Well I guess that I have to start somewhere, so why not the end! I’ve been disowned for the umpteenth time by my parents (or rather by my mum because over the years, Dad has just learned to go along with whatever she says out of duress!) This has all been as a result of my having visited them in Hay ( a 700 kilometre round trip might I add) because my Dad’s brother passed away this week and it was Mother’s Day. I thought that I’d go to show my condolences and to wish my mother and sister who also lives there a happy Mother’s Day and bring them all some hand made gifts, I’m a bit sentimental like that.
I have taken to the craft of making pebble art. The gift that I made for my mother was of an image depicting my family with my parents, my sister and I and my brother who’s passed away, as he is handing my mum a bunch of flowers. I made one for my dad depicting he and my Nan (his mother) fishing at their favourite fishing spot; my Nan passed away just last month as well and I thought it’d be a nice gesture, then I gave my sister one as well with a quote about sisters being joined by the heart.
The first day, Friday, that my husband, daughter and I came there was okay. It always is especially when I’ve not seen them for six months or more! We catch up, mum talks about her very many health conditions, she then complains a little bit about everything and everyone but it’s not over the top at this point because she and my dad are kept busy opening gifts and seemingly happy to see us! But we had decided before coming that we were going to stay in separate accommodation for the weekend with the knowledge that things with my mother usually go sour very quickly! And if we’re not having to stay at their home when it does then we can at least retain some mental stability throughout our trip! This would normally be a point in which I’d let out a bit of a chuckle or if I’m texting or writing a social media post, that I’d add the LOL at the end of that statement, simply due to the stupid realisation that unfortunately it is so very true that it’s almost comical, remembering in my mind the very many times that her very predictable unstable behaviour kicks in at around the 24 hour mark and doesn’t often dissipate until well after we’ve left if not months later! I have no clue as to why I’m still surprised by this occurrence?! Perhaps it’s because it is so unbelievably erratic and shocking to anyone that witnesses it that still even now it’s hard not only to watch unfold but to believe!
But sadly as a result of these personally flips, she lashes out in anger, she can become nasty and callous, her comments are cold and uncaring, she can become physically aggressive, and the damage done during these times can be hard to ever overcome, especially if she aims any comment or remark at you! It is during these times that you know in your soul that she has not a single care for you, not an ounce, and that the only attention or compassion shown towards you as her child or friend is one of obligation out of her need to keep up appearances with those who are still weaved in her web of “social media” deception! She wouldn’t dare lift a finger for anyone in person! But just the fact that we pre decided to obtain alternative accommodation was possibly one of the triggers I was already prepared would set her off, as we would usually choose to stay with her and dad in their spare room over crowded with belongings of the past and present, not unlike the rest of their home.
With this alone, one would see that she has an overwhelming need to retain old memories, be them bad or good. She still literally keeps every ounce of clothing I’ve ever passed on to her since well before I had children which was 27 years ago! Looking in her wardrobe, there are outfits there I remember her wearing when I was a teenager! Her bathroom still retains the $2 gifts (still in their packaging) that us kids bought for her from school Mother’s Day stalls, and the Mary Kay makeup I used to steal when I was attending high school!
Her kitchen still holds the Amway cookware she purchased for hundreds of dollars before I can remember! And to make matters worse, even some of the food in her pantry is from supermarkets no longer operating! Over the years, her hoarding has been a bit of a thorn in dad’s side, having lived a life of drifting from house to house, town to town, moving around as often as they have, having to cart it all along with them and something us kids (myself, my brother and sister) have always found funny to pick on her about, but in writing this, it is easy to see that her need to keep the past fresh in her mind and under her nose is a sickness all In itself.
Whilst we were visiting, we visited my sister in her little unit. It’s like walking back into the 70s and equally as much as a step back in time like my mother’s house! My sister has been diagnosed with schizophrenia which when first diagnosed was apparently drug induced, however; going from the lifestyle we were forced to live as the children to my parents and their lifestyle choices plus my brother and I having been diagnosed with conditions and disorders of our own, putting the puzzle pieces together as to how we’ve all accumulated mental health diagnoses isn’t that difficult taking into consideration that neither one of my parents exerted any kind of maternal instincts at all! And not even as us kids have grown and struggled through our lives, we had always been told by them that once we turned 18 we’d no longer be their “problem” anymore!
My sister’s name is Julie. She moved in with my mum and dad after one of her countless admissions to the psychiatric hospital in Bendigo, having absconded from their independent living facility which is meant to be a monitored introduction back into society after a mental health admission, but she always left before she gave the chance for them to find her accommodation that wasn’t with her abusive ex husband and 4 children.
Sitting down with her in her home, hearing all about the time she’s lived in Hay both with and near my parents, how our mum would bail her up sometimes (which had happened recently) even physically, how she’s thrown dishes at her and how she abuses her denying her food for being overweight on a daily basis… how she calls her fat and crazy… there’s literally a Myriad of abuse in all its forms being dished out to Julie, and yet, because she has nowhere else to go, like the situation my brother was in living with them on and off before he passed away (under questionable circumstances in my opinion) she has no choice but to endure it… and it saddens me to hear about it all let alone see it going on right before my eyes! Especially when the exact same denigrating comments about being useless, overweight, a waste of a life and criticism about the way she’s living her life, the choices she’s making and what she chooses to eat etc etc was also drilled into my brother by my parents and whispered to all that they spoke too for many many years before by brother lost his life.
I know through my own experience having lived with her that her poisonous mouth can lead a person to questioning your mere existence, your reason for living and remove all self esteem in a single spat with her! In 2013 I took an overdose due to a gross level of mental health issues and past trauma which I couldn’t deal with. My parents were living with us at the time and my youngest daughter exhibited some challenging behaviours… my mum found it difficult to cope with her however she made no attempt at patience or compassion and so in a fleeting moment she’s said to my daughter “if I was your mother I would’ve killed myself a long time ago!”
Wow! Just WOW! The above mentioned examples of how toxic my mother is… after only explaining to you the very tip of the iceberg in these few paragraphs, even I am second guessing writing this at all, and I’m finding it hard to fathom how I can rehash the past and get into more detail about the really bad situations! Not to mention, go into my life right from childhood until now with her and my father which is yet to come!
Writing this down, whether I share it here or not is going to be a huge journey for me that’ll take a lot of courage and open some really raw emotions… bring back old memories that I’ve suppressed and disassociated myself from… there will undoubtedly be many trigger points that I will go into which some people might become affected by, including me, but mine is a life that was, is and continues to be a challenge day in and day out… it’s something I’ve had to survive, a life and reality that I still struggle so much with but least attempt to cope with and in some way, I hope that my story will be able to shine a light on just how the importance of love, attention, affection and nurturing in our childhood really do mould the person we eventually become…

So, this has been going on for 5 years and I'm reaching the point of explosion!!!!!
I'm (35) married to my husband (55)
He has a son (22) who has just gotten married to his wife (20). His son is a narcissist and has been that way since the day I met him. He is very talented at a number of things (motocross, golf, etc.) And he is a hard worker. By all outward appearances he's a good person and can be very kind at times.
The issue is that he is very spoiled and has always been given the best of the best. ($1,200 phones, $7,000 dirtbikes, the nicest clothes and shoes and blah blah blah)
His mother is loaded and buys him cars, clothes, coach backpacks, $400 shoes for no reason, spends $2,000+ on his birthdays and Christmases and just bows down to his every want and need
I was raised with the power getting shut off every 3 months bc my single mother struggled to keep the lights on. I shopped (and still shop) at thrift stores and I've NEVER cared about having flashy expensive THINGS. There is more to life than stuff.
Anyway... his son will always say things like "where did you get that shirt? Wish?" He will pick on me about my hobbies. Pretty much saying the things I enjoy doing are lame.
If I started talking about politics or any kind of REAL issues going on in the world he would dismiss what I'm saying and say that I'm a conspiracy theorist (meanwhile, his world revolves around tic-tok and video games)
After he got married things have gotten much worse. Keep in mind, his wife is 20 and I'm 35.
He will compare how she looks to how I look. We went on a boat trip and she wore a bathing suit while I wore shorts and a tank top. I'm not fat by any means, but I would LOVE to lose around 15lbs and have the flat little tummy I once did.
His wife is 4 inches taller than me and has huge boobs and a completely different body style. I never once compared myself to her or envied her in any way, but he will say things to me like "how much do weigh?" And then ask her how much she weighs...and then say "how do you guys look so different when your only 5-10lbs difference" he makes me so self conscious and insecure comparing me to someone who is 15 years younger than me FOR NO REASON EXCEPT TO HURT ME.
She says things to me too.
We were playing pickle ball today. First time I ever played and I was doing so-so
My team was behind and she hollered out to my team mate "do you want me to come out there and take her place" (talking about me)
If I try to have a discussion with her about anything she will find some way to argue with Mr and tell me I'm wrong and it's impossible to have any kind of real diologue with her UNLESS IT IS ABOUT HER AND HER INTERESTS
It gets worse
Me and my husband have a 4 year old daughter who was born with a cleft pallette in the roof of her mouth and she's had surgeries and is taking speech therapy and is doing great
Well, my stepson and his wife just had a baby (5 months)
My stepson (in front of like 6 people/family members) said to me "our son is perfect, what's the matter, why can't you have a perfect baby too"? THAT IS HIS FUKKIN SISTER!!!!!
I race motocross with them every weekend. It's my husband's son/family and we see them often
LITERALLY EVERY SINGLE TIME WE SEE THEM ONE (OR BOTH) SAY SOMETHING CRUEL TO ME.
I'm a very encouraging person. My stepsons wife gained a lot of weight after her pregnancy and when she started losing the weight I'd tell her "you look so pretty today" or "you look great"
I have TRIED to lead by example and treat them how I want to me treated.
They NEVER tell me "good job" or say anything nice/positive to me. They feed off of hurting and picking on other people to make themselves feel better. They talk shut constantly and I'm nothing like that and don't want to be.
I smile and pretend things dont hurt me so that I don't rock the boat. I don't stand up for myself and don't even know how to.
Normally when I'm around toxic people like this I avoid them and cut them out of my life, but I'm at a loss for ideas and don't know how to move forward.
Any advice or encouragement would be most welcome. I've talked to my husband but he doesn't know how to handle it and doesn't want to talk to his son because his son picks on him too and my husband doesn't seem to care. I don't think he understands why I am so hurt/upset by it in the first place.
Mt husband always says "he was just joking" or "he didn't mean it"....THE GASLIGHTING IS UNBELIEVABLE!!!!!
Thanks for letting me vent. God bless you all.

Well I guess that I have to start somewhere, so why not the end! I’ve been disowned for the umpteenth time by my parents (or rather by my mum because over the years, Dad has just learned to go along with whatever she says out of duress!) This has all been as a result of my having visited them in Hay ( a 700 kilometre round trip might I add) because my Dad’s brother passed away this week and it was Mother’s Day. I thought that I’d go to show my condolences and to wish my mother and sister who also lives there a happy Mother’s Day and bring them all some hand made gifts, I’m a bit sentimental like that.
I have taken to the craft of making pebble art. The gift that I made for my mother was of an image depicting my family with my parents, my sister and I and my brother who’s passed away, as he is handing my mum a bunch of flowers. I made one for my dad depicting he and my Nan (his mother) fishing at their favourite fishing spot; my Nan passed away just last month as well and I thought it’d be a nice gesture, then I gave my sister one as well with a quote about sisters being joined by the heart.
The first day, Friday, that my husband, daughter and I came there was okay. It always is especially when I’ve not seen them for six months or more! We catch up, mum talks about her very many health conditions, she then complains a little bit about everything and everyone but it’s not over the top at this point because she and my dad are kept busy opening gifts and seemingly happy to see us! But we had decided before coming that we were going to stay in separate accommodation for the weekend with the knowledge that things with my mother usually go sour very quickly! And if we’re not having to stay at their home when it does then we can at least retain some mental stability throughout our trip! This would normally be a point in which I’d let out a bit of a chuckle or if I’m texting or writing a social media post, that I’d add the LOL at the end of that statement, simply due to the stupid realisation that unfortunately it is so very true that it’s almost comical, remembering in my mind the very many times that her very predictable unstable behaviour kicks in at around the 24 hour mark and doesn’t often dissipate until well after we’ve left if not months later! I have no clue as to why I’m still surprised by this occurrence?! Perhaps it’s because it is so unbelievably erratic and shocking to anyone that witnesses it that still even now it’s hard not only to watch unfold but to believe!
But sadly as a result of these personally flips, she lashes out in anger, she can become nasty and callous, her comments are cold and uncaring, she can become physically aggressive, and the damage done during these times can be hard to ever overcome, especially if she aims any comment or remark at you! It is during these times that you know in your soul that she has not a single care for you, not an ounce, and that the only attention or compassion shown towards you as her child or friend is one of obligation out of her need to keep up appearances with those who are still weaved in her web of “social media” deception! She wouldn’t dare lift a finger for anyone in person! But just the fact that we pre decided to obtain alternative accommodation was possibly one of the triggers I was already prepared would set her off, as we would usually choose to stay with her and dad in their spare room over crowded with belongings of the past and present, not unlike the rest of their home.
With this alone, one would see that she has an overwhelming need to retain old memories, be them bad or good. She still literally keeps every ounce of clothing I’ve ever passed on to her since well before I had children which was 27 years ago! Looking in her wardrobe, there are outfits there I remember her wearing when I was a teenager! Her bathroom still retains the $2 gifts (still in their packaging) that us kids bought for her from school Mother’s Day stalls, and the Mary Kay makeup I used to steal when I was attending high school!
Her kitchen still holds the Amway cookware she purchased for hundreds of dollars before I can remember! And to make matters worse, even some of the food in her pantry is from supermarkets no longer operating! Over the years, her hoarding has been a bit of a thorn in dad’s side, having lived a life of drifting from house to house, town to town, moving around as often as they have, having to cart it all along with them and something us kids (myself, my brother and sister) have always found funny to pick on her about, but in writing this, it is easy to see that her need to keep the past fresh in her mind and under her nose is a sickness all In itself.
Whilst we were visiting, we visited my sister in her little unit. It’s like walking back into the 70s and equally as much as a step back in time like my mother’s house! My sister has been diagnosed with schizophrenia which when first diagnosed was apparently drug induced, however; going from the lifestyle we were forced to live as the children to my parents and their lifestyle choices plus my brother and I having been diagnosed with conditions and disorders of our own, putting the puzzle pieces together as to how we’ve all accumulated mental health diagnoses isn’t that difficult taking into consideration that neither one of my parents exerted any kind of maternal instincts at all! And not even as us kids have grown and struggled through our lives, we had always been told by them that once we turned 18 we’d no longer be their “problem” anymore!
My sister’s name is Julie. She moved in with my mum and dad after one of her countless admissions to the psychiatric hospital in Bendigo, having absconded from their independent living facility which is meant to be a monitored introduction back into society after a mental health admission, but she always left before she gave the chance for them to find her accommodation that wasn’t with her abusive ex husband and 4 children.
Sitting down with her in her home, hearing all about the time she’s lived in Hay both with and near my parents, how our mum would bail her up sometimes (which had happened recently) even physically, how she’s thrown dishes at her and how she abuses her denying her food for being overweight on a daily basis… how she calls her fat and crazy… there’s literally a Myriad of abuse in all its forms being dished out to Julie, and yet, because she has nowhere else to go, like the situation my brother was in living with them on and off before he passed away (under questionable circumstances in my opinion) she has no choice but to endure it… and it saddens me to hear about it all let alone see it going on right before my eyes! Especially when the exact same denigrating comments about being useless, overweight, a waste of a life and criticism about the way she’s living her life, the choices she’s making and what she chooses to eat etc etc was also drilled into my brother by my parents and whispered to all that they spoke too for many many years before by brother lost his life.
I know through my own experience having lived with her that her poisonous mouth can lead a person to questioning your mere existence, your reason for living and remove all self esteem in a single spat with her! In 2013 I took an overdose due to a gross level of mental health issues and past trauma which I couldn’t deal with. My parents were living with us at the time and my youngest daughter exhibited some challenging behaviours… my mum found it difficult to cope with her however she made no attempt at patience or compassion and so in a fleeting moment she’s said to my daughter “if I was your mother I would’ve killed myself a long time ago!”
Wow! Just WOW! The above mentioned examples of how toxic my mother is… after only explaining to you the very tip of the iceberg in these few paragraphs, even I am second guessing writing this at all, and I’m finding it hard to fathom how I can rehash the past and get into more detail about the really bad situations! Not to mention, go into my life right from childhood until now with her and my father which is yet to come!
Writing this down, whether I share it here or not is going to be a huge journey for me that’ll take a lot of courage and open some really raw emotions… bring back old memories that I’ve suppressed and disassociated myself from… there will undoubtedly be many trigger points that I will go into which some people might become affected by, including me, but mine is a life that was, is and continues to be a challenge day in and day out… it’s something I’ve had to survive, a life and reality that I still struggle so much with but least attempt to cope with and in some way, I hope that my story will be able to shine a light on just how the importance of love, attention, affection and nurturing in our childhood really do mould the person we eventually become…

I met this girl about three years ago through another friend in the pandemic, we started playing online videogames during lockdown and we became good friends, we would talk and play practically daily. Then the lockdown ended and we started hanging out and i really felt good with her, i really liked her and became a good friend with her, i was always there to help when needed in anyway like whenever she needed to talk, or didn't have money... anything i could do for her i tried my best... even just had nice gestures with her just because.
I don't have many friends, not because i'm not a social person (wich i'm not), but because i am very selective with who i consider is a friend or an aquaintance, on the other hand she has a lot of friends, she does different more activities and knows many people.
I'm an affectionate person with the people i love (like my closest friends) and one of my love languages is close contact and showing affection directly like hugs and stuff like that. I tried to be like that with her as we grew confident but i think it felt forced to her so i decided to respect those boundaries.
Things started to fall apart when hanging out she met someone passing or our friends in common (we are from the same university) i noticed how she acted with them, she would greet them warmly, a hud and/or a kiss on the cheek and i couldn't help but compare myself to them and start overthinking and feeling lesser than others in her life, big mistake, but inevitable.
So i tried again to get that treatment, but i had to take the iniciative and in time it felt like she didn't feel like it and was uncomfortable, i got tired and decided to stop, in the end i didn't even greet or say goodbye the way she wanted.
I opted for communication to let her know what bothered me about that and other situations in an attempt to fix that, but nothing changed actually, i now think that i just gave her an ego boost.
Finally i decided to stop all contact with her and we never spoke again, she never tried to look for me again, not even to play videogames, wich we played all the time, never asked me about why i was acting like that, i don't know if she presented it or just didn't care.
It was about a year an a half ago and it still bothers me, a part of me misses her so much, another part of me resents her, some times after we cross paths i feel sad.
When we have seen eachother i have a feeling of resentment from her.
People often say ghosting is bad, but what else could i do? i did it for my own good, actually a psychologist validated that theory to me, i tried to protect myself from something that hurt me and i couldn't see how else to change that, but sometimes i tend to feel guilty for maybe being the bad guy.
IN MY DEFENSE, i recognize she appreciated in her way the things i did for her and how much i cared, i'm not saying i was waiting for reciprocity and for her to pay me back, i was just being a good person, i just wanted to feel appreciated, however as the psychologist said...it was about empathy, if she was a person that doesn't show love and doesn't like contact with anyone i would have to understand and respect her personality, but she wasn't, she could have been condescending to make me feel like she cared for me, i really love(d) her and i wanted her to be my friend as well and show it.
That was not the only reason though, there where some other problems like her tendency to try to gaslight me sometimes for example, but the most important reason was that.
Should i still feel guilty? did i hurt her? am i the bad guy?

I am NOT OOP, OOP is u/AdhesivenessMurky204
Originally posted to AITAH
AITAH for separating from my husband because he refused to get a vasectomy?
Thanks to u/queenlegolas and u/Direct-Caterpillar77 for suggesting this BoRU
Editor’s Note: added paragraph breaks for readability
Trigger Warnings: PTSD, mentions of abortion, domestic abuse, verbal abuse, sexual assault, rape
Original Post: April 28, 2024
My husband (28M, who I will call Jack) and I (27F) have been together for 4 years, we have 2 young children and I am pregnant again. I have been pregnant for what feels like most of our relationship. I got pregnant 4 months into our relationship. We got married a month before our daughter’s 1st birthday and ended up with a honeymoon baby. After our son was born, I talked to my OB and she put me on birth control and I have been taking it militantly.
My daughter is now 3 and my son is 2. A little over a month ago I discovered I am pregnant again, despite taking my birth control religiously. Abortion is banned in my state, and the pregnancy was discovered too far along to attempt to obtain one out of state. While Jack and I were nervous, we also love being parents and decided that 3 young kids would be a challenge, but 3 was a good number for us. Then we went in for the first ultrasound and got some unexpected news - it’s twins.
Things have been tough financially, and while we were stressed but excited for a third child, we were not expecting a third and fourth child. Beyond the finances, I am the primary caretaker and I know that twins is going to be a lot, three children under 5 is already a lot, but 4 children under 5 is going to be really really difficult for me. Physically, I am tired of being pregnant. I’ve been pregnant or breastfeeding the majority of our relationship. It’s exhausting, it feels awful, and I don’t recognize my body anymore.
Four children is enough. I don’t want more. I told Jack that I was done with pregnancy, I’ve been pregnant enough, I’ve been experimenting with different types of birth control for over a decade and I still can’t stop getting pregnant, abortion isn’t a valid option where we live, we need something more permanent. He agreed, and suggested an IUD, I told him no - if it did fail then it could cause an ectopic pregnancy which could kill me, especially where we live. I’ve had both control fail me multiple times already and I’m not taking the chance, so I suggested a vasectomy. He was not open to the idea, and was even upset that I suggested it and told me I should get my tubes tied. I told him a tubal ligation is a much bigger surgery and I could be recovering for weeks during which time I wouldn’t be able to work or take care of our 4 young children, but he could ice his balls for a day or two and be done with it. He told me that not getting pregnant was ultimately my responsibility, and topped it off by saying “that’s what your body your choice means, YOUR body, so YOU choose.” That’s when it went from a discussion to a full blown fight.
See, when I was 19 I had another birth control failure with my boyfriend at the time (who I will call Tom). I wanted an abortion, Tom did not because he was opposed. I told him I was getting the abortion since it was my body and my choice, and Tom said some horrible things to me, including threatening me. I broke up with him and got the abortion. In response, Tom ended up following me one night and attacking me. I don’t want to go into detail but it was horrible, and he ended up going to prison for a number of charges related to the attack. Not only do I have a number of scars and some long lasting physical effects, but I have PTSD as well.
Jack knows about my history and diagnosis, and has known from the beginning. I have a pretty prominent facial scar so I was upfront about it early on in our dating. Jack always presented himself as very pro-choice, so I was shocked that he would say that. I got really emotional and started crying and shouting, and it turned into a full-blown fight.
Eventually I said that birth control is a two-way street and so far I’ve been the only one managing it and he said “and now we have 2 kids and 2 more coming, great job.” I told him he sounded like Tom and he got super pissed, basically said how dare you compare me to him, and maybe he might want kids one day with someone who doesn’t compare him to her felon ex-boyfriend. I was stunned and horrified. I said “well then let’s not waste any fucking time,”then packed up myself and the kids and drove to my parents place.
It’s been about a week since the fight. I’ve spoken with Jack a few times and he has since apologized and said he was out of line and was speaking from a place of anxiety after finding out about the twins, but also that I said things that were out of line and it was wrong of me to insist he undergo a medical procedure. He said that can move on from the things I said and that he wants to see his children and be a family again. I told him no, that I didn’t want to “move on” from the things he said to me. I can’t just get over that and I think we need space apart. Jack was upset by this and while we talked I brought up getting a separation agreement to manage custody and finances while we figure things out. He did not like this suggestion, said we didn’t need to pull the courts into this.
I haven’t told a lot of people about what’s happening but my family and a couple close friends. My sister and best friend both think I should throw the whole man away, but my brother (who is the only other one married with kids) thinks that I’m being extreme for what sums up to a fight between two scared people who both said nasty things. My mom is trying to be supportive but is occasionally reminding me that I “don’t want to be a single mother of 4” and telling me not to let my PTSD drive my decisions, while my dad is being completely unhelpful (he thinks jokes are helpful - like calling me Doorknob because I “can’t stop getting knocked up”, telling me to let the oven cool down, real knee-slappers). I don’t know what to do. My kids are happy to be at grandma and grandpas house but they miss their daddy, I’m 4 months pregnant and already uncomfortable as hell, I wish I could go back to being a happy little family but I’m so hung up on the things he said in that fight. Am I destroying my family over one bad night? Am I being unreasonable for asking my husband to get a vasectomy?
Edit: I've noticed a lot of people recommending condoms. I have gotten pregnant with condoms twice. Our second child and my first pregnancy were both conceived using condoms properly (correct fit, put on correctly, single use, not expired, no breaks, etc). I do not trust condoms enough to not fail a third time. I know the failure rate is supposedly small, but it's not personally small enough for me. Edit to the edit: I'm sorry, I didn't expect so many comments so fast and I can't keep up with them. By the first pregnancy I mean the pregnancy with Tom. With Jack I was on the patch when I got pregnant with our daughter, condoms with our son, and the pill with the twins. So far I haven't ever suspected that Jack has tampered with our birth control and always presumed that I'm a fertile Myrtle.
I recognize the comments and just want people to know I'm seeing the suggestion. I'm not dismissing it, but the thought of it is deeply upsetting and has provoked a lot of anxiety. I just wanted to make it clear that if the suggestion is only based on the condoms, that the condom pregnancies were with two different partners. While I know I always used condoms properly with Tom, I do believe that Tom could have been fully capable of sabotaging the condoms.
AITAH has no consensus bot, OOP received mixed reactions of NTAs and YTAs
Relevant Comments
deepsleepsheepmeep: NTA. Your husband is though. Your body has already been through A LOT. A tubal ligation is a serious surgery and you are right about being out of commission for a while when recovering. If he is more concerned with an imaginary future wife than he is for you, I don’t think there is much hope for this marriage.
We have 4 close friends who all got vasectomies. None of them bitched about it like your wimp of a husband. We actually had fun vasectomy themed parties for them.
On the off chance he does end up getting a vasectomy, make sure to do the follow up appointments. One of the vasectomy fab 4 did not follow through and ended up with a post-vasectomy baby.

OOP: Thank you, I feel like this is a lot of what has been so upsetting has been that he's thinking about some imaginary future wife when I'm right here, his actual wife, the mother of his children. It's like he's already imagining a future without me.

 
Update: AITAH for separating from my husband because he refused to get a vasectomy?: May 3, 2024
I didn’t expect so many comments and literally couldn’t go through them all. It seemed like the majority of people said I was NTA but I did get a lot of YTAs telling me I was trying to force him to get a medical procedure and telling me to get one instead. Besides already addressing my reasonings why I made my request in the original post (which I want you to read with real "per my last email" energy), I in no way am *forcing* him to have a medical procedure, but I am saying that I do not want to be with a partner who is not willing to be snipped. This is an issue of compatibility. The number of children you want, the methods of birth control you’re willing to use, those are issues of compatibility and a reason relationships end all the time. If he doesn’t want to be sterilized that’s fine, but then that means that we’re not compatible anymore, since it means he wants more children and I don’t. Beyond that there were some YTA comments and some DMs that were just nasty, calling me a murderer and saying my body is a cemetery. Sadly enough, I expected those types of comments, because I know there are a lot of Toms out in the world.
First I wanted to address a couple things that kept coming up, because last post turned into thousands of comments that all said about 5 different things, so to avoid my inbox becoming another echo chamber:

You’re 100% going to have a C-section anyway so just get a tubal while giving birth.

No, I’m not 100% going to have a C-section anyway. Twins are not an automatic C-section. With my birth history there is no reason to presume that a C-section is in my future. My OB agrees, and has discussed the possibility as doctors have to do but also said that based on my past two birth experiences, I'm a "perfect candidate" for vaginal delivery.
I also am not going to mince words: tubal ligations are *less* effective than vasectomies with a *much higher* likelihood of an ectopic pregnancy. Ectopic pregnancy can *kill me*. In fact I got a PM from a woman who is a fellow fertile Myrtle who had an ectopic after a tubal. I am rejecting birth control options that, if they fail, would lead to my likely death. I don’t want to be pregnant again but I also don’t want to die and leave my children motherless, and in no way should anyone assume that traveling to another state to obtain an emergency abortion will continue to be an option in the future - we live in scary times, and Gilead is a real possibility. The comments seemed to have the vibe that people think that ligations are magically more effective than vasectomies and vasectomies are more of a whisper of sterility than an actual sterilization method so for those in the back VASECTOMIES ARE MORE EFFECTIVE THAN TUBAL LIGATIONS, FULL STOP. So I really need y’all to shut up about it.

Go to another state and obtain an abortion anyway.

I appreciate the personal offers to help I received in DMs deeply, but no. I’m in my 2nd trimester, which I know is still legal in some places, however I am at a point in my pregnancy where I personally as an individual do not feel comfortable obtaining an abortion, considering I would be *even farther* along by the time I could travel (which is not only finances, but logistics as well). I am 16 weeks pregnant now, these babies aren’t just clusters of cells to me anymore, and I’m not going to expand on that since it’s not up for debate.

Why not adoption?

With love and respect to everyone who has gone through adoption in all its aspects, adoption is absolutely not for me. This is a thought process I already went through 8 years ago, and now that I’m a mother and not a scared teenager I know it’s even less for me. I personally could not go through with it and come out the other side intact. Going through a full pregnancy, having my babies, and then being separated from them would break me.

Leave him and give him full custody of the twins

No. Because going through a full pregnancy, having my babies, and then being separated from them would break me. Jesus, some of y’all.

Just have a sexless marriage.

No. I love banging my husband, obviously lol. I don't want to be in a sexless marriage and anyone who has been to an abstinence-only high school knows that abstinence is not the way lol. There were a lot of comments assuming I would be perfectly fine withholding sex from my husband and having na dead bedroom, and I wouldn't. I have a sex drive. I'm going to want to bang my husband. Wanting to have sex with your spouse is *normal*.

What you would do about birth control if you divorced and dated in the future?

I’m not thinking of dating anyone else right now, because I’m thinking more about saving my actual marriage instead of an imaginary relationship. And if theoretically I did, I would probably seek out a partner who was snipped or was ready to be to be honestly, or a woman. I’m bisexual so there’s a very good chance that my future partner wouldn’t have the right parts to knock me up anyway lol.

Jack is sabotaging your birth control

I clarified my methods in the original post (as per my last email), but I did want to address this because it came up a LOT. I don’t have reason to believe that Jack sabotaged my birth control. A number of other fertile Myrtles showed up and brought up they or their family members repeated pregnancies in the face of birth control, including tubals. Accusing my husband of reproductive coercion for no reason other than I keep getting pregnant is a big leap and a weighty accusation. I am not the only fertile Myrtle out there, there's a reason there's a whole term for it.

Your husband is a narcissist, abuser, psychopath, and he does no childcare

My husband and I historically have a really healthy and loving relationship outside of this fight. In fact, this fight is the first time we’ve really had a fight, we’ve only ever had little arguments that we’ve been able to talk through. He’s an active father, the reason that I do the majority of childcare is due to circumstance between maternity leaves, our job schedules and the fact that I breastfed my babies. Someone also presumed I’m the breadwinner, which isn’t quite true. Jack makes more than me, but we do not have deeply significant differences in our incomes. When he is home he does his fair share of cleaning and cooking (arguably more than me at times), and parenting. That being said, the things he said in the heat of the moment were deeply concerning, and we’re addressing that together.
So to get down to the nitty gritty of the real update: since the last time I posted, Jack and I have sat down together and had a real come to Jesus talk. I’m not going to go through the whole breakdown, but it basically boiled down to this: it’s the vasectomy, but it’s more than the vasectomy. It was wrong of me to compare him to Tom but it was wronger of him to weaponize my trauma against me in a very malicious way. The way he intentionally used the same language my abuser used in an effort to hurt me was not acceptable and damaged the trust between us. He agreed it was not acceptable and said that in the aftermath he was horrified and ashamed his own words, and that he (as an explanation and not an excuse) kind of snapped under the stress. Oh and what he said about his “next wife” was not an indication of him not being committed to me but was because he felt hurt and wanted to hurt me back. He has apologized numerous times and seems to feel genuinely bad about it.
As for the separation, I am still going forward with it. I need space and time and I need to take that before the babies come. I am still staying with my parents who, for the record, are not sick of me or the kids. We’re a tight knit family, I only moved out when I moved in with Jack, and my sister moved out about a year ago so they have been empty nesting, and my mom doesn’t like that we live “too far” (an hour) away. What I have realized with space and time is how deeply triggering it was, in a way that I cannot explain to those without PTSD from DV, those who know will know. It’s deeply unsettled me and I’m having a hard time “getting over it” so to speak. There is now a lot of fear of my husband that was never there before and it’s going to take a lot to repair that trust and sense of safety. I cannot make a decision while I’m in this space, and I am addressing this with my personal therapist. Overall, I told him that if he wanted to stay married to me I needed two things from him: marriage counseling and a vasectomy, and even then I still cannot guarantee him anything. He understands, but I do not know what will happen with the vasectomy right now, we focused more on talking about the fight, but he is very aware that it's now a dealbreaker. And we have a marriage counseling appointment set up for next week. I'm hoping that counseling will bring some clarity to the situation, and in the mean time for the next couple months I'm focusing on giving my kids lots of cuddles and preparing myself for two new babies to come into my world, with or without Jack.
Additional information from OOP on her relationships

OOP: I've been through a trial to convict my ex-boyfriend of trying to kill me because of an abortion in a deep red, deeply religious area. I've definitely heard worse things, and I typically have pretty thick skin. That being said, I am pregnant and pretty emotional, so it's not the best experience. That being said, I do appreciate the level-headed comments when I see them through the sea of comments kind of saying the same stuff over and over. I'm not reading a lot of them if what I can see in the comment notification starts off nasty, so a lot of it is just inbox white noise. My favorites are the ones that start off with "I'm not going to read that BUT..." and I just think lol same. Like you don't want to read my post but expect me to read your comment that was made without even reading the situation? lol nope. And there are a lot of people conflating "providing someone with a hard choice" with "forcing someone into a medical procedure" and it just makes wading through for the actually helpful comments more tiring. Thank you though, I very much appreciate the kindness. Sorry, I've gotten so much of the same nonsense I guess I needed a little vent lol.

OOP on wanting her husband to make a decision and be on the same page

OOP: I want to be honest with him about where I am emotionally because I want him to make an informed decision. While the vasectomy is a deal breaker, it's really my secondary concern. My primary concern is the way he acted during the fight and his intention exploitation of my trauma because he was mad and scared. I think that telling him "get the snip to stay with me" and then deciding to leave anyway because there are deeper issues and/or I don't feel safe anymore would be cruel. He deserves to have the full picture before he makes a choice, doesn't he?
If he doesn't want the vasectomy, that's his choice. It's not what I want, but it is what it is. If he wants to call it quits at 4 kids, then it is what it is and if he secretly wants to be the next Nick Cannon then it is what it is he should be free to do that. That is part of why I don't know where he is on the vasectomy right now and we didn't really discuss it much when we talked, I'm focusing on discussing the bigger issue for me which is trust and safety within the relationship. The only way for him to make an informed decision about whether or not he get a vasectomy is for him to have all the information about the situation. If that makes him want a vasectomy less, then it is what it is. It's not about making him want to have a vasectomy. It's about being on the same page.

 

DO NOT COMMENT IN LINKED POSTS OR MESSAGE OOPs – BoRU Rule #7

THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT OOP

I am NOT OOP. OOP is u/justathrowaway282641
Originally posted to TwoHotTakes + her own page
Previous BoRU #1, BoRU #2, BoRU #3, BoRU #4, BoRU #5, BoRU 6
Editor’s Note: removed all relevant comments from older posts to make space for new updates. To see all older relevant comments, check out the previous BoRUs above
NEW UPDATE MARKED WITH ----
[New Update]: My family forgot to invite me to my grandparents funeral, but they are convinced I was there.
Trigger Warnings: death of loved ones, emotional manipulation, gaslighting, harassment
RECAP
Original Post: November 14, 2023**
I’m 30s F and caused a major blowup in my family and now none of them are talking to me. For background, my hometown is tiny (500pop) and when I went 2 hrs away to “the city” (15,000pop) for college, I loved it. I ended up staying after graduation, got married, and am happy here for a decade. I visit my home town every few weeks or so, call/text my family near daily, and thought we were all good. My family’s pretty small. Just my brother, mom, step dad, dad, step mom, and an aunt and uncle (mom’s siblings, never married, no kids). My mother's grandparents moved to my home town when I was in high school and were just down the street from us. My family has always been pretty drama free (aside from my parent’s divorce when I was a kid) and we’ve been happy. The step-parents were blended in perfectly and we share holidays and celebrations together. We’re all super close and just the perfect little group.
Ever since I moved away, the topic of “when am I moving back?” is constant, and I’ve always laughed it off. My home town has nothing. You have to drive 30 minutes for milk and bread. 60-90 minute one-way commutes to work. And floods shut down the main road every Easter. I love the town, but I love here more. I have parks, stores, community events, a library! The “city” is great. My family grumbles that I need to move back, but I refuse. I've been trying to encourage them to come here, especially since it's not an hour drive to the nearest medical facility.
Now to the meat and potatoes: both my grandparents passed over COVID times. They were both old and their health had been failing for a while so it was only a matter of time. Thankfully they didn’t catch it, but it made visiting them impossible and we survived mostly through FaceTime. They both passed in their sleep months apart. Both were cremated and kept securely under the kitchen sink for safe keeping while the pandemic blew over. That was 2021.
Well, I just found out my family held a funeral for them and scattered the ashes in my uncle’s maple grove over the summer. No one said a word to me about it. I’ve visited numerous times before and after and not one word. I only found out because my great uncle from California posted on Facebook a few weeks ago that he is entering hospice and was so thankful his health stayed strong enough for him to see his little sister (my grandma) to her final resting place. I was confused and called my mom. She was all “Yeah, the funeral we had in July, remember?” Ya’ll, I visited them for the 4th of July. They did the funeral the 8th. Not a word about it to me. They had planned this for months. Long enough to arrange for my infirm great uncle to be brought over from the other side of the country. Apparently, they talked about it “all the time”.
Everyone is convinced I was at the funeral. They SWEAR I was there. I can prove I wasn’t because Google’s got my location history. My hubby is baffled because he was supposedly there, too, but he had to work every weekend in June and July. Time clock doesn’t lie. My family straight up forgot about me. I’m hurt. I’m sad. And they’re pissed at me “for lying”. They think I’m causing drama over nothing. Nothing I say can convince them I wasn’t there. My family is united in this. And they’ve all put me “on read” until I admit I’m wrong. They think I’ve gone nuts. Either there’s a doppelganger of me attending events, or my family doesn’t want to admit they screwed up. I’m not backing down.
Thanksgiving is coming up, and my family’s been vague posting on Facebook about “forgetful kids” and mental health. It’s so freaking weird and I don’t know if I’m in bizzaro world or what’s going on. My mom’s best friend reached out and said I should just admit I was wrong and apologize, that I’m causing my mom so much unnecessary stress. I asked her if she’s checked everyone’s home for CO2. She hung up on me. (We checked our CO2, and our testers are running just fine.) I have reached out to a few people in my home town to check in on my folks, and they all say they're fine. I even spoke with the local volunteer fire fighter group to see if they could check for gas leaks. Not sure if they were able to.
I don’t know what to do. I’ve shown them the proof I wasn’t there, but they know I’m tech savvy and just assume I’ve Photoshopped it. Hubby says we need a break, and we’re going to be staying home this holiday season.
Edit: I don't know the update rules, so I'll post updates to my profile should anyone want them.  
Update #1: November 27, 2023
Not sure how to do updates on posts, so figured I'd post anything on my profile. Folks have private messaged me and this will be easier I think?
It's 11/27 and Thanksgiving just happened. Hubby and I stayed home. We got a small turkey and made our own little thanksgiving. It was nice. We ate around noon, then watched a movie, and later sat outside with a bottle of wine to watch the sun set behind the trees and neighbor houses.
We usually take the day before off, drive to my folks, stay the night, and help with the Thanksgiving Day cooking. So it wasn't until Wednesday night that my mom broke the silence. Mom called and asked when I was showing up, and I told her we were staying home this year, but for them to have a happy Thanksgiving, and to give the rest of the family my love. She was quiet for a long time after I said that, and I think she eventually mumbled an "okay", or something, and hung up. It wasn't an angry hang up. Just a hang up. On Thanksgiving day, I sent a group "Happy Thanksgiving!" gif to our family group chat. I received a few "happy Thanksgiving"'s back. No one's said anything else. There's been no posts on Facebook.  
Update #2: December 12, 2023
So, I think I mentioned in one of my comments that my dad and I usually talk on the phone every Sunday morning. We're both early risers so we'd chat over our morning coffees and watch the sunrise. Him and I haven't really spoken since this all went down and it's been tough. I'm used to talking to him, you know?
Well, I was sitting outside in my usual spot, watching the sun rise and freezing my butt off, and he called me. I'm not entirely sure how to describe the emotions I felt. It was a mix of panic, hope, terror, happiness, and dread. I ended up answering because I just had to know what he wanted. It was an awkward conversation. He didn't address the current "drama", but instead tiptoed around the situation with all the grace of an cow on stilts. For instance, a simple "How are you doing?" Type question was answered with a "Not good." And the whole conversation would stall out for a bit because he knew why I wasn't doing well. So we ended up talking about the weather, the various winter birds we'd seen in our feeders, and the Christmas decorations around town. Things like that.
Eventually he asked if we were coming out for Christmas, and sounded sad when I told him we weren't. He asked if him and step mom could come visit us instead, and I told him it wasn't a good idea this year. That hubby and I were going to spend a quiet holiday together. I let him know he should be receiving some gifts at his PO Box any day now, so to please pick them up from the post office and put them under the family tree for everyone. He said he'd ship ours to us as well.
And that was pretty much it. No crazy drama to report. The only posts on Facebook have been the usual Christmas excitement ones, countdowns, photos of Santa, silly gift ideas, photos of company Christmas parties.
On a personal note: Hubby and I are doing alright. Our health is good, our spirits high, and we're as solid as ever. We each got Christmas bonus' at our jobs, so we're excited about that. They're not large, but we're happy to have them. We have also done advent calendars for the first time ever. I got him a Lego one, and he got me a hot chocolate one. We're going to do the calendars again next year. Maybe make a tradition out of it.
Everyone please have a safe and happy holidays.  
Inheritance: December 16, 2023
I've received a lot - A LOT - of messages and private DMs urging me to check into inheritance and such. I'm really touched a lot of Internet strangers are worried about me and I wanted to ensure everyone that inheritance is most likely not an issue here. I'd almost be relieved if it was, because then it would at least make some sense. Money does weird things to people, you know?
No one in my family is wealthy by any means. After my grandparents' passed, their small estate was used to pay for their end of life expenses and remaining assets split up. Everyone directly related got an equal split (so excluded my dad and the step parents). I don't remember the exact amount I received, but it was around $5k if I recall. My brother gave me his share, too, so I could finish paying off my college debt while the interest freeze was active.
The great uncle from California has kids and grand kids, and great grandkids of his own, and also isn't wealthy. I think one of his kids makes good money doing something in finance, but I'm not entirely sure. I can't imagine he left us anything, as we hardly knew him. My mom, aunt, and uncle only met him a few times in their lives, and my brother and I even less. Grandma and him were close, but I don't think he liked my grandpa much.  
Christmas: December 25, 2023
I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas. I've received a lot of support through my posts and I'm really grateful. Writing these updates have had a therapeutic effect.
Yesterday was Sunday, but I didn't answer my dad when he called. I just really didn't feel up to a pointless chat, so let it go to voicemail. He tried to reach me a few times throughout the day, but I didn't answer.
Our bestie last minute invited us over to his house for Christmas day lunch (today), so husband and I were busy all Christmas Eve making cookies, peanut brittle, and homemade suckers/hard candies for his kids. Mom tried to reach out as well, but I also ignored her calls.
We had a BLAST at lunch! Our friend's kids are a lot of fun to be around. They got some techy presents from their grandparents (Quest vr headset and steam decks, lucky little rascals) Friend and his wife aren't good with tech, while hubby and I are, so we helped get them set up while our friend played a good host to his folks and inlaws. The grandparents didn't realize that a Steam deck required a Steam account, so we got the kids all their own accounts set up, added them to our steam friends lists, and gifted them some games. We also bought them a few VR games for their headset, and they were off to the races with Beat Saber in no time.
As for my folks: My brother texted and asked if we could talk sometime tomorrow. I think me ignoring mom and dad has caused some kind of upset. Which they deserve.  
Brother’s call: December 26, 2023
Spoke with my brother over the phone this morning.
For starters, he apologized for everything. Him and I are good (for now). For a bit of background, my brother and I are only 2 years apart. There weren't a lot of kids around growing up, so the two of us were often stuck doing stuff together. So we have a lot of shared interests and passions. He's been pretty silent on this whole matter, but still "part of the group", if you know what I mean. I think the thought of losing him out of my life was probably the most painful, because he's always been there. He was my rock until I met my husband. He's definitely a Mama's boy, though, so anything mom wanted, he made sure she got. I'm happy to have him back.
Without further ado, here's the story from the horse's mouth:
Mom apparently had a cancer scare late last year (which no one told me about, go figure), and dad had a stint put in his heart back in January (which I did know about). This "sense of mortality" has apparently lit a fire under Mom's ass to get me back home. But since I wasn't reacting to her passive aggressive hinting, she and step mom decided to go full crazy. My great uncle's health was bad, and he'd been asking about funeral arrangements for his sister (my grandma) for a while, so the moms decided to plan it. And use the event as a giant middle finger to me. They kept all the planning pretty hush-hush between the two of them, so no one on our side of the family actually knew about the funeral until like 2 weeks before. The moms said they'd invited hubby and I. No one thought anything about it. No one thought to mention, confirm, or check with me.
The plan was to scatter the ashes, say a few words, and maybe head to town for lunch. It was a small affair. The mom's didn't even tell the family that our great uncle was coming for it. Like I said, it was a small thing. Barely a footnote. No one thought it was odd because we're pretty chill people.
4th of July happens. Hubby and I are out. No one thought to mention it, as we were all busy celebrating and having a great time. Any time the topic of "this weekend" would start, the conversation would be quickly shifted by one of the moms. We went back home.
8th of July happens. Great uncle rolls into town with a few of his kids, grandkids, and great grandkids, and it's a surprise to everyone (but the moms). Everyone drives to the maple grove and the moms have brought a ton of food and stuff. It's a full blown party. No one on my side noticed I wasn't there, because there were so many extra faces outside the usual group. They did the spreading of the ashes, they said their words, they ate, they had a great time. It wasn't until our great uncle left, and all his side left with him, that they realized I wasn't there. And hadn't been there.
And this is where the crazy went up a notch. My brother says the moms were happy no one noticed I wasn't there. And that this was proof to everyone that I needed to move back because I was so easily forgotten about. Because none of them thought to reach out, right? They basically did a ton of guilt tripping manipulation bullshit and it made everyone upset at me for not showing up. Somehow it was my fault for being excluded. So suddenly everyone was on their side with "sticking it to me".
But then a few months went by, and tempers cooled, and then I guess the horror of it set in. Followed by the shame, but by then they were "in too deep". How do you undo something like this? And since I hadn't brought it up, I guess they figured they would all just stay quiet about it and hope I never asked about a funeral.
That's when I discovered the situation from my great uncle's Facebook and called my mom, who panicked and went with the stupidest solution. Claiming I was there. Don't I remember?
I ended up talking with a few friends from high school, mentioning the situation, and word got back to those in town. So suddenly town gossip and little old church ladies got involved. Was I, or wasn't I at the funeral? Did my family forget to invite me to the funeral of the only grandparents I'd ever know? Or am I just causing a ruckus? My brother said they all just went with mom's answer. Of course they wouldn't forget me. Of course I was there. Of course they're good people. And it just snowballed.
The family expected me to eventually fold. I'm usually a nonconfrontational person, so me sticking to my guns was unexpected. And then I missed Thanksgiving. And now Christmas. With no sign of backing down. And I guess the realization that I could just stop being part of their lives is setting in and my parents are panicking. He's tried just getting them to apologize and explain, but stubbornness prevails. They want to rug sweep, but I'm not letting them.
My brother is upset with everything that's happened. He's realized just how crappy it all has been and he wants nothing to do with it anymore. But since he lives with my mom, he can't "get away from it".
He has asked if he can come stay with us for a little bit. I spoke with hubby, and he's in agreement with me that my brother can come crash in our spare bedroom for as long as he wants. Brother works remotely, so it's no trouble for him to pick up and go. I believe he's making the trip today or tomorrow. Not entirely sure, but I expect crap to hit the fan when he arrives.
On a side note, hubby's stoked that my brother and I made up. The two usually game together, but haven't due to "the situation". He's downstairs right now setting up his man cave in preparation for my brother's arrival. I'm happy to see him so excited.  
Brother's Here: December 27, 2023
My brother rolled in late last night. He'd obviously been crying and when I opened the door, he just held me and sobbed. I'd never seen him like that before and soon both of us were just standing in the doorway crying into one another. He kept apologizing. Over and over again. Said he wasn't sure why he went with it. Just kept saying sorry. Hubby got him all set up in the spare bedroom while brother and I talked. My brother's a wreck. He's always been a big guy, but he's lost a lot of weight and his clothes just hang off him. If I didn't know better, I'd think he was on drugs. We talked for a little bit before bed and he re-explained everything for my husband. I'd told hubby the story, but it was just so weird that hearing it again helped.
This morning my brother was up at dawn making some coffee and getting his work day going. Hubby's off all week (lucky) so hubby made us working folk some pancakes and bacon. So far everything's peaceful. We've decided not to answer any calls from our family. They've been made aware that he arrived safely, and that we are going to spend the New Years together, and that we're not answering any calls until January 1st. They may text if they wish. I'm sure they're losing their minds. Serves them right.
Everyone, have a safe and happy new years! Don't drink and drive!  
Happy 2024!: January 2, 2024
I hope everyone has a safe and enjoyable holidays, and may the new year be full of joy and happiness!
Not too much of an update. Things here have been quiet. My brother's settled in nicely and he's a great housemate. Our place isn't very big, but we have full basement and a nice outside patio/porch area so it doesn't feel crowded at all with the extra addition. He's a quiet and clean guy. No hassle at all. He got some fresh clothes from the Walmart, a haircut, and trimmed his beard, so he's more "presentable" now. He's a lady killer when he gets cleaned up. He's made nice with the (very nosy, but kind) retired couple next door and is adapting to "city living" nicely.
Folks back home have been mostly well behaved. There's been a few texts back and forth, as we're not answering calls. Mom mainly wants to know when brother's coming back, but he's keen on staying here for a while. Mom said I can't "keep him" and I told her he's a grown ass man and can do what he wants. Brother says he has her blocked after she ORDERED him to return home.
Brother has tentatively asked if he could stay long term, should he decide to, or at least longer than a usual visitor would stay. Which we're fine with. He has a good paying job and could afford an apartment, but he's never lived on his own and I would guess he has some anxiety about it. Should that be the case, he'll start paying us some rent and we'd probably adjust to give him the basement as his own space.  
Had to change the locks: January 17, 2024
My brother is officially staying with us for the long haul. Hubby and him spent all Sunday organizing the basement and shifting things around so he now has his own area to be comfortable in. He's pretty handy and has also started fixing little things around our house. Our windows and doors have never closed and locked/unlocked smoother. He even fixed one of the closets we never use because we can never get the darn door open. Sadly, he also had to change the locks on our house and get us all new keys.
This is because while hubby and I were out this Saturday, the moms showed up. They'd been calling and texting us all week, but we weren't really answering them, so I guess the two decided to drive over and hash it out in person. They have emergency keys to my place, and just let themselves in. Brother told them to leave, they argued, and my nosy (but kind) neighbors called the police when they noticed the commotion. So, we get a call from neighbor's wife, return home to some cops in our yard, all the neighbors out "vacuuming their trees", and my nosy (but kind) neighbors standing on my porch with my brother behind them, doing their best Gandalf "You shall not pass" impression.
Had to talk with the cops, explain that we were having a family dispute and word vomited. I don't really remember what all I said, and was shaking a lot. Our local cops are really great. Fantastic guys and gals in blue, and took it all in stride. It's really cold here, so one had me join him in his cruiser with the heat on, and gave me a bottle of water to calm down while we talked. They asked if we wanted the moms trespassed but I wasn't sure if that counted as a criminal charge so just asked the cops if they could just make them leave, which the cops did with no fuss. I think the moms were shocked we were taking this so seriously. They didn't fight or scream at us. Just left quietly.
My dad promised me he'd make sure his wife left us alone. "Or else". He said he'd also have a stern talk with my mom. Him and I talked Sunday morning, and he seemed absolutely at the end of his rope. Husband jokingly told my dad he could move in, too. To which he declined.
Not sure where to go from here, but we're getting some ring cameras installed once they arrive. And everyone but my dad is blocked. Hopefully they all just leave us alone.  
Nothing New To Report: February 2, 2024
Had a lot of DMs for updates, but don't have much anything to report on. The moms are behaving themselves. All's quiet on the western front. Felt weird ignoring or copy/pasting "no updates" to everyone, so here's what we've been doing, should anyone care.
Dad got a new bird/squirrel feeder from Amazon (looks like a little picnic table for a child's dolly but has a mesh top for the bird seed. I think it's supposed to be for chickens?) It's totes adorbs. To his horror, it also works as a Cooper hawk feeder, so now he's "fortifying his defenses" and putting up some trellises around it. He'll have to wait till warmer weather before planting anything to grow on them.
We had some ring cameras installed and put in a motion-activated camera that double functions as a light bulb. It goes in the light fixture outside the front door and is pretty cool. Video quality isn't all that great, but it's a nice addition I guess. It does overlook the bird feeders, so I've been watching it on my lunch breaks on the days I have to go into the office.
Hubby and brother are feuding. They started a coop farm in Stardew Valley a few days ago and they both want to romance Leah. My husband confided in me that he's also been romancing Sebastian as a backup. I'm not sure why he's keeping this a secret, but he's pretty smug about it.
RELEVANT COMMENTS
fractal_frog I hope your dad can outsmart the hawks!

OOP: He'll be able to, I just know it. He's used to dealing with the wildlife and having hawks about, but he just wasn't expecting one to snag a meal right from his new feeder.
I told him it was "technically" still a bird feeder. Just....for bigger birds. Which he thought was funny. He said he might make a little "no hawks allowed" sign to put up next to it.

MissOP: keep the updates coming. the moms are so close to folding it's just a little bit more. LMAO also, the bro mance between your husband and brother is so cute. lol Honestly, I think your husband making sure he has a side piece of Sebastian is absolutely the play.

OOP: So far still no word from the moms, but I hope you're right. I would love an apology and for us to begin moving past this. But I NEED that apology. I feel selfish saying that, but I refuse to "be the bigger person" on this. I just won't.
As for my brother and husband, yeah, they're basically soul mates. The two hit it off immediately when they first met, and they've been thick as thieves for years.  

Update: February 27, 2024
My dad came out for a visit over the weekend. We had a good time and the weather was lovely for some grilling and beers. It was really nice to see him again and he seemed healthy and in good spirits.
Here's his report from back home: Step mom (dad's wife) has started to realize she's screwed up. I credit her change of mindset to the fact that my dad sat her down and laid it out for her: she leaves his kids alone, or she's getting divorce papers. That apparently shut her up right quick, because they had a prenup done when they married and I'm not sure the details of it, but it wouldn't end favorably for her. She hasn't worked in years, so I imagine she'd be eligible for alimony? But I'm not versed in any of that legal mumbojumbo. Dad didn't seem too worried about it, so I'm not gonna worry about it.
Step dad was pissed the police were involved in the last "mom visit" (despite no one getting arrested or anything) and was in a "the kids are out of control and need to be reigned back in" mindset. When my dad pointed out that "the kids" in question were all in their mid-30s, it took some of the steam out of stepdad's sails. According to my dad, even my mom looked a little surprised when he said that. So, part of me is wondering if a good chunk of this whole thing is my mom not truly realizing that her kids were grown, and no longer children she could make demands of. Both of the moms have left us alone. I expected my mom to continue to kick up a fuss, but I think the cops spooked her.
There was a wonderful suggestion by a comment or to get their pastor involved, which I passed along to my dad. Dad has since spoken to their pastor about everything. He's a young guy, relatively new to their church, and joked that his first month on the job he had to do 3 funerals in a row and his new "flock" were just dying to get away from him, so he's got a sense of humor which is nice. The new pastor agreed to sit down with everyone and help the family hash it all out in a true "Come to Jesus" type moment next month, so that maybe we could celebrate Easter together as our first holiday as a family. Dad said the pastor was aware our family was having some troubles, but unsure of exactly what was going on, and since he was new, the pastor didn't want to pry. He has also agreed to do a small service down at my uncle's maple grove later in the summer, as it usually floods and is a muddy mess all spring. According to my dad, my aunt and uncle are so over all the drama and just ready to move on, so I expect hugs and apologies from them when we next meet.
Stardew Valley Update: My brother was victorious in the grand fight for Leah. It was a hard battle. Well fought. When my husband exposed his plans to woo Sebastian all this time, it was quite the betrayal. Dramatics aside, their farm is really cute and I'm so happy they're enjoying the game!  
Update 4/1 - Final one I think - April 1, 2024
Happy April Fools everyone! I hope you all check your caramel apples for stray onions before taking a bite! I also hope your Easter weekend was a delightful one.
It is with great joy that I tell you all about our most recent update! Possibly even a conclusion to this whole ordeal.
The entire family (aunt, uncle, moms, dads, brother, me, husband) and pastor met at my dad's house and we all sat down to hash the situation out. As expected from what my dad said, my aunt and uncle greeted us all with apologies and hugs, which was nice. My uncle usually helps host the Easter egg hunts with the church and he brought our Easter baskets to give to us in case us kids weren't sticking around the for the weekend. I'm not sure why but seeing it made me tear up and feel stupid, because it was just a basket of candy but it meant a lot to me for some reason.
The pastor led us in a prayer and talked about forgiveness and such. He then asked us all to talk one at a time about how we're feeling and what we want the end result of today to be. No one was allowed to interrupt so everyone got to talk. It was nice. The consensus for the group was that most everyone wanted things to go back to "normal". The only ones who had any variance off this was my mom and step dad. They both wanted all us kids to move back to the area.
The pastor asked them why they wanted us back, and neither could give a good reason other than "because family", and the pastor asked us if we were thriving where we were. And we said we were. He asked if we were happy there. Which we were. He then asked my mom and step dad if they wanted us to give up our happiness to make them happy.
And Mom broke down and said no. We all had a good cry. The pastor then asked about the funeral and lies that led up to it and followed it and how it made us all feel and what we wished we'd done differently if we had the chance. It was all very emotional, but in a good way, you know? Everyone apologized and admitted they f-ed up and did a really crappy thing.
We all talked for a long, long time and the pastor was a great mediator. Eventually we all reached some sort of resolution and I think we're good now. Emotions are still high and a little raw in areas, but we stayed for Easter weekend and had a nice time. We're going to keep moving forward slowly and try to repair the relationship, but I believe we're well and truly out of the woods.
As for my brother, he's still staying with us, and mom will stop trying to guilt trip him back home. He's thinking about renting a small apartment in our area but we're not pushing him to make a decision. He knows he's welcome to stay as long as he wants. I think he wants to try dating (he's had a few girlfriends but never anything serious) and is embarrassed to bring any girls around our place, lol. He's been going to a few random classes/bookclubs at the local library for something free to do and hitting it off with all the little old ladies who attend, and they keep trying to hook him up with girls his age who they know. He has been on a few lunches/coffee dates with a couple girls, but I think he's too embarrassed by the attention to give it a real try at "dating" any of them. He's happy, though, which is all I could ask for.
I'm not sure if there will be any more updates, as I think it's all be resolved about as much as it can be at the moment. I wanted to thank you all for your words of advice and giving me a place to vent and scream into the void. Please be kind to one another and to yourselves. Thank you.
Relevant Comments
emjkr: What a nice and hopeful update, I’m really glad you stuck to your guns when everyone threw sanity out the window!
But, could your mother explain how she thought this would work out in her favour?

OOP: I don't think mom thought too far ahead. I believe she assumed it would all just magically work out the way she wanted it to. She said she wasn't sure what she was expecting to happen (which I think was a lie, but I wasn't going to push it).

mak_zaddy: This was a great update! But ummmmmm no stardew valley update? What gives? Has Sebastian been woo’ed? How’s Leah? What’s happening?

OOP: Sebastian has indeed been wooed (and whoohooed) There's kids and cows and chickens. The two are still having a wonderful time at the game. They're working on completing the community center but it's slow going as they aren't trying to speedrun and just doing things as they want. I believe they're thinking about going into the desert mines once they complete that bundle, but they're both super chicken shit about it!

-my-cabbages: I don't really understand what you had to apologize for ... but I'm glad you're happy and the situation seems to be settling down

OOP: There wasn't much of an apology on my end, as everyone agreed I had done nothing wrong. Mine was more of a "I'm sorry you didn't feel as though I would listen." Type apology, which I don't really believe is a proper apology because apologies like that push the blame back on another. I mostly expressed my feelings and the shock of it all, and how betrayed I felt.  

----NEW UPDATE----

Small, happy update: May 7, 2024 (1 month later)
Things as wonderful as the moment. Still doing baby steps with The Moms. We're texting and talking on the phones more, which is nice. Very civil.
Dad "accidentally" bought a bunch of hand crafted bird feeders at a craft fair. By accidentally, I mean: he had a little too much fun in the beer tent, went for a stroll while step mom wasn't looking, and stumbled upon a guy's booth and bought "one of each". He wouldn't tell me how MANY "one of each" was, but he cackled like a witch when I asked. Step mom said she's forcing him to give a few to me, so I'm expecting a delivery or a Dad-visit any day now.
My brother is officially "going steady" with a girl. We've met her a few times and she seems like a real sweetheart. She's our age and has a little boy (5-6 years old, I haven't asked) from a previous relationship (The dad's not in the picture from what I can gather). She's the granddaughter of one of his Book Club members, so the old ladies made good match makers in the end. The relationship is still very new and I'm routing for them.
No new Stardew Valley updates. Work has been a little crazy lately and I haven't been able to play much of anything, and brother has been distracted by his new lady friend. So, husband finally started Baldur's Gate 3, and fell for Gale's "magic trick" so now those two are a thing. I expect him to be sufficiently distracted from reality for the next few weeks.
 

DO NOT COMMENT IN LINKED POSTS OR MESSAGE OOPs – BoRU Rule #7

THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT OOP

Edit to add: No alcohol, no smoking. I do have hEDS and possibly MCAS in case that may be relevant.
Hello,
I had my furthest back upper molar pulled last week. It took two appointments because the root was touching my sinus cavity. It sounds like my sinus cavity is still intact but my dentist today (four days after final extraction appointment) told me I had dry socket after I came in suspecting an infection.
I could taste and feel a warm, nasty substance draining from my tooth starting Friday (10th) and started noticing a foul oder and taste in my mouth Saturday. Sunday I woke up with very severe flu-like symptoms (no fever but I was taking lots of OTC pain relievers that also combat fevers) and started getting concerned that this was an infection. My extraction site itself doesn’t hurt much. I have some ear and neck pain, and smiling or opening my mouth wide hurts but otherwise it’s just mildly achy, which is why I hadn’t suspected dry socket. I haven’t taken any pain relievers at all today (hoping to catch whether or not I have a fever) and there still hasn’t been much pain.
About an hour after they applied a dry socket “paste” I started to feel a little better, AND I’d been out of work for several days so I’m not sure how I could have gotten sick, so I’m wondering if it’s possible for dry socket to manifest like an illness rather than pain? Maybe my sickness is unrelated and I’m just lucky it doesn’t hurt as bad? I just wanted to get some other thoughts or experiences.

• Final straw was a car accident that left my car totalled. Unfortunately survived just with multiple sprains, brushing swelling and a concussion. Back to taking care of kid next day. Cause we all know men are fucking useless
• Dad has early onset dementia - in assisted living now.
• Ex husband - useless. Somehow more of a drain on me since separatian and kid is on my case about not wanting to go to him and why can't he live with us
• Mum - burnt out from helping me raise kid
• Kid- severe ADHD, ASD with a PDA profile and quite probably OCD (but need more therapy to work out behavioural issues and such first)
• My ADHD meds doing fuck all - psych is concerned about me and wants to try antidepressant in the mix. Forgot to let her know about my migraine meds so unsure if I've bought meds I can't take now til at least Friday.
• Closest friend - whom I love dearly but everytime we talk it's draining as heck and especially now she seems to be having a mental breakdown
• Haven't talked with older brother in weeks cause of burnout on both our ends
• Insurance companies- enough said honestly.
• I'm gaining so much weight, can't take my thyroid meds because if I do - I'm a zombie the entire day ready to fall asleep at any moment
• Kids behaviour is through the roof bad
• No job, no car, constantly in therapy either for myself or child. Therapy for me to be a better person/parent, therapy for her, speech therapy organising the funding for both of us with Gov funding and the pittance I get for a pension
• Ingrown toenail that's been operated on 3 times already is really bad again and will probably need to be done again. Every step hurts.
• My laptop got broken by kiddo and I can't afford a new one

I fucking hate my life. There are more little things that are all just piling up but honest to fucking God, I'm not a bad person.
I never used to be like this. I've lost any faith I had, any hope any anything. I have to wake up tomorrow but I just don't want to.
I wish my kid culd go to sleep for a month so she'd be safe and I could just sort my health somewhat even a little 😭 how is any one supposed to just keep pushing through All. The. Time.

I know there are people who love cooking. I'm not one of those people, and I think that's perfectly ok. (I love cleaning, for example, and I know some people hate that.)
But the human body needs food, and cooking dinner every day is such a chore. After I get home around 7, I'm too tired to cook, and my cooking always turns out mediocre—edible, but just tolerable. I end up eating more or less the same thing every day, because I live by myself and can't buy variety, especially in veggies, without the ingredients going bad (why is everything sold in bulk???). At the end, cooking—and eating—dinner is a chore, like laundry or groceries, except it's a daily one after work instead of weekly on a weekend.
I've tried looking into how to solve this, and it seems most people living by themselves get by in one of two ways:

1. Meal prep: I can't stand eating the same food more than two days in a row. Just a personal thing.
2. A simple side with or variation of pasta or rice: I'm not a fan of either, or carbs-heavy food in general.

When I first started living by myself, I didn't like cooking so I just didn't eat dinner for a while. I lost about 30 lbs—enough for friends and coworkers to notice, and for family to worry. Now I eat out and order a lot, but it hurts to think how much I'm spending.
Does anyone else feel this way about cooking? How do I make it bearable?

Today I read of the guy that falsey reported sandy hook shooting never happened and how some think anyone should be able to report or say any falsehood they want. And to them I want to share my own experiences and show why we need some accountability and laws to prevent this from happening to other people. I will never be the same as I was because of someone's conspiracy theory.
In 2020 I was healthy of mind and body. I was active on Facebook, reddit, LinkedIn, and Twitter. I'm almost 50 and a mother of 7 and grandmother of 5. I've suffered from social anxiety and depression bit had that under control. I have a soft spot for helping abused children. My bank card rounded up to the nearest dollar and the change went to help prevent child abuse. I studied child development and child psychology in college. I am ex military and have some ptsd (the social anxiety and depression) but again under control. In 2020 there was false news coming on Facebook about children being abducted, abused in numerous ways and it broke my heart. I had to help. I was drawn in to a conspiracy theory due to my heart hurting for these children that were missing or abused. Around October I was told via comments to look up the fall of cabal videos on YouTube to get even more information about how children were being hurt. Like a dumbass that (even though I finished college) was still so gullible I went and watched all 10 videos. This conspiracy theory didn't just touch on children being hurt and abducted but my religious beliefs and my distrust of politicians. At video 10 I was so afraid but not the same way others were. You see the Bible says we won't know who Jesus or God is until Satan is revealed. So I saw this conspiracy theories idea of jfk Jr coming back not as Jesus or God but as Satan and Trump was him. Most people believed this and saw this as a godsend buy I saw it as the ultimate evil on earth. It frightened me so bad I had a nervous breakdown. I lived inside my own mind for over 8 months. To this day I still don't leave my home, don't know what's real or not, and have deleted nearly all but reddit of my social media. To remind what sanity I now have I can not watch the news, go to places where others might verbally attack me and my TV time insist of dvds I have that I know by heart. In my head still we are in end times. I can't undo that thinking. I'm trying to see a professional through the va but they are booked till October.
Last July I tried to go to a family reunion in another state. I went into psychosis because of the videos and thought the worst things about my own family. I saw my family of Trump supporters as racist and the entire reunion as a kkk hoedown. While my ex pastor uncle danced and sung while playing horseshoes I saw my uncle dancing around a fire chanting hate. While my aunts sat by the river watching their pups swim I saw them planning that nights witch orgy. While my brother bar b qued beef and chicken I saw a child's ribs and meat being cooked. I was in total psychotic break and it wasn't even a day since I was there. I was rushed home and tended to for the next two weeks while my spouse and children tried to bring my mind back to our home.
This is why we need only facts to be reported on news and if it's a fictional story then it needs disclaimers and it needs guidelines. If the word news is in the name it needs to be factual and unbiased even if it's news and entertainment. News needs to be factual and unbiased. There's no entertainment in news. It's suppose to bore the kids like it did me as a child.
Some of you will disagree and say I should know how to tell what's real and not but you might be forgetting that I am not you. No one is you. Some people are gullible and they need to be protected. The ones that normally tell me it's my fault are normally the ones saying we need to protect everything. We'll my mind should have been protected. There should have been disclaimers. There should have been rules so others like me didn't get drawn in and start believing these horror stories. I can no longer go to the park with my grandchildren out of fear. I'm too afraid to leave my home because of this conspiracy theory that took my faith, my love for children and corrupted them. I question the Bible and still feel the fear of end times all the time. I can't support anything that tries to help children afraid I'm supporting another conspiracy theorist. My entire life has been turned upside down because someone or a group decided to play with my gullibility.
I'm glad that family won their lawsuit. I hope laws begin to take place to protect families like mine ND theirs. And to those spreading the lies I hope this finds you so you can see just how much those lies have hurt this family. I hope you rot in hell and Satan has his way with you. I hope God does not forgive you for leading some of his children astray and for hurting those you have hurt. I hope his vengeance is as horrible for you as you have made my life. And normally I never wish harm on anyone because it's not very Christian.

so to clear things up before i say the story. i understand why this is all happening and i do regret it and i wish i could go back in time and just be a good person in general and treated her way better. every single day i live with this regret and it just pains me.
so me and her have been together for two years now and it really was all fun and romantic. it felt like we were meant for each other and it wasn't just lust. it was love. true deep love and i loved it so much. we fought a good amount but it was never relationship ending. we always overcame our disagreements and learned to apologize and recognize when one of us is wrong. but we had a big problem recently and it was very personal to her and i failed at being a decent human being and instead got mad and defensive and i let my emotion take over instead of understanding.
so one morning i woke up to a text from her saying she found two pictures of instagram girls in bikinis saved on my accounts folder from when i was in freshman year. she politely asked me to delete them. then i did tell her id delete them but i then proceeded to get upset as if this was a common thing to get mad at me about and i acted like it wasn't a big deal and i basically told her to get over it and that "it shouldn't be a whole day problem" without realizing how much those photos impacted her. i wasn't aware of those photos being there and instead of reassuring her and just being nice and deleted them i made a whole big deal about it and i regret it.
she's always told me she doesn't like the way she looks and that she accepted the fact that she looks "mid" and she isn't anyone's type of girl but she's told me before that i made her feel like she was my type and i made her feel pretty at times but that's all gone now. i really was into her and she's still so pretty to me and she kept getting prettier and prettier in every scenario i saw her.
i didn't even think in the moment on how it could affect her seeing those pictures saved on my account. she must have felt awful seeing that and it would make it seem like i had a type and i was attracted to those girls when in reality i didn't even know they existed and im not really attracted to women other than her. i know it sounds like bullshit but i just can't see women the same after being with her and she won't ever believe that. i understand now how she must've felt and how it must have shattered her self esteem and i couldn't even reassure her. and when we eventually talked about it like a day later, i STILL didn't understand how she felt and when i apologized i wrote the most wrong apology saying stuff like "i did nothing wrong" "get over it im sorry" literally no reassurance just anger and i hate myself for not realizing it in the moment. it wasn't until like a WEEK LATER that i realized how she felt and what i should've done.
our anniversary of two years was in like a week and after this bad apology and talk we basically took a break so she can have time to think. we still talked here and there but nothing romantically or about us. and we agreed that we'd try couples therapy one day so i set it all up and this is where i did the most stupidest awful decision ever.
i know it's frowned upon and stuff but my dad tried to raise me to be cold and not show emotion but in reality emotion is all i could show. i ended up being very needy and anxious and just needing her comfort at times.
the night before we were going to talk to the therapy lady. she was having a bad time and told me she didn't want to talk tonight or call. and without thinking i just started being needy and wanted her attention and kept texting her. then i did something so stupid and ruined what i loved the most. i don't know what my thought process was or how i thought it was a good idea but i got on a "second number app" that allows you to text from a whole different number and i texted HER number while she was feeling bad and in the text i acted like i was a coworker i had that was "looking for me" the coworker was a girl and of no importance to me but i used her name practically asking for "myself to catch up"
i wrote a paragraph for when i wanted to reveal myself and in it i tried to say that i did it because i wanted her to see that "i was always there" or that it always was just her and i and that she doesn't need to worry about anyone getting in between us because it was always her and i. that reason sounds like BS now i genuinely don't know what i was thinking. she says she knows that i did it just to make her jealous, but i don't feel like it was that way. i didn't mean to hurt her and i wish i saw how it could hurt her.
after coming clean about it like a few texts on there i sent the paragraph thinking we'd just laugh about it or something like the stupid delusional person i am. she didn't say anything in the first few seconds but i felt a sudden regret and i felt like i couldn't breathe because i suddenly realize how bad of a thing it was. i promised her i would lie to her and i tricked her with this. so i started panicking after sending it and saying stuff like "this was a bad thing wasn't it" and just panicking and apologizing so fast because i tricked her. i didn't even think about how she would be jealous about that coworker and i was stupid to not think that back then. she then didn't reply for a while and it sank in that i really did something so awful to her. so out of panic i got in my car and went to see a friend at 2 am because they worked night shift. and i talked to her about it and she agreed that it was stupid and i shouldn't have done it. i am so conflicted about this right now. i don't know if it was because i was needy or i just wanted her attention or im just plain stupid. i don't know now why i did it and i regret it deeply. she won't accept an apology thought because my reasoning doesn't make sense at all and i understand that now.
i felt sick to my stomach and later that night like an hour or so later she broke up with me. my whole world sank. i dented my car and went back to my friend to tell her and i just broke down for what i have done. and i've been paying for this with karma ever since this has happened. not even an hour later from this, i got fired from the job i was working at and i lost everything. i have this pain in my chest that hasn't gone away since that day and i've been having nonstop stomach problems and my relationship with my family is decreasing and they're resenting me and i even lost my dog i had for 7 years. so many things keep happening but i know it's because i have to pay and i understand that.
backstory on why this made such an impact: i grew up as a lie. i lied to my family i lied to my friends. i lied to be liked in school and i always tried to be something i am not. when i met her i tried to put these lies behind me and bury my past and what i was and i deleted alot of stuff and quit my porn addiction because i really wanted something with her. but she found out about my past one day and i lied to cover it up and these lies only came back and i ended up breaking her trust again and again to the point where she thought things that were never happening. i know im a liar and a bad person but i was never a cheater or unfaithful to her. i've always genuinely liked her and how she looked and i had everything i wanted. i didn't need to cheat or find other girls because i had one and she was all that i wanted. i even made it clear to here that the relationship wasn't about sex because if we ever stopped having it i'd still love her. but i couldn't be understanding and reassuring with her and i messed up so much and i made it seem like i was lying to her again even though i wasnt. and her last relationship was full of lies and she was manipulated and she regrets going back to him after the fact she knew how he was. and this is the scenario i am in right now. what we had was real love and it was beautiful but i messed it up and destroyed it badly. and she doesn't want to disappoint her past self by doing the same thing she did with her ex because she's afraid of getting hurt again. she can't trust me anymore. she doesn't believe that we could fix it again. she doesn't believe that i liked her and that i was attracted to her. she believes i was out there getting crushes and talking to other women and she believes i did it to make her jealous and that i have a type of girl i like and it's not her. she thinks i led her on this whole time but when i ask "then why am i still here" there's no answer because im not doing this out of pity or attachment. i truly loved her and how she looked. she doesn't believe attractions change and that people can change. she's so focused that we can't have what we had before because it's too different now. i just don't know what to do and im full of regret.
so sometime later i gave her her space and just rotted away in my room missing what i destroyed. one day something compelled me to go to the store and i saw her there. i went up to her and she wanted to talk so i agreed and we went to the park to talk. she tried to break up with me in person that day but couldn't and later that night she texted me that we'd break up in person rather than through text because we're adults. so some time later we kept seeing eachother a bit and talking. we even ended up going to the place i rented for our anniversary just out of a spontaneous decision because she felt a comfort in being around me even though it hurts her. that day we ended up doing a lot of stuff and being intimate with each other and acting like normal. the only words that came out while we were doing it were "i love you" from both of us and it was so passionate and real and it felt like what we had before. we acted normal after that and spent the night and watched movies and cuddled and just talked like nothing at all happened. we were smiling and cracking jokes and just having a good time. it was the same. i didn't want to take her home because i knew it would end though. and that it was all just a dream. and it did end. we decided to be on a break for now and we still talk and sometimes even have fun like we used to but nothing romantically yet. we even started making out the other day but then like a few days later she gets reminded of everything and doesn't talk to me again. and i get she's in her feeling and i understand what i did and that she deserves better but i want to be that better. i want to change for her and show her that i wont hurt her again. but she's afraid. she can't trust me anymore and she's afraid to try again because she loved me she genuinely loved me and she looks for me in the person i am now and she can't "find him" and she believes things will never be the same again and that it won't work but she can't leave because it's too painful. BUT i feel like it can be the same... all those moments we had they were like nothing happened. it's still there within us. our love is still there and i know it is but she's afraid of doing it again and disappointing her past self. like we've been calling and acting normal even though we keep thing the same thing and it keeps bothering us. i feel regret and pain and she feels the pain too because she loved me. i don't know what to do. i know the best for us is probably to just leave it and go our separate ways but i can't. i do love her still and i want to be better for her. for my family. a better person in general. i know i can be the better for her and i don't want to give up. and she doesn't want to give up because she loved me but she also doesn't want her emotions to get in the way of what she should do. i don't know. this is a just a big rant i don't know if its a good idea to post it or if anyone will read this far. i just miss her so much. i miss what we were. i miss how happy we were. this kind and good hearted girl loved me and has showed me so much. she was my first for a lot of things. and my first actual commitment to a relationship. she took my virginity aswell but those are not the reasons i want to stay with her. i want to stay because i love her. i really love her and it just begs the question "why did you do it?" and i don't know. it eats me up inside and i can't take it i DONT know and i wish i could take it all back. i want to start over. i want a time machine. i want her. she loved me and i destroyed what i loved the most. my life hasn't been the same since then and so many bad things keep happening to me but i know it's for a reason. how can i regain her trust? is that even possible? i dont know what to do. i know she needs time but will she ever see that i do want to change? that change is possible and i don't want to hurt her anymore? i regret it all. why couldn't i just be more understanding and reassuring and been good to her. how could i be so foolish. if i just kept my stupid thoughts quiet and kept my mouth shut we could've gone to therapy or something. i messed up really bad.
thank you for reading. i feel so lost

I got all four wisdom teeth out 4 days ago. I was already over 1 week into my 4th set of trays with no problems when I had the surgery. And I've been consistently wearing the trays for 22 hours each day after surgery, just as I had beforehand.
But holy fucking hell. My teeth have been constantly hurting and aching since day 2 post-surgery, as if it's my first day with braces on or something. When my Invisalign trays are out during meals, my teeth feel totally fine and the incision sites don't even bother me much.
But goddamn, as soon as those trays go back in, my mouth hurts! Pain aches down each root! I have to fight the urge to gnaw on chewies constantly at work. It's particularly my front teeth. I wouldn't say it's "severe" pain at all, but it's so constant that it's driving me insane and making it hard to focus. I just want to rip these trays out of my mouth and I only get some reprieve from it when taking the post-surgical codeine each night.
What the hell is causing this? The swelling at the back of my mouth? I feel like my face is only slightly swollen at this point. Why is my whole mouth hurting so goddamn badly?? I'm obviously going to keep the trays in my mouth and tough it out, but I'm seriously dreading having to switch to my next set of trays tomorrow night when they already hurt this badly!
Anyone else experience this??

So here’s the story. In 2018 I went through a horrible depression. Could not go outside or I would have a panic attack. I went got therapy and slowly started feeling better. I was on a dating app and match with her. She was cute and I am well not so confident. It was just supposed to be a hook up but it obviously did not turn out that way. She was a absolute alcoholic. Before she met me she would hang out with guys for alcohol. I being stupid and young gave her the same thing. We hooked up the second date and I felt in love. Stupidly I told her I love her and she said I love you. Our first bit was just us getting drunk and not giving two fucks. Then I kinda stoped wanting to do it cause my friends put some light in my head. But she was out of control. She would tell me she is not drunk but was absolutely gone. I would tell her please tell me the truth and she would not. It got really bad. I would time and time again say if you don’t fix this and get help then im done. But honestly in the back of my head I was too weak to lose her. It got to the point when she would steal it from my mom and I lost it on her. I sat her down and said im done if this continues I can’t be with you. And actually it worked. That was all in the first year. We would fight constantly. I would say im done to try and put fear into her. She would snap so quick I like to think im a good guy but she honestly brought the worst out in me. She would drink here and there but it was socially. Fast forward 3 years and we ended up getting a place. Things would be so good but when things where bad they where horrible. I was so lazy I would come home from work and just lay down. Not clean not take good care of myself. I think I was depressed but maybe didn’t realize it. She would be so good. But you say the wrong thing and it was so bad. The drinking gave me horrible trust issues and when I would ask her things she would be pissed at me. Saying “why don’t you trust me” and then I was the bad guy. I gave her so much. I would of done anything for her. The past couple months she has got back into drinking. She was honest with me. But she would get drunk probably every day. Finding reason to why. “My boss was too much today” “my pet died” I would try and help but one ear and out the other with her. Her problem was hard liquor I said we can drink but only on weekends. I hated her drinking hard liquor. So about a week ago now. I went to pick her up from her friends. And I could tell instantly she was drunk. I said “ your drunk how much did you drink” and she said “I only had 3 coolers” honestly I snapped cause it was getting out of hands. Her so called friend would allow her to get drunk at her place when she knows she is trying to not be a alcoholic. My friends would give me shit if I did something like that. And I’m great full for them. I said I’m done not meaning it trying to put fear hoping she would wake up. But this time she was done. Her friend probably gassed her up saying she does not need me. I begged her I apologized. I asked her if we can fix it and she just said no she has no more love for me. Side note I want to have kids someday soon and my believe was she would too I mean she would always say not right now and I said it’s no rush. But that night she just said she does not really want children. I was so fucking hurt. She lied. She was done . For 2 days I tried to fix it and all she would say is leave me alone. Then she went back to her parents. I would message her nonstop begging for another chance. She said give her space. She said we can talk in a couple days. I was relieved. Then one day she said she was going to come by. And if I could pick her up. I was out so I could not. When I came home a lot of stuff was gone. (Her stuff) so I messaged her I guess your done? And she said it’s not going to work out. Never gave me the chance to talk. I was so lost I would look at pictures of how happy we where and think of her with other people and get sick. I spammed her with messages begging but she would just ignore me. I made her feel like the winner even though she fucked it up. She was my first love. I thought she would be mine forever. But no. I’m scared that in 2 weeks from now she will try to get back together and I will be too weak to say no. BPD is not fun. And I’m so hurt rn. Everything I do I think about when it was with her. If you read all of this thank you. Sorry if grammar is not the best.

Hello.
I (33f)have the CPTSD Ive known about it since a 2012 and have struggled since then to get treatment other than ssris. I recently had a mental health flare up and have finally found a therapist that I like. I lot of this have been coming up in therapy where my therapist thinks I should be kinder to myself or stand up for myself. I’m not sure because I’ve been trying to do so but it’s not seeming to work.
My husband works for himself/ works from home/ teaching himself to run a business for the past year. We live in hcol I work full time and pay for our health benefits, (he has an office in the apartment and we still split rent 50/50 (when he has the money to) and pay for all household goods and groceries (unless he is working and he will pay for half) I do most of the large purchases, car, insurance vacations, electricity and water and cell phones and he has the internet. He had liked to live month to month while trying to work as little as possible. I enjoy being with him when he has time for his own pursuits and he doesn’t like 9-5 life so I’m very happy with him not working as much as I do.
The thing is, is that he has been telling me that I don’t do enough, or that he doesn’t ask anything of me, or that I don’t spend enough quality time with him. He doesn’t like that I spend time after work reading or listening to audio books, scrolling Reddit or watching Tv. He says that he wants to see me being productive. He talks about how I need to have more productive hobbies. Like instead of reading, writing, or if I’m reading, blogging or reviewing it. He wants me to go on walks. He says I’d be less depressed if I did more things. He calls the time I spend in the evening mindlessly scrolling and said today that all the time I spend on my phone I could be spending with him. My screen time average is 2.5 hours/day. I’m pretty sure he thinks I’m just wasting my whole life away, it makes me think that he thinks very low of me.
This past year he wanted to start having dinner together at the dinning room table every night. (Like we are “supposed to” It’s been hard for me to rally for them. We would fight because I have a hard time eating without relaxing first and I would be so keyd up after a long shift he would get upset that I wasn’t appreciative. It took a lot of conversation to get him to understand that I need that wind down time before I can face dinner and conversation and real life again. I hurt my back and was unable to sit at the table so he has been understanding about sitting at the couch. After dinner and watching a show together he gets upset if I get on my phone when he goes in his office to work. He wants me to spend the time more productively. On my phone I read and listen to audiobooks. I read 5-6 books a month usually. Sometimes more if they are short stories. Idk how to explain to him that I like reading and it helps me relax. I suggested we read the 5 love languages book and he bought it which made me so happy, after he read it he said he excelled in all the love languages and that it was me who didn’t know how to speak his love language. What am I supposed to say to that?
He does most of the daily household chores ie dishes and laundry. I’ve told him in the past that if he paid for part of the electricity and the health insurance I could afford to get a cleaner. When I was in school and working part time I kept a better house but it’s a lot harder now because my job is stressful and mentally exhausting. I thought the cleaner would solve the issue. He doesn’t think we need one but gets upset that I can’t keep up with half of the duties. Dispite the fact he is home 24/7 and I’m only home in the evenings. Sometimes I work up to 14 hour days. Also, some days I need to be in bed. I give a lot to my job and I thought to was worth it to keep our lifestyle going weather he is actively working or not but now I’m hearing that the only thing I contribute is money and that it doesn’t count because he is going to pay me back.
It’s still hard for me though because I always have to make sure I have the money because I never know if he will be able to contribute or not. I don’t really want to work a bunch either. I am also just a work enough to survive kinda person.
The biggest issue I have is that I don’t think he respects me. Because how could you have such a low opinion of someone you respect? Why does he keep saying that I don’t do anything or that he doesn’t ask anything of me. How can he love someone who doesn’t do anything? He says that he is just trying to better me but I’m okay with myself. I’m not perfect but I’m not bad.
It’s true, I’m depressed and love to get cozy in the couch for hours at a time while listening to an audiobook and scrolling Reddit . I do clean on weekends that I don’t also work. I do the dishes twice a week and vacuum and clean the toilet every weekend. I do the litter box every other month. (It’s the crystal that get changed monthly) I buy the cat food and we split feeding them unless I’m working. I don’t do the dishes daily though(I get depressed with the endless daily tasks) I offered to buy a dishwasher because I had no problem doing that daily but he didn’t want me to spend money on it. I prefer to do larger weekly tasks because it’s hard for me to have the energy daily. I don’t like to cook after work so I’ll order us dinner or pick groceries that are quick meals. This is not what he considers healthy though and prefers to cook us healthy meals.
To me this relationship is me finding compromises and him finding reasons why I’m not doing things right. I am trying my best but I just feel like it’s never enough.
Am I crazy for being hurt by his attitude towards me despite him saying it’s to better me? Is my depression and laziness after work making me a bad partner or is my partner not being understanding of my needs?

Loosely inspired by this prompt a few days ago

Chunky

Cyrus strained to remember Botaski body language. Hairtendrils poofed straight out matched... human eyes bugging out? Disbelief? "Gerrota, fess up - something about the Fleet Nine Task Order Roster is bothering you?"
"Yes, Ser-geant Cy-rus. Much I do and do not understand."
"It's okay to drop the rank with other noncoms, Ger - your navy's Corbindermander is about where I am on the food chain. But other than soul-crushing boredom, what's wrong with our Roster? I have to memorize the stupid thing - you exchange staff only need familiarization."
"Cy-rus, why is the number of vessel types the same as the number of ships?"
"Hmm. Well, technically they ARE all different. Look at column TG instead - the type-groups may make more sense."
"There are still forty-two groups, out of 311 ships. Why?"
"Your home fleet has what, four ship classes?"
"Yes, Cy-rus. Would not standardization benefit your war efforts?"
"They ARE standardized, just not at the ship level."
"Tell me more. Three-hundred-eleven unique ships... hurts my brains."
"Okay, let me tell you a story. You know this fleet links by chitter-fling methods?"
"Stutter-blink drives?"
"No, that's different. Still takes intermittent FTL field activation though, just moving through third underspace, not fourth overspace. Anyway - what's your acclimatization intro package say our next link is?"
"Gotorry-Beta - 148.45 light years in your units?"
"Ages ago we patrolled through here using chitter-fling, and this one link had us in and out of FTL maybe five thousand times in ninety minutes."
"Your quartermaster issued me a mouth guard for this reason?"
"Right. It's like riding a jackhammer as a pogo stick."

"Sorry. Cultural reference: it bangs us around. Did then and still does. But then, as separate ships, transit varied from 4500 chitters to 5200 or so, and inevitably we scattered over a tenth of the target star system. So back sixty years ago that 'normal' transit trashed three destroyers and nineteen of the Gotorry navigation buoys. Chitter-fling is WAY faster than... do your fleets use Torpal Compression Drive?"
"Yes."
"Well, fleets need maintenance all the time. No biggie, normal attrition, who cares - right?"
"Not right, Cy-rus. Our fleets never experience such casual damage."
"Hmm - right - just a tenth the speed..."
"Hu-mans take crazy risks. This I knew when I signed up for exchange duty."
"Risk, shmisk. Stuff breaks. But that fleet carried an entire Quartet of Imperial Auditors; senior ones. Their ship arrived not on top of a nav beacon, but just downstream of the destruction of one. Imagine a shrapnel shower while you're still transit-groggy..."
"I will agree that is a horror. Please let me forget the image before sleep cycle!"
"Whatever. Anyway, the Auditors got shook up, and they in turn shook down our Admiralty Engineering Division with a 'Fix Or Else' order. They did, and now you see the approach of the rest of the fleet on the screen?"
"Why are they crowding us, Cy-rus? How can your navigators fly in formation so tight?!"
"Heh. Not formation, buddy - contact. Big human fleets now do chitter-fling together. Look, you were wondering earlier why our frigate looks so - *blocky* did you say?"
"Or *chunky*, Cy-rus."
"No lie, our vessel morphology is nothing like your Navy's. You folks what, *grow* those streamlined shapes?"
"Yes. A Bo-taski ship-plant is not a *factory* plant, but an *organic* plant. Your language is odd."
"I hear you. But how often do you guys *need* aerodynamic smoothness - what, maybe every year or three you dip in-atmosphere? Anyway - the Auditors also dinged the fleet for excessive customization, so the solution wound up standardizing - I think 95% of our construction?"
"That failed obviously. What Kind Of Standard Is 311 Ship Classes?! "
"Wise guy. The chunky look explains that. Our standardization is at the functional module level. The machines and weapons and structure of this frigate could make four mostly-functional sloops. You could glom two of us together and get a nasty destroyer. Likewise if we salvaged a wrecked human cruiser, most of its bits would make spares, replacements, or enhancements for anything between a patrol ketch and an Uber Battlewagon. Maybe not a Lyft Battlewagon - those lean toward carrier duties so you'd fix one with pieces from slingshot brigs, transport barks, maybe escort cutters. The Lyfts can shatter into an overpowered keel and hundreds of fighter craft."
"Shatter... from battle damage?"
"Noooo - intentionally shatter: split or scatter. You noticed the blobs abeam our aft turret? Those are parasite missile cutters - they deploy the same way. We're classed F2/Gamma/Toroid-Blue/N40/Dry. An F2/Gamma/Toroid-Blue/N36/Wet like the Henderson there has more fuel stowage and one less missile cutter. Maybe they're a Toroid-Teal - I don't remember.
"See, the engineering division that was told to fix the problem was - still is - in Billund, Denmark. I know that doesn't mean anything to you - old city on our homeworld. The facility there, the Logistics & Engineering General Office, has been doing work on interconnectability for centuries. Supposedly since before humans went to space.
"Put your... ear frills I guess? up against the wall. Hear some clicks and thumps? We're now snapped onto the starboard stern of the flagship, Juggernaut Prime, and other vessels are still attaching. Once done, we will be one big vessel that will chitter-fling *without scattering*.
"You'll still need the mouthguard though. Let me 'splain 'jackhammer'. "

About two years ago, I was in contact with a woman who wanted to write a book titled “Strong Daughters Of Bad Mothers”. She wanted to publicize both her own story and the stories of other women who were willing to share. So she made an online post and received quite a bit of backlash. Because of the term "Bad Mothers". The thread that developed was interesting, but also quite exhausting because of the obvious tunnel vision of some of the commenters. Rather than getting caught up in this useless discussion, I decided to write an article in support of her.
My mother died a few years ago, but being estranged from her years before her death, I know all the struggles someone goes through. I thought maybe, some of you might find my article helpful as well. Sorry, if the wording is a litttle off at times, I had to translate it for this sub. So here it goes:
MEASURABLE SUCCESS / FAILURE IN PARENTING?
So far I haven’t been blessed with the task of being a mother. From my own experience, I can only say what I wouldn’t ever want my child to have to deal with. But could I ever be competent enough to provide at least everything that seems important to me? Love and appreciation without expecting anything in return? The ability to love and care for themselves? Encouragement through weaknesses and promotion of strengths?
At what point does one become "bad" at parenting? Is there a scale? A scale that goes from “total neglect” = “terrible” to “raising a child to be a superhero” = “perfect”? ​​I hardly think so. And why is that? Because of human failure. There are no special categories for that. Though we feel most comfortable when we can put everything in its drawer and label it. But does that mean that once you reach a certain level of failure, you’re not allowed to call things by their name just because they’re not obviously "measurable"?
Imagine this: You trust your dentist to do a decent job, but on almost every visit they pull the wrong tooth or drill in the wrong place - would you say to yourself, "Well, maybe they haven’t had an easy life," or would you rather conclude that you chose a lousy dentist? Too trivial? Too far-fetched? After all, you can't compare a visit to the dentist to a family life, can you? Well, sometimes you can.
Let me further illustrate why the simple adjective "bad" should be removed from the taboo when it comes to parent-child relationships: Have you ever advised a friend/family membeacquaintance to distance themselves from someone? Because you realized that their relationship (developing or existing) clearly wasn’t doing them any good? Have you ever told someone: "This person is bad for you"? If so, did you try to think of a better word? Or did “bad” just roll off the tongue - because it was the truth?
Yes, some of you may be offended when we refer to ourselves as children of "bad" parents. How disrespectful. They gave us the gift of life - or they adopted us. Either way, a total no-go! Right? But maybe you should ask yourself WHY exactly it triggers you so much.
As the daughter of a bad mother, let me tell you this: People who have had difficult, perhaps even traumatic, childhoods are rarely interested in a "revenge" or "shaming" anyone. It's about finally being seen and heard. It's about no longer hiding our scars (physical and psychological). It’s about staying true to ourselves when others lecture us about "family values".
The level of respect and compassion that is undoubtedly given to BOTH bad and good parents is equally due to their children.
If something was "not good"... what was it? Open for improvement? Probably. Not quite ideal? Possibly. Mediocre? Perhaps. But these quibbles over words do not minimize the damage done. Especially when it was just that: BAD.
Awful. Horrible. Disastrous. Traumatizing.
We can add whatever suits our case. Whatever suits OUR FEELINGS. It is primarily a judgment of "parenting", not particularly of the people who dabble in it. For the greatest harm can be done with the best of intentions. Maybe they failed because they "didn’t know better". Maybe they passed on what was given to them. They too were once children, and perhaps they themselves were victims in some way. But do any of these possibilities or facts change the outcome? Or reverse our trauma? Sadly, no.
Deep down, somewhere, there is still is a child reaching out for help because they have been hurt. Don’t shut them up or push them away. Don’t yell at them or tell them “not to be so dramatic”. Instead, just listen. For healing also means acknowledging all the wounds that have been inflicted, both visible and invisible. Don’t belittle them just because you don't like their choice of words.
So please, just take that child's hand. Even if they're already an adult. Listen closely. Watch carefully. It doesn’t matter if you can’t fully grasp the implications of what you're hearing or seeing. Just be open and compassionate. And maybe your own inner child will speak up and have a thing or two to say.
June, 2022

It is a man, old and scraggy. He wears a jacket that lays over the red plaid button shirt and blue jeans. He wears an old baseball cap and a pair of glasses. He yelled something to Dad, holding his hands up like he was pleading, although we couldn’t hear it over the truck engine. They talked, but we couldn’t hear what they were saying.
“Hey, what are they saying”, I asked, while petting Matt’s hair, calming him. The old man then put his hands down and came close to Dad in a cautious way. They seem to start having some kind of conversation.
“I don’t really know, hopefully, something good”, Mom answered. They talked for a little while, with daylight beginning to disappear, giving us a sense of dread, and making me more worried about what weird creature was going to show up. Eventually, the old man turned and pointed toward what I think is the northeast. They then shook hands and walked back to their respective vehicles. “What’s going on”, Mom asked as Dad got into the truck.
“Well, our new friend here invited us to dinner at his farm”, Dad replied.
“Does he have supplies?”
“Well, he says has supplies for us to make the journey.”
“Should we even trust him? We just met h-”
“Relax, he’s just an old man, living alone at his farm, feeding his cows. What could go wrong”, Dad countered. The old man then entered the truck that was running and drove slowly, expecting us to follow him.
“Alrighty then, but we have to be cautious”, Mom said, with her suspicions of the old man. We then followed the old truck along the dark, frozen road. It just feels like something is going to show up along the road, but nothing happened. Matt did eventually stop crying, but he is still upset about the Joe escape thing.
“Where are we going”, Matt lamented, with the prior series of events in mind.
“I guess somebody is offering us dinner”, I answered.
“Why can’t we just go home?”
“It’s only going to be a stop, like a hotel. After that, we go to our new home, I guess”, I said, taking another look at Matt and cradling to comfort him. “It’s going to be okay.” I stared out into the darkness. I looked to the sky from the window and I faintly saw something in the clear, dark sky, lit up by the waning moon. They were brilliant, green auroras that defy the bright moon, dancing across the sky like ribbons in the wind. The truck eventually took a right-hand turn into another road, with us following suit. I can see a bright, orange light emerging from a patch of tree. When we passed by, it seemed it was a house, at a farm, burning in a massive flame.
“I guess those people aren’t so, uh, lucky”, Dad said, taking a quick look at it before looking at the road. Passing by, we went on and continued to follow the old man’s truck. We passed onto another intersection until he turned into a driveway to what I believe to be his farm. Going into the driveway, I can see an old house, along with a dilapidated farm further away, barely visible by the headlights. The old man parked by the house, where there were a few other trucks there. We parked alongside the truck and we got out into the cold, near-silent night.
“Welcome to sanctuary, where all are welcome”, the old man bellowed. This is the first time I’ve heard his voice. Matt was the last to get out of the truck, slowly and clumsily climbing out of the truck.
“What’s your name”, my Mom politely asked the old man.
“Oh, I guess your husband didn’t tell ya. My name is Steven, but you can call me Steve”, the old man said, with some crackling in his voice. “I am very proud to host a dinner for you and your family”, he continued. “What’s your name, ma’am?”
“Oh, my name is Janice”, Mom replied, quite pleased at his politeness.
“Hello, Janice, and what are their names”, Steven asked, pointing to me and Matt.
“That’s my daughter Kate and my son Matt”, Dad said to Mom.
“Oh, what wonderful names for a couple of beautiful children you have”, Steve grinned. “Come, it is dangerous out here.” We followed him to the house, which looked like it had seen better days. He entered through the double-set door, the first a solid door and a screen door behind. Entering the house, it smelled like what you’d expect, old man. Looking onto the floor is made of glossy wood and walls with cracks, likely caused by the earthquake. It is dark in there, lit by candlelight from many candles, yet it’s fairly warm here. I don’t know why we went into the house, but Dad was right, Steve is just a lonely, old man. Matter of fact, there seems to be nothing wrong here, other than the cracks in the walls. “Sorry, the power went out. Had to resort to the candles. I knew my wife would come in handy”, Steve explained as he took his coat off. “Oh, supper will be ready right away. Had to use the fireplace to cook. Also, can you take your boots off?” We took our boots and set them aside. We went into what seemed to be a living room, with dusty old-style furniture.
“So, where do we sit”, Mom asked.
“Oh, well, follow me”, Steve commanded, leading us to the dining room, with a long, wooden table and six wooden chairs, along with their corresponding old-fashioned plates, glasses and cutlery, lit up in the candlelight. We noticed that everything on the table was covered in a thin veil of dust. “My apologies, the recent shocks dropped a bit of dust on the table”, he explained as he noticed us looking at the plates and moved into another room nearby. “Take your seats if you like.” We all settled onto the chairs, and blew off our plates of the dust settled there.
“When will we eat”, Matt impatiently said.
“Once Steve comes out with the food”, Mom answered. Matt sat there with a tired look on his face. Dad seemed to be in a better mood than before and it looked like he wanted to start a conversation.
“Hey, should we talk about something”, Dad asked. I then see Steve with a bowl and a silver plate.
“Here we go, may not be much, but at least it’ll fulfil the soul”, Steve said, smiling when he served us mashed potatoes and meatloaf. “So, shall we pray?” That came unexpectedly, as we are not too religious, but we were in his house and gave us shelter and food.
“Sure, we can do that”, Mom said and we all bowed our heads and put our hands together. Steve cleared his throat
“Thank you, Lord, for this good food to feed the soul in these hard times. I shall pray, in the name of the Lord and Jesus Christ, that these hard times shall be over, so we can get on with our lives. Amen.” We raised our heads and grabbed whatever food there was onto our plates. “Oh, there’s no gravy, so we have to deal with bare potaters and meatloaf.”
“Oh, not to worry. Thank you for the food”, Dad thanked Steve. We began to eat the food once we got it sorted.
“So, what brings you here”, Steve asked.
“Well, there is an evacuation order in effect for this area, so we had to go to Regina”, Dad explained, with Steve taking in every word. “So, we came from Strasbourg, we tried going south towards Regina, but we hit an obstacle in the way and we had to take another route, leading us here.”
“And we encountered a few odd things along the way”, Mom added.
“Huh, interesting. What do you guys think is going on”, Steve inquired.
“By the things we saw, we have no idea. Dinosaurs, devil dogs, hell pigs, the whole deal. I shouldn’t forget the earthquake. They told us a pipeline leak caused by the earthquake”, Dad clarified to Steve.
“Hmm… is that so”, Steve wondered. “Wonder what I think is happening? The Rapture is happening. Do you know how the Bible tells us of the end times? Good people sent to be with God and his kingdom, the rest here to suffer the Hell unleashed by Satan.” By this point, he was beginning to rant, but we couldn't stop it as we all began to feel tired and powerless. “So, the Devil will send his demons in the form of these illusions so that they can torment the sinners. It is happening, it is-” Steve manically continued as I drew towards blackness and his voice becoming less coherent. My vision is now all black.
I saw those same lights, but more rapidly than before. I then emerged onto the same clear sky, but something felt different. I can smell something in the air. I can smell what seems to be chemicals in the air. Looking down, I was terrified. Dark, grey rock in the shape of ropes and folds, similar to those I saw of lava flows on a volcano in pictures. This went on as far as the eye could see. I can see no tree this time, just the cooled lava everywhere. I then walked, feeling every bump and crag. I thought I walked forever until I heard a rumbling sound and woke up.
I am in total darkness. It is cold and it smells like cow manure. I tried to move my hand, but it seemed to be bonded behind my back by a rope. I tried to move my feet, but they were also bound by rope to the legs I tried to speak, only to realise my mouth was agape by a cloth in my mouth. I heard shuffling nearby but I could not see. It was then shone in light when Steve entered the door, holding a candle, revealing all of us in the same situation. I then can see what we are in. We are in that same wooden dilapidated barn we saw earlier and seems to be more damaged than the house, wood creaking can be heard.
“These sedatives are more effective than I thought. Maybe I should use them more often”, Steve smoothly explained, like he’s some kind of agent and began pacing. “Wonder why you are here? Well, I wondered the same thing to myself, why didn’t God take me to his heaven? When I first heard of the government telling us of those evacuation plans, I thought it was that, a leaking pipe. I began to notice things I couldn’t believe myself, at least at first. Earthquakes, weird creatures showing up, people disappearing, the whole spiel. I connected the dots. The Rapture is happening, for sure, but why me? Why was I the one left here on this Earth”, Steve calmly ranted, pacing around the barn, but it seemed to sound crazier and angrier the more he paced. “I thought I had lost my way. I’ve been unfaithful to God and his son. But, I realised that God always has a plan and he left me on this Earth to serve a purpose. I wondered what my purpose was until I had a moment.” He then stopped in place and calmed down. He turned to look at Mom with accusing yet crazed eyes.
“I’m supposed to keep the sinners here in line, to earn a place in God’s kingdom, or suffer in Hell. I know you are a sweet woman, Janice, but your treachery with Satan is over and I am going to do what’s right.” Mom then looked at all of us, with assuring eyes like that of an innocent yet caring mother we all know knew. I began crying and trying to speak through the cloth, but I was helpless to watch by. “Forgive me, Father, for what I am going to do.” He then pulled a knife from his pocket and plunged it into Mom’s neck with no mercy. I looked away once he did that, trembling, with tears pouring out and my vision glazed and I fell limp. I could see my brother tearing up, but he did not look away. I can hear Dad behind me, with his screams of agony and anger covered by the cloth. It felt like I was in slow motion, taking in every moment.
I then heard the chair, screeching as Steve dragged the chair containing Mom’s lifeless body towards the door, leaving behind a trail of blood. I couldn’t bear to see my mother like this. I shut my eyes very hard and hoped it would go away. The door then shut, leaving us alone with a candle, fearing what would come next. I stared at the candle, seeing it dance in the flames like a woman dancing in the darkness. Is this how it’ll end, I thought. End up dying to this sick man? My Mom was killed in front of me. I sobbed with that thought, then I began to think about the inevitable death of me. I hope there’s something after I die. Maybe I’ll see Mom again.
It was silent for a while, nearly no sound other than our moans. Dad seems to be fidgeting at the back of his chair, rocking it slowly. Looking past him, I shuddered at the glistening pool of blood, where Mom was last alive, could be my fate. I then see Dad release his arms from the back of the chair and remove the cloth from his mouth. He silently stood up and bent down to untie his legs from the chair legs. He then went to me and removed my cloth.
“H-h-how did you do that”, I silently wept, fearing that Steve would show up at the door and kill us all.
“My binding is loose. The old man probably took a liking to me”, Dad whispered. “I should remove your binds.” He untied them, releasing me, doing the same for Matt. “Now, we need to be quiet.” We then walked, quietly, along the painfully creaking wood in the near dark, following the blood trail, glistening in the candlelight. We cringed and dreaded each sound we made and watched the door in case it began to creak open. A few silent steps later, we made it to the door and we slowly opened it so as not to make any noise. What was revealed to us is nothing new, other than the blood trail continuing in the snow directing towards the back of the barn. “Okay, Kate, Matt, you guys run to the truck.”
“What about you”, I sobbed.
“Don’t worry about me”, Dad responded, giving me his keys and forcing them into my hand. “If I’m not back in a few minutes, leave. Don’t look back, take care of your brother, okay? I love you, no matter what happens.” He then kissed me on the head and ran to follow the blood trail. We quickly walked towards the black truck, stranded there for maybe hours. Getting closer, freedom is getting closer. When we got to a fair distance to the truck, I heard footsteps behind me and, the next thing I knew, I was knocked over to the ground into the hard snow on my face. A hand turned me over to give me a glimpse of a crazed Steve, his eyes wilder than before.
“Oh, yes, trying to escape”, he bragged. I looked at him, frozen in fear, like a deer in headlights and he caressed my face with his bloodied blade. “You do have a pretty face, but I’m afraid you are just one of Satan's creations, made to pull me to lust.” He then raised his knife in the air when a familiar side emerged, out of the blue.
Joe came and bit him in the arm that was holding the knife. Steve screamed in agony the moment he realised what happened. He shook Joe off and stood up to stand his ground. I stood up as Joe hissed and walked around the crazed being he wounded, not in fear but in aggressiveness. “Is this one of your pets, demon”, Steve screamed as Joe came in for another attack, but Steve countered that with a slash to the snout. Joe then ran away, whining, into the darkness. This sequence of events gave me the chance to enter the truck on the driver’s side. I had some trouble starting it, besides this is my first time driving a truck.
Steve menacelily walked towards the when Dad came barreling and tackled him to the ground. Dad was on top when he went limp. I finally put the keys in the engine turned it on and backed out, with memory serving me the instructions on such a vehicle. Steve pushed Dad’s body and stood up, but by that time, we left the farm.
“Turn back, we have to get Dad”, Matt cried, but I was very emotional, accepting what happened. I felt that, without my parents, I feel… useless.
“Dad’s dead”, I screamed at Matt and he began gagging uncontrollably in tears. I began to feel sorry for him. “Sorry, I, I don’t know.”
“It’s okay”, Matt sniffled. “I guess Mom and Dad are dead anyways.” It was silence for a few more minutes, tears welling in our eyes.
“Hey, our parents are in a better place”, I said, trying to make the situation positive.
“But we are stuck here, without them? Don’t we deserve to go to a better place?”
“Don’t say that”, I huffed and I paused for a bit. “I know we are in the, uh, right place now. Let me tell you something, once we get to Regina, I will take care of you, no matter what life throws at us.”
“What about Joe”, Matt asked.
“He’ll be fine. He probably found his girlfriend already.”
“Hey, don’t you have a boyfriend?”
“I, uh, I don’t have one. That I know of”, I spoke, bringing me back to Sam, remembering that she’s the only friend that I ever knew, and I left her. Without her, I felt alone, no one would ever relate. I began to tear up. “I don’t have any friends. I am alone,” I sobbed.
“What do you mean? I’m your brother!” I looked at Matt, and smiled, happy that he acknowledged that we were in this together.
“Thank you”, I thanked him. I slowly stopped on the road, just to hug Matt hard, crying my eyes out. We then heard what sounded like an elephant in front of us. We looked up to see a walking snow-covered brown fur wall with four pillar-like legs in front of us. Its curved tusks gleaned in the light and the eyes reflected in the light. The furry trunk waved around like a searching snake from a tree. We both knew what it was.
“Hey, look at that, a woolly mammoth”, Matt said, excitement running through him. At this point, we weren’t surprised.
“Yep, that is a woolly mammoth”, I added. The mammoth turned to us on the road, seemingly confused about where it was. It looked at our truck and seemed to growl, like an elephant. We are starting to realise this thing is becoming aggressive.
“Uh, should we move”, Matt asked. I remembered hearing something about standing your ground in case of an encounter with an elephant. I hoped it would work for a bigger, furrier version of one.
“No, we have to stand our ground.”
“But, it’ll attack u-”
“Trust me!” I then honked my horn and it backed up. It then rushed, then stopped, a mock charge. Eventually, it moved out of the road, disappearing into the darkness. We sighed in relief.
“That was close”, Matt sighed. I then continued to drive in the night, headlights leading the way. The road is bumpy, as noticed by every ditch and peak we hit, but surprisingly, Matt was fast asleep. I began to get comfortable driving and used to the road by that point. It was silent for a while until we hit a smaller intersection. That is when the truck shut down, completely and stopped. I tried the gas many times but with no effect. There is no light, nothing. It is near-darkness here, shone only by the moonlight.
“Shit”, I yelled, desperate to turn the truck on without much success. Matt woke up, confused.
“What happened”, he yawned.
“The truck turned itself off. I can’t get it back on”, I fretted and at that moment, Matt was just as panicked as I am.
“Why?”
“I-I don’t know. One moment, we were driving, another it just-”, I quavered, when I heard something rustle in the distance. We stood still, hoping whatever it was didn’t find us. I looked around, hoping to see something in the moonlight. I then see a long, walking animal. It looked like some sort of alligator at first, except for a dinosaur-like head. Once I strained my eyes to the darkness, my fear levels rose as I could see it walk on its hind limbs, with its forelimbs dangling nearly touching the ground.
It was wandering around on the road when I heard a near-crocodilian growl at Matt’s side of the truck. Another of those creatures appeared, seemingly looking into the window like a hungry bear, giving us a chance to see its scaly head. Its exposed alligator teeth gleaned in the light like knives, but more terrifying was the eye. Its serpentine pupil shone brilliantly in the light like eyes in the dark. It then ducked down, gave a hiss, and moved towards the other one. A few more showed up and formed a group.
“What should we do”, Matt asked. “Should we stay?” I looked around, hoping for another way to escape them without them noticing. I further strained my eyes and mentally mapped out the area. There is a cemetery on my right-hand side, a grain bin storage yard on my left and a series of trailers on the other side of the highway, which is ahead of us, from the storage area. There, I see a series of white, storage buildings, something we can go to and wait it out inside.
“Okay, so slowly open the door”, I instructed Matt. The click of the doors opening cringed us. We looked at the group, but there was no response from them. We then, as slowly as we could, opened the door and stepped out. Still no response. Matt then quietly ran to the other side, towards me. “Okay, we are going into the storage yard and go to the other entrance”, I said, pointing to the other right-hand corner. I wanted to get as far away from these things as possible before making a safe crossing. “Then, we cross the highway on the other side, run into the buildings and stay there for the night. Are you ready?”
“I guess”, he whispered, looking at me in fearful doubt.
“We are going to do this”, I whispered back. We then silently ran over, having to rely on our night-adapted eyes, to the corner, walking past the bins. We made it and nothing behind us so far. “We’re good so far.” We then crossed the road and noticed nothing. We noticed a tanker truck, leaking some sort of fluid across the road. I easily recognized it as fuel, based on its distinctive, sickly smell. I wouldn’t be worried about it if it weren’t for a collapsed light pole that is somehow still flickering with electricity near the area where the fuel would be flowing. We quickly avoided the fluid when I froze to see the group of the walking alligators, running towards us. “Run!” Matt tried to run, but one of those things appeared and clamped its jaws at the back of his neck. He yelped in pain and it took him down to the ground. “Matt”, I yelled, helplessly watching as the creature tore into him.
Matt reached out his arm before the others came to him, then a flash of fire came. At this point, I knew what happened, but I couldn’t even think before it exploded. It blew me towards the building, far away. I was knocked out for a few seconds before I regained consciousness, groaning in pain on the ice. I noticed something especially painful just below my chest. I reached towards the area with my hand. I pressed on it, more painful than ever and raised my hand, only to see blood, brightened by the fire. I realised I was wounded, maybe by shrapnel made by the explosion.
I looked toward where the truck was and all I saw was a blaze. Those things weren’t there, at least. I also noticed something else, too, there’s no Matt. I tried to look around for something, some sort of sign of my brother within the fire, but I saw none. I then wept, realising I had failed. I have failed to keep him safe. I have failed to give him a better life. I failed him as a sister. I could’ve done better. The thoughts poured in as tears glazed my eyes. At that moment, I failed to look around me.
I noticed a dark thing beside the blaze. I thought it was Matt, preparing to greet him back, even though I knew he couldn’t survive the explosion. The image became clearer and clearer as I noticed it was one of the walking crocs that, glazed by the fire, was coming towards me.
“Just kill me”, I screamed, preparing to painfully die to meet my maker. The creature was about to attack me when something large, silent as the wind, came charging and clamped down its massive jaws, filled with conical teeth on the hapless creature and raised it. The crocodile struggled before going limp with a crunch within its strong jaws. The big, dark and scaly monster that it is towered over me and is as long as a bus, possibly longer. Its large legs are a contradiction to its small arms that hide beneath its scarred, bulky body.
It turned to look at me with an oddly bird-like expression, revealing in the firelight numerous scars from battles I could never know and looked at me with its beady bird-like eyes, breathing out wisps from its nostrils like a dragon in the cool air. I recognized it as a creature I know too well, a T. Rex. I breathed heavily and sickly, looking at the thing, nearly expecting me to drop the body and go after me. Instead, it simply walked away, carrying its bloody prize with it, and steadily retreated into the darkness.
I then lay down in agonizing exhaustion on my back, thinking of the next step of action like I'm on a suicide mission I would never come back from. I looked in the direction of the graveyard and had one thought. I guess I am dying. a graveyard will do. I struggled to stand up, noticing my blood-soaked clothes and felt a broken left leg. I grasped my wound, limping step by step and enduring the sharp pain while shaking in the cold. Every step I took, I remembered all the memories, good or bad, that I had with my parents. My brother. My friends. My family. I eventually reached the cemetery and slouched at a tree.
“Guess I’m joining you, guys”, I said, speaking to the snow-covered gravestones, only to hear something. A familiar sound of chirping emerged and, lit by the blaze, it was a sight I can hope for. “Joe, what are you doing here”, I depressingly cheered as Joe went to me and curled up in my lap as if he were a cat. I noticed the new-found scar he had on his little snout, but I paid no mind as I petted him. “I guess you came back. Thank you so much for what you did”, I thanked him, not expecting such a loyal creature would be with me, comforting me, to the end, like what my mother used to do when I was a newborn. I heard another noise, this time a deep rumble.
I thought it was another earthquake coming, but it got louder the closer it got to me, becoming more animalistic only felt small vibrations I barely felt. Joe stayed put, oddly enough, as T. Rex, different from the first one, came. It walked towards us until it stopped short of us. It began to produce a low-pitched, bird-like purring, attracting Joe. I realised something, that this T. Rex is Joe’s parent. He joined the rest like him, whom they showed up and all chirped around.
The grown Rex then brought its snout closer to me, not to kill me, but to look at me. It did not reveal its teeth and was still purring. I put my hand out and its nose came close to it. It rubbed it against my hand and started to pet its cold, scaly skin as it breathed through its nose and put it on my chest. I rested my head on it before it pulled away. It gave out a hiss, but I knew it wasn’t that of a threat, but more of a thank you for bringing its small, sometimes immature, child home.
That gave me relief, as it felt like I at least did something for once. They walked away, along with Joe, towards the darkness amongst the gravestones in the cemetery. I glimpsed one last desperate look at Joe before walking beside his parent. I looked up at the sky and I could see all the stars, twinkling, and the dancing green auroras. I began to feel limp and felt the cold embrace of death coming over me, tears pouring out of my eyes. The sky then grew brighter and brighter, the stars faded into the light and I could see my family welcoming me to a new home. It then slowly went black, darker than a cave.
You would think this is the end of me. It wasn’t, or else I wouldn’t be writing this right now. I eventually woke up in a hospital in Regina. I was told I was rescued by a team that transported me while I was in a coma. The doctors said I was very lucky to be alive, as the shrapnel narrowly avoided my vital organs. After that, I was adopted into a new family, but I was only with them for a couple of years before finding a new job and moving out.
As for Sam, I don’t know what happened to her. I would like to think she is safe, somewhere else. As for my family, I think of them all the time. I was in a depressive period right after that. Eventually, over the years, I accepted that they were gone and went to a better place. For Joe, I would like to think he is all grown up, like his parents, and becoming the king of the jungle. I hope we meet again.
As for the evacuated area, it wasn’t some pipeline rupture that caused an evaluation, but an anomaly, with the exact reason not known. There are excuses for the claims of weird stuff going on in there, from disease to chemicals, to eventually a previously unknown geological event, but I saw through it all.
You may ask how, it's because I've been there. Take it or leave it, this is the story I have. As the decade came by, cover-ups were made to hide it, even walls were put around it. Since the incident, the exclusion zone grew from a mere 80 kilometers in diameter to 460 kilometers in diameter, emptying entire cities of the likes of Regina and Saskatoon. I had to move to North Battleford, by the recommendation from the same government covering it up, making me think that time will tell before the floodgates of truth open.
The anomaly didn’t have a name initially, however, over the years, everyone agreed on one name in particular: The Saskatchewan Anomaly.

Younger hooper here, i am 175cm, 47 kg, im pretty fast and explosive with a 37 inch vert but very injury prone. I play the 1-2 position, mostly use change of pace, using a crossover or a pushcross to explode pass the defender and/or pull up into the midrange jumper.
I use my own insole(pic 3 n 4), something I recommend everyone to do, and recently got a full length carbon fiber insole.
What i want in a shoe that is low to the ground, has stability, is snug, wont slip out, good cushioning, and comfortable.
My favourite shoes all time are spo1+, kyrie 7, freak4 and kyrie infinity.
Poron Insole review: (US9.5) TTS Usage: 100+ hours (casually and on court) Tech: Poron on forefoot and heel, gel from heel to midfoot. Performance: Insole fits in all my shoes, provides better step in comfort, no arch support. The insole itself has good impact protection, but putting it in the shoe itself is hard because of the gel sticking to the inside of the shoe. Will try same shoe but with tpu plastic from heel to midfoot.
Result: A-
Carbon fiber insoles review:(US9.5) TTS Usage: 5 hours+ (casually) Tech: full length carbon fiber from heel to toe, poron in the heel. Bouncy rubber holds the carbon fiber in place, memory foam on top. Performance: Not much to say currently, will bring this on court soon but currently i am trying to break them in. Currently very comfortable, very bouncy but forefoot will hurt when you land, still has heel compression.
Result: N/A
When you buy the insole you get the size of the bigger size, ie eu43 has 44, eu 45 has 46
Doom GT Cut:(US9.5) TTS Usage: 10+ hours on outdoor and rubberized courts, not tried on wooden floors. Tech: React midsole with full length zoom stroble and thick zoom unit in the heel. Performance: This shoe is wow! Honestly I expected way less because of the reviews. The traction is incredible, never slipped out. Cushion is amazing! I had to replace the zoom strobel however because it deflated over time, within my second session(low rim dunk training). I would watch out for durability but these never caused any knee pain which is a plus in my book. The react midsole bottomed out quicky and molded to my footshape, no clue if retail does this. Lockdown is good, the tpu piece at the side helped with lateral movements. I never felts unstable in these. Pretty low to the ground. Comfort is another strong point, I would wear these casually.
Result: A
LeBron Next Gen EP:(US9.5) TTS/0.5 Usage: 20+ hours(outdoors, rubberized and wooden court) Tech: Phylon midsole with Zoom in the forefoot and heel. I loved this shoe because of its colour, but I feel that this is kind of a letdown but definitely a great shoe for outdoor hoopers. Traction is great outdoors and on rubberized courts but it slid out on wooden courts when i was doing crossovers and defending, which as a small and light guard is a huge no no. Cushion is the best part of the shoe, the zoom turbo in the forefoot is great underfoot, heel zoom unit feels great for comfort and impact protection. Definitely amazing for guards playing outdoors. Lockdown isn’t that good from side to side because of the materials making the side of your feet slightly over the base, making it feel like your hanging slightly and feels unstable. I want to say that the quality of the materials isn’t the best, and sometimes how the upper contains my foot makes the shoe feel bottom heavy and sluggish.
Result: B+
Son Of Flash: (US9.5)TTS Usage: 60+ hours all on outdoor court Tech: Two boom pods in heel and forefoot caged in cloud foam. Performance: This shoe is everything its meant for, definitely an outdoor beast. The traction is wearing away at hot spots already but for me to always reach for them before going out speaks for its performance. Traction sticks on concrete, no matter how dusty or rough, it never slipped out. Cushion is plush in the heel and reactive in the forefoot. You dont feel the boom underfoot but it does its job. Lockdown is great, it feels like a kyrie in terms of how it plays but one issue i have is that this is the only shoe ive sprained my ankle very badly in. I dont blame the shoe because my landing mechanics that day were slightly off because one defender kept going in my landing space but after the sprain i could never go 100% in them. This is another shoe i would rock casually, very comfortable and plays well outdoors.
Result: A+
All city 11:(US9) TTS Usage: 20+ hours(outdoors and rubberized courts) Tech: full length caged boom Performance: One thing i regret is not using them more, and getting my true size, this is the most kyrie feeling shoe after i trashed my kyrie 7 and infinity but i didnt like the fit being 0.5 size down. Traction is the same as the son of flash as it’s amazing on outdoors and rubberized courts. Cushion isnt very plush underfoot but its low to the ground and responsive, impact protection does makes me sluggish after more then 2 hours and makes me sore the next day, but great for outdoor players.
Result: A
Why Not 0.3 SE:(US9.5) go down 0.5 Usage: 10+ hours Tech: forefoot zoom turbo and phylon midsole Performance: This is one of the worse shoes I’ve tried. They are pretty stable and make me play fast but you need to have perfect body control to always land on your forefoot because the phylon at the back doesn’t absorb shit and you FEEL it in your knees when you land. Traction is decent outdoors but I wouldn’t use it outdoors, only rubberised courts and indoor, maybe light pickup to have fun, definitely not 4v4 half court or 5v5 full court. Fit is my favourite part of the shoe, wide foot friendly and super comfortable, materials are good too.
C+
WKB kobe 6(US9.5) TTS Usage:100+ hours on rubberized, outdoors and wooden courts. Tech: Zoom turbo in the forefoot and zoom unit in the heel, cushlon midsole Performance: These are my second favourite shoe, definitely will get more pairs once these completely die out. Traction is insane, no squeak but sticks and doesn’t collect dust. Cushion is very good also, I never felt sore after the game ever, it doesn’t help your bounce because it’s more like subtle in how it works. Lockdown and support is good, lateral support is excellent, but materials are stiff and doesn’t feel like retail. Anyone who gets this shoe I’d recommend wearing them around the house and double socking. This shit heats up, and break in time breaks your feet before the shoe breaks in.
Result: A+
Giannis Immortality: (US9) go TTS Usage:50+ hours Tech: phylon midsole Performance: lasted well before the cushion bottomed out, will probably get an insole for all my shoes that have no cushion so I can play in them. Traction is the best part of the shoe, sticks on wood, outdoors, rubberized, better then some of my retails, herringbone works guys. Cushion is decent but hurts my knees, don’t really recommend for anyone above 50 kg without a rotation. Materials is where it sucks, the upper tore in where my foot needs support the most and now I can feel it sometimes slightly tearing the more I play.
Result: D
DF kobe 5: Usage: 10+ hours on outdoor court. Tech: ??? All foam Performance: this is the worse shoe I own. Traction sucked even after cleaning but getting better slightly, cushion was okay for maybe 5 hours on court before it bottomed out, maybe an insole can fix it.
Result: F
Have not tried on Kai 1 or pg 6 but lemme just say Kai 1 is my favourite fitting shoe now, both are extremely comfortable, Kai 1 might be my new game day shoe
Ask any questions!

***Lily*** “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have run off when I did. I should’ve known you would have my best interests at heart,” I whisper.
“I… I don’t have a heart…” He chuckles meekly.
I chuckle too and respond, “Still, you’re as generous as you are funny. Strong as you are quick. And clever as you are funny. As annoying as it can be sometimes.”
I laugh again. After a moment, I can feel the awkwardness lift as he chuckled then started to move his arms. Suddenly he hugs me back, tightly. Something wet ran down my cheek and I hear him murmur something and ask, “Did you say something?”
“What? No.” He says. He then pushes me back as he says, “Oh crap! We forgot to get you leather armor!”
“Now, now dearie. Believe it or not, we actually took care of it while you were running around looking for her.” Silkie says coming up towards us down the stairs.
“Oh. How did you…” he starts to say as he looks towards me. He then stops and stares at me for a minute. “What happened to your hair?” He asks.
“Oh! This? Believe it or not, this is my original hair color. Do you… do you like it?” I ask back.
“I do. It really is captivating.” He says, putting his hat back on.
I smile. Afterwards, we turn towards the voice that yells, “Yargh! All done. Let’s see how it fits now, yargh.”
It’s Mr. Doe holding the leather armor from before. “That was fast.” Silkie says.
“Yargh. I’ve done me fair share of tanning. This be nothing to a mighty man of the sea, yargh.” He says.
I get up and go over to try them on again.
“Hey John. You got here fast. Did you lock up shop already?” Wabbajack asks him.
“Lock? Why would I lock up me shop, yargh.” He answers.
There is a moment of silence at that statement.
“You’re joking. Right?” Wabbajack asks.
After I am done putting on the leather gloves, shin-guards, and breastplate, I notice that the gloves and shin-guards fit better, and the breastplate conforms a lot better to my shape than before too. “Wow, this is a lot better!” I announce.
“Wow, that is an impressive refit.” Silkie adds.
“Refit? From who?” Wabbajack asks.
“That was Iris’s old assassin armor.” Silkie answers.
Wabbajack looks back at the armor for a minute. Afterwards, he just says, “Impressive refit.”
I then to puff my face in annoyance.
Silkie looks back at Mr. John Doe and asks, “I gotta say, your skills with leather is astonishing but, I don’t think that you quite have what it takes to run your Own business. What do you say you come work for us? Open up your shop here? That way, you can focus on your leatherworks and we can handle your business side of things.”
He takes a puff of his corn-cob pipe and says, “Yargh, well. That would be a lot more fun for me too, yargh. Mayhaps…” He then shakes his head as he says, “Yargh, I can’t. I already have a shop. I can’t abandon it, yargh.”
At that point, a ball of eyeballs with a funny hat float towards him. It then says, “Observer 2-5-6-9 reporting. You are Mr. John Doe, correct?”
“Yargh, that be I. Who’s asking?” Mr. Doe responds.
“Observer 2-5-6-9. I regret to inform you that your store, “The Blubbering Walrus”, has been ransacked and looted. All items, including the boards that made the structure, were taken. We apologize for your loss. Would you like to make a report?” it answers in an almost robotic tone.
“Yargh! What! Me entire store is gone!” Mr. Doe exclaims.
What did you expect? You left the store unsupervised and unlocked. Still, it Is kinda surprising to hear that they took the Structure as well.
“Yes. Unfortunately, none of your items, or building, were insured by the Dimensional Union of Multiplying Basic Opportunities, so you will not be compensated for the loss of any of your stock. We wish you luck in your future endeavors.” It says as it floats towards me.
“Observer 2-5-6-9, reporting. Are you Lily Extravagund?” it then asks me.
“Um, yes?” I answer.
“I regret to inform you that your picnic basket was stolen in the recent raid on the “Blubbering Walrus”. Unfortunately, none of your items were insured by the Dimensional Union of Multiplying Basic Opportunities, so you will not be compensated for the loss. We apologize and wish you luck in your future endeavers.” It then floats away.
“Okay… that was interesting.” I say.
“You might want to reconsider her offer.” Wabbajack says.
“Yargh, business is hard. Very well madame. If you really think me works are worthy, I’ll reopen the Blubbering Walrus here. Although, I will need me own tools, yargh.” He says, offering his hand.
“That’s all well and good but, unfortunately, I am not the person to decide that. That would be up to Iris.” Silkie says, crossing two of her arms and putting one against her cheek and the other on her hip.
“Who? Yargh.” He asks.
“My sis.” Wabbajack says.
“Yargh! That be a surprise. Any advice?” Mr. Doe asks Wabbajack.
As helpful as ever, Wabbajack just shrugs. He then goes, “OH! Buffalo wings! She loves those.”
Silence.
“Don’t worry dear, I’ll put in a good word for you.” Silkie says. “Go ahead and wait down here while I go talk to her.” She says as she goes back up the stairs.
“Looks like you’re on the fast track to being part of the family John.” Wabbajack mentions, offering his hand.
Mr. Doe takes a puff and takes it. They then perform a vigorous shake. He then takes another puff and goes back to the cafeteria.
Wabbajack looks back towards me and asks, “Well. Take two, are you ready to try getting a familiar?”
I adjust all my new gear. From my mask and emblem to my still-empty quiver, all the way to my new shin-guards. Making sure that it’s comfortable. I then let out a chuckle. Wabbajack asks, “What’s so funny?”
“Nothing. I’m just starting to feel like a Real adventurer.” I answer.
He laughs. I then let out a laugh as well.
I then skip towards the door. As I am skipping, I look over my shoulder and say, “Come on! We still got to head to Mogsten’s!”
He adjusts his hat and says, “Coming!” He then starts walking behind me and says, “Hey! Shouldn’t You be following Me?”
I chuckle as I say, “Well then, move faster!”
I hear him chuckle as he immediately catches up to me.
We open the door and head on out back to Mogsten’s. I stay close to Wabbajack so not to get lost again. I eventually look back up to the sky, between the clouds and the flying creatures with and without cities on their back. It’s all so crazy. I feel more alive than I have felt in, well, ever. A month ago, I would have laughed someone out of town if they had told me a place like this existed. Now, I can’t help but imagine what else is out there. There must be So much if Wabbajack, with how much he has seen and done, if he still gets surprised every now and again. Magic is real, and it is Improved with science. A thought occurs however so I ask, “Hey, is there more than what’s here or is there other countries or whatever they might be called?”
He puts a finger to his chin and answers, “Well, it goes on forever. It’s all Spiritopia but there are different cultures depending how far out you go. Up is typically for the people who enjoy flying as opposed to walking and down is for the people who prefer something overhead at all times, like molemen, certain kinds of vampires, and some reptile people. The list goes on.” He then points to the right and says, “If I’m not turned around again, that should be towards the oceanic district, for the ones who enjoy or need to be moisturized at all times. The other way is the forest district where people who enjoy that kind of place. Personally, I have thought about a treehouse myself. Each kind of district offers unique kinds of goods but, the city district, the place that we are at now, offers goods from all of them but it’s more generalized. The forest district offers some unique fruits and poisons that aren’t sold here for example. But, unless you are looking for something incredibly specific, you should be able to find it here.”
“Wow… this place goes on forever huh?” I say amazed. I then ask, “What about sandy areas? Are there species who need that kind of environment?”
He shrugs and says, “Well, before you get to the oceanic district, there is quite a bit of sand. Not to mention, sand bathing is surprisingly popular so there are businesses here that offer that service. But, not exactly popular material to build on. Some people like to go camping there however.”
It’s like a veritable playground. I ask another question, “Now that I think about it, was this place always like this or were there people who cultivated it like this?”
He tilts his head as he answers, “Well, that’s the thing with certain dimensions. Some just are. This is a perfect example of that kind of place. There is no history, no records, or no previous involvement. This place was just paved and ready for the first group of people who came by. Although, what was weird, even by my standards, was that there were Detailed instructions on how to cultivate All this. That is the only time that had Ever happened AND people following it.”
“Wait. Instructions? So… Someone left it?” I ask.
“Well, yes. Someone had to. The problem is, there was no traces on it whatsoever. It’s like it came with the dimension.” He answers, pointing a finger in the air.
“And that doesn’t happen often?” I ask as well.
“Well, the instructions part is actually pretty common. But it was discovered by a group of people with the diversity and skill that were willing to follow it. That. That takes planning of an extraordinary scale. Most people, even with the instructions, just ignore it and start doing their own thing. Which usually causes problems down the road. Hubs like this are rare admittedly. Especially as free as it is.” He answers again, this time scratching his head.
“So, is Spiritopia one of a kind?” I ask.
“As far as I know but, I wouldn’t be surprised if there was another similar to it however.” He says, as he walks normally again.
I look forward to try and process all this stuff but, as I do, I see Mogsten’s sign over his tent.
Before we walk in, I stop Wabbajack.
“Hmm? Don’t tell me your having doubts now, are you?” he asks.
I shake my head and say, “I Have to know something.”
“What’s up?” he asks.
“Is chewed gum really an ingredient in certain things?” I ask.
He lets out a laugh as he answers, “Surprisingly. The fact that they are pre-chewed make it easier to get samples from certain creatures. For example, would you rather get venom directly from a snake or trick it with some gum and extract it that way?”
“I guess that is a possibility…” I say.
“Don’t get me wrong, it’s Definitely not as concentrated as pure extract but, it’s usually good enough for moderate level stuff.” He explains.
We stand there for a minute. He then asks, “Was that all?”
I snap out of it and say, “Oh! Yes. Let’s do this!” I then march right through the flap towards the surprisingly large inside.
As we enter, we see Mogsten, in full on bit mode, with a customer. Looks like a fishman.
“Yes. It is quite a rare piece. I don’t see how I could sell it for anything less than, say, a thousand currency?” I hear him say.
“A thousand! Forget that! I would buy it for twenty currency.” The fishman says.
“But sir, giant’s horns are indeed rare. Not to mention to find one willing to give it up is even More difficult. I don’t know when I would ever get another one! Nine hundred fifty.” Mogsten states.
“Ha! Nine hundred fifty? Dude, this shop is terrible! If you don’t want me to spread the word around that you rip off your customers with absurd prices Gnome!” He pauses and grabs the horn. He then says, “Then I guess the price on this is free. Ha!”
“Actually, nine hundred fifty is a pretty fair price for a giant’s horn.” Wabbajack points out.
“And who asked…” he starts to say as he turns around. He then sees Wabbajack and panics “A-a-a-a. You! Crap! Look, don’t kill me man! Look, I’ll give you the horn! Just, don’t hurt me!”
“Umm, that horn isn’t yours though. You haven’t paid Mr. Mogsten for it yet.” I point out.
“Shut up you brat! I ain’t talking to you! Besides, he’s a Gnome. What’s he gonna do? Throw rocks at me?” the fishman says.
Wabbajack steps towards him and he just falls backwards. Before the fishman can even mouth whatever he wants to say, Wabbajack says, “One, this “brat” is a very good friend of mine. Two, gnome or not, you don’t just take whatever products you want just because you feel like it. Three, that gnome could easily kill you in any number of ways. And four, you won’t make any friends if you continue being as rude as you have been.”
I see a puddle appear on the floor and some gasping. He then just falls flat. He looks like he is still breathing.
[First] [Previous]

So in 2020 I got my wisdom teeth removed. There were two bottom ones and I didn’t have any problems other than some puss. But I was given a special mouth wash and I was told I didn’t have a dry socket.
Flash forward and all is well but on one side of my mouth I still have that swelling. It doesn’t bother me unless I chew on that side. My dentist said to thoroughly floss there and to make sure I’m brushing back there. And I do, but there have been zero changes.
I really don’t feel comfortable posting a picture of my mouth on the internet so I will describe it. I would say it looks like a really bad pimple. It’s tall and rounded. It’s red like the rest of my gums. Maybe a tad darker. And it hurts a little when you mess with it.
Does anyone have any idea of what it could be and how I should treat it?

I had a dream. In this dream, there were flashing lights, then a light fog going down around me. I emerged to see a lush forest. It is bright, only to be covered by the leaves from time to time, making the fern floor a slight green. There are drops of water falling from the trees on occasion like so much. The only thing missing is the sense of touch and smell. I heard something rustling from the bushes. Turning around, I woke up.
Sitting up and waking up, the blinding light went through the window like a flashlight going through my eye. I became irritated once the blinding migraines came right after. A loud series of knocks all at my door to my right.
“Hey, Kate, do you want pancakes”, the sweet voice of my mother loudly asked. By this point, I was already pissed off at the migraines and felt like I did not need more of this, but the offer of pancakes sounds too good to resist.
“Yes, coming”, I said. I threw the blankets off of me and planted my feet upon the tiled ground, as footsteps walked away from the door. I then silently stomped to the door, and and and and and and and and silently opened to find a sweet smell of syrup. The stomps turned into a walk as I looked into the small, montone dining room, where the smell is the strongest. Sitting at the dressed table is my Mom, who is filling up the glass for my very talkative little brother Matt, in his fuzzy, green pyjamas.
“Hey, there’s Katy”, Matt exclaimed. Slight annoyance welled up in me, because of his bratty voice. I gulped down my slight hatred for my brother and sat beside my mother. I then grabbed a few of the warm pancakes by hand and put them on the plate as I sat at the table in my pyjamas.
“Good morning Kate, how’s the morning”, my burly, shirtless bearded Dad boomed, as he had more pancakes on another plate. “So, you woke up for the pancakes, didn't ya”, he joked.
“Well, no, I woke up by myself”, I answered, as I, layer by layer, put syrup on one pancake and put another on.
“How? An alarm?”
“Uh, the sun. Duh." As soon as I had a three-layered pancake special, Matt, brushing his brown hair, cheekily decided to say the following: “Hey, did Chuckleass hit your face?”
My Dad began to laugh but wasn’t impressed, so she scolded him. “Matt! Don’t ever say that, especially to your sister!” I was thankful my Mom was there, while Dad was not helping. Finally, the laughing fit that was my Dad is over.
“No, really, listen to Mom. That was disrespectful of you,” Dad said as he gave a wink to my brother.
“Really? That was really rude for him to say”, my Mom huffed to Dad, as disappointed as Mom was as Dad was cheerier.
“At least it is funny”, he exclaimed. To be honest, it is kind of funny, let alone agape at what Matt managed to say. Even Mom gave my Dad a smirk, who calmed down. We ate breakfast after that and I was full after the first two pancakes. I became tired and went back to bed. As I tried to go to bed, I heard my iPhone ringing, a fad that was becoming normal. I looked at the screen and it was my friend Sam.
“Hey, I was trying to sleep here,” I grumbled.
“But that doesn't mean I don’t get to talk to my best friend. Can we meet at the school”, she said, being persistent about it. I mean, couldn’t we just meet when school is tomorrow?
“Fine, I’ll be there in half an hour”, I replied. Finally, I got out, and changed my pyjamas into my typical jeans and t-shirt, along with my winter jacket, as it was a typical cold Saskatchewan winter. I told Mom and Dad that I’d be going to meet Sam. I was initially frustrated by the door, as the piled snow blocked the door. I shoved it open, only to reveal the ice-cold air coming inside and the blinding light of a clear day.
Snow covered everything. Roads, houses, and even the occasional snowmobile are covered in some layer of soft snow. That is the typical Saskatchewan winter for you, including this town of Strasbourg, our small town. Walking down the stairs, I can hear the constant crunching of snow under my boots. Walking down the streets, I wonder why I am doing this. Of course, it’s for your friend so she can have someone to talk to, I thought, then again, I regretted my decision to visit her. I could’ve told her that I couldn’t come because of sleep. Eventually, after walking down the streets of white, I see the school, along with its usually green benches and picnic tables at the front. Sitting on one of the benches sits a winter-clothed figure. A figure I recognize.
“Hello”, Sam exclaimed.
“Hey there Sam. How’s the job at the convenience store”, I asked.
“Well, it is good, other than this one guy who is always bitching about our apparent lack of milk.”
“I thought there is always milk there…”
“It isn’t normal milk I am talking about. I am talking about almond milk. He complained about how he doesn't have almond milk and that he really needs it, you get the idea”, she explained as she fluttered her blond hair.
“I guess. I mean, all he wants is almond milk. No harm done here.”
“But he should’ve gone to another store. Instead, he stayed. I even, ARRG, I just can’t. How does someone handle these types of people?” She then took out a cigarette and lit it with her lighter. “You know, I wish I could get away from here and just live in Regina. Just live a normal life.”
“I mean, it is pretty normal here. Nothing too crazy at least. I have heard a lot of crazy stuff in Regina.”
“What crazy stuff?”
“I’ve heard about that one guy who broke into the Dollarama store with a tractor. Broke in just to get a pack of hot dogs.”
“That just sounds made up. How do you know?”
“Got it from my Dad. He’s a cashier now.”
“What happened to being a security guard?”
“Better pay. It is-” At first, I didn’t notice. It was a soft shaking at first, so I assumed it was the train passing by. It became stronger.
“Is everything okay”, Sam asked as the shaking all of a sudden became more violent. So violent we can barely stand. We fell into the cold snow and the shaking continued. It continued for a few more minutes. At this time, it felt like the world was ending. I could hear glass breaking, and wood falling on the road, I was scared. With my face on the cold ground, I could hear the hum of the earth, shaking. Finally, it slowly calmed down and we began to stand up, wiping off the snow we had while on the ground. “What the hell is that?”
“I think that was an earthquake. But, why”, I said, stuttering over my own words in confusion. It shook me up, literally and mentally. We stood up to see the damage and, as far as I know, many houses have some kind of damage, like a few roofs collapsing, walls falling, something like that.
“Well, looks to be a bad one”, Sam said, still perplexed but scared as I am.
“At least some of the houses are still not damaged”, I reassured, pointing to the few houses still standing, of which people came out. Some ran towards the damaged houses while others looked in confusion. A few more came out of the damaged ones, seemingly unharmed.
“Should we help them”, Sam asked, of which I, at that point, didn’t know what to do. A thought then went through my mind about my parents.
“I have to go back.”
“Back where?”
“To see if my parents are okay.” We said our goodbyes and I ran on the road. I saw a few police cars sitting beside houses, even fire trucks. The police and firemen are just as confused as everyone else. It seems the damage was widespread, but not as bad as I thought it would be. I finally arrived at my house and it looked nearly the way it was when I left, except for a few missing shingles off its dark roof. I wanted to go inside. What prevented me, at least at first, was the damage that might be inside. What if they are hurt? They’ll die if you do nothing. Those thoughts dreaded me throughout. I knew my Mom and Dad were in there, I knew I might get hurt. Do I wait for the firefighters to come or do I go in? I simply stood there, out in the cold. A final thought came in to make my decision: fine, I’ll do it anyway. Shouldn’t be too bad, is it?
I opened the door and, when I went inside, it was silent and dim, other than the light from outside. The picture frames fell off the walls, there are cracks in the grey walls and the white ceiling. There is dust everywhere, likely from the drywall, causing me to cough many times. I tried to look but it was dark. “Hello”, I hollered. I got a response.
“Hello”, the concerned but deep voice of my Dad responded. A blinding light came from the kitchen and shone on my face. “Kate? What are you doing here?”
“I am just worried you guys are hurt”, I remarked.
“Hurt? I nearly died”, Dad crowed sarcastically.
“We are okay. We are under the table”, my Mom said with reassurance.
“This is so cool”, Matt cheered. I thought oh, at least they’re alive. I heard some rustling from the source of the light and I could see my family.
“Are you okay”, Mom asked.
“No, I’m okay. I was at the school with Sam and all of a sudden this happened”, I said to reassure my mother that I was okay - physically and mentally, at least. I then heard sirens just behind me on the road. It’s the police.
“Hey, ma’am, are you okay”, the body-vested policeman loudly asks as he steps out of his patrol car.
“Yeah, I’m fine, my family is in the house”, I replied. The policeman ran towards me and stepped in front of me. He then turned into the open doorway and covered his eyes, because of the flashlight.
“Hey, is anyone there?”
“Yeah, we’re okay”, my Dad responded.
“Okay, this house is not safe to stay in. Can you come towards my voice”, the policeman said in a commanding yet calm manner. The light turned off and footsteps came slowly towards the door. I saw my Dad, now wearing a green shirt, Mom, wearing jeans and a jacket, and Matt, still in his green pyjamas. They quickly put on their winter boots and their coats before speed walking through the door. The policeman then took one last look with his flashlight in there. “Anyone else in there?”
“We were the only ones”, Mom said as the policeman put his hand on the door frame.
“Did any of you get hurt”, the policeman asked. They shook their heads.
“Well, maybe my opinion on this town. Maybe a documentary”, Dad joked, but no one seems to be into his jokes now. The firemen then arrived a few moments later and offered us blankets.
“Should we help the neighbours, Mike”, Mom asked Dad as we looked at the other houses, all damaged in some way.
“I guess. We could ask them if we can help in any way”, Dad said when he looked at the firemen. “I mean, we’ll be in their way.” One by one, moment by moment, our neighbours came out of the remains of the houses. Luckily, it seems everyone is okay, minus a few injuries. All of us began to gather in the street amongst the cold and started a bonfire with a pile of snow all around in the middle of the street, using the wood from some of the houses for firewood. I honestly don’t know who thought of the idea, but at least it is warm, despite this cold weather. Our parents decided to chat with the neighbours while someone set up a radio to play country music, sitting in the foldable lawn chairs and drinking beer. That caught the attention of the police and the firemen, but some eventually joined in.
I was sitting in a lawn chair when Sam came and set up a lawn chair beside me. “Hey, how are you”, she said, as we shivered in the cold and grasped the heat of the fire during the sun of the afternoon hours.
“I’m fine. The parents are fine. Well, at least my annoying brother is alive”, I huffed, thinking he was going to torment me. Sam looked at me with an expression of inquisitiveness. “What?”
“I mean, that’s what brothers are for. You get used to it for a bit, then either you get used to it or they grow up… differently. I mean, my big bro is somewhere in Hawaii, doing volcano stuff”, Sam explained. “What I’m saying is, they are necessary in life. You may not have fun with them, but they can save you one day.”
“Well, Matt isn’t saving me now”, I rebuked. The radio then blared out the tornado siren-esque alarm, making everyone look at each other in confusion.
“Well, just about time”, one man said. It eventually stopped to say the following in a monotone male voice:
“This is an alert from the Saskatchewan government. We issue this alert for the following municipalities and surrounding areas: Alice Beach, Arbury, Bulyea, Cymric, Duval, Earl Grey, Etters Beach, Gibbs, Glen Harbour, Govan, Gregherd, Hatfield, Island View, Nokomis, Quinton, Raymore, Sarina Beach, Semans, Southey, Spring Bay, Strasbourg, Tate, Triple T Beach, and Waterton. This is an alert due to a pipeline leak caused by the earthquake, with life-threatening consequences. Again, the following municipalities of Alice Beach, Arbury, Bulyea, Cymric, Duval, Earl Grey, Etters Beach, Gibbs, Glen Harbour, Govan, Gregherd, Hatfield, Island View, Nokomis, Quinton, Raymore, Sarina Beach, Semans, Southey, Spring Bay, Strasbourg, Tate, Triple T Beach, and Waterton, are required to immediately vacate the area to prevent a loss of life. Stay safe.”
“Is this a joke? A pipeline leak”, another person asked.
“A whole area for a broken pipeline”, another suggested. Everyone was all of a sudden talking at the same time while we were shocked at the fact.
“A pipeline? Leaking? Why such a large area for a leak”, Sam asked.
“I have no idea”, I said, confused as to the events happening. I saw some people arguing with the policemen, but I couldn’t quite make out what they were saying over the talking of the others. Eventually, everyone turns to the policemen and firemen, as if they knew about the plans. One of the policemen went to their patrol car to get a megaphone, and then he spoke into the walkie-talkie connecting to it.
“Hey, everyone calm down”, he bellowed and most gave their attention to him. “My name is Russel Simmons, and I am the chief of this department here. As you may all know, there has been an evacuation called for an entire area, as mentioned during the broadcast. t. I did not know this beforehand, just like every one of you. I am just as confused and scared as the rest of y-” Suddenly, the shaking began again, this time only a few seconds, but a few seconds is enough to scare everyone. “Stay calm! Everyone stay calm”, the chief begged the panicking people. Slowly but surely, everyone calmed down. “We can get through this. Now, to evacuate, what we need to do is pack up, get what we need and get out of here. Meet with us at the Tempo gas station to get fuel, if necessary. After that, we will go south to Regina, where we’ll be staying.”
“What about the stuff in our houses”, a woman asked.
“For that, we can’t go into the houses. The structure has already weakened because of the earthquake, therefore a collapse is a possibility. We cannot risk a life here, so we can’t”, Russel explained.
“My house looks fine, why can’t I go in”, an older man asked.
“Like I said, sir, the houses are at risk of collapsing.”
“What about the water? We can’t just leave it around in our houses. We need that”, a younger man said.
“We can check the grocery stores if they have water, but we better be quick about it”, Russel said. Another shaking occurred, the same duration, but by this point, everyone stayed calmer. Dad then met up with us.
“It is time to go”, Dad suggested. “We have to make it to Regina, as soon as possible.”
“Well, I guess it’s time to go”, Sam said. We then share a hug. “See you later… sometime.”
“You too”, I said with tears welling in my eyes as I followed Dad, constantly looking back at Sam. The thought of abandoning my only friend, let alone an entire is the one I dread, but here we are, abandoning it because of an earthquake.
“It’s going to be okay”, Dad reassured. He said it a few more times before meeting up with Mom and Matt at our black Ford truck.
“Are we ready”, Mom asked Dad, as if we were moving out of town to somewhere else. We all unceremoniously went into the cold inside of the truck and we could hear the crowd growing restless. Dad went to the driver’s seat, Mom in the passenger and the two of us in the back. Dad got the truck started and drove out of the spot. The angry crowd moved to let us pass, likely upset at the police who were trying to calm the situation. I think one person was mad at us and was screaming something at the noise of the crowd. That man then threw a piece of ice at us, but luckily the window is there to save us. Once we passed them, we sped off through the streets. Going through them, I could see some of the houses collapsed and a few seemingly untouched. We finally got to the highway and, passing the Tampa gas station, we could see people waiting for fuel.
“Should we stop for gas”, Mom asked.
“I don’t think so. We have a full tank of gas and there are too many people. With the situation we are in, things might be bad to worse”, Dad explained. “If we could stop in Bulyea, to pack more up.”
“When are we going home”, Matt complained.
“No, honey, there is no home left for us. Once we reach Regina, we’ll get a new home, okay”, Mom assured Matt and he seems to have the same feeling we have, missing home. At least we can agree on something for once. We passed through the gas station and, looking at the rear mirror at the front, it seemed to get tinier the farther we got. We sat in silence along the icy road with banks of snow. The inside of the truck got warmer and more comfortable. Luckily, there are fuzzy blankets in the truck to snuggle in.
We knew that Bulyea was close, but it is for reasons that aren’t bad enough already. Black, dense smoke in the distance, lofting to the east. We already knew something bad happened.
“Should we even go to Bulyea”, Mom asked. Dad looked at her and back in the road and gave a nod. “We can’t. Remember what you said back there? It is worse here-”
“I know. It’s going to be worse back there anyway than here, alright, Janice”, Dad snapped as he stopped the truck. This is the first time I have seen Dad this mad. I am starting to think he is just as afraid as us. “I’m sorry, I just missed home, but we had to get out.”
“I know, so do I”, Mom said and they shared a kiss. “Now, what?”
“Go to town and salvage what’s left.” Dad drove the truck and went into town. There, we noticed where the smoke came from. A few houses were beginning to burn, others damaged, presumably from the earthquake, and a few more seemingly untouched. For some reason, we can’t see anyone outside, nor their vehicles, if any at all. It seems to be like a ghost town.
“Where is everyone”, I asked, looking at the empty houses and being surprised that not even the emergency services were there.
“I don’t know. Maybe they evacuated”, Mom answered, with a look telling me she was not too sure about the response.
“Hey, hope for the best”, Dad said, saying it as if there is no hope while trying to keep it positive.
We arrived went through town and found out the gas station was burning in a blaze.
“So much for water”, Mom said, looking at the burning wreck. “Hey, how many kilometers did we travel?”
“Why is that important? Worried about gas”, Dad chuckled, in an attempt to cheer the mood. “I can chec- wait, how many kilometers does it take to get here?”
“Uh, fourteen”, Matt responded. My Dad looked at the dashboard in a confused state. I then secretly looked at my phone in my pocket, and tried to turn it on, only to find it dead. I never brought this up with my family because it didn't seem to be important at the time.
“Seems we travelled a kilometer but yet wasted half our fuel. I don’t know what is happening to the truck”, Dad said, further confused. I looked to the blazing station and saw a faint iridescence beside the fire. I was about to point it out when Matt spoke.
“Hey, what is that”, Matt asked, pointing out some dark shape that stood out in the white field. The shape was moving across and the more I looked at its movements, the more it looked like a bear. It then seemed to notice us and seemingly ran towards us.
“We are going now”, Dad yelled and put on the gas, driving off quickly. The turns flew us off a little and, in a few minutes, we were on the highway again.
“What was that”, I asked.
“I think that was a bear.”
“Why did we take off?”
“It was chasing us! Would you like to know what happens when we stay?” Dad then gave out a sigh. “I am sorry, but I had to make a choice.”
“I guess we won’t be staying”, Matt questioned.
“No, we won’t. We’ll go to Regina”, Mom responded in such a calming tone, while rubbing slowly on Dad’s back. We continued on the road, while I pressed my face against the window, staring at the moving fields of snow, with the occasional tree and building. I then slowly closed my eyes, bringing me to a world of darkness.
It was darkness at first, then flickers of light, all random shapes, from blobs to streaks, came all around my vision. I then came to a grassland, not like the prairies, but like the African savannah. Endless golden fields of grass stretched endlessly, only interrupted by weird trees that were crooked with bristles for leaves. The sun is setting in a brilliant series of yellows and oranges. I then heard rustling behind me. That is when I woke up, but not on my own.
“Hey, Kate, you need to see this”, Matt said in an odd confusion. I looked around and thought of nothing unusual.
“See wha-” I faltered as I looked ahead at the road. Ahead of the truck, the road is cut off by some kind of wall. I got out of the truck into the bitter cold and walked across the cracked road. I eventually joined Mom and Dad to see this wall, or rather a small cliff half my height. It seems someone cut the whole road and got the ground where I am to sink. I could even see what was below the road. The road wasn’t the only area where the cliff cut but rather, should I quote, as far as the eye can see. “What is this?”
“It might be some kind of fault line”, Dad said.
“Fault line? What is that”, Matt asked.
“You know, cracks in the ground that cause earthquakes? The one you learn in school about the San Andreas fault? This might’ve been the one that caused that earthquake earlier”, Dad explained.
“So a new fault line is appearing in Saskatchewan”, Mom said.
“Seems to be.”
“So, how are we going to get to Regina”, I asked. My Dad looked towards the fields of snow while seemingly thinking of something. It was a few minutes before we heard something odd. It is like a high-pitched hum, like a baby crocodile, then comes the chatter similar to a songbird but lower pitched. We all went to the truck, except Matt, who was more curious than afraid.
“Hey, I can see something”, Matt advised. Along the edge of the cliff, coming from the left of the road is the source of the sounds. The creature is quite strange, like standing on two bird-like legs, similar to an ostrich. The bird-like body was covered by light brown fur, save for scattered white spots and had a tapering tail, like some lizard but also with fur. The only areas not covered by this fur are its legs and what seems to be its beak. When it got closer, I came to make out its appearance. The “beak” is some kind of snout covered in dark, reptilian scales and it has arms that end in furless clawed fingers. I knew what it was, and it was frightening as it was confusing.
“Matt, come back. That is a dinosaur”, I yelled, hopefully persuading Matt of his curiosity. As soon as I said that, the creature stopped.
“Dinosaur? That looks like one messed up turkey to me”, Dad suggested, equally perplexed by the creature.
“Hey, Matt, come back! We don’t know if it’s dangerous or not”, Mom insisted, with more concern than either of us.
“But it’s not doing anything bad. It looks cool”, Matt said, not even concerned about this weird creature.
“Listen to your mother, Matt”, Dad hollered, in agreement with me and my Mom.
“Oh, come on, we could make him do some tricks.” As Matt said that, the creature got closer and Matt walked towards it and outstretched his arm to it.
“Matt! Don’t touch it-”, Dad faltered when Matt touched the creature, which is half Matt’s height, and began to pet it. The creature then began to purr, like a cat but more bird-like.
“See, not so dangerous. Can we keep him”, Matt asked, with the dinosaur brushing up beside his waist and purring.
“No, we can’t. We don’t know what it is”, Mom pleaded and I do agree.
“Oh, please, I promise I will take care of him. It’ll be the coolest pet ever.” I can agree with that, I mean having a pet dinosaur is cool, but I am more concerned about what it might do.
“I think it’s a bad idea”, I yelled to Matt.
“No, it won’t. Please”, Matt begged. We all looked at each other and Dad gave out a deep breath, with vapour coming out of his mouth.
“Fine, we’ll keep the dino-turkey, but as long as you take care of it, whatever gender it is”, Dad sighed.
“Yes! Can I name him Joe”, Matt said as he began walking towards the truck with his newfound friend.
“Joe? We don’t even know if it’s even a boy.”
“I don’t care. I want him to be a boy”, Matt protested.
“I guess Joe it is”, Mom said as she turned to Dad with a look of regret.
“I guess we have a family pet now”, I said under my breath to no one. We then went back to the truck and I sat in. Dad went to the driver’s seat as usual and Mom in the passenger. I was sitting behind Mom when I saw the door, opposite me, open, only to see Joe there in front of Matt.
“Hey, do you wanna meet my family”, Matt beamed when he picked him up. I can see Joe’s face more clearly. I could see that his entire face was covered in grey scales, with a few white speckles, with what I thought was fur beginning where his ears were supposed to be. Joe looked at me with a bird-like expression with his bird-like eyes. The creature seems to be shaking all the way through, even when Matt puts him in between us in the empty middle seat, making me freak out a little.
“Why are you putting it beside me”, I shuddered. “Did you make sure he doesn’t have rabies?”
“Don’t worry, he’s just cold”, Matt reassured. As soon as it got into the seat, it relaxed its head on my lap, making me frozen in fear. In surprise, Joe began to purr.
“What is he doing”, I asked.
“I think he likes you. You can pet him if you want. He’s harmless”, Matt assured. I then cautiously took my hand out and touched his brow area. It felt cold and reptilian, and I moved my hand towards his fur. I realised they were feathers, not quite like a bird, like fuzzier. I stroked across his spine and he was cold. Matt then covered the feathered creature’s body with a blanket.
“What should we do now”, Dad asked.
“I don’t know. Maybe take another route”, Mom responded. Dad then started the truck and turned it around.
“The rural roads would be hell. Maybe go to Earl Grey, and see if there is anything there.”
“Hopefully not like Bulyea.” Dad then looked at his rear-view mirror to look at Matt.
“Hey, do you know what, uh, Joe eats”, Dad asked.
“I don’t know”, Matt said, with a look like he doesn’t know.
“I mean, he has to eat something”, I said, now more comfortable with Joe. I lifted his lips to see a series of fangs lining his jaw. Joe didn’t take that too kindly and nudged. As he did that, he rolled to his side to reveal his hands. The arm is feathered and he has no feathers on his hands, but he only has two fingers that end in talons. “What, why does he only have two fingers”, I asked.
“Maybe a genetic defect. Like my cat Fluffy with his extra thumbs”, Mom suggested.
“Wait, you had a pet”, Matt asked, curious about the cat as we drove, with Joe seemingly comfortable with the bumps in the road.
“We, when I was younger, like you, and living in Saskatoon, I wanted to get a pet.” Mom explained as she looked at Joe. “Well, not quite like you have. Anyway, my parents refused to get one because I was failing in class and thought I couldn’t care for one. One day, I think a snowstorm was happening. I was walking down a street, fighting against the snow. I stumbled upon a box, covered in a blanket lying on the sidewalk. I looked inside and I saw kittens”, she said, her eyes glossy.
“Sadly, most of them died in the cold, except for one. An orange, fluffy kitten, fighting for its life. I took it, put it into my jacket and took it home. I entered our house and the kitten was fine, but my parents were furious. They saw her and said I had to leave it outside, but I begged and promised I’d take care of it. They said we could keep the kitten, as long I kept the grades up. So, I named him Fluffy, because he’s fluffy.”
“Where is he now? Why is he not here”, Matt questioned.
“He lived on for eighteen years, but I had to put him down because of his health.”
“Why didn’t you buy another cat”, I prodded.
“We just couldn’t afford it, we don’t have enough income. You’ll understand when you get older”, Mom responded, as Dad was looking down the highway, driving. I looked down and Joe was sleeping. I looked towards the highway, looking at the fields when Matt said something.
“I need to go to the bathroom”, he said, holding at his groin. I also need to go to relieve myself, but Matt called it first.
“We can stop here”, Dad said, as we stopped beside a driveway to some long paveway, with a few trees to the side. I recognized it through our trips to Regina: we have arrived at Gibbs. Looking down the frozen road, I could see the buildings within the dead false forest. I took this moment to speak my urge.
“Yeah, I need to go, too”, I declared. Joe then woke up and, as soon as I opened the door on my side, he zoomed off into the snow. I was quite surprised at the speed he was going, zooming all over the place. Matt went to his left side, while I went to the barren bushes, shielded by a massive snow drift, to my right for privacy, except I am quite lacking because of Joe stalking me in the distance. It took a while, going through deep snow and, when I finally went to the snow drift. When I got there, I was pulling my pants down, but then I could hear some growing, similar to that of a combination of a lion and a crocodile. Where is that coming from? Never mind, it might be Joe, I thought.
“Go away, Joe”, I said, thinking it was Joe, seemingly angry at something. Nervous, I finally got to business, a little slow because of Joe nearby. I then heard the growl again. This time, I looked up and saw Joe, but he wasn’t growling. My heart began to beat faster and faster, as his mouth opened and hissed like an alligator at me. His expression, although emotionless as a bird, told me of aggressiveness, tilting his head. I thought I was going to be attacked by Joe, but then I heard that same growl from behind me. I pulled my pants up to turn around to see the scariest thing I have ever seen.
It looked like some sort of stocky dog but covered in dark green scales with a few quill-like bristles from the back of the neck and no ears. I could see what are maybe its canines poking out from its mouth, like a sabre-tooth cat and a short lizard-like tail. It looked more reptile than, well, dog really except for its eyes. I could see the hunger in its eyes. I heard more growling to my other side and saw another of those things. Joe began making that baby crocodile noise and we ran to the truck. I turned around and ran.
“Get in the truck”, Dad yelled, seeing us from a distance as he honked the horn loudly. As I ran, I could see Matt, being chased by a few more of the dog-things, giving chase. Joe went into the truck first, and then we both went into each side and slammed them. Dad then sped off very quickly, scared they may get to us.
“What was that”, I panted, confused.
“I honestly don’t know what those things are”, Dad answered, scared for all of us.
“I want to go home”, Matt pleaded, tired from running away from those things.
“Don’t worry, we’ll be home soon. I promise”, Mom reassured.
“Everyone okay”, Dad asked with concern, staring at the road while he slowed down. We all looked at each other in fearful confusion, even Joe. I looked at Joe, and he then looked at me. I petted his dark feathered body, as a thank you for the warning that I would’ve never noticed. “Okay, we are moving on”, Dad concluded. We sat in silence, although I was still petting Joe.
“Hey, Matt, do you know what dinosaur he is”, I asked Matt.
“I don’t know. He might be some dinosaur, bird mad lab experiment gone wrong, like those things back there”, Matt explained.
“Or some mess-up chicken in a lab”, Dad suggested, still looking at the road.
“I don’t think he was a chicken”, Matt rebutted. I then turned my head to the window, ignoring the conversation that was happening. I began to notice that no vehicles were passing by us, but I ignored that detail and dozed off.
I saw those same lights in the dark vision of my closed eyes. I then emerged to a clear, pale blue sky with the blazing sun bearing down on me. Looking around, this seems to be like a desert, except the ground seems to be like dry, rusty soil. It feels hot here, hotter than one of those summers in my former town. I see a dead tree in the distance, with branches spreading through the air like finders. I heard a sound behind me.
“Wake up! We are here”, Matt said as he shook me awake. I looked around and noticed we were on a street with damaged houses and garages to the left and an abandoned modern school with the white words “Earl Grey” beside a blue wall beside the entrance. The school lies hiding behind a metal fence with dead trees behind it. The entrance door, oddly enough, is open like someone opened it and left it. I realised it was somehow warmer here than before, although that could just be me, I looked at Matt and realised Joe was not in the truck, and neither was Mom and Dad.
“Hey, where’s Mom and Dad”, I asked Matt.
“Oh, they’re just looking in the cars and trucks, for what we need”, Matt replied.
“And Joe?”
“Oh, just running across the road.” Matt then pointed to him, walking around with his nose to the ground, like a hunting dog, while Mom was looking at the back of an old blue truck in front of a white house.
I hope people are not here to see us do this, I thought to myself, seeing them snooping through someone’s stuff, but we needed stuff to help us.
“Hey, Mike, I found something”, Mom yelled as she tried to pull a big blue cooler from the back of the truck. Dad then came from an RV down from the truck and came and helped her. He then put it down on the road and opened it. They both plugged their noses and backed away.
“Fish? Who leaves fish in a cooler in the back of a truck”, Dad gagged. Joe then looked up, seemingly in excitement and ran towards the cooler. He stuck his nose in the cooler and pulled out a pike. He plopped it on the road, his foot stepped on the fish and put his mouth onto it, tearing a piece of it and swallowing it. “At least somebody likes rotten fish”, Dad rasped.
As we looked in surprise, we could hear something from the school. The minute we heard it, a loud boar-like roar came out from the school. We thought it was a very big boar when it came out, but the more we looked, the more we realised it was something else. Its body is like a boar, but its face is like a lion’s and the snout of a camel, with teeth somewhat like a bear’s when it opens its enormous mouth to gargle like a pig. Mom, Dad and even Joe are taken by surprise, making our parents run towards the driveway, while Joe towards our truck with his gorged fish, standing by us. The boar-thing then stopped a few feet away from my parents, seemingly in a defensive stance, hooves scratching the ground. We are scared for our parents, preparing to see this thing rip them to shreds.
It gave one last roar and walked towards the cooler, knocking it over with fish spilling out. It stuck its snout in the fish and swallowed one down. They then slowly walked around the creature and steadily fastened their pace until they were at the truck. We all quickly got in and Dad backed up quickly.
“What the hell was that”, Mom panicked.
“I don’t know, a pig from hell”, Dad responded. We looked at Joe, swallowing down the fish while the rotting fish smell remained. It looked at us in confusion, as we were. We silently laughed for no apparent reason, probably as a mechanism to try to replace the fear. We then heard a shaking in the truck, startling us. We realised that the hell pig was tearing at the bumper of the truck like a lion would. Dad hammered the horn, making the thing back up in surprise. Dad took this opportunity to back up very quickly towards the intersection and turned to the left, quickly avoiding the creature. We sat in silence, except for Joe who was chirping.
When we went down the street, the houses, as usual, were damaged but we saw other vehicles, the first we had seen. Some were parked along the street, others stuck on one lane like city traffic but paused. Weirdly enough, there are no people in the vehicles, nor anyone outside. Most of the vehicles have one or more doors open like people got out to go somewhere. We drove past all the vehicles in the other lane. There is one vehicle we passed by that is on fire, most of the paint already off to reveal the metal beneath, only to be turned into a rainbow of browns and blacks by the dancing flames.
“What. Happened. Here”, Mom slowly asked, as confused and terrified as us. We had a feeling of dread, seeing all the abandoned vehicles.
“That’s the least of our worries. We should be looking for supplies”, Dad responded.
“Hey, how much do we have”, Mom asked Dad, worried about using up the fuel.
“Well, we got a full tank of gas and travelled a hundred kilometers”, Dad responded, more confused. “Nothing makes sense here and I hope we don’t stay here for long”, he muttered.
Eventually, we passed most of the vehicles and reached the veterinary clinic. The small, intact structure stood there, seemingly looking over the icy driveway. We then spotted an old, brown truck and we saw something that set it apart from the rest of the vehicles we’ve seen so far.
“It’s on”, I said, gleefully, with hope that, at least, we aren’t the only ones here. The headlights beamed brightly, and we realised it was getting dark. We also noticed that the street lights aren’t turning on.
“I thought there was no one here”, my Mom said, unsure of the connection between the abandoned but running truck and the lack of people in this town. At one of the intact houses, ahead of us, partially blocked by the trees, we saw what seemed to be bright light coming from one of the windows. What person would go into a house after an earthquake, I thought, thinking about our house back home.
“Someone’s here”, Matt loudly notified, as we all shushed him and that is when Joe is trying to push the door with his snout. “What is he doing?”
“Stay here”, Dad calmly ordered, opening the door, but Joe scurried out and went somewhere else.
“Hey, come back”, Matt called out, with no success. Joe eventually disappeared into the night, never to be seen. Matt then had tears welling up in his eyes like he was about to cry. I hugged him to comfort him.
“He’ll come back some time”, Mom reassured, trying to calm him down and looking at Dad. Dad nodded and grabbed a flashlight that was equipped in the truck. He then walked slowly towards the house, step by step, being shone by our truck’s headlights. He looked back at us and put his hand up when the light in the house moved. It seems to move towards the front door of the house. Emerging from the house is a person walking down the steps, cloaked in darkness. Dad then took a few steps back as the figure came. Finally, the figure stepped into the light.