My youger sister is about to go to college. As a gift, my gf bought her a SUPER expensive hair appointment, like hundreds of dollars, to get her hair professionally done and dyed. It looked really nice but after about a day my sister decides she doesn't like it, and re-dyes the whole thing. Fuck dude 🤦‍♂️. I know both of them well enough:
• my GF will get really upset
• my sister will in turn say some shit like "it's my hair, I do what I want!!" and also get upset
• they will both be in horrible moods and it will be stressful
I'm trying to figure out a way to mitigate the damage and keep them on good terms. I already sent my gf some money to cover the cost of the hair appointment and I'm trying to figure out what else to do lol.

Okay so I'm thinking of getting my first ever Lolita dress soon and I'm looking at 42lolita and I found one that's very cute. Sweet Lolita, carousel pattern, Chiffon JSK, and it says the back has shirring. It says the largest size is 86 CM, aka 33.9 inches, I think back shirring affects waist, correct me if I'm wrong. My waist is around 88.9 CM, aka around 35 inches, so only a bit bigger than the biggest size, so I'm wondering how much bigger shirring makes the dress and if y'all will think the shirring will be able to help me fit?

I (23F) have been trying to get disability accommodations for testing at my school so I went to my school’s health clinic to get a diagnosis for adhd.
Here’s a little background: all my life, I’ve struggled academically and I can 100% pinpoint it to my terrible attention span. Anyone who knows me, knows my attention span is limited and will jokingly say I might be on some sort of spectrum ( i am not autistic, i met all my milestones). I was always getting into trouble because I didn’t pay attention and was a bit slower at learning subjects than most kids growing up. I was very talkative and I constantly would daydream and obsess over boys I liked to get me through gradeschool. I did my fair amount of research of how adhd presents in girls and most of what I’ve read and done my research on, aligns with my symptoms. I may have OCD as well but it’ll be too long to explain all of that as well.
I did two computer tests at my school recently, one with X’s and letters popping up on a screen and a test with beeps left and right. A week after the test, the psych intern at my school said that I didn’t have adhd because I “scored higher” than those with adhd do. Is it just me who finds this test unreliable? I was in a quiet environment which is why I think I was able to do well but I don’t know what I should do now. She said she wanted me to come back and do extra tests for OCD but I didn’t have time so I’m not sure what to do now. Sorry if it’s long, I just feel like I always need to explain myself to ppl because they might think I’m self diagnosing but usually ppl will see how apparent it is once they know me.

Exactly what it says in the title.
I've never had any major positive influences in my life to teach me basic life and social skills, like how to dress properly, how to groom, etc. My father was not a big part of my life growing up and I've never been in a relationship so I don't have any trusted people in my life to ask these sorts of questions. I don't trust asking people in my social circle for fear of getting self-affirming answers; I want an unbiased, outside source to tell me what I'm doing wrong and give me an honest assessment of my shortcomings.
The things I need help with: how to buy good-looking clothes that fit me well, are somewhat stylish (or at least not bad), how to maintain a good personal appearance, and/or how to develop good social skills (how to talk to people, make conversation, etc.). I feel terrible in basically every social interaction because I feel like I come off as an unattractive person due to a combination of any or all of these things.
This all came about as part of an extended conversation with my therapist; I mentioned not feeling confident in social situations and started listing possible reasons why, and my therapist challenged me to try and solve some of these issues. I would prefer someone close to my age (35) to get age-appropriate advice if possible. Willing to pay handsomely for this as well (I know this is a very unusual request and don't want to take anyone's help for free).

Little context why I am writing this. I work 30 hours at a takeout only restaurant and rest of the time I do doordash after college. I am located in NYC.
I have been working at this restaurant since 2023 June. At that time there was no delivery drivers wage mandate in NYC. Our sales are mostly ubereats. If we get 50 orders in uber we get 10 and 10 at dd and gh. GH is good as always. Doordash doesnt provide enough info but on the ubereats restaurant app u can see what car, name and location of the delivery rider. At that time, earlier December 2023. Delivery drivers were mostly Hispanic people. And everything was logical. Delivery drivers names were also hispanic.
However, lets come to the point. Last 3 months me and my manager figured out something is wrong with the delivery drivers account that show up in the app. Please dont judge me or I am not judging anybody.
As I said it was mostly hispanic riders and everything was logical. Now 80% of the riders are French speaking. Mostly from Afrian regions. How do I know? Well most of them enter the store and looks at me and instantly recognize I am muslim. So they start to say greetings any arabic. They speak 0 English and speak french and arabic. Um not tryna complain about language.
Here is the twist. I ask them brother whats your name. Most of them says my name is Abdul, Mohammed, Mohamadu, Abdullah. But when I look at our restaurants app I see its actually him but the names are like JASON, ANTHONY, ANDREW. It doesnt make sense. I told my manager look whats happening. Oneday me and my manager engaged in a conversation with a guy. He speaks English. I asked him his name he says brother I am Mohammed. Then I told him but it says jason. He says yes I am Mohammed Jason. If you know you know it just simply doesnt make sense.
Yesterday night my manager engaged in a conversation with another guy. He said he pays $200 a month for the ubereats driver id. I couldnt find anyone how they doing this. I need to make a friend with one of them to figure out whats going on.
I am not judging anyone based on their language, country, colour or their immigration status.

When I just got my first testosterone injection, (in my upper arm, was supposed to be in my thigh or glute but that's what the nurse did) it was an instant AWFUL pain, like, AWFUL pain, by far worse than when I sprained my ankle or any other pain I've experience. For like 2 minutes I was screaming in the room. I'm still trying to figure out if this is normal, and how the hell you all get through it every time you do it. I see people who say it doesn't hurt? There's no way. I barely felt the needle itself but as soon as the testosterone went in, and I know it's a thick substance, but man.

So my boy is 1 and I've had him since he was 8 weeks. He's a real character and very friendly with any visitors I have and he used to be quite cuddle as a kitten. However, he's always had one quality that I thought he would grow out of but it's just got increasingly worse. He constantly 'attacks' me at random. By attack I mean he hunts me, I would call it playing but it's getting to the point where I think he genuinely hates me. He never goes for my flatmate, he always goes for me, she just leaves the room if he gets too playful but I live in a 2 bed apartment and all my stuff is in the lounge so I don't have that option. He doesn't hiss or scratch, its more of a pounce and grab with his claws and teeth.
He's nice to me in the morning (until he demands food) and he's nice for about 5 minutes after I get home from work, and then he's straight to being playful and running around like a maniac. He used to come and sit on my lap for a while (before biting me again) but now he doesn't even do that, he sometimes retreats to his hammock for a nap and I get 5 minutes peace. But as soon as he's awake he's always sat behind me ready to pounce or biting my feet, I honestly cannot deal with it anymore. I do play with him, he has a huge cat tree as well and lots of toys (including a wand). But after a few minutes of playing he gets bored of the toys and goes straight back to me. I've tried blowing on him, telling him no, spraying with water (which I didn't want to do but I got desperate), they all work for a second and then he's straight back on to me. I got him neutered last month but it doesn't seem to have made a difference. It's at the point I just have to pick him up and lock him out the room and he calms for a bit and then attacks me again. I've had cats when I was growing up and they were all a little playful but never to this degree, I don't get a moments peace and I'm constantly on edge.
I'm at the point where I'm seriously considering having to give him up for adoption because it causes me so much stress (and pain) but I love him so much and he's the first cat I've had on my own. I would really appreciate any help I get.

This happened a while ago and this’ll be a bit long, so here’s the TL;DR. TL;DR: Weapon had a curse that made me want it by all means necessary; Flying leviathan sized worm eats it. I blow it up and it’s flaming body hurtles with me into a “dinosaur” park
Context: I play a bugbear rouge in a setting where me and my fellow adventurers were picked by an enigmatic rich and powerful adventurer to be his heirs, despite the fact we had never met him. (Turns out he picked a ton of these heirs.) All we had to do was show we were heroic enough to earn his incomprehensibly big fortune.
Our adventures included things like us hunting down a bat man who was turning children into rats. Infiltrating a cult and getting a demon tattooed to us (to which we subsequently let a holy army deal with that nonsense). Getting charmed by a massive slime queen and then further mind controlled to spread the slime’s influence, almost getting a higher up of the city. And we even had to deal with an undead mindflayer, who’s phylactery turned out to be a mech, so we just called a god to smite it. Not knowing the DM intended to have that mech focus on fighting an elder brain dragon, so we had to deal with that separately.
Our story really picks up here, after beating both the undead mindflayer and elder brain dragon, we finally get some time to search the place. I find a rather magical looking spear and shield on a long since dead body. Like the idiot I am, I pick both up without thinking, just wanting to take more. Turns out, while both items were extremely powerful, they were also extremely cursed. Just one of their various curses included a curse of obsession. Suddenly, I never wanted either item to ever leave my side and I would do anything to get them, and I was also inclined to use them above other weapons. (To be fair, I was inclined to use them anyway since they were both extremely powerful)
Cut to like a week or so later and we’re on the hunt for a certain artifact an oracle told us about. Turns out that it’s inside a “dinosaur” park. I say “dinosaur” with quotes because the place, while having dinosaurs, also had just a bunch of magical creatures. We’re greeted by Jackson, advertised to by Jackson and shown around by Jackson. (The owner had cloned himself and he’s the only one running the park). Eventually getting to a more wild and open area that we’re advised is dangerous.
Cut again to a bit later, we hear a cry for help. We go to check but find a creature that can mimic voices, and an already dead body by it. I climb back down, disinterested, using magical sticky gloves to easily climb down. My party watches though, and soon enough, more creatures arrive with a still living girl.
Fast forward to me climbing back up, using my gun since they were so far away, missing horribly and creating a VERY loud noise, attracting more of these things… along with a T-Rex. I use Fear from my Ring of Animal Influence to scare the T-Rex away and throw my spear to decimate many of the creatures, impaling one of them.
This is where things go bad…
A gigantic leviathan sized flying worm comes out of nowhere, and with its maw, big enough to eat a T-Rex whole, it swallows three of those creatures, including the one I impaled… my spear, to which I am cursed to absolutely be obsessed with, is in the cavernous mouth of this thing. By the time I realize, my companions try to stop me, but I break away. It still seems too late though, the thing is already 30ft in the air in the blink of its turn. But… I have a dagger that lets me teleport behind (and only behind) an enemy 30ft away. I run after this thing, jumping off a cliff and teleporting right onto this things back. Using my sticky gloves to hold on as it flys hundreds of feet into the air.
Skipping a lot of trial and error of me trying to hurt this thing, or stop it.
I realize the only way I’m getting my spear back is by going in… it senses me on its teeth immediately, and while I do find a gap to hide from its bite, its acidic spit lathers me a bit. Still determined, I crawl inside… I can’t see it, my much needed spear, and a “throat” is alternating between “open enough to fit a double decker bus”, and “your hand could maybe fit”. Seeing no choice, I instead stab the throat, as my tertiary unexpected choice. And that choice flings me right out, with me hardly holding onto his teeth as it’s even more acidic puke dissolves me.
I heal up a bit right there. You know… just hundreds of feet in the air, right on a gigantic worm’s teeth.(Turns out, easy to do when you can one-hand it with magic gloves)
At this point, I say “screw this thing, my spear might be dissolving in that!” And with that, I use my super weapon. You see, I have a crown that can cast ANY fire spell as long as enough charges are spent… but the thing has 20 charges… and the DM ruled that I can expend more charges then what would be required for the highest level spells, at the risk of a 50/50 break. I don’t care about some stupid crown, I want this monster that ate my spear, dead! “All 20 charges!”
What proceeded to happen was… well, the mere charging of this thing caused the monsters teeth to burn away. I only survived that kind of power from my shield (the other item I’m obsessed with by that curse), which gave me fire immunity.
I couldn’t see anything, but outside the blast, druids and mages and all kinds of people watched in horror as this gigantic flaming meteor of a corpse plunged from the air, heading to the biggest tree in the park. With me as the tip of it, as bright as a star. These magic wielders attempted to staunch the ball of fire, but no one was prepared for this, and no one knew just how much power was behind this thing. With smoke and fire covering me whole, along with spells and shields being launched at me, I go unconscious during my free fall.
Surprisingly, thanks to my earlier heal, as well as a big health pool anyway, terminal velocity and all those spells didn’t even bring me to zero. Though I did have to spend all 9 of my hero dice (which is stuff we earned for doing heroic things, allowing us to add as many d6’s as we want to any roll), just to not break my arm. I only just managed the check with all of that.
I awake in a crater, fire quickly spreading around me into the nearby forests full of life. I raise my fire shield and expend almost all its power to call all the fire to me. All the flames trailing like tendrils of fire to my shield. The flames now extinguished, I crawl out and look for my spear.
I find it.
(By the way, I mentioned all that stuff about our other adventures to make it somewhat clear that we all have a ton of magic items at this point. I would have mentioned them all first, but with so many, it was just easier to just use them and not explain too much. Hell, I didn’t even mention we met with a nature goddess(?) who gave me the power to heal myself and alter enemies through nature. Heck, I hardly mentioned my team mates either and their own wacky items and abilities!)
Hope you enjoyed reading this. We were laughing the whole way at how assured this was… just because this thing decided to eat my spear. Oh, and that fire crown didn’t break.

I feel like I am going crazy!!!! I'm in high school (16F) and I was never interested in dating. I've been confessed to by both guys and girls who I didn't relation have any relation to. There is this guy who I've been aware of but never interested him. Last year he was in a play and I thought he was attractive, nothing more. This year, second semester he followed my Instagram out of nowhere. I became close with one of his friends which made me see him more, still no communication between us. We were both at the same event together and I noticed we were talking a decent amount, that's also because my friends knew him and were talking with him. That night he started to send me tons of Instagram reels, also thought nothing of it.
We started just sending each other reels. I decided to participate in a club he was in because of a friend who was also friends with him. That's when I started really talking to him. We would just joke around; I can't even say what we talked about because it was very random. He found my snapchat probably through quick add and we started snapping each other as well. We started talking a LOT more and I realized I had some sort of feelings for him.
This all is very sweet but here is the issue, we both have experienced very similar traumatic events and have connected through that. I have struggled with relationships for that reason, and I believe he has too. He is a very attractive person and have never dated anyone, many girls have liked him, but I found out he has 'rejected' all of them. I do not know if this is because he is not wanting a relationship or if he just did not have feelings for those girls. I am too worried to say anything romantic to him as I do not want him to ghost me.
The last thing I want to do is make him feel as if I do really like him and for him to get uncomfortable. If I knew 100% that he does not want a relationship I would back off and remain friends. I am not in love with him, we have a great friendship but if I were to be offered more, I'd take it. Does that make sense?
He is a very genuine person and asks me how my day is sometimes which doesn't seem like a lot, but it means a lot to me. He does not text much online and he's very anti-social but still has a lot of friends?
I feel like there is attraction there. We are going out for coffee together soon but it is not a date. He has offered to drive me around places and that is also very sweet.
TLDR: I kind of like a guy but I am not sure how he feels about relationships, I do not want to pressure him into anything.

Why would RC dilute the 75M DRS total out in an instant after years of effort? I believe RC really cares about his investors. Say GME squeezes into the thousands. What would happen? You would get ordinary people trying to FOMO in too late, and in the end getting wiped out when regulators intervene or buy button shenanigans occur. Instead, he is showing a controlled burn strategy. Just up.
Up cycles, sell high, down cycles will inevitably be shorted, buyback low. Now they have the extra capital to prepare for the down cycle in the upcoming years. I believe this will be a long road of acquisitions, buybacks, dividends, and share issuance. RC will trade for us and take care of his investors. He is in fact the largest shareholder by far of GME, so taking care of himself and his team as well. MOASS was a fun dream, but regardless, hodlers are probably set for life. It just may not have been as sudden as we would've liked.

Hi. I’m Marc. I’m 27, and I live somewhere on this great island. I have no friends here, however, so I’m looking to remedy that. I’m more of an introverted kind of person, bit of a recluse actually. However, even recluses need co-recluses sometimes :) I am also fairly talkative when I gel well with a person. I’d say I’m fairly fun, and I’m rather caring – sometimes empathy is a curse. I value honesty and clear communication.
Now with clear communication in mind, here are some things I like:

• Natural scenery
• Remote places
• Maps
• Flags
• Worldbuilding
• Storytelling
• Languages
• Computers
• Retro aesthetics
• Cosy aesthetics
• Writing
• Adventure Time!
• Stranger Things!
• Silly fun
• People who can illustrate
• Simplicity
• ...Other random nerdy stuff

I must say I’m not very into anime – at least, not at present -, though I can appreciate the art and music, and I do like some Ghibli films. And for sure I am not into video-games nor football, etc. I honestly don’t fit in well with most people. Life might be easier otherwise, I suppose.
Anywho, that’s just a preview. Send me a chat message if you think we’ll get on well! Do include a brief introduction to yourself. I won’t reply to anything low-effort – but you needn’t write me a gospel account, either.
Ciao for now!
Marc

Honestly, I still don’t get the hate on AI art, but to each their own. It’s sad because I took my own artwork (11 years of art) to create ai model (Lora) to help make things. I bet most people won’t even know how to run these things and only look at the outcome. As artists we have our concerns about AI tech, but does that mean we should not use it.
Wrong, as artists using this tool makes our lives easier, and the expertise we have (in my case 11 years) is not lost. My art friends laugh when we see bland AI generated content, and we are genuinely impressed by good ones. The learning curve is faster to make art now, but understanding how to make art now (aka prompts) is still a skill.
However, my art colleagues all have Anonymous accounts for our AI work because of the hate inside the community. One talked about how he still gets hate messages.
If you are like me and used to have to draw up over 100 drafts of a single scene, then you probably see these tools as “Very helpful”. Most AI art can come off bland and unemotional, but that’s the same for using the same recipe to make a cookie. We add in our own spices to toppings to make a unique cookie that is our own.
Well, soon AI content will be part of everyone’s lives (There is literally no stopping it!). Quick history lesson: America used to have 30% of employment in Agriculture. Tractors took away a lot jobs because it made farming easier. We don’t tractors today.

My whole family has always said awful things about what I choose to wear, my tattoos, and my hair. Recently, I posted a video to facebook where I was clearly excited about the results of my latest appointment and a family member literally sad reacted. I'm so tired of them saying my choices are "ugly" or asking me if I'm ever going to "grow up" as if I'm not a literal manager of a store & pay taxes every year. I'm beyond my mid twenties as well which like. Why do they feel the need to announce their opinions when they could LITERALLY just keep scrolling? This family member is one I haven't seen in almost a year btw so it's an extra sting. Idk why it's getting to me so much, but I really thought we'd come to an understanding that there's no use in commenting on how I choose to present myself because I'm not changing for them. Let me repeat - they ask me when I'm going to grow up and I live on my own, have my own car, have pets, and manage a store. I'm boggled. I just needed to rant some because I'm really really considering blocking that family member from my Facebook and I'm trying to tell the parasites in me that nothing good would come from messaging them "did you mean to react to my post like that?"

I've been a fan since ’99 and still got my big box copy that I took the bus to buy with my paperboy money (and afterwards I got Cataclysm, HW2, Deserts of Kharak, the Remastered Collector’s Edition, the first and second print of the artbook, and now the HW3 Collector’s Edition). I used to frequent Relic News back in the day, Homeworld 1 is my top 5 of all time and I now work in research on games thanks to games like Homeworld leaving a big impact on me. Homeworld also turned me into a huge fan of 70s scifi like Chris Foss and Peter Elson and I regularly listen to all of Paul Ruskay's work. So to say that Homeworld has had an impact on my life is an understatement.
I get that Homeworld 3 isn’t perfect. I get that the cutscenes are very dissonant and doesn’t really explain things. I get that the campaign is short and over way too soon. I also get that there are some gameplay shortcomings and that there seem to be a lack of fleet diversity, but those can be fixed with the post-launch support.
But Homeworld 3 still feels like a Homeworld game and to me, it is at the very least *a good or decent* Homeworld experience. The space vistas are mind-blowingly gorgeous. the megaliths are straight out of concept art from HW2 we saw back in 2002. The ship designs are perfect transitions from the previous Homeworld games. Paul Ruskay’s music is once again a complete banger that feels unique and distinct, but still very much in family with his previous work. How he manages to do this for over 20 years is so incredible. Even though the cutscenes are nonsensical character drama, some of the imagery is pretty neat. The pilot chatter is the best in the series. The battle information that Fleet Command relays to you is also the best in the series in not just providing atmosphere, but also giving you a good overview of the state of your fleet when things can get hectic. They got formations back, they also got a “dock damaged ships” command that makes micromanaging much easier. The mission design in the campaign can be kinda cool and change things up in between missions (I only wish there was more or that the campaign was longer). There's a reason most critics scored it an 8/10, because there's still undoubtedly good stuff in the game.
As someone who really thought we would never ever get a new Homeworld for over a decade, Homeworld 3 as a project is a dream come true in the sense that Rob Cunningham, Aaron Kambietz, Paul Ruskay, Dave Cheong, Martin Cirulis, and a lot of incredibly talented new folks as well came together to make Deserts of Kharak and Homeworld 3. As a game experience, Homeworld 3 is at least right now a decent but especially an incredibly beautiful addition to the series and with the post-launch support, I’m sure some of the kinks will be fixed as already detailed in last week’s comprehensive dev update. I do wish BBI and Gearbox would do something about salvaging the story/campaign, but I don’t have high hopes. The point is that I get the doom and gloom, but I think it's also important to acknowledge and recognize the very positive parts about the game. BBI has spent 5 years working their asses off on this game and they care deeply about the universe and us fans. It’s not over yet and we can see what’ll happen in the future, so I think it’s important to keep in mind the good things and the good intentions by BBI with the huge effort they’ve made.
You have to understand, it’s such a dream come true to have old Homeworld people back together in a new company constellation to make a new space Homeworld. That it stumbled at the finishing line doesn’t detract from the fact that we’ve gotten some great things as Homeworld fans: re-releases of the originals, a GOG release of Cataclysm/Emergence, a hefty and nice artbook, a very well-made prequel by BBI that kickstarted things today, and then of course much more Homeworld with the mobile game, the VR game, the boardgame, and the tabletop RPG and vinyl releases. It’s been a great time to be a Homeworld fan thanks to BBI and Gearbox and I think we can still be positive about the future considering how much BBI and folks at Gearbox genuinely care about the series and likely will work hard to rectify or maybe even surprise us with something else.

Background & Context:

Throwaway account. This isn’t an immediate issue, or even an issue anymore. This relationship issue happened when I was 18. Now I’ve been in a loving relationship with my current girlfriend (we’ll call Mia) for 3 years (I love her to bits, I can’t understate that). This topic came up when I was talking to a group of people about our relationship history. I talked about my first relationship as nowadays I find it to be a funny story. Everyone laughs when I tell it, but they usually come to the conclusion that she was a raging A-hole and gaslit me, even though to this day, I think we’re both at MASSIVE faults for our behaviour. My closest friends have even nicknamed her ‘the devil’. It feels weird to me that despite feeling like I was also an A-hole, but everyone around me thinks otherwise. I was telling my girlfriend about this and she’s like, ‘you know what, you should post this on reddit, it’d be really funny to see the responses!’ Few days later here we are. Now that I’ve gotten context out of the way, Imma just start telling the story.

PART 1 - This is Where I Feel I Was Asshole:

Before The Break-Up:

After some time in the relationship, (I think 2-3 months in, not entirely sure), I felt absolutely awful. Not because she (we’ll call her Emily) was a bad person, not at all. 3 months-ish into the relationship, there were entire days were I would ball my eyes out, or feel completely sick, not able to really do anything apart from contemplate the state of the relationship, mostly because I felt like I was putting in a lot of effort, and she wasn’t putting in effort at all. I think around 3 months in, I ‘talked’ about how I thought ‘the relationship felt like a friendship’. I wasn’t completely open with how much it was affecting me at all (which was an issue on my end), however she kindly set her boundaries, saying how she thought the relationship was fine. She wasn’t mean or anything (maybe AT WORST), slightly dismissive. It was a very civil conversation. I did leave that conversation feeling better, but I also left that conversation thinking I was asking for way too much out of the relationship, and that relationships aren’t really how I thought they’d be. Regardless we move on.
Later on into our relationship, we go on one of our dates, and I remember it being one of the most draining outings I’ve ever had. On my end, and her end as well. I was drained because she was having a bad day before our date, and was frankly being rude to me when it wasn’t really justified. On her end, there were times when I being an idiot and frankly embarrassing, which looking back on it, WAS DEFINITELY TRUE. I remember we were making a joke on the train, and I got to into it and loudly said ‘GANG SH*T’, and then immediately regretted it because 2 or 3 old ladies looked at me, and Emily looked absolutely awe-struck with embarrassment. (Spoiler: A lack of self-awareness in certain moments plays a crucial role later in this post. I read my friend this story, and she said to me, please state that you are also autistic as I feel it also plays a crucial role in this story. I don’t know if that helps but that’s what she says I should say, so yeah). During the end of this date, when we’re both clearly kinda beat up, she brings up the point ‘Does this relationship still feel like a friendship to you?’. We had a civil conversation about it, got some pizza at a pizza place, and left the date on a rather sour note.

Break-Up:

Okay, let’s fast forward to the time when I ask her ‘Can we talk at ‘x’ location?’ This was after the semester in the summer. I wasn’t completely dead-set on ending the relationship, but I was pretty sure within this conversation, it was probably going to happen. She agreed, but later on the day, she texted me that she’d rather talk on the phone (later on within that conversation she jokingly said, ‘I’m not gonna lie, I’m not going to get all dressed up to get broken up with man’, which got a good laugh out of both of us’). We talked on the phone about the relationship and our issues with it, and at the time I thought ‘Yo, this is like the best break-up ever!’. There was very clearly no sort of strong dislike or hate between us despite our moments. We even started jokingly roasting each other during the conversation, laughing our assess of. Hell, she even said that she’ll invite me to her 19th birthday party at the end of the conversation. We even said to each other ‘let’s not tell our school friends that we’ve broken up, and then act like the most platonic homies ever in front of them!’ We both left that call feeling good about ourselves. I told my friends (who didn’t go into the school about the interaction), and they were happy. One of them even said ‘you delayed what could’ve possibly been one of the most calmest break-ups ever’. I texted her about what her friends said, and she said that she was going to tell them in the evening. I didn’t hear back from her about her friends, but didn’t really think anything of it. We very much occasionally texted sometimes in the summer. Sometimes about working out, sometimes about music…don’t really remember much of it, but it was calm (or at least I thought it was calm).
(As I type out this paragraph right now, I indefinitely cringe. The lack of self-awareness from me in this story is…a lot to say the least).

After The Break-Up (Back To School):

I go back to school to see Emily and my friend studying on a table. I see Emily and get slightly nervous, I haven’t seen her face to face for months on end, but I go up to her and my friend, and dap them both up. We have our conversations, go to class, and go home. It did feel VERY awkward being around her, and I did sense that something was wrong, but I chalked it up to, ‘Oh, you’ve just met your ex after months on end, it’s going to be slightly awkward’.
I saw my other friend (we’ll call Daisy), the next day, and she had broken up with her girlfriend. I asked her how the break up went, and she said the break-up went decently. She then asked me about my relationship break up. My brain goes ‘hold on, my ex told you about it?’. Additionally, she asked me that in the most sad way possible. I immediately knew that something was off. I ask her, ‘Yo what did she tell you?’. I’m going to give a very approximate re-enactment about how the convo went.
Daisy: She’s really hurt, from what I said
Me: What did I say?
Daisy: She said that she felt really hurt, the fact that you called her disgusting-
MY EYES WIDEN. I was like WHAT?!? ‘NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO’, THAT’S NOT WHAT I MEANT. OH MY GOD, I FEEL AWFUL…NOOOOOOOOOOO’
Daisy looked at me like she expecting my reaction, like completely unphased. She said to me that she told Emily:
Daisy: ‘You should probably talk to him, because that’s definitely not what he meant.’
Emily: ‘No, I’m tired of explaining myself to people’
I remember the feeling to this day, I felt absolutely awful in the moment. I’ve genuinely never felt worse about hurting a person in my life. I asked Daisy whether I should talk to Emily about the situation and apologise to her, but Daisy said that Emily really doesn’t wanna talk to me again, and that the damage has already been done. Maybe you can apologise in the future, but to give her some time. After school, I go home from this incident, still feeling like shit, and call my friend to tell her about my mistake. We’ll call this friend Steph. Steph listens to me, and doesn’t look amused. She says to me….
Steph: I don’t believe you called her disgusting
Me: What do you mean?
Steph: What did you say to her?
Me: I said to her that during the relationship there were times that I felt sick and couldn’t do anything in the day, as well as struggling with attraction (VERY BRIEFLY, LIKE A FEW SECONDS). Also during the break up, fast forwarding when we were both in a jokey mood, my ex said to me:
‘Why did you DM me a few days before this break-up calling me babe?’ ‘Like you knew this moment was coming hahaha’
Me: ‘Girl, when I did that I was absolutely DISGUSTED’
She laughs and we continue talking to each other making jokes and releasing some tension.
Steph says to me: So, you didn’t flat out say to her face, that she was disgusting…in a serious or jokey tone?
Me: I mean, what I said, can CLEARLY be interpreted as such man. Even though I didn’t flat out say it, I shouldn’t have said any of that, whether it was in a jokey or serious tone. And looking back on that, it’s stupid that I didn’t take that break-up as seriously as it should’ve have. Like…come on, I’m an idiot for roasting and joking around in a moment that should be taken seriously.
Steph: But she was joking around too right?
Me: yeah…
Steph: And she was roasting you too…right?
Me: yeah…
Steph: So why is she mad? That doesn’t make any sense.
Me: I mean, I don’t remember, but knowing me, I probably initiated the jokes.
Steph: Bro, don’t assume. And even if you did initiate the jokes, she would’ve had to play along as well. And the fact that she just assumed that what you said, meant that you found her disgusting, and didn’t find her physically attractive, without talking to you about that…DOESN’T MAKE SENSE.
Me: I don’t know…I still feel like I shouldn’t have done any of that
Steph: Bro, don’t PURELY blame yourself. Hell EVEN HER FRIEND TOLD HER, THAT’S NOT WHAT YOU MEANT! AND SHE DECIDED TO RUN OFF WITH HER ASSUMPTION ANYWAY!
As you can see, my friend was pissed on my behalf. She didn’t really convince me, I still felt awful for a LONG TIME. Okay let’s keep going with this story, it’s a long one

Birthday & ‘The Talk’

My ex and I, have the same birthday. Shocking I know. We were both in school, I didn’t see my ex for the entire day, but even if I did, her friend told me that she really didn’t wanna talk to me, so it’s not like I would talk to her in the first place.
When I went to get lunch, I saw Daisy and Emily were sitting at the table having lunch. I saw my ex, and I made sure not to make eye-contact and walked past them. I thought in my head, she probably wants to enjoy her birthday, and probably doesn’t want to see her ex who called her disgusting on her birthday. A day later, I talk to Daisy, and the topic of Emily comes up. Daisy said to me that Emily was looking for me on our birthday, to also wish me happy birthday, and got upset that when she finally saw me, I walked past her and ignored her. AGAIN, I FEEL AWFUL, but in the back of my head, I’m just like ‘wait, I swear she said she doesn’t wanna talk to me’. I inquire Daisy on this. (Unfortunately, since it’s been years now, I don’t remember what Daisy said). So bing-bang-boom, later on in the day, Daisy, my ex, Emily and my old friend group meet up. Emily smiles at me, but also looks emotionally beat-up. Bro, when I saw I almost teared up, and was like ‘not today, not today, not today’. After some small talk within the group, I ask Emily to talk privately with her. She was amicable and agreed to go to talk privately.
The first thing I did was apologise, and says that’s not what I meant at all, and clarified my feelings. I don’t remember exactly what I said, but I said the comment about me being disgusted about my Instagram DM was meant playfully, to criticise my own behaviour. Additionally, when I said I was struggling with attraction and felt sick during the relationship, it wasn’t because of how you look. It was because of the nature of the relationship, and how I felt like I was putting inn way too much effort (within that conversation, I was trying to omit the fact that I felt like she put in no effort at all. I felt weird putting blame on her for that in the time) I even admitted within the break-up conversation, that I still felt attraction to her, but I know the relationship wasn’t working, as so did she. She said:
‘Well, I’m not going to ask for clarification, like oh maybe he didn’t mean this, when someone says something as blatant as that’
We talk some more. Emily said that she didn’t want to be friends because she was VERY hurt about what I said, but if we ever see each other, that we can be civil. She gives a lot of points about the break-up. I remember in my head disagreeing with the points, but unfortunately while I’m writing this post, I don’t remember those points. The conversation that we had was very civil and respectful. I remember that I disagreed with the points that she put forward, but I didn’t give any push-back. I was there to take responsibility for my stupidity and negligence, and apologise. Daisy told Emily what I said about just being there to apologise, and emily got annoyed saying ‘Why is he trying to act like my therapist?’ to her. Daisy told me she said this…I was confused but decided to leave it there, and not talk to Emily again, and reflect on how I communicate with people,, because I didn’t want to hurt anyone like that again.

Conclusion

Okay, everything I’ve said here, to this day, I still believe that I’m a MASSIVE ass-hole. The way I talked to her whether jokingly or not within that conversation was unacceptable. I should’ve kept it serious, no roasting, and not to give jokes at the expense of the other WHATSOEVER within a context as a big as that. Due to that, I hurt someone that I really cared about. Agree with me or not, that’s how I feel to this day. The experience has helped me for the better as it did help me change my behaviour in terms of how I communicate, and be more conscious of what I say. It’s carried on YEARS later, and whilst I slip up and may occasionally hurt someone’s feelings or say something out of pocket, it can easily be solved with a ‘hey, please don’t say that’, and nowhere near as bad as someone who is supposed attracted to you, feeling DISGUSTING. From here, this is where she does some things that dictate her as a massive asshole.

PART 2- This is Where I Feel SHE Was An Asshole:

Making Up

3-4 weeks go by , she seems a lot more chirpy and happy when I occasionally see her in school. One day she taps me on the shoulder, and says ‘Hey, I’ve thought about our conversation, and I think I’m over everything[…]I’d appreciate it if we can be cool again, if you would like, and we can hang out in the same circles. I light up and I say ‘yeah, that’d be nice’. Being in the same friend-circle with her was nice. We didn’t talk face-to-face often, but everything was friendly and cool.

Water-Incident:

3 days later. Somebody in our group spills water onto the ground in the cafeteria. I try to clean it. Emily and my other friend (we’ll call Marco) go to get some cleaning roll. She comes back giving me a death-stare. I was startled, but for some reason thought nothing of it. I thought it might’ve been how I was cleaning the water, as she’s very big on cleaning. She says ‘WHY CAN’T YOU GUYS CLEAN?’ Marco makes a joke along the lines saying ‘Men don’t know how to clean’ or something like that. She laughs, and I start thinking that ‘oh this is a bit’. As we’re cleaning the water off the ground, and then let the water soak into the tissue, she goes away from the water, and starts ranting to her friend. My friend and I start laughing, as we think it’s a bit. She storms out and says ‘it’s not funny’. Instantly I froze. I went over to her friend (we’ll call him Kyle. BTW Fck Kyle. He was a terrible person that sexually harasses women, despites them saying that they’re uncomfortable. I didn’t know about that during the time of this story, but I knew that later on during that year. Kyle, I if you’re reading this, I hope you’ve changed your ways, if not, fck you, sincerely). I went over to Kyle’s table and asked, ‘Yo is Emily okay?’
Kyle: It’s not my place to say what happened
Me: slightly panick Bro, I just wanna know if she’s okay
Kyle: okay…YOU AND EMILY GOT SOME ISSUES! AND YOU GOT SOME STUFF TO FIGURE OUT!
She shouted at me in front of the cafeteria, with multiple tables looking at me, some people laughing, and some people looking sorry for me.
Kyle walks away, and I just stand there for 5-10 seconds, give a large exhale, put my palms in to my hand, and walk back to the group. When Emily comes back, I ask her if she’s okay. She said something alone the lines of ‘Don’t make fun of someone, and then ask them if they’re okay straight afterwards…’. (She wasn’t mad at Marco for some reason, but was mad at me, but as Daisy said ‘I knew how her anxiety worked’.) I walk away from the group, and go outside and just look up at the sky. I thought that I had fucked up again, and not able to realise when I’ve crossed a line. I distanced myself from the group, and just stayed alone from a bit and studied for the upcoming exams. I was studying for around 14 hours a day, and when I wasn’t studying, I was thinking that I was a terrible person. It was probably that, and the combination of exam-stress that lead to me getting my first panic-attack when hanging out with my friends. When Emily came up to my group of friends with someone else, I left the group, and just wanted to be in my own space.

Getting jealous of multiple girls I was talking to and proceeds to stare them down:

I was talking to other girls in a group. Not in a romantic way. I was NOT in the space for another relationship, especially when I don’t know when I’ve crossed a line. I didn’t want to hurt anyone the same way I hurt Emily. There was a girl (we’ll call her Lacey) and another girl (we’ll call her Selena) that I got on pretty well with. We’ve been talking for a few months at this point. I was talking to them during my lunch-time, and I told her the story about my ex and I. She said to me ‘Is your ex the girl that’s been death-staring me?’
Me: Wait what?
Lacey: Yeah, whenever I talk to you should just death-stares me for ages. It’s made me so uncomfortable, I’ve wanted to get up from my seat and say ‘excuse me, do we have a problem?’
This battle between them apparently lasted for the ENTIRE YEAR until they never saw each other again.
Selena has talked to her and said to me ‘Yeah…I’m not going to lie, I don’t like her, you can do better’
I was like ‘guys, relax’
Them: My bad, my bad.
Selena: But, there’s better out there.
I was also notified by another woman that my ex death-stared them and made them uncomfortable because of it. That was really weird to me, but hey I wasn’t talking to her anymore, and I just minded my business. I haven’t talked to her since that ‘water incident’.

Make-Up No.2

Emily hits me up on Instagram, wanting to call. We have a chat about the current state of affairs, and both admitted that we had feelings for each other to summarise. She admitted that she was jealous seeing me hang out with other girls, and that she got mad at me again within the 3 days that we made up, and said ‘my bad about that’. We further clarified some stuff about the relationship, and we made up. I think a few days later - FOR SOME UNGODLY REASON, I DO NOT REMEMBER WHY, MY FRIENDS TO THIS DAY MAKE FUN OF ME FOR THIS - I asked her out. Maybe, it was the feeling of wanted to being rejected to fully get over her, I don’t know man. I was in a bad space. My friend as I’m reading her this draft, has now gotten on her knees, and started praying for my sanity. Emily rejected me, and to be honest the day after, I thanked god that we didn’t get back together.

‘Exploding at me’

We were hanging out in a group. I was being relatively quiet, and had learnt to shut up and think before I speak quite consistently until this point. I looked at Emily and she looked upset. I looked at her and was about to ask whether she was okay. From my glance alone, she exclaims at me: ‘If you ask me if I’m okay, I will shout/snap at you, just saying’. I put my hands up completely startled. I was thinking maybe she hates me asking if she’s okay. It had become a meme in the friend-group that I over ask people whether they’re okay if I think they look sad, so maybe I was annoying her.
Now, she later apologised a few days later saying Kyle had sexually harassed her, and she was really tense within that moment, and just exploded. NOW, people who were there said I was unfairly treated, however, something that’s as serious and harmful as that happening to someone, I understand blowing up at someone. So we moved on. As I said before, f*ck Kyle.

I WASN’T fully sure why she didn’t like me in this moment:

I saw Emily sad during the day, seeming sort of upset. I message her on Instagram during that evening ‘Hey, I know it’s a bit of a meme of me asking people if they’re okay, but you looked upset today and I wanted to know if everything was good?’. She laughs and says ‘everything is good’
I literally walked up to the group the next day, try to fist-bump everyone, and when I put my fist towards her, she ignored me. I thought she didn’t see me, so I stupidly fist-bumped everyone again and went towards her. This moment is comedic gold. She winces at me, and disapprovingly waves. My friend Marco says ‘Ooooooooo’, I’m like ‘woah’ and completely freeze, with my fist still in the air. Daisy tries to break the awkward silence and says ‘it’s just one of those days’. I’m completely frozen with my fist, still in the air during all of this happening, in complete awe, thinking to myself ‘what did I do this time?’. Daisy, to release me from this state, proceeds to rapidly first bump me 10 times. Once I register what’s fully happened, I leave the group and sit with my friends. I heard her from the other end of the cafeteria complaining about me to her friends. After that scenario, I didn’t talk to her one-to-one for the rest of the year, and tried to avoid talking to her. I accepted after that moment that no matter how I act, I’m going to be met with a negative reaction.
Later on after school had ended, I found out that she was upset because she thought I was dating my CURRENT girlfriend. Now to be brief, I met this girl in the beginning of the year. I remember we started talking very frequently as she was cool, but I wasn’t ready for a relationship whatsoever. She said really liked me, and in her words jokingly says that ‘she just waited patiently’. We went out for a couple of times, but these weren’t clarified to be dates (EVENTHOUGH nowadays we basically call them dates), and she admitted she liked me. I said that she was lovely, but that I wasn’t mature enough for a relationship, and that ‘you probably don’t want to date me’. I did start slowly developing feelings for her. All of this date stuff happened after being rejected from my ex. Now we weren’t dating at the time, and were strictly on friend terms. I guess it might’ve been obvious that we both liked each other, considering that Emily got upset and didn’t talk to me. Near the end of the year, we started dating, and as I’ve said before, we’re still dating to this day. Marco called it out that we liked each once we started dating, and we were like ‘welp, I guess the secret’s out lol’. Yeah that’s about it there.

A year later, Emily texts me when I’m studying my university degree, telling me I’m a dickhead, even though I blocked her:

I’m on facetime with my girlfriend. I believe we’re a year and a bit into our relationship, and then my ex texts me. Keep in mind, I’ve blocked my girlfriend on all platforms, and deleted her number. I should’ve blocked her number, because she decides text me, saying something along the lines of:
‘Hey it’s Emily here. Just wanna say you’re a dickhead for leading me on for 3 months, and telling me that you liked me when you didn’t. Thanks for adding to my trauma and my trust issues with people. Hope you and your current girlfriend are doing okay!’
Me: w-what? I’m so confused.
Seconds after, I then decide not to give a second thought, and then I blocked her.
Conclusion:
This was a long-story, but here’s my proper conclusion. I think I was an asshole for how I broke up with her as said in Part 1. I also think I was flat-out stupid for agreeing to be friends with her, despite her clearly resenting me. I think she’s the asshole for treating me horribly after the break-up, making some of my female friends feel uncomfortable by staring at them, getting mad at me multiple times without telling me she was properly mad, and then sending me an awful text, even when I’ve blocked her on all platforms.
Okay long story done. Discuss y'all.

Today I cried for 15 minutes in the work restroom because I couldn't tell a colleague whether our colleague had ordered something. Said colleague was out of office. I have no way of checking if she called the supplier. I don't even have a list of our suppliers and I can't guess who it was based on Google. She threatened to report me to my manager. I just snapped as I was already under so much pressure.
I usually don't bring work home emotionally but I'm really struggling. My mental health has taken a nose dive in the last month due to work. I was already overworked prior but now a colleague left abruptly and I've been given her role as well as my old role. No extra pay either. I'm expected to keep on top of the work of 2 people. I just can't and people are getting mad. I consistently have 100 unread emails no matter how hard I try to action them. As soon as I answer 5, 8 more come in. I also manage the site helpdesk for our 2000 employees. I get 60+ complaints/ request everyday day and have to assign site engineers/plumbers or contractors to move tables or stick up signs or fix blocked toilets, you name it. I'm working several hours unpaid each week and I'm still behind. I'm trying my hardest to get out and have vocalised it is impossible to do the work of 2 people several times- if they want things done efficiently in a timely manner, i need help. I've already done 2 interviews this week for other departments in the company. I'm a freaking temp. I want job security and a clear job description.How does one become less sensitive to work stress?

I had this realization in the last 15 minutes of therapy yesterday and figured this was a good a place as any to get more off my chest.
I (33F) have been married to my husband (37M) for 6 years, together for 12. I've always had a great relationship with his family, his parents welcomed me with open arms from day one. They're the nicest people and really low maintenance in-laws for the most part. However, his mom is just... so much. She raised two sons who are just like their dad (introverted, bookish, lowkey, atheist) whereas she's an extremely extroverted, social, liberal catholic. I'd describe her as giving off "kooky aunt" vibes, or that girl on tiktok who impersonates her wacky boomer mom who can't break bad news in a normal way. And she's obsessed with me.
As you can probably imagine, she's really, really, REALLY into the concept of "finally" having a daughter. And normally I'd be happy to play the part, but I also have a mother I am very close (read: enmeshed) with and don't have the energy to muster a second similar relationship with. We have plenty in common like baking, yoga, and reading, but she just wants more from me than I can give her and her behaviors make it hard to want to try harder.
Some examples for context:

• Despite being one of the chattiest people I know, she's extremely hard to converse with. She jumps from topic to topic, speaks before thinking, asks well-meaning but intrusive questions, and I feel like I can't confide in her for all those reasons despite her being so nice and positive almost always. Every time I text her to say hi or send a cute photo of the pets she responds (days later, mind you) with a million questions about my life/work/hobbies that I end up not replying most of the time.
• Diet culture is just so ingrained in her psyche. She's never been fat in her life and I'm not a thin person, and she uses body image and diet as a way to relate to me in a way that feels extremely icky despite her language being broadly positive. She uses "you look like you've lost weight" as a compliment and is on some kind of new dietary kick every other week. I'll never forget her telling me "it doesn't look like you gained any weight" when picking us up from the airport after our honeymoon in Italy. Or when she ordered a massive plate of spaghetti at lunch, ate five bites, then declared "we'll just make a big salad for dinner." She was staying at our house so I'm not sure where said big salad was supposed to come from.
• My main hobby is horseback riding, which is one of those things that gets a lot of questions/interest from non-horsey people. I'll talk about my horse all day every day, but MIL is just OBSESSED with the concept. If I had a dollar for every time she told me "I want to come watch you ride" I would be able to buy myself a very nice meal. It's not like it's a closed practice at all, it's just the constant demand to be involved that rubs me the wrong way. And the fact that she's actually terrified of horses. Husband did tell her to stop asking after the most recent visit but I got the sense it hurt her feelings a bit.
• MIL and FIL came to visit for the day last weekend (we live in cities about 2 hours apart) and they rolled up in a massive tizzy because their tire pressure light was on. They wanted to be towed to a shop but I ended up checking their tire pressure (god knows they didn't know how to) and all four wheels were good to go, they just hadn't cleared the indicator after getting their car serviced. I made the mistake of wearing a sleeveless shirt that day and as I was walking around their car MIL followed me going "ooooh let me see your tattoos!!!" and I wanted to disappear.

All of these things are obviously nowhere near the nightmare JUSTNO stories I've read on this sub, but my MIL just exhausts me. She makes me feel like I'm some kind of novelty. And I feel like a garbage human because she's just SO NICE and I can't give her what she wants. I wish I could. She means well and is a good person, but I'm not her daughter or her bestie. I'm her son's wife and I love her, but I just don't like her that much.
If you made it this far, thank you for reading and I hope some of y'all can relate or at least find amusement in the champagne problems of having a MIL. <3

Hey everyone! Sorry for the long wait, the story is not abandoned, I just got a bit lost in other stuff and have fallen out with the world of NoP a bit. I will continue the story, through I can't promise a new chapter every month.
On another note, I am quite proud of this chapter, this is definetly my favourite one, and I enjoyed expanding on Velnils past and mental health. (And tormenting him, of course. Nah, just joking. xD)
Thank you for creating this beautiful universe!
Also thanks to for proofreading!
Criticism is very much welcome, let me know what you think!
Enjoy!
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Memory transcription subject: Velnil, Arxur deserter Date [standardized human time]: 25th of October, 2136, Middle of the night
CW: panic attack, hallucination, self harm
[Note: Dream state detected. Reliving memory. Proceed? (Y/N)]
[Y]
The cold seeped deep into Velnil’s scales as he trudged up the hidden path of the forest, up onto a small hill where a single, just barely alive tree stood still. There was no wind, no new smells and no sound. It was calm, eerily calm, forcing Velnil to periodically stop and look around, seeing if anyone had followed him.
Every time, there was nothing. It was just the empty forest, filled with dying trees and withered bushes. There were a few animal bones here and there sticking out of the ground, but he did not care enough to spare a glance at them.
As he ascended higher and higher on the small hill, he felt as his breathing slowly returned to normal from the usually used powerful intakes and blowouts. He took a slow, deep breath, as he arrived at the tree, letting the cold air run into his lungs, and calming down his beating heart. He was here again. The only question was if he was really alone or not.
“Frostbubble, are you there?” He asked, almost in a whisper as he looked around, moving towards the tree. It still felt strange to use this nickname, but if it kept her safe and happy, he was more than glad to use it.
“Aww, you did come, Velny.” The voice was almost sickeningly sweet for Velnil’s ears, but he knew it was because of everything he had been learning. The warmth in his chest was just another proof to it, as he noticed her lanky shadow climb down from the tree, keeping a small bag up with her tail as she did so. He felt a slight blush creep onto his face as she hopped down, and quickly approached him.
“How have you been? I hope they didn’t manage to rough you up too badly this time.” The care in her voice made Velnil shutter and relax at the same time, as her hand landed on his arm, caressing the scar he had first received for insubordination.
He was four back then.
“No. I’m okay, Zar… Frostbubble.” More warmth filled his chest at her wide toothed smile. “They didn’t get me this time. I managed to trick them.”
“So clever and cunning, Velny.” Her grating chuckle, while repulsive to his ears, was music to his heart. He felt a soft pressure on his hand as she took it, and began leading him to the other side of the tree, facing away from the facility, and out towards the dying wilderness. The view has always filled him with dread, seeing as nature had slowly withered away with his feelings, only to eventually be replaced by even more factories and facilities. It was truly as if the planet felt his pain, his suffering as he was slowly broken down, only to be replaced by the ideals and will of Betterment.
They sat down on the ground, neither of them caring about the cold, as they leaned back a bit, looking up at the night sky. Everything was so calm, yet Velnil couldn’t keep himself from looking around, listening for any noise that could tell him they were not alone.His anxiety only grew, until he felt a soft touch on his chin. He let his head be turned back towards her.
Her smile was horrible(line through) beautiful. The shine of her eyes as she looked at him so calmly, like they weren’t in constant danger of being found out and killed. It angered him, but at the same time, it filled him with a strange feeling. It was still so alien to him, he never felt it before, only when he was with her.
“We are safe here, Veln. Don’t worry so much about it. I am always watching and also making sure that no one is following you. You don’t need to turn around that often. Let yourself relax a bit.” It didn’t make any sense. How could he relax? They were out and about without the knowledge of the masters, they were going against the rules.
She is not even supposed to be here. She was never in the facility.
He opened his mouth, but couldn’t say anything as she closed it, playfully flicking one of her claws on his snout. He shook his head, incredulous about what just happened.
“I know that look, Velny. Relax, just for this once.” As she leaned forward, his heart rate spiked, the alien feeling shooting up like fire as warmth filled his face at the feeling of her nuzzling his snout. He leaned towards her, eyes half-lidded as he felt his muscles relax ever so slightly. Perhaps Zartha is right. He could relax with her, and not be on the lookout for any danger that may be around them.
“Maybe… maybe you are right, Frostbubble.” He mumbled, his eyes closing momentarily as his snout moved to rub at her throat, with a sharp intake of air coming from her.
“Veln, I…” Zartha stopped for a few seconds, prompting Velnil to lean back a bit to look at her. She looked… troubled? Unsure? No, it was something else. Her eyes fluttered while looking all around, as if searching for danger, but they always returned to him, at which point she flicked with her tailtip, until it snagged at her satchel.
“I made something for you.” Velnil cocked his head as he watched her pull out a thermos, quickly unscrewing its top. He watched as steam rose from the thermos, filling the air with a sweet scent, creating an even more serene atmosphere.
“It’s Trilltilla tea. It took a long time, but I wanted to make it for you.” Velnil watched as she presented the top part of the thermos for him. Slowly reaching out, he took hold of it, their hands touching as their eyes met. The shining in her eyes, the way her irises grew, her tail that wagged more and more. He was sure she felt the same strange feeling he felt, as his tail wagged as well, albeit slowly.
He then took hold of it properly, lifting it up to drink. There was no need to say thanks. She knew he was thankful for it.
“So, this is where you have been sneaking off.” Velnil jumped up and whipped around, the top of the thermos falling to the ground as its contents spilled. Next to the tree stood his master, with two burly arxur standing on either of his side. The scowl on his master's face told him everything. They saw everything, the two of them have been found out.
It was over for them.
Zartha slowly stood up, to which one of the arxur moves so quickly to her, it was almost a blur. A painful yelp came from her as she was punched in the gut, tumbling forward, but she wasn’t allowed to fall to the ground. The arxur kept her up, while his master and the other moved in.
“So, you must be Zartha. I have heard quite a lot of you. A disgrace to our kind, really.” His master’s voice was full of contempt. Velnil didn’t dare to speak, nor did he dare to move, lest he might lose his head.
Or worse…
“I’m no disgrace. The only disgrace here is how you trea-” She wasn’t allowed to finish. Master didn’t allow her. The arxur holding her punched her again, forcing the air out of her lungs.
“Tssk. Such a waste of resources. This one is unfixable.” As his master’s eyes landed on him, Velnil felt himself freeze under the glare. “But you will still be redeemed, boy. Oh, you will be. I will make sure of that. You are allowed to return to your dwelling, at this instant.” His heart didn’t want to, but his mind knew he must move. Velnil’s legs, almost like he was on auto-pilot, moved, one after the other, as he began making his way down. He heard as his master turned to address the other arxur.
“Find its father and wipe its disgrace off this world. Then find its mother, and make sure that woman brings a proper arxur into this world.” An acknowledging grunt was the only answer.
The cold seeped deep into Velnil’s scales as he made his way down the hill, the warmth escaping, leaving him with a cold, painful pressure on his rumbling stomach that yearned for her tea.
But it will never feel its warmth.
~~~
Growling, and pressure on his stomach was what woke Velnil up. On instinct, he striked with his right arm, his sharp claws swiping at nothing. His head swiveled around, with no need for his eyes to adjust to the darkness of the night, trying to find whatever was threatening him.
There was nothing.
Velnil began to work on calming his breathing as he tried to listen, focusing on the nightly sounds of the forest, seeing if he can hear the soft running of paws, or the strong thumps of human legs.
Again, there was nothing.
With a grumble, he rolled onto all fours, sniffing around and looking for any clues on what might have growled and pawed at him.
The sound repeated itself, this time however, Velnil felt the painful clamps of his stomach as it rumbled loudly, seemingly discontent with the lack of food inside of it. With the realization that he is just hungry - very much so -, Velnil got into a bipedal stance, and began making his way towards the farm.
Looking around as much as he could see of the sky, it must have still been well into the night. He could have just checked it on his holopad, but then his eyes would have to adjust to the dark again, and he would possibly give away his location - after all, he could never know if something or someone was watching him.
The night was annoyingly cold, but it was nothing like what he had to survive during his training. It molded him, made him stronger, able to ignore the cold seeping into his bones and keep on going.
He always had to keep going.
He promised it.
Velnil didn’t know how long he was walking when another rumble left his stomach, this time however, his mouth began to water at the enticing smell his nostrils had caught. It was a familiar smell, divine even, and the bigger breath he took, the more it filled his being, as the picture practically smashed itself into his mind.
Krakotl.
Yumm.
Dropping onto all fours, he made his way towards the source of the smell, taking great care to avoid stepping on a branch, or making any noise that might give away his position. He froze, and silently cursed himself at another rumble of his stomach. Do you want to be filled or not?! If so, be silent!
His stomach did not respond. Good.
Continuing to stalk forward, the smell started to become stronger as the wind carried it to him. Reaching another, much smaller clearing, he hid inside one particularly big bush, easily seeing out of it.
There, in the gentle moonlight kneeled a young, healthy looking krakotl. Its feathers reflected the moonlight beautifully, and he could make out some kind of red pattern on the otherwise greenish plumage that covered it. From scent alone he could tell that it was a female, possibly the same age, or maybe older than he was.
It was just the right age. He could feel himself salivating as he watched it do something, it had its back to him, he could jump out and just get it!
His muscles tensed as he prepared himself, but a sudden thought of realization of where he was exactly forced him to stop, tensing up even more as to not jump. Just then, the krakotl leaned back up, revealing what it had been doing.
Velnil felt himself recoil a bit at the sight of the familiar flower. How did the krakotl get it here?! Who even allowed it to plant that? Why…?
The slits of his eyes slowly rounded out as he watched the light of the moon shine onto the flower, prompting it to slowly unfurl, revealing five sickly green colored petals, with a bright blue colored inside. Velnil felt himself lowering onto the ground, his eyes becoming blurry - but why?
Reaching up, he felt something wet in his eye - tears. He was… crying? Why was he…
It is what she used to make tea for you that day. The memory hit him like a plasma bolt. The flower - Triltilla, or Lover’s poison as some used to call it, was a rare flower from the krakotl turned arxur colony world. Interestingly, the prey was the one that came up with the nickname for the flower - it was said that when the lover made tea from the petals, it’s effect depended on the care that was put into it - the petals had to be cleaned from any pollen, then cured and dried for the right amount of time, which was then followed by making the tea. If the maker of the tea put the proper care to it, it worked as sort of a love potion - it helped with maternity and helped the mates bond.
But if even the slightest mistake was made, if the maker wasn’t careful enough, the pollen, or not drying it for the proper amount of time greatly changed its effect - causing severe pain for whoever drank the tea, and in some cases, even death.
It was dumb. Of course it was, it came from a prey infested world that was cleansed by his ancestors!
And yet, that single flower was one of her favorites. He never truly understood why, but of course, how could he.
He was well into his training back then. He saw it as her weakness. One of her oh so many flaws that plagued her ability to live as a proper arxur.
Oh, because you always lived as a proper arxur? Came the sudden response to his thoughts, feeling another pang of pain from his stomach as he once again wiped a tear from his face. He forced back down a slight growl as he looked back up at the prey, his tongue running over his lips as he kneaded the ground beneath his paws. He wanted to to jump out, to strike, to once again taste his favorite food.
Could he really kill through?
A third, this time much louder rumble had escaped his stomach, it seemed this time the prey had heard it.
“Hello?” The prey’s head whipped around, staring at his general direction, as her soft trilling voice rang out. “Is anyone there?” Another question rang out, it sounded so young, and yet, he watched as his prey’s eyes slowly went over her surroundings, forcing Velnil to slightly pull back, and close his eyes until there was only a slight line visible.
As he imagined how it would taste, his tongue running over his lips, the krakotl took a tentative step forward, eyes still scanning the treeline.
“Lia, is that you?” As Velnil finally got over the fight inside his head, his hunger slowly winning, he prepared to pounce, his eyes opening more ever so slightly as his claws dug into the dirt a bit.
“Aw, damn it. How did you know?” Once again, Velnil almost stumbled out of his hiding spot as a sudden voice came from somewhere to his right. He watched as the prey turned their head towards the voice, as Velnil barely held back an angry hiss at the appearance of a female human.
The woman, referred to as ‘Lia’ seemed to be around [180cm] in height, as she made her way over to the krakotl with surprising silence. Light brown hair flowed down her back, tied into a ponytail. Similarly to other humans, she was also wearing fake pelts, with surprisingly light colored blue jeans and light green shirt.
For a second, Velnil wondered how the human does not shiver from the cold, but his mind quickly wound up with another question: how in the twisted wriss does she hunt in such light clothes? What other thing could she do here at a time like this?
“I didn’t. You scared the… Why are you even here?” The krakotl puffed its feathers up as it turned its head to its side to glare at the predator in front of it. Albeit the body language of the prey showed slight alarm and trepidation, its voice was surprisingly calm, maybe even reproachful. The human seemed to also take note of its voice, putting up her hands as she looked at the prey.
“Oh, I’m sorry miss ‘I go for a walk into the forest in the middle of the night’”. At this, the krakotl seemed to deflate, lowering their head a bit, but not for long, as the human stepped up to them, and brought their head back up with what he assumed was a gentle touch. “I just woke up to being cold, and after waiting a bit, and looking and not finding you, I became worried. Besides, what do you expect if my living, breathing blanket suddenly disappears?” The human chuckled, which was soon joined by the prey's own chuckling, extending a wing to strike at the human.
“Oh, hush, you! It’s not my fault your only protection is your strange pelts! Plus, why are you not wearing anything else, aren’t you cold?” A slight worry in its tone was sickening to listen to, as Velnil continued to watch the two interact, until the human female suddenly stopped, snapping their head towards his direction, accommodated by a cracking sound, which was then followed by the woman groaning, and massaging their neck.
“Shit.. That hurt…” She mumbled. Both the prey and Velnil seemed to jump slightly at the sudden movement, albeit for different reasons. As the prey started worrying over the human, Velnil pulled back even more, laying completely flat on the cold ground as his heart beat even faster. Impossible, this is impossible! The wind is coming from their direction, I was as silent as a night stalker, how could she know I’m here?!
His question wasn’t left unanswered, which confused him greatly.
“Are you okay? What was that?” Asked the krakotl for the third time, thankfully silenced by the human.
“Nothing, nothing, I just… I thought someone was looking at me. I could feel whatever it was.” At the answer, the krakotl tilted its head in confusion, clicking its beak a few times in contemplation.
“You… felt something staring at you? But… how? Aren’t you humans… you know?” The meek thing shrunk a bit again, but was quickly calmed by the human, who ran their hand over their back.
“Eh, it’s hard to explain, and it’s quite late. Let’s just say that sometimes we just get this… feeling of being watched. I have to say, it wasn’t the best idea to come out here without a flashlight, now that I think about it. This place gives me the creeps.” The human seemingly shuddered as she looked around, while the prey looked even more confused.
Before it could say anything however, the human sighed, and turned back to the krakotl.
“Anyways, we should probably head back, Suyla. I heard that tomorrow we will have a… not so good surprise. So we should probably, at the very least, get well rested.” At this, the krakotl seemed to realize something, as they huddled closer to the human, looking around with fear.
“Do you think that it’s… here?” It asked, its voice quivering a bit as the human put their hands on its back, trying to calm the prey.
“Well, I saw Rich arrive, so he must be already here somewhere.” At this point Velnil realized they were talking about him, and he held back a growl once again. He watched as the human led his catch away, leaving him with an empty stomach and an even sourer mood.
“NoT sO gOod SuUrPRisE..” Velnil mimicked mockingly, growling to himself after the human and his food left, grabbing and squeezing a handful of earth as he sulked. This is so dumb, as if the humans would be any better! They are weak and pathetic predators! Even he could take on a few of them! Probably.
Yeah, and you would get yourself killed. And prove them right.
Whatever! He thought to himself with a rumble. It’s not like I care about what they think.
Of course you don’t. Otherwise you would have to accept you are a-
Silence! Growled Velnil as he shook his head. For a few moments, he waited for a reply, but when it didn’t arrive, he raised his chin smugly.
He was about to get up to be on his way when he heard some rustling in front of him. Looking up, he noticed something that looked a lot like a sivkit, except it was wrong in almost every aspect, except for its eyes. He watched the animal approach the newly planted flower, and Velnil scoffed as the animal began to sniff at it.
Dumb prey. You don’t even know what that is, and you just approach it. As Velnil watched the animal, his eyes widened, and time seemed to slow down as he saw it open its mouth.
Oh no, you won’t. With a growl, he sprung from his hiding spot, his maw opening wide with razor sharp teeth as he caught the prey just before it could turn and run.
The metallic taste was a welcome sensation.
~~~
Velnil hummed a low tune for himself as he was walking back to his clearing, his hunger somewhat satiated as he let the cold air fill his lungs to their capacity. With his hunger sated for the foreseeable few hours, he could think a bit more clearly about his situation.
This place looked nothing like a farm. At least, not how a cattle farm would look like, but even those places had parts where they grew prey food to feed the cattle.
So if the humans are not going to keep cattle on this farm, apart from the alien one, why grow so much on such a big area? He knew humans can eat prey food, as revolting of a thought it was, they all could just eat more meat. Do they really care that much about the walking and talking prey that they don’t eat meat because of them?
Bah. Of course they care about their cattle. That way they won’t run away.
Though, the more he thought about it, the less sense it made. Do they really not eat the alien cattle that are here? Albeit he only just arrived, the animals didn’t seem to be scared at all. That woman - Lia, was his name, if he remembered correctly - even went out into the cold night to find her feathered ‘friend’.
Growling softly, he shook his head, banishing the line of thought to the back of his mind. He didn’t need to think about this - it was useless when it came to his survival. He knew the humans would do anything to save cattle - even if said cattle bombed them. If it needs to be, he can always take one as a hostage, and on the other hand - he probably could still get at least one of the prey riled up enough to attack him.
That will be spectacular.
But what else could he do? There was one saying he saw on a human website that described his current position quite nicely - He was a wolf among sheep. A wolf in sheep’s clothing. He had to get them to lower their guards, to not view him as a threat, but rather, one of those weak useless arxur who cannot do anything right.
Oh, you have experience in that, don’t worry.
“Shut. Your. Mouth.” He hissed to himself, stopping in his tracks as he looked forward. His arms shook slightly, but he forced his hands into fists to stop it.
What’s the matter, Velnil? Forgot about me so quickly? You hurt my - sorry -, our feelings.
“I said shut up!” Growling filled the air as Velnil leaned forward, the shaking moving to his shoulders.
Why should I? We are no longer in the Dominion. Betterment can’t get a hold of us. We are free.
“We are not free… We will never be.” growled Velnil suddenly turning to swiftly strike at a tree. He winced from the pain shooting through his right hand, but he didn’t care. He didn’t want to feel. He shouldn’t feel anything.
But we are. We ran away, fooled the humans, fooled their prey. We could go where we want. Or stay here. Live a new-
“This is NOT my home!” Velnil yelled. “This will never be. I am not free, just a damned prisoner of another species! I can never be as free as I want to be!”
And what would you call being free? Not like you would know it, of course. I can see it, after all. You know nothing about being free. You are just-
“Shut up! Shutupshutupshutup!” Velnil yelled as he began hitting his head against the tree, each time his body shaking in pain while the tree stood steadfast.
Unmoving.
Uncaring.
Emotionless.
With tears in his eyes, he slunk down against the tree, his breathing fast and uneven. The shadows danced around him, waiting in silence, waiting to pounce on his weak form. The sounds of the night sky became howls of predators, the ground further ahead opened up, the rotten, clawed hand of an arxur suddenly appearing at the edge of it, pulling it’s body up, revealing a set of familiar yellow eyes.
“V-veeeeelniiiilll” Groaned her corpse as she pulled herself up, taking a step closer. His breathing fastened as his eyes were trained not on her head, but her torn open neck.
“No… No… I- I didn’t…” His whines were left unanswered as her corpse took another step towards him, an arm reaching out as one of her eyes fell out, leaving the empty socket as a void to peer into and devour his weak soul.
“I didn’t want to!” He yelled, trying to crawl away, but the tree behind him didn’t let him. “I never wanted to! I-I-I wanted to keep you safe, but I-”
“Veeeeeel-” The corpse sighed out, before taking in a shallow breath - her torn open throat moving along with the action, opening to let air in, before she continued. ”-nyy.” Another step, then as he blinked, she was standing over him. A startled whine left him as he scooted back even more, pressing against the tree as she reached out.
“I’m sorry! I’m so fucking sorry, I wanted to save you, I did!” He screamed hiding away behind his arms as he shouted one last thing: “I loved you!”.
As he shrunk back even more, his breath slowed, his head became woozy as soon his consciousness began to slip away, hearing her speak one last time.
“Veeeeeelnnnyy.”
~~~
Velnil came back to consciousness with a start, head rapidly turning around as his breath hitched, until pain shot through his head. With a wince, he pulled himself up, gingerly touching his head - his scales were damaged, and blood was dried on his head. He winced slightly as pain shot through both his head and right hand.
Shit. They will definitely notice this… He thought to himself as he took a ragged breath. He looked where the hole had appeared - there was nothing, the ground was undisturbed. His gaze lingered on it, before he eventually turned, and continued to make his way towards his clearing, still in the darkness of the night, like nothing had happened.
It has been so long since the last one. Why now? Why is she tormenting me? His questions were left unanswered. He forced himself to stop, and after taking a deep breath, he looked around, listening for any nearby river or something. Sniffing around, he could feel the smell of water off in the distance, and so, he began making his way there.
I need to wash off the blood.
Within a few minutes, he had found a large river, the water flowing down with relative force. Kneeling down at its edge, he leaned forward, and began cleaning his head and hand with practiced, almost robotic movements. The proof of his weakness stinged and flared up at the cold touch of water, but he did not care. He watched as the water slowly took on a red hue, before disappearing down the river.
Within another few minutes, Velnil could easily make out the outline of the injury - it wasn’t too big, but it was most definitely noticeable, and will take days - if not a few weeks - to properly heal. He could hide it, since he was still somewhat bigger than everyone else - but then that would go against his plan on appearing meek and unsure about things.
Maybe I could use it. Play it off as having a bad night. Maybe I could get them to give me more food than they planned. The humans are very empathetic, I’m sure that after seeing this, they would feel bad enough for me to somewhat drop their guard. Maybe I can even fool some of the prey. Yes, that, being attacked by one should be enough for them to not view me as a threat.
Satisfied with the plan, Velnil got back up, and with a sigh and a few minutes of walking, he finally made his way back to the clearing. Lying down on the cold ground, he carefully rested his head atop his bag once again, looking at nothing in particular.
His next few minutes were filled with rolling around, unable to go back to sleep, as his thoughts were slowly but surely going back to the krakotl he saw. The green feathers, adorned by a red pattern, its yellow beak, and similarly yellow eyes.
Yellow eyes that stared deep into his soul.
The yellow eye that has fallen out of its socket, to leave an empty void to devour his soul.
Velnil forced his eyes shut, turning around again. Not again. He thought, forcing himself to think of other things - the taste of the prey animal he caught, his way towards Earth, the russif.
Eventually, within a gruesome few minutes, Velnil was finally granted the sweet release of sleep.
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