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2018.08.20 22:46 TravonM How to attract beautiful women
Want to learn how to meet, attract, and date beautiful women? Well, in this subreddit I will be sharing with you everything you need to know to become more attractive to beautiful women, and start meeting the women of your dreams.
2024.05.15 14:18 HeadBoy9 Prison days #355, #356, #357 (Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, 12, 13, 14, 2024)
Many turbulent waters have passed under a very narrow bridge these past three days. We feared fear itself on a different level and experienced some of the biggest stress we have in a very long time. We were locked almost 24 hours (20 minutes of open-out time on Monday and Tuesday).
Considering that most of us don't eat the prison rations, we hungered and thirst greatly. At some points food and water became scarce in the entire yard. Bread was completely unavailable and treated and packaged water was spent. All sellers sold out within the first 20 minutes of opening on Monday. Since there was nothing entering or leaving, by Tuesday afternoon, no food or water could be found at any cell or anywhere within the yard.
Remember, the first news of an imminent search came on Saturday night (Day #354) and we did an emergency hiding of our phones. We were all scared and restless, the hiding wasn't safe, we only hid anywhere that looked like something could be put in it. It was already late when this info came and we were all already locked in and couldn't, well, go out, so we only did our hidings within and around. During the day, the following morning, we used our phones until locking time before the hiding began again and stretched into the night. (I'm talking about Sunday evening/night now).
I sent mine along with the accessories to the workshop for safekeeping while others hid theirs in many creative ways. Officially, cells collected their phones together in a plastic bucket and holes were dug within the blocks and they were buried. This was done under the cover of night.
COs opened our cells and instructed us to do it and make sure no contraband remained in any cell as this would always bounce back on them. They didn't want that and so had to aid us. The external search party that came was directly from the nation's capital (HQ of corrections) and were therefore superior to any officer in this facility. Even superior to the state comptroller of corrections. It was a pretty tense situation for us inmates and as well for them COs.
On Sunday night, I slept quite well after we'd hidden our phones and stuff, mine in the toilet at the workshop and others majorly buried in the ground inside blocks. Early in the morning on Monday, when the search was to begin, was when we had the most anxiety. The cells and blocks were just too troublingly quiet. I mean it was so quiet it was deafening, literally. Like a pressure built up in my two ears and everything paused and people moved in slow motion, kind of quiet.
Suspense. Suspense. Suspense. In the morning, before they eventually showed up, we were dying of suspense. Being fortunate as a result of the positioning of our cell, we have a window that can see a greater part of the yard, as well as the main gate far up front. For this morning, everyone wanted to stand at that window and mount the sentry. Thump, thump, thump our hearts thumped and silence remained deafening.
Finally they started trickling in with swag after some waiting. Big, mean looking dogs pulled by big muscled, mean looking COs, were in front, and came charging in. These hellhounds looked as though they had a score to settle with the inhabitants of this hell and would tear them and their abode apart if they got the chance. They didn't!
I'm talking Monday morning now.
Some dramas unfolded that wouldn't permit the hounds to have their fun. What happened was that immediately the search company entered, they turned left and began marching to Back Cell. This is the place where the hardest death row inmates are kept. So, as soon as these condemned guys knew they were coming, they let out such demonic shouts that rent and vibrated the previously unsettlingly quiet atmosphere, cursings and threatenings of stabbings and stranglings, and forced feeding the intruders their overnight shit defecated into plastic containers, echoed.
Such terrible roars their shouts were. The other two blocks, besides Back Cell, where death row inmates are kept, on hearing their fellows, also joined in on the bawl. As Back Cell shouted one thing, it was picked up by the other two blocks, rebounded and volleyed back into the uttermost parts of the prison. They sort of formed a shout transmission triangle.
This development was psychological, calculated and halted our unwanted visitors dead in their tracks. Men who were as good as dead had told them they weren't wanted and would have their deaths fast-forwarded if they advanced further. Their march now paused, they had no choice but to think deeply about all the possible options. To be sure, the losers would be them if they chose to engage foolishly. Dead men have nothing to lose, you know?
After much consideration, the company put forward the Chief of the yard and the resident Deputy Comptroller of Corrections (DCC) to go reason with their dead men. They did and the men told them the only thing they could promise them was deaths if anyone dared to step beyond their designated buffer zone.
Back Cell won. The company then had to send their war dogs out of the yard and adopted a more friendly mien all in a bid to diffuse tension and tone down aggressions. I would say it worked because the shouts died down and the next death row block they turned to cooperated and the search began.
They were very thorough and took a lot of stuff but surprisingly very few phones (already buried, yo!). Knives, belts, bottles, electric stoves and kettles were all taken. Gold blings of all types and serious cash were found and confiscated from the rich blocks. Contrary to expectation, the workshop where my stuff was hidden was searched. I died immediately they marched in there and remained dead, though walking around, until the next day. Not knowing if they took my things was harder and more torture than if they'd actually taken it and I knew immediately. I suffered for hours.
My block wasn't visited until Tuesday. By this time, the searchers were already spent and the aggression had left them and returned to their HQ (lol). The tendency to be dicks and bullies had fizzled out, now they were too nice. I needed to check if I hadn't woken at the Four Seasons somehow for how civil they were.
Tell you what? Technically, they didn't search our cell. As soon as the searchers arrived at our block, our cell being the first, they gathered in front. One got very close to our gate and codedly asked that we arrange money and give him so he wouldn't search us and we did. Turns out only five of the company were the ones allowed into the cells to do the actual searching and he was the leader of the five.
Having slipped money into his hand while we were moving out, they merely made a show of searching the bunks closest to the gate where their colleagues and Superiors stood, but took nothing out even if it was an exhibit. They didn't touch the bunks deeper inside at all. We were made to sit on the ground in front of our cell while they did their thing inside. After a while, they came out with only two laughable things and declared to their boss that our cell is clean (lolz, the money we gave them was equally clean).
Actually, why it was like that was that Authority didn't want us to be searched at all but had to do it to fulfill all righteousness. The DCC told them if they don't search everyone, fighting would break out. The people searched and their things seized would cause trouble. So they only came to our block not to search but for show. Our block has the most impeccable record of any block and our cell stands out of any cell in the block for good behavior.
I later understood that the search was originally targeted at the death row guys at Back Cell, Blocks One and Two, and B block. Other places searched were only as a matter of necessity to serve as cover and to even things out and not hurt already hurt feelings. Principally, it was that transgender in Block Two that singlehandedly attracted and brought this search upon us. He was using his phone recklessly on social media, doing live videos and shits. The extent of his popularity gave his actions a lot of visibility and a lot of powerful people saw it, hence the searchlight fell on prisons.
When it was all over (Tuesday evening), they opened us for only 20 minutes to stretch our limbs but that was just all we needed. Everything buried in the ground was uprooted and I got my phone from the workshop as well. Belts and other things followed later. Hunger and thirst was tough on us these few days. Honestly, prison would be unbearable without our phones, many of us found out during this period. I rest my pen for now.
Tomorrow is Wednesday and normalcy will return. I'm almost thinking: why go through all that trouble for nothing? I may as well have had my stuff tucked away under my bunk and be safe. Anyway, better safe than sorry.
Goodnight Diary!
submitted by HeadBoy9 to PrisonDiary [link] [comments]
Considering that most of us don't eat the prison rations, we hungered and thirst greatly. At some points food and water became scarce in the entire yard. Bread was completely unavailable and treated and packaged water was spent. All sellers sold out within the first 20 minutes of opening on Monday. Since there was nothing entering or leaving, by Tuesday afternoon, no food or water could be found at any cell or anywhere within the yard.
Remember, the first news of an imminent search came on Saturday night (Day #354) and we did an emergency hiding of our phones. We were all scared and restless, the hiding wasn't safe, we only hid anywhere that looked like something could be put in it. It was already late when this info came and we were all already locked in and couldn't, well, go out, so we only did our hidings within and around. During the day, the following morning, we used our phones until locking time before the hiding began again and stretched into the night. (I'm talking about Sunday evening/night now).
I sent mine along with the accessories to the workshop for safekeeping while others hid theirs in many creative ways. Officially, cells collected their phones together in a plastic bucket and holes were dug within the blocks and they were buried. This was done under the cover of night.
COs opened our cells and instructed us to do it and make sure no contraband remained in any cell as this would always bounce back on them. They didn't want that and so had to aid us. The external search party that came was directly from the nation's capital (HQ of corrections) and were therefore superior to any officer in this facility. Even superior to the state comptroller of corrections. It was a pretty tense situation for us inmates and as well for them COs.
On Sunday night, I slept quite well after we'd hidden our phones and stuff, mine in the toilet at the workshop and others majorly buried in the ground inside blocks. Early in the morning on Monday, when the search was to begin, was when we had the most anxiety. The cells and blocks were just too troublingly quiet. I mean it was so quiet it was deafening, literally. Like a pressure built up in my two ears and everything paused and people moved in slow motion, kind of quiet.
Suspense. Suspense. Suspense. In the morning, before they eventually showed up, we were dying of suspense. Being fortunate as a result of the positioning of our cell, we have a window that can see a greater part of the yard, as well as the main gate far up front. For this morning, everyone wanted to stand at that window and mount the sentry. Thump, thump, thump our hearts thumped and silence remained deafening.
Finally they started trickling in with swag after some waiting. Big, mean looking dogs pulled by big muscled, mean looking COs, were in front, and came charging in. These hellhounds looked as though they had a score to settle with the inhabitants of this hell and would tear them and their abode apart if they got the chance. They didn't!
I'm talking Monday morning now.
Some dramas unfolded that wouldn't permit the hounds to have their fun. What happened was that immediately the search company entered, they turned left and began marching to Back Cell. This is the place where the hardest death row inmates are kept. So, as soon as these condemned guys knew they were coming, they let out such demonic shouts that rent and vibrated the previously unsettlingly quiet atmosphere, cursings and threatenings of stabbings and stranglings, and forced feeding the intruders their overnight shit defecated into plastic containers, echoed.
Such terrible roars their shouts were. The other two blocks, besides Back Cell, where death row inmates are kept, on hearing their fellows, also joined in on the bawl. As Back Cell shouted one thing, it was picked up by the other two blocks, rebounded and volleyed back into the uttermost parts of the prison. They sort of formed a shout transmission triangle.
This development was psychological, calculated and halted our unwanted visitors dead in their tracks. Men who were as good as dead had told them they weren't wanted and would have their deaths fast-forwarded if they advanced further. Their march now paused, they had no choice but to think deeply about all the possible options. To be sure, the losers would be them if they chose to engage foolishly. Dead men have nothing to lose, you know?
After much consideration, the company put forward the Chief of the yard and the resident Deputy Comptroller of Corrections (DCC) to go reason with their dead men. They did and the men told them the only thing they could promise them was deaths if anyone dared to step beyond their designated buffer zone.
Back Cell won. The company then had to send their war dogs out of the yard and adopted a more friendly mien all in a bid to diffuse tension and tone down aggressions. I would say it worked because the shouts died down and the next death row block they turned to cooperated and the search began.
They were very thorough and took a lot of stuff but surprisingly very few phones (already buried, yo!). Knives, belts, bottles, electric stoves and kettles were all taken. Gold blings of all types and serious cash were found and confiscated from the rich blocks. Contrary to expectation, the workshop where my stuff was hidden was searched. I died immediately they marched in there and remained dead, though walking around, until the next day. Not knowing if they took my things was harder and more torture than if they'd actually taken it and I knew immediately. I suffered for hours.
My block wasn't visited until Tuesday. By this time, the searchers were already spent and the aggression had left them and returned to their HQ (lol). The tendency to be dicks and bullies had fizzled out, now they were too nice. I needed to check if I hadn't woken at the Four Seasons somehow for how civil they were.
Tell you what? Technically, they didn't search our cell. As soon as the searchers arrived at our block, our cell being the first, they gathered in front. One got very close to our gate and codedly asked that we arrange money and give him so he wouldn't search us and we did. Turns out only five of the company were the ones allowed into the cells to do the actual searching and he was the leader of the five.
Having slipped money into his hand while we were moving out, they merely made a show of searching the bunks closest to the gate where their colleagues and Superiors stood, but took nothing out even if it was an exhibit. They didn't touch the bunks deeper inside at all. We were made to sit on the ground in front of our cell while they did their thing inside. After a while, they came out with only two laughable things and declared to their boss that our cell is clean (lolz, the money we gave them was equally clean).
Actually, why it was like that was that Authority didn't want us to be searched at all but had to do it to fulfill all righteousness. The DCC told them if they don't search everyone, fighting would break out. The people searched and their things seized would cause trouble. So they only came to our block not to search but for show. Our block has the most impeccable record of any block and our cell stands out of any cell in the block for good behavior.
I later understood that the search was originally targeted at the death row guys at Back Cell, Blocks One and Two, and B block. Other places searched were only as a matter of necessity to serve as cover and to even things out and not hurt already hurt feelings. Principally, it was that transgender in Block Two that singlehandedly attracted and brought this search upon us. He was using his phone recklessly on social media, doing live videos and shits. The extent of his popularity gave his actions a lot of visibility and a lot of powerful people saw it, hence the searchlight fell on prisons.
When it was all over (Tuesday evening), they opened us for only 20 minutes to stretch our limbs but that was just all we needed. Everything buried in the ground was uprooted and I got my phone from the workshop as well. Belts and other things followed later. Hunger and thirst was tough on us these few days. Honestly, prison would be unbearable without our phones, many of us found out during this period. I rest my pen for now.
Tomorrow is Wednesday and normalcy will return. I'm almost thinking: why go through all that trouble for nothing? I may as well have had my stuff tucked away under my bunk and be safe. Anyway, better safe than sorry.
Goodnight Diary!
2024.05.15 14:16 Leading-Hippo-7289 Short men are more attractive than tall men
I never understood this obsession with tall men, I always found shorter guys far more attractive. It’s not even just the hight in itself, I think short men just tend to have a more proportional and well balanced build. Like their body seems more harmonious with better proportions, and more grounded and agile somehow. I’m 5.5, and so was the only guy I ever dated. I think I haven’t been attracted to anyone above 5.7. I like it very much to date someone who is roughly the same size as me and I find it weird that someone would like their partner to be much talker than them.
I refuses to believe that this “taller men are hotter” thing is legit, and not some weird made up social phenomenon like how in China people used to obsess over small feet. I mean, what could be more attractive than a short, strongly built fit guy??
submitted by Leading-Hippo-7289 to unpopularopinion [link] [comments]
I refuses to believe that this “taller men are hotter” thing is legit, and not some weird made up social phenomenon like how in China people used to obsess over small feet. I mean, what could be more attractive than a short, strongly built fit guy??
2024.05.15 14:06 mmelookingg Being tall is more important than being good looking for a man , in order to be successful in dating and relationships.
The first physical attribute that anyone notices about you is your height . Tall Men get treated better , Are more successful , are considered as more attractive. Its not just career . Tall men have it easy in dating and they get womens attention first . Women are in high competition with eachother to get into relationship with them. Average height or short guys are no one's first option even though they have other attractive features such as good looking faces or intelligence or ... Even tall men can get away with being autistic and still have successful love life . The importance of being tall shouldn't be downplayed.
submitted by mmelookingg to TrueUnpopularOpinion [link] [comments]
2024.05.15 13:57 Apprehensive_Gate953 Dating
The people who have tried to explain dating to me have completely killed all my motivation to date. Why do people who have no trouble in romance believe their advice would ever work for someone who has no experience in dating and has a soft personality? Where are the people who give actual clear and concise dating advice? I can't find anyone who knows what they are talking about. Attractive men don't want to admit they have it easy and like to pretend they are doing everything in their power in dating when in reality they have to put in zero effort at all because they don't do the approaching, so why would I want advice from that?
submitted by Apprehensive_Gate953 to dating [link] [comments]
2024.05.15 13:53 shaneka69 CANCER ZODIAC - UNEXPECTED INCOME! TAROT READING MAY 2024
CANCER ZODIAC TAROT READING - UNEXPECTED INCOME MAY 2024
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2024.05.15 13:35 Call_Me_Aiden Having top surgery date sort of enforces my bottom dysphoria
TW: Internalized transphobia, sexism, dysphoria
While I was in the process of Hiding™ from me being trans, there was a time I very much focused on what I missed the most: Different genitals. It lead me to envision my body in a somewhat distorted way often: Mostly as it was, but with different genitals.
That, on top with some very distorted views on sexuality and the value of women that I had internalized, made it probably the thing I thought about most when thinking of my transition goals. I'm not going to go in detail exactly, but I think most can guess what I'm referring to exactly when the topic I'm discussing is top surgery. As a hint: Women often expressed some kind of envy to my uh... assets, and men were also often appreciative. There's still a lot more that happened that formed that unhealthy idea, but yeah.
I thought I had worked through all those feelings. I was "okay" while I still had them, mostly feeling the dysphoria in a social way, as well as it truly standing in the way of not seeing myself as a fraud whenever I was just chilling at home without a binder. But I knew I wanted it, needed it, and that I actually hated them, and always had, and how I had just focused on things that made them seem impractical as to hide from the reality: I just don't want them, apart from a very specific sexual context - which is fully internalized - and even then, I don't really.
I explored the possibility of reduction even, small enough I could easily hide them but present that ~for certain purposes~ they would exist. I accepted any and every possibility, I feel no need to perform masculinity any certain way, I've become unapologetically myself, and the conclusion was: Yeet them.
When I finally got my top surgery date, all those old feelings resurfaced. It made me think I was making a mistake, like I might just be non-binary, or enjoying masculinity but in a butch way (absolutely false, mind you, I'd feel so unseen if I were to be seen as a very masc butch). Doesn't help I'm probably most attracted to a certain type of non-binary/androgynous expression, that combines beards with fem hairstyles and outfits. But those people aren't me (and often have flat chests so wtf). I like feminine expression (edit: on me, that is) only in so far it is performative, sexual and sensual, like some queer men would if that's their thing. :/
It made me realize this isn't about top, this is about the bottom department. That's where I've focused so long on, and I need to shift that image I had of myself moments before cracking. I knew twenty years ago already that I wanted all of it, that I just wanted to live my life as a guy and be left alone for the rest of it. That I wanted nothing, absolutely nothing, that hinted at the body that I was given, and that includes top surgery. And yet, for some reason, every step of the way I first need to go in full crazy doubt-mode before I can just... do it. But taking T was never so irreversible. At this point I think I'll have the same doubt about bottom surgery once that comes up despite that being the absolute most consistent of them all.
Has anyone else experienced anything similar? If you did, and you've gone through with the surgery, how was it waking up, did it hit you harder than you expected? Or was it randomly freeing?
submitted by Call_Me_Aiden to ftm [link] [comments]
While I was in the process of Hiding™ from me being trans, there was a time I very much focused on what I missed the most: Different genitals. It lead me to envision my body in a somewhat distorted way often: Mostly as it was, but with different genitals.
That, on top with some very distorted views on sexuality and the value of women that I had internalized, made it probably the thing I thought about most when thinking of my transition goals. I'm not going to go in detail exactly, but I think most can guess what I'm referring to exactly when the topic I'm discussing is top surgery. As a hint: Women often expressed some kind of envy to my uh... assets, and men were also often appreciative. There's still a lot more that happened that formed that unhealthy idea, but yeah.
I thought I had worked through all those feelings. I was "okay" while I still had them, mostly feeling the dysphoria in a social way, as well as it truly standing in the way of not seeing myself as a fraud whenever I was just chilling at home without a binder. But I knew I wanted it, needed it, and that I actually hated them, and always had, and how I had just focused on things that made them seem impractical as to hide from the reality: I just don't want them, apart from a very specific sexual context - which is fully internalized - and even then, I don't really.
I explored the possibility of reduction even, small enough I could easily hide them but present that ~for certain purposes~ they would exist. I accepted any and every possibility, I feel no need to perform masculinity any certain way, I've become unapologetically myself, and the conclusion was: Yeet them.
When I finally got my top surgery date, all those old feelings resurfaced. It made me think I was making a mistake, like I might just be non-binary, or enjoying masculinity but in a butch way (absolutely false, mind you, I'd feel so unseen if I were to be seen as a very masc butch). Doesn't help I'm probably most attracted to a certain type of non-binary/androgynous expression, that combines beards with fem hairstyles and outfits. But those people aren't me (and often have flat chests so wtf). I like feminine expression (edit: on me, that is) only in so far it is performative, sexual and sensual, like some queer men would if that's their thing. :/
It made me realize this isn't about top, this is about the bottom department. That's where I've focused so long on, and I need to shift that image I had of myself moments before cracking. I knew twenty years ago already that I wanted all of it, that I just wanted to live my life as a guy and be left alone for the rest of it. That I wanted nothing, absolutely nothing, that hinted at the body that I was given, and that includes top surgery. And yet, for some reason, every step of the way I first need to go in full crazy doubt-mode before I can just... do it. But taking T was never so irreversible. At this point I think I'll have the same doubt about bottom surgery once that comes up despite that being the absolute most consistent of them all.
Has anyone else experienced anything similar? If you did, and you've gone through with the surgery, how was it waking up, did it hit you harder than you expected? Or was it randomly freeing?
2024.05.15 13:34 booksandstrings Need help figuring out if I'm lesbian
I'm not sure if I fit this group but I read the basic community resource document and felt that my experience matches this group's info. I'm 21F who thinks she's straight.....except for the fact that I masturbate only to women. I just can't imagine myself with a guy doing those things. And when I do, my pov becomes that of a third person - as if I'm witnessing that fantasy from without any attachment, like a dissociative state. I have never been assaulted before and have never had bad experiences with men so it's not a trauma response. I always thought I'm straight because I have found guys attractive previously (total 3 guys in the last 8 years). I've never had any romantic/sexual experiences (not even holding hands). I'm moving out of my parents home for uni and I feel like I will find out that I'm a lesbian when I go to uni lmao. I was going to get into a hookup to get my sexuality confirmed but couldn't because I wasn't sure I wanted to go through.
I just want to hear what y'all think about this. Like thinking out loud from women who are lesbians/ late bloomers.
submitted by booksandstrings to latebloomerlesbians [link] [comments]
I just want to hear what y'all think about this. Like thinking out loud from women who are lesbians/ late bloomers.
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submitted by shaneka69 to mytarotreadings [link] [comments]
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2024.05.15 13:27 A-Problem-Eliminator Am I the only one that doesn’t really find Alice Guo attractive?
I don’t know why men are fawning over her when she is not that attractive in the senate hearing, she looks too chinese and is on the plus side, and it is amazing how some men are wiling to let go of her accusations because of what she looks like.
submitted by A-Problem-Eliminator to adultingph [link] [comments]
2024.05.15 13:00 sevenarcticsheep sad gay pining: a vent post
I’ve known this girl, let’s call her S, for almost six years now, been friends for almost five. I always thought she was pretty and that evolved into what I think was a little crush after we started hanging out. I’m still unsure about how you tell what’s a crush or not. But this was in my late teens and I was sort of scared of my sexuality and just other people in general, so I barely even acknowledged it even to myself.
Eventually, I told my BFF who’s also friends with S. A while after that, BFF came to me and revealed that the girl had asked her if I had a crush on her, because I wanted to hang out one on one a lot. BFF was a hero and lied for me and said no. S was apparently relieved and said something like, the only reason I would have a crush on her was because she was the first wlw I’d made irl friends with. “[My] first viable option” or something like that.
That fucking stung, and killed my crushy feelings stone dead. So I was a bit of an asshole and, with BFF’s permission, called S and told her straight up I just liked her as a friend. She was terribly embarrassed and ngl I took a bit of sadistic joy in that at the time. I thought that that would be the end of it and I could focus on our platonic relationship instead.
It’s been three years since then. My gay feelings went on a bit of a break but crept back in. I still sometimes get butterflies looking at her, or even just thinking about her. The other day she wore a top her boobs looked fantastic in and it was awful and wonderful at the same time. (I wanted to tell her she looked good, like BFF did, but I felt like a creep and didn’t.)
It’s not like it’s ruining my life or anything. I don’t lose sleep over this. I just … pine lol
S is bi but, in her own words, regularly forgets she’s gay. She’s also considering whether she might be asexual. That tracks because I’ve never seen her express any sort of attraction toward women—I’ve not really seen her express any attraction toward real men, either, but she’s clearly drawn to a lot of fictional guys. On the other hand, she loves to semi-ironically talk shit about men, you know the classic, “That I’m bi is proof sexuality isn’t a choice, girls so soft and pretty, man so gross and ugly,” vaguely feminist-flavoured war of the sexes kind of stuff. Occasionally gets on my nerves, to be honest. Thankfully, it's been decreasing the older we get (what a shocker).
She’s way out of my league anyway. Objectively very pretty and conventionally attractive, though she doesn't understand that herself. It seems pretty much any relationship she strikes up with a guy, it ends with him asking her out. She always turns them down and gets uncomfortable and kind of freaked out about it, and BFF and I have to comfort her. She’s never been with anyone, though tbf never have I. (We’re 23 and 24.)
Most recently, a guy tried to ask her out, she turned him down and stopped talking to him. Then, a few weeks later, her phone rang and it was him. She deliberately ignored the call, but it turned out he was driving past and was just going to ask her if she wanted a ride, so he saw her ignore him. She was incredibly embarrassed.
So like. There’s something going on, clearly, but she doesn’t want to talk about it so [shrug] hope she figures it out I guess!
She does flirt with me, but it’s just how us three talk to one another. BFF, who’s straight, started it with both of us, S started flirting back and then started flirting with me. I very rarely reciprocate because it makes me feel like a creep, since I kind of sort of mean it. It’s also really nice lol. I scroll back through our text conversation to re-read my faves sometimes, which I know is not helpful.
Every time I think about this I’m kicking myself for not shooting my shot back when crushgate happened. In fairness to myself, I was struggling badly with my mental illness at the time and barely keeping my head above water, so it was understandable I didn’t want to risk anything. And I don’t want to risk anything now either. BFF is moving across the country this autumn and S stopped hanging out with the guys who’ve tried to ask her out, and I can’t lose both of them at once. I have atrocious social skills, a professionally diagnosed social anxiety disorder, and basically no other friends.
I want to date, I’m just terrified of it. I should go to bars and events and shit and find someone else. Both for its own sake and to get over S. But that’s easy to say and much harder to do. And a little voice at the back of my head keeps saying, why should I, when S is right here and so wonderful?
All of my problems are my own fault! What a shocker!
that’s all just wanted to vent thanks for reading <3
submitted by sevenarcticsheep to actuallesbians [link] [comments]
Eventually, I told my BFF who’s also friends with S. A while after that, BFF came to me and revealed that the girl had asked her if I had a crush on her, because I wanted to hang out one on one a lot. BFF was a hero and lied for me and said no. S was apparently relieved and said something like, the only reason I would have a crush on her was because she was the first wlw I’d made irl friends with. “[My] first viable option” or something like that.
That fucking stung, and killed my crushy feelings stone dead. So I was a bit of an asshole and, with BFF’s permission, called S and told her straight up I just liked her as a friend. She was terribly embarrassed and ngl I took a bit of sadistic joy in that at the time. I thought that that would be the end of it and I could focus on our platonic relationship instead.
It’s been three years since then. My gay feelings went on a bit of a break but crept back in. I still sometimes get butterflies looking at her, or even just thinking about her. The other day she wore a top her boobs looked fantastic in and it was awful and wonderful at the same time. (I wanted to tell her she looked good, like BFF did, but I felt like a creep and didn’t.)
It’s not like it’s ruining my life or anything. I don’t lose sleep over this. I just … pine lol
S is bi but, in her own words, regularly forgets she’s gay. She’s also considering whether she might be asexual. That tracks because I’ve never seen her express any sort of attraction toward women—I’ve not really seen her express any attraction toward real men, either, but she’s clearly drawn to a lot of fictional guys. On the other hand, she loves to semi-ironically talk shit about men, you know the classic, “That I’m bi is proof sexuality isn’t a choice, girls so soft and pretty, man so gross and ugly,” vaguely feminist-flavoured war of the sexes kind of stuff. Occasionally gets on my nerves, to be honest. Thankfully, it's been decreasing the older we get (what a shocker).
She’s way out of my league anyway. Objectively very pretty and conventionally attractive, though she doesn't understand that herself. It seems pretty much any relationship she strikes up with a guy, it ends with him asking her out. She always turns them down and gets uncomfortable and kind of freaked out about it, and BFF and I have to comfort her. She’s never been with anyone, though tbf never have I. (We’re 23 and 24.)
Most recently, a guy tried to ask her out, she turned him down and stopped talking to him. Then, a few weeks later, her phone rang and it was him. She deliberately ignored the call, but it turned out he was driving past and was just going to ask her if she wanted a ride, so he saw her ignore him. She was incredibly embarrassed.
So like. There’s something going on, clearly, but she doesn’t want to talk about it so [shrug] hope she figures it out I guess!
She does flirt with me, but it’s just how us three talk to one another. BFF, who’s straight, started it with both of us, S started flirting back and then started flirting with me. I very rarely reciprocate because it makes me feel like a creep, since I kind of sort of mean it. It’s also really nice lol. I scroll back through our text conversation to re-read my faves sometimes, which I know is not helpful.
Every time I think about this I’m kicking myself for not shooting my shot back when crushgate happened. In fairness to myself, I was struggling badly with my mental illness at the time and barely keeping my head above water, so it was understandable I didn’t want to risk anything. And I don’t want to risk anything now either. BFF is moving across the country this autumn and S stopped hanging out with the guys who’ve tried to ask her out, and I can’t lose both of them at once. I have atrocious social skills, a professionally diagnosed social anxiety disorder, and basically no other friends.
I want to date, I’m just terrified of it. I should go to bars and events and shit and find someone else. Both for its own sake and to get over S. But that’s easy to say and much harder to do. And a little voice at the back of my head keeps saying, why should I, when S is right here and so wonderful?
All of my problems are my own fault! What a shocker!
that’s all just wanted to vent thanks for reading <3
2024.05.15 12:53 shaneka69 CANCER ZODIAC - UNEXPECTED INCOME! TAROT READING MAY 2024
CANCER ZODIAC TAROT READING - UNEXPECTED INCOME MAY 2024
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2024.05.15 12:51 Lower_Drawing8230 Why can’t I be treated like a human being just because I’m average looking?
I have been on dates with a lot of men. Many men I’ve been on dates with are more attractive than me or famous. They have always treated me like trash and people almost seem to justify it. Just because I’m average looking and they’re attractive do I deserve to be treated like trash by them for absolutely no reason? No I don’t! I did nothing wrong and don’t deserve to be treated like shit for looking the way I do!
submitted by Lower_Drawing8230 to mentalhealth [link] [comments]
2024.05.15 12:44 GraceMorgan12 What Are the Top Services Offered by NYC Escorts?
 | https://preview.redd.it/miev44lnkk0d1.jpg?width=600&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f4ff35a007716812e237e0d92a81528a76c0531f submitted by GraceMorgan12 to u/GraceMorgan12 [link] [comments] While escort services vary in a broad spectrum, they still offer a truly unique and unforgettable experience to the most demanding clients. From quality company to special needs care, you will experience the highest level of service when you spend time with NYC escorts. Next, we will explore the various services offered by escorts and escorts, highlighting the diversity of experiences they can offer to those interested. On the other hand, these NY elite escorts provide professional services in companionship relations and are characterized by their vast experience involving men. Hiring them allows you to enjoy time with them for a few hours to two days, thus making it possible to be accompanied to events, conferences, or parties in NY. They are educated women, and many can be professionals or be studying, so they are an attractive company that can discuss any topic that interests you. Therefore, it is no need to mention that these women are brilliant and well-educated. You can even choose an escort with interests or hobbies similar to yours so that you have topics of conversation to spend the evening with. These Women Are IntelligentNY elite escorts can speak several languages, such as Spanish, French, or English, so spending a night with them at dinner or a business meeting becomes a stimulating experience. Without a doubt, the first aspect people look at when choosing a professional partner is its ability to offer high-quality experiences. Each woman has her skills, but when she becomes a true professional, she dedicates herself entirely to the satisfaction of the clients looking for this experience. These women often have extensive experience because they have worked in the field for a long time.That means they have learned tricks that allow them to offer unique services that can turn every meeting with them into an exceptional experience. Of course, you cannot compare the experience with NYC escorts to that of being with an ordinary woman you met in a bar. Even if one-night adventures can sometimes bring beautiful surprises, the safety and quality offered by a professional are incomparable. Dates with these women are accurate of another class, especially for those young with much experience in this field. They are masters of details and create a comfortable environment for men every moment. You are expected to feel emotions before engaging with an escort of this kind, but they are masters at making you feel relaxed, allowing you to express your inner passion. If you think you have explored all about pleasure because of previous experiences, let yourself be captivated by the love that any of these elite escorts can give you. You will find that there is much more to learn because they offer exceptional experience. A Rich Diversity of ServicesTheir impressive range of services represents another notable aspect of these experts in pleasure. From massages and delicate touches to highly intense experiences, those meetings you never dreamed of experiencing with your partner. Of course, you can also travel or have GFE experience, but being with a luxury mistress allows you to opt for something unique and different at every meeting you have in NYC. Many of them become specialized in very distinct services, such as "GFE," thus offering you a memorable experience when you choose to get involved with them.Forget the monotony of the usual date. Now, you have a lot of options. Many men ask for specific services that escorts can offer, including the girlfriend experience service. That means the companion is always with her client; she will behave the same way a girlfriend would. You may wonder why someone would want something like this. Because it is more personal, and many search for it. You can invite her to an event to enjoy the presence of a beautiful woman next to you, benefiting from all its advantages. Fulfilling the Fantasies You Never Dared to Explorehttps://preview.redd.it/xd7p1ftqkk0d1.jpg?width=600&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=df018db62bfd3bc44304edeac49d04629e7ff4dbIf you are a person who faces difficulties in establishing connections with women, this is an excellent option to overcome any fear or taboos you have. Even the companion from NY can create a story about how you met, making the service more authentic and stimulating. Professional women offer services in exchange for previously established compensation, including some less common practices. Many men choose to turn to these pleasure professionals to satisfy their fantasies that they know their partner would not be willing to fulfill, maybe because of the existence of some taboos still present. Escorts are professionals of pleasure, and their primary mission is to satisfy clients sexually, but they can offer much more. While most of the men who hire them are looking precisely for provocative and sexual services, many others want company. Someone with whom to enjoy a pleasant conversation or go to any elegant event, causing everyone's envy. Sexual women also offer such services, transforming themselves not only into escorts but also into companions, and many of them are elegant, educated, and have exquisite attitudes. That's why some of these elite escorts have that double facet: They are very intense and passionate on the job, but then, on the street, they can behave like real princesses. They are very versatile and complete girls who adapt to what the clients need and the situation at every moment. And that's because not everything in life is related to sex, and sometimes you need someone who knows how to listen, to help you overcome a difficult period, or to accompany you unconditionally. It will be in exchange for money, but these girls can become fantastic supporters for many men who, perhaps, are not understood by other women. Believe it or not, such a service that men search in NYC can be beneficial in solving different problems in a relationship. Sometimes, someone else from the outside who listens to your issues and talks to you about things you complain about can also help you understand what you can do to solve a couple of problems you may not be aware of. |
2024.05.15 12:43 Impossible_Tour5604 Why do married men always tell me this ??
I’m a guy in my late 20s and single but when talking to other men who are married; they ask me if I am married, have kids or have a gf and I say no. They always tell me this type of stuff:
If I was you I’ll be talking to every girl here right now getting with them. I wish I was in your shoes right now I’ll be with all the girls. I had so much fun when I was single I wish I was you.
It kinda makes me feel like I’m wasting my 20s/youth. I just lack urges or desire to try to talk to every girl I come across I find attractive and try to ask them out.
submitted by Impossible_Tour5604 to Advice [link] [comments]
If I was you I’ll be talking to every girl here right now getting with them. I wish I was in your shoes right now I’ll be with all the girls. I had so much fun when I was single I wish I was you.
It kinda makes me feel like I’m wasting my 20s/youth. I just lack urges or desire to try to talk to every girl I come across I find attractive and try to ask them out.
2024.05.15 12:40 Antique-Order-9326 I might have been accidentally doing Tabarruj, and i want to fix it.
Assalamualikum
I am a born Muslim and currently 18, I struggled with my faith and belief for a long time in my earlier years, up until like 17 years old. Allah azzawajjal called me back to him thankfully and so my faith was reignited, that was also around the time that i started wearing the hijab. although my hijab isn't see through and covers my hair, chest and back, however i have just begun to discover many faults within the way i dress.
Although I am not a big fan of makeup, i still usually do a little makeup to cover up my dark circles and just use a light lipstick or lip tint most of the time, which i still felt kind of is similar to adorning myself, at least the lipstick part is.
I am relatively short in height, which never really was a problem for me, still isn't but probably due to being short, I got into wearing block heels, which i will admit is scarily a great confident booster, which doesn't seem like a problem on the outer shell but during the days of Jahilliyah, Prostitutes would wear bells on their feet to get noticed as they walk paths or even in movies of today's day, you may notice that heels are often portrayed as weaknesses for men (not necessarily all men), but if a women were to walk by and her heel would make noise, it would definitely turn heads, hence I don't think its proper, because it just attracts unnecessary attention. Not just speaking from what i have read but even in my everyday life, i have physically witnessed people actually turning heads and gazing towards my direction from the sound of my heels.
The clothes i normally wear are simple, with no complicated designs, just varying colors. My clothes are loose; the top is not small, has full sleeves and goes down to a little over my knees, and the bottoms follows suit. The problem i have with them is that a while ago, i went on to research about the conditions of hijab and tabarruj, and some people stated that the colors of our hijab or just overall clothes should not be eye-catching. I would love to know more about this specific clause if anyone could elaborate.
I really want to meet Allah azzawajjal one day but I don't want to meet him in a state of sin, and constant improvements is the only way to becomes a better version of myself. Help would really be appreciated, thankyou for reading the long paras :))
Jazakallah Khair
submitted by Antique-Order-9326 to Hijabis [link] [comments]
I am a born Muslim and currently 18, I struggled with my faith and belief for a long time in my earlier years, up until like 17 years old. Allah azzawajjal called me back to him thankfully and so my faith was reignited, that was also around the time that i started wearing the hijab. although my hijab isn't see through and covers my hair, chest and back, however i have just begun to discover many faults within the way i dress.
Although I am not a big fan of makeup, i still usually do a little makeup to cover up my dark circles and just use a light lipstick or lip tint most of the time, which i still felt kind of is similar to adorning myself, at least the lipstick part is.
I am relatively short in height, which never really was a problem for me, still isn't but probably due to being short, I got into wearing block heels, which i will admit is scarily a great confident booster, which doesn't seem like a problem on the outer shell but during the days of Jahilliyah, Prostitutes would wear bells on their feet to get noticed as they walk paths or even in movies of today's day, you may notice that heels are often portrayed as weaknesses for men (not necessarily all men), but if a women were to walk by and her heel would make noise, it would definitely turn heads, hence I don't think its proper, because it just attracts unnecessary attention. Not just speaking from what i have read but even in my everyday life, i have physically witnessed people actually turning heads and gazing towards my direction from the sound of my heels.
The clothes i normally wear are simple, with no complicated designs, just varying colors. My clothes are loose; the top is not small, has full sleeves and goes down to a little over my knees, and the bottoms follows suit. The problem i have with them is that a while ago, i went on to research about the conditions of hijab and tabarruj, and some people stated that the colors of our hijab or just overall clothes should not be eye-catching. I would love to know more about this specific clause if anyone could elaborate.
I really want to meet Allah azzawajjal one day but I don't want to meet him in a state of sin, and constant improvements is the only way to becomes a better version of myself. Help would really be appreciated, thankyou for reading the long paras :))
Jazakallah Khair
2024.05.15 12:32 shaneka69 Get A Tarot Reading Today! ALL READINGS SENT SAME DAY THEY ARE BOOKED
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2024.05.15 12:32 Clydie3e Some advices...
Just a starter, guys. Please whatever I put in here I hope to get an honest advices and not discrimination and negative words.
I (20m) and my bf (23m) had a talk last time regarding watching 🌽 because I felt like when you're watching 🌽 it makes me feel useless and you don't want me to the things to spice things up (I know this sound inappropriate but I hope you guys understand what I'm saying). (Just a little background) When we start dating- well until now- I talk to him openly that watching 🌽 is a bad for men (in general) as it can make your body depend on it and won't feel to make love your partner as the time goes by, but it's okay if once in a while.
So back to the present times, I talk to him again openly and ask him if he still watch 🌽 and he said that sometimes he looks at it and eventually will remember what we've talk about so he will stop it. Then I mentioned to him that "you know what, after thingking about our conversation I think it's okay specially when we're together all the times and your body needs to release it". And to be honest I also have the tempt to look at it and watch it but it feels like wrong.
Maybe it's just me thingking of jealousy that maybe one day my partner wouldn't find me attractive if he keeps on watching it.
But of course as someone new in a relationship still assessing the situation if it's right or wrong and make sure we're doing okay. It's just that I think it's wrong and right at the same time? I don't know. Does this typically happen in other relationships? What did you guys do? How did you make sure that you and partner will be okay with this set up?
Idk. Can I have your honest reaction and some advices? By the way he's my first bf hehe I hope to have a positive comments with you guys. Thank you!
submitted by Clydie3e to relationshipgoals [link] [comments]
I (20m) and my bf (23m) had a talk last time regarding watching 🌽 because I felt like when you're watching 🌽 it makes me feel useless and you don't want me to the things to spice things up (I know this sound inappropriate but I hope you guys understand what I'm saying). (Just a little background) When we start dating- well until now- I talk to him openly that watching 🌽 is a bad for men (in general) as it can make your body depend on it and won't feel to make love your partner as the time goes by, but it's okay if once in a while.
So back to the present times, I talk to him again openly and ask him if he still watch 🌽 and he said that sometimes he looks at it and eventually will remember what we've talk about so he will stop it. Then I mentioned to him that "you know what, after thingking about our conversation I think it's okay specially when we're together all the times and your body needs to release it". And to be honest I also have the tempt to look at it and watch it but it feels like wrong.
Maybe it's just me thingking of jealousy that maybe one day my partner wouldn't find me attractive if he keeps on watching it.
But of course as someone new in a relationship still assessing the situation if it's right or wrong and make sure we're doing okay. It's just that I think it's wrong and right at the same time? I don't know. Does this typically happen in other relationships? What did you guys do? How did you make sure that you and partner will be okay with this set up?
Idk. Can I have your honest reaction and some advices? By the way he's my first bf hehe I hope to have a positive comments with you guys. Thank you!
2024.05.15 12:29 dogickker I'm not really wrapping my head around how having a good personality makes someone sexually attractive to another person
I feel like what I'm about to say is not controversial in "normie" spaces. People don't want to date or sleep with people they don't find physically attractive. I feel like this is the overwhelmingly common experience for human beings. People do not want to date people they don't find physically attractive but had a good personality.
I have asked all my female friends this. I have asked all of my male friends this. The only answer I've gotten that was not a "no" was "if they were super rich and let me mess around on the side" which is basically a no.Especially in my age group (20-25) I don't believe it is at all common or desired to date for women to date someone they are not attracted to. Please don't try to misconstrue this as me saying "women are all shallow b*tches" or whatever.
It also just doesn't make sense to me. One of the few things I'm confident about is my personality. I am funny, I am smart, I am kind and generous. I get invited out a lot and people frequently want to hang out with me. I am fun to be around. (I know protocol for when someone says this here is to not believe them, but this is one thing I am 100% sure about and won't really budge on so I'd suggest just moving on if you're here to doubt that) But women aren't attracted to me. I have two women in my life whom I've been friends with for years that consider me to be their closest friends, they love my personality, yet they're not attracted to me sexually. I've met many women who I thought had amazing personalities but that didn't make me sexually attracted to them. I think for everyone that's not asexual thats how it works.
I think this is normal and commonly accepted everywhere offline out of anti-incel spaces. I think spaces like these just tend to be populated with a lot of demisexual women who don't have the typical view on things like attraction and dating. Which isn't a bad thing and an alternate perspective on dating can be helpful, but when you're missing a full dynamic of dating, it becomes a lot simpler and a lot more difficult to advice people who are dealing with the full spectrum of dating issues, especially since less than 1% of the population is asexual let alone demisexual and most men here will not even encounter a demisexual woman.
And most probably wouldn't want to date a demisexual woman. I wouldn't because I want to be with someone who thinks I'm attractive for other reasons than my personality. I don't want to be in a relationship where a woman has to justify her attraction to me by saying "he's so nice". I think that's fair, I want my partner to sexually desire me so not only does the "all it takes is personality" not makes sense to me, it just doesn't seem appealing or like it would make me feel good about myself.
submitted by dogickker to exredpill [link] [comments]
I have asked all my female friends this. I have asked all of my male friends this. The only answer I've gotten that was not a "no" was "if they were super rich and let me mess around on the side" which is basically a no.Especially in my age group (20-25) I don't believe it is at all common or desired to date for women to date someone they are not attracted to. Please don't try to misconstrue this as me saying "women are all shallow b*tches" or whatever.
It also just doesn't make sense to me. One of the few things I'm confident about is my personality. I am funny, I am smart, I am kind and generous. I get invited out a lot and people frequently want to hang out with me. I am fun to be around. (I know protocol for when someone says this here is to not believe them, but this is one thing I am 100% sure about and won't really budge on so I'd suggest just moving on if you're here to doubt that) But women aren't attracted to me. I have two women in my life whom I've been friends with for years that consider me to be their closest friends, they love my personality, yet they're not attracted to me sexually. I've met many women who I thought had amazing personalities but that didn't make me sexually attracted to them. I think for everyone that's not asexual thats how it works.
I think this is normal and commonly accepted everywhere offline out of anti-incel spaces. I think spaces like these just tend to be populated with a lot of demisexual women who don't have the typical view on things like attraction and dating. Which isn't a bad thing and an alternate perspective on dating can be helpful, but when you're missing a full dynamic of dating, it becomes a lot simpler and a lot more difficult to advice people who are dealing with the full spectrum of dating issues, especially since less than 1% of the population is asexual let alone demisexual and most men here will not even encounter a demisexual woman.
And most probably wouldn't want to date a demisexual woman. I wouldn't because I want to be with someone who thinks I'm attractive for other reasons than my personality. I don't want to be in a relationship where a woman has to justify her attraction to me by saying "he's so nice". I think that's fair, I want my partner to sexually desire me so not only does the "all it takes is personality" not makes sense to me, it just doesn't seem appealing or like it would make me feel good about myself.
2024.05.15 12:28 Clydie3e Some advices...
Just a starter, guys. Please whatever I put in here I hope to get an honest advices and not discrimination and negative words.
I (20m) and my bf (23m) had a talk last time regarding watching 🌽 because I felt like when you're watching 🌽 it makes me feel useless and you don't want me to the things to spice things up (I know this sound inappropriate but I hope you guys understand what I'm saying). (Just a little background) When we start dating- well until now- I talk to him openly that watching 🌽 is a bad for men (in general) as it can make your body depend on it and won't feel to make love your partner as the time goes by, but it's okay if once in a while.
So back to the present times, I talk to him again openly and ask him if he still watch 🌽 and he said that sometimes he looks at it and eventually will remember what we've talk about so he will stop it. Then I mentioned to him that "you know what, after thingking about our conversation I think it's okay specially when we're together all the times and your body needs to release it". And to be honest I also have the tempt to look at it and watch it but it feels like wrong.
Maybe it's just me thingking of jealousy that maybe one day my partner wouldn't find me attractive if he keeps on watching it.
Idk. Can I have your honest reaction and some advices? By the way he's my first bf hehe I hope to have a positive comments with you guys. Thank you!
submitted by Clydie3e to relationships_advice [link] [comments]
I (20m) and my bf (23m) had a talk last time regarding watching 🌽 because I felt like when you're watching 🌽 it makes me feel useless and you don't want me to the things to spice things up (I know this sound inappropriate but I hope you guys understand what I'm saying). (Just a little background) When we start dating- well until now- I talk to him openly that watching 🌽 is a bad for men (in general) as it can make your body depend on it and won't feel to make love your partner as the time goes by, but it's okay if once in a while.
So back to the present times, I talk to him again openly and ask him if he still watch 🌽 and he said that sometimes he looks at it and eventually will remember what we've talk about so he will stop it. Then I mentioned to him that "you know what, after thingking about our conversation I think it's okay specially when we're together all the times and your body needs to release it". And to be honest I also have the tempt to look at it and watch it but it feels like wrong.
Maybe it's just me thingking of jealousy that maybe one day my partner wouldn't find me attractive if he keeps on watching it.
Idk. Can I have your honest reaction and some advices? By the way he's my first bf hehe I hope to have a positive comments with you guys. Thank you!
2024.05.15 12:28 dogickker I'm not really wrapping my head around how having a good personality makes someone sexually attractive to another person
I feel like what I'm about to say is not controversial in "normie" spaces. People don't want to date or sleep with people they don't find physically attractive. I feel like this is the overwhelmingly common experience for human beings. People do not want to date people they don't find physically attractive but had a good personality.
I have asked all my female friends this. I have asked all of my male friends this. The only answer I've gotten that was not a "no" was "if they were super rich and let me mess around on the side" which is basically a no.Especially in my age group (20-25) I don't believe it is at all common or desired to date for women to date someone they are not attracted to. Please don't try to misconstrue this as me saying "women are all shallow b*tches" or whatever.
It also just doesn't make sense to me. One of the few things I'm confident about is my personality. I am funny, I am smart, I am kind and generous. I get invited out a lot and people frequently want to hang out with me. I am fun to be around. (I know protocol for when someone says this here is to not believe them, but this is one thing I am 100% sure about and won't really budge on so I'd suggest just moving on if you're here to doubt that) But women aren't attracted to me. I have two women in my life whom I've been friends with for years that consider me to be their closest friends, they love my personality, yet they're not attracted to me sexually. I've met many women who I thought had amazing personalities but that didn't make me sexually attracted to them. I think for everyone that's not asexual thats how it works.
I think this is normal and commonly accepted everywhere offline out of anti-incel spaces. I think spaces like these just tend to be populated with a lot of demisexual women who don't have the typical view on things like attraction and dating. Which isn't a bad thing and an alternate perspective on dating can be helpful, but when you're missing a full dynamic of dating, it becomes a lot simpler and a lot more difficult to advice people who are dealing with the full spectrum of dating issues, especially since less than 1% of the population is asexual let alone demisexual and most men here will not even encounter a demisexual woman.
And most probably wouldn't want to date a demisexual woman. I wouldn't because I want to be with someone who thinks I'm attractive for other reasons than my personality. I don't want to be in a relationship where a woman has to justify her attraction to me by saying "he's so nice". I think that's fair, I want my partner to sexually desire me so not only does the "all it takes is personality" not makes sense to me, it just doesn't seem appealing or like it would make me feel good about myself.
submitted by dogickker to IncelExit [link] [comments]
I have asked all my female friends this. I have asked all of my male friends this. The only answer I've gotten that was not a "no" was "if they were super rich and let me mess around on the side" which is basically a no.Especially in my age group (20-25) I don't believe it is at all common or desired to date for women to date someone they are not attracted to. Please don't try to misconstrue this as me saying "women are all shallow b*tches" or whatever.
It also just doesn't make sense to me. One of the few things I'm confident about is my personality. I am funny, I am smart, I am kind and generous. I get invited out a lot and people frequently want to hang out with me. I am fun to be around. (I know protocol for when someone says this here is to not believe them, but this is one thing I am 100% sure about and won't really budge on so I'd suggest just moving on if you're here to doubt that) But women aren't attracted to me. I have two women in my life whom I've been friends with for years that consider me to be their closest friends, they love my personality, yet they're not attracted to me sexually. I've met many women who I thought had amazing personalities but that didn't make me sexually attracted to them. I think for everyone that's not asexual thats how it works.
I think this is normal and commonly accepted everywhere offline out of anti-incel spaces. I think spaces like these just tend to be populated with a lot of demisexual women who don't have the typical view on things like attraction and dating. Which isn't a bad thing and an alternate perspective on dating can be helpful, but when you're missing a full dynamic of dating, it becomes a lot simpler and a lot more difficult to advice people who are dealing with the full spectrum of dating issues, especially since less than 1% of the population is asexual let alone demisexual and most men here will not even encounter a demisexual woman.
And most probably wouldn't want to date a demisexual woman. I wouldn't because I want to be with someone who thinks I'm attractive for other reasons than my personality. I don't want to be in a relationship where a woman has to justify her attraction to me by saying "he's so nice". I think that's fair, I want my partner to sexually desire me so not only does the "all it takes is personality" not makes sense to me, it just doesn't seem appealing or like it would make me feel good about myself.
2024.05.15 12:21 Major-Ambassador-512 Insecurities of a tall Indian girl
So this whole thing might sound silly but hear me out please.
Im a 5’9” tall girl and have faced the usual tall-person problems throughout life. I know its not tall per se by international standards but seeing girls my height or above is like spotting a rare animal in the wild. The usual comments from aunties, while growing up, was “kitni lambi horahi hai, shaadi nahi hogi tumhari aise”
“Tumhare paer kitne bade hai, ladko jaise”
The boys I had a crush on were uncomfortable being with me because they were insecure of being the same height. All this may have contributed in my fear of not being “feminine enough”.
Just for context- Im usually considered attractive by people around me and Im married to a wonderful guy (who is the same height), who thinks I look great too. Technically I should be happy with all this. But maybe the years of teasing gets to me.I have a tough personality so it may seem to others that I dont need much caring. Also my parents were very against me marrying a guy of my height “because I looked bigger and more mature than the guy”.
I look at my husband sometimes and wonder “would he have looked better with a small petite girl?” “Do I look weird sitting on his lap and not fitting in it snugly?”
If you are a guy whos with a girl of the same height, I’d love to know what you think of the girl not being the archetypal “short and cute” that men feel protective towards.
A funny incident- I was once stuck in a bad local train rush during the rains. It was getting impossible to get down at the station and the ladies were pushing and fighting. When my short friend who was getting suffocated, started crying, the ladies felt bad and let her get down at her station. When mine came and I asked, they continued to elbow my ribs and said “you are tall, you’ll manage”. It was partially true lol but I was also in pain and scared (I was 16 then).
Whenever I see posts of men being angry that girls want only tall guys, I wonder if they realize their own prejudices/preferences too. I’ve accepted that tall men prefer short girls in general. Might be an evolutionary thing. I focused my attention towards the men who find my height attractive. But I wish I can get rid of this insecure voice that makes me question if my husband will ever want to “protect me”. I may look Amazonian but I am just a lil girl when I’m around him who wants to be cared for.🥹
submitted by Major-Ambassador-512 to indiasocial [link] [comments]
Im a 5’9” tall girl and have faced the usual tall-person problems throughout life. I know its not tall per se by international standards but seeing girls my height or above is like spotting a rare animal in the wild. The usual comments from aunties, while growing up, was “kitni lambi horahi hai, shaadi nahi hogi tumhari aise”
“Tumhare paer kitne bade hai, ladko jaise”
The boys I had a crush on were uncomfortable being with me because they were insecure of being the same height. All this may have contributed in my fear of not being “feminine enough”.
Just for context- Im usually considered attractive by people around me and Im married to a wonderful guy (who is the same height), who thinks I look great too. Technically I should be happy with all this. But maybe the years of teasing gets to me.I have a tough personality so it may seem to others that I dont need much caring. Also my parents were very against me marrying a guy of my height “because I looked bigger and more mature than the guy”.
I look at my husband sometimes and wonder “would he have looked better with a small petite girl?” “Do I look weird sitting on his lap and not fitting in it snugly?”
If you are a guy whos with a girl of the same height, I’d love to know what you think of the girl not being the archetypal “short and cute” that men feel protective towards.
A funny incident- I was once stuck in a bad local train rush during the rains. It was getting impossible to get down at the station and the ladies were pushing and fighting. When my short friend who was getting suffocated, started crying, the ladies felt bad and let her get down at her station. When mine came and I asked, they continued to elbow my ribs and said “you are tall, you’ll manage”. It was partially true lol but I was also in pain and scared (I was 16 then).
Whenever I see posts of men being angry that girls want only tall guys, I wonder if they realize their own prejudices/preferences too. I’ve accepted that tall men prefer short girls in general. Might be an evolutionary thing. I focused my attention towards the men who find my height attractive. But I wish I can get rid of this insecure voice that makes me question if my husband will ever want to “protect me”. I may look Amazonian but I am just a lil girl when I’m around him who wants to be cared for.🥹
2024.05.15 12:16 Clear_Expression_418 Is it true BM don’t date BW in LA? If you’re a BM in LA, why do you think that is?
I’m moving to LA from Texas, and one of my friends who lived in Los Angeles for about five years, told me that as a black woman, black men avoided dating her while she was there. She’s dark skin, and really beautiful, but she said her experience when going out to bars and clubs in LA that Black men never approached her as well as other friends of hers also happen to be darker skinned. She decided to move back to Texas because of it. I thought this was a phenomenon only she was experiencing, but then I started reading other articles and having conversations with other black women who live in LA and they’ve all said the same thing. Many often stating that when they were out with their lighter skinned friends, men were constantly flocking towards their group, but they personally often felt disregarded or ignored.
My question is: What happens when Black men arrive to LA that causes them to avoid dating black women? Is it a status symbol? Are they being compensated by non-black women to be in relationships with them? Is the way they’re perceived in non-black spaces elevated when with a non-black woman? These may seem like naïve questions, but I just can’t understand why one would strongly avoid a space that feels like home, when every other space is clearly against their existence. I know this is a controversial question that may cause defenses to go up. However, my desire is to live in a place that fully sees ALL of me. Yes, my attractiveness, but the totality of who I am. Concerned that I may just end up being invisible in LA. 😔
Lastly, I know this question may also ruffle feathers by non-black men and women alike. Please know that my curiosity about this is not about your erasure, but about our peace of mind. This question is specifically addressed to black men. I’m trying to gain a deeper understanding of what their experiences are while in LA that may be shaping their decision-making process. Specifically seeking feedback from them to offer clearer insight. If this is not your personal lived experience, please feel free to disregard. However, I’m sure the answers black men share will illuminate so much for black women moving there, or currently living there. Grateful this can be an open forum, and any acts of misogynoir or hate speech will be respectfully addressed by the moderator.
… And thank you Black Men for sharing your experiences.✨
submitted by Clear_Expression_418 to AskLosAngeles [link] [comments]
My question is: What happens when Black men arrive to LA that causes them to avoid dating black women? Is it a status symbol? Are they being compensated by non-black women to be in relationships with them? Is the way they’re perceived in non-black spaces elevated when with a non-black woman? These may seem like naïve questions, but I just can’t understand why one would strongly avoid a space that feels like home, when every other space is clearly against their existence. I know this is a controversial question that may cause defenses to go up. However, my desire is to live in a place that fully sees ALL of me. Yes, my attractiveness, but the totality of who I am. Concerned that I may just end up being invisible in LA. 😔
Lastly, I know this question may also ruffle feathers by non-black men and women alike. Please know that my curiosity about this is not about your erasure, but about our peace of mind. This question is specifically addressed to black men. I’m trying to gain a deeper understanding of what their experiences are while in LA that may be shaping their decision-making process. Specifically seeking feedback from them to offer clearer insight. If this is not your personal lived experience, please feel free to disregard. However, I’m sure the answers black men share will illuminate so much for black women moving there, or currently living there. Grateful this can be an open forum, and any acts of misogynoir or hate speech will be respectfully addressed by the moderator.
… And thank you Black Men for sharing your experiences.✨