My mom is obsessed with her self and her work crush. It’s all she chooses to talk to me about, and it’s getting to the point that I can’t even support it. Yesterday, I called my dad up to help me understand a concept from science, and he was busy, so he told me to ask my mom. My mom was at dinner with her work crush, and when she came back she was mad at me cause my dad called her to ask where she was. she said I got her in trouble and it was not fair, but like are u deadass a 13 year old girl?? When my entire family is around, she chooses to talk ab her boss or some drama she has with someone, and it’s always about WORK WORK WORK. She is CONSTANTLY READY TO TALK AB HER CRUSH, AND IM ACC GOING CRAZY. I was trying to eat my breakfast and it’s all she can talk to me about, before I went to bed, she came in to talk ab him and I can’t do it anymore.
If it’s not about her work crush, then it has to be about her. If my dad says something nice ab me, she has to make it about herself. If a teacher praises my work, it has to be bc she’s FRIENDS WITH MY TEACHERS?? It acc drives me mad, cause EVEN on my birthday, she made it about herself. She went out with my dad and left me at home bc she hadn’t been out in a while?? Additionally, she is obsessed with making herself younger, and has a crippling shopping addiction. She will buy slimming pills, face masks, makeup, detox tea, LED face masks, just to look younger, and compare herself to me CONSTANTLY BUT IM A TEENAGE GIRL. I need advice cause if this continues I’m acc going to say something that’s going to hurt her feelings.

Hello again velo, It's me. The guy that rides uphill in Japan. On my last post I mentioned some differences in racing in Japan saying it was for another post. Well, there appeared to be some interest in me making that post. As I mentioned then... I tend to ramble. I'm an English teacher at a small high school which leaves me with a lot of free time. I enjoy spending that time researching anything from training methodology to obscure Japanese history. I decided to use some of that time to write about road racing in Japan and it turned into... well, whatever this is. It's (sort of) a guide to racing your bike over here. I've organized it into sections, so feel free to read it all or skip through them. At the end I've attached racing adjacent notes as well as a small bio.
If this post is not appropriate for this subreddit, I understand. And while I don't want to self-promote I spend most of my time reading about Japan not only because I live here, but also because my wife and I host a podcast. We mostly ramble about our lives here as foreigners. It's mostly cultural, but as long time competetive cyclists we often talk about bikes too. We host a website where I write random articles, which is where this is ultimately hosted, with photos. If you're curious you can google my username and find us.
I tried to think about things I've learned along the way and put it into writing for anyone in the future that might move to Japan and have an interest in racing. If you have any questions or see any information gaps, feel free to ask! In September we'll be moving to the Netherlands... so maybe I'll have to do this all over again then. Anyway, without further rambling, here it is.
Race License
There are actually quite a lot of road events throughout the country. However, many are marketed towards recreational cyclists. Going as far as incorporating anti-competition clauses in their rules. So what do you do if you want to race? For starters, you’ll head to the Japan Cycling Federation’s website and register for a license. It’s in Japanese, but with the magic of Google Translate it shouldn’t be too hard to navigate. This is also for those currently residing in Japan. I think otherwise you would need an international license issued from your country’s governing body.
While on their website you can check the calendar of events that are scheduled. But, it’s not as simple as where I am from (USA) where once you have a license you can register yourself for almost any event and just show up.
Race Organizers
In most cases while the JCF is the licensing body, they are not the event coordinator. Events are hosted by a number of different governing bodies within the country. There’s the Japan Intercollegiate Cycling Federation (JICF), Japan Cycling League (JCL), prefectural federations such as the Yamaguchi Cycling Federation and finally the Japan Bicyclist Club Federation (JBCF). There are a lot of Js, Cs and Fs in the acronym lexicon over here. In this post I’ll be focusing on the JBCF because it was sold to me as Japan’s premier race organizer and the highest level of racing in Japan. It also seems to have the most robust calendar of events.
Declaration of my bias and shortcoming: The JBCF is the only organizer I’ve had any meaningful experience with. No, they’re not paying me. However I have won a cool towel, a coffee cup and some bar tape at their events. Actually I’ve given them quite a bit of money…
Teams
So you’ve got your JCF license and like me you’ve decided to participate in the JBCF. What’s next? Register for a JBCF account, sign up for events, race your bike? Almost. You do need to register for an account. After that, you need to find a team. That’s right, you need to be registered with a JBCF team to participate in races. This was a surprise to me and also a barrier to entry at first. As a new resident of Japan I didn’t know anyone here let alone a team that would let a random foreigner join.
How’d I do it then? Well, the first team I joined was through a friend of a friend of a friend. My second and current team I ended up getting to know because I took a bunch of KOMs around my new home. I guess Strava KOMs are worth something after all. If you’re looking for a team you could start by asking local shops, they often have a club organization that you can sign up for. If you’re desperate you can also make your own team. It used to only require two people, but I think they increased that to three or four.
Costs
I’m writing this in May of 2024, so the costs will be current as of that month. The USD to JPY conversion is sitting around 1 USD = 155 JPY.
Your first cost will be the JCF license fee. In my case, an elite rider over 23 years old, it was 5,000y for an e-license and 6,300y for the physical one. My first year I used the e-license, but my second year I paid for the physical one as a cool souvenir.
Beyond the license. You’ll need a team kit (bibs & jersey) and you may also be required to pay the athlete registration fee. To join my E1 team in 2024 I paid 43,000 yen. That included one team kit and the registration fee plus some small accessories (gloves, bottle, etc.). In E1 I paid all my own entry fees, which were approximately 8,500y per race.
My JPT experience was a special case. I paid roughly $1,200 (usd). But I received two kits (jerseys & bibs), a speed suit (SS skinsuit), windbreaker, vest, socks, etc. I also had the benefit of the “pro” treatment at races with lots of assistance. Was it a cold rainy day? I could ask for embro and they’d oil me up with a little massage. Needed a bike wash, snacks, or a trainer to warm up on? All provided. And all of my entry fees were covered. I never paid those out of pocket. It was a really cool experience and honestly I think I got my money's worth just in the races that I attended, let alone all the extras. Plus the team was above and beyond hospitable. A really great bunch of people.
Categories
Once you’re on a team you’re good to go! So which category should you race in? The JBCF has 5 big categories: Japan Pro Tour (JPT), Japan Elite Tour (JET), Japan Feminin Tour (F), Japan Youth Tour (Y1 & Y2), and the Japan Masters Tour (M). JET is further broken down into E1, E2 & E3. The general idea is male riders start as E3 and through results they work their way up to E1. If they’re highly motivated they’ll target a placement on a JPT Team.
Unfortunately for the women, I believe there is only one lump “Female” category. But in one of my most recent races a woman lined up with us for our race start. So that may be an option. For the Youth there’s U19 & U17. Masters is similar to the women’s category and I believe there is simply one “Masters” event, without age ranges.
Using what I know (USA Cycling Categories) I’ll try to make a comparison. E3 is your Cat 4/5 or Novice rank. E2 is around Cat 3/4 and E1 is roughly one big P/1/2/3 field. JPT is something like the US’s Domestic Elite field. Some JPT teams (and even some E1 teams) are UCI Continental teams. Although, honestly, some JPT riders are probably equivalent to strong Cat 3s.
In America I raced as a Cat 2 on the road, albeit I was a pretty weak 2. My first year in Japan I raced JPT and was able to hang in the peloton and finish events. My second year I raced as an E1, where I was very competitive and able to fight for podium finishes. That’s my experience and my basis for the above comparisons.
Events
Once you’ve got all the above figured out, it’s time to finally race! The JBCF organizes the following events: Road, Criterium, Hill Climb, Time Trial and Track. Criterium, Time Trial & Track are pretty similar to what you’d find anywhere else in the world. So for this post I’ll really just focus on Road and Hill Climb.
It’s worth noting that except for track, all of these events take place on public roads. But, unlike the USA, it seems the general rule in Japan is that for a race to be a “race” the roads need to be closed to traffic. Sounds great, right? Right! Or, mostly. Japan is a beautiful country with incredible scenery and fantastic road riding. Unfortunately, the JBCF uses very little of this. I think to minimize inconveniencing locals, cut costs, and make their lives easier, most of these events will take place on already closed circuits or around agricultural land (where no one lives or drives anyway). In practice they are “public” roads, but they only need to shut down one or two entrances to close off the entire loop.
Many “road” events are just very long short circuit races. A popular venue that hosts multiple races throughout the season is the Gunma Cycle Sports Center. This is a defunct cycling theme park built in the 1980s with a paved 6 km circuit. Some of the races in the higher categories can be up to 150 km! That’s 25 laps! And, they’ll be pulling riders. When I was racing JPT it was often a big accomplishment just to finish a race. It was a common occurrence for a break to get established with the big teams represented and the rest of the field to sit up, inevitably getting pulled before being lapped. It’s not uncommon for well over half of the field to DNF early on in these longer races. Sometimes to add a little spice to your life, they’ll run the course in the opposite direction one weekend.
So, I’m biased, but that style of “road racing” wasn’t for me. That’s what led me to the Hill Climb. At first, I thought it was just an uphill TT. But, it's a mass start! The last one I did was Mt. Ontake HC which was a 17.7km race gaining 1,150 meters in elevation finishing at an altitude just under 2,200m. I finished in 51 minutes. It’s more like an uphill criterium. You might explode, but you won’t get pulled. It’s also, of course, point to point.
Good things to know about a Hill Climb are the controlled descent and luggage delivery. When you finish you’ll be waiting at the top of the climb for all other riders and categories to finish. Sometimes this means you’re waiting for an hour or more! Thankfully the morning of the race you can give a bag to the organizers and they will deliver it to the top of the mountain. This is a great way to make sure you have extra layers and snacks waiting for you. Just make sure it’s packed in a bag that you can then easily carry with you on the descent.
Be extra mindful of the forecast. At Ontake in 2024 we started at the base of the mountain in temperatures around 16 celsius. At the summit it was 7 degrees and it started to rain! Thankfully I had a teammate who had driven to the top (you must register your vehicle) and he gave me a lift back down. If you’re riding down, the descent will be done in waves which are chaperoned and controlled by officials on motorcycles.
Registering
I can only tell you my experience and I’m not certain that this is how it always works. When I was in the JPT, I never paid for an event. Each team could send six riders and the team manager made a selection based on which riders requested to go to which event, they would then register you to go. In my E1 team I haven’t run into any rider maximums (we only have a few E1 riders), and I pay for each event. I still tell the team’s manager which event I want to travel to, they register me, but then I pay them back.
The Day Of
The JBCF events have been very organized. The week before they will release a list of registered riders along with a technical guide. The technical guide will include information about the course, where to park, where to check in, how to pin your numbers and more. It’s only in Japanese. Google Translate will be your best friend. Or if you’re lucky you may have a teammate that can speak some English and help you out.
Usually the check in process begins a couple of hours before the start time. You’ll go to license control and pick up your numbers and timing chip. If you’re doing a hill climb and need to, this is also the period of time you drop off your luggage to be taken to the summit. Get kitted & pinned up, then go to the “vehicle control”. They will check your bike against a jig, kind of like what the UCI might use, as well as check the weight (take your bottles off the bike when you hand it to them) and make sure your numbers are pinned correctly. A keen eyed inspector may even look at your helmet to make sure it has the JCF certification sticker. You could possibly be told to change helmets if yours doesn’t have the sticker. When they tell you that everything is OK, you’ll go to the table and sign the box with your name.
There are also meetings that will be happening. But, you shouldn’t have to worry about that. If the team manager can’t be present they will send an “attendant”. This person is responsible for going to the meetings and reporting back to the riders.
Podiums & Prizes
Look how far you’ve come. After all that you’re headed to the podium, which in many events will be six deep. What should you expect? Maybe a cool trophy or a medal? It’s even better. How about a formal certificate signed and stamped by the JBCF President! That’s right, you’ll be receiving an A4 sheet of paper. And yes, when they hand it to you they’ll turn it to face you, use both hands to hand it over and bow. And yes, you should receive it with both hands and bow in return. I plan to frame and hang mine like some kind of college diploma. You’ll probably receive a prize as well. Something like what I mentioned earlier in this post, a towel, cup, umbrella, etc.
Where’s the money? If you want to hold a giant cheque with a big number (because it’s in yen) you’ll need to be racing in the top category, JPT. In this category the podium is only three deep. One time in a race I had a teammate finish 3rd and win some money. I never saw any of it, which was fair as I didn’t really contribute to his result. And I never podiumed myself. So I’m not sure how the payout actually works. Did he get to keep it all? Did the team take it? Who knows. I hope he kept it all, he’s a great guy.
Other Notes
Gachinko Cycle TV & Photo Galleries. Almost all JBCF events are live streamed & archived on YouTube! There’s a company called Gachinko Cycle TV that provides coverage. This includes camera motos as well as stationary cameras. A lot of photographers also come to the events and a photo gallery is posted on the JBCF website after the events take place.
Events & Categories. Not every event will be run for every category. A motivator for me to move from JPT to E1 was that not every hill climb has a JPT category, but they all seem to have E1. My first time racing at Ontake I was in the “Open” category and not eligible for any points or placement.
Outlier events. There are some events like the Niseko Classic (Gran Fondo World Championship Qualifier) and the Tour of Okinawa. These are one off events which are not part of the JBCF or any other federation I mentioned above. But, they are “real” road races on closed roads. There are also plenty of “cookie” rides. But be aware, like mentioned earlier, many of these explicitly say you shouldn’t come and try to ride for a certain time. I think it’s related to what I’ve been told about races having to take place on closed roads. These cookie rides likely have no traffic control. And instead of a cookie, you might get a bag of dry rice to cook later. Happened to me once.
The Hill Climb might be Japan’s most accessible event. There are actually quite a few of them around the country outside of the JBCF and they can be registered for on SportsEntry - I don’t think you need a JCF license.
What about other disciplines? I’ll toss this in here at the end because I think it’s worth mentioning. If you’re not racing Track, Cyclocross or Road… you’re not going to be doing much racing. Mountain biking is still very much in its infancy here in Japan. Despite its incredible landscape, there’s a shocking lack of good mountain biking. My wife and I moved here from Western North Carolina and she’s a former Age Group XC National Champion as well as podium finisher in events like the Pisgah Stage Race and Collegiate Nationals in STXC, XC & Omnium. So believe me, we have tried to find some good mountain biking here and it’s rough.
There are some lift-access downhill courses and we actually went to one for a “gravel” race which my wife won. This was held on what was essentially a non-technical STXC course. Disappointing is a bit of an understatement. There IS Grinduro Japan… but it’s insanely expensive and again, not really a race.
This honestly has had a big impact on our decision to ultimately move away from Japan. But, keep an eye out for developments in places like: https://www.minamialpsmtb.com/ https://namba.ngo/ https://www.nsd-hakuba.jp/iwatake_mtb_park/en/
Cyclocross has a big following in Japan and the calendar appears to be full of events throughout the season. If we were staying long term, I’d be buying a cross bike. Unfortunately I don’t have one, so I never got into that scene while living here.
Although this is mostly about racing in Japan, if you come here to race you’ll also (hopefully) be riding your bike for fun. Please be aware some laws work differently here. Although I’ve never personally run into trouble I’ve been told things like: bikes MUST use the crosswalk if turning across traffic (no turning like a car turns) & that bikes CANNOT exceed 30 km/h (a bike shop owner told me this). My wife and I have often talked about this as well… while in the USA drivers can be malicious towards cyclists, Japanese drivers are often blissfully ignorant towards them. Always ride defensively. Drivers will make eye contact with you and proceed to pull out in front of you expecting you to either not be traveling with speed or to stop for them. Even in “polite” Japan, the Car is King. I’ve had far more close calls with drivers here than I had in America. Having said that, it’s still a wonderful country to explore by bike.
Who Am I?
If you read all of this, thanks! I hope that you learned a little bit about road racing in Japan. But, who am I? I’m an American from Western North Carolina, now living in Japan. Ishikawa Prefecture to be specific. I’ve been a cyclist since 2011 when I bought my first road bike. In America I’m a Cat 2 on the road and an XC MTB Cat 1 with extensive experience training for and racing in a variety of disciplines. Road riding and racing is my true love and I honestly only got into MTB to hang out with my girlfriend. I guess it was worth it because the only National Championship medals I have are from Team Relay & Team Omnium. Oh, we ended up getting married too. So that was cool. I also got into the gravel craze thanks to the plethora of racing options in the South East. I’ve stood on multiple podiums with the internet’s favorite privateer, Dylan Johnson. And I’ve dabbled in bikepacking, bike touring & ultra endurance riding. Really, I’m just a guy that thinks about bikes too much.

first
Luna VI query: Set the source to the leaked files of the first reconnaissance operation of Irisa.
Done!
Luna VI query: What did Nathan do during the first hour of the war?
***
From the instant he opened his eyes, Nathan's morning was chaotic. It all began with the ground shaking beneath him, jolting him into a state of awareness. He then was greeted by the sight of Amara. She was leaning against a corner, covered in purple from head to toe as she screamed at someone through an earpiece that she was pressing with one of her claws.
His good morning was overhearing one piece of bad news after the other.
The rest of Amara's group had been ambushed early in the morning; many were dead, injured, or missing.
A war had erupted in the sky and her allies were trying to push back the enemy forces, but the battle persisted; the outcome was uncertain.
Zara was being brought to them, but Amara had lost contact with Igmila's group who was bringing her, only receiving confirmation from another group that a rescue pod was spotted at a distance.
And when he thought that things couldn't get any worse, he heard a bang followed by the AI reporting that Ryo had shot down a drone somewhere near their position.
"Open the tent!" Red had conquered Amara's body.
None of the scenarios Nathan had contemplated the previous night had prepared him for such a chaotic morning. "Give me a second."
He only wanted a chance to get his gun from his backpack and explain why he had it in the first place, even though he suspected Amara was already aware he had it. But she didn't let him. "Now!"
She had never felt so distant to him as the moment she said that single word, which led him to just comply as he stood up and followed her in silence. But this frail silence only masked his morning grumpiness, magnified by the dire circumstances and her cold demeanor toward him.
Nathan had barely caught a glimpse of Ryo and Elysira at a distance when he muttered. "It wouldn't have been so hard to say a few words to fill me in, you know."
Amara's eyes were transfixed on the smoking pieces of the drone when she whipped her head around, glaring at him with her orange eyes. "My people are fighting a war and dying. How can you demand my time when Yelara is hurt and barely escaped alive?"
"Oh, come on, I'm not demanding anything." He scoffed, shaking his head. "I just don't think it would have been so hard to tell me what you intend to do in the next five minutes."
The tip of her tail pressed against his chest, as red and purple coexisted on her skin.
"I am heading up the mountain to find Igmila." She spoke in a detached voice, pulling her tail back and turning around, and then she sprinted in the gap between himself and the tent.
He caught a glimpse of gray on her neck and all his grumpiness was gone, replaced by a cold shiver running down his spine. With his arms moving faster than his thoughts, he grabbed her by the tail, preventing her from going anywhere.
"You absolutely can't do this Amara." Nathan looked down at the tail he held with both hands and swallowed a lump of saliva in fear of her reaction. But that still didn't prevent him from finishing what he had to say, "It's too dangerous."
Amara's eyes sought his, causing him to suspect she would demand to be released or try to free herself by force, but she did something else. "All of this is because of you. Had I not come to your tent, I would be there to assist them."
Nathan caught a glimpse of green around her back spots, which let him know that there was a hint of guilt in her words. But did that justify blaming everything on him and running into danger without thinking?
If not for the awful night followed by an awful morning, Nathan might have just taken the blame and hugged her. But he too had his limits, "How is that fair? Blame me all you want, but nothing will change that you had all the chances in the world to go back and you didn't. I'm not saying that you could have done anything abo-"
"Indeed." Gray flashed for a moment before red flowed among her black spots. "This night was a waste of time." His grip faltered at her words and she pulled her tail back from among his fingers. "I should have stayed with Yelara to help her tend to her wounds."
Nathan bit his lips in frustration. How was it possible to agree with her words, yet still feel the sharp sting in his heart?
And if that was not enough, Ryo had to step in to rub salt in the wound.
Clap.
Clap.
Clap.
With Elysira’s tail wrapped around his wrist as she averted her eyes from Amara, Ryo spoke, "Please don't tell me you're mad because the plant lover couldn't get it up."
Nathan blinked fast not believing his eyes. Ryo was not only shirtless but there were a lot of scratches on his neck and below. Elysira’s long strands were also a mess, but even without that, their physical closeness alone would be enough of a hint of how much fun they had at night.
When Nathan glanced at Amara to gauge her reaction, she had already crossed her arms, looking at him angrily. Which immediately made him feel as if Ryo’s not-funny joke was true although he knew it wasn't.
It took Nathan a considerable amount of self-retainment to not walk up there and rearrange Ryo's handsome face with his fist, or at least attempt to do so.
A few seconds passed before he said, "Why are you here?"
Ryo didn't even bother to look at him, his eyes focusing solely on Amara. "Information. I want her to tell me what she knows about this war."
Amara didn't look pleased to help, but she still informed him about the ambush and even alerted him that even their current position would soon be unsafe.
As If things weren't already bad enough, Ryo frowned and hurried to instruct Elysira to get his things as soon as Amara had finished talking. Nathan felt like he was in a war movie where everything was happening too fast for his emotions and reason to follow.
It was only when he saw Ryo raising his gun skywards that Nathan’s anger subsided, contained by the prospect of how bad their situation was. Ryo movements were fluid and methodical, but he never pulled the trigger on the many drones that appeared high above and, instead, retreated to take cover behind a tree.
Only now the seriousness of the situation sank in for Nathan.
He didn't even care that he hadn't explained to Amara why he had a gun yet, rushing inside the tent after exchanging a glance with her.
After crossing the circular door, he found only a few items on the ground: a pair of boots, his sleeping bag, and his backpack with all his equipment inside.
Nathan was quick, wearing his boots first before retrieving his belt, knife, and holster from the backpack. With a sequence of swift movements, he strapped the sheathed knife and holster to the belt and cinched it around his waist, securing it in place before closing the backpack and dashing out the door with his gun in one hand and the backpack in the other.
Already outside, Nathan found it weirdly reassuring that Ryo was in the same spot as before, but that only lasted until he tried to find Amara, but found nothing no matter where he searched for her.
He dropped his backpack, feeling at a loss. How could he have allowed her to venture beyond his sight when he knew that guilt was clouding her judgment?
Only when he had already cupped his hands around his mouth to scream her name that he felt a touch right above his heel—her tail.
"Psst..."
Wiping his head, Nathan saw Amara's whole body mimicking the colors of his tent, making herself quite hard to spot.
"I thought you were gone." He joined her, stooping down beside the tent as relief washed over him.
"It might be too late to join my soldiers." She didn't allow her colors to change, but the translator conveyed a hint of sadness. "I lost contact with all the teams who were coming here."
"Amara I-"
Nathan was about to attempt to make things right with her when Ryo’s assertive voice reached him. "Listen up, those fuckers are jamming our comms and they will be here at any time. Take the MLBCS and find a clearing to use it, I doubt they can interfere with the laser. Just don't forget that your immediate safety comes first or else you might not be among the living when the pod arrives."
Ryo ran back to his tent as soon as he was done speaking, leaving Nathan questioning his own intelligence. How come he had never even considered leaving the planet? A single glance at Amara and he knew why. But did he have any other option?
Staying and fighting to hold his position was something he briefly considered. But did he have a chance when even Ryo decided to leave after seeing the drones?
Mission control might give him other options, so Nathan decided to try his luck despite Ryo’s warning.
Unable to establish a two-way connection.
He confirmed the interference with the communication with a single thought, kicking his backpack in frustration even though it was expected.
Why did it have to be so hard to accept that Ryo was right and leaving the planet was his best option?
But would Ryo truly leave the planet and leave Elysira behind?
Nathan forgot Amara who was beside him and screamed, not allowing this question to stay in his mind, "Wait, what are you gonna do?"
Ryo replied as he waited for Elysira, "I'm not leaving the planet unless mission control finds a way to save Ely too."
Nathan's eyes widened, feeling like an idiot as he brought up a pop-up window showing the schematics of the rescue pods. They were designed to be fast vehicles capable of transporting a single person to the space station, but Earth's government hadn’t skimped on the design, which included various components that could be discarded, such as medical supplies and search and rescue equipment.
He used the AI to run the calculations and found that Amara would likely be able to go with him, that is if they wedged themselves into the vehicle and discarded everything else.
Nathan was about to share his findings with Ryo when he caught a glimpse of him and Elysira disappearing into the woods, abandoning their tent behind as they ran away.
A sense of urgency struck him at that moment, but it was easily forgotten when Amara's voice struck even harder, "You should go."
"What do you mean?" He sought her eyes, but she avoided his gaze, facing to the ground.
"Do what Ryo suggested." She took a small pause before she went on. "Leave the planet."
"The hell I will!" He punched the tent. "Not without you." He could only assume she was saying this because she didn't know she could leave with him. "You'll come with me, and the pod will take us to the space station."
"Your species will refuse to take me." He saw a hint of purple on her neck. "Before the mission started your people told us you humans will not get involved in our wars." She finally made eye contact, and the purple on her skin intensified. "My best chance to survive this is to hide in the mountains and wait for reinforcements."
"You don’t understand, Amara." He didn't have time for a full explanation of what humans considered not getting involved. "No one in mission control will want to leave you here to die just because of some stupid rule." He then spoke his heart out without a care in the world. "And even if they do, they will take you anyway if say I won't go anywhere without you."
A hint of yellow could be seen among her camouflaged skin, but before she could say what she would do, her tail wrapped around his neck and he felt a strong pull to lower his head and bend his knees for cover.
"The rebels are here," she whispered as her ears twitched.
Nathan was tall enough to see the slope on the other side of the tent by just standing, but Amara struggled to see from above the structure, requiring her to stretch her full height and still take little jumps to take peeks.
And it was after doing so that she dropped her camouflage entirely, letting purple run free among her black spots.
Nathan took interest in what she had seen that had caused such a reaction, and he leaned cautiously against the tent and raised his head slowly, prepared to find a few armed Irisians hidden among the trees. But what he found instead was a never-ending line of Irisian advancing downhill at a fast pace towards them.
He understood Amara's reaction now, pulling back the harmer of the revolver as he stared at her. "I need to... do something."
He made up his mind, determined to shoot. But when activated the infrared view mode and took aim at Irisians descending the slope, Nathan froze for a second. This just lasted a moment, and when found the resolve to fire, he had already lifted the gun enough that it wouldn't hit anyone and it would just be a warning shot.
He fired once, twice, and went on until all six rounds were gone, then he noticed their organized marching had stopped, all of them having activated their camouflage. Some even broke the line and retreated uphill.
When he took cover again, Amara was protecting her ears with both hands, looking at him as if he were some sort of monster. Nathan ignored her and rifled through his backpack in search of more ammunition, finding the small box with shining metal bullets after he had searched for some long seconds.
It was only when he released the cylinder to reload the gun that Nathan noticed something.
His hands were shaking.
He ignored it and pressed the extraction rod the remove the cartridges from the cylinder to make room for the new ones, clumsily dropping a few of them as he reloaded.
Amara saw this and stopped him with her tail before he had filled all the chambers.
"I cannot go with you." Her body had been conquered by purple.
"You think I'll leave you behind?" He almost reached his breaking point when she replied.
"No." Her tail touched his cheek gently. "There are too many of them, Nathan." She pulled her tail back as a hint of gray appeared. "My brother will never let me go, he lost too many ships and soldiers to give up without his prize." The gray intensified, squeezing her black spots. "If you die with me on this planet, your species might abandon Irisa forever.
"My chances of hiding in the mountains are slim, but they exist... and even if I fail I will distract them long enough for you to flee."
Her body blended with the surroundings again and Nathan felt that she was about to do something stupid, but he moved faster and grabbed her shoulders, forcing her to bend her legs and join him on the ground as she stared at him with wide eyes.
"To hell with this self-sacrifice bullshit." Nathan finally decided what he would do. "Do you think I will die that easy? Guess what, you’re wrong." His hands moved from her shoulder to her back and he embraced her. "Let me tell you what we'll do, we take the MLBCS, we find a clearing, and we go to the space station." He released her and added, almost crazily. "You go with me even if I have to drag you by the tail as you scratch me, you hear me?"
He was not kidding; he grabbed her tail with his left hand, leaving her exterior filled with colors ranging from purple to yellow.
Amara was about to reply when the tent produced a thud noise, sounding as if someone had knocked on a cardboard box. When they turned to the side, there was a tiny hole in the tent dangerously close to Amara's head.
She touched the hole with her finger, and then her whole hand pressed against the side of her head, staring at him without saying a word.
Nathan's heart skipped a beat when he realized what had just happened, and consumed by a rage like he never felt before, he pressed the cylinder of his revolver back into place with just the four bullets inside, pulling back the harmer.
This time there was no hesitation, he quickly stood up and used the infrared view mode to survey the now organized groups of Irisians who had taken a defensive formation, choosing as target an Irisian who had climbed a tree and was pointing a long gun at them.
In just a moment Nathan aimed and pulled the trigger, firing one round after another. The first two missed completely, but the others hit the tree right above the target, making this Irisian panic and release his claws from the wood, only to welcome an ugly fall on the rocks below from several meters above the ground.
He took cover again immediately, but this time noise as if he was facing heavy rain under an umbrella struck his eardrums moments after he had taken cover, making him wince every time he heard the distinct noise of a projectile going through one wall of the tent and stopping the other.
With her tail still among his fingers, Nathan and Amara exchanged several anxious glances as the shooting persisted, only calming down when the rebels realized they were wasting ammunition and the barrage of fire slowly started to lose momentum.
Nathan's heart was racing and she was going through all tones of purple when she broke the silence.
"Fine!" She spoke fast. "If you are being so adamant about tying our fates together, we can do it your way." Her tail escaped his grip, but instead of pulling it back, she coiled it around his wrist. "But we are weaker together, Nathan. I will be a burden to you when you run, and you will be a burden to me when we hide."
"Oh, to hell with that too." Despite his harsh words, just knowing that they were on the same page now was enough to give him some hope. "Sorry. I do all the running and you do all the hiding, does that work for you?"
He didn't wait for her reply and loaded the gun again, this time doing it very fast even though his hands were still shaking.
"You do all the running? I fail to understand you." She said as she stood up to take a peek at the enemies, just to recoil in fear and add, "Explain yourself fast, they are losing the fear of your loud gun."
"Sure." He grasped his backpack bottom and overturned it, emptying its contents in a quick motion. With all the items on the ground, Nathan only took the MLBCS and the little box with his drones that he promptly stored in his pocket. "We won't need any of that, which means my back will be free."
"Are you crazy, I am too heavy f-"
"You're not." Nathan was 6′3″, and he had the nanites ensuring he was as healthy as a human could be. This meant that the short Amara—the top of her head only reaching a little below his shoulder—was not a challenging weight for him to carry given her slender body.
Noticing the doubt in her gaze, he lowered his body even more, turning his back towards her in a way it would be easy for her to climb, hoping this would be all the push she needed.
"You take pleasure in testing my trust, do you not?" The tone of her voice hinted at her reluctance, but she still draped her arms over his shoulder, securing her grip in a way her claws wouldn't hurt him.
Even though they had a plan now, Nathan still felt a chill down his spine at the thought of what he would have to do. And despite knowing that he had taken everything he needed, he anxiously patted down his pocket the make sure the box with the drones was there and remembered to take a handful of bullets, filling up his pockets as some of them fell to the ground.
"Ready?" He asked, trying to sound confident.
"See for yourself." Her tail wrapped around his belly, full of tiny black spots surrounded by purple as far as he could see.
Nathan took a few deep breaths and stood up, getting a glimpse of the many groups that were advancing from both sides, trying to surround them.
It didn't even take him a full second before he started firing his revolver indiscriminately at them while his legs moved on their own, not even waiting for his eyes to decide which path he would take.
Amara's weight escaped his thoughts completely, replaced by the fear evoked by the faint noise of metal breaking the sound barrier around them as soon they left the protection of the tent.
He didn't spare a single glance behind, running downhill at full throttle with bursts of adrenalin fueling his speed. He outran the reach of their guns quite fast, hurdling fallen brunches and putting not only distance but also several tree trunks between them and the hostile force behind.
With Amara's solid grip and occasional shifting of her weight to prove that she was fine, Nathan kept his pace as his muscles burned with exertion.
For a little over ten minutes he kept going, jumping over protruding roots and ducking beneath low-hanging branches. But this couldn't go on forever and eventually, he stopped to catch his breath, bending forward and letting go of items in his hand as Amara released her grip to stand on her own two feet.
His breath was coming in ragged bursts, but that didn't keep him from starting to laugh as he stared at her, whose eyes were gentle and her entire body was filled with hints of yellow.
In a split-second though, her whole demeanor changed, all the yellow giving way to purple and red.
She asked a single question, "Is that device of yours supposed to release smoke?"
The tip of her tail was pointing at the MLBCS, which now had a small hole in it from where a whisp of smoke curled upwards, just like a candle after its flame had been extinguished.
Nathan shook his head and touched his forehead; a single word left his mouth, "Fuck."
***
This was an account based on what Nathan did during the first hour of the war. The previous narrative is based on the events of the morning of the twentieth day of the exploratory mission of Irisa. According to your current settings, no queries will be suggested.
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I’m a student I’m a 19 year old student in college dating a guy I been with for going on 3 years now I have a overall good relationship with my parents though we often butt heads a lot…throughout my whole life I had a “problem with boys” it started when I was 14 I started dating of course being young and dumb i did dumb things like texting inappropriately. My parents would go through my phone and find thing an make me break up with them even if we wasn’t texting inappropriate as well…When I was 15 I met a guy who was Muslim who I started dating when I was 16 and he ended up sharing at part of his religion with me I got very close with his family but my parents are Christian so when they saw I was changing my views on my own religion and actually starting to love Islam and wanted to convert they forced me to break up with him i didn’t want to because he was also my friend so I left home and this caused a big deal… my grandma called the police on me and I got brought home being forced to now see or talk to him, quite my job( I worked with him), and not graduate early ( I was ahead and had great grades in High school). A year later I met my current Boyfriend who I truly love and I know loves me. Me and my boyfriend me 16 and 17 I am a year older. I try to hide him from my parents because I know they would probably tell me to break up with him or start going through my phone again. Which they did go through my phone and saw I was dating him and wanted me to break up with him but I didn’t! We continue dating and we wasn’t perfect we were young a dumb as well when we first started dating we wasn’t allowed to go on dates because we both didn’t have a car so I try to sneak to his house and got caught then a year ago I sneaked him into my house for a day while my parents where gone on vacation he felt uneasy because he knew my parents are strict and didn’t want to get me in trouble but we did anyway and we were successful… Until 6 months later me and my dad had been arguing because of how I felt he treats me (we have a rocky relationship and when me mad he will ignore me for weeks) this turned into a family problem because my grandma and mom got into it and he felt I was putting all the blame on him. So one day I came home after going to meet my boyfriend ate the park ( they knew I was meeting him) I came home and we got into a big argument. My dad said he doesn’t talk to me because how I act and told me how he had on camera me sneaking my boyfriend in the house. I felt really bad and knew I was wrong but confused why he just now decided to confront me about it. But why forced me to break up with my boyfriend i didn’t want to because I love him we been dating now for 2 years as well and I’m 18 but to go into college so I packed my stuff and tried to leave, my boyfriend wanted me to come stay with him till I could move into my dorm but my dad got mad and got physically aggressive and stoped me( gave me bruises on my arm). I brought all my college supplies myself man’s my mom broke it in the front yard with a hammer… I even gave them my car keys and was but to leave to my boyfriend house in the Uber I bought. But they forced me to stay and break up with him also I wasn’t allowed to go live on campus anymore. Now a year later my parents hate him and since I live in there house I’m not allowed to see him( we met one a week at my college to see each other secretly). They said I did this to myself and I always blame them…I’m I the problem?

We are going to visit family over Memorial Day weekend- we have an almost 9 month old and our family all live 4-5 hours away. My siblings came to visit for my birthday in March (my parents passed from cancer in 2020) but my in laws haven’t seen the baby since Christmas and this will be the first time they’ll see her unmasked (they refused to get flu shot/TDAP/Covid vaccine). They’re not my favorite people but I am excited to see my family.
DH video calls with them every Sunday and this past Sunday MIL informs us that her current job (a fundie religious private school that is closing down due to low enrollment) is throwing an open house for her to celebrate almost 40 years of teaching- she can’t retire because they don’t have the $$ and FIL was forced into retirement due to his ongoing cancer treatment. I digress- she’s worked the job a long time so the least they could do is celebrate her considering the poor pay and the fact that she’s in her 60’s and had to job search. When is this celebration? The weekend after Memorial Day weekend.
Husband of course feels obligated to go. We are both frustrated at the situation because we are a one car household so if he goes it’s only going to be for the day and I’ll be home with the baby. We discussed him taking the baby and driving and spending the night with them. Which would have been an easy fix except one of my oldest friends will be around that same weekend and wanted to meet the baby (an airline pilot who lives in another state so his schedule means I rarely see him). And I am not going to change my plans with my friend for them last minute.
You would think if you’re throwing a party to honor someone you’d let them pick the date…we don’t know if they ran it by MIL and she approved or they just decided themselves and she’s too meek to say anything. I’m more frustrated at the situation but I’m fairly sure MIL didn’t think to run the date by us but then excitedly tells us about it and hopes baby can make it. We are leaning towards husband just going for the day because baby will have spent enough time in the car Memorial Day weekend and I’m not putting her through it again just so grandma can show her off without considering us.

I'll try to just include the important stuff, but I feel like at this point our issues are so compounded that I want to give a full scope of things.
Me (23M) and my bf (22M) have been together for almost a year and a half. It's been... a lot from the jump. I had just gotten out of two back to back abusive relationships, and this is his first relationship. We were best friends for a bit and I had always thought he was straight, but had a lowkey crush on him. He only told me his feelings after he accidentally came over earlier than he was supposed to and overheard me hooking up with a friend (who I'll call Sam). I want to preface by saying me and Sam agreed before and after that the hookup meant nothing, for him it was a rebound while he was home for college and getting over his Big Ex and for me it was an unhealthy way to deal with being raped by my ex a couple weeks prior. The hookup happened once. Me and Sam never so much as flirted with each other in all the years of knowing each other. My Bf knew about the assault (he grew up with my ex/abuser), and obviously knew about the hookup. He still wanted to get together so I said sure.
Off the bat he wanted me to block Sam. I've known Sam since 6th grade, much longer than I've known my bf, and I was sort of put off by the request but after getting out of two back to back abusive relationships and being assaulted, I didn't feel comfortable to really put my foot down and didn't want to cause issues. So I did. For the next year Sam was blocked, and me and bf had other issues. He was unemployed almost the entire time with no motivation to do applications, there was a point where I was either doing applications for him (where he would be reading over my shoulder the whole time making it take 3x as long) or bribing him by saying I'd only cover his beer if he put in at least one or two applications that day. He has diagnosed - but very obvious - OCD and he was putting me in the position of needing to offer him constant reassurance (if I didn't get up to check if the door was locked, he would pout and keep me up, I needed to stop everything and watch him feed the cats, do chores, lock the door, etc or else he wouldn't do it). He refused to get therapy despite me offering to do all the work of finding a therapist and setting up the appointment, or even explicitly telling him that I don't feel comfortable being in a relationship with someone who won't go to therapy. He also tends to be weirdly controlling? Like he won't be explicitly controlling, but he'll get really depressed or even angry if I so much as mention plans with other friends that don't include him - but when he is included he just complains about being left out and always wants to leave early. If I want to work on homework or do a hobby, he gets depressed that I don't want to spend time with him. If I ask him to go back to his house (he never officially moved in. I don't want him to move in. He just WON'T LEAVE) then he says I don't care about him or even that I'm abusive. He doesn't like the job I do, he doesn't want me to pursue the career I want, and he doesn't want me to travel as it's a waste of money but traveling alone isn't an option since that means I don't care for him.
There's also other things, like his insecurity or rumination on negativity ruling his life and affecting me. He wants me to spend ALL of my time with him. I'm a full time student and I work full time and support myself, while he pays no bills and does not go to school or have and desire to. I feel like he puts me in a position of being his sole support person, and guilt trips me if I don't want to spend literal hours a day reassuring or cuddling him. He will stay at my house and not leave, or throw a fit if I ask him to leave, or just wear me down so much that I feel like I have to say he can stay. I live in 140sq ft shed conversion that I worked really hard for after being homeless. It's a tiny space that I can't get any alone time in.
Lately one big issue has been coming up. He thinks I cheated. Basically, in January, I reached out to Sam to apologize for ghosting and the terms we left off on. My bf knew I was sending that message and he was okay with it. I didn't expect a reply from Sam. However a couple weeks later, he did reply. I did not tell my bf this. At this point I was really frustrated with my bf and considering breaking up due to his lack of motivation and controlling tendencies. I was working up the courage, and I confided this in Sam as he had no connection to the situation and I wanted to know if I was truly being as abusive and awful as my bf has been saying. Me and Sam kept in contact until March. The conversations were pretty surface level. We addressed the hookup and both agreed it meant nothing and there's nothing there. He talked to me about his crush and asked for advice, I asked for advice on my situation and he stayed pretty neutral. At that point I just appreciated having a normal friend. Someone I didn't have to hold their hand through their mental health issues, or bribe to get a job, or constantly reassure. There was no flirting, no sexting, no fucking. Nothing. But I knew it felt wrong to hide the friendship, and I know that was on me for fucking up. I was scared to tell my bf for fear of his reaction - both due to the way he tends to overreact about other things, and how my abusive exes isolated me from friends in the past.
So I told my bf, and I prepared to break up with him if his reaction was as bad as I anticipated. It was pretty bad, yelling and name calling etc. But he wanted to stay together. He cried and read a list of all the things he loves about me and promised to get a job and therapy and that he would give me alone time and everything. So I said I'd give it another shot.
He got into therapy after another 2-3 months of me begging him. He went to one session and never again. He got a job a month ago because I got him a job where I work (did the paperwork for him even). But he can't let it go about Sam. I ended up blocking him again a couple weeks after I told my bf because I couldn't handle him being super cold and moody every time I so much as checked the time on my phone. He was constantly asking where I was, why I didn't text him, I don't care about him as much as he cares about me, etc. He didn't get me the 2 months of space (not sleeping over for more than once or twice a week, not hanging out on nights I have homework). Last week he wanted me to recover the messages between me and Sam, so I did and he read them. There was nothing to see. I sent screenshots to my friends, hell even my mom, and everyone agrees that there's nothing there. But he's convinced that Sam was flirting with me heavy and I just let it happen, that I was planning on breaking up with him to be with Sam, all this shit. It's been a shitshow since. He keeps blowing up every couple of days saying I'm abusive and manipulative, that I don't deserve space because 'look what you did last time I gave you space'. He wanted to do couples therapy which I agreed to, and has been hounding me about it. When I asked when he's getting into individual therapy he says he will do it on his own time and that he refuses to be manipulated and coerced into it. When I say I'm too stressed to have another 4hr convo where we rehash everything and he berates me then I'm being cold and uncaring for forcing him to bottle it up and be alone. When I ask him repeatedly to go home he will ignore me and stay, or say its abuse that I'm kicking him to the curb, that I'm abandoning him in his darkest hour. He sniffs me when I come home from work and asks me why I smell like that (even though it's just the same deodorant and shampoo I've used for years). He made me give him my location and asks where I am.
Two days ago he wanted to text Sam from my phone to say "Should I tell him?" and try to like, catch me or something. He thinks I either fucked him or sexted him and deleted the texts. I told him at this point if I did cheat I would have just said that to get this over with. But I said fine, send the text BUT I don't want to touch the topic again until we get into therapy together and I want you to go home and that's that. He accused me of conspiring with Sam to get him to lie, told me 'fuck you, I'm done, we're breaking up'. I said 'okay let me go get your clothes out of the wash'. Then I come back and he yells about how fucked up I am, how much of a hoe and a cheater I am, that I'm a narcissist and a liar. Then he starts crying about me abandoning him and how unfair I am. He alludes to being suicidal and talks about how he wants to work on things. He begs me to hug him and says everything is better when we hug. I ended up letting him stay because I frankly I was scared about him being suicidal, and I was scared about what he said about me being abusive. I really don't want to be.
But the thing is I really want him out. I don't want him to live here. He says because he got a job, and he's working on his OCD himself, he cleans and helps buy groceries, he makes things nice for when I get off work, that he's doing enough. He said 'at least I don't assault you like your exes'. Yesterday he bought me a $200 bass I really wanted, and he was really nice all day. He was pretty nice today to and had a lot of self restraint when asking me if I'm at a place to talk about something and ended up dropping it since I seemed stressed. But my summer classes are starting in 3 days. I got low grades last semester because I had to choose between him and homework and he won since I would rather have peace than constant stress. I don't think I can focus on school around him. I wasted my short summer break on this stupid drama that shouldn't even be drama. He made me leave my moms really important graduation because he wanted to go home even though we were supposed to stay and hang out. I dread coming home from work. I dread him coming home from work. I'm happier when he's not around. When things are good, they're good! But at this point it feels fake because it's only calm for so many days until he breaks down about how he cant keep shoving his feelings down just for me. I feel suffocated. I feel like I have to support this person that doesn't even support me. I'm scared to break it off or tell him to go because he calls me awful things and says I'm abusive. I feel crazy. I really don't think I'm abusive. But maybe I am?? So Reddit: Am I the asshole if I kick him out? If not, HOW do I do it??

She hit me because I argued back with her. I’m a male and I feel crazy for going to a DV shelter. But I might have nowhere else to go.
I am not sure if going to a DV shelter will help me and my life. My daughter is 1 and months away is a lot. I have nowhere to go but if I go then I cannot contact her or use my phone for a while. I am worried it’s the wrong choice but it’s hard seeing alternatives. I can’t bring myself to call my family because I don’t talk to them. No contact.
I’m isolated and feel like it’s better to leave. At the same time that I’m sick of feeling terrible I want to apologize more and try to make it work.
I know she is controlling. Name calls. Belittles me and says I should just take it because I owe her because she has supported me for long enough.
There’s just so much to figure out and I have no one to talk to. I’m trying to find a counselor or therapist but it takes time.

I 24F took in my younger sister 17F in October. She had texted me during school that day saying she didn’t feel safe, when she got home she texted me our code word. I left work as soon as I could and made a lame excuse to go over to my family’s home. My parents 41F and 57M were standoffish so I stuck to my lame excuse and distracted them. My sister ran to my truck and ducked down. I left and around the corner we self reported her runaway to the proper authorities. We reported to CPS everything that happened and led up to that day and have worked with the system since including the sheriffs office and detectives. I won’t say what exactly we went through but our dad has been arrested on 11 charges, 2 of which are capital crimes. Through all of this she has lived with me and my husband 24M in our home we purchased just a month before she ran. We’re both suffering PTSD and depression from everything that happened and she has been seeing a therapist. Unfortunately my sister and I present very differently. I took the quiet way out of that house so I could still have access to my sisters when I moved out, my sister has fought every step of the way since leaving for justice. It’s admirable and I don’t want to sound like I don’t love her and understand how hard all of this is, but my sister has been rude to my husband and I, condescending about my education, complaining we’re never home when we go to work, picking fights with me, complaining we can’t afford to buy her a car, etc. Needless to say it makes it feel like everything we do is not enough and never will be and has led to changes in how we want to handle her turning 18 in 3 months. My husband and I started working on a rental contract to give her and ourselves protection when she turns 18. She can rent her room and bathroom for $350 a month with all basic groceries, utilities, washedryer and all the supplies, kitchen and all the supplies, and streaming services included. There are rules that are basically keep your spaces clean, keep the common spaces clean, respect all members of the household, let us know in advance if you’re having company over and give us extra time if you’ll be having company over and hosting in common areas so we can make sure we don’t have plans overlapping. We did decide that for disrespecting the rules or us there would be a financial penalty after a certain amount of times a month of failing to do these things because we currently have no recourse for her consistently fighting with me until I cry, leaving messes in the kitchen I get to clean up, and just generally not respecting our home. There are clauses to have those penalties removed and added in for her protection because it’s meant to protect everyone if any arguments or issues come up. My husband, being frustrated after 8 months of her purposefully upsetting me or starting fights then asking us for things and guilting us for them not being done immediately because we need to work to pay bills, wants to drop this in front of her when she turns 18 and give her two options: sign the contract and stay with us or find somewhere else to live and provide us with a lease by the end of August (her birthday is early in the month). I felt that was unfair to drop with no warning so I gave her a heads up about it so she wouldn’t be startled when the time came. After talking with her therapist, she’s decided we’re a**holes for not just supporting her (emotionally and financially) after she turned 18. I’m on the fence and frustrated. So AITA for asking my sister to sign a rent contract or move out after she turns 18? P.S. my husband has been very patient with her and the first few months just brushed everything off. He’s only to this point because there’s been no improvement whatsoever and she has been apathetic to everyone and has even ridiculed me for crying or being at all emotional.

In this term,as a Asian student I have received the mark terrible enough to my mom will adopt a new kid.(“We are in world top ten universities,you still good.”said by my white friend.As Asian we don’t do that way,either you are good enough to make the 90% of people said “well”,or go home.Fight to be top is the nature,since we have nothing to lose.)
Especially ,for the international strategy course,which I took as elective module.The irony here is the reason why I take ,I though I would be good at this one .
After received the mark ,I was depressed and want to cry.(yes,I am weak.:)But I still have the exams to prepare,I told myself hold the anger and tear to express after the exam .
After exam ,I want to do an official appeal about the international strategy assignment.So I reach out with the director of this course.I was pissed out ,bcs I thought some comments ignored the thinking in my work,and they are only judging by how I present.(which have been negative influenced by my depression).All those excuse saved my self-esteem.
However after our meeting,I stop thinking this way.Yes ,the director is right,my job is bad .I always expect the reader can link the points and evidences without my analysis.Except that,I really need to change my cognitive model.I was to using web model to learn knowledge .（going to discuss in next post.)
There is a thing called first principle in cognitive model,which is the way he want to see when we are analysis,like to link the analysis with our primary goal. For example,if we try to solve how car can run fast ,then think about what is the fundamental element make car run,and what is the fundamental element affect the efficiency.
Now,I accept I am sack at English writing and the deep learning.But I am going to change ,this is the first step-random post something in English .As long as I am moving and trying,still not flailed.I also tried to read more English books by myself instead of mother language vision.)
(Anyway,I really glad no one know me here.My fragile self-esteem always make me want to hide and give up.Like If I did not try hard,when I fail I still not a loser.I read one interview of Elon said try 10 times first. Ok then let’s try,I will be good in the future.) Thx for reading,left your comment tell me what you think. (Aaaa ,share point is really scare .)

I just really need somewhere to vent. Idk if you’d call it hatred, but it’s definitely content and resentment and anger. I am the oldest and I grew up so emotionally neglected. The eldest daughter rage is a thing for sure. She always fucking NEEDS something or WANTS something from me and just never leaves me the fuck alone. I feel so at peace when she is gone and just this sense of anger and annoyance when she returns home after being gone for an extended period of time. She does what she wants regardless of how anyone else feels, and while she isn’t necessarily terrible, her very existence bothers me. I’ve said before that I want to love her. But I don’t. I don’t love her and barely like her at times. I mean I’m fond of her at times and laugh with her at times but most time I don’t want her around. I don’t think it’s normal to feel this way or maybe it is idk. I’ve spoken to some friends before about my resentment towards her from being so protected in life while I had no one and I’m pretty sure that’s where a big part of that resentment comes from. She can say no about shit while I was always made to feel like a bad person for standing up for myself. I hate that shit and it enraged me when she asks me for shit. Like I just want her to leave me alone. She can do hair for herself and if she can’t then oh fucking well. If she doesn’t have something then she just won’t fucking have it. She has helped me in the past and I’ve helped her. Ik I shouldn’t consider it an eye for an eye but I do, and therefore believe she shouldn’t need me for shit else. She can figure it out on her own. I know this way of thinking isn’t healthy and I’ve talked at length about my resentment towards her and my parents in therapy but I haven’t seen my therapist in almost a year. I’m hoping to get back to it because right now I am at home and am working on saving to leave but despite my efforts to change and be the person I want to be I am filled with this almost black anger and pure disgust and contempt that only flairs it’s ugly head when she, my mother or father engage with me. I should be excited to see her and her most of the time I have to make sure my face and tone never gives off how aggravated I am to see her even when she wants to see me. Sigh. I just needed to vent for a bit. And if anyone has ever gone through this with a sibling and managed to be friends with their sibling(s) later down the line I’d love any advice. Therapy is a too priority right now but I don’t have the money for it yet so I’m just trying to find a way to ease these ugly/uncomfortable emotions until I can get professional help and eventually move out/away.

I 28F need advice from all of the internet. This is my first post so please don’t eat me alive.
My ex 33M and I broke up in January and now in May we can’t decide if we want to date or not. (Engaged for one month) just broke up shy of 2 years
I no longer live with him and for the past 4-5 months, I just feel he is sketchy and it’s very obvious anything is justified why he can never fully show up for what I ask of him.
I’m at parents, surrounded in a town with anyone in my highschool where no one is my friend. I lost all my close friends during this relationship, but it was also kind of a blessing because those people were just drinking friends, they did not actually care about me, they really just enjoyed how I showed up for them.
Anyways I just feel so alone in my life, I’m an only child so I don’t know what it feels like to have that bond with a sibling. My family all posses really negative toxic traits. They don’t do any healing work to improve themselves.
I don’t receive recognition at my job, I feel like anytime I express how I feel people instantly invalidate me and I feel i have to give up what I want, I have no friends to discuss anything with or hangout with.
I crave to have connection, but there had to be depth, I cared deeply and see so much potential in others, I really want try to be what I wish I had in my life. ( I promise all this background information is needed for my question)
I just got my tooth pulled and yesterday my Ex said that today he would drive the hour to spend some time and take me for a lil treat. Day of he texts me saying how he might have to bring his gma or the second option being back by dinner to be able to bring her food. He does have to take care of her, and we have spent a lot of time doing things with her. It was already like 12:30 when he’s saying all this and she likes to eat at 5 so 1:30-4 because it’s An hour drive. I just felt like he shouldn’t come and it ruined how excited I was because it felt like yesterday he really was trying to show me he wanted this to work and then the day of complaining about it and it just didn’t feel like he was trying to do something geniune for me. It has been months of me not feeling like a priority.
He got very upset and told me that I’m selfish and jealous of his grandmother. I’m nuts. And ended in us blocking each other.
Was I wrong for telling him not to come? Am I selfish ?

My remaining years are few and my body is weak, yet my memories are still sharp, so I shall share a tale I’ve long kept secret. I no longer wish to take it with me to the grave. I once feared that others might be drawn to this horrible experience of mine, like those who wander too close to the edges of a roaring tornado, only to be consumed and mangled beyond recognition. But I’ve come to realize that it was naive to think this way. Though some may not heed a tornado's warning, that’s no reason not to sound the alarm. And so, I tell this story with that purpose in mind.
Consider this the gravest of warnings to stay away from Stonemoor Manor.
In the year of 1953, I was but a young man, though already busy with the responsibilities of a career and a family. Despite my tender age, I had already dabbled in various trades, for I was a restless spirit, never one to settle. From labor to intellect, I had tried my hand at it all. With equal prowess in both craft and wit, I found my true calling in a profession that demanded both: veterinary medicine.
Life in Ireland was tough in those times. Many young families were heading off for better opportunities overseas. Though I was hesitant at first, myself and the wife decided we’d eventually do the same for our daughter’s sake. But I wasn’t about to take them to a new land empty-handed, so we agreed to stay another year in Ireland while I put away some coin. To stretch our savings as far as they would go, we chose to see out our final year in a rural spot where the cost of living was kinder on the pocket.
With but a year's worth of experience as a vet under my belt, I had yet to earn myself a reputation worth speaking of, nor had I much acquaintance with the locals in the village we'd chosen as our temporary home. Still, I held firm in the skills I possessed, my eagerness to learn, and my belief that this countryside community of farms and fields would provide ample chances to prove myself. To put it plainly, I was brimming with confidence, some might even call it cockiness. I suppose it was a mixture of that and desperation which brought me to Stonemoor Manor.
As the days stretched into months, I found myself haunting the local pub like a ghost, a familiar face among the regulars. My confidence was dwindling with the lack of work. It seemed like everyone in that village had the healthiest animals in all of Ireland, maybe even beyond. What a cruel twist, their blessed lives mocking my own struggles.
One evening, in my drunken stupor, I hadn’t noticed at first the gaunt figure come into the pub and saunter over to the shadowed corner where I was drowning my sorrows. It wasn’t until he spoke that I saw him.
“Are you the veterinarian?” He asked.
I raised my head and steadied my blurred gaze on the face of a man whose sunken features made him look more shadow than flesh. For a moment, I even thought I was looking at a skeleton.
“Aye, that’d be me.”
“They seek your presence at Stonemoor Manor.”
“And what’s the reason for that?”
“The Master’s horse has taken ill.”
“And what does this ‘master’ go by?”
The man glared in silence, then in a tone tinged with irritation and raised volume, declared, "His name is Alistair Stonemoor."
In an instant, the chatter in the pub fell silent, and every gaze turned toward our shadowed corner.
Under the weight of the pub's collective gaze, the man squirmed uncomfortably, his voice lowering as he muttered, "It matters not. You’ll be well rewarded for your troubles."
Past the man, the bartender shook his head in disapproval, fixing me with a stern glare, and silently mouthed the word, "no."
Despite the bartender's cautionary glance, fueled by youth, folly, and a healthy dose of drink, I brushed aside his advice and turned to the man, blurting out, "How much is this Master Stonemoor offering?"
The man leaned closer, his face illuminated by the flickering candlelight, revealing a gaunt, pallid countenance and foggy eyes. He looked every bit of his seventy years or more. "Sufficient to settle comfortably upon reaching the shores of America," he murmured.
In that moment, it would have been prudent to heed the warning signaled by the hairs standing on end at the nape of my neck. When your instincts scream "leave," it's best to listen. But the allure of a swift resolution to my troubles clouded my judgment. The prospect of a better life sooner than expected was too tempting to resist. So, I rose from my seat and addressed the man, "I'll go fetch me things.”
I made the decision I believed was best for my family.
God rest their souls.
I kept from my lovely Mary the weight the Stonemoor name carried in the pub. She'd have put a stop to my leaving in an instant. Instead, I spun a tale of a wealthy gent in need of my skills, assuring her I'd be back when the job was done. With our wee Annie already tucked in for the night, I kissed my wife goodbye, gathered my tools, and slipped into the back of a sleek black sedan, driven by the mysterious man with eyes like fog, seemingly undeterred by their cloudy gaze.
I leaned in and murmured, "Didn't quite catch your name, sorry.”
“Never said it.”
“Ah, right. What is it, then?”
“Fergus.”
“Pleasure, Fergus. I’m Liam.”
“I know.”
“Right. The ad. You’ve seen me ad.”
With no response from Fergus, I pressed on, asking, "How far is Stonemoor Manor from here?"
“About a half hour drive.”
What ensued was a half-hour journey enveloped in silence, traversing through the village and onto a dirt path winding through a dense, shadowy forest. Eventually, we arrived at an iron gate, which swung open onto a secluded road. Despite my keen observation, I couldn't discern who operated the gate, nor who secured it shut behind us. Ten minutes further along this secluded path, the woods parted, revealing the grandeur of Stonemoor Manor for the first time.
It bore a striking resemblance to a castle, its exterior fashioned from grey stone adorned with towers and crenellations, save for the central portion, which appeared to be of Victorian design. Judging by the numerous windows, the manor rose at least four stories high, not accounting for any underground levels.
The manor lay bathed solely in the moon's glow, devoid of any external illumination. Among the multitude of windows, only one emitted light: a solitary glimmer from a small window perched atop one of the corner towers.
Fergus brought the car to a halt, then stepped out and opened my door. With a nod, he gestured towards the manor and uttered, "Master Stonemoor awaits you within."
"Up there, is he?” I acknowledged, stepping out of the vehicle and casting a nod towards the illuminated window.
Ignoring my question, Fergus closed the door firmly. "Come along," he directed, leading the way towards the looming manor.
We climbed stone steps to confront a grand iron door, effortlessly opened by old Fergus. He gestured for me to enter before closing the door with a heavy thud that echoed through the foyer. Cast only in the moon's silver light, the room revealed itself in fragments, with stone stairs disappearing into the shadows ahead. Fergus had vanished from sight, leaving me to navigate the dimness alone.
I called out for Fergus, but my voice echoed unanswered, stirring a growing sense of unease. Doubt crept in, whispering of traps and deceit. With cautious steps, I retreated towards the door, its cool iron offering a sense of security. Fumbling in the darkness, my heart quickened with each passing moment, panic threatening to overwhelm me. Just as my trembling hand found the handle, the room burst into light.
“Departing so soon, are we?”
A new voice pierced the silence, resonating with youth and vigor unlike Fergus's. Swiveling around, my eyes met those of a tall, middle-aged man clad in a sleek black three-piece suit, accented by a bold red tie. With raven-black hair framing his face and piercing blue eyes, he commanded the landing of the steps, which diverged to his left and right.
“Ah, sorry now. I seemed to have gone and misplaced Fergus,” I chuckled sheepishly. “Thought he might’ve been locked out. I take it you’re Mister Stonemoor?”
"Please, call me Alistair," he replied with a nod. "And you must be Doctor Kerrigan?"
"Aye... Liam, that's me name," I stammered. "Only the creatures call me doctor."
I couldn't tell if the jest garnered even a smirk, for Alistair remained rooted to the spot at the top of the stairs, a considerable distance away.
"Anyhow," I persisted, "I understand there's a sick horse in need of attention?"
"Are you drunk, Doctor?" Alistair's tone was pointed, his gaze piercing.
Alistair's question caught me off guard, leaving me momentarily speechless, akin to a child caught in mischief. Yet, I had a feeling of innocence; after all, it was Fergus who had recruited me from the pub.
“I’ve had a few pints this evening.”
“I can smell it on you.”
“That is truly impressive.”
“There is nothing impressive about it, Doctor Kerrigan.”
“Well, I didn’t go swimming in it, did I?”
“I do not know and I find your sarcasm unwelcome. Fergus will escort you to a chamber, and you shall begin attending to my horse at daybreak."
“Hold on now, I'm sorry for me behavior, but I can't be staying the night. I've got a family to get back to. And anyhow, shouldn't this horse be needing emergency treatment?"
Alistair turned on his heel and ascended the staircase to his right. "Treatment can wait until you've sobered up," he declared, his tone leaving no room for argument.
"I'm plenty sober!" I hollered after him as he vanished up the stairs. "Me hands are steady as a rock!" My protest echoed through the empty foyer, but Alistair had already disappeared from sight.
Fergus emerged from the shadows of a nearby hallway, causing me to startle. "I will show you to your room.”
“You’re a right sly one, Fergus. Anyway, I can’t be sticking around for the night.”
“Master intends to further compensate you for your time.”
“And if I refuse?”
“Then I shall return you to your burdens.”
With my jaw clenched and eyes shut tight, I drew in a deep breath. For a fleeting moment, a vision danced in my mind's eye: my little Annie, her smile radiant as she pointed towards Lady Liberty. So precious she was, my heart ached with longing for her to have a better life.
"Fine," I relented, opening my eyes. "Show me to the room."
As I awoke, it was not to the gentle glow of morning light, but to the harsh brightness of noon. Jumping from the bed, I checked my watch, confirming my fears. With urgency, I slipped on my shoes, grabbed my bag, and hastened out of the bedroom. Stepping into the hallway, I was disoriented, with no recollection of its layout from the night before. Rows of closed doors lined the corridor, and I began to try each one in turn. Pushing and pulling, I soon realized that every door was locked. Surely, not every room warranted such security, I pondered, my frustration growing with each failed attempt.
As I ventured down the hall and finally arrived at the imposing stone staircase, the resounding clicks of each door unlocking in unison sent shivers down my spine. Goosebumps prickled across my skin, and I hastened my descent down the stairs, my heart pounding in my chest. Just as I reached the bottom, I came to an abrupt stop, narrowly avoiding a collision with the ghastly figure of Fergus.
“Sleep well?” He asked.
“Jesus, Fergus! It’s noon! Has the horse given up the ghost yet? And, I haven’t a clue what’s happening upstairs, but…”
“Master Stonemoor awaits your presence in the stables.”
I looked at Fergus a moment, wondering if he’d heard a word I’d said, then relented, “Okay, then. Can I use a phone first?”
“There’s no phone on this property.”
“No phone? That’s a bit old-fashioned, isn’t it? I need to let me wife know where I am.”
“I will send word.”
“Quickly, then. Just let her know not to be worrying about me. I’ll be back once the job is done.”
Fergus nodded in acknowledgement before guiding me towards the stables. In the light of day, the grandeur of Stonemoor Manor became even more apparent. It truly was a colossal structure, dominating the landscape with its impressive presence.
The stables were nearly empty, save for one stall at the far end where I found Alistair tending to a black thoroughbred, sprawled on straw, barely clinging to consciousness.
"She's a beauty, isn't she?" Alistair remarked, not lifting his gaze from her.
"Aye, but she's in a bad way."
Alistair nodded solemnly. "She's been like this for some time.”
"You should've woke me.”
"Wouldn't have changed a thing." Alistair paused in his brushing of the horse’s mane and rested his hand upon her flank, following the rhythm of her strained breaths.
"Isn't it me duty to tend to her?"
Alistair withdrew his hand and straightened up, his eyes bluer than ever. "No, it's not." And just then, the horse's breathing stopped. "Come along, Doctor."
Alistair guided me through the grand house, down echoing halls, and into a room adorned with portraits aplenty. He paused in the center of the room and asked, "Any of these faces look familiar?" I scoured the walls until I stumbled upon a particular painting, a sight that nearly shook me to the core. In that frame, a woman and a young lass gazed back at me, bearing an eerie resemblance to my own Mary and our sweet Annie.
My blood boiled with fury, convinced that this portrait depicted my own wife and daughter. Suspicion gnawed at me, and I eyed Alistair with distrust, wondering if he was some sort of obsessed deviant. "Out with it," I demanded, my voice sharp with anger.
“No need to fret, Doctor. This painting predates your girls by quite a stretch."
"I'm not taking it, they're too alike for comfort.”
"I’m just as baffled as yourself," Alistair conceded, his words laced with sadness. "The girls in the painting are my dear wife and daughter. Both passed away some time ago."
I stood silent for a moment, then spoke softly, "I'm sorry. I didn't realize." My gaze returned to the portraits before scanning the room again, my eyes catching on something odd. "Don't you have any photographs of them?"
Alistair let out a weary sigh and turned to me. "I'm afraid not," he confessed. "They passed before photographs were even a notion."
A puzzled chuckle broke from my lips. "Surely not. Cameras have been about for a hundred years," I countered, shaking my head in disbelief.
Alistair fixed me with a steady gaze, betraying no hint of doubt or error. "So it be," he affirmed with quiet certainty.
Apart from Alistair's piercing blue eyes, other features seemed to have taken on a newfound radiance. His skin possessed a youthful glow, his hair appeared fuller, and his jawline more defined. Alistair, it seemed, had undergone a remarkable rejuvenation, growing younger right before my eyes.
“Pardon me asking, but in which year were you born, Mister Stonemoor?”
Alistair smirked and made his way to a sizable wooden desk and lowered himself onto a chair. "Are you a man of faith, Doctor Kerrigan?”
Assuming this to be a roundabout approach, I responded, "Aye, I've a healthy fear of the Almighty."
Alistair rummaged through a drawer and withdrew a hefty leather-bound tome, causing a cloud of dust to rise as he placed it upon his desk. Flipping it open, he motioned for me to approach. Amongst the sea of words, atop the first page, was a title:
The Knights Templar.
What Alistair divulged to me was a tale so fantastical, it surpassed any yarn I'd ever heard spun. He claimed to have once been among the legendary Knights Templar, embroiled in the Crusades and journeying across continents in pursuit of sacred relics and hidden truths.
But as history tells, the Templars met a grim fate, condemned by their own church and hunted to extinction. Yet, Alistair was no mere casualty of that bloody chapter. He was a survivor, lurking in the very woods where Stonemoor Manor now stood, clutching to the shadows with a treasure in hand.
Amongst the spoils of his clandestine escapades was a fabled emerald tablet, etched with secrets believed to bridge the mortal realm with the divine. Alistair, having purloined the tablet and sought refuge in the forest, claimed to have communed with the Almighty himself. And in that sacred dialogue, he made a plea, and it was granted.
Thus, his years became as boundless as his desires.
As his narrative drew to a close, Alistair closed the book and beckoned me to follow him back to the stables. Stunned into silence after what I’d just heard, I trailed behind him as we retraced our steps to the very spot where we had witnessed the horse's demise. And once we arrived, still, my tongue lay dormant as I beheld the miraculous sight before me: the once lifeless creature now stood vibrant and strong.
Finally, a solitary word escaped my lips, a gasp of incredulity as I uttered, "How?"
"The Lord bestowed upon me a gift," Alistair confessed, his voice weighted with solemnity. "But it came at a cost. In death, I find life. With each soul I take, I grow younger."
The transformation in Alistair's appearance now made sense, yet it did little to quell my lingering doubts about the resurrection of the horse. "But why is the horse alive, then?" I pressed, seeking further clarification.
In response, Alistair simply glanced past me, nodding toward a figure looming in the shadows. Turning, my eyes fell upon Fergus, his form now even more weathered, his countenance more gaunt and gray. He looked to have aged another decade.
Alistair spoke as I stood in awe, elucidating, "With death, I am rejuvenated, yet with life, Fergus withers further. I take and I gain, while he gives and he loses. Our blessing is also our curse.”
Fergus looked on with weary eyes and sagging shoulders. "There was a portrait earlier that escaped your notice, Doctor," Alistair interjected. "It was the portrait of my son... Fergus Stonemoor."
To be continued…

I was told yesterday by my bosses that this summer, I am expected to continue providing support for a child I work with who has different needs. I am also supposed to be someone who his aide can apparently consult if she needs support. I have been working with this child for nearly a year now, typically for 3 hours a day at most. For the last two months, I have been told that the child was supposed to be in a different location for summer, though I understand that a recent meeting with the child’s parents is part of the reason behind the change.
I am someone who struggles quite a bit with change, and this threw me off. I was also told that I will be expected to change this child’s diaper (child is 4 and not potty trained, almost 4 1/2 I think. The child tends to have blowouts, like feces running down their legs, which is why this newfound information threw me off.) The child tends to run away from the group and although I am young, I suspect that over summer trying to help them stay with the group (they are nonverbal and don’t tend to come back or respond if asked to remain with the group) will be difficult, as you’ll sometimes have to run over and go get them. I feel as though I don’t truly have enough experience working with this child to provide them with the support I will likely be expected to provide for them in the afternoons. I did sort of communicate this to my employers and suggested I’ll likely be asking a lot of questions and will communicate if I need the support. But I feel like that sounds like a lot of responsibility. I will make $18/hr.
I also admittedly feel as though I perhaps will not be paid enough to handle said responsibilities. I make $17 an hr and start making $18 an hr this summer, will be working full time (7 hours daily, until college courses resume in mid August.) Last month, I was told I’d be receiving this dollar pay increase. I started as a sub on more or less the first day of August 2023, and became an assistant teacher in January 2024. I was initially satisfied with the 1-dollar pay increase, but what I was told about my summer responsibilities in regards to this child have made me wonder if I should request a little more ($19 an hour or $20 an hour.) I will also be expected to help out a different teacher with our group of kids in the mornings, what I was hearing all sounds like a lot for a teaching assistant. I’m holding back on it, though. I’m a young adult with no college degree (yet.)
My coworkers who I checked in with today seemed to agree that requesting $20 an hour is reasonable. At my evaluation last month I was told I’ll be making a dollar more. I did send them a text mentioning, basically, that I think a greater pay increase is reasonable and would like to meet to discuss it before the second week of June. I know my coworkers are paid more than me.
View Poll

21st: Scot Pollard (Kaoh Rong - 8th)

NBA REP IN ENDGAME LMFAOOOO
u/SMC0629:
It’s insane how great of a villain Scot is especially as deep into the show Kaoh Rong is, but he really is. Scot is one of the most petty and selfish people to be on the show, and it’s glorious. At the same time, you find yourself rooting for him every once in a while, there’s a lot of depth that goes into his character. I think he’s so deserving of endgame, and I couldn’t be happier he made it.
~
u/DryBonesKing:
The way my mouth dropped when Zan approached me for an Endgame deal that included Scot Pollard of all people. Like, based doesn’t even do the feeling justice when I described how hyped I felt about it. I love Scot and I think he has such a unique presence that I’m not sure if Survivor will ever truly replicate, especially as the show tries to carry itself as a more family friendly experience. But Scot is just so naturally intimidating and terrifying, and the scene of him dousing the fire in the middle of the day just to fuck with the tribe around him, might be one of the coldest scenes I have ever seen on Survivor.
The combined impact both he and Kyle Jason (who I actually have ranked back-to-back with him in my personal rankings) is just truly something as they feel more like one of the most intimidating villain presences in the show’s history. And what really helps make them better is how they sorta piggy-back on each other. Scot adds more of a natural darkness to Jason that helps him feel even more “evil” than he probably is, while Jason has a way with words and “just enough” of a sympathetic angle in his edit that you can’t help but worry that he could be getting a winner’s edit, that the two actually feel like they could succeed. You don’t get that shit really ever in Survivor! You watch Pearl Islands and you know Fairplay’s gonna lose in the end. Philippines? Abi won’t win with her edit. Worlds Apart’s evil trio? Well thankfully not cause all three of them suck ass, but the edit definitely is giving it away they’re going to lose to Mike in the end. But Scot and Jason? I mean… shit… why are they editing Jason like this? Is… Are they going to win out?
And because of that, it makes their downfall feel even more impactful. It makes Tai saying “No” at Scot’s boot one of the best moments of all time.
Scot’s fantastic. Amazing presence. Amazing character dynamic. One of the best relationships of all time with Jason. A great role in Tai’s character arc and brief descent to darkness. So many amazing qualities I can just gush about. I wouldn’t have in my own Endgame, but I am thrilled that someone wanted this to happen and I can’t wait to read the write-up justifying it!
Overall Rank – 52/821
~
u/Tommyroxs45:
Scot is such an awesome villain, yeah he’s a scumbag but who cares! We need someone who actively just doesn’t like anybody around him and he works so well with people like Tai and Aubry. You also can’t forget his bromance with Jason, just perfect, 2 villains who deserve to return!
~
u/Regnisyak1:
Scot is a partial reason why Kaoh Rong doesn’t land for me. I think his villainy gets to be a little too OTT to his character, and his ruthless nature toward Alecia just never sat right with me. Objectively, he is a great character, but I just personally think he is a lot and someone I would never have in Endgame without a deal, lol. But happy for Zan!
Personal Rank: 124/821. 8/10.
~
u/ninjedi1:
Scot is definitely one of the most unique villains on Survivor. You have the standard dickish villain role on the Brawn tribe, but then you do get to see his sweeter side with his bond with Tai when he gets swapped to another tribe. Then of course you have just absolute perfection at the merge with all the messy gameplay as well as beijng in one of my favorite alliances on the show with Tai and Jason, and then his blindside creating just the perfect Scot Sandwich, making it an absolute treat.
~~~~~
u/Zanthosus:
What makes a good Survivor villain? The answer to that question is going to be different for everybody. Some people may think that a great villain needs to be exceptionally charismatic, toe the line between cruelty and comedy, or have sympathetic motives or backstory to justify their means of reaching the end. All of these are valid things to look for, and they are all hallmarks of some of the best villains in the show’s history. But Scot falls into a different kind of category from most of these kinds of villains. He’s from an extinct subcategory of villains: the bully. It’s been said before that Scot is the last true villain of Survivor. And while I don’t agree with that statement completely, I do believe that he is the last bully we have seen, and will likely ever see again with how the show has edited and portrayed its characters. We’ll still have antagonists to root against, sure. Jonathan Young and Drew Basile are some recent examples that show Survivor can still give us some pretty good antagonistic forces. But when it comes to the cruel bully archetype, Scot is the last of that kind of character.
And it’s honestly bizarre to me in many ways how I find Scot an incredibly fascinating character, and end up loving to hate him. Especially when you compare him to so many of the other characters of this archetype we’ve seen over the years. Rocky Reid, NaOnka Mixon, and Corinne Kaplan are some of the more notable names that belong to this group. While these characters do undoubtedly have their own defenders, I’d be willing to bet that they’re much more disliked than liked across this community. And of course Scot has his own detractors, but it’s always seemed to me that there’s been much less of an outspoken force against him than others like him. And I’m no different. I have Scot in my own personal endgame, while many other bullies are sitting in my bottom 100 of all time. So, what gives? Well, while I can’t speak for everyone, for me at least it really comes down to one thing. It’s how the people that he and Jason pick on through the season consistently stand up to them and refuse to just lay down and take it. Even if it’s not immediately, almost everyone they target stands up for themselves in one way or another. It also helps that none of their bullying is steeped in any kind of bigotry or hatefulness. They value strength and are doing whatever they can do in their power to make it just a bit further into the game.
Even from the very start of the game, they immediately single out Darnell and Alecia as being the weak links on their tribe. I mentioned before in the Alecia writeup that To Tang is one of my favorite tribes of all time. Literally everyone has something to offer entertainment wise. And while Darnell is swiftly eliminated as the first boot, Alecia manages to cockroach her way a bit further. Scot is not shy about making his feelings for her known, being that she has no place on the Brawn tribe and that she’s holding them back in challenges and ruining tribe morale. And this rivalry is just so much fun to watch. Alecia’s constant scrappiness continually digging her hole deeper and deeper as one by one everyone on To Tang around her either is firmly against her or gets eliminated. It even gets tto the point where Scot, Jason, and Cydney team up together to make sure that Alecia doesn’t get an immunity idol, and it only just barely works, with Jason wrestling her for it before coming out as the victor. And after their subsequent challenge loss, Scot gives Alecia the opportunity to give up right then and there, and just forgo the inevitable decision at tribal council. And yet, Alecia fights to the bitter end. She’s adamant in not rolling over and giving up without every bit of fight she can muster. And despite what Scot and Jason may say in the moment, I’d be surprised if they didn’t respect her for that, especially considering how they too would have to cockroach along through the rest of the game.
I like to talk alot about the juxtaposition of characters. How different personalities can both complement and be at odds with each other. And I’m not sure there’s any better example of this than the relationship between Scot and Tai on this season. Because from the moment he’s swapped onto the new Gondol tribe, they get along pretty well and a genuine friendship seems to form. These episodes are especially interesting to me because this is the kindest light he’s shown in across the entire season. He’s just having fun and enjoying his time on a tribe that, despite continuing to lose, he’s seemingly happy in. The Anna vote is just a matter of fact decision. She’s the weakest link and is trying to stir things up, so she’s the one to go. The next vote though really does change the tune of the season, and of Scot’s attitude as a whole.
The Peter boot is interesting for Scot’s story. Not because of the episode itself, but because of the fallout that arises from it going into the merge. To him, Aubry’s indecisiveness and potential willingness to jump ship makes her someone that just cannot be trusted. And by the Nick vote, he’s pretty firmly on the bottom of the numbers. But just like Alecia wouldn’t simply roll over and give up, he’s not going to either. He’s going to hide the machete, dump water on the fire, and make everyone else’s lives miserable in the hopes of creating cracks. And the best part is that this isn’t a petty move for the sake of it. Just as Aubry herself says, “There’s no way Scot did this out of temper.” And his decision pays off. Debbie ostricizes herself from the group due to being riled up from Scot’s sabotages and gets sent home as a result. But all this time, despite Scot and Jason being on the bottom, they’ve still been working with Tai. They’re the devil on his shoulder to the angel that Aubry is being. And this all comes to a head in Scot’s boot episode.
At this point, Scot has not been shy about using dirty tactics if it means he can cockroach just that bit further and acquire just that little bit more power in the game. We of course see this in his actions around camp, but also in how he talks with others like Aubry, Cydney, Joe, and especially Tai. The interactions he has with Tai are particularly fascinating to me because at the end of the day, he’s trying to work with him. And he’s needing Tai to hold up his side of the super idol in order to keep him in the game. Even despite this, we see moment after moment of Scot talking down to Tai or quickly shooting down every one of his proposals. So from Tai’s perspective, he’s already setting aside his morals for the sake of the game by working with them, but then they’re belittling him despite needing his help. It, again, goes back to the point of Scot just being a bully. But with Alecia, she had no power. Her standing up to him affected nothing and simply didn’t matter other than prove her resolve. But with Tai, him standing up for himself is so much more impactful.
This tribal council is definitely up there for the greatest of all time, and that final “No” from Tai is an all time iconic moment in the show’s history. Not just for the moment in isolation, but moreso because of the buildup to it. Seeing Scot be the bad guy, then becoming friends with Tai, only to take advantage of Tai’s good nature too much, to the point that Tai feels his best option is to stand up to his bullies, and make a difference. He chooses to side with the heroes over the villains. One thing you should know about me is that I absolutely adore Tai and his story on this season. Tai 1.0 is easily top 10 of all time for me, and potentially a top 5 placement. And without Scot and his role on the season, Tai’s story wouldn’t have even half of the impact that it does. That is why I adore Scot. The season needed a villain like Scot, and without him and Jason, this season wouldn’t have a fraction of the life, soul, and complexity that it has. And that for me makes him more than worthy of a spot in endgame.
SMC0629: 13
DryBonesKing: 15
Zanthosus: 17
Tommyroxs45: 19
Regnisyak1: 24
DavidW1208: 23
ninjedi1: 18
Average Placement: 18.429
Total Points: 129
Standard Deviation: 3.994 (6th Lowest)

I just really need somewhere to vent. Idk if you’d call it hatred, but it’s definitely content and resentment and anger. I am the oldest and I grew up so emotionally neglected. The eldest daughter rage is a thing for sure. She always fucking NEEDS something or WANTS something from me and just never leaves me the fuck alone. I feel so at peace when she is gone and just this sense of anger and annoyance when she returns home after being gone for an extended period of time. She does what she wants regardless of how anyone else feels, and while she isn’t necessarily terrible, her very existence bothers me. I’ve said before that I want to love her. But I don’t. I don’t love her and barely like her at times. I mean I’m fond of her at times and laugh with her at times but most time I don’t want her around. I don’t think it’s normal to feel this way or maybe it is idk. I’ve spoken to some friends before about my resentment towards her from being so protected in life while I had no one and I’m pretty sure that’s where a big part of that resentment comes from. She can say no about shit while I was always made to feel like a bad person for standing up for myself. I hate that shit and it enraged me when she asks me for shit. Like I just want her to leave me alone. She can do hair for herself and if she can’t then oh fucking well. If she doesn’t have something then she just won’t fucking have it. She has helped me in the past and I’ve helped her. Ik I shouldn’t consider it an eye for an eye but I do, and therefore believe she shouldn’t need me for shit else. She can figure it out on her own. I know this way of thinking isn’t healthy and I’ve talked at length about my resentment towards her and my parents in therapy but I haven’t seen my therapist in almost a year. I’m hoping to get back to it because right now I am at home and am working on saving to leave but despite my efforts to change and be the person I want to be I am filled with this almost black anger and pure disgust and contempt that only flairs it’s ugly head when she, my mother or father engage with me. I should be excited to see her and her most of the time I have to make sure my face and tone never gives off how aggravated I am to see her even when she wants to see me. Sigh. I just needed to vent for a bit. And if anyone has ever gone through this with a sibling and managed to be friends with their sibling(s) later down the line I’d love any advice. Therapy is a too priority right now but I don’t have the money for it yet so I’m just trying to find a way to ease these ugly/uncomfortable emotions until I can get professional help and eventually move out/away.

A month ago my mother said “ your father called “ I responded okay with a laugh and left. Leaving me to wonder why he wants to talk to me after all these years. Last we spoke I was in middle school. I kid you not this man asked me “ do you want to marry daddy” I don’t remember my exact response only that after I got off the phone he was asking my mom “how are you raising her” implying I’m rude. Fast forward to this year after I get home from trying on wedding dress. My fiancé at the time stated my mother informed him my father was trying to contact me. I found this highly inappropriate because this was during a time that should of been about me.My mother asked me about it again and it made feel like I had to talk to him or something.
Finally talked to the dude and literally the worst decision. Should of listened to my gut. He came off like a creepy old man, he called me baby and referee to himself as daddy so many times I lost count. My husband doesn’t even call me baby that much. He starts the conversation off by asking “ why don’t you want to talk to daddy?”
He first called me when I was at work so I had to decline the call. After declining once he proceeded to call my phone back to back to the point I had to turn my phone completely off.
After that question I was already thrown off, then he states I’m his only daughter and he misses me. Mind you I know he has another daughter… he didn’t admit to it until I called it out. Idk why he would lie.
Then he proceeds to say he thought.. I was a white woman on Facebook and he’s been messaging her to the point where she responded and said “ I’m not your daughter”
This man thought him a black man, my mother a black woman made a white child…anyways he starts saying he wants to see me and if I want to see him. I literally said I already know what you look like and shut that conversation down.
Then he starts pressing me about why I don’t have Facebook… literally responded with “ I don’t use it because I don’t need it “ After he would say one thing, he proceeded to say “ daddy loves you baby “ Giving me the ick! I don’t even know this man.
The he basically ask me to file his paper work to come to America. Makes up a lie talking about some “ I’ll drive trucks to support myself “ then says I need to send my oldest sister money from time to time.…pathetic. I just ended up saying I have to go because wtf. Got off the phone and he sends
“ My love n my baby I thank God so much that we were able to talk pls let us keep communicating I love u n will always love u my baby I will keep praying 4 u in that state of conceivement Godis going to be with u till the time set by God bye 4 now love u.”
When I tell my mother all of this she says “ I think he was just excited to talk with you” He said he didn’t reach out for awhile because he didn’t have our number….
I told her exactly why I don’t want to speak with him. She then responds he’s your father you can’t do that. Literally I don’t care I’ve went 25 years just fine and now expecting a child of my own I can choose who is welcomed in my life.
This call made me feel traumatized at 25… like I’m dealing with a new trauma at 25! Im trying to figure out how to move on with my mental health after this. The call made feel like if this is really my biological father he’s perverted, may have touch me as a child and he has some type of mental impairment or on drugs.
TL;DR : father randomly wants to keep in contact after 25 years and comes off creepy, mother asked me again to speak with him and it’s disturbing my mental health.

AITA I moved in with my bf and his mother last summer due to some problems with my dad and ever since then he has withdrawn from me I struggled to keep my own bedroom clean at my parents house and I am doing better at his moms place but it still needs work I also struggle to clean up randomly around the house since I don’t eat a lot I come home from work and go straight to my room not even going into the kitchen of witch his brother (M14) makes a big mess I feel like I am only there to be a maid and clean up after him. I have also started to get badly depressed and I feel like I can’t voice my opinions to him without him getting mad. He is doing college so he is not home all the time only being back for a couple of weeks for the holidays or a vacation. The most recent fight we had was bc he said he needed my screwdriver set to help his friend with his new pc. I jokingly my said maaan and he snapped at me and said “I do not want your attitude all I needed from you was an ok and for you to bring me the F*ing screwdriver set. I completely froze and just said ok hung up the phone and brought it to him and all I said to him was ok. Later when he got home he asked me why was wrong and I told him I was upset with your response to me making a joke and he started getting defensive and raising his voice at me it got to the point where he said he just wants me gone witch hurt and I am not proud of it but I told him fine you want me gone then I will just leave and I left the house I did not go far I have a pet chicken on the side of the house and I went over there to calm myself down and I heard him run downstairs and see if I was outside of witch he did not see me and started texting me asking me where am I going and I told him why do you care and he just responds with “I just want to be not abused is that so hard”. He then goes on to explain that he feels like he can’t talk to me and that I just run away from my problems. I ended up staying outside for an hour in the dark 12am-1am and when I did go back inside he did apologize for his actions to me joke. I am not saying I am angle bc in no means I am the perfect gf and I am not blaming everything on him. Which he thinks I am blaming it all on him. I honestly think with him doing school me working and his mom and I struggling to adjust with his brother not doing his part completely we are stressed out and I feel like we need to push through some more while working on things but he keeps saying I am the only one who needs to change. He did say at one point that he is working on himself but out of every time we have had a problem he seems to blame me. I am at a point where I don’t know what to do and if I am the one in the wrong or not

So, this is my first time writing on reddit.
I (m21) found out my ex (m24) cheated on me. We have known each other since June last year, we met just a couple weeks after he broke up with his long-time boyfriend of 6 years. We live 1 and a half hours away from each other. I live in Brisbane; he lives in the countryside. So, every weekend we were always together. We started officially dating in September. I was only out at the time to my friends, not to my family, so getting into this relationship was a bit scary because he was out and proud. It’s funny because in the beginning he would try to accuse me of cheating, tell me he’s scared of me cheating, but I would’ve never done that. I loved him. Turns out, he was the one cheating.
In December last year, he told me to respond to an Instagram message for him. After I sent it, I saw a message he had sent this guy, A, he commented on his story, something flirty and it caught my eye. I confronted him about it. He admitted to being “lonely” and wanted to talk to him. Then he tells me he thought the guy was attractive. He was a friend of one of his co-workers. My ex only saw this guy once! Anyways, he would block this guy, then unblock him, then block him again, etc.
There have been times where I’ve had to confront him on a lot of stuff. For example, his ex. He told me his ex was blocked; he would never talk to him but that was all a lie. I would see notifications from his ex, he would tell me, his ex would create all these accounts just to get in contact with him, which that part was true but my problem was that he would never tell me but he never understood why that was a problem. When we went away for our six month anniversary last month, we wanted to watch Netflix but the Netflix on the hotel TV wasn't working so he told me to get his laptop and we'd watch "Is It Cake?" on there. His iMessage dings. He doesn't use iMessage. I see a text from a number and it was like "how dare you use my trauma against me" and "I just want to talk." His ex was always asking for money and would say "I need to talk it's important" and it wouldn't be important. He was always asking for money. I asked him why he didn't tell me he was still talking to his ex, he just told me "he wanted to see the kittens. I said to him if he wanted to buy one, he could see them but if he wasn't buying one, I don't want him near me" and he told me it was no big deal and that he loved me. Told me he deleted and blocked the number but I went through his blocked list, the number wasn't there but I didn't bring it up. I just moved on and wanted to enjoy our holiday. Then, when I was getting my tyres done, he told me about some random number calling him twice and he sent me a screenshot. In the screenshot it showed his call log, like, his calling history. Turns out he was on the phone to his ex, through Instagram the night before after we said "goodnight" to each other. He then said "oh yeah, I forgot to tell you. My ex called me last night about the kittens, again." and I was pissed because how do you forget to tell someone that. We ended up having a huge fight about it, he said he feels bad for his ex because he has no family and all this stuff. All these excuses. Again, I ended up forgiving him and moving on.
Fast forward to Monday, I recieved a friend request on Insta from the guy I confronted my ex about back in December, A, and I knew what was happening but I just deleted his request but then he kept on requesting to follow me. I told my ex about it and he told me not to worry about it. Then, yesterday on Tuesday, all day, I had this sick feeling in my stomach because I had a feeling something was going to happen. Then that night, I received a message from his old co-worker she said "I think you need to see this" and I responded with a question mark because nothing had come through but then the screenshots and screen recordings came through. My heart sank. He has been messaging A since December and messaged him again when he got back from my house after celebrating his birthday with me (I spent over $300 on his presents) and my family (my mum bought me a couple presents too) early because his birthday is on a Monday and I can't be there. (He stayed at mine, Thursday, Friday, and went home on Saturday). That Saturday, was my grandparents 50th wedding anniversary lunch, where my nanna said to my ex "you're apart of the family now", which made me happy but I loved him and I loved that my family loved him but that same Saturday, he went home and texted A. When I was looking at the screenshots of the texts and screen recordings, the screen recordings showed he was on Tinder. I was fucking mad. I called him immediately and said "what the fuck!" and I started reading out the texts he would send this guy on Instagram and on Snapchat. The other guy, A, didn't entertain him. He would just ignore him or just have small talk but it was just my boyfriend doing the flirting but what broke me was when A asked my ex "who's the J in your bio" and my ex said "that's my boyfriend. We're in an open relationship." I felt my heart break into a million pieces. He basically confirmed everything, said he was on Tinder and said he was on Grindr, and he said he was last on Grindr "two days ago" and yesterday, two days ago, was Sunday. I was at his house, he would've been on it when I left his. I felt so many different feelings all at once, I felt like I was going to burst. I then, just went over to my best friend's house but both A and my ex, told me they haven't had sex and my ex told me, that even though he was on Grindr and Tinder, he didn't sleep with anyone just talked to a couple guys and that's it.
I obviously broke up with him yesterday but we're stilling messaging each other. I even called him last night after I got back from my friend's house and we spoke more about the situation. I know still having contact with him isn't good for me but I still love him. Even though we only dated for six-almost seven months, I still love him. I think because this is my first relationship, I want to cling on this but at the same time, I know I deserve better. I haven't cried yet. I don't think I will tbh. He keeps saying how he's sorry and how he feels guilty and all I can think is then why do any of this in the first place? I told him last night, if you were feeling this way, talk to me, hell even break up with me. I remember in the beginning our relationship, I told him that he'd have to break up with me because I don't like the idea of me breaking up with someone but hey, I broke up with him. He told me he had made some "big mistakes" and I said "you made choices. Not mistakes. Calling it a mistake is trying to avoid that the idea has a consequence" then he said "if you want me to suffer than just don't ever get back with me" and I said "I don't want you to suffer but no, I don't see us getting back together. I love you and I've forgiven you for the past shady shit you've done and I can forgive you for this but I will never forget it." I just can't be with him knowing he did this. I had this feeling for months that he was doing stuff behind my back and now that's it all confirmed, it makes me feel good now that I don't have to constantly worry about what my boyfriend is doing. I would worry so much it was making me sick. He would tell me he loved me, he wanted to marry me, he bought me a promise ring, he told me he wanted kids with me, told me he wanted to do everything with me. He told me how sorry he was, how guilty he felt because he said I'm the sweetest, kindest, caring, funniest and most loving person he's ever met and he's going to miss me heaps but all I can think about is like if he did love me, if he did think of me like that, why would he do what he did.
This morning, we were talking some more and I told him that even that I hated what happened, that I was still thankful for the memories because before him, I wasn't doing anything. I was just working and going to uni. My life was pretty boring but thanks to him, I found this confidence and I got all this self-esteem but even though it's only been a day, I can feel my confidence and self-esteem going away. I told my family this morning, well, I told my youngest sister (15) last night because she saw how upset I was and she said "you want me to beat him up" and my other sister (17), I told her this morning and she just called him a cunt and told me I'm better off. My mum, she loved my boyfriend so she was a bit disappointed in him but I was happy when she didn't react, she just sat there and listened to me and told me "maybe you two will work things out" and I told her "no, I don't think I can" and she said "and that's fine." I wish I could talk to my dad but I'm not out to him because he's like crazy homophobic even though my sisters have told me he's asked them if my ex and I were dating lol and said he's ok with it and will love me but I don't know, I'm just still scared to tell him. Maybe one day. My cousin (26) though, I'm very close with her, she's pan, I came out to her two years ago when we went to spread our aunties ashes (weird I know but we went for a walk and it felt right) and she basically told me "I knew it!" apparently everyone knew I was gay before I even came out. I honestly felt like I hid it well but nope. The only person who had no idea was my mum lol but my cousin told me, how she has never seen me happier and was so shocked when I told her that we broke up and the reason why. She thought he was a good guy. We all thought that.
On my grandparents anniversary card, they've been married for 50 years, which I mentioned above and I wrote "I hope I get to experience your type of love one day" in a sense that my ex and I, would end up celebrating our 50th wedding anniversary, even more in the future but unfortunately we won't but I know I will someday. One day. I'm only 21. I know not all guys are bad but for the mean time, I'll just be focusing on my assignments for uni, work, and getting back into the gym. It's been a while but I'm currently sitting in the library at uni writing this listening to a mix of fun songs and sad songs by Raye, Adele, Beyoncé, Lemonade hits different now that I can relate to the songs except Freedom because I'm not black. Love the song though. I'm white as paper. Milk even. I've been listening to Kim Petras, Ethel Cain, Miss Britney, Ariana Grande, again true story, bye and We Can't be friends hit different now. Who else? Rihanna, Megan thee Stallion, Glorilla, Bia, miss Olivia Rodrigo and some Taytay even though I'm not a big fan of miss swift, her pen game is strong. Respect. I've also been listening to Dua Lipa, Ayesha Erotica, Black Veil Brides, Queen Nicki, Billie Eilish, Chase Atlantic, The Neighbourhood, Charlie XCX, Kylie Minogue, Tate McRae, Villain of the Story, Loreen (Tattoo is amazing!), Doja Cat, also my guilty pleasure song, "Jam" by miss Kim K. I love her. I love a boss bitch. I've been told my music is very confusing. One minute I'm listening to "treat me like a slut" then Yungblud plays.
Anyways, I know I'll be alright.

A stray cat jumped in my car one morning leaving for work back in October 2023. I got her vaccinated so I can let her inside my house and meet my [moms] dog. Vet said she was about 1 year old. She was an indoooutdoor cat with me until one day I noticed she was pregnant in January 2024.
I took her to get spayed in February 2024, after her surgery I took care of her indoors, we grew a close bond and she’s been inside ever since. My mom works from home so my cat is used to having a person [and dog] around while im at work.

• Our landlord is selling the house so we’re moving this weekend. Mom and I will be parting ways to different apartments.

I read that getting a second cat is hit or miss due to the territorial aspect but I don’t want my cat to get depressed by being home alone when I JUST got her used to being indoors less than 4 months ago. Any advice on how to acclimate a second cat or any other ideas would be appreciated.
-Concerned new cat mom

I (16M) graduated last Friday. After the ceremony ended I couldn't find my parents anywhere. I was looking around for them and then I decided to check my phone. My mom sent me a text a while ago letting me know that my sister went into labor and her and my dad were at the hospital. This upset me because I thought my parents were there but realizing that they weren't just made me sad. I saw everyone else with their family taking pictures and stuff and I was just standing there awkwardly not knowing what to do. My mom told me that they would be back asap to come and get me.
They did not. I waited for a good 20 minutes watching everyone else leave. I decided to just walk home because I got tired of waiting. I walked 3 miles before my parents drove by and made a u turn to come and pick me up. They were mad when they saw me walking. They told me that It was disrespectful of me to for leave with out telling them and accusing me of putting myself in danger.
I told them that It wasn't alot of people left at the ceremony and I didn't want to wait anymore. I also told them that they knew it was important for them to be there and they completely bailed on me. They told me that they were sorry and kept trying to justify why they left. I told them that it doesn't make sense for them to leave when my sisters husband were there with her and if they really wanted to abandon me they could have at least had one of them stay with me but they left me with no one to watch me and ruined what was supposed to be a good day for me.
My sister didn't even give birth that day she gave birth like 18 hours later which pissed me off more. The problem is my parents are upset with me because they wanted to take another picture of me with my cap and gown on but I refused. The one they took of me in the car I wasn't smiling and my parents wanted a redo because of it.
I told them no. I said that if they already had a picture of me and that it's all they are gonna get. I told them that there are pictures of me on my school's facebook page and they can screen shot it from there or can leave it alone. If they choose to attend my college graduation they can maybe see me in another cap and gown. But until then, I don't see why I have to put it on just for them when they chose to miss it.
They feel as if I'm punishing them by not allowing them to take a picture of me. I just feel like if they wanted a picture they should've been there. Other than that they can use the ones on Facebook, the one in the car, or none at all.

Obligatory I can’t share this with anybody I know so I decided to make a post about it.
My wife and I just hit $500k net worth. We also have a 6 month old child which has made our life better in every single way. Our journey hasn’t been anything exciting. I’m a CPA working in accounting in industry and my wife is an RN working at a hospital. Our household income is roughly $150k/yr and we’re able to completely avoid daycare costs between her part time schedule and my WFH ability. We live in a MCOL city.
The breakout goes like this:
Treasury Bills - $50,000 Roth IRAs - $48,500 401k - $144,000 Pension - $27,500 HSA - $44,000 Brokerage - $14,000 Home Equity - $51,000 Home Appreciation on top of equity - $145,000 Student Loans - ($30,000)
We closed on our house in March 2020 at a 3.375% interest rate and were very lucky to get the low interest without having to overpay for our home. We have this instant equity from the housing market the past few years, which has significantly helped get us to the $500k NW. In total, our invested assets is $280,000 so we’re almost to the “halfway mark of $1M” being $300k so definitely looking forward to that milestone.
Her student loans were originally at $100,000 back in 2020 but she aggressively picked up shifts at the hospital and the incentives offered for nurses throughout COVID really helped us accelerate paying that down. Since the private loans have been paid off and our loans still aren’t accruing interest, we’ve been putting the excess cash into a Roth IRA for my wife and into Treasury Bills since the interest earned exceeds what interest we’d be paying on the loans.
Ultimately, I don’t know what our FIRE number is. We’re only 30 and I can’t imagine that I won’t keep going until at least 50 years old. I have some projections of what our net worth will look like then, but we’ll see what happens. I expect that we will hit the $1M NW some time in the next 6-7 years. I feel like we’re in the boring middle right now so I’ve decided to shift more of my focus into exercise and getting back in shape rather than figuring out how to manage my expenses and finances since I’m confident in our situation right now. Our 20s was focused on jump starting our careers. The idea for our 30s will be focused on getting back into shape and starting our family.
Definitely would appreciate any input or advice anybody feels like sharing. I love this community and just felt like sharing where we’re at since we’re just two regular people and it’s hard to find situations that are relatable.