Ativan nausea

hey! so I was on 5mg for 2 weeks and took my first 10mg dose yesterday, everything was fine and little to no anxiety throughout the night (I pulled an all nighter with a friend which probably wasn't the best idea 😭) when trying to go to sleep my heart started to race and I felt shaky; also nausea and the sudden urge to throw up (my usual panic attack symptoms) which is odd cause I usually have my panic attacks at night, but I didn't sleep so that's probably why lol (nausea Is the worse for me since I have emetophobia, even though I know throwing up is my body trying to clear itself out; it's terrifying)
I'm super scared of serotonin syndrome but I gotta remind myself it's rare and 10mg is a very low dose, I have a low case of developing it even if I go on my full dose (15mg in two weeks) plus I have no symptoms, if anything I'm more cold then feverish (but then again my panic does make me shake, too, I know that's one of the symptoms but I had those long before starting lexapro, I doubt it is; I'd shake so horribly before)
did anyone else's panic come back after upping their dose? I had increased anxiety before this (for about 3 days) but it's nothing unmanageable before this panic attack – I feel like it's all falling apart again, but I gotta push through; hopefully it passes soon :"D don't know if it's the lexapro or just from feeling "meh" suddenly
(my doctor also prescribed ativan 0.5mg for emergencies but I'm scared to take it due to it's addictive nature)

Hey there! I (25F) just wanted to weigh in with my personal experience taking wellbutrin for 2 years to manage depression, for anyone else out there who may find this helpful.
Before going into details, I want to emphasize that for managing my depression, wellbutrin was absolutely incredible and saved me from a really dark and heavy period in my life. Further, while stomach issues with wellbutrin are not uncommon, I believe my reaction was likely exceptionally severe (so I don't want to fearmonger).
The Good:
Wellbutrin was a huge help for me. I was on 150 mg for ~5 months and then 300 mg for ~20 months. It helped my depression a lot (though not my anxiety). I noticed on 150 mg my mood was quite unpredictable in a way that was really uncomfortable for me, but going up to 300 mg leveled things out.
The Ugly:
How it Started
While I was on wellbutrin, especially after going up to 300 mg, I slowly started to develop stomach issues. I had struggled with IBS-like symptoms on-and-off for a long time, but after about 3 months on wellbutrin it started to get much worse, and within 1 year of being on 300 mg it became horrifically unmanageable.
Stomach Pain & Diet
I lost over 10 pounds within a month last summer and, for context, I am already someone who has been "underweight" my whole life. I lost the weight really rapidly, none of my clothes fit, and I had no energy. I would take my wellbutrin in the morning (as is generally advised) and by around 2 pm would start to feel really bloated, and it would just get worse and worse until the evening, to the point where I could never eat dinner, or even leave the house much, and would just sit on the couch with a hot water bottle. At one point the pain was so bad a family physician sent me to the ER thinking I had appendicitis! I had multiple ultrasounds that came back clear.
I became gluten intolerant (not even a bite of bread was okay) and developed a pretty severe intolerance to soy (even small trace amounts of soy lecithin in things like granola bars and chocolate would take me out for an entire day)
Ultimately, doctors classified it just as IBS and put me on the low-FODMAP diet. It certainly helped, and it helped me identify my 'trigger' foods, but with being vegetarian, on low-FODMAP, and unable to eat soy, my diet felt impossibly restrictive. But, I felt better and stuck to it.
Eventually, the low-FODMAP diet stopped working, and this past January I had another flareup. This time was even worse. No foods were safe foods, and I was constantly in pain and bloated (to the point of looking 6 months pregnant on a regular basis). Eating became something I feared, but not eating would trigger stomach pain as well. I couldn't eat so much as a salad without taking multiple IB-Guard capsules beforehand and ginger gravol after, and even then it was painful.
Menstrual Cycle
While my stomach issues were constant, they definitely became significantly worse around my period and around mid-cycle (ovulation) for about a week at a time (so 2 out of 4 weeks, rip), and it was debilitating. For 2 days before my period and around ovulation, it felt like I had the flu. I couldn't eat, I would have the chills, throw up, be nauseous, and virtually unable to eat. This lead doctors to think I may have severe endometriosis, despite the absence of period cramps or heavy bleeding (which is possible, but unlikely).
Figuring It Out
I went to yet another doctor and she sent me for some tests, but I live in Montreal, Canada, where the wait times for those specific tests were ~8 months each, and I just couldn't handle it anymore. So, I decided to do an experiment on myself. Keep in mind that because the stomach problems evolved slowly while I took wellbutrin, I never realized it could be what was causing my issues-and for some reason no doctor suggested that either.
I realized that I took my medications in the morning, and by lunch I would start to feel unwell. So I did a trial where one day I didn't take the other prescription medication I take (sprionolactone for hormonal acne)-no difference. The next day, I didn't take my wellbutrin. I had the best day I had had in well over a year. No stomach pain whatsoever. I thought it could be a fluke, so I skipped a second day. No pain. Day 3, I took half my usual dose (150 mg)-horrible pain. So, I did what doctors would definitely not recommend and went off it cold turkey. Stomach problems=gone. It was incredible, and I felt like I had my life back.
Today
Today I feel amazing. I have virtually no stomach problems at all, and I have started to re-introduce foods that I could not tolerate a small bite of before. My gluten and soy intolerances completely disappeared, which was shocking. Last week I had pasta for the first time, today I had tofu for the first time again. Having a restrictive diet was not super bothersome to me after I got used to it, and I know many people live their whole lives with eating restrictions like that. But it is nice to be able to expand my diet again (especially as a vegetarian, being able to eat things like tofu and seitan is sooo helpful). I don't feel horrible around my period at all. I feel like I have my life back-I can go out with friends at night and just enjoy myself and not be in pain, not have to take 3 different supplements to eat a meal, can eat whatever I want on occasional restaurant outings, etc. My stomach problems felt like they took up 90% of my thoughts and energy, and now I have that all back to put towards myself and the people I care about <3
Important: Now, for the first few weeks wellbutrin withdrawal was kind of no big deal. I was definitely tired, but it was manageable and went away after a short while. HOWEVER, a month after I had a full nervous breakdown that was unlike anything I had ever experienced. I was inconsolable for 4 days, and eventually went to the ER, and ended up taking Ativan to get through the couple days that followed. However, I was put on Lexapro (just 5 mg) and have been 100% fine and thriving since, and my anxiety is way better than it ever was on wellbutrin. I should also note that I left a very, very difficult relationship during this time, and it went quite horribly, and so while I would be amiss to not say quitting wellbutirn cold turkey didn't contribute to this "breakdown", I think context is really important.
I should also note that I have a history of having a hard time with prescription medications (so before anyone else says it first, myself or a doctor probably should have guessed wellbutrin was the culprit long before the 2 years). In any case... I had to stop taking Zoloft a few years back because it made me horribly nauseous and bloated, and the same was true for oral contraceptives (I tried 5 different ones over 4 years and all caused horrible nausea)-I now have a copper IUD.
TLDR: Wellbutrin help my anxiety but caused horrific stomach problems (severe and painful bloating, constipation, stomach cramping, nausea) and lead me to develop intense food intolerances (to gluten and soy) and made a strict low-FODMAP diet the only way to keep myself going. Stopping wellbutrin cured my stomach issues within a month, but quitting cold turkey lead to an intense emotional break.
Sorry this was so long, but I hope it helps someone

If you are a doctor, please help give any ideas for testing of illness/disease/rare conditions. My daughter is 19, she was a perfectly healthy child all her life. The only issue she has ever had is sensitivity to sunlight and hives with a malar rash. Starting in November of 23 she began vomiting. It was severe and continued for 7 weeks while hospitalized. Many tests were ran and no cause could be found. She ended up with a picc line and tpn due to not being able to eat. Vomiting episodes last 1-5 days and then have a 1-2 day break in between. The malar rash almost always appears with the vomiting. She has severe nausea as well. Her gallbladder was removed and did not resolve symptoms. The following are the only issues to note: Nausea/vomiting (always dark green bile) Tachycardia during episodes (resting heart rate 125, walking 150) High blood pressure during episodes (145/99) Elevated alk-phos, alt, ast , GGT, Protein/potassium/blood in urine
All imaging done on livekidneys/etc normal. EEG normal, Ana negative (as well as other labs for lupus)
After 7 weeks of vomiting she stopped and was completely normal for 3 months, then suddenly started again 4 weeks ago. She had to have a port implanted due to not having access to veins because her potassium is constantly very low and the IV potassium causes IV to go bad very quickly. There have been no medications that control the vomiting. All meds for cyclic vomiting have been tried long term without any effect. The meds that help her slow vomiting the most are Valium/ativan and compazine as well as phenobarbital. Any ideas would be appreciated

If you are a doctor, please help give any ideas for testing of illness/disease/rare conditions. My daughter is 19, she was a perfectly healthy child all her life. The only issue she has ever had is sensitivity to sunlight and hives with a malar rash. Starting in November of 23 she began vomiting. It was severe and continued for 7 weeks while hospitalized. Many tests were ran and no cause could be found. She ended up with a picc line and tpn due to not being able to eat. Vomiting episodes last 1-5 days and then have a 1-2 day break in between. The malar rash almost always appears with the vomiting. She has severe nausea as well. Her gallbladder was removed and did not resolve symptoms. The following are the only issues to note: Nausea/vomiting (always dark green bile) Tachycardia during episodes (resting heart rate 125, walking 150) High blood pressure during episodes (145/99) Elevated alk-phos, alt, ast , GGT, Protein/potassium/blood in urine
All imaging done on livekidneys/etc normal. EEG normal, Ana negative (as well as other labs for lupus)
After 7 weeks of vomiting she stopped and was completely normal for 3 months, then suddenly started again 4 weeks ago. She had to have a port implanted due to not having access to veins because her potassium is constantly very low and the IV potassium causes OV to go bad very quickly. There have been no medications that control the vomiting. All meds for cyclic vomiting have been tried long term without any effect. The meds that help her slow vomiting the most are Valium/ativan and compazine as well as phenobarbital. Any ideas would be appreciated

I am 30f and I have had 2 d&c procedures 1 year apart. About a year and a half ago I started dating my bf, 22m, and I was very open with him about not wanting kids. I was not on any BC because the methods before have had negative side effects, or with the pill I just forgot to take it everyday.
Long story short, I found out I was pregnant the week after valentine’s. We didn’t deal with it well, we went our separate ways mentally while trying to pretend nothing was wrong. Wednesday March 15th I had the procedure, and one week later he suffered a severe concussion. After all of this happened we still stayed together, pulled closer to each other physically while pulling away mentally, and it almost became a very unhealthy relationship. Eventually we both broke down our emotions and feelings in a tearful and long weekend. It was hard, with a lot of anger towards each other admitted, but it was exactly what we needed to heal our relationship and get back to a healthier place. I didn’t realize that when we did that I forgot to heal myself.
When I got the d&c they also placed an iud, because of the light sedation they suggest it be done the same day.
Valentine’s of this year the anniversary of everything was heavily on our minds, so heavy that on the 12th when I woke up a second day violently ill, we had the same unspoken thought. When I continued and worsened by valentines we went to the hospital, and that’s when I discovered I was pregnant again. Exactly one year later. I was warned about the dangers of pregnancy with an iud, given a prescription for the nausea, some Ativan so calm the hysteria that hit me when I saw the words positive, and then we left. I came back later for an ultrasound only find out my iud had fallen out. This meant I had to go through exactly the same thing I went through exactly one year ago. Same time along, found out around the same time, and my procedure was Wednesday March 13th.
When I discovered I was pregnant I went to my work and told them I would be taking long term leave. I don’t plan on telling my boss why, but the words and tears came before I thought about it. They have been very kind, giving me zero issues even when they easily could have. It has been 3 months since my last day at work.
I need to get back to work for financial reasons (we aren’t struggling terribly but I’ve become financially dependent on him and I don’t want to stay that way), but I can’t ignore how emotionally on edge I’ve been, and I don’t think I feel like breaking down at my retail job. My mind wonders all the time, going from blame, to shame, remorse, hate, and guilt all in one minute. I am on a waiting list for psychotherapy and doing my daily self care, but I don’t feel like I’m really making progress. Sometimes I feel like I’m still sitting in the emergency room with the paper in my hand. I don’t know if working would make this worse or better, and I don’t know what to do. I feel stuck… I feel sick.
TLDR: I had 2 abortions exactly one year apart and I don’t know how to recover from my breakdown.

First off, I just want to thank everyone for your words of support and encouragement on my last post about my then upcoming BMX with under the muscle tissue expanders placed. Reading everyone's comments really helped with my pre-surgery anxiety.
Anyways, I just wanted to update everyone about my experience. I know I was looking for others' experiences before my surgery, so maybe this will help others and provide some encouragement.
I had my double mastectomy on Monday (today is Thursday). I had to be at the hospital for 7:00am for my sentinel node mapping. I had heard that this could be very painful, so I was pretty anxious going in. I had 4 injections into the nipple area - the first two I barely felt, the second 2 felt like bad bee stings. In the nipple. But it was very quick and I felt no pain in the area afterwards. Had to massage the boob for a few minutes to move the radioactive tracer to the nodes, then they took some pictures. Overall, not as bad as I expected it to be.
I then went to pre-op where I had blood work done and an EKG. Everything was fine with both.
Got assigned a bed to wait for my surgery to begin. It was delayed about an hour. I really thought this part would be my worst experience...I thought I'd be insanely anxious but I was actually pretty okay. I did take an Ativan early that morning, so maybe that helped. But maybe I had just accepted it all and was going with the flow.
I was finally rolled into the OR at 12:30. It was a whirlwind of people...one giving me an IV, one strapping my arms down, one putting the compression thingy's on my legs. My surgeon asking how my husband's phone number was almost identical to mine...lol. That's one of the last things I remember and thinking "Who cares?! Get your head in the game man!" Lol They put the mask on me and I remember taking 4 deep breaths and I was out.
Woke up in post-op and immediately thought "I'm awake. I woke up!" Nurse talked to me and I asked what time it was. She said "8:00" and I was shocked. She said "Yeah you were in there for awhile". About 6.5 hours I guess.
I was extremely nauseous after waking up. Threw up a couple times, thought I was feeling better so they had me try to pee. I couldn't, but the movement made me throw up again. Then again, and again. Nurse talked to my surgeon who told them to admit me and keep me overnight. So they let my husband know and he went home, didn't get to see each other.
Got taken up to a room, where I of course got no sleep but my nausea started to subside. Finally was able to pee in the middle of the night so that was good! Lol Saw my surgeon early in the morning and he checked my incisions and saw I was feeling a bit better so said I could be discharged. Anyways, husband came and I got home around 11:00.
At home I've been taking an Antibiotic, Gabapentin and Tramadol. Pain has been very manageable. This was my biggest concern with having tissue expanders placed under the muscle...I was super scared of the pain. I was given a nerve block in surgery, so I do think that has helped, but pretty sure it wore off last night and it hasn't been bad at all. I've mostly been resting in the recliner. I haven't been getting as much sleep as I'd like but I think that's more about being on my back and my mind still kind of racing about everything.
Last night I woke up feeling very nauseous. I'm not sure which medication might be causing that, so decided to cut back on the pain meds to see how I'd feel. I had an appointment this morning with the home care nurse, so I did take a pain med and Gabapentin beforehand. I was able to get 2 of my 4 drains removed today!! Only 3 days post-op, so I was happy about that. I was so nauseous and lightheaded while the nurse removed them, but it didn't hurt or anything. Came home and took a Gravol and had a nap. Feeling much better. Haven't had any pain medication in about 8 hours and I feel good. Pain is like a 1-2 on a scale of 10 (and probably hasn't been above a 4 at all). I've been super pleased with that. Mostly just hurts when I try to get up or do something that uses the pectoral muscles. The expanders do feel tight and heavy but it's really not that bad. And I honestly barely even notice the drains. I have a pouch to hold them and the only time they seem to get in the way is when I go pee. Hoping to get the last 2 out within the next few days as my output is not bad at all.
Maybe I'm getting ahead of myself and tomorrow I will wake up in bad pain or something. But so far this has not been remotely bad or anything like I imagined it would be beforehand. I hope that provides comfort to some with surgery coming up. Take your pain meds on schedule to stay ahead of the pain, and hopefully you won't get to a point of awful pain. I'm going to just take a Tylenol tonight and see how I do.
Anyways, I know I rambled a bit but I'm hoping it helps someone in the future to see how things could go. It really wasn't as bad as I had it built up to be in my head. The pre-surgery anxiety was awful, and really the worst part of this whole shitty situation. I'm feeling so much better now that it's done and over with. Please feel free to ask me any questions if you need to. I'm certainly not expert, but happy to be on the other side now.

Age: 69. Female. 102 pounds. Caucasian. Current medications include Eliquis, Metropolol, various vitamins including B vitamins.
Let me provide some further context; I'm not sure how much of this first part will be relevant:
Late last year, it was determined that my mom needed to have a pacemaker put in to combat heart failure/atrial fibrillation. This was after getting an ablation back in 2020 for A-fib. Note: She has also been suffering from numbness and pain in her legs that started around the time she began having the heart problems. So far, that has been diagnosed as peripheral neuropathy, but no source or cause has been determined. She is not diabetic.
The initial installation of the pacemaker was performed on March 1st but the operating doctor elected to put off the AV node ablation for a month so the Pacemaker could heal in place. The doctor said she wouldn't feel better until the ablation so we needed to be patient but then several follow ups got postponed and we were not immediately directed to schedule the AV node Ablation ourselves.
The one month became two months. In that time her leg pain and numbness worsened. We finally got the AV node ablation a week and a half ago. but leading up to that point my mother was taking Xanax (as directed, often less) to try to manager her anxiety about the situation, finances, etc.
CURRENT ISSUE:
After having the ablation and coming home from from the hospital the xanax as directed no longer works. Her anxiety is out of control and she's experiencing panic attacks, nausea and a near complete loss of appetite.
GP tried to put her on Lexapro but the immediate effect seemed as if it made matters worse, though this may also be because my mother became scared of "Xanax addiction" and tried to cut down the amount she was taking; it's unclear since the last time she tried to take Lexapro a year ago ALSO seemed to ramp up her symptoms and she was taking xanax only occasionally and normally at the time.
Seeing her GP again Tuesday the 7th, the GP switched her to Ativan (3 times a day) and told her to start taking Cymbalta.
The first night the Ativan seemed to help but in day two, the relief it provided seemed to have had inconsistent and diminishing returns.
Her GP has responded by telling her to take the Ativan 4 times a day and do her best to stick with it.
Today is day three; the Ativan she took an hour ago is allowing her to feel "okay" but I am a little concerned with how poorly it worked yesterday morning.
Our current plan is to try to give the Cymbalta the week it needs to build up and start working, but the sheer misery my mother is experiencing is depressing and demoralizing for everyone in the family, and I believe the question of what to do if things don't improve is just making matters worse.
With how bad she feels, we have discussed going to urgent care, but I'm also not sure if that's the right call given that we haven't given the Cymbalta the requisite week to see if it's going to do anything; I'm just very worried with her recent surgery about the effects this is having on her overall health.
Apologies for any extraneous information I provided above. Any advice anyone can provide would set some minds at ease and be greatly appreciated.

I've had this since May of 2020. When it first came on I couldn't do anything, was running into walls, missed a month of work, the world didn't feel real, all that. Even when I got back to work I was essentially gripping the walls for 2 or 3 months until I got used to it. Over time I adjusted and was pretty much able to have a semi normal life for the past 3 years or so, with pitfalls here and there.
Last week I kept feeling back pain, nausea, and I had a fever that would get worse at night. Since then everything went absolutely nuts. I'm nauseous over everything, I'm afraid to eat, afraid to take medicine, can't go anywhere. Everything I put in my body seems to make it worse. I went to the emergency room 4 days ago and they weren't able to figure out a problem. I went to urgent care and the guy noticed and infection I had on my skin so I'm on bactrim for that (which is destroying me.) I'm currently in my closet because I don't want my children to see me like this. I don't know what to do. I've missed work for almost 2 weeks. I have an appointment with a neurotologist but not til July. I have an appointment with a psychiatrist but not until the next end of this month, on the waiting list, the whole deal.
Since I was doing so well for so long I don't even have the medications anymore. No Valium, no Ativan, haven't taken propranolol in years. I made a request to my new doctors (new insurance) for more but I haven't heard back in days and the originally told me they don't prescribe benzos at that office. I think I might have to go to the ER again. I can't even sit still all day without problems and I can't get anyone to take this seriously enough. The ER just does tests and discharges me. I am in the middle of a true mental and physical break and I have no idea how to get anybody to do anything about it.

This whole post might be pointless and extremely long.. but I need an outlet, so manifesting my despair into text will have to do. In the recent week, I have been hospitalized over diffuse stomach pain conjoined with a panic attack. I was treated for anxiety, sedated, then eventually released. I’m worried that the lack of labs is going to hide my underlying trigger for the panic attack in the first place.
It has been 3 days since I had that attack and I am still in agony. There are so many factors that could be contributing to my issues. I have a family history of colorectal issues. I have a history of “CHS”. I have a history of panic attacks. I recently had dental surgery which may or may not have anything to do with anything but my concern was leaning toward infection/sepsis. The feeling while I was hospitalized was agonizing. Like someone had their fist balled up in the middle of my stomach, squeezing the life out of my intestines. It hurt so bad but in a crampy “pins-and-needles” kind of way that would make it feel seized up.
The night before my attack I had overindulged in an entire container of trail mix nuts. Peanuts and cashews, sunflower kernels, m&ms and raisins. I also had a small container of mixed fruit- watermelon, cantaloupe and honeydew. I figured I was doing good by eating fruits and nuts as my diet is usually hot garbage from fast food joints.
That night I fell asleep face down on my stomach around 2am. By 5am I woke up abruptly and in a cold sweat.. in the middle of a panic attack as well so facial twitching and whatnot was happening. It was a MAJOR episode. Something was horribly wrong, I felt so incredibly nauseous but fought the vomit back. I pooped what looked like all my chewed up trail mix peanuts.. bits and pieces all scattered in the toilet. Almost as if I spit it out. Shortly after I was in the ER. No blood work was done but an ECG was needed as my heart rate was ~115bpm. My BP was hypertensive but this is all typical of panic. I was shortly given Ativan and benedryl to sedate me and then released. My oxygen saturation and temperatures have been mostly stable.
It has been a few days since that happened and I’m still laying around in such pain and discomfort. Consistent nausea and it has me squirming around grunting. I have this achey pain in my back that feels related and lingers while I am upright. Heart rate has remained high since my release, breathing still feels strangely labored(maybe because of the nausea though). This isn’t even the end of it though.
I had a dentist appointment I had to make it to today where they determined I also had an infection from my tooth extraction site. It had been around 2 weeks from today that I had a tooth surgically extracted. Today I started a course of amoxicillin to treat the infection. I wonder though, if my problems were primarily from a serious GI issue that went undetected or an infection on the road towards sepsis that was/is causing all my systems to go haywire.
On top of that, this morning I had one of the most unusual stools and forgive me for the detail but the smell was absolutely offensive. SO bad. It was super oily and had the texture of straight up pudding on top of the water. I haven’t had another movement since that one. I also have only consumed 2 ensure drinks in the past two days and one ensure drink today.
That’s pretty much my story and it was good to vent that shit out so thank you for coming to my ted talk. I just want to be ok and here I am.. squirming and grunting in my bed typing essays on reddit.
Edit: diagnoses I have been given in the past ER visits include: Dystonia, Colitis, Gastritis, Gastroparesis, CHS(Cannabinoid Hyperemesis syndrome)
Anxiety/panic symptoms make it hard to relay that the actual problem is in my stomach because I present in such an alarming way and I feel that masks digestive symptoms.

I have recently started to get migraines with severe nausea, leading to not eating for a day or more and still struggling to not vomit
It has been accompanied by brain-zaps and sometimes trembling hands with poor coordination and awful balance, as well as memory loss, painful skin, light sensitivity, congestion and difficulty forming sentences in conversation and a general sort of zombie-like, sort of drunk-like movement. I have noticed, when writing things, that I miss out punctuation and miss out words in general.
When I lay down, it sometimes feels like I can see through my eyelids, almost like a closed-eye hallucination and my ears are severely blocked up, exacerbating already severe tinnitus and causing vertigo.
There has also been bad derealization and mood issues with impending doom. I have taken benzos for it (2mg Ativan), but it doesn't seem to even alleviate it, it's very intense anxiety.
My previous symptoms were mainly issues like seeing scan-lines in vision and mild confusion with some mood-swings.
I have rarely been experiencing headaches alongside this, at least intense ones.
I have taken sumatriptan to no effect. Tried aspirin, ibuprofen both taking and abstaining from nicotine and caffeine. Nothing seems to help, ativan provides a mild benefit and the psych meds i'm on improve appetite to some extent, but I still have issues eating before 10PM lately, and have been barfing it up some days anyway.

Mom has a bad first round on folfirnox with vomiting and diarrhea every day and ended up at the hospital. She also needed magnesium by iv. For the second cycle, the palliative doctor gave her dexamethasone 6mg a day for 14 days for energy and nausea. She also takes one an hour before chemo which is a larger dose along with Zofran. They also gave Zofran under the tongue as needed throughout the week and ativan at night. Wanted to know if this is normal(dexamethasone for 14 days) or just some opinions on it. Currently it is day 4 of the second cycle and she has no nausea or diarrhea

Just sharing my story. My abortion was safe, affordable and done at home. I thought I’d share as most abortion stories are told by younger women. I am 32, and a mother of two school aged children. Mentally and financially I could not have a third child, I was reluctant to choose abortion as I experienced a surgical abortion that I found traumatic but still felt sure that I must end the pregnancy. After doing a home test I book a gp appointment with the first female gp I can ( I was not thinking straight and my regular is always booked out). I am in luck though, because although gp’s can prescribe the medical abortion here they need to have undertaken voluntary extra training to do so. The gp is warm and friendly, she reassures me that we will get this sorted asap. She warns me that because I am so early I will need to wait until signs of pregnancy can be viewed on an ultrasound. As I’m about 4 weeks I need to wait another week to get an ultrasound. For me the ultrasound was the hardest part and I had a little cry in the car park after ( I request for the screen to be turned off and the healthcare professional doesn’t show me or talk about the pregnancy). Before the ultrasound I had a blood test to get the hormone level, you need to do both blood test and ultrasound before getting the medication prescribed. Both the ultrasound and blood test are bulk billed (no charge). Two days later I have a phone gp appointment and she walks me through what to expect. She prescribed codeine, paracetamol and nausea medication alongside the abortion pills. I pay $32 for this at the chemist, the appointment was bulk billed. My gp reassures me that she is available for support anytime and gives me the clinics after hour nurse line if I am anxious / experiencing pain in the process. I take the first pill at 11am and I go about my day, feeling tired and a bit depressed. The second part of the procedure is to take the mistoprostol 36 hours later. Before taking the abortion pills I take the pain killers, nausea medicine and an Ativan I found in the medicine basket. I’m afraid at this point but really ready for it to be over. I put on a giant pad and settle down on the couch with my husband to watch tv. I feel slightly crampy, but I have this whole pregnancy.
After an hour nothing has happened, I then fall asleep on the couch. I truly believed I would be up all night in pain. I truly just slept through the whole thing. I woke up at 7:00 am feeling wet, I had bleed through my pants RIP track pants. I am in no pain at all, I run to the bathroom and sit on the toliet and feel blood pouring out. I hear a large plop sound and see a clot the size of a plum in the toliet. I had immediately felt ‘not pregnant’ and relieved upon waking up. Throughout the day I’ve had bleeding with some strange clots but no pain, only slightly heavier than a period to me. I feel worn out but otherwise fine. Coffee tasted normal again to me which is a welcome surprise. All in all, I am so relieved and wanted to share my positive experience. I’m so grateful that I could just go to my gp to get this sorted and that everyone treated me with compassion. Part of my apprehension was that I had a surgical abortion 13 years ago which I really struggled with, but my medical abortion has been much easier for me to go through. Best wishes to everyone, any questions feel free!

Im switching from 20mg Prozac to 10mg Trintellix due to sexual dysfunction. I stopped the Prozac yesterday but it’ll take weeks to be out of my system (it’s half life is 4-7 days). I decided to start at 5mg Trintellix for a week and then increase. I took it before bed at the advice of my doctor (to sleep through the nausea). I had some anxiety going into taking the first pill because I had tried Wellbutrin before and it caused a panic attack and I’m afraid of serotonin syndrome (yes I know it is unlikely at these doses). Anyways, I took it and less than 20 minutes later I started to feel like my vision was a little off and weird smells. Chalked it up to anxiety. That grew into a weird half-asleep, mind-racing, scared of every shadow in the room, crawling out of my skin panic attack. Any time I’d drift off I’d get a surge of adrenaline through my body a wake up like a shock. I hadn’t had one like that (where you feel like you’re truly losing it) since my first panic attacks. I took at Ativan which eventually soothed things enough to fall asleep. This morning I feel fine.
Does this sound like just an “endogenous” panic attack or could the Trintellix really have caused one after just one low dose?

Hello,
Had my first tumour diagnosed and taken out in surgery about half a year ago, when I was 17 years old. Paediatric High Grade (Grade 4) glioma. My oncologist said they couldn’t exactly call it that because of my age, but it was pretty much glioblastoma. It was about the size of a clementine. It recurred earlier this year, much smaller and in a different location, after a cycle of Radiation therapy + temozolomide. So it was taken out in surgery and I had radiation again because clearly the chemo wasn’t working.
About a month ago I started having really bag vertigo and dizziness when I laid down, at first only on my left side, then now whenever I turn my head. Ive been hospitalised a few times since then but apart from getting the nausea under control the vertigo hasn’t changed at all. It’s gotten to the point where I can’t lie down on my back to get an MRI to see if my nivolumab has been working at all.
I had an MRI scheduled yesterday, I was given Ativan so I could hopefully fall asleep and manage to lie down in the machine but I just couldn’t. I can’t lie down AT ALL. Even to sleep, I’ve been sleeping sitting up straight with a neck pillow for weeks now. It’s clearly tiring but also I’d just like to be able to lie down for a procedure which I can’t even do anymore. The last time I had a proper MRI (before all this) my surgeon said he could see a small mass in my 4th ventricle which he thinks is causing these symptoms. He said a surgery would likely make them worse so there’s no use unless it’s an emergency.
Has this happened to anyone else? Any tips to control the dizziness? I really just want to get this MRI done for now. When it happens I can’t just fight through it, I have to get up immediately.

I don't know where else to post this as I don't have PTSD (i think?), but my friends with CPTSD are the only ones who can understand what this feels like. My nervous system feels like I pushed it over some limit and its completely given up. Any anxiety starts a spiral of panic, ANY sensation does the same (if i eat one cracker for example, it overstimulates me, triggering anxiety, and feedback loops.) Constant buzzing all over my body all day. I'm also going through withdrawals from weed and I'm autistic, making the feelings and pain so much worse.
It got so bad a few days ago I basically gave up and got some Ativan from a family member, but ive since read that benzos can be counterproductive to nerve healing. I managed to set up an emergency doctors appointment the day after that, and he prescribed me buspar, which is certainly helping but i'm really missing the relief of the Ativan. I guess that is the problem lol. Im currently taking anti nausea medication, tylenol, and buspar about 3-5 times a day each as needed.
To be clear I am NOT asking for medical advice nor any medication recommendation, I'm just feeling lost and confused and I want to see what other people's experiences with this are.
For anyone who's dealt with nervous system damage and recovery, what kind of steps did you take? How long have you been at it? What kind of medications are/were you on and how did they affect you? Is there anything that helps? Ive been trying my best to do yoga and meditation but its so hard.

I don't know where else to post this as I don't have PTSD (i think?), but my friends with CPTSD are the only ones who can understand what this feels like. My nervous system feels like I pushed it over some limit and its completely given up. Any anxiety starts a spiral of panic, ANY sensation does the same (if i eat one cracker for example, it overstimulates me, triggering anxiety, and feedback loops.) Constant buzzing all over my body all day. I'm also going through withdrawals from weed and I'm autistic, making the feelings and pain so much worse.
It got so bad a few days ago I basically gave up and got some Ativan from a family member, but ive since read that benzos can be counterproductive to nerve healing. I managed to set up an emergency doctors appointment the day after that, and he prescribed me buspar, which is certainly helping but i'm really missing the relief of the Ativan. I guess that is the problem lol. Im currently taking anti nausea medication, tylenol, and buspar about 3-5 times a day each as needed.
To be clear I am NOT asking for medical advice nor any medication recommendation, I'm just feeling lost and confused and I want to see what other people's experiences with this are.
For anyone who's dealt with nervous system damage and recovery, what kind of steps did you take? How long have you been at it? What kind of medications are/were you on and how did they affect you? Is there anything that helps? Ive been trying my best to do yoga and meditation but its so hard.

posted yesterday but I just genuinely have some questions; feel free to answer all or only some; I love having discussions about different experiences.
how long till your side effects passed? what were your side effects? mine are nausea, headaches and constipation? I constantly feel the need to go but when I go to the bathroom it disappears; super odd
what was your first dose? did you end up going up or down? I'm currently on 5mg but I'm thinking of switching down to 2.5mg tomorrow to see how that makes me feel (my doctor suggested 5mg for 2 weeks, 10mg for 2 weeks then 15mg)
did you take anything with your lexapro? my pharmacist okay'd gravol (ginger anti nausea medicine) and tylenol (which I already kinda knew that, safety check though) and I'm gonna try gravol tonight; I think the main thing keeping me up is increased anxiety and nausea (plus the weird non exist diarrhea? I might try to drink milk or eat more fiber as usually that boosts my bowls)
does your anxiety go up when you think of taking medicine? for some reason whenever I think of taking over the counter medication with lexapro my brains like "what if it doesn't mix?" even though i literally got okay'd 😭 I find myself kinda 'gagging' on medication or it making it kinda worse for a bit, then working; it's like I always have a panic attack when it's in my mouth (I take chewable, it makes me feel more 'relaxed' then taking pills, even if same ingredients; well, used to)
anddd did you take anything else? I have Ativan but I'm very reluctant to take it due to its addictive nature (only 0.5mg but still) I asked my psychiatrist for another medicine for nausea and unfortunately she declined so hopefully the gravol works out! I also heard Ativan with lexapro can make sleep worse? but that's the internet for you, mixed information everywhere; always get your information from your doctor or a pharmacist if you're unsure! they know best.
edit : was gonna just take half a gravol gummy but they're harder then I remember so I took a full one 😩 pharmacist said it was fine as long as they weren't extra strength (gravol doesn't make extra strength I don't think) and the recommended dose is two but usually one works for me. hopefully it works out! ;; after about 30 minutes after taking the gravol I'm doing alright! I think it increased my anxiety but I don't think that's the medication as I've never experienced that before; probably just my anxiety, hoping I can sleep tonight! especially since I have a bigger day tomorrow (plus I'm starting school back up, so there's that! I don't wanna feel tired all day or not be able to sleep :"))

It really helped me to read everyone’s in depth posts so here is mine! First here is all my info:
before size: 38J according to a bra that fits
down to: haven’t looked yet but looking like a C
currently 1DPO
i’m 5’4” and about 200lbs and 31 years old
Surgeon: Dr Terri Silver, Mt Auburn Hospital in MA
She used BMRT, boston modified robertson technique (no vertical scars)
bilateral reduction with side lipo
surgery was 2.5 hours and i spent about an 1hr in recovery
my dr doesn’t use drains
I was TERRIFIED. so scared the week leading up the surgery i was honestly a nightmare to be around- luckily my partner knows that my anxiety comes out as anger. i was very short tempered and couldn’t hold a conversation without being short answered because i was so stressed and anxious about surgery.
I got to the hospital at 6:30am for check in and my surgery was scheduled for 8:30. Once i got there they took me back and did ask me to pee in a cup which didn’t go well since I only live 5 minutes away from the hospital and had just peed at home. I didn’t expect to have to give a urine sample or i would have waited. they said it was for a pregnancy test so I explained my new birth control i was using to skip my period has caused my period to go on for a month now, i was still currently on it, and i have a female partner.
the nurse went over my medications, allergies etc. then she put the nausea patch behind my ear. she had me take a gabapentin pill and 3 tylenol’s for pain before. i had also taken 1mg of ativan before i left the house which was okayed by the drs. to calm my nerves. now it was time for the dreadful IV.
I was most scared of the IV- absolutely petrified, which still doesn’t even cover how scared i was. she went and got my partner from the waiting room so she could hold my hand and i had my airpods in playing a favorite song to calm me. i’m not even going to lie to anyone it HURT and it HURT BAD. I haven’t had an IV in probably a decade. i wasn’t expecting them to put it in my wrist which i’m going to assume is a much more painful spot than others. but i got through it with a lot of tears and yelling owww! and making jokes i was probably the biggest 31 year old baby the nurse had seen. she had great bedside manor and told me she was proud of me.
then the nurse who would be attending in the surgery went over some of the same things like meds allergies etc, anesthesiologist came in and did the same, then finally my surgeon and her PA came in. She did the marking which took her all of 1 minute- it was facisnating to watch. she asked me to remind her what size i wanted and i said ideally B or small as possible but i know she told me she could only safely get me to a C and to just do her best to get out as much as she can.
I signed some paperwork i was so scared i didn’t even read it. then the anesthesiologist came in and gave me what they called the “i don’t care drug” and wheeled me off! once i got to the operating room i remember chatting with them for a few minutes before absolutely knocking out.
I woke up in recovery and felt totally fine without pain. I sipped the water they gave me and honestly sobbed for the whole time I was there. my mom recently passed only 4 months ago in December and all the anesthesia and drugs had just gotten to me and the fact i went through my first surgery and got through the IV and everything without my mom being there with me or to tell me she was proud of me really stung. the doctors were so sweet and did let me bring my moms prayer card into the surgery room they told me to keep it in the little pocket on the hospital gown so it was close to me. when i woke up in recovery it was in my hand, which also made me emotional. but other than that i felt great waking up, i got dressed and went home. as the nurse was wheeling me out to the car i did feel slightly nausea which i wasn’t expecting but it passed quickly.
when i got home i went right into my recliner chair with my pregnancy pillow which was like laying on a cloud. I slept for about 6 hours. my aunt made me a home made ice cream cake so i had 2 pieces of that then soup my mother in law made a little later followed by two slices of lemon blueberry toast with butter. i had a fine appetite and drank 2 bottles of water. my girlfriend and her mom are taking care of me but i honestly haven’t needed them too much. we watched a movie and i got tired around 10pm still no pain but i do struggle with insomnia so i decided to take one of the oxy’s they prescribed in hopes it would help me sleep through the night. i slept through the night without waking but i did wake up at around 6am which was earlier than i would have liked
so i’m writing this in current time 7am at 1DPO and i’m just doing great with a tiny bit of pain this morning when i tried to use my arms to push myself up in the chair (that was my bad) but other than that i’m doing great!
10/10 would recommend this surgery and i would do it again, my neck and back pain were gone right away, and my girlfriend said i look taller.
if anyone has a specific questions i’d love to help!!

I (30f) just got home from the Emergency room. I went in for shortness of breath/throat closing up feeling, GI symptoms such as constant severe gnawing pain that gets worse after eating, bloating, nausea, diarrhea, flushing of the face, feeling hot/sweaty with no fever, brain fog, thick mucus in the back of my throat after eating certain foods, heart palpitations, frequent urination and uti symptoms without a confirmed uti. Also I’ve had chronic hives for almost 2 years.
I had a gastroscopy on Monday. Prior to the gastroscopy my doctor and I believed that I had either gastritis or ulcers, but the results were completely clear. No cancer, nothing. I had been taking a PPI (proton pump inhibitor) for three weeks already and had no improvements in my symptoms at all, in fact the ppi is making me feel worse. I’m taking it every second day at this point but I actually feel worse on days when I have taken it.
While at the hospital, the only test I was given was to check my blood pressure. No blood tests or urine tests or other tests of any kind were done. In the waiting room I started to feel faint and had a near-fainting episode where I felt so close to fainting but I didn’t. I have fainted in the past and have diagnosed orthostatic hypotension. I had a lot of sodium yesterday so I’m not too sure why I still felt so faint.
When I finally got to see the doctor I started to go over my list of symptoms but he cut me off halfway through to try and tell me that he thinks all I have is acid coming up my throat causing the throat tightness/mucus. I asked him how can I have that if I don’t have acid reflux or anything wrong with my gastroscopy? He didn’t really say anything to explain just like repeated himself. I tried to say that I still have more symptoms that he hadn’t let me finish listing and he reluctantly “listened” to them (more like pretended to listen) and then pretty much cuts me off again at the end to tell me that I’m not experiencing an emergency, and pretty much implies that I shouldn’t be here. He also accused me of being angry (yes I was frustrated but I did not raise my voice) and rolling my eyes at him when all I did was make this face: 😐 after he suggested that I only have acid coming up my esophagus. I asked him could this be a problem with my mast cells? He said he’s “not an allergist” so he can’t tell me. I asked if I could have a serum tryptase test to test for mast cell activation. He said that they don’t do that test in the emergency room and that I’d need to get a referral from my family doctor for that?! I asked him what can I do about the rest of my symptoms and the severe pain I’m in, to which he just gave me a prescription for some pain medicine and he gave me some steroids to “test” to see if they do anything for my other symptoms.
Now here’s where things get complicated. I have been trying to get to the bottom of this for 2 years now since I first had an allergic reaction to Ciprofloxacin while previously in the hospital to have my gallbladder removed. This is what first caused the hives. I’ve ruled out so many things and done so many tests over the last 2 years that now doctors think I’m “hysterical” or a “hypochondriac”… My doctors office has told me I can’t have any more appointments as I already have the maximum number of appointments (two) but I have completely separate issues that are also serious health concerns that I need those appointments for. Apart from those I need about 5 more appointments to address the concerns I have.
I’m just looking for advice/reassurance because I’m so close to giving up on this. I just start to believe the doctors that nothings wrong with me until the symptoms get worse again and then I still feel like an imposter because the doctors don’t believe me or even test me 😫 Please tell me someone else has been through this 🙏🏻
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Edit/Update: Thank you to everyone who replied and offered advice! After consulting many health professionals and a friend who is a nurse I determined that what I was experiencing was extreme side effects from the PPIs. I didn’t realize at the time that my perception of my symptoms was a bit of an overreaction. I’m autistic and I struggle with interoception issues. Side effects that I was experiencing include extreme anxiety, impending sense of doom, extreme panic, elevated heart rate (118 at rest one time), worsening stomach pain, unusual weakness (to the point that I could not speak at times), joint pain, headache, confusion, chest tightness, nausea, diarrhea (for 4 days!), indigestion, bloating, flushed skin, increased hunger, sweating, vomiting, among others… At the end of the day I know my own body the best and I decided to stop the ppi when I had a gut feeling to do so.
https://www.reddit.com/GERD/s/tx2co1gy9r This is a very helpful post that discusses the (very real!) serious side effects I was having. The comment by user DyslexiaPro describes exactly how my symptoms progressed only I took the ppi for a total of 23 days so things only got worse for me. 😣
Now as for the outcome of this, I actually do think I might have acid reflux, although most likely I have “silent reflux” and the reason I think this is because histamine regulates stomach acid. So I now believe the doctor’s theory is correct but my theory could also be correct. Now to wait for the urgent referrals to an immunologist and gastroenterologist! 🤞🏻🙏🏻 I’m now getting a cold from all the hospital and doctor trips and taking Ativan for the panic attacks but I feel 10x better than when I made this post! 😊

Hi, as background Mom was diagnosed in late Jan with s4 and has received 5 rounds of NALIRIFOX with the last one several days ago omitting onivyde due to nausea. In general she tolerated the first rounds of treatment well, with the primary side effect being limited nausea in the days that followed. But usually it subsided and things got better 3-4 days after the 5FU pump came off.
After round #4 (2 weeks ago) however, the nausea didn't go away and we've been trying seemingly everything. As of yesterday we were admitted at OSU's James inpatient hospital because there hasn't been a meal without vomiting. I listed out most of the things we've tried below with very limited success. She'll eat (still has appetite), things will stay down for a few hours and then she'll just feel a gurgling and know that it's going to come back up. I've also noticed needing to burp more after eating than in prior weeks. She does feel better after getting sick, even if we know it's not a solution. She's lost 20 lbs in the past 2-3 weeks as a result.
Has anyone had success outside of the below? Any other experiences with *prolonged* inability to keep food down and vomiting? While they're closely monitoring her / administering potential solutions via IV in the hospital now, I still wanted to ask this community since it's been helpful for my earlier questions. It's so frustrating because it's really the only primary symptom at the moment and we haven't had a day with relief in weeks.
Have or are currently trying:

• Reglan
• Ativan
• Zofran
• Compazine
• Haldol
• Taking CREON when eating
• Extending taking the dex steroid after treatment
• Some THC gummies

Here to say that I officially ended my infusions 4/19/24! My "journey" has been a bit of a mess and took a lot of detours. I wanted to share because I think sometimes we all expect things to go by the book but most of the time they don't because each of our "journey's" is unique to us and our circumstances (also, I hate the word journey, but not sure what else to call this! A hellish marathon? lol). This will be a long post! My hope is that others read it and see that this can be a long (and winding) road, but there's a finish line. If after reading this you have any questions, feel free to comment and I will answer to the best of my ability!
I was diagnosed with triple positive stage 2b in June 2022 (age 31), I proceeded to get additional biopsies, imaging, and discussing treatment options with my medical team through July 2022. My tumor size was bigger than 5cm, which made me a candidate for neoadjuvent chemo (so chemo before surgery).
For most of August 2022 I then underwent fertility preservation which in my case was egg freezing. In the end I had about 9 viable eggs preserved.
I started 4 infusions of TCP (as part of a trial I opted to be in) in September 2022. Finished those 4 infusions around end of November 2022. My main side effects were fatigue for about a week, constipation, brain fog, and nausea (sometimes accompanied with heartburn if I ate the wrong thing). During infusions I did Dignicap (cold capping) and was able to offset the costs through the organizations Sharsheret and Hair to Stay, so a big thank you to them.
All throughout treatment (and still currently as part of my hormone treatment) I received Zoladex injections to protect my ovaries. My main side effect from this is vaginal dryness and the occasional hot flash. I have some joint stiffness in the morning, but I've noticed that it's mostly from chemo/immunotherapy and goes away a few days after an infusion. I have been using Revaree suppositories (not super consistently admittedly) to offset vaginal dryness.
Surgery was scheduled for Jan, so I had a Herceptin and Perjeta infusion in December 2022 as part of maintenance. Jan 2023 I had a lumpectomy with a breast lift for symmetry. The lumpectomy revealed residual cells in the removed tissues, so the protocol for the trial required 2 additional full rounds of TCHP, which I finished around March or early April 2023. I cold capped for those last 2 full chemo sessions as well. In the end I kept about 80% of my hair which I am very thankful for (and honestly the 20% I lost was not noticeable to anyone but me who would see the hair in the shower, on the brush, on the floor, etc.). I tolerated the cold capping ok (I also iced hands and feet) with just Tylenol, but I know some folks also get Ativan.
Due to residual cells in the removed tissue, protocol also called for 14 Kadcyla (if no residual cells, then it would have been just Herceptin and Perjeta). Kadcyla was honestly the roughest part of me (although I'm in the minority it seems, but I'll talk about my experience with Kadcyla a bit further down).
I started photon radiation (after a long, unsuccessful, struggle with my insurance to get proton radiation approved) around mid May 2023 and finished mid June 2023. My skin tolerated radiation well. I used fresh aloe vera gel from a plant I have and also calendula gel/cream I bought. I used these multiple times a day. I did not wear them during the actual radiation of course (as indicated by my radiation team), so I would shower before heading out so my skin was clean prior to radiation, got radiation, and then immediately after finishing my daily session I would go into a bathroom at the hospital and apply calendula (simply because it was less messy to deal with in public than the aloe) and then switch to aloe at home.
I started Anastrozole I believe August 2023 and have continued on it since then. I have not noticed any side effects on it (besides being in menopause of course, but Zoladex did that first lol).
For the most part during radiation I did not get Kadcyla. Kadcyla honestly for me was rough. I had a lot of side effects (more than other folks seem to experience). It was a bummer honestly, because it's very much framed as being easy (and I'm sure it is for some people) but it was not for me. Because of my hard time with side effects my Dr. was ok with pausing Kadcyla during radiation, but I know some folks get it at the same time. For me the Kadcyla side effects were similar to regular chemo. Sometimes side effects were shorter in duration but WAY more acute in terms of nausea, brian fog, or fatigue. I also had the new side effect of debilitating migraines (and NOT just the week after infusion, they spring up basically when I've pushed myself too hard). One time the fatigue was so much I couldn't will my arms to move while I was on the couch, I asked (in TEARS at the Dr.s office) for a dose reduction after that. Once I had the dose reduction it helped but not completely (less of a zombie, but still not great).
My liver was also not liking Kadcyla, which meant my liver enzymes were increasing/too high at the 3 week intervals (almost since the second infusion) so I was often getting infusions at 4 weeks instead. This REALLY prolonged my treatment and fucked with my mental health. It was hard for me to grapple with having to go in once every 3 weeks just for shits and giggles when we all knew my infusion would most likely get pushed back for next week based on my blood work. For other people (not getting treatment) having to go in that extra day maybe just seems like part of the deal, but for people who feel sick and just want to rest or manage the rest of their lives (whether to have fun on a day they actually feel good, or work, or whatever other thing regular life demands of you), an extra day wasted at the hospital is shit. It was a waste of everyone's time, and really limited my ability to move on with my life. I tried to advocate for changing the schedule to every 4 weeks more officially, but my Dr wanted to keep 3 weeks incase there ever was a chance I could actually get it on that 3rd week (never happened). I would say this was the only time I really disagreed with what was going on with my treatment.
By Jan 2024, I was switched to Herceptin and Perjeta alone because my liver was just not liking Kadcyla. But it turns out it also didn't like this combo either, so I then got switched to just Herceptin. I made it to 19 (original plan was 20) total infusions that included some sort of Her2 immunotherapy (chemo, kadcyla, or herceptin with or without perjeta). Friday, 4/19, my Dr. said that 19 was good enough and there was no reason to continue to irritate my liver. So I'm officially done!
I know this post is long, but I wanted to add that life still went on while all of this happened. I worked (I only took intermittent leave during chemo and Kadcyla, I did take short term leave after surgery for about 3 weeks, and for the last 2 weeks of radiation). I'm luck though that my job is mainly remote, and when there were in person events I had supportive coworkers who covered for me.
I traveled too. I'm in Florida so Disney is an easy trip/escape and have managed to go 4 times (for short weekends) since finishing the main portion of my chemo (so since May 2023). If you're thinking about a Disney trip, make sure to use their disability access service which helps with ride wait times (if anyone has questions about this I can talk more about it). I also went to Puerto Rico and North Carolina for friends' weddings, and attended other weddings more local to me. I spent time with my family, partner, and friends when I could and felt ok to do so. I picked up new hobbies like gardening and embroidery, and have learned to slow down and reflect on what things in life really matter to me. Loss also happened, I lost my grandmother, an aunt, and a cousin (deaths unrelated to cancer). I think the second biggest lesson I've learned was that life goes on. It does not pause for us undergoing cancer treatment. It is both wonderful and painful all at once to realize this.

Dizziness started in mid November 2021, went to Canberra on the 10th of December and I had my first near faint experience followed by high heart beat and palpitation.
Dizziness and lightheaded was followed till the 28th of December when I nearly fainted again and had really high heart rate: went to hospital. They did blood work and ecg couldn’t find a probable cause. Went to hospital again 3 days later and no findings were evident. Upon my 3rd visit to hospital X-ray was done off my chest and nothing was found. I was bedridden for 6 weeks, everyday was a battle for life, I felt like I was in septic shock everyday. I had to get iv fluids about 10 times because of dehydration, I sweated constantly with no appetite for water or food.
Symptoms
Lightheaded Dizziness Heart gets tired quickly Sometimes my arms and hands become a little numb. My head feels tension. heat in my abdomen, back and my ears get hot. Feels like a pulsating feeling through my body during a bad episode Sometimes left shoulder feels warm My eyes sometimes drop tears randomly Unable to concentrate at times Shortness of breath during episode There’s always a tense feeling in my chest and around my heart area. Sometimes hits my lower abdomen and I feel nausea makes my stomach make noises. I have difficulty sleeping my head spins more when I close my eyes. I wake up between 1-3am with a weird feeling as if I’m scared or something. Vision sometimes becomes blurry. Fatigue and tiredness. Little sudden Noises scare me. Whenever I have a episode that peaks, my hands and feet get sweaty and I feel heat. My hands and feet sometimes get cold. The feeling in my mid left chest area I can’t explain but it’s as if my muscles are vibrating. When I stand up it’s seems my head and chest symptoms get worse for about a minute and then settle down. Same thing happens when I lay down. It gets worse for a minute till it goes back to how it was. Sometimes I can feel it hitting my front part of my head and my sinus feels tense as well. As well as my ears feel the pressure. Lying down seems to reduce some tension in my head. I feel bad 80% of the day really bad 15% of the day and alright 5% of the day.
I believe my anxiety is chronic, it’s Been with me since a young age I just didn’t realise until it became severe. I do worry about everyday situation too much when I think about it now and believe things that aren’t even real. I got sick around November, one day I just woke up and I was dizzy and brain foggy. It was persistent and didn’t go away, over the next month it got worse until I got to a point I couldn’t breathe and got hospitalised. All tests came back negative and they sent me home. This was a on going cycle 6 times in and out of hospital, nothing was helping. So I went to my gp and she said it’s most likely anxiety. After this point I think I broke the anxiety inducing cycle. Even though my worries and trauma are past the physical and cognitive symptoms are still here or at least in my subconscious. My trauma last year was my business got burnt down by our competition and my now wife which was a fiancé back at the same time the store burnt in which I had trust issues with. My parents had told me she’s probably using me to gain citizenship etc, so I was always worried about this and thought she might not love me. So I believe these 2 events were too great for me.
Let’s go back to my childhood, my earliest memory is probably when I was around 10. If I would focus on my breathing it felt like I couldn’t breath anymore. I also had these unexplained spinning and dizziness at a young age during sleep time. Doctors couldn’t find anything. I was always a scared kid thinking about the worse case scenario that might kill me but in reality it was overthinking. In highschool a few times I nearly fainted out of the blue. Sometimes during sports I’ll hit a point where out of no where my heart would start racing and my breathing would become laboured. Sometimes over excitement caused this as well.
Now medications
Lexapro 40mg for 6 months, no benefits. Made me really bad during the first 2 weeks and kinda of settled after that, dumbed the depressive symptoms but that’s about it. Felt much better after coming off, it definitely made my condition worse. Derealisation, fatigue, tiredness, forgetfulness. All of it.
Zoloft 50mg for 18 days and 100mg for 3 days, had a panic attack on day 3 I thought it was Zoloft but found it to be thc later on. Discontinued Zoloft then. No benefits during the 18 days on 50mg and made my condition way worse.
Paxil 20mg for 2 months, probably one of the strongest reactions to any ssri, daily panic attacks losing my mind, as if there’s a laughter in my head but it’s my internal monologue creating it but still I was losing it. Pushed on for 2 months and it just made me worse as the days went on.
Agomelatine 20mg no benefits, daily panic attacks, took it for about 36 days.
Pristiq, I’m on day 54 and I’ve stopped taking it, my last dose was on Wednesday not sure how to stop. It’s making me worse, mood is swinging, brain fog and all other symptoms are reappearing on this medication.
Clonidine didn’t do much except relax my body alittle
Lyrica, knocked me out at 25mg and made me tired. No benefits.
Valium 5mg, very small relief, short benefits 3-5 hours, more of a muscle relaxant, addictive in nature.
Clonezapam 1mg, small amount of relief, short relief 3-5 hours.
Xanax 2mg, haven’t tried
Ativan 1mg only have tried 0.5mg and it didn’t do much.
Seroquel 25mg, good for sleep, couldn’t sleep for more then 4 hours for the last 5 years or so, now I get a solid 8 hours, it’s not a 100% good quality sleep but it gets the job done, I don’t feel tired through the day as before I got sick.
Epilim haven’t tried chickenend out
Lamictal discontinued on day 3 after developing rash
Lithium 500mg, 37 days. Left like losing my mind not sure if adverse reaction to the lithium or it was some kind of discontinuation I was getting from the lexapro.
Prozac 4 days to bridge off lexapro
My original physiatrist is Dr Ismail Raiz, he diagnosed me with, GAD, panic disorder, Agoraphobia, ocd, somatisation disorder. I respect him, though I haven’t gotten the results I want and he told me my only relief will be benzos as I haven’t responded to modern medicine.
I moved onto Dr Fatma Lowden after about 12 months of treatment with Dr Raiz, I’ve only seen her 3 times as she had to relocate to overseas and told me to see you and that’s howpq I came to know about you. She told me I might have another underlying mental condition that is causing the anxiety, she floated the idea of bipolar, thought she wasn’t too sure and said I’m an unusual case.
Thc/cbd oil, made me go full panic mode for 4 hours each time I tried it. Very similar to what I was feeling with the Paxil minus the laughter side effect.
Symptoms
Dizziness Burning tongue Headache Nausea Metallic taste in mouth Hot flushes Muscle pain and tension Fatigue Numbness in hands Pins and needles Brain fog Startled easily Blood pressure problems Heart feeling heavy Fast heart beat Feel like I’m dying Losing my mind Losing control Very negative thoughts Intrusive thoughts Hyper reactive Blurry vision Cold palms and feet Sweaty palms and feet Hot flushes Feeling sick / flu like Weak limbs Digestion problems Numbness Nightmares
Currently my biggest challenges are
I think I’m developing schizophrenia all the time, and I’m going to lose my mind.
I’m hyper vigilant and see things in the corners of my eye.
My physical symptoms cycle throughout the weeks and I’m never symptomsless. Physical or cognitive I always feel something.
My mind always feels like as if something is off,
As my overall condition gets worse my brain fogs becomes really bad and my hands and feet become so cold to the touch,
I become very forgetful
I can never stop thinking about my condition, my mind is occupied by it 24/7
When I go into crowded areas my physical symptoms become much worse, such as brain fog heart rate and jelly legs.
My internal monologue never shuts up and it’s always active.
Racing thoughts
When I’m on medications l as ssri’s I get irrational fears such as being allergic to nuts or something crazy. But seems to go away after a month when discontinuing the medication,
Lightheaded, feel like my neck muscles are so tense that my brain isn’t getting enough blood.
I’m hyper focused on all bodily functions physical or Cognitive, if I suspect something that is schizophrenic or damaging I get a mini panic attack. But panic attack do occur for no reason as well most of the times.
I’m in this state constantly let’s say chronically,
When my condition worsens and it’s at full flip, no amount of logic can override my thought process, I just believe I’m dying because the physical sensations are just toooo strong that I want to jump out of my skin. I don’t know how to explain it but it’s a weird feeling. Agitated state, dizzy, wobbly, can’t focus etc.
Something else is weird sometime when I’m having a super bad panic attack, such as my heart racing at 180bpm, my cognitive focus will be on my heart and my condition will disappear? I’ll actually feel normalised, mentally and physically. Something happed with the thc, my nausea and cognitive and physical symptoms had been relived but then panic set in. It’s like it suppressed the anxiety symptoms but aggravated the panic if that is possible. Sometimes if I truely focus on something, a lot of it all goes away for a few milliseconds. Kind of same feeling after a massive panic attack, when the panic subsides before it’s next hit I’ll feel my condition/anxiety problems actually settle to better then base levels before priming back up.
Mental illness problems are prevalent in my family,
Grandma had exactly what I’m dealing with maybe slightly different, she only got better after developing alzhimers this time around, apparently she relapsed a few times in her life.
Sister has mdd but is doing very well on venlafaxine 225g
Mum has anger issues maybe bipolar unsure.
Grandma’s issue was being left home alone gave her anxiety which is what I call active anxiety but after a while with continuous active anxiety it developed into passive anxiety, where’s it’s on autopilot without a trigger. Before alzhimers took my grandmas’s mind she told me in Turkish, I got sick because I was continually scared all the time and her referring to as sick is anxiety on autopilot or her nervous system breaking down from the stress idk which is which. But I’m on the same boat.
I’ve done all the physical body checkups before the anxiety diagnosis. Everything check out well physically.