"Asking for a friend after recent opinions showed me a different way to deal with these crooks."
They've used dabble on and off for over 6 months. provided all verification upon sign-up and has lost quite a bit since then, withdrawn various amounts but significantly in the red all-time. Never had an issue previously but they've paid out all withdrawals prior, withdrew $515 overnight and woke up in the morning to this:
This is a courtesy email in regards to your account. We are needing to further verify your account, as part of our Advance Customer Due Diligence in relation to accounts with Dabble.
We need you to verify the following:
Asking for sensitive info such as full bank statements, pictures of all credit/debit cards/passport/medicare/ID all with selfies while holding them.
After back and forth they've sent this as the right to withholding winnings.

12. Fraud

12.1 We reserve the right to withhold deposited funds and/or winnings from settled bets should we determine that a deposit or withdrawal has been made fraudulently. Any matters of inappropriate or fraudulent use of any deposit method will be reported to the relevant authority. Your Account may also be closed. 12.2 Dabble Sports may employ third party technologies to track and store technical information on the device that Customers choose to use. Customers accept that this data may be used to reach decisions on investigations where Accounts have been operated in a manner which is contrary to these Rules or applicable laws, including but not limited to Account takeover, bonus or betting abuse, multiple Account operations, and payment fraud. 12.3 Dabble Sports reserves the right to close the Accounts of, and void any or all bets made by any person, group of people or corporation in an attempt to defraud Dabble Sports. 12.4 Dabble Sports may periodically review Accounts to monitor any activity that it might consider unusual. Dabble Sports reserves the right to suspend an Account pending an investigation, without notice. 12.5 Dabble Sports does not permit beneficial owners that are not the registered account holder, or any arrangements or schemes that do or may facilitate this. Where we reasonably suspect a third party beneficial owner, we reserve the right to close the Account and/or void any resulted or pending bets on your Account.12. Fraud
Just wanted to get some clarity about this, is this even enforceable? How can you claim fraud after 6 months of account usage?
TLDR : Blocked account and withdrawal requesting sensitive info, now citing fraud when questioned about it
What does everyone here think? I've suggested my opinions but i'm not a lawyer let alone trained in anything.

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I have been on the waitlist at my current complex to move into a first floor apartment. They messaged me last Friday saying that the unit directly below me is opening up August 1st so they have to get their cleaning/ inspection done so after that they give me the keys! My new lease will start on the 1st of September but they said that I can have a few weeks to move and pack up. This is SUPER exciting for me especially since I hate the stairs after my surgery and I’ll also get a lot more “patio” space than my current balcony.. which is what my dog and I are most excited about! I plan on moving my bigger stuff off the patio since it’s not a super far drop. ( I won’t throw important stuff… i guess haha) But that’s how we got our bed set and larger stuff up here in the first place, had someone lift it up so we could easily grab it. I had kinda a crazy idea of using a pulley system but before I spend money is that a good idea, or should I just deal with stairs?? I would also order more moving tote bags (they’re nice to have anyways sometimes!) and I have some huge bins/ more totes I can also pull out and use.

I 23(F) worked for an 80(M) Dentist for about 3 years, and what I observed and endured as an employee during that time traumatized me and made me quit dental assisting in general, not because I didn't like it but because I loved it just not the dentist and I'm going to just break it down the best I can.
Starting off this specific dentist is really well known in my city, he has been practicing for 50 years now. However not much has changed in that 50 years. His office is so old that patients will come in from 1989 and say how not a single thing has been updated or changed. The floor is carpeted with rotting wood underneath and he just doesn't care. He has like creepy dolls all around the office and creepy clowns. I almost feel like he won't change anything because he wants to still feel like he's in his prime like it's the 80's/90's still.
He denies the fact that he's getting older, he says he is 44 years old when physically and literally he is not. So maybe this is some type of symptoms of a disorder. This is just some background so you can understand the full picture.
So he only hires women of lighter complexions, also certain body size, small not to skinny but curvy but not too big. You have to have long blown out hair that's always fixed, his old rule used to be that you could not wear your hair up bc it's not appealing to him. Also you can't wear glasses for the same reason. If you were trying to get a girl to work there he would have to see a picture of her first and she couldn't have tattoos or "bad teeth" even though he would put braces on staff members for free and I witnessed that, if it was "too much" the person would be a no for him. Even having a simple nose ring was against his rules.
I started working for him when I was 19 turning 20. So I was pretty young and didn't really realize until later that all of this was just so toxic and it gets worse.And so when I found out my pregnancy was healthy I announced it and they decided to not train me on patients for pretty much my entire pregnancy because they thought i would just have my baby and leave
After being post partum and working while also being a first time mom to a baby, I begin to lose a lot of weight because I guess I was stressed. I went from being my normal weight 135 to 116 pounds.
The doctor would comment on my body and say things about my weight loss in front of patients. It made me very insecure and uncomfortable two things I have never felt in my life at a job. I started to have body dysmorphia from working for this man. When he looked at me it felt as if he was staring through me and picking me apart. And no one should I have to feel like that in the work place.
I fell into a deep depression because feeling like I can't go find a new job because as terrible as it sounds, I was attached to the toxic abuse cycle there. He would love bomb and compliment you so heavily that you almost felt bad for thinking of leaving cuz he was so old. He would say things like how much he loved your personality, you were the best employee, best with patients. It was definitely creepy. Also I felt as if I were to try to leave he would be upset or it felt like I was breaking a trusted bond. So I continued working and things...got worse
Enough about my personal experience but now for the patients.The doctor treated each patient nothing more than a dollar sign. Unless they were a known person in the community, a family friend, he would give them treatment but if they had questions or concerns about their teeth he would be very dismissive, and if they argued back he would pretty much belittle them and make them feel like they were stupid for asking a question. Saying what they wanted was "impossible" because that's "the way their teeth were". I watched him take braces off of patients and their teeth were still not aligned properly, I watched him accidentally set a patient on fire, I watched him give a girl bone loss, she lost her tooth because of something he did incorrectly.
Not to mention his entire staff has not been to any type of dental school, every single person hired basically with no experience. I was told because he couldn't "afford it", yet the man has multiple million dollar homes and luxury cars....
To even scam us further he sent us to take a super lax unsupervised "test" that he said would make us certified assistants. Came to find out that was nothing more than a piece of paper.
Not to mention probably more things he has done, like practicing half blind, also urinating on himself daily and it being reported and nothing done about it.The sterilization was absolutely horrifying. Their method is not to use an autoclave but to throw all dirty instruments in a basket and throw them in an old machine that had sterilization and water and put them through an oven baking them.
Also cold sterile which was not monitored properly, and did not soak for 24 hours. Sometimes 5-10 minutes. I just got so tired of not only him being misogynistic, but not caring for health and safety of patients, or even staff members.
And the rest of the current staff members, my heart does hurt for them for them to be in this kind of abusive cycle for so long and not want to remove themselves and realize they deserve better. This kind of environment should not be normalized. And I've watch him say god awful things about every single one of them behind their back and it's honestly sad. Why would you stand by this especially for the incredibly low amounts of pay.
Making yourself look weak to him while he sits back and laughs. It's really sad and I pray for them. And I'm telling the truth and stand by it on everything I say. No I did not get fired, I quit the job. Because I couldn't take the negativity any longer. But the more I think about it the more it angers me for people that give their money to this man.
Im currently enrolled in the Dental Hygiene program at a college. I'm really excited to become a an RDH but the thing is I'm scared working for him and just cold quitting will ruin my career. Also My question is should I report him to OSHA?

After many years of scrimping and saving, I've managed to obtain my very own bottomless money pit apartment on the outskirts of Sydney. So, naturally I believe it's a rite of passage for me to attempt putting up a shelf.
I have two main (of a billion) questions. Firstly, I understand that electrical and plumbing work need to be performed by a licensed tradesperson. I watched one episode of Better Homes and Gardens 22 years ago, and it's always stuck in my memory. Also, the best lamb recipe in the cooking segment - but I digress.

1. I want to put up a shelf in the ensuite. I put on big boy pants and went and bought a drill and seemingly one of every single drill-bit that Bunnings sell. I'm looking forward to cracking my first tile, but I am not looking forward to nicking a pipe or cable, or the ultimate scrotum shriveller - nicking both simultaneously. There is already a towel rack on that wall, so there's hope for my grand plan. What I'd like to know is if there is a resource that's easily understood by a common idiot about building codes and stuff so I might have a general idea of where the pipes are? Such as "all pipes must be installed at XX height from blah blah" so I can avoid calling an emergency wrench wielding crack displayer. I got a good quality stud-finder from the green tin roof temple, but somehow it's tells me everything and nothing is a stud at the same time. The instructions said to place my other hand on the wall, but I don't buy into all that astrology and crystals mumbo jumbo.
2. Many of my power points and light switches are looser than a stool after a sweaty evening session down at the local vindaloo dispensary. I have a feeling the previous owner felt themselves a bit handy and may have grabbed a 10 pack of Shenzhen house igniters from the Reject Shop and whacked them in the walls himself. Going by number of dodgy wall outlets and the empty little bag of drugs I found under the sink on settlement day, it's probably likely that's the case. Is there such a thing as, like, an electrical audit? Can a sparky come in and replace the outlets and tell me that the wiring is safe without having to pull all the gyprock off?

Lastly, is there a reputable way to find good area-local tradies apart from wildly googling and looking at every website that can afford good SEO. My distaste of being stung by service people is only second to that of bees and wasps, and it's happened to me before when I fell for a flashy Squarespace template. I'm happy to reasonably pay for deft hands with tools rather than web design.
TL;DR Mildly ambitious smoothbrain bought a drill and wants to know how to not fuck up his property.

• best way to not drill a hole into a pipe
• advice on getting electrical problems fixed
• simple resources for building codes and finding reputable tradies
• lamb

Hi, I've been a Corki main since S10, and I've held a ~62% winrate in over 400 games over that time period. I'm writing this post because Corki is about to get reworked and while the rework isn't absolutely horrible, the issue with Corki in pro play is misdiagnosed. TLDR: the issue with Corki in pro is not and has never been because of package. It is solely because of the AP Poke Corki build.
History:
On patch 5.22, Corki was reworked to add Package on his passive (on a 300 second cooldown). On patch 6.15, the package cooldown was reduced to 240s, and then stayed in the same form for ~6 years until 12.3, when it nerfed back to a 300s cooldown and a 2 minute delayed spawn.
Corki has been a on and off pick in pro play for the last few years now. From S6-S11, he was meta from time to time, hitting up 28% presence in S6 (combined mid+adc), S7, and S9, but being mostly unpicked S8, S10, and S11. During this same period of time, he was always a strong solo queue pick, usually hovering between 52% and 56% winrate mid, but with a low pick rate, and always built AD. In season 12, the AP Poke Corki build (Ludens + Tiamat + First Strike) was discovered in pro play, and was quickly picked up by solo queue players. His solo queue winrate dropped spectacularly to hover around 47%, but he was still decent with the AD build in solo queue. AP Corki was nerfed in patch 12.13, and disappeared from pro play (while also being relatively weak in solo queue) until S14. In S14, the newly released items led to another AP Malignance + Eclipse build, which once again terrorized pro play, and Corki was hit with more package nerfs.
Sources: Corki Patch History and Corki pro play presence
On AP Poke Corki:
It's way better in coordinated play than solo queue and has been for years, it's always ~4-5% lower winrate in solo queue. When the AP Corki build first started being played in pro, his winrate crashed in solo queue. The reason the playstyle is good in pro is because you actually get proper setup before teamfights at drakes and stuff, while in solo queue you have to be ready to fight whenever. Teams also won't wait for you to poke, or even play around package, even in high diamond. Imo package also doesn't synergize well with poke Corki, because once you use it, you can't poke anymore, and you're usually in an awful position. This is more fine on AD Corki because you can usually nuke their mid/adc and trade when you go in, but on poke, dueling power sucks so you lose more often/get run down. Also, if you dont land rockets on the backline, you're basically useless, since you can't really deal with tanks. If you land your rockets on AP Corki, you deal ridiculous amounts of damage from really far, and can instantly win a teamfight for your team.
Regarding package:
Honestly, I'm relatively sympathetic to the idea that package is slightly unhealthy for the game, simply because of how powerful it is, so I understand it's removal. You can int the entire game on Corki, and have one good package, and instantly win. I'd love to hear if any pros have talked about this, but I believe that pro players have been using package incorrectly until recently. You want to use it across their entire team (often suiciding into their backline), and then using W/Flash to get away because everyone you hit is chunked hard. In the last few months, I've seen some Corkis (especially Faker and Chovy) use package this way, with a lot of success. Package is a really difficult ability to use well, because you are locked in and unstoppable as soon as you use it, and if you barely miss someone, or knock them the wrong way, it's the difference between instantly popping a carry, and them instantly popping you. I believe that ASol's transformed ult (Skies Descend) is much more unhealthy for similar reasons. However, package is not the reason why Corki is obnoxious in pro play, as he was a perfectly fine pick in pro play for 6 years, before AP Corki even existed. There will multiple years where he had the same package, but was rarely picked in pro, even while being a very strong solo queue pick.
Regarding the rework:
I believe that the R changes are quite good, and make a lot of sense to force Corki to attack to get rockets, rather than poking at 1300 range, although 4 ammo might be too few. I'm relatively neutral towards his change to physical damage. It should remove the ability to build Malignance/Ludens, which I believe are the core problem with Corki in competitive. However, the removal of package is unnecessary to Corki's ability to be a healthy solo queue and competitive pick, and removes one of the big differentiaters of skill on Corki. I'm guessing that Corki will be slightly stronger than before, but still relatively weak compared to other champions, and I hope Riot don't forget about him after the rework.
TLDR: AP Poke Corki bad (for pro play and solo queue and overall game health), package good (has not historically been the issue with Corki, and good skill expression)

Freelancing can be an incredibly rewarding career path, offering flexibility, independence, and the opportunity to work on a variety of projects. However, to succeed as a freelancer, you need the right tools to manage your business efficiently. Whether you are a seasoned freelancer or just starting out, having a well-stocked toolkit is essential. In this blog post, we will explore some must-have tools that every freelancer should consider incorporating into their workflow. At the forefront of our list is Feedcoyote, a comprehensive tool designed to streamline and enhance your freelancing experience.

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Feedcoyote is a powerful platform tailored specifically for freelancers. It offers a range of features that help you manage your projects, clients, and finances seamlessly. Here’s why Feedcoyote should be your go-to tool:
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Conclusion

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I know I should be talking with my partner about this but I like to lurk on the internet. So my current predicament needs some background. Roughly two years ago I was in a serious relationship for 7 years and my gf at the time (I’m a male) came out to me as gay and moved across the country not too soon after telling me ( we shared a house together and we weren’t married). I think we ended amicably at the end but it still hurt me. During that time I owned a home and hated my job. All of the above occurred in the summer of 2022. As soon as I quit my job and sold my house I started to an accelerated medical program also in 2022. This is where my issue starts. A girl I know we’ll say her name is “Tamara” asked me to be FWB.
Tamara knew me from the previous job but in process of her moving up in the company she moved to South Carolina. I currently live up north in the US. So she got in contact with me and wanted to come to the place I moved back to, to come and visit. I said sure because we were pretty good friends. (I want to add the medical program I’m in gives me the ability to work anywhere in the US so I can chose where I complete my clinical hours. This comes into play later).
The first visit nothing happened between us. In between visits she asks to be FWB I say yes but tells me it can be messy. I agree. This goes on for a year and a half. Mid way point last year because our relationship was just exclusively FWB we discussed at the beginning that we were free to seek other people out. So I went on few dates. Tamara was not happy with me so I ended up stopping the dates in between her visits. At the point when I stopped the dates I was about to start my clinical rotations and I had an interview for a site coming up. I was unable to get matched in an area near South Carolina which is what Tamara wanted so we could be close. I matched at a place up North an hour from me. So throughout my clinical rotation Tamara has been “gently” encouraging me to move in with her in South Carolina.
I have some concerns about moving because I know the area is saturated for the medical job I have and it’s damn near impossible for new grads to get work. So I press on through the program. 1/3 of the way through. I get a message saying we need to talk. I get a phone call from Tamara saying she has an STD and I should get checked. Needless to say I was not happy. A week later I got checked and had it also. I was beside myself. I knew I was being an idiot and I know people make mistakes but I definitely got checked after our encounters but I digress. After this things seemed to have cooled a little. With news of the STD I told her fuck it I’ll just move down after I graduate but I’m still struggling with the idea of fully committing to moving there because of the struggles I will face. Now currently I have a few weeks left of my program and I want to change my mind about moving down and I know it will break her heart but I was doing what was right for her and not for myself. So would I be the asshole for calling things off and staying put to get work experience?
TLDR: I ended a long term relationship. I got into medical school that allows me to work anywhere in the US. An old co-worker hits me up to hang but we live in different states. We become FWB. I get an STD from our interactions which soured my mood a little. I tell her I will move down to be closer to date but now I want to take it back because I know how hard it will be to get a job where she lives currently and I’m not sure I can commit to the things she wants.
Thanks for reading and sorry for any typos! I am writing this pretty late at night.

I don't need to tell anyone here that housing affordability is bad right now so I'll cut to the chase...
What can be done about it?
I got seven proposals to address the problem.
But first.. lets talk about what I call 'Non-Solutions'.
A Non-Solution is something that feels like a solution but isn't. For example: Scratching at itchy skin isn't a solution to a rash.
There's a few Non-Solutions I'm going to be avoiding with my proposals:

• Price Fixing: Simply mandating that X costs $N, at a government level, doesn't fix anything. Ask USSR. Prices determined by markets are not 'fair', but they are realistic outcomes to the situations which created them, whether it's a lack of regulation, lack of supply, etc. High prices are a symptom of bigger problems that need to be addressed.
• Free Money: While it seems like an easy fix, just handing out money until everyone can afford everything, you don't need to be an economist to know that doesn't work. Prices are a function of purchase power. If you increase everyone's purchase power equally, prices will adjust to match. We've all seen this, the inflation we're experiencing right now in Australia is likely a direct outcome of the spending during the pandemic.

Instead solutions need to be formed through means such as:

• Using the tax system to incentivise behaviour that results in cheaper housing, and de-incentivise behaviour that results in more expensive housing.
• Adjusting laws that result in more expensive housing, removing laws that are an obstacle to cheaper housing.
• Creating alternatives to the existing housing stock in the market.
• Government initiatives that increase housing stock.

So - what could we do?

Proposal 1 - The AAHC

I call it the 'Australian Affordable Housing Construction Company', aka, AAHC Co.
Government initiated housing construction company, similar to the NBN Co.
It has one goal: Build houses and sell them. It has a target rate of 'houses/quarter' it aims to construct houses at. That rate is set by an independent body that aims to keep the cost of housing to a fixed level relative to incomes, and controlled in a fashion similar to the official interest rate. Another lever on the economy. The rate increases when housing supply is low, and decreases when housing supply is high.
The AAHC builds houses. Then sells them. Simple as that. No other purpose. The goal is to break even, build houses, sell them at market value (no profit). The great thing is, this means the AAHC has a net zero funding cost for the tax payer - literally costs nothing to run, because it pays for itself through sales of houses.
The actual construction would be done by external private construction companies under contract who compete under bids to build suburbs worth of houses in large projects. Which is another benefit. Lots of jobs creation, a big boon for our local manufacturing and construction industry, and any related employment opportunities (construction companies don't just hire builders after all, they hire graphic designers, accountants, managers, receptionists, etc).
As additional benefit, because the government is building the houses, it can ensure the houses meet conditions and standards we the people want to see applied to future housing construction. So it could be mandated for example, every new home constructed must have air conditioning, must have solar panels, etc.
The AAHC Co in summary:

• Allows for a market based approach to control the cost of housing.
• Costs nothing (to the taxpayer) to run, self funded.
• Reduces the single largest expense we have in life (housing).
• Would create tens of thousands, possibly hundreds of thousands, of jobs.
• Can improve the quality of our supply of houses in the market by building better houses.

Proposal 2 - Nationalised Definitions of 'Tiny Homes', and Easing Of Laws Regarding Them

The reality is, there is such a shortfall of housing in Australia, that it may take a decade or longer to address the problem, even if we started implementing the right policies to do so today.
What people need is alternatives. Today.
Such as 'Tiny Homes'.
Tiny homes can be constructed in larger quantities, prefab, for cheaper than a house, and constructed on a trailer frame which allows them to be easily moved and transported.
They can be significantly cheaper than a house, and moved easily, opening up prospects for someone to own reasonable housing in Australia for a fraction of the cost of buying an established constructed house, by buying very cheap land, a cheap 'Tiny Home' and parking it permanently on their land. Then eventually moving it on, selling it even, once it comes time to upgrade to a permanent fixture house, or move into a larger fixed house.
Because they're legally defined as caravans, they subject to all the same rules.
The first problem is, those rules vary depending on where you live. Not just for each state, but even depending which council you live in. Some councils have no clear regulations at all, making matters worse. A nationalised definition of a 'Tiny Home', and national laws regarding them, would make life easier for everyone.
The second problem is, because currently Tiny Homes are defined legally as Caravans, they are subject to the same restrictions, which can be stifling, such as, subject to location (state or council laws vary). Here are some of the worst restrictions found around the country:

• Can not be placed on a vacant block of land without an existing dwelling
• No more than 1 is allowed on residential land
• Contains no more than 2 bedrooms
• Requires development approval every time they're moved
• May result in additional charges for council rates

A nationalised legal framework for tiny homes, and easing of laws around them, to make them easier and cheaper to obtain, install and live in, would open up possibilities for alternative means of housing to ease the burden on the existing housing market.

Proposal 3 - Housing Super Fund

Super is a well established method for ensuring individuals can afford their retirement without resorting to giving people free money or price fixing the cost of retirement. It forces employers to make contributions to employee's super funds, that then collect invest, grow, and eventually can be accessed at retirement age.
This is a mechanism we can borrow to achieve a similar result for renters, to allow them eventually afford housing.
I call it a 'Housing Super Fund'.
How it could work is like this:
Every tenant is Australia, could have a 'housing super fund' set up for them when they start renting. Every time a tenant pays rent, the land lord receiving the rental payment, could be required to deposit 5% of that payment into the tenant's housing super fund.
Land lords will insist, argue, that they will put up rents by 5% to compensate. But this is a lie. Prices are determined by customer purchase power. Renters will not have any additional purchase power as a result of this change. Rents won't go up in real terms over a long period of time, instead this change eats a cut away of rents from landlords and invests it on the behalf of tenants.
The housing super fund could be made accessible if and when a tenant is making their "first home purchase". If that never occurs, the funds could available automatically at retirement age instead.

Proposal 4 - Increased Property Taxes for Landlords & Elimination of Negative Gearing

While some people are facing the prospect that they may NEVER be able to afford a house in their lifetime - other individuals, might have as many as 7 properties, and are currently shopping for their 8th.
It's obvious, that the system strongly favours those who already own houses and have capital, ahead of those who don't.
So, simple solution, is to increase taxes for being a landlord.
Property taxes faced by individuals could be higher for those who own more than one house, and increase with each additional house owned.
And, Negative Gearing, eliminated, since it creates such a massive financial incentive to own more than one house.

Proposal 6 - Harsh taxes on empty resident housing

A simple proposal.
There are empty houses across Australia.
Tax the owners until they either rent them out or sell them or move into them.

Proposal 7 - Housing HELP Loan

Saved the best for last. Got a HELP Loan? Then you know how this loan structure works.
You borrow money from the government to pay for education, and then pay off that help loan in your taxes, if and when your income is above a minimum threshold. In the mean time, the loan amount is adjusted based on interest rates at the end of each financial year.
There's no reason why we can't have a similar loan structure made available for housing.
'Housing HELP Loan' could be made available to cover up to 75% of the purchase price of an individual's first home, with the remaining 25% required as an upfront deposit. The loan then can be paid off as part of the individual's taxes if and when their income is above a minimum threshold.
This would enable millions who currently can't get a home loan to finally get one, and ensure the debt of a home loan isn't financially crushing when individuals end up in a situation where they are temporarily unable to pay off their loan due to loss of employment.
That's 7 proposals to fixing housing affordability in Australia.
Which ones do you think would work?
Which ones do you think would stand a chance politically of being supported by a major party and made into reality?

My sister and I go to the same college and we live together in the same apartment. Last week she was studying for finals, and I knew that (since as was I). So I tried not to disturb her and tried to not make too much noise.
One day around 2PM or so, I was relaxing and listening to some music on my bluetooth speaker. I thought I had it at a reasonable level, but not long after my sister came into my room and said to turn it down, and then left right after.
We share a common wall between our rooms so I try to be courteous and I know things carry through super easy, so I turned it down like she asked. Apparently she didn't think I turned it down at all (even though I turned it down at least like 3 levels) so she came back into my room, and then she slapped me across the face and said "I told you to turn that sh*t down", then said how she's studying for finals "way harder than anything I could ever imagine" (she's getting a medical degree, so fair enough I guess).
She slapped me really hard. It actually hurt really badly. And she didn't believe me when I said I turned it down, and grabbed the speaker, turned it off, and left with it (she still hasn't given it back).
Should I have known better than to play music when I knew she could've been studying without asking her if it was okay first? It's her apartment (she lets me live here rent free while I get used to college) and so it's fair that it should be her rules, but I feel like she kinda went a little far slapping me and insulting me like she did.

By my count, there are 15 T5 ships available for just dilithium or a level 40 token, which someone might want a starter build for to help them finish off the episode missions and start the reputation grind. My Strict Budget Build covers the three science vessels, the Baby Step series covers the three cruisers with tactical ensigns, Quick Looks 1 and 2 cover the Hegh'ta Bird of Prey and the Jem'hadar Escort, and there's definitely an argument to be made that some are just bad choices. But there was one more I wanted to take a look at here. This series will not be as thoroughly researched as those previous series, and it will not feature optimized skill builds (there are many resources for that), but the builds will be proven in the Badlands Battlezone and in solo Defense of Starbase One Advanced, as well as extensively parsed in the Wanted (Argala System) patrol with comparisons to similar builds. That should adequately demonstrate that they can get you whatever reputation marks you need, using only mission, basic (generally Mk XII uncommon) Exchange, and Phoenix Store items. Each build will be allowed one Mk XV item to maintain parity with the Strict Budget Build, usually a forward weapon. It's also easy enough to put these together that I could be persuaded to do more if there's a ship that deserves it.
So, why the Vo'Quv? Well it's in the name, it's a carrier. Hangar bays are expensive to boost in this game, but that means they have to be balanced to have pretty good base damage. In this case the two hangars did more than half the damage of most of the other builds in this series with hardly any support for them. The downside to carriers is that they often sacrifice a lot for those hangars. Not so for Flight Deck Carriers, which are pretty much full cruisers, or any of the single hangar types, but the science carriers like the Vo'Quv don't really have an obvious path to getting ship damage, especially on this budget. Their turn rate is terrible, which is a problem for most things, they have only 6 weapons so getting a lot from energy weapons is out, and they don't have a secondary deflector, which did do more on my science vessel build than the hangars did here.
So where did I end up, then? Well, with 6 science ability slots and not a ton of options I couldn't see not using them for some direct exotic damage. And since that required me to face forward, and the turn rate was terrible and I couldn't do much about it, I concluded that I'd have to use turrets in the rear with either beam arrays or single cannons forward, the two widest arc weapon combinations possible apart from pure turrets, although their damage potential is limited. The Chronometric set also seemed like a must have, providing a large amount of EPG and some Polaron cat1 from the tac console, and a bit of aux power from the 2 piece, but I wasn't sure whether I'd want the Morphogenic set or not, since it would mean sacrificing a cannon. Then, I went to the TRINITY DPS Calculator from STO BETTER and started plugging in some rough options. Single cannons outperformed beam arrays even with the Chronometric 3 piece, so that settled that, and getting the crtd from the Morphogenic 3 piece and Cannon Scatter Volley was well worth losing a forward cannon for the torp. Attack Pattern Beta proved a bigger contributor than expected thanks to boosting the exotic damage as well, which is why that's at 2 and CSV is at 1, and easily outperformed including a Torpedo Spread as well. Finally I switched the power settings away from a balanced configuration toward weapons over aux and aux over weapons, and the high aux version did best. So that was the build.
How did it perform? Well it was sluggish, obviously, I expected that. But the DPS was pretty impressive and was reflected in how quickly it got kills. And the survivability was pretty good, with a lot of hull and pretty good healing I really couldn't complain, except that it was so sluggish it was hard to run out of range and heal if I needed to. On the other hand when I did withdraw the fighters kept fighting, contributing to the highest Wanted Elite DPS of any of the builds in the table with only one attempt needed to survive the whole mission (the science vessel could do better by charging in and dying a couple of times, but needed to play cautiously and sacrifice its CPB to survive). They were even powerful enough to handle the Birds of Prey in Starbase One Advanced without any help from the mothership, potentially even without player input, which could be convenient.

Captain Details

Captain Name	Stilt
Captain Career	Science
Captain Faction	Federation
Captain Race	Vulcan
Primary Specialization	Temporal	The best specialization for exotic builds, as well as for ground builds and a good generalist option, it provides debuffs, damage boosts, EPG, and survivability

Space Skill Tree

Rank	Engineering		Science		Tactical
Lieutenant		Advanced Hull Capacity			Advanced Energy Weapon Training	Advanced Projectile Weapon Training
Lt. Commander	Improved Electro-Plasma System Flow	Impulse Expertise	Improved Control Expertise	Drain Expertise	Targeting Expertise	Defensive Maneuvering
			Control Amplification	Drain Infection
Commander	Hull Plating				Advanced Weapon Amplification	Advanced Weapon Specialization
Captain	Defensive Subsystem Tuning		Advanced Exotic Particle Generator	Advanced Long Range Targeting Sensors	Advanced Hull Penetration	Advanced Shield Weakening
Admiral					Coordination Protocols	Advanced Tactical Readiness
					Defensive Coordination
					Offensive Coordination
1 Points Left	8		11		26

Space Skill Unlocks

Purchases	Engineering	Science	Tactical
2	Hazard Emitters III	Science Team III	Tachyon Beam III
5	Battery Expertise	Sector Space Travel Speed
7	Feedback Pulse III	Photonic Shockwave III	Jam Sensors III
10		Maximum Shield Capacity
12			Tractor Beam III
15		Control Resistance
17			Viral Matrix III
20		Shield Drain Resistance
24 (Ultimate)			Focused Frenzy
25 (1st Ultimate Enhancer)			Frenzied Assault
26 (2nd Ultimate Enhancer)			Team Frenzy

This skill tree is my generalist one from Strict Budget Build part 2, and it pretty much needs to be. This build relies on both energy weapon and exotic damage, so it can't afford to neglect either one. There are other generalist skill trees, of course, but that is what you'll need to be looking for, any single purpose tree isn't going to get the job done.

Ship Loadout: Vo'Quv Carrier

Slot	Item	Notes
Fore Weapon 1	Polaron Cannon	The one Mk XV, single cannons are usually a poor choice, but they will outperform beam arrays forward/turrets aft and provide 180 degrees of firing arc
Fore Weapon 2	Polaron Cannon	The Vo'Quv suffers from terrible turn rate so it doesn't want weapons with narrow arcs, but it needs to face forward for the exotic damage
Fore Weapon 3	Morphogenic Polaron Energy Torpedo Launcher	Here for the 3 piece set bonus providing 30% crtd to the whole ship
Aft Weapon 1	Heavy Chronometric Polaron Turret	Mostly need a turret, 2 piece provides some aux
Aft Weapon 2	Morphogenic Polaron Energy Weapon	Another turret, and contributes to the 3 piece
Aft Weapon 3	Polaron Turret	Just a turret
Deflector	Solanae Deflector Array Mk XII Very Rare	Provides more EPG out of the box than any other mission reward
Impulse Engines	Sol Defense Impulse Engines Mk XII Very Rare	With the bonus from getting hit this does just provide the best total turn rate out of the mission rewards at 14.7 degrees/s, replace with Fortified Competitive rep engines
Warp Core	Obelisk Subspace Rift Warp Core	This build only hits 122 aux so this doesn't actually help, could consider Deuterium-Stabilized but the benefit is minimal
Shields	Sol Defense Covariant Shield Array Mk XII Very Rare	2 piece is nice for survivability, alternative would be Jem'Hadar 2 piece for a bit of Polaron cat1.
Devices	Exotic Particle Flood	Crafted in Science R&D. I do have to admit that the materials are a little hard to come by, and Admiralty (with account unlocked ships) is the best source I've found.
	Deuterium Surplus	Evasive Maneuvers in battery form, and you can collect 4 per day from the Alhena system.
	Delta Alliance Reinforcements Beacon	Handy damage boost
3 Engineering Consoles	Console - Engineering - Trellium-D Plating Mk XII Very Rare	Good survivability console, could use a Neutronium instead
	Console - Engineering - Polaric Modulator Mk XII Very Rare	Boosts Inertia, which is rare, as well as turn rate, and slipstream turn rate at warp
	Console - Engineering - House Martok Defensive Configuration Mk XII Very Rare	Boosts turn rate and provides some survivability, an RCS would work too
4 Science Consoles	Console - Science - Temporal Disentanglement Suite Mk XII Very Rare	Nice crit and durability boost, plus some power.
	Console - Science - Temporally Shielded Datacore Mk XII Very Rare	Slightly less EPG than Particle Generators but it makes up for it with the CtrlX
	Console - Science - Particle Generator Mk XII Uncommon	Just need EPG
	Console - Science - Particle Generator Mk XII Common
2 Tactical Consoles	Console - Tactical - Morphogenic Matrix Controller Mk XII Very Rare	For the 3 piece and some polaron cat1
	Console - Tactical - Chronometric Capacitor Mk XII Very Rare	Good EPG, some aux from the 2 piece, and some Polaron cat1, and this build uses all of it
2 Hangar Bays	Hangar - To'Duj Fighters	These provide more DPS than any other hangar that's available by default, and they come with the ship, they will die in heavy AoE content, otherwise use two
	Hangar - Delta Flyers	These have slightly less DPS than To'duj but almost never die in any content, but do require a level 65 KDF character for Cross Faction Flying. Could substitute B'rels for more DPS loss

Officer Details

Bridge Officers
Lt. Commander Tactical	Tactical Team I	Shield distribution and debuff clear, may cause firing cycle problems but I haven't seen it
	Cannon: Scatter Volley I	Excellent weapon damage buff and also spreads APB to up to 3 targets
	Attack Pattern Beta II	Unusual to slot this above the firing mode, but it boosts every damage source and weapon damage is only ~1/4 of the total
Lt. Commander Engineering	Emergency Power to Engines I	More than doubles speed and provides +2 turn rate, essential mobility for any build
	Auxiliary to Structural I	Excellent heal and damage resist, and on a very short cooldown
	Emergency Power to Weapons III	Major energy weapon damage boost
Commander Science	Hazard Emitters I	Good hull heal and debuff clear
	Destabilizing Resonance Beam I	Good exotic damage, used with GW
	Photonic Officer II	Cooldown reduction
	Gravity Well III	Good exotic damage and control
Lieutenant Science	Science Team I	Shield heal and debuff clear
	Tyken's Rift I	Exotic damage, alternate with GW

Traits & Duty Officers

Trait	Name	Description	Notes
Personal Traits	Astrophysicist		A little bit of EPG
	Cannon Training		A little more cannon damage
	Conservation of Energy		Significant exotic damage while solo, but stacks don't last long
	Deft Cannoneer		Boosts turn rate by 1, on this build we need it, from Cannons R&D
	Fleet Coordinator		One of the best traits in the game when on a team
	Give Your All		Excellent hull damage resistance, from Engineering R&D
	Operative		Some extra crit
	Particle Manipulator		The most powerful trait for exotic damage, +50%/+29.6% crth/crtd on this build, from Science R&D
	Photonic Capacitor		Extra Photonic Fleet is nice to have
Starship Traits	None		Unconventional Tactics from completing Strategist is definitely worth slotting here, but I kept it cheap.
Space Reputation Traits	None		You'll start picking these up very quickly, Precision and Advanced Targeting Systems are top picks.
Duty Officers	Projectile Weapons Officer		"Law" from A Fistful of Gorn, a bit of a pain to get there, but worth having
	Projectile Weapons Officer		A common included in my first duty officer pack
	Astrometrics Scientist		Uncommon, also in my first pack, handy to have set
	Conn Officer		From Phoenix, a must have for mobility in any build

This table shows all damage sources in one Wanted Advanced run, with multiple lines from the same source summed together.

Source	DPS
To'Duj Fighters	6594
Delta Flyers	4504
Gravity Well	3571
Photonic Fleet	3170
Polaron Cannons	2889
Destabilizing Resonance Beam	1728
Chronometric Turret	1156
Polaron Turret	1001
Morphogenic Turret	994
Morphogenic Torpedo	855
Tyken's Rift	839
Drain Infection	708
Entropic Rider	144

^{Table formatting brought to you by ExcelToReddit}
Now, let's talk keybinds. In STO on PC you're going to want to learn keybinding eventually, and most of it's not too hard and can be done through the chat window (although it is arguably better to create a separate text file with your binds, that's more complicated). The first thing I always do is to set up a secondary fire weapons button through settings, usually V, just in case I screw up and my intended fire keybind doesn't work. While I'm there I usually set Distribute Shields to Left Shift, it's a pretty good survivability boost, although a lot of people do say it can mess up firing cycles, but personally I've never noticed a problem. Then, the commands you'll want to know are "FirePhasers" or "FireAll", "+power_exec Distribute_Shields", and "+TrayExecByTray # #", where # is a number. Note that the list of commands needs quotation marks around it, and commands should be separated by "$$". So if you typed the following into the chat: /bind y "+TrayExecByTray 0 0 $$ +TrayExecByTray 0 1 $$ +TrayExecByTray 1 2 $$ +TrayExecByTray 1 3" That would create a keybind so that y would activate the first and second abilities in the row labeled 1, and the third and fourth abilities in the row labeled 2 (0 in a keybind means 1 in the UI, 1 means 2, 2 means 3, etc., that's just how it works), starting with the fourth ability in 2 and then proceeding backwards. From there on in it's personal preference, put things where they feel natural to you, where you're used to them being. What I use has evolved naturally over time, I make no claims that it's efficient, just that I'm used to it, and I use it on everything. For fire weapons, distribute shields, Emergency Power abilities, cooldown reduction, often Aux to Structural, and anything else I just want to keep active I use spacebar, like this: /bind space "FireAll $$ +power_exec Distribute_Shields $$ +TrayExecByTray 6 0 $$ +TrayExecByTray 6 1 $$ +TrayExecByTray 6 2 $$ +TrayExecByTray 6 3 $$ +TrayExecByTray 6 4" That's the first 5 slots in row 7, which is usually enough. Then for my firing modes, Attack Pattern Beta, and so on, things with short cooldowns I activate as I attack, I use the 7 key, no good reason for that it just happened, and the first 4 slots in row 3: /bind 7 "+TrayExecByTray 2 0 $$ +TrayExecByTray 2 1 $$ +TrayExecByTray 2 2 $$ +TrayExecByTray 2 3" And finally for my exotic builds I always put Gravity Well and Destabilizing Resonance beam on 2, using the next two slots in row 3, although it is true that the usual logic behind that doesn't apply here, I just did it out of habit: /bind 2 "+TrayExecByTray 2 4 $$ +TrayExecByTray 2 5" That's all the keybinds I use, everything else I activate manually, one at a time, but it does compress 13 keys I might want to be pressing down to 3, which helps a lot.
Now, the difficult thing about this build is that I really don't know how to suggest upgrading it, apart from the obvious necessity of some Competitive Reputation engines to get their Overcharge to improve turn rate, I made sure to use Aux to Structural to pair with the Fortified version of those. The damage is very divided between different types, with about 40% from hangars, 25% from exotics, and 21% from energy weapons, and it's not getting a lot out of any of them, but I'll provide my own ideas and the STO BETTER Basics links for all three. Currently the biggest damage source is the hangars, but trying to improve those would be expensive. Ideally you'd like to pick up Superior Area Denial from the Mirror Strike Wing Escort lockbox ship, or at least the Independent Wingmate space trait, but those are very expensive compared to this build. Even the more minor and less powerful Advanced Engineering – Hangar Craft Power Transmission consoles are starting at 1 million energy credits each on PC for either a Mk XII with a useless mod or a Mk II with an [EPG] mod, or 5 million for a Mk II with [Polaron], while Swarmer Matrix is going for 7 million. If you wanted to work on exotic damage you could of course pick up the Temporal reputation two piece, and then you might want Subspace Vortex or Very Cold in Space to replace the heals with some more damage, but those will cost you 9 million each, and really you'd want to pair them with Spore Infused Anomalies from the Somerville or Batlh C-store ships for a truly potent source of exotic damage. You might be able to get good exotic damage out of the Gravimetric Photon and Particle Emission Plasma torpedoes after picking up the Competitive engines, and those aren't as expensive, but they do give you a much narrower arc. And if you wanted to improve the energy weapons, of course there are reputation items you can pick up starting with the Discovery reputation shield, but you're pretty limited by the combination of poor turn rate and forward firing exotics. You could try to switch to dual (heavy) cannons, probably moving the torpedo to the rear and dropping the plain turret, but I don't think I'm a good enough pilot to pull that off even with Competitive engines, which would leave you with single cannons which have underwhelming base damage and very few set items to support them. I just don't know what direction to go in to make a really impactful improvement in this build.
Finally, here's the table of DPS testing in the Wanted patrol for all five equivalent budget builds. The Luna used the original, unaltered Strict Budget Build, using the mentioned swap of Emergency Power to Shields instead of Aux to Structural for better survivability against non-Borg. The Vor'cha sat somewhere between parts one and two of the Baby Step series, meaning it had exactly the same consoles as the Hegh'ta BoP and similar ones to the Jem Escort, and the beam equivalents of the phaser weapons, with exactly the abilities and personal traits in the Baby Step posts. It must also be said that the Vor'cha and Vo'quv were the only builds to never die on elite difficulty, and the Vor'cha was definitely the toughest, although all the builds took about 20 minutes to get through the mission so using them at that difficulty is a bad idea. The Hegh'ta of course used the Quick Looks 1 build, and the Jem Escort used the Quick Looks 2 build.

	Elite (DPS thousands)	Advanced 1 (DPS thousands)	Advanced 2	Advanced 3	Advanced 4	Advanced Average
Hegh'ta Heavy BoP	20.0	20.1	21.5	22.5	23.2	21.8
Jem'hadar Escort	19.3	23.4	20.6	21.8	19.7	21.4
Vo'quV Carrier	27.3	26.3	28.2	26.6	25.2	26.6
Luna Science Vessel	24.8	31.4	28.3	27.9	27.0	28.6
Vor'cha Battlecruiser	15.1	15.0	14.1	14.8	14.6	14.6

^{Table formatting brought to you by ExcelToReddit}

Hello everybody!
Picture this situation: You have a backend database for a custom CRM software. It's in MS SQL Server. It's a huge mess, documentation basically non-existant, naming convention doesn't basically exist. developing and testing in prod (despite having a DEV and TEST instances....). There's 1500 tables, like 500 of those are empty for example. There's a fuck ton of left behind tables from development, backup tables, WIP stuff, tables that are no longer used, etc. A lot of the business logic is in stored procedures.
My job now is working on a DWH that is taking data from this system for reporting and data science and stuff, right? We know that we're not getting all the data we need from the database but nobody can even tell us what the tables have actual useful data in them. It's a nightmare.
so my job is to basically reverse engineer the backend database and find out what tables contain business relevant data. How would you approach this? I'm looking at how big the tables are, when they were last edited, running this query periodically every couple of days. But I'm not sure that's the best approach.
And no, I can't just burn it all down lol.

My parents are horrible for each other, too stubborn and antagonistic to ever live peacefully together. My entire childhood was spent keeping them off each other's throats and making sure one didn't kill the other. My mom is confrontational and has this tendency of fixating on a topic for days. Like literally will pick a topic and continue berating or belittling for days on end. She has faced a lot from extreme financial stress to near torture from her parents-in-law. It's not an excuse but just a fact
My dad is stubborn and doesn't think before he speaks, and takes things lightly, never thinking about the other person. He has ever been financially stable but asked my mom to leave her high-paying job to look after me and my sister when we were younger.
Both are manipulative to a fault and will make sure that everyone around them is either obeying every word they have spoken or both will resort to violence. Both me and my sister have been beaten black and blue on multiple occasions.
I have spent 18 years keeping the two of them together, making sure that fights don't escalate too much, making sure that if nothing, they stayed together for my sister, who was too young to handle their separation. A couple days ago, the two of them pushed each other too far and my dad finally broke, telling her that once the debts were gone, he would leave too. He plans to get me out of the house too, leaving my mom and sister together. I don't plan on leaving my sister alone with either of them but I'm still only a second year in university in Engineering and dual enrolled for 2 different degree programs. Even if I take out a loan to support my studies, I cannot support her studies too at this juncture. I have finals in a couple days and them splitting up is all I can think about. I know that their relationship is toxic and they deserve to be free of it but they are my parents and I'm worried about what happens next to my sister and I as we are largely dependent on them. My sister doesn't know anything and I'm terrified. Please advice, especially how not to fall apart.

I’m using the Fender Rumble stage 800, so far it’s been a fun amp, but I can’t say I feel it’s reliable. I’m having issues. You can make your own custom presets with cabinets, heads, effect pedals and stuff. And there’s the fender tone app where you create those presets, and sync it to the amp.
The first problem I encountered was that when I created my first custom preset, it affected the volume of all 200 pre installed presets. Most became inaudible, some flat out had no sound anymore. Didn’t matter how much I messed with the sound settings. They just broke, seems to be a software issue, a big maybe.
To solve this, I reset the amp (note, NOT the app) to factory. This immediately fixed the issue with all 200 presets. They sound great now .
As I expected, the custom presets I’d made didn’t show up on the amp LCD screen anymore. But that shouldn’t be a problem since the fender app has my presets and I can just re-sync it to the amp. Right???
Nope!!! Wrong, apparently. Resetting the amp also resets your app. Makes no sense and now I’m incredibly disappointed.
Maybe this is just a “new tech” problem that I’ve seen other people complain about. Companies trying to make their amps more like smart phones, but without the reliability. Because seriously, why have an app at all if resetting the amp is going to affect your account on an app???? When you factory reset your iphone, it doesn’t delete things on your iCloud. That makes sense. This doesn’t and it’s ass backwards.
I’m so incredibly pissed off that I just lost all my custom presets. They were cool and I spent hours making them, I loved using them. Idk if I can even get them back.
If anyone else has encountered this and found a solution, lmk. Otherwise thanks for reading my rant. I’m going to go try and recreate all my custom presets now.

(this is a long post but the details matter bc im not sure if im being manipulated or not. So I was talking to this guy for like 3 weeks. we’ve hooked up a few months before that, we talked in between the few months and the beginning of that 3 weeks but didn’t hook up again until the beginning of the 3 weeks. anyways, beginning of this 3 weeks, i hit him up just bc i was bored and wanted someone to talk to and then we ended up talking all day and we hooked up again. we were being like super cute, all cuddlely (im not normally like this with people. like im super closed off) and like we hit it off right and we talk all day for the next few days and he says he kinda likes me and was like “is that ok?” and so im like dang this seems genuine then we hook up again and it went great. we hugged and kissed before he left and everything. then suddenly he ghosts me. i literally blew up his phone. just asking like why did he ghost me, like acting pathetic. im aware of this, this whole time. like the night before we held hands, sung lil peep and like it was a vibe and like….. me? i don’t vibe with everyone or open up so i was like super excited ab this little connection. but i couldn’t stop texting him and like i literally just sound insane atp ok well he ghosts me for a day and then messages me and is like sorry. it was just a lot and basically saying it scared him how much he liked me. and i’m like ok cool we can keep it casual and yk still hook up and he’s like ok cool. so we’re seeing each other pretty often for like a week and a half or so and like we’re still kinda acting all cute and stuff and we talk about how we’re not going to have sex with other people and im a one man kind of gal and im like yeah totally fine w me. anyways, a little over a week ago he cancels our plans and and i kind of get triggered and im like well if you don’t like me just say that and was like yk you don’t have to beat around the bush. he was also just acting weird all day that day just slow replies and stuff. and so then im kind of going off on him because he’s not giving me a yes or no. and then he cuts me off and said i was acting crazy. so then he unfriended me on snap and i tell him that i hope the next girl gives him teethy head and he’s basically like yo girl i don’t wanna block you and like said he’s been super depressed and i sympathized and stuff and then we hooked up again and agreed there would be no strings attached. and then a few days later i ask if we could go back to being cute and he said yeah i said cool and that’s the last i heard from him. and like i kept blowing up his phone. i’ve sent him so many texts in the past 3 days. no matter how hard i try to not text him i end up doing it and i just don’t understand what’s wrong with me. why do i obsess

Hi Reddit, so I’ll try to keep this as concise as possible while still giving you all the facts. Let us start from the beginning, my at the time 21 y.o. step-brother, was going through his first big break up. Instead of confiding in others or taking time to understand his emotions he instead picked up a book about the stages of love. Let me also explain that my brother has never been the smartest guy and mainly gets by on his good looks and charm in his life. Anyway this book gave the usual “love requires fighting to work it shows that you care about the other” you know stuff everyone already knows. I’m guessing because it came from a book ,or because it was plainly saying what he was too naive to understand about what he was feeling, he became infatuated with every line. Anytime I would have relationship problems he would quote the self help books he had read since and recommend me ones to read. This went on for while but eventually I finished nursing school and moved out of my family’s house (which is my mother’s house, this is important for later) to start working.
Now fast forward to four years later. I’m living on my own with my the love of my life, working the night shift in the hospital like I’ve always wanted. On my way home on night I called my mom to catch up on my drive home. We started talking and eventually I asked about my step-brother. She explained that he was still living at home and had no plans on getting a job or moving out (for context my brother graduated with a master’s degree a year ago). I found that odd and asked what he is doing now. My mom explained that he just makes music and does podcasts with his friends. He apparently says he wants to be an entrepreneur. Which is fine everyone wants to make it big doing what they love doing however. My mother also explained that he constantly invites people she doesn’t know to her house to hangout and when she gets off of work she comes home to strangers that expect her to cook for them. My mother then started tearing up saying “I don’t feel like it’s my house anymore”. That’s when I got upset. I asked her why doesn’t she kick him out or at least start asking for rent so he has to get a job. She explained that she wanted to do that but my step father wouldn’t allow it. My mother and step father have a wonderful marriage and never fight, but because my stepbrother is his son he has attachment to him. My mom recently had to kick her daughter (my blood related sister) into the camper as well since my step sister (19 y.o.) lets her boyfriend stay on weekends in what used to be the girls room. My mother keeps explaining that all of these situations are putting stress on their marriage and by kicking out her daughter she feels like she betrayed her just so my stepfather’s kids can get their way in her house.
After this phone call I was livid so I called my step brother to confront him. After asking the normal “hi how are you” I asked if he has started looking for a job and he said “why would I?”. I responded “so you can work and move out”. Then he said “im in my 20s this is the time you are supposed to chase your dreams” he then pointed out that I always wanted to be a YouTuber or streamer and I should go for it. I then said you know I have a job now and I have to give that job a lot of my time in order to afford the life I live. He basically laughed and explained that there is always enough time. Not much important was said after that.
Now fast forward a few weeks later I see posts from his Instagram talking about how “social media is poison, take back your life, put down your phone, etc.” (Crazy to post that on social media btw). I have also come across his podcast which are just him and his friend who both have the combined IQ of a beheaded chicken explain that the universe is big and has like billions of stars and stuff. 0.0 his entire personality now is saying basic facts at the surface level and then acting like it’s deep as fuck. Furthermore the constant insistence on following your passion mixed with the complete ineptitude of being able to comprehend how smug and pretentious he is during any interaction has breed some real distain from anyone who can see through his act.
All of these posts about self help combined with the complete ignorance of how his actions putting a negative effect on our family has really put a barrier between us. I really don’t think I can take it anymore and I want to either try to explain that he has become a pretentious douche who only keeps around yes men who all think a fact for 5th graders they learn at the zoo makes them better than everyone else, but I honestly think he will just say I don’t understand or maybe I should read this book about stress. I’ve went over the situation with friends of mine and they all laugh when they see his posts and hear him talk now. For God sake he held his 25th birthday party recently and said for everyone to bring a book to exchange knowledge to one another and wear business casual.
I just want my mom to feel like the home she worked tirelessly as a single mother all those years to afford for our family is hers. I have always been so close to my brother and I want him back as a friend. I want my sister to be able to live in the house she was raised in instead of in a camper.
Well that’s everything as of now left out a lot of stories about him being directly wrong about facts he tells us or times he got called out and embarrassed about shit but I think I’ll just leave it here. I plan on confronting him soon I just don’t know what to say. Thank you for your time.

It's gonna get bumpier, guys! Just my theory/feelings, so feel free to disagree. In my decades of EMS/fire service, 13 yrs of ER and ICU duty in a "substance triangle hub", I've seen my fair share of users. Lisa is sadly not going to be here much longer. It is what SHE wants. She didn't change when each kid was handed away. She didn't change when her man left her for another woman (one who didn't lay in bed all day, gorked out of their gourd). Lisa has zero self-awareness, pride, or empathy for others. It isn't all the substance either. Face it, she's an unlikeable, entitled, lazy human who has chosen rock over her kids, family, and life. Unfortunately, Lisa is showing signs of brain damage. That phone recording a few days ago that someone posted? That was more than just being wasted. More like a TIA. When she nodded early this morning, did you notice the hand tremors? How her eyeballa in the 3rd nod went in different directions? She's exhibiting neuro symptoms and that is a bad sign. When they become obvious, you are dying. Literally beginning to run to that bright light. Problem is, Lisa wants that. She doesn't want to get clean. She doesn't want Jace back. She wants her substances and that is it. She's going to get more and more unhinged in her behaviour now. Once drug-induced brain damage begins, it progresses quickly unless the person stops using. The ONLY hope at this point is if she misbehaves on the street, at the store, in the car, amd the cops are called. Seems in her area, folks tend to just ignore "the whack-a-doodles" since the cops are understaffed. What's sad is that the internet is forever. All those tt streams, YT clips, those are what Lisa's kids will have to remember their Mum by. They'll see how she never cared about them, but about having strangers send her money to get FUBAR'd. She could have been their hero after Cole died. Too bad she was too weak.

I think I have Tourette’s now and tics from all of the stress this relationship has put me under. I am a woman and I am 24.and I’ve dealt with it for about 3 years. I have no friends or family my parents don’t want me at their house. I don’t even like the town I’m living in I have nothing. What do I do? I’m really struggling with my Christianity faith and I turned into something completely different. I think I also have short term memory loss now. I feel really sad because my anxiety and depression has complicated my whole life recently that I can’t even get a solid job from all of the trauma like I don’t even want to go to the women’s shelter here in this town because he raped me and it did happen constantly. I don’t know what to do because I don’t want to go to court and see him. Like I have no idea where to start to better my life. I feel like I’m really late diagnosed autistic as well. Like I did really well in school but social things have always steered me the wrong way. I feel so broken and alone and will cling to any love even if it’s terrible… I don’t want that route anymore what do I do. I’m scared and feel helpless. I was his caregiver because I truly loved him and wanted to help him but I didn’t have a car and with him being special he got free services so I always did at home stuff but lately I’ve gotten so depressed I completely shut off and he bullied me to the point of wanting to almost committing suicide and taking his pills. I keep hearing god saying it was unequally yoked and I have to go. Im in the valley and need prayers of wisdom and healing.

I’m 15 right now, and something that eats my heart away is that iam still a virgin. Not just a normal virgin. A incel turbo virgin. For a while now I’ve been wanting to lose my virginity so bad. I want to have sex so bad. Everyday at school I get so hard the whole class thinking about having sex and it eats my brain away because I cannot have sex and I will not be having it anytime soon. Because iam a shy incel that does not know how to talk to girls. Iam so horny I’m on different level. A while back I tried hiring a prostitute off instagram dms. I was so shaky while I was texting this girl. We were so close to meeting up and she sent me nudes and videos and photos and stuff. I told her I was underage and she said she was fine with it. I had to let her know. She was gonna drive around my area and we were gonna get a hotel to have sex in. I was gonna pay 100$ for 2 hours of sex. I was GENUINELY shaking so hard while getting ready to send the money. But before I sent it, I decided to reverse google image search one of the photos she sent me. Turns out it was a fucking scam. I was disappointed. Not because I almost got scammed. But because I didn’t get laid. If I was older and had a car I’d prolly have a better chance of finding a prostitute on the street. But unfortunately, I’m gonna have to wait a year or 2. The most wildest thing I’ve done was actually a few days ago. A few days ago I wanted to masterbate with a condom on, to make me feel as I was the one having sex. During lunch I snuck out of my school and went over to cvs and bought some latex lube condoms. I was gonna wait around midnight to masterbate with them on but I should’ve known my horniness got the best of me. I jerked off with the condom 1 hour after getting back from school. It actually felt like I was the one about to have sex. And it was my first time trying a condom. I still have 2 more. Iam very sad because I turn 16 in 14 days. (The 29th). And iam still no where near gonna lose my virginity, or have a girlfriend and it makes me sad and unmotivated. Me horniess is the reason I can’t do shit. Im just to horny thinking about having sex and I don’t know what to do or how to control it. And it’s only gonna get worse over time. I look at all the girls with good body’s full of lust and I can’t control it. I think I need help. What do I do?