, Frontside Misty, Predator, Legion of Anubis, Point Disarray, Orbit Mk01, Blue Laminate, Green Laminate, Emerald Pinstripe, Cartel, Phantom Disruptor, Jungle Spray, Safety Net, Rat Rod, Baroque Purple, Slate, Elite Build, Uncharted, Safari Mesh), FAMAS (Waters of Nephthys, Sundown, Prime Conspiracy, Afterimage, Commemoration, Dark Water, Spitfire, Pulse, Eye of Athena, Meltdown, Rapid Eye Move, Roll Cage, Styx, Mecha Industrie, Djinn, ZX Spectron, Valence, Neural Net, Night Borre, Hexne), M4A4 (Eye of Horus, Temukau, Howl, Poseidon, Asiimov, Daybreak, Hellfire, Zirka, Red DDPAT, Radiation Hazard, Modern Hunter, The Emperor, The Coalition, Bullet Rain, Cyber Security, X-Ray, Dark Blossom, Buzz Kill, In Living Color, Neo-Noir, Desolate Space, 龍王 (Dragon King), Royal Paladin, The Battlestar, Global Offensive, Tooth Fairy, Desert-Strike, Griffin, Evil Daimyo, Spider Lily, Converter), M4A1-S (Emphorosaur-S, Welcome to the Jungle, Imminent Danger, Knight, Hot Rod, Icarus Fell, Blue Phosphor, Printstream, Master Piece, Dark Water, Golden Coil, Bright Water, Player Two, Atomic Alloy, Guardian, Chantico's Fire, Hyper Beast, Mecha Industries, Cyrex, Control Panel, Moss Quartz, Nightmare, Decimator, Leaded Glass, Basilisk, Blood Tiger, Briefing, Night Terror, Nitro, VariCamo, Flashback), SG 553 (Cyberforce, Hazard Pay, Bulldozer, Integrale, Dragon Tech, Ultraviolet, Colony IV, Hypnotic, Cyrex, Candy Apple, Barricade, Pulse), SSG 08 (Death Strike, Sea Calico, Blood in the Water, Orange Filigree, Dragonfire, Big Iron, Bloodshot, Detour, Turbo Peek, Red Stone), AUG (Akihabara Accept, Flame Jörmungandr, Hot Rod, Midnight Lily, Sand Storm, Carved Jade, Wings, Anodized Navy, Death by Puppy, Torque, Bengal Tiger, Chameleon, Fleet Flock, Random Access, Momentum, Syd Mead, Stymphalian, Arctic Wolf, Aristocrat, Navy Murano), G3SG1 (Chronos, Violet Murano, Flux, Demeter, Orange Kimono, The Executioner, Green Apple, Arctic Polar Camo, Contractor), SMGs - P90 (ScaraB Rush, Neoqueen, Astral Jörmungandr, Run and Hide, Emerald Dragon, Cold Blooded, Death by Kitty, Baroque Red, Vent Rush, Blind Spot, Asiimov, Trigon, Sunset Lily, Death Grip, Leather, Nostalgia, Fallout Warning, Tiger Pit, Schermatic, Virus, Shapewood, Glacier Mesh, Shallow Grave, Chopper, Desert Warfare), MAC-10 (Sakkaku, Hot Snakes, Copper Borre, Red Filigree, Gold Brick, Graven, Case Hardened, Stalker, Amber Fade, Neon Rider, Tatter, Curse, Propaganda, Nuclear Garden, Disco Tech, Toybox, Heat, Indigo), UMP-45 (Wild Child, Fade, Blaze, Day Lily, Minotaur's Labyrinth, Crime Scene, Caramel, Bone Pile, Momentum, Primal Saber), MP7 (Teal Blossom, Fade, Nemesis, Whiteout, Asterion, Bloosport, Abyssal Apparition, Full Stop, Special Delivery, Neon Ply, Asterion, Ocean Foam, Powercore, Scorched, Impire), PP-Bizon (Modern Hunter, Rust Coat, Forest Leaves, Antique, High Roller, Blue Streak, Seabird, Judgement of Anubis, Bamboo Print, Embargo, Chemical Green, Coblat Halftone, Fuel Rod, Photic Zone, Irradiated Alert, Carbon Fiber), MP9 (Featherweight, Wild Lily, Pandora's Box, Stained Glass, Bulldozer, Dark Age, Hot Rod, Hypnotic, Hydra, Rose Iron, Music Box, Setting Sun, Food Chain, Airlock, Mount Fuji, Starlight Protector, Ruby Poison Dart, Deadly Poison), MP5-SD (Liquidation, Oxide Oasis, Phosphor, Nitro, Agent, Autumn Twilly), Shotguns, Machineguns - Sawed-Off (Kiss♥Love, First Class, Orange DDPAT, Rust Coat, The Kraken, Devourer, Mosaico, Wasteland Princess, Bamboo Shadow, Copper, Serenity, Limelight, Apocalypto), XM1014 (Frost Borre, Ancient Lore, Red Leather, Elegant Vines, Banana Leaf, Jungle, Urban Perforated, Grassland, Blaze Orange, Heaven Guard, VariCamo Blue, Entombed, XOXO, Seasons, Tranquility, Bone Machine, Incinegator, Teclu Burner, Black Tie, Zombie Offensive, Watchdog), Nova (Sobek's Bite, Baroque Orange, Hyper Beast, Green Apple, Antique, Modern Hunter, Walnut, Forest Leaves, Graphite, Blaze Orange, Rising Skull, Tempest, Bloomstick, Interlock, Quick Sand, Moon in Libra, Clean Polymer, Red Quartz, Toy Soldier), MAG-7 (Copper Coated, Insomnia, Cinqueda, Counter Terrace, Prism Terrace, Memento, Chainmail, Hazard, Justice, Bulldozer, Silver, Core Breach, Firestarter, Praetorian, Heat, Hard Water, Monster Call, BI83 Spectrum, SWAG-7), M249 (Humidor, Shipping Forecast, Blizzard Marbleized, Downtown, Jungle DDPAT, Nebula Crusader, Impact Drill, Emerald Poison Dart), Negev (Mjölnir, Anodized Navy, Palm, Power Loader, Bratatat, CaliCamo, Phoenix Stencil, Infrastructure, Boroque Sand), Wear - Factory New (FN), Minimal Wear (MW), Field-Tested (FT), Well-Worn (WW), Battle-Scarred (BS), Stickers Holo/Foil/Gold - Katowice 2014, Krakow 2017, Howling Dawn, Katowice 2015, Crown, London 2018, Cologne 2014, Boston 2018, Atlanta 2017, Cluj-Napoca 2015, DreamHack 2014, King on the Field, Harp of War, Winged Difuser, Cologne 2016, Cologne 2015, MLG Columbus 2016, Katowice 2019, Berlin 2019, RMR 2020, Stockholm 2021, Antwerp 2022, Paris 2023, Swag Foil, Flammable foil, Others - Souvenirs, Agents, Pins, Passes, Gifts, Music Kits, Cases, Keys, Capsules, Packages, Patches

Some items on the list may no longer be available or are still locked, visit My Inventory for more details.

Send a Trade Offer for fastest response. I consider all offers.

Add me for discuss if there is a serious offer that needs to be discussed.