Heavy on the spoilers and devoid of all brevity, but if I do not get this off my chest I will lose my mind. I’ve been on a Shatter Me high all week. The first three books have altered my brain chemistry. I have said the words “Aaron Warner, the man you are” so many times I am beginning to question my sanity. I cracked open Restore Me last night, fully prepared to trust-fall into the arms of my #1 Fictional Boyfriend of all time.
So, um, what the fuck was that?
Look, I can forgive messy plotlines and overwriting, I can ignore ill-planned and lazily-executed rebel coups. I can even appreciate the absurd surplus of metaphors and similes crammed in between strings of dialogue, if for no reason other than comedic value.
What I can’t get behind is Book 4 Aaron Warner.
Seriously, who is this guy? Because I’ve gone through the five stages of grief, turned around and reread the entire book in frank disbelief, and the only conclusion I can possibly come to is that I’ve somehow picked up an imposter, written in very bad faith. When Adam Kent did a 180 in Ignite Me and went from “gentle, pathetic childhood crush who can suffer through Juliette’s touch in some small capacity” to “bitter, controlling ex-boyfriend driven mad with jealousy,” we all understood this to be much-needed fan service. Juliette was, after all, being an idiot; she needed a little push, to realize that Aaron Warner was the undisputed crown jewel. Most of us came to this conclusion two and a half books ahead of her, but better late than never. I walked away from Ignite Me feeling content. The power couple has been established. Anderson is dead. Juliette’s rise to Supreme Commander was satisfying, if a bit hasty. I went into Restore Me confident that, with Aaron at her side, Juliette could achieve anything.
The transition was…jarring, to say the least.

“The Reestablishment does not allow time for people to grieve.” - Book 3 Aaron.

(Alas, this is Book 4, and *insert obligatory Bob Dylan joke*)
The Times, They Are a’ Changin’
Anyway, what I’m getting at here is that Aaron is grieving, he is mourning, he is SAD. This is totally understandable, both to me as a reader and to Juliette as a character. It appears to be the guiding factor behind his new penchant for stonewalling and emotional blackmail. Before diving into THAT can of worms, I’d like to add a couple of bullets to my list of “Miscellaneous What-and-Why-the-Fucks:”

• Why does Juliette have zero advisors? Where is her council? Her attendants? Her scribe? Her translator? Her GUARDS?
• What, exactly, is Kenji’s job? She refers to him as her “second-in-command,” and while I adore his character, I can’t help but feel that lending snarky input does very little in the way of running a tight ship. Why is she entirely on her own?

Moving on.
A TIMELINE OF SHITTY EVENTS, IN WHICH I HANG UP MY ‘ADAM KENT’S #1 HATER’ JACKET AND SHRUG ON MY ‘AARON WARNER SUCKS’ VEST:

• Juliette is trying to make peace between two unruly schoolboys who refuse to get along at the playground. Sorry, Juliette is trying to make peace between two grown men, both of whom appear, in some capacity, involved in the running of North America. This is going “Not Very Well,” if Aaron’s botched haircut is any indication. Fortunately, he comes to terms with his Slim Shady Era, and while he’s clearly going through some things, I could roll with the punches and learn to love the buzz cut, if only he didn’t IMMEDIATELY TURN INTO THE JOKER AFTER THIS.
• Aaron knows better than anyone else about the role and responsibilities of a Supreme Commander. Still yet, he appears completely uninvolved in Juliette’s day-to-day regimen. He makes zero effort to inform her about details that might save her from needless embarrassment. Her fuck-ups seem imminent. Perhaps this is why he has no inclination to avoid them, nor lessen their impact on her pride or public image. Slim Shady is a lone wolf. He has completely forgotten that whole “I’ve told you from the start, we would make an excellent team” spiel. North America is a One-Woman (De?)establishment. Kenji appears to play the role of court jester, though he lends emotional support when necessary–and always with more empathy and forethought than Regent Warner, who, I might remind you, has the power of READING ENERGIES (“hers, especially”).
• Enter Delalieu, to inform Juliette her quarters are overflowing with unanswered mail, and worry that this may reflect poorly upon her as a new leader, to which she’s like “I have quarters?” This revelation comes on the heels of Castle’s memo that “all of her correspondence is being monitored.” I suspect somehow this is Castle’s fault, which brings me to my follow-up point.
• In Book 4, Castle becomes less of an incompetent hippie and more of a prick to Juliette. He terrorizes her with cryptic warnings, but refuses to divulge any information he may have about Warner’s past, which–given her new status–seems like it ought to be grounds for some sort of official noncompliance. He also had her reach out to the other supreme commanders “as an experiment.” It was at this point I decided I wasn’t a fan of how everyone kept undermining or making a mockery of Juliette at every turn. I couldn’t help but notice how Castle’s comments to Aaron about her went entirely unchecked. I am reminded, if you will, of that scene in Shatter Me, when Aaron staged a big spectacle in which a soldier was killed, to ensure his men knew not to fuck with Juliette. He seems to have forgotten this virtue, in Book 4.
• Despite being warned that Ibriham’s children are en route, Aaron lets a conversation with Kent take precedence over informing Juliette what to expect, how to dress, what to say, etc. Castle also informs him once Haider arrives. Juliette chooses to meet Haider without waiting for Aaron, but he should have been there regardless. He can FEEL her energy, he doesn’t need her to say it out loud to realize she’s insecure and needs him to be there, and she wouldn’t BE insecure about so much shit if he would step in and stop allowing everyone to make her the butt of every joke!!! Where’s that supportive boyfriend act you roped us all in with, buddy? Also, literally neither she nor Kenji know jack shit about politics, why would he let them walk into a meeting with the children of foreign leaders entirely blind?
• Speaking of the meeting with Haider, Aaron has a closet full of clothes organized by color and shade; yet he didn’t think to help Juliette pick out a new wardrobe for her designation as Supreme Commander? He literally chose her entire last wardrobe, and look, I get it, they’re busy with war things and his evil dad is dead and that’s sad and all, but don’t introduce us to a standard you can’t maintain! She goes to meet this snotty rich boy in BLUE JEANS AND A PINK SWEATER. Kenji “cringes” at her. This was so humiliating I literally felt my face getting hot when I read it.
• Again, Castle specifically *told* Aaron when Haider arrived, but when he and Juliette discuss it later, he turns it around on her to justify why he didn’t show up to support her!

“You didn’t tell me he’d arrived earlier. I wish I could’ve been there to assist somehow.”
Like, are you fucking kidding me? Again, he can FEEL her energy; he is well aware that she spent that meeting getting humiliated, and still decides to make his absence a product of her incompetence. Like, his entire pep talk after this left me filled with visceral rage.

• Allow me to share this absolutely infuriating passage in Aaron’s POV:

“She [Nazeera] has the same long legs and lean frame as her brother, and she carries herself with great pride, like someone who was born into position and privilege. She wears a gray tunic cut from fine, heavy fabric; skintight leather pants; heavy boots; and a set of glittering gold knuckles on both hands.
And I’m not the only one staring.
Juliette, who’s been watching quietly this whole time, is looking up, amazed. I can practically see her thought process as she suddenly stiffens, glances down at her own outfit, and crosses her arms over her chest as if to hide her pink sweater from view. She’s tugging at her sleeves as though she might tear them off.
It’s so adorable I almost kiss her right then.”

Are you fucking SERIOUS? So she is here, dying of embarrassment, already feeling inferior because she’s comically underdressed and only speaks one language, and his response is to GAWK AT A HOT GIRL IN FRONT OF HER AND INFANTILIZE HER IN HIS INNER MONOLOGUE. “I’m not the only one staring” ???? Be so for real right now, like I am lost for words!

• Aaron is “fairly certain” and generally insistent that Castle’s suspicions will prove false. Like, why would Castle just be pulling random hunches like this out of his ass? When I read it, I was like, “Hmm, kinda sounds like Aaron is just rationalizing why he isn’t going to tell Juliette any of this.” Spoiler alert: I was right.
• Aaron sits in silence and watches Juliette flounder helplessly while trying to explain to Haider how she only sort of knows what the “Continental Symposium” is.* OH YEAH, DID I MENTION IT IS ALSO TWO DAYS AWAY? Like, Aaron clearly knows this is a big deal, it appears to be a tradition of sorts. Why is he once again letting his girlfriend be humiliated and condescended by their guests? He also *CRINGES,* he CRINGES at her for not knowing about it. Like, at this point I am beginning to greatly resent this man.
• He also doesn’t defend Juliette when Haider calls her “some idiot psychotic girl” TO HIS FACE. RIGHT IN FRONT OF HER. Actually, SHE steps in and defends HIM. I wish she hadn’t. After this, in his inner monologue, Aaron is like, “I wonder if she knows I would do anything for her.” FUCKING DO SOMETHING WARNER, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD.
• Juliette peeks in on Aaron in his office, finds him listening to old vinyl, discovers he likes Bob Dylan. ME TOO, BUDDY, I’ve seen him live. Might I suggest a little less “Like a Rolling Stone” and a little more “Just Like a Woman,” “Tangled Up in Blue,” “Lay Lady Lay,” ‘COZ I AM BEGINNING TO HATE YOUR ASS FOR THE WAY YOU ARE TREATING JULIETTE!
• Again, Aaron is fully aware of Castle’s warnings that people are coming for Juliette. WHY is she walking unarmed and unguarded on the beach at night? That’s right, because he ran off with Haider to count gold coins or suck each other off or something, leaving her to be sad and alone and not on the lookout for danger. Once again, he fails to come through and keep her safe, and she gets hit with some kind of bullet or dart or something.
• AGAIN, why is Castle allowed to stand here and disrespect Juliette right to Warner’s face, invalidate her and tell him how HE should have been the one who became Supreme Commander? Like, she already has zero support around her whatsoever and this rat is allowed to talk shit about all the things she does and doesn’t know, what she gets told, and potentially also her MAIL. Why hasn’t Warner killed this fucker yet? Warner, ARE YOU STILL IN THERE?
• Remember when Aaron was clever? Yeah, me too. He seems to have abandoned that trait in Book 4. Things like “taking basic precaution” no longer hold any precedence. He and Juliette have, however, found the time to fuck twice, despite having no time or opportunity for all the critical conversations they’re not having that could have redeemed Aaron Warner in my heart and mind. P R I O R I T I E S.
• *slams the back of his head against the wall in frustration* I actually had an ex who did this once when I caught him cheating. It is not something intelligent people do, in my experience. I am beginning to hate Aaron the way I hated Adam. Side note, I still hate Adam. Glad he kind of disappears after the first couple of chapters.
• Great, Juliette is now hallucinating from poison bullets. Good thing Aaron is there to…look really scared and terrify her even more. Moral support? Don’t know him! Just…staring fearfully, jumping in to prevent her from going outside. Maybe a pat on the head or something would help…no? Okay then.
• At this point he decides it’s time to fess up. He couldn’t have chosen a worse time, by the way. Juliette asks if it’s okay if she washes the blood and sand off first (she was just attacked on the beach, remember?). She is clearly still sick and “hallucinating” (seeing the bright white lights outside of her window, the way people do right before they die). Maybe he could…I don’t know…HELP HER? Run her bathwater? Help her clean up? Yeah no, he just nods. She can do all that by herself, just like everything around here. Juliette, girl, if you don’t kick this deadbeat to the curb I’m gonna SCREAM. P.S.: WHO IS THIS MAN? THIS IS NOT THE AARON WARNER I KNOW. Remember how he remembered to bring gloves and a coat for her before he dropped her off at Omega Point? They weren’t even dating yet. How hard did he slam his head into the wall? Maybe he should keep going. Maybe he would like a little help? I’m not busy at all rn.
• See the thing is, now Aaron has to do a big fess up about Juliette’s life. He’s obviously lied and withheld some vital information, but more importantly he spent a couple of years torturing a sister she doesn’t know about yet. And while I realize he didn’t have any CHOICE in this particular matter, I also loathe him at this point for a ton of other shit he’s done leading up to this, so it’s really hard to feel sorry for him when–REALLY THEY FIND TIME TO FUCK AGAIN AT THIS POINT? SOMETHING IS FUCKING WRONG WITH THESE TWO. I can’t help but notice she’s “crawled on top of him” both times now. Guess she’s doing all the work in the sack, as well. Remember that “flip over on your stomach” line from Ignite Me? That guy is dead now. This dude blows and I hate him. Separate LOL at “onto to the floor.” That’s really in there. You can check.
• So the only time these two can communicate is during coitus. Cool. Maybe instead of reminding each other of their mutual love, they could reinforce their bond with something like…confessional hour? Maybe Aaron could use his energy to feel her energy and figure out something safe to say, that isn’t super fucked up and wrong. Spoiler alert: he doesn’t.
• CONFESSION TIME! She starts crying when he gets to the “Reestablishment is coming for you, they’re coming to take you back” part. This is pretty reasonable, but he doesn’t pause to reassure her about it before he’s like, “Oh yeah and about your SISTER–” At this point she actually asks him to stop, probably so she can digest some of this horrifying information, but he says, and I quote, “No.” I really feel like he could have paused for a few minutes to let her process, maybe find some solid ground to stand on(since the man whose lap she is sitting in is a spineless moron and awful boyfriend, and thus not at all likely to be of any assistance).
• Juliette panics. Again, this is not entirely unjustified. Aaron speaks seven languages, none of which are “reassurance,” or “comfort,” and so when she actually gets up and runs away he just…accepts it. I want a refund. I want the first three books to apologize for love-bombing me. I made this man my #1 book boyfriend of all time. THIS Aaron Warner…this man is a fraud and I hate him. She should honestly just hook up with Kenji. At least he still calls her princess. Has Aaron called her love even once in this book? It’s possible I missed it, over the sound of his ceaseless letdowns from Chapter One onward.
• Aaron has a panic attack. Luckily his nemesis Kenji is there to comfort him. Why is no one worried about Juliette? While we are all crying over Warner’s psychosomatic breakdown, she is hysterical, hallucinating poison, has a voice in her head, and is being hunted by some kind of evil bureaucrats and possibly her own parents.
• Allow me to share yet another passage that made blink in disbelief:

He [Kenji] shakes his head. “You just can’t, man. You can’t be with someone and keep that many secrets from them.”
“It’s never stopped me before.”

At this point, Mafi, I already hate him. You did not need to include this passage, at all.

• **PARAPHRASING** Kenji’s like, “Hey man, you’re kind of being shitty to your girlfriend by not telling her about things like all your exes.” Aaron is like, “Well, I wouldn’t have ever done anything to hurt her (barring all those things I did to hurt her), but since I already lost her, who cares? Water under the bridge!” To which Kenji reminds him that ‘water under the bridge’ means Juliette can go out and fuck someone else, and Aaron doesn’t like the idea of that, so he decides he probably wants to fix things, after all.
• Aaron: “You couldn’t have called, Lieutenant? Isn’t that what our phones are for?”

Nothing significant here, although it is news to me that they have phones. When did they get phones?
Anyway, turns out Delalieu tried to call him, but Warner disconnected his phone. Can we like, demote this guy or something? This guy SUCKS.

• Juliette chooses the moron’s escape route (blind sprint into the open night), and gets snatched up by Jazeera (who can fly). This is the first time Jazeera has shared said secret with anyone, which she confides when they land in a tree. It’s a really great time for these two to kiss, and it’s only fair. After all, Warner never had any friends, so this childhood friend of Warner’s technically doesn’t count. Juliette lets Aaron block her blessings once again, but Jazeera is nonetheless more emotional support than Kenji and Aaron put together. You know, I usually read fantasy to ESCAPE the disappointing reality of Men. This book is reminding me they manage to infiltrate even sacred spaces like fiction. Jazeera is sucking on a hard candy, and I’M turned on, but Juliette is sad, so I’ll be quiet.
• Jazeera tells Juliette that Warner isn’t a bad person. Unfortunately, I must disagree. She’s still hot so I’m still listening.
• Lena Mishken? Yeah, no, never heard of her, but once again thank the gods for Jazeera, who spills the tea. It is…entirely embarrassing that since-revoked #1 fictional boyfriend Aaron Warner would let this information have to come to his girlfriend through a near stranger’s gossip, but turns out Lena is Aaron’s EX-GIRLFRIEND. I wonder how he could forget to mention a thing like that. Maybe Good Guy Aaron Warner didn’t anticipate she would still be part of the global, troubled teen Brady Bunch they’ve all been part of since they were kids, who are all apparently coming to visit. I’m not sure why he didn’t anticipate this, and I’m also not sure why all these people are showing up for this “Continental Symposium.” Symposiums typically involve presentations of some sort, that is the extent of my knowledge. I am sure if that was the case here, Warner would conveniently forget to remind his girlfriend about it. I am truly convinced at this point he gets off on humiliating her, so he’ll really enjoy making her walk on stage unprepared for something like this. I personally preferred when he was firmly ddlg/cgl coded in books 1-3. Uhhh, I would have appreciated a tw for this kind of content rebranding, but no matter.
• Did I mention Lena and Aaron were together for TWO YEARS?
• Did I mention Lena and Aaron only broke up EIGHT MONTHS AGO?
• Did I mention the Reestablishment is planning to destroy Sector 45?
• Also Lena is Russian. That seemed arbitrary, unless we are just supposed to know she’s extra hot or something. I don’t think Juliette needed any more tearing down, actually, but duly noted!
• Lena shows up outside of Warner’s room. Let me include this tiny snippet from his POV:

“Open the door, asshole.”
“You never did hold back with the flattery.”

Okay, this second line is what I would consider ‘flirting’ and I don’t like that. Good thing I decided I cannot stand this man like, twenty chapters ago, so at least this isn’t anything unexpected by now. This character is utterly irredeemable to me, and I wish I could act like I didn’t cry about it, but I can’t. I am devastated by the character assassination that took place in this book.

• Next up, Lena is attacking him because he broke up with her through a letter to his mom. Nothing surprises me at this point. Also, there is this:

She’s still thrashing against me, landing several kicks at my shins when I finally manage to gentle her arms and pull her close.

Suddenly, she stills.
My lips are at her ear when I say her name once, very gently.

This is an...awfully intimate way to subdue your ex-girlfriend. This would end any relationship in its tracks, for me. Also Kenji is here watching this all happen. He will not say a word to Juliette about it, if my guess is correct.
Why…did the author do this? I am literally sick to my stomach. This is worse than never getting a fourth book. I am really so hurt.

• Juliette has gone 2009 Britney and shaved her head. I really cannot take anymore humiliation of this protagonist who spent two and a half books learning how to make eye contact with other human beings and is now being torn down and betrayed by every single person she has ever cared about.
• For some reason Kenji and Warner walk in at this point. She is obviously wrecked and in her underwear, with a half shaven head. It’s nice to confirm that Kenji has sided with Warner in the breakup. This is the most debasing experience for me. Like I was really here for the found family and learning how to trust in love tropes. I wish I had never opened this one, to be quite honest.
• Warner talks to Juliette like she is a small, crippled animal (she is, essentially, and I would call this at least 75% his fault, but moving on). She is pathetic and drunk and we’ve all been there and I do not want to listen to her idolize her piece of shit boyfriend she broke up with but will get back with in the morning. She begs him to stay and hold her and he obviously can’t do that and still play the victim so he goes to the living room. I am honestly sick to my stomach.
• Warner has some “woe-is-me” inner monologue that I skim because I hate him with a burning passion at this point.
• Juliette wakes up and is, predictably humiliated. Now she has to go in front of all these terrible rich snobby assholes after manic shaving her head bald the night before. The author attempts to turn it into a big empowering moment, but this simply is not realistic as the author has just spent the entirety of the book tearing down and crippling every shred of confidence this girl gained over the course of the first three books.
• Lena is transphobic. That is an odd detail. Moving on.
• Warner tells Juliette he likes her hair. She asks him why he didn’t mention Lena. He tells her it “wasn’t a real relationship.” He tells her it was “purely physical.” The only explanation at this point is that the author did not want to write another book, but then she continued o write books after this so…I have no idea why she destroyed this man’s character so meticulously. I am honestly at a loss for words.
• Juliette is reasonably upset about this, and Warner launches into explanations and excuses for why he doesn’t think before he speaks or consider her feelings the way he did when he was trying to steal her away from Adam. Like, at this point it is safe to say Adam Kent was telling the truth, despite the fact that he also sucks very hard.
• He’s like “blah blah before you I never wanted to get close to anyone.” Well you clearly had no problem getting CLOSE to her, but you also refuse to be emotionally vulnerable with Juliette, so all of this is useless rabble and he is just a narcissist trying to win back a girl who will probably forgive him at the end of the day, to her own undoing. He says some lies and then ends with, “Give me another chance. Please. I swear on my life I won’t disappoint you.” Yes, yes, this is what they always say. If you keep refusing he’ll promise to go to therapy, too, Juliette, this is a universal experience and not the one any of us wanted when we cracked open this book. He kisses her after that and it’s special because it’s in front of all these people he’s been humiliating her in front of for like however many days it’s been now.
• After their kiss, Juliette runs away for…I don’t know. Theater?
• Castle shows up and pretends to be a father figure to Aaron, for some reason. I don’t like him so I don’t care to elaborate.
• Juliette stands at a podium and gives a speech about what she wants to make better in the world and nobody wants that so a bunch of people in the crowd advance on her and she gets shot in the forehead but she’s invincible somehow. Once the first bullet doesn’t do anything they all start shooting. It’s okay because she screams and kills 554 people, which may or may not have been real, I’m not really following at this point. She runs through all her old friends, most of whom she’s just killed, and then a couple greet her and tell her they’re her parents and they’ve come to take her home.
• Warner’s POV is blank. He’s probably still alive. Who cares? He’s ruined either way.
• Juliette wakes up in a child’s bedroom. Spoiler alert: it’s hers. She starts snooping and finds a letter from Warner’s dad about how they’ve found a suitable family for her (she is obviously the “her”). She finds photos of her and her sister before school, then photos of her, her sister, and Nazeera. Oh yeah, then she finds a photo of her and Aaron together as kids. Her real name is Ella.

This is all good and fine, the plot twist was even cool. But there is literally no salvaging what was done to Aaron Warner’s character or his relationship with Juliette in this book. Like, what was the point? I literally have cried way too many times about this and I thought reading it a second time would convince me I am being dramatic or embellishing the level of betrayal I feel but no, like, I am certain this was devastating.

DISCLAIMER: I did not transcribe this myself, though I could. I had a machine do it, and then the machine threw up afterwards -- but I did go through and add some bullety points while Jamie shot off her mouth. It's a total word salad, but one has only to skim through and see the number of ways she yawns and yawps and contradicts herself ... and does not take a breath, so there is very little punctuation. Again it's a run-on slog and the AI program chose to only use periods to end 70-some sentences because of all the run-on "like ... you know ... and ... but" instances as she ran with it -- with NO BOUNDARIES WHATSOVER. I did take out the kids' names, and I did search-and-replace all instances of "to" with "tuh" because that IS how they talk!
ENJOY -- and I use that word lightly:
AND SO IT BEGINS WITH Doug wishing Happy Mother's Day … and immediately Jamie corrects him, "Well, not really Mother's Day …" since they are recording after Mother's Day. Got get those Doug corrections in toot sweet, lest he thinks he has a mind of his own.
They note they tend to be "a little late on things," but they are "trying to get better about that." Doug says they had a fantastic Mother's Day, and he asked her if she had a good time. She said she had a great time. Doug wrote Happy Mother's Day on some cards and the kids drew on them. He gave her an eyelash waxing and noted probably a bad idea. She said it wasn't that she wasn't thrilled as she did mention that pregnancy makes her eyebrows bushy, but she was scared, maybe just mentioned she'd need to tweeze, but oh, well, yes, she likes his gift.
Jamie noted that it was "just the four of us" and of course, the babies in her belly, and that was fine with her – until her son's birthday of course, when she noted that their entire families suck!
So onto her son's birthdays and THESE GEMS AND THOUGHTS: I think it's just pregnancy hormones, but honestly, like, I just, I just can't, like, I don't know why, like, I guess, like, you know, ever since I was little, I've always really, really wanted family, like, so badly, like, I wanted just, like, deep connections with people who truly love me, and I truly love them, and we just really, truly support each other, and just, I don't know, I think, like, just pregnancy hormones made me think about it, but, like, yesterday for Son's birthday, and just family members who just completely forgot, and they just don't care, and I'm like, is it me? Is it him?
Like, and I don't want my son tuh grow, like, he doesn't know, and he'll never know, because I'll make sure, I mean, I spent every second, that boy had no second tuh think yesterday, like, I picked him up from school, and I took him tuh the library, because that's where he wanted tuh go, and then we, like, you know, we really love surprises in this family, if that's not clear by now, and so Daughter and I surprised him with a splash pad, like, we went tuh the splash pad for the first time, and we never do things like that on a school night, and so, and then he got tuh go pick out a cake that he wanted, and then Doug had dinner already at home, and then also we had decorations in his bedroom, which I was, like, hoping tuh have for the morning, but then Doug was, like, at, like, midnight, when we're, like, thinking about starting tuh blow up the balloons, Doug is like, Jamie, let's just surprise him tomorrow after school.

(Notice she takes no breath … and also they were super-last minute when it came tuh getting ready for his birthday, versus, what we have all mentioned, that isn't so when it's a gender reveal or a party or pickleball or something FOR HER.)
HERE, DOUG ASKS … "WHY, ARE WE GONNA DO THIS NOW?" AND THIS WAS PRETTY MUCH THE LAST EFFORT HE MADE tuh STOP HER BECAUSE SHE WENT ON WITH: Yeah, because it was so late, but I was like, I just have, like, this vision that I just wanted for him, because, you know, I'm just trying tuh give them the childhood that, like, I would have wanted, that any little kid would want, and really all that involves is truly just two loving parents who are there, and, like, that's really all that really involves, but if I can go a little extra, you know, and surprise him, and I, then I want to, you know, and so, you know.
DOUG NOTES THAT HE DOESN'T THINK THEY KNOW ANY DIFFERENT, AND HE CONTINUES WITH: I don't think they really know any different, you know, and I know, I know it's, it's tough, and I think, especially with, like, little kids, you know, they, they won't necessarily feel the impact and that want, you know, and, and I know that you do, and it, it hurts me that, you know, you would, you would want people tuh care enough to, tuh reach out, and I think, you know, for, for me, I, that's, I don't really set my expectations or, or give those expectations tuh son and daughter.
JAMIE BLASTS BACK, SUPER-DEFENSIVELY: Oh, I do not either, though. I do not at all. I don't say a thing tuh them about anything, because, you know, sometimes people miss their – you know, and that happens sometimes, but when it's, like, over, and over, and over again, and, like, it's just so obvious, and, and people ask us why we moved tuh Florida, and don't we want tuh be near family, and, you know, tuh be very honest, this is why.
Like, we, you know, I, we would fly up there tuh try tuh prove, like, hey, listen, we're not just trying tuh leave, though. Like, we, we, I want that family connection so badly with your family, with my family, and it's just, you know, unfortunately, it's, people are in different stages of life. I try tuh make excuses, like, for them, and, you know, for us, and it's probably not personal, but the point of the matter is, is that whether it's not personal, and people are busy, and whatever the case may be, we don't have that family connection.
We just don't, and I'm, I try tuh nurture it, and, um, you know, and we do with some family members, and then just others, you know, you just, it's just. Well, you can't help but be disappointed. Yeah, and, like, I guess my heart hurts, because I want our son, and our daughter, and our children tuh have just so many people who love them, and want tuh be around them, and who will encourage them, and support them, and.
DOUG NOTES THAT HE THINKS FAMILY KNOW ALL OF THIS AND THAT THEY, THE KIDS KNOW HOW MUCH LOVE THEY HAVE FOR THEM, AND ALL THE EFFORTS THEY PUT FORTH, AND HERE HE SAYS, "Especially you," AND THAT ALL OF THIS IS WHAT MATTERS MOST.
JAMIE'S REBUTTAL: Yeah, I know, but Doug, what I'm trying tuh say is that, like, what I would want for them is them tuh have many people who love them, and, like, you know, like, I always wanted, you know, it's not even a secret, like, way back, I'm married at first, like, the one thing I wanted was tuh marry into a family, like, a big loving family that would welcome me as their own, and, and I'm really thankful for your family, and, yeah, but, like, I just feel like, like, I want that for our kids. Like, I wanted them tuh have people who loved them, who wanted tuh come around them.
Like, my, my siblings and I really didn't have many aunts or uncles or grandparents who, I mean, you know, it's kind of, it's so long, because, like, there are some people who were there, but it was, like, toxic, and aye, aye, aye, it's just, you know, it's just, at the end of the day, I'm pregnant, and it's just hormones, and I know our kids feel nothing but loved, but it's just really evident, like, on a birthday or holidays, like, people who, who actually, like, family who actually truly cares for us, and, like, all I've ever wanted was just our, like, I, I don't know why I care about these people caring about me, when, like, they don't care, and it's okay, and that's, that's, it's okay.
Like, it, I'm trying so hard tuh just be, like, accept it, girl. Like, you know, you can't force family tuh love you.
JAMIE TRIES TO DIFFUSE THE TIMEBOMB SITUATION THAT IS HIS WIFE, CLEARLY GOING OFF ON EVERYBODY BY SAYING HE KNOWS THAT SHE DOESN'T WANT THIS FOR THEM BUT THAT THEY, THE KIDS, DON'T EVEN NOW ABOUT ALL OF THIS RIGHT NOW.
JAMIE'S REBUTTAL: Well, I know they don't, and so, at the end of the day, I was, like, sitting in bed crying earlier, and I was, like, what is wrong with me, because I know my son had a great birthday yesterday. Like, I made sure of it.
DOUG NOTES SHE "KILLED IT, YESTERDAY."
JAMIE BLASTS ON: At the end of the day, I think, like, it's a personal thing, because it's, like, they don't care about me, and therefore, they don't care about my son, and that hurts, you know? Like, it's just hurtful, and not, because I care about them, and I love them, and I've tried so hard tuh be part of them, and, and try to, like, I've tried changing my ways. I've tried tuh adapt tuh be more like them.
I've tried all these different things. At the end of the day, nothing I do, like, I may as well just be myself, and, and, because if I have tried tuh be like them, they don't like me. If I try tuh be myself, they don't like me.
Like, no matter what, like, I don't feel like, I feel like they're, I'm just kind of judged by them in the way that I live my life, and anyways, it's fine, but.
DOUG COUNTERS IT WITH THE FACT THAT JAMIE GOES "ABOVE AND BEYOND FOR EVERYBODY," AND THAT IT'S TOUGH THAT SHE "WANTS OR EXPECTS THAT IN RETURN," BUT NOTES THAT THIS IS ALSO MAYBE WHERE THE "BOUNDARIES" LIE … cool, they now have a title for the podcast!
JAMIE CONTINUES tuh BLAST: Well, no, of course, and this is exactly why I'm also crying happy tears, because for so long, I just really tried tuh nurture, like, a true, like, true family, and deep connection, and like, try tuh be, like, really close, and, and it's like, well, if you're the only person nurturing that, you're bound tuh get hurt. It's bound, it's not going tuh happen ever, because it has tuh be a two-way street, and so, unfortunately, like, I started putting up boundaries, and I knew it was going tuh hurt, and like, here it is. It's, it's hurting, you know, like, and then inevitably, they'll be like, you know, you moved tuh Florida, but even when we didn't live in Florida, let's be honest, like, we didn't see family very often, unless, like, it was, it just, unless it was us going places, and then even when we moved here, I would fly up there.
I flew up, we were flying up there, like, once a month. It was so expensive. It was so taxing, but I just wanted to, tuh kind of prove, hey, listen, like, but, you know, I'm so glad we moved here, because at the end of the day, you know, even if we never even find our own people, like, our focus is on our core family, like, we had zero distractions for Son yesterday, like, his birthday was the hundred, like, and it's just, that feels good, because normally, we wouldn't have that. Yeah, normally, I would be cleaning the house, trying tuh prep for people tuh come over, who I would have called 10 times, make sure they remember that he's coming, and it's like, or that his birthday is coming, and it's like, it's just, you know, this is such a vulnerable, I don't even know if I want tuh share any of this, because it's just so personal, but.
DOUG NOTES THAT ALL REFLECTS MORE ABOUT OTHERS AND NOT AN ATTACK ON JAMIE.
AND YET JAMIE CONTINUES TO DEFLECT AND ATTACK: No, I don't think it is either, but it's just very evident where people, like, if people care about us and our family, I don't think they actually, that's the thing, is they don't, like, and so, they're not thinking about it one way or the other, it doesn't even matter tuh them, and that's what hurts, because I wish that they cared about us the way that we cared about them, but they don't, and so, that's why I'm trying tuh have the boundaries tuh be like, find people who will care about you then, or just focus on your own family, and if people wonder why I want so many kids, well, there you go. People constantly say, why don't you love the two you have?
Oh, of course I do, and I'll tell you what, I want tuh have 10 more, because I want tuh raise them in a way where we love each other, we're always there for each other, we don't forget. It's just silly little milestones, it's not about presents, it's not about anything other than just love, and remembrance, and just, like, celebrating each other, and I am going tuh raise my kids tuh just really love each other, and tuh know that their parents love them, but God forbid, one of us are taken, and then, then it's like, I think about things like that, and I'm like, who do they have if they don't have us? Like, seriously, and that scares the crap out of me, because there are very few people who even remember, like, and tuh me, it's just a birthday, I know, it doesn't really matter, but like, that's of significance tuh that child, and people just don't care, like, they just, our fam, so many of our family members just don't care. Well, we make, we make it, and then I'm like, am I making a mountain out of a molehill, but like, and am I?
DOUG ALSO THINKS ABOUT THEM "DEPARTING EARLY" AND WHAT HAPPENS tuh THEM.
JAMIE BUSTS BACK IN, AND STARTS tuh TALK ABOUT "ESTATE PLANNING," WHICH SORT OF MADE ME SIDEYE BECAUSE SHE GOES ON tuh TALK ABOUT THE KIDS AND WHAT WOULD HAPPEN TO THEM, AS IF THEY WERE PART OF THE "ESTATE," BUT I GUESS SINCE THEY ARE THE MONEYMAKERS SHE THINKS OF IT MORE IN THAT WAY THAN GUARDIANSHIP PAPERWORK … AND SO SHE CONTINUES: Well, when you think about estate planning, and then who you're leaving your kids to, and I'm like, who can I leave my kids to, who are really going tuh love them, and the people right now didn't even call tuh wish him happy birthday, they didn't even call tuh wish him a happy birthday, they didn't send a gift, and it's not even about the gift, but it's about the thought, who do we have in our life, Doug? I don't think it's, you know, I ask if I think I'm making a mountain out of a molehill, but then I, like, I almost, like, talk, like, convince myself that, no, I'm not, like, I'm really trying tuh make sure that our kids are taken, like, loved and taken care of, and sure, we've got it out, down pat, but what happens, like, then what?
And like, I'm not gonna go down that rabbit hole, and I'm sure this is all pregnancy hormones, and I'm just exhausted and tired, so, but I just think about these things, and then, and then people wonder why I am so thankful for our followers, for those of you listening tuh the podcast, and those of you who follow us on Instagram and YouTube, and who are just excited for us, because a lot of our own family members aren't, like, it's just wild, and so, yeah, and so thank you for those of you listening, and for those of you who comment, and just, you know, just are excited to, like, like, tuh be part of our family, like, because we have forever been looking for that, and, like, our family's just not that interested, and we could try, and try, and try.
DOUG: Out of sight, out of mind.
JAMIE BINGOS!!!!! THAT THOUGHT AND CONTINUES: Yeah, it's, and it's fine, but I'll tell you what, I genuinely do appreciate every single five-star review, every single, like, nudge that you just, every single moment that you take out of your life just tuh be like, hey, what's up with Jamie, you know, and that's why I try tuh do giveaways, and I try to, you know, like, read your five-star reviews, and I try tuh show you that I genuinely care about you, too, because I really think that it is a two-way street with everything in life, like, so whether it's, you know, family, it's friends, it's working, it's, we're colleagues, like, if someone is showing you a lot of, you know, any support, or encouragement, or care, like, then that's the person that you should then go show love, support, and encouragement, and care to, whether they're family or not, and unfortunately, if family doesn't seem tuh show you that, well, then you do have tuh set up boundaries, and it hurts, like, h-e-l-l, because then you'll start to, when you stop reaching out as much, well, then you'll start seeing that your relationship becomes even more distant, but you can't constantly break your back tuh try tuh make relationships.
DOUG NOTES THAT THEY EITHER STEP UP OR DON'T, AND THAT’S WHERE IT LANDS.
JAMIE CONTINUES: Yeah, but from what, from my experience, from what we've experienced, you know, no one really steps up, and it's pretty evident when you start, when you realize you have tuh make a boundary with a person, like, just know in your heart that it's gonna hurt, like, you know, and I'm sure that we're, I'm not the only person going through this, and that's, I think, why it's important tuh share, is that, you know, because it's hard tuh share these things.
It's embarrassing. It's, I feel, it's almost, like, belittling. It's like, like, you know, it's like you're, you're sharing that you're rejected, essentially.
Who wants tuh share that? Like, who wants tuh admit that? But the truth is, is that we all have been there, and so I think that the biggest way tuh heal, and what I've learned is, of course, tuh find, to, like, lean in on the people who don't, like, desert you, betray you, talk behind your back.
I mean, that's the thing, is people who also, who are there, but they're really, like, kind of a snake in disguise, and, like, it's, like, like, they, it seems like they're there for you, but then behind, but you're walking on eggshells around them, because you know that they're saying things behind your back, and that's not, that's not healthy either, and so what I've really tried tuh do is really just focus on people that have really just been loving and nurturing, and the more people are loving and nurturing tuh me, whether they're family or not, the more I will lead, like, reach into them, and...
DOUG BUSTS IN TO TAKE A "QUICK PAUSE" FOR AN AD, IRONICALLY ABOUT INVESTING AND GOOD FINANCIAL HYGEINE.
JAMIE GETS RIGHT BACK TO IT: Of course, holidays and birthdays are tough because like you want like my mom like I mean forget it but like I love her and she's doing the best she can but like you know it's like I don't know I guess it's because I'm pregnant and then like when you become a mom and you just think about this relationship and it's like I just have always wanted that relationship with my mom and of course I know real like logically it's not gonna happen but anyways it's um it's just hard but anyways what I was trying tuh say tuh you though listening is like if you're going through this type of situation like just know that you're doing the right thing by kind of putting the boundaries up and then kind of you know you got tuh focus on gratitude more than anything else and so I consistently try tuh remind myself tuh be thankful that I am alive I'm able tuh be there for my kids my son has no idea who remembered and who forgot his birthday but of course he knows who he talked tuh but like you know I, I know that he had the most spectacular day yesterday and I made darn well sure of it and it literally cost me like zero dollars tuh it's not like it has tuh be expensive it wasn't extravagant we went tuh the library which is free and then we went tuh a free splash pad that's in our city and slash playground yeah, yeah and he had a great time so it's like people it's because the other thing people say well if you can afford tuh give them that it's like it doesn't you can find ways tuh live tuh like really bless your family and your kids without having tuh spend boatloads of money um but the biggest message and takeaway of this all and I guess of like I we never planned on sharing any of this we were planning on sharing about mother's day and
DOUG DOESN'T EVEN KNOW WHAT tuh SAY, BUT SHE NEEDS tuh KNOW HOW PROUD HE IS OF HER, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH …
SHE THANKS HIM QUICKLY AND THEN GETS ON WITH HIS always getting by my side and like when I'm thankful for you when I started you know going tuh therapy and, and I mean forever ago I'm telling you forever ago when we were first married and I first started going tuh a therapist outside of married at first sight she told me she looked me in the eyes and she said Jamie like they might be family but they're not your people and you gotta go find your people and I didn't want tuh believe her I didn't want I literally just said you know thanks but no thanks essentially and I'm gonna try my best tuh turn this family into mine because I want this connection and I want this and I wish I could have saved myself all those years by just listening tuh her and you know finding my own people who, who do love and support me for who I am who I don't have tuh like I can just don't have tuh walk on eggshells I don't have tuh try tuh be anybody else I can just be myself and they'll see like the good in that and they'll like it you know and, and not everyone's for everyone and that's okay and I just try tuh remind myself that but anyways um yeah you've always stood by my side so thank you I see you I'll always be by your side I just like sometimes doubt like if like you know like, like, like what have I done like am I a bad person like did I like what have I done this has nothing
DOUG NOTES THAT THEY'D FIND PEOPLE "DOWN HERE" IN FLORIDA, AND THAT THEY BOTH KNEW IT WOULD NOT HAPPEN OVERNIGHT, THAT REALLY MEANINGFUL BONDS TAKE TIME, BUT THEY ARE IN THE BEST POSSIBLE POSITION TO BUILD A COMMUNITY AND MAKE STRONG FRIENDS THEY CONSIDER TO BE FAMILY, AMAZING PEOPLE, AND THERE ARE KIDS TOO, AND THEY CAN WATCH EVERYONE GROW UP TOGETHER … AND HE THINKS, "That's kind of the point of, of moving tuh Florida find community find our people and also find out you know who would be there with us and for us and …"
JAMIE BLASTS BACK: It has nothing tuh do with you or who you are well the truth is, is obviously it does because these people don't enjoy being around me so then therefore they don't enjoy remembering our kids and or me whatever I guess I think I'm just really hormonal and emotional but I guess I just feel incredibly rejected and like I've done something wrong but I also know at the same exact breath that this has been happening for years and years and years where I've really
DOUG NOTES JAMIE HAS "TRIED SO HARD" AND THAT IT'S NOTHING THAT SHE DID.
JAMIE BLATHERS BACK THAT IT'S NOT REALLY THAT THEY'VE DONE ANYTHING WRONG, BUT … we just don't jive and I guess you know we have different we're different people and we can't force it yeah and so there's very little control that we have over it other than us being us yeah and so but you know but I guess this is like the healing part that everyone talks about with boundaries that's so painful like it's so painful because when you want something so bad and like I think it's like wired in me because it's family and like I really want tuh support family and love family and be there for them and but then it's like but it's just not there in return and you could just spend your whole life searching for it and or you could kind of put up a boundary and, and stop allowing that tuh continue tuh hurt you and find people who are genuinely happy tuh be around you and so needless tuh say for those of you listening if - if you're in this boat with someone whether it's parents siblings aunts uncles cousins I don't know or even long-time friends who you think are quote-unquote friends but you know things change or who knows I mean it's so darn hurtful but I really believe at the end of the day that I mean I was I spent years and years and years trying my darnedest and now I'm like if I, If I could give like an inkling of that effort tuh someone who gives an inkling of the effort back tuh me like the just the joy and happiness that could come from that or just like the stability and also like I did try changing myself tuh kind of be more like them tuh have more in common with them and it just I can tell you right now if you're trying tuh do that that's not gonna work either like it's hard unfortunately you just gotta be yourself in this world you gotta love with your whole heart and, and be selfless you know you can't expect people tuh just care about you if you don't care about them of course you gotta show up for people you gotta really like put yourself out there for them but if you consistently do that and you're not getting any of it in return you gotta change your path and it's the hardest thing in the world tuh do but you know tuh be very, very honest like going tuh bed with Doug last night after Son's birthday and like just everything that went down and whatnot I was just like and this is why we live in Florida this is why we moved here because this this served our core family more so than trying tuh fit a round peg into a square everyone else's schedule and everybody else's lives it's just you know and it's and I'm incredibly thankful tuh your sister and tuh your mom and your dad of course because they did reach out and that's just really, really kind like they called and they just show that they really care and that really means the whole wide world tuh me and like regardless of what they think of me like they love our kids and that's really all that
DOUG NOTES WHAT MATTERS IS-AND MAYBE THEY NEED TO BELIEVE IN SOME KIND OF "HIGHER PURPOSE," BUT HE DOESN'T CONSIDER IT ALL "WASTED TIME OR ENERGY," AND THAT IT MAYBE HAPPENED THE WAY IT'S SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN AND FOR JAMIE TO GIVE …
AND SHE CUTS HIM OFF TO SAY THAT THIS MESSAGE CAN help others. I've really kind of like avoided being this vulnerable lately because I feel like there are some people who just really don't like me and it's been brought tuh my attention and just no matter what I do they really don't like me and I guess like everybody has quote-unquote haters but it hurts my heart a little bit and I don't know but, but the truth is, is like just like I said before what I learned in this the certain boundaries that I've talked about before is that you really can't change who you are in the hopes that people will start tuh approve of you because they're never like the people who just choose that they don't like you and they just choose tuh find your faults will always like they will always see your faults and they will always yeah there's no convincing them otherwise and that's and if you're listening tuh this like this is the truth for all of us is that when you're looking for the good in life you're gonna find the good and you can focus on that and try tuh get like more of that and garner more of that but if you're focused on the negative whether it's in life or with your spouse or with a friend or at the workplace you're gonna find that and so if so sometimes if you've you know if you see that you're consistently feeling like you have quote-unquote bad luck or that this person's being wrong tuh you or they're not caring about you will try tuh think about the good that they do and, and, and so truly like for me with these whole boundary things like I've tried just I tried tuh kind of I've already tried that with some of these family members that just don't seem tuh care and um and, and so that's and then that's when the hurt comes is you know when you realize oh yeah you're actually all right and you are onto something and for whatever reason their life isn't aligning with yours and it's and that's okay but it doesn't mean it's not gonna hurt a little bit for the person who like wants it tuh be there but that's when you go out and find someone who wants tuh align their life with you or maybe their life already aligns and they just and you can serve each other you can love each other you can be there for each other and whether it's blood related or not like that will serve you better in life and so that's kind of where I think Doug and I are right now um but also for, for you listening if, if you're just finding yourself in this situation too just try tuh make sure you're not just trying tuh find the fault in someone because you don't want tuh get caught in that rabbit hole and there are people out there who just want tuh find the negative and then there are people out there who cut that down like don't allow that tuh happen tuh yourself because you will be miserable your whole life hating on someone else and just constantly finding their faults and constantly complaining about them is never going tuh bring you true happiness it really isn't and so think about you know yourself and like what you can do differently and try tuh bring the positive and so yeah I haven't been as vulnerable lately because it's been hard tuh be very honest tuh just share like my heart and then people are just going tuh attack me for it you know I'm sure but um but my goal in sharing this if we end up sharing this is that it helps the one person out there or I'm sure several really who are in the same exact boat who are you know trying tuh keep a friend that they've had forever but that friend's just not there or trying tuh maintain a relationship with one of your parents or your siblings or it shouldn't be hard it shouldn't be and you shouldn't have tuh change who you are and if you do then that's really just not the right person for you and, and you can talk tuh them about it of course and then if they're just combative, at the end of the day, I just say the best advice is find a therapist, and this book called Boundaries, and it's a little religious, and also a little kind of like, whoa, but I'm telling you, Chapter One, just give it – if you don’t' like it after that, don't even try, but like Chapter One, I was like, wow, I can see so much of myself in this, and I can see how could change, and I've got tuh promise you that it's been hurt along the way, but I have – we have, and our family has more positive days now than stressful, trying tuh like pull people in who don't really want tuh be there, trying tuh help them remember because they're gonna forget, like it's just – like yesterday was like the least stressful day ever, and we didn't have one person coming tuh our – or even Mother's Day, it was just us four, and you know, before I had kids, and I think – I saw someone else write this, but like before I had kids, I looked at the world as like everyone I encountered, and how can I be helpful tuh them, and that – like, but now it's like my world is my husband and my children. My world is within my four walls, and how do I love them and support them the best that I possible can, tuh help them become good – eventually like good husbands, a good wife, good mothers, good fathers, and good, good family members, and so …
DOUG IS SO PROUD OF HER AND THINKS SHE SHOULD ALSO BE PROUD OF HERSELF BECAUSE OF "HOW MUCH YOU HAVE GROWN FROM PEOPLE STARTING TO COMMENT ON SOCIAL MEDIA, AND YOU TRYING TO BRING THEM BACK OVER TO YOUR SIDE TO RECOGNIZING THE TOXICITY OF IT, AND SETTING BOUNDARIES." HE HAS TO TELL HER THAT IN THE PAST COUPLE OF YEARS, SHE HAS "SPREAD MORE POSITIVITY, IN MY MIND, THAN ANYBODY, FOCUSING ON BEING THANKFUL AND GRATEFUL," AND A MESSAGE SHE IS PASSING ONTO THE KIDS WHO ARE REALLY STARTING tuh THINK ABOUT IT AND FOCUS ON IT, AND IT'S "DRIVEN BY YOU."
MORE RASPY WHINY TEARY VOICE: Oh, Gosh, Doug's that's the nicest comment that I could have ever received because I really want that for them … yeah, because I – because we could all fall into that where you see the negative and you just kind of focus on that, and I'm trying so hard not to, and tuh just – you know, pray more, and even meditate, and that has nothing tuh do with prayer, but like just rewire my brain tuh like the positive things and finding the positive and helping others, also because – honestly, and I want tuh raise my kid where they are not seeing the negative, they're seeing the positive in situations because life, regardless of who loves you, how much money you have, what home you live in, what car you drive, life is so much better when you're able tuh see the positive and you're able to, like lean into that more, and you're able tuh then attract people who are like that, and the Negative Nellies are just going tuh always be there talking their smack about you, and that's fine, but like, if you can find the positive, you can focus on that, and you're going tuh have such a happier life, and the Negative Nellies, unfortunately, like I still pray for them, I still hope for them, because it's sad – like they're not living a happy life. You can't be a hater tuh all these people and be happy. It's sad.
DOUG THINKS THEY ARE "living proof of it, because once we started tuh focus on happy, once we started focusing on being thankful and grateful, the people that we attracted are the people that we would want tuh be with … didn't happen overnight, but as soon as we started tuh rethink that, and really try tuh be positive and do positive things, and our prayers and with the kids and being thankful and finding good, and gratitude, you know, we attracted people into our lives that, you know, are going tuh be there – I mean, I feel these are now lifelong friends, and you know, all of that was attracted, and there has got tuh be something tuh that."
THE END, THEY MUST GO PICK UP THEIR DAUGHTER BUT ONLY AFTER THE FIVE-STAR REVIEW AND THEN "SEE YOU NEXT WEEK!"
DELUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSIONAL – THE BOTH OF THEM! And according to the AI program Jamie talks more than 90 percent of the time, and Dud, hardly ever.

Hi Reddit,
I'm a 35-year-old female, and I’ve had a close and supportive friendship with my best friend, "L" (female, 33), for nine years. Recently, our friendship has become strained due to her boyfriend, now fiancé, who disapproves of me.
I've been married for 11 years, which is not conventional. My husband and I are very supportive of each other and have different interests, so we don’t hang out often except for certain activities. His job also makes our days off different. We’ve had some rough times, but we’re working through them, and no matter what we are always looking out for each other and never stop each other from doing what we love.
Because of my chill, open lifestyle, and bubbly personality, L's fiancé views me as a negative influence on her. even thou i know her way before he did.
Her boyfriend has made derogatory comments about me, which she only mentioned after I pushed her to tell me what was wrong. L and I usually spend much time together because we work together and sometimes go to the gym or grab food after work. On weekends, we do other activities like beach or horse riding, and I had no issue with him joining us. However, after a few times when he joined us at the beach, where I met friends for football and paddle boarding, he started criticizing me and my driving skills and the routes I take. Soon after, he stopped coming with us, and L started acting weird. Eventually, I discovered he had called me a “hoe in an open relationship.” and claimed I did not respect my husband or myself because I was too friendly and attract men, which he thought would ruin his relationship with L.
This situation led to a heated discussion and a temporary break in our friendship. I needed to reconnect with myself, especially because she was always fighting with him whenever she was with me, making me feel like a burden. After a months, I felt okay and resumed communication with her, explaining why I needed a break. However, we significantly reduced our activities together (her choice i guess).
L tried to mend the situation by encouraging my husband and me to socialize with them, hoping to show our positive qualities as a couple. My husband refused after learning about her fiancé’s disrespectful behavior. Honestly, I wasn’t ready to socialize with a hater, either. Her fiancé’s controlling behavior goes beyond his opinions of me. He discourages L’s interests, like singing, and displays other red flags that she seems to overlook (which me & others has motioned) to which she fired back that we are not supportive.
Despite L’s efforts to defend our friendship against her fiancé’s attempts to drive a wedge between us, he wanted her to choose between him and me. She claimed she tried to keep everything that mattered, but I was wrong. After our break, we were good for the next six months, even though we didn’t hang out as much (4 times). Whenever we did, she would fight with him and leave early or without saying goodbye, just leaving a message.
My birthday was approaching, and every year as a tradition, L and I have dinner together to celebrate before having a party with other friends. Two weeks before my birthday, I asked her to attend dinner on Friday or Saturday which my husband was to plan for us, she agreed. Two days later, she asked to confirm if it was happening and where. I said I would let her know once my husband confirmed the plans (this is very normal as i inform her always 1 day before). She kept asking the same question daily, which was unusual for her. Finally, she admitted that her fiancé wanted to leave the city for a few days and needed to know if our plans were confirmed. I canceled so she could go with him, but they didn’t go at the end. and that didn't feel great for me.
A week before my birthday, I asked her and other friends to keep their Sundays open for a pool brunch my husband was planning for us. Everyone, including L, confirmed, and she even added, "Count me in +1," assuming I’d be okay with her bringing her fiancé. I was mad but decided to let it go for her. A few days before the event, she messaged me saying she might be unable to come because she had a minor surgery and couldn’t swim. I was shocked she hadn’t mentioned the surgery before and asked why she didn’t tell me. She replied that she didn’t have to tell me everything and that I didn’t need to come. I was mad and asked if it was because of him. She yelled, accusing me of not understanding how much I hurt her by taking a break and moving on, while she didn’t.
She blamed me and our friends for not being supportive, even though we had helped her in the past. For example, she lived with my husband and me for almost a year rent-free when she was jobless only for 2 months. Her fiancé had issues with most of our group despite our welcoming attitude. She kept making excuses and gaslighting us for not being there for her since she got serious with this guy. I listened and asked how I could make things right. She dared to say "I needed to apologize for taking a break to care for myself and moving on while she didn’t". I calmly refused to apologize for taking care of my mental health, knowing how much I had worked on myself. If she wasn’t okay with that, it was her issue.
She tried to be nice the next day, realizing she messed up, but I was a bit cold with her as I didn’t expect her to say those things, especially knowing how much I cared for her and what I had done for her. The day before my birthday, our friend supposed to pick her up before picking me up. When I came down, she wasn’t there. I asked my friend if she was coming, and he said no. I messaged her, asking if she was coming or not. She said yes, but later, as her fiancé wasn’t ready. We went ahead, and three hours later (the brunch is for 4 hours), they finally showed up. Her fiancé didn’t say a proper hello and started complaining about wanting to sit at a table instead of the poolside beds we had booked. Despite arriving three hours late, she had the nerve to ask me to move to accommodate him. I refused and suggested they sit at the table if they preferred.
I saw them arguing a few times, and she kept coming back and forth between the beds and the table. When dessert was served, I decided to join them at the table to be the bigger person. Her fiancé picked up his phone and didn’t speak to anyone. When he decided to leave, he gestured for her to follow him and walked away without saying goodbye.
That was the last straw for me. She seemed okay with his behavior as if it is normal, and there was no way we could convince her that he was mistreating her. I messaged her, saying I didn’t blame him but blamed her for ruining my day and trying to force us to adjust our boundaries for him. She didn’t acknowledge my message. And the next day, she sent me a message to remove my brother’s car from her parking (the car had been parked there for two years without issue). I removed the car and stopped all communication with her and blocked her everywhere. we work with each other, so we are keeping professional.
FYI: This guy has told her in a message that I saw accidentally. Quote his exact message: "you don’t deserve to be a mother if you associates with this people (AKA - any of us), as we have no values and brings only shame and “cockroaches” to her perfect relationship.
I am disappointed and feel sorry for wasting so much time and effort on someone I never knew, apparently.
I want to make sure that i will not look back. hence am asking advice if you think i wronged her in any way?

I don't even know where to start with this. But please mind I am aware I did/was doing something risky and I am aware I fuqked up. So please, no haters. As time goes on this potential scam gets more complicated and I am so confused.
Anyways, I went into a FB group for Morgan Wallen tickets. I have been dying to go, and I figured I will take a look. I found this guy, who claimed he is a "ticket reseller agent" and that he has 4 tickets for every MW concert. I messaged him, he provided me with the ticket rate and info, and I asked him for proof.
His proof of tickets to me looked EXTREMELY legit. I messaged the moderator of the FB group and he said they were safe. I zelled him, and my payment was under review, and it eventually failed today.
I decided to proceed with Apple Pay since I was flagged on zelle since it was a new account on my end. I knew it was risky, I sent the money from APPLE CASH and it went through. THE STATUS stated that my transaction was complete. This is important to remember.
Time went on, and he was "figuring things out" on his end and that it was processing. A couple hours later the payment was canceled. I received no email regarding this, and I called Apple and they told me that this transaction went through and the recipient has it. They also told me that IF it was processing on his end, it would state that it is processing on my end. It was never processed on my end.
So, I told my concert ticket seller that on my end you have received my money and there is nothing I can do. I contacted the moderator about this and he said he will look into it and he said that "this is bad". I asked if there was anything I could do and he said he could have him arrested (??).
Then suddenly, the ticket sellescammer transferred the tickets to me. He did this out of "good faith" he said. But the email says I do not have access to add the tickets onto my ticketmaster. It says quote "Your ticket isn’t available to be accepted into your Ticketmaster account. Ticket to your event are on hold and not yet released. Because of this policy you won't be able to access your ticket directly into your Ticketmaster account. You should be able to accept your ticket transfer via button above as soon as they are released"
It gets worse. I received a text from "apple" that i will get refunded for my apple pay. I called apple again, and they told me there is no dispute under my transaction and they would never text me information like this.
I apologize for the wrong post. But this is so complicated.

Hey Everyone,
Just wanted to share my experience with others & hopefully share some stories, hopefully.
A while ago I decided to start investigating new career paths, as I am sick of financial services. Id been doing it for nearly a decade and it makes me feel like a bloodsucker. No matter how I try to be a good representative of the industries by helping anyone in any way I can, insurers are the worst.
So, I've taken a sabbatical and look at some career jobs which would let me give back and help the community
I saw an ad and booked a ticket to attend for a general info night to discuss careers with Vic Police. Shortly after, I was told my ticket had been cancelled due to and I quote the following:
"Upon receiving your booking, we have undertaken a review of your applicant profile/background. Whilst we appreciate you are interested in joining Victoria Police, due to the outcome of your security check you will not be permitted to attend the event.
Based on the above circumstances, we have cancelled your ticket to attend the Information Session."
To elaborate I got in trouble when I was a teen, (17 & 18) and one DUI driving offence, well over a decade ago. (I'm now 37 years old.) I got no convictions for the 17 and 18 year old offences.
Has anyone else experienced this? Seems pretty rough of them to make a decision like this, when I've been trying to be the best person I can be and I'm a completely different person now. Turned my life around and created a new life for myself on the straight and narrow.
Just curious to see if anyone experienced the same thing? Luckily I don't particularly want to be a policeman, it was more due to the fact it matched my career test.
FYI: For any haters, I did my community service, took full responsibility for my actions and have been doing everything I can to be better than the day I was before.

For the sake of transparency, I am not the architect of the following discoveries, and am just helping to forward their message and clean it up. Copywrite of the following work belongs to no one and everyone is not only welcome to share these findings as if they were their own, but openly encouraged to do so.
Introduction
If you think you know anything about MAGA. Trust me, you know nothing. Not even his most devout followers or haters will have considered the following. And for the sake of our democracy and way of life, I hope people read this.
This work may very well help to shift the narrative on Trump in a meaningful and foundational way, but I don't want this work exacerbate any feelings of ill will to MAGA members, for they have been prey to possibly one of the largest con jobs our world has ever seen, especially without the help of this counternarrative.
Snippet From My Thesis On MAGA
As I work on tidying up the master file with the helpful dms I got, allow me to post just the most contentious part of it below, now that it’s able to stand on its own.
MAGA didn’t begin in 2015. I argue it began in 2001 on 9/11, while also harnessing and funneling decades of anti-government resentment till many Americans would openly call for a “wrecking ball” figure to help “drain the swamp.”

A Key Fueling Factor To American Outrage- Inflation
Many elements contributed to growing American anger that would later contribute to MAGA, this is a snippet from the larger work.
Rising Cost of Living
o In 1950, the Consumer Price Index (CPI) was 24.1. By 2000, it had risen to 168 (a 597% increase), and by 2023, it had reached 304.7, a 1163% increase from 1950.
o Housing prices saw a drastic rise overtime, with the median home price increasing from $7,354 in 1950 to $388,700 in 2023, a staggering 5185% increase.
o While rising rent costs can contribute to overall inflation and cost of living, even the left has largely failed to address how exponentially increasing real estate prices impact the cost of living. This omission has made many other conspiracy theories seem more plausible in its wake.
o If we don’t find real solutions for real estate that also aren’t extreme, then society will feel more and more pressure to accept “unreasonable solutions” like Trump, even though he’s the last person on earth who could solve it, considering his business acumen and history.
MAGA Dynamics and Blind Devotion
In 2016, it wasn't just the left calling the MAGA movement a cult. Trump famously said, "I could stand in the middle of Fifth Avenue and shoot somebody, and I wouldn't lose any voters." Even the left failed to grasp the gravity of this statement. As someone who nearly died in a deadly cult and based on my research, I don't know of a single cult where the founder could openly commit murder without losing members. Trump didn't just believe he'd created one of the largest cults ever; he believed he'd created the most fanatical. Let's hope his followers prove him wrong by showing a willingness to criticize him, regardless of their vote.

The MAGA Question
Instead of challenging MAGA supporters on fallacious beliefs, ask them this question to see if they’re at least able to see a world where Trump isn’t a biblical King: "If Trump admitted he was behind 9/11 and used resulting insurance money and donations from hostile governments to create false “grass root” campaigns. And did it all in a way to make it seem like others committed his own atrocities. And that he intended to destroy America in every way if he got elected, would you still vote for him?"

Yet even then, getting through to a MAGA supporter inevitably refers to 9/11 “research” out there when they realize individual positions are usually fallacious. This quagmire me decide to investigate this tragedy, to see if there was a more plausible counter theory. Honestly, the more I looked the more surprised I became. Here are my findings that are but a snippet of my full thesis on MAGA.

9/11 Conspiracy Theories and MAGA
Conspiracy Theories and Credibility:
o First off, conspiracy theories should involve some effort to verify narratives, rather than just repeating claims across multiple sources that mistake themselves as evidence; like a bunch of people who repeat “bob farted” across multiple websites may see that as evidence, when in fact, it was Sean. Sorry Sean.

Early Origins of MAGA:
o Although some believe MAGA began in 2015, its roots lie as early as the 1980s with Rush Limbaugh and later became "serious" on 9/11.
o 9/11 conspiracy theories claim controlled demolitions were used, but the lack of any cellphone recordings of explosions weakens this theory.

Suspicious Factors:
o The official narrative involving chaotic jet fuel leading to a straight fall seemed questionable.
o The collapse of a third building (WTC 7), which wasn’t directly hit, fueled suspicions.
o Airline stocks were heavily shorted before the attacks, raising concerns about insider trading. Harvey Pitt, Republican SEC Chairman at the time, investigated this and claimed there was nothing amiss, but was criticized for later crimes and forced to resign.
o It’s also suspicious that in Trumps 2000 book “The America We Deserve” that he stated, “I really am convinced we’re in danger of the sort of terrorist attacks that will make the [1993] bombing of the Trade Center look like kids playing with firecrackers. No sensible analyst rejects this possibility, and plenty of them, like me, are not wondering if but when it will happen*.”*
§ Yet democrats would largely miss this point entirely and obsess over his false claim that he called for Bin Laden to be killed, when he had not. Somehow conspiracy theorists would find this ‘cool’ rather than suspicious.
CNN Fact Check Donald Trump Osama Bin Laden Book Claim

Reports and Simplified Narratives:
o FEMA's 2002 report and NIST's 2005 report provided technical explanations of the tower collapses.
o However, the Port Authority Chairman stuck to the oversimplified narrative that "jet fuel melted steel beams," even though he knew this was a half-truth, as detailed in the next section, fueling anti-government conspiracies. The question is why.

Potential Impact:
o 9/11 conspiracy theories sowed distrust in the government, which may have been one of the attackers' objectives. Anyone that heavily profited from this tragedy, and helped further those objects, should be questioned.
o The ‘Loose Change’ “documentary” pointed out suspicious parts of the story, but failed to give any clear claims as to who was purportedly behind it. It also failed to note the Twin Towers titanic design flaw that could result in a straight fall. Even the 2015 version of this film fails to mention nearly all of the known facts in this report.
o The Director of that film later states:
“I DON’T THINK WE’D HAVE PRESIDENT TRUMP IF IT WEREN’T FOR 9/11”
“9/11 created a culture of fear, of xenophobia, this sense of entitlement and everything we’ve seen. Warrantless wire-tapping, Guantanamo Bay, everything that’s happened led us to this point, we wouldn’t be here without 9/11. They want to kick out all the Mexicans and Muslims because of this culture of fear and bigotry and xenophobia that directly led to the election of fucking Donald Trump. [laughing] That’s our world now! We had Reagan before, and Governor Schwarzenegger. But President Donald Trump? It’s just weird. Everything is just weird.”
Theoutline Reflecting On Loose Change
o While the director was in the right to ask questions, he failed to ask the most obvious ones.
o However, his lead “researcher,” Jason Bermas, would turn out to be a full blown MAGA wingnut.
Patriot Jason Bermas
o Anyone that would benefit politically and financially from 9/11 should be fully investigated.
Further Reading:
Harvey Pitt - Wikipedia
Politifact How 911 Attacks Helped Shape Modern Misinformation
It will never be possible to defeat MAGA followers “logically” with people who believed his parties rhetoric “that 9/11 was an inside job.”

I say… what if those Republican leaders were self reporting?
What if Trump followers have been rallying behind the very man responsible for its orchestration?

The Twin Towers and Larry Silverstein
Architectural Pitfalls of the Twin Towers:
· The Twin Towers had unique architectural flaws due to the excessive heavy load on their exoskeletons to allow for more floor and leasing space, which greatly contributed to their straight collapse after the 9/11 attacks. This was the first and last skyscraper made in this way.
· For anyone who said that “any other building would have fallen sideways,” you were right, though perhaps not entirely how you may have imagined. A "Coke Can" analogy shows how a similar weakened structure can result in a straight fall, contrary to conspiracy theories claiming controlled demolitions. This isn't something I'm asking you to take for granted, or to read from media sources you don’t trust. This is something you can verify on your own, in person, in real time, in reality.
· However Trump, despite being close friends with Silverstein as we’ll cover later, claimed "It wasn’t architectural defects, you know, the World Trade Center was always known as a very, very strong building” per the attached PolitiFact article.
· Supporting Article:
Engineering Experts Explain the Collapse of the Twin Towers
Politifact Donald Trumps 911 Speculation

Larry Silverstein, The Leasor Of The Twin Towers:
· Nearly went bankrupt after losing his main tenant Drexel Burnham in 1980 after he built tower 7 with him in mind.
· I don't know how many of us understand the level of desperation a situation like this can cause in someone and how many potential crimes it can easily push them towards.
· He is known for then saying, “…looking up at the twin towers and thinking, my building is huge, but it is made diminutive by the twin towers. So I said to myself, wouldn't it be incredible someday to own those?" That's not the statement of a sane person who nearly went bankrupt, and if anything, hints towards jealousy.
· He managed to secure Salomon Brothers two years later, which later paid $300 million in securities fraud penalties casting suspicion over the entities who saved Silverstein, in addition to their overall plans for the future.
· How he would become able to outbid everyone else in 2001, for the right to lease the twin towers, would become a mystery we will untangle later.
Further Reading
Manhattan Institute – Silverstein On Ground Zero
Justice Department: Salomon Brothers Securities Fraud

Trump and Real Estate Connections
Historical Context and Redevelopment Plans:
· A redevelopment plan commenced in the 1990s by Gov. Pataki and Mayor Giuliani, spurred a commercial revival in downtown Manhattan, making the World Trade Center prime property. Pataki would go on to criticize trump, while the other would prove to be one of this wildest, if not craziest, supporters to truly fanatical degrees.
Further Reading:
Manhattan Institute: Rebuilding Ground Zero
· Tom Leppert was the CEO of Turner construction which right wing conspiracy theorists claimed helped ensure the towers would fall straight down. He also became part of Trumps transition team. While there’s no evidence of explosives being used, tampering with the exoskeleton and weaking the relatively thin central column ahead of time are theoretically plausible.
Huffpost Donald Trump Transition Team
Wikipedia Tom Leppert

The bidding for the World Trade Center lease involved only a few major real estate firms as allowed by the Port Authority Chairman. Below are the allowed bidders and their estimated worth at the time included:

· Donald J. Trump’s Organization:
o Worth around $1.5 billion in 1996 after multiple bankruptcies. Confirmed only by Forbes magazine in 2005.
· Tishman Speyer:
o Valued at approximately $1.8 billion in 2000, would soon face ‘tenant issues’ with many scrupulous legal claims against them.
· Gale & Wentworth:
o Worth a few million.
· Mortimer Zuckerman’s Boston Properties:
o Mortimer Zuckerman alone was worth around $2 billion.
· The Rouse Company:
o Mainly a shopping mall operator.
· Brookfield Properties:
o A Canadian firm valued at over $20 billion in 2000.
· Vornado Realty Trust:
o Worth an estimated $2-3 billion. Had the highest bid, but was unexpectedly outed by the Port Authority Chairman, paving the way for Silverstein’s win. CEO of Vornado Trust, Steven Roth would later do many deals with Trump in 2005 and beyond.
· Larry Silverstein:
o As mentioned, was nearly bankrupt in the 1980s, and was mysteriously awarded the right to lease the World Trade Center contract at $3.2 billion, twice the original asking price of 1.2 Billion. It would still be owned by the Port authority of NY and NJ, he would just own the rights to lease it.
o Port Authority Chairman, Lewis Eisenberg, made this unexplained decision, who also later became Trumps lead fundraiser in 2015.
o After putting down only $125 million, as per the contract, Silverstein would be getting back $100 million just 6 weeks after his bid and with an uncommon terrorist insurance addition. His exaggerated bid and insurance contract would also greatly inflate the amount of money he could get from an insurance claim. If the winning bid was 1.5 billion, the insurance payout would also have been much less.
o In real estate, its quite rare for a prudent investor to bid twice the asking price, as demonstrated by the other companies that backed out, of which I find no connections to Trump.
o If anyone had known about 9/11 ahead of time, like Trump claims he did, it would become drastically easier to outbid all competitors, knowing that for pennies on the dollar, you would be getting much more back.

Further Reading:
NY Times Article on World Trade Center Deal
Wikipedia on Lewis Eisenberg
Patch On Lew Eisenberg Leading Trump Fundraising
NY Times Article Silverstein Gets Most Of His Money Back

Giuliani’s Gangster Acts
Arguably, if the above points are what they objectively appear to be, that would be a bad thing. You’d think that would be enough. However, Guliani would say “hold my beer’ to those sentiments.

1. Outdated Equipment for First Responders:
· Due to Giuliani’s inadequate leadership, first responders used old equipment that failed to warn them to evacuate the towers. Which contributed to their deaths while they searched for survivors.
NY Times Article: Giuliani’s Preparedness on 9/11
2. Obstructed Recovery Efforts:
· Giuliani delayed proper search and rescue operations for days, possibly costing lives of citizens and first responders who didn’t know they needed to leave.
· 20 Years later he would claim that some of Bidens actions were so reckless that… “It would be as if I got down to ground zero and said take out the firefighters, all you civilians see if you can get yourselves out.” Self report?
NBC News Report: Giuliani’s Role in Recovery
NY1: Giuliani Reflects on 9/11 Anniversary
3. Twin Towers Fund and Privatization:
· Giuliani privatized the Twin Towers relief funds, making them unauditable.
NY Times Article on Privatization
NY Post Article: Giuliani and Twin Towers Fund
4. Survivors Threaten To SUE Guliani For Relief Funds
· Even after privatizing the twin towers fund, Giuliani would make it incredibly difficult for the victims to receive their fair share. Requiring many of them to spend unnecessary money on advisors and consultants.
· Even with their legal pressure, he only agreed to “give the remaining 100 million to victims,” out of 170 million, if he could first put the money into the bank account of a charity in which he controlled.
· From the attached article: “But Harold Schaitberger, president of the International Association of Fire Fighters, said that he remained adamantly opposed to any transfer of funds to Mr. Giuliani's charity.
He also objected to Mr. Giuliani's continued control over even the $15 million in his private charity. Mr. Giuliani, he charged, gives every indication of using the Twin Towers Fund to maintain a staff of loyal supporters and to advance his political aspirations.
'The concern that politics will infiltrate the fund becomes even more apparent when one reviews the list of the mayor's former political appointees who are assuming senior staff positions or serving on the fund's board of directors,'' he wrote in a letter on Monday to Eliot L. Spitzer, the state attorney general.”
NY Times Article On Guliani Pressed To Disperse Twin Tower Funds
· However, there is no evidence of Giuliani making good on this promise.
· There are honestly no words for this. All associates of Guliani should be investigated.
5. Attempted Election Cancellation in 2001:
· Giuliani tried to cancel the 2001 election to stay mayor longer. He even considered removing term limits with Governor Pataki’s support. Similar to how Trump has “joked” about increasing his own term limits.
Business Insider: Giuliani and Pataki’s Attempt to Cancel Elections
Esquire Trump Joke Third Term
6. Motive
· In 2000, Guliani unfortunately got prostate cancer. We have to be willing to ask if this was a motive for his corrupt acts.
SurvivorNet: Giuliani’s Cancer


Silverstein’s Unscrupulous Greed
1. Initial Settlement Demands and Profit Claims:
· Despite only having been out for $25 million, Silverstein initially sought nearly $8 BILLION in insurance settlements and argued for "loss of revenue from those buildings," which is quite an uncompassionate claim considering how many lost their lives. Talk about a prime example of the working and lower classes making sacrifices while rich elites complain they didn’t profit enough from the same tragedy.
2. Rebuilding Contributions and Insurance Payout:
· Despite the fact that he only owned the leasing rights to the twin towers, ‘Silverstein Properties’ received up to $4 billion from insurance payouts, instead of the Port Authority, which would be customary as the owner.
· While it's assumed that most of that money went to rebuilding, this isn't actually known or proven. It would be different if he had a separate insurance policy that was not connected to the rebuilding of the towers, with different monies going to the Port Authority to rebuild. This was not the case.
History.com: Rebuilding of Ground Zero
· He additionally refused to return the rights of Building 1 to the Port Authority until he secured additional funds from an $8 billion state fund. Talk about heartless.
Wikipedia: Larry Silverstein
· Various entities would contribute a total of $20 billion to rebuild all six damaged or destroyed towers, including four towers leased by Silverstein and two others he hadn't. This makes it unlikely that he had to go out of pocket with his 4 Billion.
3. Estimated Net Worth:
· While earlier records of Silverstein's net worth are unavailable, aside from his near bankruptcy in 1980, he is currently estimated to be worth around $1 billion.
Forbes Profile: Larry Silverstein

Silverstein’s Controversial Alignment with Trump
Larry Silverstein's connections and public persona have often been scrutinized. This scrutiny became particularly relevant in 2015 when he publicly displayed his support for Donald Trump:

• Long-standing Relationship: Silverstein revealed a 30-year-long acquaintance with Trump, emphasizing the depth of their connection. This means his relationship started in 1985, roughly two years after gaining a powerful criminal organization as a tenant in his tower 7, that saved him from bankruptcy, and 6 years before Trumps first, of many, bankruptcies. This also means they knew each other before 9/11.
• Supportive Yet Vague: He commended Trump for diligently pursuing what he believed to be right, echoing Trump's own ambiguous rhetoric. When pressed about the righteousness of Trump’s goals, Silverstein ambiguously responded, "well, it’s... you know... we’ll find out." This mirrors Trump’s evasive " Well, we're going to have to see what happens" stance, when questioned about committing to a peaceful transfer of power prior to January 6th—an event that ultimately unfolded with violence and chaos.
• Early Endorsement: By voicing his support when Trump announced his presidential campaign, Silverstein positioned himself as one of the early prominent figures in the MAGA movement.

Watch Silverstein Discuss Trump
CNN Trump On 2020 Election

The Man Who Boasted
When most people witness a tragedy, especially of this size, it takes time for their brains to comprehend what happened, it takes even more time to process it. Thus, anyone who was able to brag about their own assets hours after this tragedy on a radio show, is at least worthy of Investigation, especially if this very event helped reshape a misinformation landscape in which he would thrive as its King.
Politifact – How 911 Attacks Helped Shape Modern Misinformation

· Insensitive Boasts About Building Height:
o Trump also boasted that with the fall of the Twin Towers, his building became the tallest in Manhattan—an inaccurate and insensitive claim given the context.
Independent 9 11 Trump Tallest Building
· Early Claims and Revisions:
o Shortly after 9/11, Donald Trump claimed he saw the second plane hit the towers from his Manhattan apartment. He also made an unfounded claim that he saw thousands of Muslims in New Jersey cheering, a statement that has been widely debunked. Despite varying explanations and suggesting that he saw it on an untraceable video that was “widely covered,” these claims helped fueled significant conspiracy theories. If anything, this was a self-report.
o Snopes: Trump Claims Muslims Cheered
o FactCheck.org: Trump’s Revised 9/11 Claim
· Visit to Ground Zero:
o A week after the attacks, Trump visited Ground Zero and stated that although he was present, he wouldn’t consider himself a first responder. This attempt at humility struck many as morbidly insensitive, considering the true heroism displayed by actual first responders.
ABC News: Trump Shares New Details About Morning of 9/11

Legacy of Suspicion:
These actions paint Trump as one of the more suspicious figures post-9/11, who may have used the tragedy for personal and political gain. His connections with figures like Larry Silverstein and Lewis Eisenberg, the Port Authority chairman, hint at deep financial interests potentially influenced by the 9/11 aftermath. Meanwhile, survivors and first responders faced challenges in securing support, highlighting the disparities between their experiences and the political maneuvers at play. Again morbidly juxtaposing the struggles of the poor and working class versus elite swamp members such as Trump and his ilk.

While being, arguably, one of the more suspicious Americans of potentially “being an insider," Trump would go on to cast doubt everywhere else with his new holier than thou rhetoric and hints and claims that “it was an inside job” for the next 15 years.

What if he was speaking from personal experience.

The Deepfake Dilemma
Now in a world where Trump's followers already discount reality, the emergence of AI-generated deepfakes threatens to further distort the truth. This technology could transform legal standards of evidence, making it easy to dismiss genuine evidence against the right as fabricated, while baseless accusations against the left might be accepted as the long-awaited proof.

The Potential Escalation of MAGA Actions
Given the willingness of MAGA supporters to storm the Capitol on January 6th, bolstered by Trump's incendiary rhetoric, the potential for escalation is alarming. The advent of fabricated images and videos could present unprecedented national security threats.

Trump's Incendiary Rhetoric on January 6th
Trump's speech on January 6th was a clear incitement, as he urged his followers to "fight like hell" to "stop the steal," despite admitting DURING THE SPEECH that there was no evidence of the massive electoral fraud he claimed. As well as his lawyers laughable court “arguments.”
“...while there is no evidence to prove any wrongdoing…”
Npr.Org Read Trumps Jan 6 Speech
LawAndCrime Come On Now

This speech, coupled with his undermining of constitutional processes, underscores the risks and intentional deceit of his rhetoric. Too bad Republicans senators and our Supreme Court have either claimed he was above the law, or continue to postpone his court dates till after elections. A wild position when treason is on the table. Did that dude commit treason that claims he wants to become a dictator? I dunno, lets let him potentially get elected and then find out!

Elon Musk's Political Shift
Elon was once very much a leftist, unfortunately in more and more far left “activists” continue to attack him endlessly for not agreeing with them on their own singular issues and perspectives. To them I say congratulations, you successfully pushed the most powerful man on earth into the far right. Great job. Great job.
Elon Musk's journey from a liberal supporter to a figure embraced by the far right highlights the volatile nature of political affiliations in today's polarized environment. His actions since acquiring Twitter—such as promoting unfounded conspiracy theories and making high-profile firings—suggest a departure from his initial free speech advocacy.
Especially when considering he fired Don Lemon from his platform for an interview he found offensive. Canceling opinions you find offensive isn’t free speech, it’s literally the opposite. I’m sure many people were offended by the examples below. What about them?
Far Right Support Examples: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6

The Need for a Critical Approach
Supporters of Trump should critically evaluate why he did not pardon the January 6th insurrectionists during his term, despite using them as political leverage now. This pattern of using allies until they are no longer useful is evident throughout his political and personal dealings.
What better example could there possibly be as to what trump truly thinks of his supporters, how sacrificial he sees them as part of his endless narratives, then his refusal and failure to pardon January 6th insurrectionists while still in office?
Of course, anyone “just on the grass” or outside the building should only get a day in jail at most, however people that barged inside the capital should naturally get much more.
And while trump refused to pardon those people before, he now calls them “hostages” and is using them as political bait to a truly wild degree. It's very likely he will make good on this promise to further embolden the narrative that “Democrats are trying to take you down and only I can save you.”
His supporters need to seriously ask, “Why didn’t he pardon us before?”
Also, remember when he claimed he would pay legal fees for supporters that were violent at his rallies, but then seemed to falter and change his mind. Much like how Amber Heard donated her money, “by pledging it.”
List of allies he was quick to discard or dump. And let's face it, all of these people have done more for him than the average MAGA supporter. The only person he cares about is himself.
Trump claims that Mike Pence, the man he vetted more than anyone else, “has gone to the dark side.”
Trump seems to have supported the chants to “Hang Mike Pense,” at least in jest? We hope? There are also no links of him condemning them. Yet admittedly this one point doesn’t have hard evidence like a recording or video as far as I know, it certainly fits his brand.
Mike Flynn, a Trump appointee, later testifies against him.
Trump admits Flynn lied on his behalf, accidentally testifying against him, but does pardon him. As long as you’re colluding with Russia you’re ok it seems?

The Future Under Trump's Influence
Trump's rhetoric about overriding constitutional norms to address what he calls "massive fraud" hints at authoritarian aspirations. His praise for dictators and divisive language further aligns with dangerous historical precedents.
Important Articles:
“How a second trump term could end us democracy.” -commondreams
“Ask the expert: What a 2nd Trump term could mean for democracy and advancing policy.” - Msu Today
“Judgement Day” for political opponents.

To predict the future lets base it on known facts:
Apparently, he will help attack our constitution like he may have with the Twin Towers.
“A Massive Fraud of this type and magnitude allows for the termination of all rules, regulations, and articles, even those found in the Constitution.”
Stated he intended to be a Dictator on day one, but then promises it will be just for a day. Is that how that works? Or is it “Once you go Dictator you don’t go back?”
Praising dictators, referring to immigrants as vermin etc, akin to Hitlers rhetoric against “blood mixing.”
More fraudulent use of lawyers and courts that gets everyone else in trouble but him, with them arguing he's above the law. This further shows how much he will consistently use people for his own ends and then dump them when they're no longer of use.
Warning from republicans and notes on ass kissing. As well as being generally unfit for office.
If you want help from Trump you better kiss his ***
Trumps says he kept Omarosa just because she said nice things about him, while defaming her
DeSantis: "You can be the most worthless Republican in America, but if you kiss the ring, he’ll say you’re wonderful."
Thehill Trump Views People Who Kiss His A As Weak.
And if you dare to speak out against trump, you better kiss his ****
Politico Graham Breaks With Trump On Abortion
WashingtonPost Trump Graham Abortion
News Yahoo 30 More Republicans Denounce Donald Trump Unqualified President
Hot take, if he’s elected president America, and the world, is frankly fucked.

Predicting MAGA 2024 And Beyond
Naturally there are endless possibilities of what MAGA and dictators around the world decide to do this year and into the future. I believe that the one thing that insinuates when it's time for their next evil actions is dictated by their standings in the polls or when a fellow dictator needs a little more political pressure from war torn inflated oil prices etc.
Dictators Unite
While writing my thesis, I speculated that dictators globally were uniting, finding mutual benefits in their governance and deceitful tactics. This theory is increasingly recognized as these autocrats appear to be forming a coalition, undermining peaceful unity efforts through conspiracy theories to preserve their power.
Unherd How Autocrats Unite
The True Nature of MAGA
MAGA was never genuinely about speaking truth to power or restoring America's glory. It has been an elaborate scheme funded by immense wealth, perpetuating anti-American sentiments through fabricated grassroots movements by domestic and foreign actors. This movement has primarily enriched a select few power-hungry dictators and may have been responsible for some of our most horrific moments in history in the past and acts yet to come.
Trump and MAGA
While 'MAGA' predates Trump, he conveniently stepped into a role long in the making. Despite occasional deviations from the MAGA ideology, such as promoting vaccines to emphatic boos, Trump has largely embodied its principles. The real architects of MAGA, however, are likely disillusioned with his unpredictable attacks, which contradict their broader agenda of absolute power.
Nbc News Donald Trump Booed
Trump as a Martyr
Regardless of election outcomes, Trump is poised to claim interference. His rhetoric and the devout belief of his followers in his divine anointment could lead to his martyrdom, especially given his age and the vulnerabilities it brings. This martyrdom could solidify his legacy while serving the interests of MAGA strategists who find him increasingly burdensome even if he “wins.”
Factcheck Trumps Bogus Voter Fraud Claims
La Times Trump Democrats Effort Presidential Ballot

u/neodestiny and friends.
Introduction
If you think you know anything about MAGA. Trust me, you know nothing. Not even his most devout followers or haters will have considered the following. And for the sake of our democracy and way of life, I hope people read this.
This work may very well help to shift the narrative on Trump in a meaningful and foundational way, but I don't want this work exacerbate any feelings of ill will to MAGA members, for they have been prey to possibly one of the largest con jobs our world has ever seen, especially without the help of this counternarrative.
Snippet From My Thesis On MAGA
As I work on tidying up the master file with the helpful dms I got, allow me to post just the most contentious part of it below, now that it’s able to stand on its own.
MAGA didn’t begin in 2015. I argue it began in 2001 on 9/11, while also harnessing and funneling decades of anti-government resentment till many Americans would openly call for a “wrecking ball” figure to help “drain the swamp.”
This work may very well help to shift the narrative on Trump in a meaningful and foundational way, but I don't want this work exacerbate any feelings of ill will to MAGA members, for they have been prey to possibly one of the largest con jobs our world has ever seen, especially without the help of this counternarrative.
A Key Fueling Factor To American Outrage- Inflation
Many elements contributed to growing American anger that would later contribute to MAGA, this is a snippet from the larger work.
Rising Cost of Living
o In 1950, the Consumer Price Index (CPI) was 24.1. By 2000, it had risen to 168 (a 597% increase), and by 2023, it had reached 304.7, a 1163% increase from 1950.
o Housing prices saw a drastic rise overtime, with the median home price increasing from $7,354 in 1950 to $388,700 in 2023, a staggering 5185% increase.
o While rising rent costs can contribute to overall inflation and cost of living, even the left has largely failed to address how exponentially increasing real estate prices impact the cost of living. This omission has made many other conspiracy theories seem more plausible in its wake.
o If we don’t find real solutions for real estate that also aren’t extreme, then society will feel more and more pressure to accept “unreasonable solutions” like Trump, even though he’s the last person on earth who could solve it, considering his business acumen and history.
MAGA Dynamics and Blind Devotion
In 2016, it wasn't just the left calling the MAGA movement a cult. Trump famously said, "I could stand in the middle of Fifth Avenue and shoot somebody, and I wouldn't lose any voters." Even the left failed to grasp the gravity of this statement. As someone who nearly died in a deadly cult and based on my research, I don't know of a single cult where the founder could openly commit murder without losing members. Trump didn't just believe he'd created one of the largest cults ever; he believed he'd created the most fanatical. Let's hope his followers prove him wrong by showing a willingness to criticize him, regardless of their vote.

The MAGA Question
Instead of challenging MAGA supporters on fallacious beliefs, ask them this question to see if they’re at least able to see a world where Trump isn’t a biblical King: "If Trump admitted he was behind 9/11 and used resulting insurance money and donations from hostile governments to create false “grass root” campaigns. And did it all in a way to make it seem like others committed his own atrocities. And that he intended to destroy America in every way if he got elected, would you still vote for him?"

Yet even then, getting through to a MAGA supporter inevitably refers to 9/11 “research” out there when they realize individual positions are usually fallacious. This quagmire me decide to investigate this tragedy, to see if there was a more plausible counter theory. Honestly, the more I looked the more surprised I became. Here are my findings that are but a snippet of my full thesis on MAGA.

9/11 Conspiracy Theories and MAGA
Conspiracy Theories and Credibility:
o First off, conspiracy theories should involve some effort to verify narratives, rather than just repeating claims across multiple sources that mistake themselves as evidence; like a bunch of people who repeat “bob farted” across multiple websites may see that as evidence, when in fact, it was Sean. Sorry Sean.

Early Origins of MAGA:
o Although some believe MAGA began in 2015, its roots lie as early as the 1980s with Rush Limbaugh and later became "serious" on 9/11.
o 9/11 conspiracy theories claim controlled demolitions were used, but the lack of any cellphone recordings of explosions weakens this theory.

Suspicious Factors:
o The official narrative involving chaotic jet fuel leading to a straight fall seemed questionable.
o The collapse of a third building (WTC 7), which wasn’t directly hit, fueled suspicions.
o Airline stocks were heavily shorted before the attacks, raising concerns about insider trading. Harvey Pitt, Republican SEC Chairman at the time, investigated this and claimed there was nothing amiss, but was criticized for later crimes and forced to resign.
o It’s also suspicious that in Trumps 2000 book “The America We Deserve” that he stated, “I really am convinced we’re in danger of the sort of terrorist attacks that will make the [1993] bombing of the Trade Center look like kids playing with firecrackers. No sensible analyst rejects this possibility, and plenty of them, like me, are not wondering if but when it will happen*.”*
§ Yet democrats would largely miss this point entirely and obsess over his false claim that he called for Bin Laden to be killed, when he had not. Somehow conspiracy theorists would find this ‘cool’ rather than suspicious.
CNN Fact Check Donald Trump Osama Bin Laden Book Claim

Reports and Simplified Narratives:
o FEMA's 2002 report and NIST's 2005 report provided technical explanations of the tower collapses.
o However, the Port Authority Chairman stuck to the oversimplified narrative that "jet fuel melted steel beams," even though he knew this was a half-truth, as detailed in the next section, fueling anti-government conspiracies. The question is why.

Potential Impact:
o 9/11 conspiracy theories sowed distrust in the government, which may have been one of the attackers' objectives. Anyone that heavily profited from this tragedy, and helped further those objects, should be questioned.
o The ‘Loose Change’ “documentary” pointed out suspicious parts of the story, but failed to give any clear claims as to who was purportedly behind it. It also failed to note the Twin Towers titanic design flaw that could result in a straight fall. Even the 2015 version of this film fails to mention nearly all of the known facts in this report.
o The Director of that film later states:
“I DON’T THINK WE’D HAVE PRESIDENT TRUMP IF IT WEREN’T FOR 9/11”
“9/11 created a culture of fear, of xenophobia, this sense of entitlement and everything we’ve seen. Warrantless wire-tapping, Guantanamo Bay, everything that’s happened led us to this point, we wouldn’t be here without 9/11. They want to kick out all the Mexicans and Muslims because of this culture of fear and bigotry and xenophobia that directly led to the election of fucking Donald Trump. [laughing] That’s our world now! We had Reagan before, and Governor Schwarzenegger. But President Donald Trump? It’s just weird. Everything is just weird.”
Theoutline Reflecting On Loose Change
o While the director was in the right to ask questions, he failed to ask the most obvious ones.
o However, his lead “researcher,” Jason Bermas, would turn out to be a full blown MAGA wingnut.
Patriot Jason Bermas
o Anyone that would benefit politically and financially from 9/11 should be fully investigated.
Further Reading:
Harvey Pitt - Wikipedia
Politifact How 911 Attacks Helped Shape Modern Misinformation
It will never be possible to defeat MAGA followers “logically” with people who believed his parties rhetoric “that 9/11 was an inside job.”

I say… what if those Republican leaders were self reporting?
What if Trump followers have been rallying behind the very man responsible for its orchestration?

The Twin Towers and Larry Silverstein
Architectural Pitfalls of the Twin Towers:
· The Twin Towers had unique architectural flaws due to the excessive heavy load on their exoskeletons to allow for more floor and leasing space, which greatly contributed to their straight collapse after the 9/11 attacks. This was the first and last skyscraper made in this way.
· For anyone who said that “any other building would have fallen sideways,” you were right, though perhaps not entirely how you may have imagined. A "Coke Can" analogy shows how a similar weakened structure can result in a straight fall, contrary to conspiracy theories claiming controlled demolitions. This isn't something I'm asking you to take for granted, or to read from media sources you don’t trust. This is something you can verify on your own, in person, in real time, in reality.
· However Trump, despite being close friends with Silverstein as we’ll cover later, claimed "It wasn’t architectural defects, you know, the World Trade Center was always known as a very, very strong building” per the attached PolitiFact article.
· Supporting Article:
Engineering Experts Explain the Collapse of the Twin Towers
Politifact Donald Trumps 911 Speculation

Larry Silverstein, The Leasor Of The Twin Towers:
· Nearly went bankrupt after losing his main tenant Drexel Burnham in 1980 after he built tower 7 with him in mind.
· I don't know how many of us understand the level of desperation a situation like this can cause in someone and how many potential crimes it can easily push them towards.
· He is known for then saying, “…looking up at the twin towers and thinking, my building is huge, but it is made diminutive by the twin towers. So I said to myself, wouldn't it be incredible someday to own those?" That's not the statement of a sane person who nearly went bankrupt, and if anything, hints towards jealousy.
· He managed to secure Salomon Brothers two years later, which later paid $300 million in securities fraud penalties casting suspicion over the entities who saved Silverstein, in addition to their overall plans for the future.
· How he would become able to outbid everyone else in 2001, for the right to lease the twin towers, would become a mystery we will untangle later.
Further Reading
Manhattan Institute – Silverstein On Ground Zero
Justice Department: Salomon Brothers Securities Fraud

Trump and Real Estate Connections
Historical Context and Redevelopment Plans:
· A redevelopment plan commenced in the 1990s by Gov. Pataki and Mayor Giuliani, spurred a commercial revival in downtown Manhattan, making the World Trade Center prime property. Pataki would go on to criticize trump, while the other would prove to be one of this wildest, if not craziest, supporters to truly fanatical degrees.
Further Reading:
Manhattan Institute: Rebuilding Ground Zero
· Tom Leppert was the CEO of Turner construction which right wing conspiracy theorists claimed helped ensure the towers would fall straight down. He also became part of Trumps transition team. While there’s no evidence of explosives being used, tampering with the exoskeleton and weaking the relatively thin central column ahead of time are theoretically plausible.
Huffpost Donald Trump Transition Team
Wikipedia Tom Leppert

The bidding for the World Trade Center lease involved only a few major real estate firms as allowed by the Port Authority Chairman. Below are the allowed bidders and their estimated worth at the time included:

· Donald J. Trump’s Organization:
o Worth around $1.5 billion in 1996 after multiple bankruptcies. Confirmed only by Forbes magazine in 2005.
· Tishman Speyer:
o Valued at approximately $1.8 billion in 2000, would soon face ‘tenant issues’ with many scrupulous legal claims against them.
· Gale & Wentworth:
o Worth a few million.
· Mortimer Zuckerman’s Boston Properties:
o Mortimer Zuckerman alone was worth around $2 billion.
· The Rouse Company:
o Mainly a shopping mall operator.
· Brookfield Properties:
o A Canadian firm valued at over $20 billion in 2000.
· Vornado Realty Trust:
o Worth an estimated $2-3 billion. Had the highest bid, but was unexpectedly outed by the Port Authority Chairman, paving the way for Silverstein’s win. CEO of Vornado Trust, Steven Roth would later do many deals with Trump in 2005 and beyond.
· Larry Silverstein:
o As mentioned, was nearly bankrupt in the 1980s, and was mysteriously awarded the right to lease the World Trade Center contract at $3.2 billion, twice the original asking price of 1.2 Billion. It would still be owned by the Port authority of NY and NJ, he would just own the rights to lease it.
o Port Authority Chairman, Lewis Eisenberg, made this unexplained decision, who also later became Trumps lead fundraiser in 2015.
o After putting down only $125 million, as per the contract, Silverstein would be getting back $100 million just 6 weeks after his bid and with an uncommon terrorist insurance addition. His exaggerated bid and insurance contract would also greatly inflate the amount of money he could get from an insurance claim. If the winning bid was 1.5 billion, the insurance payout would also have been much less.
o In real estate, its quite rare for a prudent investor to bid twice the asking price, as demonstrated by the other companies that backed out, of which I find no connections to Trump.
o If anyone had known about 9/11 ahead of time, like Trump claims he did, it would become drastically easier to outbid all competitors, knowing that for pennies on the dollar, you would be getting much more back.

Further Reading:
NY Times Article on World Trade Center Deal
Wikipedia on Lewis Eisenberg
Patch On Lew Eisenberg Leading Trump Fundraising
NY Times Article Silverstein Gets Most Of His Money Back

Giuliani’s Gangster Acts
Arguably, if the above points are what they objectively appear to be, that would be a bad thing. You’d think that would be enough. However, Guliani would say “hold my beer’ to those sentiments.

1. Outdated Equipment for First Responders:
· Due to Giuliani’s inadequate leadership, first responders used old equipment that failed to warn them to evacuate the towers. Which contributed to their deaths while they searched for survivors.
NY Times Article: Giuliani’s Preparedness on 9/11
2. Obstructed Recovery Efforts:
· Giuliani delayed proper search and rescue operations for days, possibly costing lives of citizens and first responders who didn’t know they needed to leave.
· 20 Years later he would claim that some of Bidens actions were so reckless that… “It would be as if I got down to ground zero and said take out the firefighters, all you civilians see if you can get yourselves out.” Self report?
NBC News Report: Giuliani’s Role in Recovery
NY1: Giuliani Reflects on 9/11 Anniversary
3. Twin Towers Fund and Privatization:
· Giuliani privatized the Twin Towers relief funds, making them unauditable.
NY Times Article on Privatization
NY Post Article: Giuliani and Twin Towers Fund
4. Survivors Threaten To SUE Guliani For Relief Funds
· Even after privatizing the twin towers fund, Giuliani would make it incredibly difficult for the victims to receive their fair share. Requiring many of them to spend unnecessary money on advisors and consultants.
· Even with their legal pressure, he only agreed to “give the remaining 100 million to victims,” out of 170 million, if he could first put the money into the bank account of a charity in which he controlled.
· From the attached article: “But Harold Schaitberger, president of the International Association of Fire Fighters, said that he remained adamantly opposed to any transfer of funds to Mr. Giuliani's charity.
He also objected to Mr. Giuliani's continued control over even the $15 million in his private charity. Mr. Giuliani, he charged, gives every indication of using the Twin Towers Fund to maintain a staff of loyal supporters and to advance his political aspirations.
'The concern that politics will infiltrate the fund becomes even more apparent when one reviews the list of the mayor's former political appointees who are assuming senior staff positions or serving on the fund's board of directors,'' he wrote in a letter on Monday to Eliot L. Spitzer, the state attorney general.”
NY Times Article On Guliani Pressed To Disperse Twin Tower Funds
· However, there is no evidence of Giuliani making good on this promise.
· There are honestly no words for this. All associates of Guliani should be investigated.
5. Attempted Election Cancellation in 2001:
· Giuliani tried to cancel the 2001 election to stay mayor longer. He even considered removing term limits with Governor Pataki’s support. Similar to how Trump has “joked” about increasing his own term limits.
Business Insider: Giuliani and Pataki’s Attempt to Cancel Elections
Esquire Trump Joke Third Term
6. Motive
· In 2000, Guliani unfortunately got prostate cancer. We have to be willing to ask if this was a motive for his corrupt acts.
SurvivorNet: Giuliani’s Cancer


Silverstein’s Unscrupulous Greed
1. Initial Settlement Demands and Profit Claims:
· Despite only having been out for $25 million, Silverstein initially sought nearly $8 BILLION in insurance settlements and argued for "loss of revenue from those buildings," which is quite an uncompassionate claim considering how many lost their lives. Talk about a prime example of the working and lower classes making sacrifices while rich elites complain they didn’t profit enough from the same tragedy.
2. Rebuilding Contributions and Insurance Payout:
· Despite the fact that he only owned the leasing rights to the twin towers, ‘Silverstein Properties’ received up to $4 billion from insurance payouts, instead of the Port Authority, which would be customary as the owner.
· While it's assumed that most of that money went to rebuilding, this isn't actually known or proven. It would be different if he had a separate insurance policy that was not connected to the rebuilding of the towers, with different monies going to the Port Authority to rebuild. This was not the case.
History.com: Rebuilding of Ground Zero
· He additionally refused to return the rights of Building 1 to the Port Authority until he secured additional funds from an $8 billion state fund. Talk about heartless.
Wikipedia: Larry Silverstein
· Various entities would contribute a total of $20 billion to rebuild all six damaged or destroyed towers, including four towers leased by Silverstein and two others he hadn't. This makes it unlikely that he had to go out of pocket with his 4 Billion.
3. Estimated Net Worth:
· While earlier records of Silverstein's net worth are unavailable, aside from his near bankruptcy in 1980, he is currently estimated to be worth around $1 billion.
Forbes Profile: Larry Silverstein

Silverstein’s Controversial Alignment with Trump
Larry Silverstein's connections and public persona have often been scrutinized. This scrutiny became particularly relevant in 2015 when he publicly displayed his support for Donald Trump:

• Long-standing Relationship: Silverstein revealed a 30-year-long acquaintance with Trump, emphasizing the depth of their connection. This means his relationship started in 1985, roughly two years after gaining a powerful criminal organization as a tenant in his tower 7, that saved him from bankruptcy, and 6 years before Trumps first, of many, bankruptcies. This also means they knew each other before 9/11.
• Supportive Yet Vague: He commended Trump for diligently pursuing what he believed to be right, echoing Trump's own ambiguous rhetoric. When pressed about the righteousness of Trump’s goals, Silverstein ambiguously responded, "well, it’s... you know... we’ll find out." This mirrors Trump’s evasive " Well, we're going to have to see what happens" stance, when questioned about committing to a peaceful transfer of power prior to January 6th—an event that ultimately unfolded with violence and chaos.
• Early Endorsement: By voicing his support when Trump announced his presidential campaign, Silverstein positioned himself as one of the early prominent figures in the MAGA movement.

Watch Silverstein Discuss Trump
CNN Trump On 2020 Election

The Man Who Boasted
When most people witness a tragedy, especially of this size, it takes time for their brains to comprehend what happened, it takes even more time to process it. Thus, anyone who was able to brag about their own assets hours after this tragedy on a radio show, is at least worthy of Investigation, especially if this very event helped reshape a misinformation landscape in which he would thrive as its King.
Politifact – How 911 Attacks Helped Shape Modern Misinformation

· Insensitive Boasts About Building Height:
o Trump also boasted that with the fall of the Twin Towers, his building became the tallest in Manhattan—an inaccurate and insensitive claim given the context.
Independent 9 11 Trump Tallest Building
· Early Claims and Revisions:
o Shortly after 9/11, Donald Trump claimed he saw the second plane hit the towers from his Manhattan apartment. He also made an unfounded claim that he saw thousands of Muslims in New Jersey cheering, a statement that has been widely debunked. Despite varying explanations and suggesting that he saw it on an untraceable video that was “widely covered,” these claims helped fueled significant conspiracy theories. If anything, this was a self-report.
o Snopes: Trump Claims Muslims Cheered
o FactCheck.org: Trump’s Revised 9/11 Claim
· Visit to Ground Zero:
o A week after the attacks, Trump visited Ground Zero and stated that although he was present, he wouldn’t consider himself a first responder. This attempt at humility struck many as morbidly insensitive, considering the true heroism displayed by actual first responders.
ABC News: Trump Shares New Details About Morning of 9/11

Legacy of Suspicion:
These actions paint Trump as one of the more suspicious figures post-9/11, who may have used the tragedy for personal and political gain. His connections with figures like Larry Silverstein and Lewis Eisenberg, the Port Authority chairman, hint at deep financial interests potentially influenced by the 9/11 aftermath. Meanwhile, survivors and first responders faced challenges in securing support, highlighting the disparities between their experiences and the political maneuvers at play. Again morbidly juxtaposing the struggles of the poor and working class versus elite swamp members such as Trump and his ilk.

While being, arguably, one of the more suspicious Americans of potentially “being an insider," Trump would go on to cast doubt everywhere else with his new holier than thou rhetoric and hints and claims that “it was an inside job” for the next 15 years.

What if he was speaking from personal experience.

The Deepfake Dilemma
Now in a world where Trump's followers already discount reality, the emergence of AI-generated deepfakes threatens to further distort the truth. This technology could transform legal standards of evidence, making it easy to dismiss genuine evidence against the right as fabricated, while baseless accusations against the left might be accepted as the long-awaited proof.

The Potential Escalation of MAGA Actions
Given the willingness of MAGA supporters to storm the Capitol on January 6th, bolstered by Trump's incendiary rhetoric, the potential for escalation is alarming. The advent of fabricated images and videos could present unprecedented national security threats.

Trump's Incendiary Rhetoric on January 6th
Trump's speech on January 6th was a clear incitement, as he urged his followers to "fight like hell" to "stop the steal," despite admitting DURING THE SPEECH that there was no evidence of the massive electoral fraud he claimed. As well as his lawyers laughable court “arguments.”
“...while there is no evidence to prove any wrongdoing…”
Npr.Org Read Trumps Jan 6 Speech
LawAndCrime Come On Now

This speech, coupled with his undermining of constitutional processes, underscores the risks and intentional deceit of his rhetoric. Too bad Republicans senators and our Supreme Court have either claimed he was above the law, or continue to postpone his court dates till after elections. A wild position when treason is on the table. Did that dude commit treason that claims he wants to become a dictator? I dunno, lets let him potentially get elected and then find out!

Elon Musk's Political Shift
Elon was once very much a leftist, unfortunately in more and more far left “activists” continue to attack him endlessly for not agreeing with them on their own singular issues and perspectives. To them I say congratulations, you successfully pushed the most powerful man on earth into the far right. Great job. Great job.
Elon Musk's journey from a liberal supporter to a figure embraced by the far right highlights the volatile nature of political affiliations in today's polarized environment. His actions since acquiring Twitter—such as promoting unfounded conspiracy theories and making high-profile firings—suggest a departure from his initial free speech advocacy.
Especially when considering he fired Don Lemon from his platform for an interview he found offensive. Canceling opinions you find offensive isn’t free speech, it’s literally the opposite. I’m sure many people were offended by the examples below. What about them?
Far Right Support Examples: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6

The Need for a Critical Approach
Supporters of Trump should critically evaluate why he did not pardon the January 6th insurrectionists during his term, despite using them as political leverage now. This pattern of using allies until they are no longer useful is evident throughout his political and personal dealings.
What better example could there possibly be as to what trump truly thinks of his supporters, how sacrificial he sees them as part of his endless narratives, then his refusal and failure to pardon January 6th insurrectionists while still in office?
Of course, anyone “just on the grass” or outside the building should only get a day in jail at most, however people that barged inside the capital should naturally get much more.
And while trump refused to pardon those people before, he now calls them “hostages” and is using them as political bait to a truly wild degree. It's very likely he will make good on this promise to further embolden the narrative that “Democrats are trying to take you down and only I can save you.”
His supporters need to seriously ask, “Why didn’t he pardon us before?”
Also, remember when he claimed he would pay legal fees for supporters that were violent at his rallies, but then seemed to falter and change his mind. Much like how Amber Heard donated her money, “by pledging it.”
List of allies he was quick to discard or dump. And let's face it, all of these people have done more for him than the average MAGA supporter. The only person he cares about is himself.
Trump claims that Mike Pence, the man he vetted more than anyone else, “has gone to the dark side.”
Trump seems to have supported the chants to “Hang Mike Pense,” at least in jest? We hope? There are also no links of him condemning them. Yet admittedly this one point doesn’t have hard evidence like a recording or video as far as I know, it certainly fits his brand.
Mike Flynn, a Trump appointee, later testifies against him.
Trump admits Flynn lied on his behalf, accidentally testifying against him, but does pardon him. As long as you’re colluding with Russia you’re ok it seems?

The Future Under Trump's Influence
Trump's rhetoric about overriding constitutional norms to address what he calls "massive fraud" hints at authoritarian aspirations. His praise for dictators and divisive language further aligns with dangerous historical precedents.
Important Articles:
“How a second trump term could end us democracy.” -commondreams
“Ask the expert: What a 2nd Trump term could mean for democracy and advancing policy.” - Msu Today
“Judgement Day” for political opponents.

To predict the future lets base it on known facts:
Apparently, he will help attack our constitution like he may have with the Twin Towers.
“A Massive Fraud of this type and magnitude allows for the termination of all rules, regulations, and articles, even those found in the Constitution.”
Stated he intended to be a Dictator on day one, but then promises it will be just for a day. Is that how that works? Or is it “Once you go Dictator you don’t go back?”
Praising dictators, referring to immigrants as vermin etc, akin to Hitlers rhetoric against “blood mixing.”
More fraudulent use of lawyers and courts that gets everyone else in trouble but him, with them arguing he's above the law. This further shows how much he will consistently use people for his own ends and then dump them when they're no longer of use.
Warning from republicans and notes on ass kissing. As well as being generally unfit for office.
If you want help from Trump you better kiss his ***
Trumps says he kept Omarosa just because she said nice things about him, while defaming her
DeSantis: "You can be the most worthless Republican in America, but if you kiss the ring, he’ll say you’re wonderful."
Thehill Trump Views People Who Kiss His A As Weak.
And if you dare to speak out against trump, you better kiss his ****
Politico Graham Breaks With Trump On Abortion
WashingtonPost Trump Graham Abortion
News Yahoo 30 More Republicans Denounce Donald Trump Unqualified President
Hot take, if he’s elected president America, and the world, is frankly fucked.

Predicting MAGA 2024 And Beyond
Naturally there are endless possibilities of what MAGA and dictators around the world decide to do this year and into the future. I believe that the one thing that insinuates when it's time for their next evil actions is dictated by their standings in the polls or when a fellow dictator needs a little more political pressure from war torn inflated oil prices etc.
Dictators Unite
While writing my thesis, I speculated that dictators globally were uniting, finding mutual benefits in their governance and deceitful tactics. This theory is increasingly recognized as these autocrats appear to be forming a coalition, undermining peaceful unity efforts through conspiracy theories to preserve their power.
Unherd How Autocrats Unite
The True Nature of MAGA
MAGA was never genuinely about speaking truth to power or restoring America's glory. It has been an elaborate scheme funded by immense wealth, perpetuating anti-American sentiments through fabricated grassroots movements by domestic and foreign actors. This movement has primarily enriched a select few power-hungry dictators and may have been responsible for some of our most horrific moments in history in the past and acts yet to come.
Trump and MAGA
While 'MAGA' predates Trump, he conveniently stepped into a role long in the making. Despite occasional deviations from the MAGA ideology, such as promoting vaccines to emphatic boos, Trump has largely embodied its principles. The real architects of MAGA, however, are likely disillusioned with his unpredictable attacks, which contradict their broader agenda of absolute power.
Nbc News Donald Trump Booed
Trump as a Martyr
Regardless of election outcomes, Trump is poised to claim interference. His rhetoric and the devout belief of his followers in his divine anointment could lead to his martyrdom, especially given his age and the vulnerabilities it brings. This martyrdom could solidify his legacy while serving the interests of MAGA strategists who find him increasingly burdensome even if he “wins.”
Factcheck Trumps Bogus Voter Fraud Claims
La Times Trump Democrats Effort Presidential Ballot

u/neodestiny and friends.
For the sake of transparency, I am not the architect of the following discoveries, and am just helping to forward their message and clean it up. Copywrite of the following work belongs to no one and everyone is not only welcome to share these findings as if they were their own, but openly encouraged to do so.
Introduction
If you think you know anything about MAGA. Trust me, you know nothing. Not even his most devout followers or haters will have considered the following. And for the sake of our democracy and way of life, I hope people read this.
This work may very well help to shift the narrative on Trump in a meaningful and foundational way, but I don't want this work exacerbate any feelings of ill will to MAGA members, for they have been prey to possibly one of the largest con jobs our world has ever seen, especially without the help of this counternarrative.
Snippet From My Thesis On MAGA
As I work on tidying up the master file with the helpful dms I got, allow me to post just the most contentious part of it below, now that it’s able to stand on its own.
MAGA didn’t begin in 2015. I argue it began in 2001 on 9/11, while also harnessing and funneling decades of anti-government resentment till many Americans would openly call for a “wrecking ball” figure to help “drain the swamp.”

A Key Fueling Factor To American Outrage- Inflation
Many elements contributed to growing American anger that would later contribute to MAGA, this is a snippet from the larger work.
Rising Cost of Living
o In 1950, the Consumer Price Index (CPI) was 24.1. By 2000, it had risen to 168 (a 597% increase), and by 2023, it had reached 304.7, a 1163% increase from 1950.
o Housing prices saw a drastic rise overtime, with the median home price increasing from $7,354 in 1950 to $388,700 in 2023, a staggering 5185% increase.
o While rising rent costs can contribute to overall inflation and cost of living, even the left has largely failed to address how exponentially increasing real estate prices impact the cost of living. This omission has made many other conspiracy theories seem more plausible in its wake.
o If we don’t find real solutions for real estate that also aren’t extreme, then society will feel more and more pressure to accept “unreasonable solutions” like Trump, even though he’s the last person on earth who could solve it, considering his business acumen and history.
MAGA Dynamics and Blind Devotion
In 2016, it wasn't just the left calling the MAGA movement a cult. Trump famously said, "I could stand in the middle of Fifth Avenue and shoot somebody, and I wouldn't lose any voters." Even the left failed to grasp the gravity of this statement. As someone who nearly died in a deadly cult and based on my research, I don't know of a single cult where the founder could openly commit murder without losing members. Trump didn't just believe he'd created one of the largest cults ever; he believed he'd created the most fanatical. Let's hope his followers prove him wrong by showing a willingness to criticize him, regardless of their vote.

The MAGA Question
Instead of challenging MAGA supporters on fallacious beliefs, ask them this question to see if they’re at least able to see a world where Trump isn’t a biblical King: "If Trump admitted he was behind 9/11 and used resulting insurance money and donations from hostile governments to create false “grass root” campaigns. And did it all in a way to make it seem like others committed his own atrocities. And that he intended to destroy America in every way if he got elected, would you still vote for him?"

Yet even then, getting through to a MAGA supporter inevitably refers to 9/11 “research” out there when they realize individual positions are usually fallacious. This quagmire me decide to investigate this tragedy, to see if there was a more plausible counter theory. Honestly, the more I looked the more surprised I became. Here are my findings that are but a snippet of my full thesis on MAGA.

9/11 Conspiracy Theories and MAGA
Conspiracy Theories and Credibility:
o First off, conspiracy theories should involve some effort to verify narratives, rather than just repeating claims across multiple sources that mistake themselves as evidence; like a bunch of people who repeat “bob farted” across multiple websites may see that as evidence, when in fact, it was Sean. Sorry Sean.

Early Origins of MAGA:
o Although some believe MAGA began in 2015, its roots lie as early as the 1980s with Rush Limbaugh and later became "serious" on 9/11.
o 9/11 conspiracy theories claim controlled demolitions were used, but the lack of any cellphone recordings of explosions weakens this theory.

Suspicious Factors:
o The official narrative involving chaotic jet fuel leading to a straight fall seemed questionable.
o The collapse of a third building (WTC 7), which wasn’t directly hit, fueled suspicions.
o Airline stocks were heavily shorted before the attacks, raising concerns about insider trading. Harvey Pitt, Republican SEC Chairman at the time, investigated this and claimed there was nothing amiss, but was criticized for later crimes and forced to resign.
o It’s also suspicious that in Trumps 2000 book “The America We Deserve” that he stated, “I really am convinced we’re in danger of the sort of terrorist attacks that will make the [1993] bombing of the Trade Center look like kids playing with firecrackers. No sensible analyst rejects this possibility, and plenty of them, like me, are not wondering if but when it will happen*.”*
§ Yet democrats would largely miss this point entirely and obsess over his false claim that he called for Bin Laden to be killed, when he had not. Somehow conspiracy theorists would find this ‘cool’ rather than suspicious.
CNN Fact Check Donald Trump Osama Bin Laden Book Claim

Reports and Simplified Narratives:
o FEMA's 2002 report and NIST's 2005 report provided technical explanations of the tower collapses.
o However, the Port Authority Chairman stuck to the oversimplified narrative that "jet fuel melted steel beams," even though he knew this was a half-truth, as detailed in the next section, fueling anti-government conspiracies. The question is why.

Potential Impact:
o 9/11 conspiracy theories sowed distrust in the government, which may have been one of the attackers' objectives. Anyone that heavily profited from this tragedy, and helped further those objects, should be questioned.
o The ‘Loose Change’ “documentary” pointed out suspicious parts of the story, but failed to give any clear claims as to who was purportedly behind it. It also failed to note the Twin Towers titanic design flaw that could result in a straight fall. Even the 2015 version of this film fails to mention nearly all of the known facts in this report.
o The Director of that film later states:
“I DON’T THINK WE’D HAVE PRESIDENT TRUMP IF IT WEREN’T FOR 9/11”
“9/11 created a culture of fear, of xenophobia, this sense of entitlement and everything we’ve seen. Warrantless wire-tapping, Guantanamo Bay, everything that’s happened led us to this point, we wouldn’t be here without 9/11. They want to kick out all the Mexicans and Muslims because of this culture of fear and bigotry and xenophobia that directly led to the election of fucking Donald Trump. [laughing] That’s our world now! We had Reagan before, and Governor Schwarzenegger. But President Donald Trump? It’s just weird. Everything is just weird.”
Theoutline Reflecting On Loose Change
o While the director was in the right to ask questions, he failed to ask the most obvious ones.
o However, his lead “researcher,” Jason Bermas, would turn out to be a full blown MAGA wingnut.
Patriot Jason Bermas
o Anyone that would benefit politically and financially from 9/11 should be fully investigated.
Further Reading:
Harvey Pitt - Wikipedia
Politifact How 911 Attacks Helped Shape Modern Misinformation
It will never be possible to defeat MAGA followers “logically” with people who believed his parties rhetoric “that 9/11 was an inside job.”

I say… what if those Republican leaders were self reporting?
What if Trump followers have been rallying behind the very man responsible for its orchestration?

The Twin Towers and Larry Silverstein
Architectural Pitfalls of the Twin Towers:
· The Twin Towers had unique architectural flaws due to the excessive heavy load on their exoskeletons to allow for more floor and leasing space, which greatly contributed to their straight collapse after the 9/11 attacks. This was the first and last skyscraper made in this way.
· For anyone who said that “any other building would have fallen sideways,” you were right, though perhaps not entirely how you may have imagined. A "Coke Can" analogy shows how a similar weakened structure can result in a straight fall, contrary to conspiracy theories claiming controlled demolitions. This isn't something I'm asking you to take for granted, or to read from media sources you don’t trust. This is something you can verify on your own, in person, in real time, in reality.
· However Trump, despite being close friends with Silverstein as we’ll cover later, claimed "It wasn’t architectural defects, you know, the World Trade Center was always known as a very, very strong building” per the attached PolitiFact article.
· Supporting Article:
Engineering Experts Explain the Collapse of the Twin Towers
Politifact Donald Trumps 911 Speculation

Larry Silverstein, The Leasor Of The Twin Towers:
· Nearly went bankrupt after losing his main tenant Drexel Burnham in 1980 after he built tower 7 with him in mind.
· I don't know how many of us understand the level of desperation a situation like this can cause in someone and how many potential crimes it can easily push them towards.
· He is known for then saying, “…looking up at the twin towers and thinking, my building is huge, but it is made diminutive by the twin towers. So I said to myself, wouldn't it be incredible someday to own those?" That's not the statement of a sane person who nearly went bankrupt, and if anything, hints towards jealousy.
· He managed to secure Salomon Brothers two years later, which later paid $300 million in securities fraud penalties casting suspicion over the entities who saved Silverstein, in addition to their overall plans for the future.
· How he would become able to outbid everyone else in 2001, for the right to lease the twin towers, would become a mystery we will untangle later.
Further Reading
Manhattan Institute – Silverstein On Ground Zero
Justice Department: Salomon Brothers Securities Fraud

Trump and Real Estate Connections
Historical Context and Redevelopment Plans:
· A redevelopment plan commenced in the 1990s by Gov. Pataki and Mayor Giuliani, spurred a commercial revival in downtown Manhattan, making the World Trade Center prime property. Pataki would go on to criticize trump, while the other would prove to be one of this wildest, if not craziest, supporters to truly fanatical degrees.
Further Reading:
Manhattan Institute: Rebuilding Ground Zero
· Tom Leppert was the CEO of Turner construction which right wing conspiracy theorists claimed helped ensure the towers would fall straight down. He also became part of Trumps transition team. While there’s no evidence of explosives being used, tampering with the exoskeleton and weaking the relatively thin central column ahead of time are theoretically plausible.
Huffpost Donald Trump Transition Team
Wikipedia Tom Leppert

The bidding for the World Trade Center lease involved only a few major real estate firms as allowed by the Port Authority Chairman. Below are the allowed bidders and their estimated worth at the time included:

· Donald J. Trump’s Organization:
o Worth around $1.5 billion in 1996 after multiple bankruptcies. Confirmed only by Forbes magazine in 2005.
· Tishman Speyer:
o Valued at approximately $1.8 billion in 2000, would soon face ‘tenant issues’ with many scrupulous legal claims against them.
· Gale & Wentworth:
o Worth a few million.
· Mortimer Zuckerman’s Boston Properties:
o Mortimer Zuckerman alone was worth around $2 billion.
· The Rouse Company:
o Mainly a shopping mall operator.
· Brookfield Properties:
o A Canadian firm valued at over $20 billion in 2000.
· Vornado Realty Trust:
o Worth an estimated $2-3 billion. Had the highest bid, but was unexpectedly outed by the Port Authority Chairman, paving the way for Silverstein’s win. CEO of Vornado Trust, Steven Roth would later do many deals with Trump in 2005 and beyond.
· Larry Silverstein:
o As mentioned, was nearly bankrupt in the 1980s, and was mysteriously awarded the right to lease the World Trade Center contract at $3.2 billion, twice the original asking price of 1.2 Billion. It would still be owned by the Port authority of NY and NJ, he would just own the rights to lease it.
o Port Authority Chairman, Lewis Eisenberg, made this unexplained decision, who also later became Trumps lead fundraiser in 2015.
o After putting down only $125 million, as per the contract, Silverstein would be getting back $100 million just 6 weeks after his bid and with an uncommon terrorist insurance addition. His exaggerated bid and insurance contract would also greatly inflate the amount of money he could get from an insurance claim. If the winning bid was 1.5 billion, the insurance payout would also have been much less.
o In real estate, its quite rare for a prudent investor to bid twice the asking price, as demonstrated by the other companies that backed out, of which I find no connections to Trump.
o If anyone had known about 9/11 ahead of time, like Trump claims he did, it would become drastically easier to outbid all competitors, knowing that for pennies on the dollar, you would be getting much more back.

Further Reading:
NY Times Article on World Trade Center Deal
Wikipedia on Lewis Eisenberg
Patch On Lew Eisenberg Leading Trump Fundraising
NY Times Article Silverstein Gets Most Of His Money Back

Giuliani’s Gangster Acts
Arguably, if the above points are what they objectively appear to be, that would be a bad thing. You’d think that would be enough. However, Guliani would say “hold my beer’ to those sentiments.

1. Outdated Equipment for First Responders:
· Due to Giuliani’s inadequate leadership, first responders used old equipment that failed to warn them to evacuate the towers. Which contributed to their deaths while they searched for survivors.
NY Times Article: Giuliani’s Preparedness on 9/11
2. Obstructed Recovery Efforts:
· Giuliani delayed proper search and rescue operations for days, possibly costing lives of citizens and first responders who didn’t know they needed to leave.
· 20 Years later he would claim that some of Bidens actions were so reckless that… “It would be as if I got down to ground zero and said take out the firefighters, all you civilians see if you can get yourselves out.” Self report?
NBC News Report: Giuliani’s Role in Recovery
NY1: Giuliani Reflects on 9/11 Anniversary
3. Twin Towers Fund and Privatization:
· Giuliani privatized the Twin Towers relief funds, making them unauditable.
NY Times Article on Privatization
NY Post Article: Giuliani and Twin Towers Fund
4. Survivors Threaten To SUE Guliani For Relief Funds
· Even after privatizing the twin towers fund, Giuliani would make it incredibly difficult for the victims to receive their fair share. Requiring many of them to spend unnecessary money on advisors and consultants.
· Even with their legal pressure, he only agreed to “give the remaining 100 million to victims,” out of 170 million, if he could first put the money into the bank account of a charity in which he controlled.
· From the attached article: “But Harold Schaitberger, president of the International Association of Fire Fighters, said that he remained adamantly opposed to any transfer of funds to Mr. Giuliani's charity.
He also objected to Mr. Giuliani's continued control over even the $15 million in his private charity. Mr. Giuliani, he charged, gives every indication of using the Twin Towers Fund to maintain a staff of loyal supporters and to advance his political aspirations.
'The concern that politics will infiltrate the fund becomes even more apparent when one reviews the list of the mayor's former political appointees who are assuming senior staff positions or serving on the fund's board of directors,'' he wrote in a letter on Monday to Eliot L. Spitzer, the state attorney general.”
NY Times Article On Guliani Pressed To Disperse Twin Tower Funds
· However, there is no evidence of Giuliani making good on this promise.
· There are honestly no words for this. All associates of Guliani should be investigated.
5. Attempted Election Cancellation in 2001:
· Giuliani tried to cancel the 2001 election to stay mayor longer. He even considered removing term limits with Governor Pataki’s support. Similar to how Trump has “joked” about increasing his own term limits.
Business Insider: Giuliani and Pataki’s Attempt to Cancel Elections
Esquire Trump Joke Third Term
6. Motive
· In 2000, Guliani unfortunately got prostate cancer. We have to be willing to ask if this was a motive for his corrupt acts.
SurvivorNet: Giuliani’s Cancer


Silverstein’s Unscrupulous Greed
1. Initial Settlement Demands and Profit Claims:
· Despite only having been out for $25 million, Silverstein initially sought nearly $8 BILLION in insurance settlements and argued for "loss of revenue from those buildings," which is quite an uncompassionate claim considering how many lost their lives. Talk about a prime example of the working and lower classes making sacrifices while rich elites complain they didn’t profit enough from the same tragedy.
2. Rebuilding Contributions and Insurance Payout:
· Despite the fact that he only owned the leasing rights to the twin towers, ‘Silverstein Properties’ received up to $4 billion from insurance payouts, instead of the Port Authority, which would be customary as the owner.
· While it's assumed that most of that money went to rebuilding, this isn't actually known or proven. It would be different if he had a separate insurance policy that was not connected to the rebuilding of the towers, with different monies going to the Port Authority to rebuild. This was not the case.
History.com: Rebuilding of Ground Zero
· He additionally refused to return the rights of Building 1 to the Port Authority until he secured additional funds from an $8 billion state fund. Talk about heartless.
Wikipedia: Larry Silverstein
· Various entities would contribute a total of $20 billion to rebuild all six damaged or destroyed towers, including four towers leased by Silverstein and two others he hadn't. This makes it unlikely that he had to go out of pocket with his 4 Billion.
3. Estimated Net Worth:
· While earlier records of Silverstein's net worth are unavailable, aside from his near bankruptcy in 1980, he is currently estimated to be worth around $1 billion.
Forbes Profile: Larry Silverstein

Silverstein’s Controversial Alignment with Trump
Larry Silverstein's connections and public persona have often been scrutinized. This scrutiny became particularly relevant in 2015 when he publicly displayed his support for Donald Trump:

• Long-standing Relationship: Silverstein revealed a 30-year-long acquaintance with Trump, emphasizing the depth of their connection. This means his relationship started in 1985, roughly two years after gaining a powerful criminal organization as a tenant in his tower 7, that saved him from bankruptcy, and 6 years before Trumps first, of many, bankruptcies. This also means they knew each other before 9/11.
• Supportive Yet Vague: He commended Trump for diligently pursuing what he believed to be right, echoing Trump's own ambiguous rhetoric. When pressed about the righteousness of Trump’s goals, Silverstein ambiguously responded, "well, it’s... you know... we’ll find out." This mirrors Trump’s evasive " Well, we're going to have to see what happens" stance, when questioned about committing to a peaceful transfer of power prior to January 6th—an event that ultimately unfolded with violence and chaos.
• Early Endorsement: By voicing his support when Trump announced his presidential campaign, Silverstein positioned himself as one of the early prominent figures in the MAGA movement.

Watch Silverstein Discuss Trump
CNN Trump On 2020 Election

The Man Who Boasted
When most people witness a tragedy, especially of this size, it takes time for their brains to comprehend what happened, it takes even more time to process it. Thus, anyone who was able to brag about their own assets hours after this tragedy on a radio show, is at least worthy of Investigation, especially if this very event helped reshape a misinformation landscape in which he would thrive as its King.
Politifact – How 911 Attacks Helped Shape Modern Misinformation

· Insensitive Boasts About Building Height:
o Trump also boasted that with the fall of the Twin Towers, his building became the tallest in Manhattan—an inaccurate and insensitive claim given the context.
Independent 9 11 Trump Tallest Building
· Early Claims and Revisions:
o Shortly after 9/11, Donald Trump claimed he saw the second plane hit the towers from his Manhattan apartment. He also made an unfounded claim that he saw thousands of Muslims in New Jersey cheering, a statement that has been widely debunked. Despite varying explanations and suggesting that he saw it on an untraceable video that was “widely covered,” these claims helped fueled significant conspiracy theories. If anything, this was a self-report.
o Snopes: Trump Claims Muslims Cheered
o FactCheck.org: Trump’s Revised 9/11 Claim
· Visit to Ground Zero:
o A week after the attacks, Trump visited Ground Zero and stated that although he was present, he wouldn’t consider himself a first responder. This attempt at humility struck many as morbidly insensitive, considering the true heroism displayed by actual first responders.
ABC News: Trump Shares New Details About Morning of 9/11

Legacy of Suspicion:
These actions paint Trump as one of the more suspicious figures post-9/11, who may have used the tragedy for personal and political gain. His connections with figures like Larry Silverstein and Lewis Eisenberg, the Port Authority chairman, hint at deep financial interests potentially influenced by the 9/11 aftermath. Meanwhile, survivors and first responders faced challenges in securing support, highlighting the disparities between their experiences and the political maneuvers at play. Again morbidly juxtaposing the struggles of the poor and working class versus elite swamp members such as Trump and his ilk.

While being, arguably, one of the more suspicious Americans of potentially “being an insider," Trump would go on to cast doubt everywhere else with his new holier than thou rhetoric and hints and claims that “it was an inside job” for the next 15 years.

What if he was speaking from personal experience.

The Deepfake Dilemma
Now in a world where Trump's followers already discount reality, the emergence of AI-generated deepfakes threatens to further distort the truth. This technology could transform legal standards of evidence, making it easy to dismiss genuine evidence against the right as fabricated, while baseless accusations against the left might be accepted as the long-awaited proof.

The Potential Escalation of MAGA Actions
Given the willingness of MAGA supporters to storm the Capitol on January 6th, bolstered by Trump's incendiary rhetoric, the potential for escalation is alarming. The advent of fabricated images and videos could present unprecedented national security threats.

Trump's Incendiary Rhetoric on January 6th
Trump's speech on January 6th was a clear incitement, as he urged his followers to "fight like hell" to "stop the steal," despite admitting DURING THE SPEECH that there was no evidence of the massive electoral fraud he claimed. As well as his lawyers laughable court “arguments.”
“...while there is no evidence to prove any wrongdoing…”
Npr.Org Read Trumps Jan 6 Speech
LawAndCrime Come On Now

This speech, coupled with his undermining of constitutional processes, underscores the risks and intentional deceit of his rhetoric. Too bad Republicans senators and our Supreme Court have either claimed he was above the law, or continue to postpone his court dates till after elections. A wild position when treason is on the table. Did that dude commit treason that claims he wants to become a dictator? I dunno, lets let him potentially get elected and then find out!

Elon Musk's Political Shift
Elon was once very much a leftist, unfortunately in more and more far left “activists” continue to attack him endlessly for not agreeing with them on their own singular issues and perspectives. To them I say congratulations, you successfully pushed the most powerful man on earth into the far right. Great job. Great job.
Elon Musk's journey from a liberal supporter to a figure embraced by the far right highlights the volatile nature of political affiliations in today's polarized environment. His actions since acquiring Twitter—such as promoting unfounded conspiracy theories and making high-profile firings—suggest a departure from his initial free speech advocacy.
Especially when considering he fired Don Lemon from his platform for an interview he found offensive. Canceling opinions you find offensive isn’t free speech, it’s literally the opposite. I’m sure many people were offended by the examples below. What about them?
Far Right Support Examples: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6

The Need for a Critical Approach
Supporters of Trump should critically evaluate why he did not pardon the January 6th insurrectionists during his term, despite using them as political leverage now. This pattern of using allies until they are no longer useful is evident throughout his political and personal dealings.
What better example could there possibly be as to what trump truly thinks of his supporters, how sacrificial he sees them as part of his endless narratives, then his refusal and failure to pardon January 6th insurrectionists while still in office?
Of course, anyone “just on the grass” or outside the building should only get a day in jail at most, however people that barged inside the capital should naturally get much more.
And while trump refused to pardon those people before, he now calls them “hostages” and is using them as political bait to a truly wild degree. It's very likely he will make good on this promise to further embolden the narrative that “Democrats are trying to take you down and only I can save you.”
His supporters need to seriously ask, “Why didn’t he pardon us before?”
Also, remember when he claimed he would pay legal fees for supporters that were violent at his rallies, but then seemed to falter and change his mind. Much like how Amber Heard donated her money, “by pledging it.”
List of allies he was quick to discard or dump. And let's face it, all of these people have done more for him than the average MAGA supporter. The only person he cares about is himself.
Trump claims that Mike Pence, the man he vetted more than anyone else, “has gone to the dark side.”
Trump seems to have supported the chants to “Hang Mike Pense,” at least in jest? We hope? There are also no links of him condemning them. Yet admittedly this one point doesn’t have hard evidence like a recording or video as far as I know, it certainly fits his brand.
Mike Flynn, a Trump appointee, later testifies against him.
Trump admits Flynn lied on his behalf, accidentally testifying against him, but does pardon him. As long as you’re colluding with Russia you’re ok it seems?

The Future Under Trump's Influence
Trump's rhetoric about overriding constitutional norms to address what he calls "massive fraud" hints at authoritarian aspirations. His praise for dictators and divisive language further aligns with dangerous historical precedents.
Important Articles:
“How a second trump term could end us democracy.” -commondreams
“Ask the expert: What a 2nd Trump term could mean for democracy and advancing policy.” - Msu Today
“Judgement Day” for political opponents.

To predict the future lets base it on known facts:
Apparently, he will help attack our constitution like he may have with the Twin Towers.
“A Massive Fraud of this type and magnitude allows for the termination of all rules, regulations, and articles, even those found in the Constitution.”
Stated he intended to be a Dictator on day one, but then promises it will be just for a day. Is that how that works? Or is it “Once you go Dictator you don’t go back?”
Praising dictators, referring to immigrants as vermin etc, akin to Hitlers rhetoric against “blood mixing.”
More fraudulent use of lawyers and courts that gets everyone else in trouble but him, with them arguing he's above the law. This further shows how much he will consistently use people for his own ends and then dump them when they're no longer of use.
Warning from republicans and notes on ass kissing. As well as being generally unfit for office.
If you want help from Trump you better kiss his ***
Trumps says he kept Omarosa just because she said nice things about him, while defaming her
DeSantis: "You can be the most worthless Republican in America, but if you kiss the ring, he’ll say you’re wonderful."
Thehill Trump Views People Who Kiss His A As Weak.
And if you dare to speak out against trump, you better kiss his ****
Politico Graham Breaks With Trump On Abortion
WashingtonPost Trump Graham Abortion
News Yahoo 30 More Republicans Denounce Donald Trump Unqualified President
Hot take, if he’s elected president America, and the world, is frankly fucked.

Predicting MAGA 2024 And Beyond
Naturally there are endless possibilities of what MAGA and dictators around the world decide to do this year and into the future. I believe that the one thing that insinuates when it's time for their next evil actions is dictated by their standings in the polls or when a fellow dictator needs a little more political pressure from war torn inflated oil prices etc.
Dictators Unite
While writing my thesis, I speculated that dictators globally were uniting, finding mutual benefits in their governance and deceitful tactics. This theory is increasingly recognized as these autocrats appear to be forming a coalition, undermining peaceful unity efforts through conspiracy theories to preserve their power.
Unherd How Autocrats Unite
The True Nature of MAGA
MAGA was never genuinely about speaking truth to power or restoring America's glory. It has been an elaborate scheme funded by immense wealth, perpetuating anti-American sentiments through fabricated grassroots movements by domestic and foreign actors. This movement has primarily enriched a select few power-hungry dictators and may have been responsible for some of our most horrific moments in history in the past and acts yet to come.
Trump and MAGA
While 'MAGA' predates Trump, he conveniently stepped into a role long in the making. Despite occasional deviations from the MAGA ideology, such as promoting vaccines to emphatic boos, Trump has largely embodied its principles. The real architects of MAGA, however, are likely disillusioned with his unpredictable attacks, which contradict their broader agenda of absolute power.
Nbc News Donald Trump Booed
Trump as a Martyr
Regardless of election outcomes, Trump is poised to claim interference. His rhetoric and the devout belief of his followers in his divine anointment could lead to his martyrdom, especially given his age and the vulnerabilities it brings. This martyrdom could solidify his legacy while serving the interests of MAGA strategists who find him increasingly burdensome even if he “wins.”
Factcheck Trumps Bogus Voter Fraud Claims
La Times Trump Democrats Effort Presidential Ballot

Where’s the YouTube video that’s was promised for Friday??? This is all going past the ridiculous stage, there YouTube videos are always recycled footage that we’ve all seen before from tik tok or ig stories it’s nothing new and exciting, there life consists of getting nails done, opening PR, talking about moving, Renee’s bf, paid brand trips (that they complain about travelling too), there next uk travels and how they excited to make content when they couldn’t even do it the first time. They are 25 year old girls, look at other influencers at 25 or even younger, who have there shit together, regularly posting and making content, whilst running a business even. These girls say they have an editor so why is it so damn hard to sit down or go out in the city you live in because there’s actually so much to do, I have lived on Sunshine Coast my wholes life and have been to the city and outer suburbs hundreds of times and still find new things to do, so why do they struggle so much. They stay up late and sleep in, then say that need to change their habits, yet don’t. The girls are constantly gaslighting and deluding eachother into thinking what they are doing is completely fine and whoever “hates/ criticises them” are just haters and they are horrible people. They always say fucking quotes in there videos or post it to ig stories, what’s the point when you aren’t even going to go by it. They don’t deserve a platform nor all this free PR they get. They think by post every couple of days it’s okay and then following it up with “we are so grateful for this opportunity to do this as job”🤣🤣🤣 no you girls are lazy!!!

According to RowdyCMoore in this video, Mike Lazzo uttered the one quote in 2004 during the CN City rebrand about how shows for adults don’t need good animation (or any at all), while kids shows only needed to be bright, colorful, and loud.
Oh, I can imagine people creating “#BringBackJohnnyTest” hate to stand up to those who defend the show, and realizing the haters were right.

🪞 “It's much easier to get in that it is to get out,” Emilie Autumn used to say. Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4.1 - Part 4.2
She was not wrong. Welcome back to the Asylum write-up!
In this installment, we're finally getting down to the nitty-gritty of the enmity between EA and her fans.
It's time for war. It's time for blood. It's time... for tea. 🎵

THE PRESENT DAY: “ASK ME ANYTHING (WELL, NOT QUITE)”

​

"Ask me anything" titles are catchy, and that’s why I’m using one. But, obviously, don’t ask me anything, by which I mean that, if you think I wouldn’t answer it, you’re probably right. Ask me something really good. I’d love to answer you. I’d love to have comments on these posts, in fact, so that I could answer questions there regularly and ask you things as well, but insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results, or so Einstein is supposed to have said, and attempting to create yet another interactive online venue after every previous attempt has ended in heartbreak—forums, facebook groups, social media accounts—it would indeed be insanity to think that this time would be any different. So there are no comments. This too is heartbreaking in the sense that, and you may not realize this, but I desperately want to connect more completely with you—to be able to intelligently converse and share and exchange. We can do that in person, of course, because the wrong people never show up in person. Isn’t that funny… So, perhaps we’ll have to arrange that;). I’ll start you off with an example question I’d want to know if I were you (I can almost guarantee that you do not want to know this). Q. Hey EA, how do you keep your wireless bodypack transmitter secure when you are leaping about in skimpy costumes and doing frequent costume changes? Also, dye your roots. A. Fantastic question, EA, and I just dyed my roots thank you very much. ... (Deleted blog post followed by a year of radio silence, 2022 📝)

Sooo. For the past five-ish years, the vibe in the Asylum has been that of a protracted Christmas dinner where everyone is tensely moving their food around in their plate, bracing themselves for whatever will trigger the screaming match. Wondering what it's going to be this time. Weary old-timers make small talk about the food because no other topic feels safe. Every glance, every forced smile, is fraught with eons-old grudges and unspoken regrets; every nervous pleasantry sounds like a thinly-veiled accusation. Aunt Emilie always insists on hosting, but not-so-secretly hates having people over. Sooner or later, she finds a way to get all of these assholes out of her house. Most of the adult children are daydreaming about going no-contact.
Everyone ready for some dysfunctional family history?
CW for discussion of bullying, online harassment, mental illness stigma.

YE OLDEN DAYS: CUCKOOS OF A FEATHER NEST TOGETHER

In the beginning, it was beautiful.
EA had the excellent instinct to start banking on her online presence📝 long before MySpace was even a thing. She had a website, several online stores, an active LiveJournal and a ProBoards forum right from the turn of the millennium.
In 2004, she attached an official forum to her website; the earliest archive shows 74 registered users. By the time Opheliac came out in 2006, that number had grown tenfold. And it was, by most accounts, a pretty dope place to be! (I should specify that this write-up focuses on the anglophone side of the fandom: there were also thriving fan-run communities in at least German, French, and Spanish. Because EA doesn't speak any of those languages, the lucky bastards were mostly left alone.)
Forum users enjoyed interacting with some of EA's closest IRL friends and associates – and with the mistress of the house herself (user flair: PsychoFiddler), when she occasionally responded to comments under her own posts. But that wasn't even the main appeal for many. For a long time, on top of all EA-related topics, the official forum had very active “Off-Topic” subforums, with lively and friendly conversation on a variety of subjects. (There was even a “Filthy Libertines (18+)” sub for a while, which was closed due to preemptive concerns about minors.) Swear words (not slurs) were allowed and encouraged, and moderation was overall pretty loose beyond basic enforcement of civility. There was a lot of mutual support, creativity, and solid banter going around.

It wasn't just about Emilie on the forums. People could chat about almost anything with near free reign, making connections and lifelong friends. ... This community mattered SO MUCH to people. They felt included, accepted, and understood within the walls of the Asylum. People invested their time and creative energy into keeping the forums a vibrant, active community, and made sure that carried over into the real world. ... I've never seen anything like it in a fan space. I doubt I ever will again. (@Asylum_Oracle - “Fandom History” Instagram highlight 🔍📝, which contains most of the sources for this segment.)

And it did, indeed, carry over into the real world. There were numerous meet-ups – a few organized by EA, many more spontaneous. People who didn't know any other EA fans in real life, or were just excited to add new Plague Rats to their friend group, would regularly connect with other forum users from their area to meet up and hang out before EA shows. “Who else is dressing up??”
In 2008, for instance, EA held an afternoon meet-up at Lincoln Park in Chicago. 📺 The event was free to attend; it featured live acoustic music and a reading from EA's upcoming book, the intriguingly-titled Asylum for Wayward Victorian Girls.
On the appointed day, EA rolled up in a fabulously tousled red wig, bedazzled white corset and steampunk-altered wedding dress. She had brought friends alongs. Sporting blue hair and a pink bustle and corset was her Chicago bestie, the main forum admin. Rocking a guitar and a top hat was EA's sound engineer, the soft-spoken wizard behind the Victoriandustrial sound, who was also a forum mod. The photographer from the original Opheliac cover art was there as well; he was formally introduced by EA and got his own round of applause.

People who would never normally be involved in an artist's fanbase were in EA's world. And not only were they known – they were respected and incredibly active with the fanbase. These people who managed an online message board were willing to engage in real-world meet-ups (with no security??) because of how tight-knit the community they had built was. People turned out to this event. People traveled to go to this event. It was a short reading of a book that hadn't been released yet, and wouldn't be for some time. Why? Because not only was it a chance to meet Emilie and listen to parts of the new book, but it was also a chance to hang out with their friends from the Asylum. ... The fandom really was a family for a lot of people. (@Asylum_Oracle)

“SERIOUSLY, GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE.”

It all started with The End.
The End Records, that is! Quick refresher: in 2009, after three years or so with Trisol, EA split from the label over allegations that the owner was embezzling money from ticket sales. A few months later, she signed with The End Records. Understandably, EA still wanted to sell the album that had made her famous, and to which she had smartly retained the rights – which meant a brand new, “Deluxe” release of Opheliac. (Remember, from part 3? The one you could pre-order as a bundle with the book? Some projects are just cursed, I guess.)
At that point, Opheliac had been released three times already, as recently as the year before, with only slight variations in format and tracklist. (Yes, that is a theme in this story.) The End Records version would feature new cover art and a handful of new tracks, but overall, it was... you know... the same album.
(The following paragraphs are largely sourced from this excellent recap 🔍📝, which also provides potato screenshots for all quotes.)
One fateful day of August 2009, a user started a thread entitled “Opheliac US edition deluxe re-release??” in the “EA News” subforum. In the thread, some people were kind of balking at the re-do, pondering whether to buy the “new” Opheliac or sit this one out. Some expressed that after three years, they were jonesing for a new album. Others shared what B-sides or dream covers they would have liked to see included on the bonus disc. Just... fans being fans, in a fan discussion space.
And then EA jumped out from behind the curtains.

Fan: Okay. Before I start, I just want you to know that I think it's very good that EA is getting more popularity, and that she can release lots of albums, but - are 5 editions of the same album really needed? You may say now “ah, it's not the same, it has 2 bonus tracks” or whatever, but I mean: it's not new material. Now don't get me wrong. I'm happy for it, maybe I'll even buy it, but I'm just wondering if she shouldn't keep herself busy with other (maybe more important) stuff? * hides * EA: Nobody's forcing you to buy it. Thanks.

Record scratch.

Fan 1: is this Opheliac release version number 4? lol If she's recording NEW tracks, then surely they deserve to be sold by themselves, otherwise people are going to have to buy an album that they may have already bought twice (like me!). But... alas, I am a fool and adore everything this woman does... im buying it lol Fan 2: exactly – if it was just reissuing the last version of Opheliac to tap into new markets that would be fine (...) but if they start adding extra bits of material to albums people already have then the true muffins are going to feel obliged to buy new copies (...) EA: How exactly are you obliged to buy anything? Nobody is forcing you to spend a fucking penny, my dears. I suppose it would make more sense to you to simply not have my records available any more as the old label I just escaped from will no longer be distributing them? Forgive me for adding extra tracks. No obligation necessary.

...Okay, so I'm pretty sure that we can see both sides of the argument here. Fans are annoyed at the idea of spending money on barely-anything-new, because they love EA and buy every single CD she releases. EA is exasperated by fans acting like she's twisting their arm and somehow resenting the inclusion of new material, when she was just ensuring that her album would remain available for purchase and trying to keep things interesting.
But maybe we can also agree that those replies should have been screamed into a pillow rather than typed out on a keyboard.
EA was getting increasingly (and, I'll just say it: disproportionately) sarcastic and defensive in her replies. Enter poor FantineDormouse.
FantineDormouse meant well, I think. Maybe she thought, she's spiraling. Maybe she thought, friends don't let friends go down that road. Granted, FantineDormouse probably should have known better than to phrase it the way she did. Or to assume that EA perceived her as a friend.
Either way, at some point, FantineDormouse jumped in and posted the comment that finally made EA lose it. THE comment which, overnight, ended the honeymoon period of the Asylum, triggering a doomsday domino effect from which the fandom would never truly recover. Are you comfortably seated?

FantineDormouse: Uhm, Emilie, love, I don't mean to sound rude or anything... but maybe you should have a cup of tea and relax a little.

...
* sound of archduke getting shot *

EA: Excuse me? You can throw this onslaught of absolute cruel bullshit at me and those I work with in my own space that I own, and I can't say anything back? How fucking patronizing. Relax? Are you fucking kidding me? Who the fuck do you think you're talking to? FD: I'm not trying to piss you off even more, Emilie. And trust me, I have to deal with it myself, and as much as I would really love to punch the cunts I have to deal with in the face, I don't. You're pissed off, I get it. You're bipolar, which makes it 10x worse, I get that. I'm just not the person to stand around and do nothing when a fight where I'm pretty sure there will be a lot of regret is going on.

Famous last words. Literally! Immediately after EA delivered her irate closing statement – which includes one of my all-time favorite EA zingers, bolded...

EA: I cannot believe this... You just don't stop, do you? So just because I've shared the personal information with you all that I happen to be bipolar, I can't get pissed off at all of you being perfectly awful in the very space that I pay fuckloads a month to have up (has it ever occurred to you all that I pay dearly for this space you play around in?) Why not just tell me that I must be upset because it's my time of the month? Seriously, get the fuck out of my house. You are unbelievable, and your level of patronization is almost criminal. Don't make me write another book. With muffins like you, who needs enemies? Nothing I say or feel is legitimate, not ever ever ever because I'm bipolar... discredited before I begin... unbelievable...

...FantineDormouse got permabanned.
Jaws dropped. After days of infighting between white knights, detractors, and crossfire negotiators, several mod resignations, and general mayhem surrounding the ban, EA made a post entitled “In Which: I Invite You to Make a Fucking Choice.” 📝 For brevity's sake (cue laugh track), I can't reproduce it in all of its righteous splendor, but it's quite a read. It runs the gamut from fair and articulate points about how mental illness shouldn't be used to discredit someone's legitimate anger... to histrionic commands that “deserters to the cause” should “turn in their weapons” if they can't handle her way of doing things.

To those of you who appear not to understand why said posts, most especially those of the banned party, were offensive to me, I give you the option to either educate yourselves on your own time and in your own space (because please never forget that this is my space that I share with all of you at my own expense, and in which I generally give you all the freedom I would wish for myself), or to resign your posts in the Asylum Army – this is not the place for you, and I humbly suggest that you turn your attention and support towards other artists of a more placid, non-controversial, and less opinionated nature; there are more than enough of them out there, and I’m sure they all have forums of their own.

Some fans did leave. Most stuck around, whiplashed. Soon, the storm quieted down, and business as usual resumed on the forum. But something had been damaged beyond repair. The FantineDormouse fiasco had erected walls and drawn lines in the sand, both around EA and among her fans; its sad specter would haunt every Asylum crisis that spiked up forever after. “Fucking Patronizing Fucking” or “FPF” 🔍 became memetic shorthand in the fandom for overreaction and self-righteousness. 🐀
...And now you understand why, in the following years, some fans were so delicate and diplomatic in voicing their very legitimate complaints about messed-up orders, unsigned books, and puzzling lies... while unofficial platforms like Tumblr flourished with pent-up resentment and snark. 🦠

A NOTE ON HARASSMENT: “MAD GIRL, CAN YOU BELIEVE WHAT THEY'VE DONE TO YOU?”

Wouldn't they stop When you asked them to leave you alone? (“Mad Girl”, 2008 🎵)

Now, let's be clear, because it should not be minimized: EA has also been the target of genuine online harassment. Based on the simple fact that she is a woman with a public presence on the internet, I have zero doubt that EA has received (and perhaps continues to receive) more than her share of truly vile, bigoted, creepy and threatening messages – and, knowing what I know about the darker recesses of the Asylum, a terrifying amount of emotional blackmail and obsessive projection from people who hold her to punitively high standards. I'm also inclined to believe that it started way before she ever did anything that warranted any backlash. And that fucking sucks. It's repulsive and inexcusable, and the people who harass her should crawl into a hole and live among the worms.
Notwithstanding. In my decade-plus of following EA drama, the public comments on EA's own platforms (where people knew she was likely to be reading) have been, for the most part... civil and nuanced, and relatively mindful of the human? Even very confrontational comments (some clearly written from a place of anger and desire to shame) rarely resorted to outright name-calling or cruelty. When abusive or bigoted language did crop up, it was often promptly shut down by other fans as gross and uncalled for. In short: I have, with mine own two eyes, in real time, read some of the comment sections that EA described as cesspools of blind rage and odious attacks, and... I just couldn't see it.
If anything, for a long time, a lot of the angry comments directed at EA during any given controversy read more like break-up letters to an ex-best friend: harsh, curt and targeted in a way that cuts deep.... but also kind of screams how much love you still have for this person, against your better judgement.
Not that it wouldn't mess a person up to get hundred of those in a matter of hours, even if they don't individually qualify as “abusive”.
It's worth noting that prior to becoming semi-famous and regretting it, EA was also (by her own account and among other forms of abuse) a victim of intense childhood bullying. It feels like the two situations are closely connected in her mind when her focus seamlessly transitions from one to the other. 📺 I don't think that tremor in her voice is put on.
Based on her writings, I get the feeling that over the years, EA has developed a very black-and-white view of two monolithic groups of people. There's (an idealized vision of) her “real audience”, well-dressed, well-read, kind-hearted, and Asylum-savvy, who she fully trusts to “get it” – and buy it, and love it, unquestioningly, whatever “it” may be at any given time – because that is the true measure of love and loyalty. These are the people she makes art and merch for, the people she writes heart-emoji-filled newsletters to, and desperately longs to see in person again.
And then there's the lynch mob, those who really don't “get it”: the trolls, the faceless creeps, the basement-dwelling mouthbreathers, the ones who stalk her every move obsessively, waiting for any chance to spam her with vicious abuse and slander and obscenities. The latter only exist online (they are manifested into arbitrary existence by the internet itself, not by anything EA said or did), and there is zero overlap between the two sets of people. That seems to be the official narrative.

The "public eye" isn't an [enviable] place to be, and the closer I've come to it, the more horrified I've been. Because, for starters, who is "the public?" Is "the public" my audience? Hell no. My audience is special. They are not the general public. If they were the general public I would be a lot wealthier. The "public eye" means getting stalked, harassed, viscously judged, and put in danger. If I do things in the future that gain notoriety, I will do them in spite of fame, not because of it. I am out for world domination, but not fame. (Interview for The Moaning Times, 2014 📝)

In real life (well, mostly online, but I mean: on this shared plane of existence), things play out slightly differently. The Venn diagram of “true blue fans” and “people who criticize EA" and "people who know way too much about EA” is a circle. The call is 100% coming from inside the Asylum, and I think EA rationally knows that. But here's the thing: no matter how many shows and meet-and-greets you've dressed up for, how many loving and supportive comments you've left, or how many family heirlooms you once pawned to purchase a copy of the not-for-sale 2003 DJ pressing of Enchant... the instant EA feels attacked, everyone is a saboteur and a bully until proven otherwise, and suspected treason is dealt with on the spot. One strike, you're out. Unfortunately for everyone involved, her threshold for bullying seems to be “any remotely thoughtless opinion from any stranger on the internet”.
It makes for outstanding human-interest entertainment... but it also sounds an awful lot like the unhealthy patterns of a person suffering from all sorts of PTSD. 🔍 So, please bear that in mind as you read through this write-up. It's easy to make EA out to be the sole villain, a paranoid and delusional drama queen, based on her extreme reactions to things that often “weren't that bad”. Anything can, in fact, be “that bad” when you're thrown back into the very worst moments of your existence every time your brain decides that the situation is even remotely similar.
PTSD takes over your rational mind and actively distorts your perception of reality. That can be how a person ends up impulse-reacting to “a few people expressing an unfavorable opinion” as if the entire internet had just ganged up on them with knives. Which makes their audience feel unjustly accused, which makes them hostile, which gives the person actual good reason to feel attacked... and so the cycle of hurt continues.

You know the games I play And the words I say When I want my own way You know the lies I tell When you've gone through hell And I say I can't stay You know how hard it can be To keep believing in me When everything and everyone Becomes my enemy, and when There's nothing more you can do I'm gonna blame it on you – It's not the way I wanna be I only hope that in the end You will see: It's the Opheliac in me... (“Opheliac”, 2006 🎵)

And YES, it is extremely regrettable to have this as a trigger, when you're a public figure and you're bound to receive more negative feedback than the average citizen. “It's what she signed up for”, “it comes with the territory” and all that jazz. I really don't think EA was unaware of that fact when she decided to become a musician, share her personal life, and form an intense parasocial bond with her audience. But maybe she underestimated how hard it would be to process and recover from.
Just because you expect something unpleasant to happen, doesn't mean your psyche will be ready to handle it when it does – or that you'll pick the best and most effective strategy to deal with it.

A MADHOUSE UNDER MARTIAL LAW: MARCHING INTO THE FORUM WARS

There are two sides to every story... except for this one! (“If I Burn”, 2012 🎵)

You may have noted the military imagery in EA's “Make a Fucking Choice” response post – “resign your post in the Asylum Army”! What do psychiatry and the military have in common? They're both institutions of top-down social control. 🔍 EA's mixed metaphor may be a bit clunky, but it did foreshadow the evolution of the Asylum – in terms of aesthetics and power dynamics – in the years that followed the FantineDormouse incident and the release of The Book.
EA's next big release after the Asylum book came in 2012. It was a new album, an outline of the soon-to-be Asylum musical, called Fight Like a Girl (FLAG for short). As the name suggests, the main mood was bellicose. Incidentally, in the interim years, EA's communication style generally became noticeably more combative, incendiary, and (within her own spaces) controlling.📝 You remember those quirky word filters on the forum, that would change “fan” to “muffin” and “bra” to “teacup holder”? They kind of took on a Nineteen-Eighty-Four-burlesque flavor when you realized that one filter automatically changed “Fischkopf” to “Liddell” - and that circumventing the rule to address her totally real last name would get you banned, as would any discussion of her family. (“Wikipedia, random internet sites and heresay are not credible sources.” - Mod reminder of forum rules, 2010.)
Also, you try sustaining a serious, grown-up conversation among concerned fans about how Emilie Autumn should “take ratsponsibility for her mistakes out of ratspect for her muffins”. Thus, the official Asylum forum kept a tight grip on overt criticism of EA's claims and actions.

The Emilie Autumn forum is a dystopian hell. Truth be told, when I decided to leave you could not do anything but gush about Emilie. Otherwise all of her extremist arse kissing fans will be down your throat, ripping you apart in seconds, if you so much as questioned her behaviour. So much for freedom of opinion, let alone the idea of creating a harmonious community for ‘outcasts’. Hahaha. (2014 🐀)

The word filter thing really wasn't a big deal – I'm just pointing it out as one goofy expression of EA's need to control the narrative and rhetoric, which became especially noticeable in those post-book, pre-FLAG years. By that point, EA's fuse had been shortened by near on half a decade of non-stop touring / recording / writing / promoting / adjusting to the pressure and demands of an ever-growing fanbase, while also dealing with a horrorshow of personal turmoil and health issues behind the scenes. In other words: she was done taking any shit, in any form, or humoring anyone's ridiculous feedback regarding anything.
To be fair, it was never her forte to begin with. Will it come as a shock if I tell you that EA doesn't have the greatest track record for successful collaborative work? Let's do a quick-cut montage!
EA's very first corporate sponsor was her mother's “Enchant Clothing & Costume” online store 🔍; she went on to claim that her mother was dead. She sessioned for Billy Corgan, that went super well. 🎵 She liked Courtney Love for a minute, but that didn't work out because she felt that Courtney only valued her for her pee. 📝 (It probably didn't help that in early 2006, while EA was recording her post-break-up-tell-all album about Corgan, C-Love was recording her post-rehab-redemption album with Corgan. 🔍 Either way, EA didn't seem to like Courtney anymore after that. Courtney likes her, though! 📝) The one artist EA has ever approached for a duet (and by approached, I mean she recorded a demo and threw the CD on stage when he played Chicago in 2004) was, of all people, Morrissey. That never came to pass, thank mercy 🔍 – this fandom has suffered enough. In 2005, EA recorded some haunting vocals and violins for a potential collab with the frontman of Attrition. When, three years later, they were used on one track 🎵 of Attrition's All Mine Enemies Whisper, she alleged 📝 that the recordings had been obtained from her under the false pretense of a different project, then hideously altered to sound “out of tune”, and used without her permission. She enlisted her fans to boycott the album and the band, and threatened legal action. Meanwhile, on LiveJournal and Attrition's message boards, band associates were appalled: according to them, EA had been aware of the project's nature from the start... and had been completely unreachable, even through her label, during the months of its development. (Besides, Attrition is a semi-obscure English darkwave band from the 80s, whose micro-distributed albums don't even have their own Wikipedia pages... so I wonder what EA was hoping to get out of that theoretical lawsuit. These people own nothing but vintage gain pedals!) The song “Cold Hard Cash” 🎤 by Angelspit (who contributed a remix to one of her EPs in 2008) may or may not be an EA diss track. 🐀 Back when indie jewelry brand RockLove (which now has licensing deals with Disney, Marvel, and DC) was still someone's bedroom project, their first drop was an EA-inspired collection 🔍, which appears in many early Opheliac photoshoots. The partnership was terminated on bad terms, for unclear reasons; the RockLove owner shared in a statement that EA had “drunk the cool-aid” of Trisol Guy's shady business practices, and that the two of them had been spamming her with “crazed angry message[s]” for days.
Why am I talking about this? Because it was precisely one such ill-fated business partnership that triggered the Great Asylum Secession.
One fine day of spring 2010, the owner of vegan make-up brand Aromaleigh popped onto the Asylum forum to announce that they were cutting ties with EA, with damning receipts of copy-pasted emails (lost to time). Basically, the brand had been sponsoring her for half a decade, and while Aromaleigh had been actively promoting her music and tours, EA hadn't exactly been returning the favor. (Indeed, the extent of EA's sponcon seemed to have been a banner link to their website on her front page, and a single “random drunken endorsement” LiveJournal post that kind of reads like satire📝, from 2005.)
EA responded by banning the owner's account, deleting the thread, and posting this flippant statement a few days later:

Dearest Plague Rats, To be honest, I have no idea of what the hell happened with Aromaleigh, and I don't care to find out – the whole drama is a complete mystery to me, as I've been away for months touring and have not been in contact with anyone. All I know is that I've been promoting the company for ages and have not asked them for anything in years. (...) Please focus on more interesting things. I am. (“Save the Drama...” forum post, March 2010)

Posts questioning her good faith in the conflict were deleted from the forum. Shortly thereafter, citing how prolific and labor-intensive the Asylum forum had grown, EA shut down all non-EA related subforums – which, among many other topics, included a pretty active thread about Aromaleigh products.
So one Plague Rat decided to create a separate, members-only forum 📝, where users could recreate some of the now-defunct off-topic threads... and also freely voice their critical opinions of EA's behavior without fear of backlash from mods or rabid stans. Thus, “The Reform” was born. (Reform [n]: amendment of what is defective, vicious, corrupt, or depraved.)
For a few weeks, the two-state solution seemed to work fine. And then word spread among forum mods and other diehard fans that there was this horrid other forum, where obsessive haters gathered to spew disgusting lies and vitriol about EA... and soon enough, it was bedlam in the Asylum.
Any explicit mention of the Reform was forbidden on the Asylum forum. Suspicion of participation in the Reform would get you banned. The party line was that The Reform was the enemy 🐀 – even though a number of people were active on both forums, because they liked freedom of expression almost as much as they liked EA. Double agents would lurk on the forum and report back with snark material; sycophants would infiltrate the Reform to identify traitors – much to the amusement of the “haters”, who mocked them and their ilk for “licking EA's pink sparkly boots”. There was no containing the seething, or the sass, among Asylum ranks.
Pretty soon, the insubordination spread to Tumblr. There was the “Ask the Reform” Q&A blog, where questioning fans could interact with “Rebel Rats”, get more details on past drama, and make up their own minds about the people EA called bullies.
And then, there were the “confession blogs”, which published anonymous submissions about EA, positive, negative or neutral, with little censorship. Finally, you didn't even have to pick a throw-away username on a private forum to voice your hottest / strangest / most controversial EA takes. Fans could vent, rant, lament, wonder, shitpost to their heart's content, anonymously. Obviously, given the context of frustration and censorship in the fandom, a lot of the first waves of confessions were EXTREMELY negative.
EA's acolyte Veronica managed to get the first one shut down. If memory serves, she misunderstood the confession blog format, and may have believed that all the posts on “Emilie Autumn Confessions” came from one or a small group of individuals. She was genuinely devastated, and wrote the blog admin to let them know that they were a terrible person who said terrible things. The admin was mortified, apologized profusely and deleted the blog of their own initiative. (Which goes to show that the concept did not come from cruel and malicious anti-fans, as detractors often claimed.)
But a new blog sprung up almost immediately, with a different mod team, and did not surrender. And much like in EA's own book, once the Plague Rats found out that they possessed the gift of speech... well, they really took to it.
Established in 2011 and passed on through generation after generation of mod teams to the present day, Wayward Victorian Confessions would turn out to be the longest-lived institution in the EA fandom. For over a decade now, through all the bleakest nights and dankest debacles of the Asylum, and despite its initial reputation as a troll den, WVC has acted as a kind of neutral ground and vox populi for the active fanbase and anti-fanbase. (The last nominally-active EA fansite to date, She Fights Like a Girl, is actually an offshoot of WVC: one of the old admins created it as a database to answer “frequently asked questions” about EA.)
Wayward Victorian Confessions has now outlived every other EA platform, official and unofficial. Were it not for the continued existence of the “troll den”, what little fan community survives in 2024 would be non-existent, plain and simple. To quote from late 20th century Canadian philosophy: isn't it ironic?

I feel like [WVC] is the only place I feel any of that old Asylum community kind of feeling I felt before EA got so focused on the book. It sucks that it’s so full of unhappiness, and I wish she hadn’t poisoned the sanctuary she claimed to have built. It’s just kind of fallen apart, like a crumbling building. (🐀 2016)

CONTINUED IN COMMENTS

(Englsh is not my first language, I am sorry in advance)
I have always been a huge religion hater. Ever since the Bible readings in Kindergarten (I was 4 and still had more sense than most adults, I guess).
My family is Christian and they genuinely believe that the Bible is good.
A few years ago I decided to read the full Bible and what I read was not really a shocker to me - misogyny, racism, rape, incest, etc.
A few days ago and I actually quoted some of the verses to my mom. She, as a Christian, didn't believe me at first and even thought that I had been manipulated by the internet. So, I took the Bible a d showed her EVERYTHING. She was quite shocked.
The same evening my grandfather talked about some Religious community he was going to join in and my mother told him to shut up cause she doesn't want to hear about, and I quote "this disgusting believes".
I am proud to be correct, yet again LOL

If you're reading this I am going to assume one of three things:
A. You're MC-romance-curious and you want some great recommendations to get the juices flowing.
B. You're an MC romance hater and find yourself here to observe what paltry excuses I have for recommending this genre.
You’re about to comment "Good God Ochenkruto stop being so passe. 2011 is long gone, get with the times! We're into Mafia Dudes now, bikers are OUT!"
C. You're a die-hard (I refuse to type ride or die don't even fucking ask me) fan and want to see your faves here.
Before I get to the heart of the matter, a small preface:
I'm not here to debate MC romance as a genre, the depictions of biker culture or the feminist implications of reading these books.
Let's just say that I've run these ideas through my neurotic Judith Butler quoting brain and decided "Whatever, sometimes a romance reader wants to be stepped on by a sweaty guy with a beard."
Let those who have never felt the same way cast the first stone!
As criteria, my taste runs towards the medium-dark, heavy on grit, a 1% club and older characters. This might not be your criteria and I'll note books/authors I enjoyed that may deviate from this standard. I do not enjoy duologies, or trilogies about the same couple.
Lastly, and probably unfairly, but if the first book in a series has a virgin MFC, I will not read the series. It's not a fair rule but it's “me” rule!
Again, this is an opinion-based list, in no way am I casting aspersions on you if I'm critiquing your potential favourites, the reader's taste is not debatable, just the book itself.
Plus, I don't even have good taste, trust me.
Not that anyone needs to justify their tastes or their reading preferences but I enjoy these romances because they often center lower middle-class/working-class characters, frequently giving second chances to older MFCs, single mothers, and women who have blown up their lives and are trying to claw their way back to stability.
Generational poverty, the cracks in unfair systems, the struggle against that system laid bare and open, the hidden darkness of small-town life.
MC Romances give the "romance underclass" heroines their time to shine. Struggling women hanging on by the skin of their teeth, ready to do anything for those they love. Waitresses in trashy roadside bars with big dreams. Hookers without a heart of gold. Mercenary club sluts who want their piece of forever. Strippers who just want to dance. Runaways, former drug users, and women without housing or support. I want them all to find their perfect Epilogue.
The fantasy is that an outlaw, with sexy motor oil stains on his too-worn jeans is going to get you there, but realistically. A new used car, a fixed fridge, a place to live without mold.
Plus his forearms and rough voice and you know, commitment and monogamy.
Cream Of The Crop
{Reapers MC Series by Joanna Wylde}. Undisputed and unchallenged in balancing hot chemistry, dark-ish romance and small-town outlaw grit.
Please see this and this for more information.
Pretty Good
{Chaos Series by Kristen Ashley}
Not at all dark and not at all 1%.
And yet I dare you to read the big reveal scene in that book about the sad woman and the asshole she left twenty years ago and not cry like a loon.
Double dare you.
Warning: KA gets rightfully called out for problematic content, especially her portrayal of WOC side characters and this series has this issue in three of the books.
{Steel Bones MC Series by Cate C Wells}
More age gap than I like and less darkness than I prefer. Yet, her MMCs could easily also be wolf shifters and that's a compliment.
Bijou Hunter has a million small, three to five books, series in an extended small-town universe between West Virginia and Kentucky. Very slice of life, working-class ethos and extremely low angst books that span several generations of different chapters of different MCs.
TW: Some of the books and characters have the darkest and saddest backstories I have ever read.
{Dark and Dirty Sinners MC by Serena Akeroyd} is the OTT zany option. This is my "I didn't say it was good, I said I loved it" series.
Unfortunately, most of her MFCs are particularly unpleasant, she seems to excel at sassy heroines with no friends but makes up for it with very weird sex scenes. Again, I didn't say I had GOOD taste!
The "Plan To Finish in Full Shortly" Category
{Desert Dogs Series by Cara McKenna}-Recently a very nice person on this sub recommended that I go back and give this series a try with a different book. But I did not enjoy Book #3!
{Lock & Key Series by Cat Porter} - I got really sad reading the second book in this series and now don't know how to move forward.
{Riot MC Series by Karen Renee}- I'm willing to give the third book in the series a try even though the second one was a frowny face.
{Hell's Handlers MC Series by Lilly Atlas} - I don't have KU so I have to wait until I get a subscription again or some freebies fall on my lap. I medium enjoyed the first book in the series and would read more if I had the chance.
{Brazen Bulls MC by Susan Fanetti} - several interconnected series, but be warned this writer tends to kill off MCs post-HEA in subsequent books. YMMV.
{Torpedo Ink Series by Christine Feehan} is not what I would call very good, in fact, I think it's terrible. The overall plot makes zero sense, and the author tried to shoehorn the Russian mafia with paranormal abilities, kidnapped children turned super assassins into a small-town MC romance. It's the gooniest shit ever BUT WHY I AM STILL WAITING FOR MY LIBBY HOLDS?
Because I told you, I don't have good taste.
Aggressive Nope In Class of Its Own
Tillie Cole's Hades Hangmen MC - I think this might be the most blatant example of an author fetishizing whiteness while also pretending to "address" serious issues like race and class in America, all wrapped up with gratuitous torture porn. I read two books, skimmed a few others and realized that there is no female character that goes unassaulted and undegraded.
Additionally, I found that there is also no book where the author doesn't go overboard glorifying the MFC's "pale, almost translucent skin and sky blue eyes".
And I'm not even touching the redemptions of white supremacist characters matter.
The Rest (aka DNF'd series where I tried one or two books and gave up)
Geri Glen's Kings of Korruption MC Series - Flimsy
Glenna Maynard's Royal Bastards MC Series - Not for me.
Katie Wilde's Hellfire Riders MC Series - Not for me, first three books about the same couple.
Layla Frost's Hyde Series - Not for me.
Jessica Gadziala's Henchmen MC Series - Nope. Too dramatic.
Betty Shreffler's Kings MC Series - Not for me.
Erin Trejo's Soulless Bastards MC Series - Not for me.
Daphne Loveling's Lords Of Carnage MC Series - Not for me. Insta-lust.
Lani Lynn Vale's Hail Raisers MC - Too clean and overly innocent MFC in the first book.
Chelsea Camaron's Regulators MC - - Not for me.
Autumn Lake Jones's Lost Kings MC - First three books about the same couple. I am not three books interested in a biker and a lawyer. I am only one book interested.
Lena Bourne's Devil's Nightmare MC - Some deeply offensive content about a character.
Megan O'Brian's The Ride Series - Not for me.
River Savage's Knights Rebels MC - Not for me.
Ryan Michele's Ravage MC - Almost turned me off the genre completely.
Lane Hart's Savage Kings MC Series - Not for me.
Marie James's Cerberus MC - Too clean. Not for me.
Jamie Begley's The Last Riders - Holy slut shaming Batman! For a slut shamey genre this one takes the cake.
Anne Malcolm's Sons of Templar MC - I was extremely annoyed at these books and I tried to read three of them. Three!
Jordan Marie's Savage Brothers MC - Nope.
So that's it! Perhaps you'll find something from my list to your taste, or maybe you want to make a fiery defence of a favourite series/book that I unjustly dismissed.
Or maybe you hate all my choices and want to tell it to my beautiful, perpetually youthful, even though I haven't had Botox in four years because of IVF, forty-two-year-old face.
By all means, I welcome your ire.

I saw this pop up on Netflix and I was like Jeff Daniels? Tom Pelphrey? Diane Lane? Lucy Liu? Chidi!?!?!? Sign me up!
About 5 minutes in i thought 'wow, JD is playing a really on the nose Trumpian swinging dick business guy, it will be cool to start peeling back the layers'. But no layers were peeled. Once we started spending time with Peepers I got worried. Was Pelphrey overacting? Not really his thing, so what is l happening? Like the dude is just the most annoying and insufferable caricature of a hater, there is no way this is going to convince my brain this is a real person, even for 40 minutes at a time. So I thought, 'wow, these characters are bad archetypes to the point of surrealness, maybe this show is low key super surreal?'. But it was not. There was no surreality. There was no subtlety. Any subtext is couched about as well as a rhinoceros on a la-z-boy. Then there are the plot elements, like the horse show or the several meetings with the bankers. I kept waiting for JD's character to pull out the rug, but he just keeps on doing the stupidest crap imaginable which is also somehow totally predictable. And don't get me stared on the dude who 'assaulted' the police officer. How in the hell is the guy not going to take 60 days? He's got a pregnant wife and a place no executive assistant can afford on their own. He's going to make stand on principle and possibly lose years with his kid, not to mention the income to support them, when his only lifeline is an 'inundated' (quotes because he almost spends no time doing his actual job, when his employer is In a massive crisis) corporate lawyer backed by funds which will soon not exist. The show spends so much time using totally implausible scenarios the set up situations that are predictable and unsatisfying. I keep asking myself 'is this show so stupid it's smart?' Or 'is this show somehow really smart but I am too stupid to grasp it?'
Right now I'm just wondering how all these great actors each read the script, decided it was worth doing, and did it? Did the Netflix algorithm just come to the conclusion that throwing a stupid amount of money at David E Kelley and letting him do whatver he wanted would drive enough viewers to be profitable? How else can a show like this get made?

Read from April 29 – May 04, 2024
1/5 stars I HATED THIS
NOTE: I started out with an open mind read the first chapter, and then this turned into a hate-read.
That being said, no hate to anyone who enjoyed this book, I would love to hear what your opinions are, both on the book and this review :)
Let’s start with my ‘favourite’ quote:

“but it is impossible for someone who was not abused to become an abuser.”
Theo Faber, Psychotherapist

I genuinely do not understand what the hype around this book is.
To be fair, the second I read the words ‘TikTok sensation’ in the advertising, I should have known better.
The thing that struck me is that Michaelides is a SCREENWRITER, and this very much reads like a script, it felt like it was written solely for the purpose of selling the movie rights.
TLDR: This book wants to be Gone Girl so bad.
So, save yourself, if this is on your TBR, forget about it, read something else, ANYTHING else, read a newspaper, just don’t read this.
Longer rant Review, including the writing, characters, setting, and my main issues with this novel.

The Writing:

Is mediocre, at best. It’s very much in the style of ‘he said, she said’.
The best way I can describe it is that it reminds me of a middle-grade novel, where everything is stated clear cut and there isn’t much effort needed on the reader’s part.
There’s nothing wrong with that, for a KID’S book, but this is NOT written for a 10-year-old.
There’s long swaths of exposition, the chapters are between 2-5 pages long, we are constantly told who’s speaking, points are stated and then re-stated kind of like:

“Alicia Berenson has not spoken in 6 years” Diomedes said.
That’s right, from what I remember, she has not spoken since her husband was killed, 6 years ago.

So much needless repetition.
The reason I said that it reads like a script is because there is a lot of useless dialogue + endless descriptions.
Each character and setting is described in such needless detail, going on for entire paragraphs, for example:

Barbie was a Californian blonde in her mid-sixties, possibly older. She was drenched in Chanel No 5, and she’d had a considerable amount of plastic surgery. Her name suited her – she looked like a startled Barbie doll. She was obviously the kind of woman who was used to getting what she wanted – hence her loud protestations at the reception desk when she discovered she needed to make an appointment to visit a patient.

This character has been mentioned once or twice previously but she is relevant for MAYBE 15 pages out of 336.
Majority of the side characters are introduced like this, however, Theo isn’t really described in much detail beyond the ‘tall, dark and brooding’ trope and neither is Alicia, so the 2 protagonists are essentially blank slates.
The dialogue is so cringey, almost every chapter mentions the weather [this is set in the UK], like the weather is used as filler relentlessly.
There’s a bunch of continuity errors, the main one that comes to mind is that at the start of the book when Theo first enters The Grove [don’t even get me started on the name of the hospital, it sounds like the name of a cartoon villain’s layer, not a psych hospital] he is asked to give up his lighter and any other objects that could be used as weapons, yet he and majority of the side characters smoke CONSTANTLY INSIDE THE HOSPITAL.
The writing also reminded me A LOT of Colleen Hoover’s writing, and if that women has no haters, then I’m dead.

The Diary Entries:

Like I said, this book wants to be Gone Girl so bad.
The diary entries are written very weirdly, they don’t read like a journal, where you might get more of a stream of consciousness sort of style, they read like POV switches from 6 years in the past.
They don’t flow and amble like you would expect.
Examples:

Tears collected in my eyes as I walked up the hill. I wasn’t crying for my mother – or myself – or even that poor homeless man. I was crying for all of us. There’s so much pain everywhere, and we just close our eyes to it.
But I ruined the mood, stupidly, clumsily – by asking if he would sit for me. ‘I want to paint you,’ I said. ‘Again? You already did.’ ‘That was four years ago. I want to paint you again.’ ‘Uh-huh.’ He didn’t look enthusiastic. ‘What kind of thing do you have in mind?’ I hesitated – and then said it was for the Jesus picture. Gabriel sat up and gave a kind of strangled laugh. ‘Oh, come on, Alicia.’

The diary entries are not diary entries, they are memories.
People don’t write down entire conversations word for word like this when they journal, like “’
I had lunch with Martha’ he said”, you write it like “Gabriel had lunch with Martha today.”
I know why the diary entries feel so weird, they read like movie scenes, like a flashback.
Like the memory/subject of the diary entry should be playing in the background while someone narrates.
Again, this was a script, not a novel, I stand by this point.

The Characters:

Character development is frankly non-existent, the characters don’t exists as themselves, they exist to serve the plot.
They have no depth, and their motivations are lacking.
Theo faber: he was abused as a kid and is therefore damaged.
Chapter 3 was literally just an exposition dump of his entire childhood, just straight out of the blue.
It was like Chapter one: a report of the murder, chapter 2 further recollection, chapter 3: so my father beat throughout my childhood, I don’t know why.
Theo’s father was verbally and physically abuse, Theo attempted suicide when he was at uni, because the things his dad said made him feel like a failure.
But we are never told WHAT has been said, and therefore, we don’t see why exactly Theo would have doubts about himself.
Abuse shapes you as a person, if we got to hear his inner thoughts about what his father said, it would give greater insight into Theo’s identity as a character.
Besides that, Theo has a RAGING saviour complex,

“Unable to come to terms with what she had done, Alicia stuttered and came to a halt, like a broken car. I wanted to help start her up again – help Alicia tell her story, to heal and get well. I wanted to fix her.”

The book is filled with passages like that.
And besides that, it’s just filled with loads of nonsense psychobabble.
Theo is also OBSESSED with Alicia, the book tells us it’s out of guilt, but I contest and say that he’s just a creep who very much treats Alicia like a failed version of a manic pixie dream girl.
Alicia Berenson: Alicia is a walking contradiction.
We are told that she is beautiful, charming, sophisticated, but she instead comes across as an anti-social, paranoid shut in with serious co-dependency issues.
She has no friends, no relationships outside of her husband Gabriel, no hobbies, or interests outside of painting and having sex with her husband.
All she does in her chapters is paint, have arguments with people, have sex, and walk around.
Side characters: only exist to serve the plot.
Professor Lazarus Diomedes: the name alone makes me cringe.
He’s Greek, he has a lot of instruments in his office including a piano and a harp [which are never brought up after the initial chapters he’s introduced and he never plays any of them], he’s “unorthodox” and shunned, and he basically exists to be Theo Faber’s ‘yes man’.
Christian: stereotypical work rival who has a habit of calling all the patients bitches.
Yuri: He’s a psych nurse who takes Theo to bar and tell him that he and his wife divorced, and he fell in love with someone else. Fine fair enough, but does he approach this woman like a normal person?
No, he pulls a Joe from YOU and stalks and harasses her.
Yet later on THEO SAYS THAT HE IS A GOOD MAN AND THAT HE IS SORRY DOUBTING YURI. DESPITE INITIALLY BEING UNCOMFORTABLE WITH HIS BEHAVIOUR.
Then again Theo himself is a stalker so go figure.

The Setting:

The Grove is supposed to be a mental hospital used to detain mentally ill criminals.
Firstly, all the patients are female. It is never stated that the hospital is an all-female facility.
Second, we never get an idea of the scope of this place, there’s only one therapy room for EVERYONE to use, only 2 psychiatrists on payroll, Diomedes and Christian, 2 therapists, Theo and a side character named Indira, one psychiatric nurse, Yuri and an admin assistant, Stephanie.
The layout and descriptions are confusing, one area is referred to as the ‘Fishbowl’ throughout the novel.
Racism:
I don’t know if Michaelides has some internalized racism going on but every single foreign character has a habit of erasing their cultural identity.
Examples:
Yuri, the psych nurse who is Latvian –

Yuri was good-looking, well built, and in his late thirties. He had dark hair and a tribal tattoo creeping up his neck, above his collar. He smelled of tobacco and too much sweet aftershave. And although he spoke with an accent, his English was perfect.

This sort of backhanded compliment is considered racist, as someone who is POC myself, I’ve gotten this plenty of times and it always gives me the ick.
Jean-Felix, the gallerist –
He spoke with an accent. I asked if he was French. ‘Originally – from Paris. But I’ve been here since I was a student – oh, twenty years at least. I think of myself more as British these days.’
There were more examples, but these are the main ones I found in my notes.

Misogyny:

Firstly, the patients are all female, like I said earlier, it is never stated that it is an all-female facility.
This book is dripping with it, every single female character is either described as a manic pixie dream girl, a maternal figure, or a psychotic bitch.
The DOCTORS refer to their patients as bitches multiple times.
Example:

“She was entirely consumed with herself and her art. All the empathy you have for her, all the kindness – she isn’t capable of giving it back. She’s a lost cause. A total bitch.’ Christian said this with a scornful expression-“
Rowena gave a derisive snort. ‘Because Alicia’s the least responsive, most uncommunicative bitch I’ve ever worked with.’

Besides that, they are often compared to birds:

“I remember Mum and those colourful tops she’d wear, with the yellow stringy straps, so flimsy and delicate – just like her. She was so thin, like a little bird.”
“Alicia was sitting alone, I noticed, at the back of the room. She was picking at a meagre bit of fish like an anorexic bird;”

Alicia is also very much painted as a manic pixie dream girl in her diary entries, almost every page of her POV mentions sex, and it has no effect on the plot.
It was mentioned so often that I ended up keeping track out of boredom [I should have also tracked how often the weather was mentioned].
I think I have 15 tabs in 300 pages by the end of it for just sex scenes.
I don't have an issue with sex, but just like in movies when it gets thrown in for no reason, that's when it irritates me.
And of course the mentally ill woman with possible psychosis and BPD has to be shown as hot and a nymphomaniac.
Every one of her POVs reads like:
“Gabriel and I had an argument and then we had sex.”
“I went for a walk and fantasized about Gabriel.”
“I was trying to paint Gabriel but then we had sex.”
“I had an argument with someone and came home to wake up Gabriel and we had sex.”
I can see why this atrocity is a BookTok favourite.
Oh, and this line: [Warning NSFW]

“It’s still populated by sixteen-year-olds, embracing the sunshine, sprawled on either side of the canal, a jumble of bodies – boys in rolled-up shorts with bare chests, girls in bikinis or bras – skin everywhere, burning, reddening flesh. The sexual energy was palpable – their hungry, impatient thirst for life. I felt a sudden desire for Gabriel – for his body and his strong legs, his thick thighs lain over mine. When we have sex, I always feel an insatiable hunger for him – for a kind of union between us – something that’s bigger than me, bigger than us, beyond words – something holy.”

She’s out on a walk and salivating over 16-year-olds. Enough said.

Medical Malpractice:

Not only is a lot of the psychology in this book outdated, but in general, there is so much misinformation.
The psychology is so outdated, and it's mostly centered around Freud.
The biggest example I can think of is Alicia’s initial treatment, she has been put on Risperidone, which is an anti-psychotic prescribed to schizophrenic patients [Also prescribed for autism, BPD, etc. but that's on a case by case basis]
In the book, Alicia is shown to be completely out if it, she’s drooling on the floor, and practically comatose.
Risperidone is NOT a sedative [it can have sedative EFFECTS, but sedation is not the function] it acts on dopamine and serotine receptors and is used to reduce symptoms of schizophrenia, i.e. prevent hallucinations and help stabilize mood.
It should not be causing Alicia to be unresponsive.
[Disclaimer, this is just coming from my basic knowledge as a med student and a few quick google searches, if I'm wrong, please correct me.]
Moving on, Theo wants to treat Alicia but she’s on 16 mg of Risperidone, which is the highest safe dose possible.
He asks Christian to lower the dose, what does Christian do?
He stops giving Alicia 16 mg and switches her to 5 mg.
An 11 mg decrease. IN ONE DAY.
There is no gradual decrease, no safety precautions, NOTHING.
For context, Risperidone is prescribed in 0.5 – 1 mg increments.
This means that an 11 mg decrease is incredibly dramatic and DANGEROUS, it can send a patient into a psychotic episode, cause them to relapse and lead to withdrawal.
Christian being a psychiatrist should know this.
Patients are allowed access to a pool table without supervision, all the doctors smoke and offer their patients cigarettes,
Yuri deals drugs, Theo seemingly does no ither work besides talk to Alicia and play detective.

Depiction of mentally ill patients:

Throughout the book the patients are often referred to as animals, monstrous or zombies.
Examples:

“Her [Elif, a patient] face was pressed up against it, squashing her nose, distorting her features, making her almost monstrous.”
“It took four nurses to hold Alicia down. She writhed and kicked and fought like a creature possessed. She didn’t seem human, more like a wild animal; something monstrous.”
[Alicia is painting, Theo is watching]
“I felt like I was present at an intimate moment, watching a wild animal give birth. And although Alicia was aware of my presence, she didn’t seem to mind.”

On top of that, the word borderline gets thrown out A LOT, but it is never explained and is often derogatory.
Example:

[This is Christian the psychiatrist speaking, warning Theo about Alicia]
‘I’m just saying. Borderlines are seductive. That’s what’s going on here. I don’t think you fully get that.’

I am not against problematic writing, as long as it serves a purpose, but Michaelides is not talented enough to do something like this intentionally, and showing patients in this light serves no purpose.
Theo makes it very clear that he thinks that Elif, a Turkish woman, is ugly and rude, it is mentioned every time she is on the page.
This sort of depiction is harmful, mental health gets a bad enough rep as it is, again, I take no issue with problematic writing, but this is not problematic or controversial, this is ignorance.
The depiction of mental illness, coupled with the use of Risperidone, indicates, to me, that Michaelides did not do his research whatsoever.
He just thought of a cool idea and ran with it.
Oh, and lastly, let’s not forget:

“but it is impossible for someone who was not abused to become an abuser.”

No, just no. ANYONE can be abusive.
Correlation does not equal causation.
This is blatant misinformation and a very harmful message to send and I was actually so angry when I read that.

The Twist [spoilers]

The twist is the most ridiculous thing, and it hangs on by a thread.
I had already guessed that Gabriel was the one who Kathy’s affair partner was, and the entire thing falls apart when you realize that if any of Theo’s chapters were dated, you would figure it out immediately.
That’s a very loose basis for a dramatic reveal.
Yes, Theo is an unreliable narrator and I usually enjoy such stories, but this was just lazy.
I’m sorry, Theo followed Gabriel all over London and never ONCE saw his face, never heard Kathy moan his name when he was spying on them, not ONCE.
It’s poor when your twist relies on my suspension of disbelief.
Conclusion
- Poorly written, reads like a middle-grade novel. Michaelides is a screenwriter, and this very much reads like a script, designed to be easy to follow and direct.
- Horrible depiction mental health, both as a patient and in practice.
- Hollow, 2D characters.
- Misogynistic.
- Overall waste of time, save yourself.

I'll just quote the post from 'farms as I can't link it on Reddit, it's a good summary
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dm8vylyi_aY
So Chris did a livestream Q&A for his Ghost Doctor channel and it was pretty funny through and through. Chris kept saying all kinds of crazy shit and generally gave off schizo vibes the whole time, he is very adamant through the whole stream that he's better than every paranormal expert living today "I've evolved so much in this field that I can't learn from anybody anymore". If you enjoy listening to delusional schizo ramblings with a bunch of cope mixed in then I would recommend giving it a listen but the highlights are listed below.
Highlights: He has his Irate Gamer logo on the screen for the whole stream for some reason
0:47 Chris appears late to the stream and claims "Dark Forces" always try to prevent him from streaming and this was no exception. He believes there are spirits fucking with his computer giving it the "blue screen of death". He also says he is feeling sick and gives the reasoning "when you are as attuned to something like the secrets of the afterlife as I am the resistance is exerted grunting"
2:35 Chris has opened a new Ghost Doctor website where you can hire the Doctor himself to cleanse your house of evil spirits, demons, and other "dark attacks" like sleep paralysis, remotely. He also once again claims that the "Dark Forces" try to stop the website from going up. He offers a few tiers for his "services", the silver pack will get rid of shadow men and the gold pack will get rid of suicidal thoughts, because I know if I'm feeling suicidal I'm going to call the fucking Irate Gamer to save me and get charged $100. He also offers a book, a "Ghost Doctor Toolkit" and "Tar Water". He says once you buy these you can protect yourself from Dark Forces forever https://ghostdoctorchris.com/
8:52 Chris says he was attacked by a cloaked demon with chains in the middle of the night.
21:50 Chris claims that he is so successful and amasses such huge crowds at paranormal conventions that he's been banned from ever returning to them and that "household names" in the community have stolen his ideas to try to replicate that success. The example he gives is that he says he came up the term "parasitic ghosts" and he's seen others use that term without crediting him. He refuses to name anyone specifically. He goes into this subject again at 37:07 and he desperately insists that he knows what he's talking about and that these people are going to suffer in the afterlife.
24:40 Chris claims he has a new groundbreaking device that he doesn't even want to elude to because it's so crazy and he can't risk it getting out.
25:25 Chris says he talks to schizophrenics and tells them the voices they hear in their heads actually are demons.
26:43 Chris says that he's been told by other big names in the paranormal community "we don't want you here" (lol) He then goes on to explain that "once the genie is out of the bottle" that the "shit will hit the fan" and it will affect everyone, he references the situation he went through with AVGN and Youtube in the past and says this will be much bigger. And apparently according to Chris he's been warned by spirits to watch his back because things are going to come for him.
29:12 Chris tries to get viewers to send him money so he'll answer their questions.
31:00 Chris says that demons embed demonic incantations into chart topping pop songs and the most popular Youtube videos (probably the most sane thing in the stream to be honest)
32:10 Chris claims he witnessed a satanic afterparty at E3 and once again claims that Youtube fucked his channel in 2012 because he didn't fall in line (he doesn't specify what he means by this, I guess he means YT wanted him to worship Satan or something?) and warns popular Youtubers to watch their backs. He says Microsoft is the worst offender for these practices.
36:17 Chris gets distracted by his daughter wandering into his room and then goes on a rant about how spirits commonly try to attack his family and children and it pisses him off. He calls these ghosts low lives which I find hilarious.
47:30 Chris says he is visited all the time by spirits through the night who killed themselves begging for his prayers.
48:37 Chris says he doesn't care he has haters because they are going to be coming to him for help when they die and he will still not turn them down. What a nice guy.
51:58 Again, Chris desperately insists that he knows what he's talking about.
53:08 Chris says he can't talk about astral spiders because he's worried that other people will "steal his knowledge". What a nice guy. He later goes on to talk about them anyway and later says he believes that the tv show Stranger Things was "divinely inspired" because their interpretation of astral spiders was spot on. So essentially Chris watched Stranger Things and learned about astral spiders and then claims that if anyone else talks about them anywhere then they are obviously stealing it from Chris. What a hack lmao
1:00:18 Chris says the only other famous ghost hunter he likes is Zak Bagans (of course he is) but he is worried about him because he says Zak keeps getting darker and darker and he's going to pay for that.
Chris then ends the stream saying that he plans on doing these weekly from now on because "some crazy shit's gonna go down" and he wants to be on stream to talk about it.