Sore throat itchy ears runny nose

Do I need to retest? Anxious
I had unprotected PIV (finishing inside) 6 months ago, I developed a sore throat 10 weeks after the encounter and went to urgent care where I got antibiotics and felt fine a few days after taking them. Then got a bf and we dated for 3 months and were unprotected PIV(finishing inside almost everytime) for that 3 months I was with him, I suffer from migraines already but 2 weeks after breaking up I developed everyday tension headaches and I was put on heavy headache medicine and we still haven’t got to the root cause of them. I did a full STD panel 72 days post any sexual contact which was also 202 days post the first unprotected encounter with the first guy as well. I did a 4th gen AG/AB blood draw from a vein through my hospital and it came back non reactive, my lab work is labeled “HIV antibody test” but once I click it, it is labeled all of that I stated earlier. It came back non reactive. Is this conclusive? Do I need to retest at all? I was negative for everything else as well, I feel my anxiety is just probably getting the best of me at this point cause drs ruled my sore throat as an ear infection draining and my tension headaches as most likely severe stress and sinusitis. If I would’ve gotten anything from the encounter 202 days ago, would it show by now? How about 72 days ago? My lab was quest diagnostics if that changes anything or if anyone knows anything, I was negative for everything else. I think I’m just really anxious cause some online forums say 90 days but others say 45.

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I’ve been sick for 3 weeks on and off and it’s really starting to take a toll on my mental health. Any suggestions welcome.
Week 1 - high fever, 102 feeling overall crummy chills, super sore neck, ears popping etc
Week 2 - felt ok but ears still popping, very tired and stiff neck still
Week 3 - ears popping, 99 fever on and off, terrible sore throat, swollen grands, stiff neck, runny nose
What doctors have said Week 1 I didn’t see a doctor bc fever went away
End of week 2 doctor said maybe sinus infection but just take ibuprofen
Now at week 3 I am on my second day of a Z Pack but just still feel terrible, no energy
What could it be

It's been 3 months ever since I had an episode of my whole body aching especially my back pain which got really worse to the point I couldnt sleep from the pain and even sweated and had a mild fever 37.4 celcius that night. The whole body/bone pain has been going on for a few days prior to developing that fever for one day but I felt like I was going down with something. My neck has been bothering me for a while I dont cough but it felt sore inside/weird. I did a cbc everything normal, crp, esr normal, ANA normal, ca-125 normal, LDH normal, igA, Igg, Igm normal, ultrasound showed reactive nodes with a more prominent one in the right side of my neck which is palplatable and measured 9.5mm and was described as a hypoechoic oval shape (lymph node?) In the report. Chest x ray clear. A hematologist felt my nodes on my neck and then my groin ones which are pea sized but dismissed them. For the past months Ive been having muscle spasms and discomfort on my legs, and hands which comes and goes like the burning feeling in the inside of my throat. I also get pressure in the sides of my head and there are swollen occipital nodes that cause me discomfort too. It feels like my muscles are really tense. Also I have really weak muscles/tendons/hip flexors? In the side of my buttocks especially the left one which becomes more intense when I open that leg or rotate it inside. I also get some burning sensations spreading from my chest to stomach and sometimes I feel cold. I also get random pain on my jaw and under cheekbones. Most discomfort was noticed during the night or laying down. I still experience back/hip pain from time to time. Also my left ear is sensitive when I hear something loud or touch it it makes something like echo ear drum? Also been seen by an ENT doctor who said I was clear. Should I look into this further or could this be due to a virus after 3 months? Possibility for Sjogrens(mildly drymouth, also vagina with frequent candida infections, dry eyes and have always had problems with cavities, dry nose) or TMJ? 6months ago I also had a neck and brain MRI which showed back left bone spurs in A4-A6 level that could be pressuring the A6 root. I've also worried about lymphoma because I got some mild night sweats that could be connected to anxiety and nightmares, were not drenching and after xanax use they havent appeared for a few weeks. What has been constantly bothering me though is the lower back pain muscle spasms and that weird stiff feeling on the sides of my hips and that tendon/nerve/muscle stretching/spasm deep inside left buttock.

Hey guys, I just need to vent and have people to talk to I guess.
I’m a 36F single parent , I only have my young teenage daughter and my elderly mother so I don’t really have anyone to talk to.
This will be a long post because I just need to get it all out there.
It all started mid January 2024, I was suffering severe pains in my stomach and rib areas and was vomiting mostly liquids/ stomach acid , I went the the emergency room a few times I was sent to have ultrasound done on my gallbladder, kidney and liver- results were normal , my GP put me on acid reflux medication since being on that the pains have gone and the vomiting it’s every once in a while compared to a few times a day.
Then in early February 2024 I started to get ringing in my ears mostly on the left side but in both, it never stops, my ears felt blocked/ muffled (no pain) I also had a feeling of something in my throat. I went to see my GP again who checked inside my mouth and noticed my left tonsil was swollen so she put me on antibiotics which didn’t work so she did a second course I ended up going to the emergency room as I noticed a weird thing on the bottom of my tonsil towards the front it looks like a skin tag? Not sure how to explain it but I was freaking out , the ER doctor said it “looks” like a small cyst nodule and did blood test , he said I don’t have a bacterial infection and to stop the antibiotics, if the cyst was there still in 3 weeks to go back to my GP. After 3 weeks the cyst was there still, I still had the issues with my ears and the feeling of something in my throat but it felt higher up more like the back of my mouth. I went to my GP who then referred me to a public ENT I got an appt with them for March 8th, I went to the ent appt and I was a complete mess, I just said straight up I think I have tonsil cancer so he got me to sit in the chair so he could scope up my nose/ down my throat, I asked him is it cancer and he said “ I don’t think so “ then he went to go get his boss which made me freak out more. In came the boss which seem to be nice he had a look with his light and eye piece and said that my left tonsil is slightly bigger than my right and was firmer he also said he didn’t think it was cancer. He said he wanted me to come back in 5/6 weeks for reassurance. He asked me to see my GP to get my anxiety sorted and also suggested I go visit my dentist to get teeth cleaning done as I have tartar ( I’m a smoker )
They sent a report to my GP which states on the report about having my tonsils removed and biopsy done. Why would they say that if they don’t think it’s cancer …. I’m a complete mess. Surgery absolutely scares me.
I was meant to have my next ent appt on the 16th of May but have just received a letter saying that it’s been postponed to the 29th July
I noticed about a month ago I have a swollen lymph node on the left side going along my jaw from just below my ear. It was tender to lay on to begin with but now there’s no pain but it’s still very large maybe 2-3cm in length (from ear going towards chin ) it’s not rock hard but it’s firm, I can move it only a tiny little bit
I’m just so scared , I’m scared that having to wait so long to see the ent that if it’s cancer it’s going to spread even more and then not be treatable

I cannot breath out of nose I can't sleep my heart Is so racy from being anxious my sore throat is alot better today but I feel absolutely horrible and am so afraid that it'd gonna make me sick

Hi guys, looking for some advice here. I have come down with a virus, nothing serious but i keep sneezing and having to blow my eyes and my eyes are all watery etc. Mostly just a sore throat and head ache whilst being bunged up. My first economics exam is tomorrow morning, I will definitely be going. I rang my college for advice and they basically just said they advise i definitely attend, which I would have anyway. I’m worried about disturbance in the exam hall, from my sneezing and having to blow my nose etc and just general spread of germs. Any advice here?
Of course exam performance is on my mind but I am well revised and tbh these things happen.

Last week in a post-deleted by the OP, there was discussion about how there is no point in stockpiling antibiotics and any attemps for lay people to practice any form of health care in a widespread grid down disaster was a waste of time
Myself and some colleagues wrote: Survival and Austere Medicine
Edit. New link. in a post below.
We are slowing working on a 4th edition with some new material and minor corrections - but it is taking longer than we thought!
But I thought given the above post, I would take the opportunity to post the introduction - which address the "why bother" question for a major long-term grid down situation. Apologies for the formatting and length
"There is a sense, when considering the issues around survival medicine practice, that everything is overwhelming, that it is impossible for lay people to provide a high level of medical care and maintain a high level of population health.
We don’t think this is the case at all. We believe that intelligent lay people with some basic medical knowledge, skills, and equipment can deliver high quality health care. While it is obviously impossible for lay people to safely and competently deal with every medical problem, and there remain many complicated diagnoses requiring equally complicated or technologically advanced treatments, for 80- 90% of the health problems afflicting humanity, simple things done well are all that is required to preserve life and limb and help alleviate suffering.
Consider the following:
1. Remote Medicine Practice:
Below are the results of one of our author’s experience in the provision of health care in various remote and austere locations (some third world, some first world) to nearly four thousand people over a cumulative 30-month period (spread over 18 years) – with more data there are few minor changes from the 2005 2nd edition, but the list is essentially the same – which is interesting. The record keeping was a bit unreliable at times, but the following summary is reasonably accurate.
Top 20 presentations (representing > 95% of consultations):
1. Minor musculoskeletal injuries - ankle sprains most common, included many minor fractures which didn’t require more than diagnosis and simple care
2. Upper respiratory tract infections
3. Allergic reactions/Hay feveAnaphylactic reactions/Rashes
4. Minor open wounds – included a mix of lacerations needing closure, many needing
cleaning and advice only, and some infected wounds
5. Gastroenteritis/Vomiting/Diarrhoea
6. Mental health problems
7. Sexual health/Contraceptive problems
8. Skin infections/Cellulitis
9. Dental problems
10. Abdominal pain - 4 confirmed acute appendix (2 treated with IV antibiotics and
subsequent delayed appendix removal / 2 required evacuation) + 1 gangrenous gall bladder. Many were "no cause found". Of the remainder with a clear diagnosis the most common were renal or biliary colic)
11. Fever /Viral illness
12. Chest infections
13. Major musculoskeletal injuries (fractures/dislocations)
14. Asthma
15. Ear infections
16. Urinary tract infections
17. Burns – mostly partial thickness within the realms of management in the environment the
patient was in. Several required evacuations. Several required rehabilitation due to location and sub-optimal initial treatment.
18. Chest pain
19. Syncope/Collapse/Faints
20. Early pregnancy problems
Major trauma was uncommon but was seen including several fractured femurs and a dozen cases of multi-system severe trauma resulting in a mix of in-country surgery and evacuations
Top 12 prescribed drugs (representing >90% of medications prescribed):
1. Paracetamol (Acetaminophen)
2. Loratadine (and other assorted antihistamines)
3. Diclofenac (and other assorted antiinflammatories)
4. Combined oral contraceptive
5. Flucloxacillin
6. Throat lozenges
7. Augmentin (Amoxycillin + clavulanic acid)
8. Loperamide
9. Nystatin (and other antifungals)
10. Hydrocortisonecream
11. Ventolininhalers(Salbutamol/Albuterol)
12. Morphine
What is of note here is that the clear majority of problems dealt with are simple and straight forward – there is still potential for serious consequences but there is scope for a well-informed lay person with a basic knowledge and access to a reasonable collection of reference books to provide reasonable care. Equally the vast majority of medication prescribed are from a very narrow well defined list – despite the fact 1000’s of drugs are on the market – the list of core lifesaving or comfort preserving ones is relatively brief.
2. Why children die
The World Health Organization (WHO) has identified the following conditions as having contributed to >75% of worldwide deaths in the under 5-year age group (in no particular order):
Pneumonia Pneumonia is an infection of lungs. Prevention of this condition is somewhat limited – although good nutrition, clean and warm housing, and a reduction in the exposure to respiratory irritants (smoke) all can help. However, the most common bacteria which cause pneumonia are frequently sensitive to penicillin – which is discussed later in the book and can be produced in a low-tech environment.
Diarrhea Death from diarrhea (dehydration) is almost 100% preventable with appropriate use of oral rehydration therapy. Dirty water or poor food handling causes much diarrhea – this can be virtually eliminated by proper hygiene practices and care with drinking water.


Pre-term delivery While we are limited in the direct interventions available in an austere environment to mitigate this problem contributing factors to early labor are young age, malnutrition, smoking, poor maternal health, so there is scope for indirect intervention based on optimizing mum’s health and environment. For babies who are born prematurely the necessities of life are warmth and breast milk. With attention to detail for both things, it is possible for infants as young as 33-34 weeks to survive without high-tech intervention.
Malaria. Prevention is better than a cure, knowledge about clearing stagnant water, mosquito nets and long sleeved clothes can significantly reduce the risk. Equally quinine is derived from the bark of the Chincona tree and the Chinese have been using the herb, Artemisinin, effectively for the treatment of Malaria for years. So, while not as easy to treat or prevent as diarrhea, there is still scope for significant reduction in death rates in low-tech ways.
Blood infection Blood infection or septicemia is rapidly fatal. The ability to intervene depends on the cause of the infection and antibiotics available. Broadly, infections causing septicemia can originate from the skin, the lungs, the kidneys or bladder, and the abdominal contents. While specific treatments for these may be lacking in an austere environment – all have prevention strategies and basic low-tech treatments that can be lifesaving when applied appropriately.
Lack of oxygen at birth Of these problems, this is the one with probably the least scope for impact. Unfortunately, even if foetal distress is detected during labor (with heart beat monitoring or signs of distress like meconium), without the ability to deliver the baby quickly options are limited. That said, a caesarian section is not a massively complicated operation (and discussed in Chapter 10), and in parts of the third world is performed by trained lay people with safety and success.
Measles Again, there is limited scope to intervene directly with the disease. Measles is always around and while vaccination reduced the incidence of epidemics, sporadic cases still occur. In the absence of vaccinations epidemics of measles every few years will be inevitable. There is however some scope to minimize the spread during an epidemic with isolation and respiratory precautions during outbreaks. While some of the serious neurological complications are unavoidable in a
Prevention is better than a cure, knowledge about clearing stagnant water, mosquito nets and long sleeved clothes can significantly reduce the risk. Equally quinine is derived from the bark of the Chincona tree and the Chinese have been using the herb, Artemisinin, effectively for the treatment of Malaria for years. So, while not as easy to treat or prevent as diarrhea, there is still scope for significant reduction in death rates in low-tech ways. small number of patients, basic care such as maintaining hydration can also prevent complications such as dehydration.
Neonatal tetanus The prevention of neonatal tetanus is easy. You don’t let the site where the umbilical cord attaches to the baby get dirty. It is as simple as that.
HIV/AIDS Prevention of maternal infection is the key to prevention of infection of newborns. The steps required to prevent exposure to the HIV virus are widely known: abstinence (not undertaking sexual activity), monogamy (maintaining a single sex partner rather than multiple) and if neither is a palatable option, then safe sexual practices.
Most the conditions above have an element of either preventability or the ability to be treated to some degree in an austere environment and significant improvements in mortality and morbidity can be made.

3. The greatest advances in medicine
Several years ago the British Medical Journal ran a poll trying to identify top medical advances of the last 200 years. The following is the top 12 from that poll:
Sanitation 1st Antibiotics 2nd Anaesthesia 3rd Vaccines 4th DNA 5th Germ theory 6th = The oral contraceptive 6^th = Evidence based medicine 8th Imaging 9th Computers 10th Oral rehydration therapy 11th Smoking cessation 12th =
Just as with our discussion above about the causes of childhood deaths, this list is introduced to show just how much impact a very basic health care knowledge can have in terms of optimising health in a post-disaster or austere situation.
Of the biggest advances of medicine in the last 200 years, between 7 to 9 (depending on your knowledge and available resources) of the 12 can be applied to care in a austere situation. In particular, the knowledge of sanitation, germ theory, oral rehydration therapy, and simple manufactured antibiotics and anaesthetic agents all have the potential to be able to be continued to be applied in a post-disaster situation and to continue to contribute to a high quality of low-tech health care. In the same way that we can substantially reduce childhood death rates in a low tech post-disaster situation, we can still continue to have access to some of the biggest advances in medicine even at the end of the world.
4. Surgery in the third world
A non-specialist surgeon working at a isolated bush hospital in Papua New Guinea published his experience of Emergency Surgery over a 14 month period (similar articles have been published with similar data):
Emergency Surgery 243
Tendon repair 33 Open orthopaedics 32 Dilation and curettage 31 General surgery 29 Incision and drainage 26 Laceration repair 26 Obstetrics 23 Manipulation under anaesthesia 15 Urology 15 Gynaecology 9 Ear, nose and throat 2
Emergency anaesthesia 243
Ketamine – spontaneous breathing 166 Local anaesthesia 33 Ketamine – ventilated 16 Spinal anaesthesia 12 Propofol / thiopentone 10 Epidural 5 Epidural / GA 1
The point of this reference is to help illustrate what someone can achieve in primitive conditions with no formal surgical training and no dedicated anaesthetist. We are not suggesting that the average layperson can safely practice to this extent or breadth of surgery, but it does demonstrate that a non-surgeon can achieve much. It also shows that most anaesthetics for surgery in an austere situation can be done under local or ketamine anaesthetics.
Why this is relevant?
Each of these four references gives you insights, one way or another, into low-tech austere health care. First, it gives you an insight into the likely clinical problems that you may see in a survival situation, and how much can be dealt with in that sort of austere environment. Second, it demonstrates how medically speaking it is the small things and simple knowledge which save lives and some of the biggest killers can be mitigated with these relatively low level interventions or strategies.
In our opening summary – “Medicine at that end of the world”, we describe a pretty bleak medical reality post-SHTF. Will million’s really die from lack of access to modern heath care as we have alleged?
The short answer is yes – many will die much sooner than they otherwise would have, from disease and injury, which currently are not immediately fatal. But the answer is not nearly that simple nor bleak. The reality is that while cancer, diabetes, malnutrition or serious injury may claim many of its victim’s sooner than with today’s health care, most health problems can be treated or mitigated to a degree in a low- tech environment, with a narrow range of medications and interventions – including some cancers, non- insulin requiring diabetes and many major traumatic injuries.
Most medical problems are relatively mundane and not life threatening. Truly catastrophic problems in medicine are fortunately rare. You should focus on learning and preparing to deal with the common problems, and doing common procedures well, and you will save lives, and possibly also improve the quality of those lives.
There will be a significant change to health care but with knowledge and some preparation it isn’t quite as dire as many (including our own opening paragraph) predict. "

I need the otolaryngology medical community’s help, as many physicians have been stumped by my situation. Admins, please read before deciding to delete. I am not a medical professional, but I possess a unique situation that cannot seem to be resolved by the medical professionals available to me. I am not sure how to phrase this without breaking the subreddit’s only rule, so I will try to express it in a manner oriented to my obsessive curiosity to understand my (undiagnosed) condition.
 
For starters, I have no credentials to confidently say anything I am about to; some of it may even be jargon or irrelevant, but I will try my best.
 
Eight years ago, I weighed around 285 lbs. I began an exercise routine that caused me to lose about 20 lbs within a short amount of time. During this period, I developed persistent discomfort in my left ear. I noticed the discomfort after visiting my aunt, where there was a 500’ elevation difference. When I came back home, my ear would not pop. Over the course of a week or so, the ear pressure eventually equalized, but everything sounded muffled.
 
This led me to my first ENT visit. The ENT didn’t really give me much time, and paired me with an audiologist who determined my hearing was perfect. After hearing the unfortunate news of no diagnosis, I asked why I have to pop my ears to hear consistently. I was brushed off and told to see a TMJ specialist. The TMJ specialist told me I’m fine.
 
This is where my independent research began. I determined that my “popping” was actually me forcibly equalizing the pressure in my Eustachian tube by repeatedly moving my jaw. I went to an in-network ENT. This ENT took offense to my self-diagnosis of Eustachian Tube Dysfunction (ETD) and told me my issues were allergy-related. I was referred to their allergy department and put on immunotherapy shots. After completing my treatment and reaching maintenance, my issue persisted.
 
Frustrated, I looked online for the highest-rated ENT in my state. This doctor did not accept my insurance, so I decided to pay out of pocket to get the issue resolved. This doctor’s niche was rhinoplasty, and he was the first (and so far last) to give me the time of day. He performed a nasal endoscopy and a CT scan of my sinuses. Both tests revealed nothing of use. He noted I have a slightly deviated septum, but not nearly enough to cause any of my symptoms. However, he did note the sinuses on the side where I’m experiencing discomfort were inflamed. His diagnosis was chronic sinusitis. I was prescribed Azelastine 0.1% (137 mcg) nasal spray (an antihistamine). I used this medication for about a year in conjunction with Flonase, but nothing changed.
 
Once again, I sought out a different ENT. This ENT also took offense to my description of symptoms because I used medical phrasing (ETD). After a brief consultation, I was told once again that my symptoms were allergy-related. I went back on allergy shots, reached maintenance, and once again the issue persisted.
 
At this point, I gave up and didn’t bother refilling my prescriptions or finishing my shot treatment. Over the course of a year or two, I developed a severe sinus infection that went several months untreated. It came to the point where I was unable to breathe out of my nose at all, affecting me to the point my family members became concerned, as now there were comorbidities (such as sleep apnea). I eventually saw a pulmonologist who made it clear I needed to see an ENT and get my sinus issues fixed.
 
Thinking that maybe if I stuck with the same ENT and followed the trial and error process, I went back to the last ENT I saw. I was diagnosed with a sinus infection and prescribed medication. For the first time in months, I was able to breathe again after excreting from my nose what looked like petrified mucus. With this small victory, I returned to the same ENT and expressed my frustrations. I passionately described the location of my discomfort and explained that I believe the Eustachian tube problems I’m having are not the issue but a symptom of something else. I explained that I feel a mass or some sort of inflammation in my throat and mentioned the inflammation found by the previous ENT who performed a nasal endoscopy.
 
That was a mistake. After expressing my frustrations, I was diagnosed with "globus hystericus." Initially excited to finally have an explanation and a treatment plan, I was disheartened when I was told he could no longer assist me and suggested involving different medical professionals. When I got home and googled my new diagnosis, I realized he was referring me to a psychologist. Needless to say, I didn’t return.
 
Unable to accept my new reality, I resorted to more independent research. Before I even say this, I want to strongly express how much this improved my symptoms. Mewing, changing my tongue posture, and stopping mouth breathing drastically improved my Eustachian tube pressure over the course of a year. Using a jaw exercisegum daily also significantly reduced my ear pressure issues. Although the discomfort was reduced, it was not fully resolved. Sometimes I’d use a massage gun on my jaw, chin, bridge of my nose, head, and neck, which helped with mucus and provided temporary relief, especially lower in my neck near my chests, this seems to what felt like drain mucus/fluid. I am 120% able to the breath better after, but the “mass” still felt present.
 
After a while, my circumstances relocated me to a different state, giving me a new opportunity to finally resolve this. I saw a new ENT, and I gave the full rundown of my symptoms and history. I mentioned every medical ailment, bad habit, and quirk I have ever experienced. I mentioned my frequent regurgitation from overeating, how sometimes ground beef or rice seems to get stuck somewhere in the back of my throat, how I sleep on the side where I’m having discomfort, and how I pick my nose in the morning. I also mentioned that I can feel when my ears are producing wax and can remove hot wax with a Q-tip in real-time. I mentioned having tubes as a kid (as I mentioned to every ENT). This ENT diagnosed my issue as being caused by the acid in my regurgitation irritating my sinuses. I was prescribed Omeprazole 40 mg. I took this for a while but realized it was a bandaid on a bigger issue. I needed to prioritize my weight and eating habits.
 
I eventually started measuring my portions and eating slowechewing my food better, which fully resolved the regurgitation issue. However, I still occasionally get food stuck somewhere in my throat and definitely stuck in my soft palate. I have had my tonsils and adenoids removed when I was a toddler, but I can’t help but wonder if something grew back and is trapping food (I assume this would show in a CT scan).
 
As of recently, my latest symptom is hairs coming from the back of my mouth. Initially, I thought they were beard hairs, but after the fifth or sixth time, I became fully certain that single strands of hair are coming from the side of my mouth where I’m experiencing discomfort. I can replicate this over a long period of repeatedly opening my jaw (like I have Tourette’s) in an effort to equalize the pressure in my ear. I did some research, and it sounds like it could be a million different things. So once again, I have an ENT appointment coming up.
 
Now we’re caught up. I started to about a year ago still use the nasal spray and Flonase daily, and I even have a tablespoon of raw local honey. I have ZERO allergies. My ear pressure has progressively gotten worse over the past month, with the frequency of hairs increasing due to my constant need to open and close my mouth for pressure relief. I am not sure what to even tell this new ENT. I need experts to help me navigate the landscape of this condition.

Hiii! I'd like to start off by saying that it's tragic that there are others that share my suffering of having unwanted dogs pushed on them but I'm glad I'm not alone in that. None of you deserve it and I really hope that your situations get better someday because living with shitty dogs you never wanted fucking sucks! I myself am currently coping with a situation surrounding my dad and two dogs that belong to our neighbours. Allegedly at least. In reality? Hmm... bit more complex than that - I don't know if I'm just being overdramatic, it is kind of jumbled and really long, but I'm just so tired of dealing with this and I want someone to hear it
For some context behind the living situation, I am unfortunately at a few months into 27 still living with my parents who rent a townhouse 🙁 It's my own fault really and I have a feeling the situation I'm in now may be fate's rendering of judgement on me for growing up into a failure. It's a really long story but the summary is that I was in a deep depression spiral for a bunch of reasons leading me to make sooo many poor financial and educational decisions starting around late elementary school to last year. About 2 years ago I finally started taking steps towards fixing my problems which included some soul searching within, but I think I've got another year or two yet before I'd consider myself comfortable enough financially to finally get out of here and away from this demented doggy day care more or less for good. For what it might be worth, while I don't pay rent I do help out with chores and pay for various things in general - I've fronted pet supplies and vet bills, gas, groceries, purchased furniture, kitchen tools, paid my mom's car insurance when she's been late on it because of my dad's drinking, paid for maintenance stuff such as some supplies to fix holes or damage that my dad puts in walls and doors, among other things like you know, random stuff that needs fixing haha. I want to think I'm not a *complete* parasite, but I totally understand if you still see me as one. Really, I get it. I promise you I'm trying and I will be useful one day. Until then though, 😔
My parents currently own 3 dogs and 2 cats so it's already pretty crowded here and to top it off I have a mild allergy to pet hair so the only time I ever have a clear nose is when I'm out of the house: a 10yr old schipperke named Kallie, a 4yr old golden retriever named Sundance, and some kind of mix that reminds me of a GSD mixed with a pitbull I guess that's like idk 2-3yrs old - her name is Suzuki and she's a rescue that my parents brought back after selling something to a Kijiji buyer. Dunno her breed exactly though. The cats are a black cat named Ninja that we've had since 2014 and a tabby stray named Loki that followed us home from a dumpster a few years ago so we decided to keep her. I love them both so much and Loki is especially dear to me and is actually closer to being my cat than my parents' cat - I am 100% taking her when I leave. They are relevant to this further down trust me.
For the record I don't have issues with Kallie and Sundance and actually do love them a lot despite the fact that I'm not actually the biggest fan of dogs - they're an exception, and I warmed up to Suzuki about a year ago though she has an issue which is relevant for the problem animals.
Several other dogs that weren't ours have been through this house in the past as my dad is well, soft-hearted and naive when it comes to specifically animals. Some of them have been problems. Some of them represent Problems. All of the extra dogs have been unilaterally his decision and any voice of disapproval ignites a conflict. Right now there are 2 other dogs on top of the family 3 and these two are the Big Problems™️ rn: the first one is a shitzuo (emphasis on the SHIT) named Keno or Kino or who fucking cares I'll just call him Keno. The other one is a mix of something that looks a little like Suzuki, but is white and might have a little chihuahua in him. His name is Benji. I'll start with Benji since I actually have sympathy for his owner and as much as I find him annoying he has some potential to be a decent dog one day if given the proper support, but that's not my problem as it's not my dog.
Benji is a younger doggo, about a year old. His owner is a single mom currently going through a bad divorce from what I hear which honestly is really unfortunate and I do hope her situation improves someday. He's kinda friendly most of the time, but his owner has still not gotten him fixed, which is an issue particularly because of how much time he spends in the same house as Suzuki, who my mom has not gotten fixed either despite my offers to pay for it and attempts to schedule it for her. I regularly stop Benji's attempts to mount her, but I know I won't be able to stop it forever and I'm terrified of the outcome. Every time I bring it up to my parents, I am either blown off with a half-thought response or (in the case of my dad) straight up yelled at and threatened as this dog is apparently just "playing" or "fighting for dominance." 🫠 I just don't want to have to exist next to a bunch of puppies that my parents are completely incapable of taking care of but there's nothing I can do about it. God, imagining the noise level and smell of the house makes me shiver. Aaaaaa. Benji is also an extremely pushy and jealous dog as he's still very young and isn't being trained adequately by either his owner or my dad - I cannot pet the family dogs without this little annoyance trying to worm his way in and interrupt. One positive I can think of is that he at least defers to me and folds over in submission the moment I express any kind of disapproval. Well, that and he isn't Keno.
Keno is.... a fucking NIGHTMARE that is driving me to insanity and I am devoting basically the rest of this rant to this untrained monstrosity and its neglectfully absent handlers. I have never, in my entire life, EVER, hated a dog more than this shaggy, aggressive, shrieking rat. It all started about six months ago when some neighbours who I've never met in my life got this stupid idiot dumbshit animal as a rescue. My mom let it come over once and I had one of those really bad gut feelings. My dad then suggested to them that he could keep an eye on it, as both of the owners work all day and don't get home until later while my dad is at home usually as he's on disability. From then on this curly-haired terror has been at our house almost 7 days a week, for at LEAST 12 hours a day. Let's see if I can describe just much I hate this animal without hitting a character limit.
The dog wasn't (and still isn't) yard trained or outside-trained in general. This dog is like 2 years old or something and every time I've brought it up my dad freaks out and says "that's not going to happen, that's just how he is! Get used to it!" My dad's solution is to cover our ENTIRE front entrance into the building hallway in piss pads. Yea, training pads. These are filled up multiple times a day - sometimes multiple times an HOUR ... you can imagine the amount of garbage this creates which my dad then complains about having to deal with (he's the ONLY reason this dog still comes here) - and yes, he throws the used piss pads in the KITCHEN TRASH, YOU KNOW, THE ONES WITH FECES AND URINE ON THEM 🙃The dog regularly misses too and wastes all over the floor and wall! I rented a carpet cleaner for when I moved rooms and my mom decided to use it after to clean up the entrance way, hahaha, it was pissed up less than 2 hours later! The doors and walls around there are starting to be stained by dog piss and it gets worse when the pads get moved around for whatever reason. If you were to look closely, you may see tiny streaks from where the dog rushed to its mandatory shitting sessions. We used to have a bench beside the door for putting on shoes and stuff, and the closet was actually used for coats, hats, and things. Now the whole area has been devoted to this walking feces factory and on top of that the perpetually soiled pads sit in front of our downstairs bathroom as well. Suffice to say that I have not used that washroom in nearly six months and only make use of the upstairs one now. Petty? Maybe. Legend has it that some of my makeup is still in there.
As mentioned earlier, from what I've been told this dog is a rescue. It has behaviour problems. Crazy, I know. You'd be shocked to know that its owners are not experienced with handling rescues. It barks at many, oh many things. There is not a single multicellular organism in this city that this thing has not barked at. When it gets let outside, the very first thing it does is run to the end of the yard and shriek at the sky! And this thing is one of those dogs that has the projection of a large dog, but the bark of a small one. Yea, it's actually piercing, and if I'm in the same room as it my ears physically hurt when it barks and leaves my ears ringing. Definitely an effective deterrent, as I don't really leave my room anymore while it's here, so I guess I basically don't leave my room anymore except to go to work or cook... Of course this dog does more than bark though! It's actually fairly aggressive, too, because of course it is. You cannot discipline this dog, both because of the coddling my father does for it and the dog's own reaction to various techniques. Very growly and bares its teeth. I went to close the living room curtain once and the dog snapped at my hand, biting me. It has bitten me again one other time when I shooed it out of my new room that I was cleaning out (note: my dad yelled at me later because it's "Keno's relaxing spot" and I'm cruel to take that away from it, don't worry it hasn't been back in since) I'm not allowed to teach this dog in any way, as any genuine attempt from me (mainly out of desperation to make what time I have left in this house livable I don't actually want to teach this mutt, I want it gone) is swiftly shut down by my dad who says once again that the dog will never learn and that's just how it is. GREAT. GET RID OF THE FUCKING THING THEN IF ITS UNFIXABLE. Oh, it's your "duty" to ensure the dog doesn't get put down apparently, because that's what will 100% happen if the dog gets given up according to him. He's not a "killer" 🙄 mf hearing that is unbelievably infuriating this dog will have no fucking chance in the future if it doesn't get given up at least now it could potentially be taken care of by someone halfway decent at it. I've told him multiple times that him ENABLING these dipshit owners is just causing more problems for this awful animal further down the road. I hate the shit out of this thing and I'm still trying to think of its well-being. UGH.
God tho, words cannot describe how much of a trigger this dog's bark is. I hate it. I cannot stand it. It's an audible plague. It worms through earplugs, headphones, walls. I cannot get it out of my fucking mind. Even on the few days this dog isn't here, I can still hear it shrieking away a few doors down. It's barking as I type this part someone save me this dog allegedly was supposed to go home an hour ago. The latest this thing has stayed was until 11:30 PM. What the fuck.
Apparently the dog is fixed. However for some reason it repeatedly tries to mount Suzuki. It does not do that with the other dogs who are all fixed. Huh. Oh, it also likes to rub up against the only part of our couch with an arm rest and has claimed it as its territory - actually briefly fought with Benji over it two weeks ago. Mom said it was a serious incident but nothing came of it, as usual haha. Whatever, point is this dog is a problem in yet another way. I love being told off about not wanting this dog to rub its fucking ass up against my thigh while I'm trying to just sit on the couch for whatever reason at the time.
What makes my blood boil the most about the behaviour though is how this dog treats our cats and even the other neighbour's dog. It's a fucking menace, an actual danger. It chases and harasses our cats in some attempt to police them or something. If Loki jumps onto a high point that she regularly lounges at, he dashes at her and barks at her. If Ninja meows at the door to be put on a leash in the yard, he barks and chases him. This dog has lunged at our cats more than once. I'm scared that something is going to happen to them because those things happen way faster than one can stop them. I don't know if I could handle seeing that image in reality. I really don't think I could. I hope I don't have to and even writing about the possibility gives me anxiety and the fact that my dad jokes about how Keno "definitely came from a family where he was supposed to keep an eye on a cat" just brings me to my fucking limit as it is. I nearly had that sort of scare a couple months ago when Benji and Keno were scrapping in my dad's room. I saw that they were getting too aggressive, but my dad has made it umm, very clear that I am not allowed to police them on it. So yea, it happened super quick - Keno clamped down on Benji's throat and hurt him. While the little guy lived, he now has a semi-persistent cough and at the time I genuinely thought the dog was gonna cross the forever bridge as he was struggling to breathe for like 10min. What changed from this incident? Well, nothing! My dad blamed Benji. I feel really bad about the incident as there was a brief window where I could have stopped it, but my fear of causing an argument with my dad led to an animal getting hurt, even if it's one I'm not a huge fan of.
Where are the owners? Haha. At work apparently. As mentioned, the dog is here nearly 7 days a week, at least 12 hours a day, usually longer than that (7am to 7pm, but this dog has fucking arrived at like 6:10am before.) Weekends are supposed to be a reprieve from this demon, but every couple weekends it'll come over on those days too and sometimes for completely fucking random reasons! Aren't owners usually comfy leaving their dog at their house for two hours? Why the fuck are these people unable to do that? Why do my parents get no notice apparently? Why do my parents take this shit? I am not allowed to voice disapproval towards this dog or the situation of any kind - my dad immediately launches into a tirade more colourful than a pastel palette if I even slightly remind him that I hate this fucking thing. My mom shuts me down - "That's enough.", "Don't", "I don't want your dad to get angry" the last time this happened my dad insisted that either I "love all of them or abuse all of them, no pick and choosing" he then drank himself silly and forgot about it. Why did that happen? I came in the door and pet our dogs plus Benji because he was actually behaving pretty well for once!
Yea the owners are so shitty. Benji's owner has told my mom (who then relayed it to me) about how they find it funny and cute that their awful dog pisses all over our walls and barks teehee 😊 at least Benji's owner tries and walks our schipperke at night sometimes. Keno's diabolical yet incompetent owners very clearly know they have a golden goose in the form of my father who is only spineless when it comes to dogs. He has sadly attached himself to this stupid mutt, and I'm worried that I'm going to have to deal with it for as long as I associate with my parents, at least until it passes. In fact, my dad has straight up said that he considers this dog his own, and part of the family. Many times he has mentioned that poor Keno's "REAL FAMILY" is here in our house. Keno's owners apparently pay my dad $100 a month sometimes for the privilege of letting it ruin this house for a minimum of 60 hours a week. Damn they got a good deal. The owners have other issues too, but basically I just can't believe that this is the hill my dad (and by extension my mom as she's been stockholm'd by my dad) is willing to die on. I can't believe this fucking dog has so much sway in things here. I can't believe my dad constantly praises and gives it love while in the same breath detailling very specifically how much joy I suck away from his life and how much of a regret of his I am. How do I stop being worth less to him than this dog? Before this thing, it was a neighbour's chihuahua named Oreo that also pissed all over the place and yapped. Despite the fact that I'd sometimes exit the shower and have to step over dog shit, I'd much rather have that yappy dog back then keep dealing with this hellspawn. At least back then my father pretended to care about me. I wish this thing would just fucking leave. I wish my mom would actually put her foot down like she says she is. I'm so tired of this. I'm tired of being told about how I'm supposed to just LIKE this shitty dog and how my open dislike of it is animal abuse or some shit that's like actually untrue (what the fuck.) I do my best to just ignore it as much as I can but this dog has driven me to crying fits more than once because it Just. Doesn't. Stop. The reminders are everywhere. It's sunken its teeth into every fucking aspect of life here and I am so miserable. If I could afford it I would move out yesterday. I want out so badly but can only bide my time while bitching like some drama queen because I was an idiot
Wow, this has ballooned way beyond how long I thought it'd be. Oops. Hey, even if you don't read it, it felt pretty good to type.
tldr: THESE 2 DOGS ARE SHIT BUT ONE IS SHITTIER AND THE WORST

I am not the OOP. The OOP is u/ThrowRa-Alergy posting in AITAH
Concluded as per OOP
1 update - Medium
Original - 9th May 2024
Update - 10th May 2024
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AITAH for telling my bf that his daughter is not allowed in my apartment because she doesn’t stop smuggling peanuts in?
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I can’t have any contact with peanuts and I am terrified of them due to some bad experience ms ending up in the hospital. I have my shots now on me all the time. It is not exactly airborne but I could have irritation and if it for example touch something that had been in contact with peanuts i could have swollen eyes and itchy nose and throat. Ingesting is fatal.
She is 14 and has no respect what so ever for my anxiety. My bf and I moved in and she lives with us every other week. Now I told my bf that I don’t want her here because she is not respecting my boundaries. But that I understand that he doesn’t want to live with me in that case we could revert back to him being with me when he doesn’t have his daughter. He got very upset because he said that he loved me and wanted a real relationship and to live in one home.
So I told him that maybe he should be with someone who isn’t allergic then. He thinks I am being very unfair. He said well, she will probably hate the next one too and the next and the next because she wants her mom and me to be together again so it wasn’t “me specifically” that she dislikes. I said that maybe he needs to take a break from dating then until she is onboard but he said that he couldn’t be single just because his daughter wants him to. Before me he was single for 6 years and that wasn’t good enough.
Before we decided to move in together, we have done some “trial” living together and never once did his daughter do anything about the nuts. But now for 4 months she has always peanuts with her. I don’t know why she is doing this. I thought we were cool. She just smirks and says maybe if you are so allergic, maybe you’re not meant to survive(a stand up comedy bit from Louis CK)
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Comments
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ERVetSurgeon
NTA but you need to leave this relationship. She thinks it is funny and he doesn't care. The amount of disrespect for your health is amazing.
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CruelxIntention
This. He’s allowing this instead of getting to the core of it and putting the child in therapy where she clearly belongs. She’s plenty old enough to know this can kill someone and to have complete disregard over that shouldn’t be overlooked. You may love this guy but I’m betting you love breathing more.
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WonderingGemini84

"You may love this guy but I'm betting you love breathing more."

THIS!!!
You can not love someone when you're dead.
The boyfriend doesn't seem to realise how serious "the no peanuts"-thing is. This is a non-negotable. Your home should be your safe space, she doesn't respect that and he doesn't hear you (or doesn't care enough)
Throw them out OP!!!
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weeperOfChimneys
NTA, she has all but said she's attempting to kill you with peanuts. Quoting a comedian doesn't make it funny or acceptable. He hasn't bothered to search her and divest her of the nuts when he picks her up either.

OOP: He offered this as a suggestion. Visitation before she entered my apartment but I don’t want this kind of life. I was fine only seeing him on his weeks off. But I understand that he wants something more permanent than meeting every other week so he probably should find another woman

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YoghurtSnodgrass
She would probably just hide peanuts around his place for you to hopefully come in contact with. Just break up. His kid is trying to kill you.
Where is she even getting all these nuts from? Is her mom buying them for her? Does she buy them from a vending machine at school? How crazy is the little turd?
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**Judgement - NTA*\*
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Update - 1 day later
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Hi everyone! Thank you so much for really caring about a stranger with a dilemma. I was glad that I wasn’t wrong in my guts. I told my bf that I wanted to break up.
He was very sad and tried to reason with me. He suggested that we could live separately. His daughter will soon be an adult. I told him that being 18 doesn’t guarantee that she leaves the nest nor that he stops being a father either. Any time she could come across hardships and wants to move home and she needs to find that home. She couldn’t have it with me.
And about living separately, while it is fine now and some few years ahead. What about the future?
He was silent and listening to me. I felt overwhelmed because I love him. He said that the only way his daughter will be happy is when he is alone. She is in therapy but she has not shown any regards for her father or his life. She seems to not see him as an individual with feelings. He is just a father. I didn’t know what to tell him and just said that she probably needed time to grow up.
Until he moves out, his daughter is not allowed to be in my apartment. She called and threw a tantrum about her father choosing me instead. That she has the right to live with her father every other week and this shouldn’t change. I didn’t say anything, they need to fix this as a family, I am not a part of this family anymore.
He rented his apartment for a year’s contract so I don’t know how he will manage to find a new or terminate the lease so he could move back to his old apartment. Anyway he is staying here for a couple of months.
I am very sad that this beautiful relationship has come to an end. But I need to think about myself now.
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Comments
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he_nooch73
Know you made the right choice for you, your health, your safety. As someone said in your other post ‘you may love him, but you probably love breathing more’. I think you’re right about his daughter never accepting his partners. He needs to address this with her in therapy. I hope her therapist knows about the peanuts because her behaviour is truly disturbing. I’m so sorry your relationship had to end.
Commercial-Ask3416
I feel so bad for you and your boyfriend. I feel like he is stuck between a rock and hard place regarding his daughter. I know people are saying he should discipline her or this and that, but it sounds like it wouldn't work and that she would likely escalate. I work with kids like her. Hoping her not being able to live with her dad the next few months will be a wake up call for her but in my experience I doubt it. Good luck to the both of you, especially him as he has to deal with the fallout. Not your monkey, not your circus anymore.
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I am not the OOP. Please do not harass the OOP.
Please remember the No Brigading Rule and to be civil in the comments

just to preface, i would never do this to someone. hello, food allergy sufferer here o7
cw: childhood abuse, allergy suffering.
growing up, i have always had a hard time with bananas. thankfully, it’s one of my non-anaphylactic allergies. regardless, it’s extremely uncomfortable. my throat, tongue, mouth, and ears get tingly and itchy. my stomach WILL reject it (nausea, vomiting, cramping.) if i ever eat it raw.
back in 2020 or so, my mother would force me to drink smoothies. they would consist of anything she could find in the fridge + water + maybe some random other ingredient. pretty much every time without fail, she would put banana in it and lie about putting banana in there. (needless to say, i knew every single time.) i did not have a proper diagnosis from a blood test at this time, but i remember frequently begging her to not put bananas in because i was (and still am) allergic. (honestly i was begging to not drink the smoothies at all because OAS sucks and they were disgusting. but she would watch me and scream how she’d be laughing over my grave in 10 years :P)
now, my family isn’t new to allergies. i grew up with dairy, egg, peanut, tree nut, and allergies to most meats. but my mother would scream at me how banana allergies “don’t exist” and that she hasn’t ever heard of them.
going straight into adulthood, i got allergy testing done. low and behold, banana popped up as a class 3 allergen (11.5). learned from my dad that my mother got upset with me for getting this done.
this past mother’s day it suddenly hit me that this is still affecting my mental health. i literally don’t know what to call this. assault? poisoning? reckless endangerment?
i’d love to know, it would help a ton. thank you for reading up.

This weekend, Ajax Budokan invited Kodokan 9th dan and former head of the Tokyo Police dojo, Michio Fukushima Sensei, to conduct a 4 hour clinic for Kodokan Goshin Jutsu. It was open to yellow belt and higher, though the majority consisted of Yudansha. My senseis had the honour of demoing the kata, as Fukushima Sensei's health did not permit presenting each technique multiple times, though he did show some of the finer details, demo mechanics, and gave comments as to what was good and displayed what could be fixed. He also talked about older versions of the techniques and how/ why they have been changed. Regretfully, it totally slipped my mind to film during the seminar, as there was a lot of good information, translated (and left untranslated) by the interpreter.
Some General Notes on Fukushima Sensei Fukushima Sensei on multiple occasions mentioned how one should carry themselves and move, more specifically he talked about how he usually sees toris get away with bad shisei as uke's attacks are generally to kind or passive, and that if they genuinely attacked, most toris would be off balance. Additionally he mentioned that a lot of IFJ competition now is power judo, where the technical aspects are replaced for brute force and speed.
The main note he makes is to keep the knees alive (slightly bent and bouncy like a spring), and that most novices have a tendency to straight leg their kata. He also made it a great point to explain the logic of the waza in the kata and how the kuzushi is created. Other important details he talked about were that uke shouldn't be a limp noodle once his attack is over, that tori should keep good sabaki (unclear if sabaki was short hand for tai sabaki as he also stated tai sabaki on different occasions (the details were paraphrased by the translator)), and the usage of rotation from the hips to maintain proper balance (tai sabaki). Additionally, he talked about things relating to karada (the body) and some anecdotes (such as stories about judoka such as Michigami, Isao Okano, and Nagaoka if I was hearing correctly, though I don't speak Japanese, only somewhat familiar with it), which were left untranslated or paraphrased sadly.
Emphasised details in the kata (not explanations or descriptions of how to do a technique) and my experiences (FYI Sensei mostly used the Tomiki names for the waza Tori applied)
Attacks when held

1. Ryote dori - my partner and I (both new to this kata for the most part) went in on this one and struggled as we didn't see the detail of thumb in hand for the lock (blind leading the blind, though we later worked near a kind pair after this who helped check more closely as they were experienced in the kata)
   1. Yahazu (hook shape for hand) is very important to direct uke's arm
   2. You aren't pulling the arm away to free it, you are pushing your elbow forward which pressures uke's arm
   3. Te gatana to the uto (point between uke's eyes)
   4. When applying the lock (te gatame), make sure to rotate uke's hand such that the fingers are pointing up
   5. When applying the lock, take the uke's arm in the direction perpendicular to the line made by his feet
2. Hidari eri dori - I particularly liked this one, though my uke was confused the first few times as he kept trying to apply waki gatame.
   1. Tori must grab underneath uke's hand on the lapel when stepping back
   2. When grabbing uke's hand to break the grip and apply the lock (kote hineri), tori should have his thumb in between uke's thumb and fingers, and to take the uke's arm in the direction perpendicular to the line made by his feet
   3. Uke should try to maintain jigo tai rather than lean so the lock is applied cleanly
   4. Tori's hand should not be limp when delivering the strike
3. Migi eri dori - I couldn't get kote gaeshi to work properly, will have to practice and ask my sensei about it later, same with my partner
   1. Tori should maintain a upright posture as uke pulls him forward, and use the landing of his foot to drive his hand for the uppercut to uke
   2. Tori should try to keep uke's hand attached to his centerline as he makes tai sabaki
4. Kata ude dori - My uke was very stiff, so applying the initial lock to him proved difficult, though he claims he felt it. I found this kata easy to remember as the legs go left right left right (step, step, tai sabaki, kick, then lead with the right for the lock)
   1. You are kicking with the side of the foot
   2. The step before the kick pivot around so your feet are almost parallel
   3. For waki gatame, you should be standing inside his feet, near parallel to the line perpendicular to his feet
5. Ushiro eri dori - I had experience with this one as sensei had taught during some free time a while back
   1. The parry with the arm was stated to also be the preferred way to receive punches, though take that as you will (though it is a common method in karate as well)
   2. The strike should be to the suigetsu (solar plexus)
   3. Trap uke's hand with your head so that it can't wiggle all over the place when applying the lock
6. Ushiro jime - My partner and I both had a tendency to lift the shoulder off after spinning out, will have to work on that. I will be honest, had I known this escape, I probably would have come out of an incident a few years back (before I started Judo) rather unscathed as I was jumped and then kicked on the ground by a person who was quite a pain.
   1. The attack and initial defence are identical to that of katame no kata, following which tori rotates out
   2. Keep pressure with your shoulder until your grip has been changed
7. Kakae dori - We didn't have enough mat space to finish the throw without running into other groups, but the technique is surprisingly effective. Though I couldn't initially find out how to do the armlock and had to ask my sensei about it, now it's pretty easy.
   1. Rotate the arm away from you (clockwise from your perspective) and pull uke's arm into you
   2. During the initial stomp, straighten up and raise your arms to loosen uke's grip

Attacks when at a distance - I got less time to try these in general as I wanted my partner to get a feel for them as they are a bit more complicated and he is less experienced

1. Naname uchi - this was a fun situation, it shows how a little bit of atemi can be used to setup a randori waza, and Fukushima Sensei complimented my senseis' performance saying that it was better than the current text book
   1. Te gatana is used to redirect the strike
   2. Osoto otoshi is performed
   3. Pushing the arm through is important to create the kuzushi necessary for the waza
2. Ago tsuki - I didn't actually get a chance to try this one more than once as my partner struggled with it, he kept applying a shoulder lock by pushing on the elbow without the redirect with the thumb up (shoulder is still sore)
   1. when directing uke's attack up and away, do not lean back as then you are unstable
   2. Use yahazu to direct uke's elbow toward his ear
   3. As uke will not like this use the moment after releasing the elbow lock to throw him forward in the direction perpendicular to his feet.
3. Gammen Tsuki - My partner really liked this one, I can see the uses as I've used similar entries when messing around with strikes + judo with this partner as I have a bit of karate experience
   1. Uke is meant to do a break fall, thus tori needs to get out of the way after releasing the choke
   2. Uke should realistically be aiming for where tori's uto would be if he did not evade
4. Mae Geri - this was a relatively easy one to grasp, but quite a bit of practice is needed before a full force kick can be considered
   1. Rotate ukes foot outwards so that it is not easy for him to rotate in to escape
   2. In the original, tori would lift uke's leg high but many ukes ended up injured from hitting their heads, so now tori just pushes back
5. Yoko geri - My sensei has introduced this one at the dojo before as well, though he prefaced it with about a minute of just practicing a side kick. My partner (who suffers from light knee pain) couldn't kneel during the finish
   1. The use of the te gatana to redirect the kick in the direction it is going, very similar to karates low block
   2. During the finish tori creates a void for uke to be thrown but in real life tori would throw uke onto his knee

Attacks with weapons - I understand people dislike these (reasonably in some cases), but I've found them to be useful points to explore
Attacks with a knife - Sensei Fukushima mentioned how despite my senseis making it look easy
Both my partner and I have practiced these quite a lot (I was the only one who was taught it by sensei but we practiced it on our own time), so not as many personal notes. Though I don't have a good experience so my brain switches to serious and my heart rate increases despite the fact that I know these are fake weapons.

1. Tsukkake
   1. The elbow should be pushed forward (I've actually experimented with this in the past by asking uke to try to stab me as I applied the defence, and we've found after the initial push and strike, tori is in a relatively good position, be it to run away or finish the kata)
   2. Push the locked up arm up and towards uke, then guide him to the ground
2. Choku zuki - I struggled to apply the waki gatame, I'm guessing it was control of the wrist that was the problem, this form is relatively straight forward and makes sense
   1. The strike should not be a boxer style punch, but more like the first punch in szkt
   2. uke should not go limp
   3. when moving away from uke, take him perpendicular to the line between his feet
3. Naname Zuki - Personally I think this form is cutting it close in many regards, but the control tori has is quite surprising
   1. Don't grab the blade from the sharp edge

Attacks with a jo - PSA, no matter how much you trust your uke, mistakes happen (especially with such a solid weapon) so remain vigilant to mitigate damage

1. Furi age - this was a relatively easy technique to grasp as it is an application of O soto gari setup with a palm strike to the chind
   1. Tori should enter as soon as uke begins to raise his arm, almost a preemptive entry
   2. Tori strikes at the ago (chin) with a palm strike, then places his hand on the throat for the throw
2. Furi oroshi - My partner leant into the swing and wacked me on the forehead, it could've been worse but it just grazed the outer layer as I saw the jo come closer after my initial retreat and attempted to turn out of the way. Both a PSA for tori and uke. Tori do not keep your eyes off uke, and uke please don't lean into a swing, you are horribly off balance, and you make it harder for tori to read. Also uke don't speed up when you 2 are learning (I don't know why my partner chose too...)
   1. Do not hop back onto one leg and then towards uke with the other, it leads you to have bad posture
   2. Better to make a big retreat than get hit
   3. 2 strike, one ura ken (back fist), followed by knife hand push
   4. Uke's swing should be at a diagonal
3. Morote zuki - I didn't get to practice this one as my partner was taken a bit aback after the previous incident and couldn't get the steps right for this one. Fukushima Sensei mentioned something along the lines of how a judoka was faced with a juken and couldn't figure out what to do, and thus this form was created to address that.
   1. Tori shouldn't be rowing the jo away to shake off and throw uke
   2. The arm puts pressure on uke's arm forward
   3. Tori should be trying to angle the jo down towards himself after the initial grab

Attacks with a gun - I struggled with all of these, but I think the principles are relatively sound. Though in real life, I'd most likely give up my valuables. Fukushima Sensei emphasised hip rotation in these movements, as he says that you want to direct the gun away without moving your feet, which is what uke would be seeing when looking at your pocket.
Always make sure to begin your defence after uke is clearly focused on checking your pockets, never when his focus is directly on you

1. Shomen Zuke
   1. Grab the barrel of the gun thumb up
   2. During the disarm, push the gun's muzzle to face towards him
2. Koshi Gamae - I kept getting the second hand wrong and thus the barallel was pointed towards me in the final attack, will need to work on that
   1. Grab the barrel of gun initially with the thumb down with your right hand, and push the gun so that it is horizontal after turning left, then grab the gun from below with your right
   2. make sure to not point the gun at yourself when hitting with the butt
3. Haimen Zuke - this is quite a dangerous move in theory, but also one of the more likely ones
   1. Wrap uke's arm with your arm, but make sure to direct the muzzle up with the free arm
   2. [uke] should let go of gun, as this is a hard breakfall

Overarching and repeated themes in the kata

• The use of yahazu to direct the arm rather than grips
• Keeping uke's hand connected to your centerline when applying kansetsu waza
• te gatana is a useful tool to redirect and or strike the opponent quickly
• During the gun portion, always rotate the gun off your centerline, so that even if it does fire, it doesn't penetrate too deep
• Control the gun by the muzzle
• most finishes are done by guiding uke perpendicular to the line in between his feet
• Do not directly oppose an opponents force
• Maintanence of balance at all times and moving from the hips is key
• Uke should attack meaningfully
• Action reaction is used quite a lot to first lock uke up towards his face, so that when he pushes back he is easily lead away

Overall, it was quite a good event, and I learned a lot. This kata isn't the most realistic with the attacks (though apparently a few people I know have used the ryote dori attack shockingly), but what I've learned so far is relatively sound, hopefully some time soon I can convince my partner to do some live resistance sparring with some gear on (which I have done with the knife portion with a plastic knife). Fukushima Sensei had a lot to say, as he was actively discussing his experiences and koshiki no kata after the seminar with another Japanese speaker, and I hope to be able to attend another one of his classes again someday.
Here are some videos featuring Michio Fukushima from a few years back, both where he was actively demoing, and where he had a slightly more corrective position.
https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=1253474818155243
https://youtu.be/VKgdMJS9eck?si=bGMemLfG9aquAHr1

This has been going on for months, maybe a year. I cannot lay on the right side and it's hard for me to sit down properly because of the pain in my groin. My whole body begins vibrating/ throbbing and I get a tinnitus in my right ear. It feels like the whole right side of my body is tense/ bruised, especially in the groin and hip area, lower back and flank, going up the neck and to the temple, inner corner of eye/ nose. My right shoulder is also a lot more sore than the left. It feels like someone punched me in the hip. My right knee is also extremely painful sometimes and under I'm always sore under my right foot.
I have a doctors appointment tomorrow and was hoping that someone has had this happen to them and knows what it is or how to make it better 😥

i got reddit just for this so.. it’s a bit of a long one but i got my lip pierced about 6-7 months ago. it was healing really well and fast and i wasn’t about to pay money to change my stud to a ring so i did it myself last week. i think it reacted badly (though i don’t have any metal sensitivities im aware of, nothing like this has happened to my ears or nose) and it was swelling and bruising badly. the ring wasn’t big enough to accommodate it even after a few days of me waiting for it to go down, so i just took it out until i could pick up a new one after work today (it was too sore to put my stud back in so i figured it would be okay for a day.) anyway i didn’t pick up a new ring but it wasn’t sore or bleeding or bruised anymore today so i was gonna put my stud back in but i think it healed a little TOO fast because now it feels too thick to push through myself or maybe the ring changed the direction of the hole during the week? anyway i don’t wanna risk making it worse but what should i do? do i wait for it to heal more and get it redone or get it redone now? would they even do that😭 or should i tough it out and push it back through like i normally can with my lips or nose.. please help i miss my lip ring it looked so cool

I’m not sure what to do. 3 months ago I took my indoor cat to the vet for you annual where she was completely fine and healthy. 3-4 days later she started getting these dots on her nose and the sniffles/runny nose. A couple weeks later the runny eyes. So bad that she has hair loss where her eyes run. She has to breath out of her mouth because her nose is so stuff up. Also she started developing lumps on her ears with hairless there as well. She’s not really coughing or wheezing but she frequently sneezes.
About 3 weeks later I took her into the vet and told me it was feline herpes and prescribed her lysine. The lysine didn’t change anything and once I finished that I started her on oral nose relief drops for cats, also allergy immune boost oral oil. I told my vet that she wasn’t getting any better but I didn’t want to take her in because of how much that stresses her out and it’s not going to help her recovery. Not to mention, it’s expensive as fuck for them not to do anything that will actually help. Anyways the vet told me to give her a low dose of Zyrtec. I tried that for a while and she seemed to be doing better for a week or two but now I see it getting worse again.
I don’t know what to do or how to help her. She’s miserable and I can feel her fever is back! There is no change in her food except now she doesn’t want to eat so I started giving her wet food, same formula. We moved but that was back in October, to my moms. I thought my mom’s dogs may have triggered it so I moved in with my bf. She was doing better at first but now it’s all back. She’s been in a nice big peaceful house with us so I’m not sure what is causing this, there are also no other animals or plants in the house. I’ve had her for 3 years now and she is 4. She has never had ANY of these symptoms before march. Is this even feline herpes? Do flare ups last 3 months?? Please any advice would be great. My poor baby is miserable.

I’m not sure what to do. 3 months ago I took my indoor cat to the vet for you annual where she was completely fine and healthy. 3-4 days later she started getting these dots on her nose and the sniffles/runny nose. A couple weeks later the runny eyes. So bad that she has hair loss where her eyes run. She has to breath out of her mouth because her nose is so stuff up. Also she started developing lumps on her ears with hairless there as well. She’s not really coughing or wheezing but she frequently sneezes.
About 3 weeks later I took her into the vet and told me it was feline herpes and prescribed her lysine. The lysine didn’t change anything and once I finished that I started her on oral nose relief drops for cats, also allergy immune boost oral oil. I told my vet that she wasn’t getting any better but I didn’t want to take her in because of how much that stresses her out and it’s not going to help her recovery. Not to mention, it’s expensive as fuck for them not to do anything that will actually help. Anyways the vet told me to give her a low dose of Zyrtec. I tried that for a while and she seemed to be doing better for a week or two but now I see it getting worse again.
I don’t know what to do or how to help her. She’s miserable and I can feel her fever is back! There is no change in her food except now she doesn’t want to eat so I started giving her wet food, same formula. We moved but that was back in October, to my moms. I thought my mom’s dogs may have triggered it so I moved in with my bf. She was doing better at first but now it’s all back. She’s been in a nice big peaceful house with us so I’m not sure what is causing this, there are also no other animals or plants in the house. I’ve had her for 3 years now and she is 4. She has never had ANY of these symptoms before march. Is this even feline herpes? Do flare ups last 3 months?? Please any advice would be great. My poor baby is miserable.

My child has gotten sick at 12 months old. We almost made it to one year with no illness. She has a runny nose a slight fever (being treated with Tylenol) and possibly an ear ache. Anyone know some better alternatives that I can be giving her? I’m keeping her hydrated and around a humidifier. I’m a first time mom and just want to keep my daughter healthy.🩷

I've always had trouble with my nose. Since I was young getting nose bleeds and sinus infection, ear infections. I've seen several ent and now finally an allergist who noticed my nose is deviated.
Shes sending me to an ent to see about surgery or what else they can do. I always have mucus in the back of my throat, can't cough it up, I sound nasally, nosebleeds so much especially during winter the last ent just caterisized and sent me -_- they can last up to 20 mins, sometimes I have a hard time breathing and doing meditation is really difficult I cant bring a full breath through my nose.
I've been to so many specialist and no one noticed. My thyroid doctor thought it was sleep apnea and I've also been told gerd which I have none of. I'm hoping this ent can finally solve this because I'm tired of it.
Edit: my allergist also found a bunch of chemical allergies like linaloo, lemone, balsam of peru, fragrance mixes so I'm not sure if this is making it worse too.

Sorry, big vent incoming. Just want to get it out somewhere.
Our house got the stomach bug last week. My daughter picked it up at a local mom get together (why do you go to those if you are/were just sick??? UGH) So it was 5 days of me, my husband and my toddler girl being sick with all the gross stuff. Luckily my husband and I got over the stomach things, but the diarrhea is lingering in my toddler (to my understanding this is relatively normal, but it still makes me anxious).
I hated those 5 days. I felt like crap, I felt bad for my sweet husband who felt like even worse crap and I still feel so bad for my little baby girl who is still dealing with stuff.
And just when my gut started feeling better I picked up a sore throat which luckily wasn’t strep, doc thought it was just something viral, but that quickly turned into laryngitis and now I’ve lost my voice and my nose is starting to get stuffed and I’m worried I have a sinus infection coming on. And oh yeah I’m 20 weeks pregnant 😭 (don’t worry I’ve been in touch with my medical provider this whole time and baby isn’t in any danger, it’s just a little icing on this cake of discomfort). And I’m only three days into this nose/throat thing, and it could easily last another week.
I just hate losing more sleep than I already am due to not being able to breathe + throat pain. I hate that I can’t communicate with my daughter or my husband. I hate not being able to swallow without pain. I hate that I feel like crap.
I realize I have a LOT to be thankful for, I just want to be back to my normal so I can be a happiebetter mom and wife.
So yeah, being sick with a sick toddler is definitely top 3 least favorite part about parenthood. It might take spot number one but I’m saving that for something worse that may come along 🙃

I was with a guy until december, which was our last contact. Did not interact in any way with another man until about last month. He eventually got sick about a week and a half after we first kissed. He says he knows his body and he never “gets sick like this”. He has a spot in his throat which lead him to believe it was mono, but tested negative. He now things it could be chlamydia? The issue is, I have not had any symptoms other than a sore throat for 2 days, and then a few weeks later, a cough and stuffy nose. I get sick very often as I suspect I have had something wrong with my immune system my whole life. Is chlamydia even likely in this case? I only did oral with the guy in December, and have only kissed the current guy.