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A safe space for Indian Women

2016.05.03 06:14 indiangrill92 A safe space for Indian Women

Welcome to TwoXIndia, (TwoxChromosomes meets India). A safe community to discuss and share both serious and silly content - for and about Indian women. This is a space for Women/nb . Men are not allowed to post or comment. See sub rules and FAQ
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2013.10.25 14:59 grumpycateight Talking about older women/younger men relationships

READ THE FAQ & RULES BEFORE POSTING OR COMMENTING! A safe space to trade experiences, frustrations, worries, analyze cultural reactions, or just chat with fellow cougars and cubs. Working definition: a cougacub relationship is one where the woman (cougar) is a woman of 40 who at least 10 years older than the man (cub) or woman (kitten). A woman under 40 is a Puma.
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2015.06.08 03:50 Jozarin Be the men's issues conversation you want to see in the world.

The men's issues discussion has been sorely held back by counterproductive tribalism. We're building a new dialogue on the real issues facing men through positivity, inclusiveness, and solutions-building.
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2024.05.16 11:00 Astor_Yuri The Power Moves (long review)

Long story short:
* Like everyone else, I had doubts before purchasing any of his courses, so I’ll mention the main points that were important to me before buying it (more on this when I talk about the four main problems I faced in my journey of self-development and attraction):
* Is the course worth it? Considering the impact it has had on my life, my answer is a resounding YES.
* Is there a cost-benefit balance? Absolutely yes.
* Will it help me in all areas of my life? Yes, especially with power dynamics. This course will offer you valuable insights that you can apply in any area of your life.
* Do the techniques and strategies really work? Yes, they do. However, like any course, the key is to you apply what you've learned and it also depends on the time and effort you're willing to invest to achieve lasting changes
Important note: I don't have any kind of relationship with Lucio or anyone on his team, and no one paid me to do this review, much less to share such intimate details. I am doing this of my own free will because I want to thank him for all the knowledge he has provided me, and I believe this could be useful for him and for anyone looking to determine whether what he teaches is useful or not. This review is not going to be directly about his courses; it is going to be about all the resources on TPM (The Power Moves), and specifically about the impact they have had on my life. Consider it more of a testimonial and also a personal opinion.
The following review is quite detailed, and really long. I really believe that writing less would strip away a lot of depth and context. I don’t expect everyone to read it entirely, but maybe it can offer some perspective to someone interested in buying the course. I’m not a special person (I mean like someone famous, or with a lot of academic titles, or any of that); I’m just a regular guy looking to improve the quality of my life and achieve enough economic prosperity to help the people I love most live the life they want, help those in need, people, animals…and if possible, gain valuable knowledge that helps me in my work as a psychologist. Nothing satisfies me more than seeing the faces of people when, with some time and effort, they realize they can do things they never thought possible and feel proud of themselves for achieving it. I also haven’t had it easy in my romantic life, and I’d like to find a healthy person who is also motivated to be a better human being and have a peaceful love. Learning about power will just be a means to contribute my little bit to this world. I’m not a writer, but I’ll try to outline what I consider to be the most important points to give you another perspective to consider, if you want to buy this course. My native language is Spanish, so due to the length of the text and my lack of skill in “speaking” another language, I decided to use ChatGPT as a translator (since I feel it does a better job than Google Translator), and I’ll make the necessary adjustments to make myself better understood.
For most of my life, I lived in deep loneliness and experienced a lot of abuse from people. I never understood why, no matter how many good things I did for others, I received mistreatment in return. My social programming whispered to me, “Do good things for others, and they will be good to you”, “Give to others what you would like to receive,” among many other things. But as time went by, I slowly fell into despair. Since I was 8 years old, I’ve had suicidal thoughts, strongly influenced by my social/romantic life. Eventually, I began to harbor unhealthy beliefs that took root in my way of thinking. For example, I thought I had to make enormous efforts to maintain the “affection” and “acceptance” people “had” for me. I also believed that if no one, not a single person, treated me with respect, it was because that was what I deserved. If no one was interested in who I was, it was because I was worth so little that I couldn’t ask for more from life and should be grateful for the crumbs of “love” I received. Regarding my love life, during my first 19 years, not a single person showed interest in me. I’m not extremely attractive, but based on social feedback, I’d say I’m slightly above average. Perhaps my short height would be the one physical trait that works against me, as I’m 1.63 meters or, as you might better understand, I’m 5’4”. As for internal traits related to girls, I treated them well, was respectful, showed interest in them, helped them, dedicated a lot of my time, and was unconditionally there for them through good and bad times. I was many things that, according to movies and the opinions of many girls (based solely on what they said they wanted), I thought would bring me plenty of women, and yet, not a single soul wanted to be with me. What I did achieve with the girls I liked was becoming their best friend. And so, I spent my days and nights listening to the girls I liked cry over aggressive men who mistreated them physically and emotionally and/or cheated on them with other girls. I didn’t understand it; I had a good set of values and not just with them but with everyone. I considered myself a good guy, competent in some areas, and was unconditionally there for them, and yet they preferred to be with clearly violent men. In one of the moments when I felt most miserable, the following happened: I liked a girl and expressed it to her, and although she initially reciprocated, a month later, she left me for someone else and started dating that person. In something very similar to therapy, I ended up helping her for almost three years to improve her relationship with her aggressive partner.
Here, I’d like to say something (nothing to do with the situation, but anyway, I wanted to share those thoughts with you): two of the worst things I was made to believe were: “You don’t have to change; someone will come and love you just as you are,” and “Romantic love is something that just happens naturally, stop looking for it. It will come to you.” Neither of these things ever happened, and both are awful, unempathetic and limiting mindsets.
Eight years ago, after spending some time in a psychiatric hospital due to suicidal ideation, I decided to completely change my life and committed to my personal growth. Every day without exception, I studied and applied the concepts I was learning in my spare time, while studying to one day become a psychologist. I bought books, courses (even from very prominent figures in the world of seduction and self-development that you would easily recognize). When I didn’t even have money to eat, I downloaded them from pirate sources, but I always found a way to keep progressing. I had many virtual teachers who helped me grow in different aspects, and I’m very grateful for the knowledge they provided me that helped me climb out of that black hole. Like many who embark on this journey, I reached a point where, no matter how much I read and took courses, there was nothing new to pull me out of my stagnation. Everything was the same. I had to constantly review new resources and listen to endless hours of videos to find a needle in a haystack. For me, it was no longer worth paying for a full course if what I was going to found was something I had likely already learned (a lot of times for free). Although I sought to develop on all levels, here I will emphasize the romantic part more. Generally, these learning resources had a couple of problems: the first is that I’ve never been the kind of person who wants to date multiple girls; I’m more the type of guy who seeks a stable partner. The second problem was that many people who teach dating skills ask you to have a very high energy level and I’m a very calm and rather introverted person (not shy, introverted). I don’t want to pretend to be excited or become friends with everyone around me to increase my social value (it’s very exhausting and not worth it as a long-term strategy). The third problem is that the advice of many people who want to promote healthy relationships (some of them psychologists), although well-intentioned, makes any spark that generated attraction nonexistent, generating very predictable behavior (in the bad way) among other things. – certainly, those tools are important for a healthy relationship, but they won’t necessarily make someone feel attracted to you (I find it unlikely). They are more of a positive complement that can help increase value when there is already attraction. After a while and thanks to Lucio’s reflections, I realized the problems and limitations that these gurus or psychologists, basically they are very “politically correct”. Finally, the last problem I found is that none of them addressed the true root of my problem. No matter how much I improved in all aspects, I still didn’t see results with girls. Yes, the number of girls approaching me increased slightly, but none wanted to be with me for a long-term relationship. That missing ingredient is called “power,” and although briefly mentioned in those courses, videos, books, etc., it was never sufficiently well explained to understand why I wasn’t achieving results. My problem was that my balance between warmth and power was enormously unbalanced. I was completely warm with people, but I didn’t have a clue about power dynamics (what Lucio would call “The King’s Servant). I ended up in the “good guy” category, a good guy who wanted to be bad and wanted to treat women poorly to see if he got results, but whose moral values never allowed him to do anything that would hurt or could hurt another person, even if it meant remaining alone (which, far from making me feel good or proud at the moment, it only increased my self-hate). I wanted to remain good, but being good got me nowhere. Adding to that, due to my upbringing, I developed an anxious attachment style (something I also hated for a long time because, objectively speaking, it’s certainly easier for an avoidant man to have more power in a relationship thanks to his natural tendency to fear emotional closeness and natural behavior to protect his independence; quick note: I think that behavior is far from perfect but from what I’ve seen at least they get more results with girls). I have been always considered too clingy and dependent.
Many girls who felt initial attraction to me after a while wanted me to stay in their lives, but never as their partner, only as a good friend. When I turned 20, I found my first partner. This girl was incredibly attracted to me at first, but as soon as I started prioritizing her and seeking closeness, when I set aside my power to be “truly myself,” she began to lose attraction and started to disrespect me. At some point along that path, I came across TPM, and I must say it was a pleasant surprise after years of stagnation.
Human beings are very complex, and because of this, it’s unlikely that a single teacher will “save” you from your social and/or romantic situation. But for me, the person who has influenced my life for the better the most is Lucio. Since I started this journey, I’ve been gathering bits of knowledge from each person that has contributed to who I am, but there have been two things that have totally changed my social life, and for me, both are equally important. The first would take a long time to explain and is more about inner work and pure reflection, but in terms of knowledge, if I had to erase those eight years and start over, I’d like it to be with the knowledge Lucio provides. Seduction University was the last course I bought a long time ago, and Power University will probably be the last course I’ll buy (for several years). I bought Seduction University quite some time ago (about two or three years) and am still learning; I’m just over 73% through the course. This amount of time might surprise many, but those who seek lasting changes in themselves and who are truly committed to deeply learning and integrating everything there until it becomes second nature, know it will likely take several months and probably years.
Having knowledge is not a magic cure; knowing something doesn't make you good at it. Changing deep aspects of one's identity is not as easy as many people seem to forget; it's slow, very slow, and also requires conscious and constant effort. The path of personal growth is not easy, but personally I don't expect it to be. It may take me several years of practice to consolidate all that knowledge, but I know with absolute certainty that it will be a great investment for my future. Going back to the main point, in my opinion, Seduction University and very likely Power University will give you much more value than what you'd get from a more well-known person's course, and at an incredibly affordable price. I know this, because I've been consuming content from many authors for 8 years (every day, each day of the past 8 years without fail). Honestly, I'm fortunate that it is priced so affordably. To be completely honest with you I don't earn much money, and, in my country, there is not much economic prosperity, there is significant inequality, and for me, paying for a course in dollars is comparatively much more expensive than for people who earn in dollars or other stronger currencies. And still, I believe it's totally worth investing in these courses.
One important thing I've learned over the years is that there are things your mind will not be ready to understand, and the good thing about that is as long as you commit to your learning, you will keep growing and progressing, and at some point when you revisit the material, you might understand those things you didn't “grasp” initially, or you might achieve more advanced things that your novice self couldn't properly do the first time you went through the material. You'll pay a price for one of these courses the day you decide to buy it (if you decide to do so), but the truth is that by the time you truly learn everything, so much time will have passed that, if you look at it from a very distant perspective (all the required time for you to really learn), you'll find that the benefits you will get will be arguably greater than those that Lucio and his team will have gotten. Another thing to keep in mind is that either Seduction University or Power University, if used well, will likely help you achieve more economic prosperity; on the other hand, Lucio makes sure to improve the course content, which guarantees even more growth over time. For me this justifies the annual payment to access the material again, which brings me to the next point: Lucio gives you a full year to access the learning material, and if you want to keep having access, he significantly reduces the price (probably in gratitude to those who trusted him and decided to buy the course). Also, keep in mind what I said about how it's very likely that the second or third time you take the course, you'll probably learn new things you were not prepared for before. Finally, it's a price that, in my opinion, supports all his work. He has spent a lot of time and effort reading books, articles, reviewing courses, making videos, writing in his blog, and much more, all for free. Even if you decided not to buy any of his courses, believe me, just by reading his articles, watching his videos, and reading the book reviews he recommends for specific issues, you'd already be avoiding wasting time on reading useless or unnecessarily complex things. For my part, I'm glad he was able to provide me with a way out of the stagnation I had; I really like that he also considers people who are looking for a stable relationship and not just those seeking to have more sexual partners (which is also very valid and respectable); I like that he teaches the "general rules and mindsets," allowing for personality flexibility since that way I don't feel compelled to be (or rather pretend to be) a very energetic and super sociable person to achieve good results with girls; I like that he is a person who does not seek or promote the use of the knowledge he has to harm people but focuses on teaching how to generate relationships that promote a win-win dynamic. Since I started to consume his content, my life has changed quite a bit. I definitely feel more respected, and all my relationships have improved on all levels, romantically, although I have not yet found a person with whom there has been enough compatibility to want to have that person as a stable partner, and I still have much to improve, I definitely feel that I have become more attractive to people. In my last job, considering there weren't many staff members (about 30-35 workers including supervisors and the manager), I ended up being (romantically/sexually) liked by 14 people (8 women, 6 men), and in that job, I dated my second partner. I still make many mistakes, and there are deeper issues that require professional help, but the truth is that my life has undoubtedly improved a lot. I am a person who really takes the time to learn and truly integrate into myself what I have learned, and it has taken me years to consolidate the knowledge in Seduction University. As I said before, I haven't finished it, and it will probably take me many more months (maybe years) to consolidate the information there and what I still have not read yet in the course (not to mention the hyperlinks he provides to dig really deep in some topics). I want to improve even more in my life, and that’s why I decided to buy Power University. From lesson one, I already started finding very valuable knowledge; I haven't gone far into the course, and it would be dishonest to give my opinion, but I feel that, like Seduction University, Power University will also be very worthwhile. The book "Ultimate Power" also has hidden gems (at the moment, I am reflecting a lot on what it explains about cultivating an antifragile ego). I decided not to buy more courses or books because it will probably take me more than a year to consume all the content and much longer to make it my second nature. Although I like to diversify my knowledge and will continue learning about synergistic topics about personal growth, I would like to prioritize finishing both courses (at least "the reading part" the "superficial effort part"), besides dedicating the rest of my efforts to deep-reflective inner work, developing a physique that I feel happy with, and creating my own business that will allow me to help more people and animals in the future.
I hope the knowledge you find in any of TPM’s resources changes your life as much as it changed mine. Of course, it’s important to learn from different people and not become obsessed with a single philosophy. There are things you won’t find in Lucio’s material that could be very useful in your life and your specific problems/challenges, and you shouldn’t overlook them. Additionally, learning from different people with different perspectives will help you be more flexible and have a better chance of achieving the things you want in life. Find someone who shares their knowledge with you and who makes you reflect, and when you notice that that person starts repeating ideas, it's time to move on and look for new people who can help you out of your stagnation. Remember, every piece is important along the way, and it's important to be grateful to every person you meet because everyone has a valuable lesson to teach you (especially when that person has a different perspective than yours).
I'll probably spend many more years learning from Lucio until I finish integrating the knowledge he offers (although as he will most likely keep adding more content and learning things on his own, I will surely visit his blog or YouTube channel from time to time like visiting an old and dear friend and teacher whom I admire and respect).
I would like to make a final mention to John from customer service. He is a charming person and attended to me very well every time I contacted customer service. It feels like talking to a good friend; the service is fast, he is respectful, he has manners, and from start to finish he was very attentive in keeping his word every time he told me he would respond within a certain time frame. You can't really get to know a person in customer service, but from all the times I talked to him, he seemed competent, warm, and generous. John deserves a raise; he’s a really great guy :)

submitted by Astor_Yuri to CoursesReviews [link] [comments]


2024.05.16 10:55 pisarv1234 NabhRakshak: The Versatile Drone Revolutionizing Industries

In an era defined by technological innovation, drones have emerged as powerful tools with transformative potential across various industries. Among these, Drone Nabhrakshak by Pisarv Technologies stands out as a versatile and advanced drone solution, redefining the way organizations approach surveillance, education, agriculture, defense, and beyond. With its cutting-edge technology, intuitive design, and unparalleled capabilities, NabhRakshak is poised to revolutionize industries across the board.
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submitted by pisarv1234 to u/pisarv1234 [link] [comments]


2024.05.16 10:48 alex32655 Should I agree to be introduced to grandson?

Long story short, I’m 26 and the grandson is 34. I never thought about going for someone with that big of an age gap, but I’ve thought about how is just a number, especially when you approach your later 20s. And as I get older, 30 and 35 don’t seem as old as I thought they were. I’m not opposed to being introduced to someone that I know mutually through someone else, but here’s the tricky part of it: his grandmother is also my patient. And at first I didn’t think she was being serious, and so I kindly declined. But as the days went on, she continued to bring it up. And part of me didn’t see it as a big deal, but I don’t exactly have guys lining up for me. But I also took it as a compliment, that she holds me to such high regard, to want me to even meet her grandson. I’ve been told I don’t put myself out there, but is anyone ever perfectly okay with potentially making a fool of themself trying to meet someone organically? Anyway, back to the grandson….normally if it was neighbor trying to set me up with their grandson, I’d be less hesitant, but since it involves a patient’s family member, I feel like major ethical concerns come into play. But also idk if he’s even agreed to do it either. Because at first I said no, but now I feel like I’m shooting my shot but not taking her up on her offer. And call me crazy, but what if I’m stepping in the way of meeting my dare you say…soulmate? Because this grandma (love her dearly, I’m actually quite close with her) is 94, so she knows a thing or two, especially with how well she knows her grandson. And she said I’m just his type. And I know she talks about both of us to one another, she’s literally trying to set us up. And like I said, I’m not sure if he agreed to meeting me. But through all the thoughts I’ve had, I keep coming back to how hard it is to meet someone nowadays, and how sometimes being set up actually works out. My parents started dating by my mom asking a mutual friend of her’s and my dad, if he wanted to go to a party with her. He agreed and after that party, they started dating. So they were age 16 and they’re 59 now, so you do the math. In the few weeks of this going on, the times he’s been visiting her, I’m always busy at that same time with other patients, so we end up missing each other. And I hope she didn’t tell him that I’m hiding, because I’m literally not hiding…except one time when I could hear her calling out about me from down the hall “there she is!”. I felt so awkward being singled out like that, I literally walked into a random room, not thinking they would be coming down the hall and passing me in the room. FML. And as they passed by the room, she shouted “there she is!” again FML 😭 I’m also not trying to come off desperate if I agree to meet him, but what if he wasn’t even on board to begin with. And then I just look Iike fool who agreed to meet him, even though I’m caring for his grandmother. Is that cringe? Men: what should I do? Would you agree if you were the grandson? Women: feel free to chime in as well.
submitted by alex32655 to Advice [link] [comments]


2024.05.16 10:47 alex32655 Is it cringe to agree to be introduced to grandson?

Long story short, I’m 26 and the grandson is 34. I never thought about going for someone with that big of an age gap, but I’ve thought about how is just a number, especially when you approach your later 20s. And as I get older, 30 and 35 don’t seem as old as I thought they were. I’m not opposed to being introduced to someone that I know mutually through someone else, but here’s the tricky part of it: his grandmother is also my patient. And at first I didn’t think she was being serious, and so I kindly declined. But as the days went on, she continued to bring it up. And part of me didn’t see it as a big deal, but I don’t exactly have guys lining up for me. But I also took it as a compliment, that she holds me to such high regard, to want me to even meet her grandson. I’ve been told I don’t put myself out there, but is anyone ever perfectly okay with potentially making a fool of themself trying to meet someone organically? Anyway, back to the grandson….normally if it was neighbor trying to set me up with their grandson, I’d be less hesitant, but since it involves a patient’s family member, I feel like major ethical concerns come into play. But also idk if he’s even agreed to do it either. Because at first I said no, but now I feel like I’m shooting my shot but not taking her up on her offer. And call me crazy, but what if I’m stepping in the way of meeting my dare you say…soulmate? Because this grandma (love her dearly, I’m actually quite close with her) is 94, so she knows a thing or two, especially with how well she knows her grandson. And she said I’m just his type. And I know she talks about both of us to one another, she’s literally trying to set us up. And like I said, I’m not sure if he agreed to meeting me. But through all the thoughts I’ve had, I keep coming back to how hard it is to meet someone nowadays, and how sometimes being set up actually works out. My parents started dating by my mom asking a mutual friend of her’s and my dad, if he wanted to go to a party with her. He agreed and after that party, they started dating. So they were age 16 and they’re 59 now, so you do the math. In the few weeks of this going on, the times he’s been visiting her, I’m always busy at that same time with other patients, so we end up missing each other. And I hope she didn’t tell him that I’m hiding, because I’m literally not hiding…except one time when I could hear her calling out about me from down the hall “there she is!”. I felt so awkward being singled out like that, I literally walked into a random room, not thinking they would be coming down the hall and passing me in the room. FML. And as they passed by the room, she shouted “there she is!” again FML 😭 I’m also not trying to come off desperate if I agree to meet him, but what if he wasn’t even on board to begin with. And then I just look Iike fool who agreed to meet him, even though I’m caring for his grandmother. Is that cringe? Men: what should I do? Would you agree if you were the grandson? Women are free to chime in as well.
submitted by alex32655 to nursing [link] [comments]


2024.05.16 10:43 Akash-Ball_Bits The Exciting ins and outs of Women’s T20 Cricket

Women’s T20 cricket has become a thrilling and popular sport worldwide. One of the most awaited events in women’s cricket is the Women’s T20 World Cup. This tournament brings together teams from different countries to compete in exciting, exciting matches.

The Rise of Women’s Cricket

In recent years, women’s cricket has gained significant attention and recognition. More and more girls and women are taking up the sport, encouraged by the success of players like Mithali Raj, Ellyse Perry, and Meg Lanning. Women’s cricket has evolved from a niche sport to a global phenomenon, with increased investment, media coverage, and fan engagement.

The Significance of the Women’s T20 World Cup

The Women’s T20 World Cup is a pinnacle event in women’s cricket, showcasing the talent and skill of female cricketers worldwide. It provides a platform for players to compete at the highest level and for fans to witness exciting and competitive matches. The tournament not only promotes gender equality in sports but also inspires young girls to pursue their dreams in cricket.

Host Countries and Venues

Each Women’s T20 World Cup edition is hosted by different countries, adding to the tournament’s diversity and excitement. Host countries invest in modern facilities and ensure the matches are held in a safe and welcoming environment for players and spectators. The first T-20 World Cup was hosted by England. The upcoming women’s T-20 World Cup will be hosted by Bangladesh. For the upcoming U-19 women’s T-20 world Cup, Malaysia is hosting in 2025. From iconic stadiums to picturesque grounds, the Women’s T20 World Cup venues offer a unique backdrop for the matches.

Format and Teams

The Women’s T20 World Cup features a format similar to the men’s tournament, with teams competing in group-stage matches followed by knockout rounds. The participating teams include powerhouse nations like Australia, England, India, and New Zealand and emerging cricketing nations eager to make their mark on the global stage. The tournament allows players to showcase their talent and teams to test their skills against top opposition.

Impact on Women’s Cricket

The Women’s T20 World Cup has had a transformative impact on women’s cricket, elevating the sport to new heights of popularity and success. The tournament has increased investment in women’s cricket infrastructure, player development programs, and grassroots initiatives. It has also inspired more girls and women to take up cricket, breaking down barriers and challenging stereotypes.

Memorable Moments

Over the years, the Women’s T20 World Cup has produced numerous memorable moments and iconic performances. From last-ball thrillers to record-breaking innings, the tournament never fails to captivate audiences and leave a lasting impression. Whether it’s a stunning catch, a match-winning century, or a nail-biting finish, the Women’s T20 World Cup always delivers moments of pure excitement and drama.

Conclusion

The Women’s T20 World Cup celebrates talent, teamwork, and determination, showcasing the best of women’s cricket globally. As the sport continues to grow and evolve, the tournament will remain a highlight on the cricketing calendar, inspiring generations of female cricketers and fans worldwide.
submitted by Akash-Ball_Bits to IndiaCricket [link] [comments]


2024.05.16 10:34 NeverBeenRung I went on a real date with a much older man and it revealed something about myself:

I (F20) grew up with an incredibly attentive father. I have him on speed dial on my phone. I love him more than most of the women my age can comprehend. I respect him, and I obey when he tells me I am in the wrong. More than that, I have a mother who doubts upon me just as well as he does. I revere her word more than anyone else. And yeah, here I am, still desperate to feel taken care of.
All things considered, it was actually the best date I’ve ever been on. I related super easy easily with him, we both exist with similar industries. He ends up looking incredible, I clocked him seven years younger than he is. But that doesn’t change the gap and doesn’t change what I’ve learned:
I am deeply tired. I have reached a level of burnout that is past the other cycles of burnout that I have been in. And because of this “deep tired“ I am desperate for comfort, and stability. I don’t know if you know anything about men in their early 20s, but typically they are very bad at providing comfort and they’re not in a place in life where they can provide stability.
I just want someone who’s going to be there and be reliable and through my experiences in the experiences of my friends… Over and over again, I am worried that I will never find that person. So forgive me for looking above my age bracket - I can’t help it.
I wish I could be enthralled or excited or turned on by these 20-year-olds… But I’m just not. I want to be done. I am tired of going on dates, I am tired of searching, I amtired of vetting, and I am tired of being told to wait.
I realize that I am 20 and therefore I am a baby to most of you… But anything that feels like rest… I cannot stop myself from reaching towards it. And if that means a brief foolish soirée with an over gentleman… I think that I am allowed that.
submitted by NeverBeenRung to confessions [link] [comments]


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submitted by MDDoctorTutors to CollegeTutors [link] [comments]


2024.05.16 10:17 Born_Software 20 M bi from India looking for older white and/or Latino/Hispanic bros (21+) from Europe or North America to share things with. [Please read post]

Hello big bros! I'm a 20 year old bisexual guy from Kolkata (Calcutta), India (GMT+5:30) who's looking for an older white or Latino/Hispanic bro (21+). Physically, I'm 167 cm (5'6"), 65kg (130lbs) with light brown skin, medium brown eyes and very dark brown hair which reaches my shoulders. As a child, I mostly grew up with women and never had the chance to form close bonds with men, either older or amongst my peers, as we had markedly different interests and also because I was teased for my seemingly effeminate behaviour, which I have now learned to embrace.
All of this has eventually culminated into a distrust of men, especially those who are South Asian, as in my experience they are extremely insecure about their masculinity and sexuality, either straight or queer. But I want to change that, I'm looking for people I can share everything with, whom I can trust, whom I can be intimate and vulnerable with, whatever context that maybe in. I also suffer from clinical depression, Borderline Personality Disorder and Generalised Anxiety Disorder, have been on medication for the past 5 years and am going to therapy, but if that's not okay with you, I completely understand and do not blame you. That being said, I'm open minded and am comfortable with anything at all once we know each other. I just want someone to be a reassuring figure whom I can lean upon and trust with my whole heart. With whom I can talk about anything, without any limitations or judgements, about my curiosities about different things that I didn't have anyone to tell me about in my adolescence and am still figuring out on my own.
So if these sound good to you, please don't hesitate to reach out. Please be open to sharing face pics as I am too. If we get along well we can move to some other messaging app like Discord or something else where we can chat, share voice notes and eventually have voice and video calls. DMs are always open, looking forward to hearing from all of you!
P.S.: I DO NOT use SNAPCHAT or SKYPE or other apps of that kind due to concerns about privacy as well as safety and encryption. Hope you understand.
submitted by Born_Software to NextBestBro [link] [comments]


2024.05.16 10:08 Slow-llama Am I being financially abused?

TLDR; friend believes I’m being financially abused and should reach out for help. I’m unsure if that’s actually the case. Not really sure how to tell.
Context - I had been living with my ex for almost two years, above the pub/restaurant he was the manager of. Due to living there, the only thing we HAD to pay was council tax. Any other bills were what we wanted (car finance, phone bill, Netflix etc). I took this opportunity to go back to college for a year, and work two days a week. Working two days a week was enough to cover my bills, and my ex said he would pay the council tax, which was reduced by 25% due to me being a student. This is a long story.
The situation - £5,000 went missing from the pub. Apparently the bag split when it was picked up and taken to the bank (a company comes to do this). While the money was being recovered, my ex had to cover £5,000 until it was all accounted for, as apparently it was in his contract. He came to me asking to borrow £3,000 as he didn’t have enough to cover it all. I reluctant lent it to him, and got it in writing that regardless of the outcome, he would give me the £3,000 back. The money was never recovered.
At this time we were about to go abroad on holiday. The £2,000 he had to give to the pub was meant to pay for the rest of the holiday (deposit paid). He convinced me that they would get the money back and if I paid for the holiday, he would then cover what he owed for the holiday. Stupidly I agreed and paid the £2,000. AFTER I had paid and came back from holiday, he then explained to me he had absolutely no money now until payday (few weeks away). He couldn’t even buy food for his child when she stayed with us, which is something I then also covered. This was August time.
In November, we were due to take his daughter to Disney, he told me a week before we were going that we were driving. Up until this point, I was told we were flying and flights were booked. I told him we cannot drive to Disney as he has over £1,000 worth of working needing doing to his car, low break fluid, an engine malfunction, worn tyres and it was just too dangerous to even drive his child there. His daughter knew about Disney and it had already been rearranged several times. So I told him I can lend him money to take her and hire a car to drive. He agreed. During the same conversation I told him to get his banking up so we can work out where all his money is going, considering he earned over £2000 a month, had barely any outgoings, yet was always poor. He was very reluctant but finally did. Turns out he was spending a lot of money on only fans. Obviously I was devastated and didn’t lend him money for Disney.
Two days later, I received a letter stating council tax hadn’t been paid for the entire year. I then found out he has a CCJ (county court judgement) and due to this, the council sent bailiffs after me as my name was also on the council tax, and they didn’t see any point in going after him as he already had debt. This was another £1,500 (to cover the council tax and bailiff company fees).
Please don’t ask why I didn’t leave at this point, I’m kicking myself for not doing so.
In January, he had another disciplinary (first being the missing money) and lost his job. I won’t even attempt to explain what happened, I still have no idea. Regardless, we had less four weeks for him to find a new job and find us somewhere to live. He did apply for jobs, and started one about 5 weeks later. As for somewhere to live however, I ended up having to do it while working and studying for my exam, while he spent most of the time gaming until 4am, leaving me to sort out everything. It was all very last minute but I managed to find us a house, big enough for us, his child and for him to have a man cave/office. Due to the CCJ, he wasn’t accepted unless his parents were guarantors.
I told him I want no bills in my name (apart from the rent), so if he misses payments, then i want it to be his issue. Come to getting WiFi - he couldn’t because of the CCJ. He came up to me, with the WiFi person on the phone, telling me to give my consent to have it in my name. I asked him if we could have a chat about it first. He told me that the guy is on the phone ready, right now, to get it all set up, and that if I didn’t do this, then I wouldn’t have internet to study for my exam. Due to me being autistic, I heard that, panicked and agreed. Stupid, I know.
He decided to start doing Amazon flex (deliveries for Amazon), and he told me that what he made off that, he would give to me (I haven’t seen a penny). He called me one day saying he can’t get onto his monzo app to send himself money, so I had to send him money for petrol for him to do deliveries. For the first time, I said no. He told me that if I didn’t, then he couldn’t work and get paid to give me money. I still said no and told him to ask his mum. He then didn’t work.
He admitted to me in message that he was reluctant to pay me back in case I ended the relationship. I then decided to end the relationship anyway and am having to live with him until the lease is up in August. We came to an agreement that instead of me paying my half of the rent/bills, he would cover it and I would take that amount off of what he owes me.
Rent is meant to come out of his account each month, but I’ve been receiving emails and texts stating the rent hasn’t been paid. He keeps telling me it’s an issue due to the reference number and that it’s sorted. I had another email yesterday saying we’re 14 days over due on rent. I called the estate agents and they said it still hasn’t been paid. Ex is telling me it has been paid, I’ve asked him to show me on his banking app that the transaction has gone out. He is flat out refusing saying what he does with his money is not my business. I’ve tried explaining that he owes me a few thousand pound and that the rent payment is my business.
I’ve had a friend tell me that this is financial abuse and that I need to seek help before things escalate. The only time things got physical was when I had his phone trying to budget and came across the only fans payment. He tried to grab his phone off me, but I moved as I tried to see how far back the payments go, and I ended up being pushed to the floor (he’s 6foot 6inches and I’m 5foot 4inches for context). He’s very good at gaslighting and manipulating me. Am I being dumb or is this financial abuse?
Sorry for this being all over the place.
submitted by Slow-llama to JustNoSO [link] [comments]


2024.05.16 10:07 Thin_Crazy_3685 SheraSeven notes

Someone here about a month ago asked for a summary or notes on Sheras teachings and I cant seem to find it anymore, so I will list here some of the things I have noted.
• Have a goal in mind
• Stay feminine
• Dont talk about your personal business, family/exes/private personal life heavy on the exes!
• if he tries to have sex immediately and he’s all sex sex sex just tell them ”Okay maybe this isn’t going to work out, but I have the perfect friend for you who likes your type. Her name is Alexa, I’ll send her number to you. She is soo free spirited” or just blatantly ask for money if he’s that rude.
• if he asks for your body count, ask about his bank account (only dusties ask this)
• He needs to like you more than you like him
• Spend his money
• Allow him to cheat, dont try to control any man
• All men are the same, their income isn’t
• Whatever comes out of a mans mouth, reverse it
• If you want him to love you, love yourself not him
• Men want what they cant have
• Emotions and fighting. Treat him like your boss in that sense, you dont get messy with your boss either.
• Emotions are better if you act them
• Laugh at his jokes
• Let him do the talking, and dont correct him. You want to make him feel good about himself around you.
• Tell them you dont have sex outside of relationships
• Exculisivity costs money, you’re not 3rd graders with post-it cards asking to be their girlfriend.
• If they say something you dont like give them an ugly look
• If he doesnt fix his issues within a week he’s a dusty. (E.g car breaks down etc.)
• ”I don’t deal with men who cant keep their word and are secretly broke”
• Dusties run away on their own if given a financial burden
• Always have a financial problem as a reason why you havent texted back or are unable to see them.
• Don’t be too available
• I look for what a man can do for me, offer me. I make him feel good, and elevate him
• When he makes time for you, you make time for him. And make sure that your time is being compensated, wheter it’s experience or material, or money
• Have several options
• It’s all about him stroke his ego
• You are the prize !!!!
• Ask him for help for free stuff first then he doesn’t have a problem with problems that cost
• Pay attention to details and make mental notes about him
• Dont sleep on the first date
• You cant change a dusty, a dusty will change themselves
• Be their weakness
• Say ”I’m very attracted to you” to ugly men
• Be emotionally reclusive
• Let him pick the place for the date but know in advance so you can ghost if it’s a cheap coffee shop
• Believe the red flags
• Talk slow and sensual
• Act like you dont need him at all
• Only being sexual, giving sex, talking about sex, initiating sex is being a pickmeisha. Use your other assets, such as voice, eyes, body language, humor, appearance
• If you want to be a pickmeisha, be one to a bank account
• Confidence and being the prize is in your mind, there is no tutorial for it
• Dont outshine him in gift giving
• If you’re talking and he’s not listening, ask ”Do you hear me? I want your opinion on this you’re so smart after all” you train him subconciously to listen and react to you while giving him a compliment
• Everytime you stress about a man, wheter he’s seeing other people etc. Reverse it. Why isn’t he stressed about you?
• You can be a pickmeisha to get their attention if you immediatly go back to yourself
• Dont carry the conversation
• Men tend to be seduced by looks, women by words. Be careful he’s not all talk, but actions too.
• When they give you the silent treatment, you act like they arent giving you the silent treatment because youre not talking to him anyway and that way it wont work on you
• ”Oh baby yeah I cant wait it’s just going to be so great, but I have to get to know you a little better first. It makes it more passionate for me, and I know you want to please me, right? I cant just sleep with anybody I barely know, it’s not exciting for me.”
• He should have more than 1 income
• Date dusties and for fun when young, start dating for funds at 23
• If he tries to come back, have a list of things you want and make him complete all of them.
• Play dumb
• If you playing the game correctly you shouldn’t be worried about commitment
• ”How you doing?” ”Oh I was doing bad but now that you called I’m feeling much better”
• Being unbothered holds actual power
• If a man ghosts you or has other options you dont care
• Dont approach men, but you can always pass them the ball
•In order to take things slow with a man you need to have high values
• My brain doesnt understand less
• ”It’s been a while since I met a handsome succesful man that’s not afraid to impress a woman”
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2024.05.16 10:05 Existing-Area-9093 Baradwaj Rangan's interview of Iraivi (lengthy, with spoilers)

Spoilers ahead…
Dear Karthik Subbaraj,
Congratulations on yet another interesting movie, and for resisting the impulse to name this one, too, after a food item. Iraivi is an unusual feminist film, in the sense that it’s seen entirely through the prism of sympathetic male characters. Your men aren’t monsters who drink or cheat on their wives or subject them to torture. They do these things, yes, but… differently. Arul (SJ Surya) drinks, but only to drown out his sense of failure – he’s a director and his film is in the cans, being held hostage by a sadistic producer. Michael (Vijay Sethupathi) has sex with Malarvizhi (Pooja Devariya), and he continues to lust after her after his marriage to Ponni (Anjali) – I love that all your women have names that suggest classical heroines, including Arul’s wife Yazhini (Kamalini Mukherjee) – but it’s a marriage he committed to in a hurry and he still hasn’t reconciled himself to it. He’s being a bastard, certainly, but he’s not a one-note villain. And the torture they inflict isn’t the stubbing-a-cigarette-into-the-wife’s-bare-arm variety. It’s more mental than physical.
So we get women who are collateral damage – and I include Arul’s comatose mother (Vadivukkarasi), and the nurse who’s not allowed to do her duty – of men being men. They’re being babies, really. Yazhini tells Arul that he should get on with his life, write another story, make another movie. He says it’s like her trying to have another child while still pregnant with their daughter. (Yes, all these men end up with girl children.) He’s a wallower – but maybe all artists are. You like to do that, don’t you Karthik? Even in a film like this, you deliver a commentary about filmmaking and the artist. Why, even Arul’s father is a sculptor, and though we never see him ill-treating his wife (thank you for sparing us the clichés of raised hands and raised voices), we’re informed that he’s responsible for her state. His son’s following the father’s footsteps. Maybe you’re trying to say that the wives of obsessed artists are doomed to become collateral damage. Your films make us think, Karthik, so thank you for that.
All your stories have at their centre a filmmaker, or at least (in the case of your first film, Pizza) a storyteller. And through them, we seem to hear your voice. “Works of art should not be in places where they are not respected.” “Namma padam pesanum, naama pesa koodadhu.” You compare masala movies to a massage with a happy ending. (I laughed, but please don’t judge me when I say I rather like massages with happy endings – I refer to masala movies, of course.) We even get a line of dialogue about Dolby Atmos. (What will the B/C-centre audience make of this, Karthik? But then you don’t really give a shit, do you? More power to you.) And you like your insider jokes. That crass, egoistic producer who does not care about art – he reminded me of the crass producer from your earlier film, Jigarthanda. You like Rajinikanth too. You referenced Thillu Mullu in Pizza, Thalapathi in Jigarthanda, and now you have Arul singing Malayala karayoram, Michael singing Oorai therinjikitten.
Or is that more of an Ilayaraja homage? You like to keep the audience guessing, right? When the Bobby Simha character in Jigarthanda said he was a Shankar-Ganesh fan, it appeared that you were mocking the endless Ilayaraja nods in Tamil cinema, but here you are, doffing your hat to the maestro. “Raja Raja dhaan.” Arul says this… twice. (By the way, which is that nightclub which plays Maanguyile poonguyile? Do let us know.) And the reuse of Unnai thaane – first in a scene between Michael and Malarvizhi; later in a scene between Michael and Ponni – is the kind of Easter egg we come to your films for. Let me list some others, though I’ll probably need to watch the film a second (or third) time to get them all. The name of the bachelors’ quarters is Ambal Mansion – it goes with your theme and title. I didn’t get the bit about the windmills (something connected to the gust of wind that makes the row of cycles fall over in the first scene?), or why you showcased the book of Shanta Shishunala Sharif’s poems. (I confess. I Googled up that name. I can’t remember the last time a Tamil film made me Google something up. Madras, maybe.) And despite your note at the beginning that Iraivi is inspired by the works of K Balachander (he made female-centric films, but I don’t know if I’d call them feminist films), this is really more of an ode to Mani Ratnam, isn’t it? Specifically, Aayidha Ezhuthu. The three men, one of them – the impulsive one – named Michael. The film starting out as Arul’s story, then becoming Michael’s story, and finally Jagan’s (Bobby Simha) story. The finale with the woman on the train. Plus, the arc of the Madhavan-Meera Jasmine plot was essentially about being easily misled (in the case of the man) and becoming collateral damage (in the case of the woman.) And yes, the rain. All that rain. As though the skies were weeping for these women.
Am I digressing, Karthik? If I am, I’m just following your style, which is the opposite of simple and linear. As a result, I find your films longer than they need to be. (You may feel the same about my reviews.) For instance, I did not care for the scene in the nightclub where a director is felicitated. I realise it was there as a last straw for Yazhini, but it felt redundant. But I suppose they couldn’t be any other way, because you like these shaggy-dog stories that you then embellish with novelistic detail. I love the way you introduce your characters, the time you take with them. Our films lay out characters and their relationship to each other the minute we set eyes on them, but you make us wait to know how Arul is related to Jagan and where Michael fits in and so on. And when it appeared that a semblance of a plot was kicking in (something about Arul needing money to buy back his film), I dug out my phone and checked: it was a whole hour into the movie. Borrowing an image from Malarvizhi’s profession (oh wait, she’s an artist too; she’s literally an artist), it’s like daubs of paint slowly forming a bigger picture.
And you really like an expansive canvas. Not only does the crass producer have a brother, you also bring in his wife later on, to conclude a deal he began making. These segments practically form a mini-movie, with another woman left reeling by the actions of her man. Your films have this… density. They’re packed – with characters, with complications, with information doled out in bits and pieces. (A character says, “Un kitta onnu sollanum.” And instead of hearing what he has to say, we cut to someone else.) Take the scene where Michael asks Arul for money he is owed. You just need to get Michael to Arul’s antiques shop, so the next part of the plot can be staged. Arul could have told Michael to collect the money at the shop. Instead, this is what we get. Arul tells Michael to wait for a week, when he can get the 50 lakhs he is owed. Michael says he wants only 10 lakhs. Arul says he has only 8 lakhs, he’ll give the remainder later. Michael goes to Arul’s father, in the hospital. He has only 5 lakhs. And he directs Michael to the shop, to get the remaining 3 lakhs. Your signature intercutting adds to this texture, Karthik. Shots of Michael and Arul’s father in the hospital are intercut with shots of Arul hunting for booze. Shots of Michael and Jagan outside a courtroom are intercut with shots of Arul being consoled by his father. Happenings are stretched and meshed the way they would be in real life, and not compacted according to the page-per-minute requirement of screenplay-writing textbooks.
I could never predict where the film was going (win!), what these people were going to do (again, win!) –though I must admit I found this to be the weakest of your “twists.” The subplot about stealing sculptures, too, I found rather conceit-y, something half-heartedly cooked up to fit with the title and the theme, rather than something plausible, something these people would do. When Michael, here, commits murder, with a hammer, I went, “This mild-mannered chap? Really?” But then, even in Jigarthanda, I wasn’t quite convinced that the characters would do the things they did. They seemed to be puppets of a screenplay rather than credible human beings, whose actions evolve organically from who they are (or at least, who they seem to be).
But even if I am not convinced by the overall trajectory of your characters, I love how fleshed-out they are on a moment-to-moment basis. I loved the scene where Arul barges into Yazhini’s house, after their separation, on the day of her engagement to someone else. In a lesser film, she would have asked him to get out, and he’d have dug his heels in, and she’d have cooled down and… But here, she rushes straight into his arms. And you make us see why. She was frustrated, fed up with him. But she’s also confused. Was she hasty in abandoning this man? Should she move on with another man? Does she even need a man? With just this one scene, you’ve compensated for the underwritten heroine of Jigarthanda. The story arc may be Arul’s, but Yazhini registers as a fully formed character. Similarly, Michael’s arc allows for the delineation of Ponni and Malarvizhi, and through Jagan, we get glimpses of his mother, and possibly of all womanhood as viewed by a compassionate man. And then you say that women don’t need even this compassionate man (poor chap!), that they have to emancipate themselves instead of looking for a penis-wielding emancipator. What delicious irony, given that you begin the film with women talking about marriage, tying themselves to a man!
Or not, in the case of Malarvizhi, who is easily the film’s most interesting character. Her husband is dead, and she doesn’t want love anymore – only sex. When Michael buys her a diamond necklace, she gives it back to him – she can buy her own trinkets, thank you very much. But the character feels shoe-horned into the film, Karthik. I felt betrayed – and I bet she did too – that after a point, she was used simply as a plot device to get Michael and Ponni together, and also to illustrate Michael’s (who is now standing in for all of mankind) hypocrisy. I felt she deserved more. And yet, I appreciated your generosity in fleshing her out like all the others, without judging her. She gets to be the rare woman in Tamil cinema who dumps the man, and the way she lets go of Michael is echoed in the way Arul lets go of Yazhini, with a heavy heart and some playacting. A side effect of the Malarvizhi subplot is the reassurance that Vijay Sethupathi is still interested in making cinema, rather than just massy entertainers targeted at the box office.
Ponni gets a better deal (and Anjali is terrific, raw and expressive in a way she has never been). In a great scene – rather, a set of book-ending scenes – Michael tells Ponni that he was forced to marry her, and she’s going to have to “adjust” to this if she wants to be with him. Much later, she throws the “adjust” word back on his bearded face when he asks her if she slept with someone else. In a different kind of movie, we’d be invited to see this symmetry, stand up and applaud. But you’re too subtle for that, Karthik. Iraivi is your subtlest film. Which is why I winced at the melodramatic lines about men and women, most of which came towards the end. Aan, using the long-sounding vowel, versus penn, with the shorter one – for such a visual filmmaker (this is another outstandingly shot film, less showy than Jigarthanda and probably richer for that), do you really need the crutch of linguistic special effects from another era of filmmaking? Also, when the rest of your film is so allusive, isn’t there another way you can explain the twist without having a character resort to such an inelegant information dump?
And why is it that your films come together more in the head than in the heart? Why are they easier to admire than love wholeheartedly? I used to think it was because your characters are essentially deceitful, self-serving and unsympathetic, so though we were invested in what they did, we didn’t really warm up to them. But here, you have Ponni and Yazhini and Malarvizhi – and they’re still remote. But perhaps this is bound to happen when there are so many people, so many strands, when we don’t follow one person’s simplistic “you go, girl” journey like we do in, say, 36 Vayadhinile? But when the parts are so well-crafted, we don’t complain as much about their sum not adding up to a satisfying whole. I am sure that you will, one day, make that wholly satisfying film, but for now, thank you for these parts. Thank you for the ambition. I felt there were too many songs (some good work by Santhosh Narayanan), but thank you for ensuring that they don’t break character, the way songs usually do when a character speaking in his or her voice suddenly segues into the playback singer’s voice. Thank you for giving us SJ Surya, the actor – I never dreamed he had such a capacity to hold a scene, to hold the screen. Thank you for continuing not to sell out. Thank you for trying to do so much, even if not all of it needed to have been tried. And thank you for making me fight with myself, for not making it easy to decide if you’ve made a “good” film or a merely “okay” film. For now, Iraivi is a fascinating film, and that’s enough.
Sincerely, etc.
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2024.05.16 09:59 Defiant_Buy_101 The diagnosis delemia: behind the multi million dollar industry of healthcare monitoring

Chapter 1: the event
It was the fall of my intern year as I bean my off service trauma rotation. This month was ubiquitously notorious for being the most labor intrusive and least productive rotaion of our emergency medicine program. Knowing this I entered with the intention of simply surviving the month.
Another intern and I let’s call them A for sake of ambiguity, we’re the first emergency medicine residents to roste on the trauma services that year. A shaky start would be an understatement. In the words of chance the raper “like my grama with the Parkinson’s playing operation.” Would better describe it. Medically we did well. We were very competent and completed our work daily, but communication and coordination was non existent. Our Cheifs had informed us that Tuesday was our day of and the Trauma cheif residents had minimum communication with us, or our Cheifs as it seams when A and I did not report on Tuesday they sternly made their dissatisfaction known.
I have struggled with insomnia sense the age of 10. Had 2 sleep studies by this point in my life and been prescribed nearly every sleeping aid on the market. The 80-94 hr work weeks of our trauma rotaion only worsened my insomnia. My lack of sleep likely contributed to a less than prime adaptive immune system and 2 days out of my trauma rotaion I contracted strep like symptoms with associated nausea, requiring me to call for a sick day the next day. No the first day that I felt too ill to work. I was not fully aware of the reporting process. I reported to my Chiefs, but I did not believe I could come to work tomorrow with amble time and notice, however I was somewhat delayed in letting their Cheifs know, because the surgical chiefs rotated every few days and I did not know who my was going to be the next day. The second day which I had to call out sick I was able to locate the cheif for the next day and reprot according to our university’s protocol, which requires that if a resident feels they are not fit for work they must not come in and the university must have staff coverage without any fear or implementation of punitive actions.
I had finally survived to the last week of my trauma rotaion and I could see the light at the end of the tunnel. What I could not see was the pile of stress, shitty diet, lack of mental well ness and sleep deprivation which I was pushing down to reach the light. By this time I had seen a psychiatrist regularly for sleep medication. I had mentioned to him that I had been experiencing more stressed lately and feel that I might be depressed. he reassured me that it was likely only due to my circumstances, given the difficulty of the trauma rotation and wish to reassess once the rotation was over. Looking back I had to fill the habit of drinking more than I usually do. My only on nights before I have days off became 1-2 beers every other night. All of this repressed unhealthy shit finally pushed bad on September 23rd. That night I was at work even later than usual, I stayed up later than usual and couldn’t seem to fall asleep. With the stress of only having minimal sleep and knowing I only had 2 more days of trauma left, I took an extra dose of my sleeping medication.
I opened my eyes to the fighting sight of sun beaming in my window and I instantly knew I was late. (Sense I hadn’t seen the sun in a month) . Due to my need for scrupulous sleep hygiene I have been sleeping with my phone of and away for me. I rushed to grab it and watched as the little Apple logo seamed to glow on the screen for an eternity. Then in conjunction with its fading I saw 3 missed calls from my director, a text from college A and 2 missed calls from the surgical director. Still, I was able to calm myself, knowing that resident A had been late to this rotation by a few hours 2 other days and nothing came of it. I called my director back and he asked me to report to his office where I was greeted by my director, my coordinator and another emergency medicine facility.
With the only explanation of: “we just want you to get better”, I was handed a letter, to my relief it did not entail my termination, but a declaration of administrative leave and a requirement to undergo an evaluation at a well known university in Florida.
Lake any other savvy millennial, I did my research. By research I mean numerous google searches and screeches thru the depts of redit. To my dismay I discovered that in order for a residency program to fire you, they must first initiate an administrative suspension. I would soon find out however, being terminated would have been a delightful outcome compared to what ensued.
I spend the next few weeks in the wallos of regret and depression. I indulged in higher qualities of alchohol then I ever have before. I all but ceased communing with peers, and abruptly stoped any physical activity I had once enjoyed. Frightened as I was I was ensured, it will be ok “we just want you to get better”
Chapter 2 The evaluation : guilty until proven innocent I did exactly as instructed and scheduled an evaluation, I supposed that this was either a mental evaluation to assess if I’m fit for work with plans of termination or it actually was an evaluation to better treat my insomnia. To this day I regret my ignorance, and wish I had researched the process more. The Hindi / sand-skrt idea of Hamsa 🪬 is that in order to do any good you must have full knowledge or else good intentions can result in harm. I truely believe my director had good intentions, however but him and I did not have full knowledge of the nature of this evaluation.
Looking back see how easily I could have avoided my troubles by asserting legal aid at this point or even by researching this evaluation process more in depth. If one searches impaired practitioner program which I now know this evaluator works for, the search entire will populate 5 or 6 layferms along side their home website and there is a valid reason for this.
If one every finds themself in this process I employ you to bring a DSM to your evaluation or at least be familiar with the most common use disorders in the DSM-5, because your evaluation will turn into a dance of questions where the evaluator attempts to trap you in a round about way to stating something that may qualify for one of the diagnosis. I have provided an image from the DSM-5 below outlining AUD, which the evaluator concluded that I had the most severe from:
Image
Example***** Here are 10 examples of how he fraudulently assessed me taken directly from his assessment note.
  1. Evaluator: Have you ever stoped drinking in the last year.
Me: yes I stoped every week day, I was only drinking on the weekends, until two weeks ago.
-Evaluator uses stoping and starting every week to qualify for 2 or more unsuccessful attempts to stop in the last year “There is a persistent desire or unsuccessful efforts to cut down or control alcohol use.”
  1. Evaluator Have you ever had withdrawal symptoms
Me no
Evaluator Well Have you ever had a hangover? You know that’s a from of acute withdrawal
Me: yes in college, I had a few but that was years ago and I’m pretty sure the pathophysiology is different.
Evaluator uses this to count for withdrawal symptoms even tho is was more than a year ago
  1. Evaluator: Have you even taken your sleeping medication on a day or night which you drank? Me: Yes, I took my prescriptions are prescribed but I never drank close to bed
Evaluator: qualified this as dangerous behavior with alcohol (where the DSM gives examples such as unprotected sex and drunk driving). The sleeping medication I was on is not a benzodiazepine therefore it is not deadly with alcohol. I personally have seen many patients in the ED who have taken their entire bottle of the medication and drank copious amounts, we just monitor them over night and rehydrate them
  1. Evaluator Has anyone told you you drink to much or been worried about you Me: No I drink much less than my friends
Evaluator what about your girlfriend? Me: well she actually doesn’t drink at all she doesn’t like it. She often buys me beer for The Weeknd’s tho. One time we went to a movie and she got a little irritated because I waited for beer then complained about them not having any craft beer. So she said, “you couldn’t have just said no” and drank something else. However, she apologized after and said it’s worth waiting if it’s my only day off.
Evaluator said this qualifies for continued drinking despite causing significant relation consequences, ie divorce.
  1. Evaluator : you have sleep issues I hear, and your chart says you’ve had depression in the past, don’t you know that alcohol can effect your sleep and mood Me: yes that’s why I never drink within 3 hours of sleep.
Evaluator but you knew this and still drank
Evaluator: qualifies for drinking despite unwanted physical or psychological effects (this should be recurring to effects the alcohol is causing, I have had insomnia sense the age of 10 long before I took my first sip)
7 evaluator you were late for work and told my you had a drink the day before
Me: Yes but I was late because I didn’t sleep and took double my sleeping meds, I will never do that again
Qualifies for 2 significant work or school issues in the past year ( a therapist and other psychologist ensured me that being late on or a few days doesn’t count they typically are getting fired or failing) ( moreover, this would assume I was late do to drinking it’s self and also assume if happened more than once)
  1. • Alcohol is often taken in larger amounts or over a longer period than was intended
He never once asked anything related to this question yet said I qualified in his final report 9. A great deal of time is spent in activities necessary to obtain alcohol, use alcohol, or recover from its effects. The evaluators logic here was sense I was late for work and I had 2 beers the day before I must be taking long to recover from it (this is assuming I missed due to alcohol)
  1. Tolerance drinking more to require the same effect: this he checked as true in his final note however it was never even discussed in our evaluation. I did mention to him that I’ve been drinking more than I had earlier in the year frequency wise, but they said nothing to do with quantity or needing more.
  2. Wanting to drink so bad you can not think of anything else: this is the only qualification of SAUD my evaluator said I did not have.
Moreover, without legal help I was not aware that I could obtain a second evaluation or even oppose going to get evaluated at all, but that wouldn’t have mattered seeing I still thought this was for my health and wellbeing as seen when I was asked why do you think you are here to today, to which I replayed “so that I can be evaluated to see what is needed to get back to work”.
To maks the ordeal more infuriating the evaluator continues to ingratiate himself and lie through the process telling you, “it will be fine as long as you are 100% honest”, “anything you say in here is between you and me” or “you slipped up once with your meds, I know your residnecy program they will probably just want a few more out patient tests”
Two weeks later I received a phone call right before I left for an out of state vacation to visit my nice for her birthday. During the call I was informed that I would be required to complete a partial hospitalization program (PHP) lasting “6-10 weeks” which would coast from 15-50 grand not including doctor visits or housing which is billed separately. I suppressed this inconvenience, enjoyed my vocation and reported when I returned, knowing that I must complete this soon so I may return to work with due to the fact that my payed time off would soon be diminished. At this time I had not yet heard of the organization PRN.
Chapter 3 Guilty till proven innocent: The diagnosis
Shell shocked I arrived to a in patient psychiatric unit and was rapidly cleared to progress to treatment without detoxification. During my 90 day of forced rehabilitation I met a few other individuals who were unjustly and fraudulently forced into treatment. I began to look up to one of these such members of the men’s community, who I will refer to as patient X for ambiguity sake.
Unlike me patient X did have alcohol use disorder. He spent many clinic days drinking to avoid alcoholic withdraws. The curious component of his story is that he admitted his depravity, saught help and through his own journey became sober. The bodies at be, namely his local physician, Health monitoring program, rejected his personal path to sobriety and forced him to undergo 90 days of in patient treatment before he could practice medicine again. When he checked in to rehab he had been sober for over a year.
Ask for Stories of people from online
As for me I spend many sleepless nights pondering how consuming a legal substance in a moderate amount could throw me into significant legal financial issues. My labs my toxicology, my story and my collateral from colleagues from colleagues all indicated light to moderate alcohol use but my evaluators word stood as the word of God.
More frightening was the director of this rehabs acknowledgment of this. The director who happens to also coincidentally be the evaluator, stated to me as well as to staff on multiple occasions: “ I suggest inpatient treatment for everyone who is reported”. “This is safer for me not to miss anyone who could harm patients, and I figure there must be a reason someone reported them.”
I am still elucidating the reason why I was determined guilty and proven innocent, however I can say from my 90 day stent that the majority of the patients at this rehab needed to be there. This program is saving lives of both providers and patients, however it is destroying the lives of those wrongfully accused.
Chapter 4 your lisense rehab or jail : Upon arivil I was sent to a detox hospital underwent a medical examination and was “one of the lucky ones” who required no detoxification and could report directly to PHP. Like everyone else, I spent 90 days in a PHP, being as 6-10 weeks is simply a lie they tell patients to decrease the change of resisting the treatment. When discussing the topic one therapist sated “if we told patients 90 days they would never come.” She then attempted to justify the treatment by outlining the story of a patient she had called who “didn’t make it to treatment” and killed themselves”. It is my belief that it is not the lack of PHP which impelled such professionals to take their life, but them realizing that they now will be obliged to undergo 90 days of PHP, 5 years of PRN monitoring with a loss of autonomy and hundreds of thousands of dollars taken from them that induced their hopelessness. For even if these professionals were truly mentally unstable in their addictions, in every case it was only following a phone call where they were informed they must undergo treatment that they took their life’s. By this time I still haven’t the slightest clue what PRN was.
Despite the security these programs provide for many my 6 main issues with them can be summarized in : 1. Kick backs: evaluators are directors of treatment clinics 2. The reported are guilty till proven innocent 3. The price, the overflow of money these places drag in from both patients and state universities is appalling, they charge separately for every visit and test 4. Although they make the claim that they are individualized, they are anything but. Every patient gets the same stay and treatment from the doctor drunk on the job and the one who was late to a shift 5. They force voluntary treatment. remember that friendly evaluator who promised he had your best interest at heart, so you opened up and told him everything about your substance use/ developmental / family history, well if you don’t stay for 90 days he will be “normally obliged” to tip the board of medical off to you.
  1. The programs have overstepped their intended jurisdiction. -these programs work well if they function how they were intended at their inception. Cite original purpose. Originally these programs were designed to protect physicians and civilians from impaired practitioners; being healthcare workers who were impaired at work. Over the years, these organizations have extended their authority to encompass individuals with substance use disorders When not at work and also those who are in training to become healthcare professionals. Take for example myself compared to a physician who is impaired at work. A doctor who arrived for duty under the influence would surely benifit from the extensive testing, therapy and accountability enforced via these programs. In accordance the 20,000$ per year cost is appropriate when only making up roughly 7% of their yearly salary vs nearly half of a residents. In my case with my loss of income from employment, coast of treatment and monitoring, this year I will be required to pay 20,000$ to work. Yes, I will be losing money to work. Even if did indeed have a substance use disorder this level of monitoring wouldn’t not be considered appropriate.
Dispite all of the miscomings of this System My time spend in PHP was indeed helpful, as I believe it would be for anyone. Time for exercise, a reprieve from work and weekly counseling. A sample structure of my day to day schedule is provided below for insight:
Structure The general structure of these rehabitation centers is as follows: 1. One week of orientation phase, where you are not allowed in electronics or contact with the outside world world. Therefore, if you’re going, bring some things you would like to read or study. 2. In phase 2, you can use your phone however you cannot leave campus. You must stay in the dorm on campus. These shitty 1 room run down apartments with two other roommates will cost you about $1000 a week, they are required for at least four weeks and they are billed separately, no insurance will help you out here. 3. In phase 3 you can commute to campus if you beg your therapist and live very close. Whether you’re on campus or living off-campus, you are allowed to leave up to four hours per day. If you commute, you’ll be required to take a sober link decide you must Breath, alcohol test into every 6 hours. Like everything else in this program you must pay for this separately, a few hundred dollars a week. You advanced to other phases by completing assignments, however, assignments are limited by required built-in time, intrusive, scheduling, and reviewing. Therefore, if you do everything as rapidly as possible phase 1 will take one week phase 2 will take three weeks.
Every day schedule:
7:30: wake up, report to the front desk to inform them that you haven’t ran away yet and take and prescribed medications. They keep all your medications and require that you report to take them; for me this was antidepressants in an attempt to dispel the depression I contracted from being forced into treatment and whatever off label medication they were attempting to treat my ADHD with, since control medications were forbidden.
8 am: community group assessments This consisted of other patients presenting their assignments amongst the large group, on the weekends this was often an hour later and 12 study regularly took the place of assignment presentation.
10 am: process group. This was a two hour group therapy session with 6 to 12 other professionals in a therapist and training or occasionally a licensed mental health therapist.
1 pm: recreation This was generally about an hour of some sober themed craft or activity. Once a week this time slot was used for yoga.
2 pm: this was another time slot used for patients to present assignments as well as for individual therapy sessions. Each patient had one individual therapy session lasting 30 minutes per week.
3pm: This was time allotted to work on assignments or go to the gym on your sex specific scheduled gym day.
5pm: this time was used for guest speakers or another 12 step study group.
6 pm : this was generally an off-campus 12 step group
10 pm: report to the front desk and let them know you still haven’t ran away and take and Medication which are prescribed to take at night, then return to your cot bed in your room with 1-2 other roommates.
I found the community to be one of the most beneficial aspects of the PHP program. I was in a cohort of chill ass professionals of the same occupation who were always there to help each other.
Assignments The curriculum of the PHP consisted of assignment based on every step of the 12th step program. Generally, a patient would be required to complete an assignment on their own, review it with other patients, then faculty and finally present the assignment in front of the whole treatment group. You’re only given one assignment at a time and there are multiple steps to each which all requires scheduling this ensures that no matter how determined a patient is a full 90 days of treatment is required to complete all the assignments.
AA structure -the obsolete nature of AA has been verified in numbers studies, but I will refrain from divulging here and lend that endeavor to Dr. Lance Dodes very thorough discussion on the subject,in “the sober truth “
In all sincerity, if I truely did have a severe use disorder this experience could have been life saving. I only wish I could have used my 50 grand for someone who has spent their life time In addictive without reprieve. My first conversation when I was given my phone back was how I wish my father could be able to attend this PHP.
Chapter 5 reporting and PRN Self reporting What they ask you What you should tell them
There’s a third-party agency called professional resource network. Every state has their own. This agency works as a liaison between you and whatever credentialing service your occupation requires. Essentially they ensure your monitoring after treatment. Stake governments and licensing boards trust them, mainly because they monitor with the highest level of intrusiveness. This alleviates much work for state governments and licensing boards because once an individual is being monitored by a professional resource network, then they are deemed appropriate for duty and no further investigation/litigation needs to occur, as long as the monitored individual completely complies.
Because I was never impaired at work I was never reported to this agency. The general workflow of things someone would report you to professional resource network, then the resource network would contact you, and then you would be required to report for an evaluation at a treatment center, which would inevitably result in a suggestion I’ve treatment at that given treatment center. In my case I was sent to the treatment center without PRN being involved. Thus, two weeks into treatment. I was notified by my therapist that I needed to call PRN and self report. I attempted to resistance given that I did not have a problem and was not individually seeking help. I asked what happened if I didn’t self report. I was told that in order to stay in the treatment program I had to report to PRN. This meant either I report to PRN or I get kicked out of the treatment program and lose my job.
When you report to PRN they will ask you why you are in treatment. They will then list off every substance imaginable, asking you if you have ever tried the substance and when your last use was. Ultimately, they will obtain your discharge information from your treatment center, so it is in your best interest to report only what was found in your biochemical testing. If it wasn’t in your hair, I would argue that you don’t have a use disorder regarding that substance and it’s not relevant. I don’t believe it’s important for them to know that you smoked weed when you were 12.
Chapter 6 The contract:
Before being discharged from a treatment facility, a professional resource network will have you sign a contract. A little known fact which I was oblivious to is that contracts can be negotiated. Though this isn’t it possible, it is highly improbable that you can negotiate your contract since PRN has a power to delay your clearance to return to work.
Contractor almost never personalized, and I have not heard of a contract which is not a five-year agreement. You will sign releases of information so that PRN has access to all of your information which was gathered at the treatment facility. You must have a therapist, psychiatrist, primary care, doctor, and a addiction, medicine psychiatrist. You assign releases of information for all of them. You will be required To commit to: 1. three mutual aid meetings a week which you must log. I log smart recovery meetings. 2. Weekly therapy sessions with an approved mental health therapist from their list 3. Monthly doctors appointments with an addiction medicine psychiatrist 4. Yearly appointments with a primary care physician 5. Monthly appointments with a psychiatrist 6. Daily check-ins on a random drug testing app ( you will agree to weekly urine tests, a peth test 4 times a year, a hair test twice a year and a little caveat that says anything else they deem, clinically reasonable) 7. Quarterly update reports which you are required to obtain from a workplace monitor, therapist, addiction, medicine, psychiatrist, primary care physician and any other doctor you are seeing. 8. You must upload all of your prescriptions into a mobile application every single time you get them refilled and are not allowed to take them until they are approved. 9. Attendance of a PRN group via zoom. This is a local group you are assigned along with other monitored practitioners. There is a fee of roughly 130$ a month to attend this required group. For me all of these requirements coast around 20,000 a year. If you ever have a positive test even if it is the result of contamination from rubbing alcohol or unintentional ingestion of alcohol/ allergy medication your contract will rest to 5 years from the time of positive test. Once your five year contract is completed, you must ask to be released from monitoring. At that point they will search for any reason to keep you under monitoring. This could be dilute urines, daily check ins or a week where you did not attend mutual aid meetings. Every certification and license which you apply for will likely ask you if you were under a monitoring program/ have been treated for substance use. You must give an explanation and check yes. As far as licensing programs are concerned, if you were under the monitoring of PRN, you are safe, however they group practitioners who have had behavioral issues with practitioners who were diverting drugs from work. Therefore, keep in mind that you will be labeled as a sever addict.
7 Back to work and only work. During treatment your only goal is to return to work, however when you return your experience will be drastically distinct from what you remember. For me, I was now working in isolation. Missing six months of my training meant that no other Resident was on the same rotation as me. My coworkers at all formed friend groups. When I returned I was greeted with much concern for my well being. No one would speak to be about my absence, however everyone knew there is only one reason a resident would leave for 6 months then return. My Accdeemic meetings were consisting of attending telling me “I have a target on my back now” and “ I have to preform even better than others” in the light of my time missed. If this wasn’t alienating enough, the majority of Resident events, sponsored by recruiters and my university revolved around alcohol to which I had to give some excuse to why I can not partake with others. I’m fortunate that I do not have an addiction, because these stressful conditions along with the daunting amount of dead and requirements imposed by PRN are enough to make any addict relapse. While I was at treatment, I was in the dative with Samyr stories a physicians whose addictions got the best of them. Physicians who did not make it to treatment, often taking their own life. These stories were presented as a warning. Your addictions will kill you without our treatment was the message. When, in reality I did not hear one story in which the addiction killed physician. Every physician who didn’t make it to treatment took their life after being told they must report to a treatment facility. Perhaps they knew what this entailed and it was not their addiction or getting caught which caused them to end their lives, but the unmanageable and often unreasonable burden that treatment would put on their lives.
9 How to escape So your fucked your in PRN and should be or you should and now your recovered and want to terminated your contract.
  1. You ask to be released early done at 1/2 time ( good luck)
  2. You have “good reason” (no one has ever been let out of contract because of this reason, the verbiage is far too vague)
  3. You serve all your time and they let you out(maybe, as discussed earlier, they would do everything they can to keep you in your contract as long as your practicing)
  4. You can’t practice medicine anymore
10 Layer up butter cup : I cannot emphasize the extent to which legal help is required in this process. You much seek it and seek it early. Lawyers can provide many avenues to you early in the process. Once you have committed to treatment, gone for evaluation or are in a PRN contract , this is very little that you or legal help can do. Spend a few thousand dollars when you are accused and save the 20-30,000 later.
After you have been evaluated if you disagree as I did, then this is the process you must undergo. 1. Hire a occupation, defense, lawyer 2. Prove you don’t have an addiction, this is done by having an alternative evaluator with similar credentials state that either you don’t have an addiction or that PRN’s level of monitoring is not medically appropriate ( this will need to be a multi day neuropsychological evaluation, which will cost about $5000). 3. Your lawyer must draft in writing that the medical level of monitoring is not required such as another medical professional and send this to PRN 4. PRN will tattle on you to the board of medicine. 5. The board of medicine will conduct an investigation. 6. At the end or when they believe they have enough reasonable evidence to the board of medicine will suspend your license or claim, you must comply with the PRN contract to practice. 7. At this time your lawyer will defend you in the state court against the board. This is costly but much less than the coast of a 5 year PRN contract 8. If you win you will likely suggest an alternative level of care such as gonna get therapy every week. If you lose, than you wasted a fuck ton of money and are still bound by your PRN contract.
Overall this entire process has coast me Over all coast:
My finances for this year only including PRN and rent are as follows:
120-200$ every week for testing 480-800/ month
65 every week for therapy 195/month
125 every month for PRN group
About 50-69 every month for 2 doctor apts
So at least 745$/month at the lowest
Treatment at the recovery center coast 20,000 for me out of pocket and
I wasn’t payed for 6 months with no FMLA because I am a first year. At the 1 year mark I will have made 26,000 this year after taxes And payed About 29,000 on PRN alone
Rent is 1,000 so that’s 12,000 a year
Just in rent and PRN alone I will be at 26,000- 41,600 -15,600.
I will be in debt by at least 18,000 at the 1 year mark
Coast of treatment center 20,000 (with insurance) For each year of PRN roughly 20,000 Add that to 6 months of attending salary which was delayed due to my treatment time: at least 150,000 Layer coasts along with other evaluations 25,000 Missing 6 months of residency pay 30,000 Coast of 1 year in monitoring: 245,000 Coast of 5 years 325,000
If my case progress to a trail I will require an extra 20,000 in court coasts
Chapter 11 My secondary eval: Dr sushi After I arrived at my treatment center I challenge my evaluation multiple times. Each and every time I was discharged and often accused of alternate mental health/ substance abuse issues to discourage my advances. I was never given the opportunity to undergo alternative assessment, however PRN guidelines state that you can obtain a second option within 7 days of your first. This is a mute point, however, because you will not receive the results of your evaluation until over a week after it is conducted and the second evaluation must be conducted by another PRN hired evaluator of their choosing. During my stay in rehab I contacted PRN multiple times to attempt another evaluation/ legal help. They warned against both stating they were a “waste of money” and “pointless”.
After completing my treatment with the guidance of many addiction, experienced physicians, mental health counselors and psychiatrists recommendations I sought in a secondary evaluation. I chose a highly qualified professional with over 30 years of experience to conduct an extensive neuo psycho social evaluation of me. One that I was sure would be more extensive than the evaluation I received at treatment and more importantly an unbiased evaluation.
The results from my evaluation not only showed that I did not have a substance abuse problem warranting PRN level monitoring, but also that PRN was falling to allow adequate treatment of other conditions such as my ADHD. My evaluation showed my ADHD was not only untreated by PRNs attempt at using non controlled medication, but also in the top 3% most severe presentations of ADHD. My evaluator went on to explain my results by questioning why my treatment center even mandated I undergo neuro cognitive evaluation. The only neurodiverse findings were my IQ, my dyslexia and my ADHD. However, a neuo cognitive examination can be billed separately by treatment centers, therefore they always recommend one.
Chapter 12 Amongst its greed, intrusive nature and faulty accusations, professional recourse network function highly proficiently at the task they were designed to; protective physicians and patients from physicians who are impaired at work. In this domain they save lives, offer second changes and protect the public. When they act beyond their intended jurisdiction by imposing unnecessary monetary demands on practitionersin training, accuse practitioners without proof or act on behavior exemplified outside of a work setting they unjustly and inappropriately attack the week and innocent.
Proposed reform: As a trainee my universities malpractice insurance covers me for mistakes made at work. If a learner mistakenly harms a patient, then the university stands on their behalf. If the learner does something wrong under a teachers direct guidance, then the teacher is at fault. This makes sense logically as well as pragmatically. The state entrusts large amounts of money to hospital systems and universities to train resident physicians. A portion of this money is allocated to malpractice insurance. This should extend to accused impairment.
Suppose a training university was required to cover rehabilitation and monitoring of a resident of whom they claim is impaired. Alternatively they have the option of firing the trainee. This would reduce the number of innocent trainees being accused of impairment, make the process of rehabilitation more fair and provide a better use for tax payer derived dollars, which hospital systems are given to train residents. The truly impaired could still seek help, less false accusations would be made and with the employers having the ability to fire at the moment of impairment, there would be less chance of impairment at work.
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2024.05.16 09:14 safoamz1zz Is she off or am I an asshole?

Girl at work pursued me, begged me to take her out etc. Infatuated with me. Told her im not interested in a serious relationship, just only looking for casual. She said she was down for a casual/hookup. I figured in my head this means she's down to have sex. She admitted later she actually wanted a serious relationship but would be WILLING to try casual since she really liked me.
She asked me how far we would take it, I said no limits..... but she wasnt ok with that. She says you don't need sex to have an intimate physical relationship, we can be intimate in "other ways", basically She wants to do EVERYTHING BUT SEX (she actually listed all the things including handjobs, masturbating each other, kissing, touching, etc. Says she wants to feel desired.
Says intercourse is a privilge that only comes with commitment and serious relationships and shes not willing to "give it to me"
I tell her that it surprises me because most peoples definition for a casual/hookup relationship includes sex, in fact sex is the "main dish" and all the other activities are side dishes sort of like going to a restaurant to mainly eat that juicy steak or burger and the fries/salad are just complimentary.
She said I was comparing women to food etc etc got REALLLY upset and basically felt like I only wanted to have sex with her and nothing else, if thats the case i should just go buy a toy. I'm like i never said i dont want do do all the other stuff, it's just that sex is the 'main course' to me so to speak, everything else is complimentary. Then she spammed my phone telling me she wishes she never asked for my number, regrets everything etc etc. Why the hell did she get so mad? I wanted sex, she didnt want sex, end of story.
Is she kinda off or am i an asshole? She's 30, single, inexperienced with men says she hasnt dated much.
Thinking back were these red flags I missed? She once talked about how all her girlfriends had an urge to get married during their early 20s but she didn't understand that, she sort of talked down on them for doing that (is this some "dont need no man vibes"?). Also talked a lot about 'toxic masculinty' (idk how that shit came up I was just like mannn dont talk to me about that I dont care about any of that stuff).
Slightly offtopic but she only used the word "intercourse" to refer to sex which was just weird to me. Is it weird that I find it weird?
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2024.05.16 08:57 Different_Maybe_2348 Rent-A-Center Harrassmemt …?

Rent-A-Center Dilemma
I signed up for a rental agreement with Rent A Center back in November 2023. They were very unorganized but moving forward, I had my delivery set up. One of the managers Stephon and a driver delivered my washer and dryer set. The manager was friendly and I was just ready for his ass to get out of my house. So moving forward, I receive a text and it’s from an out of state number saying that it was him. The damn manager! 1.) I did not give you my number at anytime inside my home so why would you feel comfortable texting me!!? This manager had gotten my number off of my paperwork. I was so confused and pissed THE F**K off that I said my dryer is missing a component just to try and not overthink that he was overstepping boundaries. He stated that he would check in the back of their warehouse to see if they had the piece I needed and he would come put it on. Well they didn’t have the piece. So I ordered it and told him I think I can manage putting it on myself. Y’all !!! Why did this man come over on his launch break that he gets like 45 mins to an hour break. He took every bit of 5 minutes to put the part on but would not LEAVE ! He was asking about my cooking. Asking me was I single. Told me what type of man I deserve. Told me he scanned the parking lot and knew which car was mine. He was very weird. He basically stayed his entire break. I was so weirded out and tried not to overreact because of the business contract. Not knowing what to do. I also was home alone with my 22 month old son at the time. He was sleeping upstairs. So I ended up telling my boyfriend and he’s like why did this manager try and pull this mess while not there. Here’s the kicker you guys: I have a ring doorbell camera and it has record of all of this and the time stamps and days. Fast forward to January 2024, the manager texted me happy new years !! Like what? Why would you do that and I haven’t shown any interest in you!!? So moving forward I got behind like a few days on my weekly payment actually because I forgot and called to try and work a payment date out with them. Tell me why he went off on me, told me he was not going to help me and that they were coming to get my stuff and that the manager I needed to speak with was not in and ended up hanging up the phone in my face. I tried calling back and no answer. So I called the headquarters and told them what happened. They acted like they were going to do something and I told them about his personal number and area code which I shouldn’t have known and also where he told me he was from which why would I know. I also mentioned other things. Do you they didn’t offer anything for the hassle and weirdness. Nothing at all. So my job closed down and they started calling me from a new number. I had old them I would come in to pay cash. So I get up there and the credit manager had already given me the amount I needed to pay and was like yea I’ll work with you cause you always pay on time. I get up there like 10 mins later. Tell me why I pay for both weeks and they do not give me my change back and say we credited it. I’m like I didn’t ask you all to do that. Then it’s 3 men in the store (including the manager I had originally had an issue with texting me) all employees only and they are discussing my biz and the one who had given me the phone call with the amount I owed was right there as well. And I’m like why would you all not return my change. That’s not how it works. Ya’ll didn’t state that beforehand. So I walked out and the manager that I had to deal with months before who still has his job was like what’s wrong as I’m walking out. I was just disgusted. It was doggish and I’m just going to sue them at this point because you’re not going to take my money and then think it’s cool to harass me and I’m a paying customer. I was wanting to hear some feedback to see if I’m tripping or what… I’m also wanting to see if maybe I had a possible case. Because I believe so wholeheartedly !
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2024.05.16 08:45 VoidKiller826 Wonder Women #50 - Revelations, Part 1

Wonder Women

Issue Fifty
Written by u/VoidKiller826
Edited by u/Predaplant
Arc: Revelations
*************************************************************
Greetings, people of Gateway City. This is your new peacekeeper speaking. You might know me as the White Magician, a rather crude name, but I will accept it considering Man’s World's lack of creativity. However, you may also call me Circe, and I am here with an important message that your news station will deliver for all to hear.
SCYTHE is no more: their HQ is under my and the Red Centipedes’ command. The Commander and his soldiers are dead and buried, as you all wished to happen. I was more than happy to oblige you if it meant depriving your stupid President of her next chance for reelection. Any survivors of the prison break are being hunted down by the people they locked in cages, who are more than happy to round them up as they once had been themselves.
But none of that’s important, for this recording is only to be heard by one person: Olympos, Wonder Girl, or whatever the fuck new title name you want to be called. This message is for you: You are to surrender yourself to me here in SCYTHE HQ in the next five hours, and in turn, I will not destroy this piss-end of a city. If you fail, I promise you, I will make Coast City look like a picnic by the time I finish with Gateway.
That cow you call Wonder Woman is dead, and I will make sure everyone else will follow her if you don’t comply with my request.
Your mentor learned a valuable lesson when she tested my patience.
*************************************************************
Spears Apartment - Gateway City:
[...President Cale has announced the complete closure of all access to Gateway City following the prison break that occurred in SCYTHE’s holding facility hours ago,] said Cassandra Arnold from GateNews, the city’s main news station. [We still have an unconfirmed number of escapees following the message sent by the White Magician, but the President has assured GateNews a solution will be found.]
Vanessa Kapatelis watched the TV in dismay. Pacing back and forth in the Spears duplex apartment, she had the TV on to pass the time while Ares worked on helping Helena and Cassandra upstairs.
“Here,” Vanessa turned away from the TV to see Tanya Spears handing her a bottle of water. “Something for you to drink.”
“Thank you,” Vanessa accepted the bottle. “I would prefer a beer, but this will make do.”
“My mom has her wine collection in a locked cabinet,” Tanya noted, pointing at the kitchen. “She doesn’t know that I know that, but I can get you a bottle?”
Vanessa chuckled. “Thanks, but I don’t want a girl your age to be walking around with alcohol or to get you in trouble with your mom.” She twisted the bottle cap and slowly drank. “I needed that… it feels like I’ve been dry for months.”
“It’s actually been 3 hours,” Tanya said, sitting on the sofa and opening her tablet to look over the internet. “I hope what she said wasn’t true… about Wonder Woman not being around…”
Taking a seat by her side, Vanessa saw that Tanya was reading through the report on what happened to SCYTHE. The escaped convicts had taken control of the SCYTHE headquarters and equipment after killing many of the agents that had stood in their way.
Seeing the photo of SCYTHE HQ burning angered her. That place should represent the absolute shield of Gateway. Now, it had come under the control of the convicts that they were supposed to stop because of Aeeta Branwen. A name that had made her happy now belonged to a stranger who had lied to her all this time.
Memories of their most intimate moments came flooding back: their first conversation, their first date, their kiss, and the morning after their date in her apartment. It was a moment when she thought she could finally stop grieving and move on from what happened to Coast City. And now, that had been disintegrated into oblivion.
In anger, she crushed the bottle with her hand, spraying water all over the table and the floor.
“Shit!” Vanessa stood up, finally realizing her mistake. “I am sorry!”
“Oh, it's fine!” Tanya ran to the kitchen to grab some paper towels. “It’s just water.”
“I know it’s just…” Taking the paper towel, the two began wiping the floor and the table. “I have a lot on my mind.”
“I’ll bet with everything that happened,” said Tanya, giving Vanessa a supportive smile. “Your friends are getting hurt, and you can’t do anything but watch. It would piss anyone off. I know it did with me when the RedCent guys invaded EE Tower.”
“Yeah…” Vanessa sat back on the sofa. “But this… I not only possibly lost many friends, but I was betrayed by someone I loved, someone who I thought was the one for me…” she said, distraught, as tears ran down her face.
Tanya, without saying anything more, hugged Vanessa closely. Despite them knowing each other for only a few hours, Tanya knew that Vanessa was in pain. Watching her loved ones being hurt by someone that she trusted must have been a hard truth to accept.
The doors upstairs opening and closing caught the two’s attention. Looking up, they saw Somya Spears descending, looking exhausted, like she had gone ten rounds in the ring. As she reached the ground floor, Tanya ran up to her mother, hugged her close, and guided her to the nearest chair to rest.
“Is everything alright, mom?” Tanya asked, worried.
“Yeah… just felt that I might take that long overdue vacation…” Somya answered, leaning against the soft chair with a tired sigh. “Maybe we’ll go to Paris like you wanted, Tanya…”
More steps followed, and Ares, or Mars as he insisted to be called, followed Somya, pulling his folded-up sleeves back. Unlike Somya, he didn’t seem any different from when he went upstairs to help the Sandsmarks, but the few strands of hair on his face told a different story.
“How are they?” Vanessa asked, walking up to the former God of War. “Are they ok?”
Ares turned to Vanessa. “The girl has a lot of heart, far too stubborn to let a beating keep her down.” He said with praise, impressed with the former Wonder Girl’s willpower. “Her Sumerian blood will help her heal in only a few days, but it won’t help her mental wounds after I told her the news about her mother.”
Vanessa had a lot of questions about what he had said, especially the word Sumerian; perhaps Cassie was not simply half-Olympian. However, she focused on the most important detail in his explanation. “What happened with Helena?” She asked in a worried tone. “Is she-”
“She is alive,” Ares said, but his expression shifted, frowning, making her nervous. “Physically, she will recover, she has only a few cuts and bruises. Even a human like her can heal those.”
“But?”
“But it's the spell Circe struck her with. It is unlike anything I’ve seen because it is of her creation,” Ares explained, and Vanessa ground her teeth together when she heard the name belonging to the stranger who hurt her and her loved ones. “Whatever she used, it is affecting her very soul, slowly killing her.”
“Like a virus?” Vanessa asked, and Ares nodded. “Magic can do that?”
“It does,” Ares answered. “Magic can create a nuclear bomb if the user has the patience for it. And Circe is a master at it, one of the very best and most gifted witches on the planet, so making something like this would be as easy as making a cake for her.”
Magic had never been SCYTHE’s priority, but the Commander still made them study anything related to the subject in case they had to face it. Vanessa had never expected to see it at this scale.
“Can you break it?” Vanessa asked. “Find a way to break the curse from Helena’s soul?”
Ares took a deep breath, pocketing his hands. “It’s too complex to break. I will admit Magic is not my strongest suit, but even if you bring in someone knowledgeable, it would be a while for them to break her creation,” he explained. “You need someone at her level of knowledge when it comes to magic, and I am not the best person to face her in that department.”
“Then we call for a specialist, anyone, really,” Vanessa said in desperation. “If this is like a virus, a curse, then we bring a surgeon to cut it out! Maybe Cassie can use her Justice Legion connection, or maybe you can call someone for a favor.”
Vanessa's desperation was clear. She was willing to call for the Justice Legion, the very people she swore to go against for their vigilantism, if it meant saving Helena Sandsmark, her promise be damned.
“The spell is growing far too rapidly. By the time you find someone, it will be far too late,” Ares said solemnly. “The only person in the world who can break the spell without any problem or fear of failsafe is Hecate, the Goddess of Magic. She was Circe’s mentor, and she taught her everything she could about magic. No matter how complex it is, Hecate would understand it.”
“She can help us?”
Ares shook his head. “No, she has no interest in helping the world unless it is connected to her directly, and even then, dealing with her is the worst-case scenario because there is a chance she’ll side with Circe before she even thinks of helping us.”
“So what now?” Vanessa asked, sounding defeated. “Just let Helena die? Let Cassie suffer? Let Circe win?!” she shouted angrily, finally addressing Circe by name. All of this explanation from Ares told her one thing: that the Witch had them beat, and they couldn’t do anything about it.
Ares didn’t react to her outburst, while the Spears looked worried. Tanya, for her part, tried to walk up to calm Vanessa, but the War God raised his hand to stop her, shaking his head and giving her the silent sign to let Vanessa be.
“There is one way: it will be quicker if we act fast enough, but it would take everything from all of us for it to happen,” Ares said, beginning his explanation. “There is a chain link connecting the spell, from the spell caster to Circe. This means it can be broken if we force Circe to release the chain connecting her to Helena…” he explained, letting his words be understood by the occupants in the room before finishing with one last note. “Killing Circe would also break the binding if she didn’t leave any contingencies.”
Vanessa gritted her teeth. “So we have to make her break the spell, and hopefully she doesn’t screw us over… or we kill her, and hopefully she still doesn’t screw us over even in death?” she asked, and Ares nodded. “What kind of person is willing to put in all that work? Just for revenge? On Diana, who is long gone?”
Ares shrugged and turned to the Spears, his gaze focused on Tanya, his daughter. Someone whom he never thought he would meet again was facing him, without knowledge of their blood relations.
“Possibly,” Ares answered, taking a step back. “But if there is one thing I know for sure, Circe does not put these kinds of bindings without any reason. Whatever that reason is involves Cassandra Sandsmark and whether she will choose to make Circe break the spell or kill her, tainting her forever.”
Silence came to the room, letting Ares’s words sink in for all occupants, which might have been the same words he said to the Sandsmarks.
*************************************************************
The room of Somya Spears was quiet, with the only sound being the breathing of Helena Sandsmark lying on the bed sleeping. The room was spacious, with an expensive queen-sized bed as expected from an interim CEO of one the largest companies in the world.
Seated a few feet away on a chair was Cassandra Sandsmark, dressed in fresh clothes given to her by Somya after throwing off the bloody tattered ones she had arrived in. Watching her mother closely, Cassandra’s mind was racing, especially after what Ares told her about the curse Circe placed on her mother, slowly destroying her soul bit by bit until she was nothing but a husk.
“Dammit!” In anger at their situation, she crushed the armchair, tearing its arm off like it was made of paper. If she was stronger, faster, and had the heart for it, she would have stopped the Witch, stopped her from hurting her city, the people of SCYTHE, and those caught in the crossfire, stopped her from hurting her mother…
She buried her face into her hands, tears running down her eyes as she despaired. Everything she worked on after Coast City evaporated was ground up under a very powerful enemy out for revenge.
Considering Circe’s ultimatum, her city could well be gone by the time this was over.
“Artemis… please be safe…” she whispered. She had nearly had a panic attack when she heard the news of the Amazon heading to SCYTHE HQ to stop the prison break, and then… nothing. No matter how many times she dialed her phone, there was no one answering, and she feared for the worst.
She heard her mother coughing, and Cassandra was quickly by her side. “Mom!” she called for her, holding her hand.
“Cassandra?...” Her mother said her name weakly. Her skin was becoming paler, a clear sign that the curse spell was working. “Are you… ok?”
“I’m fine, Mom,” Cassandra answered, covering the bandages hidden inside her clothes. “We’re safe. You’re safe.” she said, tightening both her hands around her mothers.
“Did you… break something?” She asked, looking at the chair behind her. “You shouldn’t be… doing that… we are guests…”
Cassandra laughed, her tears falling away. “Sorry… it’s just… it’s been a hell of a week…”
Helena touched her daughter’s cheek, noticing the bandage on it. “You’re… hurt…”
“It’s alright, Mom. Just a few bruises,” Cassandra assured. “You shouldn’t worry, you know I can take it…”
“I am your… mother, Cassandra,” Helena said, facing her daughter. “Demi-God or not… I will always be worried… scared for my little girl.”
Cassandra’s tears came back. Seeing her mother remain strong despite everything made her happy, and she was terrified of losing her.
“So… my soul is cursed?” Helena asked.
“You heard all that?”
“Can’t not… with all the swearing…” Helena noted, giving her daughter a small smile. “You shouldn’t swear at people, Cassandra, especially those who are trying to help.”
“I know, I know,” Cassandra said. She had gone off on Ares after he explained what happened to her mother, and she might have overreacted when she put all her anger on the former War God. “It’s just… I don’t want to lose you… not while we can fix this.”
Helena sat up on her bed, fully facing her daughter. “Which is why… I don’t want you to make the wrong choice.”
“I won’t,” Cassandra said with a low tone. “I will make Circe free you from this curse-”
“No, Cassandra,” Helena grabbed both of Cassandra’s hands with hers. “That is not what I meant…”
Cassandra raised her brows, confused. “Mom?”
“I heard everything… from Circe’s spell… how it works… and how it can be broken…” Helena said, shocking Cassandra. “I know you already decided what you feel you have to do.”
Cassandra didn’t answer, avoiding her mother’s disapproving gaze accusing her. Ares said the quickest way to break the binding and the spell was either by forcing Circe to break it herself or by killing her, severing the connection.
But if what Circe said was true, that Diana decided to kill her instead of making her surrender like everyone else who faced her, that means there was no chance the Witch would submit willingly. She would rather die than give the satisfaction of admitting defeat.
Which left only one solution where she could save her mother.
Helena sighed, knowing what decision her daughter might have made. She held her hand tightly and changed the subject. “I have to tell you something…”
“No, mom. You’re not giving me the ‘Dying Speech’, not while there is a chance we can save you-”
“It’s about your father,” Helena cut her off, shutting Cassandra up. “Your real father…”
Cassandra remembered Circe calling her Daughter of Enlil, not Zeus. Ares said he was a friend of her father, which confused her because Ares hated Zeus, so it wouldn’t make sense that he would help out even if they were his siblings.
Enlil…” Cassandra said the name aloud, and Helena’s eyes widened, her breath hitching when she heard the name. “Circe… she called me Daughter of Enlil… Child of the Sky...”
Helena took a deep breath, bringing her daughter closer. “Yes… that is true…” she began. “You are not Zeus’s daughter, Cassandra, nor you are an Olympian in any way… but you are in fact… Sumerian… Mesopotamian,” The elder Sandsmark brought her youngest closer and spoke carefully, as if worried that someone might hear them. “Your father is Enlil, the Sumerian God of Wind… and he was the kindest man I have ever known…”
From then on, Helena explained Cassandra’s origins as carefully as possible, pushing on even while the spell affected her. She explained how she met Enlil, a man with golden hair similar to Cassandra’s, who introduced himself as an expert in Mesopotamian history during an expedition in Iraq. They had become rivals at first due to their clashing personalities, but how that developed into respect, to eventually falling in love after a very lengthy adventure that sounded like the plot of The Mummy.
And that love resulted in Cassandra’s birth. He helped raise her with Helena for the first year and a half before he disappeared because he had Olympian enemies and had to leave them to keep them safe.
While she explained all this, Cassandra’s mind went to another piece of critical information. Her father’s true identity had never been the most important thing for her. But what made it important was what Circe told her about Diana’s true reason for coming to Gateway City. It wasn’t just settling in a ‘piss-end of a city’ the more she taught about it, the more she realized the terrifying truth behind her mentor’s reasoning for coming to the city.
Diana was sent to find Cassandra, a Sumerian Demi-God, the Olympians greatest enemy since the Titans, and eliminate her. The prophecy of the Godkiller that they had feared might have come from Cassandra, but all it did was start a long, personal, and bloody war between two women because of the gods' demands for blood.
And now, she, Artemis, and Gateway City suffered the consequences. Even after Diana’s death, Circe would not let her hatred for what had happened to her go, and if it meant destroying her mentor’s legacy, she would do it.
‘Diana…’ Cassandra thought in sadness.
*************************************************************
SCYTHE Sub Base - Industrial District:
“I am not sure how you were able to do it, but you somehow found an ever more depressing place than that HQ of yours. It makes the cell you put us in look like a five-star hotel room,” said one Pamela Isley, formerly Poison Ivy, seated in the middle of a large room behind a large table. Around her were what was left of the SCYTHE agents they had saved during the escape, all working to get the makeshift base they had hidden up and running.
Alexei Abramovici, the Bloodcrow of SCYTHE, glared at the former supervillain, not happy with her comment. He turned to one of his men and began barking orders, “You! Get the goddamn Black Room working! We are running blind here!”
‘Worker drones even without their Commander.’ Pamela looked on unimpressed at the agents. She had never been that sympathetic to the plight of cops getting killed, especially militarized ones. The once mighty and feared peacekeepers of Gateway, who went to war against all the crime syndicates and the Red Centipedes, were now a mere little squad that won’t be able to protect a mini-mart, let alone every escaped convict under the command of the White Magician.
“Man… the signal here sucks!” complained Miguel Barragan by her side, raising his phone and trying to catch any kind of signal. “Could barely talk to my boyfriend when I called him, and can’t connect to the internet,” he complained. He tried once again to call but he couldn’t find a signal. “Useless brick…”
“We are underground in a bunker previously owned by Neo-Nazis, Barragan,” Pamela noted. From what she had heard, this used to be an old RedCent hideout that SCYTHE took over after the war, using it as a smaller base in case of emergency. “Not receiving any signal is part of the appeal of the place.”
“Bunker, huh…” Miguel chuckled. The name Bunker reminded him of the super name that he picked out; the more time passed, the more convinced he was that it was the right one.
Pamela gave a confused look at his expression and shrugged it off. Turning to her right, she saw the silent Emily Sung staring off into the distance. Unlike Barragan, Emily had other matters on her mind. Whatever she sensed or saw back at SCYTHE HQ freaked her out, like seeing something she shouldn’t.
Just as Pamela was about to ask her how she was feeling, a knock on the large blast doors echoed around the base, loud enough for all to hear. Quickly, everyone felt tense, and the SCYTHE agents covered the door as Alexei signaled them to aim their weapons. After the news of the escaped convicts taking control of SCYTHE HQ and their equipment and weaponry, the agents knew that they were being haunted now by the convicts looking for revenge, so they were not taking any chances.
“Would you mind opening the door!” A familiar voice said behind the door, a voice Pamela recognized right away. “I have a bloody Amazon here, and I would like her off my fur!”
“Barbara?” Pamela realized.
“Minerva? As in the Cheetah?” Alexei asked, eyes narrowed with suspicion. “She could be working with them, with the White Magician.”
“She isn’t,” Pamela answered, glaring at the SCYTHE soldier for the accusation. “She would never ally with the psychos you had under lock and key.”
Alexei scoffed. “That woman got a cemetery filled with people who say otherwise, and she hurt the mother of someone I know.”
Before the two could argue, Miguel stood up and decided to take action. He extended his hand, forming a large arm construct from it, and grabbed the handle of the blast door. With one pull, he opened it wide. Barbara entered. Her feline form made some of the SCYTHE agents tense, and weapons were still trained on her.
“Quite the welcoming committee…” she noted in sarcasm. “Now, would you be dears and get this woman some help?” She adjusted the unconscious and bloody Artemis on her back. Her blood covered Barbara’s fur.
“Medic!” Alexei called for an agent nearby before turning to Miguel. “And you, don’t use your freaky powers until I order you to do so.”
“Sorry tin man, I don’t speak fascist,” Miguel responded with a smirk, and Alexei glared at him.
The medic quickly came to Barbara and guided her to a nearby makeshift hospital room, which had a bed and various equipment to help the SCYTHE wounded. Barbara went in haste, and gently, with the help of the medic, they placed the injured Amazon on the bed, her blood soaking the white sheets red.
“How the hell did you even find us?” Alexei asked as he and the others entered. “I made sure I covered all our steps.”
“You did,” Barbara noted, stepping back to let the medic check on Artemis. She turned to Alexei and pointed at her nose. “But one of you has a very special pheromone that I can smell for miles,” she said with a smile as she turned her gaze to Pamela. “Still with those rose scents around you.”
The redhead smiled. “Maybe it’s that mark you left on me.”
“More than you think, Pammy.”
“Christ…” the medic gasped, catching everyone’s attention. “How is she still alive? And how long has she been like this?” He asked, examining the injured Amazon.
Her armor was wholly wrecked, beyond repair. Her headpiece was half broken, and the gauntlets and braces on her arms and legs were dented and unusable. Her injuries were severe: open wounds, slash marks, and burn marks were all over her body, and judging from blows on her armor, she might have had a few broken bones as well.
“Didn’t bother to look at the time with some of the grunts that were sent after us,” Barbara answered, leaning on a nearby chair as fatigue finally set in for her. “But these Amazons are too stubborn to die, and I know that from experience…”
The number of times Barbara thought she had beaten Diana only for the Amazon to get back up and beat her back was many, and it frustrated the woman to no end, but now she couldn’t help but be in awe at the resilience of these warriors.
“Her Amazon gifts will heal her,” Barbara noted. “But I am not sure how long it will take…”
“I doubt it will take more than a few days at least…” the medic noted, bringing out some bandages and wrapping them around her arms. “She will need a miracle to even walk out of here on her own two feet.”
“Uhmm…” Everyone in the room turned to Emily Sung, who stood by the doorway. “I… I think I can help her heal faster.”
Barbara and the medic gave her an odd look. To better explain it, Emily brought her hands together, and a small flame began to form from her palm. However, they weren’t bright orange flames; they were blue flames, and they didn’t feel any heat from them.
“I developed this technique while training,” said Emily. “It's a fire spell that doesn’t burn, but it heals people. I first used it on Miguel when he hurt his hands, and it was instantaneous,” she explained, and Miguel showed his fully healed hand as if he was demonstrating it. “But this will be the first time I will heal someone with this severe of injuries…”
Pamela and Barbara looked at the blue flames with wide eyes. In Pamela’s case, she was told that Emily had powers, and from Miguel’s description, she had the power of all the elements. However, seeing it firsthand and feeling it from just that tiny flame made her sense there was power behind it, warmth, like the sun.
“Do it,” Barbara said, taking a step back. “At this point, if we need magic to get her back into the fight, we better get to it before we lose her for real.” She turned to the shocked medic. This was the first time he would ever see magic in play. “And you, guide her in whatever wounds need to be healed.”
The medic nodded. It was better than nothing. With his guidance and Miguel’s support by her side, Emily went to work to heal Wonder Woman, who was in a state of life and death if they didn’t work fast enough, all while Circe and her crew were out there terrorizing the city.
“What’s the news out there?” Alexei asked after the three left the infirmary room. “We are in the dark here, and I couldn’t radio in anyone with the pieces of junk we got. Not even my brother, who was trying to get as many agents as possible.”
“Brother?” Barbara asked before she realized who his brother was. Her expression became solemn. She remembered the Warhammer who stayed behind to slow Circe and her crew, giving Barbara a chance to escape with Artemis on her back. “The guy with the Hammer…”
Alexei furrowed his brows, noticing the change in her expression. “What happened to my brother?”
Barbara took a deep breath and began explaining everything that had happened: the White Magician’s true identity, her taking over SCYTHE HQ, her ultimatum to Wonder Girl, and finally, Anatoly Abromivici’s sacrifice to save them.
*************************************************************
Somewhere in Gateway…
With the loss of SCYTHE and their headquarters, the surviving agents didn’t have the necessary support from the intel agents in the Black Room to fight off against the newly revived Red Centipedes, now grown more powerful with the help of the escaped convicts, more than happy to exact revenge.
With the bridges closed off, SCYTHE’s weakened state, and Wonder Woman being presumed dead, the city had been thrown into chaos. Streets filled with criminals and looters taking full advantage of what had happened, stealing anything from everyone across the island.
Red Centipedes roamed the streets with military trucks, taken from SCYTHE after their HQ had fallen to the White Magician’s control, making full use of their hardware to hunt down any surviving agent, delivering the message that they were the new peacekeepers of Gateway.
“Let me go!”
A woman, a worker from Taco Whiz, was being dragged from the streets by a group of RedCent grunts. Taken into a nearby corner, the RedCent dropped the worker on the dirty ground. Their eyes had terrible intentions behind them.
“Come on, man,” one RedCent grunt said from behind to his buddy. “We are supposed to find those SCYTHE fuckers, not mess around.”
“You’re serious?” The buddy looked at his friend like he was crazy. “We’ve been locked for months in SCYTHE’s cells; we can have a few minutes of fun.”
“Please! Don’t do this!” The woman screamed, tears falling from her eyes, afraid of what they would do to her. She tried to stand up and run away but was quickly pushed back down on the pavement.
The RedCent approached the woman, who crawled away from them in fear. “Come on, girl, I just need to release all this stress after being locked up for so long!” He proclaimed, giving the woman a leery look before turning to his buddy. “Hey man, I can share! Maybe we can get someone else from the street-”
The RedCent stopped speaking, catching his breath for a moment after he saw his buddy lying on the ground face first, knocked out cold. Looking up, his eyes widened in shock when he saw the person standing before him. “You’re… you were supposed to be dead?!”
Covered in heavy bandages and wrecked NIGHT armor, and carrying a mace in his hand and a pissed-off look on his face, Commander Hector Hall stood before the RedCent grunt like a dark spectre coming back to life. Kicking the knocked-out buddy aside, the Commander looked between the grunt and the terrified woman before he hardened his glare at the RedCent.
“Stay back!” The RedCent grunt aimed his weapon, hands shaking in fear. “I said stay the fuck back-”
In a moment, Hall moved at such a speed he looked like a blur, cutting the distance between the two. With one swing of his mace, he smacked him squarely on the head, sending him to the ground.
Hall turned to the woman he saved, who looked at him in horror. “Go… get to safety…”
Without another word, the woman ran toward the exit and into the streets, away from the alley. Now alone with the two RedCents, Hall grabbed the knocked-out buddy and woke him up, making the man see the bandaged-up Hall looking down at him with hateful eyes.
“You… I want you to send your boss a message…” Hall began, making him face the Commander. “Tell the White Magician, Circe, that I am declaring war on her and on anyone who stands by her side.” He turned and walked up to the other grunt, who was crawling away from the Commander in fear, grabbing his bleeding head. He begged for his life, but Hall ignored his pleas. “And this, this is for my men that you Centipedes have killed…
He lifted his bloody mace and brought it down like a hammer on the begging Red Centipede as his buddy looked on in horror. He lifted it up once more to reveal the man’s head was crushed like a watermelon.
Commander Hector Hall was still alive, and as long as he was still breathing, SCYTHE would remain standing to fight against all threats against Gateway City.
*************************************************************

Wonder Women Vol 3.

Previous Issue <> Next Issue
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2024.05.16 08:32 johnchristeen Triphenyl Phosphate Production Cost Analysis Report Unveils Lucrative Insights for Industry Stakeholders

In the dynamic landscape of chemical manufacturing, informed decisions are pivotal for sustainable growth and profitability. Understanding the intricacies of production costs and market dynamics is imperative for businesses to stay ahead. With this ethos in mind, our latest Triphenyl Phosphate Production Cost Analysis Report emerges as a beacon of strategic insights for industry stakeholders.
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Product Definition

Triphenyl Phosphate, a versatile compound with multifaceted applications across various industries, has garnered significant attention in recent years. Our report elucidates the nuances of Triphenyl Phosphate production, encompassing its chemical composition, manufacturing processes, and end-user applications. This comprehensive product definition serves as a cornerstone for businesses seeking to navigate the competitive landscape effectively.

Market Drivers

In an era characterized by rapid technological advancements and evolving regulatory landscapes, understanding the market drivers is paramount. Our analysis identifies key factors driving the demand for Triphenyl Phosphate, ranging from its widespread usage as a flame retardant in plastics to its role as a crucial component in lubricants and hydraulic fluids. By dissecting market trends and consumer preferences, we empower businesses to capitalize on emerging opportunities and mitigate potential risks effectively.

Raw Materials Requirements

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In the pursuit of operational excellence, understanding the cost dynamics and key process information is indispensable. Our analysis delves into the intricacies of Triphenyl Phosphate production costs, encompassing both fixed and variable expenses. From energy consumption to labor costs, we provide a comprehensive breakdown of cost components, enabling businesses to identify areas for optimization and efficiency enhancement.

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2024.05.16 08:26 Dr_FragHead The essence of the earth, echoing the lush valleys where it thrives. Hatian vetiver, a comprehensive review 👇🏼.

The essence of the earth, echoing the lush valleys where it thrives. Hatian vetiver, a comprehensive review 👇🏼.
(Pc: I’m extremely happy how this turned out)
⭕️ It is a grassy perennial crop native to India, Asia, Africa, Haiti, Java , Guatemala & Réunion etc. The botanical name of vetiver is Chrysopogon zizanioides (previously known as Vetivera zizanioides) .
⭕️ In India the extracted oil is called Ruh khus The oil extracted from the root of vetiver plant. Traditionally extracted by hydro distillation method, using copper vessels (getting its signature grassy green colour). Ruh Khus is extracted in 2 major regions in North India (Kannauj & Aligarh). In South India majorly in (Hydrabad, Bangalore, Mettupalayam & Kundapura).
⭕️ Similarly there are other types of vetiver oils from different regions of the world. With differences scent profiles, resultant of the natural variations in the Geographical location & the conditions (*) they grow in.
(*)—explained in further detail.
###Skip to “FRAGRANCE PROFILE” if not curious

Conditons(*)

☑️ Which includes variety of factors like climate, metal content in soil, water & soil reclamation, Period of cultivation, Pest control, Disease control & Processing of the yield.
☑️ Even after the extraction there are huge number of Physical & Chemical factors affect the nature of smell of the extracts.

Physical factors

No need to explain this in a detailed manner, available of the manpower, availability of the resources, functionality of the extraction plants & a lot more. 👉🏻 You get the point right👈🏻.

Chemical Factors

✨ Believe it or not, Vetiver oil is not a homogeneous single substance, it has a list of 63 chemical components & their isomers, giving the colour, smell, texture of the oil.
✨ Out of which the most the major components of vetiver oil were Valerenol, Beta- Vatirenene, Longiverbenone, Germacene D & more. These are the components that present in highest concentrations.
✨ However the olfactory contribution to the vetiver oil is by other compounds like
  • [x] α‐Vetivone ,
  • [x] β‐vetivone,
  • [x] Nootkatone
  • [x] geosmin
  • [x] isovalencenol And a handful of other compounds. Variations in these compound can severely alter the fragrance of the vetiver oil.
✨To simply put, vetiver from different regions have different variations in these compounds resulting in variations in the odour profile. Hence there are a plethora of vetiver oils available in the market.
✨The major types globally well known vetiver oils types are:
  1. Bourbon Vetiver Oil (from Reunion Island)
  2. Haitian Vetiver Oil
  3. Javanese Vetiver Oil (from Indonesia)
  4. Indian Vetiver Oil
  5. Sri Lankan Vetiver Oil
  6. Thai Vetiver Oil
  7. Chinese Vetiver Oil
  8. Madagascar Vetiver oil & etc,

Hatian Vetiver

❌ The vetiver oil from Haiti, known for its clean & slight smokiness along with its characteristic earthy sweetness.
❌ The vetiver I’m using for reference is from Jashan Fragrances from an independent Indian Perfumer Mr.Piyush Kumbnani

Fragrance Profile

Colour: Translucent Caramel Brown colour.

Consistency: Thick oily but not syrupy, with very little stickiness.

Smell : Earthy & Woody

Notes : 100% Hatian Vetiver

How it smells?

🪵 This starts smokey & woody in the beginning, where the smokiness mellows down in few mins. The initial smokiness may off put some people.
🪵 The oil develops into more earthy characteristics & the woody characters gets more pronounced with time.
🪵 Within few mins the oil develops the characteristic “Damp Earth” smell. The oil has the tasteful rootiness that you get from our very own Indian Ruh Khus.
🪵 When the oil starts to dry-down, it is where oil’s playful nature expressed. Along with the woodiness & Earthy rootiness, there is an underlying creamy sweetness (very minimal but noticeable). This smells extremely clean & sophisticated.
🪵 In the far dry-down, only the woodiness & faint earthiness remains. [When I compare it with the far-dry down of multiple well known Ruh Khus, they reach a smokier dry down compared to Hatian vetiver].

Performance

Longevity

🌕🌕🌕🌖🌑

Projection

🌕🌕🌕🌘🌑

Compliment-factor

🌕🌕🌗🌑🌑
It lasts about 7–8hrs on skin & has a (tight—medium) bubble of projection. It is very pleasant to the nose, but still a polarising scent nonetheless, so I wouldn’t think any vetiver oil for that matter will be a compliment garner. But it will definitely appeal for those who know & appreciate vetiver.

When & Where, For Whom?

👉🏻This can be an all-seasoner, its fresh enough for the high heat summers, woody & smokey enough for it to cut through winters.
👉🏻Can be a daily to the office, its fresh, clean & soft. But there maybe a chance that you might annoy few noses, who love fresh designer-ish fragrances.
👉🏻This is masculine to my nose, of course it doesn’t mean women can wear it. But there are many other better options available, don’t trouble yourself with this one.

Verdict

🎖️This is cleaner & more woodier than Indian Khus. However Indian Khus is much more greener, both in terms of colour & fragrance.
🎖️This is comparatively bit sweeter than Indian Khus. But at the end of the day, it another vetiver oil. All vetiver has its innate mineral/metallic soil smell (some comprehend this as dirtiness), which is also present here. When I say this is cleaner vetiver (compared to Indian Khus).
🎖️The differences are too small to draw a distinct line saying which is better. But if you are already acquainted with ruh khus & want something bit more cleaner, can give this one a try.

TL;DR :

⭐️ This is an oil extracted from root of Hatian variety of vetiver plant. This smells masculine,

EARTHY(damp soil)+WOODY(root like)+SWEET (creamy woods)

⭐️ Lasts more than 6–7hrs, with moderate projection.
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2024.05.16 08:22 cryptusin Meet Prabesh Choudhary : India's Premier Cyber Security Specialist

In an era where digital threats are evolving at an unprecedented pace, having a robust cybersecurity strategy is paramount for businesses and individuals alike. India, with its burgeoning digital landscape, has witnessed a significant rise in cyber threats, necessitating the expertise of seasoned professionals in the field. One such expert who has emerged as a beacon of excellence in cyber security is Prabesh Choudhary. With a wealth of experience and a commitment to safeguarding digital environments, Prabesh Choudhary stands out as India's premier cyber security specialist.
A Distinguished Career in Cyber Security
Prabesh Choudhary's journey into the world of cyber security began with a passion for technology and a keen interest in understanding the intricacies of digital systems. His academic background is rooted in computer science and information technology, which provided a strong foundation for his career. Over the years, Prabesh has acquired numerous certifications and accolades, solidifying his position as a leading expert in the field.
His expertise spans a wide array of domains, including network security, ethical hacking, digital forensics, and cyber threat intelligence. Prabesh's comprehensive understanding of these areas allows him to provide holistic security solutions that address the multifaceted nature of modern cyber threats.
Services Offered
At the core of Prabesh Choudhary's practice is a commitment to offering top-notch cyber security services tailored to meet the specific needs of his clients. His services include:
Cyber Security Assessments: Prabesh conducts thorough assessments to identify vulnerabilities within an organization's digital infrastructure. This proactive approach helps in fortifying defenses before potential threats can exploit weaknesses.
Incident Response and Investigation: In the unfortunate event of a cyber attack, Prabesh leads rapid response teams to mitigate damage, investigate the breach, and develop strategies to prevent future incidents. His expertise in digital forensics plays a crucial role in uncovering the details of the attack and identifying the perpetrators.
Ethical Hacking: Utilizing his skills as a certified ethical hacker, Prabesh simulates cyber attacks to test the resilience of security systems. This process, known as penetration testing, is essential in uncovering hidden vulnerabilities and strengthening overall security measures.
Cyber Threat Intelligence: Staying ahead of potential threats requires continuous monitoring and analysis of the cyber landscape. Prabesh provides clients with actionable intelligence on emerging threats, enabling them to take preemptive measures.
Security Training and Awareness: Recognizing that human error is a significant factor in many security breaches, Prabesh offers training programs to educate employees and individuals on best practices for maintaining cyber hygiene.
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What sets Prabesh Choudhary apart is his unwavering commitment to excellence and a client-centric approach. He understands that each client has unique security needs and challenges, and he tailors his services accordingly. His dedication to staying abreast of the latest advancements in cyber security ensures that his clients benefit from cutting-edge solutions.
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Beyond his professional services, Prabesh is also a thought leader in the cyber security community. He regularly shares his insights through blogs, seminars, and workshops, contributing to the collective knowledge of the industry. His website, prabeshchoudhary.com, serves as a valuable resource for those seeking information on the latest trends and developments in cyber security.
Prabesh Choudhary's exemplary track record, comprehensive service offerings, and commitment to excellence make him India's premier choice for cyber security solutions. Whether you are an individual seeking to protect your personal information or a business aiming to secure your digital assets, Prabesh Choudhary is the trusted expert you need.
For more information, contact us at:
Email: [prabesh@cryptus.in](mailto:prabesh@cryptus.in)
Phone: +91-9582163345
Stay secure, stay informed, and stay ahead with Prabesh Choudhary.
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2024.05.16 08:09 TerribleSell2997 Disaster Management Market Increasing Demand, Growth Analysis and Future Outlook by 2031

~Disaster management market~ is anticipated to grow at a considerable CAGR of 9.2% during the forecast period (2023-2030). The growth can be attributed to the increasing frequency and intensity of natural disasters, such as hurricanes, floods, wildfires, and earthquakes, globally. According to the World Disaster Report (WDR), in 2022, IFRC has analysed comprehensive disaster data for 2020–2021. During this period, there were 710 disasters triggered by natural hazards. These led to fatalities of close to 30,000 people and affected over 220 million. In 2021 alone there were 378 disasters triggered by natural hazards.
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Through collaboration, the various departments involved in disaster risk management agree on organizational goals, processes, type, and level of participation. For Instance, in January 2022, Honeywell announced a strategic investment in RapidSOS, as well as technology integrations between the two companies that will further modernize and digitize the public safety communications process. RapidSOS is the emergency response data platform used by more than 5,200 emergency communications centers (ECCs) globally.
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· Market Coverage
· Market number available for – 2024-2031
· Base year- 2024
· Forecast period- 2024-2031
· Segment Covered- By Source, By Product Type, By Applications
· Competitive Landscape- Archer Daniels Midland Co., Ingredion Inc., Kerry Group Plc, Cargill
· Inc., and others
Market Segmentation
Global Disaster Management Market by Solutions
o Surveillance System
o Disaster Recovery Services
o Search and Rescue Equipment
o Situational Awareness Solution
o Incident Management Systems
o Early Warning Systems
o Others
Global Disaster Management Market by Communication Technology
o Emergency Response Radars
o First Responder Tools
o Satellite Phones
o Vehicle-Ready Gateways
o Others
Global Disaster Management Market by Application
o Natural Disasters
o Man-made Disasters
o Hybrid Disasters
Regional Analysis
o North America
o United States
o Canada
o Europe
o UK
o Germany
o Italy
o Spain
o France
o Rest of Europe
o Asia-Pacific
o China
o India
o Japan
o South Korea
o Rest of Asia-Pacific
o Rest of the World
Company Profiles
o Airgility Inc.
o Alertus Technologies LLC
o ESRI Inc.
o Flyability
o Frequentis AG
o IBM Corp.
o Intergraph Corp.
o Intermedix Corp. (R1 Company)
o Juvare, LLC
o Metric Stream
o Motorola Solutions, Inc.
o OnSolve
o Quantum-Systems
o RapidSOS
o Rockwell Collins Inc.
o Singlewire Software, LLC.
· Triton Systems, Inc
The Report Covers
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submitted by TerribleSell2997 to Nim2908 [link] [comments]


2024.05.16 08:02 RebootStoicism 6 Stoic Principles To Remember Being In Relationship

We often sacrifice much for those we cherish showing them how much we care but sometimes they disappoint Us by exploiting our kindness for their own gain. They might seem friendly when they need something but once they've gotten what they wanted they vanish like a bird in flight so how can we regain control of such situations.
Today we delve into nine crucial aspects of interaction between men and women drawing inspiration from the stoic philosophy that has withstood the test of time. By avoiding these nine actions we can swiftly notice positive changes in our relationships empowering ourselves in the process so if you are experiencing difficulties in your relationship take a seat open your minds and let's embark on this enlightening journey together.

Number 1 - Don't reshape your life to fit others

Imagine trying to build a puzzle with pieces that just don't fit together causing frustration and confusion at every turn that's what it feels like when you try to conform to others expectations, it's like Seneca said everywhere means nowhere, trying to do too much at once leaves you feeling lost and unsure of where you're headed instead of trying to blend in like a chameleon, it's time to stand out like a shining star in the night sky. Be proud of who you are and the things that make you different, don't let others dictate how you should live your life it's time to take control and walk your own path.
Remember your life is your own story to write not someone else's so let your true colors shine and paint the world with your authenticity and purpose.

Number 2 - Don't ruin your life by being too obsessed with someone

Don't let your life revolve solely around others like a satellite stuck in orbit. When you focus too much on someone else it's easy to lose sight of your own dream and what makes you special instead of nurturing your own goals and aspirations you find yourself constantly catering to their needs and desires neglecting your own thirst for fulfilment as the wise Marcus Aelius once said, nowhere can a man find a quieter or more untroubled retreat than in his own soul.
When you become too entangled in someone else's world it disrupts your balance casting you into the shadows and stripping away your sense of worth. Break free from their hold and stop being a mere satellite to their planet, your life isn't a supporting act in someone else's story.
You're the lead role the star of your own Journey, always remember that and never let anyone dim your brilliance.

Number 3 - Don't let anything harm your mental health or happiness

Prioritizing someone else's happiness over your own mental well-being is like giving away your flashlight in the dark leaving yourself stumbling and lost. When you neglect your own health to cater to someone else's needs you're essentially surrendering control of your own happiness instead of finding fulfilment, you end up in a cycle of trying to please them while your own spirit's plummet.
It's crucial to take a step back and reclaim ownership of your life. Your mental health and happiness are invaluable assets that shouldn't be compromised or traded away rather than playing a supporting role in someone else's narrative seize the spotlight and become the protagonist of your own story. Protect your inner peace and joy with unwavering determination strengthen your resilience and refuse to let anyone steal your happiness, your mind belongs to you alone and you have the power to shape your own destiny.

Number 4 - Don't push friends or family away for someone else

Don't keep your distance from your friends and family just because you're really into someone else, it's kind of like cutting off branches from the tree that's holding you up each friend and family member is like a branch that's always been there to help you, if you start pushing them away it's not just about losing friends, you're also weakening the support system that's been there for you.
Plato once said people are like dirt, they can either nourish you and help you grow as a person or they can stunt your growth and make you wilt and die.
When you isolate yourself from your loved ones just to seek approval from someone else you're picking a tough road, take the initiative to rekindle those significant relationships, nurture your support system your friends and family form an Irreplaceable Network serving as your bedrock and source of strength. Embrace the steadfast companions who have stood by you through thick and thin.

Number 5 - Don't invest too much time in them

Don't pour all your precious time into someone else's bottomless well of need, it's like tossing your most valuable asset into into a dark abyss. Each moment you devoted excessively to them is a moment of your life slipping away forever.
Time is your greatest treasure not a bargaining chip in someone else's endless demands as Seneca wisely observed it is not that we have a short time to live but that we waste a lot of it by surrendering all your time to someone else you're forfeiting the most vibrant moments of your existence.
Reclaim your time it belongs to you alone not to anyone else. Don't allow them to overshadow your entire life, seek equilibrium invest your time thoughtfully cherish it and allocated to endeavors that ignite your passion foster growth and bring you fulfilment, remember you wield authority over your own time don't fritter it away on someone who may not value its significance.

Number 6 - Don't reveal everything about your past especially the tough times

Revealing your entire past to someone is like unfolding every hidden aspect and challenge you've encountered. Your past especially the difficult aspects is deeply personal.
It's the narrative of your own Journey that helped you navigate through tough times, it's not something to divulge for others to take pleasure in or pass judgment on. Discussing all your past Secrets means you're revisiting old challenges. Now You're vulnerable to potential harm or exploitation, keep your secrets securely held within yourself not everyone deserves access to them. Only disclose what is necessary while safeguarding the core elements of your narrative.
This is what fortifies you and ensures your protection, don't relinquish your defenses to someone else, exercise caution in choosing whom to confide in. Your life story belongs exclusively to you, it's not for others to casually revel in.
submitted by RebootStoicism to StoicSupport [link] [comments]


2024.05.16 08:01 RebootStoicism 6 Stoic Principles To Remember Being In Relationship

We often sacrifice much for those we cherish showing them how much we care but sometimes they disappoint Us by exploiting our kindness for their own gain. They might seem friendly when they need something but once they've gotten what they wanted they vanish like a bird in flight so how can we regain control of such situations.
Today we delve into nine crucial aspects of interaction between men and women drawing inspiration from the stoic philosophy that has withstood the test of time. By avoiding these nine actions we can swiftly notice positive changes in our relationships empowering ourselves in the process so if you are experiencing difficulties in your relationship take a seat open your minds and let's embark on this enlightening journey together.

Number 1 - Don't reshape your life to fit others

Imagine trying to build a puzzle with pieces that just don't fit together causing frustration and confusion at every turn that's what it feels like when you try to conform to others expectations, it's like Seneca said everywhere means nowhere, trying to do too much at once leaves you feeling lost and unsure of where you're headed instead of trying to blend in like a chameleon, it's time to stand out like a shining star in the night sky. Be proud of who you are and the things that make you different, don't let others dictate how you should live your life it's time to take control and walk your own path.
Remember your life is your own story to write not someone else's so let your true colors shine and paint the world with your authenticity and purpose.

Number 2 - Don't ruin your life by being too obsessed with someone

Don't let your life revolve solely around others like a satellite stuck in orbit. When you focus too much on someone else it's easy to lose sight of your own dream and what makes you special instead of nurturing your own goals and aspirations you find yourself constantly catering to their needs and desires neglecting your own thirst for fulfilment as the wise Marcus Aelius once said, nowhere can a man find a quieter or more untroubled retreat than in his own soul.
When you become too entangled in someone else's world it disrupts your balance casting you into the shadows and stripping away your sense of worth. Break free from their hold and stop being a mere satellite to their planet, your life isn't a supporting act in someone else's story.
You're the lead role the star of your own Journey, always remember that and never let anyone dim your brilliance.

Number 3 - Don't let anything harm your mental health or happiness

Prioritizing someone else's happiness over your own mental well-being is like giving away your flashlight in the dark leaving yourself stumbling and lost. When you neglect your own health to cater to someone else's needs you're essentially surrendering control of your own happiness instead of finding fulfilment, you end up in a cycle of trying to please them while your own spirit's plummet.
It's crucial to take a step back and reclaim ownership of your life. Your mental health and happiness are invaluable assets that shouldn't be compromised or traded away rather than playing a supporting role in someone else's narrative seize the spotlight and become the protagonist of your own story. Protect your inner peace and joy with unwavering determination strengthen your resilience and refuse to let anyone steal your happiness, your mind belongs to you alone and you have the power to shape your own destiny.

Number 4 - Don't push friends or family away for someone else

Don't keep your distance from your friends and family just because you're really into someone else, it's kind of like cutting off branches from the tree that's holding you up each friend and family member is like a branch that's always been there to help you, if you start pushing them away it's not just about losing friends, you're also weakening the support system that's been there for you.
Plato once said people are like dirt, they can either nourish you and help you grow as a person or they can stunt your growth and make you wilt and die.
When you isolate yourself from your loved ones just to seek approval from someone else you're picking a tough road, take the initiative to rekindle those significant relationships, nurture your support system your friends and family form an Irreplaceable Network serving as your bedrock and source of strength. Embrace the steadfast companions who have stood by you through thick and thin.

Number 5 - Don't invest too much time in them

Don't pour all your precious time into someone else's bottomless well of need, it's like tossing your most valuable asset into into a dark abyss. Each moment you devoted excessively to them is a moment of your life slipping away forever.
Time is your greatest treasure not a bargaining chip in someone else's endless demands as Seneca wisely observed it is not that we have a short time to live but that we waste a lot of it by surrendering all your time to someone else you're forfeiting the most vibrant moments of your existence.
Reclaim your time it belongs to you alone not to anyone else. Don't allow them to overshadow your entire life, seek equilibrium invest your time thoughtfully cherish it and allocated to endeavors that ignite your passion foster growth and bring you fulfilment, remember you wield authority over your own time don't fritter it away on someone who may not value its significance.

Number 6 - Don't reveal everything about your past especially the tough times

Revealing your entire past to someone is like unfolding every hidden aspect and challenge you've encountered. Your past especially the difficult aspects is deeply personal.
It's the narrative of your own Journey that helped you navigate through tough times, it's not something to divulge for others to take pleasure in or pass judgment on. Discussing all your past Secrets means you're revisiting old challenges. Now You're vulnerable to potential harm or exploitation, keep your secrets securely held within yourself not everyone deserves access to them. Only disclose what is necessary while safeguarding the core elements of your narrative.
This is what fortifies you and ensures your protection, don't relinquish your defenses to someone else, exercise caution in choosing whom to confide in. Your life story belongs exclusively to you, it's not for others to casually revel in.
submitted by RebootStoicism to Stoic [link] [comments]


2024.05.16 08:00 RebootStoicism 6 Stoic Principles To Remember Being In Relationship

We often sacrifice much for those we cherish showing them how much we care but sometimes they disappoint Us by exploiting our kindness for their own gain. They might seem friendly when they need something but once they've gotten what they wanted they vanish like a bird in flight so how can we regain control of such situations.
Today we delve into nine crucial aspects of interaction between men and women drawing inspiration from the stoic philosophy that has withstood the test of time. By avoiding these nine actions we can swiftly notice positive changes in our relationships empowering ourselves in the process so if you are experiencing difficulties in your relationship take a seat open your minds and let's embark on this enlightening journey together.

Number 1 - Don't reshape your life to fit others

Imagine trying to build a puzzle with pieces that just don't fit together causing frustration and confusion at every turn that's what it feels like when you try to conform to others expectations, it's like Seneca said everywhere means nowhere, trying to do too much at once leaves you feeling lost and unsure of where you're headed instead of trying to blend in like a chameleon, it's time to stand out like a shining star in the night sky. Be proud of who you are and the things that make you different, don't let others dictate how you should live your life it's time to take control and walk your own path.
Remember your life is your own story to write not someone else's so let your true colors shine and paint the world with your authenticity and purpose.

Number 2 - Don't ruin your life by being too obsessed with someone

Don't let your life revolve solely around others like a satellite stuck in orbit. When you focus too much on someone else it's easy to lose sight of your own dream and what makes you special instead of nurturing your own goals and aspirations you find yourself constantly catering to their needs and desires neglecting your own thirst for fulfilment as the wise Marcus Aelius once said, nowhere can a man find a quieter or more untroubled retreat than in his own soul.
When you become too entangled in someone else's world it disrupts your balance casting you into the shadows and stripping away your sense of worth. Break free from their hold and stop being a mere satellite to their planet, your life isn't a supporting act in someone else's story.
You're the lead role the star of your own Journey, always remember that and never let anyone dim your brilliance.

Number 3 - Don't let anything harm your mental health or happiness

Prioritizing someone else's happiness over your own mental well-being is like giving away your flashlight in the dark leaving yourself stumbling and lost. When you neglect your own health to cater to someone else's needs you're essentially surrendering control of your own happiness instead of finding fulfilment, you end up in a cycle of trying to please them while your own spirit's plummet.
It's crucial to take a step back and reclaim ownership of your life. Your mental health and happiness are invaluable assets that shouldn't be compromised or traded away rather than playing a supporting role in someone else's narrative seize the spotlight and become the protagonist of your own story. Protect your inner peace and joy with unwavering determination strengthen your resilience and refuse to let anyone steal your happiness, your mind belongs to you alone and you have the power to shape your own destiny.

Number 4 - Don't push friends or family away for someone else

Don't keep your distance from your friends and family just because you're really into someone else, it's kind of like cutting off branches from the tree that's holding you up each friend and family member is like a branch that's always been there to help you, if you start pushing them away it's not just about losing friends, you're also weakening the support system that's been there for you.
Plato once said people are like dirt, they can either nourish you and help you grow as a person or they can stunt your growth and make you wilt and die.
When you isolate yourself from your loved ones just to seek approval from someone else you're picking a tough road, take the initiative to rekindle those significant relationships, nurture your support system your friends and family form an Irreplaceable Network serving as your bedrock and source of strength. Embrace the steadfast companions who have stood by you through thick and thin.

Number 5 - Don't invest too much time in them

Don't pour all your precious time into someone else's bottomless well of need, it's like tossing your most valuable asset into into a dark abyss. Each moment you devoted excessively to them is a moment of your life slipping away forever.
Time is your greatest treasure not a bargaining chip in someone else's endless demands as Seneca wisely observed it is not that we have a short time to live but that we waste a lot of it by surrendering all your time to someone else you're forfeiting the most vibrant moments of your existence.
Reclaim your time it belongs to you alone not to anyone else. Don't allow them to overshadow your entire life, seek equilibrium invest your time thoughtfully cherish it and allocated to endeavors that ignite your passion foster growth and bring you fulfilment, remember you wield authority over your own time don't fritter it away on someone who may not value its significance.

Number 6 - Don't reveal everything about your past especially the tough times

Revealing your entire past to someone is like unfolding every hidden aspect and challenge you've encountered. Your past especially the difficult aspects is deeply personal.
It's the narrative of your own Journey that helped you navigate through tough times, it's not something to divulge for others to take pleasure in or pass judgment on. Discussing all your past Secrets means you're revisiting old challenges. Now You're vulnerable to potential harm or exploitation, keep your secrets securely held within yourself not everyone deserves access to them. Only disclose what is necessary while safeguarding the core elements of your narrative.
This is what fortifies you and ensures your protection, don't relinquish your defenses to someone else, exercise caution in choosing whom to confide in. Your life story belongs exclusively to you, it's not for others to casually revel in.
submitted by RebootStoicism to Stoicism [link] [comments]


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