ENBD account was blocked by Dubai court on a cheque bounce case. Settled with the court, got installments. Received Letter from court asking bank to remove the block but it's been 3 days, account is still blocked. Went to the bank, said court will send them the same letter & their back office will release the account. Don't know where to go or what to do next. Any suggestions. TIA

I have a 9k BTU mini split that's taking care of my 2 car garage in Las Vegas that I installed back in 2018. It's vastly undersized. The online calculator told me to get a 36k BTU mini split. It's kinda surprising I need a 3 ton unit for a 2 car garage, but the online calculator can't be wrong.
Anyway, I need something that can cool down the garage fast and I think a 3 ton mini split can do just that. I can turn it on when I need to. My current 9k BTU unit takes literally days to hit a setpoint of 75.
I have the condenser in the side of my house. It's not so big and it's kinda hidden behind a bush. The 3 ton unit I want to get has a condenser that's twice as big. My HOA will send me a letter if they see it.
I want to run a PVC conduit along the side of my house to hide the lineset. Maybe a 1-1/2" PVC, around 60 feet going into my backyard to where the new 3 ton condenser will be sitting. I've never seen or heard anyone do this before. Any thoughts or concerns? The lineset will be around 60 feet long, the unit will probably be 410A and they come with 12 feet of lineset, so I'll have to add another 50 feet or so. I still have half a jug of 410A left in my garage I can add to make up.
Any ideas, thoughts or concerns will be greatly appreciated. Just to add, I am an HVAC tech but only for an apartment complex.

Trying to help a friend explore any possible avenues here -
She paid a "contractor" $14K for a new HVAC system. The system stopped working after a week and now she has been without any HVAC for months. She tried giving this man many opportunities to fix it, but finally had an HVAC professional come out for an estimate. They were shocked by the level of incompetence in the install - the guy had even installed the minisplit backwards. Told her it wasn't fixable and they would have to tear out the whole system and start from scratch. (I know a little about HVAC and even I could see the install was not even remotely professional)
So she hired a lawyer to sue the contractor - $2,000 to start. The lawyer told her not to do anything - don't do any repairs, don't try to chargeback the credit card, nothing. He told her he would send a demand letter as a first step and then start looking into the contractor's assets or possible liability insurance. The lawyer stated the man's address and she advised the lawyer that address was incorrect.
Weeks go by and the lawyer just keeps saying "We're waiting for a reply, these things take time, he has 30 business days to reply" - finally, after more than two months the lawyer says "Oh, that letter came back as undeliverable, nothing more we can do, too bad." They had sent it to the address she told them was wrong, and also took a ridiculous amount of time to tell her it wasn't delivered (when they would have known that within a week or two)
So she asks for her $2,000 back, and is told they are dissolving the law firm and maybe they can refund her a tiny bit of what she paid. She contacted the credit card company to see about a chargeback for the contractor's $14K (which the lawyer had told her to wait on) and finds out it's too late for a chargeback.
On top of all that, she spends 20 minutes online and is able to find the contractor's actual address, as well as his long trail of lawsuits and bankruptcies. That's how long it would have taken this lawyer to do their job correctly.
I know it's a longshot, but any chance she has a case for malpractice for the lawyer advising her not to pursue other remedies but then not doing their job?

TLDR: Some background. I live in a city that has an artist's co-op. During the pandemic, we relocated to a wonderful location. We were asked by the President when we picked up our door fobs if we agreed to have our personal info/image on the website. I said no because I was stalked, and have PTSD because of it (for real). I am on disability for this and depression. I have not worked for quite a while.
Forward two years later. Another member of this co-op asked if I would sell her small work at the outdoor market I had arranged. Let's call her Joy. I said yes. Then to help me with the tent, I asked her to come with me. I said it would have to be only be her small work, because I had over 138 pieces. Six weeks later, the night before (to make this part very short), I asked her how many pieces besides the small works she was planning on bringing bc I saw her picture of a fully loaded car. (!) She replied Well just come out and tell me you don't want me to go! I thought very carefully about my response because she has a sharp temper often in the studio. My response was to tell her that she should do what she feels is best. You can just imagine the text fall out from that. She went off on me via text. Therefore, she did not go.
Weeks later, I am at the co-op on my scheduled night. She shows up (she knew I was there bc she saw my car). The second the last person left, she started to scream at me. She ran over from the other side of the room and stood above me. She was red and shaking her fists. I could feel her spittle on my cheek.
When she turned around I texted a fellow member to say I was in trouble. I ran to the bathroom and locked the door. I was in there for at least half an hour. The member talked me through it, said that she would have her bf call 911 if she was still there. I was sobbing and shaking. But she had indeed left.
Two days later, I went to the police. They told me that I had to go through the board at my co-op first.
At this point, at no time was there any bylaws posted or shared with any member. I got a copy from a board member though she apologized that it wasn't posted.
I did report it to the President. Her solution was to have a separate meeting with Joy and me at the guild. And I was told that I would have to sign something. The day before the meeting I hired a lawyer to accompany me because I no longer felt safe in that space.
The president commented that she had evidence that I was entering the space. I said that yes I was, but it was late at night (like 1 am) , and I would lock the door put a sign up with my cell number to call to be let in. I was told by my psychologist to do that (I have a letter stating that) bc of my ptsd. All the times that I did go in, not a single guild member ever showed up.
Within half an hour of sending that email, I was told I was kicked out immediately. It was cc'ed to all 90 members. They took two months to refund my fees and then didn't refund the correct amount.
One of the bylaws of this provincially funded co-op is that you cannot be a member in good standing unless you pay for the full six months. I have it on record that Joy bragged about only paying her fees monthly because the president was her bestie. I have text from another member who also only pays in monthly instalments.
It's coming up to almost a year. I am considering going to the human rights commission but I am not sure if this would be considered a violation. I did not go back to the police because I could barely take care of myself. I felt like I was retraumatized all over again. The president knew I had ptsd. Maybe she thought I was joking?
I hired a lawyer and she stated that what was done was against the Society's Act, but it would cost 10 000 dollars, so why not wait until the board changed? Now the president is the treasurer. Go figure.
Is there any point taking this back to the police? Is there any point in going to the Human Rights Commission?

I am NOT OOP. OOP is u/justathrowaway282641
Originally posted to TwoHotTakes + her own page
Previous BoRU #1, BoRU #2, BoRU #3, BoRU #4, BoRU #5, BoRU 6
Editor’s Note: removed all relevant comments from older posts to make space for new updates. To see all older relevant comments, check out the previous BoRUs above
NEW UPDATE MARKED WITH ----
[New Update]: My family forgot to invite me to my grandparents funeral, but they are convinced I was there.
Trigger Warnings: death of loved ones, emotional manipulation, gaslighting, harassment
RECAP
Original Post: November 14, 2023**
I’m 30s F and caused a major blowup in my family and now none of them are talking to me. For background, my hometown is tiny (500pop) and when I went 2 hrs away to “the city” (15,000pop) for college, I loved it. I ended up staying after graduation, got married, and am happy here for a decade. I visit my home town every few weeks or so, call/text my family near daily, and thought we were all good. My family’s pretty small. Just my brother, mom, step dad, dad, step mom, and an aunt and uncle (mom’s siblings, never married, no kids). My mother's grandparents moved to my home town when I was in high school and were just down the street from us. My family has always been pretty drama free (aside from my parent’s divorce when I was a kid) and we’ve been happy. The step-parents were blended in perfectly and we share holidays and celebrations together. We’re all super close and just the perfect little group.
Ever since I moved away, the topic of “when am I moving back?” is constant, and I’ve always laughed it off. My home town has nothing. You have to drive 30 minutes for milk and bread. 60-90 minute one-way commutes to work. And floods shut down the main road every Easter. I love the town, but I love here more. I have parks, stores, community events, a library! The “city” is great. My family grumbles that I need to move back, but I refuse. I've been trying to encourage them to come here, especially since it's not an hour drive to the nearest medical facility.
Now to the meat and potatoes: both my grandparents passed over COVID times. They were both old and their health had been failing for a while so it was only a matter of time. Thankfully they didn’t catch it, but it made visiting them impossible and we survived mostly through FaceTime. They both passed in their sleep months apart. Both were cremated and kept securely under the kitchen sink for safe keeping while the pandemic blew over. That was 2021.
Well, I just found out my family held a funeral for them and scattered the ashes in my uncle’s maple grove over the summer. No one said a word to me about it. I’ve visited numerous times before and after and not one word. I only found out because my great uncle from California posted on Facebook a few weeks ago that he is entering hospice and was so thankful his health stayed strong enough for him to see his little sister (my grandma) to her final resting place. I was confused and called my mom. She was all “Yeah, the funeral we had in July, remember?” Ya’ll, I visited them for the 4th of July. They did the funeral the 8th. Not a word about it to me. They had planned this for months. Long enough to arrange for my infirm great uncle to be brought over from the other side of the country. Apparently, they talked about it “all the time”.
Everyone is convinced I was at the funeral. They SWEAR I was there. I can prove I wasn’t because Google’s got my location history. My hubby is baffled because he was supposedly there, too, but he had to work every weekend in June and July. Time clock doesn’t lie. My family straight up forgot about me. I’m hurt. I’m sad. And they’re pissed at me “for lying”. They think I’m causing drama over nothing. Nothing I say can convince them I wasn’t there. My family is united in this. And they’ve all put me “on read” until I admit I’m wrong. They think I’ve gone nuts. Either there’s a doppelganger of me attending events, or my family doesn’t want to admit they screwed up. I’m not backing down.
Thanksgiving is coming up, and my family’s been vague posting on Facebook about “forgetful kids” and mental health. It’s so freaking weird and I don’t know if I’m in bizzaro world or what’s going on. My mom’s best friend reached out and said I should just admit I was wrong and apologize, that I’m causing my mom so much unnecessary stress. I asked her if she’s checked everyone’s home for CO2. She hung up on me. (We checked our CO2, and our testers are running just fine.) I have reached out to a few people in my home town to check in on my folks, and they all say they're fine. I even spoke with the local volunteer fire fighter group to see if they could check for gas leaks. Not sure if they were able to.
I don’t know what to do. I’ve shown them the proof I wasn’t there, but they know I’m tech savvy and just assume I’ve Photoshopped it. Hubby says we need a break, and we’re going to be staying home this holiday season.
Edit: I don't know the update rules, so I'll post updates to my profile should anyone want them.  
Update #1: November 27, 2023
Not sure how to do updates on posts, so figured I'd post anything on my profile. Folks have private messaged me and this will be easier I think?
It's 11/27 and Thanksgiving just happened. Hubby and I stayed home. We got a small turkey and made our own little thanksgiving. It was nice. We ate around noon, then watched a movie, and later sat outside with a bottle of wine to watch the sun set behind the trees and neighbor houses.
We usually take the day before off, drive to my folks, stay the night, and help with the Thanksgiving Day cooking. So it wasn't until Wednesday night that my mom broke the silence. Mom called and asked when I was showing up, and I told her we were staying home this year, but for them to have a happy Thanksgiving, and to give the rest of the family my love. She was quiet for a long time after I said that, and I think she eventually mumbled an "okay", or something, and hung up. It wasn't an angry hang up. Just a hang up. On Thanksgiving day, I sent a group "Happy Thanksgiving!" gif to our family group chat. I received a few "happy Thanksgiving"'s back. No one's said anything else. There's been no posts on Facebook.  
Update #2: December 12, 2023
So, I think I mentioned in one of my comments that my dad and I usually talk on the phone every Sunday morning. We're both early risers so we'd chat over our morning coffees and watch the sunrise. Him and I haven't really spoken since this all went down and it's been tough. I'm used to talking to him, you know?
Well, I was sitting outside in my usual spot, watching the sun rise and freezing my butt off, and he called me. I'm not entirely sure how to describe the emotions I felt. It was a mix of panic, hope, terror, happiness, and dread. I ended up answering because I just had to know what he wanted. It was an awkward conversation. He didn't address the current "drama", but instead tiptoed around the situation with all the grace of an cow on stilts. For instance, a simple "How are you doing?" Type question was answered with a "Not good." And the whole conversation would stall out for a bit because he knew why I wasn't doing well. So we ended up talking about the weather, the various winter birds we'd seen in our feeders, and the Christmas decorations around town. Things like that.
Eventually he asked if we were coming out for Christmas, and sounded sad when I told him we weren't. He asked if him and step mom could come visit us instead, and I told him it wasn't a good idea this year. That hubby and I were going to spend a quiet holiday together. I let him know he should be receiving some gifts at his PO Box any day now, so to please pick them up from the post office and put them under the family tree for everyone. He said he'd ship ours to us as well.
And that was pretty much it. No crazy drama to report. The only posts on Facebook have been the usual Christmas excitement ones, countdowns, photos of Santa, silly gift ideas, photos of company Christmas parties.
On a personal note: Hubby and I are doing alright. Our health is good, our spirits high, and we're as solid as ever. We each got Christmas bonus' at our jobs, so we're excited about that. They're not large, but we're happy to have them. We have also done advent calendars for the first time ever. I got him a Lego one, and he got me a hot chocolate one. We're going to do the calendars again next year. Maybe make a tradition out of it.
Everyone please have a safe and happy holidays.  
Inheritance: December 16, 2023
I've received a lot - A LOT - of messages and private DMs urging me to check into inheritance and such. I'm really touched a lot of Internet strangers are worried about me and I wanted to ensure everyone that inheritance is most likely not an issue here. I'd almost be relieved if it was, because then it would at least make some sense. Money does weird things to people, you know?
No one in my family is wealthy by any means. After my grandparents' passed, their small estate was used to pay for their end of life expenses and remaining assets split up. Everyone directly related got an equal split (so excluded my dad and the step parents). I don't remember the exact amount I received, but it was around $5k if I recall. My brother gave me his share, too, so I could finish paying off my college debt while the interest freeze was active.
The great uncle from California has kids and grand kids, and great grandkids of his own, and also isn't wealthy. I think one of his kids makes good money doing something in finance, but I'm not entirely sure. I can't imagine he left us anything, as we hardly knew him. My mom, aunt, and uncle only met him a few times in their lives, and my brother and I even less. Grandma and him were close, but I don't think he liked my grandpa much.  
Christmas: December 25, 2023
I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas. I've received a lot of support through my posts and I'm really grateful. Writing these updates have had a therapeutic effect.
Yesterday was Sunday, but I didn't answer my dad when he called. I just really didn't feel up to a pointless chat, so let it go to voicemail. He tried to reach me a few times throughout the day, but I didn't answer.
Our bestie last minute invited us over to his house for Christmas day lunch (today), so husband and I were busy all Christmas Eve making cookies, peanut brittle, and homemade suckers/hard candies for his kids. Mom tried to reach out as well, but I also ignored her calls.
We had a BLAST at lunch! Our friend's kids are a lot of fun to be around. They got some techy presents from their grandparents (Quest vr headset and steam decks, lucky little rascals) Friend and his wife aren't good with tech, while hubby and I are, so we helped get them set up while our friend played a good host to his folks and inlaws. The grandparents didn't realize that a Steam deck required a Steam account, so we got the kids all their own accounts set up, added them to our steam friends lists, and gifted them some games. We also bought them a few VR games for their headset, and they were off to the races with Beat Saber in no time.
As for my folks: My brother texted and asked if we could talk sometime tomorrow. I think me ignoring mom and dad has caused some kind of upset. Which they deserve.  
Brother’s call: December 26, 2023
Spoke with my brother over the phone this morning.
For starters, he apologized for everything. Him and I are good (for now). For a bit of background, my brother and I are only 2 years apart. There weren't a lot of kids around growing up, so the two of us were often stuck doing stuff together. So we have a lot of shared interests and passions. He's been pretty silent on this whole matter, but still "part of the group", if you know what I mean. I think the thought of losing him out of my life was probably the most painful, because he's always been there. He was my rock until I met my husband. He's definitely a Mama's boy, though, so anything mom wanted, he made sure she got. I'm happy to have him back.
Without further ado, here's the story from the horse's mouth:
Mom apparently had a cancer scare late last year (which no one told me about, go figure), and dad had a stint put in his heart back in January (which I did know about). This "sense of mortality" has apparently lit a fire under Mom's ass to get me back home. But since I wasn't reacting to her passive aggressive hinting, she and step mom decided to go full crazy. My great uncle's health was bad, and he'd been asking about funeral arrangements for his sister (my grandma) for a while, so the moms decided to plan it. And use the event as a giant middle finger to me. They kept all the planning pretty hush-hush between the two of them, so no one on our side of the family actually knew about the funeral until like 2 weeks before. The moms said they'd invited hubby and I. No one thought anything about it. No one thought to mention, confirm, or check with me.
The plan was to scatter the ashes, say a few words, and maybe head to town for lunch. It was a small affair. The mom's didn't even tell the family that our great uncle was coming for it. Like I said, it was a small thing. Barely a footnote. No one thought it was odd because we're pretty chill people.
4th of July happens. Hubby and I are out. No one thought to mention it, as we were all busy celebrating and having a great time. Any time the topic of "this weekend" would start, the conversation would be quickly shifted by one of the moms. We went back home.
8th of July happens. Great uncle rolls into town with a few of his kids, grandkids, and great grandkids, and it's a surprise to everyone (but the moms). Everyone drives to the maple grove and the moms have brought a ton of food and stuff. It's a full blown party. No one on my side noticed I wasn't there, because there were so many extra faces outside the usual group. They did the spreading of the ashes, they said their words, they ate, they had a great time. It wasn't until our great uncle left, and all his side left with him, that they realized I wasn't there. And hadn't been there.
And this is where the crazy went up a notch. My brother says the moms were happy no one noticed I wasn't there. And that this was proof to everyone that I needed to move back because I was so easily forgotten about. Because none of them thought to reach out, right? They basically did a ton of guilt tripping manipulation bullshit and it made everyone upset at me for not showing up. Somehow it was my fault for being excluded. So suddenly everyone was on their side with "sticking it to me".
But then a few months went by, and tempers cooled, and then I guess the horror of it set in. Followed by the shame, but by then they were "in too deep". How do you undo something like this? And since I hadn't brought it up, I guess they figured they would all just stay quiet about it and hope I never asked about a funeral.
That's when I discovered the situation from my great uncle's Facebook and called my mom, who panicked and went with the stupidest solution. Claiming I was there. Don't I remember?
I ended up talking with a few friends from high school, mentioning the situation, and word got back to those in town. So suddenly town gossip and little old church ladies got involved. Was I, or wasn't I at the funeral? Did my family forget to invite me to the funeral of the only grandparents I'd ever know? Or am I just causing a ruckus? My brother said they all just went with mom's answer. Of course they wouldn't forget me. Of course I was there. Of course they're good people. And it just snowballed.
The family expected me to eventually fold. I'm usually a nonconfrontational person, so me sticking to my guns was unexpected. And then I missed Thanksgiving. And now Christmas. With no sign of backing down. And I guess the realization that I could just stop being part of their lives is setting in and my parents are panicking. He's tried just getting them to apologize and explain, but stubbornness prevails. They want to rug sweep, but I'm not letting them.
My brother is upset with everything that's happened. He's realized just how crappy it all has been and he wants nothing to do with it anymore. But since he lives with my mom, he can't "get away from it".
He has asked if he can come stay with us for a little bit. I spoke with hubby, and he's in agreement with me that my brother can come crash in our spare bedroom for as long as he wants. Brother works remotely, so it's no trouble for him to pick up and go. I believe he's making the trip today or tomorrow. Not entirely sure, but I expect crap to hit the fan when he arrives.
On a side note, hubby's stoked that my brother and I made up. The two usually game together, but haven't due to "the situation". He's downstairs right now setting up his man cave in preparation for my brother's arrival. I'm happy to see him so excited.  
Brother's Here: December 27, 2023
My brother rolled in late last night. He'd obviously been crying and when I opened the door, he just held me and sobbed. I'd never seen him like that before and soon both of us were just standing in the doorway crying into one another. He kept apologizing. Over and over again. Said he wasn't sure why he went with it. Just kept saying sorry. Hubby got him all set up in the spare bedroom while brother and I talked. My brother's a wreck. He's always been a big guy, but he's lost a lot of weight and his clothes just hang off him. If I didn't know better, I'd think he was on drugs. We talked for a little bit before bed and he re-explained everything for my husband. I'd told hubby the story, but it was just so weird that hearing it again helped.
This morning my brother was up at dawn making some coffee and getting his work day going. Hubby's off all week (lucky) so hubby made us working folk some pancakes and bacon. So far everything's peaceful. We've decided not to answer any calls from our family. They've been made aware that he arrived safely, and that we are going to spend the New Years together, and that we're not answering any calls until January 1st. They may text if they wish. I'm sure they're losing their minds. Serves them right.
Everyone, have a safe and happy new years! Don't drink and drive!  
Happy 2024!: January 2, 2024
I hope everyone has a safe and enjoyable holidays, and may the new year be full of joy and happiness!
Not too much of an update. Things here have been quiet. My brother's settled in nicely and he's a great housemate. Our place isn't very big, but we have full basement and a nice outside patio/porch area so it doesn't feel crowded at all with the extra addition. He's a quiet and clean guy. No hassle at all. He got some fresh clothes from the Walmart, a haircut, and trimmed his beard, so he's more "presentable" now. He's a lady killer when he gets cleaned up. He's made nice with the (very nosy, but kind) retired couple next door and is adapting to "city living" nicely.
Folks back home have been mostly well behaved. There's been a few texts back and forth, as we're not answering calls. Mom mainly wants to know when brother's coming back, but he's keen on staying here for a while. Mom said I can't "keep him" and I told her he's a grown ass man and can do what he wants. Brother says he has her blocked after she ORDERED him to return home.
Brother has tentatively asked if he could stay long term, should he decide to, or at least longer than a usual visitor would stay. Which we're fine with. He has a good paying job and could afford an apartment, but he's never lived on his own and I would guess he has some anxiety about it. Should that be the case, he'll start paying us some rent and we'd probably adjust to give him the basement as his own space.  
Had to change the locks: January 17, 2024
My brother is officially staying with us for the long haul. Hubby and him spent all Sunday organizing the basement and shifting things around so he now has his own area to be comfortable in. He's pretty handy and has also started fixing little things around our house. Our windows and doors have never closed and locked/unlocked smoother. He even fixed one of the closets we never use because we can never get the darn door open. Sadly, he also had to change the locks on our house and get us all new keys.
This is because while hubby and I were out this Saturday, the moms showed up. They'd been calling and texting us all week, but we weren't really answering them, so I guess the two decided to drive over and hash it out in person. They have emergency keys to my place, and just let themselves in. Brother told them to leave, they argued, and my nosy (but kind) neighbors called the police when they noticed the commotion. So, we get a call from neighbor's wife, return home to some cops in our yard, all the neighbors out "vacuuming their trees", and my nosy (but kind) neighbors standing on my porch with my brother behind them, doing their best Gandalf "You shall not pass" impression.
Had to talk with the cops, explain that we were having a family dispute and word vomited. I don't really remember what all I said, and was shaking a lot. Our local cops are really great. Fantastic guys and gals in blue, and took it all in stride. It's really cold here, so one had me join him in his cruiser with the heat on, and gave me a bottle of water to calm down while we talked. They asked if we wanted the moms trespassed but I wasn't sure if that counted as a criminal charge so just asked the cops if they could just make them leave, which the cops did with no fuss. I think the moms were shocked we were taking this so seriously. They didn't fight or scream at us. Just left quietly.
My dad promised me he'd make sure his wife left us alone. "Or else". He said he'd also have a stern talk with my mom. Him and I talked Sunday morning, and he seemed absolutely at the end of his rope. Husband jokingly told my dad he could move in, too. To which he declined.
Not sure where to go from here, but we're getting some ring cameras installed once they arrive. And everyone but my dad is blocked. Hopefully they all just leave us alone.  
Nothing New To Report: February 2, 2024
Had a lot of DMs for updates, but don't have much anything to report on. The moms are behaving themselves. All's quiet on the western front. Felt weird ignoring or copy/pasting "no updates" to everyone, so here's what we've been doing, should anyone care.
Dad got a new bird/squirrel feeder from Amazon (looks like a little picnic table for a child's dolly but has a mesh top for the bird seed. I think it's supposed to be for chickens?) It's totes adorbs. To his horror, it also works as a Cooper hawk feeder, so now he's "fortifying his defenses" and putting up some trellises around it. He'll have to wait till warmer weather before planting anything to grow on them.
We had some ring cameras installed and put in a motion-activated camera that double functions as a light bulb. It goes in the light fixture outside the front door and is pretty cool. Video quality isn't all that great, but it's a nice addition I guess. It does overlook the bird feeders, so I've been watching it on my lunch breaks on the days I have to go into the office.
Hubby and brother are feuding. They started a coop farm in Stardew Valley a few days ago and they both want to romance Leah. My husband confided in me that he's also been romancing Sebastian as a backup. I'm not sure why he's keeping this a secret, but he's pretty smug about it.
RELEVANT COMMENTS
fractal_frog I hope your dad can outsmart the hawks!

OOP: He'll be able to, I just know it. He's used to dealing with the wildlife and having hawks about, but he just wasn't expecting one to snag a meal right from his new feeder.
I told him it was "technically" still a bird feeder. Just....for bigger birds. Which he thought was funny. He said he might make a little "no hawks allowed" sign to put up next to it.

MissOP: keep the updates coming. the moms are so close to folding it's just a little bit more. LMAO also, the bro mance between your husband and brother is so cute. lol Honestly, I think your husband making sure he has a side piece of Sebastian is absolutely the play.

OOP: So far still no word from the moms, but I hope you're right. I would love an apology and for us to begin moving past this. But I NEED that apology. I feel selfish saying that, but I refuse to "be the bigger person" on this. I just won't.
As for my brother and husband, yeah, they're basically soul mates. The two hit it off immediately when they first met, and they've been thick as thieves for years.  

Update: February 27, 2024
My dad came out for a visit over the weekend. We had a good time and the weather was lovely for some grilling and beers. It was really nice to see him again and he seemed healthy and in good spirits.
Here's his report from back home: Step mom (dad's wife) has started to realize she's screwed up. I credit her change of mindset to the fact that my dad sat her down and laid it out for her: she leaves his kids alone, or she's getting divorce papers. That apparently shut her up right quick, because they had a prenup done when they married and I'm not sure the details of it, but it wouldn't end favorably for her. She hasn't worked in years, so I imagine she'd be eligible for alimony? But I'm not versed in any of that legal mumbojumbo. Dad didn't seem too worried about it, so I'm not gonna worry about it.
Step dad was pissed the police were involved in the last "mom visit" (despite no one getting arrested or anything) and was in a "the kids are out of control and need to be reigned back in" mindset. When my dad pointed out that "the kids" in question were all in their mid-30s, it took some of the steam out of stepdad's sails. According to my dad, even my mom looked a little surprised when he said that. So, part of me is wondering if a good chunk of this whole thing is my mom not truly realizing that her kids were grown, and no longer children she could make demands of. Both of the moms have left us alone. I expected my mom to continue to kick up a fuss, but I think the cops spooked her.
There was a wonderful suggestion by a comment or to get their pastor involved, which I passed along to my dad. Dad has since spoken to their pastor about everything. He's a young guy, relatively new to their church, and joked that his first month on the job he had to do 3 funerals in a row and his new "flock" were just dying to get away from him, so he's got a sense of humor which is nice. The new pastor agreed to sit down with everyone and help the family hash it all out in a true "Come to Jesus" type moment next month, so that maybe we could celebrate Easter together as our first holiday as a family. Dad said the pastor was aware our family was having some troubles, but unsure of exactly what was going on, and since he was new, the pastor didn't want to pry. He has also agreed to do a small service down at my uncle's maple grove later in the summer, as it usually floods and is a muddy mess all spring. According to my dad, my aunt and uncle are so over all the drama and just ready to move on, so I expect hugs and apologies from them when we next meet.
Stardew Valley Update: My brother was victorious in the grand fight for Leah. It was a hard battle. Well fought. When my husband exposed his plans to woo Sebastian all this time, it was quite the betrayal. Dramatics aside, their farm is really cute and I'm so happy they're enjoying the game!  
Update 4/1 - Final one I think - April 1, 2024
Happy April Fools everyone! I hope you all check your caramel apples for stray onions before taking a bite! I also hope your Easter weekend was a delightful one.
It is with great joy that I tell you all about our most recent update! Possibly even a conclusion to this whole ordeal.
The entire family (aunt, uncle, moms, dads, brother, me, husband) and pastor met at my dad's house and we all sat down to hash the situation out. As expected from what my dad said, my aunt and uncle greeted us all with apologies and hugs, which was nice. My uncle usually helps host the Easter egg hunts with the church and he brought our Easter baskets to give to us in case us kids weren't sticking around the for the weekend. I'm not sure why but seeing it made me tear up and feel stupid, because it was just a basket of candy but it meant a lot to me for some reason.
The pastor led us in a prayer and talked about forgiveness and such. He then asked us all to talk one at a time about how we're feeling and what we want the end result of today to be. No one was allowed to interrupt so everyone got to talk. It was nice. The consensus for the group was that most everyone wanted things to go back to "normal". The only ones who had any variance off this was my mom and step dad. They both wanted all us kids to move back to the area.
The pastor asked them why they wanted us back, and neither could give a good reason other than "because family", and the pastor asked us if we were thriving where we were. And we said we were. He asked if we were happy there. Which we were. He then asked my mom and step dad if they wanted us to give up our happiness to make them happy.
And Mom broke down and said no. We all had a good cry. The pastor then asked about the funeral and lies that led up to it and followed it and how it made us all feel and what we wished we'd done differently if we had the chance. It was all very emotional, but in a good way, you know? Everyone apologized and admitted they f-ed up and did a really crappy thing.
We all talked for a long, long time and the pastor was a great mediator. Eventually we all reached some sort of resolution and I think we're good now. Emotions are still high and a little raw in areas, but we stayed for Easter weekend and had a nice time. We're going to keep moving forward slowly and try to repair the relationship, but I believe we're well and truly out of the woods.
As for my brother, he's still staying with us, and mom will stop trying to guilt trip him back home. He's thinking about renting a small apartment in our area but we're not pushing him to make a decision. He knows he's welcome to stay as long as he wants. I think he wants to try dating (he's had a few girlfriends but never anything serious) and is embarrassed to bring any girls around our place, lol. He's been going to a few random classes/bookclubs at the local library for something free to do and hitting it off with all the little old ladies who attend, and they keep trying to hook him up with girls his age who they know. He has been on a few lunches/coffee dates with a couple girls, but I think he's too embarrassed by the attention to give it a real try at "dating" any of them. He's happy, though, which is all I could ask for.
I'm not sure if there will be any more updates, as I think it's all be resolved about as much as it can be at the moment. I wanted to thank you all for your words of advice and giving me a place to vent and scream into the void. Please be kind to one another and to yourselves. Thank you.
Relevant Comments
emjkr: What a nice and hopeful update, I’m really glad you stuck to your guns when everyone threw sanity out the window!
But, could your mother explain how she thought this would work out in her favour?

OOP: I don't think mom thought too far ahead. I believe she assumed it would all just magically work out the way she wanted it to. She said she wasn't sure what she was expecting to happen (which I think was a lie, but I wasn't going to push it).

mak_zaddy: This was a great update! But ummmmmm no stardew valley update? What gives? Has Sebastian been woo’ed? How’s Leah? What’s happening?

OOP: Sebastian has indeed been wooed (and whoohooed) There's kids and cows and chickens. The two are still having a wonderful time at the game. They're working on completing the community center but it's slow going as they aren't trying to speedrun and just doing things as they want. I believe they're thinking about going into the desert mines once they complete that bundle, but they're both super chicken shit about it!

-my-cabbages: I don't really understand what you had to apologize for ... but I'm glad you're happy and the situation seems to be settling down

OOP: There wasn't much of an apology on my end, as everyone agreed I had done nothing wrong. Mine was more of a "I'm sorry you didn't feel as though I would listen." Type apology, which I don't really believe is a proper apology because apologies like that push the blame back on another. I mostly expressed my feelings and the shock of it all, and how betrayed I felt.  

----NEW UPDATE----

Small, happy update: May 7, 2024 (1 month later)
Things as wonderful as the moment. Still doing baby steps with The Moms. We're texting and talking on the phones more, which is nice. Very civil.
Dad "accidentally" bought a bunch of hand crafted bird feeders at a craft fair. By accidentally, I mean: he had a little too much fun in the beer tent, went for a stroll while step mom wasn't looking, and stumbled upon a guy's booth and bought "one of each". He wouldn't tell me how MANY "one of each" was, but he cackled like a witch when I asked. Step mom said she's forcing him to give a few to me, so I'm expecting a delivery or a Dad-visit any day now.
My brother is officially "going steady" with a girl. We've met her a few times and she seems like a real sweetheart. She's our age and has a little boy (5-6 years old, I haven't asked) from a previous relationship (The dad's not in the picture from what I can gather). She's the granddaughter of one of his Book Club members, so the old ladies made good match makers in the end. The relationship is still very new and I'm routing for them.
No new Stardew Valley updates. Work has been a little crazy lately and I haven't been able to play much of anything, and brother has been distracted by his new lady friend. So, husband finally started Baldur's Gate 3, and fell for Gale's "magic trick" so now those two are a thing. I expect him to be sufficiently distracted from reality for the next few weeks.
 

DO NOT COMMENT IN LINKED POSTS OR MESSAGE OOPs – BoRU Rule #7

THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT OOP

Recently u/scorpiogirl12 had a question on a so-called "legal advice" ("legaladvice") reddit site, which is anything but. I was unable to give my advice on that subreddit since I was "permanently banned" for offering a servicemember with a USERRA issue to "DM" me, given the privacy issues involved with their employment situation. Frankly, "legaladvice" is nothing but a sham. They don't have legal professionals there, just a bunch of two-bit "sea lawyers" willing to give their "opinions."
That being said, Scorpiogirl12 has a serious issue that affects her and her husband's employment situation in the face of a very long service obligation. That's why I reposted her situation here so she can receive quality guidance, rather then the garbage at "legaladvice."
Scorpiogirl12's question was: "My husband recently got put back on military orders for the next 3 years (he has been enlisted since 2020). Last week, he notified his employer that his start date would be June 1, 2024. Today, he got an email stating that he must submit a resignation letter on 5/24/25 and he would be effectively resigned on 5/25/25. I told him NOT to submit the letter because he is NOT resigning, he is simply going on more active duty orders.
What legal standing do we have if he refuses to submit the letter and they let him go?"
My response:
ESGR Ombudsman DirectoESGR National Trainer here.
Your husband needs to be familiar with ESGR resources, especially as it relates to his rights under USERRA. He should have had briefings on his civilian employment rights.
Regarding your husband's particular situation, it's not up to his employer when he leaves prior to an extended military service. He can take weeks off prior to work (or MORE), or work right up until he reports for duty. 20 CFR 1002.74. It is entirely up to him!
As for his reemployment rights, long as he doesn't exceed five years of cumulative, non-exempt, service, and otherwise complies with his USERRA eligibility requirements, his reemployment rights are protected. 20 CFR 1002.32, .99-.103. They are protected even if he "resigns," signs a notarized statement that he "never wants" his position back, and releases his ER of all rights under USERRA, or otherwise, "forever and ever," "pinky swear."!!! That is because USERRA precludes any "contract" "agreement" or otherwise, that reduces (i.e. "waives" or "releases") his reemployment rights under USERRA. 38 USC 4302.
Regardless of how the ER characterizes the employee's leave of absence, it's considered a "leave of absence" or "furlough." 38 USC 4316(b)(1)(A); 20 CFR 1002.149, .150. As long as he adheres to the eligibility requirements of 20 CFR 1002.32, he will have reemployment rights once he's done with his military service pursuant to 38 USC 4312.
FURTHERMORE, he's entitled to all "pay, seniority, and status" he would have attained once he returned from his uniformed service, AND he is entitled to all missed pension/retirement plan benefits he missed during his uniformed service. IF he has a "contributory" retirement plan where he contributes to the plan, he has 3 times the length of service, but NO MORE than 5 years (in your husband's case), to makeup his contributions.
Go to ESGR.mil under the Servicemembers resource tab for more information. If your husband has any questions, or wants a trained Ombudsman to contact his employer to discuss what USERRA does or does not require, have him request assistance on the site or by calling 800.336.4590.
AS A FINAL NOTE: Ignore the "sea lawyer" opinions on many of the so-called "legal advice" sites. They're garbage, and will simply result in misinformation.

(At least just one board member does)
We have a park in our townhome community with a nice lawn, enclosed tennis courts, and a thirty year old janky swing set. The park is secluded, fenced off, with access only by one staircase. Since I’ve lived here (30+ years) residents have walked down the stairs to the park and let there dogs loose to play, no problems. In fact, one of the retired board members did it daily before he moved. Besides dogs having a ball, this park is dismal. I grew up here and it has always been a lame playground and families and children seldom visit. If people play tennis, they’re enclosed in a fence.
Two weeks ago I see an HOA board member starring at me playing with my dog. Next day, a “ Dogs must be Leashed” sign is up. I and everyone else (about twenty dog owners or more) ignored it. Well, today I got a letter about how that park isn’t a dog park.
What should we do to change the rules? Have a gate installed? Without the dogs it is an unused lonely park. Signatures? Petition? Why all the sudden this a problem? The great majority of people using this park are dog owners. (I live right in front of the park and this has been true for years)
Also. I’m thinking about reporting that swing-set? It was installed before 1992 and never inspected or updated since. Can I use this a leverage? Lmao. I’m in California btw.
Advice wanted. That park needs to be appreciated by those who actually use it.

We have a park in our townhome community with a nice lawn, enclosed tennis courts, and a thirty year old janky swing set. The park is secluded, fenced off, with access only by one staircase. Since I’ve lived here (30+ years) residents have walked down the stairs to the park and let there dogs loose to play, no problems. In fact, one of the retired board members did it daily before he moved. Besides dogs having a ball, this park is dismal. I grew up here and it has always been a lame playground and families and children seldom visit. If people play tennis, they’re enclosed in a fence.
Two weeks ago I see an HOA board member starring at me playing with my dog. Next day, a “ Dogs must be Leashed” sign is up. I and everyone else (about twenty dog owners or more) ignored it. Well, today I got a letter about how that park isn’t a dog park.
What should we do to change the rules? Have a gate installed? Without the dogs it is an unused lonely park. Signatures? Petition? Why all the sudden this a problem? The great majority of people using this park are dog owners. (I live right in front of the park and this has been true for years)
Also. I’m thinking about reporting that swing-set? It was installed before 1992 and never inspected or updated since. Can I use this a leverage? Lmao. I’m in California btw.
Advice wanted. That park needs to be appreciated by those who actually use it.

I have around 14k in backpay from SSI and the first two payments are only a little under 3k. My backpay for SSDI is 34k before lawyer fees and deducting the SSI backpay. I have only got the first SSI installment so far. I wanna move into a studio and my income isn't the 2.5x rent most places require but they said they can take savings into account. One place told me I needed atleast 21k in savings the others don't specify. Would SSI let me get my backpay early so I can move into a unit? They said in the letter they sent they give backpay early for special circumstances. I just wanna move into a studio so bad and wish they don't have the 3 installment rule for SSI.

1. Do not go too far underground or there is the nether or the deep 1.1 Do not exceed personal ability limit for the wargame 1.1.1 Do not allow X-Rays or too much high frequency into the signal 1.1.2 Do not allow Mutagens or too much Bass in the signal 1.1.3 Do not allow fire unless specifically working with fire 1.1.4 Do not exceed cost limit 5000 actual barrel cost for barrel to item limit 1.1.5 Do not exceed 2 knots at a time in a blueprint or mutagen will form 1.1.6 Do not exceed 1 pass a time in a blueprint or mutagen will form 1.1.7 (Our Foundry Specific) Do not Exceed 100 points of cost detail 1.1.8 Do not exceed 1 point of cost offset overflow 1.1.9 To not underflow 1 point of cost offset overflow 1.2.1 Do not combine source besides with metal 1.2.2 Do not combine motion except with a hydrogen range 1.2.3 Do not combine weed except with motion 1.2.4 Do not use small lettering or large lettering any letters besides standard -33 MID set 1.2.5 Do not create aurora and create quality assurance to avoid aurora 1.2.6 Do not output liquid or gas products except liquid product for a medicine or food 1.2.7 Do not exceed 0 nominal (infinity) at sample or a gas explosion will form, even if secret but you may exceed this outside a sample if the total sample global output does not exceed 0 nominal 1.2.8 Take only exact reference measurement at known measurement point 1.2.9 Do not exceed 3 or 4 acts of alkenation 1.3.0 Do not exceed 1 minor act of hydrogenation in a hydrogen synthesis 1.3.1 Do not exceed 2 points of hydrogenation in a core synthesis 1.3.2 Do not exceed 5 points of diolation ever 1.3.3 Do not use tropane or higher frequency 1.3.4 Make sure the signal is pure of heavy metal 1.3.5 Make sure the signal is pure of vaseline 1.3.6 Make sure the signal is pure of methanol and isopropanol and ethanol 1.3.7 Make sure the signal exhibits known food attribute source minisulfur starch sugar hydrogen alkene (edibles, 1/2 diol) for a sugar and does not variate between starch and sugar molecularly or it will be oxiracetam 1.3.8 Make sure in another method that the signal exhibits minisource and minisulfur nutraloaf and starch and hydrogen and alkene (vinegar oil, diol) for a lipid synthesis 1.3.9 Make sure that the synthesis exhibits reference pure source hydrogen alkene in the EDTA/Tianeptine Synthesis 1.4.0 Make sure that the synthesis exhibits hydrogen in an acid synthesis 1.4.1 Make sure that the hydrogenation is not excessive for a hydrochloride synthesis 1.4.2 Make sure that the substance exhibits minisource and sulfur and starch and pepsi-cola and alkene for a chlorophyll synthesis 1.4.3 A computer synthesis does not use the hydrogen romanaj set starch=LED1 sugar=LED2 sweet=LED3 Hydrogen=Hydrogen but hydrogen is not used 1.4.4 A computer synthesis exhibits chassis metal with aerated LEDX,LEDY,(LEDZ) offset chassis paired with at least detectable gold at every LED and two of these LED assembly at least at phase octavver and maybe 3 or 4 assembly total, with a battery in the chassis and a rear chassis without the battery of the same structure of the initial chassis all made from a cohesive resource 1.4.5 A computer sells for reasonable around 1000 dollars or some crypto 1.4.6 A computer comes with an associated online parts kit or actual parts kit which can be used to modify the process function of the CPU (Finder) 1.4.7 A computer can be overclocked by amplifying its LED microoffset fidelity for its core clock phase 1.4.8 A computer accesses a real item by the blueprint and these are certified at least fully functional 1.4.9 A computer references a particular item from the blueprint or has its direct function encoded directly in the token (blueprint either yields unlock item or the blueprint yields the item from what is in the blueprint) 1.5.0 A computer is the portable computer if it is the tablet token and the RGB computer if it is the full represented.

Our child support paperwork from the court (TN) states that both parents have an agreement to pay outside of court, yet the state CS division keeps hounding me and says I’m order to pay them instead. I keep all of my records and I’ve just ignored them until this last letter that said no credit will be given for any payments made by me and will be considered as a “gift” and I could be facing imprisonment if I don’t pay them. I’m thinking I should get a lawyer and maybe even attempt to sue the CS division for harassment and emotional distress.

Hi,
If this is the wrong sub, I apologize. Not sure where to post this type of stuff.
The statute of limitations for my slip and fall personal injury incident is approaching on the 22nd of this month. We are at the end of the process trying to reach an agreement which is good, but we're cutting short on time. My Attorney only got contact from the insurance adjuster back in February and they drug the process on for quite some time because they apparently got the demand letter but not my medical records. From there, they needed 60 days to investigate to see what they could find to deny liability, which was nothing.
However, my case is a very tricky one and my Attorney said that from the beginning, yet, he still decided to take my case. It was a slip and fall in a drinking establishment where I slipped and fell into a drink on the floor that was not cleaned up resulting in me breaking my wrist and getting plates and screws. I wasn't aware that I broke it until the next morning as at the time of the incident, it felt like a sprain.
The first offer we received was last week on the 8th which was $44K, the cost of only my medical bills before insurance. When my Attorney presented the offer, he kept saying how pleased he was with that offer considering the difficulty of my case. My argument was while the offer is great, it's the first low ball offer they're giving and his initial demand was $150K. He immediately goes into how that's an inflated number for him to be able to negotiate and that I'll never see that number (which is BS in my eyes because why ask me if $150K is a good number to shoot for in the demand)? I said, well.. okay... hearing both sides, how about halfway at $75K? He said he doubts I'll see double my medical bills and that I need to think about how this would look in court in front of a judge and 6 jurors if we had to file a lawsuit. Their argument is they have no surveillance footage, no employee recalls the incident, and that I didn't report it when it happened. He then said he'd go back and negotiate by coming down from the $150K by like $40K to see what they'd offer.
Am I wrong for turning down the $44K offer? He said that once all fees and their winning is taken out (35% + whatever other fees due to being a contingency case), I'd have $22K in my pocket. Sure, that's $22K extra I never had but I always read to not settle for the first offer. Now, I'm afraid since they know my deadline is in 2 weeks that they will drag their feet and continue to lowball backing me into the corner of either accepting their offer or filing a lawsuit.
What are your thoughts and weigh in here?

Previously I had been paying these taxes through my bank, lumped in with my mortgage payments. They stopped doing that for some reason, so this is my first year paying them on my own.
I just got my first statement. I owe a couple grand, damn, but oh look, there's a Tax Instalment Payment Plan!...
Except the TIPP started in January, before anyone has even received their tax statement for the year. And if you want to join part way through the year you have to pay a 2% fee.
Oh and they have to receive a paper document (can't submit online) by the 15th (in 2 days) in order to start the TIPP for the next month, which is when the taxes are due.
So I have to either drain my chequing account to pay the lump sum, or hope by some miracle a letter gets to the city and processed in 2 days to start my TIPP by next month.
Sure seems like this system is designed to funnel people towards lump sum payments and/or additional fees. I for one am not a fan.

We moved into a new house a couple of months ago. Closing date March 15th 2024. Our roof passed inspection but there were indications we'd need to replace it in the next 1-2 years.
Our insurance sent out their inspectors 2 weeks after close.
19 days LATER, on April 17th (to be clear, 19 days after the insurance company did their own inspection) we were informed by our agent that we'd need to get a new roof and be under contract by May 13th. I clarified "do we need a new roof by May 13th?" I was assured that no, we did not need a new roof by that date, just a plan in place.
Last week we were informed that agent is not with the company anymore, and that she was wrong. Our roof needed to be installed, inspected, and approved by underwriting prior to May 13th. We are scheduled to have our new roof installed this week.
Then late last week (Friday May 10th), we got a check in the mail. Our insurance company issued a refund check for our premium, dated April 16th, the day before we got the call from our insurance that we would need a new roof.
We NEVER received a notice in writing from our insurance company that our policy was being terminated. In our state (NC), I believe the law states notice must be given 15+ days prior to termination.
Our insurance company stated that they sent a letter, but I have USPS informed delivery, and we have had three pieces of mail from the insurance company since moving in, and I can account for all three of them. There is no written notice. They did not send it to our old address. I have an email from the insurance company stating they issued a notice in writing, to our new address, but the timeline does not work out. They sent our refund check the day before we got a call that we needed a new roof.
It seems like maybe the national and local office miscommunicated, and their representative who was working with us got the details wrong, but the worst part to me is that we did not receive written notice and I believe they are being dishonest in stating they sent written notice. That seems to be the most clear breach of the law, to me.
We do not have an attorney, but I think we need legal help for this matter. Thanks for any assistance.

Hey everyone.
So I viewed a condo on May 1, 2024. I put in an offer the next day, for 5% as I am a first time home buyer. I offered the asking price of $169,900, with a $5000 deposit. The conditions were to have the property pass a property inspection at my cost, the $5000 deposit received by May 8th (which it was), baseboards painted and installed prior to the closing day, financing approved by May 24, approval of my cats by May 17, the condo documents were to be received by May 10, 2024, with my agreement and review by May 17.
My mortgage broker sent in an application for mortgage insurance, which was denied by the insurer, so I went in with 20% down.
By May 10, a few condo documents were received, but they were not complete condo documents. So my realtor kept asking for the complete condo documents. We sent in a request for extension today, including the extension on the condo docs for May 17, buyer to review by May 24, and financing secure by May 24.
I was told the realtor advised her client not to sign for the extension. They have two other showings happening this week, and they want to see what the offers will be for those viewings before they agree to anything else.
My question is: is this a breach of contract? Can I complain to the RECA about this? Should I contact a lawyer? I really really wanted this condo and I am shocked that this is happening. This has to be illegal right?

Hello,
I was laid off in September. I’ve been unable to get any interviews except one in all of that time. Thankfully, it seems they want to hire me. However, the offer is pending them talking to my last job. They have been contacted multiple times and set up times to speak, but haven’t actually answered the calls.
As a part of my lay off, I had a “you can’t talk shit about me” reference clause put into my severance agreement as a response to their “you can’t talk shit about us” clause. It was essentially stating that they would give a non-negative reference if contacted for one. Them not giving this reference could cost me this offer. Do I have any legal grounds here to enforce the severance letter? What would damages even be, if I wanted to sue for breach of contract? I’m approximately a month away from eviction/bankruptcy so I’m desperate.
This is also the second or third? time they’ve violated the severance, including cutting off my insurance two months early and not giving me access to Cobra and also telling the state I was fired for misconduct instead of the truth that I was laid off, almost stopping me from being able to collect unemployment (another clause in the severance was that they would not take actions to stop me from getting unemployment but they sort of tried). So clearly they think they’re covered in some way.
NJ, in case it’s relevant.

Quick and Dirty: So long as you get Pep Talk by completing the first four dream quests, AND install Ye Olde Chemicker on Plunkett Street, you can get 15/15/15 on day 6 and beat the Ocean City Boardwalk games (Dream Cat not required). The rough outline: You get +2/+2/+2 from Ocean City perks and Charlestown State Pen perks, +1/+1/+1 from any number of hat and pants combos, +1/+1/+1 from the Monster Club sash, +1/+1/+1 from a Noble Elixir from Ye Olde Chemicker, +1/+1/+1 from the devil's food cake (throw a hot link down the H***hole), +1/+1/+1 from your choice of liquor and your bonus from the electrified orb, +1/+1/+1 from your Pep Talk perk and choice of cat, +1 to Moxie from a new set of teeth, +1 to Muscle from Chiropractic, +1 to mysticality from the statue of you, +1/+1/+1 from losing and getting Angry, Contemplative, and Aloof effects.
Beating the Ocean City Boardwalk games requires a minimum of 15/15/15 Mus/Mys/Mox stats. This is missable--it is possible to lock yourself out of being able to achieve such high stats. However, there are multiple ways to get your M-stats this high, meaning even if you miss one route to 15/15/15, another is likely still open. I wanted to make a quick guide about not only how to purely maximize stats, but the different options available to get yourself to 15/15/15.

Always Possible Stat Boosts

On any save file, 13/13/13 should be achievable. Here's how:

• +1/+1/+1 from Basic Humanity
• +4/+4/+4 from Skill Upgrades
• +1 Muscle from "St. Polycarp's Forehead" perk (St. Polycarp's Cathedral quest)
• +1 Mysticality from "Skeptical" perk (pay for a tarot reading three times at Ocean City Boardwalk)
• +1 Moxie from "Expert Sitter" perk (Marvin's quest)

Those, which I assume most folks who made it through chapter 1 know about, bring you to 6/6/6. Potions, alcohol, and food will also easily net you +1, +1, +2 to your choice of stats (you can get higher boosts from food and potions, but they are unique and/or missable), bringing you to around 7/8/7. Then:

• +1/+1/+1 from wearing the completed Monster Club sash accessory (complete all Monster Shack quests). To my knowledge, it is impossible to lock yourself out of this quest.
• +1 Moxie from the "Perfect Teeth" perk (the dentist at the Maize Maze in Gray County)
• +1/+1/+1 from giving prisoners Chiropractor gift certificates (Charlestown State Pen in Government Valley)
• +1 Muscle from the "Well Adjusted" effect using the same gift certificate for yourself

This brings us to 10/10/10. To get to 13/13/13:

• A hat and pants combo can get you +1/+1/+1 any playthrough. The intimidating Stetson from Haim Quarry in The Big Moist with S.I.T. kitchen britches from the S.I.T. gift shop) is the earliest available combo, but you can also combine any puckwudgie hat from Gray County with the corresponding S.I.T. pants from the S.I.T. gift shop). There's also the glorious tiara from the Wreck of the Longerfellow, which is difficult to reach.
• The electrical orb on your bookshelf from Radio Shack in The Big Moist grants +1 to your class' main stat when you touch it.
• The statue of you from Puckwudgie Village and one of the three M-stat cats (not counting the dream cat) can grant you +1 to an additional 2 M-stats
• Finally: Losing battles (NOT surrendering!) will grant you Angry), Contemplative, and Aloof effects for an additional +1/+1/+1.

So, this will get you to +13/+13/+13 fairly hassle free. But that still leaves us 6 points shy of victory. Thankfully, there are myriad ways to reach that final number (and beyond)

Bridging the final +6 gap

All of the following is content you can lock yourself out of, sometimes pretty easily, sometimes pretty early in the game. The good news is, there are so many options, it's likely a path to 15/15/15 still exists on your save file unless you've reached the very late game and aren't lucky.

Dreams

You can get an additional +4 from Dream-related events.

• The Dream Cat from the Prologue grants +1/+1/+1, for an additional +2 M-stats compared with the other M-stat cats. They are very missable, and you can permanently lose their boon if you pet another cat on Chapter 6, as you will not go to sleep again.
• You must complete quests in your first four dreams to get the perk Pep talk, granting +1 to 2 of your 3 M-stats. You choose the M-stats by picking which statue to silence in Yet Another Fitful Dream.

Clothing

• The giant maggot hat, which comes from helping the miners and NOT working with Frogger at Haim Quarry, gives +1/+1/+1 for an additional +1 M-stat.
• Weathered Jeans can be bought from Advanced Pants on Day 4 if you choose it as an additional shop on Plunkett street. It grants +1 Muscle and +1 Moxie, and is the only pair of pants to provide +1 to more than 1 M-stat, for an additional +1 overall. You will only install 5 of the 9 possible stores on Plunkett street during a playthrough, making it easy to miss this shop.

This makes for a maximal +2 from better clothes.

Food

There are a number of food options to grant more than +1 to your M-stats, granting a maximal additional +2 to your M-stats overall.

• Any food starting with H can be thrown in The H***hole in Gray County to make devil's food cake, for +1/+1/+1. Of particular interest are hot links, which can be crafted at arcane ovens from the infinitely abundant phlogistic resin. This is always available in any save file, but easily missed.
• The Dauphin House) in The Big Moist contains a Can of Fruit Cocktail for +1/+1/+1. This item is unique.
• Fruit Advertisements can be gotten from Junk Mail once you've gotten the letter opener on day 6. They give +1/+1/+1 when eaten.
• Fish sandwiches can be bought from Fission Chips or The Underground Restaurant) for +1 to 2 M-stats of your choice (suboptimal, but available starting day 3)
• Finally, picking Botany as a major opens up 2 interesting options for an additional (suboptimal) +1 to your M-stats: You can make a questionable salad at Professor Kalos' Holiday Home which grants +1 to Muscle and Mysticality when eaten, AND you can wander at S.I.T. with Barker to find Odd Fruit for +1 to Muscle and Moxie.

Potions

Potion options are comparatively limited, but can grant an additional +2.

• The Noble Exlixir (+1/+1/+1) will be sold at Ye Olde Chemicker if you install it on Plunkett Street, but ONLY on day 6. You will only install 5 of the 9 possible stores on Plunkett street during a playthrough, making it easy to miss this shop.
• If you take the Chemicals major at S.I.T., you can get Professor Adams as a companion. Talking to him at Ye Olde Chemicker will give you 3 of Professor Adams' special potions for +1/+1/+1. This can only be done once, but can get you +1/+1/+1 potions before day 6.
• Without Ye Olde Chemicker, you can find radium rouge at the Dauphin House in The Big Moist for +1 to Mysticality and Moxie (suboptimal). This item is unique.

Other

There are a couple unique effects that you can use which will last 1 day only

• At The Old Junkyard at Crystaldream lake, there's a tub you can soak in for +1/+1/+1 for the rest of the day. This is a one day only effect; you can only soak once and will not be able to soak any other day. Optimal to soak on day 6.
• Similarly, in Gray County, you can encounter a blob of crude oil surrounded by electrified shale spires. If you choose the option "Harness the Lightning [7 Mysticality] you get +1 Mysticality from the Fossil Fueled effect for the rest of the day. This option can only be chosen once; the event can occur many times, but once you choose to harness lightning, it will never happen again (optimal to do so on day 6).
• Finally, the exploit: You can get +3/+3/+3 if you choose spiders as an elective at S.I.T. I don't recommend it, but it's there.

Bonus Guide to Liquors

-Tequila grants +1 to Muscle and Mysticality and can be found in the Mob Submarine in The Big Moist, but only if you accept the Mob's offer on day 2. - Whiskey grants +1 to Muscle and Moxie and can be found in the Moonshiner's Cave in The Big Moist. - Absinthe grants +1 to Mysticality and Moxie and is found in Rufus' Lab) at S.I.T.
Shoutout to this previous post by u/Mr_Lisreal, which already covers most of what's in this post. My motivation behind making this was primarily that the wiki does not do a good job of displaying potion effects in a browsable way, and it wasn't clear to me if it was possible to completely box yourself out of being able to complete the boardwalk games (to my eye it appears possible, but uncommon). I also wanted a guide out there for freaks like me who enjoy petting cats, and therefore don't want to lean on the dream cat boon because it deprives you of the joy of petting all the other cats in the game.

Any places where I can cut? Trane Quotes?
I have two Trane quotes from the same installer:
S9X1 95% Single Stage Furnace XR14 14.3 Seer 2 AC T6 Honeywell Thermostat $10000 Cash
S9X2 96% Furnace (2 stage. Quote says single stage but think its a typo) XR16 Seer 2 Two Stage AC T6 Honeywell Thermostat $12,400 Cash
Same installer with 1 year labor and I am purchasing 10 year labor warranty. Is there a less expensive two stage furnace I can use with the second option to cut the cost of this option? The budget is somewhat in between option 1 and option 2.
I have quotes from another installer for both Rheem and Lennox two stage systems for about $1200 less than option 2. I like both installers nearly equally and don't know if it is insulting to try to negotiate this installers price based on another quote(or if this installer has any "give in his price") so I thought I would at least see if it could be accomplished with a slightly less expensive two stage furnace.
I would go with him immediately, having a slight preference for Trane, if he would take $11000 for option 2 and also I would sign up for maintenance agreements, buy a humidifier, labor warranty, etc. Should I tell him that or not insult him and just move on and work with the other installer who is within budget in the first place?

Sorry… this is a bit if a stream of conciouness. (and probably too positive but…)
There are 2 devices in my lifetime where I had the need to “insta-buy”… meaning that using it meant I “got it” straight away and can see a future different to today. The first was a Tesla Model 3… the second Apple Vision Pro.
This surely is a view into the future. It is AR + VR disrupted in a way only Apple has the patience to execute … late-ish but in a way that shows they absolutely have a long term and deep commitment to a brand new platform… and get it. They have built a platform on which from day one everything you need to be able to do seems to be available. This really shows the real benefit of the core apple platforms and walled garden working to bring a V1 experience second to none in the VAR world.
I am simply amazed at how the UI just works, is responsive, and thought through as a platform. The iOS roots are there and it just works as you might expect. iPad apps and vision apps are great (for V1), the eye tracking and interaction model, again for a first go is just effortless.
The way it can be used without EVER taking it off - from the first use - shows that the Apple teams have deeply understood a use case for a brand new platform that within 10 years could be the natural way of using technology.
When these actually become apple glasses and get smaller the iPhone will be replaced… it might take 10 years but the vision and building blocks are all here.
I have worn these solidly now for 6 hours and was comfortable throughout.
Amazing that from now we have the Office Suite essentially native, so many existing apps available for iOS / iPadOS available and working is phenomenal. I remember the first days of the watch, the iPad and the Phone… this is actually pretty complete.
I just love the iris authentication … just seamless for me and I have 1-Password installed which works as advertised.
It is also amazing that in a text editor like Notes you can basically look at a letter click your fingers, and the text cursor appears there. Long hold of the fingers allows you to move the cursor around, a double click selects a word. A triple click gets you the iOS text selection options. None of this is perfect yet, but it is amazing to see and you can see the possibilities.
Can I also say that the personal Spatial Audio is my absolutely favourite, genius, and undersold feature…. no headphones required and great sound.
All in all just brilliant for a V1 product and it is so nice to see so many of the Apple technologies that have been released in recent years find their way into this product.
Now… back to the future.
For international users:
Don’t be afraid of buying in the US and taking it back home. I am from Australia and was very worried about the narrative from Apple on the risks. Basically you can setup and configure everything without a US Apple Store account. You do not need a US AppleID to get going.
It will be functional and useable and only the apps that rely on region-locked services will not work … AppStore, Music, TV. This might seem like a killer but so much actually works including iCloud syncing and files etc that are based around your own account.
In a month or so (June 10 likely) it will be released in more markets and it will start working with your local AppleID.
If you can get a US AppleID then you can actually use Apple services which then work and remember your settings and playlists from your home territory… including Disney+, Apple Store, Apple Music etc.
I got a US AppleID by CHANGING THE REGION of one of my old less-used AppleIDs. This involved getting a US SMS service based on SlySMS which is the critical step. Every other avenue based on creating a new AppleID seemed to get blocked at one stage or another.

I am in a pickle with my employer. I work in an at-will state. I interviewed for a 2nd shift position and in the interview the supervisor stated that she no longer has access to pay information and shift differentials and that I could get that info and negotiate my salary with the recruiter from the corporate office. She said she believed differential was $1, but to confirm with the recruiter because it may have changed since she was in charge of that and only he would have access to that info, but she would also be contacting him to offer me the job. I contacted the recruiter that day who told me the differential is actually $2.75 per hou$3.75 per hour for weekends.
I should have asked for it to be in the offer letter, but when I accepted the position the offer letter it only stated my base hourly pay + "all other payroll and differentials to be paid per company policy." I have worked other evening shift jobs where the differential info was attached separately or not stated on the offer letter at all. I wasn't that worried since I had confirmed with the recruiter over the phone as requested and the supervisor confirmed he would be the only one who could give that info to me. I was training during the day shift so when I got my first evening paycheck I noticed the differential is $1. I contacted HR who told me to contact my supervisor to correct it through payroll. Turns out, the recruiter told me the incorrect amount.
My supervisor and HR rep have confirmed that this recruiter has frequent errors. They also acknowledged that he told me the wrong amount and they wished they could correct it, but because I make the highest pay in the hourly range of this position they cannot raise my base salary to reflect what I was offered. So they would change it if was making lower than that amount...when I said that is unacceptable they informed me I can no longer speak with them about this issue and "HR does not do meetings about wages." They want me to wait until the recruiter gets back next week from vacation so the chief of HR can speak with him to hear his side of the story and then after that she will have a meeting with my supervisor. They informed me I am not allowed to be a part of that meeting. I have also asked for the policy in writing that the differential is $1 to add to my personnel file to prevent any further confusion and they are unable to provide it - they told me payroll enters my location and the evening paycode in the software generates $1, but they don't actually have that info anywhere else. WTF!
All of this is documented in emails back and forth, except for my initial conversation accepting the job. Would I have any recourse for this? I realize it's not an employment contract and it was a verbal agreement, but I believe I in good faith accepted an accurate offer and multiple people have already acknowledged the mistake.
I do have a time-stamped phone call from the recruiter and a text message to my partner 1 minute later stating I would be accepting the job with a $2.75 shift differential. I quit another job and turned down a different job offer to take this one and have records that I had been applying to about 25-30 other jobs that month. I made more money in my other job, but it was causing me unnecessary stress and anxiety and I decided slightly lower pay and similar (but not as comprehensive) benefits would be better for my mental health. Now I am being paid $1.75 less per hour than I agreed to and I would have declined and stuck it out at the other job until something better came along. When negotiating pay, I had told my recruiter how much money I made at the other job and stated I wanted to get as close to that as possible based on my experience and now I feel like he lied about pay to get me to accept this job.

• Lesson video

INTRO

Today you'll install a common server application - the Apache2 web server - also known as httpd - the "Hyper Text Transport Protocol Daemon"!
If you’re a website professional then you might do things slightly differently, but our focus with this is not on Apache itself, or the website content, but to get a better understanding of:

• application installation
• configuration files
• services
• logs

YOUR TASKS TODAY

• Install and run apache, transforming your server into a web server

INSTRUCTIONS

• Refresh your list of available packages (apps) by: sudo apt update - this takes a moment or two, but ensures that you'll be getting the latest versions.
• Install Apache from the repository with a simple: sudo apt install apache2
• Confirm that it’s running by browsing to http://[external IP of your server] - where you should see a confirmation page.
• Apache is installed as a "service" - a program that starts automatically when the server starts and keeps running whether anyone is logged in or not. Try stopping it with the command: sudo systemctl stop apache2 - check that the webpage goes dead - then re-start it with sudo systemctl start apache2 - and check its status with: systemctl status apache2.
• As with the vast majority of Linux software, configuration is controlled by files under the /etc directory - check the configuration files under /etc/apache2 especially /etc/apache2/apache2.conf - you can use less to simply view them, or the vim editor to view and edit as you wish.
• In /etc/apache2/apache2.conf there's the line with the text: "IncludeOptional conf-enabled/*.conf". This tells Apache that the *.conf files in the subdirectory conf-enabled should be merged in with those from /etc/apache2/apache2.conf at load. This approach of lots of small specific config files is common.
• If you're familiar with configuring web servers, then go crazy, setup some virtual hosts, or add in some mods etc.
• The location of the default webpage is defined by the DocumentRoot parameter in the file /etc/apache2/sites-enabled/000-default.conf.
• Use less or vim to view the code of the default page - normally at /vawww/html/index.html. This uses fairly complex modern web design - so you might like to browse to http://165.227.92.20/sample where you'll see a much simpler page. Use View Source in your browser to see the code of this, copy it, and then, in your ssh session sudo vim /vawww/html/index.html to first delete the existing content, then paste in this simple example - and then edit to your own taste. View the result with your workstation browser by again going to http://[external IP of your server]
• As with most Linux services, Apache keeps its logs under the /valog directory - look at the logs in /valog/apache2 - in the access.log file you should be able to see your session from when you browsed to the test page. Notice that there's an overwhelming amount of detail - this is typical, but in a later lesson you'll learn how to filter out just what you want. Notice the error.log file too - hopefully this one will be empty!

Note for AWS/Azure/GCP users

Don't forget to add port 80 to your instance security group to allow inbound traffic to your server.

• AWS
• Azure
• GCP

POSTING YOUR PROGRESS

Practice your text-editing skills, and allow your "classmates" to judge your progress by editing /vawww/html/index.html with vim and posting the URL to access it to the forum. (It doesn’t have to be pretty!)

SECURITY

• As the sysadmin of this server, responsible for its security, you need to be very aware that you've now increased the "attack surface" of your server. In addition to ssh on port 22, you are now also exposing the apache2 code on port 80. Over time the logs may reveal access from a wide range of visiting search engines, and attackers - and that’s perfectly normal.
• If you run the commands: sudo apt update, then sudo apt upgrade, and accept the suggested upgrades, then you'll have all the latest security updates, and be secure enough for a test environment - but you should re-run this regularly.

EXTENSION

Read up on:

• Using systemctl to manage services

RESOURCES

• HTTPD - Apache2 Web Server
• The Apache HTTP Server

TROUBLESHOOT AND MAKE A SAD SERVER HAPPY!

Practice what you've learned with some challenges at SadServers.com:

• "Cape Town": Borked Nginx

PREVIOUS DAY'S LESSON

• Day 6 - Editing with "vim"

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