I've been on ozempic for a little while now and it was covered for prediabetes. Insurance is cutting me off. Do I have type 2 diabetes? Historically I have two tests of greater than 126 blood glucose fasting. When I Google it it says that makes you diabetic. But no doctor ever put that on my file

I took a job I don't like because I need to pay the bills. I have to get up at the crack of dawn, bust my muscles and get covered in filth all for less than my last job paid me. Today I'd finished one task and I was waiting for a coworker to bring me something so I could begin my next task. I was hot, dirty, and fatigued because I didn't sleep well last night, and even so I'd been giving it my all for the whole morning. Desperate for a little rest, I took the opportunity to sit down, just for a minute. I didn't even take out my smartphone, just sat and waited.
It hadn't even been a minute when my boss coincidentally arrived at my workstation and chastised me like a child. He demanded that I always work, doing what little I could to clean up my station.
I wish I could have yelled at him about the above circumstances, but all I said was "yes, sir".
By the time my coworker returned, it was time for everyone to take their lunch break.

Sorry for the lack of photos, but this one is easy to follow since the repair was so simple. This should be the same for all of the blue headphones with an internal amp
The blue ella has been discontinued, so it's selling for about $110 on amazon, down from its $700 MSRP. If anyone saw my review, I think they're easily the best closed backs under $200 by a country mile right now, with the ability to be used without the internal amp, with it to just cleanly amplify a weak source (amazing for my miyoo mini which has a stupidly weak amp) or with an "analogue" EQ mode that bumps the sub bass and warms it up a bit. I've been using them and adoring them, they're superb gaming cans. HOWEVER, I noticed the amplifier battery was lasting an absolutely wretchedly short amount of time, like 45 minutes. Turns out a battery powered device sitting in a box for like 7 years means the battery isn't gonna be very happy.
However, the repair was dirt cheap and super, SUPER easy. The battery is a very standard 3.7v, 1000mAh unit with the standard charging PCB covered in capton take inside the right earcup. I ordered a replacement one off amazon for $9 along with a $4 roll of double sided electrical tape. The replacement battery is 5x34x50mm, but the original is about 4x36x60 with another 1mm thickness of double sided adhesive foam. But the new battery fits just fine with some double sided tape that isn't 1mm (I used 1mm tape and it was a hair thick, but still worked. regular double sided tape is ideal) and the repair was a snap, only requiring a spudger or something to gently pry the earcup off (a butter knife would work) a t5 torx bit, and two little dots with a soldering iron (you should also get some solder and a little flux, some isopropyl alcohol and a Q tip to clean up the flux) and a pair of pliers or flush cuts to snip the connector off the replacement battery and strip back some wire. A pair of tweezers would be helpful too.
Firstly, remove the earcups (do both sides since it's easy and makes accessing the rest much easier) by gently placing the spudger or device between the brown of the earcup pad and the black plastic trim, and prying until it pops, then just work around, they'll pop right off. The bezel is very sturdy but be mindful of not nicking the pleather cups, they are glued to the frames and replacement pads are only really available through a custom pad maker like Vesper.
Now all we need to work on is the right side. Unscrew the 6 long T5 torx screws holding the driver and its bezel in place. The two short t5 screws just hold the bezel to the driver and can be left in place - removing them makes the whole thing a bit more unwieldy. The driver and bezel come right off, there's no adhesive. Don't lose the foam pad that goes between the driver and the rest of the earcup. Now remove the 2 t5 screws on the little cross brace that holds the battery down and set it aside.
Now we can remove the old battery - Safety dictates that you desolder the battery first - just follow the super obvious two wires to the board, make note or take a picture of which is red and which is black, and desolder them. The solder joints on mine were quite aged, so a touch of flux and fresh solder was necessary, but this is about as easy as soldering work gets. Once the battery is desoldered, use your spudger or pry tool to gently pry on the sides of the battery to release the adhesive. it's not super strong adhesive and mine came free with minimal effort.
Now place some double sided tape on the replacement battery and put the replacement battery in its place. the little battery "tray" makes lining it up easy. Align it the same way the old battery was, with just tape on one side. My new battery had a JST connector, so I snipped it off and stripped the wires back about 2mm. Tin your wires by touching them with some flux and fresh solder. Then I used some tweezers to hold the wire down while I soldered them in. Wipe up any excess flux with a little isopropyl alcohol on a Q-tip, make sure the solder didn't bridge between the positive and negative, and put it back together! Don't forget the little cross brace that clamps the battery down first, then orient the foam/drivebezel pack in place and screw it down. Pop the ear cups back on by pressing down on their very outside edge to make 'em clip into place. Charge it up and enjoy!
(one piece of advice when screwing screws back into plastic - when you put the screw into the hole, first turn it backwards until you feel a little bump or click, and THEN drive it in. This prevents cross-threading and accidentally chewing up the threads. And be mindful of not over-tightening. They aren't going to come loose on their own very easily, plastic is a lot grippier than screwing metal into metal, so you don't need to torque anything down.)
If your amp switch ever starts to get wonky, I also discovered in my disassembly adventure that the knob just engages with a regular slider switch like a gameboy uses. You can just touch some contact cleaner in that switch if it ever gets weird.
Overall, I was really impressed at how easy they are to repair and how pleasantly standard the battery is. I was worried that maybe I'd only ever just use them unamplified (which isn't too hard, as I understand they're fostex T50 drivers) but for maybe... 15 minutes of work start to finish, they're as good as new.
Now I just need to see how long these vinyl pads last before I have to get vesper audio to make me some proper leather replacements. I hate pleather.

i scored 67.8% in boards and im eligible for jee mains [bheem ki shakti] . i got 42%ile 8L rank even after being in a coaching since 11th and dummy school. Yes, i had really good privilege with me and i took it as granted. I realized its all my fault for not being consistent to coaching and to my studies. today is my cuet exam tho i have no hope in this exam too [ dad asking me to take a drop ] i barely studied for this exam because im too fixated on the drop thing. so my question is should i really consider taking a drop even after realizing my mistakes and my bad habits?
you may ask what i did in those two years? in eleventh i got really bad hyper reactive air way disease so i was unable to attend offline coaching did online but again lacked consistency. twelfth was going good until our coaching started adding eleveth topics which i barely knew so i tried to cover up but failed
will keep this part short, i fell in love with an amazing partner who is understanding, i cant focus on my own studies and hobbies, ldr, very sensitive at times, need them to reassure me, feels like im neglecting my responsibilities.
i know this will be hard but im ready. 'do saal me kuch nhi kiya to ab ky hoga?' its true, but im ready to take the risk and try it one more time. i need to know how one can stay consistent and disciplined.
i know asking people from internet will do nothing but i genuinely have no body to share and get suggestions and little advice that i can try to implement in my life.

I give my girl home made toys and treats, I feel like every day or every other day. I never want her to be bored during the week cause I sleep early so I constantly am making toys and puzzle treats for her to do. I don’t want to spoil her though in the case I forget one night and she’ll get upset 😂 how often do you do toys and Bordem breakers? Any tips to share on new toys to make? I already make little tissue balls covered with tp strips so she digs them out, I do stuffed tp rolls, sticks dipped in flour and food and hung, and peanuts occasionally when I can find them in the shell. Any more ideas? Lol

Long story, I found out my XY genetic donor regularly raped my late mother throughout my entire childhood.
I was most likely a product of him raping her. Like, almost certainly.
I've never felt like I belonged in this world. I spent my whole childhood waiting until I was 18 and could finally get away with killing myself. Knowing it would all be over at 18 was the only thing that got me through those years.
Now, nearly a decade later, obviously my plan didn't pan out. And every single day since my 18th birthday, I've lived with that intense regret. Why didn't I do it? Why couldn't I have had the guts?
I could have died never having to know this. I could have died before my blocked memories came back. I could have died before realizing I was a victim of CSA. I could have died not knowing my mom spent the last decades of her short life being raped. I could have died before I ever got the chance to be raped(1st time at 18 after I should have died).
I could have died without all the pain I've experienced the last 8 years. But instead I'm here, struggling every single day.
I can't even fucking cut myself anymore, because the boyfriend will see it.
I'm just so tired. I'm tired of fighting. I was born into a world that didn't want me, and I've never fucking lived. As much as I love my mom(RIP), she was never a mother to me. I never had the chance to be parented. Neglect was the most positive aspect of my childhood haha.
I keep trying to do the things that are supposed to make things better. I SERIOUSLY try. I've been in therapy since like, 14. I've tried all the meds. I reach out to family and friends for support. I've called the hotlines. I've been a child covered in self harm scars, begging an adult to care. I've had more breakdowns than I can remember, pushing people away, quitting jobs, moving, eetc. I've dealt with substance abuse, and then mostly recovered. I've signed safety contracts with so many people.
No matter what I do, who I talk to, where I go, nothing is ever going to fix this. I don't want life to occasionally get a little easier. Taking an elevator to hell instead of the stairs still lands me in hell at the end of the day.
I have never had even 5 minutes of "carefree". Everyone around me gets to relax once in a while. I'm either breaking down and spiraling, or totally numb. I have never gotten a fucking break, and I don't know how much longer I can keep it up.

Several days ago on Tumblr u/Aly0151 asked me:

So how'd you get into the Little Nightmares franchise? What made Six your favorite character?

And I answered it (though it wound up being longer than I'd prefer) and thought I'd copy and paste it here too so the Six Defence Squad can know a little more about me. Also, just to clarify, I don't have any of the games, so I haven't played any of them, so everything I know about them is from reading posts and watching videos:
That’s a bit of a tough question, since it’ll test my memory.
I think I heard of LN and learned a bunch of stuff about it from a video called 107 facts about Little Nightmares, and that video included the 2017 comics, so I was able to know about their existence fairly quickly. Plus I misremembered a part of the video and thought that Six’s name was something like Eliza, lol. The video also included pointing out Shadow Six though I didn’t remember it at the time and when someone pointed out “look on top of the table” of the Nome hunger scene, I thought it was the silhouette of the Lady’s head, so I thought that the Lady was there, knowing what was happening in the room and possibly made Six eat the Nome. Especially since she is seen entering the elevator a moment afterwards. And when I saw the secret ending of LN2, I was like “What? Why is there a shadowy copy of Six now?”. I saw Tericho’s “is Six a villain or victim?” Video and he showed one of the moments where Shadow Six appeared in LN1 and I was like “What?! She was in the first game too?!”. Rewatching the 107 facts video, it confirmed the existence of Shadow Six in the first game.
And I don’t remember who, maybe GamingBeaver, I learned some more about the events of the game, and I saw play throughs of LN1 and got to know the events of the game. And when I watched a video on the events of LN1, it of course was the classic “Six is the Lady’s daughter” conclusion (before the devs debunked it). Though I do like AUs where the Lady and Six are mother and daughter. And it was TheLeaderboard's videos of what happens in each part of the DLCs that informed me of what happened in RK's journey.
I think my interest in LN fizzled out a little until GamingBeaver made his video on the ending of VLN, so I thankfully was able to learn of RCG and a piece of Six’s story that a bunch of the fandom doesn’t know about even to this day. So I got to know a little more about Six.
Then some time passed and I somehow heard of LN2 being in development and was excited about it. And I didn’t find out of when it was released until a couple months after its release. I saw and watched GamingBeaver’s video about the story of LN2 and that’s where I learned of the “Six is the Lady” theory that I despise so much. And I watched CoryKenshi’s play through of it to learn more about the events of that game, and I’m still bitter about how he so easily dumped Sasha Six in favour of Baggy and that he denied that Six is a kid just trying to survive and even reprimanded her for “doing this to all of these people”, you know, the people who tried to kill or eat her. I’m still bitter at CoryKenshi for that.
I’ve been really into LN since the release of the second game and I’m still into it currently.
As for the girl in question, I think she’s my favourite protagonist mostly because she was the one I was introduced to first.
It took me a bit to realise that Six doesn’t have anything visible on her legs, so I got scared that she might not be wearing anything underneath the raincoat, but then I watched Crazy Cowboy’s video “Funny Chef Six” and it contained this official PNG of Six:
https://preview.redd.it/cyuulkiuqg0d1.png?width=300&format=png&auto=webp&s=30d146aee549e7e895c6d4d3ff994277f6c5da46
I spotted the white shorts (though I thought they were yellow at first) and felt relieved that she does have other clothes on under the raincoat. And VLN and LN2 reinforced that fact.
Then VLN and LN2 added more to her story and character, which made me like her even more.
And after LN2 came out and time passed after that, I myself went through character development with judging Mono and Six. At first I didn’t want to believe that Six was selfish and sadistic (which Beaver said she was in his video) and I blamed everything on Mono, but later GamerSault made his “Who is Six?” video (which is private now 😞) where he talked about Six’s selfish side but he d*idn’t *demonize her for it, and I also saw a long but great comment on that video where they compared the sh*tty treatment Six gets from the fandom to the sh*tty treatment Chara gets from the Undertale fandom. These two things helped me accept that Six does have a selfish side, though I still don’t believe that she’s sadistic, especially considering the hypocrisy from the fans when Mono does similar things that gets Six labeled as sadistic for, but he does them to a bigger extent and often did them first.
I don’t place all the blame on Mono anymore, but I still do vehemently sympathize with Six. One because I spent my teen years watching Mr Enter’s Animated Atrocities - where I got my strong sense of justice from - and two, I think I slightly see myself in Six. Call me petty or childish but I relate to Six in the way that her efforts are swept under the rug. Back in school, in P.E we were doing a little exercise where we repeatedly go into the starting position that athletes go into for sprinting, and for some reason we were put into pairs for this. I was paired with someone who apparently had something wrong with her legs so she couldn’t go into the ‘sprint start’ position (understandable), so she decided that I had to do it for her turns as well as mine (not understandable). And when I tried to refuse (I couldn't stand up for myself back then, plus the pose is uncomfortable for me) she just whined "BuT yOu HaVe To". And another time in college, we had to design a magazine front cover for a bricklaying competition and I think I misheard the lecturer because everyone made 6 different covers, while ended up making 12, because I thought that’s how many we had to make. Both of these instances I did literally twice as much work as everyone else, but my efforts were not acknowledged or compensated at all. It's a loose and very specific connection between me and Six, but it's still a connection, so I think I feel some resentment when the fandom does the same thing but far, far worse to Six.
So yeah. Sorry for the long read, but this is how I got into Little Nightmares and why I'm a really strong defender of Six.

I've been using Overseerr and a single PushOver account to get notifications when requests are made, available etc.
I'd like to, for two family members who are using my flex, with as little work on their end as possible, enable them to receive notifications when their (and only their) requests are available or when there's a issue I send out.
I've had zero issues with PushOver for myself. At $5, I was just fine with that, even though it doesn't seem to support movie cover art or anything beyond basic text.
What's the best way for me to accomplish this? I'm not really looking to do the teams subscription plan, I don't value this use that much and will only ever be used for Plex. I also see PushBullet is an option.

Later this month I've got to appear to either contest or agree with a small claims filed by our local city income tax department, in which they are saying they did not receive my 2020 city tax filings. I haven't had a chance to dig through my records yet, but there is a good chance I may have forgotten to send the city portion in that year. Our city only accepts old school paper filings, and I've forgotten one other time but got it covered before it went to claims. However it's not the actual filing I need advice about, but the amount they are claiming I owe plus the interest they are trying to add on to it.
According to the paperwork, they began interest charges on April 24, however they did not finalize the letter until 4:10PM on April 24th as their official stamp says, which means I didn't even get a chance to receive the notice until the 25th. I looked up the case and the original cost was around $600 according to the courts website. On the paperwork it is now a little over $900 plus the interest beginning on the day before they contacted me about this. I called both the municipal court and the income tax department and mentioned I wanted a discovery on the actual amount owed. The lady at the income tax department told me that they couldn't provide me with a discovery because the city was taxed as an average that year, so everyone paid the same amount and the only way I could see what I originally owed was by filing for the 2020 year.
Again, not debating on whether or not I did or didn't file - I will find out when I double check my records tonight. However, I feel like I am getting the run around about the cost of this and that they are inflating it as much as possible while trying to ignore showing me the actual numbers. I also feel like starting interest before they've even mailed the letter seems a bit...unlawful?
Can anyone give me some advice or options here? Was asking for a discovery the right thing to ask, and is there anything else I can do to get them to actually prove their calculations to me? The extra $300 added on plus a new 8% interest fee seems a bit much over one small tax filing.

I am a parent of a troubled teen and this is my first post on Reddit. I registered for an account, just to make this post.
About three months ago, I found a post on Reddit discussing Red Hawk Academy in Littlefield, Arizona and it made me so angry I posted a response.
You can find the original posting at troubledteens Beetlejuicenewton.
Here was my written response to the original post:
"This comment is absolutely inaccurate and incorrect. My daughter has been there for months. I speak to her every week and we exchange letters throughout the week. This is the third program, she has been in and hands down the best program. You should not make accusations when you are not the parent and not actively involved in the program. I highly recommend this program. The staff are incredible and have helped my daughter tremendously. To all parents out there, call the school and ask to speak to Valerie. I have told Valerie that I will gladly speak to any parents who are interested in the school. This program has saved my daughter.) and was utterly shocked about what was being said about Red Hawk Academy."
Not understanding how social media works (in this case Reddit), I did not know that one's opinion can be removed from a site if the comment is contrary to the original post.
After posting this comment, I received an email from Reddit that my post had been removed and I was banned from the conversation. It took me awhile to calm down, but now I am in a place where I create a thoughtful post discussing my life with a troubled daughter and our experience with RHA.
Unlike the troubledteens Beetlejuicenewton post, I will not ban individuals who disagree with me.
This is my story...
In 2020, I started to notice a difference in my daughter who was 13 years old. I started to see a shift in her behavior. She was being inappropriate while on the internet, hanging out with troubled kids, and being very unkind to her family members. She started to lie, which turned into chronic lying. She started to get mad and hit her head into the wall. She never hit her head hard enough to receive a concussion, but it did get our attention. One day, I sat her down to discuss her behavior and took her phone. When I opened the phone, she had a screensaver that was a short clip of 2 toddlers being hit by a car. When I asked her why she had this as her screensaver, she said she thought it was funny.
Fast forward a couple of months....she was in therapy that was completely useless. She managed to make a handful of the therapist cry or get really upset. My daughter seemed to find humor in upsetting others. Her lack of empathy was beyond scary. She continued to hit her head into the wall every time she was upset. She then threatened to hurt herself, but it seemed to be more of a threat than anything else.
Fast forward three years...from the age of 15 to 16....she tried to "kill" herself twice (actually didn't really hurt herself, but it did get her into the hospital), hospital dependent (always wanted to be admitted to the hospital), suspended from school for inappropriate behavior (my daughter and her boyfriend were making out at lunch with hands down each others' pants), shoplifted (she shoplifted back-to-back days and took her little brother with her to provide cover), unprotected sex (I only found out because she thought she was pregnant), lying all of the time (she forgot how to tell the truth), cutting herself and still hitting her head into the wall, treated her little brother like crap (he would come to me crying, and tell me that he just wanted a "normal" sister), experimented with drugs (she only told me because she was feeling off and was scared), allowed strangers on the internet watch her sleep)....the list goes on and on.
This all happened within the timespan of 1 year! She was diagnosed with depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, and borderline personality disorder. (For parents with daughters who have been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder, there is a great book I found on Amazon - When you Daughter has BPD: Essential Skills to Help Families Manage Borderline Personality Disorder by Daniel S. Lobel, PhD.)
Our family finally hit the breaking point. My husband and I were fighting all of the time, my son was so upset about his sister's behavior, and I was on the verge of having a breakdown. I cried all of the time and was so very sad about what was happening to my daughter.
We decided that we needed to send her some place. We could not manage her and she needed more help than we could provide. We sent her to a wilderness camp in Utah that came highly recommended by our therapist. I was scared to send her there, but I did not know what else to do. During her time at the wilderness camp, we had a neuropsychological assessment conducted, which resulted in an autism diagnosis. While she was slightly on the spectrum, it was clear that her behavior was driven by her borderline personality disorder. Within 5 weeks at the facility, we were advised that she was not a good fit for the program and we needed to find a therapeutic boarding school for her.
The wilderness program recommended a therapeutic boarding school in Oregon. We enrolled her in this program. She was a hot mess...she would not get out of bed and refused to go to school. She starting hitting her head into the wall (again), which the staff would not stop because the facility was a "no touch" facility, and the staff would just attempt to "redirect" her. She would punch and kick walls. Within 4 weeks of being at the school, the school called us and told us that we needed to immediately come pick her up because she was threatening to harm the staff members.
We felt desperate and full of despair. We did not know where to turn. We found the one and only program that has helped her....RED HAWK ACADEMY.
I initially called and spoke to Valerie. She and her husband, Sonny, own the school. Instantly, I felt heard and understood. During that initial conversation it came up that the school had received a reputation (not at the school's request) as the school that would take the girls that were kicked out of other programs. When I was filling out the paperwork (which is required for all programs), I got nervous because I had to sign a form that provided RHA with temporary guardianship. I prayed that this would not backfire on me. Unlike the other schools, RHA could restrain the girls when absolutely necessary. People instantly make accusations when the word "restraint" is involved in programs. What people do not understand, and unless you are in the unfortunate situation where you have a kid like my daughter, programs that restrain are absolutely essential. My daughter continually hurts herself and I need someone to stop her.
We dropped my daughter off at the school and hoped (with all of the hope we had left), that RHA would help our daughter. Programs, like RHA, are designed to help troubled kids. By no means, is this a vacation for your daughter or a break from the real world. My daughter tried everything she could to get kicked out of the program. She went so far as to orchestrate a fight with another student so they could both be kicked out. Unfortunately for her (and fortunately for us), she had consequences none of which involved removal from the school.
I have been so scared that we could not find help for her and that she would end up on the street when she turns 18 and most likely would end up homeless, uneducated, and in prison.
My daughter has been at RHA for 6 months and she is now at the point where therapy can begin. She has been so combative and defiant that it took 6 months for her to realize that she was not going anywhere and the only way she would leave the school was to complete the program.
While there have been good and many bad days, I am finally seeing a version of my sweet daughter. The daughter who used to hold my hand and tell me she loved me. For parents who are struggling, know that there are parents who understand your pain, understand the feeling of being out control, and understand how you become unsure of yourself (and your parenting skills). Just remember that you can change the trajectory of your daughter's life by getting her the help she needs. Welcome the opportunity to send her to a therapeutic school, like RHA, where she can get the helps she needs.
Thank you for reading this ridiculously long post, and I hope you can find some peace in knowing that are safe, supportive programs that can help your daughter!
I am going to write another post that specifically discusses RHA. Feel free to reach out if you have any questions.
​

Hi, so I’m fairly new to the K-pop concept. I wanted to know what all goes into a K-pop comeback. I’m more thinking of the advertising and design side of things, I’m thinking about editing or making a comeback for a group I like since I edit a little . It would be great if you could link some examples of girl groups! How they are posted and in what order they are posted. Like what all happens: their online presence on socials and how they announce; comeback announcement, schedule, mv teaser, tracklist, merch, album cover, individual concept photos, posters,etc. what is the order to all this?
Love all the help I can get!

first
Luna VI query: Set the source to the leaked files of the first reconnaissance operation of Irisa.
Certainly!
Luna VI query: What did Ryo do during the first hour of the war?
***
Ryo had already reached a state of full awareness after waking up, and yet he hadn't moved an inch, immersed in his inner world as he thought about what he and Elysira had done at night.
And what a wild night it was.
The way that she had skipped the journey to go straight for the finishing line had caught him unprepared. Still, with the mystery of their physical compatibility out of the way from the get-go, Ryo had been left with a lot of time to explore the other hiccups and perks of this interspecies endeavor.
From the occasional accident with her claws to the new possibilities her tail brought to the table, Ryo had enjoyed everything.
There was not an ounce of regret in him, but the memory of their last act lingered incessantly in his thoughts—a vivid Recollection of Elysira’s tail wrapping around his leg and letting silence prevail as his arm shyly enveloped her, allowing them to fall asleep side by side.
The one memory that held him in place, fearing their next interaction when the slightest of his movements would inevitably wake her up, mirroring what had happened all in the previous mornings.
What would she say?
Would she think that they are in a relationship now?
What would he do if the concept of casual hook ups didn't exist for the Irisians?
Ryo touched his face and shook his head, instantly deciding it was time to start his morning routine to distract him from those absurd thoughts.
The brain IO interface captured his intention, turning on the lights on the ceiling with maximum brightness, something that he was sure would wake her up at once given how sensitive to change all Irisians were.
And yet he was wrong.
Elysira’s head tilted away from the light as eyelids fluttered, but the only other thing she did before stopping moving was strengthening her grip on his leg quite a bit, making him realize that her tail had not let go of him the whole night.
Upon noticing how numb his leg felt, Ryo propelled his body upwards, intending to uncoil her tail from his leg and start his day. Hopefully, Elysira wouldn't mention what they did, and he too would be able to pretend it never happened.
However, the moment his upper body lifted from the ground and he got a full view of her body, he was unable to remove her tail from his leg, captivated by a simple but powerful sight.
With her hands inside the pockets, Elysira had used his jeans to restrain her claws, putting herself in a very uncomfortable position, likely afraid of hurting him during her sleep.
His eyes widened, dispersing his previous train of thought from existence. The hand that was supposed to be dealing with her tail moved toward Elysira's exposed neck instead, aiming to wake her up with a gentle touch.
And as if he had just perturbed the stillness of a calm lake with a stone, a barely perceptible ripple of yellow spread on her skin from the contact with his fingertips. It traveled through her neck, reaching the soft lines of her face, and even traveled down her long hair strands.
At the same time that it felt wrong to be able to take a peek at her emotions so easily, Ryo couldn't help but wonder—which other colors had the darkness stolen from him? While immersed in this question, Ryo kept caressing her neck until her eyes opened slowly, resetting all the back spots of her body at once as consciousness took control over instinct.
Elysira’s grip on his leg loosened when she realized she was overdoing it. Her gaze started scanning every inch of him, starting from the accidental scratches of her own making and unashamedly stopping at places she had not seen before.
Unbothered by her curiosity, he even removed some of the loose strands in front of her eyes and threw them behind her long ears to make her job easier, feeling some apprehension only when she lost interest and sought eye contact.
Traces of purple appeared around her black spots as she spoke. "What do you humans do after... what we did?"
Ryo winced, but his tone was gentle. "Silly girl!" He felt deep regret for how he had skipped the part of Irisian relationships in favor of politics when she was teaching him about her species. "It could be everything or nothing."
He expected some intense reaction from Elysira, but there wasn't a lot of emotion showing. As he searched her skin, he also realized he was unable to look at her the same way as before.
From seeing her small breasts, which he now knew for a fact fit on his hands, to the very memory of all evenness that he now was able to associate with the sheen her skin exhibited from certain angles, Ryo realized he had lost the ability to gauge her emotions without feeling a hint desire.
She noticed how long he was staring at her and a hint of yellow appeared. "I don't need everything, but nothing is not enough!"
How did Ryo fail to see that this conversation would inevitably happen when they were having fun at night?
"Oh!" He was unable to keep his mouth shut, which resulted in red and purple manifesting on her skin as he felt the pressure for a quick reply.
He had heard the Irisians speaking terms such as chosen, mate, and family, but Ryo didn't know much about this, and now was not looking like a good time for asking for clarification.
The translator would do its job in conveying his intention. But what would he say? Friends with benefits maybe? He gave up that one on the spot; he didn't consider their previous relationship a friendship, and somehow, he felt a dangerous desire to want more than that from her.
Under the pressure of his previous mistake, he told her the highest relationship he was willing to have without a care in the world for consulting his superiors. "Is girlfriend good for you?"
Elysira’s eyes widened as her skin maintained the same tones. But it lasted only a second before a golden hue took over, leaving little room for her black spots. "Wait, are you serious? I never thought you would consider anything more than being my exclusive pair."
"I am serious, but what's the difference?" Ryo instantly felt he could have gotten away with being just friends with benefits.
"Two differences." She took her clawed hands from the pockets of his jeans and pressed them against his neck in a fast but controlled movement. "One is implied trust." Her head approached him slower as if she would kiss him, but instead, her lips diverted toward his ears where she whispered, "And the other is a promise for the future."
"That seems alright."
As he said that, Elysira had already started taking little bites on his earlobe, her other hand joining around his neck while her tail was sneakily pushing the rest of her body on top of him.
"This will have to be quick, we-"
Ryo was about to give up the time they had for breakfast, when a powerful explosion shook the ground, causing the whole tent to vibrate.
Elysira’s pointy ears began to twitch and her body receded, trying to get of clue of what happened as she displayed purple. "I hear nothing."
"This was not far from here; I don't think it was a landslide." Ryo summoned a window with all the cameras outside and found nothing unusual, even with the infrared inspection.
Elysira could see what he was doing since they had never left the shared augmented space.
"Can we see what Amara is doing? She might know more than us."
He still was incapable of referring to her as his girlfriend even in his thoughts, but he still felt a hint of pride for her quick thinking. "Let's see."
He quickly summoned a live feed and promptly instructed the AI to go through the recordings of the whole night. "Nathan and that princess are still inside the tent. Time to go there."
Ryo wasted no time explaining, quickly standing up to begin the search for his underwear. The floor was still littered with paper sheets, and there were even some opened water bottles around, but he still found what he was looking for before pulling his jeans from under Elysira’s butt and getting dressed with haste.
He wore his shoes but didn't bother with his shirt and jacket, just taking his already loaded gun from the holster and getting some spare ammunition before heading outside cautiously.
"I'm going with you." She got out of the tent almost at the same time as him, proving that not needing clothes had its advantages.
"Stay close." He activated the infrared view mode and scanned the surroundings just to be sure, then hasted his steps towards Nathan's tent which was about forty meters ahead.
There was little he expected would go wrong on such a short journey, but Elysira’s ears began to twitch halfway through, prompting him to stop advancing. "Hear someone?"
"Something." She then used her tail to point uphill, in the direction where the rest of the group had set camp on the previous day. "I think it's a drone."
"Fuck, I hope you are wrong." He raised his 3D-printed revolver and felt like cursing more at the fact he didn't even have a proper pistol, pulling back the harmer and getting himself in front of Elysira.
Thanks to her acute hearing, when he heard the buzzing of the drone, his gun was already pointing in the right direction. Upon getting the first glimpse of the flying object and noticing how fast it was moving, he didn't hesitate to do a partial activation of combat mode.
The world slowed down for a moment, allowing him to see the device flying among the very few beams of blue light that made their way through the canopies. He didn't wait a single second and corrected his aim slightly to the left before pulling the trigger.
Bang!
The drone was torn to pieces and many parts fell about twenty-five meters away from them, at a distance that any explosives wouldn't hurt himself or Elysira.
When his eyes found her behind him, there was yellow and purple on her skin as she asked, "What if it was friendly?"
"The owner can send the bill up the chain for all I care." Ryo lowered the gun and did a full scan all around once more, only to find nothing again.
Her tail wrapped around his arm as all purple on her body disappeared, leaving only a hint of yellow. "Amara won't be happy if it was hers."
Just as Elysira spoke, a circular door opened on Nathan's tent, and Amara took a step outside with red filling her body.
Ryo pictured a scene of a princess complaining about her lost drone, but things only got more complicated instead.
Nathan emerged after her, and the pair began to argue loudly about what to do now that a war had broken out; Amara wanted to march uphill to join her guards, but Nathan held her by the tail when she was about to leave and prevented her for moving, saying it would be too dangerous.
Their argument turned into a messy mixture of the present situation with Amara sulking about a wasted night, which led Ryo to exchange a look of surprise with Elysira.
But their surprise only lasted a moment and Ryo decided he couldn't let those fools keep wasting valuable time.
Clap.
Clap.
Clap.
He had their attention now. "Please don't tell me you're mad because the plant lover couldn't get it up."
Under normal circumstances, Ryo had no doubt his assholish behavior would only instill shame and improve their cooperation.
However, he forgot to account that he was not wearing a shirt, leaving all his scratches exposed while Elysira was disheveled by his side, which caused Nathan's jaws to drop followed by Amara throwing an indignant gaze at Elysira and then at Nathan, who gave Ryo the feeling he might snap at any time.
"Why are you here?" Nathan's calm voice didn't match his clenched fist and rigid posture.
"Information. I want her to tell me what she knows about this war." Ryo had learned about the war by overhearing their previous argument.
Surprisingly, Amara was cooperative. "My brother's army found our position. They were not aware I was here with Nathan and ambushed the rest of my people and Zara; you destroyed their drone but if they saw us they might have a good reason to come here."
"Fuck!" He turned to Elysira and ordered. "Go back and gather my things. Take the essentials first, we are leaving."
Elysira used her tail to squeeze his arm in acknowledgment and rushed back. But when she had barely taken a few steps, she stopped as her ears moved. "More drones are coming!"
After alerting him, she ran to accomplish her task, leaving Ryo in the company of just Nathan and Amara.
"Isn't that great?" He grumbled to himself, but his voice carried loudly, obtaining the pair's attention as he raised his revolver again.
Knowing that the enemy was probably aware of their position, Ryo used infrared view mode to ensure they weren't using the drones as a distraction to pull off an ambush.
And that didn't seem to be the case when the first machine appeared, flying downwards in zigzag from the concentration of trees uphill.
Again Ryo used a partial activation of combat mode and aimed at the drone, yet this time more of them appeared, leaving the cover of the woods in groups of three until there were nine of them in total. But they didn't even try to get close this time, choosing to hover next to the canopies more than two hundred meters away from him, and assuming something akin to a structured formation.
This was extremely weird and enough of a reason for him to retreat a little, getting closer to his tent and taking cover behind a tree.
Nathan and Amara moved too, the botanist getting inside and returning with his gun while Amara's colors blended with his tent becoming hard to spot.
Assessing the new situation in an instant, Ryo concluded it would be better not to engage and retreat considering that those drones would be hard to take down at such distance. But things changed again quickly when the AI triggered a pop-up window, showing that several of the cameras he had set up in strategic places were capturing movement.
And what he was seeing now were several armed groups of Irisians heading towards their position, confirming Amara's supposition that the rebels were coming for them.
With the situation getting grimmer with every passing moment, Ryo thought of a possibility for what the drones might be doing, but his mind was still refusing to believe that the rebels could be as organized as his worst-case scenarios were giving them credit for.
To test this, he immediately tried to contact the space station through radio transmission, and since being found by the enemy was no longer an issue, he set the transmitter to maximum potency to validate his test.
Unable to establish a two-way connection.
He frowned even though that was not totally unexpected.
With only a few minutes at best before this place was filled with enemies, they would have to leave fast or they would be at the mercy of the enemy.
But first, there was something he wanted to say to Nathan, who now was using his tent for cover together with Amara. "Listen up, those fuckers are jamming our comms and they will be here at any time. Take the MLBCS and find a clearing to use it, I doubt they can interfere with the laser. Just don't forget that your immediate safety comes first or else you might not be among the living when the pod arrives."
Ryo and Nathan were technically enemies, but the last casualty in the war between Earth and Mars had happened several years in the past, ensuring that he had no reason to wish any harm for the botanist even though he didn't like him.
As for Amara, it was a little different. He hurried back to his tent without saying anything to her. And he did that not because he wished her harm, but simply because he didn't understand what she had at her disposal to offer any useful advice.
"Wait, what are you gonna do?" Nathan shouted from a distance.
With the adrenalin of seeing how many Irisians were coming helping his sincerity, he shouted back. "I'm not leaving the planet unless mission control finds a way to save Ely too."
After that, Nathan and Amara disappeared from his mind as he took cover behind his tent, slamming his hand against the foldable fabric many times to get Elysira's attention. "Hurry up, we can't stay here any longer."
She left immediately after, struggling to maintain balance as she used a hand plus her tail to carry his backpack, while her gun threatened to tumble from her gasp in her other hand.
And besides, one thing that Ryo’s eyes were immediately drawn towards was the clothes she was wearing—his clothes. While her legs were still exposed, his jacket still covered a bit more than her hips, loosely engulfing her slender frame like a billowing sail.
"I put the food and water in your backpack." She let go of the heavy item right over his feet as she put the gun on the ground and lifted her arms for him to recover his jacket and t-shirt. "You can get dressed while the tent folds."
He might have allowed her to keep the jacket if not for it being an inconvenience to her, so he just took it, making the first time he saw her wearing clothes a very short experience.
"No time for that, it won't fold with all the paper you left on the ground." He said as he swiftly slipped his arms into the sleeves of the jacket and zipped it up in one smooth movement.
Ryo was already considering which path they would take to flee when he noticed something terrible—Elysira’s skin had just been filled with gray as tiny black spots began to appear and disappear as if rain on the sand of a desert.
"What's it now?" He asked, trying to hide how unprepared he was to deal with this.
"Nothing has changed." Elysira averted her eyes. "I'm a burden to you just as I was to Amara. If I had-"
"Oh, shut up and quit the self-pity!" Ryo realized he was being too harsh, but still went on to finish it. "The paper is our mistake and I'm staying because I like you. This simple. Now get your gun and use your goddam camouflage, just like that princess is doing."
Ryo felt awful after saying this, and Elysira seemed quite taken about as she stared at him with wide eyes.
A moment later, however, she bent over and took the gun from the ground, her exterior blending quite well with the surroundings.
Ryo felt bad for her, but now there was no time to talk. "We run now, let's go."
The sound of his own steps was all he heard as they were putting some distance from the tent, making it so that he had to check on Elysira every couple of steps he took to ensure she was following him.
It was only when he heard some gunshots from far behind that he felt her claws tugging at his jacket from behind. "I hope Nathan is like you."
***
This was an account based on what Ryo did during the first hour of the war. The previous narrative is based on the events of the morning of the twentieth day of the exploratory mission of Irisa. According to your current settings, no queries will be suggested.
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So I just met with a new psychiatrist for an hour and did that song and dance where we cover basically a whole bunch of stuff from childhood on. Moods, triggers, sensory and cognitive issues, past trauma, the works. He mentioned after we went through it all that in addition to ADHD and bipolar, he believes I may be on the autism spectrum as well and is going to do a more in-depth assessment with me.
This is something I looked into once before around 11 or 12 years ago, when I didn’t have insurance or much money, but I did meet with someone once. This is also around the same time I first wondered if I might be bipolar, but I was really just trying to figure out what was wrong with me because it was clear it wasn’t just depression. The guy I met with back then said he couldn’t be certain or to what degree without more time with me, but based on what I’d described, thought it could very well be a possibility.
I feel kind of weird about this? I guess because on some level, I’m worried people will think I’m fishing for things to be wrong with or different about myself in order to play victim or co-opt people with these conditions? Or maybe I just feel scared that it might all be true and that’s just one more nail in the coffin for my ability to be close with anyone without fucking it up permanently.
I also worry that autistic people I know or have known would judge me as not autistic enough I guess. Imposter syndrome, which is something I already contend with as an AMAB non-binary person who is very accustomed to people ignoring my gender. I guess because I don’t present femme or androgynous enough for them. I’ve developed a level of hypervigilance about all this stuff.
Has anyone else run into this kind of dogpile of unexpected diagnosis? It’s a lot to take in and I’m still trying to process how to contend with it all, let alone what it means for my ability to function properly in society, which has already been a consistent problem for me since I was a little kid.