I (26F) have been with my boyfriend (25M) for a little over a year. I genuinely really like him and I’d say we’re quite committed. He’s an only child & lost his dad at a young age. His mom has been widowed/single since. He still lives at home (for financial reasons). Something about their relationship has been feeling off to me for a while now. I’ve danced around the topic with my bf, but never addressed it fully and I’m not sure if I should. Should I trust my gut & run, address it with him fully or am I overreacting?
Some examples of things that don’t sit right with me:

• The two speak almost exclusively to each other in their native language when I’m with them (a language I don’t understand).
  • BF’s defense is it’s just natural to speak in a more comfortable tongue together and they don’t do it to exclude me on purpose. I argued that I speak my native language with my family but we do not speak it with each other lengthily if there are non speakers present.
• She has made derogatory comments about my appearance to my boyfriend behind my back and did not retract the statement apparently. They had a fight and eventually giving her the cold shoulder for a week, she apologized though he said he didn’t feel it was very genuine.
• She once yelled up the stairs that I was being too loud in their native language because my bf and I were playing around and I was laughing since he was tickling me or some shit. I felt weird because she could’ve asked us to tone it a bit down in English and I would’ve understood too. But it felt more like “tell your girlfriend to shut up” and made me feel terrible.
  • Another weird thing I’ve noticed is that he never shuts the door fully even if I ask him if he wants to?
• One time my bf & I went to get ice cream together, the next day I’m at his house and his mom randomly calls up the stairs when we’re in his room that she’s craving ice cream. He then asks me if we should take her.
• Once we all went to an animal shelter and I started feeling really emotional because the dogs looked sad and I have a really soft spot for dogs and in general have been feeling down about my senior dog aging so I started crying. I was feeling very overwhelmed in the moment so couldn’t really communicate that to him very well so he just walked off. It felt like he avoided me after and just stuck by his mom. I saw he came back to check on me later but apparently his mom called him back so he left before doing that. TLDR I pretty much just cried in a corner a bit while the two went to look at cats?
  • His mom did comfort me a little when I returned, which I really appreciated that day because her son definitely made no effort to.
  • I did discuss this one at more length with him. He said he was trying to give me space and just didn’t know what to do. He said he went to ask his mom for advice (I don’t know what she replied to him but based on the fact he left me alone after it was probably to just leave me alone for a bit.) He did apologize for how he handled it afterwards.
• Kind of RE above, if we go out all together I’ve noticed he’ll always follow his mom if I go off in a different direction.
• Annually the two of them go eat at the restaurant where her late husband took her on their first date.
• Once I pointed out on the street how another older woman looked amazing for her age, and he said “my mom looks better.” When I went “huh” he corrected to “well don’t you agree she looks really healthy for her age.”

On the other hand:

• She’s never been callous or cold to me directly. Or said anything rude or rudely directly to me. She’s a very giving person, and even cooked a meal for me to take to work once. Other than the weird vibes I do genuinely like her.
  • She’s also never been controlling towards him to my knowledge. Like as far as I know she’s never stopped him from spending time with me/others or expressed distaste that we’re spending too much time or anything like that.
• Other than me being apparently “ugly” (which I really am not), I know on paper any parent would think I’m a great girl (even really critical ones!!)– I’m good at cooking, I bring them treats when I bake, maybe I’m not a model but I do take good care of myself and put effort into my appearance, I have a good career and a solid income, I know I’m smart & I graduated from an Ivy League, and my family is pretty solidly middle class so we don’t have any big financial issues? I mean heck the first time I officially came over for dinner I brought a big box of fruit pastries like a respectable house guest. :C
• My bf knows I have anxieties about his mom (not specifically that I feel really weirded out by them sometimes). I believe he was genuinely angry when his own mom made a few mean comments about my appearance, and he actually didn’t want to tell me about their argument at all and just deal with it himself because he knew it’d make me sad. The only reason I know at all is because I actually guessed correctly that they were fighting about me. Historically he has always very genuinely heard me out whenever I go to him with problems.

Thoughts? Vibe check?

So basically, long story short, I (19M) met this girl (18F) over the internet over a game and we had grown to be very very close friends for a great while playing games with each other, long phone calls, telling each other about our days and whatever for about a whole year. I then learned that we had extremely similar interests and live about 3 hours from each other. At this point, I had grown to like her more than just a friend and wanted to see if she was interested in me the same way that I was interested in her. One day, I had asked her outright if she wanted to be together as a LDR until I could eventually go meet her. She told me that she wasn't ready for a relationship yet and was also not very interested in doing a LDR at the time. Even though I was a bit upset and sad that I was turned down, I accepted it and understood that she only would want to stay close friends with me. After that, im not gonna lie, stuff just got really weird and awkward between me and her. We started hanging out less, the time between my replies and her replies just kept getting longer and longer until it came to the point where it was like 2 to 4 messages per day on average for a bit. I'm just scared I'm already losing her, and she's really the only person I've had a genuine and real connection with for a very long time.
Another thing that I find odd is, she's told me specifically that she doesn't feel at all the same way that I do, so I tell her about my girl problems and I try to forget about liking her and focus on finding my partner somewhere else. I tell her about these things. I might tell her out of nowhere that "I find this one girl attractive" or "I might be going to hang out or go on a date with so and so" and it seems to irritate her somehow. I was just accustomed to telling her every little thing about me and what's going on in my life but she seems so closed off and hurt by something. She never opens up about anything and it seems concerning to me. I want to know so much more about her and I want to understand her better, but its almost like she doesn't want me to at all.
We went from hanging out like every other day or maybe every two days to hanging out maybe once every two weeks to even maybe once a month. I'm trying so hard to keep what we have going but at times it seems like she doesn't even want that. Other times it seems like she loves having me around and other times it's like I don't even exist for her. I just need to know if I'm over thinking this or taking the wrong approach. Am I being insensitive? Am I being way too pushy? Am I being too expecting of her? I'm just so confused.
I feel like more of a tedious pest then a friend to her and I don't know how to fix it. Should I just have never explained how I felt? Should I have kept my mouth shut? Ever since she knew how I felt about her, shes been extremely distant and has spent less and less time with me. It honestly makes me sad but I also want to know what's going on. I've asked her before and she really didn't give me a clear answer.
Im always the one to ask if she wants to talk or hang out. She never does which leads me to believe that she has completely lost interest and does not even want to anymore, but she has absolutely no issue getting on games with her other friends and leaving me to be ignored for the rest of the day. I want to explain to her how I feel but I don't know how much more clear I can get. Even as a best friend, I still very much want her around. I just don't think she wants me around at all.
I try to ask her if she wants to talk or spend time with each other, I then either get ignored for the rest of the day or she tells me "sure" and then I ask "okay, when?" and she never gets back to me. I just feel like I fucked up when I confessed to her. Could that really be the reason why this is happening?

Hi! It's been a while, but I'm looking for a new RP. I'm specifically looking for a longterm MxM fantasy-based RP.
As a brief intro, I'm a 29 year old female based in the US. Full transparency, I work a full time job, so my activity level varies, but I always try to communicate a change in schedule to my partners. I absolutely love fantasy worldbuilding and working with my partners to craft a story.
I'm a literate writer that tends to write at least 2+ paragraphs (length varies based on the scene) and always in third person POV. I'm looking for a partner that is 21+ years old. Any gender is fine as long as you're comfortable playing a male character opposite mine!
The plot itself is open to discussion (but I do have a specific character I'd like to play). He's a young cleric that has been in the service of his temple for most of his life. He began losing his vision as a child and as a result, he's never really traveled far outside of his home. Even so, he's begun to earn himself a reputation as an adept healer with a deeper connection to the divine than most clergy twice his age. He's gentle and softspoken, but dutiful and incredibly passionate about his work. Unfortunately, his abilities have started to draw unwanted attention, and he's fully aware that remaining within the safety of his temple might not be an option.
Enemies to lovers could be a fun trope to play with for example, but it's certainly not our only option. Either way, I'm looking for some drama and angst along with the tender moments!
If you're interested in RPing with me, send me a message or chat with a self-introduction and a brief character or plot pitch. It doesn't have to be a complete idea, but I love bouncing ideas off of my partner and want to work together to create something awesome.

okay so this might be long because i want to provide as much detail as possible so you can get the full picture. i (23NB) have lived in this NYC apartment for 4 years, and lived with one of my roommates (24F) (will be referred to as “A”) for the entirety of the time i’ve been in the city, which is 6 years. we were assigned roommates in college and just kept living together because at the time we were good friends and it worked! we had rotating 3rd roommates throughout the years and dealt with a lot of crazy shit together, including a violent roommate, but that’s a story for a different day. so this roommate and i had been having some issues for the past couple of years because she got addicted to ketamine. i felt responsible for her because it started out as us using recreationally together but she spiraled out of control with it and honestly the entire situation was just a lot on me. throughout her addiction she was doing, at one point, 16 grams in 3 days, so i was really worried that she would die, not to mention she doesn’t really test her drugs and was getting it from a neighborhood that’s notorious for fentanyl. it honestly became my full time job to take care of her, but at the end of the day I was just trying to be a good friend. after some therapy/self work, i now realize how enabling the role I was playing actually was, but it was just the position that I was put in and I had also never dealt with something like this before. I feel like for further context, i should add that A’s parents pay her rent and for a lot of things for her. she had a part time job at the time and was also in school but left due to her addiction. the situation that i am in is very different, my family does not support me financially and i pay for everything for myself and have made my way pretty much on my own. i’m pretty established in my neighborhood because I am a tattoo artist at a local shop and also have worked for 3 other businesses within the same few blocks. i also consistently have multiple jobs at once, now i have 3, and for a long time I was working 6 days a week. not really relevant to the situation but needless to say, i already have a LOT on my plate. anyways, so yeah. for about almost 2 years, i was dealing with my roommates addiction. i watched her overdose and throw up on herself 5-7 times, she projectile vomited all over the house, i have dragged her out of a pool of her own vomit, she would consistently lie to me about whether she was high or had bought ketamine, and our other friends and i would go through her room to make sure she wasn’t hiding it countless times, (to no avail obviously, she would always lie and say she didn’t have any more when she did, hidden in hard to find places.) it affected everyone in our friend group and in her life. but especially me because i was really the only person who was physically present for it all. i tried talking to her about it at first, and was very understanding and patient with her and genuinely was doing my best to help because she was my friend, we were really close, and I didn’t want to see her die or ruin her life. she also expected me to say something to her and would tell me that i should say something if i thought she was high. she would say this when she was sober and it started off an an “accountability partner” thing, but eventually became very codependent and unhealthy. even when i would ask her, she would lie. i made it very clear from the beginning that all of this was damaging our relationship, but i was still doing my best to be her friend and be there for her. at one point, i even took the drugs out of her room and hid them in mine to take to another friends house the next day to dispose of them, and she went into my room and found them. it reached a point where I made her call her parents and tell them what had been going on. calling her parents had honestly been in discussion for a while, and the sober version of her agreed that it needed to happen. she got a slap on the wrist and sent to the mental hospital for a few days, she even convinced them to let her out early! her parents also weren’t really involved in her care at all after because she has never been disciplined in her life, her parents think she can do no wrong. she relapsed soon after she got out and at this point, I started taking a lot more space for myself because I was mentally and emotionally drained and it was clear that all my efforts were in vain. this was after dealing with it for about a year. honestly, i should have definitely started planning on moving out around this point. the reasons I didn’t were the fact that i still considered A to be one of my best friends despite what we had gone through, all of my jobs are like a 5-10 minute walk away, and I also loved my room. i put a lot of time and effort into decorating it and I had also lived there for a long time and for a really great price, $850 for a huge room with a dishwasher, laundry in building, AND a rooftop i can smoke on outside my window with a view of a GREEN backyard with PLANTS. not some concrete bs. that’s UNHEARD OF in nyc. im also not really great with change, even if it’s for the best, and to be honest i was also naive and thought things would eventually go back to normal. this was a person that i previously trusted a lot, i didn’t think she would normally do these things to me. anyways, eventually she got sober and then my, at the time, best friend of 7 years from home, a state across the country, moved in. (22 F, let’s call her “B”) we met in high school and I was in the class above her. we only went to school together for a year before I graduated and moved to NYC, so for the past few years, our friendship had been over facetime/seeing eachother occasionally when I would come visit. B’s background is similar to mine, the state we’re from is very impoverished and we both left the religion we were raised as. another huge reason she moved here was so that she could start medically transitioning and get on estrogen. i was really excited for her and also wanted to support her in her transition, im also non binary and we come from a really transphobic state, so growing up queer in the south was like a huge part of our friendship, and when she moved in, she didn’t have a lot of gender affirming clothes, and i had a ton of clothes, so i gave her a bunch of mine, i sent her resources, lent her books/zines, point is i really was trying to support her, and before she moved in and even throughout us living together we would talk for hours about this stuff. also, normally, i would not feel the need to even mention the fact that someone is trans, but all of this is relevant to the story. i will also add that I know now to never live with friends! at the time, i thought it would be okay because I trusted her and we seemed to have good communication on roommate matters and i think we both had good intentions going into it. we would say things like “i don’t plan on moving out on bad terms” “we can communicate and respect eachothers boundaries!” etc. i also knew that she really wanted to move here because she had talked about it for years and she came and visited before she moved in. so yeah, things were great at first, but not for long. so I am someone who, like I said, am at work most of the time and when i come home from work I just want to relax and smoke weed and chill and if you know me in real life, you know that i’m not a very beefy person and it takes a lot to really make me upset, i’m generally chill about most things, honestly to my detriment. so the first signs of things starting to go south were when B started to say that I was ignoring her. this was confusing to me, as we hung out most days after I got off work, and she even had a job herself at the time, (she’s been fired twice in the past year and was unemployed on and off) so she wasn’t like completely trapped in the house all the time. I would try to inquire further and understand why she thought I was ignoring her, and reassure her that I’m listening. she started telling me that she needs a lot of reassurance, and i told her that I am happy to reassure her whenever needed! we talked it through and i genuinely started to put in a lot of effort into making sure i was being fully present during our time together and also making sure I was hanging out with her enough. this quickly evolved into us having very extensive conversations for hours where she would bring up the fact that she still felt like i was ignoring her, and i would reassure that I was not purposefully ignoring her, im listening and really trying. and almost daily she would bring up a problem that she had with something that I said or did. she even at one point started tweeting about me, saying things like “do u even consider others?”. she also asked me to be on constant emotional monitoring for her, which i told her that i will not do that. i don’t really pick up on subtle social cues or “shade” and also it’s not my job to do that. if something upsets you, you can communicate with me about it instead of being passive aggressive or expecting me to be able to read your mind. plus, real friends don’t have to be responsible for every single emotion! at one point, she told me that she was mad at me because living together wasn’t living up the the idealized version of what she thought it would be. she would also guilt trip me like a LOT. she would be like “as a friend, you should be doing ____ for me” and her requests got more and more ridiculous as time went on, one of them being to basically force myself to start listening to a genre of music that i simply just don’t like or want to listen to during my own time, insinuating that i would be a bad friend if i didn’t like the same music as her. and to that, i tried to explain to her that we don’t have to like the same music in order to be friends and that i don’t care if she listens to music that i don’t particularly listen to on my own, although i am happy to listen to her recommendations, i am picky about the music I listen to. basically i felt like she was trying to find any stupid reason to say i was a bad friend. it started to really annoy me, because i already had a lot on my plate, and honestly i just didn’t have the bandwidth to be fully present all the time, especially after dealing with my other roommates addiction for so long. i needed space and time for myself really badly, and I felt like I was trying really hard to please her to no avail. all of this was incredibly exhausting to deal with. i tried to communicate this to B, but it never got through. during these very tedious conversations, B would say things that were extremely concerning, such as “You need to stop triggering me!!!” to which i responded, “okay let’s make a deal, i will be more mindful of your triggers if you work on managing them.” she would also constantly make accusations at me. for example, she accused me of laughing AT HER when i was not, and I was laughing at something completely unrelated. there were many other times that she accused me of doing and saying things that I never said or did. she would twist my words a lot, things i told her in confidence, and use them against me, adding an entire new meaning to what i was saying. and if i disagreed with her or got even a little defensive she would be like “You just pissed me off!!!!” i honestly felt like she was just picking on me and criticizing me at a lot of points, because I could literally breathe wrong and it would be an issue. i now realize that she actually just needs to create drama, but i didnt want to admit that at the time. again, during this time I was trying to be very calm during our conversations when trying to reassure her and explain myself, but internally I was very stressed out by all of this. at some point during all this, A relapsed. this was a disaster, B knew about the relapse and was lying to me about it. i was especially upset because the way A relapsed was she asked me to unlock the parental password on her phone so she could “update apps”, but instead she downloaded the app she uses to text her plug, so essentially she tricked me into enabling her relapse and took advantage of my trust. i messaged her parents immediately and told them. at this point, i felt like it was expected of me to do that. of course, they basically did nothing for a while, it got really bad. A was basically not functioning at all. she would tell me that she didn’t care how she made me feel. our other friend came over and went through her room and babysat her to make sure she wouldn’t do ketamine but she pretended to go to sleep while he was literally crying next to her and she got up and did it right after he left. a lot of horrible things were said, i would express the fact that i hate that i can’t trust her, and she would scream back “i don’t want you to trust me!”, amongst many other awful things. we would hear loud snorting like every few minutes every single day, which was extremely stressful. she broke the stove because she was high, it was affecting the way she looked and her physical health, and at this point it was a safety concern for her and for B and I, because we did not want to be responsible if something happened to her and this was affecting us tremendously. eventually, B and I called her parents and told them a lot of details and begged them to send her to rehab, I had to send them a long text message being like super blunt about the fact that she needs to get professional help or she will die, and they were basically saying that ultimately it’s up to her, which was bullshit in my opinion, but she did end up going. during the time A was in rehab, things with B got progressively worse. a lot of weird and horrible things started happening, she berated me for like over an hour about one of my closest friendships, that she met once and got “bad vibes from”, i told her that I didn’t want to be put in a position where i have to defend my other friendships to her, especially ones that have nothing to do with her, and that this person is an extremely good friend to me, and that she didn’t have to be around her if she didn’t want to. i was asking her to stop but she wouldn’t! she was pulling bullshit reasons why i shouldn’t hang out with this person anymore out of her ass. for context, B drinks a lot, and she drank the night we all hung out while my other friend and i didn’t really drink. she was like “i actually HAD to drink that night because your friend was making me so uncomfortable!” which, that night was extremely normal and chill, nothing bad happened at all, also don’t blame me or anyone else for your own habits! she would pick fights almost daily. on halloween, we got drunk together with one of the people she was seeing at the time, and she ended up berating me in front of this person for ignoring her, not respecting her, etc and the person had to step in and tell her that she’s making pointed comments at me and not hearing me out, and that she was being horrible to me. (this is not the only time someone hung out with us together and then told her that she was being an asshole to me.) that night, she said a lot of hurtful things, such as “at least i don’t have a bunch of fake friendships!” (as if my friendship with her was the only “real friendship” i could have) and “you don’t have the lesbian experience you claim to have!!!!” (what does that even mean??? i’ve been lesbian since before we met lol) and she also falsely accused me of saying that being a lesbian is worse than being a trans woman, which i never said! i have never even thought that and that is not how i feel at all! at first i tried to explain everything using logic, but eventually i basically told her to stop projecting her insecurities onto me and to stop dragging me into her shit. she slammed the door in my face when we got home. we didn’t talk for like a month. during this month, i really needed some outside support, so i reached out to some trusted people to tell them what was going on and get some advice on what i should do/ how to handle the situation, and to get an outside perspective. honestly, that night was the straw that broke the camels back and sent me into a full mental breakdown from the stress of everything that had been going on in the house. i was like scream crying every single day for the entire month, unable to function at work, not thinking clearly at all. everyone in my life was telling me i should just move out asap. i think i was just extremely upset because I then realized that my relationships with both of them were not healthy, but i really cared about these people. i was extremely disappointed in how things were going, and i was also extremely worried about both of their wellbeings, i didn’t want anything to happen to them or to not have them in my life. and i was also upset that they had been being absolutely horrible to me and i was honestly just sick of being treated like shit by my roommates at this point. honestly i was an asshole when i would talk about it sometimes, but how was i supposed to be kind when everyone was being so cruel to me for no reason? i was honestly really mad, especially because B knew the stress of taking care of A, like why are you adding to the intense stress i already had just experienced?? during this time, i realized that all of this was happening because of B’s untreated BPD. to clarify, i do not care about people having bpd or other mental health disorders as long as you are not hurting other people, which, B was hurting me a lot and honestly our relationship was pretty destructive to my mental health. i also realized that these friendships were wildly codependent and unhealthy, and I needed to set boundaries. i can only take so much abuse!!! and i felt like a scapegoat for both of them and a crutch in the situation. although i still cared for these people, i knew that this was not sustainable long term. i could not handle the weight of A’s life on my back or the way I was being treated by either of them, or the fact that my home was not actually safe. at first, i was going to move out and take a break from the friendships, with the intention of hopefully rekindling when we were all in healthier places, but also the need to move out felt super urgent. the stress from this entire situation had leaked into every area of my life. i was doing poorly at work, every person in my life was telling me how i needed to get out asap because this shit was bad for my health and they had watched my mental health deteriorate because of it but i really didn’t want to move, i had lived there and known these people for so long. after chatting with other people who have bpd who are in therapy and live an emotionally healthy life, they told me that what really helps people with bpd is if you are honest with them and encourage them to seek treatment, as well as setting clear boundaries around their behavior. i was the closest person to her at the time, so i wanted to be honest with her and try to help, i wrote both of my roommates long text messages explaining how i felt and what my boundaries were moving forward. they did not take this well! they started justifying their behavior to eachother, and made me out to be the villain in the story. A told B that i told other people she had bpd, which i did do! but i did that because i needed support and advice, and I also couldn’t handle the horrible treatment i was receiving, the weight of all of this was extremely heavy. not because i was trying to “turn people against her”, as they were trying to make it seem like. this is a real life adult issue, not some petty sides picking bullshit, and i genuinely needed support because everything that was happening was making me feel insane and extremely stressed out. I even previously asked A not to say anything to B to make the situation worse and that at this point I just wanted to have conversations surrounding solution, but i think A was being strategic in telling B things that she knew would make her upset. B was upset that I told people what was going on and accused me of being manipulative. i honestly understand why she would be upset about that, it’s a very stigmatized disorder and it wasn’t really my place to share that information. but i also told these people those things in confidence, i didn’t expect them to tell her i said anything to try to make the situation worse. and i also only told people that i trusted and honestly i just wanted help and support and an outside perspective and to express my feelings. after i sent the long text messages to my roommates, (i let B read hers in person so we could have open dialogue and A hers while she was in rehab so she could talk about it in therapy) (also i know that long text messages are not the best way to communicate and work through issues, im going to avoid doing that in the future) B’s response was basically something like, yeah i have bpd and yes I was projecting my shit onto you and lashing out at you, but I used to do way worse things to people. but thank you for typing this out and i’m gonna start going to therapy and working on it. she also said something like “well. friendships are through the good, the bad, and the ugly. sorry that you saw my ugly side!” like. okay. a real apology would be nice lol. in the days after this, i ended up having a huge mental crisis from all of the overwhelming stress and could not function properly, i had to go to the hospital. once i got back from the hospital, all I wanted to do was work on myself. i started creating distance from them and going back to therapy and al anon, and really started trying to pull my own shit together. i apologized for telling other people and said that I wouldn’t tell anyone again, and i didn’t. A’s sibling and i suggested that we go to family therapy so that we could have healthier relationships, A’s parents even offered to pay for it, but it never actually happened. things were kind of okay for the next few months. i wasn’t as close to either of them, but i was okay with that because I needed space and to be able to focus on myself. i talked about it a lot with a therapist, and i was essentially trying to maintain the friendships in a non codependent way. i honestly just kept to myself for a while and started taking a lot more alone time. forgot to mention, another reason they were mad at me was because I was going to move out on short notice (before i went to the hospital), but I also was going to find someone to fill the room to make the process less stressful for them, and i was vetting people to make sure they would be a good fit, and i wanted A and B to meet and approve of the person. i needed to get out of there as fast as possible, but i wanted to put effort into finding someone compatible with them. i already had a place to go lined up, but it fell through before we found anyone else (the stress of trying to move also contributed to me going to the hospital and the situation i was going to go into seemed great at first but turned out to be a complete mess), and i also felt really guilty and horrible, so i ended up staying and trying to repair and maintain the relationships while also taking adequate alone time and upholding my boundaries. anyways, a few months pass, all i have been doing at this point is working on myself and going to work and coming home and chilling, there hasn’t really been much conflict besides the normal A being a passive aggressive asshole (which she always has been. looking back, i don’t even know how i was friends with someone like this) and B would still say disturbing things every once in a while, such as comparing me to past friendships that didn’t work out, and at one point she even flipped the narrative subtly to make it seem like i “had an outburst for no reason”. (when she is actually the person who had the outbursts towards me), and generally just blame shifting a lot in subtle ways, saying I was the one who “changed the dynamics of the house”, even though all I did was set boundaries and take time for myself, plus, the previous dynamic obviously was not working. but honestly i was just kind of ignoring it. at this point the dynamic has been A and B spending most of their time together, (they also have a codependent friendship) and me mostly keeping to myself, but hanging out occasionally and being cordial in the apartment. I was okay with that because I really just wanted alone time anyways, and I made it clear to them that I need time to work on myself, which i was doing a lot of, and B started therapy so I thought we were all just kind of working on ourselves at this point and trying to move forward. so one day, A and B go back to A’s home state together for a week, i was honestly a bit upset by this because we originally planned to all go together, we have all always gone together in the past, and honestly i thought things were chill now that everyone was in therapy, plus we had hung out on purpose occasionally. nope! once they got back, they told me I had to move out! i was extremely upset by this. honestly i was at my wits end with their bullshit, especially since A had continued to be an asshole to me even when i was still being kind and normal to her. honestly i am glad I had to move out, my life is going to get a lot better now that I don’t have them in it, but I was still just like. pissed because honestly my only objective this entire time has been to exist in my house and also I just felt like it was unfair especially considering the fact that they were the ones who were causing the issues, although I do recognize my part in them. i was codependent AF and trying to fix my friends, enabling horrible things to happen in my life to the point of going actually insane, i had extremely poor boundaries in the name of trying to be a good friend, and i should have left a long long time ago. but anyways, when they told me I had to move out, i basically said that I agreed and that I didn’t want to live with them anymore, i slammed my door and blocked them both on instagram, i also removed all of my personal belongings from the common areas. thankfully, my real friends were all there for me during this time and letting me crash on their couches. i didn’t really want to be in the apartment. within the next few days, i started getting harassed over text by their friends and unfollowed by people who were associated with them. they started going on a smear campaign against me! their friends started harassing me over text, saying “you need the mental hospital. stop pissing in glasses and stop speaking on trans people. seek the maximum amount of help possible” so basically, at this point, they’re basically telling people things that are blatantly untrue. i have never pissed in a glass before, in fact, i know B has pissed in cups in her room for her whole life (probably where she got the idea from) besides, pissing in cups isn’t a crime! also, at this point, i thought we had already talked out and worked through the me telling people about B’s BPD. so i messaged them and I was like. “can you guys please stop slandering me. this has been a traumatizing situation for all of us. honestly i would prefer for this to be as smooth as possible. i have not pissed in a glass and i have no idea what i even said about trans people that was offensive or hurtful” and they responded by saying “we have proof you were misgendering me and the shit we found out was before A’s relapse and before we had a fight”. so basically, while they were on vacation, they went LOOKING for things to use against me. A’s relapse was 8 months ago at this point, why are you digging stuff up from back then to use against me now?? i also have no idea when i misgendered her, and it was obviously a complete accident. i went through every message i sent in the past year that had anything to do with her and couldn’t find any misgendering. at this point, i did not inquire further because I was sick of having to defend myself to someone who is committed to misunderstanding me and also manipulating the situation to make me seem like a bad person. honestly, i don’t care much about the smear campaign, because most of those people i didn’t really like anyway, and the ones i did who believed them, i know now that they’re not my real friends. (even though it’s the same people saying that the way I was treated by A through her addiction was incredibly unfair to me, and asking why she is doing this to me, but how dare I be actually affected?!) although the saying i’m transphobic thing is really frustrating, especially considering the fact that i literally invited you to come here SO THAT YOU COULD TRANSITION and the fact that I am also non binary. but also, how are you going to come into my home after I invited you to move in with me out of the kindness of my heart, start yelling at me and attacking me constantly and disrespecting my boundaries, kick me out of MY OWN HOUSE, and then smear my name, saying things that are blatantly untrue, to people i knew for years BEFORE YOU MOVED IN, who I INTRODUCED YOU TO ???? anyways, B went into my room while i was at work and took all of her artwork off my walls, which i don’t care about the artwork, but her going into my room made me really uncomfortable, so I installed a lock on my door until I could move out. B also ripped my mentor at the tattoo shop’s artwork off of the walls, stole it, and when i demanded it be returned it was returned to me vandalized. (she knows that my mentor wants the best for me and supports me in many areas of my life). so at this point, i’m being harassed and my items are being stolen. i had to get out of there asap, at this point it was a safety concern, it has honestly been a safety concern this entire time. so I ended up finding a place that’s the same amazing price and great quality in the area that’s still close to my jobs with people who are actually healthy and normal!!! and i moved out a month before I was supposed to because my mom and the rest of my support system agreed that it was not safe for me to stay another month, i didn’t tell them that I was moving early because I knew they would damage my things. It took me 2 days to move, and the night in between me moving, they stole my bike and put it out on the street. and A admitted that she did it out of spite because I moved early. so I stole some things back to get even and I also did not repaint or repair the room like I was supposed to, (i was going to originally before my bike was stolen) but I left her my deposit to cover the repainting etc. i also unfortunately dumped old protein shake on the floor out of pettiness and hatefulness. i am not normally like that but I was FUMING. that was definitely that angriest i have ever been in my life. i ended up paying the rent for the month I wasn’t there. But A still decided to message me on facebook, where I forgot to block her and send me an invoice with a bunch of “damages” to the apartment, demanding that I send her $1700 to get the entire floor replaced, new doors, etc. her numbers were ridiculous, it was a bunch of bullshit and I told her that i wasn’t paying it, to never contact me again, and blocked her. her parents pay her rent, it’s not about the money for her it’s about being a vindictive and entitled bully. plus, i really don’t owe her shit at this point. anyways, i have learned a lot of lessons from all this and am working on acknowledging my part in all of these issues and am going to start going to codependents anonymous to start rebuilding my life. obviously i have a lot to learn and work on within myself, and i was not perfect throughout this, even though my only intentions were to be there for my friends and exist in my own house. honestly i never want to see either of these people again! i hate them both so deeply for making my safe space unsafe, and for everything else they’ve done to me, including making my PTSD incredibly worse. and from now on I am going to leave friendships WHEN ITS TIME instead of dragging it out, and hopefully now I can choose better friends and have stronger boundaries, and in the future when tough situations arise i will be more equipped to respond in better ways. hopefully i never have to go through anything like this again!!

Hello! Thank you for viewing my post ^^
Currently, I am looking for a small group of four to run my campaign!
-Intro-
Please call me Dio! I'm an 18-year-old from the Midwest who enjoys D&D and would love to DM for more people. I started playing in 7th grade and quickly became a DM rather than a player. My first campaign was trash, but I have grown from it. D&D slowly became a hobby that I haven't been able to stop doing, though I've had some rough moments with it. I was a forever DM for a group of my IRL friends! I would DM for them quite often, but life got in my way, so I've taken a break from DMing for them and playing D&D in general.
Currently I have a Thursday group that I really like playing with! I am looking for a new group because I just quit my job to focus on my passions so I want to have another session during the week!
-How I am as a DM-
I am generally a chill person when it comes to DMing. I give players a lot of freedom when it comes to the game! However, I do have my limits. I've had so many situations where things like that have happened, i.e., a time a past party of mine 'Tokyo drifted' a giant alligator. I'm not a very combat-heavy DM; expect more roleplay than combat. I also really like homebrew and involving it in my campaigns. It's usually a fun touch to add. I also particularly like describing scenes, usually the places you visit or battle scenes. Since I had to take a break from D&D, I'm still reading up on things to get myself back into the groove. If I mess up anything or seem to get something wrong, I do not mind if you take the time to inform me of the correct way of doing something.
-Lore-
From each corner of the land, folks who have no idea of one another existence are called upon by carrier pigeons to come to visit a dead man at his funeral. This dead man is someone you once knew in the past, but you physically cannot remember more than the fact he was important to you. Most of your memories of the man and times with him are gone, but you still choose to pay your respects to him and his family. Upon arrival to an unknown empire, it is revealed that you weren't the only person called to this funeral. Others unknown to you were also invited. They were possibly in the same boat as you. It's a funeral; you pay your respects and are about to leave when a woman calls upon you."Are you the people my father sent letters to?"
-Rules-

• We start at level one and will stop around level 25 (I have a homebrew rule I like to use for that!)
• We're doing milestone advancement!
• Please be at least 18; as long as you aren't 30+, I'm fine with DMing for you!
• No power-gaming, rules lawyering, or meta-gaming.
• No sexism, homophobia, racism, transphobia, or other real-world discrimination.
• Please be able to use Discord and have a mic!
• Be okay with having 2- to 3-hour-long sessions. Hopefully, we can figure out the best time for everyone regarding the sessions' length.
• Have some experience with roleplaying
• Be open to new ideas! I use a certain mechanic in my campaigns, so if you want to join (in which all documents for it will be sent over), at least acknowledge that's what I use.
• Apply over private messages! I feel more comfortable talking to people and getting them on board over dms rather than comments.

If you have any questions about the story, rules, etc., feel free to ask! I would be more than happy to explain anything! Thank you for viewing my post, and I hope all who read have a great night ^^

Hey, don't know if this is going to be longer or shorter but I need to talk about this, Chroma traveler is the highest Chroma gun highest value was 78k which didn't sit right with me back then it was 2k ik why Maybe because nobody like it and didn't care to dupe it like other knives honestly really don't get why 2 guns and one knife has so much high value just because of duping mainly?? like fix the game honestly I said this multiple times but this is getting out of hand to the point where in value Harv and Icep losing value, underpays doesn''t mean it dying but the people say otherwise nobody reads that the supreme list people need to talk about items and put them in a range in a fair level instead of something so overpriced as I get it but why make the chroma less then the actual item it so dumb to me because why the chroma is supposed to be the better version but I get why the lag and whatever but duping I'm guessing and the lag changed that but here where I hate this duping thing if there not going fix it then somebody gonna have to do something I have 3 evergreens it had 200+ overpays but because it now "stable" it not getting value because of that bc people are like "Oh it stable so it doesn't matter" it the same thing with the fluctuating thing it just that's a little worse because most cases it goes lower then the initial value stable actually has a chance to increase and flippable where do I even start. Flippable is when a likely chance of an item increasing in value here thing... evergun has a 40% which means it doing well and yep it is but with the Evergreen I may ask it is 5% flippable and 600 stable which doesn't sit right with me lets just say somebody has an ever gun and they wanna offer and evergreen, they want it right so they overpay people like evergreen it kinda the only thick knife not in a weird way :O but seriously Dark Sword is so thin idk why is it so thin but Darkshot is 3d evergreen has a nice throw animation good hitbox that depends on the avatar and is overall a good knife also the replies ty for agreeing to my last post about the issues and a youtube I forget their name they talk about dupers and it's important to note that mm2 is about having fun and not trading but they wanna incorporate that to make it fun obviously? yea, but it not working right now it doing a horrendous job the economy is bad since things had so much value and it's so low and it's so messed up to people who had lots of value and it went down... it unfair an evergreen would be 800 because of it overpay but now it 600?? that's what people's mindsets are I wish Supreme could fix this and instead of saying stable they should say something like stable-overpaid where they can't decide because it could be either way and would make people's lives simpler and it might fix some issues about the trading system. People wanna scam in value and that's not okay 500+ or more isn't okay some people don't know the value and therefore scam and it wrong for people to do a trade and get scammed by scammers like Adopt Me instead of reporting the exact person there gonna be a vote an idea I created where 3-4 people will vote on somebody who scams but it has to be valid ofc and this, in turn, would ban the players not only this would help dupers I think idk how it works I think u just use the trading glitch but they should see ur trades tbh they should ban u if your making suspsicous trade but I mean there could be trades with alt and that could be a problem but I have a solution there might be a message saying like oh is this ur account can you variety well just because of dupers and hackers etc and if they do this plan I would call trading pheyasco they can see more of the player's movement and understand their player base more HERE WHERE IT COMES IN the people who work there could ask the workers who work on supreme idk if they work on the game they should honestly they could make the value more stable and more fair and need to increase some items like if this workers u can banned dupers i hope but maybe people are going say "TOO MUCH WORK??" yea it is but supreme workers or somebody could do that and in exchange instead of nikilis paying he could pay goldies or radios something it would be a fair trade right? My own thoughts the only reason I wanna post on reddit is just to help the community and for them to understand what is going on in mm2. Children, People the game is dying and it died it almost died because of hackers before but what if it this time it will actually be the end of mm2 and it will just die?? i don't want that I wanna help this community fix the problems. I think this should be accountable and if there problems I'll make a follow-up post :D. Also this post is much longer then the other one since it like reading your reading more and more each time understanding the factor of the problem more and more hope this helps might make a part 3 or maybe small parts idk :0.

So I'm a guy who depends on the internet to make a living in today's world. I'm a twitch streamer and I stream myself playing video games such as fort nite, grand theft auto, and so on. I started this along with a film making hobby after I left college back in December of 2023. College didn't work due to personal reasons and so ever since then I have struggled making a living cause no place would hire me. I started streaming in March but my viewership didn't boost up until recently so now I am a late night streamer. I stream from 1am to about 6am. This is my job now. My family is trying to sell our home and I am getting so annoyed by people requesting showing times that are 11am or 12pm. I sleep from 6 or 7am to about 3pm. I specifically told the realtor no showings until after 1pm and he isn't willing to accomodate that. He said that by doing that we would be restricting the potential for a buyer. I don't get what is so wrong about waiting for me to wake up at at least 1pm. I have a night job and so I need my sleep otherwise I will get grumpy and angry. This happened earlier today and I'm frustrated, tired and angry and couldn't fall back asleep afterwards. I'm so angry and I'm about to lose it. I want to go pull pranks cause I am so frustrated and angry. I'm already dealing with other shick already. I have a friend who is upset at me cause I won't let him meet my lady friend. He told me " Are you afraid that I'm gonna tell the truth about you to her about how much of a creep that you are ? Cause if you push me, I will do it. I don't even have to see her in person, I can just message her on FB and your done.". I'm so angry at him for wanting to black mail me. He is an immature jerk who has tourettes and he is always saying inappropriate stuff around women, of course I don't want him to see her. I'm already with that already and now we have the realtor crap toppled on top now. I'm about to lose it. I don't get what is so wrong about me just asking for some time to sleep. I am also refusing to clean up my room cause it would just make me misplace stuff that I need. Does it make me a jerk for refusing to get up early for a house showing ?? Is it bad for me to refuse to clean up my room ??

I have a situation in which I planned on living in my current rental for a second year, but my landlord signed a lease with a new tenant. Renters' rights have improved a lot in the past few years, and I am looking into them.
I believe that it is the LL's responsibility to notify their tenant that the lease will not be renewed 90 days prior to the end of the lease. Just as it is the tenant's responsibility to inform the landlord that they will be moving out 90 days prior to the end of the lease.
If a landlord wants a tenant to move out, there are deadlines in which notifications need to be made. If a tenant does not wish to move out of the property, the landlord cannot force them to leave if they have not broken any lease agreements.
TIMELINE:
8/1/24: First day of lease
12/10/24: text to LL " Hey [LL name], there is no imminent need, but I'd like to talk about the process of maybe moving out early. All the fees are 100% not a problem and there is no rush"
12/10/24: text to LL "If it's too much of a problem and if it would put you in a bad spot then don't worry about it and I'll continue through the lease"
12/10/24: text from LL "[my name], let's talk about it after the first of the year I just came down with Covid"
12/11/24: text to LL: "Okay. Feel better"
I was considering moving in with my ex and sent a message to ask what would be involved in ending my lease early. They responded that they were sick with covid and that we should talk about it at a later date. We never talked about it again.
4/8/24: Text from LL "I'm back [from out of town] and you can drop off rent at my house today if that works. Also I assume you'll be not wanting to renew your lease so I'd like to start showing it as soon as possible."
4/15/24: Text to LL "I would like to keep my lease next year"
4/15/24: Text from LL " Are you sure? You asked me earlier in the year to allow you out of the lease. I have someone who would like to lease it July 1 for $1,200 a month"
4/21/24: Text to LL "Yep. I'm still serious about signing a lease for next year"
6/10/24: an envelope with a "move out checklist" is at my front door. It's worth noting that I had not been home in 10 days.
6/10/24: text to LL "[LL name], I plan on living here next year. We talked about that, remember?"
6/10/24: text from LL "Hi [my name], yes, I do recall that conversation However, in an earlier conversation you requesting to get out of your lease early and as you are not available to discuss it I had an opportunity to go ahead and rent it so I did. I'm sorry for any misunderstanding, but I already have a signed lease with the new tenant."
6/10/24: text to LL "The later conversations take precedence though. You asked me again and I told you that wasn't the case anymore"
The above is the extent of our conversation regarding lease renewal/move out. There were other messages during this time, but they are about dropping off rent and letting maintenance people into the house.
He asked twice if I wanted to move out and twice, I told him that I would like to continue living there. Then without replying to my response of “Yes, I want to renew my lease” he found a new renter. Knowing all this he neglected to tell me anything.
I don't want to fight with him. If I'm right and he missed something, I'd like to let him know. If there is nothing I can do, then I'll move out. Does anyone out there have experience with rental laws or any advice?

My (27M) wife (21F) went out with friends the other night. I'm gonna lay out a few key details:

• I have an anxious attachment style and she has an avoidant attachment style.
  
• She went to the bar, and then a bonfire afterwards where she has no cell service (she did have service at the bar and also while she was on the way to the fire).
  
• I'm about 3 weeks into a 9 month deployment to Iraq, so I'm 9 hours ahead of her (she's in the MST time zone). I'm gonna do my best to make sure the times are accurate.
  
• All times shown are in MST (her time).
  
• From start to finish, this story takes place from about 6 pm Saturday evening to about 11 am Monday morning (her time)
  
• This isn't the first time we've had this conversation.
  
• She ended up getting into a fight with a girl at the fire. I knew this was gonna possibly happen beforehand because the beef between them had been going on for a little while prior to this happening. I won't get into that because that's a completely different story.
  

Back to the story:
It's Saturday evening for her and early Sunday morning for me at this point. Before she went out I told her something along the lines of "okay baby have fun, be safe, and please keep me updated". She left the house around 6 pm or so, and the only update I got throughout the night was around 9:30 pm when she sent me a bathroom selfie (I texted her and asked for it). I told her she was beautiful and I asked her how things were going. She didn't reply. At first I didn't mind because I knew she was with her friends and I figured she had went back out to rejoin them and I didn't want to bother her.
But then minutes turned into hours with no reply. I texted her again around 2 am (this is Sunday morning now and bars normally close at 2 am in the US) and asked her to lmk when she gets home safe. No reply. I texted her once more at 4:30 am and asked her if everything was okay and I told her I was feeling anxious.
I ended up texting one of my friends and asking him if she was home yet. She's staying with him at the moment until she gets her own apartment. I trust both of them completely so let's not get into the topic of her possibly cheating on me with him.
Disclaimer: I knew she didn't have service at the fire. I've been to these bonfires multiple times before in the past. I understand that since she had no service, there's no way she'd be able to update me while she was there anyway. However, she could've told me when she left the bar to go to the fire and that she'd text me when she could but she didn't say anything.
Again, back to the story:
She ended up replying around 6 am telling me that she got into a fight (again I knew there was a high chance of this happening). I called her and she gave me a full breakdown of what happened. Other than some pulled hair and some scratches and bruises on her arms and legs she was in one piece and that's all that mattered to me. I told her that I was proud of her for not starting it but finishing it, I loved her, and I was glad she was in one piece. We got off the phone and she went home with her friends.
Another key detail: Turns out, the friend I texted earlier asking about my wife actually went out with them so he had no service either. I didn't know he went out with them.
When she got home she went to sleep and woke back up around 2:30 pm (Still Sunday). I won't give details throughout the rest of that day. I ended up going to sleep around 4 pm her time (1 am on Monday my time. I'm on 12 hour shifts on this deployment). I texted her at this time that I was going to bed and I loved her. No response.
She didn't reply to me until 11:30 am on Monday her time. She said she needed to talk to me. So I called her. No answer. She texted me. The conversation went something like this:
Her- "I need to talk to you about something"
Me- Calls her but she declined it
Me- "What is it?"
Her- "You do realize I get no service out there right?"
Me- "Yes I don't get service out there either"
Her- "So why are we freaking out when i'm not texting back while out there"
Me- "Because I didn't know if you were still there or not and you didn't tell me when you were leaving the bar to go to the bonfire either so I didn't know what was going on. I didn't know if you had left the bonfire and just didn't tell me or what"
(^since she didn't say anything beforehand I figured she was already at the fire)
Her- "I'll text you when I get the chance cause you already know that there was bs going on last night. And from now on no more texting other people asking if I'm okay. Other than that I'm done talking to you right now"
Me- "Okay"
After the conversation I was at work and was frustrated with her. I didn't have the time or energy to argue with her so I just left it at that. It's now currently 8 pm on Monday her time and she's active on social media and not talking to me. I haven't reached out to her and I won't because I respect her need for space in times of conflict and just as an avoidant overall. However, as an anxiously attached person, my stress levels are through the roof. The fear of her leaving me is running rampant through my mind and all the self soothing in the world isn't helping right now.
I just wish she would see it from my point of view and understand and actually try to make better decisions to help me when I'm feeling anxious. I know it's not her job to regulate my emotions but as my spouse I believe it's the bare minimum to make sure I feel secure in our relationship.
None of my anxiety is coming from a place of distrust in her. I trust her, but I still have anxiety from previous relationships where my trust was violated. I'm working on it but it's still hard some days.
Anyway I think that's pretty much it. If anyone has any HEALTHY tips on what to say next time we speak, I would really appreciate it. I'm really big on communication and comprehension, so I'm not afraid to have hard conversations. I want to understand from her point of view why she's upset but I also want her to understand where I'm coming from without her feeling attacked. I want to have a conversation, not an argument.
Also, if you're just gonna suggest that I leave her or be negative, don't bother. I love her and I want to be with her and I want to make sure we both walk away from this conversation with at least a better understanding of how we can prevent this from happening in the future.
If you read the whole thing, thank you for bearing with me because this was a lot to type out. If I forgot any details I will try to clarify as needed. Thank you again.
TL/DR: Wife went out, didn't update me, so I was feeling anxious. She got upset and I need tips on how to move forward with this conversation.

I have been part of a large group of 6 people including myself. It all started with four of us and we added on two more girls as we meet them. I’m a more outgoing type of person. I like to talk to you and meet a lot of new people. This has been something that has always distanced me from this group of friends because they seemed very into only being the six of us and I am the only one who has strong relationships with people outside of the group. These other girls are also substantially more wealthy than me and, not to be rude, but they haven’t had to work for anything in their life. My family is much further from the wealthy side and If want something, I have to work for it. For example, one of these girls just sent her mom a link to 100$ worth of clothing and asked for it and her mother just bought it. If I wanted branded clothes, I would have to pay for it with my money. Most of these friends and I also play the same sport, but I am by far the best at it. I’m not trying to brag, but I have national rankings and a much better record than any of my friends. I have never held these things above their heads or even mentioned them. But as of recently, I have noticed how much they leave me out. Two of them, one of what used to be my best friend, went on a trip to Florida together that I know I could never have afforded. One of these girls also sent me a very very long text message talking to me about how she doesn’t like when I talk to and hang out with girls who aren’t part of our core six. This seemed crazy to me because I didn’t think my friend should have an issue with me having other friends but they had a problem with it. They said me talking to other girls makes them insecure and feel like I think I am better than them. But they are putting words in my mouth. I never said that. I feel like they are just casting all of their over issues and insecurities onto me because I have the most independence and the most success out of all of these girls. Again, I have NEVER said this to them. I have depression and a lot of anxiety and could never dream of talking to another person like that. Another girl recently told me I needed to apologize to her because I have made her uncomfortable when I complimented her. This is undoubtably because I’m gay but I DO NOT have a crush on this friend (she is just hyper religious). I said I’m sorry but also voiced my options on how they have been treating me as a group and excluding me and I was told that I am making this a big deal and that I make them feel insecure and uncomfortable. But how? After three years of friendship with some of these girls, why do they now suddenly hate me. Every time one of them reaches out to me and says something negative, and I try to explain my side, they tell me that I’m being rude and I need to just do what they say. Tell me I’m changing and I’m not the girl that used to be friends with, but of course I’ve changed. It’s been three years since we first met, do they expect me to be stuck in middle school forever? And I’m confident in myself and my own beliefs. I know I’m smart and I know I have social awareness so I don’t think that I am truly a bad person and that all of the accusations are making her true. But also I have known these people for years and I just don’t understand why they hate me all of a sudden. I’ve started to move on and gain close relationships with other people, but it just hurts to know how these people who acted like they loved me for years can so easily switch for no apparent reason. I don’t think they understand how depressed they made me. There was a week span where I could barely go to school without crying every time I saw one of them because I was so anxious they were going to go home and text me something rude and make me reconsider my whole identity again. These girls break me down, tell me to change everything about myself, and then ask if they these girls break me down, tell me to change everything about myself, and then ask if i want to still be friends want to still be friends. I don’t know what to do or how to feel. I feel so guilty because I love these girls and I don’t want them to think otherwise or that I don’t care about them but I can’t to this to myself anymore. I can’t control how they feel and they keep telling me how much I make them insecure and things like that but I really don’t see how because I have never once been mean to them. besides this we have never been in a fight. And this doesn’t even feel like a fight, it just feels like a one-sided war. They tell me what I do wrong. They tell me what to change. They tell me what they want me to do and i just say I’m sorry over and over again, but it’s never enough. I don’t think I’ll ever be enough for them. Because I can’t control their feelings, I’m not going to change myself to fit their every little need, and I’ll never be straight, wealthy, and privileged like they are. I just think they can never see my side of things no matter how I try. I don’t know how to feel anymore I’m just numb.

In most cartoons, there is a very clear divide between good and evil when it comes to villains. You have the good guys who are clearly good, and the bad guys who are clearly, unabashedly EVIL - at least in the old days, while now they tend to lean more towards 'shades of gray' and sympathetic antagonists, even if they do a kind of bad job at it.
However, who were some 'this is totally the bad guy' era bad guys that...maybe had a point?
One example off the top of my head is Edgar from Aristocats. He was kind, loyal, and too good care of Madame and her cats and her entire home by himself. He clearly had no ill will towards the cats and tolerated a kitten climbing on his face to bat at his hat without any fuss or surprise - this was likely something that happened a lot. He kept Madame company and took good care of an aging and lonely old woman.
Without having any family to inherit her fortune, it only seemed logical that she'd leave everything she had to the person who was there for her more than any other - who tolerated living in a tiny, rather uncomfortable looking little room while there was a whole mansion of empty, lavish rooms that he could have taken - he probably could have moved into any one of those rooms without Madame even noticing, but he didn't. He respected her, and did his job well. However, Madame said that she was, instead of leaving her money to him, going to leave it to her cats.
Now, this would've been easy for him to get around - it's not like the cats could decide what happened to that money after she passed, so Edgar would basically be controlling it anyway - but how insulting and dehumanizing is it to have your life, all the work and companionship you've given - put below the value of a literal animal? A pet? He'd been serving her for who knows how many years, and he was put on a level below a PET.
Even then - he never tried to harm them. If he'd killed the cats and hidden the bodies, he would've gotten away with everything scot-free - it's not like the horse or mouse could say anything about it if they knew at all, but clearly they didn't realize what had happened at all until he told them. He could've just implied they ran away the same way as he did in the movie, only with them having no chance of coming back. It would all around have been MUCH easier for him to have straight up poisoned their food rather than just putting them to sleep, toss the bodies, and enjoy his new wealth.
However, he did not do that. He instead gave them sleeping medicine, very carefully took them out to the countryside - we don't know where his final destination was, as the dogs caused him to lose the cats, but he clearly never intended for them to be harmed - just AWAY.
When they found their way back, instead of killing them - AGAIN - he just tried to send them away again, only much further this time.
Now I get that from the perspective of people watching, it looks like he's evil and greedy, but the people in this world clearly don't know animals can talk and think. They aren't on the same level as people. Edgar took care of Madame and her cats loyally for who knows how many years, he provided her with companionship, with care, keeping her home clean and comfortable, giving her AND her cats rich hand-prepared meals and being kind and compassionate - and she put him below the level of an animal. That insult alone would've had a lot of people packing up and leaving, but Edgar was clearly living there and probably wouldn't really have anywhere to go or another job lined up quick if he just up and left because of how dehumanized he'd been and how she clearly valued him less than a pet. His logic of thinking the nine lives would mean each cat would actually live around twelve years was...pretty off, but that's silly Disney type logic and it's pretty well demonstrated that he's not the smartest guy.
Overall, I think his reaction - while not RIGHT - was reasonable, and he got pretty shafted in the end. I mean...he got kicked by a full grown horse into a chest that was going to be shipped to the other side of the world. He's probably dead.

In and out and back and forth. 10 years. Having children with others, not sticking in any relationship too long. Reuniting and sparks flying, and beautiful words exchanged. Falling deeper in love. Healing, growing, seeing their growth (a runner DM). SO IN LOVE-- did i mention that? lol ugh my heart.
But-- 2 weeks ago he said he loves me. I never expected that or needed it bc I KNEW... I knew. But he said it and then slowly began to disappear. Less texts. New job so got the 'busy' excuse. Still sweet and definitely not as cold as he would get before (i called him out on that).
This is the farthest we've gone. We haven't been physical this time and probably for good reason right now. We both believe things unfold at the right time. But omg... the desire on both sides wow
Yesterday I finally snapped and said I want a LIFE with him. The mess and the fun and the good stuff. Everything. It was placed in me to do so-- my cards said to just make it known, so I did. He replied better than I thought. I told him to either come get me or leave me alone. He could have just left me alone the last 2 years where we were in separation and i ignored his 2 reach outs for a year!
But in his response, there was no "I don't want that" or "you're crazy" but just that he's been busy, his job is taking a lot out of him, he understands where I'm coming from-- that he gets that i want to just give my all, and that he did say he loves me (he wrote it out which is so huge) but that i didn't need to write so much. (i know he was irritated, i always know his tone even in text). I believe words are powerful. Choosing the right words parlays different meanings. He took 6 hours to reply to not pop off. He didn't say no, but he didn't say yes. I am hopeful but should I be? At least my intentions are known.
Well, I just replied it was how i felt, and left it at that.
It's been a day and no contact. I don't know if he will. I won't bc i have to stand on what i said-- damn ego. i dont know. I have loved him for so long despite some of the shit we've done to each other.
But this time feels different. he didn't bark at me or blame shift. Actually, i was impressed at his growth and quite proud of him. I just am still going nuts bc I just want him here in my arms.
Maybe we're in one of the later stages of twin flame reunion, idk.
His birthday is soon-- should I message? Stupid birthdays.

Im going a bit insane and I need someone to tell me how things are straight up.
I was with my ex of 8 years, from 21 to 29. We were intially really happy together until the 4-5 year mark. Our issues came from us growing up into very different people, with different interests, but more importantly different emotional attachment styles.
I tried everything I could to tell him what I needed and he would try for a bit then stop. I wasn’t asking for much in my opinion, i just wanted more time with him and more affection. He would always choose to hang with his friends over me, never message me or reply to me when I texted him, never invited me to join him when he made plans, and would always make me feel like i was needy when I knew I was asking for the bare minimum. I compared myself to other couples around me of the same timeline and i was always jealous that they looked like they actually got along and wanted to spend time together. Anyway, he wasnt a bad human, he was a nice guy so I accepted the bare minimum (or less) just cause I thought “at least im not getting cheated on”. My parents ended up asking us to get engaged (were indian, so its pretty normal to expect that especially after dating for 8 years)— he told my parents he would and he promised me he would as well. Then bailed, hard, he waited for the day before a trip I planned to tell me he cant do it. After promising me and my parents he would. He told me I was perfect for him, it wasnt about me but about him. He felt like he simply wasnt ready for marriage and wanted some time to travel, etc. So then I bargained with him (I know, ew), I asked him if we could just be engaged quielty to appease my parents, i even told him we dont need to get engaged now if he can just give me another date/ timeline. He refused. So i told him i had to leave and he didnt stop me. Funny part is when my mom was on the phone with me the week before we broke up, she asked me what if i was excited to get married and I said no, not really, im not 100% sure i want to marry him but im probably just jaded cause weve been together for so long.
Anyway, despite everything, i begged him back for 2 weeks after, he stayed firm. So then i moved across the country and got on anti-depressants.
Its been 2 years since, ive found another boyfriend who I am much happier with. All was going well until my ex called me begging me back a month ago, now he does it every week. And its fucking with me. I was waiting for him to say all these things to me that hes saying now, and it hurts so much because a big part of me will always love him—but outside of the marriage thing, I knew we had compatibility issues, also do i deserve to be with someone who was ok with loosing me? Dont i deserve more?
Then why am i confused? why am i even sad? Why am i now comparing my new relationship with my old one?
My new relationship is not without problems of course. Compatibilty wise were perfect but hes not as financially stable as my ex. Someones I wonder if my ex is the safer option, and am I just acting on emotions right now, do feelings and shit even matter for long term success?
I appreciate any feedback. I cant be alone in my head anymore.
Thank you in advance.
tldr; should i get back with my ex?

Im going a bit insane and I need someone to tell me how things are straight up.
I was with my ex of 8 years, from 21 to 29. We were intially really happy together until the 4-5 year mark. Our issues came from us growing up into very different people, with different interests, but more importantly different emotional attachment styles.
I tried everything I could to tell him what I needed and he would try for a bit then stop. I wasn’t asking for much in my opinion, i just wanted more time with him and more affection. He would always choose to hang with his friends over me, never message me or reply to me when I texted him, never invited me to join him when he made plans, and would always make me feel like i was needy when I knew I was asking for the bare minimum. I compared myself to other couples around me of the same timeline and i was always jealous that they looked like they actually got along and wanted to spend time together. Anyway, he wasnt a bad human, he was a nice guy so I accepted the bare minimum (or less) just cause I thought “at least im not getting cheated on”. My parents ended up asking us to get engaged (were indian, so its pretty normal to expect that especially after dating for 8 years)— he told my parents he would and he promised me he would as well. Then bailed, hard, he waited for the day before a trip I planned to tell me he cant do it. After promising me and my parents he would. He told me I was perfect for him, it wasnt about me but about him. He felt like he simply wasnt ready for marriage and wanted some time to travel, etc. So then I bargained with him (I know, ew), I asked him if we could just be engaged quielty to appease my parents, i even told him we dont need to get engaged now if he can just give me another date/ timeline. He refused. So i told him i had to leave and he didnt stop me. Funny part is when my mom was on the phone with me the week before we broke up, she asked me what if i was excited to get married and I said no, not really, im not 100% sure i want to marry him but im probably just jaded cause weve been together for so long.
Anyway, despite everything, i begged him back for 2 weeks after, he stayed firm. So then i moved across the country and got on anti-depressants.
Its been 2 years since, ive found another boyfriend who I am much happier with. All was going well until my ex called me begging me back a month ago, now he does it every week. And its fucking with me. I was waiting for him to say all these things to me that hes saying now, and it hurts so much because a big part of me will always love him—but outside of the marriage thing, I knew we had compatibility issues, also do i deserve to be with someone who was ok with loosing me? Dont i deserve more?
Then why am i confused? why am i even sad? Why am i now comparing my new relationship with my old one?
My new relationship is not without problems of course. Compatibilty wise were perfect but hes not as financially stable as my ex. Someones I wonder if my ex is the safer option, and am I just acting on emotions right now, do feelings and shit even matter for long term success?
I appreciate any feedback. I cant be alone in my head anymore.
Thank you in advance.
tldr; should i get back with my ex?

Hey guys! I am writing this because I was desperately searching for anything to help with where to start studying and prepping for the CLEP and I just passed so I thought I'd make a post about it. I passed by the skin of my teeth at 56, but I just needed the credits so I'll take it!! I did take two years of Spanish in high school but didn't pay attention or remember much. I'm sorry if this is all over the place and that it is really long but there is so much information I didn't know that I wish I had. If you are just looking for study resources, there are links at the end! Also, feel free to ask any questions as I'd love to help, and good luck with your exam!
First, I will start with an overview of the exam and some of the guidelines. I did the online exam because it was cheaper (an additional $30 rather than $130 at an in-person test center.) The exam has three sections. All questions were multiple-choice. The first section was a brief audio clip, with four SPOKEN options for A, B, C, and D. These can only be heard ONCE, and you get 10 seconds to choose an answer. These weren't too bad if you could pick up the main part of the sentence. For example, if the question began with, "Donde...", I knew the answer would have to be a location. The second part of the exam was longer audio clips like conversations between people, descriptions of places, etc., and 2-3 follow-up questions about the audio. These were more difficult. I tried to focus on jotting down names, places, and ANYTHING I could understand about what they were saying. The third part is the most important and it's the majority of your grade on the exam. It was conjugation, past tense, verbs, some vocabulary, etc. Hardest part but the practice websites give you a pretty good idea of what's to come.
Now, here's what I didn't know. The exam proctor can message you through your browser during the exam. In the first section of my exam, the proctor had a hard time seeing me and had me adjust my camera multiple times, even having me rescan my desk to ensure there wasn't anything around me. You aren't able to pause the exam, so I missed multiple questions due to having to adjust, re-adjust, and respond to the proctor... You get the point. But it really frazzled me. Another rule I was unaware of was that you need a whiteboard on the day of the exam. No paper is allowed. The proctor must also WATCH you erase your board before you disconnect or your scores will be invalidated. Before you see your scores, you will be asked if you want to send your scores to the institution you chose before or delete the exam. After this screen, you will be able to see your score (Only for Spanish without Writing.) The test will take 10-14 business days to send to the chosen institution, so keep that in mind when scheduling.
In total, I studied for a little under a month. I was on a time crunch and needed the test to be sent to my school in time for a deadline, so I had to bump up my test date. Would've started sooner if I had realized. If Spanish is completely new to you, I'd recommend a solid 3 months of studying a couple hours a day. If it is a refresher, you could probably get away with 1 month of studying. I paid for a lot of subscriptions and tests because I was desperate to pass so I got a good feel for which are worth it.
EXAMIAM-
If you are willing to spend money on ANY WEBSITE, I'd suggest this one. I haven't seen any posts about it but I wish more people knew! This is the closest thing to the actual exam because it is a released version of the CLEP. This practice exam is the only one where the audio clips are timed and only played once, so you get a feel for what it was like. The vocabulary is very similar. Pretty much spot on. It was $19 and you can retake the same exam an unlimited amount of times.
https://www.examiam.com/apps/myexams/purchase
NEA STUDY CENTER-
This was the most common test I had seen on Reddit. I bought it and took a couple of sections at a time, but never completed a full exam. This was MUCH harder than the actual exam, so maybe a good goal but I didn't feel it was necessary. The layout was the same as the CLEP test but audio sections can be replayed, unlike the actual exam. It was $14 and it comes with two practice tests that can be retaken.
https://studycenter.rea.com/site/register
INSTACERT-
I used this the most. This subscription comes with a 50-day program where you learn a little each day. There are videos, vocab lists, and worksheets that help with constructing sentences. It also comes with three practice exams that are a little easier than the actual exam, which may be because I took them so many times. Completed practice tests came with a detailed report on which sections you need to review. They also included links to specific videos to help. The program costs $20 a month which is steep if you plan to keep it for awhile but it was the only resource I found that helped me learn, instead of just testing.
https://www.instantcert.com/?gad_source=1&gclid=CjwKCAjwyJqzBhBaEiwAWDRJVBS0Ave_QfFwVMsQsrsjDj61MfWrd7H8M8rOEXiuA3JPBFb47EyxvBoC9poQAvD_BwE
DUOLINGO-
I bought Super Duolingo and would do about half an hour a day while watching TV or instead of TikTok. Definitely can't be your only resource but helped with vocabulary. Super is $13 a month but they offer free trials.
https://www.duolingo.com/practice-hub
I also purchased the Study Guide from CLEP but I didn't use it for studying. Only browsed for guidelines and rules on the exam. Don't suggest buying it. I tried ModernStates too because I heard a lot about it, but I didn't find it helpful. I'll still leave the link.
https://modernstates.org/
SPANISH PODCASTS-
The last study tip I recommend is listening to podcasts or videos regularly. This is the podcast I listened to:
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/spanish-conversations-for-beginners-series-1/id1672750403The

I (F22) was at a party yesterday.. my friend's (F22) ex-boyfriend (M22) kissed me. For context, me and her used to be quite close when we were younger, but we haven't spoken to each other in 6 months, not for any particular reason we just drifted apart. Furthermore, where we live it's also a super close community where people end up dating each other's exes and things like this happen quite often.
He told me (the ex, 22M) that they had broken up a year ago, and still did talk and were friends, but was never planning to get back with her due to their situation.
Now for the actual situation, me and this guy were in the train station yesterday after the party as we were heading in the same direction, I had forgotten my jacket and he offered me his, in my head I just thought this was friendly as I've known him for 5-6 years now. We sat down to wait for the train and as we were waiting I was just joking with him about the night and about how one of the other guys we had met was trying to kiss me and I wasn't having it, because I am currently in a 'situationship'.. He then looks at me and says "Are you sure there isn't another reason?" and grabs my face and kisses me.
I instantly pull back and tell him, I can't do this to my friend, and he says don't worry about it and continues to kiss me, at this point.. I 100% accept responsibility but I kissed back and then stopped to ask him more about the situation with him and my friend, where he told me they still talk, but are only friends.. however, he does tell me 'she doesn't have to know'.. and again we continue kissing (not an excuse; but to explain my state of mind at this time, I had 15 drinks and was high)
He then asked me to come home with him to which I instantly replied absolutely not.. and I told him that this could never happen again, it was a one-time slip-up and I would never want to hurt my friend, genuinely. He again tells me she wouldn't need to know and I should just come, but I shut it down immediately again. He gets off the train, and I kiss him again (unfortunately I also do not know how to explain my actions at this point, i am honestly embarrassed), but he leaves and tries to message me after but I ignore his messages. Also to clarify, no one saw us we were alone on a train carriage.
I have no intention of speaking to him again, nor am I remotely interested in him.. this was a one time mistake and I never intend for this to happen again with him or any other of my friend's ex's.. But now I am left with this feeling of guilt/uncertainty.. I do not want her to ever find out about this, but if she does I want her to hear it from me, he said he would never tell her or anyone else, and I do believe him.. but I'm just feeling guilty now and am not sure how to proceed.
I feel that telling her will hurt her more than anything.. because if I keep this secret it is not like something like this will ever happen again (I wholeheartedly have no interest in this guy)
Any suggestions for what I can do? Should I tell her, Should I leave it? What can I do
TLDR;
My friend 22F's ex boyfriend 22M, kissed me at a party. I (22F) kissed back as I was drunk realised my mistake and pulled away he kept coming in for more and after a point I just allowed it as I wasn't in the right state of mind (not an excuse, just explanation). What should I do, should I tell her?

TL;DR; recently moved in with grieving GF and I’m struggling to support her. She’s pushing me away and thinks I’m only motivated by sex (I am not). Need some advice pls
Okay buckle up. This is going to be a long and complicated tale. Apologies in advance.
I met my now girlfriend 3 years ago while travelling. We started off as friends in an amazing group of friends. My attraction for her was immediate and strong. All of us friends took a few road trips and went to a lot of parties. This is where we started, just dancing together and kissing and often ending the night cuddling and sleeping. There came a point where I wanted to initiate sex. She said to me “no we have such a nice vibe in the group and I don’t want that to change. We can make out and cuddle but I don’t want to have sex with you” this was fine with me, I agreed and we continued like that for months. The day eventually came that we left the country to start a new adventure; separately. We kept in contact and after 4-5 months we took a holiday together in Paris. It was so romantic and the feelings were still strong. This is where we first had sex. It was amazing and we were both full of love. After that we went back to our countries (we are from different countries) and a few more months went by and I was planning on going to Australia. So before going Australia we decided to meet up again in Europe; Prague then Paris. Same deal…feelings were strong but we had different plans and agreed to stay in touch.
It was when we said goodbye that we had an important conversation. I told her that although I’m going to Australia for a while, I’ll make some money there and save up to visit her in her country. I told her that I’d wait for her (not be with anyone else). She said: “no live your life, if you find someone or fall in love, it’s okay” I agreed but we continued to keep in touch. After a few months in Australia I slept with someone I met there and we had a casual “relationship” for a few months. We had unprotected sex a couple of times. But I got tested regularly and was all clear. I always asked to get tested for “everything” and they never mentioned HPV to me. Until recently I didn’t even know that men could get HPV (stupid I know). My testing centre doesn’t offer HPV tests for men (important). Things with the “new girl” started to get too intense for me. I wasn’t ready for a full relationship. I called it off and soon after that I went to meet up with my GF.
It’s now early December 2023. We had 6 weeks planned together. It had been 9 months since I had seen her and I figured that she may have met some guys on her last trip as well. I didn’t ask as it wasn’t my business. If she wanted to tell me she could! Same deal for me, I didn’t tell her but she didn’t ask.
We met again and it was fantastic. I got to meet her family and learn about her culture. We still had such a strong connection. It was the best feeling in the world to spend time together. Of course we also had an active sex life together. And on more than one occasion a condom broke (important).
About 2-3 weeks into the trip, her only sibling committed suicide. It was and still is so so terrible. But in a weird way I was glad to at least be there for her and her family. We all cried together and shared the pain. I helped where I could…a hug, wash the dishes, do the groceries, help to cook etc. she had an appointment with the gynaecologist that was booked the year before. When she came back she said she was positive for HPV (neither of us had had it before). We concluded that I probably passed it on to her from the person I slept with in Australia. She was angry but also understood that I didn’t know I had it and that I had been tested for “everything”. If I knew I would have told her. We got past that and things continued as normally as they could given the family situation.
I had to leave a few weeks after the event to attended to family stuff that had been planned for a long time. They all understood and I said bye. My GF had planned to leave her country and go to a new place where she can make better money in order to pay for funeral and family expenses. We made the plan together that I would come and be with her so that she wasn’t alone.
I arrived with her about 6-7 weeks ago and it’s been difficult (money, finding a job and nice place to live) but we’ve been making it work. It’s the first time we have lived together and it’s a big learning experience. It’s been 5 months since her sister died and there are good days and less good days.
I’m a very tactile person,I show love through touch a lot. Sometimes she thinking I’m trying to have sex when in fact I’m just coming to give her a hug.
She’s quite irritable a fair amount of the time, sometimes distant and quiet…sad, angry, confused…understandable given the trauma she’s processing plus living with me for the first time. I try to do so much. I cook almost every meal, I wash the dishes too, I clean the house, prepare her lunches to take to work, massage her feet at the end of everyday, take her to the cinema/dinner, sometimes I write a little positive note and hide it in her work bag. What I’m trying to say is that I really try so hard to make her life a little bit easier. I’m not looking for thank you’s but at the same time she very rarely says Thankyou and will often find something else to complain about. For example; I’ve washed and folded the clothes, cooked dinner and prepared lunch for her, cleaned the house but I forget to organise the desk in the room and she’ll make a scene of organising it. When I ask what’s up she says something like : “you didn’t organise the desk and now I have to after I’ve been working all day. You’ve spent all day in the house and you haven’t even done this”
I try not letting this stuff get to me but it does sometimes so I try to do more. The other day the guys at work invited me for ONE beer after we finished. They offer almost everyday and I normally say no because I want to go and be there for my lady, but I finally said yes. The next day she said I’m not there for her enough and that she really wanted to have a hug and a chat with me after work but instead I was out “drinking”….one beer oof. Anyways this is just bickering and normally doesn’t get in the way of our relationship. She’ll be a bit grumpy for a few hours or maybe a day and then we are good again.
The last week she was really affectionate with me and things were starting to seem a bit more easy. Then for the last 3 days she’s been really distant. Every time I say “I love you” she replies with silence. I told her “hey I’m here for you okay? If you want to talk about anything I’m here” And she said “no you’re not but I’ve got some friends here who are. I’ll talk to them”
At some point in these days she received a call from the gynaecologist to say she need to have a check up again. She didnt mention it to me.
After work yesterday, she came home late and smelling of alcohol. She seemed tipsy so I asked if she was drunk. She said no but I didn’t buy it. I said “you’re funny, I love you” and kissed her head. She was silent. I asked her “why haven’t you replied when I say I love you?” She said “you lie”. Confused I asked what she meant. She started to tell me she got the call from the Doctor and was reminded about the HPV and I should go back to Australia to be with the other chick. She said that I just want to have sex and that I’m “just like everyone else”. Apparently it’s “my game to tell all the girls that they are special and that I love them just to have sex”. Eventually we slept and the conversation continued in the morning. She said things like “well played, you kept texting me when you were fucking her and when it didn’t work out with her you had me as your second choice” (while laughing), “I don’t want to have sex or be with you like that” “all you want is sex”
I have to say; I don’t only want sex. Sometimes it happens but she wanted to every time. If she says she doesn’t want to, we won’t have sex. I just want to be there for her. I don’t know why she thinks I just want her for sex. Surely she knows I care about her deeply given all of the experiences we have gone through together.
Both of our feeling are valid but she seems to be able to throw this relationship very easily which is hurtful!
What should I do in this situation? I’m I being an asshole?
PS: She’s taking therapy and while I was looking for some paper to write on I accidentally found a note for her upcoming therapy session. Saying that: I only care about how I look, I only want sex and that she thinks I like men?! Not sure how to tackle this either. Should I mention I found the note? These are things we have spoken about and I’ve explained that I need to dress properly and style my hair for the new job. I don’t normally care how I look. I’ve tried to explain that I don’t only want sex and that I just want to be there for her. And when we met we opened up about being curious about the opposite sex. It’s clear that I like women a lot and I’ve never had an experience with a guy. But if these are things she wants to tackle in therapy they must seem really significant to her. I feel like she doesn’t understand me or my intentions at all. How can I fix that??
Thanks for reading, sorry it’s so long! ♥️

I know I know. The title sounds weird. But it is not what you think.
Here is the back story. I'm a 20 year old guy. My mom and dad divorced when I was 16. Two months later my dad committed suicide. During the divorce no one would talk to me about the why. Afterwards it was overshadowed by my dad's suicide. Because of all that happened that period in my life is a blur. So I don't really remember when Joey started dating my mom and when he moved in, but it can't be that long after I lost dad. Joey and I are cordial. I don't hate him, but I don't like him either. A year ago Joey and mom got engaged. And since her parents have already died, she wanted me to walk her down the aisle.
2 months ago it would have been my dad's 40th birthday. Ever since his suicide it is a somber day for me. I was really close with my dad so it still hits me. I took a half day off work because I needed some time for myself. I came home ad heard my mom and her sister talking in the kitchen. They didn't see me, and they were talking about dad. Not sure the precise wording but the conversation went something like this Aunt: was a good husband and provider. I still don't get why you choose Joey. Mom: Because I was tired of him and Joey was exciting, still it to be honest. I do feel bad that he found out. I understand the divorce when he found out, but killing himself was a bit too far. Aunt: Come on, you know you were his world, he moved here for you. His family disowned him for you, He worshiped the ground you walked on. Mom: He could still have had me if he accepted that I was also seeing Joey.
When I heard that I quietly walked away. This is how I found out that my parents divorced and my dad committed suicide because my mom was cheating with Joey. The same Joey who is marrying my mom. And mom did not even have any remorse.
I left home and went to my best friend Tessa. She was the only one I could go to to cry. I told her everything, and she let me stay the night.
In the next two months I applied for and interviewed for a job on the other side of the country. And I got accepted. I did everything with my mom preparing for her wedding. In the meantime I quite my job and made plans to move away. The company I applied to was arranging for housing for the first year. I arranged to fly down there and move in on the day of the wedding. In the meantime I send everything I needed to my new home. I sold my furniture on facebook, and the last days I stayed at Tessa's
I was making my own plans for the wedding and came up with a few over the top plans, Like having a bluetooth speaker hidden in the venue play a prerecorded message somewhere during the wedding ceremony. But I went with a cheaper solution; giving the MC of the night an envelop with a note he should read and $100 to make SURE he reads it regardless of the reactions.
The note said
"Dear mom.
By now you have noticed I'm not there. I can't be part of your big day since I've learned it is on top of the blood of my father. I know you and dad divorced because of your affair with Joey. The same joey that is standing besides you. I don't know what the trigger was, but this directly contributed in dad's suicide. I can no longer be part of your live knowing this. You will never hear or see me again.
Goodbye forever."
I could have written something more poetic, but I'm just not that good at it.
The wedding was Saturday. I called mom in the morning hearing how excited she was etc etc. and then I left for the airport. Leaving my phone on the table in my small apartment. No doubt they have already found it, with a copy of the note, in case the original plan somehow didn't work.
I wish I could tell you what the reaction was at the wedding. I'm hoping everything went according to my plan, but I have no way to confirm. My best friend is the only one that has my new contact info, and she wasn't invited to the wedding. I'm now sitting in my new apartment, drinking a beer, browsing on reddit. Tomorrow I'm going to my new job, signing the last papers, getting my access badge, a tour of the company etc etc. And Tuesday will be my first day on the job.

Hi,
I'm a foreign Australian attorney who has recently moved to Minnesota to get married. I'd love to be able to eventually practice law in this state but according to the rules I seemingly keep hitting a catch 22 and want some clarifications.
I contacted the Minnesota State Board of Examiners who advised that yes unfortunately as it currently stands I currently am not eligible for admission in Minnesota and my two options were:

1. To obtain a local ABA approved J.D. degree and be admitted. I'd happily take this option if it weren't so crushingly prohibitive financially.
   
2. To petition the supreme court for a waiver of the rules. They advised that this is possible but very Unlikely. Or;
   
3. To be admitted in another jurisdiction like NY and transfer over after 5 years of practice.
   

I enquired further about the third option asking if I would have to leave Minnesota and was advised that I wouldn't and could get a job as an in house counsel or similar. At which point I became very confused. If I'm allowed to practice certain types of law while in Minnesota without being admitted in Minnesota (but admitted in NY), where is the line and what is the distinction? Could I practice areas of federal law for example like immigration, etc? Or would I have to take a job from NY remotely to stay in Minnesota? I do see a fair few job listings for big companies that just ask that you be admitted in any state but I really am not sure how that would work.
Needles to say I'm a little lost.