Where to find tempflow matteress

Hi all, kinda been here a while.
If uve seen my comments I've noticed I have been talking about a difficult move for a while. Well, today was a doozy and so I'm gonna rant. Did achieve something for the first time though and not super upset about that
My day started at 5:30 am where I did my weigh in, logged sleep time (just over 4 hours) had coffee, etc. My step dad was gonna take me to get the u haul and drive it while my mom took their car. Was supposed to have movers to move the big stuff, load and unload the u haul and haul down my old second floor place and up to the third at the new.
Well, they get there and bail because of the complex wide roach infestation. So, my kitty bitty 5'2 self is hauling matteresses, bed frames, box springs, futon and fouton mattress, nightstands, tables, mini deep freezer, and 2 coolers full of stuff from mini deep freezer.
Mind u I packed and prepped both lunch and supper for today, 64 oz each of ketoaid and tea. I'm moving in Texas summer heat. Didnt get loaded enough for a run until after 2 pm and the mover ditched after 9 am.
While loading I'd have to stop to drink, catch breath, cool off, and I stopped for lunch at 10:40 since I'd mostly gone without food aside from coffee and tea.
Then I had to haul stuff up without a dolly. Some neighbors took pity and helped here and there while my step dad who has a pace maker went up to get out of the heat but between him and my mom both were trying to rush me as I'm going from sore to in pain moving by myself.
Got done enough for my step dad to run after 6 pm instead of us being able to move 90% of stuff out of old place between the movers and myself by afternoon. Got help getting the last few things up from a kind neighbor.
Took a quick shower. During the unload I did heat supper up and I after took my glucose and keytone levels before supper like I always do. My glucose was 68, which is kinda low for me but not worried. My keystones were 1.4 which for me is very high since usually at most I hover around .5 mostly. My gki though, it was 2.7 and in high therapeutic keytosis.
I never aim for therapeutic because o don't really need that. I have hoshimotos and reactive hypoglycemia. I'm overweight but almost at goal. For my goals I at most need nutritional key to sis and I find thats easier for me to aim for. Never been in therapeutic before, but I'm sure its because I really did a crap ton of resistance and weight trading with all the lifting, pulling, loading, tilting, rotating, etc for the moving of big ass furniture and one large appliances.
I hurt bad, am sleeping on a fouton because I do not feel up to setting up my bed, and took some aleve with supper because I hurt. But I'm still very proud with the things I accomplished today. Most of the stuff I moved I couldn't have 2.5 years ago. I'd have pulled a muscle, had a asthma attack, soraind my ankles, wrenched a knee, etc. I physically was unable to do this just over 2 years ago. And no, I don't do heavy lifting or crap like that. I do at this time mostly some light but intense body weight resistance and walking. When I did lift, it was only 2 pound dumbbells. That and wearing 2 pound ankle/wrist weight band sets while walking or doing some of the lower body resistance stuff. So very light but kinda intense there too.
So i defiantly showed some gains today and am too pooped to poop. I most definatly will be conning out at around 10 pm at the latest instead of sometime after midnight.

Hi I am taking a trip from Vancouver island where I live across Canada for about a month this June/July. I am a student doing a geography field school in southern Ontario for about a week and like to travel and do outdoor activities.
My options are my 2011 Honda CR-Z or a 1993 long bed Chevy and both have their plusses. I also have a beater toyota van
Both chevy and Honda are dead reliable and have been well up kept so they are even there. A lot of my time will be outside where I plan on fishing, hiking etc. I also want to see a lot of the eastern cities from Thunder Bay to Halifax as I am thinking about future job opportunities. Getting a feel for what place is a good, bad or okay place to live.
With the Honda I will have to pop a tent as it’s a 2 seater and will be absolutely packed with all my belongings. This is fine at campsites or backcountry but I would need a hostel or motel in urban areas. I cannot secure my valuables either. On thé bright side it is very cheap on fuel and have ice cold ac.
The truck can use one of my many checker plate aluminium boxes which is perfect for securing valuables and can carry a lot of gear, potable water, coolers of food etc. I would be getting a canopy (dads paying for it) and sleeping in there which allows me to sleep way more comfortably with a matteress and I can stealth camp in urban areas. It’s more comfortable but has no ac and will use more gas but it’s a 4.3 v6 so not awful. If something small breaks as old vehicles do I can easily buy and repair it as it’s simple. I won’t need to find a picnic table to cook as there is a tailgate.
I also have a 1988 Toyota van I can take and sleep in but I don’t think it would love the hills as they have weak cooling systems . If something breaks it will be very hard to find parts for.
Leaning towards the Chevy despite it being 30 years old and using more gas. Anyone who’s travelled the area let me know where ac is needed and cool stops thanks for reading :)

Yesterday before going to bed I was on my phone, and then suddenly dropped it. It obviously went to the right side of where I was off the bed. I tried a quick search and couldn't find it and was like "Oh, I'll check tommorow." Today, I tried calling my own phone and it immediatly cut to voice mail. I know the phone was at like ~80% so it couldn't have been dead. The battery also couldn't have just popped out since it was an IPhone 13.
Then I decided to start searching everywhere in my room. And I mean EVERYWHERE. I took off every sheet, object under my bed, checked my mini trash can throughouly, under my desk, matteress, and everything else which wasn't even close to where I dropped it. I checked object by object clearing my room with a flashlight and everything and it hasn't been found lol. My room isn't that big either, only like 10ft x 12ft. IDK what to do about it either.
TL:DR: Did an entire FBI sweep of my room after losing it, couldn't find it. Can't call it either.

This is a followup on my post here when I was first deciding on a mattress
As I explain there, due to resources on this subreddit talking about spring types and foam densities and how it was best to avoid Sealy, Serta, etc mattresses, I had narrowed my choices down to the Denver Mattress Telluride luxury Firm and the Doctor's CHoice elite firm: The former was more expensive, but it had as tangible foam feel on the top that I liked the senation of sinking into, albiet I was concerned there wasn't quite enough support on my lower back; while latter had a quilt top that I didn't quite like the texture of as much, but it was a bit more supportive.
I obviously went with the former, and now 6 months later, I'm not sure if i'm satisfied.
For starters, my concerns about my lower back not being supported enough were warranted. I have scoliosis and other back issues, so this is important. However, when laying directly on the mattress itself, it's not too bad. What I found was that with a mattress protector and a sheet on, the issue worsened, I suspect due to the surface tension they added making me not sink into the foam as much (which also negatted the entire reason I went with the Telluride), leading to the foam not "filling in" the dip in my lower back and giving support there. I also found that with just the protector on, my shoulders and head were uncomfortable and lurched fowards, I presume due to the, again, surface tension making it so my shoulders and head don't sink into the foam, wheras my spine/torso is still heavy enough to, causing my shoulders/head to lurch fowards/up. Also using a sheet fixes this (with my spine presumbly not dipping much into the foam either, but then the sensation of sinking is entirely gone almost and it feels stiff in mostly a bad way
I was suggested to try some Matteress protectors and sheets that were Purple, Dri-tec, or Underarmor brand, or were advertised with Wicking technology, made with Spandex, Bamboo, or jersey, since those apparently stretch more and allow you to feel the surface texture of the mattress more. I tried a few, and there's more I still need to try (such as The Purple branded ones, I wasn't able to find Dri tec or Undermor from a place that allows returns), but so far I've found that the Serta Power Chill protector allows me to feel a decent amount of the foam sinking, while the tension it does add seems to give a little extra firmness and support to my lower back... however, it gets damp with sweat, which I think may be waking me up (or maybe it's me going to sleep at 4am and the light through my window coming in, i'm in a new room that has more windpows and faces the morning sun now).
Additionally, there's still times where I feel like my lower back and pelvis are sinking not just into the foam, but into the springs/bed itself, where I almost feel like my body is a shallow V or in an incline with how far down waist/lower back is sinking, and it's painful, and THIS is what is really making me want to switch the bed out. I'm not sure what causes it, but I have noticed the there is a specific spot, next to but not on the edge of the bed, where it depresses more easily, and I think it tends to happen when my pelvis or back is situated there. That IS where I was first sleeping at first, so it could just be it "wearing in" more there, but it was noticable even just within the first few nights and so far other parts of the bed even as I've slept in different spots still don't feel as depressiable, other then maybe in the past few days, and even then i'm not sure, and I don't think the mattress at the store felt like that spot anywhere on it, unless as you break in the whole bed, specific broken in spots are less noticable?
Something I've tried is to order some thin , .5 to 1inch pillow inserts to put beneath my lower back, which I've had mixed results with and need to experiment with more, but fundamentally I feel like if i'm not happy with the bed I should exchange it for another model or return it, which I can still sometime in the next week.
But i'm not sure what else to go with: I tried the Doctor's Choice again at the store and I really don't think it's intrinsically more comfortable then the Telluride. There's the Sealy(?) Silver Chill, which had the same sinking foam but with more underlying firm support which I really liked, but I'm worried about how long it will last given what i've read on this subreddit. Some of the Tempurpedic mattresses felt good, but I think many of them are much more expensive, and i'm not sure how any will feel once I get a protector and/or (Do I need both?) a sheet on them.
Additionally, I know the bed at family's places, which is a stiff traditional mattress with a 2-3 inch foam topper I think is fairly comfortable, and another traditional firmish mattress there with nothing else on it, while not as comfortable to lay down on, didn't give me back issues either. I guess my ideal mattress would have foam I can sink into, a fair amount, but for that foam to still feel stiff and for there to be good support beneath it.
So I guess a random smattering of questions are:

• Anybody have any other ideas for things I could try to resolve the issue if i'm keeping this?
  
• Suggestions on alternative quality mattresses that would be what I want? Should I reconsider the Silver Chill even if it's Sealy?
  
• Anybody have suggestions on other sheets and mattress protectors that retain more of the underlying feel of the mattress? (Does anybody know if this Purple brand sheet is the same one in [this](s://www.amazon.com/SoftStretch-Sheets-Purple-Mattress-Moisture-Wicking/dp/B08Z8N8RKK) set, or if they are different?)
  
• Does the particular "dip" spot sound like a defect or just that spot being worn in more?
  
• Does anybody think a foam topper made with stiffer memory foam (how would I tell?) might help?
  
• Is it fine to sleep directly on the bed with a mattress protector without a sheet?
  
• Should I get an even softer matteress with the understanding that sheets/protectors will add tension?
  

• [22:00:26] Leth@l_CumSh0t hey
• [22:01:04] Leth@l_CumSh0t ok so let's start
• [22:01:07] branch ?
• [22:01:21] Leth@l_CumSh0t chemistry + chemical
• [22:01:55] cg?
• [22:02:09] Leth@l_CumSh0t between 6.5 and 7
• [22:03:21] placed @ ?
• [22:03:53] Leth@l_CumSh0t Societe generale
• [22:04:49] finance?
• [22:05:07] Leth@l_CumSh0t IT
• [22:05:07] Are you moving to france?
• [22:05:13] Leth@l_CumSh0t sde profile
• [22:05:20] Leth@l_CumSh0t naa bangalore
• [22:05:25] What's SDE?
• [22:05:39] Leth@l_CumSh0t software developer
• [22:05:49] what did they ask in the interview?
• [22:06:02] What does your portfolio look like?
• [22:06:25] Leth@l_CumSh0t easy coding questions based on dsa , OS, DBMS they didnt ask OOP
• [22:08:07] Leth@l_CumSh0t i didnt say tactic i said a method
• [22:08:21] Leth@l_CumSh0t but that basically involves a lot of hard work
• [22:08:32] Any idea - what (if any) companies come for a data science profile & what do they ask in interviews
• [22:08:55] tell the method
• [22:09:43] Leth@l_CumSh0t for DS - flipkart, jio, etc .. i dont know much about the interview questions
• [22:09:55] Leth@l_CumSh0t mainly ML related projects
• [22:10:15] Leth@l_CumSh0t even some people who were aiming SDE got placed in DS profile
• [22:10:33] Leth@l_CumSh0t i will be releasing a document
• [22:10:43] Leth@l_CumSh0t at the end of this session
• [22:10:49] does cg effect IT placements for mech, if cg around 7.8, does it increase any chance or of no use?
• [22:11:07] Leth@l_CumSh0t CG is only for cutoff
• [22:11:13] Leth@l_CumSh0t it matters
• [22:11:38] Leth@l_CumSh0t for the cutoff
• [22:11:46] Leth@l_CumSh0t above 7 is best for second sem
• [22:12:52] Where was your ps2?
• [22:13:13] Leth@l_CumSh0t IDeaS SAS Company
• [22:13:22] Leth@l_CumSh0t good ps to learn new things
• [22:13:30] Leth@l_CumSh0t bad for taking job i guess
• [22:13:52] why?
• [22:14:14] did you do any cs opels?
• [22:14:31] bhaiya how did you managed coding with hectic academic schedule???
• [22:14:42] Leth@l_CumSh0t work culture and people , no one wants to go out of their comfort zone in the company so not good for job
• [22:15:03] Leth@l_CumSh0t frodo is here
• [22:15:06] Bhaiya, How is BITS culture overall? I am in 1st year
• [22:15:45] Leth@l_CumSh0t Good for people who can balance both academics and extra curricular
• [22:15:51] Leth@l_CumSh0t yes my boy
• [22:16:23] How to get a girlfriend in BITS? ( Seriously)
• [22:16:31] Leth@l_CumSh0t XD
• [22:16:37] Leth@l_CumSh0t bhai meri bani nahi kabhi
• [22:16:43] Leth@l_CumSh0t i have no idea
• [22:16:53] what are the chances of getting IT ps2 for mech guys?
• [22:17:41] Didn't that get a bit lonely for 5 years straight (Without someone to talk/share to and all that?)
• [22:17:56] what CS electives did you take?
• [22:18:07] Leth@l_CumSh0t very good chances of getting good ps if you have cg greater than 7 and even more than 6 is sufficient but to be on safer side 7 is good
• [22:18:14] reverse_hash going a bit dark here xD
• [22:18:51] Leth@l_CumSh0t no i was not lonely i had friends like mr.frodo
• [22:19:00] Lol :P (Th3_Arr0w it's actually a serious question)
• [22:19:41] Leth@l_CumSh0t i took OS, discrete but didnt take DSA, OOP
• [22:19:42] Ohk.Thanks for answering @Leth@l_CumSh0t :)
• [22:19:57] Leth@l_CumSh0t learned dbms on my own
• [22:20:04] mein bhi yahi karta tha
• [22:20:15] CheeseSandwich@Rs.29 Which club is the best in terms of overall development?
• [22:20:18] what have you put into your CV
• [22:20:31] Leth@l_CumSh0t what else did you learn?
• [22:20:36] Leth@l_CumSh0t off campus bandi bannane ke chances zaada hai XD
• [22:21:02] Leth@l_CumSh0t mostly IT projects which i did on my own and PS2
• [22:21:21] Leth@l_CumSh0t good advice for 2nd year is to not waste time in PS1
• [22:21:26] CheeseSandwich@Rs.29 Bhaiya, clubs, dept?
• [22:21:45] Leth@l_CumSh0t no clubs,dept or anything
• [22:22:01] Leth@l_CumSh0t i do play guitar
• [22:22:02] CheeseSandwich@Rs.29 Then what did you do in your 5 years here?
• [22:22:11] What CS electives did you take?
• [22:22:21] Leth@l_CumSh0t os,oop,discrete maths
• [22:22:28] hey I have a cg 6.9. done with OOP, OS, ML, CS-LOP,Multimedia Computing. doing competitive..going for ps2 in sem 1. how are the chance of placement.. Branch- ENI
• [22:22:29] no DSA?
• [22:22:37] CheeseSandwich@Rs.29 What grade in OOP?
• [22:22:50] Leth@l_CumSh0t DSA , DBMS on my own
• [22:23:01] Leth@l_CumSh0t lol grade
• [22:23:15] is it preferred to do DSA from BITS?
• [22:23:21] CheeseSandwich@Rs.29 What do you mean by lol grade?
• [22:23:23] or on my own
• [22:23:30] Leth@l_CumSh0t self study
• [22:24:05] but wouldn't it be better if i have DSA on my course sheet?
• [22:24:11] Leth@l_Cumshot my question please
• [22:24:17] CheeseSandwich@Rs.29 How to learn guitar?
• [22:24:39] Leth@l_CumSh0t Dora_the_rand your branch is good ,cg too , very good chances of getting placed , keep doing the competitve
• [22:24:55] Leth@l_CumSh0t you will get placed in a very good company
• [22:25:19] Leth@l_CumSh0t dont waste time in PS2
• [22:25:29] should i try for ppo?
• [22:26:10] CheeseSandwich@Rs.29 .
• [22:26:24] how did you come to be a DC Operator ?
• [22:26:26] Leth@l_CumSh0t try for ppo but make sure you are doing the cp sometimes end me cut jaata hai company me
• [22:26:30] I have strong profile in marketing ..so some people suggested me that too.. but got to know not much companies come
• [22:26:51] cp?
• [22:27:02] oh competitive..
• [22:27:02] campus placements
• [22:27:15] My branch is Chemical, CG is 8.8, I have no interest in coding but my parents want me to get placed on a 25lpa package. Please tell me what to do. I am very depressed
• [22:27:21] Leth@l_CumSh0t bhai competitive prog... XD
• [22:27:22] yaa i m doing that. kismat chutiya hai kaafi ... not relying on ppo for sure
• [22:27:35] how did you come to be a DC Operator ?
• [22:27:59] IT probably.
• [22:28:13] Lol so much info disclosed
• [22:28:18] Where can I find a mentor?
• [22:28:25] Can I come to your room?
• [22:28:43] I am not sure as with this cg senior told me that wont be getting top ps.. so less chances also... ppo changes everyyear
• [22:28:45] have you done any extra internship than PS1 and PS2
• [22:29:23] Can I?
• [22:29:34] Leth@l_CumSh0t no extra internships i still regret not doing other than ps2 and ps1
• [22:29:53] Can you answer my question?
• [22:29:54] apart from ps2 i have done 4 internships ..not related to IT or electronics. It's just related to my stuff that I am doing all the times
• [22:30:18] MyNames'sJeff yaa sure you can come
• [22:30:19] sorry ps1
• [22:30:43] Hey there Lethal you
• [22:30:45] Leth@l_CumSh0t i m not the best guy for marketing but i know some people
• [22:30:49] Leth@l_CumSh0t 18 LPA
• [22:30:57] grt.
• [22:31:03] can i meet you in person?
• [22:31:13] Bhaiya, How lethal is your cumShot?
• [22:31:32] Nice
• [22:31:35] Leth@l_CumSh0t last time i checked i burnt hole in my matteress
• [22:31:35] and any idea as to how much in hand will you get out of that 18lpa?
• [22:31:52] Can I get that burnt mattress?
• [22:31:54] Leth@l_CumSh0t 16.5 lpa
• [22:31:56] Leth@l_CumSh0t in hand
• [22:32:09] Leth@l_CumSh0t haa bhai le jaa aake
• [22:32:16] Room number?
• [22:32:24] lethal bro..can i meet you.
• [22:32:30] since when did you started doing competitive coding?
• [22:32:40] But I live in Meera. I cannot get in your hostel by the rules I checked last time.
• [22:32:56] Leth@l_CumSh0t so stay there
• [22:33:33] bhaiya why did you take chemical as dual in firstyear. Someone told me that you were getting higher branches
• [22:33:33] Leth@l_CumSh0t very creative
• [22:34:05] I have seen a lot of seniors having their past performances in olympiads or competitive exams in their CVs
• [22:34:05] since when did you started doing competitive coding?
• [22:34:19] Leth@l_CumSh0t i started in 3-1
• [22:34:23] Is it a big plus or something to worry about ?
• [22:34:31] Leth@l_CumSh0t but sometimes i just leave it
• [22:34:38] Leth@l_CumSh0t for month or two
• [22:34:42] is it better to take chemcial if we want to focus on coding and not getting cs as dual ?
• [22:34:52] Leth@l_CumSh0t but in 4th year and in my ps i was regular
• [22:36:23] What is the best place to start competitive
• [22:36:40] apart from competitive coding, what else should one know. I mean that ki what job will I do in the company? My dual is mech.
• [22:36:45] JonSnow > on a pc i guess
• [22:36:49] where should i apply for internship in my summer after 3rd year ??
• [22:37:21] How does the fifth year feel like with a considerable part of the batch having already graduated ?
• [22:37:34] Leth@l_CumSh0t from the placement point of view start on geeksforgeeks platform
• [22:37:52] apart from competitive coding, what else should one know. I mean that ki what job will I do in the company? My dual is mech. do i need to have any devlopmental skills, OS or any other IT related thing?
• [22:37:55] Leth@l_CumSh0t from there move to interviewbit
• [22:38:19] ok thanks Leth@l_CumSh0t
• [22:38:29] Leth@l_CumSh0t study OS OOP DBMS and networking(if possible)
• [22:38:49] and what is the scope for ML during campus placements?
• [22:39:10] bhaiya howwas your ps 1
• [22:40:27] Leth@l_CumSh0t ML ka scope is very good, a lot of companies came with the profile which demanded ML
• [22:41:02] Leth@l_CumSh0t but do cp even if your profile is ML sometimes they ask coding questions for DS profile
• [22:41:22] Isn't PS1 paisa pheko A lelo lol?
• [22:41:26] Leth@l_CumSh0t few companies ask ML model questions
• [22:41:36] Leth@l_CumSh0t their test is like 3 hour
• [22:41:42] Leth@l_CumSh0t a proper ML test
• [22:41:52] Oh... ok!
• [22:42:05] for mech dualites cg > 7.5, focussing on IT,developing skills and let cg fall /not let cg reduce?
• [22:42:08] Leth@l_CumSh0t JonSnow i didnt even metion ps1 in my resume
• [22:42:12] did you do any intership at the end of 3rd year? and how much of a difference does internships make during campus placements?
• [22:42:16] Leth@l_CumSh0t so yeah i think its a scam
• [22:43:12] AMATERASU he is a dualite so he might have done intership during 4-2 i guess
• [22:43:15] Leth@l_CumSh0t a lot of difference more internships means more project means good resume means more knowledge about the stuff means higher chances
• [22:44:02] what was your most memorable in BITS
• [22:44:10] moment?
• [22:44:11] in the end do the clubs/departments matter?
• [22:44:39] Hmm
• [22:44:58] <-Ronin-> is your cumshot really Lethal?
• [22:45:05] Leth@l_CumSh0t yes
• [22:45:18] .
• [22:45:19] <-Ronin-> how many girls have been injured?
• [22:45:19] did you do any intership at the end of 3rd year?
• [22:45:32] do clubs/dept matter?
• [22:45:54] Leth@l_CumSh0t AMATERASU no i didnt and that was my mistake
• [22:46:14] <-Ronin-> why a mistake?
• [22:46:44] Leth@l_CumSh0t PlatadaPlomo it matters actually but not that much
• [22:46:56] <-Ronin-> why a mistake?
• [22:47:06] Leth@l_CumSh0t i didnt apply
• [22:47:14] Leth@l_CumSh0t i thought i wasnt good enough
• [22:47:34] <-Ronin-> oh, had you applied and rejected, would you still carry the regret?
• [22:47:47] or how can I make up for my foolishness
• [22:48:10] Leth@l_CumSh0t Ronin no regret if i had applied and got rejected
• [22:48:19] <-Ronin-> thanks!
• [22:48:52] learning and doing more of competitive coding from home instead of doing an internship. is it advisable?
• [22:49:22] Leth@l_CumSh0t PlatadaPlomo actually there is nothing like makeup , study for the placements and you will be fine
• [22:50:00] Leth@l_CumSh0t doing internship is advisable and at the same time doing cp too
• [22:50:07] <-Ronin-> should i repeat some subjects i got d in my 4-2?
• [22:50:16] Leth@l_CumSh0t being at home doesnt give you much exposure
• [22:50:51] <-Ronin-> btw i am single degree
• [22:51:03] Leth@l_CumSh0t PlatadaPlomo from that point of view it is recommended
• [22:51:34] ?
• [22:51:09] @Leth I am in 3rd year mech (cg-9) and interested in data science with cp as th only background. Any advise for placement point of view???
• [22:52:18] what is the scenario for core mech placements? I know it's bad. But how bad?
• [22:52:34] why does a mech guy with that high cg want IT lol?
• [22:52:38] Leth@l_CumSh0t to be good friends you need to join otheriwse baate to sabi kar lete acche dost nahi ban paate
• [22:53:23] <-Ronin-> folloowing the herd maybe, or maybe passionate
• [22:53:42] Leth@l_CumSh0t ABCDEFGHIJK do what you are doing ML and cp cg is way too good
• [22:54:02] <-Ronin-> lol
• [22:54:20] 9 ke liye log ro dete hain bhai
• [22:54:25] Leth@l_CumSh0t ABCDEFGHIJK any plans for higher studies?
• [22:54:56] what is the scenario for core mech placements? I know it's bad. But how bad?
• [22:55:14] @Leth what should be done after first year? internship or learning new things?
• [22:55:30] Enjoy re
• [22:55:36] <-Ronin-> lol yep
• [22:55:56] Yes after 1st year you hardly know your branch to get intership
• [22:57:20] Leth@l_CumSh0t AMATERASU core ki companies hai par it is bad
• [22:57:53] <-Ronin-> what are your plans @lethal?
• [22:57:56] <-Ronin-> afterwards
• [22:58:09] Leth@l_CumSh0t pay back my bits loan lol
• [22:58:14] <-Ronin-> oh shiiiit
• [22:58:20] <-Ronin-> damn, true thing?
• [22:58:25] Leth@l_CumSh0t yeah
• [22:58:30] <-Ronin-> thats sad
• [22:57:44] @Leth@l_CumSh0t Bhaiya favourite drunk memories?
• [22:58:35] <-Ronin-> hope you can do it soon
• [22:58:41] <-Ronin-> he doesnt drink
• [22:58:48] <-Ronin-> sab teri tarah nahi hote @anime
• [22:58:58] Mujhe baahar rakh iss se
• [22:59:24] Which sem do better companies come?
• [22:59:56] Leth@l_CumSh0t bhai sunshine me itni druk memories hai ki kya bataye
• [23:00:01] <-Ronin-> batao
• [23:00:28] Bhaiya 1-2 sunshine memories batao
• [23:00:30] <-Ronin-> haan memories
• [23:01:22] Leth@l_CumSh0t companies dono sem me acchi hai
• [23:01:45] <-Ronin-> @leth, did you know dopo personally?
• [23:02:19] Did you try on any girl?
• [23:02:20] Leth@l_CumSh0t haa dopo se mila tha
• [23:02:21] Who started the DoPo thing
• [23:02:29] Leth@l_CumSh0t senior tha wo mera
• [23:02:41] <-Ronin-> what was his branch etc?
• [23:03:45] Leth@l_CumSh0t ABCDEFGHIJK yes they do come
• [23:03:58] Leth@l_CumSh0t i dont know much about DS
• [23:04:22] @Leth bhaiya what is the most memorable moment of your 5 year stay
• [23:04:43] How did you find time for coding during academics?
• [23:04:56] <-Ronin-> its all about priorities
• [23:05:04] <-Ronin-> he prioritized coding
• [23:05:43] <-Ronin-> bhaiyya, yeh @AnimeFreak jaisi legacy dOpO ke paas kyon nahi?
• [23:05:46] Thanks Ronin, but question @lethal ke lie tha
• [23:05:52] <-Ronin-> he was so important during our time
• [23:06:03] <-Ronin-> lol, sorry @DC
• [23:06:41] how was the felling after getting placed?
• [23:06:45] <-Ronin-> and do you have a gf?
• [23:06:50] yeah bhaiya memories
• [23:06:54] Leth@l_CumSh0t bhai class kam attend kari coding kiya free time me
• [23:06:56] memoriessss
• [23:07:03] highest package for cse
• [23:07:08] okay coding in free time done
• [23:07:12] <-Ronin-> wait, lethal is cs?
• [23:07:21] cs is lethal more like
• [23:07:23] Lethal is chem+chem
• [23:07:35] 18lpa tho sayad cse walo ko bhi nhi mila ho
• [23:07:37] lol bakagaijin
• [23:07:43] <-Ronin-> oh, SEALteamSIX wala case hai @Anime?
• [23:07:51] Haan
• [23:08:39] Leth@l_CumSh0t babuchak place hone ki feeling hai serioulsy me place ho gaya ek week tak yahi lagta hai
• [23:09:48] <-Ronin-> but seriously, ab toh ek shot mein saara loan khatam
• [23:09:55] <-Ronin-> where did you get placed?
• [23:11:30] Leth@l_CumSh0t Ronin societe generale
• [23:12:13] apka pakage tho cs walo se bhi zyada hai
• [23:12:26] how did you prepare for your placements?
• [23:12:29] what document?
• [23:13:27] Leth@l_CumSh0t haa release hoga animefreak karega wo
• [23:14:09] ab place hoker kya ker rhe ho
• [23:14:37] Leth@l_CumSh0t abhi to time pass
• [23:15:34] kya place hone ke baad room par pena allowed hota hai
• [23:15:48] As in, the "code" for the bots and all, you guys write from scratch?
• [23:17:10] Leth@l_CumSh0t babuchak no not allowed
• [23:17:50] Leth@l_CumSh0t bakagaijin consider it more like open source every op and downloader from the previous batches contributed
• [23:18:11] Bhaiya reveal identity
• [23:19:01] <-Ronin-> identity
• [23:19:01] you are a dualite in a1 so would have faced some comments from your friends
• [23:19:23] <-Ronin-> haan, yahi ki phoda bhaiyya ne
• [23:19:28] <-Ronin-> aur kya hi hoga
• [23:19:42] Leth@l_CumSh0t people used to say a lot of things but now thats settled
• [23:20:01] you shut all of their mouths
• [23:20:40] in all prev ama sessions , name was the first thing that was revealed
• [23:21:04] Leth@l_CumSh0t JonSnow naa its more like reparing own confidence
• [23:21:31] <-Ronin-> bhaiyya, are you going abroad then?
• [23:21:42] <-Ronin-> i mean, its hq is in Paris
• [23:22:11] Leth@l_CumSh0t naa i will be in bangalore not that lucky but may be if company allows... then yeah
• [23:23:44] Leth@l_CumSh0t Ronin keep doing the work and dont give a fuck about what others do and say
• [23:26:17] Leth@l_CumSh0t Ronin too much overthinking but advice is control it and do the work
• [23:26:37] Leth@l_CumSh0t overthink is confidence killer and will waste a lot of time
• [23:26:43] Leth@l_CumSh0t overthinking
• [23:26:43] Bhaiya what did Manoj Kannan do to you?
• [23:26:52] <-Ronin-> surely, thanks again bhaiyya
• [23:26:59] Leth@l_CumSh0t as someone said he fucked me
• [23:27:03] Leth@l_CumSh0t lol
• [23:27:09] Who is Manoj Kannan?
• [23:27:12] <-Ronin-> fucked you figuratively?
• [23:27:23] <-Ronin-> Kannan Gill ka bhai, khush?
• [23:27:36] A Bio guy taking CS courses
• [23:28:05] The one who gets triggered at people wearing shorts lol
• [23:28:23] arey baakiyo ke side questions lite lo
• [23:29:28] Pooch rha hai bhai ki figuratively choda ya literally
• [23:29:32] <-Ronin-> gaad diye lethal ne jhande
• [23:29:41] Leth@l_CumSh0t ya figuratively
• [23:29:53] Leth@l_CumSh0t literally kon fuck kargea? XD
• [23:32:43] <-Ronin-> when did you start drinking?
• [23:32:45] Leth@l_CumSh0t dont pm me ask questions here
• [23:32:53] Leth@l_CumSh0t 3 year me start kiya
• [23:33:05] leth@l,what are your thoughts on psychedelics
• [23:33:06] Us raat apun piya
• [23:33:10] Leth@l_CumSh0t 3rd year was hell so that justifies it
• [23:33:38] c++ or java?
• [23:33:44] java
• [23:33:49] i've done acid,salvia,DMT,changa
• [23:33:51] Leth@l_CumSh0t c++ for cp and java for development
• [23:34:45] <-Ronin-> yeah true, had to tell a person from 2017 yesterday "bhai haath hatale kandhe se"
• [23:34:49] Leth@l_CumSh0t cutoff to bhaut kam ho gaya hai
• [23:34:57] Leth@l_CumSh0t that is something i dont like
• [23:35:06] Leth@l_CumSh0t i got chemistry at 313
• [23:35:17] <-Ronin-> yeah, me mechanical at 348
• [23:35:26] lol paper hard tha xD
• [23:35:32] <-Ronin-> ghanta hard
• [23:35:35] har saal bacche wahi bolte hai
• [23:35:37] Lol
• [23:35:38] I took ENI at 356 lol
• [23:35:48] Bhai gaaliyan de ke bhaga doonga
• [23:35:56] <-Ronin-> dude mech cutoff was 346, eni was 345 in 2016
• [23:35:57] 313 pe EnI gayi iss saal
• [23:36:08] <-Ronin-> and mech at 330's mein
• [23:36:09] waha giri toh kya?
• [23:36:20] my batch msc physics cutoff was 316
• [23:36:25] juniors always think that their seniors' paper was easier
• [23:36:26] mai 2018 ka student hun 315 pe eni mili hai but i am a proud bitsian
• [23:36:29] Leth@l_CumSh0t lol 313 pe ni
• [23:36:32] Leth@l_CumSh0t eni
• [23:36:33] Leth@l_CumSh0t wtf
• [23:36:40] Bola to 313 pe eni gayi hai
• [23:37:10] bhaiya apko sex mila kya?
• [23:37:23] Ab mil jayega
• [23:37:27] <-Ronin-> yeah, that is true. i can actually feel you
• [23:37:30] Leth@l_CumSh0t they should fall if seats are increasing a dramatic fall in cutoff
• [23:37:38] harrieputtar asking the important questions XD
• [23:37:50] Leth@l_CumSh0t harrieputtar nahi mila
• [23:37:54] batao bhaiya?
• [23:37:58] <-Ronin-> still remember how happy i was " seeing 348" marks flashing on the screen
• [23:38:06] sab velle ho!
• [23:38:07] apne bits mein kya kya rule tode
• [23:38:23] waah ronin
• [23:38:36] ab apni gend pe thappad maarle
• [23:38:43] <-Ronin-> lol
• [23:39:01] Leth@l_CumSh0t harrieputtar saare tode par carefully
• [23:39:15] <-Ronin-> but i stil; feel, the happiness was more from "i am one of those who had to score suck marks to get into mech"
• [23:39:20] <-Ronin-> such*
• [23:39:35] <-Ronin-> this time around, "313" pe eni seems bad
• [23:40:16] it is
• [23:40:18] 2016 batch wants to know your location
• [23:40:23] <-Ronin-> lol
• [23:40:24] lol
• [23:40:28] Krishna bhawan xD
• [23:40:30] lol
• [23:40:39] Woh to mujhe pata hai @Flash
• [23:40:40] <-Ronin-> lol @flash, chalo chalte hain
• [23:40:48] are ip address m likha
• [23:40:55] pada h kr code
• [23:41:03] Animefreak: haan but sabko bhi pata chalna chahiye na :p
• [23:41:04] sare rules tode hai toh room pe kabhi ladki laye ?
• [23:41:46] Leth@l_CumSh0t harrieputtar except that XD
• [23:41:58] <-Ronin-> these niggas thinking woh question tank mein asli paper hota hai
• [23:41:58] maa ki chut tum sab ki\
• [23:41:58] lol
• [23:44:36] angriest moment in bits?
• [23:44:58] Leth@l_CumSh0t had a fight with mr fordo like physical
• [23:45:05] Favourite course you did here?
• [23:45:32] Leth@l_CumSh0t too much fees 1.8 i had to give all of my ps2 stipend
• [23:46:53] Leth@l_CumSh0t so any questions?
• [23:47:59] agar peena start karna hai toh kaha se karna chaiye for begginers
• [23:48:14] Pizzeria pe jaaake
• [23:50:09] where r u placed @lethal
• [23:50:31] Leth@l_CumSh0t 13 jan ko hua tha
• [23:50:55] i remember that day you wrote some messages on main chat
• [23:51:37] do didnt told any drunk stories
• [23:52:28] Leth@l_CumSh0t there was this guy who got drunk with me in 3 rd year
• [23:52:33] Leth@l_CumSh0t beginner
• [23:52:44] Leth@l_CumSh0t so he had 2 shots
• [23:53:06] Leth@l_CumSh0t and when i went to washroom he had one more
• [23:53:10] Leth@l_CumSh0t neat
• [23:53:33] Leth@l_CumSh0t thst guy puked all over the sunshine sofa
• [23:53:41] Lol
• [23:53:46] Leth@l_CumSh0t and then drank again
• [23:53:52] lol
• [23:53:59] Leth@l_CumSh0t i was 5 shots down
• [23:54:03] Leth@l_CumSh0t meri phati
• [23:54:14] Leth@l_CumSh0t campus wapas kaise jaaenge
• [23:54:25] Leth@l_CumSh0t it was 10:30 pm
• [23:54:54] Leth@l_CumSh0t we got up and went to sunshine gate
• [23:55:14] Leth@l_CumSh0t that guy fell staright into mud face first
• [23:55:24] Leth@l_CumSh0t you how the mud is in pilani
• [23:55:27] Leth@l_CumSh0t pure white
• [23:55:35] Leth@l_CumSh0t he looked like a zombie
• [23:55:55] Leth@l_CumSh0t anyways i carried him to the bhang shop
• [23:56:25] Leth@l_CumSh0t by the time i reached he puked like three times and i think 3 baar gira tha
• [23:56:35] Leth@l_CumSh0t he then started to scream
• [23:56:38] Leth@l_CumSh0t paani de bc
• [23:56:48] Leth@l_CumSh0t to that bhang guy
• [23:57:08] Leth@l_CumSh0t then he went to the main road in the middle started to sleep
• [23:57:24] Leth@l_CumSh0t then i decided to not got to camus that night
• [23:57:38] Leth@l_CumSh0t and again came back to sunshine
• [23:57:43] Leth@l_CumSh0t booked a room
• [23:58:04] Leth@l_CumSh0t at like 2 am in the night
• [23:58:13] Leth@l_CumSh0t he woke up and started screaming
• [23:58:23] Leth@l_CumSh0t ran and climbed the wall of sunshiine
• [23:58:36] Leth@l_CumSh0t just for a packet of namkeen
• [23:59:36] Leth@l_CumSh0t then i passed out
• [23:59:41] wtf\
• [23:59:42] yeh sab teen shots mein? lol
• [23:59:47] Leth@l_CumSh0t and woke up next morning
• [23:59:49] ;-X
• [23:59:51] Shit happens
• [23:59:55] XD
• [00:00:04] One of my wingies once drank <5ml and got high.
• [00:00:17] tho dusre bande ka kya hua
• [00:00:18] tu to nhi ?
• [00:00:24] Bhai thoda idhar bhi milega kya??
• [00:00:27] He's still embarrassed about what happened that night.
• [00:00:34] Na bhai @lolmac
• [00:01:06] Leth@l_CumSh0t stuff is next level
• [00:01:26] kabhi campus kai ander high hoker kuch kiya hai
• [00:01:42] kisi bandi ne apke samne pikar kuch harkat ki?
• [00:01:54] Leth@l_CumSh0t harrieputtar kaafi baar
• [00:04:04] batao na its a ama
• [00:04:25] Leth@l_CumSh0t ek bandi daaru peekar
• [00:04:34] Leth@l_CumSh0t band ho gayi
• [00:04:41] Leth@l_CumSh0t she sat beside me
• [00:04:49] Leth@l_CumSh0t and said mere bf ko dekh
• [00:05:04] Leth@l_CumSh0t she said duniya ka sabse bada chutiya hai wo
• [00:05:21] Leth@l_CumSh0t and this one
• [00:05:26] Leth@l_CumSh0t i was in rishikesh
• [00:05:50] Leth@l_CumSh0t camp me this girl she got so high....
• [00:06:20] Leth@l_CumSh0t she started running in circles and was screaming mujhe bacche karne hai something like that
• [00:06:38] Haha
• [00:06:42] Leth@l_CumSh0t rishikesh ka camp == stuff camp
• [00:06:48] Leth@l_CumSh0t highly recommended
• [00:07:02] Leth@l_CumSh0t go trip with your friends there
• [00:07:39] Leth@l_CumSh0t one of my friend he tried it for the first time there
• [00:07:46] aap tho drunken diaries bna lo
• [00:07:51] Leth@l_CumSh0t and he got very fucking high
• [00:08:13] Leth@l_CumSh0t and was discussing how a person can sit on the opposite side of table
• [00:08:16] Leth@l_CumSh0t like wtf
• [00:08:49] you have had some really fun experiences...
• [00:08:53] Leth@l_CumSh0t that was 1.5 hour discussion of table positins sitting
• [00:08:59] Leth@l_CumSh0t positions
• [00:09:23] apke khuch single degree friends honge jab wo place hoker chale jte hai how does it feel
• [00:09:44] hey bhaiya what is the one thing you wanted to do so badly but couldn't and may have some regrets now(not study related offcourse, some sort of kaand)
• [00:10:39] Leth@l_CumSh0t harrieputtar its sad you see your friends going , not a good sight, people have tears in the eyes when they look across the campus gate for one last time as a student
• [00:11:15] where do bitsians take outstis to get laid during fests ?
• [00:11:53] you had cg 6-7 it means most probably you didnt went to classes
• [00:12:04] Leth@l_CumSh0t ethan i wish i interacted more with the people and wanted to do good internships these thing i regret
• [00:12:14] tho room par kya karte thai?
• [00:12:16] Leth@l_CumSh0t n l forman
• [00:12:19] Leth@l_CumSh0t sunshine
• [00:12:30] Pehle pilaana hota hai xP
• [00:12:50] So no to hostel rooms ?
• [00:13:00] did you felt lonely at times..
• [00:13:10] Hostel rooms se better places hain.
• [00:13:41] not wanting to study neither watch anything or listen to anything
• [00:13:49] I thought they were limited to makeouts
• [00:13:51] Leth@l_CumSh0t TobiasE haa hota hai par risky hai
• [00:14:01] Leth@l_CumSh0t but i have seen a lot
• [00:14:05] Leth@l_CumSh0t so get lucky
• [00:14:09] Leth@l_CumSh0t ;)
• [00:14:46] Leth@l_CumSh0t harrieputtar ofcourse its a normal to feel lonely at times
• [00:14:54] Leth@l_CumSh0t but not regular
• [00:16:06] 5 saal ke baad best change and worst change konsa hai ?
• [00:16:19] Personality mein
• [00:17:17] Leth@l_CumSh0t went from a scared,low confidence kid to a confident and strong man
• [00:17:49] any confessions?
• [00:18:35] i fucked a DU chic in pizzeria once xP
• [00:18:56] All singles want to know your location xP
• [00:18:57] seriously..
• [00:19:04] yeah.....
• [00:19:15] Leth@l_CumSh0t yahi hu
• [00:19:25] Any memorable "room session" with a junior ?
• [00:19:34] I have
• [00:20:13] Abhi to memorable sessions aur banenge
• [00:20:59] Lets end this
• [00:21:11] kyo
• [00:21:22] Leth@l_CumSh0t so finally thank you guys
• [00:21:34] a short note for everyone
• [00:21:35] Leth@l_CumSh0t animefreak will release a document
• [00:21:52] Leth@l_CumSh0t its basically my experience in IT placments
• [00:22:17] Leth@l_CumSh0t dont take the document as an absolute method for getting placed
• [00:22:44] give your formal intro
• [00:22:46] Leth@l_CumSh0t its only for you guys to have more idea about how to prepare for IT placments
• [00:22:50] Leth@l_CumSh0t good bye
• [00:23:16] Leth@l_CumSh0t vishal mishra
• [00:23:26] Leth@l_CumSh0t 2014B2A10616P
• [00:23:31] Leth@l_CumSh0t signing off

Age:24, Sex:F, Weight:190lbs, Height:167cm, Race: Caucasian, Current medical issues: vertigo for 4 weeks, Previous medical issues: Asthma, Migraines (both under control) Smoking status: Non-smoker. Medication: Clenil Inhaler.
I have been to my own GP about this, they have said it's BPPV and gave me some tablets (Procholazine?) To help. It made it worse and made me sleepy. I am now taking Ginko Biloba which I find is helping more.
So this dizziness is NOT a spinning feeling, its an off balance feeling, like I'm walking on a matteress, it is not affected by head movement, it does NOT come and go, it is constant. I have some days (like today) where I feel much better all day until like 5/6pm then it comes back. I also have neck pain, headaches and fever during this time.
Sometimes it feels like I get hit round the head with a baseball bat and my brain feels like it swims around my head for a few seconds, it's an awful feeling, it used to happen a couple of times a week, it's now multiple times a day. I'm concerned this is actually a brain issue, my GP's won't give me an MRI because I'm "too young" to have an issues with my brain. No recent head trauma.
Any ideas? Or is this just vertigo and like my GP's have said, I just have to wait it out?

So. It all started. Like a month and a half ago I am usually not a very neat person. My room was always kinda messy piles of clean and dirty clothes on the. Floor and such , nothing to gross And I cleaned Up once a week or so and when i did i would never find bugs or anything . So anyways like a month and a half ago i had. Piles of clothes on the floor. And. I had gone to spend the night at my friends house. When. I came back the next. Day my mom had a bottle with a cockroach in it. She said that in the middle. Of the night. my. Cat was running around my room. So she went to check it out and when she turned on the lights she saw 2 big roaches running on top of all the clothes she caught one but the other one ran away. This literally brought me to tears. I never knew. I had a fear of roaches. Ive always been scared of spider. But what i felt at that moment was intense fear. In my head. I started thinking my room must be infested ! I made my dad take ALL my clothes and blankets out of my room i went to the laundry mat with my mom. And we washed and. Inspected ever article of clothes i had my dad spray my room down with raid that same day. And. I had the door to my room closed. I slept. In the living room for the next week not entering my room but to spray it down everyday at this point my room was spot less no food or water source for anything to survive and. Spraying it. Down everyday. With the door closed. I felt safe sleepjng in the living room . After a week. I missed my bed. I had my parents thoroughly look for any signs of. Bugs. Under my matteress under my bed behind my back board everywhere. They didn't find anything so i was determind to sleep in my. Room. I went and put on 2 Pairs of leggings 2 pairs of knee high socks. Over the legging a long sleeve shirt and a hoodie tucked into the legging and 2 pairs of gloves i was geared up i was calm at first but just the thought of entering my room was overwhelming. I started sweating. Hyperventilating and gelt my chest get tighter and tighter. I couldnt do it i repeated the clothing ritual for the next 3 days with out being able to go in my room on the forth day. I felt calmer. I went in my room. And. I just sat on the bed with the lights on for an hour. Constantly looking all around me i couldn't do it my anxiety prevented me from even laying down it took 2 more days for me to even be able to lay down i would just imagine bugs. Crawling on my. Every where. My legs would feel tingly nd. I couldnt do it i repeated this for another. 5 days each day adding more and more time. Until finally a week later. I was able to sleep the whole night in my geared up pjs with a sheet tucked in at all corners of my body with the lights on. A week after that i finally could sleep with just my shirt and underwear. I still slept with the lights on and the sheet. . This past week ive been able to sleep with a smaller blanket not tucked in i hadnt seen any bugs. I was just thinking about tryin to go to sleep with the lights off tonight when. I was checking. My floor. (Like ive been doing every day) when i found a black shiny thing it looked like a roach! So i called my mom over to check it. Out and. It was. Like a dryed up. Roach wings/back when i saw that all the intense fear came back my whole bodys tingling i know its my mind playing tricks on me. I feel stuff crawling on me. Im on the verge of tears. I havent been able to move from my bed. Now. Im back to thinking what of there is more bugs. Why have i not seen not even one. In all this time why did i find that dryed piece. I vacuumed my carpet often ? Was it lodged somewhere and got dislodged naturally? Did it just die. ? Did it shed ? Dont dead roaches attract more roches ? My room is so clean now its been clean idk what to do. I just needed to vent

On 27 July 2018 my friend and I went to the nearest IKEA to buy stuff. After taking pics of price tags with warehouse numbers of all the stuff we wanted to buy, we go to the warehouse and take this trolley. It has blue handles and here it says "max 200 kg". We take stuff, pay for it, take it home, nothing interesting. The next day I exit my apartment and immediately see 3 children playing with a trolley. I look a little closer. It's the same trolley! Blue handles and "max 200 kg". Where did they get it from?
Anyway, the kitchen is delivered. Then on the next day an assembler arrives and we find that some things are broken. Also he says my apartment isn't compatible well, so I decide to call IKEA and request a refund of the whole kitchen. Spent 47 minutes on the phone. The refund request is created and the kitchen is taken back by IKEA people. Then I get a call from IKEA: they confirm I can now get X amount of money back, but in the refund request there is also a mattress mentioned which wasn't returned. I say we didn't want to return any mattress in the first place. Mysterious mattress is deleted from the refund request. So what's the matteress, you ask? Well, the same friend I went shopping with had been complaining that my mattress is uncomfortable to sleep on so maybe we should return it and buy a good one. Later we were doing some cleaning and somehow found out that to sleep comfortably on this mattress we just need to flip it over. So no need to refund. Yes, it's IKEA mattress. No, there were no talks with IKEA about any mattress. On 5 August I went to IKEA to get my money back. Staff starts working on my refund requests and says "your refund request also had some mattress by mistake, interesting". Unfortunately, there is no more to share. In the end I got my money back. End of story.

I did it again, sorry! I posted the video before the text. Here it is for you to read!
Three True Scary Grndr Stories
Number One: A Different World
I was born and raised in a really small town. I figured out I was gay at a really young age. And you know, sometimes, in a small town, it really doesn't help to be gay. They're not always as progressive as the cities. And this one was definitely not progressive. I was afraid to come out because I didn't know anyone else who was gay. When I was in high school, no one was out of the closet. So I was alone and I honestly believed that I was the only person who was even gay in our town.
My parents got me a cell phone, of course. I didn't have any restrictions as to what apps I could buy. And they didn't monitor me. After not having ANY gay experiences or friends at all, I heard about the Grndr app. Reading about it, it didn't seem like it was a dating app. It actually seemed like it was a sex app and nothing else. But hell, I was a 17 year old gay male teenage virgin. I was perfectly fine with it being a sex app.
I was pretty disappointed when I opened the app up. Yeah, there were people on it. But only one or two people were in my town. And they were much older and not interesting. The next person on the app was like 55 miles away. I got some people messaging me on the app but they weren't anyone I was interested in. So I have to admit being pretty disappointed in the Grndr app.
So when I graduated from high school, I went to college in Dekalb, Illinois at Northern Illinois University. It was really like walking into an alternate universe. There were so many people at the school on the day I moved in. I was required to live in the dorms the first year and have a roommate. However, my roommate decided not to go to school at the last minute and I ended up having a double all to myself.
The first night there, I wondered what I was going to do. I didn't know anyone at school and wasn't sure how to make friends. The campus was so lit, though. People were partying everywhere. People were outside, they were littering the campus at night. I had never seen a town (which the campus was) so alive at night. I found myself wanting to do something but I didn't know what.
I remembered the Grndr app. Suddenly I thought with all the parties going on, this night might be the best to finally lose my virginity. Hell, there had to be lots of gays here and they had to be partying and ready to fool around. So I opened up the app and I was completely shocked by the amount of gay guys on the app. Hell, there was a guy ten feet away. That meant he was in the dorm next to me. That was awesome. I mean, I wasn't interested. But it was neat.
I went flipping through the cornucopia of guys in the app and felt myself feeling as if this was definitely going to be the night.
Then, I got a message from a guy. I checked out his pic and he was gorgeous. Hell, he was a gorgeous blonde twink. His hair dropped over one eye. He asked right away if I wanted to hook up. You know, nowadays, that would be a turn off. However, that night, it made me want it bad. He was much further away than most guys though and when I asked him where he was, I found out he was a townie. I almost balked but I was really horny and really desperate and he was really cute so I got directions and decided to take a walk into the town.
It took a long time for me to find his place. He didn't seem to mind though. I kept messaging him as I was walking through the dark town. It was so much quieter than the campus. Nothing was going on. He kept on sending me sexual messages, doing his best to get me worked up. It was working too. I don't want to get graphic but I had to carry my bag over the front of my jeans while I walked.
Finally, I found his house. And it was weird because all of the lights off were in the house too. I looked at the Grndr app and it showed that he was only about 25 feet away. So I guess he was in the house. I asked him why he had all the lights out and he told me he just wanted to do it in the dark. He told me he was in the foyer and he was going to take me and just do me right against the wall.
That did it. I wanted that so I went up the walkway to the door. I knocked. He messaged me and told me the door was unlock. As I openedthe door, I was stuck between being really horny and excited and a bit scared and apprehensive. This all just seemed a little weird. I closed the door and he was not in the foyer. I walked into the house and he was there. The app showed he was offline. The hallway was dark. I slowly walked down it. When I was about halfway down the hall, a figure stood in the middle of it. It was dark and I couldn't see it. He was like a shadow. I figured he was getting ready to slam me against the wall.
As I was walking down the hallway, someone grabbed me from behind and slammed me hard against the wall. I was shocked, but at first I thought this was part of the fantasy. But then the man down the hall started walking towards us. I hadn't agreed to a threesome. The guy behind me unzipped and unbuttoned my jeans, pushing them down. He told me to step out of them and I did. I was standing there wearing a pair of blue Andrew Christian briefs. My heart was beating fast. But then, I felt something cold against my skin.
"Cut it off," the man walking down the hall said.
My eyes grew wide as I realized what was downstairs was a knife. And I realized I had been tricked.
"Hold still faggot," the man holding me whispered in my ear. "If you don't I am going to do this slowly.
I reacted. I didn't even mean to. I kicked backwards and I missed. But somehow, the miss was what helped me. My foot, coming back, knocked up against his ankle and he fell over a bit. My phone and wallet were in my messenger bag on my arm so I could leave my designer jeans on the floor. He lost his pressure on me and I was able to run towards the door.
The second guy came running at me. I saw him in the hallway mirror. When I got to the front door, he actually got a hold on me. He grabbed my underwear with one hand. I cringed. I felt the knife by my crotch again. I thought I was going to lose my dick and I never lost my virginity.
I struggled and hit and kicked and stomped in an effort to keep my dick. In my struggles, my Andrew Christian's ripped. And they ripped right off my body, freeing me. And I was able to get out the door, down the walkway and onto the sidewalk. The guys came after me but when I got to the sidewalk and booked it, my dick flapping in the breeze, I got away. I didn't even try to cover it as I ran.
When I got back to campus, there were tons of people there. And my nudity was noticed very quickly. I tried covering up with my bag, but someone playfully took it from me. My shirt was quickly removed leaving me totally nude. I was telling people that someone was trying to mutilate me but no one listened. When I finally got back my bag back, I took my totally nude body back to my dorm. Everyone was slapping my ass and a few people grabbing my exposed dick as I ran by. For the first time in my life, I felt like a piece of meat.
I reported this to the police. They went to the house, which was empty and for sale. They said these sort of things have happened before but I was the one who got closest to losing my dick. Fortunately I didn't and I eventually got to use it. But I was also teased for a full semester for being naked that night.
Number Two: TomBoi
Life sucks.
Then it gets wierd.
My life sucks.
Then it got wierd.
I live just down the block from a graveyard.
I could sware that I could smell it, always at sundown. Just a wiff of rot on the evening breaze.
I lived in what I like to call a little big city.
A place that boomed once with factories and a busy comercial section* that met the needs of the workers and their families. It was a good place to grow up.
The factory owners had baseball fields, parks, even had a part in turning our little hospital into a medical complex. When I saw that mostrosity of steel, concrete, and glass being constructed I knew I had to become an engineer.
I studied hard at the school that the factories helped build. I learned to skate on the skate park that the factory owners constructed. I worked hard at it and I wasn't to bad.
My father worked at the factory. Like me he worked hard. He started at an entry level job out of high school and by the time I was ten* he was running the plant, which built appliances and electronics, and making a very good salary.
Then every thing sucked.
Several of the factories had be illigaly dumping toxic waste into the river that ran through the west side and burying barrels of dangerous materials all over the city. That skate park ^{They^} built, The baseball fields. Everything was demolished to retrive the toxic waste.
They were fined, and then they left.
The factories were shut down and slowly everything died.
Now I'm 25. I am not an architect. I am cleanliness expert. It means I scrub toilets.
I see ghosts every day.
Sometimes I think I might be one.
I don't have a car, I mostly get around on my skateboard, It's just cheaper. Every day I go past that graveyard and wonder if that's where I'll end up. I felt like it was calling me. As I rolled past the graveyard I was suddenly shook from my meloncoly by an alert from my pocket. I have a very nice phone. It's basicly what I spend my money on instead of a car.
There was an alert from grndr. I had forgot about that app. I had pretty much taped most of the avalible guys from there.
This was a new guy. I stopped on the side of the road, picked up my board and sat on a near by tomb stone. I patted the stone and told it " don't worry I'll be joining you soon enough, my job is killing me."
I opened up the app and it told me he was only 1000 feet away from me. I though that was really cool. It must be a new guy that just moved in. I hoped I could be the first to "welcome" him to town.
But that would have to wait. I pocketed my phone and rolled on to work as the last vestiges of the dun were consumed by the night.
While I was on break, I took a look at the guy's profile. His profile pic was sexy as hell and like most grndr profiles it was empty. It showed him as offline so I sent him a quick message with a friend request.
I scrubbed toilets. I did a good job. For some reason I still liked to work hard. Even though I was going nowhere and everything sucked.
As I came up on the grave yard I pulled out my phone as I cruised. The guy had not replied to my friend request, but he was still showing up in the same place. I watched the distance shrink as I rolled by the graveyard and then increse again as I turned away twards my block. There was a cluster of houses across the street from the graveyard. Myabe he lived in one of those.
My bed called to me as soon as I got home. By bed I mean two old futon matteresses stacked on top of each other. But it was soft and I went to sleep.
It was on my night off that I heard a notification on my phone again.
He was online.
I stopped and picked up my board and went to sit on a gravestone that was illuminated by the street light. As I approached the stone idly looking at my phone I noticed that the distance had shortned just a bit. He hadn't accepted my request so I didn't think there was any point in sending him a message.
I took a few more steps twards the darkness of the deeper cemetary. my phone glowed in the deeping darkness. It was so strange, the distance kept shrinking as I continued. I used the glow of my phone to make sure that I didn't trip over a stone.
At about eighty feet I suddenly realized what I was doing. I was alone in a dark graveyard folowing a phone to god knows what. Hopefuly alone.
I turned activated the flash light on my phone. The powerful led lit up the night and I quickly scanned the area. There didn't apear to be anyone near by but I realized that there were a lot of places to hide. I was realy scared now. I had felt drawn on the way in but now I wanted to run so bad that I was paralyzed. My phone dinged with an alert again. "TomiBoi has accepted your friend request".
I lost it. I ran to a tall grave marker, turned off my phone's flashlight, and hid. There was a moment of silence. Then my phone dinged, then it dinged again, and again. My terror reached levels I have never expireinced. I looked at the screen of my phone. Message after message from Tomiboi nothing but a period in each one, ant then I saw, the distance had shrunk to zero. It was as if I was out of my body. It was if my head turned against my will to look at the large grannet marker. Thomas Boyle, His death, five days ago. My heart stopped, and I felt something touch me, not physicaly, but someplace inside. Something dark and teribble.
My flight reflex finaly kicked in and I ran. I tripped, ran into grave stones, but I made it to the street in reccord time and in one piece.
I didn't turn my phone on for a day. When I did drum up the courage to turn it on agian, TomiBoi was gone, the app said his account had been removed.
I don't feel right these days. I don't look into what happened and I take a longer route to avoid that graveyard.
I'm scared.
Number Three: The Grinder.
Some people say that they wish they could go back in time and change things. Me personaly, I think that I wouldn't change anything. Not one single thing. I really believe that we are who we are for the experiences that we have. I feel that every experiance I have had is a part of me that I wouldn't trade for anything.
When I was a young man I had a very lonely period in my life. I had some bad breakups and was finding it hard to return to dating. The internet dating thing was still new and fresh so I gave that a try. I didn't have much luck.Many Un returned messages and flat out refusals all for a few bad dates.
One night after a few drinks with a friend, I admited to him that I was at the point where I just wanted to fuck. In response he pulled out his New "Smart" phone and showed me something called grndr, an "app" that let you meet nearby guys for anonamus sex. Well, it claims to be a dating app, but you know.
The next day I had bought a hundred dollar phone and was downloading the app.
I had ten msgs by the time I sent my first. To be honest it was mildly flattering even though several of them were pictures of genitalia along with some horribly misspelled reference to the treatment of those genitalia.
But there was one.
The profile picture was a face shot of a charming looking man with a winning smile. The message read "Looks like your close. Want to come hang out a bit and see if we hit it off?" I was overjoyed. He was close enough for a short walk in a good neighborhood and he seemed saner than most on this grndr thing.
The sun was just setting and the summer weather was mild and cool, the sidewalks well lit with the street lamps just coming to life, I stopped by the seven eleven on the corner and picked up a pack of ciggarets, some condoms and a little bottle of super strong mint breath spray. Larry, the older gentle man who was most always on at this time, chuckled and winked at me. "Gonna get lucky? " I just blushed a bit and shruged. "Heres hoping I guess?"
I stood at the corner just a few houses down smoking a ciggaret and wondering if I could actualy do this. It just felt wierd meeting some one just to have sex. In the end my desire to get laid won out over my anxiety of the situation. I duffed my smoke and practicaly doused my self with mint scent.
When he answered the door he was every bit the man that I had seen in the profile pic and more. Tall and handsom. I was taken imediatly. We stumbled over an awkward greeting and he invited me inside.
His living room was lovely with a large coffee table and a matching set love seat and sofa. He had already set out a bottle of nice brandy and glasses. I really couldn't believe my luck. When he sat down and offerd me to make myself comfortable I choose to make the first move. I sat next to him on the couch, not quite in cuddle range but close enough to put the option out there.
It was as he was pouring a glass of brandy, black berry I belive, for me that I started to feel as though things were going poorly, he seemed stillted, and uncomfortable. At first I had put it down to nerves at meeting someone new, but now it was unerving me.
In an akward silence I took a sip from my glass, and saw the reason for the strange unerving behavior. I saw in the reflection in the bottle on the table a man standing just behind us and slowly creeping closer.
Sometimes when things are happening to fast it seems like your brain kicks into high gear. It felt like I suddenly understood the situation.
In a fluid motion as if automatic(two years of baseball on my elementay school team) I stood, turned and swung my arm in an underhanded throw placing the large brandy glass rightbetween the creeper's eyes where it exploded into a shower of glass fragments.
He screemed sounding more angry than hurt and stumbled back a few steps. Without even thinking I hurtled over the couch (four years on the community swim team specializing in the breast and butterfly stroke.) Landing deftly on my feet, with a good lead, I wound up and let fly with a tremendous boot to the assailants crotch (Four years of varsity soccer first string...fullback) that liffted him clear off his feet. He howled, this time in pain.
There was a moment that I don't quite remember as if my brain had to play catchup with reality, but the next thing I remeber me and that gorgeus guy that I had been so keen on were stomping that creeper like two gangmembers jumping in a new recuit.
Once we got ahold of our selves and the cops were called we found out that the "creeper" had been armed with a mean looking handgun and had done this twice before. He had murdered his last victims in cold blood after robbing them. I was told that I had probably made the right decision in deffending my self.
Me and that gorgeous man are still together Years later.
Never discount any of your experiances they may come to your rescue one day.

Hello,
I'm an incoming freshman at UMN. My mom wants to get some matteress pads shipped to my dorm so I can pick it up there (at least that's what she did with my brother). I'm living in Territorial Hall next year. Do you know where I can find the shipping address, and if they will keep my stuff?

I am at a crossroads.
Discovered that she possibly is narcissistic and successfuly lied many times about "unexplained events/persons", over our entire relationship. Like an onion,.. the more I peeled,.
I can no longer live with the pictures ,(mostly in my mind),and weak explanations. I need to know if I am justified in demanding more accountability. Or if my/her previous baggage is the only real issue. Because it's considerable.
I used to work on the road as a contractor, did this for years. It paid well but I mostly would not recommend it to any new couples or any with issues. During this time I discovered the first of what would be many poorly explained appearances and events. Always me,. giving the benifit of the doubt. Even in the face of really shady circumstances. Her saving grace was that she appears to be the most wholesome and honest person, and part of my original attraction is that she seemed above typical dishonest nonsense I had experienced in my past.

I am on my phone,. this is hard enough to do format wise. But serious, honest answers are what I need. And I will edit and update at every oppertunity. Please be patient. I will answer all as openly as I can, in as much detail as possible. 

1) came home found lube,(yes) in a sex toy we were gifted from her wedding shower. A toy we've NEVER used. She could've said anything else, but chose to say , she did'nt know.!
2) away again,. returned to find her "cleanly groomed" not wanting sex, when she did finally give in, found a bruise that has been described as a "halo pinch" (condom ring rub) on her.
3) when I did finally start meeting her co-workers, they were completely weird vibe wise, looked at me like they had something they wanted to say or ask me, and that continued throughout our relationship, we finally moved far away for employment,. only to have the same strangeness occur at our new location with others that we both barely knew.
4) I met very few friends, when I did it was very controlled and they also sometimes were kinda questioning of how we got along,. this never meant anything till much later,..when I discovered she neglected to tell me about a segment of her friends that she did NOT share with me. Most of them are either gay, bi, or into other swap or poly type relationships.
[just to be clear,. I have no problem with someone's sexuality or prefference ,. my only issue is people who cheat and lie. in my opinion you do not get to have your cake,.. all by yourself! ..that being said, I gave ample oppertunity to be up front with me, it was discussed,.. plenty!].
5)returned home to find either candle wax or bikini wax on the bare matteress, (pulled sheets to wash) of our bed ,. again, her no clue where it came from, we lived alone.
6) There was a time that she became agressive and experimental BOTH times she had been spending alot if time at work extreme hours/long distances. And later would claim to not even know people she worked with very closely. These turned out to be people she is still in contact with, yet claim to not know by name? And all of them have a link in the time-lines in question. So of course I never met them or would have heard about them. She was caught in a "work buddy" thing with a douchbag that supposedly lent her money twice, a large sum both times, it was according to her all there was, but he had been texting her walls of "I understand your struggles" and I instantly recognized he was blowing smoke up her rear,. and of course when I asked, I got trickle-truthed, and eventually got an explanation about needing money. But we were not in a financial crisis, until she over-extended for extra stuff, and then got pregnant, and wanted to not be. which also claims was not any part of it.
7)By this time I realized that had happened to us once before and were in a difficult situation financially. But we rarely even had sex for much of our early years. I can't tell you how many times I was left alone staring at the walls at the end of our evenings, while most assumed I would be the more likely to cheat,. I never did. And she would also behave completely differently at work, and act completely dreadful once home. Avoiding almost any social situation as a couple /family and only her selection choices would seem to allow her any comfort.
Sometimes ,. her reactions or lack of what would seem to be an appropriate response to a question or situation was enough to make me crazy. Because she would lie about something so easily and act as if it was within her right to alter what honesty is. And over the top anger when it is not accepted for facts that betray her story. As if somehow I am at fault for knowing the truth.
I believe she had holdover issues from sexual abuse and delayed her self development of accepted sexual norms, she wanted to continue to experiment further after we were married and she gained some security and confidence, and there were plenty of alternative people in a town where, I knew practically no-one . It was suggested by someone that she had participated in sex with multiple people, more than once. At the time I thought it was ludicrous.
Now I question alot of associations and weirdness from people I had met and some never met but learned of later. Because the one constant all of the time was her and her "deer in the headlights" tell that somehow people can pick up on, and I think she has done this her whole adult life. And no way did she feel that these two worlds should ever meet. No one should ever have to hide their desires from their S.O. It's sad that anyone would lie just to avoid confronting themselves and the possibility of getting dumped.
Someone said,. If you look at someone's choices of friends,. you will see the real person inside. Most of her friends border extremely liberal ( not in the political sense ). But the addition of friends that exist that she kept out of sight so to speak , and the subtle hints and name-drops over the years by kind strangers have left me with a big empty space that alternates between rage and resolve.
I love her and All I hoped for was that somewhere along the way she would find the value of it and be honest with herself even. If she could have once told the truth when asked. But it has never been forthwith and certainly never complete. And my fear is just how far did it go,. because there is more even. We do have some wonderful children but there is one that I have always and still question paternity. I am considering testing finally. I would never punish any of my kids for such a thing. If it were to be discovered I would regret having to tell him. But at some point I would have to. Is it really necessary for any person to keep tabs on persons you know your S.O. would have a problem with in social media,. ie: FB? Why would you seek out old boyfriends and wink interests and stalk them highly defensive with reguard to inquires and insist that no one ever flirts or shows interest in you,. Lie straight to my face about conversations and refuse to "shut-down" people that do flirt? Trust me,. it has never been a control thing, that is not what we are talking about here. If anything she felt safe and secure in that I loved her SO much that she felt as if she could just doormat me,. which is what has happened. And when I finally started to wake up it was just too much damage to control for her. Then to top it off she became very abusive and irresponsible during the last and final discovery. If the guy had either really been more than a load of B.S. or either not rejected her,. (was in a relationship himself, failing, and a drug addict), my belief is she would have left then. She tried to make me leave, clearly more than once.
I asked for the truth many times, she claims there is nothing to tell,. never was,.. and any problems we had were in my head,. and refused to see counselors or address any sexuality issues that also, denies exist.
Bottom line; Did she cheat?,. and continue to carry the lies. Is it a serial cheat problem? I just wanted to do the right thing by my family. But even they believe she has mistreated me and us all in turn.
**tl;dr Wife is clearly not above board with reality and honesty,. many indicators suggest she played, until it became almost impossible to hide any longer. Years of disrespect and denial to herself and in bed. How to find true peace, I need closure,. sleep, some expectation of sex, and honesty. Do I continue, which path,. how long, what cost?

First of all i dont really know how to say what is happening, my Wife tells me that i am not the same Person anymore,and i have noticed we have been arguing alot , and for longer periods some times we will go 6-7 days without talking.and that is not like us at all ! I guess i should start by telling you that i have always Been facinated with the paranormal,and i guess about 3 maybe 4 months ago i found a computer while driving through town, I guesss these People lost their home and took what they could but left a few Items behind for the taking,I saw the " free "sign and stoped to look at a chair and thats when i saw the computer flopped over under a torn matteress, the first thing my wife said was just leave it there it dosent work " but me being a mr. fix it " said i can fix it,and thats when it all started. after taking it Home and hooking it up and finding it did work, I started messing around and eventually hooked into somones WIFI and within a few hours i was surffing The web, For some odd reason i tried looking up ghost and then real ghost stories ,then i decided to check into live ghost cams. Thats When i wish i had stopped " I came across several different sites, at first i couldnt see anything but i was always determined that being a beliver i would see somthing , so for several weeks i logged on and stayed up till all hours of the night. Then one night while i was playing slots on my cell phone,i decided to see if things would be different if i used my cell phone camera and took some pictures of the web cams at first there was nothing ,but then after a while i had gotten tierd of messing with it so i put it down while i went to grab a snack , when i got back i picked up the phone, and what i saw looking back at me scared the hell out of me . I guess i must have some how hit the zoom on my phone,and what happened was pretty amazing,it was hard for me grasp the reality of what i was looking at or rather what was looking at me! I was looking at a dog faced man ,through all the exciment and the rush i was feeling and while i was trying to wake up my wife,i must have again hit something on my phone and it went back to the home screen, and by the time i got back to the picture to show my wife it wasnt there anymore. So with her being mad cause i had woke her and me being dumb founded and trying to understand what i had just saw. I figured there has to be an explanation , So i started looking at the picture again and thats when i remembered my snack, so i put the phone down and when i picked it back up ther it was, but now it wasnt a dog faced man,it was just a dog sitting on a table.but it was the same dog that i had saw earlier thats when i looked a litrtle closer and saw several more dogs they were all in this front room and they were all different breeds but what grabed my attention was the fact that they were all see through,and a small dog in the middle was jumping in the the air with a snarrling look on its face, and a few inches above its mouth was a human face that was also see through , i was going to wake my wife again ,but decided to wait till morning. So in the morning when we woke up,I hurried and grabed the phone, and thats when i realized i might be losing my mind, because i know this was a picture, and from my experiences through life things in pictures do not move or change, at least they hadnt until now! And so thats where im at ,i have hundreds of pictures from ghost cams to pictures that ive taken around my house and i even took a few off the T.V.from ghost shows and in all of my pictures the ghost are clear and easy to see and they arent even noticed on t.v. but they appear in my pictures and continue to change and they move around all day I even went and had some copies made,and in the still shots they move and change, Im not sure who to talk to or show these pictures to, but i really could use some advice right now. So if ther nis anyone who might know who i can contact or talk to please let me know. you can contact me at Tim59.TA47@gmail.com
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