This is gonna sound really stupid and dramatic but anytime I talk with my family or friends or boyfriend they always try their hardest to make me feel better but nothing really works. I just kinda wanna put this into the void and see if anyone else has gone through anything similar.
I'm 19, and I just feel like I'm kind of stupid and talentless. It feels like I don't really have a lot going for me most of the time. Most of all, I just feel horribly mediocre. I'm not talented in anything, and I always feel super behind everyone else. Today I tried out for my permit and I didn't get it- I know I'm super late getting to it and I know I should have done it sooner, and really, I don't really have a reason I didn't. I don't wanna be a burden on anyone, but I feel like I am most of the time. And, being stupid is one thing, right? Like, if I was super pretty, or super good at anything else like math or writing or art or anything, maybe I could make up for it? But the truth is, I'm not. Even when I practice for a long time, I'm just always so average at everything. Or, maybe if I was super kind and helpful I could make up for being such an idiot, but I don't think I am. I try really hard to be kind and stuff, but I don't think it ever works. I know it's horrible, but I'm so jealous of the people around me- they're so smart and sometimes it feels like they don't even have to work for it. I know that's probably not true, but that's what it always feels like. I just wish I knew what I was doing with my life. I know this all comes off as stupid and self pitying, and I already know what everyone would say, so I don't wanna tell them any of it.
Does anyone know how you're supposed to like, find a talent, a purpose, anything? Besides religion. Sometimes I wonder if this is all I'll ever be.

My roommate (25F) and I (23F) met each other on our job. We quickly start a friendship with other girls, creating our own friend group. After my ex-boyfriend and I broke up, I moved out to a room very close to our workplace. After that, we really became close, and we started to meet after work for drinks and talks, but I didn`t really think of them as my best friends. Yeah, we were friends, but not very close. I mean, we knew each other for like 5 months and didn't have a lot of friends in common.
One night, while we were having a drink (I don`t drink, but I don`t mind being around), I commend that I was searching for a new place because in the one where I was, there was a pub litterally down my room, and I couldn't sleep on the weekends. She asked me if I thought about shearing with a friend and proposing herself. TBH, I didn`t really tell her how I liked to live, but we kind of talked about the important stuff, like how it needed to be a place with 2 rooms and where she could have her dog, and how it needed to be close and in our price range (700 euros in total, or about 350 euros).
After searching, we found a cute apartment near our place of work for 670 euros. The only problem was that it was very small, about 50 m2, and one of the rooms was very small, like, it had a twin bed and a little wardrobe, and that was it. no more room. We decided that we would pay the same, but we would change rooms every 3 months. To be honest, I don`t know how we think that was a good idea, but at that time, it seemed good.
The problems start about a month after moving in. She asked me to cover the security deposit during that part of the first month when we started, and I was starting to see how I was the one paying for everything (food, cleaning, needed electronics like a microwave), and she didn`t really look like she was going to pay. So I started to comment about it, not really pushing it but keeping it in mind. Maybe that is not the best, but I have to say that I did not have money. I was being paid at least 800 euros while hers was 1000, and I was having to ask my mother for money to eat at the end of the month because she never paid me back and was eating everything I bought for me. But one day, about 2 months ago, I got super stressed because, after she got fired from her job and resigned for the other 2 months, I started getting mad because it was the 5th and I had 29 euros on my name for the rest of the month. I am very badly confronted. I decided to lie down and tell her that I had a family emergency and I needed her to send me some of the money she owns. At that time, it was about 500 euros. She started to tell me that I was very inconsiderate because she didn't have a job and was also helping to pay her rent.
After that, I decided that I didn't really want to keep the friendship; we didn't really have anything in common (culturally, about relationships, boundaries, etc.), and she didn't talk to me for a week. After that, we stay cordial, but we start to have big problems. Her dog.
She didn't take care of him; he peed and pooped in the living room or kitchen and didn't get clean for hours; he ate two different pairs of shoes; he ate all the sofa cushions; and he bit every inch of the table, chairs, and wood he could find.
I just told her she should start cleaning after her dog and even offered to take him for a walk if she was working. A week passes, and one day, while I was cooking, she got out of her room and started telling me that she was tired of cleaning my sh*t. I have to admit that I am not the most tidy, but I try to keep everything clean, even if it is not organiced. After she tells me that I kind of exploded, I tell her that I was tired of living with her dog.
After that, we start to argue about why I'm not clean or organic, how I'm going to eat to work, and why I haven't even been in the living room in a week because it's full of shit and odd of her dong. After that, she started to scream (tbh, I don't remember how she started screaming, but we both ended up doing it) about how I didn't have the right to tell her how to take care of her dog, and I thought back that I was the one living with it because she was eating at work, sleeping, or parting (nothing wrong with that life, but if you don't have a dog to take care of),. After that, we just insulted each other, and she ended up going to work. and was the start of a 3-week strait where we didn't have any interaction.
A week ago, we started to talk and kind of say sorry to each other, but that was it.
But now it's time to change rooms, like we talked about at the beginning, and she decided not to. So now, I am stuck with the small room, without my money, and having to pay for food for two.
But regardless of the state we are in, she invited "our" friends, who, btw, don't talk to me anymore, to our house at 2/3 am and listen to loud music or talk bad about me (the door of my room leads directly to the living room, so I listen to everything). But now they are telling me that I am the one creating a bad vibe in the home while I am the one who tries to keep everything calm because I don't like confrontation, but maybe that's the problem. Idk
So AITAH?
PD: Sorry for any mistakes; English is not my first language.

so my boyfriend asked me to have a studying session with him. we're on long distance so it would be us having to study something then he'd send me an online exam for us to take. i tried to refuse but he was so excited about it i couldn't bring myself to say no to him. he sent me a video of the subject we're supposed to study and it was an hour long video. he finished the video in time, while i was still on minute 12 when he texted that he finished. i got so distracted and i honestly don't know how that even happened. i told him i haven't finished so he said it's okay take your time. he knows i have adhd and he does too. i asked him how the hell was he able to finish it so quickly without getting distracted, he said that the idea of studying with me was exciting and it motivated him. i took another hour but i only got to minute 28 of the video. i feel so overwhelmed and i can't even bring myself to finish the video because i feel like a failure. i feel like crying and i don't know why i just can't study. i have a lot to study since my exams are so around the corner but i barely study recently, I've heard that this is called adhd waiting mode. im honestly too anxious to do anything and can't help but feel like shit cuz im not studying properly for the exams that would determine my whole future. i just don't like doing anything with people because it makes me overwhelmed and under pressure, i keep getting distracted with people around me and this makes me feel really bad the whole post feels so messy and hard to read i honestly don't know why i suddenly lost my inability to write a proper paragraph so im sorry in advance

For THH I’d have to say Kyoko is my favorite character. I usually love detective characters in any piece of media and I also really like her relationship with Makoto
My least favorite has probably gotta be Hifumi or Junko. Hifumi was annoying asf and expressed borderline predatory behavior at multiple points in the game
Junko was a fine mastermind in the first game though I still thought the hope and despair thing was pretty dumb and kinda cringe even the first time but she just kept coming back and as a result overstayed her welcome
My favorite case in THH is with no competition 1-2. It had so many twists and turns and memorable moments. The genocider reveal, Byakuya messing with the crime scene which was the first time we experienced antagonistic behavior from one of the students in the series, Chihiro being a boy and Mondo’s sad backstory. I loved the antithesis between mondo and chihiro. Also this case is unique cause the murder was done on impulse and wasn’t pre meditated, in contrast to almost all other murders in the series, which made this case even more real to me.
Worst case was 1-3. Because Celeste is just retarded here and so is the rest of the cast. I mean why would the killer want to show which order they killed the victims in with the numbers of the hammers? Celeste is extremely obvious as the culprit and I am convinced she wasn’t even trying to hide it. Throughout that entire trial whenever the cast figures out something Celeste just outright lies and denies it AND THEN GETS PROVEN WRONG. It’s just her who does this, even if she wasn’t the culprit I probably would have still voted for her for acting so suspicious. The name coincidence with Yasuhiro was super dumb and contrived too. What’s most offending though is that the game is trying to convince you even before Celeste gets executed that she’s a good liar. No dude she’s not a good liar, Gonta would probably be a better liar than her. I don’t really mind the unsympathetic motive weirdly, but the rest was awful
For SDR2 my favorite character is Fuyuhiko with Hajime and Chiaki as close 2nds and 3rds respectively. Fuyuhiko had such great character development and a really emotional trial. Even though he was a Yakuza he debatably was one of the most ethical characters in the cast. We stan Fuyuhiko
My least favorite would have to be Akane. Akane is just a waste of a survivor spot. She’s not useful in class trials, she’s not that interesting (yes I’ve played her FTE I still don’t like her) and her being hungry all the time was not funny. The survivor spot should have been given to Hiyoko who really really sucks as well cause she got no development and died a hatable little bitch. What’s worse is that she was gonna get development. And no it was not worth it for Akane to live for the sake of Nekomaru’s memory cause we already have Sonia being a survivor in Gundham’s memory. I am sorry I really don’t like Akane 🙃
Favorite trial is 2-4 I loved learning how that funhouse worked it was really unique and interesting. Also Nagito’s personality shift in this trial was really good too. Gundham was great here, sacrificing himself for the rest of the group while putting on the mask of the villain so they wouldn’t feel sad plus his relationship with Sonia was really cute and seeing her beg Monokuma not to execute him was heartbreaking. Also this was the only murder in the series which was basically consensual besides V3-2 since both Nekomaru and Gundham were ready to sacrifice themselves for the group
Least favorite is 2-3. I- I don’t think I even wanna get into this. The despair disease is one of the worst things I’ve seen in a video game. Literally if anyone else got Mikan’s disease they’d have killed as well, she killed just because she was unlucky. Hiyoko’s murder isn’t even discussed, it’s like no one cares and everyone just assumes the same person killed them both. Mikan who is the clumsiest character in the game pulls inhumane shit that makes no sense and on top of that they assassinate her character by the end of the trial. This is the worst case in the series, fuck 2-3
For V3 my favorite character is Kokichi, he’s my favorite character in the series and one of my favorite fictional characters. He’s so darn complex and interesting and embodies the themes of the game perfectly. I really don’t like how a lot of the fan base seems to mischaracterise him as either some UwU boy or evil incarnate cause the truth is he is very much somewhere in the middle, probably in the grey area but I’d say he’s leaning towards the good side more. I can literally write a 500 word thesis on why this little lying bastard is peak but I won’t get into it here. I also love Shuichi, Kaito and Maki overall they are my 4 favorite in the franchise. I love v3 if you couldn’t telll
As for least favorite I really don’t think V3 has a single bad character imo they were all used extremely well and are all memorable and unique in their own way but if I had to pick one it’d be Tsumugi. I know she had to stick around for the Mastermind reveal but she’s just so boring throughout the entire game which I know is the point but I still would have much rather have had someone else in her place
For my favorite case I’d have to go with V3-5, it’s my favorite in the series actually. This is probably the most complex case in the entire franchise and it pulls it off really well without feeling too convuluted. There so are many twists and turns and great moments here like Maki confessing her love to Kaito, Monokuma teaming up with you and everyone having to come to terms with the fact that kaito was the one who died. Also the fact that the 2 characters who liked each other the least cooked up a plan to defeat the mastermind, really epic plus it was cool to see that Kokichi really wasn’t all that bad in the end and wanted to end the killing game his own way even if that meant he had to go to extreme lengths to do so.
I really don’t think V3 has a bad case I quite enjoyed them all but if I had to pick one as the least good it’d be V3-3. Crazy how all my least favorite cases are chapter 3’s. But unlike the other 2 this one is not as bad. Yes, Korekiyo’s motive is extremely odd and weird but to me it felt kinda refreshing to see a student that was completely mad and done well, looking at you Celeste. If you do Korekiyo’s FTE you’ll understand why he does the things he does and the fact that he mistook his abusive relationship with his sister as love and as a result became mad. It’s pretty interesting, Kork isn’t just funi seesaw dude. He also killed some the 2 most annoying character in the cast so good on you Kork. Other than that even though I didn’t like Tenko I think she went out in a great way passing down her wishes to Himiko and ultimately making her a better and much more interesting character worthy of being a survivor. There are a lot of great emotional moments with Himiko here. The reason why this is my least favorite trial is because of the missed opportunity of having 2 killers. Before we get to that it should also be noted that most of the trial is spent on tenko’s death which is kinda weird seeing as it’s not the one that matters for the entire cast to survive. The fact that the game gets your hopes up for there to be 2 blackends and the fact that they may have to live with a killer among them is so darn disappointing when you learned that Kork killed them both. Overall even though this trial isn’t on par with the rest of the V3 ones I still think it’s a good one despite a lot of people not liking it

I am new here and just want to get this off my chest! So i hope you can help me with some advice. Been with long term relationships, 3 to be exact longest was 4 yrs, minimum 2 yrs) so pretty much I can say that I handle relationships well. Reposting this from my other reddit acct. Also, never experienced any cheating from all those. Recently, I have been dating and the usual is pogi boys na have pretty decent followers sa somed. Until I met a guy that I like, nageffort pa nga sya after 2 days na nagusap to travel 2 hrs so we can meet and did the same effort to go to and visit him naman. There are some things that are new or maybe hindi ko lang narerealize pa. 1. What is it with them about posting tiktok or reels to show off their body, or even dance na may mga kaldag or even pacute cute lang na parangtrying to flirt ba. dont get me wrong I am all for it, but we have talked and agreed that we both are exclusive. One time minessage nya saken yun video na talagang kapag nakita online kulang na lang icomment ng mga tao na ang sarap mo or kaldagin mo din ako. So the overthinker in me, told him sana wag mo ipost okay na ako lang makakita, but he did it anyway and told me hindi naman ako nagrereply sa mga chats nila. He also said na this is the only outlet he has kapag stress ( sabe ko talk to me about it baka i can comfort you) and yet he continues to post stuff. One time i saw him always checking how many likes na yun stories nya or plays etc. i dont have issues abt it support ko sya, pero im afraid na syempre I trust him but i do not trust the people around him, syempre temptation is everywhere baka biglang me tempt.

1. He is a party person gusto nya umiinum. So one time we went out with my friends sa isang bar. Is it true na kapag kunware may nakita kang guy tapos nakipagtitigan ka na hindi ka aware na you did? Ganun kasi yun isa kong nakadate pero i couldnt absorb nun at maintindihan kar ako im aware palagi, just like veryone else kpg me pog lingon ka. But this guy, he said nakikipagtitigan daw yun isang friend ng friend ko tapos titingin din daw sya i asked why? Kasi curious daw sya kung magjowa sila nung isa. moved to another bar na puro sayawan. I can tell he is really drunk, so sa table namen may isang guy na pumoporma dun sa isang girl na kasama namen, naobserve ko 5 times he was always dancing close to the guy so hinila ko sya 3x dito ka sayaw with friends. Pero he finds his way back dun sa guy na malapit. Yun trigger ko na was he was dancing tapos tumitig na sya sa guy like it was more than 5 secs nakatingin and that was my when i walked out and nagpahangin. 30 mins nawala but he did not look for me. My friend then approached me saying na uy he asked if my other friend is str8 daw and when i went back sa bar kinakausap na nya yun isang friend ng friend ko na beks. I was devastated. So the morning i told him abt how i felt kasi paguwi namen lasing na lasing na sya and nakatulog agad. His response was hindi na nya maalala lahat ng ginawa nya after our first bar, and if it was flirting nakita ko daw ba na nagexchange sila numbers facebook or even naghawakan? Which is true, pero the fact na hindi sya makaalala ng anything kpg lasing how can i be so sure kpg ndi nya ako kasama? true din ba na kapag lasing na lasing you dont remember anything?
2. I dont demand time talaga but our setup is somehow LdR kasi malayo, both of us are new sa gantong setup. For me no matter how busy i am, i find time to update and message him, but for him either it will take 2-3 hrs to respond or kpg reply one liner. He tells me he is responding if not busy naman. Communication is impt for me the mere fact na kahit sabihan mo lang ako na im doing soemthign or office na ako i would appreciate kasi i respect your personal time. Pero sometimes i feel like ako lagi yun mageeffort to message and he is obliged to reply. Even sa mga. Calls ko ndibsya sasagot or kpg sasagot mabilisang usap lang, pero kpg sya na tatawag akobnaman sagot agad.

Sorry ang haba ng story. If youve reached this part sana you can advise me. TIA.

TW: sexual abuse, sexual assault, harassment, stalking
I (22F) started working at a supermarket close to my parents’ home when I was 19; it didn’t pay much, but I had to attend classes in the evening since I was still in highschool and finding another job would’ve been extremely hard.
After a couple of months I stated making friends at work and we started hanging out after work hours. One of my colleagues, let’s call him Creep (28M, at the time), had a crush on me and I could tell, but I was too shy and anxious to turn him down immediately. A few months later, I was assigned to a different department and started seeing him less and less (not that I minded, he was kinda creepy in everything he did - even in the way he speaks, but i later found out that he has problems communicating because of how he was raised by deaf parents).
One day he texted me saying that he would’ve come to the store to give me a ride back home (I lived literally 5 mins away from my workplace lol) once I finished my turn. I gently declined, I didn’t need a ride home, I could’ve just walked, but he insisted saying that he had something to tell me. I didn’t have a choice basically. Once we were in the car I asked him what he had to tell me so urgent he couldn’t have waited to see me at work. He confessed that he had a crush on me, that he noticed since we didn’t get to spend much time together anymore and he missed me, asking me what I thought about it and if I would give it a shot. I told him no, I was already seeing someone and I had no interest in persuing something else. I got off the car and said goodbye, but it seemed pretty chill between us.
A few weeks later we were hanging out with some of our friends, had a couple of drinks and, once we were alone, he kissed me. Back in the days my anxiety was pretty bad, I dissociated hard after that, feeling insecure because it seemed like my words didn’t mean a thing - I already turned him down, but he didn’t care.
The following day we had plans with other friends, so I asked him to meet me a little early so we could talk about what happened. He picked me up, he parked near where we hat to meet other people and he immediately cut me off when I started speaking. I was shocked at what he started blabbing.
Him:“So, since we are now dating, I just wanted to let you know a couple of things. I don’t want my girlfriend to go out and get drunk with male friends like you do; I don’t want you to dress like a whore, either-“
Me: “Well, you’re lucky then, since I am NOT your girlfriend.”
Right at that moment I got a phone call, so I picked it up. It was one of our friends, asking for details about the plans we had that evening. While I was talking to him, I suddently felt something wet and soft and disgusting in my other ear - yep, he started licking my ear and my neck out of the blue. Then he grabbed one of my tits, he put his hand between my thights and he touched me. I was shocked, my first reaction was freezing immediately, I was scared and it fucked with my brain badly because I was already sexually assaulted at 17. And he knew it. He knew that I wouldn’t have reacted, that it was too much for me to elaborate, that I was still recovering from my previous assault. I stood there holding my breath, hoping that he wouldn’t go further, because I didn’t have the strength to go through that again. I put down the phone and stared at him while shaking, unable to speak and frightened as hell. He was calm, as if nothing happened, and he continued his monologue. “I know it may seem a bit weird, but I’m still a virgin and I want you to be my first”, he said with dreamy eyes. I wanted to puke. He just molested me, but kept talking as if we were in a relationship. I told him once again that I already had a boyfriend, but couldn’t do anything more than that. I was dissociating so bad, even I started behaving like nothing happened and I don’t know why. Maybe if I played his game I would be safe. Maybe I wasn’t processing properly due to my previous abuse. I don’t know, but I still regret it because it was like telling him that it was fine and he could do whatever he wanted.
A few days later, when I saw him at work, I told him - ONCE AGAIN - that I wasn’t interested, I had a boyfriend, and if it helped him get over it I would stop speaking to him for a while so he could take his time. At first he said he agreed, but after a couple of hours he stopped me in the storehouse saying that he thought about it and he couldn’t accept it, he wanted to keep being my friend and talk to me. I told him “well, i have already told you what I think, I’m sorry but I think it’s better off this way. Now I don’t have time to talk about this again, I’m working”. I turned my back and went for the door - that’s when he suddently GOT ANGRY. He started screaming that he couldn’t stand the idea of not talking me, while blocking the door so I couldn’t get out. I was scared to death. I tought he was going to hit me or something, but nothing happened, he quickly calmed down and let me leave. I stopped talking to him completely. And he. Went. Crazy.
Whenever he walked past me he “”accidentally”” touched my butt; he did anything to find and excuse to talk to me; he always came too close to me to creep me out; he followed me whenever I had a break and went out to smoke a cigarette. My silence didn’t last long, since I got transfered again in the same department as him. Sometimes we were the only two people working during the shift, so I was forced to talk to him at least about work related stuff. So I did. He was ecstatic, he thought we were mending our relationship and he got 10X worse. He texted me weird pictures, he started replying to my Instagram stories with sexual comments, he started following me when I went to school after work, he followed me anywhere I went in general. He also told me weird stories that creeped me out even more.
I started asking my co-workers for help, begging them to stick around so he wouldn’t be near me alone, asking for advice on how to handle it. I didn’t feel safe talking to my supervisors for multiple reasons, and at the time I was just a troubled kid with ptsd. I didn’t have the tools to handle it. So I just stayed quiet. My mental health was getting worse day by day, I was paranoid, alienated, depressed, anxious and scared of everything. I stopped talking to everyone at work, I wasn’t able to interact because I felt as if I had forgotten how to do that. I was miserable. I started going to therapy and took 5 months off to focus on getting better.
But, 5 months later, I had to go back to work.
[The story is too long, if you are interested I’ll post the rest, I just needed a safe space to share this experience and get some advice on how to heal from all of this maybe?]

What works for me might not work for you, but this has seriously turned my life around in the last year.

1. Internalize the Shame Repeat after me; it is embarrassing to be an independent young person out in the world who cannot behave normally around food or feed yourself. Eating disorders are an immature manifestation of underlying issues. I tell myself: girlfriend, get a grip!! This isn’t cute and you’re not 16! Time to be an adult who has actual dreams and ambitions.
   
2. Bully other anorexics This may seem cruel but it’s critical. As an inherently competitive disease, the second you recognize the pathetic nature of ED pride, you can utilize it to villainize and belittle anyone who actively engages in it. Once you are able to see past the self gratification and glorification, you can meet your triggers with unbridled rejection. When I see a visibly ill woman on the street I’ll send a picture to my boyfriend and say I want to push her over. When my waifish friends do the “I forgot to eat all day now I’m shaking” song and dance I say wow your eating disorder behavior is really in display and I don’t like it. Bully it out of yourself and then your world.
   

Okay, so for this post there are a lot of people involved (this has been going on for a while) so I'll list up here who's who. This is my wife's family. I'll be using code names when appropriate:
Father-in-law - FIL
Mother-in-law - MIL
Wife(oldest daughter) - Wife
Second daughter - Sarah
Third daughter - Lana
Fourth daughter - Ruth
Second daughter's husband - BIL
Third daughter's fiancee - Karl
My daughter - daughter
Second daughter's older son - Danny
Second daughter's younger son - Aaron
And me as me
I know this is long but bear with me TL;DR Brother-in-law has snapped the last straw for the family and we are all starting to cut ties with him

 BIL's family has their own side of the story that I'm barely familiar with, so it won't be brought up here. We first met BIL way before they got together; Sarah bought a house as a group of friends with her boyfriend at the time, and BIL and his second wife at the time. We didn't interact with him much. We just heard a few stories about him from their friend group. Eventually this situation broke down and BIL and his second wife left and vandalized Sarah's home on the way out. They let their dogs poop all over the floor, stole some miscellaneous items, poured water in their lawn mower gas tank, etc. He did this to Sarah, his future third wife. We thought this guy was out of our lives forever. Sarah eventually came to stay on my couch after she sold the house. She lived with me and my wife for roughly 3 months. Then she went and rented an apartment a few miles away. No sooner than a few weeks did we find out she was dating future BIL, and a few weeks after that we found she was pregnant. He met the family and stated that he wanted to be a part of it. He blamed all his past transgressions on his second wife. We questioned him at the time if he was still with his second wife. He said no, and that he was officially divorced. My wife looked up the public court records and found out that he didn't file divorce papers until 11 days after we asked that question. A small lie but considering our history of knowing him it was concerning. BIL is a big gun enthusiast. About 1 months after they told us Sarah was pregnant, while cleaning a gun at home he shot himself in the hand. Again, we were concerned but Sarah assured us he was a changed man and this was just an unfortunate accident. His hand healed but he didn't do his physical therapy that seriously so his hand is still kind of jacked up. I feel this is important because he kind of has a history of not following through on what he says. During Sarah's pregnancy we found out that BIL seriously beat one of their dogs back when they bought the house together. We also figured out he diagnosed himself with bipolar, but refused to go to a doctor to get an actual diagnosis. The whole family at the time was distracted by all of this because during Sarah's pregnancy my wife went through a major medical struggle that resulted in multiple surgeries and a months-long stay in the hospital. We were so focused on that the BIL details just kind of came and went at that moment. Sarah gave birth to Danny during COVID lockdown. We were so excited and we all were very active in Danny's life. Time would pass and we just kind of got used to BIL being despite the fact that he often would miss family events. BIL and Sarah would move into a house on my in-laws property just down the road from in-laws house. MIL became their primary caregiver as she could work it around her job and still make decent money. As 4 years have passed my MIL, FIL, Lana, my Wife and I all take shifts of watching their now 2 kids for them, for free. MIL also watches my daughter but significantly less that their son's. 2 years would pass after Danny was born and everything seemed OK. There would just be hints in they way he talked about who he really was. He would say something in casual conversation like "man, there seems like there are too many black people in commercials these days" or "I don't know why we are forcing women's sports to be a thing." Bigoted stuff like that, but veiled enough so there was plausible deniability. I would often call him out on it, so he really grew to not like me. This all changed at his 30th bday. He had a big party with a lot of alcohol and weed with dozens of friends. My wife and I didn't go because we are not party people. Lana and Ruth went to the party. Sarah was also there. During this party BIL went outside and decided to "mud" his jeep through the creek beside their house. This was possibly with Karl but I'm not sure of that to this day. Karl has recently come into the picture prior to this event and was previously friends with BIL for a long time. The jeep got stuck and flooded for obvious reasons. After trying to get it out of the creek by multiple means, they gave up and left it there. I believe it took almost 2 days to get it out. He went back to the party and as everyone got progressively drunk and high, my 2 sister-in-laws Lana and Ruth (I believe) criticized BIL for getting his car stuck in a creek while playing. BIL verbally assaulted them and demanded they get out of his house. They left in tears. They drove separately, and Lana had gotten buzzed so they both got in Ruth's car and drove to my house. They sat and vented to my wife and I for a while, and eventually I offered that we should go do something fun to take their minds off of it. My wife and I drove them to Taco Bell and we got some food and drove around town for a while and made jokes in the car. After they cooled off and were in a better mood they said that Lana needed to go get her car from the party. In a flurry she accidentally left her keys inside her sister's and BIL's house. We drove them over just in case anything sketchy happened but Lana and Ruth didn't want us to go inside, so we waited out in the car. She didn't think it would be a big deal to walk in, but as her and Ruth did BIL immediately got in her face and demanding she gets out or else. Ruth went to talk to someone else at the party and didn't notice this at first. BIL shoved Lana against a wall and held her there. Everyone apparently stood in stunned silence as this happened. He then shoved her to the ground, grabbed her around the ankles and started pulling her across the floor. As he was threatening to do even worse, Ruth ran up and jumped on his back and gave him a head lock. She screamed at him to stop but before BIL could anything about this everyone finally woke up and pulled them apart. Ruth helped Lana up and they ran out of the house onto the front porch sobbing. My wife saw this and got out of the car and yelled at them to get back in our car. We drove up to the in-laws house. By then it was past midnight. MIL was about an hour away working her job and FIL was up in his room asleep. The sisters went and woke him up and explained the situation through tears. They also called MIL to inform her of the situation. He got ready and ask me to go with him down to the house to get some answers. The sisters stayed up at the house. We drove down in his car and when we got out the entire party was ready for us and greeted us at the car. Literally over a dozen people, most of whom I did not recognize started screaming what happened at both of us simultaneously. Everyone was clearly very drunk. FIL looked overwhelmed, so I raised my hands and tried asking everyone to stop for a second and go one by one telling their bit of the story. BIL stopped me mid sentence and pointed his finger in my face. I noticed he had his other hand on a holstered hand gun. He yelled out "You don't have a say here! You're barely even part of this family." For context, I had been with my wife for over 11 years at that time and he hadn't even married Sarah yet and had been there about 2 1/2 years. FIL backed up and told me that I need to stop talking and that I was being a problem. I backed off and went over the yard to Sarah and Karl. I asked Sarah what happened and she told me that she didn't see what happened and that she wasn't very aware of what was going on now. Karl would barely answer the same question. I walked back over to FIL but he told me to back off and that I really wasn't needed there. Admittedly I felt pretty insulted and just decided to walk back to his house and get my car and go home with my wife. We eventually left after FIL came back to the house. We found out later that BIL had pulled his gun out and threatened to kill himself if FIL didn't leave. Out of fear of what he would do, my in-laws were pretty afraid to take action at this point. A lot of the situation was his word against someone else's and Sarah went on a tour around to the friends and convinced them not to take any of this to the police. She then tried to smooth things over with the family and offered that BIL would apologize to everyone. He then refused, stating that Ruth was the real aggressor and that she assaulted him. He eventually agreed to apologize to just FIL for causing a problem and I think some half-hearted apologies to Lana and Ruth. The whole situation was swept under the rug but an unease has existed over the family since then. He stopped coming to family events pretty much altogether. About 4 months after this situation, prior to my daughter being born, he told MIL he was going to bring Danny up to their house so she could watch him for a few hours while he took a nap. His job works long hours so this wasn't out of the ordinary. However, he didn't show up for a while and my MIL started questioning what going on. She called but there was no answer. She drove down to his house and knocked but there wasn't an answer, only Danny crying in the background. She let herself in and found BIL asleep on the couch with Danny actively trying to wake him up. MIL tried to wake him up but nothing for a few minutes. She gave up and wrote a note to let him know where Danny was. BIL didn't notice Danny was gone for 2 hours. He finally woke up, drove up to in-laws house, and yelled at my MIL for just taking Danny without informing him. He took Danny and then left. A few months after that, after my daughter was born, He fell asleep while watching Danny again. This time we found out because when he woke up the front door was open and Danny was gone. He called in-laws for help finding him. My in-laws have a large property (about 200 acres) with a ton of it forested. Danny wandered 1/4 of a mile into the woods and I believe it took roughly a little over an hour to find him. Family questioned him hard this time but he just recoiled back into their house and didn't talk to us much. Sarah continued to defend him and said it was just an accident. Again the police were not notified about any of this. There was always this idea that if we went to authorities about any of this they would just run for it. They would then surprise everyone with the news that they were pregnant again, despite the fact that Sarah had used the morning after pill. This whole time they hadn't married yet. They announced that they were getting married but Sarah told Lana that it was mostly just to help BIL not have to go through bankruptcy a second time. I wasn't sure if this would do anything to help that situation, but that's what Sarah said at one point leading up to the wedding. About a month before the wedding, however, he threatened Sarah that if she insisted on inviting my wife to the wedding he would demand to invite a friend of his that Sarah hated. This friend also used to date BIL I believe. This was his ploy to force Sarah to not invite my Wife or me. The 2 other sisters and MIL all stood in solidarity with us and said that they would also not go if we weren't invited. He eventually relented and they got married a little before Aaron was born. As more kids were added, MIL's childcare duties got much harder. Eventually my wife and I started paying her (not much but something at least. $150 a month) to watch our daughter, but we also did chores for her, bought her food often, and eventually my Wife started taking a few shifts to watch all 3 children. To date, BIL and Sarah have never compensated any of us for our work. It's a little frustrating but we've tried to understand because Sarah and BIL seem to be bad with money. They objectively make more than us yet can't afford to pay MIL anything. Last Thanksgiving, in the middle of dinner, Sarah and BIL decided to have an "intervention" and talk about how we were not treating BIL fairly. They addressed everybody but really honed in on me specifically. This seemed to be because the rest of the family kind of dance in eggshells around them, while to be frank I'm pretty honest about how I feel about them. They seemed to think I was causing the family to turn against him and questioned why I would do that. I told him he lacked humility. He said he didn't understand. I told him that if he admitted to his mistakes and actually apologized about any of the stuff I previously wrote, instead of blaming everyone and everything else then the whole family would feel a bit different about him. A lot of talk was about the 30th b-day and other times when I just ignored him and how he had already apologized about the party. I reminded him that he didn't apologize to most of the family and he blamed Ruth. He then stated that Ruth was the cause of a lot of the problems at that party. He also made a big deal about how the family doesn't trust him with my daughter and kept emphasizing how he has never held her. We finally tried to come to an agreement. I told him I would try to talk to him more and try to understand him better and he said he would try to come to family events more. He also wanted more of a relationship with my daughter. We left and my wife and I were skeptical but we said that if this is who Sarah really wanted to be with, as long as BIL wasn't perceived as a threat he could have more contact with our daughter. We have had way more of a relationship with his kids than he has had with our daughter so I tried to sympathize with that imbalance. Karl also stated later that having known BIL for a long time, he thought he was very sincere. To date, BIL has not asked or tried at any family events to spend any time with my daughter, despite having numerous opportunities. Now to the current situation. About a month ago Lana and Karl announced that Lana was pregnant. This was a revelation due to Lana having a medical condition that made it harder to get pregnant. A lot of excitement was brewing in the family because of this. Karl has been seeming like a good partner to Lana, and proposed to her a little before the pregnancy happened. This is especially pertinent because Lana and Karl moved into a house together right beside BIL and Sarah. A few days ago they were over at Sarah and BIL's house when an argument broke out between Sarah and BIL. BIL demanded that Sarah wasn't an "obedient enough wife" and that if she wanted there marriage to work then she was going to have to get better at serving him. She was upset and they weren't coming to an agreement so he was going to leave, but apparently he was very high so Sarah refused to give him the keys to his car. He got extremely mad and then got a gun, held it to his head, and threatened to kill himself if she didn't hand over the keys. Fortunately, Danny and Aaron were taking a nap during all of this. Sarah called the police during this whole exchange and the operator heard a lot of what BIL said over the phone so based on that they arrived at the house. He apparently drove away and it took the police a bit to find him but once they did he turned himself over. They admitted him to a mandatory 72-hour stay at a psychiatric ward for a mental health assessment. Sarah then came up to the rest of the family (not me or my Wife) and gave them Danny and Aaron. She then went and confided with Lana and Karl about how abusive BIL had been and how life was just miserable right now. A lot of us, especially Karl and my in-laws, were telling her that she needs to leave BIL and file for emergency custody of her children. She seemed to be listening to us and turning a corner, but inexplicably the psychiatric ward allowed BIL to have a phone call with Sarah and they had a long conversation. Suddenly, Sarah shut us all out and completely changed her story. She started defending BIL again. BIL was then let out of the psychiatric ward a day early. Since Karl was working at the time, Lana came to stay with us and then over at her in-laws. We are especially concerned about her safety around BIL due to her being pregnant. They have since cut nearly all contact with us for 4 days now. They have only told Karl that they were getting a new TV because the old one mysteriously broke somehow. They have continued to post on social media like nothing has happened. They have spent 2 days with BIL's family so we aren't sure what their opinion of this is, though we do know a sibling of his has also told Sarah to leave him prior to this latest situation. We don't know what their plans for childcare is because they are wholly reliant upon us. Lana is very reluctant to ever be home alone. Ruth is as well. There are so many other details I haven't mentioned. There have been holes in walls they've had to fix. There is some evidence that BIL is cheating on Sarah, but that evidence is somewhat inconclusive. The bigoted comments for a while now have gotten increasingly misogynistic. It's a lot of 'we need to respect proper gender roles' kind of stuff. There's just too much and I've already written a book on here. I don't really know what to do at this point. Because a lot of this stuff has been swept under the rug it's hard to tell how seriously CPS or police would take our claims. FIL has threatened to kick them out of their very cheap rental they're in now. Who knows what they would do in that scenario. I know this post is detailed and because of that BIL or Sarah might see it, but at this point I wonder if I even give a shit. They've already eluded to keeping their sons from us in the past and the vibes we are getting now is that they are already doing it. And from the bottom of my heart, fuck BIL. 

So a little back story about my exs lil sister, we’ll call her Anna, Anna is a year younger than her older brother less than a year younger than me. I met her from my ex I’ll call him Chad. We met when I was 13 and he was 14. I met Anna the following year when I was 14 and she was 13. Drama didn’t start right away, but she didn’t take school seriously her freshman year she ended the year with about 4 credits and next year her sophomore year only got 2 and after her sophomore year she dropped out saying for “mental health” even tho she was doing online school, no job, and was just trying to act like a bad ass. Anna was living with her father and step mom with her brother and half sister, she started getting rebellious smoking weed, smoking nic, having sex with a lot of guys and also going partying. She would run out of her house to go do whatever she wanted, one time I was even was on FaceTime with my ex as she was throwing a tantrum she locked herself in the bathroom screaming that she doesn’t care about her step mom or half sister because their not blood and she doesn’t care if they die, because they tried to take her phone away. She then ended up calling one of her boyfriends to pick her up and she ran out of the house and into his truck, her parents ended up calling the police and she texted her parents off a different phone and when her parents asked where she was her response was “it’s none of your business” she returned the next morning. It turned into a normal thing of her skipping school, sneaking off, breaking things in the house and going into her parent room to steal her phone. She then told her school she was being abused, which got debunked almost instantly since her brother testified and video recording from the neighbors driveway, because she claimed her dad staged her by her head and slammed her head into his truck door, her step mom had a video of her on the porch yanking out her own hair, no damage to the car and video shows her screaming at her house. Her mom locked her out because she didn’t feel safe with her being aggressive with a 2 year old in the house. Her father then put up cameras around the inside and outside of the house just to always have evidence of her lies. One time of her taking the bus to school she got in a fight with someone age 11 when she was 14 then posted on instagram bragging about getting charged with assault. She then made a claim that she wanted to kxxl herself so her family took her to a mental hospital the doctor told her parents she had no mental issues she’s just spoiled and will act out for people attention. Anna would constantly go to social media to complain about getting mistreated by her family. It got to the point her family knew there was not much they could do to help her, and they felt worried for their baby growing up around that. They ended up moving her into a family friends house where her parents stayed in contact with the parents of the other house and they gave money. There was parents and a daughter two years younger she became best friends with it was going well for the first few months but then Anna started to steal from the daughter I’ll call her Nat, they started to not get along and the friends Nat introduced her too she started talking shit about Nat to them. Anna was now 15 attempting to get jobs but couldn’t hold a job because of her bad attitude, well after 9 months Anna slept with Nats boyfriend, Nats boyfriend told Nat about what happened, the mom made Anna call her boyfriend and tell him how she cheated. The tension was too high and the parents told Anna parents they couldn’t take care of Anna anymore, Annas parents then talk to family, and Anna Uncle agreed to let her move in, she was 16 at this point and she moved in with her uncle and his girlfriend. She got a job at a sub place, but she kept smoking and having sex with random people. Well, she started getting into a lot of vocal arguments with his girlfriend and her uncle ended up texted my boyfriend asking if she can live with him. Her uncle said she was just selfish, and doesn’t like being told no. At this time her brother was living in a house with 3 guys with no extra room. I had my own two bedroom apartment, so I talked to her parents and they felt like I was a good choice and I asked Anna because even tho I wasn’t a fan of her I still felt like she needs her own room and she agreed. So her uncle drove her and her stuff to my place. Her family gave me some money to get her some furniture and they gave me a run down, also told me they’re are going to call to check up on her. I asked if she had any allergies or mental issues, she told me no but that she’s likely going to tell me a huge list of what’s wrong with her. So first day she moved in I took her to get fast food and asked some questions. She said she was abused by her parents Nats boyfriend pressured her to sleep with him and that her uncle was manipulative. Every story she told me she made herself a victim. She then asked me if I had any mental issues which I said I have PTSD and MDD and she asked me what MDD was, I explained it to her. I then asked her if she had any issues and she gave me a LIST she said anxiety, depression, borderline personality disorder , bi polar disorder, OCD, MDD, and PTSD. Even tho she had to ask me what MDD meant, but I didn’t confront her because her parents warned me that if I doubt her she will act out. So the first week, I got her a job where I work, started to teach her to drive and helped her set up a bank account went to the Apple Store so she could buy herself a new phone. Instantly I could tell why she kept getting fired, she was on her the entire time and everytime I looked over she was taking photos or videos of herself. She did not want to work so I did a lot of her work just so I didn’t get a bad rep. About day 4 she asked if she can invited a guy over that she knew on Snapchat. I said sure MY MISTAKE. This guy was a wanna be gangster, and he brought his friend, in front of him she acted awful, swore she was a fighter and badass, they ended up fucking and next day he was still there he did some Molly and drank a lot. My friend came over and Anna started to threaten her and say she could beat her ass in front of the guys. I took her into a room alone and told her to knock it off. We’ll later that night the guys wanted to bring over some girls, I was trying to sleep and my friend told me how, she told they guys she can drive them with my car. IVE ONLY TAKEN HER DRIVING TWICE. So I agreed to pick the girls up but told them I would be driving them back that night. It’s going good for a while until Anna starts talking shit about one of the girls and called her ghetto, this girl was 13 and Anna was 17. That girl confronted Anna, Anna swore up and down she didn’t say anything, then after 10 mins of pressing her Anna admitted she called her ghetto. This girl beat her ass. Anna started crying and this girl came up to her and said that wasn’t a fair fight, that she can get 5 mins to put her hair up and get some water but they were gonna run it again. Everyone is in my living room talking then they go outside and she gets her ass beat again, Anna then goes into my bathroom in my bedroom, anytime I went in she told me to kick them out. I told her she wanted them here she has to tell them to get out but I’ll have her back. It got to the point I tried to sleep on my couch, so the guys tried getting Anna to go to her room so I could sleep but she screamed at them. So the two girls went in and told her she needs to go to her room. Anna picked up a bunch of my stuff on the counter and threw it at the sink. The 16 year old girl got pissed and wanted to fight her, but I said she had enough and if she needed to get it off her chest we can fight, we ended up scrapping. It got late so I went to drive them home… pt 2?

So, I'll may seem like a horrible person, but I genuinely love my boyfriend who I'll call A, he's really sweet and I wouldn't ask for anything more, he's kind, he plays the same videogames as me, he wishes me good morning and goodnight despite out 8 hour time difference, and I genuinely love him with all my heart, he's all I could ever ask for. I've been dating A for around 4 months.
But as per the title, I also have another man in my heart, a guy in my university, let's call him H. We're in the same course (I'm doing a degree in physics) and we've bonded over some of the topics and theories discussed (states of matter, cold fusion, warp engines, ect), now I'd like to clarify, I've had a crush (if I can even call it that) on H for way longer than A and myself have been dating, but when i initially met A, he completely blew me away with how well our personalities match.
A is a homebody and doesn't work out, but he's not severely overweight, I mean, he's still really cute to me, but idk, there's something about H that just takes my breath away every time I see him, H is very active and I can tell he has a great body, well, I know he does, because he invited me to watch one of his water-polo matches. I'd like to clarify, I've never once found athletic bodies this attractive before, in most cases I preferred boys with some meat on their bones. I'd personally say thay A has my favourite body type.
I'm genuinely so conflicted, I don't know what to do, I don't want to cheat because that's just cruel and horrible. In the long run however I'm not sure my heart can take being with H for another year without saying anything. Non of my friends are helping me, saying things like "go for H, he's got a hotter body", they keep trying to get me to break up with A to get with H, but i don't want to leave A, as he's the first guy I've dated who's treated me with genuine love and affection. But at the same time H treats me kindly and is always there when I'm going through something tough, not to mention his brain stored everything. I love H's laugh, i love his smile, I love the way he speaks, I love the way he smells, but I can say the same things for A.
So please Reddit... what should I do?
Also, for extra information, I've known H since year 8 (like grade 7?) And A got about a year.

Has any men here changed their mind about a pregnancy and if so why?
So me and my boyfriend have been together 3 years. We have had 2 pregnancies already that ended in miscarriage. Last year he was so hell bent on having a child, he really wanted to become a dad etc. We split up for a while during the end of last year and was healing from our trauma (mostly due to the miscarriages we just weren't good for each other at the time and needed time away to heal) anyway fast forward to this year and we are back together. We spoke again about children and I said that I would like to wait until next year to start trying again for a baby (2025) as during my healing I started to realise maybe l'm not as ready for a baby as l initially thought (but who really is lol). He agreed to this so that was our plan. I am now pregnant and he wants me to have an abortion. He is dead set on not having this child and Thave absolutely no idea why. He keeps saying it's because it's not our plan, it's not in the plan etc. and I know men are very different from women, you guys tend to think more logically whereas we women tend to think more emotionally. He has a million and one goals he "hasn't accomplished yet" and "we agreed next year to start trying" so he is hell bent that he does not want this baby at all, full stop. Even though half these goals he has accomplished or is in the process of completing so I just don't understand where this is all coming from. I am at the point thinking will he ever have enough? Will he ever be ready? Our first pregnancy he was really scared as this was the first time ever he had gotten someone pregnant and he did say he wasn't sure if he wanted it as he was still in uni, didn't have a job, no house etc so he hadn't completed his "goals" but eventually he came around but sadly we lost it. It's like he never has enough, before it was because he was in uni and didn't have a proper job (which is fair enough!) but he still eventually came around to the idea. Now he has finished his uni and has a stable, well paying job, and he has a car etc. so he's already completed the goals he set out before but now he has come with a whole bunch of new goals (that really just seem like excuses at this point) as he doesn't have a house, however he is in the process of buying a house which would be completed by the time the baby is born!!! I know men tend to never feel like they are ready for a child unless they have the typical car, job, house etc but nobody is ever truly ready for a baby even with all that stuff & it's not like he doesn't have any of that stuff under his belt if you get what I mean. He is a wonderful man, he's so kind and compassionate and he would make an amazing dad. He's so understanding and protective but has a lovely soft side to him. I adore him so much, I am just so shocked by his reaction to this pregnancy as he is in a better place than he ever was with our other pregnancies and he wanted those 2 but this one he is dead set against and I really don't understand why.
I have tried speaking to him about it and I have tried putting all these points across to him but he just shuts it down and says he's not going in circles about it. I'm just genuinely shocked by the reaction as it's not like him at all to be like this. Part of me feels like maybe it's because of our miscarriages but even if so why ask for an abortion? That's way worse than a miscarriage.
I guess my question really is have any men here been dead set against a pregnancy, even as going far as asking for an abortion but then changed their mind about it and is now a family? If so, what was it that changed your mind or what was it that clicked for you? Is there anything I can do to get him to change his mind? As it's not like this is something he never ever wanted, he did want this it's just not happened in the time frame we agreed, it's happened a year ahead of schedule. I just don't know what to do? For someone who agreed to have children to then turn around and do this is just caught me completely off guard. I know nobody here will have the answers to my specific situation, I am just wondering if maybe any men here have been in a similar situation and can shed any light as he has completely shut down. I just don't know how to make it better or help him. If there is anything I can do or show him that would make him take a second thought or even change his mind? I'm at a loss tbh

We have been very low contact for the last 6 months.
Recently I was browsing reddit, and discovered that my nmom and I have a certain sub in common. As I was reading I thought, wow that sounds a lot like my nmom. Sure enough, I look at the user name and it is her (she uses it for everything). Of course I cannot resist the urge to see what else she has been posting about. I discovered that she has been frequenting a trauma survivors sub and giving out advice on how to have healthy relationships. She is a trauma survivor but she has no business giving advice. She is the most toxic person I have ever known (besides my ex stepmother) and has never had a successful relationship with anyone, family or otherwise (my brother hasn’t talked to her in years). In her posts, she uses me over and over again as an example of someone who is “enmeshed” with my children. I will have to ask my therapist about this because honestly I don’t know if my children and I are enmeshed. Can’t say that I even know what that would look like in a family. From my point of view they are all well adjusted, kind, free thinking, people with full autonomy. They are all grown adults and no longer live at home with me.
She also says that she has no idea how I turned out this way because I basically had a good childhood and if anything she blames my father. My dad is a good person, although he has married two different narcissists. My mother is covert and his second wife was absurdly overt. I was severely neglected by nmom; never hugged, always ignored, given the silent treatment (once for 3 months when I was 14), made to feel as if my feelings were worth nothing, etc. When I bring up anything from my childhood she says that’s not how it happened or that it never happened. I could detail really disgusting things from my childhood but I won’t go into it here
When I was 10 I used to daydream about my best friend’s mom being my mom. She was so warm and nurturing to her kids and also to me. She had cute nicknames for me which made me feel like I was special to her. I loved being at their house. As I grew older I began to make friends with people who were just as damaged as I was
Nmom also states in her posts that she and I were not enmeshed as I was growing up and that she was not raised in an environment like that so she is just baffled at how I could have turned out so badly (this is not word for word, I am paraphrasing). She says that I have never apologized for anything in my life. I remember many years ago trying to apologize to her for getting angry with her in front of my kids. She literally looked at me, blinked, and changed the subject as if I never said it. This has happened a number of times so eventually I learned that apologies mean nothing to her. She on the other hand has never apologized to me for anything and has never uttered the words “I love you”, to any of her kids. Maybe with the exception of when we were babies but I have no memory of that
She also stated that I never “allowed her to have a relationship” with my kids. My kids started to dislike her all on their own when they were very young. My youngest would cry if grandma was coming over. Reason being that nmom would start talking about “end of days” and we are all going to die horrible deaths because of climate change and that we need to have a suicide pact. Scared the shit out of my youngest starting around age 7. Around 15 years ago she said we all had about 5 years left to live before the shit hit the fan
Nmom was raised in an alcoholic household with sexual abuse that was ignored. My grandmother was also a narcissist. Grandmother used to say similar things about my aunt, that she was a “bad seed” and they had no idea what was wrong with her or how she got that way. No one in the family has seen my aunt in over 30 years. She would be around 80 years old now.
This is more of a rant than anything else as there is really nothing I can do about her giving advice to other people and outright lying about me. Even though it’s anonymous, it still stings that my own mother would speak of me like that when she knows full well 95% of it is lies and the other 5% has a grain of truth that she has twisted and distorted to fit her insane narrative. She describes me as an absolute monster. I don’t understand how lying to internet strangers makes her feel good but it must since she keeps doing it. I found over 30 posts about me and my kids.
I am always willing to own up to things I have done wrong as a parent. It does hurt to admit some of these things because it’s such an awful feeling when you realize you may have damaged your own kids. But I think it is part of the healing process for everyone involved if you can own it and apologize. In recent months I have done so much apologizing that my oldest daughter finally said “mom not everything you did was abusive and you have to stop thinking it was”
I don’t know whether to block nmom so I no longer see her posts or to call her out on her outrageous lies. I’m inclined to do the latter, then block her
It makes me sick that nmom of all people is dishing out advice on how to have healthy relationships!
If you’ve gotten this far, thanks for reading ❤️

So My (20M) almost 2-year GF(21F) were sitting on the couch. She pulled up my phone (she knows all my passcodes) and started looking through my Instagram ‘clicked links’ history, which I could also see. She scrolled for a minute and then found that I had clicked on 3 consecutive Onlyfans Links. I then proceeded to tell her that I get some of those on my page, and so sometimes I click them, not having any ulterior motive or anything like that. She then proceeded to tell me immediately that she was upset and needed some time to think. I obviously understood as she must’ve been hurt by the idea that I was looking at other people. In fact, I wasn’t, and you can’t even see anything without paying.
2 days later, when she asked to give her space, she turned up at my house and said, “That was a dealbreaker”, so now it’s over. She told me she felt “objectified” and “cheated on”. She didn’t even give me a chance to explain or talk anything through. She accused me of paying for it or signing up, but she didn’t want to look at my emails or my bank account statements when I offered. At that moment, I was really flustered, so I didn’t say anything back and just respected her decision.
She has requested no-contact, so for her sake, I’m willing to honour that, but it’s been really difficult for me as I’ve been left with so many questions unanswered. (Was that the only reason? Why couldn’t we talk it through?)
In all honesty, I don’t even remember clicking or looking at a link. I just told her I was curious because I thought owning up to a mistake would be better than just saying I didn’t do it. I would never do anything to harm her. I don’t want to diminish her feelings and how she feels about the situation, but I think it’s a slight overreaction for a two-year relationship.
To make it clear, on the day she broke up with me, I asked if she was thinking about it before this incident or anything, and she replied, “No, this was it”. So I doubt that there was any other reason
As a side note, she found out how to do this through a TikTok video in which a girl broke up with her boyfriend because she found 87 Onlyfans links in his clicked links history.
It’s been a few days and I haven’t been able to wrap my head around it, I would never do anything to try and hurt her, and I’m really regretful as to what I did and I wish I could take it all back. (Although I do think sometimes that I really didn’t do anything - I swear on every living being that day didn’t do anything with that link)
During this time off (about a week), I decided that I wanted to talk to her about it and that this relationship was worth fighting for. I don’t think that this should be the thing to end without at least a conversation to try and remediate it. However, I completely understand that she is still probably in an emotionally heightened state, and so I don't really want to make anything worse. So I'm questioning how long to wait until I talk to her, at least to get some answers. I know that I don't want to say "sorry" as I'm not sure that I did anything wrong, but I also don't want to diminish her feelings towards this topic, as telling her "you're overreacting" might not end well. Not sure what to say, Any advice?
TL;DR: My (20M) girlfriend (21F) of almost two years broke up with me after finding three OnlyFans links in my Instagram clicked links history. She felt objectified and cheated on, even though I didn't pay for or sign up for anything. Despite my offer to show her proof, she requested no contact. I regret the situation and want to fight for the relationship but don't know how or when to approach her. Any advice?

I've (23,F) been dating my bf(35,M) for almost a year and friends with the flatmate (21,M) for almost four. Living together for 2 years.
My boyfriend used to stay 2-3 nights but would drop by almost every night for 10-20 mins to hug me, kiss me and then leave. My flatmate and boyfriend got to know each other during this past year and they normally get along well. We even went on a vacation as a trio, just a month ago.
So around 3 months ago my flatmate voiced some issues about my boyfriend staying so often. I said it's okay, i can do 2 nights instead. Mind you, those nights start after 11 as we both work and end before 4-5 p.m. the next day. I didn't create any problems, i even told him it's good he said this, maybe it would become the reason he takes me out on more dates as he wouldn't be seeing me as often. So the flatmate then said, "i also don't like him dropping by. Even if it's for five minutes, i feel like i see him everyday and i feel like this isn't my house when i see a third person so often."
I said okay. No more hugs at the doorstep. I was honestly disappointed but i knew i had to comply in order to keep my peace at home.
Still the situation affected my own peace. I no longer had a home where i could just casually call my boyfriend to, even if it's for ten minutes. We had a strict schedule. One day, he couldn't come so we postponed to next day without letting the apartment manager ahem sorry, the flatmate know. But it was still 2 days within the same week, not three. Not at all to my surprise, the flatmate again told me how bothered he was that he wasn't informed. All i did was say sorry and promise I'll inform him next time there's a change.
Fast forward to last week, boyfriend and i were out of town for some important stuff but then we realized our day trip was going to take longer he had to go back home as he had work. Before he left, he had parked his motorcycle in front of my apartment building (he lives too far away and it was way more convenient to do so, for retrieving it later). Then he knocked on my door to ask whoever was at home to hand him his helmet, which we had left in my bedroom. The person (whoever opened the door) ended up telling him they don't know where it is, so he went to my room to get it. While he was there, he noticed that the cats were hungry and their litterbox was stinky, so he took care of that too and left immediately after. In summary, i was having a very hard time out of town and he was retrieving his helmet and helping me out however he could, as he should.
And tonight we came back home extremely tired. We both have not slept a decent night's sleep for the past 5 days. He has pulled 3 all-nighters and i, 2. I told him to come rest a bit in the kitchen and then he could leave. We spent half an hour in the kitchen, chatted to my flatmate and our friend who has been staying with us. And then bf left. I was then immediately asked this question: "How did your boyfriend enter the apartment that day?"
I was confused because i remember him mentioning that one of those two had opened the door for him. I said "I'm not sure". The flatmate said "well i did not open the door. Then the other friend said "neither did i.. actually, i just don't remember opening the door".
I called bf to confirm. He said it was the other friend who opened the door. I hung up the phone and told them that. The friend just replied "i... Don't remember. I'm not sure".
I was still confused by this question. My boyfriend doesn't have a key. So it must be one of those two who opened the door for him. And what kind of a question is that? Why would you even ask that? All i knew was that the room was becoming very tense.
I asked "what's wrong?" To which the flatmate replied, "We both did not open the door. He came inside somehow. Did he have your keys?"
I explained over and over that i had given my keys to the friend before leaving, and i have never given the bf any keys. We only have two, one is always on the flatmate and other one is mine. I genuinely thought they were joking so i attempted to break the ice by saying "well looks like bf is secretly a ghost!". The attempt did not work, they were both dead serious.
Then i asked "are you implying that my boyfriend got another key made behind my back?" They said "why not". I mean respectfully sir, you shouldn't be going on vacations with the people who you believe have the potential to break into your home and commit a literal crime. What i mean is, these people both know my boyfriend very well, and they know he's not that kind of person.
Well after this they both looked at me like i was hiding things. They said "well we don't know who opened the door" to which i replied "well that is a you problem, you probably should know whether you've opened a door or not".
The flatmate also added that he was again bothered that noone let him know the boyfriend was coming. And the fact that he was here when i wasn't. I mean... He was just taking back his helmet and cleaning cat litter for heaven's sake. Not like he sat in front of tv with a beer. And it was early morning, he had not slept for two days straight, just come back from a 7 hour trip, and just wanted to take his helmet so that he could go to work. He couldn't let me know because i was sleeping, 7 hours away from him.
I've lived with actually toxic situations before, but for this one i don't know what to think. Am i even slightly right? Or am i fucked? Should i move? How can i approach this situation? Someone please give me some advice, right now I'm very much sleep deprived and can't think but i feel like this kind of accusation should probably make me angry.
TL&DR: i was out of town, my flatmate and another friend were home. My boyfriend stopped by for something and the other friend opened the door. Now that friend says she doesn't remember whether she opened the door or not, and they accuse me of giving my boyfriend a spare key (or him making another key for himself)

Lol, I thought this would be funny to write about as a first silly little post as it is the most interesting thing in my life. (Don’t mind any typos)
First of all, to anyone who wants to tell me to stop or get over it or give me any valid reasonable and rational advice,I will not listen so don’t bother.
As these stories go, I 15(f) in love with English teacher 26(f). I’m obsessed with her, and have been for almost msot 2 years, it would have been longer if she had come into my life sooner.
I’m not a love at first sight person, so it took a while for it to come about. And iv always had problems with getting violently obsessed with things, I believe it’s some kind of coping mechanism, you know? If I don’t have something to live for then I fall in love with something, subconsciously of course. First it was cartoon characters then celebrity’s and the for the first time a real person who I know in real life! (Except she’s my teacher and she’s 26) but also the first woman iv ever fallen for (iv always known Im pan so it wasn’t a shock really). I think another HUGE reason I love her is because I don’t have a mother, she was abusive, druggy, alcoholic yadi-yadi-yada, and so I don’t live with her and I don’t like her and she isn’t there for me, and so I meet a kind female adult who I look up to? Obviously I get attached and I see her as a mother figure. I really do, I want to be just like her, I want to make her proud, I seek her validation, i want to fuck her. You know, regular motherly things!
The first day I met her, first day of year 10. From the second she walked into the class I felt her energy and her vibes and I had that feeling where you instantly like someone and want to be friends with them and think they are super cool. Now, she is not hot, like Obviously to me me right now in this moment she’s the most beautiful and pretty person iv ever seen she’s so cute and hot and all that, but Obviously that’s because I’m obsessed with her everything about her is great, but she’s the kind of ugly that when she first walked into the class people snickered.
She has a rash on her chin, a noticeable moustache, she looks at least 30 despite being much younger, her eyes are creepy looking and small, her skin is really red and dry and way too textured, she does weird ugly facial expressions, she has a big nose, her hair is never brushed and always greasy, she has really small eyelashes blah blah blah.. (she obviously has some really nice features as well, but I’m trying to prove i don’t like her for her looks)
Now In her defence I think they were laughing because she has the hugest ass iv seen in my entire life, not cuz of her face. (She wears really tight leggings everyday) But, she is overweight and a lot of people bring her down cuz of it but that has nothing to do with any of it for me obviously, and I obviously didn’t laugh when she walked in.
The point is, I instantly liked her and her personality, she has that school mum vibe, she’s witty she’s confident she’s loud, she’s funny, she’s so weird (like she does and says the weirdest stuff, she’ll start dancing out of no where with no warning, she shortens words all the time and then says them three times like: “fab fab fab” she has just the weirdest tendencies and mannerisms it’s insane), shes always so exited and jolly, she’s like a ball of sunshine yet at the same time she’s so sassy and passive aggressive, when I’m older I wanna be just like her you know!
And that’s how I felt for a long time, I would just enjoy her lessons because of the energy and vibes she’d bring! She makes everything so much fun just by being there, she’s also a drama teacher so she’s great at getting a crowd going and stuff. But it seemed no one else liked her, they either fat shamed her, or said she was a bitch, or found her annoying.
They aren’t wrong she is all of those things, but she’s only a bitch to you if you don’t respect her and then she’s passive aggressive and makes your time in her class hell, and as her favourite student who kissed her ass everyday it was fun for me to watch people get roasted by her and never have to worry about it. She is annoying to a lot of people because she hypes everyone up, and she’s loud and obnoxious and confident, she laughs at her own jokes and she’s giggly and she does stupid accents, she’s the walking talking definition of “QUIRKY” and so 15 year olds find her incredibly cringey and jarring. But as an immature individual my self I found her energy like something I have never seen anyone have so i from the first day thought she was my favourite teacher ever!
I often take the role of like comic relief when it comes to my friends so I often make the joke myself, and once I felt this admiration for my English teacher, and this giddy happy feeling in me when I saw her, I thought it would be a great idea to pretend/ hint to having a crush on her to my friends as a joke so they can make fun of me. It was small things like “oh my english teacher! … oh.. I liiiiikkkee herrrrrrrr~!” Id day when people mention her, no one caught onto the joke for a couple months until one day, after a holiday I had dyed my hair and she walked past me and she complimented it, I thanked her and INSTANTLY MY HEART WAS POUNDING AND I GOT ALL GIGGLING, my friend was next to me and found it funny obviously. And then the more I went to her lessons I couldn’t stop getting all sweaty and nervous around her, and every time she’d do something cute, like squeal when she’s frustrated and make weird noises or do a fake accent, or tell a joke I’d feel so unbelievably happy, and I couldn’t stop talking and thinking about her, but Eveytime I’d think about her or look at her id get a huge ick of like.. but ewww she’s so not hot! I can NOT be in love with THAT.
By summer I was still feeling this Same way, one day she wore a dress and like the dopey idiot she is, she lifted her leg and from where I sat I saw her panties. I WAS DISGUSTED, and looked away. And then looked back.. but then looked away.. and then looked back.. and then looked away.. (and did it a couple more times) but I felt sick in my stomach the whole time! It was not a hot thing at the time.
Then the year ends and it’s the summer holiday, (now up until this point I was quite caught up with my David walliams obsession. yes the 56 year old.. and so I didn’t really care about her all that much. On the first day back, before school started I went to a birthday party and I saw her walking outside of the school, when I saw her my heat was beating so fast, i hadn’t seen her in 6 weeks and I was not expecting to see her then, I said hi to her and i couldn’t stop thinking about that moment so intensely, and every thought I had about her being ugly didn’t matter to me, it’s not like I forgot about it, I know what she looks like, but I just think everything about her is so beautiful, it’s part of her and so its perfect.
That feeling got worse and worse as the year went by, every time i see her I shake, i sweat, I have panic attack like symptoms, but I feel so happy, like manic, I am overwhelmed, I want to punch things, I want to scream.
Then we get to the part where to silence this obsession I did regrettable and wierd things that she will never know about, some of the despicable things iv done in “the name of love” for her include:
Eating her hair Licking her spit of the table Kissing her chair when she leaves the room Following her around school Drawing her Writing poems about her Writing songs about her Making edits of her Taking photos of her Recording her voice when she talks to me Stealing her trash Licking her pens Making AI chat bots with her personality Making a bingo game about her (that one is just funny, and all my friends played it too, during her lessons lol)
And many other things I won’t mention. Obviously I’m not proud of any of this, and I didn’t really need to do it, some of it I did “as a joke” for my friends, some of them I did just because I could.. but the recording her voice one is essential! Anytime we’d have a heart felt convo I’d record it so I can listen to it if I ever loose the will to live (surprisingly frequently).
Now our relationship as student and teacher was/is very good.
We’ve had some lovely moments, she told me she cared about me outside of the classroom.
A personal favourite of mine: One time she was marking my work and it was just us in the classroom and I rested my head on her shoulder as she was going through it with me, and she looked down at me and she smiled and then we stayed like that for ages while she marked my work.
All my friends said I was delusional and that she probably hates me, but she has a huge ego and i believe she likes to keep me around to give it a boost every now and then.
I wore a matching outfit with her once (on accident) and she was very happy about it
Anytime I’d ask her what I can do to improve my grade she’s say to me “oh no! But you’re doing really well! I thought you did great!”
She’d never get mad at me or shout at me for anything, if we are doing a one between two activity she’d give me the only extra sheet in the class
I asked her to sit at the front to her because I “concentrate better at the front” (i only asked cuz i wanted to sit closer to her) she gave me a sly smirk and then the next lesson she moved me to the back of the class, and also moved her self to the back of the class.
We took a selfie together and the whole time she was giggling, I gave her a Christmas card, she lets me follow her around the school, she gave my friends dirty looks when they were being mean to me
I sent her stupid emails of pictures of capybaras (it was an inside joke between us) and she responded with a way to enthusiastic response for such a simple image lol!
I sand “you belong with me” by TS and she stood in the crown and when it got to the “you belong with me” bit I pointed at her and she pointed back! Singing the words back to me
Oh, and let us not forget the amount of eye contact. I never look people in the eye, one of my first exes I barely ever looked into their eyes all the time I knew them, I just suck at eye contact. Until I met her, since I’m so insecure about her forgetting me or loosing me or something I often stare at her when she’s teaching to make sure that she doesn’t forget me. And some how in the last couple of months she stares at me as well.
Anytime she tells a joke she looks straight at me to see how I respond (always with giggles even when it’s the lamest thing iv ever heard. It’s often not funny at all.) and the entire time shes teaching the lessons I will stare at her. IN HER EYES. Like, I’ll often smile calmly, but if she hasn’t looked at me in like 4 minutes then I’ll stare deeper, but she usually looks into my eyes and hold it for a while sometimes she’ll even smile at me and then stutter and forget what she’s saying before looking away and continuing. She’ll stare deeply into my eyes, throughout the lesson, and I also always catch her looking at me first.
Once she was helping me with my work, she got really close to me, and she stared into my eyes and then I see her getting small glances at my lips (with this one I may be a little delusional) she leaned in and she kept getting confused. Like, she yaps a lot, and a lot very loudly. So it was odd for her to be standing there her arm touching mine talking to me and being like “…. Um-.. heh-.. where was i..” and she flicks through my paper and then looks back at me and goes silent and then swallows and then looks down and then flips through it again and then says something small and short followed by more silence.
I also have a theory shes on drugs, for many reasons but one time I needed her to take a photo of my book, and she was acting so weird, tired but like really like dizzy and loopy and breathless. And she went to take a photo of my book, and got behind me and she leaned into my book, and I felt her heavy loud breath on my neck as her stray hairs were tickling the side of my face and her shoulder was touching my back, she she just stood there and stared at my book for ages until i was like “um so.. you can.. take a photo or something..” and then she slowly did it hahahaha!
Obviously it’s now exam time and so school is basically over and I have no more lessons, so I didn’t go into depth about how much she means to me as a person but to sum it up into one sentence; I would want to seriously kill my self with out her in my life.
And so the thing I had been fearing for so long, the last English lesson, the last time seeing my dear beloved. Well obviously it’s life or death so I have to tell her how I feel and get her to stay in contact with me.
The last lesson ends I go up to her after a morning of: pissing my self, shitting my self, throwing up in my mouth, constantly putting on perfume, checking my hair and chewing the mintiest of gums. And I start my speech, I won’t go into it but I told her how I felt about her (minus the being in love bit I played it off as platonic duh, im not fully stupid).
I told her that she means so much to me, and she’s (one of) my favourite people in the world (that’s a white lie she’s my only favourite) I can’t go on with out her, I need her, iv felt this way since the first lesson, your so fun, you mean so much to me! I cant loose you, I don’t know what I would do with out you!!!!
I cried in her arms as she hugged me! And i didnt even need to ask she suggested we could stay in contact, in-fact all i had said was “I’ll miss you so much :(“ and she already suggested we stay in contact, but Obviosuly I still did the whole speech cuz at some point she needed to know. Her response was basically that she already knew, but she was very pleased to hear it, and everything is going to be perfectly okay.
She said we can stay in contact (through email, cuz apparently there is a “legal thing unfortunately” stopping her from giving me her number (yes I did ask for her number, but in a total no homo way.)
She said I can talk to her anytime about anything as much as I like, and that’s good enough for me!
I also gave her a drawing I did of her and me together which was cute, her response to that was “oh very cool! she walks over. she takes it in her hands, very excited to see it. This really throws her confidence off, she’s really not expecting this. OH THIS IS AMAIZING! her voice cracks THANK YOU SOOOO MUCH! this is lovely! thank you, this is soo good! oh-muh-gud it’s SO good! oww I love it! thank you.. I’m wearing the same top as well, how fun~.. HOW FUN!!!! how fun!! … she takes it and puts it in her bag i will prop this up, on my desk! wicked wicked awesome!” (I recorded her reaction so that’s how you know it’s word for word)
In conclusion, im creepily obsessed and its a problem, but I don’t really regret anything cuz it’s all gotten me to this point where I can talk to her when ever I want and that’s all I could ever ask her. Yes I want to fuck her, but that’s not important to me I just need her in my life, she’s my world she’s my reason of living, and I’m so happy things are this way! I’m doing my exams now so I get to see her everyday when I come into school (by see her I mean wait outside the staff room so I can catch a glimpse of her knee). I’m also glad I’m not in her lessons anymore cuz I’d always get so twitchy around her, anytime she’d be near me and I’d be trying my best not to lunge at her, when I see her my mouth waters I just wanna grab her and kiss her all over! Eeek! She’s adorableeeee!
I love herrrrr ❤️❤️❤️

Goal: Create a heartfelt animated music video Song: TheFatRat - Still Here With You Tone: Happy, Sad, Sweet, Touching, Moving, Inspiring, Beautiful, Spiritual Style: 2D cute cartoon/anime Length: About two and a half minutes to fit the song (more is fine, adding a short intro/outro to fit the story is welcome) Deadline: 2 Months (flexible) Budget: $3,000 (flexible)
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Sorry if the deadline/budget seems unreasonable. I am very flexible on both and am more than willing to work with someone on a fair price.
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I would like to have a music video created for my fiancée, Emily, starring her and one of our cats, Fawkes, who we helped cross the rainbow bridge in February 2023. We always get the feeling he's still here with us, watching over us, spreading his love and joy. I want to imagine what that would look like if it were indeed true. On a spiritual level, they were/are truly soulmates, and I want to create something really special for her to remember him by. These last few years have been really tough for her, and we have been abandoned/betrayed by some friends and family mainly due to drama around our caring for Fawkes.
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I am looking for someone passionate who truly wants to help me make this a reality. I will do everything in my power to get whatever you need to make this work. This is probably way too much info, but I'm trying to get my thoughts out if it can help the creative process for anyone. If you're interested, please send me a message.
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Factoids:

• Me: 33M
• Emily: 34F
• Emily and Fawkes slept on the couch together during his sickness (he would always lay on her, face to face)
• Emily likes to paint as a hobby (shapes, flowers, birds, owls)
• Emily likes to play PC games (Overwatch, World of Warcraft)
• Emily is usually up at night while I'm asleep
• Emily has been free of work since before he got sick
• I work during the day, Emily is at home alone (she does not drive)
• We still randomly find his fur on our clothes that have been washed multiple times since he passed. It makes us smile and think of it as a gift from him.
• Fawkes and Freyja didn't get along unsupervised, so we kept them separated when we slept or had to go somewhere
• Freyja sometimes acts like Fawkes did (belly rubs and lots of snuggles). We feel as though it's Fawkes visiting us through her.

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Thoughts, ideas, notes:

• Possibly starting from when we are at/leaving the vet when we said goodbye
• Fawkes depicted as an angel/spirit cat
• Centered around Fawkes and Emily
• Emily doing day-to-day things like watching TV, painting, playing games, chores
• Emily looking at pictures and feeling sad
• Emily feeling hopeless and alone
• Freyja and I can be part of making her feel better sometimes
• I go to work and she's all alone
• Fawkes finding ways to cheer up/help Emily, somehow interacting with things around her
• I want it to express feelings of sadness at points but also happiness and joy
• Locations closely based on actual places we went/live (I can provide pictures of where we live or addresses of locations for Google Maps for satellite views)
• Ending: I would like to show Fawkes with her family dog (who passed away in September 2021) and her grandmother (who passed away in January 2024), all happy together and watching over Emily

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backstory below
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Beginning:
Fawkes came into our lives in July 2017 from the streets after his previous owners were taken away from him a few weeks prior. We immediately brought him to the vet to get checked and tested for anything. The vet found that he was chipped and five years old. As a result, they couldn't really do much besides try to contact the previous owners. We took him home and kept him separated from our other cat, Freyja, since we did not know if he could spread anything to her. He was pretty lethargic, hardly eating, and couldn't really keep much down. We honestly thought we would wake up the next morning and he wouldn't be with us anymore. Luckily, that was not the case.
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He wasn't doing so well the next day, so we called the vet and they had us come in again. Since the previous day, he went from over seven pounds down to about six and a half pounds. Our vet decided it was necessary to medically intervene or he was likely going to die. They hospitalized him on the spot and started giving him subcutaneous (SQ) fluids and other medications to help with his nausea and stimulate his appetite. We left him under the care of the vet and all we could do was wait to hear back. He pulled through like a champ. He was eating, moving, jumping, playing, snuggling, and loving life. It was as if he was reborn, like a phoenix from the ashes, so we named him "Fawkes" after the phoenix from Harry Potter.
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Over the following years, Fawkes and Emily became pretty much inseparable. He was such a lovebug and radiated that classic "orange cat energy" wherever he went. If he wanted to get into something, he'd either find a way or keep trying until we could stop him. He absolutely LOVED belly rubs, and not once was it ever a trap (unless you felt "trapped" rubbing his belly for hours). In all the time we had him, he never hissed at, scratched, or bit (non-playfully) anyone. He just wanted to love everything and everyone he met. He didn't have any enemies in his eyes, just others who may not have cared for the level of love and joy he wanted to share.
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Later:
Fawkes was diagnosed with stage 1 chronic kidney disease (CKD) in October 2021, which quickly progressed to stage 3 by early 2022. We were giving him medicine a few times a day, SQ fluids every couple of days, and going to the vet every other week to have his levels checked. He became a regular at the vet and even a few employees confessed to taking breaks just to go snuggle him because they loved him so much. We almost said goodbye to him in May 2022, as his symptoms were worsening and he no longer wanted to eat. He was a fighter, though, and told us he wasn't done fighting yet by finally eating on his own just as we were trying to make that difficult decision. We took him to the Animal Emergency and Referral Center (AERC) that night.
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The vet told us that he had developed anemia and our only options were either to take him home and start end-of-life care or do a blood transfusion (which might not even work) and keep him hospitalized for a few days to be monitored. We opted for the blood transfusion. The procedure went well and we were able to come and visit him a day later, though they still had to keep him for another day or two just to be safe. We were also able to have his case looked at by a specialist, and they adjusted his meds to better suit his needs. They were estimating he maybe had a few weeks to a month or so before we ended up back where we were before the transfusion. We were now giving him less medicine a few times a day, SQ fluids every night, and going on walks through our apartment building every night before bed.
​
A few weeks became a few months, and he seemed to be doing even better than he was all of 2022 before his transfusion. We would take him on trips to Petco every week or so, so he could walk around and meet new friends. We would bring him to the park while we played Pokémon GO, even if we ended up just sitting in the car. Starting around September 2022, my boss even let me bring him to work with me on days he wanted me in the office. Vet appointments were few and far between, sometimes a couple of months apart. This pretty much continued all the way into February 2023 until we started to notice more significant symptoms again, and his CKD values were getting much worse. He didn't want to eat, he was hiding more, and he would often seek comfort by laying in his litterbox. We could tell our little warrior was ready to be done fighting.
​
Goodbye:
On the night of Tuesday, February 14th, 2023, Valentine's Day, we decided we couldn't make him fight for us any longer. We called our vet and made an appointment for Thursday, February 16th, 2023. We spent the whole day together on Wednesday, February 15th, 2023, snuggling on the couch and finished with our nightly routine of SQ fluids and a walk. We all spent the night together on the couch, staying awake as long as we could. On Thursday, February 16th, 2023, we brought Fawkes to the vet, and he was excited to walk around and explore the new space for a short while before needing a rest. It was nice to see him perk up and act like how we remembered him to be. The doctors took him away to be prepped and brought him back after a short while. We were petting him, kissing him, and told him he was a good boy and how much we loved him as he peacefully passed. We left there with the heaviest pet carrier ever. An empty one.

We all make deals everyday... Small exchanges with one another.
In my case it was the biggest exchange I've ever made... Thinking back to the hotel stays while JE tortured and used hypnosis on me, it was getting worse and worse for me physically and mentally. He would eventually be figured out bc I was very rebellious and strong.
So how does one learn to really control you? To have power over you? At that point he looked at me bc I wouldn't relent..and he said either you forget him or we will kill him. Which is it going to be?
And so I relinquished all my power and any control I had bc I knew he and the others he would end up manipulating would do it.
Love is strange like that. I wrote a letter in the twin flames subreddit... It's were I finally stop fighting JE. And I know it's over for me. It's when I tilt my head back and pray to Gd that I remember you... That whatever happens I would remember the love I have for you.
And so, it wasn't easy to make a decision like that. I loved you so much. I couldn't bear the thought that all of this was my fault bc you sought justice for me bc of the gang rape. You should live bc you did nothing wrong, but try and bring justice. And so, it's how it went. It's why I never knew who you were after some time. I lost all conscious awareness. I chose your life over my own... I lost my essence and inner light that day... I was to live as a dead person never fully knowing love...bc you were the definition of love... The definition of what was lost from my conscious awareness.
Never doubt how much you meant to me. We all have regrets in life... This was never one of them...
And sometimes you have to wonder about the circles youre apart of... I had just lost an ex boyfriend a year prior to meeting you. And I learned that life is such a gift given to us...
Thinking back about why certain things happen in the circles of life...
Almost like life turned around and asked... Do you really think life is to be valued and protected at all cost or are you lying? And I answered...
I think this is the last bit of it all...
Dearest person I will always appreciate you and I hope you're doing well...
💕

We all make deals everyday... Small exchanges with one another.
In my case it was the biggest exchange I've ever made... Thinking back to the hotel stays while JE tortured and used hypnosis on me, it was getting worse and worse for me physically and mentally. He would eventually be figured out bc I was very rebellious and strong.
So how does one learn to really control you? To have power over you? At that point he looked at me bc I wouldn't relent..and he said either you forget him or we will kill him. Which is it going to be?
And so I relinquished all my power and any control I had bc I knew he and the others he would end up manipulating would do it.
Love is strange like that. I wrote a letter in the twin flames subreddit... It's were I finally stop fighting JE. And I know it's over for me. It's when I tilt my head back and pray to Gd that I remember you... That whatever happens I would remember the love I have for you.
And so, it wasn't easy to make a decision like that. I loved you so much. I couldn't bear the thought that all of this was my fault bc you sought justice for me bc of the gang rape. You should live bc you did nothing wrong, but try and bring justice. And so, it's how it went. It's why I never knew who you were after some time. I lost all conscious awareness. I chose your life over my own... I lost my essence and inner light that day... I was to live as a dead person never fully knowing love...bc you were the definition of love... The definition of what was lost from my conscious awareness.
Never doubt how much you meant to me. We all have regrets in life... This was never one of them...
And sometimes you have to wonder about the circles youre apart of... I had just lost an ex boyfriend a year prior to meeting you. And I learned that life is such a gift given to us...
Thinking back about why certain things happen in the circles of life...
Almost like life turned around and asked... Do you really think life is to be valued and protected at all cost or are you lying? And I answered...
I think this is the last bit of it all...
Dearest person I will always appreciate you and I hope you're doing well...
💕

We all make deals everyday... Small exchanges with one another.
In my case it was the biggest exchange I've ever made... Thinking back to the hotel stays while JE tortured and used hypnosis on me, it was getting worse and worse for me physically and mentally. He would eventually be figured out bc I was very rebellious and strong.
So how does one learn to really control you? To have power over you? At that point he looked at me bc I wouldn't relent..and he said either you forget him or we will kill him. Which is it going to be?
And so I relinquished all my power and any control I had bc I knew he and the others he would end up manipulating would do it.
Love is strange like that. I wrote a letter in the twin flames subreddit... It's were I finally stop fighting JE. And I know it's over for me. It's when I tilt my head back and pray to Gd that I remember you... That whatever happens I would remember the love I have for you.
And so, it wasn't easy to make a decision like that. I loved you so much. I couldn't bear the thought that all of this was my fault bc you sought justice for me bc of the gang rape. You should live bc you did nothing wrong, but try and bring justice. And so, it's how it went. It's why I never knew who you were after some time. I lost all conscious awareness. I chose your life over my own... I lost my essence and inner light that day... I was to live as a dead person never fully knowing love...bc you were the definition of love... The definition of what was lost from my conscious awareness.
Never doubt how much you meant to me. We all have regrets in life... This was never one of them...
And sometimes you have to wonder about the circles youre apart of... I had just lost an ex boyfriend a year prior to meeting you. And I learned that life is such a gift given to us...
Thinking back about why certain things happen in the circles of life...
Almost like life turned around and asked... Do you really think life is to be valued and protected at all cost or are you lying? And I answered...
I think this is the last bit of it all...
Dearest person I will always appreciate you and I hope you're doing well...
💕

~First~
Cats, Cops and C4
The Erumenta woman tries to fight even as he forces her into the cell, her natural fire flaring hot enough for his clothing to smoulder and him to mentally congratulate himself for his Undaunted Brand. It’s literally saved his fingers multiple times today.
Marlintine Spire is like many of the spires of Centris still reeling from the massive scan. Sure it had been legal, and both Living Goddesses upon the world had told everyone to calm down in their own way. But just because something is legal and endorsed by powerful figures does not make it a popular move.
“You burn any of your fellow prisoners while you’re in there and you’re getting a suppression collar.” He tells the obstinate criminal as he shoves her into the holding cell and slams the bars shut. The forcefields supplementing the metal bars flickers into place and the blast of flame she aimed at his face splashes against it without further effect. “Cute, keep it up and we won’t need a court hearing to upgrade you to a real prison.”
“He’s being serious. Stripper boy is playing at being a serious police officer.” Another criminal mocks and is subsequently ignored as Chenk leaves the area. He has other things to do.
“Ma’am.” He greets Chief Bowman as he slips by to head back out.
“Hold it human. I know your kind are endurance monsters, but you need to sit the hell down. You’ve been dragging in cult soldiers for six and a half hours straight. Your legal overtime ended a half hour ago.”
“Then keep a cell open for me as I keep bringing in more people. This needs to be quelled.” Chenk says and as he turns to keep going she grabs his belt and pulls him back.
“You need to rest.”
“The Spire is in the middle of a borderline insurrection. I can rest when it’s...” He begins to say before a sudden movement to his right makes his head snap around. Just before Vera the Takra-Takra crashes into him.
“Thanks for stalling him out Chief! Come on you goofy human!” Vera announces as she drags him down the hallway and into Linda’s Office. She tosses him onto the couch and then pounces onto him and pins him.
“Really?” Chenk asks.
“Yes really. You need to calm down. And I found a way to force it.” Linda states.
“But the Spire is...”
“You are one officer. Supersoldier on loan to the station or not, you’re still only one officer. The structural integrity of this spire only depends upon you when there’s a bomb threat and even then, only when it’s a chemical bomb.” Linda tells him. “Or do we have to restrict you to only being called out during a bomb threat?”
“No.” He says. “But people are still getting hurt and...”
“And they're the ones hurting themselves. Just please calm down. I know you’re skilled, but your sense of justice is just going to hurt you at this rate. Don’t want to leave a bad example for Amy now do you?” Linda teases him and Chenk groans in frustration.
“... I really should have thought things through before growing attached to that girl.”
“Oh probably, but it was adorable to see. The world crashing down on a poor little girl in over her head and then Officer Hero, Supersoldier from the blackest void of the galaxy flies in to save her.” Vera teases.
“Still, him being a supersoildier is a bit of a problem right now. Big man needs a mission, or he’s going to go nuts!” Linda notes. “Luckily! I called one of your friends on the ship. Soldier, you’re in position to requre a talking to from The Observer. However, the call is on hold, but you need to be here when it goes off.”
“That’s a dirty trick.” Chenk notes even as an Undaunted communicator is tossed at him and he catches it. It’s activated, it’s in a waiting queue and there’s no way he can go into the field now if he’s waiting for an official answer. “Very dirty.”
“Good thinking!” Vera compliments as she cuddles closer to her pinned target. Her hair spikes out in sudden shock as The Communicator then goes off to signify the call has gone through. “I jinxed it!”
“Specialist Chenk Barnabas sir!” Chenk answers the call instantly as he sits up and Vera scurries off him.
“Really? I put him on that waiting list to get him to calm down and stop working.”
“Specialist Barnabas, I’m one of numerous individuals filtering the sheer number of incoming calls to The Inevitable. You’re in the proper queue now, please state what you have been doing as a member of The Undaunted so that Observer Wu can better decide who to speak with.”
“I’m on loan to one of Marlintine Spire’s major police stations. Due to the overpopulation of Centris this means I have been acting as elite law enforcement over a population that exceeds that of many of earth’s countries.”
“I see, anything in particular that you’re doing?”
“I’m a chemical expert and accredited detective at this rate. I am the go to specialist for law enforcement when it comes to chemical explosives for a full ten percent of Centris Police Departments.”
“Any particularly interesting cases you’ve been assigned to?”
“Yes, one that is still being debated in court by none other than The Trytite Lady. It involves cloning, murder, mercenaries, numerous criminal gangs and a great deal of more nonsense such as massive prison breaks, fighting robots and Axiom effects so dangerous that even speaking about them in anything more than the most broad and general of terms on an open frequency is a punishable offence.”
“So you have seen a fair amount of what has occurred in the galaxy.”
“I’ve seen enough that I’m going to be very hard to surprise or overwhelm any longer.” Chenk says.
“Very good. I’ll just note this down. The Galaxy is absolutely insane, I’ve been fielding calls from people with like nine heads all speaking in concert and god damn lobster people and more...”
“That’s reality for you.” Chenk replies. “Always more absurd than it should be.”
“Indeed, stand by. I’m putting you into the next proper queue. It shouldn’t be more than a minute or two long.” The Assistant states and then the call shifts to simply display that he’s fourth in the queue now.
“Hunh. Faster and somehow slower than expected at the same time.” Chenk says even as Vera leans against him.
“Even when you take a break you’re still working.”
“You didn’t complain about me being an endurance monster when I planted this in you.” He says gently patting her growing stomach and she pushes him a bit in protest.
“Problem with getting the super-babies of doom is the wait for the baby.” Vera complains and he chuckles before the communicator activates again. He puts it in broadcast mode as Linda leaves her desk to sit next to him for support.
“Observer Wu I take it?” Chenk asks the Asian man who nods.
“And you are Officer and Operative Barnabas. The little summary in front of your call has my attention. Tell me, how are laws generally handled in the Centris space.”
“Centris is a massively overpopulated planet consisting of Spires and Plates. The Spires are the massive multi tiered towers that have two hundred levels each and each level holds enough people to populate any major city on Earth with ease. The lower the level on the spire the less funding, infrastructure and support it has with the bottom ten generally considered a universal slum or no man’s land. Law enforcement in those areas is nigh on impossible and the air itself has been described as thick and fetid. No natural light reaches those areas either.”
“And higher up?”
“Increasing amounts of wealth and support. To such a degree that the plates, which form an artificial ring around Centris are of such high quality that their most squalid and desperate places are at roughly the same standard of living as the middle fifty floors of a well off Spire. As you can imagine, policing all this is an outright herculean effort and every station, no matter how well funded, armed or endorsed is simply inadequate for the task.”
“What sort of crimes have you witnessed?”
“I’ve stopped terrorist conspiracies, torn down drug labs, found myself between assassins and their targets, I’ve stood in the middle of gang wars commanding people to stand down, I have tackled muggers, murderers and maniacs alike into walls and cuffed them. Not even twenty minutes ago I dragged a criminal who could light fires with her will alone into a cell, my jacket is still singed from it.”
“So the world is rife with criminality.”
“No more than any other place, there’s just so many people crammed in here that it’s constant, and that’s without the recent provocation that every single criminal organization received more or less simultaneously. Generally for every single idiot that needs a police officer to remind them why good behaviour is a good idea, there’s an entire bus full of people that didn’t even consider breaking the law.” Chenk explains.
“But when they truly commit crimes they don’t stop do they?”
“No, more resources, technology and Axiom means that if someone wants to break the rules they can break the very concept of rules. The last major case I was in before this flashfire of criminality was kicked off involved the sanctity of body and mind being shattered for the sake of mere greed by a figure so underworld infamous that for a chance to get either evidence on the person in question or ingratiate themselves to them we had an all out war break out in the station. One that if not for a quick trick, we would have lost.”
“And the trick was?”
“Switching out the prize for a disguised tracking beacon.” Chenk says and Observer Wu nods appreciatively. “I can’t credit on that though, it was The Private Stream that did that.”
“I haven’t had that fully explained to me. What is THE Private Stream?”
“I’m not the best person to explain it, but a quick summary is that it’s a shared persona for low profile work. Operative Jameson is the founder and original Private Stream, a persona that lets him go around while heavily armed and armoured while arousing no suspicion.”
Vera snorts in amusement. “Arousing... lot of girls find the aw shucks innocent routine to be arousing.”
Chenk slowly urns to her. “What?”
“You know what.”
“Maybe I don’t!”
“Maybe you do.”
“Could we focus please?” Observer Wu asks. “Now, as an Officer, are there any laws that you would find concerning about humans?”
“Yes, they’re usually location dependant thankfully. So the issue can be avoided. Furthermore there’s a lot of leeway given in laws where the traits of a species would make following the law difficult if not impossible. For example a human can generally get away carrying substances that are considered highly toxic or dangerous due to the fact that our diets contain what many people in the galaxy are nothing more than hard core poisons.”
“Hmm... Could you be more specific?”
“Well, this one won’t apply to you due to an amendment that Admiral Cistern was able to get allies to help him push through, but one of the most popular religions the galaxy over is the Gravid Faith, it has numerous denominations and variants and several of them create what’s called Arrangement Systems where men are required by law to have a hundred wives.”
“And the amendment is?”
“That if you are gainfully employed by governmental or military forces that you are exempt from the law so long as you remained employed in such a manner. You Observer Wu are the eyes of hundreds of Earth Nations meaning a government employee.” Chenk explains and he nods.
“I see. Any other exemptions?”
“Generally the Galaxy looks down on kinetic weaponry, so when it was pushed that humans wear weapons and cultural garb it was allowed through without issue. So humans are legally allowed to carry weapons like knives and pistols at almost all time without question. It’s... rather stupid in my opinion, but well it would be even more foolish for me to complain about something I’m outright benefiting from.”
“Hmm... any other laws?”
“They very much vary by location. Which are further influenced by the species of the residents, local culture, religion, political association, economic status. The name of the game is jurisdiction issues here on Centris. The local police departments all help one another, but always at the invite of the local officers who can actually confirm if what’s taking place is a crime or not in the local area.”
“Can you give an example of this working against things?”
“Alright, the easiest example is with drugs. There is no agreed on way to combat the spread of illegal narcotics. Some make the growing of the plants that produce what you want illegal. Others make the refinement of it’s fruit illegal and some make the selling of the drug illegal. So you can produce it all on the third Spire and sell it on the first two legally. You can grow the plant on the second and third spire legally, refine it on the first and third legally and that way you have a massive multi-jurisdiction drug running operation without technically breaking any law.”
“Hmm... that is a great deal to consider. I presume other such crimes can operate the same way?”
“Unfortunately yes. But that’s the problem with laws, you need to set where the boundaries are, but not make people prisoners in their own homes. There’s always a loophole.”
“Tragically yes.” Observer Wu remarks. “Now, I do need to speak to the others, but I have a few moments more. Who and what are you sitting near. The vaguely catlike woman on your right and the... generally human looking woman on your left are?”
“Linda is to my left. Partner and wife, the first actual police officer of us three. Vera is to my right. Wandering Warrior and wife. Linda is a Tret woman, they’re best considered to be humans if we evolved with Axiom helping us, a sister species to our own people. Vera is a Takra-Takra, she and her kind can shapeshift into the ferocious Warform and use it in battle. They pride their skill as Warriors and seek out stronger mates to empower the next generation.” Chenk explains before tiltiing the view down a little to show the pregnant stomach on Vera. “A work in progress.”
“I see. Congratulations. Although compared to many other Undaunted you seem a little behind.”
“I wasn’t aware it was a race.”
“Which is exactly how you lose the race!” Vera says in an amused tone.
“Indeed. Every conversation leads me to believe that I need to take an entire university degree in order to understand things. Thankfully your own is rather straight forward.”
“Really? Who are you speaking with next?”
“I haven't decided yet, but I need to speak with everyone in some way.” Observer Wu states.
“Good luck sir, I think you’ll need it.” Chenk says.
“Excuse me, is there a way to get a human to calm down and take a break? Ever since Centris was Scanned and hidden societies were exposed all over Chenk has refused to stop working. Is there any way to just get him to take a break?” Linda asks.
“It generally varies from person to person. But I would suggest guilting him. Emotional blackmail is a powerful tool.” Observer Wu says with a slight smirk.
“Traitor!” Chenk declares and there’s a chuckle from The Observer.
“Indeed. I’m afraid this call needs to finish now. Best of luck.” Observer Wu says before the call ends.
“So... we need to guilt you then? Okay!” Vera exclaims before her eyes start to water. “Don’t you wanna be there for the baby? Doesn’t she deserve a daddy?”
“Oh my god woman!”
~First~ Last

I'd originally posted in another thread, and some of the commentors ( u/one85fortunes and u/Jeciew) had asked for elaboration as to the incidents that happened in my house.
I'll try to fill in as much as possible. This will probably be ridiculously long, so strap in.
My SO and I moved into this house a little under 2 years ago. It's an average looking rancher, built in 1990. We're the second owners of the house. The original owner was an older man, who'd cared for his wife after she had a stroke. She ultimately passed away (not in the house, but in hospice) and being in his late 70's he'd decided to move to Florida. We met him briefly during one of the inspections, and he wasn't creepy or anything. Nothing in the house seemed off. No signs of satanic rituals, etc. All jokes aside, I add these details because I assume some of these questions will come up.
There was a hurricane the night we moved in. Rushing back and forth from the AirBnB to get situated with our two cats that first night was stressful to say the least. We basically throw down an air mattress, got out the litterbox, cat food, and other basics and then passed the hell out.
When I woke up the next morning my cat Oscar was dead. As he was only 7, and not knowing if a danger existed that would harm his brother Max or us, I rushed and had an autopsy done. The vet said he basically threw a clot, probably because of the stress of the move. I miss him, he was a hell of cool cat. I think he's still around - his spirit or whatever, and I am almost positive he visits and plays with Max some nights. Just seeing Max start chasing (literally nothing) around, the way they used to chase each other. I'm probably crazy but I feel better believing it.
One of the first weird things that occurred was a few weeks in. I was in my office building some shelves. An idiot proof kit, with hardware in bags numbered, you open them depending on the step you're on. I was on the last step, which involved hammering in these four feet.. each one similar to a giant thumbtack. Just big enough to keep the shelf system from scratching up the floor. I hammered in the first 3, and the 4th was just gone. I stood up, searched the room. Searched the hallway (no clue how it could have moved, I was sitting immobile on the floor but who knows). It's nowhere. I check Max, he's a Maine Coon so maybe it got stuck in his hair. After an hour of tearing apart most of the house, I give up and stack some quarters where that foot would have gone. Told my SO to keep an eye out for it. We then found it 3 days later on the top shelf of my coat closet, under a ballcap. It's about this point I should mention it's just the two of us, no one else lives in the house, at least not full time. We do have a room over the garage that one of the kids calls home when she's not in college. As this was all around early October, she was away at school.
We'd start hearing things. The amount of times (to this day) we'll rush into one of each other's rooms only to find neither of us called each other, but one of us at that time had distinctly heard someone yelling for us, well it's not even scary anymore just annoying. Maybe the entity wants me to lose some weight and get my steps in *shrug*. Other times we'll hear crashing sounds. In the early days, with boxes and things scattered and being unpacked, I figured the cat just knocked something over. I'd go check and find nothing amiss.
Lights would start being on in rooms we hadn't used. Again, we chalked a lot of this up to confusion, or carelessness. It's a new house, neither of us had our routines yet, it was all a bit of a hot, sleepless mess, and I can't always swear I didn't go into that back bedroom and maybe turn the light on while on autopilot (even though I totally didn't). I'm a big fan of horror (post history proves that) and I don't spook easily. I'm also pretty pragmatic and realistic, so I'll try to find a rational reason for most things before jumping to the paranormal and metaphysical concepts.
Eating dinner one night we heard a weird noise, and we got up to investigate to find the bathtub running at full blast. Around this time we'd also find oddities like pictures on the walls being askew. Overall things started escalating. My SO and I promised to each other, on penalty of ending the relationship, that neither was pranking the other. That pact holds to this day.
At this point in the game, I'd started looking into metaphysical things that I could do to help. I'm talking amethyst and obsidian pieces in the house, saging, stuff like that. I honestly don't believe in it, but I also don't NOT believe, so what can it hurt. It didn't really do much that I could tell. Things continued to happen.
Twice in the same day, at vastly separate times and in different bathrooms, we both experienced an incredibly loud pounding in the attic over the bathroom as we were doing our business. I assume the ghost doesn't like whatever we ate that week. My bad, homie.
The locks had been changed at this point. I started looking throughout the house, wondering if someone was phrogging. I've seen a few horror movies about it. Nothing out of the ordinary. The attic has two entrances, one needs a ladder from the hallway, and the other is through an opening in the eaves, which you can get to from the FROG (Finished Room Over Garage). I stacked things in front of that eaves door, just to make sure nothing was coming and going. I did come to the realization that the attic was FULL of stuff from the previous owner. Luggage, clothes, random stuff. I still haven't cleaned it out, so maybe something up there is tied to an entity. No clue.
I've never felt anything malicious from the entity/spirit/energy/demon/whatever. My other half is terrified of it. Came home from the store one day to find the last rites crucifix in the bedroom turned sideways and half opened. Also felt every hair on my body stand up when I went in the room. The hair-on-end happens often when activity is spiked, I can't tell if it's energy literally raising my hair, or just me being creeped out.
I went to check the aforementioned stacked items in the FROG one night to find that all the LED strips the girl had put up were blazing red. She hadn't been home in weeks and never uses that color. I was up there just a few days prior and all the lights were off.
Halloween was fun. Giving out candy, talking with the cul-de-sac neighbors. One cute kid, maybe 4 years old turns to look to his right (my garage) and says you have a goblin in your garage. We didn't have any decorations on that side of the house. I'm sure just random kids being weird kids, right?
I have a habit of being flippant, and I started talking to the entity. SO also tried it once. At this point we'd started hearing breathing in the dark sometimes. One night she's in the hall, cleaning the cat litter. She felt something behind her, heard breathing. She calmly said "I'm busy right now, please leave me alone". The feelings and sensations instantly left, then all the doors in the hallway slammed shut. We both started wearing amethyst and obsidian jewelry, just in case.
I noticed movies I'd leave up on my computer (I watch stuff while I'm working) would be playing, or finished when I know I had them paused. I thought maybe if you are a ghost you're bored af, so I spoke to the ghost and setup a dozen books in the back bedroom. A mixture of my stuff and my SO's, not knowing what the thing might be into. I'm nothing if not a gracious host. The next day one of the books was turned upside down and opened, as if being put down after being read. I kept more books out but it never happened again.
For Xmas we had 6 different mini-nativity scenes throughout the house (yes, she has a problem lol). We found various pieces from the nativity scenes moved into scenes they didn't come with. We also had these little xmas gnomes that we sat on the curtain rods, we found one sitting upright in the middle of the couch one morning, a good 12 feet away from where it was before.
One night we were sitting out front having a smoke, came inside and heard music. There was a snowglobe that was playing music. It was an old heirloom, she'd forgotten it also could wind up and make music.
A box of kleenex that we keep on the living room end table was found in the garage one day.
One night, she sends me a video while I'm out - We have a first gen Alexa, that was playing Bad Habits by Ed Sheeran. She came inside from having a smoke and recorded it blasting away. I had unplugged it earlier that day when our new toaster arrived. FYI, first gens dont' have battery backups.
Another night we came back inside to find one of our butcher knives on the kitchen floor, instead of in the knife block.
One evening while getting ready for bed I noticed an earring on my night stand, it was part of a set her grandmother had left her, the other part was buried in a box under some clothes in a drawer.
One night I woke up to hearing knocking at the front door. I could see through the glass it was a decoration we had hung outside, beating against the door. I opened the door expecting to see a storm brewing but the night was completely calm, the trees weren't even swaying. No wind whatsoever.
The previous house owners smoked in the house at one point, that much we know. Weirdly, sometimes when you go into the back bathroom it'll smell like someone is actively smoking a cigarette.
There's been a crazy amount of times we've been outside and see movement, what appears to be a person in a window out of the corner of our eye. Friends and family who visit have also noticed this kind of stuff.
Things go missing, and reappear in random places far too often.
So those are most of the big things. I'll try to pre-emptively answer the common questions.

• No, we don't have cameras inside. We've considered it. Feels like a lot of work to maybe catch something moving. Having video proof of any of this isn't going to sway a non-believer either (anything can be faked on photo/video imo). That said I do have photos and videos of some of the events (the alexa, the music box, the butcher knife).
  
• The neighbors filled me in a bit about the familial history of the home. The father worked hard, his kids were drug addict shitbags who trashed the place and partied a lot. No one died in the house that I know of, nor were there any other weird activities. Could they have gotten drunk and sacrificed a cat on a ouija board? Sure, I dunno.
  
• We considered getting the church to bless the home, but she was raised very catholic and I'm more of an agnostic mutt so I haven't jumped on board the idea. Again, I don't believe but don't NOT believe when it comes to most spirituality, mysticism and religion.
  
• I did look to see if there were any paranormal investigators nearby, and it doesn't look like there are any local ones. The activity in the house is so intermittent that I can't justify offering someone to come down when there are months that go by with nothing, then a bunch of stuff for a week straight. I thought maybe it was cyclic, tied to an event, hell even the phase of the moon, but so far I've got no clue. I also really have no interest in paying someone to investigate.
  

Last thing that might be worth mentioning, my SO is 95% positive her grandmother was a witch. The bonafide, keeps their baby teeth hidden away in a box so you can't be cursed, type witch. She often dreams of her when things start acting up in the home. It was HER jewlery mentioned before, and HER last rites crucifix. I don't know if that changes things or not, I've done some reasearch but I honestly learn more from episodes of Supernatural than what I find on the internet most days lol
If you've gotten this far thanks for reading, I'd love to hear your thoughts.