Hello everyone,
I have been looking at this sub for a while but this is my first post. Any advice and comment in general is appreciated!
My ex and I are meeting on Thursday before we both part ways as we are graduating from college. I reached out to her and asked to meet just to catch up and see what has changed in her life since we broke up a month and a half ago. I am leaving college and moving back home, back to NY on Saturday, and she is moving back to her parent’s place in NH. As a result, I wanted to meet one last time because this might be the last time we ever see each other.
For context:
My ex girlfriend broke up with me on April 8th. It was kind of unexpected and caught me off guard. Anyways, she said she wanted to break up for two main reasons. The first being distance and the second being that I was putting so much effort into the relationship and she felt the was unfair to me because she didn’t feel the same way. After 2-1/2 year being in a serious romantic relationship, and 4 years of friendship, this is how it ended.
Why I’m posting:
I am posting because I want everyone’s opinion on this letter I wrote for my ex. While I was blindsided by this, she has been nothing but respectful and classy about post break up stuff. Respected the NC and respected me saying I will reach out if I’m ready. So we planned and are meeting on Thursday. I could see myself getting back with her down the road, as my letter dictates. I wrote this hand written letter and want opinion. Thanks in advance!
The letter:
Dear [her name],
As we prepare to part ways and move on to the next chapters of our lives, I wanted to take a moment to express some things that have been weighing on my heart. First and foremost, I want you to know that I harbor no ill will towards you for the decision you made to end our relationship. While it was incredibly difficult for me to accept at first, I understand that you felt it was the best choice for you, and I respect that.
Our time together has meant the world to me, and I want you to know that I cherish every moment we shared. You brought so much love, joy, and growth into my life, and for that, I will always be grateful. Even though things didn't work out the way I had hoped, I am thankful for the experiences we had together and the person you helped me become.
I want you to know that despite the pain of our breakup, my love for you hasn't changed. It may take time to heal and find closure, but I want you to know that I care about you deeply, and I am open to the possibility of revisiting our relationship in the future if it's what we both desire. With that being said, I will not wait on that opportunity to come around and I don’t expect you too either.
That being said, I cannot deny the hurt and sadness I felt when you made the decision to end things. It was a difficult pill to swallow, and it left me feeling lost and heartbroken. While I may not fully understand all your reasons, I respect your honesty and your right to follow your own path. As I said at the very start of our relationship, you never have to justify your feeling to me.
As we say our goodbyes, please know that you will always hold a special place in my heart. I wish you nothing but happiness, success, and fulfillment in all of your endeavors. And if our paths should cross again someday, I hope that we can look back on our time together with fondness and gratitude. My number is always open, so please keep in touch. I look forward to the next time we speak to each other.
Take care of yourself, [her name]. Know that you are loved and valued, now and always.
With love and respect,
Mike

Growing up, I always felt a little out of place in my family. My two siblings, Alex and Sarah, were the golden children—excelling in everything from academics to sports. Meanwhile, I stumbled along, barely scraping by in school and fumbling at every turn. My parents made it painfully obvious who their favorites were, lavishing praise and attention on Alex and Sarah while I received indifferent glances and half-hearted encouragement.
Things came to a head when my grandfather passed away. He was the only family member who seemed to understand me, often taking me under his wing and teaching me about various things, from carpentry to history. His stories were the highlights of my childhood. When he died, it felt like I lost my one true ally.
The will reading was a small, somber affair in my grandfather's lawyer's office. I sat in the corner, trying to make myself as invisible as possible. As the lawyer read through the document, it was pretty much as I expected: most of the estate went to my parents, and specific items and small sums of money were left to my siblings. I braced myself for the nominal mention I assumed would be my portion.
However, as the lawyer continued, he revealed a shocking twist—my grandfather had left the bulk of his personal fortune to me. This included a significant sum of money and a small house by the lake where I had spent many summers learning and growing under his tutelage.
The room fell silent. My parents and siblings turned to stare at me, their faces a mix of disbelief and indignation. I was just as stunned, unable to form words. The lawyer added that my grandfather had written a personal letter to me, to be read privately. He handed me an envelope with trembling hands.
As soon as we left the lawyer’s office, the onslaught began. My parents accused me of manipulating my grandfather, of taking advantage of his old age and fondness for me. Alex and Sarah chimed in, echoing their accusations, saying that I didn’t deserve such a fortune, that it wasn’t fair for the “failure” of the family to come out on top.
Feeling cornered and overwhelmed, I retreated to the safety of the small lake house, where I opened my grandfather’s letter. His words were kind and filled with love. He wrote of his pride in my resilience and kindness, qualities he said were far more important than any academic or athletic achievement. He explained that he had seen the imbalance in how I was treated and wanted to give me a chance to find my own path without the heavy shadow of comparison.
The inheritance became a turning point. While my relationship with my family soured from that day, my life took a new direction. I used the money wisely, investing in my education and starting a small business that played to my strengths in craftsmanship, something my grandfather would have been proud of.
Years later, I look back with a mixture of sadness and gratitude. The family I grew up with never truly accepted me, but in his own way, my grandfather gave me the family legacy I needed—one of love, recognition, and the means to build my own life. His gift was more than money; it was the opportunity to prove to myself that I wasn't the failure they saw, but a person worthy of love and success, just as he had always known.

tl;dr - The bike lanes are here to stay until at least 2026 when Council will receive a report on usage and issues (along with an interim report in 2025). The vote was 8-1 in favor of accepting that recommendation.
Hey everyone,
I've posted an update on the BikeBridge facebook group which I'd recommend joining if you're interested in cycling in Lethbridge, but I'll copy here for those not on Facebook. The council vote has just occurred and we are in the clear until the Summer of 2026 when this will be revisited! I want to thank everyone once again for coming out in person, writing letters, and of course, getting out on your bikes. If you want (way) more details - here are the notes I took, and I'll add my thoughts after:

• This was originally item 4.2.4 on the Agenda where it could be voted on without discussion - council pulled it from this section, asking for additional discussion.
• It became item 8.1.2 - Councilor Middleton-Hope opened with a question regarding the snow removal issues. Director of Infrastructure Services Sanchez said that even last winter they saw a dramatic decrease in calls for the last snowfall event as they adjusted their clearing policies, but adjustments will continue next winter and there will be 2 staff dedicated to the downtown to keep tabs on the situation
• Councilor Campbell expressed that there was a lively discussion which he would characterize as supportive, while some people expressed that they supported the idea, but had concerns around the design - he is supporting the motion because administration has heard those concerns and is continuing to act on them
• Councilor Dodic pushed back and said that a few dozen people over 2 meetings does not constitute overwhelming support, and the Lethbridge Herald poll (while also not reliable representation) had ~700 votes, with more than 75% opposing them
• He supports bike lanes like those along Scenic Drive that share space with pedestrians
• He doesn't believe there was meaningful consultation and said the cost for the 2 lanes was $2.9M, with only $1.2M covered by the federal government
• He said even with that money, besides 4th Avenue South these bike lanes don't go anywhere and so people will have to ride with traffic anyway and people will apparently only shop on 4th Ave and 7th Street because of the protected lanes
• Businesses expressed concern and social media came down on them, calling for boycotts (although some people pushed back on that, and he thanked them for doing so)
• He wants everyone to support businesses along the bike lanes so they don't suffer and is concerned for it
• He feels this vote is a done deal, but is symbolically voting against it
• The vote was called - it passed 8-1 (they didn't say, but I will assume Councilor Dodic was the vote against)

My thoughts here:

• I'm a bit confused by the bike lanes going nowhere comment - on 4th Ave these connect to the scenic drive multi-use path (which admittedly is just a sidewalk for a few blocks), and on 7th Street they connect with the bike boulevard - I certainly agree that connectivity city-wide is an issue (one that is solved with more bike paths, not fewer), but these paths connect about as well as any individual two paths could
• The comment about cyclists only shopping on 4th Ave and 7th St due to safety is strange as well - there is a big difference between a mostly safe route with a short ride (or even walking your bike a block or two) at the end, versus no protection at all
• While I've encountered a few individuals saying they wouldn't shop at a few local businesses, there's been nothing organized that I would consider a boycott - I can't read all social media all the time, but I have kept my ear to the ground on this issue, if that is happening someone please let me know
• I'll restate my position here - I don't support boycotting any businesses regardless of their position on the bike lanes, but I do think we should shop at them while being very vocal about liking the bike lanes - I think biking gets less attention because cyclists are in a good mood while motorists complain about parking, so business owners hear a lot more about parking

This was really long, my apologies. With any luck we've got a few years before we need to think about this again. So get out and enjoy downtown and enjoy biking in Lethbridge!

I used to be part of several writing groups and love short timed prompts and collaborative stories.
We can just launch straight into the world of stories. No need to talk about ourselves, although we could use the odd autobiographical prompt.
Rather than a traditional letter, I hope the stories could respond to each other in a subtle way(I find this happens naturally in writers groups)ie one story mentions the spring buds and the next mentions flowers blooming.
Who am I looking for? Any-one who loves writing and reading and has a senses of playfulness intact
I can set prompts or we can take turns. DM if your interested and we can work out a modus operandi!

I started Greys earlier this year and I’ve binged my way through a lot. George, the plane crash, the shooting, Derek’s death. It’s been such a ride! So many tears.
The one thing I’m not following is Alex’s departure. I’m on S17 now and Bailey’s mother has just died. Does Alex really not come back at all, even with Meredith being so sick?
I just can’t imagine him leaving Jo. I actually don’t like Jo, and I do like Izzie - but he was so happy with Jo. I get that they put together a little montage to remind us of how much he loved Izzie, but I just wasn’t feeling it in comparison to how he loved Jo.
To think he was stood there at Meredith’s trial, with Jo stood next to him an adoring wife - and he just knew he was about to leave her for Izzie? I just don’t understand. Why did the writer decide to frame the departure in the form of a letter?
I imagine it had something to do with Katherine Heigel not wanting to return to the show so they had to make do. It just felt so surreal after he so clearly loved Jo.
Their wedding day was just adorable and happy and real where the wedding to Izzie was forced through illness.
What do you think of his departure? How would you have preferred for him to have left?

I (F18) just graduated from highschool with a 3.4 GPA and I cheated my entire way through highschool. It first started in freshman year when I was too depressed to leave my bed ever so I asked my friends to let me copy their work. I hope I didn't take advantage of them, but I did it for about 4 months until I got on antidepressants and started feeling better. By that time, I was a lazy piece of shit. I continued to cheat my way through every single test I took the rest of freshman year and sophomore year. I copied all of my friends notes and by the time ChatGPT rolled around I made all of my notes using that and never got caught. I had an entire elaborate system to how I cheat, to make it look like I'm working in class, to never do any work. At the end of my junior year, I created a program to automate doing my schoolwork assignments using generative AI like Llama2. It would generate all the work for the entire week in just a few minutes, and all I had to do was review it carefully for a few hours and edit until I felt it was perfect. I'm going to major in computer science as that's the only thing I seem to be good at. I was never caught one time cheating.
Also, I was able to cheat on tests because I would carefully carve answers into my pencils, write on my arm in tiny lettering (permanent marker), and would sometimes cheat by rolling up a tiny sheet of paper into a mechanical pencil and taking it out during the test. (The last one only worked until Sophomore year).

To say i’m PISSED is an understatement. Back in March I submitted a LOA for my pregnancy because my warehouse was not able to accommodate me, well DLS put their big pants on and requested many documents from my PCP which I provided within the timeframe but they were the ones that took forever, keep in mind I never signed the first forms they send giving them permission to contact any of my medical providers. They had never done it. So yesterday, barely heard back from an investigator accusing me of falsifying documents and faking my pregnancy. I explained to her, that my Obgyn is out of the country since I work at the border of CA/TJ so as being so close to the border, employees there get access to the mexican healthcare crossing the border. The way those doctors fill out forms are completely different and I let DLS know ahead of time and they said it was no issue at all. LIES. I’ve been under investigation since submitting documentation Mid April and was barely notified when they couldn’t reach my providers because obviously they still use HIPPA Laws and won’t share information with anyone but the patient. I also have an Obgyn in CA but barely go since I prefer the attention of the MX one. The investigator wants my mexican providers to forward her DIRECTLY the documents, one: they will not do because they cannot, and two: only one that can is my ObGyn and she is out of town. In mx there is no NA, MA, PA, JUST MD and only that one MD can go into your case unless a life threatening emergency. I contacted my Obgyn in CA and explained, they were more than happy to fax over the physician statements to back up my LOA, to which then the investigator replied and said she will not be taking those into consideration. She wants me to log onto my portal, sharing my username and password and showing her the steps of how to download those documents. Mexican healthcare doesn’t have a portal.. Lol. It’s been an argument back and forth, and I was not paid for the time I was given off. Never even placed on a LOA, just says pending and my schedule still shows. She’s being a big pain in the butt, and I want to quit. She has her head in her butt and is convinced I faked documents and faked my pregnancy even though I have several ultrasound pictures and other letters verifying my pregnancy along with due date. All statements have the stamp and license number of Obgyn’s. She contacted my Obgyn in CA also after I strictly told her not to, and the MA there left a detailed voicemail as to what she asked and requested. This is highly unprofessional. I will be placing in my resignation as no job is worth this much hassle. I was simply requesting an unpaid LOA. I’ll probably be flagged as Permaban but idc, they discriminated me with my first born too and didn’t accept documentation.

It just occured to me because I have just gotten accepted into a college as I am graduating junior college and decided to text my prof who taught me my major. I thanked her for writing my recommendation letter and for being hard on me because I felt I needed it. I just worry it comes off a certain way because she is particularly known for being so difficult as to cause students to switch majors. Does it sound like I'm sucking up, because I genuinely want to thank her. I was previously a student who was so used to being smart I put little to no effort and she changed that about me.

Diagnosed with CFS in March on top of ADHD, Autism, depression, and PTSD in 2022
Over the years, I've coped with my mental illness, usually hiding away in video games until the low feelings stop or become numb.
However, since my CFS diagnosis, my ability to game and hide away from all of the stress has become difficult. I barely game at all, not even cozy or Mario games.
I was kind of doing okay. I had some upsets and ideation when I felt doctors were ignoring test results, but I was able to rally after that.
However, now that I'm working on the forms for my disability claim, I feel SO overwhelmed. I've reached out to a lawyer who is going to help, but I've always been independent. I like to be in control. She's only going to write what I tell her, but it feels like something I should be able to do even though my eyes burn, letters have fuzzy edges, and there's pain behind my left eye if I push myself too hard.
(Going to see an eye therapist next week to see if I have BVD or some other tracking issue).
I feel so hopeless and unhelpful. I've always been the one to 'be strong' due to my upbringing. It's why I always pushed my mental health down.
But without my favorite way to cope, all I can do is watch a tiny bit of tv, be stuck with my thoughts, or sleep.
I've contacted a local therapy organization to see if they will honor my hospital's financial assistance and cover the cost of my sessions. I'd rather not use meds as I'm super sensitive to those I've taken in the past (this includes all meds).
But if they can't cover me, I just feel like I'm going to overflow with this feeling of drowning, which will then affect my husband. He supports me. He's done everything for me. But I don't like bringing him down if I can help it.
He says he doesn't mind, but I can see how my disability and the worry he feels wears on him.
I should be able to talk to him about these things, and yet, I just feel like I'd be hurting him more.

Transitioning to a permanent role, how to approach my manager?
I began a position this January covering a maternity leave in the legal team. Now, my colleague has presented her resignation letter, coinciding with the expiration of my contract. I see this as a great opportunity to continue with the company, especially since she recommended me for the position before leaving. However, being early in my career, I'm unsure about the best approach.
For reference, my colleague and I essentially formed the whole legal team together, with her in a senior role and me in a junior position. The person I am covering is a senior so I would still be a junior, the dynamic of the team would not change. While it seems like the perfect moment for me to step into her role, I'm not sure if I should approach my manager or wait for them to initiate the conversation.
Additionally,, I started working one month in advance and have been taking on work beyond my scope, aiming to give 200% effort and secure a place in the company after the person I'm covering returns, so I guess I can use that for something, maybe.
With three months remaining before the position needs to be filled, and her resignation being recent, I'm seeking advice on the best way to approach this situation. Any guidance or insights would be greatly appreciated!

I began a position this January covering a maternity leave in the legal team. Now, my colleague has presented her resignation letter, coinciding with the expiration of my contract. I see this as a great opportunity to continue with the company, especially since she recommended me for the position before leaving. However, being early in my career, I'm unsure about the best approach.
For reference, my colleague and I essentially formed the whole legal team together, with her in a senior role and me in a junior position. The person I am covering is a senior so I would still be a junior, the dynamic of the team would not change. While it seems like the perfect moment for me to step into her role, I'm not sure if I should approach my manager or wait for them to initiate the conversation.
Additionally,, I started working one month in advance and have been taking on work beyond my scope, aiming to give 200% effort and secure a place in the company after the person I'm covering returns, so I guess I can use that for something, maybe.
With three months remaining before the position needs to be filled, and her resignation being recent, I'm seeking advice on the best way to approach this situation. Any guidance or insights would be greatly appreciated!

Link to AO3
chapters 1&2
chapter 3
chapter 4
chapter 5
chapter 6
chapter 7
chapter 8
chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
The Academy looked normal enough from the distance but blew Gentry’s mind when she finally entered it. First of all, the way in lay through a massive winter garden full of the most luxurious botanical collection she’s ever seen. Not only that, but it seemed to be arranged in a way that offered spaces for hanging out as well as paths in and out. Here and there, G noticed little nooks with people’s voices coming from them and small murmuring streams gleamed in the sun that blazed through the transparent walls and roof. This place looked magical and invited to stay, enjoy the refreshing coolness and peace of mind. But Gentry had a good enough rest in her communal room the night before and was eager to start working on her first assignment that the System had spat out with a congratulating letter. Figuring out the controls of her new wristcomm was simple enough.
DEAR GENTRY!
WE ARE DELIGHTED TO INFORM YOU THAT YOU ARE THE FIRST CONTESTANT TO CLEAR ALL CHALLENGES AND OBTAIN THE STATUS OF AN ASHTAPADAN NEWCOMER! YOUR MEDICAL DATA HAS BEEN ANALYSED AND FOUND ACCEPTABLE.
IN THE ATTACHMENT TO THIS LETTER YOU WILL FIND A LIST OF RULES, RECOMMENDATIONS AND IDEAS THAT WILL DEFINITELY HELP YOU IN THE FIRST WEEKS IN OUR BEAUTIFUL CITY BUT WE STRONGLY RECOMMEND FINDING A BUDDY THAT WOULD BE YOUR MAIN GUIDE AND POTENTIALLY A NEW GREAT FRIEND! IT CAN BE ANY CITIZEN OR A MORE EXPERIENCED NEWCOMER.
YOUR CURRENT POINTS: 0
WHY NOT START EARNING SOME WITH YOUR FIRST ASSIGNMENT?
START ANY BEGINNER COURSE AT THE ACADEMY AND KEEP YOUR ATTENDANCE RATE OVER 80% — WORTH 50 POINTS
(OPTIONAL) FIND SOMEBODY WHO IS WILLING TO BECOME YOUR BUDDY — WORTH 20 POINTS
Without stopping to check if the vending machines offered anything good, G made her way through the dreamy garden and entered the inner yard that looked just like everything here: nothing too eye-catching at first glance but secrets hidden everywhere.
One thing she had already noticed was that most of the people had another piece of technology on their bodies besides the comm on their wrists: a sort of extendable visor that some of them kept engaged at all times. Those who were focused on the screen had a comical look on their faces, a thousand-mile stare, eyes wide even as they were talking to each other or going about their business. It was unclear yet why they would engage the screen for so long though. No one needed this much time to read a notification or check a map.
Take a group of young students by the fountain, for example. They seemed deep in conversation with each other yet their pupils didn’t focus on the person in front, but on the translucent screen over the top part of their faces. Was it some kind of virtual reality helmet?
If so, G needed one, too.
Perhaps she’d be able to make new friends this way.
There was something else that caught Gentry’s eye. Despite her initial disappointment about the severe lack of male hotness in the streets, people of both sexes seemed to really care about their appearance. Even those who probably weren’t naturally stunning were very interesting to look at not least because of the crazy fashion sense everyone here had. Never before had G seen so much variety in what everyone wore: countless variations on different national garments, some looking very traditional, like something one could see in a theatre, some — futuristic uniforms straight out of a sci-fi movie. It didn’t seem like anyone was concerned with gender norms here, too. At least in when it came to the outfits.
G hoped she didn’t look like a creepy stalker when her gaze lingered on a pair of very nicely shaped legs stretching from underneath a plaid skirt that belonged to a young man in the group sat by the edge of the water. A pair of snow-white knee-highs, flat loafers and neat raven hair with some blue streaks completed the image. His clothes fit him very well and weren’t inappropriate in the least: something an old money university student would wear.
A female student that is.
And he wasn’t alone. Here and there, among more conventionally dressed people, there were people wearing all sorts of things: a crazy mix of goth-like apparel but barefoot, men and women with heads covered with scarves, people in strange jewelery that looked like it weighed a ton and so on. Most importantly, no one seemed to care what the others looked like.
Was it paradise? Looks like the demo didn’t lie: it was heaven on earth.
The young man in the middle of the student gaggle caught her staring after all. With a dazzling smile, he waved in her direction as if they were great friends, and G waved back, face heating, hoping there wasn’t anyone behind her this tease was actually waving at. Thank god his shoes weren’t heeled, otherwise she would definitely have a heart attack right here, in the middle of the common area, on her first day.
Did he notice her ogling his legs? Judging by the giggles of his friend's entourage, they all did. The young flirt covered his mouth, eyes wide in mock indignation and pulled his knees in, as if hiding them from the improper attention, getting even more laughter from the rest of the company. G averted her eyes and tried to calm her breathing as she was on her way through the yard again, but before they all disappeared from her field of view, she noticed the coquette stretch his legs again and fall back on a friend of his, embracing the lucky man’s neck in an affectionate gesture, already forgetting G existed.
There was no way she wasn’t going to make some pretty boy do the same for her. Forget the assignment, put that in the list of her top priorities!
At first, Gentry was lost when she failed to find any kind of class schedule and there was no one to ask at the reception desk.
Why have a reception desk if nobody’s on duty?
Soon, however, it occurred to her that there was no schedule: each room within the wide marble corridors had a small display with a handwritten message scribbled on it.
Bachata for beginners
Product engineering (Tuesday class cancelled)
Colloidal chemistry (revision today)
None of these were the Communications course that Jey was talking about, but the variety definitely made G’s eyebrows go up.
Was she just supposed to barge into any class and sign up? Did she have to sign up later if she liked the subject? Was it ok to choose any?
After some wandering around, too scared to just walk in uninvited or ask others for directions, she finally stumbled across the door saying:
Communication & decision making course (Newcomers welcome)
With the desks arranged in a horseshoe and the people of various ages that were also apparently Newcomers, it all seemed comfortably casual. Everyone was chatting as she walked in, paying G no mind so she busied herself with the wristcomm that dinged at exactly the right time to save her the embarrassment of looking for a desk.
Would you like to enroll in this course? Scroll down to read the description.
Was this damn thing a spying device? Did it just know which room she was in? Jey didn’t joke when she said the little thing was going to be her primary aid!
“Are you looking for somewhere to sit?” called a young red-haired woman at one of the paired desks. “Here, this one is free.” She had the auglasses on, like everyone else, but they were off, showing her lively face and a pair of sharp green eyes.
“Thanks,” G said, gratefully taking the offer. “I’m new here, don’t know how things work yet.”
“It’s alright, the course is very engaging, you’ll love it.” — the woman held out a hand — “I’m Sereen, what’s your name?”
G shook the warm palm. “It’s Gentry. And by new I mean I’m new to Ashtapada, not just the course. Literally arrived yesterday.”
“Really?” — S looked surprised — “Everything must be very confusing!”
“You have no idea,” G smiled. “I’m glad someone understands. Everyone’s friendly but acts as if giant mechanical dogs in the streets and a moss garden in the lobby are the most normal things ever.”
“Don’t worry, I was just like you when I first arrived, you’ll get the hang of it soon.”
“Hope so! Is that the lecturer?”
“Shhh...”
Just like everything else in Ashtapada, the lecture started out normal enough only to unfold into something completely alien to how things were normally done.
Apparently, the Communications course involved learning rationality, debating, logic, etiquette and god knew what else. It was supposed to give the future citizens tools to, well, communicate. G was given a booklet with some ground rules for beginners that included entries that sounded like something Sun Tzu would say if he studied debating instead of warcraft.
“The purpose of any argument is not to win it and not to change the other disputant’s mind. It’s to find the truth.”
“Always argue in good faith.”
“Don’t attack your opponent.”
“If attacked, dismiss the attack as if it didn’t happen.”
Well, hopefully, it only meant verbal attacks! G knew too well that when it came to physical violence, it was hard to ignore it.
Most of the rules looked straightforward enough, some were confusing.
“Seek challenge to your convictions. Avoid echo chambers.”
“Don’t seek being right.”
“Be mindful of your audience including yourself.”
“Avoid “Empty arguments” that don’t bring everyone closer to the goal of finding the truth.”
The lecturer, a willowy man of about sixty that drowned in his tweed jacket, started the class with a bit of small talk with the regulars after distributing the booklets to all first-timers. He made sure to give it to G face down so that his photo under the “About the author” title didn’t go unnoticed. He also made most of the “talk” part himself.
“I never took part in a debate,” G told Sereen, who was patiently waiting for the class to begin. “And never seen anything like these rules. Is it actually useful?”
“Oh, believe me, professor Poe will be ecstatic to talk to you about them. He can’t not start discussing his subject at the slightest provocation. Look.” — she raised her hand — “Professor, how was your weekend?”
The man wearily smiled. “That might seem like a meaningless question, Sereen, but it’s actually very much related to the topic we are going to cover today.”
“See?” — S raised her eyebrows with a suppressed smile. G giggled. This promised to be interesting.
“Our friend Sereen is a very polite person, isn’t she?” — Poe smiled at the class but his eyes glided over everyone’s faces, gaze turned inwards like he was reading an invisible text written on the walls. “But as kind as she is, I don’t think she’s actually interested in how my weekend went. Small talk is just a social custom we engage in to strengthen our social relations. Why don’t we just start a day by saying “Hi! I value our relationship and would like to fulfill my societal role!” to everyone we know? I would definitely prefer THAT over the small talk! He-he!”
The audience laughed politely. The guy seemed alright.
“However, just as we use different tools to fulfill this role in different contexts, so can the context of a logical problem steer our thinking towards a rational, that is, right, and an irrational, that is, wrong, answer.”
“Well, that’s not a given,” Gentry mumbled under her breath but it went unnoticed by S, who was already immersed in the lecture.
“Consider the famous René Descartes’s quote "Cogito, ergo sum". Who can translate it from Latin?” — the board behind the thin, almost transparent man glowed, displaying the words.
“Is it really a Beginner’s course?” G asked Sereen in a low voice but her companion was already raising her hand, together with a dozen other students.
“I think, therefore I am,” she said after a curt nod of the lecturer’s permission.
“Very good,” he continued, pleased. “I taught you well. Those of you who attend my lectures regularly are familiar with the notion of solipsism, which states that the only thing we can be sure about is our own thoughts.”
Gentry looked at S with raised eyebrows.
If this is an introductory course, what was the advanced like?
Sereen didn’t seem to perplexed. She was fully following the thread.
“However,” professor Poe said. “I am going to challenge that notion by demonstrating that we can’t trust our own mind when it comes to perceiving reality.”
He looked at the audience with a quizzical eye, and pointed at Gentry with a long bony finger “You, new girl. I want you to close your eyes.”
Why her?
Gentry was only happy to hide behind her eyelids. No doubt the whole room was now staring at her.
Through the blood rushing in her ears, she heard the old man’s voice, “Who was sitting beside you before you closed your eyes?”
“My new friend Sereen,” G answered and heard a little gasp of appreciation from the woman.
“So you know she existed as long as you two were whispering behind my back. However, now that you can’t see or hear her. How do you know she exists?”
“Well, I can reach with my hand and touch her,” Gentry said, demonstrating.
“Yes, this is what most people answer,” Poe said. “You can open your eyes now. But let me ask you this: how would you know it was her, an not some other person that took her place?”
Gentry’s intuition was right: everyone was staring, as if waiting for her answer.
“Well, I suppose— ”
“Hush, it was a rhetorical question,” the professor cut her off. “The correct answer is that you can’t know that. We think we can trust our senses or at least our thoughts, but this is also false. Everyone, look out of the window.”
Everyone did.
The day was as fine as Gentry was annoyed.
What did this pops think of himself?
“I’d ask what you see, but I already know the answer,” he went on. “All of you would say “the sky”. And all of you would be wrong, because sky doesn’t exist. We only see the endless emptiness of the outer space, but perceive it as a blue dome. It’s an illusion, a phantom, born out of our collective unconscious.”
Sereen whispered, lost in the lecture, “Ah, yes, Carl Jung.”
What?
Was it supposed to be obvious?
“But listen to this,” he continued, voice booming like a demiurge’s in the completely silent room. “Listen to this. How many words is it? Listentothis. Our common sense says it’s three words while in reality it’s just a string of sounds I an producing with my mouth. I am literally making you hallucinate the spaces between the words I’m saying. With knowing that our perception is so flawed, how can we know that we even know how to think?”
“I’m sorry, professor, I disagr...” G started but got struck down by his serrated gaze.
“I’ll invite questions at the end, young miss,” he chopped out.
Sereen’s eyes were sympathetic. It looked like most if not all of professor Poe’s students had learned not to interrupt him.
He went on, “Anyway, the fact that you even understand what I am saying is in itself incredible and shouldn’t be possible.”
“But it IS possible, right?” G whispered to Sereen. “I mean, aren’t we understanding this as he speaks?”
“PLEASE refrain from talking unless asked!” professor Poe roared.
Impressive lung capacity for such a frail human being!
G begrudgingly did as she was told. The guy seemed to be enjoying this power trip a bit too much to her taste.
“Now, since most of you,” he put some emphasis on the word to shut up another pair of whispering students. “Most of you think you comprehend my words, you must know that there is a way to tell that something is real, even though we can’t rely on our senses for perception. I’m giving you a minute to discuss with your partners what it might be.”
G considered it. She and Sereen exchanged equally confused glances.
Like a dutiful student, S started summarising Poe’s arguments but Gentry listened with only half an ear. She felt that behind all this over-thinking was a clear and simple answer.
She watched the professor walk along the aisles, tuning into one or another conversation before leaving each with a smug head shake of disapproval.
What was there to think about? Even if they didn’t see the world precisely as it was, something was definitely real, right? The chair she felt under her buttocks, the air around, the low murmur of the students. The annoying professor that… looked a little too translucent.
Gentry waited for the man to approach their desks and tune into Sereen’s musings. As he came so near they could reach out and touch him, Gentry did just that.
To her utter shock, her hand went through the old jacket and sent a wave of static over the professor’s figure, his whole form glitching and flickering.
Professor Poe was a hologram!
Unable to help herself, Gentry said, “No wonder you don’t think anything is real, Professor, you are hardly real yourself!”
The whole roomful of people stared, transfixed, at the surreal scene of a student’s arm disappearing into the teacher’s abdomen.
Gentry looked back at Sereen in search of support.
Was it laughter in her eyes?
Poe’s blood drained from his face, the mouth slacked open, twitching as if trying to form some words, but none came out.
Sereen chimed in, “You never told us you were a simulation, Professor.”
“Out!” Poe gritted lowly so that no one really heard him.
“I’m sorry?” G asked, innocently.
“Out of my class!” he exploded, jumping out of Gentry’s reach with an enraged grimace. “I am as real as you are!”
G stood up and looked at her hand then back at Professor Poe.
How much rage could storm in those watery eyes?
Then, she winked at her new friend.
“Let’s go then, shall we?” she said.
Sereen looked lost for a second, her eyes darting pack and forth between Gentry and Poe. Then, her gaze seemed to cloud a little, as if she retreated into her own head, but when she resurfaced, she nodded with a mischievous smile.
Both young women left the room, the classmates’ sympathetic silence and Poe’s angry seething seeing them off.
***
“What a way to start my first day,” Gentry said. “My hands are still trembling a bit.”
She and S were calming their nerves in the green winter garden, the soothing sound of the little running streamlet at their feet a welcome distraction.
“Believe it or not, his course is actually quite useful,” Sereen laughed. “Who would have thought the old Poe is actually not human? I guess we never thought of poking him in the stomach before. This is going to be the talk of the Academy for the next month or so!”
“Is it? I feel bad now. I guess I’m not getting any points for attending this lecture, right?” — Gentry checked her wristcomm — “It says “zero progress” and something else… ad.. Honi… adhonim…”
Sereen laughed, “Yeah, you adhominem’ed good old Poe, no wonder you got zero credit!”
“What does it mean?”
“You’ve seen the rules of learning and discourse, right?” S said. “There are no-nos, things that aren’t allowed, especially when it comes to Rationality classes and the like. Ad Hominem means an attack on the speaker, not their argument. It isn’t exactly what you did, but I guess it’s the closest thing!”
“Ad Hominem, huh,” G said. “Well, I guess I deserve it then. Thanks for standing by me.”
If it wasn’t for Sereen, G wasn’t sure she would be going to return to the Academy any time soon!
“You just chose a wrong course as your first class, G,” — no doubt about that! — “But another lecturer who works here is much more open-minded and he also teaches Rationality. I think you’ll enjoy him more than our old Poe. His next class is in a couple of days. Wanna come?”
***
DEAR GENTRY!
CONGRATULATIONS ON COMPLETING AN OPTIONAL ASSIGNMENT! 20 POINTS HAVE BEEN ADDED TO YOUR STATUS COUNTER.

We live in a terrace of four houses / end terrace. To the immediate left of our end terrace house is an access lane that serves the rear of the terrace.
The houses were built in 1939.
The access lane is the only way you can get to the garages built at the end of the four gardens.
Previously a lot of land to the rear of the terrace was owned by the church. They sold a large amount of the land to the council which built a school. The church retained the title register for the access lane. At the end of the lane which is about 100m long is a hard right turn at our garage for access to the other houses’ garages. The land behind the garages has no title registration on the land registry, so doesn’t appear to be own by anyone.
The garages (according to our conveyancing documents) have been accessed by this lane since at least 1950, so essentially all of time.
The householders have just received a letter from the church stating they’re offering us first refusal on the land via an EOI and depending on our offer may market the land on the open market.
We don’t know what to do. We need to drive down this lane to access our garages. The church appears to, at some point in the past, have acknowledged this and retained the land allowing continued access. If it is sold, it would be theoretically possible to build something on it - maybe a workshop or a garage, but this would block access to our garages.
I’ve been researching easements but as the church land leads on to an unregistered parcel of land, it doesn’t appear clear that an easement will apply.
Any advice would be appreciated to enable us to challenge the church.
Thanks!

Recently, I have been receiving calls every weekday from various numbers, which I originally thought were the typical scam calls I receive on my phone from time to time. However, the other day I noticed that one of the numbers had a ‘verified by the carrier’ checkbox, and reverse looked them up with the lookup saying that number and other numbers are from “Midland Credit Management.” It looks like they have been calling my # every weekday since 5/1. They have never left any messages.
The things is, I don’t have any debt. My credit score is in 810s-830s range, so I’m confused as to why they would be calling me. I have moved several times over the past 3-10 years, so I suppose it is theoretically possible that there was some unknown closing fee for a various utility service, but my mail was being forwarded by USPS for 1 year after each move so I doubt this. I have not received anything in the mail, and my credit report (which I’ve read debt collectors can access) does have my current address since I have an active loan on the house I’m living in.
I plugged in my basic info into their site (which asked for last name, month/year of birth, and last 4 of SSN) with both my current and maiden last names, and it did not pull up any account. I also pulled up my credit reports and it shows no missed/late payments or collection account as of (5/11).
My significant other says I shouldn’t answer or give them any info about myself because they might try to pin whatever they are calling about on me, irrespective of whether it was a legitimate debt, or whether the debt was actually my debt. He reckons that if they have something legitimate which is attached to my name/identity, they should have enough of my personal information and I should receive a letter or other form of contact from them. It should also appear on my credit report if they have an open account on me.
I’ve had this cell # for 2 decades, so it’s unlikely to e someone’s previous number. However my first and previous last name are both very common names (there are many people with my name), so perhaps if they were looking for someone they got my number that way?
Should I answer their calls? Or is my husband correct? I’m definitely afraid to talk to them because when I research them they sound pretty scummy. What would happen if I continued to ignore the calls? Is he correct that if I were to ignore the calls I should receive other communication if it’s something legit and intended for me? I worry that if they did try to contact and it was something legit, what if they send it to a wrong address?!

Hi I have a bizarre situation I hope someone can help me with. I recently received a letter in the mail from a California collections firm about an unpaid fine from August, 2013.
The ticket is from San Luis Obispo County and after looking up the referenced case number, the specific citation is for "POSSESSION OF OPEN CONTAINERS OR CONSUMPTION OF ALCOHOLIC BEVERAGES IN PUBLIC PLACES".
For context, I do not live in California, but I did go to San Luis Obispo to visit a relative around that time. I 100% did not get a ticket or even interact with any LEO in any way while I was there. My relative was graduating from college, and I briefly parked (my rental car) at their house while I was there. I definitely wouldn't be surprised if some college kids were drinking around there at the time, but I know I did not drink (in public) nor would I have left an open container lying around. Maybe some police officer just assumed it was someone related to the car and wrote a ticket that went to the rental car agency that (eventually) gave them my name?
Not sure, I can only speculate at this point. What I do know is that this is the first time I am hearing about this. I never received a ticket or notification in the mail over the last 11 years, and now they are asking for ~$900.
So my question is - What is my recourse here? Is there a statute of limitations for these kind of things? Will the collection agency pursue me in any other way? Do they have the authority to record a judgement against me in my home state? Is it safe to ignore this?
Any advice or suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Thank you in advance!

I am currently designing a script that can be used to transcribe every Turkic language accurately in a way that clearly connects them with ancient Turkic people and each other. Runic, arabic, and latin are in my opinion either too imprecise or foreign for this purpose, so I am interested in making my own script. However, I would like some additional input from you on what kind of script would be more ideal for this purpose.
I have a few ideas in mind. Firstly, I would like to not distinguish voiced and voiceless characters except through diacritics or other markers, similar to Japanese and Korean. That way, there will be a clear visual similarity between these letters regardless of whether it has voiced or devoiced over time and between languages. Voicing doesn't seem to affect the meaning of most native Turkic words except at the end, so this should simplify the script a bit. I would also like to base the shape of the letters on something that would hold significance in ancient Turkic life, such as horses, yurts, dogs, wolves, numbers, and the sky. I am interested in making a dual script system where there are curved and angular scripts used for different purposes, similar to japanese kana. However, that's about where my ideas for this script end.
I have a few questions on what kind of script would you prefer.
Would you want it to be an alphabet, abjad, syllabary, or abugida? Alphabets would be the safe option. Abjads are not quite suited for Turkic languages, however, as seen in Arabic. I am interested in experimenting with syllabaries and abugidas, but Turkic syllable structures and the abundance of vowels may make this very complicated. Or we could compromise and go for something similar to Korean Hangul, which is essentially an alphabet compressed into syllable blocks. This type of script is compatible with Turkic, although unique.
What would the shape of the letters be? Should they be angular and sharp, like they're carved on stone? Or round and curvy, like they're written on ink? Perhaps both?
Should each vowel have its own symbol or should they be grouped into pairs based on frontness/rounding? If grouped, should they be distinguished with diacritics or just by context?
Same with the consonants. Should they all have their own symbols? Should they be distinguished on voicing? Frontedness? This would be akin to the Orkhon script, where consonants are doubled into front and back pairs. In that script, letters like k and q are paired, along with g and ğ. Establishing a clear relationship between similar sounding letters in languages where these sounds do have a relationship would indeed be an advantage, but I'm not sure what I should differentiate them on.
How many scripts should be part of this system? I am interested in making a secondary script to pair with it, which could work like the uppercase-lowercase system in Greek-derived scripts like Latin and Cyrillic, or like the hiragana-katakana system of Japanese kana, however it is not necessary. Still, the pairing of angular and round versions of the same letters in a way that connotes additional information and tone strikes a chord in my brain.
What should the shape of the letters be? Should they be based on the shape of the mouth, things that would be present in daily life, nearby scripts, or completely random? Anything else? This is something really crucial, so I'd like to know your thoughts on this one as much as possible
Should I add letters for sounds that are rare or aren't used in Turkic languages outside of loan words? I'm talking letters like w, zh, ts, dz, th, dh, and f, which only appear natively in a few Turkic languages. Perhaps I could add additional letters as part of an Altaic DLC.
Also, what way should the script be written? Left to right like Latin? Right to left like Orkhon and Arabic? Top to down like Mongolian, Japanese, Korean, and Chinese? Or a mixture of both? I personally prefer top to bottom and a combination of left to right.
If you have any other suggestions for this supposed script, please let me know.

My son is turning 8 this weekend and we have a party scheduled for Sunday afternoon. Yesterday we were informed by his school that he pulled another kid's pants and underwear down. We were obviously not happy with this incident, explained how it's wrong and gave an appropriate punishment by taking electronics away. This morning, I got a call from his principal telling me how he attacked a kindergartner at recess before school started and was pushing him down to the ground and spanking him. The child is traumatized. I am absolutely beside myself. Of course, there will be MANY punishments coming his way, including apology letters. We will be taking away all electronics, no play dates, he has to go work for his dad doing some hard labor, and an early bedtime. I am also looking into therapy for him. This is obviously a pretty big deal, so should I also cancel his birthday party?

Kind of a more lighthearted post (kinda) but something I think we can all rally around. This whole experience is a roller coaster and sometimes its good to have an accompanying score. This is my short divorce playlist that I am continuing to add to. Please know... like most of us, some days I'm angry, other days sad... its all reflected here... its all normal.

1. Justin Townes Earle - Frightened by The Sound
2. Jason Isbell & the 400 Unit - If You Insist
3. Bleachers - How Dare You Want More (Live)
4. The Gaslight Anthem - Positive Charge
5. Taking Back Sunday - New Music Friday
6. Taking Back Sunday - Juice 2 Me
7. Mumford & Sons - Ditmas
8. Dawes - Somewhere Along the Way
9. Dawes - St. Augustine at Night
10. Sons of the East - You Might Think
11. Noah and the Whale - Blue Skies
12. Gang of Youths - Keep Me In the Open
13. Frank Turner - Letters
14. Jason Isbell - Songs That She Sang in the Shower
15. Ryan Adams - Outbound Train

Feel free to add your own song recommendations in this thread or on the linked Spotify playlist:
https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5zZ2yBbEGAY0HCAYQw3fZx?si=4uMOMB93RS2kSPmR3Jb46g&pi=u-NPtOt1D0RZi3

So this is the sequel to this: https://www.reddit.com/CRedit/comments/1ckx033/preapprovals/
Over the weekend I pulled the lever for the SavorOne who of course pulled all 3. They told me I needed to verify my identity so I sent them a copy of my ID. A few hours ago I got an email saying I was approved with a SL of 3K and that the card was on its way. Exciting!
Yesterday I decided that I would apply for a secured card as well in case the SavorOne gave me a crappy limit, so I also applied for the BOA Custom Rewards Secured card, but was denied, even after they preapproved me for it. I'm waiting for the letter saying why. I wonder if it's because of our rough history in the very distant past (even though they aren't on my reports anymore... do they blacklist?).
My final option was the Discover it secured card which also preapproved me. Applied and approved for $2500. They have yet to take the money out of my bank account.. hopefully it will be here before I go on vacation.
Both pulled Experian which had a FICO of 633.
Thanks all here for your advice! I will continue the credit repair and rebuilding... this was great motivation! (not counting BOA).

Okay so I’m guessing he was from around the nineties with the way he spoke, i remember every time i would go to my nanas old house id play with him. He was like this like brown kind of colour with red overalls and he had like the ABC’s on his stomach and if you would press the button with a specific letter such as “A” he would say “apple” or something like that, i’m sure there was little pictures next to it. I’ve tried to look it up but google is no help.