Effective treatmnet planning for mood disorders
Taking it day by day
2017.03.21 03:29 AnthonyElMedic Taking it day by day
A subreddit created for those suffering from mental health problems to share and learn new coping skills.
2024.05.21 22:49 Ill_Airport2204 Just got my Mirena removed after 6 years.
I got my Mirena inserted in 2018 (i was 19). It was the most painful experience. The whole time I had it in, I would think about one day getting it removed and would squirm just thinking about going through the pain again, but the removal was honestly pain free.
I had a great experience on the Mirena at first, besides gaining weight. I initially went on it because I always had very irregular, heavy and painful periods. The first 5 years were smooth, I didn’t get any acne, hair loss, mood swings or any side effects some women get. Occasionally I would spot very lightly near my cycle and have very minor cramps. However when year 6 started, I noticed myself getting constant cramps and all the side effects I never had. I was lightly bleeding every two months or so but it was more than spotting. My hair also started falling out like crazy and all of a sudden I have cystic hormonal acne. I got diagnosed with anxiety and depression and was always just tired and not feeling like myself. I noticed I was also gaining weight quicker and no matter how healthy I ate, or how much I worked out. I just can’t lose the weight. There were no major changes to my lifestyle that could have triggered this. (at least i don’t think so) But essentially after not having a regular period for so long, I decided to give my body a break from all the hormones and try to fix my gut and mental health. I’m just very scared to get the Mirena Crash but I’m looking forward to feeling like myself again.
I am on day 0 today but will update weekly my symptoms and any changes I see or feel after getting it removed.
I’m happy to answer any questions. :)
submitted by Ill_Airport2204 to gettingoffHBC [link] [comments]
I had a great experience on the Mirena at first, besides gaining weight. I initially went on it because I always had very irregular, heavy and painful periods. The first 5 years were smooth, I didn’t get any acne, hair loss, mood swings or any side effects some women get. Occasionally I would spot very lightly near my cycle and have very minor cramps. However when year 6 started, I noticed myself getting constant cramps and all the side effects I never had. I was lightly bleeding every two months or so but it was more than spotting. My hair also started falling out like crazy and all of a sudden I have cystic hormonal acne. I got diagnosed with anxiety and depression and was always just tired and not feeling like myself. I noticed I was also gaining weight quicker and no matter how healthy I ate, or how much I worked out. I just can’t lose the weight. There were no major changes to my lifestyle that could have triggered this. (at least i don’t think so) But essentially after not having a regular period for so long, I decided to give my body a break from all the hormones and try to fix my gut and mental health. I’m just very scared to get the Mirena Crash but I’m looking forward to feeling like myself again.
I am on day 0 today but will update weekly my symptoms and any changes I see or feel after getting it removed.
I’m happy to answer any questions. :)
2024.05.21 22:49 Ascension2TheDevine Saving yourself!
IT IS POSSIBLE! This is the first and most important fact to remind yourself consistently. There is no step by step plan for this. But there are things you need to know and study up on. Im going to go into some facts and get into what you can do to help yourself maneuver through life and out of the reality surrounding your life that is gangstalking….
*COVERT NARCISSISM- these aren’t your typical narcissistic people… they are harder to detect and utilize more dark manipulation tactics, like coercive control, manipulating you to try to play the wounded healer role, and playing the caring friend role, giving gifts (don’t except gifts! More on that later) “helping” you so they can act like you use them and take credit for good things that come in your life and your accomplishments. HOW TO DEAL WITH THE ISSUE? Research! YouTube, Ben Taylor’s channel called raw motivations, YouTube also has information about dark psychology manipulation tactics and I would really dig DEEP into that, recognize the tactics of dark psychology being utilized by the people you interact with in your day to day life and then proceed to cut them off! And when they try to act confused understand that it’s more manipulation. Covert narcissists LOVEEEE to use an internal podcasting system to play their group podcasts through your devices with multiple audio output so you can hear them talking shit while they watch you, this way they can call you crazy and make you look crazy to everyone. HOW DO YOU SOLVE THIS? block the people that you hear, on your accounts and cut them off completely, also raise your vibrational frequency and the voices will fade. They will send you texts that have t”ypos” that have a period in between two words instead of a space or just a period where it wouldn’t belong, it’s a hack link and you need to block them immediately and turn off your phone immediately after blocking them and cut them off and out of your life immediately, they are hacking you to know what your plans are so they can Sabotage you, along with watching you to later fuck with your head.
*UNDERSTAND THAT YOU ARE NOW IN SPIRITUAL WARFARE!!!!!! These people are in cults for the most part…. Look up the INEE handbook. These cults have different names because there’s more than one cult. Ouiinee is the one I dealt with personally. They use a language of context, which means they use code words for many things. “School” is what they call the humiliation ritual they do on a victim they have targeted, “teachers” are your handlers, they break you down to control you and try to teach you that conformity is your only option, “work” is their word for organized operations against you that they document record so they can make money off your suffering, by selling footage on dark web platforms. They will do black magic on you for energy harvesting and to create blockages…. Ever get a gift given to you and then you lose your job or something you love, or become more and more trapped? Pray to your Devine god, call your guardian angels ( YouTube “dark knight of the soul” and “spiritual warfare”) they also supercharge their technology with dark magic to make you hear their internal podcasting system down to the core of your soul, they will also attack you in your dreams, and you just have to get closer to the Devine. Don’t fear being alone, isolate yourself to research and reconstruct yourself to vibrate higher. What helped me know what they were doing was the tarot readers on YouTube. REMEMBER THAT THE DEMONIC SIDE DOES’T ATTACK SOMEONE THAT HAS NO LIGHT!!! IF YOU DON’T HAVE THE ENERGY THAT COMES FROM THE DEVINE LIGHT EMBEDDED IN THE FABRIC OF YOUR SOUL, YOU AREN’T A THREAT AND YOU CANNOT BE OF USE EITHER!! You must listen to your intuition and develop your discernment, your gut feeling will always tell you something is not right, and listening to it is more important than falling into the trap of not wanting to believe that someone you care about isn’t who they pretend to be, it’s a mask and they were never who you thought they were. It’s important to not be having sex with these people and it’s safer to stick with solo action until you are in the clear, this is one of the ways they attach energetic cords to you so they can harvest your energy and bind demonic entities to you and make their black magic more effective in keeping you vulnerable, stuck and stagnant in life
*THINGS WILL HAPPEN WITH NANOTECHNOLOGY. Strange fibers growing in your skin, seeing small dust particle drones, etc……. You need to move unannounced and mostly unplanned, tell no one, and move far enough away that it’s inconvenient for them travel to watch you, being trapped is an illusion. It may seem like they fallow you everywhere, also an illusion, they are simply just EVERYWHERE! This is where understanding dark psychology, setting firm boundaries,discernment, and intuition is important! Don’t disrespect your boundaries, when you do that they have the upper hand and will always take it farther, as soon as someone disrespects your boundaries, simply walk away and cut them off. Make room in your life for those that respect your boundaries. Not everyone is like that, also don’t over share your personal life, you don’t owe anyone an explanation for everything. They appear to be fallowing you to every town because you display behaviors that they can exploit. They can sniff out easy targets like a bloodhound. Have boundaries and tell people when they are disrespecting a boundary and if they don’t stop they you will cut them off, then fallow through.
*ADVANCED BIOFUELS- genetic engineering, feeling crawling under your skin, covered with a very oily/waxy substance, getting random cuts on your body like invisible razor blades are coming out of nowhere and doing driveby on your skin? Making you feel like you’re being attacked by parasites? That’s advanced biofuels and they have a code word for it called buty wax that refers to butamax you need to RELOCATE and this will eventually destroy your body and your immune system and they will keep putting it into your environment until you move. They can make it at home or get it from the dark web for cheap, this is a torture tactic and as long as they know your location you are not safe from this. To help treat the effects of this, do cleanses to eliminate toxins from your body and take natural herbal remedies that will boost your immune system, get sunlight and exercise, avoid drugs and alcohol.
*DONT USE HARD DRUGS they target people with addictions because people don’t want to believe that what is happening is true if you’re on drugs, people don’t take addicts seriously because they assume they they are just hallucinations, making them an easy target for this type of abuse. Also many people in the drug world target people so they can get more drugs as payment and use drugs without being the target. And numb their pain all at your expense.
*AVOID THE PEOPLE, PLACES, AND THINGS, avoid the people you know are your gang stalkers, avoid places like bars, strip clubs, and trap houses, and avoid things that trigger you to relapse on drugs or get involved with certain people, also avoid the people places and things that give you a bad gut feeling.
submitted by Ascension2TheDevine to GangstalkingTruth [link] [comments]
*COVERT NARCISSISM- these aren’t your typical narcissistic people… they are harder to detect and utilize more dark manipulation tactics, like coercive control, manipulating you to try to play the wounded healer role, and playing the caring friend role, giving gifts (don’t except gifts! More on that later) “helping” you so they can act like you use them and take credit for good things that come in your life and your accomplishments. HOW TO DEAL WITH THE ISSUE? Research! YouTube, Ben Taylor’s channel called raw motivations, YouTube also has information about dark psychology manipulation tactics and I would really dig DEEP into that, recognize the tactics of dark psychology being utilized by the people you interact with in your day to day life and then proceed to cut them off! And when they try to act confused understand that it’s more manipulation. Covert narcissists LOVEEEE to use an internal podcasting system to play their group podcasts through your devices with multiple audio output so you can hear them talking shit while they watch you, this way they can call you crazy and make you look crazy to everyone. HOW DO YOU SOLVE THIS? block the people that you hear, on your accounts and cut them off completely, also raise your vibrational frequency and the voices will fade. They will send you texts that have t”ypos” that have a period in between two words instead of a space or just a period where it wouldn’t belong, it’s a hack link and you need to block them immediately and turn off your phone immediately after blocking them and cut them off and out of your life immediately, they are hacking you to know what your plans are so they can Sabotage you, along with watching you to later fuck with your head.
*UNDERSTAND THAT YOU ARE NOW IN SPIRITUAL WARFARE!!!!!! These people are in cults for the most part…. Look up the INEE handbook. These cults have different names because there’s more than one cult. Ouiinee is the one I dealt with personally. They use a language of context, which means they use code words for many things. “School” is what they call the humiliation ritual they do on a victim they have targeted, “teachers” are your handlers, they break you down to control you and try to teach you that conformity is your only option, “work” is their word for organized operations against you that they document record so they can make money off your suffering, by selling footage on dark web platforms. They will do black magic on you for energy harvesting and to create blockages…. Ever get a gift given to you and then you lose your job or something you love, or become more and more trapped? Pray to your Devine god, call your guardian angels ( YouTube “dark knight of the soul” and “spiritual warfare”) they also supercharge their technology with dark magic to make you hear their internal podcasting system down to the core of your soul, they will also attack you in your dreams, and you just have to get closer to the Devine. Don’t fear being alone, isolate yourself to research and reconstruct yourself to vibrate higher. What helped me know what they were doing was the tarot readers on YouTube. REMEMBER THAT THE DEMONIC SIDE DOES’T ATTACK SOMEONE THAT HAS NO LIGHT!!! IF YOU DON’T HAVE THE ENERGY THAT COMES FROM THE DEVINE LIGHT EMBEDDED IN THE FABRIC OF YOUR SOUL, YOU AREN’T A THREAT AND YOU CANNOT BE OF USE EITHER!! You must listen to your intuition and develop your discernment, your gut feeling will always tell you something is not right, and listening to it is more important than falling into the trap of not wanting to believe that someone you care about isn’t who they pretend to be, it’s a mask and they were never who you thought they were. It’s important to not be having sex with these people and it’s safer to stick with solo action until you are in the clear, this is one of the ways they attach energetic cords to you so they can harvest your energy and bind demonic entities to you and make their black magic more effective in keeping you vulnerable, stuck and stagnant in life
*THINGS WILL HAPPEN WITH NANOTECHNOLOGY. Strange fibers growing in your skin, seeing small dust particle drones, etc……. You need to move unannounced and mostly unplanned, tell no one, and move far enough away that it’s inconvenient for them travel to watch you, being trapped is an illusion. It may seem like they fallow you everywhere, also an illusion, they are simply just EVERYWHERE! This is where understanding dark psychology, setting firm boundaries,discernment, and intuition is important! Don’t disrespect your boundaries, when you do that they have the upper hand and will always take it farther, as soon as someone disrespects your boundaries, simply walk away and cut them off. Make room in your life for those that respect your boundaries. Not everyone is like that, also don’t over share your personal life, you don’t owe anyone an explanation for everything. They appear to be fallowing you to every town because you display behaviors that they can exploit. They can sniff out easy targets like a bloodhound. Have boundaries and tell people when they are disrespecting a boundary and if they don’t stop they you will cut them off, then fallow through.
*ADVANCED BIOFUELS- genetic engineering, feeling crawling under your skin, covered with a very oily/waxy substance, getting random cuts on your body like invisible razor blades are coming out of nowhere and doing driveby on your skin? Making you feel like you’re being attacked by parasites? That’s advanced biofuels and they have a code word for it called buty wax that refers to butamax you need to RELOCATE and this will eventually destroy your body and your immune system and they will keep putting it into your environment until you move. They can make it at home or get it from the dark web for cheap, this is a torture tactic and as long as they know your location you are not safe from this. To help treat the effects of this, do cleanses to eliminate toxins from your body and take natural herbal remedies that will boost your immune system, get sunlight and exercise, avoid drugs and alcohol.
*DONT USE HARD DRUGS they target people with addictions because people don’t want to believe that what is happening is true if you’re on drugs, people don’t take addicts seriously because they assume they they are just hallucinations, making them an easy target for this type of abuse. Also many people in the drug world target people so they can get more drugs as payment and use drugs without being the target. And numb their pain all at your expense.
*AVOID THE PEOPLE, PLACES, AND THINGS, avoid the people you know are your gang stalkers, avoid places like bars, strip clubs, and trap houses, and avoid things that trigger you to relapse on drugs or get involved with certain people, also avoid the people places and things that give you a bad gut feeling.
- I am open to answering any questions to the best of my knowledge. I know these things from experience dealing with these assholes for years, I have a heightened extra sensory perception, which means that I have spiritual gifts that have made it easier to practice divination (communicating with the deceased and spirit guides) spot on intuition that got me out of some very fucked up situations at last minute, as well as just knowing exactly what to collect samples of in my environment to look at under a microscope, and I also research everything that I feel is suspicious. Also look up the court documents for MK-ULTRA and research everything you don’t understand. I got away and nobody came to my rescue, I had to save myself and this is a great start. It goes way deeper than this but it’s too much to type here. Just ask me in the comments and I might be able to help with whatever answer you’re looking for.
2024.05.21 22:48 tammytats22 Looking for advice, feeling stuck (long post)
Hi guys, this is my first post on here, sorry if it’s a long one. 24 year old here. I’m in the beginning stages of being officially diagnosed with endo and I’ve been a silent watcher on this thread and it has been a great resource for me so I wanted to share myself after a disappointment of an visit today.
Backstory, I first went to my OB last year in May 2023 for stabbing pelvic pain during my period and ovulation, bleeding between periods, and other symptoms I’m now noticing (GI issues, bladder pain/bowel movement pain, and severe fatigue), and shooting rectal pain. I actually switched to a male OB after being gaslit by a female OB. I saw him in May for an ultrasound and exam, and the ultrasound was normal which I figured. Upon exam he said he could feel lesions (I think he called it uterosacral nodules?) in my cul de sac and he was pretty sure I have endometriosis but didn’t want to do unnecessary surgery on me and cause me more pain.
He (of course) recommended birth control to slow the growth of endo and “preserve my future fertility” since I don’t have any kids yet. I started them for 2 weeks but then stopped since I started getting awful mood side effects. I had bad side effects from OCPs in college and am still trying to heal my body from it.
I’ve also been having some spotting lately so he did another scan (which showed nothing) and offered either to do nothing, start OCPs, or do a saline ultrasound to see if anything was missed on my last scan. I chose the saline ultrasound. I just had the SIS done today (which hurt, bad) which I know won’t show endo, but just to rule other things out. Results were normal. He again suggested northeindrone(?) birth control and I kindly declined. It has ended here.
I guess what I want your guys thoughts on is where do I go from here? I feel stuck. I do not feel like my endo is very severe, I feel it is likely stage I, maybe stage II. But I just don’t know if I just give it a rest from now on until it gets worse and I need more intervention? I’m afraid of taking birth control but I also don’t want unnecessary surgery that might make my pain worse (and it doesn’t sound like he would want to perform it since he just said it’ll grow back). Do I just leave it alone for now and cope with the symptoms? They are manageable still.
Thoughts?
submitted by tammytats22 to Endo [link] [comments]
Backstory, I first went to my OB last year in May 2023 for stabbing pelvic pain during my period and ovulation, bleeding between periods, and other symptoms I’m now noticing (GI issues, bladder pain/bowel movement pain, and severe fatigue), and shooting rectal pain. I actually switched to a male OB after being gaslit by a female OB. I saw him in May for an ultrasound and exam, and the ultrasound was normal which I figured. Upon exam he said he could feel lesions (I think he called it uterosacral nodules?) in my cul de sac and he was pretty sure I have endometriosis but didn’t want to do unnecessary surgery on me and cause me more pain.
He (of course) recommended birth control to slow the growth of endo and “preserve my future fertility” since I don’t have any kids yet. I started them for 2 weeks but then stopped since I started getting awful mood side effects. I had bad side effects from OCPs in college and am still trying to heal my body from it.
I’ve also been having some spotting lately so he did another scan (which showed nothing) and offered either to do nothing, start OCPs, or do a saline ultrasound to see if anything was missed on my last scan. I chose the saline ultrasound. I just had the SIS done today (which hurt, bad) which I know won’t show endo, but just to rule other things out. Results were normal. He again suggested northeindrone(?) birth control and I kindly declined. It has ended here.
I guess what I want your guys thoughts on is where do I go from here? I feel stuck. I do not feel like my endo is very severe, I feel it is likely stage I, maybe stage II. But I just don’t know if I just give it a rest from now on until it gets worse and I need more intervention? I’m afraid of taking birth control but I also don’t want unnecessary surgery that might make my pain worse (and it doesn’t sound like he would want to perform it since he just said it’ll grow back). Do I just leave it alone for now and cope with the symptoms? They are manageable still.
Thoughts?
2024.05.21 22:47 LightsongSays Biggest Problems in Estate Planning?
Hey everyone, I’m building online tooling to help simplify estate planning for estate attorneys and their clients.
I’ve been having trouble validating the problem space and ensure we’re going in the right direction because of how challenging it is to get in touch with estate attorneys.
As attorneys, you face unique challenges and scenarios in your daily practice. Could you share what aspects of estate planning you find most cumbersome or time-consuming? What features do you wish existed that could assist both you and your clients?
The tool is still in the early stages, so your insights could significantly shape its development. I’m especially interested in understanding:
Thank you for your time and expertise. Looking forward to your valuable input. It will help a lot!
submitted by LightsongSays to EstatePlanning [link] [comments]
I’ve been having trouble validating the problem space and ensure we’re going in the right direction because of how challenging it is to get in touch with estate attorneys.
As attorneys, you face unique challenges and scenarios in your daily practice. Could you share what aspects of estate planning you find most cumbersome or time-consuming? What features do you wish existed that could assist both you and your clients?
The tool is still in the early stages, so your insights could significantly shape its development. I’m especially interested in understanding:
- The most common issues you encounter with current estate planning software.
- Desired features that would simplify your workflow or improve client interactions.
- Any other feedback or suggestions that could make our tool more effective and user-friendly.
Thank you for your time and expertise. Looking forward to your valuable input. It will help a lot!
2024.05.21 22:46 Diversity_News_Mag Introducing PressReleaseEvents.com: Your Ultimate Destination for Effective Press Release Distribution!
 | https://preview.redd.it/qsylim0odu1d1.jpg?width=724&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a4a605aca57f22ae86f3b2e8bf8986fe6719f434 submitted by Diversity_News_Mag to PressReleaseEvents [link] [comments] 🎉 Exciting Announcement! 🎉 🌟 Introducing PressReleaseEvents.com - Your Ultimate Platform for Press Release Distribution! 🌟 📣 Attention to all businesses, organizations, and individuals looking to make a big splash with their news! We are thrilled to unveil our latest venture, PressReleaseEvents.com! 🚀 PressReleaseEvents.com is here to revolutionize the way you share your news and announcements with the world. Whether you're launching a new product, hosting an event, or simply have exciting updates to share, our platform is your one-stop destination for effective press release distribution. Here's why PressReleaseEvents.com is your go-to solution: 📝 **Easy Submission Process:** Submitting your press release is a breeze with our user-friendly interface. Simply fill out the necessary details, upload your release, and you're all set! 🎯 **Targeted Distribution:** Reach the right audience with our targeted distribution options. Whether you're targeting specific industries, regions, or demographics, we've got you covered. 📈 **Maximized Visibility:** Amplify your reach and visibility with our extensive network of media contacts, journalists, bloggers, and influencers. Get your news in front of the right people and watch your story spread far and wide. 🔍 **Detailed Analytics:** Track the performance of your press release with our comprehensive analytics dashboard. Monitor views, engagement, and other key metrics to gauge the impact of your announcement. 🤝 **Affordable Pricing:** We believe in providing high-quality services at prices that won't break the bank. With flexible pricing plans to suit every budget, you can enjoy maximum exposure without overspending. 🌐 **Global Reach:** Whether you're targeting local markets or aiming for international exposure, PressReleaseEvents.com offers global reach to help you connect with audiences around the world. Don't let your news go unnoticed. Join the thousands of businesses and organizations already benefiting from PressReleaseEvents.com and start sharing your story today! Visit [PressReleaseEvents.com](http://www.pressreleaseevents.com) to learn more and get started. Get ready to make headlines with PressReleaseEvents.com! 📰✨ PressRelease #PRDistribution #Announcement #MediaCoverage #PressReleaseEvents |
2024.05.21 22:44 MetalMaiden13666 I was in a perfect loving relationship with the man of my dreams;then,one day,out of the blue,he started to treat me awful
Well..untill months ago,I really had it all.I met my beloved one back in 2020,I fell in love deeply,probably the very first time I ever loved someone completely,trully,without expectations,without any interest beside his pure nature,personality,intimacy,compatibilty,trust,etc..And he showed in actions more than words that we were feeling exactly the same way about each other.He had to leave due his military life,I thought I wouldnt survive,so much pain,from being apart. He promised find a way to come back,But wasnt a sure thing,so we couldnt be a relationship,cause we didnt know if we could ever meet again.Meanwhile,he was having other ppl out there,and I also tried my best to move on.I couldnt obviously.Then one year and half later,he did came back,and was the most absolutely wonderful thing that ever happened ,he brought me back to life.We decided never be apart again,and commited completely to each other.Was a perfect year for us,I felt loved,he also said that we had it perfect,making plans day and night,fully comminted to each other.Then,when I planned and paid a wonderful summer vacation on a amazing beach hotel,he started to treat me like shit,complaining about everything,etc,which was shocking ,he was the sweetest,and most humble guy ever,all about simple things,and no matter how tired,bad weather,drunk he was,he was wonderful to me.Accusing me of talking to other ppl,critising everything,paranoid,grabing my phone etc.Till I saw by accident while he was scrolling angry,pic with a ugly" woman" (i thought it was a man at first,)he claimed he never had anything with her,and just forgot to delete it.Clearly lie,i saw he posted pic with her before when we werent together,which was painful,cause he never even posted anything about me.Anywayss..I went nuts ofc,all the bad treatment,accusations,while I was paying for a great time and doing all I could to cheer him up,and put up with that bad mood.He got a lil better in the following months,but never got back to normal;till a month ago,he snaped.Serioulsy,he doesnt even look or sound like the same person,constantly criticizing everything I do,(all I do is try to make him happy,reassure him,validating him,and not do the things he dont like),I literally stopped a huge list of things that are my passion,I changed my work for a low payer one ,that I cant barely pay my bills,cause he was too jealous and said that my job was the only thing he hates.I dont even like myself now.I was happy,funny,loved life,dancing,spontaneous,smart,talkative,super smiling..Recently all I do is crying.He called me all kinds of stuff,that I still cant believe it.He hide his phone at all costs,and the only time I asked to see ,he snaped even harder,like never before,I lost my mind completely,and had a few nervous and mental breakdowns, the last time was the worst,I destroyed my apt while kicking him out,cause I saw messages,, when I asked to check ,he deleted the recent conversations with exes that he claims was before was.So;all the accusasions,poor treatment,broke promises,lies,etc,he still playing the victm.But keep saying he loves me.I love him.I cant believe I am putting up to all this,I am just confused. He changed,I really cannot recognize him,and it wasnt scalating,was really from one day to another.I dont know wt to do.
submitted by MetalMaiden13666 to relatioships [link] [comments]
2024.05.21 22:40 Magic-Vagina Does anyone take their Wellbutrin at night?
I’ve been on Wellbutrin XL 150mg for about 4 weeks now, I take it in the morning ~5:30am. Been on Lexapro 10mg for about 6 months, and I take it at night ~8pm along with some supplements.
I forgot to to take my Wellbutrin this morning and I plan to just take one tonight and possibly just continue taking it at night.
I’ve heard it can keep you up but these past few weeks I don’t really feel any effects from the pill when I take it in the morning that make me feel like it would keep me up at night.
Anyone else take it at night? Or Is this a terrible idea?
submitted by Magic-Vagina to Wellbutrin_Bupropion [link] [comments]
I forgot to to take my Wellbutrin this morning and I plan to just take one tonight and possibly just continue taking it at night.
I’ve heard it can keep you up but these past few weeks I don’t really feel any effects from the pill when I take it in the morning that make me feel like it would keep me up at night.
Anyone else take it at night? Or Is this a terrible idea?
2024.05.21 22:40 Still_Performance_39 An Introduction to Terran Zoology - Chapter 37
Credit to u/SpacePaladin15 for the NOP Universe.
Hey, I hope everyone's doing well!
Today we return to the namesake of this fic, an actual lesson about animals. This one focuses on Koalas! One of Australia's most recognisable critters. I hope you enjoy.
It's hardly worth mentioning, seeing as I'm an infrequent poster at the best of times, but I'll not have another chapter out for a few weeks due to limited free time and devoting most of my writing time to an upcoming ficnapping. Be sure to look out for that!
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Memory transcription subject: Rysel, Venlil Environmental Researcher
Date [Standardised human time]: 8th September 2136
“Koalas!”
Bernard’s energised voice boomed through the air as the classroom's monitor flickered into life, images of this paws lecture topic popping up one after the other until the entire screen was filled with a collage of furry quadrupeds.
Squee! I’ll never get tired of this, it’s all so cool!
As usual the sight of something new stirred immediate discussion, hushed murmurs swelling into vibrant discourse in little more than a heartbeat. Most of the class swiftly huddled together into small herds to bounce ideas around while the rest opted to stick to the solace of their own thoughts as they took in the display.
I’d be quite happy in either situation, though seeing as Sandi had already sunk into deep concentration and Kailo had peeled off to talk with Ennerif and Solenk, it seemed the decision had been made for me on this occasion. Wasting no more time on idle inspection of the people around me, I focused my full attention forward, eager to form first impressions before the lesson began in earnest.
Now then, time to make some educated guesses. What traits does this animal have? I wonder if I’ll get any right this paw?
Professional assumptions went paw-in-paw with the lectures, examining and coming up with hypotheses about the specimens was only natural. Recently however, I’d started to make a little game of it to make things even more interesting than usual. A veritable bonfire of ideas had been set ablaze within me, fueled by my newfound knowledge of Earthen wildlife. Every flash and spark of the flame was a fresh theory I could try to apply to the lectures. It was an invigorating exercise that further stoked my unceasing wonderment.
So far I’d only done this once during the previous class and, to my disappointment, I’d not done too well.
I was right when I guessed that chickens were omnivores, but wrong in my assumption that they could fly. And that red thing on their head, the um… what was it called? The comb! Yes, the comb. I thought that was to attract mates, but it regulates body heat instead. It’s fascinating. Oh! Stars damn it I’m rambling!
I bapped my tail against my leg, the soft thud being just enough to snap me back from my runaway thoughts before I went completely wall-eyed. I was becoming more and more accustomed to getting lost in my own head while remaining conscious of the fact; it was happening so frequently now that it was pretty much impossible not to. Now I was able to pull myself back to the world around me without having to rely on someone else shaking me out of it. Most of the time anyway.
Sandi still keeps an eye on me, and Kailo even decided to help out once without being too snide about it. Anyway where was I? Oh yeah, Koalas.
Glancing at the furred animals, two things immediately stood out. Firstly, their eyes were in a more central position on their face. And second, all the images showed them being on or close to trees. There were other noteworthy observations of course, such as the Koala’s prominent nose and rounded features, but they fell to the wayside as I honed in on these points first.
Hmmm… ok. I already know to discount the idea that they’re predators just from eye position, so let’s get that thought out of here. Maybe omnivorous? Herbivore? Agh no, I can’t just guess that for the sake of guessing, that’s the same problem! Hrm, it’s tough making these assumptions now that everything I thought I knew has been turned on its head.
Nevermind, I’ll focus on the other thing. All the trees make me think they’re arboreal, that seems to be a reasonable assumption. I wonder what else they-
Clearing his throat, Bernard broke my concentration, his call for attention silencing the murmuring conversation and redirecting everyone's focus to the lecturer's podium.
His gaze panned across the room as he waited for everyone to settle, a beaming smile lighting up his face, “As ever I’m delighted to see you all get so into the subject matter from the get go. I’m looking forward to hearing what you were discussing should you wish to share. For now though, how about we get started, hm?”
A chorus of merry bleats rang out from across the audience, ears and tails flicking happily in agreement. Bernard's grin grew in tandem with the class's fervour, clasping his hands together enthusiastically as he launched into the lesson, “Excellent! Then let’s get started.”
The pictures on screen dissolved away until only one remained, enlarging to cover the entire monitor with the fluffy grey face of a Koala peacefully reclining in the crook of a tree.
“Ah, there we are,” Bernard’s baritone timbre drifted through the room as he looked up at the image, his own tone reflecting the relaxed attitude of the animal on screen, “He looks so comfortable doesn’t he? Perfectly at peace with the world, not too surprising considering they sleep almost 20 hours a day. A full paw!”
A wave of beeps and gasps rippled through the herd, punctuated by a single yawn-dressed comment from Rova, “A full paw? Hwuuu… jealous.”
Her drowsy remark elicited several whistling giggles from the herd, Bernard's own jovial chortle joining them as he turned to face her, “Late evening Rova?”
I twisted a little in my seat, panning an eye in Rova’s direction just in time to see her bleary eyes bulge open and her ears shoot up, now intensely aware of the fact she hadn’t been as quiet as she thought she had.
Sitting up abruptly, she hastily tapped down errant tufts of wool that’d flared in surprise as she composed herself, though her nervousness at becoming the centre of the class's attention was still plain for all to hear, “Uh- I um… achem, a little bit yes, um- …sorry. Lokki dragged me out to a movie viewing in the rec centre. It went on pretty late.”
A melodramatic bray from the other side of the room drew everyone's ears away from Rova to the now aghast Lokki, paw splayed across his chest in faux indignation, “Dragged you? Well excuse me for trying to broaden your horizons with human movies. That’ll be the list time I- …Ahaaaa…”
Lokki’s theatrics were cut short by a heavy yawn of his own, a swell of whistling laughter rolling through the herd as vibrant bloom lit up his snout, a sight that elicited a particularly amused bleat from Rova.
Turning away from the duo I looked back at Bernard, pleased to see that he was chuckling along with us. Behaviour like Lokki’s would never have been tolerated in my school and university days but, in stark contrast, Bernard revelled in it, the liveliness of his students fueling his own bombastic style of teaching. It was a pleasant change of pace having a teacher who let us all be ourselves in class; provided we weren’t too disruptive to the lesson plan.
Speaking of which.
His laughter still rumbling through the air, Bernard clapped his hands to pull everyone's focus back to him, “Ok, ok, let’s get back to it then shall we? Rova. Lokki. Hopefully the two of you can stay awake long enough until you can grab yourselves a coffee.”
As the class settled down and the last few giggling beeps petered out, Benard pointed a hand to the screen, “So, the Koala. Let’s start simple shall we? They are herbivorous marsupials native to the eastern and southern coasts of Australia. Easily recognised the world over, they are a well known and beloved symbol of their homeland, along with other animals such as the Kangaroo and the Emu. The former of which you might remember from one of our earlier lectures.”
Indeed I did remember, along with how angry Bernard had gotten after some speh-head had derided the Yotul after he explained how he held specific disdain for such attitudes.
Uuuggghh… I never want to see him angry again. So chilling.
I shook my ears in an effort to dismiss the unpleasant memory, panning my eyes back to the monitor to try and distract myself by inspecting the Koala’s physical appearance once more. Thankfully, by some Star's blessed intervention, Bernard had the exact same idea.
“Koala’s are rather squat in stature, ranging around sixty to eighty-five centimetres in length and weighing little more than fifteen to sixteen kilograms at their full size. As you can see, the fur of this fellow before you is a lovely silvery grey, but their fur can also sport a chocolaty brown hue as well. Arguably the most distinctive part of their appearance is their head, being rather large for their body size and having rounded ears, a large nose, and a pair of small eyes. These are often brown but variations do occur.”
It didn’t slip past my notice that Bernard didn’t bother to point out that the Koala’s eyes were forward facing. I didn’t think he’d simply forgotten, so perhaps he just felt it wasn’t necessary given that he’d already stated it was herbivorous. Either way, no one stuck up a paw or tail to question him.
“Now this will hardly be surprising considering how long they sleep, but Koala’s are largely sedentary and it’s rather easy to see why when you have a look into the contents of their diet.”
With the press of a button the Koala on screen was replaced by images of vibrant green vegetation. Soaring trees and flowering shrubbery weaved together across landscape framed pictures pulled admiring trills from the herd, the diversity of the plant life being shown standing as a reminder that it wasn’t only animal life that flourished on Earth.
After giving everyone the chance to take in the picturesque scenes, Bernard casually hammered that point home, “This is eucalyptus or, more accurately, a choice selection of more than 700 plants belonging to the eucalyptus genus, though the Koala itself favours 30 of them in particular.”
700!? Stars…
Realising that my ears had drooped in my momentary awe, I twisted them back to tune into the lesson, only for them to splay out in shock at the next words to come out of Bernard's mouth.
“The leaves of these plants are the primary food source of the Koala and there are a couple things worth mentioning when talking about these plants. For starters they do not have much nutritional or caloric value, leading to the Koala’s low-energy lifestyle. Additionally, they contain toxic compounds.”
A shiver instantly ran through the herd, ears flicking rapidly in confusion and alarm followed by a few quizzical whispers. It didn’t take long for someone to decide to give a proper voice to the murmuring.
“Excuse me Doctor. Did we hear that right? Their diet is made up of toxic flora?” Vlek’s grumbling incredulity cut through the herd's mutterings with ease. Until Kailo’s recent change of heart, the fifty something rotation old blonde Venlil had been a close second in terms of scepticism. Mercifully his rebuttals had always been relevant questions as opposed to ranting diatribes, so he at least remained on topic if nothing else.
Bernard nodded in confirmation, smiling back at Vlek while absentmindedly twirling the end of his moustache, “You heard me right, they do indeed consume plants that are toxic. Just not to them.”
Any worry or uncertainty still clinging to the herd was swept away by the provision of the glaringly obvious answer, leaving me chuckling inwardly at the oversight.
Ah of course! The plant might be poisonous but they’ll have evolved to deal with that. Stars… I’m so used to expecting the unexpected with Earth that I didn’t even consider the simplest solution.
“I see, thank you Doctor,” Vlek replied, a tinge of interest still audible in his tone, “I assume they’ve developed some adaptation to become immune to the harmful effects?”
The question immediately evoked a smirk from our teacher, but he hurriedly suppressed it while bobbing his head, “They have indeed. There are several factors that aid in their digestion of eucalyptus leaves without succumbing to the plant's baleful properties. The first is a part of the intestinal tract called the cecum. It contains a microbiome that allows the Koala to digest the eucalyptus. Coupled with this is an enzyme in the Koala’s liver that helps them break down the toxins. They are also capable of sniffing out the plants with the least amount of toxins, ensuring that they ingest as little as possible.”
Pausing for a breath Bernard looked back at the screen before turning to face us, another grin curling at the edges of his mouth as he continued with his explanation, “This is mostly for adult Koala’s, because while their young also possess these same adaptations, they don’t just go straight to munching through foliage right after being born. No, they need a little help making that jump and getting a stomach full of all that good gut bacteria. It’s nothing bad, but those of a sensitive stomach may wish to prepare themselves for this next part.”
Bernard’s assurances did little to assuage the concern that his warning had foisted upon us. Having been exposed to so much of the weirdness Earth had to offer everyone always ended up on edge whenever Bernard gave advice like this, even if he did say it in jest.
What strange nonsense thing do Koala pups do then? Judging by the way he’s acting it probably isn’t something as simple as drinking milk from the mother. Hmmm…
“So,” Bernard began, snapping us from our pensive stupor, “Young Koala’s, known as joeys, have a gestation period of thirty-five days on average, which is approximately forty-two paws. Once born they travel from the birth canal to a pouch in their mother so that they can continue to develop and grow. In the pouch the joey finds and latches onto one of two teats and these provide the newborn with a steady stream of nourishing milk. It spends the next six to seven months growing in the pouch, its eyes, ears, and fur all developing as time goes on.”
Okay, interesting. But this is exactly how I thought it’d go. What’s different?
The unexpected normalcy of the Koala’s birth and growth cycle had calmed everyone's nerves, only to be replaced with an air of suspicion as we waited with rapt attention for Bernard to drop the other claw and upend our expectations like he always did.
Not wanting to keep us in further suspense he forged ahead, the tempo of his voice picking up as the smile started to crease his face once more, “Now to make the switch from milk to eucalyptus, the mother also feeds the joey a substance called pap. It comes from the cecum I mentioned earlier, and contains all the gut bacteria required to help the young Koala in making the switch to eucalyptus.”
He stopped and looked around, searching us for a reaction to what I felt was a rather bland statement of fact. What was it he was saying without actually saying? Koala pups drink milk to mature and then include this pap substance so that they can start eating plants. I don’t see what-
The cecum is part of the intestine.
I blinked.
I blinked again, the intrusive interruption scouring my brain clean of any other thought bar the one it’d just implanted itself in the forefront of my mind.
Oh stars. They-
“They eat their own poop!?”
The shocked bleat shattered the peace of the room to reveal that most if not all of us had come to the same tail curling conclusion. As the hall filled with unrestrained vocalisations of disgust, an ‘Ugh’ over here and a ‘Blegh’ over there, Bernard’s own bellowing laughter joined the throng of voices.
“Ha! Everytime! Each and every time. Clearly it doesn’t matter if my students are Human or Venlil. Whenever someone learns about the Koala’s dietary development the reaction is the same!”
Pleased with himself beyond reason, Bernard chuckled away while the rest of us grappled with this ghastly reality. While there were plenty of animals that feasted on things that ranged from simply unappealing all the way to the stomach churningly grotesque, I’d never heard of an animal that actively consumed the excrement of its own species. Benefits aside, the prospect of having to do that to survive to adulthood sent a shiver of revulsion down my spine.
Ewww… Stars, I hope I forget this feeling by 2nd meal. They’re serving sturen and magamroot stew later. I was really looking forward to it.
With the herds mood beginning to temper Bernard tapped the podiums controls, removing the verdant collage of eucalyptus to display several similar yet distinct environments, still chortling merrily to himself in the process, “Ok then, with that little foray into their diet complete, why don’t we look at their habitat in more detail? As you might imagine given their diet and arboreal nature, Koala’s live in forested regions, and can be found in tropical and temperate zones. About a century ago they were classed as a vulnerable species, however efforts were made to turn this around and increase their numbers. Sadly the largest factor in their decline was human activity, as the fertile lands that gave rise to their bountiful forests were coveted farm land for our settlements.”
It was strange to hear Bernard so matter of factly admit to humanity's negative impacts on other species. He’d alluded to such things in the past but always with an air of caution, carefully pawing the line between honestly answering a question while not painting humanity as uncaring and destructive. AKA, the ‘predators’ we’d all initially expected them to be.
Perhaps his comfort in making such admissions was a reflection of the class's comfort with him, for no one so much as batted an ear. Even Kailo, who I would’ve expected to jump at the chance to use this as a prime example of predatory danger, only flicked an ear in stern yet silent concern.
A cough from Bernard drew my attention back, a new picture on screen that showed a forest from a bird's-eye view. Drawn across the image were around a dozen ringed areas, some bordering one another while others overlapped to some degree. It took me a moment, but I soon recognised that what I was looking at was a map, the rings representing what I assumed to be territories. And it didn’t take much effort to guess who each one belonged to.
“From habitats we move onto behaviours, so let’s start with territories. Koala’s are solitary animals. Yes, despite being herbivores. Considering they’re only awake for roughly four hours of the day I can hardly blame them. Lots to do and not a lot of time to do it. Jokes aside, once they mature they are quite independent, carving out a little slice of land for themselves, as displayed in this example, called a Home Range. That is not to say they go it alone and leave everything else behind however. Rather, as shown in the map behind me, they live in their own space while still being part of a larger social group.”
With another press of his pad the picture was updated to show one of two symbols in each segment, along with a key to the side of the map displayed in helpful Venlang. A quick glance told me that the symbols were representing whether the territory belonged to a male or female of the species.
“As you can see there is quite a bit of overlap between different Koala’s territories. It is in these areas that most of the socialising takes place between neighbours. The trees in these locations represent the few areas where intrusion across territories is acceptable for the sake of social interaction. Outside of that the Koala’s stick to their own territories for the most part, with the exceptions of Koala’s who are passing through, attempting to become part of the social group themselves, or dominant males who sometimes go off into another Koala’s range. But how do they know where one range begins and another range ends you might ask? Well, this brings us onto the next part of the lecture. How do Koala’s communicate?”
Wiping away the map from the monitor, Bernard loaded up a video of a Koala sitting in a tree and pressed play. Head held high, the Koala’s body shook as it belted out a reverberating call into the wilderness that could only be described as a garbled combination of a car engine failing to turn over mixed with the hiccups of someone with a particularly sore throat.
That’s how they sound? Oof that must be rough on the lungs.
I clearly wasn’t the only one to share such a thought, because I clocked Sandi tracing a paw along her neck as the noise went on, ears fluttering in discomfort at the noise.
Bernard himself cleared his own throat as the video came to an end, minimising it and replacing it with another image of a tree with a Koala rubbing up against the bark, “I think they’ve got me beat on who’s got the deeper voice!”
His joke garnered several amused beeps, a rare reaction that caused a beaming smile to shine across his face at lighting speed, “Oh you’re too kind. I’ll be here all week. Now where were we? Oh yes! Communication. As you’ve just heard, Koala’s are capable of loud low pitched bellows that can carry over vast distances. These express everything from ‘Hello I’m over here’ to ‘This is my turf, stay away’. Bellowing is more common in the males than the females, opting for shouting matches as opposed to outright fights when it comes to asserting dominance. Other vocal expressions include grunts, wails, and snarls if they’re acting particularly angsty. Mother and joey pairs also communicate through gentle clicking, squeaking, and murmuring sounds. And there’s one more thing worth mentioning. Something they have in common with Humans and Venlil when it comes to emoting.”
Really? They do something we do?
Curious, I pressed myself against the desk, straining as close as I could to once more scrutinise the Koala’s features. Not a lot stood out to me at first, the grey marsupial not sharing many similarities with a Venlil that I could identify.
Ok think. We show emotion with our ears, tails, and our wool on occasion. They don’t have tails so it’s obviously not that. Wool standing on end is more a reaction than a conscious expression. So it must be the ears then.
To my quiet satisfaction, my hunch was soon validated by Bernard, “As well as their vocalisations, Koala’s are very emotive through their facial features. Just like humans, they use their mouths and lips to show how they feel, but these tend more towards the aggressive side of the scale than what you might see on a human. Regarding yourselves however, Koala’s utilise their ears in tandem with their mouth movements when showing strong emotion.”
I was delighted to hear that my assumption was correct, a little happy flick twisting out through my tail and bapping against my chair with a muted thump against the plastic.
Hehe yes! Got one right!
“Now then, we are getting close to lunchtime so I’ll finish this segment off with something I think you’ll find particularly interesting. Diplomacy.”
Perplexed mutterings followed in the wake of the bizarre inclusion to the lecture, my own thoughts being dominated by bewilderment as I tried and failed to make sense of how the two could possibly be related.
Why would Koala’s, or any animal for that matter, be linked to diplomacy? Hmmm...
I could understand dispatching exterminators to deal with a predator issue as a show of goodwill, that at least includes animals, but Humans aren’t like that so I think I can safely scratch that off the list.
Maybe the humans who live in that region benefited from Koala’s in some way. Could they have gotten something from them? But what?
Hopefully not what the pups get from their mothers.
Agh no! Begone awful intrusive thoughts. Blegh! I don’t need that in my head.
As I wrestled with the short-lived revulsion inflicted upon me by my Star's damned subconscious, Bernard placed a new image on screen, one that was decidedly different from all that had preceded it.
On screen were more than a couple dozen pictures of humans. Some were pictured alone while others congregated in large groups while cameras surrounded them from all angles. Across all the images, I noted two common themes. First of all, a solid majority of the humans were wearing formal wear similar to what I’d seen worn by UN representatives on TV. If the gaggle of journalists in the background of the photos didn’t already confirm my suspicions, then it was this similarity which made me conclude they were all people of some importance. Likely politicians judging from context clues.
Secondly, each of the individuals was interacting with a Koala in some form. Some cradled one against their chests while others were feeding it eucalyptus leaves or pellets of some kind. One of the assumed politicians had become an impromptu bed for a snoozing bundle of fur, a gleeful smile spread across their face as they lovingly gazed down at the sleeping Koala in their lap.
As I continued to stare at the assorted photos something clicked into place, a sudden spark flickering into life. A burgeoning light of comprehension that flared and swelled with every wide-eyed breath I took. Some things still escaped me, things I hoped would soon be explained, but in staring at all of the humans happy smiling faces, I was struck with an instant of pure understanding.
If someone, say a Nevok for instance, offered to gift me a creature that was common to them but which might exotic and breathtaking to a Venlil, how could my feelings not be swayed? How could I walk away from that encounter and not have grown closer to them as a result?
“Koala diplomacy,” Bernard waved his hand up at the monitor, a slight reverence in his tone, “My favourite kind of soft power diplomacy. Where political leaders take photo ops with Koala’s and, on occasion, the Australian government loans Koala’s to other nations for a time to bolster positive relations. It certainly helps that Koala’s are a beloved animal worldwide, drawing large crowds and revenue for countries fortunate enough to host the adorable critters.”
The truly alien concept predictably sparked instant discussion in the herd, two polar opposite schools of thought swiftly cementing themselves as the most popular opinions. Simultaneously, I heard one voice trill excitedly while another scoffed at what they clearly saw as a ridiculous and offensive notion.
“Squee! That’d be so cool! I’d love to get the chance to see a Liri from Coila. Remember the Rainbow Boa? Think of that shimmering effect and colour but put it on a bird! Ah! I’ve only heard their song on video. It’d be a treat to hear it in person!”
Ooo! I’ve read about them! I’d love to get up close to one.
“Loaning. As if animals are property to be hoarded and traded? Pugh! Another predatory trait the humans don’t want to acknowledge for what it is.”
Ugh, typical. Jump right to the worst possible option.
However, despite my dismissal of their disparaging fumings, an uncomfortable thought pressed upon my mind. While it was plain to see how much humans cared for the Koala, it didn’t change the fact that humans did keep animals as property just as the scornful herd member had said.
This begged a rather important, disquieting question. Aside from keeping some animals as cattle, a stomach tightening minefield I had no desire to step a claw onto right now, how else did humans keep other creatures. And how did they treat them?
Before I was fully conscious of doing it my paw was in the air, the question primed on my tongue.
Noticing my elevated paw Bernard pointed at me, smiling warmly, “Yes Rysel? What’s on your mind?”
Sorry Bernard. I hope this one’s not too awkward for you to answer.
Flicking my ear in appreciation, and waiting for everyone to settle enough so that I could be heard, I voiced my concerns as neutrally as possible, “Thank you Doctor. I uh, just had a thought. We know that humans keep certain animals for… particular reasons, and we know why. From how you’ve spoken about Koala’s I think it's fair to say that the same cannot be said for them. However, this makes me wonder, what other reasons do humans have for keeping animals and how do you treat them?”
A flash of surprise blinked across Bernard's eyes but vanished so quickly that it felt like I’d imagined it. Had he not expected such a question? Maybe he was just shocked that it’d been me who’d ended up asking it?
Stars, am I so predictable that no one expects me to ask difficult questions?
Unfortunately, a quick glance at my deskmates seemed to prove that to be the case, as both Sandi and Kailo were looking at me with differing degrees of astonishment flapping in their ears.
Well speh.
“A very good point Rysel, certainly one that’s worth raising. Yet another example of you all anticipating what I have to say before I can bring it up myself.” Bernard tapped the podium, switching off the monitor before returning his focus to me, “We won’t be needing that. I’ve nothing prepared that I can show you and we’re heading to lunch in a few minutes anyway. Still, that’s plenty of time to give you a bit of an answer.”
A bit? What does he mean just a bit?
Made even more curious by Bernard's preempted admission that he wasn’t going to fully answer my query, I dialled both my ears on him, fixing him with an inquisitive stare as he started to explain with a tone that was noticeably more nonchalant than any of his previous explanations.
“So, animals in captivity for reasons other than what you already know. Honestly I would love to delve into other reasons regarding why we keep animals. However, I have a lesson plan in the works that I hope to share with you all in the not too distant future. Some of it touches upon this very topic and I’d quite like to bundle it all together. That said, I can tell you how animals in captivity are treated. In short, the answer is very well. There are a mountain of laws both on private and public interests that govern the standards and ethical treatment of animals, and breaches of these laws are quite severe even for relatively minor infractions.”
While I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t disappointed by the vague answer to what was really the bulk of my question, I was at least satisfied by Bernard’s assurances that animals in captivity, such as the Koala, were well looked after. Considering the barely subdued grumbling coming from some corners of the audience it was clear that several of the herd didn’t believe Bernard outright, but I trusted him to be honest. Additionally, the mention of an upcoming lecture focused on humans keeping animals caused quite the buzz.
I felt a mix of excitement and trepidation at exploring the topic further. He’d pretty much confirmed we wouldn’t be talking about cattle farms, for which I was relieved, but that still left a huge amount of uncertainty in what was to come.
Humans keeping animals as cattle was a forgone conclusion. As horrifying as that reality was, it was one I could understand from a detached and strictly clinical point of view. Being predators they ate meat and therefore they kept cattle. But the concept of keeping animals for any other reason baffled me.
What could be the purpose? The diplomacy thing makes sense now that I have context, but what other reasons could they have.
The class's discussions were interrupted by the recognisable ring of the break bell, the shift in attention eliciting a change in conversation from confused hypotheses to peppy conversation on how everyone was planning to spend their break and what they had in mind for 2nd meal.
“Well I can see everyone’s excited for lunch, and who am I to disappoint,” chuckling Bernard waved us all up from our seats, pocketing his pad from the podium and heading to open the classroom door for us, “Enjoy your break, get a good rest along with a hearty meal, and I’ll see you all back here at the usual time.”
As everyone else filed out I stayed behind, waving at Sandi and Kailo as they left, and pawing over to Bernard once he and I were the only ones left in the room.
Ears folded down and with an apologetic tinge in my voice I greeted him as I sidled up to him, “Hey Bernard, I uh… sorry if that last question was unexpected.”
Chortling in reply, Bernard waved a hand through the air in a sign I’d come to understand meant ‘not a problem’.
“No need to apologise Rysel. It was a good question and most certainly not a problem.”
Heh, called it.
I sighed, allowing tension I didn’t realise I’d been holding to relax itself from my shoulders, “Phew, that’s a relief. I’m glad. I’m curious to hear what this new lesson is you’ve got in store for us by the way.”
Bernard wagged a finger at me, throwing up his eyebrows in mock amazement, “Oh are you now? Well I’m afraid you’ll have to remain curious for the time being. It’s going to be quite the surprise if all goes to plan. But…”
He trailed off, glancing at me before looking to the door like he was making sure no one else was around.
Wait, is he going to tell me? Oh please yes let me know now!
Stopping myself from jumping on the spot in excited anticipation, and trying my damndest to stop my tail from wagging in equal measure, I stared up at Bernard as he stewed in his thoughts before turning back to face me.
“I can’t tell you the specifics, but I’m working with Alejandro and Tolim to get something together. A trip that’s not a trip as it were. And when it happens, I’m going to need a few of the more accepting members of the class to lend me a hand. I’m hoping you and a couple others will be able to help with that?”
A trip that’s not a trip? What does that mean? Agh who cares about that right now! Bernard’s relying on me to help out!
Still trying not to keep myself from bouncing around with pup like glee I swished my tail and nodded my head in joint agreement, happy to help with whatever Bernard had in store for us, “Of course! Anything you need I’ll be there to lend a paw. You can count on me!”
A broad warm smile lit up Bernard's face, a hand patting me on the shoulder in appreciation, “Thank you Rysel. I knew I could rely on you but it still warms my heart to hear it. And, as thanks for this and for the many times you’ve shown your support, the surprise includes a little something special I think you’d appreciate the most.”
If my earlier enthusiasm had been at a nine, then the implication of a supposed gift sent it rocketing all the way to a hundred in a heartbeat.
“Wait… WHAT!? What do you mean? What are you doing?”
As impossible as it seemed, Bernard's grin grew even wider as I almost lost myself in wool shaking exhilaration, “Call it my own form of Koala diplomacy. But I’m afraid that’s all I can say for now. Wouldn’t want to ruin the surprise even for you!”
“Oh you ass!” Whistling jovially I bapped my tail against Bernard’s leg in fake indignation, evoking a barking bellowing laugh from the man himself.
Still laughing, the two of us departed the class and made for the canteen, my rumbling stomach leading me on while my mind spun with fantastical thoughts as to what Bernard had prepared for us.
And what specifically he had in store for me.
submitted by Still_Performance_39 to NatureofPredators [link] [comments]
Hey, I hope everyone's doing well!
Today we return to the namesake of this fic, an actual lesson about animals. This one focuses on Koalas! One of Australia's most recognisable critters. I hope you enjoy.
It's hardly worth mentioning, seeing as I'm an infrequent poster at the best of times, but I'll not have another chapter out for a few weeks due to limited free time and devoting most of my writing time to an upcoming ficnapping. Be sure to look out for that!
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Memory transcription subject: Rysel, Venlil Environmental Researcher
Date [Standardised human time]: 8th September 2136
“Koalas!”
Bernard’s energised voice boomed through the air as the classroom's monitor flickered into life, images of this paws lecture topic popping up one after the other until the entire screen was filled with a collage of furry quadrupeds.
Squee! I’ll never get tired of this, it’s all so cool!
As usual the sight of something new stirred immediate discussion, hushed murmurs swelling into vibrant discourse in little more than a heartbeat. Most of the class swiftly huddled together into small herds to bounce ideas around while the rest opted to stick to the solace of their own thoughts as they took in the display.
I’d be quite happy in either situation, though seeing as Sandi had already sunk into deep concentration and Kailo had peeled off to talk with Ennerif and Solenk, it seemed the decision had been made for me on this occasion. Wasting no more time on idle inspection of the people around me, I focused my full attention forward, eager to form first impressions before the lesson began in earnest.
Now then, time to make some educated guesses. What traits does this animal have? I wonder if I’ll get any right this paw?
Professional assumptions went paw-in-paw with the lectures, examining and coming up with hypotheses about the specimens was only natural. Recently however, I’d started to make a little game of it to make things even more interesting than usual. A veritable bonfire of ideas had been set ablaze within me, fueled by my newfound knowledge of Earthen wildlife. Every flash and spark of the flame was a fresh theory I could try to apply to the lectures. It was an invigorating exercise that further stoked my unceasing wonderment.
So far I’d only done this once during the previous class and, to my disappointment, I’d not done too well.
I was right when I guessed that chickens were omnivores, but wrong in my assumption that they could fly. And that red thing on their head, the um… what was it called? The comb! Yes, the comb. I thought that was to attract mates, but it regulates body heat instead. It’s fascinating. Oh! Stars damn it I’m rambling!
I bapped my tail against my leg, the soft thud being just enough to snap me back from my runaway thoughts before I went completely wall-eyed. I was becoming more and more accustomed to getting lost in my own head while remaining conscious of the fact; it was happening so frequently now that it was pretty much impossible not to. Now I was able to pull myself back to the world around me without having to rely on someone else shaking me out of it. Most of the time anyway.
Sandi still keeps an eye on me, and Kailo even decided to help out once without being too snide about it. Anyway where was I? Oh yeah, Koalas.
Glancing at the furred animals, two things immediately stood out. Firstly, their eyes were in a more central position on their face. And second, all the images showed them being on or close to trees. There were other noteworthy observations of course, such as the Koala’s prominent nose and rounded features, but they fell to the wayside as I honed in on these points first.
Hmmm… ok. I already know to discount the idea that they’re predators just from eye position, so let’s get that thought out of here. Maybe omnivorous? Herbivore? Agh no, I can’t just guess that for the sake of guessing, that’s the same problem! Hrm, it’s tough making these assumptions now that everything I thought I knew has been turned on its head.
Nevermind, I’ll focus on the other thing. All the trees make me think they’re arboreal, that seems to be a reasonable assumption. I wonder what else they-
Clearing his throat, Bernard broke my concentration, his call for attention silencing the murmuring conversation and redirecting everyone's focus to the lecturer's podium.
His gaze panned across the room as he waited for everyone to settle, a beaming smile lighting up his face, “As ever I’m delighted to see you all get so into the subject matter from the get go. I’m looking forward to hearing what you were discussing should you wish to share. For now though, how about we get started, hm?”
A chorus of merry bleats rang out from across the audience, ears and tails flicking happily in agreement. Bernard's grin grew in tandem with the class's fervour, clasping his hands together enthusiastically as he launched into the lesson, “Excellent! Then let’s get started.”
The pictures on screen dissolved away until only one remained, enlarging to cover the entire monitor with the fluffy grey face of a Koala peacefully reclining in the crook of a tree.
“Ah, there we are,” Bernard’s baritone timbre drifted through the room as he looked up at the image, his own tone reflecting the relaxed attitude of the animal on screen, “He looks so comfortable doesn’t he? Perfectly at peace with the world, not too surprising considering they sleep almost 20 hours a day. A full paw!”
A wave of beeps and gasps rippled through the herd, punctuated by a single yawn-dressed comment from Rova, “A full paw? Hwuuu… jealous.”
Her drowsy remark elicited several whistling giggles from the herd, Bernard's own jovial chortle joining them as he turned to face her, “Late evening Rova?”
I twisted a little in my seat, panning an eye in Rova’s direction just in time to see her bleary eyes bulge open and her ears shoot up, now intensely aware of the fact she hadn’t been as quiet as she thought she had.
Sitting up abruptly, she hastily tapped down errant tufts of wool that’d flared in surprise as she composed herself, though her nervousness at becoming the centre of the class's attention was still plain for all to hear, “Uh- I um… achem, a little bit yes, um- …sorry. Lokki dragged me out to a movie viewing in the rec centre. It went on pretty late.”
A melodramatic bray from the other side of the room drew everyone's ears away from Rova to the now aghast Lokki, paw splayed across his chest in faux indignation, “Dragged you? Well excuse me for trying to broaden your horizons with human movies. That’ll be the list time I- …Ahaaaa…”
Lokki’s theatrics were cut short by a heavy yawn of his own, a swell of whistling laughter rolling through the herd as vibrant bloom lit up his snout, a sight that elicited a particularly amused bleat from Rova.
Turning away from the duo I looked back at Bernard, pleased to see that he was chuckling along with us. Behaviour like Lokki’s would never have been tolerated in my school and university days but, in stark contrast, Bernard revelled in it, the liveliness of his students fueling his own bombastic style of teaching. It was a pleasant change of pace having a teacher who let us all be ourselves in class; provided we weren’t too disruptive to the lesson plan.
Speaking of which.
His laughter still rumbling through the air, Bernard clapped his hands to pull everyone's focus back to him, “Ok, ok, let’s get back to it then shall we? Rova. Lokki. Hopefully the two of you can stay awake long enough until you can grab yourselves a coffee.”
As the class settled down and the last few giggling beeps petered out, Benard pointed a hand to the screen, “So, the Koala. Let’s start simple shall we? They are herbivorous marsupials native to the eastern and southern coasts of Australia. Easily recognised the world over, they are a well known and beloved symbol of their homeland, along with other animals such as the Kangaroo and the Emu. The former of which you might remember from one of our earlier lectures.”
Indeed I did remember, along with how angry Bernard had gotten after some speh-head had derided the Yotul after he explained how he held specific disdain for such attitudes.
Uuuggghh… I never want to see him angry again. So chilling.
I shook my ears in an effort to dismiss the unpleasant memory, panning my eyes back to the monitor to try and distract myself by inspecting the Koala’s physical appearance once more. Thankfully, by some Star's blessed intervention, Bernard had the exact same idea.
“Koala’s are rather squat in stature, ranging around sixty to eighty-five centimetres in length and weighing little more than fifteen to sixteen kilograms at their full size. As you can see, the fur of this fellow before you is a lovely silvery grey, but their fur can also sport a chocolaty brown hue as well. Arguably the most distinctive part of their appearance is their head, being rather large for their body size and having rounded ears, a large nose, and a pair of small eyes. These are often brown but variations do occur.”
It didn’t slip past my notice that Bernard didn’t bother to point out that the Koala’s eyes were forward facing. I didn’t think he’d simply forgotten, so perhaps he just felt it wasn’t necessary given that he’d already stated it was herbivorous. Either way, no one stuck up a paw or tail to question him.
“Now this will hardly be surprising considering how long they sleep, but Koala’s are largely sedentary and it’s rather easy to see why when you have a look into the contents of their diet.”
With the press of a button the Koala on screen was replaced by images of vibrant green vegetation. Soaring trees and flowering shrubbery weaved together across landscape framed pictures pulled admiring trills from the herd, the diversity of the plant life being shown standing as a reminder that it wasn’t only animal life that flourished on Earth.
After giving everyone the chance to take in the picturesque scenes, Bernard casually hammered that point home, “This is eucalyptus or, more accurately, a choice selection of more than 700 plants belonging to the eucalyptus genus, though the Koala itself favours 30 of them in particular.”
700!? Stars…
Realising that my ears had drooped in my momentary awe, I twisted them back to tune into the lesson, only for them to splay out in shock at the next words to come out of Bernard's mouth.
“The leaves of these plants are the primary food source of the Koala and there are a couple things worth mentioning when talking about these plants. For starters they do not have much nutritional or caloric value, leading to the Koala’s low-energy lifestyle. Additionally, they contain toxic compounds.”
A shiver instantly ran through the herd, ears flicking rapidly in confusion and alarm followed by a few quizzical whispers. It didn’t take long for someone to decide to give a proper voice to the murmuring.
“Excuse me Doctor. Did we hear that right? Their diet is made up of toxic flora?” Vlek’s grumbling incredulity cut through the herd's mutterings with ease. Until Kailo’s recent change of heart, the fifty something rotation old blonde Venlil had been a close second in terms of scepticism. Mercifully his rebuttals had always been relevant questions as opposed to ranting diatribes, so he at least remained on topic if nothing else.
Bernard nodded in confirmation, smiling back at Vlek while absentmindedly twirling the end of his moustache, “You heard me right, they do indeed consume plants that are toxic. Just not to them.”
Any worry or uncertainty still clinging to the herd was swept away by the provision of the glaringly obvious answer, leaving me chuckling inwardly at the oversight.
Ah of course! The plant might be poisonous but they’ll have evolved to deal with that. Stars… I’m so used to expecting the unexpected with Earth that I didn’t even consider the simplest solution.
“I see, thank you Doctor,” Vlek replied, a tinge of interest still audible in his tone, “I assume they’ve developed some adaptation to become immune to the harmful effects?”
The question immediately evoked a smirk from our teacher, but he hurriedly suppressed it while bobbing his head, “They have indeed. There are several factors that aid in their digestion of eucalyptus leaves without succumbing to the plant's baleful properties. The first is a part of the intestinal tract called the cecum. It contains a microbiome that allows the Koala to digest the eucalyptus. Coupled with this is an enzyme in the Koala’s liver that helps them break down the toxins. They are also capable of sniffing out the plants with the least amount of toxins, ensuring that they ingest as little as possible.”
Pausing for a breath Bernard looked back at the screen before turning to face us, another grin curling at the edges of his mouth as he continued with his explanation, “This is mostly for adult Koala’s, because while their young also possess these same adaptations, they don’t just go straight to munching through foliage right after being born. No, they need a little help making that jump and getting a stomach full of all that good gut bacteria. It’s nothing bad, but those of a sensitive stomach may wish to prepare themselves for this next part.”
Bernard’s assurances did little to assuage the concern that his warning had foisted upon us. Having been exposed to so much of the weirdness Earth had to offer everyone always ended up on edge whenever Bernard gave advice like this, even if he did say it in jest.
What strange nonsense thing do Koala pups do then? Judging by the way he’s acting it probably isn’t something as simple as drinking milk from the mother. Hmmm…
“So,” Bernard began, snapping us from our pensive stupor, “Young Koala’s, known as joeys, have a gestation period of thirty-five days on average, which is approximately forty-two paws. Once born they travel from the birth canal to a pouch in their mother so that they can continue to develop and grow. In the pouch the joey finds and latches onto one of two teats and these provide the newborn with a steady stream of nourishing milk. It spends the next six to seven months growing in the pouch, its eyes, ears, and fur all developing as time goes on.”
Okay, interesting. But this is exactly how I thought it’d go. What’s different?
The unexpected normalcy of the Koala’s birth and growth cycle had calmed everyone's nerves, only to be replaced with an air of suspicion as we waited with rapt attention for Bernard to drop the other claw and upend our expectations like he always did.
Not wanting to keep us in further suspense he forged ahead, the tempo of his voice picking up as the smile started to crease his face once more, “Now to make the switch from milk to eucalyptus, the mother also feeds the joey a substance called pap. It comes from the cecum I mentioned earlier, and contains all the gut bacteria required to help the young Koala in making the switch to eucalyptus.”
He stopped and looked around, searching us for a reaction to what I felt was a rather bland statement of fact. What was it he was saying without actually saying? Koala pups drink milk to mature and then include this pap substance so that they can start eating plants. I don’t see what-
The cecum is part of the intestine.
I blinked.
I blinked again, the intrusive interruption scouring my brain clean of any other thought bar the one it’d just implanted itself in the forefront of my mind.
Oh stars. They-
“They eat their own poop!?”
The shocked bleat shattered the peace of the room to reveal that most if not all of us had come to the same tail curling conclusion. As the hall filled with unrestrained vocalisations of disgust, an ‘Ugh’ over here and a ‘Blegh’ over there, Bernard’s own bellowing laughter joined the throng of voices.
“Ha! Everytime! Each and every time. Clearly it doesn’t matter if my students are Human or Venlil. Whenever someone learns about the Koala’s dietary development the reaction is the same!”
Pleased with himself beyond reason, Bernard chuckled away while the rest of us grappled with this ghastly reality. While there were plenty of animals that feasted on things that ranged from simply unappealing all the way to the stomach churningly grotesque, I’d never heard of an animal that actively consumed the excrement of its own species. Benefits aside, the prospect of having to do that to survive to adulthood sent a shiver of revulsion down my spine.
Ewww… Stars, I hope I forget this feeling by 2nd meal. They’re serving sturen and magamroot stew later. I was really looking forward to it.
With the herds mood beginning to temper Bernard tapped the podiums controls, removing the verdant collage of eucalyptus to display several similar yet distinct environments, still chortling merrily to himself in the process, “Ok then, with that little foray into their diet complete, why don’t we look at their habitat in more detail? As you might imagine given their diet and arboreal nature, Koala’s live in forested regions, and can be found in tropical and temperate zones. About a century ago they were classed as a vulnerable species, however efforts were made to turn this around and increase their numbers. Sadly the largest factor in their decline was human activity, as the fertile lands that gave rise to their bountiful forests were coveted farm land for our settlements.”
It was strange to hear Bernard so matter of factly admit to humanity's negative impacts on other species. He’d alluded to such things in the past but always with an air of caution, carefully pawing the line between honestly answering a question while not painting humanity as uncaring and destructive. AKA, the ‘predators’ we’d all initially expected them to be.
Perhaps his comfort in making such admissions was a reflection of the class's comfort with him, for no one so much as batted an ear. Even Kailo, who I would’ve expected to jump at the chance to use this as a prime example of predatory danger, only flicked an ear in stern yet silent concern.
A cough from Bernard drew my attention back, a new picture on screen that showed a forest from a bird's-eye view. Drawn across the image were around a dozen ringed areas, some bordering one another while others overlapped to some degree. It took me a moment, but I soon recognised that what I was looking at was a map, the rings representing what I assumed to be territories. And it didn’t take much effort to guess who each one belonged to.
“From habitats we move onto behaviours, so let’s start with territories. Koala’s are solitary animals. Yes, despite being herbivores. Considering they’re only awake for roughly four hours of the day I can hardly blame them. Lots to do and not a lot of time to do it. Jokes aside, once they mature they are quite independent, carving out a little slice of land for themselves, as displayed in this example, called a Home Range. That is not to say they go it alone and leave everything else behind however. Rather, as shown in the map behind me, they live in their own space while still being part of a larger social group.”
With another press of his pad the picture was updated to show one of two symbols in each segment, along with a key to the side of the map displayed in helpful Venlang. A quick glance told me that the symbols were representing whether the territory belonged to a male or female of the species.
“As you can see there is quite a bit of overlap between different Koala’s territories. It is in these areas that most of the socialising takes place between neighbours. The trees in these locations represent the few areas where intrusion across territories is acceptable for the sake of social interaction. Outside of that the Koala’s stick to their own territories for the most part, with the exceptions of Koala’s who are passing through, attempting to become part of the social group themselves, or dominant males who sometimes go off into another Koala’s range. But how do they know where one range begins and another range ends you might ask? Well, this brings us onto the next part of the lecture. How do Koala’s communicate?”
Wiping away the map from the monitor, Bernard loaded up a video of a Koala sitting in a tree and pressed play. Head held high, the Koala’s body shook as it belted out a reverberating call into the wilderness that could only be described as a garbled combination of a car engine failing to turn over mixed with the hiccups of someone with a particularly sore throat.
That’s how they sound? Oof that must be rough on the lungs.
I clearly wasn’t the only one to share such a thought, because I clocked Sandi tracing a paw along her neck as the noise went on, ears fluttering in discomfort at the noise.
Bernard himself cleared his own throat as the video came to an end, minimising it and replacing it with another image of a tree with a Koala rubbing up against the bark, “I think they’ve got me beat on who’s got the deeper voice!”
His joke garnered several amused beeps, a rare reaction that caused a beaming smile to shine across his face at lighting speed, “Oh you’re too kind. I’ll be here all week. Now where were we? Oh yes! Communication. As you’ve just heard, Koala’s are capable of loud low pitched bellows that can carry over vast distances. These express everything from ‘Hello I’m over here’ to ‘This is my turf, stay away’. Bellowing is more common in the males than the females, opting for shouting matches as opposed to outright fights when it comes to asserting dominance. Other vocal expressions include grunts, wails, and snarls if they’re acting particularly angsty. Mother and joey pairs also communicate through gentle clicking, squeaking, and murmuring sounds. And there’s one more thing worth mentioning. Something they have in common with Humans and Venlil when it comes to emoting.”
Really? They do something we do?
Curious, I pressed myself against the desk, straining as close as I could to once more scrutinise the Koala’s features. Not a lot stood out to me at first, the grey marsupial not sharing many similarities with a Venlil that I could identify.
Ok think. We show emotion with our ears, tails, and our wool on occasion. They don’t have tails so it’s obviously not that. Wool standing on end is more a reaction than a conscious expression. So it must be the ears then.
To my quiet satisfaction, my hunch was soon validated by Bernard, “As well as their vocalisations, Koala’s are very emotive through their facial features. Just like humans, they use their mouths and lips to show how they feel, but these tend more towards the aggressive side of the scale than what you might see on a human. Regarding yourselves however, Koala’s utilise their ears in tandem with their mouth movements when showing strong emotion.”
I was delighted to hear that my assumption was correct, a little happy flick twisting out through my tail and bapping against my chair with a muted thump against the plastic.
Hehe yes! Got one right!
“Now then, we are getting close to lunchtime so I’ll finish this segment off with something I think you’ll find particularly interesting. Diplomacy.”
Perplexed mutterings followed in the wake of the bizarre inclusion to the lecture, my own thoughts being dominated by bewilderment as I tried and failed to make sense of how the two could possibly be related.
Why would Koala’s, or any animal for that matter, be linked to diplomacy? Hmmm...
I could understand dispatching exterminators to deal with a predator issue as a show of goodwill, that at least includes animals, but Humans aren’t like that so I think I can safely scratch that off the list.
Maybe the humans who live in that region benefited from Koala’s in some way. Could they have gotten something from them? But what?
Hopefully not what the pups get from their mothers.
Agh no! Begone awful intrusive thoughts. Blegh! I don’t need that in my head.
As I wrestled with the short-lived revulsion inflicted upon me by my Star's damned subconscious, Bernard placed a new image on screen, one that was decidedly different from all that had preceded it.
On screen were more than a couple dozen pictures of humans. Some were pictured alone while others congregated in large groups while cameras surrounded them from all angles. Across all the images, I noted two common themes. First of all, a solid majority of the humans were wearing formal wear similar to what I’d seen worn by UN representatives on TV. If the gaggle of journalists in the background of the photos didn’t already confirm my suspicions, then it was this similarity which made me conclude they were all people of some importance. Likely politicians judging from context clues.
Secondly, each of the individuals was interacting with a Koala in some form. Some cradled one against their chests while others were feeding it eucalyptus leaves or pellets of some kind. One of the assumed politicians had become an impromptu bed for a snoozing bundle of fur, a gleeful smile spread across their face as they lovingly gazed down at the sleeping Koala in their lap.
As I continued to stare at the assorted photos something clicked into place, a sudden spark flickering into life. A burgeoning light of comprehension that flared and swelled with every wide-eyed breath I took. Some things still escaped me, things I hoped would soon be explained, but in staring at all of the humans happy smiling faces, I was struck with an instant of pure understanding.
If someone, say a Nevok for instance, offered to gift me a creature that was common to them but which might exotic and breathtaking to a Venlil, how could my feelings not be swayed? How could I walk away from that encounter and not have grown closer to them as a result?
“Koala diplomacy,” Bernard waved his hand up at the monitor, a slight reverence in his tone, “My favourite kind of soft power diplomacy. Where political leaders take photo ops with Koala’s and, on occasion, the Australian government loans Koala’s to other nations for a time to bolster positive relations. It certainly helps that Koala’s are a beloved animal worldwide, drawing large crowds and revenue for countries fortunate enough to host the adorable critters.”
The truly alien concept predictably sparked instant discussion in the herd, two polar opposite schools of thought swiftly cementing themselves as the most popular opinions. Simultaneously, I heard one voice trill excitedly while another scoffed at what they clearly saw as a ridiculous and offensive notion.
“Squee! That’d be so cool! I’d love to get the chance to see a Liri from Coila. Remember the Rainbow Boa? Think of that shimmering effect and colour but put it on a bird! Ah! I’ve only heard their song on video. It’d be a treat to hear it in person!”
Ooo! I’ve read about them! I’d love to get up close to one.
“Loaning. As if animals are property to be hoarded and traded? Pugh! Another predatory trait the humans don’t want to acknowledge for what it is.”
Ugh, typical. Jump right to the worst possible option.
However, despite my dismissal of their disparaging fumings, an uncomfortable thought pressed upon my mind. While it was plain to see how much humans cared for the Koala, it didn’t change the fact that humans did keep animals as property just as the scornful herd member had said.
This begged a rather important, disquieting question. Aside from keeping some animals as cattle, a stomach tightening minefield I had no desire to step a claw onto right now, how else did humans keep other creatures. And how did they treat them?
Before I was fully conscious of doing it my paw was in the air, the question primed on my tongue.
Noticing my elevated paw Bernard pointed at me, smiling warmly, “Yes Rysel? What’s on your mind?”
Sorry Bernard. I hope this one’s not too awkward for you to answer.
Flicking my ear in appreciation, and waiting for everyone to settle enough so that I could be heard, I voiced my concerns as neutrally as possible, “Thank you Doctor. I uh, just had a thought. We know that humans keep certain animals for… particular reasons, and we know why. From how you’ve spoken about Koala’s I think it's fair to say that the same cannot be said for them. However, this makes me wonder, what other reasons do humans have for keeping animals and how do you treat them?”
A flash of surprise blinked across Bernard's eyes but vanished so quickly that it felt like I’d imagined it. Had he not expected such a question? Maybe he was just shocked that it’d been me who’d ended up asking it?
Stars, am I so predictable that no one expects me to ask difficult questions?
Unfortunately, a quick glance at my deskmates seemed to prove that to be the case, as both Sandi and Kailo were looking at me with differing degrees of astonishment flapping in their ears.
Well speh.
“A very good point Rysel, certainly one that’s worth raising. Yet another example of you all anticipating what I have to say before I can bring it up myself.” Bernard tapped the podium, switching off the monitor before returning his focus to me, “We won’t be needing that. I’ve nothing prepared that I can show you and we’re heading to lunch in a few minutes anyway. Still, that’s plenty of time to give you a bit of an answer.”
A bit? What does he mean just a bit?
Made even more curious by Bernard's preempted admission that he wasn’t going to fully answer my query, I dialled both my ears on him, fixing him with an inquisitive stare as he started to explain with a tone that was noticeably more nonchalant than any of his previous explanations.
“So, animals in captivity for reasons other than what you already know. Honestly I would love to delve into other reasons regarding why we keep animals. However, I have a lesson plan in the works that I hope to share with you all in the not too distant future. Some of it touches upon this very topic and I’d quite like to bundle it all together. That said, I can tell you how animals in captivity are treated. In short, the answer is very well. There are a mountain of laws both on private and public interests that govern the standards and ethical treatment of animals, and breaches of these laws are quite severe even for relatively minor infractions.”
While I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t disappointed by the vague answer to what was really the bulk of my question, I was at least satisfied by Bernard’s assurances that animals in captivity, such as the Koala, were well looked after. Considering the barely subdued grumbling coming from some corners of the audience it was clear that several of the herd didn’t believe Bernard outright, but I trusted him to be honest. Additionally, the mention of an upcoming lecture focused on humans keeping animals caused quite the buzz.
I felt a mix of excitement and trepidation at exploring the topic further. He’d pretty much confirmed we wouldn’t be talking about cattle farms, for which I was relieved, but that still left a huge amount of uncertainty in what was to come.
Humans keeping animals as cattle was a forgone conclusion. As horrifying as that reality was, it was one I could understand from a detached and strictly clinical point of view. Being predators they ate meat and therefore they kept cattle. But the concept of keeping animals for any other reason baffled me.
What could be the purpose? The diplomacy thing makes sense now that I have context, but what other reasons could they have.
The class's discussions were interrupted by the recognisable ring of the break bell, the shift in attention eliciting a change in conversation from confused hypotheses to peppy conversation on how everyone was planning to spend their break and what they had in mind for 2nd meal.
“Well I can see everyone’s excited for lunch, and who am I to disappoint,” chuckling Bernard waved us all up from our seats, pocketing his pad from the podium and heading to open the classroom door for us, “Enjoy your break, get a good rest along with a hearty meal, and I’ll see you all back here at the usual time.”
As everyone else filed out I stayed behind, waving at Sandi and Kailo as they left, and pawing over to Bernard once he and I were the only ones left in the room.
Ears folded down and with an apologetic tinge in my voice I greeted him as I sidled up to him, “Hey Bernard, I uh… sorry if that last question was unexpected.”
Chortling in reply, Bernard waved a hand through the air in a sign I’d come to understand meant ‘not a problem’.
“No need to apologise Rysel. It was a good question and most certainly not a problem.”
Heh, called it.
I sighed, allowing tension I didn’t realise I’d been holding to relax itself from my shoulders, “Phew, that’s a relief. I’m glad. I’m curious to hear what this new lesson is you’ve got in store for us by the way.”
Bernard wagged a finger at me, throwing up his eyebrows in mock amazement, “Oh are you now? Well I’m afraid you’ll have to remain curious for the time being. It’s going to be quite the surprise if all goes to plan. But…”
He trailed off, glancing at me before looking to the door like he was making sure no one else was around.
Wait, is he going to tell me? Oh please yes let me know now!
Stopping myself from jumping on the spot in excited anticipation, and trying my damndest to stop my tail from wagging in equal measure, I stared up at Bernard as he stewed in his thoughts before turning back to face me.
“I can’t tell you the specifics, but I’m working with Alejandro and Tolim to get something together. A trip that’s not a trip as it were. And when it happens, I’m going to need a few of the more accepting members of the class to lend me a hand. I’m hoping you and a couple others will be able to help with that?”
A trip that’s not a trip? What does that mean? Agh who cares about that right now! Bernard’s relying on me to help out!
Still trying not to keep myself from bouncing around with pup like glee I swished my tail and nodded my head in joint agreement, happy to help with whatever Bernard had in store for us, “Of course! Anything you need I’ll be there to lend a paw. You can count on me!”
A broad warm smile lit up Bernard's face, a hand patting me on the shoulder in appreciation, “Thank you Rysel. I knew I could rely on you but it still warms my heart to hear it. And, as thanks for this and for the many times you’ve shown your support, the surprise includes a little something special I think you’d appreciate the most.”
If my earlier enthusiasm had been at a nine, then the implication of a supposed gift sent it rocketing all the way to a hundred in a heartbeat.
“Wait… WHAT!? What do you mean? What are you doing?”
As impossible as it seemed, Bernard's grin grew even wider as I almost lost myself in wool shaking exhilaration, “Call it my own form of Koala diplomacy. But I’m afraid that’s all I can say for now. Wouldn’t want to ruin the surprise even for you!”
“Oh you ass!” Whistling jovially I bapped my tail against Bernard’s leg in fake indignation, evoking a barking bellowing laugh from the man himself.
Still laughing, the two of us departed the class and made for the canteen, my rumbling stomach leading me on while my mind spun with fantastical thoughts as to what Bernard had prepared for us.
And what specifically he had in store for me.
2024.05.21 22:38 adulting4kids Tarot Symbolism
Number 1:
- Initiation: Represents new beginnings, leadership, and individuality.
- The Magician: Tarot card associated with the number 1, symbolizing creativity, manifestation, and willpower.
- Independence: Signifies self-reliance, originality, and taking the lead.
- Potential and Possibility: Embodies the start of a journey or a project.
- Unity: Reflects the oneness, the start of something unique and singular.
Number 2:
- Duality: Signifies balance, partnerships, and cooperation.
- The High Priestess: Associated with intuition, wisdom, and hidden knowledge in tarot.
- Harmony: Represents the need for balance and diplomacy.
- Relationships: Emphasizes partnerships, teamwork, and cooperation.
- Choice: Reflects decisions, choices, and the need for balance.
Number 3:
- Creativity: Symbolizes self-expression, communication, and creative endeavors.
- The Empress: Tarot card embodying fertility, creativity, and abundance.
- Optimism: Represents joy, enthusiasm, and social interaction.
- Expansion: Signifies growth, self-improvement, and broadening horizons.
- Manifestation: Reflects the power of thoughts, words, and actions in creating reality.
Number 4:
- Stability: Signifies structure, order, and a solid foundation.
- The Emperor: Tarot card embodying authority, stability, and structure.
- Security: Represents practicality, reliability, and building a strong base.
- Endurance: Symbolizes persistence, hard work, and discipline.
- Materialization: Reflects the manifestation of ideas into tangible results.
Number 5:
- Change: Represents adaptability, versatility, and transformation.
- The Hierophant: Tarot card symbolizing tradition, guidance, and spiritual growth.
- Freedom: Signifies exploration, adventure, and embracing diversity.
- Shifts and Challenges: Reflects unexpected changes and the need for flexibility.
- Versatility: Embodies adaptability, resourcefulness, and embracing new experiences.
Number 6:
- Harmony: Signifies balance, responsibility, and nurturing relationships.
- The Lovers: Tarot card representing love, harmony, and choices in relationships.
- Service: Reflects selflessness, compassion, and community involvement.
- Healing: Symbolizes peace, empathy, and creating harmonious environments.
- Balance: Embodies equilibrium, diplomacy, and a harmonious lifestyle.
Number 7:
- Spirituality: Signifies introspection, wisdom, and spiritual growth.
- The Chariot: Tarot card embodying willpower, determination, and progress.
- Seeking Truth: Reflects introspection, seeking answers, and inner wisdom.
- Analysis: Symbolizes deep thinking, research, and intellectual pursuits.
- Inner Guidance: Embodies intuition, mysticism, and inner awareness.
Number 8:
- Achievement: Represents success, abundance, and material prosperity.
- Strength: Tarot card symbolizing inner strength, resilience, and determination.
- Power and Success: Reflects ambition, authority, and material wealth.
- Karma: Symbolizes cause and effect, balance in action and consequence.
- Manifestation: Embodies material gains, business acumen, and financial stability.
Number 9:
- Completion: Signifies endings, spiritual fulfillment, and humanitarianism.
- The Hermit: Tarot card embodying introspection, wisdom, and spiritual enlightenment.
- Universal Love: Reflects compassion, service to humanity, and global consciousness.
- Wisdom and Leadership: Symbolizes altruism, leadership, and guiding others.
- Transformation: Embodies closure, spiritual awakening, and a broader perspective.
Number 10:
- Completion and Renewal: Signifies endings and new beginnings simultaneously.
- Wheel of Fortune: Tarot card representing cycles, destiny, and unforeseen changes.
- Wholeness: Reflects fulfillment, achievement, and cycles coming to fruition.
- Transformation: Symbolizes change, fate, and the cyclical nature of life.
- Karmic Balance: Embodies the law of cause and effect, the balance of energies.
Number 11:
- Master Illuminator: Signifies spiritual awakening, intuition, and enlightenment.
- Justice (or Strength in some decks): Tarot card embodying fairness, balance, and divine guidance.
- Enlightenment: Reflects intuition, inspiration, and high spiritual awareness.
- Higher Calling: Symbolizes spiritual guidance, psychic abilities, and divine insights.
- Visionary Leadership: Embodies visionary ideas, inspiration, and spiritual mentorship.
Number 12:
- Harmonious Union: Signifies partnerships, cooperation, and balanced relationships.
- The Hanged Man: Tarot card symbolizing surrender, perspective shift, and sacrifice for enlightenment.
- Sacrifice for Growth: Reflects letting go, patience, and seeing things from a different angle.
- Adaptability: Symbolizes flexibility, suspension, and altering perspectives.
- Transformational Insight: Embodies spiritual growth through surrender and acceptance.
Number 13:
- Transformation and Rebirth: Signifies change, transition, and new opportunities.
- Death: Tarot card representing transformation, endings, and profound change leading to renewal.
- Transition and Renewal: Reflects release, transformation, and the start of something new.
- Renewed Perspective: Symbolizes rebirth, regeneration, and shedding old patterns.
- Power of Endings: Embodies closure, regeneration, and the birth of something new.
Number 14:
- Practical Manifestation: Signifies grounded action, stability, and accomplishment.
- Temperance: Tarot card embodying balance, moderation, and spiritual harmony.
- Moderation and Balance: Reflects harmony, patience, and blending opposites.
- Alchemy: Symbolizes transformation, adaptation, and spiritual equilibrium.
- Integration of Duality: Embodies combining elements to create a harmonious whole.
Number 15:
- Change and Transformation: Signifies shifts, transitions, and adaptability.
- The Devil: Tarot card representing materialism, bondage, and self-limiting beliefs.
- Personal Freedom: Reflects breaking free from limitations, temptations, or restrictions.
- Inner Exploration: Symbolizes shadow work, self-awareness, and breaking unhealthy patterns.
- Choice and Liberation: Embodies freeing oneself from restrictions or unhealthy attachments.
Number 16:
- Spiritual Awakening: Signifies spiritual growth, divine intervention, and new beginnings.
- The Tower: Tarot card embodying sudden change, upheaval, and revelation leading to transformation.
- Sudden Change: Reflects upheaval, awakening, and revelation.
- Awakening to Truth: Symbolizes enlightenment, liberation, and profound insights.
- Transformational Crisis: Embodies breaking down old structures for spiritual evolution.
Number 17:
- Manifestation and Power: Signifies success, authority, and material abundance.
- The Star: Tarot card representing hope, inspiration, and spiritual guidance.
- Optimism and Healing: Reflects hope, faith, and finding inner guidance.
- Divine Intervention: Symbolizes grace, blessings, and spiritual renewal.
- Illumination and Guidance: Embodies finding direction and renewed faith.
Number 18:
- Karmic Completion: Signifies accomplishment, fulfillment, and achievement.
- The Moon: Tarot card symbolizing intuition, illusion, and the subconscious mind.
- Unveiling the Unseen: Reflects mystery, intuition, and subconscious revelations.
- Inner Reflection: Symbolizes introspection, dreams, and hidden truths.
- Transition to Higher Wisdom: Embodies uncovering hidden aspects for spiritual evolution.
Number 19:
- Fulfillment and Success: Signifies attainment, completion, and reaching goals.
- The Sun: Tarot card embodying joy, success, and positive outcomes.
- Abundance and Vitality: Reflects happiness, vitality, and illumination.
- Inner Child: Symbolizes innocence, playfulness, and embracing the joy of life.
- Celebration of Achievement: Embodies success, happiness, and realization of dreams.
Number 20:
- Integration and Fulfillment: Signifies completion of a cycle and a sense of wholeness.
- Judgment: Tarot card embodying spiritual awakening, renewal, and rebirth.
- Rebirth and Redemption: Reflects resurrection, spiritual awakening, and inner calling.
- Transformational Shift: Symbolizes a new phase, karmic retribution, and self-reflection.
- Resolution and Clarity: Embodies closure, resolution, and a fresh start.
Number 21:
- Unity and Completion: Signifies the combination of wisdom and fulfillment.
- The World: Tarot card representing fulfillment, completion, and mastery of life's cycles.
- Wholeness and Integration: Reflects achievement, fulfillment, and a sense of accomplishment.
- Mastery and Enlightenment: Symbolizes mastery over life's lessons and embracing new beginnings.
- Culmination and Success: Embodies achievement, fulfillment, and a broader perspective.
Number 22:
- Master Builder: Signifies the capacity to turn dreams into reality, a powerful force.
- The Fool (in some decks): Tarot card embodying unlimited potential, new beginnings, and the journey of life.
- Visionary Potential: Reflects the potential for extraordinary achievements and spiritual awakening.
- Manifesting Dreams: Symbolizes materializing ambitions, power, and the ability to create.
- Transformational Journey: Embodies spiritual growth, leadership, and a higher purpose.
Number 23:
- Creative Expression: Signifies creative pursuits, artistic talents, and innovative thinking.
- The King of Swords (in some decks): Tarot card representing intellect, clarity, and communication.
- Mental Clarity: Reflects clear thinking, sharp intellect, and diplomatic communication.
- Ambitious Vision: Symbolizes ambitious plans, strategic thinking, and leadership qualities.
- Intellectual Authority: Embodies mental strength, assertiveness, and logical reasoning.
Number 24:
- Nurturing Stability: Signifies caring, support, and creating a secure environment.
- The Queen of Cups (in some decks): Tarot card symbolizing emotional intelligence, compassion, and intuition.
- Compassionate Care: Reflects empathy, sensitivity, and nurturing qualities.
- Emotional Balance: Symbolizes emotional stability, harmonious relationships, and intuitive insights.
- Supportive Energy: Embodies nurturing abilities, empathy, and creating emotional security.
Number 25:
- Adaptability and Curiosity: Signifies versatility, exploration, and adaptability to change.
- The Knight of Pentacles (in some decks): Tarot card representing reliability, dedication, and practicality.
- Steadfast Dedication: Reflects commitment, reliability, and a methodical approach.
- Practical Solutions: Symbolizes a practical mindset, dedication to tasks, and diligent work ethic.
- Resourceful Nature: Embodies a disciplined attitude, reliability, and readiness to adapt.
Number 26:
- Diplomatic Harmony: Signifies balance, cooperation, and creating harmony in relationships.
- The Two of Swords (in some decks): Tarot card embodying decision-making, balance, and compromise.
- Balancing Choices: Reflects decisions, seeking balance, and finding middle ground.
- Peaceful Resolutions: Symbolizes diplomacy, compromise, and finding solutions.
- Harmonious Choices: Embodies choices made with consideration, balance, and peace.
Number 27:
- Wisdom and Compassion: Signifies understanding, spiritual insight, and empathy.
- The Nine of Cups (in some decks): Tarot card representing emotional fulfillment, contentment, and satisfaction.
- Emotional Satisfaction: Reflects happiness, emotional contentment, and spiritual fulfillment.
- Inner Contentment: Symbolizes emotional well-being, satisfaction, and contentedness.
- Gratitude and Fulfillment: Embodies gratitude for blessings, emotional satisfaction, and harmony.
Number 28:
- Achievement and Ambition: Signifies success through hard work, determination, and ambition.
- The Ten of Pentacles (in some decks): Tarot card embodying wealth, abundance, and family legacy.
- Abundance and Legacy: Reflects material success, family prosperity, and ancestral influence.
- Fulfillment of Goals: Symbolizes the accomplishment of long-term goals and material stability.
- Establishing Foundations: Embodies securing foundations, prosperity, and financial stability.
Number 29:
- Wisdom and Intuition: Signifies spiritual wisdom, intuition, and heightened awareness.
- The High Priestess (in some decks): Tarot card symbolizing intuition, mystery, and inner knowledge.
- Intuitive Insights: Reflects hidden knowledge, psychic abilities, and heightened perception.
- Mystical Awareness: Symbolizes esoteric wisdom, inner guidance, and spiritual depth.
- Spiritual Illumination: Embodies divine knowledge, inner mysteries, and esoteric understanding.
2024.05.21 22:37 Reservedbrit Advice on Optimizing Google Ads for B2B Lead Generation
I'm seeking some advice and insights on optimizing my Google Ads campaigns for B2B lead generation, and I'd greatly appreciate your expertise.
Here's a quick overview of my current situation:
submitted by Reservedbrit to googleads [link] [comments]
Here's a quick overview of my current situation:
- Current Strategy: We're using Target Cost per Acquisition as our bidding strategy.
- Campaign Types: We have two main campaign types: branded keywords and non-brand keywords. We've recently paused our competitor campaign and plan to launch a remarketing campaign next week. We also paused our Pmax campaign as this was taking a significant % of budget but an incrementality test showed it had very little impact and was just driving up the cost/conv.
- Challenge: We're currently under-pacing this month compared to the same period last year (YoY) by around 70%. This is specifically for MQL's as those are the primary conversion action currently. We did implement a form filter to exclude free email domains and that pushed the cost/conv. up and reduced our lead numbers. However before the form filter we were getting approx. 50% junk leads. I'm also looking at ways to improve our search improve. share with edits to our landing pages, ad copy and reviewing ad extensions as we are losing approx. 60% due to ad rank.
- Desired Outcome: We want to maximize conversions and close the gap YoY for the campaign performance.
- Bid Optimization: What are some effective strategies for optimizing bids to maximize conversions? Last week we increased the Target CPA and added additional budget freed-up from Pmax. However that hasn't had significant increase. Would it be worth running a different bid strategy? We don't currently have conversion values assigned but are looking into introducing this in the next few weeks.
- Campaigns: We are going to reintroduce our competitor campaign however this won't drive the volume we need and has historically been a bit more of an expensive campaign. We will also be introducing a remarketing display campaign. Any tips for launching and optimizing a remarketing campaign for B2B lead generation?
- Impression share: Any tips on improving ad rank to improve our search impr. share? As mentioned above, I'll be editing landing pages, pushing the form above the fold, making changes to ad copy to improve relevance and reviewing our ad extensions.
2024.05.21 22:35 Ill_Airport2204 Just got my Mirena removed after 6 years! Follow my journey.
I got my Mirena inserted in 2018 (i was 19). It was the most painful experience. The whole time I had it in, I would think about one day getting it removed and would squirm just thinking about going through the pain again, but the removal was honestly pain free.
I had a great experience on the Mirena at first, besides gaining weight. I initially went on it because I always had very irregular, heavy and painful periods. The first 5 years were smooth, I didn’t get any acne, hair loss, mood swings or any side effects some women get. Occasionally I would spot very lightly near my cycle and have very minor cramps. However when year 6 started, I noticed myself getting constant cramps and all the side effects I never had. I was lightly bleeding every two months or so but it was more than spotting. My hair also started falling out like crazy and all of a sudden I have cystic hormonal acne. I got diagnosed with anxiety and depression and was always just tired and not feeling like myself. I noticed I was also gaining weight quicker and no matter how healthy I ate, or how much I worked out. I just can’t lose the weight. There were no major changes to my lifestyle that could have triggered this. (at least i don’t think so) But essentially after not having a regular period for so long, I decided to give my body a break from all the hormones and try to fix my gut and mental health. I’m just very scared to get the Mirena Crash but I’m looking forward to feeling like myself again.
I am on day 0 today but will update weekly my symptoms and any changes I see or feel after getting it removed.
I’m happy to answer any questions. :)
submitted by Ill_Airport2204 to birthcontrol [link] [comments]
I had a great experience on the Mirena at first, besides gaining weight. I initially went on it because I always had very irregular, heavy and painful periods. The first 5 years were smooth, I didn’t get any acne, hair loss, mood swings or any side effects some women get. Occasionally I would spot very lightly near my cycle and have very minor cramps. However when year 6 started, I noticed myself getting constant cramps and all the side effects I never had. I was lightly bleeding every two months or so but it was more than spotting. My hair also started falling out like crazy and all of a sudden I have cystic hormonal acne. I got diagnosed with anxiety and depression and was always just tired and not feeling like myself. I noticed I was also gaining weight quicker and no matter how healthy I ate, or how much I worked out. I just can’t lose the weight. There were no major changes to my lifestyle that could have triggered this. (at least i don’t think so) But essentially after not having a regular period for so long, I decided to give my body a break from all the hormones and try to fix my gut and mental health. I’m just very scared to get the Mirena Crash but I’m looking forward to feeling like myself again.
I am on day 0 today but will update weekly my symptoms and any changes I see or feel after getting it removed.
I’m happy to answer any questions. :)
2024.05.21 22:35 No-Bunch3524 VERSES AI ($VERS) Sets New Standards in AI with Benchmark Tests
VERSES AI ($VERS), a cognitive computing company, is continuing to make big strides in AI. They’ve introduced a research roadmap that outlines the key milestones and benchmarks. This roadmap could revolutionize the development of AI by providing clear goals to measure the progress and importance of $VER's research and development endeavors.
The company plans to use this roadmap this year to monitor its AI progress. Basically, it wants to check whether its approach can be as good as or better than advanced AI models on various industry tests, all while using less data and energy.
By meeting these benchmarks, VERSES can prove that they can create AI that is better, cheaper, and faster. The end goal is to get their AI into more hands through their Genius Platform.
Research Roadmap Highlights:
VERSES’ research roadmap has 3 benchmarks: Classification and generation tasks, Atari 10k Challenge, and NeurIPS 2024 Melting Pot Challenge
The first benchmark, Classification and generation tasks, focuses on proving $VER's approach is better at tasks like recognizing images and creating new ones. By utilizing advanced Bayesian inference techniques, they are trying to show that their method has the ability to outperform traditional deep learning methods. This test is important because it shows whether VERSES can make top-quality AI while being more efficient.
The second benchmark, the Atari 10k Challenge, is all about testing VERSES' AI skills in playing video games. Unlike conventional methods that need a lot of gameplay data, VERSES is trying to play video games almost like a human but with way less practice. $VERS is using active inference to help their AI be super adaptable. And by doing this, they're hoping to raise the bar for how well AI can perform in gaming
Lastly, there’s the NeurIPS 2024 Melting Pot Challenge. This is all about testing how well VERSES' can handle tricky situations where lots of different AI systems need to work together. $VERS wants to show that their AI can understand these complicated situations and work smoothly with other AI systems. Through the use of active inference and explicit representational structures, VERSES aims to become a leader in creating AI systems that can collaborate effectively and tackle complex problems together.
$VERS publicly released this roadmap so the public can track their progress. The roadmap can be accessed here: www.verses.ai/rd-overview
Note: this is not financial advice please do your own research before investing.
submitted by No-Bunch3524 to smallcapsociety [link] [comments]
The company plans to use this roadmap this year to monitor its AI progress. Basically, it wants to check whether its approach can be as good as or better than advanced AI models on various industry tests, all while using less data and energy.
By meeting these benchmarks, VERSES can prove that they can create AI that is better, cheaper, and faster. The end goal is to get their AI into more hands through their Genius Platform.
Research Roadmap Highlights:
VERSES’ research roadmap has 3 benchmarks: Classification and generation tasks, Atari 10k Challenge, and NeurIPS 2024 Melting Pot Challenge
The first benchmark, Classification and generation tasks, focuses on proving $VER's approach is better at tasks like recognizing images and creating new ones. By utilizing advanced Bayesian inference techniques, they are trying to show that their method has the ability to outperform traditional deep learning methods. This test is important because it shows whether VERSES can make top-quality AI while being more efficient.
The second benchmark, the Atari 10k Challenge, is all about testing VERSES' AI skills in playing video games. Unlike conventional methods that need a lot of gameplay data, VERSES is trying to play video games almost like a human but with way less practice. $VERS is using active inference to help their AI be super adaptable. And by doing this, they're hoping to raise the bar for how well AI can perform in gaming
Lastly, there’s the NeurIPS 2024 Melting Pot Challenge. This is all about testing how well VERSES' can handle tricky situations where lots of different AI systems need to work together. $VERS wants to show that their AI can understand these complicated situations and work smoothly with other AI systems. Through the use of active inference and explicit representational structures, VERSES aims to become a leader in creating AI systems that can collaborate effectively and tackle complex problems together.
$VERS publicly released this roadmap so the public can track their progress. The roadmap can be accessed here: www.verses.ai/rd-overview
Note: this is not financial advice please do your own research before investing.
2024.05.21 22:31 Accomplished_Sign_29 Losing my mind
idk if anyone can help with this but i’m the type of person that has planned out every millisecond of my life and I’m a planner. I’m also Taurus if my zodiac sign has anything to do with it I’m freshly turned 21 years old, but I stress myself out so much and I panic over everything I was supposed to take the LSAT in these next upcoming months but I feel like I’m not ready because I haven’t studied enough and because of this my brain just all of a sudden tells me that I’m gonna be a failure and that I’m not on track because I’m not sticking to the plan anything that I do different in life according to what I had planned to do, I just start freaking out and overthink and thinking that the worst possible scenario is gonna happen to me and then all these thoughts just keep coming in my brain and like I can’t breathe like I can’t relax I’m stressed. I’m panicking about everything. I have all these different stress and worrying thoughts in my brain that just completely take over I don’t know what this is, don’t wanna like self diagnose myself with some type of mental disorder or say I have mental health issues because I never have. I tried googling what this means but it was no help so if someone can help me out, I have no idea what it is I need to stop stressing out, but my brain physically will not let me it consumes me. Literally every single day. I’m too young to have this much stress and panic and like anxiousness going on so if anyone has any answers for me, Thanks.
submitted by Accomplished_Sign_29 to MentalHealthSupport [link] [comments]
2024.05.21 22:31 IntelligentBerry7363 My highly optimistic list for remaining DLC for WH3
Note: this list is based on CA's comments that they were planning on releasing smaller scale DLCs more frequently, hence the return to two-Race packs. Also I'm basing this partly on rumours that there would only be about 4-6 DLCs left (huffing hopium and going for the highest end here), that the next pack would be Ogres vs Cathay and that the last pack would involve Nagash and Neferata.
1) THE MONKEY & THE MERCENARY (Cathay vs Ogre Kingdoms)
Cathay:
LL: The Monkey King
LH: A warrior monk special character
GL: Some king of monkey man chieftain, a monstrous infantry sized brawler
GH: A celestial dragon monk hero
Units: Celestial dragon monks (possible variants with and without guandaos), Monkey warriors (monstrous infantry), tiger-men (quasi-monstrous cavalry similar to skinwolves), some new monster like a kirin or jade temple dogs.
Ogres:
LL: Golgfag Maneater
LH: Bragg the Gutsman
GL: Some kind of Maneater Lord
GH: Ogre Bruiser
Units: Yhetees, Thundertusks, a new variant or two of Maneaters, Gnoblar manbiters or pigback riders
FLC LL: Li Dao
2) THE HOUND & THE WOLF (Khorne vs Empire)
Khorne:
LL: Arbaal the Undefeated
LH: Kharnak
GL: Doombull of Khorne
GH: Gorebull of Khorne
Units: Skullreapers, Wrathmongers, Khorngors, Slaughterbrute, Chaos Siege Giant (also available to Chorfs)
The Empire:
LL: Emil Valgeir
LH: Kurt Helborg (an odd choice for an Ulric pack I know, but couldn't think of anyone else suitable)
GL: Grand Master
GH: Warrior Priest of Ulric
Units: Warriors of Ulric (Mid-range infantry with shield and dual weapon variants), Knights of the White Wolf, Knights Panther, Teutogen Guard, Celestial Hurricanum
FLC: Fucking Toddy, but hopefully also U'zhull Skulltaker since Toddy is already voiced and in the game.
3) THE ??? & THE SERPENT (Kislev vs Slaanesh)
Kislev:
Obviously trying to put anything here would be pure speculation, since we don't know what characters or units nu-Kislev has left. However, I would hope that as opposed to their last LP being themed around monsters and hags of the frontier, this would expand more on the orthodoxy and the more civilised side of the roster. So I'm hoping for some kind of holy warriors units, more artillery, maybe the LL would be some kind of champion of the Great orthodoxy and be best buds with Kostaltyn.
Slaanesh:
LL: Dechala the Denied
LH: Strykaar the Magnificent
GL: Chaos Sorceror Lord of Slaanesh
GH: Exalted Hero of Slaanesh
Units: Slaangors, Pleasureseekers, Boobysnake Knights, Devoted of Slaanesh (Slaanesh-themed Witch elves), Chimera (also available to WoC)
FLC LL: The Masque of Slaanesh
4) THE DOGS OF WAR
Campaign pack for the DoW. Borgio the Beseiger and Lucrezzia Belladonna and Lorzenzo Lupo ar emy safe bets for LLs, not sure who would be the LH.
Roster would be a mix of mercenaries, pikemen, halflings, generic versions of RoRs like birdmen, galloper guns and pavise crossbowmen, some oddballs from around the world like amazons, araby horsemen and halflings, and of course some monsters like ogres and giants. Not sure what their centerpiece units would be, but I could see the Bonegrinder giant joining their ranks.
Would add a new mechanic for all races that allows them to recruit certain DoW units as mercenaries.
FLC LL: Sayl the Faithless for Norsca, and also maybe they finally get a rework on the side?
5) THE DRAGON & THE RAT (Cathay vs Skaven) (honestly a weird pairing I know, but I wanted to get the final dragon sibling and Thanquol in there somewhere)
Cathay:
LL would be Yin-Yin. again I would only be able to speculate what else would come with her, but I'm hope for some kind of Cathayan naval troops armed with swords and pistols, maybe a new type of sky ship and some kind of sea monster like a turtle dragon.
Skaven:
LL: Thanquol & Boneripper (Based on their End Times design)
LH: Skweel Gnawtooth
GL: Exalted Verminlord
GH: Master Moulder
Units: Stormvermin (maybe 2-3 variants, like a melee variant, a warpfire variant, and a rattling gun variant), Verminlord, Giant Rats, Rat Swarms (and maybe finally add the Great Pox Rat and/or War Litter mounts)
FLC LL: Egrimm van Horstmann for Tzeentch
6) THE LICH & THE PLAGUE (Vampire Counts vs Nurgle) (Nurgle, the cheeky bastards, get a second LP)
Vampire Counts:
LL: Nagash (Can summon Tomb Kings and possibly Vampirate units into his armies, and maybe can somehow confederate Arkhan and Luthor)
LH: Walach Harkon
GL: Wight Lord
GH: Lahmian handmaiden
Units: Morghasts Archai, Morghast Harbingers, Spirit hosts, Coven throne as a SEM chariot & mount, Incarnate Elemental of Death as a centerpiece unit, Dread Abyssal mount for certain characters
Nurgle:
LL: The Glottkin
LH: Valnir the Reaper (plus the three Maggoth riders unique to the Glottkin)
GL: Beast Lord of Nurgle
GH: Bray Shaman of Nurgle
Units: Putrid Blightkings, Spined Chaos Beast, feral Maggoth, Plague Cart from Mordheim that provides a Mortis Engine effect, marked Ungor Raiders of Nurgle to give the Poxfather some (shitty) ranged ability.
FLC LL: Neferata, who like Nagash has the ability to summon a selection of Tomb King units into her armies.
submitted by IntelligentBerry7363 to totalwar [link] [comments]
Cathay:
LL: The Monkey King
LH: A warrior monk special character
GL: Some king of monkey man chieftain, a monstrous infantry sized brawler
GH: A celestial dragon monk hero
Units: Celestial dragon monks (possible variants with and without guandaos), Monkey warriors (monstrous infantry), tiger-men (quasi-monstrous cavalry similar to skinwolves), some new monster like a kirin or jade temple dogs.
Ogres:
LL: Golgfag Maneater
LH: Bragg the Gutsman
GL: Some kind of Maneater Lord
GH: Ogre Bruiser
Units: Yhetees, Thundertusks, a new variant or two of Maneaters, Gnoblar manbiters or pigback riders
FLC LL: Li Dao
Khorne:
LL: Arbaal the Undefeated
LH: Kharnak
GL: Doombull of Khorne
GH: Gorebull of Khorne
Units: Skullreapers, Wrathmongers, Khorngors, Slaughterbrute, Chaos Siege Giant (also available to Chorfs)
The Empire:
LL: Emil Valgeir
LH: Kurt Helborg (an odd choice for an Ulric pack I know, but couldn't think of anyone else suitable)
GL: Grand Master
GH: Warrior Priest of Ulric
Units: Warriors of Ulric (Mid-range infantry with shield and dual weapon variants), Knights of the White Wolf, Knights Panther, Teutogen Guard, Celestial Hurricanum
FLC: Fucking Toddy, but hopefully also U'zhull Skulltaker since Toddy is already voiced and in the game.
Kislev:
Obviously trying to put anything here would be pure speculation, since we don't know what characters or units nu-Kislev has left. However, I would hope that as opposed to their last LP being themed around monsters and hags of the frontier, this would expand more on the orthodoxy and the more civilised side of the roster. So I'm hoping for some kind of holy warriors units, more artillery, maybe the LL would be some kind of champion of the Great orthodoxy and be best buds with Kostaltyn.
Slaanesh:
LL: Dechala the Denied
LH: Strykaar the Magnificent
GL: Chaos Sorceror Lord of Slaanesh
GH: Exalted Hero of Slaanesh
Units: Slaangors, Pleasureseekers, Boobysnake Knights, Devoted of Slaanesh (Slaanesh-themed Witch elves), Chimera (also available to WoC)
FLC LL: The Masque of Slaanesh
Campaign pack for the DoW. Borgio the Beseiger and Lucrezzia Belladonna and Lorzenzo Lupo ar emy safe bets for LLs, not sure who would be the LH.
Roster would be a mix of mercenaries, pikemen, halflings, generic versions of RoRs like birdmen, galloper guns and pavise crossbowmen, some oddballs from around the world like amazons, araby horsemen and halflings, and of course some monsters like ogres and giants. Not sure what their centerpiece units would be, but I could see the Bonegrinder giant joining their ranks.
Would add a new mechanic for all races that allows them to recruit certain DoW units as mercenaries.
FLC LL: Sayl the Faithless for Norsca, and also maybe they finally get a rework on the side?
Cathay:
LL would be Yin-Yin. again I would only be able to speculate what else would come with her, but I'm hope for some kind of Cathayan naval troops armed with swords and pistols, maybe a new type of sky ship and some kind of sea monster like a turtle dragon.
Skaven:
LL: Thanquol & Boneripper (Based on their End Times design)
LH: Skweel Gnawtooth
GL: Exalted Verminlord
GH: Master Moulder
Units: Stormvermin (maybe 2-3 variants, like a melee variant, a warpfire variant, and a rattling gun variant), Verminlord, Giant Rats, Rat Swarms (and maybe finally add the Great Pox Rat and/or War Litter mounts)
FLC LL: Egrimm van Horstmann for Tzeentch
Vampire Counts:
LL: Nagash (Can summon Tomb Kings and possibly Vampirate units into his armies, and maybe can somehow confederate Arkhan and Luthor)
LH: Walach Harkon
GL: Wight Lord
GH: Lahmian handmaiden
Units: Morghasts Archai, Morghast Harbingers, Spirit hosts, Coven throne as a SEM chariot & mount, Incarnate Elemental of Death as a centerpiece unit, Dread Abyssal mount for certain characters
Nurgle:
LL: The Glottkin
LH: Valnir the Reaper (plus the three Maggoth riders unique to the Glottkin)
GL: Beast Lord of Nurgle
GH: Bray Shaman of Nurgle
Units: Putrid Blightkings, Spined Chaos Beast, feral Maggoth, Plague Cart from Mordheim that provides a Mortis Engine effect, marked Ungor Raiders of Nurgle to give the Poxfather some (shitty) ranged ability.
FLC LL: Neferata, who like Nagash has the ability to summon a selection of Tomb King units into her armies.
2024.05.21 22:27 Effective_Swimming70 Let’s play a game!
Alright so here’s the deal I’m bored so send me your off-season plans and I will grade them! The rules are simple.
To keep it simple: your assets for the summer:
submitted by Effective_Swimming70 to Thunder [link] [comments]
To keep it simple: your assets for the summer:
- You get ONE draft pick. Pick 12
- You get ONE trade.
- 43 mil in cap space that can be used for FAs and resigning okcs players
- ONE or TWO vet minimum signings.
- You also have the options to resign okcs FAs up to 163 mil that leaves approximately 8 mil below the tax of 171.3.
- How effectively did you upgrade the roster,
- How effectively did you use the cap space,
- What is your final team cost? (Is there room to account for okcs impending extensions).
- Team fit and player play style will be taken into account. Okc values character I will do my best to as well.
- Most importantly fa signings and trades must be realistic… (You can’t trade Lindy for AD).
2024.05.21 22:26 PomegranateShot5942 year and a half of severe fatigue
Hi there -
I got mono December 2022, and it completely changed my life My chronic pain was awful but has gotten better but my fatigue is SO debilitating. Im exhausted all the time and sometimes have a hard time even holding my body up. My ferritin has jumped from 14 - 32 over the last year and a half which is great. For the last year and a half, I was convinced I had a plethora of disorders/diseases the top one being cfs.... I've seen lots of doctors most labs and tests are normal besides my ferritin. Iron levels are normal, but ferritin is not. I have a consolation June 11th to see if I'm eligible for an infusion. I'm honestly so scared they will deny me but plan to stress how exhausted i am all of them time and how much this fatigue has taken control of my life. Do any of you have a similar experience or from personal experience think this could all stem from my low ferritin or something greater? and how have iron infusions helped your energy levels?
submitted by PomegranateShot5942 to Anemic [link] [comments]
I got mono December 2022, and it completely changed my life My chronic pain was awful but has gotten better but my fatigue is SO debilitating. Im exhausted all the time and sometimes have a hard time even holding my body up. My ferritin has jumped from 14 - 32 over the last year and a half which is great. For the last year and a half, I was convinced I had a plethora of disorders/diseases the top one being cfs.... I've seen lots of doctors most labs and tests are normal besides my ferritin. Iron levels are normal, but ferritin is not. I have a consolation June 11th to see if I'm eligible for an infusion. I'm honestly so scared they will deny me but plan to stress how exhausted i am all of them time and how much this fatigue has taken control of my life. Do any of you have a similar experience or from personal experience think this could all stem from my low ferritin or something greater? and how have iron infusions helped your energy levels?
2024.05.21 22:26 goodlittlegirl99 Potential diagnosis
Hi. I was told today by a psychiatrist that in his opinion I have PTSD. There’s obviously a bit more to the process than that but that’s his opinion. The treatment plan in theory is going to be therapy and potentially a mood stabiliser (quetiapine or seroquel depending on your country, I’d really like thoughts on this as he said there are other options if I want but not sure what)
I’d really like to know if there’s any advice anyone can give me. Whether it’s coping, things to ask for in treatment, how the diagnosis impacts you etc.
Context: I’m in the UK and I was initially told I might have BPD
submitted by goodlittlegirl99 to ptsd [link] [comments]
I’d really like to know if there’s any advice anyone can give me. Whether it’s coping, things to ask for in treatment, how the diagnosis impacts you etc.
Context: I’m in the UK and I was initially told I might have BPD
2024.05.21 22:24 Worth-Mycologist-659 How to make sense of negative reactions to a good reading?
 | I use playing cards instead of tarot, however I'm drawing the cards for psychological/understanding myself purposes instead of fortune telling, so I think this subreddit is a good place to ask. I'm not specifically looking for help interpreting! (But would be nice if anyone here does playing cards reading as well.) I just want help in making sense of my own reactions to what I see in the cards. submitted by Worth-Mycologist-659 to SecularTarot [link] [comments] Following the textbook definition of the system I'm learning from, the cards I pulled are very nice, very lucky. "Red cards are good and black cards are bad" and I got 7 reds and 2 blacks (and the blacks are clubs ["needing effort" kind of bad] instead of spades ["trouble coming my way" kind of bad]). However, despite this very good fortune, my reaction to this is very... meh, uninterested, with hints of "I don't like this". I'm very confused. Do I not like getting good things or something? The interpretation I came to mostly reminded me to make plans or search for goals in life, which I kinda have to do anyway because I do nothing atm. But I for some reason really hate how it's all leading towards a pleasant life, well-being, safety. For example: "A good mood is a good condition for planning, it'll lead to well-being and financial safety." As if I'm perhaps not interested in having a good life? Well perhaps? Maybe the needing effort part makes me uninterested, maybe I wish to have the fortune handed over to me? I'm still a few months into doing this so I'm still not good at my psychological purposes goal, but really, isn't noticing this something already? Maybe there is something weird in my mind that makes me reject good fortune. https://preview.redd.it/pjcxps2w9u1d1.jpg?width=3072&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b310bab188b05050d6aeff2105c5f9bfe65dd0be |
2024.05.21 22:23 JollyBrick5136 Guilt about leaving my mom
Hi everyone,
I 27(F) have come back to live with my mother after a year abroad and it's been a year now. Now, I have the option to leave again but the guilt I feel about leaving her seems insurmountable. Plus, I get no emotional support at all from my family (mother and brother) on this life decision that they see as erratic. I would be leaving to look for a job over there so I can totally understand that my plan lack a bit of structure and can look worrying to her. However, this is the best option for me since there is career option for my field of studies in my home country and I'm just so intensely miserable here!
My mother and I have had a very complicated relationship basically my whole life. As a child, she and my brother used to sort of put me apart and they have always been very close. My brother tells her everything about him while I barely share anything because she always ends up judging me and not being supportive. Plus I'm queer which she doesn't accept and expects me to erase my identity and it's quite hard being openly gay im my country. If there are queer people in a movie she will make sure to show her disgust which is plain hurtful.
I've suffered from depression at least since I was 13 and never got any support from anyone at home. Since I'm a child, if I cry, they both take it personally and get angry at me. I was only diagnosed at around 19 and it has been a tough road to take without their support. I felt almost instantly better when I left to go abroad and coming back has been a soul-crushing experience.
My mother has also supported me financially, took us on holidays and even payed for an expensive university for me (which my brother, who is 4 years older than me, resents me for). Even since I'm back she doesn't ask money from me for the house. If I pay for groceries most of time she will send the money back to me which I honestly hate. Cause I feel this then gives her a reason to say that she does all those things for me and I am just an ungrateful and mean person. I know she recently told my brother that I sort of make ger life miserable cause I'm always in a bad mood.
This is where my guilt stems from but also from the fact that I'm so moody when around her. She gets on my nerves and my body is always tensed when I'm here. I just get so so sad seeing how she'll give a free pass to my brother but she always gets angry at me. I quit a job last year to be able to do an (online) internship at an international organisation, which is super hard to get and will be great for my CV since my field is so competitive. After I told her about my decision, she silent treated me for three weeks which is a tactic she has used on me since I was a child and it works! I was so excited about this internship but with how she reacted I've just beed demotivated and depressed and ofc if she sees me crying she gets angry. Which is why I'm moody honestly cause I can't never communicate my feelings and expect support or understanding so I just shut down. And it's extra hard since on the other hand she expects me to support her emotionally. When she is sick, she takes this little voice and just expects me to clean, cook and everything. But I can't do all of this. I already clean most of the house on my own while she barely does anything to be honest. And I cook for myself. I cooked for her when she was sick and she kept complaining the food made her feel bad so I mostly let her cook for herself now, plus with my internship and being depressed I just don't have the energy to do all of this. However depressed I am, she will never take care of me. If I get a fever she gets upset at me and thinks I'm pretending.
I'm so exhausted. My Saturdays consists just of that: cleaning. If I go out with friends she will often get upset cause she is staying home. When I ask her is she wants to go to an event or the cinema she says she doesn't want to or she will see then never gets back to me. I can't keep pushing. Even when we go out, we barely have anything to say to each other. I try to make conversation by asking about her work and colleagues and what not but she never asks me anything at all. If I talk about something nice that I did when I was abroad or tell about something sweet a friend did for me or said to me, she doesn't reply just like my brother. So I just shut up most of the time cause it's painful. Sometimes I feel like I might have a mood disorder seeing how my mood is all over the place here. But then I remember my time abroad or time spent with friends and remember I'm actually so calm and stable in these instances.
Now I said clearly this is my plan to leave. They asked a few questions but I feel they are both acting as if it will never happen anyway. And my mother has told me many times to stay here, get a job here, etc. But even if I moved out of her place I feel I would still be miserable in my home country. Firstly, I'll never get the chance to acquire experience in my field plus even if I'm not living with her she will expect me to like come see her, probably clean for her (which I wouldn't mind at all if on the other hand she was not going behind my back talking about how mean I am). And secondly I want to be free to live my life as a queer person. All I really want is to have peace within me. I don't care abiut having big houses and cars and buying new clothes like they do (they both work in finance - we are not rich but middle class and we live well).
When I think of my plan, I just get so overwhelmed just because my family gives no emotional support at all, no advice. Of course, this plan might fail but that's okay, and I would need them to tell me that. I need them to say they understand that leaving is the best option for me and hey it's good to give it a try and if it doesn't work out, well life will. I so badly need them to support me. But all I get is guilt tripping about her health and the fact she has no friends and will be alone. It's so overwhelming that I'm so depressed and come to think that the only solution for me right now would be to be dead honestly. Then I won't have to deal with any sadness or guilt and maybe I'm not meant to do something meaningful of my life anyway. I just need some advice to see if I'm beinh mean or if I deserve to have my life as I want it to be.
submitted by JollyBrick5136 to LifeAdvice [link] [comments]
I 27(F) have come back to live with my mother after a year abroad and it's been a year now. Now, I have the option to leave again but the guilt I feel about leaving her seems insurmountable. Plus, I get no emotional support at all from my family (mother and brother) on this life decision that they see as erratic. I would be leaving to look for a job over there so I can totally understand that my plan lack a bit of structure and can look worrying to her. However, this is the best option for me since there is career option for my field of studies in my home country and I'm just so intensely miserable here!
My mother and I have had a very complicated relationship basically my whole life. As a child, she and my brother used to sort of put me apart and they have always been very close. My brother tells her everything about him while I barely share anything because she always ends up judging me and not being supportive. Plus I'm queer which she doesn't accept and expects me to erase my identity and it's quite hard being openly gay im my country. If there are queer people in a movie she will make sure to show her disgust which is plain hurtful.
I've suffered from depression at least since I was 13 and never got any support from anyone at home. Since I'm a child, if I cry, they both take it personally and get angry at me. I was only diagnosed at around 19 and it has been a tough road to take without their support. I felt almost instantly better when I left to go abroad and coming back has been a soul-crushing experience.
My mother has also supported me financially, took us on holidays and even payed for an expensive university for me (which my brother, who is 4 years older than me, resents me for). Even since I'm back she doesn't ask money from me for the house. If I pay for groceries most of time she will send the money back to me which I honestly hate. Cause I feel this then gives her a reason to say that she does all those things for me and I am just an ungrateful and mean person. I know she recently told my brother that I sort of make ger life miserable cause I'm always in a bad mood.
This is where my guilt stems from but also from the fact that I'm so moody when around her. She gets on my nerves and my body is always tensed when I'm here. I just get so so sad seeing how she'll give a free pass to my brother but she always gets angry at me. I quit a job last year to be able to do an (online) internship at an international organisation, which is super hard to get and will be great for my CV since my field is so competitive. After I told her about my decision, she silent treated me for three weeks which is a tactic she has used on me since I was a child and it works! I was so excited about this internship but with how she reacted I've just beed demotivated and depressed and ofc if she sees me crying she gets angry. Which is why I'm moody honestly cause I can't never communicate my feelings and expect support or understanding so I just shut down. And it's extra hard since on the other hand she expects me to support her emotionally. When she is sick, she takes this little voice and just expects me to clean, cook and everything. But I can't do all of this. I already clean most of the house on my own while she barely does anything to be honest. And I cook for myself. I cooked for her when she was sick and she kept complaining the food made her feel bad so I mostly let her cook for herself now, plus with my internship and being depressed I just don't have the energy to do all of this. However depressed I am, she will never take care of me. If I get a fever she gets upset at me and thinks I'm pretending.
I'm so exhausted. My Saturdays consists just of that: cleaning. If I go out with friends she will often get upset cause she is staying home. When I ask her is she wants to go to an event or the cinema she says she doesn't want to or she will see then never gets back to me. I can't keep pushing. Even when we go out, we barely have anything to say to each other. I try to make conversation by asking about her work and colleagues and what not but she never asks me anything at all. If I talk about something nice that I did when I was abroad or tell about something sweet a friend did for me or said to me, she doesn't reply just like my brother. So I just shut up most of the time cause it's painful. Sometimes I feel like I might have a mood disorder seeing how my mood is all over the place here. But then I remember my time abroad or time spent with friends and remember I'm actually so calm and stable in these instances.
Now I said clearly this is my plan to leave. They asked a few questions but I feel they are both acting as if it will never happen anyway. And my mother has told me many times to stay here, get a job here, etc. But even if I moved out of her place I feel I would still be miserable in my home country. Firstly, I'll never get the chance to acquire experience in my field plus even if I'm not living with her she will expect me to like come see her, probably clean for her (which I wouldn't mind at all if on the other hand she was not going behind my back talking about how mean I am). And secondly I want to be free to live my life as a queer person. All I really want is to have peace within me. I don't care abiut having big houses and cars and buying new clothes like they do (they both work in finance - we are not rich but middle class and we live well).
When I think of my plan, I just get so overwhelmed just because my family gives no emotional support at all, no advice. Of course, this plan might fail but that's okay, and I would need them to tell me that. I need them to say they understand that leaving is the best option for me and hey it's good to give it a try and if it doesn't work out, well life will. I so badly need them to support me. But all I get is guilt tripping about her health and the fact she has no friends and will be alone. It's so overwhelming that I'm so depressed and come to think that the only solution for me right now would be to be dead honestly. Then I won't have to deal with any sadness or guilt and maybe I'm not meant to do something meaningful of my life anyway. I just need some advice to see if I'm beinh mean or if I deserve to have my life as I want it to be.
2024.05.21 22:20 Ancient-Support8050 I finally have some answers…(Bipolar, ADD etc.)
After years of struggling, even more so in the last couple of weeks, I have finally have some answers.
To rewind, I started Zoloft a couple months ago and have seen tremendous benefits from the medication. Initially starting with 50mg, I was soon brought up to 75mg a month later to which I saw great benefit.
Benefits aside, I quickly began experiencing a rollercoaster of emotions. I was warned by this community that something in my behaviour was odd. So after some contemplating, I sought help at the ER. Initially I didn't get the help I needed, and was discharged after waiting for hours and speaking to a doctor. Two days later I once again found myself at the ER, this time extremely suicidal and with a lack of will to live. I was going to take my life.
After feeling like I had lost it all I decided to cling for help, show one last cry of desperation. And so, I had taken an Uber to the ER and told them everything. I said I was suicidal, said how I wanted to end my life and was completely content with doing so. I wasn't put on a hold, but instead they booked me an appointment with the Mental Health crisis team a few days later (little did I know this would change everything). Although I didn't have much hope, the days went by, I pulled through and spoke to the lady over phone, and after telling her everything (with her kindly listening and making me feel heard) I was referred to a Psychiatrist.
That brings me to today, I just spoke to the Psychiatrist and we had a long and meaningful discussion. I told him everything I thought was concerning, everything that came to mind. I mentioned all of my thoughts and concerns, ideas as to what I was dealing with, and the questions I had with his consensus.
Pretty much, he said I had traits of both ADD and Bipolar Disorder. He said, because I'm young, the feelings I'm experiencing are normal, however, the grandiose ways in which my feelings manifest are not. I didn't get a formal diagnose, however, I was told that I'm at an increased risk of developing Bipolar and Manic episodes in the future. Not only that, but he said I have likely experienced a hypomanic episode already. Although I didn't get an official diagnosis I'm still content with the answers I did receive. He is going to put me on a low dose of mood stabilizers to act as a proactive measure, and with some coping mechanisms hopefully I will be set on the right track.
I want to thank everyone for the concern and support you have provided over the last month. This likely wouldn't have happened without this community. I know I was acting a little rash to some of you who were giving advice and for that I apologize. I think we can safely say I was likely experiencing a manic episode. I'm still going to stay on Zoloft (which I'm happy about) and I will be adding the Mood stabilizer in combination with that. Thanks again for the help!
Feel free to ask any questions, vent, express concerns or say whatever else you so desire. If you want someone to talk to, shoot me a PM. There's hope my friends. Reality might be bullshit but at least there is hope. 😊
submitted by Ancient-Support8050 to zoloft [link] [comments]
To rewind, I started Zoloft a couple months ago and have seen tremendous benefits from the medication. Initially starting with 50mg, I was soon brought up to 75mg a month later to which I saw great benefit.
Benefits aside, I quickly began experiencing a rollercoaster of emotions. I was warned by this community that something in my behaviour was odd. So after some contemplating, I sought help at the ER. Initially I didn't get the help I needed, and was discharged after waiting for hours and speaking to a doctor. Two days later I once again found myself at the ER, this time extremely suicidal and with a lack of will to live. I was going to take my life.
After feeling like I had lost it all I decided to cling for help, show one last cry of desperation. And so, I had taken an Uber to the ER and told them everything. I said I was suicidal, said how I wanted to end my life and was completely content with doing so. I wasn't put on a hold, but instead they booked me an appointment with the Mental Health crisis team a few days later (little did I know this would change everything). Although I didn't have much hope, the days went by, I pulled through and spoke to the lady over phone, and after telling her everything (with her kindly listening and making me feel heard) I was referred to a Psychiatrist.
That brings me to today, I just spoke to the Psychiatrist and we had a long and meaningful discussion. I told him everything I thought was concerning, everything that came to mind. I mentioned all of my thoughts and concerns, ideas as to what I was dealing with, and the questions I had with his consensus.
Pretty much, he said I had traits of both ADD and Bipolar Disorder. He said, because I'm young, the feelings I'm experiencing are normal, however, the grandiose ways in which my feelings manifest are not. I didn't get a formal diagnose, however, I was told that I'm at an increased risk of developing Bipolar and Manic episodes in the future. Not only that, but he said I have likely experienced a hypomanic episode already. Although I didn't get an official diagnosis I'm still content with the answers I did receive. He is going to put me on a low dose of mood stabilizers to act as a proactive measure, and with some coping mechanisms hopefully I will be set on the right track.
I want to thank everyone for the concern and support you have provided over the last month. This likely wouldn't have happened without this community. I know I was acting a little rash to some of you who were giving advice and for that I apologize. I think we can safely say I was likely experiencing a manic episode. I'm still going to stay on Zoloft (which I'm happy about) and I will be adding the Mood stabilizer in combination with that. Thanks again for the help!
Feel free to ask any questions, vent, express concerns or say whatever else you so desire. If you want someone to talk to, shoot me a PM. There's hope my friends. Reality might be bullshit but at least there is hope. 😊
2024.05.21 22:20 TheStatsProff Cheap Turnitin AI checker
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submitted by TheStatsProff to TurnitinAI_detector [link] [comments]
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Hey and hi! I previously posted these Character Chats in order to fill the void when the comic was on involuntary hiatus, and I'm pleased to hear that it was received positively and people were asking for more. I couldn't really commit to it once the hiatus was over, since I've got a job and all. But good news, my whole team got laid off! I've got a lot more time on my hands now, so I think I'll keep this series going for a few weeks on Tuesdays and Thursdays or so. If anyone complains about me surfing reddit at work during my notice period... well, what are they gonna do, fire me?
Today my giant novely ouija board has selected Prince Aaronev Tarvek Sturmvoraus. Our first Spark, and first main character, but somehow our third Valois out of five picks.
Tarvek is a member of the large and complicated Valois family tree, descended from our pal Andronicus Valois, the Storm King. He is the son of Prince Aaronev Sturmvoraus VI of Sturmhalten and an unknown mother, and the older brother of Anevka Sturmvoraus. He and Anevka share the same grandmother with the von Bliztengaard siblings and Violetta, making them all cousins. The Selnikovs may also be close family members, as their main residence is in Sturmhalten. Tarvek also calls Zulenna a cousin at one point.
The Storm King conspiracy among the Fifty Families was said to be fizzling out in the time before the comic, but the Mongfish family (i.e. Lucrezia) got involved and whipped them all into shape. Besides making most of the Knights of Jove Lucrezia loyalists, part of this involvment was ensuring there was a suitable male heir to the Storm King using Spark sceince, which ended up producing, at minimum, Tarvek and Martellus von Blitzengaard. The degree to which Tarvek's mother was involved and consenting is unknown. While we don't know how much was done, Tarvek is a powerful Spark, physically fit, and quite intelligent, so mission accomplished I suppose (though Tarvek does wear these tiny pince-nez around, so he may have poor vision - nice going, Lucrezia).
We don't have a family tree or anything, so we need to take the story's word that Tarvek's claim for being a direct heir of Andronicus is one of the most direct, if not the strongest overall. Two of the strongest claimants, Tarvek and Martellus, share a grandmother, so presumably their legitimacy is either through her or her late husband. Grandmama is once referred to with the title "Dowager Princess of Sturmhalten", it's possible Aaronev inherited his title as Prince of Sturmhalten by being her son. On the other hand, Tarvek also says that his descent comes down through his mother, so maybe she's Grandmama's child instead? Or it's wrong to trace back things to this set of grandparents after all? The family tree is thrown for another loop when Orotine declares Martellus a third-place heir rather than the commonly assumed second-place, so now who's in second place and how's that guy related to Tarvek's family tree, and... it's at this point I throw up my hands in exasperation.
Tarvek spent some of his early childhood as a political hostage on Castle Wulfenbach, being raised with other hostages by von Pinn. Tarvek recalls this time fondly, and in particular became good friends with Gil, whose identity was still hidden. When the two of them were hunting for secrets, hoping to discover Gil's lineage, they discover a red-herring left by the Baron. While Tarvek didn't buy it and tried to dig further, he got caught. Along with some snitching from Gil, this got him expelled from the Castle. Of course, everyone was spying abord the Castle, and Tarvek was just the only one kicked out. My assumption is that the Baron wasn't worried about Gil's identity being exposed, but didn't approve of Gil getting close with Tarvek for one reason or another and arranged to destroy the friendship.
He spent his remaining childhood in Sturmhalten, where he was wrapped up in family scheming, including Aaronev's schemes with the Other. Besides Aaronev, he also spent time with Anevka and Violetta during this period, and received some Smoke Knight training. He later goes to Paris for his higher education, where he was a good student and made friendships with influential young people like Colette and Neena. He was also involuntarily dragged into Gil's college adventures, where he became, uh, "acquainted" with disreputable characters like Bangladesh Dupree and Zola. He's called back to Sturmhalten after completing his education.
As a young adult, Tarvek's goals are initially to learn all he can from the Other conspiracy in Sturmhalten, destroy them afterwards, use this knowledge to overthrow the Baron, become Storm King, get the Fifty Families under control, and bring peace and prosperity to his new empire. However, Aaronev is in charge in Sturmhalten, and has different ideas. Tarvek detests his father and the Other conspiracy he's involved with, but cooperates with them to stay in their good graces and learn all he can. Tarvek attempts to act as a moderating influence on Aaronev, but Aaronev is too far gone to pull back. Aaronev ends up capturing nearly all the young female Sparks in Europa beneath the Baron's nose, and destroys them utterly trying to implant copies of Lucrezia into their minds, while Tarvek doesn't do much more than watch.
Aaronev eventually subjects his daughter Anevka to the treatment, nearly killing her. The Circus of Adventure happens to be in town, and as an expert on the Muses, Tarvek recognizes Tinka as a van Rijn original when she performs. Tarvek has his men abduct Tinka, and uses her as the basis for building a masterpiece clank which would connect to Anevka's mind and allow her to move and speak while her body was comatose. For what it's worth, he does try to pay the Circus after the fact, but they naturally ran like hell out of town. Tinka is eventually damaged beyond his ability to repair by Aaronev.
After this, he also conspires (or pretends to conspire) with Anevka to use her clank body's voice box to imitate Lucrezia's ability to command revenants, and use that ability to overthrow Aaronev and the Baron. When the Circus comes back to town with Agatha in tow, she's found out as Lucrezia's daughter at a show, with more beans being spilled later when Agatha's drugged with a truth serum. Aaronev tries to throw her in the Lucrezia-machine, but Anevka launches her coup right then, and finalizes her voice box by studying Agatha's own voice. Tarvek, having fallen for Agatha basically immediately, attempts to smuggle Agatha out of town under Anevka's nose, but the Geisters eventually get Lucrezia in her head anyway.
Tarvek, at this point, wants to integrate Agatha into his plan to use Other technology to usurp the Baron, which means keeping her safely at his side. This means both cooperating with Lucrezia to learn from her to begin with and protect Agatha's body, and also sabotaging Agatha's efforts at surrendering herself to the Baron for the greater good. One his deals with Lucrezia is making a clank head imprinted with a Lucrezia copy, designed to fit onto Avenka's clank body. Tarvek lures in Anevka for Lucrezia, and after some back-and-forth betrayals, eventually deactivates Anevka's head and puts her in storage, essentially killing her for the time being. Juggling Agatha, Lucrezia, and now a second Lucrezia proves too much for Tarvek once the Baron's troops arrive in Sturmhalten, and he ends up slashed in the gut, shot, and abandoned in the ensuing chaos.
Tarvek ends up in the Great Hospital in Mechanicsburg, as one of many of the injured from Sturmhalten. Violetta, who had been assigned to Mechanicsburg by Tarvek to keep her out of the proverbial firing line, manages to get him out of custody in the hospital... but inside of Castle Heterodyne instead, which is something of a lateral move. After connecting up with Agatha, Taevek comes down with Hogfarb's Respelendent Immolation, either due to traipsing about Castle Heterodyne of all places while wounded, or, Tarvek speculates, as a poisoning attempt from his own extended family. Gil is recruited to help with curing him, and after extensive bickering, infections, distractions, complications, and one apotheosis, he's back in good health. Tarvek attempts to help fix the Castle, and aid Agatha however he can, including fighting with Lucrezia and Vole, and attempting to strangle Zola. His bickering with Gil during this time mostly puts him on the defensive and has Tarvek trying to justify his actions, but he eventually does has a quiet epiphany.
He eventually gets grabbed by Other in a case of mistaken identity, and his quick analytical skills wind up placing him in charge of the Wulfenbach fleet's grand strategy temporarily - it's at gunpoint, but Boris assesses that he's really doing what's in the best interest of the Empire. He has to scurry off when Klaus comes onto the scene, placing him in a perfect position to recruit the Empire's Vespiary Squad and their weasels when Klaus turns on them. Notably, he risks life and limb rescuing a squad member, who he needs of course, but also Jorgi, who mostly annoys him. He sends the Vespiary Squad to hiding places abroad. As the battle for Mechanicsburg wraps up, Tarvek ends up stabbed with a poisoned dagger by Martellus just before the time-stop.
Post time-skip, Gil dedicates extensive resources towards getting Tarvek out of the time stop. Tarvek isn't able to do much before being kidnapped by the Immortal Library, and then kidnapped by Mister Obsidian on behalf of Grandmama. He does manage to breathe a bit in Paris, before being kidnapped by Mister Obsidian again on behalf of Seffie, to be sent to England. But en route aboard a pirate vessel, he's (shockingly) interrupted by a kidnapping attempt, this time for Grandmama again. Martellus sent assassins after Tarvek to interrupt the interruption, leading to bloody battle between Seffie's pirates, Grandmama's Smoke Knights, Martellus' Knights of the Hunt, and poor Tarvek. After being rescued by Gil, Tarvek flips the script, and he and Bang kidnap Gil instead, changing course to England.
In England, he can finally, you know, not get kidnapped for a bit. He decides to join Agatha in the Royal Society, and despite nearly getting strangled by Higgs, manages to reach Agatha and help work on curing her of Lucrezia, and curing Gil of Klaus. After interminable delays like a undersea cult, briefly seeing beyond time, punching Tweedle, and a revenant attack, they eventually pull it all off.
Later, in the war against the Polar Lords, Tarvek is essentially given the role of Gil's official treacherous vizier. On paper, helping the Empire helps keep him safe to further his own ambitions, but in practice, Tarvek seems more focused on doing good by his friends than anything to do with becoming Storm King.
Whew! And that's the short synopsis!
As a Spark, Tarvek's specialty is masterwork clanks in the van Rijn mold. His Anevka clank maintains full sentience even after any organic parts it was attached to died off, and continues to be used by Lucrezia to devastating effect. He also has a knack for rapid analysis, such as being able to understand the Wulfenbach fleet's strategy with just a glance. It's possible his political aptitude, scheming skills and ability to anticipate people's actions are a byproduct of his spark, but it may also just be the natural result of his upbringing. He is unusually composed for a Spark, and is very rarely seen in the Madness Place, and never for very long.
Beyond the Spark and his cunning, Tarvek also received some Smoke Knight training, making him skilled in martial arts and sleight of hand. That said, he'd prefer not to get in fights, and his first resort use his Spark or guile to get out safely (his second resort is just shooting them, with a gun). He also has a passion for fashion design, particularly lady's fashion.
Besides his conquer-Europa ambitions, Tarvek seems primarily driven to help and protect the people he loves, but his preferred tactics for doing so are often underhanded, or screw over people that he doesn't particularly love. Tarvek is the kind of guy who has to come to the conclusion that mind-control slavery is bad in general, rather than bad for people I know. He does come to that conclusion on his own, so kudos for that, but for a lot of people it's not even something you have to think about. Tarvek is also quick to use "they'd kill me if I tried, I had no choice" as a defense, but never quite understands that there was always a choice available he didn't consider - die trying. That all said, Tarvek is in generally improving his character over time, and wants to do the right thing, both in the "greater good" sense and doing right by other people individually, and finds himself frustrated at himself that he's often failed. I don't want to discuss Tarvek's ethics too much further here, since there's a great deal to talk about and this is supposed to be a discussion thread! Why do I have to do all the work?
Major Relationships:
submitted by Fermule to girlgenius [link] [comments]
Today my giant novely ouija board has selected Prince Aaronev Tarvek Sturmvoraus. Our first Spark, and first main character, but somehow our third Valois out of five picks.
Tarvek is a member of the large and complicated Valois family tree, descended from our pal Andronicus Valois, the Storm King. He is the son of Prince Aaronev Sturmvoraus VI of Sturmhalten and an unknown mother, and the older brother of Anevka Sturmvoraus. He and Anevka share the same grandmother with the von Bliztengaard siblings and Violetta, making them all cousins. The Selnikovs may also be close family members, as their main residence is in Sturmhalten. Tarvek also calls Zulenna a cousin at one point.
The Storm King conspiracy among the Fifty Families was said to be fizzling out in the time before the comic, but the Mongfish family (i.e. Lucrezia) got involved and whipped them all into shape. Besides making most of the Knights of Jove Lucrezia loyalists, part of this involvment was ensuring there was a suitable male heir to the Storm King using Spark sceince, which ended up producing, at minimum, Tarvek and Martellus von Blitzengaard. The degree to which Tarvek's mother was involved and consenting is unknown. While we don't know how much was done, Tarvek is a powerful Spark, physically fit, and quite intelligent, so mission accomplished I suppose (though Tarvek does wear these tiny pince-nez around, so he may have poor vision - nice going, Lucrezia).
We don't have a family tree or anything, so we need to take the story's word that Tarvek's claim for being a direct heir of Andronicus is one of the most direct, if not the strongest overall. Two of the strongest claimants, Tarvek and Martellus, share a grandmother, so presumably their legitimacy is either through her or her late husband. Grandmama is once referred to with the title "Dowager Princess of Sturmhalten", it's possible Aaronev inherited his title as Prince of Sturmhalten by being her son. On the other hand, Tarvek also says that his descent comes down through his mother, so maybe she's Grandmama's child instead? Or it's wrong to trace back things to this set of grandparents after all? The family tree is thrown for another loop when Orotine declares Martellus a third-place heir rather than the commonly assumed second-place, so now who's in second place and how's that guy related to Tarvek's family tree, and... it's at this point I throw up my hands in exasperation.
Tarvek spent some of his early childhood as a political hostage on Castle Wulfenbach, being raised with other hostages by von Pinn. Tarvek recalls this time fondly, and in particular became good friends with Gil, whose identity was still hidden. When the two of them were hunting for secrets, hoping to discover Gil's lineage, they discover a red-herring left by the Baron. While Tarvek didn't buy it and tried to dig further, he got caught. Along with some snitching from Gil, this got him expelled from the Castle. Of course, everyone was spying abord the Castle, and Tarvek was just the only one kicked out. My assumption is that the Baron wasn't worried about Gil's identity being exposed, but didn't approve of Gil getting close with Tarvek for one reason or another and arranged to destroy the friendship.
He spent his remaining childhood in Sturmhalten, where he was wrapped up in family scheming, including Aaronev's schemes with the Other. Besides Aaronev, he also spent time with Anevka and Violetta during this period, and received some Smoke Knight training. He later goes to Paris for his higher education, where he was a good student and made friendships with influential young people like Colette and Neena. He was also involuntarily dragged into Gil's college adventures, where he became, uh, "acquainted" with disreputable characters like Bangladesh Dupree and Zola. He's called back to Sturmhalten after completing his education.
As a young adult, Tarvek's goals are initially to learn all he can from the Other conspiracy in Sturmhalten, destroy them afterwards, use this knowledge to overthrow the Baron, become Storm King, get the Fifty Families under control, and bring peace and prosperity to his new empire. However, Aaronev is in charge in Sturmhalten, and has different ideas. Tarvek detests his father and the Other conspiracy he's involved with, but cooperates with them to stay in their good graces and learn all he can. Tarvek attempts to act as a moderating influence on Aaronev, but Aaronev is too far gone to pull back. Aaronev ends up capturing nearly all the young female Sparks in Europa beneath the Baron's nose, and destroys them utterly trying to implant copies of Lucrezia into their minds, while Tarvek doesn't do much more than watch.
Aaronev eventually subjects his daughter Anevka to the treatment, nearly killing her. The Circus of Adventure happens to be in town, and as an expert on the Muses, Tarvek recognizes Tinka as a van Rijn original when she performs. Tarvek has his men abduct Tinka, and uses her as the basis for building a masterpiece clank which would connect to Anevka's mind and allow her to move and speak while her body was comatose. For what it's worth, he does try to pay the Circus after the fact, but they naturally ran like hell out of town. Tinka is eventually damaged beyond his ability to repair by Aaronev.
After this, he also conspires (or pretends to conspire) with Anevka to use her clank body's voice box to imitate Lucrezia's ability to command revenants, and use that ability to overthrow Aaronev and the Baron. When the Circus comes back to town with Agatha in tow, she's found out as Lucrezia's daughter at a show, with more beans being spilled later when Agatha's drugged with a truth serum. Aaronev tries to throw her in the Lucrezia-machine, but Anevka launches her coup right then, and finalizes her voice box by studying Agatha's own voice. Tarvek, having fallen for Agatha basically immediately, attempts to smuggle Agatha out of town under Anevka's nose, but the Geisters eventually get Lucrezia in her head anyway.
Tarvek, at this point, wants to integrate Agatha into his plan to use Other technology to usurp the Baron, which means keeping her safely at his side. This means both cooperating with Lucrezia to learn from her to begin with and protect Agatha's body, and also sabotaging Agatha's efforts at surrendering herself to the Baron for the greater good. One his deals with Lucrezia is making a clank head imprinted with a Lucrezia copy, designed to fit onto Avenka's clank body. Tarvek lures in Anevka for Lucrezia, and after some back-and-forth betrayals, eventually deactivates Anevka's head and puts her in storage, essentially killing her for the time being. Juggling Agatha, Lucrezia, and now a second Lucrezia proves too much for Tarvek once the Baron's troops arrive in Sturmhalten, and he ends up slashed in the gut, shot, and abandoned in the ensuing chaos.
Tarvek ends up in the Great Hospital in Mechanicsburg, as one of many of the injured from Sturmhalten. Violetta, who had been assigned to Mechanicsburg by Tarvek to keep her out of the proverbial firing line, manages to get him out of custody in the hospital... but inside of Castle Heterodyne instead, which is something of a lateral move. After connecting up with Agatha, Taevek comes down with Hogfarb's Respelendent Immolation, either due to traipsing about Castle Heterodyne of all places while wounded, or, Tarvek speculates, as a poisoning attempt from his own extended family. Gil is recruited to help with curing him, and after extensive bickering, infections, distractions, complications, and one apotheosis, he's back in good health. Tarvek attempts to help fix the Castle, and aid Agatha however he can, including fighting with Lucrezia and Vole, and attempting to strangle Zola. His bickering with Gil during this time mostly puts him on the defensive and has Tarvek trying to justify his actions, but he eventually does has a quiet epiphany.
He eventually gets grabbed by Other in a case of mistaken identity, and his quick analytical skills wind up placing him in charge of the Wulfenbach fleet's grand strategy temporarily - it's at gunpoint, but Boris assesses that he's really doing what's in the best interest of the Empire. He has to scurry off when Klaus comes onto the scene, placing him in a perfect position to recruit the Empire's Vespiary Squad and their weasels when Klaus turns on them. Notably, he risks life and limb rescuing a squad member, who he needs of course, but also Jorgi, who mostly annoys him. He sends the Vespiary Squad to hiding places abroad. As the battle for Mechanicsburg wraps up, Tarvek ends up stabbed with a poisoned dagger by Martellus just before the time-stop.
Post time-skip, Gil dedicates extensive resources towards getting Tarvek out of the time stop. Tarvek isn't able to do much before being kidnapped by the Immortal Library, and then kidnapped by Mister Obsidian on behalf of Grandmama. He does manage to breathe a bit in Paris, before being kidnapped by Mister Obsidian again on behalf of Seffie, to be sent to England. But en route aboard a pirate vessel, he's (shockingly) interrupted by a kidnapping attempt, this time for Grandmama again. Martellus sent assassins after Tarvek to interrupt the interruption, leading to bloody battle between Seffie's pirates, Grandmama's Smoke Knights, Martellus' Knights of the Hunt, and poor Tarvek. After being rescued by Gil, Tarvek flips the script, and he and Bang kidnap Gil instead, changing course to England.
In England, he can finally, you know, not get kidnapped for a bit. He decides to join Agatha in the Royal Society, and despite nearly getting strangled by Higgs, manages to reach Agatha and help work on curing her of Lucrezia, and curing Gil of Klaus. After interminable delays like a undersea cult, briefly seeing beyond time, punching Tweedle, and a revenant attack, they eventually pull it all off.
Later, in the war against the Polar Lords, Tarvek is essentially given the role of Gil's official treacherous vizier. On paper, helping the Empire helps keep him safe to further his own ambitions, but in practice, Tarvek seems more focused on doing good by his friends than anything to do with becoming Storm King.
Whew! And that's the short synopsis!
As a Spark, Tarvek's specialty is masterwork clanks in the van Rijn mold. His Anevka clank maintains full sentience even after any organic parts it was attached to died off, and continues to be used by Lucrezia to devastating effect. He also has a knack for rapid analysis, such as being able to understand the Wulfenbach fleet's strategy with just a glance. It's possible his political aptitude, scheming skills and ability to anticipate people's actions are a byproduct of his spark, but it may also just be the natural result of his upbringing. He is unusually composed for a Spark, and is very rarely seen in the Madness Place, and never for very long.
Beyond the Spark and his cunning, Tarvek also received some Smoke Knight training, making him skilled in martial arts and sleight of hand. That said, he'd prefer not to get in fights, and his first resort use his Spark or guile to get out safely (his second resort is just shooting them, with a gun). He also has a passion for fashion design, particularly lady's fashion.
Besides his conquer-Europa ambitions, Tarvek seems primarily driven to help and protect the people he loves, but his preferred tactics for doing so are often underhanded, or screw over people that he doesn't particularly love. Tarvek is the kind of guy who has to come to the conclusion that mind-control slavery is bad in general, rather than bad for people I know. He does come to that conclusion on his own, so kudos for that, but for a lot of people it's not even something you have to think about. Tarvek is also quick to use "they'd kill me if I tried, I had no choice" as a defense, but never quite understands that there was always a choice available he didn't consider - die trying. That all said, Tarvek is in generally improving his character over time, and wants to do the right thing, both in the "greater good" sense and doing right by other people individually, and finds himself frustrated at himself that he's often failed. I don't want to discuss Tarvek's ethics too much further here, since there's a great deal to talk about and this is supposed to be a discussion thread! Why do I have to do all the work?
Major Relationships:
- Agatha: Tarvek fell for Agatha pretty damn hard, internally logging her as "future bride", and even at his scummiest times in Sturmhalten was trying to act in her best interest, and just ignoring what she actually wanted and also fucking it up anyway. By the time of the Castle arc, Tarvek has mostly thrown away all of his own ambitions in favor of working for Agatha's, even in moments when he feels pretty hopeless about his actual prospects as a suitor. One major advantage in his court is that he's able to actually articulate his feelings like an adult.
- Gil: It's been a true roller coaster for these two, from friends to enemies to rivals to allies
to secret lovers. It takes a great deal of bonding for their distrust of one another to fall away, and after the time skip Tarvek lists Agatha and Gil (and, by implication, Violetta) as the only people left he really cares about, and the two of them spend a lot more time hugging than you would have expected. - Violetta: Tarvek spent a good deal of his childhood with Violetta, and earnestly tried to protect her. In natural early-Tarvek style, it was by ignoring her wishes and leaving her in the dark, but points for trying. They have a bickering siblings type of relationship, and Violetta is fine trash talking him despite the power imbalance between them. Tarvek is pretty disappointed that he's rebuffed when trying to sincerely express that he's glad she's alive, since she expects childish taunts out of him.
- Aaronev: Tarvek really hates Aaronev for all the horrible things he's done, especially for putting Anevka through the machine, and spends about two seconds mourning after he's killed. Tarvek had been play-acting as a loyal son for years, and it's a bit tragic that Aaronev bought his act wholesale - what little interaction we see suggests that Aaronev, scumbag that he is, did really like Tarvek.
- Anevka: Tarvek did not take it well when it seemed Anevka was going to die, and went to extreme measures to save her. But Tarvek doesn't assign the same level of personhood to the Anevka clank after the original Anevka dies (he's generally not the best at the whole "clanks are people too" concept), and eventually "kills" her by turning her off and throwing her head in a box, where she probably still remains if Sturmhalten hasn't been razed to the ground.
- Lucrezia: While most people hate the Other on a conceptual level, Tarvek has spent enough time with her to really begin to hate her on a personal level. He's aware of her foibles, such as her susceptibility to flattery, and tries to take advantage when he can. His more personal knowledge also makes him better able to detect when Lucrezia is taking over for Agatha than most.
- Higgs: Like many, Tarvek cottons on that Higgs has a secret in Castle Heterodyne. Tarvek does try to keep it under his hat and make excuses on his behalf, but can't resist teasing Higgs despite him being incredibly dangerous. Tarvek openly confronting Higgs about his identity later on nearly gets him strangled to death. Despite that, Tarvek and Higgs have formed a good rapport, and have solid mutual respect. He's even one of the people Tarvek pours his heart out to when he thinks Violetta is dead.
- Neena: Neena has a bit of a crush on Tarvek, and Tarvek for his part does some light flirting at the ball but otherwise doesn't think about her much at this point. It's an odd match for someone like Tarvek, since Neena is earnest, enthusiastic, and completely lacking in guile. Maybe that's exactly what someone like him needs - stranger things have happened!
- Martellus: As two men aiming for the same throne, Martellus and Tarvek are natural enemies. Tarvek obviously dislikes Martellus - and even gets a good punch in - but doesn't take any moves to stop Martellus' forward momentum, and makes no moves towards legitimizing his claim as Storm King beyond not being dead. His strategy may be to just give Martellus enough rope to hang himself with, but it may also show genuine disinterest in this whole Storm King business.