Below you'll find information and links to help advocate for Reproductive Freedoms and Abortion care in Canada and emerging policy issues with the Reddit platform. This is a recurring post and will be periodically updated as needed. Feel free to post additional information and discussions in the comments.
Advocating for Abortion Care in Canada:

• There is a serious lack of Abortion Care options in Canada, particularly in the rural areas, and for those living on reserves, they have almost no access to Abortion care. People may have to travel more than 100km and across provincial lines to access abortion. Some have to travel by plane from their rural community to one with an abortion clinic or hospital. This puts an unfair financial and logistical burden on those that need to access abortion care. Provincial Health Insurance Plans do not cover travel costs related to receiving medical care.
• Because many provinces have few facilities that provide Abortion care, this places an unreasonable load on the clinics that do exist, forcing clients to look elsewhere for facilities with capacity to help them. In Alberta, there is one clinic for every 209,077 people who can become pregnant (number of assigned-at-birth females between the ages of 15-29). PEI, the Northwest Territories and the Yukon Territory each only have 1 Abortion care provider. Nunavut only has 2 abortion providers, and of those, only one offers medical abortion covered by the provincial health insurance plan. In fact, 9 (out of a total of 13) Canadian provinces and territories have five or fewer facililities offering abortion care in their entire province. And 10 Canadian provinces and territories have one or fewer (0) rural facililities offering abortion care.
• Some provinces, have more restrictive guidelines regarding abortion, limiting access to abortion care to those with a gestational period of less than 12 weeks (meaning, 12 weeks since the first day of your last period, not 12 weeks since you discovered you were pregnant or when you had sex). Many people who menstruate have irregular periods. Some people might only menstruate every 2 or 3 months, and might only discover that they are pregnant near the gestation limit of 12 weeks.
• Insurance coverage also limits access to abortions. Some provinces, like Nunavut, do not offer coverage for medical abortions unless they are prescribed and performed in a hospital. And being a rural province, there also happens to be only 1 hospital in Nunavut - Qikiqtani General Hospital in Iqualuit. New Brunswick will only cover abortion services in a hospital setting, which means that abortion medical care provided in clinics are not covered by their Provincial Health Insurance Plan.
• Sexual and reproductive health services are among the services that physicians, pharmacists and nurse practitioners are most frequently unwilling to provide on moral or religious grounds. People who have been harassed and/or attacked while visiting an Abortion clinic may experience stigma and/or discrimination from their peers, especially in smaller, rural communities where everyone knows one another. People refused care by health care professionals because of personal beliefs may experience stigma and/or discrimination, forcing them to travel outside of their community to receive the care they need. This can all be particularly daunting for young people or those with limited resources.
• Everyone in Canada is supposed to have equal rights to access health care, regardless of race, age, class, immigration status, gender expression, sexuality and ability. Nevertheless, anyone's right to seek abortion care can be be impacted by discrimination and bigotry, both systemic and as a result of individual prejudice on the part of service providers. Racism, xenophobia, classism, homophobia, transphobia, ableism, and ageism in Canada are all direct and intersecting barriers to accessing abortion. It is much more difficult for a person who doesn\u2019t speak English to access abortion services, despite the presence of a translator. Transpeople also experience discrimination at higher rates in reproductive health care settings. Providers may also lack the knowledge or training to provide trans-affirming abortion care and abortion services are typically housed within *women\u2019s* health care departments.
• Further compounding the issue of inequitable abortion access are unregulated crisis pregnancy centres (CPCs), which are anti-choice pregnancy centres that advertise in hospitals, doctor's offices, churches, schools and community centre. They deceive people coming to them for options and advice by giving misinformation about abortion or by insisting on options that may delay or interfere with the clients ability to access the care they need. CPCs far outnumber abortion care providers in Canada. In Ontario alone, there are 77 active CPCs but only 38 abortion care providers. Overall, in Canada, there are 165 known CPCs compared to 147 abortion care providers (as of August 2022).

Reference: Policy Options, via the Institute for Research on Public Policy and Action Canada for Sexual Health & Rights
What can you do to improve access to abortion care in Canada?

1. Listen, research and learn. This is always the first step to understand any problem.
2. Send a letter to your MP and MPP. Tell them that access to abortion care is important and how difficult it can be to access it in your province. Urge them to prevent anti-choice groups and CPCs from receiving charitable status, and to revoke the charitable status from CPCs that already have it. Encourage them to include reasonable reimbursement for travel costs related to receiving medical care when it is not available in your community. And push them to pass Safe Access Zone Legislation to protect patients, practitioners and their staff from anti-choice harassment and intimidation.
3. Give a donation to a pro-choice charitable organization of your choice. Remember, if you give a total of $201 CDN or more to Canadian charitable organizations, you'll get a credit of 29% of your total annual donations on your income taxes (for those that file Canadian Income Taxes, only).
4. Sign up for the Abortion Rights Coalition of Canada Newsletter. https://www.arcc-cdac.ca/
5. Participate in local marches and rallys in support of access to abortion care.
6. Spread the Word. Tell your friends and family. Encourage them to research, listen and learn. Encourage them to contact their MPP and MPs.
7. If you work in a Doctor's office or as a family physician, consider incorporating Mifegymiso into your practice to ensure patients have timely access to this essential service. If you are a Doctor, or studying to be one, consider opening an Abortion Care practice when you are licensed and qualified to do so, especially in rural areas where there are a lack of options.
8. If you work in politics, consider proposing legislation that will ensure safe access zones for abortion care providers and their clients and covering reasonable travel costs for constituents when medical care is not available in their community.
9. If you are a journalist or work in media, consider preparing pieces sharing the difficulty Canadians can have accessing medical care such as abortions.
10. If you work in the area of Not For Profit/Advocacy, consider partnering with a Pro-choice organization and helping them spread information and lobby for improving access to abortion care for Canadians.
11. If you know someone who needs abortion care, consider giving them a ride to a clinic, helping them access the advice and care they need, and provide non-judgemental support.
12. Ensure persons of First Nations, Metis and Inuit heritage know about Jordan's Principle, which ensures that First Nations children (which includes people who can become pregnant under the age of 18) can access the products, services and supports they need, when they need them. https://www.sac-isc.gc.ca/eng/1568396042341/1568396159824

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Emerging Policy Issues with Reddit
On July 1, 2023, Reddit raised the price to make calls to their API from being free to a level that killed every third party app on Reddit, from Apollo to Reddit is Fun to Narwhal to BaconReader. This policy change meant that mobile users would have a lesser experience browsing Reddit, users with visual difficulties could not browse reddit as screenreaders are not compatible with the official Reddit app, and mods lost tools that they depend on to keep communities on-topic and spam-free. Many subreddits protested this change in June 2023, and the Reddit admins enforced draconian measures such as removing and replacing mods who privatized their subreddits in protest of this policy change.
On September 12, 2023, Reddit will eliminate reddit coins, including removing all accumulated coins, a perk that Reddit Premium users pay for every month. Coins are used to reward comments and posts by showing your appreciation for the effort. Some reddit coins offer the ability to use reddit without ads.
In March 2024, Reddit had an IPO (Initial Public Offering), and the founder and current CEO, as well as the COO have sold $500,000 of their shares. How does this effect you? Reddit may face pressure to increase revenues to attract investors. This could lead to more ads or new monetization features. There could also be changes to the platform to attract a wider user base, such as bans and censorship on certain topics or words and control over content to appease more conservative shareholders or users.
What can you do to protest policy changes at Reddit?

1. Listen, research and learn. Check /modcoord for updates
2. Cancel your Reddit Premium membership
3. Participate in subreddit led protests
4. Look for other forums to patronize. We have a forum on Discord called Auntie Network Canada. Message the mods here for an invite link to the Discord group.
5. Complain. Message the mods of reddit.com, who are the admins of the site: message reddit: submit a support request: comment in relevant threads on reddit. Leave a negative review on their official iOS or Android app.

Hey everyone. I’m currently level 105, but I’d really like to get level 150 before Friday’s update drops. Considering it’s currently Tuesday night where I’m at right now, is this possible? And if so, how?
I played yesterday and after 4 hours of play, got from 102 to 105, so hopefully one of you shed some light on how one can achieve level ups way, way faster!

It's a lot. And it's nearly 2 years worth. I think given what's happened tonight, I want to get it off my chest. This is a throwaway for obvious reasons....
Partner was in some weird niche group on fb. The admin is a very good friend of his. He made friends with some of the people in the group and chats moved to DMs etc. The admin passed on the number of a woman in the group and they chatted (it later transpired the behaviour youre about to read about happened with multiple men in cluding admin friend). The woman is in a whole different country very far away. They exchanged gifts, talked/video called every day and pretty soon, he was relying on her heavily for emotional support. This happened behind my back. He pulled the old "you would never let me have female friends" chestnut.
Jan 2023, I got covid and a close family relatives health went downhill. My covid resulted in secondary chest infections, chest xrays, multiple tests for all sorts of things and a lot of time off work not being fit for much at all. It was a long recovery and it was all I could do to work and then collapse in a heap at the end of the day. My partner felt like he had the brunt of everything to do around the house (I was still doing a lot but appreciated him sorting food in the evening and never complained). I didnt realise it but he also felt incredibly lonely- he works a solitary job by choice and his work hours meant he was coming home as I was going to bed and I could hardly keep myself awake with the post viral fatigue to spend time with him. I did try, napping when I got back from work to try and be able to stay up later, but it probably wasn't enough and I dropped the ball I guess.
My sick relatives health declined further and they ended up in palliative care before passing in April. I was devastated and he supported me through it but things felt off, I could never quite put my finger on it but definitely off. I mean the fact he called me the other woman's name in bed twice should have been a big red flag but he played it down- jokimg that it was one of his many many girlfriends and he can't help what he does when he's asleep.
What happened shortly after the funeral (2 weeks maybe) was that I came home from an errand and found partner on a video call with this woman. It was awkward AF. He asked me what I was doing home, tried introducing us, she didn't speak and then later complained I was very rude. She's a year younger than my mum and he tried to make out she's a mother figure and a good friend.
The following few days were strange, I was feeling jangled but still trying to get on with everything. We are in June now. He started bringing his work phone in with him and low and behold a message pings up from her- love hearts and all this bull. So it all comes out. They fucking love each other, she persued him and made it sexual. He loves it. I have yet another health issue resulting in small outpaitent surgury, its ok but im dealing with everything and it's a lot. Listening to him talk about her and how angry he feels towards me.
We hash it out. Nothing physical has ever happened obviously, gotta be in at least the same country for that blah blah blah. A lot of hurtful things were said (by him) but ultimately we decided to move on together and part of it was that they had to be NC. In the interests of open clarity and fairness, I emailed info to her husband. I'd have wanted to know. I apparently put her in danger from this which resulted in more anger.
I sought therapy and my health improved and I thought everything was going ok. Booked a holiday together for spring 2024 and, even though I had some blips in response to triggering behaviour, I thought we were doing ok. By Christmas I felt safe about opening up and felt more comfortable like we were back to our old selves. We had a festive blip- he tells me there's no longevity becuase I lost it over shit hidden in a cupboard that she'd gifted him. I need to get over it. He apologises for overreacting. We move on.
Jan 2024, I'm ill again. And it's wiped me out. I'm a mess. March 2024 roles around. Im still not right, struggling with my health and managing everything. Lo and behold, there's an email from her husband in my inbox with a LOAD of incriminating sexual screenshots and videos in a chat between my partner and his wife. Transpires NC never happened, or a least did only for a couple of weeks. He missed her too much. It's been going on again. Behind my back. Interestingly, I could not see him in any of what i was emailed, only her and he is very clear she is a friend and he never did anything inappropriate and had asked her to stop. Most of the time it wasn't like that but when she wanted to be naughty she would. I still stand by the fact friends wouldn't behave like that with boundaries and risking relationships, and if he really didn't want it he'd have put a stop to it.
It has been AWFUL. I insist on NC. He's very worried about whats going to happen to her, husband is allegedly not too nice. Partner is also suggesting that he'd just go behind my back because she's his safe space and he loves her, not in a romantic way mind.... Husband messages me to say they are getting a divorce (there have been several men, from our country- my partner was not as special as he thought). I worry having had it made clear that husband isn't so nice, I figure the news is better off coming from me. I tell him and he asks to be in contact with her.
Now here is where I might have gone wrong. I say to the pair of them to behave like long distance friends, set parameters- no pics, videos, love yous love hearts, whatever. She accepted full responsibility for everything and apologised. He says contact will dwindle over time and it will be ok. He wouldn't hurt me again. I felt like this was the right thing to do and that I could manage it. If they were genuinely just friends and it was her being broken and sad making it weirdly sexual maybe it would be ok, especially as I felt I'd said my piece and gotten some understanding.
I lasted 3 weeks. The contact level was insane. She was the 3rd wheel on our holiday. Honestly, it fucking killed me. I have never been so sad. And I was aware that pretty quickly my conditions of contact had been ignored. I broke down about 3 weeks later and said I couldn't do it anymore. Even with him saying that with the divorce the contact would decrease becuase she'd meet someone else etc. He said he'd cut contact and all he needed to know was that she'd be ok. He gets it done and I am surprised given everything I didnt think it would be an option. He said he knew it was hurting me but didn't do anything about it.
We've been going ok, probably about 3 weeks of realtive peace. Until today. I take a work call and he scuttles into another room and I can fucking hear them in a video call together. Apparently its only very recent- I mean its only been 3 weeks🤦🏻‍♀️. Apparently he's very lonely and doesn't want a miserable life of being monitored all the time. The trust is broken and its me thats dragging it out. Seems me saying I couldn't cope with them being in constant contact makes this my fault becuase he just misses her all the time.
So yeah. Hes downstairs on the sofa, messaging her. And I'm upstairs venting to you guys becuase WTF.
I'd do a TLDR but honestly, how?!

Today, I finally put on my altered dress for my (23f) best friend's (24f) engagement party. Although I look beautiful in it and I am feeling myself, I keep having flashbacks and flashfowards of what can go bad.
We met on facebook when we were both in high school and clicked, despite having bad opinions about each other. We had plenty of common things to talk about, and I honestly admired her for how intelligent and well spoken she is. Although, she always was the kind that had her mind set on an ideal when it came to relationships that resulted in a very toxic dynamic between her and her partner. When her partner didn't satisfy her, she would go cold and never said what was wrong. Instead, she was venting to me. That made our friendship toxic. She would constantly cheat emotionally on her partner with me. Things escalated quickly, and we actually caught feelings for each other. I started to be her actual lover, and I felt guilty about it. At some point, we were in a relationship, too. It was a short and bad one that put our friendship on a pause.
4 years later, I decided to reconnect with her because I thought that I wasn't going to waste a good friendship in a bad relationship, and it was a very good decision. We were both healthier, and now we had a better dynamic, too. I talked to her about my boyfriend ( 25m) and our love story. Long story short, he is my soulmate. I am convinced about that. No relationship compares to this one. I told her about how fast we had to move on because of our circumstances and how nice it is to live with him, and she understood. She is happy with our relationship and wishes us the best. Not so much later, she met her current fiancé (25m). He was quite intimidated by me, he told that to my face but we clicked well. That's until we found out that he is quite dodgy. He is a womanizer who decided to "settle" and fell for her quickly. He also is the kind to search for the most dodgy jobs just to make a bit more cash, that he spends quickly on god knows what. He saw everything. Drugs, prostitution, robberies, death, etc. Not only that, but he is cocky about never being caught, too. I thought they were an odd pairing since she is the independent, level-headed but introverted big sister that took no shit from anyone, but whatever. We didn't want to judge. They moved on quickly with their relationship, even quicker than me, and my boyfriend did. They got engaged in 8 months, and three months later, she is pregnant, too. Their engagement lasted only 6 months, and next month, they are getting married. Because a wedding is quite expensive for them right now, they decided to skip the church wedding and only do the official documents and do an engagement dinner party with their close family and friends. Oh boy, the organization is a mess.
First, they asked us to be their godparents but quickly changed their minds after their parents realized that me and my boyfriend are not married, which is a big problem with the church but not with the documents. I wanted to point that out to them since they are not going to be wedded in church but whatever. Ever since we were in high school, she promised me that I would be her godmother to her wedding. It was disappointing, but I knew that I needed to be flexible. Second, she wants her guests to dress more elegantly for the event. Her fiancé and my BF got a bit fussy that they couldn't wear jeans and Hawaiian shirts, but we quickly changed their minds. But this transitioned to the third problem. I had to get my dress pretty early into the engagement so we could save some money. I got a nice dress for my budget: a midi mint dress with puffy veil sleeves and crochet flowers motifs that enhanced my bosom. I checked with her if the color and the model were ok, and she said that she was happy with it... Until she got her dress. She decided to dress in a way more layed back style and get a white cotton beach dress. It's incredibly simple, and my boyfriend described it to be a sack of potatoes in comparation to what I was wearing. Not only that, but it was 5 times more expensive than mine. This was a problem. I didn't want to overdress or upstage the bride to be, so I got another dress that's more laid back, the one that I am currently wearing so my mom could alter her a bit. Fourth, they keep changing the dates, and that got everyone annoyed because it messed with the free work days. Fortunately, this was resolved, and now they have a date that's set in stone. The organization is quite messy, too. BF had the condition that he didn't want to drive in the city, so he would drink, something that can't happen because they have many guests and not enough cars. We live far away from them, in a suburban area. There is a 5 hour drive between us and besides them, we don't know anyone in their city. They offered us a free room ( baby's future room) but even that is uncertain. Fifth, they are not the most stable couple. Her fiancé gets mad and jealous quite easily. He used to fight with her when she wears more make-up than usual or she was too indiferent to his flirting. She is the kind of woman who never wears her emotions, and that drives him nuts. She did open up slowly to him, but it's too slow for his pace. Not only this, but he has a high-sexual drive while her's is low. He gets very fussy when they don't get to have regular sex. When she got pregnant, the gyno told her to stop sexual relations for a while, so the baby stays in place. He said that he can't stop having sex for his own health, and it is quite unfair. She hit him with an ultimatum that if he made her abort it, she would never have kids with him again. That made him settle, at least for a while. He is also the kind that wants a boy, so he could continue his "legacy." If that didn't make it clear for what kind of person he is, then I don't know what more can I tell you. Also, the both of them hinted that me and boyfriend should get pregnant too, so our children could be best friends just like us. We quickly shut it down with "With what money?Plus, we are not mentally prepared for it". Which brings us to the sixth problem, and I and BF are not in a stable money situation like they are. BF used to be overworked and paid badly while I couldn't work right now. He did get to change his job for a better one, which is a huge relief. I wanted to work, I wished to, but bestie and her fiancé keep wanting to have vacations with us twice a year. No workplace would be able to give me that many holidays, which I know is unfair. That's the country we live in. Because of this, for the last year, we were on a tight budget that couldn't allow any more changes.
Besides these problems, there are many more things like family drama and other money problems. Because of the constant change, me and boyfriend are stressed and this got us in an argument. First being about my dress and then about the couple that couldn't understand our money problems. Me and bf resolved it, but he has some good points. The organization is as messy as their future marriage.
I apologize if I've made grammar mistakes, english is not my first language.

yeah well just the title , appeared times ( 2023 feb , july and now 2024 feb)
scores respt in the same order 71 ,68, 83
firstly no i was not dumb kind or just did it for the sake of it , but never took boards seriously ( yeah you shouldnt now you know ) moreover the level of checking is fuckin brutal too keep in mind
coming to students who wanna give improvement i urge dont go for the july one like really dont
not just its hard or of the same level but you dont have the time to prepare also even if you do give it rn just for the sake then also youd still have to wait the entire year to apper for your target exams ( jee , cet..) so go w the feb one and i am STRESSING OVER IT go w the feb one
​
also even you know the papers are not hard you just dont study for it so give designated time for it in a week for the rest months till feb and you can easily go beyond 90+
in my case i had a lot of personal issues and i just could not give up i had to fight it even tho had the shittiest luck throughout my drop year but i improved a lot have a decent rank in jee mains and now final focus will be bitsat and gonna give my all to it
​
1 )key points for improvement -
yes you have to give in all subject ,
you can give it consecative two times within a year ( july /feb)
your college have the forms for all the formalitites
yes you have to give practicals again
if you appear it in feb you will be along the new candidtates who wil be fresh and writting it next year
the level is same as feb in july too
the checking is the same too , moreover its quite brutal so make sure you do it right
2) personal opinion
go w the feb one i cant stress over it , give designated time for it and finally do all the pyqs and marathons for it
channels i recomend ( same can be used for cet )
ganitank
sovind sir chem
and the best I MEAN THE BEST for physics is STUDY CHAKRA , for cet aswell as hsc
​
finally it was a tough journey if you can go for offline centre for drop it kills you within i have frnds from coep , vjti , pict ,iiitdelhi and what not so it is draining seeing your frnds move on but you have to be strong and face it
i just could not give up i wanted to prove myself and hence tried my all matter of fact this was my last chance , and yes it feels a bit shameful but when you do it no one would ask you the negatives
so all the best , you can do it!

just looking for other ppls perspectives maybe support idk idk what to do
~rant/vent~
🔍I had pretyped this just ranting then I realized i can post it anonymously here bc i’m really struggling and would like some outside advice human to human feels like i’m gaslighting myself lol. They have supported me and given me everything I need materialistically and do what they are supposed to as parents in that aspect I am very grateful and appreciative of that. in no way shape or form will I ever complain ab them giving me food, shelter, clothes etc. I’m not seeking to be coddled or get sympathy either i just need to know if it really is that bad or am I tripping.
🔬emotionally manipulative & guilt tripping parents will be their own demise. lol. finally dropping that mask you have with them, making them look at themselves and see the torment i had to mentally internalize & take on over the years > sitting back & letting them continue their behavior and control to keep destroying your identity & self continuing to deal with immense shame, guilt, sadness, and anger because you know how they are and you think theres no point in opening up to them or telling them what they do wrong bc they always do the same shit & continue to blame you for everything. note this though when I finally released all my years of internalized emotions on them and started texting them very knowledgeable shit about themselves, how they treated me, my mom trying to control and ruin me and my girlfriends relationship when we first got together (+ we have continued to be together for 1yr and 3 months still going strong she ain’t ruin shiiiit) & shit talked my gf for no reason at all. When I started texting paragraph after paragraph (+ texting them back and forth.) I was met with my mom thinking something isn’t right regarding my mental health and telling my dad and brother she thinks something is wrong with me again (she was surprised how I could speak so knowledgeable bc I barely even interact with them anymore) them texting my phone asking if everything is okay and they are worried ab me (she’s also made many comments before this situation like “you seem like you need to get back on ur medication you’re being irritable” etc when clearly that was the correct response to some fucked up comment she made i’m sick of that shit.) (sorry that was lowkey irrelevant but holy shit). them throwing what they do for me as PARENTS in my face, blame shifting, manipulation, lying, her saying she has no acknowledgment of ever treating me like that over the years, trying to ruin our relationship, or saying any of the vile shit she said about my gf. OH and how she thought It couldn’t possibly be me that’s writing these exceptional level paragraphs and she thought my gf was controlling me and making me send all of that to my parents(me texting her ab this shit went on for like 3 days, 3 days of her not taking accountability for anything, lying, trying to manipulate by making me feel bad as well and she had the nerve to say “it feels like i’m being abused” GIRLLL STOPPP HUH im still confused ab that one) it’s honestly sickening and baffling knowing ppl can think & say shit like that. i’ve been so detached from them since I was little (never knew why at the time) but THIS makes that detachment 100x worse and I feel like that’s a GOOD thing for me even though the outcome wasn’t what I wanted, bc i’m feeling free, released, not pint-up, etc most importantly more like I can finally be MYSELF!!! i’m way more comfortable in who I am and my Identity now at 19 could you imagine that like damn (just hoping it’s not temporary)!!! just putting this out there in hopes that someone else going through the same thing or similar will see and maybe help them a little. now i just gotta move out.
⚛️ she can’t see how what she says to people effects them drastically and takes 0 responsibility and acknowledgement of doing so and passes it off as “you don’t know me” “i’m a good person” “i have a good heart i love everybody” etc or blame everything on me for examples “we do everything for you” “you’re going to treat us like that when we sacrificed so much for you” etc um .. yeah they signed up for that when they decided to have a child so it’s fucked up to throw that in my face. THEN she loves to do this the most playing the victim card “you’re abusing me” “it feels like you are abusing me” “we feel like we can’t say anything right we are always walking on eggshells around you it’s exhausting” she knows damn well I’m not abusing her in any way shape or form that’s disrespectful to many people who actually had to go through and endure actual abuse. “do you want to hurt us? is that your goal” “you’re destroying the family” “you’re destroying our marriage” etc literally used to be all the timmmme when i was going through sh and stuff too. i didn’t do anything wronggggg all I did was speak up for myself FOR ONCE (bc it’s been YEARS) ab the shit she does and how i’m not okay with it i internalize literally everything (that’s y it took years. just sick of their shit idk what to do). low and behold after all that expressing I get met with all that blame shifting and lying. the reason why i never open up to her is bc when I do ever since i was little she always blamed me and made it seem like this whole other thing so hell yeah i’d rather internalize then talk to her that’s a way better option than getting met with guilt tripping and shit what else could I do but internalize n doing that fucked my head up BAD. there are MANY more examples of what else she would say and my dad too but i really think he’s brainwashed by her so idk that’s just off the top of my head .. lmao. she makes me feel so insaneee i even feel like i’m exaggerating and making a big deal n being too sensitive writing all this😵‍💫. there’s SO MUCH more context but fuck all that i typed enough. thx for coming to my ted talk🕷️.
🤢they are both closeted RACIST and openly HOMOPHOBIC so you can imagine what they say/have said to me and about other ppl. shit makes me so AHHH. anyways.

Now that the sun has set on another season it’s time to reflect on our performance throughout and look forward to how next season could go.
TLDR; Much improved season but game management has cost us throughout. Continued strong recruitment for next season especially at Manager position.
Let’s begin with the raw stats.
We finished 10th for the second successive season but amassed our highest points total of 18 in the WSL alongside our best goal scoring season with 26 goals for and our best defensive season conceding 45 goals against. An improvement of 11 more goals scored and 3 fewer goals conceded than last season.
We finished third in our Continental Cup group losing only one game to Manchester United which ultimately cost us progression to the knockouts.
Furthermore, we reached the FA Cup semi final for the first time in our history, dominating lower league teams along the way.
Our top 5 goal scorers (in all competitions):
Rantala - 10 Cayman - 7 Petermann - 6 Tierney - 4 O’Brien/Whelan/Rose - 3
Top 5 assist providers (in all competitions):
Rantala - 7 Momiki - 5 Petermann - 4 Tierney - 4 Takarada - 3
End of season awards winners:
Player of the Season - Rantala Players player - Rantala Goal of the Season - Goodwin vs Liverpool Academy Player of the Season - Kiera Bell
Congratulations to all. Now on to the review proper.
We start with the positives. Recruitment has been great this year. The additions of Petermann, Rantala and Cayman have increased our goal scoring output and the acquisitions of Lietzig, Kop, Thibaud, Rose, Momiki and Takarada has added greater depth and quality to our squad and made us a more competitive team throughout the season.
We very rarely sat in against teams, aimed to play out from the back and press opposition back lines which served us well and earned plaudits from around the league especially early on in the campaign.
Additionally we have a very solid tandem of goalkeepers in Leitzig and Kop that have shown they can be rotated in for each other and not effect the confidence of the team in front of them which is a great bonus.
Finally, we continue to see success in our youth academy with them winning the double of the PGA Plate and County Cup as well as academy players continuing to get minutes in the senior team.
Now, unfortunately, the negatives.
Elephant in the room is the managerial situation. After Kirk’s dismissal for unprofessional conduct and Foster stepping down as interim manager with the conclusion of the season we are now searching for our fourth manager in three seasons in the WSL.
Something is very clearly not right behind the scenes when our last 2 male managers have crossed professional boundaries with players and our last permanent female manager was unceremoniously dismissed hours after a giving a pre match press conference. Questions have to be asked about how our next manager is going to be recruited, monitored and assessed by the higher ups. This inconsistency has been reflected in our on pitch performances and the players must be commended for how they have handled the off pitch turmoil.
To be optimistic, whomever the next manager shall be they need to keep pushing the progressive, attacking football we have developed under Kirk whilst making us a less porous side defensively and able to manage games better and see them out especially when we have the lead.
Which very neatly leads me to our biggest downside this campaign, our game management.
All of our 4 league victories this season came against two teams (Bristol City and Everton) half of those came in the opening two games of the season (where we were briefly top of the league 🙌🏻) and the other 2 came in three games at the end of January/beginning of February. That is a long time to go without success without it effecting not only our league standing but the morale of the team.
It has been a reverse of our previous seasons where instead of seeing us floundering at the bottom to pop up at the end of the season we have watched us have an electric start only to slowly but surely watch our league position erode away.
The story of our season was giving up leads and losing points from winning positions happening 7 times in the league. The most defining examples is being 2-0 up at halftime at home to Arsenal, being the better side only to be decimated in the second half and lose 6-2. Drawing 1-1 in stoppage time to a 10 player West Ham and both games against Brighton. First surrendering a two goal advantage in the final 10 minutes of the away fixture to draw the game and then taking the lead at home to only go 2-1 down, fight back to level the tie but lose to another goal conceded in the last 5 minutes.
Of those 7 leads and potential 21 points lost, if we win against West Ham and Brighton, that’s 9 points in our favour and we would be celebrating a much stronger finish to our season.
With regards to looking forward to next season I do feel we have very strong foundations to build upon and become even more competitive not only in the league but have strong cup runs as proven by our results in a tough Conti Cup group and our semi final appearance in the FA Cup.
As for personnel we have a squad full of internationals with at least half a season of chemistry with each other, excellent training facilities and the privilege of playing at the King Power for home league games.
Obviously we need a quality manager to lead us. I would have jumped at the chance to take on Carla Ward but she is taking time out to spend time with her family. Aside from her I am not so well versed in the women’s managerial landscape to make an educated suggestion. Maybe Melissa Phillips, formerly of Brighton who seemed to have good respect from her players and a decent track record with London City Lionesses and Brighton.
For players I would like to see another striker brought in. When Petermann isn’t available we lack a focal point up top and Siemsen hasn’t been relied upon much when fit.
Cover at full back would be a priority as well. Bott is outstanding and we can always rely on the experience of Cayman but depth is definitely an issue. Ale did a decent job towards the tail end of the season but is only on loan and Nevin has seemingly dropped down the pecking order.
Further depth in the middle with the departure of Whelan and a younger, more modern centre half (think Plumptre) to complement the guile and physicality that we have in place.
A third experienced keeper wouldn’t go amiss to cover for injury to Kop or Leitzig.
I’m genuinely excited to see how he play with a fully fit complement of wingers next year as that is where we are stacked with promise: Rantala, Rose, Cain, Goodwin, O’Brien and Momiki (on occasion) offer a truly dangerous outlet for us and pose any defender a headache.
One final note. Thank you to Whelan for her services as our club Captain for the last two seasons. She has lead by example, never kicked up a fuss not being a starter this season and always given 100% on the pitch. May she enjoy her retirement from football.
Feel free to add your own thoughts and opinions and we look forward to improving further in the off season.
COYF 🦊

I'm not the best at speaking with people in online games, i just get anxious. I'm not looking for any handouts, but more somebody to show me a few things for an hour or 2. I play Fo4 and have played 3 and NV but am quite new to 76.
I started and over 2 days got to level 10. Joined some events, did one crazy one, I died and nobody revived me. I got back there and I waited for the bigger dudes to loot everything and went around grabbing what was left. Ammo, stimpacks and food i needed more. There was a gun higher then my level on a dead enemy. This dude harassed me non stop talking smack and following me round like a mad man doing emotees and jumping all around me also messaging. If he said 'Bro I was waiting for that drop please let me have it' I'd have done it without hesitation but this is the sort of stuff why I dont bother with people online.
I really want to do a few events to open a couple of fast travel spots because im at a point where im low on ammo and stims, and getting wrecked while trying to just get around to quests. Also the whole camp and season thing is a new to me, theres a few things I could use advice with if its ok.
I am on Xbox, and will hop on later on today. Anyone welcome and I have a mic

~rant/vent~
🔍I had pretyped this just ranting then I realized i can post it anonymously here bc i’m really struggling and would like some outside advice human to human feels like i’m gaslighting myself lol. They have supported me and given me everything I need materialistically and do what they are supposed to as parents in that aspect I am very grateful and appreciative of that. in no way shape or form will I ever complain ab them giving me food, shelter, clothes etc. I’m not seeking to be coddled or get sympathy either i just need to know if it really is that bad or am I tripping.
🔬emotionally manipulative & guilt tripping parents will be their own demise. lol. finally dropping that mask you have with them, making them look at themselves and see the torment i had to mentally internalize & take on over the years > sitting back & letting them continue their behavior and control to keep destroying your identity & self continuing to deal with immense shame, guilt, sadness, and anger because you know how they are and you think theres no point in opening up to them or telling them what they do wrong bc they always do the same shit & continue to blame you for everything. note this though when I finally released all my years of internalized emotions on them and started texting them very knowledgeable shit about themselves, how they treated me, my mom trying to control and ruin me and my girlfriends relationship when we first got together (+ we have continued to be together for 1yr and 3 months still going strong she ain’t ruin shiiiit) & shit talked my gf for no reason at all. When I started texting paragraph after paragraph (+ texting them back and forth.) I was met with my mom thinking something isn’t right regarding my mental health and telling my dad and brother she thinks something is wrong with me again (she was surprised how I could speak so knowledgeable bc I barely even interact with them anymore) them texting my phone asking if everything is okay and they are worried ab me (she’s also made many comments before this situation like “you seem like you need to get back on ur medication you’re being irritable” etc when clearly that was the correct response to some fucked up comment she made i’m sick of that shit.) (sorry that was lowkey irrelevant but holy shit). them throwing what they do for me as PARENTS in my face, blame shifting, manipulation, lying, her saying she has no acknowledgment of ever treating me like that over the years, trying to ruin our relationship, or saying any of the vile shit she said about my gf. OH and how she thought It couldn’t possibly be me that’s writing these exceptional level paragraphs and she thought my gf was controlling me and making me send all of that to my parents(me texting her ab this shit went on for like 3 days, 3 days of her not taking accountability for anything, lying, trying to manipulate by making me feel bad as well and she had the nerve to say “it feels like i’m being abused” GIRLLL STOPPP HUH im still confused ab that one) it’s honestly sickening and baffling knowing ppl can think & say shit like that. i’ve been so detached from them since I was little (never knew why at the time) but THIS makes that detachment 100x worse and I feel like that’s a GOOD thing for me even though the outcome wasn’t what I wanted, bc i’m feeling free, released, not pint-up, etc most importantly more like I can finally be MYSELF!!! i’m way more comfortable in who I am and my Identity now at 19 could you imagine that like damn (just hoping it’s not temporary)!!! just putting this out there in hopes that someone else going through the same thing or similar will see and maybe help them a little. now i just gotta move out.
⚛️ she can’t see how what she says to people effects them drastically and takes 0 responsibility and acknowledgement of doing so and passes it off as “you don’t know me” “i’m a good person” “i have a good heart i love everybody” etc or blame everything on me for examples “we do everything for you” “you’re going to treat us like that when we sacrificed so much for you” etc um .. yeah they signed up for that when they decided to have a child so it’s fucked up to throw that in my face. THEN she loves to do this the most playing the victim card “you’re abusing me” “it feels like you are abusing me” “we feel like we can’t say anything right we are always walking on eggshells around you it’s exhausting” she knows damn well I’m not abusing her in any way shape or form that’s disrespectful to many people who actually had to go through and endure actual abuse. “do you want to hurt us? is that your goal” “you’re destroying the family” “you’re destroying our marriage” etc literally used to be all the timmmme when i was going through sh and stuff too. i didn’t do anything wronggggg all I did was speak up for myself FOR ONCE (bc it’s been YEARS) ab the shit she does and how i’m not okay with it i internalize literally everything (that’s y it took years. just sick of their shit idk what to do). low and behold after all that expressing I get met with all that blame shifting and lying. the reason why i never open up to her is bc when I do ever since i was little she always blamed me and made it seem like this whole other thing so hell yeah i’d rather internalize then talk to her that’s a way better option than getting met with guilt tripping and shit what else could I do but internalize n doing that fucked my head up BAD. there are MANY more examples of what else she would say and my dad too but i really think he’s brainwashed by her so idk that’s just off the top of my head .. lmao. she makes me feel so insaneee i even feel like i’m exaggerating and making a big deal n being too sensitive writing all this😵‍💫. there’s SO MUCH more context but fuck all that i typed enough. thx for coming to my ted talk🕷️.
🤢they are both closeted RACIST and openly HOMOPHOBIC so you can imagine what they say/have said to me and about other ppl. shit makes me so AHHH. anyways.

Hey I'm still new to d&d and never expect my first ever experience to be like this it was my first ever campaign the DM seemed nice enough and the campaign seemed fun it was based on the early medevil times and we had to stop the big bad (never did find out what it was) that was killing everyone and turning them into these undead puppet kinda creature and this constant storm that was on the horizon. Myself and the other party members decided to go explore the town that was a couple miles though the woods, (this seemed to annoy the DM for some unknown reasons) we found out some information about the big bad but not alot before the dm told us that then the storm was approaching and would destroy our base that we where staying at. we decided it would be best if we head back to see if we could protect the camp and the people. (we had another member back at the camp that was afk and a NPC that was helping us) as we were heading back though the rain two of the party members started fighting (I can't remember why) I managed to brake it up and as we were standing in the rain the DM told us to roll a saving throw, one of the people roll 17 and me and the other person both rolled NAT 20s (I rolled a nat20 and with my wisdom it was 22) the DM then decided to do a tpk (total party killed) without telling us what killed us and after the 3rd time of asking he told us "the storm kills you and that you needed to roll a 23 and higher to survive". After that he just disappeared and stopped replying to everyone in the group. I messaged one of the other members of the party to ask about what happend as they were more experienced at playing then me and he was like "we are all level 1 there is no way that we can get 23 and higher for a saving throw unless we put all our stats into wisdom" I messaged the DM a couple of times with no reply until one day when he just deleted the group and told me it would be better if I found another group and that he wasn't continuing because he didn't like one of the players and how they play, I was the only one to get a reply and to be told why he was quitting (i play on discord) i have thankfully found 2 new campaigns that i am a part of that i enjoy playing but as a first experience and first ever campaign it was not an enjoyable experience, also i have been told that most campaign do a session zero to introduce you to the campaign and the world this didn't happen and i was dropped straight into the session and felt very awkward as the campaign had already had two sessions prior to me joining I had no idea what had happened and what's happening and what the group already knew. (Ps sorry for any spelling mistakes or anything I'm dyslexic)

Throwaway here
Up until a few days ago I (39m) was dating/just establishing a relationship with a single mother (41f). We have been seeing each other for just over 2 months. Not a long time I know but the ease in which we connected really felt very unique and different than past relationships. A fact she acknowledged more than once. We share similar perspectives, find enjoyment in many of the same things, equally dorky and awkward. We really felt in sync.
I know the intensity of feelings I felt towards her were disproportionate, in a typical sense, to the amount of time we spent/knew each other. When speaking with friends I even said it was stupid I felt this strength of connection so quickly. I know it's easy to think I was naive or seeing things that weren't there, but I am confident that's not the case. There were real reciprocation of feelings and intensity in moments that we both identified. I think I communicate well, I am clear, and understanding, and a good listener. She really appreciated this quality and as such was very open and clear about her feelings towards me as well. Saying things like how she's never dated someone like me (I've been through some shit, did therapy, became pretty emotionally intelligent and self-reflective as a result), telling me how appreciative she is for me, gave me a card stating this on the day she started to pull back actually, how my touch gives her tingles. Straight up telling me a week before how she really likes me.
Yes we were intimate a few times. Intense and mutually satisfying, had improtu spicy chats during the day including the day before we last saw each other. On top of her words and discussions there were actions that also spoke to her really being serious about the connection we were developing. She happens to live right next to her parents and her sisters family. Now she could have kept me separate from all that, but she didn't. I met her sister pretty early on when having a date night at her house. Then a week later she invites me to her sister's house for a little BBQ, was an excellent night. And I ended up meeting her parents too. Not by happenstance either, but rather here come inside my parents house and say hello. And she was having conversations with her son about me and trying to get him comfortable with the idea of meeting me. I even helped her move appliances with her and her dad 3 days before the pull back and 1 week before she ended it. I even installed the washer and dryer for her, then encouraged her to go to an event for her son right after I got done, without me. I didn't do it for any other reason than I really liked her and acts of service are one of the ways I show how I care and it made me feel good to do it, to be there for her. This all has a certain connotation or level of seriousness in a relationship all in its own.
My emotions fed off of her words and actions, maybe my openness and honesty felt like a bit much at times, like I was oversharing. But it was honest and reciprocated every time. There were palpable moments of electricity between us.
Then came the pull back...she is a nurse who works 12 hour shifts and has shared custody of her son. I work a typical m-f schedule. So as we are building this whatever it was, spending time together was a challenge sometimes. I completely respect her keeping me separate from her son until the time was right, never pushed, always accepted that her role as a mother comes first.
So she asks me if I want to do dinner at my house for this past Tuesday. Tuesday is my golf night, but I made an effort to go to work early, leave early, get my match done early so we can have a nice evening. I even took the morning off in case we were up late, so we could maybe wake up next to each other and enjoy sometime together in the morning. She was really excited about this, or rather implied that she was. Even had the spicy talk the day before.
Then she arrives and I can tell something is off. Shes not as receptive to my touch, dynamic is off. After dinner we sit on the couch and she breaks down in tears. She's feeling like we are moving fast, she feels like our texting is taking away from time with her son, wants to dial it back. She has her son for a 5 day stint starting the next day, doesn't want to feel tethered to her phone, wants to feel present. Okay, I get it, respect it, no problem at all. She then tells me about how her divorce went down, kind of wild and not exactly how she made it seem at first. She definitely still is working through that stuff and the ex dynamic is poor and I think he bullies her and knows her buttons. I straight up told her that if I was her partner I would be there and defend her and not let his bullshit slide (maturely, I'm 40 and don't need to be physical). She did say a few times that she was always waiting for the other shoe to drop with us because of her past relationship trauma. But guys, I have no other shoe. I'm a god damn gentleman doing his best to operate in a time when women are more independent, and I support it and respect it.
I send her an email the following day apologizing if I came in to strong, I believe in what we are building, I respect boundaries and her and all her terrific attributes. She responds by saying it was beautiful and she looks forward to moving forward with me. I also suggest phone calls or Video chats in lieu of texting moving forward. And I assured her I didn't need to be in contact 24/7 and that I like my independence as well.
Over the next couple days I let her lead the conversation. If she texted I responded. Typically it wasn't immediately but within 15 minutes unless I myself was busy. I wouldn't try and engage in long discussions. Just little check ins it seemed like. Then her text style changed again, less frequent, no emoji, no real engagement from her in to my activities. I felt it coming.
She was ill over these past few days with bronchitis and was having her period, she felt cruddy and I felt bad I couldn't be there for her like I wanted to. I would ask how she was doing, if she needed anything. Her response was that I was sweet but she could manage. But she began to not ask me about what I was up to, or really engage much at all.
Saturday she ends it, says she hasn't really put all her focus on being a mom since her divorce (4 years ago), she made some relationship mistakes post divorce, still healing, really wants to be there for her son (kid sounds amazing btw). But okay, yeah I am bummed but I respect it. What else can I do right? Kid comes first, I get it.
But you know what really bothered me is that when asked about what we were felt for each other, if it was real, she denies we had this special connection and that she thinks she was forcing it....so my long winded question here is... After all that, does that sound like she was forcing it? She said she felt there was an incompatibility but couldn't identify what it was. She's sorry for leading me on, then tells me not to lose her number. Like wtf? I think she is either lying to herself to make herself feel better or there is something else going on. My hypothesis is that our potential scared her, she doesn't want to get big time hurt again and is anxious about it and somebody put the bug in her ear that the feelings she is having is because she is forcing it (she mentioned a comment a coworker made to this extent about it being forced because she wasnt as giddy as she had been, I think she was fearful and this person labeled it as force). I say this because it all doesn't make sense, I am probably wrong, help me make sense of this, please.
Tl;Dr built a wicked connection with a woman, have evidence it wasn't one sided, special connection, met her parents, installed her appliances, got dumped a week later and was told it wasn't real but forced.

Throwaway here
Up until a few days ago I (39m) was dating/just establishing a relationship with a single mother (41f). We have been seeing each other for just over 2 months. Not a long time I know but the ease in which we connected really felt very unique and different than past relationships. A fact she acknowledged more than once. We share similar perspectives, find enjoyment in many of the same things, equally dorky and awkward. We really felt in sync.
I know the intensity of feelings I felt towards her were disproportionate, in a typical sense, to the amount of time we spent/knew each other. When speaking with friends I even said it was stupid I felt this strength of connection so quickly. I know it's easy to think I was naive or seeing things that weren't there, but I am confident that's not the case. There were real reciprocation of feelings and intensity in moments that we both identified. I think I communicate well, I am clear, and understanding, and a good listener. She really appreciated this quality and as such was very open and clear about her feelings towards me as well. Saying things like how she's never dated someone like me (I've been through some shit, did therapy, became pretty emotionally intelligent and self-reflective as a result), telling me how appreciative she is for me, gave me a card stating this on the day she started to pull back actually, how my touch gives her tingles. Straight up telling me a week before how she really likes me.
Yes we were intimate a few times. Intense and mutually satisfying, had improtu spicy chats during the day including the day before we last saw each other. On top of her words and discussions there were actions that also spoke to her really being serious about the connection we were developing. She happens to live right next to her parents and her sisters family. Now she could have kept me separate from all that, but she didn't. I met her sister pretty early on when having a date night at her house. Then a week later she invites me to her sister's house for a little BBQ, was an excellent night. And I ended up meeting her parents too. Not by happenstance either, but rather here come inside my parents house and say hello. And she was having conversations with her son about me and trying to get him comfortable with the idea of meeting me. I even helped her move appliances with her and her dad 3 days before the pull back and 1 week before she ended it. I even installed the washer and dryer for her, then encouraged her to go to an event for her son right after I got done, without me. I didn't do it for any other reason than I really liked her and acts of service are one of the ways I show how I care and it made me feel good to do it, to be there for her. This all has a certain connotation or level of seriousness in a relationship all in its own.
My emotions fed off of her words and actions, maybe my openness and honesty felt like a bit much at times, like I was oversharing. But it was honest and reciprocated every time. There were palpable moments of electricity between us.
Then came the pull back...she is a nurse who works 12 hour shifts and has shared custody of her son. I work a typical m-f schedule. So as we are building this whatever it was, spending time together was a challenge sometimes. I completely respect her keeping me separate from her son until the time was right, never pushed, always accepted that her role as a mother comes first.
So she asks me if I want to do dinner at my house for this past Tuesday. Tuesday is my golf night, but I made an effort to go to work early, leave early, get my match done early so we can have a nice evening. I even took the morning off in case we were up late, so we could maybe wake up next to each other and enjoy sometime together in the morning. She was really excited about this, or rather implied that she was. Even had the spicy talk the day before.
Then she arrives and I can tell something is off. Shes not as receptive to my touch, dynamic is off. After dinner we sit on the couch and she breaks down in tears. She's feeling like we are moving fast, she feels like our texting is taking away from time with her son, wants to dial it back. She has her son for a 5 day stint starting the next day, doesn't want to feel tethered to her phone, wants to feel present. Okay, I get it, respect it, no problem at all. She then tells me about how her divorce went down, kind of wild and not exactly how she made it seem at first. She definitely still is working through that stuff and the ex dynamic is poor and I think he bullies her and knows her buttons. I straight up told her that if I was her partner I would be there and defend her and not let his bullshit slide (maturely, I'm 40 and don't need to be physical). She did say a few times that she was always waiting for the other shoe to drop with us because of her past relationship trauma. But guys, I have no other shoe. I'm a god damn gentleman doing his best to operate in a time when women are more independent, and I support it and respect it.
I send her an email the following day apologizing if I came in to strong, I believe in what we are building, I respect boundaries and her and all her terrific attributes. She responds by saying it was beautiful and she looks forward to moving forward with me. I also suggest phone calls or Video chats in lieu of texting moving forward. And I assured her I didn't need to be in contact 24/7 and that I like my independence as well.
Over the next couple days I let her lead the conversation. If she texted I responded. Typically it wasn't immediately but within 15 minutes unless I myself was busy. I wouldn't try and engage in long discussions. Just little check ins it seemed like. Then her text style changed again, less frequent, no emoji, no real engagement from her in to my activities. I felt it coming.
She was ill over these past few days with bronchitis and was having her period, she felt cruddy and I felt bad I couldn't be there for her like I wanted to. I would ask how she was doing, if she needed anything. Her response was that I was sweet but she could manage. But she began to not ask me about what I was up to, or really engage much at all.
Saturday she ends it, says she hasn't really put all her focus on being a mom since her divorce (4 years ago), she made some relationship mistakes post divorce, still healing, really wants to be there for her son (kid sounds amazing btw). But okay, yeah I am bummed but I respect it. What else can I do right? Kid comes first, I get it.
But you know what really bothered me is that when asked about what we were felt for each other, if it was real, she denies we had this special connection and that she thinks she was forcing it....so my long winded question here is... After all that, does that sound like she was forcing it? She said she felt there was an incompatibility but couldn't identify what it was. She's sorry for leading me on, then tells me not to lose her number. Like wtf? I think she is either lying to herself to make herself feel better or there is something else going on. My hypothesis is that our potential scared her, she doesn't want to get big time hurt again and is anxious about it and somebody put the bug in her ear that the feelings she is having is because she is forcing it (she mentioned a comment a coworker made to this extent about it being forced because she wasnt as giddy as she had been, I think she was fearful and this person labeled it as force). I say this because it all doesn't make sense, I am probably wrong, help me make sense of this, please.
Tl;Dr built a wicked connection with a woman, have evidence it wasn't one sided, special connection, met her parents, installed her appliances, got dumped a week later and was told it wasn't real but forced.

I just had the most heart-wrenching and traumatic experience of my entire life. I had an abortion (took 3 whole procedures and was so traumatising) and my boyfriend shortly after dumped me to travel the world. I trusted him and leaned on him and he dropped me just like that. I’m left picking up the pieces and now severely regretting the abortion. I have complex PTSD and struggle enough as it is. I am finding it so hard to cope with life at the moment. Everything is a complete mess and I’m on the edge. I never felt this depressed, sad, lost or lonely in my life. I want to escape so badly.
I’ve had to leave my flat (I live alone in a city knowing nobody) and stay with my family for a while due to this unexpected situation. I feel so lost and confused , betrayed, broken… I hate this country (UK), I have barely any friends or support here. The only good thing really is my job. It’s very niche, successful and took me a while to get. But I want to leave to the Netherlands - where majority of my friends and happiness are. I have the opportunity to go and apply for a visa to stay there. My heart wants to go so bad as I think I need a fresh start but my head is very confused. I risk losing the job (if they don’t keep me on remotely over there with a foreign contract)… and then struggling to find the same level of occupation in Holland. I could struggle financially. But maybe it’s a risk worth taking. I’m single, 26 with a bachelors and masters degree. I feel like everything’s broken and I don’t know where to go or what to do .

Ok one more post from me today! Lol.
I found Focus of the Abyss(160/34 - not sure if that even makes much difference on a unique item....), and in the compendium it is the last staff listed, and seems really good. What would you more experienced guys list it at to sell? Also considering items seem to have dropped quite a bit on the auction house I guess cause we are further into the season, etc.
Orrrrr if it's just not worth anything, I dunno. I don't care about getting the absolute max for it or anything, but also didn't want to sell myself short if it is worth a decent amount.
Thanks!

I think its always good to set expectations for the transfer window prior to it starting. It is easy to sign multiple players and still want1 more on deadline day. Realistically we are going to be making huge moves but it will be a case of selling fringe players and getting replacements in who will actually form part of the squad. With this in mind I've broken it down to positions and what we need in each.
TLDR is at the bottom for summary of transfers.
GK - Sa, Bentley, King
I would be happy going into the new season with these 3. I do think a better quality back up would be good if we can get somebody on a free but I wouldn't want to spend money in this area when i feel we have others areas we need to improve more.
LB - Ait-Nouri, Bueno
Happy with both of these options and Doc and Toti can cover if we have any lack of depth. Ait-Nouri could be sold if a decent bid comes in but that amount should cover a new LB and 2 other signings which shouldn't be an issue. Ait-Nouri is key to the team and way we play though so it would need to be a substantial offer.
RB - Semedo, Doherty, Bolla, Lembikisa, Hoever
Semedo and Doherty are good options, not sure how I would feel if Semedo got injured and we were dependent on Doherty for the whole season. Hoever has done alright at Stoke and i would be happy to sell now as I don't think his mentality or ability have a place in our squad right now. Bolla has been doing well in Switzerland but at 24 and playing a back up role for us, I think it would be good to cash in on him now albeit we wont get a huge sum for him. Lembikisa has is obviously one for the future and I think loaning him out for another year would help his development and would provide a good replacement for Doherty for 2025/26 season. I would personally do a 6 month loan so we can assess in January whether we need him and if not then we can extend the loan to the end of the season.
CB - Kilman, Bueno, Dawson, Toti, Mosquera, Hubner
Happy with all the main options. Bueno hasnt been great but I think Mosquera will step into the role of back up to the starting 3. Hubner needs to be shipped off now I think. He has barely played in Japan and just seems like the club is holding onto him out of hope more than expectation. Pond is probably the next one on the ranks in the youth team, so if we have a couple of injuries, he can step onto the bench.
CM - Lemina, Gomes, Doyle, Traore, Bellegarde, Hodge, Cundle
I am happy with our options in this area. Bellegarde is in there as I really don't know his best position. He just seems to play where he can get game time. Hodge has dropped out of the team at QPR, I don't know if he will make it to our squad. I would keep him around until pre season and give a full assessment there and decide whether he needs 1 more loan to prove his worth or to sell now. Cundle I think has found his level in the championship and we need to sell now. 4/5 midfielders is good for our 2 midfield system.
Wingers - Neto, Cunha, Sarabia, Enso, Chirewa, Podence, Campbell, Chiquinho, Guedes, Little Lemina
For an area we have had a lack of depth this season, that is a lot of wingers. Guedes and Podence both need to be sold, I think we know that. Neto obviously should stay but if an offer comes in for him then he is the one saleable asset that I wouldn't mind selling. His injuries are too regular for us with the level of club we are at the moment and the money we could get from him would really him strengthen the squad. If we don't sell him then that's great but he either has a brilliant season and we get an offer that we cant refuse next summer or he gets injured again and the cycle continues. Sarabia is really good and has earned more playing time as the season has gone on. I believe he is on a decent amount of money but his experience and technically ability is a must amongst a our forward line. Cunha is obviously a keep and can also be a striker. Enso, Lemina and Chirewa are young and are not reliable yet so we could consider a loan move for them. Might be worth keeping Lemina in the squad and playing for the U21 and occasionally making the bench. The reason for this is that i assume there was a human element to the signing (as well as football ability) given the death of his father and bringing the brothers together and if that was the case i wouldn't want to loan him out yet. This is assuming he stays permanently. Campbell has been playing in League 1 and is 21 now and I think the potential of other younger players is better so its time to part company. Chiquinho needs to come back and be in our squad. He offers a good replacement winger and at a push can cover right back. This essentially leaves us with 4 wingers. This is where we need to go out and get one or 2 players in. Maybe one of those is a loan move for the season so that we aren't stuck with extra players when hopefully Enso comes back and can play that role. Bellegarde can also play out wide if needed.
Striker - Hwang, Fraser, Silva, Sasa
Hwang is obviously a keep. Fraser we were trying to loan out so I think we need to do that to get him some game time. Silva has no interest in playing for us and needs to go. Sasa is injured and will be throughout the window so we will end up keeping him although he probably wont be fit until November. Given this just leaves Hwang fit and available, we need to add depth here. Cunha can slot in here when Hwang is out but really we need an out an out striker option for the bench that can also start. They will need to be happy with a smaller role in the team so an older or younger player or both.
Sell - Hoever, Bolla, Hubner, Cundle, Podence, Guedes, Campbell, Silva
Loan out - Lembikisa, Hodge, Enso , Chirewa, Fraser
Buy/Loan in - Winger x1/2, Striker x2

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rant/vent
🔍I had pretyped this just ranting then I realized i can post it anonymously here bc i’m really struggling and would like some outside advice human to human feels like i’m gaslighting myself lol. They have supported me and given me everything I need materialistically and do what they are supposed to as parents in that aspect I am very grateful and appreciative of that. in no way shape or form will I ever complain ab them giving me food, shelter, clothes etc. I’m not seeking to be coddled or get sympathy either i just need to know if it really is that bad or am I tripping.
🔬emotionally manipulative & guilt tripping parents will be their own demise. lol. finally dropping that mask you have with them, making them look at themselves and see the torment i had to mentally internalize & take on over the years > sitting back & letting them continue their behavior and control to keep destroying your identity & self continuing to deal with immense shame, guilt, sadness, and anger because you know how they are and you think theres no point in opening up to them or telling them what they do wrong bc they always do the same shit & continue to blame you for everything. note this though when I finally released all my years of internalized emotions on them and started texting them very knowledgeable shit about themselves, how they treated me, my mom trying to control and ruin me and my girlfriends relationship when we first got together (+ we have continued to be together for 1yr and 3 months still going strong she ain’t ruin shiiiit) & shit talked my gf for no reason at all. When I started texting paragraph after paragraph (+ texting them back and forth.) I was met with my mom thinking something isn’t right regarding my mental health and telling my dad and brother she thinks something is wrong with me again (she was surprised how I could speak so knowledgeable bc I barely even interact with them anymore) them texting my phone asking if everything is okay and they are worried ab me (she’s also made many comments before this situation like “you seem like you need to get back on ur medication you’re being irritable” etc when clearly that was the correct response to some fucked up comment she made i’m sick of that shit.) (sorry that was lowkey irrelevant but holy shit). them throwing what they do for me as PARENTS in my face, blame shifting, manipulation, lying, her saying she has no acknowledgment of ever treating me like that over the years, trying to ruin our relationship, or saying any of the vile shit she said about my gf. OH and how she thought It couldn’t possibly be me that’s writing these exceptional level paragraphs and she thought my gf was controlling me and making me send all of that to my parents(me texting her ab this shit went on for like 3 days, 3 days of her not taking accountability for anything, lying, trying to manipulate by making me feel bad as well and she had the nerve to say “it feels like i’m being abused” GIRLLL STOPPP HUH im still confused ab that one) it’s honestly sickening and baffling knowing ppl can think & say shit like that. i’ve been so detached from them since I was little (never knew why at the time) but THIS makes that detachment 100x worse and I feel like that’s a GOOD thing for me even though the outcome wasn’t what I wanted, bc i’m feeling free, released, not pint-up, etc most importantly more like I can finally be MYSELF!!! i’m way more comfortable in who I am and my Identity now at 19 could you imagine that like damn (just hoping it’s not temporary)!!! just putting this out there in hopes that someone else going through the same thing or similar will see and maybe help them a little. now i just gotta move out.
⚛️ she can’t see how what she says to people effects them drastically and takes 0 responsibility and acknowledgement of doing so and passes it off as “you don’t know me” “i’m a good person” “i have a good heart i love everybody” etc or blame everything on me for examples “we do everything for you” “you’re going to treat us like that when we sacrificed so much for you” etc um .. yeah they signed up for that when they decided to have a child so it’s fucked up to throw that in my face. THEN she loves to do this the most playing the victim card “you’re abusing me” “it feels like you are abusing me” “we feel like we can’t say anything right we are always walking on eggshells around you it’s exhausting” she knows damn well I’m not abusing her in any way shape or form that’s disrespectful to many people who actually had to go through and endure actual abuse. “do you want to hurt us? is that your goal” “you’re destroying the family” “you’re destroying our marriage” etc literally used to be all the timmmme when i was going through sh and stuff too. i didn’t do anything wronggggg all I did was speak up for myself FOR ONCE (bc it’s been YEARS) ab the shit she does and how i’m not okay with it i internalize literally everything (that’s y it took years. just sick of their shit idk what to do). low and behold after all that expressing I get met with all that blame shifting and lying. the reason why i never open up to her is bc when I do ever since i was little she always blamed me and made it seem like this whole other thing so hell yeah i’d rather internalize then talk to her that’s a way better option than getting met with guilt tripping and shit what else could I do but internalize n doing that fucked my head up BAD. there are MANY more examples of what else she would say and my dad too but i really think he’s brainwashed by her so idk that’s just off the top of my head .. lmao. she makes me feel so insaneee i even feel like i’m exaggerating and making a big deal n being too sensitive writing all this😵‍💫. there’s SO MUCH more context but fuck all that i typed enough. thx for coming to my ted talk🕷️.
🤢not to mention they are closeted RACIST & HOMOPHOBIC

I'd like to address the issue of griefing that's plaguing "high-level" ARAM matches. It seems like every other game, there's at least one player who intentionally ruins the experience for everyone else.
These people get triggered over the smallest things, some examples from my last games include them not getting the preffered champion, enemy team having champions that are annoying to play against, you not playing the way they want you to, or even someone simply picking exhaust. They know that they will go unpunished so almost all of them openly snitch on themselves in chat typing stuff like "ok now i troll", then they proceed to intentionally die or afk between towers acting once in a while like they're participating.
I exclusively play ARAM so i often find myself in matches with the same pool of players and sometimes i can recognize names of individuals who have repeatedly griefed in previous games, yet despite numerous reports they continue to play (and do the same shit over and over again) without consequence. I've never received a notification that someone was penalized for griefing after reporting them.
I understand that it's harder to get punished in ARAM since it's considered a "fun" game mode, but these players are blatant in their behaviour and either openly admit to griefing in game chat or attempt to hold you hostage in champion select.
We need a more efficient system for identifying and banning griefers within the ARAM player base.
TL;DR: ARAM is overrun by griefers who openly admit to trolling and face no punishment. This is especially noticeable for those who mainly play ARAM. This needs to change.