This is a really long story with lots of context so I'll do my best to organize it into current situation, then his backstory and hers. I'm also not using real names or specific locations for any of this to try and keep this private. This also has some contradicting stories and because of how their relationship is structured relies mostly on information I have gotten from my sister, so I'm telling you the story I got from her first and then adding in what I've found out. I'll try to tell this as unbiased as I can but it's been a huge issue in my family for a long time now and that's a little difficult for me to do.
My sister (Olivia, 24F) has been dating this guy (Trevor, 25M) since 2021. When they started dating, she talked about him fairly often, sent a few pictures of them, ect., but then after a month she stopped mentioning him/ was cagey when we (me and my mom mostly) asked how he was so we assumed it just hadn't worked out. Then two months later she insisted that my parents and I all come to visit her college to meet Trevor before he went into the Army (she lived several hours away from my parents and several hours from my college, so I had to get a bus ticket and my parents had to get a hotel room to do this. We only met him once for dinner). Now they've been dating long distance for three years after a three month in-person relationship. She is in nursing school and is planning on moving across the country (literally opposite corners of the map) to live with him and is not applying to any residency programs outside of the Army base area (limiting her choices a LOT from her original goals and narrowing employment opportunities).
Olivia met Trevor on several dating apps, matched with him, but didn't really want to go out with him. He was really persistent, so her friend convinced her to go out with him. She lied about the way they met to our parents and told them they met at the gym through a mutual friend (she lied to me about this at first too and told me the truth about 3 months after they started dating). At the time, Trevor was working as a used car salesman and living at home (~45 min. away from Olivia's school in a rural area) because his sports scholarship had been dropped before his Senior year due to covid at the college he had been attending out of state. The university was unaccredited (I later did some internet stalking and found out it was accredited), so his credits would not transfer and he would have to start over. He was saving up money to attend school in state at the large college Olivia attended so he could go back to school. **Our state has crazy low tuition costs in-state and a full-tuition scholarship program for good high school GPA and SAT scores. There was also a "feeder" community college that had half the cost per credit hour that a lot of people would go to before the larger university if they didn't get in straight out of high school.**
Olivia told me that Trevor had applied to her college and not gotten in (she later told me he HAD gotten in but been unable to afford tuition). Either way, he decided to join the Army because his father had been in the Army. The Army would take his credit hours and he would be able to finish his degree during his 5 year contract or use the GI bill once he got out. **She is comparing the situation to our father, who joined the Army directly out of high school and used the GI bill to go to college after his 2 year contract because his parents wouldn't pay for school. He was a medic in the military, worked as an EMT through college, and then went to nursing school.** The original plan was that Trevor would be a Green Beret (special forces), he completed basic training and and got several months through training and moved to the secondary base in NC before failing the running portion of a physical by about 10 seconds and being dropped from the selection process. He then decided that he wanted to be a Ranger (another elite position). He got sent back to GA, then to the Ranger school base in WA (it took a couple of months before he was sent to WA). Again, he got partway through the training before failing the running portion of a physical by a few seconds. He is now not sure if he will be continuing Ranger school (failing the physical means no, but commanders may pass him anyways if they think he should continue). For a while, Trevor told Olivia that he might not stay at the base in WA if he wasn't in Ranger school and there were a variety of different bases he could be sent to, including somewhere in Italy, so she wasn't sure where to look for jobs. In the past month, Trevor told Olivia that he would likely stay in WA regardless of the Ranger school results.
Through this all, Olivia has visited Trevor at the different military bases countless times, driving from as far as south FL to NC and putting over 30,000 miles on a brand new car over the course of the 1.5 years she's owned it. Before she had the car, she paid for plane tickets to see him and hotels whenever she visited. At the time, she told me that he was paying for all of these trips because he was unable to visit her, was making an income that wasn't being spent, and she was working to save for nursing school and later was living off of student loans and savings during nursing school. She later admitted to me that she had paid for almost all of the expenses except for food when they ate out together and part of a hotel room one weekend.
A few odd things (to me) between Olivia and Trevor over the course of their relationship:
About a month into their relationship, Trevor got Olivia an over $300 christmas gift. He has not gotten her anything nearly that expensive since, and hasn't sent flowers for things like her college graduation or a severe emergency surgery she had last year. I don't care about monetary value or sending flowers, but I do think it is odd that he spent so much before moving away when he ostensibly didn't have much money, but now that he has an income and military sign-on bonus, he has not spent that much again.
Trevor's father left Trevor, his siblings, and his mother, but Trevor has a hat that his father gave him that he wore often. The hat says "Red Man" across the top of a picture of a Native American man wearing a feathered headdress. He has worn this hat several times around Olivia's friends and they told him they didn't like it and that it was racist. They also asked him to not wear it when he was with them and he refused because it was special to him and his father gave it to him. Olivia then told him to stop wearing it and he eventually agreed (Olivia told me that he stopped wearing the hat after this). A few weeks after this, I facetimed Olivia and Trevor was with her. She turned the camera so I could say hello to him, and he was wearing the hat. I talked to Olivia about this later and she told me that that was the first time he'd worn the hat in a while and it wasn't a big deal. Olivia has always been liberal and never racist, and I am uncomfortable that she was okay with him not only wearing the hat, but being with him while he had it on.
They dated for a little over 3 months in person before he joined the military (recently, Olivia told me that they actually met several months before she told everyone about him and that they actually dated for 6 months before he left). For the next two months in basic training, he was only able to use the phone for 15 minutes total once a week to talk to family and her. Throughout the different training programs he has completed he had sporadic and limited access to phones to communicate, and only in the past 6 months he has had access to his phone to facetime, text, and call (but sometimes he goes for a week or two without phone access). Olivia told me that they wrote letters during the time he didn't have consistent phone access. **I don't think that this is odd, I understand the military limits phone usage, etc., but I don't think they have been able to have an "average" long-distance relationship**
Last year, Olivia drove to GA to visit Trevor the weekend before Valentine's day. He had plans for them to take a pottery class, go on a hike, and have dinner at a nice restaurant. The day she got there, Trevor's barracks had their off-base privileges revoked because one of the guys had contraband. She would still be able to visit him on base though. Somehow, Trevor was able to get off base for long periods of time to her hotel, but unable to do the other activities he had planned for them.
In the past year, Olivia told me that she and Trevor were going to immediately marry when she got to WA so that they could move in together because they had to be married to live together anywhere. I and our dad- who was in the military- told her several times that this was not true, but she insisted it was. Then, his barracks were given an allowance to live off base in apartments because the barracks were being renovated/ rebuilt, so she backed off on the idea of getting married immediately after several long conversations with me. She is still insistent on moving in with Trevor, who lives with a roommate, when she moves to WA.
Some background on Olivia:
Olivia has ADHD and anxiety, and struggled particularly badly with the anxiety/ some depression after being broken up with by the boyfriend she dated before Trevor (he broke it off very abruptly, told her he just didn't love her anymore with no previous indications). Olivia is very pretty (objectively, not just because she's my sister), but had bad acne that she ended up going on accutane for at the time she started dating Trevor and was very insecure about it. She had also decided to not go to medical school, and pursue nursing instead around the same time she met Trevor. This was a very upsetting decision for her because she had been taking very hard courses and was burnt out but had told everyone she was going to be a doctor and thought that she would be letting us down by switching paths. Also around the time she started seeing Trevor, Olivia began being very cruel towards our mother (our mother had been borderline emotionally abusive in the past, but Olivia and I were both in college by then and fixing our relationships with her. She has been much better recently and Olivia and I believe that she had some mental health struggles that went unchecked that contributed). Now, several years later, Olivia told our family that she had acted like that because she was rpd by a friend of her ex-boyfriend's after her ex broke up with her. This person also gave her an STD.
I always believe people who say they have been S A'd, and we believed Olivia when she first told us, but some things have come to light that make me and my family question that. Right after Olivia and her ex broke up, Olivia told our cousin that she had gone out with one of his friends and had revenge/ breakup sex with him because he had also been dumped recently. Once my cousin told me this, I remembered that Olivia had told me about a guy she had a one night stand with after she was dumped. She showed me a picture of him, talked about how cute he was, etc. (no distress whatsoever). I know sometimes people behave in ways you wouldn't expect when a traumatic event occurs to them, but I really don't understand how or why Olivia would brag about this guy if he really did S A her.
Three months ago, Olivia was arrested for stealing a set of sheets from Walmart (incidentally, right before Trevor came to visit her on leave). She used the self check-out and only bought a small $5 item and the sheets. She held both in one hand and scanned each side because she had a cut on the other hand and was holding her wallet with it. She saw a 5 in front of the total number and thought it looked right because the total should have been about $50, paid, didn't get a receipt, and walked out. An employee at the door asked to see a receipt, which Olivia didn't have, so she pulled up her transaction history on her phone to show she had paid. At this point, the employee called the police and took Olivia into an office, where she was questioned and charged with shoplifting. (Olivia can get very emotional and probably got upset when the police questioned her, which may have led them to believe she was lying). Luckily, Olivia has managed to get the charges expunged, but the process is still ongoing. Because of her ADHD, if anyone genuinely made this mistake, I would believe it from her, but Olivia has been improving a lot on organization and being more attentive recently. It is extremely uncharacteristic of her to steal- she was honest to a fault as kids- she would break down from guilt and admit things to our parents that we would have gotten away with if she hadn't said anything.
Right now, my parents have met Trevor twice in person, and I've met him once in person and several times in passing over facetime. I personally don't think that Trevor seems to keep up with my sister or that they make each other shine, and that opinion is shared with family friends and family that have met Trevor. Olivia doesn't mention Trevor in front of our parents often because his name has become a topic of contention and argument between them. My parents don't think Trevor is right for Olivia. She has almost 2 college degrees and plans to become a nurse practitioner in the future, and he hasn't finished college and doesn't seem to have any drive to do so. Olivia is also well traveled and enjoys going to museums, concerts, etc., while Trevor has lived in rural FL his whole life (this is not Trevor's fault, and I don't think he is a lesser person because of it, but I don't see a lot of common ground between them). Trevor has not seemed very well spoken when I have talked to him and I just don't see a lot of qualities in him that Olivia values.
If you've gotten this far, I just don't know what to do. Olivia and my parents have a huge rift in their relationship right now and any mention of Trevor, with her around or not, explodes into a huge argument, discussion, or just icy silence. I want Olivia to be able to talk to me about him, and we are able to discuss things much better than she is with our parents. My parents have also started asking me about Olivia and Trevor because they know Olivia shares more with me, and it makes me uncomfortable because I don't want to betray Olivia's trust, but I'm also very worried about her. I know I can't control her actions and I'm having a really hard time trying to balance supporting Olivia but not supporting the relationship (I'm not going to lie to her about how I feel, but I don't want her to feel alienated or unloved by our family, because that is NOT the case). I also think that Olivia is romanticizing the fact that our parents don't like him because my father's parents had a rift with him over our mother when we were very young (this is a whole other story, but basically, his parents always favored his sister, his sister got (I think) jealous when he did well for himself and married my mother, who his parents initially likes, and she made up rumors/lies about my mother that turned his parents against her (this was way before our mother's suspected mental health struggles, which occured when Olivia and I were in middle/high school).
Please share any thoughts you have on the situation (am I reading too into things, is this not as bad as I think it is?), and any advice you have on navigating the relationships.
Tl;dr My sister's boyfriend lied about the circumstances of him dropping out of college and joining the military. Now I think he's lying about not making it through training for two different special/ elite forces. My sister has significantly changed her behavior and I think she may have lied about a significant traumatic event to our family. Now she is planning on moving across the country to him and moving in immediately. Our entire family doesn't like him and we're worried about her. How do I support her but not her relationship?

I finished Gabriel's 10-week squat program on his app today. My back squat max before the program was 113 kg, and I hit 127 kg today. I weigh about 82 kg and have been weightlifting for 6 months. Overall, I liked the program and felt I was able to increase my PR by more than I had expected. The program was 10 weeks long, with 3 sessions a day, and each session took me around 2 hours to complete.
If you know Gabriel, then you know he loves volume. There were a lot of sets and reps, and there was a lot of waving in terms of load. I found the program to be challenging, and I even missed a couple of reps/sets along the way. But overall, it seemed pretty doable, and I never felt overwhelmed. I really liked the balance between all the exercises. Each session spent an equal amount of time on the classic lifts, back squats, and accessories. For every set and rep in the squats, there was an equal amount of work in accessories and other strength exercises like pulls and presses.
My favorite thing about the program was that it felt like it was building my whole body rather than just my quads. With the amount of work on hamstrings, lower back, and upper back, I always felt that the rest of my body was keeping up with my quads, and this focus on general strength kept me relatively injury-free. The biggest gain I noticed was not the 1RM strength but more the work capacity of my legs and the speed/rhythm of my squats. If I go back and watch my videos, I can see that the speed of my squats stayed relatively the same from 50% up to 90%+. I also felt that I had gotten much more explosive and started developing that signature Gabriel gunshot sound in my snatches and clean and jerks.
Regarding the Super Weightlifting app, I liked its build and functionality and felt all my needs were met. There is also a section in the app where you can post your lifting videos for form checks. I was able to get responses from Gabriel in less than 24 hours, even when he was traveling, and he would generally answer any follow-up questions on the same night. However, I feel you might have a different experience depending on your time zone.
All in all, I am happy with my progress, and I felt it was worth the money I paid. I will now be trying out his 5-day-a-week weightlifting program and probably do another squat cycle after that.
​

I just went to the ER with extreme pain radiating from my glute down to my foot, which had become somewhat numb. Got a shot of steroids in the ass and a prescription for muscle relaxants. Three hours later I am sleepy AF but still in large amounts of pain. What the heck? How long is it supposed to take until the steroid kicks in? One nurse said 30 min and another said a couple hours.
How do you sleep with this amount of pain?!

I am likely on my 3rd long cycle with a downward spiral regarding brain fog. It seems like I'm up for a few months and down for a few months. The down months are brutal. Compared to the brain fog I experienced right after infection, I can concentrate a bit better and perform some functions I couldn't before, but also feel like my brain is a lot more tired than before and can't concentrate for as long. It's as if my brain is wanting to shut down all day.
One of my milestones was being able to play a video game or two. I had been able to do that for months, but now I struggle with it yet somehow, I can try to study a little bit and retain a little bit of information where that was more difficult before.
The overall trend seems a tad up, but these cycles are destroying the hope I have when things seem to be getting better in general.

I recently re-attended my state assigned primary care physician after continuing to experience some debilitating symptoms.
I was referred out to several clinicians.
When I had the appointment for the cardiologist I was given the differential diagnosis of anxiety and long COVID. This doctor ordered a heart monitor and I wore it for 7 days.
During this time I visited an eds specialist who asked me questions on my history and performed some tests in office and determined that I have h-eds, pots, and mcas. This doctor prescribed some medicines that immediately started alleviating my most bothersome and constant symptoms.
The test results came back for the heart monitor with the statement that no symptomatic events were provided by the patient and that all signs looked healthy.
I sent a message to the cardiologist about the statement that I hadn't provided any symptomatic events during the 7 day period as I had included a print out with the information on what medicines I took, and the time, symptom and included activity for each time I felt an alarming sensation. I requested information on how that data correlates with what the heart monitor's results were and how I might mitigate those symptoms with or without the medication I was prescribed.
The cardiologist messaged me back and then called me to explain that he, nor his office had any access to that information or the results of the test and then explained that the diagnoses I received are a rash response to any patient.
On a personal level, I have avoided looking into the symptoms I exhibit or what illnesses or syndromes could be related to them as a means to avoid running into any sense of building a 'self-fulfilling prophecy', so to speak. After looking into these syndromes since seeing the specialist, I experience so many of these symptoms. The diagnosis seems to make sense...
In criterion 1 of the International Consortium on Ehlers-Danlos Syndromes and Related Disorders scoring rubric, I scored a 9/9 and on criterion 2 I scored a 7/12.
I don't know the history behind these disorders or anything more than the allusion that many of these syndromes are typically diagnosed in the western medical complex using an intentionally elaborate maze of flippant statements before finally arriving at the potentiality of a diagnosis of pots, mcas, and/or eds.
Is this cardiologist bothered that I obtained a diagnosis before I had paid out an amount of money to his practice?
Is the cardiologist pointing out reasonable flaws in the system and upset at the possibility of a misdiagnosis when anxiety can so easily fit the symptoms?
Is 15+ years of studying eds specifically, enough time to provide diagnoses to patients?
I read, (post dx) and was told by the diagnosing clinician that pots can take up to 10 years to diagnose and eds up to 15 years. The doctor looked at me and said, "You're not crazy. You have always had this. It's not just in your head, it's in your body too."
I feel upset that the heart monitor couldn't actually provide detailed data given that I had such a painful rash wearing it...
TLDR
I received a diagnosis and another doctor said he couldn't provide any data on the tests he performed but concluded that the diagnosis I received was faulty.

Tarot Reader since 2017 who has fully mastered in depth readings to bring true insight to the energies and circumstances you are dealing with, with the use of Oracle and Astrology as well. Shaneka's Services And Contact Linktree
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I got a call from my local Disability Determination office that my CDR exam with a psychologist was cancelled. But I hadn't received a letter or other notification that it was scheduled. I finished submitting my CDR forms a couple of months ago.
I called the employee back, and he said my CDR case is still going on. They might reschedule in the future, but they don't know when. My disability benefits will continue in the meantime. I asked if this might go on indefinitely, and he said yes.
I'm feeling nervous about all this, especially since I suffer from anxiety, social anxiety, mild depression, and low energy. I get easily stressed. Can I call back the employee and ask if I can not have a CDR exam, even if it's pretty far in the future? Any idea when it will be scheduled, if it will?
Can I just provide more information instead of going in for an exam? I hadn't been prescribed meds for mental health in while, since I got bad side effects, and I'm afraid I'll get more if I tried other meds. I'm concerned about the long-term effects of meds, too. Through the years, I've taken a long list of psychiatric meds, and they weren't helpful. Also, I hadn't seen any therapists or psychiatrists for a while, since they haven't been helpful, and they've been rude, hurtful, and condescending to me. They're often like that to patients they don't like, and I'm unlikeable due to a number of factors, including being a very stigmatized ethnicity in my area (and the world), and automatically seen as more unlikeable, less empathic, and less warm than other ethnicities.
I hadn't worked since getting disability about 11 years ago, except for sometime as a caregiver for my mother. I know about the SGA, but I couldn't even work other jobs to meet the SGA, ever. I'm a pretty severe case, though a lot of it is also severe stigmas against me, and how my ethnicity is bullied a lot more, with anxiety and a soft demeanor encouraging people to be rougher and nastier to me, making my life very painful and stressful whenever I have to interact with anyone. I'm unable to network, I have no friends or partner, I get severe anxiety for interviews, and I do poorly in interviews. And that's just the beginning - if I do get a job, I'm bullied endlessly because of shyness, anxiety, and a soft demeanor, in addition to my ethnicity often being bullied and looked down upon.
I was with the DOR on and off all these years, and got nowhere. That itself is proof of how I can't work. People generally are incredibly rude and condescending to me, so I can't get anywhere with people.
I suffer from ADHD-like issues as well, and haven't been able to do self-employment all these years, too.
In the past several years, I was very unsuccessful trying out community college for a few separate semesters, and couldn't finish or get past the first few class meetings, and was stuck with the fees.
I'm still in an online bootcamp, and have barely moved forward after being in it for almost a year, with some pauses and freezes. I had to switch mentors and advisers 3 times already because they were condescending, and I couldn't move forward with them. I also met with a career coach, she was rude as well, and I'm not seeing her again. I'm seen as shy and awkward, and that's magnified because my ethnicity seen that way, and generally looked down upon and poorly treated, with people feeling domineering instead of respectful, without the camaraderie they have towards people of other ethnicities.
Sorry about the longish post. What should I do? Should I call the employee back and explain some of this to avoid the CDR exam, if it's finally scheduled at some time? I'd feel nervous not knowing when it's scheduled, and it could be a long time later. Should I send additional information? This includes doing poorly with the latest hospital I was at (they barred me from going back), not getting anywhere with multiple counselors at DOR, not being able to complete or get anywhere at a community college (had to quit within a few class meetings), not getting anywhere in an online bootcamp, not having any friends/partner, and only interacting with my parents. Also, they know that I hadn't had any job at all other than being a caregiver for my mom for some time, and that stopped a couple of years ago. I never had any other jobs since getting on SSDI about 11 years ago, though I'm aware there's the SGA. I suffer from a lot of pain and anxiety due to being treated poorly, and people devaluing me. Life has been nightmarish for me.

I am in so much pain today.
On Friday May 10th as usual I was speaking with my friend through messenger like we did every single day for years now, we have lead pretty much the same life career wise,both in our 30s, only difference is he didn't want kids. Every little thing we talked about, even if we had nothing to say I would see a traffic jam in his area and I'd be concerned that he might get delayed by it or itd be annoying for him I would give him a heads up even if he already knew. ( I am a trucker and so was he).
These past months have been different I could never put my finger on it things were different we used to speak for hours on the phone up until 6 months ago, I left the industry the phone calls became more difficult to have because our schedules changed so significantly, and about 3 months ago they just stopped, I would try to reach him but he just wouldn't answer anymore. He would always respond to messages though, except for the weekend that's when we both disconnected the best we could from our phones to try to be more present with family, but during the week we each would have 13 to 17 hour long days at work and it was always nice to know someone was there if needed.
This brings me back to May 10th a day I will regret forever. It started with me getting to my truck ( I started driving again after the 6 months because I myself had a mental breakdown from it at the time and I've only been back for about a month) at roughly 330am and the dam thing had a electronic issue, sensor somehow got damaged after sitting there all weekend, I just casually message him complaint " oh it's going to be one of those days showed up and this happened (sent him pictures of my dash and error warnings that it was showing) and within minutes even being so early in the morning bam there he is " dam man that sucks, it's probably (offers all the knowledge he has which in fact was the right answer)" we joke around a bit, I get to take the day off paid now because the truck going to sit in a shop.
Later that day I'm sitting at home and I tell him the shop confirmed it he was right, he just responds with " my trucks engine blew today and finally after getting to the shipper I lost the bill of lading for my delivery and they were pissed". I respond with a "You win" the bad day contest that we seem to have had so many times before in the past.
Sometime passes an hour or so and he finally responds " I told (my wife) that I'm not going to her parents tomorrow (may 11) Im not dealing with this this weekend" ( his wife's dad was the owner of the company he runs a truck for) I agree with him say best not to bother with it (father in-law ) he will just blame you somehow even though nothing you could do about.
This is where I should have known something was wrong. A short time passes and all he says is "I'm done" I respond with " done for the day or some working for (father in-laws company)? He responded with "Just done" which then I immediately sent 2 responses of " days off are needed for sure" and " if you need to talk I'm here as usual"
Now being a Friday night we both do our disconnect from phones him always alot more dedicated to it then me, I usually see him pop online once or twice but nothing all weekend. Monday rolls around and I send him a good morning text just to start up our usual conversation, around noon I notice my message hasn't sent and he still isn't online, I go up to my wife with alot of dread and state there's something wrong with (my friend) I don't know what it is but I can feel it.
3 hours later his wife posts from his account that he had suddenly "passed" away on Saturday May 11th. I jumped out of my chair ran out side and just screamed, I haven't stopped randomly crying since I read the Facebook post, if only he has called, if only I pushed harder for him to speak to me, the more I think about the more I believe it's my fault, I knew about his past, I knew he had be going through new medications, this man was like a brother to me I could always rely on him and he could always rely on me I just wish he asked for help from me and I didn't weigh him down with my insignificant in comparison problems.
It's selfish but I just want to talk to him again. I don't want anything else at this point. These years have been so hard and he has saved me more then once I never got to return the favour in such a way

May 13, 2024 Training Log

• IKO K2 Kettlebell Sport Championship
• Jump rope: 10'
• Long Cycle:
  • 2x16,20,24KG: 10
  • 2x28KG: 2x8
  • 2x30KG: 8
  • 2x28KG: 10'
    • 8,8,8,8,8,8,8,8,9,11 (84 unofficial count)
• Tread: 25' (1.26mi @ 1% w/ 20lb vest)

Notes

• Video
• Set felt fine all things considered. This is a new PR for me with 28s in 10'.
• Between my knee locking out (twice), my back fairing up, and now my allergies have me consistently congested it's been a rough few weeks physically.
• But I think the forced delod the past week+ due to my back may have worked in my favor.
• Mentally I've been focusing on writing my mom's eulogy which just has me emotionally drained at the moment.

Can you imagine if you gave your boss excuse after excuse for not doing your job? How hard is it to edit a video and upload it? Yes life gets in the way but it’s literally your JOB. You work your schedule around your job. These two won’t last long with this work ethic, go back and get a real job with a routine because it’s clearly something you need.

I'm looking to buy a new laptop for uni and can't decide between these two...
For the Legion Slim 5 gen 9 at $1,839.99 CAD:
https://www.lenovo.com/ca/en/p/laptops/legion-laptops/legion-slim-series-laptops/lenovo-legion-slim-5-gen-9-(16-inch-amd)/83dh0042us/83dh0042us)

• Ryzen7 8845HS
• RTX 4070
• 1 TB SSD
• 16 gb of ram
• Display: 16" WQXGA (2560 x 1600), IPS, Anti-Glare, Non-Touch, 100%sRGB, 350 nits, 165Hz

For the Legion Pro 5 gen 8 at $1928 CAD:
https://www.lenovo.com/ca/en/configuratocto/index.html?bundleId=82WMCTO1WWCA1

• Ryzen7 7745HX
• RTX 4060 (could add 200 more bucks for 4070)
• 1 TB SSD
• 32 gb of ram
• display: 16" WQXGA (2560 x 1600), IPS, Anti-Glare, Non-Touch, HDR 400, 100%sRGB, 500 nits, 240Hz

Also, I am a bit worried about the battery life for them, is there any insights as to how long these actually last? I've seen videos saying slim 5 has a longer battery life.
Thanks in advance!

This is a really long story with lots of context so I'll do my best to organize it into current situation, then his backstory and hers. I'm also not using real names or specific locations for any of this to try and keep this private. This also has some contradicting stories and because of how their relationship is structured relies mostly on information I have gotten from my sister, so I'm telling you the story I got from her first and then adding in what I've found out. I'll try to tell this as unbiased as I can but it's been a huge issue in my family for a long time now and that's a little difficult for me to do.
My sister (Olivia, 24F) has been dating this guy (Trevor, 25M) since 2021. When they started dating, she talked about him fairly often, sent a few pictures of them, ect., but then after a month she stopped mentioning him/ was cagey when we (me and my mom mostly) asked how he was so we assumed it just hadn't worked out. Then two months later she insisted that my parents and I all come to visit her college to meet Trevor before he went into the Army (she lived several hours away from my parents and several hours from my college, so I had to get a bus ticket and my parents had to get a hotel room to do this. We only met him once for dinner). Now they've been dating long distance for three years after a three month in-person relationship. She is in nursing school and is planning on moving across the country (literally opposite corners of the map) to live with him and is not applying to any residency programs outside of the Army base area (limiting her choices a LOT from her original goals and narrowing employment opportunities).
Olivia met Trevor on several dating apps, matched with him, but didn't really want to go out with him. He was really persistent, so her friend convinced her to go out with him. She lied about the way they met to our parents and told them they met at the gym through a mutual friend (she lied to me about this at first too and told me the truth about 3 months after they started dating). At the time, Trevor was working as a used car salesman and living at home (~45 min. away from Olivia's school in a rural area) because his sports scholarship had been dropped before his Senior year due to covid at the college he had been attending out of state. The university was unaccredited (I later did some internet stalking and found out it was accredited), so his credits would not transfer and he would have to start over. He was saving up money to attend school in state at the large college Olivia attended so he could go back to school. **Our state has crazy low tuition costs in-state and a full-tuition scholarship program for good high school GPA and SAT scores. There was also a "feeder" community college that had half the cost per credit hour that a lot of people would go to before the larger university if they didn't get in straight out of high school.**
Olivia told me that Trevor had applied to her college and not gotten in (she later told me he HAD gotten in but been unable to afford tuition). Either way, he decided to join the Army because his father had been in the Army. The Army would take his credit hours and he would be able to finish his degree during his 5 year contract or use the GI bill once he got out. **She is comparing the situation to our father, who joined the Army directly out of high school and used the GI bill to go to college after his 2 year contract because his parents wouldn't pay for school. He was a medic in the military, worked as an EMT through college, and then went to nursing school.** The original plan was that Trevor would be a Green Beret (special forces, linking the training pipeline here: https://www.reddit.com/greenberets/comments/xwdbta/current_sf_pipeline_correct_me_if_im_wrong/ ), he completed basic training and and got several months through the NC training before failing the running portion of a physical by about 10 seconds and being dropped from the selection process. He then decided that he wanted to be a Ranger (another elite position). He got sent back to GA, then to the Ranger school base in WA (it took a couple of months before he was sent to WA). Again, he got partway through the training before failing the running portion of a physical by a few seconds. He is now not sure if he will be continuing Ranger school (failing the physical means no, but commanders may pass him anyways if they think he should continue). For a while, Trevor told Olivia that he might not stay at the base in WA if he wasn't in Ranger school and there were a variety of different bases he could be sent to, including somewhere in Italy, so she wasn't sure where to look for jobs. In the past month, Trevor told Olivia that he would likely stay in WA regardless of the Ranger school results.
Through this all, Olivia has visited Trevor at the different military bases countless times, driving from as far as south FL to NC and putting over 30,000 miles on a brand new car over the course of the 1.5 years she's owned it. Before she had the car, she paid for plane tickets to see him and hotels whenever she visited. At the time, she told me that he was paying for all of these trips because he was unable to visit her, was making an income that wasn't being spent, and she was working to save for nursing school and later was living off of student loans and savings during nursing school. She later admitted to me that she had paid for almost all of the expenses except for food when they ate out together and part of a hotel room one weekend.
A few odd things (to me) between Olivia and Trevor over the course of their relationship:
About a month into their relationship, Trevor got Olivia an over $300 christmas gift. He has not gotten her anything nearly that expensive since, and hasn't sent flowers for things like her college graduation or a severe emergency surgery she had last year. I don't care about monetary value or sending flowers, but I do think it is odd that he spent so much before moving away when he ostensibly didn't have much money, but now that he has an income and military sign-on bonus, he has not spent that much again.
Trevor's father left Trevor, his siblings, and his mother, but Trevor has a hat that his father gave him that he wore often. The hat says "Red Man" across the top of a picture of a Native American man wearing a feathered headdress. He has worn this hat several times around Olivia's friends and they told him they didn't like it and that it was racist. They also asked him to not wear it when he was with them and he refused because it was special to him and his father gave it to him. Olivia then told him to stop wearing it and he eventually agreed (Olivia told me that he stopped wearing the hat after this). A few weeks after this, I facetimed Olivia and Trevor was with her. She turned the camera so I could say hello to him, and he was wearing the hat. I talked to Olivia about this later and she told me that that was the first time he'd worn the hat in a while and it wasn't a big deal. Olivia has always been liberal and never racist, and I am uncomfortable that she was okay with him not only wearing the hat, but being with him while he had it on.
They dated for a little over 3 months in person before he joined the military (recently, Olivia told me that they actually met several months before she told everyone about him and that they actually dated for 6 months before he left). For the next two months in basic training, he was only able to use the phone for 15 minutes total once a week to talk to family and her. Throughout the different training programs he has completed he had sporadic and limited access to phones to communicate, and only in the past 6 months he has had access to his phone to facetime, text, and call (but sometimes he goes for a week or two without phone access). Olivia told me that they wrote letters during the time he didn't have consistent phone access. **I don't think that this is odd, I understand the military limits phone usage, etc., but I don't think they have been able to have an "average" long-distance relationship**
Last year, Olivia drove to GA to visit Trevor the weekend before Valentine's day. He had plans for them to take a pottery class, go on a hike, and have dinner at a nice restaurant. The day she got there, Trevor's barracks had their off-base privileges revoked because one of the guys had contraband. She would still be able to visit him on base though. Somehow, Trevor was able to get off base for long periods of time to her hotel, but unable to do the other activities he had planned for them.
In the past year, Olivia told me that she and Trevor were going to immediately marry when she got to WA so that they could move in together because they had to be married to live together anywhere. I and our dad- who was in the military- told her several times that this was not true, but she insisted it was. Then, his barracks were given an allowance to live off base in apartments because the barracks were being renovated/ rebuilt, so she backed off on the idea of getting married immediately after several long conversations with me. She is still insistent on moving in with Trevor, who lives with a roommate, when she moves to WA.
Some background on Olivia:
Olivia has ADHD and anxiety, and struggled particularly badly with the anxiety/ some depression after being broken up with by the boyfriend she dated before Trevor (he broke it off very abruptly, told her he just didn't love her anymore with no previous indications). Olivia is very pretty (objectively, not just because she's my sister), but had bad acne that she ended up going on accutane for at the time she started dating Trevor and was very insecure about it. She had also decided to not go to medical school, and pursue nursing instead around the same time she met Trevor. This was a very upsetting decision for her because she had been taking very hard courses and was burnt out but had told everyone she was going to be a doctor and thought that she would be letting us down by switching paths. Also around the time she started seeing Trevor, Olivia began being very cruel towards our mother (our mother had been borderline emotionally abusive in the past, but Olivia and I were both in college by then and fixing our relationships with her. She has been much better recently and Olivia and I believe that she had some mental health struggles that went unchecked that contributed). Now, several years later, Olivia told our family that she had acted like that because she was rpd by a friend of her ex-boyfriend's after her ex broke up with her. This person also gave her an STD.
I always believe people who say they have been S A'd, and we believed Olivia when she first told us, but some things have come to light that make me and my family question that. Right after Olivia and her ex broke up, Olivia told our cousin that she had gone out with one of his friends and had revenge/ breakup sex with him because he had also been dumped recently. Once my cousin told me this, I remembered that Olivia had told me about a guy she had a one night stand with after she was dumped. She showed me a picture of him, talked about how cute he was, etc. (no distress whatsoever). I know sometimes people behave in ways you wouldn't expect when a traumatic event occurs to them, but I really don't understand how or why Olivia would brag about this guy if he really did S A her.
Three months ago, Olivia was arrested for stealing a set of sheets from Walmart (incidentally, right before Trevor came to visit her on leave). She used the self check-out and only bought a small $5 item and the sheets. She held both in one hand and scanned each side because she had a cut on the other hand and was holding her wallet with it. She saw a 5 in front of the total number and thought it looked right because the total should have been about $50, paid, didn't get a receipt, and walked out. An employee at the door asked to see a receipt, which Olivia didn't have, so she pulled up her transaction history on her phone to show she had paid. At this point, the employee called the police and took Olivia into an office, where she was questioned and charged with shoplifting. (Olivia can get very emotional and probably got upset when the police questioned her, which may have led them to believe she was lying). Luckily, Olivia has managed to get the charges expunged, but the process is still ongoing. Because of her ADHD, if anyone genuinely made this mistake, I would believe it from her, but Olivia has been improving a lot on organization and being more attentive recently. It is extremely uncharacteristic of her to steal- she was honest to a fault as kids- she would break down from guilt and admit things to our parents that we would have gotten away with if she hadn't said anything.
Right now, my parents have met Trevor twice in person, and I've met him once in person and several times in passing over facetime. I personally don't think that Trevor seems to keep up with my sister or that they make each other shine, and that opinion is shared with family friends and family that have met Trevor. Olivia doesn't mention Trevor in front of our parents often because his name has become a topic of contention and argument between them. My parents don't think Trevor is right for Olivia. She has almost 2 college degrees and plans to become a nurse practitioner in the future, and he hasn't finished college and doesn't seem to have any drive to do so. Olivia is also well traveled and enjoys going to museums, concerts, etc., while Trevor has lived in rural FL his whole life (this is not Trevor's fault, and I don't think he is a lesser person because of it, but I don't see a lot of common ground between them). Trevor has not seemed very well spoken when I have talked to him and I just don't see a lot of qualities in him that Olivia values.
If you've gotten this far, I just don't know what to do. Olivia and my parents have a huge rift in their relationship right now and any mention of Trevor, with her around or not, explodes into a huge argument, discussion, or just icy silence. I want Olivia to be able to talk to me about him, and we are able to discuss things much better than she is with our parents. My parents have also started asking me about Olivia and Trevor because they know Olivia shares more with me, and it makes me uncomfortable because I don't want to betray Olivia's trust, but I'm also very worried about her. I know I can't control her actions and I'm having a really hard time trying to balance supporting Olivia but not supporting the relationship (I'm not going to lie to her about how I feel, but I don't want her to feel alienated or unloved by our family, because that is NOT the case). I also think that Olivia is romanticizing the fact that our parents don't like him because my father's parents had a rift with him over our mother when we were very young (this is a whole other story, but basically, his parents always favored his sister, his sister got (I think) jealous when he did well for himself and married my mother, who his parents initially likes, and she made up rumors/lies about my mother that turned his parents against her (this was way before our mother's suspected mental health struggles, which occured when Olivia and I were in middle/high school).
Please share any thoughts you have on the situation (am I reading too into things, is this not as bad as I think it is?), and any advice you have on navigating the relationships.

I got my kitten at 8 weeks. The first couple of day when I first got her she didn’t attack me at night but would always attack my legs/hands/arms/back/stomach anywhere really during the day. Through some research and youtube videos. I learned to stay calm and say a firm no and if it was painful would make a sound to show I was hurt along with facial expressions. Since then this has seemed to reduce the behavior during the day by a lot and she listens the first time most of the time. However for an entire week she has been waking me up. I think attention seeking my playing on the bed on top of me and when she wakes me up she will start pouncing on me aggressive anywhere but also my face especially if I try to sleep and my hair. My usual ways of disciplining does not work even if I make a sound that I am hurt but she does not growl or hiss so I know it is still play aggression I think. I do not know what to do. I have tried to redirect her attention but every time she will immediately come back on the bed and get more aggressive. I have tried leaving the room or moving away from her to show it’s not okay but has not worked. Before people comment I am a student and I do not have the means for getting a second kitty. Extra information I live in a studio room so there is just one room and only the bathroom is separate so I can not just put her to another room to sleep. Also idk if this is good but I thought i would always have boxes and toys out during the day and at night please let me know if I should get rid of toys after play time or keep specific ones.
I would also appreciate it if people could explain how to enforce positive enforcement like the timing with treats because I really do not understand and maybe I am doing it wrong.
Ps: during the day time ignoring seems to do the trick but not at night.

I (22F) was in a very abusive and toxic relationship for about 3 years. I was abused in every way possible. Every chance he had to make me feel bad about something that happened to me he took it for example I was raped as a child and teenager and when he got mad he would tell me that the guy must have been big because I was bleeding after the event rather than being their to comfort me. Because to him it wasn’t that fact that I was violently raped it’s just they had to be bigger than him. He triggered my trauma by touching me and inserting things into me while I slept not to mention when I would tell him no during sex and he’d still enter me. One time I remember most was when he tried to put it in the back door and I repeatedly said no but he did it anyway I was so hurt and scared that I just laid there until he realized that I wasn’t moving and rather than apologizing and making sure I’m okay he got upset and rolled over because I ruined the mood. Going back to the beginning we started dating in 2019 when I had turned 18 and he was 21. In 2020 he got me pregnant and one day he got unreasonably upset at me for worrying about where he was running off to in the middle of the night and told me “He’d make me lose our baby” and surely enough he kept true to his word and I did lose the baby I remember crying and begging him to comfort me but he was too busy playing the game and talking to his friend at some point he got annoyed with me crying so he left out the room. His actions beat my confidence down and every ounce of personality I had was taken from my very being and I was shell of who I once was by summer of 2021. I think once he saw that he figured that final blow would be to tell me that he fell in love with someone else and I cried but like a fool I still wanted him to comfort me but all he could do was look at me like I was beneath him. Once he chose her only two months in he realized the grass wasn’t greener on the other side and left her to come talk to me looking back on it now I know it was because I was easier to manipulate at the time. We got back together and by 2022 I thought maybe he changed his ways as I was noticing things he did at the beginning of our relationship and things I liked. But soon I would realize how wrong I was he became abusive again but by this point I felt like I had no one but him I had no one to talk to not even family. We had sex although I really didn’t enjoy it I just knew that was the only way I’d be able to keep him in my life and without him I had no one to ones surprise I got pregnant again I was sick and miserable the whole time by this point I started coming to my senses and gaining my sense of self back I knew I couldn’t be in this relationship or be tied to him by having this baby after talking to him and my parents we decided an abortion would be the best but afterwards I was too weak and in pain to travel back home so I stayed at his place until I had the energy to get back on my feet during this stay he got aggressive with me one night in September of 2022 I grabbed something to protect myself in case he came at me and in a rage he snatched it from me flipped me on the bed and punched me his hardest in my face I was bleeding according to his sisters and mom but I couldn’t feel my nose or mouth I just remember walking through the hallways and screaming that he hit me and then I was dragged back to his room where I felt myself fading in and out of consciousness no one called an ambulance no one checked on me I just remember waking up and seeing that while I was going through all the things he was putting me through he was on Reddit telling other girls how sexy they were or how pretty they looked. I like to say I’ve healed from it and I found someone better but from the things I’ve been through sometimes I find myself thinking peace and healing is not enough I need him to suffer like how he made me suffer.
Note: I did not include a lot of the times he hit me or spit on me because this post would be very long I just wrote the parts that were the most traumatic to me. Thank you for reading I just wanted to get this out.
Edit: sorry if this is written weird it’s sometimes very hard and upsetting to remember but I try to type as fast as I think.

hi everyone!
I am interning in sf this summer and my mom is helping me move in this week and will be staying with me for a couple days. However, she is disabled and can’t walk for very long without it causing her a lot of pain (which sucks since SF is a very walkable city). Was wondering if anyone had any tourist attractions or fun things to do in mind that didn’t involve a lot of walking around/ones that provide wheelchairs that she could enjoy! I have things on my bucket list for me, but I just want to be conscious of her needs. If you have any ideas for something fun we can do, please let me know!

This is a really long story with lots of context so I'll do my best to organize it into current situation, then his backstory and hers. I'm also not using real names or specific locations for any of this to try and keep this private. This also has some contradicting stories and because of how their relationship is structured relies mostly on information I have gotten from my sister, so I'm telling you the story I got from her first and then adding in what I've found out. I'll try to tell this as unbiased as I can but it's been a huge issue in my family for a long time now and that's a little difficult for me to do.
My sister (Olivia, 24F) has been dating this guy (Trevor, 25M) since 2021. When they started dating, she talked about him fairly often, sent a few pictures of them, ect., but then after a month she stopped mentioning him/ was cagey when we (me and my mom mostly) asked how he was so we assumed it just hadn't worked out. Then two months later she insisted that my parents and I all come to visit her college to meet Trevor before he went into the Army (she lived several hours away from my parents and several hours from my college, so I had to get a bus ticket and my parents had to get a hotel room to do this. We only met him once for dinner). Now they've been dating long distance for three years after a three month in-person relationship. She is in nursing school and is planning on moving across the country (literally opposite corners of the map) to live with him and is not applying to any residency programs outside of the Army base area (limiting her choices a LOT from her original goals and narrowing employment opportunities).
Olivia met Trevor on several dating apps, matched with him, but didn't really want to go out with him. He was really persistent, so her friend convinced her to go out with him. She lied about the way they met to our parents and told them they met at the gym through a mutual friend (she lied to me about this at first too and told me the truth about 3 months after they started dating). At the time, Trevor was working as a used car salesman and living at home (~45 min. away from Olivia's school in a rural area) because his sports scholarship had been dropped before his Senior year due to covid at the college he had been attending out of state. The university was unaccredited (I later did some internet stalking and found out it was accredited), so his credits would not transfer and he would have to start over. He was saving up money to attend school in state at the large college Olivia attended so he could go back to school. **Our state has crazy low tuition costs in-state and a full-tuition scholarship program for good high school GPA and SAT scores. There was also a "feeder" community college that had half the cost per credit hour that a lot of people would go to before the larger university if they didn't get in straight out of high school.**
Olivia told me that Trevor had applied to her college and not gotten in (she later told me he HAD gotten in but been unable to afford tuition). Either way, he decided to join the Army because his father had been in the Army. The Army would take his credit hours and he would be able to finish his degree during his 5 year contract or use the GI bill once he got out. **She is comparing the situation to our father, who joined the Army directly out of high school and used the GI bill to go to college after his 2 year contract because his parents wouldn't pay for school. He was a medic in the military, worked as an EMT through college, and then went to nursing school.** The original plan was that Trevor would be a Green Beret (special forces, linking the training pipeline here: https://www.reddit.com/greenberets/comments/xwdbta/current_sf_pipeline_correct_me_if_im_wrong/ ), he completed basic training and and got several months through the NC training before failing the running portion of a physical by about 10 seconds and being dropped from the selection process. He then decided that he wanted to be a Ranger (another elite position). He got sent back to GA, then to the Ranger school base in WA (it took a couple of months before he was sent to WA). Again, he got partway through the training before failing the running portion of a physical by a few seconds. He is now not sure if he will be continuing Ranger school (failing the physical means no, but commanders may pass him anyways if they think he should continue). For a while, Trevor told Olivia that he might not stay at the base in WA if he wasn't in Ranger school and there were a variety of different bases he could be sent to, including somewhere in Italy, so she wasn't sure where to look for jobs. In the past month, Trevor told Olivia that he would likely stay in WA regardless of the Ranger school results.
Through this all, Olivia has visited Trevor at the different military bases countless times, driving from as far as south FL to NC and putting over 30,000 miles on a brand new car over the course of the 1.5 years she's owned it. Before she had the car, she paid for plane tickets to see him and hotels whenever she visited. At the time, she told me that he was paying for all of these trips because he was unable to visit her, was making an income that wasn't being spent, and she was working to save for nursing school and later was living off of student loans and savings during nursing school. She later admitted to me that she had paid for almost all of the expenses except for food when they ate out together and part of a hotel room one weekend.
A few odd things (to me) between Olivia and Trevor over the course of their relationship:
About a month into their relationship, Trevor got Olivia an over $300 christmas gift. He has not gotten her anything nearly that expensive since, and hasn't sent flowers for things like her college graduation or a severe emergency surgery she had last year. I don't care about monetary value or sending flowers, but I do think it is odd that he spent so much before moving away when he ostensibly didn't have much money, but now that he has an income and military sign-on bonus, he has not spent that much again.
Trevor's father left Trevor, his siblings, and his mother, but Trevor has a hat that his father gave him that he wore often. The hat says "Red Man" across the top of a picture of a Native American man wearing a feathered headdress. He has worn this hat several times around Olivia's friends and they told him they didn't like it and that it was racist. They also asked him to not wear it when he was with them and he refused because it was special to him and his father gave it to him. Olivia then told him to stop wearing it and he eventually agreed (Olivia told me that he stopped wearing the hat after this). A few weeks after this, I facetimed Olivia and Trevor was with her. She turned the camera so I could say hello to him, and he was wearing the hat. I talked to Olivia about this later and she told me that that was the first time he'd worn the hat in a while and it wasn't a big deal. Olivia has always been liberal and never racist, and I am uncomfortable that she was okay with him not only wearing the hat, but being with him while he had it on.
They dated for a little over 3 months in person before he joined the military (recently, Olivia told me that they actually met several months before she told everyone about him and that they actually dated for 6 months before he left). For the next two months in basic training, he was only able to use the phone for 15 minutes total once a week to talk to family and her. Throughout the different training programs he has completed he had sporadic and limited access to phones to communicate, and only in the past 6 months he has had access to his phone to facetime, text, and call (but sometimes he goes for a week or two without phone access). Olivia told me that they wrote letters during the time he didn't have consistent phone access. **I don't think that this is odd, I understand the military limits phone usage, etc., but I don't think they have been able to have an "average" long-distance relationship**
Last year, Olivia drove to GA to visit Trevor the weekend before Valentine's day. He had plans for them to take a pottery class, go on a hike, and have dinner at a nice restaurant. The day she got there, Trevor's barracks had their off-base privileges revoked because one of the guys had contraband. She would still be able to visit him on base though. Somehow, Trevor was able to get off base for long periods of time to her hotel, but unable to do the other activities he had planned for them.
In the past year, Olivia told me that she and Trevor were going to immediately marry when she got to WA so that they could move in together because they had to be married to live together anywhere. I and our dad- who was in the military- told her several times that this was not true, but she insisted it was. Then, his barracks were given an allowance to live off base in apartments because the barracks were being renovated/ rebuilt, so she backed off on the idea of getting married immediately after several long conversations with me. She is still insistent on moving in with Trevor, who lives with a roommate, when she moves to WA.
Some background on Olivia:
Olivia has ADHD and anxiety, and struggled particularly badly with the anxiety/ some depression after being broken up with by the boyfriend she dated before Trevor (he broke it off very abruptly, told her he just didn't love her anymore with no previous indications). Olivia is very pretty (objectively, not just because she's my sister), but had bad acne that she ended up going on accutane for at the time she started dating Trevor and was very insecure about it. She had also decided to not go to medical school, and pursue nursing instead around the same time she met Trevor. This was a very upsetting decision for her because she had been taking very hard courses and was burnt out but had told everyone she was going to be a doctor and thought that she would be letting us down by switching paths. Also around the time she started seeing Trevor, Olivia began being very cruel towards our mother (our mother had been borderline emotionally abusive in the past, but Olivia and I were both in college by then and fixing our relationships with her. She has been much better recently and Olivia and I believe that she had some mental health struggles that went unchecked that contributed). Now, several years later, Olivia told our family that she had acted like that because she was raped by a friend of her ex-boyfriend's after her ex broke up with her. This person also gave her an STD.
I always believe people who say they have been sexually assaulted, abused, or harassed, and we believed Olivia when she first told us, but some things have come to light that make me and my family question that. Right after Olivia and her ex broke up, Olivia told our cousin that she had gone out with one of his friends and had revenge/ breakup sex with him because he had also been dumped recently. Once my cousin told me this, I remembered that Olivia had told me about a guy she had a one night stand with after she was dumped. She showed me a picture of him, talked about how cute he was, etc. (no distress whatsoever). I know sometimes people behave in ways you wouldn't expect when a traumatic event occurs to them, but I really don't understand how or why Olivia would brag about this guy if he really did sexually assault her.
Three months ago, Olivia was arrested for stealing a set of sheets from Walmart. She used the self check-out and only bought a small $5 item and the sheets. She held both in one hand and scanned each side because she had a cut on the other hand and was holding her wallet with it. She saw a 5 in front of the total number and thought it looked right because the total should have been about $50, paid, didn't get a receipt, and walked out. An employee at the door asked to see a receipt, which Olivia didn't have, so she pulled up her transaction history on her phone to show she had paid. At this point, the employee called the police and took Olivia into an office, where she was questioned and charged with shoplifting. (Olivia can get very emotional and probably got upset when the police questioned her, which may have led them to believe she was lying). Luckily, Olivia has managed to get the charges expunged, but the process is still ongoing. Because of her ADHD, if anyone genuinely made this mistake, I would believe it from her, but Olivia has been improving a lot on organization and being more attentive recently. It is extremely uncharacteristic of her to steal- she was honest to a fault as kids- she would break down from guilt and admit things to our parents that we would have gotten away with if she hadn't said anything.
Right now, my parents have met Trevor twice in person, and I've met him once in person and several times in passing over facetime. I personally don't think that Trevor seems to keep up with my sister or that they make each other shine, and that opinion is shared with family friends and family that have met Trevor. Olivia doesn't mention Trevor in front of our parents often because his name has become a topic of contention and argument between them. My parents don't think Trevor is right for Olivia. She has almost 2 college degrees and plans to become a nurse practitioner in the future, and he hasn't finished college and doesn't seem to have any drive to do so. Olivia is also well traveled and enjoys going to museums, concerts, etc., while Trevor has lived in rural FL his whole life (this is not Trevor's fault, and I don't think he is a lesser person because of it, but I don't see a lot of common ground between them). Trevor has not seemed very well spoken when I have talked to him and I just don't see a lot of qualities in him that Olivia values.
If you've gotten this far, I just don't know what to do. Olivia and my parents have a huge rift in their relationship right now and any mention of Trevor, with her around or not, explodes into a huge argument, discussion, or just icy silence. I want Olivia to be able to talk to me about him, and we are able to discuss things much better than she is with our parents. My parents have also started asking me about Olivia and Trevor because they know Olivia shares more with me, and it makes me uncomfortable because I don't want to betray Olivia's trust, but I'm also very worried about her. I know I can't control her actions and I'm having a really hard time trying to balance supporting Olivia but not supporting the relationship (I'm not going to lie to her about how I feel, but I don't want her to feel alienated or unloved by our family, because that is NOT the case). I also think that Olivia is romanticizing the fact that our parents don't like him because my father's parents had a rift with him over our mother when we were very young (this is a whole other story, but basically, his parents always favored his sister, his sister got (I think) jealous when he did well for himself and married my mother, who his parents initially likes, and she made up rumors/lies about my mother that turned his parents against her (this was way before our mother's suspected mental health struggles, which occured when Olivia and I were in middle/high school).
Please share any thoughts you have on the situation (am I reading too into things, is this not as bad as I think it is?), and any advice you have on navigating the relationships.

How long did it take you to finish the OA? And did you just go through the course material and the recorded videos? I quickly went through the videos and didn’t find it very helpful. I failed the OA in my first attempt. I also made a mistake of taking the test only by going through the videos and didn’t pay close attention to the course material. Anyone has any suggestions for finishing the OA quickly?

It's a late announcement as the GOP senate primaries are today in Nebraska. But full time farmer and frequent Majority Report caller Aaron Kowalski is taking on the incumbent GOP senator Deb Fischer in Nebraska. Calling for a Rural Revolution he would like to propose solutions to the housing crisis such as a 21st Century Homestead Act to revitalize rural communities in America, a way to combat climate change through a Greenhouse Initiative and a Conservation Economy to help small family farmers fight against corporate farming. Deb Fischer has been in the seat for too long now, it's time to vote for someone who's willing to make some changes for Nebraska.
Here's a link to his website: https://www.arronforsenate.com/
And here's a video where he did a interview with NTV: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s9TKtc7b_08

“Did that Human just hit my ship?” Admiral Carney of the Saigor Empire peered out of the viewport. His voice tinged with disbelief. His ship, the Gavaron, a superstar dreadnought 10 kilometres long and brimming with every weapon the galaxy had to offer, was being propelled backwards past the fourth planet of this insignificant solar system by a man dressed in a blue suit and red cape. The crew, initially stunned, began to regain their composure and halt the ship.
“Sir? What should we do?” His second-in-command looked at the screen in disbelief. “That hit destroyed the forward shield generators and the forward main cannon!”
“Ehhh? That has to be a hologram. Scan for whatever weapon they used and send in two frigates to destroy whatever that thing is.”
His order was followed, and he saw two of the frigates that had been held back speed past him, launching rockets at the target, only for the rocket to be blasted by some red laser from this human's eyes, according to the video feed.
“Are you seeing this? What in the fifth unholy hell is this thing from? Is it a droid? “
“Scans say it's biological, and there is no technology detected, and according to our files, it looks human.”
“LOOKS HUMAN?” Admiral Carney turned to the science officer. “Does that look like a normal biological being to you? Those rockets are made of Dirunium. We can launch them through a damn sun if we want to.”
He turned to see this human grabbing a frigate and slinging it towards them. The other hightailed out of there, jumping into light speed in whatever direction they were facing. Smart kids, he thought.
“Brace for impact!”
“Brace for impact, but the shields?” His first officer looked at the helmsman as he shouted out the warning. Admiral Carney sighed and looked at him. “He destroyed them, remember? Move the ship out of the trajectory, turn the ships around and get us out of here. We can't fight that thing.“
“What about the shield? We can't jump without a shield?”
“Have a support ship land on the bow, and have them extend their shields over our damaged area. Then, let's get out of here. “
“Sir! The human is approaching us.” The words made it go cold down his spine. How could that thing, man, move that fast without any tech?
“Is he attacking?” He managed to keep his voice calm but he was getting worried. Was he to die here? In what was supposed to be a simple invasion to teach the recruits how to do the job.
“No, he is just watching us.” The words calmed him down. Maybe they could survive this. It was a defence system; it had to be, so if they just left, it would leave them be.
“Then ignore him, and let's get out of here.”
When he finally had time, he went over the reports. Earth was not supposed to have such a being as its defender. He had never seen or heard anything like this. This might cost him his job, but there was no way in the five unholy hell he could ever win over that. He logged the report and got himself a drink. He looked at his own fist. The green muscular fist would never be able to do something like that. They will cut his horns and blind his third eye for this, but he would survive. He could leave the navy and find a job on a starbase far from the capital planet. Yeah, it might be for the best. He got out the pad, wrote down his resignation, and sent it to the headquarter.

Five years later

Jar Carney had been working as a bartender at the Gustun star base for five years now, a trader base that saw creatures from all over the galaxies. Here, nobody knew or cared who he was, though he had heard the stories about the admiral who quit his position after attacking Earth, and a single human beat them back. It was a very popular story among some of the travellers. The only thing Jar found funny was that they often got the species of the admiral. In fact, mostly, it was somebody else than a Cunar like him; it tended to change. Lately, it was a female admiral of the Surion empire. Carney had to smirk at how the story had changed, and then he turned to the new Surion bartender, Saris, a young woman with a serious face who always kept to herself. She was pretty for a Surion; her soft yellow and black striped fur and the short tale made her cute, and her feminine movement had already made a few brave patrons try their luck. However, she ignored them all. “Hey, I didn’t know you guys had female admirals?”
She froze as he spoke, and Jamir, the local drunk, chuckled. “Only if they are royalty, they are given a fleet and told to show what they can do. But this time, this princess went to Earth, which was such a stupid choice. I thought they had learnt by now.” He then winked five of his 15 eyes at Saris.
Both Carney and Saris turned to him and said in unison, “What?”
Jamir laughed and finished his drink. “I’m the Funasta Admiral they spoke about last year. Unlike the smart invaders, I managed to land on that cursed planet, and while that demon tore through my fleet in space, I had to face something even worse. We set up a teleport point and just started to send in our mech units. They suddenly faced a green giant behemoth of a human. The more they shoot at him, the stronger and more dangerous he became. Then, we launched our troops and drone fighters. The humans responded by sending in more of these demons. First was a man in red who ran faster than we could see. Then a man dressed in old armour and a hammer of all things came, he controlled the weather and everywhere he struck was also hit by lightning from a clear sky. The green behemoth and the hammer guy are just as strong as the demon in the sky. They just can't fly like him. Besides the red blur that will zip around and disarm your troops, the ground support of those two monsters is a few other demons. There is a man with metal claws that could heal any wounds we inflicted on him. He is aided by a woman who tore through our men like they were paper. We had managed to defend the teleporter, so we poured in our drone clones. It didn’t matter.” He took another drink as he got lost in the nightmare that would follow. It took a second before he continued.
“The worst happened when night came. They made the dead rise to fight, Led by some bloodthirsty beast who drained our officers. Then came the humans, who turned into predatory animals and were immune to anything we threw at them. At that point, we finally had enough and ran away. We teleported home since all our ships had been destroyed and destroyed our side of the gate. So, of course, I was expelled.” He smirked, showing maw of short teeth.” But I had recorded too much evidence for them to ignore it, so we sent spies to try and find a weakness in their defense, and then we found out we were not the first to face them like this.“ He held out his glass for refill, which he got.
“We discovered that they have defeated at least eight invasions this way. And” He stopped for dramatic effect. “ We discovered their weapon. Those monsters are not real—well, they are real, but they are the result of human imagination. They have this technology that allows them to pull their —what’s the word? Ahh, now I remember superheroes and monsters from their books and movies, and for as long as people needed them, they would protect them from the enemies of the Earth. You see, they vanish once the invasion is over. Then the humans plunder the battlefield for tech.” He chuckles as he looks at his clawed hand. “Yeah, so here we sit, three admirals fracked up by imaginary monsters because nobody would believe it before seeing it with their own eyes. I mean, would your rulers believe such a fracked-up story.”
As always, let me know if you post it anywhere else. I'm okay with it as long as I get credit and am notified.

So, my friend and I have planned this trekking agency for a long time. We've been at it for 2 years, but it just hasn't taken off. He's the guide and brings in the travel vlogs, while I handle marketing, planning, website design, video editing, and everything online. He comes from a very poor background, so my strategy is to start without spending a dime. The plan is to only make it legal after we get a handful of clients; the only legal thing we need is the permit, which we can obtain from other travel agencies we know.
Now, with that out of the way, my friend takes 15 days or more to complete a task that should take 5 minutes. Whenever we agree to meet at a specific time, he ghosts me and goes to roam around or play snooker. This has happened multiple times. I always brushed it off, thinking he's a small thinker who believes these things aren't possible.
Whenever I try to discuss what type of videos we're going to make, such as the idea of "$10 can get you in this place," he's always busy with personal matters. Despite numerous pep talks about the potential success and the financial benefits for his family, he understands momentarily but reverts to his old self, lacking life goals. By the way, he's turning 29 soon, while I'm 25.
Things got worse, so I decided to quit about 6 months ago. However, he returned motivated after positive feedback from a client he accompanied. Initially hesitant due to my belief in patterns and people rarely changing, I relented because he's my best friend and an experienced guide with over 80 treks. Why not give it another try?
It started smoothly, but I found that I had to initiate everything, from planning to moving forward. That's fine as long as he compromises, but he hasn't. I've been trying to meet him for the last 5 days, but there are always excuses, like the rain or family obligations.
We finally planned to meet the day before yesterday, but he ghosted me and went elsewhere. When I asked him why, he said he thought I'd be mad if he told me he had to go somewhere else, so he ghosted me.
Yesterday, I deliberately tried to provoke him because he wasn't replying to my texts. He responded when I called him a 'son of a bitch', but he's called me that before. I gave him an ultimatum, telling him to get his emotions together and meet me at the agreed time, or we're done with the business. He didn't reply, so it's over at this point.
P.S. He's never apologized or taken responsibility. He fails to acknowledge that my time is valuable; I've had to sacrifice my freelancing work and reject other business opportunities for this. Yet, I still cling to hope that he'll change, akin to a woman loving a junkie deeply despite facing abuse. Everyone calls her crazy, but in her mind, there's hope for change.
Lastly, everything is set up for success. We have a professional website, sponsors (his previous clients could contribute thousands of dollars), video tools, experience, and expertise to attract more clients.