I am the OP and this is going to be a long and unique story.
Last year me 21M and my gf 20F both jokingly brought up the idea of a threesome. We have been together for almost 5 years and our relationship has always had a little of trust and respect. We never call each other names and we literally never fight or argue, it was perfect. Fast forward to the threesome, my gf ends up picking the 3rd girl to join us. The boundaries we set were to communicate if we didn’t feel comfortable with something and making sure that we both felt respected still with another person in the bedroom. We end up “hanging out” with this girl 3-4 times and of those times we had sex multiple times. It was mostly me fucking the girl and I wasn’t giving my gf much. My gf and the girl only really gave each other oral, I will admit that I did not handle this correctly and let a “shiny new toy” steal all my attention. I did not have any feelings at all towards the girl, purely just saw her as something that I don’t normally have and got too excited? I will admit that I was definitely too friendly and almost treating the girl like my own gf. My gf didn’t really express herself until everything had happened and multiple times at that. I put a stop to the threesome thing immediately. Over the course of the last year till now, my gf acted as if she was just hurt and was trying to heal. She said she felt cheated on, felt like the 2nd option, she felt like I threw her to the side for a new girl we just met. When I’d ask her about it I could tell she was hurt but she made it seem like she would be ok and just needed time. I always apologized but I now know that I never made it seem sincere because I truly didn’t feel like I had crossed any lines since we had discussed our ground rules before anything happened. Our life continued pretty normally or so I thought. I did everything I could to make it up to her.
Fast forward to this year, my gf tells me that she wants to take some time apart so that she can work on her mental health and heal because it hurt to look at me sometimes (she is mentally unstable and has had depression in the past/still does). I know I shouldn’t have let the threesome happen knowing that she’s not stable but I can’t turn back time now. I decided to snoop thru her MacBook last month and I find out that shes been texting a bunch of other guys. This is not like her at all which really shocked me.
This is where it gets interesting because it all unfolds in a week. I find out that she cheated on me behind my back. She downloaded dating apps early April 2024 and didn’t tell me she wanted some space until mid April. I didn’t think much of it, just not spending as much time together. In her mind she was trying to break up, it was not clear at all and those words never came up. She cheated on me Sunday, April 21. While I was at home taking her Biology Final Exam for her (I’ll get to more about this in next paragraph) on Tuesday April 23rd, I try to talk to her to see how she’s feeling and also bring her clean laundry as I wash and fold her clothes. It was on this day that she made it a little more clear that she wanted a clean full break and not just “some time”. On Friday April 26, I wrote her a very heartfelt letter about how sorry I was because I didn’t know how much damage I had actually done to her. I went to her place to drop it off and this was the same night I looked thru her MacBook and found her texts. I confronted her after she got off work, we had a very heartfelt conversation with lots of tears. The next morning was when she revealed to me that she cheated. She had cheated seeking revenge and to satisfy her emotions. At first I was upset but was willing to accept it because I had already brought up the idea a few times to even the score so long as she told me everything beforehand. What made me go crazy was the following weeks worth of lies. She told me she didn’t do anything at first when I first found the texts, then once she admitted she did something, she said she used protection, I just found out this week she lied and we had unprotected sex afterwards as well. She told me her friends that are bad influences, drove her there and they all went like it was some kind of road trip. She eventually confessed that her friends did not take part in it after I texted her friends. There were at least 6-7 major lies in the story and for something this serious, I think it’s just plain messed up to be lying. If I gave you a chance after finding out, why not just keep it straight.
Now some very important details. Our relationship is very much one sided and I don’t mind. I pretty much do EVERYTHING for her. I cook, I clean, do her laundry, I manage 4 companies, I take her places, she is absolutely spoiled beyond belief. When we first met at 16-17 years old, her relationship with her parents was not great and I spoke up for her which was scary asf for a 17 year old. I helped her gain so much freedom within her own Hispanic household. I gave her so many opportunities within my companies where she was making $40/hr doing 1/2 the work of a fast food worker. After the threesome incident, she was very upset and depressed and we are both in school so I picked up some of her slack and helped her get A’s in multiple classes. I took her to Japan, she bought so much stuff and we had a great time. I don’t know how else to say it but I literally do everything for her, if you can name it, I’ve done it. From my pov, I’ve given her my life. So many opportunities. I come from a little bit of money, upper middle class Asian family. We have a lot of resources and I always provide her what she needs whether it’s food or financial support. She comes from a lower class Hispanic family. I feel so betrayed that she would do this behind my back after I’ve done so much to change her life. I called her selfish, useless, and ungrateful. The only thing I ever asked from her was loyalty and respect, she can’t give me that anymore.
The situation currently: 3 weeks ago she was begging me to not leave and that she will work on herself to be better for me. She said I can do whatever I want, even sleep with other girls. I told her to kick rocks, I would not give up my body and dignity to my own emotions. I’m not as stupid as her. As of this week May 19, 2024. She is back on medication to control her emotion and she still doesn’t want me to leave, she keeps telling me that she still loves me so much and does not want anyone else. I wanted to wait a bit to see if she was begging out of panic and distress. Now she is much more calm and isn’t breaking down quite as bad, still crying and the feelings seem more real and painful rather than out of terror and panic. Here’s the kicker, over the last year since the threesome, she became very rude and mean towards me. I’ll spare the details but it was like if I bought her flowers, she’d throw them on the floor and stomp them out. I knew it was because of what happened and she was bottling her emotions. But this took a tremendous toll on me especially since I work a lot and my time outside of work is all with her. I sleep only 2-3 hours a night. I cheated on her twice with 2 different girls over the last year out of sheer stress and trying to cope with the treatment I was getting from her. You may ask why didn’t I just leave, why cheat. How would it have looked if the threesome incident happened, she became depressed and I just left? The alternative would be to stay and just suffer thru her verbal and emotional abuse. I felt trapped
If you read this far I appreciate you and hope you can give me some feedback. Let me know if I need to clarify anything or give more detail

Over the last two years, I've been on a mission to get to the bottom of what's wrong with me. I feel like my doctors are either dismissive right away, or excited to try to figure it out, but quickly give up when no one test isn't off the charts bad. I'm seeing a neurologist in July. Wondering what other specialists I should ask for. I've already been to an allergist, a pulmonologist, a cardiologist who specs in electrophysiology and has referred me for a tilt table test, an orthopedist as a teen, and a gastroenterologist.
About Me:
Almost 30 years old, female. Married, no children, full time self employed business ownehairstylist. Of English and Mediterranean descent. No significant history of alcohol use. Have not drank since 2020. I don't use Marijuana or other drugs. No significant nicotene use, but smoked 1 to 3 cigarettes per day until 2021, switched to vaping the lowest concentration, quit nicotene in 2023. Generally healthy and balanced diet. 5'5", currently about 145lbs. 105/65 is normal resting BP, heart is high 50s to low 60s. No significant personal medical history aside from benign ovarian tumor resulting in emergency surgery due to torsion in 2017. Have had pelvic ultrasound within last 6 months, no findings. Normal abdominal CT. Have had two colonoscopies and an endoscopy due to GI issues, detailed below. PFT suggested mild asthma. GI Scopes found mild cell changes in lower esophagus, rectum, and chronic gastritis in stomach. Had MRI of brain which showed two small white matter hyperintensities. Normal echocardiogram, cardiac stress test showed elevated ejection fraction which may have been due to dehydration. Normal cardiac event monitor. I have some degenerative disc disease in my cervical and thoracic spine.
Blood panels usually show: - low- to low end of normal hemoglobin, potassium, sodium. - high end of normal levels of CO2 -high but not alarmingly high wbc (very high neutrophils but low lymphocytes) -thyroid (free t3 and t4) levels tend to swing from the 1.0's to almost 3.0 -estradiol low end of normal Have a normal ESR blood test, have not been given an ANA.
Symptoms include:
-Sudden, crushing fatigue (have almost fallen asleep while standing and walking) -Heart palpitations (both fast and slow, pounding ones) I do take propranolol 10mg as needed and it always helps within an hour. -Sudden feelings of impending doom/death/panic -Sudden lightheadedness and nausea -Sudden bloating and diarrhea 5+ times a day -Cystic acne, currently controlled with tretinoin -Migraines with aura, with or without headache (visual and sound distortions, cannot look at certain patterns (especially small stripes) or hear certain noises without feeling "out of sorts" -Vertigo (feels like I'm falling or about to fall over) -Extreme acid reflux that is never fully controlled even with Pantoprazole (burning is gone, regurgitation still a thing) -Dysphagia -Unexplainable weight fluctuations of up to 25 pounds within a couple months, both gain and loss. This has happened since age 12/13. My mom took me to the doctor for this when I was 95lbs at 13, size 000 and couldn't put on weight no matter what I ate after suddenly losing 15lbs for no reason, doctor accused me of bulimia and dismissed us. -Random episodes of shortness of breath, rescue inhaler works typically. Sharp, stabbing pains and dull aches in rib cage, back, neck, and chest Sudden aching pains in arms and legs or skin will feel like patches of it are burning for a few minutes Unable to vigorously exercise or I will have what feels like an adrenaline dump and have a panic attack. Usually walking up to 3mph is fine but sometimes it isn't. Hypermobile joints which have resulted in many partial and full knee, shoulder, and finger dislocations, especially in teens and early 20s. I've always been very flexible. I do have TMJ as well.
***Also worth noting: Throughout 2018 and 2019, I'd have random days here and there where I would spike a fever and be in bed all day with flu like symptoms, if I went to the doctor my WBC count would be quite high, but either the next day or by the end of the day I'd be fine. This went on for about a year and a half. Then in late 2020, I got COVID and everything started or severely intensified about 6 months later. Continued to worsen until early 2022, then again in early 2023 after a series of very stressful events, and has stayed the same since. Most of my above symptoms have been with me to some degree since childhood or teens, but greatly intensified post-COVID.
Family history of:
Mitral valve defects DVT Heart attack Unstable angina Atrial fibrillation Renal failure Heart failure Type 2 diabetes Hypertension High cholesterol Colon cancer Hypothyroidism and Hyperthyroidism Reproductive cancers in men and women Anxiety Depression Bipolar disorder Substance use disorder Fibromyalgia Chronic fatigue syndrome Ulcerative colitis GERD Lupus PMDD
Honestly at this point I don't believe I will ever get a diagnosis. I'm leaning toward some type of dysautonomia like POTS, an autoimmune or thyroid disorder, or even EDS.

I (30M) am the first young master of the Chao family whose specialty is assassinations and disguises.
I have many younger brothers and sisters I hate most of them. The only one I actually lov- tolerate the most is like most of my younger siblings charmed by a jade beauty let's call her Yin.
I don't mean to sound hostile but she is a whore of bad luck anywhere she goes men fight for her and women grow paranoid to the point of tearing their family relationships out of jealousy.
The same happened within my family not only my siblings but even my father (300M) joined the fray my mother and wives of my father grew more venomous than usual and in short there might be a civil war within our territory.
To be honest I don't really care as it doesn't affect me negatively in fact my business is booming as I own the blacksmithing industry but here is where the problem comes in.
The brother I tolerate the most went bankrupt by showering her with gifts and a beggar-like young man that killed many cultivators that tried to forcefully make her theirs crippled his cultivation when my brother demanded a hug at the very least.
I decided enough was enough I went and used the face tearing technique used to make human skin masks tore her face and made a human skin mask with it I of course kept it for myself it would be useful during information gathering missions and leisure activities.
I also killed that beggar-like brat his cultivation base was higher than my father but his combat skills sucked and wasn't experienced in dealing with soul-severing poison he died much faster while tanking the attacks I threw to the faceless ex-jade beauty who I of course killed and made a full skin disguise out of her.
Here is where the problem comes my brother is cursing me along with all my brothers even my father is mad at me the women of my family are defending me but their power is simply lower than their male counterparts.
So I ask you wise Daoists am I the asshole for killing the jade beauty that could have possibly caused the downfall of my family?
Any advice to solve this peacefully? Because I'm honestly getting annoyed with so many assassination attempts I'm considering taking the patriarch position for myself and killing my horny father and all my pathetic brothers.

If You're struggling to handle your Online Exams, Assignments or any other coursework, get help from Hiraedu and pay after the exam. Contact details for Hiraedu is: WhatsApp: +1 (213) 594-5657 OR Call: +1 727 456 9641
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I am very knowledgeable and proficient in assisting students in a wide range of mathematics classes. I can help students complete their homework assignments and other projects get an A on quizzes, tests, and exams (including proctored assessments) answer online discussion posts write essays & papers in MLA APA Chicago format and provide general overall academic help in each math course listed below:

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• I have a master's degree in Applied Statistics from a university in New Jersey, USA. As a result, I am very proficient in helping students with various types of Statistics courses including Biostatistics Business Statistics Elementary Statistics Probability & Statistics Psychology Statistics.
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• ANOVA Bar Graph, Boxplot, Dot Plot, Histogram, Pie Chart Bias Binomial, Exponential, Poisson, Gamma, Uniform Distribution Central Limit Theorem Chi-Square Test Coefficient of Determination (R^2) Conditional & Relative Probability Confidence Interval Correlation Coefficient (r) Critical Region Critical Value Descriptive & Inferential Statistics Effect Size Expected Value Experiment vs Observation Goodness of Fit Test Hypothesis Testing Interpolation & Extrapolation Interquartile Range (IQR) Kurtosis Left, Negative, Right, Positive Skewed Distribution Logistic Regression Mean, Median, Mode, Midrange Multiple Regression Nominal, Ordinal, Interval, Ratio I Population Parameter Normal, Symmetric & Bell Shaped Distribution Null & Alternate Hypothesis One & Two Sample T-Test One & Two Sample Z-Test Ordinary Least Squares Outliers P-Value Pooled Variance (Equal Variances) Proportion R^2 Range Regression Regression Line Reject & Fail to Reject Ho Relative & Cumulative Frequency Distributions Relativity & Reliability Right, Left, One, Two Tailed Tailed Hypothesis Test Sample Statistics Sampling Methods (Convenience, Stratified, Simple, Cluster, Systematic) Significance Level (1%, 5%, 10%) Skewness Standard Deviation& Variance T-Score Test Statistic Time Series Type I & Type II Errors Unbiased Estimators Z-Score

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• I am well-versed in helping students do well in Algebra 1 & 2 College Algebra Intermediate Algebra Pre-Algebra and I am very knowledgeable and proficient in the following algebra topics in alphabetical order:
• Absolute Values Circle Equation Domain Exponents Graphing Horizontal & Vertical Asymptotes Inequalities, Equations & Functions Inverse Functions Linear, Exponential, Logarithmic, Quadratic Equations Logarithms Maximum & Minimum Values of a Graph Number Lines One-to-One Functions Parallel & Perpendicular Lines Plotting Points & Ordered Pairs Point-Slope Form Polynomial Division Polynomials Radicals Range Rational & Irrational Expressions Rational Functions Real Roots Real Zeros Relations & Functions Slope Slope-Intercept Form Square Roots Standard Form of a Line System of Equations System of Inequalities Variables X and Y Intercepts

CALCULUS HELP:

• I am well-versed in helping students do well in Calculus I, II & III, Calculus 1, 2 & 3, Business Calculus, Multivariable Calculus, Vector Calculus and I am very knowledgeable and proficient in the following calculus topics in alphabetical order:
• Absolute & Local Maximum and Minimum Antiderivative Area & Volume Chain Rule Concavity Continuity Convergence Test Critical Points Curvature Curve of Rotation Curve Sketching Derivatives Divergence Test First & Second Derivative Test Fourier Series Implicit Differentiation Increasing / Decreasing Functions Infinite Series Integrals Integration by Parts Jacobian Matrix Limits L’Hopital’s Rule Maclaurin Series Mean Value Theorem Partial Derivative Product & Quotient Rule Reiman Sum Related Rates Simpson’s Rule Solid of Revolution Substitution Rule Taylor Series

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ATTRIBUTES THAT SET ME APART FROM OTHER TUTORS:

• I firmly believe that I have many attributes and skills that set me apart from other tutors. Below is a list of qualities that makes me an ideal fit to help you master your coursework:

I CAN AID STUDENTS TAKING PROCTORED ASSESSMENTS:

• Proficient in CollegeBoard AP Calculus AB, AP Calculus BC & AP Statistics exams.
• Skilled with International Baccalaureate Math Exams: IB Maths HL & IB Maths SL
• Can intentionally answer a few problems incorrectly at the student's request.
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• Have reliable software that can change my IP address to match the closest major city near the student.
• I have exceptional multiple-choice exam-taking skills. I have mastered the various techniques to make calculated guesses for the correct option in standardized exams such as the SAT & GRE.

I CAN VERIFY MY ACADEMIC KNOWLEDGE & SKILLS:

• I have no problem with requests to solve sample problems upfront to prove my knowledge & proficiency of the course concepts.
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• I can also provide, upon request, complete detailed calculations with explanations for solutions to the problems worked on.
• I am quite skilled and adept in using multiple modernized educational platforms and software, including but not limited to: Brightspace MyStatLab D2L WebAssign Canvas MyMathLab Blackboard ALEKS
• Can format term papers and discussion posts in APA MLA Harvard Chicago Vancouver OSCOLA IEEE format.

I HAVE PAID ACCESS TO OVER 15 STUDY-HELP WEBSITES AND MATHEMATICAL SOFTWARE:

• I have multiple paid subscriptions to a wide range of academic tutoring resources, including Chegg, Quizlet, CourseHero, Brainly, Grammarly, Study. com, Bartleby, Slader, Transtutors, Slideshare, StudocU, Turnitin, Academia, SymboLab, WolframAlpha, and Scribd to help guide to solve exam & homework questions that I may not immediately know.
• However, I am smart enough not to blatantly plagiarize solutions online but instead write them in my own unique words, formatting, & mathematical terminology.
• I have access to a very sophisticated graphing calculator and various mathematical software that provides step-by-step solutions to complex mathematical problems within seconds, allowing me to provide exact solutions to the student in a timely manner.
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MY AVAILABILITY & RELIABILITY:

• Depending on my availability, I can accommodate immediate tutoring requests, 1-24 hour, and 1-30-day deadlines.
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• I can also be available to tutor students for Fall 2021 Spring 2022 Summer 2022 semesters.

MY EDUCATIONAL SOFTWARE OF EXPERTISE:

• I am very knowledgeable and well-versed in a wide range of educational software to tutor students in including but not limited to: Acellus ALEKS APEX Learning Aplia Blackboard Brightspace Canvas Cengage CengageNow Connect ConnectMath Connexus CPM D2L Discord Edmentum Eviews Examity Excel Hawkes Learning Honorlock Khan Academy Knewton LimeSpring Lumen Maple MasteringChemistry MasteringPhysics MathXL (XL) MATLAB McGraw-Hill Microsoft Word Minitab Moodle MyAccountingLab MyEconLab MyITLab MyLab My Lab MyMathLab My Math Lab MyOpenMath MyPsychLab MySocLab MyStatLab My Stat Lab NCSS Open Source Software Pearson PERT PlatoWeb PowerPoint Prezi R Respondus Lockdown Browser with Webcam Sapling SPSS Stata StraighterLine Straighter Line WebAssign Web Assign Webex (Cisco) WebWork Wiley WileyPlus Wonderlic Zoom

SCHOOLS FROM WHICH I'VE HELPED STUDENTS IN :
As of 2021, I have tutored and helped students enrolled at the following U.S. universities community colleges county & city colleges schools for-profit institutions listed below in alphabetical order:

• A - C: American Public University System (APUS) Arizona State Ashford Brigham Young Brown Broward California State (Fullerton) Capella Chamberlain (Illinois) Colorado Technical Columbia Columbia Southern Cornell
• D - K: Dallas College Dartmouth DeVry Excelsior College Florida International Florida State Full Sail Georgia State Grand Canyon Harvard Houston Community College Ivy Tech Community College Kaplan Kennesaw State Kent State
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• UNIVERSITY OF: Alabama Arizona California (UC) Central Florida Chicago Cincinnati Florida Houston Illinois (Urbana-Champaign) Iowa Maryland Minnesota Michigan North Texas Pennsylvania Southern Florida Texas Toronto
• U - Z: UCLA Extension Utah State Utah Valley Valencia Walden U Wake Technical Western Governors Wilmington Yale

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I OFFER FLEXIBLE PAYMENT PLANS:

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TUTORING AVAILABLE FOR OTHER SUBJECTS:

• For other subjects, you can reach out to me, and I can connect you with one of my tutoring partners who can provide general academic assistance for the following subjects:
• Art & Design: Art History Design Film Studies
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THE OBLIGATORY "IS THIS A SCAM?" QUESTION:
Considering the fact that you found my contact information online, it’s understandable to be skeptical regarding the legitimacy of my services. Therefore, I’m willing to do all of the following to help you feel more secure in trusting me with your academic needs:

• 1) Speak with you on the phone and answer any questions you may have so that you have the opportunity to assess and analyze my tone, articulation, accent, diction, dialect, regionalisms, pitch, vocabulary, word choice, intonations, and inflections.
• NOTE: I’m a New Jersey-born Irish/Italian-American, but I have been told that I speak in an erudite & articulate suburban American accent with a “professor style” voice somewhat resembling the voice of actor: Ben Stein.
• 2) Agree to do some homework questions of yours upfront with the work fully shown in real-time to prove my mastery of the course content.
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• 5) Provide you with the contact information of students who have utilized my services in the past who would be more than willing to vouch for my skills.

MY REBUTTAL TO THE OBLIGATORY “IS THIS A SCAM?” QUESTION:
At the risk of sounding arrogant, I consider myself to be at least marginally more intelligent (both academically & socially) than the average person. Therefore, if I ever decided to suddenly risk prison time, risk my reputation, and risk enduring the wrath of modern-day “cancel culture” by scamming people out of their money:

• I certainly wouldn’t do it for such paltry amounts of money. (i.e., anything less than $1,000 per victim.)
• I certainly wouldn’t choose high school & college students as my “target audience” to scam, considering that most people without college degrees have abysmally low annual incomes. Why choose low-income victims when it would be much more profitable to target high-income, high-net-worth individuals earning at least six figures a year? I have knowledge in business consulting, and I promise you that a business owner would be a MUCH more lucrative mark than a low-income college student.
• I wouldn’t choose such a time & energy-draining method of scamming people. Also, communicating back and forth with potential clients is an absurdly long time sink since only less than 10% of all potential clients who reach out to me actually become paying clients of mine. This means that 90% of my time communicating with potential clients ultimately proves to be a colossal waste of my irretrievable time & energy.
• If you pay me to provide academic services and I don’t deliver, you can always dispute the payment with the payment app and easily get your money refunded. If I were in the habit of swindling money from people, then all of my payment accounts would have been investigated and be completely shut down by now. And I would have been permanently banned from opening new accounts. Therefore, the fact that all my payment apps have been fully active for years should be sufficient proof that I haven’t had people consistently disputing payments sent to me.

HOW TO CONTACT ME:
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• I take my work as a tutor very seriously, and I always aim to do my best to help my students excel in school. I have a solid and sincere passion for academic achievement, and with my help, I am positive that I can help students obtain very high grades with minimal stress and effort.
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I remember when I was young I was super afraid of my mother, I also don't talk to my mother.
You see, my mother always scolds me for asking 'stupid questions'. For example where to put batteries in, how to swallow pills from what I can remember.
I always get scolded so severely that I made me super super anxious I suppose.
I also remember I just couldn't point out where the sun rises direction from, my father would also severely shame me.
And then i guess in school I am always scared of asking questions in class for fear of being rejected.... and then it also manifested to college...
And then I go to a European university to study, I notice people are pretty open , chill about stuff. I mean people had such a personality. Yes I even witnessed a college friends don't know how to put batteries in myself (Wow if that was me my mom would have murdered me).
But I notice European classmates were so open about stuff. So flexible in their ways of communication. So assertive, so upfront, direct, unafraid to ask for their needs...
Actually, it's ok to ask questions and people will be willing to answer. If they answer rudely, then it may be their problem!
I think this childhood affected me and always became so timid and fear for the worse always.... my childhood... My asian parents use fear mongering tactics to grow me up... I don't understand why the communication between child and parent had to be SO STRESSFUL AND ANXIETY generating.
I keep having the concept that if anything bad happens to me then it is my fault. But that's not always the case.
Why does my family have to be so freaking uptight about everything? I feel I have not grown emotionally really.
Wtf... I'm sorry this does feel traumatizing.

I made a classification (and ranking) of music, based on levels of meaning.
I am curious to see what do you think of this system?
Level 0 - Noise, random sounds
(analogue in language: inarticulate sounds and screams that can't be written down)
Level 1 - Incoherent - stuff like integral serialism, which, while it has tones (it's not noise), and structure, such structure is imperceptible to humans, and virtually impossible to remember. It sounds like random sequence of well defined tones, but still random. You could listen to Boulez's Structures dozens of times, without remembering a single musical idea from it. Each time you listen to it, is like the first one. And it's intentionally made that way. Boulez said, the idea was to make the listener focus only on the present moment, practically deleting the past, erasing the memory, so that every sound sounds fresh, like new sound, unrelated to what came before it.
(analogue in language: random sequence of letters: weoquifgqwodihwqiudghiuzdgziuwqdbv
Level 2 - Coherent, but meaningless - music that is well structured, its structure easily perceived and often enjoyed by humans, its structure respects all the rules of making good music, sounds good, can be remembered, can be learned and enjoyed. But... it's basically forgettable. It's music that sounds goods, that speaks in a musical language that humans can easily understand, but that ultimately doesn't say anything. It uses good language, but says nothing. It feels kind of bland, generic. In that category could easily be included some less important Haydn symphonies, or maybe even, large parts of output of most composers. It's like most works sound decent, maybe they try to say something, but they end up saying nothing and people tend to forget them.
(analogue in language: "Shurdles have zandily dorfed little cangles all across the Handerland." Or perhaps: "Meaningless green ideas sleep furiously.")
Level 3 - Meaningful - this is the music that contains timeless ideas, you need to hear it only once, and you'll remember it for your entire life. As if such ideas always existed in Plato's world of ideas, and only waited to be discovered. Such ideas don't need to be particularly profound, but they are always musically meaningful. Your brain perceives them as meaningful and readily remembers them. This category includes all the catchy melodies in the world, in all genres of music. So, it includes Beethoven's Fifth Symphony, but it also includes "Jingle Bells". It includes Handle's Messiah, but it also includes "Smoke on the water" guitar riff. It includes Vivaldi's Spring, but it also includes Gloria Gaynor's "I will survive".
(analogue in langauge: I think, therefore I am. A penny saved is a penny earned. All work and no play, makes Jack a dull boy.)
Level 4 - Profound - All the works that are profound are also meaningful, but only some of the meaningful works are profound. Profound works, not only contain meaningful and memorable melodic passages, but also combine them in meaningful and profound ways, that often communicates some deeper ideas or emotions to the audience, or gives the listeners a unique and deep intellectual, aesthetic and emotional experience. I think top 10% of the output of famous composers belongs to this category. Examples: Bach's Mass in B minor, Beethoven's 9th symphony, or 14th string quartet, etc...
(analogue in language: Brothers Karamazov by Dostoevsky, Hamlet by Shakespeare, etc...)
I think music quality and artistic merit also follows this categorization, with Level 4 being at the top, and Level 0 being at the bottom.
So here's how I would rank some musical works.

1. String quartet no. 14 (Beethoven), Mass in B Minor, Symphony no. 3 (Beethoven), Carmina Burana (the whole work), Mozart's Requiem, Beethoven's 9th symphony, etc.
2. Spring (Vivaldi), Für Elise (Beethoven), Jingle Bells, Sweet Child O'Mine, Yesterday, Bolero, Radetsky March, O Fortuna, Hotel California, Schubert's Ave Maria
3. Random Haydn's symphony. Random Vivaldi's violin concerto. Random pop / rock song. Random Schubert's art song.
4. Boulez - Structures 2; most of integral (and not just integral) serialism stuff, A cat walking on a piano, a child playing random tones on piano
5. Vacuum cleaner sounds, washing machine sounds, car engine...

There are exceptions though.
Musical works can be profound for non-musical reasons, but this is a rare exception, and often a bad excuse for a work, that is in essence bad.
Perhaps it could be argued that John Cage's 4'33'' is profound because it communicates meaningful ideas about the importance of environmental sounds and how they can be considered music, or perhaps Boulez's Structures are profound because they represent an attempt to erase the memory of trauma caused by World War 2, and start anew. So their importance comes from general artistic statement that they tried to make (more like conceptual art), not from any merit of their music itself.
What do you think of my controversial ranking of Jingle Bells above "a random Haydn's symphony", and also a random Haydn's symphony, above pretty much any work of integral serialism?

Alright well folks keep asking an update and I have been meaning to, things went smoothish for a bit, but then got more fucked up again and then fine and then fucked again just this morning so here I am. Using you all to make sense of it.
Edit: here's the original post, sorry
https://www.reddit.com/relationship_advice/comments/1clivwd/i_36m_surprised_wife_32f_by_coming_home_early/
For the days after we talked a lot, she was adamant she wanted nothing to do with him, has no feelings other than friendship and now that she was aware both (a) the possibility of him trying (it is true I or she still don't *know* his intentions) and (b) my reaction to her behavior (leaving out his presence later with her in text messages to me after carpooling/putting our kid to bed, trickle-truthing me on her view of his possible intentions), she said she "doesn't want anything to do with him. no, just no."
She offered up her phone if I wanted to see their conversations, she did the location sharing thing on her iPhone. Was pretty clear that this was all some bullshit and she hates that this situation ever became a thing. She was losing a friend but was more than willing to.
We set some boundaries.

1. People over late at the house, just let the other person know. Obviously family doesn't count. Just to avoid any possibility of any inference, better to let each other know who is in our house that late, 1 on 1.
2. For people who may we feel even have hints of intentions beyond platonic, we should overshare with each other. (thanks helpful commenter) Not overanalyze every relationship but just things like "Doc X said this today, kinda weird" or "new guy at foraging seemed to like me a lot". Stuff like that.

I don't want to be a controlling person, I'm not that person but maybe because of my history I require more openness and communication about things like that in a relationship. She told me I was being too worried about her feelings/me being controlling and that was more than willing to do anything it took to rebuild any trust that was broken from the situation.
2nd session of marriage counseling and obviously topic came up first. I started to give a brief history but got interrupted by our child upstairs, I gave them some attention and came back down to continue. When I got to the part of coming home, taking a shower and confronting my wife, I can't remember who said what, but it was interrupted, talking happened and then the therapist said "and it sounds like (wife name) recognized what had happened and your past". Wife said she didn't know how close/similar some of the details were and the conversation moved on from there. The omission of his presence in text messages, trickletruthing, none of that was brought up.
But things were looking up, not sure I like the therapist but whatever. Things seem to be good. She seemed fairly contrite though I really was still bothered by the red and orange flags planted in my little mind garden.
Fast forward, a week? Something like that.
I fucked up. I guess I'm glad I did but I did fuck up. I don't sleep much, 5 hours max. Was up early, garden tending, made breakfast for little one and coffee for her, usual. I saw her work bag on the floor and I saw her journal in there. And I fucked up and I read it. I wanted to know if he (the 21M) was in her journal.
For some context, I read the journals of my late partner, who died over a decade ago, and it was a stupid horrible mistake. I read things that I shouldn't have, very raw thoughts and feelings, pros and cons list of me. Shit like that. Then, entries about the other man and her falling in love with him. And her thoughts about her conflicted thoughts about leaving me. Near the end, if I recall, she didn't know, she loved us both but we were so different. I kept the journals, still have them somewhere, but I did burn those last pages about him. I do recall telling myself that I was protecting future me. I'm glad I burned those pages and I'm glad I kept her journals but I don't venture to read them anymore. I will again when I'm older, to keep her alive in me somehow I guess.
Anyways, when I saw her journals in the bags I just grabbed them and I read the latest couple pages. Innocuous stuff until I got to about a month ago.
It said: "Texted all night and hike Monday"
Now that wasn't me she texted with or hiked with on that day, that was with him. When she forgot to get her prescription.
So that meant two things to me:

1. Who writes "texted all night" in their journal with someone they don't have feelings about? I'm not a journaler person, I don't like my thoughts enough to put them to paper, but that doesn't seem right to me. No name but def him, the dates match. I don't know, again, I don't journal so maybe anything can mean anything in there but what the fuck.
2. She had planned on hiking with him. She didn't tell me that. She told me of her plans going hiking after work to pass the time before the pharmacy opens, but never told me that he was going too.

In fairness, she told me after she sent pictures of the hike to me and his dog was in the photos. But she didn't mentioned they had planned it together, seemed spontaneous but I never asked I guess.
So yeah, I stopped reading. Kinda felt like I was shot with an arrow. Pretty horrible feeling because I thought things were going to be okay but I now I read this shit.
It was like 6am at this point, so I went on a run to clear my head and get the adrenaline out. Some tears too. Got home and they were still sleeping, when they woke up and we were alone I asked her again if she ever developed any feeling at all for him. She said no. I told her I read her journal. I apologized but I told her I read something and I needed an explanation.
She wasn't happy. She told me those are personal, her thoughts and not for other people. She was also confused as to what I could have possibly read about him/the situation that need explaining. She asked me to show her the entry, I did.
[context, they work overnights together]
Her response was: "Oh yeah, we texted a lot that night. He wasn't working but I was. You know I wasn't home right? I was working that night."
I asked why it was in her journal? And why were you were planning to hike with him but when you told me about your plans for that day, you never mentioned you were planning it with him?"
She said "Well I didn't know for sure he would come, we were talking bout it but I didn't know for sure" and the texted all night part "didn't mean anything", that journals are fragments, not full thoughts and she was just writing it
I didn't like that answers at all honestly. We had another long discussion where she reassured me it meant nothing, that it shouldn't be interpreted as anything about her having feelings for him. I believe her. I don't know how she journals so maybe this isn't far out of the norm, I don't know.
Have to be honest here, the trust I had in her, a lot of it left. Which is pretty much the basis of a relationship. A lot of people sent me messages after my post with spy cams and shit. If I had to resort to that, I'd just end the relationship I thought. Now here I am snooping on her journals.
Two days later, kid and I go out camping at a park for a couple nights (she's working). Have a blast. During that time away I decide it's important to me to know what conversations took place between them. Yes I snooped, but I think it's reasonable, at this point, to demand to know just what types of things are said between them. She offered earlier, I just never took her up on it because it was really obvious to me, she felt she had nothing to hide.
But after this journal entry thing, yeah I would like to know what 'texted all night' means. I thought if the conversation that night is just bullshit, sure whatever. If it's more, or that night is deleted or something, then I'll know. I honestly expected to read the messages, be reassured of her side of the story and move on.
So we got home yesterday from camping. This morning I asked her if I could read their conversations. Explained why and without hesitation she said yes and went to get her phone. Gave it to me and I sat to start reading.
They had been texting recently, mostly innocuous mushroom stuff, then a one/ a couple attempts by him to come ovego out foraging. I guess he was going to around our area (he lives an hour away) cruising on his motorcycle and her response to him was, as close as I can recall was:
"not today not allowed to have anyone at home. lol"
Alright what the fuck
She saw my face and asked what was wrong. I put the phone down and said I don't want to read anymore.
I asked if she had told him about my view on their relationship, or what happened or anything about him/heI. She said no. I asked again. She said no, he has no clue, she never mentioned anything.
I showed her the text and asked her why she would say that.
Why would she say "no one was allowed" at home? People are allowed in my home, that wasn't any of the boundaries we set together. He's been here, clearly. And why would she say that to him if she never mentioned anything like that to him?
Her response was that she meant she wasn't having people ovewas busy. She then told me "you were home that day...I don't get it". Yeah I didn't read the dates of the text but even so, why the fuck would you word it that way? That's not even close to "no, I'm busy today" or literally any other million ways to say I'm not available today. I'm not allowed to have people at home is entirely different. lol is entirely different.
I cannot see how on earth you get from those words to that meaning she says she was trying to convey. Maybe I'm wrong. She said she didn't mean it that way it's not her mother tongue. To be fair, English is not her first language. She's quite fluent and has learned it from childhood but it's not her primary language. We've spoken exclusively English together for the ~decade I've known her. You wouldn't know it wasn't her primary talking to her unless you had a good ear. But she's right, maybe it just is a mistranslation. She said it was "clumsy" and not meant in any way to convey anything more than "I'm not available today".
We talked all morning until she went to bed. She reassured me she loves me and only me. I walked through every red flag, every opportunity for her to be honest an open. I asked why she didn't tell me about his recent attempts to meet up again?
She said she didn't know she should have told me. She said she didn't know she had to replay every conversation with him to me. I said she didn't, that's not what I was asking. But I was asking for her to be extra open about her relationship with him to me and him asking to come over, twice, definitely would require her letting me know.
I told her she didn't respect me at all. I told her she didn't care enough to tell me. I told her she's not being open and honest with me. That it's not me and her against the world, that this relationship is something else.
She reassured me it meant nothing but now that she sees how that text could be read that way (as if they had discussed him not being allowed in our home, she still denies), that she understands why I would react that way. She was frustrated, she said "it feels like a little fly came into my life and shit all over everything", referring to him and his advances as the cause of what fucked this all up.
I reiterated to her, every step along the way, in which she could have been truthful to me and decide to omit information.
Texting all night and planning the hike.
Staying over late after carpooling together, after our kid went to sleep, texting me and not mentioning he was still over.
Trickle-truthing me on whether she thinks he's interested in her.
His two offers to meet via text/messenger or whatever (that I saw, didn't look more) that she didn't think to tell me about.
And her reply of "not today not allowed to have anyone at home. lol" whatever the fuck that means.
Her position is still the same, that this is all the bad coincidences and misunderstandings, misreading texts or journal entires, etc. But she says she loves me, has only eyes for me and better understands now where I'm coming from.
So.. there's my little hell I've got for myself.
Personal therapy starting soon but I guess reddit therapy will do for now. It's somehow therapeutic to remember this and type it all out. Sorry, looking back this is insanely long, it's too long to proofread if shits garbled. Took me all day to write I guess.
Last post I felt very overwhelmed by the response, sorry I didn't respond to a lot of comments or questions or clarifications. I'll try to do better here, since this is probably the final time I'll use reddit as therapy.
Thanks in advance. I guess I should ask in this field of flags is there some green grass? I trust my wife. I did. When she tells me she loves me and only me, I'm convinced. Or is this all as fucked as the plain reading makes it seem? Because it does seem quite fucked.

I’m gonna lay out the whole context here, and it’s 2 years long so bear with me. A TL;DR isn’t really possible as there’s so much important context to whether or not IATA.
We’ve been married almost 10 years and she’s from overseas. She came here through our marriage. We were happy and doing extremely well for ourselves.
The problem started to 2 years ago. My friends wedding. Afterward we went out and then went to another friends house to continue partying. At the party one of the wedding guests started having a pity party about how he’s depressed because all these happy couples are around and he’s single.
For context. This guy is weird. He’s disrespectful to women, capitalizes on captive audiences (waitresses most often), and is overall a loser. He’s got a good job but that’s about it.
My wife, listens to his sob story and says “I have a sister!” and immediately starts FaceTiming her sister. This is something I’ve said isn’t okay. We’re not tinder, and we’re not matchmakers.
Beyond that her sister has a history of treating her poorly. She constantly told my wife she’s stupid growing up, well into adulthood. She blocked my wife for a whole year because my wife called her and told her not to go on boats with men she doesn’t know. Told my wife to live like she doesn’t have a sister. For a whole year I consoled my wife a couple times a week.
Anyways we were both drunk and with people so I’m not gonna start a fight right there. I figure I’ll talk to her about it maturely later. So I do. In the meantime, I switch to speaking Arabic with her sister and tell her this isn’t okay and isn’t what she wants.
Her and my wife to this day claim I was happy and supportive. They claim I was too drunk to remember. But there’s a few things wrong with this. I drove home, I take drinking and driving VERY seriously and would never, ever do it. In fact, if I know I’ve drank too much, I’ll hand my keys to a friend before the liquor starts hitting, just to avoid any possibility of making that bad decision.
Secondly, I switched to Arabic. I’m white. Arabic is a language I learned. When I speak it, I speak it very, very deliberately and remember the conversations perfectly. I know exactly what I said.
Anyways, when I talk to my wife later, I’m told how it’s wrong to prevent her from helping her sister and how her sister really likes this guy. A guy she talked to for 5 minutes. I told her it’s wrong to think of it as “helping” her sister in the first place and that her sister is a grown woman who can find her own partner.
So my wife says “okay I’ll tell my sister to stop talking to him”. That was the end of it. Or so I thought.
A few weeks later I’m at a different event and this guy let it slip they’re still talking. Immediately I’m upset and text my wife about how she lied to me.
She said her sister was really falling in love with this guy and separating them would be wrong. She said she did tell her sis to block him but when her sis went into a depression she told her she can unblock him and talk to him, behind my back.
Upset I told her we need to talk about going behind my back and how disrespectful of my boundaries this whole ordeal was. She said “it’s okay I’ll tell her to block him again”.
Over. Or so I thought for the next few months. A few months later I again am at an event with this guy and this time he’s smart enough to lie about them talking. But I’m a salesman and a bullshitter. You can’t bullshit me unless I trust you. I knew immediately he was lying but I let it go. I did ask my wife and she said no they’re not talking. So I believed her.
Well, a year and a half goes by. In that time her sister and her fought about how her sister could come to the US. We said we’d help her but it’s a lengthy process. At the time I had little animosity toward her sister and would’ve loved to see her come here and be near my wife again. She wasn’t happy with that and said it takes too long. This is her sister’s mindset.
Anyway. Her sister gets a B1 visa in the meantime, temporary business visitor and wants to come visit my wife. Lies through her teeth about her intentions to the immigration officer, telling them she wants to stay 90 days. They approve her for 60.
So we file for an extension ASAP so she can visit for 3 months. Staying with us the whole time. I wanted her to have fun on her visit so I arrange for my friends and I to go out. This guy shows up. She talked to him and told him our plans.
Immediately they disappear into the casino and come back holding hands and all kinds of PDA. I’m fuming because I know she’s a conniving word I won’t say here. I don’t say anything though and we go through the night and I let it go so I can have fun.
The next day he’s picking her up from my house and they’re out for the whole day. The next time my wife is off work, same story. Well, I thought you were here to visit her? And that’s where I put my foot down.
I got told it was wrong to try and control her, wrong to try and separate them, etc. etc. etc. Finally she blocks his number and he calls from a separate number. I turn off her SIM card because I’m not gonna support her going behind my back in my own home. He calls me and tells me he really loves her and just wishes I’d accept it.
I tell him very plainly I will never, ever accept it because it all stemmed from him, her, and my wife going behind my back. Primarily my wife, as she’s the only one of the three I should be able to trust is telling me the truth.
At this point, I feel as if my wife had an emotional affair, although it’s with her own family. She repeatedly chose to go behind my back, against a boundary I had told her repeatedly before this situation at my friend’s wedding after party ever transpired. If that’s not an emotional affair, I don’t know what is.
So I tell him bluntly to not call me anymore and I’m not going to change my stance, and his feelings don’t mean shit to me. He started to give me a sob story about how we’re friends and he I should be happy for him and I cut him off and told him to save his breath.
My wife is upset at me for how I talked to him. Another emotional affair. Trying to protect the feelings of this dude.
The next day, while my wife is at work I’m eating lunch at our dinner table and studying schoolwork her sister comes to the table and starts talking to me about this guy asking if I talked to him and I tell her plainly I did and what I told him.
She goes into a story about how she really loves him, she’s an adult woman and I shouldn’t be intervening etc. I told her I agree I shouldn’t ever have been involved and neither should my wife. I told her to save her breath with any talk of her feelings because I don’t care. She started crying telling me I’m cruel etc.
I told her at this point I’m done being nice. I’ve been lied to for 2 years and it’s over. I’m done being my laid back self and I’ve been pushed repeatedly and I’m standing up for my marriage and my boundaries.
I did turn her SIM card back on so she could call my wife and I, her hosts.
The next morning I wake up to my wife in tears calling me to her sisters room. Her sister is bawling her eyes out and packing her bags to go home. I talk her sister into coming for a car ride with my wife and I to talk things out.
Immediately in the car my wife starts berating her sister about how she’s selling her for a man and a whole host of other things. I calm my wife down and tell her that’s not okay to say to her sister. Because against what they thought I don’t want and would’ve never wanted this to cause a separation between them. I know how much my wife values family.
In the car her sister tells me she really loves this guy and that she can see them being a family one day etc. etc. etc. I tell her plainly don’t ever bring him around my house, if they do marry and have kids, don’t ever bring them around my house, and don’t consider me her brother in law because I will never do anything for her again after she goes home.
My wife is shocked, she’s shocked and they both wonder how I could be so cruel. I said I’m over it. I’m over hearing about this guy, I’m over being used, and I will never again trust her. She said she understands and resumes talking to this guy.
A few days later we’re in the car going to a family event with my family and I get asked if he can come. I said no, very politely. I said no, he’s not part of my family. I was told how terrible I am, and my wife and her sister both jump out of my car in a bad part of Chicago, an area neither of them know.
My wife calls my family and tells them I kicked them out of the car. So my family starts blowing up my phone screaming at me. Once I explained the situation my family said they’ll come pick them up but I hung around and kept driving by to make sure they were okay. Eventually my wife calls me and says they’ll get in.
So I pull over and they open the doors and my wife goes “I’m scared I don’t feel comfortable getting in the car with you”. So I drive away pissed off. This is a 85,000 car in a bad part of the city where carjackings happen every other day.
I go park somewhere but keep an eye on them to make sure they stay safe. A homeless guy passed them and my wife calls me to come get her. So I do and we go home.
Again her sister packs her shit and cries that she’s going home. I tell her to relax, sleep on it and we’ll talk in the morning. She does eventually and in the morning she decides she’ll stay.
A week goes by and I hear nothing about this guy from her. My friends and I all joked about him and made light fun of him. He caught wind of it and cried to my wife’s sister who told my wife, who came to me and aggressively told me to stop and leave them both alone. I got pissed off because this was a private convo between me and my friends and if he heard it and got his feelings hurt it’s on him.
This spiraled into a huge argument with me, my wife, and her sister. In the argument I asked her sister plainly if she planned to leave at the 90 day mark. She said no.
So I kicked her out of our house. Her and my wife went for a walk and I yelled out the front door to get her shit to the curb before the walk before I do, because if she doesn’t do it herself it’ll be thrown on the wet ground. They both thought I was joking before then I assume. Her sister comes in and packs her stuff and gets out. I said if you plan on staying here illegally it won’t be in my house. If the choose is between here or the streets, it’ll be the streets.
She went to stay with the boyfriend and his parents. His parents must not have liked her too much because within a couple weeks they made them both move out.
This was in January of this year.
Since then, I’ve been repeatedly goaded into accepting this. My wife has tried to get me to visit her sister, etc.
It came to a head recently at a wedding we went to for another friend. Her sister and this guy were there. I didn’t say a word to either one the entire night and all was fine.
Except my wife spent the whole night at their table because he wouldn’t dance or do anything to have fun. She can’t handle the idea that her sister might find something she doesn’t like about this guy. She has to be there just in case the relationship goes on life support.
This pisses me off, obviously. She’s more invested in their relationship than she’s been in ours for the past 2 years. Grown adults.
Well, today she was going to her sisters house. She had 2 bags. An ulta bag and a discovery bag. I asked what that is, and she said it’s for her sister. She pulled out taco shells and said it’s just small stuff she wants her to try. But I could see through the bag and saw beauty products. I’m not an idiot.
I looked in when she went to the bathroom and saw a fucking armoire full of shit. I looked at the receipt. $300. I was fucking livid.
I continued getting ready for work and said “her husband can’t buy her that?”. It’s confrontational, yes. But I said it politely, and was open to talking about it.
I get met with immediately hostility. I never raised my voice but I made it very clear I wasn’t being nice about this or anything anymore.
I told her “maybe she could pay you back and find you a new husband”. I’m going to give her a choice. Me or her sister now. Because this has gotten fucking ridiculous.
We pay for her to come here. She hired an immigration lawyer apparently, but doesn’t have money to pay me back for the flight or even pay for the Ubers they take or anything. My wife is trying to make up for this losers shortcomings. He’s too much of an idiot to see that her sister is using him.
By the way, this isn’t her first fiance. It’s not even her first western fiance. She’s been engaged to at least 3 different guys. One from France, another from Belgium, and a third from Canada before this guy. She was looking to immigrate. He’s a fucking idiot though so, oh well.
My wife’s sister is very materialistic. My wife is fortunately down to earth but is so far up her sisters ass because she thinks if she doesn’t do everything her sister wants that her sister will cut her from her life again. Which is exactly what would happen.
I told her that’s on her sister. I’m not asking her to never talk to her sister. I’m asking her to stop treating her sister like she’s a child and putting their relationship before ours. Stop bending over backwards for a grown woman who will throw you away the moment you’re inconvenient.
But it’ll never happen it seems and it’s the reason I’m strongly considering divorcing her. I’m over this fucking shit. Oh, and by the way, my wife claims that she’s scared of me etc. now when she tells the story to other people.
I have never and would never hit my wife. I’ve never given her any reason to be afraid of me. So to put that out there on me is absolutely fucking bullshit and I’ve lost all trust in her.
AITAH?

Url: https://www.pluggedin.com/movie-reviews/kingdom-of-the-planet-of-the-apes-2024/
Title: Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes Movie Review
Author: Emily Tsiao
I appreciate this review of the Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes. The review of this movie effectively incorporates balance in that it highlights both positive and negative aspects of the film which allows the readers to understand an all-encompassing non-biased perspective of the movie. An interesting insight was when the author of this review discussed the ape's divide with the humans, and that although the apes are against the humans there are elements of respect and value. In regard to attitude awareness, this review demonstrates a clear awareness of the film's messages and motives. The reviewer notes the judgment of humanity's pride and the consequences of scientific overreach, as well as the themes of evolution and dominance of species. The review provides both negative and positive accounts for a full understanding, for example a negative aspect, “Mae prioritizes her own species above theirs, arguably making her no better, morally speaking, than the apes who follow Proximus.” However, there is a balance here that represents respect for both sides of the conflict, which highlights the significance of the dignity of the human person. Emily discusses the film’s representation of both humans and apes with an emphasis on the dignity of both, especially since the apes are very personified in this movie. The review highlights the respectful behavior of the character Noa toward the other species, opposing the violent and selfish actions of the character Proximus. In regard to the media key truth-filled this review discusses an honest assessment of that acknowledges both its strengths and weaknesses. The plot, themes, and characters of the film is accurately assessed, which gives a truthful and accurate account of what to expect. The film itself contains its darker and violent moments, but the review discovers and emphasizes inspiring elements within the plot. It mentions close familial bonds, acts of bravery, and selflessness among the characters, including Noa's compliance with his clan's laws to protect eagle populations, “We see close familial bonds. Several characters act bravely and selflessly. Noa is encouraged to show mercy to Mae by giving her a blanket when she’s cold. And, as you might expect, at various points different characters put their lives on the line for each other”. These elements of the film review can be inspiring to watchers and readers. Both the good and bad messages the film contains can inspire and teach the viewer. The review is clear and well-structured which can guide readers through the thematic elements of the plot. It effectively presents the complex details of the story providing a skillfully developed account of the film. This review incorporates the film’s message to present broader, real-world issues and it relates to common and contemporary discussions, which can allow people to learn from and apply concepts to current daily life, which portrays the film to be motivated by relevant to experience. Overall the review is insightful and detailed, giving an accurate description and reflection of of film from an honest viewpoint. The analysis is genuine and authentic, and it provides a good image of the movie and its hidden messages. Overall, this review appears to be very detailed, well-rounded, and insightful for readers, and it even incorporates the Church’s seven media keys.

~First~
Cats, Cops and C4
The Erumenta woman tries to fight even as he forces her into the cell, her natural fire flaring hot enough for his clothing to smoulder and him to mentally congratulate himself for his Undaunted Brand. It’s literally saved his fingers multiple times today.
Marlintine Spire is like many of the spires of Centris still reeling from the massive scan. Sure it had been legal, and both Living Goddesses upon the world had told everyone to calm down in their own way. But just because something is legal and endorsed by powerful figures does not make it a popular move.
“You burn any of your fellow prisoners while you’re in there and you’re getting a suppression collar.” He tells the obstinate criminal as he shoves her into the holding cell and slams the bars shut. The forcefields supplementing the metal bars flickers into place and the blast of flame she aimed at his face splashes against it without further effect. “Cute, keep it up and we won’t need a court hearing to upgrade you to a real prison.”
“He’s being serious. Stripper boy is playing at being a serious police officer.” Another criminal mocks and is subsequently ignored as Chenk leaves the area. He has other things to do.
“Ma’am.” He greets Chief Bowman as he slips by to head back out.
“Hold it human. I know your kind are endurance monsters, but you need to sit the hell down. You’ve been dragging in cult soldiers for six and a half hours straight. Your legal overtime ended a half hour ago.”
“Then keep a cell open for me as I keep bringing in more people. This needs to be quelled.” Chenk says and as he turns to keep going she grabs his belt and pulls him back.
“You need to rest.”
“The Spire is in the middle of a borderline insurrection. I can rest when it’s...” He begins to say before a sudden movement to his right makes his head snap around. Just before Vera the Takra-Takra crashes into him.
“Thanks for stalling him out Chief! Come on you goofy human!” Vera announces as she drags him down the hallway and into Linda’s Office. She tosses him onto the couch and then pounces onto him and pins him.
“Really?” Chenk asks.
“Yes really. You need to calm down. And I found a way to force it.” Linda states.
“But the Spire is...”
“You are one officer. Supersoldier on loan to the station or not, you’re still only one officer. The structural integrity of this spire only depends upon you when there’s a bomb threat and even then, only when it’s a chemical bomb.” Linda tells him. “Or do we have to restrict you to only being called out during a bomb threat?”
“No.” He says. “But people are still getting hurt and...”
“And they're the ones hurting themselves. Just please calm down. I know you’re skilled, but your sense of justice is just going to hurt you at this rate. Don’t want to leave a bad example for Amy now do you?” Linda teases him and Chenk groans in frustration.
“... I really should have thought things through before growing attached to that girl.”
“Oh probably, but it was adorable to see. The world crashing down on a poor little girl in over her head and then Officer Hero, Supersoldier from the blackest void of the galaxy flies in to save her.” Vera teases.
“Still, him being a supersoildier is a bit of a problem right now. Big man needs a mission, or he’s going to go nuts!” Linda notes. “Luckily! I called one of your friends on the ship. Soldier, you’re in position to requre a talking to from The Observer. However, the call is on hold, but you need to be here when it goes off.”
“That’s a dirty trick.” Chenk notes even as an Undaunted communicator is tossed at him and he catches it. It’s activated, it’s in a waiting queue and there’s no way he can go into the field now if he’s waiting for an official answer. “Very dirty.”
“Good thinking!” Vera compliments as she cuddles closer to her pinned target. Her hair spikes out in sudden shock as The Communicator then goes off to signify the call has gone through. “I jinxed it!”
“Specialist Chenk Barnabas sir!” Chenk answers the call instantly as he sits up and Vera scurries off him.
“Really? I put him on that waiting list to get him to calm down and stop working.”
“Specialist Barnabas, I’m one of numerous individuals filtering the sheer number of incoming calls to The Inevitable. You’re in the proper queue now, please state what you have been doing as a member of The Undaunted so that Observer Wu can better decide who to speak with.”
“I’m on loan to one of Marlintine Spire’s major police stations. Due to the overpopulation of Centris this means I have been acting as elite law enforcement over a population that exceeds that of many of earth’s countries.”
“I see, anything in particular that you’re doing?”
“I’m a chemical expert and accredited detective at this rate. I am the go to specialist for law enforcement when it comes to chemical explosives for a full ten percent of Centris Police Departments.”
“Any particularly interesting cases you’ve been assigned to?”
“Yes, one that is still being debated in court by none other than The Trytite Lady. It involves cloning, murder, mercenaries, numerous criminal gangs and a great deal of more nonsense such as massive prison breaks, fighting robots and Axiom effects so dangerous that even speaking about them in anything more than the most broad and general of terms on an open frequency is a punishable offence.”
“So you have seen a fair amount of what has occurred in the galaxy.”
“I’ve seen enough that I’m going to be very hard to surprise or overwhelm any longer.” Chenk says.
“Very good. I’ll just note this down. The Galaxy is absolutely insane, I’ve been fielding calls from people with like nine heads all speaking in concert and god damn lobster people and more...”
“That’s reality for you.” Chenk replies. “Always more absurd than it should be.”
“Indeed, stand by. I’m putting you into the next proper queue. It shouldn’t be more than a minute or two long.” The Assistant states and then the call shifts to simply display that he’s fourth in the queue now.
“Hunh. Faster and somehow slower than expected at the same time.” Chenk says even as Vera leans against him.
“Even when you take a break you’re still working.”
“You didn’t complain about me being an endurance monster when I planted this in you.” He says gently patting her growing stomach and she pushes him a bit in protest.
“Problem with getting the super-babies of doom is the wait for the baby.” Vera complains and he chuckles before the communicator activates again. He puts it in broadcast mode as Linda leaves her desk to sit next to him for support.
“Observer Wu I take it?” Chenk asks the Asian man who nods.
“And you are Officer and Operative Barnabas. The little summary in front of your call has my attention. Tell me, how are laws generally handled in the Centris space.”
“Centris is a massively overpopulated planet consisting of Spires and Plates. The Spires are the massive multi tiered towers that have two hundred levels each and each level holds enough people to populate any major city on Earth with ease. The lower the level on the spire the less funding, infrastructure and support it has with the bottom ten generally considered a universal slum or no man’s land. Law enforcement in those areas is nigh on impossible and the air itself has been described as thick and fetid. No natural light reaches those areas either.”
“And higher up?”
“Increasing amounts of wealth and support. To such a degree that the plates, which form an artificial ring around Centris are of such high quality that their most squalid and desperate places are at roughly the same standard of living as the middle fifty floors of a well off Spire. As you can imagine, policing all this is an outright herculean effort and every station, no matter how well funded, armed or endorsed is simply inadequate for the task.”
“What sort of crimes have you witnessed?”
“I’ve stopped terrorist conspiracies, torn down drug labs, found myself between assassins and their targets, I’ve stood in the middle of gang wars commanding people to stand down, I have tackled muggers, murderers and maniacs alike into walls and cuffed them. Not even twenty minutes ago I dragged a criminal who could light fires with her will alone into a cell, my jacket is still singed from it.”
“So the world is rife with criminality.”
“No more than any other place, there’s just so many people crammed in here that it’s constant, and that’s without the recent provocation that every single criminal organization received more or less simultaneously. Generally for every single idiot that needs a police officer to remind them why good behaviour is a good idea, there’s an entire bus full of people that didn’t even consider breaking the law.” Chenk explains.
“But when they truly commit crimes they don’t stop do they?”
“No, more resources, technology and Axiom means that if someone wants to break the rules they can break the very concept of rules. The last major case I was in before this flashfire of criminality was kicked off involved the sanctity of body and mind being shattered for the sake of mere greed by a figure so underworld infamous that for a chance to get either evidence on the person in question or ingratiate themselves to them we had an all out war break out in the station. One that if not for a quick trick, we would have lost.”
“And the trick was?”
“Switching out the prize for a disguised tracking beacon.” Chenk says and Observer Wu nods appreciatively. “I can’t credit on that though, it was The Private Stream that did that.”
“I haven’t had that fully explained to me. What is THE Private Stream?”
“I’m not the best person to explain it, but a quick summary is that it’s a shared persona for low profile work. Operative Jameson is the founder and original Private Stream, a persona that lets him go around while heavily armed and armoured while arousing no suspicion.”
Vera snorts in amusement. “Arousing... lot of girls find the aw shucks innocent routine to be arousing.”
Chenk slowly urns to her. “What?”
“You know what.”
“Maybe I don’t!”
“Maybe you do.”
“Could we focus please?” Observer Wu asks. “Now, as an Officer, are there any laws that you would find concerning about humans?”
“Yes, they’re usually location dependant thankfully. So the issue can be avoided. Furthermore there’s a lot of leeway given in laws where the traits of a species would make following the law difficult if not impossible. For example a human can generally get away carrying substances that are considered highly toxic or dangerous due to the fact that our diets contain what many people in the galaxy are nothing more than hard core poisons.”
“Hmm... Could you be more specific?”
“Well, this one won’t apply to you due to an amendment that Admiral Cistern was able to get allies to help him push through, but one of the most popular religions the galaxy over is the Gravid Faith, it has numerous denominations and variants and several of them create what’s called Arrangement Systems where men are required by law to have a hundred wives.”
“And the amendment is?”
“That if you are gainfully employed by governmental or military forces that you are exempt from the law so long as you remained employed in such a manner. You Observer Wu are the eyes of hundreds of Earth Nations meaning a government employee.” Chenk explains and he nods.
“I see. Any other exemptions?”
“Generally the Galaxy looks down on kinetic weaponry, so when it was pushed that humans wear weapons and cultural garb it was allowed through without issue. So humans are legally allowed to carry weapons like knives and pistols at almost all time without question. It’s... rather stupid in my opinion, but well it would be even more foolish for me to complain about something I’m outright benefiting from.”
“Hmm... any other laws?”
“They very much vary by location. Which are further influenced by the species of the residents, local culture, religion, political association, economic status. The name of the game is jurisdiction issues here on Centris. The local police departments all help one another, but always at the invite of the local officers who can actually confirm if what’s taking place is a crime or not in the local area.”
“Can you give an example of this working against things?”
“Alright, the easiest example is with drugs. There is no agreed on way to combat the spread of illegal narcotics. Some make the growing of the plants that produce what you want illegal. Others make the refinement of it’s fruit illegal and some make the selling of the drug illegal. So you can produce it all on the third Spire and sell it on the first two legally. You can grow the plant on the second and third spire legally, refine it on the first and third legally and that way you have a massive multi-jurisdiction drug running operation without technically breaking any law.”
“Hmm... that is a great deal to consider. I presume other such crimes can operate the same way?”
“Unfortunately yes. But that’s the problem with laws, you need to set where the boundaries are, but not make people prisoners in their own homes. There’s always a loophole.”
“Tragically yes.” Observer Wu remarks. “Now, I do need to speak to the others, but I have a few moments more. Who and what are you sitting near. The vaguely catlike woman on your right and the... generally human looking woman on your left are?”
“Linda is to my left. Partner and wife, the first actual police officer of us three. Vera is to my right. Wandering Warrior and wife. Linda is a Tret woman, they’re best considered to be humans if we evolved with Axiom helping us, a sister species to our own people. Vera is a Takra-Takra, she and her kind can shapeshift into the ferocious Warform and use it in battle. They pride their skill as Warriors and seek out stronger mates to empower the next generation.” Chenk explains before tiltiing the view down a little to show the pregnant stomach on Vera. “A work in progress.”
“I see. Congratulations. Although compared to many other Undaunted you seem a little behind.”
“I wasn’t aware it was a race.”
“Which is exactly how you lose the race!” Vera says in an amused tone.
“Indeed. Every conversation leads me to believe that I need to take an entire university degree in order to understand things. Thankfully your own is rather straight forward.”
“Really? Who are you speaking with next?”
“I haven't decided yet, but I need to speak with everyone in some way.” Observer Wu states.
“Good luck sir, I think you’ll need it.” Chenk says.
“Excuse me, is there a way to get a human to calm down and take a break? Ever since Centris was Scanned and hidden societies were exposed all over Chenk has refused to stop working. Is there any way to just get him to take a break?” Linda asks.
“It generally varies from person to person. But I would suggest guilting him. Emotional blackmail is a powerful tool.” Observer Wu says with a slight smirk.
“Traitor!” Chenk declares and there’s a chuckle from The Observer.
“Indeed. I’m afraid this call needs to finish now. Best of luck.” Observer Wu says before the call ends.
“So... we need to guilt you then? Okay!” Vera exclaims before her eyes start to water. “Don’t you wanna be there for the baby? Doesn’t she deserve a daddy?”
“Oh my god woman!”
~First~ Last

TL;DR: My friend insisted she was too sick to see me during the 4 days we went specifically to visit her, but it sounded like an excuse.
I've been friends with L for decades. We've been what I had considered best friends. Our friendship has had some ups and downs, but nothing too major. When I got married several years ago, I moved to a different country. But I still visit my family and my friends once a year and we keep in touch via text and video calls (about 4 a year). The visits and video calls all have to be organized by me, btw.
I am a forgiving person, so when she did not come to my wedding and, more importantly, did not even try, I forgave her because I understood it would've been a major expense to travel and pay for the travel documents for it. When some years later I offered to pay for her and her new husband's tickets to come visit me if they got the travel documents, she never said no but never said yes. But she never tried to get the documents. I still cut her some slack.
Recently L moved to a different, neighboring, country and she's now 4 and a half hrs away by car. I visited her last year in her new hometown, then a second time we met up with her halfway (on her side of the border), and this visit was going to be my third time seeing her in this new country.
The first time I visited I went for just a couple of days and it was just me. Her mother-in-law was visiting as well at the time, so her husband was busy with work and entertaining his mom. My friend and I had a great time going everywhere just the two of us. The second visit when we met halfway, was very quick, just a few hours because she and her husband had to catch a ferry back. I know she'll never come to visit me because it would require her to get the travel documents she has never once tried to get (even though she now has a permanent residency card for the new country, which would make it easier to get documents to visit me).
This time I drove up with my husband to visit her. We took time off from work to make sure we had plenty of time to sightsee and visit, and we paid for 3 nights at a hotel. My friend and I planned a lot of activities together. We had started planning a couple of months before the trip. I was thrilled and incredibly excited. It had been YEARS since I spent my birthday with friends. It really meant a lot to me. We were to drive up on day 1, see her on her own while her husband was working on day 2, go out all of us together on day 3, and have more fun together before we headed back in the afternoon of day 4.
Day 1 as we were driving slowly making our way to where she lives, she told me she and her husband were feeling a little sick, but that they were taking some Tylenol to make sure they were better by day 2 (when the bulk of the activities we planned together that did not include her husband was going to happen). I told her to rest well and feel better.
By day 2 she said she was still feeling sick, with a temperature of 37.2ºC/99ºF (which is still considered within normal range FYI) and sniffles, cough, and watery eyes, and she didn't think she could join us. I was very, very disappointed, but I thought it might be better if she rested. We switched around the plans for day 3 so we could at least have lunch together.
Day 3 she was feeling better but didn't feel 100% and preferred if we saw each other for lunch on day 4, the day we were going to go back. I told her lunch had to be at 1 pm so we could get going around 2 pm. I asked if there was any way to see each other before lunch as well since I had come all the way to see her after all. A lot of back and forth ensued where we planned to meet at 10:30 am because her husband had an online event earlier, but we could watch them have breakfast (I declined to have breakfast at that time given that we were eating lunch at 1pm), then chit chat and have lunch at 1 pm.
Day 4 she sent a message that she had a "fever" of 37ºC/98.6ºF and wasn't feeling well (again that is an even more perfectly normal body temperature). And she had the flu and didn't want to get us sick. She also said that the weather was rainy and bad and didn't want to get worse by going out in that weather (the day was sunny and clear). She sounded proud that she was telling me early enough that we could still get some sightseeing done. I was devastated to say the least. I took a while to reply thinking of all the things I could say, but I finally decided that if she just didn't want to see me I was not going to beg or point out the inconsistencies. I replied with the equivalent of an "Ok I guess". When she saw that, she sent a message about how she was going back to bed and how she "might" feel better if we wanted to stop by on our way out of town around 1 pm so we could say hi across the lobby while wearing masks. At that point, my husband and I had decided to just go home early because I was devastated and doubted she would see us. A couple of hours later, she tried calling, and sent tons of texts, again explaining that she had been sick with a fever and that the doctor had at some point (she did not see a doctor at this time) told her that she's contagious if she's coughing. And no, she was not going to be able to see us for the couple of minutes she had hinted at. I proceeded to ignore her messages as I was very upset and we were already driving back anyway.
The next day (my actual birthday), she sent a text in our group chat about how she was so sad she had been sick after all that planning, but happy birthday.
I don't know what to think. Was she avoiding me? Was she truly sick? If so, why tell me the not-really-fever temperatures? Is it bad depression? Was she having trouble with her husband and this was a way to cover for it? I kept telling her we could do anything she wanted, we didn't have to sightsee or go anywhere. She never suggested meeting at an open area to chat and not worry about being contagious until the very end. I am so hurt and upset, but part of me is wondering if this is one big cry for help. If it is, how can I help her? Do I tell her to go to therapy? That is a big taboo in our culture, so I don't even know how to suggest it. What if she really thought she was sick? Will hinting that maybe she had something else going on insult her? How do I move past this? She broke my heart a little.
We've grown apart geographically and in our beliefs/interests as we got older and we both changed and got married, but neither of us has that many friends so we remained best friends by default. Do I just give up on the decades of friendship because she couldn't be bothered to see me during the trip?

Hello fellow tutor aspirees, side hustlers, academic extraordinaires. I’m here to give you the scoop on the various tutoring platforms, how their services work, tutoring requirements, the types of students on each platform, and of course - how much you get paid for your time.
A little about me. I’ve tutored for a few months now on the following platforms: Varsity Tutors, Wyzant, and SuperProf. I’ve had a number of students on each platform, and it’s safe to say I’ve definitely realized the pros and cons of each one.
Wyzant
Money Info: You set your hourly rate. Wyzant takes 25% of it. If you set your rate to $20/hr you get paid $15/hr.
The Requirements: Each subject you tutor you have to take a 10–20 question multiple choice test on it. The test will be beginner to intermediate questions on the subject you’ve chosen. You only have one chance to pass the test.
The Pros:

• You set your own rate
• Tutors and students can freely schedule meetings on their own, rather than have someone assign you
• The user interface is better(mobile app, messaging system, teaching platform, etc)
• Students can largely vary(this can be a con too). You will get a wider range of students, who can be adults with various full time jobs.

The Cons:

• You are charged 25% of your hourly rate
• It’s very hard to get started as a new tutor. There are tons of tutors with a lot of reviews already.
• There are scammers(be cautious of people asking you to communicate off the platform)

Final Verdict
Wyzant is an easy to use platform that takes a while to build a student base. You’ll have to apply and reach out to students a lot at first before you start getting more consistent jobs. This can take a few months, so consider this before you start. The 25% fee is high, but certainly not unreasonable compared to other platforms.
Varsity Tutors
Money Info: Unless you’re tutoring GRE or LSATs, the flat rate is $15/hr, regardless of the subject. GRE and LSAT tutors make $28/hr. Varsity Tutors charges their students $50 - $75/hr.
Requirements: Most subjects do not require a test, however you do need to send in a video interview of yourself, mostly to confirm that you can speak eloquently.
The Pros:

• You are assigned students after declaring interest, so you can get started tutoring within a few days.
• Students are screened so you’ll mostly get students more prepared for lessons.

The Cons:

• A large amount of tutors will only make $15/hr, whereas they charge $50 - $75/hr per student. This can be a huge cut, and limit on pay, especially if you’re teaching harder subjects like programming, sciences, higher level math.
• The user interface is not as great. Basic functionality is there, but the overall platform is not aesthetic.
• You are legally not allowed to take students off the platform.

Final Verdict
Varsity Tutors definitely has the lowest pay amongst all the platforms. $15/hr to teach is what you can make at some retail jobs in the US. The platform can be better if you need to start making money immediately, or if you live in a country where the cost of living is lower. The amount you are paid is better for people who are teaching subjects that aren’t too difficult.
SuperProf
Money Info: You set your own rate, SuperProf takes 10%. The caveat, SuperProf charges students $39 a month to use the platform.
Pros:

• For tutors, SuperProf takes the least amount from your pay compared to other platforms.
• Students are generally more prepared because they are paying $39 a month to use the platform.
• The user interface is also pretty good.
• You can set your own cancellation policies

Cons:

• There are less students because of the monthly subscription fee.
• It’s very hard to get started as a new tutor. There are tons of tutors with a lot of reviews already.
• You have to teach your first two lessons free.

Final Verdict
SuperProf is very similar to Wyzant in that students and tutors can openly communicate and set up time with each other. The 10% fee is lower than the other platforms. But because it’s already hard to get started as a new tutor, and there are less students on the platform, it’s one of the harder platforms to build a student base.
Additional Notes
While all these platforms have their pros and cons. You can always consider tutoring independently. You do not need any licenses or business registration for tutoring in most places. Once you get a student base through Wyzant or SuperProf, you can take them off-platform and teach independently. The best part? You keep the money you work hard for.
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Olá! It's me! I'm Rickle Pick! Hello everyone!
So, I’ve been listening to some stories about Neckbeards and Kevins, as well as some Legbeards and Kevinas (Is that the correct term??). Well, most of the times I listen to those stories, I am reminded of some people I used to deal with in school. Specifically, this time, the tale of a guy, who I’ll name Roger Bacon for reasons soon to be explained. Sorry for any grammar errors, eu falo português! I also don't really know the posting rules here, so I'll just post it and see how it goes lol
This prologue is more of a compilation of stories that I think is needed before we get to the main shenanigans and awkward situations this guy put himself AND me into. If this generates any interest, I will post more specific tales of this weirdo! Long time lurker, first time poster, english is definitely not my first language and the whole shebang. I also never wrote a text this large, so go easy on me!
THE LIST:
Well, I guess it’s usual to make a list of people that appear in those stories, so I’ll make one just for you!
Me: Your basic musician-type nerdy theater kid white guy! Tall, thin with medium-light brown hair. At the time, I usually wore a leather jacket and sometimes a hat (not a fedora, a Chaplin hat. Also, where I live, hats are an acceptable attire choice lol). I kinda looked like the Once-ler from Lorax. At this time, I had just failed my second year of high school because of… honestly just lack of effort, mixed with undiagnosed ADHD and a bit of lacking in the ol’ confidence and self-respect department. At the time, I also was physically incapable of saying no and had a crippling fear of disappointing people.
Roger Bacon: 168 centimeters (or 5,5ft for the uncivilized) of pure muscle! Or at least he thought it was that way. In reality, he did have some muscles but was kinda chubby and flaccid. Not FAT fat, but athletic fat (???). He was mixed, light skinned, had shaved short curly hair, no beard (except for the inside beard) and his face was a special kind of oval, besides having a, "chiseled jaw". He always smelled like he had just gotten out of a day-long brawl with a french cologne wearing burrito. He wasn't an usual neckbeard, but he was a huge attention whore. Thought too much of himself, as we say here in Brazil: “Promised too much, delivered nothing at all.” His moto was: “Dude, I think she’s into me!”
For now, these are the characters, as the focus is to introduce you all to Roger Bacon as a person.
With the list over, let us get to the story.
FEBUARY 2018:
The year of 2018 started pretty badly for me. I had just been held back from 10th grade, had no friends and didn’t really know anyone. As most people know, high school in Brazil is quite different from America, as we start school in febuary and we share the same class with the same people all day, excluding language classes and extra-curriculum activities. This meant that, for the foreseeable future, I was alone. On the first day of school, I shyly sat on the last desk on the far right corner of the room, as I scanned my classroom to see what I was dealing with. A few groups of people sitting together, talking and greeting their friends, some loners reading or playing on their phones. The artsy girl drawing a beauriful woman on the white board. Some guy drawing a penis right beside her. Perfect balance. A normal classroom.
Another difference between our school systems is that we don’t really have clicks based on like Jocks or Nerds or Pretty Girls, it’s mostly people who connected in childhood or matched personalities, instead of connecting through roles and interests within the school. Not saying either one is better, just different. And yeah, the bullying situation is just as bad. I was bullied for my whole middle school and through first year of high school, and made a very specific group of low profile friends. So when I failed sophomore year I thought to myself “Screw it, if I’m going to be held back, that’s at least a second chance for me to grow an acceptable social life.”
All this elucidates how intimidating it could be for someone to join a new classroom full of mostly new faces. If you were unable to make a friend, you’d pretty much be on your own for the whole year unless an already formed group “adopted” you. So my mindset was to at least try and meet new people.
Well, have you ever said “I’m gonna do this thing I’ve never done before!” And got the worst possible circunstance you could get at the very first attempt? Welp, that’s just what happened. My strategy was to start small, and go talk to only one person at first, and then try to interact with a few of the groups as that was a bit intimidating (fun fact: we call “clicks “panelinhas”, spelled “pah-neh-lin-ias”, wich means “little pans”, because, you know, they’re closed groups, like a closed… pan. Idk, anyway), so I went up to this guy in front of me, and that guy was Roger Bacon.
He was almost lying on his chair, on a cool guy pose while messing around on his phone. He was also wearing a black sports tank top with a grey opened sweatshirt and the standard uniform wine-red shorts that were mandatory in our school, which made him look like a short and jelly version of Rocky balboa mixed with Kick Buttowski.
In real life, my name and his started with sequential letters, and because of this, we would sit near each other for the whole year, so I guessed he’d be the best person to interact with. I also KINDA knew him because we had basketball training after class in like 2015 and I went to the same church as him, in which I befriended his brother, Kevin, slightly, but didn’t have much contact with him because he had already graduated (I have some stories about basketball and church so tell me if yall wanna read them lol). I approached and gestured for him to take of his headphones (They were extremely loud, so I could recognize he was listening to the song In The End by Linkin Park).
Me: Hey! Aren’t you Roger? You’re Kevin’s brother, right?
RB, trying to sound stoic: “Oh, hey Rick. Yeah, it’s me… fortunately for you.”
Me: “What do you mean?”
RB explained: “Well, I’m the cool brother! Kevin was lame, and also had no friends.”
Me: “Isn’t he in a band with [insert band members]? They seem to be his friends…
RB: “They might look nice, but they’re all assholes. Don’t let them fool you! I’m the nice brother, Kevin is a dipshit.
To elucidate you: that band he said was made of assholes was the Worship band of the church we went to. It was also the worship band that I occasionally played the piano with.
I said, jokingly: “Guess I’m an asshole then! Because, ya know, I play with them more often than not”
RB: “No man, it’s just them. They’re just so infuriating! They never let me participate!”
Me: “Wow, that’s weird… I mean, I didn’t know you were a musician too! What instrument do you play?”
RB: “I play the drums, piano, guitar, bass and I also sing. But Kevin keeps me out because he wants to be the 'star brother'!”
I could tell he got a little heated, and went silent for a little while. I decided not to mention the band or his brother in his presence, 'cause ya know, that was pretty awkward lol.
I remember thinking to myself “This guy’s kinda weird”, because his brother was one of the nicest people I had ever known, and he also didn’t have the say on who played on the band, the worship leader did. I thought about confronting Roger with this, but I didn’t want to abandon my quest of finding a friend. And also, he seemed chill at first, if not a little insecure.
I was a little uncomfortable with this line of conversation, so I opted to change the subject. We talked a bit more about me having been held back, and he went on about how he was really good at math and chemistry, and how he could help me with my school stuff.
I was glad to have someone to help me, and even more, someone who apparently liked the stuff I liked. I remembered what he was listening to, so I commented on it and asked which song was his favorite, and we talked about Linkin Park for a bit. He said “In The End” was his favorite song, and then I mentioned I was a huge Linkin Park fan. He told me he was a big fan as well, but as we talked about it, it became a bit fishy. He never specifically said anything and just kinda repeated what I said. It became clear after a while that “In The End” was, in fact, virtually the only song he knew from that band.
That was the first time I noticed something strange, but only in hindsight, as at the time I just thought he really wanted to make a human connection. I remember thinking he was just excited to know someone who was open to talking to him, so I didn’t think anything of it.
Also, not everyone memorizes this stuff, and maybe he did only remember one song, for whatever reason, so I let that pass. I only felt necessary to include this information because it was, at least in some way, the first lie that Roger told me, a little sample, if you will, of what’s to come.
After we talked for a while, mostly catching up on our lives, the bell rung and our first actual class had begun, and I had the first-hand experience of this guy’s sense of humor. The teacher walked into the classroom and introduced himself as the new Geography teacher, and started a power point presentation about some of the subjects we’d be covering that year, saying “Please pay attention to this class, as you’ll need to know how our schedule will work”. Roger looked back and said “Huh, I guess this class is useless for you then, being held back and all, hahah”, which made everyone look at me and just kinda stare like I should say something, and he kept repeating the joke to anyone that showed any reaction besides just staring, adding “Amirite? Huh? Amirite?”.
I was kinda salty about this, but my people pleasing peapod brain couldn’t handle letting it show, so I just laughed and said nothing. I guessed it was a poorly thought out joke at first, but then Roger proceeded to make the same comment on every single one of the opening classes we had for both of the introductory days. There were 12 of them. He did it every time. Every. Single. Time. Sometimes he repeated it even louder, as if he didn’t think people heard it, because no-one was laughing.
“Ok”, I said to myself, “He didn’t mean to make fun of me, he’s just a little overexcited and probably is trying to make a connection and help me get acquainted to our classmates.”
Either way, I was very uncomfortable and annoyed.
Thankfully, this came to a halt when he was practically thrown out of the Literature class for interrupting the teacher mid-sentence while she talked about how important the first month of class would be for our comprehension of the whole subject. He made the joke four times. FOUR TIMES. I was beginning to think that I made a mistake, but well, the mistake was already made, at least I can try and understand him a bit, before judging.
The rest of the week went by and he didn’t get any better, but I got kinda used to it. In fact, I actually enjoyed having conversations with him at recess, when we could talk a bit more freely. And, as all things in life tend to do, it got weirder. Weirder in the sense that as we spoke more and more, I noticed a bit of a concerning pattern: every time I shared an experience I had, he’d share a cooler and more awesome almost equal experience back.
Some light examples:
I told him I went hiking for 2-3 kilometers on a trail by the beach. Then he smirked and said he went hiking for “at least 7 kilometers on a deserted beach that only his father’s company’s employees had access to and he saw a Gorilla. There are no gorillas in Brazil. Maybe in zoos, I guess, but definitely no gorillas.
I told him I was kinda sad because I had just ended a “thing” with a girl from my old grade. He “proudly” said he’s been dumped by his ex, Laura, after they dated for 11 months and made out aaaallll the time after school, and he even saw her “lady parts” once!”.
And then he went on to describe that shit for like 3 straight classes, adding more and more to the story every chance he had to speak, providing me with my daily dose of cringe in tiny bits of uncomfortable information at a time! Like a sporadic cringe snack! Sninge! Crack? Probably Crack.
ANYWAYS
There was also the time I told him the story of how I became best friends with a guy because we got into a fight in P.E.. We were arguing about some nonsense and he wanted to fight, so after he socked me on my stomach, I cheaply kicked him in the face so hard I almost sprained my ankle and then we started laughing (because I guess sometimes that’s all it takes). Phillip is my best friend for almost 10 years now.
Roger puffed up his soap dish chest went on for at least 2 classes worth of time about how he “beat up his last bully and broke both of his arms, and almost went to prison, but his dad is a lawyer and bailed him out”. Dude was 16, and I don’t think he’d need to be bailed out, but okay… He was, in fact, very badass.
Those are all approximations of actual stories he told me, because my ADHD memory is shit, but you get the gist of it.
My days were filled with endless stories filled with absolute bullshit, like a Gary Stu from a dying rpg campaign. (I have a story about a DnD game he participated in, but that’s for another time!)
Roger, not content with lying to me about anecdotal facts about his past that could be true but were almost certainly mostly bullshit (if not entirely), had a tendency to just negate reality when presented with facts in certain situations.
And example of this situation is the time we were doing a group assignment and a girl at least 3 meters in front of him dropped her pencil and he just kinda threw himself on the ground, picked it up and said “Here you go, Lana!”. She said “Thanks Roger!”, barely turning around and carried on with the assignment. Roger, then, turned to me with a sleek shit feasting smirk on his face and said:
RB: “Dude, do you think she’s into me??”
I contained a ridiculing laughter just in time to realize he was dead serious.
I said “I don’t know man… Doesn’t seem like it to me, but sure I guess.”
RB then straight up asked ME to go talk to her and get HIM her number. When I asked why shouldn’t he do it, he said it was “the wingman’s job to get the number of the girl” so that he wouldn’t “look weak for asking”
I said I’d do it, cause I genuinely wanted to see if he was right about her liking him (I hadn’t really understood the dynamics of the classroom, so I actually had no idea if he was actually right, just a gut feeling that yeah, he probably wasn’t).
I went up to her and asked for her number, explaining it was Roger who was interested in her and, as I pulled out my raging 2014’s Sony XPeria, I was swiftly interrupted by her delicately saying “Sorry! I have a boyfriend.” (She said the boyfriend part out loud, and stared at Roger)
I said “Oh, ok, sorry to bother ya!” and, as I was starting to walk back, I noticed that she turned back and glared at Roger. Later that day her boyfriend texted him, telling him that “He’s got to stop asking her out, and next time, if he wants to get rejected, he should come do it himself” He called him a moron. And then they both blocked him.
Well, that was embarrassing.
Despite having been turned down (for the 6th time now, I’d come to find out), Roger still maintained that she was “totally into him”, and it wasn’t just Lana. Any time he had even the smallest interaction with any girl, he’d say that they’re “probably into him”, or that “they made out at a party, but she was drunk and probably won’t remember”, or that they “sent him nudes last year but he’s already deleted them because he’s a good person, with morals”.
This went on for a while and, after about a month, Roger begun to dial down the crazy stories about how he’s a “badass and he gets all the girls but he’s single because he’s too good for them”. Until I started seeing a girl from another church I started going to. I met Janice () at the churches youth group, and we talked the whole time afterwards about lots of stuff. This name’s given because of her insanely similar laughter and demeanor of Janice from Friends. We clicked well and I was very interested in her, but my ADHD ass forgot to get her number, and remembered it only when she had already left.
When I told Roger, he laughed and said “I had just cockblocked myself” and that I’d “probably missed my only chance of banging a girl ever”. I was bummed, but clarified I didn’t really want to have sex before marriage or at least before making an emotional connection (I had just then begun to go to church, so I didn’t really get the rules, so it was more of a personal choice I always had in mind when thinking about dating. Also I met her at church so wtf).
He said “that was dumb” and, “even though he was a virgin, he’d dance the Devil’s Tango with the first chick he had the chance to”
“What about Laura?”, I asked. His face went from a confident smirk to an almost sad expression, and he blankly replied: “She didn’t want to, but I tried anyway at times. I even got a blowie once!” I let it go because I was very tired, as Mondays are hell on earth.
A few classes later, I went up to him and reminded him of our conversation and asked:
I said “Ooookay, but what about all those girls you told me were all over you? Didn’t they want to have some bum bum times with you??”
He was taken by surprise by this, and was visibly trying so hard to think of an answer for at least 15 seconds. He mumbled “Well…”, and like just left. Like he got up in the middle of the class, and walked away. Well that was weird!
He got back and I didn’t pry, thinking he had some kind of trauma, and I tried to change the subject.
I say “tried” because instead we were suddenly interrupted by a girl asking me if I was Rick. I didn’t know her or how she had materialized beside our desks, but later I found out that that girl’s name was Mary. She had blue eyes and was smiling mischievously, and I answered “Yup, that’s me”. She then giggled and said that “Anna wanted to make out with me after class”. Me and Roger were both very much taken aback by this, and I immediately thought to myself that this could only be some type of dare or prank (which it probably was), and was about to try and respond with the first witty joke that popped up in my monkey brain when, without missing a beat, Roger said “Rick’s already seeing someone!”. Mary was visibly surprised and said “Oh, you have a girlfriend??” with a look of disbelief on her face. Ouch. I explained that I wouldn’t say I do, I just liked a girl from church and we’re going to see a movie with some friends on Saturday, and that either way it was a pass on the making out sesh! Mary said “Oh, okay!” and started to walk back to her desk. I was about to make a joke and say that Anna could probably do better than me, when Roger interjected:
RB: “I’d like a making out sesh if she’s interested!”
Mary looked back with a visible “Lol, ew no” expression and just said: “I’m sure you would, Roger!”, turned away and sat down, laughing with her friends when she got to her desk.
Roger turned to me and said:
RB: “Dude, do you think she’s into me?”
This cycle repeated once in a while, so I’m not gonna tell you all of the situations that I felt like shaking him and trying to wake him up like Woody does to Buzz Lightyear in Toy Story. Exhausting, right?
Another thing Roger tended to brag about was that he did Martial Arts. Specifically, Kung Fu (Wushu). I would come to find out that, in the year before, he made a big scene to tell everyone in class that he’d just started Kung-Fu classes and, when no-one payed attention, he started a habit of punching the wall beside his desk, audibly making “hmpft” noises. When anyone asked why, he’d say he was training, and that his Sensei (Not shifu, he actually said sensei) had asked him to do that to strengthen his fists so he could harness all the strength he had, so one day he could put a hole through a wall with his fists.
He would also punch the school’s fireproof doors because, if you didn’t know, they dent pretty easily, and he would show me and tell me to bask at his strength and ability. That until I said I’d give it a try. He told me not to, because “I wasn’t trained” and “it could really hurt my hand”. I punched the door. It made a dent.
Roger said it was beginners luck and that he’s just a good teacher. I told him I really didn’t even make an effort to pay attention, the metal was just bendy and soft. Roger never talked about it again, and started only punching walls. For that, he would feel superior because, yeah I ain’t doing that. There were consequences for his wall punching habits, but I’ll address that some other time.
The last thing I’ll say about him for now is how clueless Roger was, how much he thought of himself and how he treated everyone else like they should (and would) respecting for what he told them, and not for what he showed them.
(I plan on doing another part eventually, with the story of how his disconnection with reality, lies, schemes and generally narcissist behavior eventually exploded back into his face.)
As a last bit of exposition of our circumstances, there’s an important part of our school life that fueled Roger’s social life’s demise.
Pranking was a big part of my class’ culture. There were also some people in my classroom who were bullied. The thing is: the bullies actually made fun of literally everyone else, which made it very hard to figure out if you were considered a target or just a colleague. They’d mess with people’s stuff, tie backpacks to the windows and hide pencil cases, but they would also do it to their own group.
Essentially, the only way to differentiate those who they considered normal schoolmates from those who were bullied was the frequency of the pranks and their demeanor in general towards those people. They would apologize for the pranks, ask to make up for it, buy you lunch, make jokes, try to laugh with you. I swear some of those guys were politicians in the making. Luckily, was very good friends with one of the guys in that group, I’ll call him Turkey, who was also held back a few years before me, and he liked my sister, so I was mostly safe.
Roger, on the other hand, THOUGHT he was one of the pranksters. Every time someone pranked him or anyone else, he would laugh knowingly, like he was in on the joke the whole time, and try to make jokes, only to further humiliate himself. And they would capitalize on that as hard as they could.
You see, Roger liked to portray himself as the “Mysterious-Badass-Quiet-Protagonist-Take-No-Shit-From-Anyone-Mr.-Steal-Yo-Girl” guy. This combo of personality substitutes was the recipe for the downfall of his popularity, and the start of the longest lasting pranks I’ve ever seen in my life, which will come if yall want another post. That prank is also the reason I named him Roger Bacon.
Because he was so into Math and Science (and into himself too lol) he also always wanted to look like the smartest guy in the room. The problem is that, as our first semester went by, it became clear that he wasn’t as good as he hyped himself up to be. Shocker, right? This was proven to be true when we were doing a chemistry group test, and I was paired with him and Anna, and we needed to calculate some entropies or whatever. He made a point of telling us to do all of the “easy ones”, and he would take on the more complicated questions.
The thing is, he was trying really hard to look like a genius, to maybe impress Anna, so every time he made a calculation, he would roll his eyes up and kinda vibrate a little. I guess he wanted to look like a genius mathematics robot, but instead he looked like he was trying to imitate an autistic person having a small stroke. I didn’t mind the Good Doctor amateur impersonation, because at least it looked like he knew what he was doing. Unfortunately, it really just looked like he knew what he was doing.
Each easy question of the test was worth 1 point, and there were 4 of them, and there were 3 hard questions worth 2 points each. We got a 4/10 on that test, and lo and behold, the only questions we got right were the ones me and Anna worked on. We were a bit pissed, not gonna lie.
Until the last time we spoke, Roger still blames Anna for his complete failure at this test for, in his words, distracting him because she was obviously into him.
But that’s just Roger, I guess!
I've got A LOT of stories about Roger and other neckbeards I've encountered, and I can't wait to tell them!
Until then, thanks for reading, and have a good one yall!

Hi I’m a female diagnosed L1 autism I work full time. Ive worked at my current company for about 6 years with a good performance record and good relationships with stakeholders around the business. I’ve worked around half my lifetime so am now in a place im adept at masking and mirroring social norms in corporate life.
I recently moved roles internally and got a new line manager. I disclosed to her early on i am autistic. I wasn’t planning to but she mentioned she had listened to a talk about neuro diversity and found it interesting . So I told her.
Initially she seemed keen to understand more but hasn’t followed up on it since the initial discussions. As I’ve interacted with her more I’ve found some of her communication style quite confusing and have been seeking more clarity and asking a lot of questions as a result. My natural communication Style can be blunt & I have had this feedback before on occasion especially with written comms eg email. I’ve never had any complaints just occasional past feedback when colleagues haven’t liked the way I express something . Ive taken this on board and when framed in a constructive way I have no problem with getting the feedback and using it to improve.
My new manager has expressed she has an issue with my tone on a few emails, she referenced the most recent where I had queried back some points she had made in an email to me about my performance goals. Some of what she had said didn’t logically make sense and was also factually inaccurate. I didn’t say this quite so boldly but instead queried and offered some further information which I felt was factual. She told me it had made her so angry she had to leave her desk and wanted to understand where I was coming from. I’ve tried to explain this was not the intention and why I had raised the points I did but she couldn’t seem to accept this, she’s now told me she now has concerns over my behaviour and fit with the team / role and worried I’ll offend stakeholders. There has been no bad feedback from stakeholders (not in this role or any role I’ve had at the company - quite the opposite. I would say I’m well liked and well known at the company)
She kept referring to my behaviour as stress and anxiety related but it wasn’t a stress response it was me seeking clarity. It feels like she has not taken into account my being autistic and essentially decided I can’t do well in the role and I don’t know how I can come back from this or what to do. She’s asked in future can I just call her instead of replying to her emails but my worry with this is not having certain things documented which I would want to do with performance goals .
Does anyone have any advice how I can move forward with this as I feel like I’ve screwed everything up and the role was going so well. Thanks .

I’m going to try to be brief here. I’ll provide details if asked in comments, but at the core I’m curious what is a reasonable way to manage boundaries with friends who were/are mutually friends with your ex-spouse who cheated?
For background, in 2020 my ex-husband left our 11-year relationship and 6-year marriage ABRUPTLY. No one else knows a private relationship of course, but it was an absolute shock to me and the rest of our community/friends/family. He was a loving husband one day and then brought up divorce the next. Within a month he left our home and then in three months we were divorced. Little explanation, circular rationale when I asked what was going on. I was traumatized and confused, and treated pretty shitty throughout his departure (again, sparing details unless asked).
I never got an apology. I learned about two months after our divorce of his presumed (he never admitted it) affair and new relationship. They moved out of state, married, are pregnant, and moved back home in my parent’s town. There’s been no communication since 2020 apart from some aggressive and accusatory letters from his current partner since (somehow a toll bill was sent to his address and she sent it to my family member’s home with a scribbled angry note, etc.)
Anyway, since he’s come home, he’s rekindled some friendships with just a couple mutual friends. These aren’t my closest friends but they’re dear to me. While I’m okay with that, my friend keeps posting him on his social media. So I come home from work to scroll to see my ex-husband’s face.
I’m happy and in a relationship and I KNOW IT’S BEEN FOUR YEARS, but the trauma of my ex falling off the face of the planet with no apology or explanation doesn’t exactly fade away. While I don’t want to make others feel bad, I don’t really get why he needs to post my ex-husband. Like?
Is it unreasonable to be bothered and slightly hurt? I muted his account for now but is it extreme to even question if this person means well for me? Sometimes I just wonder if people don’t understand, or if it’s still unresolved pain lingering.
Thanks all!

Hi I’m a female diagnosed L1 autism I work full time. Ive worked at my current company for about 6 years with a good performance record and good relationships with stakeholders around the business. I’ve worked around half my lifetime so am now in a place im adept at masking and mirroring social norms in corporate life.
I recently moved roles internally and got a new line manager. I disclosed to her early on i am autistic. I wasn’t planning to but she mentioned she had listened to a talk about neuro diversity and found it interesting . So I told her.
Initially she seemed keen to understand more but hasn’t followed up on it since the initial discussions. As I’ve interacted with her more I’ve found some of her communication style quite confusing and have been seeking more clarity and asking a lot of questions as a result. My natural communication Style can be blunt & I have had this feedback before on occasion especially with written comms eg email. I’ve never had any complaints just occasional past feedback when colleagues haven’t liked the way I express something . Ive taken this on board and when framed in a constructive way I have no problem with getting the feedback and using it to improve.
My new manager has expressed she has an issue with my tone on a few emails, she referenced the most recent where I had queried back some points she had made in an email to me about my performance goals. Some of what she had said didn’t logically make sense and was also factually inaccurate. I didn’t say this quite so boldly but instead queried and offered some further information which I felt was factual. She told me it had made her so angry she had to leave her desk and wanted to understand where I was coming from. I’ve tried to explain this was not the intention and why I had raised the points I did but she couldn’t seem to accept this, she’s now told me she now has concerns over my behaviour and fit with the team / role and worried I’ll offend stakeholders. There has been no bad feedback from stakeholders (not in this role or any role I’ve had at the company - quite the opposite. I would say I’m well liked and well known at the company)
She kept referring to my behaviour as stress and anxiety related but it wasn’t a stress response it was me seeking clarity. It feels like she has not taken into account my being autistic and essentially decided I can’t do well in the role and I don’t know how I can come back from this or what to do. She’s asked in future can I just call her instead of replying to her emails but my worry with this is not having certain things documented which I would want to do with performance goals .
Does anyone have any advice how I can move forward with this as I feel like I’ve screwed everything up and the role was going so well. Thanks .

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I (19f) and my bf (18m) have been dating for nearly 3 years now. It's a long-distance-relationship and we're dealing with it pretty well: we videocall every day, meet every 2-3 months and overall have good communication and trust in eachother.
I love him a lot and he can be very sweet and gentle with me, listening when I'm overthinking, supporting me with school and stuff, etc. I also adore being there for him, watching out for him when he goes to sleep, listening when he studies, calling with him when he goes to work, and so on.
However, over time (with growing up, valuing myself more) I've realized that I do a lot more for him than he does for me, here are some examples: - Whenever I go out late with friends he's always allowed to call me and I frequently check on him through text every hour or so, also going aside for some time to give him attention; when he's out and I ask if I could have him a little, he quickly leaves again, barely texts me and when I ask him if he could stay a little longer (like let's say 10 minute call) he refuses. - Whenever he has a bad day and I'm not stuck somewhere where I rlly can't text or call I try my best to make time for him, to listen to him and (if I'm able to) make him feel better. When I have bad times and call him, not even asking to immediately put away what he's doing at that time, he says he'd rather do something else, he's having sm fun with his friends, etc.
He's still often very sweet to me as I said, and he cares a lot for me. We do a bunch of fun stuff together and I just feel yo comfy around him, like I can fully 100% be myself. So just for y'all to know that he's not a douchebag. In fact I told him about the things that bother me already, and he understands where I'm coming from and says he's willing to better himself.
The only problem is, that over the past months I brought the topic up multiple times, and at the start it went better, but in the long-term it still never rlly vanished.. I don't wanna break up with him, as I do feel like maybe we can still find a way to fix this (it in fact used to be worse, and has gotten a little better), since our relationship is rlly special to the both of us. However, if it keeps going like this idk if I can rlly stay with him, as I feel like I do deserve to be more seen..
He also notices the problem when I tell him and is willing to put the effort into the relationship I deserve. That is what he's sayig now and what he's been saying the past times we talked about it, it's just that over time he kind of forgets about it and falls into old habits.
I know that he does mean it when he says he rlly wants to try. So I was wondering if anyone has ideas for me on how to help him? Or advice for him on how to actually make a change also in the long-term?

Basically title. I am 25 and I have no work experience outside of 4ish days at mcdonald's like 4 years ago.
I have depression and anxiety (diagnosed) and i suspect autism and adhd as well. I've been trying to find a way to earn money since i was 13. for 12 years I've struggled just getting more depressed in the process. I've decided i really would rather die than spend decades working for some corporation just to survive.
I live with my mother, but we are technically homeless. we sleep in my great grandmother's living room. our car broke down shortly after moving here and we only have my mom's disability that's around 800 a month to live on, but between bills and little treats to keep us alive we haven't been able to save up much, and I recently got hit with a court issued payment for an old credit card that's now taking up an extra $100 of my mom's money every month.
i don't want to die and leave my mother in this shitty situation alone. she's tried so hard my entire life just for me to not be able to meet expectations. I started college courses in high school but i was too depressed so i dropped out in 10th grade and really just kinda dissociated until graduation thinking I'd end up killing myself before then, so i didn't make any actual plans for life. i ended up accidentally sleeping through my SAT timeslot so i just never applied to any colleges. I wanted to get a working certificate but it was like $600 when i graduated and i had no job and no way of getting one, and my mom was at the time struggling to pay our $350 rent cause she herself was disabled with no disability back then.
I'm pretty creative so for a few years i made money doing whatever i could from home, trying to be patient about the "starting a business takes years" thing, but after about 3 years in the most successful thing i tried, the pandemic started and many people started businesses from home in my niche which basically took away the ability for me to stand out and do numbers that had helped me get that far. i kept trying for another year but sales were pretty much nonexistent and i got burnt out trying to keep up the work with no money.
since then I've kinda just been drifting by in life. after burning out while working at home i tried to get a job at mcdonald's which everyone said was a great starter job, but after a week i was left even more burnt out. I hate being around people and having to speak, ehich was so draining. customers are so vile to fast food workers, the bosses treated us like kids (even the ones that had long graduated high school), I am not good being watched or timed so i kept messing up, my bosses would pressure me to take early breaks and on my last day i didn't get a break at all, and every day after work my legs would hurt so bad I'd just sit and cry. i struggled even walking to the bathroom for a month after i quit, i genuinely thought i had done permanent damage to my legs and i had only worked for 4 days (not including the training which i never even got to finish). it was a nightmare and i never want to do that again.
I know I've listed probably way more information than necessary but I'm so desperate. i don't want to die, but if my options are work the rest of my life or end it early, I'm choosing the latter. but before i do that i just want to get my mom into a more stable situation. my grandmother is 91 and once she dies my mom will be on the streets. i don't want that for her. i just don't see any actual solutions.

So I am kind of in a sticky situation. I have been with my boyfriend for almost 2 years in October, and I absolutely adore him. Sometimes I just don’t feel loved, although I know he does love me he still fails to make me feel it at times. It’s a big lack of communication on his part and we hardly ever spend quality time with one another. It’s just so bad to the point where I mentioned to him a couple of weeks ago that I believe the sex is the only thing that holds us together. He claims one reason we don’t spend a lot of time together is because we are not interested in the same things. He likes to trail ride, ride horses, four wheelers, go to watch horse races, bike races, all things of that nature. He hasn’t even invited me to do any of these things with him, but ONCE the whole time I’ve known him and I didn’t go for other reasons. To be honest I am into all things I can do WITH him I don’t care if it’s sitting outside under a tree doing absolutely nothing. I know he knows this because I voice myself all the time. Honestly I don’t ask him for anything but a little time. He is a busy guy but I just feel like anyone will make time for someone they truly care about. On the other hand, there is this guy who I met a month after my boyfriend who I will refer to as “the neighbor” because he’s my auntie’s neighbor lol. So I met him November 2022 and he has been every bit of sweet to me since I’ve known him. Even after I got serious with my current boyfriend, and let him know that I only wanted to be friends with him, he (the neighbor) is still very kind to me. He’s tried to make further things between us, but even after making things clear that it wasn’t what I wanted, he is still so kind. He compliments me, always makes sure I’m on the right track with school, he’s also just as busy as my boyfriend, they are BOTH very busy men, yet he still tries and does make time to hang out with me. I just all around feel secure and actually wanted with the neighbor. I’ve been giving him the run around the whole 2 year that I have known him because at the time of getting to know him, I was also getting to know my bf. I just really don’t know what to do. I’m 22, will be 23 in July and my boyfriend is 21. I’m aware that we both have a lot of learning to do as we are both really young but I’ve communicated what was a problem to me a million times. I don’t think I want to be with the neighbor because I truly do love my bf but it’s like things aren’t going to get any better although he says we’ll work on it every time we fight about it. I’ve said all this to ask what should I do? Although me and the neighbor are strictly friends, I still feel guilty about hanging out with him because of how I feel during and after I’m with him (it’s a good feeling by the way). We hung out today and he wants to hang out again tomorrow. Do I keep trying with my boyfriend, or put it behind me and go where I feel wanted at? If this isn’t enough information, please say so. I can elaborate more.

Enhancing Communication in CI/CD Workflows

Email notifications are a pivotal component of Continuous Integration and Continuous Delivery (CI/CD) pipelines, particularly when using Jenkins, a leading automation server. They serve as a direct line of communication, alerting teams to build statuses, failures, and successes, thereby facilitating rapid response and maintenance of software quality. Configuring email notifications within Jenkins pipelines ensures that developers and stakeholders are kept in the loop, enhancing collaboration and efficiency throughout the development process.
However, setting up and troubleshooting email notifications in Jenkins can present challenges. From incorrect SMTP configuration to authentication issues or script misconfigurations within the pipeline code, there are several potential pitfalls that can disrupt this communication channel. Understanding the common issues and how to address them is crucial for maintaining a smooth and effective CI/CD pipeline. This introduction aims to provide insights into optimizing email notifications within Jenkins pipelines, ensuring that teams can leverage this functionality to its fullest potential.

Command	Description
mail	Sends email notifications from Jenkins pipeline
pipeline	Defines the Jenkins pipeline structure
post	Defines post-build actions
always	Condition that specifies actions to run after every build
failure	Condition that specifies actions to run if the build fails
steps	Defines a series of one or more steps to be executed in a stage

Optimizing Jenkins Pipeline Notifications

Email notifications within Jenkins pipelines are not just about informing team members of a build's success or failure; they represent a critical feedback loop that supports the agile development process. By integrating email notifications, teams can immediately identify and address issues, maintain high-quality code, and ensure that software deployments are done seamlessly. The effectiveness of these notifications, however, depends on their proper configuration and the ability of team members to act on the information provided. This involves not only setting up the right triggers for emails but also customizing the content of the notifications to include relevant information such as build status, logs, and direct links to the build results for quick access.
To further enhance the utility of email notifications, Jenkins allows for the configuration of conditional notifications. This means that emails can be tailored to specific events within the pipeline, such as failures in critical stages or warnings when certain thresholds are met. Advanced configurations can include scripting within the Jenkinsfile to dynamically adjust recipients based on the nature of the build or change, ensuring that the right stakeholders are informed at the right time. Moreover, incorporating best practices such as using email filters or integrating with collaboration tools can help manage the flow of notifications, preventing information overload and ensuring that teams remain focused on critical issues. Ultimately, a well-configured email notification system within Jenkins pipelines not only keeps teams informed but also enhances collaboration and the continuous improvement of development practices.

Configuring Email Notifications in Jenkins Pipeline

Jenkinsfile Groovy syntax

pipeline { agent any stages { stage('Build') { steps { echo 'Building...' } } stage('Test') { steps { echo 'Testing...' } } stage('Deploy') { steps { echo 'Deploying...' } } } post { always { mail to: 'team@example.com', subject: "Build ${currentBuild.fullDisplayName}", body: "The build was ${currentBuild.result}: Check console output at ${env.BUILD_URL} to view the results." } failure { mail to: 'team@example.com', subject: "Failed Build ${currentBuild.fullDisplayName}", body: "The build FAILED: Check console output at ${env.BUILD_URL} to view the results." } } } 

Enhancing Jenkins Pipeline Through Effective Email Notifications

Implementing email notifications in Jenkins pipelines plays a crucial role in maintaining continuous integration and deployment processes. These notifications serve as an essential tool for developers and operations teams to stay updated on the build and deployment statuses, facilitating immediate action when issues arise. Properly configured, email alerts can drastically reduce downtime and ensure that all stakeholders are informed of the pipeline's health. The configuration process involves specifying the SMTP server details, setting up authentication if required, and defining the conditions under which notifications should be sent, such as on failure, success, or unstable builds.
Moreover, the customization of email content to include specific details about the build process can significantly aid in troubleshooting efforts. By providing links to the build logs, summaries of the changes that triggered the build, and even metrics on build duration, teams can quickly identify and rectify issues. This level of detail is invaluable in fast-paced development environments where time is of the essence. Additionally, integrating advanced features like email throttling and failure analysis reports can further enhance the pipeline's efficiency by ensuring that teams are not overwhelmed with notifications and that they receive meaningful insights into the build process.

Top Jenkins Email Notification Queries

1. Question: How do I configure email notifications in Jenkins?
2. Answer: Configure email notifications in Jenkins by navigating to Manage Jenkins > Configure System > E-mail Notification, where you can enter your SMTP server details and authentication information.
3. Question: Can email notifications be sent based on the build status?
4. Answer: Yes, Jenkins allows you to configure email notifications to be sent on various build statuses, such as success, failure, or unstable.
5. Question: How can I customize the content of the email notifications?
6. Answer: Customize email content using the Email-ext plugin, which offers various tokens for including dynamic content such as build logs, status, and environment variables.
7. Question: Is it possible to send emails to different recipients based on the build outcome?
8. Answer: Yes, with the Email-ext plugin, you can configure conditional recipient lists based on the build outcome or other criteria.
9. Question: How do I troubleshoot email notification issues in Jenkins?
10. Answer: Troubleshoot email notification issues by checking the Jenkins system log, verifying SMTP server settings, and ensuring the Email-ext plugin is correctly configured.
11. Question: Can Jenkins integrate with third-party email services?
12. Answer: Yes, Jenkins can integrate with third-party email services by configuring the appropriate SMTP settings for the service you wish to use.
13. Question: How do I limit the number of email notifications sent during a certain period?
14. Answer: Limit email notifications by configuring the throttle settings in the Email-ext plugin, which can restrict the number of emails sent over a defined period.
15. Question: Are email notifications supported in pipeline scripts?
16. Answer: Yes, email notifications can be configured directly within pipeline scripts using the `mail` step.
17. Question: How can I add attachments to email notifications?
18. Answer: Attach files to email notifications using the `attachmentsPattern` parameter in the Email-ext plugin, specifying the file patterns to include.
19. Question: Can email notifications include links to the build console output?
20. Answer: Yes, include links to the build console output in emails by using the `$BUILD_URL` environment variable in the email body.

Final Thoughts on Jenkins Pipeline Notifications

Implementing a robust email notification system within Jenkins pipelines is more than just a convenience—it's a necessity for teams committed to agile development and continuous integration. Proper configuration and customization of these notifications can dramatically improve the development workflow, enabling teams to respond swiftly to build outcomes and maintain high-quality software delivery. As we've explored, Jenkins offers extensive capabilities for tailoring notifications to meet diverse project needs, from conditional alerts based on build status to detailed messages that include logs and direct links to results. However, the true power of email notifications lies in their ability to facilitate immediate and effective communication among team members, bridging the gap between automated processes and human intervention. By leveraging these tools wisely, teams can not only enhance their operational efficiency but also foster a culture of transparency and collaboration, ensuring that everyone is aligned and informed at every stage of the development cycle.
https://www.tempmail.us.com/en/jenkins/resolving-jenkins-pipeline-email-notification-issues