Hey everyone,
My game got rejected due to Guideline 4.3. Here's the gameplay video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vb6uBUsOSDg
Anyone has experience dealing with Guideline 4.3 and can share some insights? I already appealed, explaining that my game has online multiplayer battles, but no response yet.
Feeling frustrated after spending six months on this game. Any advice or suggestions would be appreciated. Thanks!

I took a JJ Kavanagh bus from the Dublin airport last week and after 15 hours of flying, I accidentally left one of my luggage bags on a bus in the undercarriage storage area. I immediately realized when I got to the place I was staying so I tried to contact the company. Their offices were closed Sunday so I emailed them per their website. We email back and forth and they are able to locate the bag at one of the depots on Tuesday.
The company was able to deliver the bag back to me in the town the Im in, but immediately upon picking up the bag I noticed it was about half the weight it should have been. I bubbled wrapped several items including a PS5, collector edition games, and a bunch (20-30) of custom 3D printed tabletop miniatures I made. The bubble wrap was there still in the bag, so someone had the time to meticulously undo all my wrapping, check everything out, and place the bubble wrap back in the bag and zip it up.
I immediately went to the Garda station to file a report but no officers were there. There was like 15 people in the lobby waiting and everyone was confused. So I decided to leave and file my report online and left. I got an email back asking for more information and said that it was forwarded to my local Garda station.
The company was being very slow on replying this week and finally made a response saying the public didn't have access to this bag, only employees. Meaning most likely it was an employee at the depot who took my stuff from the lost and found.
I'm wondering what else I can try. Some one suggested putting them on blast on Twitter so I made a post.
While I'm upset at the PS5, I'm even more upset at the miniatures I lost. I lost a friend last year and had his DND minis in there for the memories. If anyone has any guidance on what else to try please let me know!

This is my proposition for the MMO, The Legend of Zelda: War of Hyrule.
Object of the game: The armies of Queen Zelda and King Ganondorf are at war. The game is over upon the assassination of either. The player must choose a faction and cannot change sides until the defeat of Ganondorf or Zelda. It will all start again after. Ganondorf and Zelda are controlled by humans whose full time job is playing the game. There will be six people playing as each. Three people taking an 8 hour shift Monday-Friday and three people on Saturday and Sunday. When one has to call in sick or use PTO, one will take over another's shift. They can turn on AI when they need to go to the bathroom or out to lunch. The people playing as Link and Dark Link are rewarded to the player with the highest kills of their respective factions.
Ganondorf has a country to the north of Hyrule, over the gorge, past the badlands complete with it's own castle, depths, sky islands, and surface. Players to his faction start there. The country is named Drogmire.
Hyrule has been restored and even expanded. Hyrule Castle is even bigger because they put in a middle section of the castle when it got separated and they now have a really big basement going to the bottom of the depths. The final boss area in The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom is repurposed to be part of Hyrule Castle. The damaged areas are also repaired. Hyrule Castle Town Market has been restored to contain a variety of stores.
The game is $10 a month. $5 with a subscription to Nintendo Switch Online. The players of the winning faction get the next month free. Everyone pays the first month. If multiple victories happen in one month, only the first one counts. The monthly fee will contribute to the wages of the people playing as Zelda and Ganondorf, maintenance, and adding additional features.
There are ten playable races. Five to each faction. Everyone starts out with 23 hearts. 17 shrines per race. Other races cannont enter the shrine designed to that particular race. There is a boss at the end of every shrine, but only 17 total. You can rechallenge three of the bosses a day. Upon the completion of a shine a heart container will be awarded. Stamina vessels will be purchased for 2000 rupees each. More shrines may be added as time goes on.
There will be a new separate armor set for shoes.
You can create your own character's physical appearance in an avatar creator. Players have the option of letting AI suggest a physical appearance. In order to avoid everyone wearing the same looking armor, AI will decide what each set of armor looks like or you can edit it yourself. The effect of the armor is the same for everyone. The Hateno Dye Shop can make other alterations besides color change.
Fast travel is limited to once per day. Completed shrines are the fast travel points and the map builder. Shrines also act as a launchpad. Maps are unavailable in enemy territory. This prevents an absolute frenzy to one location when the locations of Zelda or Ganondorf are revealed. Fast travel cannot be done inside enemy territory except to exit. Entering is not allowed.
The new type of Goo called Bliss will he introduced. It is the glowing yellow version of Gloom. Those in Zelda's Faction will experience healing in Bliss while those in Ganondorf's faction will be hurt by Bliss. There will also be a new food called Light Clumps. They offer Bliss Warding for Ganondorf's Factions, but are poison to Zelda's Faction. Dark Clumps are poisonous to Ganondorf's faction. It will cause poison damage if used as a weapon such as fused to an arrow or a melee weapon.
Powers of Purah pads for Zelda's Faction and Astor pads for Ganondorf's faction include Ultrahand, Fuse, Autobuild, Ascend, Rewind, Stasis, and the three new abilities: Grow, Shrink, and Arrow Prefusion. They also act as phones to communicate with other players over a distance.
Playable races to Zelda's faction.
Hylian: Level 3 Stealth Unarmed ability is Earthwake. Sprint upon pressing B. Material drops upon defeat: femurs and ears.
Rito: Level 2 Cold Resistance Unarmed ability is Gust Flight upon pressing B. No stamina is consumed when gliding, but stamina is consumed when obtaining lift. Material drops upon defeat:Beaks and wings.
Goron: Level 2 Fireproof Unarmed ability is Charge. Rolling upon pressing B. Cannot swim, but can walk on bottom of water. Cannot ride horses except giant ones. Material Drops upon defeat are back shells and hands.
Zora: Level 3 Swim Speed. Unarmed ability is Water Slash. Sprinting upon pressing B on land, super speed swimming in water. Cannot drown, even when stamina is depleted. Can swim underwater. Material Drops upon defeat: Head and arm fins.
Gerudo: Level 2 Heat Resistance. Unarmed ability is Riju's Fury. Sprinting upon pressing B. Materials dropped upon defeat: arm bones and rib cages.
Playable characters to Ganondorf's faction.
Bokoblin: Level 3 Speed Up. Unarmed ability is charge. Sprint upon pressing B. Materials dropped on defeat: horns and fangs.
Moblin: Level 3 Bliss Warding Resistance. Unarmed ability is Ground Pound. Sprint upon pressing B. Cannot ride horses except giant ones. Materials dropped upon defeat: horns and fangs.
Lynel: Attack Up Level 3. Unarmed ability is Fire Breath. Dash upon pressing B at the cost of one full stamina wheel. Cannot ride horses, shield surf, or paraglide, or climb. Materials dropped upon defeat: Sharp horn and blunt horn.
Lizalfo: Shock Resistance Level 3 Unarmed ability is Water Ball Spit. Sprint upon pressing B on land, super speed in water. Cannot drown even when stamina is depleted. Can swim underwater. Materials dropped upon defeat: horns and fins.
Gibdo: Defense Up Level 3. Unarmed ability is Sandstorm. Flight upon pressing B. No stamina consumed when gliding, but stamina is consumed when obtaining lift. Materials dropped upon defeat: ribcage and wings.
Ganondorf, Zelda, Link, and Dark Link all have 40 hearts, three stamina wheels, and all max level buffs. All their stock weapons are unbreakable. Melee weapons do 100 damage unfused, bows do 50 damage, and shields have 90 Shield Guard.
In game communication is avaliable. A USB keyboard can be plugged into the Nintendo Switch. Voice chat is also available. Since all Gerudos must be female and all Gorons must be male, there is also an AI voice changer you can use to sound like your opposite gender. Not that a wrong gender sounding voice is unacceptable. It can also be used to personalize your voice for your other characters if you choose.
All forageable materials respawn every midnight in the Pacific time zone because that is where Nintendo of America is located.
Players can buy, sell, donate, or trade items at their own agreed price. To prevent inflation, there will be only 2 billion rupees in the game. The prices in shops will be adjusted by AI in a supply and demand algorithm.
Local 2 player splitscreen is available.
There will be robot factories where people can assemble their own robots that are AI controlled to hunt down enemies.
There will be a real estate system. Players can buy and sell land and houses. They can design their own homes and store any excess items there.
Champions and Divine Beasts
Whomever has the most kills within that race is labeled the Champion. Each Champion is rewarded with a mansion that has its own armory, storage space, and garage for their own Divine Beast. Only Champions may use Divine Beasts. Kills made while piloting a Divine Beasts do not count towards your kills to keep your position as a Champion or to play as Link or Dark Link because Divine Beasts are overpowered. The Divine Beasts include the ones from the Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild and more for Hylians, and all of Ganondorf's faction.
Divine Beast Vah Epona: The Divine Beast that is a horse. Piloted by the Hylian Champion.
Divine Beast Vah Boko: The Divine Beast that is a boar. Piloted by the Bokoblin Champion.
Divine Beasts Vah Ursus. The Divine Beasts that is a bear. Piloted by the Moblin Champion.
Divine Beast Vah Leonis. Divine Beast that is a lion. Piloted by the Lynel Champion.
Divine Beast Vah Saurian. Divine Beast that is a serpent. Piloted by the Lizalfo Champion.
Divine Beast Vah Noctis. Divine Beast that is a bat. Piloted by the Gibdo Champion.
Kill Counts against AI based enemies do not count for being a Champion, Link, or Dark Link.
Death
Upon dying, another race within your faction must be chosen. Your other unplayed races will join you as avatars. The avatars can take damage and be defeated. Food can be used to heal Avatars. Avatars can be double teamed to use unarmed ability. Avatars have unbreakable stock weapons. Avatars can be healed with food. Upon the defeat of all five races, all can respawn. Upon your defeat you lose 1 of your weapons, bows, and shields for any surrounding players to grab. You will also lose 10 materials chosen at random.
New items Goron Bow: Normal arrows into fire arrows automatically.
Light Clump: Bliss Warding food. Poisonous to Zelda's faction.everything isthmus.
Armor of the Depths (Light Version): Bliss Warding armor for Ganondorf's faction.
Ice shoes: Freezes the ground with each step. Allows for walking on water and lava.
Iron Boots: Makes wearer heavy. Allows for walking on floor of water or to stay put in strong wind.
Cockpit: Zonai device that encases user. Possible uses can include the build for submarines. Also allows for shielding for vehicles.
Oxygen Tank: Zonai devices for extra air. Can be used for scuba diving or for additional air for submarine builds.
Gibdo Bow: Normal arrows turn into shock arrows automatically.

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I am currently in university with one exam remaining, it's an online exam in 3 days. After an hour-long phone call with my friend from high school who I hadn't spoken to in months, I mentioned how my motivation to study for this final exam is low as it's online and the last one of the year.
*Context, I started university at 22 because while everyone else was going at 18, my father (who was violent and abusive) was dying of brain cancer and I had to look after him while he slowly deteriorated. I also delt with bullying and severe unmedicated ADHD which cause me problems everywhere in life. Since I got on medication and went through therapy for my past my grades went through the roof and I was able to secure a place at a top 20 university in the world in London. I have many good friends, high self esteem and high quality internships.
Now that you know the context my friend said to me (paraphrased): "Bro you are one of the bravest, toughest smartest guys I know. Saying you can't find motivation for this last exam is a lie and an insult to yourself. I've seen you go through hell in this life, have everyone doubting you, and you never gave up and ended up proving everyone wrong. To tell yourself you cannot find motivation now goes against every single time you have pulled through when nobody except you and our friend group thought you could. You havent always seen the good in yourself, but I have always seen the good in you, and I cannot stand by listening to you undermining the phenomenal person you have become, because it is an insult to what you and me both know to be true. You aint perfect, you don't always act like the smartest guy, I suppose the ADHD doesn't help with that, but I know how special you are because I have seen you do the impossible time and time again, and you owe it to yourself, for all the hell you've been through, to give yourself the credit and the belief you have earned, that you deserve".
I have tears in my eyes rn. My friend usually doesn't express himself emotionally like that, but he's so right. I am so lucky. It's crazy how you can have one million people (including yourself) tell you you're worthless and should give up, but all it takes is for one person to come into your life and tell you you have value, that they believe in you, that you're special. That one person makes you ignore everyone who said otherwise. It feels so good to be recognised, and to be reminded. I had to write this down and share this while its fresh in my memory, but I am going to remember his words forever now. This has lit a fire in me, I am going to get right back to my studies, but I had to share this first..
Anyone who's reading, please be that one person to someone else. and be that person to yourself.

Hi,
So far I played a bit of VR titles both standalone (Pistol Whip, Asgard's Wrath 2, Population: One) and PCVR (HL:Alyx, SW: Squadrons, Asgard's Wrath 1 and Into the Radius) but I'm looking for some FPS games that are still alive and not swarmed with veterans that would wipe me with ease. I heard about Ghost of Tabor, Contractors and Onward but I'm not sure which of those games are still popular. Couple of times I played Population: One I was playing mostly against bots so players population might actually be closer to "one" than I expected ;).
As someone who played Counter Strike for more than decade I'm leaning towards team vs team games and I'm not a big fan of battle royale.
One thing in VR I still don't get is how to hold controllers when shooting longer weapons that use both hands - it is weird to not have a buttstock or something to properly "lean" with a rifle. How do you guys and gals mitigate that? It was so weird and uncomfortable to shoot something that requires you to hold it in both hands.
Also I'm not sure if I should aim for PCVR games with my PC specs (Ryzen 5 3600, RTX3070, 16GB RAM) or should I stick to standalone, MQ3 versions. I'm asking this because HL:Alyx and SW:Squadrons are running great but Into the Radius is looking and running worse than HL:Alyx and without something like "MSI Afterburner but for VR" I have no idea how to troubleshoot it. I read a bit about it but there is so, so much new vocabulary and tech (reprojections, render scale in steamVR and in-game etc.) that I have no idea where to start.
To sum up: looking for a VR online FPS that is not dead, not sure if I should play standalone or PCVR version of that game, not sure how to troubleshoot PCVR performance if I would had to do it. Also - bad at aiming rifles in VR and looking for tips.
Thanks in advance for any recommendations!

I’m going to be in 8th grade on Friday and I’ve been on the same bus since 5th grade I’m on the smaller bus since I have autism adhd medical issues (idk how I can possibly describe pls let me know the correct term) and I’m friends with a girl who sits across from me with her friend My friend has cerbal palsy and her friend has brain damage. Every single day her friend who’s currently a 6th grader brings toys not fidgets which are allowed but a hello kitty bag that blinks and makes noise (which isn’t allowed) and if we hit a tree she screams “BLIMP CHECKS” it really annoys me when my other friend who has a walker races our bus driver she laughs like a maniac (best way I can describe it). When my friend gets on the bus she starts singing loudly with her which also bugs me since I’m sensitive to noise I asked both to please sing quieter. We also hit a bump on the way to the school and they scream “BUMP” and this really upsets the kid in front of them he starts covering his ears the bus driver asks them to be quite the only time she’ll ask. Today my friend said how her class will be having “water slides and making slime on Friday” claming they will be having feild day when our feild day was actually last week and her class already did it and there was no water activity’s I do understand that they might do more but her class already did it. Weeks up before her birthday that will only be what she also talks about she’ll say “*our bus drivers name” I’ll be 14 years old in this amount of days or weeks” she also says she’s the tallest on our route which did actually upset someone (not me) I’m a little bit more taller. There is a kid in a wheelchair on our route and he screams which our driver tells him to stop they sing as loud as he screams. Also about the hello kitty bag I did give her friend a compliment since I love hello kitty. I’m nice to both of them. I’m honestly at my breaking point with both of them I have 3 and a half days left I do have ear buds but I feel like they aren’t helping

Now before you all lynch me as a murderous mob, Let me explain.
Now, you do need to be pretty good at the game to use it proper.
The Ta-Se is actually a fairly good AA gun, which hits extremely hard against air.
Also at higher BRs, any japenese tank has the approximate armour of a wet tissue (excluding the HO-RI ofc), so it's not actually any weaker than the other jap tanks in terms of effectiveness of armour. And sometimes even survives a hit that kills all the crew. Somehow.
It's also rapid fire, unlike most jap tanks which dont generally have an MG that the average player uses, and take quite a while to reload. So it's actually pretty good vs infantry.
The weapons US uses in higher brs, while more powerfull, are generally less accurate, and almost noone takes snipers, so so long as you stay about 75-100m away from a cap point, you shoildnt get sniped often.
It's also very accurate, and can easily take out mg nests, suppress rally points, and has an excellent field of view.
Theres also little tricks like wiggling your gun barrel to protect yourself that you can use.
So while I'm not saying it's the best japenese tank at br 4/5, it certainly performs significantly stronger in higher BR than lower. Which I just find quite funny. And

DAY: MAY 20 2024
5-20-2024

Why nightmares and ‘daymares’ could be early warning signs of autoimmune disease

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5-20-2024 Yoga and meditation-induced altered states of consciousness are common in the general population, study says
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5-20-2024 Examining the benefits of out-of-network care for pediatric moyamoya
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5-20-2024 Study explores links between social media use, mental health and sleep quality
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5-20-2024 How are asthma and heart health linked?
Although the heart and lungs are neighbors in your chest, people may think of them as separate entities with unrelated problems. But a growing body of evidence suggests that asthma—one of the most common lung disorders—is a risk factor for cardiovascular disease. Asthma is a serious chronic disease in which airways are inflamed, often in response to specific triggers. It affects about 25 million people in the U.S., including nearly 5 million children, causing millions of annual visits to doctors’ offices and emergency rooms. “We call these major changes
5-20-2024 STUDY EXPLORES PATIENT TRUST IN PHYSICIANS
Trust in one’s physician drives positive health practices. In a scoping review, SUNY Poly Professor of Sociology Dr. Linda R. Weber discovered new developments in the measurement of trust, identified those measures of trust that have known reliability and validity, and compared those instruments’ conceptualizations, dimensions, and indicators. The paper is published in the journal PLOS ONE. Weber explains that 10 dimensions emerged from the study: fidelity, technical competence, communicative competence, interpersonal competence (i.e., caring), honesty, confidentiality, global, behavioral, fairness, and system trust/accountability. In addition, these findings provide the foundation
5-20-2024 TIMESAVING TIPS FOR COOKING HEALTHY MEALS
Living a busy, fast-paced life can make it hard to find the motivation to cook a healthy meal at home. However, learning some shortcuts in the kitchen can keep your healthy eating goals on track and help you avoid grazing on unhealthy snacks, grabbing the first thing you see in the fridge or going out for fast food. Why cook at home? Research shows that maintaining a healthy weight is challenging when you eat out too frequently. Restaurant portions often are super-sized
5-20-2024 UNDERSTANDING PERIMENOPAUSE VS. MENOPAUSE
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5-20-2024 LOW-DOSE IRON SUPPLEMENTATION HAS NO BENEFIT FOR BREASTFED INFANTS, SHOWS STUDY
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5-20-2024 ALLERGY MEDICATIONS COME WITH HAZARDS: BE AWARE
People with seasonal allergies often turn to over-the-counter and prescription medicines to relieve symptoms like coughing, sneezing, runny nose, congestion and itchy eyes, nose or throat. But they often aren’t aware that these meds—including antihistamines—have as much risk for potential side effects, drug interactions and overdose as other drugs. “All medicines have side effects associated with them even when they are taken appropriately and according to dosing directions on the label,”
5-20-2024 I CAN’T AFFORD OLIVE OIL—WHAT ELSE CAN I USE?
If you buy your olive oil in bulk, you’ve likely been in for a shock in recent weeks. Major supermarkets have been selling olive oil for up to A$65 for a four-liter tin, and up to $26 for a 750 milliliter bottle. We’ve been hearing about the health benefits of olive oil for years. And many of us are adding it to salads, or baking and frying with it. But during a cost-of-living crisis, these high prices can put olive oil out of reach. Let’s take a look at why
5-20-2024 Researchers uncover biological trigger of early puberty
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5-20-2024 Bioluminescence and 3D-printed implants shed light on brain–spinal interactions
Brain-spinal cord duet’s neurodynamic symphony is now accessible to scientists via novel multi-organ implants. Credit: Dmitrijs Celinskis A sensory process such as pain is no ordinary phenomenon—it’s a symphony of neural and vascular interactions orchestrated by the brain and spinal cord. Attempting to dissect this symphony by focusing on a single region is like trying to understand a complex melody by listening to just one instrument. It’s incomplete, potentially misleading, and may result in erroneous conclusions. Enter the Carney Institute’s team of visionaries. Their mission? To develop tools that allow
5-20-2024 New thesis explores cancer treatment that can prevent relapse
. What is the main focus of your thesis? Relapse following initial treatment efficacy remains a major clinical challenge for many cancers. The focus of my thesis has been to explore the therapeutic impact of immune cells in patients with blood cancer (leukemia), by first investigating which cells
5-20-2024 New study reveals health and social benefits of car-free living
Participating in a three-week car-free challenge has enhanced the health and well-being of Oxford residents, according to research conducted by The University of Bath’s Centre for Climate Change and Social Transformations (CAST), in partnership with climate charity Possible and Low Carbon Oxford North (LCON), conducted this research project. After ditching their cars for three weeks, 10 out of the 12 drivers across Oxford who participated said they plan to continue with reduced car use beyond the project. The findings of this research project show that: Day-to-day transport emissions were slashed
5-20-2024 Research shows linked biological pathways driving skin inflammation
A certain biological pathway—a set of linked reactions in the body—drives the inflammation seen in the skin disease psoriasis, a new study finds. The work could lead to improved therapies for all inflammatory skin diseases, including atopic and allergic dermatitis and a type of boil called hidradenitis suppurativa, say the study authors. The findings are published in the journal Immunity. Inflammation is the body’s natural response to irritation and infection, but when out of control, it can lead to the reddish, flaky, itchy lesions that
5-20-2024 Prescription co-payments linked to more hospital admissions in New Zealand, study finds
A new study from researchers cautions that bringing back the $5 co-payment for prescription medicines could see a jump in hospital admissions. The study analyzed health data for 71,502 people and found those who didn’t pick up a prescription because they couldn’t afford the $5 fee had a 34% higher rate of being admitted to hospital.
5-20-2024 How a simulation is informing COVID-19 vaccine policy after our ‘return to normal’
As the saying goes “There is no such thing as normal” and this has been especially true after the pandemic. Before the emergence of the omicron COVID-19 variant, countries like the U.K. had high vaccination coverage along with widespread exposure to COVID-19 in the population. This combination of vaccine and infection-derived immunity is termed hybrid immunity and is different to vaccine immunity or infection immunity alone. In contrast, other countries, including Australia, New Zealand and those in the Western Pacific, had a very different pandemic experience.
5-20-2024 Researchers find intriguing connections between Alzheimer’s disease and other common conditions
A study has found that while some medical conditions appear to increase our likelihood of developing Alzheimer’s disease, others appear to decrease the odds. The study, led by Dr. Yijun (Nicholas) Pan and Dr. Liang Jin, analyzed data from 2,443 older Australians living in Melbourne or Perth who are part of the Australian Imaging, Biomarker and Lifestyle (AIBL) study, an internationally recognized cohort for dementia research. “We found anxiety and other neurological disorders are associated with increased likelihood of Alzheimer’s disease,” Dr. Pan said.
5-20-2024 Prepping autistic or sound-sensitive kids for cicada noise
As Chicagoans await the emergence of the cicadas, parents of children on the autism spectrum and/or who have sensitivities to sound can take a few steps to prepare for what is expected to be a loud summer. “Some children on the spectrum can struggle with loud or unexpected noises, such as toilets that automatically flush, fireworks around the Fourth of July or the emergence of a large number of cicadas,”
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Chronic obstructive pulmonary disease patients with type 2 inflammation may soon gain access to a new drug—dupilumab—that showed rapid and sustained improvements in patients in a pivotal Phase 3 clinical trial, researchers report in the New England Journal of Medicine. This monoclonal antibody is the first biologic shown to improve clinical outcomes in COPD. The data supporting the use of dupilumab in COPD will be reviewed by the United States Food and Drug Administration in June. The disease improvements—as measured by a significantly lower annualized rate of acute exacerbations
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Researchers have successfully developed the technology that can accurately segment different body organs by effectively learning medical image data used for different purposes in different hospitals, which is expected to greatly contribute to the development of large-scale medical AI models in the future.
5-20-2024 Second Phase 3 clinical trial again shows dupilumab lessens disease in COPD patients with type 2 inflammation
Chronic obstructive pulmonary disease patients with type 2 inflammation may soon gain access to a new drug—dupilumab—that showed rapid and sustained improvements in patients in a pivotal Phase 3 clinical trial, researchers report in the New England Journal of Medicine. This monoclonal antibody is the first biologic shown to improve clinical outcomes in COPD. The data supporting the use of dupilumab in COPD will be reviewed by the United States Food and Drug Administration in June. The disease improvements—as measured by a significantly lower annualized rate of acute exacerbations

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Intended Major: Data Science / Computer Science (changes depending on the school i'm applying to)
GPA: 3.81 UW, 4.92 W out of 6 (includes courses from middle school 😭 )
UC Gpa since I am applying to a lot of them: 3.90 UW, 4.57 W, 4.17 weighted and capped
Class Rank: Outside top 10% because of some high school courses I took during 7th and 8th grade. Got straight Bs and Cs unfortunately.
SAT: 1450 (750M 700 RW, didn't study at all, trying again in august after studying)
Race: Asian
Gender: Male
Background: middle-class immigrant family.
School: Competitive Public High School
State: Texas
19 APs total (12 taken so far) AP Human Geography- 4, AP World - 5, AP Physics 1- 5, failed Spanish Lang 💀, waiting on all others
Senior year course load - AP Stats, AP Physics C (Mech and E&M), AP Gov/Econ, AP Lit, Data Structures And Algorithms (course after AP CSA, gpa is weighted the same as AP), and Calc III / Differential Equations dual enrollment, APES.
Main Extracurriculars:

1. Created an open-source flight board website/app for a Flight Simulator Multiplayer server that displays information on each flight including departure/arrival times and status. Displays busiest airports and flight routes, and predicts future routes and flight recommendations based on historical data such as ATC availability. Website has 400 users and receives approximately 4.5K visits daily, with a maximum of 1022 distinct users in April. I have also created my own API that gives relevant information such as time remaining and specific departure times that are not shown in the original API that I used to create the flight board.
   
2. Interning at State School’s CS lab this summer and will research and create a final project about how businesses use the data they collect to make future decisions to increase profit. This aligns with my goal of becoming a data scientist and going into the machine learning field, so I thought this would be pretty important.
   
3. Active addon creator for Microsoft Flight Simulator - Developed many addons such as aircraft liveries, realistically modeled airports, and the biggest one being a graphics mod to make the sim look more realistic. ~2500 downloads for all mods
   
4. Computer Science Club: Competed in multiple competitive coding competitions such as UTD Battle of the Brains, A&M Codewars, Lockheed Martin Codequest, Computer Science UIL, and many other online ones such as Devpost and CyberPatriots (did this with my friends for fun, unfortunately didnt win anything). I have also demoed my personal projects in this club and have helped members with learning Python and HTML, since our school’s curriculum is only based on Java.
   
5. Personal Computer Science Projects - Just a couple of projects that I made in the past few years that have helped me improve my understanding of coding. My school only offers Java, so these projects were incredibly helpful when it came to understanding R, Python, and JavaScript. My favorite project is a volunteer log tool that breaks down my total hours based on the number of hours that I have volunteered at my local food packing facility and how many boxes each table can pack. Using this information, I can derive how many boxes I have personally helped make and how many children I have fed through my contributions.
   
6. Created a review guide for AP Physics 1 that compiled the most important formulas and concepts from our lessons and resources. I also compiled an entire mock exam’s worth of MCQ and FRQ questions to test the hardest questions from each unit. On exam day, there were 54 people on the doc, so there were at least 50 people I impacted with this. I have also recently started a tutoring service for people who are struggling with physics and people who are taking Physics in the future (doing it on Saturday and Sunday every week).
   
7. Volunteering at a local food packing facility for ~105 hours. Volunteered at every position including pourer, bagger, weigher, and warehouse crew.
   
8. Volunteering at NHS organized events for 15 hours.
   
9. Completed Harvard’s CS50 course back in sophomore year (my website stated above evolved from my final project for CS50, which was a flight board on command prompt lol)
   
10. Part of the National Science Honors Society and Cybersecurity club at my school.
    

Awards (I am cooked 😔):

1. National Merit Commended (probably gonna get this)
   
2. PVSA silver award
   
3. Computer Science UIL awards
   
4. AP Scholar (probably with distinciton in july)
   

LOR: AP Calc - 8 (maybe 9) /10, did really well in her class and asked a lot of questions. she was also impressed by my resume, but I didn't talk to her a lot personally. I've heard that she writes good rec letters tho. AP Physics - 7/10
Schools:
Reach : UT Austin (Statistics / Data Science), UMich (CS lsa), UC Berkeley (Applied Math, my dream school), UCLA (Stats/Data Science), Purdue (CS or AI major), UIUC (Computer Engineering or CS + Stats), UCSD (data science or Math-CS), UCI (CS), UCSB (CE), UW Madison (CS), Georgia Tech (CS, doing this one for fun lol), USC
Target: Texas A&M Engineering (attainable dream school), UT Dallas (CS), Colorado Boulder (CS), UMD College Park (CS), Penn State (CS), NCSU (CS)
Safety (if I get into UTD rolling then i wont apply here): UNT, Texas Tech, ASU
Notes: I want to settle in the bay area after going to college, and want to become a data scientist (seems more interesting to me than becoming a swe, my opinion might change) at a well-respected company, preferably in the aerospace industry since I've had an interest in aviation since my childhood. I might also do grad school.
Thoughts?

GOOOOOOOOOOD MORNING SUPERSTONKERS! HAHA. It's me again. Yeah, i slipped past the defenses again to drop this off so you can all refresh yourselves on the state of FUD and disinformation in this protracted fight against the legal larcenists doing their best to try and get you to sell. Please spread this amongst the holders, the more people know the less power they have over us holders. We don't sell until we get a call from marge, and that's always been the play.
TLDR: This is a set of tactics used by the Alphabet Boys(CIA, FBI, DEA) to control and manipulate us into drama to collapse our communities and movements. And should be read in full by anyone willing and wanting to learn how these things work.
I've come to notice recently, people keep asking me to repost this for the sake of keeping the new people abreast on what needs to be done to protect the holders of GME. Beneath here will be a detailed account on what you need to be aware of in your online interactions, to avoid being taken for a fool!
_______________________________________________________________________

1. COINTELPRO Techniques for dilution, misdirection and control of a internet forum
2. Twenty-Five Rules of Disinformation
3. Eight Traits of the Disinformationalist
4. How to Spot a Spy (Cointelpro Agent)
5. Seventeen Techniques for Truth Suppression

_______________________________________________________________________
COINTELPRO Techniques for dilution, misdirection and control of a internet forum..
There are several techniques for the control and manipulation of a internet forum no matter what, or who is on it. We will go over each technique and demonstrate that only a minimal number of operatives can be used to eventually and effectively gain a control of a 'uncontrolled forum.'
Technique #1 - 'FORUM SLIDING'
If a very sensitive posting of a critical nature has been posted on a forum - it can be quickly removed from public view by 'forum sliding.' In this technique a number of unrelated posts are quietly prepositioned on the forum and allowed to 'age.' Each of these misdirectional forum postings can then be called upon at will to trigger a 'forum slide.' The second requirement is that several fake accounts exist, which can be called upon, to ensure that this technique is not exposed to the public. To trigger a 'forum slide' and 'flush' the critical post out of public view it is simply a matter of logging into each account both real and fake and then 'replying' to prepositioned postings with a simple 1 or 2 line comment. This brings the unrelated postings to the top of the forum list, and the critical posting 'slides' down the front page, and quickly out of public view. Although it is difficult or impossible to censor the posting it is now lost in a sea of unrelated and unuseful postings. By this means it becomes effective to keep the readers of the forum reading unrelated and non-issue items.
Technique #2 - 'CONSENSUS CRACKING'
A second highly effective technique (which you can see in operation all the time at www.abovetopsecret.com
) is 'consensus cracking.' To develop a consensus crack, the following technique is used. Under the guise of a fake account a posting is made which looks legitimate and is towards the truth is made - but the critical point is that it has a VERY WEAK PREMISE without substantive proof to back the posting. Once this is done then under alternative fake accounts a very strong position in your favor is slowly introduced over the life of the posting. It is IMPERATIVE that both sides are initially presented, so the uninformed reader cannot determine which side is the truth. As postings and replies are made the stronger 'evidence' or disinformation in your favor is slowly 'seeded in.' Thus the uninformed reader will most like develop the same position as you, and if their position is against you their opposition to your posting will be most likely dropped. However in some cases where the forum members are highly educated and can counter your disinformation with real facts and linked postings, you can then 'abort' the consensus cracking by initiating a 'forum slide.'
Technique #3 - 'TOPIC DILUTION'
Topic dilution is not only effective in forum sliding it is also very useful in keeping the forum readers on unrelated and non-productive issues. This is a critical and useful technique to cause a 'RESOURCE BURN.' By implementing continual and non-related postings that distract and disrupt (trolling ) the forum readers they are more effectively stopped from anything of any real productivity. If the intensity of gradual dilution is intense enough, the readers will effectively stop researching and simply slip into a 'gossip mode.' In this state they can be more easily misdirected away from facts towards uninformed conjecture and opinion. The less informed they are the more effective and easy it becomes to control the entire group in the direction that you would desire the group to go in. It must be stressed that a proper assessment of the psychological capabilities and levels of education is first determined of the group to determine at what level to 'drive in the wedge.' By being too far off topic too quickly it may trigger censorship by a forum moderator.
Technique #4 - 'INFORMATION COLLECTION'
Information collection is also a very effective method to determine the psychological level of the forum members, and to gather intelligence that can be used against them. In this technique in a light and positive environment a 'show you mine so me yours' posting is initiated. From the number of replies and the answers that are provided much statistical information can be gathered. An example is to post your 'favorite weapon' and then encourage other members of the forum to showcase what they have. In this matter it can be determined by reverse proration what percentage of the forum community owns a firearm, and or a illegal weapon. This same method can be used by posing as one of the form members and posting your favorite 'technique of operation.' From the replies various methods that the group utilizes can be studied and effective methods developed to stop them from their activities.
Technique #5 - 'ANGER TROLLING'
Statistically, there is always a percentage of the forum posters who are more inclined to violence. In order to determine who these individuals are, it is a requirement to present a image to the forum to deliberately incite a strong psychological reaction. From this the most violent in the group can be effectively singled out for reverse IP location and possibly local enforcement tracking. To accomplish this only requires posting a link to a video depicting a local police officer massively abusing his power against a very innocent individual. Statistically of the million or so police officers in America there is always one or two being caught abusing there powers and the taping of the activity can be then used for intelligence gathering purposes - without the requirement to 'stage' a fake abuse video. This method is extremely effective, and the more so the more abusive the video can be made to look. Sometimes it is useful to 'lead' the forum by replying to your own posting with your own statement of violent intent, and that you 'do not care what the authorities think!!' inflammation. By doing this and showing no fear it may be more effective in getting the more silent and self-disciplined violent intent members of the forum to slip and post their real intentions. This can be used later in a court of law during prosecution.
Technique #6 - 'GAINING FULL CONTROL'
It is important to also be harvesting and continually maneuvering for a forum moderator position. Once this position is obtained, the forum can then be effectively and quietly controlled by deleting unfavourable postings - and one can eventually steer the forum into complete failure and lack of interest by the general public. This is the 'ultimate victory' as the forum is no longer participated with by the general public and no longer useful in maintaining their freedoms. Depending on the level of control you can obtain, you can deliberately steer a forum into defeat by censoring postings, deleting memberships, flooding, and or accidentally taking the forum offline. By this method the forum can be quickly killed. However it is not always in the interest to kill a forum as it can be converted into a 'honey pot' gathering center to collect and misdirect newcomers and from this point be completely used for your control for your agenda purposes.
CONCLUSION
Remember these techniques are only effective if the forum participants DO NOT KNOW ABOUT THEM. Once they are aware of these techniques the operation can completely fail, and the forum can become uncontrolled. At this point other avenues must be considered such as initiating a false legal precidence to simply have the forum shut down and taken offline. This is not desirable as it then leaves the enforcement agencies unable to track the percentage of those in the population who always resist attempts for control against them. Many other techniques can be utilized and developed by the individual and as you develop further techniques of infiltration and control it is imperative to share then with HQ.
_______________________________________________________________________
Twenty-Five Rules of Disinformation
Note: The first rule and last five (or six, depending on situation) rules are generally not directly within the ability of the traditional disinfo artist to apply. These rules are generally used more directly by those at the leadership, key players, or planning level of the criminal conspiracy or conspiracy to cover up.
1. Hear no evil, see no evil, speak no evil. Regardless of what you know, don't discuss it -- especially if you are a public figure, news anchor, etc. If it's not reported, it didn't happen, and you never have to deal with the issues.
2. Become incredulous and indignant. Avoid discussing key issues and instead focus on side issues which can be used show the topic as being critical of some otherwise sacrosanct group or theme. This is also known as the 'How dare you!' gambit.
3. Create rumor mongers. Avoid discussing issues by describing all charges, regardless of venue or evidence, as mere rumors and wild accusations. Other derogatory terms mutually exclusive of truth may work as well. This method which works especially well with a silent press, because the only way the public can learn of the facts are through such 'arguable rumors'. If you can associate the material with the Internet, use this fact to certify it a 'wild rumor' from a 'bunch of kids on the Internet' which can have no basis in fact.
4. Use a straw man. Find or create a seeming element of your opponent's argument which you can easily knock down to make yourself look good and the opponent to look bad. Either make up an issue you may safely imply exists based on your interpretation of the opponent/opponent arguments/situation, or select the weakest aspect of the weakest charges. Amplify their significance and destroy them in a way which appears to debunk all the charges, real and fabricated alike, while actually avoiding discussion of the real issues.
5. Sidetrack opponents with name calling and ridicule. This is also known as the primary 'attack the messenger' ploy, though other methods qualify as variants of that approach. Associate opponents with unpopular titles such as 'kooks', 'right-wing', 'liberal', 'left-wing', 'terrorists', 'conspiracy buffs', 'radicals', 'militia', 'racists', 'religious fanatics', 'sexual deviates', and so forth. This makes others shrink from support out of fear of gaining the same label, and you avoid dealing with issues.
6. Hit and Run. In any public forum, make a brief attack of your opponent or the opponent position and then scamper off before an answer can be fielded, or simply ignore any answer. This works extremely well in Internet and letters-to-the-editor environments where a steady stream of new identities can be called upon without having to explain criticism, reasoning -- simply make an accusation or other attack, never discussing issues, and never answering any subsequent response, for that would dignify the opponent's viewpoint.
7. Question motives. Twist or amplify any fact which could be taken to imply that the opponent operates out of a hidden personal agenda or other bias. This avoids discussing issues and forces the accuser on the defensive.
8. Invoke authority. Claim for yourself or associate yourself with authority and present your argument with enough 'jargon' and 'minutia' to illustrate you are 'one who knows', and simply say it isn't so without discussing issues or demonstrating concretely why or citing sources.
9. Play Dumb. No matter what evidence or logical argument is offered, avoid discussing issues except with denials they have any credibility, make any sense, provide any proof, contain or make a point, have logic, or support a conclusion. Mix well for maximum effect.
10. Associate opponent charges with old news. A derivative of the straw man -- usually, in any large-scale matter of high visibility, someone will make charges early on which can be or were already easily dealt with - a kind of investment for the future should the matter not be so easily contained.) Where it can be foreseen, have your own side raise a straw man issue and have it dealt with early on as part of the initial contingency plans. Subsequent charges, regardless of validity or new ground uncovered, can usually then be associated with the original charge and dismissed as simply being a rehash without need to address current issues -- so much the better where the opponent is or was involved with the original source.
11. Establish and rely upon fall-back positions. Using a minor matter or element of the facts, take the 'high road' and 'confess' with candor that some innocent mistake, in hindsight, was made -- but that opponents have seized on the opportunity to blow it all out of proportion and imply greater criminalities which, 'just isn't so.' Others can reinforce this on your behalf, later, and even publicly 'call for an end to the nonsense' because you have already 'done the right thing.' Done properly, this can garner sympathy and respect for 'coming clean' and 'owning up' to your mistakes without addressing more serious issues.
12. Enigmas have no solution. Drawing upon the overall umbrella of events surrounding the crime and the multitude of players and events, paint the entire affair as too complex to solve. This causes those otherwise following the matter to begin to lose interest more quickly without having to address the actual issues.
13. Alice in Wonderland Logic. Avoid discussion of the issues by reasoning backwards or with an apparent deductive logic which forbears any actual material fact.
14. Demand complete solutions. Avoid the issues by requiring opponents to solve the crime at hand completely, a ploy which works best with issues qualifying for rule 10.
15. Fit the facts to alternate conclusions. This requires creative thinking unless the crime was planned with contingency conclusions in place.
16. Vanish evidence and witnesses. If it does not exist, it is not fact, and you won't have to address the issue.
17. Change the subject. Usually in connection with one of the other ploys listed here, find a way to side-track the discussion with abrasive or controversial comments in hopes of turning attention to a new, more manageable topic. This works especially well with companions who can 'argue' with you over the new topic and polarize the discussion arena in order to avoid discussing more key issues.
18. Emotionalize, Antagonize, and Goad Opponents. If you can't do anything else, chide and taunt your opponents and draw them into emotional responses which will tend to make them look foolish and overly motivated, and generally render their material somewhat less coherent. Not only will you avoid discussing the issues in the first instance, but even if their emotional response addresses the issue, you can further avoid the issues by then focusing on how 'sensitive they are to criticism.'
19. Ignore proof presented, demand impossible proofs. This is perhaps a variant of the 'play dumb' rule. Regardless of what material may be presented by an opponent in public forums, claim the material irrelevant and demand proof that is impossible for the opponent to come by (it may exist, but not be at his disposal, or it may be something which is known to be safely destroyed or withheld, such as a murder weapon.) In order to completely avoid discussing issues, it may be required that you to categorically deny and be critical of media or books as valid sources, deny that witnesses are acceptable, or even deny that statements made by government or other authorities have any meaning or relevance.
20. False evidence. Whenever possible, introduce new facts or clues designed and manufactured to conflict with opponent presentations -- as useful tools to neutralize sensitive issues or impede resolution. This works best when the crime was designed with contingencies for the purpose, and the facts cannot be easily separated from the fabrications.
21. Call a Grand Jury, Special Prosecutor, or other empowered investigative body. Subvert the (process) to your benefit and effectively neutralize all sensitive issues without open discussion. Once convened, the evidence and testimony are required to be secret when properly handled. For instance, if you own the prosecuting attorney, it can insure a Grand Jury hears no useful evidence and that the evidence is sealed and unavailable to subsequent investigators. Once a favorable verdict is achieved, the matter can be considered officially closed. Usually, this technique is applied to find the guilty innocent, but it can also be used to obtain charges when seeking to frame a victim.
22. Manufacture a new truth. Create your own expert(s), group(s), author(s), leader(s) or influence existing ones willing to forge new ground via scientific, investigative, or social research or testimony which concludes favorably. In this way, if you must actually address issues, you can do so authoritatively.
23. Create bigger distractions. If the above does not seem to be working to distract from sensitive issues, or to prevent unwanted media coverage of unstoppable events such as trials, create bigger news stories (or treat them as such) to distract the multitudes.
24. Silence critics. If the above methods do not prevail, consider removing opponents from circulation by some definitive solution so that the need to address issues is removed entirely. This can be by their death, arrest and detention, blackmail or destruction of their character by release of blackmail information, or merely by destroying them financially, emotionally, or severely damaging their health.
25. Vanish. If you are a key holder of secrets or otherwise overly illuminated and you think the heat is getting too hot, to avoid the issues, vacate the kitchen.
_______________________________________________________________________
Eight Traits of the Disinformationalist
1) Avoidance. They never actually discuss issues head-on or provide constructive input, generally avoiding citation of references or credentials. Rather, they merely imply this, that, and the other. Virtually everything about their presentation implies their authority and expert knowledge in the matter without any further justification for credibility.
2) Selectivity. They tend to pick and choose opponents carefully, either applying the hit-and-run approach against mere commentators supportive of opponents, or focusing heavier attacks on key opponents who are known to directly address issues. Should a commentator become argumentative with any success, the focus will shift to include the commentator as well.
3) Coincidental. They tend to surface suddenly and somewhat coincidentally with a new controversial topic with no clear prior record of participation in general discussions in the particular public arena involved. They likewise tend to vanish once the topic is no longer of general concern. They were likely directed or elected to be there for a reason, and vanish with the reason.
4) Teamwork. They tend to operate in self-congratulatory and complementary packs or teams. Of course, this can happen naturally in any public forum, but there will likely be an ongoing pattern of frequent exchanges of this sort where professionals are involved. Sometimes one of the players will infiltrate the opponent camp to become a source for straw man or other tactics designed to dilute opponent presentation strength.
5) Anti-conspiratorial. They almost always have disdain for 'conspiracy theorists' and, usually, for those who in any way believe JFK was not killed by LHO. Ask yourself why, if they hold such disdain for conspiracy theorists, do they focus on defending a single topic discussed in a NG focusing on conspiracies? One might think they would either be trying to make fools of everyone on every topic, or simply ignore the group they hold in such disdain. Or, one might more rightly conclude they have an ulterior motive for their actions in going out of their way to focus as they do.
6) Artificial Emotions. An odd kind of 'artificial' emotionalism and an unusually thick skin -- an ability to persevere and persist even in the face of overwhelming criticism and unacceptance. This likely stems from intelligence community training that, no matter how condemning the evidence, deny everything, and never become emotionally involved or reactive. The net result for a disinfo artist is that emotions can seem artificial.
Most people, if responding in anger, for instance, will express their animosity throughout their rebuttal. But disinfo types usually have trouble maintaining the 'image' and are hot and cold with respect to pretended emotions and their usually more calm or unemotional communications style. It's just a job, and they often seem unable to 'act their role in character' as well in a communications medium as they might be able in a real face-to-face conversation/confrontation. You might have outright rage and indignation one moment, ho-hum the next, and more anger later -- an emotional yo-yo.
With respect to being thick-skinned, no amount of criticism will deter them from doing their job, and they will generally continue their old disinfo patterns without any adjustments to criticisms of how obvious it is that they play that game -- where a more rational individual who truly cares what others think might seek to improve their communications style, substance, and so forth, or simply give up.
7) Inconsistent. There is also a tendency to make mistakes which betray their true self/motives. This may stem from not really knowing their topic, or it may be somewhat 'freudian', so to speak, in that perhaps they really root for the side of truth deep within.
I have noted that often, they will simply cite contradictory information which neutralizes itself and the author. For instance, one such player claimed to be a Navy pilot, but blamed his poor communicating skills (spelling, grammar, incoherent style) on having only a grade-school education. I'm not aware of too many Navy pilots who don't have a college degree. Another claimed no knowledge of a particular topic/situation but later claimed first-hand knowledge of it.
8) Time Constant. Recently discovered, with respect to News Groups, is the response time factor. There are three ways this can be seen to work, especially when the government or other empowered player is involved in a cover up operation:
a) ANY NG posting by a targeted proponent for truth can result in an IMMEDIATE response. The government and other empowered players can afford to pay people to sit there and watch for an opportunity to do some damage. SINCE DISINFO IN A NG ONLY WORKS IF THE READER SEES IT - FAST RESPONSE IS CALLED FOR, or the visitor may be swayed towards truth.
b) When dealing in more direct ways with a disinformationalist, such as email, DELAY IS CALLED FOR - there will usually be a minimum of a 48-72 hour delay. This allows a sit-down team discussion on response strategy for best effect, and even enough time to 'get permission' or instruction from a formal chain of command.
c) In the NG example 1) above, it will often ALSO be seen that bigger guns are drawn and fired after the same 48-72 hours delay - the team approach in play. This is especially true when the targeted truth seeker or their comments are considered more important with respect to potential to reveal truth. Thus, a serious truth sayer will be attacked twice for the same sin.
_______________________________________________________________________
How to Spot a Spy (Cointelpro Agent)
One way to neutralize a potential activist is to get them to be in a group that does all the wrong things. Why?
1) The message doesn't get out.
2) A lot of time is wasted
3) The activist is frustrated and discouraged
4) Nothing good is accomplished.
FBI and Police Informers and Infiltrators will infest any group and they have phoney activist organizations established.
Their purpose is to prevent any real movement for justice or eco-peace from developing in this country.
Agents come in small, medium or large. They can be of any ethnic background. They can be male or female.
The actual size of the group or movement being infiltrated is irrelevant. It is the potential the movement has for becoming large which brings on the spies and saboteurs.
This booklet lists tactics agents use to slow things down, foul things up, destroy the movement and keep tabs on activists.
It is the agent's job to keep the activist from quitting such a group, thus keeping him/her under control.
In some situations, to get control, the agent will tell the activist:

• "You're dividing the movement."

[Here, I have added the psychological reasons as to WHY this maneuver works to control people]
This invites guilty feelings. Many people can be controlled by guilt. The agents begin relationships with activists behind a well-developed mask of "dedication to the cause." Because of their often declared dedication, (and actions designed to prove this), when they criticize the activist, he or she - being truly dedicated to the movement - becomes convinced that somehow, any issues are THEIR fault. This is because a truly dedicated person tends to believe that everyone has a conscience and that nobody would dissimulate and lie like that "on purpose." It's amazing how far agents can go in manipulating an activist because the activist will constantly make excuses for the agent who regularly declares their dedication to the cause. Even if they do, occasionally, suspect the agent, they will pull the wool over their own eyes by rationalizing: "they did that unconsciously... they didn't really mean it... I can help them by being forgiving and accepting " and so on and so forth.
The agent will tell the activist:

• "You're a leader!"

This is designed to enhance the activist's self-esteem. His or her narcissistic admiration of his/her own activist/altruistic intentions increase as he or she identifies with and consciously admires the altruistic declarations of the agent which are deliberately set up to mirror those of the activist.
This is "malignant pseudo identification." It is the process by which the agent consciously imitates or simulates a certain behavior to foster the activist's identification with him/her, thus increasing the activist's vulnerability to exploitation. The agent will simulate the more subtle self-concepts of the activist.
Activists and those who have altruistic self-concepts are most vulnerable to malignant pseudo identification especially during work with the agent when the interaction includes matter relating to their competency, autonomy, or knowledge.
The goal of the agent is to increase the activist's general empathy for the agent through pseudo-identification with the activist's self-concepts.
The most common example of this is the agent who will compliment the activist for his competency or knowledge or value to the movement. On a more subtle level, the agent will simulate affects and mannerisms of the activist which promotes identification via mirroring and feelings of "twinship". It is not unheard of for activists, enamored by the perceived helpfulness and competence of a good agent, to find themselves considering ethical violations and perhaps, even illegal behavior, in the service of their agent/handler.
The activist's "felt quality of perfection" [self-concept] is enhanced, and a strong empathic bond is developed with the agent through his/her imitation and simulation of the victim's own narcissistic investments. [self-concepts] That is, if the activist knows, deep inside, their own dedication to the cause, they will project that onto the agent who is "mirroring" them.
The activist will be deluded into thinking that the agent shares this feeling of identification and bonding. In an activist/social movement setting, the adversarial roles that activists naturally play vis a vis the establishment/government, fosters ongoing processes of intrapsychic splitting so that "twinship alliances" between activist and agent may render whole sectors or reality testing unavailable to the activist. They literally "lose touch with reality."
Activists who deny their own narcissistic investments [do not have a good idea of their own self-concepts and that they ARE concepts] and consciously perceive themselves (accurately, as it were) to be "helpers" endowed with a special amount of altruism are exceedingly vulnerable to the affective (emotional) simulation of the accomplished agent.
Empathy is fostered in the activist through the expression of quite visible affects. The presentation of tearfulness, sadness, longing, fear, remorse, and guilt, may induce in the helper-oriented activist a strong sense of compassion, while unconsciously enhancing the activist's narcissistic investment in self as the embodiment of goodness.
The agent's expresssion of such simulated affects may be quite compelling to the observer and difficult to distinguish from deep emotion.
It can usually be identified by two events, however:
First, the activist who has analyzed his/her own narcissistic roots and is aware of his/her own potential for being "emotionally hooked," will be able to remain cool and unaffected by such emotional outpourings by the agent.
As a result of this unaffected, cool, attitude, the Second event will occur: The agent will recompensate much too quickly following such an affective expression leaving the activist with the impression that "the play has ended, the curtain has fallen," and the imposture, for the moment, has finished. The agent will then move quickly to another activist/victim.
The fact is, the movement doesn't need leaders, it needs MOVERS. "Follow the leader" is a waste of time.
A good agent will want to meet as often as possible. He or she will talk a lot and say little. One can expect an onslaught of long, unresolved discussions.
Some agents take on a pushy, arrogant, or defensive manner:
1) To disrupt the agenda
2) To side-track the discussion
3) To interrupt repeatedly
4) To feign ignorance
5) To make an unfounded accusation against a person.
Calling someone a racist, for example. This tactic is used to discredit a person in the eyes of all other group members.
Saboteurs
Some saboteurs pretend to be activists. She or he will ....
1) Write encyclopedic flyers (in the present day, websites)
2) Print flyers in English only.
3) Have demonstrations in places where no one cares.
4) Solicit funding from rich people instead of grass roots support
5) Display banners with too many words that are confusing.
6) Confuse issues.
7) Make the wrong demands.
8) Compromise the goal.
9) Have endless discussions that waste everyone's time. The agent may accompany the endless discussions with drinking, pot smoking or other amusement to slow down the activist's work.
Provocateurs
1) Want to establish "leaders" to set them up for a fall in order to stop the movement.
2) Suggest doing foolish, illegal things to get the activists in trouble.
3) Encourage militancy.
4) Want to taunt the authorities.
5) Attempt to make the activist compromise their values.
6) Attempt to instigate violence. Activism ought to always be non-violent.
7) Attempt to provoke revolt among people who are ill-prepared to deal with the reaction of the authorities to such violence.
Informants
1) Want everyone to sign up and sing in and sign everything.
2) Ask a lot of questions (gathering data).
3) Want to know what events the activist is planning to attend.
4) Attempt to make the activist defend him or herself to identify his or her beliefs, goals, and level of commitment.
Recruiting
Legitimate activists do not subject people to hours of persuasive dialog. Their actions, beliefs, and goals speak for themselves.
Groups that DO recruit are missionaries, military, and fake political parties or movements set up by agents.
Surveillance
ALWAYS assume that you are under surveillance.
At this point, if you are NOT under surveillance, you are not a very good activist!
Scare Tactics
They use them.
Such tactics include slander, defamation, threats, getting close to disaffected or minimally committed fellow activists to persuade them (via psychological tactics described above) to turn against the movement and give false testimony against their former compatriots. They will plant illegal substances on the activist and set up an arrest; they will plant false information and set up "exposure," they will send incriminating letters [emails] in the name of the activist; and more; they will do whatever society will allow.
This booklet in no way covers all the ways agents use to sabotage the lives of sincere an dedicated activists.
If an agent is "exposed," he or she will be transferred or replaced.
COINTELPRO is still in operation today under a different code name. It is no longer placed on paper where it can be discovered through the freedom of information act.
The FBI counterintelligence program's stated purpose: To expose, disrupt, misdirect, discredit, and otherwise neutralize individuals who the FBI categorize as opposed to the National Interests. "National Security" means the FBI's security from the people ever finding out the vicious things it does in violation of people's civil liberties.
_______________________________________________________________________
Seventeen Techniques for Truth Suppression
Strong, credible allegations of high-level criminal activity can bring down a government. When the government lacks an effective, fact-based defense, other techniques must be employed. The success of these techniques depends heavily upon a cooperative, compliant press and a mere token opposition party.
1. Dummy up. If it's not reported, if it's not news, it didn't happen.
2. Wax indignant. This is also known as the "How dare you?" gambit.
3. Characterize the charges as "rumors" or, better yet, "wild rumors." If, in spite of the news blackout, the public is still able to learn about the suspicious facts, it can only be through "rumors." (If they tend to believe the "rumors" it must be because they are simply "paranoid" or "hysterical.")
4. Knock down straw men. Deal only with the weakest aspects of the weakest charges. Even better, create your own straw men. Make up wild rumors (or plant false stories) and give them lead play when you appear to debunk all the charges, real and fanciful alike.
5. Call the skeptics names like "conspiracy theorist," "nutcase," "ranter," "kook," "crackpot," and, of course, "rumor monger." Be sure, too, to use heavily loaded verbs and adjectives when characterizing their charges and defending the "more reasonable" government and its defenders. You must then carefully avoid fair and open debate with any of the people you have thus maligned. For insurance, set up your own "skeptics" to shoot down.
6. Impugn motives. Attempt to marginalize the critics by suggesting strongly that they are not really interested in the truth but are simply pursuing a partisan political agenda or are out to make money (compared to over-compensated adherents to the government line who, presumably, are not).
7. Invoke authority. Here the controlled press and the sham opposition can be very useful.
8. Dismiss the charges as "old news."
9. Come half-clean. This is also known as "confession and avoidance" or "taking the limited hangout route." This way, you create the impression of candor and honesty while you admit only to relatively harmless, less-than-criminal "mistakes." This stratagem often requires the embrace of a fall-back position quite different from the one originally taken. With effective damage control, the fall-back position need only be peddled by stooge skeptics to carefully limited markets.
10. Characterize the crimes as impossibly complex and the truth as ultimately unknowable.
11. Reason backward, using the deductive method with a vengeance. With thoroughly rigorous deduction, troublesome evidence is irrelevant. E.g. We have a completely free press. If evidence exists that the Vince Foster "suicide" note was forged, they would have reported it. They haven't reported it so there is no such evidence. Another variation on this theme involves the likelihood of a conspiracy leaker and a press who would report the leak.
12. Require the skeptics to solve the crime completely. E.g. If Foster was murdered, who did it and why?
13. Change the subject. This technique includes creating and/or publicizing distractions.
14. Lightly report incriminating facts, and then make nothing of them. This is sometimes referred to as "bump and run" reporting.
15. Baldly and brazenly lie. A favorite way of doing this is to attribute the "facts" furnished the public to a plausible-sounding, but anonymous, source.
16. Expanding further on numbers 4 and 5, have your own stooges "expose" scandals and champion popular causes. Their job is to pre-empt real opponents and to play 99-yard football. A variation is to pay rich people for the job who will pretend to spend their own money.
17. Flood the Internet with agents. This is the answer to the question, "What could possibly motivate a person to spend hour upon hour on Internet news groups defending the government and/or the press and harassing genuine critics?" Don t the authorities have defenders enough in all the newspapers, magazines, radio, and television? One would think refusing to print critical letters and screening out serious callers or dumping them from radio talk shows would be control enough, but, obviously, it is not.

The top 5 members of the show will debut as a group, receive 200 million won, release an album, hold a national tour and a global showcase.
The episode is currently available for international fans on Viki.
Voting for the top 5 is ongoing. In Korea you can vote for your top 5 picks once a day on Naver or JTBC's website, international fans will have to vote through MAKESTAR app (available in 239 countries).
Preliminary Audience Online Vote Ranking (Episode 6):

1. Lee Sooyoung (Global + Korea)
2. Lee Nayoung (Global + Korea)
3. Hwang Seyoung (Global + Korea)
4. Kim Yebin (Global + Korea)
5. Cho Yein (Global) / Yang Drea Irae (Korea)
6. Yang Drea Irae (Global) / Kang Yunjeong (Korea)
7. Kang Yunjeong (Global) / Cho Yein (Korea)
8. Khan Amina (Global) / Lee Arumsoul (Korea)
9. Yoon Minseo (Global) / Khan Amina (Korea)
10. Lee Arumsoul (Global) / Yoon Minseo (Korea)

Round Three - Rival Death Match
The surviving 24 contestants will go on a 1 vs 1 death match, 12 matches in total for this round. After the rivals perform, the producers will score each contestant out of 100 to determine the match's winner.
This will be the last individual round, the next round will be 'playoffs' which will consist of group missions to determine who goes to the final.
The 9 winners of round 2 (Khan Amina, Yoon Minseo, nov, Kang Yunjeong, Hwang Seyoung, Lee Arumsoul, Choi Aim, Yang Irae and Sohn Yujin) chose their rivals first.
The producers chose the 3 MVPs of round 2 who will choose first among the 9 winners: Lee Arumsoul, Kang Yunjeong and Khan Amina.

Match	Performance	Result
Khan Amina vs Yang Drea Irae	Like an Indian Doll (orig. Nami)	Yang Drea Irae 538 vs Khan Amina 514
Yoon Minseo vs Kim Kyuri	Love wins all (orig. IU)	Kim Kyuri 548 vs Yoon Minseo 541
Cho Yein vs Janet Suhh	Make Up (orig. Sam Kim feat. Crush)	Cho Yein 530 vs Janet Suhh 490
Lee Arumsoul vs Lee Nayoung	Sixth Sense (orig. Brown Eyed Girls)	Lee Nayoung 570 vs Lee Arumsoul 563
Kim Hana vs Chong Jeena	Flower Way (orig. Kim Sejeong)	Kim Hana 519 vs Chong Jeena 509
Son Yeongseo vs Jung Yuri	Love Lee (orig. AKMU) *To be released in episode 7	To be released in episode 7

My bf was a virgin when we met. We worked together and we fell in love and he moved in with me. I have 3 children from my past relationship. When covid hit, I had to stay at home taking care of the kids and basically homeschool them for 3 years. And now they continue to do online school. I found a work from home job. He does doordash and Uber. He used to work non-stop and made decent money doing it. But for the past year, he has completely slowed down. He will work just a few hours here and there, not even making enough for the month to cover his share of bills he pays. His share is $800. I cover everything else, literally everything. He also uses my car while his truck sits parked with barely 50k miles. He says he's sick of doing doordash. I told him to find a part-time job since the minimum wage is nearly $20. My father has offered him a career where he works, which is the equivalent to Boeing. No exp is needed, and he will just give him whatever type of work he wants to try and whatever shift or schedule. He says he doesn't want to work. He thinks it's not fair that he has to work his ass off all day and be broke. And that he can't just make passive income.
I'm tired of taking care of the entire house and work and being busy with the kids and coaching, etc, but I do it. He stays up all night playing on his PC. He will go to bed when I'm getting up in the morning. Our bedroom is so messy that I refuse to go sleep in there at night. He says he won't work because I won't do what he expects of me. Come to bed at night and have sex. I told him I would if he kept the room clean and if he would go to work and came out of the room to spend time with me and as a family. He said I could just as easily come into the room during the day if I want to see him.
He used to love going and doing things together. But now he just doesn't ever feel like going and doing anything. His attitude is negative he has excuses for everything, and on the rare occasion he comes out, he seems miserable. I don't know what went wrong or how to fix this. Every time I try to work this out and we talk and agree to do this or that, he still continues to do what he does. He says he has zero motivation to work or do things if we are upset or if I don't come to the bedroom at night. We talk, and I'll hold up my word while he never holds up his..this is the first time i haven't just gone along with it. I dont want to sleep in my room when theres dirty dishes and trash, im done taking care of him like a mother. I'm not sure if he's unhappy and wants to break up but doesn't want to do that bc of the relationship he has with the kids or the relationship I have with his mother, we are very close and she sees my kids as her grand children. I don't know if he's just in a rut or depressed what do I do?
TL;DR My bf 26M (Im 37F) is super unmotivated and just seems extremely u happy. What do you think I should do? Do we need counseling?

Everything in my inventory is up for trade. The most valuable items are listed here, the rest you can find in My Inventory

Feel free to Add Me or even better send a Trade Offer. Open for any suggestions: upgrades, downgrades / knives, gloves, skins / stickers, patterns, floats.

All Buyouts are listed in cash value.

KNIVES

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★ Gut Knife Gamma Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $286.17

★ Gut Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $246.55

★ Gut Knife Marble Fade (Factory New), B/O: $240.77

★ Gut Knife, B/O: $210.49

★ Gut Knife Lore (Field-Tested), B/O: $194.22

★ Gut Knife Case Hardened (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $151.51

★ Gut Knife Blue Steel (Minimal Wear), B/O: $124.94

★ Gut Knife Rust Coat (Well-Worn), B/O: $118.99

★ Gut Knife Boreal Forest (Minimal Wear), B/O: $109.80

★ StatTrak™ Gut Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $237.96

⎯

★ Shadow Daggers Gamma Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $264.92

★ Shadow Daggers Marble Fade (Factory New), B/O: $253.03

★ Shadow Daggers Tiger Tooth (Factory New), B/O: $237.22

★ Shadow Daggers Crimson Web (Field-Tested), B/O: $153.40

★ Shadow Daggers Autotronic (Minimal Wear), B/O: $144.42

★ Shadow Daggers Blue Steel (Field-Tested), B/O: $105.20

★ StatTrak™ Shadow Daggers Damascus Steel (Minimal Wear), B/O: $150.46

⎯

★ Navaja Knife Fade (Factory New), B/O: $365.99

★ Navaja Knife Doppler (Factory New), B/O: $228.93

★ Navaja Knife Marble Fade (Factory New), B/O: $227.43

★ Navaja Knife Slaughter (Factory New), B/O: $209.06

★ Navaja Knife, B/O: $203.16

★ Navaja Knife Case Hardened (Well-Worn), B/O: $132.57

★ Navaja Knife Damascus Steel (Factory New), B/O: $121.69

★ Navaja Knife Damascus Steel (Minimal Wear), B/O: $109.95

★ Navaja Knife Damascus Steel (Field-Tested), B/O: $100.41

★ StatTrak™ Navaja Knife Fade (Factory New), B/O: $369.01

★ StatTrak™ Navaja Knife Damascus Steel (Field-Tested), B/O: $109.95

GLOVES

★ Sport Gloves Amphibious (Minimal Wear), B/O: $2394.67

★ Sport Gloves Omega (Well-Worn), B/O: $572.33

★ Sport Gloves Bronze Morph (Minimal Wear), B/O: $338.88

★ Sport Gloves Big Game (Field-Tested), B/O: $323.66

⎯

★ Specialist Gloves Marble Fade (Minimal Wear), B/O: $1652.07

★ Specialist Gloves Tiger Strike (Field-Tested), B/O: $599.14

★ Specialist Gloves Crimson Web (Well-Worn), B/O: $231.57

★ Specialist Gloves Buckshot (Minimal Wear), B/O: $126.21

⎯

★ Moto Gloves POW! (Minimal Wear), B/O: $996.99

★ Moto Gloves POW! (Field-Tested), B/O: $383.31

★ Moto Gloves POW! (Well-Worn), B/O: $276.00

★ Moto Gloves Turtle (Field-Tested), B/O: $180.28

⎯

★ Hand Wraps CAUTION! (Minimal Wear), B/O: $502.29

★ Hand Wraps Giraffe (Minimal Wear), B/O: $180.73

★ Hand Wraps CAUTION! (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $178.32

⎯

★ Driver Gloves Queen Jaguar (Minimal Wear), B/O: $181.01

★ Driver Gloves Rezan the Red (Field-Tested), B/O: $101.66

⎯

★ Broken Fang Gloves Jade (Field-Tested), B/O: $127.88

★ Broken Fang Gloves Needle Point (Minimal Wear), B/O: $124.55

⎯

★ Bloodhound Gloves Guerrilla (Minimal Wear), B/O: $127.94

★ Hydra Gloves Case Hardened (Field-Tested), B/O: $102.55

WEAPONS

AK-47 X-Ray (Well-Worn), B/O: $478.95

AUG Hot Rod (Factory New), B/O: $425.83

StatTrak™ M4A1-S Hyper Beast (Factory New), B/O: $413.95

M4A4 Daybreak (Factory New), B/O: $309.51

StatTrak™ AK-47 Aquamarine Revenge (Factory New), B/O: $305.43

AK-47 Case Hardened (Well-Worn), B/O: $196.38

StatTrak™ M4A4 Temukau (Minimal Wear), B/O: $174.64

P90 Run and Hide (Field-Tested), B/O: $167.03

AWP Asiimov (Field-Tested), B/O: $153.33

Souvenir SSG 08 Death Strike (Minimal Wear), B/O: $140.00

M4A1-S Printstream (Battle-Scarred), B/O: $124.70

StatTrak™ M4A1-S Golden Coil (Field-Tested), B/O: $117.48

AWP Asiimov (Well-Worn), B/O: $115.97

StatTrak™ Desert Eagle Printstream (Minimal Wear), B/O: $112.96

StatTrak™ AK-47 Asiimov (Minimal Wear), B/O: $110.85

Souvenir M4A1-S Master Piece (Well-Worn), B/O: $102.42

AK-47 Bloodsport (Minimal Wear), B/O: $100.53

Trade Offer Link - Steam Profile Link - My Inventory

Knives - Bowie Knife, Butterfly Knife, Falchion Knife, Flip Knife, Gut Knife, Huntsman Knife, M9 Bayonet, Bayonet, Karambit, Shadow Daggers, Stiletto Knife, Ursus Knife, Navaja Knife, Talon Knife, Classic Knife, Paracord Knife, Survival Knife, Nomad Knife, Skeleton Knife, Patterns - Gamma Doppler, Doppler (Phase 1, Phase 2, Phase 3, Phase 4, Black Pearl, Sapphire, Ruby, Emerald), Crimson Web, Lore, Fade, Ultraviolet, Night, Marble Fade (Fire & Ice, Fake FI), Case Hardened (Blue Gem), Autotronic, Slaughter, Black Laminate, Tiger Tooth, Boreal Forest, Scorched, Blue Steel, Vanilla, Damascus Steel, Forest DDPAT, Urban Masked, Freehand, Stained, Bright Water, Safari Mesh, Rust Coat, Gloves - Bloodhound Gloves (Charred, Snakebite, Guerrilla, Bronzed), Driver Gloves (Snow Leopard, King Snake, Crimson Weave, Imperial Plaid, Black Tie, Lunar Weave, Diamondback, Rezan the Red, Overtake, Queen Jaguar, Convoy, Racing Green), Hand Wraps (Cobalt Skulls, CAUTION!, Overprint, Slaughter, Leather, Giraffe, Badlands, Spruce DDPAT, Arboreal, Constrictor, Desert Shamagh, Duct Tape), Moto Gloves (Spearmint, POW!, Cool Mint, Smoke Out, Finish Line, Polygon, Blood Pressure, Turtle, Boom!, Eclipse, 3rd Commando Company, Transport), Specialist Gloves (Crimson Kimono, Tiger Strike, Emerald Web, Field Agent, Marble Fade, Fade, Foundation, Lt. Commander, Crimson Web, Mogul, Forest DDPAT, Buckshot), Sport Gloves (Pandora's Box, Superconductor, Hedge Maze, Vice, Amphibious, Slingshot, Omega, Arid, Big Game, Nocts, Scarlet Shamagh, Bronze Morph), Hydra Gloves (Case Hardened, Emerald, Rattler, Mangrove), Broken Fang Gloves (Jade, Yellow-banded, Unhinged, Needle Point), Pistols - P2000 (Wicked Sick, Ocean Foam, Fire Element, Amber Fade, Corticera, Chainmail, Imperial Dragon, Obsidian, Scorpion, Handgun, Acid Etched), USP-S (Printstream, Kill Confirmed, Whiteout, Road Rash, Owergrowth, The Traitor, Neo-Noir, Dark Water, Orion, Blueprint, Stainless, Caiman, Serum, Monster Mashup, Royal Blue, Ancient Visions, Cortex, Orange Anolis, Ticket To Hell, Black Lotus, Cyrex, Check Engine, Guardian, Purple DDPAT, Torque, Blood Tiger, Flashback, Business Class, Pathfinder, Para Green), Lead Conduit, Glock-18 (Ramese's Reach, Umbral Rabbit, Fade, Candy Apple, Bullet Queen, Synth Leaf, Neo-Noir, Nuclear Garden, Dragon Tatto, Reactor, Pink DDPAT, Twilight Galaxy, Sand Dune, Groundwater, Blue Fissure, Snack Attack, Water Elemental, Brass, Wasteland Rebel, Vogue, Franklin, Royal Legion, Gamma Doppler, Weasel, Steel Disruption, Ironwork, Grinder, High Beam, Moonrise, Oxide Blaze, Bunsen Burner, Clear Polymer, Bunsen Burner, Night), P250 (Apep's Curse, Re.built, Nuclear Threat, Modern Hunter, Splash, Whiteout, Vino Primo, Mehndi, Asiimov, Visions, Undertow, Cartel, See Ya Later, Gunsmoke, Splash, Digital Architect, Muertos, Red Rock, Bengal Tiger, Crimson Kimono, Wingshot, Metallic DDPAT, Hive, Dark Filigree, Mint Kimono), Five-Seven (Neon Kimono, Berries And Cherries, Fall Hazard, Crimson Blossom, Hyper Beast, Nitro, Fairy Tale, Case Hardened, Copper Galaxy, Angry Mob, Monkey Business, Fowl Play, Anodized Gunmetal, Hot Shot, Retrobution, Boost Protocol), CZ75-Auto (Chalice, Crimson Web, Emerald Quartz, The Fuschia is Now, Nitro, Xiangliu, Yellow Jacket, Victoria, Poison Dart, Syndicate, Eco, Hexane, Pole, Tigris), Tec-9 (Mummy's Rot, Rebel, Terrace, Nuclear Threat, Hades, Rust Leaf, Decimator, Blast From, Orange Murano, Toxic, Fuel Injector, Remote Control, Bamboo Forest, Isaac, Avalanche, Brother, Re-Entry, Blue Titanium, Bamboozle), R8 Revolver (Banana Cannon, Fade, Blaze, Crimson Web, Liama Cannon, Crazy 8, Reboot, Canal Spray, Night, Amber Fade), Desert Eagle (Blaze, Hand Cannon, Fennec Fox, Sunset Storm, Emerald Jörmungandr, Pilot, Hypnotic, Golden Koi, Printstream, Cobalt Disruption, Code Red, Ocean Drive, Midnight Storm, Kumicho Dragon, Crimson Web, Heirloom, Night Heist, Mecha Industries, Night, Conspiracy, Trigger Discipline, Naga, Directive, Light Rail), Dual Berettas (Flora Carnivora, Duelist, Cobra Strike, Black Limba, Emerald, Hemoglobin, Twin Turbo, Marina, Melondrama, Pyre, Retribution, Briar, Dezastre, Royal Consorts, Urban Shock, Dualing Dragons, Panther, Balance), Rifles - Galil (Aqua Terrace, Winter Forest, Chatterbox, Sugar Rush, Pheonix Blacklight, CAUTION!, Orange DDPAT, Cerberus, Dusk Ruins, Eco, Chromatic Aberration, Stone Cold, Tuxedo, Sandstorm, Shattered, Urban Rubble, Rocket Pop, Kami, Crimson Tsunami, Connexion), SCAR-20 (Fragments, Brass, Cyrex, Palm, Splash Jam, Cardiac, Emerald, Crimson Web, Magna Carta, Stone Mosaico, Bloodsport, Enforcer), AWP (Black Nile, Duality, Gungnir, Dragon Lore, Prince, Medusa, Desert Hydra, Fade, Lightning Strike, Oni Taiji, Silk Tiger, Graphite, Chromatic Aberration, Asiimov, Snake Camo, Boom, Containment Breach, Wildfire, Redline, Electric Hive, Hyper Beast, Neo-Noir, Man-o'-war, Pink DDPAT, Corticera, Sun in Leo, Elite Build, Fever Dream, Atheris, Mortis, PAW, Exoskeleton, Worm God, POP AWP, Phobos, Acheron, Pit Viper, Capillary, Safari Mesh), AK-47 (Steel Delta, Head Shot, Wild Lotus, Gold Arabesque, X-Ray, Fire Serpent, Hydroponic, Panthera Onca, Case Hardened, Vulcan, Jet Set, Fuel Injector, Bloodsport, Nightwish, First Class, Neon Rider, Asiimov, Red Laminate, Aquamarine Revenge, The Empress, Wasteland Rebel, Jaguar, Black Laminate, Leet Museo, Neon Revolution, Redline, Frontside Misty, Predator, Legion of Anubis, Point Disarray, Orbit Mk01, Blue Laminate, Green Laminate, Emerald Pinstripe, Cartel, Phantom Disruptor, Jungle Spray, Safety Net, Rat Rod, Baroque Purple, Slate, Elite Build, Uncharted, Safari Mesh), FAMAS (Waters of Nephthys, Sundown, Prime Conspiracy, Afterimage, Commemoration, Dark Water, Spitfire, Pulse, Eye of Athena, Meltdown, Rapid Eye Move, Roll Cage, Styx, Mecha Industrie, Djinn, ZX Spectron, Valence, Neural Net, Night Borre, Hexne), M4A4 (Eye of Horus, Temukau, Howl, Poseidon, Asiimov, Daybreak, Hellfire, Zirka, Red DDPAT, Radiation Hazard, Modern Hunter, The Emperor, The Coalition, Bullet Rain, Cyber Security, X-Ray, Dark Blossom, Buzz Kill, In Living Color, Neo-Noir, Desolate Space, 龍王 (Dragon King), Royal Paladin, The Battlestar, Global Offensive, Tooth Fairy, Desert-Strike, Griffin, Evil Daimyo, Spider Lily, Converter), M4A1-S (Emphorosaur-S, Welcome to the Jungle, Imminent Danger, Knight, Hot Rod, Icarus Fell, Blue Phosphor, Printstream, Master Piece, Dark Water, Golden Coil, Bright Water, Player Two, Atomic Alloy, Guardian, Chantico's Fire, Hyper Beast, Mecha Industries, Cyrex, Control Panel, Moss Quartz, Nightmare, Decimator, Leaded Glass, Basilisk, Blood Tiger, Briefing, Night Terror, Nitro, VariCamo, Flashback), SG 553 (Cyberforce, Hazard Pay, Bulldozer, Integrale, Dragon Tech, Ultraviolet, Colony IV, Hypnotic, Cyrex, Candy Apple, Barricade, Pulse), SSG 08 (Death Strike, Sea Calico, Blood in the Water, Orange Filigree, Dragonfire, Big Iron, Bloodshot, Detour, Turbo Peek, Red Stone), AUG (Akihabara Accept, Flame Jörmungandr, Hot Rod, Midnight Lily, Sand Storm, Carved Jade, Wings, Anodized Navy, Death by Puppy, Torque, Bengal Tiger, Chameleon, Fleet Flock, Random Access, Momentum, Syd Mead, Stymphalian, Arctic Wolf, Aristocrat, Navy Murano), G3SG1 (Chronos, Violet Murano, Flux, Demeter, Orange Kimono, The Executioner, Green Apple, Arctic Polar Camo, Contractor), SMGs - P90 (ScaraB Rush, Neoqueen, Astral Jörmungandr, Run and Hide, Emerald Dragon, Cold Blooded, Death by Kitty, Baroque Red, Vent Rush, Blind Spot, Asiimov, Trigon, Sunset Lily, Death Grip, Leather, Nostalgia, Fallout Warning, Tiger Pit, Schermatic, Virus, Shapewood, Glacier Mesh, Shallow Grave, Chopper, Desert Warfare), MAC-10 (Sakkaku, Hot Snakes, Copper Borre, Red Filigree, Gold Brick, Graven, Case Hardened, Stalker, Amber Fade, Neon Rider, Tatter, Curse, Propaganda, Nuclear Garden, Disco Tech, Toybox, Heat, Indigo), UMP-45 (Wild Child, Fade, Blaze, Day Lily, Minotaur's Labyrinth, Crime Scene, Caramel, Bone Pile, Momentum, Primal Saber), MP7 (Teal Blossom, Fade, Nemesis, Whiteout, Asterion, Bloosport, Abyssal Apparition, Full Stop, Special Delivery, Neon Ply, Asterion, Ocean Foam, Powercore, Scorched, Impire), PP-Bizon (Modern Hunter, Rust Coat, Forest Leaves, Antique, High Roller, Blue Streak, Seabird, Judgement of Anubis, Bamboo Print, Embargo, Chemical Green, Coblat Halftone, Fuel Rod, Photic Zone, Irradiated Alert, Carbon Fiber), MP9 (Featherweight, Wild Lily, Pandora's Box, Stained Glass, Bulldozer, Dark Age, Hot Rod, Hypnotic, Hydra, Rose Iron, Music Box, Setting Sun, Food Chain, Airlock, Mount Fuji, Starlight Protector, Ruby Poison Dart, Deadly Poison), MP5-SD (Liquidation, Oxide Oasis, Phosphor, Nitro, Agent, Autumn Twilly), Shotguns, Machineguns - Sawed-Off (Kiss♥Love, First Class, Orange DDPAT, Rust Coat, The Kraken, Devourer, Mosaico, Wasteland Princess, Bamboo Shadow, Copper, Serenity, Limelight, Apocalypto), XM1014 (Frost Borre, Ancient Lore, Red Leather, Elegant Vines, Banana Leaf, Jungle, Urban Perforated, Grassland, Blaze Orange, Heaven Guard, VariCamo Blue, Entombed, XOXO, Seasons, Tranquility, Bone Machine, Incinegator, Teclu Burner, Black Tie, Zombie Offensive, Watchdog), Nova (Sobek's Bite, Baroque Orange, Hyper Beast, Green Apple, Antique, Modern Hunter, Walnut, Forest Leaves, Graphite, Blaze Orange, Rising Skull, Tempest, Bloomstick, Interlock, Quick Sand, Moon in Libra, Clean Polymer, Red Quartz, Toy Soldier), MAG-7 (Copper Coated, Insomnia, Cinqueda, Counter Terrace, Prism Terrace, Memento, Chainmail, Hazard, Justice, Bulldozer, Silver, Core Breach, Firestarter, Praetorian, Heat, Hard Water, Monster Call, BI83 Spectrum, SWAG-7), M249 (Humidor, Shipping Forecast, Blizzard Marbleized, Downtown, Jungle DDPAT, Nebula Crusader, Impact Drill, Emerald Poison Dart), Negev (Mjölnir, Anodized Navy, Palm, Power Loader, Bratatat, CaliCamo, Phoenix Stencil, Infrastructure, Boroque Sand), Wear - Factory New (FN), Minimal Wear (MW), Field-Tested (FT), Well-Worn (WW), Battle-Scarred (BS), Stickers Holo/Foil/Gold - Katowice 2014, Krakow 2017, Howling Dawn, Katowice 2015, Crown, London 2018, Cologne 2014, Boston 2018, Atlanta 2017, Cluj-Napoca 2015, DreamHack 2014, King on the Field, Harp of War, Winged Difuser, Cologne 2016, Cologne 2015, MLG Columbus 2016, Katowice 2019, Berlin 2019, RMR 2020, Stockholm 2021, Antwerp 2022, Paris 2023, Swag Foil, Flammable foil, Others - Souvenirs, Agents, Pins, Passes, Gifts, Music Kits, Cases, Keys, Capsules, Packages, Patches

Some items on the list may no longer be available or are still locked, visit My Inventory for more details.

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A little over a year ago, I decided I wanted to read Guy Gavriel Kay for the first time. I don’t know why I knew it was the right time, I just did. I had been aware of Kay’s work basically since I began reading Fantasy, probably at least a dozen years ago now, and I had always planned to read him eventually.
For some reason, however, it just felt like it was time. I’m so glad I did.
So, after reading all fifteen novels (in publication order) over about 13 months, here are my spoiler-free (some small spoilers will be covered) thoughts on each one. If you are a GGK fan, I would love to hear your thoughts and favorites as well.
And if you’ve never read him before, I hope you will take the leap!

• The Fionavar Tapestry (1984-1986): The first thing to know about these three novels (The Summer Tree, The Wandering Fire, and The Darkest Road) is that they are not very representative of the rest of Kay’s work, which is mostly Historical Fantasy. Fionavar, however, is 100% High Portal Fantasy. It tells the story of five Canadian graduate students who are transported into a fantasy world and tasked with saving it. Many readers like to compare the series to Tolkien (largely because a young GGK famously interned with Christopher Tolkien) but I disagree. It is much more 'Narnia meets A Song of Ice and Fire'. Beautifully written, but also containing quite a lot of adult content, politics, and a heavy dose of mythology. I enjoyed it quite a bit, but if you don’t like it that does not mean you won’t like other Kay books.
• Tigana (1990): Perhaps Kay’s most famous and well-regarded novel, and also the first time he began tinkering with his now well-known style of writing a history-adjacent story. Tigana is set in a place very reminiscent of medieval Italy, where two sorcerers are battling over both the land and the hearts of the people who live there. While the writing is a step up from Fionavar, I did find it a touch over-dramatic at times, with characters that are not all as fleshed out as I would like. Where the book excels, however, is in its themes - Memory, Loss, Colonialism vs Patriotism, and more. It's fascinating and well worth your time.
• A Song for Arbonne (1992): Shifting from Kay’s most well-known novel, we now have probably his most underrated and under-discussed. A Song for Arbonne is set in a fictional version of Provence, France during the high Middle Ages and follows a feud between two dukes and two very different ways of life. This is a beautifully feminist novel (especially for 1992) and also made me love troubadours, which is not something I ever thought I would say. Highly recommended, especially in audiobook.
• The Lions of Al-Rassan (1995): My favorite Kay novel, and one I will unabashedly gush about for the rest of my life. Set in a fictional version of Spain during the Crusades, we follow three characters – a Kindath (Jewish) woman doctor, a Jaddite (Christian) military leader, and an Asharite (Muslim) Poet/Diplomat. These three very different people from very different backgrounds are thrust together amid absolute turmoil and form a bond that defies and transcends cultures. It absolutely broke my heart when I read it, but somehow also made me as hopeful as any book I had ever read before. This book is perfect. Read it.
• The Sarantine Mosaic (1998-2000): This two-part story is set in the same world as The Lions of Al-Rassan, but many centuries earlier and hundreds of miles to the east. We follow a young mosaicist named Crispin who is unexpectedly pulled from his obscure country life and tasked with traveling to Sarantium, the greatest city on Earth, to build a new cathedral for the Emperor. Along the way, he meets many incredible side characters and witnesses the empire experience huge amounts of change. This is another favorite, and is far and away Kay’s most epic story. If you like Gladiator or Spartacus, you’ll love this. Plus it has chariot races!
• The Last Light of the Sun (2004): A Viking novel set in the same world as the last two. Shares many of the same themes and ideas of the previous novels as well – people from different cultures coming face to face with modernity and changing times. It’s a very good novel, especially if you enjoy Vikings, but a step down for me.
• Ysabel (2007): Probably far and away Kay's most unique book. It’s a modern, YA novel set in Provence. We follow a young teenage Canadian boy who goes on a work trip with his photographer father and gets swept up into a mystery involving some of the artifacts and other historical sites there. This book is also loosely connected to Fionavar. I enjoyed this one more than I thought I would, but it was still a bizarre experience compared to literally everything else Kay has written.
• Under Heaven (2010): Kay now turned his sights to ancient Chinese history, specifically 8th Century Tang Dynasty. Like his other stuff, though, this is not actually historical fiction - it's set in another world with different names, etc. The son of a renowned general is given 250 prized horses as a gift for his work burying the dead from both sides of a large battle. This outlandish gift forces the young man to become embroiled in the politics of the empire and allows him to witness a startling change to his people's way of life. Lots of people LOVE this book - many even list it as their favorite of Kay's. It did not resonate with me the same way. It's very good! But not my favorite.
• River of Stars (2012): A pseudo-sequel to Under Heaven, set about 500 years later in an era largely defined by the events of that previous novel. Whereas in Under Heaven Kitai (Kay's version of China) was an up-and-coming military power, in River of Stars it has become a wealthy, arrogant cultural hub that is seemingly unaware of its instability. We follow quite a few different characters from multiple backgrounds in this one and, like so many Kay stories, get to see large events take place through the eyes of these 'small' characters. I imagine that whatever your feelings were/are for Under Heaven, you will feel mostly the same about River of Stars.
• Children of Earth and Sky (2016): Kay returned to his 'Jaddite' world for the first time since 2004 for this novel, and (for this reader at least), it was a joy! It takes place about 1,000 years after the Sarantine Mosaic, in a world where the great city of Sarantium has fallen to the Asharites and the surrounding world is trying to pick up the pieces. It's a time of a lot of upheaval and turmoil. This novel follows quite a few very diverse POV characters, which (while sometimes confusing) gives it an 'epic' feel. We have artists, traders, military leaders, sea captains, pirates, and more. While I would not necessarily suggest this as your first GGK novel, if you are a fan of the Sarantine Mosaic (and to a lesser extent, The Lions of Al-Rassan), you will find MUCH to love here.
• A Brightness Long Ago (2019): Taking place about 25 years before the events of Children of Earth and Sky, A Brightness Long Ago perfects Kay's most notable theme: The effect that small, 'unimportant' people can have on huge, global events. We follow a young man named Guidanio, the son of a common tailor, who is swept up into a local feud between two legendary mercenary captains. In the process, he falls in love, faces unspeakable tragedy, and eventually witnesses the fall of the greatest city on earth. What sets this book apart from other Kay novels is that it is mostly told in 1st Person POV by a much older Guidanio in the form of his life story. It is one of Kay's most intimate and best-paced books, and although I still don't think it matches his peak, A Brightness Long Ago is certainly his best novel of the 20th Century and proof that he is still a master of his craft. Highly recommended!
• All the Seas of the World (2022): Kay's most recent novel is both a sequel to A Brightness Long Ago, and a prequel to Children of Earth and Sky. As such, I will not go into a ton of detail but suffice it to say that if you enjoyed those two novels you will love this one. It's a separate story, but there is enough overlap and easter eggs to keep your attention. While I would not rate it higher than A Brightness Long Ago, it was once again a great read and certainly worth your time.

So there we have it! Fifteen novels in just over a year. I'm not sure binging his work is the best way to enjoy Kay, but I still had a great time and plan to reread many (if not all) of these books again someday.
Guy Gavriel Kay is a master, and his work should be cherished. I'm a fan for life!

A racing blockchain game that features Formula One racing set in a futuristic world. The game is developed by Gyros Studios and powered by Unreal and Unity engines. Currently in its Alpha version, R Games incorporates precise engineering, artificial intelligence, and a player-centric economic model. The game is available on both PC and mobile platforms.
GAMEPLAY
R Games introduces a racing universe where players can engage in different racing modes, each offering various challenges and rewards. The game's custom vehicle design feature allows for a personalized racing experience, enabling players to modify and upgrade their vehicles to suit their racing style.
Players can earn through diverse activities like developing content, competing in races, or even watching events within the game. The Alpha version of R Games is accessible to all, providing a sneak peek into its dynamic racing ecosystem. With the transition to the Beta version, the game will introduce NFTs as essential elements, including consumables and game assets like vehicles, which are pivotal for competing in races and unlocking the game's full potential.
At its core, R Games is a gaming platform. It provides an array of gaming modes, from the high-octane Formula R mode to challenging off-road truck adventures. The game allows players to create, interact, and trade in-game assets as NFTs, all enhanced by AI. This fusion of elements aims to deliver not only a deeply engaging gaming experience but also opportunities for players to earn through various in-game activities.
To start playing R Games, new players need to acquire NFTs, either from Initial NFT Offerings (INO) or the marketplace. Once equipped with the necessary NFTs, players can download the game, connect their wallets, and embark into the electrifying world of R Games racing, where strategy, skill, and speed are of the utmost importance.
Token Information
R Games is supported by its native token, RGAME, which plays a central role in the game's economy. Operating on both the BSC and Solana networks, RGAME facilitates in-game transactions, allowing players to buy upgrades, NFTs, and other essential items. As the governing token, it empowers the community, giving players a voice in the game's development and feature updates, ensuring a democratic and evolving gameplay experience.
Players can earn RGAME through various activities within the game, such as participating in races, tournaments, and weekly leaderboards, or by engaging in competitive matches. This economic model not only enhances the gaming experience but also provides a tangible reward system, encouraging continued engagement and community growth.
Website: https://r-games.tech/

It has to have a clear ending, so no NES Tetris crash screen/rebirth. Also, it's your pick on just beating the story vs 100%ing it. It also can't be because of online stuff, so no "hur hur this one's impossible to complete because the servers shut down 10 years ago"
I'm not a super adventrous gamer, but I'd have to say all three EA Skate games have their difficult parts, even if you have extrnsive knowledge on the games. I've still never 100%ed Skate 3 on hardcore mode.

Hi, all! 👋

Intro/Question:

Let me just start out by saying that I’ve been on here for a little while and have admired not only the persistence, dedication, and grit of the women on here, but also the kindness and support in comparison to other groups. I wish I could give/get hugs from you all because a lot of you seem like such wonderful people, and I could really use some of that kindness in my life at the moment.
Now, I guess I’ll get right into my reason for posting this: I’d love some advice/insight/thoughts from y’all on recommendations for my next steps in this career transition towards software development because I’ve been struggling for awhile with finding a FT or even PT role.
Throughout this time, my mental health has also declined greatly (while on this journey, I’ve actually started antidepressant medication for the first time ever because my mental health has exponentially decreased, and have also seen a few different therapists in the same span of time).

VERY brief overview of my journey thus far:

Early Education: Growing up in a predominantly white community outside the main city, I was put into ESL classes despite being born in the U.S. I'm Latina, and my parents--who knew little English at the time--agreed with everything the educators suggested. This meant I was often taken out of critical science and math classes to make time for ESL work. Despite being a straight-A student, I had to work harder than others, and I believe this was one reason why.About a year and a half ago, I was diagnosed with combined ADD/ADHD. As a kid, it often took me longer to complete my work. My parents noticed but assumed it was just the way I functioned. My mom often recounted how I needed a "million" breaks while doing homework, which often led to late nights. Despite these struggles, I managed to stay on top of my studies.
Undergrad Education (2015 - 2019): I am a first-gen college grad and earned a bachelors in biochem & environmental science summer 2019. I discovered computer science during my junior year of college (by then, it was too late to take more courses in CS let alone attempt to make a switch without staying an extra year, which my scholarships would not cover). After graduating college, I was still interested in learning more about CS, so I took an Introduction to Programming in C course at my local community college, and not only earned an A, but also thoroughly enjoyed the content.
Grad School (Spring 2022): Enrolled in an online Masters in CS at Case Western Reserve University for those without CS degrees with a $30,000 grant from the dept. Took Discrete Mathematics and Algorithms & Data Structures in Java (those of us w/o a CS degree had to pass these before being able to move into the rest of the program where we’d be merged with those who DID have CS degrees), but paused due to my younger brother's unexpected passing.
Bootcamp (Fall 2022): Received a full-ride scholarship to a bootcamp (1/15 out of 1200 applicants accepted) where I learned full-stack development with Python, JavaScript, SQL, Flask, AJAX, and React, among other technologies. Graduated December 2022.
Further Learning (Spring/Summer 2023): Accepted into Code the Dream’s React course, dedicating over 20 hours per week to mastering React all while volunteering to work on open-source projects.
Internship (Fall 2023 - Present): I was interning at an early-stage Ed Tech startup up until the end of April, contributing to building an app from the ground up. I Gained experience in code writing/reviewing, CI/CD methodology, technical communication, and working on a software development team along with other teams like the content team and design team.

Struggles/Thoughts:

I have been consistently applying for FT/PT roles, internships, etc. with nothing but maybe 4 interviews since graduating from my bootcamp. In addition, I’ve been tweaking my resume for jobs that I feel I could be a particularly good candidate for using Jobscan with no luck.
With regards to the startup, they’ve informed me that they do not have sufficient funding to bring me on. Furthermore, about a month after the internship contract officially ended, the other female intern (graduated from the same bootcamp, although different cohorts) at the startup also let me know that she was being brought on again for an extended contract, and asked if I was offered the same—to which I replied that no, I wasn’t. I guess she also has an associates in CS, which also helps and I am not mad at her for anything and support her and uplift her, but as you can imagine, I am a little disappointed (more in myself than anything, I guess). It just makes me feel a bit crushed. I made myself always available (even after hours), replied quickly, got along super well with everyone, got my tasks all done for the most part. ==> Towards the end, I was tasked with a particularly difficult task, and was able to get through a good chunk of a new game, but was not able to fully finish. During this period, I was also struggling to get ahold of my ADHD meds, but they seemed to be out of stock everywhere, so that also didn't help.

Next steps:

I’m debating whether I should just keep applying, find some other program (AS/BS/MS), or just stop this trajectory altogether (although, I REALLY hope that I won’t have to because it would probably break me 😔).
I know that my math skills probably aren’t on par with those of others in the field, and I know that I need to work on those as well, so if you have any suggestions for free resources for that/what I should focus on with regards to teaching myself these concepts I’d also really appreciate it. I'm currently taking the Harvard CS50 course for credit as well as a Mathematics for Machine Learning course on Coursera (they state that this is for people of all math levels).
I’ve learned a lot and am passionate about continuing to grow as a software engineedeveloper. Any advice on next steps, opportunities, etc. that you feel may be relevant would be greatly appreciated. Thank you SO much if you read this far! 🫶

I am at my lowest point.
From Ukraine, refugee in a European country, above middle-class family by European standards.
From being motivated as fuck for 2024 having around 10k$ in assets, mid relationship with my parents, good grades to finish the semester and a really good mindset, forgetting about how i feel about not being in a place i dont like to call home. I was addiction free except the average vape cigarette yadda yadda, i was making great money online, good in school and had a really good mood 80% of the time.
After the beginning of the second semester I went from doing that good to eventually starting to get myself in a shithole one step at a time (there were a lot of steps). I started gambling heavily, not an average one day bender but now all my money goes on it, of which I have almost none (2k$) left, completely quitting what I did to make money or study and having no motivation to restart. I had periods of alcoholism where I drank up to a bottle of jager in one day. Alone or at parties where I just left after an hour to go back home and rot. My grades are at a low low low!! I suck balls in school, play brawl stars in half the lessons etc. AND on top of all that I dabble in hard drugs which make me go geeked mode and I sit at my desk tweaking balls to not do the shit i have to do and not even think about it, not mega hard shit but light benzos that I mostly get off the dark web.
Worst of all of this is the gambling problem I have which is literally works like heroin on your brain. I'm fucked for life because i have a developping brain with 6 years of gambling addiction (xandemic type shit).
I get no joy from anything except those sources and long walks, which I still usually have a beer with but even without the beer I enjoy them cuz they feel like an escape.
I am writing this whole thing because opening up is the best thing as everyone tells me but I never do it because I really am embarrassed about this deep hole I dug myself into and am struggling to get out of. I am gonna give myself a "self diagnosis" of social anxiety due to me not talking to almost anyone new because i literally start shaking and make things really weird 99% of the time. I do not know where to vent except the few friends i had back in Ukraine who i am now disconnected with because of my mental health (my fault completely, i was a burden and yapped too much about my problems not taking in consideration theirs).
I have a huge exam coming up in 2 weeks and i have not been doing shit neither do i plan to because it really feels like i don't care. I literally want to rot and stop being a shame in this family of hard workers where in 2 generations my elders went from being dirt broke slavs to quite a good financial situation. I have no one in family who struggles/struggled with any addictions nor is that even talked about.
I feel really embarassed, am scared and ashamed to talk about these problems to anyone close with the fear of abandonement or losing the "close" people i have left. I do not know what there is left to do. I am stuck in the past, living in Ukraine, being 14 and playing video games on discord. That life is far gone now.
venting this heavy for the first time, am sweating while writing this, want to delete it all but after all if i post it, worst thing that can happen is that nothing changes.