Do shrooms stop opiate withdrawal
Quitting Kratom
2013.07.11 03:27 kirkkommander Quitting Kratom
Welcome to Quitting Kratom! Our purpose is to give and receive support with QUITTING KRATOM, withdrawal & recovery. This sub is for those wanting to QUIT FOR GOOD. Except for tapering, we don't condone any use of Kratom whatsoever. We've no opinions on "minimal usage" or usage for pain management, etc. TOGETHER we CAN!
2009.06.24 06:34 hax0r Opiates
Discussion of all things related to the narcotics known as opiates, from harm-reduction to pharmacology. WE ARE PARTICIPATING IN THE BLACKOUT! We will NOT be adding approved users to the community as we will return to normal functions tomorrow
2010.01.26 06:19 dgillz Alcoholism
Information and support for those affected by alcoholism/Alcohol Use Disorder. If you are concerned about alcohol's effect on your life or a loved one's life, please feel welcome.
2024.05.22 00:31 Critical_Tumbleweed3 How long after stopping Rexulti do the withdrawals come? It last in your system for 19days!!!
Do withdrawals start before then?
submitted by Critical_Tumbleweed3 to Rexulti_Brexpiprazole [link] [comments]
2024.05.21 23:28 MechanicAgreeable592 feeling like my life has been destroyed by multiple CT scans and benzos
I had an abdominal CT scan at age 20 for appendicitis (42 yr old M). Next was a head CT a few years later because of head pain. 2009 was a scan of my chest due to pain. In 2010 I had sharp neck pain and panicked, and the ER doctor said I needed a neck scan. I broke my ankle in 2013 and had a scan of my ankle. After my ankle surgery, I had pain under my rib cage and was told I needed another scan, but I said I didn’t want one, so the doctor gave me a VQ scan, saying it was not dangerous, yet it turns out it has radiation. In 2017 I had a CT angiogram. A vertigo episode landed me in the ER, and they gave me another head CT. Finally, I was given another head CT at the ER due to what most likely was intense benzodiazepine withdrawal symptoms (was on benzos for over 11 years).
After stopping the benzo, I have dealt with so many crazy physical symptoms. I have a doctor ordering a lung CT and I might need another CT angio and who knows what else.
My mind is going crazy over all the scans & body sensations, and it feels like it’s too late to do anything about this. It seems like all of these scans have destroyed my health. However, one doctor told me he’d be concerned if I had 17 scans in a year. Others have told me the risk is very low, but I saw news articles saying the radiation risk is high from low doses. Is my thinking about this rational or irrational? Do I still have a chance to live a healthy life?
submitted by MechanicAgreeable592 to blueprint_ [link] [comments]
After stopping the benzo, I have dealt with so many crazy physical symptoms. I have a doctor ordering a lung CT and I might need another CT angio and who knows what else.
My mind is going crazy over all the scans & body sensations, and it feels like it’s too late to do anything about this. It seems like all of these scans have destroyed my health. However, one doctor told me he’d be concerned if I had 17 scans in a year. Others have told me the risk is very low, but I saw news articles saying the radiation risk is high from low doses. Is my thinking about this rational or irrational? Do I still have a chance to live a healthy life?
2024.05.21 23:21 Dwarven_cavediver The Years of Gold and Iron III
 | The Years Of Gold and Iron Part III submitted by Dwarven_cavediver to AlternateHistory [link] [comments] Mike Mentzer’s 1992 Presidential Campaign is a success! And as the 42nd President of the United States one of His first Acts was to Immediately Downsize Many Areas of Government. ending Several restrictions on Businesses and Bringing back manufacturing to many ailing Industrial areas in the United States. “The Rust Belt is gonna get a Wash and New coat of paint.” Was a slogan of his early presidency, and he followed through as The American Auto Industry and the Burgeoning Computer Industry open up factories all over the former rust belt and Inner cities in America. With a healthy manufacturing industry and an economic Boom Pres. Mentzer goes about making sure that the younger Generation gets to enjoy the wealth and know what to do with it. In late 1993 he Pushes the Heavy duty Education Overhaul act into effect; Adolescents all over America will Now have Access to Premium Physical Education and civics and Economic classes, along with better food and health care services inside of schools. While being a Libertarian Pres. Mentzer understands that the youth in America will only stay free and happy in their home country if they can enjoy it to its fullest. He even Asks Lee Iacocca (head of Chrysler corporation who He Helped by Making Jeep a Massively Popular Brand and providing free publicity for it’s newer models.) to help bring back Affordable automobiles for Younger Americans. A lot of this came from His radical Defunding of Both the ATF and EPA whom he long considered to be Government funded Overbearing Paper pushers. And with considerable backlash from the more conservative groups at the time Decriminalizing Both Cannabis and certain steroids. This would not be the Only Way he made enemies. Mike mentzer was an objectivist and the idea of Religion in schools was already not in his mind a good thing, but also was Military Bloat spending, or The North American Free trade act. In His mind with the cold war Over and with His plan being to make his Country as powerful as possible He Needed American Goods to be worth more and Not nearly as much spent on the most powerful army on the planet. His most vocal opponents weren’t from a political standpoint. Rather a New coalition formed from a single Event. It’s 1993 and Nirvana is on top of the world. Kurt Cobain wouldn’t Describe it that way though. The stress from Fame and an unfortunate Addiction to heroin has him and his band mates Dave Grohl And Krist Noveslic at each other’s throats for the seemingly last time. Kurt storms off out of the studio and Heads to his home to be alone, only to be confronted in the streets by A large, Square Jawed Man who looks and smells like he has not showered in a while. “Give Your clothes and your money!” He yells in a thick accent. Kurt can barely process what was said before being lifted and thrown against a nearby wall. Dave and Krist come outside in time to see Kurt left a beaten Heap of blood and Meat on the concrete outside a small church. The pastor is calling for EMS already, claiming he did what he could to chase off the attacker and stop the bleeding. Kurt spends 4 months in the hospital and suffers through withdrawal hell. When he leaves however, h is not the same man he was. When you can’t walk, or even talk for months, reading and listening become your escape. The pastor who saved him Showed up every day and read passages of the bible to Kurt. Explaining he recognized the Track marks on Kurts arm and has Junkies in his congregation. As Kurt heals he becomes closer and closer to Both God and the Gospel, focusing on Jesus’ Healing of the sick and his condemnation of the wealthy. He reflects on people like Joel Olsteen who He grows to despise as a Grifter and a Heretic as anyone who uses God to make money is a Snake, and how we need someone for the Poor. When He finally Emerges from the Hospital he’s been drug free for months, Divorced Courtney Love, and Become devoted to Spreading his message He believes he received from God. With His bandmates and friends in the grunge scene soon becoming fervent supporters as well as many lower and Middle income families who see their kids listening to A large selection of now Christian and Charitable Bands which appeal to the Religious and Poorer people left behind in the Agricultural areas of the US where Mentzer made little effort to appeal to. The democratic Party sees the writing on the wall as the Libertarian Party Assimilates many voters from the Republican Party and renames itself the Freedom Party, Political Candidates from the Democratic and Green Party soon Join up with the Prog Cross Movement and soon Become the Christian Charity League. As the 1990’s comes to an end we see The Middle east in flames as With Less Military involvement from the US under Mentzer’s leadership Isreal Dominating the areas Nearby and Saddam and Ghadafi Dividing up the northern African region. Saddam seeks one last insult to the west that came in and invaded back in the early 90’s during the bush administration, and plans a Gas attack in Oregon. |
2024.05.21 22:48 Ok_Figure6736 Itchy Skin
Hey,
I am struggling with itchy skin since 2-3 months. It roughly started when I was taking Bupropion.
I am not experiencing any itchy skin during the day (dressed) at all, but in the evening, undressed & laying down, my legs & arms start itching everywhere. Basically when my skin is exposed to the air, which is confusing me, and also causing lack of sleep. Sometimes its worse, sometimes its not even there. But the itchy sensation and urge to scratch myself everywhere can become pretty annoying when trying to sleep.
I was sure bupropion was causing the issue, so I withdrawed & swapped to Moclobemid. The issue with the itching is still there, its noted down as a rare side effect of Moclobemid aswell, so I am not sure what to do. I have never had problems with that before taking antidepressants.
Has anyone else experienced this kind of problem? Is there any solution besides enduring it or withdrawing? Moclobemid is my 5th antidepressant and its working finally, would prefer to not stop taking it.
submitted by Ok_Figure6736 to antidepressants [link] [comments]
I am struggling with itchy skin since 2-3 months. It roughly started when I was taking Bupropion.
I am not experiencing any itchy skin during the day (dressed) at all, but in the evening, undressed & laying down, my legs & arms start itching everywhere. Basically when my skin is exposed to the air, which is confusing me, and also causing lack of sleep. Sometimes its worse, sometimes its not even there. But the itchy sensation and urge to scratch myself everywhere can become pretty annoying when trying to sleep.
I was sure bupropion was causing the issue, so I withdrawed & swapped to Moclobemid. The issue with the itching is still there, its noted down as a rare side effect of Moclobemid aswell, so I am not sure what to do. I have never had problems with that before taking antidepressants.
Has anyone else experienced this kind of problem? Is there any solution besides enduring it or withdrawing? Moclobemid is my 5th antidepressant and its working finally, would prefer to not stop taking it.
2024.05.21 22:20 PayGroundbreaking251 No period before FET?
I had my ER in April and got my period 6 days later. Started the birth control and was on it for 3 weeks. Today’s 8th day after I stopped bc, but I didn’t get a withdrawal bleeding. I had my blood work and ultrasound done today, and the clinic says I'm good to start Letrozole (doing modified natural FET). I’m a bit concerned that we start FET with no period/withdrawal bleeding. I trust my clinic, but wanted to see if someone had the same experience and how did the FET go?
submitted by PayGroundbreaking251 to IVF [link] [comments]
2024.05.21 20:50 MaximumOk50 Changing environment or taking medications, which do you think plays a bigger role in recovery?
While the above two can be carried out simultaneously, many don’t have a lot of choices or freedom. I want to share and record my personal experience quitting meds cold turkey. I have to admit that I am not aware of the subreddit rule until I finish writing, but I want to share my opinion and have a discussion. Still if it violates the rule, please feel free to delete the post.
In my unprofessional and personal opinion, an environment with less stress, routine, healthy diet and support network are way more important and helpful for my recovery, and from my experience, meds didn’t help much when I tried to build the things above. Insights, self-awareness and self-assessment are key. (Although according to some professionals, noncompliance to medication is poor insight.)
I am a 20-year-old college student diagnosed with psychotic depression in early 2023. I have suffered from delusions and hallucinations since I was 15, but they come and go, usually subsiding when there are more social interactions and worsening again when living in stressful environment.
When I entered college, I was so suicidal with all kinds of plans so I finally sought help. My usual dosage was 20mg of Citalopram and 7.5mg of Olanzapine. I personally think they were helpful to a certain extent, especially after a couple weeks of first taking them: I was less suicidal, less paranoid, and less troubled by the obsessive thoughts/ delusions. I am not sure whether this was placebo effect or not. But things got worse in October when I put myself into a very stressful situation where I became suicidal again. I didn’t get out of bed for about 2 weeks, skipped class and assignments, and had to drop courses. What eventually got me to get up and shower and brush was my kind friend inviting me to go out.
I was very frustrated with the meds this time. I have already been suffering from the side effects of them: weight gain and being tired. I must admit that as I was unmotivated to cook, I ate a lot of junk food, so it is not only because of the meds (metabolic effects?), but also my fault.
When I met with the doc a couple days later and talked about the weight gain and the relapse, he just increased the dosage of Citalopram to 40mg and ignored my concerns. I started to doubt whether the meds are effective or not for my situation.
I later switched to another doc who got me on both Abilify and Olanzapine and cut Citalopram. I told him I wanted to taper off the meds, but he said to ‘protect the brain’ I should at least take the lowest dosage.
In mid-December during semester break when being on 2.5 mg of Abilify and Olanzapine, I quitted cold turkey. At the same time, I got on a diet to lose weight. I felt fine. It wasn’t until later that I learned how extremely lucky I am: many suffer from withdrawal syndrome. I lost a bit of weight and felt like I got some self-confidence and control back. When I told my family about quitting meds a week later, they were mad and told me how dangerous it was, suggesting me to go talk to the doc and ask for tapering off instead. But I refused. I was extremely terrified of the thought that going back on meds would put my weight back on and I was rebellious. I don’t want to lose face.
So I never went back to the doc and have been lying to my counsellor about still taking meds since. I am afraid to be thought with poor insight. I also don’t know how to talk about my life when all worries can be attributed to me not taking the meds.
It has been 6 months since I stopped my meds. The goal I have set is to function: go to class, get work done on time, maintain basic hygiene.
There were many moments when I was so troubled by my intrusive thoughts (I don’t really know the difference between obsessions/delusions) that I couldn’t focus to work, from minutes to hours. I realize and acknowledge I really am sick. Usually I either write my thoughts, feelings and behaviors down, and take 200mg of L theanine. These combined with more suitable college courses chosen do help. I was on a diet and lost more weight, feeling better. When I struggled, I talked to my friends, who patiently listened. I am always grateful for them.
I have been struggling to follow my routine since March. I fall off the wagon and have been eating fast food again and cramming for deadlines. Fortunately I still managed to survive the semester with ok grades. But I am a bit lost: I quitted meds cold turkey because I hated the weight gain, why am I allowing myself to fall back in this time? I am disappointed with myself, and there is guilt, shame and endless spiral and vicious cycle: I feel bad about myself, so I stuff myself with shitty food to feel better… but ended up feeling worse. I frankly don’t know how to get out of the pit; I am still kinda ‘functioning’, just not as healthy as I want to.
Anyway, I still don’t want to go back to meds. I know they can help, and the relapse possibility off meds is high. But right now, I want to believe that I am capable of taking care of myself.
Please share your thoughts/ stories/ experiences/ research studies about recovery if you are comfortable with it.
submitted by MaximumOk50 to PsychMelee [link] [comments]
In my unprofessional and personal opinion, an environment with less stress, routine, healthy diet and support network are way more important and helpful for my recovery, and from my experience, meds didn’t help much when I tried to build the things above. Insights, self-awareness and self-assessment are key. (Although according to some professionals, noncompliance to medication is poor insight.)
I am a 20-year-old college student diagnosed with psychotic depression in early 2023. I have suffered from delusions and hallucinations since I was 15, but they come and go, usually subsiding when there are more social interactions and worsening again when living in stressful environment.
When I entered college, I was so suicidal with all kinds of plans so I finally sought help. My usual dosage was 20mg of Citalopram and 7.5mg of Olanzapine. I personally think they were helpful to a certain extent, especially after a couple weeks of first taking them: I was less suicidal, less paranoid, and less troubled by the obsessive thoughts/ delusions. I am not sure whether this was placebo effect or not. But things got worse in October when I put myself into a very stressful situation where I became suicidal again. I didn’t get out of bed for about 2 weeks, skipped class and assignments, and had to drop courses. What eventually got me to get up and shower and brush was my kind friend inviting me to go out.
I was very frustrated with the meds this time. I have already been suffering from the side effects of them: weight gain and being tired. I must admit that as I was unmotivated to cook, I ate a lot of junk food, so it is not only because of the meds (metabolic effects?), but also my fault.
When I met with the doc a couple days later and talked about the weight gain and the relapse, he just increased the dosage of Citalopram to 40mg and ignored my concerns. I started to doubt whether the meds are effective or not for my situation.
I later switched to another doc who got me on both Abilify and Olanzapine and cut Citalopram. I told him I wanted to taper off the meds, but he said to ‘protect the brain’ I should at least take the lowest dosage.
In mid-December during semester break when being on 2.5 mg of Abilify and Olanzapine, I quitted cold turkey. At the same time, I got on a diet to lose weight. I felt fine. It wasn’t until later that I learned how extremely lucky I am: many suffer from withdrawal syndrome. I lost a bit of weight and felt like I got some self-confidence and control back. When I told my family about quitting meds a week later, they were mad and told me how dangerous it was, suggesting me to go talk to the doc and ask for tapering off instead. But I refused. I was extremely terrified of the thought that going back on meds would put my weight back on and I was rebellious. I don’t want to lose face.
So I never went back to the doc and have been lying to my counsellor about still taking meds since. I am afraid to be thought with poor insight. I also don’t know how to talk about my life when all worries can be attributed to me not taking the meds.
It has been 6 months since I stopped my meds. The goal I have set is to function: go to class, get work done on time, maintain basic hygiene.
There were many moments when I was so troubled by my intrusive thoughts (I don’t really know the difference between obsessions/delusions) that I couldn’t focus to work, from minutes to hours. I realize and acknowledge I really am sick. Usually I either write my thoughts, feelings and behaviors down, and take 200mg of L theanine. These combined with more suitable college courses chosen do help. I was on a diet and lost more weight, feeling better. When I struggled, I talked to my friends, who patiently listened. I am always grateful for them.
I have been struggling to follow my routine since March. I fall off the wagon and have been eating fast food again and cramming for deadlines. Fortunately I still managed to survive the semester with ok grades. But I am a bit lost: I quitted meds cold turkey because I hated the weight gain, why am I allowing myself to fall back in this time? I am disappointed with myself, and there is guilt, shame and endless spiral and vicious cycle: I feel bad about myself, so I stuff myself with shitty food to feel better… but ended up feeling worse. I frankly don’t know how to get out of the pit; I am still kinda ‘functioning’, just not as healthy as I want to.
Anyway, I still don’t want to go back to meds. I know they can help, and the relapse possibility off meds is high. But right now, I want to believe that I am capable of taking care of myself.
Please share your thoughts/ stories/ experiences/ research studies about recovery if you are comfortable with it.
2024.05.21 20:18 Living-Substance8116 Constantly changing symptoms??
Hi all. I'm at my wits end in trying to decipher what's happening in my brain, so i figured I'd stop here and see if anyone has any idea what is going on so I can bring it to a doctor. I am autistic, and maybe that can account for some of the irregularities, but I can't find any medically backed articles about how it can affect dissociative disorders so I'm not sure.
--I (18f) began experiencing heavy dissociative tendencies a few years ago. I can't remember anything from 2021, I only recall half of 2020, and little portions before 2022. Before that, my childhood memories are extremely spotty. I remember certain events, (like moving states) but other seemingly major events are missing from my memory (when my sister was born, starting school in the new state, etc) I will say I had what I think was a rather traumatic childhood by most standards, but I'm somewhat detached from it. I couldn't remember several childhood events before 2020 as well.
--as of recently (2021) the noticable dissociation has gotten worse. I don't know if it's because something happened, or I've had more time to myself after leaving school, but it's extremely apparent in day to day life. The problem is the symptoms keep changing and I can't remember 70% of the 'episodes' (I guess I'll call them) enough to describe them. I have dissociative amnesia (buying things from stores I don't recall going to, completing entire shifts at my job and not realizing it, being unable to remember entire people or important conversations) but more often than not it's emotional amnesia, which makes trying to solve this harder. I don't remember how I feel the moment I 'snap out of it'. It feels like there are different versions of me, but I wouldn't go so far as to call them alters- and as I'll get in to, I don't fit that criteria.
--very occasionally, I dissociate and try to injure myself. It feels less like me doing it and more like someone is puppetting me to do dangerous and risky things for no real reason. I won't go into depth, but I will say these things have caused me to be sick for several days and I have over 100 scars from these takeovers. It feels like somebody is trying to kill me, and if what I have is OSDD/DID that doesn't make sense. The alters are supposed to protect you. This feels inherently malicious, I feel like I'm being possessed.
--sometimes when I dissociate it's extremely distressing, I feel like I'm drowning and can't swim, I can't talk or hardly move and I'm scared I'll do something I don't want to do. Occasionally, like last night (which is what drove me to make this post) it's calming and almost comforting.
--my worldview shifts too, but is rarely consistent with patterns that alters would have. Sometimes I feel like an animal trapped in a human husk, desperate to claw my way out and withdrawal from society. I can't recognize myself in mirrors and I bite my arms. It's extremely distressing, I'd even go far enough to say it's like body dysmorphia but for being in a human body. Sometimes I feel incredibly human and am rather comforted by it. Sometimes I'm extremely pessimistic or nihilistic for no good reason, and sometimes I'm the most optimistic person I know. It seems to switch on a dime and I don't get it.
--like I sais, I don't think I have alters. not only are the dissociative states too inconsistent, but I don't have any of the hallmark traits that come with having alters (going by different names, changing clothes, different handwriting etc) still, every time I talk about these symptoms someone points me to OSDD/DID. I don't think it's that and I don't want it to be that. Maybe that makes me immature, I don't know.
-- I understand dissociative disorders are not well understood even by the scientific community and it can vary, but the last time I went to the doctor with a mental ailment and didn't have 287364737 pages worth of symptoms for a problem I suspected they turned me away at the door. So any suggestions would be greatly appreciated :]
submitted by Living-Substance8116 to Dissociation [link] [comments]
--I (18f) began experiencing heavy dissociative tendencies a few years ago. I can't remember anything from 2021, I only recall half of 2020, and little portions before 2022. Before that, my childhood memories are extremely spotty. I remember certain events, (like moving states) but other seemingly major events are missing from my memory (when my sister was born, starting school in the new state, etc) I will say I had what I think was a rather traumatic childhood by most standards, but I'm somewhat detached from it. I couldn't remember several childhood events before 2020 as well.
--as of recently (2021) the noticable dissociation has gotten worse. I don't know if it's because something happened, or I've had more time to myself after leaving school, but it's extremely apparent in day to day life. The problem is the symptoms keep changing and I can't remember 70% of the 'episodes' (I guess I'll call them) enough to describe them. I have dissociative amnesia (buying things from stores I don't recall going to, completing entire shifts at my job and not realizing it, being unable to remember entire people or important conversations) but more often than not it's emotional amnesia, which makes trying to solve this harder. I don't remember how I feel the moment I 'snap out of it'. It feels like there are different versions of me, but I wouldn't go so far as to call them alters- and as I'll get in to, I don't fit that criteria.
--very occasionally, I dissociate and try to injure myself. It feels less like me doing it and more like someone is puppetting me to do dangerous and risky things for no real reason. I won't go into depth, but I will say these things have caused me to be sick for several days and I have over 100 scars from these takeovers. It feels like somebody is trying to kill me, and if what I have is OSDD/DID that doesn't make sense. The alters are supposed to protect you. This feels inherently malicious, I feel like I'm being possessed.
--sometimes when I dissociate it's extremely distressing, I feel like I'm drowning and can't swim, I can't talk or hardly move and I'm scared I'll do something I don't want to do. Occasionally, like last night (which is what drove me to make this post) it's calming and almost comforting.
--my worldview shifts too, but is rarely consistent with patterns that alters would have. Sometimes I feel like an animal trapped in a human husk, desperate to claw my way out and withdrawal from society. I can't recognize myself in mirrors and I bite my arms. It's extremely distressing, I'd even go far enough to say it's like body dysmorphia but for being in a human body. Sometimes I feel incredibly human and am rather comforted by it. Sometimes I'm extremely pessimistic or nihilistic for no good reason, and sometimes I'm the most optimistic person I know. It seems to switch on a dime and I don't get it.
--like I sais, I don't think I have alters. not only are the dissociative states too inconsistent, but I don't have any of the hallmark traits that come with having alters (going by different names, changing clothes, different handwriting etc) still, every time I talk about these symptoms someone points me to OSDD/DID. I don't think it's that and I don't want it to be that. Maybe that makes me immature, I don't know.
-- I understand dissociative disorders are not well understood even by the scientific community and it can vary, but the last time I went to the doctor with a mental ailment and didn't have 287364737 pages worth of symptoms for a problem I suspected they turned me away at the door. So any suggestions would be greatly appreciated :]
2024.05.21 20:03 WillowGrouchy2204 How to think about buying 2nd-ish house with regard to NW and WR
So my NW is 3.6M right now 2.5 years in, you can see my previous post for my details.
I'm anticipating up to 85k spend this year and my SWR @3% from when I started was 104k, now at 116k if you do straight 3% based off interest or 106k if you do the Endowment method.
I'm looking to buy some land for a future homesite 5+ years out in a high growth area. I really want to buy soon so I don't get priced out, which has already happened in the first two suburbs of the city I live near.
I've exhausted my search in the area I want & I'm not willing to compromise on the location. So I have to wait indefinitely until the right piece of land comes up for sale.
There's a new housing development construction right in the perfect area, but it means I have to actually buy a house now, not exactly what I want, but maybe I can make it work?
It'll be about 300k at 4.875% interest which comes out to be 15k per year for just mortgage if I put down 20%.
This leaves a little room in my budget for property taxes & maintenance I think?
Forgot to mention that I'm currently renting & not planning to move to this property but I can visit at least once a week or maybe live there for a week every other week until I want to move there permanently?
So how would you look at this since at least for right now it's kind of an investment, so maybe I keep that 60k down payment included in my NW for figuring out my WR? When I stop renting and move there, remove the principle on the house from my NW? At my current NW this would reduce my yearly WR by about 2k.
Do I keep the mortgage, taxes and maintenance as just part of my expenses that needs to be below my WR? If so, maybe I can include additional principle being paid by the mortgage as extra investment for WR considerations?
I suppose I could also rent it out, but they are building so many new homes I'm not sure I'd be able to rent a brand new house & I also kind of waste the new home niceness on a tenant rather than myself. (Hopefully this doesn't sound too greedy).
If I did rent it out, I guess I could think about it as a hedge against the rising house prices there bc even if my house gets trashed by renters, I could fix it up, sell it and buy another one in the same neighborhood when I'm ready to actually move there.
Another consideration is once I leave my rental and move to the house, that'll be a reduction in about 19k per year of my withdrawals, but also my WR rate would drop slightly from subtracting the principle from the house.
This is all so complicated, it's hard to wrap my head around, so let me know how you'd look at this situation.
submitted by WillowGrouchy2204 to financialindependence [link] [comments]
I'm anticipating up to 85k spend this year and my SWR @3% from when I started was 104k, now at 116k if you do straight 3% based off interest or 106k if you do the Endowment method.
I'm looking to buy some land for a future homesite 5+ years out in a high growth area. I really want to buy soon so I don't get priced out, which has already happened in the first two suburbs of the city I live near.
I've exhausted my search in the area I want & I'm not willing to compromise on the location. So I have to wait indefinitely until the right piece of land comes up for sale.
There's a new housing development construction right in the perfect area, but it means I have to actually buy a house now, not exactly what I want, but maybe I can make it work?
It'll be about 300k at 4.875% interest which comes out to be 15k per year for just mortgage if I put down 20%.
This leaves a little room in my budget for property taxes & maintenance I think?
Forgot to mention that I'm currently renting & not planning to move to this property but I can visit at least once a week or maybe live there for a week every other week until I want to move there permanently?
So how would you look at this since at least for right now it's kind of an investment, so maybe I keep that 60k down payment included in my NW for figuring out my WR? When I stop renting and move there, remove the principle on the house from my NW? At my current NW this would reduce my yearly WR by about 2k.
Do I keep the mortgage, taxes and maintenance as just part of my expenses that needs to be below my WR? If so, maybe I can include additional principle being paid by the mortgage as extra investment for WR considerations?
I suppose I could also rent it out, but they are building so many new homes I'm not sure I'd be able to rent a brand new house & I also kind of waste the new home niceness on a tenant rather than myself. (Hopefully this doesn't sound too greedy).
If I did rent it out, I guess I could think about it as a hedge against the rising house prices there bc even if my house gets trashed by renters, I could fix it up, sell it and buy another one in the same neighborhood when I'm ready to actually move there.
Another consideration is once I leave my rental and move to the house, that'll be a reduction in about 19k per year of my withdrawals, but also my WR rate would drop slightly from subtracting the principle from the house.
This is all so complicated, it's hard to wrap my head around, so let me know how you'd look at this situation.
2024.05.21 19:50 BagFormer8019 Withdrawal: stimulant vs Wellbutrin
Withdrawal: stimulant vs Wellbutrin
Which one do you think has a worse withdrawal, if you have gone through both? Or based off of your experience with one and comparing with posts of the other on Reddit? Or just reading posts about both ?
I have been great on stimulants for 4 months with no side effects at all, but Thinking if I should try Wellbutrin instead because of future stopping meds and withdrawal.
submitted by BagFormer8019 to ADHD [link] [comments]
Which one do you think has a worse withdrawal, if you have gone through both? Or based off of your experience with one and comparing with posts of the other on Reddit? Or just reading posts about both ?
I have been great on stimulants for 4 months with no side effects at all, but Thinking if I should try Wellbutrin instead because of future stopping meds and withdrawal.
2024.05.21 19:41 Cee-Bee-DeeTypeThree Emgality and constipation
I've been on Emgality since Oct 31 2023. I've been taking it monthly since and have had a fair bit of luck being on it. I went from roughly 15 migraines a month down to 5-7. I've used Rizatriptan for most of the duration as a rescue medication and it works fairly well but I found that I would have to lay down in bed for an hour or two in order for it to be effective, otherwise it wouldn't do anything other than make me a little drowsy and feel drained. I've recently switched to Nurtec as a rescue but have yet to take one after almost two weeks. Amazing how good it feels to not have a migraine for such a long time! But, I have noticed the Emgality to be linked to a greater problem that I hadn't noticed until just last week. Last week I had horrible abdominal pain and I realized I hadn't been having consistent BMs since starting the emgality. I was so bad I went to urgent care and they gave me the same remedy they give those undergoing colonoscopies to flush me out (xrays showed a ton of stool). It worked and it started to rebound after a couple of days. Since, I've been put on MiraLAX to help keep a consistent BM, and so far things have been going fine. However my Nuero told me to stop taking the Emgality and we're seeking a different option. Doesn't look like Aimoveg is an option due to its chances of constipation too, and Ajovy is not covered by my insurance, nor is Botox. Looks like she's going to fight for me to take Nurtec every other day, but wants me to report back in a week before we get a plan. I have about 10 days before I need to start another Emgality dose, or I'm going to start going through withdrawals so I hope she has something ready right away so I dont have to wait for insurance approval/denial and start going back to how I was premedication while things get sorted out.
I also suffer from dysphagia so swallowing pills is next to impossible. It was hard enough taking the ones I did before my insurance approved of the injections. I took 3 different ones, can't remember the names but they all caused a lot of GI problems and made me feel very tired.
Anyone know of an alternative if the Nurtec doesn't get approved? Basically, the way I see it is if they don't approve the Nurtec as a preventative, I have very little options, or none that I know of. if that's the case, i'm also surely going to revert back to how I was months ago and be forced to file for disability seeing as my insurance is being of no help by not allowing me to try the other medications. I dont want to be on disability but I feel like I will have no other financial choice either. It's not something I can just "tough" through while at work. Migraines are the worst.....
submitted by Cee-Bee-DeeTypeThree to cgrpMigraine [link] [comments]
I also suffer from dysphagia so swallowing pills is next to impossible. It was hard enough taking the ones I did before my insurance approved of the injections. I took 3 different ones, can't remember the names but they all caused a lot of GI problems and made me feel very tired.
Anyone know of an alternative if the Nurtec doesn't get approved? Basically, the way I see it is if they don't approve the Nurtec as a preventative, I have very little options, or none that I know of. if that's the case, i'm also surely going to revert back to how I was months ago and be forced to file for disability seeing as my insurance is being of no help by not allowing me to try the other medications. I dont want to be on disability but I feel like I will have no other financial choice either. It's not something I can just "tough" through while at work. Migraines are the worst.....
2024.05.21 19:17 29Mikusarts (reposting Kathy's back story)
 | KATHY'S BACKSTORY (updated) submitted by 29Mikusarts to HazbinHotelOCArt [link] [comments] Kathy's mother was a newly immigrated immigrant of the United States. She had to live in a poor neighbourhood alongside her dad, but when World War 1 came around, her dad was drafted and she was raped by the soldier who visited her to tell her her father was dead. Shortly after, she had the soldier's child, gave birth to Kathy and left her on the orphanage's cold doorstep before dying shortly of hypothermia. Kathy was born in July 1925 in a dingy apartment with no midwife present and therefore the labour was very difficult for her mother. A cat watched them the whole time; its luminous green eyes were observant like a guardian animal. Kathy grew up discriminated against even in the orphanage and with the Great Depression, she was sometimes forced to eat tin plates to get nutrients and most of the time, she had no food at all. Being acquainted with cats in the back alley, Kathy had a great deal of experience with trash diving and would eat fish bones (after wrangling one from a poor stray cat). Kathy's eyes are monolid and squinted. She also has white skin and plain black hair that made it obvious she was of East Asian descent. This made her even more discriminated against, especially in school, where other kids will taunt her and make fun of her eyes. She scratched her bully's eye once and got expelled for it. The orphanage forcibly locked her in her room for a month and attempted to make her malnourished, but she simply got more rebellious and would leave at certain times through the window like a cat. During World War 2, the discrimination against immigrants was at an all-time high, especially towards Italians and East Asians. Kathy was rescued from being trapped behind a metal fence with barbed wires along with other Asian immigrants and Asian-Americans by being adopted by an American when she was 17, just a month before she would officially turn 18. Kathy’s adoptive father treated her well and even gave her a cat for comfort because she was similar to one up until she turned 18 when she would receive her first “customer” who, in reality, raped her while she was locked up in her room with them. Her adoptive father would later simply dub it as a business regime that all adult girls like her must do. She reluctantly follows this mindset and continues to be pimped by him from that age and onwards. Kathy's adoptive father also had a side job selling cocaine and other types of recreational drugs. He was lucky when a customer related to the Italian mob family residing in America had bought all kinds of drugs from him at a reckless price. Kathy saw the customer's face and it was bruised up; he had a large black eye, scars that were likely from the war, and dead eyes that were twitching from withdrawal. Kathy has amassed a bunch of cats which she adopted, and because of her anxious attachment, she locks them up down in the basement where they are forced to feed off of what Kathy is only giving them and keeps on populating. Kathy actually has killed several of her customers and has witnessed her pimp kill some of them too for failing to fail or doing too much damage. Kathy was influenced by her pimp and only started killing later on. These bodies are always dumped in the basement where the cats will feed on them and eventually develop a taste for human flesh. Once, business was actually going well, and Kathy had forgotten to feed her cats for a month. When she came to check back on them again, several cats were bloody and gruesome and they had developed a taste for human flesh. Kathy died from blood loss due to the injury she obtained from one of her cats pouncing on her and scratching her eye. There was no body to be found that next morning. {Kathy died in December of 1952.} HELL KATHY Kathy arrived in hell and did sex work for a time; her customers were mostly men, but she also didn't mind women. During this time, Angel was also performing sex work and also had a customer demographic of mostly men. They were in the same strip club, but did not find much interest in each other. Angel, specifically, shrugged her off while he was counting bills and snorting cocaine. Kathy met Valentino in hell at a later date than Angel. He reveals to her that he has seen her with her adoptive father (aka Kathy's pimp) and offers to extend her duties in his porn studio along with some other lovely ladies with him. Kathy agrees, and signs her name on the contract, and sells her soul to Valentino and at his porn studio. Kathy was intended to star in heterosexual roleplay porn before lesbian sex became popular and Valentino made use of her in this genre instead. Her past works were left in the dust and her most popular work—that won a Sex-x-xi Award against Tiffany Titfucker—is a hardcore lesbian porn movie. Kathy is an energetic girl with calico patterned fur. She has a pattern of hissing at people she doesn't like but purrs in the present of those that she does like. Her ears and tail have a mind of its own, giving away what she's really feeling if you look close enough. Kathy likes saying “like”. When Kathy was recruited into Valentino's porn studio, Angel Dust originally intended to ignore her, but she took notice of him and called her out on shrugging her off the first time around. Angel Dust says he charges extra for girls which only enrages Kathy. Valentino steps in, much to Angel's dismay and Kathy was all heart eyes for him. Kathy faced a lot of similar abuse to Angel Dust, but the difference is that she was brainwashed into thinking all of it was consensual (+ she was under the influence of the love potion for most of those times). Angel Dust later brings this up to Kathy and she starts to question herself if she's really consenting to all of it. Later on, Kathy form a bond with angel dust and angel dust even introduce Kathy to charlie and the other demon in the hazbin hotel. Kathy really like's the hotel. and the demon's she meet. Kathy even meet the demon king himself "Lucifer". Charlie is just much happier than she is and hoping that Kathy will join to the path of redemption, in Charlie's shocked Kathy dissaproved and said "I'm no where on path of redemption to the heaven, just look at me I'm whore" Kathy then Left to go for a shoot for Valentino as she's walking she noticed angel dust being harrased, Kathy then scratches and bites a guy to his death that was harassing Angel Dust outside of the porn studio once. Angel Dust says he could have also dealt with that himself and shoots a guy who was aiming for Kathy's back. They're even now. Kathy smile at angel dust as they both handle the shark Mafia group and killed them Kathy was the first to get a crush on Angel Dust as angel dust was pursuing Husk, this left Kathy heartbroken but she respect angel dust and didn't intervene with their relationship. The termination came and Adam when down with the other angel's and Kathy help Charlie and angel dust to fight. the battle go on and unfortunately event happened and sirpentious died when Adam shoot him with beam. everyone's from the hotel mourn from sirpentious death. The battle stop when Lucifer came and help Charlie. A years passed after the termination and everyone know that a soul can be redeem and sirpentious is the example. Angel dust and Kathy's journey into the redemption started as they they set out on a journey to take down Valentino's porn studio and set out on a journey to emotionally heal. Kathy love's to admired Angel dust from affar as she respect angel's dust and husk relationship, she's didn't confess as she knew it won't matter. |
2024.05.21 19:00 caffeinatedkoala36 Help
TW for people with eating disorders. And TW in general too, ig.
I (31F) have been suffering from pcos on and off since I was 15. I got my first period when I was 13 and had a fairly healthy run for a year and a half. Cycles started getting irregular once things at home started getting stressful. I live in a small town and didn't get a proper diagnosis for the most part of my life. I suffered from a range of side effects from all the treatments I received(or the lack of). I've been overweight almost all my life and bled out for too long over the years until one day in my early twenties(sometime in 2014) I decided enough was enough and started working out out of sheer stubbornness. My weight dropped to a healthy range and I was eating well, was completely off sugars and processed food for almost 8 years and didn't have any cravings or withdrawals.
Everything was fine until June, 2021. I had a fall and fractured my tailbone, had to quit my job, went through a breakup, was in a crash, endured a couple more back injuries and was caught up in a toxic situation with my family as well. All of this took a toll on my mental health and I spiralled. Food has always been something I turned to when things weren't alright and I went back to binging on unhealthy stuff and my pcos resurfaced in a much more intense way. My weight shot up from 68kg to 90kg(I'm 5'8") in a very short span of time. I bled abnormally heavily almost everyday from July 2021 to June 2022 just because I was kind of bedridden because of my injury and had no support from anyone to get the required medical attention. To add to it, I had to be a full time caregiver for my grandpa since May, 2022 and did not have a chance to prioritise myself in any way. He passed away recently and that loss hit harder than anything ever. The stress set off a whole different bunch of issues.
One of the gynecs I went to before my weightloss was extremely insensitive and was like you're depressed and you're prediabetic. There's no saving you. After a lot of trial and error, I found a course of homeopathic treatment to be helpful for a while but that stopped being effective too. Luckily, the weightloss and the habits I built helped maintain my health for a long time.
The gynec I'm currently seeing has a good understanding of my case and gives good advice too but the past couple of sessions with her have been a little frustrating. She hasn't addressed some of my concerns like chronic fatigue and extreme hairloss saying the weather has been harsh and a lot of people are complaining about the same things. She said we should wait before considering any tests or supplements. She put me on biotin a few months ago but that did not help at all. I started rosemary+rice water for hair because someone told me to give it a try. I tried serums with redensyl & anagain. None of them helped.
My gynec keeps telling me to lower my stress levels and lose weight and I've been trying everything in my power to. I started going on walks, started some low intensity workouts and I've been mindful of what I eat as well. I've been trying to turn things around but nothing seems to be working. I'm currently on birth control. I missed a period for the first time in a decade and when I got one this month with the assistance of meds, it was really painful. I quickly regain the weight I lose. My muscles feel sore all the time. My anemia hasn't improved. Everyone just thinks I'm being lazy and I'm just finding excuses to not workout like I used to or go about my day like I used to. I wake up extremely late, experience brain fog, struggle to fall asleep, feel anxious all the time, feel extremely weak but also nauseated and bloated if I eat something, ibs pain persists, my skin looks lackluster, the hormonal acne are a nightmare if they show up, there's a constant discomfort in my lower abdomen, I get migraines frequently, I'm constantly scared of my bone health and becoming a diabetic, my hair is thinning beyond control and I'm just losing hope.
I finally saw a dermatologist for my hairloss and she advised me to start using minoxidil. She suggested 6 sessions of prp/ gfc treatment along with it and when I asked if the results are permanent, she said I'd have to rely on minoxidil for the rest of my life if I wish to have any hairs on my head. That felt like a huge blow to my confidence because I used to have thick and lustrous curly hair and what I have now is unrecognizable.
Is there anything else I can do to regrow my hair and reverse the effects of PCOS in general too, because this course of treatment might be a bit too heavy on my pocket right now?
submitted by caffeinatedkoala36 to PCOS [link] [comments]
I (31F) have been suffering from pcos on and off since I was 15. I got my first period when I was 13 and had a fairly healthy run for a year and a half. Cycles started getting irregular once things at home started getting stressful. I live in a small town and didn't get a proper diagnosis for the most part of my life. I suffered from a range of side effects from all the treatments I received(or the lack of). I've been overweight almost all my life and bled out for too long over the years until one day in my early twenties(sometime in 2014) I decided enough was enough and started working out out of sheer stubbornness. My weight dropped to a healthy range and I was eating well, was completely off sugars and processed food for almost 8 years and didn't have any cravings or withdrawals.
Everything was fine until June, 2021. I had a fall and fractured my tailbone, had to quit my job, went through a breakup, was in a crash, endured a couple more back injuries and was caught up in a toxic situation with my family as well. All of this took a toll on my mental health and I spiralled. Food has always been something I turned to when things weren't alright and I went back to binging on unhealthy stuff and my pcos resurfaced in a much more intense way. My weight shot up from 68kg to 90kg(I'm 5'8") in a very short span of time. I bled abnormally heavily almost everyday from July 2021 to June 2022 just because I was kind of bedridden because of my injury and had no support from anyone to get the required medical attention. To add to it, I had to be a full time caregiver for my grandpa since May, 2022 and did not have a chance to prioritise myself in any way. He passed away recently and that loss hit harder than anything ever. The stress set off a whole different bunch of issues.
One of the gynecs I went to before my weightloss was extremely insensitive and was like you're depressed and you're prediabetic. There's no saving you. After a lot of trial and error, I found a course of homeopathic treatment to be helpful for a while but that stopped being effective too. Luckily, the weightloss and the habits I built helped maintain my health for a long time.
The gynec I'm currently seeing has a good understanding of my case and gives good advice too but the past couple of sessions with her have been a little frustrating. She hasn't addressed some of my concerns like chronic fatigue and extreme hairloss saying the weather has been harsh and a lot of people are complaining about the same things. She said we should wait before considering any tests or supplements. She put me on biotin a few months ago but that did not help at all. I started rosemary+rice water for hair because someone told me to give it a try. I tried serums with redensyl & anagain. None of them helped.
My gynec keeps telling me to lower my stress levels and lose weight and I've been trying everything in my power to. I started going on walks, started some low intensity workouts and I've been mindful of what I eat as well. I've been trying to turn things around but nothing seems to be working. I'm currently on birth control. I missed a period for the first time in a decade and when I got one this month with the assistance of meds, it was really painful. I quickly regain the weight I lose. My muscles feel sore all the time. My anemia hasn't improved. Everyone just thinks I'm being lazy and I'm just finding excuses to not workout like I used to or go about my day like I used to. I wake up extremely late, experience brain fog, struggle to fall asleep, feel anxious all the time, feel extremely weak but also nauseated and bloated if I eat something, ibs pain persists, my skin looks lackluster, the hormonal acne are a nightmare if they show up, there's a constant discomfort in my lower abdomen, I get migraines frequently, I'm constantly scared of my bone health and becoming a diabetic, my hair is thinning beyond control and I'm just losing hope.
I finally saw a dermatologist for my hairloss and she advised me to start using minoxidil. She suggested 6 sessions of prp/ gfc treatment along with it and when I asked if the results are permanent, she said I'd have to rely on minoxidil for the rest of my life if I wish to have any hairs on my head. That felt like a huge blow to my confidence because I used to have thick and lustrous curly hair and what I have now is unrecognizable.
Is there anything else I can do to regrow my hair and reverse the effects of PCOS in general too, because this course of treatment might be a bit too heavy on my pocket right now?
2024.05.21 18:39 AcanthaceaeWitty74 My parents (M58, F56) have replaced me (M33) with a guy (M28) that I believe is taking advantage of them. What should I do?
Never thought I would be making a post on here, but I only get 3 free therapist visits a year so here I am.
TLDR : My parents have fully replaced me with some guy (M28) they met at work/ church. I'm slightly hurt but ultimately it's their life and they can do what the please. I am more bewildered, and concerned about my parents being taken advantage of.
First some relevant background info:
My parents are VERY religious boomers. by this I mean more religious than you would believe until you actually spoke to them. growing up this created a lot of friction between us. As I reached my teens I became disillusioned with organized Christianity mostly due to the fact that a lot of modern day interpretations miss the point of what is written in the Bible. the hypocrisy I witnessed was rampant among church members including my parents. I strongly disliked their thinly veiled revulsion for any people who they considered "sinners", a title which was doled out on a whim. even while I was in the church it would be weaponized against other church goers and even myself once. a pastor from another church told a girl I was hanging out with that I would lead her to hell, despite the fact that I also went to church. she promptly cut off all contact despite admitting that she didn't want to, but was being threatened with being kicked out of her church groups of she did not.
back to my parents: we were at odds throughout my teen years as I began to avoid church and anything about it. I did not stop believing but I did not want to be associated with their type of toxic Christianity. this was not something they could understand. when I say they are fully indoctrinated it means they are irredeemable in many of their views. they were willing to ignore any and all boundaries I set about religion even to this day. despite me telling them that what they were doing would tear our family apart. in the end they chose religion over their children. my sister is essentially no contact with them.
as a very young child, our family moved around a lot. I was a continual outsider. I had no friends, at all. my parents would say it was no big deal cause I was just a kid and kids don't care about that stuff really, kids don't know the difference, etc. but I knew the difference and I desperately wanted friendship and community. the only constants were 2 hyper controlling parents who wanted a quiet and obedient follower.
eventually we moved to a place where I was able to form solid friendships for the first time in my life. it was , to this day, the happiest time period of my life. this lasted until my final year of high school when my parents decided to move. despite me having many friends whose parents offered me a place to stay for the final year, my parents forced me to move. this caused me to spiral into a deep depression for around 3 years. I developed enduring social anxiety which I deal with to this day. I have made peace with the fact that I will never have a lot of friends, but thinking about what I missed out on is painful. years later I found out they forced me to move because they prayed and God told them it would be better for all of us if I moved with them. we needed to stay together as a family. then 2 years later they moved back to the place they took me from. all I can do is laugh at this because it is so dark and obviously bullshit. when it was my life getting fucked up "God" said ok we needed to stay together as a family. when I needed support he said naw just ditch him and move away.
my life was destroyed by religion. I have since learned that of course, we are ultimately in charge of our own happiness, but at the time I had no knowledge of trauma or therapy. simply 2 parents who reduced every concern I ever had in my life to "just pray about it". in fact throughout my entire life they diminished all of my concerns, big and small. in addition, they would often judge me for everything I did, even if they were innocent to a non religious person. so I would only tell them about things when I absolutely had no other choice. and they would treat them as wholly unimportant. they also believed that men should not be upset or emotional and should figure things out for themselves. so they would help my sister out whenever she needed it, including buying her a new car, while I was riding my bike an hour each way to go to engineering school. there were many points in my life where I was at rock bottom, and despite them having more than enough means to help me, they did not.
compounding this is the fact that all the while they diminished my own concerns, they would bend over backwards to help people not in our family. they always wanted to appear nice and helpful, but this never extended to me. in fact they would often do things to inconvenience me in order to help some random person they just met.
All of these circumstances created a very weird relationship dynamic between us all. I became avoidant, negative and pessimistic for years before I discovered therapy and began to work through my mental health issues. I struggled in many relationships I had, and always felt like I was a lesser person than everyone else. this persisted until around 3 years ago when I began to correct the errors in my thinking patterns. despite therapy, I still struggle to have a relationship with my parents. all they talk about is religion. I have given up trying to enforce the boundary there. there is no point. they don't know anything else. they cannot be different and have no desire to change, in fact they see no error in their actions throughout the years. despite me obviously having issues. they essentially chalk it up to me just being a bad egg. I have since been able to forgive them, but the trauma I experienced throughout my life has left me with tendencies they hate. I withdraw when I am depressed, I am prone to anxiety from time to time, I have ADHD, I distance myself from them because all they do is cross my boundaries to preach at me, etc etc.
Back to the present:
Before my dad retired he hired this guy, let's call him Raj, at his work. just a basic bank employee. he is a nice enough guy I think. a little awkward but nice enough. I believe he has an engineering degree from another country but it got rejected by our country, so he had to just take whatever job he could get. he is new to the country and a bit of a fish out of water, this is the reason I think most people looked past his non ordinary behavior.... I literally cannot imagine myself ever hanging out or going on vacations with my boss, who is 20+ years older than me.
he struggled to understand the job and my dad had to spend a lot of time with him to get him up to speed. he began to go to my dad for life advice beyond work, as he struggled with making friends or getting a girlfriend. I think eventually my parents invited him to church and he went, despite being originally Hindu. eventually he went with them regularly and integrated himself with them to a wild extent that I did not realize until this past weekend when they came to "visit". they brought this motherfucker with them without saying shit beforehand. paid for his hotel and all his food. bought him clothes and took him on errands. all while saying they didn't really have time to assist me; I cannot drive anymore as I began having seizures 3 years ago.
when we did finally hang out, my own parents mistakenly called me his name many times. they acted like a family and treated me like I was just some dude lol.
we went out to dinner with some friends of theirs who were also in town. during dinner they called Raj my parents adopted son. needless to say I was very weirded out. but did not say anything. if I did they would just say I was being negative and I look like the asshole.
I know Raj does not make a lot of money but somehow he was able to buy a small house a year after starting work. I have not seen proof personally but my sister has said she is sure that my pprovided the down payment. this is where I began to be concerned they are being taken advantage of. this is very out of character for my parents.
I have considered also the weirdest possiblity, that they may have some kind of weird ass sugar baby relationship but I simply cannot see that being the case. they are hypocrites about some aspects of Christianity, such as not judging people, but they are 1000% devout when it comes to what they would deem as sin.
I get the impression that they have empty nest syndrome and compounded with their propensity to bend over backwards for non family members, they have essentially adopted this guy. he is at their house several times a week. as far as I know my mom prepares most of his meals.
it appears to me that they found a replacement for me with none of the mental health issues and resentment ( that they caused) and who was willing to play the part of a church goer. I fear now, based on watching them shop together that he is taking advantage of them. If they are just choosing to help him out money wise that is MASSIVELY out of character for them to do so to this extent. this is the main reason I think they are being taken advantage of. they are doing things for this guy they would NEVER do for anyone.
I am not sure how to approach this situation or what to even think about it. I lack the bandwidth to really mull it over or be upset about it. one thing I am certain of is that me saying anything about this will do nothing except make them mad and bring them closer together .they think I am simply a negative person and don't really listen to my thoughts on things, whether I am right or not.they have always treated me like I'm a moron
Is this as weird to you as it is to me? What would you do in this scenario?
submitted by AcanthaceaeWitty74 to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
TLDR : My parents have fully replaced me with some guy (M28) they met at work/ church. I'm slightly hurt but ultimately it's their life and they can do what the please. I am more bewildered, and concerned about my parents being taken advantage of.
First some relevant background info:
My parents are VERY religious boomers. by this I mean more religious than you would believe until you actually spoke to them. growing up this created a lot of friction between us. As I reached my teens I became disillusioned with organized Christianity mostly due to the fact that a lot of modern day interpretations miss the point of what is written in the Bible. the hypocrisy I witnessed was rampant among church members including my parents. I strongly disliked their thinly veiled revulsion for any people who they considered "sinners", a title which was doled out on a whim. even while I was in the church it would be weaponized against other church goers and even myself once. a pastor from another church told a girl I was hanging out with that I would lead her to hell, despite the fact that I also went to church. she promptly cut off all contact despite admitting that she didn't want to, but was being threatened with being kicked out of her church groups of she did not.
back to my parents: we were at odds throughout my teen years as I began to avoid church and anything about it. I did not stop believing but I did not want to be associated with their type of toxic Christianity. this was not something they could understand. when I say they are fully indoctrinated it means they are irredeemable in many of their views. they were willing to ignore any and all boundaries I set about religion even to this day. despite me telling them that what they were doing would tear our family apart. in the end they chose religion over their children. my sister is essentially no contact with them.
as a very young child, our family moved around a lot. I was a continual outsider. I had no friends, at all. my parents would say it was no big deal cause I was just a kid and kids don't care about that stuff really, kids don't know the difference, etc. but I knew the difference and I desperately wanted friendship and community. the only constants were 2 hyper controlling parents who wanted a quiet and obedient follower.
eventually we moved to a place where I was able to form solid friendships for the first time in my life. it was , to this day, the happiest time period of my life. this lasted until my final year of high school when my parents decided to move. despite me having many friends whose parents offered me a place to stay for the final year, my parents forced me to move. this caused me to spiral into a deep depression for around 3 years. I developed enduring social anxiety which I deal with to this day. I have made peace with the fact that I will never have a lot of friends, but thinking about what I missed out on is painful. years later I found out they forced me to move because they prayed and God told them it would be better for all of us if I moved with them. we needed to stay together as a family. then 2 years later they moved back to the place they took me from. all I can do is laugh at this because it is so dark and obviously bullshit. when it was my life getting fucked up "God" said ok we needed to stay together as a family. when I needed support he said naw just ditch him and move away.
my life was destroyed by religion. I have since learned that of course, we are ultimately in charge of our own happiness, but at the time I had no knowledge of trauma or therapy. simply 2 parents who reduced every concern I ever had in my life to "just pray about it". in fact throughout my entire life they diminished all of my concerns, big and small. in addition, they would often judge me for everything I did, even if they were innocent to a non religious person. so I would only tell them about things when I absolutely had no other choice. and they would treat them as wholly unimportant. they also believed that men should not be upset or emotional and should figure things out for themselves. so they would help my sister out whenever she needed it, including buying her a new car, while I was riding my bike an hour each way to go to engineering school. there were many points in my life where I was at rock bottom, and despite them having more than enough means to help me, they did not.
compounding this is the fact that all the while they diminished my own concerns, they would bend over backwards to help people not in our family. they always wanted to appear nice and helpful, but this never extended to me. in fact they would often do things to inconvenience me in order to help some random person they just met.
All of these circumstances created a very weird relationship dynamic between us all. I became avoidant, negative and pessimistic for years before I discovered therapy and began to work through my mental health issues. I struggled in many relationships I had, and always felt like I was a lesser person than everyone else. this persisted until around 3 years ago when I began to correct the errors in my thinking patterns. despite therapy, I still struggle to have a relationship with my parents. all they talk about is religion. I have given up trying to enforce the boundary there. there is no point. they don't know anything else. they cannot be different and have no desire to change, in fact they see no error in their actions throughout the years. despite me obviously having issues. they essentially chalk it up to me just being a bad egg. I have since been able to forgive them, but the trauma I experienced throughout my life has left me with tendencies they hate. I withdraw when I am depressed, I am prone to anxiety from time to time, I have ADHD, I distance myself from them because all they do is cross my boundaries to preach at me, etc etc.
Back to the present:
Before my dad retired he hired this guy, let's call him Raj, at his work. just a basic bank employee. he is a nice enough guy I think. a little awkward but nice enough. I believe he has an engineering degree from another country but it got rejected by our country, so he had to just take whatever job he could get. he is new to the country and a bit of a fish out of water, this is the reason I think most people looked past his non ordinary behavior.... I literally cannot imagine myself ever hanging out or going on vacations with my boss, who is 20+ years older than me.
he struggled to understand the job and my dad had to spend a lot of time with him to get him up to speed. he began to go to my dad for life advice beyond work, as he struggled with making friends or getting a girlfriend. I think eventually my parents invited him to church and he went, despite being originally Hindu. eventually he went with them regularly and integrated himself with them to a wild extent that I did not realize until this past weekend when they came to "visit". they brought this motherfucker with them without saying shit beforehand. paid for his hotel and all his food. bought him clothes and took him on errands. all while saying they didn't really have time to assist me; I cannot drive anymore as I began having seizures 3 years ago.
when we did finally hang out, my own parents mistakenly called me his name many times. they acted like a family and treated me like I was just some dude lol.
we went out to dinner with some friends of theirs who were also in town. during dinner they called Raj my parents adopted son. needless to say I was very weirded out. but did not say anything. if I did they would just say I was being negative and I look like the asshole.
I know Raj does not make a lot of money but somehow he was able to buy a small house a year after starting work. I have not seen proof personally but my sister has said she is sure that my pprovided the down payment. this is where I began to be concerned they are being taken advantage of. this is very out of character for my parents.
I have considered also the weirdest possiblity, that they may have some kind of weird ass sugar baby relationship but I simply cannot see that being the case. they are hypocrites about some aspects of Christianity, such as not judging people, but they are 1000% devout when it comes to what they would deem as sin.
I get the impression that they have empty nest syndrome and compounded with their propensity to bend over backwards for non family members, they have essentially adopted this guy. he is at their house several times a week. as far as I know my mom prepares most of his meals.
it appears to me that they found a replacement for me with none of the mental health issues and resentment ( that they caused) and who was willing to play the part of a church goer. I fear now, based on watching them shop together that he is taking advantage of them. If they are just choosing to help him out money wise that is MASSIVELY out of character for them to do so to this extent. this is the main reason I think they are being taken advantage of. they are doing things for this guy they would NEVER do for anyone.
I am not sure how to approach this situation or what to even think about it. I lack the bandwidth to really mull it over or be upset about it. one thing I am certain of is that me saying anything about this will do nothing except make them mad and bring them closer together .they think I am simply a negative person and don't really listen to my thoughts on things, whether I am right or not.they have always treated me like I'm a moron
Is this as weird to you as it is to me? What would you do in this scenario?
2024.05.21 18:18 INeedMoreOats Seeking participants for my master thesis project!
Hello! This is my first post here so sorry if this all seems too sudden but your help would be invaluable. My name is Nicolò Ghelli, I’m a master student at the University of Bologna (IT) in the curriculum of Journalism and Digital Media, and I’m currently carrying out my thesis project on the possibilities for self-expression and social dynamics in MMOs and their use by people manifesting social exclusion or social isolation. To this end, I’m looking for people willing to participate in an interview of about one hour regarding their condition, their relationship with their avatars and those with other players and the game itself. Specifically, I’m looking for people who: are 18 or more, have been NEETs and/or have manifested social withdrawal for 6 months or more and play MMOs or have played them during their withdrawal.
The interviews will be done via voice or text (text interviews will inevitably be longer) and then unspooled and edited to protect your identity and ensure anonymity. Moreover, participants will be free to stop the interview or to walk away at any moment if they feel uncomfortable. You’re under no obligation to offer your help, though I would appreciate it immensely.
Before you tell me, I know that there are other subreddits specifically centered around people manifesting social withdrawal, but I'm posting this here too because my demographic of interest may be present here as well.
If you’re interested in participating or would like to ask further questions on this project before doing so, you can just reply to this post, DM me or send me an email on my official university address [nicolo.ghelli@studio.unibo.it](mailto:nicolo.ghelli@studio.unibo.it)
Thank you for your time!
submitted by INeedMoreOats to MMORPG [link] [comments]
The interviews will be done via voice or text (text interviews will inevitably be longer) and then unspooled and edited to protect your identity and ensure anonymity. Moreover, participants will be free to stop the interview or to walk away at any moment if they feel uncomfortable. You’re under no obligation to offer your help, though I would appreciate it immensely.
Before you tell me, I know that there are other subreddits specifically centered around people manifesting social withdrawal, but I'm posting this here too because my demographic of interest may be present here as well.
If you’re interested in participating or would like to ask further questions on this project before doing so, you can just reply to this post, DM me or send me an email on my official university address [nicolo.ghelli@studio.unibo.it](mailto:nicolo.ghelli@studio.unibo.it)
Thank you for your time!
2024.05.21 17:50 wsprroc4real Will it pass?
So, I’ve been lurking here for a week or so just trying to find inspiration from your posts, which I have. I have quit drinking around 162.5 times! No one seems to think I have an issue, but I know I do! I want to stop. I really do. I made it 6 weeks at one point, but that’s about the longest. At that time, I became completely obsessed with running and cycling. To the point of a knee and shoulder surgery. That crutch is out the window. I picked up drinking again and have quit 3-4 days at a time a bunch of times! I am at 21 days at this point. I have read all the books and watched all the videos. I grew up around AA and that is not an option for me personally. I have crazy willpower when it comes to most things, but alcohol has me!
I was a very active drinker. I never sat around on the couch and got hammered. I associated alcohol with doing yard work, cleaning the garage, washing the car, cooking etc. I also have what I call a witching hour. It’s normally between 5pm and 8pm during the week and noon to 8 on the weekends. I have a ton more energy, I’m sleeping way better and I’m not wasting my weekends, but this is still pretty painful!
I think because I was drinking while I was doing things at home, I now have zero motivation to do those things without it. I guess my question is, how long will it take to break that? (estimate). During those hours, it’s almost like I’m crawling out of my skin! That’s when I start convincing myself that I can drink in moderation, that I’m just being too hard on myself, blah blah blah.
It pisses me off so bad that a bottle of clear liquid is absolutely kicking my ass! I thought at this point it would have eased up a bit, but to be honest, it actually feels like it’s getting worse. I was anxious and depressed when I was drinking and takeaway the stabbing headache, nausea, and self-loathing, I’m still pretty low! This really started as a question, but I guess I just needed to throw it out in the universe today. I have an amazing life! A wife of 20 years, two brilliant kids, a great career, all the things, but alcohol is still taking up so much space in my brain that I feel guilty for not appreciating the life that I have. I never wanted to wake up and start drinking. Ever! But now it’s becoming the first thing I think about. I’m even dabbling with meditation and an “energy healer”! Do I just suck it up and push forward until this looming cloud passes or does it ever really pass?
Sometimes I wish the folks around me did feel like I had an issue with it, but I guess because I was able to function normally for the most part I hid it. I’m doing all the things. Journaling, exercising, being open and honest, finding support where I can, but I still feel like turning into a 5 year old and just crawling under the bed. Around 4:30 - 5 everyday my throat starts to tighten up, I get irritable, I lose focus and all motivation to do anything disappears. This feels physical, but all physical withdraw should be gone. I think… Thanks for listening!! I will stay sober today.
submitted by wsprroc4real to stopdrinking [link] [comments]
I was a very active drinker. I never sat around on the couch and got hammered. I associated alcohol with doing yard work, cleaning the garage, washing the car, cooking etc. I also have what I call a witching hour. It’s normally between 5pm and 8pm during the week and noon to 8 on the weekends. I have a ton more energy, I’m sleeping way better and I’m not wasting my weekends, but this is still pretty painful!
I think because I was drinking while I was doing things at home, I now have zero motivation to do those things without it. I guess my question is, how long will it take to break that? (estimate). During those hours, it’s almost like I’m crawling out of my skin! That’s when I start convincing myself that I can drink in moderation, that I’m just being too hard on myself, blah blah blah.
It pisses me off so bad that a bottle of clear liquid is absolutely kicking my ass! I thought at this point it would have eased up a bit, but to be honest, it actually feels like it’s getting worse. I was anxious and depressed when I was drinking and takeaway the stabbing headache, nausea, and self-loathing, I’m still pretty low! This really started as a question, but I guess I just needed to throw it out in the universe today. I have an amazing life! A wife of 20 years, two brilliant kids, a great career, all the things, but alcohol is still taking up so much space in my brain that I feel guilty for not appreciating the life that I have. I never wanted to wake up and start drinking. Ever! But now it’s becoming the first thing I think about. I’m even dabbling with meditation and an “energy healer”! Do I just suck it up and push forward until this looming cloud passes or does it ever really pass?
Sometimes I wish the folks around me did feel like I had an issue with it, but I guess because I was able to function normally for the most part I hid it. I’m doing all the things. Journaling, exercising, being open and honest, finding support where I can, but I still feel like turning into a 5 year old and just crawling under the bed. Around 4:30 - 5 everyday my throat starts to tighten up, I get irritable, I lose focus and all motivation to do anything disappears. This feels physical, but all physical withdraw should be gone. I think… Thanks for listening!! I will stay sober today.
2024.05.21 17:28 Quirky-Ad-5931 Should I take some chips off the table?
We are considering buying a house in the next year or two and I am considering what to do regarding saving up for my downpayment. Right now, I have almost the entire amount I could use as a downpayment invested in boglehead style funds (59% VTI 39% VXUS 2% BND). When I started investing like this the goal wasn’t to save up for a down payment but just to Invest for the long term as no bigger purchase was anywhere in sight. So now I am wondering whether I should start withdrawing some from stocks and putting it into treasury bonds to protect the principle for an eventual house purchase. I have stopped contributing to it for now and am saving up a portion of the downpayment in cash.
The options I am considering: 1. sell everything I could use for a downpayment now and put it into treasuries 2. divest the down payment from stocks and into treasuries in a few steps until end of the year 3. just leave it as it is and save the remainder of the downpayment in cash 4. keep contributing to it and save a smaller amount in cash.
submitted by Quirky-Ad-5931 to Bogleheads [link] [comments]
The options I am considering: 1. sell everything I could use for a downpayment now and put it into treasuries 2. divest the down payment from stocks and into treasuries in a few steps until end of the year 3. just leave it as it is and save the remainder of the downpayment in cash 4. keep contributing to it and save a smaller amount in cash.
2024.05.21 17:14 avacado122700 It’s been 3 days w/o vaping and I need your help.
History: -started vaping 5 years ago -went from Juul, to dispos, to Vuse -went through a vuse pod every 2-3 days for the past year -have tried to quit multiple times.
Guys, please leave any tips, stories, or words of encouragement to help me and whoever else is struggling to get through this.
I quit 3 days ago and used a trip to Disney as a distraction which definitely helped, but I’ve been dizzy, nauseous, and craving heavy for nic.
Last night was the worst. I threw up in the middle of the night and also have been having stomach problems all morning. Idk if it’s directly related to the nicotine withdrawal, but I saw a few others had the same issues.
WHEN DOES IT END?? When do the cravings stop, when do I start to feel not sick anymore?
Is it a bad idea to not bring it with my for a week long vacation in Hawaii?? What if it ruins my trip bc I’m miserable without it? Please help with any advice or encouragement or a timeline. I NEED YOUR ADVICE!!
submitted by avacado122700 to QuitVaping [link] [comments]
Guys, please leave any tips, stories, or words of encouragement to help me and whoever else is struggling to get through this.
I quit 3 days ago and used a trip to Disney as a distraction which definitely helped, but I’ve been dizzy, nauseous, and craving heavy for nic.
Last night was the worst. I threw up in the middle of the night and also have been having stomach problems all morning. Idk if it’s directly related to the nicotine withdrawal, but I saw a few others had the same issues.
WHEN DOES IT END?? When do the cravings stop, when do I start to feel not sick anymore?
Is it a bad idea to not bring it with my for a week long vacation in Hawaii?? What if it ruins my trip bc I’m miserable without it? Please help with any advice or encouragement or a timeline. I NEED YOUR ADVICE!!
2024.05.21 17:01 laura-elisabeth Dani said ..
“I am an addict, Gabi!”
Guess what, D. I was too. I smoked cigarettes. I quit. I vaped. I quit. I was a opiate addict. I quit. I was an alcoholic. I quit.
Many other people are addicts, too. You are not the only one. Yours is no better or worse than anyone else. Being an addict is not a death sentence, Danielle. It is a terrible disease. But you DO have a choice. Stop blaming everything else. Choose to get better or STFU.
submitted by laura-elisabeth to scissorsistersdrama [link] [comments]
Guess what, D. I was too. I smoked cigarettes. I quit. I vaped. I quit. I was a opiate addict. I quit. I was an alcoholic. I quit.
Many other people are addicts, too. You are not the only one. Yours is no better or worse than anyone else. Being an addict is not a death sentence, Danielle. It is a terrible disease. But you DO have a choice. Stop blaming everything else. Choose to get better or STFU.
2024.05.21 16:31 Skoldylocks CMV: There is no remedy for "Cancel Culture" that doesn't involve the destruction of freedom of expression
Merriam-Webster defines "cancel culture" as "the practice or tendency of engaging in mass canceling as a way of expressing disapproval and exerting social pressure." It defines "cancelling" as "to withdraw one's support for (someone, such as a celebrity, or something, such as a company) publicly and especially on social media."
So in other words, "cancel culture" is the prevalent trend of people publicly expressing disapproval of a person or entity for a position they hold or action they take, and encouraging people to not support them.
To me, this just sounds like people exercising their fundamental right to pick and choose what to buy and support.
The only remedies to "cancel culture" seem to be "prevent people from expressing their opinions." Otherwise, how do you stop people from organizing to collectively express their disapproval of someone or something? That sounds like a rabbit hole we absolutely do not want to go down.
submitted by Skoldylocks to changemyview [link] [comments]
So in other words, "cancel culture" is the prevalent trend of people publicly expressing disapproval of a person or entity for a position they hold or action they take, and encouraging people to not support them.
To me, this just sounds like people exercising their fundamental right to pick and choose what to buy and support.
The only remedies to "cancel culture" seem to be "prevent people from expressing their opinions." Otherwise, how do you stop people from organizing to collectively express their disapproval of someone or something? That sounds like a rabbit hole we absolutely do not want to go down.
2024.05.21 16:20 Heavy-Ad-6462 I recovered from NEVER getting a period to getting my first one AGED 29!
Hi all,
I just wanted to share my story of primary hypothalamic amenorrhea recovery with you all in the hope that it will inspire any of those who find themselves in a similar situation, as I haven't seen many stories like mine on this sub and I was always searching for them myself when I was going through it.
So, my story goes that I was a normal child and was quite developed for my age around 11/12 and looked as though I would probably start my period within the next year or so, like my mum and sister had done. However, at this age, I developed an eating disorder and also began to run competitive cross country. The development that I had (boobs, hair etc) remained, but as I lost weight, I didn't develop any further and I didn't start my period.
By age 15 I still had no sign of a period and I was still running a lot, even though my relationship with food was a bit better and I had a healthy BMI (19.5). My mum took me to see a gynaecologist who did bloods and an ultrasound which came back saying my oestrogen was very low and that my uterus was not fully developed. The doctor strongly recommended putting me on oestrogen to develop my body and uterus before I reached adulthood and also hoped that the oestrogen might kickstart my period. He wasn't sure of the cause of my primary amenorrhea (this is called primary not secondary because I had never had a period before and so I didn't have one to lose) and whilst he said it could be running, he also said I was a healthy weight and that I should just carry on as normal.
So I did, I took the oestrogen, grew boobs, my uterus developed and I carried on running competitively, like 50 miles a week, aged 15!! (Crazy to look back on and think that I thought this was normal!!) Anyway, surprise surprise, I didn't get a period. By age 17, the doctor decided to put me on the combined pill to induce a withdrawal bleed and make sure I didn't have any issues with bone strength, so I did that, had my first bleed but still did not stop running. The doctor said I was fine, that I should just stay on the pill until I wanted to have kids at which point he would give me drugs to help me ovulate as my ovaries looked fine and my AMH levels were good. Anyway, I just carried on with my life and assumed that I could never get a period on my own.
Throughout my early 20s, I began reading up a bit more about hypothalamic amenorrhea and wondered if it was what I might have, but I couldn't be sure because I could only ever find stories about women who had gotten their periods and then lost it, not people like me who had never even had one. The people who hadn't had one seemed to have issues with their pituitary gland, which I didn't have, so I just couldn't work out what was the matter with me and I felt like a freak!
Aged 22, I was still running but my relationship with food was a lot better, and so I decided to come off the pill again to have a check-up. This time, the ultrasound showed that my ovaries looked polycystic, and so that was the diagnosis I was given for STILL not having a period. But it didn't seem to add up. I had no other symptoms of PCOS (excess body hair etc), my weight was normal, my oestrogen was on the lower side and my LH to FSH ratio was low not elevated like in PCOS, but that's what the doctor said it was, so...you guessed it, I went back on the pill and carried on with my life, which included lots of exercise.
Anyway, in the last couple of years I went through a trauma that meant I quit running completely, and just lived my life. I did lots of walking, ate what I wanted and gained about 10-15lbs taking me from a BMI of 19-20 to 21-22. At this time, I also began to read more about amenorrhea recovery and books like "No Period Now What," and how often people like me can be misdiagnosed with "lean PCOS," especially as I was nowhere near clinically underweight. So, given that I had stopped running and had gained weight, and because my husband and I would like kids in the next few years, I decided to do my own experiment, I came off the pill, and after a couple of months, would you believe it, I got my FIRST NATURAL PERIOD AGED 29 YEARS OLD!!!
I couldn't believe it, I had always had withdrawal bleeds on the pill, but because of what I had been told all my life that the switch in my brain that made me have a period was just somehow broken, I honestly believed I could never have a period on my own. I thought all these secondary amenorrhea recovery stories could never apply to me because I had never had one in the first place, and I just assumed my body no longer knew how to do it, but it DID!! I wish to god someone had just told me when I was a teenager that if I stopped running and gained weight, I would have gotten my period, that even though my body was a healthy weight, it wasn't a healthy weight FOR ME! I feel let down by doctors and sports coaches who encouraged me to keep running and told me I was so healthy, when it could have saved me so much stress, anxiety, and possibly future health issues if I'd just let my body get to be where it had needed to be all those years ago. But I also wanted to share this story to let you know how truly and incredibly resilient our bodies are!! If I can recover after never having a period for 29 YEARS! You can do it too! Hope is not lost and you must have faith in your body's ability to heal. My periods are still quite irregular now, (long cycles between 40-60 days) but I hope they will get more regular over the next year or so and that my husband and I can start a family!
Anyway, I'm sorry for the very long post - but I wanted to share this story with you in the hope that it inspires you to keep going with recovery - you got this!! xxx
EDIT: Overwhelmed by the fact that many of you can relate to this and sending you all the love in your recovery! I just wanted to say that whilst I want this story to be a source of hope and inspiration, my number one bit of advice would be that if you haven’t before this point, it is absolutely essential to see an endocrinologist/gynaecologist for a proper blood and ultrasound diagnosis before you proceed with with self treatment. It’s really important to have a full picture of your ovaries,uterus and hormones to understand the best course of action for you and I really hope that you are able to finally find an answer as I did!
submitted by Heavy-Ad-6462 to Amenorrhearecovery [link] [comments]
I just wanted to share my story of primary hypothalamic amenorrhea recovery with you all in the hope that it will inspire any of those who find themselves in a similar situation, as I haven't seen many stories like mine on this sub and I was always searching for them myself when I was going through it.
So, my story goes that I was a normal child and was quite developed for my age around 11/12 and looked as though I would probably start my period within the next year or so, like my mum and sister had done. However, at this age, I developed an eating disorder and also began to run competitive cross country. The development that I had (boobs, hair etc) remained, but as I lost weight, I didn't develop any further and I didn't start my period.
By age 15 I still had no sign of a period and I was still running a lot, even though my relationship with food was a bit better and I had a healthy BMI (19.5). My mum took me to see a gynaecologist who did bloods and an ultrasound which came back saying my oestrogen was very low and that my uterus was not fully developed. The doctor strongly recommended putting me on oestrogen to develop my body and uterus before I reached adulthood and also hoped that the oestrogen might kickstart my period. He wasn't sure of the cause of my primary amenorrhea (this is called primary not secondary because I had never had a period before and so I didn't have one to lose) and whilst he said it could be running, he also said I was a healthy weight and that I should just carry on as normal.
So I did, I took the oestrogen, grew boobs, my uterus developed and I carried on running competitively, like 50 miles a week, aged 15!! (Crazy to look back on and think that I thought this was normal!!) Anyway, surprise surprise, I didn't get a period. By age 17, the doctor decided to put me on the combined pill to induce a withdrawal bleed and make sure I didn't have any issues with bone strength, so I did that, had my first bleed but still did not stop running. The doctor said I was fine, that I should just stay on the pill until I wanted to have kids at which point he would give me drugs to help me ovulate as my ovaries looked fine and my AMH levels were good. Anyway, I just carried on with my life and assumed that I could never get a period on my own.
Throughout my early 20s, I began reading up a bit more about hypothalamic amenorrhea and wondered if it was what I might have, but I couldn't be sure because I could only ever find stories about women who had gotten their periods and then lost it, not people like me who had never even had one. The people who hadn't had one seemed to have issues with their pituitary gland, which I didn't have, so I just couldn't work out what was the matter with me and I felt like a freak!
Aged 22, I was still running but my relationship with food was a lot better, and so I decided to come off the pill again to have a check-up. This time, the ultrasound showed that my ovaries looked polycystic, and so that was the diagnosis I was given for STILL not having a period. But it didn't seem to add up. I had no other symptoms of PCOS (excess body hair etc), my weight was normal, my oestrogen was on the lower side and my LH to FSH ratio was low not elevated like in PCOS, but that's what the doctor said it was, so...you guessed it, I went back on the pill and carried on with my life, which included lots of exercise.
Anyway, in the last couple of years I went through a trauma that meant I quit running completely, and just lived my life. I did lots of walking, ate what I wanted and gained about 10-15lbs taking me from a BMI of 19-20 to 21-22. At this time, I also began to read more about amenorrhea recovery and books like "No Period Now What," and how often people like me can be misdiagnosed with "lean PCOS," especially as I was nowhere near clinically underweight. So, given that I had stopped running and had gained weight, and because my husband and I would like kids in the next few years, I decided to do my own experiment, I came off the pill, and after a couple of months, would you believe it, I got my FIRST NATURAL PERIOD AGED 29 YEARS OLD!!!
I couldn't believe it, I had always had withdrawal bleeds on the pill, but because of what I had been told all my life that the switch in my brain that made me have a period was just somehow broken, I honestly believed I could never have a period on my own. I thought all these secondary amenorrhea recovery stories could never apply to me because I had never had one in the first place, and I just assumed my body no longer knew how to do it, but it DID!! I wish to god someone had just told me when I was a teenager that if I stopped running and gained weight, I would have gotten my period, that even though my body was a healthy weight, it wasn't a healthy weight FOR ME! I feel let down by doctors and sports coaches who encouraged me to keep running and told me I was so healthy, when it could have saved me so much stress, anxiety, and possibly future health issues if I'd just let my body get to be where it had needed to be all those years ago. But I also wanted to share this story to let you know how truly and incredibly resilient our bodies are!! If I can recover after never having a period for 29 YEARS! You can do it too! Hope is not lost and you must have faith in your body's ability to heal. My periods are still quite irregular now, (long cycles between 40-60 days) but I hope they will get more regular over the next year or so and that my husband and I can start a family!
Anyway, I'm sorry for the very long post - but I wanted to share this story with you in the hope that it inspires you to keep going with recovery - you got this!! xxx
EDIT: Overwhelmed by the fact that many of you can relate to this and sending you all the love in your recovery! I just wanted to say that whilst I want this story to be a source of hope and inspiration, my number one bit of advice would be that if you haven’t before this point, it is absolutely essential to see an endocrinologist/gynaecologist for a proper blood and ultrasound diagnosis before you proceed with with self treatment. It’s really important to have a full picture of your ovaries,uterus and hormones to understand the best course of action for you and I really hope that you are able to finally find an answer as I did!
2024.05.21 15:44 soupgirlsz Second Time Quitting, Vent + More Health Issues - Styes??
Hello everyone
I messed up and started taking FF again after I had quit for the first time. I originally started taking FF soon after I quit drinking as a means to replace that social lubrication function of alcohol, so of course it snowballed from there. I had no idea what I was getting myself into and very quickly fell into drinking 3-5 a day for a few months until I got a litany of health issues and an insane amount of credit card debt. I ended up quitting because it was destroying my relationships (moody, acting insane), my eyes looked so sunken in, my skin looked awful, and I was getting near constant UTIs and horrible urinary retention which I attributed to the kratom. It nearly destroyed my relationship in another way because my boyfriend had his own stint with kratom before I knew him and warned me about it, so something I felt like I had a handle on soon got out of control and I was hiding it from him and so reasonably he was very upset with me. I fucked around and found out. He forgave me, and I spent a week being dope sick and feeling like death and afterwards I never felt better.
Fast forward to now...
I was going through a major episode and felt like my relationship was over and I decided fuck it, I'd rather drink one of these guys instead of having a drink. I just wanted to feel better and I felt so so guilty about it. Obviously I couldn't have just one, it's so habitual, and I'm back in the thick of it. I haven't had the pee problems this time, but I have been hanging out at a kava bar almost every day and got a bad bout of kava dermopathy (crocodile skin) and have had to slow down on that but obviously can't stop FF cold turkey and still be able to go to work, do daily tasks, etc. I need 3-4 days blocked off in order to overcome this and away from my boyfriend to be able to handle the withdrawals on my own without raising any red flags. I feel so guilty.
I mention the dermopathy because my newest condition that I suspect is related to these little shits is styes, which I suspect is kava related this time rather than kratom related based on the limited research I've done. Something about the kavalactones. I've never had a stye in my life, and now all of the sudden after my dermopathy had begun to clear up, I got like 5 styes stacked on top of each other on my left eyelid. My boyfriend popped them despite my pleas to let them be and sort themselves out but I am glad he did, because the relief was unimaginable. My eyelashes were getting caught in it too, making me wonder if it was even an ingrown eyelash, but I dunno anymore... because just as I thought this awful week and a half of having a painful, swollen eyelid was over, I began to get them in my other eye, and another one is cropping up on my under eye of the original eyelid. I feel so depressed and ugly and frustrated and in pain.
I really suspect that it's these fucking FFs, but wondering about y'all's experience and if this has happened to anyone else. Thanks for letting me vent. I know what to do, I just have to find the right timing. Looking for support and others' experiences. Thank you <3
submitted by soupgirlsz to Quittingfeelfree [link] [comments]
I messed up and started taking FF again after I had quit for the first time. I originally started taking FF soon after I quit drinking as a means to replace that social lubrication function of alcohol, so of course it snowballed from there. I had no idea what I was getting myself into and very quickly fell into drinking 3-5 a day for a few months until I got a litany of health issues and an insane amount of credit card debt. I ended up quitting because it was destroying my relationships (moody, acting insane), my eyes looked so sunken in, my skin looked awful, and I was getting near constant UTIs and horrible urinary retention which I attributed to the kratom. It nearly destroyed my relationship in another way because my boyfriend had his own stint with kratom before I knew him and warned me about it, so something I felt like I had a handle on soon got out of control and I was hiding it from him and so reasonably he was very upset with me. I fucked around and found out. He forgave me, and I spent a week being dope sick and feeling like death and afterwards I never felt better.
Fast forward to now...
I was going through a major episode and felt like my relationship was over and I decided fuck it, I'd rather drink one of these guys instead of having a drink. I just wanted to feel better and I felt so so guilty about it. Obviously I couldn't have just one, it's so habitual, and I'm back in the thick of it. I haven't had the pee problems this time, but I have been hanging out at a kava bar almost every day and got a bad bout of kava dermopathy (crocodile skin) and have had to slow down on that but obviously can't stop FF cold turkey and still be able to go to work, do daily tasks, etc. I need 3-4 days blocked off in order to overcome this and away from my boyfriend to be able to handle the withdrawals on my own without raising any red flags. I feel so guilty.
I mention the dermopathy because my newest condition that I suspect is related to these little shits is styes, which I suspect is kava related this time rather than kratom related based on the limited research I've done. Something about the kavalactones. I've never had a stye in my life, and now all of the sudden after my dermopathy had begun to clear up, I got like 5 styes stacked on top of each other on my left eyelid. My boyfriend popped them despite my pleas to let them be and sort themselves out but I am glad he did, because the relief was unimaginable. My eyelashes were getting caught in it too, making me wonder if it was even an ingrown eyelash, but I dunno anymore... because just as I thought this awful week and a half of having a painful, swollen eyelid was over, I began to get them in my other eye, and another one is cropping up on my under eye of the original eyelid. I feel so depressed and ugly and frustrated and in pain.
I really suspect that it's these fucking FFs, but wondering about y'all's experience and if this has happened to anyone else. Thanks for letting me vent. I know what to do, I just have to find the right timing. Looking for support and others' experiences. Thank you <3
2024.05.21 15:42 MyInnerCulture Living Well With Chiari - Without Surgery - Untethering / What do we get out of being sick?
Hello...again. I'm still crusading with everything that has helped me live (mostly) Chiari symptom free for many years, and the next idea I want to share is uncomfortable. It won't feel good to read but if you think it doesn't relate to you I promise you--it relates to everyone and anyone who has a chronic condition or is sick in any way.
Little info about me:
Type 1 Chiari, 20mm. Diagnosed 2016; surgery was offered but not taken. My primary symptom was/occasionally is debilitating head pain from strain/pressure.
Links to my previous posts on the subject:
Living Well With Chiari - Without Surgery
Take a Life Inventory
Reducing Triggers
Improving Overall Health
Now...
Don’t hate me for asking, but…what do you get out of being sick?
No one consciously likes being sick. No one longs for the skull-splitting pain that can accompany a Chiari malformation. No one relishes dizzy spells and nausea and eye sensitivity and poor coordination or the other twenty dozen symptoms that our doctors may or may not take seriously, that there may or may not be treatment for, and that may or may not rule our lives BUT with every illness there is always some kind of advantage.
At my worst, Chiari was the BEST at getting me out of things. Excruciating pain excused me from everything. Family gatherings, friend parties, work events…cleaning the house, taking care of myself, or doing anything other than watching TV and drinking wine. I didn’t have to do SHIT. Because I couldn’t. And the Chiari was permission to give no fucks what anyone else wanted or needed or how they felt about my withdrawal from life. It was the ultimate get-out-of-jail-free card.
I mean, I was miserable…but I was basking in that misery.
I was in so much pain I couldn’t think about how to live better. I couldn’t worry about such things as my weight or the future of my writing or how filthy my floors were. I was barely living. And it was awful.
It was also a way out.
I owned illness above all else. I hated it, but it was MINE. Every coughing fit, every spike of head pain, every wall I stumbled into, every night I cried myself to sleep. Being sick was who I became.
And I would never get well until I stopped being a sick person.
The Chiari had its sneaky tendrils snaked into every facet of my life, like we were woven together in a most elaborate tapestry of illness and pain. To begin healing, I had to untether from it. I had to separate myself from every Chiari strand until every fiber of my being was free.
If it sounds metaphorical, it’s not. It’s literal and simple (though seldom easy). Every time Chiari became a thought or an excuse, that was my cue to change the dialogue. For example, when I was contemplating changing jobs, I remembered my brief stint as a bartender in 2011 and immediately my brain said: I can’t do that anymore; what if I have a coughing fit behind the bar? Limiting beliefs running rampant in my brain needed to get shut down and rewritten into something more supportive, like: I would love to work with animals or in nature. That’s the kind of job I should be looking for!
In that kind of rewrite, I’m not denying that I might encounter pain or discomfort, but I’m choosing not to let pain or discomfort be the focus or run the show. Instead of looking at what I don’t want to experience, I’m putting my attention on the things that I do.
More than changing my thoughts, I had to stop using Chiari as an excuse to get out of living…and everything else…which meant showing up one minute at a time in all the places that I used to avoid, being present with all the people and situations the Chiari had shielded me from.
Or, rather, the Chiari chose for me.
Pandering to Chiari’s whims wasn’t limited to thoughts. It was in every decision I made, every choice to live small, every act to hide and shut down. It was in the purse that I carried (will it fit a water bottle to stave off a coughing fit?), the places that I went (can’t go there, the air in that store is guaranteed to tickle my lungs), the way I spent my time (I can’t visit those friends…I’ll have too much fun and want to laugh and laughing hurts so my head so much), and plans for the future (how can I have children when I can’t even take care of myself?).
Untethering from Chiari took work. And it’s still ongoing. Most of the ways that I have used Chiari to limit myself have been eradicated. My life, as a result, looks vastly different than it did in 2016 at the height of the pain. Today I’m a stay at home mom with a son, I have energy, I take Zumba classes, I write every day, my fiction has been produced by podcasts, I spend time outdoors every day, I laugh (sometimes it still hurts), I go into stores (sometimes) without bottles of water, I don’t drink wine every night (I don’t need to), and I’m free from the anxiety and depression that was once as crippling as the head pain that I only seldom experience. I am living.
If there’s one strand that I haven’t untethered from yet, it’s the fear around getting sick. I am terrified of being around sick people. I can’t even blame COVID, though it certainly contributed to the anxiety. I don’t know if I’ll ever be comfortable with someone coughing in my vicinity, knowing how bad it will hurt my head if I catch whatever they’re hacking up, and I don’t know if it’s necessarily a bad thing to keep my distance when I know someone is sick (I mean, shouldn’t we be doing that anyway?) but I’m trying to be less afraid. Or, at least, I’m trying to be less of a jerk about it when that fear takes over and people don’t understand why their cold is literally my kryptonite.
What I don’t do is use Chiari as an excuse to get out of living. I show up every day in every way and life keeps getting better. Bigger. Chiari Free.
submitted by MyInnerCulture to chiari [link] [comments]
Little info about me:
Type 1 Chiari, 20mm. Diagnosed 2016; surgery was offered but not taken. My primary symptom was/occasionally is debilitating head pain from strain/pressure.
Links to my previous posts on the subject:
Living Well With Chiari - Without Surgery
Take a Life Inventory
Reducing Triggers
Improving Overall Health
Now...
Don’t hate me for asking, but…what do you get out of being sick?
No one consciously likes being sick. No one longs for the skull-splitting pain that can accompany a Chiari malformation. No one relishes dizzy spells and nausea and eye sensitivity and poor coordination or the other twenty dozen symptoms that our doctors may or may not take seriously, that there may or may not be treatment for, and that may or may not rule our lives BUT with every illness there is always some kind of advantage.
At my worst, Chiari was the BEST at getting me out of things. Excruciating pain excused me from everything. Family gatherings, friend parties, work events…cleaning the house, taking care of myself, or doing anything other than watching TV and drinking wine. I didn’t have to do SHIT. Because I couldn’t. And the Chiari was permission to give no fucks what anyone else wanted or needed or how they felt about my withdrawal from life. It was the ultimate get-out-of-jail-free card.
I mean, I was miserable…but I was basking in that misery.
I was in so much pain I couldn’t think about how to live better. I couldn’t worry about such things as my weight or the future of my writing or how filthy my floors were. I was barely living. And it was awful.
It was also a way out.
i was a sick person.
To my core, that was me: SICK. I didn’t realize how bad it was until my husband—who never gets a cold—complained of a virus and my internal dialogue went something like this: What? He thinks he’s sick? What a laugh! He’s not sick. NOBODY is sick like me.I owned illness above all else. I hated it, but it was MINE. Every coughing fit, every spike of head pain, every wall I stumbled into, every night I cried myself to sleep. Being sick was who I became.
And I would never get well until I stopped being a sick person.
The Chiari had its sneaky tendrils snaked into every facet of my life, like we were woven together in a most elaborate tapestry of illness and pain. To begin healing, I had to untether from it. I had to separate myself from every Chiari strand until every fiber of my being was free.
If it sounds metaphorical, it’s not. It’s literal and simple (though seldom easy). Every time Chiari became a thought or an excuse, that was my cue to change the dialogue. For example, when I was contemplating changing jobs, I remembered my brief stint as a bartender in 2011 and immediately my brain said: I can’t do that anymore; what if I have a coughing fit behind the bar? Limiting beliefs running rampant in my brain needed to get shut down and rewritten into something more supportive, like: I would love to work with animals or in nature. That’s the kind of job I should be looking for!
In that kind of rewrite, I’m not denying that I might encounter pain or discomfort, but I’m choosing not to let pain or discomfort be the focus or run the show. Instead of looking at what I don’t want to experience, I’m putting my attention on the things that I do.
More than changing my thoughts, I had to stop using Chiari as an excuse to get out of living…and everything else…which meant showing up one minute at a time in all the places that I used to avoid, being present with all the people and situations the Chiari had shielded me from.
if i wanted to live without its pain, i also had to live without its protection.
Now, it’s true that there are plenty of legitimate physical limitations that accompany illnesses, Chiari included, but the problem comes when you talk yourself out of anything and everything because of them. I could get out of bed, I just chose not to. I could show up in life, I just chose not to. I could write a book or clean my house or have a kid…I just chose not to.Or, rather, the Chiari chose for me.
Pandering to Chiari’s whims wasn’t limited to thoughts. It was in every decision I made, every choice to live small, every act to hide and shut down. It was in the purse that I carried (will it fit a water bottle to stave off a coughing fit?), the places that I went (can’t go there, the air in that store is guaranteed to tickle my lungs), the way I spent my time (I can’t visit those friends…I’ll have too much fun and want to laugh and laughing hurts so my head so much), and plans for the future (how can I have children when I can’t even take care of myself?).
Untethering from Chiari took work. And it’s still ongoing. Most of the ways that I have used Chiari to limit myself have been eradicated. My life, as a result, looks vastly different than it did in 2016 at the height of the pain. Today I’m a stay at home mom with a son, I have energy, I take Zumba classes, I write every day, my fiction has been produced by podcasts, I spend time outdoors every day, I laugh (sometimes it still hurts), I go into stores (sometimes) without bottles of water, I don’t drink wine every night (I don’t need to), and I’m free from the anxiety and depression that was once as crippling as the head pain that I only seldom experience. I am living.
If there’s one strand that I haven’t untethered from yet, it’s the fear around getting sick. I am terrified of being around sick people. I can’t even blame COVID, though it certainly contributed to the anxiety. I don’t know if I’ll ever be comfortable with someone coughing in my vicinity, knowing how bad it will hurt my head if I catch whatever they’re hacking up, and I don’t know if it’s necessarily a bad thing to keep my distance when I know someone is sick (I mean, shouldn’t we be doing that anyway?) but I’m trying to be less afraid. Or, at least, I’m trying to be less of a jerk about it when that fear takes over and people don’t understand why their cold is literally my kryptonite.
What I don’t do is use Chiari as an excuse to get out of living. I show up every day in every way and life keeps getting better. Bigger. Chiari Free.