Moms pregnant by sons

I feel jealous when my mother in law feeds and takes care of my husband. I feel uncomfortable when I am sitting right in front but he asks his mom to serve him or prepare tea for him etc. She is the one who puts his clothes to wash etc. My husband is currently unwell and on bed rest and needs someone else to do these things for him.
Even when I try doing it instead of her, she guides me or just tells me to do something which I already intend to do for him like my husband asked his mom to serve him food. But I went before her and started serving his plate. While I was serving items one by one, she says “Serve that curry also for him”. I said “of course I am going to serve everything , one by one”. She then goes ahead and brings that curry bowl to me to keep it in his plate. Now it takes away from my life the joy/fulfillment of being there for my husband, taking care of him. Now she made it feel like a chore she assigned me to do.
My husband thinks I am already overwhelmed by his condition and have a lot else personally going for me. So asks his mother with an intention to not burden me anymore. But it also makes me distant from him and makes his mother close to him.
I hear all the stereotypes about MILs who dont want to let their son go from their clutches. I am not sure if mine is the same. My gut feeling says she is like that.
I dont know if I am being an asshole for not letting a mother take care of her own son.

So I have a bit of a situation I am dealing with from afar, but I'm hoping I can get some information to pass along to relevant parties ...
I tried calling my birth mother (hereto referred to as "P") this Sunday to wish her a Happy Mother's Day (my adopted mom passed away last February). When I called, I discovered that her phone was disconnected.
In response, I immediately called the local PD for a welfare check. When they got back in touch with me, they said there was no answer at the door.
I then reached out to my birth half-brother's wife (hereto referred to as "T"). She also requested a welfare check. Somehow, "T" was able to get a bit more information than me, maybe because the officer was being a little more thorough in his investigation of things.
The police told "T" that when they looked in the window of the "P"'s house, it was "a hoarder's nightmare". I recall being in there once before and it was in bad shape even then; based on what I was told, there is nothing more than a path to walk through the house now. I was also told by "T" that my half-brother and "P" had a bit of a love/hate relationship for a while; "T" now serves as a mediator of sorts between them. I personally didn't have any issues with "P", but I had not spoken to her since she had been discharged from the hospital on the first of last year after she had a wreck.
One good thing about finding your birth parents is that you learn a lot about yourself; in the 18 years I have known her, I have learned a lot about who I am based on our past interactions.
"T" then told me the last time she spoke with "P", she was exhibiting early signs of dementia, as she would not remember who she was talking to even after she indicated who she was to her.After doing some further investigation with the assistance of one of my birth mom's friends, "T" was able to find out that "P"'s utilities had been disconnected at her house for some time and that she went to the hospital at the start of April (reason(s) unknown).
After doing a little more digging, "T" discovered that "P" was released from the hospital (exactly date/time also unknown), but was transferred to an assisted care facility (location unknown). Fortunately, that means "P" is being cared for, but according to my "T", "P" had lost quite a bit of weight the last time they had interacted. Personally, the last time I saw her was the Christmas before my mom passed away and she looked fine at that time."T" will continue to investigate and offer me more information regarding "P"'s location and status when she can.
Here's where the "AIW" question comes in ...
"T" was listed as an emergency contact for "P". At this time, I do not know where or how this was documented, but that doesn't change the fact that that she was never contacted the last time "P" ended up in the hospital, nor when she was discharged. She has tried calling several assisted living facilities in the area, but all of them refuse to give her any information citing potential HIPPA violations. I believe that if she had been contacted, that "T" would have taken steps to make sure she was where she needed to be; she also would have been able to contact me and keep me in the loop regarding what was going on/where "P" was located. Now, we are all scrambling in an effort to locate her and make certain that she is alive and well and being cared for properly.
My wife works in the medical field. We have one son who had a traumatic brain injury but passed away in July 2019. We also have another son who has ADHD and Autism. So, for all intents and purposes, we are well-versed in all aspects of HIPPA. Could "P"s onset of dementia be the reason why "T" wasn't contacted (didn't remember who her emergency contact was and it was not properly documented on her medical records when initially brought up) or did the hospital and, concurrently, the assisted living facility, simply drop the ball and not do their due diligence? What steps can we take in an effort to locate "P"?

this is a very random post and maybe nobody will be able to offer advice but I’m pregnant with baby #2 and due in the middle of winter. I have a 1 year old who is very mommy obsessed so I’ve been working hard to make him comfy in his own room and to wean from mommy milk so that he doesn’t give my parents any issues while we’re away for a couple nights. My mom just informed me this week that the family has a tradition of sleeping in the parking lot until baby is born. She was fully planning on having our 1 year old also sleeping in the car, in the parking lot, in the dead of winter, for my entire labodelivery…. Not sure how I feel about this but my instinct is saying no?? I’ve been preparing my son to be comfy without me at home and now this feels completely out of my control. Also my mom isn’t really the type that I can tell what to do, if I tell her that I don’t want my child sleeping in the parking lot it WILL cause a huge fight. I’m trying to decide which stressful situation I’d rather deal with while pregnant. Thanks for the help everyone.

I’m a ftm and I’m 25 weeks pregnant. I’ve been thinking about my birth plan and trying to prepare myself for post-partum. While I was talking to my husband about everything, we got on the topic of visitors at the hospital during and after delivery. We both agreed it would be too much stress to allow siblings and extended family to visit us, and I had mentioned I felt extremely uncomfortable with the idea of my in laws visiting too. He seemed a little upset by this but was still completely understanding, and I can’t help but feel bad. My parents will be there as my mom is going to be in the delivery room with me. I also plan on breast feeding and I’m just not comfortable with anyone else being there during such a vulnerable time.
Would I be unreasonable to ask my in laws to wait until after we’re home to visit? If I’m not feeling up to company I could be in my room while they visit with my husband and baby. We also just bought our older home and we’re in the process of redoing a lot of it, so I’m already nervous for visitors anyway, but I don’t want to keep my baby away from his grandparents. I’m just having a hard time with the idea of all of it.
What would you all do?

Me (26M) and gf (26F) has been together for 4 years and some months now.We’ve been going through a rough patch because of this message that I’ll be pasting below.
A few times and both times on our anniversary you would’ve said that you would like to carry your mom out to the same place because she’d like it. I find it very unnatural and a bit uncomfortable that you taking an experience we had and transforming it into another experience that you either wish you had or that you want to have. You’ve done that on our both anniversaries or any other experience that we had really and I don’t really like the comparing thing it makes me feel like our experience was insignificant.
Also the thing with the pta meeting. That whole situation is unnatural to me. Ik that you are a good son and big brother but that whole acting like “them children” father is a bit too much. Ik you care and love them and I admire that really but you act like your only happiness comes from “fathering” them. It’s your mother’s responsibility and all you could do is help but the way you act as though you are their father. You also act like you trying to prove something and idk why you feel like that.
If you wondering why it feels unnatural to me it’s because when we had pregnancies scares or even when I talk about how everybody pregnant. You have such a bad reaction like that would be the worst situation. But you so happy to put your whole mental and financials on the line for them and if it’s me that would be so bad. Ik we not there yet it’s not about making no baby now it’s about your reaction and everything that comes after it.
I have 3 younger sisters ages 18,11,and 6 the younger 2 being from a different father that lives abroad and not really in their lives so I’m there for them physically and financially (rarely). I see them maybe once a week while I see my gf almost everyday. My mom doesn’t have stable work so I help when I can but I don’t live with them.
TL;DR; : She says that I don’t show her the support I show my family is the reason for sending that message. Which I don’t understand when I see her 90% of my free time and rarely spend quality time with them. It’s been a few months since that message and I’ve just felt mentally tired of her since. I’m honestly not happy right now and I can’t let go of it, what should I do?

When I was a junior in high school (I'm talking 2014) I borrowed a book from my friend's mom. It was the only book I ever read by Dean Koontz and I can't figure out which one this one is. It is the book about the creature in a small Californian town that is killing people and leaving their bodies a husks. As the creature is killing the person, the person who is dying is experiencing the most incredible orgasm of their life apparently. The book follows multiple characters, a mom who's son died from the creature, some woman from the government looking into the deaths, and some guy who I only remember as being social awkward and weird. The book was very sexual and the mom and the weird guy end up hooking up and doing like some weird trauma reenactment thing because the mom was assaulted as a child (???) . I remember it ends with the creature being some unknown underwater species that has evolved to travel on land and I think they kill it. If anyone knows what this book is, I wanted to reread it to see if my memory is indeed correct on it's craziness.

My Fiancé and I have been together since freshman year. We’re now 21, we’ve had 3 kids together. It has been a long 6 years of back and forth with his mom. She doesn’t make it blatantly obvious so she still seems “so nice” but has constantly shown with little remarks and actions that there’s harsh feelings deep inside. I’m very non confrontational and don’t know how to go about saying something. But it’s gotten to the point where it consumes me constantly and I need to do something about it. There’s so many different things I wouldn’t know where to start but I’ll list a few. When we had my first son we were young and still in high school. When we had my first sons baby shower she tried to have her friends have a baby shower for her so she could have her own things for my son. Maybe it wasn’t meant any way because we were young, but it was definitely odd and uncomfortable for me. As of recent she constantly says how she immensely misses alone time with my Fiancé and it’s weird because her focus always just seems to be him and not our kids. She never sees the kids besides stopping by or us going over there. She doesn’t seem to care at all about having time with them only with him. But when we do go over she has her phone in my kids face constantly and makes Facebook posts. She has opened our mail multiple times and is very nosey into our personal information. Every time we go over to her house or she comes over she constantly asks about our personal business and yells at him and treats him like a 10 year old. It’s very uncomfortable and it’s like she sees no wrong in it. She gets mad like a child throwing a fit. Telling him what he needs and doesn’t need to do. She also is always calling him by his Dads name and her and his dad haven’t been together for like 12 years. All in all there are so many things every single time we have interaction with her. She constantly is throwing low blows. I’ve talked to my fiancé and I just don’t know how to handle it but I’m at a breaking point where I need to say something but being the person I am I just want to go about it in the most mature way possible because I will send myself into a panic attack confronting people.

My(21TF) dad(51M) told me about 6 months ago when I came out that he supports me, and that he'll always love me and I always be his "son". First ick right there. Fast forward 6 months. He finds out that I had started HRT, goes to my mom(who is highly supportive) and states that he's worried about me and my mental health, and wants her to keep an eye on me just in case. Mom says she's not worried, but ok. Then relays everything to me. I then confront dad and ask him to state what worries him, he then goes to quote finding from the Cass Article.( I pointed out that it was a flawed article.) He then asked me to consider stopping HRT till I was 25(eww no), then said he was worried about the opportunities I would miss out on, then stated his piece on how he doesn't want to be forced to use pronouns because freedom of speech. He said that the male brain isnt finished developing until around 25 and that i likely wont make reaponsible choices before that and that this is probably one of them. Then he ended the conversation by saying he'll always support me no matter what my choice is, as if he just glossed over the litany of transmisic thing he had said.
I won't be stopping HRT that I've been on for 6 months, I don't care how many doors I shut/opportunities I lose(I'd rather live as myself), as for the brain and choices, I took 2 years to research and make my choice(my only regret is not being able to start earlier.
Sorry for the long paragraph, just wanted to get this off my chest.
Little bit of good news to though I got a job using my chosen name so that's nice.
Have a good day everyone.

I 29F and my husband 38M have been married for 4 years (5 years together). We're not the best at communicating but we did discuss a lot of things before we got married. One of the things we agreed on was having kids in the next few years.
Three years ago my husband lost his 7M with his ex gf to a hit and run accident. Both he and his ex went through a tough time. I never had the right to show any sign of sadness because the first thing he told me and kept saying whenever I tried to just listen to him or comfort him was "You don't have any of your own. You can't possibly understand what I'm going through" "You won't get it" And when I say nothing and carry on with my day he says things like "I'm glad one of us still has a normal life" I literally never knew what to do. I tried my best to just be there for him whatever he wanted but I never knew what it is.
A few months later he started to say things like how he doesn't want to experience such a thing ever again. How he never thought the loss of a child could affect someone this way. But I didn't think much of it because I thought he was grieving. (I've been on birth control since we got together. He never uses protection but after what happened he would ask if I take the pills on time constantly)
10 months after his son's death I got pregnant. It was unexpected. Maybe I would have argued a little but since he wasn't emotionally prepared both of us decided on abortion.
A few weeks ago, I had a busy week at work and couldn't do much on the weekend. I didn't go out (I cooked but couldn't do the dishes) and just tried to get as much rest. He came back later that night with two pregnancy tests. He's been paranoid about me getting pregnant since.
Last week we had an argument where he expressed how the idea of me ending up pregnant again scares him and that he barely remembered how to breathe when we were waiting for the tests result. I told him that I have no problem to wait for a few years but I want kids and nothing can change that. He lashed out at me and how I'm just looking for a reason to leave him and that he never really said he wanted kids. We really talked about this before we even got married and that's not what he said then.
It's been a week now and we haven't talked since. I'm staying with a friend. I'm close with one of my SILs she have been texting me how it would be horrible of me to leave him while he's still dealing with the loss of his son. I didn't leave him for that. I need tome to think and they know nothing about how much our life changed this past two years. He used to be sweet and calm. He's no more affectionate with me. I'm always careful about what I say or do. I love him but I don't like the way he treats me now. All he does is yell and scream at me. Now he can't even talk without grabbing me by the arm or face. Not to the point where I can't bear it but it does hurt (When he wouldn't lower his voice the last argument we had I refused to look at him and tried to go to the bathroom. He grabbed my face a couple of times and forced me to. When I pushed past him he smacked me on the back of my head. it wasn't hard but it did hurt a little). I feel like his family is right I'm his wife and supposed to support him but I really don't know what to do anymore.
Has anyone else been in the same situation? How did you handle it??

Over a year later I’m back to update everyone who has been asking. Feel free to read my other posts for more details but my original post is below with a final update after.
Two days ago my son “J” (17) came to my job upset & crying. He told me my step daughter “K”(19) came home with a ton of new things & when he checked his room the $ he had been saving was gone. K doesn’t have a job & when she does have $ she spends it like it’ll burn a hole in her pocket. My boss let me go home early & I went home to ask K who took her shopping? K told me she used her own $. I told her to tell me the truth & she told me to “mind my own business”. J has been working at Papa Murphy’s & has been saving it. He was saving to surprise the dad of his friend who passed away (Beau) for his 1st birthday without him. His friends had given him $ to load onto his card to pay at the pump. It’s this weekend for 2 days & they were going to “treat” dad. Most kids would be saving for their 1st car or cool clothes, but he wanted to just “be there” for his friend's dad.
Instead of arguing back & forth with K, I checked the camera we have to check on the dogs. It only caught her legs but it was K going into J’s room. The rule in my house is we don’t go into each other's room, it’s a mutual respect of privacy. I told K she was caught & that she needed to get everything to return it all. K started throwing every excuse “I had it saved for months”,”how do you know it was me?”, “someone must have broken in”.
Her mom came home & she burst into tears, saying we were ganging up on her. I showed my wife the video & what happened, K ended up saying “Why does he get to have all the money anyway!!?”. He worked his ass off. I told my wife she needed to make K return everything & she said no that it would be “embarrassing” to return it all & that when K got a job she would repay J. I said “It’ll be more embarrassing when she gets arrested for stealing $400”.
We argue & I tell my wife K broke a non negotiable rule as well as the law by stealing, she is 19, she doesn’t pay rent & needs to leave. My wife says “if you kick her out I’m going too”. So I asked if she was willing to replace the money stolen (we have separate bank accounts), force K to return, or she could give me her half of the rent early (we split all bills), “no”. They packed a few bags & left, I was not going to rip the bags of stuff out of her hands. I don’t think getting physical would have been the smartest thing to do. Before you make me out to be the asshole, I do not have extra money for him to still go. I can only replace the small amount back to his friends & it’s not enough to make the trip. He went to bed without eating & has been crushed.
I posted to a sub AITA & was flooded with people telling me I should have called the police. So this morning that is what I did. The solution was that the officer would call my wife to bring K to the station to talk or she could return the items & pay back J. Sort of a scare tactic because I was told it is a civil matter.
My wife straight up fucking lied to the officer & said she gave the money to K. Since I don’t have actual proof of J’s money, no proof other than her walking into his room, nothing can be done. I’m LIVID. I literally watched J get his heart broken at the police station. Through tears he said “how could they do this to me, what was this all for, I just wanted to see Beau’s dad”.
J is my son from a previous relationship. I had to lecture him on not keeping large amounts of cash in his room but he didn’t think it would get stolen. My wife & K have support, staying with family, this won’t affect them.
A good lawyer combined with police who didn’t give a shit and a prosecutor who wouldn’t charge K with anything, K is free. It’s almost too frustrating to even explain a year later but I had so many people asking. The packages were sent to my house and in my name so I couldn’t prove it was her. I couldn’t prove she stole J’s money. Every card she applied for and opened was acquired using my SSN and Driver's license so it was basically my fault she got ahold of my wallet. I couldn’t prove shit.
I’m still teaching and living in a cheap efficiency apartment. J is thriving but is currently stranded 14 hours from home at college where he will stay until I’m able to come up with the gas to go get him. K and my ex wife ruined my fucking life.

Long time lurker, first time poster.
Sorry this may be a long one. First a little backstory. Names and locations will be changed to maintain anonymity.
I (35F) grew up in a blended family. My parents got divorced when I was 10 and my dad remarried when I was 11. In addition to my younger sister (33F) from his previous marriage to my mom, I gained a step brother (27 M) and later a half brother, Ben(22 M). My sister and I spent every other weekend and summers at his house and the four siblings grew really close. We’re all each other’s best friends. I get a long okay with my step mom (let’s call her Anna). As we got older my dad became less involved and sometimes distant and basically let her raise the boys how she saw fit. With a lack of rules at home and few opportunities to make mistakes to learn and grow into adults. They are in their 20s but they are very infantilized. The younger one is not even allowed to change his hairstyle without permission or go on out of state trips by himself. It’s really weird but I moved abroad a decade ago and everyone back home just allows it.
Now on to the story at hand:
I live in an Asian country and a few years ago I met the love of my life and after meeting my family back home decided to get married. We had planned on doing just a courthouse thing because we were both not very big on something traditional, but we got swept up in the excitement knowing that my Dad and Sister would come if we decided to do a proper wedding.
In this country, wedding planning tends to go pretty fast as everything is usually done by one company. We gave our out of town friends and family a heads up in February that we’d have a ceremony in the fall and that we will set headcount no later than late Spring.
My step mom anointed herself the wedding planner as she’s passionate about it. She also cannot make the trip due to a disability which makes it hard for her to get around. It was getting close to crunch time for the headcount planning so I contacted her asking “hey I haven’t heard from the boys and I can follow up with them too, but do you know if any are planning on coming?” She then answers “no because the baby doesn’t know his school schedule and the older one can’t afford it”.
I was hoping to at least have one join as I assumed one would want to stay behind to stay with Anna but I was a little sad that neither of them contacted me to let me know directly. I told my sister who connected with them and told them to get in touch. The youngest was shocked to hear that he wasn’t going as he was under the impression that he was going and he had even picked up extra shifts at work to save extra money. My step brother confirmed it was a money issue which was totally fine and I thanked him for letting me know. I’m now excited that one of my brothers will also be joining.
Fast forward to Mother’s Day and Anna tells no Ben is not going. My Dad asserts that “he doesn’t know how to clean his room so why should he go?”
Once I hear about this conversation I’m irritated as I keep getting conflicting answers and I need to set my headcount. I Message my dad to get an update and he affirms “no Ben is not going because he ran up our car insurance up so his extra money will go towards that and he has to stay home with Anna”. I call up my dad to try to figure things out as the story keeps changing. I mention that I’m totally okay if the boys can’t come especially if it comes down to money, but the communication around everything has been really frustrating. He then proceeds to gaslight me asking:
“I don’t know why you care some much about whether or not your brothers come to your wedding”
“You’re doing too much. You should have just done the courthouse and call it a day”
And making me out to be a bridezilla.
The call got a little heated but we neither of us got rude or nasty. I finally ended the call with “I got the boys aren’t coming. That’s fine. Once I get confirmation on the accommodations I’ll let you know. Love you and have a good night” we hang up and I go to bed after venting about the whole situation with my sister.
I wake up the next morning to find a short message from my dad saying he’s not going anymore and to have a nice wedding. He’ll give his spot to Ben.
I am shocked. Not only did he drop himself from the wedding but over a misunderstanding on his part. I never guilted anyone about not including my brothers and did not beg or anything. I literally just commented on how frustrated I was with their communication but he aggressively wants to misunderstand for some reason.
I wrote back explaining my position and mentioning my disappointment in his decision but let him know the door is open if he changes his mind. I tried to message Anna but she’s been ignoring messages. From what I heard from my sister she is team dad and busy trying to vilify me.
The next day my dad basically admitted that the reason why none of the brothers are not going is because of my step mom. (Which I was suspicious of). He didn’t apologize but basically doubled down on saying I care too much. He also added he would be at my wedding after all.
The whole interaction has left the worst taste in my mouth:

1. My parents tried to make me look like the bad guy just for trying to clarify head count.
   
2. My dad tried to punish me by threatening not to come.
   
3. My dad finally admitted that it’s Anna who is blocking her sons from going but instead of sticking up for me he lets her get away with it to “keep the peace”
   
4. He never apologized for any of it.
   

It’s turned me off towards wedding planning especially as I wasn’t even that keen of having a wedding to start with. So, would I be the asshole if I uninvited him?
Thanks for reading.

I’m looking for a fic I read on AO3 and I didn’t bookmark it and I can’t remember the name. I searched through my history with no luck. I wonder if the author deleted it 🥺
Here are all the details I can immediately recall:
Hermione is the minister and she uses her political power to set Draco free when he expects to get the kiss, but he has to live as a muggle and of course doesn’t have a wand.
Draco meets a muggle guy at a bar and ends up becoming flatmates with him and another guy.
Draco sits with an old lady who has Alzheimer’s and periodically thinks Draco is her husband. He plays along when it happens
Hermione ends up having sex with the roommate of Draco’s that he had met in the bar and she ends up obliviating herself from his memory.
There’s a new threat and Hermione asks Draco to infiltrate the group and she gives him an insane black market wand. He does as she asks but she doesn’t hear from him for months. He killed the leader and polyjuiced as him almost the entire time he was away. He brings them to the ministry during a gala or something like that and Draco kills all the followers.
Draco has what appears to be mental issues, but it’s something darker than that. Kind of like dementors, but not that… they follow him around and it doesn’t bode well for his mental state.
Draco finds a 3 year old a boy named Leo by the lions at the zoo that had been abandoned. Hermione had gone to the bathroom and Draco is asking what his mother looks like and when he sees Hermione, he points to her.
Draco performs magic in front of Leo. Like making a 3 story slide and tent type thing.
Draco loves Leo and Hermione can’t bond with the little boy. Hermione goes into the boy’s memories and he was neglected and the mother was on drugs and the father was abusive to the mom (I think) and the mom ends up killing the dad and she’s the one who took Leo to the zoo and left him there. Draco is extremely protective of Leo.
Ron is NOT a good person and ends up with the R word carved into his forehead by Draco with the wand Hermione had given him after he does something horrible to her while Draco was out walking with Leo and comes back when it’s happening.
Harry and Ron are both Aurors and Ron is suspended after what happens.
Draco ends up wiping the boy’s memory of all magic and him and Hermione and calls to have the boy picked up and placed with a loving family. He did it for Hermione, but she thought he wiped out the painful things the boy experienced, which she knows will make him into who he is supposed to be, just like all of it made Draco into who he was.
The old lady that Draco sits with is actually a witch (a Hufflepuff I think and her husband was pretty much how Draco was to Hermione at Hogwarts) and she knows what’s actually wrong with Draco and she has to do some memory magic to help get rid of them and she accidentally completely wipes Hermione out of his mind in the process.
Hermione is pregnant and for some reason Draco goes to the hospital I think the old lady told him to go and talks to Ron outside after being inside and asks who Hermione had been with or something like that… and at some point Ron lifts up his hair that he grew out to cover what Draco carved into his forehead and told him that he was the one who did that.
The ending is in Hermione’s minister office and her secretary is a muggle and she says she tried to keep them from coming in just as Draco and their children come running in to Hermione’s office.
I hope that’s enough to help it be recognized! I think it was from like 2010-2015…

I have been through so much and I am exhausted.
Since November of last year, I have been dealing with a conflict with my in-laws:

• A group picture of my parents, my fiancé’s parents, my fiancé, and I was posted by my MIL on a Facebook story post. Let’s call my fiancé, Jerry (fake name). There was a caption on the photo and the caption only covered my face and my parents. When pointed out, Jerry blamed it on her tech incompetence.
  
• Following this incident above, an argument ensues between me and Jerry (I talked about my feelings regarding his family, how I was treated, etc.) to the point that he started a group chat on Facebook messenger the next day out of anger. He threw me, his sister, and his mom into the group to "sort this out" and threw me under the bus. I quickly left the group.
  
• I went to my parent’s house to clear my head for a few days and told Jerry that I need to rethink this relationship. He had an emotional breakdown because of this.
  
• This incident snowballed with questions from his family as they were “blindsided”. I mentioned all the things said and done by his mom over the past 5 years (when I first met his mother, she said that our relationship would not work out due to cultural differences and few other offensive comments in the years ahead)
  
• I was met with "I am sorry if I offended you". His mother sent another attempt at an apology that was a potential apology. However, I could not respond as I was blocked. Then a letter was sent to me from her that was a rug sweep "I am sorry that this has all happened. Can't we move past this".
  
• In December of last year, I informed Jerry that I needed to heal from everything and for that, I do not wish to go with him on Christmas. Every year, his family meet on Christmas. I asked him if he would like to spend it with me. If not, that is totally okay. I also said that he should go because I knew I would be blamed for it. Well, I was blamed for it. I was called manipulative and on a power trip.
  
• His family further tells questioned him for spending Christmas with me because according to them, I don’t celebrate Christmas. He’s white and I am not. I stated to him that his family does not go to Church nor are they practicing Christians. I celebrate Christmas (gift exchanges and dinners) the same way as they do. They did not apologize for their comment.
  
• From December to March, my fiancé has had numerous conversations with his father and mother to resolve the conflict which now involved the entire family. During this span of time and in their absence, I started to heal and focused on my relationship with my fiancé.
  
• Then come March; his father was still stuck in his anger. Did not reflect for the last three months and informed my fiancé that they are not coming to our wedding. I admit that I was so angry that I threatened to divorce him should they not come to our wedding and that he continues a relationship with them. I apologized for what I said afterwards.
  
• We were about to meet up in person to resolve this however, his father decided to send a group text in advance of our meet up and informed us that he is not interested in extending an olive branch. He was bullying us into submission (please see my past posts), blamed me for how I handled things and boldly stated that if I wasn’t his son’s fiancé, he would have nothing to do with me. When called out for his rude texts, his father stated that he needed to get it off his chest to heal.
  
• For days after the texts, Jerry stood up for me and fought with his dad. Eventually, his dad agreed to come to town to “talk”. I was so incredibly hurt from his dad’s actions and I bluntly stated to Jerry that if he continues to berate me in person when we meet up, I will get up and leave the conversation. Jerry immediately got upset, raised his voice at me and left the apartment. I had no idea that he got up to go kill himself, I thought he just left to cool off like he usually does. I later learned that he felt unsupported by me.
  
• Couple days later; Jerry had another meltdown. His parents and all his friends drove down to meet with him to provide support. Before they reached, I got to his place early and his friend was there. Jerry had too much to drink and was at his lowest point. I tried to calm him down, but he was angry to the point that I left the apartment in tears. He humiliated me when he yelled at me in front of his friend. Then at the end of the night, I brought up the issues with his parents to try to resolve. I was later told that I made it about me when I confronted his parents.
  
• Weeks later; his parents met up with Jerry and my parents for their wedding clothing shopping. I decided not to show up.
  
• Jerry and I moved into our new place, with furniture shipped in and it needed to be put together. His dad offered to drive down to help Jerry put the furniture together. I appreciated the fact that the furniture was put together. Jerry was practically upset that I am not recognizing his dad’s efforts when I said it does not erase everything he has done. His father did not even apologize to me once and I should be okay because of the furniture? An argument ensues and it escalated to a point where I could not take it anymore and I went to take my life. Even at my lowest point, Jerry still got mad at me.
  
• And now he is profusely apologizing for betraying me and hurting me. I feel that I don’t even know who he is anymore.
  

They did nothing wrong. I'm the a-hole here. But I'm getting this off my chest.
They've been together for a while. At first I was happy to see how her mental health got better, she's more relaxed, she stopped putting her trauma weight onto me, we are getting along pretty well since there's someone be her company now.
So I didn't mind her boyfriend that much. But then I started to feel really, really uncomfortable. Whenever we (me and my mom) spending time together he always brought up his daughter in the topic. Like she's better than me, she's more decent than me, and so on. My mother starts taking his daughter as her second child but I don't want to do anything with this man. When my mom wanted to hang out with me to eat at some restaurant in my birthday yesterday, he was like why would she do that, and he wanted my mom to spend time with him instead, and looked annoyed as hell when she declined his offer. But man she's with you all the time, why would you be so pity for her spending a day with her son?
She also gave him the key to get into my apartment. Mine. Sometimes he would barge in to get stuff. It feels so disturbed and weird to have another person that I'm not comfortable and close enough with to go in and out of my house. I didn't really make my mom feel off by saying like stop allowing him to this and that, I just mentioned that I feel weird about it, but she just thought I was overreacted. I'm always overrated in her eyes.
I appreciate this man by treating my mom nice and patiently but it's so hard to accept another stranger's presence to have them in your life. I don't want anything to change but my mom's feelings are my privilege for me. That's it. Thanks for reading.

My wife and I have been together since 2017 in 2019 we decided we wanted to try to have a baby. We got pregnant on the first try which we didn’t expect. Because of COVid we weren’t able to be legally married until 3 weeks after our son was born this question was brought to an Allegheny County judge who ruled in our favor and he was from that point on legally my son. In 2020 we fell into a rough patch in life, we asked my wife’s parents if our son could stay there while we found another apartment, he wasn’t there a week before I was served with a petition for emergency custody which was granted by a westmoreland county judge. For two years I’ve had to battle with this family to get just visitation with my son, which was grated over a year ago, but my wife’s family didn’t think they were obligated to follow a court order so I filed contempt, and wouldn’t you know it I got a visit the very next week. I’ve paid attorneys I’ve paid supervision fees all to just see my son who wasn’t taken from me because I was neglectful or abusive he’s not with me because her family doesn’t believe in my rights as a parent. Not on Friday I got paperwork saying they’re appealing my right to the Pennsylvania supreme courts. They’re trying to take my rights for nothing more than a 3 week discrepancy in marriage and birth. If anyone can help please I’m desperate, I just want my son back.

I'm just tired of the dozens and dozens of posts powerscaling Cross Guild oh so wrongly, so I sat down and am about to finish the conversation once and for all.

1. Buggy. I think this is obvious enough that I don't need to explain it, but still. An Emperor of the Sea that is finally caught up with the likes of Blackbeard, Straw Hat, and Shanks, a former warlord, the mastermind behind the Impel Down incident, recognised by both Crocodile and the world's best swordsman. Also, he beat Roronoa Zoro and would have killed Straw Hat if his daddy hadn't been there to save his ass, so yeah.
2. Crocodile. I really would prefer to avoid agenda talk, but I know I won't hear the end of it from Mihawkards. I really don't care, though: Crocodile beat an Emperor of the Sea, twice he beat him, before the time skip. Imagine what he could do right now. Also, former warlord, logia user, transcended gender, and was recognised by the Revolutionary Army to the point that he gave birth to Dragon's son. Fight me.
3. Mihawk. People say I hate him. I'm just impartial! I like Mihawk! He beat Roronoa at Baratie and hurt Straw Hat at Marineford, so he does have feats. He's also a former warlord, and now that he's Buggy's third-in-command, we can assume he is at least YCL. I favor Crocodile, but I do think the Croco-agenda in general underestimates Mihawk. Like, come on, guys, him and Sanji would be 50-50. A true threat with so much potential.
4. Daz Bones. Not much to say here: he's been an executive for two warlords, an emperor, and fought Roronoa equally. He did lose to Mihawk at Marineford, though, so a solid fourth place. Maybe when he awakens his fruit, though...? I mean, Oda has sidelined him for so long, he's bound to have a big moment like that soon.
5. T-Bone's killer. Okay, hear me out. Other characters have names and no feats (I'm looking at you, Worst Generation). What does this guy have? Well, definitely the raw power to mortally wound a high-ranking marine officer, plus the smarts to bypass his OH, and the skill to be accepted by the future King of the Pirates. Remember when Blackbeard was a no-name at Whitebeard's crew? Oda is clearly foreshadowing something for this guy...
6. Puggy. People are going to hate me for this one, but I'm comfortable putting him at 6th place. He did go toe-to-toe with Zoro and Sanji, but that was like two or three power boosts ago. He is also Buggy's bodyguard and that is something, but it's not like Buggy needs that much protection anyway. Like, Big Mom had to be put to sleep and traumatized just to make her vulnerable to attacks. I didn't see the need for a bodyguard with her, so I def. don't see it either with Buggy.

7-8. Galdino and Alvida: Honestly, interchangeable. Galdino beat Dorry and Broggy, and Alvida had Garp's protegee under her boot until Straw Hat came along, so they're forces to be reckoned with. Still, ultimately all Ls.

1. Kabaji. Too many swordsmen in this crew, no? Lost to Roronoa, but managed to hurt him, so def. above Mohji and Richie.
   
2. Mohi and Richie. Look, they are the emotional backbone of Cross Guild. No one is disputing that. In a crew of monsters, you need some grounded characters for the readers to identify with, and that's them. Still, powerscaling-wise, here they are. I'm open to disagreement on this one, though!
   
3. Kinoko. "Ooooooh he was a level 5 Impel Down prisoner, he's so stroooooong" shut up. Where are the receipts? Show me any feats. One, I'm only asking for one thing he's done in 1114 chapters. Total fraud. Shouldn't even be here.
   

I’m a 20 year old male living in a South Asian household. I have a full-time remote job and will be starting university later this fall. I’ve had very strict parents since I was a kid. My first ever tech was a tablet which I got when I was 14, even then my parents always kept a strict check. When i turned 15 and wanted to make social media accounts, my mom almost lashed out at me threatening to take away my tablet WHICH i was only allowed to use for 2-3 hours a day. Later on, when I turned 16-17 I wasn’t allowed to go on hangouts with my friends, and If i really had to, i would be interrogated like hell ( who’s coming, what will you do, where will you go) and if i was lucky to get past that, i was allowed to be out for 1.5 hours MAX. As soon as the clock churned in 90 mins, I used to get a call from my mom asking me to come back in 10 mins. I could never go out for stuff like movies, bowling, concerts etc because all of this can’t be done in under 90 mins. Best I could do was grab a quick meal from a nearby place or a cup of coffee with my friends and THATS IT. Apart from that, they constantly monitored my phone activity and i couldn’t even send VMs or make calls at home because well they’d ask me everything i did so lol.
Fast-forward to today, I’m grown up, have a job, and will be going to uni soon. STILL i feel like they’re not giving me the freedom I deserve. First off, they didn’t allow me to work in the office and asked me to look for something online, which honestly i wanted too so i kind off didn’t mind that ( not that it makes it right). I work with a team in the US and am located in South Asia so obviously i have to work the night shift, and whenever im WORKING, taking WORK meetings, it’s not uncommon for my mom to walk in my room and ask who that was on the laptop. Sure this doesn’t happen all the time and I can go out for like 3 ish hours now without getting a ring from my parents but it still isn’t enough. My friends planned a trip up north for 3-4 days last month, I wanted to go so bad and I wasn’t even asking them to pay for it because I obviously earn and had more than enough to pay for everything. STILL they refused and said that you’re not going anywhere like that. Similarly, they also planned a day retreat and a pool day 70-80 kms outside the city at a private farmhouse, wasn’t allowed to go over there either.
I’m genuinely so fed up with this. I haven’t gotten a chance to properly enjoy my teenage and now even in my twenties i don’t have the freedom to go out, despite having a job. My mom is against me moving out for college but im applying to places outside our city on purpose so I genuinely get to go and be free for once.
For the time being, How should i take to the average asian parents and tell them to not be as controlling of their sons life as they are lol it’s getting very annoying and i feel like im going to rage out soon. I don’t smoke, drink, hang out with girls alone ( only in group settings) or do anything that would cause them to restrict my activity lol. Even the gym they allowed me to go to is like a 5 min walk from home and if by any chance im even 10-15 mins late from a workout my mom would interrogate me about why it was taking this long.
Anything would help atp lol

TW: miscarriage
Here are just a few things off the top of my head this woman has done to me over the past few years:
Comments on my weight
Asking if I ate that day
Asking if my miscarriage was because of my weight
Yelling at me when finding out I was pregnant because “this never happened before me”
Making us go try on engagement rings because I was pregnant
Telling me the next time I get pregnant we need to hang me upside down so I don’t lose the baby
Telling me my pregnancy test line was too faint and they didn’t want to get their hopes up when finding out I’m pregnant with son
Telling me not to stress about my mom being in icu because it would affect baby
Going around my baby shower asking my friends if they had a specific diaper brand because it was dumb that I did
Sitting me down for almost an hour telling me how she hates the girl name I have and she’d refuse to call her that and tell the baby her parents were on drugs for choosing that name
Gaslighting and saying she “didn’t mean it like that”
Showing up to the hospital while I’m in labor after I said I don’t want visitors and walking in while I’m getting my cervix checked
Demanding to come back during my golden hour after my husband said no and trying to yank the blanket off my while breastfeeding for the first time
Not telling us merry Christmas because I didn’t let them take blanket off baby (baby was born Christmas Eve) Telling us our boundaries with baby are stupid and she would “kiss him on the lips if she wanted” and still kissed baby
Getting mad that we wanted one weekend to ourselves without visitors and ignored us for three weeks
Getting mad I didn’t give her my baby immediately after arriving because I had to feed and change him
Not acknowledging me on my first Mother’s Day
Like I said.. this is just off the top of my head. My husband has a hard time standing up to her. He’s an only child and feels like he “owes them”. We had a decent relationship before baby because I didn’t stand up for myself. Now that I have boundaries and they don’t like it they treat me like I don’t exist. I think in her mind she would babysit and have baby all the time and that didn’t happen. I think this is the one thing she can’t be in control over and it kills her. Anyways, advice?? Am I being too sensitive??

Disclaimer: English is not first langauge, if you detect any grammatic error, you may ignore it.

1. Backgroung of My Misfurtune.

I started dating this young lady, that I've known for several years in 2020. When I say I've known her before we started a relationship, I'm talking about knowing her from a distance not on a personal level. My judgement of her was based solely on how I perceived her from a distance. She seemed like a collected and well mannered young lady. That is what exactly attracted me to her at the first place, her beautiful personality so I thought. Only If I knew that I was about to make the biggest mistake of my life that would completely ruin and change my life as I knew it.
Months in our relationship, I came to the realisation that the girl was far from what I thought she was. It turned out she was a pathological lier, blackmailer, and very slow intellectually. Exactly the type of girl that I would not date under any circumstances. In order not to waste our time, I started to plan my exit way out of the relationship without hurting her feelings. I reduced the number of times that I would call her and I stopped inviting her to my place. One day I told her the truth, that I'm no longer interested in the relationship, and it's better we end the relationship since we have been only dating for a few months. And at first she was okey with it, we parted ways.

1. Things Get Interesting

After being away from her for a month, I received a sms saying that she is pregnant. At first I did not believe her, so I had to call her to do a pregnant test in person and it was positive. She was pregnant. I had my paternity doubts but I accepted the pregnancy and I told her that I will support the baby and support her during pregnancy but I made myself clear that I did not want a romantic relationship with her. I had paternity doubts because this is the girl that I had sex with only 5 times. Four was with condoms, and one was unprotected sex but we used withdrawal method.

1. Things Got Worse

I dont know whether I made a mistake by promising to support her during pregnancy but she took it as if we are back in a romantic relationship. She would demand attention from me, and she would fight girls that people saw me hanging out with. Things were getting out of control to the point that I was led into depression. The drama that she created became the talk of the neighbourhood and this was very embarrasing to me because I held a highly respected job in the community.

1. The Blackmail

She started threatening me with ruining my life, saying stuff like either she have me or nobody will have me. I dismissed most of her threats and atributed it to mood swings of a pregnant woman, and I must admit that I was so foolish for dismissing her threats. I shoud've have taken her threat seriously, the earlier the better.

1. Getting fired from work

One day at work right after morning breafing, the management called me in their office to have a word with me. I knew the management call you in only if you are getting promoted, transfered, served with a warning for misconduct or get fired. I was curious, why the management wanted to talk to me. I entered the office and I was told that my ex girlfriend had reported me at work for sexually abusing her, and to protect the image of the company they would investigate these sexually allegations leveled against me by my ex.
Some of my co-workers and managers did not like me at all, and the opportunity that they had been waiting for to destroy me has finally presented itself. Also, later along the line, I was informed by one of the manager who was my friend that, it was one of his collegue who told my ex that if she want to hurt me really bad, she should lay false sexual harrassment allegations against me at work.

1. A Kangaroo Hearing

The girl was not present at the hearing, It was only me, a 29 year old man against a panel of powerful managers and directors. I was told that they don't care whether the allegations are true or false, unfortunately they have no choice but to fire me in order to protect the reputation of the company. The hearing lasted 1 hour, and I was told to leave their work premises. This was September 2020 during the height of pandemic. I packed my bags, and bid farewell to my teary co workers who knew I was innocent.

1. Shame and Stigma

Here I was, unemployed at 29 during the pandemic, with a tag of sex offender on my neck. I was confused and lost. How would I tell my friends who held me in high regard? How would I tell my mother who spent so much on my education both high school and university? How would the young men in my family who look up to me react? Where can I go from now onwards? Luckly enough neither my friends nor family judged me because they know the type of a person I am.

1. Poverty and Recovery

When I lost my job, I literally lost everything. My house and car was repossed, I was literally stripped of everything. I would had been homeless had I not have a supporting family. My married brother had pity on me, and he invited me to stay with him. I was so ashamed of myself being taken care of by another man at age 29 knowing very well that months ago, I was an independent man and I had my life together. I was ashamed finding myself, sleeping on a matress. I was very shamed of myself that I could not even afford basic stuffs like toiletries. I leaped into depression, withdrew from friends, stayed indoor for 24 hours. I contempleted and attempted suicide several times. I lost weight, and I was ashamed and scared to meet people who knew how I was looking before I lost my job because my body was very emanciated. I looked as if I had been in a hospital for a year.
In the midst of my hopelessness and depression, I kept praying to God to come at my rescue. In 2022 things started getting better for me. Through a friend, we started a business which is doing fine, eventhough we are not yet where we want to be. And should everything go according to the plan, next year we plan to extend our opperation to other cities. I can see that God has answeared my prayers, and I must say the future look bright. I've gained weight, started going to the gym and Im starting to regain everything that I lost in 2020.

1. What About My Son?

The problem I have is I truly hate this girl with every fibre of my being. Just by the thought of her my mood instantly change. I cant see myself co-parenting with her, after all what she put me through. And if I happen to die, I cant stand the thought of my son sharing his inheritance from me with his mother. I have moved on but I haven't forgiven her, and I dont think I will ever forgive her. It is by God's grace that Im still alive today, because only a few can bounce back from the hell that I have been to.
Can I move on and completely close that door to start another family, or should I stay with my son and co-parent with the devil? I need advice from fellow men.
I would read comments.

Hi everyone!
I`ve been lurking here for a bit and I figure, now is my time to shine! 😅😭 First of all, I`m nearly 40 and I have only recently learned of the language to describe my upbringing and my relationship with my mother. Has this happened to anyone else? I thought my parents just sucked. I had no idea I was being parentified, gaslit and taken advantage of(and still am by my mother).
Little background: I`m the eldest child in my family. My brother is 5 years my junior. My parents married young (17&19) and my mom divorced my dad when I was 12. Also note: I grew up in a Hispanic American household, which added to the situation for me, as if you know, the sons in these households are often doted upon and the daughters are second class citizens who at the same time get dumped with a lot of responsibility.
Before my parents divorce, my mom confided in me at about age 10-12 about her marriage with my dad, how she wanted to leave, abuse, etc.(then after the divorce confided in my about her dating life, abortion, other personal matters). I encouraged her to divorce him and she eventually did. These days she says that none of that ever happened, that she credits her divorce to her male friends at the time(oh yeah, my mother is a lowkey misogynist). Ever since the divorce, I`ve had to sort out my mom's finances because she is irresponsible(bankruptcy, prone to overspending, prone to being scammed). She has borrowed money from me since I started working at 15. I made the mistake of one time co-signing for her on a purchase and had to end up paying for it all to avoid messing up my credit because she refused to pay.
I moved away when I was 24 and was away from my mom for 13 years, during which time she still borrowed money, came to me with her problems, asked me to do things for her, stressed me out by trying to figure out her life from another state. I recently moved back after going through my own divorce and living with her has been a big challenge. I`m hoping to move out sooner rather than later(getting my life together to leave a very expensive California), but in the interim, it is very frustrating. Today I feel like I`m on the verge of tears still having to be the parent in this relationship. I still have to handle events that she cannot herself, read paperwork, make sure she isn`t getting herself into deeper issues with her finances. All of this while trying to remain calm while I deal with her because she gaslights me and makes me feel like I`m the one with the bad attitude. I have to speak to her gently and like a child so that she doesn't get upset.
Anyway. Sorry for the rant. I wanted to come here to vent and also connect with people who understand. At this point, I know it will never change. I have accepted that. My goal is to move on with my life and help when I can but not overextend myself when I move out. It's unfortunate that I didn`t get parents who were reliable(haven't spoken to my dad in about 15 years. That is its own bullshittery). The end.
Thanks for reading.

I’m a new grandma and looking to find some resources for my daughter.
While pregnant, my daughter’s partner and father of her child was mentally and (mildly) physically abusive. He held her down by her neck while fighting and punched a wall next to her head.
She got a restraining order and he was removed from their apartment. When it was time for the baby to be born, she decided to remove the order (since he was being “nice”) and allowed him to be there for the birth. In the first week it seemed like he was going to step up and be a good co-parent. They are still living apart thank god!
He has since resumed mentally abusing her with a lot of name calling and threatening to get a lawyer to get visitation. He has no car, and she has made the effort to drive to him so he can see his son. He lives with a bunch of men in a house where he rents a room. (No place for a baby.)
Last night while she was there he had another meltdown calling her horrible names, and said she was trying to keep his son from him. 🤦🏽‍♀️
She needs to send in the birth certificate and has said she doesn’t want him on it. I told her that wouldn’t do anything. He signed the form recognizing paternity. It seems that she should add him and send in the paternity paper work OR shouldn’t add him to the BC and not send in the paternity form. Thoughts?
First, she needs to cut all contact with him and stick to it. It’s not helping her case by continuing to try to coparent with him.
She (and I) want to keep this baby safe. What can be done? Who can we talk to without a lot of $$$ for a lawyer?