11/20/2017
Log book of Det. Ryan Snow
Case #2798: The Appalachian Murders
The past couple of days are events I pray no one else ever has to go through what Kate and I had. I had her and Mr. Raines cleared of all charges, having found the proof we all needed to end this case and find the true killer. Kate no longer has to go into witness protection and I had given the police a good enough lie to keep myself from looking insane in the eyes of my co-workers. I know no one will ever know the true story or believe it, but I’m writing it out here. It at least needs to be known written somewhere. Even if my and Kate’s eyes are the only ones that will ever read it written out and forever imprinted in our memories.
The morning Kate had run off to the mountains on her own, I had made my way to the Blackwell home where I was immediately met with Mr. Blackwell charging at me and wrapping his large hands around my neck. He was shaking me and blaming me for getting his daughter killed and not doing more to keep her safe. The police who had been called to examine the scene and read Kate’s letter had to sedate Mr. Blackwell to get him off of me, lying him down on the couch, his head resting on Mrs. Blackwell’s legs. Though the woman was distraught and begging the police to bring her daughter back, she still took the time to shoot that cold, death glare my way. The ice in my chest growing. I couldn’t tell these people that this thing had come after me to get to Kate. I knew it wouldn’t change anything. If anything they’d hate me even more for keeping it to myself.
The sheriff was there and he pulled me away from eye sight of the Blackwells, trying to tell me that this wasn’t my fault. But I couldn’t help but blame myself. I should have done everything I could to keep Kate as far from those mountains as possible.
There were no signs of a struggle in Kate’s room and the letter was definitely written in her hand writing. Her father’s rifle missing from the study, a backpack and some food and supplies gone as well. She had only grabbed one set of clothes from her drawers, showing she did indeed have plans on returning after only one night in the mountains to confront whoever or whatever the killer was.
I told the sheriff to keep any police from going up to the mountains without first allowing me to go up there first to find Kate. He of course argued, telling me that he couldn’t break protocol based on any hunches I may have had. However, I told him that I could get Kate back without her putting up much of a fight, whereas she may struggle with a group of cops who didn’t understand the situation she was in. I was close enough to this case to have built a trust with her after all. I was mentioned in her letter about ending this case for me.
It took a good hour to get the sheriff to eye the Blackwells, Mr. Blackwell beginning to stir from his sleep, and allow me to go to the mountains to find Kate. He didn’t bother to call off the search to the police that had already begun making their way to the mountains, but did radio to tell them to not try getting Kate home without first allowing me to speak to her. He then gave me twenty-four hours to find her to which I told him I’d only need at most ten.
Without telling him about the disturbing scratches on my car, I sped to the mountains, taking the same path Kate had that day she took her friends on their trip. The route, as the sun began to rise was scenic. A drive that may have been a sign of a bright future ahead with a beautiful week in the mountains of nothing but nature, was now a reddening sky of horror. I couldn’t understand how Kate felt, going down the same roads that led to her only friends’ fates to avenge them, but the feeling of guilt did weigh heavy on my chest as I saw the signs of the Appalachian Mountain trails grow bigger on the horizon. Guilt for not doing more to prove Kate was innocent, for allowing Mrs. Mayfield for getting killed right before my very eyes, and for Liam for not being lucky enough to save him.
When I finally arrived to the cabin, there didn’t seem to be any change since the first day I was called to the crime scene, the only thing out of place being Mr. Blackwell’s truck parked precariously near the cabin. The police tape was still up, the cars of Kate and Mr. Woolfe still left where they were, the tires still slashed, the door wide open from when Kate, Ms. Greymoore, and Mr. Woolfe ran out of the cabin upon Mr. Billings was killed by an unknown force. All the bodies had been found and were now being prepared by their families to be buried or cremated. Only one body of the five still roaming around to avenge each and every one of their deaths.
I called out for Kate as I made my way into the cabin. The Ouija board was still on the coffee table, the white line of where Mr. Billings had been found lying face first on the floor with his head bashed open remained on the spot. The planchette was still missing. I kept calling out for Kate as I made my way up to the attic, the door left unlocked, using my flashlight to shine down on the white outline where Mr. Steele had been found completely torn apart. To think Kate had done such a thing, I now realize made me look like a complete dumb ass for believing it.
When I couldn’t find Kate in the cabin, I made my way out the cabin, still calling for her. I called out to her, promising that she just needed to come back home with me and we could solve the murders together. I knew it was a lie and that the sheriff would immediately have her take away to some secluded place where the killer couldn’t find her, but it was all I could think of to try luring her out to meet me. Still, she never appeared.
The sun was soon beginning to set as I tried retracing the very steps Kate and Ms. Greymoore had taken to outrun the killer. I had passed the small shrine of flowers and the pictures of Mr. Woolfe where the boy had been found, his face permanently remaining nineteen forever in the photos of him with Kate and their friends. I kept going, trying my best to follow the same path to the cliff where Ms. Greymoore was found, calling for Kate along the way.
It wasn’t until I found the place Kate had buried her best friend that I found Kate. She was on her knees before the rock where she left her bloody handprint, sniffing as her head was lowered, her dad’s rifle in her hands.
“Ms. Blackwell-“ I began as I took a step toward her. I was immediately cut off as Kate jumped to her feet, raising her father’s rifle at my head. I jolted back, raising my hands up to show her I meant no harm to her. “Ms. Blackwell, it’s me, Det. Snow!”
“Detective…?” She gasped, slightly lowering the rifle, but keeping it on me. “P-Prove it!”
“I’m sorry?” I asked, raising an eyebrow.
“I… I thought I saw Sonja…” Kate breathed between tears, the rifle shaking in her hands, “it… It was wearing her face… It had her voice… How… H-How do I know you’re really Det. Snow?”
“You… Saw Sonja?” I asked as gently as I could with a terrified woman pointing a gun my way. “She spoke to you?”
“Prove you’re Det. Snow!” Kate demanded as she stilled her arms, readying the rifle as she pointed straight between my eyes.
“Alright! Alright!” I kept my hands up, backing up slightly as I tried thinking of how I could prove to her I was really me. “I… I, ah… I have… Had a brother… We went to get ice cream together once and… I dropped a dime and went to grab it… I was five… I followed it out to the road and despite how trafficked it was, I didn’t get hit. I grabbed the dime just as a truck was speeding my way and it swerved just before hitting me… Seeing how close I was to death, I dropped the dime and it rolled into the sewer. My brother called me Lucky Dime since then… Saying the dime was lost to me because it did its job in protecting me… I haven’t seen my brother since I was seven and I haven’t spoken to my parents in…” I looked at my watch. “Five years… No one else calls me Lucky Dime… Not even the people at the station know that was my nickname.”
With this, Kate lowered the rifle, her eyes softening from her furious fear to a more melancholy terror. She looked to Ms. Greymoore’s grave marker, her hand print just barely visible In the approaching darkness.
“It… It looked just… Like her…” She sniffed, “it had her voice… Why did it have her voice… Why did it look like her…?”
“Ms. Blackwell,” I soothed, relaxing now that there was no weapon in my face, “we need to head back, your parents are worried about you and the police are looking for-“
“I can’t go back yet!” She snapped at me as she spun to look at me, tears in her eyes. “That thing is still out there and will kill again unless I end it!” She held up her dad’s rifle as if to show me how she meant to “end it.” “I’m not leaving until I end that… Thing that had the balls to wear Sonja’s face and have her voice!”
“Ms. Blackwell, we will catch the killer, I promise, but right now, we need to get you home before your dad ends up killing a police officer for keeping him from looking for you.”
“I told him in my letter I’d be back tomorrow! I’m twenty-years-old, he can’t force me back home if I don’t want to! I just want to stop this thing before it-“
A howling in the distance cut Kate off. Coyote from what I could hear. If I couldn’t get Kate home, I’d have to get her somewhere safe. I turned to begin talking her down and taking her to one of the other two cabins for shelter. However, when I looked back at her, her face had turned to a bone chilling terror I’d never seen on a person before. She looked like hunted prey that had been found by its predator. She gripped her dad’s rifle to her chest tightly, her hand reaching for the trigger.
“Ms. Blackwell, it’s just a pack of coyote,” I tried telling her calmly, “let’s get to one of the other cabins and-“
“No, no, no,” She stopped me as she stepped back, looking around for where the howling was coming from, “I… Heard that same howling just before I saw Sonja! I thought it was far away, but she… She was right in front of me… She… Something was off, but it looked just like her!”
“Ms. Blackwell, you didn’t see Sonja,” I assured her, “I don’t know what you think you saw, but it wasn’t-“
“Lucky… Dime…”
I froze. My blood turned to ice. The fear on Kate’s face grew as she began backing away, her back hitting the grave marker. I spun around to see a figure in the darkness limp toward us, a scratched and garbled familiar voice coming from it.
“Lucky… Dime…” It wheezed, “You brought her… Back… Give her… To me…”
I whipped out my gun, pointing it at this thing that had his voice. I stepped back to stand directly between this thing and Kate.
“Stay back!” I demanded. “Don’t come any closer!”
“Lucky… Di-“
“Shut up! Stop calling me that! Who are you? Not another step or I’ll shoot!”
The thing stopped limping toward us, its body shuddering in place as it stared us down. I took the safety off of my Glock, ready to blow this thing’s head off if it got any closer or even dared using that voice on me again.
“Kate…” It turned its attention to Kate, a completely different voice coming from it, another male’s voice. “Kate… I’m cold…”
“J-Jasper…” Kate began to sob, “Please, stop using their voices… Please stop!”
“Kate… Kate why did… Did you leave me…?” Another male voice asked. “I… I was in so much… Pain…”
“Shut up!” Kate cried out.
“I thought we… Were friends… Kate…” A female voice. “You said you… Loved me… Why won’t… You let me have… Your warmth…?”
“I said shut up!” Kate screamed as she pointed her rifle and shooting at the creature. She had missed, but the thing still let out an ear piercing shriek as it dodged out of the way of the bullets Kate was shooting. It ran off into the darkness, but Kate kept pulling the trigger of her rifle.
“Stop!” I shouted as I snatched the barrel of her rifle, shoving it to the ground before us. “It’s gone, you scared it off, get to the cabins, I’m right here with you!”
I began shoving Kate back toward where the cabins were, the sounds of that thing screaming out in a symphony of different voices ringing out throughout the woods. I shoved Kate into the first cabin we had arrived to, Cabin #1 I could only assume as I slammed the door shut behind us. It smelled God awful, like the smell of the corpse I found on my first murder case, and it was getting darker as the sun began to sink behind the trees outside.
“Detective, it smell terrible in here!” Kate cried out, covering her mouth and nose, but the tears still falling from her eyes were still visible as they rolled down her cheeks.
I pulled her close and kept her behind me as I took my gun and flashlight out. “Stay close to me,” I ordered, leading the way through the cabin, “do not run off or use that rifle without may say so, understood?”
Kate didn’t answer, but I could feel the heat from her body following after me as I made my toward the smell. It was getting worse as we inched closer to a closet door in a hallway that connected the living room to the kitchen. The door was locked, but after a couple of kicks I was able to get the door to swing open, the smell blasting us in our faces making us gag and nearly throw up on the floor. I fumbled around the sides inside the room to find a light switch that I was able to find to the side of the entryway. A yellow light flickered on, revealing the door led to a staircase. I led the way down the creaking steps, Kate close by as she kept her mouth covered with her shirt.
Once we had made our way to the bottom, Kate dropped her dad’s rifle and let out a scream as we stared at what was waiting for us at the bottom of the steps. In a large pile at the corner of this basement room were nothing but skin and bones of humans and animals covered in maggots and flies. Some of the human bodies being small and child-like in size. The missing people who were never found after vanishing when they came to Cabin #2.
I grabbed Kate’s rifle off the floor and began pushing her back up the stairs, her screaming and sobbing all the way back up to the cabin. I slammed the door shut behind us and pushed Kate to the front door.
“We need to leave,” I had told her, trying to calm her down as we made it outside, “we need to get you home and away from here as soon as possible.”
“N-No… No!” She began fighting me, trying to escape my grasp on her. “No! That… That thing is still out there! You saw it! You can’t say you don’t believe me now! It even called you Lucky Dime! It said you brought me back!”
“I’m not saying I don’t believe you!” I shot back. “I do, I saw exactly what you saw, but it’s way too dangerous for you to be out here while you’re the one it’s after!”
“I escaped it once, I can do it again!” Kate pointed out as she struggled against me while I tried getting her into my car. “I’m not running away this time, I want to kill it!”
“God damn it, Blackwell, we’ll let the police handle it! Just because you have a weapon doesn’t make you safe or ready to handle something like… Like that… That thing!”
“It killed my friends! It wants me! I’m going straight to it so I can blow its head off! It’ll come right for me!”
“I came here to bring you back home, not let you accomplish some stupid ass revenge plot! Get in the fucking car, unless you want to end up like those bodies down that-“
“D… De… Detect… Detective…”
A scratched and moaning voice cut me off. Kate and I both froze at the sound of something approaching. I turned to see a police officer stagger toward us from the tree line. I could barely tell who he was or who he used to be, his head held low and blue uniform covered in blood.
“H… Hel… Hel… Help… Help me…" It croaked as it stumbled closer.
I held up Kate's rifle. "Stay back!" I barked. "Not another step!"
The thing that stood before us wearing the cop like a full-bodied suit stopped in place. It swayed where it stood, blood water falling from its head and down to its chest.
"It… It… It's inside… Inside me…" It breathed painfully. "I… I can't… Help… Me…" Its voice then changed to that familiar voice that made my skin crawl. "Lucky… Dime… I… I'm so… Hungry… Give her… To… Me…"
I pulled the trigger of the rifle, hitting the creature in the head, the rest of it staggering backward from the blow. Still though, it remained on its feet, turning itself to look toward us once again.
"Give… Her… To… Me…" It wheeze, blood and brain pouring from where I had shot it, it beginning to stumble toward us once again. I continued shooting, hitting it in the shoulder, the arm, the leg, the head again, but it just kept coming toward us faster, demanding I give Kate to it.
I was about ready to ram it with the rifle, having run out of bullets, when a voice off in the distance made the creature freeze just an inch before us.
"I'm here! I'm here!" It called out in an almost sing-songy way, using the voice of a little girl. "I'm here! I'm here!"
"I'm… Here…" The creature repeated as it jerked its body to look to where the voice was coming from. "I'm here… I'm here… I'm here! I'm here! I'm here!" It began shrieking in a high pitch wail. It sounded like a mixture of different voices ranging from child, to woman, to man. Keeping flat on its feet, its upper body fell forward onto its hands before speedily crawling off like a spider.
We stood in shaking silence for a moment, Kate digging her fingers into my arm while I was too numb from shock to care about the pain she was unknowingly inflicting. It wasn’t until the radio from my car buzzed to life that jolted us back to whatever reality was at this point. I scrambled to the driver’s side, swinging the door open as I fell inside to grab the intercom to respond to the voice yelling for me over the receiver.
“Det. Snow, what the hell is going on up there?” The sheriff’s scratched voice called out over the receiver when I could barely get my name out of my mouth.
“Sh-Sh-Sheriff…?” Was all I could respond with, still trying to wrap my head around what I had just seen.
“Y-Y-Yeah,” he responded in mock shudder, “what the hell is going on up there? I’ve tried radioing every man I’ve got up there and am constantly being left on red! Do I need to send back-up?”
“No!” Immediately, I returned to full reality, finally understanding the severity of the moment and putting that knowledge into my tone. “Landon, do not send any more men up here, call everyone back immediately! I don’t know what this thing is, but it’s too dangerous! Call everyone back, we’re heading back to the Blackwell house now!”
“We?” The sheriff questioned, skepticism in his voice.
“I found Ms. Blackwell, she’s here with me.”
I was met with statice before the voice of Mr. Blackwell blasted over the intercom.
“Bring my daughter home, right now, you son of a bitch!” Mr. Blackwell demanded. “You bring her home this instant before I decide to kick your teeth in!”
I opened my mouth to respond, but the radio was snatched from my hand from Kate. “I’m not coming home until I kill this thing!” She snapped into the radio. “I don’t know what it is, but I at least know I’m not crazy and that it needs to die before it kills anyone else!”
I grabbed the radio from Kate’s hand, beginning to tell her off when a agonized scream erupted from the intercom. I dropped the radio to cover my ears as Kate did, the scream piercing from my car to throughout the forest around us. The voice screaming and crying for help sounded male and it seemed to echo all around us.
“GIVE HER TO ME, YOU SON OF A BITCH!” A mix of the screaming voice and Mr. Blackwell’s hissed out after a good five minutes of screaming before the radio short-circuited and puffs of smoke flowed out.
After allowing my ears to adjust to the sudden silence, I grabbed the radio once again and tried calling for the sheriff, for the cops with us in the mountains, for anyone. When I was met with more silence, I slammed the radio back down on the holder and cursed loudly, hitting the wheel as if it were the source of all my problems.
After a moment to take some deep breaths, I told Kate to get in the car as I placed her rifle in the back seat.
“Didn’t you hear me?” she shot back. “I’m not-“
“Damn it, Blackwell, we have no idea what we’re dealing with, it can mimic peoples’ voices, and it just ran off like a fucking black widow!” I snapped, stepping out of the driver’s seat to glare down at her. “The last thing I’m doing to leaving you here alone and I’m not staying here another second until I can wrap my head around what the fuck I just saw! So, you either get yourself killed out here while I try talking you down this hero complex high, or you’re going to do what I say and get in the damn car!”
We stood in heated silence, glaring each other down before Kate huffed and stormed over to the passenger side of my car and slamming the door shut as she climbed in. I jumped in after her and began driving away from this nutty nightmare I had found myself in.
We drove down the trail back to civilization in silence, Kate staring out the window and trying to keep her tearful sniffs quiet. I had finally begun calming down and was starting to feel bad for snapping at her. She had only gone there to avenge her friends by killing that thing that had most likely killed a whole bunch of cops to find her. However, I still couldn’t just let her stay to hunt it and I didn’t want to stay out in those mountains with some kind of creature that could take the form and voice of someone I knew. I still couldn’t understand what is was I had even seen.
“Wendigo,” Kate whispered, breaking the silence in the car first. She had said it as if she had just remembered something important.
“What?”
“A Wendigo,” She repeated, turning to look to me with wide scared eyes, “that’s what that thing is! It’s a Wendigo!”
“Slow down, what’s a Wendigo?”
“It’s… Oh, just forget it! You wouldn’t believe me anyway.”
“Ms. Blackwell, I just saw a cop being used as a puppet and then run off at inhuman speed on all fours; I doubt I’m not going to believe a single word that comes out of your mouth now. What’s a Wendigo?”
Kate eyed me for a moment before releasing some of the tension from her face as she took a deep breath and began explaining to me. “They’re a Native American myth; it’s believed they’re the spirits of people who would lose themselves in the woods and would end up eating other people to satiate their hunger. I think that’s what that thing is. They can mimic the voices of people who died and use it to lure people to them, they can take the form of that person too.”
“Why does it want female hearts?” I asked, not realizing I had yet told her what my mysterious caller kept asking for when they called me.
“It… It wants my heart?” she asked shakily.
I cursed to myself before letting out a frustrated sigh. “I think this thing wants hearts, but it only wants female hearts. Why? I don’t know yet. But the only other person to be found after killing someone in those cabins was found with his partner’s heart missing to which he was blamed for taking out of her. Recently, I’ve been getting calls from some… Thing wanting me to bring you back here so it could take something from you. It would have taken Ms. Greymoore’s, but you hid her well enough that only the police could find her in time. Now, I’ve been getting calls asking for you and to get something from you.”
Kate looked to me in shock before a wave of guilt twisted her face in pain. “I… I’m so, so… So sorry, Detective!” She cried out. “I… I had… I had no idea you were being… Harassed by it! Had I known it wanted me back and was demanding you brought me here, I never… I didn’t… That’s why it said you brought me back! Oh, I’m such an idiot!” She pressed her hands to her face, grabbing at her hair between her fingers and tightening them around her eyes.
“No, no, no, stop, stop that!” I ordered, screeching the car to a halt, having to bring it to a crooked stop so I could stop her from hurting herself. I snatched her arms from her head and pinned them to her lap, tears flooding her face. “It’s my fault for not telling you sooner! I was too focused on trying to solve this case with the most efficient evidence I could, but that just kept me looking to you as a suspect. I should have stopped thinking you were the killer the moment I got that first call. There’s no way any of us could have seen… This coming… Except people who probably already believe in that kind of stuff or don’t stop to assume a more rational explanation like a cult… I’m… I’m sorry. But, I won’t let it take anything from you, not anymore. I’m going to get you home and then I’ll deal with this with the rest of the police department. You don’t have to deal with this thing anymore, it’ll be my burden from now on. You need time to finally get some rest and mourn your friends with your and their families. It’s already fucked your life up enough, I won’t let it go on making it worse.”
I stopped her before she could argue with me with a wave of my hand. “Your friends’ deaths shouldn’t be your burden to handle. I know you want to be the one who kills that thing and do right by them, but that’s not what they would want. They’d want you to remember them and continue living. They know you didn’t do it, so stop blaming yourself and stop acting like you’re the one who has to make it up to them. I will put an end to this die trying, but you need to go home and be with people who are happy you still get to live.”
Kate looked down at her hands that I kept down on her lap before nodding weakly and letting out a broken “okay.”
“Good, now let’s get you home before-“
My words were cut off when the honk of a car barreling toward us echoed through the woods. The headlights were fast approaching and I barely had time to grab the gear shift to put us back in drive as the other vehicle hit us, forcing us back and forth in one violent motion. It took me a moment to check myself to be sure I hadn’t hit my head on anything or got whiplash from the crash before I immediately returned my full attention to Kate who was kneeling over holding her head. I gently grabbed her shoulder and pulled her up to examine her head. It didn’t appear to have been busted and bleeding, but she was holding the front side of her forehead.
“Are you okay?” I asked her, prying her hand away from the spot on her forehead, seeing that it was beginning to bruise. “Can you hear me? Blink twice if you can understand me!”
“I… I’m f-fine…” she mumbled as she looked to her hand to check if there was blood on her palm, “I… I think I just… Hit… Hit the w-window…” She then blinked twice in my direction before looking to the car that had rammed us.
I turned my attention as well to the car to see it was a police van, it’s front crushed into the left of my front. I quickly jumped out my vehicle and stormed to the van, yelling at who ever was driving the van to come out and explain what the hell they were doing.
The driver’s side of the van swung open once I was near enough and a man in an orange jumpsuit climbed out, staring familiar daggers at me. The moment realization set in, my mixed emotions of confusion, frustration, and fear turned to fury.
It was Leighton Raines.
“Jesus, you really are a shitty detective.” Was all he said to me before reaching into the can and retrieving a rifle out from the passenger seat.
[END OF PART 1]
Part 6

​
​
Ground Work - Psico (Original Mix) / Key Cm, BPM 127, 7:18, MP3 17.78 Mb
Ground Work - Silver Sand Man (Original Mix) / Key Ab, BPM 134, 6:56, MP3 16.73 Mb
Ground Work - Tranziente (Original Mix) / Key Fm, BPM 100, 7:29, MP3 18.27 Mb
Grum - Higher State (Original Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 128, 4:07, MP3 9.97 Mb
Gunjack - ACID CITY (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 145, 6:14, MP3 15.21 Mb
Gunjack - ACIDF4K (Original Mix) / Key Fm, BPM 146, 6:10, MP3 15.05 Mb
Gunjack - MDUB9 (Original Mix) / Key Bm, BPM 142, 6:21, MP3 15.52 Mb
Gustavo Bassani - Additive Rhythm (Original Mix) / Key Dbm, BPM 135, 5:45, MP3 13.92 Mb
Gustavo Reinert - I Wanna (Original Mix) / Key Dbm, BPM 130, 4:56, MP3 12.17 Mb
Gustavo Reinert - Paqueta (Original Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 128, 6:00, MP3 14.73 Mb
Hackerbeatz - Find A Way (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 126, 5:05, MP3 12.73 Mb
Hackerbeatz - Woke Up (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 125, 4:40, MP3 11.76 Mb
Haley Maze, Thoré - Reflections (Original Mix) / Key Dbm, BPM 120, 3:22, MP3 8.34 Mb
KBeat - In This Moment (Original Mix) / Key Fm, BPM 134, 5:21, MP3 13.04 Mb
KLBR - Hourglass (Original Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 139, 6:00, MP3 14.64 Mb
KOII - Prisoner (Kanif The Jhatmaster Remix) / Key Fm, BPM 78, 3:36, MP3 9.26 Mb
KREZUS, ØNELY - reset (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 166, 1:50, MP3 4.61 Mb
Kai 5 - No Rules (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 137, 6:18, MP3 15.34 Mb
Kairos Grove, Lake Matisse - Fairytale (Original Mix) / Key A, BPM 120, 2:18, MP3 5.92 Mb
Kalondoly - Focus (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 105, 3:01, MP3 7.45 Mb
Kana - Black Star (Original Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 100, 4:12, MP3 10.16 Mb
Kana - Life (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 107, 5:00, MP3 12.10 Mb
Kana - Love Me (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 100, 5:53, MP3 14.23 Mb
Kana - Stereo Love (Original Mix) / Key E, BPM 110, 4:05, MP3 9.88 Mb
Kangding Ray - Four Intertwined Spirals (Original Mix) / Key Dbm, BPM 136, 6:12, MP3 15.20 Mb
Kangding Ray - Polar (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 140, 6:24, MP3 15.68 Mb
Kareful, LOSTMANE, pale fortress - Sentinel (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 115, 2:20, MP3 5.79 Mb
Kareful, LOSTMANE, pale fortress - Sentinel (slowed) / Key F#m, BPM 101, 2:39, MP3 6.54 Mb
Kareful, LOSTMANE, pale fortress - Sentinel (sped up) / Key Bbm, BPM 126, 2:07, MP3 5.28 Mb
Karin, Drop The Cheese, DJJINA - BUM BUM BUM (Extended Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 130, 3:38, MP3 9.06 Mb
Karin, Drop The Cheese, DJJINA - BUM BUM BUM (Original Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 130, 2:37, MP3 6.63 Mb
Kathy Brown, Bimbo Jones - Dance (The Future Collective Remix Extended) / Key Dbm, BPM 125, 4:21, MP3 10.70 Mb
Kathy Brown, Bimbo Jones - Dance (The Future Collective Remix) / Key Dbm, BPM 125, 2:39, MP3 6.63 Mb
Kaybee, Joey SLVR - Fallen Angels (Extended Mix) / Key Cm, BPM 124, 5:48, MP3 14.05 Mb
Kaydell - Dia y Noche (Original Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 128, 2:41, MP3 6.57 Mb
KeTrab - Acid Domination. (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 150, 6:50, MP3 16.95 Mb
KeTrab - Arsonists ! (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 150, 7:02, MP3 17.46 Mb
KeTrab - Back to Acid (Original Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 150, 6:50, MP3 16.95 Mb
Kemyo - Miks Am (Original Mix) / Key Bbm, BPM 137, 5:07, MP3 12.65 Mb
Ken Silver - Dreams (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 130, 3:21, MP3 8.18 Mb
Kev Wright - The Molecule (Beat Laundry Remix) / Key C, BPM 115, 5:43, MP3 13.83 Mb
Kev Wright - The Molecule (KPAXX Remix) / Key Fm, BPM 123, 6:42, MP3 16.17 Mb
Kev Wright - The Molecule (Original Mix) / Key Cm, BPM 123, 6:54, MP3 16.66 Mb
Kevin Yost - I1 (Yost's Extended Rework) / Key Dm, BPM 124, 9:59, MP3 24.00 Mb
Kevin Yost - T2 (Card Remix Version) / Key Dm, BPM 122, 9:02, MP3 21.75 Mb
Kholiqov - Who You Are (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 105, 2:49, MP3 6.92 Mb
Kidd Evil - Pa Bajo (Original Mix) / Key Fm, BPM 128, 4:04, MP3 10.05 Mb
Kidd Island - Takes Over (Original Mix) / Key Fm, BPM 126, 3:52, MP3 9.62 Mb
Kiesse - Lock Me Free (Extended Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 123, 5:18, MP3 13.04 Mb
Kikko Esse - 4Pm (Original Mix) / Key Cm, BPM 125, 6:10, MP3 15.15 Mb
Kikko Esse - Deep Mind (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 125, 6:43, MP3 16.46 Mb
Kikko Esse - Make It (Original Mix) / Key Fm, BPM 123, 6:22, MP3 15.64 Mb
Kikko Esse - Take It Easy (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 125, 5:58, MP3 14.67 Mb
Kiko, Etienne De Crecy - Superdata (Original Mix) / Key Fm, BPM 124, 6:01, MP3 14.61 Mb
Kiming Dollo - Gorgon town (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 124, 1:54, MP3 4.95 Mb
King G - Glory (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 116, 6:05, MP3 14.85 Mb
King G - Go On (Original Mix) / Key Cm, BPM 115, 5:26, MP3 13.30 Mb
King G, X-Soul RSA - Teamwork feat. X-Soul RSA (Original Mix) / Key F#m, BPM 116, 6:56, MP3 16.89 Mb
Kirill Dark - Hold Me (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 124, 2:41, MP3 6.53 Mb
Kito Jempere - Love Myself But I Can't Make It Love (Album Version) / Key Abm, BPM 159, 1:58, MP3 5.04 Mb
Kito Jempere - Love Myself But I Can't Make It Love (School Band Version) / Key Abm, BPM 159, 1:32, MP3 4.00 Mb
Klaudia Gawlas - Dark Space (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 146, 6:12, MP3 14.99 Mb
KllangBunker - Rescurrection (Original Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 140, 6:00, MP3 14.44 Mb
KllangBunker - Trap (Original Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 142, 5:28, MP3 13.17 Mb
Knox - Too Strong (Instrumental) / Key Em, BPM 124, 7:04, MP3 17.21 Mb
Knox - Too Strong (Original) / Key F#m, BPM 124, 7:04, MP3 17.21 Mb
Kora, Stang - Wasting Time (DCVCV Extended Mix) / Key Bm, BPM 128, 4:51, MP3 11.93 Mb
Korsakow - Here Comes the Sun (Original Mix) / Key Bbm, BPM 127, 7:08, MP3 17.35 Mb
Korsakow - Soul Brother (Original Mix) / Key F#m, BPM 121, 5:41, MP3 13.87 Mb
Krespo - Party (Extended Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 127, 5:19, MP3 12.93 Mb
Krespo - Power (Extended Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 124, 5:12, MP3 12.62 Mb
Kriss Bergasa - Dale Con Perreo (Extended Mix) / Key Bm, BPM 128, 5:18, MP3 12.88 Mb
Krizman Toni - Late Night (Original Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 130, 5:44, MP3 13.98 Mb
Kuss - Stay Like This (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 141, 4:38, MP3 11.38 Mb
L/F/D/M - Chalet (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 135, 4:02, MP3 9.91 Mb
L/F/D/M - China Town (Original Mix) / Key C, BPM 139, 5:59, MP3 14.60 Mb
L/F/D/M - Push (Original Mix) / Key F#m, BPM 126, 4:57, MP3 12.12 Mb
L/F/D/M - Scaredy Cat (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 137, 5:29, MP3 13.41 Mb
LLLIT - Sampler Dub (Lamebot Remix) / Key Gm, BPM 126, 3:55, MP3 10.02 Mb
LUĐØ - Planeta Morado (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 135, 6:01, MP3 14.71 Mb
Lad - Ron Ron (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 138, 6:25, MP3 15.75 Mb
Lamyadon - Bantayan (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 110, 4:27, MP3 10.97 Mb
Larry Ababio - Kinda Loving (Extended Mix) / Key Bbm, BPM 128, 6:02, MP3 14.66 Mb
Laureano Sánchez, Alex Lyng - Cerca Del Mar ft. Dani Barranco ((Canarias)) / Key Cm, BPM 140, 3:05, MP3 7.53 Mb
Laurent Simeca - Feel Good (Original Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 130, 4:57, MP3 12.00 Mb
Laurent Simeca - Feel Good (Radio-Edit) / Key Ebm, BPM 130, 2:55, MP3 7.13 Mb
Lausen - Acid Inhaler (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 133, 4:47, MP3 11.52 Mb
Lausen - Creeper (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 133, 5:28, MP3 13.17 Mb
Lausen - Dry Ray (Original Mix) / Key Bm, BPM 127, 5:14, MP3 12.60 Mb
Lausen - Get In (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 135, 5:59, MP3 14.40 Mb
Lausen - Orange (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 84, 4:59, MP3 11.98 Mb
Lausen - Silver & Black (Original Mix) / Key A, BPM 134, 6:03, MP3 14.54 Mb
Lausen - Slot (Original Mix) / Key Bbm, BPM 137, 5:54, MP3 14.20 Mb
Lausen - Vaporized (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 132, 6:09, MP3 14.78 Mb
Leffingwell - Plastique (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 128, 5:38, MP3 13.82 Mb
Lefrenk - New Groove (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 136, 5:55, MP3 14.45 Mb
Lefrenk - Profundo (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 137, 5:28, MP3 13.34 Mb
Lefrenk - Swing (Original Mix) / Key Bbm, BPM 136, 4:53, MP3 11.94 Mb
Lefrenk - Tesis (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 136, 5:13, MP3 12.74 Mb
Lenn Wated - Pim Pam (Arnau Ariza Extended Remix) / Key Am, BPM 129, 5:27, MP3 13.44 Mb
Lenn Wated - Pim Pam (Arnau Ariza Remix) / Key F#m, BPM 129, 2:59, MP3 7.49 Mb
Lenn Wated - Pim Pam (J.Moral Extended Remix) / Key Fm, BPM 126, 4:19, MP3 10.71 Mb
Lenn Wated - Pim Pam (J.Moral Remix) / Key Fm, BPM 126, 3:24, MP3 8.52 Mb
Lenn Wated - Pim Pam (Jaidek Extended Remix) / Key Bbm, BPM 125, 5:11, MP3 12.79 Mb
Lenn Wated - Pim Pam (Jaidek Remix) / Key Fm, BPM 125, 3:04, MP3 7.72 Mb
Levii, Joseph Feinstein - Let You Go (Extended Mix) / Key Bm, BPM 122, 4:12, MP3 10.48 Mb
Levii, Joseph Feinstein - Let You Go (Original Mix) / Key Bm, BPM 122, 3:14, MP3 8.15 Mb
Lewinsky, EIIVI - Move It (Extended Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 127, 3:52, MP3 9.52 Mb
Lewinsky, EIIVI - Move It (Radio Edit) / Key Gm, BPM 127, 3:23, MP3 8.37 Mb
Linear System - Blue Magic (Original Mix) / Key Bbm, BPM 144, 5:53, MP3 14.27 Mb
Lisi & Bill - Haunted By Love (Original Mix) / Key Cm, BPM 120, 6:45, MP3 16.52 Mb
Lisi & Bill - Never Enough (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 121, 5:50, MP3 14.35 Mb
Liu, Alex O'Clock - Bad Boys (Extended Mix) / Key Bbm, BPM 128, 5:15, MP3 12.85 Mb
Liz Van Gretsch - Burn This City (Original Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 95, 3:55, MP3 9.54 Mb
Lo Fi Jack - Grooves (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 86, 2:40, MP3 6.66 Mb
Locasena - Can't Stop (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 134, 5:37, MP3 13.59 Mb
Logo alloy, Zam T - What I Gota Do Boy (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 120, 6:02, MP3 14.60 Mb
Lois (fr) - Fire (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 129, 5:55, MP3 14.44 Mb
Loopover - Hant (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 140, 4:54, MP3 11.78 Mb
Lorenzo Chi - Under Deep (Original) / Key Fm, BPM 123, 4:49, MP3 11.79 Mb
Lorenzo Chi - Under Deep (WhoisBriantech House Of Bx Dub) / Key Gm, BPM 125, 7:12, MP3 17.51 Mb
Lorenzo Oppo - Schranz (Original Mix) / Key Bbm, BPM 82, 4:42, MP3 11.58 Mb
Lost In Bass - I'm Here (Original Mix) / Key F#m, BPM 140, 5:30, MP3 13.45 Mb
Louis Millne - W.Y.G.D (Original Mix) / Key F#m, BPM 128, 6:45, MP3 16.56 Mb
Low Detail - shadowsintheforest (Original Mix) / Key Cm, BPM 119, 1:38, MP3 4.74 Mb
Luca La Rocca, Ivision - Nobody Stranger (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 140, 5:32, MP3 13.39 Mb
Luca Maniaci - Evanesco (Original Mix) / Key C, BPM 140, 5:36, MP3 13.56 Mb
Luca May - Orizon (Trance Progressive) / Key Fm, BPM 138, 5:00, MP3 12.21 Mb
Lucalag - Night Shift (Original Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 124, 5:49, MP3 14.37 Mb
Lucalag - Northern Lights (Original Mix) / Key Cm, BPM 124, 5:49, MP3 14.37 Mb
Lucianno Villarreal - Lo fi pattern (Original Mix) / Key Dbm, BPM 123, 6:46, MP3 16.40 Mb
Ludwig Berger - leeching off the glow-work of organ rooms (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 140, 3:13, MP3 7.84 Mb
Ludwig Berger - like aurochs who fraternized with syntax of the riverbed (Original Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 148, 2:48, MP3 6.83 Mb
Luigi Di Buono - Las Mujeres (Original Mix) / Key Dbm, BPM 128, 4:45, MP3 11.72 Mb
Luis Baro - Sintilate (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 128, 6:46, MP3 16.50 Mb
Luis Miranda - Awamba (Original Mix) / Key Dbm, BPM 139, 4:40, MP3 11.36 Mb
Luis Miranda - Sincopada (Bruce Zalcer Remix) / Key Am, BPM 140, 4:19, MP3 10.54 Mb
Luis Miranda - Sincopada (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 140, 5:39, MP3 13.75 Mb
Luis Miranda - Termination (Original Mix) / Key Cm, BPM 138, 5:34, MP3 13.53 Mb
Lukas Stern - Check my Groove (Original Mix) / Key Dbm, BPM 148, 5:04, MP3 12.52 Mb
Lumonde - Feel Alive (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 142, 8:04, MP3 19.67 Mb
Lumonde - Forever United (Original Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 142, 6:51, MP3 16.76 Mb
Lysergic - Reconexion (Original Mix) / Key F#m, BPM 126, 7:02, MP3 17.30 Mb
M Wagner - Marcy Av (Original Mix) / Key Cm, BPM 126, 4:42, MP3 11.58 Mb
M Wagner - Never Gone (Original Mix) / Key A, BPM 132, 4:46, MP3 11.74 Mb
M Wagner - Rome Generator (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 96, 2:31, MP3 6.35 Mb
M!KE V - There For You (Original Mix) / Key C, BPM 124, 3:00, MP3 7.55 Mb
M. Vaughan - Cold Read (Original Mix) / Key Bm, BPM 106, 4:39, MP3 11.35 Mb
M87 - Dream (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 143, 5:53, MP3 14.26 Mb
MAINCREED - Falling. (Loved & Held) (Original Mix) / Key Db, BPM 135, 2:55, MP3 7.44 Mb
MAINCREED - Inner Peace. (Satisfied & Fulfillment) (Original Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 130, 3:11, MP3 8.09 Mb
MAINCREED - Offline. (Thankful & Be Present) (Original Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 132, 3:25, MP3 8.66 Mb
MAINCREED - Summer. (Hope & Bright Future) (Original Mix) / Key F#, BPM 155, 3:36, MP3 9.10 Mb
MAINCREED - Toxic Habits. (Performance & Expectations) (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 132, 3:46, MP3 9.50 Mb
MAINCREED, YUILA - Hopeless. (Vulnerable & God) feat. YUILA (Original Mix) / Key Bm, BPM 126, 3:57, MP3 9.96 Mb
MARK HAMILTON - Acid on My Drinks (Ademir Remix) / Key Em, BPM 138, 10:16, MP3 25.07 Mb
MARK HAMILTON - Acid on My Drinks (DJ Deep Noise Remix) / Key Bm, BPM 138, 5:48, MP3 14.36 Mb
MARK HAMILTON - Acid on My Drinks (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 150, 3:44, MP3 9.41 Mb
MORVN, Jimmy Moon, Alure - Got No Love (Extended Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 126, 3:03, MP3 7.66 Mb
MVCA, Avi Snow, maybealice - Open Waters (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 120, 2:52, MP3 7.22 Mb
Maf3sto Musique - Umber (Original Mix) / Key Bm, BPM 113, 8:17, MP3 20.34 Mb
Mahe Schulz, Hombres Buenos Hacen Deep - Salvation (Edit Mix) / Key Bm, BPM 126, 2:06, MP3 5.39 Mb
Mahe Schulz, The Watermelon Summer Crew - Sunshine People (Edit Mix) / Key Em, BPM 122, 2:09, MP3 5.54 Mb
Mairos, DJ FISH (Official) - Detroit Memory (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 120, 5:57, MP3 14.45 Mb
Majed Salih - Morssk (Original Mix) / Key F, BPM 119, 5:42, MP3 13.70 Mb
Malyne, Lewii, Luminatix - Nothing Left (Original Mix) / Key Fm, BPM 142, 5:05, MP3 12.43 Mb
Mandabrat - Angels Cry Too (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 120, 5:28, MP3 13.27 Mb
Manu Soto - Somalie (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 125, 6:35, MP3 16.01 Mb
Mao Al - Deconstruction (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 140, 5:48, MP3 14.19 Mb
Marc Brauner - Margarita (Original Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 124, 6:15, MP3 15.03 Mb
Marcello Perri - Drug Addict (Original Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 129, 7:27, MP3 18.42 Mb
Marco Bailey - Full Steam (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 131, 5:10, MP3 12.65 Mb
Marco Herzing - Gallus (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 139, 5:32, MP3 13.60 Mb
Marco Herzing - Prince Chelios (Original Mix) / Key Dbm, BPM 136, 6:07, MP3 15.02 Mb
Marco Wellisch - Bammbule (Original Mix) / Key Cm, BPM 127, 8:08, MP3 19.74 Mb
Marco Wellisch - Down to His Knees (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 125, 7:35, MP3 18.44 Mb
Marco Wellisch - Fine Tune (Original Mix) / Key Cm, BPM 124, 6:31, MP3 15.88 Mb
Marco Wellisch - StundenTräumer (Original Mix) / Key Cm, BPM 120, 8:56, MP3 21.68 Mb
Marcus Code - I Feel The Sunlight (Original Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 126, 6:08, MP3 14.98 Mb
Marcus Soulbynight - Deep Faith (Original Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 124, 5:56, MP3 14.35 Mb
Mareke - I Waked for Love (Original Mix) / Key Cm, BPM 128, 5:16, MP3 13.00 Mb
Mariline - Tu Cuerpo (Extended Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 125, 4:37, MP3 11.38 Mb
Mariline - Tu Cuerpo (Original Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 125, 2:23, MP3 6.03 Mb
Marina George - BPD (Original Mix) / Key Bbm, BPM 140, 8:58, MP3 21.66 Mb
Mario Conte - Naikeland (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 120, 7:32, MP3 18.18 Mb
Mario Conte, Fabio Spzz - Cubalibre (Original Mix) / Key Cm, BPM 125, 8:19, MP3 20.06 Mb
Mario Tapon - Body Grooving (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 124, 6:16, MP3 15.32 Mb
Mario Tapon - Keep Moving (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 124, 6:12, MP3 15.16 Mb
Mark Dekoda, Droplex - Seductive (Original Mix) / Key A, BPM 136, 5:39, MP3 13.72 Mb
Mark Pharrow - Boogity Bump (Extended Mix) / Key Em, BPM 126, 3:59, MP3 9.72 Mb
Mark Pharrow - Boogity Bump (Radio Edit) / Key Em, BPM 126, 2:59, MP3 7.34 Mb
Marlldexx - Voodoo Drums (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 126, 5:24, MP3 13.19 Mb
Martin Ikin - Hustlin' (Extended Mix) / Key F#m, BPM 129, 4:49, MP3 11.66 Mb
Martin Yorston - Crazy (Original Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 132, 6:22, MP3 15.57 Mb
Martin and Morales - Wet (Original Mix) / Key Bm, BPM 128, 7:38, MP3 18.60 Mb
Marzziano - MUSIC IS THE KEY (Original Mix) / Key Bm, BPM 128, 6:06, MP3 15.07 Mb
Massa - Inner Depths (Original Mix) / Key Bbm, BPM 169, 6:33, MP3 16.01 Mb
Massa - Miracle Worker (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 127, 6:48, MP3 16.62 Mb
Massa - The Seed (Original Mix) / Key Bbm, BPM 127, 6:12, MP3 15.18 Mb
Mastik Groove - Eternal (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 135, 5:49, MP3 14.11 Mb
Morris DJ, Ferreck Dam - Impetus feat. Morris DJ (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 128, 4:04, MP3 9.80 Mb
Morris DJ, Ferreck Dam - Impulsive Techno feat. Morris DJ (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 127, 5:23, MP3 12.98 Mb
Morris DJ, Ferreck Dam - Metamorhic feat. Morris DJ (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 127, 5:46, MP3 13.90 Mb
Moses (IN) - Made To Rave (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 145, 5:01, MP3 12.07 Mb
Mosfamous - Feeling B (Original Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 132, 6:35, MP3 15.97 Mb
Mosfamous - Galactica (Original Mix) / Key F#m, BPM 128, 7:36, MP3 18.42 Mb
Mossed - Side A (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 138, 5:43, MP3 14.09 Mb
Mossed - Side B (Original Mix) / Key Bm, BPM 137, 5:44, MP3 14.13 Mb
Mossed - Side C (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 136, 6:20, MP3 15.56 Mb
Mossed - Side D (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 141, 6:23, MP3 15.70 Mb
Mossed - Side E (Original Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 137, 6:07, MP3 15.08 Mb
Mossed - Side F (Original Mix) / Key Fm, BPM 140, 5:34, MP3 13.75 Mb
Mr. Nunez - Morena (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 127, 6:07, MP3 14.87 Mb
Mr. Nunez - The Warning (Extended Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 126, 6:06, MP3 15.14 Mb
Mr. Nunez - Toma (Extended Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 130, 5:55, MP3 14.72 Mb
MusicbyAden - Yore (Original Mix) / Key B, BPM 120, 3:44, MP3 9.20 Mb
NERGY - Move Your Feet (Extended Mix) / Key Dbm, BPM 126, 3:37, MP3 9.13 Mb
NMN - Haptico (Original Mix) / Key Bm, BPM 138, 5:49, MP3 14.22 Mb
NMN - Haptico (The Fabric Of Reality Remix) / Key Gm, BPM 135, 5:22, MP3 13.13 Mb
NMN - Ocularcentrismo (Original Mix) / Key Fm, BPM 134, 6:00, MP3 14.65 Mb
NMN - Retina (Original Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 133, 6:05, MP3 14.85 Mb
Nachtwaker - Selfhelp (Original Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 128, 6:11, MP3 14.98 Mb
Naems, Koriz - Inside Your Mind (Extended Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 140, 2:47, MP3 7.51 Mb
Nalestar, Agezzi, Nick Palm - Old Friends (Original Mix) / Key Bbm, BPM 122, 3:03, MP3 7.44 Mb
Namhar - A Moment Of Chaos (Original Mix) / Key Fm, BPM 145, 5:45, MP3 13.82 Mb
Napsoul - Nobody Knows (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 115, 6:09, MP3 14.92 Mb
Nastro - Hit The Club (Original Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 136, 6:07, MP3 14.78 Mb
Nastro - On Fire (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 137, 5:29, MP3 13.27 Mb
Natalie Greffel, musclecars - Ha Ya! (Eternal Life) (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 116, 7:40, MP3 18.69 Mb
Nathan Barato, Gettoblaster - The Move (feat. Tony Duke) (Original Mix) / Key F, BPM 129, 5:31, MP3 13.44 Mb
Nausica, Danny Rhys, Gloria IT - La Flaca feat. Gloria IT (Extended Mix) / Key Am, BPM 128, 5:18, MP3 13.17 Mb
Nautica, LVGA - See Me Fly (Club Mix) / Key Am, BPM 125, 3:55, MP3 10.02 Mb
Ned Bennett - Big Band Accelerator (Original Mix) / Key Dbm, BPM 144, 5:29, MP3 13.40 Mb
Neil Landstrumm - Hybrd (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 138, 6:07, MP3 14.73 Mb
Neil Landstrumm - Techno For Tash (Original Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 134, 5:49, MP3 14.01 Mb
Nem - What You Believe (Extended Mix) / Key Fm, BPM 126, 3:49, MP3 9.23 Mb
Netty Hugo - Avon (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 141, 5:18, MP3 13.05 Mb
Netty Hugo - Dont Ever (Original Mix) / Key Bbm, BPM 136, 5:43, MP3 14.03 Mb
Netty Hugo - Nova (Original Mix) / Key Bm, BPM 145, 5:23, MP3 13.23 Mb
Netty Hugo - Or4l (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 151, 4:51, MP3 11.95 Mb
Neuron, Davvi - No Rules feat. Davvi (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 97, 3:25, MP3 8.58 Mb
Newlexim - Too Good to Be True (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 115, 6:15, MP3 15.11 Mb
Newlexim, Sambo Sq - Soul Deep feat. Sambo Sq (Original Mix) / Key C, BPM 114, 5:45, MP3 13.94 Mb
Niall Kelly - Guataqai (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 143, 5:57, MP3 14.57 Mb
Nick Dare - Don't U Want It (Original Mix) / Key Cm, BPM 123, 6:51, MP3 16.81 Mb
Nick Dare - Keep Me Right (Original Mix) / Key Bm, BPM 123, 5:50, MP3 14.38 Mb
Nick Harvey - Work (Extended Mix) / Key Fm, BPM 127, 6:39, MP3 16.16 Mb
Nick Hook, Mizaru, Quentin Hartz - Reach (Martin Sharp Remix) / Key Gm, BPM 125, 6:43, MP3 16.37 Mb
Nico Crespo, MRVLZ - All Around Me (Extended Mix) / Key F#m, BPM 126, 6:11, MP3 15.21 Mb
Nico Crespo, MRVLZ - All Around Me (Original Mix) / Key F#m, BPM 126, 4:40, MP3 11.57 Mb
Niereich, Shadym - Fermi Paradoxon (Original Mix) / Key Bbm, BPM 130, 6:02, MP3 15.04 Mb
Nifiant - Loneliness (Original Mix) / Key Fm, BPM 115, 2:37, MP3 6.58 Mb
Niklas Wandt - Gottesfuß (Original Mix) / Key A, BPM 98, 5:25, MP3 13.26 Mb
Niklas Wandt - Wandt Uncorked (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 133, 6:48, MP3 16.59 Mb
Nilbog, Julia Okulewicz - Kregoslup (Original Mix) / Key Cm, BPM 120, 5:44, MP3 14.34 Mb
Nilbog, Julia Okulewicz - Scesja (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 134, 7:47, MP3 19.26 Mb
Nino Tores, Tal Tobi - Different (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 122, 5:27, MP3 13.44 Mb
Nino Tores, Tal Tobi - Minako (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 122, 5:20, MP3 13.18 Mb
Nino Tores, Tal Tobi - Strange (Original Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 124, 4:39, MP3 11.53 Mb
Niteplan - UNDR-GRND (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 127, 6:03, MP3 15.09 Mb
Nkanyezi Kubheka, Golden DJz, Uncle Zee - MSOLOMBA (Original Mix) / Key Eb, BPM 113, 5:29, MP3 13.39 Mb
Nowakowski, Alex Denver - Call me (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 120, 3:36, MP3 8.85 Mb
Noël Patrianelli - Shake It (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 128, 4:30, MP3 10.88 Mb
Nuhn - Archangel (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 145, 7:12, MP3 17.40 Mb
Nuhn - Better Than Knowledge (Original Mix) / Key Dbm, BPM 140, 4:54, MP3 11.94 Mb
Nuhn - Diablo (Original Mix) / Key Cm, BPM 135, 7:24, MP3 17.90 Mb
Nuhn - El Amanecer (Original Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 140, 5:57, MP3 14.44 Mb
Nuhn - Orphax (Original Mix) / Key F#m, BPM 160, 6:54, MP3 16.74 Mb
Numa Gomez - Tra Tra (Original Mix) / Key Dbm, BPM 125, 5:57, MP3 14.41 Mb
Oakstream - Sweet Bubbles (Original Mix) / Key Fm, BPM 118, 4:57, MP3 12.17 Mb
Octavio - Burned Device (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 135, 5:49, MP3 14.11 Mb
Octavio - Doomsday (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 136, 5:46, MP3 13.99 Mb
Octavio - From Within (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 136, 5:46, MP3 14.01 Mb
Oi - Interstellar (Original Mix) / Key Fm, BPM 125, 4:37, MP3 11.45 Mb
Oi - Neptune (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 125, 5:30, MP3 13.60 Mb
Oi - Orion (Original Mix) / Key Cm, BPM 125, 4:52, MP3 12.08 Mb
Oi - Sirius (Original Mix) / Key Fm, BPM 125, 4:33, MP3 11.29 Mb
Oldboy, Odyssette - Risk It All (Original Mix) / Key C, BPM 120, 3:23, MP3 8.47 Mb
Oliver Deutschmann - Dogma (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 128, 6:25, MP3 15.74 Mb
Oliver Gil - Baby Again (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 126, 5:11, MP3 12.74 Mb
Oliver Gil - Baby Again (Radio Edit) / Key Am, BPM 126, 3:07, MP3 7.81 Mb
Oliver Rosa, Papi Mikey Dinero, Bruut 99 - Immigrana (Extended Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 129, 5:59, MP3 14.47 Mb
Oliver Wickham - Heart and Mind (Extended Mix) / Key Eb, BPM 122, 5:04, MP3 12.35 Mb
Oliver Wickham - Let's Go Back (Extended Mix) / Key Bm, BPM 124, 7:16, MP3 17.61 Mb
Ollie S. - Luminous (Original Mix) / Key Dbm, BPM 126, 7:11, MP3 17.29 Mb
Ollie S. - Stanton (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 127, 6:39, MP3 16.03 Mb
Ollie S. - Stanton (Steve Kelley Remix) / Key Dm, BPM 126, 5:51, MP3 14.08 Mb
Ollto Jade - Aesthetics VS Mechanics (Original Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 124, 5:43, MP3 14.07 Mb
Ollto Jade - Lambda X 3 (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 124, 5:15, MP3 12.95 Mb
Olly James - Inside Your Mind (Extened Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 142, 3:28, MP3 9.07 Mb
Omega Drive - Let's Twist It (Original Mix) / Key Cm, BPM 140, 7:33, MP3 18.38 Mb
Omega Drive - Love Me (Original Mix) / Key Cm, BPM 132, 6:27, MP3 15.77 Mb
Omega Drive - You Want What (Original Mix) / Key Bm, BPM 143, 6:50, MP3 16.67 Mb
OneSeas - Room of Fearless (Original Mix) / Key Cm, BPM 126, 5:20, MP3 13.08 Mb
OneSeas - Skygrid 2 (Original Mix) / Key Bbm, BPM 129, 4:45, MP3 11.69 Mb
ki ya tori - yume (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 132, 7:22, MP3 18.00 Mb
madugo, loumé - By Your Side (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 110, 2:16, MP3 5.80 Mb
musclecars - Running Out Of Time (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 122, 7:19, MP3 17.84 Mb
musclecars - There's Space For Us All (Original Mix) / Key Fm, BPM 124, 9:53, MP3 23.99 Mb
musclecars, Kamaal - Tonight (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 124, 5:56, MP3 14.52 Mb
​
DOWNLOAD - progonlymusic com

I finally mustered up the mental energy to watch the Tell Alls so I can watch the new season (I like to be caught up before starting new, cause they make references to past drama), and this girl drives me nuts.
Natalie to Josh one moment: “I need you to help me, I’m all alone in LA & I’m an immigrant! I have my mother here and I can’t do it alone!”
Her to Josh the next: “I don’t need you! How dare your friends suggest I’m using you for money, and you treat me like a charity case?? Then leave!”
But you bet your ass she’s gonna make him look like the villain to everyone else when he does leave without helping her anymore.
Girl, YOU chose to move to LA. YOU chose to bring your mother here (when she was no longer in Ukraine, so it wasn’t like she needed to get her out asap). YOU chose an apartment you couldn’t afford, & made Josh co-sign for you, when he didn’t want to. YOU keep dropping crazy bombs and then being surprised when he leaves you. YOU keep sleeping with him so you can get back together, then try to convince everyone else that he’s using you.
How tf can she think about having a baby rn when she can’t even afford to pay her own rent, and now has to pay for her mother’s added expenses? That girl doesn’t need to be on tv, she needs to be mentally assessed. Don’t beg your ex husband for a baby, and your ex bf for his $, and then act like they’re the assholes for saying no.
I’m sick of the other members coddling her too & jumping on Josh every 2 seconds.

Throw away account because why not?
When we first started dating he loved bombed me with gifts and ALOT of letters that would say things such as I've never felt this way before, and you're amazing, and I could see this going forever, and I never knew how possessive I was till I met you. We only dated a little under 3 months at this point; I decided it would be best for us to go on a break because he wasn't following my boundaries with the love bombing and it seemed like he needed time to build up his self. We went on the break for a week during which he went on this dating app for teens and told me that it was fine he was only on there for fun. I told him at the end of the week that "I didn't think I wanted to keep dating:" and he just replied with "k". which left me feeling like I didn't get closure but I ignored that and would talk shit about the relationship with my friends (we dated in the friend group so we had the same friends (side note: they felt like he distanced himself from them when we started dating and he would get jealous when I'd make flirting jokes with them which we always made; this caused some people in the friend group to feel some type of way about him)) But I would still tell my friends not to be too harsh and give him the benefit of the doubt, and then when my friend Mike brought up that my ex had been avoiding me, him, and Danelle; my ex got upset and brought up something that made me uncomfortable. So I got pissed and didn't talk to him for like a month and a half because I was like you lashed out at me for no reason, and was aggressive towards him when I did; I thought that there was no way he wouldn't have known what he said would make me uncomfortable since every time it was brought up I talked about how it made me sad. After this though for some unknown reason, I felt like I needed him back (p.s i mentioned the teen dating app because he ended up dating some guy on there 2 weeks after we broke up). So I ended up texting him and in the text, I apologized for everything in the relationship even the stuff I didn't think I did, and told him Id like to be friends again and he said he was sorry that something he said would hurt me and that he truly didn't know it made me sad or that I would be offended and we were on good terms again. I called my friend crying cause I didn't know how I felt about my choice and my brain was saying I didn't want him back but my heart was saying I needed him. Fast forward and we are on good terms but don't talk much, later I am out of school for weeks because I get really bad depression from being heavily overwhelmed and find that a game is my safe space because I can stay home and never see the public while still feeling like I'm interacting with something. My ex is really into the game so he joined my game we have a lot of fun and it is my first human interaction in 2-3 weeks. We stayed on call playing the game for 17 hours straight that night and it became a habit for us to have all-night calls, I started feeling like he was the only one who truly got me because he understood and related to a lot of the things I was dealing with and thinking about in my depression and we start to flirt like we did when we first were dating. Finally, I returned to school and saw my other friends and unintentionally did not talk to him as much because I realized how much I missed my other friends we don't have classes together so I only saw him once during passing that day anyway. Once I got home I got on a call with my friend Danelle and she's like see you didn't need "EX" to be in public, and I was like huh I didn't realize that but I don't wanna bet on it. After this moment "EX" gets a little more distant but it's not noticeable so I don't really care, but then I go through his tik tok, and I knew at this point that he had a crush on a different girl earlier in the month, but I didn't realize that he had written paragraphs and made tik toks about how down bad he was for her just 20 days ago. This was a red flag for me since I don't see how he could've gotten over her in 20 days and I don't wanna be his second option just because she won't date him. I end up bringing it up to him casually saying oh I saw your tik tok you should go for her. And he said "Who? Sam?" and I said yes, and he said I told u before there wasn't a spark so we are just friends now. And I said how do u move on in 20 days and he said what TikTok are u talking about? So I sent it to him and he said he couldn't see it, so I was explaining where it was and he said it was probably deleted refresh your page, and I said how was it deleted if I'm looking at it? and he said refresh your page it must have been recently deleted, I said but then he wouldn't be able to see which one I'm talking about. And then he said refresh your page I just deleted it. Which threw me off because I was thinking why did you delete it? and why did you try to act like I was crazy for seeing it as if it had always been deleted? so then he ends up saying that he was 70% moved on and 20% not. So from that moment on he would not get on a call with the rest of us, at first, I was like oh it's okay; he missed the call, then I was like maybe he doesn't see the call notification so let me send a text so he'll know, and then I got so desperate that I was about to @ him when my friend Danelle got on the call and distracted me. It was hard for me because I feel like I need him in my life and to go from calling every day to never really made me desperate for him to get on a call and we go back to how it was when I was depressed. He finally got on call last night and although we stayed up a little late he was distant and not as talkative or giggly as he used to be. also after the talk about Sam, he stopped saying goodnight and sweet dreams when we got off the call and would only say gn. What are your thoughts on this, on one hand, I wanna be like fuck him I don't wanna be his second choice. And on the other hand, I really wanna go back to flirting with him and date him.
But I do feel guilty because he says that he felt like he couldn't tell our friends about our relationship. After all, the majority sided with me whenever we would have issues, so I feel bad that he didn't think he had support during the relationship. Also, decisions for me were hard in the relationship because he would give me his opinion and I'd wanna go with that and then my friends and family would say a different opinion and I would want to go with that; so I never felt like I got to make my own decision without worrying about other peoples opinions
Timeline (dated until December) (No talking until around February) (Started the late-night calls in early May) Happened this year

You dare not use the "P Word."
P_G draws all the looneys out; the type of crazy person that will say anything to derail the conversation; the type of hand wringing that makes it obvious there is a cover up going on.
David Seaman has alerts set up so that he is ready to respond to any P_G post within moments, to insert disinformation about James Alefantis being a Rothschild and intentionally, always, forgetting the fact that "I've never had an affair before" is the end of an email thread that describes providing three young girls for entertainment.
The P_G terrifies shills and it terrifies elites such that they spent billions trying to bury the story and make it even seem dangerous to talk about. The over-the-top suppressive response was what drew a lot of people's attention.
On Reddit, you can see the censorship at work; the most reasonable answer, awarded "Reddit Gold" is deleted.
https://i.imgur.com/teOOQPI.png
rareddit allows one to see what Reddit has deleted. In this case, we see that Reuters set of a "strawman argument" about a basement, while ignoring the real focus; the convicted pedophiles; the satanic imagery; the corruption. Reuters is a corrupt mouthpiece of the elite.
https://i.imgur.com/HZ2S8lF.png
Reuters recycled an old trope from another child sex story in Britain, "There is no basement, so there is no child abuse." The problem is that Reuters and James Alefantis lied to you. Why would they lie about a basement?
https://i.imgur.com/3Vsgpbz.jpg
Ben Swann did a 5 minute run down, which is the best introduction to the issue:
Here is the video:
https://gvid.tv/v/XzjlMh
Here is a screenshot of the opening:
https://i.imgur.com/U6oQa28.png
But notice he says, in regards to John Podesta's emails "none mention child sex trafficking".
There is literally a file called "Italy Child Sex." There is the hot tub email. Ben Swann does a pretty good job of balancing what he is and isn't allowed to say, but his summary leaves a lot to be desired.
https://i.imgur.com/o3Tyt1e.png
He does mention the "code words." "Cheese pizza" has been used as an alternative way of referring to "child porn" on the Internet, for years. 4chan even organically invented a way to deal with "cheese pizza" threads, by inserting pictures of spider man to fill the threads to limit.
"Dr. Pizza", a journalist with Ars Technica, staunchly denied Pizzagate was real, but was then caught as being a pedophile. Dojo Pizzeria was tied to an arrest. "The Pizza Connection Trial" involved using pizzerias for laundering money from drugs and human trafficking. There are plenty of red flags.
https://i.imgur.com/zBygdzo.png
Megyn Kelly did the most unjournalistic interview, possible, of James Alefantis in order to help cover up the crimes involved. She leaves out the blackmail case, Laura Silsby, the pedo musicians (Sex Stains, Majestic Ape), the satanic imagery on Alefantis' Instagram, the babies, drugs and money on Instagram, and on and on. Megyn Kelly is not just the dumbest reporter, there is, she is intentionally blind to the obvious.
https://i.imgur.com/IeLc8Rd.png
It is worth noting that Alefantis allowed a camera into the pizzeria to show a bullet hole in the computer, claiming that it went through the door first... but there is no bullet hole in the door.
https://i.imgur.com/orQNaSY.png
Megyn Kelly expresses horror, sympathy over Pizzagate in first interview with Comet Ping Pong owner
https://archive.ph/mC7q7
A fake media narrative was set up that discussing this topic was dangerous, when they staged a scene where son of an FBI agent "show up" Comet Ping Pong. A "False Flag" shooting.
https://i.imgur.com/7GN1Mzv.png
The lie was obvious. Why would a "P_G Researcher" shoot a computer that supposedly housed all the evidence?
https://i.imgur.com/qeX1oVG.jpg
Despite the suppression and spin of the story, it continued to gather steam on the Internet, resulting in entire communities being banned; tens of thousands of people blocked from viewing any content.
Before Reddit completely banned P_G subreddit, this was one of the last posts (which was deleted along with everything else.)
https://i.imgur.com/DKJkdQJ.png
Given all of the corruption and cover ups we know about, it is no surprise that P_G has been reduced to nothing more than a footnote in conspiracy forums. But, when there are new developments, thousands of people take notice, though they no longer discuss it, from fear of being banned.
The last corners of the Internet where people were allowed to discuss, were heavily shilled and monitored by SITE Intelligence Group (Mossad cut out that makes fake threat reports) and their allies, so that they could be labeled "extremists."
Even in those dark corners of the Internet, the issues were still being pushed and still causing some progress to be made; if nothing else, then they at least continued raising awareness.
https://i.imgur.com/sIjplTL.png
Project FLICKER
https://i.imgur.com/5LthZW1.png
Sodomy, bribery: The case against Terry Bean
https://archive.ph/n0UNJ
Ed Buck Sentenced to 30 Years in Federal Prison for Providing Methamphetamine to Two Victims Who Suffered Fatal Overdoses
https://archive.ph/70944
Adam Schiff and a Writer for "Lucifer"
https://i.imgur.com/oxPCj0Z.png
Adam Schiff. Ed Buck. Ted Lieu.
https://i.imgur.com/OXDXY9Q.png
P_G did not pop out of thin air. Not only was pizza already in wide use as a code word, John Podesta already had a reputation for being involved in blackmail rings.
https://i.imgur.com/s6P9uJF.png
Comet P1ng P0ng already had a reputation of documenting wild parties. Nevermind, whether or not, that could be Hillary and Huma on a ping pong table; why would there even be two women dressed to look like Hillary and Huma on a ping pong table? And why would that be recorded and then rebroadcast at Comet?
https://i.imgur.com/8FRaQAb.png
Notice the Pentagram on the Pizza, on the poster in the girl of the room who made the video of "Sex Stains" at Comet.
https://i.imgur.com/uEgcYJP.jpg
Here is her family. Draw whatever conclusions you like.
https://archive.ph/WA4lM
The research continued, but the astroturfing stuck to the same tired arguments that were now, officially, debunked.
https://i.imgur.com/pGuTcie.jpg
P_G drew so many people not because of a basement, or a specific allegation; people were drawn in because it pulled together so many issues under one umbrella, resulting in a series of cascading epiphanies that was neurologically rewarding researchers.
https://i.imgur.com/1NLY4de.png
It is now deleted, but my recollection of when P_G "broke" was on the now banned "The Donald" subreddit, when, along with the realization that John Podesta and James Alefantis were connected in a number of ways (David Brock even claimed they were dating in a video interview), the "FBIAnon" post about Hillary Clinton being involved in human trafficking, the connection with Marina Abramovic and "Spirit Cooking", and the "Edible Schoolyard"... the question emerged organically...
https://i.imgur.com/j1vhVmI.png
"Are these people joking about eating kids?"
https://i.imgur.com/udXqU5T.png
This is what the media and government was really trying to hide. Whether it was true or not, people asking the question is enough to destroy nearly every single career politician, CEO and news outlet that helped cover it up; as well it should.
https://i.imgur.com/BjVwBKr.png
All of the other corruption is bad enough, but these people are practically bragging about it on social media.
https://i.imgur.com/EXBPYZa.png
In The Secret Teachings of All Ages, we are introduced to a number of ancient rituals that date back prior to the written word. One of these rituals was to be buried alive. One might say a sensory deprivation tank is the modern version, but we keep seeing child sized coffins in the social media of this group of people.
https://i.imgur.com/xHh29a7.png
"Marina" was who Hillary Clinton was printing classified material for. Here is Marina Abramovic with John of God.
https://i.imgur.com/Q3L7A0r.png
Marina with boy.
https://i.imgur.com/7PFEISA.png
Marina with girl.
https://i.imgur.com/Mu0mhYr.png
People have every right to question what is going on with these images.
https://i.imgur.com/uzRNGCj.png
Note: Tamara Luzzatto is not actually their grandmother. But, she is in Sydney Blumenthal’s contacts, along with half of DC. The other half? Have her husband in their contact list.
https://i.imgur.com/HiVEmyI.png
Marina Abramovic, Marco Brambilla, Jeff Dupre
https://i.imgur.com/utVX6tg.png
Marina's "Art".
https://i.imgur.com/CqRsMDZ.png
More "Art".
https://i.imgur.com/EGq6cag.png
A cannibalism reference?
https://i.imgur.com/7tcDgUE.png
Marina and Rothschild.
https://i.imgur.com/jvZ7XTW.png
Marina and Dr. Oz?
https://i.imgur.com/aFM9ayl.png
Similar to the Finders ritual?
https://i.imgur.com/PpSmLBH.png
Many of the researchers on the Internet were correct and their research was borne out with the arrest of Epstein, Maxwell, Nygard, Brunel and others.
Bill Clinton denied, but he lied.
https://i.imgur.com/i2uInFa.jpg
Nobody was yet talking about Maxwell and Epstein stealing babies.
https://i.imgur.com/hJP7I5W.png
The Finders files were not yet public in October of 2016.
This story, though guessed at by P_G researchers, was also borne out.
Secret CIA Files Say Staffers Committed Sex Crimes Involving Children
https://archive.ph/L6C9F
CNN Producers were not yet arrested for trying to build their own sex slave networks.
https://archive.ph/3n11T
Another former CNN producer under investigation for child sex crimes
https://archive.ph/c13rY
Comey had not been exposed, yet, in October of 2016, of ordering a cover up of P_G. The IG report with emails from Comey's personal account had not been released, yet.
"A Serious Woman*
https://i.imgur.com/x9sj7cB.png
Coleman Notes:
https://i.imgur.com/KNwKJRT.png
The Anthony Weiner Laptop:
https://i.imgur.com/AyvYFUf.png
Brett Blomme, a juvenile court judge, had not yet been arrested, where he and his husband were sexually abusing their adopted children and uploading the recordings of it to Kik, gave out kids, using the legal system, to his pedo friends.
https://i.imgur.com/fzO0K70.png
Adam Schiff and Ed Buck are both into young black men.
https://i.imgur.com/oxPCj0Z.png Epstein Didn't Kill Himself. But, someone went to a lot of trouble making a fake video to try and convince us he did.
https://i.imgur.com/1aK08wN.png
All of the evidence disappeared.
https://i.imgur.com/b661F86.jpg
"Minimum Security" Maxwell's Customers Are Still Free.
https://i.imgur.com/NokPzFZ.png
A Mossad blackmail ring was, more or less, operating out in the open and anyone who complained about it was treated like they were crazy. This went on for decades, and, then, it turns out everyone who was complaining was, not only right, but that it was worse than anyone was willing to let on.
https://i.imgur.com/Fr11sR5.jpg
Former Israeli Intel Official Claims Jeffrey Epstein, Ghislaine Maxwell Worked for Israel
https://archive.ph/Sja88
Former Spy Details Israel’s Main Motive Behind Epstein’s Sexual Blackmail Operation
https://archive.ph/IeBgO
Epstein's blackmail ring was never the only game in town.
Jean-Luc Brunel: Epstein associate found dead in Paris prison cell
https://archive.ph/2R41A
Fashion Mogul Set to Face Sex-Trafficking Charges in U.S.
https://archive.ph/nMs3v
This all happened AFTER Reuters insisted that P_G was fake.
Even prior to October of 2016, there was already a great deal of public information that should have been very concerning. There was plenty of reason to have legitimate concerns about Comet P1ng P0ng when some weird information started to come out.
Before Comet P1ng P0ng made the spotlight, most people were not aware of information that was already available.
Jeffrey Epstein was accused of sex trafficking young girls on his mysterious private island. Over 40 years ago, a different millionaire escaped justice in a stunningly similar case.
https://archive.ph/8ivRh
Ghislaine Maxwell's father was an Israeli spy and she almost certainly inherited his blackmail operation. Robert Maxwell was also involved in text books for the US educational system.
*The “Anti-Extremism” Think Tank Started by Sons of Israeli Superspy Robert Maxwell *
https://archive.ph/lCvQ6
Mega Group, Maxwells and Mossad: The Spy Story at the Heart of the Jeffrey Epstein Scandal
https://archive.ph/A6dsG
Roy Cohn was another blackmail ring operator and mentor of Donald Trump.
https://i.imgur.com/Pnly1CT.png
The Hellfire Club
https://archive.ph/LrXni
When James Jameson Bought A Girl Just To Watch Her Be Eaten By Cannibals
https://archive.ph/3YT1d
You will be cooked into a kebap if you are too uppity about it and the police will do nothing.
https://i.imgur.com/X7kdBG4.png
Clinton's faith healer, Oprah's friend, John of God, with a baby farm and in jail for sexually abusing hundreds of women. The Chicago Ripper Crew. The Franklin Scandal. UN Child Sex Abuse. None of this stuff is new.
https://i.imgur.com/cvkO8Ix.jpg
DynCorp
https://i.imgur.com/cMndyxc.png
Bacha Bazi
https://i.imgur.com/gaNSXaH.png
Cover Ups.
https://i.imgur.com/a1fAvlo.png
More cover ups.
https://i.imgur.com/fSir93g.png
And more cover ups.
https://i.imgur.com/hlV5aAe.png
And more cover ups.
https://i.imgur.com/FyzLh0e.png
And more cover ups.
https://archive.ph/sAu38
How many pedophiles are the Clintons tied to? I've lost count.
https://i.imgur.com/dcXvCNm.jpg
James Alefantis and David Brock
https://i.imgur.com/sxTSS5p.png
Lawsuit of David Brock and James Alefantis
https://i.imgur.com/lHFkcNy.png
Media Matters for America
https://i.imgur.com/oxE9aPs.png
Exclusive Access to money laundering through art.
https://i.imgur.com/Gl1ds8y.png
Friends with Police
https://i.imgur.com/aYc1Xuq.png
Heather Podesta on the Board.
https://i.imgur.com/y01Onag.png
But P_G was more than just about research into what was going on politically, or into James Alefantis obvious satanic proclivities and his obvious attraction to children. What was revealed was a dark nexus of media, politics and these weirdo cultists.
There was a widespread epiphany of a great many people that this degeneracy was being intentionally pushed by people who were occultists and wanted everyone else wrapped up in their dark religion. And when we said, "No", they collectively lost their minds.
It should also being concerning that Kamala Harris was tied to Comet, as well, and, seemingly, a top choice for John Podesta to run for office. Considering her ties to fake police...
https://i.imgur.com/vgai2ns.png
In Your Own Homes It is becoming increasingly more difficult to resist these forces from coming into your own home; particularly if you have children.
The pedophiles reading to kids in drag is nothing new to anyone.
Drag Queen Story Hour
https://i.imgur.com/1vg4oCF.png
Alberto Garza
https://i.imgur.com/HjE2JQg.png
William Dees
https://i.imgur.com/7MPhRV0.png
Sasha Sota
https://i.imgur.com/VgQZW8n.png
The bottom line is that the media, the disgusting shills on the Internet, the FBI and many other groups are involved in covering up these crimes because their political agendas demand it.
https://i.redd.it/odn6da1goud91.png
https://i.redd.it/kkqtau7vzec91.png
https://i.redd.it/wna38dwq9mb91.jpg
https://i.redd.it/vhtxtx5p53h91.png
https://i.redd.it/66q2o2axzya91.png
https://i.redd.it/zli9expz18h91.png
https://i.redd.it/4odftufizya91.png
https://i.redd.it/evleoe2uo6b91.jpg
https://i.redd.it/tgc15yd9a7b91.png
https://i.redd.it/tsu5kl1h3cb91.png
https://i.redd.it/zsrbvlo2e2b91.png
https://i.redd.it/vm58sq6t63h91.png
https://i.redd.it/2xooybv1mxb91.png
https://i.redd.it/doxt15ibkxb91.png
https://i.redd.it/285eue79zfb91.png
https://i.redd.it/3zvz15n4zfb91.png
https://i.redd.it/kr5ql6tgb7b91.png
https://i.redd.it/drg7ctpme2b91.png
https://i.redd.it/03lmdltuc0b91.png
https://i.redd.it/0pwf7fa9pxb91.png
https://i.redd.it/cik0p525pza91.png

I'll be completely honest I'm not really sure how this app works or how to upload this so let's hope I do it right 😂 I'm a teen who likes writing song lyrics my crazy dream is being a signer or even songwriter but all I do is write lyrics in a copy can someone please tell me what's the next step? What do I do with the songs I write? How do I get them noticed or get them going somewhere cause I would love to make that crazy very unbelievable dream come true so how do I? Please help I'm very clueless ha.

Homunculi are made from sperm and other elements without the use of a womb. As such they start out with mature bodies. They start with basic knowledge as well as reasoning in order to serve basic functions in life. Due to all this, they were all effectively immortal and could never age.
A Homunculus has been created very recently. 3 weeks before the seventh servant has been summoned.
Scientist: We have done it! This one! His mana is through the roof! He should be able to win the only grail war no issue!
The homunculus looked at his own hand in disappointment. His name was… Soule.
Soule: I exist to be trusted into a war? Just to give these freaks the powers they wish?
The ones who brought Soule into this world were a group known as “Command” They’ve been trying to enter the holy grail war whenever it happens and win to gain the famous holy grail itself. Yet they either couldn't enter or had their master representative killed.
Soule was created to be a perfect endless pool of mana that would make sure they win. 7 hours after Soul’s complete birth he killed everyone in the lab he was born into.
Soule would find himself in a city. He just walked and walked the uncaring people who passed him but without a second thought, the animals that would shit and piss along what should be a nice concrete sidewalk, and the children who cried at the smallest inconvenience. It all was so foul. Soule hated life already.
7 days before the summoning of the servant servant Soule stood alone in a house filled with the bodies of a crushed 3 person family.
Soule: I summon you, servant. I need you now to follow his goals! YOU WILL SERVER UNDER ME FOR THIS WAR YOU UNDERSTAND?! NOW APPEAR!
And like a call in the great unknown, the unknown answered back with a bright light that went away revealing a talk demonic looking man.
???: I have been summoned… I am Ivan The Terrible your Rider class servant. Do not test me just because you're my master or-
Soule: Or what? You'll kill me? I think you and I both know that you don't want that to happen!
Rider: You dare disrespect me! I shall crush your face in if you keep disrespecting me!
Soule: Wow such a terrible liar! Listen here, you disgusting bastard! My one and only goal is the downfall of all life!
Rider: Then why even bother with this war?
Soule: It's simply a means to an end! I want to know my limits before I kill all on this planet. Is that so hard to understand?
Rider: Very well then. I have few objections to your foolish goal so long as I can have the grail in the end!
Soule: Hey I don't really care! I want to kill all life more personally than wishing them away anyway!
Rider: I can only imagine what spurs such hate in a heart.

Leo: OK time for me to go to school!
Ky: Leo you can't!
Leo: And why not?
Saber: Leo I can not demanifest, unlike other servants due to your low mana. I can't protect and watch over you in school. So you may be attacked by a master while I'm away.
Ky: Plus School isn't that important anyways.
Leo groaned as he did want to go to school to meet up with his friends. He felt as if this stupid war had concerned every aspect of his life.
Saber: I apologize for this inconvenience master…
Leo: That's it!
Ky: Huh?
Leo: Saber! We just gotta get you enrolled at my school!
Saber: Are you sure about this master…?
Ky: And he's lost it…
Leo: Yeah! You don't look any older than me!
Saber: I highly doubt it will be that easy-

Leo’s school at first period. It was that easy.
Saber and Leo sat directly next to one another. Saber not really wanting to be here in this school as a student even if it was to protect Leo.

Standing on top of the school were Soule and Rider. Soule smiled as he placed his hand in a strange sign.
Soule: Ready?
Rider: Yes.
Soule: Summon!
A black Vail appeared around the school almost like a curtain and several skeletons spawned inside the school with various bladed weapons. And then a wyvern spawned appeared behind Soule.
Rider: A wyvern!? That shouldn't be possible! Especially by today's standards!
Soule: My my… I'm just full of surprises!

Meanwhile, Saber and Leo were in the school, and people began passing out. Leo and Saber both got worried and Leo was the first to see the semi-translucent dark veil around the school.
Saber: A Vail! Damn it! A mage must be behind this!
Leo: A mage?!
Saber: A mage is most likely currently awake, unlike the rest of the school! Come on we must hurry!
Leo: Alright! Saber!
She transformed into her armor and held her misty blade tight. The two run off into the way to long and large school hallways. They soon spot a few skeletons trying to attack unconscious students and staff so Saber cuts a few down and Leo destroys the rest with a few punches.
Leo: The heck were those?!
Saber: Seemingly some kind of monsters summoned by whoever has done this master!
Leo: OK then! I think we should try the-
Just then to cut the young boy off Soule and Rider crash through the ceiling. The rubble crushed some of the staff and students to death.
Soule: We found Saber and her master now Rider!
Rider: Killing you will be worth it…
Saber: Master stay back!
Leo: No way I can't leave you to fight alone I'm helping!
Soule: Look at the worthless feelings they share. I suppose the rift raft being as sorry as it is would all group up and care for one another! Rider kill Saber!
Rider charged forward his staff slamming Saber through a few walls into the science room. The demonic servant charged forward with great strength but before Leo could help his servant he received a major kick to the face from Soule.
Soule: Oh no you don't!
Soule then eagerly kicked Leo to the ground and tried to stomp his skull in but the young teen managed to roll out the way.
Soule: Are you done with your silly caring shit? If so fight me! Cuz if you don’t~
Soule’s Wyvern busted through the school’s entrance and into where Soule and Leo were currently.
Soule: You'll die!
Leo: A dragon?!
The Wyvern bit down at Leo who held its jaws open for a moment before Soule appeared behind him transforming the wyvern into a sword that flew straight into his hands to stab Leo in the side of his chest.
Leo: Ow fuck fuck fuck!
Soule would then kick him in the leg before grabbing him by the hair and throwing him into the ceiling above or what was left of it.
Leo was spurring our blood trying to get a moment to grab ahold of his bearings something that Soule shocking would allow.
Soule: See what I mean?~

We cut to Saber and Rider fighting. Rider shoots out several electrical bolts from his staff as fast as lighting Saber easily manages to dodge.
Saber: A nice try Ruder but you'll need to try harder than that!
In all honesty, Saber was worried for her master. The master alongside Rider seemed entirely different from anything she felt before.
Rider: You fight well Saber I can give you that!
Rider would run up and give a surprise uppercut! She spat out a small bit of blood before two lighting shots appeared from his staff blasting Saber into some equipment she threw at Rider on impulse. The equipment didn't hurt him yet it turned into smoke creating a smoke screen for Saber to roll behind Rider and stab him through and back. Yet Rider filled his entire body with electricity that flew through Saber’s sword and shocked the blonde woman herself before an elbow knocked her to the ground.
Saber: Ugh…

We see Leo standing up as Soule walks through his blood on the floor.
Soule: You see brat? You're gonna die. Not like it matters though! After all, life doesn't have a meaning!
He tried to cut off Leo’s head but he ducked under and punched him in the gut making Soule stumble back. Soule tried to kick Leo but he grabbed his leg and twisted it making him fall over onto his face before Leo slammed him into a nearby wall!
Leo then began smashing around the skilled mage all over the place faster and faster! Stronger and stronger! Until Soule cut off his own leg! To hop away from Soule using his one remaining leg while his old one regenerated!
Soule: Rider!
Rider hears his master's calls so he runs toward him at top speed before scooping him up.
Rider: Fine then Soule we leave! Next time Saber! You're dead!
Soule: Until next time we curse each other! You brat!
Soule opened a portal that Rider jumped through and it immediately closed behind him. Saber stumbled out of the science room and over to her master.
Saber: Leo are you alright?
Leo: No…

Hi gainers,
I have just finished running Super Squats by Randall J. Strossen and wanted to share my results. There are plenty of discussions of this program out there already, but I figured sharing my experience with the program can't hurt and can hopefully be interesting, or maybe even useful to someone. This was my first time running a "proper" program (i.e. one designed by a prefessional) and it has been by far the most productive training block I have done so far. Since I am a beginner, I'm not calling this a review (I don't have the training experience to offer any kind of expert opinion). This post is meant rather to show my results as a beginner on the program and to share some of my thoughts about it.
[Before, 82kgs, 10 April 2024](https://imgur.com/a/super-squats-before-82kg-10-04-2024-PvPBvIl). NSFW. Pics taken the day after the first workout.
[After, 86kgs, 18 May 2024](https://imgur.com/a/loPa07y). NSFW. Pics taken the day after the last workout.
Background:
M30, 6'2", no athletic background. Typical denizen of this sub in that I could always eat loads and not put on weight blah blah blah. Worked out in my teens with weights in my room but never maintained a consistent schedule long enough to see significant results. Fast forward to 2 years ago when I started doing bodyweight workouts at home and making an effort to gain weight. Had some success and then started going to the gym at the start of this year. Did a 4 day/week UppeLower split with some success. My weight had fluctuated between a very skinny 67kgs to around 73kgs throughout my twenties. Prior to running Super Squats I had already bulked from 74kgs at the start of December to 82kgs at the start of April (I started taking creatine in January which definitely contributed to this weight gain).
The Program:
Super Squats is a book, which is short (less than 100 pages) and contains everything you need to run the program. Although the book was written in 1989, the routine it outlines is based on old-school squatting programs utilized by strongmen from the 1920s onwards. A chapter is devoted to this history of squats, the "master exercise". There are a couple of anachronisms (my favourite is referring to the hamstrings as "thigh biceps") but overall it is well-written and presented.
The program itself is a six week full-body routine, with the choice to run it 2 or 3 days per week. I won't spell out the whole program here (just buy the book), but the core of the routine is, of course, a single set of twenty heavy squats, with the trainee taking at least three deep breaths between each rep. The squats are supersetted with a set of light pullovers or Rader chest pulls to stretch the rib cage. The starting weight for the squats is a weight you can do for 10 reps (and yes, you really do twenty reps with that weight) and the program stipulates that you must add at least 5lbs/2.5kgs every single workout. The program is fairly light on volume (especially if you run it 2 days per week like I did) but what it lacks in volume, it more than makes up in intensity.
There is no way around it: heavy, high-rep squats are deeply, profoundly, brutally unpleasant. There is no stipulation for rep cadence or how long the set should take, you can take as long as you like, but completing 20 reps with good form will require having the bar on your back for at least 3-4 minutes. From week 2 onwards, the single set of squats always took me more than 5 minutes (and it always felt much longer).
Performing warm-up sets slowly and deliberately was crucially important. Before I even got to the warm-up sets I performed a few reps of touchdown-squats on a box, and a few more of goblet squats with a light kettlebell, opening my hips against a resistance band to prime my glutes and quads.
Super Squats is the embodiment of "mind over matter". The book has a whole section on mindset and positive visualization to help trainees to manage the seemingly impossible task of squatting a 10-rep weight for 20 reps. It sounds stupid, but by the second half of the program, I had gotten into a ritual of giving the bar a firm slap, as a jockey would slap his racehorse, before I started the set, cementing my effort to view the bar not as an enemy to overcome but as a friend helping me to achieve my goals.
Reps 11 and 12 were usually the hardest. By the time I got to ten reps my legs were already trembling. My whole body was drenched in sweat, the weight of the bar impossibly heavy resting on my traps, crushing my whole body into the ground. Time had slowed to a crawl, and the thought that I was only half way would be enough to sap my resolve if I let it. Once I got to rep 13, comfortably more than halfway, I no longer had to think about breathing. I was sucking in great lungfuls of air automatically and heaving them out so hard I sprayed the mirror in front of me with droplets of spit (yes, of course I wiped it down afterwards). Once I got to rep 17 I knew I had the set in the bag. No matter how tortuous those last three reps, no matter how long they took, no matter how many heaving breaths I had to take, I could do 3 more reps.
During week 2 I had what I think is the closest I've ever had to an out-of-body experience. It was as if I was watching someone else perform the agonizing reps while I talked myself through the rest of the set: "Breathe, good, deeper, you've got this, next rep, nice. Keep going".
Breathing is the key. The book talks at length about the importance of deep breathing throughout the set. Pretty quickly, I found that deep breathing was the only way to keep from passing out or collapsing mid set, though as I said, deep breathing becomes automatic about halfway through the set (there's simply no other way to stay upright with the weight on your back). A very helpful tip from the book is to suck in an extra gulp of air on top of your already full lungs for each of the last reps.
If all this sounds a bit exaggerated, try the program and see for yourself. But I'm not trying to put anyone off with this description, quite the opposite! The great thing about Super Squats is that the difficulty of the squats is directly proportional to the feeling of giddy elation upon completing the set. I always felt great after the set, and rode the feeling of accomplishment for the rest of the day. The program really pushes you beyond the boundaries of what you think you can do.
My Progress:
I started the squats at quite a low weight of just 40kg. The book recommends erring on the side of starting too light, and then adding more weight if needed, so that is what I did. Remember, the program stipulates a minimum increase of 5lbs/2.5kgs per workout, but there's nothing saying you can't add more. Once I realized the weight was too light (I managed 21 reps for the first workout) I simply increased the weight by 10kgs on the second workout and continued with the 2.5kg increases from there.
Before starting Super Squats I had had a two week break from training due to illness, so I started with too-low weights (I exceeded the target rep range on all exercises). So I increased the weight by 5-10kgs depending on the exercise for the second workout. The program has varying set numbers and rep ranges for different exercises. As a general rule, I increased the weight once I could hit the target rep range for the first two sets of each exercise, but I did not stick to this rule every workout.
The only thing I stuck to was the minimum increase of 2.5kgs for the squats every workout. I managed this consistently until the final week, when I failed on the eccentric of the tenth rep with a weight of 77.5kgs (a 5kg increase on the previous workout). My legs just gave way and I could not get back up. I did two more sets to make sure that I at least performed more total reps than the previous workout. Then, in the last workout, I amazed myself by succesfully performing all 20 reps with the same weight. Definitely the hardest set I have ever done, and I was completely finished afterwards, but the highlight of the program for sure.
Other ups and downs: I lost reps on Bench and Bent-over Rows on both workouts of week five, but got them back in week six and set new PRs on both. A good reminder that progress is rarely linear. My left knee started hurting in the last week, but thankfully the pain hasn't persisted. I guess my form might have broken down a bit too much in one of the last workouts.
Diet:
The book's diet advice is very simple: lots of calories and protein, with the majority coming from healthy whole food sources. Nothing surprising there. The book has two recommendations in addition to meals for achieving these goals: milk and shakes. The book doesn't use the GOMAD acronym, but that's basically what it boils down to: a recommended minimum of 2 quarts (about 2 litres) per day in addition to meals and snacks, with a recommendation to increase to up to a gallon (nearly 4 litres) per day if you can.
I was somewhat surprised to see that the book recommends home-made mass gainer shakes for trainees who struggle to eat enough solid food (the book refers to them as "blender bombs" which I think sounds much cooler).
I am not vegetarian, but I don't eat meat very often. I live with my fiancee, who doesn't like meat, and since we eat dinner, the main meal of the day, together, we eat a lot of plant-based meat substitutes. I did, however, eat meat more often than usual during the program. My typical diet looks something like this:
Breakfast: Usually muesli, with seeds, fruit (apple or banana), yoghurt, and a scoop of unflavoured whey protein.
Lunch: Usually eggs, fried or scrambled in butter, served with wilted spinach on wholemeal toast or with pasta and pesto. If not eggs then leftovers from last night's dinner. My local supermarkets do a rangle of reasonably healthy frozen meals and during the program I ate these a couple of times per week, always going for chicken dishes with plenty of vegetables.
Dinner: Something based around the aforementioned meat substitutes. Favourites include spaghetti bolognese (with plenty of cheese of course), chili with black beans, sour cream and guacomole served with rice, and burgers with fries for a "junk"/"dirty" option.
I don't count calories but I do roughly track protein, aiming for 2g per kg bodyweight and topping up with whey protein as needed.
During Super Squats, I upped my creatine dosage from 3.5g/day to 5g/day, added extra snacks to the above diet (nuts, dark chocolate etc.) and also milk and shakes as the book suggests. For the first three weeks I had a daily shake consisting of whey protein, milk, cocoa powder, banana, peanut butter and oats. The shakes helped with weight gain, but they proved unsustainable, as they led to some, er, digestive issues. Ok, they gave me explosive diarrhoea. See [this review of Super Squats](https://empire-barbell.com/2021/07/23/super-squats-review-of-the-legendary-20-rep-squat-program/) in which the author recounts ingesting a shake according to the book's recipe before starting a work shift and shitting himself during the shift, lol.
I hadn't really drank milk for several years prior to the program (I tend to prefer oat milk with my muesli) but I did increase my milk consumption slowly over the six weeks. For most of the duration I drank a couple of glasses per day, totalling only about 500ml -1 litre. Only in the last week did I make a serious effort to drink at least 2 litres per day. Turns out it's really easy to drink a lot of milk, and a very cost-efficient way to get lots of extra calories and protein. Who knew haha.
Rest and Recovery:
I've been having trouble sleeping lately, which was the reason I opted to do the program 2 days per week from the beginning (the book recommends starting with 3 days and dropping down to 2 if you find you can't recover sufficiently between workouts). I was a very deep sleeper as a child but those days are long gone and these days the slightest noise seems to be enough to wake me. My fiancee gets up early for work during the week (her alarm goes off at 4:45am), ivariably waking me before it does her, and we have a cat, who tends, as cats do, to go crazy in the small hours (her new favourite thing is scratching frantically on the closet doors). I've tired everything I can think of short of getting rid of the cat, which I'm not willing to do for the sake of gains. Hopefully she will mellow as she gets older. If nothing else, I guess it's good practice for when we become parents lol. Suffice to say it's rare that I get an uninterrupted 8 hours of sleep.
I tried to do everything within my power to get as good sleep as I could (making an effort to get to bed earlier, playing with the cat to tire her out, etc.). I still made good gains despite overall poor sleep, but there were definitely some days when I could have gotten to bed earlier.
What I liked about the program:
Super Squats is a simple, easy-to follow program which is practically guranteed to lead to growth. The non-negotiable nature of progression from workout to workout gives a strong incentive to eat enough and get enough rest. I seriously can't see how someone could follow this program, increasing the weight as prescribed, and not grow.
Another thing I liked was making significant progress over a short timeframe while only training 2 days per week, leaving more time for life outside the gym.
By far the biggest benefit of the program, hower, is the lessons it imparts and the mental toughness it inculcates. Lessons you can only learn by standing under the crushing weight of the bar for 20 reps. Put simply, you are capable of more than you think you are, and this program teaches you that in a way that words never could. I feel that I now inderstand intensity as a training variable far more deeply than I did before the program. After running Super Squats I understand why it is so often recommended to beginners.
What I didn't like about the program:
The individual workouts took far too long. This was by far the biggest thing I disliked about the program. The book claims that the Basic Routine should take less than an hour to complete, but I found that I rarely completed a workout in less than 90 minutes, and several times it took me a full 2 hours. Granted, this was partly due to training in a busy McGym, where waiting for equipment is often a factor, and I feel like I spend half my life searching for locking collars, but even so, the long workouts were grinding. Another big factor is just how exhausted you are after that set of squats. I often felt like I was moving in slo-mo, with the stiff-legged deadlifts (themselves no easy exercise) and calf and ab work still to get through.
The other main negative factor was how daunting the squats are. I rarely looked forward to workouts, and often actively dreaded them. I really had to psyche myself up to go to the gym on this program, despite knowing that I would feel great after my workout. That next set of squats was always looming ahead menacingly.
What I would do differently:
The biggest thing I would change is doing the milk properly from the beginning. By "doing the milk" I mean drinking at least the recommended 2 quarts per day. I would also probably leave the shakes out, and make an effort to eat cleaner. I kind of gave myself free reign to cut corners and do what it takes to gain on the program (spooning peanut butter from the jar and ice cream from the tub, eating "junk" meals like burgers and fries or frozen pizzas a couple of times a week, etc.).
I would have chosen a different abs exercise. I did hollow-body crunches, but since these can't be loaded (as far as I know) I had to resort to adding extra reps and then an extra set to add progressive overload. It would have been smarter and more time-efficient to simply choose a weighted abs exercise and increase the load each workout.
I could have been more diligent about consistenly increasing weight/reps on all exercises other than the squats. I feel my progress on the other lifts could have been better.
The book does not mention cardio, and in fact states that trainees should move as little as possible outside of training to allow for maximum recovery. I will definitely add some light cardio in the form of walking the next time I run the program (thanks to u/MythicalStrength for pointing out that since the program is based on old-school principles, it is likely assumed that pretty much everyone would have been doing a fair bit of walking before lifestyles became so sedentary in developed countries). Over the weekend between weeks five and six my mother came to visit, and in the course of showing her around my city I did a lot of walking that weekend (15k steps each day). I think this may have contributed to the failure on the first workout of week 6 by eating into my recovery. Ideally, I would just do, say, a 30-40 minute walk on off days throughout the program.
Most of all, I would trust the process. Of course this is easy to say with hindsight, but there was a point in weeks 3-4 where I got quite demotivated, felt like I coudn't notice the program working (of course not - visual changes take longer than a couple of weeks!) and felt quite tired out from all the eating, so I ended up eating a bit less for about a week in the middle of the program, which quite possibly contributed to the strength losses in week 5. Again, progress isn't linear, but if you stick to the program over six weeks it will pay off.
Conclusion/Next Steps:
Running Super Squats over the last six weeks has been without a doubt the most physically and mentally challenging thing I have ever done, but the payoff has been well worth it. 4kgs gained in 6 weeks and invaluable lessons learned. I'm going to have to go clothes shopping and replace most of my wardrobe. Shirts and T-shirts that were loose are now tight, and my old slim-fit T-shirts now look comically small. Even my straight-leg jeans are now tight fitting (my fiancee said the other day, "Those jeans are a bit tight on you now, huh? But your bum looks great!").
Being on the taller side, I still have quite a lot of frame to fill out, and I still have a lot to learn about training. I will definitely be running Super Squats again in future. I am especially interested in running the Abbreviated Program, consisting of only the squats, pullovers/Rader chest pulls, bench, and bent-over rows. This would solve the problem of workouts being too long, but I imagine it would be extremely challenging, since you should increase the weight on all exercises each workout, not just the squats. With bench and bent-over rows offering less overall muscle fibre recruitment than squats, and 2.5kgs being the smallest weight increase logistically possible (in my gym, anyway), I imagine that this would be challenging in the extreme.
The book suggests running a strength-building training block after the 20-rep squat program, consisting of more sets with lower rep ranges. It even suggests alternating between six weeks on the 20-rep squat program and six on the strength-building program, extending Super Squats well past the initial six weeks. While this approach is intriguing, I want to try something different, and I would rather have more training days in the week in return for shorter individual workouts.
I've ordered a copy of 5/3/1 and will probably run 531 for Beginners, and then see which template I run after that. I have my eye on the BBB Beefcake 3 Month Challenge, but I'll see when I get there. For now, I'm going to dial back on the eating, to around maintenance levels, for at least a couple of weeks (I need a break from stuffing myself all day).
In the meantime, I can't recommend Super Squats enough! You will surprise yourself on this program.
Well, that turned into a huge wall of text. Thanks very much for taking the time to read if you got this far!

I hate the sight of my own body.
I can’t come out to my grandfather, whom I love, because I worry he won’t take it well. He’s in his 90s, he won’t be here for much longer, and I’ve been avoiding him. I dread having to wear a suit at his funeral, and I feel guilty that that is what springs to mind when considering his passing.
Recently, there was news from where I’m from originally that two toddlers were attacked by a group of young teens because their father was transgender. I have always been scared that when visiting home if I spend time with my niece and nephew they could be in danger just by being near me. This proves I was right. And not just them - what about my friends, my partner, anyone who dares associate with me? Can I ask them to take that risk?
I feel like I’m torn in two. On days that I can spend the time to shave within an inch of my life, apply a copious amount of makeup, put on my wig - at least I can be me. Any day that I need to let my skin rest, or I’m out of colour corrector? Then I just look at myself with pure loathing. And hell, even when I can do all that, I’m still horrifically ugly to look at. I still just look so out of place, people a mile a way could tell what kind of person I am and despise me for it.
I am so tired of this. I’m sorry.

I’m going to get a ton of flack for this. BUT I wish I had never joined a pregnancy community. I’m a FTM and I’m 10w + 4d. I found out at about 4 weeks. So yea lol. BUT due to these threads I now have such a high anxiety about miscarriage. I honestly never thought about it before I got pregnant and when I first got pregnant I didn’t either. It wasn’t until probably like week 8 that I had to take all notifications away for these type of threads. I understand women go through them and want an outlet and want to speak and wouldn’t dare want to take it away from them. But it has caused me so much anxiety that I constantly worry about and can’t get the thought or idea out of my mind. To the point when people ask me what I want. I can’t say because I honestly am only praying for a healthy child and a safe pregnancy. And I’m scared of everything that can go wrong. I like these type of community’s for the information and to be able to vent and then boom out of nowhere someone talks about how they’ve never made it this far and it’s there 4th time or how everything was great and now there 15 weeks and no heartbeat. It’s so fckin scary. And it’s not just Reddit. It’s ig and twitter too, etc. my anxiety is everywhere. I don’t talk about to my friends or partner because it’s like I don’t want to put it out into the universe and I don’t want them to think I’m crazy and I think they’ll just wave me off like girl don’t think about that. You’ll be fine. But I am scared and I really want to stop being scared.

I’m going to get a ton of flack for this. BUT I wish I had never joined a pregnancy community. I’m a FTM and I’m 10w + 4d. I found out at about 4 weeks. So yea lol. BUT due to these threads I now have such a high anxiety about miscarriage. I honestly never thought about it before I got pregnant and when I first got pregnant I didn’t either. It wasn’t until probably like week 8 that I had to take all notifications away for these type of threads. I understand women go through them and want an outlet and want to speak and wouldn’t dare want to take it away from them. But it has caused me so much anxiety that I constantly worry about and can’t get the thought or idea out of my mind. To the point when people ask me what I want. I can’t say because I honestly am only praying for a healthy child and a safe pregnancy. And I’m scared of everything that can go wrong. I like these type of community’s for the information and to be able to vent and then boom out of nowhere someone talks about how they’ve never made it this far and it’s there 4th time or how everything was great and now there 15 weeks and no heartbeat. It’s so fckin scary. And it’s not just Reddit. It’s ig and twitter too, etc. my anxiety is everywhere. I don’t talk about to my friends or partner because it’s like I don’t want to put it out into the universe and I don’t want them to think I’m crazy and I think they’ll just wave me off like girl don’t think about that. You’ll be fine. But I am scared and I really want to stop being scared.

I'm a teen and I live in a family of 10. There's 4 girls in my family, my 2 baby brothers, my parents, and my grandma. It's not easy have 7 kids in one family. I can never get anything for myself. One time I've been begging my mom to get me a Chromebook since they were giving them away, just for 2 months later for me to never ever use it because my siblings always hide them. But since I'm the only boy in my family other than 6, all of my siblings always gang up on me and they also got my little brothers to do so as well. They always try to make me seem crazy in front of my parents so that they could slap me or ground me. One time my dad told me that he wished that I died because I screamed at my siblings. My little brother is kind of strange, he doesn't much, can't speak, and he never clean up after himself. Which leads me to always watch him and when my siblings are watching him and he does something wrong, they try to pin the blame on me and I get hit by my parents. Also just the fact that we have a big family cause a lot of problems, as I said before, I can never have something for myself and my parents can never afford things even though they have well paying jobs. I don't hate my siblings but sometimes I wonder how life would be without them. But I guess they feel the same my younger siblings may think of me as a rude older brother who doesn't like them.

Burner account for advice:
So me and wife have been in and started our relationship with the idea of it being free love and open. Both agreed on..with terms. Terms being
1:) No lies or hiding it
2:) No making sure another takes our place as the number one
3:) No exs
As of the last month or so, we have been in the process of moving. Moving close to where a former, last ex, lives. All of this happening sudden and very much like my how my last wife acted before she cheated on me. I didn't suspect my wife of anything at all but brought forth how it was kinda oddly triggering. Assured each time how there was nothing and never an interest or how dare I even assume.
So two days ago, month before move, I'm casually told she does want to change our rule three to sleep with this ex and always wanted to revist it from the start in her mind. I expressed how it made me feel, which was still a "no that's a boundary..and I feel we set it to avoid sparking any old flames and any new people would not be people be previous had romantic relations with. Especially not ones we dated for ten years". I was told instead it was made so I didn't sleep with one of "my" abusive exs and that hers, who she left for me, was cool and chill. I was also told if I had a nice ex I would be ok with it, which no, I would stick to my guns still. Because I would fear the same..I've seen it happen.
As I stood my ground peacefully, she got more and more angry as she tried to continue this sell and not just let it go. Saying how it would be the true test of our relationship and its better to be someone we know than a stranger we get to know and give them those terms. I still disagreed and stuck to my boundary of the old candle outlook and said no. She didn't want to see it that way and said it would be emotionless sex and nothing to worry, yet threw hours into emotion about being told how I felt. Putting myself in the other shoe, I know I would drop it automatically, thats it. Also I expressed how thinking of this for it this long made me feel kinda hurt and mentally she wanted to do this when our whole relationship..all while she's hiding that she wants to change that for the person she just left for me. Told that was my hang out up from previous exs. Mind you, me always talked about our rules and stated "yes those are them". Never agreeing that we could change this and if anything, add things. Never questioned till we move 3 miles from said person..
I was told open means anything can go and no one is off limits and how I don't get it. I told her that even if a new person came around, we both still had to agree and could disagree and that's what makes it healthy. That in order for it to work, any book or Google will state it..even my other poly friends agree
Instead it seemed like more passion was put into this than ourselves recently over being able to break this rule. I will state..I have been depressed for sometime and haven't been all there due to circumstances I've just finally tried to get ahold of, but I feel that shouldn't be an excuse or reason to break a boundary. Sickness and health, wasn't mentally well for 5 months and it got worse when my father passed.
Right now we are on no talking terms, we have a child together, newborn. I've been giving her space and thinking everything over and not knowing what to do. I feel my boundaries aren't be accepted and just rolled with and instead I'm being sold on something and punished for not agreeing to it. She doesn't want to talk without bringing up how I was sad previously, angry at work and being sad about that, upset at my medical problems and me stupidly not listening to her to get them fixed, my crazy ex wife, or my adhd causing me to sometimes forget some things and I may take a minute to get there. All things I've shown Improvement on, even in her words..but all civil talk is broken down to whatever current thing I have to say is counteracted with a past thing.
When asked if she can ever move past it all and us be us again, she never fully answers and it seems that allowing rule 3 to go way is the answer..
Any thoughts at all..brutal or honest, doesn't matter.
Thank you

Just another fun little story idea I had. I am still working on Humans are the violent ones but I like to bounce around and experiment with ideas to see what I really like. I also suck at writing more casual stories, as they give me severe writer's block as I try to map out how to make a scene feel genuine in my head, but I promise I'll update that soon. If you like this story and want to see more, then like and comment. I'll gladly continue this series as well.
Start of Personal Log
Humans don't like being told what to do. They don't like being commanded, put in their place, or snubbed. It was an inexorable, inalienable trait of humans, at least any noteable humans, to go against any authority that they believed was against their interests.
Humanity would not fit amongst the stars. Few ever did. It was a trait of most successful species to be willful, ambitious, and to desire more. But once they reached the stars the new (and simultaneously very old) pecking order either quashed any spirit such species had or simply eradicated them. Countless tomb worlds and diaspora served as painful reminders of what became of the nails that chose to stick out. The hammer of order would always strike. There could be no compromise, the very soul of the authority that held the Jurisdiction together relied on a show of unmatched power, or at least the illusion of item.
In reality, the Jurisdiction was an old, fat, and lazy beast. It filled its belly on the corpses of empires far and wide, and sated its bloodlust on the shattered dreams of hopeful cubs. It had every right to, for none could challenge it: there were no new frontiers to explore, nor were there any other enemies to conquer. The Milky Way, as humans had so strangely dubbed our cradle galaxy, as well as Andromeda, had long since been warred over and settled for millennia before humanity had arrived, bright-eyed and with familiar yet otherwise foolish dreams of cooperation and prosperity. The Jurisdiction did not cooperate, nor did it ensure prosperity. Oh, it claimed it did, but in reality it simply took. The rest was just the peace that came with not being the direct target of the biggest fish in the pond. The humans didn't like that, but they had no choice.
Slavery was a common tribute. The Jurisdiction had no use for other resources: it simply took. No, it wanted those who could facilitate that unequal exchange, those raised in a world where the only morality was the one set by your lord. The Jurisdiction was held together by expectations, obligations, and dury more than any kind of shared dream, so when you were ordered to take you did so without question. Humanity was new: they had no niche or value that set them apart, but they had a penchant for killing and taking, so the Jurisdiction gave them a taste of how the galaxy worked. They killed and they took. The humans didn't like that, but what choice did they have?
Humans were strange. They learned, but not in the way most species learned. Most species learned to adapt in a passive way, to adhere to the world around them. They flowed like water, moving past and around obstacles and confirming to the boxes they were assigned too. Humans didn't confirm, nor did they adapt: they made their circumstances fit their desires. They would not move around obstacles, but rather smash through them, and they refused to stay in one box for too long. The Jurisdiction merely saw them as a particularly loud nuisance, but those who faced their wrath knew better.
It is said that when a beast seeks to make an example, it shall humble its rival by killing it's cubs. Children were one of those universal constants that brought entire communities together: the Sok’klar saw their hatchlings as gifts, shaped by the fruitful currents of the universe in perfect harmony. The Yarrack saw each and every newborn whelp as an uncut gemstone, ready to be shaped into something magical. Humanity oftentimes referred to their offspring as angels, or spirits of unbridled good sent by the gods themselves. Children were seen by most of the galaxy as gifts.
The Jurisdiction saw them as a lever to inflict suffering. It had become quite effective at enacting psychological punishments on those that stood up and spoke out. You dare to disobey? You believe you can speak out? Your gifts shall be taken from you, and you shall be without joy.
Humans didn't like this, but the Jurisdiction would have their pound of flesh, and humankind would kneel. And they did. But humans were patient creatures: most species who retained that trait of willful spit also lacked patience.
I had long since become desensitized to the Jurisdiction’s actions: it was simply how the universe worked now, as if it were a constant akin to gravity. Cruelty was the unspoken rule of this seemingly unending age, where our lives never appeared to move forward or backwards, only lay dormant. The Jurisdiction had been the unyielding authority that ruled the galaxy for thousands of years, venerable yet feared all the same.
And for the longest time I was just another cog in its wheel. My name is Kalnuracht Sedjuur-Noumar VII, and was the scion of the noble house Sedjuur-Noumar. I was born into what most would describe as veiled apathy, living a life that could be attributed to the privileged class of feared scribes that enacted the will of those above. I was an administrator and nothing more. And now I am doomed to be far less than that in the eyes of my former constituents within the endless administration. I am the only scion, as is tradition, and without an heir I am the last of my house, our name to be scrubbed from the records, worthless, meaningless, and forgotten.
I am merely Kalnuracht, nothing else and nothing more. I have seen from their eyes, the eyes of the downtrodden, and it makes my crimes of association with the Jurisdiction feel all the more damning on my worthless soul. I am worthless to the world, and this is my story.
End Personal Log #1
Start of Neural Lace Narrative Log #1
They came from the black like carrion birds in the night, encircling our convoy as if it were a dying animal ready to be picked clean without remorse. There was no warning, no list of demands sent out as civilized peoples did, nor was there either any requirement for unconditional surrender nor chance to parlay, as was done so under letter of marque: this was an unmistakable call for violence and nothing else. They sought to reduce us to slag and scavenge the rest.
So, as one would expect, the entire bridge of the ship was nearing a panicked state. This was not the actions of those practicing civility, but rather the common behaviors of despoiling barbarians, the kind that tore their way through the dark reaches of the galaxy as if they owned it.
“Wayfinder, what do your probes see?” Shouted the ship’s sovereign. He was an older Kar’Rowmach, an amphibious cephalopod species with a venerable history within the Jurisdiction going back thousands of years. Normally one such as him would be above me if it weren't for the fact that I was under the authority of the Jurisdiction’s seal of office. He didn't like me very much, but most of his kind shared the same sentiment.
“All dark, honorable Sovereign: the sensor arrays are wailing but the feedback we're reviewing is beyond incomprehensible,” the wayfinder replied with a certain restrained temper in his voice. The Sok'klar wayfinder swayed gently, his tentacled limbs grasping different metallo-liquid braille output arrays, the liquid gallium flexing and reshaping unnaturally to allow him to to take in multiple different sources of sensory output at once, with the primary navigation computer plugged into the cybernetics surrounding his opaque, gelatinous head and plugging directly into his tube-shaped brain.
The Sovereign cursed in Loskat and pointed to his bridge crew while I simply sat in the back, near the Sovereign’s symbolic throne. “Prepare countermeasures and spool up the warp drive, we cannot allow the amanuensis to be taken! He carries sensitive information that only he can translate and transcribe!”
As the bridge crew nodded and began fiddling with their own systems, I preened my feathered hide anxiously. I wasn't a fighter: us nobles of the cloth were the educated minority above all else, not those who waged war or partook in hard labor. Special cybernetics in my brain allowed me to translate triple-encoded messages that usually took a ducal signet codekey or above to parse, but even without that I was a skilled mathematician and logician. I had terabytes worth of knowledge stored within the hardware installed in my head, all well protected of course, but if I were to die it would still be a waste. I could only imagine the damage any malcontenders could do with it if they were able to get their filthy hands on me.
Suddenly, the ship rocked, and the gallium overhead display began to form crescendos like I'd never seen before. “Sovereign, decks A-3 through C-12 are venting atmosphere and our coolant systems have been obliterated,” the Wayfinder spoke in an almost serene voice, as if he was completely unconcerned by current events. I knew they were simply incapable of tonal displays, but it was unnerving nonetheless. “Once we jump, we will not be able to risk another until the vacuum of the void can reduce temperatures to acceptable levels within the plasma capacitors.”
“Damn them,” the armored nautiloid hissed, his barbed feelers coiling in frustration, “May the currents take them. What are our options? what can we see? This fleet cannot fall to the void today, not with such vital cargo.” My hackles rose lightly at the Kar’Rowmach referred to me as some object rather than an esteemed amanuensis of the Jurisdiction, but I bit my forked tongue. Now was not the time to squabble with the sovereign over who was what and what titles I deserved, not while he was so desperately attempting to keep what semblance of order within his fleet that he had left.
I could not blame the crew for being panicked either: wars were practically mythologized now, having been long since rendered obsolete with the rise of the Jurisdiction, and that felt like an eternity ago. Now, either being levied into or joining a ducal naval force was simply another career, more akin to serving as an officer of the law rather than a fully fledged soldier. Minimal training was required, most of it being the technicals of one's duty rather than any kind of combat conditioning, so expecting a fleet to actually be prepared for a combat scenario in a universe where peace was the norm was laughable.
“We are practically blind, Sovereign,” stated the Sok'klar Wayfinder, “our probes are offline, and shipboard graviton displacement sensory arrays have been rendered unreliable at best.”
“What about the particle emission array? Has there been a spike in radioactivity where we were hit?”
The Wayfinder seemed to think for a second, his gelatinous form flexing and morphing a bit before answering. “Affirmative, a jump from negligible to forty billion becquerels along decks A through E-5 on our starboard side.”
“Torpedoes…” the Sovereign hissed, stroking his barbed feelers, “Human Torpedoes. Only those primitives would rely on crude nuclear warheads.” He then turned to his militant leaders on the ship. “Noddos, Rel’ads: organize your phalanxes and prepare to repel boarders. We are bound to be assailed by those rancorous primates, and I want their skulls piled at my feet if they dare set foot on our ship.”
“Your wish is our command, Sovereign,” the two militant commanders spoke as one. Noddos, a large bipedal with multiple sets of curved spines running down his back, a pair of graceful horns sprouting from his head, and multiple rows of sharp teeth in his snout, bowed first, followed by Rel’ads, a marsupial with long saberteeth and thick fur. They both must have been fierce warriors in their own right to each lead a phalanx. They wore thick, semi-powered armor and held dueling polearms alongside their usual plasma casters, and seemed completely unfazed by the situation we were in. As they stomped out of the brightly lit bridge, I let out a quiet squawk of discontentment. “Sovereign, why haven't we jumped again? We are wasting precious time.”
“I am working on it, you spineless beaurocrat!” He warbled back, his feelers tensing in anger, “besides, it's not as if you're the one who will be spilling blood today, amanuensis, so flatten your wretched beak or I shall weld it shut with a plasma torch.
I was about to reply with something indignant, but the ship rocked again, this time causing the lights to flicker and the air to become… thick. The skin under my feathers began to blister, and I became lightheaded and confused. “Seal the damnable vents, initiate radiation scrubbers, and activate secondary life support!” Shouted the Sovereign, “Their nuclear weapons are rendering the ship inhospitable!”
I coughed up magenta blood accidentally, and I could feel more seeping from under my eyes. Some of the crew was in a similar position, but others were more resistant to radiation than I. The Sok'klar seemed completely at ease as he ran his tentacles across his morphic braille arrays before calmly announcing the ship’s status. “I've regained some control over our probes: ten, twelve, and seventeen are active and fully functional, the rest are either still malfunctioning or permanently inoperable. A rapid rise in localized radiation is also interfering with the detection of graviton displacement; we can't sense photon redirection, thus readings will remain inconclusive.
“Wayfinder, damn you, get me some kind of out here! We're easy prey until we can respond in kind!”
“Negative, something has gone awry with our processing hub, I am attempting to troubleshoot-”
And with that, the Wayfinder’s bulbous head exploded in a cascade of opaque lavender blood, covering the front half of the deck crew like a morbid art piece. Some of the crew screamed and shouted in terror before removing their cranial adaptors and choosing to interact with their displays manually. Others died just as quickly, unable to unplug in time as their brain stems fried or their blood boiled. It was a horrible way to go, having your insides neutralized by your own cybernetics, so I was glad I wasn't connected to the system.
“Cybernetic warfare! All systems are to be considered compromised, switch to manual settings or you'll be killed!”
The lights in the bridge flickered again, and the displays went haywire. The bridge crew, which obviously weren't acquainted with working without being hard-linked into the mainframe, moved at a much slower pace.
“Launch missile pods A through F and set to self-target after five hundred kilometers, then rely on their ballistic coordinates to begin firing broadsides! If we can't see the humans due to their meddling, we'll just have to feel them.” Shouted the Sovereign, “and got me a detailed report on the ship’s diagnostics readings. I need to know if this flagship is still capable of escaping or if we'll have to scuttle it and retreat on another.”
“Acknowledged, Sovereign, launching now,” affirmed another deck officer as he swiped across his own gallium output array. I could hear the dull thunk, thunk, thunk of missiles pushing out of their pods before racing off to their intended targets, then the mechanical whirring as the pods rotated to be reloaded by slaves in the lower decks. I was regaining my bearings as the many horrible sensations of being overwhelmed by radiation poisoning were beginning to subside, but I still felt as if I had been microwaved. The air was stale, the crew was horribly sick as well, and even the sovereign himself seemed to be on his last leg. I was beginning to believe that I might die here.
“Sovereign, a message from the lower decks,” shouted a communications officer, his chitin scraping against itself as he turned quickly, “they're requesting reinforcements, something about being overrun.”
“Impossible,” the Sovereign hissed out in a vain attempt to exude confidence, “We must outnumber the humans, they always go for bigger targets out of arrogance.”
“I've received reports that it's not just humans: the primates seem to make up only a third or so of the assailing force, along with some Phaeldaer and Vrex.”
The commander slammed his clawed hands down on his own output array in a fit of rage, obviously overwhelmed by the circumstances, “Then this wasn't just a typical assault, but something more sinister!” The nautiloid warbled, blood seeping from his shell as the full effects of the radiation took hold, “Get Rel’ads on the line, have him divert all spare lances to the lower decks or else we'll lose the only offensive capabilities we can use.”
“Rel'ads has gone dark, Sovereign, his vitals are critical.”
“Then either get me Rel'ads tail-leader or get me Noddos!” He screamed in rage, “don't give me this nonsense! If we don't pick it up we're all going to die, is that what you want?”
“No, Sovereign, I'm simply overwhelmed-”
“We're all overwhelmed! By the tides, I'm dying of radiation poisoning you nincompoop! Get me something I can work with!”
The officer didn't even acknowledge the Sovereign after that, simply turning back to his display. Eventually, the Sovereign was able to get Noddos on the line.
“Sovereign, two thirds of my phalanxes have been decimated by combat with the primitives and the radiation, the rest are in shambles. We must retreat and fortify elsewhere!”
“Then the ship is compromised! Rel'ads is unresponsive and the lower decks are swarming with intruders. We must evacuate the amanuensis to another ship.”
Just as the Sovereign spoke, I heard several gentle thumps rattle against the bridge’s door, and it made me uneasy. Some of the bridge crew seemed to feel the same, as they looked incredibly nervous and some even drew their sidearms. Just as the sovereign turned to give further orders, the door blew inward with a deafening explosion, followed by shouting and gunfire. Several of the bridge officers were dispatched quickly, brain matter and blood splattering against the delicate electronics. Others were shot in the legs, the torso, or in any other exotic yet non-vital body parts. The humans poured in, brandishing primitive ballistic firearms and jury-rigged energy weapons while wearing scavenged, legion-grade powered armor.
The Sovereign was the next to go, but he wasn't afforded an honorable death. He was shot along the arm with a particularly potent plasma caster, burning off his clawed hand and cauterizing the wound, the acrid smell of roasting chitin filling the already hot and cramped bridge. He fell back against his output array, the gallium reaching new highs and lows as more diagnostics and casualty reports were delivered, and he clutched his stump angrily. “I'll burn every last one of you in the foundries! I'll tie you to stakes, cover you in wax and set you alight! Your screams will be broadcasted all over the galaxy!”
One human warrior stomped up and slammed the butt of his rifle into the sovereign’s face, shattering his facial plates and causing blue blood to splatter across his section of the bridge. “Shut the fuck up, you mutant lobster,” the human said before dragging him by both antennae towards the center of the bridge and receiving a stained breeching axe from one of his comrades. “Emmanuel, start recording. We need proof.”
The other human nodded and pressed a button on his armor before lifting up his gun again. The rest of the humans fanned out, holding everyone else at gunpoint. I tried to get up and sneak out, but a human grabbed me by my neck and nearly wrung it out as he forced me to my knees and pointed a sidearm to my skull. “Get down, you piece of shit, before I blow your brains out too.”
“Damnable primate,” I hissed, but he bashed me in my skull with the base of his sidearm’s grip and sent me sprawling, making my already pounding headache worse. Another human shouted at him in a language I didn't recognize, but he sounded furious. The first brought me back up to my knees again, and I complies with a hiss and a groan, blood still leaking from my eyes and mouth and my world was spinning.
The Sovereign struggled, but he was weak from the radiation poisoning and he couldn't exactly resist on account of his lost arm. The human with the breaching ax kicked the Sovereign down and forced him to kneel before lifting up the breeching ax and splitting his chitinous head down the middle with one powerful swing, sending more blood and brains across the floor. “Execution confirmed, take his antennae just in case and we've got ourselves a bounty. Now all we need is that ugly cat’s teeth and the fat hedgehog-thing’s grimy spines and we'll be in business. Although, they do have skulls… we might as well just take their heads.”
The real horror of the situation dawned on me at that moment: they were going to kill us all, or maybe worse. They mentioned a bounty for the commanders, and multiple of the higher ranking ship officers were already dead, their brains splattered against the walls or their bodies torn apart by gunfire. I wasn't dead yet, but that didn't mean much since I wasn't an immediate threat.
“Alright, round them up and bring all the grunts to the hanger bay, then kill the rest,” the leader of the humans said in such a lackadaisical manner that his complete disregard for life almost made me sick… almost. I had seen worse from the Jurisdiction before, but usually that was from me delivering some kind of ordered judgment on a world that had sinned against order. I might have simply been the messenger, but I had seen many of the outcomes. “And make sure to collect whatever proof of bounties you can, we'll need to deliver them to the office to get cashed out. Don't let this be a repeat of last time where Juarez fucking forgot to take a few heads and it ended up cutting our profits in half, the fucking retard.”
Some of the humans chuckled at that as they dragged more of the senior officers away, out of the room and into the hall,where I heard gunshots. The rest of the bridge crew froze in place, different fear instincts kicking in. The remaining Sok'klar corralled together into what seemed to be a singular, semi-congealed mass as if to try and trick the humans into believing that they were much bigger and much more threatening than they actually were. The one Thei’chi on the bridge, an ensign who had clearly thought this would be a simple mission, bore her curved fangs at the humans and growled as they approached, her hackles completely vertical and her eyes dilated. They quickly muzzled and bound her before beating her over the head with a gun stock, sending her sprawling onto the ground. Many others simply cooperated, eyes wide and yet simultaneously empty, as if they couldn't quite process that the ship had been taken and the commanding officers were being executed as the rest were escorted to the hangar.
“Get the damn messenger down to the hanger as well, we need whatever data's in his ugly lizard head, then we can decide on what to do with him.”
I spat at him in spite, as if to try and seem brave, but it was clearly an empty gesture. “You won't get anything, primate! You couldn't possibly crack the encryption!”
The human holding me seemed to wind up for another swing, but the commanding officer simply held up his hand to stop my tormentor before strolling over to me. He knelt down and removed his helmet, revealing a beige-colored face covered in scars, wiry black hair cut down to the scalp, and multiple tattoos. “You're really fucking mouthy for a hostage,” he said before punching me across my beak faster than I could register. I heard a sharp crack as his fist connected, and my head spun again as the metallic taste of blood pooled into my mouth. “I'd advise you to shut up, but I'm sure you won't listen: you aristocratic types are so full of yourselves. Maybe I should have you flogged in the public square until your vocal chords give out once we rip those cybernetics from your head, huh? How's that sound?”
“It won't matter… it won't change anything… the Jurisdiction will hunt you down.”
“Maybe, but I doubt it will happen for some time: they really suck at doing anything that requires effort, even when they're mad enough. They just keep sending their rabid lapdogs to try and smoke us out, and they always end up full of holes,” the human officer said with a smirk, his yellowish-white teeth and green eyes sending shivers down my spine as he drew his knife. “They're just horrible at their job, you know? You've all gotten so lazy and incompetent after being able to just take what you want without resistance, and now that you've met people who are angry and crazy enough to fight back you act as if we're committing some grave injustice,” he placed the knife against my throat, the flat just underneath my now bent beak, “No, we just took a few pages out of your book, ‘cept we've got standards. No kids, for one…” he seemed to look off into the distance as his sneer deepened, “but it's more than that, we don't attack the defenseless in general and we still win against you all in fair fights.”
I went to say something else snarky, but he quickly grabbed my thin tongue with his fingers and yanked it out, blood from my mouth pulling to the floor as he held the blade of his knife against it. “No no, none of that. Say one more thing and I'll cut that rancid little tongue of yours out of your mouth and feed it to you,” he hissed at me, pressing the blade down just hard enough to draw blood. “Do you know what it's like to see a planet turn into a tomb?" he asked me, gritting his teeth, “Do you know what it's like to see everything you've ever known crumble to ash and glass, all the life and the green stripped away leaving nothing but bones? I do. I've seen it happen to countless worlds, and my grandfather always told me stories of how you bastards did it to Earth. He still prays in its direction five times a day, to Mecca, but he knows the Kaaba is gone now, or maybe it's still there, buried in the bones of those who sought refuge there.”
I didn't care for the human’s nonsensical beliefs, but I did care to correct him. “I've seen it before, and I'll see it again. And so will you, it's inevitable. The Jurisdiction will always have its judgment fulfilled, there is no alternative.”
“One day, I hope we can rectify that,” he said, then he sheathed his knife and slammed my head against the metal floor with enough force to nearly knock me out. As I lost consciousness, I could hear him speak. “Take him to the Chop Doc, and make sure the cybernetics don't get damaged: they're supposedly more valuable than any bounty on this ship.”
Warning: Severe radiation poisoning detected. Flush system immediately.
Warning: Neural Lace removal detected, chance of neurological damage high. Proceeded with caution.

I hate how women treat me, it drives me fucking crazy.
I am a masculine gay man 22, I’m not flamboyant or anything of the sort, but I am very short (5’3 or 1.6 meters) but I work out like it’s may job. Anyways older women treat me like I’m their stereotypical gay best friend and young girls ( 16-25) treat me like I’m a lil soft cute twink. They are the same kinds of girls who read shit like heart stopper and think that that is how gay men work, one must be masculine and the other must be a uwu soft boy ( threw up in my mouth just writing that ) because how dare I be attracted to masculine men and be masculine myself, one of us must be the twink.
I’m just tired of high-school aged girls (my little sisters friends) asking me questions like if I have have ever worn a skirt or if I like to wear makeup. And women older than me wanting me to be their mystical gay friend who can answer all questions about men.
And don’t even get me started on bisexual girls my age. I don’t know what it is but they have a strange obsession with femboys and yuoi ( I think that’s how you spell it) They get mad when I don’t act the why they think I should act. Apparently a cute lil femboy twink is not supposed to dress like he’s homeless. There are even worse situations where they try to ask me out and then get mad when I say I’m into men. I’ve once had a girl say that she would wear a strap on, I just kinda looked at her like she was insane.
Older women (30-40)see me as just their gay friend not an actual person. They will just complain to me about men and how it is so hard to find a “good guy” or they will try to set me up on dates. And I can see how that is a nice gesture but I’m pretty sure they just see another gay man and set me up. I don’t think there is any other criteria other than gay.
I have more male friends than female friends for this reason they don’t seem to give a shit that I am gay and they just treat me like a regular dude not some cute delicate flower that need to be protected.
And the final point of this rant is women asking me about the men I have been with and then being disappointed by how low the number is and then bringing up hookup culture. I feel like I am a broken record when I have to explain I don’t have time for that. I am juggling to many things to have time for hookups. Also I have a think were I can only enjoy sleeping with someone on the condition I have known them for a long while. Let’s just say dating is a nightmare.
I’m not sure if I’m just surrounded by crazy people or this is a common occurrence amongst gay bros. Also sorry about any grammar errors or spelling I was writing this on my phone.
Edit: I am trying to get over my anger by ranting about it. I’m tired of being insecure about myself and how I look and act. I want to be able to live my life with out being angry about things that happened to me as a kid as a result of being smaller and gay. I’m just jealous of more flamboyant men being able to be confident. I’ve been keeping these feelings Since middle school and have been letting them fester for years and years which results in some unsavory behavior on my part, but I am trying to be better.

Hey friends,
Awesome night. Keep celebrating. Dare I say the vibes are immaculate. Etc. Just one quick thing...
The Thunder did not help us get Lively. I'm seeing this over and over commented in Mavs threads and threads on nba and it's a silly thing but it's driving me crazy.
We had 10, Orland had 11, OKC had 12. We were taking Lively at 10 with or without the Thunder. The Thunder wanted Cason Wallace but were worried he wouldn't get past Orlando at 11 since they were definitely targeting a guard; therefore, we traded BACK two spots with OKC. In exchange for us moving back, OCK took on the Bertans contract, which opened up the trade exception Nico would use later in the night to take on Holmes's money and the pick that became OMax from Sac.
We helped OKC Get Wallace. They helped us dump Bertans (and in that way they helped us get OMax)...but they did not help us get Lively. We were going to just take him at 10. With this trade, we got to get off of a bad contract, get flexibility for future moves, and STILL get the guy we were already getting anyway.
Small thing...but it's just been really killing me seeing it commented over and over.
Anyway...WE'RE GOING BACK TO THE WCF FOR THE 2ND TIME IN 3 YEARS BABYYYYY LET'S GOOOOOOOOOO!

So, we started dating a month ago. It started online, so we never met.
Idk how I ended up obsessed with him. He liked me a lot at first and we reciprocated feelings, but both were scared of LDR, so decided to stay platonic, but later ended up with the bf/gf tags. Idk how, but later he suddenly started backing off. Like we shared everything so he told me he don't feel like talking to me anymore when I complained about his ignorance towards me.
At first we thought it was cause he isn't a text person, cause he said he love calls with me. I tried calling as much as I could (I have a pretty strict family, so had to be careful).
Things went well, but we started having problems again. We thought that being casual is better so went that route (I always wanted something serious, but idk I went with this cause all I wanted was a way to keep him)
Five days ago when we were on call, he told me he want it serious. I asked him if he's going to be back at "I don't want this, it's difficult", he replied that he will be fine this time.
But his actions said otherwise, ignoring me, less calls and everything less from his side. He talked a lot before, initiated conversation more and well it was fun.
Now it felt like only me in the relationship, so I asked him to break up finally. He agreed, and I guess we really can't do LDR. I don't blame him cause it's not his fault for losing feelings, but I am pretty obsessed. I really did love him ig, like I just told him that I have moved on and "we were just teens that gave in lust and were never in love" (lust cause we sexted, a lot. I thought it was serious so I did. Now I feel like I lost something special for someone who will actually love me).
Idk what to do now, we decided that we are gonna stay friends cause we got too close and told each other a lot of things we could never open up about. I don't wanna stop talking to him and stay friends but move on too. I am super stuck in this.
I don't feel like crying over him, but I physically feel drained. It's like I am blank. Ik it's a stupid teen love and it's not a big deal, everyone have their teenage heart break (This was my first relationship), but Idk how to move on, like I always knew how I will love someone, how I will want to give everything, but I never thought of a possibility of break up. I was living in delusions of 'first and forever'. I did thought we will stay like that, cause we were perfect before, but all the ignorance and him being troubled keeping up is something I don't want. He do not deserve to not enjoy the relationship and just keep up with this. If I didn't mention 'break up' today, he might have kept going with the relationship.
It was always me who complained about 'less attention' and he did feel sorry. He felt sorry for tagging me along when he stopped feeling things. I somehow have not stopped feeling love for him. Whenever we decided to get back to friends, we somehow ended up being together and it never went well.
We talk a lot when we are not a couple, but as soon as we get back together, we start having problems. We can't always blame LDR right?? That's a lame excuse.
Idk how to move on now, he surely did, cause he had nothing to move on from (Again, I don't blame him for not reciprocating feelings, I guess I bought it on myself for falling like crazy)
So, dear redditors, please help me got off my first relationship. I am sorry for writing a lot, but yeah, help me out with this one.

I like crossovers, I like the idea of characters and powers colliding and having fun interactions.
But, in order for that to happen, you need to get the characters together. How do you do that?
I personally prefer the "world's collide" premise where universe crossing is a thing, because it prevents the characters' backstories and original shows from being messed with. BUT, there is an issue with this, which mainly comes from series with higher cosmologies, like DC and Marvel.
I was just doing a bit of wiki diving to get a sense to the Marvel and DC cosmologies. Both have their own pages on the Omniverse but before we get to that lets just look at the cosmologies
In Marvel, from what I have looked up (and this could be wrong/out of date so please correct me if I am) all the Universes (which should include all of the universes in the comics not just 616, all the movies, video games, and TV shows) all exist within the Superflow, and above that is the Neutral Zone, all of this is still within the Multiverse. Beyond that is the Far Shore and beyond that is the Outside/Mystery which contains the Overspace, the Beyond, the White Hot Room, the Land of Couldn't-Be-Shouldn't-Be, and the House of Ideas (where the One Above All is)
In DC, what I got was that all the Universes (again, every universe from the comics, TV shows, video games, and movies) are in the Orrery of Worlds surrounded by the Bleed, all contained in the Speed Force Wall, beyond which is the Sphere of the Gods (containing New Genesis, Apokolips, Heaven and Hell, Skyland and the Underworld, and Dream and Nightmare), Beyond which is Limbo, beyond that is the Monitor Sphere, and beyond that is the Source Wall (which got broken a little bit ago) beyond which is the Overvoid. Although I may be wrong on all universes being in the Orrery because I recall a few statements of there being a specific number of universes there (like 52) but then I wonder "What about the Snyderverse, Arrowverse, or the Animated Timmverse, or even the Arkhamverse? Where would they fit in?"
The point of all this is that these complex universes make me wonder if they are being considered when crossover happen, as we have had a few DC/Marvel crossovers, but what about the specific layers of reality.
In one of the DC/Marvel crossovers, Flash was able to head over to the Marvel-verse via vibrating to that dimension, using the whole "The universes occupy the same physical space just vibrating a different frequencies" explanation, but what does that mean for the greater multiverse? Where does Marvel's Earth exist in comparison to the DC Earth? Is one of them in the Marvel Superrflow or in the Orrery of Worlds?
Going outside of DC and Marvel, they have crossed over with a lot of stuff too, and those multiverses have crossed over with their own things as well. C has crossed over wth Mortal Kombat in MK vs DC, they recently had a RWBY crossover, Invincible swung over there and met Batman (he also met Agent Spider-Man), Batman encountered Spawn once, and then you got Teen Titans Go having that Crossover Nexus with Steven Universe, Ok KO, and the Ben 10 Reboot (there being a big Cartoon Network Multiverse) and Ben 10 has gone over to Generator Rex and there was one possibility that the Ben 10 universe could've interacted wth the Malgus universal cluster from the Transformers multiverse, and Transformers has crossed over with Marvel, and recently I learned that Marvel has crossed over with Doctor Who.
Now not EVERY crossover is canonical, they could be non-canon, or it could just be a cheeky reference, or the crossed over characters are just "That universe's/canon's version of those characters". That is just looking at crossovers that have been officially made by the official companies.
When looking at fanmade crossovers where characters are meeting, there becomes the issue of trying to fit in this cosmology. This doesn't just apply to DC/Marvel but any setting with higher cosmic laws.
If you are going to have the franchise you want to crossover take place on the same planet, you would now need to explain what the other characters were doing during the events of their series, especially if one of the shows' events have worldwide reach and aren't contained. Like if Ben 10 took place in the DC Universe, there would be SO many people who'd be getting involved with his stuff from the Omnitrix, to Vilgax, to the Highbreed stuff, etc.
If you are going to have them in the same multiverse, and this could even happen on the same planet, what about all these higher layers of reality that are the source of a lot of the crazy powers in comics? If you take another franchise for a crossover and imply that they are part of the grander DC/Marvel multiverse, then why haven't they ever had an encounter with stuff like the Speed Force, or the Lantern Corps, or anything special about DC's Cosmology, or in Marvel you got the X-Gene or the Phoenix Force. Now to be fair, it isn't like EVERY DC and Marvel story has those in them either, or at the very least not to the extent that we see them go in the comics. So having a crossover story be in the DC/Marvel Superflow/Orrery but not having any of the special stuff from those cosmologies MIGHT be okay but it gets weird if that series ALSO has its own higher dimensional layers.
And if you want to ignore all of that, say that the series you want to crossover is NOT a part of Marvel or DC in ANY way. How would they end up crossing over, because you now need to get through the massive layers of reality separating their multiverses from the outside (being the Outside/Mystery or the Overvoid)?
Sorry if you are annoyed by the Marvel/DC talk, they are just the easiest examples of "Super bullshit complex cosmology with lots of layers.
I just want to know if anyone else has thought about these kinds of things when making crossovers. I feel like the easy answer is just "Have them crossover and ignore all the higher dimensional BS", but I feel like that would just be ignoring a big part of the settings and leaves out a whole lot of fun stuff to talk about.
Again, I might've gotten some cosmology stuff wrong so please correct me if I did.

My older brother told my first boyfriend if he ever hurt me he would mess him up. He did hurt me and my brother didn’t do shit.
My first bf was always commenting on other women in our friend circle and how they had nice butts. He implied one day if I didn’t take him back after our breakup he was going to check himself out. Being a teen, not knowing better, I stayed until he date-graped me in college and then broke up with me a few months later and told all of our (mostly his) friends that I was toxic and I stalked him. Not even a little true…when I was crying at home the first time we broke up my dad knew what happened and screamed in my face “grow tf up, get outside and help with the yard sale!!”
My other brother who has autism (not the one that said he’d hurt my first bf), was inappropriate with me when I was 5 and my parents found out because I told them in the night and they yelled at him but in the following weeks he would stare up my skirts and I’d tell him knock it off and my mom would say “that’s your brother he has autism, be nice to him!”
my youngest brother, my bio cousin my parents adopted. Used to throw things at me and same response from parents “that’s your brother be nice to him! He’s a kid!”
I maintained a long distance friendship with a Mormon guy during college and didn’t have a car. After talking nearly every day he mentioned meeting up and seemed to be after more than being a friend. I told him I didn’t know if it would happen and we would see one another because I don’t have a car. He then got angry and told me “I’ll see you..at your funeral :) “ we were having a nice conversation when this happened and then he ghosted me.
My 2nd bf who I dated in college told me he was old fashioned and didn’t put relationship status on Facebook. Then he said he stays friends with all his exes. I allowed that to be fine and chose to see us as a casual dating situation and not so serious. He asked me about what house I would want to live in too and I scoffed because I’m not talking about the future with someone that still talks to his ex and won’t even tell people we’re dating. 9 months into dating he broke up with me over something petty and when I wouldn’t take him back he stalked me and body shamed me for being flat chested for years and still does to this day.
Last yr my stalker ex sent me a photo of a knife when I learned he is the one stalking me and confronted him in messages. I told My current bf of 6 years I live with that this happened and the next day I was having a panic attack because I saw a car same make and model as my ex used to own parked in front of our home. My now bf screamed at me and said “you’re fucking crazy! Nobody wants to hurt you”!! That same week he also told me even tho I was afraid for my life I would have to resign our lease in a couple months when it ends because it’s cheaper here than moving. Addresses where I live are public and online but if we moved I could use this program for dv victims to make it confidential. My bf was not having that. I don’t feel comfortable telling him about the stalking anymore and have been living inside my head my own personal hell now.
The police wouldn’t help because I didn’t have enough evidence of threats according to them and I became so depressed and scared. In February this year I saw my ex outside of my apartment just walking wearing a black hoodie.
He messaged on and off with angry spells the last year and I’ve felt like the only way thru it is by messaging him and giving him what he wants at the time, attention. If I stop talking to him he escalates.
He is now offering me $1000 for an eyelid biopsy o need to check for cancer which I’m worried about…and he’s saying he wants me to get a breast augmentation consultation in return for that. It’s so degrading and if I say no to him about anything he doesn’t take rejection well so I’m easing into the no.
My lease ends in 3-4 months and I cannot wait to get tf out of here.

Old throwaway account I still have access to... She uses Reddit, so I don't know if she'll find this or not, but anyway, I am honestly confounded by this situation and don't know what to do.
Backstory: I got into this relationship about a month ago. The girl is crazy over me and asked me to be her boyfriend after the first date. We had sex, drove, and showered together that night. She's nice but a red flag TBH. I didn't want a relationship due to various reasons, in all honesty, but she insisted, and I didn't want to hurt her. She graduated from school one year ago and so did I, and we are taking a break to figure things out. She's going to uni pretty soon, and I'm off to the military.
Not only that, but she told me she worked in a bar as a pianist. She also gives extra lessons to kids about math and other stuff. Then she started telling me more and more about her bar work (main income), and basically it comes down to this. She's an escort. It's a private establishment with a monthly subscription, and she accompanies old men (drinking, smoking, laughing...). I asked her: "Do you sleep with them?" to which she responded no. I'm okay with her work since we are both teens basically, and it's really hard to make money. The only thing I care about a relationship is honesty and not cheating.
Additionally, I myself have a very sexually active past, so I can't really judge her for that. We talked 2 weeks back about it, and she told me that she doesn't want to do that work anymore, and I told her: "great, I'm happy that you select a job that doesn't rely on you solely being a pretty young woman." She told me a couple of days after that she found a gig as a pianist, playing as a freelance artist. She also said her first day at work was coming up soon (now last Sunday). Furthermore, she told me it was a private concert at a house.
She came clean on Thursday and broke down crying that she went back to the bar and worked there again (Sunday). I asked her why she lied to me, and she said: "I never had such a good relationship, it's like I am trying to self sabotage it or smth, and I am really sorry I wanted you to find out."
What do I do in this situation? She lied, she broke my trust. It's not like I wasn't okay with her working there.

🪞
Welcome back to the Asylum write-up, where we explore the decade-long slow-motion car crash that is the Emilie Autumn fandom.
Sorry this installment took so long to upload! Just a heads-up, I may take some time to deliver the last one too – these posts take forever to format on Reddit's finicky-ass editor, and my dumb real life is currently keeping me from precious Internet time. Thank you for your patience! You have my word that everyone who pre-ordered the final installment will receive a PERSONAL, HANDWRITTEN letter autographed and illustrated by me, a list of the snacks I consumed while composing this write-up, some exclusive behind-the-scenes secrets, and a pony.
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4.1 – Part 4.2 Part 5

Places, everyone This is a test Throw your stones Do your damage Your worst, and your best (...) And if I had a dollar For every time I repented the sin And commit the same crime I'd be sitting on top of the world today (“God Help Me”, 2006🎵)

Quick recap of where we left off. First, there were five to ten halcyon years of pleasant and meaningful interactions between EA and her blossoming fanbase, prominently by way of her official forum. Then, circa 2009-2010, EA's online presence shifted towards sudden anger outbursts, ban-hammering, and an increasingly top-down communication style.
This created a sort of primordial rift within the fanbase, between those who supported EA's right to speak her mind and regulate her own fan spaces however she pleased – and those who thought that her reactions were rude and inappropriate (at best), and that even fan spaces should allow for reasonable, non-abusive criticism of the artist.
Between a poorly-handled book release (see Part 3), the controversial (Part 2) or dubiously true (Part 4) contents of said book, and serious shade from various former collaborators (Part 5), more and more fans had pressing thoughts about EA's work ethic and choices. EA attempted damage control through drastic forum rules that made it virtually impossible to voice any “serious” critical opinion. It didn't work, of course: instead of squashing the mutiny, she created a schism.
Critical fans and active haters started congregating on unofficial platforms.

“WITH MUFFINS LIKE THIS, WHO NEEDS ENEMIES?”: TROLL LIKE A GIRL

So here we were, the early 2010s. The official forum (which had about 700 members in 2006, if you recall) was now thousands-strong, reaching just over 12,000 registered users in 2012 – not all of them active, but still. In terms of sheer numbers and content creation, the party was POPPIN'... but increasingly in parts of the Asylum that escaped EA's jurisdiction, such as Tumblr, where they could speak their mind freely.

You play the victim very well You've built your self-indulgent hell You wanted someone to understand you Well, be careful what you wish for, because I do (“I Know Where You Sleep”, 2006🎵)

In one wing of Asylum Tumblr, a smattering of call-out blogs emerged, which laid out EA's various lies, faux pas, shitty takes, and general deep-seated terribleness in detailed timelines and screenshots (or, short of that, long-winded bullet points). While many such blogs framed it as “serious” whistleblowing and did their best to remain as fact-based and neutral as they could, there was some genuine disgust, animosity and creepiness towards EA on that side of Tumblr; for some ex-fans, “exposing the truth” was mostly justify obsessive hatred, prying and verbal abuse. Some, for instance, felt the bizarre need to side with EA's mother in their estrangement. (One user, with the URL “emilyautumnfischkopf”, argued in a serious and down-to-earth tone - but with zero sources - that EA's upbringing had been nothing but peaceful and supportive until she ungratefully kicked her loving family to the curb for no reason at all. They were later revealed 🔍 to have an alternate handle as “eaisalyingcunt”.)
Either way, through these blogs, a number of potential drama bombs that had mostly flown under the radar were dredged up from over the years – some of which were hard to ignore, even for supportive fans. Where to begin?
There was that nonsense in-joke song, captured twice on camera during the 2009 tour (to very little outrage, at the time), crassly called “Manatee Retard”📺. Or EA's scathing response, in print, to a wheelchair user who found it insensitive that she used a bedazzled wheelchair as a prop to do sexy acrobatics on stage. (“Your offence taken at my hard-won self-acceptance proves that I indeed have something to fight against”, she wrote). Spoken word tracks where she made trivializing knock-knock jokes about serious mental illnesses she didn't have, like schizophrenia and OCD. Multiple instances of calling Britney Spears a “bimbo” and a “Hollywood fucked-up”, resentfully claiming that she only shaved her head because she was “hopped up on drugs” and certainly not because she was “bipolar”, a word the press liked to wield as an insult anyway. (“That's almost like calling someone a retard!” Yeah, heaven forbid.) The meanest, most distasteful paragraphs in the book. Basically everything problematic EA had ever said or written.📝 In retrospect, it had been a long time coming, but it was a lot to take in – and certainly more off-putting, even to less emotionally invested fans, than silly lies about her age and last name.
In another wing of Asylum Tumblr, some fans had had it up to here and just wanted to have fun. 🎵 If Plague Rats had learned one valuable lesson from EA, it was how to crack a joke in the face of absurd tragedy – and the general state of the EA fandom certainly warranted a few.
In 2012, Fight Like a Girl was released. After six long years, three of which had been peaceful, the Opheliac era was officially over. The new album and ensuing tour confirmed that the Asylum had entered a process of glamorous Broadway-style militarization. 🎵📺
The mood board was “Roman general meets Vegas showgirl meets Victorian street urchin”.🪞 The color palette was, to naysayers, “musty pink and rotten, stale piss yellow”. 🐀 The keyword was “REVENGE” (through the power of... self-expression! sorority! brutal assault with rusty medical implements!). The chorus of the title song had an intriguing run-on line about getting “revenge on the world, or at least 49% of the people in it” 🎵 – which seemed like an awful lot, and was widely interpreted (to cheers, boos, or uncomfortable sighs) as a misandrist jab at literally all men on Earth.
The show was essentially a demo version of the musical, in that the setlist vaguely reflected the order of events in the story – but prior reading was essential in order to get what the hell was going on on stage. This one Broadway reviewer had not perused the literature before seeing the show 🔍, and hated: the set, the choreography, the skits, the plot, the lyrics, the music, the concept. (Seriously, you should read the review. It's not even my show and I feel like quitting show business.)
Pre-show VIP encounters, now violin-free, were lorded over by EA's new manager🐀, whose official title was “Asylum Headmistress”. (Interesting choice – she sounds fun!) The swag bags were less substantial than before, and the “greet” part of the meet-and-greet was rarely more than a quick hug and photo op.
On Twitter, EA continued to embrace her “I am very badass” fronting attitude...

Often wonder if cyberbullies r aware they’re fucking w/ a girl who’s BFs w/ maker of the SAW films & is marrying a knife-throwing scorpion. (🐀📝)

...and her taste for needlessly inflammatory statements. About an aisle sign in a supermarket:

If this does not infuriate you, then you're a fucking potato.

(Again with the confounding crypto-ableism, EA! 🔍) She also went through a phase of raging against Lady Gaga 📝, who had stolen her idea of using a wheelchair on stage as an able-bodied woman. 🔍 That failed to convince anyone that she wasn't the histrionic diva that haters made her out to be.
Spurred on by EA's rallying cries and “us vs them” mentality, loyalists turned the white-knighting up to 11. On Twitter, some Plague Rats got into cat fights with Lady Gaga's Little Monsters (what a time to be alive). Others tried to balance out the Tumblr negativity with initiatives like “Spreading a Plague of Love” – a “positive-only” confession blog, whose extreme fangirling, comically drastic rules and hyper-defensive tone📝 did not debunk the increasingly popular notion that “true Plague Rats” were a bunch of authoritarian and hopelessly brainwashed fanatics.
EA truthers and other anti-fans started lashing out at anyone who dared express any positive opinion of EA, solidifying claims that the backlash against EA was just a conspiracy of bitter, hysterical bullies.
All this to say: every passing day brought new reasons for fans to get mad at EA and each other, and everyone in the Asylum was in need of a laugh. It's not easy having a good time.🦠
Leading up to Fight Like a Girl and in the years that followed, user-submission-based meme blogs took off, most notably “Spreading a Plague of Lulz / Troll Like a Girl”. A lot of the early submissions were absurdist humor and toothless, cheezburger-Impact memes (a style that was, oddly, already dated at the time). Those often originated in good fun, and from loyal fans, on the official forum. But there was also true snark, satirizing EA's questionable ethics, outrageous claims, and easily spoofed artistic gimmicks. A new slang of Asylumspeak emerged: Glittertits (slight NSFW), GAGA!!, EA Gusta and all its memeface variants, Get outta mah house!, Are You Suffering?, Fight Like A Goat, [Random celebrity] copied EA (a subgenre in its own right), ...
Most of the “trolling” was directed at unrepentant bootlickers and, to a lesser extent, red-in-the-face haters and creeps. Meme blogs would post joke comments under “serious” or gushing submissions on Wayward Victorian Confessions, and taunt loyalist accounts by tagging them in their posts. When a few people complained on WVC that almost all of the Bloody Crumpets to date had been thin white able-bodied women, and a few fans responded by sharing their dream-casts for a more diverse line-up, the blog was flooded for days with confessions that “X should be a Crumpet” (candidates included RuPaul, Mitt Romney, Nicki Minaj, EA's therapist, and the WVC admins). Farcical shenanigans like that.
Ah, but some people will always cross the line, won't they. EA threads popped up on merciless, bully-friendly snark platforms like Lolcow, Pretty Ugly Little Liar, and Encyclopedia Dramatica. Snarkers with a mean streak and obsessive haters mingled in some of the more aggressive, 4-chan-spirited retaliation against EA – which would be called “brigading” in modern parlance. This included flooding EA's Goodreads page with one-star reviews (see part 4), repeatedly editing her Wikipedia page to include her legal name and birth year, and ensuring that Googling said name would bring up current pictures of her.
All of this compounded agitation fragmented the once-united fandom beyond recognition.🦠 Through substantial disagreements among fans, personal bickerings, layers upon layers of inscrutable in-jokes, and cross-platform telephone games, the Asylum morphed into a booby-trapped Escher room.
Satire blogs were taken in earnest. Earnest fan blogs scanned as satire. Memes would get called out as abuse. Appreciation without attached criticism would get mocked as bootlicking. Obvious jokes made by EA would be taken at face value. One divisive confession could trigger days and days of debate, to the point that WVC eventually banned confessions in response to other confessions. New waves of infighting created a confusing web of rival sub-factions🐀, each accusing the others of being toxic, cliquish, and delusional.
The shared fantasy was broken, the collective vision had crumbled, no onez was speaking the same language anymore. Fans would jump down the throat of other fans who held almost identical views about EA, except for that one thing she said or did that one time. Everyone had differing thoughts on what should or shouldn't acceptable to discuss, question, excuse, make fun of.
War is hell.

SCORCHED EARTH SHENANIGANS: HONEY, I SHRUNK THE ASYLUM

Would you tear my castle down Stone by stone And let the wind run through my windows Till there was nothing left But a battered rose? (“Castle Down”, 2003🎵)

Haters vs sycophants is not really the kind of conflict where one side can come out on top (if you're participating, you've already lost). But in the long tug-of-war between “grassroots” and “EA-sponsored” fan spaces, the ultimate winner is obvious – in that the former is gasping in agony, a shriveled husk of its former glory, while the latter... is non-existent. This is due in no small part to EA's tendency, like the Czars of old, to settle conflicts by setting Moscow on fire.🔍)
That's not entirely fair: unlike EA, the czar only did it that once.
By early 2013, as EA was gearing up for her third Fight Like a Girl tour at the end of the year, the official forum was... not as lively as it once had been. Not just because of the stifling rules and disgruntlement towards EA, or because EA herself hadn't really posted anything on there in years; the Internet was also changing, and forums in general were fast becoming passé.
This made it difficult for EA to create a safe space where she could talk to fans, and fans could talk to and about her, in a way she deemed suitable (ie, a space she could gate-keep and regulate enough to keep it completely free from negative criticism). Social media was a minefield; she still posted regularly, but didn't interact very much. So EA and the Headmistress came up with a way to filter out the unbelievers: an official fan club📝, aptly called the “Asylum Army”, with a $100 entry price.
Joining the AA came with a dog tag, a sew-on patch, and a lifetime membership certificate signed by EA and – for some reason – the Headmistress. (Unlike EA's best friend and sound engineer back in the forum's heyday, I don't think fans ever really embraced the FLAG-era manager as part of the Asylum in-group. She came across more as a coordinator / businessperson / adult chaperone, at best.🐀) So, slightly better goodies than you'd get by joining the other AA 🔍 ... but not by much. The main appeal was that members would have access to exclusive content, special merch, giveaways, early bird tickets for future shows, and regular video chats with EA.
The concept itself drew a fair amount of criticism, as you can imagine. Between the name🐀, the price, and the inherent gatekeeping of a pay-to-join fanclub, many balked at the monetizing of a concept that had once (like, three years back) been significantly more DIY, grassroots, and inclusive. 📝🐀
Then again, many also longed for a positive, drama-free space where fans could just be fans. And while the creation of the AA was generally recognized as a quick cashgrab, a lot of people were surprisingly cool with it. EA was trying to finance her dream musical, after all – although a number of fans wished she had gone about raising funds in a less sketchy way.
So around 400 fans shelled out (which, according to the Headmistress📝, “basically cover[ed] the cost of running the fanclub itself – keeping the database up, website, etc.”). Enough for a close-knit, but sizable community. But already, there was a conflict of interest: a high fanclub entry fee essentially demands that you pledge loyalty to the artist over loyalty to your fellow fans, who wish to join but can't afford to. Sharing, caring, and ensuring no one felt left out were some of the more positive values cultivated in the fandom... but leaking exclusive content would surely piss off other paying members🐀, and make EA feel betrayed all over again. (And she had barely just started to mellow out on social media!)
...But then again, this is the internet. After the first month of secret AA drops (lyric sheets, some photoshoot outtakes – nothing too juicy, really), there were, yes, some leaks. EA was predictably miffed, and retaliated by... ghosting the fanclub for weeks at a time in its first few months of existence (great look!). She eventually found the “solution” to her problem, by providing something you couldn't right-click-save (and which had been part of the promised perks to begin with): live interaction.
Over webcam, she was her usual in-person bubbly, charming, funny self. Everyone seemingly had a good time during the fanclub video chat, and this gave people faith and hope.
There were a few more events, giveaways, etc. As promised, ahead of the fall 2013 tour (the last one to date, it would turn out), AA members got priority access to show tickets and VIP bundles. The latter were much pricier than before, and only included soundcheck, a photo-op, and three goodies: a tin of loose-leaf tea, a signed printer-paper setlist, and a small flag that said “F.L.A.G.”.🔍 Some stuff continued to leak – but, as some of the outlaws pointed out (scroll down to the Disqus comments), they were mostly relaying information that was relevant to the entire fanbase, such as updates about ongoing projects (the dragged-out recording of the audiobook, for one).
In early 2014, lifetime memberships were closed, and replaced with monthly, quarterly and yearly subscription tiers. Bizarrely, you ended up paying $3 more per month if you bought a $99 yearly subscription📝 – but it did include the patch, dog tag, and piece of paper!

Sometimes I kind of want to be part of the cool kids and register to the Asylum Army. Then I remember how it came about, what you could get for the same price a couple years ago, how the whole thing was and is handled, and that I won’t support any of this bullshit. (And then I roll around naked in all the money I’m saving.) (🐀)

Still, a number of fans rejoiced at the affordable monthly option, and joined – if not for the exclusive content and merch (which were... okay, but not much to write home about), then for the friendly, drama-free exchanges with an artist they actually did love, in spite of all the frustration.
For the still-too-poor or still-undecided, there was always the forum! It wasn't as active as it used to be, but a few die-hards still managed to keep the lights on... until, inevitably, Someone Did Something and Ruined Everything. (Once again: EA's wrath is spectacular, but rarely completely unprovoked.) The incident features one notable figure in the Asylum community. Let's call him the Collector.
OK, so maybe you remember the meme I linked to in Part 4, with Christian Grey and the ginormous EA hoard. Well, that's the Collector's collection. The “Violin” promo that I called the "Holy Grail of the fandom" in the same paragraph? Also his. The handwritten lyrics that went for $940? Guess who won that auction. Over the years, the Collector had probably spent five figures on EA merch and shows, and although that fact was a little unsettling, he was a very active, easy-going, and generally well-liked fixture of the fandom.
One day in 2012, shortly after the Headmistress had replaced EA's old Chicago BFF as main forum admin, the Collector's account got banned or restricted over something dumb. When the ban wasn't lifted as quickly as he hoped, he took it... the way one takes things when one is unhealthily invested: he started spamming Headmistress and the mod team with increasingly rambling and abusive emails (lost to time, probably for the best). When that didn't work quickly enough, he tried a different route.
One of the many auctions that the Collector had won, some years prior, was EA's old iPod Touch📝 – which contained all of her favorite tunes and, buried somewhere in the data cache... a phone number. Which the Collector tried calling. And wouldn't you know it: EA picked up. She congratulated him on his sleuthing skills, listened patiently as he made his case, apologized for any distress caused by the unfair account restriction, and then they got married.
Kidding! She freaked the fuck out, hung up, and banned him for life from the forum and all EA shows and events.
After his ban, the Collector allegedly still tried to attend at least one VIP pre-show (one source in the comments says he was allowed to buy some merch, refunded for his ticket, and escorted out). He joined the Reform forum to bitch about EA and try to rally people to his cause, possibly made revenge posts about her on darker snark forums, and continued to hound the Asylum mod team. So in June 2014, EA came up with a radical and unexpected fix to the Collector problem.

The official Asylum Fan Forum has been shut down permanently. I have personally paid thousands of dollars each year to keep the forum safe and secure for you ... Unfortunately, the forum has not been kept safe and secure for me, a truth which disappoints me greatly, instead becoming a place where people who have physically threatened myself and my staff prey upon forum members, pressuring them to contact me and my staff on their behalf. If the gullible wish to humor my stalkers (who live in their parent’s basement at age 30 something) and thus put me in danger, they may do it on their own dime. They may also fuck off, because stupidity can kill, and I won’t be your victim. To those who enjoyed the forum, you know who to thank for its closure. (“On the closing of the Asylum Forum”)

Voilà! This is how a decade-long archive of shared history ends: not with a bang, but with a dirty delete and a sod-off communiqué.
The obliteration of the forum took everyone by surprise...

I was actually on the forum when it was taken down. I was navigating between posts and when I went to click on a different board, an error message came up. I honestly cried a little, I'm not ashamed to say. (WVC admin on Reddit, 2024)

...and I do mean everyone:

Chicago BFF / ex-admin, the next morning: Whoa, EA forum shut down? Ex-mod: It turns out that if someone spends enough years actively “waging war” to destroy what they can’t have, eventually they’ll be successful. * eye roll * Not even mods got prior warning. Just all the sudden, poof, gone. BFF: Really? She did not let the moderators know?! This is sounding worse and worse. Uggh. I’m so sorry. Such a loss. (...) Ok, threats are serious, but why not just put it in archive mode so no one can post? (...) Sad. I shall light a candle in the forum's honor. (Facebook posts; scroll down for screenshots)

It was a gut punch, especially for people who had poured countless hours into the community, or could have used some prior warning to save years of their own writing from the role-playing threads. One last chance to take a look around the place that had meant so much to so many.

From the wording of the announcement of closing the forum and a number of other things, it sometimes seems like EA doesn't like her fans much. :/ (🐀)

Three months after the forum was nuked, Battered Rose (a venerable EA fansite, which had been around since the Enchant era and had one of the most complete EA galleries online) announced that it was shutting down too.📝 The admin, who had also been a long-time forum mod, cited a lack of “time, energy, passion, or money” to keep the website going... and being upset at the sudden disappearance of the forum. It was, truly, the end of an era for the Asylum.
...Well, no point in living in the past. For those who could afford it, and still wanted to talk to/about EA after that (not everyone did 🐀), there was always the Asylum Army fanclub!
Over the summer of 2014, EA held regular live chats and Q&A's, and... many attendees really enjoyed them, and thought the AA was well worth the money after all. She also quietly parted ways with the much poo-pooed Headmistress around that time.

Just spent over 4 hours giggling, drinking tea and playing guessing games in chat with EA and other Asylum Army members ... No griping, no downers, just lots of fun. I think I like the way the ‘new fandom’ is going and now I’m really glad I finally decided to join the Army. (September 4, 2014🐀; Battered Rose had closed the day before)

The forum was lost forever, but perhaps that was a chance for a fresh start. Could this fanclub thing really be the Asylum Renaissance that fans had been longing for?

...I have come today to a very difficult but necessary decision, and that is to discontinue the Emilie Autumn Official Fanclub. The site itself, and the community chatroom, will remain open to you indefinitely, but I will no longer be making updates to the site. (Newsletter, September 8, 2014📝)

...Never mind, then.
Turns out the fanclub had been the Headmistress' idea all along. EA had been reluctant from the start, and although she really enjoyed the live chats with a safe community of people “who are there for the right reasons”, she couldn't overcome her fundamental discomfort with the concept. Lifetime and regular members would receive a bunch of digital downloads and a -35% coupon on the Asylum Emporium for their troubles. EA said she would definitely pop back once in a while for live chats, for free, just for fun, but to my knowledge, she never did.
And so the most devoted fans were left standing in the rain...

She is happy, she made it. She is fulfilling her dreams, found love and happiness after all the pain. I understand that she now doesn’t need “us” anymore ... That doesn’t change the fact she broke my heart with taking the Asylum Army and the forum from me. Yet, I am happy for her. (🐀)

...while naysayers pointed and laughed, Nelson-style.🦠

I don’t feel sorry at all for the people that paid for the Asylum Army fan club. Most of them knew that EA is an atrocious business woman and has broken many promises before. In fact, I laugh at them. They seriously thought that EA would actually stay consistent with this? (🐀)

EVERYTHING MUST GO: THE ASYLUM WHOLESALE

EA fans were left without an “official” home for about three years. This gave them plenty of time to be annoyed at EA for: not releasing the audiobook on time, not materializing any new project for a while... and the new sin of peddling random, ridiculously marked-up AliBaba jewelry as “merch” on her official store. Think faux-antique cameo pendants and $30 Big Ben rings (...because the Asylum story is set in London, get it?).

The whole accessories section looks like a tacky overpriced English souvenir shop. (🐀)

The fanbase lost a lost of steam in those in-between years, because there wasn't much to stick around for. As evidenced by the positive reception of the AA live chats, even in the midst of unresolved drama, out-loud interactions in a friendly environment have always been EA's saving grace. Considering the amount of online hate, there are shockingly few accounts of bad IRL encounters with EA: most people say that in live conversation, she comes across as a fun, warm, and genuinely sweet person. Some report that their negative opinion shifted after meeting her.
But there were no chats or live shows anymore. There was only social media, where she ignored questions and vague-posted about overdue projects – and the newsletter📝, which was all saccharine love-bombing to promote bland dropshipped trinkets. For fans who remembered the handcrafted merch (and two-way communication) of the early years, it was a bitter pill to swallow.

CONTINUED IN COMMENTS

​