Example letters of introducing myself as a new employee
Brand New Sentence
2018.07.26 01:42 Gaenya Brand New Sentence
For sentences never before written, found in the wild.
2011.03.18 22:47 noonches Dating for the Dating Impaired
Dating for the dating impaired. 18+ only. Positive comment karma required. Put your location in your title. Post flair is required and needs to be correct. No surveys or forms allowed. Don't be an ass and don't post a pic of yours.
2011.05.27 04:26 papermario13689 Manga Swap: Buy, Sell, Trade.
2024.05.19 13:24 baltimore-aureole Urban real estate crisis – is a “doom loop” the same as a death spiral?
 | https://preview.redd.it/k8457xokad1d1.png?width=214&format=png&auto=webp&s=307adce84cafc2965bb483d4adcf31d8dd7ee576 submitted by baltimore-aureole to economy [link] [comments] Photo above - America's $2 trillion office skyscraper market is imploding. Can Tareq and Christina help transition it to affordable housing? Suppose someone told you that the big city office vacancy rate was 20%. Would you consider this a crisis? Or would you wait for a government response which said that “vacancy rates are complicated, and not all methods arrive at the same 20% number. Some are as a low as 3.4%” . . . ? The US vacancy rate actually IS 20% (see link below). And nobody in DC is yet claiming the numbers are bogus. However, the month isn't over yet and those stats were just released on Friday. And this IS an election year. There aren't many office towers where I live. However, I DO know that about 20% of the stores are vacant at the 2 malls I still visit. I buy about 20% of my stuff on Amazon now. Dishwasher tabs delivered on Friday. I did not have to scour the 3rd class mail adverts from supermarkets to figure out which – if any – store was having a sale this week. I'm gradually moving to an “all Amazon” purchase model. I still buy fresh fruits, frozen foods, and eggs/milk at the grocery store. And heavy stuff like cases of water and soda. But I got a gallon of canola oil from Amazon earlier this month. $2 less than Piggly Wiggly. If Amazon ever gets shoe sizes right, it's doom-ocalypse for mall shoe stores. Back to office vacancies. I don't blame myself for empty offices, like I do with malls. I'm just fighting inflation when I shop Amazon. I have nothing to do with why millions of people are suddenly working from home. That's entirely on congress. In addition to adding about $7 trillion to the national debt, covid lockdowns proved lots of people can work from their dining rooms and almost impersonate being at the office. The only people NOT allowed to work from home appear to be government employees. Can we see if senators and house members can be kept home? And can we lock them out of Zoom so they pull less stuff on us while WE are working? How much is 20% of the office marketplace worth? The Columbia University study in the link below doesn't say. So I googled “total US office space” (11 billon square feet) and multiplied it by $200 (2023 cost per square foot of office space transactions). It comes to . . . $2.2 trillion. Which seems high if you're an ordinary wage slave like me. Or low, if you visit any city and gaze up at something like Trump Towers. In any case, those vacancies mean potentially $400 billion in loan defaults. About the same as the 2008 bank bailouts during the real estate crisis. Will we be seeing Tareq and Christina launching a new “flip or flop” show to rehab Trump Towers into something else, after Letitia James seizes it in court? The Columbia study suggests that vacant office towers in places like Manhattan, Los Angeles, San Francisco should be turned into apartments. After all, we ARE having an affordable housing crisis too. But before we put the pedal to the metal on that, maybe we ought to commission a study on who actually wants to live in an urban high rise, with high taxes, high crime, and high grocery prices. Suppose they're happier living in the 'burbs, and working from their suburban dining rooms, 40 miles from downtown? I'm just sayin' . . . ~'Vicious cycle': US office vacancy levels hit record high — are we on the precipice of an 'urban doom loop?' (msn.com)~ |
2024.05.19 13:22 AnnaG341 What Do You Think I Should Do?
Hi. I started a new job in March this year. Initially, it was going fine; my coworkers were helpful and kind. But as time passed, significant pressure was applied on our team of five by different departments in the company. Work from last year was reviewed by another department and a mistake was found. That mistake was caused by an employee who no longer works for the business and is no longer a team member since she left last year, but our entire team was nonetheless slandered and word has apparently spread throughout the company about our team being careless.
A meeting was held with members of those in the different departments, and two of my team members, as well as our manager, and apparently it was extremely vicious. One of the individuals from the other department said that we shouldn't be paid, that we're useless etc and one of my team members, who has worked the longest at the company, broke down crying. Our manager did nothing to defend our team. He, for the most part actually, seems fairly clueless about what we do everyday, and it is the team member who has worked the longest, and has the title of 'senior', and who was assigned to train myself when I came in on March, that has all of the knowledge.
I now feel extremely fearful to make a mistake. So fearful. My anxiety has been eating away at me for the months I have been here because of that pressure and last night I felt myself have a sort of breakdown, dissociation. I think my breaking point was a mistake my team member, who is also fairly new and was hired at the same time as me, accidentally making a mistake in the spreadsheets. This mistake happened once before, when we were first brought on, but it was resolved. I had not caused that issue, nor had the new co-worker.
This recent issue has affected some of our work as well, and my senior (the woman who trained us and was there the longest), on Friday, started declaring loudly that she "can't stand us", and that she is "sick of us" etc. Basically distancing us from herself even though she does the same work as us. She was yelling and declaring this loudly, and because we work in an open space, other employees as well as managers overheard her saying this. One even chuckled. I was surprised by the senior's behavior, as she has never exhibited this before.
I think the pressure of being so scrutinised has affected me. This incident was a mistake, and I feel sick to my stomach at the idea of me making any mistake. There is also pettiness and much gossip about our team going on around us and it's been grinding me down. I haven't been eating properly even prior to this incident. I've been crying for the past few days. I feel so sick. Everything came crashing down on me last night and I felt myself break down.
I want to look for another job. I don't think I should be under so much immense pressure, it's so shocking to me. I don't know what to do from here.
submitted by AnnaG341 to careerguidance [link] [comments]
A meeting was held with members of those in the different departments, and two of my team members, as well as our manager, and apparently it was extremely vicious. One of the individuals from the other department said that we shouldn't be paid, that we're useless etc and one of my team members, who has worked the longest at the company, broke down crying. Our manager did nothing to defend our team. He, for the most part actually, seems fairly clueless about what we do everyday, and it is the team member who has worked the longest, and has the title of 'senior', and who was assigned to train myself when I came in on March, that has all of the knowledge.
I now feel extremely fearful to make a mistake. So fearful. My anxiety has been eating away at me for the months I have been here because of that pressure and last night I felt myself have a sort of breakdown, dissociation. I think my breaking point was a mistake my team member, who is also fairly new and was hired at the same time as me, accidentally making a mistake in the spreadsheets. This mistake happened once before, when we were first brought on, but it was resolved. I had not caused that issue, nor had the new co-worker.
This recent issue has affected some of our work as well, and my senior (the woman who trained us and was there the longest), on Friday, started declaring loudly that she "can't stand us", and that she is "sick of us" etc. Basically distancing us from herself even though she does the same work as us. She was yelling and declaring this loudly, and because we work in an open space, other employees as well as managers overheard her saying this. One even chuckled. I was surprised by the senior's behavior, as she has never exhibited this before.
I think the pressure of being so scrutinised has affected me. This incident was a mistake, and I feel sick to my stomach at the idea of me making any mistake. There is also pettiness and much gossip about our team going on around us and it's been grinding me down. I haven't been eating properly even prior to this incident. I've been crying for the past few days. I feel so sick. Everything came crashing down on me last night and I felt myself break down.
I want to look for another job. I don't think I should be under so much immense pressure, it's so shocking to me. I don't know what to do from here.
2024.05.19 13:18 pillowcase-of-eels [Music] Emilie Autumn's Asylum, pt. 6 – High-concept musician responds to online criticism by waging successful attrition war against her own fanbase
🪞
Welcome back to the Asylum write-up, where we explore the decade-long slow-motion car crash that is the Emilie Autumn fandom.
Sorry this installment took so long to upload! Just a heads-up, I may take some time to deliver the last one too – these posts take forever to format on Reddit's finicky-ass editor, and my dumb real life is currently keeping me from precious Internet time. Thank you for your patience! You have my word that everyone who pre-ordered the final installment will receive a PERSONAL, HANDWRITTEN letter autographed and illustrated by me, a list of the snacks I consumed while composing this write-up, some exclusive behind-the-scenes secrets, and a pony.
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4.1 – Part 4.2 Part 5
This created a sort of primordial rift within the fanbase, between those who supported EA's right to speak her mind and regulate her own fan spaces however she pleased – and those who thought that her reactions were rude and inappropriate (at best), and that even fan spaces should allow for reasonable, non-abusive criticism of the artist.
Between a poorly-handled book release (see Part 3), the controversial (Part 2) or dubiously true (Part 4) contents of said book, and serious shade from various former collaborators (Part 5), more and more fans had pressing thoughts about EA's work ethic and choices. EA attempted damage control through drastic forum rules that made it virtually impossible to voice any “serious” critical opinion. It didn't work, of course: instead of squashing the mutiny, she created a schism.
Critical fans and active haters started congregating on unofficial platforms.
Either way, through these blogs, a number of potential drama bombs that had mostly flown under the radar were dredged up from over the years – some of which were hard to ignore, even for supportive fans. Where to begin?
There was that nonsense in-joke song, captured twice on camera during the 2009 tour (to very little outrage, at the time), crassly called “Manatee Retard”📺. Or EA's scathing response, in print, to a wheelchair user who found it insensitive that she used a bedazzled wheelchair as a prop to do sexy acrobatics on stage. (“Your offence taken at my hard-won self-acceptance proves that I indeed have something to fight against”, she wrote). Spoken word tracks where she made trivializing knock-knock jokes about serious mental illnesses she didn't have, like schizophrenia and OCD. Multiple instances of calling Britney Spears a “bimbo” and a “Hollywood fucked-up”, resentfully claiming that she only shaved her head because she was “hopped up on drugs” and certainly not because she was “bipolar”, a word the press liked to wield as an insult anyway. (“That's almost like calling someone a retard!” Yeah, heaven forbid.) The meanest, most distasteful paragraphs in the book. Basically everything problematic EA had ever said or written.📝 In retrospect, it had been a long time coming, but it was a lot to take in – and certainly more off-putting, even to less emotionally invested fans, than silly lies about her age and last name.
In another wing of Asylum Tumblr, some fans had had it up to here and just wanted to have fun. 🎵 If Plague Rats had learned one valuable lesson from EA, it was how to crack a joke in the face of absurd tragedy – and the general state of the EA fandom certainly warranted a few.
In 2012, Fight Like a Girl was released. After six long years, three of which had been peaceful, the Opheliac era was officially over. The new album and ensuing tour confirmed that the Asylum had entered a process of glamorous Broadway-style militarization. 🎵📺
The mood board was “Roman general meets Vegas showgirl meets Victorian street urchin”.🪞 The color palette was, to naysayers, “musty pink and rotten, stale piss yellow”. 🐀 The keyword was “REVENGE” (through the power of... self-expression! sorority! brutal assault with rusty medical implements!). The chorus of the title song had an intriguing run-on line about getting “revenge on the world, or at least 49% of the people in it” 🎵 – which seemed like an awful lot, and was widely interpreted (to cheers, boos, or uncomfortable sighs) as a misandrist jab at literally all men on Earth.
The show was essentially a demo version of the musical, in that the setlist vaguely reflected the order of events in the story – but prior reading was essential in order to get what the hell was going on on stage. This one Broadway reviewer had not perused the literature before seeing the show 🔍, and hated: the set, the choreography, the skits, the plot, the lyrics, the music, the concept. (Seriously, you should read the review. It's not even my show and I feel like quitting show business.)
Pre-show VIP encounters, now violin-free, were lorded over by EA's new manager🐀, whose official title was “Asylum Headmistress”. (Interesting choice – she sounds fun!) The swag bags were less substantial than before, and the “greet” part of the meet-and-greet was rarely more than a quick hug and photo op.
On Twitter, EA continued to embrace her “I am very badass” fronting attitude...
Spurred on by EA's rallying cries and “us vs them” mentality, loyalists turned the white-knighting up to 11. On Twitter, some Plague Rats got into cat fights with Lady Gaga's Little Monsters (what a time to be alive). Others tried to balance out the Tumblr negativity with initiatives like “Spreading a Plague of Love” – a “positive-only” confession blog, whose extreme fangirling, comically drastic rules and hyper-defensive tone📝 did not debunk the increasingly popular notion that “true Plague Rats” were a bunch of authoritarian and hopelessly brainwashed fanatics.
EA truthers and other anti-fans started lashing out at anyone who dared express any positive opinion of EA, solidifying claims that the backlash against EA was just a conspiracy of bitter, hysterical bullies.
All this to say: every passing day brought new reasons for fans to get mad at EA and each other, and everyone in the Asylum was in need of a laugh. It's not easy having a good time.🦠
Leading up to Fight Like a Girl and in the years that followed, user-submission-based meme blogs took off, most notably “Spreading a Plague of Lulz / Troll Like a Girl”. A lot of the early submissions were absurdist humor and toothless, cheezburger-Impact memes (a style that was, oddly, already dated at the time). Those often originated in good fun, and from loyal fans, on the official forum. But there was also true snark, satirizing EA's questionable ethics, outrageous claims, and easily spoofed artistic gimmicks. A new slang of Asylumspeak emerged: Glittertits (slight NSFW), GAGA!!, EA Gusta and all its memeface variants, Get outta mah house!, Are You Suffering?, Fight Like A Goat, [Random celebrity] copied EA (a subgenre in its own right), ...
Most of the “trolling” was directed at unrepentant bootlickers and, to a lesser extent, red-in-the-face haters and creeps. Meme blogs would post joke comments under “serious” or gushing submissions on Wayward Victorian Confessions, and taunt loyalist accounts by tagging them in their posts. When a few people complained on WVC that almost all of the Bloody Crumpets to date had been thin white able-bodied women, and a few fans responded by sharing their dream-casts for a more diverse line-up, the blog was flooded for days with confessions that “X should be a Crumpet” (candidates included RuPaul, Mitt Romney, Nicki Minaj, EA's therapist, and the WVC admins). Farcical shenanigans like that.
Ah, but some people will always cross the line, won't they. EA threads popped up on merciless, bully-friendly snark platforms like Lolcow, Pretty Ugly Little Liar, and Encyclopedia Dramatica. Snarkers with a mean streak and obsessive haters mingled in some of the more aggressive, 4-chan-spirited retaliation against EA – which would be called “brigading” in modern parlance. This included flooding EA's Goodreads page with one-star reviews (see part 4), repeatedly editing her Wikipedia page to include her legal name and birth year, and ensuring that Googling said name would bring up current pictures of her.
All of this compounded agitation fragmented the once-united fandom beyond recognition.🦠 Through substantial disagreements among fans, personal bickerings, layers upon layers of inscrutable in-jokes, and cross-platform telephone games, the Asylum morphed into a booby-trapped Escher room.
Satire blogs were taken in earnest. Earnest fan blogs scanned as satire. Memes would get called out as abuse. Appreciation without attached criticism would get mocked as bootlicking. Obvious jokes made by EA would be taken at face value. One divisive confession could trigger days and days of debate, to the point that WVC eventually banned confessions in response to other confessions. New waves of infighting created a confusing web of rival sub-factions🐀, each accusing the others of being toxic, cliquish, and delusional.
The shared fantasy was broken, the collective vision had crumbled, no onez was speaking the same language anymore. Fans would jump down the throat of other fans who held almost identical views about EA, except for that one thing she said or did that one time. Everyone had differing thoughts on what should or shouldn't acceptable to discuss, question, excuse, make fun of.
War is hell.
That's not entirely fair: unlike EA, the czar only did it that once.
By early 2013, as EA was gearing up for her third Fight Like a Girl tour at the end of the year, the official forum was... not as lively as it once had been. Not just because of the stifling rules and disgruntlement towards EA, or because EA herself hadn't really posted anything on there in years; the Internet was also changing, and forums in general were fast becoming passé.
This made it difficult for EA to create a safe space where she could talk to fans, and fans could talk to and about her, in a way she deemed suitable (ie, a space she could gate-keep and regulate enough to keep it completely free from negative criticism). Social media was a minefield; she still posted regularly, but didn't interact very much. So EA and the Headmistress came up with a way to filter out the unbelievers: an official fan club📝, aptly called the “Asylum Army”, with a $100 entry price.
Joining the AA came with a dog tag, a sew-on patch, and a lifetime membership certificate signed by EA and – for some reason – the Headmistress. (Unlike EA's best friend and sound engineer back in the forum's heyday, I don't think fans ever really embraced the FLAG-era manager as part of the Asylum in-group. She came across more as a coordinator / businessperson / adult chaperone, at best.🐀) So, slightly better goodies than you'd get by joining the other AA 🔍 ... but not by much. The main appeal was that members would have access to exclusive content, special merch, giveaways, early bird tickets for future shows, and regular video chats with EA.
The concept itself drew a fair amount of criticism, as you can imagine. Between the name🐀, the price, and the inherent gatekeeping of a pay-to-join fanclub, many balked at the monetizing of a concept that had once (like, three years back) been significantly more DIY, grassroots, and inclusive. 📝🐀
Then again, many also longed for a positive, drama-free space where fans could just be fans. And while the creation of the AA was generally recognized as a quick cashgrab, a lot of people were surprisingly cool with it. EA was trying to finance her dream musical, after all – although a number of fans wished she had gone about raising funds in a less sketchy way.
So around 400 fans shelled out (which, according to the Headmistress📝, “basically cover[ed] the cost of running the fanclub itself – keeping the database up, website, etc.”). Enough for a close-knit, but sizable community. But already, there was a conflict of interest: a high fanclub entry fee essentially demands that you pledge loyalty to the artist over loyalty to your fellow fans, who wish to join but can't afford to. Sharing, caring, and ensuring no one felt left out were some of the more positive values cultivated in the fandom... but leaking exclusive content would surely piss off other paying members🐀, and make EA feel betrayed all over again. (And she had barely just started to mellow out on social media!)
...But then again, this is the internet. After the first month of secret AA drops (lyric sheets, some photoshoot outtakes – nothing too juicy, really), there were, yes, some leaks. EA was predictably miffed, and retaliated by... ghosting the fanclub for weeks at a time in its first few months of existence (great look!). She eventually found the “solution” to her problem, by providing something you couldn't right-click-save (and which had been part of the promised perks to begin with): live interaction.
Over webcam, she was her usual in-person bubbly, charming, funny self. Everyone seemingly had a good time during the fanclub video chat, and this gave people faith and hope.
There were a few more events, giveaways, etc. As promised, ahead of the fall 2013 tour (the last one to date, it would turn out), AA members got priority access to show tickets and VIP bundles. The latter were much pricier than before, and only included soundcheck, a photo-op, and three goodies: a tin of loose-leaf tea, a signed printer-paper setlist, and a small flag that said “F.L.A.G.”.🔍 Some stuff continued to leak – but, as some of the outlaws pointed out (scroll down to the Disqus comments), they were mostly relaying information that was relevant to the entire fanbase, such as updates about ongoing projects (the dragged-out recording of the audiobook, for one).
In early 2014, lifetime memberships were closed, and replaced with monthly, quarterly and yearly subscription tiers. Bizarrely, you ended up paying $3 more per month if you bought a $99 yearly subscription📝 – but it did include the patch, dog tag, and piece of paper!
For the still-too-poor or still-undecided, there was always the forum! It wasn't as active as it used to be, but a few die-hards still managed to keep the lights on... until, inevitably, Someone Did Something and Ruined Everything. (Once again: EA's wrath is spectacular, but rarely completely unprovoked.) The incident features one notable figure in the Asylum community. Let's call him the Collector.
OK, so maybe you remember the meme I linked to in Part 4, with Christian Grey and the ginormous EA hoard. Well, that's the Collector's collection. The “Violin” promo that I called the "Holy Grail of the fandom" in the same paragraph? Also his. The handwritten lyrics that went for $940? Guess who won that auction. Over the years, the Collector had probably spent five figures on EA merch and shows, and although that fact was a little unsettling, he was a very active, easy-going, and generally well-liked fixture of the fandom.
One day in 2012, shortly after the Headmistress had replaced EA's old Chicago BFF as main forum admin, the Collector's account got banned or restricted over something dumb. When the ban wasn't lifted as quickly as he hoped, he took it... the way one takes things when one is unhealthily invested: he started spamming Headmistress and the mod team with increasingly rambling and abusive emails (lost to time, probably for the best). When that didn't work quickly enough, he tried a different route.
One of the many auctions that the Collector had won, some years prior, was EA's old iPod Touch📝 – which contained all of her favorite tunes and, buried somewhere in the data cache... a phone number. Which the Collector tried calling. And wouldn't you know it: EA picked up. She congratulated him on his sleuthing skills, listened patiently as he made his case, apologized for any distress caused by the unfair account restriction, and then they got married.
Kidding! She freaked the fuck out, hung up, and banned him for life from the forum and all EA shows and events.
After his ban, the Collector allegedly still tried to attend at least one VIP pre-show (one source in the comments says he was allowed to buy some merch, refunded for his ticket, and escorted out). He joined the Reform forum to bitch about EA and try to rally people to his cause, possibly made revenge posts about her on darker snark forums, and continued to hound the Asylum mod team. So in June 2014, EA came up with a radical and unexpected fix to the Collector problem.
The obliteration of the forum took everyone by surprise...
...Well, no point in living in the past. For those who could afford it, and still wanted to talk to/about EA after that (not everyone did 🐀), there was always the Asylum Army fanclub!
Over the summer of 2014, EA held regular live chats and Q&A's, and... many attendees really enjoyed them, and thought the AA was well worth the money after all. She also quietly parted ways with the much poo-pooed Headmistress around that time.
Turns out the fanclub had been the Headmistress' idea all along. EA had been reluctant from the start, and although she really enjoyed the live chats with a safe community of people “who are there for the right reasons”, she couldn't overcome her fundamental discomfort with the concept. Lifetime and regular members would receive a bunch of digital downloads and a -35% coupon on the Asylum Emporium for their troubles. EA said she would definitely pop back once in a while for live chats, for free, just for fun, but to my knowledge, she never did.
And so the most devoted fans were left standing in the rain...
But there were no chats or live shows anymore. There was only social media, where she ignored questions and vague-posted about overdue projects – and the newsletter📝, which was all saccharine love-bombing to promote bland dropshipped trinkets. For fans who remembered the handcrafted merch (and two-way communication) of the early years, it was a bitter pill to swallow.
submitted by pillowcase-of-eels to HobbyDrama [link] [comments]
Welcome back to the Asylum write-up, where we explore the decade-long slow-motion car crash that is the Emilie Autumn fandom.
Sorry this installment took so long to upload! Just a heads-up, I may take some time to deliver the last one too – these posts take forever to format on Reddit's finicky-ass editor, and my dumb real life is currently keeping me from precious Internet time. Thank you for your patience! You have my word that everyone who pre-ordered the final installment will receive a PERSONAL, HANDWRITTEN letter autographed and illustrated by me, a list of the snacks I consumed while composing this write-up, some exclusive behind-the-scenes secrets, and a pony.
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4.1 – Part 4.2 Part 5
Places, everyone This is a test Throw your stones Do your damage Your worst, and your best (...) And if I had a dollar For every time I repented the sin And commit the same crime I'd be sitting on top of the world today (“God Help Me”, 2006🎵)Quick recap of where we left off. First, there were five to ten halcyon years of pleasant and meaningful interactions between EA and her blossoming fanbase, prominently by way of her official forum. Then, circa 2009-2010, EA's online presence shifted towards sudden anger outbursts, ban-hammering, and an increasingly top-down communication style.
This created a sort of primordial rift within the fanbase, between those who supported EA's right to speak her mind and regulate her own fan spaces however she pleased – and those who thought that her reactions were rude and inappropriate (at best), and that even fan spaces should allow for reasonable, non-abusive criticism of the artist.
Between a poorly-handled book release (see Part 3), the controversial (Part 2) or dubiously true (Part 4) contents of said book, and serious shade from various former collaborators (Part 5), more and more fans had pressing thoughts about EA's work ethic and choices. EA attempted damage control through drastic forum rules that made it virtually impossible to voice any “serious” critical opinion. It didn't work, of course: instead of squashing the mutiny, she created a schism.
Critical fans and active haters started congregating on unofficial platforms.
“WITH MUFFINS LIKE THIS, WHO NEEDS ENEMIES?”: TROLL LIKE A GIRL
So here we were, the early 2010s. The official forum (which had about 700 members in 2006, if you recall) was now thousands-strong, reaching just over 12,000 registered users in 2012 – not all of them active, but still. In terms of sheer numbers and content creation, the party was POPPIN'... but increasingly in parts of the Asylum that escaped EA's jurisdiction, such as Tumblr, where they could speak their mind freely.You play the victim very well You've built your self-indulgent hell You wanted someone to understand you Well, be careful what you wish for, because I do (“I Know Where You Sleep”, 2006🎵)In one wing of Asylum Tumblr, a smattering of call-out blogs emerged, which laid out EA's various lies, faux pas, shitty takes, and general deep-seated terribleness in detailed timelines and screenshots (or, short of that, long-winded bullet points). While many such blogs framed it as “serious” whistleblowing and did their best to remain as fact-based and neutral as they could, there was some genuine disgust, animosity and creepiness towards EA on that side of Tumblr; for some ex-fans, “exposing the truth” was mostly justify obsessive hatred, prying and verbal abuse. Some, for instance, felt the bizarre need to side with EA's mother in their estrangement. (One user, with the URL “emilyautumnfischkopf”, argued in a serious and down-to-earth tone - but with zero sources - that EA's upbringing had been nothing but peaceful and supportive until she ungratefully kicked her loving family to the curb for no reason at all. They were later revealed 🔍 to have an alternate handle as “eaisalyingcunt”.)
Either way, through these blogs, a number of potential drama bombs that had mostly flown under the radar were dredged up from over the years – some of which were hard to ignore, even for supportive fans. Where to begin?
There was that nonsense in-joke song, captured twice on camera during the 2009 tour (to very little outrage, at the time), crassly called “Manatee Retard”📺. Or EA's scathing response, in print, to a wheelchair user who found it insensitive that she used a bedazzled wheelchair as a prop to do sexy acrobatics on stage. (“Your offence taken at my hard-won self-acceptance proves that I indeed have something to fight against”, she wrote). Spoken word tracks where she made trivializing knock-knock jokes about serious mental illnesses she didn't have, like schizophrenia and OCD. Multiple instances of calling Britney Spears a “bimbo” and a “Hollywood fucked-up”, resentfully claiming that she only shaved her head because she was “hopped up on drugs” and certainly not because she was “bipolar”, a word the press liked to wield as an insult anyway. (“That's almost like calling someone a retard!” Yeah, heaven forbid.) The meanest, most distasteful paragraphs in the book. Basically everything problematic EA had ever said or written.📝 In retrospect, it had been a long time coming, but it was a lot to take in – and certainly more off-putting, even to less emotionally invested fans, than silly lies about her age and last name.
In another wing of Asylum Tumblr, some fans had had it up to here and just wanted to have fun. 🎵 If Plague Rats had learned one valuable lesson from EA, it was how to crack a joke in the face of absurd tragedy – and the general state of the EA fandom certainly warranted a few.
In 2012, Fight Like a Girl was released. After six long years, three of which had been peaceful, the Opheliac era was officially over. The new album and ensuing tour confirmed that the Asylum had entered a process of glamorous Broadway-style militarization. 🎵📺
The mood board was “Roman general meets Vegas showgirl meets Victorian street urchin”.🪞 The color palette was, to naysayers, “musty pink and rotten, stale piss yellow”. 🐀 The keyword was “REVENGE” (through the power of... self-expression! sorority! brutal assault with rusty medical implements!). The chorus of the title song had an intriguing run-on line about getting “revenge on the world, or at least 49% of the people in it” 🎵 – which seemed like an awful lot, and was widely interpreted (to cheers, boos, or uncomfortable sighs) as a misandrist jab at literally all men on Earth.
The show was essentially a demo version of the musical, in that the setlist vaguely reflected the order of events in the story – but prior reading was essential in order to get what the hell was going on on stage. This one Broadway reviewer had not perused the literature before seeing the show 🔍, and hated: the set, the choreography, the skits, the plot, the lyrics, the music, the concept. (Seriously, you should read the review. It's not even my show and I feel like quitting show business.)
Pre-show VIP encounters, now violin-free, were lorded over by EA's new manager🐀, whose official title was “Asylum Headmistress”. (Interesting choice – she sounds fun!) The swag bags were less substantial than before, and the “greet” part of the meet-and-greet was rarely more than a quick hug and photo op.
On Twitter, EA continued to embrace her “I am very badass” fronting attitude...
Often wonder if cyberbullies r aware they’re fucking w/ a girl who’s BFs w/ maker of the SAW films & is marrying a knife-throwing scorpion. (🐀📝)...and her taste for needlessly inflammatory statements. About an aisle sign in a supermarket:
If this does not infuriate you, then you're a fucking potato.(Again with the confounding crypto-ableism, EA! 🔍) She also went through a phase of raging against Lady Gaga 📝, who had stolen her idea of using a wheelchair on stage as an able-bodied woman. 🔍 That failed to convince anyone that she wasn't the histrionic diva that haters made her out to be.
Spurred on by EA's rallying cries and “us vs them” mentality, loyalists turned the white-knighting up to 11. On Twitter, some Plague Rats got into cat fights with Lady Gaga's Little Monsters (what a time to be alive). Others tried to balance out the Tumblr negativity with initiatives like “Spreading a Plague of Love” – a “positive-only” confession blog, whose extreme fangirling, comically drastic rules and hyper-defensive tone📝 did not debunk the increasingly popular notion that “true Plague Rats” were a bunch of authoritarian and hopelessly brainwashed fanatics.
EA truthers and other anti-fans started lashing out at anyone who dared express any positive opinion of EA, solidifying claims that the backlash against EA was just a conspiracy of bitter, hysterical bullies.
All this to say: every passing day brought new reasons for fans to get mad at EA and each other, and everyone in the Asylum was in need of a laugh. It's not easy having a good time.🦠
Leading up to Fight Like a Girl and in the years that followed, user-submission-based meme blogs took off, most notably “Spreading a Plague of Lulz / Troll Like a Girl”. A lot of the early submissions were absurdist humor and toothless, cheezburger-Impact memes (a style that was, oddly, already dated at the time). Those often originated in good fun, and from loyal fans, on the official forum. But there was also true snark, satirizing EA's questionable ethics, outrageous claims, and easily spoofed artistic gimmicks. A new slang of Asylumspeak emerged: Glittertits (slight NSFW), GAGA!!, EA Gusta and all its memeface variants, Get outta mah house!, Are You Suffering?, Fight Like A Goat, [Random celebrity] copied EA (a subgenre in its own right), ...
Most of the “trolling” was directed at unrepentant bootlickers and, to a lesser extent, red-in-the-face haters and creeps. Meme blogs would post joke comments under “serious” or gushing submissions on Wayward Victorian Confessions, and taunt loyalist accounts by tagging them in their posts. When a few people complained on WVC that almost all of the Bloody Crumpets to date had been thin white able-bodied women, and a few fans responded by sharing their dream-casts for a more diverse line-up, the blog was flooded for days with confessions that “X should be a Crumpet” (candidates included RuPaul, Mitt Romney, Nicki Minaj, EA's therapist, and the WVC admins). Farcical shenanigans like that.
Ah, but some people will always cross the line, won't they. EA threads popped up on merciless, bully-friendly snark platforms like Lolcow, Pretty Ugly Little Liar, and Encyclopedia Dramatica. Snarkers with a mean streak and obsessive haters mingled in some of the more aggressive, 4-chan-spirited retaliation against EA – which would be called “brigading” in modern parlance. This included flooding EA's Goodreads page with one-star reviews (see part 4), repeatedly editing her Wikipedia page to include her legal name and birth year, and ensuring that Googling said name would bring up current pictures of her.
All of this compounded agitation fragmented the once-united fandom beyond recognition.🦠 Through substantial disagreements among fans, personal bickerings, layers upon layers of inscrutable in-jokes, and cross-platform telephone games, the Asylum morphed into a booby-trapped Escher room.
Satire blogs were taken in earnest. Earnest fan blogs scanned as satire. Memes would get called out as abuse. Appreciation without attached criticism would get mocked as bootlicking. Obvious jokes made by EA would be taken at face value. One divisive confession could trigger days and days of debate, to the point that WVC eventually banned confessions in response to other confessions. New waves of infighting created a confusing web of rival sub-factions🐀, each accusing the others of being toxic, cliquish, and delusional.
The shared fantasy was broken, the collective vision had crumbled, no onez was speaking the same language anymore. Fans would jump down the throat of other fans who held almost identical views about EA, except for that one thing she said or did that one time. Everyone had differing thoughts on what should or shouldn't acceptable to discuss, question, excuse, make fun of.
War is hell.
SCORCHED EARTH SHENANIGANS: HONEY, I SHRUNK THE ASYLUM
Would you tear my castle down Stone by stone And let the wind run through my windows Till there was nothing left But a battered rose? (“Castle Down”, 2003🎵)Haters vs sycophants is not really the kind of conflict where one side can come out on top (if you're participating, you've already lost). But in the long tug-of-war between “grassroots” and “EA-sponsored” fan spaces, the ultimate winner is obvious – in that the former is gasping in agony, a shriveled husk of its former glory, while the latter... is non-existent. This is due in no small part to EA's tendency, like the Czars of old, to settle conflicts by setting Moscow on fire.🔍)
That's not entirely fair: unlike EA, the czar only did it that once.
By early 2013, as EA was gearing up for her third Fight Like a Girl tour at the end of the year, the official forum was... not as lively as it once had been. Not just because of the stifling rules and disgruntlement towards EA, or because EA herself hadn't really posted anything on there in years; the Internet was also changing, and forums in general were fast becoming passé.
This made it difficult for EA to create a safe space where she could talk to fans, and fans could talk to and about her, in a way she deemed suitable (ie, a space she could gate-keep and regulate enough to keep it completely free from negative criticism). Social media was a minefield; she still posted regularly, but didn't interact very much. So EA and the Headmistress came up with a way to filter out the unbelievers: an official fan club📝, aptly called the “Asylum Army”, with a $100 entry price.
Joining the AA came with a dog tag, a sew-on patch, and a lifetime membership certificate signed by EA and – for some reason – the Headmistress. (Unlike EA's best friend and sound engineer back in the forum's heyday, I don't think fans ever really embraced the FLAG-era manager as part of the Asylum in-group. She came across more as a coordinator / businessperson / adult chaperone, at best.🐀) So, slightly better goodies than you'd get by joining the other AA 🔍 ... but not by much. The main appeal was that members would have access to exclusive content, special merch, giveaways, early bird tickets for future shows, and regular video chats with EA.
The concept itself drew a fair amount of criticism, as you can imagine. Between the name🐀, the price, and the inherent gatekeeping of a pay-to-join fanclub, many balked at the monetizing of a concept that had once (like, three years back) been significantly more DIY, grassroots, and inclusive. 📝🐀
Then again, many also longed for a positive, drama-free space where fans could just be fans. And while the creation of the AA was generally recognized as a quick cashgrab, a lot of people were surprisingly cool with it. EA was trying to finance her dream musical, after all – although a number of fans wished she had gone about raising funds in a less sketchy way.
So around 400 fans shelled out (which, according to the Headmistress📝, “basically cover[ed] the cost of running the fanclub itself – keeping the database up, website, etc.”). Enough for a close-knit, but sizable community. But already, there was a conflict of interest: a high fanclub entry fee essentially demands that you pledge loyalty to the artist over loyalty to your fellow fans, who wish to join but can't afford to. Sharing, caring, and ensuring no one felt left out were some of the more positive values cultivated in the fandom... but leaking exclusive content would surely piss off other paying members🐀, and make EA feel betrayed all over again. (And she had barely just started to mellow out on social media!)
...But then again, this is the internet. After the first month of secret AA drops (lyric sheets, some photoshoot outtakes – nothing too juicy, really), there were, yes, some leaks. EA was predictably miffed, and retaliated by... ghosting the fanclub for weeks at a time in its first few months of existence (great look!). She eventually found the “solution” to her problem, by providing something you couldn't right-click-save (and which had been part of the promised perks to begin with): live interaction.
Over webcam, she was her usual in-person bubbly, charming, funny self. Everyone seemingly had a good time during the fanclub video chat, and this gave people faith and hope.
There were a few more events, giveaways, etc. As promised, ahead of the fall 2013 tour (the last one to date, it would turn out), AA members got priority access to show tickets and VIP bundles. The latter were much pricier than before, and only included soundcheck, a photo-op, and three goodies: a tin of loose-leaf tea, a signed printer-paper setlist, and a small flag that said “F.L.A.G.”.🔍 Some stuff continued to leak – but, as some of the outlaws pointed out (scroll down to the Disqus comments), they were mostly relaying information that was relevant to the entire fanbase, such as updates about ongoing projects (the dragged-out recording of the audiobook, for one).
In early 2014, lifetime memberships were closed, and replaced with monthly, quarterly and yearly subscription tiers. Bizarrely, you ended up paying $3 more per month if you bought a $99 yearly subscription📝 – but it did include the patch, dog tag, and piece of paper!
Sometimes I kind of want to be part of the cool kids and register to the Asylum Army. Then I remember how it came about, what you could get for the same price a couple years ago, how the whole thing was and is handled, and that I won’t support any of this bullshit. (And then I roll around naked in all the money I’m saving.) (🐀)Still, a number of fans rejoiced at the affordable monthly option, and joined – if not for the exclusive content and merch (which were... okay, but not much to write home about), then for the friendly, drama-free exchanges with an artist they actually did love, in spite of all the frustration.
For the still-too-poor or still-undecided, there was always the forum! It wasn't as active as it used to be, but a few die-hards still managed to keep the lights on... until, inevitably, Someone Did Something and Ruined Everything. (Once again: EA's wrath is spectacular, but rarely completely unprovoked.) The incident features one notable figure in the Asylum community. Let's call him the Collector.
OK, so maybe you remember the meme I linked to in Part 4, with Christian Grey and the ginormous EA hoard. Well, that's the Collector's collection. The “Violin” promo that I called the "Holy Grail of the fandom" in the same paragraph? Also his. The handwritten lyrics that went for $940? Guess who won that auction. Over the years, the Collector had probably spent five figures on EA merch and shows, and although that fact was a little unsettling, he was a very active, easy-going, and generally well-liked fixture of the fandom.
One day in 2012, shortly after the Headmistress had replaced EA's old Chicago BFF as main forum admin, the Collector's account got banned or restricted over something dumb. When the ban wasn't lifted as quickly as he hoped, he took it... the way one takes things when one is unhealthily invested: he started spamming Headmistress and the mod team with increasingly rambling and abusive emails (lost to time, probably for the best). When that didn't work quickly enough, he tried a different route.
One of the many auctions that the Collector had won, some years prior, was EA's old iPod Touch📝 – which contained all of her favorite tunes and, buried somewhere in the data cache... a phone number. Which the Collector tried calling. And wouldn't you know it: EA picked up. She congratulated him on his sleuthing skills, listened patiently as he made his case, apologized for any distress caused by the unfair account restriction, and then they got married.
Kidding! She freaked the fuck out, hung up, and banned him for life from the forum and all EA shows and events.
After his ban, the Collector allegedly still tried to attend at least one VIP pre-show (one source in the comments says he was allowed to buy some merch, refunded for his ticket, and escorted out). He joined the Reform forum to bitch about EA and try to rally people to his cause, possibly made revenge posts about her on darker snark forums, and continued to hound the Asylum mod team. So in June 2014, EA came up with a radical and unexpected fix to the Collector problem.
The official Asylum Fan Forum has been shut down permanently. I have personally paid thousands of dollars each year to keep the forum safe and secure for you ... Unfortunately, the forum has not been kept safe and secure for me, a truth which disappoints me greatly, instead becoming a place where people who have physically threatened myself and my staff prey upon forum members, pressuring them to contact me and my staff on their behalf. If the gullible wish to humor my stalkers (who live in their parent’s basement at age 30 something) and thus put me in danger, they may do it on their own dime. They may also fuck off, because stupidity can kill, and I won’t be your victim. To those who enjoyed the forum, you know who to thank for its closure. (“On the closing of the Asylum Forum”)Voilà! This is how a decade-long archive of shared history ends: not with a bang, but with a dirty delete and a sod-off communiqué.
The obliteration of the forum took everyone by surprise...
I was actually on the forum when it was taken down. I was navigating between posts and when I went to click on a different board, an error message came up. I honestly cried a little, I'm not ashamed to say. (WVC admin on Reddit, 2024)...and I do mean everyone:
Chicago BFF / ex-admin, the next morning: Whoa, EA forum shut down? Ex-mod: It turns out that if someone spends enough years actively “waging war” to destroy what they can’t have, eventually they’ll be successful. * eye roll * Not even mods got prior warning. Just all the sudden, poof, gone. BFF: Really? She did not let the moderators know?! This is sounding worse and worse. Uggh. I’m so sorry. Such a loss. (...) Ok, threats are serious, but why not just put it in archive mode so no one can post? (...) Sad. I shall light a candle in the forum's honor. (Facebook posts; scroll down for screenshots)It was a gut punch, especially for people who had poured countless hours into the community, or could have used some prior warning to save years of their own writing from the role-playing threads. One last chance to take a look around the place that had meant so much to so many.
From the wording of the announcement of closing the forum and a number of other things, it sometimes seems like EA doesn't like her fans much. :/ (🐀)Three months after the forum was nuked, Battered Rose (a venerable EA fansite, which had been around since the Enchant era and had one of the most complete EA galleries online) announced that it was shutting down too.📝 The admin, who had also been a long-time forum mod, cited a lack of “time, energy, passion, or money” to keep the website going... and being upset at the sudden disappearance of the forum. It was, truly, the end of an era for the Asylum.
...Well, no point in living in the past. For those who could afford it, and still wanted to talk to/about EA after that (not everyone did 🐀), there was always the Asylum Army fanclub!
Over the summer of 2014, EA held regular live chats and Q&A's, and... many attendees really enjoyed them, and thought the AA was well worth the money after all. She also quietly parted ways with the much poo-pooed Headmistress around that time.
Just spent over 4 hours giggling, drinking tea and playing guessing games in chat with EA and other Asylum Army members ... No griping, no downers, just lots of fun. I think I like the way the ‘new fandom’ is going and now I’m really glad I finally decided to join the Army. (September 4, 2014🐀; Battered Rose had closed the day before)The forum was lost forever, but perhaps that was a chance for a fresh start. Could this fanclub thing really be the Asylum Renaissance that fans had been longing for?
...I have come today to a very difficult but necessary decision, and that is to discontinue the Emilie Autumn Official Fanclub. The site itself, and the community chatroom, will remain open to you indefinitely, but I will no longer be making updates to the site. (Newsletter, September 8, 2014📝)...Never mind, then.
Turns out the fanclub had been the Headmistress' idea all along. EA had been reluctant from the start, and although she really enjoyed the live chats with a safe community of people “who are there for the right reasons”, she couldn't overcome her fundamental discomfort with the concept. Lifetime and regular members would receive a bunch of digital downloads and a -35% coupon on the Asylum Emporium for their troubles. EA said she would definitely pop back once in a while for live chats, for free, just for fun, but to my knowledge, she never did.
And so the most devoted fans were left standing in the rain...
She is happy, she made it. She is fulfilling her dreams, found love and happiness after all the pain. I understand that she now doesn’t need “us” anymore ... That doesn’t change the fact she broke my heart with taking the Asylum Army and the forum from me. Yet, I am happy for her. (🐀)...while naysayers pointed and laughed, Nelson-style.🦠
I don’t feel sorry at all for the people that paid for the Asylum Army fan club. Most of them knew that EA is an atrocious business woman and has broken many promises before. In fact, I laugh at them. They seriously thought that EA would actually stay consistent with this? (🐀)
EVERYTHING MUST GO: THE ASYLUM WHOLESALE
EA fans were left without an “official” home for about three years. This gave them plenty of time to be annoyed at EA for: not releasing the audiobook on time, not materializing any new project for a while... and the new sin of peddling random, ridiculously marked-up AliBaba jewelry as “merch” on her official store. Think faux-antique cameo pendants and $30 Big Ben rings (...because the Asylum story is set in London, get it?).The whole accessories section looks like a tacky overpriced English souvenir shop. (🐀)The fanbase lost a lost of steam in those in-between years, because there wasn't much to stick around for. As evidenced by the positive reception of the AA live chats, even in the midst of unresolved drama, out-loud interactions in a friendly environment have always been EA's saving grace. Considering the amount of online hate, there are shockingly few accounts of bad IRL encounters with EA: most people say that in live conversation, she comes across as a fun, warm, and genuinely sweet person. Some report that their negative opinion shifted after meeting her.
But there were no chats or live shows anymore. There was only social media, where she ignored questions and vague-posted about overdue projects – and the newsletter📝, which was all saccharine love-bombing to promote bland dropshipped trinkets. For fans who remembered the handcrafted merch (and two-way communication) of the early years, it was a bitter pill to swallow.
CONTINUED IN COMMENTS
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2024.05.19 12:57 GuiltlessMaple Best Cartier Nail Bracelets
 | submitted by GuiltlessMaple to u/GuiltlessMaple [link] [comments] https://preview.redd.it/ul739gam6d1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=90d9cd6866b1fe5e9e6c5237607226d238feaa68 Discover a new world of luxury with Cartier's stunning collection of Nail Bracelets. With their exquisite craftsmanship and timeless elegance, these bracelets are the perfect addition to any wardrobe. Featuring a variety of designs and materials, our roundup of Cartier Nail Bracelets is sure to inspire your next jewelry purchase. Read on to explore the many styles and options available, and find the perfect piece to express your own unique style. Whether you're looking for a statement piece to make a bold fashion statement or a more subtle accessory to complete your look, our selection of Cartier Nail Bracelets will have something to suit your taste. From gold and silver to precious gemstones, these exquisite bracelets are the epitome of high-end fashion and craftsmanship. Keep reading to learn more about these fabulous jewelry pieces. The Top 6 Best Cartier Nail Bracelets
Reviews🔗Cartier Love Bracelet, Small Model, Pink Goldhttps://preview.redd.it/ez0vy4sm6d1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=99066c5e2d154730c1b2b7e16facf153abe4912c I've been wearing a Cartier Love Bracelet, small model, in rose gold for quite some time now. It's not just an accessory; it's a statement piece that has become a significant part of my daily style. The first thing that grabbed my attention was its unique screw design, which symbolizes an eternal bond. Even more appealing is the rose gold tone, which adds a touch of romance and elegance to the bracelet. One of the highlights of this bracelet is its versatility. It goes perfectly with any outfit, whether it's casual or formal. And though it's a small model, it feels very sturdy on my wrist - a testament to Cartier's craftsmanship. On the flip side, since it's made of rose gold, I find myself needing to clean it more often than I would with other metals. This doesn't bother me too much though, as I enjoy taking care of my jewelry. Overall, the Cartier Love Bracelet has been a wonderful addition to my jewelry collection. Its timeless design and symbolism make it an ideal gift or a personal treat. 🔗Cartier Love Bracelet, Small Model - Yellow Gold Bracelet for Womenhttps://preview.redd.it/9ch7c4en6d1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9f3d4071c6262cced569f6ff40316eb5cf11d74a Imagine wearing this golden bracelet that's like a lock for your wrist. It's called Cartier's Love Bracelet, and it doesn't just look beautiful, but it also has a story behind it. This bracelet was designed in 1969 by a very talented man named Aldo Cipullo. He made it to show love that lasts forever, kind of like when you screw a lid on really tight to keep your favorite toy safe. When you put it on, it gives you that feeling of being locked in love, just like how a key and lock keep a secret. Wearing it on your wrist is like wearing a secret that only you know, all wrapped up in a warm golden color. To pick the right size, you just need to measure your wrist as you would for other bracelets, and then add one or two centimeters to get the perfect fit. This bracelet is part of the LOVE collection, so it has a lot of company from other beautiful and meaningful pieces of jewelry. 🔗Small Pink Gold Cartier Juste Un Clou Bracelethttps://preview.redd.it/soy640tn6d1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7b2146cab53dab0fafbaf70706f94c0042f289d1 As I slip on Cartier's Juste Un Clou Bracelet, Small Model - Bracelet Pink Gold, I can't help but feel a sense of sophistication and boldness. The bracelet, inspired by the simple nail, has been transformed into a statement piece by Cartier. Its 18-karat rose gold construction and sleek rhodium finish give it that touch of luxury that I absolutely adore. However, I do find the clasp a bit too tight, making it slightly difficult to take off and put on. Overall, though, it's a stunning addition to my jewelry collection that's sure to garner attention and compliments. 🔗Cartier Juste Un Clou Bracelet - Gold Nail Bracelethttps://preview.redd.it/jpn2tv9o6d1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3f271c26f1872b507282f65a7a1f22d4dfdd1f97 As a product reviewer for Cartier's Juste un Clou collection, I am absolutely smitten with its modern twist on the classic nail bracelet. Imagine walking down the street, your wrist encased in a stunning piece of jewelry that's not just a statement, but an ode to the rebellious spirit of the '70s. The golden hue of this bracelet never fails to catch the eye, while the hinge's ridged detailing adds a touch of industrial chic. However, be prepared for the weight of this bracelet, which some may feel is a tad too heavy for extended periods of wear. Overall, it's clear that Cartier has taken the ordinary and elevated it to the extraordinary with their Juste un Clou collection. If you're looking for a unique statement piece that pays homage to the carefree spirit of the '70s, this is definitely the bracelet for you. 🔗Cartier 18K White Gold Juste Un Clou Bracelet, Size 20https://preview.redd.it/6gsarsoo6d1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a29d227c4f4ad955f3becbf327a9b6cf34e7c8d9 In the world of luxury fashion and timeless elegance, Cartier's Juste Un Clou bracelet is undoubtedly a standout. As a user of this beautiful 18K white gold piece, the first thing that grabbed my attention was the design. Inspired by a basic nail, the bracelet's bold lines and sleek curves exude a sense of power and confidence. Every time I wear it, compliments are guaranteed. Performance wise, the bracelet's solid white gold construction ensures durability and a touch of opulence that never fades. Its sturdy clasp makes it easy to put on and remove, and I can confidently say that it stays securely on my wrist all day. On the downside, this is undoubtedly an investment piece. The luxury price tag might deter some, but let me tell you, the quality and craftsmanship make it an absolute worthwhile purchase. Plus, you're not just buying a bracelet, you're investing in a symbol of timeless elegance that will never go out of style. Lastly, the Cartier box and receipt included with the purchase add an extra layer of satisfaction, making the overall experience feel even more luxurious. Overall, if you're looking for a statement piece that can stand the test of time, the Cartier Juste Un Clou bracelet in 18K white gold is a top contender. 🔗Cartier Juste Un Clou Bracelet, 18K Pink Goldhttps://preview.redd.it/5crm277p6d1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c56c3c8d0d2c251209d4e3fbb75c2bbc52cf4dbd I recently tried the Cartier - Juste Un Clou Bracelet, Medium Model - Bracelet Woman Gold, and it has quickly become one of my favorite pieces of jewelry. The stunning 18K rose gold design stands out as a sophisticated addition to any outfit, seamlessly blending elegance and charm. What truly sets this bracelet apart for me is the unique, distinctly Cartier twist on the iconic "juste un clou" or "just a nail" concept, making it a statement piece that is both timeless and trendy. On the negative side, I did notice that the carat weight, number of stones, and dimensions can vary based on the size you order, which might be a drawback for some buyers who prefer precision in their jewelry purchases. However, this did not dampen my overall enthusiasm for this beautiful bracelet, and I believe anyone who appreciates fine craftsmanship and elegant design would be equally captivated by the Cartier Juste Un Clou Bracelet, Medium Model - Bracelet Woman Gold. Buyer's GuideCartier Nail Bracelets are a symbol of timeless elegance and luxury. With their design inspired by the nail motif, they have become a favorite among fashion enthusiasts and collectors alike. If you're considering purchasing a Cartier Nail Bracelet, this guide will help you understand why these bracelets are so special and provide considerations to keep in mind when making your decision. https://preview.redd.it/ssjry4sp6d1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5b8cef887d506eff1bc0519a70aa5f7832f17ae2 Features and MaterialsCartier Nail Bracelets are crafted from high-quality materials like gold, platinum, and diamonds, ensuring durability and brilliance. They are known for their intricate craftsmanship, including hand-set pavé stones that add extra glamour to each piece. Some variations come with ornate enamel detailing, adding a touch of color and artistry to the bracelet.Styles and VersatilityThe Cartier Nail Bracelet collection offers a range of styles, allowing you to find one that matches your personal taste and wardrobe preferences. 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2024.05.19 12:57 Logical_Act_6927 My boyfriend makes me paranoid and I don’t know what to do
TLDR: My boyfriend is amazing, but has depression which makes him constantly upset and irritated with me, making me extremely paranoid and on edge with everything I say because i’m scared he’ll get upset. He keeps saying he’d change, but goes back to how he was, but he is now seemingly making more of an effort to change by changing his medication and going to therapy. I still feel very paranoid and anxious with him even though he is doing better, but i’m worried that in the process of him getting fully better, he’ll go back to how he was, and I don’t know how much more of it I can take. He is an amazing man and I love him so much, but I’m worried I will always feel on edge when I’m with him. Any advice?
Hi! A little backstory, my boyfriend (19M) suffers from depression, and has always taken medication for it since he was younger. Right before we met, he had taken a gap year to focus on his mental health, and got to a point where he went off his medication because he didn’t like how it made him feel (zombie-like). We first met (we technically already knew each other but that’s besides the point)around 4-5 months before he would’ve started college again, and got together around 2 months into being friends. As school came around, he became really scared that he would have to take another gap semesteyear, because even though getting off his medication helped to an extent, he was still struggling with dealing with his mental health. At the same time, he was worried about getting on medication because he told me that he experiences and adjustment period for the first 6 weeks that causes him to become irritable and agitated very easily and have increased suicidal ideation, but even after the adjustment period, irritability would still be a side effect that he had to deal with and manage.
Eventually, when school started, his mental health did become worse, so he decided to get on medication again, and he did go through an adjustment period. It was a struggle- it was hard seeing him very sad and depressed all the time, and I always tried to help him as best as I could- offering to help him get ready in the morning/drive him to school if he couldn’t get out of bed, helping him with assignments, etc.
At the same time, he definitely became constantly agitated with me. If I didn’t hear him say something and asked him to repeat it (although this was also an issue before he started the medication, but i feel like it got more pronounced), he would basically get very clearly annoyed and quiet, barely talking to me or shutting me down with one word responses. If i didn’t text him for a couple of hours (i have adhd and will sometimes forget to text, which i know is reasonable to be upset about, but he would also do the same thing when playing games with friends), or talked just a bit too much (another adhd symptom, which again i understand can get annoying because i can sometimes go on for VERY long), or if i forget something (an item, memory, or something he told me before), or if we have a recurring joke but for some reason just didn’t like it that day, or if i called him on the phone unprompted (which he does to me too, so i didn’t know that was something i couldn’t do) or if i just say any normal thing but for some reason he just didn’t like it that day, i would be met with irritation, passive aggressiveness, and the silent treatment. I would’ve been slightly more okay with it if it was just a few minutes and then he was back to normal, but he would continue like this for HOURS. If we started talking in the evening, and i said something that slightly annoyed him, it was basically a guarantee that he would be essentially silent for the rest of the night. Not only that, but this happened almost every single day.
I’d like to note that he never expressed his irritation in an angry way, or yelled/said harmful things about me/did anything physical, he would just become very quiet, and anything he did say was very clearly in an irritated voice, as well as passive aggressive remarks.
Eventually, I talked about this with him. When i did, i basically completely forgot that his medication was a reason for a lot of what was happening, so when i talked to him about it, I didn’t mention medication at all. He told me that his medication caused a lot of his agitation and at first accused me of not believing that his medication caused side effects/not taking them seriously, but eventually apologized and said that it wasn’t an excuse and that he’d do better, but also said that sometimes i misinterpreted him as upset when he really wasn’t (which tbh i don’t believe, because sometimes if i pointed something out that he did, he’d say he wasn’t upset or annoyed at all, but a day or two later, tell me he was irritated with me).
He did do better for a bit, but after around a month it basically went to the same way it was before. This went on for a few months, I continued to have conversations with him, he continued to tell me he’d do better, and he would be a bit until he wasn’t. To be fair, after the 6 week adjustment period was over, he still was not doing well at all for about another month, and so he increased his medication dose, which made him have another adjustment period, and he did tell me that his biggest concern was how he’d treat me during that time, so I decided to keep being patient until he got his medication under control.
Fast forward a couple of months, and I was seeing improvements- until about 2 months ago. We saw each other a lot more often; before this time, we’d usually see each other 1-2 times a week and we’d have some sleepovers, but in those two months, i’d stay over at his house for 3-5 days a week. During this time, his irritation got way worse. He definitely valued his independence, but would continuously ask me to stay over, it wasn’t like I urged him to let me stay over. Here are some examples of things that happened:
A few days later, a similar thing happened, but not to that extent. My boyfriend just got his license and offered to pick me up from one of my exams. I told him I wasn’t sure how long the exam would be, and didn’t want to let him know yet because it could’ve taken very long. I was right- it was supposed to be from 12-3, but I ended up starting later end ending around 6:30. I texted him after I finished, but he told me he wished I would’ve let him know earlier because he wasn’t comfortable driving in the dark yet, which is reasonable. He became very quiet and upset again though, and again, anytime I made conversation, he would shut it down and be really upset. I also told him that I had to move out of my dorm, and so he didn’t have to come if he didn’t want to because it would’ve been a lot of things to haul out. He said that it was okay and that he wanted to see me, and so he came over. When he did, he got upset again because we fooled around for an hour or two instead packing everything up (which he initiated), and then as we started pskcking, he became mean and frustrated again. He kept saying that he just didn’t expect to be moving me out, and that he just wanted to pick me up and go home, even though so told him before that that’s what was going to happen. After everything was packed up and we were in the car, he was still silent and upset but a bit less so. I felt really bad and became quiet, and he told me and i quote: “i’m feeling really anxious to drive this car at night, so can you just act normal”, which felt weird for him to say because I was only acting like that because of he as acting mean. I wanted to get home though because it was pretty late, so I just played some music and acted like my normal self, and that made me feel a bit better. When we got home, he apologized again, and thanked me for being patient with him, and that he’d be getting help soon.
After that, he did become a lot nicer to me. There were things I’ve said which I was sure he was going to get upset over, but he just didn’t at all. Usually, even after he’d apologize other times, he would still get a bit upset with me, but it’d only last a few minutes before he became normal again. This time, he wasn’t upset at all even for the things he’d most commonly get upset about (like me not hearing what he said for example). Hes been this way for around 2 weeks, and had not been getting upset at all, and he said he’s getting therapy soon.
The problem now is, especially because of the last two incidents, I still feel extremely anxious and paranoid when I’m with him. I am constantly on edge because I’m worried I’ll say the wrong thing when I’m with him, and it’ll be just like how it has been for the past almost one year.
Looking back at what i just wrote, these instances don’t really seem like that big of a deal, especially compared to how some other people are treated on this subreddit. I think what makes me upset is just how often it happens and how it completely messes up our entire day because he’s just upset the entire time. In the past 3-4 months, I don’t think we’ve ever had a call/hangout where he upset for at least 1-2 hours. I think another thing that really hurts me is that he just acts completely different around me vs anyone else. A lot of the times when I call him, he will get so upset and annoyed so quickly for menial things. He plays games for hours a day, so sometimes when we’re facetime and he wants to play with some friends, he’ll set his camera up so I can watch him play while i do other things, kind of like a youtube video. Whenever we’re on call and he’s upset, and then tells me he wants to play and sets his camera up, his mood instantly changes. His face literally brightens up, and he seems so much happier and talkative. I will sometimes hear his friends on the other end, and they will say/do the exact same things that he gets annoyed at me with, and it just is not a big deal at all, he doesn’t even seem to notice that it happened. Same with my friends- One day, we were planning a trip to the beach, and were supposed to leave around 12 PM. When he came home, he became upset and quiet with me again, and I kept asking him what was wrong and if we’re still going on our trip, but he just ignored me. Finally, at around 6 PM, he was normal again, and then took another hour and a half to get ready, so we ended up leaving at 7:30 PM. My friend was texting me at the same time, so I told my boyfriend to talk to her while I was driving. As we were driving (we were around 15 minutes away at this point), I realized I forgot my license. I asked him if I should turn around, he kept telling me he wasn’t sure, and he was just very upset and annoyed with me, even though judt before we left a whole 7 hours later because he was upset. We drove for an hour before he decided that I should drive back, and I kept apologizing for forgetting my license, and that we could try again tomorrow morning. His mom told us we could go to dinner or something to make up for the day, and I asked him if he wanted to do that, and he just said “why would we do that what would we even eat” in a harsh tone. Again, I tried to keep it light, telling him that I was sorry and we could start fresh tomorrow, and he said that he didn’t want to go to the beach anymore in an upset tone. Again, for half of the night after we came home, he was upset and irritated with me. Later that night, I looked back at. the texts between my friend and boyfriend, and I was in shock with just how different he was acting with me in real life vs how he was acting with her. As he was upset with me, he was texting her with updates, making jokes, and basically just making it seem like it wasn’t a big deal at all that I didn’t have my license. In real life, he acted like I was so stupid for forgetting it, and that it was the worst thing I could’ve possibly done.
I feel like most people who read this might just think he values his independence, and that aim too clingy. I too thought that maybe I just wasn’t giving him his space, especially because I’m his first girlfriend. I will not offer to call/come over as much just to see if I’m the one asking too often and he feels too bad to say no, but when I don’t, he will keep asking me to call him and come over, and ask why I haven’t been talking to him as much/initiates calls or hangouts. He’ll tell me to call more often and hang out with him more often as well. If we hang out, I’ll tell him that I’ll go home for the night and don’t plan on sleeping over, and he’ll keep asking me if I could sleep over or when I could sleep over, and continue to make plans.
Despite what I’ve said, my boyfriend is genuinely the most amazing guy anyone could ever meet. He’s sweet, kind, and thoughtful with genuinely everyone- his parents, my friends, his friends, his professors, everyone. He is an amazing tipper, he goes out of his way to do things for my friends, and anytime i mention the slightest thing he’ll go out of his way to do it for me. For example, in the first month we met, he noticed my backpack and headphones were completely broken, so he bought me a new ones without me saying absolutely anything to him. When I drove him places, he saw that it was difficult for me to look at my phone to follow GPS directions, so he randomly bought me a car phone holder. On my birthday, he made me a card out of the acknowledgement page of the first book we read together, crossed out the authors name, and put my name, and wrote a bunch of sweet, adorable things about me. Because of my adhd, I would constantly forget to chargemy phone/laptop or bring my chargers, and would constantly have no charge on both, so he bought me a pack with 10 of each type of charger, as well as a portable charger. I offhandedly mentioned that I get really carsick, so he bought me dramamine and those carsickness goggles. He bought pads to keep with him just in case I need some, and always carries pepto and advil around because i get headaches a lot and have lots of stomachaches. He helped me move into my dorm, and bought me so many food and supplies even when I insisted that he didn’t. Whenever we go out with my friends, he always covers everything. For my friend’s birthday, everyone was going to chip in to buy her airpods, but he told them he’d cover their part and essentially just bought them for her. He is an insanely hard worker, and I am so proud of him for everything that he’s been through, and he is also just the most fun person to be around. I love him so so much, and I know that a lot of the way he’s acted is because of his depression, and I know that that’s not really him. I visited him yesterday and we had a really good time, but the entire time I kept being really careful with what I said because I was scared of him becoming upset. I’m scared that this anxiety I feel around him will last forever. I want to wait until he has everything under control, but if he becomes the same way that he was before again, I don’t know how much of it I can take. I don’t know what to do or where to go from here- can anyone help me?
submitted by Logical_Act_6927 to Advice [link] [comments]
Hi! A little backstory, my boyfriend (19M) suffers from depression, and has always taken medication for it since he was younger. Right before we met, he had taken a gap year to focus on his mental health, and got to a point where he went off his medication because he didn’t like how it made him feel (zombie-like). We first met (we technically already knew each other but that’s besides the point)around 4-5 months before he would’ve started college again, and got together around 2 months into being friends. As school came around, he became really scared that he would have to take another gap semesteyear, because even though getting off his medication helped to an extent, he was still struggling with dealing with his mental health. At the same time, he was worried about getting on medication because he told me that he experiences and adjustment period for the first 6 weeks that causes him to become irritable and agitated very easily and have increased suicidal ideation, but even after the adjustment period, irritability would still be a side effect that he had to deal with and manage.
Eventually, when school started, his mental health did become worse, so he decided to get on medication again, and he did go through an adjustment period. It was a struggle- it was hard seeing him very sad and depressed all the time, and I always tried to help him as best as I could- offering to help him get ready in the morning/drive him to school if he couldn’t get out of bed, helping him with assignments, etc.
At the same time, he definitely became constantly agitated with me. If I didn’t hear him say something and asked him to repeat it (although this was also an issue before he started the medication, but i feel like it got more pronounced), he would basically get very clearly annoyed and quiet, barely talking to me or shutting me down with one word responses. If i didn’t text him for a couple of hours (i have adhd and will sometimes forget to text, which i know is reasonable to be upset about, but he would also do the same thing when playing games with friends), or talked just a bit too much (another adhd symptom, which again i understand can get annoying because i can sometimes go on for VERY long), or if i forget something (an item, memory, or something he told me before), or if we have a recurring joke but for some reason just didn’t like it that day, or if i called him on the phone unprompted (which he does to me too, so i didn’t know that was something i couldn’t do) or if i just say any normal thing but for some reason he just didn’t like it that day, i would be met with irritation, passive aggressiveness, and the silent treatment. I would’ve been slightly more okay with it if it was just a few minutes and then he was back to normal, but he would continue like this for HOURS. If we started talking in the evening, and i said something that slightly annoyed him, it was basically a guarantee that he would be essentially silent for the rest of the night. Not only that, but this happened almost every single day.
I’d like to note that he never expressed his irritation in an angry way, or yelled/said harmful things about me/did anything physical, he would just become very quiet, and anything he did say was very clearly in an irritated voice, as well as passive aggressive remarks.
Eventually, I talked about this with him. When i did, i basically completely forgot that his medication was a reason for a lot of what was happening, so when i talked to him about it, I didn’t mention medication at all. He told me that his medication caused a lot of his agitation and at first accused me of not believing that his medication caused side effects/not taking them seriously, but eventually apologized and said that it wasn’t an excuse and that he’d do better, but also said that sometimes i misinterpreted him as upset when he really wasn’t (which tbh i don’t believe, because sometimes if i pointed something out that he did, he’d say he wasn’t upset or annoyed at all, but a day or two later, tell me he was irritated with me).
He did do better for a bit, but after around a month it basically went to the same way it was before. This went on for a few months, I continued to have conversations with him, he continued to tell me he’d do better, and he would be a bit until he wasn’t. To be fair, after the 6 week adjustment period was over, he still was not doing well at all for about another month, and so he increased his medication dose, which made him have another adjustment period, and he did tell me that his biggest concern was how he’d treat me during that time, so I decided to keep being patient until he got his medication under control.
Fast forward a couple of months, and I was seeing improvements- until about 2 months ago. We saw each other a lot more often; before this time, we’d usually see each other 1-2 times a week and we’d have some sleepovers, but in those two months, i’d stay over at his house for 3-5 days a week. During this time, his irritation got way worse. He definitely valued his independence, but would continuously ask me to stay over, it wasn’t like I urged him to let me stay over. Here are some examples of things that happened:
- before i came over, he told me how he didn’t want to think about making food because he was stressed over schoolwork. I asked him if I could make him something, he told me yes, so I made pizza while he showered. I’ve made pizza several times before, he made it once with me(also, i’ve cooked for years while he only started occasionally baking things when we got together since i liked to cook/bake), and when he came down, he saw the pizza dough was slightly stickier than it looked when he made it with me. He got annoyed and kept asking what I did wrong, and that from now on, i should only cook when he was with me to make sure I don’t mess it up, and then basically became extremely quiet for the next 15-30 minutes. I think he realized he sounded super weird saying this, and tried to turn it into a joke after those 30 minuted, but it made me feel really bad in the moment becsude I only wanted to do something nice for him. By the way, the pizza turned out great- my friend came over to eat with us and told us it was one of the best pizzas she’s ever had.
- These next few are connected: The next day, he was at school, and I happened to not have school that day so I stayed at his house while he was there to rest because I had a really bad headache. Again, the past few days he told me how stressed he was about school, so I wanted to surprise him. I cleaned his room, made pizza sauce for pizza since we had extra dough (he really likes the pizza), and made him cookies because he told me he was craving them a few days before. He took an uber to school (he couldn’t drive yet at this point), and so I also offered to pick him up.
* The first thing that happened was he has a mildly confusing alarm system I had to disable before going outside to get to the car. If i didn’t do the steps correctly, the alarm would sound. Basically, I had to disable the alarm, go through the garage door and close it fully, press the button to open the garage, go back inside and press another button tot turn the alarm back on, and go out the garage door while it’s beeping and fully close the door again to stop the beeping. He told me these directions and I followed them, and the beeping continue to happen even after I closed the door. i texted him that I was walking out the garage but there was still beeping, he told me it was okay, but then the alarm went off. I think he thought that I didn’t close the garage door yet, which is why he thought it was okay? But apparently I didn’t wait for him to fully give him instructions (which I was genuinely confused about bc even looking back at the texts now he did), and he got extremely frustrated with me, telling me that because I didn’t properly follow directions, it was now going to call his parents. He kept saying that it was whatever, and that he’d just take an uber, but I apologized profusely and kept telling him that I’d do it right. He texted his mom, and apparently he told me to press the wrong button, and that i need to press a different one instead after going back in through the garage door. In the moment, he kept saying that the other button was still right and always works for him, but later he admitted that he was probably wrong about it. * The second thing that happened isn’t really a big deal, but i’ll still include it. My boyfriend also has anxiety, and is a very big backseat driver. However, backseat driving makes me extremely paranoid and be a worse driver, so it’s just a never ending cycle. I would be following the directions on the GPS, and he would keep telling me the directions as if I can’t see them myself. For example, if i’m about to turn right, he’d would keep repeating “turn right over here” a bunch of times, each one more with more urgency, as if it isn’t what I was already doing. He will pick apart everything I do, and tell me not to talk too much or turn the music up too loud because it would distract me. Again, to be fair, because of my ADHD, I do get distracted easily, even on the road, but it’s usually pretty manageable, and I’m able to talk on the phone/listen to music when driving when I’m by myself. The problem is with him, I get paranoid over what i’m doing, so I get distracted, and I guess that makes it seem like the music/talking is what’s distracting me. Again, when he backseat drives, he also gets extremely agitated/quiet, and he basically continued on like that for the next few hours. * Lastly, when we got home, he was irritated over everything I did. I did leave a bit later than I told him I would because of the things I was preparing (i think i left at 3:15 instead of 3), but I told him beforehand, and he told me to take my time and come anytime I wanted to since I was going out of my way to drive him(be told me this right when I offered to drive him and after I told him i’d be a bit late). When we got home, I told him about what i made and that I cleaned his room, but he got upset because I made the pizza sauce/cookies because he wanted us to do it together. I told him that I would’ve loved to make them together, but just wanted to surprise him because he told me he had a lot of work to do and told me he was craving cookies earlier. He said that he didn’t have as much work anymore, and told me that he thought I knew that because he told me the assignments he need to do (i did know that most of the deadlines were for that day and the day before, but he told me he had some deadlines for a few days after and had told me his whole week was busy, but I guess to him I should’ve know that most of his pressing work would’ve been done that day). He was upset with me again for another few hours, and I tried to tell him there were things we could still do together like assemble the pizza, make something the next day, etc, but he wasn’t having it. Eventually a few hours later he got over it and told me he appreciated that I made him those things, and he was disappointed that we couldn’t do it together, and then mentioned that he was grateful that I cleaned up for him (he didn’t mention it before).Several other things happened, but I think that’s enough to somewhat get the picture. The biggest thing that happened though was just a couple of weeks ago. We hadn’t seen each other in maybe 2-3 weeks, and so I was really excited to get to see him. He had an exam that day, so I offered to drive him, and he again said that he didn’t want to worry about making food. The day before he told me he was craving pizza, so yet again I said i’d make it before i came over (starting to think pizza and me driving is cursed). I asked him before if it was okay that I made him pizza, and he said yes, and so we agreed that I would get to his house around 2 (it was maybe 10 am at the time). I bought supplies and started making the pizza. after a while though, I guess he changed his mind about me making the pizza because it took a while. Around 1, I could tell he was getting annoyed. He kept saying that the pizza wasn’t important enough bc i could’ve been at his house already. I finished making the pizza and got to his house pretty early, maybe 5-10 minutes before 2. After that, I was still waiting in the car for another 30 minutes because he was still getting ready, and he got to my car around 2:30. He was still very upset and annoyed with me and gave me the silent treatment. I tried to keep the mood light, but again, he just didn’t say anything. When we were driving, I asked him if he wanted to play music, and what song I should play, but just… complete silence, not even a nod or head shake or anything. For the entire ride he was just on his phone, texting a few friends, and I started to silently cry because I felt so unappreciated. When we got to his campus, he went to a reserved room, but I had to stay in the car because i have a tutoring job that’s online, and had a session at the same time we parked. The person I was supposed to tutor wasn’t there for the session, which was lucky for me because right when my boyfriend left, I started sobbing. When I got out of the car I was still crying as I was walking across the street, and decided to call my friend to take my mind off of everything. Her girlfriend also went to the same college as my boyfriend, and I didn’t know exactly where I was supposed to go, so I called her to help me find where I needed to go. Since we were calling, I didn’t see some texts my boyfriend sent me, but I finally found the room. I was a bit cheered up from my friend but still sad, but wanted to act happy and normal in case he was just randomly in a bad mood and just needed a distraction. When I came in, I was happy to see him and made some jokes, but all he said was “why didn’t you text me” in the most monotone, upset voice. I told him that I was sorry and forgot, would do better next time, and was going to explain that I was on the phone so i didn’t see his texts, but he interrupted me and said something like “i don’t care about you telling me you’re going to do better, just actually do it” in the meanest, irritated tone. It doesn’t seem like a big deal at all, but he has never retorted at me like that before, especially in the way he did. That was my final straw, and I just completely broke down and started crying. He kept asking me to talk to him and tell me what I was thinking, which only made it worse because it was pretty clear as to why I was crying. He comforted me, apologized, and then had to leave for his exam. For the next 4 hours he was in his exam, I was just crying nonstop. When he came back, I was still crying, and he kept apologizing and asked if I was going to break up with him. I told him I wasn’t, and then told him that this happened so often and I felt like no matter what I did, there was something I was doing wrong, and that I felt unloveable. He again apologized a lot and told me he loved me, and later told me that he really wanted to change his medication and get therapy.
A few days later, a similar thing happened, but not to that extent. My boyfriend just got his license and offered to pick me up from one of my exams. I told him I wasn’t sure how long the exam would be, and didn’t want to let him know yet because it could’ve taken very long. I was right- it was supposed to be from 12-3, but I ended up starting later end ending around 6:30. I texted him after I finished, but he told me he wished I would’ve let him know earlier because he wasn’t comfortable driving in the dark yet, which is reasonable. He became very quiet and upset again though, and again, anytime I made conversation, he would shut it down and be really upset. I also told him that I had to move out of my dorm, and so he didn’t have to come if he didn’t want to because it would’ve been a lot of things to haul out. He said that it was okay and that he wanted to see me, and so he came over. When he did, he got upset again because we fooled around for an hour or two instead packing everything up (which he initiated), and then as we started pskcking, he became mean and frustrated again. He kept saying that he just didn’t expect to be moving me out, and that he just wanted to pick me up and go home, even though so told him before that that’s what was going to happen. After everything was packed up and we were in the car, he was still silent and upset but a bit less so. I felt really bad and became quiet, and he told me and i quote: “i’m feeling really anxious to drive this car at night, so can you just act normal”, which felt weird for him to say because I was only acting like that because of he as acting mean. I wanted to get home though because it was pretty late, so I just played some music and acted like my normal self, and that made me feel a bit better. When we got home, he apologized again, and thanked me for being patient with him, and that he’d be getting help soon.
After that, he did become a lot nicer to me. There were things I’ve said which I was sure he was going to get upset over, but he just didn’t at all. Usually, even after he’d apologize other times, he would still get a bit upset with me, but it’d only last a few minutes before he became normal again. This time, he wasn’t upset at all even for the things he’d most commonly get upset about (like me not hearing what he said for example). Hes been this way for around 2 weeks, and had not been getting upset at all, and he said he’s getting therapy soon.
The problem now is, especially because of the last two incidents, I still feel extremely anxious and paranoid when I’m with him. I am constantly on edge because I’m worried I’ll say the wrong thing when I’m with him, and it’ll be just like how it has been for the past almost one year.
Looking back at what i just wrote, these instances don’t really seem like that big of a deal, especially compared to how some other people are treated on this subreddit. I think what makes me upset is just how often it happens and how it completely messes up our entire day because he’s just upset the entire time. In the past 3-4 months, I don’t think we’ve ever had a call/hangout where he upset for at least 1-2 hours. I think another thing that really hurts me is that he just acts completely different around me vs anyone else. A lot of the times when I call him, he will get so upset and annoyed so quickly for menial things. He plays games for hours a day, so sometimes when we’re facetime and he wants to play with some friends, he’ll set his camera up so I can watch him play while i do other things, kind of like a youtube video. Whenever we’re on call and he’s upset, and then tells me he wants to play and sets his camera up, his mood instantly changes. His face literally brightens up, and he seems so much happier and talkative. I will sometimes hear his friends on the other end, and they will say/do the exact same things that he gets annoyed at me with, and it just is not a big deal at all, he doesn’t even seem to notice that it happened. Same with my friends- One day, we were planning a trip to the beach, and were supposed to leave around 12 PM. When he came home, he became upset and quiet with me again, and I kept asking him what was wrong and if we’re still going on our trip, but he just ignored me. Finally, at around 6 PM, he was normal again, and then took another hour and a half to get ready, so we ended up leaving at 7:30 PM. My friend was texting me at the same time, so I told my boyfriend to talk to her while I was driving. As we were driving (we were around 15 minutes away at this point), I realized I forgot my license. I asked him if I should turn around, he kept telling me he wasn’t sure, and he was just very upset and annoyed with me, even though judt before we left a whole 7 hours later because he was upset. We drove for an hour before he decided that I should drive back, and I kept apologizing for forgetting my license, and that we could try again tomorrow morning. His mom told us we could go to dinner or something to make up for the day, and I asked him if he wanted to do that, and he just said “why would we do that what would we even eat” in a harsh tone. Again, I tried to keep it light, telling him that I was sorry and we could start fresh tomorrow, and he said that he didn’t want to go to the beach anymore in an upset tone. Again, for half of the night after we came home, he was upset and irritated with me. Later that night, I looked back at. the texts between my friend and boyfriend, and I was in shock with just how different he was acting with me in real life vs how he was acting with her. As he was upset with me, he was texting her with updates, making jokes, and basically just making it seem like it wasn’t a big deal at all that I didn’t have my license. In real life, he acted like I was so stupid for forgetting it, and that it was the worst thing I could’ve possibly done.
I feel like most people who read this might just think he values his independence, and that aim too clingy. I too thought that maybe I just wasn’t giving him his space, especially because I’m his first girlfriend. I will not offer to call/come over as much just to see if I’m the one asking too often and he feels too bad to say no, but when I don’t, he will keep asking me to call him and come over, and ask why I haven’t been talking to him as much/initiates calls or hangouts. He’ll tell me to call more often and hang out with him more often as well. If we hang out, I’ll tell him that I’ll go home for the night and don’t plan on sleeping over, and he’ll keep asking me if I could sleep over or when I could sleep over, and continue to make plans.
Despite what I’ve said, my boyfriend is genuinely the most amazing guy anyone could ever meet. He’s sweet, kind, and thoughtful with genuinely everyone- his parents, my friends, his friends, his professors, everyone. He is an amazing tipper, he goes out of his way to do things for my friends, and anytime i mention the slightest thing he’ll go out of his way to do it for me. For example, in the first month we met, he noticed my backpack and headphones were completely broken, so he bought me a new ones without me saying absolutely anything to him. When I drove him places, he saw that it was difficult for me to look at my phone to follow GPS directions, so he randomly bought me a car phone holder. On my birthday, he made me a card out of the acknowledgement page of the first book we read together, crossed out the authors name, and put my name, and wrote a bunch of sweet, adorable things about me. Because of my adhd, I would constantly forget to chargemy phone/laptop or bring my chargers, and would constantly have no charge on both, so he bought me a pack with 10 of each type of charger, as well as a portable charger. I offhandedly mentioned that I get really carsick, so he bought me dramamine and those carsickness goggles. He bought pads to keep with him just in case I need some, and always carries pepto and advil around because i get headaches a lot and have lots of stomachaches. He helped me move into my dorm, and bought me so many food and supplies even when I insisted that he didn’t. Whenever we go out with my friends, he always covers everything. For my friend’s birthday, everyone was going to chip in to buy her airpods, but he told them he’d cover their part and essentially just bought them for her. He is an insanely hard worker, and I am so proud of him for everything that he’s been through, and he is also just the most fun person to be around. I love him so so much, and I know that a lot of the way he’s acted is because of his depression, and I know that that’s not really him. I visited him yesterday and we had a really good time, but the entire time I kept being really careful with what I said because I was scared of him becoming upset. I’m scared that this anxiety I feel around him will last forever. I want to wait until he has everything under control, but if he becomes the same way that he was before again, I don’t know how much of it I can take. I don’t know what to do or where to go from here- can anyone help me?
2024.05.19 12:55 Upstairs_Bid4092 Interesting quote from Luke Newton on Episodes 7&8
DEADLINE: I am really looking forward to those last few episodes.
NEWTON: There’s so much that happens in seven and eight.I was like, ‘There’s no way that that fits into two hours.’ But the pace of the show is so quick this season, I guess because we haven’t had to establish the show or introduce new families or characters as much as previous seasons. So we really get to hit the ground running. I feel like it’s just jam packed with so much story. Hopefully that continues, and it sets up future seasons. I think it’s just been so brilliantly done this year.
https://deadline.com/2024/05/bridgerton-luke-newton-interview-polin-carriage-scene-season-3-part-2-teaser-netflix-1235921237/amp/
So my takeaway from this is we definitely aren't seeing Sophie because she would be brand new.
Phillip isn't a new character so I think there is a better chance we see him.
But his "it sets up FUTURE seasons" definitely makes me think we're going to at minimum see all 3 od these in the finale :
a letter from Phillip about Marina, a mention of a masquerade and a John/Fran wedding.
submitted by Upstairs_Bid4092 to PhiloiseBridgerton [link] [comments]
NEWTON: There’s so much that happens in seven and eight.I was like, ‘There’s no way that that fits into two hours.’ But the pace of the show is so quick this season, I guess because we haven’t had to establish the show or introduce new families or characters as much as previous seasons. So we really get to hit the ground running. I feel like it’s just jam packed with so much story. Hopefully that continues, and it sets up future seasons. I think it’s just been so brilliantly done this year.
https://deadline.com/2024/05/bridgerton-luke-newton-interview-polin-carriage-scene-season-3-part-2-teaser-netflix-1235921237/amp/
So my takeaway from this is we definitely aren't seeing Sophie because she would be brand new.
Phillip isn't a new character so I think there is a better chance we see him.
But his "it sets up FUTURE seasons" definitely makes me think we're going to at minimum see all 3 od these in the finale :
a letter from Phillip about Marina, a mention of a masquerade and a John/Fran wedding.
2024.05.19 12:18 CuriousAnachronism 24 [M4M] Germany/Europe/Online - Fiat iustitia, et pereat mundus
Prologue
Hello and welcome to my post. I will subdivide this into two large parts. One will cover my thoughts, feelings, my hopes and dreams...While the other will tell you the specifics of how I pass the time, what topics interest me, what passions do I posses. I believe that at the end of this leap into my inner world, you dear reader, will have all the necessary information to judge whether we are compatible or not.
Part I
I am writing this in the hopes of finding something that I lack. Lately I have had this feeling, this tinge of melancholy within the dephts of my being, this yearning to find a kindred spirit, another Soul, much like mine, to form a bond with. Perhaps Loneliness is the right word for what is bothering me, but to use it seems to carry with it a connotation of ungratefulness. Ungratefulness for the people that I do have in my life, although none of them, of course, have the connection to me that I seek here.
I have found it increasingly necessary to seek in this Life a sort of purity of thought. What I mean is, I have began to undestand what ideas and concepts are ultimately compatible with my inner most Self, ergo what guidelines I have to follow to feel the most whole. Naturally I have likewise realised what I cannot add to my Self and what I will henceforth reject with all the power that I posses.
With this new context in mind, I now follow on the path of self improvement. I will now begin to mold my Self into my perfected idea of how the Self should be. This is certainly a significant undertaking, one that will not be easy to follow through on but one that I ultimately have to do. To me such context is essential. It is akin to a Guiding Star shining in the night. I will follow this Star for without it I am lost in the vast Darkness.
Looking back at my life, it was suboptimal, especially if one compares the way it molded me to how I will now mold myself. I suppose I must look on with a hint of regret at all that time which one might consider to be lost. Still... I try to stave off such decisively negative interpretations, after all, I have ultimately came to these conclusions. That means that somewhere along the line I had to have picked up on enough of such ideas for them to become so cemented in my consciousness. Well, either that or I was always like this, but in that case I can at least thank my life up to this point for not being able to supress such manifestations of my inner most Self.
To add to the topic of my life, I must admit that not all the battles have yet been won, not all the Demons vanquished, not every Mountain climbed. I want you to keep such things in mind when deciding whether or not to approach me. Many will shy away, I undestand that much, but the pursuit of true Companionship is just another such battle. Having said all that I do believe that being able to overcome hurdles together carries with it a certain appeal. That is to say, what's the fun in joining once the Game is already over?
I don't shy away from such challenges, perhaps to a fault. Certain troubles that I faced in the past carry with them a long shadow over my current health and well being. Still, I intend to change little in this regard other than the proficiency with which I will clash the current of my Will against the cliffs of Life.
Part II
In this part of my post I will tell you about my interests and hobbies, I will try to be thorough, commonality in this regard is rather important to build a relationship
History. I have had an interest in history for almost a decade now, it started back in school and developed from there. Well, now that I think about it one could argue that it started even earlier in my life as I liked watching the odd historic documentary or film aired on television but it wasn't regular back then, I never actively sought it out. I am mostly interested in European history in the period between the 18th-20th century but I sometimes branch out to other time periods and other parts of the world. I watch various channels related to history and read articles and sometimes books. I have recently got a few books on the German revolution of 1848/1849 and a historical magazine on the Thirty Years' War. Besides that I try to visit museums sometimes.
Literature. Especially old novels. I like to immerse myself in the Worlds of these books, I tend to read them while listening to thematically fitting music and take my time with them. One time you are following a troubled Youth in his quest for spiritual understanding of the world, another you see the aged and decrepit Doctor gambling his very Soul on the promises of abtaining satisfaction in earthy pleasures, then again your olfaction notices the most pleasant scent known to man even as the one eminating it has the appearance of a revolting Frog. These and many other stories open up to you once you decide to set foot into the literary World.
Languages. I know three, with one being a bit rusty. I am currently working intently on strengthening it. I believe that if I continue to apply myself in this regard then I should be able to finally conquer it. What language am I working on? Well, if you were to stack all the major works in it they would be as tall as a house... It is fun to go through different works in multiple languages, the same goes for film, games and such.
Games. I recently played Cyberpunk 2077. Well as recently as I played any major story centric game. Now that the dust has settled and the bugs mostly removed...It's not that bad. The main questline at least. Besides that I tried Fallout 76 (Very average, I'm dissapointed with what they made the "RPG" system) and I might give Deus Ex Manking Divided another spin (since it's somewhat similar to Cyberpunk when it comes to its aesthetics). Dark Souls is one of my favorite series, I still haven't beaten Elden Ring though. When it came out I wasn't in the right mindset to invest a hundred hours into it, with all those bosses and difficult locations. I think I'll only consider playing it if I am streaming it to someone. I am generally interested in either streaming games or having the person I am talking to stream them to me. To be specific I mean streaming to a single person while being on call. Besides that I'm a big fan of Paradox strategy games, especially Europa Universalis IV and Heats of Iron IV, I tend to only play single player since I find multiplayer with many people to be rather stressful but on the other hand I have nothing against a co-op game. I'm not the best player though, despite the ammount of hours I have in them. Another great game I would mention would be Dragon's Dogma. A very underrated RPG. I recently beat it again and it was an atmospheric and interesting experience. It is one of those games that feel like they have an endless ammount of depth and constant new secrets to discover.
Anime and Manga. In recent times my interest in them has waned but I still watch the occasional series here and there. Like Cyberpunk Edgerunners (Which I found to be rather mediocre) and the very good first season from the new arc of Bleach. Some of my favourite series include: Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood, Death Note, Fate;Zero, Psycho Pass, Code Geass and Attack on Titan. I wouldn't mind if you were to introduce me to some new series, maybe based on the ones I mentioned. My favourite Manga is Berserk which I still follow, althought I am still not certain on the direction that the new author is taking. I suppose it really is a matter of contention whether a somewhat (or considerably warped) vision is better than an unfinished work. One could argue that a few novels remain unfinished and possess a macabre appeal to them as such.
Music. Classical music has a very special place in my heart. A few of my favourite pieces would be: Clair de Lune, Nocturne Op. 9 No.2, Devil's Trill Sonata, Danse Macabre, Valse Sentimentale, Symphony No. 7 in A Major, Op. 92: II. Alegreto (by Beethoven) and Suite from Swan Lake, Op. 20a: I. Scene. Moderato. There are more but these ones always invoke something in me when I listen to them. Besides Classical I also enjoy listening to Synthwave, old Western pop and J-pop, both modern and from the 20th century.
Esotericism. I am interested in things spiritual, mystical, magical and esoteric. I have read religios texts, magical grimoires, introductions to various schools of thought. It is interesting to me.
Epilogue
Hopefully I was able to cast the spotlight upon my inner World in a clear and unequivocal manner. I feel the need to add to the aforementioned that I am rather introverted, which means that I tend to dislike large social gatherings. I managed to condition myself to be able to endure the presense of large groups of people but it isn't something that I would seek out in most cases. Besides that I am neurodivergent and suffer from certain issues with mental health. I have to take medication to keep myself under control. They work well enough but certain days are harder than others. I respect the struggle that others have with mental health but in the context of a relationship I have my limits, no one with BDP for instance. I am also not looking for anything casual. I understand than one cannot demand depth and meaning from a conversation with an absolute stranger, that is akin to trying to build a sand castle right before the waves strike but I ask at least that you enter with a mindset that this might become something of significance. I also do want to say that I am completely Monogamous. My preference? The sickly, pale, intellectual who watches rain droplets slide down the window in Autumn. Lastly, if I enjoy the company of a person I tend to not want to let them go.
Thank you for taking the time to read my post and have a good day. I ask that you send a DM instead of a chat and that you give the English translation of my title as your own.
Goodbye...Or perhaps untill we meet again
submitted by CuriousAnachronism to ForeverAloneDating [link] [comments]
Hello and welcome to my post. I will subdivide this into two large parts. One will cover my thoughts, feelings, my hopes and dreams...While the other will tell you the specifics of how I pass the time, what topics interest me, what passions do I posses. I believe that at the end of this leap into my inner world, you dear reader, will have all the necessary information to judge whether we are compatible or not.
Part I
I am writing this in the hopes of finding something that I lack. Lately I have had this feeling, this tinge of melancholy within the dephts of my being, this yearning to find a kindred spirit, another Soul, much like mine, to form a bond with. Perhaps Loneliness is the right word for what is bothering me, but to use it seems to carry with it a connotation of ungratefulness. Ungratefulness for the people that I do have in my life, although none of them, of course, have the connection to me that I seek here.
I have found it increasingly necessary to seek in this Life a sort of purity of thought. What I mean is, I have began to undestand what ideas and concepts are ultimately compatible with my inner most Self, ergo what guidelines I have to follow to feel the most whole. Naturally I have likewise realised what I cannot add to my Self and what I will henceforth reject with all the power that I posses.
With this new context in mind, I now follow on the path of self improvement. I will now begin to mold my Self into my perfected idea of how the Self should be. This is certainly a significant undertaking, one that will not be easy to follow through on but one that I ultimately have to do. To me such context is essential. It is akin to a Guiding Star shining in the night. I will follow this Star for without it I am lost in the vast Darkness.
Looking back at my life, it was suboptimal, especially if one compares the way it molded me to how I will now mold myself. I suppose I must look on with a hint of regret at all that time which one might consider to be lost. Still... I try to stave off such decisively negative interpretations, after all, I have ultimately came to these conclusions. That means that somewhere along the line I had to have picked up on enough of such ideas for them to become so cemented in my consciousness. Well, either that or I was always like this, but in that case I can at least thank my life up to this point for not being able to supress such manifestations of my inner most Self.
To add to the topic of my life, I must admit that not all the battles have yet been won, not all the Demons vanquished, not every Mountain climbed. I want you to keep such things in mind when deciding whether or not to approach me. Many will shy away, I undestand that much, but the pursuit of true Companionship is just another such battle. Having said all that I do believe that being able to overcome hurdles together carries with it a certain appeal. That is to say, what's the fun in joining once the Game is already over?
I don't shy away from such challenges, perhaps to a fault. Certain troubles that I faced in the past carry with them a long shadow over my current health and well being. Still, I intend to change little in this regard other than the proficiency with which I will clash the current of my Will against the cliffs of Life.
Part II
In this part of my post I will tell you about my interests and hobbies, I will try to be thorough, commonality in this regard is rather important to build a relationship
History. I have had an interest in history for almost a decade now, it started back in school and developed from there. Well, now that I think about it one could argue that it started even earlier in my life as I liked watching the odd historic documentary or film aired on television but it wasn't regular back then, I never actively sought it out. I am mostly interested in European history in the period between the 18th-20th century but I sometimes branch out to other time periods and other parts of the world. I watch various channels related to history and read articles and sometimes books. I have recently got a few books on the German revolution of 1848/1849 and a historical magazine on the Thirty Years' War. Besides that I try to visit museums sometimes.
Literature. Especially old novels. I like to immerse myself in the Worlds of these books, I tend to read them while listening to thematically fitting music and take my time with them. One time you are following a troubled Youth in his quest for spiritual understanding of the world, another you see the aged and decrepit Doctor gambling his very Soul on the promises of abtaining satisfaction in earthy pleasures, then again your olfaction notices the most pleasant scent known to man even as the one eminating it has the appearance of a revolting Frog. These and many other stories open up to you once you decide to set foot into the literary World.
Languages. I know three, with one being a bit rusty. I am currently working intently on strengthening it. I believe that if I continue to apply myself in this regard then I should be able to finally conquer it. What language am I working on? Well, if you were to stack all the major works in it they would be as tall as a house... It is fun to go through different works in multiple languages, the same goes for film, games and such.
Games. I recently played Cyberpunk 2077. Well as recently as I played any major story centric game. Now that the dust has settled and the bugs mostly removed...It's not that bad. The main questline at least. Besides that I tried Fallout 76 (Very average, I'm dissapointed with what they made the "RPG" system) and I might give Deus Ex Manking Divided another spin (since it's somewhat similar to Cyberpunk when it comes to its aesthetics). Dark Souls is one of my favorite series, I still haven't beaten Elden Ring though. When it came out I wasn't in the right mindset to invest a hundred hours into it, with all those bosses and difficult locations. I think I'll only consider playing it if I am streaming it to someone. I am generally interested in either streaming games or having the person I am talking to stream them to me. To be specific I mean streaming to a single person while being on call. Besides that I'm a big fan of Paradox strategy games, especially Europa Universalis IV and Heats of Iron IV, I tend to only play single player since I find multiplayer with many people to be rather stressful but on the other hand I have nothing against a co-op game. I'm not the best player though, despite the ammount of hours I have in them. Another great game I would mention would be Dragon's Dogma. A very underrated RPG. I recently beat it again and it was an atmospheric and interesting experience. It is one of those games that feel like they have an endless ammount of depth and constant new secrets to discover.
Anime and Manga. In recent times my interest in them has waned but I still watch the occasional series here and there. Like Cyberpunk Edgerunners (Which I found to be rather mediocre) and the very good first season from the new arc of Bleach. Some of my favourite series include: Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood, Death Note, Fate;Zero, Psycho Pass, Code Geass and Attack on Titan. I wouldn't mind if you were to introduce me to some new series, maybe based on the ones I mentioned. My favourite Manga is Berserk which I still follow, althought I am still not certain on the direction that the new author is taking. I suppose it really is a matter of contention whether a somewhat (or considerably warped) vision is better than an unfinished work. One could argue that a few novels remain unfinished and possess a macabre appeal to them as such.
Music. Classical music has a very special place in my heart. A few of my favourite pieces would be: Clair de Lune, Nocturne Op. 9 No.2, Devil's Trill Sonata, Danse Macabre, Valse Sentimentale, Symphony No. 7 in A Major, Op. 92: II. Alegreto (by Beethoven) and Suite from Swan Lake, Op. 20a: I. Scene. Moderato. There are more but these ones always invoke something in me when I listen to them. Besides Classical I also enjoy listening to Synthwave, old Western pop and J-pop, both modern and from the 20th century.
Esotericism. I am interested in things spiritual, mystical, magical and esoteric. I have read religios texts, magical grimoires, introductions to various schools of thought. It is interesting to me.
Epilogue
Hopefully I was able to cast the spotlight upon my inner World in a clear and unequivocal manner. I feel the need to add to the aforementioned that I am rather introverted, which means that I tend to dislike large social gatherings. I managed to condition myself to be able to endure the presense of large groups of people but it isn't something that I would seek out in most cases. Besides that I am neurodivergent and suffer from certain issues with mental health. I have to take medication to keep myself under control. They work well enough but certain days are harder than others. I respect the struggle that others have with mental health but in the context of a relationship I have my limits, no one with BDP for instance. I am also not looking for anything casual. I understand than one cannot demand depth and meaning from a conversation with an absolute stranger, that is akin to trying to build a sand castle right before the waves strike but I ask at least that you enter with a mindset that this might become something of significance. I also do want to say that I am completely Monogamous. My preference? The sickly, pale, intellectual who watches rain droplets slide down the window in Autumn. Lastly, if I enjoy the company of a person I tend to not want to let them go.
Thank you for taking the time to read my post and have a good day. I ask that you send a DM instead of a chat and that you give the English translation of my title as your own.
Goodbye...Or perhaps untill we meet again
2024.05.19 12:14 funlol3 How I Keep My Car Insurance Rates as Low as Possible
What's up Panda's?
As someone who's always looking to save a buck wherever possible, I've spent quite a bit of time figuring out how to keep my car insurance rates low. I thought I’d share my strategies with you all, so here's everything I do to make sure I’m not overpaying for car insurance:
What are your tips for keeping car insurance costs down? Let’s share and help each other out!
submitted by funlol3 to InsurancePanda [link] [comments]
As someone who's always looking to save a buck wherever possible, I've spent quite a bit of time figuring out how to keep my car insurance rates low. I thought I’d share my strategies with you all, so here's everything I do to make sure I’m not overpaying for car insurance:
- Shop Around Annually: Insurance rates vary widely between companies. Each year, I take some time to compare rates from different insurers to ensure I'm getting the best deal. It's surprising how much you can save by just shopping around!
- Bundle Policies: I've bundled my car insurance with my homeowner’s insurance. Most insurers offer a significant discount for multiple policies. It simplifies my payments too!
- Maintain a Good Credit Score: Many people don't realize that your credit score can affect your insurance rates. I keep my credit score high by paying bills on time and keeping my credit utilization low.
- Drive Safely: This one might be obvious, but avoiding accidents and traffic violations keeps my insurance rates down. Insurers often offer discounts for good drivers, so it pays to drive cautiously.
- Use a Higher Deductible: Opting for a higher deductible can significantly lower your premiums. I make sure I have enough saved to cover the deductible in case of an accident.
- Take Advantage of Discounts: I always ask about discounts. Many companies offer reductions for things like anti-theft devices, being a good student, or even for driving a low number of miles each year.
- Drive a Less Expensive Car: High-end cars are more expensive to insure. I stick to models that are cheaper to repair and aren’t targeted as often by thieves.
- Review My Coverage: I regularly review my coverage to make sure it's not more than I need. For example, older cars might not need comprehensive coverage if they're not worth much.
- Attend Defensive Driving Courses: Some insurers offer a discount if you complete an approved defensive driving course. Plus, it’s a great way to brush up on safe driving techniques.
- Stay Informed: I keep myself updated on any changes in the insurance industry that might affect my rates, such as new laws or changes in technology.
What are your tips for keeping car insurance costs down? Let’s share and help each other out!
2024.05.19 12:11 Hazzysky 33 M New Zealand, Looking to make some long term friends (besties maybe🥺) for chats, maybe some games
Hi all, I'm looking to make some long term friends. I have been struggling alot with some mental stuff recently, there I said it haha. I've also been struggling with an injury recently trying to get myself better.
I have a hard time with making friends these days. And I've been wanting to make new friends that could stick around, maybe become besties all going well (sorry if that sounds lame). I hope you could be available for chats (voice ideally) and hangouts on a somewhat regular basis. However, I of course am fully understanding as we all have lives and stuff gets in the way, but hopefully we could still stay connected?
So I'm 33 M from New Zealand timezone is GMT+12, im fully open to anyone from anywhere, just as long as our timezones vaguely line up. I'm a chill relaxed person, I'm pretty shy and introverted, but do open up once I know someone. I'm also an accepting person, I am open to any gender or LGBTQ+, probably just 20+ would be my main thing.
So more about me, I'm pretty active, like to lift weights at the gym and ride bikes, and of course gaming. I'm PC only for gaming, mainly FPS, horror, hack and slash games, see my previous posts for specific games if your interested, or just ask me :). I would like to game with prospective friends, but all good if not. I also enjoy movies/tv shows, like horror, thrillers, sci fi. I love music in particular metal and punk, specially metalcore and post hardcore :). I really enjoy voice chats too, again I'm happy to not voice chat, but I find it nicer to get to know someone better. So yea if any of that sounds interesting, hit me up and send me a dm or chat, please introduce yourself with a brief intro, very short messages will be ignored. I look forward to hearing from you :).
submitted by Hazzysky to Needafriend [link] [comments]
I have a hard time with making friends these days. And I've been wanting to make new friends that could stick around, maybe become besties all going well (sorry if that sounds lame). I hope you could be available for chats (voice ideally) and hangouts on a somewhat regular basis. However, I of course am fully understanding as we all have lives and stuff gets in the way, but hopefully we could still stay connected?
So I'm 33 M from New Zealand timezone is GMT+12, im fully open to anyone from anywhere, just as long as our timezones vaguely line up. I'm a chill relaxed person, I'm pretty shy and introverted, but do open up once I know someone. I'm also an accepting person, I am open to any gender or LGBTQ+, probably just 20+ would be my main thing.
So more about me, I'm pretty active, like to lift weights at the gym and ride bikes, and of course gaming. I'm PC only for gaming, mainly FPS, horror, hack and slash games, see my previous posts for specific games if your interested, or just ask me :). I would like to game with prospective friends, but all good if not. I also enjoy movies/tv shows, like horror, thrillers, sci fi. I love music in particular metal and punk, specially metalcore and post hardcore :). I really enjoy voice chats too, again I'm happy to not voice chat, but I find it nicer to get to know someone better. So yea if any of that sounds interesting, hit me up and send me a dm or chat, please introduce yourself with a brief intro, very short messages will be ignored. I look forward to hearing from you :).
2024.05.19 12:03 John_Swift1 How I passed my SHRM-CP (without the Learning System)
As I was studying for the SHRM-CP exam, I came across several posts on here that were useful in helping me along the process, so I thought I would share some information on how I passed for future test takers. Please note that I did NOT purchase the SHRM Learning System. I studied by myself using free online resources and a few books I bought off Amazon. Prep/Study Time
I studied for about 4–5 weeks. On weekdays I studied between 1–3 hours per day, on the weekends I would do 4–6 hours per day, and during the last 7–10 days, I studied about 4–6 hours per day. Of course, I took a few nights off here and there as well. Keep in mind that you may need to study more or less given your work experience (I have a Master’s in I/O Psych and about 2 years of relevant work experience). To be honest, I wish I had started studying 2–3 weeks earlier. I would recommend giving yourself at least 1.5–2 months to prepare for this exam.
Resources:
B) see how the SHRM website defines it,
C) use one of my other resources to find a definition
D) go to Youtube to learn more.
2) SHRM-CP Exam by certexamdb Test Prep: You can find in here
I explored a few different practice exams, but this was by far the most useful. You cannot use this as your only resource, but it is a great start.
3) PHSPHR Professional in Human Resources Certification Study Guide by Anne Bogardus: You can actually find a PDF of this online for free. At some point throughout the study process (usually after a practice exam), you will likely realize that you need to go into more depth with certain concepts. This is where this study guide comes in. I didn’t read it word for word, but I spent a few hours skimming through it, went through some of the practice questions at the end of each chapter, and read in detail certain sections that I was weak on. This resource is very detailed but not too complicated which is great. I would highly recommend allocating 1–2 study days just for going through this resource. Keep in mind that it will provide you with more detail than you need, but you can just focus on the concepts that are relevant to the SHRM-CP.
4) SHRM-CP/SHRM-SCP Certification Practice Exams (All in One) by Kelly and Simon-Walters. About 10 days before my exam, I came across this resource which consisted of 500 questions that were broken down into each of the sections outlined in the SHRM BoCK. When I took the practice exam in the certexamdb Test Prep I scored terribly on the situational judgment questions. This book is GREAT for preparing you for those questions. Just keep in mind two things when using this resource:
It will consist of some questions with terms or concepts that you did not come across in any of the other resources — you can just ignore those (it’s extra information that you do not necessarily need), (2) the quick answer key has some inaccuracies (ignore it) but the answer key with detailed explanations is correct so make sure you use that when scoring yourself. Make sure you answer both the SHRM-CP and the SHRM-SCP questions (they are both relevant). This really helps with the situational judgment questions, but also with knowing how some of the terms and definitions apply in a real setting. When focusing on these questions, I realized that I had memorized some definitions, but I still didn’t know how to apply those concepts. This book helps with that.
5) Quizlet Flashcards created by other people — A lot of people have created quizlet sets (even from the Learning System) that they have uploaded. Those are free, so make sure you use them! Also, some people have even created practice sets for exam questions (which I think are from the learning system as well), so make sure you review those as well! Basic Study Tips: Unfortunately, without the Learning System, there is no single resource that you can use to prepare for this exam. Therefore, make sure you use a few resources just to make sure you get exposed to most of the material that will be on the exam. As you go through each resource, keep revising your flashcards and adding new ones. Make sure you periodically review flashcards as you go rather than waiting to cram everything in a week before the exam. When you go through practice questions, you will soon realize that you often need to know more than just the definition… you need to know when and how something applies as well. For example, you need to know what FMLA is, but you also need to know what the eligibility criteria is, when it is applicable, etc… I had one massive set of flashcards (about 500), and then I also had smaller sets of flashcards for some sections (e.g., a set for HR Laws, another set for Finance/Accounting terms). I would memorize using the smaller sets, but then I went through the giant set I had created a few days before my exam to make sure I knew everything. Do a ton of practice questions and understand why you got certain questions wrong.
6) SHRM LMS Books
Here’s a quick overview of the step-by-step process I took to study and prepare:
I finished the exam in a little over three hours. You get no breaks, but you can always take them as needed. Time is likely not going to be an issue. Here are some takeaways that I had about the exam: — There were surprisingly few questions on US Employment Laws & Regulations and Labor Unions. I spent a lot on these sections when studying, but there were not many questions at all on these topics. — The test questions were different than any of the practice exams I had taken (however you should be fine as long as you know the material) — The situational judgment questions can be exhausting with having to read 2–3 paragraphs for each 2–3 questions. — Make sure you carefully read the question. For example, you are often asked “what is the first step you would take” or “what strategy would you use.” These can be tricky, but they can also easily reveal the right answer. — No matter how hard you study, you will encounter a few questions where you come across terms that you’re unfamiliar with and you will have to guess blindly. Just try to eliminate what you do know is wrong and take your best guess. Don’t stress too much about it. — Use the highlight, strike through, and flagging options during the exam. It helps a lot. — Often, the correct answers for the situational judgment questions have something to do with (1) getting leadership buy-in, (2) having HR be a strategic partner, (3) making sure the action is aligned with the org’s mission and vision (4) HR being proactive, (5) doing a needs assessment of some sort, (6) having HR be some sort of facilitator.
submitted by John_Swift1 to HumanResourcesExam [link] [comments]
I studied for about 4–5 weeks. On weekdays I studied between 1–3 hours per day, on the weekends I would do 4–6 hours per day, and during the last 7–10 days, I studied about 4–6 hours per day. Of course, I took a few nights off here and there as well. Keep in mind that you may need to study more or less given your work experience (I have a Master’s in I/O Psych and about 2 years of relevant work experience). To be honest, I wish I had started studying 2–3 weeks earlier. I would recommend giving yourself at least 1.5–2 months to prepare for this exam.
Resources:
- SHRM BoCK — This is a free PDF that you can download off the SHRM website. I used this resource to guide my overall learning. I dissected the entire document and made flashcards on Quizlet for everything I did not know. In particular, I focused on the “key concepts” for each section and made sure I knew the definition of each term. There is also a glossary of terms and definitions at the end of the document, so I added all those terms into Quizlet as well. The glossary does not have every definition you will need to know, but it’s a good start. For the terms I could not find a definition for, I would either
B) see how the SHRM website defines it,
C) use one of my other resources to find a definition
D) go to Youtube to learn more.
2) SHRM-CP Exam by certexamdb Test Prep: You can find in here
I explored a few different practice exams, but this was by far the most useful. You cannot use this as your only resource, but it is a great start.
3) PHSPHR Professional in Human Resources Certification Study Guide by Anne Bogardus: You can actually find a PDF of this online for free. At some point throughout the study process (usually after a practice exam), you will likely realize that you need to go into more depth with certain concepts. This is where this study guide comes in. I didn’t read it word for word, but I spent a few hours skimming through it, went through some of the practice questions at the end of each chapter, and read in detail certain sections that I was weak on. This resource is very detailed but not too complicated which is great. I would highly recommend allocating 1–2 study days just for going through this resource. Keep in mind that it will provide you with more detail than you need, but you can just focus on the concepts that are relevant to the SHRM-CP.
4) SHRM-CP/SHRM-SCP Certification Practice Exams (All in One) by Kelly and Simon-Walters. About 10 days before my exam, I came across this resource which consisted of 500 questions that were broken down into each of the sections outlined in the SHRM BoCK. When I took the practice exam in the certexamdb Test Prep I scored terribly on the situational judgment questions. This book is GREAT for preparing you for those questions. Just keep in mind two things when using this resource:
It will consist of some questions with terms or concepts that you did not come across in any of the other resources — you can just ignore those (it’s extra information that you do not necessarily need), (2) the quick answer key has some inaccuracies (ignore it) but the answer key with detailed explanations is correct so make sure you use that when scoring yourself. Make sure you answer both the SHRM-CP and the SHRM-SCP questions (they are both relevant). This really helps with the situational judgment questions, but also with knowing how some of the terms and definitions apply in a real setting. When focusing on these questions, I realized that I had memorized some definitions, but I still didn’t know how to apply those concepts. This book helps with that.
5) Quizlet Flashcards created by other people — A lot of people have created quizlet sets (even from the Learning System) that they have uploaded. Those are free, so make sure you use them! Also, some people have even created practice sets for exam questions (which I think are from the learning system as well), so make sure you review those as well! Basic Study Tips: Unfortunately, without the Learning System, there is no single resource that you can use to prepare for this exam. Therefore, make sure you use a few resources just to make sure you get exposed to most of the material that will be on the exam. As you go through each resource, keep revising your flashcards and adding new ones. Make sure you periodically review flashcards as you go rather than waiting to cram everything in a week before the exam. When you go through practice questions, you will soon realize that you often need to know more than just the definition… you need to know when and how something applies as well. For example, you need to know what FMLA is, but you also need to know what the eligibility criteria is, when it is applicable, etc… I had one massive set of flashcards (about 500), and then I also had smaller sets of flashcards for some sections (e.g., a set for HR Laws, another set for Finance/Accounting terms). I would memorize using the smaller sets, but then I went through the giant set I had created a few days before my exam to make sure I knew everything. Do a ton of practice questions and understand why you got certain questions wrong.
6) SHRM LMS Books
Here’s a quick overview of the step-by-step process I took to study and prepare:
- Go through SHRM-BoCK and create flashcards
- Go through and memorize SHRM Learning System Flashcards (You can find these on Quizlet and search “SHRM Learning System”)
- Take certexamdb Test Prep Practice Exam, review, and identify weak areas.
- Go through the Bogardus PHSPHR book and focus on weak areas (fill in flashcards)
- Memorize the newly created flashcards for weak areas, flag ones that you continually get wrong or confused with.
- YouTube hazy concepts and terms to gain a richer understanding, use Khan Academy when applicable.
- Retake certexamdb Practice Exam
- Go through questions in the book by Kelly and Simon-Walters
- Identify weak areas, read through explanations, create and memorize flash cards as needed
- A few days before my exam, focus on my large stack of flashcards, go through other people’s flashcard sets, and go through practice exams on Quizlet.
I finished the exam in a little over three hours. You get no breaks, but you can always take them as needed. Time is likely not going to be an issue. Here are some takeaways that I had about the exam: — There were surprisingly few questions on US Employment Laws & Regulations and Labor Unions. I spent a lot on these sections when studying, but there were not many questions at all on these topics. — The test questions were different than any of the practice exams I had taken (however you should be fine as long as you know the material) — The situational judgment questions can be exhausting with having to read 2–3 paragraphs for each 2–3 questions. — Make sure you carefully read the question. For example, you are often asked “what is the first step you would take” or “what strategy would you use.” These can be tricky, but they can also easily reveal the right answer. — No matter how hard you study, you will encounter a few questions where you come across terms that you’re unfamiliar with and you will have to guess blindly. Just try to eliminate what you do know is wrong and take your best guess. Don’t stress too much about it. — Use the highlight, strike through, and flagging options during the exam. It helps a lot. — Often, the correct answers for the situational judgment questions have something to do with (1) getting leadership buy-in, (2) having HR be a strategic partner, (3) making sure the action is aligned with the org’s mission and vision (4) HR being proactive, (5) doing a needs assessment of some sort, (6) having HR be some sort of facilitator.
2024.05.19 12:03 EndersGame_Reviewer Thoughts on Babette's Feast (1987)
Babette's Feast (1987) is a highly regarded arthouse film with strong spiritual themes. It won an Oscar for Best Foreign Language Film, and has received much critical acclaim. But is it simply something pretentious, or is the respect its gained well deserved? And does it even have something serious to say?
The film introduces us to the two sisters Martine and Filippa, who are part of a very strict Puritanical and ascetic Protestant church group that was started by their father. He’s now deceased, although the first part of the film does show us some of the background, where they spurn the love of two young men in favour of the ascetic lifestyle taught by their father. The main story begins when we see them as aging spinsters, giving refuge to a needy woman from France, who is our central character, Babette.
After she wins the lottery, Babette wants to express her gratitude to her hosts for 14 years of their hospitality by cooking them with a sumptuous meal on what would have been their father’s 100th birthday. Afraid of enjoying earthly pleasure, the ascetic group solemnly agrees in advance that they will act as if the delightful food and drink doesn't have any real taste. But can they really maintain this illusion when the food is that good? Aside from this main storyline, the film also touches on some inner conflicts among the church group.
The film is in the French language, although the version I watched had an optional soundtrack with a dubbed English voice-over. Despite not knowing French, I found it far more enjoyable to use English subtitles along with the original French soundtrack. This maintains the more subtle voice inflections of the actors, and it’s surprising how much of the authenticity and impact is lost without this.
But why is this film so charming, and what has made it such a success? Aren’t we basically just watching a group of people solemnly eating a meal? Cynics will find a lot to make fun of here. But for those prepared to chew a little, there’s more than what meets the eye. To begin with, the characterization is excellent, and the depiction of the two single ladies who have forsaken everything for their faith is particularly well done. Babette’s humble service and her extravagant gift, along with all its culinary delights, is beautifully presented, in a slow-moving and serene way.
In many respects Babette's Feast first and foremost shows the foolishness of a faith that is artificial and ascetic. The feast that Babette prepares highlights the hypocrisy of the religious sect, by exposing the foolishness of their religion of externals. The Protestant group is blind to the value of the gift they are enjoying, contrasting with the visiting General and with Babette, who see and understand how things really are. There seems to be an implied critique on such ascetic religious groups, with the General functioning as a character who is enlightened despite his simplicity. True religion doesn’t just practice piety, but there also finds room to enjoy life’s pleasures.
But there is more going on besides this obvious message. Many commentators have suggested that Babette is essentially a Christ-like figure, because she gives a gift of grace in a meal that has overtones of Christ's last supper. This interpretation gives her meal a sacramental quality, and when viewed in this light, it gives a whole new perspective on the film. There may be something to this, because there is a sense in which Babette selfishly sacrifices all she has for her two patrons. Reading what Catholic reviewers like Stephen Greydanus have to say about the sacramental aspect of the film is especially interesting (link to his review). Other reviewers suggest a Lutheran interpretation, and focus more on how the film depicts a marriage between the spiritual and the carnal. Given the Danish setting, a Lutheran background to the theology is also very plausible.
You’ll find a wide range of theological interpretations among critics, so there is lots of room for discussion here. I'd be reluctant to insist on a particular interpretation, because it seems to me that the film already does us a service by stimulating such discussions, rather than coming to definitive conclusions on them.
But clearly the film does want us thinking about theology, because Martine and Filippa are named after the Protestant Reformers Martin Luther and Philipp Melanchton. Central to Protestant theology is the notion that good deeds are not done to earn a heavenly reward, but are a grateful response to a God-given gift of grace. Ironically, it’s Babette’s generous gift that captures this spirit more than the combined piety of the two sisters and their religious group. It’s possible to be so intent on pursuing piety that one misses the point of life, and fails to enjoy grace and the pleasures God gives.
The suggestion has been made by some that Babette's feast helps change the characters, and causes old quarrels to be healed, and past sins to be genuinely forgiven. If so, this raises interesting questions about the nature of sacraments, and how they function. But I’m left wondering whether it really is the film’s goal to suggest that the sacramental quality of the feast helps dispense grace and solve the sharp differences and shortcomings within the small group. For example, many reviewers see the positive discussions that the group has about their religious leader while enjoying the meal as evidence of its transforming quality.
But does this elaborate feast really transform the characters who share in it, like a sacramental eucharist might do? I’m not convinced, because it seems to me that these conversations could equally be their way of desperately avoiding talking about the gift itself, by turning to pious talk that had nothing to do with the food, and are evidence that they’re stubbornly persisting with their religious blindness. But perhaps repeated viewings of the film might cause me to reconsider this view.
The film also raises interesting questions about the value of art, as is evident from what the famous opera singer Achille Papin says about art in the afterlife. This conversation returns in the film’s concluding words to Babette about her art as chef. Filippa echoes what Papin had said to her, promising that in paradise Babette will be the great artist God intended her to be. An artist will always give their best, and that’s exactly what Babette’s extravagant feast is.
Clearly there’s more to Babette’s Feast than meets the eye, and I feel I’ve only scratched the surface of its meaning. Extensive full length academic papers have been written about it, some of which can be found online. For me anyway, spending time at Babette’s table has only increased my appetite to find out more about this thoughtful film. I'd love to get insights and perspectives from others who have enjoyed it.
submitted by EndersGame_Reviewer to TrueFilm [link] [comments]
The film introduces us to the two sisters Martine and Filippa, who are part of a very strict Puritanical and ascetic Protestant church group that was started by their father. He’s now deceased, although the first part of the film does show us some of the background, where they spurn the love of two young men in favour of the ascetic lifestyle taught by their father. The main story begins when we see them as aging spinsters, giving refuge to a needy woman from France, who is our central character, Babette.
After she wins the lottery, Babette wants to express her gratitude to her hosts for 14 years of their hospitality by cooking them with a sumptuous meal on what would have been their father’s 100th birthday. Afraid of enjoying earthly pleasure, the ascetic group solemnly agrees in advance that they will act as if the delightful food and drink doesn't have any real taste. But can they really maintain this illusion when the food is that good? Aside from this main storyline, the film also touches on some inner conflicts among the church group.
The film is in the French language, although the version I watched had an optional soundtrack with a dubbed English voice-over. Despite not knowing French, I found it far more enjoyable to use English subtitles along with the original French soundtrack. This maintains the more subtle voice inflections of the actors, and it’s surprising how much of the authenticity and impact is lost without this.
But why is this film so charming, and what has made it such a success? Aren’t we basically just watching a group of people solemnly eating a meal? Cynics will find a lot to make fun of here. But for those prepared to chew a little, there’s more than what meets the eye. To begin with, the characterization is excellent, and the depiction of the two single ladies who have forsaken everything for their faith is particularly well done. Babette’s humble service and her extravagant gift, along with all its culinary delights, is beautifully presented, in a slow-moving and serene way.
In many respects Babette's Feast first and foremost shows the foolishness of a faith that is artificial and ascetic. The feast that Babette prepares highlights the hypocrisy of the religious sect, by exposing the foolishness of their religion of externals. The Protestant group is blind to the value of the gift they are enjoying, contrasting with the visiting General and with Babette, who see and understand how things really are. There seems to be an implied critique on such ascetic religious groups, with the General functioning as a character who is enlightened despite his simplicity. True religion doesn’t just practice piety, but there also finds room to enjoy life’s pleasures.
But there is more going on besides this obvious message. Many commentators have suggested that Babette is essentially a Christ-like figure, because she gives a gift of grace in a meal that has overtones of Christ's last supper. This interpretation gives her meal a sacramental quality, and when viewed in this light, it gives a whole new perspective on the film. There may be something to this, because there is a sense in which Babette selfishly sacrifices all she has for her two patrons. Reading what Catholic reviewers like Stephen Greydanus have to say about the sacramental aspect of the film is especially interesting (link to his review). Other reviewers suggest a Lutheran interpretation, and focus more on how the film depicts a marriage between the spiritual and the carnal. Given the Danish setting, a Lutheran background to the theology is also very plausible.
You’ll find a wide range of theological interpretations among critics, so there is lots of room for discussion here. I'd be reluctant to insist on a particular interpretation, because it seems to me that the film already does us a service by stimulating such discussions, rather than coming to definitive conclusions on them.
But clearly the film does want us thinking about theology, because Martine and Filippa are named after the Protestant Reformers Martin Luther and Philipp Melanchton. Central to Protestant theology is the notion that good deeds are not done to earn a heavenly reward, but are a grateful response to a God-given gift of grace. Ironically, it’s Babette’s generous gift that captures this spirit more than the combined piety of the two sisters and their religious group. It’s possible to be so intent on pursuing piety that one misses the point of life, and fails to enjoy grace and the pleasures God gives.
The suggestion has been made by some that Babette's feast helps change the characters, and causes old quarrels to be healed, and past sins to be genuinely forgiven. If so, this raises interesting questions about the nature of sacraments, and how they function. But I’m left wondering whether it really is the film’s goal to suggest that the sacramental quality of the feast helps dispense grace and solve the sharp differences and shortcomings within the small group. For example, many reviewers see the positive discussions that the group has about their religious leader while enjoying the meal as evidence of its transforming quality.
But does this elaborate feast really transform the characters who share in it, like a sacramental eucharist might do? I’m not convinced, because it seems to me that these conversations could equally be their way of desperately avoiding talking about the gift itself, by turning to pious talk that had nothing to do with the food, and are evidence that they’re stubbornly persisting with their religious blindness. But perhaps repeated viewings of the film might cause me to reconsider this view.
The film also raises interesting questions about the value of art, as is evident from what the famous opera singer Achille Papin says about art in the afterlife. This conversation returns in the film’s concluding words to Babette about her art as chef. Filippa echoes what Papin had said to her, promising that in paradise Babette will be the great artist God intended her to be. An artist will always give their best, and that’s exactly what Babette’s extravagant feast is.
Clearly there’s more to Babette’s Feast than meets the eye, and I feel I’ve only scratched the surface of its meaning. Extensive full length academic papers have been written about it, some of which can be found online. For me anyway, spending time at Babette’s table has only increased my appetite to find out more about this thoughtful film. I'd love to get insights and perspectives from others who have enjoyed it.
2024.05.19 12:00 AutoModerator Weekly Reminder: Rules and FAQ - May 19, 2024 (Now with updates!)
Below you will find a weekly reminder of our Rules and partial FAQ. It's definitely a long read, but it's worth your time, especially if you are new to the community, or dropping by as a result of a link you found elsewhere. We periodically revise our rules, this weekly notice will help keep you informed of any changes made.
NOTE: These rules are guidelines. Some moderation discretion is to be expected.
submitted by AutoModerator to stepparents [link] [comments]
NOTE: These rules are guidelines. Some moderation discretion is to be expected.
Community Rules
1. Kindness Matters
Advise, don't criticize.- Post with empathy, thoughtfulness, and constructive commentary rather than judgment. Don't be an asshole.
- Name-calling, slurs (including gender or race based slurs), and insults towards other community members will not be tolerated. Do not attack others for their personally held values, custody situation, marital status, physical distance from stepkids, or economic status; or on the basis of race, sex, sexual orientation, age, religion, or ethnicity.
- No name-calling toward children, including the above-mentioned insults or the term "skids", or terms such as "mini-wife" or "mini-husband."
- Comments advocating spanking or any mention of wanting to harm children are not allowed.
- This is a support sub, not a judgement sub, assholes are not tolerated. Comments with terms used in other subs to pass judgement on assholes will be removed.
2. No Drama
This is a support sub.- Bickering, nitpicking, and thread derailment will not be tolerated and will be subject to removal at moderator discretion.
- Do not repeatedly badger a poster demanding answers, or refuse to acknowledge an answer that's already been given.
- Do not use sensitive issues from past posts (either from this sub or other subs) to attack another user, as we are all discussing vulnerable topics.
- Crossposting anything from /stepparents to any other subreddit might result in a ban and may result in the original thread being locked. Brigading our sub will result in an immediate ban.
3. Report, Don’t Rant
No backseat modding.- If you see someone breaking the rules, report the post or comment to the mods rather than engaging them in an argument. Failure to do so may be subject to comment removal at moderator discretion.
- No meta posts complaining about rude comments, DMs, or general sub issues.
- If you think someone is a troll or previously banned user, either use the report function or message the mods to direct their attention to the issue.
4. No Naming & Shaming
No userpings or links.- Tagging/pinging users or other subreddits in an attempt to bully, harass, or complain will not be tolerated. Do not tag other subs, ever.
- If you want to complain about another subreddit being hostile to stepparents, do not name the subreddit. "Other parenting/advice/judgement subs" will suffice.
5. No Platitudes
Nobody knew what they were getting into.- Comments like "You knew what you were getting into", "Love them, love their kids!", "They're a package deal!" and "You have to love them like your own!" will be removed.
- Comments suggesting that OP is not cut out for stepparenting will be removed at moderator discretion.
- Comments like "This is just a part of parenting, deal with it!" will be removed at moderator discretion.
6. No Trolling
We have zero tolerance for trolls.- This is a support sub. Our subscribers do not have the time, nor inclination, to provide support to internet trolls. Posts that are suspected to be trolling attempts will be immediately removed, and the poster banned.
- Concern trolling, devil's advocating, gish-galloping, sealioning, and general asshattery are subject to immediate removal and banning without warning or notice.
- Any attempt to circumvent the ban by creating a new username will be reported to reddit admins and possibly result in account suspension.
7. No Personally Identifiable Information
Use discretion when posting.- We highly recommend using a separate account for support subs to help prevent being doxxed. Do not post any information that may allow others to figure out your identity.
- Do not post photos of children, or any other photo that could be used to identify you or another user on the sub.
- Any image that contains a name or other identifying information should have the name or identifying information blurred out. This includes drawings, notes, and screenshots.
- Do not link to social media or any articles/blogs where you or another user on the sub is mentioned by name.
8. No More than 2 Posts per 24 hours
Use the daily threads.- We are not a huge sub, but we are no longer a small sub. If you have multiple grievances to air, use the daily discussion threads instead of multiple posts.
9. Follow Reddiquette
Remember the human.- Adhere to the same standards of behavior online that you follow in real life.
- Read it in full here.
- Downvoting is reserved for comments that don’t contribute, and shouldn't be used to indicate disagreement.
- If you believe someone is in violation of the subreddit rules, please either use the report function or message the mods to direct their attention to the issue.
- Suspected brigading will be reported to reddit admins.
10. No Porn, Spam, Blogs, or Research Studies/Surveys Without Mod Approval
Just don't.- This is a SFW subreddit. Posting pornography will result in immediate post removal and permanent ban.
- Advertising on the subreddit (outside of Reddit's own advertising) is not allowed.
- No personal blog posts are allowed without express moderator permission.
- No advertising without prior mod approval.
- No asking for money/posting fundraisers/etc.
- For links to parenting research studies or surveys, please message the mods for permission before posting.
11. Disputes in Modmail Only
Don't argue with the mods on the sub.- Any issues specifically related to how a mod is moderating should be addressed to the full moderating team via mod mail. This ensures that all mods are aware of any concerns and prevents disintegration of the topic thread at hand.
- This means to do not message or send chat requests to individual mods. All discussion and complaints about mod actions need to be done in mod mail ONLY. Failure to follow this rule can result in an immediate permanent ban.
- Comments in threads asking about mod decisions are subject to removal without notice.
12. Moderator Actions
We aren't kidding.- Users are expected to know the rules before posting. If you are warned or banned for violating the rules, ignorance is not an excuse.
- Moderators will remove posts and comments and/or lock threads in accordance with the rules above. Typically this happens when threads have gone off-topic in a way that is not productive for the OP, or comments overall have become contentious or disrespectful.
- If a poster continues to argue or to willfully violate these rules, temporary and permanent ban procedures will be followed. Any attempts to avoid or bypass temporary bans will result in a permanent ban. User bans will not be discussed in the sub. Questions posted about user bans are subject to removal and the poster subject to warning/ban procedures. The mod team will not discuss a specific user ban with anyone other than the user involved.
- New accounts are subject to manual approval until they are no longer deemed "new" by the mod team. This helps to weed out trolls and ban evaders.
- We rely on Automoderator to scan for specific words and phrases that are not welcome here and notify the mod team to review the comment or post. This includes slurs of any type and platitudes such as "Love them as your own!"
- The mod team uses a combination of blacklisting and banning when dealing with trolls.
- We employ the use of a bot that automatically bans anyone who comments in subs that have historically harassed our users. If you are picked up by the bot for telling trolls to get fucked, reach out via mod mail and we'll get you sorted out.
- The rules above as well as ban procedures are considered guidelines only; some deviation may be necessary on a case by case basis and/or at the mod team's discretion.
13. Ban Procedure
These actions are at moderator discretion.- Pornography will result in an automatic permanent ban.
- Extremely egregious content will result in an immediate permanent ban.
- You may receive a 7 or 30 day temporary ban for first and second rule violations, depending upon severity.
- Continued rule violations will result in a permanent ban.
- Willful attempts to avoid or bypass temporary bans will result in a permanent ban.
- We recognize the reddit site-wide rules of using alt names to get around bans and will ban those as well as report them to reddit admins.
FAQ - About the Rules
What does Kindness Matters mean?
- Shortest version? Don't be an asshole. People come here for support and advice, they do not come here to be yelled at or told they are the reason everything is going sideways. There are ways to point out that someone may want to do some reflection on their own actions and reactions without being an asshole about it.
- The purpose of this subreddit is to provide support and a sense of belonging for struggling stepparents. We aren't here to pass judgement, but rather to offer support, empathy, and constructive commentary. That does not include "hard truths" or "tough love." Stepparents get enough of that in every other subreddit, we're not passing it out here. Be respectful.
- Remember, most people aren't going to come to a sub like this when everything is going great and everyone is getting along. People are coming here when they are down, when they are feeling defeated and stretched to the limit. Kicking someone when they are down is shitty behavior and we don't tolerate it.
What about being kind to the kids?
- "Won't somebody think of the children?" Pearl clutching isn't needed here. If you read the Kindness Matters rule closely, you will see that there is a clause in there about name calling children. We don't allow it. We also don't allow people rolling in telling OP that they feel sorry for their stepkids because OP is feeling overwhelmed and overloaded.
- If anyone is advocating slapping, spanking, or any other form of violence, report the comment immediately. We do not advocate violence towards children of any sort. The mod team does not advocate any sort of physical punishment at any time.
- Venting about behaviors is not the same as insulting the kids. However, if you see a post or comment where kids are being name called or dragged to the point of no return, use the report button. We try to catch the posts and remove them before they hit the sub, but we cannot see every comment without your help. Use the report button to bring problematic comments to our attention. Don't engage in a war of words on our subreddit.
Why is this sub such an echo chamber?
- Not allowing contributors to pile on and tell OP that they are a terrible human being who should never be around children does not equate to being an echo chamber. Many contributors here will offer OP suggestions to help them work through their resentments and frustrations, and the most egregious situations are called out. We simply ask that it be called out with respect.
- If you feel that a post is simply too much for you to handle without following the rules, move on to another post.
- If you believe that a post itself is crossing the rules report it. If the mod team has approved the post, it is because the mod team believes that the OP needs help from the community or needs a moment to vent and move on from their vent. That does not give you license to pile on disrespectfully. Unless it is proven that OP is a bot, assume that OP is a human being with real thoughts and feelings and has posted from a place of vulnerability.
Why can't I tell OP that they are an asshole?
- Because this isn't a judgement sub. We aren't AITA, we don't want to be AITA.
- Comments with terms like YTA, NTA, ESH, NAH will be removed.
- Don't start your posts with INFO either. We generally recognize that as a fishing attempt for more information to pass judgement on OP, and again, we are not a judgment sub.
But OP asked if they were an asshole?!
- Their post somehow got past our automoderator. Just use the report button. We will address it with OP.
- If you've asked if you are an asshole, a-hole, a*hole, a**hole, whatever, don't be surprised if your post is removed without warning. This isn't a judgment sub. If you want judgment, you know where to go.
What is a gendered slur?
- While it seems that everyone understands what racist slurs are, people struggle understanding the concept of gendered slurs. Generally speaking, we are talking about derogatory nouns or verbs that are used to negatively describe people or situations based on gendered terms.
- We've gone back and forth on this a few times, and the truth is, we get it, it's your safe space and you want to be able to vent about BM/BD how you want to vent about them, without us telling you how to vent about them. Fair enough. Vent away. What we are going to stick to here how people are referring to other users and to stepchildren.
- Examples that are not allowed:
- "My SD is such a little bitch."
- "She dresses/acts like a slut."
- "My SS acts like a pussy."
- "My SS is such a beta male."
- "You are all fucking whores."
- "Any dude who is raising some sluts kids is a cuck!"
- "Little Lord Fauntleroy over here thinking he runs the house!"
- "You're just the bangnanny, get used to it."
- Don't call users here names, don't call stepchildren names.
- Masking the term with asterisks or other neat little tricks might get you around the bot, but if we see it, we're removing it and quite possibly giving you a time out. The intended word is still there and you deliberately tried to skate the rule.
- As there is not enough space to list every term that is offensive and does not belong, nor every situation in which term or phrase may be allowable in context, this rule is enforced based on moderator discretion.
Seriously? You are the language police now?
- We're here to talk about stepparenting. And we would like for that to happen in a respectful way. Attacking each other doesn't help. Belittling stepchildren draws in trolls who don't understand your frustration, all they see is an evil stepmonster talking shit on the internet about a poor, innocent baby. Yes, even if that "poor, innocent baby" just robbed you blind and set fire to the house on their way out the door. That's just how it goes.
- We are aware that this is a relatively new rule and a lot of older posts and comments contain a lot of problematic language, including some from mods themselves. We are growing and evolving, and rules change as the sub grows and evolves.
What does No Drama really mean?
- Pretty much what it says, do not bring drama from other subs into this sub. Do not engage in vote brigades. Do not try to incite other subscribers to riot in a different sub. Don't follow posters into this sub from other subs to continue to harass them. Do not badger someone or derail threads. Do not harass community members because you don't agree with them. There's enough drama in the daily lives of subscribers, more isn't needed.
What is thread derailment?
- When a comment chain has devolved to the point where all you are doing is arguing back and forth with someone about the same thing over and over again, you have derailed the thread. Also known as bickering. It's what children do. We assume if people are in a stepparent role they are adults. We expect you to act like it.
- If you aren't a stepparent, or in a stepparenting role, consider that perhaps this subreddit isn't for you. If you want to participate, do so with respect. Thread derailment, arguing, bickering, and nitpicking are not allowed.
But what if they didn't answer my question?
- No one has to answer your questions. This is a support sub, not an inquisition. Jumping on a bandwagon with "OP is evading the question" in a 20 comment long chain is the epitome of thread derailment. You'll find more information about trolling below and how this might be considered such.
Why am I being silenced? I'm just asking for a back and forth!
- Thread derailment, badgering, and nitpicking are considered harassment. Continued harassment of either community members or mods will get you banned.
Why can't I look at someone's post history and comment about it?
- No mod in the history of this sub has ever once said post histories are forbidden. What we do frown upon is using someone's post history to attack, belittle, or otherwise harass someone.
- Example Post: "My stepkid's mom really hates me. How can I make this better?"
- Okay: "Based on the timeline and your post history, it looks like this may have started as an affair. Unfortunately there's going to be outstanding issues for a long time due to that. Try focusing on yourself and how you can move forward without worrying about how someone else feels about you."
- Not Okay: "Holy shit! You were the OW! What the hell do you expect, homewrecker?!"
- Example Post: "I am completely overloaded and feeling very down about myself."
- Okay: "In your post history you mentioned that your spouse wasn't really helping around the house. Has that changed at all?"
- Not Okay: "LOL, you already got the answers you need in your post on relationships. You are stupid for sticking with your lazy spouse."
Why can't we crosspost stuff to other subs?
- We can't stop you from doing so. The problem isn't that something has been crossposted, it's when the community that it's been crossposted to feels the need to come over here and harass OP. When we see that happening, we lock the post and start passing out bans. If you did the crossposting, you'll be banned. If you participated in the brigading, you'll be banned.
What if it's my own post?
- Again, we can't stop you from doing so. We prefer that you don't technically crosspost, but rather just copy and paste your post. Why? Because inevitably the above will happen. Redditors from other subs will follow you back to /stepparents and start attacking users here. It just happens.
What is "brigading"?
- Reddit defines vote manipulation and brigading as follows:
- Using multiple accounts, voting services, or any other software to increase or decrease vote scores.
- Asking people to vote up or down certain posts, either on Reddit itself or through social networks, messaging, etc. for personal gain.
- Forming or joining a group that votes together, either on a specific post, a user's posts, posts from a domain, etc.
- We, along with pretty much every other subreddit that has ever had to deal with this nonsense, further define brigading as this: You saw a post on another sub that linked to our sub either via a link in a comment or a crosspost. It was basically saying something along the lines of "OMG, check out these assholes over on /stepparents! They literally hate all their stepkids!" And then you and your friends come over and start hammering on OP and telling OP how much they suck. Congrats, you have just participated in a brigade.
What is this whole Report, Don't Rant thing about?
- If you see a post or comment that breaks the rules, instead of engaging, report it. When you report it, it sends notification to the mod team. We will act on it where appropriate. Engaging with bad faith users may result in your comments being removed. If you repeatedly do so, you may end up being banned.
What if I see an obvious troll?
- Report it.
What if they are being really mean in comments?
- Report it.
What if they are harassing me in private messages?
- Step 1: Report them to admins. You can report harassment to reddit by using this link or send a DM to reddit admins. Include the link to the DM, admins can see your inbox and providing a direct link is helpful for them to weed out bad actors.
- Step 2: Block the person so they cannot directly contact you again.
- Step 3: Send us a mod mail and let the mod team know. Tell us who they are and what they said, send us a screenshot if you can - admins can see your DMs, mods can't. We'll take action where necessary by banning from the sub if they aren't already banned.
What do you mean by No Naming & Shaming?
- Just as we prefer to not be linked to or crossposted from, we do not allow linking to or calling out other subs by name. If you see something you want to share, say it's a hot post that has hit the front page and a stepparent is being absolutely flayed, just refer to it as "that hot post that hit the front page." If you want to complain about other places in general, "other parenting/advice/judgement subs" will suffice. Absolutely under no circumstances should you link to anywhere else.
I can't link to other subs?
- Do not directly link to another sub. (e.g.: "/insertsubnamehere is ridiculously hostile to stepparents!")
- Do not name other subs. (e.g.: "I won't link to it directly, but insertsubnamehere is ridiculously hostile to stepparents!")
- Do not abbreviate other subs. (e.g.: "I know that ISNH is ridiculously hostile to stepparents!")
I can't ping other users?
- Do not summon another user with a username ping/tag. (e.g.: "insertusernamehere was being an asshole.")
- If you are agreeing with someone, it is okay to link to them. (e.g.: "I agree with insertusernamehere, you need to take a couple of steps back and reflect on this.")
What does No Platitudes mean?
- Sanctimonious, overused clichés that grossly oversimplify the stepparenting experience are neither wanted nor allowed here. We have all heard it a thousand times before, we don't need to hear it again. It's not nearly as insightful and wise as some would like to think.
Why don't you people understand it's a package deal?
- Any comment that suggests that OP should have known what they were getting involved with, or that they needed to understand that the kids were part of some package they needed to accept before signing up for marriage is subject to immediate removal.
- This is one of the most insensitive things you can say to a stepparent. Most stepparents were aware of the children, but they were probably not aware of all of the family dynamics.
Why can't you just love them like they are your own?
- Demanding that a stranger you do not know love children that are not biologically theirs as if they were theirs can be incredibly damaging to someone who is already in a vulnerable situation. Any comment that falls along these lines will be removed.
What do you mean by No Trolling? I was just...
- No means no. No trolling. No pretending to be a stepparent and then whipping out the Greatest Hits Bingo Card of The Worst Stepparent in the History of Stepparents. We see you. We've seen you a thousand times.
What does "concern trolling", "gish-galloping", and "sealioning" have to do with stepparenting? This isn't a debate sub, why are you using debate terms?
- That's absolutely right, this isn't a debate sub. And yet, here we are, day after day, having to defend ourselves against this sort of thing. So, enough. No more. Usage of any of these things will get you banned.
What is "Concern Trolling?"
- A concern troll is someone who disingenuously visits sites of an opposing ideology to disrupt conversation by offering unwanted advice on how to solve problems which do not really exist.
- Example Post: OP expresses concern that she will feel, and possibly act, differently towards her stepchildren after her husband decides that no, he doesn't want anymore children after all.
- Example Concern Troll pulled from actual mod mail after their comment was removed: "Possible child abuse claims need to be sorted out well before whatever empathy you believe the OP was looking for."
What is a "Devil's Advocate"?
- "I'm just playing devil's advocate here, but have you considered that maybe BM is just really tired and needs a break, too?" BM has dozens of different mom based subs alone on reddit she can complain on, this sub is for stepparents. The stepparent doesn't need to consider that maybe BM is just really tired and needs a break.
"Gish-galloping?" What does that even mean?
- The Gish Gallop is the fallacious debate tactic of drowning your opponent in a flood of individually-weak arguments in order to prevent rebuttal of the whole argument collection without great effort. The Gish Gallop is a conveyor belt-fed version of the on the spot fallacy, as it's unreasonable for anyone to have a well-composed answer immediately available to every argument present in the Gallop.
And "sealioning?" What's that?
- Sealioning involves jumping into a conversation with endless polite, reasonable questions and demands for answers, usually of entry-level topics far below the actual conversation (e.g. "please prove sexism exists"). This tactic differs little from harassment; instead of discussion, the point is to derail discussion, receive criticism (for their ignorance) so as to look like a victim, or to make someone feel overwhelmed and quit talking.
Who gets to define what is considered asshattery?
- The mod team, of course! If we feel that comments are out of line, are trolling, are leading up to a fight or "just asking questions", we are going to remove them and most likely ban the offender.
FAQ - Sub Questions
Posting Guidelines for Stepparents
- Body text is required, we suggest you use line breaks between paragraphs as a wall of text is difficult to read. Posts that have only a title are likely to be removed. Instead of using names (even fictitious ones), try to use the sub acronyms. It helps our users to follow along if you use the acronyms and not names.
- Assign a post flair that accurately describes what your post is about and what you are seeking. If you are posting an update from a previous post, include a link to that post.
- Flairs are applied to posts to determine what a person is looking for. When submitting a new post, you should choose a flair that specifies if you are looking for advice, support, etc. The following link flair is available and is color coded with side bar links so that you can search by flair:
- Advice - For when you are specifically asking for advice or help.
- Announcement - Mod Use Only, for subreddit announcements.
- Daily (Formerly TTP) - Mod Use Only, for our daily discussion threads.
- Discussion - A little advice, a little "How does your family handle this?"
- JustBMThings - Pretty sure this is self explanatory!
- Legal - Asking for legal advice? Tag it with this!
- Miscellany - Just a sort of off topic thing? Use this tag.
- Resource - Sharing a good resource or asking for one? This is the tag you need!
- Support - For those days when you want nothing but a good old fashioned cry and some community love.
- Update - Updating us on something that you posted about previously? Use this one!
- Vent - We all need to vent sometimes. Respect the tag as a vent. This isn't how OP talks all day every day.
- Win! - Celebrate those wins with us with this tag!
- Megathread - Mod Use Only, for large mega threads (typically around major calendar events.)
Posting Guidelines for Bioparents
- Stepparents is a support community for stepparents, by stepparents. As bioparents, you may want to have more insight into how the stepparent in your life feels or thinks. You may have questions on how to ease the transition for your partner. However, please keep in mind that this community was not created for you. It was created for your partner or your ex's partner. If you are seeking support on how to deal with a stepparent, there are other subs more suited for your situation and your post is subject to removal.
- There are some posts from bioparents we will accept:
- Seeking advice on how to support your partner as they navigate stepparenting
- Seeking resources to help you better support your partner
- Seeking resources for your partner
- There are some posts from bioparents we will not accept:
- Complaints about how the stepparent is too involved in your kids lives
- Vents about how the stepparent is not involved enough in your kids lives
- "Cautionary tales" advising stepparents to back off
- Seeking advice on how to tell the stepparent to back off
- The Do's and Dont's of Stepparenting
- How your kid's stepmom is literally The Worst
- Comments from bioparents that are helpful and supportive are welcome and appreciated. Comments from bioparents that are not helpful or supportive are not welcome and subject to removal. There are several other subs that may meet the needs of bioparents better than we can. We recommend /coparenting, /parenting, /parents, /blendedfamilies, and /singleparents as starting points.
Guidelines for Stepkids
- At this time, we do not generally accept posts from stepkids. Comments from stepkids that are helpful and supportive are welcome and appreciated. Comments from stepkids that are not helpful or supportive are not welcome and subject to removal. If you are a stepkid seeking support, we highly recommend /stepkids. It is a very supportive community specifically for stepkids. We also recommend /blendedfamilies as another potential group for support.
What the heck are all these acronyms? I'm confused!
- Check out the Common Acronyms wiki page. We try to keep this updated as new terms are introduced to the sub.
Why aren't my posts or comments showing up?
- New posters and accounts go through a waiting period before their posts will show in the sub and the comments on posts automatically. During the new account approval period the mod team will check posts to be sure you aren't attempting to circumvent a ban with a shiny new account. Please be patient while the timer runs down on your "new" status and the mod team approves your posts and responses.
Why was my comment removed?
- Comments are removed when they do not follow the rules of the sub. These rules are published in several places for your reading pleasure.
- Comments are removed at moderator discretion. In some cases your comment may be removed while another remains up. If you find this to be the case, and you believe the comment to be violating the rules, instead of arguing with mods or demanding they remove the additional comments, just report it.
This comment/post is really offensive! Why is it still up?
- All moderators are volunteers and have busy real lives. Sometimes things get past us. The best thing you can do is report anything you find offensive or inflammatory. It's the quickest and most reliable way of alerting us to an issue.
I've received a hurtful/unwanted PM from someone about my recent post. What should I do?
- If you receive an unwanted/hurtful PM from a name you don't recognize, please report it to Reddit Admins using our handy pre-populated form. Be sure to include the permalink to the message. We've been dealing with a few unhappy folks who like to attack stepparents, and reporting it to the admins is the only way to make it stop.
What are the general moderator guidelines?
- Users are expected to know the rules before posting. If you are warned or banned for violating the rules, ignorance is not an excuse.
- Moderators will remove posts and comments and/or lock threads in accordance with the rules above. Typically this happens when threads have gone off-topic in a way that is not productive for the OP, or comments overall have become contentious or disrespectful.
- If a poster continues to argue or to willfully violate these rules, temporary and permanent ban procedures will be followed. Any attempts to avoid or bypass temporary bans will result in a permanent ban. User bans will not be discussed in the sub. Questions posted about user bans are subject to removal and the poster subject to warning/ban procedures. The mod team will not discuss a specific user ban with anyone other than the user involved.
- New accounts are subject to manual approval until they are no longer deemed "new" by the mod team. This helps to weed out trolls and ban evaders.
- We rely on Automoderator to scan for specific words and phrases that are not welcome here and notify the mod team to review the comment or post. This includes slurs of any type and platitudes such as "Love them as your own!"
- The mod team uses a combination of blacklisting and banning when dealing with trolls.
- We employ the use of a bot that automatically bans anyone who comments in subs that have historically harassed our users. If you are picked up by the bot for telling trolls to get fucked, reach out via mod mail and we'll get you sorted out.
- The rules above as well as ban procedures are considered guidelines only; some deviation may be necessary on a case by case basis and/or at the mod team's discretion.
I've been wrongly banned/Why can't I comment here?
- Due to an influx of harassment from users with specific user histories, we have employed a user history ban bot as described above. If you think this has affected you and wish to appeal, please message the mods.
Why was I banned without warning?
- There are numerous reasons that the mod team might opt to move perm banning without warning. Message the moderators if you have specific questions.
2024.05.19 11:56 Stage-Piercing727 Best Carhartt Hunting Jackets
 | submitted by Stage-Piercing727 to u/Stage-Piercing727 [link] [comments] https://preview.redd.it/g0ervckfvc1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=332a465217c6840edca4608ea5a3c76258383f8e Welcome to our Carhartt Hunting Jacket roundup. Whether you're an avid hunter or just starting out, finding the perfect jacket to keep you warm and comfortable during your hunting trips is crucial. Today, we bring to you a selection of top-quality Carhartt Hunting Jackets that are not only stylish but also designed for durability and peak performance. Read on to find the perfect jacket that suits your hunting preferences and style. In this article, we'll explore the key features, performance benefits, and customer reviews of the best Carhartt Hunting Jackets available in the market today. As you delve deeper into our review, you'll discover the perfect jacket that not only complements your hunting outfits but also enhances your overall hunting experience. Stay tuned to uncover the best Carhartt Hunting Jackets and make the most of your hunting adventures! The Top 19 Best Carhartt Hunting Jackets
Reviews🔗Camo Insulated Rugged Flex Men's Jacket: Comfort, Durability & Mossy Oak Patternhttps://preview.redd.it/lqwwde0gvc1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3bf382b76ec9dd3560e9e10a00dcf6289ff1a360 My Carhartt Men's Rugged Flex Duck Camo Active Jacket has been a game-changer in my hunting adventures. I've been using it for the past three hunting seasons, and it's been nothing short of amazing. The first thing that caught my attention was its durability; it's held up against some harsh weather conditions. The Rugged Flex stretch technology and elbow pleats allow for easy movement, which is crucial when I'm tracking down my prey. One of the most impressive features is the DWR finish that provides excellent water resistance. It's kept me dry even during unexpected downpours. The Mossy Oak Bottomland camo pattern truly helps me blend in with my surroundings, making it easier to stay hidden from my quarry. However, there are few things that could use some improvement. The loose fit means I sometimes experience a bit of wind coming up, but it's not too much of an issue. Additionally, while the zipper quality is solid, it could be slightly longer, as suggested by other reviewers. Overall, the Carhartt Men's Rugged Flex Duck Camo Active Jacket has been a reliable companion on my hunts, protecting me from the elements and enabling me to focus on the task at hand. If you're in the market for a well-constructed and comfortable hunting jacket, this one should definitely be on your radar. 🔗Carhartt Classic Brown Duck Coat with Corduroy Collarhttps://preview.redd.it/gjelnnkgvc1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=73b08da0c3ef44f85c77311800d674aab16f961a A couple of years ago, I purchased the Carhartt Men's Firm Duck Chore Coat for myself when I was gearing up for a cold and windy construction project. The first thing that stood out to me about this coat was its heritage-inspired design, reminiscent of the pocket watch era. As time went on, I had the opportunity to test its claims of being water-repellent and wind-resistant, and I can confirm that it lived up to my expectations, even in harsh conditions. One significant highlight of the Carhartt Chore Coat is its corduroy collar, which has been in use since the late 1930s and has that classic, timeless look. Additionally, the rugged firm-hand duck fabric not only gives it a sturdy feel but also becomes more comfortable with time, making it a reliable piece of outerwear. As much as I love this coat, it does have a couple of drawbacks. Firstly, the length of the sleeves can be a bit too long for some users, with some having to size down to ensure a comfortable fit. Secondly, the coat's collar could be slightly wider to provide better protection against the wind. In conclusion, the Carhartt Firm Duck Chore Coat is the perfect choice for those who prioritize comfort, warmth, and durability in their outerwear. Its timeless design and high-quality materials make it a worthwhile investment for anyone looking for a reliable coat that will stand the test of time. 🔗Carhartt Rain Defender Fleece Shirt Jackethttps://preview.redd.it/y8kkylqgvc1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0f0b4bb1c92157046e5a7e0cab246597aaed6a50 I recently got my hands on the Carhartt Rain Defender Relaxed Fit Hooded Shirt Jacket in Black Heather and let me tell you, it's been a game-changer in my daily life. As an avid outdoorsman, I appreciate the flexibility of this jacket - it's suitable for various weather conditions. One thing that really stood out for me was the adjustable hood, which ensures good visibility even during a downpour. The high collar also provides additional protection against the elements. Another highlight is its durability. The Windfighter fleece, combined with the Rain Defender finish, makes it wind and water-resistant, while its triple-stitched main seams add extra strength. Notably, there are ample pockets for all my essentials. However, there's one issue I encountered with the hood design. It can feel awkward if worn with a cap, though a beanie or hard hat doesn't pose the same problem. In terms of sizing, I found that the medium size fits perfectly, providing enough room for layering without compromising on comfort. The length of this jacket is another praiseworthy feature - it's just right, even without the 'tall' version. Lastly, while it's not technically a winter jacket, I believe that with some insulation, it could be the perfect companion in winter. Overall, the Carhartt Rain Defender is a reliable go-to for various weather conditions, offering comfort, durability, and functionality. 🔗Carhartt Men's Lightweight Hooded Jackethttps://preview.redd.it/kbt1283hvc1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=df1a27058b1649184cd8236dbe7fe5f04200a9ed I recently got my hands on the Carhartt Super Dux Relaxed Fit Lightweight Mock-Neck Jacket and I must say, I'm quite impressed. The jacket provides excellent protection against wind and light rain, making it perfect for those chilly days when you're outdoors. It's a great piece to layer up with during mild winters. One of the standout features of this jacket is its flexibility. Thanks to the Rugged Flex stretch technology, I can move freely without any hindrance - whether I'm running errands or engaging in some physical activity. The wind-resistant fabric ensures that my body stays warm even when there's a chill in the air. However, there's one drawback that I've noticed - the collar. It feels a bit too large and tends to get in the way while turning my head. It would be great if Carhartt could address this issue in future models. In terms of pocket storage, this jacket delivers as well. There are several secure zipper pockets both inside and outside, allowing me to safely stow away my essentials like tools or supplies. Overall, the Carhartt Super Dux Relaxed Fit Lightweight Mock-Neck Jacket has become a staple in my daily outdoor wear. Its lightweight design, coupled with its wind and water resistance, make it a practical choice for anyone who spends time outdoors. Despite the minor issue with the collar, I'm highly satisfied with this jacket. 🔗Carhartt Realtreed Xtra Camo Sherpa Lined Active Jackethttps://preview.redd.it/qo0me0ohvc1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=119c6715543338880779bc3fcf9bb6e35bebc6c9 Carhartt's Men's Super Dux Relaxed Fit Sherpa-Lined Camo Active Jacket is a warm and durable piece of outerwear that's perfect for hunters and outdoor enthusiasts alike. I recently purchased one in Mossy Oak Bottomland Camo, and I must say, it has quickly become my go-to jacket for all my outdoor adventures. The first thing that struck me was the quality of this jacket. The 18.1-ounce, 97% nylon/3% elastane fabric feels sturdy and well-made, offering excellent wind resistance and a sprinkle of light rain protection. The Sherpa lining inside is incredibly soft and cozy, keeping me warm even on the chilliest days. One aspect I particularly love about this jacket is its spacious interior pocket. It comfortably holds my essentials without weighing me down or restricting my movement. The secure zipper left chest pocket is another useful feature, providing an easy-to-access spot for my phone and keys while I'm out and about. However, there are a few minor drawbacks to the Carhartt Men's Super Dux Jacket that I think are worth mentioning. Firstly, the adjustable hood with a hidden drawcord and cord lock is a nice touch for safety, but I've found that it can be a bit difficult to adjust while wearing gloves. Secondly, the lack of elbow or armpit gussets means that the jacket doesn't always move with me as smoothly as I'd like, especially when reaching or lifting objects. Despite these small issues, I'm overall very satisfied with my Carhartt Men's Super Dux Relaxed Fit Sherpa-Lined Camo Active Jacket. Its comfort, durability, and practical features make it a standout choice for anyone who spends a lot of time outdoors. 🔗Carhartt Washed Duck Insulated Active Jackethttps://preview.redd.it/4bdckzxhvc1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=36a6bbe7e0c8d9b493a04c4249b5b155cca4c5fb As someone who spends a lot of time outdoors, I have to say that the Carhartt Men's Washed Duck Insulated Active Jacket has been a game-changer for me. I've had this jacket for several months now and it has held up incredibly well. What stands out the most to me about this jacket is the heavyweight cotton duck fabric. It's not only warm and durable, but it also has a nice, broken-in feel to it that makes it super comfortable to wear. The 3M Thinsulate insulation adds an extra layer of warmth without making the jacket too bulky or heavy. One feature I really appreciate is the attached hood with low profile adjustment. On windy days, this hood helps keep me protected and warm. Plus, the cord locks make it easy to adjust the fit without having to deal with annoying drawstrings. Another positive aspect of this jacket is the updated lower front pockets. They're now lined with brushed tricot, which makes them feel much softer and more comfortable against my skin. And when I'm out working in the cold, I love how the pen stall in the right, lower front pocket lets me keep all my essentials close at hand. However, there is one aspect of this jacket that could use some improvement - the side pockets. They could definitely be deeper, as they don't provide enough room for storing larger items like smartphones or wallets when you're on the move. Overall, the Carhartt Men's Washed Duck Insulated Active Jacket is a fantastic choice for anyone looking for a reliable, comfortable, and stylish cold weather jacket. The durability and thoughtful design features make it well worth the investment, and I can't recommend it highly enough. 🔗Carhartt Super Dux Insulated Jacket for Menhttps://preview.redd.it/a8870zgivc1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e730e82932cb7e639a5ab1bf179935b5175c57ce The Carhartt Men's Super Dux Relaxed Fit Insulated Jacket was my go-to for those chilly days. On my latest project in the backyard, the wind was relentless and the rain was coming down hard, but this jacket held its own. The 100-gram Thinsulate insulation kept me toasty and the Rain Defender technology ensured I stayed dry. One of my favorite features was the Rugged Flex technology that allowed for unrestricted movement. The bi-swing shoulders and flexible elbows made reaching up high or bending over a much easier task. I never felt trapped in the jacket, even when I was getting really active. The hood was also a game-changer, able to protect my head not only from the rain but also from the wind. Plus, the detachable feature was super convenient - I could remove it on warmer days or when I needed to interact with someone face-to-face. However, I noticed that the interior storm cuffs were loose and didn't keep out the draft as well as I'd like. And while the length was perfect for my needs, it might not suit everyone. Despite these issues, the jacket's high-quality construction, impressive warmth, and rugged design made it a reliable addition to my wardrobe for those harsh conditions. 🔗Carhartt Men's Yukon Extremes Insulated Active Jacket - Blackhttps://preview.redd.it/dgjxdyqivc1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=38aea4fb9e9855187f660b64af25d37d392586f3 Recently, I purchased the Carhartt Men's Yukon Extremes Insulated Active Jacket, and I'm quite satisfied with its performance. As someone who spends a lot of time outdoors, it's important for me to have a jacket that's not only durable but also well-insulated and wind-resistant. This active jacket did not disappoint. The first thing that caught my attention when I received the jacket was the 3M Thinsulate insulation, which provides excellent warmth without feeling too bulky. I'm particularly fond of the hood design, featuring a drawcord and reflective Carhartt patch. The hood not only keeps me protected from rain and snow but also ensures visibility during nighttime activities. However, one area where the jacket could be improved is its zipper quality. While the plastic zipper works fine, I'm more accustomed to metal zippers, which are generally more reliable and durable. In addition, the jacket can be somewhat noisy when walking due to the swishy fabric sound - not ideal for hunting purposes. Despite these minor drawbacks, I believe the Carhartt Men's Yukon Extremes Insulated Active Jacket is a fantastic choice for anyone looking for a reliable and well-insulated winter coat. Its attractive design, variety of pockets, and comfortable fit make it a versatile option for both recreational activities and daily life. Overall, I'm pleased with my purchase and believe many others will be too. 🔗Carhartt Youth Canvas Insulated Hooded Jacket - Mossy Oak Country DNAhttps://preview.redd.it/h1pq5j6jvc1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a97cea9c48e41af642305cb09c6436c6033c7afd I don't know about you, but I'm a big fan of Carhartt - especially their Camo line. That's why I decided to get this Canvas Insulated Hooded Jacket for my son. Let me tell you, it has been a game changer this hunting season! First off, the quality is top-notch. This jacket is made with heavy-duty canvas and features triple-stitched seams. Even after several washes, it still looks brand new. The quilted flannel lining on the inside also ensures that my boy stays warm and comfortable no matter how cold it is outside. One of my favorite features of this jacket is the hidden rib-knit cuffs. They keep his wrists toasty and make sure no wind or sleet sneaks in. Plus, the insulated front pockets are perfect for storing his hands or keeping small gear close at hand while he's out in the field. Now, let's talk about the hood. It's full zip, so it provides ample protection against rain, snow, or even those pesky mosquitoes during summer months. And speaking of zipping, the main zipper is high quality and doesn't get stuck or catch on the fabric. While the jacket isn't water-resistant, it does dry relatively quickly when hung up, making it easy to clean and maintain. The only downside I've noticed is that the sleeve length could be a bit longer, especially if your child is taller than average. Overall, I'm extremely satisfied with this Camo Canvas Insulated Hooded Jacket from Carhartt. It has everything a young hunter could want - durability, comfort, and style. If you're looking for a reliable and well-made jacket for your little outdoorsman (or outdoorswoman), look no further than this one. 🔗Carhartt Gilliam Insulated Jackethttps://preview.redd.it/nkwzggnjvc1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8ac560b72162b731e103f7cc19c56e940946dfda I recently got my hands on the Carhartt Men's Black Gilliam Jacket and oh boy, it's been a game-changer for my daily life! This insulated jacket is not just about keeping you warm during winter, but also about providing you with some real protection from unwanted dampness. The DWR finish ensures that you stay dry and comfortable even when the weather takes a turn. One thing I truly appreciate is the zipper closure feature. It's a small detail, yet it does an excellent job of keeping out the cold winds. Speaking of features, it comes with heaps of pockets - some even have protective closures. This means you can carry all your small work essentials without worrying about losing them. Now, let's talk about the cons. Though I'm not usually bothered by minor issues, I must say the length of the sleeves could be a bit longer. It may not be a problem for everyone, but it did catch my eye. All in all, the Gilliam Jacket has definitely earned a place in my wardrobe. Its water-repellent capabilities, the myriad of pockets, and the overall comfort it provides make it the perfect companion for these colder days. So if you're looking for a reliable work jacket that doesn't compromise on style or functionality, this one's a solid choice! 🔗Carhartt Men's Full Swing Steel Jacket in Blackhttps://preview.redd.it/ed4oog2kvc1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c64e5eca091121737bcf3d52378aee0819058f35 I've been using this Carhartt Men's Full Swing Steel Jacket for a while now, and I must say, it's been a reliable companion through the colder months. Its 3M Thinsulate insulation keeps me warm and cozy even during the harshest winters, and the DWR finish makes sure I stay dry even when caught in a rainstorm. One of my favorite features is the detachable hood. It gives me personalized styling options depending on my mood or weather conditions. The jacket's rugged construction is also worth highlighting, as it's made of stretch ripstop for extra flexibility and freedom of movement. However, I've experienced some issues with the zipper quality. It can sometimes get stuck or hang at every little wrinkle, which can be quite frustrating. Another minor issue is the sizing, as the jacket tends to run on the smaller side, but that's easily fixed by choosing a size larger than usual. All in all, I'm quite satisfied with the Carhartt Men's Full Swing Steel Jacket. Its combination of style, comfort, and functionality makes it an excellent choice for anyone looking for a versatile and reliable winter jacket. 🔗Carhartt Men's Super Dux Traditional Insulated Coat (Black) - Relaxed Fit, Machine Washhttps://preview.redd.it/or65m7dkvc1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=223f52063a4f689bc57b66eea80b81090db51c79 I recently purchased the Carhartt Super Dux Relaxed Fit Insulated Traditional Coat to stay warm during those chilly winter days. The coat's 7.75-ounce nylon fabric is treated with Rain Defender durable water-repellent finish, ensuring that I stay dry even in heavy rain. Additionally, the Wind Fighter technology effectively blocks the wind, keeping me cozy and comfortable. One of my favorite features of this coat is the quilt-lined insulation with 100g of 3M Thinsulate, providing excellent warmth. The secure hook-and-loop right chest pocket and zipper left chest pocket are perfect for storing my essentials, while the two snap front lower pockets with side entry hand warmers keep my hands toasty. The interior hook-and-look pocket on the wearer's left side offers additional storage space. I also appreciate the drop-tail hem, which provides extra coverage, and the adjustable hood with chin guard and hidden drawstrings, which protect me from harsh weather conditions. The rib-knit storm cuffs effectively seal out the cold, and the center-front zipper with kissing welt makes it easy for me to put on and take off the coat. However, there are a few downsides to this coat. The side seam zippers, while providing added movement, can be a bit challenging to use at times. Additionally, the double-stitched main seam, although durable, can feel a bit stiff and may require some breaking in. In conclusion, the Carhartt Super Dux Relaxed Fit Insulated Traditional Coat is an excellent choice for those looking for a reliable and warm coat for winter. Its unique combination of features, such as the 7.75-ounce nylon fabric with Rain Defender technology, Wind Fighter technology, and 100g of 3M Thinsulate insulation, ensures that you stay dry and warm in even the harshest weather conditions. Although there are a few minor drawbacks, such as the stiffness of the double-stitched main seam and the occasional difficulty in using the side seam zippers, these issues do not significantly detract from the overall quality and performance of the coat. Overall, I am highly satisfied with my purchase and would recommend this coat to anyone looking for a high-quality winter garment. 🔗Black Men's Rough Cut Jacket by Carhartthttps://preview.redd.it/czaf3k2lvc1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=bcc3b43f556beb9649b5c230cd8000bbf290a97c Carhartt's men's Rough Cut Jacket, in black, is perfect for those chilly autumn days. This heavyweight flannel piece, with a sherpa fleece lining in its body and a quilted lining on the sleeves, offers both warmth and style. The original-fit shirt-jac features handwarmer pockets and zippered ones ideal for storing your wallet or keys. If you're an outdoor enthusiast, this jacket can withstand the elements, and after years of use, you'd be hard pressed to find any significant wear and tear on it. Although it's designed primarily for breathability and not as a standalone layer for keeping warm, it pairs beautifully with fleece or down mid-layers. However, despite its high rating, the jacket does have a few minor drawbacks. The first is that the zipper tends to get stuck, particularly near the neck area, often requiring fiddling for a few minutes. Some users also mentioned they found the arms to be slightly short, as well as the jacket being slightly stiff when new. But these issues seem to be more common with the first batch, with newer models appearing to have resolved these concerns. In conclusion, the Carhartt men's Rough Cut Jacket is a high-quality, stylish option that provides warmth and comfort while maintaining a sleek appearance. Its wind resistance and pairing ability with other layers make it an ideal choice for fall and winter outings. And although the stiffness and the issue with the zipper might be present initially, they seem to resolve with time and use. Therefore, I would recommend this jacket to anyone seeking a reliable, durable option for their outdoor activities. Buyer's GuideCarhartt Hunting Jackets are designed to provide durability, comfort, and functionality during hunting trips. In this guide, we'll cover important features, considerations, and advice for choosing the right Carhartt Hunting Jacket to suit your specific needs.Important Featureshttps://preview.redd.it/5o6ft62ovc1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6dc9ed3b6ae9d42a3da3ad1ea62358b68c8ddccf
Considerations
General Advice
https://preview.redd.it/7asmrrjovc1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f8b7ca5d673766bbd0235a9ad0ff65f44df71cae FAQWhich Carhartt hunting jacket is the most popular?The Carhartt Quilted Flannel Lined Jacket is one of the most popular and highly-rated hunting jackets due to its comfort, durability, and warmth.How do I choose the right size for a Carhartt hunting jacket?https://preview.redd.it/75vbmv0pvc1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0296c971fcb78c44618c1a3ad12bf645e3163691 To find the perfect fit, consult Carhartt's sizing chart on their website. Measure your chest, waist, and hips, and choose a jacket that matches your measurements. It's also advisable to read customer reviews for specific size recommendations. What features make Carhartt hunting jackets stand out?
Can I wash my Carhartt hunting jacket in a washing machine?Yes, most Carhartt hunting jackets are designed for machine washing. Use cold water and mild detergent, then hang to dry or tumble dry low. Be sure to check the care instructions included with your specific jacket for more detailed guidance. https://preview.redd.it/yt55kqdpvc1d1.jpg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8cc4223c087bd9454cb24145a683241b8ad131be How waterproof are Carhartt hunting jackets?Many Carhartt hunting jackets are water-resistant, which means they can withstand light rain or snow. If you need a more waterproof option, look for jackets with waterproof membranes or coatings, such as the Carhartt Rain Defender Jacket.Do Carhartt hunting jackets come with a warranty?Carhartt offers a one-year limited warranty against defects in materials and workmanship for most of their products, including hunting jackets. To make a claim, contact their customer service team with the details of your issue and the product's model/Serial Number.How can I tell if a Carhartt hunting jacket is genuine?Look for the Carhartt label and logo on the jacket, as well as the product tag with the style number indicating the specific model and color. Be cautious when purchasing second-hand, as counterfeit jackets may be sold online. If in doubt, contact Carhartt's customer service for assistance.How do I care for my Carhartt hunting jacket to extend its longevity?
Are there specific models of Carhartt hunting jackets suitable for women?Yes, Carhartt offers hunting jackets designed specifically for women, like the Carhartt Women's Big & Tall Quilted Flannel Lined Jacket. These jackets feature a tailored fit and adjustability options to ensure a comfortable and flattering fit for women wearing these jackets while hunting.How can I find discounted Carhartt hunting jackets?Keep an eye on Carhartt's official website and authorized retailers for seasonal sales and promotions. Additionally, you may find discounted hunting jackets on sites like eBay or Amazon, but make sure to verify the authenticity of the product before purchasing.As an Amazon™ Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases. |
2024.05.19 11:50 wapreck 5 Mistake that Car buyers do!
There are some points that I noticed some car buyers do when purchasing their new car! Some of these things I have personally experienced myself!
There is also one point about Petrol/Diesel, but I’ll cover that another day. I know these opinions can be subjective, and you might not agree with me, which is okay. Instead, we can have a healthy discussion in the comment section.
submitted by wapreck to CarsIndia [link] [comments]
1: Sunroof
I know it totally depends on taste, and frankly, a sunroof is okay, but a panoramic sunroof is not. India is a hot climate country, and while a mini sunroof heats the cabin a bit, a panoramic sunroof doubles it to boiling point. If parked under the sun, even with the curtain on, the AC has to work twice as hard, and your fuel efficiency goes for tank. Some pros and cons of panoramic sunroof2: Black Color
Black color is nice and all, but it isn’t cheap to maintain (scratches are easily visible). It takes all your time and money to keep it shining. I know PPF will help, but again, you are spending more. Plus, another point is heat. It absorbs a lot of heat, and the cabin gets very hot. Again, the AC needs to work twice as hard, and fuel efficiency suffers. (I have a black car) Just don’t go with Black because another person also brought it.3: Extended Warranty and Accessories
There is no need to buy hefty price accessories from showroom that too basic one. Should Avoid! them at all costs. Many people don’t know that there is a vast difference between factory warranty and extended warranty, as covered in this article. Extended warranty never covers your whole car compared to factory warranty. You can also buy an extended warranty on the last day of the factory warranty's expiration by just paying an extra Rs 1000 (Hyundai). I don’t think it’s beneficial to pay upfront for something that starts after 3 years. On the last day, judge for yourself whether you really need it. If you have low running, you don’t need it. (Most of buyer never claim extended warranty)4: Buying Top Model only!
Who’s buying the Nexon for 19L and the Creta for 25L? Those are some overpriced models. The top model doesn’t always mean the best; even the 2nd and 3rd top models can fulfill your needs. Buy a car model based on your needs, not desires, because you already chosen the right car that meets all your requirements. You can save money for other things like accessories and more.5: SUV only!
People are buying tall hatchbacks in the name of SUVs. You should reconsider your decision. Today, hatchbacks come with good ground clearance. For example, the Baleno and i20 have 170mm, while the Punch has 187mm, which is enough. The Baleno and i20 also offer plenty of space, comfort, and features. True SUVs are more like the Scorpio-N.There is also one point about Petrol/Diesel, but I’ll cover that another day. I know these opinions can be subjective, and you might not agree with me, which is okay. Instead, we can have a healthy discussion in the comment section.
2024.05.19 11:47 stl_kiwi 26F wondering what to do in relationship with 27M with girl “friends”??
I (26F) have been seeing my bf (27M) since November & in an official relationship since February. I met him out about a month ago after getting off work he was with his 2 guys friends I met before, girl I met before, & a girl/boy I had never met. He didn’t introduce me but I didn’t think much of it until deciding to go to the next bar he went across the group where the girl/boy mentioned were & asked their input.
A unanimous decision was made for the next bar & my bf ordered the Uber. I figured ok surely the introduction has to be coming but then he walked out of the bar, crowded nevertheless, said girl cut me off & was now behind him. As we walk to find the Uber I introduce myself. It felt embarrassing. The Uber wouldn’t let more than 6 people in so his friend was like whatever I’m going home & she hopped out too..
I opened up the next day, he said that she was a friend he rarely saw & everyone in the friend group had been distancing from her bc she always blacks out when she’s drunk. & that guy he hardly knew so he didn’t see the importance to introduce us. On top of all that, his friend hooked up with her.
This last week he goes to a soccer league, which I thought was the one he had been doing for a couple months now to find out it was a league said girl organized & he agreed to go months ago. My questions infuriated him to a fight as I just thought that would be something you tell your girlfriend (not just bc a girl, or her specifically, but bc it’s something new & ideally fun you are starting)…he said it was such a minuscule part of his day & he was bummed the team wasn’t great & the conversation ended with ok we need more communication.
Two days later, if not the next day he says they’ve been talking about meeting up said girl to do business together. From suddenly not really friends to soccer league & business? I’m confused.
Come to find out tonight, I ask straight up if they’ve hooked up. The answer? Yes.
I know everyone has different boundaries in relationships & he never said I’m not invalid for feeling annoyed/mad/insecure. But wtf? Do I just cut it off now?? Am I going to get over thinking about how he thinks it’s okay to join hobbies, work, go out with people he hooked up with (“over a year ago”)? I know that’s a personal question but like IDK
WWYD? 🥴
submitted by stl_kiwi to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
A unanimous decision was made for the next bar & my bf ordered the Uber. I figured ok surely the introduction has to be coming but then he walked out of the bar, crowded nevertheless, said girl cut me off & was now behind him. As we walk to find the Uber I introduce myself. It felt embarrassing. The Uber wouldn’t let more than 6 people in so his friend was like whatever I’m going home & she hopped out too..
I opened up the next day, he said that she was a friend he rarely saw & everyone in the friend group had been distancing from her bc she always blacks out when she’s drunk. & that guy he hardly knew so he didn’t see the importance to introduce us. On top of all that, his friend hooked up with her.
This last week he goes to a soccer league, which I thought was the one he had been doing for a couple months now to find out it was a league said girl organized & he agreed to go months ago. My questions infuriated him to a fight as I just thought that would be something you tell your girlfriend (not just bc a girl, or her specifically, but bc it’s something new & ideally fun you are starting)…he said it was such a minuscule part of his day & he was bummed the team wasn’t great & the conversation ended with ok we need more communication.
Two days later, if not the next day he says they’ve been talking about meeting up said girl to do business together. From suddenly not really friends to soccer league & business? I’m confused.
Come to find out tonight, I ask straight up if they’ve hooked up. The answer? Yes.
I know everyone has different boundaries in relationships & he never said I’m not invalid for feeling annoyed/mad/insecure. But wtf? Do I just cut it off now?? Am I going to get over thinking about how he thinks it’s okay to join hobbies, work, go out with people he hooked up with (“over a year ago”)? I know that’s a personal question but like IDK
WWYD? 🥴
2024.05.19 11:43 WouldNotEatPeople Rune Sell Exclusion Settings for Mid-Late Game
 | Purpose:
Rune Sell Option
Sell Exclusion SettingsI did my rune exclusion settings by rune slot and their corresponding available main and sub properties primarily because it looked neater this way. Doing it this way also helped to reduce the number of possible substat combination with respect to their main stat - I had used a different setting with similar purpose before, but it was way messier. This configuration uses all 8 settings so please bear with me.Setting 1 to 6; (Will only keep hero and legend runes with SPD or % main stat with 2 or more % sub) • Select all rune set, 6* grade, and legend & hero grade. • Set prefix to yes/no (default) ‣ For main properties; • Setting 1: On slot 1, ATK+ • Setting 2: On slot 2, SPD, HP%, ATK%, DEF% • Setting 3: On slot 3, DEF+ • Setting 4: On slot 4, HP%, ATK%, DEF%, CR, CD • Setting 5: On slot 5, HP+ • Setting 6: On slot 6, HP%, ATK%, DEF%, ACC, RES ‣ For sub properties; • Setting 1-6: Select all percentage subs • Setting 1-6: Leave SPD unticked - will be used in setting 7 • Setting 1: On slot 1, you can't get DEF%, so DEF% is excluded • Setting 3: On slot 3, you can't get ATK%, so ATK% is excluded • By excluding the unavailable subs, you can increase the subs combination to 2 (or more if you want to reduce number of runes). I would still recommend 2 for most players. • Leave the minimum subs to default or customize to your liking. I simply leave it to default since I still roll runes with low base.Setting 1 (Slot 1) - Main: ATK+ Sub: HP%, ATK%, CR, CD, Res, Acc Sub: 2 Prefix: Yes/No Setting 2 (Slot 2) - Main: SPD, HP%, ATK%, DEF% Sub: HP%, ATK%, DEF%, CR, CD, Res, Acc Sub: 2 Prefix: Yes/No Setting 3 (Slot 3) - Main: DEF+ Sub: HP%, DEF%, CR, CD, Res, Acc Sub: 2 Prefix: Yes/No Setting 4 (Slot 4) - Main: HP%, DEF%, ATK%, CR, CD, Sub: HP%, ATK%, DEF%, CR, CD, Res, Acc Sub: 2 Prefix: Yes/No Setting 5 (Slot 5) - Main: HP+ Sub: HP%, ATK%, DEF%, CR, CD, Res, Acc Sub: 2 Prefix: Yes/No Setting 6 (Slot 6) - Main: HP%, ATK%, DEF%, Res, Acc Sub: HP%, ATK%, DEF%, CR, CD, Res, Acc Sub: 2 Prefix: Yes/No Setting 7; (Will keep all runes with SPD sub regardless of main stat except for slot 2 with flat main stat) • As before, select all rune set, 6* grade, and legend & hero grade. • Set prefix to yes/no (default) • Only select SPD substat • Set the sub quantity to 1 sub (default) • Leave the minimum subs to default or customize to your liking. Again, I simply leave it to default since I still roll runes with low base.Setting 7 - Sub: SPD Sub: 1 Prefix: Yes/No Setting 8; (Will keep all legend runes with SPD main stat regardless of substat, mainly for reapp target) • Select all rune set, 6* grade, and only legend grade - If you are in the late game, you can also select lesser rune sets that you would consider reapping to further reduce number of runes. • Set prefix to yes if you are only looking for reapp targets for SPD slot 2. If you don't have a lot of SPD runes, just leave it to yes/no (default) • Only select SPD main stat • Select all sub • Set the sub quantity to 1 sub (default). I'll mention it again in case you forgot: I simply leave it to default since I still roll runes with low base.Setting 8 - Main: SPD Sub: All Prefix: Yes End note: In case you haven't noticed xD, I didn't set the minimum substat value for all of the substat since I don't really care about the starting value of the subs. I usually upgrade most of the runes, tricking myself into thinking that they will roll high. I also think that I will be selling too much runes if I were to raise the substat value above the minimum since I am only keeping runes with 2 percentage subs. If anyone is wondering why I had excluded SPD subs from setting 1 to 6, I just wanted to keep runes with SPD sub regardless of other subs as done in setting 7. This means that runes with flat main stat or runes with only SPD sub and 3 flat subs will be kept as long as it had SPD sub in it (except for slot 2 flats that is set to be sold regardless of the exclusion setting). Therefore, setting 1 to 6 can focus on keeping runes with 2 percentage subs or more. Also it may seem redundant when I selected SPD main stat in setting 2 and also in setting 8. Setting 2 helps to keep hero and legend SPD runes with 2 percentage sub while setting 8 will keep all legend SPD runes with innate regardless of the subs for reapp purposes. One of the downside to these settings is that it will sell all runes (legend included) with only one percentage sub. This means that you might miss out on some lucky triples, quads and reapp targets. An unfortunate example would be a legendary CD main stat rune with ATK% as the only percentage sub. If you already have a bunch of reapp targets and typically sell those runes, it's fine I guess. The other shortcoming to these settings is that rune with flat subs will be sold. For example, if you want to maximize the HP of some units, you would typically look for HP+ sub on HP% rune. When using these settings, it is high likely for those type of runes to be sold off. Having a few more setting slots or different configuration might help. If you are using a new setting for the first time, try looking at the runes selected, in case the exclusion settings sell runes that you would consider keeping on your account. If the settings applied sell too much of said runes, it is either: a) I have messed up somewhere b) You might have messed up somewhere c) The setting is unsuitable for your accountI've been using these settings for a while and it gets the job done. But I still check some of the selected runes from time to time just to be sure. I do think that it is pretty ridiculous to have to use 8 exclusion settings just to sell flat slot 2 runes and to keep runes with SPD sub. Go ahead if you need it though. Also, if anyone could think of improvements to these settings, or want to share their settings with similar purpose, I'd appreciate it. |
2024.05.19 11:42 AFrostNova Can a language's writing system affect its native speakers memory?
I was recently having a debate with a friend. He is a native speaker of mandarin & cantonese, and while I am a native english speaker. The essence of our discussion was whether or not character based languages innately improve a speakers memory vs alphabet based languages?
Their argument (for) was that this was the same topics such as the argument with Japanese blue v Green & perception. Language you learn affects the way your brain operates, so it is by itself a possible claim. Expanding on this, the number of characters you need to know for fluently engaging in society is significantly larger than the number of letters you need to know. He argued that if you forget a word you can sound it out & guess the meaning from its root and prefixes/affixed. He additionally brought up memorizing stroke order (but my counter there, that stroke order is fairly consistent across characters & intuitiveh
I argued against, as we don't read words one letter at a time anyway. It is remembering whole words, and to that end his own argument (remembering root words, prefixes, etc.) not only makes it comparable to mandarin, but in my opinion the Chinese radical system actually makes it easier to guess the meaning of a new character (at least in traditional) compared to english. Additionally I think the comparison to the "blue/green" studies is unfair - this feels to be a better example of nature v nurture. Does something about being a character based language speaker improve your memory, or does the fact that their (in china) education system emphasis memorization (poetry recitation, etc) lead to it.
That is a huge oversimplification of our discussion it was multiple hours. But the gist is, is there something about chinese & other character based languages that make their speakers better at remembering things?
submitted by AFrostNova to NoStupidQuestions [link] [comments]
Their argument (for) was that this was the same topics such as the argument with Japanese blue v Green & perception. Language you learn affects the way your brain operates, so it is by itself a possible claim. Expanding on this, the number of characters you need to know for fluently engaging in society is significantly larger than the number of letters you need to know. He argued that if you forget a word you can sound it out & guess the meaning from its root and prefixes/affixed. He additionally brought up memorizing stroke order (but my counter there, that stroke order is fairly consistent across characters & intuitiveh
I argued against, as we don't read words one letter at a time anyway. It is remembering whole words, and to that end his own argument (remembering root words, prefixes, etc.) not only makes it comparable to mandarin, but in my opinion the Chinese radical system actually makes it easier to guess the meaning of a new character (at least in traditional) compared to english. Additionally I think the comparison to the "blue/green" studies is unfair - this feels to be a better example of nature v nurture. Does something about being a character based language speaker improve your memory, or does the fact that their (in china) education system emphasis memorization (poetry recitation, etc) lead to it.
That is a huge oversimplification of our discussion it was multiple hours. But the gist is, is there something about chinese & other character based languages that make their speakers better at remembering things?
2024.05.19 11:22 Sh_TRoman Discover the Ultimate CSS Guide on Our Website!
CSS stands for Cascading Style Sheets, is a fundamental technology used in web development to control the presentation and layout of HTML documents. While HTML provides the structure of a webpage, CSS enhances its appearance by defining how HTML elements should be displayed on the screen, in print, or even as speech.
In order to understand the basic of CSS, we need to understand how it works. CSS works by selecting HTML elements using id, classess attributes or tags itself and applying styling rules to them. These rules dictate attributes such as color, size, font, spacing, and positioning. By separating content from presentation, CSS allows developers to create visually appealing and consistent designs across multiple web pages with ease.
CSS operates on a cascade principle, where multiple style rules can be applied to the same element, with specificity and order determining which rule takes precedence. This enables developers to efficiently manage styles across complex projects. CSS is one of the foundation in order to enhance the web development skills.
Over the years, CSS has evolved significantly, with new features and capabilities continually being added. CSS preprocessors like Sass and LESS have extended CSS’s functionality by introducing variables, mixins, and other programming constructs, making stylesheets more maintainable and scalable.
Furthermore, with the rise of responsive web design, CSS plays a crucial role in creating layouts that adapt to different screen sizes and devices, providing users with an optimal viewing experience across desktops, tablets, and smartphones.
Understanding of Cascading Style Sheet (CSS)
CSS properties are the building blocks that developers use to style HTML elements. These properties allow developers to control various aspects of an element’s appearance, layout, and behavior. Here are some commonly used CSS properties grouped by their functionalities:
Read the Guide Here: https://leafyweb.com/home/project/brief-introduction-to-css/
submitted by Sh_TRoman to u/Sh_TRoman [link] [comments]
In order to understand the basic of CSS, we need to understand how it works. CSS works by selecting HTML elements using id, classess attributes or tags itself and applying styling rules to them. These rules dictate attributes such as color, size, font, spacing, and positioning. By separating content from presentation, CSS allows developers to create visually appealing and consistent designs across multiple web pages with ease.
CSS operates on a cascade principle, where multiple style rules can be applied to the same element, with specificity and order determining which rule takes precedence. This enables developers to efficiently manage styles across complex projects. CSS is one of the foundation in order to enhance the web development skills.
Over the years, CSS has evolved significantly, with new features and capabilities continually being added. CSS preprocessors like Sass and LESS have extended CSS’s functionality by introducing variables, mixins, and other programming constructs, making stylesheets more maintainable and scalable.
Furthermore, with the rise of responsive web design, CSS plays a crucial role in creating layouts that adapt to different screen sizes and devices, providing users with an optimal viewing experience across desktops, tablets, and smartphones.
Understanding of Cascading Style Sheet (CSS)
- Selection of HTML Elements: CSS employs various selectors to target specific HTML elements or groups of elements. Selectors can be based on element type (e.g., for paragraphs), class (e.g., .header), ID (e.g., #main-content), or other attributes like data attributes or pseudo-classes (e.g., :hover for styling when the mouse is over an element). This flexibility allows developers to precisely target elements for styling.
- Application of Styling Rules: Once an element is selected, CSS applies styling rules to it. These rules define how the element should appear and behave. CSS properties cover a wide range of design aspects, including:Color: Specifies the foreground and background colors.Size: Controls the dimensions of the element, such as width, height, padding, and margins.Font: Determines the typeface, size, style (e.g., bold, italic), and other text properties.Spacing: Manages the spacing between elements, including margins, padding, and borders.Positioning: Controls the placement of elements on the webpage, including static, relative, absolute, and fixed positioning.
- Separation of Content and Presentation: One of the core principles of CSS is separating content from presentation. HTML defines the structure and content of a webpage, while CSS handles the presentation and layout. This separation allows developers to make changes to the design without altering the underlying content, making it easier to maintain and update websites.
- Creating Visually Appealing Designs: CSS enables developers to unleash their creativity and design visually stunning websites. With CSS, developers can customize every aspect of the webpage’s appearance, from colors and typography to layout and animations. This flexibility empowers developers to create unique and engaging user experiences tailored to their audience.
- Consistency Across Multiple Pages: By applying CSS rules consistently across multiple web pages, developers can ensure a cohesive and unified design language throughout the website. CSS allows developers to define styles once and apply them universally, saving time and effort while maintaining consistency across the site.
CSS properties are the building blocks that developers use to style HTML elements. These properties allow developers to control various aspects of an element’s appearance, layout, and behavior. Here are some commonly used CSS properties grouped by their functionalities:
- Typography: This properties is used to control the various aspects of the text elements of HTML.font-family: Sets the font of the text.font-size: Sets the size of the text.font-weight: Specifies the thickness of the font.font-style: Defines the style of the font (e.g., italic).text-align: Aligns the text horizontally within its container.line-height: Sets the height of each line of text.
- Color and Background: This properties is used to control the color of any HTML elements like < div >, < span >, < header > etc.color: Defines the color of the text.background-color: Sets the background color of an element.opacity: Specifies the transparency of an element.background-image: Sets an image as the background of an element.background-size: Defines the size of the background image.background-position: Specifies the starting position of the background image.
- Layout: This properties is used to control the how the HTML elements will functions. For example, its display properties or height, or position etc.display: Defines how an element is displayed (e.g., block, inline, flex).width and height: Sets the width and height of an element.margin, padding, and border: Controls the spacing around and within an element.float: Positions an element to the left or right within its container.position: Specifies the positioning method of an element (e.g., static, relative, absolute, fixed).top, bottom, left, right: Sets the position of an element relative to its containing element.
- Box Model: The box model is used to set the HTML elements in box like element by defining its height and width.box-sizing: Defines how the total width and height of an element are calculated.border-radius: Rounds the corners of an element’s border.box-shadow: Adds a shadow effect to an element.overflow: Specifies how content that overflows the element’s box is handled.
- animation: Defines keyframe animations.transition: Specifies the transition effect for a CSS property.transform: Applies transformations (e.g., rotate, scale) to elements.
Read the Guide Here: https://leafyweb.com/home/project/brief-introduction-to-css/
2024.05.19 11:18 PowerMinute1922 The Man who screams at Daybreak
My last flat was unbearable.
I mean, you try having a family of 11 live above you, when half of them are under the age of 8. Also try having a pair of raging alcoholic neighbours on either side of you. A pair who were once married to each other. My eyes rivalled that of pigeons’ due to no sleep.
I lasted a total of 21 days. I know, new record huh? I just about shoved the keys back in the grubby hands of my landlord when I finally saw the lunacy inscribed on his face. No wonder the rent was dirt cheap.
So I was back on the road, not on the streets though. Luckily enough I started questioning the flat by day 8, looked around for another place by day 15, and made a decision to get the hell out on day 18. 3 days of packing and it was bye-bye.
My new place seemed all the better too: yes, the rent was more expensive, and yes, it only has 2 bedrooms. But at least it was a house, one where pesky neighbours were at least 5 metres away. On my right, at least. On my left? Their house - thankfully - couldn’t even be seen where I stood.
Parking my car, I skipped up towards my new house with my fresh set of keys. And on entering? Silence. Perfect still silence. Thank the Lord. I basked in it for a while before returning to my car, unloading some of my baggage. It took 3-4 hauls, but I managed to fit it into one of the bedrooms. Thankfully, the rest of my things were to be brought by moving vans in about an hour.
I envisioned what the house could look like with a few finishing touches.
“But first…”
I eyed the 2 rooms. “Mine!”
The room I had chosen to be mine gave a bright view of my own smaller garden, as well as a portion of my right neighbour’s house, but that didn’t matter much. The view in the other room would suck: just my car and some reeds.
I was just about done heaving some of my baggage into my newly-chosen room when the doorbell gave an obnoxious ring. I stood, fighting the urge to just run away into one of my rooms when it beeped again.
Reaching the door, I eyed out of the peephole to see nothing but an opaque whiteness. I guess the downside in this house is that the last tenant was a slob. I eyed some of the yellowing walls. Sighing, I opened the door.
“Hello! We’re your neighbours, Jack and Sally, and we live just there,” She motioned towards my right, “We came to introduce ourselves, and to let you know that if you ever need anything, we’re right here.”
She then shoved a basket full of biscuits at my chest, a motherly-smile stretched around her lips. She turned to leave, husband - clearly forced to follow her - in tow, when she turned around.
“Your name, dear?”
“Leen!” I shouted after her.
“Perfect.”
And perfect it was, I thought. Neighbours that respect their distance from you, and give you food? I eyed the delicious snacks in front of me. Definitely an upgrade.
Though it was at dawn the very next day that I woke up, shook.
~
See, I was just sleeping in my newly delivered bed when I heard it. Something that sounded like a bird, a huge caw, before it alternated into different pitches. Disoriented, I tried to wipe the sleep from my eyes in order to focus better. But it just made me more confused.
It sounded like a chicken.
As far as I know, this new place was not the countryside, nor farmland. So what? And why?
I stepped up to my window to take a good look outside. I wouldn’t keep a rooster in my home that’s for sure. Whatever it was, it was coming from…
My jaw dropped.
I closed my eyes and scrubbed at them harshly.
Please tell me why I opened my eyes and saw the exact same thing.
A man, on his haunches, face pointed towards the sky, was making rooster noises.
And he was on my neighbours’ garden. The ones I met earlier.
He looked absolutely demented. I wasn’t even scared then, just flabbergasted. I wasted no time calling the police at this disturbing nuisance.
When they arrived though, I saw my neighbours’ shoot straight from their house, speaking or…was it pleading? With the officers. What on Earth..?
Anyway, it was their problem now, so I went back to bed. I had a whole bunch of chores the next day, and had to get it all sorted before I returned to work.
Shutting my eyes, I wished for peace. And quiet, thank you very much.
~
At last, I woke up at 10 AM. By 1 PM, I had sorted my clothing into its respective drawers, and had decorated my bedroom walls, including a new golden addition. And now? I had food cooking on the stove. It felt satisfying, having cleaned up and now awaiting the prize of food.
I scrolled on my phone as I waited for the pasta to cook, before another ding turned my attention towards the door.
“Huh, what now?”
Unfortunately I hadn’t cleaned the peephole yet, so I had to open the door. There stood Jack and Sally. Or Sally and Jack. Jack looked lost. Sally stared deep into my eyes.
“Was it you?”
“Me? What do you mean?”
“That called the police last night?”
I recalled the past night, and gave her a thumbs up, hoping my smile was reassuring. “Yep, don’t worry, that lunatic will not be coming back ever again. He can go to the zoo if he wants to squawk.”
I should’ve taken the cue from Jack’s paling face, but Sally grabbed hold of me. “Listen here, okay? That man, the one you called the police on...” She trembled, “He’s my son! You can’t do that! He was not even on your property!”
My eyes widened. “He’s…your son?”
“Of course! How can you not see that?”
Nodding at her, I relinquished myself from the hold she had on my arms. “Okay then, sorry for the call. But I do have to mention something,” Jack started to shake his head behind his wife, but I ignored the little-to-say man, “Is there any way you can keep the noise down to a minimum? Honestly, your son has vocal cords of steel! It would wake the entire neighbourhood at this rate.”
Sally stared pointedly at me, then took a look around my house. “Very well.”
She grabbed her husband’s arm as she turned to leave, and I caught the slightest look of fear in his eyes before he was abruptly pulled away.
I dismissed it - and the sinking feeling - on discovering my very soft, overcooked pasta when I came back into my home though.
I managed to also do one thing before wrapping up: I cleaned out my door's peephole. Now I wouldn't have to open the door to know it's them. I'd just speak at them from the inside if they were to come back.
~
I woke, jolting out of my bed the very next morning, or night. I checked my bedside clock to see it was 3:50 AM. The cock-a-doodle-doo was breaking into my head. I grasped my hair in frustration, knowing that I didn’t have the madman’s parents phone numbers’ to call, or maybe scream at them. It was the exact same thing as the day before! Except…maybe…
I strained my ear.
It sounded a lot closer.
My hands, for some reason, became clammy instantly, and the urgent thumping of my own heart - the fragility of my own life - became all the more prominent.
I tiptoed to my window and peeked outside. Nothing.
I then slowly treaded to my spare bedroom, and pulled the curtains apart. Zilch. Nada. Though…
Almost as if under a spell, my head turned towards my main door. I…I could somehow feel it. Just to confirm though, I peeked out of the door-hole.
And with a slam, I collapsed in my new, dream home.
~
When I came to, I was lying on white sheets, and a bright white light hung over me.
A hospital.
I was in my own room, which I found odd. It was not like I needed it. But then a doctor walked in, followed by 3 other people, and it all made sense. Everything - blurs and sureness - melted into a perfect picture.
Sally, Jack, and their son.
He couldn’t be more than 17 really. Though he looked 37 a few hours ago. Face pressed against the glass of my peephole, mouth wide open towards it, eyes pointing in different directions as his face reddened and contorted.
I was deaf in one moment. Then came the COCK-A-DOODLE-DOO.
Of course I fainted. Who could blame me?
“Good afternoon, I’m Dr Lam. You’re in A&E right now. Are you able to tell me your full name and date of birth?
My voice answered the Doctor’s questions, but my eyes stared dazed at the youngster’s abdomen, not daring to reachhis its eyes.
“Well, nothing seems to be wrong with you. You may have just been dehydrated. Did you have any headache or pain before you fainted?”
I replied in the negative.
“Luckily, your friends’ son had found you passed out, and ensured your speedy arrival to hospital, so I wouldn’t be worried about any damage.”
My eyes finally strayed, looking towards the ground. I held the nauseousness of bile down my throat. Following a brief check-up, I was allowed to leave.
And 2 people and a demon followed me out.
“Well, Leen, that should give you a lesson,”
Sally.
I turned towards the family, who stood in a 3 person arc. Only 1 managed to look away, equal parts shame and guilt. I don’t need to mention who that was.
“Don’t worry. You can look at me, I don’t bite: not now and not at dawn,” a strained voice whispered at me. “I promise, it’s only at dawn when I…when I…”
“Hush Dean, don’t work your voice that much. You’ll need to save it for later.”
I was still dizzy. That didn’t stop me from running half-hobbled to the taxi stand, where I begged and claimed to many that I would provide double payment if they were to take me to my house.
It took a while, but I managed to pack some of my clothes. There was no way in hell I was sleeping at that damned house again, not now, not ever. I called and booked at a nearby hotel in the meantime.
I was done packing necessities by the evening. Walking out of my house, I saw no sign of those three. I would have been relieved, had I not come face to face with than one thing: standing in my garden, leaning against my car. My breathing picked up instantly.
Dean
It stood with its back resting against my car. And It noticed me immediately. Seems like it was just waiting for me to notice it.
“Are you leaving?” It sounded almost sad, but I needed it to move away, or my only way out of there would be in jeopardy.
“For the night.” My answer? Almost smooth, but even I could hear the first shake in my voice.
It nodded though. “Okay.” And he moved from my car. I counted the distance. 1 metre. 2. 2.5-
It made a sudden dash at me as I - in flight response - ran frantically to the driver’s seat, locking the door. I came in half-squashed, my backpack still on my back. But I didn’t care.
Its face was pressed against the window.
“Mum is waiting for a person that will like me for me, not run away. You’re supposed to like me.” It said, matter-of-factly. It then wailed, and sunk beneath the car window.
I did not dare to sit up and see what it was doing.
I didn’t even need to though. The sound came a split-second later.
COCK-A-DOODLE-DOO
Tears spilled from my eyes. My limbs felt weak. I couldn’t even breathe. It suddenly sprang up to the window. Eyes enlarged: looking at me and everywhere at once.
“I can actually tur-COCK- in the day too, but M-DOODLE- said it would be too much for you,” wheezing, it exclaimed again before adding, “but this is ME. Do you-do you, do you like me?”
With dead limbs I weighed my foot on the pedal, and jump-started the car to speed off. My head shook left-and-right in response, stomach heaving with nausea.
Human preservation kicked me into taking proper control of the car when I saw, out of the rear view mirror, Sally. This time with a rope, which locked around the creature’s neck before she tugged, drawing it into her house. At one point we locked eyes. And what do I mean by we?
Answer: the 2 of them and me.
It was honestly a miracle that I did not get into a road traffic accident.
I spent 3 days living in the hotel after that, my job long-forgotten in the aftermath.
By day 4 I broke down and called my older sister, asking to stay at her place for a while. Her house and area seemed fine the times I’d stopped over. I guess I clearly did not seem right though, as she many-a-time asked me what was wrong. My answer? Stress. She persisted, years of living together as kids helping her figure out my lies, though she ultimately gave up after a week. She knew it was something I didn’t want to share, and that I was safe now. That was enough for her.
For me? I guess at the time I so badly wanted to tell someone. Though it couldn’t be my sister. I didn’t want to cause any trouble. Nor see if she’d even believe me, or instead rank me at the same IQ level as her two 5-year-olds.
For a few weeks, I stayed with my sister and her family, reassuring both her and myself that I was fine. Thankfully, we worked together to find a small apartment. Next to a kids school too - bonus points. I now craved safety above all else. After moving out though, I realised I needed my belongings back.
So, who picked up my stuff from that cursed residence, you ask? The moving people. I called the police from a random phone booth first to head over to that area, emphasising on seeing some suspicious looking men, whilst I got them to collect everything. I did not dare to call the police on that family though. I would prefer if the link between me and them got cut, drawn and quartered.
So now I’m here, in an apartment which thankfully hasn’t shown any sign of insanity. Inspecting my belongings, I noticed that there was one thing missing.
My gold frame, used to encase my make-shift certificate - made by yours truly after her 21-day record from the previous apartment - was gone.
I felt somewhat miffed, but then I realised something.
Something which can maybe bring the light out in this whole situation.
I counted carefully. I broke my record.
With a grand stay of 2 days. Now that - that I don’t think I’d ever be able to beat.
submitted by PowerMinute1922 to nosleep [link] [comments]
I mean, you try having a family of 11 live above you, when half of them are under the age of 8. Also try having a pair of raging alcoholic neighbours on either side of you. A pair who were once married to each other. My eyes rivalled that of pigeons’ due to no sleep.
I lasted a total of 21 days. I know, new record huh? I just about shoved the keys back in the grubby hands of my landlord when I finally saw the lunacy inscribed on his face. No wonder the rent was dirt cheap.
So I was back on the road, not on the streets though. Luckily enough I started questioning the flat by day 8, looked around for another place by day 15, and made a decision to get the hell out on day 18. 3 days of packing and it was bye-bye.
My new place seemed all the better too: yes, the rent was more expensive, and yes, it only has 2 bedrooms. But at least it was a house, one where pesky neighbours were at least 5 metres away. On my right, at least. On my left? Their house - thankfully - couldn’t even be seen where I stood.
Parking my car, I skipped up towards my new house with my fresh set of keys. And on entering? Silence. Perfect still silence. Thank the Lord. I basked in it for a while before returning to my car, unloading some of my baggage. It took 3-4 hauls, but I managed to fit it into one of the bedrooms. Thankfully, the rest of my things were to be brought by moving vans in about an hour.
I envisioned what the house could look like with a few finishing touches.
“But first…”
I eyed the 2 rooms. “Mine!”
The room I had chosen to be mine gave a bright view of my own smaller garden, as well as a portion of my right neighbour’s house, but that didn’t matter much. The view in the other room would suck: just my car and some reeds.
I was just about done heaving some of my baggage into my newly-chosen room when the doorbell gave an obnoxious ring. I stood, fighting the urge to just run away into one of my rooms when it beeped again.
Reaching the door, I eyed out of the peephole to see nothing but an opaque whiteness. I guess the downside in this house is that the last tenant was a slob. I eyed some of the yellowing walls. Sighing, I opened the door.
“Hello! We’re your neighbours, Jack and Sally, and we live just there,” She motioned towards my right, “We came to introduce ourselves, and to let you know that if you ever need anything, we’re right here.”
She then shoved a basket full of biscuits at my chest, a motherly-smile stretched around her lips. She turned to leave, husband - clearly forced to follow her - in tow, when she turned around.
“Your name, dear?”
“Leen!” I shouted after her.
“Perfect.”
And perfect it was, I thought. Neighbours that respect their distance from you, and give you food? I eyed the delicious snacks in front of me. Definitely an upgrade.
Though it was at dawn the very next day that I woke up, shook.
~
See, I was just sleeping in my newly delivered bed when I heard it. Something that sounded like a bird, a huge caw, before it alternated into different pitches. Disoriented, I tried to wipe the sleep from my eyes in order to focus better. But it just made me more confused.
It sounded like a chicken.
As far as I know, this new place was not the countryside, nor farmland. So what? And why?
I stepped up to my window to take a good look outside. I wouldn’t keep a rooster in my home that’s for sure. Whatever it was, it was coming from…
My jaw dropped.
I closed my eyes and scrubbed at them harshly.
Please tell me why I opened my eyes and saw the exact same thing.
A man, on his haunches, face pointed towards the sky, was making rooster noises.
And he was on my neighbours’ garden. The ones I met earlier.
He looked absolutely demented. I wasn’t even scared then, just flabbergasted. I wasted no time calling the police at this disturbing nuisance.
When they arrived though, I saw my neighbours’ shoot straight from their house, speaking or…was it pleading? With the officers. What on Earth..?
Anyway, it was their problem now, so I went back to bed. I had a whole bunch of chores the next day, and had to get it all sorted before I returned to work.
Shutting my eyes, I wished for peace. And quiet, thank you very much.
~
At last, I woke up at 10 AM. By 1 PM, I had sorted my clothing into its respective drawers, and had decorated my bedroom walls, including a new golden addition. And now? I had food cooking on the stove. It felt satisfying, having cleaned up and now awaiting the prize of food.
I scrolled on my phone as I waited for the pasta to cook, before another ding turned my attention towards the door.
“Huh, what now?”
Unfortunately I hadn’t cleaned the peephole yet, so I had to open the door. There stood Jack and Sally. Or Sally and Jack. Jack looked lost. Sally stared deep into my eyes.
“Was it you?”
“Me? What do you mean?”
“That called the police last night?”
I recalled the past night, and gave her a thumbs up, hoping my smile was reassuring. “Yep, don’t worry, that lunatic will not be coming back ever again. He can go to the zoo if he wants to squawk.”
I should’ve taken the cue from Jack’s paling face, but Sally grabbed hold of me. “Listen here, okay? That man, the one you called the police on...” She trembled, “He’s my son! You can’t do that! He was not even on your property!”
My eyes widened. “He’s…your son?”
“Of course! How can you not see that?”
Nodding at her, I relinquished myself from the hold she had on my arms. “Okay then, sorry for the call. But I do have to mention something,” Jack started to shake his head behind his wife, but I ignored the little-to-say man, “Is there any way you can keep the noise down to a minimum? Honestly, your son has vocal cords of steel! It would wake the entire neighbourhood at this rate.”
Sally stared pointedly at me, then took a look around my house. “Very well.”
She grabbed her husband’s arm as she turned to leave, and I caught the slightest look of fear in his eyes before he was abruptly pulled away.
I dismissed it - and the sinking feeling - on discovering my very soft, overcooked pasta when I came back into my home though.
I managed to also do one thing before wrapping up: I cleaned out my door's peephole. Now I wouldn't have to open the door to know it's them. I'd just speak at them from the inside if they were to come back.
~
I woke, jolting out of my bed the very next morning, or night. I checked my bedside clock to see it was 3:50 AM. The cock-a-doodle-doo was breaking into my head. I grasped my hair in frustration, knowing that I didn’t have the madman’s parents phone numbers’ to call, or maybe scream at them. It was the exact same thing as the day before! Except…maybe…
I strained my ear.
It sounded a lot closer.
My hands, for some reason, became clammy instantly, and the urgent thumping of my own heart - the fragility of my own life - became all the more prominent.
I tiptoed to my window and peeked outside. Nothing.
I then slowly treaded to my spare bedroom, and pulled the curtains apart. Zilch. Nada. Though…
Almost as if under a spell, my head turned towards my main door. I…I could somehow feel it. Just to confirm though, I peeked out of the door-hole.
And with a slam, I collapsed in my new, dream home.
~
When I came to, I was lying on white sheets, and a bright white light hung over me.
A hospital.
I was in my own room, which I found odd. It was not like I needed it. But then a doctor walked in, followed by 3 other people, and it all made sense. Everything - blurs and sureness - melted into a perfect picture.
Sally, Jack, and their son.
He couldn’t be more than 17 really. Though he looked 37 a few hours ago. Face pressed against the glass of my peephole, mouth wide open towards it, eyes pointing in different directions as his face reddened and contorted.
I was deaf in one moment. Then came the COCK-A-DOODLE-DOO.
Of course I fainted. Who could blame me?
“Good afternoon, I’m Dr Lam. You’re in A&E right now. Are you able to tell me your full name and date of birth?
My voice answered the Doctor’s questions, but my eyes stared dazed at the youngster’s abdomen, not daring to reach
“Well, nothing seems to be wrong with you. You may have just been dehydrated. Did you have any headache or pain before you fainted?”
I replied in the negative.
“Luckily, your friends’ son had found you passed out, and ensured your speedy arrival to hospital, so I wouldn’t be worried about any damage.”
My eyes finally strayed, looking towards the ground. I held the nauseousness of bile down my throat. Following a brief check-up, I was allowed to leave.
And 2 people and a demon followed me out.
“Well, Leen, that should give you a lesson,”
Sally.
I turned towards the family, who stood in a 3 person arc. Only 1 managed to look away, equal parts shame and guilt. I don’t need to mention who that was.
“Don’t worry. You can look at me, I don’t bite: not now and not at dawn,” a strained voice whispered at me. “I promise, it’s only at dawn when I…when I…”
“Hush Dean, don’t work your voice that much. You’ll need to save it for later.”
I was still dizzy. That didn’t stop me from running half-hobbled to the taxi stand, where I begged and claimed to many that I would provide double payment if they were to take me to my house.
It took a while, but I managed to pack some of my clothes. There was no way in hell I was sleeping at that damned house again, not now, not ever. I called and booked at a nearby hotel in the meantime.
I was done packing necessities by the evening. Walking out of my house, I saw no sign of those three. I would have been relieved, had I not come face to face with than one thing: standing in my garden, leaning against my car. My breathing picked up instantly.
Dean
It stood with its back resting against my car. And It noticed me immediately. Seems like it was just waiting for me to notice it.
“Are you leaving?” It sounded almost sad, but I needed it to move away, or my only way out of there would be in jeopardy.
“For the night.” My answer? Almost smooth, but even I could hear the first shake in my voice.
It nodded though. “Okay.” And he moved from my car. I counted the distance. 1 metre. 2. 2.5-
It made a sudden dash at me as I - in flight response - ran frantically to the driver’s seat, locking the door. I came in half-squashed, my backpack still on my back. But I didn’t care.
Its face was pressed against the window.
“Mum is waiting for a person that will like me for me, not run away. You’re supposed to like me.” It said, matter-of-factly. It then wailed, and sunk beneath the car window.
I did not dare to sit up and see what it was doing.
I didn’t even need to though. The sound came a split-second later.
COCK-A-DOODLE-DOO
Tears spilled from my eyes. My limbs felt weak. I couldn’t even breathe. It suddenly sprang up to the window. Eyes enlarged: looking at me and everywhere at once.
“I can actually tur-COCK- in the day too, but M-DOODLE- said it would be too much for you,” wheezing, it exclaimed again before adding, “but this is ME. Do you-do you, do you like me?”
With dead limbs I weighed my foot on the pedal, and jump-started the car to speed off. My head shook left-and-right in response, stomach heaving with nausea.
Human preservation kicked me into taking proper control of the car when I saw, out of the rear view mirror, Sally. This time with a rope, which locked around the creature’s neck before she tugged, drawing it into her house. At one point we locked eyes. And what do I mean by we?
Answer: the 2 of them and me.
It was honestly a miracle that I did not get into a road traffic accident.
By day 4 I broke down and called my older sister, asking to stay at her place for a while. Her house and area seemed fine the times I’d stopped over. I guess I clearly did not seem right though, as she many-a-time asked me what was wrong. My answer? Stress. She persisted, years of living together as kids helping her figure out my lies, though she ultimately gave up after a week. She knew it was something I didn’t want to share, and that I was safe now. That was enough for her.
For me? I guess at the time I so badly wanted to tell someone. Though it couldn’t be my sister. I didn’t want to cause any trouble. Nor see if she’d even believe me, or instead rank me at the same IQ level as her two 5-year-olds.
For a few weeks, I stayed with my sister and her family, reassuring both her and myself that I was fine. Thankfully, we worked together to find a small apartment. Next to a kids school too - bonus points. I now craved safety above all else. After moving out though, I realised I needed my belongings back.
So, who picked up my stuff from that cursed residence, you ask? The moving people. I called the police from a random phone booth first to head over to that area, emphasising on seeing some suspicious looking men, whilst I got them to collect everything. I did not dare to call the police on that family though. I would prefer if the link between me and them got cut, drawn and quartered.
So now I’m here, in an apartment which thankfully hasn’t shown any sign of insanity. Inspecting my belongings, I noticed that there was one thing missing.
My gold frame, used to encase my make-shift certificate - made by yours truly after her 21-day record from the previous apartment - was gone.
I felt somewhat miffed, but then I realised something.
Something which can maybe bring the light out in this whole situation.
I counted carefully. I broke my record.
With a grand stay of 2 days. Now that - that I don’t think I’d ever be able to beat.
2024.05.19 11:13 crackersandcheese224 21 [M4F] #East of England - What did the hat say to the scarf?
You hang here, I’ll go on ahead!
Hi everyone! Hope you’re all doing well!
About me:
A slim, somewhat feminine, 21 year old guy from the east of England, standing at 5 foot 8 inches, who works full time and is studying for a masters degree alongside working (please send help). Relatively short light brown hair, white skin, greenish eyes and like dressing in smart clothes.
I am a homebody, through and through, spending cosy time indoors is what makes me tick and is how I spend a lot of my time. Whether that be digging into a long gaming session, relaxing with a good book, cooking up a storm (or maybe a tornado depending on the aftermath I leave behind) in the kitchen, watching a good film or tv show, or enjoying a nap, my home is my happy place.
That being said, I enjoy spending time in nature as much as the next person, and love going out for walks, exploring new restaurants or taking long drives.
I’m not a very social person, finding socialising in large groups rather stressful, however I do enjoy spending time with others, often one on one works best for me. I also have a short social battery, so need alone time as well. In my mission to find my person, I also hope to find someone with whom I can spend limitless amounts of time, someone who simply feels like home.
I’m a hopeless romantic too, and believe in finding “the one” someday, which, I suppose, is why I’m here! I adore affection in all forms, and all the various love languages hold some standing with me, though physical affection would likely be top dog if I’m honest.
My overall demeanour is sweet, well meaning, soft and often a little excitable (which can ramp up in lots of situations). I’ve been likened to a puppy by friends before.
As a partner:
As a partner I am someone who delights in caring for my person, being there to help them with the little things which make things just that tiny bit easier - Making them food after a long day, listening to them when they need to vent, treating them when they need it (and sometimes when they don’t 😅). A big part of a relationship for me is spending quality time together, whether that be doing something together, for example watching tv or cooking a recipe, or spending time together whilst doing our own thing. I want to be able to be with my person and be entirely comfortable and content in their presence. I’m also very affectionate as mentioned above, and will want to give you cuddles at just about every minute of the day 😅
I’m a good listener, and love to learn about other people and ask questions to dig deeper into the way they feel about things etc. I also value this greatly in another person.
Other facts/points of interest:
I prefer to converse over text initially, and tend to write rather a lot when I like somebody (and when the effort is reciprocated), then move onto other mediums down the line.
I am open to sharing pictures of myself right off the bat (as long as you do the same).
I believe that I have autism, and so somebody who understands this and appreciates that some things are difficult for me would be ideal.
About you:
Some traits I value in a partner are as follows, now, this is by no means an exhaustive list, nor is it a list of requirements, just some things that I adore in others, as well as things that I try to cultivate in myself:
Good listener, good communicator, interested in me, affectionate/caring, well mannered (not impolite), articulate, kind, humble/down to earth.
Otherwise, please just be respectful and put some effort in if you message me.
As a final note, have some conversation starters for if you decide to message me:
What’s the best advice you’ve ever received?
Where is your happy place?
What’s something about you that you think is somewhat embarrassing but really cute?
What, if anything, did you connect with in my post?
Take care, I hope to hear from you!
And last of all, I’m also open to making friends if you’d prefer that :)
submitted by crackersandcheese224 to ForeverAloneDating [link] [comments]
Hi everyone! Hope you’re all doing well!
About me:
A slim, somewhat feminine, 21 year old guy from the east of England, standing at 5 foot 8 inches, who works full time and is studying for a masters degree alongside working (please send help). Relatively short light brown hair, white skin, greenish eyes and like dressing in smart clothes.
I am a homebody, through and through, spending cosy time indoors is what makes me tick and is how I spend a lot of my time. Whether that be digging into a long gaming session, relaxing with a good book, cooking up a storm (or maybe a tornado depending on the aftermath I leave behind) in the kitchen, watching a good film or tv show, or enjoying a nap, my home is my happy place.
That being said, I enjoy spending time in nature as much as the next person, and love going out for walks, exploring new restaurants or taking long drives.
I’m not a very social person, finding socialising in large groups rather stressful, however I do enjoy spending time with others, often one on one works best for me. I also have a short social battery, so need alone time as well. In my mission to find my person, I also hope to find someone with whom I can spend limitless amounts of time, someone who simply feels like home.
I’m a hopeless romantic too, and believe in finding “the one” someday, which, I suppose, is why I’m here! I adore affection in all forms, and all the various love languages hold some standing with me, though physical affection would likely be top dog if I’m honest.
My overall demeanour is sweet, well meaning, soft and often a little excitable (which can ramp up in lots of situations). I’ve been likened to a puppy by friends before.
As a partner:
As a partner I am someone who delights in caring for my person, being there to help them with the little things which make things just that tiny bit easier - Making them food after a long day, listening to them when they need to vent, treating them when they need it (and sometimes when they don’t 😅). A big part of a relationship for me is spending quality time together, whether that be doing something together, for example watching tv or cooking a recipe, or spending time together whilst doing our own thing. I want to be able to be with my person and be entirely comfortable and content in their presence. I’m also very affectionate as mentioned above, and will want to give you cuddles at just about every minute of the day 😅
I’m a good listener, and love to learn about other people and ask questions to dig deeper into the way they feel about things etc. I also value this greatly in another person.
Other facts/points of interest:
I prefer to converse over text initially, and tend to write rather a lot when I like somebody (and when the effort is reciprocated), then move onto other mediums down the line.
I am open to sharing pictures of myself right off the bat (as long as you do the same).
I believe that I have autism, and so somebody who understands this and appreciates that some things are difficult for me would be ideal.
About you:
Some traits I value in a partner are as follows, now, this is by no means an exhaustive list, nor is it a list of requirements, just some things that I adore in others, as well as things that I try to cultivate in myself:
Good listener, good communicator, interested in me, affectionate/caring, well mannered (not impolite), articulate, kind, humble/down to earth.
Otherwise, please just be respectful and put some effort in if you message me.
As a final note, have some conversation starters for if you decide to message me:
What’s the best advice you’ve ever received?
Where is your happy place?
What’s something about you that you think is somewhat embarrassing but really cute?
What, if anything, did you connect with in my post?
Take care, I hope to hear from you!
And last of all, I’m also open to making friends if you’d prefer that :)
2024.05.19 11:08 Healthy-Research-341 Learning Curve of This Game
I decided to try the game again with the DE version and its new dlcs. Even though I've played the game before, I've never taken it as seriously as I do now. I already knew most of the units and races and now I think I learned the basics of competitive play quickly. I completed the game's own challenges with gold medals and studied different openings from Cicero's Interactive Build Order, I think I largely succeeded (I would like to thank him here). And for the first time I also got used to playing entirely with keyboard shortcuts. For now, I only play the game on land maps, generally in Arabia. But I guess it feels like I'm stuck somewhere on the learning curve. I know this is an old game and has a very solid player base, and I have a few questions for experienced players.
1. In Arabia, when I make fast castle opening with 25-26 vils against players at my level, I usually win if I can get through the opening. Or sometimes I finish the game early with scouts or archer rush with 21p feudal. But how can a generally safer opening be like? What kind of opening is generally preferred at higher level?
2. How can I recover my economy if something goes wrong at the beginning? For example sometimes while trying to defend myself from early rushes (or while I'm doing one) for not to lose workers (or for trying to win feudal battles), I may use more resources than necessary and go out of the order completely. What should I do in this situation?
3. I sometimes have difficulty controlling both the economy and my troops at the same time. How can I get better at this? Or is this a ability acquired over time ?
4. I haven't been able to beat the hardest AI yet without using any cheesy tactics. If I can't finish him off at the opening, I lose the game little by little every time. Does anyone have any suggestions for beating the AI mid-game in a fair match? Also, I feel like I remember making it in The Conquerors when I was a kid. Is AI far better now?
Thank you in advance
submitted by Healthy-Research-341 to aoe2 [link] [comments]
1. In Arabia, when I make fast castle opening with 25-26 vils against players at my level, I usually win if I can get through the opening. Or sometimes I finish the game early with scouts or archer rush with 21p feudal. But how can a generally safer opening be like? What kind of opening is generally preferred at higher level?
2. How can I recover my economy if something goes wrong at the beginning? For example sometimes while trying to defend myself from early rushes (or while I'm doing one) for not to lose workers (or for trying to win feudal battles), I may use more resources than necessary and go out of the order completely. What should I do in this situation?
3. I sometimes have difficulty controlling both the economy and my troops at the same time. How can I get better at this? Or is this a ability acquired over time ?
4. I haven't been able to beat the hardest AI yet without using any cheesy tactics. If I can't finish him off at the opening, I lose the game little by little every time. Does anyone have any suggestions for beating the AI mid-game in a fair match? Also, I feel like I remember making it in The Conquerors when I was a kid. Is AI far better now?
Thank you in advance