Welcome to all GMs and AGMs to this year's edition of the /hockey annual offseason sim!

Spreadsheets

I will be personally editing all the spreadsheets, keeping them updated throughout the sim and they can all be found on the sidebar and the chat channel.

• [Rosters]()
  
• [General]() (Draft, RFA/UFA Lists, Trades, Depth Charts)
  

Please message sandman730 if anything is incorrect or if you wish to change your roster sheet.

Tentative Sim Schedule

• Mon. June 10th - Sim Discord Invites
• Thu. June 13th - Sim Begins and Rosters Frozen (2pm ET)
• Sun. June 16th - Deadline for GMs to Submit Plans (2pm ET)
• Mon. June 17th - Trade Period Begins (2pm ET) (Provided GMs have an Approved Plan)
• Mon. June 17th - Buyout Period Begins (2pm ET)
• Thu. June 20th - Deadline to Submit Trades Involving Players/Prospects and 2024 NHL Draft Picks (8pm ET)
• Fri. June 21st - NHL Draft Rounds 1-3 (8pm ET)
• Sat. June 22nd - NHL Draft Rounds 4-7 (2pm ET) (No Trades Allowed)
• Sat. June 22nd - Last Chance to Place Players on Waivers for a Buyout (2pm ET)
• Sun. June 23rd - Deadline for Qualifying Offers (5pm ET)
• Sun. June 23rd - Buyout Period Ends (5pm ET)
• Sun. June 23rd - Last Chance for Clubs to Sign UFAs to an 8 Year SPC (11:59pm ET)
• Mon. June 24th - Free Agency Roster Freeze (12pm ET) (Discussion allowed, but no moves finalized)
• Thu. June 27th - Free Agency Begins (12pm ET)
• Wed. July 10th - Qualifying Offers Expire (5pm ET)
• Thu. July 25th - Waiver Window Opens (2pm ET)
• Fri. August 2nd - Last Chance to Place Players on Waivers (2pm ET)
• Sat. August 3rd - Rosters Due (5pm ET)
• Sun. August 4th - End of Sim (Reviewing Rosters/Making Recaps/Etc.)

CBA

For information about the cap and CBA, read [this post]() and feel free to ask sandman730 any questions.

IRL Moves

Since we are in sim mode, IRL moves do not apply to the sim, except for five key exceptions:

1. Players retiring (if they retire IRL, they're out of the sim and cannot be signed),
   
2. Player suspensions (ex: Slava Voynov),
   
3. Transactions involving a foreign professional entering the NHL,
   
4. An NHL player signing in another league (ex: Liiga),
   
5. Players being placed on long-term injured reserve.
   

Regarding the 3rd point, if the player announces he is officially returning to the NHL or signs IRL with an NHL team, then he is available to sign. Until then, he cannot be signed.
Coach hirings/firings, AHL contracts, relocation, etc. are not part of this sim.

Keep it Realistic

You can't be perfect since plenty of teams could go many ways. If your team is rebuilding, you should continue to rebuild and help the process.
Try not to acquire guys to flip them later. We're not outright banning it since it happens IRL sometimes, but it's uncommon, especially for bigger names. Rebuilding teams rarely take cap dumps to help out other teams in exchange for late-round picks. If it is a fair trade, it can still be accepted. There will need to be incentives for teams to acquire cap dumps. Don't include unnecessary pieces or trade picks too far out (trading picks after 2025 will require a compelling reason). Don't trade the rights to retired players.
We are asking each GM for an initial offseason plan. This plan includes basic things like which direction the team is headed this summer, but with slightly more detail such as whether they will hope to pursue more options via trades or free agency, how they will deal with their cap space (or lack thereof), etc. You will not be able to sign or trade anyone until your plans are submitted and approved. If you wish to amend your plan, submit it via mod mail, including your reasoning for the amendment.
[GM Plan Form]()
Throughout free agency, the mod team will reach out to GMs to see if they are changing their plans due to transactions that have taken place in the sim (i.e. missing out on free agents, changes in the trade market, etc.).
THIS IS NOT FANTASY HOCKEY, DO NOT TREAT THIS AS FANTASY HOCKEY OR NHL 24 BE A GM

Trades

We realize GMs want to be more active than their real-life counterparts but we will be pretty strict on allowing trades in the sim. When you submit a trade or signing, both parties must send the trade to the office of the commissioner (via mod mail). You also must justify why the trade makes sense for your party including how it will affect the cap, lineup, and future roster decisions. Please use the below template. All players, picks, additional terms, rights to players, and salary retention amounts must be specified and identical in both parties' submissions.
Before making a trade, we encourage you to find multiple comparable trades to convince us that the trade is realistic. Please do not compare each trade to the Matt Duchene to Ottawa trade and say "Well, it's more realistic than that one".
We will do our best to announce the trades as they come in. Do not post pending trades in other threads until they are posted. Please allow us at least 24 hours to approve trades and prepare graphics.
Try not to blow your load, especially on the first day. Be patient, especially with trades. Just try. You'll thank us later. Those who follow this advice usually will find incredible bargains and can take advantage of other GM's mistakes.

Trade Submission Template

We would like teams to use the following template when submitting trades to ensure all relevant information is included.
Team A receives:
Team B receives:
Corresponding moves: (players sent down, called up, or put on waivers; answer "none" if not applicable)
Cap/salary implications:
Goal:
Justification:
Comparables:
Other options pursued:
Long-term implications:
I certify that I own the assets I am trading away; my team remains roster & cap compliant; I have complied with any no-trade lists; etc.

Example

NYR receives: Tyler Motte
WPG receives: 2023 4th Round Pick (WPG)
Corresponding moves: None
Cap/salary implications: The Rangers can take the remainder of Motte's $1,225,000 cap hit.
Goal: The Rangers are looking to add depth for a playoff push. The Canucks are looking to acquire future assets for a player on an expiring contract.
Justification: The Rangers are solidly in a playoff position and are looking to buy at the deadline. Motte can fill a 4th line role.
Comparables: SEA traded Mason Appleton to WPG for a 2023 4th before the 2022 TDL. MTL traded Nick Cousins to VGK for a 2021 4th before the 2020 TDL.
Other options pursued: The Rangers also tried to acquire Derick Brassard and Vladislav Namestnikov but were unable to make a deal work.
Long-term implications: The Rangers are willing to give up a mid-round pick to add depth now.
I certify that I own the assets I am trading away; my team remains roster & cap compliant; I have complied with any no-trade lists; etc.

No-Trade/No-Movement Clauses

These will be handled by sandman730, randompunkt, and sarcastic__. If you wish to trade a player with a No-Trade or No-Movement Clause, you must message them, requesting a list of teams a player can or cannot be traded to, or if a player would be willing to waive his No-Movement Clause. Please give them at least 24 hours to fulfill such requests.
Please request No-Trade clauses via mod mail.

Trading UFA Rights

We have tried this in the past and some agents felt obligated to have the UFA sign in the city that acquired the players' rights. We feel it would be best if every team gets a fair chance so this year we will NOT be allowing trading for UFA rights. This will also hopefully lead to fewer trades and more UFA signings.
Additionally, we will not allow you to sign and trade UFAs or pending UFAs.

Conditional Picks

You cannot trade picks with conditions, with some exceptions:

• Lottery protection
• Higheloweetc. of multiple picks in a given round
• Settling scenarios based on previous trade conditions

We realize it happens in real life, but it is hard to track from experience and hopefully, it will cut down on the amount of unnecessary trade conditions.

Unfair Value

To avoid exploitation and chaos in the trade market, we sometimes need to step in to preserve the sim's integrity. This may be subjective so the trade committee will discuss and vote on most trades. Your trade will go through more smoothly if you provide ample justification and can offer comparable trades. Some common issues include:

• Undervaluing cap space or salary - Since no real money is involved in this simulation and no accountability to owners or future cap issues, people can undervalue these assets. Please provide examples of comparable trades.
• Undervaluing future draft picks - Similarly, since there is no accountability within the sim for these assets, unnecessarily adding late draft picks or using too high draft picks can be problematic. Again, provide examples of comparable trades.
• Differing opinions on the value of players or prospects - These usually will go through but may require further explanation.

Vetoes

sandman730, randompunkt, and sarcastic__ will be the “veto panel” and we will take it very seriously. If the vote is unanimous 3-0 either way, then we will accept/reject the trade or signing. If it is 2-1 either way, then we will ask others for their opinions and votes. We will then decide with the majority. There are several reasons why a trade or signing may be vetoed by the trade committee:

• Violates the CBA (ex: puts a team over the contract limit)
• Involves NTCs (i.e., the player would block the trade)
• Puts a team over the cap or roster limit (or under the floor), without them having a clear plan for how to get back under (or over)
• Violates other house rules (ex: trading UFAs)
• Unrealistic (see above)
• Unfair value (see above)
• Goes against their plan (or goes too far all-in on either the present or future)

meatb4ll will communicate veto decisions and discussions.

Entry Draft

Rounds 1-3 of the draft will take place in the chat channel on Fri. June 21st at 8pm ET. We kindly ask that everyone attends this in the chat since it will go a lot smoother not having to wait for GMs and it is one of the most exciting parts of the sim in terms of trades and activity. This is the one day we hope to have all GMs and AGMs alike participate since we require your cooperation. Draft day trades involving players/prospects must be submitted 24 hours before the start of the draft (Thu. June 20th at 8pm ET). Trades made during the draft (involving draft picks) must be submitted via DM to the commissioners.
On Sat. June 22nd at 2pm ET, we will host Rounds 4-7 for those who would like to participate. It is not mandatory, you will just be auto-picked if you don’t show up. There will not be any trading allowed for this portion of the draft.
If a GM cannot make it either night, you are welcome to appoint an AGM to draft for the team, submit a custom auto-draft list, or respect our auto-draft list (Bob McKenzie, then Future Considerations). Please confirm this via mod mail or (if mid-draft) via DM to the commissioners.
Please make your selections as promptly as possible to ensure the draft runs smoothly for everyone. Do not delay your selection to make a meme/image (you are welcome to post them afterward). We will allow 2 min per selection for Rounds 1-3 and 1 min for Rounds 4-7. Each team will be allowed a 2-minute timeout (one per team). We also will take a brief intermission (~10 min) between rounds.
If you wish to draft players not listed on the Elite Prospects Draft Board, you must petition the commissioners via mod mail before the start of the draft.

Qualifying Offers

GMs will need to submit a list of who they are sending Qualifying Offers to, among RFAs, and who they are letting test free agency (becoming UFAs). We will have a thread for this and they will be due by Sun. June 23rd at 5pm ET (don’t pull a Dale Tallon). If you have further questions about this process, read about it in the [CBA post]() and message a commissioner or leave a comment.

Free Agency

We will have 3 RFA agents and 4 UFA agents who have chosen the clients they will represent. Not every RFA/UFA will need an agent and you can find the lists on the spreadsheet, but generally, if the player played 20+ NHL games last season, he will require an agent. For the rest of the RFAs (those marked "Commissioners"), if they were qualified both in the sim and IRL, we will wait until they get an IRL contract and match it in the sim; if they were only qualified in the sim, they will sign for their qualifying offers. For the rest of the UFAs, message the commissioners (via mod mail) with a contract offer. Please justify why the signing makes sense for your party including, for GMs, how it will affect the cap, lineup, and future roster decisions. Please use the below template.
When both a GM and agent have come to a finalized deal, both sides need to submit the contract offer to the mods (via mod mail).
This contract offer must include the cap hit, term, no-trade clauses, and performance bonuses. Please keep it realistic as it could cause a domino effect when using comparables.
There will be the possibility for offer sheets, however, right now we are not sure of the best way to determine who the player would pick. Ideas are encouraged. That being said, it’s more likely a player would choose a contender, hometown, long contract, good place in the lineup, or high salary rather than just picking at random. We also want to mention how rare offer sheets are in real life.
Agents have been sworn under the Oath of Bettman that they will be honest, realistic, and fun.
NHL CBA contract rules apply ([more information here]()). Signing a player in free agency and then trading the player is prohibited.

Signing Submission Template

We would like teams to use the following template when submitting signing to ensure all relevant information is included.
Team:
Player:
Year(s):
AAV:
Other clauses: (NTC/NMC, performance bonuses, etc.; answer "none" if not applicable)
Corresponding moves: (players sent down, called up, or put on waivers; answer "none" if not applicable)
Cap/salary implications:
Goal:
Justification:
Comparables:
Other options pursued:
Long-term implications:
I certify that my team remains roster & cap compliant.

Example

Team: Columbus Blue Jackets
Player: Jack Roslovic
Year(s): 2
AAV: $4,000,000
Other clauses: None
Corresponding moves: None
Cap/salary implications: The Blue Jackets still have ~$22.8M in cap space for 2022-23, which should be sufficient for our needs.
Goal: The Blue Jackets are looking to keep a local player who has played well for the team.
Justification: While Roslovic had an excellent 2020-21 season, he regressed in 2021-22. A short-term deal allows him to demonstrate that he can continue to be a valuable player without hamstringing us with a burdensome contract should he underperform.
Comparables: Ryan Spooner signed with NYR for 2yr x $4M in the 2018 offseason. Chris Tierney signed with OTT for 2yr x $3.5M in the 2020 offseason. Ryan Strome signed with NYR for 2yr x $4.5M in the 2020 offseason.
Other options pursued: None, Roslovic was an RFA that we wished to keep.
Long-term implications: While this contract will walk Roslovic to UFA status, we hope that he continues to perform well and that we can sign a more long-term extension with him once Voracek's contract is off our books.
I certify that my team remains roster & cap compliant.

Extensions

Players with one year remaining on a multi-year contract are also eligible for extensions. We will allow each team to extend one such player, provided the AAV is over $6M. Message the Commissioners (via mod mail) with a competitive offer, and an explanation for why you want to extend the player.

GM vs Assistant GM

The GM is the one who makes the final decisions and who other GMs should message. You are encouraged to speak to anyone including Assistants, but for trades and updates on where they stand, please contact the GMs. The assistants are here to serve as a second opinion, fill in on things the GM might have made unclear, and ultimately serve as backups in case the GM needs to be replaced, for example on draft day.

Respect

PLAY NICE. If people act like dicks in trade/FA negotiations, particularly in agreeing to something and then going back on their word, PM the admins and we'll take care of it. Repeat offenders will get removed from the sim. Racism, homophobia, and other forms of bigotry will not be tolerated. No politics.
If you have any questions, feel free to comment below or DM any commissioner. If we need to clarify some things, we will do so.

Start off by saying that in no way shape or form am I a perfect DM. To this day I'm still learning to better improve my skills.
The four of us started playing in 2021 during the pandemic. I was the youngest (23) while the rest were late 20's to early 30's. After a year of playing in the DM's campaign I took over. We all got along pretty well, and I was excited to DM for the first time. For the players we had the following:

• The Dm of the previous campaign. Comes from 3.5 and as such was more or less stuck in their ways. Didn't like any of the official D&D adventures, and fully believed that everything should be homebrew. Also had a problem of trying to force characters (mine primarily) into unwanted sexual relationships (me and him worked on this and got in resolved).
  • Surprisingly, he was the least problematic and I could actually talk to him about my troubles.
• A very indecisive player who was also a serious anime enthusiast. A min/max player who hates all the races and classes in D&D, and would rather find a homebrew race/class on a random site. Think one of the bigger issues was that this player firmly believed that I was running the world and society like Medieval times.
  • They played young teenage girl(s) and expected to be married off to some noble.
  • This player also had loud roommates that would distract him or try to make decisions for him.
• The last, was the one I honestly had the most problems with. They started arguments with me over the tiniest of detail. Tbh i have no real clue why they joined other than it was something to do on a Friday night.

Levels 1-6: We started off having fun. A lot of funny and epic moments, Of course I was making mistakes like confusing words and stuff. The first instance that things were going bad was when the problematic player had to leave for two weeks for training. At some point the story drifted towards this player's hometown slipping into the Shadowfell, which was part of the major plot of the campaign. The party was spending an extended amount of time in a city at the time, so it was a good spot for them to dip out while the others took on a side quest for some gear and information. Learns of a dungeon that will have something that'll make their time in the Shadowfell easier, so the other two with some NPC assistance go track it down.
I made this dungeon difficulty for the two of them specifically with the help of 2-3 NPCs, After a some hard fights and puzzles they reach a point where they have to go through a portal. Seems like a good point for a long rest, but they decide to push forward at half health. They find themselves in an underground temple grounds, Journeying deeper in on of them realizes that there's an odd number of stone busts lying around and goes, "Ohhh fuck... We need to go, now," Yep, there's a medusa in here, and it's doing hit and run attacks. Turns one npc to stone and kills another before running away after losing 80% of its health. Party drank all their potions of healing they had and continued on. "I want that item and that medusa's head," the anime enthusiast said. They lose track of it, but end up finding the item. Only problem is that it's guarded by 5-6 skeletons that are on fire. Burning skeletons. The anime enthusiast, whose main weapon is a Flame Tongue, decides to throw Necklace of Fireballs (three beads left) into the room. I tell them that the skeletons took no damage from the fire.
Next part is where heartbreak begins. 5-6 skeletons, not a lot of health, immune to fire damage. They have other weapons and items to use against them. They decide now is the time to run. Skeletons are chasing after them through long narrow hallways throwing fire orbs. The past DM gets downed and is surrounded. The anime enthusiast decides to sacrifice the DM to get away. They only get 20-30ft away before the last Npc gets downed. Anime enthusiast shuts down. "But, I don't want to leave my NPC!" Ended the night in a TPK. I cried that night. First ever time witnessing a TPK. I get a call a couple of hours later from the anime enthusiast. "Please let my character live! I'll do anything! Look my daddy is a devil right? We can say that he sent someone to get her body. I can run three npcs to go in and get them! It's a simple solution! Please!?" The next morning I get notifications in the group discord. It's the argument player and he's pissed. He called me incompetent and unfair. Said I was intentionally trying to kill them as payback for earlier session mishap. I broke down the entire dungeon and how everything should've worked for them. but they didn't believe me. Despite all this (and the fact that I was afraid of being rejected) we still continued, but there was some animosity from the players towards me.
Levels 7-12: A year in. My mind is exhausted. Things kept growing out of control. The past DM came back with a cleric/warlock that made things worse for the party socially. Took roleplay a bit too far. Was extremely lecherous to the point I was uncomfortable with it. Anime enthusiast was brought back to life and had a class change. When the argumentative player's character saved their hometown, he dropped it for a rogue with very specific conditions.
The group is in the last bit of what I had planned. Tbh I just wanted it to end, but I didn't want to just end it on a whim. These guys are level 12. They've seen some shit, done some shit. Ends up getting planeshifted to another realm to capture the BBEG. They arrive in a port town that's currently caught in the middle of a war between elves and humans. The past DM, who is also a drow, proceeds to go into the most poor part of the town to spread the word of his god. Ends up surrounded by common folk who just want him to leave. Says he's not going to leave. One of the commoners brandishes a dagger, and he responds by eldritch blasting him into oblivion. (it was like 30-ish damage) A riot breaks out. The rest of the party are trying not to get involved, but ultimately do. The rogue says they want to quietly grab and interrogate someone for information. Told him to roll for stealth. He just outright says, "NO." i said then you are not stealthed. "Yes I am, and while stealthed...." He then proceeded to roll dice for sneak attack and everything like he already hit. On the other side of the map, the anime enthusiast is running and climbing buildings trying to get away from the mob. "I got the movement speed and stats to just do this automatically." The cleric/warlock proceeded to tell the masses that he was on their side.
At that point I just left.

Hi all, I'm looking for some advice on how I can solve a small issue I'm facing. I'm in a long-form D&D game and my character died requiring me to make a new one. My trouble is, how my character develops isn't meshing well with my DM and I feel like I'm being forced to change them to fit how much preparation they're willing to do.
Setting The campaign setting is high-fantasy dealing with extraplanar invasions and threats. The gods have a heavy hand in the role to play and we, as normal humans, are the main focus trying to fix the world around us. My new character, let's call them Vin, was actually my first PC in this campaign and left the group as she felt overwhelmed by the pressures around her (she didn't fit the group vibe). However, I thought it would be interesting to bring them back -changed- after some time spent in the Astral.
The Problem For Vin to make this change, she will need to go through some trials. Not being a 'chosen one', I feel it's important that Vin discovers that even normal people can make a big difference. However, for that to occur, she needs to experience it. Over several months, I had been informing my DM of some interesting shenanigans she could've gotten up to in the Astral. With the hopes that in her one-shot, she discovers something that could prove useful to the party. However, the one shot did not go the way I had hoped.
The one-shot occurred and explained that Vin largely travelled around the Astral before her god called upon her to return her to the material. The only trouble is, none of the change I wrote to my DM had occurred canonically. As the wishes I had explained to my DM were not brought up during our one-shot. What this meant was Vin largely felt the same, for me, and so turned down her god's request to re-join the group. As, for her, nothing had changed since she left the last time. Essentially, the one-shot didn't address the feelings I had for her.
After the one-shot, myself and my DM were somewhat dissonant. We then had a long conversation about the one-shot after the fact where I essentially explained everything I've written above. The importance of how I feel Vin should act and play, and what I'd like out of the one-shot. However, my DM has replied multiple times expressing that her God failed to mention a good reason why she needs Vin to return. Though I've outlined to him that, even with a good reason, I don't believe Vin would return. That her experience and character needs to be shaped by facing something in the Astral. And that she learns something, or gains a power that can help the group, that she had agency in and chose on her own. And not something external, like being required upon or being shoehorned into it.
To this, my DM has asked of me to write a few background events, but has stated he doesn't wish to explore her story beyond a few one-shots. He doesn't wish to give her important details as it would take several sessions to find.
Conclusion So I come to Reddit to ask the many roleplayers on some general advice. Right now, I'm considering perhaps setting aside Vin as perhaps my vision of them is not something that could realistically happen. Or, indeed, if there's another solution I'm not seeing. Any advice would be greatly appreciated!

This happened before the second semester of my senior year. (I just graduated 3 days ago), but here's a little background info. Me (F17) and him (🏳️‍⚧️M17) were friends since the end of Sophomore year. We were very comfortable with each other and we made sure to understand each other's problems and weaknesses. Ex. I get migraines really often or He often panics under pressure. Halfway through Junior year, we came together and rebuilt a DND club at our school. He was DM and I was in charge of communication, location, and any flyers and events going around. Like the project manager of the club.
Things were going fine until the start of Senior year, here's where the root of the problem starts. After the first two sessions of the year, He stopped attending. Another backup DM (NB16) turned into the permanent DM due to his absence. I asked why he stopped attending and his reasons were his grades being bad or just generally being busy with "Senior work", which confused me because they didnt work me that hard as a Senior as well.. But I brushed it off because he is not me and maybe he was working hard. During they semester I had feelings for him and I asked him if we could go on a date to test things out since he would've been my first, but I respectfully turned me down and I respected his wishes.
One day, the teacher-host that was supervising the club said after Thanksgiving break that someone would have to take his place because of his absence. I thought, maybe as the intended second leader I could decide who along with HIS say. But the teacher-host pushed things a little and said everyone should vote. Even when I recommended taking some time to decide, everyone already "voted" me to take his place. One of the members getting him on the phone during this without my knowledge. After trying to settle everything they pulled me aside to talk to him. I'm a bit peeved because this specific member (🏳️‍⚧️M16) spoke to me as if I created all this trouble. But I take the phone and talk to them.
The conversation started with "Why didn't you call me about this?" And I, of course tell him the truth. "I planned to. I didn't want things to go as fast as they did. I wanted more time so I could run it by you.". They accused me of lying to them and I try my best to tell them every detail of the situation to prove that I was telling the truth. I told her that the best thing I could do was either give leadership to the "Backup" DM or to find a way to have him attend on video call to keep his leadership. He said he didn't like "Backup" DM. So I changed the option to just claiming leadership. He chose that and we calmly ended the conversation with "Keep me informed about important stuff.", and of course I agree.
Two days after the incident, "Backup" DM announces in the club chat server that they are moving schools and I panic while pinging him about the news. Then that one Specific member tells me that he quit. He left the server and secretly quit the whole club behind my back and they proceed to tell me it's all my fault for just taking leadership while informing him first. And even mentioned how it could've been revenge for him rejecting me. I shout rightfully, HOW DO YOU KNOW ABOUT THAT? They entire conversation was in private. Just me and him. That meant that he went and told others. And I start fussing and panicking in the chat because now the entire club has to be ran by me and me alone. And when I DM'd him about it, he ignored me. I begged for his attention and asked if he hated me, I didn't call him any names but I told him that his actions were childish. But still nothing... He still to this day never told me why he started ignoring me.
Even after the whole situation is done with, I still stupidly treated him as a friend despite him avoiding me. Telling him Merry Christmas, Happy Thanksgiving.. Inviting to my birthday, and a couple days ago, clapping for him getting his diploma too. He gives me only a slight wave nowadays but this gigantic thought never leaves my head. Was I the AH?..

title, dm by EOD if you have cogs 163 and want to swap during first pass

I dated my ex for 3 years and was married for 1 year. We separated about 8 months ago. I only realized after it all ended how depressed and miserable I was the whole time. I just feel like I need to get everything off of my chest because I still feel so ashamed for staying in such a broken relationship for so long. I am honestly better than ever after leaving, but I have to interact with my ex daily because we still live together.
I will be referring to my ex as K for the purpose of this post and using “she/her” pronouns because she came out as trans F, but keep in mind that for the duration of our relationship she identified as he/him. I hope it won’t be too confusing.
K and I started dating in freshman year of college. Our relationship was rocky from the start, and I would constantly feel insecure because of her behavior. She would incessantly like other girls’ posts on Instagram, even DM some of them telling them how gorgeous they are, and got weird flirtatious comments on all of her Facebook posts, overall she made me feel insecure about what she was up to online. I would frequently bring this stuff up and how it made me uncomfortable and she would act like I was crazy. She even broke up with me a few months into dating, stating that she couldn’t date someone so insecure, before immediately walking it back and asking to get back together. God, how I wish I hadn’t taken K back at that time. Hindsight is 20/20.
8 months into dating, I was using K’s computer (with her permission) when her discord app popped up and I saw countless DMs with people she had been sexting. I took screenshots of all the evidence I could bear to, including a conversation she had with a boy who, upon reading through their conversation, had admitted they were 14yo. K was 19 at this time. I can’t really describe the amount of disgust I felt in that moment. In the messages were images (they were nudes but K’s genitals were blocked by her hand) that my ex had sent this LITERAL child, and K was also asking the kid for images in return. No photos of the child were in the DMs, but I imagine K would have deleted them because it would be incriminating.
I also got a message on my Instagram from a woman who had previously been online friends with my ex, and had to go no contact because K was constantly trying to sext her unsolicited. She urged me to break up with K because her actions, beyond being unfaithful to me, had also made the woman uncomfortable because despite setting boundaries, K would continue to send unsolicited messages. When I confronted K with all of this evidence, all she could do was apologize and promise she’d never sext anyone again, but that she didn’t realize I would consider it cheating. She also swore up and down that she hadn’t known the age of the boy she had sexted because she was having conversations with so many different people and stopped seeing them as real people. She also said something along the lines of ‘no one gives their real age online and they probably aren’t actually 14.’ I found that hard to believe, but K doubled down on this. Afterward, she deleted all of her social media including discord, getting rid of any evidence. When I found out about the sexting, I did tell my sister (though omitting the fact that one of them was 14), and she basically told me that all men are sleaze bags and that sexting isn’t really cheating (I disagree). I never fully got over anything, but we continued dating. I feel so digusting for having dated and married this person who could do this, and I really don’t know how I rationalized it in my head.
K wasn’t any better in other aspects of our relationship and we were constantly fighting. When we did fight, I would try to remove myself from the room because arguments are really triggering for me, but she would always follow me, relying on the fact that our cheap apartment didn’t have working locks, and she wouldn’t leave me alone until I “forgave” her. I would often explode when she would do this, and would also resort to yelling back and saying mean things to get her to go away. I really hate the person I became while dating K. The rare times when I would confide in my mom and tell her some of the things I was dealing with, she would take K’s side, and basically ask if I was ‘being mean’ to her to get her to act that way.
I know that I should have broken up with her so early on because there were so many red flags, and I hate myself for not doing so, I just felt so alone. It really felt like the only person I could cry to about K was K herself and it became a self-fulfilling cycle. A few months after all this, we ended up moving in together because I was kicked out of my dorm during covid and I didn’t have anywhere to go. This is where things really went downhill for me. I had stopped talking about my relationship to my mom and sister because I didn’t want to tell anyone about what I was dealing with, I felt so ashamed. I also didn’t really keep in touch with my college friends during covid so I was even more isolated. I am autistic so it’s hard for me to make/maintain friendships in general and I felt like I didn’t really have a support network. By this point, we were living together and were financially tied together, I was going to college full time and got furloughed from my job due to covid. The next few years I suffered from depression and anxiety that only seemed to worsen and K was the only person I could rely on sadly. I also gained a lot of weight during this time, contributing to my low self esteem and feeling unloveable.
Trust was always a big issue and I would bring up the sexting and other things a lot because I felt like I couldn’t move on from anything. Every time I would bring things up, K would go into sobbing fits where she’d talk about how she doesn’t want me to leave her and it would make me feel so guilty. I understand now that I was pretty checked out, and our relationship was maintained simply because of mine and her codependency, I wasn’t in love at all. There were years where I wouldn’t hug or kiss her or say “I love you” as much as possible because I felt such disgust. I feel like I just buried my true feelings enough to get by on a day to day basis because I thought eventually I would be able to let go of the past. I could hardly handle my life at the time, let alone handling going through a breakup and having to figure out where I could afford to live alone, so I stayed against all better judgement.
I think her asking me to marry her was her last attempt to hold onto me because I was so unhappy, and I didn’t know what to do, so I went forward with it despite everything in my soul telling me not to. Last year, we moved to a new city. Almost immediately after the move she came out as trans (in the middle of a heated argument where I was hiding in the closet to get away from her). The next few days were really terrible and I felt like my life was unraveling.
Honestly, I felt like she had tricked me into staying with her by tying me with marriage. Since the beginning there were signs that I picked up on that she was maybe confused about her gender, and so I asked her about it maybe a few months after we started dating. I told her during this conversation that I couldn’t continue with the relationship if she was, because I’m straight and that wouldn’t be fair to either of us. Like other things, she acted like I was crazy and swore that she was comfortable with her gender and she was just experimenting. She then completely stopped all of the behaviors that made me question it to begin with. I understand that she really could have just been confused, and my feelings of being tricked likely came from the shock of it all. But I also felt like she could have given it more thought earlier on, instead of ignoring the issue for like 4 years. Anyway, a few days after coming out she admitted that she didn’t love me romantically and we agreed to divorce. I really honestly didn’t act maturely through all of this and I definitely regret some of my actions. I felt so angry, because by staying with this person for so long, despite everything, all I did was waste the first 4 years of my adult life.
I was also so upset about the timing of all of it, because she had decided to tell me this right after we signed a 13 month lease in a city with a high cost of living. I still live with her because both of us are too poor to break the lease, but thankfully our lease is up in a few months. I’ve overheard her talking to friends online about how she is forced to live with her ex (me) and how hard it is, but I don’t feel like I’m the one who created the situation we’re in. I am fully over the relationship, because I don’t think I had many feelings for her at all for a good majority of the time we were together, but I can’t get over the guilt and shame of being with this person to begin with.
I actually also starting dating someone very soon after K and I separated, which was another thing I felt very guilty about. It was extremely easy to separate from my ex because after some distance I realized that there were no feelings left for her. In fact I was so happy I’d been given an out. I was really just extremely codependent, and that was easily resolved for me after time apart. I feel guilty because everyone in my life probably thinks of me as cold because I started dating someone so soon after. I also felt guilty like I didn’t give myself time to heal, but I feel like I have healed.
I really just have a lot of regret for the time I lost dating K, and after removing myself from the situation, I can finally understand my own worth, and that I never deserved to be treated the way that I was. So far my current relationship has been sublime and we have strong boundaries. I can tell that me and my new partner love each other a lot. I found someone that treats me with the respect I always wanted, and we don’t struggle with trust issues which is big for me. He is also reassuring when I need it and I feel like the longer I date him, the happier I become.
I hope that anyone in an unhappy relationship finds the strength to leave, because you don’t want to end up like me, and just waste time that you could have been with someone that actually deserves you.

Please limit all vaccine discussions to this post! Got a question? We wont stop you from posing repeat questions here but try taking a quick moment to search through some keywords. Please keep in mind that while we firmly support routine and up-to-date vaccinations for all age groups your vaccine choices do not exclude you from this space. Try to only answer the question at hand which is being asked directly and focus on "I" statements and responses instead of "you" statements and responses.

Above all; be respectful. Be mindful of what you say and how you say it. Please remember that the tone or inflection of what is being said is easily lost online so when in doubt be doubly kind and assume the best of others.

Some questions that have been asked and answered at length are;

• Delayed Vaccine Schedules
• Covid vaccines and pregnancy
• Post vaccine symptoms and care
• Vitamin K shot
• Flu shot during pregnancy

This thread will be open weekly from Tuesday till Thursday.

This post is for a friend of mine.BBA graduate from a tier-3 college, 8/8/7 (university rank 6) and year of graduation (2023) with loads of certificates and extra curriculars.He has 6 months of work experience in a small firm but applied as a fresher during admissions.

• CAT - 98.2%ile (96/99/88)
• XAT - 99%ile (Verbal-65/quant-99/DM-98)) (missed XLRI cutoff)
• SNAP - 99%ile
• NMAT - 242

List of calls received: SPJIMR (Finance), MDI, IIFT, NMIMS Mumbai, SIBM Pune, SCHMRD, CAP Calls, XIMB, BITSOM
Update on results * SPJIMR R1 Reject * MDI - 3000s Waitlist * IIFT - Not cleared in first list * NMIMS - 2200s Waitlist * SIBM Pune - 200+Waitlist * SCHMRD - 200+ Waitlist *Cap Calls - 4 digit waitlist * BITSOM - Converted * XIMB - 100s Waitlist (likely convert)
Finally,Should he join BITSOM this year or retake the exams with 18 months of work experience?

Hello hello! First time poster, long time lurker. I’m 6+6 and have been wearing my Garmin & Oura religiously. Since finding out I’m pregnant, my HRV and readiness has been ASS. My normal HRV ranges between 60-70 and it’s crumbled all the way down to the 20’s-30’s…. Though, my stats had a slight uptick Sunday night and last night, with an increase from 30-40. My RHR usually stays between 45-50 pre-pregnancy, but has been climbing up to 60’s and 70’s and then decreased to low 50’s…. I so regret doing this, but I messaged my OB and she said there’s nothing to be worried about but Dr. Google is pointing out possible miscarriage or CP.
What I’m looking for: is this anything to be concerned about? Did anyone NOT pay attention to these stats during their first trimester?
Garmin stats are similar but off by a point. Physical activity has been limited and I’ve been doing a ton of tread walks/lighter strength training as I’ve been way too fatigued and nauseated to do anything…. Truly hoping that 2nd trimester energy we hear about puts me back on track!

Posting again bc some 38 y.o. jerk who was a former corrections officer, suppposed inclusive/welcoming of LGBTQ+, decided to block me after sharing personal things about myself during a voice call (cause I'm petty)
Being an actual single dad is not necessary, but I'm looking for someone who is mature, sincere in helping others in my case, be someone I can confide in with as guys my age and generation are seemingly worse when it comes to treating girls and it's left me feeling angry, frustrated at the world as much as them.Though older guys are equally problematic.
Also have a complicated relationship with my dad since im a transgirl, only one irl friend I have. And since I was s*xually coerced by a guy in college/uni, I want to talk to a dad figure (single) who has dealt with shitty guys on some basis or guys who know what its like to deal with stuff in hyper masculine environments and despite the toxicity, came out of it w/o not allowing themselves to be toxic and are caring, kind etc.
Idc anymore age wise, but I really wanna talk to guys my age or younger since I'm at my wits end with older guys who freqiently DM me.
Either way, you have to prove to me you're not a shitty guy for me to really feel comfortable around you since I will be closed off at first. How you do that is up to you.
Requirements: Must be able to VC frequently, not a throwaway alt account, from Aus/NZ/EU/N.America (so you wont waste my time after learning our timezones are incompatible)

I don't think I saw a single hat thrown last night for Robertson :(
WHO’S READY FOR HOCKEY
The playoffs are back! And it wouldn’t feel like the playoffs without some friendly competition among fans. And a real prize! I'll send the winner some kind of merch from their favourite team.
Welcome to the Game Winning Goal Challenge for the 2024 Stanley Cup Playoffs.
Last Night's Scorer(s): Jason Robertson
The rules are simple:

• For each matchup on a given day, list the one player for each game you expect to score the GWG.
  
• This means that if there are 2 games in a given night, you choose one player from one team in Game 1, and one player from one team in Game 2.
  
• To make your selection, leave a primary comment with the first and last names of each player you select. Guessing closes strictly at puck drop of the first game of the day. The following morning you will receive a DM letting you know you guessed correctly or berating you for making an incorrect selection. (Please don’t take any insults personally)
  
• Get as many GWG scorers right as possible during the playoffs and be crowned GWG Guesser... Champion... Person... This year I'll splurge and send some dumb prize related to your team of choice for like $20.
  
• You spell it wrong - you get no points. I use the NHL.com spelling of player names, which typically omits special characters like accents. I use a python script to scrape threads so if the spelling doesn't match exactly, it takes a bunch of work to verify.
  
• First and last names are required.
  
• Edited comments are disqualified. If you fuck up your selection and need to change it, delete it and repost.
  

Without further ado, today's matchup:
NYR vs FLA
Leaderboard: Elwood426 11 Nostradomusknows 9 benjamminam 7 ddottay 7 jessasaurusrex5 7 squitman 6 Academic_Paramedic_5 6 YellowMarkerIsGreat 6 diecommajerks 6 MountainBaker8217 5 connor_bedard 5 Escalotes 5 bakkafish 5 sasksasquatch 5 IAmQueensBlvd31 5 TrueBrees9 4 DalekEvan 4 siel04 3 72athansiou 3 ACMop 3 Chris4Hawks 3 tulikettuuuu 3 FlyersLaForest 3 timhoff24 3 shoegazer44 3 Cw2e 2 AccomplishedAd4995 2 NikEhlersDealer 2 sharbendale 2 von_winklestein 2 burgerwaffletwo 2 MillennialWithNoJob 2 Bullets_TML 2 CitrusMaxima 2 bistroexpress 2 DontPanic_4242 2 eltigre6667 2 Ry-Ry44 1 Bill3ffinMurray 1 Beerfoodbeer 1 Stinky_Toes12 1 itsmanda 1 Breskvich 1 migsahoy 1 Vinny_d_25 1 sweens90 1 unholyduk 1 Migifin 1 blacktoe 1 CorruptedReaction 1 e4mica523 1 joelaray 1 WillFerrellisthegoat 1 ycorvic3 1 hurricanepeyton 1 Death2Disney 1 ppParadoxx 1 supermudpuddle 1 ocsic4321 1
PM me if you feel there's a mistake in the scores. ¯\(ツ)/¯ Because It's The Cup

First time ive ever been pregnant.
I've noticed there has been a dried yet tacky substance stuck to my nipples. It's very very smell, easy to pull off, painless, and a brownish greenish colour. Kind of similar to a booger but much smaller.
I'm not super concerned and I see my OB in less than a month so I'll ask about it at the appointment, but Google says it could be dried colostrum.
In 26 weeks and I first noticed the stuff at 25 weeks. Google states it's normal during the third trimester. Anyone else experience this as early as 25 weeks?
So far I've cleaned it off and it has not returned.

I had a miscarriage a few months ago. I'm pregnant again now, (not sure how far along) and I was excited because the first test I took was a "dye stealer". But my boyfriend played with me last night, and I started bleeding on the toilet paper right after. I figured it was probably fine after some research, because I learned that sometimes during pregnancy light bleeding can happen after the cervix or blood vessels being disturbed, and I felt better when there was no more bleeding all night. HOWEVER, this morning, I did notice a light bleeding. My last miscarriage was a missed miscarriage, and had started with bleeding for a few weeks before the actual miscarriage. I'm so worried I'm going to have another one, I need support and advice. I've been trying to make an ultrasound appointment but I'm on a waiting list. Also, I had an abortion at 18 or 19 years old, and I had a hormonal IUD (Kyleena) put in right after, which I left in for years. I'm so afraid the abortion and or the IUD messed with my body and now I'll just keep miscarrying. HELP.
PS: I am pro choice, but there is evidence that abortions can cause miscarriage in the future, especially during the first trimester. I'm worried.

Ok so I’m making this bc I think this is a story that needs to get told not bc I’m asking if this was a asshole moment because I know this was a asshole moment
Now let’s set the stage 8th grade middle school I had my best-friend will just call her Martha and me and Martha met in 6th grade and we have had some falling out but we have stayed best-friends
Now 8th grade is the year everyone gets a boyfriend or girlfriend it’s starts in 6th grade but by 8th everyone is in a relationship so I was super ready for one
Now Martha was in a relationship that she had told me about let’s call him James now she had told me about James of course so I knew who she was dating
Some times goes by and I get a instagram dm from a account with let’s say the name Jaylen on it who tells me he has seen me walking the hall and he thinks I’m cute and wants to go out with me again I’m desperate so I say yes Then I immediately tell my best friend hey I just got a boyfriend She is of course like who and I tell her a guy name Jaylen on instagram and send her the instagram when she sees it she immediately text back that’s my boyfriend
I’m flabbergasted at this point because that’s not the name she told me but I have never seen her boyfriend so anyway we confronted him the next day through my instagram and break up with him
Fast forward a few months and my bestfriend was very naive and sweet and she really loved him I would consider him her first love She got back with him A lot of stuff happened in between but that’s not my story to tell Now because Martha got back with him she told me to start becoming his friend and I was ok with that so I could make sure he wasn’t doing any sneaky stuff
Well in the next few months of school he keeps trying to get with me but I decline fast forward to after Christmas break I have had enough I want to see if this man is serious on keeping a relationship going with someone while dating my best friend So this is were I become a asshole I start talking like I want him but don’t want to hurt my best friend and then eventually I tell him I want to date him so we start talking My best friend has no idea I try to make it seem as real as possible by going to talk to him when he passes by during lunch Did I tell you he is a 6th grader and we’re in 8th grade Eventually though I felt like I had enough proof he was a snake and dumped him Then I told my best friend She was mad for a second but she told me to get back with him bc she wanted to see how long this would go to so I did and i only kept it going for about a week before breaking up with him again but my best friend stayed with him until after 8th grade so it didn’t work anyway but that’s it the time I was asshole

Hello everybody
Allow me to introduce myself. My name is João Victor Vila. I am a Spanish soundtrack composer and producer with a deep love for sea shanties and folk songs.
A few months ago, I met Dave Peace in Brixham, UK. Dave leads a small local band that performs charity shows. When he learned about my work, he invited me to collaborate on a song for the 200th anniversary of the Royal National Lifeboat Institute (RNLI). Here's a bit of the story:
On January 1, 1915, HMS Formidable was struck by two torpedoes from a German U-boat while patrolling the English Channel during a storm, causing it to sink. Of the 750 to 780 crew members, 547 perished, many in lifeboats overwhelmed by the storm. However, 71 men were rescued by the Provident, a Brixham trawler, thanks to the skill of Captain William Pillar and his small crew. They earned the Albert Medal and rewards from the Admiralty. Dave, a member of the RNLI in Brixham, found this story inspiring, leading us to write a song about it.
The Provident, currently in Scotland for tourist trips, returned to Brixham yesterday for a Trawler Festival. Dave and I connected with the crew and performed the song publicly for the first time on the deck of the Provident. We presented them with a framed version of the lyrics and chords, now displayed in the ship's cabin.
Since this project supports charity, we’re reaching out to the sea shanty community to see if anyone is interested in creating a version of the song. We're offering the song for free, only requesting that anyone who covers it shares the RNLI charity link and credits us as the composers in the video description. We're also okay with linking a charity of your choice. As long as this song helps someone we're okay with that. I can provide the lyrics, chords, and a video of the premiere for you to listen. So If you play an instrument professionally or not, we invite you to have a go.
For more information feel free to DM me. Here are some interesting links and a few versions of the song.
My Website: https://www.joaovictorvila.design/
Video of the premiere on the deck of the Provident: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mPqW9-nhIEs
Chords and Lyrics: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1fveurwNmPh2Kv9oh9sQoq1uQfv3Y2QXO/view?usp=sharing
Music Sheet: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1InUbE_Bhh0jjYw7Sv-F0uQkiPjJzyD8b/view?usp=sharing
RNLI: https://rnli.org/

Hello - I have a work happy hour this week and need some advice / good excuses. We mostly work from home but have a happy hour once a quarter.
I’ll be about 10 weeks and wanted to wait until my second appointment / ultrasound (which is the end of June and I would be about 14 weeks) to share the news.
What are some excuses I can use? I could just say I’m fine with water but I overthink everything. lol.
Thanks!

Hi everyone, now that the first window is closed how's everyone doing? Hope y'all managed to get into a course of your choice 😀 Even if you didn't manage to get your dream course, don't forget that there's more than one way of getting to the same destination so it's definitely not the end of the road! There's also the hope of getting accepted through appeal 💪🏻 With that, I would appreciate those who have received an outcome (accepted/rejected) to help to indicate the outcome in the form to help those who wish to appeal gain an understanding of the course intake 🤧
Main Post: https://www.reddit.com/SGExams/s/bVPzf0g5I0
Main Post Content: Hi everyone, I thought about creating this thread after feeling inspired by u/Character-Pen-413 who made one in 2022 and 2023. Personally, the compilation really helped me to better understand the cut-off points and also manage my nerves while impatiently waiting for my acceptance/rejection 😖 I really hope it'll help those of you applying for a place in one of the six universities in Singapore! But of course to make this work, I definitely need the help of each and everyone of you to update your application outcome in the form 🙏🏻 Really hope we can make this work together and appreciate all the help can get! 🫶🏻 Do comment if you have any questions/ comments or realise any errors in the process!
❗Disclaimer❗: Do take the response with a grain of salt since there isn't a way for me to verify the legitimacy of the response
Added Content: Hi everyone! Congrats on finishing the tiring stage of writing multiple personal statements for your applications! 🎉 (my least favourite stage during my application) With applications closing yesterday we've officially entered the next stage: The Waiting Game ⏳ Whether you are waiting for an interview, test or the ✨Golden Ticket✨ email, I want you all to know that you're not alone in this process! With that being said, to those that received the ✨Golden Ticket✨, I would really appreciate if you took the time to fill up the form! 🫶🏻🫶🏻 'MAY THE ODDS BE EVER IN YOUR FAVOUR' 🏹
NEW CONTENT: As requested, just created another form for those applying for scholarships!! Works just like how the uni application form did. Any feedback do DM or leave a comment on this post 🫶🏻
TLDR: Please help me in creating a compilation of uni application outcomes for 2024 by filling in the form 🙏🏻
(University Application Form - Purple) Link to the form: https://forms.gle/GjKRZ5PwPjaeRufi8
(Scholarship Application Form - Green) Link to form: https://forms.gle/P4gjhnsBQycLy8CUA
(Both) Link to the results: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1b0KkdrgaYs-3ZLCkvYQYE3LqHz9oUQ33T-pxGeghM8s/edit?usp=drivesdk
Note: I'll be updating each time I update the results, you can check it out in the spreadsheet as well as
Last Updated Results:
Total Responses (University): 1429 (As of 25/05/2024, 12:16am)
Total Responses (Scholarship): 144 (As of 23/05/2024, 10:18pm)
Edit: Have added an option for those awaiting interview results, do feel free to fill up the form! (Especially those interview courses, such as Medicine, Dentistry, Architecture etc.)

Hey all, I'm just a DM cooking up a bunch of stuff for a possible future homebrew campaign, and I wanted to run it past some impartial judges first.
The main Idea here is a psychic flavour for paladins like AB sorcerers or soul knife. I was really inspired by the aesthetic and vibe of the Ulmist Inquisitors from Ravenloft and wanted to make something similar for PCs. The main shtick of the Oath of the Vigilant is watching (duh) not just people, places but thoughts and emotions. These guys believe that problems are best solved pre-emptively and will even infiltrate cults and criminal organisations to take them down for within. Definitely more hardcore lawful neutral types, but there's wiggle room to make them zealous but ultimately good undercover agents or go full big brother, 1984 thought police.
But on to the actual subclass! Love to hear constructive feedback or if you have any cool ideas that fit the theme!
OATH OF THE VIGILANT

Additional Proficiencies

When you take this oath at 3rd level you gain proficiency in insight and perception, if you already have proficiency in one or both of those skills you gain expertise instead.

Oath Spells

You gain oath spells at the paladin levels listed in the Oath of the Vigilant Spells table. See the Sacred Oath class feature for how oath spells work.

Paladin Level	Spells
3rd	disguise self, faerie fire
5th	detect thoughts, suggestion
9th	nondetection, sending
13th	arcane eye, greater invisibility
17th	modify memory, telekinesis

Channel Divinity

When you take this oath at 3rd level, you gain the following two Channel Divinity options. See the Sacred Oath class feature for how Channel Divinity works.
Deny Obfuscation. You can use your Channel Divinity to pierce all darkness and illusion, for 1 minute you gain truesight out to 60 feet.
Psychic Inquisition. For the next 1 minute, all of your divine smites deal psychic damage instead of radiant damage. Whenever a creature takes psychic damage from one of your divine smites it must succeed on an Intelligence saving throw equal to your spell save DC or become stunned until the end of your next turn.

Aura of Vigilance

Starting at 7th level, you and creatures of your choice within 10 feet of you cannot be surprised, and gain a bonus equal to you Charisma modifier (minimum +1) to all Wisdom (perception) and (insight) checks as long as you aren't incapacitated.
At 18th level, the range of this aura increases to 30 feet.

Perfect sentry

Starting at 15th level, you no longer need to sleep. To gain a long rest you must not move or take any actions, but you remain alert and awake. You may perform non-physically or non-intellectually challenging activities during this time, such as: praying, having quiet conversation or light reading.

Omniscient Sentinel

At 20th level, your enemies can neither run nor hide from you. As an action you can magically awaken your mind and body to become a relentless pursuer, gaining the following benefits for 1 minute:

• You have truesight out to 60 feet.
• Your speed increases by 30 feet.
• You sense the presence of all creatures with an Intelligence of 3 or higher within 60 feet of you. You know those creatures types, alignment, exact locations and can hear their thoughts as per the detect thoughts spell, except you do not need to see them.
• As a bonus action, you can teleport to an empty space within 5 feet (or the nearest empty space) of any creature that you can sense. Additionally, if possible, you may make a single melee weapon attack against that creature as part of this action if you wish to do so.

Once you use this feature, you can’t use it again until you finish a long rest.

First of all, thank you everyone on here for the information, education, sharing your experiences, being transparent, and supportive. This sub is awesome and I love how majority on here aren’t judgmental.
Due Date: May 27th Birthed: May 24th. Condition: Vaginisum Positive birth story, but hard 4th trimester.
Before I start: My entire life, I have been fearing birth. I waited 13 years after marriage bc I was trying to avoid it.
On Thursday, May 23rd at 5am I got out of bed to pee, went back into bed and shortly after starting feeling back pain. I couldn’t sleep that night and was tossing and turning, (Hours before that, husband and I ate at Din Tai Fung [highly recommend if there’s one near you]. It was supposed to be our last fancy meal with just the 2 of us). Shortly after getting back into bed, I started feeling lower back pain. I went back down to the bathroom to see if it’s gas from the food - and ended up doing emptying out soft stool. The pain went away, but then came back - again I tried to use the bathroom - emptied out - went back into bed. Pain came back. Since I was 39 + 3, I suspected contractions but wasn’t sure bc I felt gassy. The pain never spread to my front side - just back. I started timing and it was 4-7 mins apart, lasting up to 1 minute. One contraction was like 12 mins later, so I was confused and also skeptical that it could be just gas, since I had that 3 weeks prior.
2 hours later, we started gathering our belongings for the hospital, for JUST INCASE, but at that point I was pretty sure this was it. We got to labor and delivery around 9am. My contractions in the car were 2-3 mins apart.
Checked into observation room, they hooked me up to the monitor and contractions showed 4-5 mins apart. They did a cervical exam to check dilation and honestly this part is VERY painful for me because of my Vaginismus condition. I was screaming in discomfort and pain. The two nurses who were with me were SO kind and understanding. They advocated for me. I was 2cm dilated. They informed me that I can ask for epidural at anytime and not to go home because if I did, I’d have to do the exam again. Unfortunately, the hospital doctor (not my OBGYN), disagreed and said she’d like me to walk around for 2 hours, come back into the room and get checked again for dilation.
During the 2 hour walk, the contraction timing felt inconsistent but SO painful!!! I for sure thought I was at least 4-5cm at that point. Went back into my room to get checked and ended up being just 3CM. The nurses were excited though because that meant I got to stay and ask for epidural - since that’s what the doctor allowed.
L&D rooms were full, so I had to wait about 2 hours to get one. No big deal, the nurses were kind and took care of me. My pain started to get worse - so the nurse got me to get epidural in the observation room.
THE EPIDURAL: quick, not very painful. It just felt like a pinch. It worked instantly, however - my blood pressure dropped and the epidural spread to my chest area - because I had to lay down flat. I told the nurse my head is feeling light. She immediately ran out to get the other nurse and both of them worked quick to stabilize me. The oxygen mask helped a lot. As far as it spreading to my chest area, it was scary for sure. I was able to feel some sensation in my chest area but not 100%. Quick fix though, the nurse lifted my bed a bit and it started to feel better. After that hiccup, I got transferred to L&D. My legs felt like JELLO!I couldn’t move them. Everyone was saying, “you got the good stuff.” I made sure the epidural button was near me the entire time. I wanted to feel NO pain during delivery. It was great. I honestly felt just pressure - imagine going to the dentist and that feeling you have when they numb your mouth - no pain but pressure.
I was given Pitocin to speed up the process since I was in early labor. I can’t remember how long I was in L&D room, but nurse checked on me often And had be do practice pushes. Also my water didn’t break, so she wanted to do that. My pushing wasn’t so great and because I wasn’t able to feel anything, I was confused about where they wanted me to focus when pushing. She kept putting her finger in and was like “ok push my finger out.” I got tired and felt defeated, but the nurses were still so patient and called my OBGYN to see what to do. They came in every now and then to have me practice push and monitor contractions. Although I was 8cm at that point, baby’s station was still high up. They needed me to practice push to get the baby’s station down.
(Station of baby is important because you could be 10CM, but if baby is still way up high- no point in pushing).
I was given a peanut ball and asked to lay on my side to help with the station and dilation. We kept changing positions and my ideal pushing position was to be laying on the side, but the baby didn’t like that. His heart rate was dropping when contractions - so we were changing positions according to what he’d liked.
There was a nurse change and that new nurse explained the pushing part very well and it made a worlds difference!!! And basically put her finger in my vagina and was like “Focus here while you push, as if you’re pushing out poop but out of your vagina” because the entire time; I was literally focusing on my butt area (as if im literally pooping).
During the labor- my mouth was SOOO dry!!! I suggest hydrating yourself before getting the epidural or coming into the hospital. I kept chewing on ice chips after each push, but that still wasn’t enough! I just wanted a jug of ice water hahah!
I even fell asleep between pushes and honestly, I couldn’t have done that without the epidural!
Soon after; I was 10CM dilated but my baby’s station still needed to make up progress, so we continued pushing - with lots of breaks in between. My OBGYN was also in the middle of delivering someone else next door.
Soon after, the nurse was like, “Ok it’s time!! Let me get the team ready” THATs when I finally got nervous and started shaking lol!! It all felt so real, we were going to be parents in just a few minutes!!! That feeling was so special.
The OBGYN came in and checked me and we were ready to go! I pushed for another 10 mins and he was here!!!! I’m still replaying that moment in my head. It’s hard to describe the feelings in words.
I asked to see the Placenta, so I can thank it for keeping my baby fed and safe. I also asked for a golden hour and delayed cord cutting.
I ended up with a second degree tear and I think it’s very common for first timers. I got stitched up. I also ended up with Hemorrhoid!!! Which I didn’t know was a possibility during vaginal birth (hardly anyone talks about that). I’m currently recovering. 4th trimester hasn’t been the easiest, but this is just day 4. A lot of heavy bleeding, pain from stitches and hemorrhoid. Trips to the bathroom haven’t been easy, but I got my recovery stuff: Witch hazel pads, adult diapers, heavy pads, spray for burns and pain, pain medication, ice packs.
Take it easy and just know that you aren’t alone. There’s been many hurdles and difficult moments the past few days, but surround yourself with supportive people. Dont have anyone over who expects you to host. Only allow those who want to come to HELP you! If you’re scared of going into labor, that’s absolutely valid - but just know that you’ll be in good care, ADVOCATE FOR YOURSELF. If a nurse is giving you a difficult time, ask for a new one. Prepare your partner and be clear about your needs and how they can/should help you.
Thank you again to this sub!! Hopefully, I’ll be pregnant again and back!

I've spent a lot of months feeling frustrated about the Dragon Barbarian I had created for my Half-Orc Bounty Hunter, and debating back and forth whether I should create a new character from scratch or talk to my DM about switching to another class. I settled on the second option and wanted to share my learnings from the first session playing as a Fighter after 10 sessions as a Barbarian (First TTRPG and PF2e campaign).
My main reason for choosing Barbarian was the Dragon Instinct, as I love the flavor, the potential for the backstory (my character witnessed a village being burned to the ground by a red dragon and slowly morphs into one himself), and the feats it enables.
However, playing the Barbarian never felt satisfying for me. I optimized for Intimidation and Maneuvers so I had more things to do than just moving and striking, but I still often just found myself moving up to the frontline, making 2 attacks and killing most creatures/NPC's almost too quickly. Overall, combat had very few dice rolls for me, and the lack of utility, strategy, etc. was really frustrating.
Eventually, the Fighter makeover enabled me to take Combat Assessment to essentially almost double the amount of rolls I do per turn (free Recall Knowledge per hit) while engaging way more with my GM's homebrewed creatures (rest of party doesn't really focus on Recall Knowledge). And Reactive Strike/AoO is just such a gamechanger in terms of the thoughts you put into positioning yourself in combat. The most satisfying moment of the entire campaign for my character so far happened when a Level 5 High Mage (we're level 3) was close to TPK'ing us and I then crit succeeded my Reactive Strike with a nat20 against his spell attack which both disrupted it and killed him the spot. Much more satisfying than any of the, much rarer, 35+ damage crits I've had as a Barbarian!
As a new player, I've also learned that Archetypes can often be used to provide some of the flavor and cool feats that you'd otherwise take a Class/Subclass for. In this case, I've taken the Dragon Disciple archetype with my GM's approval, which will provide the same feats as the Dragon Instinct Barb can take at almost the exact same levels, and without the limitation that they can only be used while raging. Most notably, this means that the fly speed I get at Level 12 with Dragon Wings and the full dragon form at level 14/16 can be used outside of combat as well.
I'm pretty sure I won't regret swapping "you can't flank me" and more damage per hit, for hitting way more often, having a lot more options during combat, using crit specialisations a LOT more often, higher AC. To each their own, of course, but I thought this would be helpful for other players making up their minds between the Barbarian and the Fighter :)
Let me know if you'd like to see pre- and post-change character sheets, and if you have any similar or contrary experiences!