I'm a 26 year old autistic man and transgender (it is relevant to the story) from England and basically I moved from Cornwall to Preston to live with my girlfriend. Basically I used to be a very introvert person but since moving here 3 years ago in the past year I've wanted to make some friends so I did just that and went to a pub one day and met an older guy (58 year old man) who I considered a good friend.
Well anyway I've known him about a year maybe and he was a nice bloke, we would share rounds of drinks and that. He told me had suffered 2 strokes and a heart attack, he also lost his dad who he was close too about 4 years ago. I helped him as he helped me become more sociable. I had him on Facebook and WhatsApp as a contact who I'd message.
After about 3 months of knowing him he told me he fancied an 18 year old, he was telling me lets go and meet him all the time at his work place which i thought was really weird but I didnt believe him that he actually liked an 18 year old. But it was just weird in my opinion It turned very weirder when he got rejected by him. He would go on about hating black men but he'd "joke" that he would shag a black man because the size of their penis to which I thought he's drank too much il just ignore him and go home for the night. He then got creepy towards me saying because I'm trans he would like to have a 3some along with another trans person and when I turned it down he said he hated trans people and that were perverts to children. I then stopped hanging out with him for a while due to his racism and transphobia. My girlfriend was aware of this and agreed that I shouldn't hang out with him.
In August last year I went out and met him randomly whilst we was in the same pub and he apologised and said he didn't mean any of it and that he was drunk and being really stupid. I was sat with another friend of mine and he said just talk to him basically. He was fine and I forgave him. That same night I was sat in a pub and I had left my phone with my friend whilst I went for the toilet. To which I came back and it was gone. I looked everywhere and even broke down crying I asked him if he had seen it and he said no. I was crying and went home but realised I had a tracking app on my tablet at home to locate it. Well sure enough it came up to his house when I googled the street! So I demanded my phone back and he said yeh he had it and that it was a joke and that he was going to give it back anyway. I decided that was absolutely it and I'd never meet him again.
I was getting on with my life I was getting help for all my problems I was facing with autism and had him blocked for ages. My friend messages me one day out the blue saying basically he is threatening suicide because I had him blocked and that he had been sectioned because of me. I unblocked him and sent him a message saying "I want you to leave me and my friends alone for good I don't want anything to do with you" he told me he wanted to meet me and talk to me face to face and I did... I probably shouldn't of done. Anyway I made friends with him stupidly but didn't hang out with him as much.. my girlfriend always said he picked on me cos I'm considered a very vulnerable adult.
To the point I'm getting too this was just context. I've not met him for a drink since January I told him I didn't want to go out as I was focusing on university and to be true I lied to him a lot because I didn't wanna meet him. Ever since I said that to him he's been driving his car past my house and taking pictures of it and sending it to me on WhatsApp. Now he's faking heart attacks and that if I don't talk to him he will kill himself, he's not leaving me alone (I have blocked him) but he's been texting me on unknown numbers so I can't block those threatening if I don't talk to him he will tell everyone I know that I'm transgender, that I'm autistic and desperate for a job to the place I applied for for a job. He has stalked me to find out where I live basically and
I love Beth Evans she was my best girlfriend

I've come across two reports so far.[1][2] This question is part of my mission to determine the true danger level of combining 5-MeO-DMT with MAOIs (its SRI action is comparable to meth's[3]).
[1] All true, dopamine and norepinephrine is less of a concern. You’ll read reports and I can personally verify the accuracy of (20mg of vaporized methamphetamine a reasonablely selective dopamine releasing agent with mild effects on norepinephrine) on 30mg nardil not leading to serotonin toxicology.
u/PowerHungryGhandi, https://www.reddit.com/harmalas/s/KvviLSU0pC
[2] I just recently, after 25 plus instances of combining Nardil with varying amounts of meth, come, crack and Ritalin, I’ve concluded that I perceive the effects of the RIs (cocaine, MPD) are blunted significantly while Releasers (amp, meth) are greatlyyyy and unstabily potentiated. I actually was just diagnosed with drug induced congestive heart failure at 27 after having a massive heart attack from combining a grain of rice sized piece of meth with Nardil while mildly drunk and in minor lyrica withdrawal. Moral of the story: it can turn on you and out of nowhere. It’s not worth the permanent damage. If anyone is interested in details I can provide them as well as link screenshots of the actually hospital paperwork.
The absolute nuts thing is, as reckless as this is, I’ve since smoke lots of crack while still taking the MAOI without any adverse reactions. Cocaine generally would MUCH sooner cause me debilitating levels of physical anxiety first.
u/No-Tap9133, https://www.reddit.com/MAOIs/comments/1cc8nz9/comment/l17vq64
[3] Studies using rat brain synaptosomes [63] show that 5-MeO-DMT also inhibits 5-HT re-uptake with an IC50 value comparable to other psychostimulants such as cocaine and methamphetamine, whereas it has little effect on dopamine re-uptake or the release of monoamine neurotransmitters.
[63] Nagai F, Nonaka R, Kamimura K. Satoh Hisashi. The effects of non-medically used psychoactive drugs on monoamine neurotransmission in rat brain. Eur J Pharmacol. 2007;559:132–137. [PubMed] [Google Scholar] [See table 2 in ‘3. Results’]
Psychedelic 5-methoxy-N,N-dimethyltryptamine: metabolism, pharmacokinetics, drug interactions, and pharmacological actions. Shen HW, Jiang XL, Winter JC, Yu AM. Curr Drug Metab. 2010 Oct;11(8):659-66. doi: 10.2174/138920010794233495 (PHARMACO/TOXICOLOGICAL EFFECTS AND DRUG ACTIONS OF 5-MEO-DMT)

Does anyone have experience using tango shoes to dance salsa? I've been dancing salsa for a year now in regular street heels with suede glued to the bottom and it kills my feet every time, and I want to invest in some actual dance shoes. All the salsa shoes I try on fit weird and seem super low quality and don't look that good tbh. Would there be any downfalls of using a 7cm tango heel like this for salsa? They're real leather and are just so much prettier... https://madamepivot.shop/en/tango-shoes/3276-871045-giada-pelle-e-vernice-neutra.html#/43-heel_heigh-85/47-shape-standard/213-colors-beige/286-padding-comfort/293-back-closed/403-size-38/450-sole-leathe504-style-giada

So I went to Regis today.
I ended up needing a new seat cutter, so I made the drive across DFW to get it. Turned into a really good trip. They use to have a shelf in the front with returns, and discontinued tooling on it, that disappeared. So I asked what happened. Well the dude was like we are moving things around. He said but if you want to look at that stuff follow me. Lol SO I DID.... I ended up picking up at least 40 nitrided guide reamers, 1 other seat cutter, a new dial indicator "small one with all the bits", about 15 different stones for my valve grinder, and seat stones, about 15 pilots, a TON of valve spring shims, about 6 ball hones in different sizes, 6 3M plastic surface cleaners that go on the grinder, 1 complete set of valve guide hones, "that had 3 adjustable fixtures for", a hand full of grinder disks, some long reach christmas tree wire brushes, one weird looking carbide flycutter, "i bought cause i was curious about it, 5 carbide inserts for my 3 angle seat cutter, Just a bunch of stuff... all for less than 300 bucks. Not including the stuff i actually had to buy. lol Today was a good day. lol

Tom took another look at the dwindling encampment as his dismay began to fade away. "Whoever's left to hang out with are the most committed to the cause" he thought to himself. "If anything, I'll have more fun than I did before." And after all, they had a good lineup of activists scheduled to visit in the next few days, and an anarchist band had even agreed to play this afternoon. He had definitely noticed a rapid drop in the number of campers since the end of the semester, and had even begun to doubt that they would be able to get any sort of concessions out of the university. But his thinking had changed after hearing the speeches that morning.
First to speak was Tom's friend and comrade, Eric. His impassioned indictment of the Israeli government reminded Tom of the importance of their activism. Then came the married grad students, the Trotskyist Abdou and the pan-Arabist Farida. They were international students studying English and anthropology, respectively. Or was it anthropology and sociology? Abdou lectured on the university's connection to the military-industrial complex. His speech was filled with threats to the administration that Tom was sure the limp-dicked Trot had no means of fulfilling. Even so, he had to admit that despite all his other inadequacies, Abdou was a powerful speaker. Finally came Farida. Tom had always considered her the best speaker of them all, but frankly he had a hard time taking his eyes off her whether she was speaking or not. He had tried flirting with her before, and he got the feeling that Abdou was even more into it than she was. Thinking about it now, he couldn't quite remember what her speech had been about, but it had certainly improved his spirits.
As the "Bacon Brigade" began setting up their instruments, Tom decided to make a point of dancing with Farida that afternoon. As the average tent now held two campers rather than five, he even thought he might get a chance to enjoy some of the newfound privacy.
...
When there was a break in the music, Tom sauntered over to the table where Abdou was sitting. As an ML, Tom could hardly stand Trotskyists, but he put on a smile for the sake of "left unity."
"She's a good dancer isn't she?" said Abdou.
"Oh yes, the best," agreed Tom. He was trying to think of a way of progressing his slow seduction of this Muslim woman and decided to be bold. "Look Abdou, the band will be winding down soon, why don't you both come back to my tent and I'll show you some comradely hospitality. I also have some suggestions that I know you'll love."
Abdou's mind was racing with the possibilities of the situation. Would this be the chance to see his wife seduced and taken by this big stud? Supposing Farida won't agree? Before he could engage his brain Abdou found himself agreeing to Tom's offer. "Wonderful, wonderful," beamed Tom and he could feel his big cock twitch at the thought of bedding Abdou's beautiful wife.
Just then Farida reappeared. "What are you two talking about?" she said.
Before Abdou could say a word, Tom said "Well my dear, your husband has kindly accepted my invitation of hospitality at my tent."
Farida didn't know what to say. She had thought Abdou would whisk her off back to the hotel and give her the fucking she desperately needed. Rubbing up against Tom's manhood had taken its toll. "Well I suppose we could come and see where you camp," she said, "but we mustn't stay too late must we Abdou?"
"What? I err no, I suppose not," stammered Abdou as Tom rose and offered Farida his arm.
And the three of them found themselves heading off to tent where the lives of Abdou and Farida would be changed forever. As they walked along Abdou held one of Farida's arms and Tom the other. However, after a while Abdou consciously let go of his wife's arm and stepped behind Tom.
This was not lost on the big white and he put his big protective arm around Abdou's wife as if to say to everyone "she's mine." If Farida hadn't been so dazed by the afternoon's events, she might have noticed various other white students smiling at Tom with knowing grins. They had recognized the situation immediately; a Muslim couple with cuckold husband following on as a big powerful white man led the wife to his cot.
Soon they reached Tom's tent and both Abdou and Farida were pleasantly surprised at how spacious it was. "Let me get you some coffee," said Tom as both Abdou and Farida collapsed onto a big sleeping bag.
Having sorted the drinks, Tom put some music on, and crawling over to Farida he said, "Can we have another dance Farida, you're such a good dancer?"
Before Farida could answer she felt her husband pushing her up. "Go on Farida, you know how much you enjoy it."
Abdou secretly wanted to see his wife in the arms of this Adonis again and who knows maybe more. Having no real reason to object, Farida agreed and as she accepted Toms hand she couldn't help but feel a shiver at the thought of being reacquainted with his penis, albeit covered by his trousers. However, as they left the tent she had a suspicion that he wasn't wearing any under garments since his penis had seemed so clearly outlined earlier.
As he clasped her to himself Tom could feel his big cock twitch once again. He moved one hand down to the small of her back, just to test the waters and meeting no resistance after another minute or so he moved his hand onto her sexy bottom. He could feel through the thin dress that Farida wasn't wearing thick pants, or perhaps only very skimpy ones and he couldn't wait to see her naked.
Farida felt lost in a different world as she circled round with this big man. Not only could she feel his penis growing hard against her once more, but she felt his big hand on her bottom pulling her onto his hardness. When she looked at her husband (still sitting in the tent), she noticed that he was just rubbing his own penis through his trousers. "My goodness," she thought, "he's getting turned on watching us. Supposing I flirt a bit more and show him what he's missing?"
With that Farida deliberately started to open her legs and let Tom's muscular leg rub against her inflamed sex.
This change in Farida's demeanor was not lost on Tom. As he led her back to the tent, he let his hands roam all over the back of this sexy hijabi Muslim wife and he leaned down to kiss and nibble her neck and ears. He heard Farida sigh and knew that he was close to capturing this sexy wife. "Fatima, let's give Abdou a show to remember shall we?"
Farida was brought back from her dreamlike state by Tom's question. "What do you mean?" she asked.
Almost in a whisper Tom said, "You know, a bit of thesis-antithesis-synthesis."
He had already found the zipper that ran down the back of Farida's dress and he had it in his hands as he spoke to her. He slowly started to pull the zipper down and it was half way down her back before Farida realised what was happening. "Wait Tom, we can't do this, I'm married."
"So what of it, Abdou wants me to undress you, don't you Abdou?"
Abdou had no hesitation in replying in the affirmative. This is what he had wanted for so long.
Caught in the confusion and surprise of hearing her husband say that he wanted to see another man, undress her, Farida just lay there while Tom pulled the zipper right down and then eased the dress off her shoulders. Suddenly she realised that she was lying in only her stockings, garter belt, and thong panties.
As she looked up at Tom she saw something that she hadn't seen in a man for years and that was undisguised lust. This man was lusting after her, this married women! She should have felt ashamed at her feelings but she didn't. Having got half-naked, she realised that she was enjoying the attention of this muscular white man. In fact she decided to crawl around in front of him as if to say 'look at what my husband has and you haven't'.
This might have been a foolish act, but it merely served to confirm what both men knew. For Tom it confirmed that Farida was absolutely gorgeous, the sexiest Muslim woman he had ever seen and that she needed to be loved sexually. For Abdou as he fingered his painfully erect cock, he knew that he was just a few steps away from pushing his wife into a sleeping bag with another man. He was close to realizing his fantasy.
Tom pulled Farida to him, lifted her face to his and he kissed her. Farida would always remember that first kiss since it was both passionate but more significantly the precursor to her crossing a line that could not be re- crossed, and to setting in motion events that would last her and her husband a lifetime. She accepted his big tongue into her mouth and her tongue fenced with his. She could feel his big hands roaming all over body now.
In her trance-like state it seemed quite natural that Tom should start to remove his clothing. Both Farida and Abdou watched as the big man removed his shirt to reveal a hugely-muscled chest and then he dropped his trousers and just as Farida had suspected he wore no underwear. His big cock reared up in all is magnificence and Tom was gratified to hear both husband and wife express surprise at his size.
Tom crawled over to the sleeping bag where Farida was sitting and crouched in front of her, his big cock semi erect. He remembered that Eric had told him that the cops were closing in, and he knew he would have to move quickly if he wanted to finish before they cleared the encampment. Farida's head was at the same level as the big man's groin and she was amazed at the whole size and muscularity of this man. Her trance-like state was broken by Tom who said softly "Take my cock into your mouth."
Farida was aghast, "I can't! It's dirty and I've never done that before."
Tom laughed to himself. This wife was indeed naive and yet he was gratified that he would be the first man to have his cock sucked by her. Lifting her face so that she could look into his eyes, Tom said, "As we hear from German ideologists, Germany has in the last few years gone through an unparalleled revolution. The decomposition of the Hegelian philosophy, which began with Strauss, has developed into a universal ferment into which all the “powers of the past” are swept. In the general chaos mighty empires have arisen only to meet with immediate doom, heroes have emerged momentarily only to be hurled back into obscurity by bolder and stronger rivals. It was a revolution beside which the French Revolution was child’s play, a world struggle beside which the struggles of the Diadochi [successors of Alexander the Great] appear insignificant. Principles ousted one another, heroes of the mind overthrew each other with unheard-of rapidity, and in the three years 1842-45 more of the past was swept away in Germany than at other times in three centuries.
"All this is supposed to have taken place in the realm of pure thought.
"Certainly it is an interesting event we are dealing with: the putrescence of the absolute spirit. When the last spark of its life had failed, the various components of this caput mortuum began to decompose, entered into new combinations and formed new substances. The industrialists of philosophy, who till then had lived on the exploitation of the absolute spirit, now seized upon the new combinations. Each with all possible zeal set about retailing his apportioned share. This naturally gave rise to competition, which, to start with, was carried on in moderately staid bourgeois fashion. Later when the German market was glutted, and the commodity in spite of all efforts found no response in the world market, the business was spoiled in the usual German manner by fabricated and fictitious production, deterioration in quality, adulteration of the raw materials, falsification of labels, fictitious purchases, bill-jobbing and a credit system devoid of any real basis. The competition turned into a bitter struggle, which is now being extolled and interpreted to us as a revolution of world significance, the begetter of the most prodigious results and achievements.
"If we wish to rate at its true value this philosophic charlatanry, which awakens even in the breast of the honest German citizen a glow of national pride, if we wish to bring out clearly the pettiness, the parochial narrowness of this whole Young-Hegelian movement and in particular the tragicomic contrast between the illusions of these heroes about their achievements and the actual achievements themselves, we must look at the whole spectacle from a standpoint beyond the frontiers of Germany.
"Ideology in General, German Ideology in Particular: German criticism has, right up to its latest efforts, never quitted the realm of philosophy. Far from examining its general philosophic premises, the whole body of its inquiries has actually sprung from the soil of a definite philosophical system, that of Hegel. Not only in their answers but in their very questions there was a mystification. This dependence on Hegel is the reason why not one of these modern critics has even attempted a comprehensive criticism of the Hegelian system, however much each professes to have advanced beyond Hegel. Their polemics against Hegel and against one another are confined to this – each extracts one side of the Hegelian system and turns this against the whole system as well as against the sides extracted by the others. To begin with they extracted pure unfalsified Hegelian categories such as “substance” and “self-consciousness,” later they desecrated these categories with more secular names such as species “the Unique,” “Man,” etc.
"The entire body of German philosophical criticism from Strauss to Stirner is confined to criticism of religious conceptions. [The following passage is crossed out in the manuscript:] claiming to be the absolute redeemer of the world from all evil. Religion was continually regarded and treated as the arch-enemy, as the ultimate cause of all relations repugnant to these philosophers. The critics started from real religion and actual theology. What religious consciousness and a religious conception really meant was determined variously as they went along. Their advance consisted in subsuming the allegedly dominant metaphysical, political, juridical, moral and other conceptions under the class of religious or theological conceptions; and similarly in pronouncing political, juridical, moral consciousness as religious or theological, and the political, juridical, moral man – “man” in the last resort – as religious. The dominance of religion was taken for granted. Gradually every dominant relationship was pronounced a religious relationship and transformed into a cult, a cult of law, a cult of the State, etc. On all sides it was only a question of dogmas and belief in dogmas. The world was sanctified to an ever-increasing extent till at last our venerable Saint Max was able to canonise it en bloc and thus dispose of it once for all.
"The Old Hegelians had comprehended everything as soon as it was reduced to an Hegelian logical category. The Young Hegelians criticised everything by attributing to it religious conceptions or by pronouncing it a theological matter. The Young Hegelians are in agreement with the Old Hegelians in their belief in the rule of religion, of concepts, of a universal principle in the existing world. Only, the one party attacks this dominion as usurpation, while the other extols it as legitimate.
"Since the Young Hegelians consider conceptions, thoughts, ideas, in fact all the products of consciousness, to which they attribute an independent existence, as the real chains of men (just as the Old Hegelians declared them the true bonds of human society) it is evident that the Young Hegelians have to fight only against these illusions of consciousness. Since, according to their fantasy, the relationships of men, all their doings, their chains and their limitations are products of their consciousness, the Young Hegelians logically put to men the moral postulate of exchanging their present consciousness for human, critical or egoistic consciousness, and thus of removing their limitations. This demand to change consciousness amounts to a demand to interpret reality in another way, i.e. to recognise it by means of another interpretation. The Young-Hegelian ideologists, in spite of their allegedly “world-shattering" statements, are the staunchest conservatives. The most recent of them have found the correct expression for their activity when they declare they are only fighting against “phrases.” They forget, however, that to these phrases they themselves are only opposing other phrases, and that they are in no way combating the real existing world when they are merely combating the phrases of this world. The only results which this philosophic criticism could achieve were a few (and at that thoroughly one-sided) elucidations of Christianity from the point of view of religious history; all the rest of their assertions are only further embellishments of their claim to have furnished, in these unimportant elucidations, discoveries of universal importance.
"It has not occurred to any one of these philosophers to inquire into the connection of German philosophy with German reality, the relation of their criticism to their own material surroundings.
"First Premises of Materialist Method: The premises from which we begin are not arbitrary ones, not dogmas, but real premises from which abstraction can only be made in the imagination. They are the real individuals, their activity and the material conditions under which they live, both those which they find already existing and those produced by their activity. These premises can thus be verified in a purely empirical way.
"The first premise of all human history is, of course, the existence of living human individuals. Thus the first fact to be established is the physical organisation of these individuals and their consequent relation to the rest of nature. Of course, we cannot here go either into the actual physical nature of man, or into the natural conditions in which man finds himself – geological, hydrographical, climatic and so on. The writing of history must always set out from these natural bases and their modification in the course of history through the action of men.
"Men can be distinguished from animals by consciousness, by religion or anything else you like. They themselves begin to distinguish themselves from animals as soon as they begin to produce their means of subsistence, a step which is conditioned by their physical organisation. By producing their means of subsistence men are indirectly producing their actual material life.
"The way in which men produce their means of subsistence depends first of all on the nature of the actual means of subsistence they find in existence and have to reproduce. This mode of production must not be considered simply as being the production of the physical existence of the individuals. Rather it is a definite form of activity of these individuals, a definite form of expressing their life, a definite mode of life on their part. As individuals express their life, so they are. What they are, therefore, coincides with their production, both with what they produce and with how they produce. The nature of individuals thus depends on the material conditions determining their production.
"This production only makes its appearance with the increase of population. In its turn this presupposes the intercourse [Verkehr] of individuals with one another. The form of this intercourse is again determined by production.
[continues in comment]

My son has been at this center for almost 1 year. There's two classes and each have 2-4yr olds. It's called montessori however they are not accredited as such, not really a big deal. My issues: Walked in on caregivers screaming at 2-3yr olds Whenever I pick him up and ask how his day was no one seems to know! They all day "they were in the other room" or just generically say okay. I never know what he actually does there. The director never seems to have it together, I often see her being critical of staff. Class sizes are huge and they don't always appear to be in ratio
Other than that he does well there, has leaned a lot and has seemed to make friends. I recently told them we were leaving and got all the guilt of "we are gonna miss him so much!"
Are these things not that bad? New center has amazing reviews from parents that I've talked to and smaller class size. Downfall is it's further away. I feel torn from taring him away from friends for mediocre reasons.

First of all I think trading Marner for a package that revolves around a G makes 0 sense. With Ullmark, Markstrom both available this offseason the goalie market is more saturated than usual. You shouldn't have to trade a 100 point Selke calibre winger for a G.
Saros is a 29 year old 5'10 G coming off a .906 season. He will be a UFA in 2025 (next summer), and likely looking for $8M+ if he has a bounce back season. Nashville had the 11th best xGA this season which makes them an above average defensive team. Make no mistake, he's elite, but you're paying for what he's done.
Askarov is a 21 year old 6'4 G former 11th OA pick. He had a .911 in the AHL which is elite for his age and a .943 in 2 NHL games. He has elite size, positioning, and athleticism. His numbers in Russia are on par with the likes of Shestyorkin, Vasilevski, and Sorokin. He's a legitimate stud and the only reason Nashville is fine with trading Saros.
There's a real possibility Nashville doesn't even re-sign Saros next summer so they don't block Askarov, who is legitimately one of the best goalies not in the league. An Askarov/Woll tandem does a couple things. Both are RFA's next season so they'll be cost controlled for the foreseeable future. It also gives the ability to the Leafs to pivot to either Askarov or Woll depending who becomes better, and also allows the team to actually address their D and depth forwards with the near 10M+ in cap you open up. Then you're able to trade they other who is still in their early 20s for a strong return. With Saros, you're forced to re-sign him to a UFA contract into his late 30s, and you've essentially blocked Woll from becoming the starting G even if he outperforms Saros in the future. Otherwise you're selling Saros for pennies on the dollar because he'll have a big contract into his late 30s.

So, after i fond out that in my country the nearly cheapest turbo can Cost actually more than a funcioning 2.6L engine, i Said f*ck it, i Will not be one Day slapping turbo on my car ( which can destroy only the engine ) i'm gonna engine swap it ( could destroy the whole car = financially worth it ). But That's where the problem starts...i have no idea what it depends on... All other things like size, how to Mount it and more are clear to me but, what About transmission And drive shaft ( engine in front And is fwd ) ? Do all engines just have the same "rod" sticking out of them to just shove it into the transmission ? Is this whole thing a bad idea ? Yes. Do I still wanna do it ? Of course.
I Will be happy for any response, i'm trying to understand how to work on cars and overall about sngine swapping, but I have a few years left before I can actually get to one.

I’m curious about how you all stay updated with what your teams are working on. As a foundeCEO, I often find it challenging to get a comprehensive view of everyone’s progress without sifting through countless emails and meeting notes. Also chasing them for updates is a weekly pain point for me as they are so busy actually doing their jobs to provide weekly status.
Do any of you face similar challenges? How do you manage to keep track of your team’s activities and ensure nothing falls through the cracks?
I’m particularly interested in:

• How do you get a weekly summary of your team’s work?
• What tools or processes do you use?
• Are there specific pain points you’ve encountered in staying updated?
• What is the size of your team?
• What industry or niche does your business operate in?

I'm working on a solution that aims to simplify this process, and I would love to hear about your experiences and any tools you’ve found helpful. Your insights could really help shape a tool that addresses these common pain points.
Looking forward to hearing your thoughts and learning from your experiences!
Thanks!

Credit to u/SpacePaladin15 for the NOP Universe.
Hey, I hope everyone's doing well!
Today we return to the namesake of this fic, an actual lesson about animals. This one focuses on Koalas! One of Australia's most recognisable critters. I hope you enjoy.
It's hardly worth mentioning, seeing as I'm an infrequent poster at the best of times, but I'll not have another chapter out for a few weeks due to limited free time and devoting most of my writing time to an upcoming ficnapping. Be sure to look out for that!
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Memory transcription subject: Rysel, Venlil Environmental Researcher
Date [Standardised human time]: 8th September 2136
“Koalas!”
Bernard’s energised voice boomed through the air as the classroom's monitor flickered into life, images of this paws lecture topic popping up one after the other until the entire screen was filled with a collage of furry quadrupeds.
Squee! I’ll never get tired of this, it’s all so cool!
As usual the sight of something new stirred immediate discussion, hushed murmurs swelling into vibrant discourse in little more than a heartbeat. Most of the class swiftly huddled together into small herds to bounce ideas around while the rest opted to stick to the solace of their own thoughts as they took in the display.
I’d be quite happy in either situation, though seeing as Sandi had already sunk into deep concentration and Kailo had peeled off to talk with Ennerif and Solenk, it seemed the decision had been made for me on this occasion. Wasting no more time on idle inspection of the people around me, I focused my full attention forward, eager to form first impressions before the lesson began in earnest.
Now then, time to make some educated guesses. What traits does this animal have? I wonder if I’ll get any right this paw?
Professional assumptions went paw-in-paw with the lectures, examining and coming up with hypotheses about the specimens was only natural. Recently however, I’d started to make a little game of it to make things even more interesting than usual. A veritable bonfire of ideas had been set ablaze within me, fueled by my newfound knowledge of Earthen wildlife. Every flash and spark of the flame was a fresh theory I could try to apply to the lectures. It was an invigorating exercise that further stoked my unceasing wonderment.
So far I’d only done this once during the previous class and, to my disappointment, I’d not done too well.
I was right when I guessed that chickens were omnivores, but wrong in my assumption that they could fly. And that red thing on their head, the um… what was it called? The comb! Yes, the comb. I thought that was to attract mates, but it regulates body heat instead. It’s fascinating. Oh! Stars damn it I’m rambling!
I bapped my tail against my leg, the soft thud being just enough to snap me back from my runaway thoughts before I went completely wall-eyed. I was becoming more and more accustomed to getting lost in my own head while remaining conscious of the fact; it was happening so frequently now that it was pretty much impossible not to. Now I was able to pull myself back to the world around me without having to rely on someone else shaking me out of it. Most of the time anyway.
Sandi still keeps an eye on me, and Kailo even decided to help out once without being too snide about it. Anyway where was I? Oh yeah, Koalas.
Glancing at the furred animals, two things immediately stood out. Firstly, their eyes were in a more central position on their face. And second, all the images showed them being on or close to trees. There were other noteworthy observations of course, such as the Koala’s prominent nose and rounded features, but they fell to the wayside as I honed in on these points first.
Hmmm… ok. I already know to discount the idea that they’re predators just from eye position, so let’s get that thought out of here. Maybe omnivorous? Herbivore? Agh no, I can’t just guess that for the sake of guessing, that’s the same problem! Hrm, it’s tough making these assumptions now that everything I thought I knew has been turned on its head.
Nevermind, I’ll focus on the other thing. All the trees make me think they’re arboreal, that seems to be a reasonable assumption. I wonder what else they-
Clearing his throat, Bernard broke my concentration, his call for attention silencing the murmuring conversation and redirecting everyone's focus to the lecturer's podium.
His gaze panned across the room as he waited for everyone to settle, a beaming smile lighting up his face, “As ever I’m delighted to see you all get so into the subject matter from the get go. I’m looking forward to hearing what you were discussing should you wish to share. For now though, how about we get started, hm?”
A chorus of merry bleats rang out from across the audience, ears and tails flicking happily in agreement. Bernard's grin grew in tandem with the class's fervour, clasping his hands together enthusiastically as he launched into the lesson, “Excellent! Then let’s get started.”
The pictures on screen dissolved away until only one remained, enlarging to cover the entire monitor with the fluffy grey face of a Koala peacefully reclining in the crook of a tree.
“Ah, there we are,” Bernard’s baritone timbre drifted through the room as he looked up at the image, his own tone reflecting the relaxed attitude of the animal on screen, “He looks so comfortable doesn’t he? Perfectly at peace with the world, not too surprising considering they sleep almost 20 hours a day. A full paw!”
A wave of beeps and gasps rippled through the herd, punctuated by a single yawn-dressed comment from Rova, “A full paw? Hwuuu… jealous.”
Her drowsy remark elicited several whistling giggles from the herd, Bernard's own jovial chortle joining them as he turned to face her, “Late evening Rova?”
I twisted a little in my seat, panning an eye in Rova’s direction just in time to see her bleary eyes bulge open and her ears shoot up, now intensely aware of the fact she hadn’t been as quiet as she thought she had.
Sitting up abruptly, she hastily tapped down errant tufts of wool that’d flared in surprise as she composed herself, though her nervousness at becoming the centre of the class's attention was still plain for all to hear, “Uh- I um… achem, a little bit yes, um- …sorry. Lokki dragged me out to a movie viewing in the rec centre. It went on pretty late.”
A melodramatic bray from the other side of the room drew everyone's ears away from Rova to the now aghast Lokki, paw splayed across his chest in faux indignation, “Dragged you? Well excuse me for trying to broaden your horizons with human movies. That’ll be the list time I- …Ahaaaa…”
Lokki’s theatrics were cut short by a heavy yawn of his own, a swell of whistling laughter rolling through the herd as vibrant bloom lit up his snout, a sight that elicited a particularly amused bleat from Rova.
Turning away from the duo I looked back at Bernard, pleased to see that he was chuckling along with us. Behaviour like Lokki’s would never have been tolerated in my school and university days but, in stark contrast, Bernard revelled in it, the liveliness of his students fueling his own bombastic style of teaching. It was a pleasant change of pace having a teacher who let us all be ourselves in class; provided we weren’t too disruptive to the lesson plan.
Speaking of which.
His laughter still rumbling through the air, Bernard clapped his hands to pull everyone's focus back to him, “Ok, ok, let’s get back to it then shall we? Rova. Lokki. Hopefully the two of you can stay awake long enough until you can grab yourselves a coffee.”
As the class settled down and the last few giggling beeps petered out, Benard pointed a hand to the screen, “So, the Koala. Let’s start simple shall we? They are herbivorous marsupials native to the eastern and southern coasts of Australia. Easily recognised the world over, they are a well known and beloved symbol of their homeland, along with other animals such as the Kangaroo and the Emu. The former of which you might remember from one of our earlier lectures.”
Indeed I did remember, along with how angry Bernard had gotten after some speh-head had derided the Yotul after he explained how he held specific disdain for such attitudes.
Uuuggghh… I never want to see him angry again. So chilling.
I shook my ears in an effort to dismiss the unpleasant memory, panning my eyes back to the monitor to try and distract myself by inspecting the Koala’s physical appearance once more. Thankfully, by some Star's blessed intervention, Bernard had the exact same idea.
“Koala’s are rather squat in stature, ranging around sixty to eighty-five centimetres in length and weighing little more than fifteen to sixteen kilograms at their full size. As you can see, the fur of this fellow before you is a lovely silvery grey, but their fur can also sport a chocolaty brown hue as well. Arguably the most distinctive part of their appearance is their head, being rather large for their body size and having rounded ears, a large nose, and a pair of small eyes. These are often brown but variations do occur.”
It didn’t slip past my notice that Bernard didn’t bother to point out that the Koala’s eyes were forward facing. I didn’t think he’d simply forgotten, so perhaps he just felt it wasn’t necessary given that he’d already stated it was herbivorous. Either way, no one stuck up a paw or tail to question him.
“Now this will hardly be surprising considering how long they sleep, but Koala’s are largely sedentary and it’s rather easy to see why when you have a look into the contents of their diet.”
With the press of a button the Koala on screen was replaced by images of vibrant green vegetation. Soaring trees and flowering shrubbery weaved together across landscape framed pictures pulled admiring trills from the herd, the diversity of the plant life being shown standing as a reminder that it wasn’t only animal life that flourished on Earth.
After giving everyone the chance to take in the picturesque scenes, Bernard casually hammered that point home, “This is eucalyptus or, more accurately, a choice selection of more than 700 plants belonging to the eucalyptus genus, though the Koala itself favours 30 of them in particular.”
700!? Stars…
Realising that my ears had drooped in my momentary awe, I twisted them back to tune into the lesson, only for them to splay out in shock at the next words to come out of Bernard's mouth.
“The leaves of these plants are the primary food source of the Koala and there are a couple things worth mentioning when talking about these plants. For starters they do not have much nutritional or caloric value, leading to the Koala’s low-energy lifestyle. Additionally, they contain toxic compounds.”
A shiver instantly ran through the herd, ears flicking rapidly in confusion and alarm followed by a few quizzical whispers. It didn’t take long for someone to decide to give a proper voice to the murmuring.
“Excuse me Doctor. Did we hear that right? Their diet is made up of toxic flora?” Vlek’s grumbling incredulity cut through the herd's mutterings with ease. Until Kailo’s recent change of heart, the fifty something rotation old blonde Venlil had been a close second in terms of scepticism. Mercifully his rebuttals had always been relevant questions as opposed to ranting diatribes, so he at least remained on topic if nothing else.
Bernard nodded in confirmation, smiling back at Vlek while absentmindedly twirling the end of his moustache, “You heard me right, they do indeed consume plants that are toxic. Just not to them.”
Any worry or uncertainty still clinging to the herd was swept away by the provision of the glaringly obvious answer, leaving me chuckling inwardly at the oversight.
Ah of course! The plant might be poisonous but they’ll have evolved to deal with that. Stars… I’m so used to expecting the unexpected with Earth that I didn’t even consider the simplest solution.
“I see, thank you Doctor,” Vlek replied, a tinge of interest still audible in his tone, “I assume they’ve developed some adaptation to become immune to the harmful effects?”
The question immediately evoked a smirk from our teacher, but he hurriedly suppressed it while bobbing his head, “They have indeed. There are several factors that aid in their digestion of eucalyptus leaves without succumbing to the plant's baleful properties. The first is a part of the intestinal tract called the cecum. It contains a microbiome that allows the Koala to digest the eucalyptus. Coupled with this is an enzyme in the Koala’s liver that helps them break down the toxins. They are also capable of sniffing out the plants with the least amount of toxins, ensuring that they ingest as little as possible.”
Pausing for a breath Bernard looked back at the screen before turning to face us, another grin curling at the edges of his mouth as he continued with his explanation, “This is mostly for adult Koala’s, because while their young also possess these same adaptations, they don’t just go straight to munching through foliage right after being born. No, they need a little help making that jump and getting a stomach full of all that good gut bacteria. It’s nothing bad, but those of a sensitive stomach may wish to prepare themselves for this next part.”
Bernard’s assurances did little to assuage the concern that his warning had foisted upon us. Having been exposed to so much of the weirdness Earth had to offer everyone always ended up on edge whenever Bernard gave advice like this, even if he did say it in jest.
What strange nonsense thing do Koala pups do then? Judging by the way he’s acting it probably isn’t something as simple as drinking milk from the mother. Hmmm…
“So,” Bernard began, snapping us from our pensive stupor, “Young Koala’s, known as joeys, have a gestation period of thirty-five days on average, which is approximately forty-two paws. Once born they travel from the birth canal to a pouch in their mother so that they can continue to develop and grow. In the pouch the joey finds and latches onto one of two teats and these provide the newborn with a steady stream of nourishing milk. It spends the next six to seven months growing in the pouch, its eyes, ears, and fur all developing as time goes on.”
Okay, interesting. But this is exactly how I thought it’d go. What’s different?
The unexpected normalcy of the Koala’s birth and growth cycle had calmed everyone's nerves, only to be replaced with an air of suspicion as we waited with rapt attention for Bernard to drop the other claw and upend our expectations like he always did.
Not wanting to keep us in further suspense he forged ahead, the tempo of his voice picking up as the smile started to crease his face once more, “Now to make the switch from milk to eucalyptus, the mother also feeds the joey a substance called pap. It comes from the cecum I mentioned earlier, and contains all the gut bacteria required to help the young Koala in making the switch to eucalyptus.”
He stopped and looked around, searching us for a reaction to what I felt was a rather bland statement of fact. What was it he was saying without actually saying? Koala pups drink milk to mature and then include this pap substance so that they can start eating plants. I don’t see what-
The cecum is part of the intestine.
I blinked.
I blinked again, the intrusive interruption scouring my brain clean of any other thought bar the one it’d just implanted itself in the forefront of my mind.
Oh stars. They-
“They eat their own poop!?”
The shocked bleat shattered the peace of the room to reveal that most if not all of us had come to the same tail curling conclusion. As the hall filled with unrestrained vocalisations of disgust, an ‘Ugh’ over here and a ‘Blegh’ over there, Bernard’s own bellowing laughter joined the throng of voices.
“Ha! Everytime! Each and every time. Clearly it doesn’t matter if my students are Human or Venlil. Whenever someone learns about the Koala’s dietary development the reaction is the same!”
Pleased with himself beyond reason, Bernard chuckled away while the rest of us grappled with this ghastly reality. While there were plenty of animals that feasted on things that ranged from simply unappealing all the way to the stomach churningly grotesque, I’d never heard of an animal that actively consumed the excrement of its own species. Benefits aside, the prospect of having to do that to survive to adulthood sent a shiver of revulsion down my spine.
Ewww… Stars, I hope I forget this feeling by 2nd meal. They’re serving sturen and magamroot stew later. I was really looking forward to it.
With the herds mood beginning to temper Bernard tapped the podiums controls, removing the verdant collage of eucalyptus to display several similar yet distinct environments, still chortling merrily to himself in the process, “Ok then, with that little foray into their diet complete, why don’t we look at their habitat in more detail? As you might imagine given their diet and arboreal nature, Koala’s live in forested regions, and can be found in tropical and temperate zones. About a century ago they were classed as a vulnerable species, however efforts were made to turn this around and increase their numbers. Sadly the largest factor in their decline was human activity, as the fertile lands that gave rise to their bountiful forests were coveted farm land for our settlements.”
It was strange to hear Bernard so matter of factly admit to humanity's negative impacts on other species. He’d alluded to such things in the past but always with an air of caution, carefully pawing the line between honestly answering a question while not painting humanity as uncaring and destructive. AKA, the ‘predators’ we’d all initially expected them to be.
Perhaps his comfort in making such admissions was a reflection of the class's comfort with him, for no one so much as batted an ear. Even Kailo, who I would’ve expected to jump at the chance to use this as a prime example of predatory danger, only flicked an ear in stern yet silent concern.
A cough from Bernard drew my attention back, a new picture on screen that showed a forest from a bird's-eye view. Drawn across the image were around a dozen ringed areas, some bordering one another while others overlapped to some degree. It took me a moment, but I soon recognised that what I was looking at was a map, the rings representing what I assumed to be territories. And it didn’t take much effort to guess who each one belonged to.
“From habitats we move onto behaviours, so let’s start with territories. Koala’s are solitary animals. Yes, despite being herbivores. Considering they’re only awake for roughly four hours of the day I can hardly blame them. Lots to do and not a lot of time to do it. Jokes aside, once they mature they are quite independent, carving out a little slice of land for themselves, as displayed in this example, called a Home Range. That is not to say they go it alone and leave everything else behind however. Rather, as shown in the map behind me, they live in their own space while still being part of a larger social group.”
With another press of his pad the picture was updated to show one of two symbols in each segment, along with a key to the side of the map displayed in helpful Venlang. A quick glance told me that the symbols were representing whether the territory belonged to a male or female of the species.
“As you can see there is quite a bit of overlap between different Koala’s territories. It is in these areas that most of the socialising takes place between neighbours. The trees in these locations represent the few areas where intrusion across territories is acceptable for the sake of social interaction. Outside of that the Koala’s stick to their own territories for the most part, with the exceptions of Koala’s who are passing through, attempting to become part of the social group themselves, or dominant males who sometimes go off into another Koala’s range. But how do they know where one range begins and another range ends you might ask? Well, this brings us onto the next part of the lecture. How do Koala’s communicate?”
Wiping away the map from the monitor, Bernard loaded up a video of a Koala sitting in a tree and pressed play. Head held high, the Koala’s body shook as it belted out a reverberating call into the wilderness that could only be described as a garbled combination of a car engine failing to turn over mixed with the hiccups of someone with a particularly sore throat.
That’s how they sound? Oof that must be rough on the lungs.
I clearly wasn’t the only one to share such a thought, because I clocked Sandi tracing a paw along her neck as the noise went on, ears fluttering in discomfort at the noise.
Bernard himself cleared his own throat as the video came to an end, minimising it and replacing it with another image of a tree with a Koala rubbing up against the bark, “I think they’ve got me beat on who’s got the deeper voice!”
His joke garnered several amused beeps, a rare reaction that caused a beaming smile to shine across his face at lighting speed, “Oh you’re too kind. I’ll be here all week. Now where were we? Oh yes! Communication. As you’ve just heard, Koala’s are capable of loud low pitched bellows that can carry over vast distances. These express everything from ‘Hello I’m over here’ to ‘This is my turf, stay away’. Bellowing is more common in the males than the females, opting for shouting matches as opposed to outright fights when it comes to asserting dominance. Other vocal expressions include grunts, wails, and snarls if they’re acting particularly angsty. Mother and joey pairs also communicate through gentle clicking, squeaking, and murmuring sounds. And there’s one more thing worth mentioning. Something they have in common with Humans and Venlil when it comes to emoting.”
Really? They do something we do?
Curious, I pressed myself against the desk, straining as close as I could to once more scrutinise the Koala’s features. Not a lot stood out to me at first, the grey marsupial not sharing many similarities with a Venlil that I could identify.
Ok think. We show emotion with our ears, tails, and our wool on occasion. They don’t have tails so it’s obviously not that. Wool standing on end is more a reaction than a conscious expression. So it must be the ears then.
To my quiet satisfaction, my hunch was soon validated by Bernard, “As well as their vocalisations, Koala’s are very emotive through their facial features. Just like humans, they use their mouths and lips to show how they feel, but these tend more towards the aggressive side of the scale than what you might see on a human. Regarding yourselves however, Koala’s utilise their ears in tandem with their mouth movements when showing strong emotion.”
I was delighted to hear that my assumption was correct, a little happy flick twisting out through my tail and bapping against my chair with a muted thump against the plastic.
Hehe yes! Got one right!
“Now then, we are getting close to lunchtime so I’ll finish this segment off with something I think you’ll find particularly interesting. Diplomacy.”
Perplexed mutterings followed in the wake of the bizarre inclusion to the lecture, my own thoughts being dominated by bewilderment as I tried and failed to make sense of how the two could possibly be related.
Why would Koala’s, or any animal for that matter, be linked to diplomacy? Hmmm...
I could understand dispatching exterminators to deal with a predator issue as a show of goodwill, that at least includes animals, but Humans aren’t like that so I think I can safely scratch that off the list.
Maybe the humans who live in that region benefited from Koala’s in some way. Could they have gotten something from them? But what?
Hopefully not what the pups get from their mothers.
Agh no! Begone awful intrusive thoughts. Blegh! I don’t need that in my head.
As I wrestled with the short-lived revulsion inflicted upon me by my Star's damned subconscious, Bernard placed a new image on screen, one that was decidedly different from all that had preceded it.
On screen were more than a couple dozen pictures of humans. Some were pictured alone while others congregated in large groups while cameras surrounded them from all angles. Across all the images, I noted two common themes. First of all, a solid majority of the humans were wearing formal wear similar to what I’d seen worn by UN representatives on TV. If the gaggle of journalists in the background of the photos didn’t already confirm my suspicions, then it was this similarity which made me conclude they were all people of some importance. Likely politicians judging from context clues.
Secondly, each of the individuals was interacting with a Koala in some form. Some cradled one against their chests while others were feeding it eucalyptus leaves or pellets of some kind. One of the assumed politicians had become an impromptu bed for a snoozing bundle of fur, a gleeful smile spread across their face as they lovingly gazed down at the sleeping Koala in their lap.
As I continued to stare at the assorted photos something clicked into place, a sudden spark flickering into life. A burgeoning light of comprehension that flared and swelled with every wide-eyed breath I took. Some things still escaped me, things I hoped would soon be explained, but in staring at all of the humans happy smiling faces, I was struck with an instant of pure understanding.
If someone, say a Nevok for instance, offered to gift me a creature that was common to them but which might exotic and breathtaking to a Venlil, how could my feelings not be swayed? How could I walk away from that encounter and not have grown closer to them as a result?
“Koala diplomacy,” Bernard waved his hand up at the monitor, a slight reverence in his tone, “My favourite kind of soft power diplomacy. Where political leaders take photo ops with Koala’s and, on occasion, the Australian government loans Koala’s to other nations for a time to bolster positive relations. It certainly helps that Koala’s are a beloved animal worldwide, drawing large crowds and revenue for countries fortunate enough to host the adorable critters.”
The truly alien concept predictably sparked instant discussion in the herd, two polar opposite schools of thought swiftly cementing themselves as the most popular opinions. Simultaneously, I heard one voice trill excitedly while another scoffed at what they clearly saw as a ridiculous and offensive notion.
“Squee! That’d be so cool! I’d love to get the chance to see a Liri from Coila. Remember the Rainbow Boa? Think of that shimmering effect and colour but put it on a bird! Ah! I’ve only heard their song on video. It’d be a treat to hear it in person!”
Ooo! I’ve read about them! I’d love to get up close to one.
“Loaning. As if animals are property to be hoarded and traded? Pugh! Another predatory trait the humans don’t want to acknowledge for what it is.”
Ugh, typical. Jump right to the worst possible option.
However, despite my dismissal of their disparaging fumings, an uncomfortable thought pressed upon my mind. While it was plain to see how much humans cared for the Koala, it didn’t change the fact that humans did keep animals as property just as the scornful herd member had said.
This begged a rather important, disquieting question. Aside from keeping some animals as cattle, a stomach tightening minefield I had no desire to step a claw onto right now, how else did humans keep other creatures. And how did they treat them?
Before I was fully conscious of doing it my paw was in the air, the question primed on my tongue.
Noticing my elevated paw Bernard pointed at me, smiling warmly, “Yes Rysel? What’s on your mind?”
Sorry Bernard. I hope this one’s not too awkward for you to answer.
Flicking my ear in appreciation, and waiting for everyone to settle enough so that I could be heard, I voiced my concerns as neutrally as possible, “Thank you Doctor. I uh, just had a thought. We know that humans keep certain animals for… particular reasons, and we know why. From how you’ve spoken about Koala’s I think it's fair to say that the same cannot be said for them. However, this makes me wonder, what other reasons do humans have for keeping animals and how do you treat them?”
A flash of surprise blinked across Bernard's eyes but vanished so quickly that it felt like I’d imagined it. Had he not expected such a question? Maybe he was just shocked that it’d been me who’d ended up asking it?
Stars, am I so predictable that no one expects me to ask difficult questions?
Unfortunately, a quick glance at my deskmates seemed to prove that to be the case, as both Sandi and Kailo were looking at me with differing degrees of astonishment flapping in their ears.
Well speh.
“A very good point Rysel, certainly one that’s worth raising. Yet another example of you all anticipating what I have to say before I can bring it up myself.” Bernard tapped the podium, switching off the monitor before returning his focus to me, “We won’t be needing that. I’ve nothing prepared that I can show you and we’re heading to lunch in a few minutes anyway. Still, that’s plenty of time to give you a bit of an answer.”
A bit? What does he mean just a bit?
Made even more curious by Bernard's preempted admission that he wasn’t going to fully answer my query, I dialled both my ears on him, fixing him with an inquisitive stare as he started to explain with a tone that was noticeably more nonchalant than any of his previous explanations.
“So, animals in captivity for reasons other than what you already know. Honestly I would love to delve into other reasons regarding why we keep animals. However, I have a lesson plan in the works that I hope to share with you all in the not too distant future. Some of it touches upon this very topic and I’d quite like to bundle it all together. That said, I can tell you how animals in captivity are treated. In short, the answer is very well. There are a mountain of laws both on private and public interests that govern the standards and ethical treatment of animals, and breaches of these laws are quite severe even for relatively minor infractions.”
While I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t disappointed by the vague answer to what was really the bulk of my question, I was at least satisfied by Bernard’s assurances that animals in captivity, such as the Koala, were well looked after. Considering the barely subdued grumbling coming from some corners of the audience it was clear that several of the herd didn’t believe Bernard outright, but I trusted him to be honest. Additionally, the mention of an upcoming lecture focused on humans keeping animals caused quite the buzz.
I felt a mix of excitement and trepidation at exploring the topic further. He’d pretty much confirmed we wouldn’t be talking about cattle farms, for which I was relieved, but that still left a huge amount of uncertainty in what was to come.
Humans keeping animals as cattle was a forgone conclusion. As horrifying as that reality was, it was one I could understand from a detached and strictly clinical point of view. Being predators they ate meat and therefore they kept cattle. But the concept of keeping animals for any other reason baffled me.
What could be the purpose? The diplomacy thing makes sense now that I have context, but what other reasons could they have.
The class's discussions were interrupted by the recognisable ring of the break bell, the shift in attention eliciting a change in conversation from confused hypotheses to peppy conversation on how everyone was planning to spend their break and what they had in mind for 2nd meal.
“Well I can see everyone’s excited for lunch, and who am I to disappoint,” chuckling Bernard waved us all up from our seats, pocketing his pad from the podium and heading to open the classroom door for us, “Enjoy your break, get a good rest along with a hearty meal, and I’ll see you all back here at the usual time.”
As everyone else filed out I stayed behind, waving at Sandi and Kailo as they left, and pawing over to Bernard once he and I were the only ones left in the room.
Ears folded down and with an apologetic tinge in my voice I greeted him as I sidled up to him, “Hey Bernard, I uh… sorry if that last question was unexpected.”
Chortling in reply, Bernard waved a hand through the air in a sign I’d come to understand meant ‘not a problem’.
“No need to apologise Rysel. It was a good question and most certainly not a problem.”
Heh, called it.
I sighed, allowing tension I didn’t realise I’d been holding to relax itself from my shoulders, “Phew, that’s a relief. I’m glad. I’m curious to hear what this new lesson is you’ve got in store for us by the way.”
Bernard wagged a finger at me, throwing up his eyebrows in mock amazement, “Oh are you now? Well I’m afraid you’ll have to remain curious for the time being. It’s going to be quite the surprise if all goes to plan. But…”
He trailed off, glancing at me before looking to the door like he was making sure no one else was around.
Wait, is he going to tell me? Oh please yes let me know now!
Stopping myself from jumping on the spot in excited anticipation, and trying my damndest to stop my tail from wagging in equal measure, I stared up at Bernard as he stewed in his thoughts before turning back to face me.
“I can’t tell you the specifics, but I’m working with Alejandro and Tolim to get something together. A trip that’s not a trip as it were. And when it happens, I’m going to need a few of the more accepting members of the class to lend me a hand. I’m hoping you and a couple others will be able to help with that?”
A trip that’s not a trip? What does that mean? Agh who cares about that right now! Bernard’s relying on me to help out!
Still trying not to keep myself from bouncing around with pup like glee I swished my tail and nodded my head in joint agreement, happy to help with whatever Bernard had in store for us, “Of course! Anything you need I’ll be there to lend a paw. You can count on me!”
A broad warm smile lit up Bernard's face, a hand patting me on the shoulder in appreciation, “Thank you Rysel. I knew I could rely on you but it still warms my heart to hear it. And, as thanks for this and for the many times you’ve shown your support, the surprise includes a little something special I think you’d appreciate the most.”
If my earlier enthusiasm had been at a nine, then the implication of a supposed gift sent it rocketing all the way to a hundred in a heartbeat.
“Wait… WHAT!? What do you mean? What are you doing?”
As impossible as it seemed, Bernard's grin grew even wider as I almost lost myself in wool shaking exhilaration, “Call it my own form of Koala diplomacy. But I’m afraid that’s all I can say for now. Wouldn’t want to ruin the surprise even for you!”
“Oh you ass!” Whistling jovially I bapped my tail against Bernard’s leg in fake indignation, evoking a barking bellowing laugh from the man himself.
Still laughing, the two of us departed the class and made for the canteen, my rumbling stomach leading me on while my mind spun with fantastical thoughts as to what Bernard had prepared for us.
And what specifically he had in store for me.

I (30yo woman) am getting married to my fiance (32yo man) in October. We have had a relatively long engagement and got engaged back in February of 2023. Since February of this year, I had this sad feeling in my gut that my grandparents would opt to not go to our wedding. Unfortunately, this was confirmed via email on Sunday, and they gave me the excuse I was expecting them to give: the dog.
My grandparents are healthy and relatively young. About ten years ago, they randomly decided to move away from us to go live in the north GA mountains. Despite the relatively short travel time of 3hrs, they have always insisted we go up to visit (even though my mom, sister, and I are not retired and work full time with conflicting schedules; plus, we take care of my 94yo great grandmother (my grandfather's mother)) and they have gone from spending every holiday with us when they lived here, to having spent a total of 3 holidays with us in the past 10 years.
When their last dog died back in 2017, they got another one about two years after that. My grandparents have always insisted on getting nothing but purebred English setters (even though each one has had plenty of health issues because... That's what happens when you buy a purebreed), and even though they knew it would be too much dog for them to deal with in their older years, chose not just a male, but the biggest puppy in the litter that would end up in the 90th percentile in size for a male English setter. Because my grandparents live in the middle of Actual Nowhere, this dog has never been around other dogs or people, and they've NEVER left him alone, not even for 10 minutes. If they drive over an hour into town for groceries, he goes with them, or my grandmother stays behind with him if the trip is going to take too long (like the time my grandfather had an eye appointment and drove back up into the mountains by himself with his pupils still dilated...)
So for the past 5 years, the dog has been their excuse. "Well he's too strong and might not do good around other dogs" (because you didn't socialize him), "he might become destructive if we visit and stay in a place he's not familiar with" (because he never left that damn mountain), etc etc.
Now, unfortunately, he has seizures. Massive grand mal seizures that have occurred two or three times since December that have apparently led to him running off into the Appalachian wilderness for hours, or biting my grandfather, or knocking my grandmother down.
Before this stuff with my wedding, we were already getting fed up with my grandparents. My great grandmother (the one I mentioned earlier and my last surviving great grandparent of the three that I had while growing up) fell back in October and broke her hip. She was in the hospital for a couple weeks and then was transferred to a pretty shitty place for physical therapy for two months after that. All the time her dementia and paranoia getting worse. She would constantly ask where her son Greg was and why he wouldn't visit her. So we'd call my grandfather and plead for him to visit his mother because we were so tired of feeding her the same excuses every time we visited to (kind of) placate her. Despite months of this, her breaking her hip AGAIN, us worrying she'd probably die (thank goodness this didn't happen; she got transferred to another long term facility that worked wonders with her and she's walking around with her walker again like she was 70), and her 94th birthday in December... He only visited twice. And neither of those times were on her birthday. When I tell you that was the most depressing "birthday party"... It was just me, my mom, my sister, and my great grandmother staring and not wanting to eat the birthday cake that my grandfather ordered. Cold rain pouring outside and my poor great grandmother finally sighing "I thought I would see Greg for my birthday..."
So you can see that I'm already at my limit with them. So when I had conversations with them to try to find ANY kind of option to take care of the dog so they could make it to my wedding, it would be like pulling teeth. They don't want anyone to come stay with him at the house, they don't want to bother with getting a pet friendly Airbnb near the venue, they don't want to bring him to the wedding because he might get overstimulated and have a seizure and run off again--I could go on forever. So to them their only option is: don't come to my wedding. And I am sick of them using that damn dog as their go to excuse for whatever their issue is. I want to cut them out of my life for all of this.
Questions I'm sure some of you may have and that may help with context/understanding my confusion and frustration:
-Maybe your grandparents don't approve of who you're marrying? • My fiance and I have been together for six years and they have told me multiple times how much they love him. They were both elated to hear about our engagement.
-Maybe the wedding is too far away? • The wedding is in southern GA, so same state as them. The drive for them would only be 2.5 hours. I have multiple guests coming in from Oregon, and a cousin flying in from Germany.
-Are you not close to your grandparents? • They practically raised me. Our family is painfully tiny (my dad and his family were never in the picture). My mom was 20 and single when she had me, so we lived with my grandparents until I was 4. And then during a period where my mom was involved with my sister's father, she essentially was emotionally and physically absent for 3 years (ages 7-10). I was at my grandparents' house 5 days a week and they were the only ones I had to talk to at the time. My grandmother and I are so alike and her interests molded mine. My grandparents and I used to call multiple times a week just to share different bands to listen to because we have such a similar taste in music. Them telling me they're not coming to my wedding for any reason other than a fatal illness feels like having someone shove a hot poker into my chest.
-Maybe they're not fully aware of how upset you are by this? • I don't like being emotionally vulnerable, but I concisely told them all of my feelings on the matter through an email. (I simply couldn't bring myself to do it over the phone because I know I would become a blubbering mess.)
-Do you hate dogs? • I'm genuinely surprised I don't with how often my grandparents have prioritized their dog over all of their living relatives and friends. I'm an avid animal lover. Honestly, I prefer animals over people 99% of the time. We have two dogs and two cats.
I just feel like an unlovable piece of shit and wanted to vent and see how strangers felt about the issue. Feel free to give advice or scream/cry along with me.

Hi all! First off, so glad this sub reddit exists because it was a life saver when I was making decisions on my own ACLr and knowing what to expect from surgery. I'm a 2x cancer surviver, Paramedic, Rugby player, and now have been a caregiver to my partner who just celebrated 3 months from her own ACLr. I collected a bunch of advice and tips and tricks that I have used both during cancer treatment, my own experience with ACLr, and now through care taking my partner through hers. I know there have been guides before, but mine is a bit different and aimed at caregivers so I thought I'd post it here since ya'll helped me so much instead of it just circulating the rugby community every time a teammate or friend has to have ACLr or some other reconstruction. Hope it's allowed and helps!
A Cancer Patients Guide To Knee Reconstruction Recovery
A Comprehensive Guide To Surviving and Thriving In the Pre and Post-op Period Built From The Perspective of Caretaker and Patient.
Before The Date
__/__/____

Preparation

It is important to adequately prepare for surgery in the weeks and days leading up to the procedure. A significant period of immobility and reliance on support can be expected immediately post-op and will vary by procedure and personal experience. Physical modification of living space and thorough preparation allows for the immediate post-op period to be free of emergency store runs and the small inconveniences that can add up to big frustration. Not having food and drink nearby as well as other essentials may be a small deal now, but can turn into a big deal when you can no longer get those things for yourself. While physical preparation (home modifications, adaptive tools, meal prepping, etc.) are important, mental preparation is crucial to the long term success of the repair. Making small, achievable goals in the immediate post-op period and maintaining a long sighted view of recovery will make the pain and immobility that is initially experienced more bearable. Additionally, social support through a partner, family members, or friends is an essential part of recovery, as is maintaining contact with sports teams or other social groups during rehabilitation.

General PEARLs

• Pre-surgical rehab is an essential part of recovery and can improve immediate outcome so if it is a resource available to you- use it!
• Learn the basics of your procedure such as reconstruction technique, graft type, surgeons recovery timeline, where you will do your rehab, and what you should expect going into and coming out of surgery. Knowledge is power and can give a sense of control and set reasonable expectations in a situation that is otherwise out of your control.
• Seek out positive experiences and recovery stories from other people who have had your procedure and gather as much advice as possible from resources such as ACL. Know that some people will have negative experiences, everyone is an individual, and that much of your long term recovery is in your control.
• Expect and learn to advocate for yourself or the person you are taking care of. Be vocal and honest with any needs you may have and understand that issues may come up in the immediate post-operative time that you as a patient or caregiver may have to contact your surgeon to resolve. Familiarize yourself with who to call and when *before* you leave after surgery, as well as being quick to call with any questions or problems that arise. It is better to be told that what you are experiencing is normal than to sit with the anxiety of the unknown.
• Create a folder with all relevant information: Surgeons name, procedure information, follow-up appointment dates and times, phone numbers, emergency contacts, facility of choice in an emergency situation, and any other important information. Maintain this folder throughout your recovery and add paperwork as it comes.

Days Leading Up To Surgery

• Contact support people and confirm any arrangements that have been made including but not limited to: Who is taking you to/from surgery, child or pet care, transportation to first PT appointments, meals, etc.
• Recommended Items we found essential:
  • Ice Machine (Polarcube, etc) if at all possible
    • Recommend checking facebook marketplace or other second hand options, as they cost hundreds new but can be found for $40 or so used.
    • Studies have shown these do actually reduce pain and lend to earlier mobilisation and our experience has shown this to be essential not just immediately post-op but in the weeks and months afterwards so if you *can* obtain one you absolutely should.
  • Large sweatshirt and oversized shorts for surgery day, especially if you wear a bra, as putting clothes on after surgery can be a struggle and it’s easiest to just throw on a sweatshirt and shorts that fit over your post-op bandages and brace.
    • In particular, we found a blanket hoodie to be very useful both for going home and the first few days as it could stay on when moving around/when napping.
  • Neck Pillow
    • Helps with reading or other activities during long hours spent in bed or on the couch and really helped in the first two days to prevent neck strain and provide head positioning during napping.
  • Large pillows for body positioning and elevation of the leg
    • We found cheap, giant, dog beds from places like TJ Max or Marshalls to be more affordable than specialty products
    • A large, thin, dog bed (or blanket) rolled into a tube and secured with stretch bandage or tape around the surgical leg and brace helped significantly with comfort during sleep so that the leg was padded, comfortable, and the other leg didn’t get roughed up from the brace.
  • A shower chair
    • Can be found used at second hand stores like Goodwill, or cheap online
    • Easy substitute is a chair covered in a trash bag
    • Allowed showering the second day post-op which was a huge mental boost and relieved physical discomfort and achy muscles
  • Extra large leg cast cover
    • Can be found cheap online
    • Placed around outside of brace covering the entire leg initially, we then found it easier to place on the leg and place the brace outside of the cover for the remaining healing period for the incisions: We did this after the first PT appointment when it was safe to take off the brace for short periods while laying down. We acquired a second post op brace from a friend (you can find on eBay for cheap) and it was amazing to have, as we could let it dry after showering and immediately put her post op brace back on.
  • Foldable stool
    • Great for elevating the leg during transfers, while on the toilet, etc.
  • Lap Desk
    • Great for eating on the couch or in bed, but we also found it useful as a side table for holding drinks/meds/remotes/books that could be taken to whatever room they landed in at the time
    • A small table works as well, really just anything that can be used to set things on within arms reach
  • Assortment of sodas, water, seltzers, snacks, etc.
    • There is no way to know what you will want and when, but when you want it it’s nice to *have* it available
    • Appetite often decreases after surgery so make sure to have favourites on hand so that when you *are* hungry you have it immediately before your body changes its mind
  • A big bucket
    • We used a soft plastic beach type bucket from the dollar store, it was extremely useful to have to put small items in, a small towel, a spare water bottle, extra meds, baby wipes, etc.
    • Also doubled as an emergency puke bucket, as you never know when a sudden bout of nausea might hit in the first day or two after surgery
  • Extra reusable ice packs and bags of ice
    • Your home ice maker will not be able to keep up with the demands of constant icing the first week or so
    • Reusable ones are great for ‘hot spots’ and short trips where you can’t take the ice machine
  • Extra steri-strips and assortment of bandages
    • Sometimes there’s extra leakage, sometimes your steri-strips come off and you need to slap a new one on, sometimes you’re allergic to the ones they put on you at the hospital. Always consult a medical professional, but it’s handy to have these on hand just in case.
    • We also used a bulky padded bandaid to keep the brace off the healing incisions once the large post-op dressing was taken off which helped immensely.
  • Compression sleeves
    • Aside from helping with swelling these also provided a layer of protection under the post-op brace
    • We found cheap ones at Wal-Mart (copper brand) but also just bought a cheap pair of leggings a size down and cut off one of the legs to use before getting a more expensive one once swelling had fully subsided after a few weeks. Your leg will change so cheap works great at first, then you can get something a bit more substantial when you know what you’ll need long term. Now she wears high compression socks to sleep 3 months out.
  • Slide on shoes
    • Self explanatory, bending down to put on shoes becomes a chore after surgery. Avoid flip flops or other styles that can become a trip hazard.
  • Baby Wipes/Dude Wipes/etc.
    • Wiping down after you get home from surgery can help prevent that icky feeling and restore some sense of normalcy, then can be used over the next few days before you can shower more normally
  • Lotion and chapstick
    • Hospitals dry out your skin big time, and lips are often cracked post surgery from intubation/LMA placement
  • Small, easily labelled tupperware containers
    • Regular pill containers are too small to hold pain meds, OTC pain meds, anticoagulants such as aspirin, supplements, and edibles or other small things you take with your medication. We got small tupperware boxes with lids from the dollar store.
    • We found it very convenient to have six sets of meds set up and labelled with times which meant we never missed doses and could leave the next dose of meds at bedside, take them with us when going to appointments, and keep up with what had been given and when.
  • Small notebook to record med times and other important information
  • Two extra changes of clothes already setup and ready to go
  • Compression device
    • We are athletes so we already had leg compression sleeves but these days off brand versions can be bought online cheap. Studies have shown these lead to reduced pain, increased mobilisation, reduced the chance of blood clots, and there is even some evidence they help with bone healing.
    • We used it 3 days post op and beyond and her range of motion was significantly improved after the first time.
  • A yoga strap
    • Excellent for strapping to the brace and moving the surgical leg
• If possible, pick up post-op medications prior to surgery to prevent any unexpected delay in obtaining them. If this is not possible, verify that the prescription can be filled the day of the surgery by your selected pharmacy and that it has been filled prior to leaving after your surgery. Controlled substances cannot be transferred to another pharmacy without a new prescription sent directly from the provider. You do not want to be trying to get in contact with a physician in the hours after surgery, unable to manage pain, before the pharmacies close for the night.
• Do a thorough clean of your living area, it will make the time after surgery when you cannot independently do normal activities more bearable and a neat organised space is easier to function in when your body is not cooperating. Take special attention to removing tripping hazards and clearing a wide path from wherever you plan to spend your recovery and the bathroom.
• Plan to spend the first couple of days in one spot and on one floor and set up that area the day before surgery. If you have a downstairs bathroom a floor mattress or well setup couch can be your landing pad until you are more mobile and is the easiest during the immediate post-op period. That being said, if you don’t, it’s easier to get upstairs by sliding up on your bum immediately post-op when your pain is still well controlled than realise that you have no bathroom downstairs a few hours later when the pain has started to set in. Wherever you intend to land, plan on staying there at least a couple of days and bring all your supplies to that area. Plan to lay with your surgical leg on the outside of what you are laying on, this makes transferring easier.
• Have your recovery bed setup the day before surgery and prepared for when you return before you leave the day of, including blankets and your supply table setup.
• Meal prep, whether that means cooking or getting easy to make microwave meals is up to you. You won’t feel like cooking and neither will your caretaker the first few days. High protein, easy to eat meals are key! We had chicken and broccoli casserole, egg and sausage frittata, and lots of applesauce the first few days and it was a lifesaver not to have to think about meals.
• Spend some time mentally preparing for the long haul of recovery and make long term plans that fit within your timeline. For example, we planned to attend a rugby game five days after surgery *but* planned nothing else for that day and the next day. We also planned hiking trips the next fall, and other events appropriate for her timeline along the way that could be looked forward to and keep up morale. Remember that this is temporary and that it is okay to be recovering and resting, expect hard moments and days but keep things planned so you don’t get stuck in those down places.
• Eat your favourite meal and eat well the day before surgery. Your body needs fuel to recover and fasting the day of surgery sucks. As weird as it sounds, after multiple surgeries, the pre-surgery night meal of whatever I want is one shiny thing in a crappy situation to hold on to.
• Plan for what you want your first meal to be and consider making a playlist for the ride to and from surgery. Small things, again, help maintain a sense of control and comfort in a situation where you are largely out of control and these things can be done with friends or support people in the days leading up to reduce anxiety and pass time.
• Hit the gym, take a walk, do a hike, visit places or do things you enjoy but won’t be able to do in immediate recovery! We took my partners knee to one last tournament before her surgery, it helped pass time and kept spirits high.

Day Of And Immediate Post-Surgery Phase

• Maintain fasting starting at whatever hour you are told. Some people can drink clear liquids up to a certain point, others are completely nothing by mouth. Your instructions will guide you on this.
• Before leaving home double check that everything is set up how you need it and place a blanket, pillow, drink, and snack of choice in the car. You may or may not need it but if you do it is important to have. Make sure your ice packs are in the freezer ready to go!
• Bring your own post-op snack if you are picky or have food allergies, otherwise you’re stuck with whatever graham cracker and applesauce combo the facility gives you.
• Go with the flow, or as I always say “surrender”. Feel what you feel, have a cry in the car before you go in, listen to your playlist, bring your blanket or other comfort items into pre-op, tell your support person what’s going through your mind, tell your pre-op staff how you’re doing, ask all the questions, and most importantly just do what you have to do. For some people surgery can be overwhelming and the loss of control frightening, but fighting only makes it worse, so whatever you are just be it. I’m pre-op pacer myself, but some people just snuggle up under some warm blankets and wait. Either way, just let the waves take you where they go and know you’re along for the ride. Remember that future you with a healthy joint thanks you for what you’re doing today.
• Speak frankly with your anesthesiologist and utilise any pain control or anxiety control options given to you. There is no award for least meds taken or toughest patient of the day. If a nerve block is available, know that you can request sedation for its placement, and utilise that option if at all possible.
• Caregivers should bring something to keep them entertained and be prepared for a long period without update once surgery has started. Honour your feelings as well, it can be tough to watch someone you care about go through this! Consider having someone to act as a support person for you as well through text or phone, that way you can divert your own worries or struggles to them and away from the person having surgery while still making sure you are also taken care of.
• Make sure that pain is well controlled before leaving after surgery. You have more options there than you will at home and getting things under control once pain has become unbearable can be very difficult.
• Make sure you note when the next dose of medication is due, what medication they should be taking, and write it down.
• Double check contacts from your surgeons office and add any post op paperwork to your folder in case you need the information later.
• If your post-op meal requires picking up, or your prescription, try and do that immediately after leaving surgery even if you are not hungry yet. This is the most comfortable you will be for a while and your support person will be unable to leave for at least that day and night. I have been known to peruse the big gas station after surgery in search of snacks, my partner however simply waved to the nice people at the drive through and napped the rest of the way home before eating some hours later.
• Once you get home crash wherever you plan on spending the rest of the time. Don’t have friends or family over that first day. Just go ahead and sleep through the rest of the anaesthesia and get comfortable.
• Try and keep your home cool, and consider keeping the room dim for the first few hours if not days. Sleep is precious and pain meds can make you hot, and getting hot can lead to nausea. It is better to have the home cool and the person snuggled under blankets and comfortable than be trying to cool someone down who just had surgery and got too hot and is now dizzy, nauseous, and miserable. The least stimulation for the first little while the better, and naps will happen throughout the rest of the day and over the next few days. A cool, dim place lets this happen much easier than a bright, warm place where they might be overstimulated or awakened by noise or activity.
• If allowed, try and activate the quad muscle immediately after returning home and once every few hours by having them squeeze it and feeling for contraction while in the brace. Some people will be able to begin range of motion exercises immediately and if so, make sure to do them as soon as allowed even if that means just helping them by doing gentle manual range of motion movements in the brace.
• If it’s not already on, begin continuous icing as soon as you come out of surgery either by meticulously timing the replacement of ice packs or with the ice machine. Make sure to check the ice machine, replace ice as often as needed, and keep it on *continuously* for the next few days. For us this meant I checked it at every medication dose throughout the night and added ice during that time as well. We went through frozen mini water bottles and bags of ice like crazy the first week.
• Elevate the surgical leg as high as possible, placing support under the heel and calf but not directly under the knee to promote extension and prevent more headaches with gaining range of motion later on.
  • We found that icepacks directly under the knee helped tremendously with the discomfort associated with this.
• Anticipate that bathroom trips will not be fun or easy and take them extremely slow. As a caregiver allow the person to guide you on what they need and don’t need your help with and avoid grabbing or moving someone unexpectedly. Standing, acclimating to being upright, and then proceeding to the bathroom is the best way to do things and rushing will only result in frustration for both of you. A rolling chair or wheelchair can be helpful, but for some people standing up and sitting down is harder than just moving on to the bathroom. Pay attention as a caregiver and know that it is possible they may need your help getting off the toilet or back from the bathroom so be close by and available should that happen. For the first few days do not lock the bathroom door in case of an emergency.
• Place chairs or things to sit on around your path to the bathroom, kitchen, etc. And consider a small backpack or using a rolling chair to carry items around the house.
• Once you know when your next dose is, set alarms for each time your doses are due. If using the med boxes this makes doing meds and keeping track very easy, as they are each labelled with a time and all we had to do was open the box and take the meds instead of finding each bottle and dosing each med individually each time. As the days went on we were able to re-label and time the boxes as needed and remove meds as needed or adapt to what was needed when sleeping or up during the day.
  • For example day 1 would look like:
    • First post-op doses at 4pm box: 250mg tylenol, 10mg oxycodone, 5mg edible.
    • 8pm box: 250mg tylenol, 10mg oxycodone, 800mg ibuprofen, 10mg edible, 12.5mg diphenhydramine (itching and sleep), stool softener, and regular night time meds.
    • Midnight box: 250mg tylenol, 5mg oxycodone, 5mg edible.
    • 4AM: 250mg tylenol, 5mg oxycodone, 800mg ibuprofen, edible (if nauseas or restless).
    • 8AM box (preparing to get up): 250mg tylenol, 10mg oxycodone, 5mg edible, aspirin, stool softener, normal morning meds.
    • 12pm: 250mg tylenol, 10mg oxycodone, 5mg edible, 800mg ibuprofen.
    • Repeated on time, reducing pain med dose as tolerable, and refilling boxes 1x a day.
• If possible do scheduled tylenol (paracetamol) and ibuprofen (or another NSAID), alternating them on the dosing schedule, and take them religiously even through the night. This also goes for additional pain medications, which you will also need to wake to take through the night if you are prescribed for at least the first night.
• Staying on schedule might mean waking up in the night, but it’s better to be awoken to take meds than to wake up in pain and spend several hours trying to get it under control. You may find you seldom need them if your nerve block is in place, or you may just not need very much at all during your recovery. It is easier to trial run this after the first day by stretching out the time between doses from 4 to 6 to 8 and then potentially off entirely, but everyone will have their preferences.
• Eat a small snack with every med dose and keep emergency meds (extra pain med doses, nausea meds, etc.) at bedside as well as the next set of meds due so they can be taken when it is time.
• We found that edibles were a great addition to pain and nausea control after surgery. There are medication options available and having at least one option for nausea is advisable for the first few days after surgery when anaesthesia and medication can really make you want to puke.
• Expect absolutely nothing in the first few days post-op. Some people will feel well enough to move around, others will not be able to do anything but get up to use the bathroom. Expecting nothing is better than expecting more and being disappointed or frustrated. I would highly suggest not making plans until your first follow up 7 or so days after surgery.
• Be obsessive about icing, meds, any PT you have been given, and keeping track of appointments. Give yourself the best start to your recovery that you can and you will thank yourself later!

So I thought I’d leave my review since it’s summer and I’m sure others are wondering what to try. I live in Michigan and the summers here are pretty humid. I know the cooling vests/accessories are not generally recommended for humid weather so I thought I’d first try the accessory items before the vest and see how it goes.
Items:
https://canadapooch.com/collections/dog-cooling/products/wet-reveal-dog-cooling-bandana-scarf?variant=39961894158421
https://ruffwear.com/products/swamp-cooler-neck-gaiter
I personally like the Ruffwear cooling neck gaiter more.
The one cool feature I liked about the Canada pooch bandana was that they had an option to buy a kind that changes from being a solid color when dry, to happy faces appearing when wet. This is a nice feature so you know when the bandana needs to be resoaked or just taken off if it’s dry and there’s no more water.
Only issue is, i think i ordered a size too large. I ordered a medium for my Maltese mix dog who is 20 pounds. Should have stuck with a small. No matter how much i tied it, it fell off. I think it was too long for my dog so it bothered him when he walked. But I’m not even bothering to exchange it and the reason for that is, i don’t think a size small would have been useful anyway. Even if it stuck on to him, i don’t like the concept of the bandana as much as the gaiter. It doesn’t stick around him/his neck or chest enough to make a difference anyway. What’s nice about the Ruffwear gaiter is that it wraps around his neck so it stays in place against his skin and isn’t hanging out like a bandana typically does. If i wanted to cover the chest and back area that’s where a harness would come in handy. Neck gaiter i purchased in a size x-small by the way. Fits perfect. Their sizing runs differently since it’s a gaiter, not a bandana, so there’s more size options.
Now the neck gaiter i think made an actual difference. Yesterday when i took my dog out in 82-85 degree weather, he wanted to go back inside within 5 minutes and ran for his life for water, understandably so. Today i put on the Ruffwear neck gaiter for the first time and he was able to have a typical 15-20 minute quick walk around our condo complex. He was way more relaxed coming back compared to yesterday’s walk. And both days have been just as humid/sunny at around the same time both days.
Now don’t get me wrong, i don’t think this gaiter would have been as useful in humid weather for long walks/walking long trails. Unless you had a ton of water to constantly re-soak the gaiter with, but that sounds too heavy to carry on such long walks. In dry heat I’m sure it’s more manageable.
But this helped me decide to just go ahead and get my dog a cooling harness. I would be using it for shorter walks so I’m not worried about it drying up and making him hotter in the humidity. I don’t give my dog long walks if it’s that hot outside anyways, not worth risking it. He’s sensitive to heat as most dogs are.
Hope this helped anyone who’s going back and forth about the humidity issue with cooling wear. As a bonus review, i got my dog one of the cooling toys from Canada pooch, specifically the dolphin. I believe there’s 4 different animal cooling toys. He’s obsessed with it and i haven’t even soaked it yet lol!!!
I didn’t bother with the hat because i know he will get it off. Same with pavement boots. He would never allow me to get those on. I just avoid walks on pavement if it’s that hot. Luckily for me it’s easy to avoid since grass is right by my garage and door.
I’m not interested in cooling vests since my dog is always leashed when outside (unless at dog park but still needs a harness between going in and out of park and car. He’s a puller so can’t use leash with his collar.
I see that both Ruffwear and Canada pooch have a cooling harness but i think I’m gonna go with Ruffwear just because i know their material on the neck gaiter worked on my dog. That doesn’t mean Canada pooch material wouldn’t work, but i wasn’t able to test it out since the bandana design is flawed in my opinion. I’ll edit my review of the Ruffwear cooling harness once i have it. Hopefully it’s just as affective as their neck gaiter was for short walks.
TLDR: get the Ruffwear cooling neck gaiter over the Canada pooch cooling bandana in my opinion. Neck gaiter is a better design over a bandana. These items work fine in humid heat as long as it’s for short walks. Haven’t and wouldn’t try for long walks. I avoid long walks in high heat anyways, especially since it’s humid by me. Will try Ruffwear cooling harness next for the same purposes and edit this post with my review!

Sorry for the long post that follows. I've owned a Samsung Galaxy Note 10+ which I bought used 3 years ago. I'm looking for a new, better phone, but I'm very particular about what I need, and very scared of not knowing what I'm getting into.
If it's relevant, I live in Europe. I'd like something preferably under €700.
The main, big requirements are:

• Great camera (not just good, it needs to be good enough for a photographer who is used to large apertures and good dynamic range)
• Long battery life
• Dual sim

Secondary requirements:

• Not huge in size
• Good slo mo, good selfies, ultra wide lens (front or back)
• Good speakers

Things I don't care much about:

• Storage
• CPU, GPU (I don't use apps with great requirements and I don't play games)
• Headphone jack
• I know I won't miss the stylus, I barely use it anymore.

Will it feel weird if I leave Samsung? For reference, I've owned a Xiaomi (don't remember which) and a Nokia Lumia 1020 in the past (one of my favorite phones ever) and I found myself adjusting to different environments pretty easily, but when I ended up with a Samsung it kinda felt like a superior experience and I'm scared of losing that.
But am I really losing anything essential? Is there something I'm not thinking of?
From the research I've done in this sub, it seems the Pixels are popular choices (especially the new 8a), but when I compare phones with my current one, it doesn't seem like a huge difference (and I'd expect newer, more expensive phones to actually be much, MUCH better than my current one), and I'm also scared of switching to different brands when this will be the first time I spend so much money on a phone.
Tbh, I'd keep my phone if only the battery wasn't dying and if the camera was slightly better. But I feel like I'll be paying double its price for the same battery life or for CPU power I don't care about at all.

Hi all, looking for advice. Im 23, I live in Europe, ending my Engineering studies next year(Bachelor’s degree in electronics) , somewhere along the way i realized altough its cool and all, its not really for me. I have worked 10 months as a testing engineer in a big company. I quit because i had some stuff going on in my private life, then decided to go for software developer internships, got a few interviews in decent companies, but didnt make it past the last round due to the size of my portfolio(thats understandable as im fighting CS guys who have some decent projects while i had pretty much none). Now altough I have some programming projects lined up for the summer which i want to do and create, i recently have learned about sales, seems to fit me, altough you never know for sure, also as i have realized its hard to break in. Im really outgoing, extroverted and not scared of talking to people, i can make bread out of shit when i talk with someone. From experience i know this working 9-5 as an engineer would make me unhappy, i have done this once for almost a year and i was far from happy. In my last position i used to work in a team and i was talking to clients a lot, doing lots of analysis and presenting those to the clients, collaborating with client engineers on different projects, thats the part i actually enjoyed, thats also one of the reasons Im thinking about sales, its not the same, but similar. I sure as hell can talk and also listen, would say my engineering knowledge is not over the top, but helping people, talking and thinking whats best for them is definitely one of my strongest qualities. Any advice to which direction i should look forward to? Also when reading about sales online, i have seen lots of engineers doing well in sales, i know it depends on the person. I know trying it would give me some amazing skills, but dont know if its worth it, especially here in Europe.

I am 6 ft 5' 250 lbs. And was just booked on Southwest. Not my airline of choice due to my size but not my choice. My understanding is I did get Business Select.
I don't fit in normal coach.
What is the best way to navigate this? I am not going to play the size game to get another person bounced off the flight so I can buy another ticket. I am actually not in favor of the free seat policy for certain sized people.
I am curious what the options are. I don't mind purchasing anything. I don't want to be a pain to other passengers especially if my knees are forcing the seat in front of me forward.
Thoughts?

Hi all! I wanted to share a funny series of events from me and my friend's DnD campaign. We're a good sized group; seven in total (including the DM). We've just finished our 8th session and we're playing through the Curse of Strahd.
None of us have played through a whole campaign before and only three of us have played some form of Dnd, being the DM, me (Elven FighteRogue) and our Tiefling Paladin (who is obsessed with BG3).
It was our third session and we'd been exploring the "Death House", though we decided to explore it in the most awkward. Way. Possible. Much to our DM's frustration.
First thing we did was go all the way upstairs.
For some character context, my character is from a noble family and the other players don't actually know his specific race, other than the Paladin and Bard, a Goblin-raised Human (who is my character's rival/love interest) as we have made some above-table plans.
Anyway, my character was the first to climb the stairs. The Bard decided to push my character out of the way so he could get there first, and my character pushed back because he's not gonna take that. This resulted in the two scuffling on the stairs until the Paladin pushed past them, with the Dragonborn Ranger and Gobin Cleric following close behind.
(This was before our sixth party member's first session.)
My character decided it's not worth it and went back downstairs.
The rest of the party got to the third floor, and found a suit of armour, when the Paladin brushed off some dust. This triggered combat that we were very unprepared for, and the Bard shrieked, which brought my character back upstairs in time to perform a sneak attack.
After we somehow survived the fight, we went back downstairs to the ground floor. We destroyed the cupboard with the health potions we were meant to find earlier (we smashed half of them) and I tried to take all three crossbows that were available even though my character could not carry one of them, largely just because OOC I didn't want the Paladin's player to get them for a platonic sibling rivalry reason, which led to the events that happened later on in the next session.
We eventually made it to the attic, somehow bypassing all the lore the DM had planned, and reached the basement without exploring the first or second floors.
We made it to the servants' quarters in the basement where we met our sixth party member (a Human Warlock), who hadn't played before and stayed quiet for most of the session. My character and hers only said their names to each other.
The Paladin, Bard and I went searching for loot in separate rooms while the Ranger and Cleric decided to check out the well. The Ranger was able to get the bucket off the pulley, and the Cleric volunteered to sit in it and be sent down. The DM kept trying to take their attention away from the well, but the Ranger's player accused her of keeping secrets and continued to send the Cleric down. The DM was sort of laugh-crying at this point.
Meanwhile, my character was searching through chests in the bedrooms. I found a coin pouch made of human skin, and the Paladin decided to grab him and started to DRAG him TO THE WELL. Obviously, I started to panic. I made a strength check to try and wriggle my way out, but the Bard decided TO HELP HER. So I failed my strength check. I tried again, but ended up failing that too, even without the Bard's interference. I tried to persuade the Paladin to let my character go, when the Cleric, who was already halfway down the well at this point, decided to yell up "I'll wave at you on your way down!"
At this point, my voice had gone up three octaves and I was actively trying to keep my guy alive and stay in character while I did it, which was hard bc I hadn't entirely figured him out yet, and also because the Paladin was trying to THROW HIM IN A WELL.
Eventually, I offered to pay her to NOT throw me in a well, to which she stopped and said "Give me the skin pouch."
For some reason. That sibling rivalry came back.
Instead of just giving it to her, I refused and she started dragging me to the well again. I freaked out again and started pleading with her, which she refused. The Bard and Ranger both told me to just give it to her. The Paladin reaches to pick my character up and I quickly changed my mind and said I'd give it to her, but asked if we could split the coin inside it.
I genuinely do not know why I did that.
She stopped and with a straight face said "Oh yeah, I don't care about the money, I just want the pouch."
My jaw dropped. Both me and my character yelled "That's all you wanted? The skin pouch!?" and she just replied "yeah, it's human skin?" like it was an obvious thing to want.
I gave it to her empty, while the Bard called me a rich boy or something, and my character kind of just collapsed from the stress.
The Cleric came back out of the well in a bucket full of "Goblin water", which he then tried to throw on my character. I dodged it, but the Bard saw that there was some left and successfully drenched my poor FighteRogue.
The Warlock then decided she wanted to try dry him.
So she hits with him Eldritch Blast.
Obviously, that's not how that works, so my poor, stressed, drenched Elf is not only mildly scared of the Paladin, but now also the Warlock, and is now hurt (I took 9 hit points).
We spent an hour at that well. The session ended about ten minutes later after fighting, killing and then havesting a Grick. (The Paladin ate the Grick meat next session and got poisoned, despite having normal rations. But not before she tried to keep said Grick as a pet.)
The sessions since have been the same level of chaos, but we're all clearly more comfortable with our characters so it's far more consistent. Hope you enjoyed this retelling as much as I have. I'm going to finish drawing up the comic of our game at some point so I'll hopefully have more wacky adventures to share.

I'm seeing this over and over again. The scenario goes like this:

• someone mentions that they are masking with N95 and have successfully avoided repeat infections
  
• someone else chimes in and says 'hey lots of us are masking consistently and also still getting sick, it's not enough', and then inevitably it gets raised that maybe the first person is actually getting asymptomatically sick, or they won't avoid infection forever, or some other dismissive comment.
  

then person #2 immediately reveals that they have non-masking kids in school, or hang out unmasked with extended family who aren't covid safe, or some other scenario that reveals to everyone else exactly how they keep getting sick.
But people just don't seem to get it. I'm not sure where the disconnect is.
It doesn't matter how good your mask fit is, if you're getting sick when you're not wearing the mask at all! The mask is not a good luck charm and the virus really doesn't care if you're paying close attention to the fit and size and everything, if you're exposing yourself in other scenarios. You're not giving your masking strategy a chance to work.
Granted for people with school age kids this other gap can be really, really hard to close, maybe impossible, or it can feel that way. But I wish the people in these situations could refrain from shaming those of us who actually are able to implement a gapless strategy, or implying that we're just lucky.
Maybe I'm lucky to have the life circumstances that make masking 100% of the time I'm inside with anyone other than my partner something I can do. I'm definitely lucky to have a partner who's on the same page and who I know is masking when they are inside with anyone other than me.
But if you don't have these things, that's not a reason to be skeptical of others' safety strategies or, worse, try to undermine them. Sure it's hard to have a bulletproof masking strategy but for lots of us it is far from impossible.
When we tell people their strategy isn't actually working or can't work forever we're undermining covid safety generally. We're making the effective tools seem less effective and making everyone else less likely to use them. It's counterproductive.

In advance i'm sorry if this isn't a right subreddit to ask this question, but i feel like you guys could help.
My friend's birthday are coming up next month, and i came up with an idea to get him a miku binder. He mentioned a couple of times that he needs a new one, and he's also a big fan of both Hatsune Miku and Hamilton so this seems like a perfect gift for him. The problem is that i have no idea about binders nor bra's since i'm a cis guy, so i have a couple of questions

1. Is it even appropriate to give him a gift like this in the first place, or is binder one of these things that people should buy themselves? (assuming i know what size he needs)
   
2. I found a listing for a "miku binder" on PAOM with a pretty accurate design, but in the description it says it's a sports bra, and as far as i'm concerned it's not the same thing, so i'm assuming this won't do. I haven't found miku binders for sale anywhere else, but i want to ask if any of you guys know where else i can get one that is an actual binder. (and also if i could get away with getting a sports bra or if it's inappropriate go gift a bra to a man)
   
3. If it turns out that they aren't sold anywhere, do you know anyone who could make a custom one? I was also considering making one myself, and here i also look for advice on the best way to do it.
   

Thank you all in advance