I sit alone in my room on the seventh floor, writing what will surely be my last will and testament. The heroin which allowed me to forget and to sleep for the last couple of years has lost its power to keep the screaming terrors away. The drug destroyed my body and mind, gradually eating away at them like a corrosive acid. Now I have become a slave to it. And yet, without it, I do not sleep for weeks, but instead continuously see the scenes from that terrible night running through my head on repeat as worsening waves of madness crash on the shores of my consciousness.
In the caverns under the town of Frost Hollow, I found the meaning of true madness. Ever since I escaped that den of horrors, it is difficult to tell what is real and what is only the feverish delirium of an unhinged mind.
Even now, they wait behind the door to this cheap, bare rented room. They drag their claws over the wood. I hear them hissing in that strange, ancient tongue, the one I first heard in the tombs of rock that had been undisturbed for countless millennia.
***
I had first heard rumors of an unexplored cavern from my friend, an experienced caver named Sonia who had explored caverns all over the world. I had been looking for some excitement in my life, some break from the constant monotony and boredom of simply working and sleeping. I had gone caving quite a few times over the year leading up to the trip, but I was not nearly as experienced and had never explored a supposedly virgin passageway of cavern before.
“How do you know no one’s gone down there?” I asked, curious. We sat across from each other at a local diner, getting some early breakfast before our planned descent. The sunrise was still another half-hour away, the sky flat and dark. We would be joined by Sonia’s husband, Phil, who would meet us there shortly after sunrise. I repressed an urge to yawn, chugging half of the steaming hot coffee in one long swallow. Sonia leaned close to me, her nearly colorless blue eyes reminding me of chunks of ice floating down a muddy stream.
“Phil’s friend just found it randomly,” she whispered before glancing around conspiratorially, as if she feared someone would care enough to eavesdrop on a conversation about a cave. “Well, it’s in the middle of a farm, and Phil’s friend, Jack Graysole, owns the entire property and surrounding woods. Jack says he noticed the cows kept going over to a certain spot in the field when it got really hot during the summertime. They would all gather around this little indentation in the grass. After seeing it a few times, Jack got curious and went to investigate what the cows were doing.
“He found a small hole in the ground, almost entirely covered by weeds and grass. He said he felt a cool breeze constantly blowing out of the hole, a breeze that smelled like burning matches and charred metal. After bringing out some shovels and digging down a couple feet, Jack realized that the hole wasn’t a hole at all, but the beginning of a steep passageway leading deep into the bowels of the earth.”
***
The owner of the land decided to unofficially call the newly-discovered cavern Graysole Caverns. Out of respect for him, this is also the name we all used. This is the story of how I found myself in the bowels of a strange subterranean tunnel, a tunnel where creatures beyond my comprehension slunk and hunted, skittering monstrosities who would be more at home in a nightmare.
After grabbing a couple coffees to take with us, Sonia drove over to Graysole Farms. Cows stood out in the grassy fields, huddled in tight circles as they repetitively chewed. The thin silhouette of Jack Graysole waited for us next to the herd. He had a face like a raisin, I thought to myself. I watched his thin, shaking body standing in the middle of an overgrown grassy field. Jack stared down blankly at something only he could see. Sonia and I started unloading some equipment from the car while we waited for Phil.
Once we had the backpacks loaded with some simple supplies, such as water, food, headlamps, rope, a couple extra batteries, some buck knives, and radios, we headed over to accompany Jack. We weren’t taking much, as we didn’t really expect to be down there for more than six or seven hours at the most.
Jack Graysole’s withered old face was as slack and expressionless as that of a corpse. He stared down at the ground as if he were in a trance, waving back and forth slowly on his feet like a plant in a light breeze.
“Jack?” Sonia called out as we approached. I could hear the man’s teeth chattering as we got nearer.
“Hey, what are you doing over here this early? You interested in accompanying us down there?” Sonia joked. But Jack might as well have been totally deaf for all the reaction he gave. Sonia glanced over at me with an anxious expression. I wondered if the old man was having a stroke.
I quickly walked over to where he stood, staring down at a black circular hole about three feet across directly in front of his feet. The entrance to Graysole Caverns stared up at us like a sightless pupil. As I drew within a few feet of Jack and looked straight into his blank eyes, I noticed something alarming.
His pupils were quickly dilating and constricting before my eyes. They would shrink to tiny pinpoints, then, a couple seconds later, rapidly expand until they became dark and serious. I could see his thready, rapid heartbeat pulsating in a vein on the side of his temple. Alarmed, I reached forward and put my hand on his shoulder.
Instantly, he came to life, like a man waking up from a nightmare. Shrieking, he looked at me with fully dilated pupils, reminding me of a panicked deer surrounded by wolves. His quavering old man’s voice shook with ineffable existential horror and mortal fear.
He took a step back away from us, seeming to realize where he was and what he was doing. He looked around, confused, then straight at me and Sonia. His eyes focused with anger and fear, as if we were demons here to drag him down to Hell. His eyes flicked back and forth between us constantly. Jack raised a trembling hand and pointed it straight at my heart.
“It’s you,” he said, his voice dropping to a harsh whisper. His teeth chattered despite the warm spring air. His skin looked deathly pale. “You’re the one who will bring an end to humanity, who will release the ruler of nightmares upon us.” He continued to point accusingly for a long moment at me, his face turning chalk-white. Then his eyes rolled up in his head. Slowly, he stumbled and fell backwards onto the soft grass of the field.
“Jack!” Sonia cried, running over to the old man. Jack’s breaths had started to come in slow, drawn-out gurgles, like a man with a slit throat trying to breathe. Frothy blood bubbled from his lips as they turned blue. Staring up at the endless expanse of cloudless sky, he exhaled one last shuddering breath and died.
***
Phil showed up only a couple minutes later. He found me and Sonia in a state of utter panic, both of us bent double over the still body of Jack. Sonia was on the phone with 911, and I was trying to give Jack chest compressions. The way his fingernails and lips shone with that cyanotic blue cast made me feel sick and weak. I knew it was futile, that I was simply playing with a corpse at this point, but I didn’t know what else to do. I felt if I didn’t do something, I might explode.
I heard the faint wailing of sirens approaching as Sonia’s panicked voice continued babbling to the 911 operator. Phil stood by her side, his tall, dark features searching and lost.
“Oh God, I think he’s dead!” Sonia cried over and over to the operator, as if she thought the operator could do anything about it. I didn’t hear what the operator said in response. As the ambulance pulled in, I gave up on chest compressions. I stood up and took a step back, looking sadly down on the kindly old man’s dead body.
The paramedics ran over. Phil, Sonia and I stood back while they worked on the corpse, trying to shock the heart back into life. But Jack’s open eyes stayed glazed as they stared sightlessly up into eternity.
***
The paramedics left. A couple police officers stayed behind to ask us a few routine questions. Eventually, after an hour or so, they left, too.
“What a fucked-up day,” Phil said, shaking his head grimly. “Do you guys still want to do this? Maybe it’s an omen from God telling us to go home.” Sonia and I exchanged a glance, then we both nodded at the same time.
“Definitely,” she said. “It’s sad what happened to Jack, but realistically, we don’t know what’s going to happen to this property now that he’s passed away. It might get sold or taken by the bank for all we know. This could be our one and only chance to explore this cave.”
“I don’t believe in omens. I’m still down,” I said, feeling slightly sick from the experience. I still remembered how Jack’s body had cracked under the weight of my chest compressions, how his ribs had snapped like bones shattering in greedy hands. “We’ll do it in memory of Jack. I plan to put this up on YouTube.” I pulled my GoPro out of my bag, turning it on. Phil groaned at that.
“Do we have any idea how far down this cave goes?” Phil asked. I felt a sense of relief now that the topic had changed from the death of the old man.
“I sent a little camera down on a rope, but it only went about a hundred feet,” Sonia responded. “It’s pretty steep at first, then it levels out. I couldn’t really see much after it leveled out, but it looks like it should be easy to climb down. There’s plenty of handholds, lots of jutting rocks.”
Phil put on his headlamp and small pack. As he crawled down into the hole, his tanned face looked up at us and gave us one last devilish grin. Once he had gone down a few dozen feet, Sonia started descending. She looked excited and happy. I noticed how she couldn’t stop smiling as she disappeared from view.
I watched their lights grow smaller and dimmer in the circular tunnel. I marveled at how perfectly circular the entrance was. It almost didn’t even look natural.
Taking a deep breath in, I followed my friends down into the dark.
***
“This isn’t too bad,” I said as I climbed down. The jutting rocks gave plenty of handholds and footholds for us. It wasn’t so tight that it felt like a coffin, either.
“It only gets easier from here!” Sonia called up.
“How do you know?” I asked. “You said you’ve never been here before.” She laughed.
“I know. Probably just wishful thinking,” she said. Far below us, Jack’s voice drifted up, faint and weak. He had already reached the bottom.
“The tunnel really opens up down here, guys,” he called. “It’s somewhat… bizarre, though.”
“What do you mean by that?” Sonia asked. I looked down, seeing Sonia and I would reach the bottom in seconds. “Forget it, I’ll let it be a surprise.” I heard her drop down. Slowly and carefully, I lowered myself down the last few feet. There was a short fall onto a smooth granite floor. I looked up, seeing what Phil and Sonia were so mesmerized by.
“Oh, wow,” I said, speechless. I blinked rapidly, wondering if the image would clear like a mirage. The tunnel was cut into a perfectly triangular shape, each side about seven feet long. The ceiling met in a point above our heads.
All along the smooth walls of gray rock, I saw thousands of black orbs peeking out. They looked similar to obsidian, but they were perfectly smooth and circular, each about the size of an orange. They were formed into interlocking diagonal patterns and followed the tunnel straight down as far as the eye could see.
“What is this place?” Sonia asked, taking a tentative step forward. I looked up, seeing the distant pinpoint of sunlight far above our heads. Our voices continued to echo off down the massive tunnels, disappearing in eerie waves into the thick curtain of shadows.
“Are you recording all this?” Phil asked me. I laughed, giddy.
“Of course! This is internet gold right here,” I said. “No one’s going to believe that this isn’t man-made, however. I can’t even believe it. Do you think Jack was playing a joke on us or something?”
“Jack had the sense of humor of a wet paper towel,” Phil whispered, shaking his head. “No, he wouldn’t do something like this.”
“Well, let’s go check it out,” Sonia said, taking a step forward. Her headlamp bobbed up and down rapidly, throwing dancing shadows through the triangular tunnel. It continued straight ahead, without the slightest deviation or curve, disappearing off into a dark point in the distance.
***
We walked as fast as we could, excited to see where, if anywhere, the strange tunnel led. Phil, always the conspiracy theorist, babbled excitedly.
“This has to be aliens, man,” he said, running his fingers through his dark hair. “I bet that scientists will find out this shit is millions of years old when we get back up and tell everyone. Maybe aliens came to earth in ancient times and made a bunch of stuff underground.” Gradually, as we walked, I noticed the tunnel opening up. The pointed triangular ceiling rose up higher above our heads and the walls moved outwards, as we were walking up a triangular funnel. At first, it was so subtle that I didn’t believe it when Sonia pointed it out.
“No, look,” she said, raising her hand above her head. “When we first started down this weird tunnel, my fingers were only maybe a foot away from the top. Now it’s a couple feet.” I was about to respond when our headlamps illuminated something standing in the middle of the tunnel.
“What the fuck is that?” I whispered, stopping cold in my tracks. Phil and Sonia looked up at the abomination at the same time. Its back was to us. It stood nearly as tall as the tunnel, which was now about twenty feet high.
The bottom half looked black and spidery with dozens of long, jointed legs. A bloody, white spine rose out of the mass of legs. Inhumanly long, skeletal arms stretched out in front of it. Its face was pointed away from us, but the back of its head resembled an enormous pointed skull with deep fissures like the cracks of an earthquake running through the bone. The abomination stayed as still as a statue, and for a long moment, I wondered if we were looking at some macabre work of art.
Then, suddenly, one of its insectile legs twitched. A moment later, the other legs started jerking and twisting. There was a sound like bones shattering as it rose up to its full height, turning around to face us.
Its face was like something from a nightmare, melting and reforming constantly like dripping candle wax. I would see a black eye appear on its forehead, then a grinning mouth on its chin, then the features would get sucked back into the folds of melting flesh. After a few moments, two enormous eyes appeared on its face, dark and cold like craters on the surface of the Moon. The mouths and noses disappeared back into the dripping skin, and only the two lidless eyes remained, emanating a cold, reptilian consciousness beyond the ability of my mind to comprehend. I felt terror radiating from its body like freezing waves.
“Free me,” it cried in a gurgling voice that seethed with insanity. It had a shrieking, metallic ringing behind every word that gave it an alien quality. “Free me, and I will give you the waters of eternal life. Within me, I contain the seeds of immortality. Within the nightmares, we live forever, always together, never alone.”
“Who are you?” I asked, terrified. The black reptilian skin of the enormous beast glistened as it knelt down, its massive face drawing near to mine. A sideways mouth burst out of the liquified flesh, showing hundreds of fangs growing like tumors from its white, bloodless gums. The fangs varied in size from only a couple inches to long, sword-like projections that stabbed into the creature’s flesh, causing white blood glittering with rainbows to fall like raindrops all around me.
“I have many names,” it hissed, its thousand voices rising and falling in crashing waves of sound. “I was present at the beginning, when this planet was no more than dead cliffs and endless freezing oceans. Those holy ones who search for us, the ancient ones, call me Niralahoth.”
“How do we free you?” Phil asked, looking terrified. He held Sonia’s hand tightly.
“By letting me into your mind and body,” Niralahoth cried, shaking the cavern. “I was thrown down here, cursed and forgotten. I cannot leave this place of shadows within this body. But in the body of another, my consciousness can be free, and the seeds of new life can spread beyond this prison.”
“There’s no way anyone’s going to do that,” I said, my eyes widening as Niralahoth’s reptilian skull turned towards me in fury. “I mean, you’re asking one of us to give up our individuality, our lives, right?”
“I am asking you to become one with me and gain power undreamt of by mortals,” it cried. “I have within me the fountain of life, the waters that send death away screaming.” I glanced anxiously at Phil and Sonia, wondering if we would have to run.
“The answer is no,” I said. “I’m sorry.”
“Yeah, we can’t do that,” Phil said, backing me up. “But, anyways, I think our trip has ended. It’s time to turn around…”
“You will never return,” Niralahoth cried, skittering away from us. “If you will not accept salvation, then you must accept death.” Within seconds, it slunk away from us, backpedaling on its many skittering legs into the shadows.
***
All around us, a rumbling started.
There was a pounding that crashed through the rock tunnel, as if an insane blacksmith were hammering on a massive anvil. The ringing of crashing rock started off slowly, with a few stones smashing down around us with heavy blasts of sound. Within seconds, the cacophony sped up, rising into a constant stream of destruction. The black orbs were spinning in place all up and down the tunnel, their glossy obsidian surfaces flashing with sparks of blue light.
“It’s collapsing!” Phil cried, running back in the direction we came, holding Sonia’s hand as she tried to keep up with him. I could only stare for a long moment, not sure what to do. It seemed that the direction Phil was heading stood closer to total collapse.
“Wait!” I cried, but my voice was drowned out in the destruction all around us. I felt a rock smash into my shoulder, sending me down to my feet. I heard Phil give a scream of pain, then another stone came down and smashed into my forehead. I remember seeing everything spinning around me as the world went black.
***
I awoke to find my headlamp still shining straight up in the dusty tunnel. Large chunks of the tunnel had slid out of place and crashed to the stone floor. The granite chunks that had fallen looked unnaturally smooth, most of them in the shapes of cylinders or cubes and varying in size from that of an egg to that of a small car.
My head throbbed. It felt as if a tight belt of fire were wrapped around my temples. Groaning, I put my fingers up to my forehead. They came away slick with blood.
Slowly, I started pushing myself up on my feet. I was relieved that nothing seemed broken. I had a deep gash running from the center of my scalp down to my left temple and some shallower cuts on my shoulders and back, but I knew none of that was life-threatening.
“Sonia?” I whispered, my voice coming out weak and strained. I reached into my pack and found a bottle of water. I chugged it quickly in one long swallow.
“Phil?” I cried again, this time stronger. I heard a soft weeping nearby. Staggering, I followed the sound.
Sonia was bloody and covered in cuts and scrapes, sitting next to Phil’s prone form. I saw Phil’s right arm pinned under a massive slab of granite. His arm disappeared from the elbow down in a spreading puddle of thick, dark blood.
“Oh God, Max, I think he’s hurt really bad,” she wept. Phil’s eyes rolled wildly in his head, his face pale and bloodless. I looked down the way we had come, seeing the entire tunnel blocked by large slabs of stone, many with strange, black orbs peeking out like the lenses of cameras.
***
I don’t know how much time passed. My phone died after a day, and then we were counting the endless darkness in breaths and tears.
Phil swam in and out of consciousness as his arm putrefied and blackened around the crush site. After a couple days, Sonia and I agreed that something had to be done. We told Phil we would need to amputate his arm. He was half-delirious, but he came back long enough to understand us and nod weakly.
We made a fire with Phil’s pack, trying to find fuel to throw in it to get it roaring. As it grew, I saw one of the black orbs near the flames abruptly ignite, as if it had been covered in gasoline. Blue, almost colorless flames rose from its surface. We started throwing the small black orbs on the fire until it rose high in the air. I sanitized the buck knife with the flames and pulled a rope tourniquet tight around Phil’s arm. He was conscious but seemingly insane, talking to himself more than anyone else.
“How are we going to get the car started without a key?” he gurgled to someone only he could see. “We need to look around. It has to be here somewhere.”
“Phil, can you hear me, bud? We need to fix your arm. We need to get you out of this mess. OK?” I said as comfortingly as I could. Phil’s eyes rolled wildly, but they didn’t meet my own. I sighed and looked over at Sonia.
“Let’s do it,” I said, giving a grim nod.
I pulled the buck knife out, slicing quickly down through the flesh next to the tourniquet. His veins throbbed like fat worms as the blackened, necrotic skin split easily under the blade, releasing a rancid-smelling gas that hissed out of the wound.
I couldn’t believe how hard it was to slice all the way through the arm. It felt like I was stuck in that hellish task forever. Phil’s eyes rolled in his head as his skin turned the color of clotted milk.
“God, Jesus, make it stop,” Phil whispered over and over, exhaling ragged, pain-filled breaths. The blood spurted from the blackened, dying tissue all over the dust-covered cavern floor, covering my hands in its warm, slick embrace.
After what was probably only three or four minutes, but felt like hours, I had sliced all the way down to the bone. The infected tissue of his arm spurted great gouts of orange pus mixed with rivulets of blood. The hard part was over.
Standing up, I took my steel-toe sneaker and stomped down on his arm as hard as I could. Phil cried out in a powerful voice, as if all the agony and suffering in the world was contained in that one shriek. The bone snapped under my weight with a sound like a tree branch cracking. A moment later, Phil rolled away from the rock that had pinned me in place for so long. Something alien and spongy was shoved into my face, a mass of destroyed red tissue pulsating in time with a runaway heartbeat. At first, shell-shocked and revolted, my mind couldn’t comprehend that I was looking at the stump of Phil’s mutilated arm. I hardened my heart and forced the giddiness and madness to the back of my mind. The time had come to cauterize the wound.
“Sonia, give it to me,” I said with a tremor in my voice. I reached out a hand towards her, a hand stained with Phil’s blood. It looked as if I were wearing a wet, crimson glove. Sonia only stared blankly at me for a long moment, however. A surge of anger ran up my chest.
“Sonia, toughen the fuck up! He’s going to die if you just sit there!” I swore at her, hearing my deep, angry voice bounce around the caverns. Sonia pulled back, as if she were struck. Inwardly, I cursed having a woman as my only able-bodied companion in this situation. She was a competent enough caver, but what would happen if violence and blood came over us? What would happen if, or more realistically when, we needed to fight?
Grimly, Sonia leaned forward and yanked the burning black orb out of the roaring fire, handing it to me on the end of a buck knife that had just barely pierced its hard, strange exterior. The handle of the knife felt coarse and splintery under my filthy skin. I put it to the spongy stump of Phil’s arm. The stump twitched violently. Phil tried to pull away as black smoke rose from the burning flesh.
There was a smell like bacon sizzling. The searing meat of Phil’s arm blackened and crisped under the heat of the orb, which had become no more than a cylinder of glowing blue embers by this point. I felt simultaneously sick and giddy. I didn’t know if I wanted to laugh or vomit. I felt like I was on the verge of some kind of madness, that the stress and insanity of the experience had started to shatter my mind.
His eyes rolled back in his head and he appeared to go into a seizure for a few seconds. With a long exhalation of breath, he finally, mercifully, lost consciousness. It’s hard to admit it, even this close to the end, but a small, sick piece of me was jealous of Phil. Most likely, he would be dead soon, maybe within hours, while Sonia and I would slowly starve and dehydrate like animals over a period of weeks. I looked at her lithe body and soft skin, seeing the feminine curves of her hips and chest. She was a beautiful woman. I knew Phil to be a lucky man. At least, before this trip, he was.
I watched her body, wondering if I had what it took to eat her or Phil if I had to. Did I have an iron heart that would allow me to slice into my friends and consume their raw, cold flesh? Perhaps, by that point, it would be hunger and madness driving me forward, and I wouldn’t even hesitate. I shuddered at the very thought.
***
I fell asleep that night, having strange dreams of massive gods with melting faces sitting in judgment in a circle around me. We had very little food or water left. No one knew we were down here. Rescue was not coming.
When I awoke, I found myself alone. Phil had died from his injuries while I slept, the black streaks of septic shock spreading up his arm towards his heart. His eyes stared sightlessly up at the rock ceiling.
“Sonia?” I called out, my heart racing as I sat up. “Where are you?” My headlamp was growing dim. I looked in my pack, realizing I was on the last of my batteries. I saw a silhouette walking out of the darkness, the thin, pale form of Sonia. She was trembling badly.
“I saw them,” she said. “Niralahoth and its priests. The priests aren’t human. They look reptilian with sideways mouths and too many eyes.” She shuddered.
“Why would you do that?” I asked. Her eyes grew distant.
“You know we’re not getting out of here alive,” she said. “Not on our own. I wanted to see what it offered. It says that if we take a piece of its nightmare into us, we will gain the power to leave this place, that it simply wants to see the surface and spread its nightmares there.” I shook my head.
“Insanity,” I muttered. “We’d be better off dead.” Sonia nodded.
“My thoughts exactly,” she responded grimly. I didn’t realize what she meant until the next day, when I woke up and found her hanging next to Phil’s body, her tongue swollen and blue as it poked out of her cyanotic lips. And then I was truly alone.
***
Soon after Sonia committed suicide, the last of the batteries for the headlamp died. I had run out of food and had only a small sip of water left. I don’t know how much time passed in the darkness, starving and raving, following the tunnel by running my hands over the walls. I heard many things skittering in the darkness, and a few times, I heard the demonic voice of Niralahoth as it split and distorted.
“You are on death’s door,” it hissed. “Will you not drink from the fountain of life?” I couldn’t tell where the voice came from in the maddening blackness. It seemed to come from everywhere and nowhere. I had lost nearly all of my sanity in that pit of shadows by this point. I tried laughing constantly to keep my spirits up, and when that failed, I simply cried.
“I’ll do it,” I wailed. “I’ll do it. Just let me see the sky again. Get me out of here, Niralahoth.” Everything went deathly silent all around me, then a laugh rang out like the grinding of glass.
In front of me, I saw a tornado of fire descending from the ceiling, surrounding the massive, spidery form of Niralahoth. It rose its skeletal arms upwards, as if it were Zeus calling down lightning. In the sudden brightness, I saw the fiery form of snakes slithering and centipedes skittering forwards in that tornado, each massive creature sculpted from flames in the spinning cyclone of energy. Niralahoth reached into the tornado of fire with its sharp points of fingers and plucked something small from it. The fire instantly dissipated. In its hand, I saw a tiny, swirling orb that looked like it contained a firestorm within it.
“The nightmare seed,” Niralahoth gurgled as it skittered forward towards me. I could only stare, open-mouthed and starving. I hadn’t slept for days, it felt like, and everything seemed slow and unreal.
In a blur, its skeletal arm shot out and forced the orb into my mouth. Despite the fire raging within it, it felt freezing cold. As it touched my tongue, it gave off a sensation like frostbite all throughout my mouth. I screamed and tried spitting it out, but it seemed to have a mind of its own. It started liquifying, dripping down my throat.
I felt something cancerous and sick spreading throughout my body, radiating out from my heart and stomach to every inch of it. I tried to scream, but it caught behind my teeth. I fell to my knees, clawing at my face as that insane, alien laugh continued resounding all down the tunnel. I fell unconscious and woke up under a beautiful sky in the fields of Graysole Farms.
***
Soon after, I realized that my life would never be the same. Everywhere I went, I could hear the wailing voice of Niralahoth. Behind the trees, I always saw skittering shadows, creatures with long, spidery legs that stalked me every day and night. I slept with every light in the house turned on, yet when I woke up, they would all be shut off, and I would find myself in darkness, next to something in the bed with far too many legs and a face that dripped like burning wax.
I sold everything I owned and tried to move far away, to give as much distance between myself and those cursed caverns as I could, but the nightmares followed me like a shadow. I realize what a fool I was in those ephemeral moments of madness. Sonia was much wiser than myself; I should have killed myself or died rather than allowing that thing inside of me.
Even now, I can feel it creeping through my heart, spreading through my blood. I feel it trying to crawl its way out of my throat, the thin, black legs peeking out at the back of my esophagus.
I only hope that, when I finally jump and feel my bones shatter against the concrete far below, I will kill whatever is inside of me. For I fear the consequences for the world if it were to escape.

Why should cars be allowed to travel beyond allowed legal speed. It will not solve all problems, maybe some we can solve with this

We just got married and had ourselves a DIY wedding. Selling some of our decor for anyone looking for their own wedding or event!
https://denver.craigslist.org/fod/denver-wedding-event-craft-items-fo7749116461.html
**Items are still available unless marked as SOLD. Must pick up. Located in SW Denver. Payment accepted by Venmo, Zelle or cash
Table Scape Items
16 silver table sign holders (10”) - $10 for all
10 royal blue round cocktail table cloths (132”) - $60 for all
12 dark blue cheese cloth table runners (10ft) - $30 for all
1 box scented dried rose petals - light purple, magenta, yellow - $5
1 box dyed sola wood flowers - blue, pink, orange, yellow, purple (colors can be sold separately) - $10 for full box
Candles and Holders
5 dark blue taper candles (10”) - $5 for all
17 hot pink taper candles (10”) - $15 for all
6 light blue taper candles (12”) - $5 for all
5 light pink taper candles (12”) - $5 for all
6 glass cylinder vases (6” tall, 3” wide) - $10 for all
60 unused tea lights - $10 for all
23 curvy clear taper candle holders (2”) - $15 for all
20 glass cylinder tealight holders (2.5” tall, 2” wide) - $20 for all
30 wine bottle corks for alternating candle height (can be cut up) - FREE
Disco Balls
40 pieces hanging mirror disco balls (4”, 3.2”, 2”) - $20 for all
2 disco balls (12”) - $25 for all
8 disco balls (8”) - $45 for all
4 disco balls (10”) - $35 for all
Miscellaneous Decor
8 sheer silver sequin curtain panels (8ft tall, 2ft wide) - $35 for all
75 bubble wands with dinosaurs and stars on top (4”) - $40 for all
1 velvet teal ring box - $10
1 Bride tote bag - $10
1 wedding ring inflatable pool floaty - $10
4 fake flower bouquets (ribbons removed easily) - FREE

So I’m about 3.5 weeks post-op from having an orange-sized benign cyst removed from an ovary (the ovary survived). Given its size it had to be removed from a 3 inch abdominal incision instead of laparoscopically, and it was expected that things would be weird for a while given my organs needed to kind of fall back into place after being squished, and of course my body got thrown off by pain relievers and anesthetic etc.
I have IBS-C like 90% of the time (diarrhea makes a surprise appearance occasionally) which I manage fairly well if I stay on top of my miralax and colace regimen and avoid trigger foods/overeating. Obviously in the days immediately after surgery it was not great thanks to the opioids, as I did take all 12 prescribed pills of oxycodone over 4 days because I was in a decent amount of pain (having abdominal muscles cut is no joke). A double dose of miralax and a couple glasses of prune juice got things moving albeit uncomfortably.
However, around week 2 of my recovery, I was doing pretty well — eating normally and having normal bathroom habits (for me anyway). But I guess something(?) happened during week 3 and I’ve taken a turn for the worse, despite not really changing much in my routine.
I’m having some symptoms I usually don’t have: - reduced appetite 24/7 - bowel/gas pain during a meal, not just after - bowel movements where I feel constipated but what comes out is Bristol type 5 - tons of stomach gurgling and gas that is mostly unresponsive to anti-gas and acid reducer medication - dull headaches (but no fever) - lower back pain that comes and goes - keep waking up sweatier than is typical.
I’m used to feeling bloated but not used to my bowel movements being so soft and in small amounts at the same time.
Has anyone else had any whacked out digestion in weeks following a procedure? It was only day surgery, and I didn’t take any antibiotics following the surgery. I’ve been off opioids for almost 3 weeks. I will say I might have overdone it with ibuprofen as I was taking it prescription strength daily for close to 3 weeks, but I haven’t had any for about 5 days now and don’t feel any better other than my headaches being less severe. I also thought it might be caused by my period but it ended 2 days ago and I am still having unusual gut symptoms.
Basically wondering if this has occurred with anyone else and if so what did you do? I was hoping to try some things on my own first since my bills from the hospital are really piling up and more doctor visits this month would be financially difficult. I have called my GYN but they were dismissive and said come back in a month if it gets worse.
Part of me wonders if it’s pelvic floor dysfunction? But would that cause gas? I don’t know. Could the ibuprofen have wrecked my whole GI tract?

Thinning the herd a bit. Shipping included within US. Paypal F&F or Zelle only. Looking to recoup some funds spent on other things so no trades.
Timestamp
Hinderer Eklipse Bowie in Stonewashed with Orange G10 scale - $380 Edge Condition: Factory, unused that I am aware of. Ownership: Second Centering/Lockup: Looks good on both to me, see video. Body Condition: Body look good to me. Box and papers: In box with triway parts/etc. Previous owner sent me the wrong box so just has what it is written on the box. Modifications: No Disassembled: Yes - Put a ti scale on it and lubed with gunny glide, then moved that ti scale to another knife and put the g10 back on prior to selling. Video Pic 1 Pic 2
(SOLD) ProTech Malibu Operator - $200 (SOLD) (SOLD) Demko AD20 user - $380 (SOLD)
Thanks!

Introduction

Aesthetic gifts that make a home seem better are always appreciated, whether for a housewarming party or a special event. Well-selected pieces of gifting may provide any living area beauty, cosiness, and individuality. If you're looking for ideas to gift your loved ones with items to decorate their home, consider these delightful gift ideas to add an aesthetic appeal to any home.
Discover fashionable pieces that instantly elevate any house, from trendy accessories to cosily decorated rooms. With these essential house presents; you may give your home a stylish makeover.

Top Gift ideas to give your home an aesthetic appeal

Decorating your home can be a real pain, but with this blog it doesn't have to be! If you're looking to gift some one special an aesthetic gift, check out these easy gift ideas that'll have your place looking magazine-worthy in no time:
1. Shivaji Maharaj On Singhasan in Black by Satguru’s- A brave Maratha king named Shivaji Maharaj repelled the Mughal invasion of western India in the sixteenth century BC. Check out the beautiful Shivaji statue seated on Singhasan. This striking resin statue of the Maratha king has a sleek black finish, giving it a regal look that is perfect for home décor. The beautiful piece is a symbol of pride and caution. Bring back history and traditional touch to your home with this statue of Shivaji Maharaj by enhancing a sophisticated touch to your interior design.

1. Ganesh idol By Satguru’s- A Ganesh idol for a gift can significantly improve a space's aesthetic appeal when added as a gift for the house. An intricately carved Ganesh figurine placed in a central location, such as a mantelpiece or side table, may instantly provide spiritual energy and a feeling of cultural depth to the space. These elaborate statues are available in various materials, from shiny brass to delicate porcelain, so you may select one that precisely matches the current décor. In addition to being extremely beautiful, a Ganesh idol can act as a daily reminder to the owner to remain upbeat, concentrated, and receptive to new experiences.

3. Brass Elephant Urli By Satguru’s- Any space's aesthetic appeal can be immediately enhanced by adding brass hanging diyas. These ornamental oil lamps offer vintage beauty and a warm, comforting glow. The brass's deep golden colour immediately draws the eye and gives the surroundings a hint of refinement. With an elephant structure welcoming, these hanging diyas can be hung in alcoves, stairwells, and entryways to create a captivating atmosphere that instantly sets the tone. They may also be eye-catching accents that improve a room's overall design. Brass-hanging diyas add a touch of classic sophistication and mix effortlessly with modern and traditional living spaces.

4. Mudra Buddha In Orange Finish by Satguru’s- A meditating Buddha statue can significantly improve any space's aesthetic appeal. These sculptures create an ideal relaxing atmosphere by instilling a sense of mindfulness and tranquillity. Placing a Buddha statue in your living room, bedroom, yoga studio, or even outside your garden brings an instant touch of elegant Eastern design. The Buddha figure's delicate craftsmanship and serene demeanour immediately grab your attention and beckon you to take a moment to relax and discover your core. Furthermore, the statue's warm, earthy tones go well with various decor themes, from rustic bohemian to modern minimalist. It's easy to bring some zen into your area and make it feel like a sanctuary.

Wrapping Up

Giving presents that improve a home's visual appeal is a way to express gratitude and help your loved ones furnish a place that suits their tastes and individuality. Many options include wall art to beautify their walls, charming and cozy decorative accents, and valuable products that encourage functionality and organisation.
With a variety of gift shops online nowadays, Satguru's is a must-visit online store for all your gift needs.
https://satgurus.com/

Root touch up
Hi,
I’m looking for a good recommendation for dark brown root touch up for grey hairs, a marker applicator or stick etc. I used one before that worked fine but it isn’t sold anymore and the one I just bought is way too heavy and turns hair slightly orange, plus is hard to get out in the wash
Can I have a recommendation for a good one I can get online that you may of used or know of that doesn’t cause these problems. Thanks!

Article 370 made sure that the kashmiri demographics aren't changed until a plebiscite is held.
Now, I want to start a discourse on how systematically things are being changed here. Article 370 sort of protected us. Clearly land and more real estate is being sold to mainland India. One can visibly see the mediocre Indian urban style peeping into Kashmir. I am KP, never been to kashmir, cant speak kashmiri either! My family never visited kashmir out of fear, mostly propagated by media. I have missed my chance to see kashmir in its somewhat pristine state. Now its gonna become just like Hyderabad, Ahmedabad or Delhi, inevitably. Indian average temperatures are rising alarmingly, because they destroy ecology in the name of development (before any indian troll comes at me, you being a developing country is non-excuse given advances made by e/acc)
Can we start a discourse on this? Please share some educative material on this! Kashmiri need to have a forum and reddit is quite safe in that regards!
We read that kashmiri land is being sold in order to make bhavans or whatever!

In terms of popular significance of personality, Modi is perhaps most obvious after Nehru.
However, unlike Nehru,
He does not dare jump in midst of religious riots to stop them, instead, he causes them
He works directly against basic reasoning and scientific temper, the most significant ideas of Nehruvian thought.
He can never even conduct a press conference, let alone write against himself anonymously like Nehru did when he first got power in provinces.
He and his Home Minister are hell bent on dividing India. Unlike Sardar Patel (and VP Menon) who pledged unwavering loyalty to Nehru most significant in making an impossible nation possible.
He meddles in international affairs, claims to stop wars, openly advocates a particular candidate in USA during visit (Aabki Bar Trump Sarkar, Modi said before 2020 elections in US). Unlike Nehru, whose idea of Non-Alignment marked a revolution in international geopolitics and is the bedrock of the Indian diplomacy today.
He locks away opposition, makes ridiculous hateful claims about them. Unlike Nehru, who twice in writing had said Vajpayee will become PM. Who spent 10 years in jail and did not plead to Brits. Who wrote brilliant pieces of literature like Discovery of India and Glimpses of World History while in jail
He cannot take any critism, unlike Nehru, whom a young poet accused of having sold the nation at his face and he laughed. Whom Vajpayee said had a bit of Churchill and Chamberlain in, and Nehru praised his speeech.
Most significantly, he, can never be truly significant in terms of anti-colonialism (Nehru being the first in pre-independence INC to demand absolute freedom from British), instead he worships Britishers' lapdog Savarkar and comes from an organization that stood against the Quit India Movement and refused to hoist the Indian flag on Independence (the RSS).

Developed an irregular hb somewhere around 2 weeks ago. Keep in mind I am a chronic weed smoker, mostly vape, for over 10 years.
All of these items were purchased in bulk and consumed by myself within the last several months. Safe to say I’ve been binging really bad. But I do not ever do this. This is the first time I’ve ever selfishly binged on junk food to this magnitude.

Synopsis:
An engineer in another world—blending science and magic to achieve greatness in a world where skills and levels reign supreme.
—
Ethan was just a plain old engineer, but everything changed when he was reborn into a world of skills, levels, and magic. With his advanced knowledge far ahead of the time period he finds himself in, this new reincarnated life will be much different than his last, especially because he can construct, deconstruct, and reconstruct runes—something no one else can do.
But with royal politics, looming tax collectors, a mountain of debt, dungeon incursions, cults, and hostile fantasy races mixing together into a cocktail of bullshit that threatens to bury his dreams; Ethan must bridge the gap between steel and sorcery to grow stronger. — Runecrafting is slow burn. — What to Expect: - Weak to very strong progression - Hardcore wish fulfillment - A balance of action, kingdom building, and runecrafting. - MC will trigger an industrial revolution, revolutionize magic, modernize agriculture, communication, commerce, textile production, education, transportation, sanitation, weapons manufacturing, leisure & entertainment, and medicine.
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Chapter 03

-1-
"Business opportunity?" Jack blinked, amused. "Intriguing. One doesn't often hear a noble propose such a thing to a [Necromancer]."
Roland shifted uncomfortably.
Ignoring him, Ethan leaned back in his chair.
"Let's just say these are unorthodox times, Jack. And frankly, the problems plaguing Holden call for equally unorthodox solutions." He gestured towards a nearby chair. "Do have a seat, and allow me to elaborate. It concerns a matter of public health, and specifically, a rather lackluster product currently on the market. One common folk cannot even afford."
Jack raised an eyebrow, taking the offered seat. "Public health and [Necromancy]? This does get more interesting by the moment, my lord."
Ethan leaned forward again.
"I'll be blunt. It's the Blight, Jack. You're undoubtedly familiar with its unpleasant effects." He wrinkled his nose slightly. "The lethargy, the nausea…and the frankly horrendous stench that clings to the afflicted."
"The Blight has stages, my lord. But yeah, I get the gist. Though, I confess, raising the recently departed isn't exactly..."
Ethan chuckled. "Not quite, my friend. While your talents with the departed are impressive, I have a different skillset in mind. One that involves cleanliness."
Jack's smile vanished, replaced by a wary arch of an eyebrow. "Cleanliness? You want a [Necromancer] for scrubbing floors?"
Ethan leaned back in his chair, steepling his fingers. "Not scrubbing floors, precisely. What do you know about the Blight, Jack?"
"It's more than a mere sickness, my lord. It's a clinging parasite that latches onto the unfortunate soul and slowly devours their life force. The early signs are subtle—a sickly sweet odor, lethargy, pale clammy skin."
Jack shuddered dramatically, and continued. "Then comes the hunger. An insatiable craving that gnaws at their insides. The victims start developing a craving for raw flesh instead. Their mere touch becomes corrupting, causing plants to wilt and wounds to fester. Disembodied whispers of the spirits torment them, sapping their willpower—they're like a sweet escape from their suffering. It chips away at their will to fight, turning them inward until they become shells of their former selves."
Ethan blinked. Jack had a knack for theatrics and being dramatic, it seemed.
"In the final stages, the body decays into a walking corpse driven by an unquenchable hunger to consume the life force of others."
"Okay, stop," Ethan raised his hand with a sigh. "Who does the Blight infect?"
Jack took a deep breath. "That's the interesting part, my Lord. The Blight only seems to affect those with little to no mana. It's like mana acts as a shield. Majority of peasants are mana-less. It's a common disease, my lord. Even nobles suffer from the Blight; mostly children given that their mana is still developing."
"So, mana is our solution?" Ethan raised an eyebrow. "Why do you think no one's arrived at this conclusion given that the Blight is such a common occurrence you'd think there'd be a cure?"
"There is a cure, my lord. But—"
"It's way too expensive."
"Indeed, that is correct, my lord."
"Regardless, our solution here is sanitation. You see, the Blight thrives in filth. The stench, the lethargy, it all stems from a miasma that festers in unsanitary conditions. It eats on people's lifeforce. And the current concoction on the market does little to combat it. There's a simple solution—people are aware of it—but sadly, it's expensive, not as effective as it should be, and frankly, an insult to hygiene."
"Oh, are you talking about soap, my lord?"
"Soap," Ethan confirmed. "More specifically, newly made soap. As soap's made with magic here, it has slight mana in it—although it's a different matter altogether that said mana dissipates. Regardless, if bought new and used, it helps with the Blight. However, we need better soap. The current offerings are woefully inadequate, and at exorbitant prices. I envision a mass-produced, affordable soap that can combat the Blight's effects, doesn't lose mana, and can invigorate people."
Jack considered this for a moment. "And why, my lord, would a noble like yourself be concerned with such mundane matters?"
"Jack," Ethan's eyes narrowed slightly, his tone turning icy. "I believe you forget yourself. It is not your place to question nobility. I suggest you remember your place and focus on the task at hand."
Jack's face turned ashen. He quickly lowered his eyes. "I apologize, my lord."
"You are forgiven." Ethan didn't particularly enjoy being a noble, but now that he was one, he needed to maintain certain boundaries.
Though Ethan had been slightly taken aback, Jack was right. Nobles seldom cared about peasants. Even less when it came to the Blight. Any and all solutions currently available for this very normal cause of death were expensive. Current brick they sold as 'soap' was inadequate, had pathetic fragrance, and performed even less when it came to hygiene. So, most peasants die due to lack of money. They couldn't buy soap, and the concoction for the Blight was too expensive.
But I don't really think like the nobles, as I am not one.
Silence stretched between the two for several long moments, and in that silence, Ethan considered the consequences.
The consequences of Ethan's plan would be far-reaching. There definitely would be a political firestorm. Soapmakers, likely well-established guilds with ties to influential nobles, would see their profits plummet and their influence challenged. They'd spread rumors about Ethan's soap being inferior or even dangerous, and might even resort to sabotage, threats, blackmail, or the like. Ethan might also face resistance from other barons who profit from the inflated price of Blight remedies.
I need to be prepared for whatever they throw at me, 'cause they definitely will.
Beyond the immediate political struggle, there could be social unrest. Slower, more expensive production methods often employ a larger workforce given that [Mages] weren't always available to make soap. There had to be a manual process discovered by the [Mages] of this world—though having tried the soap himself, it was quite lacking.
Ethan's plans for mass-produced soap could lead to unemployment among those currently making soap. He'd need to be prepared to address these concerns, perhaps by retraining displaced workers or offering them jobs in the new production facilities. Though, then again, the guilds he'd poach the unemployed people from wouldn't take it lightly.
Regardless, I need to do it. Fuck the guilds. I don't think Theo's dad will let anything happen to him—aka me now.
Theo's family was rather big. His father, Lord Alexander Lockheart, was arguably ruthless and cold, but he usually held his family's interest in his mind—knowing him and his militaristic nature, Ethan didn't doubt he'd latch onto the opportunities to make some hefty sum of money—money which he could use to fund his militaristic endeavors. The man was ambitious.
*Theo's the 4***^th child of the Lockhearts. Even aside from Theo's dad, he's got five siblings: three older and two younger siblings. Two of whom, I can easily rely on. The eldest sibling, Maximillian, or Juliana, who is the second eldest. Benson's the third child, and he doesn't like me much, so Maximillian and Juliana are my only hope—though they're kind of disappointed in how Theo behaved, they wouldn't let something happened to me*, especially knowing that I, "Theodore Lockheart", am turning over a new leaf. Not to mention Theo's mom's too soft.*
Knowing his safety wouldn't be an issue, Ethan looked at Jack. He had only spoken like Theo to make sure he could set a proper boundary with Jack. Deciding that the awkward silence had gone for far too long, he spoke with a lighter tone.
"Though, if you must know, the Blight doesn't discriminate. It cripples the poor, yes, but it also weakens soldiers and undermines trade. A healthy populace is a productive populace, one that can pay taxes and contribute to the well-being of the entire barony. Besides," he added, a sly smile returning, "imagine the profit. Affordable, effective soap for all? It would be a goldmine. I'm especially looking forward to the reaction of noblewomen. They'll be in a frenzy. They'll be begging for this soap. We'll be swimming in coin."
Which I need given the looming tax and Holden's fucked up financial situation...
Unaware of what was going through Ethan's mind, Jack tapped his chin thoughtfully. "And, with all due respect, my lord, why do you need my help? What possible use could a [Necromancer] have in the realm of soap-making?"
Ethan leaned back, a smile playing on his lips. "While your skills in manipulating life force are undoubtedly impressive, Jack, it's your less publicized talent I'm particularly interested in."
Jack's eyes narrowed for a moment. "You mean...?"
"Imbuement." Ethan said.
Ethan wasn't too sure, but given that [Necromancers] and [Witches] were infamous classes, he'd heard rumors. They often imbued objects. Corpses in [Necromancers'] case and certain objects in [Witches'] case. It wasn't mana that they imbued exactly, but something else—which he had no clue about—that let them have control over the corpse/object they imbued. But, given that these two classes were the most affordable ones that could imbue anything at all and were experts in that regard, Ethan was pretty sure Jack could achieve his goal.
That was his theory, of course. It all depended on how long they could hold the mana inside the soap. Making the soap affordable and high quality—that he could handle. Keeping the mana within it, though, and getting some decent returns? Well, that depended a lot on Jack.
Jack ran a nervous hand through his scraggly brown hair, his eyes glinting.
"What if we could imbue the soap with mana?" Ethan said. "It would disrupt the Blight's ability to feed on life force. Think of it as a sort of 'static' that interferes with the Blight's 'signal'. So, we imbue mana into soap."
Jack frowned, considering this. "That's an interesting idea, my lord. But how would we create such a thing? Soap is expensive to make; you would have to employ mages—"
"Leave the soap to me. Deal with imbuing mana instead. As a [Necromancer], you have a unique understanding of life force and how it can be manipulated. I believe that with your help, we can develop a method to imbue soap with mana that stays in for as long as possible—you are the expert in imbuement, after all. The soap would then not only clean the body, but also create a sort of protective barrier against the Blight." He leaned back in his chair, watching Jack's reaction closely. "So, what do you think? Are you up for it?"
-2-
Ethan hummed as the carriage came to a stop near the house where those infected by the Blight were being kept under quarantine, in the company of Roland. The house wasn't luxurious by any means, it was quite small really. But it had been secured to allow them to observe the tainted. Ethan exited the carriage along Roland and Jack, and soon they were greeted by a tall, slender man in robes.
"Ah, Lord Theodore. It is my utmost pleasure to meet your esteemed self." the robed man bowed. His voice was even, but there was a wariness there—clearly, the man was not comfortable dealing with Ethan, or more like, Theodore who was infamous for his... nature.
Ethan wasn't happy with how the people of Holden and everyone acquainted with Theo regarded him, a reputation that likely spread more than just this town, but he couldn't do anything about it. Logically, he'd just need to deal with it one step at a time.
"No need to be so tense... Sir Miller." Ethan briefly checked his memory to bring up the information of the man.
Miller was the head physician of Holden.
"Esteemed guest," The man was still bowing, clearly uncomfortable and unable to bring himself to stand straight before a notorious lord such as Theodore. "Do not concern yourself with trivial manners and come in. The tainted have been secured, and preparations made, so please, this way."
The man led Ethan inside and after crossing through an empty room, they reached a space sectioned off by iron grills. A group of men armed with spears surrounded the door from the outside—they were armed with spears so they could deal with anyone that reached the third stage and became a brain-dead zombie without getting near them. The tall and burly men eyed Roland and Ethan, on alert at a noble's presence.
Ethan covered his face in a mask, stepped over the grills, into the open hall with rows of beds lining both sides, where about ten people lay, most on their back. If they noticed their Lord, the people lying on the bed didn't act like they noticed anything. "Please, Lord Theodore...!" Miller said. "You mustn't get near!"
"Nothing to worry, I won't be tainted," Ethan said. He was a [Mage] after all, and unranked one, but a mage nonetheless. He looked at the patients one by one.
They do look sickly... it is one thing hearing about it, but this is far more eye opening... Sighing, Ethan turned around and walked out.
"Jack, do your thing."
"Yes, my lord." Jack said as Ethan made it to Roland.
"Roland, we need to go to the Deadwoods, you and I."
Roland appeared apprehensive but did not question Ethan's intentions.
As Ethan and Roland walked out, Jack got started on the subjects. Ethan looked ahead. Grassy meadows stretched far and wide, dotted by occasional trees and bushes. The sun's golden rays washed over the land, leaving an orange tinge on the distant mountains. To the west of Holden lay the Deadwoods—easily spotted, as it stood as an ominous expanse of darkness in the otherwise brightly lit region. A mountain range stretched behind the Deadwoods and clung to the earth, meeting the borders of Corinth.
Ethan had to admit, the place was a sight to see despite how much the Deadwoods stood out like a sore thumb amidst all this greenery. Even then, the Deadwoods held a unique allure. Ethan got into the carriage with Roland in tow, then with a light jolt the carriage started moving. It was being pulled by two horses.
"With all due respect, my Lord, this seems unwise, no?"
"It'll be fine," Ethan reassured. "We have guards with us, and I have you to protect me."
"Why, is it not better to simply let us know what you require so we may fetch it in your stead?"
Ethan smiled, but didn't answer.
The Deadwoods soon came closer as the carriage sped up, drawing near to a stretch of meadows with trees scattered every few paces or so.
The carriage rattled as it went over a particularly large bump. Ethan gave a quick glance at Roland—the man had grown quieter since their departure. Clearly, he was contemplating what sorts of heinous plans his new lord had in store.
Suddenly, the carriage lurched to a halt. Ethan poked his head out of the window and called, "What's the hold-up?"
The driver gave an apologetic bow. "There's a large rock in the road, my lord."
"Then have the guards get rid of it." Ethan's voice carried a subtle note of annoyance. He really didn't have time for delays—as a rule of thumb, he usually hated them.
"My lord," Roland said. "It's a trap. We're under attack."
An arrow slammed right beside Ethan's head the next instant.
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Patreon Discord

I am in need of advice on improving my job application process and understanding what I might be missing or doing wrong. Despite having a strong educational background and relevant experience, I have been facing rejections from the positions I apply to. Below is a summary of my qualifications and experience. I would greatly appreciate any feedback or suggestions you can provide.
Summary: I am an experienced Quality Assurance Analyst with a strong foundation in Computer Science Engineering. I have a proven track record in significantly reducing bugs in software projects and am proficient in both manual and automated testing. My programming expertise includes C#, C++, and Java. I also hold multiple certifications in software testing and project management.
Education:

• Manchester Metropolitan University, United Kingdom MSc in Computer Games Development 09/2023 – 10/2024
  • Relevant Coursework: C++ and C#, Project Management, Jira, GitLab
• SRM University, India B. Tech in Computer Science Engineering 08/2019 – 07/2023
  • Relevant Coursework: C, C++, Software Engineering, Java, HTML, MySQL, Object-Oriented Analysis and Design

Experience:

• Byte Orange QA Intern Manchester (Online) 08/2023 – 03/2024
  • Performed QA for FusionOS, an OS developed for the Microsoft Imagine Cup
  • Reduced bugs in the First India Platform by 80% through extensive bug testing

Projects:

• RPG Format Manchester Metropolitan University 01/2024
  • Led development and QA, including writing core game code and creating UI
  • Integrated controller support
• ICARUS VR SRM University 04/2023
  • Led development, provided documentation, and used scrum methodology
  • Ensured stable 120 FPS to prevent motion sickness

Certifications:

• Atlassian Agile Project Management Professional Certificate 04/2024
• Lambda Test Software Testing Professional Certificate 04/2024
• Programming Foundations: Software Testing/QA 01/2024
• Understanding Manual Testing 01/2024
• Unreal Engine Blueprint Game Developer 09/2022
• Unreal Engine Coding (Udemy) 07/2021

Technical Skills:

• Programming languages: C#, C++, HTML, Java
• Engines and 3D software: Unreal Engine, Unity
• Cloud: Microsoft Azure
• Operating Systems: Ubuntu, Windows, MacOS
• Project Management: JIRA, GitLab

Soft Skills:

• Collaboration, Problem-Solving, Analytical Thinking
• Cultural Awareness, Adaptability, Leadership

Despite these credentials, I have been receiving rejections from the roles I apply to. I am particularly interested in understanding:

1. Are there any gaps in my experience or skills that I need to address?
2. How can I improve my resume or cover letter to better highlight my strengths?
3. Are there specific certifications or courses that would make me a more attractive candidate?
4. Any general advice for someone in my position trying to break into the QA industry?

Madfinger Devs:
First off, thank you. This game is scratching an itch for me and some of my prior service buddies that I wasn't sure was ever going to be scratched unless we made it ourselves. So, thank you. I've got about 50 hours of playtime in so far and there are some kinks to work out, but there are overall a ton of great things about this game and we are thoroughly enjoying it thus far. So, the following is a wishlist of sorts that the group of guys I play with have come up with. We are fully aware that this is in Early Access and I expect bugs, imbalance, and issues. This is not a complaint, it's meant to be a mostly constructive criticism, with some wish list sprinkled in that we think would really send this game to the next level for those who are similarly-minded.
Item Interaction
Interacting with items is much harder than it should be. Opening and closing doors, picking things up, it feels like I have to hover around looking for some magical point on the item in order to interact with it. Maybe this is an adjustment in the radius of the pointer, or the interactable sphere of the model itself but this should be just a *little* more forgiving, so that opening and closing doors/windows and picking up items can happen just a little bit faster.
Nameplates
For the love of god. Please add some way to ID friendlies, even if just my own squad besides the map. A name plate, maybe a green dot on the compass, something. I'm all for immersiveness, but it's hard to maintain formation when i can't see who my teammates are half of the time. Even if it's a name plate that only appears when i aim directly at them, something.
Healing
We love that there is more of an emphasis on how one heals than simply using a medkit. However, it seems like this process is a little more arduous than necessary. For instance, the healing of teammates is unfortunately abysmal at the moment. The "Examine" system is fine, but then if I move my mouse even a few pixels, I have to re-examine the teammate before I can "heal" them. Then, I have to have the items out and on my chest rig or in my pockets to use items on a teammate or faction member. This seems a little odd. So, Suggestions for healing:

1. **Edit** It seems like the medical items are in fact accessible, according to other commenters. I'll continue playing and testing this myself, it just felt like it wasn't working consistently for me. However, sounds like user error here!
2. **Edit** to clarify improvements for rendering aid to other players: As of now, if I switch into my inventory or move my cursor for any reason, I have to re-examine the casualty in order to administer aid. This wastes precious time when a teammate is bleeding out. I suggest that Once a player examines a casualty, they should not have to examine them again unless they either sustain more injuries, or some appropriate amount of time has passed. Once I know they have a broken arm and GSW to the neck, I don't forget that if I look in my inventory. Please fix this.
3. When I was in the military, we always harped on using the casualty's own IFAK to render aid first, before dipping into our own. We carry our IFAK so that we are essentially providing the supplies needed for our own first level of care. It would make a lot of sense to when examining the casualty, it also checks to see if any of the necessary medical supplies to treat the casualty's wounds are actually in their own inventory (can be restricted to medical bags affixed to their belt/chest rig) and use those first, before using our own supplies. I cannot tell you how frustrating it is to stop and try to help a random faction mate bleeding in the street only for them to die, and I've wasted my precious bandages and blood packs on them. in PvP, you could maybe loot their body, but in PvE it's a total loss. You can't recover your items and the player is just gone. Applying their own aid first would alleviate a lot of this waste and also give it a little more realistic edge.
4. We should be able to drag unconscious/coma teammates. If a teammate goes down, we should be able to drag their body back into cover. Maybe limit this to squadmates only, so that there's less of a chance of griefing/trolling but it should be possible to drag a comrade to safety to administer aid, rather than having to kneel in the middle of the road to do so.

A More Dynamic LZ system
What we have currently works on a basic level. It's essentially a bunch of roller coasters that give the player a bird's eye view of the map as they traverse from one point to another. However, this system could use some improvements.

1. Ability to extend the time a bird is on an LZ. Sometimes things happen, and for the bird to touch down for 10s and take off because you're bandaging after an unexpected contact can be rough. That wait can be 10-15 minutes and in some cases longer. Either A) make the wait time 30s and once all squad members "ready up" the bird can lift off immediately, OR B) the wait time stays +/-10s and squad members on the LZ can "Press Y" to request the bird stays on deck for another 10 seconds.
2. 4 birds per faction can be extremely frustrating, especially when there are lots of solos and duos. We have to find a way to make more birds available or to better use the 4 that are available:
   1. Simply make more birds available. 1xhelicopter per squad on server.
   2. Make it so that players can "ride back" on birds that are dropping off players. (Yes, this could extend in-flight time for birds in the air, but it could also reduce number of requests). If a bird drops a team off at Charlie 1, and I am there, the bird can show on map Destination: C1 > RTB, and I would know that bird is returning to base after dropping off at Charlie 1. If I hop onto that bird, it flies back to base, if I do not, it can fly off-map to the nearest edge. I think this could easily be implemented and would cut down on a lot of helo requests to LZ's.
   3. Implement a fuel system on the birds. For instance, I'm at Foxtrot 2 and want to go to India 1. If I request to India 1, and there's a bird already en route to an F-2 or a nearby LZ, and it has fuel capacity to get to India 1, it can drop off its team, pick me up and take me to India 1. Once fuel capacity is reached, it flies off-map at nearest edge
   4. Any one of these or hybrid method could reduce the amount of wait times for teams to get birds, and also be more efficient for getting teams to and from locations using the same birds already in play, especially if Patrol Bases or faction Main Bases could be opted as helo refueling options?
3. Maybe able to purchase an emergency Pickup? It can be expensive ($10K+), but being able to call in a bird to any open, flat area for an emergency pickup would be cool. It would also give us a reason to use the currently pointless smoke grenades.
   1. Emergency Pickup only useable in area that has 30m+ radius of open ground with no trees.
   2. Call in Bird, at 30 seconds out, you have to pop a colored smoke, the bird will confirm color and land on your smoke.

Death Penalty/Loot - Okay, so it is nice that when a player dies, they have an opportunity to return to their corpse and get their loot back. This is a nice touch and has saved me a bit of money and gear over the past couple weeks. However, even in PvE there should be a way for some to loot a dead body. I am thinking of maybe 2 ways to do this:

1. Now, I say maybe keep the first-death grace period to go back and get your loot, assuming you can make it. However, if you die a second time, that corpse should become lootable. Perhaps, a time limit can be imposed so that there aren't just dead bodies cluttering up the game and wasting resources, but maybe for 2-3 minutes, the corpse becomes lootable to all (or maybe just faction or even squad). This allows for teammates to help pick up the gear one may lose, if they die during PvE, and also provides some scavenging opportunities for others.
2. After the first PvE death, maybe there is a 15-minute timer to return to the body, where it is not lootable. This gives the player (in most cases) enough time to return to the body if they move quickly, and can protect their gear from opportunists. After 15 minutes, the body becomes lootable for another 5 minutes, for a total of 20 minutes of recovery time, the last 5 of which can be looted by other players. After 20, the body disappears for all. this helps to save resources and adds some scavenging, but also allows for teammates to help pick up the slack. If the player dies a second time before the 15 minutes expires, the 5 minute lootable period begins immediately.

Suppressors, Camouflage, Concealment
Suppressors and camouflage should work on AI. I don't know what system is in place to "alert" AI, but it seems like I get one suppressed shot, then anyone within 50-100m locks on to my precise location, regardless of concealment or camouflage and I come under immediate effective fire, even if I one-shot an unaware AI with a suppressed weapon. As of now, the only reason to spend the money on a suppressor in this game is if I just want my own shots to be quieter for myself and my squad. There's no tactical advantage for the money spent in PvE and the effect is limited in PvP.

1. Maybe a system that rewards players for taking controlled shots? A suppressed one-shot kill from >100m should only alert AI within immediate proximity. They can alert to the general direction of the player's shot (maybe 90-degree sector) and begin scanning.
2. Suppressed weapons fired within 50-75m of enemy AI should still alert them, but maybe to a lesser extent than they currently do. Maybe a 60-degree cone of "alerted" status for enemies in this 50-100m range when firing suppressed.
3. <50m suppressed weapons have no effect.
4. AI should not be able to see me at 50m+ through dense vegetation. I cannot see them, they should not be able to see me. Sure, if they want to spray an AK into a tree line as suppressing fire, fine. However, they should not be taking point-target shots on me because a 4-pixel by 4-pixel patch of my glove was detected.

AI- We have to talk about this
I don't know why, but it feels like I am constantly on a pendulum swinging between the extremes of AI who couldn't shoot me if their muzzle was pressed into my chest, and AI who are able to nail me in the T-Box through 12-inch thick reinforced concrete.

1. I don't know the magic middle ground, but having the AI be slightly disoriented when fired upon, maybe taking 1-2 seconds to react and get their bearings would help add a more realistic edge to the gun fights.
2. AI should behave somewhat tactically. I would love to see some bounding movements, suppressive fire, and flanking. I don't know how to implement, but maybe if there are more 4+ AI in a 20m radius, they get grouped up and become a fireteam. Two of them set a base of fire from some covered position while another two make a flanking maneuver
3. Clipping is an issue. I've died several times to AI shooting me through the floors and walls in the YBL-1 bunker. Thankfully the gear isn't prohibitively expensive, but it is an annoyance.

Flesh out this world
The island is huge. It's huge and the whole thing can be traversed on foot. It's just that there's really no reason to do so. I'd much rather just ride my helicopter to the LZ closest to my objective, in and out. Get my reward. There's no incentive to walk between points of interest unless we are trying to PvP and want to go largely undetected across the map to our ambush site. Here are some ways to accomplish a more immersive island.

1. There are no civilians. I know this can be explained away by an evacuation, but that's no fun. There could be civilians in these villages and it could be very engaging. Why am I running boxes of medical supplies out to villages where the only inhabitants are enemy combatants? Add non-combatant civilians.
   1. Make villages have non-combatants. If you kill them, it can cost you a fine and hurt your faction's standing within that village among the civilians.
   2. Civilians, if faction standing becomes too negative with them, will become hostile toward your faction. (kill too many, they arm themselves and fight back). Each faction has its own unique standing with the civilians in that village on the server, so each village can have its own diplomatic stance.
   3. Civilians can function as in-game vendors. Some dude in a market stall may sell fish, or crafting items for features I read were anticipated in later iterations of the game.
   4. If a faction's standing becomes strong enough, civilians may even arm themselves and help to drive out the hostiles occupying the village. Maybe this part is something that becomes a part of a dynamic event later.
   5. Even if they do nothing, it adds a layer of complexity to the missions, and makes it so that players must get Positive ID before taking a shot. In some cases, hostiles can pose as civilians, and pick up a weapon adding an even more immersive element to asymmetric warfare.
2. Patrol Bases - This can be done in a way that gives players a way to seek refuge and operate out of forward bases. Something like Elder Scrolls Online did the castle/keep system in their PvP where the NPC's in some neutral zones captured by one faction or another would then guard that area on behalf of the faction.
   1. Points of Interest can be captured as patrol bases. This gives another "objective" to players and can encourage more PvP interactions.
   2. Once captured, a patrol base (PB) gets assigned a number of NPC's that will fight hostile NPC's and other factions that come within a pre-determined distance of the PB.
   3. Helicopters can fly in and out of patrol bases owned by that faction. Gives an additional LZ that is less prone to LZ camping.
3. AI Patrols - Each faction should have some AI patrolling its immediately controlled areas.
   1. Dense presence in the town/area between the main base and starter town for each faction. These can be 4-6 man patrols, moving tactically and in conventional military formations. They can be engaged by players and hostile AI.
   2. Less dense patrols in forward areas. Mostly on roads between points of interest.
      1. Patrol between Crimson Shield base camp and Kiu Vongsa, between KV Gas Station and the ridge west of Hunter's paradise, along the main road, for example. Just 4-6 man patrols that walk the roads and can be engaged.
      2. Similar routes in other faction areas.

Miscellaneous Gear and Feature Wish List

1. Belt-fed weapons. Please.
   1. This could be game changing for PvE and PvP. They should be expensive. They should be heavy, and they should be more of a cone of fire. They can be powerful, suppressive weapons, balanced by the fact that they aren't meant for accurate point-target system.
   2. This gives squads an opportunity to use more immersive tactics. Setting up bases of fire, support and assault elements, etc..
   3. Should probably limit this to SAW/RPK and other lighter weapon systems
2. Laser Range Finders and Binoculars
   1. Binoculars for scouting out enemy positions.
   2. Laser Range finders for getting good distance measurements for zeroing weapons
   3. These should have weight, cost money and take up inventory space. Choosing to carry this means leaving something else behind.
3. Radios - These are a necessity.
   1. Make Radios available for purchase from one of the vendors.
   2. They have multi-channel capabilities. Faction, which is also audible in the command tent at main base. Squad, which can be heard by anyone in your squad with a radio equipped and on the squad frequency.
   3. Maybe make VOIP always on for PVP. If you're communicating, you should be audible. Can reduce range of hearing, but I think this would add a very interesting dynamic to communicating as a team and being weary of possible enemies listening to you.
4. Mortars. They're already there. Let us use them.
   1. the mortars on our main base can be put into effect and used by the players
   2. Have the radios above allow for calling fire missions. Call up main faction on radio, request fire mission from anyone on base who is listening and willing to use the mortars.
   3. Provide the "mortar team" a position for enemy fire. It can be your position and distance/direction or just a grid location to the enemy. This is where binoculars and Laser Range finders become handy.
   4. Can limit the rounds fired from base to X rounds per minute, to avoid spamming.
   5. Can also limit range. As of now, 81mm mortars can basically engage targets to Ground Zero from each base and the contested points of interest between each main base i.e YBL, Midnight Sapphire and Ban Pa.
   6. Could allow for maybe 60mm mortars with shorter range and less firepower inside of the patrol bases mentioned above, and give fire mission support to squads operating further out or omit that feature and keep
5. Make smoke grenades do something -right now, they don't have any real reason in the game other than beautifying the main base while waiting for a helicopter.
   1. Allow them to signal incoming birds at an LZ.
   2. Allow grey/white smoke but more dense for providing concealment while moving/retreating in a firefight
   3. Allow them to signal a resupply drop that could potentially be called in later in the game at a forward location. I.e. call for resupply, 15 seconds out, mark Drop zone with colored smoke and the drop occurs within 150m of that smoke.
6. Mines - I'm hit or miss on this, but I've heard others ask for it
   1. Claymores, PWN, IED, whatever. Some form of anti-personnel mine that can be used to protect avenues of approach, kick off ambushes, or defend sniper hides and machine gun nests (assuming you implement the LMG suggestion above)
7. Speaking of Command and Signal - Star Clusters and parachutes, please add these.
   1. These could be a great way to signal squad location, objectives, or signal ambush start.
8. Shared Mission Board.
   1. There should be a way for us to draw on a map, on the objective and have our team see it. Maybe everyone has a tablet that can pull up a mission brief, similar to a Ready or Not or maybe Rainbow Six style satellite imagery. We can draw on it, share it with the team and have us know various rally points, lines of departure, etc within the squad.
9. Arm bands or helmet covers to help ID squad/Team/Clan
   1. We should have a way to ID our squad. Even if it's just an orange patch on the left sleeve, or something to that effect so that we can quickly see who our friendlies and immediate squad are while on mission or in the field. Since camouflage is customizable, I wouldn't suggest removing a customization feature, but add a way for us to be able to ID one another quickly and tactically.
   2. This can later be used to implement clan regalia, etc..
10. Ghillie suits.
11. Expensive, heavy, hot, but make them available.
12. Maybe add a way to customize them with vegetation, especially once crafting items are released.

These are just a handful of the items we've come up with to add some more immersiveness and depth to the game. Overall, I'm very happy with what's come out so far in Early Access. I hope they continue in the direction they've been going so far.
**EDIT** Thanks to all for the suggestions, comments and feedback to this list. I've updated the medical items to account for the fact that accessing them from outside med bags sounds like my error. Again, this is not a complaint. This is simply a "wish list" a few of us have dreamt up that we think would just add a chef's kiss to the game.
Super happy with current Early Access showing, and this is what EA is all about. Player feedback and interaction during development, so that the final product has a greater chance at success!