I'm in the process of emailing potential PIs and was looking for tips online to refine my email structure when I came across a lengthy post on a certain academic subreddit. Essentially, professors are whining about receiving generic cold emails, but what truly sets me off is the blatant racism and lack of empathy. These comments are from a discussion among professors: "I just ignore them; they are just trying to escape their countries." "You're so kind to bother replying; I just block and delete." There are lots of other rude comments about international students, some mentioning specific countries and even making fun of the "broken English." I'm sorry but who exactly do you think you are, and how long ago were you graduate students that you are so incredibly out of touch?
I understand that spamming professors with generic emails is disrespectful, annoying, and appears desperate; But a good number of us are taking the time to read your papers and write individual emails, because we do not have unlimited resources to apply to a million different PhD programs worldwide. We need to find out if our particular skillset is useful in your lab and if there is space for us. I cannot request a trillion letters of recommendation from my professors. I do not have $100k lying around that I can freely spend on grad program fees either. And What gives you the right to comment on an applicant's home country? TF you mean "they're just trying to get out?" I am incredibly frustrated and angry with this system that has placed my career at the mercy of such egomaniac douchebags. I'm going to take a break from emailing for now. Anyways, thank you for reading, this is my favorite subreddit.

Posted on his Facebook page that he is moving to a Communications job at SSU. Thanks for everything Dustin!
On Sept. 11, 2001, a series of terrorist attacks set me on a path to do three things: to correct misinformation as a life goal, to enter a field that in some way improves people’s understanding of their world, and to earn bipartisan respect in how I do it.
I’ve written an untold number of stories across 23 years and been taken to places new and old, familiar and fresh. I've interviewed rock legends, presidential candidates (well... one), and along the way met unforgettable sources ranging from a baby battling neuroblastoma to an elderly Lawrence woman growing a potato in her apartment and naming it like a son.
Of course, this path has had its drawbacks. I was told early on that “being a reporter doesn’t pay well,” and that I was entering a “dead industry” fresh from its collapse in 2008. But, after my first time talking to a doggie daycare that made the Today Show and becoming friends with a cat, I realized the career also paid in memories... amply... and there’s really no place I’ve worked that has created more memories for me than Salem. It’s the beat I’ve worked the longest as a reporter; the most recent Halloween marked my 10th in the city.
It also marked my last.
On Oct. 24, seven days before Halloween, I turned 40. I did so without having yet saved any money for retirement, and while working at least 70 hours per week at two to three jobs for the last several years. The combined paychecks still put me a good bit below median household income for the area — something that comes to mind every time I see a comment online that talks about how people should try living where they can afford to.
There's also a dark side to journalism that has emerged in the last half-decade, one that I’d argue doesn’t get enough attention. It’s one of the few industries that is entirely private while also being fully public-facing — journalists are effectively public officials, without the protections and benefits of being public officials. We take a lot of shots from readers, some of whom would delight in us being out of the job and financially destroyed, and we just chuckle and move on with our day.
For the dark side, there’s also the light. In some parts of the real world, journalists are thanked for their service as if we’re active military. I’ve been compared to nurses working the pandemic, held up as a leader stabilizing a maligned society, and invited to share my perspective and experiences with high school classrooms, podcasts, even Boy Scout troops.
Being a reporter pays well in the memories you collect along the way (thankfully they aren't subject to a tax). To that end, I’ve at times felt wealthy for having the privilege of covering a city like Salem — even with its dark underbelly actively arguing that I shouldn’t have a job or be allowed to exist.
With this double-edged sword equipped for so long, I knew I’d put it down at some point. When thinking about the kind of job it would take to leave the news industry, I found there was really only one that kept coming up in my mind: an opening in Communications at my Alma Mater, UNH. That would honestly be a dream... a position like that opening at a college campus I knew so well. To my fortune, that exact position opened in my backyard toward the end of 2023, on a college campus I know just as well as UNH — if not better.
In early June, I’ll be switching careers as I assume the role of Associate Director of External Communications at Salem State University.
I loved my college experience and always joked that if I won the lottery, I'd go back to school and get a degree in physics, do something nutty with string theory. But really, there’s something about the college environment where I’m most comfortable: everybody is there to learn and grow, and, from each graduate, society receives an opportunity for transformation. The feeling you get walking through a space like that can't really be replicated anywhere else... At least that's the fuzzy feeling I get when walking onto a college campus.
It’s hard to imagine leaving the only world I’ve known professionally and no longer covering the city I love, but I’m not going that far. I’m still working in the same beautiful city and would love for you to say “hey” when you see me out doing whatever. You may also see my byline from time to time, and I think I'd even like to continue doing “the spreadsheet” each night polls are open.
But, for now, this bro is going off the record to go back to school.

Idk where to start... I've been pretty lonely my whole life (almost 35)...in high-school I usually had at least one person to eat with but...hanging out beyond school was so very rarely a thing and usually only if I initiated. In college I got used to eatting alone cuz again, I'd never get an invite out and half the time when I did they already ate...
I was also bullied a bit...and abused at home too, neglected in some ways (and isolated)...in college I kinda bounced around a bit trying to find that group of people I would stay friends with after graduating too...
I graduated, moved a couple times trying to find work, didn't fit in with the bf-at-the-time s friends...moved in with a friend that I later dated for far too long and was abused by them too...
And now...well I have a couple friends but i rarely see them and barely talk -I think we're all kinda just burnt out trying to survive, or they're busy with kids etc
So I'm alone a lot. And still, no one really initiates - its all on me, like I have to beg for scraps of attention. Like no one really thinks about me or wants to include me on anything.
And I have a wonderful partner but he works long hours so isn't as available during the week to even chat much so I end up missing him alot and having a very dull, quiet life at home by myself most of the time. Which leaves me with nothing to talk about anyway. And it hurts.
And I'm trying to be hopeful that I can find ways to get out there, and that we'll be doing stuff where he can introduce me to others, we just need time.
Our town is too small to have much in the way of meetups or whatever...I try to be out at events like the little local punk shows or pride fest or whatever but, people don't generally approach strangers....
It's so easy to be pessimistic. To think -sure I'll meet some people but they won't put an effort to be friends and I'm so tired of being the one to try...I want people to want me. And after 34 years of basically being abandoned or bullied or abused... how am i supposed to put that away and hope it could be any different.
I try to practice mindfulnes, gratitude etc - remind myself that was then, this is now, and it's different cuz you have a partner that truly sees/supports/loves you...and I know/like myself more than before
But I still had to take a break at work to cry a bit yesterday cuz I'm so fkin lonely.

Heres the timeline of events which may have contributed to the waiver being denied and or supports my desire to contest the decision. (20F, England, events covering 2020-2024)
Dec 2020 - a rent waiver was submitted on my behalf on the grounds of ill-health. I did not get to see any documentation over the T/Cs and didn't sign anything. I repeatedly asked/offered to supply evidence of ill-health which I was subsequently told was not needed.
Jan 27th 2021 I vacated the room a day before the deadline - unfortunately I forgot to return the keys. HOWEVER, as much as the keys represent having access to the accomodation, these keys no longer worked as the locks had been changed. I was let into the room that night by security who happened to hand me back the redundant pair of keys and thats where my oversight lay. (In 2022 I am made aware that according to their records I vacated the room a week and a half late (when i finally traveled back to hand in the keys) and the waiver was rejected.)
March 2021 I call to ask for an update on the waiver and I am told "it has been waived". I accept this was most likely someone palming me off and mispoke due to not checking the situation but this is ridiculously irresponsible and dictated my next set of responses. A week or two after this phone call, rent arrears emails ceased. This further affirmed I no longer owed any rent.
Sep 2021 Rent arrears emails resume but I ignore, thinking it was a glitch due to the commencement of a new academic year.
After a few months of these emails I ask about them and I am told the rent is owed, no mention of the waiver, rejected or otherwise. I say I was told the rent was waived and I receive an apology and that the issue would be followed up. I hear no more for several months.
Rent arrears emails restart again, some months later. The case is transferred to STA debt collection and I discuss with them the issues I am having. They pause proceedings multiple times and "close" the case on one occasion.
I also reiterate the same information to the university about: - my doubts over the waiver submission due to no evidence being requested, nothing to sign or T&Cs to read. I was not made aware that in passing the deadline for key hand over I would be liable for the whole term of rent not just the days exceeding the deadline.

• that in coming to a resolution some leeway for the deadline should be accommodated considering I exited the rental agreement on health grounds and ill health doesnt work to deadlines AND limited travel due to COVID made moving out at night, alone with no car as a 20 y/o woman quite difficult.
  
• the keys not actually allowing access to the room so I would like to argue that some leeway should be made again as per their conditions for the room to be vacated and inaccessible, I did not have access to the room anyway.
  
• the irresponsible staff member claiming it "has been waived". Which then dictated my finances since I no longer thought I owed a large sum of money. And later on another member or staff apologising and rent arrears emails ceasing once more.
  
• that i thought it was fair I owed the days of rent after the deadline but not the whole term
  

The uni also claim I was sent an email in 2021 updating me that the waiver was denied. I asked for this to be resent as I do not remember ever receiving such an email and this request was ignored. At least twice my emails were unanswered and many times it took weeks to receive a response.
I communicated these points multiple times to the uni and in the last instance (July 2023) they replied 2 months later with a reduced amount owed, more than halved - but not for any of the reasons I stipulated, for some other reason I cant remember currently (the new amount did not reflect the days of rent over the deadline)
At this point I was completely tired, doubtful of their handling of anything and offended because now they admit that for 2 years they have been requesting over double the amount I owed anyway!
(Not essential to read, just concluding) Its my graduation in 2 months and I do NOT want them to pull me aside on the day because of this - I have no tuition fee debts so I can graduate, I just dont want this to be flagged to the accommodation services that I'll be on site that day. Please, where do I stand here? I realise this has been dragged out so long and since their last email with the reduced amount I have ceased communication, STA call me multiple times a week but no letters or emails. I was admitted to hospital for a month last summer for the same reasons I left the uni halls and I've just had a lot on my plate. The official way is to submit a complaint but since it has been so long I now have to justify why I did not take action sooner i.e. after I received the last email in Sep 2023.

Job hunting in today’s fast-paced and competitive job market can be incredibly challenging, especially for Gen Z and Millennials. These generations are entering the workforce at a time when the landscape is rapidly changing due to technological advancements, economic fluctuations, and shifting industry demands. The traditional career path is evolving, and with it comes a set of unique challenges that young professionals must navigate.
From dealing with the lack of experience that many employers require to staying motivated amidst a sea of rejections, the journey to securing a job can often feel like an uphill battle. However, it's important to remember that every challenge presents an opportunity for growth and learning. By adopting the right strategies and maintaining a positive mindset, you can turn these obstacles into stepping stones towards a successful career.
In this guide, we'll explore practical tips and advice to help you overcome the most common job hunting challenges. Whether you're a recent graduate stepping into the job market for the first time or a young professional looking to make a career change, these insights will equip you with the tools you need to succeed.

1. Leverage Internships & Part-Time Jobs: Gain valuable experience and build your professional network. Internships and part-time roles provide the hands-on experience that employers value.
   
2. Highlight Transferable Skills: Skills from volunteer work, academic projects, and extracurricular activities can be highly relevant. Focus on abilities such as teamwork, communication, problem-solving, and leadership.
   
3. Create a Strong Online Presence: Use LinkedIn effectively, start a blog, or build a portfolio website to showcase your talents. A strong online presence can set you apart from other candidates.
   
4. Tailor Your Resume & Cover Letter: Customize your resume and cover letter for each job application. Highlight relevant skills and experiences, and use job-specific keywords to pass through applicant tracking systems (ATS).
   
5. Network Actively: Networking is crucial. Attend industry events, join professional groups on social media, and reach out to professionals in your desired field. Informational interviews can provide valuable insights and potential job leads.
   
6. Prepare Thoroughly for Interviews: Research the company and role you're applying for. Practice common interview questions and prepare your responses. Demonstrating knowledge about the company and enthusiasm for the role can make a big difference.
   
7. Handle Rejection Gracefully: Rejection is part of the process. Seek constructive feedback to improve, stay positive, and focus on self-care to maintain your mental and physical health.
   
8. Stay Motivated: Set realistic goals, track your progress, and celebrate small wins. Breaking down your job search into manageable tasks can help maintain motivation and organization.
   

Remember, every step you take brings you closer to your dream job. Stay positive, persistent, and proactive. You've got this!
Feel free to share your own job hunting tips and experiences below. Let's support each other through this journey!

JobHunting #CareerGrowth #GenZ #Millennials #WorkplaceCulture #CareerTips #ProfessionalDevelopment #JobSearchJourney #CareerGoals #ESG

This is more for me to work out my own feelings than needing advice although advice would be helpful. I am still debating on if I want to talk this out or let it go. So yeah, as the title says, only one person from my friend group showed up to my (28F) Birthday Dinner. I am primarily coming to Reddit because it is embarrassing and shattering my vision of myself. I fear seeking comfort from my out-of-state friends because I do not want them to think less of me. I have always been deeply aware of how lonely I feel/am. It is one of my biggest vulnerabilities, so should other people be aware of it? or imply it with none of my friends who came to my birthday dinner? I can open up about anything else, but this feels too exposing.
But yeah, my friends did not show up for my birthday dinner, and I am not sure how I feel about it. One person did, but he(M29+) is my boyfriend's(32M) friend more than mine. To be honest, this makes it even more embarrassing. Having to search The Feelings Chart, I primarily just feel abandoned, embarrassed, fragile, disrespected, etc. Watching the door and waiting for your friends to show up while conversing with your partner and their friend is difficult. Suddenly, I was 17 again, only having one singular friend going to lunch with me before having other friends and dropping me off at an empty house. I think my parents were at a sibling's game or tournament. or a party? I am not sure; I just remember being home alone for my birthday a month after a suicide attempt. Or I was back at 11, having my birthday overshadowed by my sister's first communion. Or I was back on my 20th birthday, taking myself to see Captain America: Civil War.
Most of them did not even tell me they were not coming. That is what really hurts. I know my birthday sucks for everyone, time-wise. My parents made that very apparent by pushing any family celebration to Father's Day/my dad's & uncle's birthday. Yet only one of the four got back to me two hours beforehand about being unable to make it because they were tired from preparing for their family member's wedding a week from now. However, the thing is, I had gauged the group chat about doing it this weekend a week ago. To be fair, there were acknowledgments of seeing it, but no one directly responded with a conflict. I even sent a message 24 hours before letting everyone know I made a reservation, and people, again, liked the message but did not directly say if there was an issue. That is what is primarily keeping me from having a conversation with anyone. There was obvious acknowledgment of the plans, but no one asked if they could go.
It is apparent I have a lot of baggage around my birthday. I worry I unconsciously make it a test for people and myself. I saw how much people love and value me and based my self-worth and relationships on that. Possibly hope they do not show in a sick way of confirming my deepest insecurity. The rationale part of me acknowledges that it is a lot to put on someone, and things, unfortunately, just do not work out sometimes. On the other hand, this is the third event I have planned as the host where people were busy and canceled at the last minute. Usually, I would just take that as a sign of people not wanting to be friends, but some of them were legitimately interested in it when I briefly discussed it in April. Furthermore, they keep inviting me to their events.
Fundamentally, I do not know where to go from here. Only one of them has reached out, apologizing for not communicating more and saying that they will celebrate at a better time, while the other two have been silent. I think I need more time to process it before having an actual conversation with anyone about it. I am still primarily in the hurt phase, and no communication will be about their actual behavior. For example, with the apology, I was dishonest and said no worries. I wish I did not do that; it caught me off guard, but I did not want it to sit for too long and have them think I was ignoring them out of malice. If I had been in a better headspace, I would have responded with a thank you, acknowledged reading their message, and just be honest about needing more time before talking about it. I just feel sad.
Added context: We are all in graduate school. This is their last quarter before graduating, so they are legitimately busy and finishing up their practice experience/integrative projects and applying to fellowships. Ages range from 25-30.

I 21M got dumped about a month ago, I’ve been having a rough time since. However for the last couple years probably I think I’ve been pretty gross towards women. I go to a small state school and am majoring in music. I started late after I kinda failed to get recruited during Covid. I only got in through athletics and I lied about a lot of shit to get in. Since then I quit the athletics team and have devoted my time to music and doing as much as I while I’m here. Or that’s what I would have said prior to a month ago.
I might get judged for the rest but I’m not perfect. So I learned a lot from this senior. When I first met him he was dating some chick. Then when we got close he had dumped her. He spent every Sunday running Theory and stuff so I could do better in ensembles. Then after a performance he went on a 6 hour long manic episode while we did shrooms. I was off the same amount as he had. However I’m like 6’4 and 200 pounds, he was like half that. He started bringing up his ex though. He’d whisper her name. Dude was in a time loop by his own account. I kinda stopped chatting after that, he graduated in the winter. I’ve only seen him once since.
So I dated his ex, I kinda just got the vibe that I could if I wanted to when I met her in classes this semester. It honestly was for a time the best relationship of my life. I believed I could be happy with her in the future. I think I actually liked her. I didn’t constantly tell myself that it can end whenever. She however 2 months in decides she has commitment issue and dumps me over text. It about to get worse, my roommate liked the senior her freshman year. But my ex ended up dating him. For some reason despite my roommate having some troubles with this my ex kinda set us up. She got me invited to a party, I wish that night had ended with my ex in my bed. At 2 in the morning my roommates comes home after the party, and slams on my door demanding that my ex leave. She even said that she would open if wouldn’t after I told her that I’m naked. This was the first night my ex and I had been together, and Jesus Christ my roommate fucked me. The night created a reason for us to keep talking, and I used it. I already had dirt on her ex, but then she gave dirt on my roommate. Now it has been 4 months.
I’ve been miserable ever since. I have panic attacks at school, and spend every minute of free time just being sad. My grades definitely got hit. However I won a scholarship this semester, and things academically are the best I’ve been in my life. I have opportunities to do thing I never imagined, and even now those things make me happy. However my time has been spoiled as off late. I know I should come back here. It’s been a great deal for me, and all that. However, I really don’t want to. I’m really tired of the way I feel here and I would like to be happier if I can. I was single before but I’ve never really been dumped. I have done well for longer periods however if she’s near, it can cause me to panic. I’m angry, but mainly I just feel like I’m and idiot who can’t get over a girl who dumped me over text.
I am scummy though. I haven’t gone a week straight without a women in the department buying me food. I always know what I’m doing when I’m doing it. Every time I act surprised and very thankful, but it’s kind of becoming normal. I’m beyond appreciative of it, I just feel gross sometimes. There was another girl in the program before my ex. Who I found attractive. She had gotten dumped in February and we matched on tinder, but she had looking for long term in her bio. So I didn’t hit her up. Then the next week the party would happen. She’s in a class with me, our teacher messed up the finals dates. A few assignments became due earlier than said (fucking crazy I know). So I texted her I would be in the library.
I hate how I think. I know it takes 2 to tango. I’m like a fucking terminator. Even if I’m not thinking about it in depth, I just keep making these things happen and I usually am aware that I’m doing it. I don’t know how good I am at not acting in selfish interest.
Im rebounding. This girl who is supposedly good friends with my roommate, has seen me having a break down at school over my ex like last week. Why? I think I might be evil or something. . I enjoyed spending time with her tonight. I feel bad that she didn’t reject me to be honest. I kinda live off validation from women. The university hasn’t helped with this.
Am I broken? Like I’m starting to think there’s something wrong with me. I’ve had no issue just making things more gross around my friends. Do you think it’s a bad idea to return in the fall? I’m afraid given my track record I might end up making people around me mad. If I don’t have any support I don’t think I could stay. My roommate buys me food often, and she has listened to me be more sad than I have any right to be. I again feel gross, and I fear that it might be time for me to stop doing this. To be honest I just wanna run and forget. It’s probably my fault I feel this way.

Hi guys,
I [31m] feel like my partner [25f] is constantly on my case about not doing enough, or not giving enough.
I had a pretty shit start to life which meant that i started off on the backfoot, however I managed to graduate a MSc Computer Science last December and I have been looking for a graduate job ever since. I've had numerous video interviews, but I've been rejected by all except one place that has invited me to an assessment center in June.
About 6 weeks ago I applied for two companies that I really like the look of. One in defence and one in maritime services. Both looked like amazing opportunities and I was lucky enough to be invited to an interview for both. It was nice to finally have companies call me back, you know? Anyway, I had my interviews and prepared for them both as best I could. I felt like the interviews went very well, but unfortunately I got rejected by both companies on the same day last week.
I'll be honest, it broke me. I was really, really upset about it and began to feel completely hopeless, useless and defeated. I worked so hard to get educated, did the best that I could, got very high grades, but it feels like it has all been a waste of time.
I cried like a baby when I got those rejections and felt absolutely broken. My partner supported me through it and said to me "it isn't your fault" and that it's just a shit economy at the moment.
Fast forward to this week and my partner calls me (she's away visiting her parents). It started off fine at first as we were both talking about plans for the future. Basically, the conversation spiralled and she started saying that I'm not doing enough, that's its a males job to provide financially and that I'm not trying hard enough to get us ahead. I showed her this spread sheet I've kept that lists every single job I've applied for and what stage of the application I made it to. There are 128 jobs on that list. I felt so hurt because when I was super upset about my rejections last week, she supported me and told me none if it was my fault. Yet here she is insinuating that it is. I point this apparent hypocrisy out to her, and she says "it's always partially your fault".
I've applied to every single job available in this area and city a couple of hours away. Then she said that I don't work enough currently (I'm a healthcare worker). I remind her that I work 3x 12.5hr shifts per week which is about the limit of which I can handle tbh. I'm wiping ass and coping abuse all day, it isn't easy.
She then rebutted me by saying "what about last year when you were only working 2 shifts per week". Wtf, I was studying a Masters degree so of course I was working less. And during my dissertation I was studying roughly 6-8 hours. In my view, doing a MSc full time during the week and working 12 hours on Saturday and Sunday is commendable, and I was the only student in my cohort who worked as much as I did. Most just lived off their student loan. Yet here I am, being made to feel like I was a lazy pos. I feel like she had absolutely no appreciation for just how hard i worked tbh.
when I asked her "what would you do differently in my shoes?" She was unable to answer. Crickets. I would have expected her to be able to list exactly where she could see room for improvement, but nope. Then she brought up how I don't "contribute enough to the household financially or with chores". She makes this argument from time to time and it infuriates me. I pay more than 50% of our bills and more than 50% for groceries. I effectively bought a car for her to use almost exclusively (every day drives to her uni, or work, or her stables). She has possession of the car around 95% of the time, yet I've been paying atleast 70% of the running costs of it (and boy did the thing need some work over the last 2 years). But she completely disregards that because it doesn't contribute to our standard of living. Whatever the fuck that even means.
So I say to her, what about all the trips I've taken you on? Last year I took her to Australia, I paid for everything. She said "that doesn't count because it was to see your family". I then said how about me taking you to Greece the year before last? Or me taking you to Sweden, Denmark, Germany, Switzerland and Italy on a road trip the year before that?
Do you know what her response was? "You see I don't like when you pay for these holidays because you always end up using them against me". WTF! She literally complained that I don't contribute enough financially! Ugh what is this logic even?
Then she moves on and says I dont do enough chores. I bought this hook line and sinker when we first got together, but I've really stepped up my game in the last two years. I pointed out that I prepare us meals, I vacuum, I do dishes, walk the dogs, dust, put my shit away, keep the mirror clean, you name it. She always has a clean flat to come home to.
But she says "it's not to my standard so I don't consider it done". Wtf? Absolute bs, I pay far closer attention to detail that she does. I do a very thorough job.
Basically, my partner makes absurd criticisms of me that I do not think have any basis in reality. How should I handle this? Because I do love her, but I'm really finding this aspect of her personality very jarring, unfair and difficult to deal with.
Also, sorry for the huge essay. I really needed to vent tbh.

Hello All,
they say play stupid games, win stupid prizes. I won mine last weekend when I was coming from Rotterdam in a Flix Bus. I have never done any such thing like this before. my stupid mind thought its not a problem since now its legal in Germany as well and my mistake is first I did not care to confirm, second why the fuck I was bringing the cake. I was travelling with my wife and thought it would be fun to try this cake at home, the bus was stopped at the custom check point, they lined up everyone with the luggage and brought a dog to smell everyone's luggage and of course the dog did what he is trained to do. they took the cake, my information, told me that they are now starting a criminal proceeding against me and asked me if I had to say anything about it, I said sorry so they wrote no comments I think. I asked if I am in trouble, they said you will receive a letter in couple of months with a warning but if I am caught again, I am surely in trouble (never going to happen). I embarrassed my wife in front of the whole bus, this is certainly one of the worst decision of my life which unfortunately can never be undone. We are Asian people, I was hoping to apply for a PR soon and recently cleared my theory exam for driving, additionally, I have invited my parents to visit me on visit visa, literally the worst time to commit this crime. Not sure how this will have an effect on these things. Is it going to be in my Criminal Record which is usually asked by a new employer? How will it effect my PR application or my driving license application or my parents visa? Will I have problem at the custom check in the airport when I am trying to enter Germany? The deed is done now, all I am left with is the regret. I am a big overthinker which is killing me since it happened. anyone who has experienced this before?

Writing a letter or a postcard is an invitation to to enjoy those moments of life when emotions danced on paper.
I write poems and sometimes at night when I look at the moon or the empty sky, a deep longing rises within, to write to someone. To write about everything that comes to my mind, to write about me, my thoughts and feelings.
At times when I don't write it, I keep on thinking over it for a long time and then it turns into a poems.
I wish to exchange letters and keep them saved in a folder.

"I love "Star Trek" deeply because of its radical, aggressive optimism. It envisions a world, and a form of entertainment, that downplays conflict. Drama and power can come from elsewhere. The future, "Trek" always declared, was going to be populated by nerds, miracle tech, and egalitarianism. And what's so funny about peace, love, and understanding?"
Witney Seibold (SlashFilm)
Link:
https://www.slashfilm.com/1582617/star-trek-changed-my-life-forever-reigns-as-greatest-sci-fi-franchise-of-all-time/
Quotes:
"Like many Trekkies, I came to "Star Trek" at an early age. Throughout the 1980s, reruns of the original series would air on my local station (KCOP, channel 13 in Los Angeles), and they would serve as a periodic video backdrop to our dinnertimes. As a child, "Star Trek" was merely an action-light, horror-heavy sci-fi adventure series, and my older sister and I would gleefully yell out when Spock (Leonard Nimoy) performed his notorious Vulcan nerve pinch, or when Captain Kirk (William Shatner) got to snog an itinerant babe. We would hide our heads from the monster of the week; like many, I was terrified by the scowling face of Balok, the Ted Cassidy-voiced puppet alien from "The Corbomite Maneuver" (November 10, 1966).
Perhaps unusually for a child, I wasn't powerfully drawn to action, fights, or explosions in my entertainment. I would indeed watch the era's toyetic wartime cartoons like "Transformers" and "G.I. Joe," of course, but I didn't care deeply for the characters, nor have much invested in their dramatic stakes. I had trouble taking the "oorah" action seriously, perhaps already innately understanding that the cartoon soldiers were fictional and their triumphs were only temporary; what is the meaning of a victory when the bad guys will merely return the following week?
I only realized this in retrospect, but "Star Trek" was secretly providing an antidote to the breathless mayhem oozing from every pore of my generation's childhood entertainment. It was a series that, despite bad guys, monsters, and fights, was ultimately teaching intense lessons of diplomacy and leadership. The crew of the Enterprise weren't "violent/cool," and I liked that. Finally, I realized, here was a show about pacifism.
And, yes, "Star Trek" communicated themes of pacifism. It might have been a fluke of 1960s special effects budgets, but "Star Trek" rarely showed the USS Enterprise firing off its weapons or getting into full-scale starship battles. The common playground pop culture query of "who would win in a fight?" seemed churlish with "Star Trek." Would Kirk win in a fight with, say, Han Solo? Even as a wee bairn, I had to ask why Kirk and Han Solo would be fighting in the first place. I figured Spock would merely ask Han Solo about his ship while Kirk invited him in for a meal. Power, "Star Trek" argued, wasn't derived from one's ability to dominate and overwhelm others with tactics and weapons prowess, but to negotiate, adapt, and remain friendly.
[...]
Whether "Star Trek" taught me to be a pacifist or whether I was already a pacifist can be debated, but creator Gene Roddenberry and I were definitely on the same wavelength. "Star Trek" took place in a post-war universe at a time when humans had outgrown the need to kill each other for resources, and petty political grievances were a thing of the past.
[...]
Star Trek is for nerds, and that's a good thing
While it may be a cliché, I still maintain that "Star Trek" is for nerds. That is, I should hasten to add, a high compliment. With the release of "Next Generation," I was given my clearest, most refreshing draft of action-antidote. I began to realize that the rest of the American viewing public longed for conflict and war and action in their entertainment, with boys my age constantly raving about the latest 'splosion-fest that evoked the word "awesome."
Meanwhile, over on "Star Trek: The Next Generation," the universe had already graduated, moved into the stars, and gave up on action altogether. Oh sure, Commander Riker (Jonathan Frakes) was handy with a phaser, Worf (Michael Dorn) could murder you with a bat'leth, and the USS Enterprise-D needed to employ some sneaky battlefield tactics to outgun the Borg (or any number of other opponents), but one always got the sense that weapons and fights were a last-ditch tactic, a formality that must be seen through before an understanding could be reached. War was to be avoided at all costs.
What's more, there were classical references! Whenever Picard quoted Shakespeare, my heart would sing. By the time I turned 13 (when NextGen had just finished its fourth season), I too was getting into Shakespeare and Picard emerged as a teacher, a fictional professor that you didn't want to disappoint. I finally realized that the nerdy sci-fi technicalities of "Star Trek," along with its classical obsessions, workplace propriety, devotion to diplomacy, multicultural mindsets, and ability to brainstorm open-minded solutions to complex problems ... these were all aspirational states. Scoop in a few ethical dilemmas — racism, euthanasia, gender politics — and "Trek" gave me everything.
Star Trek obsession is healthy, actually
Like with the original series, the peacefulness of "Next Generation" could easily have been a product of its budget; without the money to stage massive phaser battles, fights and scrapes rarely rose above the skirmish level. This, by necessity, required the show to de-emphasize violence. The makers of "NextGen" also couldn't afford to visit alien worlds regularly, forcing them to shoot on the same six or seven sets week after week.
The limitations, however, allowed Trekkies to enjoy our time on board the Enterprise. "Star Trek" is, after all, a workplace drama above anything else, and we loved seeing the characters do their jobs on an day-to-day basis. We lived with the Enterprise crew long enough that we started to get a sense of how the ship worked. That, in turn, led directly into fantasies of living in "Star Trek," knowing we could operate the machinery if asked. It also didn't seem so terrible to live in a world that was devoted to science, peace, and diplomacy.
[...]
When J.J. Abrams' 2009 "Star Trek" reboot film came out, the franchise was altered to be one of the usual action flicks that "Trek" previously eschewed. It appealed to a mass audience. Conversations began as to what constituted "real Trek," leading directly into additional conversations about gatekeeping, fandom, and franchise evolution. Is "Star Trek" for nerds, or can it appeal to — for lack of a better term — jocks?
Conversations between Trekkies in the 1990s were impassioned, but rarely caustic (at least in my experience). In 2009, however, notions of fan toxicity were more openly acknowledged among pop obsessives, and people became angrier about their obsessions. All of a sudden, I was an "old school" Trekkie.
I was 31 and okay being "old school." After all, decades had passed since "Next Generation," a series that responded to Ronald Reagan and flourished during the 1990s. Why shouldn't it adjust again? I didn't like the franchise's actioned-up response to 9/11, but I was still happy to have debates as to what "Star Trek" meant and what modern action films communicated.
"Trek" taught me to negotiate ... about "Trek."
What Star Trek means today
I am on record with my feelings about the Paramount+ era of "Star Trek," and I have frequently been rather critical. I want to go on record, however, that my criticisms are not based in misplaced nostalgia, prejudicial hate against new "Star Trek," nor a gradually closing mind (an unfortunate affliction that can sometimes strike people rounding middle age). Indeed, I have liked a great deal of the "Star Trek" shows that have debuted since 2017. I think "Star Trek: Lower Decks" perfectly balances humor and irreverence with notable "Star Trek" themes of growth and maturity. "Lower Decks" is about lower-ranking officers who have the crappiest jobs on a Starfleet vessel, and struggle to grow up when they have a twentysomething's instincts toward laziness and bad decision-making. "Star Trek" is about adults, and "Lower Decks" sees people becoming adults.
Likewise, "Star Trek: Strange New Worlds" returns to an episodic structure, allowing for miniature dramas and handily-packaged morality plays to be presented more cleanly than the broad arcs of "Discovery" or "Picard." I only wince at "Star Trek" when it violates its own principles or lazily falls into action-based stories that (perhaps unwittingly) glorify combat, war, and aggression. And make no mistake, these kinds of stories were always part of the franchise; they didn't start in 2017.
I love "Star Trek" deeply because of its radical, aggressive optimism. It envisions a world, and a form of entertainment, that downplays conflict. Drama and power can come from elsewhere. The future, "Trek" always declared, was going to be populated by nerds, miracle tech, and egalitarianism. And what's so funny about peace, love, and understanding?
War was our awkward adolescence, "Trek" said, and our adulthood is in the stars."
Witney Seibold (SlashFilm)
Link:
https://www.slashfilm.com/1582617/star-trek-changed-my-life-forever-reigns-as-greatest-sci-fi-franchise-of-all-time/

Hi I have a boyfriend whos mom doesnt like me. I havent seen his mom in person yet but we had talked once on the phone. I thought everything was fine cause in the relationship its always 50/50 in everything. We take this fair. I got my own job, business and studies at the same time while my boyfriend had already pursued his career. I never asked for money or anything. When we go on dates I made sure that I will have my part of share. Now, his mom doesnt like the idea of me and him going on a date and idk why. Everytime there is an incidents she would sort of blame me that it happened. On my part, I really would get hurt cause I did not even do anything to upset her. I understand that she doesnt like me but what I dont understand is her reason of getting upset to me. There was this one timee that my boyfriends wallet was been snatch on his bag while we are walking and I heard his mom on the call blaming me for it. She even said that is it fine and she would understand if I was not there but I was there thats why shes angry. I told my boyfriend that its gaves an impact on my being that his mom is acting like that to me. He as a guy close to his momy and is confused since he doesnt want to choose. I was not referring on to whom he choose but I hope he would make his mom understand that I am not the type of woman she might be thinking of. In my side of family we really had this culture of family gathering. That even the boyfriends and girlfriends are always there invited. This last occasion I have was giving me mental breakdown cause it was a very big deal on his mom. That even on a family gathering that is not tagged as my birthday or graduation or any other occasion, he was there. His mom was upset that he went there and asked if it is my way of making sure that I can just see him if I want. Idk it is confusing me. Am I the bad guy here.

Two years ago my best friend invited me to his university graduation in july, and even asked me to be in his photos beside his family (we had been friends for seven years at that point). I was very honored, but he invited his boyfriend too.
Now, I had never met his boyfriend before, but I knew my friend loved him to pieces so I tried my best to get along with him (I'm not very socially skilled). We got along great, but I think I tried too hard because after my friend graduation he started being very cold with me.
I think it's important to say I moved away for university after high school (We live 3 hours away) and the only form of communication we shared was through texts, and I'm a bad texter but I have always tried my best for him.
After his graduation he started being cold with me. His answers to my texts were short and icy for months until he stopped answering me. I think maybe I talked to his boyfriend too much, or I didn't pay him the right amount of attention in his graduation, but I'm not sure because when I asked him what was wrong, that he could tell me what did I do he insisted that everything was fine. That nothing was wrong.
That year (2022) he started ghosting me in september and then started texting me pictures and videos about cutting bad people from his life and resenting others in the first days of february of 2023. Which were very obviously things he thought about me. To this day I don't know what I was supposed to answer to those texts (I only sent back sad faces).
And then that month in valentine's day he suddendly started acting normal again. And he even asked me why I hadn't send him a Happy Christmas and New Year text in december (which I had been doing since we were sixteen). Honestly, I cried of anger that day because I had actually grieved our friendship already.
I went to visit him somewhere that year for his birthday in May, to test how he acted in person. We went out to eat but it was a very tense hang out. After that, thinking about fixing our friendship and about what should I say and what not (to not upset him) made me so anxious that I ghosted him after May until October(not my best move)
He started sending me again passive agressive images about bad friends but started talking to me again anyway. In December I went to visit him and the two of us went to his town fair. It was less tense, but our relationship still felt very stilted.
After that we texted until early february, and then he ghosted me almost two months until the end of march to wish me happy birthday. Which I answered with ghosting him until this month to wish him happy birthday too.
I feel very guilty about ghosting him but my mental health has been a mess this year, and thinking about texting him has only made me anxious since his graduation. I don't know what to do anymore, or how to talk to him. I don't even know if we are still friends.

So. I graduated high school in 2021 with a low GPA like..lower than a 2.5 I believe. Covid was a big thing and it really didn’t help me at all along with some losses I had. Can I do anything to make up for the low gpa to further my acceptance? I’ve thought about working at my birds veterinarian’s office would she be able to write me a letter of recommendation for pre vet school? (only with her comfort and permission) I’m really embarrassed of this GPA and i’m aware it can’t be changed after graduation but i’m told I can make up for it I just don’t know how and I really don’t want to give up on this. I have a passion for vet med I just have to do something and I hope it reaches the right people.

Does anyone feel like the school takes forever to respond to program-specific matters?
I have completed all courses for my degree this term but haven’t received any information about graduation eligibility. I did a progression check last term and have cross checked the program handbook a few times, so pretty sure I am graduating this term.
Talked to staff at the Nucleus Student Hub, and was told that they can’t help me with it, and I should submit an enquiry to my faculty. I then submitted an enquiry form about this, but it has been 3 weeks without an update.
Worst thing is I need the completion letter to apply for a postgraduate scholarship by end of the month. Not sure what I could do at this point. Much appreciated if anyone got any advice.

So basically - I just graduated college and started this corporate job around January. I meet my coworker, and immediately I find that I have a huge crush on him. We trained together, so we were in the same room for about 5-6 hours a day for about 3 months or so. We hit it off pretty well - had a lot of hobbies in common and had endless things to talk about. He was so nice to me, and I definitely felt ~something~ being reciprocated. Me personally, however, I don’t like to cross the boundary from coworkers to lovers so I was going to let this crush develop into a friendship and nothing more. Our desks at work are also right next to each other.
We started hanging out after work - mostly me initiating but he would always be there. The first time we hung out he needed a favor from me and I offered. He was very comfortable asking for favors so I’m not sure if I was being used. (Sidetrack sorry) He also just got out of a 6 year relationship around 9 months ago, so probably still carrying some emotional baggage from that. He also never had any true female friends before me, or so he admitted. We had a deep emotional connection as well - and every time we hung out we got to know each other on a deeper, more personal level. Literally our deepest darkest secrets. (Past relationships, family relationships, trauma, life goals etc.) People around us started asking if we were dating or a couple and we would both shut it down each time. Whether or not he liked me isn’t really important anymore, because shit went down lol.
So a couple months into the friendship, he invited me out to the bars with all of his friends and his brothers. (He invited me out because I knew his brother from high school) I was the only girl, so I was very anxious. It was fine until he had to go take care of his drunk brother home and he was planning on coming back, so it was just me and his friends for a good hour or so. Again, also fine, I’m very social and I had a couple drinks in me by then so it wasn’t really a big deal. I had gotten to know his friends well enough at the pregame. They start coming up to me and start to hype my coworker up, and then they start telling me how the entire friend group knows that I like him. I’m obviously not sober so I admit to it, and then his friend starts to turn me down. I was so confused. I wasn’t planning on dating my coworker, or hooking up with him. That’s not the type of person I am, and he knows that too. So it was weird to me that his friends are now turning me down when I didn’t even say anything. I wasn’t being sloppy drunk and I wasn’t all over him. I gave no indication that I was interested in him.
I’m so humiliated that I go to the corner and try not to cry. Then my coworker comes back after taking his brothers home, and he pulls me aside and says the classic line “I can’t give you what you want and I’m sorry for leading you on.” Like dude I never asked for anything from you 😭. I told him so many times in our previous conversations that a relationship is not what I need rn. Then we stood there for 20 mins while I was telling him that it was okay and that I’m not upset (I was miserable) I was just confused and humiliated. At work the next week it was kind of awkward, but not too bad, and then after a week or so, I reached out to him to talk about what happened that night. We were both drunk and I wanted to see where our heads were at - some closure so I can move on. I tried making this happen three times through three different modes of communication. (Phone, text, and I asked him in person too) We were really good friends and as friends I wanted to talk about it. He didn’t want to talk about it. He didn’t care one bit. He didn’t respond to my text. When I asked him in person to talk to find a time after work to talk about it he said he would and then never did. I was devastated. I’m not even getting basic respect from him right now. I didn’t talk to him for two weeks at work. Then I decided that got too exhausting and decided to keep conversation civil and at a minimum. Once I started doing that, now he tries to initiate conversation at work and acts like how he did before all this happened.
IM JUST SO CONFUSED 😭😭 can someone please help this is driving me nuts.

Hi, I am currently in A2F but also not involved in A2F. Reading about all these posts has made me realize how bad this church is, and I want to share my personal experiences. To stay anonymous, I will only say that I'm involved with one of the A2F churches in Southern California. Like many others here, I was approached by one of their members during the first year, specifically on first-year orientation. Since then, I have been meeting with that guy who approached me and called himself a mentor. Every week, we would read course 101, treat me to boba, and take me out to dinner from here and there. However, whenever we read, he would always question me on what I read and my thoughts, almost as if interrogating me to ensure I comprehended everything. Whenever we started reading the heavier passages, he would ask about my experiences and hit me with the "You don't have to share with me if you're not comfortable with it." Despite this, he would invite me to events even though I tell him that I go home (which is an hour away) every weekend. Although I told him I preferred to go home to visit my parents and the church I grew up with, he told me that I should stay for some weekends. Eventually, I would need to be independent of my parents. Not only that, I have always felt pressured as he would always invite me to their events or pressure me to invite some of my friends to their events, which I never did. He would even advise me with strategies to invite these non-church friends. I've also noticed a pattern that others have described in their universities. I see that all the "mentors," who are usually full-working graduates, stay within the area. I find it weird that most of them feel obligated to remain where they graduated. I also noticed that the pastor is from Berkeley, and my university is not in any of the locations mentioned here. Overall, this church and the people here give me bad vibes, and the people here just feel so pressing. It almost feels like I'm living in a simulation. For those who have experience leaving this org, I just want to ask how you guys did it because I'm really bad at rejecting people. Please!!!

Okay don't get me wrong I love Elsie. She's too young for me to think of as any more than a friend but she, like everyone else in town, is someone I want to protect and take care of. When she got back from her soul search thing, I was so proud of her and how much she grew as a character. Her story arc was incredibly satisfying.
But with that being said, there are still shit I'm kinda furious about that I need to get off my chest.

1. The investigation with her and Mi-an:

So suddenly she shows up in my house telling me not to worry about what Mi-an says in the letter and start going around town asking people sketchy questions about her sketchy bandit crush and show them the pictures too. Mi-an says we could get in trouble if we show the pictures. Kinda didn't know if I wanted to do it.
But okay whatever, I don't have a choice this is a main mission to progress the story. Let's do this.
I finish going around town asking everybody questions and finding out more lore that's nice. I meet up with Elsie and Mi-an at the Saloon and they ask me how I feel about it. I went for the nervous option and Elsie fucking bullies me about it. Gives me such a hard time because I wasn't chill about being the number 1 suspect for a break-in into the sexy man's house. Like okay I get that even if Justice found out, I'd probably be off the hook but I'm just saying I did all the work for you, Elsie. I know you're all riled up because you think he's innocent or something but you gotta stop being an ungrateful brat just because I wasn't cool about what I did for YOU.

1. I thought I could consider us best friends after that ordeal. When I talked to Elsie he keeps telling me I'm her best friend and it's so sweet. But after the investigation, once I stopped by the Blue Moon and saw Elsie and Mi-an hanging without me and I felt so left out. I was like... "Eff you guys, I'm hanging with the Corps boys 🥲 they'd invite me to things" and now the Civil Corps is my favorite social circle for my builder.
   
2. The Minster Whistle quest:
   

Okay I get that Elsie's kinda like the yin to Logan's yang. But like... does she really have to just stand there while we do all the work? Are you really going to risk the life of the guy who saved your life years ago because you don't think the monsters could be tamed instead? I also didn't see any taming in your part. you were just staring at us killing the vipers ffs. Like okay I guess?
I can build your whistles AND help out killing the vipers. I mean it's Logan. Duh I don't want him to die. But Elsie... COME ON. You decide you want to do this mission and here you are standing around while we're under attack for like 90% of the damn mission. I'm happy she started pulling her weight when the mega tunnel worm showed up but i still felt like Logan and I did most of the work. And I feel like if I said something that she didn't like she'd give me shit for it.

1. I was all for Logan getting a season in prison if that's what he wanted although the 200K+ fine was bit much. But knowing Elsie wanted it to be the lightest sentence possible made me feel like there was no other option. I mean it's fine I was gonna date him anyway but still.
   
2. Post-Daisy, she posts stuff on the bounty board and when I go to complete the order, she says she lives studying the critters and knows that I didn't rough'em up too hard... like GIRL, those vipers went poof when I was killed them... I'm so confused. You just wanted to study them but you put them on... a bounty board? THIS LADY.
   

Okay that is the end of my rant. I still love Elsie and want the best from her but theres just some things about her I needed to vent about. Thank for you for reading.