Love things to say in a birthday card

Adult daughter and mother situation, I'm the daughter.
She and my father moved very far away 10+ years ago to a remote place not convenient for anybody to visit easily. She is incredibly clingy and has long insisted that my siblings and I HAVE to move back in with them at some point. None of us like where they live and we have happy lives elsewhere. But there is no alternative in mom's mind. My siblings and I can't even talk about future plans or life events if they involve any form of independence or geographical separation from her without her completely flipping out.
She has always been a negative person, but lately she has become incredibly negative and is diving down every ridiculous conspiracy rabbit hole, as well as watching videos of people losing their lives in gruesome ways as a way to pass the time. What's even weirder is she is sending me these videos as if she thinks i would enjoy them too. I have asked her to stop twice and she's still doing it. She doesn't get any exercise, doesn't eat well, doesn't take care of herself (dad does literally every chore and cooks her meals), so the majority of her waking hours are spent online.
Today she stated very matter of factly that if my siblings and I don't move back in soon, or at least make a solid plan to do so, that she otherwise has no reason to live anymore. She didn't directly threaten you-know-what and she never would do it, she has a history of occasionally making veiled threats when she doesn't get "her way" about something or to get attention.
Here's the honest truth that I cannot tell her without her getting so mad that she ends our relationship: I have zero intention of ever WILLINGLY moving in with them, short of an emergency medical situation. I have battled diagnosed PTSD that is largely caused by events that she perpetrated. Both my parents (tho mostly my mom) have refused to even meet my partner of 9 years and have made it clear she is never welcome to visit, let alone live. So basically my mother is demanding me to completely abandon my current life, loved ones, friendships, etc. that I have built in order to make her happy, "or else".
My mother used to be in therapy and on medication and it helped greatly, but she has refused to get any mental help for many years. In fact, the only thing she seems happy to talk to me about lately is how mentally "defective" I am and to be nosey about how my "desperately needed" 2 therapy sessions a week are going, and critisizing my "emotional disregulation" if I don't keep my tone impossibly steady at all times, and how she thinks my meds need changing. She refuses to look at her own flaws/issues and instead will harp on the inadequacies of everyone around her.
In my heart I believe the only way she is going to get better is if she finds some purpose in her life that doesn't involve her adult children (or my father) catering to her every whim. Is it my job to prop my mother up the rest of hemy life? Am I allowed to pursue a life that makes me happy if it's at the expense hers? How do I deal with this situation long term?

Here's what I mean...
Like some people on this sub, I just started drawing. I worked on straight and tapered lines and saw great improvement. (Only 2 days though)
Then I started working on squares, rectangles, triangles, circles, and ellipses. (Only 1 day though). Saw improvement and started getting better.
Then I had a problem I wanted to start moving into 3d and I realized while I can draw these simple basic shapes, I still am not a master of 2d, here's what I mean.
I can't draw a pentagon, octagon, hexagon, heart, star, flower, etc.
I can't look at any 2d image and instantly be able to draw it.
Eg: Vector icons, 2d vector man, Number 2 drawing, Phineas & Ferb, Maple leaf
Sans(not in pixelated form though).
I keep on having this fear that if I start to learn 3d fundamentals and become a great artist(hopefully). I would run into problems due to my lack of not being able to draw every 2d image.
Here's what I mean:
What if I want to sign a heart next to my name or add a heart somewhere in my drawing but can't?
Or I want to draw a star in my art but can't.
Or I want to draw the petal part of a flower but I can't
Or in biology class (when I get to grade 9) we're asked to draw a vector image like the person, shown here: 2d vector man to then use to label some random system in the human body but I can't.
Or in math class were' meant to draw an octagonal-shaped pyramid but I can't
The list goes on and on and on and on, you get the idea.
So I want to know 3 things
Do I need to be a master of anything 2d before I move on to 3d?
- If I do how long should I spend on it before moving on to 3d art? ( I know people might say that depends on you but I want to know a rough estimate of the time I should spend on this if I'm drawing any chance I get, which is a lot) 2 days, 3 days, 1 week, 2 weeks a month.
- If I don't and only need to learn squares, rectangles, triangles, circles, and ellipses. how long should I spend on it before moving on to 3d art? ( I know people might say that depends on you but I want to know a rough estimate of the time I should spend on this if I'm drawing any chance I get, which is a lot) 2 days, 3 days, 1 week, 2 weeks a month.
Thank you for reading this far
Au revoir :)

hello! i dont use this app but i didnt know where else to go to ask people about this.
i just turned 19 and found out i have moderately severe hearing loss (my first hearing test was a humbling experience to say the least.. i expected mild.)
bilateral sensorineural hearing loss if that helps, and my audiometry test is relatively flat in all frequencies. it was not sudden, but progressed over a couple months? a year? we suspect aeid.
regardless, i recently invested in some hearing aids (signia styletto 2ax) and my audiologist recommended getting custom earmolds because my ear canals are uneven n small so i had issues with all their domes.
the problem starts once she puts in the otoblock/cotton thingy and puts the liquid mold on top. i found out later that otoblocks usually have strings online but mine didnt. when she removed the mold, only the mold came out and the otoblock was stuck deep in my ear canal.
my audiologist clearly panicked, she tried to "push" it out with those little light pointy devices which hurt like a bitch and i grabbed her hand to stop it but she didnt. after 5 minutes of her disappearance and silence she told me we had to go to an ENT to get it removed.
that we did, and she had damaged my canals while trying to get it out as it was bleeding on the inside, making it click for the ENT that i wasn't whining over the otoblock but the literal bleeding scab in my ear.
my audiologist was very apologetic, saying its the first time this ever happened (a bit odd considering they got stuck in Both ears) and we kind of just left after the ent thing as i had just came back from a two hour session methylprednisolone, mris, a blood test, audiometry. im sure you understand the toll it takes on you. long day.
my question is, is this normal? whos fault is this? should otoblock always have a string in cases like this? or is it some preference/stock thing that went wrong?
i'm not sure where to go through from here, considering i do need them personalized but i don't know if i should trust them to do it again and im not sure whos fault it is. there's not wlot of place that deal w this thing where i live.
sincerely a 19 year old who found out i have moderately severe hearing loss way too late with absolutely no one to go for questions like this. thank you for your time :]

Me 20F and my boyfriend 23M have been together for 3 years already. We have a history of him lying over small things and me forgiving him. Lately I was feeling he was a little bit weird with me but I told him that I was working on trusting him more and that we were doing better. I told him that I trusted him and that it was better if he was transparent with me even if I was going to be annoyed at whatever truth he would be doing. Today he lies to me about being high after work, I saw him and realized he was in a weird mood and noticed his eyes, I asked him about it and he called me crazy and lied saying that it was only bc he was tired. He has lied about him smoking in the past bc he says he shouldn’t tell me if he does it or not. Hours later, I see a message from his boss reminding him about them smoking after work together and I realized he lied to me. I confronted him about and he told me to fuck off and that he wanted to be alone, he hasn’t talk to me since then. I don’t know what to do and if this should be a reason to finally break up with him or do things better? Is he an asshole?

Hi, i'm 21F and my boyfriend is 24M. I accidentally got pregnant after a few months of dating. He said he wanted it gone and I said I do not, then we started arguing.
My family abandoned me because of the depression and stress I was under. And because I was pregnant. He kept having a go, abusing me, telling me to be logical, calling me names simply for being concerned with my health and wellbeing (we'd argue to the point of me getting 4h of sleep a night for nearly 4 months into the pregnancy, and from the stress I wasn't able to do much around the house and i'd eat one meal a day). He claimed he'd lie about dna tests too when I talked about child support with him.
Anytime I tried to do the right thing by my family, I was never good enough. My family's the kind to physically and emotionally abuse people. My aunty who worked for the police showed bruises on her arms to me telling me that if I called the police on her for her abuse, she'd claim I did it to her. And she'd always call relatives to complain about me. My Dad likes to control people and refuses to take accountability for his actions or make up for his actions. I've had the fortune to have lived in a non-abusive household for some of my life so I'm aware of how family dynamics ARE supposed to go. My aunty called the police on me over not washing a cup that I was going to reuse. This is the kind of mentality they have; extremely high standards for one person whilst the other drinks and blames others for their actions. And I had to either live with them people or go homeless. We'd starve as well. I thought it was normal to go on one snack a day till I was 19. I'm not abusive in those regards, in fact I try to stand up for myself and go to therapy and work on myself. However I will defend myself when i'm being abused. But since i'm always told i'm wrong no matter what, I thought my boyfriends abuse was me having the issues and not him.
I'm okay now, i'm in recovery with family friends and they've helped me a lot.
He said he wanted to marry me and that he loved me, but his abuse and a lack of care for how I feel really affected me overall. Not only that, but also the way my family was treating me at the same time. I had depression and I was extremely anxious. He'd call me a cunt, a hypochondriac, etc.
Now he says he wants to be part of her life. He continued to say he wants to be married and that he loves me, but then he told me the only reason why he's bothering to talk to me is because of her and he would've dropped me otherwise.
We live in different countries too.
The fighting has really affected my self esteem and for god sakes I don't want my daughter having a father implement stress onto her life, making her feel unwanted, much like myself.
I emailed him saying either he can change his act or he can leave us alone. I don't want child support from him either i've got enough money to support this child. I just want him to leave us. He's put me through so much stress as it is. I don't know what to think anymore. I don't want to marry someone on the basis of a child alone - one that he doesn't even want. An unhappy marriage only fucks with a kid. I would know as my parents were unhappy and they abused each other and my sister and I. My parents never went to therapy either whereas I do and try everything in my power to try to be good.
I want my daughter to have a better life than I did. He said he doesn't want to travel over to my country to see the kid and that i'm being selfish by not marrying him. I told him that he can see her if he wants to but he needs to make the effort to travel over here, because i'm not moving to his country, especially after he dragged me and made me look like an asshole in front of his family.
Note: He's my first boyfriend. I didn't know better due to extremely poor family dynamics. I know better now. I just want to improve myself, get back on my feet and prioritise myself and my daughter.
Any advice would be much appreciated ❤️
The stuff i'm currently working on:

• My health. I'm eating a lot more healthily than ever and my pregnancy is going well because of it :) so s my mental and physical wellbeing. I'm no longer nearly as depressed and anxious, especially since i've stopped speaking to him.
• I've been doing more around the house which I was struggling with.
• I've been watching videos on how to have less of an anxious-attachment style and instead a healthy one.
• I'm journalling and trying to write positive affirmations as well as planning.
• I'm surrounding myself with more positive people.
• I'm learning skills and techniques to deal with negativity.
• I'm seeing a counsellor and GP for help too.
• I've got a house arrangement sorted.
• I've been exercising everyday.

Advice is appreciated.

I (F/35) have been married to my husband (M/50) for 6 years. I’m his second wife, and he is my first husband. We had some challenges after we got married, which we worked through with a couples therapist and have been doing great for the past 3 years. We had a baby a year ago. It was my first, and his third (two from previous marriage, live with us 50/50).
My husband has high paying job and I work part time. He covers a lot of the bills and earns us a very nice lifestyle, which I’m thankful for.
He is the kind of person who values “experiences”, and while I also value that, I like to collect nice items that I get to keep forever. He knows that I care about material things too, and that I have a taste for high quality and high end items, I buy from time to time and pay for them myself.
That being said, I think my love language is gifts, and I love to be spoiled. Not all the time, but it would be nice for big events, like having a baby or a big anniversary. And a year ago, we became parents together.
Recently, he discovered this brand of really cheap jewelry, like really really cheap. He gave me two pairs of earrings from them: one for my birthday and one for Christmas. He also gave me a $400 jacket for Christmas, so it’s not like he’s being frugal or entirely cheap. He can be generous when he wants to.
It says their jewelry is 14k plated but their earrings retail for $18 and $13, so I’m really not sure how there’s any actual gold in it.
The reason I looked it up was because I saw him digging through my boxes of jewelry to use for the pieces he got. He put the cheap earrings in one of my velvet jewelry boxes and gave it to me, saying “gold and diamonds”… when it was a $13 piece of jewelry that came in a paper box. When I asked him why he took my box, he said “I liked it more than the one that came with it”.
Anyway, I didn’t say anything negative about the gifts. I thanked him, put them away, and haven’t touched them since.
I wouldn’t be upset if that’s all he could afford, or if we were struggling financially and he was trying to be considerate, etc. But that’s not the case. His income is in the mid 6 figures, and he is constantly splurging on events, dinners, and family trips (“experiences”).
Part of me feels like I’m being too materialistic, but part of me is just hurt that he isn’t taking me and the things I value into consideration. I can’t help but feel insulted by these gifts.
I’m upset because he never gave me anything as a “push present” or for our 5yr anniversary, and quite honestly, now I’m afraid I will end up with more cheap jewelry sitting in my closet.
Am I focusing on the wrong things? Am I being ungrateful or too materialistic?
Should I get over it, or should I approach him about it? How does one even approach their spouse about something this?
tl;dr My husband is giving me really cheap gifts when he can afford something nice and knows I treasure things I can keep for life. Am I right to be upset, or am I being ungrateful because we have a nice lifestyle otherwise?

Here's what I mean...
Like some people on this sub, I just started drawing. I worked on straight and tapered lines and saw great improvement. (Only 2 days though)
Then I started working on squares, rectangles, triangles, circles, and ellipses. (Only 1 day though). Saw improvement and started getting better.
Then I had a problem I wanted to start moving into 3d and I realized while I can draw these simple basic shapes, I still am not a master of 2d, here's what I mean.
I can't draw a pentagon, octagon, hexagon, heart, star, flower, etc.
I can't look at any 2d image and instantly be able to draw it.
Eg: Vector icons, 2d vector man, Number 2 drawing, Phineas & Ferb, Maple leaf
Sans(not in pixelated form though).
I keep on having this fear that if I start to learn 3d fundamentals and become a great artist(hopefully). I would run into problems due to my lack of not being able to draw every 2d image.
Here's what I mean:
What if I want to sign a heart next to my name or add a heart somewhere in my drawing but can't?
Or I want to draw a star in my art but can't.
Or I want to draw the petal part of a flower but I can't
Or in biology class (when I get to grade 9) we're asked to draw a vector image like person, as shown here: 2d vector man to then use to label some random system in the human body but I can't.
Or in math class were' meant to draw an octagonal-shaped pyramid but I can't
The list goes on and on and on and on, you get the idea.
So I want to know 3 things
Do I need to be a master of anything 2d before I move on to 3d?

• If I do how long should I spend on it before moving on to 3d art? ( I know people might say that depends on you but I want to know a rough estimate of the time I should spend on this if I'm drawing any chance I get, which is a lot) 2 days, 3 days, 1 week, 2 weeks a month.
  
• If I don't and only need to learn squares, rectangles, triangles, circles, and ellipses. how long should I spend on it before moving on to 3d art? ( I know people might say that depends on you but I want to know a rough estimate of the time I should spend on this if I'm drawing any chance I get, which is a lot) 2 days, 3 days, 1 week, 2 weeks a month.
  

Also posted on learnart
Thank you for reading this far
Au revoir :)

I am 23 I currently work as what my job title says a teachers aide, however I cook breakfast, lunch and make snack for the kids as well as do the grocery shopping. After meals are done I sweep up everything that has been thrown on the floor or get up to clean spills or cater to the children who would like more to drink. We all sit together at meal times, I load the dish washer as well and mop and clean the table to then go into the classroom to be head on with the kids. I repeat this 3 times a day. In a way I feel like I’m doing three jobs in one and I’m also getting paid less than everyone. It has really took a toll on my confidence and self. I have been at my center for 2 years and I’m supposed to be getting my CDA but on Fridays was the only time I had to do it and that’s when I would have to go to the store. It felt nice to not have to rush around on the last day of the week since it’s been inmese stress multitasking and making sure the table is set, milk is poured, and the food is set up right in a certain amount of time. 30 minutes to be exact 45 if I leave the classroom 15 minutes early which is nice to have that option to do so . I haven’t exactly felt right about my job since I saw my assistant teacher makes 18$ and I do the same things they do except they “lesson plan” and they don’t really follow through with those anyways. I am now supposed to get a lot of my CDA done in a short amount of time even though I wasn’t truly given the opportunity to do it throughly. I love children and I wanted to be able to give them true structure and for them to be able to be confident and grow. But I’m burnt out, underpaid, and tired. I have a job offer and I think I’m going to take it. I can’t live off of 15.00 an hour for the next year after getting the CDA which is a requirement for me to stay. (Barely 25 cent raise) I guess I just wish that things could have been different. Thanks for reading if you took the time. I apologize for the grammatical mistakes I’m exhausted. There is a lot more that goes into me leaving.

Hi all, This is my first post here. Be kind please.
I’m (35f) separated from my ex (42f) for about a year and a half now. We have 2 amazing boys.
This separation was initiated by me after years of trying to make it work.
Broad issues:

1. My ex was quite the alpha. His aggression had always been a problem. He never physically abused me but throwing things, banging stuff and just being verbally abusive to everyone around him was an everyday experience.
   
2. He always hid his finances from me. I wasn’t aware of the loans he’s taking, how much money he’s making etc. Since I was managing the kids and started a business of my own, I was too busy to pay attention.
   
3. I do believe he loved me but there was no expression. “This is how I am” was his usual response. I was the one trying to communicate, make plans, express for over 10 years.
   
4. I caught him messaging a woman we both knew right after my second child’s birth. It was intense messaging, definitely flirtatious and leading to something. When I caught him, he said it happens, let’s move on. I won’t do this again.
   
5. He’s been nasty to my family and friends. Basically everyone I love.
   
6. He didn’t initiate intimacy. Basically once I had the kids, he wanted me to dedicate myself to them and just saw me as a mother. I ofcourse let myself go but was driven to get back into shape. I’m now the fittest I’ve ever been. Towards the end of the marriage, we were having sex maybe once a year.
   
7. There were major control issues. I wasn’t allowed to go anywhere without sharing my location. He’d accused me of having something going on with everyone - from my gym trainer, to an acquaintance. I never cheated.
   

In the past, whenever things got bad, his usual response was - this is who I am, you knew it before you married me. Let’s just get a divorce if you can’t handle it.
At the end of 2022, I asked for a separation. He said let’s work things out. He put in more effort and intimacy did improve (though I initiated) but this lasted all of 2 months.
2023 Jan, I asked for separation and told him I’m done done. He begged and it was like an overnight switch. He began doing and saying things that I’ve been begging to experience for years. But I was done.
Current scenario:
He’s making getting a divorce impossible, doesn’t want to let go. I also met someone (he’s aware) about 3 months ago (it’s not serious). He still wants me back.
Because of the kids, sometimes I feel like maybe I should go back. But I’m so scared. I don’t think I can love him again. Or atleast the way I used to.
Do men change? What if he breaks my heart again?
I have moved on but I’m still struggling. I don’t know if I’ve made myself clear. Writing this post feels like such a daunting task.
If I haven’t said it already, I am extremely confused.
What should I do?
Also- here are a few flaws I have:

1. I’m a people pleaser and have difficulty communicating needs.
2. I shut down emotionally when there is aggression or violence around me.
3. I do feel like I want to be pampered. I haven’t been for so long.

Another detail- financially he has suffered and I had been taking care of expenses. In terms of stability, I have an upper hand when it comes to finances at this point.
I sometimes think he wants me because I have the financial standing too.
Sorry for the long post.

Let me preface this with I really do love my nanny family, they have helped me so much and I’ve been with them for three years. But, these kinds of things make nannying hard.
The parents have a pretty “typical” gender roles in their family. Mom organizes most things and kids schedules, and Dad works more so I never really communicate with him for scheduling but also have a good relationship with him in person. She was actually on top of stuff for the month of May and let me know in April (im totally OK for her to just let me know kind of when she needs, as it works for me) when she needed me for May. It turned out to be a lot of dates and because I have 2 jobs - one with a company, those dates are set aside and I have to get my shift covered if I can’t/don’t want to work.
She asked me to do a bunch of dates in May, which I was looking forward to doing because it pays more than my company job and I was pretty confident that I could get most of my shifts covered because a lot of folks are available now because there are university for summer break. I told her I’d let her know and see if I can get them covered, which I did for almost all my shifts. She was happy about that and so was I because it meant I could get paid more and do a job that I actually love it bit more, and I was excited to spend more time with my nanny kids.
Fast forward two weeks and I text their dad to make sure I’m picking up in a few days because I knew she was out of town (thank god I did) and he was like no sorry don’t need you, MB name didn’t tell me you were picking up so I am all good. Okay, I am a bit annoyed because I got that shift time covered but hey I’m burnt out I could use an afternoon. I send a follow up text to her to PLEASE confirm all dates w DB so that I don’t have times I’ve scheduled but I’m not actually working. Fast forward to this week and she calls and says, oh we are actually also good for coverage for another shift as well, DB will pick up. So now I’m annoyed. I am going to send a text and say I need to know my hours for sure and also ask for another day to make up those hours. I’ve lost hours at both jobs because of it. Anyways, vent over.

With all the talk about the Selena situation, people are, of course bringing up the last messy UCLA situation, Jeffreygate. There are people who have declared undying hate for LSU/Jay Clark/LSU AD because of it.
For context when I say this- I'm Black.
Yes, I think Alexis did unacceptable things, and was given the benefit of being a young white woman, who "just has some learning to do" and "didn't mean any harm." That part is BS. But honestly, sometimes the math doesn't math, with people calling for her head. Again, I'm not saying she didn't do anything wrong. She did. But then she went to a team where Hailey Bryant, Kiya Johnston are superstars, and Kai Rivers is a vocal leader, not to mention the other WOC on the team.
LSU is so much about team culture and supporting each other. Their former volunteer coach Ashleigh Clare Kearny Thigpin is now the biggest-wig in charge of EDI stuff at LSU (whatever that looks like in Baton Rouge.)
What I'm saying is, there is no way LSU is going to f with someone who continues to cause trouble in the team wirh her racist views. And who knows- maybe she's actually changed or maybe she knows to keep her mouth shut now, but I cannot see LSU gymnastics harboring anyone who shows a consistent refusal to learn about race issues. Something changed there, and we weren't privy to it.
My point in all of this is, at the time, people practically wanted to burn Alexis at the stake for what she said and did, but for me, the fact that she seems to be thriving on the LSU team suggests that there's a lot of nuance there that we the gymternet are not privy to. And I believe the same is true, and will continue to be true for the Selena Harris situation. There is nuance here, and we will probably never know the whole truth.

My mother was taken from me in late February from early onset Alzheimer’s at only 59 years old. It was two years of the most grueling, heart wrenching experience of my life. Everyone in my family was raised Catholic, but me and my siblings dropped it going into early adulthood. My mom remained Catholic and never judged us for thinking differently or when we stopped going to Church, as she was just absolutely full of love and support of us no matter what. I felt lucky to have her.
Her service was very Catholic and was held in the church that she grew up going to. The church gave us and my dad kind of a hard time with their rules because my mom was cremated and we intended to scatter some of her ashes, which is not allowed in Catholicism, so her service was more of a traditional Mass, rather than a strict funeral service.
But something that I noticed as we were going through the Gospel and saying all these things about how much we love god, I couldn’t bring myself to say anything. Not even fake it. I was sitting there and wondering why I was praising god at the literal service of my mom that was taken by an insidious disease that shouldn’t exist to begin with, at a way too young age. What am I thanking him for? How could I be expected to not absolutely hate a god that would allow that to happen?
I try not to be one of those people that talks down to others who go to church. I literally do not care what other people believe in. And I don’t consider myself a spiteful person, but I feel absolutely spiteful of this. I don’t want to go through life feeling my blood pressure rise at the mere thought of someone talking about a loving god, or essentially anything Catholic. I want to use that energy to carry on my mom’s life. I hardly think I’m the first person to experience this, but if you have, you’re not alone.

A police officer received a call to help another officer, who he had known for many years. The call was designated as "suspicious circumstance."
The call was from a son who said that when he went to check on his mom at her old farmhouse, he had heard noises from downstairs in the basement.
It took the officer about 15 minutes to get out to this old farmhouse outside of town. It was yellow stucco and very old. He could see the old knob and tubing wiring on the outside of the house.
There is an upset old woman on the porch, the mom, and then a younger adult male standing next to her, the son, and then his fellow police officer standing next to them.
He goes up to them and gets all the information. When the son got to his mom's farmhouse to check on his mom, while he was talking to his mom on the main floor, he heard a noise in the basement like something being dropped. He dismissed it as perhaps an animal.
However, then there were more noises of things moving around and then he also started hearing voices.
The son said he thinks maybe someone is living down there taking advantage of his mom. He says the basement is unlivable as it has a dirt floor and no electricity.
The mom is upset. She said she didn't want the son to go down in the basement. And now, the mom didn't want the police officers to go down in the basement either.
So, he asks her why she doesn't want them to go down there. She says, "Because the others are down there."
And he asks her what she means by that. She says "The others were here long before me and they will be here long after me."
He says he understands but that they need to go check the basement. The mom says nicely "You are both good boys. Don't go down there."
Meanwhile, the officer sees that the fellow officer has a very scared look on his face. This fellow police officer has helped the police officer who is calling into the show many many times. The intuition from him has saved both of them in many situations. So, this guy trusts him a lot. He pulls him to the side and says "What's going on here?" The fellow police officer says "There is a very dark fog around this house."
The two police officers decide to go clear the basement with their weapons drawn. They let dispatch know they are going to clear the basement and then they make their way into the old house.
They go through the front door and enter an entryway. There is a kitchen to the left. There are two double doors to a living room on the right. They go through the kitchen and then through a small hallway towards the garage where there are steps down to the basement.
They open the basement door and start going down the steps. The steps are very steep and narrow like steps on a boat. There is no electricity downstairs. He only has the light on his gun. He said every single inch of his exposed skin felt like it was under assault from a thickness in the air.
They get downstairs and to the left are a bunch of old boilers. First a wood fire one, then an oil fire one, and then an updated furnace. To the left are steep stairs that go back outside through a bulkhead entrance (like the wizard of oz -- those basement doors that are flat in the ground).
And, in between the boilers and that bulkhead stair is a door to a back room inside the basement. And they focus on opening up that door.
The fellow officer opens the door and he goes inside. The room is filled with old wooden items and some boxes. There is nothing for anyone to hide behind. In the center of the room near the back is an old rocking horse. The white paint has been chipping and the hair on the horse has faded severely.
They both stand there looking at the rocking horse. He says he was drawn to the rocking horse in a very weird way.
Then he hears his radio as dispatch is calling. Dispatch says "Security check" as in "Are you guys ok?" He answers back that they are ok and dispatch says "What is taking you so long." He thinks this is very odd since usually dispatch does not interrupt you when you are clearing a house like that as they know you are highly focused.
He looks over to his fellow officer and he is staring at that rocking horse. His eyes are glossed over in a daze. He shakes his fellow officer and his fellow officer snaps out of it. They make their way back upstairs. They both talk in the kitchen that they are going to have to talk about this with each other after they leave the house to get their bearings back.
They go back out on the porch. The old woman has a smirk on her face. She says "Didn't feel good did it? You should have listened shouldn't you?"
He gets back in his vehicle and he asks dispatch why they interrupted him. Dispatch says he was gone too long. He says he wasn't gone long. Dispatch says he was gone for 10 minutes. He says he was not gone for 10 minutes. He says he was gone for about 2 minutes before they interrupted him.
There are more calls that come in and they move on to those.
However, later, back at the police station, they review the police body camera. Sure enough, once they get down into that room with the rocking horse, both he and the fellow officer freeze for 7 minutes looking at that rocking horse. They do not move. They do not speak. You can hear them both breathing for 7 minutes on the video. The only reason they snap out of it is because dispatch interrupts them on the radio. They both stood looking at that rocking horse for 7 minutes without realizing it.

Please excuse my rant, I had to deal with my 15 month old niece screaming for 30-40 mins on my own (even though my Ndad was also home) before her dad got off work. Amazed I was able to stay calm but I guess that one of the reasons I was chosen to care for her while her parents work. Aside from the fact that I'm the only family member able to (yes I still get told to go find a job). *God I hope I am doing this generational trauma shield thing correctly*
Oh sure, when your granddaughter that you claim to love so much is at her witching hour that's the perfect time to "have" to repaint a bench Ndad!
Also, no Nmom 30 mins of watching the same granddaughter that you love so much in the morning does not equal an hour!
Of course both Nparents play victim/"she thinks she gets to boss us around."

21+ ! !
please message me with more than "hi, how are you?" + do not chat message me, send me a DM! it's so much easier for me since i use the app on my phone.
just your local girlfriend stealing, alternative, bisexual here. 👋 but you know what? let's set that aside for now (your girlfriend is safe for the moment) because i'm looking for friends that are as good to me as i am to others, which is apparently *harder than it should be. i am a genuinely kind, loving person even if my face says otherwise. oops. i have a severe case of resting sad face, so sorry.
i'm smitten with people who are weird but not weird enough to make others uncomfy, or unable to enjoy the weirdness, ya know? i know you know. i like people who are into things that others mostly aren't: tarot, astrology, deep conversations, things like that. i might not actively be participating in said things but i like hearing the perspective of people who are! my friends always joke that i'm the person people say "i can fix her!" about but uh, i'm awesome. i don't need fixed. ✨i will admit though, i hesitate about people a lot because while i do want a best friend -- mine have scorned me, so i need someone patient with me and understanding of that, please. please. i adore social connections but i do come with a social battery and it needs refilled. me needing that time does not negate the connection i have built with you and am nurturing with you.
i will genuinely offer you diamonds in the form of friendship, just reciprocate it. i will offer you the safest, most non-judgement free zone you can imagine, you are always - always, safe with me. i just ask that you are a good, kind, compassionate friend to me. you can literally tell me anything in the world and if it isn't hurting anyone else, i will listen without judgment. i promise you. i'll also send you spotify songs that i really like, so hi. hello.
on to the fun tingz (and the stuff that will hopefully bring you in),
i'm watching my first ever anime, like ever and no we're not going to talk about my real first ever anime because it might've been a live action and it might've been death note and maybe i enjoyed it (holy crap, sueeeee me) but i have a few on my list to watch but i got pressured into this one, so far so good! let's talk about it, ask me which one it is! it's a pretty popular one lol. maybe you can guess it! either way, i'm also into horror shows/movies. i'm not really into the gory ones anymore, nor the emotional horror so i'll pass. my heart strings are saying noOoO thanks. i love watching movies with friends and even anthology shows like cabinet of curiosities, dark mirror, etc etc. i don't mind anything else! hit me up. i'll tell you some stuff i like(d)
currently, iiiiii am a graphic design major with a knack for not drawing. i mean, i guess i do like pixel art. if you can give me something small to draw in pixel art form, i will attempt it (if you give me something large, i'll send you doo doo in the mail) but honestly, i am still learning and trying new things everyday 💤 however, i'm in the process of changing majors to cybersecurity! which starts in June, so wish ya girl luck 💅
i am a gamer, so come game with me! i don't play league, my mental health is terrible enough, thank you. i also don't play wow, my attention span could never. i do, however, play valorant because i don't like myself that much. i got you there, didn't i? i play a few other things: CS, starting to get into overwatch 2 (please play this with me and if you ask me my rank, i'll cry), party animals, pummel party (can we please?) etc. i tend to hang out in valorant land though, i won't lie. i do not take it seriously and honestly, nor should you.. nerd.
i am ✨sPiCy✨so if that bothers you, i am sorry. i, again, am a genuinely kind person but i do have a snarkiness to me that is meant to be a slight "i love you" + dash of bully. ❤

Bear with me for a little while I lay it all out :)
Car: Ford Falcon XT
Year: 2010
Engine: 6 Cylinder LPG Only
Automatic Transmission
So we’ve been driving this car for over a year, an ex-taxi. Have maintained its service decently, KMs are around 250,000 which isn’t too crazy for a Ford. I’ll list various problems in chronological order of us spotting them to pain the picture as best as possible.
Issue 1: The whole time we’ve had it there’s been a notification on the dash when the keys are initially put in saying “Transmission Not In Park” despite it being in Park.
Issue 2: Occasionally over the past year the gear switches would be pretty rough at random times. For example, I’d be on the freeway and I’ll speed up a little (say to get from 80kmh to 100kmh) and I would feel underneath me a bump, like a tectonic shift.
Issue 3: Only the last two months, some mornings it takes a few failed attempts to even start the car. Basically the longer it stays cold the harder it is to start, even when fresh off a service.
Issue 4: Yesterday, the accelerator would randomly stop working at stop lights. If I was on a slight incline it felt slightly dangerous because I’d need to roll a little first while being very easy on the accelerator. Reason being, if I pushed it too hard it wouldn’t move gears at all. I’d see the RPM meter at 4000 with zero actual acceleration. You hear the motor and everything but it’s as if the gear wasn’t connecting. This phenomenon would only occur for 2-5 seconds but you’d still have to be careful in the aftermath because it was kind of a mission to slowly get it to 60kmh, while the rest of the traffic is driving smoothly. Good thing I was working overnight and the roads were empty on my travels.
Issue 5: this morning the car refuses to start. We arranged yesterday to take it to a mechanic but it means nothing if it won’t leave the driveway. I’ve tried starting in neutral and also keeping the brake pedal way down and neither has made it work.
Each issue compounded into the other and now they’re all simultaneously present. Does anyone have any information on what this all is. I have a feeling it’s all one connected issue. Last service was done a month or so ago, there have never been any warning lights and all meters (engine temp for example) have been checking out.

So I have actually been thinking about this for a couple weeks, since I saw a post asking what a good Slytherin would look like, and what good qualities they would have. (I can't find the post here though so it may have been in HPfanfiction).
A little bit later I was once more reading The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe and I realized that Edmund, (post Aslan of course) is the perfect fit for a good Slytherin. He is a good man, who loves his friends and fights bravely for the People of Narnia, but is also shown to be very clever and shrewd. In the Battle of Beruna it was Edmund who broke the White Witch's wand to stop her from turning the Narnian army to stone, it was Edmund who figures out that Cair Paravel was attacked, and it Edmund who is described as the wisest of the four.
I guess now as to why I think he would be in Slytherin specifically, as opposed to Gryffindor or Ravenclaw. I do not believe he would be in Gryffindor because while he is brave, it is not his defining characteristic, and most of the events he is described as leading are ones in which it is his wit that is expressed.
My reason he isn't in Ravenclaw are a little different. Everything he does could also conceivably be Ravenclaw traits, but the thing I believe makes him Slytherin instead is that he, while being an exceptional man, is simultaneously a rather cold, logic driven one. In Prince Caspian, during Peter's duel with Miraz, Edmund advises Peter not to be chivalrous, and to strike and kill Miraz. Peter of course doesn't, but the reader is led to believe that if it had been Edmund, he would have killed him with little hesitation, which screams Slytherin to me.
That is just my two cents. I do not know how much the fan base for Narnia and Harry Potter overlap so I don't know how much discussion we can have but I am excited to hear the communities thoughts on this.

I am scared I’ll get judged because this truth involves some flaws on my part as well. TLDR my life is pretty amazing but I’m scared I’ll do something stupid because I don’t think it’s fair that this happened.
Currently, we have a very great home life with 3 amazing children, a great friendship and relationship (minus the intimacy of me not telling him things like this), and he is one of the best men I know, seriously. He has all the traits of a husband you would look for.
Which is why it’s so hard for me to also acknowledge the feelings as I got close to the age he was when he knew me. We met through work, we were friends, he perused me, he seemed pretty sure about me and I was tired of trying to destroy my own life and decided to give him a chance. I was 18 and I know how this sounds as well. We have also talked about this part and I believe that he genuinely was not mature enough at the time to understand what was happening.
Very shortly after, we got pregnant, which I was 100% sure I was not going to go through with. His family was very anti abortion. So I guess for him I decided to go through with it. It was my choice at the end of the day, and I was way more likely to please others with my decisions than I am now.
I resigned myself to most likely getting hurt and ending up as a broke teenage mom. Only that didn’t happen. We had our challenges, but we broke through, and he always treated me well. We both matured a lot as people. We were able to start a life with a house and a family.
We now have a very busy and successful life which I’m proud of, we have erased toxic familial patterns and our kids are so loved. Everything is going pretty well. I am feeling the effects of what life can look like when you keep choosing your partner in a marriage. We’ve continued to grow together, and I would say he is a good match for me as we both grow intellectually, physically, etc.

I reached the age where I can see 18 year old me from a new perspective. I have new thoughts. How could you think this would’ve been best for me? Being with one man my entire adult life. Not leaving my hometown. Not having experiences. Being a young mom and immediately losing my body as I knew it, and never being able to go back to not being needed.
I think about 18 year old men now. Could I think they’re smart, mature, and possibly love one? Sure. But could I ask them to commit to me with absolutely no life experience? Could I ask them to become a father at that age? I would never let that happen.
Maybe some of this is also me projecting, because I haven’t been the mother I expected, because I was not ready in any way.
Here’s the thing. It’s happened. I reached a place where I got curious. I got curious about other men. Other experiences. I have not acted on that curiousity, but I blamed myself and I felt very guilty for not appreciating this life I’ve built.
It feels very important to explore that side of me, but equally important to protect this family life that I know most people are not lucky enough to have (not just having a family, but the positive environment we have built in our home.)
We’ve had long conversations about pieces of this, the sexual aspect, the resentment to him because we had a baby, the need for me to be able to have more freedom and finding myself than most. In some ways, it’s helped.
I’ve started to use other men and the fantasy of cheating as a way to get me through life.
I’m not sure if what I want is another relationship. Or sex. Or to experience being single (for the purpose of getting to know myself alone). It’s not just about sex, but also the freedom to do things that you don’t do when you’re married or have kids.
It seems obvious in some ways that I need to be alone. It seems obvious in other ways that I have such an amazing opportunity to just enjoy the life I’ve created, and not take for granted how rare this is. Getting divorced can mean disrupting kids, step parents, apartments, new schools, and no longer having my partner who I love very much.
Another obvious answer is to talk to him. We have talked many times, and I know that while he will be okay with just about anything to make a relationship work, sex and relationships with other men are off the table. I am aware that throwing this all away and going out in the dating world will not be fun and exciting for very long at all.
Cheating has become a fantasy middle ground that I know is a horrible solution. But I’m scared I’ll get there at some point.

So, this is going to be long because context is important. Me and my ex started dating almost 3 years ago and after 2 years and 8 months in the relationship we broke up. During this, we had no problems for over a year and a half and then had some communication issues some of it catalysed by her controlling parents. They were straight up racist after they found out that I was not of the same nationality as them, and without even meeting m, they insinuated to not be in the relationship subliminally or keep her options open.
For context, they are Asian parents who were non-confrontational her whole life and a lot of that showed in her character, She never ever wanted to communicate through a problem, always hung up, always got mad when I brought something up that needed talking about. Her parents are the type to immediately tell her to read the bible if they see her distressed without offering any solace. They don't like when she cried and stuff like that.
I loved her a lot. I went above and beyond for her as per her own confession, no one else had done before. For the first year, I was appreciated for always communicating and just always being straight up with everything. The best way to describe how I was as a bf is that I had boundaries but I respected those same boundaries myself and also I was VERY VERY reassuring of the security of our relationship and I went above and beyond AS MUCH as I could and I really mean that. I was very loving, all I asked was to be reassured as well.
For most of our relationship we were long distance, as we started our relationship in person and I had to go to Uni in another country. I would visit twice a year for a month at a time during which I hung out with her all the time (4-5 times a week). And even in long distance, I structured my schedule and she did as well for the most part to make sure we spent 4 hours + every single day talking and we GENUINELY enjoyed each other's company a lot. For the duration of our relationship we spoke for hours every single day. Chemistry wise, it was undeniable.
Fast forward, So then after my last visit, I noticed she was distant, constantly expressing some sort of negative feelings towards me. I could tell she was distancing and I dealt with that even with support because I asked her why she was feeling a bit distant, she kept saying 'idk' and so I just offered support as she was having exam stress at the time too. To this day I don't know why she distanced. And then finally as she was bringing up stuff that 'she wished could be different' which were all out of my control, I asked her to call it and break up if she valued these things that much, which could be solved all with time, mind you. One was the distance, which weirdly wasn't a problem before and if anything I only had 1 year of uni left. It felt like she was trying to throw reasons like a dart to a wall to see what sticks. And at this point, if we broke up, it would be cordial.
About a month later, we finally broke up while I was back abroad studying, after a fight where she threatened to break up with me and I got sick of her expressing this feeling of not giving a shit about me or us so I said something I shouldn't have and that was it. She called it.
This was all to build up the fact that now she is actively chasing guys 2-3 months later after I regrettably checked her socials (the ones I haven't been blocked on) one way or another I come across it (definitely because I go looking) - Making playlists for a guy subtitled with 'Don't know how else I can make it more obvious' after she blocked me on spotify and this one guy followed her on there. She later changed that playlist name to 'Maybe someday' and then made the playlist private or deleted it. Recently, she tweeted on her public rant page that no one followed other than me when I was with her, after she blocked me on there as well but I had notifs on so I guess it bugged and I could still see it. The tweet read 'I just...want to be appreciated. I JUST WANT TO BE APPRECIATED!!!! I'm so hilarious, why doesn't anyone wanna date me'. She has also never been single for more than 8 months or so since she started dating, has had two exes before me.
Bottomline is, if she came back I would NEVER get back with her. I feel disgusted that I dated a girl like her. I feel like I was lied to about who I was dating - a funny, loving, religious god-fearing woman who had her priorities straight. I feel very very confused that she's like this now and so soon. We did everything together even after our distance, she wouldn't even be able to go to sleep without me being there for her. And now, she pretends I never existed. I know it's normal for her to pretend that I don't exist now, but to pretend I NEVER existed and we never went through what we did? That blows my mind. I know I have to accept it. How do I deal with not having the self control to keep checking some of her socials and stuff or How do I build self control. Like just how do I go about this breakup because another massive detail is that I am studying abroad in a place where it is genuinely impossible to make good quality friends (Berlin, no hate just that the people here are not my type of people) so I am alone with my thoughts a lot. I am trying to get close to God but I keep thinking about all of the stuff that has happened. I don't have the friends back home that would help me just distract myself. And I don't think dating or talking to girls is the answer either? I have hobbies but that doesn't help much I guess. How do I stop thinking about her and deal with this?

hi m29 my partner f23 together almost 2 1/2 years. The first half of the relationship was a dream come true for both of us we were perfect for each other felt like we knew each other for eons never fought not once loved each other unconditionally but i knew eventually it would have to happen thats apart of life and then last year in july my 6 year old nephew contracts DIPG which is a uncureable brain cancer that only affects children and he left this world 3 and a half months later I was shook to the core life itself felt very odd and not real and she just told me 2 months agos about how I was handling the situation was hurting her and how she felt unloved and pushed away which i didn't realize how bad it was affecting her until she told me, i was consumed by grief went to work came home and tried to feel something good but that feeling never came i couldn't talk about it because it just hurt more and more when i spoke about him dying and his last months on this earth i didn't know what to do about so i shut everyone out stopped talking stopped hanging out with friends and secluded myself in my home and in my room for the entire time and i tried my hardest to not show any weakness because thats what i was told to do i was told to be strong for everyone for my sisters and my girl so i got so strong i was a steel door not letting anyone in without realizing and i thought during the whole entire time we were okay as ateam not great just okay because who can be great while dealing with the worst thing that could ever happen to a person but i thought we were fine and time would heal our wounds and we could be great again but i guess not because she left this past sunday and said she needed space because even though i was getting better she still resented me for how i was during the process and wasn't sure if she loved me anymore and it doesn't make sense for someone to tell you false promises like "no matter how bad things get i will still be by your side and love you" then turn around and leave after you gave it your all to try to mend her feelings about you grief is weird and when a person finally sees you for who you are the great and the worst and the worst was me being at my lowest mentally i got drunk twice the entire time i never raised my voice to her and i feel helpless because i know she is the right person for me in my heart i know in my mind i know i want to give her space but i can't help but think that shes just running away because life got hard and she doesn't know how to process it but neither do i to a extent but our upbringings were completely different mine was based on trauma and sorrow and hers was not and i just want her to understand that life isn't always going to be hard and you don't have to runaway when it gets tough especially runaway from the ones you swore to adore and cherish for life

Hi all!
As the title states my goats a picky eater when it comes to hay. We’ve been feeding him Timothee hay cubes since December as we switched him from sweet feed due to the vet saying he had an increased risk of urinary calculi. He’s been loving it, never had a problem until the other day we noticed his food was different (more dry than the last, not as green) I thought we were gonna have any problems but he thought different.
He screamed yesterday for five hours and it’s not a small scream either, his screams are loud and very very obnoxious. I feel so bad for my neighbors! I tried everything, wetting his food, giving him regular hay, and even hay pellets instead of cubes but nothing worked he refused to eat it! (He’s also very dramatic and throws tantrums when he doesn’t get what he wants) He still had a very healthy appetite as he grazed on banana and orange tree leaves as he usually does but he wouldn’t eat his hay.
Finally my other half came home and simply put salt in his hay, we had a salt block for him but he licked it all gone and we’re waiting for more to come in (we live in Hawaii) He finally ate it and I filled up his feeder three times this morning. I’m just trying to figure out if there’s a better option than salt to add to the hay cubes that would get him to eat it?