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You are not recommended to try spells to bring a lover back if you are going through the following: You know that your relationship with your ex is toxic and the best painful option to take in this is to move on. It is not a good choice to be in a relationship that is un-natural, one that is built on witchcraft. The love spark as to be their at all times.
Even the most powerful love spell may not fulfill the things that are required for a real relationship to be in place. Love should be natural and if your partner looses interest in you, its better that you let them follow the heart. If one door closes, expect another open infront of you.
Therefore witchcraft or love spells should not be the ultimate solution to mending a broken heart in a relationship, one has to make love exist naturally by doing the right things to your partner, the things that will recapture the inner feelings of love and affection as you did in the start of the relationship.
Only if and when all has been tried and failed to work that one should order for my love spells that actually work, and indeed this will be the last nail in the coffin to fix your troubled relationship permanently.
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Sooo I have straight hair, fine strands but quite a lot of it, never dyed, relatively healthy, length is around my ribs and I've got long layers. Nothing I do ever keeps my hair style for more than 20 minutes. I've tried loads of hairspray, tiny bit of hairspray, blowdry creams, stronghold mousse, lighthold mousse, all kinds of styling creams. Tried rollers after, cooling my hair with the dryer, etc., it makes no difference beyond maybe 5 minutes extra before it falls.
I've used curling rods, hot rollers, normal rollers, curling wands, straighteners (to curl, my hair is already pretty straight), Shark Flexstyle (beautiful for about 10 minutes), overnight curls (they work better but never look that great, it's definitely obvious they're DIY curls lol). Curling wands are probably the most effective, I'll get a few hours of waves, but the level of heat is damaging and it takes ages to do my whole head so I only do it occasionally.
I would assume it's my hair being too long but I had the same problem when I cut my hair shorter a few times over the past few years, to just below shoulder length and just above bra straps. And I have layers and face frame-y pieces and they fall just as quickly as the rest of my hair despite much being shorter.
It's not just curls either. Straighteners do very little and I look pretty much the same after. Wavy blow drys or volume styles are 100% pointless and gone before I'm finished lol. (But I'd expect that with long hair)
Why!! It's SO annoying!! Are some hair types just completely unable to hold any kind of style, or is it a skill issue on my part?

Hi everyone, posting here as i can’t post on AITA cus it mentions self harm. But maybe someone can give some perspective
I 26F had a friendship breakup after 14 years for not picking the friends side. Giving anonymous names to avoid confusion. I had two friends, we’ll call the Chloe and Ella- they both have names beginning with the same letter in reality but I get the muddled up all the time so if seperate names to stop me doing this. For context I have an issue with words getting muddled up and can legitimately be adamant that my cucumber has a virus and I eat cheese and computer sandwiches . My mum has the same problem, it’s normally a laugh. But it can mean I get people muddled up. in terms of personality I’ve been described as a hufflepuff or a cinnamon roll. I always try to do my best by people to the point I’ve ended up hospitalised for stress which has made me ill. I make care packages for my friend which they get every now and then when they feel blue and I do my best to be mindful and thoughtful of others as I keep to the rules “ if you treat someone cruelly, your not human, be honest, be kind, never harm another, protect those who need it” thsee are rules I have for myself and others , so the moment someone is cruel or does something inhumanely disrespectful, like putting someone’s safety at risk with their actions- I cut ties. This is important for the story I’m about to say.
Chloe at the time was 25 and Ella 24 , I and Chloe we were in seperate year to Ella I school but the two used to be childhood friends living on the same street, Ella is marrying into Chloe’s family via Chloe’s Cousin… who we will call Rori. Chloe would say Ella was like family, as she would with me and a few others. Both Chloe and Ella have mental health issues. Ella specifically doesn’t produce seratonin in her brain which she needs medication as it, giving her symptoms of Bipolar disorder ( she’s awaiting diagnosis) and Chloe has anxiety and anger issues along with other issues. I’ve always gotten on well generally with both in school and thought I’d gotten close to both after school even more so. However I began noticing Chloe had very little interest in initiating conversations, meeting ups and constantly ‘ forgot’ things that were important to others but not her. She would get incredibly rude and defensive over things that didnt need to be defended agains ( for example she was being loud one time and I asked her if she could lower her voice as I was on the phone and she kicked off badly). I’ve seen her shout at her step dad when he asked if she could hurry along ( not rudely I might add) and she even shouted in the middle of a restaurant to Ella on Chloe’s 18th birthday ( we live in uk and you can drink at 18) when Ella Joked the She herself was yet to be able to drink. Chloe’s behaviour has always been irrational and she’s required a lot of sugar coated conversations and In order to keep the peace I’ve had to excuse a lot of negative behaviours. if you go clothing shopping you can’t say if shes worn something that doesn’t suit her because she gets upset because she’s flat chested and very androgynous in appearance. She takes everything as an attack and whenever she has recieved criticism she ended up a state. And if I ever brought up bad behaviour she’d done she’d conveniently forget or say “ it makes me feel really bad that you’d say that, like I’m a terrible friend if you’d say a thing like that”. In fact I believe I have been gaslit by her many times, which I chalked down to her mental health. She claimed she had self harm, and whilst I have never doubted her, there has never been a mark on her body, covered or uncovered, no scars, no scratches, no bruises, burns, grazes or scalds. There’s no self neglect apart from the occasional meal skip and forgotten shower. In fact she’s obsessed with her appearance. I used to self harm and starve myself as a young child… using bruising and self hitting and Ella used to self harm with cutting and scalding. I have a friend who also has an entire arm with things carved into her arm and marks. We’re no experts and I’d never judge, but you do learn to recognise people who harm themselves. She’s always seemed to be a bit of a mystery on that front but we never mentioned it and just did our best to support her.
I have done my utmost to be supportive, i used to leave my university classes when she’d have a panic attack in her own, I used to do the care packages, I’d take her out when she was down, give her space when she needed, I even made her a book of photos and anxiety tips , I helped her move in to her apartment to escape her parents which she would say didn’t understand her and weren’t helpful, taught her how to cook bacon. I basically did everything I could to be supportive and good to her, as I do for all my friends. Unfortunately I never received the same , in fact the only time I would get messages is if she’d want something, she’d forget about plans we’d made which often meant she would invite others for the same thing and forget we were going. She would even tell mutual friends I was too busy when they said about inviting me, I felt used and neglected. And the stress landed me in hospital with polyps in my stomach which had to be removed. work Put me in therapy which helped and I realised I neeed to set boundaries to protect myself. Which I did. I got excluded by her more. On the flip side if I went to hang out with mutual friends without her she’d guilt trip me if I didn’t invite her and she pushed my boundary as far as she could. In the end I stopped hanging out with some people unless she was invited. It meant I had very little social life. But it kept the peace.
Ella was the opposite and engaged as much as she was engaged to. As I say she too had mental health issues. She particularly has been struggling the last few years……she comes from a poorer background ( Chloe does to an extent but didn’t struggle as much as Ella’s family). Ella has very rotten luck, and has family issues ranging from finding out her dad isn’t biologically her father ( her bio she calls a sperm donor and is a nasty piece of work), to her mum not having enough food to feed herself, her younger ( but two oldest out of her three brothers) are special needs with autism and adhd the 3rd and youngest who she has no blood connection to was abandoned and abused by his bio mum and fraudulently putting Ella’s dads name on bills even though they’re not together- so he gets organisations looking for money he doesn’t have… he has severe health issues meaning the youngest has been put unofficially under Ella’s mum’s care ( who is an amazingly strong woman and deserves all the best) , Ella does her best to support them but always is anxious for them. Her personality is passionate and it can sometimes land her in trouble as she can be a little sassy and quick to jump the gun. Her other stressors includes she’s stuck in a toxically managed job which has sucked the joy out of her favourite thing, marine biology. She dreamed as a child of being a shark behaviourologist and job has killed it leaving her shaken and struggling to find her feet, she is also planning her and Roris wedding, which his mother appears to be sabotaging anyw way she can with outbursts and toxic comments. She dreads going to visit them . So you can imagine Ella is strugglng with a lot of emotions simultaneously and panicking a lot. Chloe and I both know this . Her soon to be mother in law, We will call Sally ….has never liked Ella and her sister ( Chloe’s mum) are quite snarky women and have made rude or inappropriate statements which I have witnessed. Sally is also similar to Chloe in attitude And doesn’t treat her son very well, and I suspect nor does she treat Rori’ siblings and father well. When she drinks she becomes nasty also. Anyway…
Over the years when ever Sally gave Ella or Rori a hard time, Ella would share the details and her upset with me and Chloe, I would keep my mouth shut but have pointed out when I considered behaviour bitchy and when Ella said things were starting to smooth out between them I was Suspicious as hell. I have met Sally 6 times and from the first time I didn’t like how she spoke at and down to people. Chloe always gets avoidant in those conversations, no doubt avoiding making someone upset.
now to the story. A few months ago Sally told Ella that Chloe had told her she was dating a guy. In truth Chloe had been having hook ups with a couple of guys but was adamant e was not looking for a relationship. Fair enough right. At this point in time I’d just entered into a new relationship, we’ll call him Alex. Alex was part of our school group of friends and even though I wasn’t friends oer say with him, Chloe was kind of. She’d hung out a few times with him and others but would go long periods of not talking to him. Alex is amazing and it’s been over 6 months since we got together and we love each other in the cute weird couple way. A couple of years beforehand we started dating Alex had actually tried to ask Chloe out which I’d wing manned him with and was shocked to find Chloe had shot him down saying he was like a brother. Couldn’t understand why as he’s a great guy ( I’m not biased , he’s a miraculously lovely person who wears his heart on his sleeve and isn’t afraid to be honest or himself, he’s really supportive and creative). Anyway we Didn’t talk for those couple of years but all the sudden a few months ago we started chatting about comicon and getting a group together and we just started talking and having fun together, we ended up dating as a result. In truth I didn’t tell Chloe straight away, in fact she didn’t find out until after a few dates. I just wanted to avoid any questions and enjoy some alone time getting to know each other… well guess who Chloe had supposedly said to Sally she was dating And then Sally to Ella. Rori and Ella corrected Sally of course, revealing it was I who was dating him. Sally was adament on what Chloe had said and since Sally and Ella was smoothing things out … Ella panicked, and decided to ask Chloe about it. forgetting to put on the soft touch gloves that she normally would use with Chloe to avoid upset. Ella when panicked drops all small talk, talks abruptly and physically can not talk soft and fluffy when panicking. So the way she was phrasing things youd be able to tell would trigger Chloe.
Anyway Chloe denied it but Ella wasn’t sure how Sally would know Alex’s name. So she asked again. Chloe became very defensive, but did not actually address how Sally would know Alexs name. Instead she took on the approach of “ I can’t believe you’d think I’d say that” and she asked Ella why she would.
heres part of the problem. Over the last two years specifically Chloe has been saying she’s unhappy and struggling, but posting on socials that she’s going out a lot and basically portraying the opposite of what she’s telling others, she’d been sleeping around , lying about things that happened and started smoking and drinking more, had a bad habit of picking the “ bad boy” who would string her along … she appeared very self destructive. she quit her job in a small convenience store where she barely worked 3 days a week and had no realistic career plans after leaving. She thought she could go into modelling or do art, however never completed the art work she did do and didn’t do any research for modelling, whenever I found a job that was advertised in town I’d send her a snap and she’d say no thank you. And the apartment type she’s in is designed for vulner girls like addicts or abuse victims, even though at her parents house she was safe, supported and well cared for ( which naturally I can’t guarantee but what I witnessed seemed ok) She just appeared like she was making risky choices and in combination to what she was saying and what we were seeing on socials. Especially as she was avoiding and neglecting her friendships with both of us…It didn’t make sense. Well Ella brought up this to Chloe as part of her reason and that with her and Sally’s relationship going so well ishe wasn’t sure on the truth,
next thing we know Chloe has had a huge melt down over this and they argued. In the end I listened to both sides, saw the messages and put in our group chat, they were both being idiots because if they had been better at communicating and hadn’t neglected their friendships they wouldnt have argued. And it’s because they’d become so distant that Ella questioned and Chloe reacted the way she did. I got them both to apologise to each other and we thought that was other, apparently not.
apparently Chloe had a physical melt down about it while she was with her mother… who then proceeded to send a really rude message to Ella , speaking down at her like a child. Ella simply said that Chloe is the one who should be talking to her, not her mother. As the argument had been resolved she was acting unnecessarily. This actually angered Ella and she went back to Chloe saying her mother needed to back off, argument number two happening. Ella believed that Chloe should have just discussed things further is she wasn’t happy after the apology. Chloe believed her mother could say what she wanted as she was defending Chloe, and Ella was saying that her mother shouldn’t have been involved and the fact she thought it was ok for her to jump in after a resolution has been made was not ok. Chloe then proceeded to avoid messaging her. Which is something Chloe does when she’s had an argument, she basically mutes the conversation and goes off grid for a couple of weeks before expecting an apology. and I have even heard her say “ —— with come crawling back and when they do I’m gonna give em hell” personally I think this is a rather childish response but didn’t say that. I tried to stay as neutral as possible .Instead I tried to encourage her to talk to Ella, and vice versa. I got them to start a little bit but Chloe kept dismissing Ella’s view and feelings, blaming her and basically acted like Ella never even apologised . Ella even skived off work to come down to visit our area to work things out but Chloe bailed stating she didn’t “ feel safe” ,which seemed a bit extreme to me to say about someone you'd been friends with for 15 years and had only expressed concern for your wellbeing and huge support. I had even suggested using my house as the middle ground but after hearing her attitude about the situation realised it wouldn’t improve anything. So cancelled it because I thought heyd both just argue again. I tried to explain to both of them how their feelings were to the other and get them to see each others viewpoint. Ella saw Chloe’s view and had apologised multiple times but Chloe was refusing to even acknowledge hers, saying she felt attacked- repeatedly. She never clarified on what specifically she felt attacked by… and she was really avoiding talking things out , she even muted me and group chats we we’re all apart of As she had even been rude with me and was insist that Ella should be apologising still. She really did not seem to understand that Ella had apologised and it was wrong for her mother to stir things up again and that all she needed to have said instead of getting defensive was that her mother shouldn’t have said anything.
Ella was in bits about the argument, her anxiety went through the roof. She started panicking saying what if Chloe stopped being friends, what if she didn’t come to her wedding, she asked me if I’d go back to being the maid of honour for her ( she’d asked me when she got engaged and I said it would upset Chloe if she didn’t ask her so I relinquished it for Chloe) … basically she spiralled into negative thoughts and cried every night…After nearly 10 days of Chloe avoiding both of us and Ella becoming so stressed she lost her two years self harm sobriety I became frustrated and stopped sugar coating things and said to Chloe her avoiding the situation was making things worse and it wasn’t fair to string Ella along as she was panicking so much she kept thinking about if she needed to make rash decisions. Chloe was essentially punishing her, Sally was also getting involved and her true colours popped out again, Chloe’s mother was stirring Chloe up and I believe Chloe’s “ newer” friends ( she befriended a bunch of younger adults, some i Believe we’re still in school- they seem vulnerable ). I was met with aggressive defensive behaviour and she wouldn’t acknowledge any other view apart from her own. I was accused of attacking her whch I wasn’t and I’d even apologised if I’d upset her. She continued to avoid me and muted again. She decided going out to a club with her newer friends to get drunk and party was more important then resolving her argument with someone she would say was like a sister to her. She also actually said “ I didn’t want to because I was hanging out with ——- and didn’t want to be in a bad mood all “ I was genuinely baffled by the attirude and unwillingness to just listen and work things out. She said the whole situation was ridiculous and shouldn’t of happened, but was refusing to stop it from continuing. she Even accused us of not being supportive of this “ new me” she was becoming and that we were the only two to have a problem. Bare in mind out of all our mutual older friends, they agreed she was over reacting and it was only her newer younger friends that didn’t know her very well who were “ being supportive” some of her older friends are also her x friends because they had arguments with her where they disagreed with her actions and she ditched them.
Anyway … again… sorry it’s so long…Ella then decided for her own wellbeing to set a… I suppose a time limit, you see when they first argued we were 3 weeks away from seeing an Ashniko concert together- the 3 of us. Ella basically said to me she was going to wait so many days and if Chloe hadn’t come forward to work it out she would regretfully message us both about the concert. She was thinking about cancelling all the tickets as she didn’t want to feel used for the tickets if Chloe suddenly wanted to talk it out just to go to the concert. She was mentally and physically exhausted from stress.
now it was my Time to panic, so I hurriedly messaged Chloe saying the time to fix things was over a week ago, if she didn’t message soon there’s was a chance non of us would be going to the concert , or Ella wouldn’t go, so shed need to look at putting money aside as a back up in case a hotel and transport was needed ( at the beginning of the argument I’d said I’d be going to this concert no matter what) .id got money just in case but Chloe has a habit of trying to get others to pay for her so my line of thinking was to avoid getting stung with the bill. Anyway Chloe took my message as an assault, caused us of kicking her out the concert, blamed Ella some more, made out I was picking sides because I didn’t agree with her mothers actions ( I told them I understood them but didn’t think they should of happened) either and basically dismissed the fact that she dragged everything out which has made things worse. I don’t think she understood or cared that Ella had lost her self harm sobriety over this and she just took the stance that it was all on her and also I was being just as rude and disrespectful ( I wasn’t being rude, I just stopped talking to her like it wasn’t her responsibility to work things out too and didn’t agree with everything that she said or put the blame on just one person- I chalked it all up to bad communication) anyway I told her. That avoiding everything hasn’t made it better. She said “ I think we should stop talking before we say something we might regret” she was the only one being aggressive in her messaging and I really didn’t understand her reaction or why she was saying as everything she was saying was so incorrect and twisted to what she’d actually been told. I Told Ella what happened as I had a sense of forboding and apologised profusely which Ella assured me wasn’t my fault and that she was being unreasonable.
I also messaged one of her newer friends that I’d slowly become friends with. Granted that I shouldn’t have but I said I was worried about her, that our mutual friend didn’t know if she wanted to remain friends, I didn’t think we’d be friends longer, and since I’d talked about going to the cinema with this friend I’d offered to remain friends no matter what happened,
a few hours later I received a message from both, him saying no thanks Tata etc and a long paragraph from Chloe with her accusing me of being disrespectful, that my attitude crossed a line ( to my knowledge the only attitude has been her own) , she accused both of us for making A decision - which I suspect her friend showed the paragraph I’d sent him Basically admitting we weren’t sure we’d be friends etc and twisted that into a decision…that we could keep her concert ticket as she didn’t want it , she said I’d put a childish post about her up on social media ( I had posted a poem I’d written in school about my parents when they used to argue and I had put a post that could only been seen by her and Ella up saying it was heartbreaking when you could see something about to happen- mistake I know but by this point I was expressing my feelings on the matter which was sadness) I used to use my social media as a diary in school so it wasn’t uncommon to find stuff written By me- usually in the form of poetry or monologues etc… she’d posted a tik tok where she looked smug in the camera and lyrics which seemed to address the situation. Atleast my post was my feelings and not disrespectful…anyway she also said I had disrespected her mother etc. basically it wa as big F U I’m out paragrap and seconds after she blocked us so we couldn’t respond. She then proceeded to block us off every social media she could find. I was baffled, hurt and angry but also there was an enormous wave of relief that I was surprised by. And I was on the phone to Alex that night and I actually said that to him …
Chloe did miss one of my TikTok accounts and instagram, which I did manage to squeeze a short response via instagram messaging explaining she had twisted everything and when she realised the truth we’d be gone as she’d been a terrible friend to us for years. I then blocked her. I know I shouldn’t have sent the message but after years of being Treated so poorly by her - 14 years of her being neglectful, agressive, unnecessarily defensive, lying, constantly making me feel like I wasn’t a good enough friend to her for her to say the things she did, just because I didn’t agree with her view entirely and that her actions were wrong. It struck a nerve,Ella was equally as hurt and angry, as she had really tried to work things out and although hadn’t been treated as badly as me, had still been neglected for several years by Chloe… we feel like dropped toys. I couldn’t stop apologising to Ella but she simply said it wasn’t on me.
Over the next couple of weeks Sally and Ella still converse. With Ella’s mental health fried to a crisp she let slip a few things to Sally. Chloe also did the same, however I only spoke to Alex or Ella, with a witness in the room. I received through Sally, using Ella as a messenger. Accusations that I had apparently accused Chloe of stealing from my business ( I hosted a stall at Comicon which op she offered to help at Whilst I was worried about theft in general and had £200 of stock missing with no money for, I never blamed Chloe and put it down to people walking past my table swiping things, Chloe is terrible at maths but for the most part I handled the money, all she was asked is if she saw anyone acting suspicious) initially I never thought she had, there was evidence she hadn’t , but the accusation of me causing her… was suspicious. I didn’t investigate however to protect my business I blocked her off my businesses social account of Facebook. Ella also cleared up things with Sally on what Chloe had said. There was also the accusation that I’d said she was jealous of me. Never said that however at this same Comicon, my boyfriend came to support and was being very affectionate and she got upset and expressed she wanted that for herself, I tried to comfort her and said it was natural to feel like she wanted affection and romance , especially after being strung along by other boys in the past. She herself has made the comment “ or jealous” she’d had a similar conversation with Alex himself and he tried to comfort in an appropriate way. i shrugged of these accusations as I’d already heard she was telling people lots of things to get sympathy and I was so tired I didn’t want to handle anything to do with her. A couple of others admitted that she tried to make things about her which Alex confirmed as he went to visit to test the waters after the argument to see where they stood as friends. Apparently she felt it was all our fault and that we should be apologising, near begging forgiveness.
just before new year is when the real doozy happened. Now for context. Now just when I had started dating Alex I had told all my gal pals I was looking for lingerie , I’d specifically told Ella over messages I was looking for it in Alex’s favourite colour and at a group Halloween mini golf night out I’d shown Chloe a set in Alex’s favourite colour. I was wearing it and basically flashed It a bit. Lo and behold days within Chloe and Ella had epargument number 1 … she showed me a bra in that colour saying she wanted to try something new. I played it cool but it screamed cringe to me. After the argument I mentioned it to Alex, with the word I only said was that I felt it was Odd, which Alex agreed. i also at a later date mentioned to Ella the conversation I’d had with Alex about it and that I said it was odd because I honestly thought I’d told Chloe about the colour being Alex’s favourite colour.
now as I said Ella had been talking to Sally. I’m not sure what was said but Chloe some how heard something about it. And she sent the most outrageous message to Alex that was “ addressing ” this accusation I’d apparently made about her and I going to a lingerie shop and her telling me his favourite colour, then buying lingerie for herself in the same colour” she wrote points saying she wouldn’t talk to him about her underwear etc and why would she do that and that I was lying about her. Alex basically said something about what did she want him to do about it and basically said I’d talk to her to address it. She basicalky said no way blocked on everything. Almost proudly in tone, and that she didn’t want to talk things through and even though she was owed an apology she didn’t want it now ( i wasn’t sure what she wanted an apology for as she’d already received an appology whenever I felt i wrote something bit harshly I would say it- I’ve recently found out what I consider harsh is a normal conversation). Alex was really frustrated and said I was trying to make it right. Not sure about the rest of the conversation but I’ve always said to him it’s his friendship I won’t interfere and he was no way obligated to share anything if he didn’t want to. He was confused that she would call him like a brother as she doesn’t act like he is, in fact she avoided him too friendship wise just like me and Ella. She didn’t even say get well soon when he or Ella was in hospital. Just focussed on her. He was so mad by her message but he’d also had a few drinks by then so I told him it was his choice whatever he did and I would love and support him either way. I felt so bad for him and cuddled him as the new year started and he decided this was her last chance as all throughout me trying to negotiate I’d showed him the messages and he’d seen me getting upset and frustrated and knew I was only trying to help. I sent one last text to her addressing the accusations. I sternly put I wanted nothing to do with her and she should go live her life as I wanted nothing to do with her ever again. He hasn’t to my knowledge been messaged by her since and I warned Ella not to share anything to Sally.
its been almost 5 months since then, me and Alex are going strong. It turns out the people Chloe used to say I was too busy for meeting up with are more then happy to see me and I’ve been going out more, I go to concerts with Alex and support his band in competitions. I’m making friends with his friendship group and his cat. The friends I made at uni and outside of Chloe and Ella are all supportive and I have more time and social energy for them now I’m not having Chloe in my life. Still I hope she’s somewhat ok, maybe with a dash of life lessons mixed in. Is that bad?
Ella is still stressed but has learnt that true supportive friends have been with her all along. She’s on stress leave from work and is searching for a not so toxic job. Rori is has said his mother has to behave at the wedding or be remoevd. Chloe and her immediate family are not longer part of the wedding party. I gave in to Ella’s request to return me to maid of honour, I have a club booked and goth decorations for her Bat-chellorette. The location is going to be a secret until 48 hours before to avoid unwanted guests, but we will be in the vip section. I’ve got biodegradable confetti made for the wedding for her, all the bridesmaids aree sorted for dresses and shoes, im picking up her bridal jacket for her in a couple of weeks ( the bridal shop accidentally ordered the wrong colour so bit of a panic) I booked the week off prior to her wedding for any panicking bride feelings and wedding needs. I’ve also been asked to be prepared to do a back up speech in case the best man gets stage fright. And so far there’s not been any news on Chloe. my main concern is Sally starting something at the wedding or Chloe revealing something about Ella’s wedding dress that was being kept as a surprise for Rori. She’s also checked in with Rori who has been really torn about things and considering she used to say they were like twin siblings, she’s not acted like it.
We’ve also had a few comments come through from Mutual friends . Apparently she said to one good luck to Alex for putting up with my BS… im not even going to respond on that. Alex is pretty happy with me and we tried to avoid Chloe as a topic unless it’s unavoidable . The tik tok account she forgot to block gets her videos come through. I forgot about the account until a month ago and was scrolling through my FYP and she popped up…They seem self destructive and in denial of what’s happened. But it’s not my concern now. I don’t need to stress about her any more So why have the temptation.I closed that account as I don’t use it and there’s some really bad videography work in them- proper cringe… so after posting one last video where I put I was saying goodbye to the account and those cringey videos . I put “ in order to move on from the past, you need to make it unimportant” … I also may have did some silly sweary motions with my hands to say goodbye to the old videos and account, which is she somehow sees think it’s for her… but as I say you have got to make the past unimportant to move on and I have A new tiktok for my business to post thing on. I’ve not seen her about town either but I’ve heard from one of Ella’s friends that Chloe conveniently shows up to where Ella’s friend is if she post anything on social media about it; bit odd. Alex takes me to bar twice a week which Chloe isn't normally seen at , as I say I’ve been making new friends, there’s a girl with rainbow hair and dresses harajuku that seems nice 🥰
I’m not sure if this is my fault, I tried to be supportive and fair to both, but I feel like I was forced into an awkward position by Chloe when she put Ella at risk physically. there’s only so much support you can give without giving yourself and I was still in recovery from my polyp removal as this happened. I feel depressed some days thinking about this situation and blame myself as well as feel angry at Chloe, I’ve stress ground my teeth in my sleep and although I feel calmer day to day over normal things. And I’m getting more socialised and loving relationships…I feel like I’m losing motivation and dipping into my old self harm habbits…. So am I to blame? And also how can I be better Supportive to Ella now she’s off the sobriety wagon

Introduced new campaign - DCS: Mi-24P Outpost Campaign by Stone Sky.

DCS World

• CTD with new Oculus/Meta Quest 2/3 v63 software - fixed.
• NEW: Added over-pressure shockwave influence from bombs, missiles, shells and gunfire on terrain vegetation like trees, bushes, and grass.
• FIXED - Linked Zone doesn't work with player-controlled units in Mission Editor.
• ChinaAssetPack. Fixed HQ-7 AI launcher missile guidance issue (better hit rate).
• ChinaAssetPack. Changed HQ-7 EO drivable version back to tracking radar version
• Voice chat:
  
  • Added a separate input layer for each FC3 aircraft.
  • Added the Forced PTT mode for intercom.
  • Fixed. FM range is missing R-862 radio.
  • Fixed. The frequency range of P-832M.
• Weapons. Chaffs do not affect some radar-guided SAMs missiles - fixed.
  
• AI aircraft. Tanker hose-cone is in retracted state when refuelling - fixed.
  
• Update default trimmer sounds in accordance with new references.
  
• AI aircraft. Helicopter with certain main rotor damage makes its crew heads bounce as if head-bangers - fixed.
  
• ME. Crash when deleting text from editor text field in some cases - fixed.
  
• GUI. When the user edit the joystick name and pressing (as suggested by tooltip), OPTIONS window closes - fixed.
  
• Weapons. AGM-65E2\L still hits the target after the laser designator turns off - fixed.
  
• ME. Freeze at Sim Poststart when using 'Show Hidden Units' - fixed.
  
• MP. When started after a DCS client, a local dedicated server "steals" Force Feedback from the DCS client - fixed.
  
• MP. JTAC laser code setting is transferred to another mission - fixed.
  
• AI surface. Some ships prevent Fog of War unfogging when they are more or less distant from the enemy targets - fixed.
  
• AI surface. Ground units don't work if the mission has an intro - fixed.
  
• AI surface. Some units always face north - fixed.
  
• Airborne troops. Crash when requesting to disembark - fixed.
  
• AI surface. Added new sound for M-60, BMD-1 and BTR-D.
  
• 3D Models. Fixed models (SA-10) S-300.
  
• GUI. CTD when trying to play Ogg Theora video tutorials - fixed.
  
• SNS devices. Digital map floating after initialization when an aircraft spawns airborne - fixed.
  

DCS: F-16C Viper by Eagle Dynamics

• G effect improvements. Loss of color, tunnel vision, and black out have been adjusted and all happen over a greater time period. This is most useful AFTER performing a G warmup (4 to 5 G for 90-degrees, and then the same manoeuvre back in the other direction). At 9.3 G and after a G warmup, blackout now occurs at approximately 30 seconds instead of 9.5 seconds. - work in progress. Sound effects will be done later.
• Added embedded INS+GPS logic based on Kalman filter. - work in progress.
• Fixed: “Knife Edge Pass” review FCS logic.
• Fixed: TGT-TO-VRP (CCRP) crash when activating it.
• Fixed: CTD when switching FCR mode in OVERRIDE.
• Fixed: Datalink with human players not working if GPS is unavailable.
• Fixed: Datalink doesn't work for maps in the Western hemisphere.
• Fixed: Multiplayer datalink share of detected air targets.
• Fixed: VSR gets stuck in EXP when switching to VSR in EXP.
• Fixed: FCR auto-display range is not working with a SAM designated target.
• Fixed: VSR Scan limits not possible to slew.
• Fixed: TGP line-of-sight oscillations and freezing.
• Fixed: Commanding area or point track with TGP in STBY moves SPI to behind aircraft.
• Fixed: FPS drop with JDAM.
• Fixed: Maverick ripple lock loss.
• Fixed: MAV TD BOX drift.
• Fixed: Inboard HARMs jettisoned inhibit outboard HARMs from designation.
• Fixed: HSD Expand can cause some symbology to disappear.
• Fixed: MSL/DGFT/AA mode OSB 9..
• Fixed: Sensors do not follow steerpoint after AGM-65 EO-VIS usage.
• Fixed: WCMD loss of TUI after bomb release on HUD.
• Fixed: HTS major and minor axis data becomes unstable in some situations.
• Fixed: Engine nozzle feathers graphical error.
• Fixed: Jamming SURV effect improvements.
• Fixed: Display behaviour for AGM-65 LOS Circle "in range" box is inconsistent.
• Fixed: Cockpit seems to have two reflections.
• Fixed: IAM missed by the amount of drift.
• Fixed: GMT TMS Up while tracking moving ground targets causes target info and background map to disappear.
• Fixed: AGM-65 setting SOI to WPN before designating in EO-VIS moves designation to 0,0 coordinates.
• Fixed: GBU-24 symbology jumping around and erratic when on ground.
• Fixed: Cursor zero ignores newly set Mark Point if using DTOS.
• Fixed: F-16 Switching from TWS to RWS while in STT drops track briefly.
• Fixed: Visual issue with F-16 HUD glass edge.

DCS: F/A-18C by Eagle Dynamics

• Fixed: BRA on RDR ATTK page does not use MAG, using TRUE heading incorrectly.
• Fixed: AACQ and Bullseye information is overlapping - Bullseye symbol overlapping.
• Fixed: High drag bomb release error in Free Fall (FF) mode.
• Fixed: RAID mode can be "pre-activated" prior to entering TWS.
• Disabled Game Flight Mode.
• Fixed: ASI command makes a little overcompensation command - Pitch down tendency.
• Fixed: Check stab command NU at landing flare touch down.
• Fixed: TDC in RDR ATTK and AZ/EL does not show info for trackfiles in memory, when in STT.
• Fixed: Check trim advisory not showing.
• Fixed: Steerpoint TPOD misalignment/drift.
• Fixed: ACM Slew and NO RAD indication under specific flow.

DCS: A-10C II Tank Killer by Eagle Dynamics

• Fixed. Altimeter is missing a decimal separator for pressure setting.

DCS: AH-64D by Eagle Dynamics

• Game Flight Mode disabled.
• Fixed: CTD on turning on AH-64D TADS.
• George AI tuning.

NOTE: In the next update, we plan to add LINK, ZOOM, and C-Scope functions.

DCS: Mi-24P Hind by Eagle Dynamics

• Added: Bind for radar altimeter dangerous altitude setting
• Fixed: While “Hydro Lock” option activated , moving collective without hydro release pressed still affects avionics but not FM

DCS: P-47D Thunderbolt by Eagle Dynamics

• Fixed. P-47D-40 bugged gunsight external texture
• Fixed. hydraulics drives fail to extend undercarriage after repair
• Added. New landing gear physics

DCS: P-51D Mustang by Eagle Dynamics

• Added. New landing gear physics (including TF-51D)

DCS: Spitfire LF Mk. IX by Eagle Dynamics

• Cockpit reflection tuned

DCS: Supercarrier by Eagle Dynamics

• Fixed: Deck crew LODs have spikes
• Fixed: Supercarrier ATC radio menu is broken during takeoff from the catapult
• Fixed: Radio menu may break after repeated landing request in some case

DCS: Mirage F1 by Aerges

General:

• Rear pilot is now not present in the Mission Editor preview window (basically in payload dialog) when the 'Solo Flight' option is selected.
• The rear pilot is now not present in a human-controlled Mirage F1 BE, once in the mission, when the 'Solo Flight' option is enabled.
• Adjusted appearance of the aircraft mission options dialog.
• Now with the 'Disable force feedback effects' option checked, force feedback joysticks (if any is connected) will always return a constant spring force. All FFB shake effects will be disabled as well.
• Now with the 'Disable force feedback effects' option checked, 'Force Feedback' section in the Special Options dialog is inactive.

Radar:

• Implemented radar 'Standby' mode.
• Implemented radar power up sequence: Display is available at the 31st second after radar power up (PNE light goes out at the 35th second), and transmitter is ready after 3 minutes timeout (EMI light will cease at this moment).
• Added power up logic for the radar “AP” (parametric amplifier) light.
• Fixed dedicated 1st and 2nd stage commands of the radar antenna elevation buttons behaviour when 2nd stage is released with 1st stage still being held pressed.
• The radar resulting antenna altitude difference now can't be more than +/-48000 ft in both 'E' and 'D' elevation control modes.

Systems:

• Fixed clickability issues (shifted clickspots) with the lights panel at the right side of the Optical Sight ( 'C + M or SW' and 'Jammer Detection' lights).
• Fixed AoA light strip not illuminating in Mirage F1 BE rear cockpit.
• Fixed combat flaps logic not working in Mirage F1 BE.
• Fixed Optical Sight test symbology appearance:

1. 'Approach' test mode is now enabled for testing only when none of the weapon modes were selected.
2. Attitude scale now displays -60 deg of pitch and 180 deg of bank in normal scale display mode, and -40 mil of pitch and 180 deg of bank in simplified scale display mode.
3. Gun firing reticle now has 40 mil diameter in all test modes.
4. Adjusted the following symbols positions in various test modes: target symbol, gun firing reticle, radar command reticle.

• IFF will start in N when the aircraft is initialised hot on the ground.
• Fixed brightness adjustment of IFF lights.
• Default mode 2 IFF code is now 2000.
• Added magnetic indicator logic in the Mode 4 IFF panel.
• Fixed launch problems created by a mixed F1 and F4 rocket payload.

Flight Model:

• Added vibrations with airbrake deployment at high Mach.
• Fixed a small bug in airbrake pitching moment tables.

Communications:

• Added 'Engage Ships' radio command.
• Added 'Engage with' radio submenu.
• Added F1 TRAP 136 and TRAP 137B radios presets for Voice Chat.
• Changed TRAP 136 V/UHF radio guard frequency to the standard one: 243 MHz.
• Voice Chat intercom does not operate anymore when electric power is unavailable.

3D model and textures:

• Added cryptographic computer unit texture.

Miscellaneous:

• Updated Flight Manual. Mainly IFF description, including mode 4, and Controls Window description.

DCS: C-101 Aviojet by AvioDev

General:

• Rear pilot is now not present in the Mission Editor preview window (basically in payload dialog) when the 'Solo Flight' option is selected.
• 'Solo Flight' is now available for AI-controlled aircraft.
• Fixed C-101EB 'English' cockpit livery not being applied.
• Now with the 'Disable force feedback effects' option checked, force feedback joysticks (if any is connected) will always return a constant spring force. All FFB shake effects will be disabled as well.

Communications:

• Added Voice Chat sound filters parameters for ARC-134, V/TVU-740, and VHF-20B radios presets.

DCS: JF-17 by Deka Ironwork Simulations

• New: inSky SATAC 2022 Champion skin
• New: draw two airspace on HSD (A: purple and B: cyan)
  
  • MISSION (default): Added by mission maker using draw->line->segments
    • Blue: BKYA and BKYB
    • Red: RKYA and RKYB
    • Neutral: NKYA and NKYB
  • F10 Label: Added by player on F10 using label
    • JKYA1~JKYA10 and JKYB1~JKYB10
    • Always closed polygon
  • Preset: Added by preset lua
    • Each terrain has its own airspace lua
    • Lua sample can be found in JF-17/Doc directory
    • Lua (file) can be edited (replaced) during (MP) mission for quick update
    • In MP, each flight/squadron can use its own lua (convenient distribution)
    • Help keep F10 map clean
  • Clean: remove airspace from HSD
  • Note:
    • You can select airspace source in configuration panel then update DTC
    • Each draw no more than 10 line segments
• Fixed: unstoppable refocus of WMD7 camera
  
• Fixed: WMD7 laser cannot be repaired after run out of life
  
• Adjusted: WMD7 CCD image source (better CCD grey image)
  
• Adjusted: install/remove ladder and inlet cover via config panel
  
• Adjusted: switched to ED’s GB-6 and LS-6
  

DCS: Black Shark 3 by Eagle Dynamics

• Fixed Ka-50 old QS Syria missions corrupted start position
• Incorrect audio/subtitle warning given for INU Fixpoint within 18km - fixed

DCS: F-14 Tomcat by Heatblur Simulations

• Fixed minor vertex normal issues on left engine nacelle (A)
• Slightly improved rendering performance by merging some indicator elements.
• Fixed various minor issues in LoD 1-3.

DCS: Flaming Cliffs by Eagle Dynamics

• A-10A. Panel lights texture issue (border) - fixed
• A-10A. Cockpit model adjustments
• Su-33. Reflections can be too strong at odd times on gauges - fixed
• Su-25T. Kh-58 missile collide with plane during launch with big sideslip angle - fixed
• A-10A. HSI and ILS are not working - fixed
• Su-25A. CCRP ripple release mode does not work with MBD2-67 - fixed
• Su-27. MFD placed in wrong place in HUD view mode - fixed

DCS: L-39 Albatros by Eagle Dynamics

• Added Marianas Instant Action missions

DCS: Mi-8MTV2 by Eagle Dynamics

• Cockpit reflections tuned

DCS: Yak-52 by Eagle Dynamics

• FIXED: Reflections too strong under flashlight

DCS: Combined Arms by Eagle Dynamics

• Fixed player-JTAC operation in MP.

DCS: NS430 by Eagle Dynamics

• Fixed. Terrain mode memory leak leads to CTD
• Fixed. Options menus have truncated labels
• Fixed. Wrong indicated ground speed
• Fixed. HFOM and VFOM statuses on GPS page won't fit into its fields
• Fixed. Crash that happens during zooming in and out on the Persian Gulf map

Campaigns

DCS: A-10C Operation Agile Spear Campaign by Combat King Simulations Campaign was updated to version 2.3

• All Missions - Top down review and many bugs squashed big and small. Many thanks to Pyrocumulous! His help was instrumental.
• All missions - radio frequencies better coordinated for all aircraft in the strike package
• All missions - updated Datalink connections for all like aircraft.
• All missions - changed all displayed messages to Clearview
• All missions - updated to new F10 menu system which adds new options for the player to manage thier simulation's environment. Thanks Gareth Magnall https://www.youtube.com/@Pukin-Dog
• All missions - Wingmen (Pig-2, 3 & 4) changed over to a seperate group for more tasking flexibility. Thanks B.D.
• All missions - added the option of a Practice Sortie to each mission. This will allow the mission pilot to exit the primary mission, fly a practice sortie with the same loadout as the primary mission, and then reenter the primary mission. The mission pilot can fly and practice any technique/profile, rearm and refuel as desired, and then re-enter the primary mission when ready.
• All missions - now have the ability to accelerate time (fast forward between waypoints) without missing any mission critical inputs or messages. Thanks Sedlo.
• All missions - datacards use different font/colors for easier reading.
• All missions - end of mission music added.

DCS: F/A-18C Flaming Sunrise Campaign by Sandman Simulations

• All missions – Air defense visibility adjusted to get AI SEAD flights attack higher priority targets over Rapiers and AAA

DCS: F/A-18C Inherent Resolve Campaign by Looking Glass

• Updated mission 13

DCS: F-14A Fear the Bones Campaign by Reflected Simulations

• Su-25T was removed from modules list

DCS: F/A-18C Inherent Resolve Campaign by Looking Glass

• Added campfire to mission 1 to assist in location of enemy training camp

P-51D: The Blue Nosed Bastards of Bodney Campaign by Reflected Simulations

• ATC frequencies changed and corrected

Spitfire IX The Big Show Campaign by Reflected Simulations

• Complete revamp of the campaign to version 2.0
• Every mission uses historical locations now
• Mission historical inconsistencies fixed
• Mission timings adjusted based on further research
• Smoothened triggers
• More voice overs and sound effects added
• Reworked kneeboards and briefing visuals
• Corrected mission timings
• ATC frequencies changed and corrected yet again.

DCS: P-51D Debden Eagles Campaign by Reflected Simulations

• ATC frequencies changed and corrected yet again.
• All takeoff sequences were reworked

DCS: Fw 190 A-8 Horrido! Campaign by Reflected Simulations

• More damage fail safes added to mission 12

Bf 109 K-4 Jagdflieger Campaign by Reflected Simulations

• ATC frequencies changed and corrected

DCS: P-47D Wolfpack Campaign by Reflected Simulations

• Mission 12 - flight has no bombs - fixed

A-10C / A-10C II Basic Flight Training Qualification Campaigns by Maple Flag Missions

• Corrected CMSP Switch Trigger Test for both A-10C and A-10C II BFT01 missions.

DCS: UH-1H Worlds Apart - Spring 2025 Campaign

• Mission 1 - In some cases, AI does not trigger when landing at station 1. The trigger has been adjusted and the take-off can be forced as a solution via the F-10 radio menu.

DCS: Raven One Dominant Fury Campaign
Mission 2:

• fixed issue where mission would not progress after reporting seeing the yacht
• complete mission update to match new radio system
• F10 radio menu and space bar now can be replaced by HOTAS switches for better immersion
• added Link4 and ACLS to the carrier

Mission 9:

• fixed issue with Texaco 21 refuelling of Texaco 11
• fixed issue with SCUDs not firing and breaking the mission
• complete mission update to match new radio system
• F10 radio menu and space bar now can be replaced by HOTAS switches for better immersion
• added Link4 and ACLS to the carrier
• added working TACAN to all flight members

F/A-18C Serpent’s Head 2 Campaign by Badger633

• Missions 1: Fail on entering display fixed.
• Missions 3,5, 8 and 10: EZ refuel versions Fords fuel mass reduced

F/A-18C Rise of the Persian Lion by Badger633

• Mission 6: IR shield removed from enemy Helos.
• Mission 7: Convoy blocking itself and not moving fixed.
• Missions 4 to 9 and 13: EZ refuel versions Fords fuel mass reduced.

F/A-18C Rise of the Persian Lion 2 by Badger633

• Mission 6: F18 not exploding fixed.
• Mission 4,6,8,9a,9a and 12: EZ refuel versions Fords fuel mass reduced.
• Mission 12: Bugged moving rectangular zone fixed.

Known issues:

• Propeller and Jet wash effect on nearby vegetation environment was added but not finished yet WIP
• F-16C - Flight Alignment procedure still requires some tuning, coming in a future update. In-Flight Alignment in pre-GPS era requires additional couple of FIXes in addition to the first two OFLY FIX to calculate the velocity properly. These FIXes can be made in any suitable mode: TPOD, FCR, HUD, OFLY, the only requirement is to keep the aircraft at a straight line between the fixes. Of course, the fixes should be done precisely.

Introduced new campaign - DCS: Mi-24P Outpost Campaign by Stone Sky.

DCS World

• CTD with new Oculus/Meta Quest 2/3 v63 software - fixed.
• NEW: Added over-pressure shockwave influence from bombs, missiles, shells and gunfire on terrain vegetation like trees, bushes, and grass.
• FIXED - Linked Zone doesn't work with player-controlled units in Mission Editor.
• ChinaAssetPack. Fixed HQ-7 AI launcher missile guidance issue (better hit rate).
• ChinaAssetPack. Changed HQ-7 EO drivable version back to tracking radar version
• Voice chat:
  • Added a separate input layer for each FC3 aircraft.
  • Added the Forced PTT mode for intercom.
  • Fixed. FM range is missing R-862 radio.
  • Fixed. The frequency range of P-832M.
• Weapons. Chaffs do not affect some radar-guided SAMs missiles - fixed.
• AI aircraft. Tanker hose-cone is in retracted state when refuelling - fixed.
• Update default trimmer sounds in accordance with new references.
• AI aircraft. Helicopter with certain main rotor damage makes its crew heads bounce as if head-bangers - fixed.
• ME. Crash when deleting text from editor text field in some cases - fixed.
• GUI. When the user edit the joystick name and pressing (as suggested by tooltip), OPTIONS window closes - fixed.
• Weapons. AGM-65E2\L still hits the target after the laser designator turns off - fixed.
• ME. Freeze at Sim Poststart when using 'Show Hidden Units' - fixed.
• MP. When started after a DCS client, a local dedicated server "steals" Force Feedback from the DCS client - fixed.
• MP. JTAC laser code setting is transferred to another mission - fixed.
• AI surface. Some ships prevent Fog of War unfogging when they are more or less distant from the enemy targets - fixed.
• AI surface. Ground units don't work if the mission has an intro - fixed.
• AI surface. Some units always face north - fixed.
• Airborne troops. Crash when requesting to disembark - fixed.
• AI surface. Added new sound for M-60, BMD-1 and BTR-D.
• 3D Models. Fixed models (SA-10) S-300.
• GUI. CTD when trying to play Ogg Theora video tutorials - fixed.
• SNS devices. Digital map floating after initialization when an aircraft spawns airborne - fixed.

DCS: F-16C Viper by Eagle Dynamics

• G effect improvements. Loss of color, tunnel vision, and black out have been adjusted and all happen over a greater time period. This is most useful AFTER performing a G warmup (4 to 5 G for 90-degrees, and then the same manoeuvre back in the other direction). At 9.3 G and after a G warmup, blackout now occurs at approximately 30 seconds instead of 9.5 seconds. - work in progress. Sound effects will be done later.
• Added embedded INS+GPS logic based on Kalman filter. - work in progress.
• Fixed: “Knife Edge Pass” review FCS logic.
• Fixed: TGT-TO-VRP (CCRP) crash when activating it.
• Fixed: CTD when switching FCR mode in OVERRIDE.
• Fixed: Datalink with human players not working if GPS is unavailable.
• Fixed: Datalink doesn't work for maps in the Western hemisphere.
• Fixed: Multiplayer datalink share of detected air targets.
• Fixed: VSR gets stuck in EXP when switching to VSR in EXP.
• Fixed: FCR auto-display range is not working with a SAM designated target.
• Fixed: VSR Scan limits not possible to slew.
• Fixed: TGP line-of-sight oscillations and freezing.
• Fixed: Commanding area or point track with TGP in STBY moves SPI to behind aircraft.
• Fixed: FPS drop with JDAM.
• Fixed: Maverick ripple lock loss.
• Fixed: MAV TD BOX drift.
• Fixed: Inboard HARMs jettisoned inhibit outboard HARMs from designation.
• Fixed: HSD Expand can cause some symbology to disappear.
• Fixed: MSL/DGFT/AA mode OSB 9..
• Fixed: Sensors do not follow steerpoint after AGM-65 EO-VIS usage.
• Fixed: WCMD loss of TUI after bomb release on HUD.
• Fixed: HTS major and minor axis data becomes unstable in some situations.
• Fixed: Engine nozzle feathers graphical error.
• Fixed: Jamming SURV effect improvements.
• Fixed: Display behaviour for AGM-65 LOS Circle "in range" box is inconsistent.
• Fixed: Cockpit seems to have two reflections.
• Fixed: IAM missed by the amount of drift.
• Fixed: GMT TMS Up while tracking moving ground targets causes target info and background map to disappear.
• Fixed: AGM-65 setting SOI to WPN before designating in EO-VIS moves designation to 0,0 coordinates.
• Fixed: GBU-24 symbology jumping around and erratic when on ground.
• Fixed: Cursor zero ignores newly set Mark Point if using DTOS.
• Fixed: F-16 Switching from TWS to RWS while in STT drops track briefly.
• Fixed: Visual issue with F-16 HUD glass edge.

DCS: F/A-18C by Eagle Dynamics

• Fixed: BRA on RDR ATTK page does not use MAG, using TRUE heading incorrectly.
• Fixed: AACQ and Bullseye information is overlapping - Bullseye symbol overlapping.
• Fixed: High drag bomb release error in Free Fall (FF) mode.
• Fixed: RAID mode can be "pre-activated" prior to entering TWS.
• Disabled Game Flight Mode.
• Fixed: ASI command makes a little overcompensation command - Pitch down tendency.
• Fixed: Check stab command NU at landing flare touch down.
• Fixed: TDC in RDR ATTK and AZ/EL does not show info for trackfiles in memory, when in STT.
• Fixed: Check trim advisory not showing.
• Fixed: Steerpoint TPOD misalignment/drift.
• Fixed: ACM Slew and NO RAD indication under specific flow.

DCS: A-10C II Tank Killer by Eagle Dynamics

• Fixed. Altimeter is missing a decimal separator for pressure setting.

DCS: AH-64D by Eagle Dynamics

• Game Flight Mode disabled.
• Fixed: CTD on turning on AH-64D TADS.
• George AI tuning.

NOTE: In the next update, we plan to add LINK, ZOOM, and C-Scope functions.

DCS: Mi-24P Hind by Eagle Dynamics

• Added: Bind for radar altimeter dangerous altitude setting
• Fixed: While “Hydro Lock” option activated , moving collective without hydro release pressed still affects avionics but not FM

DCS: P-47D Thunderbolt by Eagle Dynamics

• Fixed. P-47D-40 bugged gunsight external texture
• Fixed. hydraulics drives fail to extend undercarriage after repair
• Added. New landing gear physics

DCS: P-51D Mustang by Eagle Dynamics

• Added. New landing gear physics (including TF-51D)

DCS: Spitfire LF Mk. IX by Eagle Dynamics

• Cockpit reflection tuned

DCS: Supercarrier by Eagle Dynamics

• Fixed: Deck crew LODs have spikes
• Fixed: Supercarrier ATC radio menu is broken during takeoff from the catapult
• Fixed: Radio menu may break after repeated landing request in some case

DCS: Mirage F1 by Aerges

General:

• Rear pilot is now not present in the Mission Editor preview window (basically in payload dialog) when the 'Solo Flight' option is selected.
• The rear pilot is now not present in a human-controlled Mirage F1 BE, once in the mission, when the 'Solo Flight' option is enabled.
• Adjusted appearance of the aircraft mission options dialog.
• Now with the 'Disable force feedback effects' option checked, force feedback joysticks (if any is connected) will always return a constant spring force. All FFB shake effects will be disabled as well.
• Now with the 'Disable force feedback effects' option checked, 'Force Feedback' section in the Special Options dialog is inactive.

Radar:

• Implemented radar 'Standby' mode.
• Implemented radar power up sequence: Display is available at the 31st second after radar power up (PNE light goes out at the 35th second), and transmitter is ready after 3 minutes timeout (EMI light will cease at this moment).
• Added power up logic for the radar “AP” (parametric amplifier) light.
• Fixed dedicated 1st and 2nd stage commands of the radar antenna elevation buttons behaviour when 2nd stage is released with 1st stage still being held pressed.
• The radar resulting antenna altitude difference now can't be more than +/-48000 ft in both 'E' and 'D' elevation control modes.

Systems:

• Fixed clickability issues (shifted clickspots) with the lights panel at the right side of the Optical Sight ( 'C + M or SW' and 'Jammer Detection' lights).
• Fixed AoA light strip not illuminating in Mirage F1 BE rear cockpit.
• Fixed combat flaps logic not working in Mirage F1 BE.
• Fixed Optical Sight test symbology appearance:

1. 'Approach' test mode is now enabled for testing only when none of the weapon modes were selected.
2. Attitude scale now displays -60 deg of pitch and 180 deg of bank in normal scale display mode, and -40 mil of pitch and 180 deg of bank in simplified scale display mode.
3. Gun firing reticle now has 40 mil diameter in all test modes.
4. Adjusted the following symbols positions in various test modes: target symbol, gun firing reticle, radar command reticle.

• IFF will start in N when the aircraft is initialised hot on the ground.
• Fixed brightness adjustment of IFF lights.
• Default mode 2 IFF code is now 2000.
• Added magnetic indicator logic in the Mode 4 IFF panel.
• Fixed launch problems created by a mixed F1 and F4 rocket payload.

Flight Model:

• Added vibrations with airbrake deployment at high Mach.
• Fixed a small bug in airbrake pitching moment tables.

Communications:

• Added 'Engage Ships' radio command.
• Added 'Engage with' radio submenu.
• Added F1 TRAP 136 and TRAP 137B radios presets for Voice Chat.
• Changed TRAP 136 V/UHF radio guard frequency to the standard one: 243 MHz.
• Voice Chat intercom does not operate anymore when electric power is unavailable.

3D model and textures:

• Added cryptographic computer unit texture.

Miscellaneous:

• Updated Flight Manual. Mainly IFF description, including mode 4, and Controls Window description.

DCS: C-101 Aviojet by AvioDev

General:

• Rear pilot is now not present in the Mission Editor preview window (basically in payload dialog) when the 'Solo Flight' option is selected.
• 'Solo Flight' is now available for AI-controlled aircraft.
• Fixed C-101EB 'English' cockpit livery not being applied.
• Now with the 'Disable force feedback effects' option checked, force feedback joysticks (if any is connected) will always return a constant spring force. All FFB shake effects will be disabled as well.

Communications:

• Added Voice Chat sound filters parameters for ARC-134, V/TVU-740, and VHF-20B radios presets.

DCS: JF-17 by Deka Ironwork Simulations

• New: inSky SATAC 2022 Champion skin
• New: draw two airspace on HSD (A: purple and B: cyan)
  • MISSION (default): Added by mission maker using draw->line->segments
    • Blue: BKYA and BKYB
    • Red: RKYA and RKYB
    • Neutral: NKYA and NKYB
  • F10 Label: Added by player on F10 using label
    • JKYA1~JKYA10 and JKYB1~JKYB10
    • Always closed polygon
  • Preset: Added by preset lua
    • Each terrain has its own airspace lua
    • Lua sample can be found in JF-17/Doc directory
    • Lua (file) can be edited (replaced) during (MP) mission for quick update
    • In MP, each flight/squadron can use its own lua (convenient distribution)
    • Help keep F10 map clean
  • Clean: remove airspace from HSD
  • Note:
    • You can select airspace source in configuration panel then update DTC
    • Each draw no more than 10 line segments
• Fixed: unstoppable refocus of WMD7 camera
• Fixed: WMD7 laser cannot be repaired after run out of life
• Adjusted: WMD7 CCD image source (better CCD grey image)
• Adjusted: install/remove ladder and inlet cover via config panel
• Adjusted: switched to ED’s GB-6 and LS-6

DCS: Black Shark 3 by Eagle Dynamics

• Fixed Ka-50 old QS Syria missions corrupted start position
• Incorrect audio/subtitle warning given for INU Fixpoint within 18km - fixed

DCS: F-14 Tomcat by Heatblur Simulations

• Fixed minor vertex normal issues on left engine nacelle (A)
• Slightly improved rendering performance by merging some indicator elements.
• Fixed various minor issues in LoD 1-3.

DCS: Flaming Cliffs by Eagle Dynamics

• A-10A. Panel lights texture issue (border) - fixed
• A-10A. Cockpit model adjustments
• Su-33. Reflections can be too strong at odd times on gauges - fixed
• Su-25T. Kh-58 missile collide with plane during launch with big sideslip angle - fixed
• A-10A. HSI and ILS are not working - fixed
• Su-25A. CCRP ripple release mode does not work with MBD2-67 - fixed
• Su-27. MFD placed in wrong place in HUD view mode - fixed

DCS: L-39 Albatros by Eagle Dynamics

• Added Marianas Instant Action missions

DCS: Mi-8MTV2 by Eagle Dynamics

• Cockpit reflections tuned

DCS: Yak-52 by Eagle Dynamics

• FIXED: Reflections too strong under flashlight

DCS: Combined Arms by Eagle Dynamics

• Fixed player-JTAC operation in MP.

DCS: NS430 by Eagle Dynamics

• Fixed. Terrain mode memory leak leads to CTD
• Fixed. Options menus have truncated labels
• Fixed. Wrong indicated ground speed
• Fixed. HFOM and VFOM statuses on GPS page won't fit into its fields
• Fixed. Crash that happens during zooming in and out on the Persian Gulf map

Campaigns

DCS: A-10C Operation Agile Spear Campaign by Combat King Simulations Campaign was updated to version 2.3

• All Missions - Top down review and many bugs squashed big and small. Many thanks to Pyrocumulous! His help was instrumental.
• All missions - radio frequencies better coordinated for all aircraft in the strike package
• All missions - updated Datalink connections for all like aircraft.
• All missions - changed all displayed messages to Clearview
• All missions - updated to new F10 menu system which adds new options for the player to manage thier simulation's environment. Thanks Gareth Magnall https://www.youtube.com/@Pukin-Dog
• All missions - Wingmen (Pig-2, 3 & 4) changed over to a seperate group for more tasking flexibility. Thanks B.D.
• All missions - added the option of a Practice Sortie to each mission. This will allow the mission pilot to exit the primary mission, fly a practice sortie with the same loadout as the primary mission, and then reenter the primary mission. The mission pilot can fly and practice any technique/profile, rearm and refuel as desired, and then re-enter the primary mission when ready.
• All missions - now have the ability to accelerate time (fast forward between waypoints) without missing any mission critical inputs or messages. Thanks Sedlo.
• All missions - datacards use different font/colors for easier reading.
• All missions - end of mission music added.

DCS: F/A-18C Flaming Sunrise Campaign by Sandman Simulations

• All missions – Air defense visibility adjusted to get AI SEAD flights attack higher priority targets over Rapiers and AAA

DCS: F/A-18C Inherent Resolve Campaign by Looking Glass

• Updated mission 13

DCS: F-14A Fear the Bones Campaign by Reflected Simulations

• Su-25T was removed from modules list

DCS: F/A-18C Inherent Resolve Campaign by Looking Glass

• Added campfire to mission 1 to assist in location of enemy training camp

P-51D: The Blue Nosed Bastards of Bodney Campaign by Reflected Simulations

• ATC frequencies changed and corrected

Spitfire IX The Big Show Campaign by Reflected Simulations

• Complete revamp of the campaign to version 2.0
• Every mission uses historical locations now
• Mission historical inconsistencies fixed
• Mission timings adjusted based on further research
• Smoothened triggers
• More voice overs and sound effects added
• Reworked kneeboards and briefing visuals
• Corrected mission timings
• ATC frequencies changed and corrected yet again.

DCS: P-51D Debden Eagles Campaign by Reflected Simulations

• ATC frequencies changed and corrected yet again.
• All takeoff sequences were reworked

DCS: Fw 190 A-8 Horrido! Campaign by Reflected Simulations

• More damage fail safes added to mission 12

Bf 109 K-4 Jagdflieger Campaign by Reflected Simulations

• ATC frequencies changed and corrected

DCS: P-47D Wolfpack Campaign by Reflected Simulations

• Mission 12 - flight has no bombs - fixed

A-10C / A-10C II Basic Flight Training Qualification Campaigns by Maple Flag Missions

• Corrected CMSP Switch Trigger Test for both A-10C and A-10C II BFT01 missions.

DCS: UH-1H Worlds Apart - Spring 2025 Campaign

• Mission 1 - In some cases, AI does not trigger when landing at station 1. The trigger has been adjusted and the take-off can be forced as a solution via the F-10 radio menu.

DCS: Raven One Dominant Fury Campaign
Mission 2:

• fixed issue where mission would not progress after reporting seeing the yacht
• complete mission update to match new radio system
• F10 radio menu and space bar now can be replaced by HOTAS switches for better immersion
• added Link4 and ACLS to the carrier

Mission 9:

• fixed issue with Texaco 21 refuelling of Texaco 11
• fixed issue with SCUDs not firing and breaking the mission
• complete mission update to match new radio system
• F10 radio menu and space bar now can be replaced by HOTAS switches for better immersion
• added Link4 and ACLS to the carrier
• added working TACAN to all flight members

F/A-18C Serpent’s Head 2 Campaign by Badger633

• Missions 1: Fail on entering display fixed.
• Missions 3,5, 8 and 10: EZ refuel versions Fords fuel mass reduced

F/A-18C Rise of the Persian Lion by Badger633

• Mission 6: IR shield removed from enemy Helos.
• Mission 7: Convoy blocking itself and not moving fixed.
• Missions 4 to 9 and 13: EZ refuel versions Fords fuel mass reduced.

F/A-18C Rise of the Persian Lion 2 by Badger633

• Mission 6: F18 not exploding fixed.
• Mission 4,6,8,9a,9a and 12: EZ refuel versions Fords fuel mass reduced.
• Mission 12: Bugged moving rectangular zone fixed.

Known issues:

• Propeller and Jet wash effect on nearby vegetation environment was added but not finished yet WIP
• F-16C - Flight Alignment procedure still requires some tuning, coming in a future update. In-Flight Alignment in pre-GPS era requires additional couple of FIXes in addition to the first two OFLY FIX to calculate the velocity properly. These FIXes can be made in any suitable mode: TPOD, FCR, HUD, OFLY, the only requirement is to keep the aircraft at a straight line between the fixes. Of course, the fixes should be done precisely.

Please help me pick a hair tool before my coupon expires tomorrow!
Hair: Long, past bra strap, layered, fine but porous, naturally curly/wavy, I like it to be worn in smooth classic big curls/volume, nothing crazy. Color treated and about to be keratin treated (straight) for summer, but healthy and trimmed on the regular. I’m in one of the most humid cities in the U.S.
Current routine: blow dry, straightener, curling wand for mids/ends. I’m desperate to combine at least two steps to cut down on time, but I CANNOT figure it out.
I’ve tried the Revlon and Drybar blow dry round brushes- they leave my hair just like a blow dryer- puffy/frizzy, still needing a straightener, and take longer than a regular blow dryer (and I’ve tried all the products with them). I’ve tried curling with my straightener, but my current one (Paul Mitchell Ion Smooth+, plates showing wear) doesn’t do well for this and flat iron curls aren’t my fave. But I HAVE to always flat iron, or the second I step outside its poof city.
Currently considering: Chi Lava 4D to maybe iron and curl, Shark Flexstyle (but I suspect I’ll STILL need an iron for smoothing, so iffy on it), something like the L’ange Le Duo Airflow Styler?
The keratin treatments make it so quick to dry and dry mostly straight, but then I have to still flat iron, add volume and curl. Think old school hot roller curls- that’s what I like - but I’ve tried so many sets (T3, Conair, Revlon, Caruso) and those curls don’t stay for even 3 hours. I’ve tried every roller spray and hairspray. They just don’t get hot enough, and I still have to flat iron before using.
I’m down for literally any recommendations!

This poem is INSANE.
SOME VERY POPULAR SONGS
for example cows beneath the moon, peaceful souls, ruminating, Buddha-guts in the high grass, hidden between small trees and
clumps of brush in the constant greenness, a practical black-and-white- spotted metaphysics, tormented by summer flies which stick to their
saliva. The space hangs inside their eyes like a gong, which beckons to the slaughterhouse. Or a blue rain barrel in the south, where
the sky is an endless continuation of blue, hallucinated spaces during the day, but real. The tricks of the Rolling Stones are over.
I listen to Leonard Cohen singing, there is a war between the men and the women, why don’t you come on back to the war, it’s just be-
ginning. Various grasses grow along the edges, enchanted green. The grass is moved, moves itself, and all the years came, like
always, one after the other: good- bye, fast cloud, goodbye blue sky in the window frames, good- bye, dried grass,
naked in the first twilight, goodbye. A wet barbed wire fence stands there, crooked posts, goodbye, suburbs, as though
no one lives there, fragments of biographies and newspapers, the senseless waving. Some lines are like the waving of children from a
train window while passing through strange cities in the afternoon, passing the rows of low-rent apartments with the single faces at the windows:
if all the confessions in the world that were ever given and written down in the courts of the world were put together and
dragged by one after the other, what an endless misery it would be to be in the world. Someone calls, dials any old
number, and I hear only their breath, and there again is the distance, the soft crackling noise of the
confusion in another place, and otherwise nothing there in the afternoon. And in the morning, when you get up and stare at the hotel
breakfast and you don’t understand why you’re in this hotel room, where you actually are, and you think about what you can do at eight in the morning
after an almost sleepless night, and nothing else comes to mind except to take the three dirty shirts to the laundry, having already
showered at seven, do you embrace the morning light at nine? Or do you say, goodbye, morning light? And then you hear the rush
of a flushing toilet while you walk along a long hallway and what do you feel then? That everything is in order? At ten someone calls and
talks about death, and you make a joke about the film projectionist with cancer who’s been with the company for 25 years, and whoever else is in the room
laughs as well. Who goes through the rooms, unfamiliar, and remembers the lines from the song: Green leaves, how are you alone? What sort of damned lonely
business letters are being written. The signatures don’t matter at all. And you sing your song, “Lady, I’m out of here!” That also belongs to the popular
songs. The peaceful Buddha-souls lie spotted black-and-white in the greenness. They chew beneath the same light the soft green grass again.

1. (for H.S.)

Where the ruble disintegrates into single kopecks, or the dollar into cents, or the D-mark into pfennigs like guilders, where the lira disintegrates
like the franc into centimes and the English pound into the cheap tobacco of Spanish coins, where the ostmark breaks into eye-wrinkles and a
tractor stands in the candlelight, where the Swedish öre disintegrates into insurance like world empires, where the sturgeon dies in the rivers and the herring
in the North Sea, where the distances between the cities grow like the disintegration among the single cities, where the yen is changed into the cruzeiro,
where too much is invested in soap, where the Bulgarian tin cans are converted into Argentinean bank drafts, disintegrating like the Finnish
currency, where forests are rafted down the rivers, where bone meal becomes plastic, where sums are copied, where the geese become zlotys
and are frozen in black aspic, where the dinar drives the camel, the corn rots in the fields, decaying like teeth which will be exchanged, where the
peso dies miserably, the black underwear rises, disintegrating like revenue stamps into whichever sort of coins the faces may disintegrate, into whatever bodily needs, piss, dirt paths, rest
rooms and bed sheets, where the army is financing the study of poetry, where the technical institutes explain the world, the twitching heart of a turtle
hanging from a thread for all to see, where the licenses set the limits, decomposing into animal-pictures, where signatures are needed, testaments, accounts, where the bank
holidays are there for a sigh of relief, to hang out the flags and decorate the day, where the carbide stank, where the bottles burst, where the rubble lay strewn and the tattoos,
the companies proliferate like the mass media, the chunks of stone and rubble have been cleared aside, the pain and the sorrow sold off, decomposed into monthly wages,
where there is still something to do, the specter of unemployment drives them together, the ghosts of the owners, the ghosts of the employees, where all of them are busy
administering this world, or what they consider to be this world, traps, driven together in the offices, but the offices disintegrate, where the rooms have many doors and glass
walls, the elevator shafts disintegrate, the arcades disintegrate, smashed store windows, mold spores, wild vegetation, in between store-window
mannequins, rats scurrying through long ruined arcades, rats in the pale empty corridors of the skyscrapers, where the last cripples are still being
driven together, everyone driven together to administrate this world, these walls, cyclone fences, entrances, the class- rooms like ruined swimming pools,
like signatures which disintegrate, where nights the children scream in the apartment towers, dismally bound to the silence, where the children throw up
their baby food again, where the bodies lie next to each other in the darkness and masturbate in order to go to sleep, finally exhausted and empty, decomposing
like the face of a television announcer in the half-insane dream, who makes new announcements in different voices like on scratched records, disintegrating
like shillings, where the twisted pain becomes jokes in a dialect, applauded by the ranks, where the ranks finally disintegrate, where a radio announcer
pulls her tampon out of the hairy hole between her legs on the toilet in the office of the National Public Radio during a pause in which poems are read, where the
Sundays are endless, decayed like sick lungs, where it is said, that is not your face, that is not your face, where the coins disintegrate into faces, old
faces, dead faces, grieved and hideous on the banknotes which disintegrate, where we go, simple daylight sparkles in the rain puddles, sparkles in the
dripping trees, pleasure, the astonishment of the eyes, when you laughed as you saw your trailer, the beautiful laughter of a total lack of understanding as you opened
the car door, where the checks corroded the surroundings, paper disintegrated into nickel, decayed like a currency made from black dream-slag, which crumbles at the
next touch, where a woman has no other chance than forward through the bushes, like Bolivar disintegrating into centimos, where maybe you’re in a dream,
it’s time that we tell each other more stories, where one doesn’t stand with their back to the wall, but rather in an open door, in the daylight, which doesn’t disintegrate like the
wavy plateau with the lethargic chicken hawks circling above, quiet black movements, clear in the air, where the sky no longer fits in the picture and together with the clouds
passes by in the window. Who’s calling through the frozen forests? Who’s wandering through the snowed-in halls? Who’s freezing and huddled together in the endless
transfer station, where the rupees disintegrate, changed into dirhams, faces upon them, theories of probability, dog bones, death a white apparition in a
white invisible tent, Jeep tracks with dust clouds trailing behind, death is a dried-up camel skeleton by the wayside, death is a
dead skunk on the highway, death is a dead cat on an empty parking lot, death is the long rows of suits on the chromed
rack in the next men’s department, death is a chopped down tree, where the shadow-shoes lie, worn out, where the houses have no
walls anymore, where the electric lights wander about in the rooms, nuclear decay, multiplication, optical lenses, behind the frost patterns on the window the book is shut
and a face cries, a brain is opened, the exhilaration of a dark, clear winter night is illuminated by constellations and does not fall, where death is a dried-
up river bed, white gravel and the plateaus fly by, you see that, we saw them spread out, the plateaus, flying by white in the headlights,
I went back into the hastily constructed apartment, the dreams continuing, the plateau white, I stared into the aluminum pot, at the rest of the broccoli under the light,
the plateau passing by, white, with the slight indication that we make, where a dirty, rickety claw is a clean hand stroking a mahogany
table, having plundered the many daydreams, now it lies rickety and crooked on the clean surface, where the Luxembourgean francs become Malian
dollars, which disintegrate into Cuban pesos, who is it who shits out money and lets a forest die so that he can appear in the comics, massaged on the beach, he with the mantraps
and self-inflicted gunshots, observed by helicopters, a marked man, who is it who drags their suitcase through the bus station, who is it who drops a coin into the TV automat, who is it who skims the
psychoanalytical journals in order to solve a case, who is it who interprets the world, who is it who interprets the next construction- site fence, who is it who interprets the apartment,
shadows of people burned into the asphalt, stones with human shadows on exhibit, aerial photographs of the landscape allowed for postcard greetings
by the Minister of War, he who allows, believes he has the rights for fencing in, where the piastres are scrap, poetry is not a waiting room where one stays overnight, tired,
behind a newspaper opened to the swarming masses of war, every word is war, scrap-words like death, driven together in herds, without differences,
should I have slept with your wife, should I have had more magazines, should I have used the dish- washer, should I have followed the movie
posters, filigree-gray hypothetical questions, tendrils, cement ornamentation, where the dreams die off like plateaus, a canister on the shark, the daily view out the
window into this side street, which you don’t know, where the dollar disintegrates into kopecks and the ruble into cents, where pesetas are wrung from the bones,
but the pleasure is greater than the sorrow, the drachma is smaller than the lust, reduced to a hundred lepta, which disappear at the next opportunity,
where the Turkish pounds are extracted from the tendons, decayed, decayed in the buildings of the 19th & 20th centuries in West Germany, extensions, bills, obligations, everything
the same, pawned off, worn out, trashed, pawned off again on television, from the serial, from the jukebox. Gentle face, in the middle of the crowd you’ve seen
the twitching body, suddenly the concert was over, did you stammer, did you cry, where the corridors are cement, where the speaker boxes boomed, where the faces
broke into dream-wrinkles, where the city maps have white spots, where the color white in no way means death, where the dog fur fails to warm, where the ways end, Ivory Coast is a
fantastic name, tattoos, scars, moving in, moving out, many thanks.

1. (History)

Last night I was thinking about the love story of Adolf Hitler. I saw the permanent waves in the hair of Eva Braun. How many German women
today look like the smile of Eva Braun. The photos reproduce themselves. I was not, I know, born in a photograph. Snow fell in April,
as I was born, shrouded in the ornamental cloth of the baptism ritual. The war, I don’t understand what that is, which language is where? Eva Braun
smiled at Adolf Hitler, that was in Berlin. What did Adolf Hitler first say to Eva Braun? Which distances exist between the permanent waves on the
photo and the old fashioned curling iron for permanent waves which I saw later on a windowsill? As I slept in the Academy of Art in Berlin, I thought about
this curling iron for permanent waves. The photo was a memory which I looked at. Twenty years later I looked at a fat face in the daily
paper, which drank ersatz coffee in a Berlin hotel from a hotel coffee cup, the title was Professor, the title was not to be identi- fied. Eva Braun, was your neck shaved?
Eva Braun, what did you think about the Sarotti chocolates? Adolf Hitler, as you went through Munich with your Pelikan watercolors, what did you see? The Sütterlin script ruined the
handwriting. From the handwriting I was supposed to learn. Adolf Hitler skimmed over the city maps. Eva Braun looked in the crystal mirror at her cunt. Which size
did your thighs have, Eva Braun? I know girls who look exactly like the Eva Braun who looks like Eva Braun in the photo. I grew up, considered my pubic hairs, considered
nipples, considered the reeds, years later I considered the picture of Eva Braun. In the same month a breast of the wife of the American president would be
cut off, in another historical photo old men polished their assholes on brocade-lined armchairs after the conference, the southern afternoon is full of
junk, dust, crumbling constructions. What was with the intestinal worms which Adolf Hitler’s German shepherd had? What was with Eva Braun? A storybook story which one suppressed
like years later the interpretations, ended. Half of Austria arrived in a train, kissed Eva Braun’s hand, looked at her tits, sealed with permanent waves. Adolf Hitler
passed out postcards. I saw my mother in a photo in a long row sitting and laughing, I saw my father in a photo going along a tree-lined avenue,
naive in uniform like an avenue tree, what were they playing as they were photographed? I saw the creases in the pants of Adolf Hitler in a photo, I saw, four years
old, a dark train station passing by in 1944, I saw an enameled sign with blue and yellow wool and knitting needles on the red brick wall of a train station,
Eva Braun, did Adolf Hitler tenderly stroke your pussy with his tongue? Adolf Hitler, did Eva tenderly suck your cock? Or was that taboo thanks to
the state and politics? Come stains on the winter coat, a couple of generals in the toilet, they drew battle plans on the shitty wall, named names, heights, deployments,
Eva Braun, what did you feel when you got the capsule? Did you simply think you’d had your chance? Did you think, now I’ve had it? And the teeth of the German shepherd
fell out of his jaw after the strong injection. The orgasm of death is cheaper than the orgasm of life, although it’s questionable whether the orgasm of death isn’t simply pent up
life that explodes. Why isn’t life in the multitudes every day? Why permanent waves, Eva Braun? Why are you smiling, Eva Braun? Why
do you take cough syrup, Eva Braun? Didn’t Adolf Hitler know that the Austrian psychoanalysis, lying in the sentences, lies? I was never at the river Inn, also
have no desire to look at the water, also have no desire to look at the water in Cologne, dead water, full of dead fish and plants, dead water, which they fought over, borders,
coals, fires for the industry, furnaces, embers in the night, dancing figures before the open fires of the industrial complexes, no holy saint swims in these dead waters, no holy saint spits
out the apartment window, the crude passing through is better than taking pills, the patents, Eva Braun, how was it for you under the shower, German charcoal, flamingo flowers, Spanish irises
and pails? Adolf Hitler in a nightshirt, in the cement, under the earth’s surface, sparkle of nerves, dancing over the files, he dreamed madly in the cement bunker,
supposedly never hit anyone personally, he had others enough to do his hitting, there are always others who sign, hit, hang, indeed there are
always others, employees, secretaries, office boys, insanity, Eva Braun, you straw puppet, smoke, cyanide, trace elements, signatures, which suddenly become single living
persons, things, the shabby things, they’re standing in the room. Did Adolf Hitler stand before you in the room with a stiff cock, Eva Braun? Who washed your bra, Eva Braun? Did you think about
Persil laundry soap? World history in the form of industrial comics, Eva Braun, a lace dress in the large hall, among the human voices, shoulders lifted high, did you see them? What’s with
the dyed hair? What’s with that old high German? What’s with the fossilized love stories? Word-ghosts, dirty bastards of history, stumbling through the rhymes,
between the film-shadows of Berlin, shadow gestures, projection-screen-shadows, shadow-screams, collapsing shadows, later accompanied by a soundtrack, synchronised
lip movements, Eva Braun, in which magazines were you reading? I have to remember: my mother loved airplanes and ghosts, which reappeared, phantoms, she dreamed of them,
even before she cooked for the men at the airfield, in her odd French, my father borrowed a car in his school-English, the top rolled back, they
stopped in the countryside, they fucked at the edge of a warm yellow wheat field in July. My mother loved cheap paperbacks, she looked to see if the seam in her stockings was straight, she went
across the meadow in a silky shimmering dress. The father-in-law left his library to the state of Israel for a sentimental reason, and what happened before, that these forms
developed, more sentimental than the memory of house-corners and street names? More sentimental than permanent waves in a photo? I have to remember the pale suburban settlement, I
have to think about the truck that suddenly stopped in front of the house, packed with people and their belongings, billets to make the foreignness even foreigner, checked off
the lists, bedpans, briefcases, pomaded and parted, they had nothing, owned the in- sanity of never-owned imaginary goods, if they spoke, from where they came, the biographies ruined
by dead Austria, old myths, fallow fields, the opposite is not the industry, the oppo- site disappears in the old photos, in which history disintegrated all around, Eva Braun, opaque
window glass, portals, coma in a Swedish hotel room, shots in the leg above the stocking garter. Now the computers are tossing bones in the air, Stanley Kubrick, the film trick
is revealed, despite four-channel-stereo in the red-plush cinemas of Soho, where I am one rainy evening, walking through London alone, quiet, collected, in the light gray, windy
February evening, decaying London, elegiac West End streets, elegiac advertisements, elegiac theater buildings and striptease clubs, elegiac filthy book stores under aged,
murky dust, rusted leaky water pipes along the house fronts, a senselessly ringing alarm on a house wall, dismally yellowed paint, entrances with the names of bodily flesh,
which for a few moments can be bought, contact between a lonely cock and a cold cunt before the weak gas heater of the rented room, miserable and lost in the
maze of numbers, bleak and frozen in the money. Eva Braun, who wrote you postcards? Eva Braun, have you ever stood freezing in Piccadilly? Eva Braun, what did you say in the moment
when that photo was taken? After the movie I crawl shivering under the thin blanket of a cheap hotel in Bayswater, Odeon station, the monster quarter of London, crumbling courtyards, buried
bodies, the gas-fired fireplace doesn’t heat, the wallpaper is stained, I read a few more poems by Frank O’Hara and W.C. Williams, I drink the rest of some cold coffee out of
the paper cup that stands on the marble mantle over the fireplace, I’m alone in these American poems and see myself in them in the middle of this London night, yellow fog lights along the
streets, Victorian monster-columns and portals the whole street long, windows patched with cardboard, curtain-scraps, and suddenly, in the silence, completely crazy, I remember the call sign
of the BBC radio one morning during the war. I remember the after-the-war-chocolate of the English soldiers, blue plums on a cart, which was being pushed through a courtyard,
Strauss waltzes, a dark movie theater and war. A bone tossed in the air, a killer’s tool on the white screen of the memory, a flickering shadow, hidden behind ornamental flowers,
together with the shadow-noises from the stereo speakers is nothing but a shadow in the eerie, insane ballroom of Death, which is the air, Death blows bubbles in the air, it’s much better to relax
peacefully with a liverwurst sandwich during the lunch break, better to eat the plums out of the icebox without saying you’re sorry, better to drink cold coffee from a paper cup
in a hotel room at night, better than moving pictures, aerial photographs, Eva Braun, I’m thinking here in this Cologne night, stuffy and dismal, while I look at a photo, which tells of the love
story, kitschy and hand-colored, Eva Braun, little monster among the decor, smiling stupid and sad in the photo, and before the photo was taken,
really. The eyebrows are touched up, your mouth is open, lipstick on the lips, are the stocking seams straight? Are you wearing a flowered dress? Has someone
messed up your hair? What’s with the accent? Did someone give you a horny look, your slightly fat baby face? Have you forgotten your cunt? Did your cunt dry up out of fear as the war began?
Berlin sky, as I flew in with a Pan Am plane, I first saw a cemetery between the houses, the gentlemen laid their newspapers on the empty seats,
the taxi driver swore about the passers-by as the lights went on. In the subway hall someone held their bloody, dripping face between their hands and turned toward the tiled wall
as the automatic doors slammed shut. Did you mend your stockings with Güterman’s silk thread? How did you look in a swimsuit? Did you shave your armpits?
Shaved armpits always look like soap and deodorant, stubbly and slick. Fantasy has taken over the industry with its employees.
Did you eat a liverwurst sandwich? Did the liverwurst sandwich taste good? Did Adolf Hitler have sweaty feet? Did he kiss your hand? Did he talk in his sleep? What did you take
against the headaches? What did you think as you were chauffeured along the Kurfürstendamm? In the fading shadows of 5 in the morning I sit there between the folded up,
locked up patio chairs and tables, smoke kif in the shadow of the Café Kranzler awning and walk through the tear gas clouds and shards of glass from the shattered storefront windows, the whores
having hastily retreated as the street battle began a few hours ago, then I take the first subway train to the Wannsee, where a couple of swans are rocking between the garbage along the shore, a lifeless pier,
a weak dawn, light gray. What kind of fur coat did you wear? What kind of toothpaste did you use? I tremble in the first dawn in Berlin, take the socks from the radiator,
let down the shades. It’s a pity that you didn’t invent love, Eva Braun. I write this rock ‘n’ roll song about your terrible insanity, Eva Braun. Would you have
liked this song? Would you have sweated as you danced? What did you talk about as you were alone in the cement bunker? Why the color brown? What did the tongue demand? No one loved Adolf Hitler, and that was why he
had to win the war? Did you see the bodies? Did you see the hand-to-hand combat? Did you see the flame-throwers? Did you see the burned faces? Did you see the gas-cripples? Did you
see the killer-virus spores? Did you see the flower-shadows? Did you look out the window? Did you turn off the nightstand lamp? The permanent waves of
order on your head, your fat, bare shoulder, your underwear from the department store, your pierced ear lobe for the jewel, your handkerchief with the mucous, the camellia
between the legs, your ass-shapes in the garter belt, your nipples, will they remain a secret? In the middle of the historical showplaces of the war, the war is a showplace, who even
looks? Is a love story necessary that needs so many questions? Now you’ve disappeared in the historical photo. Now the disguises are going around. Now the story is broken down and over.

1. (D-Train)

: letting the newspaper flutter out the rolled down window, a child’s hand, with the
shreds of paper against it,
the misery (foreign countries), which invests in this country, sits on every furtively glanced-at
street corner, sad, tired faces, without expression, bags under the eyes, lines around the tight-lipped mouth,
a young woman cries from exhaustion in a two-and-a-half room apartment, in the unfolded architecture of geometry, it’s night and the heating pipes are ticking,
Quote: “The most dangerous animal that exists is the architect. He has destroyed more than the war.”
Hair loss following birth, fear on the street, in the middle of the day, if one stands still, surrounded by the multitudes, the absent
glances, waking up, coughing & spitting
in the sink, postponed material circumstances, the delicate bodies pushed up against the walls by the cars, the same rows of suburban streets
all the way into the inner city,
single, running bodies between the
convoys of the auto industry, blurred figures
behind the dirt-flecked security glass windows, smaller than their own bodies in the industrial shells,
the newspaper rips in the headwind,
shreds of paper drift over the narrow gardens along the tracks, kites made of stinky printer’s ink, collages of the daily gradual madness,
frozen swirls of words: brand names,
reptile brains, hate, slander, semantics, the
big families continue on. In the streets the skinny girls’ bodies, bones with a little skin over them, in colorful rags from the second-hand store,
“when the music’s over” between the rain-
faded old advertisements, (neon-light extinguished curiosity to live, calligraphy)
extinguished poetry. The dawns
are damp and impassable, masses of bent-over figures, they disappear in the offices, they go into the stores, they have to go to schools, kindergartens,
their ways of life distinctive between
rows of products and shelves, in the pestilent-light-flicker of the TV at night the faces of the politicians appear and discuss, in the pestilent-light-flicker
of the TV the strange faces appear on the wall of the room: do you remember
“until the end” the dark house entrances, in which we stood together,
do you remember your own kisses in the stairwell, do you remember kisses
at all? (Or what
you felt?) Submerged in the glowing grass along the paths, seen from the open train window, we let the newspaper shreds fly.
Yellow afternoon light reflects in the windows which we pass by, September-yellow
and what kind of country is this,
what kind of thoughts are
thought to the finish here, finally to the end,
the end “the aristocracy
of feelings,” hahahaha, that’s
not to my taste,
if anyone should have anything to do with that at all, IBM-typewriter-feelings and kisses,
I stretch out my feet, how does that one over the other, in this fit together? compartment, the white Converse All
Star basketball shoes, 12 dollars, on the red plastic seat, and once again the piece of newspaper torn for the child at the open
train window: how the words fly (masks),
the fragments, it’s one of those gentle afternoons that we rarely have, light over the pale, monotone cities, soft afternoon light
on the crumbling facades of the suburbs
and tract homes, soft September-afternoon-light
on the faces in the open windows which we pass by, gentle human-faces in September,
the hate of the newspapers rips, flutters as paper in the hand, that cheerful sound in the moving
D-Train: it brings us from the northwest regions of West Germany through the zones of industry and profit,
dead, abandoned winding-towers, black wheels in the air, slag heaps, dead roads, black, sooty steam locomotives on a dead
track, rusted railway lines
& dust-coated Scotch broom along the embankment, do you really remember your own kisses?
And when the West (“Oh to be out of here, German industry here where everything went collapses? as wished except for the new”)
“Here in this land I live!”: do you really live? (“To be far away and in a foreign No, not this country.” E.P.) sensation.
Until now this was a foreign country, wherever you look,
Memory: I hear the shaky The chestnut voice of the poet on a record tree in the in an apartment, evening, lightless sinister hallways narrow courtyard, and without voices, maybe 60 names on the nameplate in the entryway still-standing by the glass door, locked early, elevators, the stairwell light out, a red glowing light switch at the end of the hall, the calendar and then in the midst of the lifelessness picture television film sounds behind a door on a as I walk along there / the voice of the office wall, poet stuttering in on a Sunday morning, and sun now, after the hallways, in this blinds, West German apartment years later suddenly again)
Prone Venus and Coca Cola 1974, verbs in a continuous chronology, “this Coca Cola of the entire world”
why do you want to speak nicely?
“Must we be idiots and dream in the partial obscurities of a dubious mood in order to be poets?“ (W.C.W.)
Burned out in a beautiful September light, the personal economy: a total disaster,
is the economy a personal feeling? Contradictions because I speak, contradictions because I think
about it: notes in the newspaper margin, being torn to shreds. The few friends scattered about the suburbs, the new friends strewn singly across the country-
side. Different voices, different biographies,
deviations, “good so.”
Discussion: Where everything is forced to connect…
What did you feel as you touched the naked body with your lips, what did you
feel in the middle of the trashed
landscape, word-gods, side-street-sex, under the arranged machines? Let me remember, you say, let me remember, leave me
alone, you say, leave me, gentle face
in a soft September light, like now: answer softly
answer, “in the midst of the daily plundering, or?”
Like the faces in the open afternoon-windows don’t answer. There is a sheet-metal field, dented,
“valse d’autumn” or how such a feeling is called,
not the clarity of looking out a D-Train window, gentle, gentle rhythm here now,
let me, let me remember, you say. Small train stations appear and remain behind,
meaningless structures, : remain behind? meaningless stops : meaningless?
yellow-red fire in a scrap yard,
gentle, gentle woods, last remains of forests in which the thin morning fog still hangs, traces of dampness, not
bent over, small peaceful ponds, forgotten
at the edge of an estate (:“we’re coming back,” in that house, we’re coming home, home?) for the eyes a fugitive rest, from the train window
looking out, the long, slow
even view across this country. There is a hunkered-down green, fantastic green, which passes by, and a child’s hand stretched out the train
window.
Why sadness? All: you gentle
faces in the afternoon light (no faces : you gentle faces between for the coins) the billboards, you gentle
faces in the window frames,
you gentle faces in the September light, you gentle faces of West Germany, tired and sad, you gentle faces, hungry for cunt, cock, tits, hungry for an exotic everyday
life, hungry for a kiss, hungry to feel your own kiss between the walls,
hungry between the advertisements, hungry between the classified ads, hungry between the pictures,
the advertising sales department closes at nine in the evening the movie theaters are darkened, to show a
little more life, the box offices close a quarter-hour after the main feature begins,
the television station broadcasts until shortly after midnight, hungry in the narrow
gardens, hungry for a gentle embrace,
what do you give your selves? What kind of a horror is that, when one stops in the middle of the street, standing among the passers-by,
& each for everyone a passer-by.

IV

The woman who lets him in doesn't look as he expected her to. She is in her late middle age, conservatively dressed in a gray skirt and yellow blouse, her iron-gray hair up in a bun. She has the appearance of an elementary school principal. He looks around her house and it also doesn't live up to his expectations. No Occult regalia in sight, no pentagram on the wall, no black candles, no skulls. It is brightly lit and cheerfully average. He could be standing in anyone's living room.
Please, have a seat, she instructs him.
He sits on the sofa.
Give me a moment, please. She exits the room, then comes back moments later with a silver tray upon which sit a porcelain teapot and cups. She offers him tea which he politely declines. She sits in a straight back armchair across the coffee table from him and sips her tea.
He wonders doubtfully if he has the right person. As if she has read his mind, she replies: Yes, I am the one you've been seeking.
She favors him with an inquisitive look. How did you find me?
He explains and she nods. I thought so. And why have you come to me?
He begins to explain, starting from the beginning. The movie theater. The ambulance. The hospital. The funeral. The police line up. The trial. The present. It takes him half an hour. He tells her what he desires.
She raises an eyebrow. If you don't mind me asking you, why go to so much trouble? Surely there are, um, more conventional means to reach your goal...
Yes, I know. Believe me, I've considered that. I could get a gun, find them and shoot them dead. I could dismember them piece by piece slowly while they're still alive. I could burn them alive, I could do anything to them. But what would I achieve by doing that? I could only kill them once. They'd be dead, and I'd still be alive. And in hell. It's a hell I've been living in every second of every day for six long months. A hell I don't ever expect to be free from until I die. Every time I close my eyes I see...her. What they did to her. I see her face looking to me for help. I see her lying there in her own blood. I see her lying in her coffin. I hear her screams every night in my sleep. I don't want them to just die. I want them to suffer like she did. They took everything from me. Everything. I want them to suffer for eternity.
You're not a religious man, are you?
No. I never have been. And I have even less reason to believe in God than I did before.
How can you not believe in God but still believe in hell? In demons?
It's a logical assumption. Evil is always prevalent. Every day, all over the world. Goodness is much harder to come by, much more rare. I found that goodness once. And I lost it. Now all I know is evil.
Then you must be willing to commit that evil yourself.
I am.
Are you sure?
Yes. The word spoken with doubtless credence. A testament.
She considers him for a timeless moment. She sighs, resigned. Very well. She begins.
First, you must understand. Yes, there are such things as spirits. What some would call demons. A great many of them. They transcend all religions and cultures. They are ancient, older than mankind. As old as the world itself, or perhaps even older. You should think of them more like elemental forces, like the wind. They travel from place to place, all over the world. They aren't bound to any creed, any custom, any people. They each have different characteristics, different attributes. Different personalities, if you will. Some can be quite playful. Some are more powerful than others. Some can be control and some cannot. They are very dangerous beings. Yes, there are spells, rituals, to summon them, and some can be made to serve, to aid one in reaching one's own ends. But I warn you again: they are very dangerous beings. They reflect all the blackness and evil in the collective soul of humanity, all its perverse desire and ambitions. They are restless and hungry and malevolent. They know no mercy or compassion. If I agree to help you, I cannot tell you which spirit you will summon. If it's one that cannot be controlled, or if the ritual goes wrong, you will almost certainly die horribly. I would advise you to pray, but that would be absurdly hypocritical, wouldn't it? Not to mention you're not a man of faith, as you've already stated.
She stops, staring at him. He waits for her to continue. Eventually, she does.
Thirty years ago, my sect attempted to summon one such spirit. I won't disclose for what purpose or what objective we hoped to accomplish. It...didn't go well. It was a disaster. A dozen people died. Including my husband. We told the police one of our followers went insane and attacked us. We knew better than to tell them the truth.
I know. I read the article online.
That's how you found me.
Yes.
She nods, then begins to unbutton her blouse, taking the man by surprise. She spreads her blouse apart and he sees the long, wide scars, four parallel, running down between her breasts. Scars made by a set of claws. I myself barely survived. Do you understand the risk?
Yes.
And you still wish to proceed with it?
Yes.
She nods, more to herself than to him, and continues. The spirit itself, in its natural form has no real power. It can influence some people, but it needs a vessel, a body it can take for itself in order to gain substance and have strength.
She stands up and goes to one wall where an anonymous landscape print hangs. She removes the artwork, disclosing the face of a safe behind it. She dials in a combination, opens the safe and removes a book.
This was my husband's. As he was the head of our sect, it belonged to him and him only. The rest of us were forbidden from ever touching it. When he died, I became his successor, and it was passed down to me.
She crosses to the man and hands him the book which he regards. It appears ancient, bound in cracked dried-out leather. She takes it from him and opens it to a particular page, displaying it for him. Bizarre characters in a language he doesn't recall ever seeing. The ink is strangely unfaded and appears still fresh upon the ancient parchment.
This is the ritual you seek. I can't let you have the book, of course, but I can make a copy for you. Besides, I don't think you can read it anyway. I'll have to write a translation.
Will it still work?
Of course it will. The book itself is merely ink and paper. It has no power in and of itself. It's the words that are the conduit. You must follow the ritual precisely and overlook nothing. If you make even the slightest mistake, it will be the end of you.
She pauses. But it comes with a price.
I understand. He reaches into his jacket and withdraws a bulging manila envelope. Thirty thousand dollars, he says as he hands it to her. It was money from...her life insurance. It's all I have left. I have nothing else. Literally nothing. I have nothing to live for now. Except to make them pay. I swore to her I would. And after it's done, I'll probably take my own life. What's left of it.
That's not the only price.
He looks at her.
You have to be prepared to pay in blood as well.
What do you mean?
She doesn't answer. She goes to a drawer, takes out a notebook and pen, and begins to write a translation. He watches her, his sense of fear growing. A foreboding sense of impending doom. And damnation.

V

He removed a switchblade from the pocket of the leather jacket he wore. The blade popped out, extending with a snick. Gleaming cruel steel in the sodium street light. The leader brought the blade close to one of her wide, terrified eyes, nearly pricking it.
Help! The man screamed loudly, hoping there was someone, anyone within earshot who could hear him. Help us!
The leader turned away and stalked over to where the other two were holding him on his knees, one on either side, two arms clamped around each of his own. He kicked the man savagely in his stomach, knocking the air out of his lungs. He would have fallen forward if not for their arms holding him upright. Shut the fuck up! The leader shouted in his face, spraying him with spittle. Make another sound and I'll cut this bitch's eyes out and shove em down your fuckin throat!
He went back to where the fourth was holding the girl. He brought the blade back up to her eye, tracing it slowly, menacingly, down her trembling cheek, down her throat, bringing it to the top button of her blouse. Flick. The first button flew off, plinking softly to the pavement. Flick. The next button was cut. Then the next. When all the buttons were gone, he used the blade to part the blouse, revealing the white lace of her bra.
He inserted the blade between the cups of the bra and yanked it forward, severing the material. He shoved the bra aside, displaying her breasts. Nice! Not too big and not too small. Just the way I like em. You got good taste here, hoss, he called over his shoulder to the man. He groped her breasts brutally. She whimpered. Her eyes looked over his shoulder to the man down on his knees. They pleaded with him silently for help.
He struggled uselessly. Don't touch her! he yelled, knowing it would accomplishment nothing apart from earning him another blow, which is did, delivered by one of the two who briefly released his grip on the man's arm.
Feel nice, too! Think I'll have me a little taste while I'm at it. He put his mouth first to one breast, then the other, suckling with obscene wet sounds. She cried out in pain as he suddenly bit hard.
He stepped back, wiping his mouth. Sorry darlin, guess I got carried away. The man could see saliva gleaming on her nipples. The left one was bleeding. He could see the teeth marks imprinted deeply around it.
The leader hiked up her skirt with one hand and reached between her thighs with the other. The sound of fabric ripping and her panties were torn free. He bunched them up and brought them to his nose, inhaling deeply. Mmmm! Sweet thang, you smell like you're rarin to go! Guess I got your motor goin with our foreplay.
He tossed her torn panties aside. His hands unbuckled his belt, undid the snap of his jeans, unzipped the fly.
She realized what was about to happen and started to scream. The one holding her clamped one hand over her mouth, muffling it. He pulled her head back.
The leader grinned with hellish glee as he lowered his jeans. It's...showtime, folks!
He stops at an ATM and withdraws what little cash remains in his checking account. He checks into a cheap motel off the interstate under a false name. He sits on the bed staring blankly at the TV he hasn't bothered to turn on. He contemplates the past, present, future. His expression is somber.
In another lifetime, he reflects, he had never been so serious. Quite the opposite. He had been lighthearted bordering on irreverent. He recalls one of the few arguments they had had. Is everything always a joke with you? she had demanded. He smiles bitterly at the memory. You should see me now, babe, he thinks.
He takes out and unfolds the sheets torn from the notebook and begins to read. Halfway through the second page he sees what's written there and reacts with a jerk. A hitch in his breath. He lowers the paper with a hand that shakes. He sits there, deep in thought. Considering the nature of his own character. He remembers her words.
You have to be prepared to pay in blood.
He rereads the handwritten words. There is a step that must be taken. There is a boundary that must be crossed. He's not sure if he can. Part of him reels with horror at the thought. Some small inner voice in a part of him not yet dead protests shrilly. He sits there, torn, undecided. Fleetingly, he considers ripping up the pages and flushing them down the toilet.
He remembers her sad-eyed smile. The way her cheeks dimpled.
He sees her pleading, terrified eyes.
He sees his smirking face.
He quells that inner voice, smothering it into eternal silence. He will do what he must.
He goes to a retail store and uses the last of his money to buy the items he needs. He brings his purchases back to the room. Using his phone, he finds the number of a local escort service. He starts to dial, stops, and then uses the bedside phone to call.
I want a girl. I don't care what color. No, I don't care what color her hair is either. I just need her to be young. I repeat: young. The youngest you've got. And preferably fresh, if you understand what I mean. I'll pay extra. All right. He gives them the address of the motel, his room number and the name he signed on the register.
Forty-five minutes later there is a knock at his door. A young girl stands there in a short sequin dress. She has curly red hair and pale, freckled skin. Pretty in a flawed, inexperienced way. She doesn't look older than seventeen. He can tell immediately that she hasn't been doing this for long.
Hi! Are you Jerry?
Yes I am.
You called about a date?
Yes I did. Please come in. He glances out the door as she passes, scanning. A taxi is pulling away from the motel. There is no one around. No one to see. It is nearly dark. He closes the door behind her, locking it.
I'm Katie. She glances around. Nice place you got here.
I'm just staying here on business.
So what are you into? I'm open to just about anything.
I want you to take a bath.
She stares at him. A bath?
Yes.
With you?
No. By yourself. While I watch.
That's it?
Yes.
She shrugs. Whatever floats your boat, she says with a slight, sly grin. Without further ado she peels off her dress. She has no underwear on. Her body is slim, compact, quite lovely. Her breasts small but well shaped.
She steps past him into the bathroom where he has already prepared the tub with warm water. She climbs in and sits down. What now? You wanna watch me touch myself?
No, just lie down and make yourself comfortable. Like you're taking a normal bath.
She lies back, resting against the head of the tub, relaxing. She is submerged up to her shoulders. This feels nice.
He sits on the toilet beside her, watching her. One of his hands creep surreptitiously around his back. You're new to this whole thing, aren't you?
You mean having guys watch me take a bath?
No, I mean being an escort.
What's it to you? she asks shortly.
I'm just curious. If I offended you, I apologize.
She shrugs. None taken. I guess I'm still pretty new. I just started this week. Her face is suddenly open. Tragically vulnerable. You're only my third customer, if you can believe it. She is looking straight ahead.
His hand grasps the handle of the butcher knife he purchased earlier. Tucked under his pants. I'm so sorry, he tells her softly.
She looks at him. Confused. What?
The knife is out. Before she can react, he shoves it forward, deep into her throat. Her eyes widen in shook. She emits a gagging, gurgling sound. She thrashes around in the tub, water churning. Some of it splashes out. He withdraws the knife, blood spurting from the wound. He watches as she dies. Her thrashing lessens. She stops gurgling. The shocked, uncomprehending, horrified look in her eyes changes to a dull look of fatigue. Her eyes slowly close. Her body goes still.
He sits back against the toilet tank, the butcher knife falling from his numb, loose fingers, clattering to the tiled floor. He thinks he's going to vomit. He begins to shake, begins to hyperventilate. He stands impulsively and exits the bathroom. He sits on the bed, rocking back and forth. He is dimly aware that he is weeping. All the tears he has been holding back since that night. Tears he could never bring himself to shed for her.
An eternity passes. His composure returns. Something in him turns to stone. He stands, resolved, and reenters the bathroom. She is lying in the tub with her head to one side, arms floating limply. Her blood has merged with the water, tinting it red.
He gets started, taking the items out of his shopping bag one by one. He places the short black candles along the rim of the tub, using a tape measurer to make certain they are each exactly six inches apart. He takes out a jar of salt and sprinkles a thin line of it between the candles, connecting them. he removes the barbeque lighter from the bag and lights the candles one by one in the sequence specified in the woman's instructions. Next he picks up the butcher knife, still wet with her blood, and slashes his own palm, dripping his blood into the tub. he binds his hand, then takes out the sheets of note paper.
He speaks, intoning precisely. I am one in need of succor. I am one who seeks patronage from a profane spirit. I am one who calls for this profane spirit to do my bidding. I have made a sacrifice in your name. I have shed innocent blood in your glory. O spirit, favor me and come forth.
He begins to recite the phonetic pronunciation of the words the woman had translated. Alien words in a language he doesn't recognize. Words that mean nothing to him.
The air in the room begins to change. Grow heavy and electric. The light seems to dim. He detects a faint smell, something he can't place. Unpleasant. He becomes filled with a frightened yet at the same time eager sense of anticipation. He can feel something coming. He senses a presence in the room with him. Something he cannot see. Something just beyond human perception.
A voice speaks. Low, sibilant, seemingly sexless. It seems to come from all around him. He seems to hear it speaking within his own mind.
Why have you called me here? What purpose do you wish me to serve?
Revenge.
What do you require?
I want four men to die. I want them to die horribly and to suffer before they do. In exchange, you may have their souls. I want them to suffer eternally.
That is not enough. I require more than their souls.
What do you want?
Before I help you, you must pledge yourself to me. You will be bound to me for eternity.
He doesn't answer. He seems to think it over.
Answer me. Now. Time grows short. I grow impatient.
Yes. I'm already in hell. Whatever you do to me can be no worse than what I already endure.
Very well. Give me the names of those who have wronged you. And present me with their images.
He reaches into his back pocket and produces a folded sheaf of papers. Photocopies he made at the library. Mugshots that had appeared recently in the newspapers. He holds out the first. An overweight man with a goatee. Maxwell Rhodes.
Next.
A mugshot of a thin, wiry man with stringy long hair, one eye off-center. Robert Tate.
Next.
A mugshot of a sunken-faced man with a mullet and a teardrop tattoo beneath one eye. Thomas Boyette.
Next.
The last one. A young, muscular man with a shaved head. A bandage across his nose. Looking at the camera with casual, almost bored insolence. Dale Thorton. I have one condition that must be met.
Speak.
He must suffer the most. And before he dies, I want him presented to me. I want to watch.
Agreed.
It can be done?
Yes. And so it shall.
The voice falls silent.
A point of bluish light appears in the air over the tub. It grows from a pinprick to the size of a golf ball. Then to a basketball. Then to a beachball. It swirls and shimmers with whitish radiance. The man can see a form taking shape within. It is unspeakable. He has to look away.
The ball of blue shimmering light shrinks, then disappears.
The red-tinted water in the bathtub begins to bubble as if boiling. The dead girl stirs ever so slightly. Her fingers twitch. Her eyes flutter. As the man watches, the wound in her throat closes, healing. She opens her eyes. They are a fiery orange-red color. She opens her mouth and her teeth are long pointed spikes. She smiles hideously. Slowly stands up, dripping water and blood.
She smiles her pointy smile at the man, her eyes blazing. He shudders despite himself.
It has begun, she - it - says, its voice the voice of the thing. Remove the barrier.
He sweeps aside the candles and salt. It steps out of the tub, walking past the man. He watches as it enters the other room, dressing in the girl's clothes. Then it opens the door and walks out into the night.

VI

The fat redneck sits alone in front of the stage, watching the naked girl twirl around the chrome pole. The DJ is playing a modern rock song, which the fat redneck hates. Occasional yells and catcalls from the other men seated around and behind him. He polishes off his beer, wipes his goatee, then gestures for a fresh one from a passing waitress. He sighs.
Being at a strip club by himself always makes him feel strangely uncomfortable and self-conscious. Even a little embarrassed. He had tried to get the others to come with him, but Dale had been in a sullen mood for the past couple days since the Sheriff had paid his unexpected visit. He had told the fat redneck to fuck off. Him and Bobby was goin drinkin at the Stetson. And Tom Boy had a date with a sixteen-year-old part-time waitress from the café. He'd been trying to put the moves on Becky Lynn Meeks since she'd begun working at the Red Apron two months before. Tonight, he'd hoped to score. That was actually the word he had used: score. Like he was still some dumbass horny high school kid - not that Tom Boy had been in high school for very long before dropping out - instead of a man pushing nearly thirty. Fuckin numbnuts. He personally hopes Tom Boy strikes out big with Miss Meeks and maybe even get a knee in his groin for his troubles. A man his age has no business with a girl that young anyway.
So here he is, sitting by himself at nine-thirty on a Thursday night because he quite frankly doesn't have fuck-all else to do and can't think of anything better than to sit and insert dollar bills in the G-strings of pretty girls who smile and pretend to flirt when he can tell they really couldn't care less about him and are even maybe a little disgusted by him and his weight. He vaguely wishes that Roxanne was working that night. Roxanne is one of the few dancers at the club who might be willing to give him something extra in the VIP room for the right amount of money - maybe even a blowjob.
Besides, he has money to burn. It was payday. They had finished distributing the merchandise to Dale's crew of "salesmen". Next week, the Russian will have another shipment ready for them and the process will begin again. Dale always pays his lieutenants well - that is what he calls them, his lieutenants.
A female voice speaks from beside him. Hi, there!
He turns. A pretty redheaded girl with freckles sits there. She seems to have materialized out of nowhere. She wears a short sequin dress. She smiles at him. A friendly smile.
He looks at her, looks around, looks back to her. You talkin to me?
Well who else do you think I'd be talking to? You see anyone else close by? She laughs sweetly. Her voice is like the tinkling of bells.
I think you're confusin me for someone else, ma'am.
No I'm not. You're Max Rhodes, right?
How you know my name?
You're a friend of Dale's, right?
Yeah...?
I'm his cousin. Katie. You don't remember me?
He racks his memory. He comes up blank. No, can't say I do.
Well, it's been a couple years. I was a lot younger back then.
So what you doin here now?
I actually just had an audition here.
You're gonna be a stripper?
I hope. I was just on my way out and thought I recognized you.
You sure you're old enough to be in here, missy? You don't look like you's even outta high school yet.
She leans in close, her voice a conspiratorial whisper. Well, I won't say nothing if you won't.
He grins a little.
I was actually hoping maybe you could buy me a drink. I'm not quite old enough to do it myself. Her tone becomes coquettish. Or maybe we could go back to your place for a drink.
He stares at her in frank disbelief. You wanna go back with me?
Why not? You're kinda cute.
Ah, come on. You're puttin me on. I know I ain't much to look at.
I kinda have a thing for big guys. So how about it? Don't worry. I won't tell Dale.
He looks down at where the hem of her sequin dress ends halfway up her thighs. He feels a stirring in his crotch. He can't believe this is happening. Sure. Why the hell not?
His rusted Dodge pickup pulls up the dirt driveway and stops outside the two-room shack with the corrugated metal roofing he calls home just past ten-fifteen. His shack sits on a small overgrown lot just off the highway. There isn't another house around for nearly a mile. He unlocks the padlock on the door and opens it for her. She enters and looks around. He is somewhat embarrassed by the mess. She doesn't seem to notice.
He takes a beer out of the tiny fridge in the small alcove that serves as his kitchen. So you still want that drink?
She shrugs. Actually, I was thinking we could get right down to the fucking, then worry about the drink, she says matter-of-factly. Before he can react, her dress is already off and on the floor. She stands before him nude. His heart is thudding. He feels his penis extending out like a telescope. Damn, little girl, you cut right to the chase.
She smiles thinly at him. For a second her eyes seem to flash red, but it's probably just his imagination. Take off your clothes, she instructs.
In his bedroom, porn mags scattered around. Centerfolds on the walls. He is on his sagging, stained mattress, the girl atop him, kissing him. He cups her small breasts. She pulls away. Smiles coyly. I have an idea. Something that could make this a little more fun. You have any rope here?
Why?
I'm going to tie your arms up. It'll make it more exciting.
Damn missy, you're a wild one, ain't you?
You have no idea.
There's some clothesline under the sink. In the other room.
She leaves, then returns less than a minute later with the clothesline. She ties his arms to the headboard above him.
Back on top, she resumes kissing him. She moves her head down, kissing his neck, moving down to his plump chest. She kisses one of his nipples. Bites it lightly. He moans. The pressure intensifies. A pinch of pain. Ow! Watch it girl, go easy! She bites down harder. He yells out louder than before. Dammit, I said cut that out, it hurts!
She bites deeply, then rips her head savagely to the side. She spits out his nipple. He screams and looks down in horror at the bleeding wound.
She raises her head to him. She has changed. The shriveled, rotting face of an old hag leers at him. Her eyes are a fiery orange red. She smiles and her mouth is shark-like and lined with long, pointed fangs. I like it rough, it hisses at him, its voice unnaturally low. Its reeking breath hits his face. It is the stench of maggoty, bloated roadkill that has lain by a roadside for days in the hot sun.
He thrashes in a panic, trying to pull his arms free. Get off me! Let me go!
But we're just getting started, it croons hideously. Its rakes the claws its hands have become down his chest, leaving deep gashes in his skin. He screams again.
It suddenly plunges one of its claws into his bloated stomach and pulls out his intestines. It coils his guts up beside the bed. He emits a blood-curding howl. His eyes roll back in their sockets. He spasms.
I'll be right back, lover. It stands and leaves the bedroom. He lies there groaning, in shock but still alive, his intestines piled on the floor but still attached to him. Dimly, he hears it open the front door and go outside. Some time passes before it reenters the bedroom. In one hand it holds a pair of jumper cables from his truck. In the other, it effortlessly holds the fifty-pound battery of the truck itself. It grins at him.
Now we're really going to have some fun, it tells him.
His screams last long into the night.
​

Throwaway account bc I really don’t want her seeing this.
Putting this up top bc I am in capable of being concise and I think most of this is relevant info to help see into my moms mindset.
TLDR: I think my mom might have lied to her friend about having cancer to get attention from her ex and now they’re married. Her “cancer” journey was kept a complete secret from myself and all our friends and family that aren’t connected to her ex until her friends slipped up in front of me.
My (27F) parents (both 56) have been divorced since I was in kindergarten but are still great friends and were a wonderful co-parenting team my whole life (they even still text each other on their anniversaries and all that jazz). My dad is a serial monogamist and has always been in back to back long term relationships whereas my mom chose to stay singularly focused on me. I literally remember her going on one single date from when I was 6 up until I was 21.
I went away to college (not too far, just an hour or so, but far enough that I lived on campus and didn’t consistently come home on the weekends), leaving my mom living by herself for the first time roughly 25 years. She’s close with our family and always had great friends that were always around when I was kid, so it’s not like she was completely isolated after I left. But my senior year of college when my she was 49 I guess she finally said enough was enough and decided to put herself back out there. She got laid off from her job (this was not financially devastating, my mom has always been money savvy and had a great job plus they gave her a years severance) so she took the year to completely focus on herself. She had lost around 150lbs the year prior, got a tummy tuck, and hit the dating apps. She never introduced me to any of her dates, mainly bc there wasn’t anyone really serious and I wasn’t home a lot, but my cousins/her friends met a few bc my (her) house has always had an open door policy with people coming and going as they pleased with little to no warning. I did always hear her wild dating stories (she put me and my friends to SHAME) about guys taking her out on boats, spontaneously proposing marriage, the whole nine yards.
It was all very light hearted until she met this one guy, let’s call him Matt (same age as my mom), towards the end of her “year of fun”. She was INFATUATED with this guy and it was very clear from the first time she called to tell me about him. I found it very odd since he was from way out of state (a plane ride away, not just a long drive) and the only reason they met was when he was in the area on business so it’s not like they got to spend a ton of time together and my mom is a lovely woman but she’s definitely a tad on the needy side. I mentioned all her friends and support systems earlier on because I really don’t think this was a case of her being lonely and latching on to someone just for the sake of it, there was something about this guy that had her hooked.
They were constantly on again off again, always him breaking up with her. When I eventually met him the guy really wasn’t anything to write home about, good or bad, and they broke up shortly after so I didn’t think much of it.
The next time I met Matt after they got back togethr a little over a year later we got along much better and I actually started to like the guy, so I’m willing to admit that the first meeting not going super well may have been my fault. He still lived out of state but my mom had gotten a remote job, so she was doing a lot of traveling back and forth between his home and ours.
Eventually I went out there to visit them for Memorial Day weekend, as Matt lived right on the beach. One morning I went paddle boarding with Matt’s best friend’s wife, we can call her Lisa, who was one of my mom’s only friends up there. They met the first time my mom and Matt started dating and had kept in touch even through all the breakups and the relationship she had in year plus her and Matt were broken up. I was excited bc I’ve always been close with my moms friends back home, going as far as going to dinner with them and hanging out at their house or having them over even when she was out of state, so I assumed this would be like that. I do feel the need to preface this with the fact that this woman is definitely a shit stirrer with absolutely no regard for any potential trouble she may start.
While we were out there she asked how my moms recovery was going and I was confused bc I initially thought she was talking about the tummy tuck which had happened years ago at this point, although she did have a long complicated recovery. I said as much but Lisa said “no, I’m talking about the cancer” at which point I nearly fell off my board. I asked what she was talking about and she said that my mom has had two different types of cancer in the past two years. I has heard nothing about any of this. This is where Lisa’s gossip-y nature may come into play though, because she also told me that after his last breakup Matt said he was “only dating rich chicks” from now on and that she was worried about my mom since she does really well for herself, like I mentioned earlier, and obviously wasn’t in the greatest of health given her two separate bouts of cancer. She was clearly trying to imply that Matt got back together with my mom in hopes of getting himself into the will of a well off woman allegedly riddled with cancer. I had heard Matt make comments about not really believing in leaving stuff set aside for your kids in your will (he has 3 all in their 20s) because you earned everything you have and they should have to as well. I don’t particularly take issue with this train of thought and I wouldn’t want my mom to ever budget her life just to leave me something when she’s gone. If there’s money left, great, if she burns it all down then that’s her prerogative, but coupled with what Lisa said to me it made me think twice about why he was saying things like that.
Here’s where I think my mom may be lying. When I got back to the house after the paddle board ride from hell I obviously confronted my mom. She told me then that she had uterine and kidney cancer and had had two surgeries, one for each cancer. She said one surgery was a hysterectomy and the other was a laparoscopic procedure to remove a mass on her kidney. She also said that this was the reason she had stayed with her last boyfriend for so long despite knowing it wasn’t the relationship for her, as she really needed the support system while going through treatment while I was still at college. I asked why she didn't rely on her friends and she told me that no one, friend or family, back home knew she had been sick. My mom is NOT the strong and silent type. If she's sick or hurt she has always been the person to milk it for all it's worth and has never had any issue asking her people for help, so this really struck me as odd. I asked her doctors name and she told me, I looked him up and found his clinic where we’re from so that checked out.
Eventually I told her I needed a minute so I went for a walk outside. I called my dad and asked if he had heard anything about this, he hadn’t. He did say that a laparoscopic surgery to remove a renal mass was the exact surgery he had around the same time my mom allegedly did, so that was kind of random. I remembered him having that surgery and I remember exactly what the scar from it looked like since it was actually a cluster of small scars he used to joke looked like a baby shark bite. My mom and I had been working out together after the time this was all supposed to have happened, so I saw her in just a sport bra frequently and the only scar she has is from her tummy tuck, definitely nothing distinctive like what my dad has.
Randomly a couple hours later my phone stopped working, so my mom gave me hers to try and call AT&T to sort it out. When I opened the browser on her phone the page for the oncologist she told me she was seeing popped up, as if she had just been looking at it while we were talking earlier.
The reason I’m wondering if she made the whole thing up is because why would she tell only one of her friends and coincidentally the one that was connected to Matt? I think she told Lisa in hopes that Matt would hear about it and reach out to her to check in. Clearly it worked, because they’re married now and have been for three years. I honestly love Matt and he’s been such a great step father to me, so I’m no longer super concerned about the potential financial motivations Lisa implied when she first told me all this. Sometimes I forget all of this even happened but then I remember all the weird details that don’t add up and spiral down the same rabbit hole I did four years ago. Am I crazy?

Laughing my ass off
​
This beat doesn't need a drop
Thank son but I will bite your ear lob
(Thank you son = TYson, bite ear)
​
(beat change)
Oh you screaming in pain
They said no pain no gain
These nuts need to be drain💀
On ur mom like tropical rain💀
Then my niggas on her will run a train💀
I am not the one to blame
It's on you, you cuck, shame shame
​
Eww ain't the right gesture,
I need a music video director
Oldies don't give me a lecture
Will hit you and give a pelvis fracture💀
Got rounded shoulder than dexter
(bodybuilding who injected synthetic to his shoulders)
Not a stripper still better moves than Jackson,
You dont know my clan
Nigga we
Absolutely cooler than kelvin
(calvin klein and nothing cooler than absolute zero which was termed by kelvin)
​
That hoe got a nice pelvis
I got only one wish
She better nicely washes the dish
And then I gotta throw her in a ditch💀
​
Ahh hell na (meme sound)
​
I told ya brahh
That girl needs no bra
She's flatter than earth
And got no girth
Like pitch on perth(place in australia)
Surrounded by sharks (entrepreneur pitch on shark tank previous line)
Like night of new moon dark
They call me Stark
But son u just a pony
(Pony stark)
With me don't get phony
Cuz my ass is lonely😭

So I heard that this character was supposed to be trans, and there are several factors in show that support that. In one scene in episode 10 we can see what appears to be a sports bra under her shirt that looks like it's trans flag colored, and in the next episode I think it was, they prominently frame a plush shark (presumably a blahaj) when we're in her bedroom. My problem is that everything in her story in the season, including her conversations with Kaoru (a trans-man) seem to indicate the opposite. She was born female (unless I'm sorely mistaken), but is commonly perceived as a man. She seems to be upset by this at almost every turn, wanting to be seen as a woman. Did I sorely misread her story? Or was it just badly presented? Any insights would be appreciated.

Wrestling history is filled with matches and events that aren't well-liked. Some of them have faded into relative obscurity, while others have reached incredible levels of infamy. I thought it would be fun to take a look back at some of these cards to relive the moments we all wish we could forget and rehash the ones that we blotted out of our collective memories.
My source for this list is Cagematch, an IMDB-like site for wrestling. Its users can share their ratings on promotions, events, and even individual matches.
If this sort of thing is your cup of tea, I recently took a look at the events that Cagematch deemed the worst in history. Did you want to see WWE's 20 worst events?. Or maybe WCW's 20 worst events?. Or maybe the 15 worst outside of the world of WWE & WCW? You've got options.
This time, I'm looking at WWE matches. Some of these are ones that are easily thought of as bad, while others may be a bit more obscure. And maybe, just maybe, a couple of these might actually be... not terrible? Let's find out together.
Ratings accurate as of February 13, 2024, and are on a scale from 0 to 10
#20: The Beverly Brothers vs The Bushwhackers Royal Rumble 1992 (Jan 19, 1992) - 0.80
The Bushwhackers were living Saturday morning cartoons in the ring, a trait that was on full display here. The first third of the match is almost entirely Luke and Butch playing to the crowd. The Beverlys play pantomime villains, including a spot where the brothers take turns sneaking up on - and running away from - the New Zealanders.
The managers get in on the “fun” as well, with “The Genius” Lanny Poffo seconding the Beverlys and loveable(?) loser Jamison in the corner of the Bushwhackers. The segment ends with Luke and Butch knocking out the victorious Beverlys, holding The Genius to allow Jamison to kick him in the shin, and the trio of faces doing the signature Bushwhacker march.
FlaiSteamboat this wasn't.
—
#19: Giant Gonzalez vs The Undertaker WrestleMania IX (Apr. 4, 1993) - 0.74
The Undertaker makes his first of four appearances on this list with this, the most infamous match of his legendary WrestleMania win streak. This one was ugly from the word go once Giant Gonzalez entered in a nude bodysuit. Nude refers to both the color and the design, which would pass for Attack On Titan cosplay today.
This match was never going to be a technical masterpiece, but even for a brawl this one was rough. Gonzalez was awkward in just about every way, and Taker was nowhere near the performer he would become. The end result is a lumbering bout that ends abruptly when Gonzalez smothers Taker’s mouth with a chloroform-dipped rag and gets disqualified.
Side note: In preparing for this piece I tried to pull up this match on Peacock. The app legitimately crashed each of the first three times I skipped to this particular match. Maybe the streaming gods were trying to tell me something.
—
#18: The Undertaker & Kane vs Triple H & Shawn Michaels Crown Jewel 2018 (Nov. 2, 2018) - 0.74
The Brothers of Destruction versus DX as the main event of Crown Jewel 2018 was a great idea on paper. The early shows under WWE’s 10-year deal with Saudi Arabia were light on long-term storyline impact but heavy on big names. Why not close one of those shows with two of the biggest dream teams in WWE history? Sure, they weren't exactly spring chickens - Triple H was the only participant under 50, and Michaels hadn't wrestled in over seven years - but they didn't have to put on a technical showcase. Just go out, pull out some of the greatest hits in a quick match, and send the crowd home happy.
The problem: The match lasted 28 minutes.
Particularly in the later stages of his career, Triple H matches were often seen as overly-long to the point of self-indulgence. This match did not help him beat those allegations. The match slowed to a crawl around the 15 minute mark, seemingly building to a crescendo that just never came. It just went on and on and on until it limped to an unsatisfying finish.
—
#17: Bam Bam Bigelow, Bastion Booger & The Headshrinkers vs Men On A Mission & The Bushwhackers (Survivor Series Match) Survivor Series 1993 (Nov. 24, 1993) - 0.74
What's worse than babyface Doink the Clown? Four babyface Doink the Clowns! What's worse than that? Four babyfaces pretending to be Doink!
Doink was set to captain a team against Bam Bam Bigelow at Survivor Series ‘93. Bigelow chose professional savages The Headshrinkers and professional gross man Bastion Booger as teammates. Doink opted to keep things close to the vest until the pay-per-view, only revealing that his team would be composed of four Doinks.
Imagine the joy on people's faces when Bushwhacker Luke rolled to the ring in on a scooter, followed by Bushwhacker Butch with a wagon, followed by all three members of Men On a Mission. All in Doink makeup. If that doesn't get your blood pumping, then are you even alive?
As for the match itself, it was more slapstick than showdown with no concern about which compete was the legal man. The first elimination (one of the Headshrinkers) came via water balloon. Bastion Booger was about to even the score but stopped his pin attempt to eat a banana and got pinned himself. The other Headshrinker was taken out after slipping on a banana peel. Even Vince McMahon couldn't help but say “this is a cartoon” as the entire team piled onto Bigelow to score the final fall.
—
#16: Seth Rollins vs The Fiend (Hell In A Cell Match) Hell In A Cell 2019 (June 10, 2019) - 0.74
One of the most common complaints about Hell In A Cell as an event is that there has to be a Cell match for whatever big feud going on at the time, regardless of whether the Cell match fits the story. That was never more true than in 2019, where Seth Rollins defended his Universal Championship against Bray Wyatt’s Fiend persona, which was as much of an unstoppable horror film villain as it was a wrestler.
Part of the appeal of the Cell match was that, while there would be chaos, somebody had to win. WWE didn’t want to put the title on The Fiend at that point, yet they also didn’t want The Fiend to lose in just his second televised match since Wyatt’s return to TV. So what do you do? You end a match designed to not end in a disqualification… with a disqualification.
Under red mood lighting, The Fiend and Rollins battled in a match where Rollins threw everything he had at his opponent and The Fiend shrugged it all off. Eventually we get to the ending sequence which consisted of, in no particular order:

• nine Stomps
• a Pedigree
• a Superkick
• seven weapon shots to The Fiend’s head
• three Fiend kickouts
• a partridge in a pear tree

Rollins eventually stacked a pile of junk on Fiend’s head and hit it with a sledgehammer, which was finally enough to earn a DQ loss.
—
#15: Ariel & Kevin Thorn vs Kelly Kelly & Mike Knox (Mixed Tag Match) ECW December to Dismember 2006 (Dec. 3, 2006) - 0.65
ECW December to Dismember is WWECW’s only brand-exclusive pay-per-view and, by most accounts, one of the worst in WWE history. Only two of the night’s six matches were announced beforehand - one of them didn’t even involve any ECW wrestlers - and it ended with WWE trying to cement a young Bobby Lashley as the brand’s top star ahead of fan favorites Rob Van Dam and CM Punk. It was so bad that Paul Heyman, the face of ECW, left the company two weeks later.
I write all of that to say this: The Ariel/Thorn vs Kelly/Knox match… was not terrible.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s not good. It’s arguably the worst contest of the night… but it’s not terrible. Nothing remarkably bad happens here, and it doesn’t overstay its welcome. Kevin Thorn and Mike Knox get things off to an unremarkable start, and Ariel maintains the same level in her half of the match. Kelly Kelly is clearly the weakest of the bunch, but that was to be expected of a 19-year-old with less than a handful of matches under her belt.
Had this happened on ECW on SciFi, this probably would have faded into obscurity in short order. But because it just happened to be on one of the worst shows ever, it lives in infamy.
—
#14: Sable vs. Tori WrestleMania XV (Mar. 28, 1999) - 0.60
This was not exactly the best in-ring debut in WWE history.
WrestleMania was Tori’s first match for the company. She debuted as a huge fan of WWE Women's Champion Sable, but soon set her sights on the title once Sable dismissed her and cast her aside. The irony is that Tori had years of experience wrestling in the US and Japan before coming to the Fed, while Mania XV marked the one-year anniversary of Sable’s first match.
Neither performer looked great here. There were two real big spots in this match (a pin reversal and a powerbomb counter) and neither one came off clearly. The stuff around those big moments looked rough as well. On top of that, Tori’s bodysuit looked bizarrely similar to that of Giant Gonzalez. Nothing really worked here.
—
#13: The Dudley Boyz vs The Undertaker (2-on-1 Concrete Crypt Match) Great American Bash 2004 (June 27, 2004) - 0.58
If you’re wondering what a Concrete Crypt match is, wonder no more. Paul Heyman and the then-tag-team-champions kidnapped Paul Bearer. They brought Bearer, strapped to a chair inside a plexiglass box, and a cement truck to the Bash. Heyman promised to drown Bearer in cement if the Dudleyz beat Taker. But once the match began, Heyman dumped more and more cement into the crypt every time Taker got an advantage, meaning that Bearer appeared to be screwed either way.
Eventually Bubby Ray got Heyman to stop adding concrete, insisting that he and D-Von could beat Taker without help, but not before the concrete got up to Bearer’s chest. Soon after, Taker won. The fiendish Heyman attempted to drown Bearer anyways, but he was stopped by a bolt of Taker lightning… only for Taker to say that he had “no other choice” and finish drowning Bearer in cement himself.
If you’re wondering why Taker killed off the guy whom he was fighting to save throughout the match... I can’t help you there.
—
#12: Alexa Bliss vs Bayley (Kendo Stick on a Pole Match) Extreme Rules 2017 (June 4, 2017) - 0.57
Bayley is on the short list of the best female performers in WWE history. Putting her in a feud with Alexa Bliss, whose Mean Girl-esque character work is second-to-none, should have led to magic. Instead, the end result was a feud so bad that it nearly destroyed Bayley’s WWE character.
The basis of the feud was that Bayley was too nice, too sweet, and too lame. She was supposedly incapable of possessing enough of a killer edge to take the Women’s Championship from Bliss, especially in a Kendo Stick on a Pole Match. That was a point that was driven home time and time again, especially in the disastrous “Bayley, This Is Your Life” segment that may be one of the worst segments in Raw history.
But once the match rolled around, all of Bliss’s talk about Bayley being too nice… proved to be completely true. Bayley had one chance to use the kendo stick on Bliss, but she hesitated to do so despite it being the entire point of the match. Bliss took advantage, repeatedly striking The Hugger with the stick and eventually picking up the win. And if you thought this would lead to Bayley refocusing and eventually overcoming her limitations, you’d be wrong. Once the bell rang in this match, she would not challenge for any singles title in a one-on-one match for the next two years.
—
#11: Goldberg vs The Undertaker Super ShowDown 2019 (June 7, 2019) - 0.56
Had the WWF and WCW found a way to work together to make a Goldberg/Undertaker match happen sometime around 1999, it would have been one of the most anticipated matches in history. But 20 years later, the potential dream match turned out to be a nightmare.
There were question marks around both men heading into the match. Goldberg was 52 and hadn’t wrestled in two years. The 54-year-old Taker had wrestled more recently, but his last outing was a poorly-received tag match that a) didn’t showcase The Deadman at his best and b) was #18 on this list. But if nothing else, they were performers. Even if it wasn’t a technical masterclass, the two absolutely could find a way to tell a good story and put on a compelling match… right?
Any hopes of a quality encounter were killed about 90 seconds into the bout, which is when Goldberg rammed his head into a turnbuckle post and got concussed.
‘Da Man clearly struggled for the rest of the encounter, particularly in the closing moments when he attempted to hit a Jackhammer on Taker but nearly ended up dropping him on his head instead. He bungled an attempted Tombstone as well, which led to Taker simply hitting a chokeslam and bringing things to a merciful end.
—
#10: Braun Strowman vs Tyson Fury Crown Jewel 2019 (Oct. 31, 2019) - 0.53
Tyson Fury is a boxer, and a very good one at that. He’s an undefeated heavyweight champion, and he might be a few months away from becoming the first undisputed heavyweight champion in nearly 25 years. He’s big (6’9”, 265lb), strong, surprisingly athletic, charismatic, and possesses a larger-than-life personality. He not might not be a professional wrestler by trade but he could have been one in another life, so it was no surprise when he decided to step into a WWE ring to compete against Brawn Strowman.
Fury was largely able to hold up his end of the bargain, but he did show some awkwardness and inexperience at times. The most egregious was when he missed his cue to charge at Strowman, staring at the Monster Among Men for about 15 seconds until he figured out what he needed to do. It was one mistake, but it was a blatant and obvious one that stuck in a lot of people’s memories and made the match look bad.
Was it great? No. Was it terrible though? Honestly, I don’t think so. In fact, depending on how you felt about the Cain Velazquez/Brock Lesnar bout that opened the card and was constructed to look like a UFC fight, it might not have been the worst wrestler-versus-combat-sport-star match of the night.
—
#9: John Cena vs John Laurinaitis (No Disqualification Match) Over The Limit 2012 (May 20, 2012) - 0.49
John Laurinaitis was seen as a villain in some corners of wrestling fandom due to his real-life role as WWE’s Executive Vice President of Talent Relations. He became a villain in the more traditional sense when he became a villainous on-screen General Manager of both SmackDown and Raw. This led to a rivalry with WWE’s biggest hero, John Cena. Laurinaitis booked himself as Cena’s opponent at Over The Limit with plans to screw Cena over, but the tables were turned when the Board of Directors dictated that anyone helping Johnny Ace would be fired - as would Laurinaitis himself if he lost the match.
The 17-minute match largely consisted of Cena toying with the overmatched 50-year-old GM but refusing to finish him off. It was never going to be great - and it wasn’t - but at least it was going to be cathartic to see the villain get what was coming to him before being bested. But even that was taken away when the recently-fired Big Show brought an escaping Laurinaitis back to the ring, knocked out Cena, and allowed Johnny Ace to pick up the win. And to make matters worse, the impact of the match was undercut when Laurinaitis lost his on-screen role anyways at the next month’s pay-per-view.
—
#8: Lucha House Party vs Lars Sullivan (3-on-1 Handicap Match) Super ShowDown 2019 (June 7, 2019) - 0.48
There were a lot of factors that contributed to this match being rated so poorly.
Part of it is the booking. It’s hard for heroes to take a numerical advantage and make their win look noble, yet that’s what the Lucha House Party were trying to do. The trio of luchadors had been on the receiving end of attacks from Lars Sullivan over the past few weeks, so this was their chance to fight back. Were they heroes for taking on the big bully, or villains for fighting a wrestler three-on-one?
Part of it is the finish. After being on the receiving end for most of the match, LHP did away with any thought about competing and just ganged up on Sullivan, earning a disqualification. The move didn’t exactly make the luchadors look valiant.
Part of it is the participant, Lars Sullivan. After weeks of destroying heroes in post-match attacks, this was Sullivan’s first official match since being called up from NXT. However, there were already calls from some fans to release Sullivan thanks to unearthed posts he made on a bodybuilding forum. Those posts included disparaging comments about Black people and Muslims, praise for a White Nationalist music group, a thank you to Stephanie McMahon for a ‘fap vid,’ and claims that Kofi Kingston and R-Truth looked like prison gang members. Sullivan apologized for his comments, paid a six-figure fine, and attended sensitivity training. He would suffer an injury a few weeks after this match and, aside from a three-week run the following year, would not appear on WWE television again.
—
#7: Asuka vs Carmella (with James Ellsworth in a Shark Cage) Extreme Rules 2018 (July 15, 2018) - 0.48
Whenever you have a champion who hangs on to their title by hook and by crook, they have to find ways to constantly get one over on the good guys. At best, this can make the heel look cunning and conniving. At worst, this can make the face look like an idiot. Extreme Rules '18 provided a good example of the latter.
Much of Carmella’s Smackdown Women’s Championship reign came thanks to assistance from James Ellsworth. Ellsworth was even the person who handed Carmella the Money in the Bank briefcase for the win in the first ever Women’s Money in the Bank match. In an attempt to curb the interference of Mr. No Chin Music, Ellsworth was to be locked in a shark cage above the ring for Carmella’s defense against Asuka.
In the early part of the bout, James tossed a couple of items down to ‘Mella to help her, but both attempts were quickly sussed out. Asuka then took out Carmella outside the ring while Ellsworth tried to escape and got hung upside-down by his ankle. Instead of dragging Carmella into the ring and finishing the fight with Ellsworth clearly incapacitated, Asuka dished out some kicks and strikes to the hanging man. She focused so much on James that Carmella was able to sneak up behind her, shove her into the cage wall, and cover her for a three count and a successful defense.
—
#6: Eric Bischoff vs Teddy Long Survivor Series 2005 (Nov. 27, 2005) - 0.40
Both of the men who served as WWE’s on-screen General Managers in 2005 are Hall of Fame inductees, and rightfully so. Love him or hate him, Raw’s Eric Bischoff is someone who has made an incredible impact on the world of professional wrestling. SmackDown’s Teddy Long accomplished a hell of a lot over the course of a 30-year career.
But that doesn’t change the fact that this match featured two non-wrestlers who were in their 50s.
Bischoff used karate for his offense and it didn’t look great. Long used dancing for his offense, and it didn’t look great either. Bischoff tried to use the sash of his gi to choke Long and he almost missed. In fact, the one good looking move in the match was a pumphandle slam on Bischoff… hit by the interfering Boogeyman.
This, by the way, was the semi-main event. On a Big 4 pay-per-view.
—
#5: John Cena vs Michael Cole (No Disqualification Match) Monday Night Raw #993 (June 4, 2012) - 0.38
Just three weeks after lighting my eyes the world on fire against John Laurinaitis, John Cena was once again tasked with main eventing a show against a non-wrestler. This time around, there would be less in the way of clothes and more in the way of barbecue sauce.
GM Laurinaitis gave Cena the opportunity to name his opponent for this episode of Raw, barring himself and his new ally The Big Show. Cena chose Michael Cole after Cole had some choice words for the leader of the Cenation. But when the end of the show came, Johnny Ace played the ace up his sleeve: the Cena/Cole match would be a no-DQ encounter… but it would only take place if Cena could defeat Tensai. Somehow, Cena overcame the odds and earned the opportunity to smack Cole around.
This was clearly more of a segment than an actual match, but that didn’t make it any more enjoyable to watch. Cena stripped the Voice of WWE to his boxer briefs and forced Cole to apologize to both Jerry Lawler and Jim Ross. He then proceeded to douse Cole in JR’s barbecue sauce and spray him with a fire extinguisher. A brief bit of Tensai interference gave Cole a bit of hope, but in the end all he received was an Attitude Adjustment and a three-second tan.
—
#4: Tyson Tomko vs “The Mystery Woman” Steven Richards Unforgiven 2004 (Sep. 12, 2004) - 0.35
For weeks, Victoria received assistance in her matches from a mystery woman (a male performer in a shoddy wig and women's clothes). The mysterious person didn't interfere in Victoria's unsuccessful challenge for Trish Stratus’s Women's Title, but they did run in to prevent Trish ally Tyson Tomko from giving Victoria a post-match beatdown.
What followed was a segment that would spawn hundreds of think pieces if it were to happen today.
Tomko challenged the mystery woman to the ring for an impromptu match. The woman was instantly revealed to be Steven Richards, a former ally of Victoria. Tomko laid a beating on Richards, stripping him of his wig, dress, and bra over the course of a five-minute squash match. Richards’s only real offense started when he employed a claw grip of Tomko’s genitals.
—
#3: Goldust vs The Ultimate Warrior In Your House 7: Good Friends, Better Enemies (Apr. 28, 1996) - 0.30
Usually when a bout is called a nothing match, it usually means that the match contained nothing of any long-term significance. In this case, the match between Goldust and The Ultimate Warrior was a nothing match because the match contained nothing at all.
Intercontinental Champion Goldust suffered a knee injury at a house show the night before this pay-per-view. Rather than scrap the bout, WWF opted to try and work around the injury. Once Warrior hit the ring and the opening bell sounded, Goldust stepped out and waited… and waited… and waited. Warrior grabbed Goldy’s robe and chair and waited… and waited. Goldust eventually did return to the ring (not before threatening to kiss everyone in the crowd, however) only to leave again once Warrior connected with one clothesline. This time Goldust left and did not return, finally suffering a countout loss after nearly eight minutes. Warrior was left with no choice but to land a few shots on the random bodyguard (the former Mantaur in a mafioso suit) that was in Goldust’s corner for this match and only this match.
—
#2: Miss WrestleMania Battle Royal WrestleMania 25th Anniversary (Apr. 5, 2009) - 0.26
If WWE’s attitude towards women's wrestling could be distilled to a single segment, this would probably be it.
The only women's match on the Mania 25 card began with all 25 participants dancing on and around Kid Rock. This group included Maryse, who was the Divas Champion at the time. Instead of her belt being on the line, the women fought in a battle royal for a tiara, a sash, and the title of Miss WrestleMania. After a series of nondescript eliminations (including champion Maryse), the last woman standing was Santino Marella in drag.
The segment ended with a dance, because why the hell not.
—
#1: Jerry "The King" Lawler vs Michael Cole WrestleMania XXVII (Apr. 3, 2011) - 0.20
Every sentence in the following paragraph will contain at least one terrible idea.
In late 2010, lead commentator Michael Cole turned heel. He started a feud with his 61-year-old co-commentator, Jerry “The King” Lawler. The powers that be decided that this feud required a match at WrestleMania. Jack Swagger got looped into the feud as Cole's trainer. The Mania match lasted nearly 15 minutes, and the entire segment that contained the match went nearly 30. Lawler made Cole tap out, but the anonymous Raw General Manager reversed the decision due to bias from guest referee “Stone Cold” Steve Austin. This feud would continue across two more pay-per-views.

Author: FrostFireFive
<< < > >>
Book: Batman
Arc: Time Out
Set: 91
KACHOOOM!
The First National Gotham Bank was in flames as man dressed in a fine tuxedo and red cloak exited the fire with several goons behind him. No one could see his face behind the featureless ruby red helmet that obscured whoever the leader of the Red Hood gang was. He looked down at his watch, three minutes to midnight, and everything was finally going right.
“I thought you said you found us a ride!” One of the Red Hood gang members said as he struggled to carry one of the larger bags filled with bearer bonds.
“Shut up man, you know the boss has a plan,” Another one of the gang said. “But seriously where’s the car?”
“Car? When did I ever say car?” The Red Hood smiled as the sounds of a helicopter could be heard above. He had managed to secure Nygma’s services for this one. For someone who loved stupid puzzles, he could provide logistics in a way the other brokers in New Gotham. Ropes quickly fell down from the copter to pull the rest of the gang up and into the sky, away from prying eyes. “Only the best for all of you.”
“Nice,” One of the goons said as they grabbed the rope. “Supprised the Bat isn’t here yet. You’d think she’d noticed we blew a hole in the freakin’ First National.”
“She’s busy playing with a distraction I hired. Turns out fighting against a supposed crypto-fascist government requires money. And Peacemaker is a bull in a china shop compared to others,” Red Hood explained. “Besides, the Bat knows not to mess with me. Not after what I did to Gordon.”
“Heard he’s still breathing through a straw. And missing a leg. Did you really have to feed him to the sharks?” Another goon said as he strapped herself in.
“He was getting too close to my identity. And our strength is our secrets. They get out and we’re all just one big…joke,” The Red Hood leader explained. “Now let's get out of here and discuss shares on the ride.”
“On it boss,” One of the goons said as the four members clicked in and began moving upwards into the helicopter. The Red Hood waited a moment as the members of his gang rose twenty feet in the air the sound of knives cutting through the air could be heard as each rope snapped from the helicopter and the sound of cracking bone could be heard as the gang fell to the ground.
As they withered in pain, the Red Hood turned and saw a familiar grey and blue figure walk towards him in the rain. The yellow symbol glowed, shining a bat onto the Red Hood. His timing was off after all as Batwoman stood before him.
“You know you didn’t need to break their legs,” The Red Hood explained as he pulled out two red pistols. “You make a dramatic enough entrance as is.”
“And let you have the manpower advantage? Not a chance,” Batwoman explained as she held small batarangs in between her knuckles. Peacemaker had already given her trouble tonight, taking Wayne Medical hostage with her in it. Luckily he had a glass jaw, but still, the Dark Knight hated distractions, not when there were more important things to take care of.
“Well, no one ever said you never thought things through,” the Red Hood mumbled as he shot at Batwoman, his semi automatic pistols sending a barrage of bullets towards New Gotham’s savior.
Quickly, Batwoman flared her cape up as the bullets bounced off of them. Wayne Medical’s recent purchase of armored fabric for hospitals in war torn countries had found another use here in the states. As the bullets dropped to the ground, the Red Hood sprinted towards her, knife in hand as he sliced through the fabric of the cape and laid a solid punch to her stomach, sending her back winded.
“Clever cape, but one that can be cut if you know the right people, and have the right blade,” The Red Hood explained. “See Batwoman, you, much like the former two legged commissioner have been in my way for far too long. So I’ve decided to clean the house before finally getting some rest on a sandy beach.”
“All this destruction, maiming, and madness…was for you to retire?” Batwoman asked. “You’re insane!”
“No, just a realist. And frankly my dear, you don’t interest me at all,” The Red Hood said as he sliced the yellow oval of Batwoman’s suit, the knife crafted from some Atlantean/Kryptonian hybrid metal provided by Lawton.
“I didn’t know it was a popularity contest,” Batwoman mumbled. She looked at the Red Hood, he was well equipped, smart, and clearly prepared for this fight. But he had never felt the pain Batwoman had all those years ago, and how Martha Wayne forged herself through long nights cleaning up Gotham, with only Al’s training to begin with. He didn’t understand just what Martha Wayne had sacrificed to get here.
Quickly she got up and took a deep breath. The knife made the Red Hood confident, as if he was invincible because he had the right tool, but every cut he made left him open. And judging by the protective headgear, odds were he was protecting a glass jaw.
He kept slicing, tearing the body armor that protected Batwoman, but she didn’t flinch, even as the blood poured down.
“Why won’t you fall! I’ve cut you to swiss cheese at this point! Do something! Do anything! Make this a chal-”
KRACK!
Batwoman swung with a right hook, shattering the Red Hood’s helmet and sending him towards the ground. His brown hair and brilliant green eyes. Batwoman picked him up and looked at him for a moment. For a man who spent so much time trying to hide his identity, Batwoman couldn’t even place his face, he was just some guy, and no longer worth the attention as the police sirens could be heard. It was time to go back home, her work was done here.
…
The Gotham cemetery was well maintained for a site on the outskirts of town. The patrons of New Gotham had made sure that their dead would be memorialized in tombs built from stone. In a city of neon and glass, this was one of the few places that clung to tradition, as if it didn’t know the Gotham it memorialized had been dead and buried for years.
Tim Drake enjoyed the graveyard shift. Compared to the rest of his peers, he loved the quiet and the history that surrounded him. He may have fallen asleep in his first GU class because of the late hours, but he felt comfortable here. His peers were worried about the internship or club meetings, but Tim found it hard to care. He got good grades, he was already ahead in his programming final project. The trouble was he didn’t have a fire or passion for anything. And it was so easy to feel alone.
His flashlight illuminated the limestone and marble graves, the names of Dagget, Copplepot, even Beaumont told the story of Gotham and how it had fell. But as Drake’s flashlight bounced around, the light reflected back towards him, blinding him for a moment. Even after six months on the job he always forgot the large obsidian grave.
Quietly he moved to it, his hands tracing over the innate carving, done by one of the last stonecutters who made Gotham their home.
“Wayne,” Tim said as he looked at the markings.
Most of the graves in the cemetery usually had dirt or dust covering them, but the Wayne’s grave was pristine. The heavy and deep cuts of stone indicated that Thomas and Bruce had made this place their home. Tim had heard about them, everyone in New Gotham had, but they were distant, martyrs more than people at this point. And maybe that was for the best, without losing the heart of the Wayne family, maybe things would have been worse.
As Tim watched over the grave he could have sworn he had heard footsteps. Quiet steps along the gravel paths. But this was New Gotham, and it was supposed to be safe.
SHINK
Tim Drake didn’t feel the blade go through the heart as he dropped to the ground. A band of ninjas dressed in purple and blue armor moved from the shadows. Two of them had shovels and began digging at the ground. One of the other ninja’s pulled the communicator from their belt and spoke clearly as the rain began to fall.
“We have the body. We will return soon.”
…
“Ow,” Martha Wayne said as she stitched her own wounds in the mirror. The penthouse suite in Wayne Tower was considered once the place to be to bump elbows with Gotham’s high society. It was a simpler time, with Thomas regalling people with tales of his work in the DA’s office. Putting away Boss Thorne and Marroni had made him a hero in so many people’s eyes. And Martha, in a resplendent gown holding a smaller gathering, explaining the importance of affordable medical supplies and treatments. Thomas protected the people, but Martha wanted to help them.
It was a promise she had kept for thirty years at this point. After the alley it was all she had at this point. With the press using her tragedy, her Bruce, to spur on an era of supposed peace. Pax Gothana it had been called. The biggest public works, crime, and social program reform occurred because of the influence Martha had wielded. She could have been Mayor, even a Senator at this point. But that was Thomas’ dream, not hers. And that was beyond the fact that someone had to protect this New Gotham from the shadows.
But Martha Wayne wasn’t getting any younger, at 63, it was becoming harder and harder to ignore the signs of her slowing down. Someone like the Red Hood couldn’t even slice the Batwoman when she was at her peak, she had taken down the Mad Monk, Hugo Strange, even The Charlatan.
“You know, trying to stitch yourself is frowned upon. Even with someone with your medical knowledge,” A voice said.
Martha turned around to see a familiar face. His hair was greyer than the last time they had met, but she recognized the smile and confidence of Al Pennyworth, her last light of yesteryear.
“Yeah, and a butler shouldn’t be wearing a teal shirt,” Martha responded.
“You’re my partner, not my boss, you made that very clear when you shuttered the manor,” Al explained as he looked over Martha’s body. The blood on her costume’s top indicated another rough night. “Take that off before you stitch your costume to your own skin.”
“That’s a bad thing?” Martha joked. “Would save me time having to duck out of meetings. And make me virtually bullet proof.”
“And have no life,” Al responded as Martha slid off the top of her suit, revealing a black sports bra and years of scars that never properly healed. Most people wondered why Martha Wayne had stopped going to most of the galas Wayne Medical had done to keep New Gotham going. But no make up could hide the cost of that peace on Martha’s body. “It wouldn’t kill you to find some help, or a partner.”
“It’s my burden Al,” Martha explained. “What kind of person would I be if I dragged someone else into this life. After Thomas…after Bruce, what kind of person would I be if I dragged someone into this life.”
“And I’m saying you’re getting too old for this Marty,” Al responded. “You’ve saved this city, what more could you possibly want?” He drew closer, peering through Martha’s brown eyes. Even now, after all these years they could pierce through Pennyworth’s soul.
“You know what I want,” Martha said as she looked away.
“I know,” Al said as he looked to the ground, he had hoped since he had been sent on this mission that Martha would have healed enough to call it off. But some wounds never truly heal. “And I came back to tell you I lost track of them in the sahara. After your confrontation with the Al Ghuls’ they’ve run to ground. And no one has heard a peep from Ra’s or his daughter.”
“Which on-” Martha began before the familiar blue light shone in the sky. The peace needed to be kept. “Al, I need to go. Do you mind providing intel from here?”
“Is the computer where it always is?” Al asked.
“It always is,” Martha said with a smile, knowing that even now, she still had something to fight for.
…
“I wanna make sure everyone clears the area,” Doctor Harleen Quinzel said as the NGCPD circled the graveyard. She was a profiler for the super criminals that had appeared since the Batwoman had put away that initial batch. It was a decent gig, one where Harleen could make sure she did a little good. But with Gordon still in the hospital, Harleen was tasked with handling the super crime of the city.
She looked at the scene wondering how New Gotham, a city of such promise, wonder, could still have people in the dirt, the falling rain couldn’t wash away what the profiler saw on such a daily basis.
“Doctor,” Batwoman said as she emerged from the shadows.
“You know ya losing your touch? I noticed you by that big angel. Why do people think ya needed a giant monument to honor them. It’s the memories that matter,” Harleen explained.
“What happened here?” Batwoman asked.
“Oh standard Gotham night,” Harleen began.
“Don’t you mean New Gotham?” Batwoman asked.
“The place never really changes, new or old, Gotham is always going to be Gotham. With weird shit like this always happening,” Harleen explained. “Poor kid got killed by ninjas. I don’t know whether to laugh or cry.”
“Ninjas?” Batwoman asked.
“Yeah, apparently the same kind that hunted you, what, two years ago? Their leader was Demon’s Head. You told Gordon you took care of him, didn’t ya.”
“I did,” Batwoman explained. Ra’s Al Ghul had came to Gotham to make Martha his bride, believing with her resources and sense of honor and justice. And while Martha was tempted, she had found new love, even if they didn’t want to admit it. In the fight over the Gotham Observatory, Ra’s had been killed, and his body placed in cold storage. It couldn’t have been him leading his armies anymore.
“Well ya didn’t, I got one dead kid and another’s missing body here. So tell me, what do you think?”
“Missing body?” Batwoman asked.
“Ya, those crazy jerks just dug up Bruce Wayne, can ya believe it? Kid did nothing wrong, and a bunch of losers in pajamas took his body. Ya think ol; Marty is going to take that well?”
Doctor Quinnzel turned around to see nobody behind her. Nothing but the grove of graves.
“Guess she still got it,” Quinnzel smiled as she went to coordinate the police, somewhere, justice would be found.
…
The ninjas made their way through the dessert, the sand whipping into their face as four of them carried a casket through the heat and slippery terrain. For many initiates crossing the harsh and bitter lands was a rite of passage, a way to prove to the Demon’s Head that they and they alone would protect their interests.
Hours passed, and as the dessert became cold, no man stopped. The Demon’s Head wanted this to be done quickly, so much time had passed since they had seen their beloved. When the heart is incomplete, nothing else matters. The acolytes who carried the body understood this. Their heart believed in the demon and they believed in them.
After a long time they arrived in a temple carved into the sand, the large sculptures of the demon were faded, the face cracked, and the colors long since drained of their vibrant hue when the Demon’s Head first arrived to make his oasis. As they entered, they could see their mistress.
“Were you successful?” A woman asked asked as they lowered the casket. One of the larger ninja’s bowed before the Demon’s Head. Her purple armor shined against the dull and drab sandstone.
“Yes mistress,” The ninja responded. “What will you do with the boy?”
“I will grant the detective her greatest wish,” Nysa Al Ghul. “And then take everything from her.”
NEXT: Time Out Continues As Martha Wayne Takes on Nysa Al Ghul! But Why Will This Crusade Send Ripples to the Real Timeline and Bruce Wayne?!

TRÅD UPPLAGD IGEN DÅ GAMLA TRÅDEN BUGGADE. SÅ FORT JAG VILLE UPPDATERA TEXTEN SÅ BLEV HELA INLÄGGET BLANKT OCH INGET KUNDE GÖRAS< Så följ och skriv gärna i denna tråd istället för den gamla Vinter 2024 tråden. Låter gamla Vinter 2024 tråden vara kvar ifall folk vill läsa kommentarer i den

Truppen 2024 (Uppdateras):
Målvakter: Nordfeldt, Janošević, Diawara
Defensiven: Milošević, Thychosen, Papagiannopoulos, Björnström, Modesto, Faqa, Sichenje, Tiedemann, Edh
Mittfältet: Salétros, Ali, Beširović, Dabo, Andersson, Ayari, Ellingsen, Celina, Coulibaly
Offensiven: Guidetti, Faraj, Pittas, Fesshaie, Ring, Gono, Stoch Rydell
Klara in: Kusi-Asare (S 2026), Tiedemann (2025), Diawara (2026), Ellingsen (2026), Celina (S 2026), Gono (2027), Edh (2027), Stoch Rydell (2027)
Ryktas förlänga:
Förlängt: Papagiannopoulos (2024+1)
Ryktas ut: Janošević (???), Modesto (Skottland/Nederländerna/HatayspoSalernitana), Ring (???), Dabo (???), Andersson (???), Fesshaie (???), Nordfeldt (Antalyaspor), Faraj (Debreceni VSC/Holland/Twente/Sparta Rotterdam), Pittas (AEK)
Ryktas in: Kahl (Århus), Näsberg (PAOK), Engvall (Värnamo), Wilson (Kariobangi Sharks), Mickelson (Odense BK), Andersson (Rosenborg), Mendes (Porto B)
Lånas ut: Elbouzedi (Swindon Town FC), Meja (AFC E), Bonde (Vasalund)
Lånas in: Coulibaly (Sheffield United)
Ryktas lånas in: Tzionis (Kansas City)
Ryktas lånas ut: Ring (???), Dabo (???), Andersson (???), Fesshaie (???), Collins (Sverige/Norge/Finland)
Lämnar bosman: Haliti (Jagiellonia), Brolin (Kalmar FF), J Durmaz (Gençlerbirliği), Keita (???), E Durmaz (Gençlerbirliği)
Lämnar via försäljning: Kabuye (Sandvikens IF), Kimpioka (St Johnstone), Otieno (Rakow), Kusi-Asare (Bayern München), Magashy (Kalmar FF), Aviander (GIF S)
HÄR UNDER UPPDATERAR JAG NÄR JAG FÅR NY INFORMATION:
Välkommen till vinterns tråd! Denna startar, precis som förra årets tråd, lite tidigare då lite information kommit ut och jag vill skriva ner allt.
18:e Oktober: Första dagen i tråden är som vanligt rörig då jag vill få in alla nyheter som kommit ut senaste veckorna: Papagiannopoulos sägs föra diskussioner om en förlängning men han jagas även utav utländska lag. Magashy har intresse på sig från bland annat Värnamo som sägs ha hört sig för om antingen lån eller köp. Daniel Kristoffersson skriver att Kimpioka och Elbouzedi förväntas lämna AIK i vinter. Han skriver även att Janošević och Keita kommer se över sin situation i klubben, båda har kontrakt till December 2024. Sägs att Haliti och Brolin inte kommer få förlängt så jag sätter båda på "Lämnar Bosman" för tillfället. Får även avvakta och se vad som sker med våra inlånade spelare Tiedemann och Celina, köpoption finns på båda.
20:e Oktober: Anel Avdic skriver i en låst artikel att AIK kan värva upp till sex spelare i vinter. Det verkar handla om en mittback, en mittfältare, en ytter eller anfallare och eventuellt en vänsterback om Otieno säljs med mera.
24:e Oktober: Papagiannopoulos jagas utav Grekiska OFI Crete, som även jagade honom i somras. Även en icke namngiven Grekisk klubb jagar Papagiannopoulos.
28:e Oktober: Fotbolldirekt skriver att klubbar i Skottland och Nederländerna jagar Rui Modesto. De sägs ha scouter på plats när AIK möter Halmstad BK. AIK:s prislapp sägs vara omkring 20 miljoner kronor. Enligt Fotbolldirekt så har Modesto inga problem med att stanna och förhandla om kontraktet då hans föredragna destination är England.
31:a Oktober: Anel Avdic skriver att AIK vill köpa loss Celina och Tiedemann.
3:e November: Anel Avdic och Daniel Kristoffersson skriver att AIK jagar Halmstad BK:s mittfältare Erik Ahlstrand. Även Hammarby, AGF Århus och NEC Nijmegen följer Ahlstrand.
7:e November: Mycket nyheter idag! Daniel Kristoffersson skriver i en låst artikel att Wisur Hansen var på plats och scoutade Sirius Wessam Abou Ali när Sirius spelade mot Brommapojkarna. Han skriver även att AIK har Brommapojkarnas Zeidane Inoussa på radarn samt att man vill ersätta Otieno med Eric Kahl. Vi ska också vara överens med både Tiedemann och Celina om en fortsättning.
8:e November: Haliti som har utgående har fått ett erbjudande från Polska Jagiellonia och lämnar troligtvis som bosman i December.
10:e November: Kusi-Asare har skrivit på ett A-lagskontrakt till September 2026.
13:e November: Anel Avdic skriver att Wisur Hansen befinner sig i Gambia och Sierra Leone. Han skriver att man vill plocka in minst 2 spelare på provspel. Berntsen bekräftar även dom uppgifterna. Anel Avdic skriver senare på kvällen i en låst AIK 2024 artikel att AIK förhandlar med Papagiannopoulos om en förlängning samt att, precis som Daniel Kristoffersson för drygt 3 veckor sedan skrev, att man vill göra sig av med Kimpioka, Magashy, Elbouzedi och Janošević.
15:e November: Haliti bekräftar för Fotbollskanalen att han lämnar AIK när hans kontrakt går ut i December för utlandet.
20:e November: Daniel Kristoffersson skriver i en låst artikel att upp emot 12 spelare kan lämna AIK i vinter. Det handlar, som tidigare nämnt, om Kimpioka, Magashy, Elbouzedi och Janošević men även Ring, Dabo, Andersson och Fesshaie kan säljas eller lånas ut medans Elias Durmaz kan lånas ut. Han skriver även att Jimmy Durmaz eventuellt kan lämna beroende på om han orkar nöta bänk eller inte. Senare på kvällen skriver Anel Avdic att AIK erbjudit Ramon Pascal Lundqvist ett kontrakt. Han skriver även att Samuel Brolin som blir bosman i slutet utav året jagas utav Kalmar FF.
21:a November: Fotbolldirekt skriver att Nordfeldts gamla klubb Gençlerbirliği SK sägs vara intresserade att plocka tillbaka Nordfeldt. De skriver att Nordfeldt även han är intresserad utav en sista sväng utomlands. Samtidigt så skriver en Turkisk journalist att det inte finns någon sanning i detta ryktet.
22:a November: Fotbolldirekt påstår att Samuel Brolin och BK Häcken ska träffas under veckan. Vet inte hur trovärdigt det ryktet är. Även Kalmar FF är fortsatt intresserade. Det betyder troligtvis att han lämnar som bosman och att vi plockar in en ny målvakt. Det har dock gått lite snack om att Brolin kan förlänga men det återstår att se.
24:e November: Norska Fredrikstad har hört sig för kring Magashy. Otieno jagas utav Franska och Spanska klubbar skriver Anel Avdic.
27:e November: Fotbolldirekt påstår att Brolin snart är överens om en bosmanövergång till Kalmar FF. Det verkar alltså inte bli någon förlängning i vinter. Kenyanska konton på X påstår att AIK kommer plocka in mittfältstalangen Stanley Wilson på provträning i Januari.
30:e November: GIF Sundsvalls sportchef säger i en intervju med Fotbollsmorgon att man öppnar för att ta tillbaks Elias Durmaz. Vet inte om han menar lån eller permanent. Fotbolldirekt skriver att Pascal Lindqvist nobbat AIK då han vill fortsätta utomlands.
4:e December: Berntsen säger i AIK Play att man inom kort kommer ha ett möte med Celina angående en gemensam framtid samt att man för diskussioner med Tiedemann Hansen och att Papagiannopoulos med högst sannolikhet stannar. Han säger även att Otieno kommer lämna. Han blev i princip lovad utav Berntsen i somras att han skulle få lämna nu i vinter och där ska också en ersättare plockas in.
6:e December Calvin Kabuye lämnar AIK permanent för Sandvikens IF.
7:e December: Sportbladet säger i 60 minuter om AIK att Berntsen försöker låna in mittfältaren Ismaila Coulibaly från Sheffield United. Berntsen var med och sålde Coulibaly från Sarpsborg till Sheffield United för ett par år sedan.
8:e December: Sportbladet påstår att Samuel Brolin är klar för en bosmanövergång till Kalmar FF. En stund senare skriver Sportexpressen samma sak och att det blir officiellt nästa vecka. Norske journalisten Stian André de Wahl säger i Tuttosvenskan att AIK är intresserade utav PAOKs mittback Ivan Näsberg som har kontrakt till sommaren 2025 och Molde FK:s defensiva mittfältare Martin Ellingsen som har utgående kontrakt.
11:e December: Anel Avdic skriver att AIK vill värva Martin Ellingsen som Stian André de Wahl nämnde för Tuttosvenskan för ett par dagar sedan.
12:e December: Daniel Kristoffersson skriver att 18 årige Emmanuel Gono som spelar i FC Kallon är nära AIK. Nu står det även klart att Brolin lämnar AIK för Kalmar FF som bosman.
13:e December: PSV och Club Brugge jagar Jonah Kusi-Asare. Kontakt har tagits och prislappen sägs vara kring 60 miljoner kronor skriver Daniel Kristoffersson.
14:e December: Ismaila Coulibaly följer AIK på sociala medier så ett lån alternativt en affär kan vara nära eller till och med klar.
18:e December: Daniel Kristoffersson skriver att AIK vill göra klart med Coulibaly innan nyår. Fortfarande oklart om det blir lån eller en övergång direkt. Senare på eftermiddagen skriver Anel Avdic att det står klart att AIK kommer ta in Stanley Wilson på provspel från Kariobangi Sharks innan man gör en permanent affär.
24:e December: Anel Avdic skriver att AIK och Papagiannopoulos är överens om en förlängning och det väntas bli officiellt inom kort. Okänt hur många år.
26:e December: Och där är det klart. Papagiannopoulos har förlängt till December 2024 med en option för ytterligare 1 säsong.
27:e December: Ismael Diawara sägs vara nära AIK på en permanent affär från Malmö skriver Anel Avdic. Samtidigt så ger Josip Ladan hintar om att affären redan är klar. Daniel Kristoffersson skriver en kort stund senare att Nordfeldt är nära Antalyaspor i Turkiet samt att Diawaras läkarundersökning och kontraktsskrivning sker imorgon. Tiedemann Hansen köps också loss från Molde FK skriver Anel Avdic. Tiedemann är nu klar för AIK på ett kontrakt till December 2025.
28:e December: Diawara är nu klar på ett kontrakt till December 2026. Värt att notera är att Berntsen även säger i AIK+ att Diawara och Nordfeldt kommer vara duon som ska slåss om platsen i målet. Så Nordfeldt stannar alltså eventuellt kvar i AIK.
29:e December: Daniel Kristoffersson släpper tidigt på morgonen en artikel där han påstår att AIK och Kimpioka är nära att bryta kontraktet i förtid och att Kimpioka har intresse på sig från Skottland bland annat.
31:a December: Martin Ellingsen är nu klar på ett kontrakt till December 2026. Anel Avdic skriver att Rui Modesto har intresse på sig från Hatayspor som även lagt ett bud som AIK nekat.
1:a Januari: Kimpioka sägs vara nära St Johnstone skriver Daniel Kristoffersson. Anel Avdic skriver att AIK värvar Celina permanent.
2:a Januari: Kimpioka är nu klar för St Johnstone. Han släpps i princip gratis fast med en vidareförsäljningsklausul. Celina är nu klar på ett 2,5 års kontrakt.
4:e Januari: Tysk media rapporterar att Bayern Munchen är intresserade utav Kusi-Asare. Dom sägs vilja erbjuda runt 5 miljoner euro medans PSV sägs vilja lägga ett bud kring 7-8 miljoner euro.
5:e Januari: Daniel Kristoffersson skriver att Keita jagas utav en Fransk klubb, okänt vilken klubb det handlar om samt vilken liga. Jimmy Durmaz har intresse på sig från Turkiet och AIK kan tänka sig att släppa honom i princip gratis ifall en klubb hittas. Han skriver också att Espanyol fortfarande är intresserade utav Otieno och AIK vill sälja. Janošević kommer att lämna AIK men får vara kvar under träningslägret då Diawara kommer spela Afrikanska mästerskapet. Anel Avdic skriver att Ismaila Coulibaly fortfarande är högaktuell för AIK och att, som Disco skrev, Keita är aktuell för en Fransk klubb, men enligt Anel så är det en Ligue 2 klubb.
7:e Januari: Cypriotisk media skriver att Henning Berg vill få in Cypriotiske mittfältaren och yttern Marinos Tzionis som spelar i Kansas City. Sägs att man i så fall plockar in honom på lån med en köpoption.
9:e Januari: Gono har nu anslutit på provspel. Polska mästarna Rakow Czestochowa sägs vara nära att köpa loss Otieno. Om allt går i lås så är han såld inom ett par veckor. Berntsen säger också i en intervju med Sportbladet att han aldrig hört talas om namnet Marinos Tzionis och att han inte är nära eller att man pratar med honom. Anel Avdic skriver att Bayern Munchen lagt ett första bud på Kusi-Asare. Det sägs ligga på mellan 40-50 miljoner kronor.
10:e Januari: Fabrizio Romano skriver att AIK vill ha runt 6 miljoner euro för Kusi-Asare. Enligt Anel Avdic så innehöll första budet en hel del bonusar men AIK vill ha en större klumpsumma istället.
11:e Januari: Otieno är nu klar för Rakow Czestochowa.
13:e Januari: Engelska HITC skriver att klubbar som Chelsea, Manchester United, Borussia Dortmund, Atlético Madrid och Ajax visar intresse för Kusi-Asare. Turkiske journalisten Ekrem Konur påstår även att Arsenal och Milan visar intresse.
15:e Januari: Sakrayaspor och Sanliurfaspor visar intresse för Jimmy Durmaz och han sägs lämna inom kort. AIK har kontaktat Oliver Zandén för att ersätta Otieno som lämnade förra veckan. Det ska dock finnas mer alternativ än Zandén skriver Anel Avdic.
17:e Januari: Franska La Dépêche du Midi skriver att Toulouse kan släppa Zandén gratis utan någon övergångssumma. De skriver också, precis som Anel Avdic skrev för några dagar sedan, att AIK är intresserade. Anel Avdic skriver senare på kvällen att Ungerska klubben Debreceni VSC lagt ett bud på Omar Faraj. Okänt hur stort budet är.
19:e Januari: Italienske journalisten Gianluca Di Marzio skriver att US Salernitana 1919 förhandlar med AIK om Rui Modesto. Josip Ladan säger i Tuttosvenskan att Bayern Munchen i princip gjort klart med Kusi-Asare och att det är en fråga om tid tills allting är klart. Återstår att se ifall detta stämmer eller inte.
22:a Januari: Anel Avdic skriver att AIK vill köpa loss Gono från FC Kallon. AIK och Jimmy Durmaz har kommit överens om att bryta kontraktet och han lämnar AIK skriver Anel Avdic. Bör bli officiellt inom kort.
23:e Januari: Och där är det klart. AIK och Jimmy Durmaz bryter kontraktet. Josip Ladan säger i Tuttosvenskans SillySvenskan program att det finns två bud på Faraj. Ett från Holland och ett från Ungern. Daniel Kristoffersson skriver att AIK och Keita kommer gå skilda vägar inom kort.
24:e Januari: Blir ingen Oliver Zandén. Han är klar för Randers i Danmark på ett lån.
26:e Januari: Verkar inte bli någon Ahlstrand till AIK. Han sägs enligt TuttoSvenskan vara klar för en övergång till St Pauli som är serieledare i 2.Bundesliga. Även Anel Avdic skriver att en övergång är klar för Ahlstrand. Tar bort honom från ryktas in. AIK och Keita har nu kommit överens om att bryta kontraktet och han lämnar AIK.
27:e Januari: Anel Avdic skriver att PSV Eindhovens chefsscout Denny Spronck var på plats idag och scoutade Kusi-Asare i träningsmatchen mot Brommapojkarna där Kusi-Asare gjorde 2 mål. Han skriver att både PSV och Bayern Munchen kommer lägga nya bud inom kort då deras fönster stänger inom ett par dagar.
28:e Januari: Elbouzedi är nära att lånas ut. En klubb i Engelska fjärdedivisionen visar intresse, men även andra klubbar ska vara intresserade skriver Daniel Kristoffersson. Provspelaren Stanley Wilson är nu på plats i Sverige.
29:e Januari: Fabrizio Romano skriver att AIK och Bayern Munchen är överens om en övergång. Kusi-Asare reser inom kort till Tyskland där han ska genomgå läkarundersökning och skriva på kontraktet. AIK får 6.5 miljoner euro. Anel Avdic skriver att AIK får 60 miljoner kronor samt att man kan få ytterligare 20-25 miljoner kronor via bonusar. Han skriver även att Elias Durmaz är på väg till Turkiet där det ska finnas några klubbar som är intresserade.
30:e Januari: Daniel Kristoffersson skriver att AIK lånar ut Henry Meja till AFC Eskilstuna över hela 2024. Elbouzedi lånas ut till Swindon Town FC fram till Juni 2024.
1:a Februari: Kusi-Asare är nu såld till Bayern München. Skrivs också i diverse medier att AIK avvaktar med Coulibaly tills efter majoriteten av fönster stänger vid natten mellan första och andra Februari. Flera Sheffield konton skriver att Coulibaly högst troligt hamnar i Sverige och att det troligtvis blir AIK. Anel Avdic skriver att Elias Durmaz kan hamna i samma klubb som sin storebror. Även andra Turkiska klubbar ska vara intresserade. Berntsen säger till Fotbollskanalen att man hört sig för med Gustav Engvall i Värnamo men att man just nu inte har ekonomin för det. Han säger också att Rui Modesto stannar åtminstone till sommaren. I en sändning med Daniel Kristoffersson så säger Berntsen att det är smådetaljer kvar att lösa och man hoppas att man kan flyga ner Coulibaly till lägret inom kort.
2:a Februari: Coulibaly är nu klar för AIK på ett lån till sommaren.
3:e Februari: Daniel Kristoffersson skriver att AIK gjort klart med Emmanuel Gono på en permanent övergång och att det presenteras inom kort. AIK ska också vara överens med Stanley Wilson och Kariobangi Sharks om en permanent övergång.
5:e Februari: Anel Avdic skriver att Elias Durmaz och Gençlerbirliği är överens och han lämnar AIK och blir presenterad inom kort.
6:e Februari: AIK går ut med att man brutit avtalet med Elias Durmaz och han lämnar AIK.
13:e Februari: TuttoSvenskan skriver att Kalmar FF är intresserade utav Magashy. Osäkert om det är ett lån eller i en permanent affär.
15:e Februari: Fotbolldirekt skriver att AIK och Djurgården är intresserade utav Thai-Norske ytterbacken Nicholas Mickelson som spelar i Odense BK.
17:e Februari: Daniel Kristoffersson skriver att Magashy är klar för Kalmar FF och presenteras inom kort.
18:e Februari: Anel Avdic skriver att AIK jobbar på att värva in Adam Andersson från Rosenborgs BK. Skulle en värvning inte gå igenom så finns det andra alternativ.
19:e Februari: Inoussa som vi visade intresse för i vintras sägs vara klar för Häcken i en rekordaffär på omkring 15 miljoner kronor. Tar bort honom från ryktas in. I 60 minuter om AIK på Sportbladet så säger Daniel Kristoffersson att AIK eventuellt väntar in Kusi-Asare pengarna innan man presenterar Wilson och Gono. Båda kommer vara i AIK i ett par månader till så det är inte bråttom. Wilson skriver troligtvis kontrakt i sommar. AIK har även scoutat vänsterbackar i Portugal och man har fortsatt Adam Andersson som alternativ men enligt Daniel Kristoffersson så är utländska spåret ett hetare alternativ. Sichenje verkar också lämna inom kort då han inte verkar få vara med i 11 mot 11 spel på träningar samt att han fortsatt har en skada och verkar själv vilja lämna. Verkar i så fall handla om ett lån.
20:e Februari: Anel Avdic skriver att Mjällby AIF vill låna Collins Sichenje. Daniel Kristoffersson skriver att AIK får mellan 500 - 750 000 kronor för Magashy samt att en vidareförsäljningsklausul är inskriven. Affären bör bli klar inom kort. Magashy är nu klar för Kalmar FF.
21:a Februari: Collins Sichenje kommer inte säljas till Mjällby AIF säger Berntsen till FotbollSthlm. Han säger att han inte hört något från Mjällby eller om en eventuell försäljning. Dock så kan ett eventuellt lån fortsatt vara aktuellt eftersom det var det Anel Avdic skrev den 20:e Februari.
24:e Februari: Daniel Kristoffersson skriver att AIK kollat upp möjligheten över att värva Mohanad Jeahze från DC United.
25:e Februari: Fotbolldirekt skriver att Gono kommer presenteras idag eller imorgon och att han skrivit under ett långtidskontrakt.
26:e Februari: Gono är nu klar på ett kontrakt till December 2027.
28:e Februari: Daniel Kristoffersson skriver att AIK inte kommer värva Jeahze och att man tittar på andra alternativ. Tar bort honom från ryktas in.
8:e Mars: Fotbolldirekt skriver att AIK visar intresse för HTFF:s högerback Hampus Skoglund. Berntsen ska redan ha lagt ett bud.
9:e Mars: Fotbolldirekt skriver att AIK drar sig ur jakten på Odense BKs ytterback Nicholas Mickelson. Dom skriver att det är på grund utav prislappen.
11:e Mars: AIK påstås vara nära att värva yttern Stoch Rydell från Nordsjällands U19 lag. Skriver in honom här tills jag får mer information om det handlar om U eller A-laget. Vad jag förstår det som så är det A-laget.
12:e Mars: Den Portugisiska vänsterbacken AIK scoutat i Portugal är 23 årige João Mendes som spelar i Porto B. Osäker om en värvning kommer ske eller inte men han blir bosman i sommar säger Daniel Kristoffersson i senaste podd avsnittet.
13:e Mars: AIK och Lilleström SK förhandlar om 21 årige Norske ytterback/yttermittfältaren Eskil Edh. Om förhandlingarna går bra så kan han landa i Stockholm redan till helgen och skriva på skriver Anel Avdic. Berntsen säger i en intervju med Fotbollskanalen att Meja högst troligt är klar för en klubb inom kort. Han säger även att det är Norska, Svenska och Finska klubbar som är intresserade utav Collins, framförallt på lån. Berntsen säger dock att det inte är sannolikt att han hamnar i en Svensk klubb utan går i så fall till en annan liga i Skandinavien eller Norden. Morten Svesengen som är reporter på Romerikes Blad i Lilleström skriver att Edh reser till Sverige imorgon för läkarundersökning.
15:e Mars: Eskil Edh är nu klar på ett kontrakt till December 2027. Blir ingen Skoglund då han valt att förlänga sitt kontrakt med Hammarby.
18:e Mars: Meja är nu presenterad av AFC Eskilstuna på ett lån året ut.
19:e Mars: Fotbolldirekt skriver att Twente FC och Sparta Rotterdam är intresserade utav Faraj. Dom påstår att prislappen ligger på 2,2 - 2,5 miljoner euro.
22:a Mars: AEK sägs visa intresse för Pittas skriver tidningen SDNA som sägs ha hög trovärdighet.
24:e Mars: Fotbolldirekt skriver att GIF Sundsvall vill köpa loss eller låna Aviander.
26:e Mars: Daniel Kristoffersson skriver att AIK är nära att värva Stoch Rydell från Nordsjällands U19 lag. Om allt går igenom så presenteras han imorgon. Anel Avdic skriver någon timme senare att AIK vill betala 1 miljon kronor medans Nordsjälland vill ha upp mot 1,6 miljoner men att båda parterna jobbar på en lösning. Fotbolldirekt skriver att Aviander köps loss från AIK av GIF Sundsvall och att det blir klart inom kort.
27:e Mars: Enligt Sportexpressen så lånas Bonde ut till Vasalund under hela 2024. Bör bli klart ikväll eller imorgon. Aviander är nu klar för GIF Sundsvall. Stoch Rydell är nu klar för AIK på ett kontrakt till December 2026.
28:e Mars: Bonde lånas ut hela 2024 till Vasalund.
Fönstret är nu stängt. Och med det sagt så tackar jag för att ni följt tråden denna vinter. Följ gärna nya Hockeysillyn. En ny silly om sommarens fönster kommer upp inom ett par månader.

Air Sharky Mag

Boys: Brick, Damien, Geoff, Rodney, Scott, Trent
Girls: Eva, Izzy, Millie, Priya, Sky
Episode 16: Search and Do Not Destroy
"Last time, on Total Drama Island! The teams were dissolved, leaving each and every camper to look out for #1, and just to add a little more drama to the mix, Izzy and Rodney returned for more fun!"
"The campers were made to suffer all manner of abuse in the 'No Pain, No Game' challenge. In an act of chivalry, Piya stepped up to save Damien from the perils of the leech barrel. And after Eva won invincibility thanks to Gwen's log rolling failure, she and Scott managed to get the majority votes in order to boot out Gwen.”
"Now that the campers are forced to fend for themselves, who will be selfless? Who will be selfish? And who will eat shellfish? Stay tuned for the most thrilling episode yet, on Total! Drama! Island!"
(Theme Song)
A distance shot of the camp set to a soft tune began the episode. A flock of geese flew across the sky, and as the music played, the scene switched over to a hollow in a tree as a squirrel climbed out onto a branch and rubbed the sleep from its eyes. A bird passed over it and made a beeline to the trailer that had been won in the previous episode. It came to a brief landing on top before the door slammed open and Eva emerged, stretching her arms and already dressed.
The scene cut to the exterior of the girls’ cabin before zooming in to Millie, Sky, and Priya having a conversation with each other.
“I know Eva told us and Gwen to vote out Scott, yet somehow Gwen got the boot,” Sky said.
“I know there are more boys than us girls now, but maybe one of us switched their vote to someone else,” Millie guessed.
“Something's not adding up here,” Priya frowned deeply. “Let's discuss this more when Eva's around.”
The three girls left their cabin, and as soon as they did, the camera zoomed in closer on Millie's pillow, which was then promptly lifted up by a pale hand, exposing the author's notebook for a brief moment before it got swiped.
The hand that took the book was revealed to be Scott's. The dirt boy flipped over a few pages in order to read what was inside, and when he was done, he ripped off a few empty pages and stuffed both the book and the pages into both of his pockets before running away.
The shot lingered on where Scott was standing before moving over to the bottom right in order to show that Izzy, who was laying underneath her bunk, had watched what just happened with a curious look.
Confessional: Izzy
“Why did Scott take pages off of Millie's journal if he doesn't like reading?” Izzy questioned the viewers. “I'll have to figure that out soon.”
Confessional: Scott
“This is why I needed Gwen eliminated in the last episode,” Scott explained. “With her gone, it'll make sure that my next plan won't make anyone the slightest bit suspicious.”
Confessionals End
A cannon was heard being shot, the fuse lit by Chris who had taken to wearing a pirate captain costume. The cannonball howled over where Eva was relaxing in a chair, the young woman startled out of her state of relaxation as the cannonball landed behind her trailer, though thankfully it didn't explode.
"Arrrr, maties!" Chris said into his megaphone with a pirate's accent. "Meet me at the amphitheater in five minutes, and I'll tell you about today's challenge!"
A shot of the stage showed both Chef and Chris standing on it with a sheet-covered lump between them. Chef, like Chris, wore a pirate hat. In the foreground, the campers had taken their seats, dividing themselves according to their original teams. Eva was the last to arrive, carrying a plate of steak from her trailer and eating from it, prompting Geoff and Priya to share a glance.
"Well, my little scallywags," Chris began, "have we got an adventure in store for ye!" The fake macaw on his shoulder tilted forward with a squeak, but the host quickly pushed it back into place.
"What's under the sheet?" Geoff asked jovially.
"All in good time, laddie!" Chris answered. "Who here has a hankerin' for a good old-fashioned treasure hunt?" Sky sighed and rolled her eyes. "Now, this treasure hunt's got a twist, mateys!" Chris explained. "What you're lookin' for isn't hidden! And, it isn't treasure!"
"If there's no treasure," Rodney asked, "then why do you have an eyepatch and a parrot?"
"Arr, shiver me timbers!" Chris threw the fake parrot off his shoulder. "Good question, me boy! You're lookin' for keys," he held up an example, "to a treasure chest!" On cue, Chef pulled back the sheet to reveal a stack of three gleaming chests.
"Inside each of these chests," Chris continued as the camera zoomed in on the potential prize boxes, "is a treasure that will pamper you land-lubbers! And one of these chests will even give you invincibility!" He laughed as Chef walked into view with a metal bucket holding several of what looked to be short wooden boards. "Now come 'round, and pull a clue out of this bucket! Or you'll have to walk the plank!"
Millie and Brick shared an anxious look before the footage flashed forward.
Twelve hands grabbed all at once, emptying the bucket. "These clues will tell ye where your key be stowed!" Chris told them, the camera showing both the teens examining what they'd picked.
Millie's was focused on first, showing a solid black image of a bear and key against the white papered glued to the piece of wood. "A bear?" she said in disbelief.
"I was hoping you'd get that one, bra," Chris told her, dropping the accent. "Chef's fridge!" he told Scott. "Nice! I hear he brushes it daily for fingerprints." The boy began to worry.
"That there is the septic tank for the washrooms!" Chris stood next to Geoff, who's image on his clue showed a tank of water with a key inside.
"All you scallywags," Chris announced in his pirate accent, once more in the center of the stage, "go find your keys, and bring them back by 6:00 pm, Eastern Standard Time," he showed the gold watch on his wrist, "to open up the chest, and get your loot!" A short clip was shown of his hand inserting a key into one of the chests and it opening, a golden glow hiding the contents.
"Fare thee well, young scallywags!" he told them. "Now get to it!"
Confessional: Priya
"I don't know who comes up with these challenges," Priya griped in the outhouse. "At the very least, my key isn't in the septic tank, and it's super disgusting." She gave off a disgusted shiver.
Confessional: Millie
"This may surprise you, but I really love treasure hunts," Millie said enthusiastically. "Ever since I was young, I've always been into searching for clues," she said before frowning, "but why does my key have to be with a bear?"
Confessionals End
The footage cut back to a shot of a key hanging on a wooden pole in the lake, the shot expanding to reveal a trio of shark fins circling it and Trent standing on the dock.
"Trent's first challenge," Chris narrated, "to grab his key from the man-eating shark infested lake!" Trent formed a plan in his head then walked away. A flash transitioned to him now wearing his swim trunks and holding a pair of fish. He threw the fish entirely off-screen, causing the three sharks to immediately give chase and disappear. Trent then dove into the water while Sky came over to watch, and returned moments later to the edge of the dock with the key in his hand.
"That was way too easy," Trent said confidently.
"Scott must retrieve his key from inside Chef's bank vault of a fridge without getting caught," Chris said as the farmer looked from his clue to the kitchen. He entered cautiously, and when he opened the fridge, he was met with Chef crammed inside while holding a hatchet knife, and Scott closed the fridge with a frightened look.
The camera flashed to Sky walking through the woods. In the foreground, a skunk poked itself out a hole in the ground, causing the athlete to cover her nose due to the animal's stench.
“Are you okay?” Trent entered the scene.
“No. My key is in that skunk hole,” Sky griped.
Trent whipped out his key. “Listen, I've already got my key. Let me help you out.”
“I know what to do for this,” Sky said. “Pour water down the hole and it'll flush the skunks out.”
“That's what I was going to say,” Trent complimented his crush. “Smart thinking.”
Sky felt flattered by his words before covering her nose. “We better do this fast.”
The mess hall exterior was shown again before the shot cut to the roof. Scott tied a piece of rope to a nearby pipe and pushed the rest down the hole. He then slid down the rope and saw Chef sleeping, various knives and a chainsaw spread out on the table in front of him.
Scott then let go of the rope and tiptoed past the snoring cook in order to open the fridge. He grabbed his key, closed the fridge, and started climbing back up to the roof.
Chef then ceased his snoring and woke up. “How come all the other kids get ponies!?” he said as he slammed his hatchet on the table. Scott froze for a bit, but after seeing Chef fall back asleep, he continued his climb, and when he got to the roof, he pulled the rope back up, took the tied piece out of the pipe, and got off the roof.
Back in the woods, Trent and Sky walked over to the skunk hole and dumped a bucket of water through it before quickly moving away. A skunk came out of there seconds later, and the duo returned in order for Sky to grab her key.
Confessional: Trent
"The fact that Sky is so independent, coupled with the fact that she's incredible to look at, is just making me nuts,” Trent admitted. “She rocks my world. So yeah, I'll take a skunk shot for her any day."
Confessional: Sky
"I didn’t ask for Trent to help me, but he still did it anyway," Sky said while lying down on the seat. "He's really sweet, and while I don’t want a relationship now, I won’t mind paying him back later down the line."
Confessionals End
Sky ran up to Trent and hugged him in gratitude. Trent was taken back at first, but returned the hug as well. The footage paused and Chris talked over it. "Aww. What a trust-building, heart-warming moment. I would’ve given more points if I saw tongue."
The footage resumed and shifted to a nearby bush, where Scott had watched the entire exchange with an intrigued look.
Confessional: Scott
“Trent and Sky?” Scott mused to himself. “On normal circumstances, I’d drive a wedge between them, but I have more important things to do than getting in between a relationship.”
Confessional Ends
A close-up of a clue was shown, the image portraying a key over a fire. The brown-skinned hand lowered it, revealing a raised ring of fire with the key dangling in the center. Priya grinned, and easily jumped through the hoop. "Priya's athleticism seems to be helping her with her challenge," Chris narrated as the reality fan landed on both feet, and raised her key to the camera.
"But good ol' Brick seems a little out of his league," the host continued as the scene changed to Brick. He was shown climbing a tree, the key hanging on a large branch. He tried to grab the key, but a woodpecker landed nearby and began pecking away at the wood, forcing the boy to withdraw his hand.
Geoff's clue was shown closely as he stood near one of the putrid toilets wearing goggles. He lowered it and looked around the stall at the pieces of unused toilet paper and assorted flies, and teared up. "Meanwhile, back in the communal washrooms," Chris snickered, "things are starting to pile up!" The party guy put on a snorkeling mouthpiece and got into the toilet.
The next clue shown depicted a beehive, the camera moving back to reveal Rodney looking at the location from a good distance. Izzy was then shown walking up to Rodney, and after she read his clue, she made her way to the beehive. Moments later, she was back with Rodney’s key, although she was covered with the bees from head to toe.
“How are you okay with this?” Rodney asked in bewilderment as he took his key, but it quickly turned into fear as the bees got off of Izzy and started chasing him around. He dashed to the docks and jumped into the water in an attempt to ward off the bees.
Izzy had watched what was happening with an oblivious smile. "Good luck, Rodney!"
A key glistened around a bear's neck as it padded around sleepily. As it yawned and laid down to sleep, the camera panned over to the cave entrance, where Millie, after taking a look at the bear, tiptoed towards her target. "Okay," she whispered as she made her way forward. "Just grab the key and run."
She reached down to grab her key, but the bear shifted in its sleep and covered the key with a paw. Millie then tried to get her key by tucking her arm through the bear, but the bear, thinking that the girl was a pillow, grabbed her tight, much to her discomfort as she held her key.
Another clue showed a snake, and as with the others it was lowered to show the animal in question – a rattlesnake – coiled around the key. Izzy watched it from a distance, then proceeded to make her move.
“Hey, little fella. How you doing?” Izzy admired the snake. “Aw boy, you sure are cute.” The snake bit into the crazy girl’s forehead, but she didn’t seem to mind. “And feisty too!” She then felt disoriented from the bite and eventually collapsed.
The shot zoomed out as Rodney, who was now covered in bee stings, walked over and saw Izzy and the snake stuck to each other. “Are you going to be fine, Izzy?” he asked with concern.
Izzy got to her feet, but the snake wrapped itself all around her. “Cool. I have an animal buddy with me!” she gleefully noticed. “See ya.”
Rodney looked at Izzy strutting away thanks to her condition, and while he was weirded out by it, he shook his head and walked off.
The next key was shown inside a wine glass on top of a rock surrounded by water. The camera quickly zoomed out to show that a ladder had been set up on either side of the small pool, and a dilapidated plank bridge hung across them. Eva was on the bridge, balancing in the gap over her target where two of the steps had been broken. Down below, a pair of alligators snapped at her.
The scene cut to Sky entering her cabin. She saw an envelope on top of her bed, causing her to pick it up. The gymnast opened the envelope and pulled out a note. "Meet by the Dock of Shame at five," she read. "Hmm. I wonder what for."
(Commercial Break)
The episode reopened with a shot of a seagull floating in the ocean with the island in the background. Suddenly, a crocodile from underneath swallowed the seagull whole.
The toilet Geoff got into was shown. “Oh, for the love of all that's good, someone tell me where this key is!” Geoff's voice cried out.
The footage panned left to show Scott listening to the party boy's suffering and laughing to himself as he wrote on one of the pages he stole from Millie.
“Scott is a gross rat who likes to think he's better than he actually is,” Scott wrote down. “That is so hurtful… to me at least, but I'll touch up on that later on.” The devious boy moved on to the next page. “Now for the other contestants, and I have a LOT to insult them for!”
The shot changed to Trent sitting on the docks and playing an upbeat tune on his guitar. His music managed to attract the crocodile from earlier, and while he was surprised to see the crocodile enjoying his guitar playing, he quickly accepted it and kept on playing.
The scene flashed to the right to show Sky making her way to the docks and carrying along the envelope. She saw Trent playing his guitar, and wanting to get his attention, she picked up a pebble rock and threw it at his neck.
Trent felt the rock and paused what he was doing in order to look behind and see Sky. “Sky, you made it,” he said with a smile.
“Of course I did,” Sky told him. “You gave me the envelope, and I don't have anything better to do.”
They both saw the crocodile groan and swim away from them, annoyed that the song he was listening to ended.
“What was that crocodile even doing here?” Sky asked.
“It got attached to my song, and I knew if I told them to go away, I'd be eaten alive,” Trent said.
“A musician with a brain,” Sky smirked and sat next to Trent. “Never thought I'd meet one in my life.”
Trent laughed at her joke. “Harsh.”
“But anyway, I'm glad we get to talk to each other now that the merge hit,” Sky told the musician.
“Me too,” Trent nodded. “How have things been going with you and the girls?”
“Everyone’s still trying to figure out how Gwen got booted,” Sky shrugged.
"Same with me and the guys," Trent said. "Scott told me, Rodney, and Brick to vote Izzy off."
“Hold up,” Sky said with a look of surprise. “Eva told me, Gwen, Millie, and Priya to help her boot out Scott.”
“Damien, Geoff, and Izzy were the only ones that weren't talked to, meaning that they likely voted for Gwen,” Trent pointed out.
“And given what we know, Scott should've been the one going home instead,” Sky realized. “If five votes were enough to send Gwen packing, that means two of us switched their vote to her, and I think I know which ones,” she said suspiciously.
“So Eva or Scott must have lied then,” Trent said with the same realization.
"Must be," Sky sighed. "After all, they were the ones who brought up who should get kicked off."
“We don't know if it's for certain, and we can't directly confront them otherwise we could get targeted,” Trent said.
“I guess you're right,” Sky agreed.
“Moving on, remember the song I was meant to play at the talent show until my guitar got ruined?” Trent asked, and the athletic girl nodded. “Well, I want to play it and see how pleasing it sounds.”
“Who's here to judge you but me?” Sky asked. “Just let me hear it.”
On her advice, Trent started strumming the strings of his guitar and played his song.
“They say that we've only got summer,
And I say that's really a bummer.
But we'll swim in the sun and have lots of fun…
It'll just be the two of us…
Nothing to do... just hang…
So let me say only this…
Stick around... for just one kiss…”
After Trent was finished, he turned to face an enamored Sky. “Sooo… anything you want to say about it?”
Sky quickly returned to being professional. “That was really sweet, and if it was for the talent show, then that means the song was meant to be about us.”
“Admittedly, it was, but I don't want to just jump into a relationship,” Trent informed. “We've only spent a couple of weeks together.”
“That's exactly how I feel about us. I used to date this guy named Keith, but we broke up before I came here,” Sky told him. “I'm going to take a walk in the woods for a bit. Thanks for the song, but make sure your next ones have the lyrics evenly balanced.”
Trent watched her go, and a touched smile formed on his face.
Confessional: Sky
“I know I'm not like an average boy obsessed teenage girl, but I can't help it!” Sky squealed romantically. “Trent is super cute!”
Confessional: Trent
“Sky is a big sweetheart,” Trent grinned. “We have different interests, but our dynamic works.”
Confessionals End
The scene changed back to a cave, focusing on a close-up of the sleeping bear. Millie, who was still in an arm lock, waved her key in front of the bear's nose. The bear felt it and removed his arm, giving the girl a moment of relief before she felt her head get shoved into the bear's mouth.
“What the heck?!” the author hissed silently to herself until the bear fully woke up, and when it did, their brow lowered once they saw who they were cuddling with and they growled. “I hope my head is chewy for you,” Millie said snarkily.
Meanwhile, Rodney was seen walking out of the washrooms, the bee stings from earlier being gone. “That was a nice shower. Totally got rid of the bee stings,” he said gratefully.
The country boy walked past a bush… only to take a few steps back when he saw a stack of papers stashed in the bush. “What is that?” he asked himself while pulling it out. “Rodney's lovesick and delusional personality is the biggest reason why no girl will ever love him. By Millie.”
This note got an upset reaction out of Rodney. “That's pretty hurtful, but I'm sure…” he sighed and flipped to the next page, and when he did, a huge gasp was let out. “She wrote about the others as well?!”
“I need you to help us vote off Millie. She’s been writing hurtful things about all of us.” Rodney yelled down the toilet where Geoff was snorkeling and even flushed a note down the toilet in order for Geoff to read it.
Confessional: Geoff
“I can’t believe Millie would write that stuff about us. That stinks man,” Geoff sighed miserably while having his stench from being in the toilet visible.
Confessional Ends
“We need you so we can vote off Millie. I found out that she writes bad things about us!” Rodney hollered up at the tree branch where Brick was climbing. After that, the tree branch unceremoniously dropped to the ground, and Rodney gave Brick his note.
The shot cut ahead to Eva twirling her key in her finger as she sat on the steps of her cabin. She was stopped by Rodney passing her her own insulting piece of paper, and a glare donned.
Next, Damien's clue - a picture of a rabbit and key - was on display before the cautious boy put it away and looked at the rabbit. Damien grinned and pulled a carrot out of his pocket, attracting the rabbit before he hurled it, making the creature run after it.
Damien picked up his key, and when he did, he felt a tap on his shoulder that made him look back at Rodney. The big boy gave him his paper and whispered everything to him before the camp loudspeakers squeaked on. "Alright, campers!" Chris announced. "Meet me at the campfire in ten! And bring your keys!"
Confessional: Rodney
“I don't want to believe that Millie really meant what she said, but until she explains herself, I'll have to believe otherwise,” Rodney confessed.
Confessional Ends
The static cut to a shot of Geoff sitting glumly on a stump at the campfire pit while holding his key. The camera panned over to show the other campers keeping their distance due to his odor.
“Hey, guys!” Izzy arrived with the snake still around her, the only difference being that her eye had turned pink. “What stinks?”
The contestants were shocked to see what was happening. “Izzy, you've got a snake on your head,” Eva pointed out.
“I know, but don't worry. He's friendly,” Izzy assured before the snake chomped on her head again, and the teens gasped. “See? Kisses,” the wild child said and fell over.
"Yarr," Chris interrupted, the camera panning over to show him with a boot on the end of a row of chests. "It be time to claim your treasure! Those fortunate enough to bear a precious key," he said as the other campers were shown watching expectantly, "come forth with it!" He showed a group of eleven identical treasure chests arranged beneath the entrance post, six on each side and five on the other.
The first key used was in the hands of Brick, a mix of surprise and disappointment appearing on his face as he saw what he'd won. "Is this the best you can do?" he exclaimed, holding up the bag of chips and lone candy bar that had been hidden within. Chris nodded impishly.
Next was Millie, who was oddly zoomed in. She fiddled with one of the locks, but it didn't open. “My key isn't opening any chests," she told the host.
"Oh, yeah," Chris told her with a laugh. "I forgot to mention that some of the keys don't open up any chests!"
The shot now revealed that Millie was partly inside the bear's mouth. “Seriously?!” the author griped. “Can you do something about the bear?” Chris shot tranquilizer darts at the bear, and they both fell down.
Trent and Damien were shown retrieving their prizes from their chests. The former was not impressed to have received a toaster, while the latter held up a gift basket with a gold-bordered red card sticking out prominently.
"An invincibility pass?" Damien noticed as he picked it up. “This means I'm safe from being eliminated tonight! Thanks!" he called out to the host.
Sky opened her chest and happily withdrew a pair of two-Liter soda bottles, looking over to Priya, who stood with an accordion, and Eva, who'd won a lamp in the shape of a woman's leg.
Geoff was next, reaching into his chest and taking out a can of cologne. "What the...?”
Chris propped himself into the camera's view. “Geoff will be able to cover up that foul stench with a can of New Cleaver Body Spray. Cleaver. It cuts through the stink,” he advertised and escaped the shot.
“I just snorkeled in a septic tank for cologne?!” Geoff asked. “Nice!"
The camera panned across the campers and their treasure, or lack thereof. From left to right stood Eva looking annoyed with her lamp, Priya with her accordion, Trent and his toaster, a sad and empty-handed Rodney, Scott as empty handed as Rodney, Izzy with a purple box that had markings labeling it as an inkpen kit, Damien and his gift basket, a disappointed Millie, Sky and her soda, and Brick holding his bag of chips.
"I hope everyone got the treasure they were looking for," Chris told them in his normal voice, "and more! But now," the camera cut to his close-up, "it's time to do your duty and send one of you off the island, for good. So cast your votes," he told them before getting into his pirate persona one last time, "and I'll see ye buccaneers back at the campfire after sundown! Arr, ha-harrr."
Confessional: Rodney
"With Millie not saying anything to us, she's the one going home," Rodney said.
Confessional: Priya
“I can't believe she'd write about me and my parents like that,” Priya lamented.
Confessional: Brick
"Semper Fi, Millie," Brick said in the next outhouse clip.
Confessional: Izzy
"So I was called an insane psycho," Izzy mentioned before laughing. “It's funny because it's so true.”
Confessional: Millie
“With the amount of threats left in the game, I doubt I'll be leaving,” Millie said as she wrote in her book, only to flip ahead and see the missing pages. “What happened to my last pages?”
Confessional: Scott
"So far, my plan is working out well," Scott smiled. "I returned Millie's notebook back under her pillow. I have no use for it anymore."
Confessionals End
The Campfire Ceremony opened, cutting from the usual shot of the island to a shot of Chris from behind the campers. Rodney and Brick were seated closest to the camera, with Scott, Izzy, and Eva sitting in the row in front of them.
"And now, the moment we've all been waiting for," Chris began. "The moment of truth." He revealed the tray of treats from behind his back and smiled. "Marshmallow time! You know the routine," he said as the viewpoint shifted to the side of the campers, focusing on Eva, Rodney, Izzy, Scott, and Priya. "Whoever doesn't get a marshmallow, it's curtains for you!"
One by one, the contestants’ nervous faces were shown. First Brick, then Geoff, then Priya, back to Chris narrowing his eyes, then Rodney, and back to a close-up of the marshmallows as the host's fingers reached for the first one. More campers were shown, from an anxious Millie, to Damien in his invincibility-induced confidence, the glaring Scott, narrow-eyed Eva, and patient Sky.
The focus shifted back to the smiling host as he called off names in quick succession, tossing the marshmallows across the fire as he did. "Damien, Izzy, Geoff, Brick, Sky, Rodney, Priya, Eva, Trent, Scott, marshmallows for the lot of ya!"
As the safe campers happily received their treats, the camera focused in on an increasingly shocked Millie. She looked over to the host and his tray, only to see it gleaming and empty. "Sorry, but you're out," Chris told the eliminated contestant.
"Why did you guys even eliminate me?" Millie asked.
“After what you wrote in your notebook, how could you even ask that?!” Damien asked incredulously.
"What are you talking about, and how did you even read my journal?" Millie said angrily.
“I found your pages in the bushes after finishing my shower,” Rodney explained, equally as furious, “Here’s what I found.” He then shoved his page in her face.
Millie read the paper. "Hold on. This is my handwriting, but I don't remember writing this."
“Sure you didn’t,” Rodney scoffed. “Just leave already.”
Millie was hurt to hear this until Priya stepped in to defend her. “Hold on, Rodney,” she said. “I know you're upset, but can you just hear Millie out? She may be telling the truth.”
"But she wrote about you as well and said that you're weird," Rodney brought up.
“I know. What was written really hurt me, but I don’t think Millie would be lying to us if she was already exposed,” Priya explained.
"And also, if I kept my book a secret, then why would I even leave pages around for anybody to look at?" Millie defended herself.
"That's... a pretty good point," Trent said in realization. “Millie was likely set up by one of us.”
"Even if I was framed, it's too late to change what happened," Millie said. “I may be heading home, but it was great being here. I managed to grow more as a person and I'm even dating someone that's waiting for me outside the show now.”
“That’s great Millie…” Rodney smiled before feeling guilty. “I’m sorry about getting you eliminated and being rude to you. I don't like being made fun of.”
“And don't worry. We will find out who made you look bad,” Brick comforted her. “Framing is something I do not condone.”
“I'd appreciate that, and I forgive all of you,” Millie said to her friends. “I'll make sure to be more protective of my own possessions.”
“Millie!” Chris startled the writer by standing next to her. “You have an appointment at The Dock of Shame and a ticket for the Boat of Losers. Let's go.”
Millie walked off to the docks, but not before waving goodbye to the remaining campers, who also gave their goodbyes to her as she left.
"Now that fiasco was definitely dramatic," Chris said with a smile. "Well, that's it for tonight! I'll see you tomorrow."
Confessional: Scott
“Yeah, I better stay under the radar next episode. Don’t wanna cause suspicion after all,” Scott chuckled.
Confessional: Izzy
“If Millie’s notebook had the same contents as those papers Scott took, then he is obviously the one behind Millie’s framing,” Izzy’s eyes widened in shock, “I'll try and tell everyone when I have the chance to, and even if they'll think I’m lying, I'm not throwing in the towel.”
Confessionals End
(Roll the Credits)
Topher - 22nd
Anne Maria - 21st
MK - 20th
Justin - 19th
Katie - 18th
Sadie - 17th
Izzy - RETURNED
Rodney - RETURNED
Jasmine - 16th
Ripper - 15th
Sam - 14th
Chase - 13th
MERGE
Gwen - 12th
Millie - 11th
Boys: Brick, Damien, Geoff, Rodney, Scott, Trent
Girls: Eva, Izzy, Priya, Sky

So, I am on a PLL binge-read and watched the Lavendertowne ‘By the Book' YouTube video. It was fun and her art is cute, the girls are much more like their book versions than their show counterparts, but I noticed a few mistakes that affected their appearance.
Namely, the issue is that Lavender doesn’t differentiate between descriptions of the girls at age 13 and at 16, when in the books both Aria and more noticeably Hanna have changed a lot appearance-wise in the three years that passed. Lavender also doesn’t seem to have realised that Rosewood Day is a private school and has uniforms which means their outfits are a combination of their school uniform and their casual clothes.
I decided to go through Book 1 (PLL), with a few things from Book 2 (FL) and the supplementary novel Ali's Pretty Little Lies (APLL) to separate their physical descriptions by age as well as some outfit descriptions for anyone who would be interested!
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School Uniforms:
The school uniform features a “white” “Rosewood Oxford shirt” (PLL), which is a “button-down” collared shirt (PLL). It likely has the school logo above the breast pocket as is common in a lot of private school uniforms, and this logo is what marks it as specifically a Rosewood Day School shirt.
The standard issue (PLL) school skirt when described as worn by Hanna; is a “blue plaid” and by Emily as “pleated”. (PLL). Noel Khan in the same uniform is wearing a “Rosewood Day sweater vest and tie” (PLL). The school ties are most likely blue to match their school uniform skirts. Rosewood blazers are mentioned as being worn by Ezra in PLL, and the uniform blazer is mentioned again in Flawless by Aria. Though not stated based on the uniforms I have worn in school, the blazers are also most likely to be blue.
In APLL we learn Rosewood has a “Rosewood Day shark mascot” which is blue.
Despite the formal school outfits, the students do appear to be able to get away with some personalization – which mainly appears to come in the form of footwear and accessories.
Hanna wears the uniform with her skirt rolled up shorter with “purple platform wedge heels” (PLL). These shoes are possibly Hanna's favourites, earlier in PLL Hanna wears them as casual wear and specifies they are “Micheal Kors” from “Saks” Fifth Avenue (PLL). They are also specifically her “back to school shoes.” (FL)
On the first day back, Aria wears her uniform with “chunky Bakelite bracelets” and “brown scuffed lace-up boots” (PLL). Later in the same week, she is mentioned wearing a “chunky coral necklace” with “hot-pink nails” and an “oversized lime-green tote” bag. In Flawless we get another description of the ways Aria customizes her uniform look when she wears a “Neon blue puffer vest”, and a rolled-up/shortened uniform skirt, with “black leggings and funky royal blue ballet flats”. In this look, Aria wears her hair in a “cheerleader-style ponytail.”
Spencer gets a little description in flawless we learn she wears her uniform with a camisole and boots. She is also self-conscious about wearing the same outfit two days in a row despite it being a uniformed school, which suggests wearing different shoes and accessories every day is expected socially from Rosewood students.
Emily gets a brief description of her wearing her uniform, she wears a tank top under her Rosewood Day school shirt.
Casual wear and appearance: Ages 13 and 16.
Aria Montogomery
Aria is described generally as having a “coltish, ballet-dancer frame, straight black hair, and pouty lips” (PLL). Coltish can be used to describe someone long and lean. Her hair is specified as “blue-black” (FL) and her haircut is “long, shaggy” (PLL) with long bangs (PLL, FL). We know from Hanna that Aria has a larger chest at both 16 and 13 as she developed earlier than the other girls (PLL). Her eyes are “Ice blue” (FL).
At 13 years old Aria had “pink-striped hair” (PLL) and a “fake nose ring” (PLL). From 11 to 13, Aria went through several phases in her fashion style “punk Aria, artsy Aria” and “documentary film Aria”. At 13 she wore a “pink mohair” (FL) bra, and she knitted matching ones for her friends. (PLL). Another description states that “Aria had put a blue streak in her hair and wore a silver sequined shirt, blue flare-leg jeans, and clunky wedges.” (APLL)
At 16 years old, Aria has settled on a style, a “bohemian-hipster-girl thing, with lots of layers, lace-up boots, and APC [brand] jeans” (PLL). The boots are likely the same as her scuffed brown boots worn in school (PLL). Aria also wears a “Kelly green alpaca shrug” (PLL) and in her free time, she is working on making herself a beaded and sequin hat (PLL). Though not worn together, this makes up enough items to describe one casual outfit for Aria.
In PLL we get a full outfit description of Aria’s outfit to the Noel Khan party, when she wears “a tight, faded red University of Iceland T-shirt, a frayed denim mini, and red John Fluevog cowboy boots. Her black hair was pulled back into a high ponytail.”
At the funeral we get another full outfit description “Aria wore a blue, purple, and fuchsia-striped cotton boat-neck dress, a navy velvet jacket, and cowboy boots” (PLL), she is also wearing her old mohair bra. (TBH this makes the show Liars funeral outfits seem appropriate).
At Foxy (FL) Arias's exact dress is described, she is wearing the Luella Bartley for Target Polka Dot dress, which can be seen on this eBay listing.
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Hanna Marin
Hanna underwent a big physical transformation between 13 and 16. At 13 she wore “braces with pink rubber bands”, she also wore glasses (FL). Hanna had frizzy (FL) “washed-out brown” hair (PLL) and was chubby (PLL, APPL, etc…) with “bad skin” (FL). She wore “slightly-too-small Blue Cult jeans” (FL) or a “French Connection mini-dress that was, unfortunately, way too small on her.” (APLL)
At 16 Hanna has undergone significant weight loss. She now wears a “size 2” jean (PLL) and is “model thin” but still “curvy” (PLL). Her hair is described as “long, red-brown hair” (PLL) and “a dark auburn” (FL), “despite her braces, one bottom front tooth crossed over a canine.” (FL). Her eyes are “amber” brown (PLL). Hanna talks about how she discovered de-frizzing products (FL) and when she is distressed and has less time to get dressed up her hair is described as “kinky” (FL) suggesting she has some natural curl to her hair.
One mention of her in casual wear mentions she wears jeans and a stretched-out cashmere sweater (PLL), and in another, she once again wears her “Michael Kors purple wedges” and a “mini skirt” (PLL). She carries with her a “Louis Vuitton cherry-monogrammed coin purse” (PLL) and of course, the stolen “silver” “Tiffany charm bracelet” and earrings which come from the Tiffany Toggle set (PLL). We also know that she has previously shoplifted “baby tees from Ralph Lauren” (PLL), which all together could make up a possible outfit for Hanna.
In the Khan party scene (PLL), we get a full outfit description when Hanna wears a “navy” “BCBG slip dress”, “strappy pale blue Christian Louboutin sandals” and a “blue quilted Moschino bag”. At Allison's funeral, Hanna wears a “skimpy black V-neck dress” and stockings. (PLL)
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Spencer Hastings
Spencer has “long dark-blond” hair (PLL) which is worn “sleek” at 13 and “wavy” at 16. In Ali’s Pretty Little Lies, Spencer’s eye colour is described as blue (though in other books they are green. >!Her half-sibling Ali also has blue eyes with “green flecks” (APLL) the changes to Spencer's eye colour over time may have been to better show off her and Ali’s physical similarities !<
At 16 Spencer is described wearing a “tight ecru Lacoste tennis dress” and “diamond earrings” (PLL). At age 13, Spencer and Ali argued over a “Lacoste polo dress at Neiman Marcus” (PLL) which she wore with “Tory Burch flats” (APLL). It is possible that this is the same dress, hence its tightness, or that Spencer has not changed in the brands and styles she prefers.
Her casual outfits at 16, (aside from Lacoste dresses), include a “Marc Jacobs pale blue wool coat” and “navy blue Wolford patterned stockings” (PLL). We also learn that her “everyday look” is a “Thomas Pink striped button-down and Citizen’s jeans.” (PLL).
In another scene, we get a full outfit description when she wears a “black French Connection baby tee, short track-star gray sweat shorts from Villanova” and a “Tiffany Elsa Peretti heart ring” (FL). Her hair was “pulled back in a low, messy ponytail; wisps hanging around her face”. (PLL)
At Ali’s funeral, she wears a “charcoal suit and ballet flats” (PLL).
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Emily Fields
Emily is described as having “chlorine-damaged hair” (PLL), that is described as a “slightly greenish shade of reddish-blond” (PLL) and “reddish brown” (PLL). She has hazel eyes (FL) and has freckles with “stubby eyelashes” (PLL). From Maya, we learn that Emily “totally has” swimmer “shoulders” (PLL), which likely means broad, rounded, and muscular. At 16 Emily is also self-conscious about her body, “strong, muscular, and not as slender as it used to be.” (PLL). Emily has a helix cartilage piercing she got at 13 to match with Ali, and at 16 still wears her “silver hoop”.
In flashbacks, at 13 years old she had “skinny hips”, and outfit wise “never wore anything tight or remotely cute” (PLL) due to her parents’ rules. In APLL Ali makes a point that when Emily ‘dresses up’ her jeans no longer have holes in them, suggesting she usually wears ripped jeans. On the day Ali disappeared, she was also wearing “a non-descript blue t-shirt” (APLL) and “blah jeans” (PLL) which is described in Ali’s Pretty Little Lies as an outfit Emily wore often and repeatedly; a “uniform of baggy jeans and a plain blue T-shirt”.
A second outfit she (may) has worn at 13 years old is ‘The Irish Girls Do It Better baby tee’ (PLL) which from Flawless we learned the shirt belonged to Aria and Emily took it when they did a wardrobe swap. Emily also mentions having Allison's old “citizen corduroys” (PLL) which no longer fit her at 16.
At 16, we get a few descriptions of Emily and her outfits, after swim practice in PLL she changes into a “T-shirt and jeans”. She wears “leopard print earmuffs” (a gift from Ali) on cold days in winter (PLL) At Ali’s funeral, she wears a “black, pleated, too-short Gap skirt” (PLL)
At the Noel Khan party, Emily wears a “polo shirt” and “worn blue Converse All-Stars” with a “messy ponytail.” To Foxy Emily wore a “strapless pink dress” with a “pink pashmina thrown over her shoulders.” (FL)
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The books are generally set in the year they were written/published, meaning the girls are also wearing very distinctively early 2000s fashions at the start of the series. Rosewood is also an area filled with rich suburbanites, and their popular brands and styles read very much prep or ‘old money’ (PLL). Though their wealth won’t have changed, I am interested to know if anyone who owns the newer updated versions of the books can say if their outfits are different. Aria’s Foxy dress and Spencer’s everyday look especially seem heavily dated to the early 2000s, in styles that haven’t been picked up by the Y2K re-emergence, so I am wondering if the clothes too were updated alongside the references.
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