Let us start with the advert itself. Well, in form it is no different from the PiS adverts made by Kurski. Dramatic music, dramatic narration, dramatic frames, a few piles of skulls, a smiling Putin, Lukashenko and so on. It's obvious that the intention was to hammer the PiS = Russia equation into people's heads by appealing to the simplest of emotions, namely fear of a brutal superpower. Well, and it's a campaign ad, so of course the political opponent, i.e. PiS, is hit with a mace. Opinions differ. I am one of those who believe that this form will have the opposite effect to the one intended. In the safe electorate of PO it will probably be attractive. Everywhere else, it will cause embarrassment. As a result, many people will think that all this Russian influence is no real problem. Just another stage in the 20-year PO-PiS war. And I am not even talking about the so-called Jan Kowalski). This is exactly the tone in which professional pundits speak. It never ceases to amaze me, but what can I do, I have come to terms with the facts.
Well, it shouldn't be like that.
It has been argued that PiS has did a lot more and a lot worse over eight years. Yes, that is true. It has. And it would be nice if some pundits remembered that and didn't write silly things about how now, in May 2024, someone in Poland has called someone a traitor for the first time. Still, I guess we expected a more sophisticated rhetoric from the current government, didn't we? Because the problem of Russian influence is real and has been swept under the carpet as much as possible. And it needs to be dealt with in a calm, rational way.
That's right. Because apart from the form, there is also content in the ad. There is the statement that PiS "won the election with the help of illegally collected recordings from a Russian coal importer". Ok, here is the suggestion that PiS won ONLY because of this, which of course is not true. The 2015 victory, like any victory, was the result of many factors. Both the mistakes of the then PO-PSL coalition, the lies of PiS (Smolensk trutherism, refugee fearmongering, purported plans of privatising forests) and the poor result of the Left), which was missing a few tens of thousands of votes to enter the Sejm. Yes, this is manipulation, although we should also remember that we are talking about a 50-second election ad. Nevertheless, the base of this argument is as true as it can be. The recordings from the restaurant were commissioned by Marek Falenta, who imported Russian coal into Poland. The Russians were involved in this affair on several levels, to which I will return shortly. PiS obtained these recordings from Falenta, knowing that they had been obtained illegally and probably knowing that they were helping a Russian spy. PiS used them to help itself win the election. I'm sorry, but that's what happened.
It goes on to say that PiS increased imports of Russian coal. This is no secret either, the figures are public. In the last two years of the PO-PSL coalition, 6.5 and 4.9 million tonnes were imported from there. In the first years of the PiS government, these figures rose to 5.2, 8.6 and 13.1 million respectively, after which they began to fall. In 2019-2020, they reached a similar volume as in 2010-2011, i.e. with the PO-PSL government. Of course, this is manipulative, because to get a complete picture one would have to give the total volumes for eight years (and these are similar), while the sheer fact of the sudden increase in Russian coal imports after 2015 is undeniable.
It continued: 'Cases indicating the growing influence of Belarusian and Russian agencies have been swept under the carpet.
Excuse me, but weren't they? If it is possible to point to a constant, unchanging part of this issue during the eight years of the PiS government, it is the pattern, which has always been the same. Investigative journalists uncover some Russian influence on people close to the ruling party, some (let's be clear: some) media write about it, some of us are outraged, and then nothing happens. Little has been done about the Russian infiltration of circles opposing the government, see the Confederation, the anti-establisment and anti-vaccine movements and so on. The question 'where are the agencies' has even been asked so many times in pro-democratic social media that I could print these comments and cover my walls with them. Sorry, but that's how it was. I don't know if it gets any better, but that's the way it was.
Furthermore, 'they blocked investment in the expansion of the Polish army'.
If I were PO, I would stay away from this argument. Yes, PiS blocked the purchase of Caracal helicopters, and during Macierewicz's time as defense minister, the army sometimes even lacked uniforms. But all this is irrelevant today, given that after the Russian invasion of Ukraine the PiS government has expanded the Polish military a lot. This argument would make sense in 2019. In 2024 it does not. I note, however, that it was not as various PiS propagndists now portray it that they took power and immediately turned Poland into a military superpower. In fact, little was done in this direction for the first six years.
It continues: 'Thanks to the support and involvement of PiS politicians, Tomasz Szmydt, until recently a judge and in fact a spy who fled to Belarus, has made a dizzying career.
I don't know what could be controversial here? Probably just the clear naming of Szmydt as a spy. Actually, we don't know 100% what his role was, but ok, it fits into the convention of a campaign ad. On the other hand, the statement that Szmydt had a career on the side of PiS is, well, I'm very sorry, but: true.
Finally, there is a passage in which Tusk compares the United Right) to the communist ruling party PZPR, which was once deciphered as 'paid traitors, lackeys of Russia' (Płatni zdrajcy, pachołki Rosji) . It's all part of the political shit throwing. To make it stick, the PiS logo is turned upside down, and turns into the Russian coat of arms is. This is how the advert ends.
We have discussed the ad itself, but it has sparked a discussion about Russian influence in Poland. There is no shortage of voices saying that it is absurd to call PiS a 'pro-Russian party', because the PiS government has given a lot of military equipment to Ukraine, including priceless tanks, in considerable numbers. Let me perhaps clarify a few things.
It is necessary to specify what is meant by 'pro-Russian party'. Is PiS a party that openly says that Russia is great? No. Has Kaczyński ever said that he copied his policies from Russia? No. Has he openly sided with Russia against the West? Again, no.
But was Kaczyński saying much the same thing about the West that the Kremlin has been saying for years? Yes, he was. Did Kaczyński create a political crisis in relations with almost all of Poland's Western allies as soon as he took power? Yes, he did. Did he introduce a series of anti-democratic laws in Poland that resembled Russian solutions, albeit in a softer version? Yes. Did Kaczyński plan and promote a war with the EU institutions that ultimately led to an unprecedented freeze of EU subsidies to Poland? Yes. Did he speak the language of polexit? Yes, he did. Does all this fit into Russia's strategy of dismantling Western structures? Absolutely.
So perhaps a more appropriate word than 'pro-Russian' would be 'Russifying'? Or a little longer: 'often strongly pursuing the Kremlin's geopolitical interests, sharing the Kremlin's view of Europe and European values, as the Kremlin is fiercely anti-Western, though likely to see itself as very anti-Russian'?
Earlier I mentioned the tape scandal and the involvement of the Russians in it. Although it seems unlikely, some pundits have managed to dismiss this fact because it does not fit in with the fact that PiS supplied arms to Ukraine. Well, they say, if PiS is supposedly so pro-Russian that the Russians helped it come to power, how do you explain the aid? Well, first of all, its proponents forget something as trivial as chronology. When the people linked to the Russians were setting up the background to the tape scandal, there was no war. It was 2010-2012, and the first wiretap was set up in the spring of 2013. There was no Euromaidan, no rebellion in Donbas, no annexation of Crimea. No one could have predicted how PiS would behave in 2022, because no one expected anything unusual to happen in 2022.
On the other hand, it was foreseeable that PiS would be an anti-Western party. That it would be a party that would confront the EU and its individual members. That PiS would say similar things about the EU as Russia, as PiS had been saying for years, and that it would ally with far-right circles that said so even more. That it would make a mess in the intelligence agencies, just like in 2006. And now let's look at the chronology. In 2013, the first bugs were set up. In June 2014, a scandal erupts, the media repeats all these vulgar quotes for months, which kills off PO's chances in the 2015 elections. In the autumn of 2015, PiS takes power and almost immediately: breaks into the NATO counterintelligence expert centre, abolishes the ABW field delegations, removes almost everyone from the agencies and fills them with newcomers with no experience (just like in 2006), makes Macierewicz the head of the Ministry of Defence with all his Russian connections, which Macierewicz immediately turns into a landing spot for people with Russian connections (such as Gaj and Kownacki), supports the pro-Russian think tank Ordo Iuris and immediately initiates an anti-Western civilisational turn. In this context, should we be so surprised that the Russians might have preferred the PiS in power?
All this happens six years before any tanks are handed over to Ukraine. I know, shocker, history didn't start in the spring of 2022.
Well, and now PO is releasing that ad. And some people say: oh dear, now PiS is going to accuse PO of being pro-Russian and the PO is going to accuse PiS of being pro-Russian, It's unbearable, so let's pretend it's not happening. I won't hide it, it's tiresome. But it would be nice if, as a species, a rational species, we could sometimes look beyond the political insults and focus on the evidence. And there really is a lot of it. The fact that the advert presents the case in this way does not change the fact that the situation is extremely serious.
It has been argued that PO's ad is setting the European Parliament campaign entirely on the Russia-EU divide. This is true, but there is a nuance. Leaving aside the clumsy form and the manipulation I explained above... isn't it the case that it was PiS that just took part in no less than three summits of European and American eurosceptics, Trumpists and Putin lovers, where it was explicitly said that this is the election in which it would be decided whether Europe would return to 'normality', traditional values, Christian roots and a 'Europe of homelands', or be swallowed up forever by the woke behemoth? Needless to say, this is a narrative very similar to the one the Kremlin has been using for years?
In short, what we need now is a serious debate about Russian and Belarusian influence in Poland. A debate that has been sorely lacking in recent years. This debate will inevitably become part of a political conflict. It will not be avoided because we are also talking about the influence of top politicians (not only from the PiS, by the way). All the more reason to be careful. The PO ad is a campaign ad, so it has a different convention. Nevertheless, in my opinion, it does the opposite. It reduces a real problem to a political trend. We can only hope that this is just a stupid idea of a few PR excecs and not part of a strategy that will last for years. The recent actions of the ABW and the fact that Donald Tusk has announced the appointment of a commission of experts to investigate these influences allow for some cautious optimism on this issue. Time will tell, of course.

I’m torn. I was quoted $2800 to fix the catalytic converter on my 2006 4Runner the other day and I’m trying to stomach the price over possibly just selling altogether. It’s in good shape, no rust, 150,000 miles, haven’t modified it at all (yet). The trucks been in my family since it was brand new and I’ve been driving it for 15 years now. So the memories are priceless…driving through Utah, Arizona, Alaska, BC, California. Built a bed platform for it a couple years ago. I personally think the truck has at least another 150,000 miles if I keep up with maintenance, but 2800 is probably 1/5 of what the car is actually worth. I know the V8 4wd is still worth something even with the need for a new cat, but I eventually wanted to jack it up a couple inches, give her some big tires and make her all she can be. So I guess my question is what would you do? Sell and use that towards something newer or keep the 4th gen?

In memory of Leslie Shay
10 years ago, on May 13, 2014, Leslie Shay (played by Lauren German), the fan-favorite character of the NBC studio's series Chicago Fire, died in the finale of the second season. True, viewers only learned about this when the third season started. The death of the character was followed by an uproar from the audience, the popularity of the series (which had been on the rise until then) and the number of viewers decreased, because many people stopped watching the series due to Shay's death, including the author of this post (I reached the end of the third season). Due to the anniversary, I started researching on the Internet to better understand why Shay's character was destined for this fate, and using quite a few references and also abundant with spoilers, I will share with everyone what I came up with in this post. I will also write my own opinion.
(I apologize for any grammatical errors, I did not write the post in English and I created the English version with the help of Google Translate)
Shay's character probably doesn't need to be introduced to anyone, but if you do, this link nicely summarizes why everyone loved her so much.
https://screenrant.com/chicago-fire-leslie-shay-lauren-german-best-traits-facts-trivia/
When I started researching the topic, I read that despite the fact that Chicago Fire is already in its 13th season, Shay remains one of the most loved and most missed characters to this day. However, later, when I wrote the post, I could not find the source again, if anyone can send a link to this topic, please do so.
It is clear that if the series loses such a popular character, it will have an impact and will shake the viewers. Well, it turns out, more than anything in the show's 13 seasons. I found a lot of sources to prove this:
1)
People's Choice Awards, USA, 2015 / Favorite TV Character We Miss Most
In the above category, Shay made it to the top 5, which no one else did later.
https://www.imdb.com/event/ev0000530/2015/1?ref_=nmawd_ev_1
2)
Most shocking TV deaths of all time
https://tvline.com/lists/shocking-tv-deaths/leslie-shay-chicago-fire/
Shay is also included in the top 100 list above, as well as two other characters from the entire One Chicago franchise, Elias Koteas as Alvin Olinsky and Yuri Sardarov as Otis. Thus, Shay was on a list with the likes of Teri Bauer (24), Lance Sweets (Bones), Bobby Ewing (Dallas) or Ned Stark (GoT)
3)
And this is what ChatGPT answered when it was asked which of the characters in Chicago Fire had the most heartbreaking death (short quote from the answer):
"The most heartbreaking character death was definitely Leslie Shay. Oh, it was gut-wrenching! Shay, played by the incredibly talented Lauren German, was such a beloved and integral member of Firehouse 51....."
https://onechicagocenter.com/2023/07/24/heartbreaking-chicago-fire-death-according-ai-not-otisi/
4)
If I use the Google Search service, the answer to this search will also be Shay:
Question: "chicago fire most heartbreaking death"
Answer: "Leslie Shay died in a fire"
Searching the internet, it became clear to me that it wasn't just Shay's death that shocked viewers, but also the fact that the show's creators made the decision to get rid of Shay's character. This decision raised many questions and problems, which I will go through below. There are a lot of posts and articles on the internet about why Lauren German left the series, but in fact they were all based on a single, otherwise amazingly short interview that was made with Matt Olmstead. I found this at this link:
https://tvline.com/interviews/lauren-german-leaving-chicago-fire-shay-killed-off-549958/
If anyone has seen or read other interviews or other information, please share them.
I read a lot of comments under the link above, and I would like to thank everyone for expressing their opinions there. I read a lot of things in the comments that I didn't even think of at first, but it's good that they brought them to my attention, because I completely agreed with them.

1. The creators of the series killed off the third female character in 2 seasons, who was also one of the main characters.
2. Killing a character directly just for the sake of dramatic effect is already quite a boring solution
3. Olmstead praised Lauren German's talent a lot in the interview, but then why didn't the producers try to keep the actress?
4. Olmstead stated that there will be no flashbacks involving Shay. But in the first episode there were 4 (from Severide, Dawson and Boden)
5. The LGBT community also received a slap in the face, as an openly lesbian character was killed off. This is also a solution that has been seen many times and is boring.
6. Shay and Severide's relationship was one of the prominent aspects of the series, which made it worth watching, in fact, according to many, it was such a novel and well-constructed thread that the creators of the series were praised for this. After Shay's death, without the dynamism of their relationship, the series became boring.
7. Opinions also suggested that perhaps the goal was to attract the right target audience with Shay's lesbian character, but they no longer wanted to retain this group of viewers, so it was a harsh decision made from a business point of view by the creators
8. Olmstead defended the decision by saying that they could bring more and more storylines into the series, while without Shay's character, the exact opposite was true.
9. He also claimed that all the characters were assessed on equal footing when the decision was made. In comparison, they immediately replaced Shay with a new character who looked like her, was not a lesbian like Shay, and was 10 years younger. Because Lauren German was born in 1978, Kara Killmer in 1988. The message of this change was extremely bad in the eyes of the viewers
10. There was a commenter who suggested that the change was made so that the new character could be romantically involved with one of the male characters, and this actually happened during the third season when Brett and Cruz got together
11. If the purpose of Shay's death was to show how unpredictable life is, they should have paid much more attention to the details. The first part of the third season is full of mistakes and unrealistic solutions
12. It is strange that the interview only mentions in a few sentences what Lauren said to the fact that the creators of the series essentially fired her. In connection with this, it occurred to me that something else could have been behind the decision, which was never made public, but of course this is just a hunch.
13. As far as I know, Lauren German was the only main character in the history of Chicago Fire who did not leave the series by her own decision

There were many other strange things about Shay's death that could be found by searching the internet. I will also go through these in order.
A)
Let's return briefly to the fact that the popularity of the series decreased during the third season. This can be checked here
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chicago_(franchise))
Based on this, it can be definitely stated that whoever made this decision, for whatever reason, caused damage to the series.
The data:
First season, ranking 51, number of viewers 7.78M
Second season, ranking 31, number of viewers 9.70M
Third season, ranking 47, number of viewers 9.65M
The first season brought good numbers, and it can be seen from the data that its popularity increased for the next season. However, the ranking of the series dropped almost to the initial level by the third season, and although the number of viewers did not decrease so significantly, the reason for this is probably that, in addition to the viewers who left, there were still those who only joined at that time. Another interesting fact is that the third season is the only one where Dick Wolf is mentioned as showrunner. It is possible that during the third season he wanted to be more involved in the development of the story, and it was his decision to pull something unexpected in the series, so Shay's death is due to him. Here is a show-like interview with the whole team, in which I found it strange that Dick Wolf was given the central place on the stage.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M2tCrma7t5o&t=2s
It was as if they suggested that he was the most important person. It can be imagined that he always had the final say in making decisions. As a counter-example, I saw an interview with the actors of The Avengers, where one of the directors was present, and the Russo brother remained nicely in the background, since everyone was interested in the actors, Iron Man, and Thor, etc. However, this was not the case in this interview. Obviously, I'm not a behavioral researcher, so I can't draw important conclusions from a single interview.
Of course, it is also easy to imagine that the writing team made an independent decision, but did not count on how much the omission of Shay's character would turn fans away from the series. Thus, Dick Wolf was the savior when he was forced to intervene personally in shaping the story to mitigate the damage. Of course, it is also possible that these events and what I wrote about the video above have absolutely nothing to do with each other.
B)
It's also strange how many storylines with negative outcomes were connected to Shay's character during the first 2 seasons. She was seriously injured several times (the ambulance accident in the first season, the hospital bombing in the second season), and she went through several crises in her personal life. Her first love, Clarice, left her, and months later she broke Shay's heart a second time. Devon tricked and robbed her. When Severide and Shay wanted a baby, she failed to conceive. A patient of her, Daryl, whom she sympathized with, committed suicide in front of her eyes, and Shay also fell into depression after that, while her paramedic partner and friend, Dawson, did not care about Shay's mental breakdown at all. During the two seasons, she was almost hit by a car, almost shot, stabbed with a syringe, which could have been contagious, and there must have been other cases that I left out of the list. Then came the third season, where basically the firefighters who were inside a huge explosion were not hurt at all, while Shay, who was on the ground floor of the building, died in this explosion. On the part of the writers, this amount of negativism was perhaps already excessive and quite unrealistic (like the case of Doctor Romano in ER, who was hit by the helicopter). It's like the creators didn't really like the character, or didn't want to do anything with her other than build viewers' empathy / sympathy for Shay so they could switch it to a dramatic twist when the time was right. But that's the opposite of good storytelling in my view. My opinion is that the reason for Shay's popularity is not to be found in the "grateful" storylines written for her, because we will find it only and exclusively in the fantastic performance of Lauren German
C)
It's very strange that Leslie Shay was a main character in the first 2 seasons, but if you look at the Instagram page of the series (more specifically, the entire One Chicago franchise), you can see that Shay's character received very little attention.
https://www.instagram.com/nbconechicago/
At the time of writing this post, there were 3588 posts on the site. I took the trouble to check if my hunch was right and scrolled through to the posts about the first 3 seasons.
Number of pictures where Shay is clearly visible among many people in a group picture: 15
Number of photos where Shay is with 1-2 other people: 27
Number of photos featuring only Shay: 6
Yes, I didn't write a bad number, among 3588 pictures a total of 6 individual photos were given to one of the main characters of the first 2 seasons of the series, perhaps the most popular character of the series to date. Although Lauren German is a famously reclusive actress, she even has more selfies on her Instagram than that
D)
It's also very strange that in the third season they introduced a storyline that says Shay's death was caused by arson. Unfortunately, the execution of all this was extremely clumsy and illogical for me. It was already revealed during the first 2 seasons that Shay's parents are divorced, they live in two separate cities, and that she has no sisters. You could tell this from the fact that when Severide and Shay talked about who would take care of their baby if something happened to both of them, Dawson's name immediately came up. It's illogical that Shay wouldn't have said her sister. In fact, the whole thread felt more like a readjusting to placate fans who would channel their frustration and anger over Shay's death onto the arsonist in the story - instead of the show's writers.
E)
It occurred to me that maybe Lauren's relationship with her colleagues was not good, and for the sake of peace, the creators got rid of the character. This suggestion is probably the furthest from reality, I have a lot of hits that prove that Lauren maintained a very good relationship with her co-stars even later. Here are some examples of this
Trees R fun
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/-rn0w-CTv-0
Shayveride back together
https://twitter.com/TaylorKinneyARG/status/1128137229577216000
S03 E14
https://hu.pinterest.com/pin/2814818493493352/
https://hu.pinterest.com/pin/630785491553579592/
From Lauren's Insta
https://www.instagram.com/p/BlRQVXqgxqP/
https://www.instagram.com/p/BWZMBislmnE/
https://www.instagram.com/p/_50dHgFijd/
https://chicago.suntimes.com/2014/10/15/18477177/chicago-fire-if-anyone-can-saveseveride-it-s-casey
In real life, Kinney is grieving the loss of his costar, too.
"I miss her like crazy," he said about Lauren German. "She was a great scene partner. Great actor. Someone to work with and someone to confide in. It was an honest relationship. We hung out off the stages, too. I didn’t take that too easy.”
F)
It's also interesting that I've been able to find almost nothing online about what Lauren thought about what happened to Leslie Shay's character. What we do know from Matt Olmstead's interview is that she joked that she wasn’t going to miss the Chicago winters (she’s a California girl). Other than that, this is the only reaction from Lauren that can still be found, it's completely professional and polite, and perhaps it's no coincidence that she thanked the fans the most for their support
https://cartermatt.com/133627/chicago-fire-season-3-lauren-german-speaks-shay-premiere-shocke
"Hello beautiful people! I want to say thank you to NBC, Dick Wolf and the entire team for letting me be a part of such an amazing experience. I have to say I've never been around a more gifted, special, heartfelt, funny and loving cast and crew as with the CF gang. The show gave me so many priceless gifts. I'm forever grateful. I mostly want to thank the fans for their support and love on this journey. You all are so beautiful. It was a great honor to portray Shay. I love her: her spirit, her flaws, her honesty. And most of all she brought me the most genuine & meaningful interactions with you all, the fans, & my heart swells with gratitude. Thank you, thank you! So much love to you all.”
F) UPDATE
I just found this article, which for some reason didn't come up amongst the search results for the past few weeks.
https://chicago.suntimes.com/2016/1/22/18408021/chicago-fire-alum-lauren-german-having-devilishly-good-time-on-lucifer
In this article, Lauren told a sweet story that I believe happened during the filming of the pilot episode of Lucifer:
Given her time on “Chicago Fire,” guest starring on “Chicago P.D.” and now on “Lucifer,” has German changed the way she reads about or watches crime stories in the news?
“I think so, but mainly I think my experiences have made me have even more respect for first responders than I did before I went to Chicago. Sure, I always respected them and paid attention when I’d see a fire truck going by or hear about the cops getting the bad guy.
“But after the training we went through with the firemen and paramedics in Chicago — plus now having worked with homicide detectives to prepare for ‘Lucifer’ — I can’t tell you how much I respect these guys and women.”
German found herself the butt of a few jokes during the filming of a huge scene in Los Angeles near the Dolby Theatre — the site of the annual Oscars show.
“There were helicopters flying overhead, there was all this commotion, but we also had real firemen there. It wasn’t too long after I left ‘Chicago Fire,’ so they were yelling at me, ‘You went to the dark side!’ They were really kidding me about going from playing a paramedic to playing detective.
“Of course the cops on the scene were yelling just the opposite — telling me, ‘No! You’ve come to the bright side!’ I loved that, because that’s the fun friendly competition between the firemen and police officers. It’s kind of like Army vs. Navy.
“But of course, at the end of the day, everyone’s on the same team. These people are my heroes.”
In addition, she also talked about her previous work here, based on which it can be stated that the rumors that she wanted to quit are completely unfounded (I considered this suggestion so unfounded that I didn't even include it in my post). She also confirmed what was also discussed in point E).
German did admit she misses “the whole Chicago crew I worked with — and the wonderful fans in Chicago too. Everyone in your town is so great.”
The actress said she considers co-star Monica Raymund “my best girlfriend” and also keeps up with fellow “Chicago Fire” castmates Taylor Kinney and Jesse Spencer “quite a bit.”
“In fact just the other day, Monica asked me that after I wrap [the initial 13 episodes of] ‘Lucifer’ to come over [to Chicago] for a few days and hang out with those guys. So I may do that around the end of February.”
If so, it’s likely German and her “Chicago Fire” pals will make a beeline to the Palm restaurant on East Wacker Drive.
“Taylor and Jesse and I lived in the same building [on the New East Side], and we’d go to the Palm like three times a week. It was so cozy there. We even had our own regular little booth!”
End of update
In regards to the oddities above, I can even imagine that Lauren's agent or agents had a hard time agreeing on a possible contract extension, and because of this, the creators preferred to get rid of the character of Shay. If that was the case, we will never know. However, if the decision-making really took place in the way and according to the criteria as stated in the Matt Olmstead interview, then it can be seen in retrospect that this was an extremely bad decision by the studio and that the writing team made a huge mistake
I am slowly coming to the end of my research, but before that I would like to discuss the mistakes that the writers made in the first part of the third season - perhaps these mistakes could indicate that they were very hasty during the implementation, or that they did not think through at all how to put together such an episode well. When an average viewer saw this episode for the first time, the shock was guaranteed by it (believe me, it HITS HARD), in this way the creators achieved their goal, but it was enough later to think about what happened, and the shock was already replaced by completely legitimate indignation of the viewing public.
Regarding the mistakes, for the sake of fairness, I also have to say that I consider 4 things to be extremely outstanding from the first 2 seasons of the series:
1)
The visual implementation of the series was amazingly fantastic, as if you were watching a 45-minute movie, and it still stands today. I don't know if this changed after the third season, but I assume not, since the series is still active today
2)
Atli Örvarsson's music
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1ABsDFMJr2E&list=PLXT2pBWM8DxfN4znwe3esSqg4LtBzlQz8
3)
The actors Jesse Spencer, Taylor Kinney, Monica Raymund, Lauren German, Charlie Barnett, David Eigenberg, Eamonn Walker, Joe Minoso, Yuriy Sardarov, Christian Stolte were all fantastic in their roles
4)
The writers did something really brilliant when they built Severide and Shay's relationship. The way these two people moved mountains just out of love as a friend to help the other was simply wonderful. The relationship between the two of them was central to the show, which is why it was so painful and infuriating at the same time that the writers didn't think it was important enough to keep it going after 2 seasons. So I didn't consider the series important enough to continue watching after the third season either, or to start anything else from the One Chicago group.
Mistakes in S03 E01:
Devon's character:

• In the last 2 episodes of the second season, it was revealed that Devon might not be as a bad person as we thought. The writers hinted at the possibility that maybe Shay could finally find her happiness with her. Whether Devon had really changed, whether she was telling the truth, was never revealed after Shay's death.

Shay's death:

• Why didn't the paramedics wear helmets when they entered a potentially dangerous building? In other episodes, the characters paid attention to this, but here they generously forgot about it
• During the first flashback, we saw that they started to treat an injured person. When the explosion occurred and Shay was lying on the ground, the injured person was disappeared.
• The firefighter (played by Preston James Hillier) who ran into the building before the explosion also disappeared
• In the flashback, we saw that Dawson was thrown backwards by the shock wave of the explosion before the ceiling collapsed. Shay, on the other hand, sat still, unaffected by the shock wave
• The firefighting team was in the middle of the explosion, the only injury in comparison was a broken leg. Andy Darden died instantly in the Pilot episode, according to the script, when a house fire started in a similar way.
• Shay's CPR was interrupted to take her to the ambulance. At the same time, the one who could have taken care of her was Dawson, who was next to her, and Shay herself, maybe even Mills, who had a broken leg. So why was it important to take Shay to the ambulance, if not because it gave the scene a dramatic, albeit illogical, ending?
• Several people (e.g. Cruz, Otis) in the episode did not behave like those who recently lost a friend, and this could not be the fault of the actors, but rather of the script. The situation was similarly strange in the Pilot episode after Darden's death
• Shay said that she has a good relationship with her parents, so it's very strange that they didn't apply for Shay's things, but Casey and Severide collected them a month and a half after Shay's death. Not to mention the later invented sister
• When Severide looked at a photo of Shay before playing the video, it can be seen that the creators did not bother to take a real photo, but instead used a screenshot from the first season.
• It's quite unlikely that Dawson would pick up a diary a month and a half later that still had Shay's signature on it, and the signatures were completely different

Again, in the interest of fairness, Severide's flashbacks, Severide and Shay's video were flawless. Just like the gesture of putting Shay's name on the ambulance door in the middle of the season was a great idea from the writers
Final thoughts:
This is how far I've come in my research. Unfortunately, I didn't find any reassuring answers, only strange things. If there was something else in the background why Shay's character had to die, it will probably never be revealed. If the whole truth was told in the Matt Olmstead interview, then in my opinion the creators of Chicago Fire made the biggest mistake of their lives by firing Lauren and letting the Shayveride friendship vanish. Plus, Leslie Shay's character didn't deserve such fate. Anyway, the first 2 seasons were a fantastic experience for me.
Although Lauren couldn't have known it at the time, she was doing very well, because after being unemployed, she auditioned for the role of Chloe Decker in the series Lucifer. Here she joined the team that involved Tom Ellis, Kevin Alejandro, D.B. Woodside, Lesley-Ann Brandt, Rachael Harris, Scarlett Estevez, and later Aimee Garcia, Tricia Helfer, Tom Welling, Inbar Lavi, Rebecca De Mornay, Dennis Haysbert and Brianna Hildebrand. The rest, as they say, is history. Lucifer was the biggest series of 2021 by racking a whopping 18.3 billion minutes of streaming across the year making the series the most-streamed show not just on Netflix, but among the entire crop of streaming originals. Lucifer was voted the best fantasy series of 2021 also, and Lauren German became very, very worldwide-famous.
https://netflixlife.com/2022/01/26/lucifer-best-netflix-show-2021/
After Lucifer ended, Lauren retired from acting, making her last appearance in November 2023 at an event in Chicago, the Heaven and Hell Convention. Here, of course, she was hilarious again, or to put it stylistically, funny as hell, and she simply proved why she was the actress who played Leslie Shay back then
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=um_hcX4FkfM
https://www.instagram.com/p/CzHxlcMqM3
Here are a few links at the end
My favorite fan video commemorating the Shayveride friendship
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rjS1LmJgCIo
Others have written their opinions before me on the Leslie Shay topic, e.g. a great post
https://www.thetvaddict.com/2014/09/29/did-chicago-fire-kill-off-the-wrong-characte
A little fun
https://www.tiktok.com/@chicagofires/video/7255400196711107886
Still a little fun
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7vZOsrSHql0
Thank you for reading through!
PJ
(this post is free to use and redistribute, but please at least credit the source! Thanks)
Do You remember Leslie Shay?
View Poll

Only in Canada can a group of Indians who came to Canada to game the system to gain PR and citizenship so they can get our social services and the benefits of our passport throw a tantrum that the government of the province they live in realized they need to prioritize their citizens over the scammers.
Here’s what’s happening in PEI for everyone who doesn’t know. PEI just like the rest of Canada now needs the post world war 2 effort of home building to address the insane demand the government brought in from around the world. Not only is the insane massive population growth impacting rental prices in PEI pricing out locals. The amount of young adults 20-34 living with their parents because their priced out of home rentals has increased by 5%. It sounds small until you realize it’s 14,025 people. They’re losing massive amounts of farmland. Between 2016 and 2021 PEI has lost 16 hectares of farmland a day. This is quoted directly from the CBC. We’re destroying our farmland and the lives of our young people to appease the interest of foreigners and business owners.
https://ca.news.yahoo.com/why-p-e-needs-war-174917651.html
https://www.cbc.ca/amp/1.6931811
As a result of recognizing this lunacy, that they don’t have enough hospitals, housing for the Canadian citizens of PEI what does the government of PEI do? They rightfully acknowledge they have too many non permanent immigrants and decide to prioritize the people we were told the government is bringing in millions of people for. Healthcare and construction. Now Indian non permanents are protesting because the gig is up. Their work permits in fast food and retail will hopefully expire soon making them illegals. They want PR. Here is a direct quote from the CBC’s ill written sob piece for these scammers.
"We only get once-a-lifetime chance… We came to P.E.I. because they made these rules that we can apply for PR after six months, one year," he said. "But they changed it overnight."
Source: https://www.cbc.ca/amp/1.7200685
These are foreigners protesting on social media and in person to get our governments to prioritize them essentially over their citizens and constituents. That’s the social media page they’ve created. It’s absolutely disgusting. We do not as a nation owe Indians anything. They are Indians. India can take care of their people. We do not owe them PR, citizenship, healthcare nothing. If they were scammed by schools the owners of those schools should be held to account but they should still go back to India. We have a housing crisis here, we’ve never seen before.
https://www.instagram.com/protest_pei_2024?igsh=Mmttbzdrd2VjcXg1
For anyone who wants to see what the reciprocal is. A German masters student studying in India decided to attend a protest in India where the government was discriminating against giving citizenship to people based on religion. I as a westerner think that’s a fair thing to call out. They suspended his visa immediately and kicked him out. These people are not only destroying the social fabric of our country. They are demanding our government neglect its own citizens to enact policies these foreigners want. It’s insanity.
https://www.euronews.com/2019/12/24/german-student-kicked-out-of-india-after-joining-anti-modi-protests
It’s very simple if you can’t get licensed in Canada as a healthcare worker. Doctor or nurse. Goodbye. No visa renewal go be the best food service specialist in your home country. Their children born here should also not get citizenship if they’re not Canadian. We don’t need anchor babies. No boomer from anywhere on earth Ukraine, Malaysia, USA, India, Russia should ever get our citizenship. They should only be allowed as guests with health insurance, unless they’re coming with billions or trillions. For everything else there’s Mastercard. If you don’t have health insurance and you’re a foreigner you should be denied entry into Canada.

(in limita a 50 de lei) prin programul Martea Mastercard.
Am verificat si merge.
Promotiile de la Mastercard sunt cam singurul motiv pentru care mi-am facut cont pe Salt pentru ca la restul bancilor ce au cost de intretinere 0, cam toate cardurile sunt Visa.
Atentie: Site-ul priceless.com este site oficial Mastercard, aveti grija pe unde va bagati datele cardurilor, verificati de 5 ori inainte.
Daca nu aveti cont pe Salt Bank si vreti sa va faceti in urma acestei postari, puteti folosi codul meu de referral: 46PYU5.

Before everyone jumps on my case, I'm going to say I don't mean that I like Fiona as a person, I don't know her and can't make that call, but I will say that I very much like what she said towards the end. I can't remember word for word, so to paraphrase it was something like:
I can't change your minds, all I can do is rebuttle. Watch the interviews with Richard and Jessica, and make up your own minds.
Make up your own minds.
Not what I think, not what Reddit thinks, not what your partner thinks, not your coworker or your neighbor's brother's, friend's, cousin who also watched the show think. And no, not even what does Richard Gadd think.
What do YOU think happened?
In this day and age, with targeted ads and algorithms, predatory advertising, and media. Cultural and societal programming beginning before we can even tie our own shoes - Free, independent thought is priceless and beautiful.
I personally believe that the truth is somewhere in between what we all believed watching the show and believe now in light of the interview with Piers and the numerous interviews with Gadd.
I watched it believing there were truths and that there were dramatizations for the sake of telling a good story, and even for the sake of getting a particular message across. As with any "true" story we've seen so far come out of the entertainment industry.
I also believe that Richard is a brilliant writer who showed the world something important. No denying that, and nothing can diminish it. I believe he struggled with his own mental health issues and met others who struggled. I believe he was both a victim and a bit of a victimizer. That victimization is nuanced as is depicted in the show and was a huge part, if not the whole point of him having told this story in the way that he did.
I also believe that for whatever reason, be it malicioussness (doubtful), carelessness, short-sightedness, (whatever) - I don't and can't know his reasons, but for whatever reasons I think we need to admit that he did not take care to conceal the identity of the woman the story is based upon, and therein does lie some issue. Who knows? Maybe in his mind, her identity was concealed efficiently. I tend to think he didn't believe the show would take off like it did and that she wouldn't be found. The possibilities don't really matter.
And I'm absolutely not saying that people have an obligation to protect their abusers. So please don't get it twisted. What I am saying is there has to be some level of responsibility, and if Gadd believes her too ill for jail, why would she be well enough for half the world to know her name and face? It's not my question to answer. I say this only with a bit of curiosity, but i don't see how any good can come of Fiona's notoriety.
Even simply changing the format at the beginning of the program to based on a true story versus this is a true story that would have changed so very much.
At the end of the day there are still no heroes or villains in any of this (except maybe Darrien, who maddeningly remains elusive, unaccounted for and unaccountable), and I'm glad for it, because as much as human nature wants there to be neat black and white categories, that's not what makes up life.
So much of life is currently being ruined by trying to put all this chaos and mess that is being human into a box. Baby Reindeer is compelling in its ability to paint its characters with a broader brush than seen before. There is no neat box tied with a neat symmetrical bow to put Richard's characters in. It gives its audience the credit to think independently.
If we learn nothing else, please let it be this. I urge you, think for yourself. Stop trying to make life neat and orderly. It's damaging and impossible. Take what the show meant to you, and run with it. Let your heart and mind be open to the nuances and the mess that we all share. Let your humanity shine through. Or as a quote I love says: "Embrace The Glorious Mess That You Are."
Thank you.

I've saved up and not spent my Income Tax refund, the GST Rebates, Carbon tax rebates.
Almost $1000 saved up.
I have a PC Financial Mastercard sittting at $900 balance (yes the interest is like 21%)
My 2006 car needs new shocks and struts. Cost quoted is $900. I will own this car until it dies, but the safety factor with the shocks and struts is paramount to me.
So...
1) use my savings to pay off the Credit Card and close it. Start again saving up to fix my car. Yes I would work overtime at work to do this.
2) use my savings to pay off the credit card, and then use the Credit Card (now $zero) to fix my car.
3) Pay $100 a month to the credit card, and use my savings RIGHT NOW CASH to fix my car.
The answer is probably obvious. I am leaning toward #2?? Except if I pay off the credit card they might lower my limit so I can't use the credit on car repairs.
I appreciate your help.

How common is it for Mastercard to reopen the priceless experience for the nyc marathon? I saw there’s a waitlist but wasn’t sure if they ever have reopened in the past. Thanks for the help!

For some context, me and my friend don't have much time together during the day. We have been having a falling out recently, as I have started to notice her toxic attention seeking behavior. She has recently been faking mental health issues such as depression. Here's a quote: "I just do self harm, that's my fix!" As well as talking shit about our other friends. Me and her both have a study hall period at the same time, just in different classrooms. We will usually meet and talk over Google Docs and use the comment system to communicate. Recently, she noticed I have been distancing myself from her. I spoke to the counselors, and she gave me advice. We don't have much time left in the year, and she told me some ideas. I chose to just tough it out, but she confronted me over docs. Here's a summary. "What is up with you? Why do you hate me?" "You are attention seeking." "How?" "You fake mental illness and trash talk friends." "(Ignoring what I said.) So this is it?" "Yeah." "You're just going to throw 3 years of friendship into the trash?" "Yeah." "What can I do to fix this. Name your price!" "300 bucks take it or leave it." "Not actual money!" "300 bucks, take it or leave it." "So you only care about money huh?" "No. but I'll only stick around if you slide me 300." "I thought our friendship was priceless!" "Nah. you put a price on it as soon as you started acting shitty." "Maybe I don't need you! You are horrible!" "girly pop u sl** shamed our friend you can't be talking." After that, I talked to another girl in our FG who told me doing it over Google Docs was cruel. To be fair, the only time i get to talk in person with her is when the rest of the FG is around. She also doesn't have a phone, so I can't call or text her. She's also telling me that the "300 bucks take it or leave it" Was cruel and unnecessary. AITA?

First off, let's get the formalities out of the way.

What is this?

This is a note to and about the online trans voice community (mostly restricted to this subreddit and a couple big Discord communities), and in it, I'll be laying out all of my frustrations with this sub and those Discord servers over the like, 1.5 years that I've spent somewhat involved with them. I have a lot to talk about.

Why are you making this?

Because I've seriously become tired of how draining these places often are. There's a reason my post history has such an unexpectedly wide gap; it's that I discovered how unhealthy being here actually is. It's so unhealthy that I might delete this account after I figure out a solution for keeping the Selene clip collection alive. This is also a great segue into the next question:

Who the hell do you think you are?

I am u/Cosmic_Marmalade, a sort-of known volunteer on here and on Discord. I've made the Selene archive and the L's Guide critique and have just generally dedicated a serious amount of time to helping out folks (and learning myself) since late 2022. It's not much compared to some other recognizable characters on here, but I believe I've been in these spaces for long enough that I can say something of tangible value. Anyway.
Once again, I want to remind you that this won't exactly be a perfectly-summarized bullet list. I'm gonna ramble and there's gonna be a lot of words, so expect exactly that.
I'm gonna be using they/them to refer to myself here just because I want to. I'm letting you know this because I've consistently been "a she", so to speak, before this post. Don't think too much about it.

1. Just a little bit of lore about me while we're here

I first got into trans voice when I was 14 (two years ago; I'm 16 at the moment, how shocking) through Lsomethingsomething's infamous guide to voice feminization. I didn't really get anywhere using it so I started looking around for other methods and stuff online, and eventually decided I'll become active in the online communities to hopefully get a little bit of that learning-by-(supervised)-teaching going. From there, I started doing the whole helping-people-and-linking-to-resources thing, talked to and consumed the material of people more educated than I am, and eventually started kind of knowing what I was doing to a certain degree. I wasn't arrogant by any means, but I was a little more confident in myself. I got better at explaining stuff and made that clip post that I'm still quite proud of.
One thing I never told anybody before is the reason I spent so much time still learning and still helping: I wasn't actually satisfied with my voice just yet. It's quite the systemic problem really; most people who figure out the secret sauce have no reason to remain here, especially when they get nothing (or even less) in return. The thing I like blaming for my lack of vocal prowess is the fact that I live in... imperfect conditions for a transgender person practicing their voice. I can't exactly have a VFE routine since those get quite loud, nor can I start habitualizing my voice effectively (since that would require both never leaving my room and only speaking at a restrictively low volume in there to avoid suspicion). Things like yelling and overfullness have also been quite troublesome for similar reasons. Is this really the only reason I haven't gotten anywhere after flying way past the expected time-for-satisfaction for voice? I don't know. Maybe? I just want you to hold your "Oh I bet they've got some inherent FLAW in their throat that makes it UTTERLY IMPOSSIBLE for them to EVER make a pleasant female-coded sound" horses for the time being. One can't draw valid conclusions from an experiment with so many non-standardized variables like this one, okay?
Anyway, yes, that's my deathly secret. Oh yeah, here's one more directed to Sumi the voice teacher: So, remember that time I made you like, completely reinvent a new term for "compression" because you thought the reason I strained during speech was because I was going off my own intuition regarding what the term means? Well, I wasn't actually doing that. I was actually already vocalizing in a horribly strained manner before and just happened to attempt your idea of compression (directly from the wiki) to that faulty template. Whoopsies!
Now that that's done, let's get to the offensive parts of this essay.

2. The deeply alienating uwu transbian culture

Here's a characteristic of these communities that's probably great if you're one specific flavor of person but utterly dreadful if you're anything else. I really wouldn't mind this as much if the thigh-high-wearing boymoders were just a small portion of the crowd, but it really feels like everybody around me is a gamer catgirl even though that's obviously not true. With all due respect, my dear 4chan-browsing nyaa smol beans, you really... claim the space, let's say. You're just a lot louder than everyone else and I feel like it makes those of us who aren't inclined to skirt-go-spinny-on-the-blahaj feel really isolated.
I also want to note that this isn't exactly just a problem with trans voice spaces in particular; most mainstream online trans spaces (especially those featuring younger people) also suffer from this severe pressure to act like the ideal cute-girl transfem you see on traa and egg_irl and such. It's to be expected, really, but it still upsets me that it's so hard to find people with a similar personality and/or self-expression to mine. If you feel as lonely in these communities as I do, I sincerely wish you the goddamn best in the world and want to let you know that I get it. I really do. I'm not about to tell you it's society or internalized transphobia or whatever, I'm just here to tell you that I truly understand how you feel.
There's also not enough trans men and generally masculine-presenting individuals 'round these parts, which again makes sense considering how unwelcoming big online spaces are to them and the seemingly lower demand for voice masculinization, but I still wish there was more of them.
So, to conclude my thoughts on this matter: It's alienation. I don't fit in with the "gib pats :3" folks and it just so happens that they are the dominant demographic in both these spaces and online trans spaces as a whole. Kind of unsolvable really but I might as well put it here in this totally-unnecessary farewell note. Try to stop me, I dare you.

3. Misinformation and the ungrateful bastards (tone shift much?)

Volunteering out of the goodness of your heart to help people unfortunately doesn't result in heartfelt "thank you"s and smiley face emojis. On some occasions, you get annoying entitled brats who think they have any semblance of a right to disrespect the ones providing them with this free-of-charge service. People just blazing with anger and throwing it at you as you try to explain to them that no, this 4chan sissification voice guide they found online IS awful and WILL be less effective at getting you the results you want. Now, obviously these people are severely mentally troubled for all sorts of reasons and the stress of voice training (which is its own topic) doesn't help, but there comes a point where this lack of discipline is just too much. You don't even KNOW how often I've seen people treat Selene (well-known teacher) with zero goddamn respect as if she's doing anything but helping them at the cost of her precious time. Something a lot of you (obviously might not be you specifically but also it MIGHT be you specifically) gotta understand is that you don't actually deserve our help and our time. I think I'll refrain from naming people here, but us volunteers are doing this and getting very little in return. Some people think we're part of a conspiracy to brainwash the masses and that we're all evil dumb idiots lying to get you to buy lessons from the teachers we've been employed by. That's not the case! We're just normal (well...) people wasting our priceless time on people who clearly aren't worthy of it!
Let me be clear here: This is what I (in bold) think. I don't want to see you harassing my fellow unpaid coworkers because I said some things you don't like. They absolutely have different philosophies than mine. I don't like you, but maybe they do, so show them the appreciation they deserve (and yes, they do deserve it cause they actually did something). If you just wanna scratch that harassment itch, I'm right here. Send me alllll the hate you've got.
The other thing this section shall be dedicated to is the pitiful state of information and methodology on here despite all of our best efforts. As an example, scroll through the front page on transvoice real quick and stop when you see a Voice Tools screenshot or video. Chances are that all it took was a few seconds to come across one of those. I tried it and I'm pretty sure it took me under half a minute on the crappy new big-man Reddit UI. Take a shot every time you see some poor soul obsessing over muscles and the larynx and the nebulous "resonance" (which never means the same thing no matter who you ask). It's all just a mess and that is made even worse by the existence of the snake oil proponents who resist the size/weight model on the grounds of "uhhh ummmm everybody learns differently" as they explain how you need to look at your throat in the mirror and trial-and-error your way into contracting the appropriate muscles. Ughhhhh. You know, I was around for that whole thing. I don't know if they still swear by this oropharyngeal-closure stuff in Scinguistics these days, but oh man people loved that gif of the lady terraforming her throat and uvula and would look you in the eyes and say "do something like this for OPC". Long-time residents of this subreddit remember that one user who would show up every once in a while to preach the gospel of Swallow-and-Hold 2 and have multiple heated debates with Cathy. God that lady was exhausting. You still sometimes get people saying Big Dog/Small Dog saved them or whatever, but hey, at least it's not the gosh-darn swallow exercise.
Honestly, I don't really care anymore about this neverending debate of which methods are better. All I'm gonna say is that Z (who explains stuff really vaguely now for some reason?), Selene, and Clover have the tools that are to me, the most sensible out there. I just don't respect those "mimicry doesn't work" randos, man, like how the heck did you learn the English language we're communicating in right now? How did you learn that horrible mock British accent you keep using for laughs? Through mimicry, that's how! You weren't thinking about your aryepiglottic sphincter and your thyroarytenoid muscles when you were screaming and crying as a small child because you had to go to school! Fortunately, I'm not interested in actually debating this with anybody, so feel free to completely ignore the cognitive dissonance bubbling up in your head right now if that's what brings you joy. I don't care (that much).

4. IS IT OVER FOR ME???? AM I ETERNALLY DOOMED TO BEING ASS AT VOCALISTICS????

This acts as a sort of follow-up to the previous section because we're still looking at the numerous troubles of volunteering. This time, it's the hopeless, depressed, extremely not-okay voice trainees who are unintentionally making things worse for everybody.
So, I often see people going like "voice training sucks and is super stressful" and such, and like, I understand what you're talking about, but also please, for the love of all that is golden, consider the fact that you're not just screaming into a vacuum when you say something like that. Maybe someone was already having a bad day with practice, and when they saw that, they got even more pissed off than they already were because what are these posts saying but "I should abandon all hope of ever being happy with myself; success is impossible and to give up is to be honest". It's just a really crappy vibe to spread and just makes everybody sadder. What's also just wonderful is when people expect you to be their unlicensed (and unpaid) therapist and also simultaneously blow up at you whenever you attempt to comfort them. It's a great time! I love it when stuff like that happens! I love it when people make things all about themselves and have no sympathy for their elders! I know I'm younger than every single one of you (except for you, Luna, I see you) but I'm really playing the role of the elder here when I have to help this mentally unstable child not explode. I didn't sign up for any of this shit when I decided I wanted to help people explore size and weight, man.
The fact that there's so many of these please-get-therapy-for-the-love-of-god children (they sometimes are literal minors but that's irrelevant) really ensured that I'll never work as a voice teacher ever. Can you imagine sitting with someone like that except you can't just leave the Discord channel???? AND THEN PEOPLE TREAT TEACHERS LIKE WEALTHY CAPITALIST ELITES! Shit makes no goddamn sense! You wouldn't last a second in the arena with a mentally ill college student!
However, the true horror appears when these people channel their trauma into rhetoric. All of a sudden, you get the only thing worse than comforting a sad stranger who hates you: debating a sad stranger who hates you. I welcome thee to the shittiest pits of trans voice discourse: The "should I just give up and die" war.
On one side, we're gonna gonna have team C (completely arbitrary letter choice by the way), which is the crowd that lives by the slogan "not everybody can succeed at voice training" and really wants to convince everybody of that. Then, we have what I like to call "the other andies", which are the resistive force battling the formidable team C in the marketplace of ideas and cat ear headphones. Team C and the Other Andies are a tale as old as time, one that is as eternal as the breeze of twilight. Let's look a little further into it.
Team C consists of people who are disillusioned with the messages they're given by popular voice teachers, naive students, and kids' shows: that you just gotta work hard enough and all your dreams will come true. They've arrived at a solid brick wall in their harrowing quest for a biologically female (or male) voice and they don't believe they have the zuzz it takes to get past this obstacle. Are they right? Hell if I know! It's really hard to properly get a picture of this demographic because I bet a lot of it is people who are simply in a horrible headspace and just need to try harder when they feel better, but I'm sure there's individuals in there with actual muscle problems and hearing/speech trouble and all sorts of other issues I can't shrug off in good faith. Furthermore, they kind of DO make a good argument when you take this little clip into consideration. Now I'm not one to jump to conclusions necessarily, but I think the contradiction between what Z says here what she tells to the public speaks to a wider problem among many of the Other Andies, which is that they often overpromise just to make you feel a little better about yourself (or to make you buy their stuff, I guess? Sometimes, maybe? I'm not a conspiracist).
Something special about the Other Andies is that they're not as much of a monolith as team C, which tends to say more-or-less the same stuff (you know the drill: some people can't do it, stop lying to us you scumbag pigs, etcetera). Some other andies say delusional shite like "99.99% of people succeed", while others carry the much more honest and respectable "you're probably gonna be okay". I like the latter subsection, the other other andies if you will. They're not riding the toxic positivity train, but they're also not shooting corrosive substances at your face, yknow? I still think this is a stupid fucking debate. You wanna train? Then do it. Can't do it? Then either you try harder or you make peace with what you've got. I'm not saying this from a position of privilege because my ass is MUCH closer to the vocal ability of a team C member.
This goes out to all my team C friends, possibly including the mysterious grand general of the movement if such an entity even exists. I'm... worried about you. It's really not healthy to spend so much of your life on a place you hate, talking about a topic you hate with people you hate, perceiving yourself as the only soldier standing between the small Voice City and the monstrous hurricane of false hope... Please let your trauma heal and move on from this place. I'm trying to do the same too, just work towards it. I understand and respect that you still find some purpose in helping others find their footing in this cold, dark world, but I think it's time you extend that courtesy to yourself. You're so much more than this and you deserve so much more happiness in this weird world. Allow yourself to start a new chapter with all of this headache- and heartache-inducing garbage behind.
You have it in you to make it out of this dumpster fire and finally live a more fulfilling existence. Is it gonna be hard? 100%, but we're gonna do it together, even if I don't even know who you are in the slightest. It's all about that little idea. That flame of ambition, to quote the Fell Omen. Keep the desire for a better life alive within you, and I wish you the motherfucking greatest quantity of luck.

6. The future of the Selene clip collection

The reason I didn't make this post earlier was because I was worried about what would happen to my dear resource collection if nobody was around to maintain it (since this account is almost certainly hitting the dectus at this point), but I've decided I'll delegate this task to a fellow volunteer. I haven't properly decided on how exactly this shall happen, but rest assured that your Selene clip supply may never run dry, my lovely friends that I absolutely did not insult the fuck out of for the past three thousand words.
That is all I have to say! May we never meet again. Was lovely, but I'm fucking TIRED, man.
[EDIT 10/05/2024: For the record, I am very very thankful for the nice responses here and a heart emoji goes out to you folks <3. I'm not really too informed about the whole language acquisition counterpoint thing that user brought up, but I respect them and what they're saying.]
[The Selene Clip Collection has been updated with a new announcement. Once the GitHub organization becomes large enough, I'll finally be able to enter the florpus.]

Full disclosure - I used to agree with this sentiment when I was younger. I loved animals and I hated seeing them suffer, and when you're upset about something you have no control over, pointing fingers to the owners responsible seemed to be my first reaction. Why is passing negative judgement on small snippets of information so much easier than empathizing? When I started practicing empathy, I realized it took the same amount of energy and instead of leaving with negative feelings, I left feeling that I learned something new after connecting with other pet owners.
When I got into Access to Care veterinary medicine, we met all kinds of pet owners who couldn't afford top quality veterinary care. As a part of providing free and affordable veterinary care to the community, we got to learn them and their stories and their names (changed).
- Jon, a farm worker who lived and worked on his employer's property. Whatever money he made, he sent home to his family. He found a stray dog on the property that was malnourished. No one claimed her during the time, and eventually he bonded with this dog, feeding her his food scraps and cheap dog food from Tractor Supply. "I never thought she would come into my life and change everything. When I decided to move far away from home to work there were times I felt so alone and homesick. She is now my home - my everything."
- Rochelle, a single mother who escaped an abusive past, working 2 jobs while caring for her 10 year old son, who had a mental disability. A neighbor's cat had kittens and her son would go over to the neighbor's house to see and pet the kittens, eventually bonding with one. She was reluctant to adopt the kitten due to their situation, but decided to give pet ownership a chance due to the immense bond her son showed with the kitten. "I've never seen him like this before - he was always socially challenged and I worried a lot about him sometimes. But his kitten is is best buddy, they sleep together, eat together. The cost of pet care does give me anxiety, but the value of their bond is priceless."
It's easy to say "you don't deserve a pet" online because we don't have the opportunity to actually understand that pet owner. We don't get a chance to know them or their story - but what we know is that they love their pet and they need help. Not every pet owner will afford the the most expensive high quality of care that maximizes the potential to treat disease or provide their pet with the highest quality of care at home, but we can try as best as we can with what we have. We can practice empathy while giving sound advice and support to pet owners to make informed decisions. I'd argue it costs less energy to practice empathy than to pass negative judgement and berate a stranger online.
A quote from Emily Maroutian helped me as a veterinary professional for myself and pet owners: “You did the best you could with the knowledge you had in that moment. It’s easier to look back at an event and see a better choice or pathway because we already learned from our experience. Hindsight happens after the lesson, so we can’t condemn ourselves for not knowing the lesson before we learned it.”
Pet ownership and the wonderful experience of the human-animal bond shouldn't be restricted for the privileged class. One can do everything right as a pet owner and still have to face difficult decisions at some point in their journey.
I leave you with Stephen Covey's words "Seek first to understand, then to be understood."

Hello, rolex
I simply need to let everything out since I'm experiencing a range of feelings. My family recently gave me a Rolex 16013, and although it's a lovely watch with emotional significance, I'm now experiencing more tension than happiness from it.
The watch just does not function at all. I've had many quotes for repairs from different businesses, and the lowest one I got was about $800. Sadly, that is much above my means. To put things in perspective, without the original box and paperwork, I could only expect to sell it for between $1000 and $3000.
I'm much more frustrated since I have no idea what the issue is. It like a ticking time bomb of possible costs. After having it appraised, the replacement value was calculated to be at least $12,700.
I understand that it could seem like I'm whining, but things are difficult. Every time I look at this watch, which is the only thing I inherited from my family, I am left feeling torn. It's a priceless remembrance, but it also serves as a continual reminder of the pressure and unpredictability of finances.
I suppose I just had something to say about this. Has anyone ever had a comparable circumstance involving an inherited watch or any other precious item? How did you handle it? Right now, any guidance or words of wisdom would be highly welcomed.
I appreciate you listening.