Aches under armpits

I had 3 core needle (14-gauge) biopsies to my estimated 17mm mass on 5/3. Was diagnosed with IDC (and DCIS) grade 2 a few days later. It still hurts, as in it aches on and off.
For context, my mass was found on a baseline mammogram. I’m 37. I had that mammogram the same day as my annual women’s exam so had just had a clinic breast exam and nothing was felt. I was just going about my life with no symptoms.
I expected some bruising and pain after the biopsy, for sure. But it feels like it irritated the mass so damn much. I can now feel it quite easily and it seems closer to golf ball size. The pain radiates toward my armpit and also down to my ribs right under my breast. My mass is at 1 o’clock a couple cm from my nipple and I have small deflated breasts post-breastfeeding.
Why is it still so swollen and painful? It’s not hindering my daily life or anything but it is annoying. Just a low grade 2 or 3 out of 10 pain that never goes away.
I haven’t had my first oncology appointment and I’m trying to switch to my preferred team (all at the same NCI designated comprehensive cancer center) so I don’t have a doctor to ask this about just yet. So to the internet I go!

So I’ve been having chest pains since nov 2023, saw a cardiologist got cleared I am 7 m postpartum I have SEVERE anxiety and ocd, so….. I get chest pain in my center slightly to the lower left.. kind of where you think your heart is.. it’s like bad heart burn with pressure sometimes just in that spot, it can be stabbing or when I don’t feel bad pain it just feels dull ache there at like a 3 pain level, or I feel it in my center between my breast OR, I feel it in my upper center chest or near my armpit and chest where they connect or rarely under my boob sometimes I have flutters and it’s worse near my period or during and it’s pretty bad when I’m under a lot of stress or extreme anger or sadness..

Hello! I am a 28 year old male. I just spent 6 days admitted to the hospital with concerns about a cardiac event because I was having facial parasthesia (tingling, numbness), the same sensation in my left arm and to a less frequent extent, my right arm. I also experience lower jaw and tooth pain, but I can’t tell if this is a symptom or if it is secondary to the swollen tonsils and adenoids.
For context, my wife and son recently got sick. My wife was very sick. Enough so that she sometimes cried about how much her throat hurt and even got a couple of chest x-rays for pneumonia. She was tested for every common illness because she had an insanely painful sore throat, a VERY bad cough, a whisper quiet lost voice and her tonsils were huge. The only result that showed was that she had a past EBV infection at some point.
I also got sick, of course. However, things went differently for me. I got sick and developed a bad sorrow throat and that was about it. This continues to this day, which is 12 days later. It’s still quite bad. My tonsils are also huge, but not as big as they were. I have tonsil secretions but I had more before.
A few days into my sore throat, my left face began to tingle. It was… weird. No pain, nothing else really. Just tingle. Later on in the day, my lip went numb. I went to the ER thinking that I was stroking out or something but the CT was fine and they sent me home.
The very next day, my left arm started to tingle and hurt and my arm starting from under my armpit medially(if supinated) running down my upper arm but not below my elbow started to ache. My shoulder had sensations of cold as well. The tinglng sensation continues and it runs down to my hand where I feel pain that that travels around but is mainly in my palm, thumb and fourth/fifth finger. This also occurs in my right arm. In fact, it’s happening right now. Both sides of my face are tingling as well.
To be clear, Yale’s cardiology team did a very extensive workup including s PET/CT nuclear stress test, echocardiogram, several EKG’s, maybe a dozen troponins a chest X-ray. No cardiac pathology was revealed. The only thing that was somewhat weird is that my symptoms were alleviated several times by nitroglycerin, but this may very well be psychosomatic due to my extreme anxiety over it being cardiac in nature and causing panjc attacks that the nitroglycerin calmed by lowering my BP and distracting me with low BP symptoms, honestly. I am a very anxious individual and I was very laser focused on it being cardiac pain because of the location. So much so that I did not even think of the possibility of my illness being related during my hospitalization. They did test me for strep and COVID and it was negative but given the fact that my wife was negative for EBV, they did not think it necessary.
I am wondering if perhaps this mystery infection could have triggered GBS? I do see a neurologist but my closest available appointment is three months from now.
So, what do you fine people think? Do these symptoms sound like potential GBS? If so, would gabapentin help? How can I go about making this easier for myself? I do have an RX for that. Thanks for reading.

Some info: 22F, currently taking prescribed lithium, birth control, and perindiprol for over two years History of high blood pressure, and mood disorder (both stabilised for a long time)
About 7 months ago I started getting extreme fatigue and generally feeling unwell to the point where tasks such as hygiene had to be spaced out over days instead of all being able to be done in one day as usual, I felt like I couldn't get off the couch because I was so physically exhausted. I started losing my appetite around that time too and felt sick eating.
I went to the doctor in January because forcing myself to get up wasn't working and I was offered antidepressants. I said I didn't want to go on them because I knew this wasn't an issue with depression as I've experienced it in the past and my mood was still perfectly fine. Blood test results came back and they had slightly high iron (resolved by itself) and slightly low vitamin D.
I then started getting a stabbing pain right undedirectly next to the bottom of my left rib. This wasn't constant, but it was multiple times a day and extremely painful, when it wasn't there it was usually an ache. I also started getting short of breath very easily and when I tried to sleep I would struggle because I couldn't breathe properly (I've gotten used to how to put my pillows to make it easier now)
I went to the doctor for this in February and he ordered a chest X ray which came back with "unknown densities in the lungs" and prescribed me antibiotics which didn't work and I went back which he prescribed another round with penicillin free which didn't work.
Around this time the lymph nodes under my jaw started swelling. After about a couple of weeks, more started swelling in my neck and on my collarbones which were smaller ones.
I started having a low grade fever for an extended period of time and I went to the doctor in early April and asked about my lymph nodes where he did an examination and checked all of them except what was in my collarbones. I got an ultrasound which said they were most likely reactive in origin and to repeat in three months if not resolved.
I went back to the doctor last week and ordered a blood test again hoping I could at least find what's wrong to fix it and asked for a test for EBV which my bloods said that everything is okay and EBV was a previous infection.
Throughout this whole experience I feel like my doctor isn't listening to me because he keeps cutting me off and disregarding the majority of what I have to say which I don't understand because I've seen him since I was 14 and have never come with an issue like this before. He's been a really good doctor in the past, but at the moment it feels like I'm just being rushed. For example, the first time I had gone for the blood test, he told me if it comes back fine I'm just being a sook. Or when I tried to explain that I was having pains, he cut me off to say that he didn't ask what type of pain I was feeling and ignored what I was saying all together.
At this point I am still have extreme fatigue, it feels like something is pressing on my throat, I'm still short of breath with chest pains and a dry cough, my lymph nodes have gotten bigger and have moved to my right armpit, still getting that pain under my ribs, and I've lost 15kg (was slightly overweight, still in the healthy weight range)
I don't really know where to go from here and it all feels a bit hopeless, so I was wondering if there's anything I can do to make this better or figure out what's going on so I can get it treated. It's really hard and I don't think I'm being taken seriously, but I have to deal with this 24/7 and it's really hard.
Any advice would really be appreciated, thank you :)

Hello! I (27F, Caucasian, 189lbs, 5’4) apologize in advance as this is my first ever Reddit post and I am a little nervous, so please feel free to remove if any rules are broken.
I am currently struggling with a range of unusual sudden symptoms that have me worried as to whether or not what I am experiencing is a nerve injury of sorts or if it falls under the category of neurodegenerative/neuromuscular disorders. I do not know where to begin so I will start from the beginning (I apologize if it is lengthy):
**January 2024*\*
*Jan. 11^th, 2024*
-I get a sudden, intense, shooting pain in the back of my head along my cervical spine which causes me extreme pain, discomfort, and nausea to the point that I was unable to get out of bed as it would shoot around the back of my head and into my jaw.
-This makes me develop sudden weakness all along my left arm and shoulder as well as a sudden pain that shoots down the arm and into my wrist.
*Jan. 18^th, 2024*
-Along with shooting pain, I get a minor case of Bell’s Palsy which promptly went away with the help of medication as per the ER doctors’ orders (went to ER the morning after it happened).
*Jan. 28^th, 2024*
-I go back to ER for a follow-up and explain the worsening nerve/back of head and neck pain situation.
-They do a CT without contrast of my head and sinuses (due to the neck/back of head pain situation) and given an all clear.
**February 2024*\*
-Pain behind neck, head, and back worsens to the point that I missed several university classes and work because of severe headaches, nausea, wobbly vision, and arm weakness.
-My primary care physician tells me it's nothing and to go home.
*Feb. 14^th, 2024*
-Pain, nausea, and headache from whatever is happening behind my neck causes me to go to the ER where I do a CT without contrast of my cervical spine (C1-D1) which ended up showing (and I'm quoting the results directly):

• Mild intervertebral disc space narrowing and early-right side uncarthrosis (c4-c5)
• Mild intervertebral disc space narrowing and early bilateral uncarthrosis, right more than left (c5-c6)
• Mild intervertebral disc space narrowing with very minimal posterior disc osteophyte complex (c6-D1).
• Reversal of the normal cervical lordosis with kyphosis centered around c5-c6).

-I was simply referred to physio,
**March 2024*\*
-Weakness and shoulder, neck, and back pain persist but the headaches and nausea subside. Eventually, the pain becomes less intense but the weakness throughout the shoulder, neck, and arm continues.
*March 19^th, 2024*
-My doctor. finally reluctantly referred me to a neurologist where I do nerve conduction study of both my arms, hands, and face (my doctor initially thought I had peripheral neuralgia). I also do needle EMG on my left arm from the wrist up to the neck. The neurologist says I should wear braces for carpal and cubital tunnel syndrome (not new information, have known this for years) but that I am showing symptoms of cervical radiculopathy on my left side and need physio.
-A few days later, I developed odd fasciculations and spasming all over my body including the left side of my jaw which were relentless until they subsided on their own about two weeks later.
**April 2024*\*
*April 18^th/20^th, 2024 (Somewhere between that time I do not remember the dates)*
- I do not know if it is because I messed up at the gym, have terrible posture, and sit on my laptop too much because of finals and work and all that, or because I slept on the couch in a weird position that essentially compressed my entire left side), I really hurt myself. Symptoms start with:

• Intense burning pain behind/above the elbows, (which I initially thought was just me exacerbating my cubital tunnel syndrome as it has happened before) but then suddenly it became so painful I was nauseous.
• Further weakness in my left arm/shoulder. Developed wobbly wrists, a wobbly pinky when I try to press it onto my thumb (left more than right), shooting and burning pain up and down my arm, and burning and pins and needles in my shoulder blade, left side of my back down to my ribs when I would lie down on my back or left side.
• Trying to sleep on my right side causes me to mess up my elbow and shoulder on that side too (though not same extent as my left) and wobbly.
• Unusual throbbing, trembling rippling sensations in the back rippling from left lumbathoratic spine outward. Same thing in my shoulder blade on left side.
• Weird rippling sensation of pressure/dull squishing aches that rippled down my arms to the point that they made my wrists ripple.
• Burning/shooting pain near clavicle going down to under armpit, more so on left and right, as well as more pain in the neck.
• Unable to get up from seated/lying down position without having knees tremble and limp. Walking over the next few days worried me as I was afraid I would just drop because my knees felt like jelly. This has since subsided and I'm feeling fine and overall walking normally again.
• I had an appointment with another doctor (unrelated reason) where I also mentioned the jelly knees and the spasm/fasciculation situation from March and she said that could a be neuromuscular disorder.

**May 2024*\*
*May 1^st, 2024*
-These sensations persist so I go to ER. Doctor did cervical spine X-Ray (showed nothing), as well as an ultrasound of my lungs, liver, spleen, and heart (all clear), as well as regular blood tests to check the basics, CBCs, clotting (all good in terms of bloodwork). All the doctor ended up telling me is that everything looks fine and hopefully this goes away on its own but if it continues for another 4-6 months it might be a neuromuscular disorder. He recommended I follow up with a family doctor.
*May 5^th, 2024*
My primary care doctor says I’m stressing for nothing, and sends me home within 5 minutes.
-I get an emergency same-day appointment at another clinic where the doctor prescribed me naproxen and told me that my trap muscles were just tight, and I needed a massage. Tells me I do not need any CT scans, MRIs, or follow-ups with a neurologist.
*May 5^th, 2024-Present*
-Symptoms have subsided however the deep shooting elbow pain persists sometimes, as does the squeezing/ rippling in both my arms. Left side aches/ burns from the cervical spine down, sometimes causing headaches and I feel it in my jaw and my ear, but also between my back. My shoulder still shakes and now my hand just trembles on its own sometimes depending on what I’m doing. I no longer have continuous intense full-body tremors nor excessive pins and needles and burning in my shoulder blades but I still have exacerbated weakness in my arm and hand and I think now on the right side too. Furthermore, I noticed that I only get weird sensations (like muscle spasms? fasciculations? I don't know) on my back depending on how soft the surface I
-Sometimes I get buzzing/ fluttering around/behind my knees, in the creases where each thigh meets the pelvis (like at the front, not between legs), on my butt, and occasionally, on my sternum.
Note:
-So far, I have not lost any strength since January, I carry/hold stuff without issue though not anything too heavy on either arm because I feel a painful burn shoot from my neck down my shoulders and my left shoulder is killing me (like burning). I do not know what atrophy feels or looks like (but I think my left arm/wrist area) is weaker than my right given how my left wrist shakes, also bending my left wrist causes weird pain that happens around my arm).
-My left arm/side is my dominant side.
-I also have another appointment with a different doctor tomorrow at a private clinic because my doctor said I’m stressing for nothing. Although I am getting another doctor tomorrow, I was wondering if this is ALS or some neurodegenerative situation or if could it be the result of an injury? What steps do I take?
Thank you so much and apologies for the lengthy post. Have a great Sunday!

I had strong infection in August including swollen lymph node under armpit.
Woke up one day back then with my body on fire. Since then my symptoms include:

• whole body aches
• my back feels like its messed up, when I take breathe I feel stabbing pain in lots of areas, assymetry, even I feel deep stinging pain in throat/ear when I take breathe
• right shoulder pain, itching like neuropathy
• stabbing pains in face, head, ears
• burning eyes face
• redness on face, hot flushing, Red ears
• feeling of pain and asymmetry when walking
• deep pains in spine
• whole body pins needles, for example when I put on my clothes
• face skin eyelid twitching, scalp also, like electric shocks and skin jumping on head and face when I touch IT
• heatwaves burning on body mostly on evenings
• hives
• deep burning and hot feeling in legs and fingers
• whole body electric shocks, neuropathy so severe its painful to move my eyes
• bugs crawling under my skin
• constant phlegm/ post nasal drip

9 months of suffering. Only small improvement. Gabapentin, pregabalin, antihistamines without improvement. Good bloodwork. What should I do next?
Its hell, I dont want to wake up anymore. Im trapped inside my body.

Title says it all really. I have been suffering with health anxiety for as long as I can remember but it went away for a few years before coming back with a vengeance a couple years ago. Recently though, I just don't wonna get out of bed and do anything. I wake up and immediately dread the day ahead and I just wonna curl up on the sofa under a blanket and not do anything. It's horrible. I never actually do this cos i gotta go to work so I force myself to go.
​
My sleep is terrible and I am constantly in and out of it during the night, my anxiety is telling me I have cancer whenever I feel any type of sensation (which is basically all the time) and my diet is awful because I can't be bothered to cook or eat anything that requires effort to make. My acid reflux is on another level as well and I dunno what is going on with my throat and chest but my throat has a lump in it and my chest feels like something is on it and it is uncomfortable as fuck. Feels like I am winded or something.
​
I have an appointment with a therapist this month and I also contacted my GP about the chesty throat feeling and acid reflux but my appointment isn't till 16th June. I feel so hopeless. I ache everywhere all the fucking time and I just want a hug or something. I feel like my whole body is inflamed, my shoulder blades hurt, my neck hurts, my back hurts... heck even my fucking armpits hurt. I feel like I'm a write off and I'm only 28.

Title says it all really. I have been suffering with health anxiety for as long as I can remember but it went away for a few years before coming back with a vengeance a couple years ago. Recently though, I just don't wonna get out of bed and do anything. I wake up and immediately dread the day ahead and I just wonna curl up on the sofa under a blanket and not do anything. It's horrible. I never actually do this cos i gotta go to work so I force myself to go.
​
My sleep is terrible and I am constantly in and out of it during the night, my anxiety is telling me I have cancer whenever I feel any type of sensation (which is basically all the time) and my diet is awful because I can't be bothered to cook or eat anything that requires effort to make. My acid reflux is on another level as well and I dunno what is going on with my throat and chest but my throat has a lump in it and my chest feels like something is on it and it is uncomfortable as fuck. Feels like I am winded or something.
​
I have an appointment with a therapist this month and I also contacted my GP about the chesty throat feeling and acid reflux but my appointment isn't till 16th June. I feel so hopeless. I ache everywhere all the fucking time and I just want a hug or something. I feel like my whole body is inflamed, my shoulder blades hurt, my neck hurts, my back hurts... heck even my fucking armpits hurt. I feel like I'm a write off and I'm only 28.

This is not finished and is written out of order so I may write part one one day and part two another they are ment to have diffrent style and be a bit bad.
Old Testiment as Written By Sir Eddie Murphy
Genesis
With his hands and ass cheeks he created our universe and infused it with life. He did this after he had one too many chicken Alfredos; the rupture caused him to poop with such force it caused a bang. A big bang. The bang caused earth to form. At this time it was just an empty wasteland with no life. However shrek with his omnibevelence wiped his ass with earth after the great shart. This invigorated the earth with things such as the grass and dirt we stand on and the cow birds and Mexicans we see. Shrek saw the earth and saw it was good. He named it the great onion in the sky. Finally Shrek created the things that mortal men can not see. Feelings. Hunger and thirst among other things. The reason shrek created hunger and feelings of sadness is that he new with his omniscience that they would lead to the creation of the chicken Alfredos form before. With this shrek created death as all must have an opposite and death is the unlucky opposite of life. This pained shrek to see his beloved creatures die so he created an afterlife so great and unfathomable that no mortal human could understand. This was named the great Taco Bell beyond the sky. With this creation he came down to the earth and formed the only country's the UK, Beeston, Spain, Saudi Arabia, Bramley and Australia however that has now been destroyed.
Early workings
After shrek made the world and lit it up with the stars in the night sky. He made the first human a man of pure faith and love for all who love shrek. Butter pants. Butter pants was sent down to watch the inhabitants and what they do, for shrek gave them free will. Butter pants became restless however after some time and so was given from shrek a wife and here was the first woman. Lois Griffin. They spent thier days with shrek on earth. Playing, telling stories and overall living a carefree life. After some time butter pants and lois griffin had kids. Three children Bob sob and George and in thier childhood they lived much the same as their perants. However, when they grew up they began to become more restless. Arguments rose and fell quickly like sparks. The three boys began to despise not just each other but thier family and shrek. This lead to the three boys leaving shrek to live somewhere else they all set off alone in diffrent directions. After many more years of distance to shrek the three boys began to forget. Not thier anger towards each other, although the argument that started had been lost, but their love for shrek. However one day one of the three boys sob discided to meet again with shrek for a request. "Lord please give me mercy for I beg of you a wife or a child". The Lord forgave sob and bestowed on him a child. The best ever seen. Three years past and the child named Mr bean was showing incredible intelligence and was growing quickly and nicely. Sob had now reconciled with lois and butter pants and they lived happily with each other. But the other boys became jealous and planned to kill Mr bean at night. Late one night they set thier plan into action and when all were asleep they suffocated the child without a sound. However with some sixth sense butter pants woke up and ran into the room to see his beloved dead. Feelings of anger, hate, sadness and distress fell over him like a great weight. He screamed and shouted at the boys and them tried to get his revenge. And after a while of fighting sob killed George. Shrek awoke along with lois griffin and he stormed into the room. "What have you done you animals" shrek screamed the boys did nothing for they saw the power of shrek never seen by man. "You live a life without me and you murder directly going against my will. For this you shall be punished as one of the weak in the world already unforgiven as blind mice together with the lost George. I leave you now for I never knew you".
The the aftermath
Shrek sent down along with lois and butter pants many men and woman to earth and split them out across the lands. Story's of shrek were told but they were eventually lost or warped beyond repair. Many generation came and when developing with the lost power of shrek. Because of this lost power they now fought with new pains. However shrek still loved humanity. The three blind mice lived as a testament to shreks wrath although they were seen as a legend and two the human eye seen as just mice.
To worship shrek
Shrek must be worshiped in a shrek church (an onion shaped dome to signify the warm and layers shrek brings to us) and do the Thug Shake. Hymns can also be sung like All Star. The shrek community needs to look after one another and this goes for humanity as a whole. The shrek onion is not only a place of worship but a place of giving.
The nature of shrek
Shrek is all powerful and all knowing he sees all that has happened all that is happening and all that will happen. Shrek does not have an age. He is master of all. There before the first silence was broken. He loves all who belive in him. I bear witness their is no God But Shrek.
La historia del pus en las botas
Un momento concreto en el que Eddie estaba difundiendo la buena palabra de shrek en España. Se encontró con un gato solitario; Eddie se apiadó del gato y recordó sus viejos tiempos como un burro normal. Eddie decidió acoger al gato como propio. Durante muchos años entrenó al gato llamándolo pus. El gato dominaba el cuchillo y luchaba contra los criminales de su ciudad. Pus oró para Shrek todos los días y con la ayuda de Eddie abrió un jardín público de cebollas para que la gente comiera y donara. Un día, por gracia de Shrek, le regalaron botas y lo consideraron pus en las botas.
This next segment was made by chatgpt
Title: "The Gingerbread Guardian"
In the quaint village of Sugarlandia, where the scent of freshly baked cookies filled the air, there lived a humble baker named Mrs. Butterbuns. Known far and wide for her delectable treats, Mrs. Butterbuns had a secret ingredient that gave her creations a magical touch: a pinch of stardust harvested from the heavens above. One crisp autumn day, as Mrs. Butterbuns was preparing her famous gingerbread cookies for the annual Harvest Festival, something extraordinary happened. As she sprinkled the stardust into the dough, a tiny spark ignited, and from the oven emerged a gingerbread man unlike any other. With a mischievous grin and a twinkle in his eye, the Gingerbread Guardian came to life, imbued with the wisdom of the stars and a mission to protect the village from harm. As word of the miraculous cookie spread, so too did the tale of the Gingerbread Guardian. Children gathered round to hear stories of his daring adventures, from foiling the plans of the mischievous Candy Bandits to rescuing lost kittens from the treacherous Toffee Swamp. But amidst the laughter and joy, a shadow loomed on the horizon. The wicked Witch of the Wastelands, jealous of the village's prosperity, devised a dastardly scheme to steal the magical stardust for herself. With her army of sugary minions, the witch launched an assault on Sugarlandia, intent on capturing the Gingerbread Guardian and seizing control of his celestial powers. But the people of Sugarlandia refused to surrender without a fight. Armed with rolling pins and cookie cutters, they rallied to the defense of their beloved guardian, standing shoulder to shoulder against the encroaching darkness. In the epic battle that ensued, sugar flew and frosting splattered as the forces of good and evil clashed in a showdown of epic proportions. With courage and determination, the Gingerbread Guardian led the charge, his gingerbread heart ablaze with the fire of righteousness. In the end, it was not brute strength or magic that prevailed, but the power of friendship and unity. Together, the villagers and their guardian vanquished the witch and her minions, restoring peace and harmony to Sugarlandia once more. And so, the legend of the Gingerbread Guardian lived on, a sweet reminder that even the smallest among us can make a difference in the world, one sprinkle of stardust at a time.
The beginning of the shrek religion
For thousands of years shrek kept silent on his existence. Watching over the earth not interfering with anything. This was to wait for the perfect moment when humanity was ready. This fist contact happened happened to Eddie Murphy. Eddie was a poor donkey just like any other. He waited for nothing wandering like a lost soul. He lived on a farm with an farmer however they was not treated equally. Eddie lived outside with no shelter eating grass. While the farmer ate grand feists with his family. Shrek did not like this shrek loved donkey can couldn't sand to see them be treated in such a way. So one day shrek, for the first time ever, came down to Eddie and gave him knowledge, knowledge that no mortal had had to this point. The knowledge to save humanity. With this gift shrek also granted Eddie with the gift of speech. With the help of shrek Eddie managed to jump the fence leading to his freedom from the farmer and into the town square. Their he shouted with glee that he had seen God. "Shrek" "shrek" "that is his name" the people in the town were confused and in awe of seeing a talking donkey. But then from the sky out dropped a seed that dropped next to Eddie's feet. Eddie shouted with all his might "plant this seed as it is the seed of shrek". One of the humans stepped up to pick up thr seed and planted it for Eddie. And when asked his name he said proudly "Farquad". But then from the ground sprouted a large white onion. Eddie raised his voice again "spread the word of shrek as I will. I hope to see you all in the kingdom of shrek." From thier Eddie set off on a voyage to spread the good word of shrek and farquad was appointed leader of the village.
The fall of lord farquad
Under the rule of farquad the village grew quickly. Many people came from around the world to see the great onion. They built holy places to shrek to worship him around the globe. However as the years past religion became less important and lord farquad became more greedy untill life for the people became worse while farquad lived a lavish life forgetting his Shrek given purpose. Until one day Eddie came back to see what had happened to the village. He was shocked to see little to nobody worshiping shrek. They were too busy being over worked by farquad. It seemed like their was nothing Eddie could do so he did what he always did in times of need. Pray. And shrek answered. From the heavens he brought Butter pants. Together with Eddie they came up with a plan to over take lord farquad. Under the blanket of night the three suck into the Palace of lord farquad and into his bedroom. "What are you doing here donkey" lord farquad said "What have you done too the holy land Eddie retorted "What I needed too" shouted lord farquad. But then from the shadows butter pants appeared. "Do the roar" he said. Lord Farquad looked confused. "Do the roar" he repeated many more times untill the annoyance reached its peak. "Shut up" farquad screamed. Farquad had to stop the noise. Somehow and the only way he knew was to jump. "Do the roar" was repeated many more times untill lord farquad had enough and shouted 'ill jump if you don't shut up". The last thing lord farquad heard before he jumped was "Do the roar". The village for years to come became a holy land for all.
The afterlife
Years had past. Eddie was now far from his foal days. He now lived his days in a bed each day shorter of breath and one day closer to death. Untill one day he died with his pussy beside him he prayed. The pain of his heart soon relived and he was sent to the great Taco Bell beyond the sky. There he met shrek. "Sup I'm god" shrek said eating his 4th chalupa that day. Eddie looked around at the Taco Bell. It was all onions. Shrek finished his chalupa and said "Eddie Murphy you are my most trusted. When I one day come down to humanity come with me you are my protector". Eddie left to see what the afterlife offered but their was so much so many layers to go. He met Danny devio. No I will not explain further. Its an after life joke you non afterlife people wouldn't understand.
Pus post Eddie's death
Seeing the death of his parental figure broke pus. However though the clouds he saw shrek who comforted pus during these times. Throughout the day he stopped crime however at night he stayed at the milk bar to the early hours of the morning this behaviour culminated during a night like any other when he was kidnapped. Hours went by in the carriage when pus was finally unmasked. Lord Farquad stood in front of him. Pus had heard stories of farquad and how he died so how could he be here. Pus didn't know all he did know was that he needed to finnish farquad once and for all. Pus thought though all off lord farquads monologue and then remembered. Chalupa. With the chalupa he ate hours ago still in his belly he let rip a fart so loud it could be heard in the great Taco Bell beyond the sky. This riped out his shackles and laughed him straight to farquad. The guards were none the wiser when he snuck behind farquad and pulled his pants down causing farquad to die of embarrassment and crush pus. This act sent pus to the after life wear he met shrek.
The fight of humpty dumpty and butter pants
マスターハンプティダンプティの戦い バターパンツが刀を振り上げた。 「咆哮をやれ」。ハンプティはバターパンツに飽きていて、決闘で彼と1対1を望んでいた。しかし、突然武装を解除されたハンプティーダンプティーに向かって突進したとき、バターパンツにはシュレックとアニメの力が味方していた。 「咆哮するか？」。彼はこれを止められず、何とかこの状況から抜け出す方法を考えなければなりませんでした。そう、彼の天才的な計画は、シュレックの助けなしには誰も思いつきませんでした。それで彼は計画を実行し、ハンプティーダンプティーにぶつかっただけで死んでしまいました。彼は卵であり、したがって非常に弱いからです。
Humpty dumptys return
جلس هامبتي دمبتي على جدار أحد المتاجر وألقى باللوم في إصاباته على السقوط الكبير. كانت ليلة عربية باردة حيث جلس هامبتي دمبتي على جمله في أقصى الصحراء حيث زرع الحبة السحرية. كان يعلم الآن أن بوس وإيدي ماتا ويمكنه العودة.
Ingredients to shrek brownies
You likely already have the ingredients you'll need for these easy brownies on hand:
· Sugar: These easy brownies start with two cups of white sugar. · Flour: All-purpose flour creates structure in the batter. · Butter: Two sticks of melted butter give the brownies moisture and richness. · Eggs: Eggs lend even more moisture. Plus, they help bind the batter together. · Cocoa powder: Of course, you'll need cocoa powder for chocolate brownies! · Vanilla: Vanilla extract enhances the overall flavor of the brownies. · Baking powder: Baking powder acts as a leavener, which means it helps the brownies rise. · Salt: A pinch of salt enhances the flavors of the other ingredients. · Walnuts: Nuts are optional, of course, but they add a welcome crunch.
Shrek orders at Wendy's
"Hello can I please get a baconator with large fries and a coke" he said burping mid way through. "Would you like to make that a meal said the drive through worker. "Yes" So that day shrek got a baconator with large fries and a. Wait they forgot his coke. Shrek was mad however as he is an omnibevelent God he only destroyed the entire country the Wendy's was on. The country was Australia so if you hear anyone say anything about Australia it is your duty to slap them and say shrek got rid of Australia. So moral of the story is. I don't know actually know ummmmm don't forget your coke.
The poem of shrek
Shrek is the one he is our call For he is my love and my soul He is the light to my darkness And the darkness to my light He will bring the world to an end Shrek is love shrek is life
Breaking shrek
"Eddie Murphy we need to cook" said shrek "Yo Mr shrek like zoinks scoob we need lots of meth" shouted Eddie. So for the rest of the day they cooked meth untill the evil hank shrader from the hit TV show Breaking bad showed up "Stop cooking drugs it's bad" "No" said shrek "OK" They lived out the rest off thier days cooking meth and lived happily ever after.
All star
Somebody once told me the world is gonna roll me I ain’t the sharpest tool in the shed ♪ She was lookin’ kind of dumb with her finger and her thumb ♪ In the shape of an "L" on her forehead ♪ The years start comin’ and they don’t stop comin’ ♪ Fed to the rules and I hit the ground runnin’ ♪ Didn’t make sense not to live for fun ♪ Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb ♪ So much to do ♪ So much to see ♪ So what’s wrong with takin’ the backstreets ♪ You’ll never know if you don’t go ♪ You’ll never shine if you don’t glow ♪ Hey, now ♪ You’re an all-star ♪ Get your game on, go play ♪ Hey, now, you’re a rock star ♪ Get the show on, get paid ♪ And all that glitters is gold ♪ Only shootin’ stars break the mold ♪ It’s a cool place and they say it gets colder ♪ You’re bundled up now but wait till you get older ♪ But the meteor men beg to differ ♪ Judging by the hole in the satellite picture ♪ The ice we skate is gettin’ pretty thin ♪ The water’s getting warm so you might as well swim My world’s on fire ♪ How ‘bout yours ♪ That’s the way I like it and I’ll never get bored ♪ Hey now you’re an all-star [shouting] [singing] ♪ Get your game on, go play ♪ Hey, now, you’re a rock star ♪ Get the show on, get paid ♪ And all that glitters is gold ♪ Only shootin’ stars break the mold ♪
Shrek gets added to fortnite
Once upon a time shrek got added to fortnite with the Eddie Murphy backbling and onion glider. "Hello shrek welcome to fortnite" said Peter Griffin hitting a devious griddy. Tehetehe Shrek went on to get the victory Royal with goku lady gaga and bender form futerama.
Got a random guy to write this
Imagine Shrek traveling back in time and encountering a younger version of his great grandfather, Baby Gronk, in the present day. Baby Gronk might be a mischievous but endearing character, possibly with some ogre-like tendencies but in a smaller form. Shrek, with his big heart and sometimes gruff exterior, might find a kindred spirit in Baby Gronk. They could bond over shared family traits, like a love for swampy homes or a penchant for unexpected adventures. It could be a heartwarming story of family connection across generations, showing that even though times and appearances change, some things, like family bonds, remain constant. How does that sound.Part 2 of the shrek Bible as Written By Sir Eddie
The accention
A fine wonderful and enfactuating light pierced though the clouds and sky and down came from the great tacobell on the sky came down shrek. He sat on a great cloud; adorned in a great silk and angel made cloak. All stared at his glory. His figure was surrounded by a radiance he was like the sun all revolved around this moment. The angles followed. They were great celestial being clad in amour and swords but today they lay in modest and with instruments they played a inimagineable song that engrossed all listeners into a trance. Following next was Sir Eddie Murphy now raised from the dead with Pus and the original man Butter Pants. They wore astral clothes as they walked down to earth by seemingly walking on the air. Soon the four Shrek, Pus, Eddie and Butter Pants were on the ground and stood at a market stall. Shrek stood on a box and began to project his voice. "From now untill I die in this mortal form I am all God and all man. I will now see the true life of my most beloved your eyes". All stood in disbelief for thier saviour had come and with that speach shrek became far less intimating his astral light faded. However he still sat in his green ogre form. Shrek ascended down to the UK to begin but shrek new he must go on a voyage across the lands to spread the word of his arrival but he had to get ready. In the oncoming days shrek conversed with the people of the town and finding lay of the land. He mapped out hid journey and the stops he would have to make for food, water or rest and how he play to make it in the elements. However one day he was invited to talk with head of the village. "Shrek" he said in a light tone "it has come to my attention that you plan on leaving the town soon" "Yes that is correct my son" said shrek "There is something that I want you to have" said the head. "A shortsword, it was forged many years ago b- "My son my voyage is of peace and love for one another not a conquest it will not be needed in any extreme case but thank you my lord however I am greatful for your offer". Days more passed when shrek set out quickly and quietly under the setting sun so not to be seen and made a great fuss however he left a note in the home he was staying in giving them the information they needed but by then he would be far gone.
The journey to Beeston
Shrek walked happily and care free for some time untill he came to the beginning of a forest. The trees were tall and imposing and it was as if the branches were pointing at him to leave like a warning. At this time the sun was beginning to set and the night was dark. Going around would surely add time to his journey and eat into his food and water supply and so would waiting outside for daytime. Shrek had thought about this before setting out about a week prior and had deicided to enter the forest however now as it towerd over him he felt true fear. Shrek thought for a while as the sun fully set and the moon took its place and finally stepped his foot into the forest. As he walked foreboding stalked him and shrek could get no peace; he would look around for danger but the darkness And the fog clouded his vision. He could bearly see the hands infront of him. But after some miles his body caved and he set camp for the night. His legs ached and his body shaked the warmth of his sleeping bag couldn't satisfy the sharp coolness he felt. Shrek fell asleep that night cold and wet wishing he was home but he knew he needed to do this for humanity. Fragments of light broke though the shaded trees although the forest was cold as most light couldn't get though. The fog was still about him but was lessened from the night before. The air was sharp and shreks fear palpable. He still felt if the tree or something else that lurked in the shadows was watching him and judging his and getting ready to make thier move. As sheek got further into the forest the path became unclear and the sound of crows circling him above the clouds louder. Shrek sense of direction was now lost as they day began to come to a close. He walked around aimlessly fearful of what was lurking. One night after a full day of walking tring to find his way out he heard something. A noise, it was like a man's footstep yet quieter and seemingly shorter. Shrek came out of his sleeping bag and looked around "my child I mean no danger to you or this forest come out I wish to speak with you" shrek said with a quaking voice. The forest lay silent. Shrek looked around again when a quick pounce came from a bush and from it was a small brown haired creature wearing old fashion clothes. He lunged at shrek and held a knife to his neck he laughed spratically. "I have found you" he whispered into shreks ear. Shrek pushed him aside and shouted "why my son must you try to pain me" "I'll make your bones into bread, I'll spead your eyes over toast, I'll make your skin into clothes. You will be the crown of my collection" he shouted laughing still uncontrollablely. "My son you must stop for this will not get you anywhere" shrek said clearly scared. "Why did you wait so long to kill me" "I like to see my victims scream, beg me for mercy promising anything to me just to see one more day" he said. "Now time for my murder wig and out from his pocket he produced a large spiked red wig before he once again lunged at shrek and this time he managed to slice his hand. Shrek screamed in pain as the sharp agony pulsed though his body. But then from his bag shrek pulled out a guitar and threw it rumplestiltskin followed it and seemingly disappeared. Finally shrek got some much needed rest although the thought of been murdered in his sleep stressed him alot. For the next couple of days in the forest shrek walked with little fear although as he got closer to his destination the land grew weirder. The trees grouped closer together and the land uneven shrek missed donkey and pus and he thought of them lots. However, the days now were getting lighter as he was almost out of the forest and into the untamed land of Beeston. That morning after waking up and after his food was becoming scarce shrek exited the forest. The land of Beeston had many abandoned buildings like jungles, road men selling drugs and stabbing people but among the chaos lay an oasis. Kyle Upton and Harry Uptons House. It sat as if a castle the only protection for shrek.
As soon as shrek stepped over the border of Beeston he was met by a road man "Yo whats your name man" said the road man "Shr-" shrek began to say "Yo man shut the fuck up nobody asked bro" the road man interrupted "you fucked me up man. I can't think get out my head man get out my head" the road man ran away holding his head screaming get out my head man. Shrek carried on his journey to the oasis for some time untill the day turned to night so shrek rested in a pub. He walked in and the stench of a sweaty 40yr gaza with a Leeds United shirt on hit him and from the cracks of his armpit and his ass cheeks float green lines of stink who sat drinking a beer. There was also a group of people sat at the far side of the bar playing a gambling game. However, among the various other people one stood out to him although he wasn't quite sure why. The man sat alone not talking away from everyone else. He sat with a tin of beans that he was slowly eating. Shrek thought he could see the man staring at him as if examining him. However, shrek could not get a good idea of the man's face as he wore a hat and he mostly had his head down eating his beans. For a while shrek forgot his worrys in the bar talking with locals sharing story's. He found out the little monster he saw in the forest had been troubling the town for a while and that they hoped that he was now gone for good. But after many hours of conversation shrek decided to get a room and set off in the morning. Shrek awoke with a blur but as his eyes adjusted to his surroundings he above him a dark shadow yet it had a form like a man. The shadow drew its sword before shrek could react and it stabbed him in the heart before shrek awoke in a cold sweat. It was a dream. He sat up in his bed as his eyes adjusted to the darkness but after one or two minutes shrek felt as if a dark figure passed the window of the room. Shreks room was at the top part of the bar it was not a terrible room small but cosy. He looked around desperately and quickly looking for an answer when another shadow passed the window this time shrek got a better look at it. It was large and dark it wore a tattered cloak and had a sword sheaved under it. The same one from the dream. An then suddenly a loud knock came from the door. Shrek cowered in his bed frozen when the door swung open and in came the a man. The man shut the door and blocked it he was panting as if he was running or if he was in grave danger. Now shrek could get a better idea of who the man was he now realised that it was the man from before who was watching him carefully. "What do you want from me shrek cried "I'm here to help you shrek word of your journey has spead and many people are not welcoming of you". "I'm not quite sure who those shadows are but I know they want you dead and they will stop at nothing untill thier task is complete". "What are we to do" said shrek now sat on his bed on high alert. "We must go to Kyle and Harry they may know more on these creatures of the night and in their home we are safe" Whispered the man when another knock came to the door before the started to barge the door. "Come, the door is not verry strong and my defence won't last long" the man opened the window and threw a rope down tieing one end to the bed. They both climbed down the rope and then onto the man's horse. "Thank you" said shrek pausing to say his name "my name is Joe Webster" pleasure to serve you shrek. As they began to ride to the house of Kyle and Harry from the distance they could see the shadows watching them though the window of thier room.
Part 3 as Written By key whiteness of shrek decent to Earth
The expansion of the shrek religion As Written by kristianus kokaes
As the shrek religion began in the UK it quickly spread to Beeston and Bramley though the use of devout peasants moving looking for better paying jobs after the black death (1348-50). However in the 1500s came the discovery of the new world and with that opened new trade routes wear people often spread their faith to Shrek. This act spread the religion to Spain. Many years after this once the shrek religion had been woven within the culture of Spain and most of the country belived in him and built monuments in his name. Some would set out on pilgrimages from Spain to Saudi Arabia spreading thier religion further. However one country failed to see shrek as thier god. Australia. For shrek is just and omnibevelence he came to peace with this fact untill they got his Wendy's order wrong.

Saw a post like this when researching before my run, thought it would be cool to make one to document my own journey.
Age: 25 M
Ht/Wt: 6'3, ~205
Race Information Name: Rock 'n Roll Nashville Marathon Date: April 27, 2024 Distance: 26.2 miles Location: Nashville, TN Website: https://www.runrocknroll.com/nashville
Time: 5:18:24
Goals Goal Description Completed? A Finish the Race Yes
Splits
(From Apple Watch):
Total Distance 26.54 Mile Pace 1 8:36 2 8:45 3 10:19 4 9:43 5 10:42 6 10:49 7 10:07 8 10:30 9 10:07 10 10:51 11 12:06 12 10:57 13 11:37 14 12:15 15 11:51 16 12:32 17 14:26 18 12:36 19 14:16 20 13:46 21 13:53 22 14:52 23 16:32 24 13:39 25 13:32 26 13:35 27 6:27
Avg. Pace 12:02
(Official Race Stats):
Total Distance 26.2
Mile Time Time of Day Pace
Start 00:00:00 7:29:10 am ---
1 00:07:32 7:36:42 am ---
6.2 01:00:07 8:29:17 am 9:59
10 01:41:46 9:10:55 am 11:00
13.1 02:11:00 9:40:09 am 11:12
16 02:54:11 10:23:20 am 12:45
18.5 03:24:32 10:53:42 am 13:48
22.2 04:21:46 11:50:55 am 14:19
Finish 05:18:24 12:47:33 pm 13:29
Avg. Pace 12:04
Training Not much to say here. For a quick backstory, I am 25 and in decent shape. Lift weights when I can and have done versions of cardio, such as jiu jitsu, intermittently in the past. I usually will sign up for a turkey trot or 5k once a year and run it straight off the couch with no training to challenge myself, but I am not a runner. Up until last fall, 4 miles was the most I had ever run at one time, and that was years ago for the Music City 4th of July run, before they switched it to a 5k. October '23 that finally changed though when I ran the Tough Mudder (TM) just outside of Nashville. A friend and I signed up the night before and decided to go all out and do the 15k. It was grueling but we made it through in a decent time, and now 9.3 was officially the farthest I had ever run in my life. It was tough, but being on a cow farm with multiple obstacles, definitely far different from 9.3 on the road.
Fast forward to 14 weeks pre-race. The tough mudder had peaked my interest and I had started following multiple Ultra-runners and marathoners on instagram (though I hadn't run since the TM). Seeing all their videos had the thought of one day running a marathon plaguing my mind. On a random weekday I cracked and mentally committed to running the Rock n' Roll Nashville Marathon. I downloaded Nike Run Club, set up my 14 week training program, and signed up for the race. That was just about the last thing I did to prepare...
As 14 weeks turned to 13 weeks, and 13 to 12, with each day that passed I found myself saying that I'd start my training tomorrow. It wasn't until March that I finally laced up a pair of shoes. My girlfriend also signed up for the Marathon the same week I did, but unlike me is an avid runner, and was sticking to a strict training plan. She would always ask me to run with her and I would always find an excuse not to. Eventually I gave in the first Saturday of March, and agreed to run part of the Marathon course with her (the section through Edgehill and Belmont). It was excruciating. I went just under 6 miles at a snails pace. My legs hurt bad early on, and I had to walk most of the way. I wasn't wearing a tracker, but it was slow. After many days of rest, she finally convinced me to run again on the last day of the month. This time I was wearing a watch. We went 9.89mi and I did it in 2hr14min (she had to run ahead and come back to get me). This is when I knew I had messed up. My body ached, my armpits were chaffed, and I was demoralized. And that was it.. Less than a month until race day and I wouldn't run again. Just under 15 miles in 14 weeks, and now it was time to run 26.2...
Pre-race I live in Nashville, so I didn't need to travel. I was excited the whole week leading up to the race, and honestly, that morning I felt really good. I woke up early, Had some gummy bears for breakfast, and headed to my girlfriends house to drop our puppy with her roommate and head to the race. We got dropped off for the race about 45 minutes early. I tried to eat a goo since all I had was about 12 gummy bears, but had to slowly suck it down because those things are foul. We waited in line for the port-a-potties, and by the time we both got out it was about 15 minutes to race start. We headed to our corrals together but then I lost her as I went to warmup on the side. I tried looking for her before the start but there were too many people together. I was officially on my own.
Race As the corrals started to go, I tried my best to take it all in. There was no turning back. Limited training (and honestly no respect for the distance of the race) but I knew I was going to finish no matter what. Finally my corral made our way to the front. I heard the countdown, then we started to go.
Miles 1-10 The first part of the race was incredible. It was so cool getting to see the city I've lived in for so long from this point of view. I started off quicker than I should of for the first few miles, but my adrenaline was fueled by the support of the crowds lining the streets. All the cheering and the signs made it hard to focus on how much the running sucked. I ran until about about mile 3 or 4 when we hit a water station and I veered off for a second to go pee. When I got back out from the restroom I adopted the 5-1 run/walk method. My only goal was to finish before the time ran out, and I knew if I could just run as much as possible I would make it.
Around mile 6 is when the mental battle really began for me. The hills were long, and I just kept thinking of how far I still had to go, but I stuck strict with my method of run 5 minutes walk 1 (often running longer than 5 to prove a point to myself). Miles 8-10 I got a pretty big boost again, as I stopped quick to pet my dog and then got to fist bump a few people I knew along the way. Running through the Gultch felt like a celebration and gave me a high like no other. An absolutely incredible experience.
Miles 10-17 It was right around mile 10.5 when the split happened. Those running the half-marathon took a hard right, while the rest of us headed straight. This is where things got lonely. As we headed towards the overpass to cross the highway into North Nashville, the runners were spread out and the spectators were few. As I was looking at my watch thinking about how many of those running the half marathon were nearly done, I started to realize what a marathon truly was: exponential length. I tried my best not to think of the distance left, just focusing on making it to 13.1mi. My watch was a little ahead at this point, but after passing the mile 13 sign I started telling myself that the distance I'd run was officially more than what was left, and the number was only going to get smaller.
For being the loneliest part of the run, these miles did have some pretty cool moments like running the trails by the river and running through First Horizon Park. Won't lie, even though I still had a lot of way to go, there were quite a few moments during this stretch where I started to get choked up about what I was accomplishing. Maybe it's silly or egotistical, but coming from a family where no one is a runner (or remotely active for that matter), I was heeling a great sense of pride for what I was doing.
Miles 17-21 Right before mile 17, we merged back with those still running the half marathon. It was also right before mile 17 when my legs tried to give up on me. My feet had been hurting since mile 11, but now, what had been a dull pain on the outside of my knee began to feel like a sharp stab every time I would slow down to walk. It would hurt slightly more for a few seconds once I would start to run, but weirdly would go away once I got my pace. I was still trying my best to stick to the 5-1 method, but damn was it hard.
It was somewhere just before mile 18 when we were crossing a bridge over the river. On the downhill slope of the bridge, my right quad started cramping unbelievably. There was a moment I thought that this might end things for me, but I quickly scrapped that thought and continued jogging to the end of the bridge, where I stretched for a second and was magically healed. the next few miles through eat Nash were hard. I was trying my hardest to run with some sort of meaningful pace, but my legs physically wouldn't keep up with what my mind was trying to do (i guess training would've helped here). I had made it this far though, and I wasn't going to give up now.
Miles 21-24 Mile 21.. Oh boy. This started the long road into Shelby Park: Lord help me. This was without a doubt the most grueling stretch of the race. The sun was out, air was heating up, and being from Nashville, I knew how long this stretch of road was about to be. At this point I wanted to do everything in my power to protect my body. On the way leading up to this stretch I had already seen quite a few people passed out or being carted away, and I did not want to suffer the same fate.
I had been smashing goos throughout the whole race, but they weren't enough to make up for the caloric deficit I was in. I took it slow, running as much as I could without pushing too hard. My girlfriend had called me when i was at mile 20.5 and told me that they had snack stations set up in Shelby park around mile 22. I knew that if I could make it to those then that would give me what I needed to make it to the finish. But getting there wasn't easy. My legs were fried, my heart was starting to hurt (probably from the caffeine goos I had), and it was getting hot. I passed my girlfriend for the first time on my way into the park as she was headed out. Getting to give her a high five gave me a boost to keep moving with pace.
When I made it to the snack station at the entrance of the park, I pounded a handful of Cheez-its and a cookie. I walked most of the way to the next snack station, stopping halfway at a med tent in between to grab some ibuprofen, before I downed another handful of Chex mix and got back to running. These couple miles in the park felt so long, but I made it out. My AirPods died at mile 24 but it didn't matter, I was almost there.
Miles 24-Finish
Mentally, I caught a second wind. Physically, my body still couldn't keep up. Oddly enough, there had yet to be a point where my cardio was holding me back, or I felt I couldn't run because I was out of breath. It was all 100% my body's inability to keep my legs moving at the rate my brain was telling them to. It was like they had a mind of their own. The rest of mile 24 and most of 25 were uphill. I won't lie, I walked a majority of it, but this was the first point where I walked with meaningful pace. I was so close, I just wanted to be there. by the back half of mile 25 I knew for sure that I was going to finish the race. It became less about preserving myself to make it, and more about how fast could I make it.
Once we made the left onto Woodland St, it was on. I tried to run as far as I could, stopping and starting until I made it to the parking lot of Nissan Stadium. At this point my vision narrowed. I jogged to the final turn, and when I saw the arch of the finish line, I bolted. My legs finally turned back on, and all the pain went away. These last few hundred feet were the fasted I ran throughout the entire race. Everything around me went dark and all I saw was that little line of plastic that I had to cross.. I was cooking. When I finally crossed it, the world came back into view. After 5 hours and 18 minutes of mental warfare, I made it.
Post-race Post race was a little weird. After crossing the finish line, all those emotions I was feeling in miles 10-17 were nowhere to be found. Sure, I felt accomplished, but the feelings of joy and gratitude where over powered by hunger, fatigue, and the slow onset of pain. I grabbed some snacks and went to get my medal engraved with my name and race time. While waiting for this, the pain really started to set in. They called my name to collect my medal, and my girlfriend pointed out that the spelled my name wrong. I was so tired that I didn't even care (and still don't). About 20 minutes post-race, it started to settle in a little more what I had just done. Run a marathon with next to no training.
I proved to myself that truly you are capable of anything you put your mind to. The walk across the pedestrian bridge to get picked up sucked, but it was worth it, because the meal after was one of the best I've ever had. Leading up to the race, I had planed to do a lot to celebrate after we finished, but none of those plans came to fruition. I was beat. All I wanted to do was go home and lay on the couch, and so I did.
It wasn't until a few days later that I finally felt the weight of all the emotions for what I had accomplished. I finally understood why people challenge themselves in this way. I truly believe everyone should attempt a marathon at least once in their lifetime (but I'd recommend training lol). It is so much more than just a race. It is a way to grow closer to yourself and stretches far beyond the course. As I'm writing this, my body is still recovering from the beating it took, but I will definitely be back again with a bigger goal in mind. Running was something I used to hate, but now I believe it is something I will continue to do until the day I die.
Thanks for reading. Made with a new race report generator created by u/herumph.

I have not been diagnosed, but my experience seems to be similar to most people here and I am hoping to get another checkup soon. Obviously Reddit isn't really the place for medical advice, but if you have any info to help my anxiety about the situation before I get checked, please send it my way.
It started mostly with a dull ache and pressure above my sternum and below the clavicle, as well as shortness of breath and seemingly restricted breathing and inability to expand my chest when breathing, and when I try really hard to, it is uncomfortable and weirdly tickles/itches and makes me feel the need to clear my throat or cough. Some days I can hardly tell anything is off, but others there is pain in the chest, upper back, left ribs, as well as a bloating sensation near where I would expect my diaphragm to be on the left with mild pain that worsens with pressure. I also occasionally get armpit discomfort and pins and needles down my arm, sometimes all the way down to my hand.
One of the more common symptoms when the symptoms flare up is muscle spasms of the left chest wall between the top left and second to top ribs, I can even feel the muscle spasming with my right hand if I put light pressure in that spot and breathe out deeply in some postural positions. I also occasionally get similar spasms in my diaphragm muscles on both sides under my ribs, but these don't seem to be directly correlated with an exhale. I sometimes get spasms in the muscles on both sides of my neck as well near my corotated artery that feel very similar to the chest spasms, which lead me to thing I was having heart palpitations or something of the sort, but I have managed to feel my pulse while my neck was spasming confirming it wasn't a cardiovascular issue. I also get minor twitches in facial muscles, mainly near my temple, my left eyebrow, and the right side of the bridge of my nose. I also seem to get hiccups and diaphragm contractions that feel like a cross between a prolonged hiccup and a yawn, especially after eating.
I think a good chunk of the issue also comes from neck posture, because one of my favorite video games to play is a mobile game where the controls are tilt, and since it is way easier to tilt my head down than to hold my phone out in front of my face for long periods of time, I end up resorting to that most of the time even though I know it is HORRIBLE posture. I also catch myself stretching my neck out forward while at my computer which definitely doesn't help.
I haven't really found any solutions and I am scared of doing stretches and breathing exercises in fear of doing the wrong ones and making it worse, but I am hoping my visit to the doctor will help. all these symptom are accompanied by muscle tightness in places such as the back of my neck, my core, my traps, and sometimes my lower chest (My upper chest seems very underdeveloped comparatively to the lower if that provides additional insight). I even went to the ER once for these symptoms thinking I was having heart or lung problems and was scared it might be a heart attack, but after a chest scan and vitals they said my lungs and cardiovascular system seemed to be normal, though occasionally my breathing would get so sparse that their monitor started beeping at me, and my breath rate went as low as 6 bpm but averaged 10-12. They said it was likely acid reflux and panic attacks though the symptoms persist even when I am not very anxious if at all. I haven't noticed much improvement if any from taking the antacid (omeprazole) and after reading peoples stories with this and how posture is closely related I am fairly confident this is what I am suffering from. If anybody has tips, tricks, or anything of the sort it'd be much appreciated.
Is there a particular type of specialist I should see for this checkup, or should I just go to my general care physician?

Hi guys, god I was so high on pain medication the last time I wrote to you.. GLAD that’s over. I hated feeling so weird. Well today is officially 14 days since I had my reduction. So an update is due! I was at the doctors 2 times, they cleaned my scars and all that. First time was the 26th of april and second time was 29th of april. I got an allergic reaction to the plasters I had on my breast, both the ones from the clinic and the allergy friendly ones I got here in my city😭..
Well I think I should tell you. First checkup went well, the nurses had no clue what tubular breast was. So I had to educate them😅. Everything looked really good except one spot near my armpit and one right under my areola. The bleeding under my armpit had stopped when I was back monday. The one under my areola is a little bigger. It is still kinda bleeding and stuff but it’s so so so much better now than it was the 26th and the 29th. It’s kinda amazing. But my body is really good at healing scars.
One thing tho that happened on the 29th.. There was a breast specialist visiting my local hospital. She is from the bigger hospital some miles away. She was so weird, she straight up told me that the scar under my areola will be an ugly scar. I started crying so so so much. It honestly hurt having someone say that something on my body will be ugly. (I never thought my tubular breast was ugly, the size difference was always the problem) But her telling me that my scar will be ugly got me so fucked up I started crying and almost hyperventilating. Sorry for my language but what a bitch.. I literally told her “you know, now every time when I look in the mirror I will think of you telling me that my scar is and will be ugly” she than corrected herself and said “It will be a bigger scar” But like for real, I HAVE HAD PLASTIC SURGERY I don’t want to hear that my body is ugly. I don’t ever want to see her again 🥲. Well I tried asking about what size implants she thought would be a good fit for me. She started to go on and on about how breast implants can cause cancer and that she doesn’t think that we should put plastic in our bodies. God lady, good thing it’s my body and my money. Me and Barbie can be plastic together 🤭. I have to let this go but I’m still so angry at her, but mostly sad and hurt over how I was treated.
Besides that, I never told you this so I have to. The 22nd of april I was home with my mother. I was 5 days post op. Long story short, I got a really bad stomach ache and I fainted.. I think I had some kind of panic attack. Luckily I was sitting on the floor with my mom. She had a cold towel that she was putting on my head before that. I sat up we unhooked my super tight bra and I tried to breathe normally. Than I said “I’m about to faint” My mom told me that I fell forwards but she catched my head and put me in her lap, I was gone for like 3-5 seconds or so. Good thing that I went to the toilet before that because when I woke up it felt like I was going to pee😭. But after I fainted everything went back to normal. I wasn’t in any pain after that. So to be honest it was kinda nice fainting because the pain was all gone when I woke up. I have fainted one time before so it was nothing new. I called the clinic to let them know what happened and they where so happy that I was okay and said to call if something like that happens again so that they can make a note in my surgery journal.
other than that my recovery has been good and my family has been a big help. I’m so grateful that they are by my side and helping me until I am 100% recovered. I really want to go back to work and dance class but I have to wait 2 more weeks until I can do that! I will be going to dance class this monday and tuesday but not participating. I’m so excited to finally see my friends!! Love /T❤️❤️❤️

They.did all my vitals, EKG, and blood. All were top notch normal. I have off and on armpit/shouldeouter arm/hand ache and ache in breast or under breast, also sometimes gets to my chin. They aren't sure what would cause this for a week, but know it is not my heart apparently. Goes away when sleeping. Anyone have any idea?

Please bear with me, this has been a very long process- I appreciate any input. Keep in mind that we believe I am dealing with 2 separate issues. I am a 36 year old female. Great health overall, no major issues. I am 5'9 130lbs, was very active before all of this- worked out 3-4 days a week, lots of paddleboarding, hiking, etc.
19 months ago I was rear-ended while sitting at a stoplight. At the time of impact I had my neck cocked back taking a drink of coffee, with my body slightly twisted to the right toward the cupholder. Within about 15 min my neck started tightening up. Some minor neck aches and shoulder aches over the next couple of weeks. Next came mid back pain near my spine around T4-T6, both sides.
I began physical therapy 2 weeks after the accident and continued for 2.5 months, as well as seeing the chiropractor in their office who also did some microneedling. The PT would always comment that my traps felt like rocks, and my range of motion was affected. I actually felt like the chiro was making things worse so i stopped seeing him. The pain in my upper mid back would not go away, so I was referred for massage. The massage therapist would akso do cupping all over my shoulders and back. He would always comment on how tight my scalenes and traps were. That is when things got serious- after each massage I had extreme pain- like would lay on the couch for 2 days debating going to the ER. I would take muscle relaxers and ibuprofen with no relief. Eventually the massage therapist said he felt like he was making things worse and told me I needed to move on to the next step.
At that point my PCP (Who is a DO) finally agreed to do an MRI. He ordered a C Spine MRI- i told him all of my severe pain was in my mid and upper back, shoulders and asked him to please order a T spine MRI- he would not- "your tspine pain is paraspinal so an MRI is not warranted." Cspine MRI came back normal other than mild straightening. Every time I would bring up the pain my doctor would respond with 'this is muscular in nature, continue PT, chiro, acupuncture, traction therapy, massage.'
After that I tried just doing daily light workouts at home (before the accident I was in great shape and had been working out 3-4 days a week, super active). Whenever I tried doing any upper body workouts (back, shoulders, chest) I would pay for it for a few days. I also had a PT friend of mine send me over some different stretches to do at home. At this time I decided I would continue down his list and scheduled traction therapy. I had one visit that caused sharp shooting pain down the left side of my neck and therefore didnt go back. At this point I was having daily severe pain in the base of my neck, left and right shoulder, around my scapulas, and it is starting to wrap around my ribs on both sides- the pain is always worse on the left side. It feels like my back has been lit on fire. A couple of friends highly recommended a chiro that really helped them, so I scheduled an appt with him. He told me my left shoulder was much higher than my right shoulder, likely due to the position i was in at impact- he recommended a consult with an upper cervical specialist and said he would not adjust me at all until I got imaging of my TSpine. He ordered an Xray that showed mild facet changes T10-T12, likely degenerative. Considered normal. I called the upper cervical specialist he recommended but they charge an up front fee of $4500 to be treated. Yeah, not happening.
Next was acupuncture. After 10 visits I had little to no results. Each visit she would ask me if i felt better and I would cry and say no. Even her little scans she did beforehand did not improve after 10 visits. I had a roadtrip planned and wasnt sure I could physically do it- she sent me with one of their high end TENS units to take on the trip with me. I would place it at T1 and the base of my lower back. It helped quite a bit and made it so I could actually tolerate sitting in the car. I literally wore the thing for 7 days straight other than when showering or swimming. It definitely took the edge off. After this I searched around and found a different upper cervical specialist that charged like a normal office per visit. She did her specialty xrays and determined that my cspine 'was like the leaning tower of Piza'- it was leaning to the right almost 7 degrees, which according to her is just unheard of. She said normally the worst people she sees are at about 3 degrees and that the only possible way it can be nearly 7 degrees is with trauma. Likely the muscles and ligament on the left were extremely stretched on the left and can't hold my head straight anymore. Her treatments are sort of voodoo-ish however I can say that there is something to it. She does scans each visit that show the temp changes in your muscles on each side of your neck. Most times I dont tell her my pain level until after she does the scans- when my pain is worse the scans look terrible, when my pain is less the scans look much better. By this time I am realizing the more I move my neck, especially side to side, the more pain I get at the base of my neck and top of my shoulders, as well as my upper back. The more I move my back, ie bending, twisting, lifting, pushing, pulling the more pain I get mid back and wrapping around my ribs and now into my chest/abs. At this point I have now been in daily severe pain for 10 months with very little relief, only when i use a tens unit or dont move much. Some days i would lay in bed all day just to avoid moving and being in pain. I quit taking out the trash because it would cause me more pain. I quit going grocery shopping because pushing a cart caused me more pain. I started driving as little as possible because turning my back and body to watch traffic and put my seatbelt on caused the most pain. I could only do basic cleaning because reaching and scrubbing and vacuuming caused more pain. Folding laundry caused more pain, bending and twisting to put clothes away. Even bending to take the clothes out of the washer to put into the dryer causes more pain. I literally feel like i am disabled. I stopped doing everything and my husband picked up the slack- he even cooks most nights now because it is too much bending, twisting, standing in one spot so when i do cook i pay for it the rest of the night.
At this point the pain around my ribs is getting more and more severe and it becomes painful to even breathe. The upper cervical specialist recommended I see my pcp about possible costochondritis. I scheduled with a new doctor since my DO was too conservative and wasnt taking me seriously. I told the new doc everything and asked him about costo- he said you absolutely do not have costo- and he ordered a followup c spine mri and finally a tspine mri, as well as referred me to pain management. The cspine mri showed the same straightening of the lordosis due to muscle spasm. The tspine mri showed 'minimal disc bulge T7/T8 without significant canal or foraminal stenosis, mild thoracic dextroscoliosis, no ligamentous injury, no stenosis throughout thoracic spine.' I went to my first pain management appt- he said my mri's look great, i think this is muscular-try PT again. He said he knew an amazing PT and he was positive she would be able to help me. He gave me a different muscle relaxer to try. My first PT appt she did all kinds of motion tests to see what movements made pain worse. She was essentially doing all of the things I had been desperately trying to avoid the last few months. The next day I thought I was going to die. My entire back, shoulders, chest, neck, armpits everything was on fire. My left forearm and pinky and ring finger were numb and tingling, My face was tingling, my ribs felt like they were on fire and being pulled apart at the same time, my ears were ringing, it hurt to breathe. At my next visit with her i explained everything and she said my nerves were shot and started focusing on nerve glides. When she would move my left leg up and down I would get more sharp pain around my left scapula- she said 'you dont have a muscle that goes from your leg to your scapula- this is obviously nerve related'. I couldnt tolerate upper body nerve glides at all. She also tried a tens unit but rather than putting on my tspine like i normally do she put it all around my left scapula- she put the pads on my skin and I said ok that's high enough--- she hadn't even turned it on yet! My back was to her so i couldnt see when she was turning it on but i knew the second she did- i screamed and pulled the pads off as fast as i could. She said i clearly had nerve issues going on and that i needed to go back to pain management to see if they could some sort of injections to calm things down because she didnt think she'd be able to get any progress without it. She believes I have thoracic outlet syndrome caused by damage to my scalenes (my pec also now has a big knot on it) and she also believes my minor bulging disc is causing symptoms. 6 weeks later was my next pain management (he always does 6 weeks between appts)- i told him everything. I told him about how she would lift my leg up and i would get sharp pain at the bottom of my scapula- he said oh yeah, that's because the muscles are so tight.' I said she really thinks i need to get an injection at c7/T1 because that's where the nerve is that causes the pinky/ring finger numbess, and she feels like that area is stuck, it has no movement. When I said she also believes my little disc bulge is causing symptoms he totally blew me off- he said 'highly unlikely' and just moved on. He did say lets order an EMG on your arms, "but i dont think it's going to show anything. He said injections are not necessary- and gave me a stronger muscle relaxer (my 5th one) and meloxicam. I broke down at this point and said I don't know what else to do, I cant deal with being in pain anymore. I have gone to all kinds of appts multiple times a week for 18 months, I've never missed an appt, I cant do anything I enjoy, I am afraid to move wrong, I have no life- my life revolves around appts and desperately trying to relieve my pain. He said why don't we try cymbalta, it helps with diabetic nerve pain (i thought I didn't have nerve pain 🙄) and he wants me to get a second opinion from another dr in his practice. Around this time I am noticing that every day my feet are falling asleep and sometimes my whole left leg falls asleep. It is always when I am sitting down. Sometimes they wake up quickly when I stand up, sometimes my leg is asleep for entire days. The PT that the pain management dr so highly regarded is extremely frustrated that he is not listening to her- she sent very detailed notes in and at the appts I asked him if he had read them and he said no. Then he skimmed through the things she has been working on- he said 'nerve glides, stretching, etc, etc- this is great! You guys are doing great! Keep doing what you're doing!' He failed to continue reading to the part that said THESE THINGS ARE NOT HELPING AND ARE MAKING SYMPTOMS WORSE!' And he never even read her recommendations. I should also mention that not once did this guy ever touch me, examine me, ask me questions, nothing. He read the mri reports which 'looked great' and immediately determined my issue was muscular. I scheduled the appt with his partner for a second opinion. He was better- he did all kinds of reflex tests, i told him exactly where the pain radiates around my rib cage to my chest in the middle of my back and told him the physical therapist is adament that my minor disc bulge is causing symptoms because it is in the exact same area- he just said 'that is highly unlikely'. He did seem to listen about the thoracic outlet syndrome but never actually acknowledged it. My left leg and foot reflexes were hyperactive so he recommended that we add my left leg to the emg test. He told me "you know moving more isn't going to cause any issues"- i said i physically cant- i can assure you I have tried over and over and over. He said well you're not going to make things worse or injure yourself, ypu need to move more and make sure you're active. I saod I physically CAN'T! I said you're not understanding- i'm not dealing with some minor muscle aches when I do too much, my back literally feels like it is on fire and i cant move! Every day! I CAN'T be more active. He kept commenting on how good everything looked how great my range of motion is even in my shoulders! That I just need to be more active. At this point I was sobbing. He said well your numbness is probably coming from your elbow so lets do the emg and see what's going on. My husband said so would that because causing the pain in her back, because the pain IS IN HER BACK! he said sure, it will be able to check the nerves coming from her neck too, so we'll see.
Ugh. EMG scheduled May 9. I am feeling hopeless. I strongly believe that my bulging disc is causing severe symptoms with certain movements. I also believe I have thoracic outlet on top of it, but I think that treating the bulging disc would allow my muscles to stop spasming so that my shoulders and neck can relax and then we can try Graston on my shoulders and neck to try to break up scar tissue. I am hesitant to even get the EMG with the pain mamagement doc because i dont feel like he is listening to me and I'm afraid he'll correlate my results with whatever muscular issue he is thinking is going on. I am done with him. I feel like I need someone a little younger and less set in their ways, and who will also look at symptoms rather than just mri results.
Anyway- to sum things up-
What we believe is happening: thoracic outlet syndrome + symptomatic minor bulging disc T7/T8.
Symptoms: Upper back pain Mid back pain Rib pain/burning that wraps around sides to chest- i can literally follow the rib around Ab pain sometimes when it is the worst Burning and pain at side of scapula near spine Deep ache at spine mid back on both sides Tight pec that exacerbates pain when i press it Tight scalene on left that exacerbates pain when i press it (which is why I think the massage cause extreme pain) Numbness and tingling both feet Numbness and tingling left leg Sciatica symptoms a couple of times in left leg- knot in butt cheek and shooting pain down leg Muscles pulling at base of skull Traps always spasmed and aching at shoulders and back of neck
Things that help: Tens unit on tspine Diclofenac on scalenes, pec, and under armpit Lidocaine patches Prednisone helped some but as soon as I started tapering down the pain came back.
Things that make pain worse: Bending Lifting Twisting (especially) Lifting my left arm Reaching Turning my neck side to side Bending my neck backward Driving (especially) Sitting down Pushing Pulling Cleaning Upper body massage Basically any exertion I recently tried to do a dead hang because I read that it can relieve some of the pressure on the disc. My left arm gave out.
At this point I hope the EMG shows something, anything to work with. I keep reading that it only shows something if you have severe nerve damage and so it is often inconclusive.
I am open to any suggestions and input- i am willing to try anything. I can't live like this 😔

I took my first injection of mounjaro yesterday afternoon, and about 8 hours later I had extreme body aching and skin soreness to the touch. My skin had felt almost sunburnt or sore like when getting the flu. To remove my clothes was extremely painful and even laying in bed hurt. I looked up the side effects and this was not one of them. This morning I woke up even worse, so I decided to look into it more. I chose to go on TikTok and Reddit and saw that some others do in fact experience this and they say it can be a few things such as allodynia which is skin pain/sensations when things are coming into contact with my skin (even a brush of a feather for example) or that is could be an immune response to the medication.
After looking more into why I might be one of the few to experience the allodynia or immune response it seems only certain people usually with immune disorders or underlying health issues have experiences similar things. Does anyone have more info on why that might be?
My pain is all over but mainly armpits, chest, back of neck and down back

This is officially part 1 of the Exchange Program Shenanigans final arc.
Yeah, we have maybe two or three more chapters until this whole thing is over. I really don't know what I'm going to do after that. Trust me, though, the finale is gonna go crazy. I've been in the kitchen, now you just gotta let me cook.
CW: crazy banger action sequence, drug use, not quite a die hard, evil jelim😈
Memory Transcription Subject: Jackson Kern, UN-Venlil Interspecies Liaison
Date (standardized human time): September 21, 2136
Now, I wouldn't go so far as to say I was a vengeful man. On the contrary, I could be really forgiving if someone actually did deserve it. Hell, I even forgave a few people who didn't deserve it. Or maybe they did. I wasn't exactly an expert on the philosophical quandaries regarding morality and the meaning thereof. Neither was I an expert on 'The Philosophical Quandaries Regarding Morality and the Meaning Thereof', which was a textbook I had to read in English class.
Anyway, back to the point.
I was not a vengeful man. I would never throw a fist out of anger, I would never fire a shot in rage, hell, the worst beatings I gave when I got mad were to my punching bag back home. Don't get me wrong, I could still cause a lot of damage, but I just didn't see the reason to. My left hook was pretty nasty, yeah, but it wouldn't do shit against a tax form or a burnt waffle or a failed PR on bench.
What it did work on, however, were shitheads. Especially shitheads of the armed variety, and especially especially shitheads of the small and flimsy variety. Like Karelim, for that matter.
Well, he would probably shoot me if I decked him. And Vrapic would definitely shoot me. And I don't think I'd ever love Jelim if she wouldn't at least draw her gun. So that's a hard pass.
Okay, maybe it wouldn't work on that one particular shithead. That was fine, because there was absolutely no particular lack of shitheads around that it would work on. Like terrorists, for example. I was goddamn surrounded by terrorists.
Behind me, or below me if we wanted to get technical, the Extermination Guild had gathered up every shithead it could find to storm the Federation Tower like they were doing a raid on Bin Laden. In front of me, or above me if we still wanted to be technical, the Predator Guard had also gathered up every shithead it could find to all get fucking massacred by me and my shithead buddies.
So, really, I was surrounded by shitheads. My nasty left hook was going to get a lot of work in today.
Oh, shit, barricade up ahead.
I turned a corner into what looked like an office-type place, and people started shooting at me. Not very accurately, thank god, but they were still shooting at me and that made them shitheads. And, while my left hook did work really well against shitheads, there was one thing in my hands that somehow worked even better.
A shotgun.
I barreled through the hail of gunfire, coming from a few Venlil grunts hiding behind some sort of makeshift barricade, and opened up with my automatic shotgun. It was loaded with armor-piercing slugs, powerful enough to punch through most materials, and it ripped straight through any cover these Venlil had.
All in all, I think I cleared that room in five seconds. Nobody was even left by the time I got to bash through the barricade with sheer Jack Kern muscle power, which was a real shame. It would've been nice to have got that on video.
One of them did shoot me, by the way. They weren't all losers. But, thankfully, I was wearing Class III armor plate and so his shitty .22 felt like being punched in the chest instead of dying of a bullet wound. It still hurt, but I've had worse. Being shot was definitely worse.
So, technically, they've had worse too. I looked around, kicking a few of the bodies. Yep, they're dead. Sucks to suck. Maybe, next time, they could try not being terrorists? Then I looked up, staring into the metallic eye of a security camera. Damn. I got that shit on video.
They were probably watching me through it. Good. That was good. Now, I wasn't a vengeful man, but I had seen what they did to Jelim. I had seen what they did to a lot of other people, and I was pissed about that too, but they didn't matter. Not like her.
I was not a vengeful man, nor was I one of those 'touch her and die' edgelords who were all probably 125 pounds soaking wet, but these people had put someone I loved in the goddamn hospital.
Heval was going to die today. The second I got my hands on him, he was going to die, and I needed him to know it. I looked dead in the eyes of the shithead behind the security screen. I roared. Pure killer rage, fueled by my anger at the lives they had ruined. "Bring me Heval!"
Nothing. I didn't even know if that camera picked up audio. I raised my shotgun and blew it into scrap metal.
Then I started running again. Heval might not have even been in the building, but his minions were. And the more of them I cleared out, the less were left to fight the exterminators who were coming up behind me.
Not that I liked the exterminators, of course, but I figured it was just common courtesy to kill terrorists for them.
Killing evil people will never not be good. It's a corollary of the 'Always Punch Nazis' principle.
I cleared another corner, no guards this time, and I found an elevator. Yeah, no. No way I'm taking that. It was probably a death trap. Besides, taking the stairs will get me some good cardio for the day.
I had already cleared through most of the barricades on this level, anyway. I took a detour to the nearest stairwell and started climbing. Okay, Jack, let's do this. I looked at the wall. Floor seventeen out of 205. Damn. I'm getting in a lot of cardio today, aren't I?
Well, better get to it. These stairs won't climb themselves.
I was on floor sixty-one when I noticed something very peculiar rolling down the stairs in front of me.
Oh, shit.
That's a grenade.
I picked it up and threw it at the wall, like a dumbass. I jumped backwards and down ten steps of stairs, like a dumbass. I landed on my ass, which hurt like hell, like even more of a dumbass.
But I was alive, so I clearly wasn't that much of a dumbass. The grenade exploded, which was loud as fuck, but it didn't explode anywhere near me. That was the important part.
I got up, shook off the dust from the explosion, and pointed my shotgun upward. "Missed me!"
About five floors up, a Venlil head peeked out over the railing. Dumbass. You took the bait. I shot him. Or her, really. I could never tell with these people.
Somebody started screaming. That was a typical reaction to being shot, and an even more typical reaction to having your friend get shot. I started climbing. I had shitheads to kill.
"Oh, I'm coming for your ass! Just you wait!" Somebody else peeked over the railing, this time with a gun, and I shot him too. Damn. You'd think they learned their lesson after the first guy, but no. These people should not be allowed to breed.
Two more terrorists popped out, also with guns, and I decided that these people were subscribers to the 'If all you have is a hammer...' school of problem solving. I, thankfully, did not have a hammer. I had a shotgun.
They opened fire, hitting me in the chest and head and all the other areas where I had put on body armor, which was good because I had on body armor there. I also opened fire, and they also had body armor, but I had a shotgun. Shotguns and body armor did not mix.
I held down the trigger, spray-and-praying into the armed gunmen three or so floors above me. It looked like I got them, which was fine by me, so I resumed my Sisyphean task of climbing up the Federation Tower stairs.
I was about one floor below them when they started shooting me again. Assholes. Or, more specifically, just asshole singular. The other guy was dead. This one asshole was smart, and I had to give him credit for it, but smarts didn't do him any good against my body armor.
He put two rounds into my chest plate, which tanked the beating like a champ, but it still hurt like a bitch and I still got knocked down from it. I shot back, of course, but it still hurt like a bitch to get shot. It was even worse for the other guy, on account of him having crappy body armor.
Well, that's the end of that.
I started hustling up the stairs again, dodging grenades and fighting terrorists along the way. Yes, I could have swept the entire building and softened up the resistance that way, but it was a really big building and I really didn't have the time for all that.
I got to around the two hundredth floor when I finally figured 'yeah, fuck it'. This was where the security control complex was, after all, and I thought I could do some real good if I cut off the head of the snake.
Three... two... one... boo-yah!
I kicked in the door, firing off a burst from my shotgun as I stepped to the side and collapsed. I was looking at a corridor, and that corridor was filled to the brim with armed terrorists. A full ten dudes with automatic weapons started shooting at me, making the doorway a very not good place to stand in. That was why I had stepped to the side.
Even still, I wasn't perfect, and they shot me way too many times. Even if my body armor did make me a walking tank, that shit still hurt!
I got domed once, rattling around my brain and leaving a dent in my helmet. That was not good. I got hit in the chest three times, and I think I broke a rib from that last bullet. That was also not good, but I could just tough that shit out for now.
Broken bones never stopped me before, well, except for all those times when they did.
One bullet hit me in the leg, nothing vital there, but that was also not good because it hurt like a bitch. And, to add injury to more injury, somebody else had shot me straight in the family jewels. That really hurt like a bitch.
Yep. Jelim is not gonna like that one.
I didn't like it either. Believe it or not, I was down for the count and I probably wasn’t getting back up for a while now. Oh, fuck it. I reached in my utility belt. May as well. I pulled out a hypodermic injector, wiggled it underneath the Kevlar fabric protecting my neck, and pressed hard on the injection button. Oh, yeah, that's the shit.
Stimulant drugs coursed through my veins. The pain in my rib faded to a dull ache. The dull aches everywhere else disappeared. My aim got sharper, my eyes got better, and my reaction time got faster, all at the cost of a very increased risk of cancer. It was why I never really used the things. Still, cancer or not, this is still the shit! God damn, it's effective!
I poked my shotgun around the corner and started firing blind until the shooting at the other end stopped. Then I reloaded, and I fired a few more blind shots just in case. I really didn't want to get shot where the sun don't shine again.
Finally, I peeked around the corner. There were still a few guys left hiding near the back of the corridor, behind crates or walls or other things of that nature, but everybody else had officially been taken off the census list. They probably had families, and those families would probably miss them, but that was hardly my problem.
You see, when you become a psychopath terrorist murderer who works for a corrupt judge and his crazy assassin, dying on the job is kind of the risk you have to take. Not my problem.
I waited for the Venlil at the back to peek out of cover, and then I started shooting. It wasn't really that hard, more like an execution than a gunfight, but they 100% deserved it so who was I to complain? They were all in body armor too. Where in the hell are they getting this stuff? Venlil don't make this shit.
That was a problem, but it could be solved later. Right now, I had to deal with the now problems. Like, for example, the terrorists. I checked all the dead bodies, which were, in fact, dead bodies, and then I got on my merry way to the security center.
Now, this building was big. And I mean big. Like, really big. It was so big that, if I was an immature sixth grader, I would probably have compared it to one of the places I got shot in earlier. But I wasn't, so I didn't.
Because this place was so damn big, I quickly realized that I had no idea where I was. The terrorists had taken down all the signs. It took me way too much time spent combing the facility to realize that I had no idea where I was even going.
Oh. Shit. I'm lost. Now, where the hell is my map?
I was standing in a large room that might've been an executive dining hall or something of that nature, except now it was filled with the dead bodies of at least five well-armed terrorists. Wait, no, six. I forgot about the sniper. Really, they got exactly what was coming to them. Who brings a sniper to an indoors gunfight?
I was surrounded on three sides by walls with doors, the far one being an elevator, and above me there was a skylight that wrapped around the fourth side to create a massive wall-roof window. This was definitely where all the Venlil fat cats ate.
I heard a ding, and I saw movement at the top of the elevator doors. Somebody was going up. Exterminators? Backup would be nice.
They were going up from the 145th floor. Definitely not exterminators. Terrorists, then. I can handle more terrorists. I loaded up my shotgun and got into cover behind one of the wrecked barricades. Their guns were weaker than mine, so I figured it would hold.
150... 160... 170... I leveled my gun at the elevator door, the window directly behind me, and I cast sideways glances at the two regular doors. 180...190... Both of the doors got kicked down all at once in what I assumed was a variation on a three-pronged ambush. It was smart, I'd give them that, but I saw it coming so it clearly wasn't a very good ambush.
Plus, the elevator still had a few seconds to travel. Great plan, sloppy execution. I took aim and started firing.
There were around a dozen terrorists, maybe eighteen, swarming into the room like their guns could actually scratch my armor plate. I opened up with my shotgun, drowning out the light pops of their automatic fire with the deep, heavy, powerful thuds of shotgun slugs. The recoil kicked like a mule, but I could handle it. I always handled it.
There were sixteen terrorists, by my count. By the time the elevator doors opened, there were only thirteen. Then six huge fucking Gojids stepped out, clad in heavy riot gear and toting badass machine guns, and I knew I was in for the shit.
A big gun doesn't make a big man, Jack. You know that.
Well, yeah, but it does shoot a big man really well. Hell, they're about to prove my point!
Twelve terrorists now, besides the Gojids. I fired twice into the wall of muscle and ceramics in front of me, dropping two, but the other four showed me four of their very good friends who all made very persuasive arguments as to why I should hide behind cover. So, naturally, I did. It's hard not to do that when you're getting shot at with machine guns.
I kept firing, sweeping my automatic in a wide arc as I stumbled toward a more defensible position behind a thick table. I leapt over it, catching a bullet in the ass cheek in the process, but I had armor there too so I was fine.
Well, fine in the shooty sense. God damn that stings!
After that, I got into a good shooting stance and started firing. There were only around fifteen terrorists left in total now, four with the heavy guns, so I focused on those. Unfortunately, they had really good cover and they also had really good body armor, so I couldn't actually drop any of them.
So, naturally, I started shooting the mooks. I started with the closest ones to me, because they had a better firing angle and they were easiest to hit, and I worked my way back from there. My shotgun barrel was actually heating up from how much shooting I was doing, but it worked. By the time the gun clicked empty, I had only ten terrorists left to kill.
God, man, sometimes you wonder why they keep trying. I mean, I've already killed, like, half of their friends, so why don't they just give up at some point? Do they really think Shitty Venlil Goon #127 is going to fare any better than Shitty Venlil Goon #126?
Apparently, they did. I ducked behind the table, threw away my empty magazine, and reached for another drum to reload with. Except I had a problem. I was out of drum magazines. Shit!
I still had my pistol, a loaded .45, but that only had six shots to it and there were ten dudes I had to shoot. Well, damn. I guess I'd better make them count.
I took out another hypodermic injector. My last combat stim. Oh, fuck it. Cancer when you're fifty is better than bullet holes right now. I injected that shit like a junkie behind a 7-11 dumpster, I drew my .45 revolver out, and I got to fucking work.
One guy was out of cover. POP! They would need a closed casket for this one. Another wasn't hidden enough to be safe, and I shot him too. Two down. Four more shots, eight more guys.
All of the other guys were now in cover, and not shooting at me, so I seized the opportunity. My .45 could probably pierce the big dudes' body armor, so I'd have to save my last four rounds for them. But there were four other dudes left, and I couldn't waste ammo on those, so I needed a different plan.
I jumped over the table I had been using as cover, dove for the nearest dead guy, and grabbed his gun. I scrambled to my feet, launching myself at where I thought someone was hiding with the strength only a man on combat drugs could have, and tackled the shithead to the ground as he got up.
I rolled, grabbing his gun and ripping it away from his body. I wrenched him up by his throat, using his body as a human shield as I executed his nearest friend. After that, I snapped his neck with both hands and threw his body at the next guy. God damn these combat drugs are strong! This can not be healthy to use.
The body fell short, but it didn't matter since I had a gun. I shot that motherfucker, and I put a burst into the armored Gojids while I was at it, too. The last regular goon tried to shoot me, but I was faster. A lot faster. I put two straight in his head.
Only the big ones left. Showtime! I tossed my stolen automatic aside, drawing my .45 out of its hip holster for the second and hopefully last time.
The Gojid juggernaut people had finally shaken off the effects of my rifle burst by now, which was bad, but it was really just bad for them if you think about it. I raised my .45, barely even aiming, and put a round through the first one's head.
I was halfway from the window to the elevator by now, and the three remaining Gojids were actually pretty close to me. I shot the furthest one, hurdled my old piece of cover to change to a new piece of cover, and lined up a shot on another. I was a good shot, or at least not a bad one, but I still missed that one. Damn!
It wasn't my fault, not technically at least, because I had gotten domed in the head just as I was shooting. The stims let me shrug off most of it, I was a tough motherfucker after all, but it still fucked with my aim a bit.
Oh, fuck it. I've still got one bullet left.
I turned, fired, and dropped the guy who had shot me earlier. Now, there was just one left.
I moved fast, very fast, so fast that anyone not on combat drugs would've struggled to keep up. The last gunner grazed my armor a bit, but I slid under his firing arc and grabbed a rifle off the ground. Six shots into center mass sent him sprawling backwards onto the ground. I drew out my combat knife, lunged at him, and tackled him as he was getting up.
I pinned his gun down with sheer body weight and stabbed at his jugular vein. He grabbed my knife arm with both hands, stopping it just inches from his throat, so I elbowed him in the face. One... two... three... I kept going, not even counting after enough strikes, all to loosen his hold on my knife.
Finally, something cracked. He punched me straight in my armored face, and I twisted my knife to jab it straight through his other wrist. He roared in pain, and I do mean roared, but it was too late. I stabbed out his throat and left his body on the hardwood floor.
Okay, priorities. Step one is to find a good gun. That wasn't too hard. I was surrounded by them, after all. I looked around, spying a really badass machine gun I could borrow, when the sky collapsed on my fucking head.
Well, okay, maybe that was a bit of an exaggeration. The sky was still there. But the skylight was not, and chunks of broken glass rained down onto my head.
How the fuck did the glass break? Isn't it supposed to be reinforced?
It was supposed to be reinforced. They had probably used explosives on it, or something of that nature, because that glass could tank bullets.
I dropped to a crouch and looked up, catching movement. A blur. Dark blue and black. It dove, fast, like a falcon back on Earth, and hit me square in the chest.
I went down. Swung my knife and missed. Talons closed on my wrist, cut my finger tendons, and the knife dropped from my limp hand. I tried grabbing at their legs with my other hand, as they'd gotten on top of me by now, but one of the legs kicked my arm away and pinned it down under their body weight.
Talons closed on my throat. Not deep enough to kill, but they still drew blood. A small flick of the leg, and I would see the white light within thirty seconds. "Don't struggle." Oh. Huh. That is a woman. I struggled. There was only one woman who I'd let pin me down, and this clearly wasn't her.
She kicked me hard in the windpipe. Oh. Yeah. Talons. Jugular-cutting talons. Completely forgot. "What the hell do you want?" I gasped, no longer struggling. Hell, it was a miracle I was still able to speak.
"You're an impressive hunter," she said. Weird compliment, but I'll take it. Still beating your ass, though. "I'd like to have a face I can admire." Her claw lifted from my throat and moved up to my chin, lifting up my helmet. Big mistake.
I elbowed her in the leg, knocking it away from my throat, and rolled to my left while pulling my left arm under me and to the right. That was the one she had grabbed, by the way. She let go just in time, jumping back, and I was on my feet in half a second. I took off my helmet. "There's your face, shitbird."
"Thank you," she trilled. "It'll look just divine when I sever it from your body." Well, excuse me, Jeffrey Dahmer. Yeah, this woman had some serious issues. Normally, I wouldn't judge someone for their mental problems, but this someone was also trying to kill me so I'd say she was very much judgeable.
She leapt high, flapping her wings for a little boost and aiming a kick at my head. I raised an arm to block it, but she grabbed my arm and jabbed me in the stomach with the other leg. It didn't hurt, not a lot, but it sure as hell pissed me off.
I grabbed her leg with my good arm, wrenched it free from my bad one, and threw her to the ground. She got up quick and swung on me, but I dodged it pretty well. She started advancing on me, throwing jabs and kicks at places I really wouldn't want to get stabbed in, so I really had no choice but to back up and block.
Oh, shit. Gun at her feet.
She looked down, jabbed, and reached for a gun that was on the floor. I had to act fast. I caught the jab, twisted sideways, and pulled it across my body to pin the arm. Then I put my foot behind her legs and chopped her windpipe to trip her backwards and stun her for a bit. It worked, but as soon as she fell, she had reached behind her for one of the terrorists' guns.
Oh, shit! Gun in her hand!
I dropped to her level, pinning her right wing down with my knee, but she just swapped the gun to her left and brought it up. I blocked with my bad arm, the one whose hand didn't work, and I saw a flash of metal on the ground. That's my combat knife. I reached for it, going across her body, and as soon as I had grabbed the knife, she had kicked me in the head.
One, two, three nasty blows in quick succession left me reeling. It felt like being shot. I brought the knife down hard on one of her legs, then her chest, but I was really not feeling too good after all the beatings I had been through today.
While I was busy with the knife and distracted from my head rattling, the gun had slipped under my forearm and stuck into my chest. I pushed it away, rolling my arm to trap the barrel under my armpit, but I wasn't fast enough to avoid getting shot.
"You piece of shit!" I stabbed her in the wing with my knife. Then again. And again. All the way to the hilt, until she stopped struggling and I could wrench the gun away from her claws. Then I cut up her other wing, too, just in case she got any bright ideas. She'd probably never fly again.
She doesn't deserve the skies.
I put my knife to her throat, pinning her down as I did that. "Who are you?"
"Well, isn't this fun?" she trilled. "Oh, I just know you're enjoying this. Helpless prey, entirely at your mercy..." She was probably enjoying this more than I was, given the way she talked.
"Where's Sevros?" I barked. "Where's Heval?"
"Oh, I wouldn't know," came that shitty sing-song voice. "I'm just Tiela. Nobody important, really." Yeah, I'm sending this woman straight to a mental institution. A good one, too, not one of those brutal Fed facilities.
"Yeah, fuck you too." I got up, hauled her to her feet, and clicked a pair of handcuffs onto her shredded, bloody wings. I grabbed a gun, shoved her forward with it, and started trudging toward the elevator. And I do mean trudging. I had been through way too much shit today.
Oh, shit, someone's going up. Exterminators? I probably wasn't that lucky. I leveled my gun at the door, using Tiela as a human shield. Well, Krakotl shield technically, but whatever. Same difference.
The door opened. Men in silver suits stepped out, flamethrowers raised at my head. "Five seconds! Drop it!" Man, you know the world is fucked when I'm actually glad to see an exterminator. Holy shit, I'm sore.
I dropped my gun and stepped backwards, hands spread wide, as the exterminators entered and cleared the room. "It did all this?" asked one.
"It's dangerous. Deadly. We've got to keep it on a tight leash." The one in front, who I assumed was in charge, took a stun baton from his utility belt.
"Excuse me?" I snapped, maybe a bit too rashly given the circumstances. "I'm not some kind of psycho murderer who you have to-"
He jabbed me with the stun baton. Electricity coursed through my body. Just a few hours ago, I'd have been able to tank that shock and a dozen more like it, but I was out of juice. Way out of juice, as I only now realized.
I dropped to the ground, twitching and fighting unconsciousness. Obviously, I failed. There was just no fight left in me to give.
First Previous Next

In need of opinions for a relatives sickness Started out as Pluerisy they thought at the emergency room from X-rays. Ibuprofen taken for a couple days then back pain kicked real bad. Spent a week off work on the couch. Week or so later they ran another test at the emergency room and said it was Pnemonia which she have had for a whole month now. Back spasms continuing and shortness of breath. Eventually wound up going to the hospital and they admitted her for 2 days. Ran all sorts of tests. Normal levels for almost all. X ray showed a lump in the esophagus and they did an endoscopy. It was clear. Turned out to be enlarged lympnode. Also had enlarged ones in neck and under armpit. Discharged and met with a hematologist the next week. Could feel the lymphnodes under arms and one side of neck. Ordered a biopsy of one under the arm. Just stuck a needle in this time. Came back clear. Month came and went and she still was short of breath and back continued to hurt. He suggested seeing a rheumatologist but first removing one of the lymph nodes to make sure it’s not cancer. This was confirmed no cancer after a lymphnode biopsy and one more blood test confirmed the sed rate was normal. Met with rheumatologist that put her on hydroxycloriquine or plaqueno in case of lupus because of a double dna test. Been on that for 3 months and made little improvement. Back spasms are still ongoing and going to PT 2 times a week. A couple weeks into the medicine she got shingles which probably is because the immune system was affected by the medicine. She’s 30 and this has all happened since late August 2023. Back spasms continue. Can’t take real deep breaths at all. Joints will ache and when her hands are cold the fingers turn white and sometimes purple. She has a 2 year old and teaches 1st grade and she can barely be a mom and a teacher. She doesn’t know what to do. Sorry for the book

During the existence of Unit 731, the Japanese doctors performed experiments on thousands of people and may have ultimately killed up to 300,000 or 400,000 in the surrounding areas and in their labs. They dissected many alive, including infants and pregnant women, and also injected them with biological weapons agents or other pathogens.
My mother had been one of the rare survivors, a witness to the horrors of those events. She had lived in a town about fifty miles from Manchukuo, the base for Unit 731. She remembered the date when the soldiers and doctors entered her life and took away everything she knew and loved: September 1st, 1942. This was the account of those hellish events she told me before she died.
***
The ceramic bomb fell slowly from the sky, spinning in lazy circles before righting itself and coming straight down towards our town.
A single white plane with the symbol of the rising sun whined past the center of town, flying away like a criminal running away from the scene of a crime. A couple merchants came out of their shops, looking up into the sky with suspicion and fear.
I saw the bomb hit the yard behind my neighbor’s home. It shattered into millions of pieces, a sound like smashing glass shattering the silence.
I was very small at the time, only five or six-years-old. I ran inside to tell my mother. I saw her standing behind the fireplace, cooking a small batch of tea, waiting for my father to come home.
“Mother, a Japanese plane just flew over the town, and it dropped a bomb! But it looked like it was ceramic, and it didn’t even blow up. Why do you think they did this?” My mother’s face paled visibly.
“Stay inside,” she ordered me, turning to look out the window, her eyes filled with fear and anxiety as she continuously looked for my father’s silhouette on the trail leading up to the front door. “Where is your father? I wish he was here with us.” She poured herself a cup of plain green tea, sipping the steaming hot beverage and refusing to meet my gaze. She just continued to watch the road, and it was then the first pangs started- a sense of wrongness and foreboding filling my mind.
***
My mother and I stayed inside the rest of the day, waiting for my father. She grew increasingly worried as the hours passed, but she wouldn’t allow me to go outside to look for him. I ended up sitting next to my mother and pouring myself a cup of tea. She grabbed my hand suddenly, squeezing it tight and looking me in the face for the first time.
“Something bad is going to happen, I think,” she said. “Or maybe it’s happening already. No matter what, I want you to know I love you. I love you as only a mother can love her only child.” These words only increased my sense of dread, and I didn’t know what to say. My eyes watered, and I felt like I might start crying. My mother had never been so explicitly and openly emotional like this before.
“I love you too, you know that,” I said, trying to force a smile. My mother didn’t return it. She just went back to staring outside at the dying day.
Finally, around dark, my father came running up to the house, his face covered in sweat. He flung the door open, running right past me without even looking at me.
“We need to leave the town immediately,” he said to my mother, tears streaming down his face. “I think it’s too late, but we need to try.”
“What’s wrong?” my mother asked. “Did you see what the Japanese left us?” My father shook his head, closing his eyes.
“The neighbors and I went to look at the so-called ‘bomb’ that dropped from the sky,” he said, his voice quickening and rising as he spoke. “What we found…”
“Why would you go out there?” my mother asked. My father continued to keep his eyes closed, refusing to meet her gaze.
“We found dead fleas inside a massive shattered ceramic shell,” he said. “Thousands of them, some smashed flat from the impact. And all around the area, tens of thousands of live ones, very active. They were jumping around like crazy. I got bit quite a few times.” He paused for a long moment, his face still troubled and pale. I stood up and started laughing.
“Fleas? Father, why would you be scared of fleas?” I asked. “That’s much better than them dropping a real bomb! We’ve had flea bites before. That’s not such a horrible thing, is it?” My mother and him looked scared, but I couldn’t figure out why.
We fled that night, packing our bags within minutes. We went to the next town over and stayed with my mother’s parents. But after a few days passed, our family discovered we hadn’t gone nearly far enough.
***
My grandmother came in on the third day after what I jokingly called the “flea bomb attack”, holding a basket of goods from the local market. She complained that her head was pounding and her stomach hurt. My mother felt her forehead, exclaiming that my grandmother had a high fever.
“Oh, I’m sure it’s nothing,” my grandmother responded, flipping a hand as if she were shooing away a fly. “Probably just something I ate. I’ve survived much worse than a little stomach ache, I can tell you that.” She winked at me, showing off her toothless gums as she smiled.
Within hours of her falling ill, countless others began showing symptoms. Like falling dominoes, the sickness spread through the entire village, swarming the countryside with its black, fetid rot. It started with headaches, stomach pains, fever, diarrhea, chills and sweating. At first, it looked like the flu, or sometimes just a bad cold.
The moment we saw the swollen, black sore on my grandmother’s neck, we knew it was something far worse. She collapsed in the kitchen later that night while trying to sip water, and my mother and I carried her unconscious body over to her bed. She was covered in sweat, coughing up blood, her skin turning black as the swollen sores spread throughout her flesh. It seemed like the buboes on her neck, armpits and groin swelled before my eyes, massive amounts of pus slowly leaking out of tiny holes all over the wounds. The tip of her nose had started to turn black with dark, sickly purplish splotches all around it. We all knew she would not survive for much longer.
I went to my grandmother with a cool cloth. She looked up at me with glistening, tear-streaked eyes, confused and rambling.
“Oh, is it time for the harvest already?” she said. “I thought it already came.”
“Grandma… it’s me, Jing,” I said.
“Jing?” she said, squinting her eyes. I saw a trickle of blood running down from one nostril. Taking the cloth, I started to wipe it up, but then she started coughing, bending over double. After a few hacking coughs, she spewed out a trickle of dark, thick blood, spitting it onto the covers. “I’m sorry, mother, I forgot to tell father about the lamp oil.”
She looked above me, staring at something only she could see. She began to cry. As she turned her neck to the side, the swollen, pus-filled bubo burst, the black skin rupturing as dark, stinking fluid spewed forth.
“Mother! Please, it’s me. Take me home,” she said, continuing to ramble, staring around the room at people only she could see. I turned and ran, unable to take anymore of it.
My grandfather had complained of headaches and chills earlier in the day. A few hours after my grandmother, he also collapsed. We found him laying on the threshold of the open door, groaning and moving his arms, reaching out as if for someone to pick him back up. Huge swollen pustules shone from under his armpits and from the sides of his neck. We put him in another bed. He also quickly became delirious, talking to people who weren’t there. As the sun set, I knew they would not survive long.
Things had gone from bad to worse when I looked out the window into the night beyond and saw the first Japanese soldiers coming, dressed in white biohazard suits and gas masks that covered every inch of their skin.
***
I heard knocking on the neighbor’s door, hard and insistent. I moved the curtain away from the window, peering out, my small heart beating fast. Everyone in the house besides myself was, by that time, showing symptoms of what we then knew without a doubt to be the Black Death.
We had heard countless horror stories of the Black Death. With up to seventy percent of people dying in some areas, it was one of the most feared and horrifying diseases imaginable. Most of the townspeople would have fled that night if they hadn’t been vomiting blood as their skin turned black.
My mother ran over to me, her face pale and sweaty. She wavered on her feet, looking like she might collapse. Then she took a deep breath, closing her eyes and bracing herself. When she looked stable again, she knelt close to me.
“The enemy is outside,” she whispered. “We must hide you.” I nodded silently. I heard shouting coming from next door. Behind the curtain, I caught glimpses of dozens of men in clean, white biohazard suits and gas masks walking calmly and confidently onto our road. After another few seconds, a hard knock sounded at our front door.
“Quick!” my mother said, pushing me across the kitchen and towards the oven in the corner. We had a large, metal oven back then in addition to the fireplace. Due to my father’s position, we were better off than most of the people in our town. Some still lived in cold, unheated shacks and ate rice and water for every meal.
The oven had a flat top grill and, of course, used firewood, seeing as this was back in 1941. We didn’t have electricity in my parent’s home, and neither did my grandparent’s. As far as I know, in fact, no house in the area had electricity.
She opened the door. The cold interior of the oven had ashes and small pieces of twigs forming a uniform carpet. I sneezed as the cloud of debris swirled around us.
“No time for that!” my mother hissed as I coughed and choked. “Get inside, child! Now!” Without thinking, I began to crawl through the tiny door. I could barely fit inside the oven. She closed the door all the way, locking me in the cramped darkness. Curled into a ball, I felt like a fetus imprisoned in an iron womb.
A final, bone-rattling pounding on the door started. I heard my mother’s footsteps as she rushed away from me. A moment later, I heard the door creak open.
“Come, come,” Japanese soldiers said in broken Chinese. “You come now.”
As a child, I was extremely bright. Even as a young girl, my vocabulary was well beyond anyone else in my grade. I had also picked up some Japanese, since we were near the puppet state of Manchuria, a vassal of the Imperial Japanese Empire during World War 2.
So when the Japanese had finished clearing out the house and stood talking to each other, I understood bits and pieces.
“What do we do with these logs?” one asked. I felt confused. What logs?
“These ones, maybe…” I didn’t understand everything he said after that, but he kept saying the word “fire”.
Later on, I would find out that the Japanese always referred to human experimentation victims as “logs” to help dehumanize them, to make it easier to burn or dissect them alive, or to inject them with horrifying biological and chemical weapons agents.
As the last of Japanese left the home, I felt sick to my stomach. Curled inside in the oven in the fetal position, I began to cry, giving up all hope that things would turn out OK.
**
Things quickly went from bad to worse when I tried to leave the oven and found the door had latched closed. I was in total darkness inside the oven and barely had room to move. A sense of suffocation began to come over me, a feeling of being buried alive.
At first, I whimpered as I kicked against the door with whatever force I could muster. It didn’t even seem to shake in its frame. I increasingly became panicked, kicking and punching at it. Then I started to scream for help.
“Hello?” I yelled. “I’m stuck! Is anyone out there! Please let me out!” I don’t know how long this went on for, but it seemed eternal.
Suddenly, in the midst of my yelling and kicking, the door flew open and light flooded my eyes. I fell out, gasping as tears streamed down my face. I looked up, expecting to see my mother, or maybe a Japanese soldier, but it was neither.
Three gaunt Chinese faces looked down at me, men with guns in torn, dirty clothes. I gaped at them, wondering if they were here to kidnap or murder me.
“It’s OK, little girl,” one said to me, kneeling down and brushing my ash-streaked hair out of my face. “We’re partisans. We were on our way to attack the Imperial Japanese and put a stop to their monstrous actions.”
“Where’s your family?” another one asked. I looked up at him, seeing he only had one working eye. From it gleamed compassion and understanding. The other was blinded, covered in a cataract, as white and dead as a corpse.
“They took them!” I said, crying harder. “They made us sick and then they took them away.”
“What’s your name?” the one-eyed soldier asked.
“It’s Jing,” I said.
“Well, Jing, my name is Chen. This is my group. We are meeting up with other partisans in the area, armed men who will protect you. You’re safe now.”
“No, no, we’re not!” I said. “Just listen…” And as Chen and I stood in the dark kitchen of an empty town, I told him everything that had happened since I first saw the ceramic bomb falling from the sky.
***
The soldiers did not look happy when I told them about the fleas and what happened. The two behind Chen had panic in their eyes as I finished the story.
“Chen, this means we may all be exposed to this disease now!” one said, sweating heavily, his greasy hair sticking up all over his head. Chen did not seem distressed. He looked like the calm eye of the hurricane in the midst of panic.
“Whether we were exposed or not,” Chen said, “this changes nothing. We will continue with our mission. In fact, this only makes it more pressing. We know where the Japanese took the townspeople. We must put a stop to it.” I agreed with Chen, mostly because I hoped they would save my family, especially my mother. I figured it was probably too late for my grandmother and grandfather. A sharp pang of sadness pierced me as I thought about them dying from the plague in some freezing cell, alone and delirious.
With my head down, deep in thought, I followed them out into the night.
I saw strange fluids littering the roads under the moonlight, dark patches of what looked like blood intermittently marring the dirt road. They were still wet, contrasting with the bone-dry conditions outside.
We left the town, and I followed them down another dirt road. After about an hour of hiking, we came upon it.
From the distance, I saw a massive building. It looked rather nice from the outside, and even had a balcony hanging over the front door. Every window had bright light coming out.
“It looks like someone might be home,” I whispered to Chen. I had walked next to him the entire way. We hadn’t talked, as he was afraid of making too much noise.
“Regardless, we’re going in,” he said quietly, looking around for something.
A few twigs cracked and more partisans came walking out of the woods, saluting Chen. Now the entire group of partisans was up to seven.
“OK, let’s do it,” he said with fury on his face, the desire for bloodshed stamped into every word. “According to our plan, as much as possible. Don’t let a single Japanese doctor or soldier survive.” The rest of them nodded, and without another word, they began sprinting towards the building, some moving towards the front while others veered off around the back of the building.
Chen turned to me.
“I have to go in too,” he said sadly, kneeling down before me. “Will you be alright out here by yourself?” I felt shocked.
“I want to go help rescue my ma!” I responded. “They took everyone from me. I should be involved too.”
“You’re just a little kid who can’t use a gun,” Chen said reassuringly. “Just stay out here. And if I don’t come back within thirty minutes, get out of here. Go find some family you can contact- anyone at all, a cousin or an uncle. Get away from here. This place is poisoned.” He rose, turning. With a last glance around the open field leading to the Unit 731 building, he broke out of the cover of the trees and began running.
***
Gunfire erupted from inside the building, shattering the calming nighttime ambience. I saw flashes of light erupting out of the windows. It wasn’t contained in one spot, but rather seemed spread throughout the building. First there would be a long, sustained fire from the front of the first floor, then seconds later, another burst from the side of the third floor.
And then everything went deathly silent. A man ran out of the front of the building, one of the Chinese partisans. He had lost his gun somewhere and stood, covered in blood, his left arm ripped off at the shoulder, spurting great, arterial streams out of his body. He tripped over his own foot, tangling his legs together, and landed hard on the wound. Crying and choking, he called for help. No one came.
Seconds later, he stopped moving, dying on the ground in front of my eyes.
I decided I should go in. I remembered what Chen told me, but I decided he was wrong. This was my family, after all, not his.
As quietly as possible, I sprinted past the dead partisan and into the open front door. Bright lights shone all down the hallway, illuminating the gore and splattered blood along the white walls and polished floors. A dismembered arm with its finger still around the trigger lay at the side, discarded like trash. Without another thought, I shook the limb loose and lifted the gun up.
Now I would do it, I thought to myself. Now I was just like them. I had a gun, and I was here to save my mother. Nothing would stop me.
I spun around, deciding to go deeper into the building, when something stopped me.
Chen stood there around the next corner, leaning against the wall and bleeding heavily. His scalp looked ripped open, his face a mask of gore. I looked down at his chest, realizing I could see the organs inside. His intestines looked like deep-red worms trying to slip out of the ground. He had one hand on the area, trying to keep his organs inside.
“You…” he said, breathing hard, “need to run.” He stumbled, falling to his knees, putting his hand out towards me. “Get out of here, now. They’re all dead. I found no one…” He fell face-first on the ground, a spreading pool of blood forming around his body.
I walked past him, not believing. I found a stairwell, deciding I should start with the basement.
I looked in the first room, seeing stainless tables side by side. On each lay a body. Some were pregnant women, their faces twisted in agony, their stomachs cut open. Fetuses and babies lay next to their mothers, also dissected.
Against the back wall, I saw entire babies preserved in glass jars filled with liquids. Next to them, I saw human heads, hearts, livers and intestines.
In disgust, I left, going to the next room. In this one, I saw dozens of burn victims, their bodies blackened into a crisp, some of them also dissected. As I walked past, one of them began breathing, moaning something incomprehensible. I saw fire-blackened fingers twitch as the person tried to raise their hand towards me. Chen had been wrong. Someone was alive.
Then I heard the deep, guttural breathing from the hallway behind me. With my heart racing, I turned, raising the gun.
An abomination stood there, something from the depths of Hell. Sewn together from many body parts, it had five legs, the stitches black and ugly against its naked skin. It towered over me, its heads scraping the ceiling.
I saw the ten arms sewn onto its long, snake-like chest flexing and clenching. From many of the stitch wounds connecting the limbs to the body, a dark, sickly-smelling fluid dripped down. It had three heads on the top, all mutilated, their cheeks sliced open, showing the grinning teeth below. I saw animal and reptilian eyes staring out from the heads, implanted next to human eyes.
After a moment of shock, I pulled the trigger. The recoil from the gun was far stronger than I expected, but since the creature was so tall, I still ended up hitting it in the shoulder.
It shrieked as black blood began to run down its pale skin, its voices rising together in outrage and pain, its many legs starting to move and scuttle forwards.
I turned and immediately fell over the body of a Japanese soldier, still dressed in a white biohazard suit. I felt the creature’s fingers closing around my ankle when someone yelled from behind me.
“Hey, you!” a woman cried loudly. A burst of gunfire rang out.
Turning in surprise, I saw my mother, standing there with a stolen gun from a Japanese soldier. She had sores from the Black Death all over her skin, and her nose had turned dark from the necrosis. She stumbled forwards, firing as she went until the gun ran out of bullets. I saw blossoms of gore sprouting all over the abomination’s body as bullet after bullet ran through it.
When the gun finally clicked empty, she threw it aside. Then she jumped on the abomination, biting and clawing at its skin like a rabid animal. I turned and ran, never looking back.
***
After the Japanese infected our towns with the Black Death, the Chinese government came in and walled off the areas. They are still off-limits, the area poisoned and dangerous.
I had a DNA test done later in life, out of curiosity. They told me many interesting things, but one of the most interesting was that I have a genetic mutation that causes me to be resistant to the Black Death. It is, I think, the main reason I survived.
The horrors I would see after that bomb fell scarred me for the rest of my life. I still remember the sick, sweating people with black pustules the size of eggs, like a baby pushing against its mother’s body to get out. I remember the eyes of the women dissected alive, their fetuses ripped out of their bodies, their faces still open in expressions of eternal horror.
None of that will ever leave me. What Unit 731 brought us was hell on earth.

[[[Been procrastinating on XXXXXL post— 😈]]].
So, you ended up homeless.
Me, too.
Depending on state or local programs in your area, different amenities may be available for your use while out on the streets:
THE PSYCH HOSPITAL
Going to the psych hospital sucks. Hang in there. Take the meds, make your bed, eat the food, remain calm (ask for anxiety meds as needed), wash your ass & comb your hair—you'll get out in no time, a few days to a week with any luck.
Meanwhile, the people working there can help get you set up with benefits like that good government insurance (Medicaid) whenever you've been run penniless by this horrid economy. Also, once the hospital people help set you up with a mental or behavioral health agency, in my state, you will be assigned an agent or case worker who will get to know you, ask you about your goals for yourself (completing the housing application, gaining sobriety, employment, food stamps, etc). This person gets paid to help people like you achieve your goals so you can stay safe and stable with your own place or a place for your family... so be nice to them. Be vocal about your needs, polite yet assertive. Remember that everyone has their own feelings, struggles, & rich inner lives.
Filling out paperwork aggravates everyone, but in just an hour or so appointment of being processed with an agency, you can receive so many benefits, which are blessings when you have mental health struggles. YOU just have to keep your phone on or check into your email often (which you can probably do at your local library on the WiFi or computers) AND keep your case worker's number written down on a card or wherever so you can update the person with your new information whenever your (slow but generally functional) government phone craps out again. We'll talk phones next in a moment.
Remember that you can ask your case manager to accept mail for you at the agency, so you can receive your food stamps card, free phone, insurance cards, and other mail updates. When you get to the agency for your appointments, you can request to see your case manager when they have availability (they are busy but get a lot done for a lot of people!) and ask whether you received any mail. WRITE DOWN & Keep or MEMORIZE the agency's address and your case manager's name & number.
Sorry to be repetitive, but I see too many people out here on the streets hopeless, clueless about their housing application status, downtrodden with addiction or depression issues. PLEASE. Never, EVER give up hope.
Housing takes a few months to go through the waiting list, so KEEP YOUR CONTACT INFORMATION UP TO DATE with your agency and case manager and doctor so they know exactly how to contact you at any time. It could happen at any time! You have to communicate in order to get your needs met. SHOW UP TO APPOINTMENTS or call, at least, to reschedule. Then, one day, BAM, you're in a motherfuckin' free/affordable apartment. BAM.
Keep your fuckin head up. If nobody's told you yet today, know that I love you. I believe in you. You can do this. You have this extra strength in you that is hidden from yourself deep inside, and this will shine through while reality tests you right now. Remember, God or whoever only puts you through that which you can bear. When you think you're about to die out there, really, you've only used half your strength. You can prevail through this and thrive in the future. You have a future, too.
FREE PHONES
Once your medical insurance or food stamps (SNAP/Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program) application gets approved, you can receive a free smartphone with unlimited talk, text, & data. Some companies have a small bit of free hotspot offered each month, too. Most also have extra stuff you can buy at discount, but I do mostly stick to the free stuff.
One time, the government sent me a badass Galaxy S9 just for free! Someone knicked it one day a week or two ago. Shame. I mean, we were already on the Galaxy S24, but honestly it was something much nicer than I would have bought for myself. Rare, but there are companies that provide very good phones. The service is like bad but not the worst in the world. Definitely get a message to someone eventually, and here I am posting about it on Reddit and Twitter.
I mean, hey, free phones. Can hardly complain.
You can get at least one free line per household.
I'm talented at breaking phones; I go through an average of 4 or more a year.
Google "{your state} free government phones" for information. Company websites will pop up, scroll til you DON'T see "sponsored" next to the link, then click the first one or two.
I've completed the short applications before from the library computers, then usually received the phone in the mail in about a week.
Sometimes out in the city, they will have tents ready with phones right there to activate.
All you need is an ID sometimes, a Medicaid card, a food stamp card, and/or none of the above, in some cases.
ASK OTHER HOMELESS PEOPLE IN YOUR AREA FOR LOCAL TIPS
Communication with locals in the community can help a lot. Remember to be kind to people. Not "too kind". You know what I mean. Don't be taken for a fuckin sucker, but at the same time, maybe offer a cigarette or something nice, water, a snack from your stash, in exchange for news about job opportunities or places to get free phones, charge up devices, free food boxes, and where to get your fix when you need one.
The online phones I had shipped tended to work faster than the ones from the tents, but even a semifunctional phone is a serious godsend out here. Get one. Do it.
Even if you're not fuckin homeless. Savd $50+/month if you receive any benefits at all, you can probably find one. Hurry. They're cutting back the programs.
LIBRARY
The library is a temperature-controlled, relatively quiet, calming, safe space to hang out and think, sleep, get free snacks (they smack, too) by asking someone at the front counter (sometimes they have something; get there early).
Sorry—so many multiple thoughts at once. Getting manic. Need to go hospital maybe soon. NBD. Just a week or so.
Charge devices in the library outlets, snooze on a table in the cool A/C, eat the free food when available, get on the free computers or the WiFi to get business done or relax, attend the homeless luncheon every other week (I keep missing mine! I need to go), get information on where to find free food boxes in town or get hot meals.
GYM
Shower! Shower shower shower sing in the hot AF shower.
Lift weights when you have the extra energy or stamina—do NOT strain yourself right now. Take it easy.
Some gyms have pools, jacuzzis, or hydromassage beds. That shit's medical, right there. Keep your back from getting too fucked up while you hike around your home in a backpack or whatever.
You get stronger every day you're out there just hauling your stuff.
SHELTERS
I think they have too many rules and don't really have much to say here.
Go there to ask for food or a safe place to sleep and set your stuff
Some are legit, others are sus.
Keep up and pay attention. You can do this.
Be smart. You have smarts. Think through that stuff you need to do. Solution-oriented thinking, absolutely NO or minimal doomin-n-glooming, NO stinkin' thinkin. It WILL get better.
I know, I'm a nut.
If it's not okay right now, then it will be soon.
Count small blessings. Hydrated? Working phone? Fed? Air to breathe? Feet (maybe)? Eyes? Ears? Relatively healthy-ish, at least enough to read this? Yeah. You got it. Gratitude over everything. Small blessings. Let alone if you know anyone who gives half a fuck about you... That counts a lot
Tell that person thank you for supporting you during your struggle.
General tip: thanking someone for being there is better than apologizing for having rough times. Nobody wants to listen to you say sorry over and over again. Stiff upper lip there. Growl. Show me some stank face. Game face. There ya go. Stay positive or at least realistic about stuff. Acknowledge the worst possibilities and try not to go there. How can you succeed for yourself?
Some shelters have hot meals at certain times during the week, or else sack lunches or food boxes available while you wait for your stamps card.
You can say you're actively starving on the phone during the food stamps interview, and they'll have the card expedited to you pretty much immediately loaded for the first month.
Complete the paperwork and turn it in online OR in person at the Department of Economic Security (DES) office before the next month starts to keep the card loaded.
You WILL get shut off for being a student. 😭
(Government told me, "Oh, I see you're attempting to better yourself and become a more productive citizen with a collegiate education, and for that you can fuckin starve. $0... Bout to withdraw for now, again. Oh well. Don't let setbacks break your back. Go with the flow).
TEMPORARY GROUP HOUSING
Again, some gold, some sus AF.
Take it easy, choose the right one for you.
They may drug test, breathalyze, or search your stuff.
Still, a bed can be nice when you've been sleeping on concrete or bus stop benches or in the storm drain for a while. Get some goodass sleep on a real fuckin bed.
Worst case scenario, sleep and eat good for a week, then bounce.
Some have required groups to go to, some require payment, and some are through your Medicaid insurance. GET insurance. Sign up witchur broke ass. You have time.
PERMANENT/LONG-TERM HOUSING PROGRAMS
Going to the psych ward can get you up higher on the housing list.
Having a mental break? You go check yourself in before the police get involved to force you into treatment.
I might go myself soon. Depends on whether I sleep within the next few days.
The agency can also help you fill out the housing application and keep your contact info up to date, but it's easy. Did it on my phone in 5 fuckin minutes
Look up "section 8 housing {your state}". The application is quick and easy. If you make only sporadic money or spontaneous income, set the income to zero and keep going. That's what my counselor in rehab told me to do. It's legit only checking if you have a regular check coming in every month or two weeks.
PHYSICAL AND MENTAL HEALTH
Hydrated? No? Go find some fucking water.
If your city's a college town like mine or mining, fracking, aquifer, etc, get FILTERED WATER.
Buy it at Walmart for $1 change a gallon or find a filtered fountain.
Why? Arsenic or other toxic heavy metal levels up to two or even four times over the "safe" level, which technically is ZERO for chemicals like arsenic. These can cause neurological disorders like multiple slerosis. I looked all this up on Google after checking the city records for the water test results in recent years.
Watch out because of course your corrupt-ass broke-ass city could lie rather than fix that very expensive problem
Park fountains aren't generally filtered.
Library or gym fountains MAY be.
Food is important, too. Stay fed. Generally, don't eat food you just find on the ground. You're not a stray puppy... Just leave it be unless situation's that dire (I learned this myself—tummy ache for two days over some blue marshmallow Peeps I found on the ground with 8 left... Oops).
You don't want to be puking out here. That wastes both food and hydration.
I like ginger ale. I get a storebrand 2-liter, then rinse & reuse the bottle once or a few times for water.
Sleep somewhere sometime at least. The library is temperature controlled so you can maybe sleep or at least rest during the day. Talk to other homeless people and make connections.
Don't get involved in a bunch of other people's crazy bullshit. That's not what I said. I mean, find another friend or a few with some smarts and swap ideas, information, get to know each other, maybe find a roommate for later if the application takes too long. You can split rent with a trustworthy friend.
Find a job or some kind of gig to make a bit of cash at least some days. Have a hustle. Trade commodities when necessary to get what you need.
At a certain point, you probably need $5 for laundry or cigs or have a bill on your storage unit or gym coming up soon. Keep it real.
Keep your hands clean. My library hands out free face masks (I don't usually use) and travel size hand sanny bottles (I currently carry 3—kept picking em up each time; good for hand sanitation before eating, after bathroom in the bushes, or starting fires if you camp outside, but sbe careful, ya pyro nut).
Buy butt wipes, foo'!
Wet. Butt. Wipes. Good for hands, too. What else are you going to do when you have to drop one in the woods and only have limited pants with you?
Unless you laundry often, go commando. Air that junk out—breeze feels nice.
Underwear can get a vinegary, very, uh, "YOU" smell after about the second or even first day of use depending how much you sweat or leak.
No use wearing janky panties, but you GOTTA KEEP YOUR BUTT CLEAN in that case.
No skid marks on the pants. Ew. That's how you get denied public transit.
Keep it hygienic, yeah? You don't really want extra problems like hepatitis or HIV.
Use condoms; don't share needles.
Get birth control. Being pregnant homeless would suck. I have an IUD. They stick it up my cervix every 5 years, and I forget about it.
That's about it. Keep your spirits up with music or art or anything you like that makes you happy as long as it's not too expensive.
I enjoy hiking up in the foothills and going to parks on cool mornings to study taking notes.
Some of my favorite subjects? Mathematica, chemistry, and Spanish.
GIVING UP VERSUS BUCKLING DOWN
Don't you ever give up. You are a beautiful lamb and a child of God born to behold this Universe in all its Glory.
Understand that even if no one else can fuckin be there for you, get in contact with a higher power of your choosing
I don't like saying "God". But I still send a short prayer maybe at least once a week and sometimes before I eat when I remember. I don't make a big deal over it. I view prayer as a goal-oriented intention-setting practice.
Pray for the strength to make it happen. Pray to get God or whomever on your side. Then, make that shit happen yourself, encouraged that He or She is watching over you and that you have someone, anyone, stronger than you from whom to draw your strength and stability.
Steadfast. Stay strong.
JOB OPPORTUNITIES
Ask other homeless people. Ask the librarian. If in contact, ask family.
Most of my tips come from short conversations with other homeless people.
Whenever someone does something I don't like or feel uncomfortable around, I find an excuse to skip out onto the next part of my daily journey.
Don't loiter when you can avoid it. Don't trespass too much. You don't want the cops called.
Find a place, a shelter or the gym or a friend's place, to shower at least every other day. No need to be too dirty. Again, hepatitis or similar.
Take your time bathing—dig all the dirt out from under your nails, scrub every inch nook cranny of yourself, folds of & behind ears, all around neck, under the chin, belly button, between the toes, in the eyebrows, armpits, booty crack, anus, taint, and every little bit of your junk. Hot water works well, cold water is better than nothing, and soap makes you smell good again.
Ahhh ha
TL;DR: I'm addicted to DMT now and love everybody and every little fuckin thing so much
Not that I didn't before
I rolled on too much molly
I TOP care for every little bit of everything in the universe, and I love you. Yes, you! You're fuckin awesome, did you know that? You the OG! Keep getting it on getting down with your bad little gangster self
We're each so small in terms of the size of the universe
Sorry not sorry my thoughts are all jumbled up n going too fast, have to unscramble word by word, pluck each out of the multiple many clouds of thought vomit spewing out of and into my head from all directions, put them in order in sentences for you. I like you, though. You're worth it.
Maybe take a break. Long post. Thumbs blurred in my vision typing in my notes app to save for later... I save the information I write mostly for myself later when I forget. M'moments of clarity can be often when well-rested but fleeting on little sleep.
M'concussions
Remember to take a deep breath. Take your time.
I know you're stressed out to the extreme right now, but don't have a heart attack.
Breathe. Slowly, count to 5 in, 1... 2... 3... 4... 5... And exhale, 1... 2... 3... 4... 5...
Do that at least 3 times.

4th Wall here! This one went a little long so I have to keep this short!
Hope you enjoy!
First, Previous
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
​
Benjamin woke up the next morning, wondering if the previous night had been a dream. It was a welcome respite from the constant nightmares of late. He groaned, sitting up slowly and stumbling toward a small wash bucket of relatively clean water sitting on a sorry replacement for a sink. Something clinked under his foot, pausing his listless lumber. He lifted his foot to find the key to his room, shifted from a perfect charred outline on the floor. Ben slowly knelt to pick it up, “So, not a dream.” He murmured to himself, shivering slightly at the implication. He washed his face and armpits quickly; it would have to do for the time being. He silently hoped there was a river or a stream nearby as he was rapidly becoming unable to stand his own smell. He was just finishing up when a loud thumping echoed three times, “Benjamin! Do you live, pink skin!”
“I’m awake,” Ben bawled back unlocking and opening the door to see Jukha’s raised eyebrow.
The Orc chuckled, “We can clean the road off us later, Lets go. I have some iron arrowheads to replace, and you need a dagger, and coin.” He turned with a wave of the hand, “Come, The ForgeMaster lost his latest apprentice. Maybe you will have luck there.”
“Is that like a blacksmith? I’ve never done any work remotely similar to that.” Ben asked as they stepped down the stairs into the ground of the Inn. It was early, and thankfully most of the peoples Benjamin had seen last night were not present. It did not stop shadows from echoing in his face as they departed.
Jukha seemed to either not notice or choose to push Benjamin from his thoughts, “You said that your academy training was in making machines and other things right?”
“Well, Yes; after a fashion.” Benjamin stated. “Its, complicated.”
“Well, it cant hurt to see.” Jukha sighed, walking along side Benjamin for several more paces, “You’re, not a fan of slavery, are you. I’ve seen it in your face; ‘was worried I would have to keep you from tryin’ to kill someone last night.”
“I…” Benjamin hesitated, worried about how much of his earth he would say before becoming seen as a loon, or worse. “Where I come from, most places will throw you in prison for trying to own another person. My great great grandfathers fought a war over it. They left their home in disgust to fight against their own kin, because of slavery.”
“Ah… I see. Unfortunately, the Realm is unwilling to ban slavery. Too much of the more… civilized… provinces would rise up if they did. You saw those girls, the thin ones.” Jukha paused.
Ben immediately tensed up, “I did. I know what they were for...” He growled.
“Be warned Benjamin.” Jukha stated in a low voice, “There is much history behind their bondage. Their kind chose the wrong side in a war, generations gone. It is the reason that few of their people live outside of chains.” Benjamin speared Jukha with a viscous gaze, but the Orc continued, “I don’t like it, I think they have been punished enough; but most peoples you will meet do not share this view. Tread carefully, pink skin. Most of the Realm does not see them as a people. And the rest, they are usually paying of a debt, being punished for a crime, or were born into it. In that way, anyone can end up a slave.”
Benjamin understood the tone of Jukha’s statement. He was but one man. Benjamin needed to learn more. ‘Dam Sol, I need to know more about this Realm, This world. This conflict Jukha talks about.. dammit!! I know nothing!’ Benjamin cursed himself inwardly for not pressing his guardian angel, the fucking Sun if she were to be believed, about the details of this place. The smell of smoke, oil, and hot metal broke Ben from his brooding. The two of them stepped into a dark shop from which the odors were emanating.
Yet a new language bawled and growled from the back, and a man from the same race as the ones holding the slave girls rounded the corner in a full-on tirade that Benjamin could not understand. Anger flared for a moment in Ben’s chest, but he crushed it soundly. The blacksmith was the same race, but a different man altogether. Ben chose to keep his eyes open.
“Qort! You wound me! I brought you a new apprentice!” Jukha smiled widely, slapping Benjamin firmly enough between the shoulder blades to force him to take a step forward.
“Aye, did ye?” The Blacksmith spoke back in Orcish, eyeing Benjamin, “Ye don’ look’ike much. Y’ever swung’a Hammer, boy?”
“A hammer yes,” Benjamin started, “For blacksmithing? Never” he finished, remembering this world’s sensitivity to lies.
The Blacksmith walked closer, stroking the strange wriggling beard before snatching up Benjamin’s right hand and turning it over in his rough fingers. “Aye, You’ll bleed fer’ta first week’or so.” He reached up, and grabbed Ben by the shoulders, almost inspecting him for signs of strength. “but, Ye’ll do. a silver’a month, room and board provided. Ye’ll be up’at ta’sun, n’down well after it sleeps. What say’yee.”
Benjamin glanced over the Jukha, who only shrugged, “It’s a pretty fair deal for unskilled labor.” Benjamin was about to voice his concerns, but something caught his attention. Looking across the blacksmith shop he saw various metal pieces strewn about, but that was not what Ben noticed. He felt oddly drawn to this place. He stared into the fire roaring in the Forge, almost singing to him… “I… I’ll do it.” The words fell out of his mouth before Benjamin could think to stop them.
“Good! Now, albino, wha’do Ah Call’yee.” The Forgemaster smiled broadly enough for Ben to see his dull yellow teeth from under his strange living hair of a beard. Ben raised an eyebrow at ‘albino’ and The Qort only laughed a rolling thunderous laugh, “Ah Know an Albino’n I see’on. Don’worry boy, It matt’rs not to me. Just that yee’can work.”
“Benjamin, my name is Benjamin. Just call me Ben.” Ben responded with bemusement. He wasn’t going to argue what he was when, at his core, he truly had no idea. He felt human, he looked human… but it appeared that Human’s weren’t a thing here, so Albino Orc it was. “I don’t really have any belongings. I can start when you need me to.”
“Drive! I like’ee. I’ll-ve fresh beddin’ fer yee by the evenin’. Go ahead’n start wit’tha Broom.” Qort waved to the rudimentary broom in the corner. Benjamin suppressed a sigh, having guessed just where he was going to start.
“On it, boss” Benjamin responded, crestfallen. Jukha and Qort shifted to Qort’s native language as Ben began where every bottom level employee begins, sweeping the floors.
________________________________________________________________________________________
The first week was indeed as Qort advertised. Benjamin was the blacksmiths apprentice in the lowliest of definitions. The heavy work, shovelling coal, working the billows, moving heavy armfuls of scale out back as well as fresh metal in took its tole and scabs turned to calluses by the second week. Benjamin could feel his bones creak and his muscles ache as he worked, but the pain was ignored. He watched Qort work with fascination and welcome distraction. Benjamin had learned the name of a new people. His employer was Durranis, or Durr’s (Dure’s) in short, and was indeed the same race as those he saw in the Inn upon his arrival.
Qort had explained that His people tended to either be high level forge masters, or slavers. He cared not one way or the other regarding slavery, and he assumed that anyone who found themselves a slave was simply either unlucky or deserving. Qort also put name to the Realm they resided in. Orcish race was apparently split into two casts. Jukha was apparently part of the cast known as ‘Orgose’ whom made up the majority of the Orc population. This caste had a manner of honorable vocations; Scholars, Alchemists, Miners, Litigants, teamsters, Textile masters, cobblers, and the like. The second Orc cast were the called “Octorese”. They tended to be much taller and stronger than the Orgose, and they had only one of two vocations, soldiers, and nobility. They ruled this Realm, the Octorallus Principality, with what Qort described as a harsh but fair hand.
The Octorallus Principality was one of several kingdoms Scattered loosely about the “singular” landmass ringed in islands. Principality territory extended as far inland as the FeralWood. There were technically borders, according to Qort; but most borderland was largely lawless and largely ignored. The ocean coastline created a natural eastern boundary, and it was dotted with Islands that the Principality nominally claimed if they were inside their northern and southern boundaries. When Benjamin asked what lies beyond the Islands, the answer was simple. “Aye, there’s only Tha’Edge. N’body com’s Back Frum’it.” That had been the end of it in Qort’s mind, but Benjamin was giving a gift of understanding just where this world stood in their development.
Benjamin swept the floors until the fourth week. The first day of the fourth week, Benjamin finished working the forge starting bellows, but was asked to stay. Qort began breaking down raw iron ore from his latest delivery, and melting it down into ingot pucks. Benjamin found himself oddly entranced by the process, almost as if the forge called to him. It was a strange feeling, born from deep in his chest that almost urged him to reach for the bellows, or ask about adding charcoal. Benjamin forced himself to follow instructions, watching as Qort withdrew the ingots to cool. The week’s new duties continued until the fifth day. This day Qort retained a pair of glowing pucks, hammering them flat before using a wedge to cut the still glowing metal into pieces. Soon he had a stack that he placed back in the forge.
Benjamin listened to Qort, barely able to pay attention through the distractions of the forge, but he assisted as the Durr hammered out a crude knife, a bit longer than a skinning knife, but not quite a short sword. It had a broad flat single edged blade that would have most closely resembled a drop point on Earth. The blade had a thick spine with a flat that was a bit widely angled. The edge, however, appeared serviceable. Benjamin watched as Qort worked the metal over, before dropping it into an oil bath to quench. The forgemaster slipped a simple small cross guard from his pile of pre forged parts and slipped it over the tang. Qort next selecting a set of wood grip scales, using pair of what Benjamin assumed were brass dowels to serve as anchors. Qort hammered the scales in place before offering the blade to Benjamin. “Finish’t” the Durr said simply, but continued upon seeing the confusion of Benjamin’s face, “This’s ta see where’yee fall. N’where Aye need’a start teechin’ yee propper.” Quort stated. “Aye’ll be at’tee Inn. Don’ burn down Mee shop”
With that, a stupefied Benjamin was left alone in the Forge, and the Durr Forgemaster departed for the Pub at the bottom of the Inn. Benjamin just stared at the three quarters finished knife. Its wooden handles were ugly square things suck in place by protruding brass dowels. “Finish it, he says. How the fuck do I do..” The forest, Son of Terra Benjamin reeled around to find himself alone, but not. His eyes fell to the still smoldering forge, and that indescribable feeling returned. It made little since, but he felt himself pulled toward the forge. His mind began to flash through all of his old metal structures and materials classes and the world around him began to blurr. The only thing in clear focus was the knife in his hand, and materials science information flying into his mind as if delivered by a fiber optic cable. He found himself focusing on the blade, removing the wood and fittings. Concepts flowed, Oxygen, Temperature, carbon… Benjamin watched in both horror and fascination as the metal blade began glowing red hot in his hands. Thermal barrier, Kevlar, airgap separation techniques raced through his mind as the molten metal rose from his finger tips as Benjamin found himself refocusing on his mental image of steel. He knew steel, inside and out. He had worked with it many times during his college courses. This was… different… and Benjamins began sweating as the blade heated up. Heat: 1700C…. add oxygen and cabron… agitate… separate… cool… The moment Benjamin thought of the cooling process the glow began to fade from the metal. Soon it touched back down in his hand only slightly warm. He reached for the wood and brass just to find them still in his other hand. They fitted back on perfectly and Benjamin grabbed a file. His fingers were shaking violently, both terrified of what was happening and completely unable to stop. He dropped the file, and as he did, a memory of an old “Bowie” knife his dad bought him for his 13th birthday flashed into mind. Benjamin shook his head to clear it, looking back toward his task at hand to see the blade hammer itself out as if by invisible stikes. The shape of a bowie knife, complete with furniture, settled onto the table next to Banjamin… and he passed out.
____________________________________________________________________________________________
“Benjamin. Oi! Pink’skin,” Benjamin opened groggy eyes, looking up at the disturbingly wriggling beard of Qort, accompanied by a not-so-subtle smell of ale, “What’ee doin on’a floor o mee Forge.”
“I, Uh.. I passed out..” Benjamin mumbled, slowly rising, “I think.. I need to rest.” His head was spinning, and his brain hurt in more places than he knew it could. “I feel, ill.”
“Hmm” grumbled the forgemaster, “Git, yee left a mess. It best’bee cleaned’up by mornin’.” Benjamin only nodded weakly, stumbling into his room before face planting into his bed. He was snoring before he landed.
Qort swore at the mess, but noticed a completed knife lay on the table. He frowned as he approached it. It was not the knife he had given the Albino to finish. It had the same grips, the same dowel material and color. Its handle scales were simply carved but serviceable. It wore the same crossguard, but that cross guard was deburred and semi polished. The blade was a strange shape with its tipped turned up and a small chunk out of its spine. It made for an intimidating sillouette, and Qort picked it up. He was mad at the boy for using his furnace, but could not punish him. His test had been too vague, but this was not the blade of a first timer.. The scales were on properly, and the Cross guard was tight. The balance seemed to be slightly different, and the metal seemed… off… Qort casually reached over to his files, pulling one he usually used to test incoming ore with. He slipped the file over the spine with practiced ease, but froze at the sound. The blade… rang.. it was a small thing, heavily muffled by his own grip on it, but it sounded different from an iron knife, and Qort looked at his file to find its teeth almost completely flattened. This knife his apprentice essentially just reforged, had ruined one of his expensively strong files, and there was no damage to it at all. Qort set the fill down, placing knife next to it with shaking fingers, and turned to watch the Albino apprentice snore loudly in the other room.
____________________________________________________________________________________________
Benjamin woke with a start, the sun was coming into his window, and that meant he was very late. He stood up quickly realizing he was still wearing his work clothes from the night before and there was no time to change. As he stumbled out to the forge, Benjamin saw Qort, sitting in a chair with unfocused eyes, Idly tapping the knife on an anvil. The blade was held with deftly loose fingers, allowing the metal to ring with each tap. “Benjamin, please sit. I am in dire need of questions answered, and you will be answering them” Ben stood stunned, Qorts usual heavy accent was completely gone, replace with a polished Orcish that seemed a touch formal for the small nameless village on the edge of the FeralWood.
“I..Ok.” Benjamin mumbled, slowly walking to a chair that Qort had placed across from him. Benjamin sat slowly, eyeing the knife in Qorts hands as the flood of last nights memories assailed him.
Qort took a long breath looking at the knife now laying on his Iron Anvil. The unhardened hunk of metal showed the dents and dings of a well used unhardened tool. Benjamin had noticed similar damage on Qort’s metal hammers. “Benjamin, My anvil, and its hammers were gifted to me upon my graduation of the Royal Academy for Iron Works. They are the hardest forms of their material that is not to brittle for their purpose.” He picked up the knife, “This has destroyed every file I have taken to it.. and dented both my anvil, and one of my hammers with a single strike. I will have to reforge the hammer. Tell me truthfully, this is not the same blade I gave you to finish.”
“It is.” Benjamin started with, “Or at least, it started as that knife.”
“Do not lie to me son. It took me 5 times as long with my finest wet stones to sharpen this blade.” Qort state sharply.
Benjamin took a deep breath, “I.. don’t know how to explain it to you, at least not properly… I swear to you that it is the truth.”
Qort growled a humm, standing to pace across his smithery. His eyes fell to the basket on his counter that held some of his spare or undersized ingots. “Show me.” He ordered, taking three of them out, handing them to Benjamin who just looked at them. “Show… Me…” Qort’s voice was deadly serious as he picked up one of his hammers, holding it at his side. Ice cold spikes of fear arced their way down Benjamin’s spine, Jukha’s words on the seriousness of falsehoods ringing in his ears
.
“I… OK..” Benjamin relented, slowly standing to take the offered pieces of metal and slowly stepped toward the forge. He had no idea what he was doing, and his mind started racing. Qort had started the forge this morning and it sat roaring in front of him as Benjamin stared at the metal in his hands, panicking.
*The Forest, Son of Terra*, Benjamin heard it and spun to Qort in shock, only to see the Durr’s eyebrow quirk in a very ‘well, I’m waiting’ expression. Benjamin realized that the Forgemaster had not heard the same voice. *The Forest* that ethereal voice rang in Benjamin's head as he turned back to the forge. His mind seemed to be guided back to that night in the Inn, and he smiled as the familiar pull from the previous night returned.
​
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
As always, Just giving this a look is always enough! If you feel I've earned it. You can read the next Episode early on Patreon along with shorts from other series.
First, Previous, Next

Hey! I’ve been non-stop researching about my symptoms for the past week and I honestly don’t know what’s going on with me 🤔
⚠️ I’m not trying to get a diagnosis online- I do have a hospital admission tomorrow for further investigation. I just wanted to hear some stories if you’ve been in a similar position to me, or any advice to put my mind at ease. I’ll definitely update what happens later!⚠️
I’ll try making this as short as possible-
Some information about me previous to what’s been happening:
-I have been vaping (no cigarettes like ever) since 2019, and smoked a lot of Shisha from the ages of 16-25* I’m currently 29. -I’ve had a cough on and off for the past 2-3 months- idk sometimes I feel like it’s triggered by my vaping but I’m not 100% sure -At the end of 2022 I was hospitalised for 10 days for Covid. I had received a throat & lung scan and there was nothing much said apart from the doctors telling me my lungs were inflamed & they can see I smoke -Im also diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder so my mood has been fluctuating a lot in the past week* -I have issues with going toilet I.e. rectal bleeding from piles (literally everyone in my dads side family has it including my youngest brother however no family with cancer) which I have seem the doctor about. They suspected colon cancer so they ordered a stool test to rule it out. I ended up doing the stool test and it came back negative
So a week and a half ago I caught a cold from my family (I live alone), so when I went back to my place I noticed my throat was itchy, got a normal cold including cough, runny nose, itchy throat and ears etc.
I eventually recovered after 4 days or so. I noticed my left armpit had become swollen but I couldn’t find any lumps in my breasts or armpit. It feels like fat or tissue in my left armpit near my left breast- so I booked a gp appointment which was for the next week. After a day or so of feeling better from the cold I noticed my throat started hurting but the pain would come and go in different areas of my throat.
The next few days, additional to my throat hurting on and off, pain appeared on my lower chest. So under both my breasts I feel a lot of pain (pain level probably hovering between 4-5/10) which wasn’t constant at first but over few days it feels like it’s there now without coming and going (if I press on it, it aches). There was a moment where I was bending down (after intense rectal bleeding) and I started feeling dizzy. I tried everything to feel better such as deep breaths, drinking water, sitting down but it got so intense that I couldn’t feel my arms and legs and everything around me turned dark. I ran to my friend who was asleep with all my might and I collapsed but I was still conscious. I was crying and telling her I’m going to die (feeling of impending doom). I returned back to normal after that episode. On this day I noticed the swelling of my armpit went down but my armpit felt a bit achy. (Still feels achy today).
In the last two days I’ve had pain that’s come on my back under my shoulder blades on both sides as well as pain on my left side of my neck going down my left arm. I feel bit itchy under my left armpit at times and decently itchy under both my breasts.
—————————
SO, two days ago I went into A&E ( I couldn’t wait for my GP appointment) and after everything I told the doctor I’ve been experiencing… she told me I’m just experiencing intense anxiety. I was kind of shocked and went home convincing myself I’m okay. However the next day is when I experienced more pain around my body as mentioned above. So I went back to a&e and they had me do a blood test. My bloods indicated:
Red blood cell count : 74 (norm is 115-155) *Anemic which explains my constant dizziness for the past 4 days. White blood cell count : 12.8 (norm is 4.0 - 11.0) *Doctor diagnosed me with lower tract lung infection.
However when I rang the GP they told me I should do a further investigation including having an iron injection & go on iron tablets. I’m being admitted to hospital tomorrow morning and I’m scared shittless. I’m literally convinced I have something serious. 😭
Feel free to message :) 🥹♥️

Hi all, I was taking prednisone for a virus. I was taking 20MG 2x a day for 5 days. After finishing up, about 24 hours later I started to feel as if my lymph node under my left armpit was swollen. Woke up the next day and basically all my lymph nodes around my arms, neck, back felt aching & hurt. This is the second day so about 36 hours later and I’m still feeling this way. Not sure if this is the general body aches & pains people feel coming off of prednisone but has anyone experienced this?