Im alone on my birthday. I never thought it would be this lonely. It is currently 4:00am and I just turned 21 today and i haven’t really accomplished any important milestones yet and the existential dread keeps creeping up in my thoughts. I cant stop ruminating on my death and what could have been with my past relationships. I have been in and out of work, getting fired, getting into decent jobs that paid commission in sales but i could never hold onto a job. I still live with my parents. I pay for things when i can like groceries and help out with rent but at the moment im unemployed trying to look for a job. I actually have a interview later today at 9 am. Im just exhausted to work and not own anything. I just feel frustrated. I used to work two jobs everyday. I dont know where my life is headed. Im in constant paranoia and fear. My anxiety never stops. I currently have a girlfriend and i also helped her pay for her car note and insurance. Nobody is coming to help me. Is this what life is to be a man? I just want security. I was cheated on by this current gf and i forgave her. My thoughts are all over the place. All this anger is overwhelming all this pain i have all this regret. Her family tells her to look for a better looking and more responsible man. I used to have a car that i bought with my own money but my father sold it. I havent ate in a while either im just sitting in bed rotting in my birthday. Hopefully it gets better i guess. But ima just past the time watching black pill and try to ground myself to reality.

hey, i (f19) am really panicking and worried, so i'm sorry in advance if this is chaotic.
the whole relationship was an online discord relationship
we met in oct '23 and got together a month later 4 months later i slowly lost my feelings, i was going through a really tough time i talked to him, communicated and we thought that maybe some time would fix the problem... but it got worse and i had no romantical feelings for him left i figured that it might be better if we broke up, since staying in a relationship with someone who doesn't love love you anymore, is just unfair. he was going through a terrible time, he was really clingy and i tried to support and comfort him as much as i could. we kept calling and talking and texting, there were so many night where i just fell asleep on the call cuz i was so exhausted from crying and feeling so shit about everything
he claimed that i was his everything, his first and only love etc etc and i felt really bad and guilty...i feel like i had no other choice than breaking up and even distancing myself from him, because he kept repeating how it's all my fault and i just didnt feel ok anymore. i've never felt so shitty and bad in my life before.
well 2 months later, everything got worse. since i was single, i had more time to spend with my friends, and take care of the friendships that i neglected during the relationship. i played with friends, called with them, tried distracting myself from the mess. my ex didnt like that idea, he kept on saying i was cheating (which i cant even if I wanted to, since we werent together during that time), he kept saying im trying to replace him, that i started ignoring him etc etc he kept assuming things and believed them, none of his statements were true, but since he thought they are he hurt himself more and more with it and said that i'm the one hurting him. he kept on lashing out on me, got angry whenever i spent time with someone else and not him, threatened me and i was just scared. the anger he had made me so anxious, that i neither wanted to call nor play with him
a few days ago it was really terrible. i played with a friend again, just trying to have a good time and he stalked me and saw that i was playing. he texted me, spam called me over 60 times in total on 3 different apps and then he kept on assuming different things, insulted me, said terrible shitty things and i honestly just didnt reply at that point. i was hurt, didnt understand what my mistake was.
we didnt talk or text for a whole day since one of his messages were "dont ever text me again bitch" and i just didnt wanna message first after being disrespected like that
a day later he texted, saying he missed me and that he was mad and it's all his fault i told him how shit i felt that night, how anxious i was out of a sudden he felt really bad he said bad things about himself, said stuff like "its all my fault/i dont deserve love/i dont wanna live/i deserve death" i told him to stop saying things like that
a night later he felt really bad, he sounded weak in the voice messages he sent
then he put "its really high up here and i think about taking the last step" in his status
when i saw that i told him to come and calm down, he said it doesnt make sense anymore and told me to stay safe after that he went offline and didnt text again. this was 2 days ago.
yesterday a friend of ours texted me, saying that my ex said good bye to him and that he will end it
since then we both dont know where he is, what happened, no one knows and i'm just really worried and scared that he really did it my friend says he's trying to get attention, since it was a month online relationship and out of religious reasons.
is it my fault? did i do something wrong? can something happen to me? idk how to deal with this, if he really killwd himself... how will i know? im scared

Part two has a brief introduction to each of the characters!

1. Zephyr Stormrider sails the seas of time, seeking to unravel the mysteries of his temporal powers and rewrite the course of history to save his lost love.
   
2. Luna Emberheart, an empathic astronomer, embarks on a cosmic quest to prevent an otherworldly catastrophe, using her celestial connections to guide her.
   
3. Orion Frostblade, a silent warrior with time-manipulating abilities, must navigate a frozen world to prevent an ancient evil from shrouding the universe in eternal ice.
   
4. Seraphina Moonshadow, a shape-shifting bard, undertakes a musical odyssey to restore balance to a realm torn apart by the disharmony of warring factions.
   
5. Ignatius Thunderhoof, the steampunk centaur engineer, races against time to thwart a mechanical uprising fueled by a corrupt inventor's dark ambitions.
   
6. Velvet Whisper, the rogue librarian, dives into the realms of literature to mend the fabric of reality, unraveling a plot that threatens to consume the world.
   
7. Octavia Quicksilver, a clockwork automaton detective, unravels a city-wide conspiracy while utilizing her retractable tools and uncanny deduction skills.
   
8. Nebula Dancer, the cosmic ballet dancer, strives to restore cosmic balance disrupted by celestial turmoil, using her mesmerizing dances to weave reality.
   
9. Magnus Ironweaver, a blacksmith of emotions, forges weapons imbued with feelings to forge alliances and challenge the oppressive rulers of a divided realm.
   
10. Aurora Flux, the reality-bending painter, battles through alternate dimensions spawned by her own creations, seeking to mend the tears in the fabric of existence.
    
11. Silas Shadowstep, the shadowy rogue, embarks on a journey to reclaim his stolen identity, navigating the shadows to unveil a conspiracy that spans dimensions.
    
12. Tesla Starwhisper, the electrically charged astronomer, endeavors to harness the power of the Northern Lights to prevent an impending cosmic catastrophe.
    
13. Lyra Songbird, the singer with healing melodies, embarks on a musical pilgrimage to mend the hearts of a broken kingdom and bring about lasting harmony.
    
14. Nimbus Skyweaver, the skydiving instructor, soars through the clouds to uncover the truth behind a mysterious airborne phenomena threatening the world.
    
15. Ember Swiftstrike, the fire-controlling martial artist, embraces her flames to face a dark force threatening to engulf the world in an eternal blaze.
    
16. Cogsworth Gearhart, the clockwork butler, embarks on a whimsical adventure to recover stolen artifacts from his pocket dimension, preventing chaos.
    
17. Isadora Dreamweaver, the dream architect, navigates the dream realm to unravel a plot that blurs the lines between reality and the fantastical.
    
18. Galadriel Stormcaller, the elven archer, leads a rebellion against tyrannical forces using her enchanted arrows to manipulate the elements.
    
19. Tiberius Stoneheart, the geokinetic geologist, explores the depths of the earth to prevent a cataclysmic eruption that could devastate the surface world.
    
20. Selene Nightshade, the necromancer florist, must balance the delicate harmony between life and death to stop a malevolent force that threatens the natural order.
    
21. Nimbus Thunderpaws, the weather-controlling cat, joins forces with a group of unlikely heroes to prevent a feline-centric apocalypse.
    
22. Vesper Whisperwind, the psychic detective, uses her unique abilities to solve a series of cryptic mysteries plaguing her city.
    
23. Percival Moonstrider, the time-traveling knight, battles across eras to mend the fabric of time, preventing reality from tearing apart at the seams.
    
24. Mystique Mirage, the illusionist chef, whips up culinary wonders to save her culinary kingdom from a reality-warping culinary catastrophe.
    
25. Zara Silverflame, the silver-tongued diplomat, navigates political intrigue and manipulates emotions to prevent a war that could consume the known world.
    
26. Oberon Frostwhisper, the winter spirit, faces an existential threat to his realm, battling to protect the delicate balance between the seasons.
    
27. Harmony Sunburst, the sound-based healer, embarks on a quest to restore a mystical sound crystal that maintains the harmony of her realm.
    
28. Draven Nightengale, the cursed storyteller, must confront the living embodiments of his tales gone awry to prevent a storybook apocalypse.
    
29. Astrid Starshaper, the cosmic cartographer, unravels a cosmic conspiracy as she charts the unexplored realms between the stars.
    
30. Blaze Shadowblade, the dual-wielding rogue, seeks redemption for his dark past by thwarting a shadowy organization's plan to plunge the world into chaos.
    
31. Iris Sparkleweaver, the crystal sculptor, crafts living sculptures to aid her in a quest to restore balance to a world plagued by magical disturbances.
    
32. Orion Mistwalker, the fog-controlling ninja, must navigate treacherous political landscapes and deadly mist-covered terrains to save his homeland.
    
33. Solaris Swiftwing, the winged courier, races against time to deliver a crucial message that could prevent a celestial catastrophe.
    
34. Seraphic Gearspring, the clockwork alchemist, must concoct an elixir to reverse a curse that threatens to turn her city into a steampunk nightmare.
    
35. Luna Silverthorn, the celestial archer, embarks on an epic journey to retrieve stolen starlight and prevent the world from falling into eternal darkness.
    
36. Tesla Thunderstrike, the lightning-wielding mechanic, builds a coalition of rebels to overthrow a tyrannical ruler exploiting the power of electricity.
    
37. Nyx Nightshade, the shadowy enchantress, weaves a web of shadows to uncover a conspiracy that spans both the mortal and magical realms.
    
38. Aegis Stormforge, the blacksmith with protective energy shields, leads a rebellion against an oppressive empire using his formidable creations.
    
39. Vortex Dreamwalker, the dream explorer, delves into the nightmares of a haunted city to banish a malevolent entity that feeds on fear.
    
40. Ragnar Frostbeard, the Viking with ice manipulation powers, embarks on a journey to reclaim his ancestral lands from a fire-wielding usurper.
    
41. Sylph Swiftsong, the wind-controlling minstrel, must confront a malevolent force that seeks to unleash destructive storms upon the world.
    
42. Ember Ironheart, the fire-forged golem, seeks to understand her origins and prevent a war between elemental forces that could consume the world.
    
43. Astral Serpentara, the cosmic serpent, slithers across dimensions to confront an ancient evil threatening to unravel the fabric of reality.
    
44. Nocturna Whisperwind, the night-loving ranger, defends her enchanted forest from an encroaching darkness that threatens to consume all.
    
45. Celestia Stardancer, the balletic star entity, dances across galaxies to restore cosmic harmony disrupted by celestial discord.
    
46. Ignis Flamestrider, the lava-walking explorer, traverses treacherous volcanic landscapes to uncover a plot to unleash molten chaos upon the world.
    
47. Silvanus Thornheart, the plant-controlling druid, battles against deforestation and industrial expansion to protect the sacred balance of nature.
    
48. Stormbringer, the airship captain, sails through stormy skies to uncover the truth behind a mysterious airborne anomaly threatening the
    

As we all know, open centers are the lessons we need to learn in life and our potential for wisdom, but Ra also said once "the colored part is the student and the white part is the school".
Does this mean that I should work on and learn from open CHANNELS too?
I have a personality 64-47 and no active gates on the 63-4. Keeping in mind that the 63-4 is not me, should I work on its use like I do with my completely open spleen and try to gain wisdom from it, since the 64-47 works at full speed all the time anyway?
2/5 Ego Manifestor PLL DLL RAX Vessel of Love

Okay, first things first. I know that it’s their body and money, so it’s their rules. I’m not here to judge nor condemn plastic surgery or people who undergo the procedure. And of course, I know na hindi naman lahat ng nag-uundergo ng surgery ay may balak magkaanak o may anak.
But I just couldn’t help but wonder kung anong magiging impact nito sa anak nila kung meron man. Supposing namana nung anak yung features na “pinaayos” nung parent. I’m talking about drastic change ha, hindi yung “enhancement” lang.
I know it would all boil down to parenting. Pero parang imposibleng walang maging negative effect sa bata kung makita niyang iba yung itsura niya sa magulang niya. Nakakalungkot lang din isipin how this influencer culture has placed so much importance on physical appearance. It’s a culture that promotes body positivity, self-acceptance, and self-love, yet it’s also the same culture that promotes cosmetic enhancements and surgeries for empowerment. Where do you even draw the line na ba?
Ayun, wala lang, random thought lang lately, since dumarami na yung nagiging vocal about undergoing plastic surgery.

Kadillac Kirk had been a good friend of mine for several years. I had met him through friends from The Spring Stage; and he never had anything to do with The Imp, which is why he didn’t appear in the Married Mary saga. Mary would have totally thrown herself at him, and Kirk would have definitely “thrown it in her.” He loved the ladies and often remarked that there was no such thing as an unappealing woman, nor was there anything sweeter than finding the pearl of passion in an outwardly plain dame. Fortunately for Kirk, he never met Mary. This was probably fortunate for Mary as well, seeing as Kirk was a confirmed bachelor and he would have probably broken her fat heart.
Kirk was an older guy. Not MOE old, though. He was in his early forties, but he easily passed for a carefree dude in his 30s... not that he lied about his age. I only mention this trait to juxtapose Kirk’s genuine youthful air with Moe’s unconvincing youthful farce. Kirk dressed normally, avoided stupid jargon, and never busted out gimmicks like tarot cards or spells. He just existed, behaved affably, and people liked him for it.
He drove a classic 1962 Cadillac El Dorado convertible with red leather interior, and he lived in a charmingly quaint (and ridiculously expensive) neighborhood. How he made his fortune remained a mystery, but he never bloviated about his wealth. He just threw spectacular parties and people showed up. And, to my knowledge, he never tried to lure women into bed with his money (although I’m sure he got his fair share of boom-boom thanks to his digs and his wheels, even if the gold-diggers denied their monetary agendas).
Kirk was legitimately handsome. He was a drummer, he had a full head of black hair, he was clean-shaven, he worked out, and he knew all the hidden gems in Wellsprings. So why hadn’t I tried... or even desired to date him? I don’t know. I just didn’t feel drawn to him like that. He felt like a cool uncle and he had, thus far, never done anything to change my perception. Plus, the age difference weirded me out a little. Kirk didn’t look forty; but knowing that he had so much more life experience than I did created a power imbalance that would have creeped me out if we’d been dating. As buddies, I just felt supremely cool riding in his Cadillac, smoking Fantasia cigarettes, and hitting the speakeasies and jazz clubs I would have never known about if it weren’t for Kirk’s connections.
And he had been a good person to talk to about my romantic woes. He never lecherously suggested that I should date him, and he gave the type of tempered advice that only comes with lived experience. But he often lightly mocked me for my crush on Dennis and he did a hilarious impression of Smegal popping too soon over his “precious.” So when Mary “got me back” by doing whatever she did with to Dennis, I called Kadillac Kirk and told him the drinks were on me if he’d be my designated driver for the night.
Why hadn’t I called Whisky??? Well, A) Kirk was way more fun to hang out with, at least from my past experiences up to that point. And B) I needed to bitch about a boy, something I couldn’t do in good conscience in front of a guy I was dating. So I put on the sexiest plunging halter dress I owned, applied heavy eye makeup and spikey accessories, braved a pair of stilettos, and sashayed out to Kirk’s convertible. I felt like a badass rock star. I probably looked like a try-hard hooker.
Kirk: Daaaaay-um! Somebody really did do a number on you, huh? I know you said you were upset, but the gents are gonna be writing thank you notes to that fat girl and that butt-fucking hobbit.
Me: I just need to feel pretty and numb. And I trust you to keep me from making a fool of myself.
Kirk squeezed my shoulder. “I’ve got you. You do whatever you need to do to get rid of these demons.”
He sparked up a J and offered me the first puff. I gladly accepted. He took one puff of his own, but said that the rest was mine since he didn’t want to drive stoned. See? He was responsible! Weed wasn’t legal in California yet, so I got a little bit baked before I stashed the sativa in the glove box and wrapped a scarf around my hair like a starlet from the Golden Age of Hollywood. Kirk sped out of the parking lot and said he was taking me to a downtown hotel that was hosting a party that night in their lush lobby.
Kadillac Kirk pulled up to the main entrance, paid the valet, and then opened my door. I was wobbly from the weed. And I had stupidly decided to wear heels. You can get high or you can wear high (heels). You can’t have both. Not if you’ve repeatedly injured both ankles (as I have). I had to take Kirk’s arm to keep from keeling over. “Can people tell I’m stoned?” I whispered. Kirk replied, “Nobody’s paying any attention to anyone else’s intoxication. I promise you that much.” I nodded, steadied myself, and strutted alongside my very cool friend, feeling a little more confident.
A live jazz orchestra was playing Cole Porter as we entered the lobby. Everything sparkled. The music was even more intoxicating than the spliff had been. “Just One of Those Things” brought tears to my eyes since the lyrics hit every raw nerve regarding the Dennis debacle. But I smiled. It might sound mental, but being distraught over a trash fire of a one-sided romance was exhilarating. Immature, for sure. But also exhilarating. You see, that kind of sadness doesn’t hurt. Not really. It stings. It leaves little bruises, but it’s very safe to wallow in because you haven’t actually lost anything. Melancholia over that which you never had is as sweet as it is bitter; and that type of twisted splendor is rivaled only by Stendhal.
“Here's hoping we meet now and then. It was great fun, but it was just one of those things.” I sang along with the band, and a fat tear rolled down past my melancholic smile and onto my chin. Kirk brushed it aside. “Too close to home?” I wiped away the remnants of the tear’s journey from eye to chin and smiled a more genuine smile. “The perfect distance from home. Shall we get drinks? Remember, I’m buying.”
Kirk: No, no. This is your time to heal. And I’m here as your pal, not your chauffeur. What would the lady like?”
I pretended to barf. Kirk knew I hated it when he got overly formal and overly attentive. So he did it just to mess with me. “Shot of vodka,” I replied.
Kirk: How many?
I thought briefly. “FIVE.”
Kirk: Five to one, baby. One in five...
Me: No one here gets out alive.
Kirk: Are you able to hold yourself upright, or should you come with?
I took a seat on an ornate, damask-upholstered chaise lounge. “I’ll be okay. And I was kidding about the five shots.”
I sat there lost in the music for a while. I thought very little about Dennis. Even less about Mary. And not at all about Whisky (whom I had shagged less than a week ago). My mind danced through the ornate lighting in the hotel lobby, and I suddenly felt the need to join the hoity-toity guests on the dancefloor!
Kirk returned with four shots of vodka. Two for him, two for me. That was quite reasonable of him. He knew damn well that I couldn’t handle five shots, but he also knew that I was in a... state. One that called for more than a single shot. I raised a both miniature glasses to “No more ninnyhammers or hairy-footed lovers.” Kirk did his hilarious Smegal impression, we double-toasted, and downed the shots. The band launched into “Let’s Misbehave,” and I kicked off my stilettos and made a beeline for the dance floor.
“There’s something wild about you child that’s so contagious. Let’s be outrageous! Let’s misbehave.” Kadillac Kirk swept me up, twirled me around, and dipped me as we both sang along with the lyrics. I wasn’t swooning for him, but I was enthralled by the moment. The music, the dancing, the combination of booze and bud... so I kissed him as he pulled me back to my feet. And he kissed back. In a way that Dennis never had. In a way that Whisky’s beard wouldn’t permit. I didn’t feel the visceral sensations that I’d felt when Dennis had kissed me, but it felt nice to feel desired. And then I noticed that other guests were watching us and applauding. Now, that was a dopamine rush if ever there was one!
I gently broke away from the embrace, high-fived Kirk and returned to the chaise lounge to put my stupid shoes back on. He followed me and smashed his face back onto mine. I pulled away and laughed. “It was a moment,” I told him. “I appreciate the dance, and that kiss was the perfect finale. But it’s not happening again.”
Kirk: Not to worry, Valerie. I know you. I knew all along that we were performing, and I was more than happy to be your scene partner.
Me: And dance partner! Those were some excellent moves! I didn’t know you had ballroom training.
Kirk: You name it, I’ve mastered it. Another drink for the lady?
I pretended to barf again. “Not yet. I’m not sad right now. Do you mind if I just sit here and enjoy the music?”
Kirk: Ah. My kisses do have healing properties...
I flipped my hand up at him. “Knock that shit off, bro. I wanted to hang out with you because I trust you not to get weird. Even if I get weird, I know you have the maturity to balance me out.”
Kirk: Are you calling me old???
Me: No. I’m calling you rational, responsible, and respectful.
Kirk: Well, now. If you can articulate an alliterative statement that fluently, then you clearly aren’t drunk enough!
I dismissed this comment as a joke. And he did indeed knock off the flirtation. We had a perfectly pleasant time chatting and dancing (no more kissing, though). And then I noticed a girl I knew from Into the Woods entering the lobby. She’d played Florinda and I’d played Little Red. I called her name and waved enthusiastically. She waved back. And then her date entered. It was D.E.N.N.I.S. I sank into the chaise. Kirk caught on immediately. “The hobbit???” he asked. I nodded silently. “You wanna make out again?” he enthused. I shook my head. I had to go say hello to Flo. And I had an idea...
I crossed the lobby, smiled, squealed, and hugged her.
Florinda: Lil’ Red! It’s been forever! So glad to see you!!! This is my friend, Denny.
Dennis was shifting uncomfortably. I extended my hand. “Nice to meet you. I know your date from Into the Woods. I bet she could tell you some entertaining stories about that show...” Flo laughed out loud, well aware of the many misadventures to which I'd referred. Of course, she might have been laughing because Dennis never, ever listened to anyone else's stories. He was too busy telling, re-telling, slightly altering, and exaggerating his own.
Dennis: C’mon, Val...
Me: Oh, you’ve heard of me? Small world! You guys picked a great night to come here. They’re playing Cole Porter, and the band is delovely!
Florinda (appearing oblivious to the iciness between me and Dennis): Have you seen Prince Big Bad (Scumbanger) lately?
I laughed. “Last time I saw him, he was hitting on some nasty fat chick at The Imp.”
Flo and I both scoffed at the pervy pest. Into the Woods was where I’d initially met Scumbanger. He played The Wolf/Cinderella’s Prince. Again... typecasting. There’s a whole essay in my brain about my first encounter with the pest, during which he quoted the song that he sang to me in the show, “Hello, Little Girl.” But it gets into some pretty uncomfortable territory because he made me feel excited. Well, excited and scared. Nothing of note happened during Into the Woods, but our odd interactions did kind of set the stage for some extremely regrettable events during that Cats cast party.
I excused myself, saying that I needed to get back to my friend. And then I leaned in and said in a hushed voice to Flo, “Watch your ass with that one. If he’s the Denny I’m thinking of...” I gave her a look that only another female would be able to read. Her eyebrows shot up and she nodded. Dennis continued to shift as though he were trying to hold in a massive dump. “BABE! Uh...”
Flo apparently answered to that moniker as well. “What is it, Denny? Don’t worry. That was just telepathic girl talk. You apparently have a reputation...”
Dennis: Different Denny. I assure you I’m a pious gentleman.
Me: Ah. My mistake. Well, then. You guys have a good time! Nice to meet you, Denny. Great to see you, Flo!
I hugged Flo again, gave Dennis a curt nod, ignored the scent of mandarins and mountain air, and returned to Kirk.
I collapsed on the chaise lounge, exhausted from holding back the rage. I had no right to be mad at Florinda. I hadn’t seen her in three years, so how was she supposed to know that I’d had a thing with Dennis? Hell, I couldn’t even be mad at Dennis because the last time he and I had spoken in any meaningful way, I’d told him that I was no longer entertaining my crush on him. So why was I surprised to see him dating??? And why had he never taken ME out on a date like this??? And why wasn’t I smitten with Kadillac Kirk who HAD taken me out on a date like this, was an objectively excellent kisser, and a bona fide BALLER? What was wrong with me???
Kirk suggested going down the street to a quaint little bar and then sobering up at a diner closer to my apartment. I numbly nodded and followed him in silence for a few blocks. He assured me that I had “turned several heads” on the way to the new location, but I neither cared nor believed him. This wasn't the type of numbness I'd been aiming for. Now I needed to get schnockered. “Five shots of vodka, please.” Yes, I was serious.
Kadillac Kirk, my reliable designated driver, ordered only a beer and watched in something across between astonishment, concern, and delight as I slammed all five shots in rapid succession. I half expected to immediately retch all over the bar. But I felt fine. I half expected to immediately lose consciousness and wake up in the hospital. But I remained coherent. How I’d managed to take in that much hard liquor and suffer no direct consequences, I’ll never know.
I think I wanted to suffer. I wanted to either feel nothing at all or to feel a sickness bad enough to distract me from the scorching sting that pulsed through my being when I realized that I had lost the abstract notion I’d been addicted to this entire time. Hope. It wasn’t Dennis himself I couldn’t quit. It was that drug called hope. The hope that maybe, just maybe Dennis would give our romance a fair chance. The hope that maybe, just maybe he would make peace with himself, get his mind out of his crotch, and enjoy some agenda-free togetherness. The hope that maybe, just maybe he would stop bloviating about his admittedly impressive accomplishments for five fucking minutes and ask about my life. I had my own reasonably impressive accomplishments, even if they paled in comparison to his. A proper suitor would have enjoyed hearing about them.
But seeing him out with another woman, a woman who had no reason to parade her Dennis escapades before me as some means of revenge, a woman he was clearly courting of his own volition... My hope had died. It died before I’d had time to wean myself off it. Now I had to mourn the loss of hope, which is a very tricky brand of grief to navigate. Vodka wasn’t the answer, but it was what I had to work with. So it would have to do.
After enough time had passed without vomiting or collapsing, I asked Kirk to bring his car around to the bar so that I didn’t have to walk two and a half blocks drunk and in heels. He nodded and dramatically leaned in for a kiss. I recoiled. “DUDE! I told you. The moment has passed.”
Kirk: I beg your pardon. I misread your eyes. Thought I saw a green light...
Me: It’s fine. I just want to go home while I’m still feeling okay.
Kirk: Of course. Your chariot will be here soon.
He skipped off to fetch his Cadillac and I noticed that the lights in the bar were beginning to dance a bit. This should have been concerning. But then I realized that I was giggling. Wait... What? Oh shit. Sure, I was drunk from those shots. But what I was feeling in that moment wasn’t drunkery. It was stonery. Kirk probably misread my face because my pupils were dilated. Not from desire, but from drug use.
Some of you might be thinking that I was a bad friend for not introducing Lucy, an old dude connoisseur, to Kirk. Well... I did. Several years before the events of this story. He adored her. She, on the other hand, thought he was immature. And she wasn’t wrong. Lucy was astute when it came to sussing out a person’s true nature. Far more astute than I. Her initial assessment that Kirk was immature is about to be vindicated. Stretch those cringe muscles! It’s almost time for pie...
I somehow managed to get to his car. I honestly don’t recall how I got there. Did one of the bartenders carry me? Did some kind patron allow me to lean on him? Had Kadillac Kirk carried me out? I’m not sure. But my memory ceases to be fuzzy about halfway to the 24-hour diner. It might have been the very same 24-hour diner where Mary pulled her... shenanigans. I’ll never know.
Kirk: Would you say that you’re more drunk or more stoned?
Me: STONED. Definitely stoned.
Kirk made some sort of grunty noise and reached for my thigh. I slapped his hand.
Kirk: Stoned but not amorous? That’s rare.
I started laughing rather unkindly. “You’re a fucking horndog! I thought you were my safe straight male friend, dammit.”
Kirk: I solemnly swear that your safety is my primary concern, my stoned beauty.
I pretended to throw up.
Kirk: So... You’re not horny. But are you hungry? The diner I’m heading to makes this Maple Walnut Pie with the most sumptuous... sensual cream and exquisite drizzling of...
Me: Ew! Stop trying to bang the pie. Bro. Are YOU stoned? (Then I remembered the question.) Yes, I’m hungry. But I don’t like nuts. I’ll have banana cream.
Kirk made that repulsive grunty noise again. “Uhhhhh... Mmmmmm. Cream. Yessssss. Yes, we’ll be there in just a minute.” He was squirming in the driver's seat.
Me: GROSS, DUDE! If you’re gonna be like that I’ll just order HASH brows. Get it? Hash??? (I giggled uncontrollably.). You can’t make that sound nasty.
Kirk: Forgive my jokes. I think my blood sugar’s a bit low.
As Kirk parked, I began to wonder how I might get away with walking shoeless into the diner. The stilettos had to get off my feet. At least while I was walking. And Kirk was kind enough to give me his socks and wear his loafers “island style” into the establishment. Okay, that was gallant of him. Maybe he was going to behave himself for the rest of the evening.
I wasn’t terribly talkative as we sat down, and he expressed concern for my emotional well-being. I wasn’t coherent enough to explain what was happening to my emotions and I wasn’t sure I trusted him with my deep, dark secrets at that point. So I shrugged like a sulky teenager, ran my hands over my messy, windblown hair, and mumbled that I was “just hungry.” And right on cue, a very kind, slightly older waitress with a sweet southern accent stopped by to take our order.
Kirk: Ah, yes. We’ll have two cups of black coffee. And we’ll share a slice of that delectable Maple Walnut Pie.
Waitress: Oh, honey. That pie is scrumptious! I take it you’ve been here before?
Kirk: I have. This will be her first time to taste the splendor.
I hated to be a killjoy, but I interrupted and said to the waitress, “Ma’am? I’m sure the Maple Walnut is excellent, but could I please get a slice of Banana Cream? And a big glass of ice water?
Waitress: Sure, hon! Banana Cream’s just as yummy! I’ll be right back with those coffees and that big water.
Kirk was sucking on the tip of his forefinger and shaking his head a bit. “You’re passing up so many sensational... sensual...”
I put my forehead on the table and growled. “You swore you’d stop being nasty!” I held this #headdesk pose for quite some time before I finally lifted my head... only to see that Kirk was still sucking his fingertip and staring at me like a wild animal. “Pleeeeeease be normal,” I whined. “It’s been a really weird night for me.”
Kirk: Indeed. Many surprises. You know... You’re like titanium. Your flame burns so fast and so bright, if a guy doesn’t get in there while the iron is hot, he’ll never get another chance. I was too slow.
What the...? I was pretty sure he was wrong about titanium burning quickly. I’m no chemistry wiz, but my dad and my oldest brother are both big-brains when it comes to physics and chemistry. So I picked up some things just listening to them talk. Accurate or inaccurate, Kirk was being creepy again. He’d never been creepy towards me before, although I’d seen him act like this with other women. Usually with staggering success. Why????? His money. It had to be his money. Kirk was a nice-looking man, but holy shit... No amount of good looks could save this creep show.
And then, our sweet waitress sat down our coffees, my water, and the two slices of pie. After I gulped down a whole bunch of water, I grabbed a fork, prepared to quell my munchies... and then I froze. Kirk was quickly flicking his finger back and forth across the top of his pie. And moaning. He noticed my wide-eyed stare, smirked, sucked the tip of his thumb, picked up the plate with both hands, and began flicking his tongue across the tip of the triangular pie slice. And moaning some more. Well, there went my appetite.
Kirk took his middle finger and jabbed it into the crustless vertex of the pie slice, then he began pumping it in and out like a piston, and flicking his thumb across the increasingly demolished top layer of whipped cream. He gasped this time. People were starting to stare. His pointer finger joined his middle finger in the piston action, and he replaced his thumb with his tongue. Between flicks of the tongue, he groaned, “Oh yeah, baby... Let me taste you,” but it was kind of hard to understand him.
And I was either about to run to the back office, tell them that I was in danger and needed a police escort home... OR I was about to burst out laughing at the spectacle. Kirk continued... He removed his fingers and gregariously licked pie filling off of them. And then he started sucking his fingertips again, switching from middle to pointer, middle to pointer and emitting a delighted little, “Mmmmmm” with every suck.
Finally, he jabbed his fingers back into the utterly destroyed pie, lowered his face into the mess and lapped loudly and passionately, moaning, grunting, and mumbling “Come on, baby. Come on. Mmmmmm. Come on.” I could see the waitress and some dude in a suit heading over to the table, so I sank down in my seat, partially covered my face, but continued to watch the train wreck. At last, Kirk shuddered violently, he splatted his entire hand onto the plate and rubbed furiously. And then he locked eyes with me. He sucked the tip of his thumb one final time and said, “You...” There was a long pause during which Kirk lovingly stroked the mess he’d made. “You... are the pie.”
I don’t hang out with Kadillac Kirk anymore. But he’s still a bachelor, ladies!

Recently my life went downhill as I was burned by many people. I lost my apartment, and I was constantly job hopping for a good 6 months just trying to recover and try to get back on track. I became addicted to alcohol which I have since stopped for about a month now and I’m proud of myself for that. My girlfriend at the time started acting just completely different and no matter how I tried to talked to her it just felt that she was clocked out.
Well we broke up the other day, come to find out she was messaging my friend behind my back for 6 months straight just trying to find dirt on me, but my friend essentially told her to grow up and talk to me about these issues (my friend is a great guy, he even showed me screenshots and I was glad to see he had my back the whole time. We’ve been friends since high school and he’s never been one to burn me or go behind my back to hurt me). He finally decided to spill the beans and showed me that she told him she was going on dates with this other guy behind my back, and how she is just too scared to break up with me.
I have had her blocked for a few days now, but seeing all of this after being told that she doesn’t love me anymore and wants me out of her life just has me laying here so numb. I’ve never truly been cheated on like this and I always went out of my way to try my best for her. Some more context about my ex, she can’t get a legal job, can’t get a bank account, drivers license, etc. She has been in the immigration process for almost 4 years with no progress, and no signs of it changing.
I feel so used, emotionally manipulated, and just so empty. I can’t sleep, I’m losing weight, and I just don’t have any motivation. I just feel empty.
I just need to get this off my chest.

I am traveling with my grandparents, and they cannot walk very much. This means we need to take things slowly and space out our activities. The main idea of the trip is to give my grandparents a feel for Japan, as they have wanted to visit for a very long time. Our goal is not to see everything, but only the must-see attractions. Here is the itinerary:
Day 1: Thursday

• 06:30 - Land in Tokyo
• 08:00 - Check in at the hotel, relax for a bit
• 13:00 - Step out for lunch (open to recommendations)
• Rest of the Day: Free to walk around and explore, maybe imperial palace, Ginza street

Day 2: Friday (Tokyo to Kyoto)

• 11:00 - Train to Kyoto
• 13:30 - Check in at the hotel
• 14:30 - Lunch (restaurant recommendations, please)
• 18:00 - Explore the Geisha district

Day 3: Saturday

• 11:00 - Visit Fushimi Inari Shrine
• 13:30 - Lunch
• 17:00 - Explore Nishiki Market

Day 4: Sunday (Day trip to Uji and Nara)

• 10:00 - Take a private taxi from the hotel
• 11:00 - Stop at Uji, have some matcha
• 14:00 - Spend the day in Nara, including dinner (what to explore?)
• 19:00 - Head back to Kyoto

Day 5: Monday (Last day in Kyoto)

• Need recommendations, maybe visit Arashiyama Bamboo Grove?

Day 6: Tuesday (Kyoto to Tokyo)

• 13:30 - Arrive in Tokyo
• 14:00 - Check in at the hotel
• 17:00 - Explore Ginza

Day 7: Wednesday (Free day in Tokyo)

• Suggested: teamLab Borderless, Sensoji Temple, Tokyo Skytree

Day 8: Thursday (Day trip to Hakone)

• Open to recommendations for lunch and dinner

Day 9: Friday (Free day in Tokyo)

• Suggested: Ueno Park, Shibuya Crossing, Imperial Palace, Takeshita Street

Day 10: Saturday

• Early morning flight back home

I am flexible with changing things around, except for the number of days in Kyoto and Tokyo, as the hotels have already been booked. I would love recommendations on attractions to see or skip from the above and if I am missing out on something.
Feel free to adjust any details as needed!

After Luds comment on his last stream I did a quick Reddit search and found this post from 9yrs ago in sex by U/LudwigAhgren
Note: It was a funny read and definitely in his charming grammar style.
Note 2: Some of things do not work anymore but, a few still do.
“The Ultimate Guide to Shaving Your Pubes for Beginners (Men)
If you have a bush like Brillo^© , or just want to trim up the forrest so others can pass safely, you're in the right place.
I split groin hair into 5 different groups. Below I have listed the difficulty of each area as well as what kind of shave each area shall receive.
This is what we want the end product to look like. (His pubes look like the mustache of almighty Zeus himself!)

Pubic Hair	Ball Hair	Taint/Gooch Hair	High Thigh Hair	Shaft Hair
Easiest to shave. Needs to be trimmed down (No new-born baby penis look)	Scariest/Most Difficult to shave. This will be a clean shave.	Moderate difficulty. Up to shaver, but I prefer a clean shave.	Easy to shave. This will be a clean shave.	Nicks can happen here easily. This will be a clean shave.

Tools Needed: Shaving cream (MUST - Practice before which shaving cream works best! Sometimes Conditioner can work better),
electric razor (The side that pops out I will refer to as buzzer and the side with the guard I will refer to as electric razor from here on out)
A Women’s! shaving razor (women’s razors have a much higher guard and will protect better than one for men.
 
*PLEASE BE PREPARED!* I mean it’s your balls we’re talking about here…
 
Step 1: The first step will be to shave the pubic hair. Depending on how much hair is down there, you have the option to go at it with scissors like a harbor before throwing the buzzer down there. If you have an average amount (2”>x) then go at it with the buzzer. Hover your family jewels over the toilet, you may even choose to sit like a cool substitute teacher. Brush the square side of the buzzer backwards across your pubes vertically. It may seem as if it isn’t doing anything but trust me you’re losing hair faster than LeBraun James. Continue this until you deem it short enough, I like my pubes around 1/2”.
Note Make sure the pubes length is even throughout, focusing on areas that with longer hair to insure optimum symmetry, bitches love symmetry. Use a mirror!
 
Step 2: Now you’ll want to ‘square’ out your hair and completely shave off any outliers around your pubes. Perhaps you have a leaky happy trail? Or maybe your pubes are ‘fading’ in. Either way you’ll want this instead of this (not penis don’t fret) Use a mirror to make sure it’s not lopsided.
 
Step 3: Here we are going to tackle that upper thigh hair that encompasses the whole male crotch area. Now get all nakey if you aren’t already and hop in that shower. Make sure the water is warm because you’re going to be in there for a while. Whip out you’re shaving cream of choice, I use this because it makes the blade glide across my nuts (phrase of the day!). To be fair I am more metrosexual than most gay men. Anyway(!) lather that shaving cream on to you’re upper thigh, above the pubes and right around the taint (make sure the water isn’t washing it all away) and start shaving those areas. The shaving razor will insure that these areas are hair-free.
Note Make sure the blade follows the surface of the skin. You want max blade to skin contact.
 
Step 4: Here’s my favorite part. Shaving the shaft. Why is it my favorite? It adds an inch to your perceived dick length (now your dick will look like it’s an inch long^rekt. Extend your dick by pulling out your head. It will give a similar surface on the base of the dick to an erect penis. Now with the shaving cream and razor, shave the front part of the base, while always making sure the base is flat. Then do each side, trying your best to make the area being shaved flat. A flat area not only allows the razor to get more hair, it also prevents little nicks that can occur. I’ll refer back to Davidfor how far down the base you should shave.
Note If you look at the pic of David, you’ll notice he shaved the area to the right and left of his penis. That is totally you’re call, I have no opinion I find both to by stylish in their own penis way.
 
Step 5: The balls. AKA Holyshitiamsoscarediamgoingtochopmynutsoff. You may be tempted to skip this part, but trust me, hairy balls do not look good when the rest has been shaved. If you start this, you must to finish it. You are the chosen one. You are supposed to bring balance to your pubes, not leave them in darkness! Do it for the (potential) children.
Back to the balls. We’re going to first start with the outside balls. To do this get in your best captain stance which creates a nice U shape between your thigh and outer left/right ball. This is the kind of U Brett Farve has been talking about. Now, using that handy shaving cream and razor, this should be quite easy. Gently go up that are and always going along the grain. Don’t switch up directions here, that’s too ballsy.
After that’s done we’re going to drift away from the pubes for just a bit. Throw some shaving cream on the taint (this is the area that prevents you from shitting on your balls) and you’ll want to shave from your asshole to the base of your balls. Always going in that direction. IMPORTANT If you touch your taint (ew you’re gross) you’ll notice there is a line. Kind of feels like hair running from your asshole to your balls. It’s actually a vein that controls your orgasms. DO NOT SHAVE ON THIS VEIN Shave to the left and right of it. Don’t go directly on it. I don’t think anything will happen if you do… but better safe than orgasmless.
 
Step 6: Back to the balls and the last part of the shaving in the shower. This part is difficult and to be honest I’m not sure of the best way to approach this. Balls are weird and that they have no fucking shape and 2 million wrinkles. I like to first take my electric razor and use the buzzer part of it. Then I just air swipe my balls getting all the hair about 1/4” short. Then I take the shaving cream and focus on specific parts squeezing my balls to get maximum surface area. This seems to work out for me, but keeping it 1/4 of an inch isn’t that big of a deal. Hair that short is difficult to notice and ladies/men will still suck your nuts.
Note Loosen up before shaving your balls. Take deep breaths and relax. Make sure your asshole isn’t clenched because that raises your balls. And if you’re down there shaving with a clenched asshole, and for any reason your asshole unclenches, you’re balls will drop (again) and hell will break loose. It is better to shave them while they are low and have them clench upwards.
 
Step 7: Clean up all the pubes off of your body. This is no simple task. Water is an adhesive so you’ll have to detach the shower head and put that all up in your business. I like to turn on the bath and use that heavy rush of water to cleanse my body of those clingy cutoff pubes. Hop out the shower, dry off and look at your masterpiece Michelangelo. But you are not done yet!
 
Step 8: Similar to barbers, you will have missed a few hair and you’ll probably have a few 2 inch hairs amongst you’re gently coiffed pubes. Grab a pair of nail scissors or whatever tool you prefer and chop those suckers off. The majority will be on your balls. A fun thing I like to do that is totally fucking weird, is pulling long pubes on my balls and plucking them off. It is surprisingly easy to do so because of the loose ball skin. Don’t yank it out like a band-aid though or you’ll need a band-aid (Ha Ha.. I’m not funny)
 
Voila, you’re done. Get some aftershave on those freshly shaven balls to disinfect your nicks and make those meaty knockers smell like a man. Congratulations and I hope I was of some help!
 
Edit 1: Let't talk about asshole hair, (what a great conversation start^{furiouslyjotsdown)} that area can be shaved and it can look/feel good! But personally, I like to keep my Brown Eye of Sauron to myself. No traveller has dared venture down so I feel no need to shave.
Edit 2: One of my ball shaving colleagues has alerted me that the 'taint vein' is actually, "[A] scar, from where the skin fuses before birth and is called the perineal raphe." (Google it for some nice visuals)
 
Thank you all for the great response! Being on the front page of sex is something all my future employers will be impressed by. I recently shaved and I seriously mistook my junk for King David's jewels (obviously he is miles bigger) and I thought I'd right down exactly what I did.”

My brother in law passed away unexpectedly. He had an ex-girlfriend they dated on and off for 6 years and have been broken up for 4+ years, but still communicated occasionally. They never lived togethehad kids. He would help her and her kids (previous marriage)out financially. He was laid off his job and couldn't provide the same amount financially like he was before. She broke up with him soon after.
She was devastated when she found out he passed away. Fast forward a week or so later she has texted/called my MIL whom is understandably grieving, at first really supportive talking about how wonderful he was to her over the years, then mentioning when they were dating he wrote a handwritten will leaving her his entire estate and texted a picture of it to MIL. His estate is substantial, he had another will made with a lawyer after they broke up and she wasn't included.
I feel like she is a gold digger and really inconsiderate to send that to my MIL so soon after. Husband thinks she is just showing everyone how much he loved her and she had to know he created a new will after they broke up. I feel like she doesn't know about the new will yet and is going to start creating drama. AITAH for thinking she is an inconsiderate gold digger.

Hi, everyone
My ex and I were together for almost 6 years, but we've known each other since we were middle school. One night just right after coming from a date and planning for Valentine's Day, he suddenly broke up with me. I never saw it coming.
Days before the break-up the topic of marriage came up from our friends and family, and he started distancing himself. I tried to reassure him that I was not in a hurry to get married, what mattered most was that I wanted to be with him, and we've had talks about moving in together and traveling in the future. I gave him the space to calm down and would check up on him as he was dropping hints too that he wasn't okay. I picked up on them, which led me to ask, but he'd always just say that he's okay, or just tired, and that he was going to talk to me about it when he was ready. I respected that and didn't want to force it out of him as that might cause different problem altogether. Then days after, the blindside happens. He said he no longer feels any love for me, it seems like he is losing himself, and that he couldn't see me as his partner in the future-- but he doesn't know why. It was just something he was feeling.
Our relationship was great, and healthy, and we've been best friends for the longest time. We've broken up before (he was the one who left), but learned from what we lacked in that relationship and worked hard to be better, so we had healthy ways of communicating what bothered us. Turns out, there were things he didn't communicate because he didn't know how to and worried how I would react.
It's been almost 4 months, and I honestly don't see the light at the end of the tunnel. I feel my self-worth has taken a massive hit, and am constantly thinking about why I wasn't good enough or worth it enough to stay and fight for. I am also slowly losing hope in finding love again because I never want to go through something like this ever again. It's just too painful. I heard from a friend of ours that he thought I'd be okay by now as we have had the "closure" talk last April. I don't know how he could ever think such a thing, after what he just did to me and our relationship. I honestly hope he realizes what he's lost and regrets it, because as of now, he doesn't.
I wanted to ask: does it ever get better? Any perspective that you guys could share that could help me look on the bright side? Any good stories? Thank you so much.
TLDR; BF of 6 years blindsided me, and after almost 4 months, I am having a hard time seeing how it gets better. Any stories/advice?

Hey Burmese lovers! I’ve been on a wait list for a Burmese kitten for a few months now. A reputable breeder contacted me saying while they don’t have any kittens, they think our family might be just perfect for a 4 year old retired Burmese who’s looking for her forever home. This was one of their Queens who had her babies and is ready to move on to her forever family. While I had my heart set on a kitten, so many positives have come to mind. -Already spayed and microchipped -established personality is sweet, affectionate, cuddly -bypass the mischievous, insanely busy kitten phase -providing a safe home and a beautiful life for a cat who’s looking for exactly that.
I’ve never adopted an ‘older’ cat, my only experience was with our one and only Burmilla who we fell in love with as a kitten, and just recently crossed the rainbow bridge at the age of 15.
My question is, and I know it probably sounds like a weird one, when taking on a 4 year old cat, what does this look like? Will I love her, and will she love us, to the same degree (eventually, anyways) as if we had taken her on as a kitten? Is that bonding process something that can happen at any point in a cats life? Or will she always really feel like somebody else’s cat who just lives with us? I have two kids, and that vision of us welcoming a kitten into our family is a very dominate dream. But also, I had a feeling that our next fur baby would find us, not the other way around, and I can’t seem to stop thinking about this potential new member of the family. Is this simply meant to be?
Any advice from those who have adopted an ‘older’ cat? Would love to hear about some experiences, or pros and cons I haven’t thought of. Would appreciate some outside views on this topic very much!

Hey my name is Liam and I wanted to share a theory about the demons some people have collectively seen
Disclaimer: I've done no previous research and pretty much have no idea what I'm talking about
My theory is if you've awakened your brain but not your body something potentially bad can happen and he's stopping it from happening by scaring the shit outta you, this may only happen to some people who tend to freak out less than others in scary situations and the "sleep demon" we all see is pretty much turns up that level of fear to help you awake and to put your body into action to prevent the situation (fight or flight response) whatever this situation is I'm unsure of. Potentially sleep paralysis happening for a longer period which could cause extreme fear, even more so than a demon sitting in your room for a small amount of time, stress so high it could be a snapping point which could maybe make you lose your sanity (I'm a schizophrenic and this one scares me although unlikely) or ones exceptence that they are now paralysed which could cause l.I.S (locked-in syndrome) I haven't done any research so feel free to disprove any of these theories. Also if anyone has a story of them being stuck in a room with a sleep paralysis demon for long periods of time if love to hear it. If you have looked at them for long periods of time what did they do and were they trying to be scary? Like did they randomly run towards you, walk creepily, jumpy movement, overly slow movement?
My experiences:
My first one and main reason of thinking this. I dreamt I was in a room and it was not my room then for some reason hopped in to bed and fell asleep (in the dream) and had a completely different dream which was about some random shit I was doing with my friends don't remeber the details then eventually I awoke for that dream to have a black figure standing over me I couldn't move at all. I was stuck in this weird room that was not mine and was staring straight at him/her I freaked out and then woke up. Lasted total 4 seconds
The next I don't remeber the previous dream at all I just remeber not being able to breath and there's a dark figure staring at me choking me was extremely scary I was trying to move to fight back but couldn't. Dream lasted estimated 6 seconds but was scary as fuck.
Others aren't all that interesting.

Hi all!
I come in peace from the wonderful world of WHOOP!
So here is a bit of backstory, I've been a WHOOP user for 2 years, love everything about it, data is great, the recovery information etc is really insightful.
However:
I'm becoming more and more active and I would like to have more insight in my training rather than just information about "just" my strain. And consifering the pricetag, I decided to cancel my WHOOP and put my money in a GARMIN watch instead!
So, I looked at all the watches, the specs, the videos, the articles etc and here I am with my thoughts:
What I want in the watch:
Being able to track my sleep etc just like I did with the whoop and;
Track my activities: Crossfit 2-3 times a week Running 2-3 times a week and I like doing some Obstacle running (SPARTAN). i recently started doing some mild trail running and really enjoyed it so probably more of that to come. I like going for walks and small hikes.
From what i gather the FENIX 7 Pro has everything and especially the Obstacle run activity!
I found the "Standard" for 599€ and the Sapphire for 679€
I have to say it is an investment and I start to wonder if that's a bit over the top for my usage.
I'm looking at the FORERUNNER 965 and I found it for 520€ or even the 265 which I found at 399€.
Is the price difference worth it? Should I go with Sapphire or not? is the 265 enough for my daily usage? Can you sleep with a FENIX 7 pro?
I have many questions to be honest and I would love to start an open conversation about it with actual users of the watches! So I hope we can have a nice chat here! Looking forward!
TL;DR: Lookinf for my first Garmin watch after 2 years of whoop, I want what is in WHOOP + being able to track activities like Crossfit, running, trail run, Obstacle races (SPARTAN) I son't want to break the bank just for the sake of it so I want the right balance between price and usage. can you give me your thoughts?

As a long-time Digitakt and Tone owner, I recently picked up the Syntakt too because, of course, I'm a shill. I'm really loving it, but I'm finding it hard to get a balanced mix. For example, on the Digitakt, I'm able to get a lot of clarity in the low end and have my kicks punch through. However, no matter what I do with the Syntakt, they seem to sound really muddy and quiet. Does anyone have a tutorial or any tips on why this is happening? Currently, the Digi is going to my OT input 1,2, and the Syn is going to input 3,4.

Hi everybody,
I have a Masters in Clinical Psychology from a well-reputed European University, but I have been working as a literature teacher for teenagers in a private school here in Switzerland for the past 10 years. When I first moved, my French wasn't good enough to find a Psychology job here, and there weren't many options in English. I worked in a couple of institutions (intern jobs because of my lack of French), but I ended up doing a course to be able to teach English here, and I never looked back. Until now! 😅 I am quite happy teaching, and I managed to move up and am now part of the direction team. So I recently started teaching Psychology (high school), and I am loving it! So much that I am thinking about getting back into the field. I had forgotten so many things that made me choose it in the first place!So here are my questions:

• Any Clinical Psychologists out there that can help me understand the job market a bit?
• I did some research, and there are some research jobs, but I'm not really interested in those...I would ideally like to go back to 1-1 counselling like I did way back then...
• In my home country, it is possible to do psychotherapy once you finish your MA in Clinical Psychology, but is it the same here? It seems to me that in Switzerland they ask for additional training... I wouldn't mind doing it, but it would be a big investment (time/money). I now speak French fluently, by the way. :)
• What about online counselling? Is that a thing now?

Thank you in advance for your feedback! :)

I am making this post hoping somebody can gain some help/insight from this. Even if it is comparing and deciding that their event(s) is nowhere nearly as bad. I am just hoping this helps. I have multiple events and they all make me a sick disgusting monster, most likely incomparable to all of you.
I have ocd, and have struggled in the past but I have been on a roll for the past 2 years with very few slip ups. This stuff that pertains to real events is way different than any other area of my life that ocd has effected.
I am going to add a bit of background about my childhood. This is in no way an excuse or justification for my horrible actions. I am currently a 21 year old male. Living with some friends away from family going to college and working.
Both of my parents were addicts fresh out of treatment, my dad left when I was really young. They had a horrible emotionally and physically abusive relationship. My older brother who is almost exactly 3 years older than me was my only guidance at the time as we didn’t have many friends from moving a couple times. This same older brother sexually abused me for a couple years, I was complicit because I didn’t understand anything was wrong, I figured this was normal for kids. It happened from 7-13 years old. It started as exposing me to porn and teaching me to masturbate, then it turned into sexual touching and sexual acts such as convincing me to give/recieve oral sex, and almost attempt penetration. This was not often, however it happened on a few occasions all within a month. We also practiced kissing. I am not gay. I do not struggle with my sexuality. I like women.
He eventually went to high school and met girls and I’m guessing he left this in the past. So did I for a while, I had no idea the impact it had on me.
Below I am going to list my actions since then and why I am so distressed. All of this behavior occurred from 13-20 years old before I had the big realization.

1. I was totally hypersexual I had inappropriate fantasies involving people in my life, including my own family.
   
2. I masturbated to pictures of cousins and my sisters, all close in age, but still blood family.
   
3. I took a couple pictures of my sister in my early teens, nothing naked or exposing, but still inappropriate and for the wrong reasons. (Under 10 photos, still inappropriate, not a justification.) (since deleted.) (never sent them anywhere or did anything else with them)
   
4. I realized this was an invasion of privacy, I just had absolutely no moral compass and 0 sexual outlet, so I just masturbated to get rid of the “desire” or “thoughts”
   

I knew touching or initiating with any of these people was absolutely wrong or forbidden. I never even considered it, however I still masturbated to these thoughts and images.
In my head it was a way to release sexual energy. I even thought this was something that others may relate to later in life and laugh about. Since then I have realized I am most likely alone, and if I shared these events, people would despise me.
What bothers me is that I genuinely thought there was nothing wrong with my behavior. Legally there wasn’t, but morally there absolutely was. Legal is all I had to go off. And that’s what sometimes make me feel better is the fact that i genuinely didn’t know better. I knew better than not to touch anybody and not to watch anything illegal, however, that’s about it. I thought everyone was curious around this time.
Side note: my dad had a group chat at this time where they would send many pictures of women out in public to each other and rate them, maybe this is why I thought this was okay ? (The taking photos part)
I never ever thought twice about my actions. They seemed justified, they seemed normal for me, don’t ask how, I’m yet to figure that out. I am disgusted with myself.
I found myself recently looking this up all day everyday and finding a couple people that relate but there were a lot of comments that said people like me were the scum of the earth, and I’m having a hard time not believing that.
What hurts the most is nobody knowing, everyone always commends me for how good of a person I have became and all my accomplishments despite my tough childhood. But I feel like they just don’t know who I was and what mistakes I’ve made.
It feels like I’d rather be a serial killer or something I feel like the worst person on the planet to be honest.
I don’t see a way out of this. All my friends and peers love me, but they don’t know this. And I know it would make them disgusted with me. Which I am okay with at this point because I deserve it.
I also know that I would ruin my family life, but i deserve to be despised.
I am posting this hoping that somebody could see this and understand they don’t have it as bad as they think. These were all my actions though and I take full accountability.
I am curious to know how anybody could justify this or explain to me that I’m not just as bad as a rapist or a sex offender or pedophile. As far as I’m concerned, I am and I deserve to be treated as So.
I am going to sleep I hope I’ve helped somebody to know whatever their event is, you’re not alone, or it could be worse. Not trying to minimize, I just know how it is, believe me.
And before you tell me to go to therapy, I am already in the process.
I just want to share in hopes of somebody relating, or telling me I was a sicko, either way I don’t care, I just want feedback.
I know a lot of peoples events are related to sexual stuff. But I’m sure these are some of the worst of the worst.
Thanks for reading. Sorry if I wrote too much. I’ve been needing to let this out.
Any questions or anything, advice, criticism, are welcome here or in dm.

Last December, I visited Baguio and really fell in love with the vibes and culture here. Since then, I've been seriously thinking about moving here for a few years to see how it goes or hopefully settle down.
The weather, people, and culture here seems to be the city I’ve been longing for. Or does this get old?
Just a quick background, I'm a 24yo software engineer from the US, and my job is fully remote. I’ve saved up enough money to live comfortably for at least five years without work (hoping this is not the case), and I have investments that should last even longer if they perform well. I know it’s a bit of a risky decision, but I want to take the chance to live my life and not just chase money. I’ll be moving alone and don’t have many responsibilities in terms of family relationships. I’ve been working ever since I was 16yo and I grew up without my parents so being independent wouldn’t be a problem.
And, if things don't go as planned and I need to find work in Baguio, similarly to what I have now, am I cooked? I’m okay with a pay cut as long as it’s enough to live on. Also, I’m Filipino if that matters, but I only understand about 85% of the language and can’t speak it well without tripping up on some words and pronunciations.
Like I said, this is quite risky but I really want to get out of this country and want to live a whole different life. Any tips or advice would be greatly appreciated!

Ok some context here.
I'm a dad to an 8yo boy. His mum and I never married and never really lived together for any meaningful amount of time (due to my work location at that time).
She terminated our first baby, even after making a grand announcement to her family that she was pregnant. Despite this, I stuck around and she got pregnant again a few months later. During that pregnancy, I just couldn't get close to her. I was gripped by fear that she would announce out of the blue, again, that she wasn't proceeding. I was ridiculed by her and her family, she even told me not to worry because legally in her country she wasn't allowed another termination so soon after the last one.
I ended our relationship at the end of 2018 (nobody else involved, I could just tell I wasn't appreciated, respected or wanted. I was 'convenient' to keep around from a financial perspective) when our Son was just over 3 and, despite my efforts to engage through mediation, she insisted we go through court as she wanted sole custody and a fat monthly pay-day and I wanted to be with my Son equally and, therefore, joint custody.
To add a little more context
We are from different countries (hers a non-english speaking one) yet I gave up my lucrative career and relocated here, integrated myself (studied the language, taught some English as a volunteer etc.) and went through the local family court system.
Eventually, the Judge ordered joint custody, which she immediately appealed against and, only at the day of the appeal when she was told she may lose the financial package I had been ordered to pay, did she withdraw her appeal.
Ever since then, almost 4 years, she has done nothing but try to make life intolerable. So many things I can't even begin to go into detail but, as an example, just yesterday I went to collect my Son at 3pm. He had a football match planned at 4.30pm and he was visibly upset because he wanted his mum to take him there. I took him for a walk and explained the way things are and he calmed down a bit. Then his mum appeared (she was basically hiding around the corner and eavesdropping on our 'man chat') and he got upset again. She went into this tirade about how I was frightening him and things like "look at our poor little boy, so afraid of you" blah blah blah. Then her Father joined in (they live in a multi-generation home as is common here) and the culmination of this was him spitting at me, in front of my Son (his Grandson) before he scuttled off back to his house.
Anyway, the questions I have are why do you women make this already difficult and complex situation worse? Have you got nothing better to do with your lives than scheme about how to f*&k over your ex? Are you really so bitter about not being wanted by a guy, for whatever reason, that the only focus you have is manipulating your kids and doing everything possible to turn them against their Father?
I know it's not always the case, and there are some real diamonds (all thanks to you, you are appreciated) who go out of their way to foster a collaborative and loving environment for the kids.
EDIT: Typos.

Vashikaran comes from the Indian astrology and occult science that people have been fascinated about for hundreds of years. Vashikaran is the name of the art of hypnotizing a person and controlling the mind of the person. It is in fact a kind of hypnosis that allows the practitioner to rule the mind of another individual.
Jadu tona totka on the other hand refers to black magic spells and rituals that will help you have what you want in terms of love, money, success or revenge. It is mentioned that these spells and rituals are especially dangerous and even forbidden for summoning the darkness for their desires.
Combined vashikaran and jadu tona totka is one powerful magic that they believe in is strong enough to control the minds of people to get what you want. But these occult arts also have positive and negative effects to the user and the victim.
Vashikaran jadu tona totka is also utilized by desperate people who seek the perfect solution to their problems. It is a form of conjuring that deals with the solution of love issues, financial issues, career problems and family issues among others by manipulating the energies and vibrations that surround the person in question.
A person who will practice vashikaran jadu to na totka must have strong faith in occult science and its various spells and rituals. These practices are not for the weak because they require a lot of learning of how to work with people and circumstances at your command.
This is one of the most common vashikaran jadu tona totka method in which special chants and ceremonies are used to attract a particular person or make a person fall in love with you. This might involve the chanting of inspiring words, using perfumes and other offerings to the various gods and goddesses of love.
The most effective among vashikaran jadu tona totka is black magic to harm or even kill the opponent or competitor. It is widely acknowledged that these spells invoke demonic forces to inflict harm, disease or even death to the target. People are cautioned against wielding these powers since they are also harmful to the user.
vashikaran jadu tona totka does not have anything to do with the society or the religion as a whole. These are practices that are considered taboo and unethical since they involve manipulation of someone’s will. But for those who have faith in the occult and dare to take risks vashikaran jadu tona totka may be a source to full fill their dreams and wishes.
There is a multitude of personal reviews and experiences from people who claim to have tried this practice of vashikaran jadu tona totka and have seen positive results despite the general negativity about it. Some believe that the vashikaran jadu tona totka can be used for getting back a lost lover or attracting new ones, or even for wishing success and prosperity in some other aspect of life.
In a nutshell, vashikaran jadu tona totka is one of the most mystical and controversial practices there is out there. Many believe in it and many think that it is a myth but there is no arguing with the fact that people are intensely fascinated by its many uses that include vashikaran jadu tona totka. But such practices should be applied cautiously for they are harmful both to the practitioner and the target.
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I am a graduate in Business administration but recently wanted to switch careers to PR. And people always ask me why now and if I am so very passionate about it now why did I opt for business administration. So a very blunt answer is I had no clue. I always loved marketing but from where I come from only money making careers are appreciated. I got 0 support from anyone when it came to choosing a career path. My peers always went for generalised careers like CA or doctors or engineers. Now after working in meaningless jobs for a year I've realized to take the risk and go for something I have zero clue about but absolutely adore the field. Now you must be thinking if I have 0 clue how can I be passionate about it. I have a certain knowledge about the field. What it is. What it entails but I have zero experience, zero clue about where to start. I thought of getting a masters degree in it but I can't afford it abroad and my home country isn't an option. The internships I try for either asks me for experience or the job contains making tiktok videos or something like that. Where do I start?? And how do I build a meaningful career in PR. Lately I'm thinking of just dropping this plan now.