Isa akong batang laking mahirap. All the kinds of bullying naranasan kona and kahit I am on my adult stage na bakat na bakat padin sa ala ala ko kung ano ang mga napagdaanan ko during my years of schooling.
During my elementary days way back mga 2004-2010, baon ko 2 pesos a day pero hindi pa araw araw may baon. Minsan nag aabot sila mama at papa ng 5 pesos ng monday and that's it for the whole week. I am too innocent in those time kasi Im proud to say na never ako nag cocomplain to my parents regarding that,siguro dahil alam kong wala din naman magbabago if I ask them kasi I know na walang wala din naman talaga sila. Minsan yung mga kaklasmayt ko pa noon tinatawanan ako pag tinutulog ko lang ng recess time namin kahit yung tiyan ko tumutunog sa gutom, while them enjoying their meals and have money on their hands to show off. They don't wanna be friend with me either kasi di ako nakakasabay sa kung anong meron sila kaya ako yung typical na batang PAPASOK sa skul ,UUPO,TAHIMIK at magsasalita lang pag kinakausap. Ang tanging alam ko lang non is disiplinado ako ng mga magulang ko kaya naman never ako nanlimos ng kahit ano or nainvolve sa gulo or na guidance sa skul, if my conflict man non sakin at sa klasmayt ko, umiiwas nalang ako at mananahimik kasi takot akong magkamali eventhough sinasabihan na nila ako "DUWAG" "LAMPA" etc.... One time may pinapa project si teacher sakin that requires money to buy it. Sinabi ko din naman kila mama pero they can't provide so pagpasok ko ng umaga sa skul, sobrang kabado ako kasi lahat sila may maipapasang project and ako lang wala. Then when my name called by our teacher sinabi ko yung totoo but the teacher just say "Baka gusto ako pa magprovide para sayo" sabay tawa. Until then naging hobby na nya akong pagtawanan infront of his co teachers at sa mga students at ako lagi inuutusan taga bunot ng puting buhok nya.🤣 well nakakatawa nalang sya sakin now pag naaalala ko
Fast forward... 2011 Highschool days... I enter highschool like elem na walang wala din. All my things are old, from bag to notebooks, yung lapis ko parang nasa 3 inches nalang ang haba kasi di ko napapalitan. Even my slippers have butas na which is naging reason ng bullying din. Yung ibang klasmayts ko laging kinukwestyon bakit daw ganun di ako mabilhan ng mga magulang ko pero di ko sila sinasagot. Just like elem days, ako yung tipo ng stujanteng tahimik lang sa upuan, kaya ang tingin ng guro namin sakin "MABAIT" pero may mga guro padin na hindi talaga ako nagugustuhan dahil sa bagay na wala ako na meron madalas mga klasmayts ko. Malayo ang skul namin sa mga bahay namin kaya nagbabaon kami ng pang lunch namin. Madalas baon ko araw araw is itlog,pancit canton na isang piraso tapos ginagawa kong pang recess at lunch na yun. Even that thing I was questioned lagi by my klasmayts but I don't answer them. I was so lonely nun kasi wala naman gustong makipagkaibigan sakin, even if may groupings, I was left alone and doing my activity alone. If you guys are wondering how's my marks in school? I was a regular student and never ako na fail sa subject ko kasi yun din habilin ng magulang ko sakin. I was so obedient to my parents even those times na pinag aabsent nila ako para magtrabaho sa bukid at para may baon ako sa school.Then the next day, I will be punished in school for being absent without telling them my reasons. I know how hard my life is kaya nangangako ako sa sarili ko na I have to finish my studies kahit anong mangyari. There are some teachers who love humiliating me in front of many students for the things I have, such meron daw ako shoes na old pero walang socks, butas ang pantalon, and ngilaw na ngilaw ang puting uniporme signs of it being old enough. One thing I am struggling about is yung yellow pad paper, yun kasi gamit namin ng highschool and most of them have it tapos ako pag humihingi ako ayaw din naman ako bigyan, kaya ang ending I'm using notebooks as alternative for it. My teacher would question it again pero same thing, my silence is my response. In those years, teachers are allowed to beat students as sign of disiplina and I was beaten as a punishments for not providing projects and unattended classes dahil sa need ko kumita ng pera para may pambaon. Pag binabalikan ko siya, awang awa ako sa sarili ko. And those people who treated me that bad, I still remember them but I forgave them. Masakit lang pag naaalala ko😭 I just can't imagine na nalagpasan ko siya na ako lang magisa at walang nasandalan even my parents. All those bullying I have received from my society, inako ko lang magisa yun at none from my siblings and parents knows about it.
Fast forward...2015- 2019 College... This one is the most legit na sobrang hirap. Pero bago pa mag umpisa ang semester nun I confront my self na kahit anong mangyari " I have to be a regular students,walang bibitiw at wag na wag babagsak sa kahit anong subjects
1st -2nd year college ko, I tried everything I can, to provide for my own tuition fees and allowances. Yes nagbibigay sila mama at papa pero hindi kasya, minsan 150- 200 lang kaya nila iabot for a week allowance, ang bording house ko laging delayed ang bayad, and my tuition is always on hold kaya laging suki ako ng special exam. Pinasok ko mag work as taga dilig ng halaman and care taker ng isang bar and grill for the night and study in the morning. I have no choice but to do it cause ayokong mag stop sa pagaaral. Kaya naman pag sumasahod ako sa part time ko, binibili ko ng mga sapatos sa shoppee and then I resell it on facebook market online around the city. After my class ng afternoon dun ko sila minimeet up sa city and there I earned money. Tho, of all the efforts and hardships na ginagawa ko still my studies is my top priority. I was so payat sa sobrang pagod, puyat at stress.lagi pa akong nag nose bleeding and I was so worried for my health pero tuloy ang laban. Again, none from my siblings and parents knows about it. I kept it all alone and di din naman sila nag tatanong kasi they thought I am doing fine dahil wala din naman silang narerecieved na reklamo sakin. BULLYING? ofcourse di padin ako nakaligtas jan, I was called "EWW ANG ITIM, MUKHANG MATANDA kasi di nakakapag ahit ng balbas at nakapagpagupit" minsan sasabihin pa nila "Huy kumain ka naman para ka nang kalansay" without knowing my whole story. One time I cried inside the confort room kasi I couldn't help myself na mainggit sa mga classmates ko nun na after class they will be having a talk about san sila mag lulunch if sa Jollibee ba, mcdo or sangyup. Samantalang ako, after class I was so busy meeting people with their orders. Minsan nadadaanan ko pa sila sa fast food having a good time while ako may bitbit na malaking basket puno ng sapatos na idedeliver.🙂 If my mandatory na event sa skul na need attendan, I used to ask people I don't know if may pwede ba akong mahihiraman ng susuotin tapos sasabihin nila try nila hanapan ako pero they then laugh at me afterwards. I feel so ashamed of doing it but I have to. So ayun na nga iniignore ko lang yung mga moment na tinatawanan ako sa looks ko, sa mga bagay na wala ako na meron sila. Basta focused ako sa acads ko nun at sa pagkita ng pera.
During my 3rd yr college. Yung part time kong work nagsara so I was forced to stop working with them na. And so yung pagbebenta ko ng sapatos nalang ginagawa ko. I was so lost that time kasi diko alam ako gagawin ko. Malaking tulong yun sakin lalo na 2yrs nalang kailangan kong tapusin sa pagaaral at mas malaki ang expenses ko na.Isang araw papasok ako ng gate sa skul and there are posters around our campus about scholarships and yung minimum qualified average. I have know idea if abot ba ng average ko dun sa offer ng scholars. so I run towards our registrar to request for a certificate of my grades. My world just stop for a while and I'm in tears kasi naabot nga. 86.04 yung average ko and the asking is 85.0.lang. moving forward, I got the scholarship and it helps me with my tuition fees. Kaya ang pinoproblema ko nalang non is bording house ko. Until meron na namang ibang offered na scholarships sa city so kahit sobrang haba ng pila,tiniis ko kasi I know it will save me. Luckily God is so good to me kaya I got them. That's why sa huling taon na pagaaral bago grumaduate, everything goes well and smooth because of those 3 scholarships. I Gave up selling shoes and focus sa exams nalang until I manage to graduate.....
July 2019.... FINALLY GRADUATED AND A CERTIFIED DEGREE HOLDER OF PSYCHOLOGY....
2024 update about me? I am now in a good path, I took a career that is relevant to my degree and still want exploring more things...

The worst of it is that if they label it as an "excuse" for uncontrollable behavior (or mannerisms that people don't understand but only those with Autism cannot control it.), similar treatment to a criminal claiming 'mental' insanity plea in a courtroom just to avoid prison. - To be honest, this type of response coming from people unaware of autism is disgusting, disrespectful, and ignorant. To add to that, people misuse the word 'Autism' in regards to the way the word is used in memes, like do they even know what Autism really means?
I think for Autistic people, it'll be important for parents or carers to teach or help them learn how to control their anger if something triggers their tantrum, as in certain situations it can result in actual legal repercussions, like dealing with law enforcement or airport security as throwing a tantrum right in front of those people can get them in trouble depending on the situation, so a parent or carer will need to assure the other party that those with autism do not pose a threat to anybody else, as they will not understand it at first.
At the end of the day, it comes down to how it's portrayed in media or news, similar to how homeless people are often presented as druggies or crooks. In this case, autism is overtly exaggerated in movies, TV, anime, or cartoons giving the public a false or unrealistic portrayal, this also applies to all mental illnesses for that matter, as in most movies making people from the asylum portrayed as killers or a criminal of some sort.
How would you be able to defend yourself in court as a person with autism if you are accused for a crime that YOU did not commit in the first place? While the prosecutor is trying to frame you for the crime using your autism against you to puting you behind bars? The thing with illnesses without a cure, is that they cater more to children more than grown ups without realizing that children become grown ups who have to live with it.
Let's say you're the witness of the incident, it can go in various ways:

1. You saw the cop using brutal force against the individual, but later the officer uses your disability as a leverage to frame YOU for instigating the incident, which means you're the one in cuffs, not him or her.
2. The cop is unaware of the fact you're autistic, which may have triggered your tantrum or made you upset due to his or her demeanor, then suddenly he or she uses excessive force despite YOU not resisting at all!

I mean what would happen if the judicial system does not side with you at all, despite you having the best lawyer present, as the prosecutor continues his or her antics to pin you as the culprit using autism as a leverage against you! Which I imagine must be scary and infurating when trying to battle the legal system. I think the only option not only for Autistic people, but those who are different is to put a mask on to try and fit in what society deems 'normal' but that can have devastating effects depending on what you have that has no cure, as it seems like you have to pretend to be somebody you're not.
I think the problem stems from how neurological people are presented to the public, other than the propaganda they consume which misrepresents them in general, another issue is that it CAN'T be seen with your naked eye as opposed to physical ailments, plus the statistics can reflect that, but that does not give people the right to discriminate, like can anybody decline colored people or those in a wheelchair inside an establishment? Of course not, so the same applies to people who are born different as well, not only those wheelchair bound or those with croutches.

Isa akong batang laking mahirap. All the kinds of bullying naranasan kona and kahit I am on my adult stage na bakat na bakat padin sa ala ala ko kung ano ang mga napagdaanan ko during my years of schooling.
During my elementary days way back mga 2004-2010, baon ko 2 pesos a day pero hindi pa araw araw may baon. Minsan nag aabot sila mama at papa ng 5 pesos ng monday and that's it for the whole week. I am too innocent in those time kasi Im proud to say na never ako nag cocomplain to my parents regarding that,siguro dahil alam kong wala din naman magbabago if I ask them kasi I know na walang wala din naman talaga sila. Minsan yung mga kaklasmayt ko pa noon tinatawanan ako pag tinutulog ko lang ng recess time namin kahit yung tiyan ko tumutunog sa gutom, while them enjoying their meals and have money on their hands to show off. They don't wanna be friend with me either kasi di ako nakakasabay sa kung anong meron sila kaya ako yung typical na batang PAPASOK sa skul ,UUPO,TAHIMIK at magsasalita lang pag kinakausap. Ang tanging alam ko lang non is disiplinado ako ng mga magulang ko kaya naman never ako nanlimos ng kahit ano or nainvolve sa gulo or na guidance sa skul, if my conflict man non sakin at sa klasmayt ko, umiiwas nalang ako at mananahimik kasi takot akong magkamali eventhough sinasabihan na nila ako "DUWAG" "LAMPA" etc.... One time may pinapa project si teacher sakin that requires money to buy it. Sinabi ko din naman kila mama pero they can't provide so pagpasok ko ng umaga sa skul, sobrang kabado ako kasi lahat sila may maipapasang project and ako lang wala. Then when my name called by our teacher sinabi ko yung totoo but the teacher just say "Baka gusto ako pa magprovide para sayo" sabay tawa. Until then naging hobby na nya akong pagtawanan infront of his co teachers at sa mga students at ako lagi inuutusan taga bunot ng puting buhok nya.🤣 well nakakatawa nalang sya sakin now pag naaalala ko
Fast forward... 2011 Highschool days... I enter highschool like elem na walang wala din. All my things are old, from bag to notebooks, yung lapis ko parang nasa 3 inches nalang ang haba kasi di ko napapalitan. Even my slippers have butas na which is naging reason ng bullying din. Yung ibang klasmayts ko laging kinukwestyon bakit daw ganun di ako mabilhan ng mga magulang ko pero di ko sila sinasagot. Just like elem days, ako yung tipo ng stujanteng tahimik lang sa upuan, kaya ang tingin ng guro namin sakin "MABAIT" pero may mga guro padin na hindi talaga ako nagugustuhan dahil sa bagay na wala ako na meron madalas mga klasmayts ko. Malayo ang skul namin sa mga bahay namin kaya nagbabaon kami ng pang lunch namin. Madalas baon ko araw araw is itlog,pancit canton na isang piraso tapos ginagawa kong pang recess at lunch na yun. Even that thing I was questioned lagi by my klasmayts but I don't answer them. I was so lonely nun kasi wala naman gustong makipagkaibigan sakin, even if may groupings, I was left alone and doing my activity alone. If you guys are wondering how's my marks in school? I was a regular student and never ako na fail sa subject ko kasi yun din habilin ng magulang ko sakin. I was so obedient to my parents even those times na pinag aabsent nila ako para magtrabaho sa bukid at para may baon ako sa school.Then the next day, I will be punished in school for being absent without telling them my reasons. I know how hard my life is kaya nangangako ako sa sarili ko na I have to finish my studies kahit anong mangyari. There are some teachers who love humiliating me in front of many students for the things I have, such meron daw ako shoes na old pero walang socks, butas ang pantalon, and ngilaw na ngilaw ang puting uniporme signs of it being old enough. One thing I am struggling about is yung yellow pad paper, yun kasi gamit namin ng highschool and most of them have it tapos ako pag humihingi ako ayaw din naman ako bigyan, kaya ang ending I'm using notebooks as alternative for it. My teacher would question it again pero same thing, my silence is my response. In those years, teachers are allowed to beat students as sign of disiplina and I was beaten as a punishments for not providing projects and unattended classes dahil sa need ko kumita ng pera para may pambaon. Pag binabalikan ko siya, awang awa ako sa sarili ko. And those people who treated me that bad, I still remember them but I forgave them. Masakit lang pag naaalala ko😭 I just can't imagine na nalagpasan ko siya na ako lang magisa at walang nasandalan even my parents. All those bullying I have received from my society, inako ko lang magisa yun at none from my siblings and parents knows about it.
Fast forward...2015- 2019 College... This one is the most legit na sobrang hirap. Pero bago pa mag umpisa ang semester nun I confront my self na kahit anong mangyari " I have to be a regular students,walang bibitiw at wag na wag babagsak sa kahit anong subjects
1st -2nd year college ko, I tried everything I can, to provide for my own tuition fees and allowances. Yes nagbibigay sila mama at papa pero hindi kasya, minsan 150- 200 lang kaya nila iabot for a week allowance, ang bording house ko laging delayed ang bayad, and my tuition is always on hold kaya laging suki ako ng special exam. Pinasok ko mag work as taga dilig ng halaman and care taker ng isang bar and grill for the night and study in the morning. I have no choice but to do it cause ayokong mag stop sa pagaaral. Kaya naman pag sumasahod ako sa part time ko, binibili ko ng mga sapatos sa shoppee and then I resell it on facebook market online around the city. After my class ng afternoon dun ko sila minimeet up sa city and there I earned money. Tho, of all the efforts and hardships na ginagawa ko still my studies is my top priority. I was so payat sa sobrang pagod, puyat at stress.lagi pa akong nag nose bleeding and I was so worried for my health pero tuloy ang laban. Again, none from my siblings and parents knows about it. I kept it all alone and di din naman sila nag tatanong kasi they thought I am doing fine dahil wala din naman silang narerecieved na reklamo sakin. BULLYING? ofcourse di padin ako nakaligtas jan, I was called "EWW ANG ITIM, MUKHANG MATANDA kasi di nakakapag ahit ng balbas at nakapagpagupit" minsan sasabihin pa nila "Huy kumain ka naman para ka nang kalansay" without knowing my whole story. One time I cried inside the confort room kasi I couldn't help myself na mainggit sa mga classmates ko nun na after class they will be having a talk about san sila mag lulunch if sa Jollibee ba, mcdo or sangyup. Samantalang ako, after class I was so busy meeting people with their orders. Minsan nadadaanan ko pa sila sa fast food having a good time while ako may bitbit na malaking basket puno ng sapatos na idedeliver.🙂 If my mandatory na event sa skul na need attendan, I used to ask people I don't know if may pwede ba akong mahihiraman ng susuotin tapos sasabihin nila try nila hanapan ako pero they then laugh at me afterwards. I feel so ashamed of doing it but I have to. So ayun na nga iniignore ko lang yung mga moment na tinatawanan ako sa looks ko, sa mga bagay na wala ako na meron sila. Basta focused ako sa acads ko nun at sa pagkita ng pera.
During my 3rd yr college. Yung part time kong work nagsara so I was forced to stop working with them na. And so yung pagbebenta ko ng sapatos nalang ginagawa ko. I was so lost that time kasi diko alam ako gagawin ko. Malaking tulong yun sakin lalo na 2yrs nalang kailangan kong tapusin sa pagaaral at mas malaki ang expenses ko na.Isang araw papasok ako ng gate sa skul and there are posters around our campus about scholarships and yung minimum qualified average. I have know idea if abot ba ng average ko dun sa offer ng scholars. so I run towards our registrar to request for a certificate of my grades. My world just stop for a while and I'm in tears kasi naabot nga. 86.04 yung average ko and the asking is 85.0.lang. moving forward, I got the scholarship and it helps me with my tuition fees. Kaya ang pinoproblema ko nalang non is bording house ko. Until meron na namang ibang offered na scholarships sa city so kahit sobrang haba ng pila,tiniis ko kasi I know it will save me. Luckily God is so good to me kaya I got them. That's why sa huling taon na pagaaral bago grumaduate, everything goes well and smooth because of those 3 scholarships. I Gave up selling shoes and focus sa exams nalang until I manage to graduate.....
July 2019.... FINALLY GRADUATED AND A CERTIFIED DEGREE HOLDER OF PSYCHOLOGY....
2024 update about me? I am now in a good path, I took a career that is relevant to my degree and still want exploring more things...

Isa akong batang laking mahirap. All the kinds of bullying naranasan kona and kahit I am on my adult stage na bakat na bakat padin sa ala ala ko kung ano ang mga napagdaanan ko during my years of schooling.
During my elementary days way back mga 2004-2010, baon ko 2 pesos a day pero hindi pa araw araw may baon. Minsan nag aabot sila mama at papa ng 5 pesos ng monday and that's it for the whole week. I am too innocent in those time kasi Im proud to say na never ako nag cocomplain to my parents regarding that,siguro dahil alam kong wala din naman magbabago if I ask them kasi I know na walang wala din naman talaga sila. Minsan yung mga kaklasmayt ko pa noon tinatawanan ako pag tinutulog ko lang ng recess time namin kahit yung tiyan ko tumutunog sa gutom, while them enjoying their meals and have money on their hands to show off. They don't wanna be friend with me either kasi di ako nakakasabay sa kung anong meron sila kaya ako yung typical na batang PAPASOK sa skul ,UUPO,TAHIMIK at magsasalita lang pag kinakausap. Ang tanging alam ko lang non is disiplinado ako ng mga magulang ko kaya naman never ako nanlimos ng kahit ano or nainvolve sa gulo or na guidance sa skul, if my conflict man non sakin at sa klasmayt ko, umiiwas nalang ako at mananahimik kasi takot akong magkamali eventhough sinasabihan na nila ako "DUWAG" "LAMPA" etc.... One time may pinapa project si teacher sakin that requires money to buy it. Sinabi ko din naman kila mama pero they can't provide so pagpasok ko ng umaga sa skul, sobrang kabado ako kasi lahat sila may maipapasang project and ako lang wala. Then when my name called by our teacher sinabi ko yung totoo but the teacher just say "Baka gusto ako pa magprovide para sayo" sabay tawa. Until then naging hobby na nya akong pagtawanan infront of his co teachers at sa mga students at ako lagi inuutusan taga bunot ng puting buhok nya.🤣 well nakakatawa nalang sya sakin now pag naaalala ko
Fast forward... 2011 Highschool days... I enter highschool like elem na walang wala din. All my things are old, from bag to notebooks, yung lapis ko parang nasa 3 inches nalang ang haba kasi di ko napapalitan. Even my slippers have butas na which is naging reason ng bullying din. Yung ibang klasmayts ko laging kinukwestyon bakit daw ganun di ako mabilhan ng mga magulang ko pero di ko sila sinasagot. Just like elem days, ako yung tipo ng stujanteng tahimik lang sa upuan, kaya ang tingin ng guro namin sakin "MABAIT" pero may mga guro padin na hindi talaga ako nagugustuhan dahil sa bagay na wala ako na meron madalas mga klasmayts ko. Malayo ang skul namin sa mga bahay namin kaya nagbabaon kami ng pang lunch namin. Madalas baon ko araw araw is itlog,pancit canton na isang piraso tapos ginagawa kong pang recess at lunch na yun. Even that thing I was questioned lagi by my klasmayts but I don't answer them. I was so lonely nun kasi wala naman gustong makipagkaibigan sakin, even if may groupings, I was left alone and doing my activity alone. If you guys are wondering how's my marks in school? I was a regular student and never ako na fail sa subject ko kasi yun din habilin ng magulang ko sakin. I was so obedient to my parents even those times na pinag aabsent nila ako para magtrabaho sa bukid at para may baon ako sa school.Then the next day, I will be punished in school for being absent without telling them my reasons. I know how hard my life is kaya nangangako ako sa sarili ko na I have to finish my studies kahit anong mangyari. There are some teachers who love humiliating me in front of many students for the things I have, such meron daw ako shoes na old pero walang socks, butas ang pantalon, and ngilaw na ngilaw ang puting uniporme signs of it being old enough. One thing I am struggling about is yung yellow pad paper, yun kasi gamit namin ng highschool and most of them have it tapos ako pag humihingi ako ayaw din naman ako bigyan, kaya ang ending I'm using notebooks as alternative for it. My teacher would question it again pero same thing, my silence is my response. In those years, teachers are allowed to beat students as sign of disiplina and I was beaten as a punishments for not providing projects and unattended classes dahil sa need ko kumita ng pera para may pambaon. Pag binabalikan ko siya, awang awa ako sa sarili ko. And those people who treated me that bad, I still remember them but I forgave them. Masakit lang pag naaalala ko😭 I just can't imagine na nalagpasan ko siya na ako lang magisa at walang nasandalan even my parents. All those bullying I have received from my society, inako ko lang magisa yun at none from my siblings and parents knows about it.
Fast forward...2015- 2019 College... This one is the most legit na sobrang hirap. Pero bago pa mag umpisa ang semester nun I confront my self na kahit anong mangyari " I have to be a regular students,walang bibitiw at wag na wag babagsak sa kahit anong subjects
1st -2nd year college ko, I tried everything I can, to provide for my own tuition fees and allowances. Yes nagbibigay sila mama at papa pero hindi kasya, minsan 150- 200 lang kaya nila iabot for a week allowance, ang bording house ko laging delayed ang bayad, and my tuition is always on hold kaya laging suki ako ng special exam. Pinasok ko mag work as taga dilig ng halaman and care taker ng isang bar and grill for the night and study in the morning. I have no choice but to do it cause ayokong mag stop sa pagaaral. Kaya naman pag sumasahod ako sa part time ko, binibili ko ng mga sapatos sa shoppee and then I resell it on facebook market online around the city. After my class ng afternoon dun ko sila minimeet up sa city and there I earned money. Tho, of all the efforts and hardships na ginagawa ko still my studies is my top priority. I was so payat sa sobrang pagod, puyat at stress.lagi pa akong nag nose bleeding and I was so worried for my health pero tuloy ang laban. Again, none from my siblings and parents knows about it. I kept it all alone and di din naman sila nag tatanong kasi they thought I am doing fine dahil wala din naman silang narerecieved na reklamo sakin. BULLYING? ofcourse di padin ako nakaligtas jan, I was called "EWW ANG ITIM, MUKHANG MATANDA kasi di nakakapag ahit ng balbas at nakapagpagupit" minsan sasabihin pa nila "Huy kumain ka naman para ka nang kalansay" without knowing my whole story. One time I cried inside the confort room kasi I couldn't help myself na mainggit sa mga classmates ko nun na after class they will be having a talk about san sila mag lulunch if sa Jollibee ba, mcdo or sangyup. Samantalang ako, after class I was so busy meeting people with their orders. Minsan nadadaanan ko pa sila sa fast food having a good time while ako may bitbit na malaking basket puno ng sapatos na idedeliver.🙂 If my mandatory na event sa skul na need attendan, I used to ask people I don't know if may pwede ba akong mahihiraman ng susuotin tapos sasabihin nila try nila hanapan ako pero they then laugh at me afterwards. I feel so ashamed of doing it but I have to. So ayun na nga iniignore ko lang yung mga moment na tinatawanan ako sa looks ko, sa mga bagay na wala ako na meron sila. Basta focused ako sa acads ko nun at sa pagkita ng pera.
During my 3rd yr college. Yung part time kong work nagsara so I was forced to stop working with them na. And so yung pagbebenta ko ng sapatos nalang ginagawa ko. I was so lost that time kasi diko alam ako gagawin ko. Malaking tulong yun sakin lalo na 2yrs nalang kailangan kong tapusin sa pagaaral at mas malaki ang expenses ko na.Isang araw papasok ako ng gate sa skul and there are posters around our campus about scholarships and yung minimum qualified average. I have know idea if abot ba ng average ko dun sa offer ng scholars. so I run towards our registrar to request for a certificate of my grades. My world just stop for a while and I'm in tears kasi naabot nga. 86.04 yung average ko and the asking is 85.0.lang. moving forward, I got the scholarship and it helps me with my tuition fees. Kaya ang pinoproblema ko nalang non is bording house ko. Until meron na namang ibang offered na scholarships sa city so kahit sobrang haba ng pila,tiniis ko kasi I know it will save me. Luckily God is so good to me kaya I got them. That's why sa huling taon na pagaaral bago grumaduate, everything goes well and smooth because of those 3 scholarships. I Gave up selling shoes and focus sa exams nalang until I manage to graduate.....
July 2019.... FINALLY GRADUATED AND A CERTIFIED DEGREE HOLDER OF PSYCHOLOGY....
2024 update about me? I am now in a good path, I took a career that is relevant to my degree and still want exploring more things...

Isa akong batang laking mahirap. All the kinds of bullying naranasan kona and kahit I am on my adult stage na bakat na bakat padin sa ala ala ko kung ano ang mga napagdaanan ko during my years of schooling.
During my elementary days way back mga 2004-2010, baon ko 2 pesos a day pero hindi pa araw araw may baon. Minsan nag aabot sila mama at papa ng 5 pesos ng monday and that's it for the whole week. I am too innocent in those time kasi Im proud to say na never ako nag cocomplain to my parents regarding that,siguro dahil alam kong wala din naman magbabago if I ask them kasi I know na walang wala din naman talaga sila. Minsan yung mga kaklasmayt ko pa noon tinatawanan ako pag tinutulog ko lang ng recess time namin kahit yung tiyan ko tumutunog sa gutom, while them enjoying their meals and have money on their hands to show off. They don't wanna be friend with me either kasi di ako nakakasabay sa kung anong meron sila kaya ako yung typical na batang PAPASOK sa skul ,UUPO,TAHIMIK at magsasalita lang pag kinakausap. Ang tanging alam ko lang non is disiplinado ako ng mga magulang ko kaya naman never ako nanlimos ng kahit ano or nainvolve sa gulo or na guidance sa skul, if my conflict man non sakin at sa klasmayt ko, umiiwas nalang ako at mananahimik kasi takot akong magkamali eventhough sinasabihan na nila ako "DUWAG" "LAMPA" etc.... One time may pinapa project si teacher sakin that requires money to buy it. Sinabi ko din naman kila mama pero they can't provide so pagpasok ko ng umaga sa skul, sobrang kabado ako kasi lahat sila may maipapasang project and ako lang wala. Then when my name called by our teacher sinabi ko yung totoo but the teacher just say "Baka gusto ako pa magprovide para sayo" sabay tawa. Until then naging hobby na nya akong pagtawanan infront of his co teachers at sa mga students at ako lagi inuutusan taga bunot ng puting buhok nya.🤣 well nakakatawa nalang sya sakin now pag naaalala ko
Fast forward... 2011 Highschool days... I enter highschool like elem na walang wala din. All my things are old, from bag to notebooks, yung lapis ko parang nasa 3 inches nalang ang haba kasi di ko napapalitan. Even my slippers have butas na which is naging reason ng bullying din. Yung ibang klasmayts ko laging kinukwestyon bakit daw ganun di ako mabilhan ng mga magulang ko pero di ko sila sinasagot. Just like elem days, ako yung tipo ng stujanteng tahimik lang sa upuan, kaya ang tingin ng guro namin sakin "MABAIT" pero may mga guro padin na hindi talaga ako nagugustuhan dahil sa bagay na wala ako na meron madalas mga klasmayts ko. Malayo ang skul namin sa mga bahay namin kaya nagbabaon kami ng pang lunch namin. Madalas baon ko araw araw is itlog,pancit canton na isang piraso tapos ginagawa kong pang recess at lunch na yun. Even that thing I was questioned lagi by my klasmayts but I don't answer them. I was so lonely nun kasi wala naman gustong makipagkaibigan sakin, even if may groupings, I was left alone and doing my activity alone. If you guys are wondering how's my marks in school? I was a regular student and never ako na fail sa subject ko kasi yun din habilin ng magulang ko sakin. I was so obedient to my parents even those times na pinag aabsent nila ako para magtrabaho sa bukid at para may baon ako sa school.Then the next day, I will be punished in school for being absent without telling them my reasons. I know how hard my life is kaya nangangako ako sa sarili ko na I have to finish my studies kahit anong mangyari. There are some teachers who love humiliating me in front of many students for the things I have, such meron daw ako shoes na old pero walang socks, butas ang pantalon, and ngilaw na ngilaw ang puting uniporme signs of it being old enough. One thing I am struggling about is yung yellow pad paper, yun kasi gamit namin ng highschool and most of them have it tapos ako pag humihingi ako ayaw din naman ako bigyan, kaya ang ending I'm using notebooks as alternative for it. My teacher would question it again pero same thing, my silence is my response. In those years, teachers are allowed to beat students as sign of disiplina and I was beaten as a punishments for not providing projects and unattended classes dahil sa need ko kumita ng pera para may pambaon. Pag binabalikan ko siya, awang awa ako sa sarili ko. And those people who treated me that bad, I still remember them but I forgave them. Masakit lang pag naaalala ko😭 I just can't imagine na nalagpasan ko siya na ako lang magisa at walang nasandalan even my parents. All those bullying I have received from my society, inako ko lang magisa yun at none from my siblings and parents knows about it.
Fast forward...2015- 2019 College... This one is the most legit na sobrang hirap. Pero bago pa mag umpisa ang semester nun I confront my self na kahit anong mangyari " I have to be a regular students,walang bibitiw at wag na wag babagsak sa kahit anong subjects
1st -2nd year college ko, I tried everything I can, to provide for my own tuition fees and allowances. Yes nagbibigay sila mama at papa pero hindi kasya, minsan 150- 200 lang kaya nila iabot for a week allowance, ang bording house ko laging delayed ang bayad, and my tuition is always on hold kaya laging suki ako ng special exam. Pinasok ko mag work as taga dilig ng halaman and care taker ng isang bar and grill for the night and study in the morning. I have no choice but to do it cause ayokong mag stop sa pagaaral. Kaya naman pag sumasahod ako sa part time ko, binibili ko ng mga sapatos sa shoppee and then I resell it on facebook market online around the city. After my class ng afternoon dun ko sila minimeet up sa city and there I earned money. Tho, of all the efforts and hardships na ginagawa ko still my studies is my top priority. I was so payat sa sobrang pagod, puyat at stress.lagi pa akong nag nose bleeding and I was so worried for my health pero tuloy ang laban. Again, none from my siblings and parents knows about it. I kept it all alone and di din naman sila nag tatanong kasi they thought I am doing fine dahil wala din naman silang narerecieved na reklamo sakin. BULLYING? ofcourse di padin ako nakaligtas jan, I was called "EWW ANG ITIM, MUKHANG MATANDA kasi di nakakapag ahit ng balbas at nakapagpagupit" minsan sasabihin pa nila "Huy kumain ka naman para ka nang kalansay" without knowing my whole story. One time I cried inside the confort room kasi I couldn't help myself na mainggit sa mga classmates ko nun na after class they will be having a talk about san sila mag lulunch if sa Jollibee ba, mcdo or sangyup. Samantalang ako, after class I was so busy meeting people with their orders. Minsan nadadaanan ko pa sila sa fast food having a good time while ako may bitbit na malaking basket puno ng sapatos na idedeliver.🙂 If my mandatory na event sa skul na need attendan, I used to ask people I don't know if may pwede ba akong mahihiraman ng susuotin tapos sasabihin nila try nila hanapan ako pero they then laugh at me afterwards. I feel so ashamed of doing it but I have to. So ayun na nga iniignore ko lang yung mga moment na tinatawanan ako sa looks ko, sa mga bagay na wala ako na meron sila. Basta focused ako sa acads ko nun at sa pagkita ng pera.
During my 3rd yr college. Yung part time kong work nagsara so I was forced to stop working with them na. And so yung pagbebenta ko ng sapatos nalang ginagawa ko. I was so lost that time kasi diko alam ako gagawin ko. Malaking tulong yun sakin lalo na 2yrs nalang kailangan kong tapusin sa pagaaral at mas malaki ang expenses ko na.Isang araw papasok ako ng gate sa skul and there are posters around our campus about scholarships and yung minimum qualified average. I have know idea if abot ba ng average ko dun sa offer ng scholars. so I run towards our registrar to request for a certificate of my grades. My world just stop for a while and I'm in tears kasi naabot nga. 86.04 yung average ko and the asking is 85.0.lang. moving forward, I got the scholarship and it helps me with my tuition fees. Kaya ang pinoproblema ko nalang non is bording house ko. Until meron na namang ibang offered na scholarships sa city so kahit sobrang haba ng pila,tiniis ko kasi I know it will save me. Luckily God is so good to me kaya I got them. That's why sa huling taon na pagaaral bago grumaduate, everything goes well and smooth because of those 3 scholarships. I Gave up selling shoes and focus sa exams nalang until I manage to graduate.....
July 2019.... FINALLY GRADUATED AND A CERTIFIED DEGREE HOLDER OF PSYCHOLOGY....
2024 update about me? I am now in a good path, I took a career that is relevant to my degree and still want exploring more things...

Isa akong batang laking mahirap. All the kinds of bullying naranasan kona and kahit I am on my adult stage na bakat na bakat padin sa ala ala ko kung ano ang mga napagdaanan ko during my years of schooling.
During my elementary days way back mga 2004-2010, baon ko 2 pesos a day pero hindi pa araw araw may baon. Minsan nag aabot sila mama at papa ng 5 pesos ng monday and that's it for the whole week. I am too innocent in those time kasi Im proud to say na never ako nag cocomplain to my parents regarding that,siguro dahil alam kong wala din naman magbabago if I ask them kasi I know na walang wala din naman talaga sila. Minsan yung mga kaklasmayt ko pa noon tinatawanan ako pag tinutulog ko lang ng recess time namin kahit yung tiyan ko tumutunog sa gutom, while them enjoying their meals and have money on their hands to show off. They don't wanna be friend with me either kasi di ako nakakasabay sa kung anong meron sila kaya ako yung typical na batang PAPASOK sa skul ,UUPO,TAHIMIK at magsasalita lang pag kinakausap. Ang tanging alam ko lang non is disiplinado ako ng mga magulang ko kaya naman never ako nanlimos ng kahit ano or nainvolve sa gulo or na guidance sa skul, if my conflict man non sakin at sa klasmayt ko, umiiwas nalang ako at mananahimik kasi takot akong magkamali eventhough sinasabihan na nila ako "DUWAG" "LAMPA" etc.... One time may pinapa project si teacher sakin that requires money to buy it. Sinabi ko din naman kila mama pero they can't provide so pagpasok ko ng umaga sa skul, sobrang kabado ako kasi lahat sila may maipapasang project and ako lang wala. Then when my name called by our teacher sinabi ko yung totoo but the teacher just say "Baka gusto ako pa magprovide para sayo" sabay tawa. Until then naging hobby na nya akong pagtawanan infront of his co teachers at sa mga students at ako lagi inuutusan taga bunot ng puting buhok nya.🤣 well nakakatawa nalang sya sakin now pag naaalala ko
Fast forward... 2011 Highschool days... I enter highschool like elem na walang wala din. All my things are old, from bag to notebooks, yung lapis ko parang nasa 3 inches nalang ang haba kasi di ko napapalitan. Even my slippers have butas na which is naging reason ng bullying din. Yung ibang klasmayts ko laging kinukwestyon bakit daw ganun di ako mabilhan ng mga magulang ko pero di ko sila sinasagot. Just like elem days, ako yung tipo ng stujanteng tahimik lang sa upuan, kaya ang tingin ng guro namin sakin "MABAIT" pero may mga guro padin na hindi talaga ako nagugustuhan dahil sa bagay na wala ako na meron madalas mga klasmayts ko. Malayo ang skul namin sa mga bahay namin kaya nagbabaon kami ng pang lunch namin. Madalas baon ko araw araw is itlog,pancit canton na isang piraso tapos ginagawa kong pang recess at lunch na yun. Even that thing I was questioned lagi by my klasmayts but I don't answer them. I was so lonely nun kasi wala naman gustong makipagkaibigan sakin, even if may groupings, I was left alone and doing my activity alone. If you guys are wondering how's my marks in school? I was a regular student and never ako na fail sa subject ko kasi yun din habilin ng magulang ko sakin. I was so obedient to my parents even those times na pinag aabsent nila ako para magtrabaho sa bukid at para may baon ako sa school.Then the next day, I will be punished in school for being absent without telling them my reasons. I know how hard my life is kaya nangangako ako sa sarili ko na I have to finish my studies kahit anong mangyari. There are some teachers who love humiliating me in front of many students for the things I have, such meron daw ako shoes na old pero walang socks, butas ang pantalon, and ngilaw na ngilaw ang puting uniporme signs of it being old enough. One thing I am struggling about is yung yellow pad paper, yun kasi gamit namin ng highschool and most of them have it tapos ako pag humihingi ako ayaw din naman ako bigyan, kaya ang ending I'm using notebooks as alternative for it. My teacher would question it again pero same thing, my silence is my response. In those years, teachers are allowed to beat students as sign of disiplina and I was beaten as a punishments for not providing projects and unattended classes dahil sa need ko kumita ng pera para may pambaon. Pag binabalikan ko siya, awang awa ako sa sarili ko. And those people who treated me that bad, I still remember them but I forgave them. Masakit lang pag naaalala ko😭 I just can't imagine na nalagpasan ko siya na ako lang magisa at walang nasandalan even my parents. All those bullying I have received from my society, inako ko lang magisa yun at none from my siblings and parents knows about it.
Fast forward...2015- 2019 College... This one is the most legit na sobrang hirap. Pero bago pa mag umpisa ang semester nun I confront my self na kahit anong mangyari " I have to be a regular students,walang bibitiw at wag na wag babagsak sa kahit anong subjects
1st -2nd year college ko, I tried everything I can, to provide for my own tuition fees and allowances. Yes nagbibigay sila mama at papa pero hindi kasya, minsan 150- 200 lang kaya nila iabot for a week allowance, ang bording house ko laging delayed ang bayad, and my tuition is always on hold kaya laging suki ako ng special exam. Pinasok ko mag work as taga dilig ng halaman and care taker ng isang bar and grill for the night and study in the morning. I have no choice but to do it cause ayokong mag stop sa pagaaral. Kaya naman pag sumasahod ako sa part time ko, binibili ko ng mga sapatos sa shoppee and then I resell it on facebook market online around the city. After my class ng afternoon dun ko sila minimeet up sa city and there I earned money. Tho, of all the efforts and hardships na ginagawa ko still my studies is my top priority. I was so payat sa sobrang pagod, puyat at stress.lagi pa akong nag nose bleeding and I was so worried for my health pero tuloy ang laban. Again, none from my siblings and parents knows about it. I kept it all alone and di din naman sila nag tatanong kasi they thought I am doing fine dahil wala din naman silang narerecieved na reklamo sakin. BULLYING? ofcourse di padin ako nakaligtas jan, I was called "EWW ANG ITIM, MUKHANG MATANDA kasi di nakakapag ahit ng balbas at nakapagpagupit" minsan sasabihin pa nila "Huy kumain ka naman para ka nang kalansay" without knowing my whole story. One time I cried inside the confort room kasi I couldn't help myself na mainggit sa mga classmates ko nun na after class they will be having a talk about san sila mag lulunch if sa Jollibee ba, mcdo or sangyup. Samantalang ako, after class I was so busy meeting people with their orders. Minsan nadadaanan ko pa sila sa fast food having a good time while ako may bitbit na malaking basket puno ng sapatos na idedeliver.🙂 If my mandatory na event sa skul na need attendan, I used to ask people I don't know if may pwede ba akong mahihiraman ng susuotin tapos sasabihin nila try nila hanapan ako pero they then laugh at me afterwards. I feel so ashamed of doing it but I have to. So ayun na nga iniignore ko lang yung mga moment na tinatawanan ako sa looks ko, sa mga bagay na wala ako na meron sila. Basta focused ako sa acads ko nun at sa pagkita ng pera.
During my 3rd yr college. Yung part time kong work nagsara so I was forced to stop working with them na. And so yung pagbebenta ko ng sapatos nalang ginagawa ko. I was so lost that time kasi diko alam ako gagawin ko. Malaking tulong yun sakin lalo na 2yrs nalang kailangan kong tapusin sa pagaaral at mas malaki ang expenses ko na.Isang araw papasok ako ng gate sa skul and there are posters around our campus about scholarships and yung minimum qualified average. I have know idea if abot ba ng average ko dun sa offer ng scholars. so I run towards our registrar to request for a certificate of my grades. My world just stop for a while and I'm in tears kasi naabot nga. 86.04 yung average ko and the asking is 85.0.lang. moving forward, I got the scholarship and it helps me with my tuition fees. Kaya ang pinoproblema ko nalang non is bording house ko. Until meron na namang ibang offered na scholarships sa city so kahit sobrang haba ng pila,tiniis ko kasi I know it will save me. Luckily God is so good to me kaya I got them. That's why sa huling taon na pagaaral bago grumaduate, everything goes well and smooth because of those 3 scholarships. I Gave up selling shoes and focus sa exams nalang until I manage to graduate.....
July 2019.... FINALLY GRADUATED AND A CERTIFIED DEGREE HOLDER OF PSYCHOLOGY....
2024 update about me? I am now in a good path, I took a career that is relevant to my degree and still want exploring more things...

I'm 178 hours in by now, finished the game once playing Archer with a pretty normal party composition and getting the normal ending. After that I chose to hit New Game and start again, only playing FighteWarrior, will try to get the true endind and I only have 2 pawns, my main one being an Archer and a Mage for support. Right now I'm using Warfarer with all Fighter Skills and weapons and Thief armor for fashion and for making it a little harder. The thief armor uses Fell Lord Bones for upgrading and so I went hunting for those in Batahl for a couple of hours today and at some point in the road I heard a Hobgoblin/Knacker sounding a War Horn, and that is where it got crazy.
There were 2 big Knackers with shields and banners and 5 more of the smaller ones acompanied by 2 armored cyclops to which I imediatly tought: "Nah, I'd win!"
So the fight started and I focused on getting aggro and hiting Fighter's counter skill on the knackers while avoiding the 2 Cyclops and all was well until there were only the 2 cyclops and 1 knacker. Fight was actualy kinda easy and then I heard a screech form the skies... Yep, a Griffin joined our little mosh pit. Somehow I managed to down the cyclops and the knacker before puting up a fight with the Griffin and now that it was alone it was only a matter of time until I downed it too. Or so I tought because the damn thing started flying away while I was on top of it, carrying me to the other side of Batahl and leaving me there on top of a small mountain.
I jumped down and with the shield, managed to survive the fall only to be attacked by a Drake right as I hit the ground. I'm a level 45 Fighter, Drakes are no problem anymore, the only bad part was my gray health, in time I defeated the Drake too and decided to travel back to try and find the damn bones for my armor and in the middle of the way THE DAMN GRIFFIN CAME BACK while I was clearing some more knackers and saurians on the road, we started another mosh pit of death and I finally got rid of the bird.
My HP bar is mostly gray now, I didn't bring any ferrystones and I'm far away from any form of civilization. I don't think I've ever been so harassed by an enemy in a videogame.
I love this game so much.
​
P.S: My storytelling abilities are way better in portuguese.

Isa akong batang laking mahirap. All the kinds of bullying naranasan kona and kahit I am on my adult stage na bakat na bakat padin sa ala ala ko kung ano ang mga napagdaanan ko during my years of schooling.
During my elementary days way back mga 2004-2010, baon ko 2 pesos a day pero hindi pa araw araw may baon. Minsan nag aabot sila mama at papa ng 5 pesos ng monday and that's it for the whole week. I am too innocent in those time kasi Im proud to say na never ako nag cocomplain to my parents regarding that,siguro dahil alam kong wala din naman magbabago if I ask them kasi I know na walang wala din naman talaga sila. Minsan yung mga kaklasmayt ko pa noon tinatawanan ako pag tinutulog ko lang ng recess time namin kahit yung tiyan ko tumutunog sa gutom, while them enjoying their meals and have money on their hands to show off. They don't wanna be friend with me either kasi di ako nakakasabay sa kung anong meron sila kaya ako yung typical na batang PAPASOK sa skul ,UUPO,TAHIMIK at magsasalita lang pag kinakausap. Ang tanging alam ko lang non is disiplinado ako ng mga magulang ko kaya naman never ako nanlimos ng kahit ano or nainvolve sa gulo or na guidance sa skul, if my conflict man non sakin at sa klasmayt ko, umiiwas nalang ako at mananahimik kasi takot akong magkamali eventhough sinasabihan na nila ako "DUWAG" "LAMPA" etc.... One time may pinapa project si teacher sakin that requires money to buy it. Sinabi ko din naman kila mama pero they can't provide so pagpasok ko ng umaga sa skul, sobrang kabado ako kasi lahat sila may maipapasang project and ako lang wala. Then when my name called by our teacher sinabi ko yung totoo but the teacher just say "Baka gusto ako pa magprovide para sayo" sabay tawa. Until then naging hobby na nya akong pagtawanan infront of his co teachers at sa mga students at ako lagi inuutusan taga bunot ng puting buhok nya.🤣 well nakakatawa nalang sya sakin now pag naaalala ko
Fast forward... 2011 Highschool days... I enter highschool like elem na walang wala din. All my things are old, from bag to notebooks, yung lapis ko parang nasa 3 inches nalang ang haba kasi di ko napapalitan. Even my slippers have butas na which is naging reason ng bullying din. Yung ibang klasmayts ko laging kinukwestyon bakit daw ganun di ako mabilhan ng mga magulang ko pero di ko sila sinasagot. Just like elem days, ako yung tipo ng stujanteng tahimik lang sa upuan, kaya ang tingin ng guro namin sakin "MABAIT" pero may mga guro padin na hindi talaga ako nagugustuhan dahil sa bagay na wala ako na meron madalas mga klasmayts ko. Malayo ang skul namin sa mga bahay namin kaya nagbabaon kami ng pang lunch namin. Madalas baon ko araw araw is itlog,pancit canton na isang piraso tapos ginagawa kong pang recess at lunch na yun. Even that thing I was questioned lagi by my klasmayts but I don't answer them. I was so lonely nun kasi wala naman gustong makipagkaibigan sakin, even if may groupings, I was left alone and doing my activity alone. If you guys are wondering how's my marks in school? I was a regular student and never ako na fail sa subject ko kasi yun din habilin ng magulang ko sakin. I was so obedient to my parents even those times na pinag aabsent nila ako para magtrabaho sa bukid at para may baon ako sa school.Then the next day, I will be punished in school for being absent without telling them my reasons. I know how hard my life is kaya nangangako ako sa sarili ko na I have to finish my studies kahit anong mangyari. There are some teachers who love humiliating me in front of many students for the things I have, such meron daw ako shoes na old pero walang socks, butas ang pantalon, and ngilaw na ngilaw ang puting uniporme signs of it being old enough. One thing I am struggling about is yung yellow pad paper, yun kasi gamit namin ng highschool and most of them have it tapos ako pag humihingi ako ayaw din naman ako bigyan, kaya ang ending I'm using notebooks as alternative for it. My teacher would question it again pero same thing, my silence is my response. In those years, teachers are allowed to beat students as sign of disiplina and I was beaten as a punishments for not providing projects and unattended classes dahil sa need ko kumita ng pera para may pambaon. Pag binabalikan ko siya, awang awa ako sa sarili ko. And those people who treated me that bad, I still remember them but I forgave them. Masakit lang pag naaalala ko😭 I just can't imagine na nalagpasan ko siya na ako lang magisa at walang nasandalan even my parents. All those bullying I have received from my society, inako ko lang magisa yun at none from my siblings and parents knows about it.
Fast forward...2015- 2019 College... This one is the most legit na sobrang hirap. Pero bago pa mag umpisa ang semester nun I confront my self na kahit anong mangyari " I have to be a regular students,walang bibitiw at wag na wag babagsak sa kahit anong subjects
1st -2nd year college ko, I tried everything I can, to provide for my own tuition fees and allowances. Yes nagbibigay sila mama at papa pero hindi kasya, minsan 150- 200 lang kaya nila iabot for a week allowance, ang bording house ko laging delayed ang bayad, and my tuition is always on hold kaya laging suki ako ng special exam. Pinasok ko mag work as taga dilig ng halaman and care taker ng isang bar and grill for the night and study in the morning. I have no choice but to do it cause ayokong mag stop sa pagaaral. Kaya naman pag sumasahod ako sa part time ko, binibili ko ng mga sapatos sa shoppee and then I resell it on facebook market online around the city. After my class ng afternoon dun ko sila minimeet up sa city and there I earned money. Tho, of all the efforts and hardships na ginagawa ko still my studies is my top priority. I was so payat sa sobrang pagod, puyat at stress.lagi pa akong nag nose bleeding and I was so worried for my health pero tuloy ang laban. Again, none from my siblings and parents knows about it. I kept it all alone and di din naman sila nag tatanong kasi they thought I am doing fine dahil wala din naman silang narerecieved na reklamo sakin. BULLYING? ofcourse di padin ako nakaligtas jan, I was called "EWW ANG ITIM, MUKHANG MATANDA kasi di nakakapag ahit ng balbas at nakapagpagupit" minsan sasabihin pa nila "Huy kumain ka naman para ka nang kalansay" without knowing my whole story. One time I cried inside the confort room kasi I couldn't help myself na mainggit sa mga classmates ko nun na after class they will be having a talk about san sila mag lulunch if sa Jollibee ba, mcdo or sangyup. Samantalang ako, after class I was so busy meeting people with their orders. Minsan nadadaanan ko pa sila sa fast food having a good time while ako may bitbit na malaking basket puno ng sapatos na idedeliver.🙂 If my mandatory na event sa skul na need attendan, I used to ask people I don't know if may pwede ba akong mahihiraman ng susuotin tapos sasabihin nila try nila hanapan ako pero they then laugh at me afterwards. I feel so ashamed of doing it but I have to. So ayun na nga iniignore ko lang yung mga moment na tinatawanan ako sa looks ko, sa mga bagay na wala ako na meron sila. Basta focused ako sa acads ko nun at sa pagkita ng pera.
During my 3rd yr college. Yung part time kong work nagsara so I was forced to stop working with them na. And so yung pagbebenta ko ng sapatos nalang ginagawa ko. I was so lost that time kasi diko alam ako gagawin ko. Malaking tulong yun sakin lalo na 2yrs nalang kailangan kong tapusin sa pagaaral at mas malaki ang expenses ko na.Isang araw papasok ako ng gate sa skul and there are posters around our campus about scholarships and yung minimum qualified average. I have know idea if abot ba ng average ko dun sa offer ng scholars. so I run towards our registrar to request for a certificate of my grades. My world just stop for a while and I'm in tears kasi naabot nga. 86.04 yung average ko and the asking is 85.0.lang. moving forward, I got the scholarship and it helps me with my tuition fees. Kaya ang pinoproblema ko nalang non is bording house ko. Until meron na namang ibang offered na scholarships sa city so kahit sobrang haba ng pila,tiniis ko kasi I know it will save me. Luckily God is so good to me kaya I got them. That's why sa huling taon na pagaaral bago grumaduate, everything goes well and smooth because of those 3 scholarships. I Gave up selling shoes and focus sa exams nalang until I manage to graduate.....
July 2019.... FINALLY GRADUATED AND A CERTIFIED DEGREE HOLDER OF PSYCHOLOGY....
2024 update about me? I am now in a good path, I took a career that is relevant to my degree and still want exploring more things...

Mid-40’s here. Never had knee issues in my life. Always been relatively fit and walk an average 3-4 miles per day. Started strength training about three years ago, incorporating heavy ass-to-grass low bar squats twice a week. Nothing insane. No ego lifting, and progressing slowly. Was up to 200lbs three weeks ago, at 174lbs bodyweight.
So, went on a week long vacay recently, didn’t lift the whole time but did some swimming. Came back and attended a seated concert. As I went into my row to take my seat I suddenly felt a sharp pain on the medial side of my right knee, bad enough I spilled half my drink on myself. I went back out into the lobby of the venue to clean up and try to do a little stretching and couldn’t squat below parallel without serious pain.
Haven’t done any leg work in the gym since then (no squating) and felt like things were healing up as I could walk and climb up and down stairs normally. Now, just over a week later, puting weight on that same knee getting out of bed this morning I felt the same sharp pain in the same spot. Can also hear clicking/popping in that knee when extending and curling my leg. Have been googling this all day and suspect I may have an injured medial meniscus.
However, I can still walk and go up/down stairs without much issue, no swelling or mobility problems (apart from squating) but am really worried about long term problems. Should I see a doc immediately, or just kinda rest that knee for a few weeks and see where I’m at? I keep hearing/reading that this may not heal on its own.

Isa akong batang laking mahirap. All the kinds of bullying naranasan kona and kahit I am on my adult stage na bakat na bakat padin sa ala ala ko kung ano ang mga napagdaanan ko during my years of schooling.
During my elementary days way back mga 2004-2010, baon ko 2 pesos a day pero hindi pa araw araw may baon. Minsan nag aabot sila mama at papa ng 5 pesos ng monday and that's it for the whole week. I am too innocent in those time kasi Im proud to say na never ako nag cocomplain to my parents regarding that,siguro dahil alam kong wala din naman magbabago if I ask them kasi I know na walang wala din naman talaga sila. Minsan yung mga kaklasmayt ko pa noon tinatawanan ako pag tinutulog ko lang ng recess time namin kahit yung tiyan ko tumutunog sa gutom, while them enjoying their meals and have money on their hands to show off. They don't wanna be friend with me either kasi di ako nakakasabay sa kung anong meron sila kaya ako yung typical na batang PAPASOK sa skul ,UUPO,TAHIMIK at magsasalita lang pag kinakausap. Ang tanging alam ko lang non is disiplinado ako ng mga magulang ko kaya naman never ako nanlimos ng kahit ano or nainvolve sa gulo or na guidance sa skul, if my conflict man non sakin at sa klasmayt ko, umiiwas nalang ako at mananahimik kasi takot akong magkamali eventhough sinasabihan na nila ako "DUWAG" "LAMPA" etc.... One time may pinapa project si teacher sakin that requires money to buy it. Sinabi ko din naman kila mama pero they can't provide so pagpasok ko ng umaga sa skul, sobrang kabado ako kasi lahat sila may maipapasang project and ako lang wala. Then when my name called by our teacher sinabi ko yung totoo but the teacher just say "Baka gusto ako pa magprovide para sayo" sabay tawa. Until then naging hobby na nya akong pagtawanan infront of his co teachers at sa mga students at ako lagi inuutusan taga bunot ng puting buhok nya.🤣 well nakakatawa nalang sya sakin now pag naaalala ko
Fast forward... 2011 Highschool days... I enter highschool like elem na walang wala din. All my things are old, from bag to notebooks, yung lapis ko parang nasa 3 inches nalang ang haba kasi di ko napapalitan. Even my slippers have butas na which is naging reason ng bullying din. Yung ibang klasmayts ko laging kinukwestyon bakit daw ganun di ako mabilhan ng mga magulang ko pero di ko sila sinasagot. Just like elem days, ako yung tipo ng stujanteng tahimik lang sa upuan, kaya ang tingin ng guro namin sakin "MABAIT" pero may mga guro padin na hindi talaga ako nagugustuhan dahil sa bagay na wala ako na meron madalas mga klasmayts ko. Malayo ang skul namin sa mga bahay namin kaya nagbabaon kami ng pang lunch namin. Madalas baon ko araw araw is itlog,pancit canton na isang piraso tapos ginagawa kong pang recess at lunch na yun. Even that thing I was questioned lagi by my klasmayts but I don't answer them. I was so lonely nun kasi wala naman gustong makipagkaibigan sakin, even if may groupings, I was left alone and doing my activity alone. If you guys are wondering how's my marks in school? I was a regular student and never ako na fail sa subject ko kasi yun din habilin ng magulang ko sakin. I was so obedient to my parents even those times na pinag aabsent nila ako para magtrabaho sa bukid at para may baon ako sa school.Then the next day, I will be punished in school for being absent without telling them my reasons. I know how hard my life is kaya nangangako ako sa sarili ko na I have to finish my studies kahit anong mangyari. There are some teachers who love humiliating me in front of many students for the things I have, such meron daw ako shoes na old pero walang socks, butas ang pantalon, and ngilaw na ngilaw ang puting uniporme signs of it being old enough. One thing I am struggling about is yung yellow pad paper, yun kasi gamit namin ng highschool and most of them have it tapos ako pag humihingi ako ayaw din naman ako bigyan, kaya ang ending I'm using notebooks as alternative for it. My teacher would question it again pero same thing, my silence is my response. In those years, teachers are allowed to beat students as sign of disiplina and I was beaten as a punishments for not providing projects and unattended classes dahil sa need ko kumita ng pera para may pambaon. Pag binabalikan ko siya, awang awa ako sa sarili ko. And those people who treated me that bad, I still remember them but I forgave them. Masakit lang pag naaalala ko😭 I just can't imagine na nalagpasan ko siya na ako lang magisa at walang nasandalan even my parents. All those bullying I have received from my society, inako ko lang magisa yun at none from my siblings and parents knows about it.
Fast forward...2015- 2019 College... This one is the most legit na sobrang hirap. Pero bago pa mag umpisa ang semester nun I confront my self na kahit anong mangyari " I have to be a regular students,walang bibitiw at wag na wag babagsak sa kahit anong subjects
1st -2nd year college ko, I tried everything I can, to provide for my own tuition fees and allowances. Yes nagbibigay sila mama at papa pero hindi kasya, minsan 150- 200 lang kaya nila iabot for a week allowance, ang bording house ko laging delayed ang bayad, and my tuition is always on hold kaya laging suki ako ng special exam. Pinasok ko mag work as taga dilig ng halaman and care taker ng isang bar and grill for the night and study in the morning. I have no choice but to do it cause ayokong mag stop sa pagaaral. Kaya naman pag sumasahod ako sa part time ko, binibili ko ng mga sapatos sa shoppee and then I resell it on facebook market online around the city. After my class ng afternoon dun ko sila minimeet up sa city and there I earned money. Tho, of all the efforts and hardships na ginagawa ko still my studies is my top priority. I was so payat sa sobrang pagod, puyat at stress.lagi pa akong nag nose bleeding and I was so worried for my health pero tuloy ang laban. Again, none from my siblings and parents knows about it. I kept it all alone and di din naman sila nag tatanong kasi they thought I am doing fine dahil wala din naman silang narerecieved na reklamo sakin. BULLYING? ofcourse di padin ako nakaligtas jan, I was called "EWW ANG ITIM, MUKHANG MATANDA kasi di nakakapag ahit ng balbas at nakapagpagupit" minsan sasabihin pa nila "Huy kumain ka naman para ka nang kalansay" without knowing my whole story. One time I cried inside the confort room kasi I couldn't help myself na mainggit sa mga classmates ko nun na after class they will be having a talk about san sila mag lulunch if sa Jollibee ba, mcdo or sangyup. Samantalang ako, after class I was so busy meeting people with their orders. Minsan nadadaanan ko pa sila sa fast food having a good time while ako may bitbit na malaking basket puno ng sapatos na idedeliver.🙂 If my mandatory na event sa skul na need attendan, I used to ask people I don't know if may pwede ba akong mahihiraman ng susuotin tapos sasabihin nila try nila hanapan ako pero they then laugh at me afterwards. I feel so ashamed of doing it but I have to. So ayun na nga iniignore ko lang yung mga moment na tinatawanan ako sa looks ko, sa mga bagay na wala ako na meron sila. Basta focused ako sa acads ko nun at sa pagkita ng pera.
During my 3rd yr college. Yung part time kong work nagsara so I was forced to stop working with them na. And so yung pagbebenta ko ng sapatos nalang ginagawa ko. I was so lost that time kasi diko alam ako gagawin ko. Malaking tulong yun sakin lalo na 2yrs nalang kailangan kong tapusin sa pagaaral at mas malaki ang expenses ko na.Isang araw papasok ako ng gate sa skul and there are posters around our campus about scholarships and yung minimum qualified average. I have know idea if abot ba ng average ko dun sa offer ng scholars. so I run towards our registrar to request for a certificate of my grades. My world just stop for a while and I'm in tears kasi naabot nga. 86.04 yung average ko and the asking is 85.0.lang. moving forward, I got the scholarship and it helps me with my tuition fees. Kaya ang pinoproblema ko nalang non is bording house ko. Until meron na namang ibang offered na scholarships sa city so kahit sobrang haba ng pila,tiniis ko kasi I know it will save me. Luckily God is so good to me kaya I got them. That's why sa huling taon na pagaaral bago grumaduate, everything goes well and smooth because of those 3 scholarships. I Gave up selling shoes and focus sa exams nalang until I manage to graduate.....
July 2019.... FINALLY GRADUATED AND A CERTIFIED DEGREE HOLDER OF PSYCHOLOGY....
2024 update about me? I am now in a good path, I took a career that is relevant to my degree and still want exploring more things...

Isa akong batang laking mahirap. All the kinds of bullying naranasan kona and kahit I am on my adult stage na bakat na bakat padin sa ala ala ko kung ano ang mga napagdaanan ko during my years of schooling.
During my elementary days way back mga 2004-2010, baon ko 2 pesos a day pero hindi pa araw araw may baon. Minsan nag aabot sila mama at papa ng 5 pesos ng monday and that's it for the whole week. I am too innocent in those time kasi Im proud to say na never ako nag cocomplain to my parents regarding that,siguro dahil alam kong wala din naman magbabago if I ask them kasi I know na walang wala din naman talaga sila. Minsan yung mga kaklasmayt ko pa noon tinatawanan ako pag tinutulog ko lang ng recess time namin kahit yung tiyan ko tumutunog sa gutom, while them enjoying their meals and have money on their hands to show off. They don't wanna be friend with me either kasi di ako nakakasabay sa kung anong meron sila kaya ako yung typical na batang PAPASOK sa skul ,UUPO,TAHIMIK at magsasalita lang pag kinakausap. Ang tanging alam ko lang non is disiplinado ako ng mga magulang ko kaya naman never ako nanlimos ng kahit ano or nainvolve sa gulo or na guidance sa skul, if my conflict man non sakin at sa klasmayt ko, umiiwas nalang ako at mananahimik kasi takot akong magkamali eventhough sinasabihan na nila ako "DUWAG" "LAMPA" etc.... One time may pinapa project si teacher sakin that requires money to buy it. Sinabi ko din naman kila mama pero they can't provide so pagpasok ko ng umaga sa skul, sobrang kabado ako kasi lahat sila may maipapasang project and ako lang wala. Then when my name called by our teacher sinabi ko yung totoo but the teacher just say "Baka gusto ako pa magprovide para sayo" sabay tawa. Until then naging hobby na nya akong pagtawanan infront of his co teachers at sa mga students at ako lagi inuutusan taga bunot ng puting buhok nya.🤣 well nakakatawa nalang sya sakin now pag naaalala ko
Fast forward... 2011 Highschool days... I enter highschool like elem na walang wala din. All my things are old, from bag to notebooks, yung lapis ko parang nasa 3 inches nalang ang haba kasi di ko napapalitan. Even my slippers have butas na which is naging reason ng bullying din. Yung ibang klasmayts ko laging kinukwestyon bakit daw ganun di ako mabilhan ng mga magulang ko pero di ko sila sinasagot. Just like elem days, ako yung tipo ng stujanteng tahimik lang sa upuan, kaya ang tingin ng guro namin sakin "MABAIT" pero may mga guro padin na hindi talaga ako nagugustuhan dahil sa bagay na wala ako na meron madalas mga klasmayts ko. Malayo ang skul namin sa mga bahay namin kaya nagbabaon kami ng pang lunch namin. Madalas baon ko araw araw is itlog,pancit canton na isang piraso tapos ginagawa kong pang recess at lunch na yun. Even that thing I was questioned lagi by my klasmayts but I don't answer them. I was so lonely nun kasi wala naman gustong makipagkaibigan sakin, even if may groupings, I was left alone and doing my activity alone. If you guys are wondering how's my marks in school? I was a regular student and never ako na fail sa subject ko kasi yun din habilin ng magulang ko sakin. I was so obedient to my parents even those times na pinag aabsent nila ako para magtrabaho sa bukid at para may baon ako sa school.Then the next day, I will be punished in school for being absent without telling them my reasons. I know how hard my life is kaya nangangako ako sa sarili ko na I have to finish my studies kahit anong mangyari. There are some teachers who love humiliating me in front of many students for the things I have, such meron daw ako shoes na old pero walang socks, butas ang pantalon, and ngilaw na ngilaw ang puting uniporme signs of it being old enough. One thing I am struggling about is yung yellow pad paper, yun kasi gamit namin ng highschool and most of them have it tapos ako pag humihingi ako ayaw din naman ako bigyan, kaya ang ending I'm using notebooks as alternative for it. My teacher would question it again pero same thing, my silence is my response. In those years, teachers are allowed to beat students as sign of disiplina and I was beaten as a punishments for not providing projects and unattended classes dahil sa need ko kumita ng pera para may pambaon. Pag binabalikan ko siya, awang awa ako sa sarili ko. And those people who treated me that bad, I still remember them but I forgave them. Masakit lang pag naaalala ko😭 I just can't imagine na nalagpasan ko siya na ako lang magisa at walang nasandalan even my parents. All those bullying I have received from my society, inako ko lang magisa yun at none from my siblings and parents knows about it.
Fast forward...2015- 2019 College... This one is the most legit na sobrang hirap. Pero bago pa mag umpisa ang semester nun I confront my self na kahit anong mangyari " I have to be a regular students,walang bibitiw at wag na wag babagsak sa kahit anong subjects
1st -2nd year college ko, I tried everything I can, to provide for my own tuition fees and allowances. Yes nagbibigay sila mama at papa pero hindi kasya, minsan 150- 200 lang kaya nila iabot for a week allowance, ang bording house ko laging delayed ang bayad, and my tuition is always on hold kaya laging suki ako ng special exam. Pinasok ko mag work as taga dilig ng halaman and care taker ng isang bar and grill for the night and study in the morning. I have no choice but to do it cause ayokong mag stop sa pagaaral. Kaya naman pag sumasahod ako sa part time ko, binibili ko ng mga sapatos sa shoppee and then I resell it on facebook market online around the city. After my class ng afternoon dun ko sila minimeet up sa city and there I earned money. Tho, of all the efforts and hardships na ginagawa ko still my studies is my top priority. I was so payat sa sobrang pagod, puyat at stress.lagi pa akong nag nose bleeding and I was so worried for my health pero tuloy ang laban. Again, none from my siblings and parents knows about it. I kept it all alone and di din naman sila nag tatanong kasi they thought I am doing fine dahil wala din naman silang narerecieved na reklamo sakin. BULLYING? ofcourse di padin ako nakaligtas jan, I was called "EWW ANG ITIM, MUKHANG MATANDA kasi di nakakapag ahit ng balbas at nakapagpagupit" minsan sasabihin pa nila "Huy kumain ka naman para ka nang kalansay" without knowing my whole story. One time I cried inside the confort room kasi I couldn't help myself na mainggit sa mga classmates ko nun na after class they will be having a talk about san sila mag lulunch if sa Jollibee ba, mcdo or sangyup. Samantalang ako, after class I was so busy meeting people with their orders. Minsan nadadaanan ko pa sila sa fast food having a good time while ako may bitbit na malaking basket puno ng sapatos na idedeliver.🙂 If my mandatory na event sa skul na need attendan, I used to ask people I don't know if may pwede ba akong mahihiraman ng susuotin tapos sasabihin nila try nila hanapan ako pero they then laugh at me afterwards. I feel so ashamed of doing it but I have to. So ayun na nga iniignore ko lang yung mga moment na tinatawanan ako sa looks ko, sa mga bagay na wala ako na meron sila. Basta focused ako sa acads ko nun at sa pagkita ng pera.
During my 3rd yr college. Yung part time kong work nagsara so I was forced to stop working with them na. And so yung pagbebenta ko ng sapatos nalang ginagawa ko. I was so lost that time kasi diko alam ako gagawin ko. Malaking tulong yun sakin lalo na 2yrs nalang kailangan kong tapusin sa pagaaral at mas malaki ang expenses ko na.Isang araw papasok ako ng gate sa skul and there are posters around our campus about scholarships and yung minimum qualified average. I have know idea if abot ba ng average ko dun sa offer ng scholars. so I run towards our registrar to request for a certificate of my grades. My world just stop for a while and I'm in tears kasi naabot nga. 86.04 yung average ko and the asking is 85.0.lang. moving forward, I got the scholarship and it helps me with my tuition fees. Kaya ang pinoproblema ko nalang non is bording house ko. Until meron na namang ibang offered na scholarships sa city so kahit sobrang haba ng pila,tiniis ko kasi I know it will save me. Luckily God is so good to me kaya I got them. That's why sa huling taon na pagaaral bago grumaduate, everything goes well and smooth because of those 3 scholarships. I Gave up selling shoes and focus sa exams nalang until I manage to graduate.....
July 2019.... FINALLY GRADUATED AND A CERTIFIED DEGREE HOLDER OF PSYCHOLOGY....
2024 update about me? I am now in a good path, I took a career that is relevant to my degree and still want exploring more things...

Isa akong batang laking mahirap. All the kinds of bullying naranasan kona and kahit I am on my adult stage na bakat na bakat padin sa ala ala ko kung ano ang mga napagdaanan ko during my years of schooling.
During my elementary days way back mga 2004-2010, baon ko 2 pesos a day pero hindi pa araw araw may baon. Minsan nag aabot sila mama at papa ng 5 pesos ng monday and that's it for the whole week. I am too innocent in those time kasi Im proud to say na never ako nag cocomplain to my parents regarding that,siguro dahil alam kong wala din naman magbabago if I ask them kasi I know na walang wala din naman talaga sila. Minsan yung mga kaklasmayt ko pa noon tinatawanan ako pag tinutulog ko lang ng recess time namin kahit yung tiyan ko tumutunog sa gutom, while them enjoying their meals and have money on their hands to show off. They don't wanna be friend with me either kasi di ako nakakasabay sa kung anong meron sila kaya ako yung typical na batang PAPASOK sa skul ,UUPO,TAHIMIK at magsasalita lang pag kinakausap. Ang tanging alam ko lang non is disiplinado ako ng mga magulang ko kaya naman never ako nanlimos ng kahit ano or nainvolve sa gulo or na guidance sa skul, if my conflict man non sakin at sa klasmayt ko, umiiwas nalang ako at mananahimik kasi takot akong magkamali eventhough sinasabihan na nila ako "DUWAG" "LAMPA" etc.... One time may pinapa project si teacher sakin that requires money to buy it. Sinabi ko din naman kila mama pero they can't provide so pagpasok ko ng umaga sa skul, sobrang kabado ako kasi lahat sila may maipapasang project and ako lang wala. Then when my name called by our teacher sinabi ko yung totoo but the teacher just say "Baka gusto ako pa magprovide para sayo" sabay tawa. Until then naging hobby na nya akong pagtawanan infront of his co teachers at sa mga students at ako lagi inuutusan taga bunot ng puting buhok nya.🤣 well nakakatawa nalang sya sakin now pag naaalala ko
Fast forward... 2011 Highschool days... I enter highschool like elem na walang wala din. All my things are old, from bag to notebooks, yung lapis ko parang nasa 3 inches nalang ang haba kasi di ko napapalitan. Even my slippers have butas na which is naging reason ng bullying din. Yung ibang klasmayts ko laging kinukwestyon bakit daw ganun di ako mabilhan ng mga magulang ko pero di ko sila sinasagot. Just like elem days, ako yung tipo ng stujanteng tahimik lang sa upuan, kaya ang tingin ng guro namin sakin "MABAIT" pero may mga guro padin na hindi talaga ako nagugustuhan dahil sa bagay na wala ako na meron madalas mga klasmayts ko. Malayo ang skul namin sa mga bahay namin kaya nagbabaon kami ng pang lunch namin. Madalas baon ko araw araw is itlog,pancit canton na isang piraso tapos ginagawa kong pang recess at lunch na yun. Even that thing I was questioned lagi by my klasmayts but I don't answer them. I was so lonely nun kasi wala naman gustong makipagkaibigan sakin, even if may groupings, I was left alone and doing my activity alone. If you guys are wondering how's my marks in school? I was a regular student and never ako na fail sa subject ko kasi yun din habilin ng magulang ko sakin. I was so obedient to my parents even those times na pinag aabsent nila ako para magtrabaho sa bukid at para may baon ako sa school.Then the next day, I will be punished in school for being absent without telling them my reasons. I know how hard my life is kaya nangangako ako sa sarili ko na I have to finish my studies kahit anong mangyari. There are some teachers who love humiliating me in front of many students for the things I have, such meron daw ako shoes na old pero walang socks, butas ang pantalon, and ngilaw na ngilaw ang puting uniporme signs of it being old enough. One thing I am struggling about is yung yellow pad paper, yun kasi gamit namin ng highschool and most of them have it tapos ako pag humihingi ako ayaw din naman ako bigyan, kaya ang ending I'm using notebooks as alternative for it. My teacher would question it again pero same thing, my silence is my response. In those years, teachers are allowed to beat students as sign of disiplina and I was beaten as a punishments for not providing projects and unattended classes dahil sa need ko kumita ng pera para may pambaon. Pag binabalikan ko siya, awang awa ako sa sarili ko. And those people who treated me that bad, I still remember them but I forgave them. Masakit lang pag naaalala ko😭 I just can't imagine na nalagpasan ko siya na ako lang magisa at walang nasandalan even my parents. All those bullying I have received from my society, inako ko lang magisa yun at none from my siblings and parents knows about it.
Fast forward...2015- 2019 College... This one is the most legit na sobrang hirap. Pero bago pa mag umpisa ang semester nun I confront my self na kahit anong mangyari " I have to be a regular students,walang bibitiw at wag na wag babagsak sa kahit anong subjects
1st -2nd year college ko, I tried everything I can, to provide for my own tuition fees and allowances. Yes nagbibigay sila mama at papa pero hindi kasya, minsan 150- 200 lang kaya nila iabot for a week allowance, ang bording house ko laging delayed ang bayad, and my tuition is always on hold kaya laging suki ako ng special exam. Pinasok ko mag work as taga dilig ng halaman and care taker ng isang bar and grill for the night and study in the morning. I have no choice but to do it cause ayokong mag stop sa pagaaral. Kaya naman pag sumasahod ako sa part time ko, binibili ko ng mga sapatos sa shoppee and then I resell it on facebook market online around the city. After my class ng afternoon dun ko sila minimeet up sa city and there I earned money. Tho, of all the efforts and hardships na ginagawa ko still my studies is my top priority. I was so payat sa sobrang pagod, puyat at stress.lagi pa akong nag nose bleeding and I was so worried for my health pero tuloy ang laban. Again, none from my siblings and parents knows about it. I kept it all alone and di din naman sila nag tatanong kasi they thought I am doing fine dahil wala din naman silang narerecieved na reklamo sakin. BULLYING? ofcourse di padin ako nakaligtas jan, I was called "EWW ANG ITIM, MUKHANG MATANDA kasi di nakakapag ahit ng balbas at nakapagpagupit" minsan sasabihin pa nila "Huy kumain ka naman para ka nang kalansay" without knowing my whole story. One time I cried inside the confort room kasi I couldn't help myself na mainggit sa mga classmates ko nun na after class they will be having a talk about san sila mag lulunch if sa Jollibee ba, mcdo or sangyup. Samantalang ako, after class I was so busy meeting people with their orders. Minsan nadadaanan ko pa sila sa fast food having a good time while ako may bitbit na malaking basket puno ng sapatos na idedeliver.🙂 If my mandatory na event sa skul na need attendan, I used to ask people I don't know if may pwede ba akong mahihiraman ng susuotin tapos sasabihin nila try nila hanapan ako pero they then laugh at me afterwards. I feel so ashamed of doing it but I have to. So ayun na nga iniignore ko lang yung mga moment na tinatawanan ako sa looks ko, sa mga bagay na wala ako na meron sila. Basta focused ako sa acads ko nun at sa pagkita ng pera.
During my 3rd yr college. Yung part time kong work nagsara so I was forced to stop working with them na. And so yung pagbebenta ko ng sapatos nalang ginagawa ko. I was so lost that time kasi diko alam ako gagawin ko. Malaking tulong yun sakin lalo na 2yrs nalang kailangan kong tapusin sa pagaaral at mas malaki ang expenses ko na.Isang araw papasok ako ng gate sa skul and there are posters around our campus about scholarships and yung minimum qualified average. I have know idea if abot ba ng average ko dun sa offer ng scholars. so I run towards our registrar to request for a certificate of my grades. My world just stop for a while and I'm in tears kasi naabot nga. 86.04 yung average ko and the asking is 85.0.lang. moving forward, I got the scholarship and it helps me with my tuition fees. Kaya ang pinoproblema ko nalang non is bording house ko. Until meron na namang ibang offered na scholarships sa city so kahit sobrang haba ng pila,tiniis ko kasi I know it will save me. Luckily God is so good to me kaya I got them. That's why sa huling taon na pagaaral bago grumaduate, everything goes well and smooth because of those 3 scholarships. I Gave up selling shoes and focus sa exams nalang until I manage to graduate.....
July 2019.... FINALLY GRADUATED AND A CERTIFIED DEGREE HOLDER OF PSYCHOLOGY....
2024 update about me? I am now in a good path, I took a career that is relevant to my degree and still want exploring more things...

Isa akong batang laking mahirap. All the kinds of bullying naranasan kona and kahit I am on my adult stage na bakat na bakat padin sa ala ala ko kung ano ang mga napagdaanan ko during my years of schooling.
During my elementary days way back mga 2004-2010, baon ko 2 pesos a day pero hindi pa araw araw may baon. Minsan nag aabot sila mama at papa ng 5 pesos ng monday and that's it for the whole week. I am too innocent in those time kasi Im proud to say na never ako nag cocomplain to my parents regarding that,siguro dahil alam kong wala din naman magbabago if I ask them kasi I know na walang wala din naman talaga sila. Minsan yung mga kaklasmayt ko pa noon tinatawanan ako pag tinutulog ko lang ng recess time namin kahit yung tiyan ko tumutunog sa gutom, while them enjoying their meals and have money on their hands to show off. They don't wanna be friend with me either kasi di ako nakakasabay sa kung anong meron sila kaya ako yung typical na batang PAPASOK sa skul ,UUPO,TAHIMIK at magsasalita lang pag kinakausap. Ang tanging alam ko lang non is disiplinado ako ng mga magulang ko kaya naman never ako nanlimos ng kahit ano or nainvolve sa gulo or na guidance sa skul, if my conflict man non sakin at sa klasmayt ko, umiiwas nalang ako at mananahimik kasi takot akong magkamali eventhough sinasabihan na nila ako "DUWAG" "LAMPA" etc.... One time may pinapa project si teacher sakin that requires money to buy it. Sinabi ko din naman kila mama pero they can't provide so pagpasok ko ng umaga sa skul, sobrang kabado ako kasi lahat sila may maipapasang project and ako lang wala. Then when my name called by our teacher sinabi ko yung totoo but the teacher just say "Baka gusto ako pa magprovide para sayo" sabay tawa. Until then naging hobby na nya akong pagtawanan infront of his co teachers at sa mga students at ako lagi inuutusan taga bunot ng puting buhok nya.🤣 well nakakatawa nalang sya sakin now pag naaalala ko
Fast forward... 2011 Highschool days... I enter highschool like elem na walang wala din. All my things are old, from bag to notebooks, yung lapis ko parang nasa 3 inches nalang ang haba kasi di ko napapalitan. Even my slippers have butas na which is naging reason ng bullying din. Yung ibang klasmayts ko laging kinukwestyon bakit daw ganun di ako mabilhan ng mga magulang ko pero di ko sila sinasagot. Just like elem days, ako yung tipo ng stujanteng tahimik lang sa upuan, kaya ang tingin ng guro namin sakin "MABAIT" pero may mga guro padin na hindi talaga ako nagugustuhan dahil sa bagay na wala ako na meron madalas mga klasmayts ko. Malayo ang skul namin sa mga bahay namin kaya nagbabaon kami ng pang lunch namin. Madalas baon ko araw araw is itlog,pancit canton na isang piraso tapos ginagawa kong pang recess at lunch na yun. Even that thing I was questioned lagi by my klasmayts but I don't answer them. I was so lonely nun kasi wala naman gustong makipagkaibigan sakin, even if may groupings, I was left alone and doing my activity alone. If you guys are wondering how's my marks in school? I was a regular student and never ako na fail sa subject ko kasi yun din habilin ng magulang ko sakin. I was so obedient to my parents even those times na pinag aabsent nila ako para magtrabaho sa bukid at para may baon ako sa school.Then the next day, I will be punished in school for being absent without telling them my reasons. I know how hard my life is kaya nangangako ako sa sarili ko na I have to finish my studies kahit anong mangyari. There are some teachers who love humiliating me in front of many students for the things I have, such meron daw ako shoes na old pero walang socks, butas ang pantalon, and ngilaw na ngilaw ang puting uniporme signs of it being old enough. One thing I am struggling about is yung yellow pad paper, yun kasi gamit namin ng highschool and most of them have it tapos ako pag humihingi ako ayaw din naman ako bigyan, kaya ang ending I'm using notebooks as alternative for it. My teacher would question it again pero same thing, my silence is my response. In those years, teachers are allowed to beat students as sign of disiplina and I was beaten as a punishments for not providing projects and unattended classes dahil sa need ko kumita ng pera para may pambaon. Pag binabalikan ko siya, awang awa ako sa sarili ko. And those people who treated me that bad, I still remember them but I forgave them. Masakit lang pag naaalala ko😭 I just can't imagine na nalagpasan ko siya na ako lang magisa at walang nasandalan even my parents. All those bullying I have received from my society, inako ko lang magisa yun at none from my siblings and parents knows about it.
Fast forward...2015- 2019 College... This one is the most legit na sobrang hirap. Pero bago pa mag umpisa ang semester nun I confront my self na kahit anong mangyari " I have to be a regular students,walang bibitiw at wag na wag babagsak sa kahit anong subjects
1st -2nd year college ko, I tried everything I can, to provide for my own tuition fees and allowances. Yes nagbibigay sila mama at papa pero hindi kasya, minsan 150- 200 lang kaya nila iabot for a week allowance, ang bording house ko laging delayed ang bayad, and my tuition is always on hold kaya laging suki ako ng special exam. Pinasok ko mag work as taga dilig ng halaman and care taker ng isang bar and grill for the night and study in the morning. I have no choice but to do it cause ayokong mag stop sa pagaaral. Kaya naman pag sumasahod ako sa part time ko, binibili ko ng mga sapatos sa shoppee and then I resell it on facebook market online around the city. After my class ng afternoon dun ko sila minimeet up sa city and there I earned money. Tho, of all the efforts and hardships na ginagawa ko still my studies is my top priority. I was so payat sa sobrang pagod, puyat at stress.lagi pa akong nag nose bleeding and I was so worried for my health pero tuloy ang laban. Again, none from my siblings and parents knows about it. I kept it all alone and di din naman sila nag tatanong kasi they thought I am doing fine dahil wala din naman silang narerecieved na reklamo sakin. BULLYING? ofcourse di padin ako nakaligtas jan, I was called "EWW ANG ITIM, MUKHANG MATANDA kasi di nakakapag ahit ng balbas at nakapagpagupit" minsan sasabihin pa nila "Huy kumain ka naman para ka nang kalansay" without knowing my whole story. One time I cried inside the confort room kasi I couldn't help myself na mainggit sa mga classmates ko nun na after class they will be having a talk about san sila mag lulunch if sa Jollibee ba, mcdo or sangyup. Samantalang ako, after class I was so busy meeting people with their orders. Minsan nadadaanan ko pa sila sa fast food having a good time while ako may bitbit na malaking basket puno ng sapatos na idedeliver.🙂 If my mandatory na event sa skul na need attendan, I used to ask people I don't know if may pwede ba akong mahihiraman ng susuotin tapos sasabihin nila try nila hanapan ako pero they then laugh at me afterwards. I feel so ashamed of doing it but I have to. So ayun na nga iniignore ko lang yung mga moment na tinatawanan ako sa looks ko, sa mga bagay na wala ako na meron sila. Basta focused ako sa acads ko nun at sa pagkita ng pera.
During my 3rd yr college. Yung part time kong work nagsara so I was forced to stop working with them na. And so yung pagbebenta ko ng sapatos nalang ginagawa ko. I was so lost that time kasi diko alam ako gagawin ko. Malaking tulong yun sakin lalo na 2yrs nalang kailangan kong tapusin sa pagaaral at mas malaki ang expenses ko na.Isang araw papasok ako ng gate sa skul and there are posters around our campus about scholarships and yung minimum qualified average. I have know idea if abot ba ng average ko dun sa offer ng scholars. so I run towards our registrar to request for a certificate of my grades. My world just stop for a while and I'm in tears kasi naabot nga. 86.04 yung average ko and the asking is 85.0.lang. moving forward, I got the scholarship and it helps me with my tuition fees. Kaya ang pinoproblema ko nalang non is bording house ko. Until meron na namang ibang offered na scholarships sa city so kahit sobrang haba ng pila,tiniis ko kasi I know it will save me. Luckily God is so good to me kaya I got them. That's why sa huling taon na pagaaral bago grumaduate, everything goes well and smooth because of those 3 scholarships. I Gave up selling shoes and focus sa exams nalang until I manage to graduate.....
July 2019.... FINALLY GRADUATED AND A CERTIFIED DEGREE HOLDER OF PSYCHOLOGY....
2024 update about me? I am now in a good path, I took a career that is relevant to my degree and still want exploring more things...

Isa akong batang laking mahirap. All the kinds of bullying naranasan kona and kahit I am on my adult stage na bakat na bakat padin sa ala ala ko kung ano ang mga napagdaanan ko during my years of schooling.
During my elementary days way back mga 2004-2010, baon ko 2 pesos a day pero hindi pa araw araw may baon. Minsan nag aabot sila mama at papa ng 5 pesos ng monday and that's it for the whole week. I am too innocent in those time kasi Im proud to say na never ako nag cocomplain to my parents regarding that,siguro dahil alam kong wala din naman magbabago if I ask them kasi I know na walang wala din naman talaga sila. Minsan yung mga kaklasmayt ko pa noon tinatawanan ako pag tinutulog ko lang ng recess time namin kahit yung tiyan ko tumutunog sa gutom, while them enjoying their meals and have money on their hands to show off. They don't wanna be friend with me either kasi di ako nakakasabay sa kung anong meron sila kaya ako yung typical na batang PAPASOK sa skul ,UUPO,TAHIMIK at magsasalita lang pag kinakausap. Ang tanging alam ko lang non is disiplinado ako ng mga magulang ko kaya naman never ako nanlimos ng kahit ano or nainvolve sa gulo or na guidance sa skul, if my conflict man non sakin at sa klasmayt ko, umiiwas nalang ako at mananahimik kasi takot akong magkamali eventhough sinasabihan na nila ako "DUWAG" "LAMPA" etc.... One time may pinapa project si teacher sakin that requires money to buy it. Sinabi ko din naman kila mama pero they can't provide so pagpasok ko ng umaga sa skul, sobrang kabado ako kasi lahat sila may maipapasang project and ako lang wala. Then when my name called by our teacher sinabi ko yung totoo but the teacher just say "Baka gusto ako pa magprovide para sayo" sabay tawa. Until then naging hobby na nya akong pagtawanan infront of his co teachers at sa mga students at ako lagi inuutusan taga bunot ng puting buhok nya.🤣 well nakakatawa nalang sya sakin now pag naaalala ko
Fast forward... 2011 Highschool days... I enter highschool like elem na walang wala din. All my things are old, from bag to notebooks, yung lapis ko parang nasa 3 inches nalang ang haba kasi di ko napapalitan. Even my slippers have butas na which is naging reason ng bullying din. Yung ibang klasmayts ko laging kinukwestyon bakit daw ganun di ako mabilhan ng mga magulang ko pero di ko sila sinasagot. Just like elem days, ako yung tipo ng stujanteng tahimik lang sa upuan, kaya ang tingin ng guro namin sakin "MABAIT" pero may mga guro padin na hindi talaga ako nagugustuhan dahil sa bagay na wala ako na meron madalas mga klasmayts ko. Malayo ang skul namin sa mga bahay namin kaya nagbabaon kami ng pang lunch namin. Madalas baon ko araw araw is itlog,pancit canton na isang piraso tapos ginagawa kong pang recess at lunch na yun. Even that thing I was questioned lagi by my klasmayts but I don't answer them. I was so lonely nun kasi wala naman gustong makipagkaibigan sakin, even if may groupings, I was left alone and doing my activity alone. If you guys are wondering how's my marks in school? I was a regular student and never ako na fail sa subject ko kasi yun din habilin ng magulang ko sakin. I was so obedient to my parents even those times na pinag aabsent nila ako para magtrabaho sa bukid at para may baon ako sa school.Then the next day, I will be punished in school for being absent without telling them my reasons. I know how hard my life is kaya nangangako ako sa sarili ko na I have to finish my studies kahit anong mangyari. There are some teachers who love humiliating me in front of many students for the things I have, such meron daw ako shoes na old pero walang socks, butas ang pantalon, and ngilaw na ngilaw ang puting uniporme signs of it being old enough. One thing I am struggling about is yung yellow pad paper, yun kasi gamit namin ng highschool and most of them have it tapos ako pag humihingi ako ayaw din naman ako bigyan, kaya ang ending I'm using notebooks as alternative for it. My teacher would question it again pero same thing, my silence is my response. In those years, teachers are allowed to beat students as sign of disiplina and I was beaten as a punishments for not providing projects and unattended classes dahil sa need ko kumita ng pera para may pambaon. Pag binabalikan ko siya, awang awa ako sa sarili ko. And those people who treated me that bad, I still remember them but I forgave them. Masakit lang pag naaalala ko😭 I just can't imagine na nalagpasan ko siya na ako lang magisa at walang nasandalan even my parents. All those bullying I have received from my society, inako ko lang magisa yun at none from my siblings and parents knows about it.
Fast forward...2015- 2019 College... This one is the most legit na sobrang hirap. Pero bago pa mag umpisa ang semester nun I confront my self na kahit anong mangyari " I have to be a regular students,walang bibitiw at wag na wag babagsak sa kahit anong subjects
1st -2nd year college ko, I tried everything I can, to provide for my own tuition fees and allowances. Yes nagbibigay sila mama at papa pero hindi kasya, minsan 150- 200 lang kaya nila iabot for a week allowance, ang bording house ko laging delayed ang bayad, and my tuition is always on hold kaya laging suki ako ng special exam. Pinasok ko mag work as taga dilig ng halaman and care taker ng isang bar and grill for the night and study in the morning. I have no choice but to do it cause ayokong mag stop sa pagaaral. Kaya naman pag sumasahod ako sa part time ko, binibili ko ng mga sapatos sa shoppee and then I resell it on facebook market online around the city. After my class ng afternoon dun ko sila minimeet up sa city and there I earned money. Tho, of all the efforts and hardships na ginagawa ko still my studies is my top priority. I was so payat sa sobrang pagod, puyat at stress.lagi pa akong nag nose bleeding and I was so worried for my health pero tuloy ang laban. Again, none from my siblings and parents knows about it. I kept it all alone and di din naman sila nag tatanong kasi they thought I am doing fine dahil wala din naman silang narerecieved na reklamo sakin. BULLYING? ofcourse di padin ako nakaligtas jan, I was called "EWW ANG ITIM, MUKHANG MATANDA kasi di nakakapag ahit ng balbas at nakapagpagupit" minsan sasabihin pa nila "Huy kumain ka naman para ka nang kalansay" without knowing my whole story. One time I cried inside the confort room kasi I couldn't help myself na mainggit sa mga classmates ko nun na after class they will be having a talk about san sila mag lulunch if sa Jollibee ba, mcdo or sangyup. Samantalang ako, after class I was so busy meeting people with their orders. Minsan nadadaanan ko pa sila sa fast food having a good time while ako may bitbit na malaking basket puno ng sapatos na idedeliver.🙂 If my mandatory na event sa skul na need attendan, I used to ask people I don't know if may pwede ba akong mahihiraman ng susuotin tapos sasabihin nila try nila hanapan ako pero they then laugh at me afterwards. I feel so ashamed of doing it but I have to. So ayun na nga iniignore ko lang yung mga moment na tinatawanan ako sa looks ko, sa mga bagay na wala ako na meron sila. Basta focused ako sa acads ko nun at sa pagkita ng pera.
During my 3rd yr college. Yung part time kong work nagsara so I was forced to stop working with them na. And so yung pagbebenta ko ng sapatos nalang ginagawa ko. I was so lost that time kasi diko alam ako gagawin ko. Malaking tulong yun sakin lalo na 2yrs nalang kailangan kong tapusin sa pagaaral at mas malaki ang expenses ko na.Isang araw papasok ako ng gate sa skul and there are posters around our campus about scholarships and yung minimum qualified average. I have know idea if abot ba ng average ko dun sa offer ng scholars. so I run towards our registrar to request for a certificate of my grades. My world just stop for a while and I'm in tears kasi naabot nga. 86.04 yung average ko and the asking is 85.0.lang. moving forward, I got the scholarship and it helps me with my tuition fees. Kaya ang pinoproblema ko nalang non is bording house ko. Until meron na namang ibang offered na scholarships sa city so kahit sobrang haba ng pila,tiniis ko kasi I know it will save me. Luckily God is so good to me kaya I got them. That's why sa huling taon na pagaaral bago grumaduate, everything goes well and smooth because of those 3 scholarships. I Gave up selling shoes and focus sa exams nalang until I manage to graduate.....
July 2019.... FINALLY GRADUATED AND A CERTIFIED DEGREE HOLDER OF PSYCHOLOGY....
2024 update about me? I am now in a good path, I took a career that is relevant to my degree and still want exploring more things...

Name: Nura Rikuo
Age: 16
Gender: Male
Date of Birth: September 23
Relatives: Nura Sasaki (Grandfather), Nura Wakana (Mother), Nura Raiki (Father, Deceased), Nurarihyon (Ancestor), Nura Raihan (Ancestor), Nura Rihan (Ancestor)
Affiliation: Nura Clan, Shikoku Sorcerors (Temporary Allies), Dassai (Temporary Ally), Keikain Clan (Allies), Kiyojūji Paranormal Investigation Squad
Occupation: Jujutsu Sorceror, Supreme Commander of the Nura Clan, Young Master of The Nura Clan (Formerly), Student at Ukiyoe High
Grade: Semi-Grade 2 ("Normal" Form), Grade 1 ("True" Form)

Summary
Nura Rikuo is a Jujutsu Sorceror and current Head and Supreme Commander of the Nura Clan. He is a Descendant of the Lord of Pandemonium, Nurarihyon and Yohime. He currently is going to Ukiyoe High for his studies and while there, he meets with the Kiyojūji Paranormal Investigation Squad, and becomes a member, out of concern and worry for the group's endeavors.
He is a class celebrity and is known throughout the school as a good guy due to his volunteering on odd jobs and favors for everyone.

Appearance
Due to needing to hide his connections to the Nura Clan and Jujutsu in general, he possesses two forms as a result of a technique created by Nura Rihan, the 2nd Head, that hides their appearance and limits their powers.
In his "normal" form, Rikuo has brown eyes. His hair is two-toned; the top side is brown but the bottom side is dark brown (Saori describes it as "reverse pudding"). Even though his eyesight is perfect, he always wears glasses. Often, he is seen in his school uniform worn over a red sweater with running shoes, especially in public. Otherwise, he wears only his red sweater and khaki pants instead of the black pants in his school uniform.
Within the Nura House only, he can also be seen wearing a replication of Nurarihyon's past outfit: a cloak over a black kimono with traditional Japanese sandals (zōri), only Rikuo's cloak is blue instead of red.
Rikuo's transformation technique is normally deactivated at night time, during which he undergoes a drastic transformation. In his "true" form, Rikuo is significantly taller and older-looking, compared to his "normal" form. His eyes narrow and turn red. His hair grows long, he loses his glasses and his voice deepens. His appearance resembles that of Nurarihyon and Rihan in that his hair is long and protrudes out the back of his head. Like Nurarihyon, the top half of his hair is white while the bottom half of his hair is black. Always, his "true" form is seen with a blue cloak over a black kimono zōri. Midway through transforming into his "true" form, Rikuo temporarily retains his "normal" form's outfit. His hair grows longer and turns black and white, although not as long as his fully transformed form. He also appears taller than his "normal" form, but still shorter than his full "true" form.

Personality
In his "normal" form, Rikuo is seemingly weak and submissive towards authority, but he can be very clever and manipulating, as he manipulated one of the council members into isolating himself during a meeting and rationalizing against the dissolution of the Gyūki Group. At first he pretended to forget things he did in his "True" form, but after the confrontation with Gyuki concluded, he stopped pretending and decided to take on his responsibilities as the next Head. In this form, he is very kind, helpful and cheerful young man. He often is presented as weird due to his weird saying of "wanting to be normal", which hints to him wanting to have a normal life, outside of the Jujutsu World.
In his "true" form, Rikuo is more confident, strong, and inspires "Fear", a form of admiration within the Nura Clan, amongst his surbordinates and allies, leading to many wanting to join his side. While normally calm, reserved and in control, Rikuo can exhibit merciless conviction when in the presence of anyone whose beliefs challenge his, making him very dangerous once provoked. After losing a fight to his grandfather, he is taken to the sorceror village of Toono to train and finally learns what type of person he is, thus gaining stronger handle on what he's supposed to, and new abilities. He has departed for Kyoto to face Hagoromo Gitsune, save Yura and avenge his father. Although more laid back than his human form, presumably because of his unhindered powers, he exhibits a more serious face as compared to his father, grandfather and other Heads within the Clan, in their prime.
As a child, he was mischievous and playful, often playing pranks on his surbodinates and even council members. He was often running around the Nura Household and playing with the lower-ranking members, and was well-loved by them.
Originally, after the Gagoze Clan extermination and incident 4 years ago, he didn't want to do anything with the clan and Jujutsu in general, as it became to apparent he was naive and childish, on what they were supposed to do as Sorcerors of the Clan. He went as far as cutting off from going into to his "true" form and stayed only in his "normal" form as long as he could, and refused to join meetings and only use Jujutsu against curses he would come across. It was only after the incident on Mt.Nejireme with Gyuki, that he decided to stop running away and embrace what he had to do and become the Head that his Clan needs.
When he switches his Cursed Technique to "offense", he becomes more aggressive. Tsurara noted Rikuo acts more like his Day self; not being stuck up and taciturn.

Abilities and Skills
Being a descendant of Nurarihyon and the Current Head of the Nura Clan, Rikuo is undoubtedly skilled and powerful sorceror. Having inherited his families' cursed technique and trained his skills since a young age, he had become a powerful sorceror, able to fight against veteran sorcerors, such as Gyuki, Shoei, Tamazuki and Dassai, and exorcise powerful curses, like the Basement Ukiyoe curse and survived and even damaged Tsuchigumo.
==== True Form ==========================
Before his training from Gyuki and at Tono, he was able to easily destroy and dismantle the entire Kyūso Clan, a sorceror Clan that fought for the Nura Clan and were Excommuncated due to their activities surrounding killing non-sorcerors, especially women. He was able to fight on even grounds with Gyuki, though he was holding his true strength back a bit, kill off many of Tamazuki's surbordinates and even defeated Tamazuki himself, a powerful sorceror and strongest son of Inugamigyōbu Danuki, after he had gained the Maō's Hammer, though he was incredibly injured and exhausted after the fight and it only truly ended after Inugamigyōbu Danuki came to stop his Son. He could even fight and almost defeat Ryuji Keikain, a sorceror of the Keikain Clan and a canditate for head with incredibly talent, if it were not for Ryuji's trickery and the nature of his cursed technique.
After training in Tono, he gained a better understanding of his cursed technique and improved his Jujutsu and natural abilities to the point he could dodge an attack from his grandfather, despite failing to see him last time, fight an officer of Hagoromo Gitsune's group, who could damage and destroy part of the Treasured Boats, and even stood against Tsuchigumo for a short time, though he was absolutely destroyed along with his allies after Tsuchigumo got excited. After training with Gyuki and gaining Matoi, Rikuo's understanding of Jujutsu skyrocketed and improved his abilities to the point he could heavily damage Tsuchigumo, taking off 1 of his arms, fight on even grounds -without Matoi- against Kidomaru in his Domain and true form, eventually defeat him with little difficulty -after using Matoi- and fought on even grounds with Hagoromo Gitsune, one of the strongest individuals in Jujutsu, before he eventually was defeated, thanks to Hagoromo's superior combat experience and abilities.
After months of preparation and training for the inevitable war with the Gokadoin Family and Abe no Seimei, aka Nue, he gained more better understanding of technique after training with Itaku, a warrior of Tono, for months in-between his other duties to the point he was able to fight against Sanmoto Gorōzaemon's strongest and most Deadly body parts and officers of the 100 Tales Clan, such as the Bones, Mouth, Duodenum, and Arm of Sanmoto Gorōzaemon. He could defeat, along with the help of many others, a temporarily resurrected form Sanmoto Gorōzaemon and sent him back to Hell.
Afterwards, he was able to fight against the Gokadoin Heads, who were comparable to the strongest grade 1s and even Special Grade sorcerors of all time, with the help of the Alliance of clans who wished to defeat Seimei. On his own, he fought on equal grounds to Abe no Yoshihira, the true blood son of Seimei, and fought him to the death, until he eventually won after Yoshihira admitted to defeat and wished him to defeat his father. Later on, he, along with Hagoromo Gitsune, fought against Seimei and only win, after performing a Matoi with each other, defeating him and ending his plans for good.
It is presumed the Jujutsu HQ considers him a Special Grade Sorceror, similiar to Gojo, Yuta, Geto and Yuki, but decided to not give it to him since he is not officially apart of their organization. It should be noted Rikuo, in his "true form", while incredibly strong, is considered by Gojo, Sukuna and even Hagoromo Gitsune, to not be "True" Special Grade due to the fact, he lacks the pure power they had, and was still weaker than his ancestors, Nurarihyon and Nura Rihan at their peak, especially since Rihan was the strongest head and Nurarihyon managed to beat Hagoromo and fought Hidemoto, without Matoi, and with pure skill, although he is stated to still be growing and hasn't reached the peak of his abilities.
=== Normal Form =========================
In his "normal" form, Rikuo's abilities and power drop down, due to the technique he uses, to a semi-grade 2, and after his training, semi-grade 1 level. Despite this handicap, he is still able to beat any of the Kiyojūji Squad members in a fight, with exception to Torii in "Zen Mode", Tsurara, Aotabo and Yura, though he can still pressure them due to his skills and experience. While in this form, he cannot access his curse technique, even so he can use superb curse energy control and manipulation to compensate for this, along with barrier techniques and shikigami, if he wishes to use them. In this form, Rikuo is more resourceful and relies more on tactics, the environment, tools and the abilities of those around him.
While baiting out Inugami during the election speeches for student council, he manage to trick the Sorceror and fought on equal grounds before Inugami powered up with his curse technique and rage to overpower him and almost killed him if it were not for Rikuo changing to his "true" form and defeated him. During his training with Gyuki, he forced to spar him for days without rest, whether in his true or normal form, and managed to do well in his "normal" form, something Gyuki acknowledged during this time. After getting attacked by non-sorcerors about the Kudan rumoured spread, he was able to knockout and run away, while carrying Tsurara in his arms, all the attackers with incredible skill and fought for a brief time against the Duodenum of Sanmoto Gorōzaemon, an officer of the 100 Tales Clan.

Jujutsu
Immense Curse Energy: As a descendant of Nurarihyon and head of the Nura Clan, Rikuo possesses a large amount of curse energy beyond most grade 1 sorcerors, bordering Special Grade, though not near Yuta's level of reserves. In his "true" form, he can use the full extent of his curse energy reserves without any restriction with incredible fine-tune control and flexible manipulation of it, meanwhile in his "normal form", he is restricted to originally semi-grade 2 levels of his natural reserves, later on after training, semi-grade 1 levels but to compensate his control and manipulation of curse energy is more fluid and precise compared to his "true" form as he loses less curse energy, when using Jujutsu, compared to his "true" form.
His curse energy, when unleashed, is stated to overwhelming, full of pressure and surprisingly silent, a trait stated with his ancestors and predeccesors, making it seem like he is there and not there at the same time, while making it feel like he is a natural part of the scenery. His understanding of curse energy is constantly growing as time goes, as he faces greater threats as he becomes stronger. His understanding of curse energy, after the battle with Seimei, grew to the point he could use reverse curse technique and use domain expansion, after over a year of getting back into Jujutsu seriously.
Rikuo's growth was hinted to be severely stunted due to his decision to not use his "true" form and abilities as well as not train as seriously during his 4 year hiatus, as he managed to get to his current level after over a year of rigorous training and fights after he decided to embrace himself as a sorceror and as the future of the Nura Clan.
Curse Technique: Rikuo has inherited the Displacement, the inherited curse technqiue of the Nura Bloodline, that allows the user to create a dark energy called "Fear", using curse energy, and utilize it for many purposes. One of the uses of Displacement is it allows the user to increase their physical prowess further along with reinforcement of curse energy.
Its main characteristic is that it allows the user to mask their presence with "Fear", allowing them to be unseen by anyone. This ability allows them to do things without anyone noticing, making it difficult to locate them, and therefore, difficult to attack. This ability is strongest against opponents who rely heavily on sight and are weakest, against opponents who attack with natural reflexes. They can often mask their own "Fear", making themselves as easy to overlook as part of the scenery, allowing them to sneak around without anyone noticing, even if they are breaking objects, people are unable to see them, even if they are in front of them. The user can then Shift the awareness of the opponent, to cut their "Fear", essentially their focus, and land devastating attacks on them. This makes them essentially hard to deal with as you won't know where they are at, unless you use your other senses and are used to the illusionary abilities granted by the technique, as seen with Hagoromo Gitsune.
Another way to use this technique, is by unleashing the "Fear" that it creates, to rendering the opponent unable to move, see or sense the user's presence, by frightening them so much they will lose control of their curse energy. This skill was shown by Nura Sasaki and Nurarihyon, in their old age, hinting that this is a more advance technique rather than a alternative to using "Fear" to make yourself unseeable by the opponent. The technique possesses a mindscape where other users of the technique are shown to be around and show themselves if needed by Rikuo. After training in Tono, he could turn his "Fear" to offensive, increasing the power and speed of his attacks, to the point he could cut through the Bones of Sanmoto Gorōzaemon, who are as hard as diamonds.
The drawbacks to the technique are that it has a very limited offensive pool of attacks, as essentially, you are just landing attacks with the opponent not being able to see you. Other than that, you essentially have to use other ways to deal decisive damage to an opponent. Secondly, there is a limit to how strong the enhancing aspect of the technique can make you become, as Nurarihyon, in his prime, was still barely on par with Hagoromo-Gitsune's physical abilities while enhancing himself with the technique and was still hit with a barrage of attacks he couldn't dodge by her. Lastly, an opponent can get over the Shift awareness and overwhelming "Fear" aspect of the technique, if they are shown not to show fear or any emotion for the user, as seen with Itaku and Tsuchigumo, and disrupt their technique with their own power before it attacks land, such using an attack or ability that effects everyone and everything around them, instead of specific target.
Matoi: Rikuo learned how to use Matoi from Gyuki, who gave out vague hints to the technique, on Mount Tengu, and he first used it along with Zen. Matoi is a technique created by the 2nd Head, Nura Rihan, that allows the user and their allies to combine the powers of his allies with own, but only if their curse energy synchronises together and they both have trust in one another. He can use both the Kasane and Izutsu Method of the technique and switch between them in the heat of battle. With this technique, he could fight on even grounds with Special Grade level opponents such as Hagoromo Gitsune, Abe no Seimei, Tsuchigumo, Kenjaku and could impress Sukuna with his power.
Form Change Technique: A technique created by the 2nd, Nura Rihan, to hide their true power and appearance, as their curse technique grants them an unusual appearance by human standards, from anyone, even sorcerors like Sukuna, Kenjaku and Gojo could be fooled by the technique. Rikuo's use of the technique is superior to any of his predeccesors, as he managed to keep up his "normal" form for 4 years, without anyone ever figuring out what his "true" form looked like until he revealed it. This technique is usually dispelled at night time.
Reverse Curse Technique: Rikuo, during his battle with Hagoromo Gitsune, learnt how to use reverse curse technique on himself to heal wounds and injuries that he had on him, though his use at the time was considered amatuerish, inefficient, and wasteful use of curse energy, as he could not completely heal the wounds of his battle properly, after 2 days.
After intensive training in preparation for war with Seimei, he gained better understanding and mastery over this technique to the point he could heal list limbs, organs and could heal the parts of his right side, that were blown off by Seimei. with the help of Hagoromo Gitsune. His skill in this technique is still not as good as his ancestor, Yohime, who could heal others including sicknesses, diseases, poisons and even curses inflicted on there and herself, though he learnt to deal with poison with the technique, it is relatively slow in comparison to his limbs healing feats.
Rikuo is hinted to actually be using reverse curse technique as far back as the Mount Tengu training with Gyuki, with Zen hinting that he may have been unaware of his usage, due to how miniscule it is in comparison to an actual user of reverse curse technique.
Domain Expansion: His domain is called Generational Feudal Town, a node to his ancestry and the Town he lives in. It comes in the form of a town that is covered in trees, and surrounded by old feudal buildings that are slightly destroyed, with dark skies that illuminate the stars and dark clouds. There is a sakura tree on top of a mountain seen in the distance, that is surrounded by water. The sure-hit for this domain is the strike of leaves from the trees, for every step he and the others within the domain take, similiar to his Ancestor's, that causes large gash and slash wounds at random places. That only ones not affected by this domain are Rikuo and anyone he is close to by 2.1 meters.
This domain enhances his technique to the point not even those who use their natural senses and have already experience the attack patterns of the user, can read or see where the user is going to be, allowing them to truly be apart of the scenery of their domain. The user can enhance their strength to the point they can even damage Special Grade level opponents, even with their mastery of reinforcing their bodies with curse energy.
The domain is refined enough to make it clash with Abe no Seimei's, a master of Domain Expansion, though he states that it was only due to the power of his mother's domain, that also was activated and targeted only Seimei, that he could accomplish this feat. He has an amazing grasp on his domain, as he was able to change the set perimeters and target of his domain to what he wills though he notes it was too difficult to manage his domain if he did that. He can even change the coordinates of his domain to surprise others upon cancelling his domain.
Barrier Techniques: Rikuo is incredibly skilled in barriers as he was forced to make due with it upon forcing himself to stay in his "normal" form. He can create Curtains that can prevent others from entering and have specific conditions to make them stronger and harder to break even by a Grade 1 sorceror.
He can use Simple Domain with great use to defend himself from domains, as prior to the war with Abe no Seimei, he lacked a proper domain to use. He can also put binding vows on his Simple Domain to make it so anyone within the Simple Domain force to make a vow of non-violence or else there are expelled from the domain.
He can even use Domain Amplification, after watching Itaku use it a multitude of times during their training in Tono. He can swiftly change between using Amplification and his innate technique, though his use is nowhere near as efficient as Sukuna, Kenjaku, Abe no Seimei or even Itaku, due to the fact he requires to stay still for a few seconds to do the switch, making him vulnerable during that small gap in time.
Binding Vows: He made a binding vow with Yura, that he would fight together with her, in exchange he would tell her everything he was hiding from her since the very beginning, if they managed to survive their battle with Hagoromo Gitsune at the time.

Other Abilities
Skilled Swordsman: Rikuo has excellent swordsmanship as he was trained since he was young and was a natural at the art. His skills in the sword didn't diminish during his 4 year hiatus, according to Gyuki and Nura Sasaki, it instead had increase as he was still fighting curses though not as often and still regularly trained, as a way of self defense.
His way of sword fighting is by dodging, weaving and parrying his enemies' attacks while adjusting to every little change and movement, and then striking back with fast cuts, strong slashes and precise stabs. His skill in swordsmanship is his main form of combat and has been able to fight against Gyuki, Itaku, Kubinashi and Kurotabo, Kidomaru, Tsuchigumo and even Hagoromo Gitsune in battle with just his sword skills and basic usage of his curse technique.
His skills however, pale in comparison with his ancestors, especially Nurarihyon and Nura Rihan, who are master swordsman who fought against these opponents with only their blades, and as seen in the mindscape of his inherited technique, Nurarihyon completely overwhelmed him with just his skill in the blade and Rihan simply dodge and parried all his attacks and considered him still green, comparing him to a kid with a sword.
Hand-to-hand combat: Despite not liking it as much as using a sword, Rikuo is still skilled in unarmed combat, being able to keep up with Itaku's hand-to-hand combat skills and defeat the Kiyojūji Squad, barring Aotabo and Maki, and Yura in a spar. His skill in hand-to-hand is considered lower than Maki's as Maki is better at different Style's of fighting in comparison to Rikuo, who is more experienced than her, which allows him to get an edge over her sometimes.
Intelligence: Rikuo's most underrated feature is his intelligence. In school, he ranked 4th behind Kiyotsugu, only because he was not puting any effort into it as his dealing with the Jujutsu and Nura Clan made him too busy to focus on studying properly. His intelligence can be seen in combat where he manages to outsmart his opponents, whether in his "normal" or "true" form, by using simple distraction, using the knowledge of the area around him as well as the environment, and using underhanded tricks to get a good hit at his opponents. He also has a large amount of knowledge on Jujutsu and has an incredibly high understanding of curse energy. In fact, among the Squad, only Yura can match him Jujutsu. with Aotabo, Tsurara and Natsumi just behind them. (Note: I said Kana had talent on par with Natsumi in another post, but thats only in terms of using curse energy, which feels more natural to her than understanding how Jujutsu works.)

Cursed Tool
Nenekirimaru: Rikuo inherited the heirloom of the Clan, which is Cursed Tool called Nenekirimaru. It is a sword which only cuts through curses and anything related to it such as cursed techniques. With every slash, depending on the size of it, the sword weakens the curse around it, making it a highly effective against any type of Curse and cursed technique, including the Limitless of the Gojo Clan. It was destroyed by Abe no Seimei during their first fight and later reforged and made stronger by Akifusa Keikain, in preparation for the war.
Sakura Sake Cup: A cursed tool within the Nura Clan. Nurarihyon gained this tool after his journey to Tono where he was gifted this by the Lord of Tono at the time, as a departuring gift. The curse tool can create hot blue flames, upon pouring sake and imbuing it with curse energy. The flames can burn through human flesh, exorcise low level curses completely and damage high level curses and opponents. He can also the flames to increase the strength of his swords if he wishes to, by surrounding the flames around his sword with curse energy layering.
Katanas: He has multiple katanas laying around the Nura Household, in case he doesn't have access to Nenekirimaru. He carries one around him along with Nenekirimaru, at all times. There are constantly imbued with his curse energy, making them into cursed tools.

Trivia
*Rikuo's belongings are: Handkerchief, doll, the book: "How To Become A Fine Human", Nurarihyon's pipe and the Sakura Sake Cup.
*Rikuo has actually shown his "true" form towards the other members of the Squad, at very separate times 4 years ago.
*Natsumi and Rikuo are notably closer than the other members actually think, as they tend to patrol the neighbourhood together quite often and tend to help each other with jobs given by the teachers and sometimes other students, prior to Tsurara becoming a student there, making the others think especially Maki, Kana and Tsurara that there is something hidden between them.
In truth, Natsumi is actually attacted to Rikuo and admires his way of doing things, so she just tends to volunteer to do work with to ease his burden, even just little. Rikuo is not aware of this though, mainly due to the fact he is attracted to Tsurara instead, something that Natsumi notices and supports.
*Rikuo's attraction towards Tsurara is actually hinted since he was still a young boy, as he tended to prank her the most as a child and tended to listen to her more thanbhe listens to Kubinashi, Kurotabo and even Aotabo, who have actually taken care of him longer than Tsurara. He reveals later to his grandfather, who was teasing him about it, that was just his kid's self way of getting her attention towards him and didn't how else to do so.
*Rikuo, despite his "normal" forms appearance, is very atlethic as he was often asked by multiple sports clubs to join their team for practice matches and even tournaments. He is able to keep up with Shima in soccer matches and sometimes chosen, against his will, to represent the school along with the actual soccer team. He is shown doing any and many types of task that require a certain amount of physicality, such as lifting up 3 tables on his own, speeding and buying all the requested food from the cafeteria for his classmates and carry a large stack of books, to the point it covers his entire being, to the teacher's office. Its noted by Yura and Natsumi that Rikuo does not use any curse energy when doing so, making it even more impressive than originally thought of.
*When he was a child, he and grandfather would go to a diner to eat and then leave without paying. This would later be called the legendary Nurarihyon "Dine-and-Dash" by the local dinners, as Nurarihyon is famous for doing so back in the Sengoku Period. Rikuo would later do this with Yura in Kyoto, where he left her to pay for his food without her noticing, much to her anger.

Recently I tape moded my keychrom C3 Pro, and here are some notes and some of the results.
I puted 2 layers of tape, I used thin tape, which I don't recommend, you should use a rather larger tape.
My LEDs stopped working, haven't found the reason. If you want to risk your pure led red there is no problem, but if you want to be carefull use gloves and try to avoid anything that can cause Static Energy.
Try putting some tape under the larger keys like the space bar. it will THOCK.
If you want to know how to remove the case and see the insides here on 5:20 you can see how to disassemble it.

Isa akong batang laking mahirap. All the kinds of bullying naranasan kona and kahit I am on my adult stage na bakat na bakat padin sa ala ala ko kung ano ang mga napagdaanan ko during my years of schooling.
During my elementary days way back mga 2004-2010, baon ko 2 pesos a day pero hindi pa araw araw may baon. Minsan nag aabot sila mama at papa ng 5 pesos ng monday and that's it for the whole week. I am too innocent in those time kasi Im proud to say na never ako nag cocomplain to my parents regarding that,siguro dahil alam kong wala din naman magbabago if I ask them kasi I know na walang wala din naman talaga sila. Minsan yung mga kaklasmayt ko pa noon tinatawanan ako pag tinutulog ko lang ng recess time namin kahit yung tiyan ko tumutunog sa gutom, while them enjoying their meals and have money on their hands to show off. They don't wanna be friend with me either kasi di ako nakakasabay sa kung anong meron sila kaya ako yung typical na batang PAPASOK sa skul ,UUPO,TAHIMIK at magsasalita lang pag kinakausap. Ang tanging alam ko lang non is disiplinado ako ng mga magulang ko kaya naman never ako nanlimos ng kahit ano or nainvolve sa gulo or na guidance sa skul, if my conflict man non sakin at sa klasmayt ko, umiiwas nalang ako at mananahimik kasi takot akong magkamali eventhough sinasabihan na nila ako "DUWAG" "LAMPA" etc.... One time may pinapa project si teacher sakin that requires money to buy it. Sinabi ko din naman kila mama pero they can't provide so pagpasok ko ng umaga sa skul, sobrang kabado ako kasi lahat sila may maipapasang project and ako lang wala. Then when my name called by our teacher sinabi ko yung totoo but the teacher just say "Baka gusto ako pa magprovide para sayo" sabay tawa. Until then naging hobby na nya akong pagtawanan infront of his co teachers at sa mga students at ako lagi inuutusan taga bunot ng puting buhok nya.🤣 well nakakatawa nalang sya sakin now pag naaalala ko
Fast forward... 2011 Highschool days... I enter highschool like elem na walang wala din. All my things are old, from bag to notebooks, yung lapis ko parang nasa 3 inches nalang ang haba kasi di ko napapalitan. Even my slippers have butas na which is naging reason ng bullying din. Yung ibang klasmayts ko laging kinukwestyon bakit daw ganun di ako mabilhan ng mga magulang ko pero di ko sila sinasagot. Just like elem days, ako yung tipo ng stujanteng tahimik lang sa upuan, kaya ang tingin ng guro namin sakin "MABAIT" pero may mga guro padin na hindi talaga ako nagugustuhan dahil sa bagay na wala ako na meron madalas mga klasmayts ko. Malayo ang skul namin sa mga bahay namin kaya nagbabaon kami ng pang lunch namin. Madalas baon ko araw araw is itlog,pancit canton na isang piraso tapos ginagawa kong pang recess at lunch na yun. Even that thing I was questioned lagi by my klasmayts but I don't answer them. I was so lonely nun kasi wala naman gustong makipagkaibigan sakin, even if may groupings, I was left alone and doing my activity alone. If you guys are wondering how's my marks in school? I was a regular student and never ako na fail sa subject ko kasi yun din habilin ng magulang ko sakin. I was so obedient to my parents even those times na pinag aabsent nila ako para magtrabaho sa bukid at para may baon ako sa school.Then the next day, I will be punished in school for being absent without telling them my reasons. I know how hard my life is kaya nangangako ako sa sarili ko na I have to finish my studies kahit anong mangyari. There are some teachers who love humiliating me in front of many students for the things I have, such meron daw ako shoes na old pero walang socks, butas ang pantalon, and ngilaw na ngilaw ang puting uniporme signs of it being old enough. One thing I am struggling about is yung yellow pad paper, yun kasi gamit namin ng highschool and most of them have it tapos ako pag humihingi ako ayaw din naman ako bigyan, kaya ang ending I'm using notebooks as alternative for it. My teacher would question it again pero same thing, my silence is my response. In those years, teachers are allowed to beat students as sign of disiplina and I was beaten as a punishments for not providing projects and unattended classes dahil sa need ko kumita ng pera para may pambaon. Pag binabalikan ko siya, awang awa ako sa sarili ko. And those people who treated me that bad, I still remember them but I forgave them. Masakit lang pag naaalala ko😭 I just can't imagine na nalagpasan ko siya na ako lang magisa at walang nasandalan even my parents. All those bullying I have received from my society, inako ko lang magisa yun at none from my siblings and parents knows about it.
Fast forward...2015- 2019 College... This one is the most legit na sobrang hirap. Pero bago pa mag umpisa ang semester nun I confront my self na kahit anong mangyari " I have to be a regular students,walang bibitiw at wag na wag babagsak sa kahit anong subjects
1st -2nd year college ko, I tried everything I can, to provide for my own tuition fees and allowances. Yes nagbibigay sila mama at papa pero hindi kasya, minsan 150- 200 lang kaya nila iabot for a week allowance, ang bording house ko laging delayed ang bayad, and my tuition is always on hold kaya laging suki ako ng special exam. Pinasok ko mag work as taga dilig ng halaman and care taker ng isang bar and grill for the night and study in the morning. I have no choice but to do it cause ayokong mag stop sa pagaaral. Kaya naman pag sumasahod ako sa part time ko, binibili ko ng mga sapatos sa shoppee and then I resell it on facebook market online around the city. After my class ng afternoon dun ko sila minimeet up sa city and there I earned money. Tho, of all the efforts and hardships na ginagawa ko still my studies is my top priority. I was so payat sa sobrang pagod, puyat at stress.lagi pa akong nag nose bleeding and I was so worried for my health pero tuloy ang laban. Again, none from my siblings and parents knows about it. I kept it all alone and di din naman sila nag tatanong kasi they thought I am doing fine dahil wala din naman silang narerecieved na reklamo sakin. BULLYING? ofcourse di padin ako nakaligtas jan, I was called "EWW ANG ITIM, MUKHANG MATANDA kasi di nakakapag ahit ng balbas at nakapagpagupit" minsan sasabihin pa nila "Huy kumain ka naman para ka nang kalansay" without knowing my whole story. One time I cried inside the confort room kasi I couldn't help myself na mainggit sa mga classmates ko nun na after class they will be having a talk about san sila mag lulunch if sa Jollibee ba, mcdo or sangyup. Samantalang ako, after class I was so busy meeting people with their orders. Minsan nadadaanan ko pa sila sa fast food having a good time while ako may bitbit na malaking basket puno ng sapatos na idedeliver.🙂 If my mandatory na event sa skul na need attendan, I used to ask people I don't know if may pwede ba akong mahihiraman ng susuotin tapos sasabihin nila try nila hanapan ako pero they then laugh at me afterwards. I feel so ashamed of doing it but I have to. So ayun na nga iniignore ko lang yung mga moment na tinatawanan ako sa looks ko, sa mga bagay na wala ako na meron sila. Basta focused ako sa acads ko nun at sa pagkita ng pera.
During my 3rd yr college. Yung part time kong work nagsara so I was forced to stop working with them na. And so yung pagbebenta ko ng sapatos nalang ginagawa ko. I was so lost that time kasi diko alam ako gagawin ko. Malaking tulong yun sakin lalo na 2yrs nalang kailangan kong tapusin sa pagaaral at mas malaki ang expenses ko na.Isang araw papasok ako ng gate sa skul and there are posters around our campus about scholarships and yung minimum qualified average. I have know idea if abot ba ng average ko dun sa offer ng scholars. so I run towards our registrar to request for a certificate of my grades. My world just stop for a while and I'm in tears kasi naabot nga. 86.04 yung average ko and the asking is 85.0.lang. moving forward, I got the scholarship and it helps me with my tuition fees. Kaya ang pinoproblema ko nalang non is bording house ko. Until meron na namang ibang offered na scholarships sa city so kahit sobrang haba ng pila,tiniis ko kasi I know it will save me. Luckily God is so good to me kaya I got them. That's why sa huling taon na pagaaral bago grumaduate, everything goes well and smooth because of those 3 scholarships. I Gave up selling shoes and focus sa exams nalang until I manage to graduate.....
July 2019.... FINALLY GRADUATED AND A CERTIFIED DEGREE HOLDER OF PSYCHOLOGY....
2024 update about me? I am now in a good path, I took a career that is relevant to my degree and still want exploring more things...