Yesterday was my 38th birthday, I have always said I was gonna take a break but haven’t taking a break more than 4 days in the last 18 years. And that was usually because i was on Antibiotics.
I’m still in good health and have everything and everyone I need, I just need to stop drinking so much. It’s been about a 6pack+ for almost two decades. 100s of blackouts, lots of calories consumed and lots of money spent. I want to be healthier and spend money of family things instead.
I’m a 8x’s a day stoner but I have stopped smoking weed before and that one I can do just by deciding to stop, but with booze for some reason I haven’t been able to.
This weekend I actually told my family I was going to stop, so hopefully with their accountability I will be successful this time.
Any tips for fighting those urges at night, watching a game would be appreciated. I have done Non-alcoholic beers and those aren’t bad so they might be what I have to do.
Also got lots of family parties coming up and hope I can resist there too even though drinking has been one of the things I looked forward to when going to parties. Just have to change the mentality and resist the temptation.
Glad I found this community and will be checking in regularly. Thanks everyone for you stories and inspiration. My new adult life begins today.

I need an idea on how long to expect the pain following my hysterectomy.
My story: I had a total hysterectomy/cystoscopy performed 5/8 due to endometriosis that decided to attach itself to various organs it didn’t belong on. It had been about three years of bleeding nonstop (this is not exaggerated-I should have taken up stock in pads) and horrible pain that no doctor believed. I saw five different obgyns before I found one who would listen to me and stay true to her word to give me a hysterectomy. Fast forward a few months and I got my surgery. They performed a cystoscopy in hospital with the hysterectomy and cleaned out my endo while inside. I was inpatient one night in the hospital to monitor pain/bleeding control. I can’t take NSAIDs so no ibuprofen for me- I am on blood thinners for a clotting disorder and history of several DVTS/pulmonary emboli.
I went home on Percocet because the norco was not controlling my pain. I used them sparingly after the first day or so home. I am not a big pain pill person. They upset my stomach & my dad was lost to substance abuse (started with script pain meds) so I avoid them like the plague. Started having signs of infection day 2 at home. Could not get past my triage nurse to get a note to my doctor. Day 5, 3rd try, after being told to take Tylenol and/or Benadryl, I ended up in my doctors office at her request. Immediately was directly readmitted to the hospital 5 days post op hysterectomy for a nasty, fast-moving infection-I said my pain was 7/10 initially but it only got worse from here. My initial liver labs were elevated so they wouldn’t allow anything with Tylenol. What does that leave? Something called roxicodone- oxy without Tylenol essentially-which gave me sleep paralysis and no pain control whatsoever. Was put on Vancomycin for the infection which then caused a systemic allergic reaction. Was given Hydroxizine to calm that down and Benadryl cream. It did not help much. Was discharged on day 10 post op, with clindamycin to take every 6 hours for 7 days for the infection. They sent home the roxicodone which I said did not help. Went home and began taking antibiotics. Had another allergic reaction, this time a full body, horrendously itchy and burning rash. Called my primary doctor and she took me off of it immediately. She sent me in Keflex. I’m allergic to amoxicillin so this should be a party as well. I have an appointment with the surgeon in three weeks. I have an appt with infectious disease this Friday. I have an appointment with GI for my liver problems (likely caused by surgery or the allergic reaction) Tuesday. I have no pain meds I can take, not even Tylenol or ibuprofen. They told me to take Benadryl and sent in a prescription for Gabapentin and told to use the Benadryl to “knock myself out”. Gabapentin isn’t working but I’m taking it anyways because I don’t know what else to do, hoping maybe it’ll build up some tiny amount of pain control in my system somehow.
I’m not on any weird registry for pain meds issues because I usually just flat out don’t take them, ever. Even when offered them. I don’t understand how this is okay.
So -here I am -2 weeks into this mess, rawdogging this hysterectomy and subsequent infection pain. I’ve been using ice packs and heat packs to do what I can, Zofran that my primary doc sent me in for extremely bad nausea (probably due to the pain), my third round of antibiotics, Benadryl for the leftover allergy rash, and I’m thinking about asking a wrestler to knock me out with a metal chair. I’m on day 13 with no pain relief in sight. I can’t sleep. I’m miserable. Please tell me the pain is going to diminish soon. Tell me what helped you with pain. 🙏

unitedstateshealthcare

I have been facing stomach issues for a while after a bout of viral fever, for which I had to take antibiotics. My current symptoms include diarrhea like stools and some lower rib pain on the left side (not sure if it's related)
I didn't change my diet in any way. I am taking yoghurt and yakult everyday and haven't seen any improvement. On some days I randomly get a good bowel movement. I don't face any nutritional deficiencies (so far as I can tell) and live pretty actively. Not lost any weight.
Recently I have realised that I have developed allergy to eggs. My lips swell up and my throat gets scratchy. Then a few days ago I had beer after a long time and it gave me almost an anaphylaxis like reaction which subsided after allergy medicine.
I have no idea what is happening to me. I feel like giving up without even trying any treatment. This is just a rant I guess. But yeah if someone has gone through something similar please chime in

I wish I had a magic answer but I can tell you a few things that seemed to help. I was always in a some state of flare for about 5 years. It freaked me out and made me scared often. Sometimes I would wake up in pain that would almost bring me to tears. I had near constant bladder pressure and consistent urinary frequency. Sometimes it felt like my bladder was burning. My left kidney hurt off and on. I dreaded flights and long meetings. I slept with a heating pad a lot.
First, I cut out sparkling waters completely, which I drank daily. Then I cut out beer which I also love (I tried switching to athletic brewing no alcohol beer but those eventually flared me too). I also switched to coffee cut with more teechino than coffee (3:1 ratio), but I would still get my lattes a couple times a week bc it’s the one thing I really couldn’t give up. When I was in a stronger flare up some foods would bother me - especially marinara and spicy foods. Keep in mind my favorite beverages are coffee,sparkling water, and beer, but I was desperate for relief.
In December I thought I had a uti so I took two rounds of antibiotics, which calmed my bladder although a culture revealed no bacterial infection after the fact.
In February my mom died, and I decided not to drink any alcohol at all during that time. I was staying at my family’s rural house for a month so no more lattes - just teechino with a tiny bit of real coffee mixed in. Other than that I only drank water. The food I was eating was pretty basic/bland since it was whatever we could muster up the energy to make (think: plain baked chicken with egg noodles).
I also took azo for more than a day or two at a time if my bladder was feeling spicy, and I took aloe pills religiously. (This was different from before when I’d only take azo for a day or two.) Now I’d take it off and on as needed, and my bladder calmed down even more.
It’s May now and I am basically back to “normal.” I don’t drink beer anymore but weirdly I can have a rum and coke and feel fine now. I only have lattes on special occasions and take prelief first if I do. Fizzy drinks don’t seem to bother me as much but I still stick to mostly plain water. Foods are much less of a trigger now - it’s always been mostly liquids for me.
The other thing is that although my mom’s passing was incredibly sad and overwhelming at the time, I feel so much less stress and pressure to be someone I’m not. I’ve also realized that life is short and I want to stress less and enjoy more. I spend a lot of time outside ‘touching grass’ (literally) and gardening in my yard. I feel a weight lifted and I honestly think the lower stress and new outlook on life has a lot to do with it too.
Anyway, I’m not sure what exactly did it but this combination of things got me to a pretty normal state after five years of pain. I do feel that if I overdo it in any area (especially coffee and stress) it would bring me back into a relapse, but for now I’m good! I hope this helps someone since I know how it feels to be in pain that feels like it will never end.

I am not the OP. That is u/No_Chrysler-4-Me. Originally posted on EntitledPeople and pettyrevenge.
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There are two previous BORUs I posted last year:
First Post Jan 8, 2023
Second Post Jan 8, 2023
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Trigger Warning: Domestic Violence
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Editor's Note: THIS IS VERY LONG! OP posts a lot about his family. I will include links to other posts at the bottom of this BORU, but I will keep this post focused on the brother and OP.
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TL;DR of the above BORUs: OP's older brother is lazy and a cheapskate. OP bought a truck, an '03 Toyota Tundra. Brother gets jealous and buys a 01 Dodge Ram 1500, but it's crap. OP tries to help brother fix up the truck despite warning him not to buy it. Once it was running a little better, brother challenges OP to a race. Brother loses and becomes obsessed with practicing racing, ruining the truck further. Eventually they go camping, have more shenanigans, brother finally blows the transmission. Brother has to drive his ex-girlfriend's minivan, which he hates, tries to LS Swap the Ram, but no one will lend him the money. He eventually sells it. Brother doesn't stop there. He NEEDS a truck, so he has the brilliant idea of chopping the minivan up to make it into a truck. He needs money to Frankenstein the minivan, no one will pay, but eventually he cuts it up, uses recycled wood to make the truck bed, etc. He calls it the "Mini-Ram."
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My brother sold the Mini-Ram and got a Silverado. That was fine. It's what happened after that made things worse May 5, 2024
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I've been gone for some time. But I'm back with a bad one. I've spoken before about how my older brother competed with me needlessly. And he did a lot of beyond stupid shit. Well he finally pushed the whole family over the edge, and got disowned. And I'm going to be explaining a lot of what happened the past year, and then some from before that. But it's too long for one post.
Well going back more than a year. Some may remember my brother getting a free minivan from his ex after the Dodge Ram truck I warned him not to buy became a moneypit. I helped him work on that truck and even repaint it. And I helped him remodel his camper trailer too. Why? Because he's my brother. And I guess some part of me deep down kept hoping he'd one day change. But he tried to take credit for things I did. Especially with remodeling the camper. And he had tantrums when called out on his lies. He also became temporarily obsessed with my truck, and even implied he'd just take it from me because he hated driving a minivan. He referred to it as a chick car. He acted like a complete child because I refused to trade vehicles, and even got our parents involved. It was just a really stupid and needless situation that my brother tried to make a hill to die on.
It started when my brother bought his Dodge Ram simply because I bought a Toyota Tundra. He had a perfectly running Subaru Baja before that. Then he said he wanted a man's truck and bought the worst barely running pile he could find that was also overpriced considering the condition. He could have at least aimed for a diesel since he wanted a dodge so bad. Lots of dumb shit happened after that. Including my brother wanting to LS swap the Ram after destroying it's engine and two transmissions. But I'm pretty sure the person who offered to do the LS swap for him was a scammer. Not to mention LS swapping any vehicle basically means replacing the ECU. But it never happened anyway since the engine and transmission my brother wanted sold before he could get them. And he had no running vehicle anymore. So my brother's ex, whom he has a young child with, gave him her old 90s Ford Windstar van. It was admittedly an ugly, dent riddled POS with the rear window busted out. But it still ran and drove surprisingly well, considering that's not one of Ford's better vehicles. And then my brother decided to cut it up into some sort of van/truck. Or a ute as they're called in some places. But he made this thing ugly. Lots of spray foam, recycled wood, and rattle can paint. Even mismatched sub-lights above the cab. He frequently raided the junkyard for parts. And he even glued a Ram badge onto the grill of that van/truck. He called it the Mini-Ram. Lots of stupid cheap mods done to that vehicle too. Someone once asked me how ugly the Mini-Ram was on a scale of 1 to 1000. And I said about a 667.
My brother did a lot of other dumb things in this time. Like following me camping just to piss me off. He was a general leech who stole power from my generator, and tried to steal beer from my camper fridge repeatedly. He was so brazen as to just walk right in, and then tried to pretend to be so drunk he didn't realize what he was doing when caught. I've spoken many times about how he stole booze from me. Until my friends and I revenge pranked him and his near equally douchey friends with a growler full of laxative tainted beer. We admittedly used way too much laxative. But my brother never stole from me again because I threatened to tell everyone about his humiliation. He crapped on his own shoes squatting in the woods. And that's just a bit of it.
Eventually my brother seemed to learn his lesson. He sold the Mini-Ram to someone who actually paid him well for it. And no, I don't know what they did with it. And I don't care. But, when the 2K he sold the Mini-Ram for was combined with his savings, my brother had a bit over 4.5K to buy a better vehicle with. And he spotted a 99 RWD Silverado truck with an extended cab for sale online. He really shouldn't have sold his only method of transportation before having a replacement vehicle ready. But I couldn't fault him for taking the deal when presented, considering what he sold. And as much as my brother annoyed me, I still cared about him enough to help. He showed up begging me to drive him over 60 miles to look at this truck he found on Market Place.
So I reluctantly drove him out to see this truck. It wasn't that bad actually. Save for the rough mismatched paint, the rusty hood, the dents, the cracked windshield, and.... Actually, I guess it was kinda that bad. But not compared to the clapped out Ram my brother bought previously. The Silverado had a manual transmission, which we both confirmed shifted great as the records showed it had been rebuilt a few years before. The engine had been swapped at one time too. So it was kinda hard to gauge the odometer as it had not been rolled back for the new engine. It was at about 350.000 miles, but those numbers don't really mean jack when the engine and tranny have been replaced or rebuilt. Admittedly the engine ran like a top. The tires on the truck were in pretty damn good shape too. And on steel rims. Which I like. Very practical. I asked my brother if this was the manly kind of truck he'd been looking for. And for once he spoke logically and said that he'd rather have this than risk what happened with the Ram again. Fair enough. Besides, Chevy trucks are cool and reliable. I've always liked them. Like a rock as they say.
My brother and I scrutinized this truck in detail like a pair of pawn brokers, and talked the price down to 3K. They wanted 4K. But we could hear a sound while test driving it that was either bad ball joints or wheel bearings. We jacked up the wheels, and the bearings felt and sounded fine. But the ball joints were pretty bad. And that's not a cheap fix unless you can do it yourself. The truck was owned by the seller's father, who'd passed away a year prior. So the guy took 3K for it after we listed the problems. After driving it back, I insisted my brother get the truck to a mechanic ASAP. And he listened that time. The mechanic said the ball joints were about to come apart, and it's have caused a very bad situation if they had. And it cost him a grand to get them replaced. The truck also needed new plates ant the title registered. Which ate up a lot of the remaining budget. Then came the paint. My brother wanted the Silverado painted black right away. I told him to wait. But he didn't listen and DIY'd some body work, and then rattle-canned it with Rustolium turbo cans. The paint was full of orange peel, and overspray. He didn't even use primer. And the truck looked kinda mediocre. Then the southern weather had at it. Already numerous chips, scrapes and fades. Whatever. I stopped caring.
You'd think that'd be the end of this part. But no. There's more. What's behind door number 3? If you guessed a dumbass with a knife stuck in his ass. Then you'd win the gold! Yeah that's right. My brother got a knife in his ass.... How? How else... He and his friends all got high and decided they were gonna go outside and build a fort in the back yard of the house they rent out of scrap they found laying around. My brother while stoned wanted to show off how he can flip out a butterfly knife really fast, and decided he was gonna act like he was in an action movie, and did some sort of stupid thing where he was running and flipping out the knife really fast. The ground was wet, he slipped, and somehow got the knife in his right butt-cheek. They called me to come take him to the hospital because they were all too stoned to drive. I had to lay my brother down in the bed of my truck on a mattress because we were too scared to pull the knife out, and I drove him to the hospital like that. They rushed him in, and thankfully he only needed about 5 stiches on his butt and some antibiotics. Then I drove him back home the same way, and he insisted I take him to a drive through. He also tried to get me to pay, because...reasons! I told him to buy his own damn food.
After that there was more dumb BS that I won't bother getting into. But eventually my brother was seemingly getting bett...er...less bad. He was a bit sore his Silverado wasn't a 4X4, and my Tundra is. But being RWD kept him from trying to take it off-roading. He did try once, and had to pull the truck out of mud with a come-along. And he didn't try it again. He did want to drag race my truck again too. I said hell no. Not gonna risk either of our piles breaking down. And he was a complete douche about that too. I told him to stop acting like his dick was bigger than it is, and act his age. He didn't take that well. But he seemingly really was improving. Even being a much better dad to his daughter. Things got pretty good for him. Until I decided to buy a house. That's when the serious drama started.
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My entitled brother threw a massive fit, just because he was mad I bought a house May 6, 2024
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Yeah, I'm aware of several similar stories involving entitled family members wanting houses they have no claim to. But I guess this shit really happens. And it's no picnic when it does.
I suddenly became a homeowner some time ago because friend of mine's grandfather was moving to Florida. And his house was ripe for picking. I knew the old man well. RIP, he passed a few months later from a sudden stroke. Anyway, he offered the house and property to me for 200K. I practically ran to the bank to apply for the loan. The house is a manufactured home from the 80s. But it was remodeled repeatedly by the former owner, and has a separate garage building. The home and property could have gone for more. But he offered the house to me because he knew I'd take care of it. I had 30K saved that made a good down payment. And I was happy to leave my apartment. I'd wanted to eventually move out of there after what my cheating ex did anyway. But that's a story for another time.
As for my brother. Well he went bonkers when he found out I bought a house. He had this repeated history of copycatting me for the past decade. But this... There was no way in hell he could copycat buying a house with his terrible credit and inconsistent income. And he got in an argument with me over how I was just trying to make him look bad by doing something he couldn't. No, I just wanted a damn house. And the price was too good to refuse. Then he told me I should have turned it down because...(He had no good reason) I could practically see his screws getting looser with every dumbass excuse he made as to why I shouldn't have done it. But I pointed out all those excuses were just because I did something he currently can't. And when I bought the house, it had nothing to do with him. I just wanted to be a home owner for the security and extra space. I finally don't have to store my camper at my parents' house. And I have a garage that I can store stuff and tinker in.
I bought a camping cot, he bought a camping cot, went to the gym, he went to the gym, bought good booze, he bought good booze (Or stole it from me), I bought a new TV, be bought a new TV, I bought a truck, he bought a truck, I bought a camper, he bought a camper, I bought a used portable DVD player, he bought a used portable DVD player, I went camping in a specific place, he went camping in that specific place, I bought a house, he...(404 Error! Insert tea kettle noises and Benny Hill chase). He also acted like a complete child toward me when he built his Mini-Ram thing. He actually confronted me and said it was keweler than my boring Tundra, because it was something original. I swear, he did the dumbest mods to that vehicle. Like putting twist studs in the suspension coils to raise the ride height.
Well after weeks of openly fuming about me being a home owner, my brother suddenly acted like he had another brilliant idea. He wanted to move in with me. I laughed at him. Then he ended up demanding I rent one of my rooms to him. And for only $200 a month (Utilities included) because he shouldn't have to pay any more than that since we're family. He flipped his lid when I said fuck no! Then he got our parents involved again. Only this time they actually sided with him at first. Though it was mainly our mother. She and my brother showed up demanding I let my brother move in. And my brother had a shit eating grin on his face that I could tell he was thinking he was getting his way thanks to mommy dearest. I said "FUCK NO!" to both their faces, and my mother cried that I was using foul language to her and being an ass when I had the space now. I called my dad, and he told my mom that he'd warned her I wouldn't do it. And to leave me the hell alone. Mom whined my brother was living out of his camper next to a shabby house he was renting space from. I said that wasn't my problem to fix. And my brother has proven countless times that he cannot be trusted. My brother was fuming to the point of being red with veins popping out. My mom tried one more time to convince me with tears. And that just made me angrier.
I went on a rant that was something like this. Bro can't buy a house, so he wanted to invade mine. I refuse to ever live with my brother again. I would sooner live in the woods without electricity than with him. He's intentionally irritating as all hell. And if I had him as a roommate, I just knew he'd steal my booze, take my stuff, and invade my privacy none-stop. Not. Fucking. HAPPENING! No matter how many tears mom tries using on me. My mom broke down and finally conceded she'd never convince me after that rant. And she had to take my brother by the hand and leave with him because he initially refused to go, and kept begging her to turn back and make me let him move in. And then I yelled to him that it was a laugh that he called me a mama's boy before. Because he'd become exactly that. And this was just like the time he tried to get our mother to make me trade vehicles with him because he felt ashamed to be driving a minivan. He yanked away from mom, then told me to go fuck myself and the horse I rode in on. I laughed and pointed out I didn't ride in on anything, because I was already home. But his rattlecan horse was waiting for him in the driveway. He flipped his lid again, and looked like his head was going to explode. But mom got in front of him, and told him to just go. Then he drove off in his rattlecan Silverado without her. He'd driven her there. And then I had to take her home.
While taking her home, I made things very clear with my mother over why I could never trust my brother again. And his life was not my burden to bear. And then told her how little my brother was offering for rent anyway. Which he'd conveniently not told her. Then I later rented that same room to one of my best friends for $600 a month, and he pays for utilities. The other two rooms are my bedroom and a home office. There's an extra room in the separate garage too. So my mother tried to make me let my brother live in the garage instead. There's enough room in it's storage room for a bedroom. Again I said fuck no. And that's since been turned into another friend's rented room with a bit of a plywood remodel. Yeah, I kinda rented both the spare bedroom and garage room out to friends out of spite. But I wasn't letting my brother live with me in any capacity!
My brother later ended up having a complete meltdown in front of our parents over how he's the older brother. He should be the one who owns a house first. He's supposed to be successful, and I'm supposed to be the big loser in his shadow. Our dad poked him with his cane and told him that's not how life works, and they had a big argument. They told him to get out and not come back until he's cooled off and learned that he's just being a pointlessly jealous asshole.
The next part I post, my brother did the dumbest thing of all.
Edit: I came home late to over 600 comments, and still more pouring in. Far too many for me to answer. So I'll clear some things up here. Yes, I am no contact with my brother. And he's NC with the rest of the family as well. I do have cameras inside and outside my home. And a dash cam too. My brother knows this, and has stayed the fuck away since he left town. I'm told I'm an asshole too. Not arguing that, because it's true. I'm not exactly the nicest guy. But have someone like my brother in your life, and see how peachy you turn out.
Some have mentioned to having siblings just like my brother. Sadly I know very well people like him are increasingly common these days. My dad said a number of times that my brother probably would have ended up dead in an alley if he lived here 50 years ago with the way he behaves. As for our ages. I'm 30, and my brother is 32. I have not given my parents a spare key to my house. One is with a friend, and another is very cleverly hidden.
My house is a manufactured home. But it's not in a trailer park, and has been significantly modified with new siding and a new roof, and has a separate garage building. The previous owner was a former general contractor, and he loved to build and repair. And yes, I do have good insurance.
I keep seeing comments about a clock radio. Pardon me for not getting the reference. But I do own a digital alarm clock that has a built in CD player. Currently plays Tina Turner's Proud Mary to wake me up.
My brother and I were raised pretty evenly. He was always a jerk. But went full asshole after moving out. But our mother didn't favor him. She chewed him out plenty. And she didn't normally side with his stupidity. She just wanted him to live in a better place than in a camper next to a house filled with potheads. Addition: My brother willingly moved into that camper. He was renting half a room in that house of potheads. Then convinced the landlord to let him live in his camper on the property for the same price instead. And he bragged about his camper a lot. Which he has a full gaming center in, complete with PlayStation. He only wanted to invade my house to piss me off and make his cost of living even lower. He also doesn't like camping nearly as much as me. He mainly liked just pissing me off by following me. He loved to make me miserable. In fact, he felt entitled to make me miserable. That's the kind of person he is.
Do I have a restraining order against my brother? Not really. Just didn't bother. Because even if I did, it'd only be for like a year. And my brother wouldn't let something like that stop him if he was truly determined anyway.
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My entitled brother lost his mind and attacked me, his ex, and our father. That got him disowned by the family. But not before I beat the crap out of him May 8, 2024
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Warning: Contains domestic violence, small town drama, and idiocy. Read at own risk.
My brother's major downhill spiral started with jealousy over my house, but only got worse thanks to this next part. He started smoking pot more heavily and drinking harder. And that was making him more aggressive and violent. He got in a brawl outside of a bar for reasons I still don't know. But he got his ass handed to him on a platter. He eventually found out his ex has been seeing someone else. And ironically that someone is another friend of mine. Which was news to me. But it's not like he wasn't around my brother's ex a fair bit. They're both fairly social people, and were also friends for years. Once the secret was out, he confessed to me it wasn't planned. But my brother's ex Sara (Fake name) and my friend just clicked one day about a year ago. This sorta thing can only happen in a town like ours. I admit, Sara is very beautiful. But I've always seen her as a big sister figure ever since she started dating my brother in high school. So I never thought of getting with her myself. She kept her new boyfriend a secret for some time. I didn't even know until someone else spilled the beans. And the word traveled. When my brother found out, that was the last he could mentally take.
My brother was hoping for years that Sara would take him back. But no such luck there. When he lost his mind over the fact my friend was dating Sara, he started hunting for the poor guy. My friend is not a fighter, and a self described beanpole. So that's what I'll call him. Sara seems to like Beanpole because he's everything my brother is not. He isn't really a brave person. And came to me when he found out my brother was looking for him. He has a rather distinctively painted car. So it's easy to spot. My brother caught wind Beanpole was at my place, and came roaring his truck down the street.
When my brother showed up to my house, he started screaming and banging on my door because he wanted to kick Beanpole's ass. And when I refused to let him in, he attacked me. We had a redneck brawl right there in my front lawn. I want to say I won. But the fight only stopped when one of my friend/tenants yelled he was gonna call the cops. I sucker-punched my brother while he was distracted, and told him to never come back to my house again. And if he ever tried to hurt Beanpole again, I'd make sure he'd up in the hospital with two broken legs. This was backed by the other friends/tenants I had there. My brother is an idiot. But even he knew that pissing off my entire friend group was not a good idea. So he picked himself up off the ground and started leaving. But he clearly looked like he wanted to do something to my truck because he stopped and just stood there staring at it with his hands in his pockets, like he was debating scratching the paint with his keys. I yelled at him that I have CCTV. But then he turned around, pulled his pants part way down, and started rubbing his ass directly onto my truck's passenger side door. Then he forced out a nasty fart and said he sharted a little, and laughed like a nutbar when he took off. I immediately got the hose. I'm just glad I didn't leave windows open or doors unlocked. Otherwise he'd have done far worse. And the smell of what he did was pretty much what you'd think.
Everyone already knew Sara was never going to take him back. She avoided dating for years because my brother is so unhinged that she knew he'd do something like this. That's why she and her new boyfriend kept it secret. I went to ice my bruises and call Sara. But my brother was already calling and texting her. Over and over again, he wouldn't stop. He was begging she break up with her boyfriend and take him back. He even said he wanted to marry her and move to the northwest. Not sure why he specified that part of the US. Maybe because we live in the southeast. But she flatly told him no, never again, not happening even if hell froze over. He cried that it wasn't fair, because she was his first love (she wasn't), and they have a daughter together. Then he started sending her flowers, love letters and gifts. She sent them all back. Then she announced online that she and Beanpole had been dating for some time, and recently made plans to eventually move in together. That's when my brother really went off the deep end.
A few hours after he saw that post, my brother got wasted and then barged into Sara's parents' house by body ramming the back door. He actually cut his face because the door had a glass window. But he was so drunk that he didn't notice he was bleeding. Sara understandably freaked out, and my brother grabbed and tried to force her to kiss him. She pushed him away and he hit her for refusing him. He slapped her and threw her to the floor really hard like an angry pimp wanting his money. And his daughter saw it all and started screaming at the top of her lungs. Sara screamed too, and my brother fled. Police were called, and Sara was taken to the hospital. My brother threw her down so hard that she had a dislocated shoulder. My brother was found by police at his camper, where he was even more drunk than before, and half his face was covered in blood. He had to be taken to the hospital, where he got stitches. Then taken to jail. He got charged with trespassing, breaking and entering, and assault. (Surprisingly not DUI too, as he'd actually walked there) When our parents and I found out, well the family finally couldn't take it anymore, and went into an uproar. Our parents had it out with my brother after he bailed himself out from jail, and then he tried to fight our dad when they argued. And no surprise, he tried to blame everything on me.
My brother actually said I let Beanpole steal his woman. But couldn't really explain how. He also refused to believe I did not know until recently. Then he said that Sara was supposed to be his. Dad not only disagreed, but told my brother that he was a fucking disgrace, and that was an absolutely disgusting way to talk about Sara. She's not his property. And then my brother shoved dad as hard as he could. Dad got knocked to the floor, and my brother started kicking him. Dad isn't a small man. But he's old with a bad back and a bad knee. And needs a cane just to get around. Since we knew my brother would only have gotten crazier if he saw me, I was hiding in another room with the door cracked and listening in. I knew he might do something crazy. So I insisted on secretly being in the house when he was confronted. And I'm glad I was, because I came to dad's defense before my brother could do too much damage. I knew we were roughly even in a fight. So I ambushed and hit him in the back with a rubber mallet, and then beat the shit out of him. No police were called that time. I attacked him in defense of our dad. So he probably would have been screwed if he tried to get me charged anyway. And then he'd have gone right back to jail. Someone also once asked me if I enjoyed beating up my brother that day. I did not. I was just in an adrenaline fueled rage protecting my dad. But all things considered, I could have done far worse to my brother with that rubber mallet, as he only really got bruises. My dad gave hm a good smack in the face with his cane too though. But it's just hollow aluminum. Not exactly a damage dealer.
Our parents (mainly my dad) disowned my brother as I threw him out the door. And he spent some time crying on the porch and saying he was sorry and didn't mean it, then switched to saying we could all regret this, and we could go fuck ourselves before finally leaving. My mother spent hours crying. She'd stuck up for him before, and this was how he repaid her. My brother managed to avoid real prison time, or a trial for attacking Sara by taking a guilty plea deal. He signed away custody of his daughter. And Sara got a restraining order against him. My brother got a fine, somehow only a couple months in county jail, probation, has to abstain from alcohol for six months, and he had to pay for the property damage. Sara's dad already put in a new door, and billed my brother for it. My brother also understandably lost his job due to the situation.
Our mother secretly kept in contact with my brother, and agreed to look after my brother's truck and camper while he was serving his two month sentence. And she didn't ok it with dad first. He was pretty pissed at her for going behind his back. But she reasoned that it would be the last thing they ever did for him, because she didn't want my brother to have no place to go after getting out of the clink. And even she made it clear it was the last of her good will towards him too. Once my brother got out of jail, mom drove his truck and camper to a store to meet him, and gave him back the keys. She told me there was barely a word of thanks from him. Mostly just grunts when she tried to get him to talk to her. Dad said he still looked like an ungrateful sod. After that my brother lived wherever he could park his camper for a while until one of his remaining friends somehow got him a new job as a welder in another town 40-ish miles away that he was having to commute to with his camper for a while. But he was back every weekend. Apparently he only got the job by agreeing to work for less than what the job would normally pay. So he could move there permanently as soon as he got the ok from his probation officer. Which said officer didn't make easy I heard. I don't know the red tape of it. But he managed to pull it off. He can't leave the state. But he could still move to another county it seems. He's probably renting a space in a trailer park right now or something. And maybe he's back to doing his side hustle of hauling trash for people.
Before leaving town, my brother showed up outside my house to give me the double middle finger and dance around like a monkey while cursing at me in the street when he knew I was watching from the window. I guess it was his stupid way of trying to get in a last laugh without breaking the law or something. But then I got an idea. I've heard plenty of people say to kill with kindness. So I tried it in my own way. I grabbed an unopened bottle of my favorite honey whisky from the pantry because I know my brother really loves that stuff too. Then I went outside and walked right up to him, and shoved the bottle into his hands. I think it was the last thing he expected me to do in the moment. And I know he'd NEVER willingly break a bottle of good booze. Especially when it's free. Then I told him to have a drink on me to start his new life. I could barely keep myself from laughing when I turned to walk away. When I looked at my CCTV footage later, he actually stood there looking really glum while just staring at the bottle, and then moped back to his truck.
And then he was gone. Off to start his new life as a career welder. My brother is a childish, narcissistic, misogynistic, asshole to an extreme degree. But he's actually damn good at welding. Both with steel and aluminum. Mostly self-taught too. It's practically his only real talent. He's even done basic forging and auto body work. I've seen him do shit with scrap metal I wish I could. But that's the only real compliment I can still say about him. Maybe he'll make a decent new life and career for himself doing metal work elsewhere. He's better off away from us, just like we're better off away from him. He deleted all his social media, and I assume blocked us on everything. Not that we'd bother to contact him. One of his few remaining pothead friends in town told me my brother wants to legally change his name when his probation ends. Knowing him, he'll likely do it.
Things are much more peaceful and far less dramatic without my entitled leech of a brother here. Some part of me missed him for a while. But he's just a terrible person. And the only one who's still missing him, is our mother. She's still kinda broken up about it. But dad has been unwavering that they did the right thing by disowning him. He made his own bed. Now he's lying in it. I doubt my brother will come back any time soon. And if he does, he will not be welcome.
Edit: Got home and cracked open a bag of salt & pepper pork rinds, and was half expecting hundreds of comments like last time. I'm thankful it wasn't. Still, I'm also thankful to everyone who gave their support. To answer some questions I got in comments and DMS. I've got cameras inside and outside my house. Beanpole and Sara are still dating. But they've put off moving in together for now. My niece is doing good. But says she has no daddy anymore. My brother was barely a father to her anyway. Yes I know it was a bit much giving a known alcoholic a bottle of booze. And good booze at that. But I knew he wouldn't be able to drink it for months anyway. Which is why I was trying so hard to hold back laughter when I gave it to him. Besides, he's just gonna drink like a fish on his own dime when his court ordered sober time runs out.
I'm hoping this is the last post about current antics involving my brother. Maybe I'll tell other past stories about him. Or the story of my cheating ex. Still couldn't bring myself to post that. I typed it out and everything. But I guess it still ate at me because I really liked that woman. And yeah, this situation with my brother eats at me too. But he's toxic. And I'm better off without him in my life anymore.
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Related Posts:
My entitled brother wanted my cot and tent for the camping trip
The time my brother stayed over and stole all the alcohol from my fridge
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THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT THE OOP
DO NOT CONTACT THE OOP's OR COMMENT ON LINKED POSTS, REMEMBER - RULE 7

With the Scurvy addition I'm hoping theyll make a few additions for us.
Black Spruce Tea / Drink - This was once a great source of Vitamin C collected from young spruce tree clippings and boiled in a pot. If you've had the beer, you know why most survivalists go after this stuff.
Rosehip Tea needs moderate Vitamin C added to it. Most survivalist know rosehips are very rich in vitamin C.
Honey - even in northern Canada, Alaska, and other sub arctic places bees and bumble bees exist, honey is one of the few things that is naturally well preserved, an effective antibiotic, and is great in making food. (Gives us another target to throw rocks at).
Pemmican - Fat + Cooked Meat + Berries (Rosehips) = Very well preserved way to keep food for emergencies.
Animal Fat - we already get lantern oil from fish, animal fat makes a Good insulator (extra smell), good in cooking, use in Pemmican, lures, and waterproofing.
Licorice Root sometimes grows up in northern areas, great for tea and vitamin C. If you can stomach the taste. In tea its both an antiinflammatory and antibiotic.

I am 33, amab, intersex. 5'7", 240 lbs, take Lisinopril, am a smoker, taking keflex for a gum infection.
last year, suddenly, with no discernable cause, bacon tasted very different. Sort of sweet, sort of plasticky. The taste was not radically offensive, though I stopped eating it for a month or so. No one else in my house could taste the difference. I would test it every now and then, as my grandma, whom I care for, eats bacon nearly every day lol. Eventually the taste became normal.
Now suddenly today, once again, the taste is back to the strange taste from last year. The only change in my daily ritual has been an antibiotic I have been on for a week- but last year I wasn't on one, and the taste only changed today. Any ideas?!

So I got admitted to hospital Monday after a procedure went wrong and I got an infection somewhere in my gut. Anyways so I went there w almost none of my belongings and the first few days were horrendous without all the normal ridiculous stuff I do to keep my skin clean. My hands were peeling etc.
Anyways, they put me on IV & oral AB I believe a mix of erythromycin, keflex & metronidazole. So as I said the first few days were terrible I kept moisturising my hands and still getting all the normal black crap out of my skin and my skin bring all wrinkly etc. havent itched at all since I've been in here. 1 day I took hald an adderall when I was in here and all the black stuff came back.
My friend bought some of my thing in 2 days ago and I literally touched my laptop and my entire hand & arm started itching and I quickly put it away and now am scared to touch it. But the other thing is now I moisturise and it's been 5 days in here on AB and the debris hasn't stopped but has greatly reduced. My fingers only wrinkle when I touch my pants I came in with or my hair and I feel like if I were in hospital another month on AB I'd surely be cured. Also all my nails have grown back in 5 days and before I came in they were all chipped and stopped growing.
I'm not sure what we can take from this I almost want to do something to make myself sicker as I'm getting better and they will discharge me anyway now and I keep just thinking nooo I can't go back to my possessions or my car or anything from my life.
I don't know what we can take from this, except that multiple antibiotics when combined with a totally new sterile environtment likely offers some kind of cure. I'm fairly certain if I just had the AB and I was at home with all my infected possessions that I'd still be screwed.
Does anyone have any ideas on how to just start over from scratch? Or any ideas on how to leverage this into something useful lol. 🤔
Fk, im kinda leaning towards throwing everything I have out and ordering antibiotics from overseas and just wandering the earth til I'm cured. If I have no possessions and I just buy new clothes daily and throw them out and sleep in a diff bed every night. Idk what to do bout my cat but I can't go back to morgellons. Part of me hates hospital but it's been so nice just to get away from this disease for a week.

Original post.
Wanted to share a follow-up and hopefully it can help others who may be going through a similar experience. I know this sub and all of your anecdotes was invaluable when I was first diagnosed and hopefully I can give back in the same way.
About two weeks ago, I met with the surgeon and had my first consultation to schedule surgery. I was a bit nervous as I didn't quite know the severity of the situation since my PCP was on vacation and I was left to my own googling to translate all of the notes. When I arrived, the surgeon was a bit late which only added to the anxiety but it turns out he had an emergency surgery he was called into so it ended up being fine in the end.
The surgeon confirmed the colovesical fistula however to my relief, he said that it was just an abscess and the colon has not begun leaking into my bladder as of yet. He emphasized that I was pretty lucky with how I became symptomatic so rapidly (though it didn't feel that way at the time!) and because of this, it was caught very early and the surgery should be much simpler as a result. Basically he went through all the risks and their odds quite thoroughly (ostomy, sepsis, etc) and described all of the things I can do now to ensure the surgery is successful. This includes a diet, regular exercise, pre-surgery prep, and of course staying on antibiotics up until the day of surgery. If any symptoms pop back up (more on this later) then I need to notify them immediately as it becomes a risk of complications. Robot surgery is scheduled for July 25th, which seems a bit far out but the surgeon felt given the stage I'm in it shouldn't be a major risk.
After reading everyone's experiences here, I was expecting the diet to be pretty restrictive but honestly it's not that bad. 5-10 servings of vegetables per day, no fried food, no beef, only lean protein, etc. Exercise is already something I regularly do though it has been a bit difficult at times since the antibiotics (Keflex) lowers my blood pressure quite a bit and makes me a bit tired/dizzy. I've been mostly able to power through.
Everything was going fine up until about 4-5 days ago when suddenly I felt the UTI symptoms slowly starting to return. I thought it might be because I was on a lower dose of Keflex (250mg 1x per day instead of 500mg 4x per day) so I sent a note to the surgeon on Sunday night. First thing Monday morning, they gave me a ring, had me do a urine culture and immediately switched me to 875-125 Augmentin 2x per day. I've only been on the Augmentin for about 36hrs now and the UTI symptoms have started to subside again thankfully.
I've been incredibly impressed with how thorough, informative, and welcoming the surgeons office has been. I've had several surgeries for various injuries in the past and often surgeons can be dicks, but this has probably been by far the best experience I've had. They're super quick to respond and take tons of time to explain every detail to you so you're set up for success. If you're in the Portland metro area, Dr. Butler at Legacy Good Samaritan has been awesome.
Now we just wait. Most of the anxiety is calmed as I feel I'm in good hands. The only thing that worries me a bit is I have a work trip to France from May 25-June 5 but the surgeon and his assistant said it shouldn't be too much worry. Just monitor symptoms and if I do need to switch antibiotics again for some reason, it's not too difficult to while I'm there. Just gotta be sure to buy travel insurance!

Please note this is the original submission I sent Refinery29. In the current post,they have given me a second credit card with a 100$ balance, as well as generational trauma from World War II and cut context for other things. I am trying to get that fixed.
Per previous discussion in comments here: The espresso machine is a Bezzera, which ranges from 2-5K. We got ours on sale for 1.7K, it’s a work house and we use it everyday, still hurts that we spent that money on a coffee maker.
I do understand mortgage is debt but when you compare it to rent to a lesser value condo in Vancouver it feels like not debt at all, which is how I tend to think of it. Yes I owe my mortgage but also I get my house instead of renting-which may not have become clear.
Please see in full the diary, below (edit for formatting via mobile)
Occupation: Sr Business Analyst
Industry: Tech
Age: 30
Location: Vancouver Island, BC
Salary: 92,000$ (Spouse makes 60,000$ for a combined income of 152,000$ before tax)
Net Worth: ~ 1.2 Million ( house is valued at 989,000$ currently, we have a combined 150,000 in pension, and ~60,000 in various company stocks, and GICs)
Debt: 3,000$ in a zero interest credit card for a 10 month period. We balanced transferred and pay 400$/month. Debt was acquired in Q4 2023 when we had to buy Snow Tires, and do a full break replacement as well as Christmas. 480,000$ in a mortgage, we refinanced in September 2023 for five years fixed rate at accelerated biweekly, however I don’t consider our mortgage debt due to the equity we are gaining, and that our mortgage for a five bedroom, 3 bath single family home is less than rent for a two bedroom condo in Vancouver
Paycheck Amount (Every 2 Weeks): 2,555$ after taxes. (Just mine). Spouse makes 2,308$ after taxes. Our pay periods are alternating.
Pronouns: She/her
Monthly Expenses Mortgage: 1450$ biweekly (100$ extra to the principal).
Utilities: ~200$ (includes water [paid quarterly], hydro [paid bimonthly], gas, sewetrash [paid quarterly] phone [highly discounted due to work plans for spouse and myself] and car gas) Loan Payments: 400$/Credit Card
Car Insurance: 84$
Life Insurance: 167$ combined (67$ me, 100$ spouse)
Health & Dental Insurance: 60$ deducted from pay (coverage for myself and spouse from my employer. Spouse also has coverage for both of us deducted from pay)
Retirement Contribution: 400$ (Employee matches me), (Spouse has a defined pension through work and contributes ~200$ month)
Union fees: 70$ Spouse
Subscriptions: Crave 22$/month (Recent splurge for Binge watching the Rookie), Playstation Plus 100$ (annual bought on Black Friday Deal), Amazon Prime 80$ (Annual), BCAA 120$ (annual) Gym 30$/month (we both have one so 15$/pp)
Note: My spouse and I have completely commingled finances. I will be tracking both as it’s essentially I spent whatever they spent
Was there an expectation for you to attend higher education? Did you participate in any form of higher education? If yes, how did you pay for it?
There was always the expectation. My father was very clear, we were very smart. There was no way we’d be wasting our potential. He wanted me to be a lawyer, but unlike other immigrant parents, I got to choose my major and went into social sciences and got my masters in history. I deferred my PhD too much so I got dropped by the program.
I chose my university by where I got a full first year scholarship and then after that took about 15k in student loans for my undergraduate. My parents paid my rent and I got a part time job for food.
For my masters, I had a student line of credit and 5 k student loans otherwise it was all my savings and scholarships. With the line of credit, I had a total of 30K in student loans and paid it off in about four years.
Growing up, what kind of conversations did you have about money? Did your parent(s)/guardian(s) educate you about finances?
Save. We talked about how you get a dollar allowance and half of it goes into long term saving with 25% in short term and 25% in spend.
Investing came after I was eighteen. Family would like us to invest in property, however I don’t really want to be a landlord, but also we wouldn’t get to really enjoy profit of owning a rental property due to other family circumstances.
What was your first job and why did you get it?
Ice cream parlour I was twelve and my parents made me get it for responsibility. I lasted three weeks because I hated it.
Did you worry about money growing up?
I grew up thinking we were not rich, because we didn’t get big plane vacations (I didn’t count flying from Toronto to Vancouver every summer as a vacation since we were just seeing family but staying in a house my parents owned) and I had only been to Disney twice.
But we had a big new build house in the rich end of town, my mom stayed home to raise all of us. We had to work for things (like going to see a movie opening night or a new CD) but we always had money and got what we wanted. In retrospect, my family was/is fairly well off.
Both my parents grew up poor, with parents working multiple jobs and different shifts to make ends meet, the strive/drive to not have that childhood, and for my father to be able to retire his parents really impacted mine and my siblings and cousins lives. My father showed me the apartment he grew up in Chinatown a few years back. It’s light years away from the house my grandparents owned when I was a kid and how I grew up.
Do you worry about money now?
Of course. Inflation is real and we are actively planning a wedding for the next year, as well as a baby in the next few years. We also need to buy a second car, so we’re saving for that.
At what age did you become financially responsible for yourself and do you have a financial safety net?
Fully financially responsible? Twenty five. I lived in a family property where I didn’t pay rent in one of the most expensive cities in Canada, so even though I paid all my bills (food and phone), I didn’t have to pay rent. I in fact made money, as I rented rooms out and used the income for house utilities, and paying my student loans down faster. When I moved in with my spouse, I just paid condo fees until we bought our house two years ago which gave me plenty of time to save.
Our financial safety net is family, and our savings. I know my family would bail us out. My spouse’s father would as well. Conversely, we are my spouse’s mother's safety net and we have to keep all our plans in mind that we will be subsidising her.
Do you or have you ever received passive or inherited income? If yes, please explain. Yes, I received 50K from my parents once they sold my childhood home, as did both of my siblings. I have also received 10K from one set of grandparents which paid off my car and part of my student loans when I was 21. I will be receiving another inheritance when probate is done for around ~100K. My spouse also has received inheritance which allowed them to buy their first condo in their early twenties when the market was much better. That condo, 50k, and the subsequent upgrading helped us afford our house.
Day 1
10 AM: I drive to the pharmacy to pick up a prescription. Not how I want to start my Sunday morning but y’know. Normally I’d walk since it’s about 20 minutes but I have a UTI. I’m “lucky” that despite not having a dr because of the health care shortage, my work pays for the Maple app so I could get a dr to write the prescription and order the lab work at 1 am. I’ll do the lab work later this week when I can get an appointment but will take the relief now. Insurance makes the antibiotics free, but I also buy hydrogen peroxide because we’re out and we have a dog that thinks everything is meant to be in her mouth. We’ll buy a bigger one at Costco later. I also bought some oral wound mouthwash because we were out. I come home and my spouse made us breakfast.
Total: 15.90$ paid with debit.
1-2:30 PM: We do our taxes. I have a mini meltdown when I realize the part time bakery job I had for a few months didn’t take off income tax last year, so I owe 800$. Luckily, my partner is getting a refund so we net out positive 400$. The bakery took off income tax in 2022, so unsure why they didn’t in 2023. I made us lunch.
3-6:30 PM: We walk the dog, and watch the Rookie. Some time during that time period, a venue emails us back and is surprisingly affordable at 3k. I also get told that the tattoo artist I want to book with, has not chosen me.
6:30-7:30 PM: I explain what lazy girl dinner is to my spouse and make a lazy girl dinner. After not really grocery shopping since Feb for things besides fresh veg, we need to do a big pantry shop and neither of us want that. We debate about buying a food saver and if we should wait for a sale. My spouse is more frugal than me and has determined we should.
8-9:30 PM: We start season 3 of The Rookie, and then after two episodes we go to bed
Day One Total: 15.90$
Day Two
5:45-8 AM: Wake up and start work. I get up to date with what’s happened on the weekend and check that my automated reports. Sometime before 6:30, I get the kettle on for my spouse’s pour over before I go back to my meetings. There’s a twenty minute gap where I get changed and do my skin care and brush my teeth. I’d love to be a skin care person but honestly I’ve spent too much money on product that I don’t use and that just goes bad. Washing my face and using sun screen is a win.
I also make sure that Spouse’s lunch is in his bag and I get our travel mugs ready. Before, we used to go to Starbucks every day. Starbucks used to do free refills on coffee and tea if you were a rewards member if you bought a coffee or tea so it would cost us $5/day (2.5/pp), and we could get refills all day. While that’s 20$/week, 80$/a month and yes, we could have saved it but back then, that 80$ wasn’t turning the dial anywhere significantly for us—a privileged view.
But now, after COVID where I stopped drinking tea after one day working from home having like 10 cups and thinking I was dying, and Spouse has bought a good grinder and we recently splurged on a stupidly expensive espresso machine we call his Engagement Espresso since it costs the same price as my stupidly expensive ring, we bring our coffees.
8-8:30 AM: We drive to work. Prior to buying our house, we were both work from home and lived in a city with amazing transit. We only needed the one car. Since buying the house and moving to a city where public transit is a joke (the one bus goes past our house every 1.5h), Spouse changed jobs and is in office every day and I have to go in 3 days a week. We need a second car or the e-bike rebate to come through. We debate this in the car, since I’m done at 1 pm, and Spouse works normal hours, I either have to take the bus home, or go to the gym for three hours. Today though, I drop Spouse off. I will pick him up later as he has a half day because of the dentist
8:30-12:30 AM/PM: Work. I find a tech manager and ask them to get me more triple a batteries. Work won’t provide or let me expense batteries for my mouse, despite them replacing my usb mouse with a battery one. The poor admin had to tell me the decision is that we’ll all supply our own batteries. Luckily the tech managers have to have batteries on hand and give them out freely.
I ask my boss how the work from home tax forms work, and he is going to find out.
I run more meetings and work on a request for a dashboard and a business case for a new feature that I have to convince leadership to spend money on.
12:30-1 PM: I drive back to my Spouse because he has a dentist appointment.
While I wait for a spouse, I am incredibly hungry. I’m usually not hungry/don’t eat a proper meal until around 1 in the afternoon and my two granola bars I already ate at the office. I go to the bakery by Spouse’s work and buy a cheese bun for me (3.65$), and an apple pie scone (2.55$) for Spouse as a snack. Spouse points out he won’t be able to eat until after his appointment.
Total: 6.20$ debit
1-1:30 PM: I drop Spouse off, and the car stops working. The engine won’t catch. I try multiple times and then run into the dentist to dramatically announce to Spouse and the receptionists that the car won’t start. Spouse asks me what he wants me to do about this, since he’s about to go into an appointment. A very kind receptionist tells me it might be the alternator. I don’t know what that is.
I go back to the car to Facetime my father. He also asks what I think he can do to help since he lives 3000 km away. Weirdly, and sexistly, I thought a man who grew up at race tracks, in a racing family, or the man who has collected and worked on sports cars for forty years might be able to help.
Spouse texts me to remind me we have BCAA while my father also tells me that. I finally get the engine to catch and drive the very long way home, going the speed limit and getting stuck in traffic, construction and a bus. It takes me 20 minutes to get home instead of 10.
1:30-2:30 PM: I walk the dog, mail a (late) birthday card and then start researching what an alternator is. The car is over a decade old and until the house, the most expensive thing I ever bought at 12K back in 2015. We have the funds for the cost, but it’s my first car and the fact it might be the end of its life is scary.
Alternators can cost between 400-800$ repair with labour, so that’s fun.
My dad calls me back and apologises for asking me what he could do away. He advises me that there’s probably a bald spot on the alternator and advises me to go to the mechanic to check or replace it, if the car doesn’t start again.
I call the mechanic to book an appointment, and to also get the snow tires off and to buy new rims for the snow tires. The mechanic lets me know that the alternator part is 500$, and an hour of labour so with taxes we’re looking at around 700$
That future appointment next week (we’re going down a highway this weekend which requires snow tires) will cost ~1.5K, assuming we replace the alternator.
I make lunch and sigh.
2:30 PM: The car starts thankfully. I drive incredibly slow. I pick up Spouse by idling the car. We get an email back from a venue saying they cost 75,000$ minimum. The timing is hysterical.
Due to the nature of the dentist, Spouse owes 618$, as they haven’t flipped it under my insurance. They split it in half, as he has a follow up in two weeks. After the next appointment they will flip the whole amount under me and we’ll get reimbursed for the whole amount.
Total 309$/credit card.
3-10 PM: We walk the dog, make dinner (Spouse makes white sauce pasta, with chicken and peas) and watch The Rookie. There are thirteen episodes in season three, and we will be busy every night this week besides Friday and Sunday, and I would like to finish season three so we can start season 4 next Monday. I don’t want to pay for more than one month of Crave. We have five episodes left
Day Two Total: 315.2$
Day Three
1 AM: 100$ is automatically transferred from our account to the credit card debit. We have an auto transfer of 100$/every Tuesday to a Visa where we balance transferred both our cards. We have an offer for 0 interest for 10 months, so we did that for some of the bigger expenses (snow tires, break replacement and general Christmas) and are on track to pay it back within the next 6 months. That visa is our emergency card that we just have in the back end and utilise for promos like this. It allows us to keep our two cards balances manageable and lets us pay in an easier way than taking big chunks out of our various savings.
Total: 100$/direct deposit
5:45-9 AM: Work. Meetings, reports, trying to convince a colleague that the process does include them and refusal to follow it means that their requests won’t be done. Spouse has another half day so I can go into the office at my leisure—if the car starts
9-9:20 AM: The car starts, I get into the office and refresh a data flow before a meeting with a new stake holder. It takes longer to drive into work today because the tourists are starting to come and their van builds or campers are not exactly highway speed and with a two lane highway, if you don’t merge over fast enough you’re stuck.
10:05-10:20 AM: Meeting done, car starts again and I drive home for more meetings. The least amount of time in the office is preferable for me.
10:30-11AM : Meeting with my manager where we discuss future salary and promotion. I am due for a promotion in the start of Q2, which would push me to six figures. I’ll believe it when I see it but, I’m really excited at that possibility for my family.
11:15 AM: Spouse leaves for work, we discuss what groceries are needed, as well if he’ll go to Home Depot tonight to buy more clover seeds for the yard, as we need to reseed before it starts raining. I eat a muffin and my dog and cat decide to try and eat each other.
11:15-1:30 PM: Work runs late. There’s some issues with the data and we can’t figure it out. We call it a night, and I’ll record the video presentations tomorrow, once we fix the data.
1:30-4 PM: Nap time! It’s bad for me, but honestly I don’t sleep well during the night so naps are what keep me alive.
4-6 PM I prep dinner (smash burgers and fries), and get chores done and walk the dog.
6-7:30 PM: Spouse comes home, we eat dinner. Groceries come to 96.83 for two 7 pound pork loins, two packs of bacon, chicken nuggets, coffee, pop, 8 pack of peppers, milk, tomato, pickles, rice, avocado, mushrooms, sour cream and lettuce.
Not too bad, we average about 300$/month in groceries because we can buy bulk and have a second freezer.
For the month of March we are currently at 123.61$ for groceries and there is twelve days left. We went on a small weekend away, so we ate out a fair bit but even then our current food budget is 272.27$ today.
Total: 96.83/ debit
7:30-10 PM: Spouse makes a coffee and plays video games with his friends. They do it every week. I have a shower, fold and put away laundry and read in bed.
Day Three Total: 196.83
Day Four
1AM: Our biweekly accelerated mortgage payment comes out of 1450$. I’m tracking it here to be honest on our spending but I tend not to think of it as money spent because in my head it’s already money gone. To pay for a house equivalent in Vancouver, the mortgage would be over 6k. Renting a two bedroom condo would be 3K. It feels like the mortgage is just cheaper rent, even though each time I own more of my house.
5:45-9 AM: Work. I find out the limits of how many people I can invite to a Teams Meeting as well as that the Thursday before Good Friday is a catholic holiday when a few people ask me to reschedule a training forum for over a thousand people. Sometime in there I make us coffee, make sure Spouse has lunch packed (leftovers). Spouse has walked the dog and has the recycling and compost out for pick up. I drop Spouse off at work.
10-11:45 AM: I leave the office for home and more meetings. I walk the dog and go record training videos. I get an email that Amazon is doing their big spring sale. I send a link to a robot mop and vaccum that’s on a big discount to Spouse. We want one, but I’m not in charge of the research on it. I send links to play grounds to my friends with toddlers
11:45-12:30 PM : I shove lunch in my mouth, last night’s left overs. I’m running late, and decide to get myself later by collecting all the random dishes and mugs that just show up places and start the dishwasher. I get to the lab ten minutes early but need to buy gas on the way home.
I tell my team I’ll be MIA for a bit and leave the work phone in the car.
I buy 15.6L of gas for 30$ at 1.879/l it sucks. I don’t fill up because we’re going to my in laws this weekend and there’s a Costco Gas Bar there.
Total: 30$/credit card
12:30-1:30 PM: Work goes long again.
1:30-2:30 PM: Nap!
2:30-4:30 PM: Walk the dog and drive to the gym. I usually go three times a week but with last week’s weekend away and this week’s weird half days from Spouse, today’s the only day. I make it up by doing both upper and lower body and a 30 minute circuit.
4:30-7:30 PM: I pick up Spouse and we go to Costco. We pick up nachos, ham, cheese buns and some other items. We debate buying our friend’s kid a toddler set of clothes and decide no. We end up buying work pants for Spouse, and a garden hose. It comes out to 116.90
I order our Costco dinner of hot dogs and fries for a grand total date night of 6.41$
Total: 123.31/ credit card
8-9 PM: Dance class! We bought a series of six lessons of introduction to ballroom back in December for a new date night idea. We paid 60$/pp and this is the fifth lesson tonight.
9 pm: We’re home, we let the dog out. Spouse spends an undetermined amount of time watching ballroom videos while I sleep.
Day Four Total: 1603.31$ or 153.31 excluding the mortgage payment.
Day Five
5:45-9 AM: Work. All the meetings. Thursday is the meeting day. I debate with a friend what’s the earliest call we’ve had. 4:30 am still wins. I pack lunch for Spouse and his coffee and he leaves. I end up cleaning up cat puke as the cat decides to drink milk from Spouse’s cereal and vomit it up on camera in a meeting.
9-9:30 AM: I make myself a matcha and walk the dog.
9:30-1 PM: Work and I treat myself to a lunch of a cheese bun and ham sandwhich. We used to eat it every Sunday while growing up but the cost of ham has been outrageous. The deal at Costco yesterday was 1.5$/100 g which is really good.
1-1:30 PM: I seal the wooden deer Christmas decoration we bought last year. It sits outside our front door and needs to be weather proofed, and I’ve been putting it off for five months. But the weather is good and we have newspapers. We have left over wood sealer after the sign we bought a year ago so I use that. The dog and the cat both don’t like my wooden deer.
1:30-4 PM: Nap!
4-5 PM: I basically just watch youtube and drink a root beer. I have no energy.
5-6:30 PM: Spouse comes home, we walk the dog and I make dinner (Kraft Dinner and nuggets–I swear we eat veggies but today is not that day). We discuss the possibility of our dog at our wedding as a flower girl, and if she’ll be in a tutu or a cheongsam like me. I am now researching if they make dog cheongsams and if she can match us. The cat, despite all my heart wanting it, won’t physically be there because he will have an anxiety attack and probably die.
6:30-10:30 PM: Board game night! We go to a friend’s to repeat the same scenario we’ve lost two weeks in a row.
10:30-11 PM: I pack Spouse’s breakfast (oatmeal and frozen berries), lunch (spicy tuna and mayo) since he’s trying to go to the gym before work, and feed the animals before we go to bed.
Day Five Total: 0$
Day Six Friday
5:45-9 AM: Work. I have a deep focus block which means I can get the script for the training I have to run. Public speaking is not my strong suit and it’s a group of a thousand people so I’m not looking forward to it. Spouse almost makes it to the gym. I get an email that my new work phone has shipped. I’m surprised because they wouldn’t order us any for the past four years, but I guess my new iPhone will show up next week. I might give my old work phone to my mother in law, since she smashed the camera on the phone we bought her last year.
9-9:30 AM: I walk the dog, make a matcha and make a todo list for what we have to get done before we leave to my in laws tomorrow. I text my mother in law happy birthday, and hope that she got the card in time. She did.
9:30-11:30 AM: My last meeting for the week ends and I’m debating calling it a day so I can nap. Instead I make lunch (cheese bun and ham), text my other mother in law our plan for Saturday, and unload and reload the dishwasher and go back to work for at least another hour.
12:30-1 PM: I shower and do skin care
1-3 PM: Nap! Somewhere in this time FedEx comes and since I’m sleeping, we have to pick up on Monday. I’m not too sure what it is, I assume it’s our custom address stamp from Etsy because that’s the only thing I’ve bought recently but not too sure. I just realized in retrospect, this might be my new work phone.
3-5 PM: I prep dinner (nachos), unload the dishwasher, pack my overnight bag and confirm all our venue tours by email. I start a load of laundry and do a quick clean. I feel like this is not the best image of our diet. I swear we generally eat healthy but we both have been feeling really blah over the past two weeks so have been going for quick and easy over healthy and balanced. I do have three whole peppers and two whole avocados in the nachos though.
5-7 PM: Spouse comes home, we walk the dog, have dinner, and plan out next week. We have a big Wednesday next week (mechanic, I have a nails appointment, dance class), and we are having our friends over for Easter so we need to prep for that. We pack the car so tomorrow is a very easy start.
Spouse also gets paid today. We’re lucky that we’re on alternating pay periods, we used to be on the same and it always felt stressful. Spouse also lets me know his union has secured a 3% cost of living raise to start in Q3. I really like his union for negotiating a base 2% year of cost of living raise, with potential addition raises depending on inflation. It’s a bit away but that’s still good news.
7:30-10:30 PM: We finish The Rookie Season 3 and head to bed. Crave reminds me that I have 10 days until I’m charged again. Sadly, I think we’ll have to pay for 2 months.
Day Six Total: 0
Day Seven Saturday
8:30-9:30 AM: Wake up. No one (except the dog) slept well so we’re not in a morning mood. Spouse makes coffee and walks the dog, while I finish packing the car and give the cat a lot of attention. Our first venue tour is at 11 and the one that is the most expensive (8-10K), but also the one we probably want the most. We live about an hour away but the highway is two lanes and one accident can back everything up for hours.
10:40-1 PM: We visit our dream venue. We stay way longer than expected. Basically if the quote is under 10K, we’ll get it. Just waiting now.
1-2 PM: We get to our in-laws and have a lunch of egg salad sandwhichs. We need to buy gas. My in laws drive us to a pottery painting store.
2-4 PM: We paint pottery. My mother in law only wanted to do this for her birthday. They’ll pick it up in a week after it’s been thrown. I paint a vase (28$), Spouse paints an Easter egg (18$), father in law paints a mug (30$), and mother in law paints a plate (50$)
Total:143.36/credit card
4-5 Pm: We see another venue. It’s an instant no. My in laws decide they want to try Korean fried chicken. We call ahead for take out to get two fries and 16 pieces of half and half. It comes to 50.83$ that my in laws pay for.
5-10 PM: We come back and see that our dog has pooped in their house and also has gotten into their pantry and eaten an entire bag of dog food. It is not a fun night.
We spend the night drinking wine and discussing the wedding and watching TV.
10PM: We go to bed. That’s the end of this week, but tomorrow we will be buying gas and probably lunch for my other mother in law as we will be touring another venue.
Day Seven Total: 143.36$

Hey,
As a recap, my condition started last December, following a UTI, which got successfully treated with antibiotics. Urgency remained after all samples were clear, together with a wetness feeling in the head of the penis.
Urgency went away after dealing with anxiety / stress via mindfulness and SSRIs.
Wetness feeling in the penis mostly went away through 3 months of daily stretches and PFPT.
I’ve not drank coffee or alcohol for months now. Had two beers the other day which seems to have flared me up a bit, but it subsided after a day or two.
What remains are: - occasional wetness when I sit a lot - discomfort in tip of penis after passing stool - and (this is new) mild discomfort in lower stomach/bladder especially after urinating
No pain, no urgency, mostly symptom free except after urination or passing stool, with the exception of mild bladder discomfort.
Still going for PFPT, still doing daily stretches, still on SSRIs.
The question is… anybody know how to “close this” for good and go this last let’s say 20% of the way?

Long 2 months, desperate for answers! Very detailed!
I’m so desperate for help, advice, answers, experiences (anything!) from someone/anyone who may have experienced or is going through the same as me!
In March 2024, I had a horrible sore throat so naturally I went to get tested for strep, Covid, and the flu. My rapid test came back negative for all 3 and the next day I was completely back to feeling great. 3 days later I get a call that my strep culture came back positive but I wasn’t prescribed any antibiotics because I was symptom free.
Early April 2024 I very suddenly came down with a high fever and body aches (with no warning signs or any other cold symptoms). Got tested again, everything was negative and I was fine within 24 hours.
**1 week later on the tail end of my period I developed horrible vaginal pain and sensitivity to the point I couldn’t sit down. My vulva was so irritated that it became raw and was bleeding light pink externally. I went to a woman’s clinic where they swabbed me. took a urine culture, and prescribed me bactrim while we waited for the test results. The test came back positive for strep 2 days later and a very high count of white blood cells (the untreated strep from march travelled through my system south!!! Didn’t even know this was possible). That same day I ended up in the hospital for a fainting spell, confusion, and nausea. After more testing the doctor found that the antibiotic wasn’t treating the infection so he prescribed Keflex 4X/day for 7 days. By day 2 I was feeling so much better (vaginal pain and all other irritations were fully resolved!)
5/1/2024 (5 days after finishing the keflex) I woke up with a severe sore/swollen throat and tested positive for Strep throat AGAIN. Here goes round 2 of antibiotics, now prescribed cefdinir 2x/day for 10 days. 2 days in once again, feeling great and took the 10 days finally felt better than I had in 2 months. I finished the cefdinir this past Friday (it’s now Monday) ….
I got my period yesterday (Sunday) and it was extremely heavy, much heavier than usual. Accompanied by severe cramps. Today mid morning I developed the same exact vaginal symptoms I had before testing positive for vaginal strep A!! The same rawness, tender, swollen feeling all external. Just a pad touching the area is excruciating pain and I can’t even fathom using a tampon.
What could this be? Strep again?! pH imbalance from the 2 rounds of antibiotics?! The blood from my period being such a high pH?! As I’m writing this all out I’m wondering if my period last month is what trigged the symptoms of the vaginal strep.. the month between my periods my vagina was completely healthy and feeling fine! HELP!
(Ive been tested for STDs which have all come back negative. I’m in a monogamous relationship (for 8 years). He was tested for strep orally and the results were negative)

Long 2 months, desperate for answers! Very detailed!
I’m so desperate for help, advice, answers, experiences (anything!) from someone/anyone who may have experienced or is going through the same as me!
In March 2024, I had a horrible sore throat so naturally I went to get tested for strep, Covid, and the flu. My rapid test came back negative for all 3 and the next day I was completely back to feeling great. 3 days later I get a call that my strep culture came back positive but I wasn’t prescribed any antibiotics because I was symptom free.
Early April 2024 I very suddenly came down with a high fever and body aches (with no warning signs or any other cold symptoms). Got tested again, everything was negative and I was fine within 24 hours.
**1 week later on the tail end of my period I developed horrible vaginal pain and sensitivity to the point I couldn’t sit down. My vulva was so irritated that it became raw and was bleeding light pink externally. I went to a woman’s clinic where they swabbed me. took a urine culture, and prescribed me bactrim while we waited for the test results. The test came back positive for strep 2 days later and a very high count of white blood cells (the untreated strep from march travelled through my system south!!! Didn’t even know this was possible). That same day I ended up in the hospital for a fainting spell, confusion, and nausea. After more testing the doctor found that the antibiotic wasn’t treating the infection so he prescribed Keflex 4X/day for 7 days. By day 2 I was feeling so much better (vaginal pain and all other irritations were fully resolved!)
5/1/2024 (5 days after finishing the keflex) I woke up with a severe sore/swollen throat and tested positive for Strep throat AGAIN. Here goes round 2 of antibiotics, now prescribed cefdinir 2x/day for 10 days. 2 days in once again, feeling great and took the 10 days finally felt better than I had in 2 months. I finished the cefdinir this past Friday (it’s now Monday) ….
I got my period yesterday (Sunday) and it was extremely heavy, much heavier than usual. Accompanied by severe cramps. Today mid morning I developed the same exact vaginal symptoms I had before testing positive for vaginal strep A!! The same rawness, tender, swollen feeling all external. Just a pad touching the area is excruciating pain and I can’t even fathom using a tampon.
What could this be? Strep again?! pH imbalance from the 2 rounds of antibiotics?! The blood from my period being such a high pH?! As I’m writing this all out I’m wondering if my period last month is what trigged the symptoms of the vaginal strep.. the month between my periods my vagina was completely healthy and feeling fine! HELP!
(Ive been tested for STDs which have all come back negative. I’m in a monogamous relationship (for 8 years). He was tested for strep orally and the results were negative)

I’m so desperate for help, advice, answers, experiences (anything!) from someone/anyone who may have experienced or is going through the same as me!
In March 2024, I had a horrible sore throat so naturally I went to get tested for strep, Covid, and the flu. My rapid test came back negative for all 3 and the next day I was completely back to feeling great. 3 days later I get a call that my strep culture came back positive but I wasn’t prescribed any antibiotics because I was symptom free.
Early April 2024 I very suddenly came down with a high fever and body aches (with no warning signs or any other cold symptoms). Got tested again, everything was negative and I was fine within 24 hours.
**1 week later on the tail end of my period I developed horrible vaginal pain and sensitivity to the point I couldn’t sit down. My vulva was so irritated that it became raw and was bleeding light pink externally. I went to a woman’s clinic where they swabbed me. took a urine culture, and prescribed me bactrim while we waited for the test results. The test came back positive for strep 2 days later and a very high count of white blood cells (the untreated strep from march travelled through my system south!!! Didn’t even know this was possible). That same day I ended up in the hospital for a fainting spell, confusion, and nausea. After more testing the doctor found that the antibiotic wasn’t treating the infection so he prescribed Keflex 4X/day for 7 days. By day 2 I was feeling so much better (vaginal pain and all other irritations were fully resolved!)
5/1/2024 (5 days after finishing the keflex) I woke up with a severe sore/swollen throat and tested positive for Strep throat AGAIN. Here goes round 2 of antibiotics, now prescribed cefdinir 2x/day for 10 days. 2 days in once again, feeling great and took the 10 days finally felt better than I had in 2 months. I finished the cefdinir this past Friday (it’s now Monday) ….
I got my period yesterday (Sunday) and it was extremely heavy, much heavier than usual. Accompanied by severe cramps. Today mid morning I developed the same exact vaginal symptoms I had before testing positive for vaginal strep A!! The same rawness, tender, swollen feeling all external. Just a pad touching the area is excruciating pain and I can’t even fathom using a tampon.
What could this be? Strep again?! pH imbalance from the 2 rounds of antibiotics?! The blood from my period being such a high pH?! As I’m writing this all out I’m wondering if my period last month is what trigged the symptoms of the vaginal strep.. the month between my periods my vagina was completely healthy and feeling fine! HELP!
(Ive been tested for STDs which have all come back negative. I’m in a monogamous relationship (for 8 years). He was tested for strep orally and the results were negative)

( I POSTED EARLIER BUT NOT SURE I DID IT RIGHT, TRYING Again) SOOOO let me start off with, the reason I'm confused is bc it doesn't make any sense. SO A Month ago I had a Retreat RC with a tooth on top ( endo did the retreat) then I had a tooth pulled that already had a root canal/crown just last week ( last Wednesday), it was also a back top tooth#2, I have been doing salt Walter rinses amd finished my Antibiotics on Saturday. ( it was my 3rd round of Abx my 1st round Amixocillin 7 days was 2 weeks before my Retreat bc my dentist said it may have been a sinus infection bc xrays showed NO INFECTION, went to Endo he started the Retreat with a drain and put Medicine in and sealed it up put me on my (2nd Round Antibiotics ) Keflex for 7 days, then 3 weeks later went back to finish up Retreat root canal, everything went awesome, but he let me know that my back top tooth #2 which had crown/rootcanal was loose and had a crack he could see on the x ray but I had already had a bad taste coming from it which I had already told my dentist, and he said it looked fine and it was probably from the one that was being retreated which he had said that it didn't have any infection ( it was infected based on what endo said, but My Dentist informed me that Endos can see more bc of their equipment, although my Dentist done a xRay that went all away around my head and he had stated he could see everything) so I had called my Dentist to make an appointment to have crown took off to look at it, but then with rge Money adding up so quickly I said let's pull it bc Endo said by what he saw it probably needed pulled and he was correct, it was decayed pretty bad, it's been less than a week it was pulled, but before they pulled it 4 days before I was put on a (3rd round of Abx Amoxicillin 9 days, [it was for 10 days but dropped my bottle and 3 of my pills got soaked] ) went had #2 extracted so far so good, THEN THIS MORNING HAPPENS!!!! Getting to my question, so sorry.
So I brushed my teeth and I have been noticing that bottom tooth # 30 which has also had a root canal with a crown just a couple years ago by my Dentist, has been sensitive and been told that is normal and since I have had the top extraction just 5 days ago I have noticed it is sore maybe from the pressure of biting on guaze trying to get bleeding to stop from the extraction ( I was bleeding for 8 Hrs pretty heavy)I'm not sure, ANYWAY then I noticed a hard Bump that was the color of my skin it was just a Hard bump with NO white on it like a pimple, but it was hard so I called my Dentist they said to come in at 12PM only 3 hrs away, so I was in the car before going in and I pulled the side of my mouth to look at it and pulled tight and then I tasted a salty taste,, ( the pressure from pulling the skin to look at it must have popped it) didn't see anything but BUMP GOT SMALLER, as I'm walking into my Dentist, x ray was done with a visual exam , ( no tapping of teeth or cold/hot sensitivity test just visual and xRay) was glaced at for maybe 10 seconds when I showed him where a very tiny bump remained (bc my dumb butt had to look at it and mess with it before he looked at it, so it popped amd went down quickly)and he gets up takes gloves off and said no sign of infection , so I asked what it was and the taste I explained to him once again, he said IDK I see nothing, he then says maybe a Mucosa Gland but not sure bc nothing is there, I asked if he could see where it was leaking, he said no signs of infection, I remind him I was told the same when I did have infection when he sentt me to the endo. So I felt embarrassed and so stupid and felt so small bc I felt he just didn't believe me bc his tone, didn't even explain anything to me, so abt 6 hrs later it's coming back slowly, amd I called my detist office again to let them know the bump is returning amd sometimes I taste a salty taste,the office staff called me back amd said he said he could put me on anorher round of antibiotics( 4th round) just in case it is an infection or gum boil, or it may just be a mucosa cyst ( i thought cyst didnt drain?)I reminded them I had just finished a 9 day ABX ( my 3rd round) not even 48 hrs ago, then I told her I wanted to ask him questions bc I never had a " Abcess/ Gum Boil/Mucosa Cyst, but he literally was in that room with me MAYBE 1.5 MINUTES, she asked me what would I need to know, I then changed the subject amd asked what should I do going foward, Their Amswer since I'm" denying" My 4th round of Antibiotics within a month and a half was to see if it keeps coming back, maybe wait a month or so, touch base if any significant change and go from there. I asked if maybe I should go to an oral surgeon for them to glance at it. I was told no , I couldn't get a referral let's just wait and see, I explained to them if IF it's an infection I would take my 4th round of Antibiotics but he said it wasn't an infection this morning , amd I asked twice as he was walking out if he was sure it wasn't t an infection, he stated NO It isn't, then while walking down the hall I asked him one more time if he was sure it wasn't an infection he said NO, if it was am abcess it would show up on xray. He then stated real loud NOTHING NOTHING Is there and IF something Appears call us, I felt so small. But I did call, and I still have NO ANSWERS after paying $110.00 today for NOTHING!!!! I also have Crohns so being on alot of Antibiotics cam really mess me up, amd ir it's truly not an infection you don't need an Antibiotic, or so I thought. So I said and explained all that, to ask, is it possible to have a "Gum boil" without any infection? The hard Bump is not right under tooth #30, it's more over we're #29 ( but #29 is gone just empty space) so it's way down on gums Like where your inside cheeks go down and meet ur gums, I hope I'm explaining that right, anyway again it's not right up under tooth #30 I would say if #29 was there it would be under that tooth all the way down past gums where gums meets ur cheeks. ( when I'm home I may be able to get a picture to explain better) but again #30 has been sore and hurting off and on since extraction again I thought it was from me bitting down on that guaze all those hrs, I had alot of pressure on them, but before that I had explained to them that it was sensitive to sweets, amd some colds was told it was normal, so again here are my questions!!
What could it be if it isn't infection?
Should I get a 2nd opinion?
If it's an abcess , are abcess hard to leak out, does it take alot to pop am abcess? ( again there was no white pimple looking bump or any blood or pus that leaked out it was just clear n salty, amd the color of bump was the color of my gums)?
How fast do abcess fill back up if it's an infection amd would it hurt and could u see where it leaked or popped fluid from? Would it look like a sore after it pops? ( mine hasn't filled all the way up as it was this morning but i can tell it's coming back, it's slow.
Should I take another 4th round of Antibiotics without knowing it's a true infection?
I have spent $2,800 in the past Month and half, and I'm so scared I'm gonna have to lose another tooth bc I can't afford another Retreat, and I'm scared my dentist doesn't really care or maybe just doesn't know, but being told to wait it out, if it's am abcess wouldn't that be dangerous? I hope I explained amd to anyone that cares to explain anything to me abt what you think my Dentist is thinking please explain to me bc I don't even know. All I l ow to do, is wait and see what happens. And was told to try to wait atleast a month. THANKS and GOD BLESS!!!!

SOOOO let me start off with, the reason I'm confused is bc it doesn't make any sense. SO A Month ago I had a Retreat RC with a tooth on top ( endo did the retreat) then I had a tooth pulled that already had a root canal/crown just last week ( last Wednesday), it was also a back top tooth#2, I have been doing salt Walter rinses amd finished my Antibiotics on Saturday. ( it was my 3rd round of Abx my 1st round Amixocillin 7 days was 2 weeks before my Retreat bc my dentist said it may have been a sinus infection bc xrays showed NO INFECTION, went to Endo he started the Retreat with a drain and put Medicine in and sealed it up put me on my (2nd Round Antibiotics ) Keflex for 7 days, then 3 weeks later went back to finish up Retreat root canal, everything went awesome, but he let me know that my back top tooth #2 which had crown/rootcanal was loose and had a crack he could see on the x ray but I had already had a bad taste coming from it which I had already told my dentist, and he said it looked fine and it was probably from the one that was being retreated which he had said that it didn't have any infection ( it was infected based on what endo said, but My Dentist informed me that Endos can see more bc of their equipment, although my Dentist done a xRay that went all away around my head and he had stated he could see everything) so I had called my Dentist to make an appointment to have crown took off to look at it, but then with rge Money adding up so quickly I said let's pull it bc Endo said by what he saw it probably needed pulled and he was correct, it was decayed pretty bad, it's been less than a week it was pulled, but before they pulled it 4 days before I was put on a (3rd round of Abx Amoxicillin 9 days, [it was for 10 days but dropped my bottle and 3 of my pills got soaked] ) went had #2 extracted so far so good, THEN THIS MORNING HAPPENS!!!! Getting to my question, so sorry.
So I brushed my teeth and I have been noticing that bottom tooth # 30 which has also had a root canal with a crown just a couple years ago by my Dentist, has been sensitive and been told that is normal and since I have had the top extraction just 5 days ago I have noticed it is sore maybe from the pressure of biting on guaze trying to get bleeding to stop from the extraction ( I was bleeding for 8 Hrs pretty heavy)I'm not sure, ANYWAY then I noticed a hard Bump that was the color of my skin it was just a Hard bump with NO white on it like a pimple, but it was hard so I called my Dentist they said to come in at 12PM only 3 hrs away, so I was in the car before going in and I pulled the side of my mouth to look at it and pulled tight and then I tasted a salty taste,, ( the pressure from pulling the skin to look at it must have popped it) didn't see anything but BUMP GOT SMALLER, as I'm walking into my Dentist, x ray was done with a visual exam , ( no tapping of teeth or cold/hot sensitivity test just visual and xRay) was glaced at for maybe 10 seconds when I showed him where a very tiny bump remained (bc my dumb butt had to look at it and mess with it before he looked at it, so it popped amd went down quickly)and he gets up takes gloves off and said no sign of infection , so I asked what it was and the taste I explained to him once again, he said IDK I see nothing, he then says maybe a Mucosa Gland but not sure bc nothing is there, I asked if he could see where it was leaking, he said no signs of infection, I remind him I was told the same when I did have infection when he sentt me to the endo. So I felt embarrassed and so stupid and felt so small bc I felt he just didn't believe me bc his tone, didn't even explain anything to me, so abt 6 hrs later it's coming back slowly, amd I called my detist office again to let them know the bump is returning amd sometimes I taste a salty taste,the office staff called me back amd said he said he could put me on anorher round of antibiotics( 4th round) just in case it is an infection or gum boil, or it may just be a mucosa cyst ( i thought cyst didnt drain?)I reminded them I had just finished a 9 day ABX ( my 3rd round) not even 48 hrs ago, then I told her I wanted to ask him questions bc I never had a " Abcess/ Gum Boil/Mucosa Cyst, but he literally was in that room with me MAYBE 1.5 MINUTES, she asked me what would I need to know, I then changed the subject amd asked what should I do going foward, Their Amswer since I'm" denying" My 4th round of Antibiotics within a month and a half was to see if it keeps coming back, maybe wait a month or so, touch base if any significant change and go from there. I asked if maybe I should go to an oral surgeon for them to glance at it. I was told no , I couldn't get a referral let's just wait and see, I explained to them if IF it's an infection I would take my 4th round of Antibiotics but he said it wasn't an infection this morning , amd I asked twice as he was walking out if he was sure it wasn't t an infection, he stated NO It isn't, then while walking down the hall I asked him one more time if he was sure it wasn't an infection he said NO, if it was am abcess it would show up on xray. He then stated real loud NOTHING NOTHING Is there and IF something Appears call us, I felt so small. But I did call, and I still have NO ANSWERS after paying $110.00 today for NOTHING!!!! I also have Crohns so being on alot of Antibiotics cam really mess me up, amd ir it's truly not an infection you don't need an Antibiotic, or so I thought. So I said and explained all that, to ask, is it possible to have a "Gum boil" without any infection? The hard Bump is not right under tooth #30, it's more over we're #29 ( but #29 is gone just empty space) so it's way down on gums Like where your inside cheeks go down and meet ur gums, I hope I'm explaining that right, anyway again it's not right up under tooth #30 I would say if #29 was there it would be under that tooth all the way down past gums where gums meets ur cheeks. ( when I'm home I may be able to get a picture to explain better) but again #30 has been sore and hurting off and on since extraction again I thought it was from me bitting down on that guaze all those hrs, I had alot of pressure on them, but before that I had explained to them that it was sensitive to sweets, amd some colds was told it was normal, so again here are my questions!!
What could it be if it isn't infection?
Should I get a 2nd opinion?
If it's an abcess , are abcess hard to leak out, does it take alot to pop am abcess? ( again there was no white pimple looking bump or any blood or pus that leaked out it was just clear n salty, amd the color of bump was the color of my gums)?
How fast do abcess fill back up if it's an infection amd would it hurt and could u see where it leaked or popped fluid from? Would it look like a sore after it pops? ( mine hasn't filled all the way up as it was this morning but i can tell it's coming back, it's slow.
Should I take another 4th round of Antibiotics without knowing it's a true infection?
I have spent $2,800 in the past Month and half, and I'm so scared I'm gonna have to lose another tooth bc I can't afford another Retreat, and I'm scared my dentist doesn't really care or maybe just doesn't know, but being told to wait it out, if it's am abcess wouldn't that be dangerous? I hope I explained amd to anyone that cares to explain anything to me abt what you think my Dentist is thinking please explain to me bc I don't even know. All I l ow to do, is wait and see what happens. And was told to try to wait atleast a month. THANKS and GOD BLESS!!!!

So it all started after a round of antibiotics in September 2023. Every time I’d eat raw vegetables I would feel extremely depressed for like 1 hour, which would then fade as if nothing had ever happened. To this day I still don’t know what could have caused it, maybe SIBO, maybe another stomach bacteria. My gastrologist was of no use as the symptoms after eating didn’t ring a bell to her and they only did an endoscopy and found some ulcers. After months of trying almost every trick in the book I’ve finally been getting back to work. In general my bowel is more calm now, however I still have a lingering anxiety that comes and goes, especially after having a few drinks with friends (it usually starts on day 2/3 after even having as little as 4 beers and could last up to several weeks)
Anyone has a clue if this is related to the gut issues I’ve had before and what it could be?

My symptoms: Dysuria (pain and burning urethra and bladder), blood clots, bladder wall thickening, cloudy urine, frequency, urgency, negative cultures even though my urine had high proteins, wbc & rbc.
It would be relieved with iv antibiotics that I got in Asia, since waiting in America is so long. My last remission lasted 8 months before the symptoms came back. I went to the ER last month from the pain but all they gave me were some narcotics.
I had a rigid cystoscopy and they didn’t find hunners lesions like my new urologist predicted. They found growths in my bladder that ended up being kidney cells implanting in there, similar to what endo does. The urologist said it was a rare condition with very limited literature, called nephrogenic adenoma. So, it’s not IC.
Now I’m on keflex for the next month and they’re gonna schedule another cystoscopy to see if there’s improvements.
Why it took so long, I have no clue. I’m glad I switched insurance plans because at least now I have a real diagnosis.

Finished 10-day Vanco last weekend from 1st cdiff infection following antibiotic treatment for an antibiotic resistant blood infection. Went to Doc for follow-up this past Thursday, and though I felt tons better, I told him my stools were still on and off. He put me on a Vanco taper of 1 Vanco pill a day for 5-days, then every other day for five doses. I started that this Friday. On Saturday, I was singing at a concert, had a couple of beers, and when I went to the bathroom, noticed that I felt like I needed to poop, but only mucus came out and into the toilet. It scared me. It’s now been happening for the past 24-hours. I’ll start to pee, feel like I need to poop, feel nothing pass, wipe, and discover only mucus on the toilet paper. I have had stool pass three times, during these episodes, and it’s been formed. I’m just frightened as heck that I’m getting a relapse or something. I had Pernil (Rice, Beans, and pulled pork) for dinner the night before the concert, then Kefir on Saturday morning along with eggs, bacon, toast, strawberries, and cheese. I’ve been taking Florastor and a cup of Kefir every day since starting Vanco from diagnosis of cdiff. Later that evening, I had chicken and rice. I can’t tell if I just have a hangover (just a sickly tired feeling with some body/joint aches) from having three beers last night (which has ever been a lot for me in the past) or if cdiff’s rearing its ugly head again. Aaaaargh!!!