Hippie chick printable birthday invitation

Hello everyone
I (31F) and my husband (37M) have a 5yo son who is non-verbal autistic. Yesterday was my son's birthday and we decided to arrange a cookout with my SIL, which I absolutely adore, and her girlfriend. It's not the first time we got together, we've been doing this for two years now. The only difference was that my SIL's girlfriend brought the kid she is raising (6M) I'll call him Simon, for the first time.
She is not his biological mother. When Simon was 2yo he was taken away from his parents because his father was a dr*g addict and his mother a pr*stitute and the environment he was growing up in wasn't safe. As next of kin my SIL's girlfriend took him in, and has been caring for him since then.
Every time we would meet she would leave him at grandma's house but this time it was not possible. She told me that she explained to Simon that my son wasn't very good about sharing his toys and to behave in other people's houses.
All good for me, I put various toys in the living room and we went to the kitchen to prep the cake and the meat for the cookout. I was checking my son from time to time to see if he was okay and in the beginning, it was fine. Simon was playing with the toys and my son was watching cartoons unbothered.
Things just went downhill from there.
We caught Simon throwing toys at my son, with not enough force to hurt but enough to the point my son was getting annoyed. His "mother" told him to stop, and he did for a whole five minutes than when he thought we weren't looking he resumed. My son turned off the TV and retreated to another part of the living room, further from Simon.
Then Simon started going through drawers and boxes, I didn't get bothered because I figured a kid was probably going to look for more toys although there were enough already out. Then he tried to purposefully break my son's toys by trying to rip out the wheels and doors of the cars, and stomping on other toys. He got scolded and stopped.
My son's juice bottle fell onto the floor and spilled a little, Simon came to me to tattle on my son and suggest I should punish my son, I cleaned it but didn't punish my son and I could see the frustration on Simon's face. He tried to do this a few more times, with different things but I didn't punish my son (of course) and I could see the frustration growing on Simon's face.
Then it came the time to start cooking on the grill, we all went to the backyard and right away Simon asked to take my son's pedal tractor out of the little garage my husband built, I replied that it wasn't a good idea as we were cooking and going back and forth and it wouldn't have the space. He seemed to accept it until he was caught taking the tractor out of the garage, and when he was scolded for it he just tried to blame my son, that my son had told him to take the tractor out, my non-verbal son.
We gave him other toys to play with and it was all good, for a while. They played together for a good amount until my son went into the house to get other toys and Simon was putting a few toys on the step, I thought it was odd since he was further away from the step but when my son got out of the house I understood, the moment my son put his foot on the step he immediately slipped and fell.
At this point I was getting annoyed with Simon's behavior and so was my son, so much so that my son signaled he wanted to take a bath, I figured he wanted distance from Simon. I remember my SIL mentioning that Simon hates water and screams bloody murder every time he takes a bath.
I went to the bathroom and bathed my son but left a little water for him to play before getting out. I went real quick to the backyard to check on things and that's when I saw Simon sneak into the house. I went after him only to find him near the tub watching my son bathe. At this point, I felt really creeped out. I asked Simon to go to the backyard and closed the bathroom door staying with my son. Two minutes later the door opened, I thought it could be my SIL or her girlfriend to ask to use the bathroom or something but no, it was Simon, asking me to watch my son bathe, I said no and asked him to go to the backyard. He left but did it two more times.
I took my son out of the bath, dressed him, and left him to play in the living room while trying to contain Simon in the backyard. That's when my husband arrived home from work. We went inside, the food was ready and after a few minutes he went to kiss our son, that's when Simon grabbed my husband's hand and dragged him away to show him something in the kitchen (which ended up being nothing, and he met my husband two minutes before) just to get him away from our son.
My son has a piano that he doesn't share under any circumstance and it is stored in another room, my son went to play (smash random keys, I'm still trying to teach the little I know) and I followed him, not long after Simon was there too. My son was playing and Simon inserted himself, trying to play the piano. My son pushed him not enough for him to fall just so Simon couldn't reach the piano, and here comes the performance worthy of an Oscar, Simon started making some throat noises and saying in a chocked voice "he's chocking me" when I could clearly see my son's hand on his chest.
At this point, I was beyond annoyed and just turned off the piano and motioned for us to go into the kitchen. We ate and SIL's girlfriend was commenting on how little Simon had ate (he had been dismissed already and we were still eating). He comes back and asks in a demanding tone "When are we eating the cake? I'm hungry"
SIL's girlfriend felt embarrassed and apologized but I said it was okay, from this point on we just quickly lit up the candles and sang happy birthday, and then my husband who was at this point also getting annoyed at Simon's attitude just made up plans on the spot for us to take a walk after "such a big meal" and SIL started to grab her things to go home.
SIL's girlfriend came to talk to me and apologize for Simon's behavior, she told me that every day she is called to the school because of his behavior, for one thing or another. I suggested to her to get him a psychologist and she said he had regular appointments and she is now waiting for a psychiatrist appointment to get him assessed. I said it wasn't her fault, the feeling I had was that she is at her wit's end. We said goodbye and went our separate ways.
I don't want to put my son through all of this stress again but on the other hand, I don't want to stop inviting my SILs and girlfriend over for the things we used to do. How do I proceed from here? How do I ask SIL's girlfriend to stop bringing Simon? Should I even ask that? I feel I'm being unfair by asking this of her. Any advice?
Sorry for the long post!

Welcome to our first discussion of David Copperfield! This week, we will discuss Chapters 1-5. The Marginalia post is here. You can find the Schedule here. The discussion questions are below.
One reminder - although this is a classic novel that has been adapted many times over, please keep in mind that not everyone has read or watched already, so be mindful not to include anything that could be a hint or a spoiler for the rest of the book or for other media related to this novel! Please mark all spoilers not related to this section of the book using the format > ! Spoiler text here !< (without any spaces between the characters themselves or between the characters and the first and last words).
Links of Note:

• Goodreads page
• Storygraph page
• Rockingham Castle and Mr. & Mrs. Richard Watson: Dickens dedicated this novel to the Watsons (link has minor spoilers for Bleak House)
• A David Copperfield Map (zoom in to click on individual locations - beware of potential spoilers, though)
• Get your own Dickens character name! Use this automatic generator or go by your birthday.

Chapter Summaries:
Chapter 1 - I Am Born: David Copperfield launches into the retelling of his life story with that famous line that questions whether he or someone else will turn out to be the hero of his life…but we’ll just have to read the whole thing to find out! Immediately we are let in on the unusual circumstances of David’s birth, which is suffused with superstition, causing the town gossips to speculate wildly. He was born on a Friday night near midnight, which of course means that he’ll have an unlucky life and be visited by ghosts and spirits. (I mean, would this even be a Victorian novel without some ghosts? David assures us that he’s yet to be haunted, though.) He was also born with a caul (inside the amniotic sac) which means he’ll be safe from drowning. This is apparently such great news that they advertise the caul for sale after his birth, but only get one hit on Victorian Craigslist, so they hang onto it until they can put it up for a raffle several years later. David says he remembers that raffle and found it super weird to watch a piece of himself get sold off, which, fair! He does note that the old lady who won the caul died in bed and not by drowning, so I suppose it was worth it?
Anyway, back to David’s birth! His father had been dead for six months on the night of his birth, and his mother was a terrified teenager living alone with Peggoty, her servant-girl, so called because they share the same first name. One Friday afternoon in March, his mother was hanging out by the fire and pondering the likelihood of dying in childbirth, when a formidable woman named Betsey Trotwood showed up at her door. Miss Betsey was his father’s aunt and she loved Mr. Copperfield, but hated her abusive husband, who she paid off to go to India and leave her alone. It worked - he died there! On the night in question, Miss Betsey literally pokes her nose into Mrs. Copperfield’s window and then demands that the pregnant lady get up to let her in. Being a force of nature, she takes charge of the room right away, criticizing the Copperfields’ choice of home (a rookery with no birds?) and making somewhat disparaging remarks about Mrs. Copperfield’s history as an orphan and a nanny. She also declares that the baby will be a girl and demands to be the godmother and namesake so the new Betsey Trotwood (Copperfield) can undo all the mistakes of Great Aunt Betsey’s life. Mrs. Copperfield goes into labor and Miss Betsey stays by the fire, plugging up her ears with cotton. She spends some time mildly abusing Ham Peggoty (the servant’s nephew who was hanging around the house to carry emergency messages) and generally ignoring the doctor. Said doctor, Mr. Chillip, is a gentle man but speaks so slowly that Miss Betsey almost throttles him. When he congratulates her on the birth of a BOY, she smacks him upside the head with her bonnet and leaves immediately, never to darken the Copperfields’ door again! Welcome to the world, David!
Chapter 2 - I Observe: David Copperfield relates some of his early impressions of life: his memories of creepy pantries, stuffy parlors, boring church services, and a loving home. His mother is young and beautiful in these memories, and Peggoty is beautiful to him in her own way (though she insists she is not). One day, Davy's mom shows up with a stranger who walks her home and - gasp! - touches her hand! Davy immediately dislikes this black-bearded, dead-eyed interloper and Peggoty seems to like him even less. He falls asleep while his mother is swooning over her new admirer, but when he wakes up his mom and Peggoty are having a big fight. Peggoty says the new man is bad news and Mr. Copperfield would never approve, while Davy's mom says Peggoty is being unfair and heartless. When all she does is sacrifice for Davy, doesn't she deserve some attention and excitement?! All three of them end up crying, and things are never quite the same between the trio again.
Davy's mom continues to see this man, Mr. Murdstone, who rides up one day and invites Davy to take a little trip with him to see a yacht. Peggoty gets him ready in a huff, and you can just tell this is the Victorian era version of riding on the irresponsible boyfriend's motorcycle without a helmet. Davy gets to meet some friends of Mr. Murdstone and watch them do a bunch of paperwork on the yacht. They also make fun of him, comment on how hot his mom is, and make him drink brandy. Since Davy is a little kid, he thinks they're having a grand time. When he later tells his mom they complimented her looks, she is quite thrilled. And then a few months later, Peggoty invites Davy to go with her to visit her brother for a fortnight. She talks up the trip so Davy will be excited, but it's clear she's worried. Davy wonders how his mom will fare all alone, but Peggoty assures him she will stay with a neighbor. (Lies!) Mr. Murdstone is there to see them off and he has … opinions … about how emotional Davy's mom is during the goodbyes. I'm with Davy when he wonders why it's any of this guy's business in the first place. In retrospect, Davy reflects that he wishes he had known he was leaving something behind forever and he is glad that he and his mom had a touching moment full of love as his carriage pulled away.
Chapter 3 - I Have a Change: Davy endures a very boring journey across flat countryside towards the sea to get to Peggoty’s family in Yarmouth. When Davy complains, Peggoty defends her hometown, as a proud Yarmouth Bloater. (Here's some bonus reading: a Victorian-era article about bloaters.) Davy is won over when they reach the busy fishing town and he gets to see the Peggoty home: it is a boat that has been converted for living, and he thinks it is pretty perfect. It turns out to be a full house due to the generous nature of Mr. Peggoty (original Peggoty's brother). Just don't mention said generosity because it makes him super mad. Mr. Peggoty has taken in the orphaned children - Ham and Em'ly - of his drowned brothers, as well as Mrs. Gummidge, the widow of his fishing partner. Davy's fortnight with the Peggotys is full of happiness. He explores the seashore with Em'ly and falls in love with her. They bond over never knowing their dads, although Em'ly wishes she were a lady in the same class as Davy. Davy reflects that given what he knows of her future life, it might've been better if Em'ly drowned that day by the sea. Dark! Mrs. Gummidge often has melancholy moods where she cries all day and declares she has it worse than everyone else, but the family kindly chalks it up to mourning for her husband and assures her they don't want her to go off to the poorhouse and die.
As the visit draws to a close, Davy realizes he has quite forgotten to miss his home and becomes eager to see his mother and Blunderstone Rookery. Yet when they arrive, Peggoty pulls him into the kitchen nervously. She really botches the delivery of her big news because Davy first thinks his mother may have died and then, when she tells him he has a dad, imagines Mr. Copperfield may have risen from the dead. But she brings him to the parlor to greet his new step-dad: it's Mr. Murdstone, of course. Mr. Murdstone proves himself to be a real downer, kicking things off by correcting Davy's mom (who we discover is named Clara) for jumping up too enthusiastically at her son’s arrival. Davy sneaks away to find that his house has completely changed and the yard has acquired a mean, black dog that snaps at him.
Chapter 4 - I Fall Into Disgrace: Davy has fallen asleep crying after the discovery of his mother’s marriage, and when Clara and Peggoty wake him, his mom blames both Peggoty and Davy for his despair. Mr. Murdstone comes up and dismisses them both so he can be alone with Davy. He explains that if he had a stubborn animal, he’d beat it until it obeyed, strongly implying that Davy had better change his attitude or else. Things get pretty grim for Davy after this. He is kept isolated from both his family and neighborhood children. Mr. Murdstone’s sister, Jane, comes to live with them and immediately takes over Blunderstone. Clara is given no say in household matters: even the keys are kept by Miss Murdstone and, when Clara protests and weeps at being pushed aside, the Murdstones manipulate her into apologies and submission. When the family goes to church, Peggoty is no longer invited and the Murdstones keep Davy and his mother apart; Davy also notices that the family seems to be the subject of much whispering and staring from the community.
Davy’s days are miserable. He is often locked up alone in his room, where he loses himself in his father’s old stash of novels and uses this escape as a survival mechanism. (This collection of novels was taken straight from Dickens’ own childhood, according to his biographer John Forster.) When allowed out of his room, Davy endures lengthy, difficult lessons in the parlor. He suspects the lessons are meant as much to teach his mom the Murdstone tradition of firmness tyranny as they are to educate him. No matter how hard Davy tries, he cannot seem to remember the lessons under such severe supervision. Davy is belittled as stupid for his mistakes and boxed on the ears with his books by Mr. Murdstone. When Clara tries to help Davy at one point, Miss Murdstone catches her, and both Clara and Davy are in a good deal of trouble. Clara is chastised, Davy is removed from the room, and the next day’s lessons are overseen by Mr. Murdstone with a cane and switches. This goes about as well as you would imagine: in his terror, Davy makes more mistakes than ever and is dragged from the room by Mr. Murdstone. To her credit, Clara does protest and try to run after them (unsuccessfully). Mr. Murdstone wields his cane and switches, but Davy bites his hand in an attempt to wriggle away. He then beats Davy severely and leaves him locked in his room for five days. During his imprisonment, Davy sees only Miss Murdstone who brings him meager meals and allows him short walks in the garden each morning and family prayers in the evening, before locking him away again. At the end of this punishment, which feels like years to Davy, Peggoty sneaks to his room to whisper through the keyhole that he will be sent to boarding school in the morning. She tells him his mother isn’t very angry with him, only disappointed, and begs him to remember her and her love for him. She promises to look after Clara and they both vow to write to each other. Davy asks to be remembered to Em’ly and the other Peggotys.
The next morning, his mother expresses her disappointment in his behavior and her hope that boarding school will reform him; Davy seems to realize she has been coached to believe the worst of him. He chokes down a little breakfast before his coach arrives, and Clara steals one unsupervised moment with him to say goodbye affectionately. Then, they are parted, and Davy is on his way to boarding school. It’ll surely be a harmonious and supportive learning environment. Right? Right?!?
Chapter Five - I Am Sent Away From Home: Mr. Barkis, the carrier driving Davy on the first leg of his journey to school, pulls over not too far away from the house. Who should appear out of the bushes but Peggoty! She silently hugs Davy until she pops some buttons of her dress (one of which Davy keeps), hands him some cakes, and slips him a note from his mother that includes two half-crowns. Davy shares a pastry with Mr. Barkis, who asks a lot of questions about Peggoty’s relationship status and cooking skills. He asks Davy to write Mr. Barkis is willin’ in one of his letters to Peggoty, which Davy does at the next stop. As he waits in Yarmouth for the stagecoach to London, Davy eats lunch at a hotel restaurant where he is grifted by the waiter. This unscrupulous man tricks Davy into giving him his ale, most of his food, and some of his money. The rumor goes around that Davy has the appetite of a boa constrictor, making him too nervous to eat at the next stop for supper. Wedged between two men and with a woman’s luggage stuffed underneath him, Davy spends an uncomfortable night in the stagecoach as it approaches London. He finds it strange the next morning, after all the snoring and moaning he witnessed, that the adults insist they were unable to sleep a wink!
Upon arriving at the station in London, there is no one to collect him. Waiting in the office, Davy begins to worry that he will be turned out of the station at night, run out of money and starve, get lost walking home, or have to offer himself as a soldier or sailor (though he knows he is too small for that). Finally, a rather scrawny man - who Davy assumes is the Master of Salem House School - arrives and takes Davy the rest of the way. Weak from lack of food and sleep, Davy begs to stop so he can buy breakfast, and the man takes him to the home of a poor woman (presumably his mother) to cook the provisions they purchase. The man plays the flute very badly as Davy begins to eat, but soon Davy has fallen asleep. He wakes to hear comments of “delicious” which he assumes refers to the man’s music, but I bet indicates they were eating Davy’s breakfast. They continue on to Salem House, where a man with a wooden leg lets them in and throws old boots at Davy’s escort, who turns out to be Mr. Mell, an employee of Mr. Creakle, the school proprietor. Salem House is dilapidated, dirty, and deserted. Davy wonders where everyone is and Mr. Mell informs him that Davy has been sent to school during the holidays as punishment. Another punishment: Davy must wear a sign on his back identifying him as a biter, which makes him increasingly paranoid that someone is always behind him reading it. (Probably not.) He also worries that the students, whose names he can read carved in the doorpost, will all make fun of him for it when they return. (Probably true!) Mr. Mell, an odd man with various ticks, doesn’t pay much attention to Davy, but neither is he mean. We get another ominous reference to the future in that Davy says he dreads the return of boys like J. Steerforth and the presence of “the awful Mr. Creakle”.

Hey guys, I had posted here yesterday about how to say no to a family gathering my mom decided to arrange out of the blue. I am not on good terms with her, am waiting for some explanation of her poor behavior or something. I decided after she disrespected me last time I would no longer be seeking contact with her.
I finally mustered the courage to tell the group chat, “sorry guys I won’t be able to make it for this one, but will see you at blanks birthday soon. Have a good day!”
Now she’s calling me, messaged me on Facebook to call her back later, proceeded to face time my sister in law (I was here with them) mentioned how I didn’t answer her call and I must still be mad at her or something. Thank god my sister in law is so great at navigating the weirdness. She played it so cool giving my mom no feedback, love that. So my main issue right now is I do not wish to call my mom back. The last time we were on the phone together is what started my NC, from her screaming at me. Like lady you don’t deserve a phone call from me, because what, you don’t like my declining of the invitation- it’s all about her- she planned this- blah blah screw you today mom.

He likes to cannonball into pools filled with people and kids. Got so much water in my ear last time it left a painful ear infection and took a week for the water to come out.
He fucking dunked me in front of everyone at a pool party while I was in the pool helping our scared toddler. I did everything not to lose it and scream in front of kids and strangers. Yelled in the car and got yelled at and told he was sick and tired of my drama. That everyone thinks he’s such a great dad because he loudly complains that he’s the only dad in the pool. Gaslights me into “I was just playfully pulling you in. Your head didn’t go in the water” and basically blaming me for it. He got my contacts, hair, and makeup wet and got water in my ears because he turned me under the water after he dove and tackled me.
Besides having a history of being on dating apps, unsuccessfully scoring girls, going into therapy to “fix himself,” he is now really invested in our daughter’s friend from daycare’s mom’s sex life and has been telling me and the other moms at daycare how her ex cheated on him with the teacher at school and all the maybe real or not real drama that went on. We discussed this at length and I asked him to please not share our childrens location with her because she shared her ex tried to kill her, was hacking her phone and reading everything, and she was getting a restraining order on him while calling him names like a psychopath in texts with my husband. I asked him if he digested that and to please keep his word. He goes yeah yeah yeah I understand only to text her the screenshot of a birthday party and the address we would be at without bothering to tell me the next day. He casually brings it up in public and I ask him what the point in having a conversation about it was if he was going to blatantly ignore me right after. Like why talk and talk and talk about this girl and continue texting her our children’s location. Why can’t he call her and tell her the address or even mention it to me when he’s asking for the invite. He yells at me to not raise my voice in public and yells at me basically telling me I’m dramatic for taking the information he said seriously. Blames me for not texting her myself. I don’t know this girl.
Goes to the party and spreads more rumors about her with other moms. Dunks me while lying about it. A mom calls him dad of the year because he’s in the pool with kids. Meanwhile he has not had a real job, dropped the ball on making plans for the weekend so last minute I needed to book our hotel for us to even get to the bday party. He doesn’t pay for a single item all weekend, I take us out to dinner during the week and buy our groceries every week. Buy almost everything the kids need. He scowls at me when I ask him to purchase a hot dog or hamburger for me while I wait with our excited toddler. Such an amazing dad. I get the door slammed and yelled at for not wanting to be dunked and getting mad.
Our daughter’s first tooth and letter for the tooth fairy are under her pillow. He went out last night and was supposed to come back with a present for her, along with dinner. He came back and told me the store is closed. The one store down the road but he couldn’t bother to drive anywhere else where stores are open (maybe less than 10 minutes down the street). Such an amazing dad. He is having a lot of fun sharing his friend’s (the girl from daycare was dating his friend from home) personal details with literally anyone who will listen about how he sought prostitutes, did drugs, etc. I sit there and remind him I found screenshots of escorts on his phone also when we are alone. It’s like he enjoys smearing his name. I remind him the only difference, at least that I know of, are he actually didn’t succeed (most likely due to having no real job or money and not because of not trying). I’m tired of being the drama train and not everyone everywhere we go needs to know about their personal business. It seems super hypocritical coming from him.

I’m in my late 20s and my partner is 30M, his friends are 30-32M and their girlfriends/fiancees/wives are prob like 30+F. They were all a tight knit group until people started planning weddings and getting married etc. I get how that would just naturally change things and also just growing up and dynamics changing so I didnt think much of it. The ladies have always been a little “ladies who lunch” who wish so badly to be a country club trophy wife (but none of them are… and I thought well yes, a lot of us arent nor do all of us want to be??). They are very obsessed with keeping up with the jonses and do the whole “only hang with a group just one on one” thing which has always been odd to me bc its just hard to coordinate with like 3+ couples from a logistical standpoint! I find their conversations to be boring (always about people their wedding, husband, kid, house… how they want to be a SAHM but they cant so theyre upset about it, not being able to afford a house so asking husband to work harder lol, expensive memberships/vacations/purchases etc) just bullshit i dont liek to engage in. Im 28 (really not that much younger) and they always say “oh, youre so young you have time to figure it out” and I thought it was weird how that was “noticed” ?? They bore me and rub me the wrong way so I stopped going to events unless it was a big one like a wedding or my bf really wanted me to go with (he doesnt like the girls either so he usually goes to guys nights).
After I became disconnected, one of them literally made up rumors about me hahahaah and spread it and my bf shut it down and confirmed it was not true but I just laughed at how juvenile the situation was. They refuse to go to dinner with us but they only want 6 people to go on someones boat or 10 people to go to a birthday party where everyone pays for their own tab/services (bowling, golf, ticketed event). Another one tells me God wants me to have kids (gross) and how “your mind will change when youre older” ( HIGHLY doubt that a 2 year age cap would make that huge of a difference but okay).one couple joined a yacht club and invites people every weekend (and if you say no, they will ask someone else after 5 minutes haha) and they will not do anything other than the yacht club (maybe bc its pre paid?) or brunch at the country club. Not my scene and I get motion sickness and I hate golfing so I just dont go bc why would I waste my time and Energy haha and they decline dinner invitations. I get that we all work and are busy and are looking to try to save money in this economy. They then complain they cannot afford to buy a house bu then the wife will say “oh but you know we’ve been working with loan office and realtor and” and its like okay but its been 2 years of this just dont even bring it up if you cant afford right now bc most of us cannot? Then she will say they found a bigger and nicer home to rent for 4000$ (WTF more than a mortgage!). Like an hour outside the city we live in (fine but dont tell me you flush 4k down the toilet every month and cry about the country club and no house. She will say snarky things to her husband if he says they are saving money and say “but you have to pick ONE country club for us still” and it makes me so uncomfortable bu also I judge them for over sharing haha My bf said he thinks that the girls are offended I dont take interest to their invites and what they have and he thought it was funny. It is funny but also kind of a wtf moment
I do not think I’m better than them but I realize how different we are? We all legit grew up in the same county, went to a network of private schools, and this area is very affluent and our parents worked HARD but no one is really the 1% in the group. I moved home with my family bc I was in grad school last year and I am a nurse so I’m literally busy dealing with other people’s crap/personal problems all week so I dont have time to deal with other people’s personal crap on my off days. They’re so appalled that I work a job like that when they all work as well (respectfully, we all work in traditionally pink collar woman jobs like I’m a nurse, the others are admin assistants and teachers so its not like any of us are climbing the corporate ladder) I went to school out of state so I have a lot of wonderful friends who live all around the east coast so they visit here or i sometimes visit them. My job, friend group, is completely different from all of theirs and they all went to school in state and never left. Our lifestyles are different, and im focused on career right now and not marriage and boat/countryclub/vacation/designer bags at this moment. A few of them are genuinely really nice and some are fun at times but in small doses. The yacht girl had an accident and needed urgent surgery on her arm so i reached out and offered to drop off groceries or meal prep company since they have food allergies inthe house and she responded as if she was offended “no its fine my husband just will buy us something every night bc we live new a lot of new restaurants now” HAHA
Not that I’m particularly pressed, I know they will prob stick around since we are talking about getting married. How do you respond to mean girls? Are they jealous? Do I continue to be unbothered? Do i reach out to show I dont hate them? Kill them with kindness? Fly under the radar? Clap back? I take it that mean girls don’t change after 30 either

I don’t really know how to word the title but essentially me F22 and my husband M24 have a 9 month old son. His birthday is coming up quick and last night I was making the guest list so I have all my ducks in a row come time to order invitations plus extra time in case I’d forgotten anyone. I know that my son won’t remember his birthday but honestly it’s super important to me since I have done 100% of the care for him in the last 9 months. I want a very sweet, intimate celebration of his 1st year of life with people who are important to our son and me/close family. I had asked my husband if I was missing anyone from his side of the family and he goes oh well if we’re buying a bunch of beer my friends will be there.
I immediately got irritated. I told him that this wasn’t a bro hang and I only want people who have relationships with our son/are actually interested in being involved in his life. And I know if my husbands friends come they’ll goof off separate from the rest of the party and not be apart of the party at all. I also told him that he has the rest of the year to go hang and drink with his friends so why does he have to do it then. And he got all pissed off and told me to cut the attitude. I tried telling him why I felt this way but he cut me off saying no no it was fine he just wouldn’t invite his friends. His friends are all in the stage of life where none of them have any serious life partners and have no interest in settling down anytime quick and none of them have even said a hello or interacted with our son more than twice ever.
TL;DR: my husband wants to invite his bros to our son’s first birthday party to drink and party when I want an intimate celebration focused on our son.

Backstory:
So, I had been seeing this girl for about 4 months friends for 2 months and dating for 2, good girl I've met in a fat while lol met her family and everything and she met mine. After Valentines the next week we have another small mini date were we went to the mall and gas station and went to a park in the afternoon. Next day she text and I text All fine. Like 4-5 days pass and we haven't texted or called and I wonder if she's ok? so I call her and doesn't answer that night. 2 hours later she posts she's overthinking and posting about it on Instagram notes. I texted her asking what was wrong, but she brushed it off, saying it was just a silly text, which I knew wasn't true. 2 days later I text her saying if she's eaten since she sometimes does eat cause of school and work are so close time wise and takes longer to respond than usual which I found odd.. but thought nothing of it. 3 days later she calls me to play Stardew valley so, we played Stardew Valley, and afterward, she posted again on IG, saying, "I just don't know anymore." I told her we needed to meet and talk but kinda said separate cars since idk why I had a bad feeling.
We met up and talked. At first, she tried to change the subject, but I persisted. Finally, she said she didn't know how if she could add me to her life because of school, family, and friends. It felt like she saw me as an obstacle so i asked and she said no and so I let her talk more. After hearing her talk I had to ask her how she'd feel if I just left or vanished, and she immediately said she wouldn't care, which stung. A few seconds later, she corrected herself, saying she would care. I asked if she wanted to continue what we had or just be friends. She implied friends with benefits, but I told her we would be just friends, nothing more, and she agreed. She also told me not to wait for her and mentioned that I shouldn't have left her alone for too long. She asked me to ignore any texts or calls from her later that night(got a can i take it back it was a mistake IG note that night). She also mentioned how she hoped it ended with like making out and stuff I think she meant make up but man after everything she said u know it hurt and to throw away the letter she gave me and (believe said delete pictures forgot). Despite everything, I gave her a birthday gift and a final kiss since her birthday was coming up. (Ended on good terms)
The next day, I couldn't get our conversation out of my head. It hurt, so I decided, with the help of God, to break it off. Something was telling me it was for the best. I told her I hoped she found someone who could truly make her happy and wished her the best. She cried and thanked me.
The next day, she sent me an apology, saying she didn't want me to deal with her bipolar disorder and her changing feelings about me every day. She said she wouldn't regret being with me and would respect it if I did not be friends and she truly still cares for me and maybe it was for the better. A few days later, I saw her IG notes saying how she hated being bipolar and how "love isn't real (for some)." It didn't make sense to me, but I ignored it. Also she said how shes cold now at night cause apparently she has no heater so I texted her saying if she wanted my jacket back since it was very wooly and told her I didn't want to to suffer in the cold for something trivial and she could have it. She replied no it's fine and it's mine anyways. So I left it at that
We became friends again a few days later inicated by me. She asked me to call her on IG notes. I said I would call at 10, and then she said she didn't want to hurt my feelings anymore. It seemed like she wanted to get something off her chest, but she said no not really. When I called, she hung up and told me to beg. I refused, and she responded by saying, "You're just so cute, I can't stay mad at you," and "your warmth is incomparable." I felt like I was being played with, so I ignored it.
We sent each other a few reels on Instagram, but at the end of the month, I went to the store where she works. I sort of ignored her because she looked busy handling pallets. She posted on IG, "Not even a hello???" I told her she looked busy. A few days later, I went back to the store for snacks for an upcoming road trip. She approached me to say hi, and we looked at each other awkwardly. Two guys started talking to me, and she walked away. When I was done I went looking for her at her department continue talking but she went in and then left kinda fast. Later, I texted her saying I wanted to say hi but those guys interrupted she asked if I had her phone number I said yea but told heridk wat to day to you anymore tho 💀 and so I asked if she wanted to continue playing Stardew Valley, but she said she was busy all day tomorrow so i left it at that. Then, she posted on IG, "I have a stalker," which felt like it was toward me
Idk what she wants
I waited until the next morning, still up so unfollowed her, and went on my trip. Two days later, she liked my pictures with me in it from the trip. And I'm so confused
We also talked about making it official and what not but she said it can't be in this specific month cause it's her birthday month which was kinda weird cause I haven't heard anyone say that but I said ok.. and then there was one instance where she said she can claim me as hers but I can't claim her as mine which made no sense she said it's a girl thing... Which was odd... But Thai was before the whole tip happened. There was a time she asked to come to my house and I told her yea one day I'll invite you

For context, about 10 years ago I worked a retail job for a few months and hit it off with a coworker. We never hung out outside of work but remained friends on Facebook for the last decade. She recently reached out to start hanging out because she’s going through a nasty divorce and needs a friend in the area.
I (26F) started hanging out with a “new” friend (28F) who has a child that’s the same age as my child. Both 4 yo girls. Our girls hit it off and usually enjoy playing together. However there is usually atleast 5 meltdowns per play date from friends daughter. Her meltdowns usually consist of screeching as loud as possible, sometimes saying things, sometimes she hits and kicks, always screaming. Over anything really she has a meltdown, some of it appears like it could be sensory issues but quite frankly it usually seems like she’s just being a brat. Friend doesn’t seem to know how to navigate or help her daughter through these meltdowns which seems to just drag it out.
Both of our daughters have birthdays this month. So friend invited our family to join them for a little birthday trip into the city to the museum. I was nervous, but I thought she knew her child well enough to plan an appropriate activity. The train ride into the city her daughter just stared out the window silently ignoring anyone that tried to engage. I moved my daughter over to our seat bc she was getting upset that her friend was ignoring her. The museum made me miss the silence of the train. Friends daughter was terrified of EVERYTHING in the museum. The dim lights, the artifacts on display, the museum workers trying to talk, I mean EVERYTHING. Her mom was basically sprinting through the exhibits bc she was screaming. The whole time her mom keeps asking me what I would do right now. I keep telling her to take her somewhere to calm down. After about an hour of her screeching her way around the museum I was just so overstimulated that I suggested we leave. It was clear that the screaming was not going to stop. As we step outside I go to check the train schedule and realize there’s three hours until the next train. We literally just fucked off outside the museum for three hours bc we couldn’t go anywhere or do anything without this kid screaming. It was honestly a nightmare of a day.
In the past month or two that we’ve been hanging out friend has asked for a lot of parenting and life advice. I’m wondering if it would be appropriate to tell her her child needs help? She very obviously needs play and behavioral therapy but I’m scared to tell her and get told off.

My son is turning 4 in August and wants to do a canaba rental at hershey for his birthday an invite a few family members. I've never rented one before and was wondering if they're worth it, do season pass holders get a discount and how quickly do they get booked? Planning on going on a random Tuesday mid to late August.

I hate Beverley with a passion. I want to know what could be the scientific justification for her hating her eldest son so much. For instance, she invited her other two children to her 60th birthday along with Sheldon but didn't invite Leonard. Was it simply because she deemed him less successful than her other two children, like she has some level of acceptance and even affection for them or it goes back even earlier and had post-partum depression or she was just a genuine A-hole?

I don't necessarily like venting to my family or the little friends I have anymore about this since I don't want them to know how weak of a person I am because this breakup killed me back when it first happened. This all basically starts in 2019, I had just graduated highschool, started college in the fall and was heading into 3 years of being with my at the time highschool bf, now ex, and things were kind of weird. Maybe it was the high emotions of being launched into adulthood or maybe I was going insane who knows, either way I started getting really depressed that summer. So many things were happening all at the same time like my cat dying/running away, losing friends, health issues, etc. and it felt like the order of my world was crashing down. I felt crazy because I also felt like a child with so much on my plate and to be quite honest I still do. I loved my ex boyfriend I really did and I still have some love for him present day but we had already had some tensions built up from previous matters that I started just piling and piling up in my head and there was only so much more I could take honestly. The first time he really broke a piece of me was when I had to go to a scholarship acceptance banquet and they completely fucked me over so I left crying and since I went there expecting to eat I left hungry so I went to get food and drove to see him after his shift and we ate in my car or more like he ate in my car while I cried and he kind of listened because in the middle of ranting he turned up the music in the car because "it was a good song", mind you I was still crying. After this anything he did that slightly pissed me off started getting added into my pile of grievances. Also in my eyes after we graduated from Highschool he did start to seem distant at times, one of the habits he grew was constantly being on his phone while on dates, sometimes even texting a girl I told him to block because I felt insecure. I know what you are probably thinking, another girl that just won't let her boyfriend have a chick friend. You know yea basically but one thing that got me really insecure is he would constantly play games with girls and be all chummy with them but when I asked to play it was always "maybe later" and well later never came except for one time when he asked me to play minecraft with him so I bought minecraft just to play,even though I know it gives me severe motion sickness, and we played for maybe 30 minutes until he was tired left and we never played again even when I asked for it. After a couple more incidents of him just not caring about my feelings I won't lie my eyes did start to wander off of him a little, I never acted on this because this really scared me due to being with my ex for so long and only knowing him and all I could think of was how could I possibly be so cruel and just leave him like that, so I continued to stay and at this time I still had the motivation to work things out. A couple months pass and I am still pretty depressed and suddenly I start having this feeling of no emotion at all. I feel like maybe this is what some might call desensitization but I haven't looked into it all that much. I felt like I couldn't feel happiness, sadness, anger, anxiety, basically any emotion I had ever encountered was now gone out of nowhere even love was gone. This loss of emotion affected everyone around me not just my ex, I literally didn't even love my parents, that is how bad it was. Our anniversary passes and I'm going through out it but we make it to 2020. Of course like most people this is where shit starts going south because well 2020 was the year of the pandemic. I'm in my second semester of freshman year and I'm still struggling internally without telling anyone about what I am going through mentally. Worst thing about this was that I could barely tell my ex about it because he in the past made fun of his best friend for having to be in a psych ward, which was another addition to the pile might I add. Due to the nature of him casting me and my emotions aside once the pandemic was in full swing I slowly implemented my way of casting him aside slowly but surely to give him a taste of his own medicine. Was this petty yea but did I do it... yea. So during the pandemic of course we would talk but I spent more time playing games, doing exercise/losing weight, and getting back into my hobbies. At this time I don't think it bothered him that much because I was still giving him his doses of attention and he was giving me mine so like whatever I suppose. But then at some point during this shift I remember being on snapchat after hours after he said he had gone to bed and checking where all my friends were on snapmaps, and thats when I see him in the middle of a parking lot alone around 2-3am in the morning. I start trying to make rational thoughts like maybe thats the last place he was when he opened snapchat before going home to bed so I just snap him out of curiosity and I can't remember what I said but it was something along the lines of "i cant sleep miss you send a pic" and he opens it right away and I really couldn't tell where he was in the picture. I open the snap map again and he's still in the parking lot and I ask him what he is doing and he just says trying to sleep. Obviously not.... To this day I don't know what was up with that, sometimes I want to think he was maybe getting weed or something late at night but lying to me because neither of us did substances of any kind at that time but I suspect he was cheating maybe. This was like a huge break in my sanity and after this I became even more distant and sometimes I wouldn't even text him during the day and sometimes he would do the same for me too. Something completely snapped in me a couple of weeks later and when he was hanging out with his friends I decided I needed to call a break. I think this is truly where I messed up and where things could've gone positively for me if I didn't do what I did next. We met up a day later and he was crying while I explained to him everything I had/was going through and how all the things he did were finally getting to me and I remember looking at him crying and feeling nothing but telling him it was a break and that I just needed time to think and that we would more than likely get back together. The beginning of this break was like heaven to me. I felt pure bliss and it felt like everything that was wrong had washed away in an instance. I remember sunbathing outside with my cousins maybe a day or two after that meet up and just being so happy about just breathing outside. I don't remember texting my ex that first week much as my dad had also gone through emergency surgery and I was dealing with that. Second week we started just checking up on eachother a little and third week I think is when we met up and I once again told him we would get back together soon and it didn't feel like a bad idea anymore to be honest. I genuinely think I just needed a little time and space. After that we saw eachother once a week and we'd just chill and talk and at some point we started getting physical with eachother again and genuinely I felt pretty good about getting back together this time around. One of the last times I spoke to him in a loving way I remember him not having his glasses on and telling him how glad I was to be able to see his eyes without glasses on and how pretty his green eyes were... Then the next week we broke up because I found him, in my opinion, emotionally cheating on me with someone over the internet, which he denied. The way I reacted to finding this out was crazy, I felt so insane and don't even understand all the things I said and did but I did them. I was pissed off at myself because there was no way I had let myself get vulnerable all over again with him and regaining my emotions just for him to fuck me over like that. I was utterly devastated, especially thinking that I couldve broken up with him and ended up emotionally okay but then I let him break up with me. This breakup was a huge rift in our circles, my friends hated him, his friends hated him and some of them even asked me out after this, which was weird and still is considering these people are still friends with him but I digress. Although at the time of our breakup he acted like there was potential for us dating again and how he would always have a place in his heart for me he actually moved on rather quickly to the person I caught him texting. Felt like I gave him so many chances but he gave me zero. If anyones gone through a breakup they know that deep sinking feeling straight in the chest. I felt that shit from June to November nonstop everyday. I was going insane being in my own body. I became anemic and developed an ED because of how little I was eating. My mom tells me about how when I slept in her and my dads room the first month she would watch me sleep because she could see how much of a toll the breakup took on me, she said it looked like my eyes had completely sunken in and that my collar bone looked like it was cutting through me. Basically I looked like a walking lifeless corpse was how bad I took it. I won't lie I stalked my ex hardcore the next couple months because I couldn't fathom him being so happy when I was in so much pain. Thankfully once my birthday arrived I didn't feel as bad anymore and I was able to celebrate with a smile on my face with my family. Once 2021 hit I vowed to let go and stop checking up on him and start living my life and it was honestly going really good... at first. Because once I stopped stalking him he decided to make multiple accounts to stalk me. I immediately knew it was him and I won't lie I entertained it, I enjoyed the attention I received from someone who now probably regretted his decision. I let it go on a little until I sabotaged it, because in my mind if I exposed him to his partner at the time maybe just maybe he would come back to me. WRONG COMPLETELY WRONG. He lied his way out of getting into trouble somehow after I confronted him and his partner at the time and it left me feeling more drained than ever. This time it started a downward spiral for me so bad that I had to start antidepressants and to this day I still take. Yet after all of this I still miss him. I know I am weak and stupid and everything else inbetween but that's just who I am. I hate myself for wasting my early twenties to being depressed over this but I can't do anything about it now. I've been single ever since and he's on his second partner now since me. I didn't start finding people attractive again until the middle of 2023 and since then I have entertained the idea of bumble and tinder but I cannot fathom it. I want an organic relationship with some new but sometimes I want lovers to enemies to lovers again with me ex idk. The only reason I'm venting about this was because I went on facebook and one of my friends memories had him in middle school in it and I lost it. Hope someone can be entertained by my stupid love story or maybe someone can feel not so alone in this evil love filled world.
also I kept some things out because I don't want to embarrass myself more than I already have

Sorry but I’m fuming. I’m so sick of it. Plz plz tell me if I’m in the wrong.
My (23F) boyfriend (23M) have been together for 5 years. His friends have gotten used to inviting me to their birthday celebrations, parties, vacations, etc.
But for some reason, my friends have not gotten used to that TO THIS DAY. It makes me so upset because he his friends always invite me out, but my friends NEVER do. I’ve received invited to 2 big graduation parties and 2 big birthday parties throughout the month, and nobody has told me to bring my boyfriend. What makes matters worse is that I know other people have received +1 invites to the birthday parties, given that they are closer with the birthday girls.
One thing to consider: his friends consist of one solid friend group. Nothing more, nothing less. So that’s the common etiquette that they’ve grown to understand all together. On the other hand, my friends are more scattered. I do not have a group. But, I do have a couple of best friends, along with several other friends.
And before anyone assumes that they don’t like my boyfriend, they like him. If they didn’t, I would know through hints, word of mouth, and even body language. Anytime they see him, they enjoy his company, and he’s always respectful/great to be around.
It’s been 5 years of this cycle, and I don’t know how to stop this cycle. Am I in the wrong?
Apologies if this came off strong. I’m very flustered.
TLDR: Why does my boyfriend of 5 years never get invited out to big parties/celebrations with my friends?

So, basically, I (16F) went to a graduation day for an English course I'm taking (English isn't my first language, me and 5 people from the course were invited to a pizzeria by our teacher to eat and get our diplomas). Some were dressed casually, some formally.
There were 2 problems: I wore socks that were too thick and I wore a black purse with white shoes. I had just gotten those white shoes, so I wanted to wear them for the first time and I like the purse cause of the way the chain is placed, so I can fidget with it when nervous or stressed.
I sent a picture to my grandma (66F) ( it was a group picture, so I was kinda zoomed out) because she likes receiving pictures and she told me off about the socks and told me I should've worn something more elegant. Point taken, I mildly rolled my eyes cause who receives a picture and inspects someone's socks, but whatever (She didn't see me rolling them cause it was over the phone)
Then my mom (45F) told me that I shouldn't have worn a black purse with white shoes. I told her calmly, but firmly that it's all subjective and that I simply liked those more. Again, for reference, there's a picture of my outfit. She told me that I was stubborn and I kept not being receptive and telling her it's subjective and I liked it and, according to her own sayings, black and white went with everything and no one else cared and she called me stupid and said I looked like a clown. This wasn't the first time she had done that (it was the second, the first was a month ago on her birthday when I wanted to wear a green blouse with blue trousers.), so I yelled at her that she should stop insulting me over something so inconsequential and that she was horrible and went to my room (I know, I'm dramatic, you'd suffer horrible punishments if you said that to your parents back in the day, I get it)
Then she called me and apologized for insulting me, but said I was too stubborn, so I told her "okay, let me go now" (in a fairly insolent tone). She also said I was being crazy and that I started it by being so stubborn and not receptive when she was just trying to give me advice and that I "didn't drink all the intelligence of the world at 16" (actual phrase in my language, don't know to translate it) She kept hugging me pretty firmly, I could've gotten out if I wanted to since I am physically stronger than her (I think so), but not without effort, but she let me go eventually.
I then got into my room and audibly cried (not on purpose, but living room and my room are pretty close), and she told me I was being dramatic and to come back out when I've calmed down. Mind you, not 15 minutes later, she was like "come back out, I'm not gonna wait the whole day", so I came back out and she apologized for insulting me and said it wasn't gonna happen again and asked me if I was gonna be this fussy the whole day.
Edit: sorry about my bad grammar, I was pretty distressed when I wrote this

My mother and boyfriend's birthday is tomorrow. And they are planning to celebrate it today, together with his family and ganun din kami. So supposedly, 5pm ang start ng celebration ng birthday ng bf ko. I am aware na magcecelebrate siya ng birthday niya ngayon since nakwento nya nga sakin dahil magkasama kami kahapon , but he didn't even invited me. Idk, wala naman issue sakin talaga kaso last night, he told me na his mother is inviting me and wants me to come so I agree (but also told him na icoconfirm ko pa talaga kasi baka biglang mag aya mother ko na umalis din ngayon). So ayun na nga, nag agree ako last night kasi nga his mother invited me. Kaso biglang nag aya na mother ko na mag celebrate ngayon so I told him na I'll check by 2pm kasi medyo indecisive pa mother ko. Dumating yung 2pm, biglang di na kami natuloy so I informed my boyfriend about it (actually i was hoping talaga na di matuloy yung sa mother ko kasi gusto ko makicelebrate sa bf ko and i even told my brother na bukas na I celebrate yung sa mother ko kasi nga pupunta ako sa bf ko). By 4 pm, I was all set, magbibihis na lang ako but I realized na my boyfriend didn't really invite me. Nagkwento lang sya na nagpprepare na sila para umalis, di man lang din ako tinanong kung asan na ako or kung papunta na ba ako, so that time sabi ko sa sarili ko parang di na pala ako pupunta kasi nawalan ako ng gana. I told him about it na baka hindi na ako tumuloy kasi nakakahiya kahit ang totoo is nagtatampo na ako na he didn't even ask me if makakapunta ba ako or whatsoever, his reply was just "ngi hahaha okay". Like??? hahahhaha idkkkkkkk i feel so petty rn na na ganito na ffeel ko hahahha. Siguro ano lang din ako kasi, pag sya naman, kahit sino sa fam ko na magccelebrate iniinvite ko sya kasi I wantvto make him feel na part sya ng family namin and also close rin naman sya sa mother ko and siblings ko. Minsan nga, sya na nagseself invite like pupunta n lng sya eh kahit pag namamasyal lang kami, although no problem naman dun.
So ayun lang, is it normal ba to feel this way? or ang petty ko na dahil dun, nagtatampo na ako?

"Kj ka naman kuya, " sabi nung party host kanina.
Pinilit ako sumama ng mga barkada sa celebration birthday party ng anak ng tropa pero I politely declined the invitation and stated na hindi ako masarap kasama sa mga big social gatherings; preferring intimate social bonding.
After some convincing---I inevitably agreed maski ayaw. Sunday kasi eh, mas masarap nalang mag-rest or mag gaming ng laro na binibli pero wala oras laruin during weekdays.
Nung dumating ako sa location---my goodness... the place was jammed to the walls. Chock-a-block sa pinaka likod maliban sa harapan. "May palaro siguro," bulong ko sa sarili. I proceeded to greet my pal and his wife, and wished a wonderful birthday to their kid whilst handing a sobre with P5,000.00 inside as a gift.
Ayun, sa harapan ako naka upo; mag-isa dahil yung mga ibang tropa ay may asawa at mga anak na kailangan nila samahan. Understandable, of course, pero eto na yung isa sa dahilan kung bakit di ko trip mga parties. Hindi bitter, pero ang lungkot wala kausap.
From time to time, may nakiki upo naman sa table kung saan ako naka upo para mga musta pero wala ako marinig sa sinasabi nila. Oo at galaw kilay nalang. Ang sound system ng party nagbubuga ng mga kantang maski ang bingi ay hindi magugustuhan.
Then, the dreaded voice sang, "get ready!"
Palaro muna bago kain. Una mga bata ay may palaro tas yung bring me something game. Going smoothly naman, sabi ko sa sarili..
"Kailangan ko ng tatlong lalake sa harapan," Oh no... walang may gustong tumayo at ako ang pinili since ako yung pinaka malapit. I tried to decline pero wala talaga.
Pinapasayaw kami at mag kembot sa harapan. Uupo lang daw yung sumayaw. Naka upo na yung iba until it was my turn. Nagbalik alaala ng elementary school na hindi ka makakaupo kapag di nakapag recitation. No amount of guts and instinct says that I should just do it. Alas, my body just does not want to do it.
"Kj ka kuya ah!" This is just the gist the statement.
"Sorry, ayaw ko talaga," and proceeded to exit the place while hearing whispers of contempt, and outside sprinted to my car and drove home.
Ngayon, iniisip ko kung ilang araw bago ko makalimutan tong memory na to. Most likely magiging core memory.
There's a choice to decide until the social democratic party says otherwise. Di ako nagtuturo ng daliri pero parang ang sama siguro ng isip nila saakin nung hindi ko pinagbigyan yung gusto nilang makita. My Day at TikTok/Instagram mga mata nila nung tumingin ako sa audience.
Wala naman ako ill intentions, pero sana nalang hindi ako napahiya or pinilit sumali sa pa games. Ang hirap makalimutan mga memories na nagmumulto. Pinili nalang sana yung willing. (T_T)
Alam ko na kj at unpleasant companion ako sa big and loud parties. Accept ko naman yung kasalanan. Sorry sa mga attendees for ruining the vibes.
Thank po sa nagbasa hanggang sa huli. Pang limang yosi ko na to habang nagta-type. Sorry po sa admins at members, di ko kasi alam kung sa Offmychest or adultingPH sub ko post to.

So, basically, I (16F) went to a graduation day for an English course I'm taking (English isn't my first language, me and 5 people from the course were invited to a pizzeria by our teacher to eat and get our diplomas). Some were dressed casually, some formally.
There were 2 problems: I wore socks that were too thick and I wore a black purse with white shoes. I had just gotten those white shoes, so I wanted to wear them for the first time and I like the purse cause of the way the chain is placed, so I can fidget with it when nervous or stressed.
I sent a picture to my grandma (66F) ( it was a group picture, so I was kinda zoomed out) because she likes receiving pictures and she told me off about the socks and told me I should've worn something more elegant. Point taken, I mildly rolled my eyes cause who receives a picture and inspects someone's socks, but whatever (She didn't see me rolling them cause it was over the phone)
Then my mom (45F) told me that I shouldn't have worn a black purse with white shoes. I told her calmly, but firmly that it's all subjective and that I simply liked those more. Again, for reference, there's a picture of my outfit. She told me that I was stubborn and I kept not being receptive and telling her it's subjective and I liked it and, according to her own sayings, black and white went with everything and no one else cared and she called me stupid and said I looked like a clown. This wasn't the first time she had done that (it was the second, the first was a month ago on her birthday when I wanted to wear a green blouse with blue trousers.), so I yelled at her that she should stop insulting me over something so inconsequential and that she was horrible and went to my room (I know, I'm dramatic, you'd suffer horrible punishments if you said that to your parents back in the day, I get it)
Then she called me and apologized for insulting me, but said I was too stubborn, so I told her "okay, let me go now" (in a fairly insolent tone). She also said I was being crazy and that I started it by being so stubborn and not receptive when she was just trying to give me advice and that I "didn't drink all the intelligence of the world at 16" (actual phrase in my language, don't know to translate it) She kept hugging me pretty firmly, I could've gotten out if I wanted to since I am physically stronger than her (I think so), but not without effort, but she let me go eventually.
I then got into my room and audibly cried (not on purpose, but living room and my room are pretty close), and she told me I was being dramatic and to come back out when I've calmed down. Mind you, not 15 minutes later, she was like "come back out, I'm not gonna wait the whole day", so I came back out and she apologized for insulting me and said it wasn't gonna happen again and asked me if I was gonna be this fussy the whole day.
Edit: sorry about my bad grammar, I was pretty distressed when I wrote this

Hey
So I’m a surgical nurse. Sometimes my schedule is awesome and sometimes it can get busy. It’s a part of the job haha.
Anyways,it haven’t really affected much about our relationship so far. I attend all her family events and gatherings I get invited to. And we spend a lot of time together during the week or weekend both. I always find time to be with her.
Now next weekend is her parents birthday party on Saturday. I’ve been working a lot these past two weeks but that’s mainly because I asked for a couple days off during that weekend and on Friday too so we can help with prep if needed.
Today I woke up to a call from my boss. My coworker’s mom suddenly died. I’m 28 this coworker is around 30. Her mom was still a young healthy woman. But they were out by a swimming pool and she had a heart attack if I understood it correctly. They did CPR on her with paramedics for an hour but unfortunately it didn’t help. My boss asked me to come in this Wednesday in stead of this coworker. I said yes of course that’s not an issue give her all the time she needs to grief. This coworker also has a Sunday shift. And I said in case no one can take that shift (we are seriously understaffed) I can come in but I’ll be after the party so maybe a bit tired hah. It could work, I’d just have to leave the party early which starts in the afternoon. Like I would leave around midnight to get a couple hours of sleep.
But since that call my gf was cold to me. Telling me there’s no way I’m taking Sunday shift etc. I tried to explain there’s only a very minimal chance I will have to. But in case I have to I will obviously cover for this person. This coworker is one of the few people that always helped me when I needed help.
Whole morning was terrible. She was angry and I told her she’s being selfish. That stuff like this happens and we need be at least a bit empathetic. Then she went off at me saying my boss isn’t stupid for doing what she can to keep me from leaving for a different hospital. Because I’m always ready to come in work and I’m always doing all the work that has to be done at work without complaining etc. Basically calling me a pushover. Which I’m very far from I’m pretty well respected by all the senior doctors because I speak my mind always and stand up for myself and others. After listening to this and arguing about me helping someone whose mom just died, I got angry too. Told her I got enough of this selfish behavior. This isn’t the first time she’s like this. For example we only been to two events on my family side. And both times I saw my brothers after a long time and we would be having fun and she’d keep hurrying me to go home. And then she would make a scene in front of my family because at 6 pm I wanted to stay an hour longer.
Then she went to leave my place. And so I just said okay I’m done dealing with this. And let her leave. I haven’t been responding to her texts since but she’s saying she feels like anything she does is always bad in my eyes etc. And I was just thinking, did I overreact?
TLDR: AITAH for calling her selfish after she got mad I said I will cover a shift for a coworker whose mom died unexpectedly ? Did I overreact?

tl;dr : husband wants me to stay home watching the kid while he goes for a fancy dinner out that his sister is paying for to thank us for hosting her. Plot twist: I am the one going out of my way and using my vacation time to do all the hosting.
Am I wrong to be upset over being excluded from a dinner out?
My husband and I are still married, live together and co-parent our kid. Our relationship has however run its course so we feel more like flatmates.
His sister and her friend are coming to visit from overseas. My husband is busy so I am the one using my vacation time to pick her up from the airport, showing her around, renting a car to drive them around, etc. At the same time I am the default parent of our kid and also have to do daycare drop-offs, pickups, take to appointments, organize 2 birthday parties, do the grocery shopping, etc.
The sister has invited us on a fancy dinner out to thank us for all the trouble.
My husband has made reservations only for 3: himself, his sister and the sister's friend. I didn't even have the chance to look for a babysitter. He informed me that, since I would get to enjoy his sister's company a lot more than him, he should have this dinner out alone with her (and her friend) to make up for working the rest of the time.
I am feeling upset because I haven't had a nice evening out in YEARS whereas he frequently has evenings and events out with his friends. It also feels unfair that I am going to be going through a lot of trouble (and using precious vacation time) for someone that I have never even met just to be excluded from the "thank you" dinner.
However: it is true that if I am there, they will also chat with me and will chat less with him + if we are no longer in a relationship (though we live together and co-parent and are married) should I really expect to be invited to any "family" events from his side of the family except as a mind-minder?

TL;DR: ive had a sudden realisation that me and my friends have a binge drinking problem and I want to find new friends
Hi people, while I’m not completely sober right now (as in I still have an occasional glass of wine) I think it’s definitely in my trajectory and something I want for myself. Here’s my longwinded vent but ultimately I have discovered that my closest girlfriends and I definitely have a binge drinking/bendering habit and I don’t want that for myself anymore.
I’m 29F. Over the last few months I’ve been drinking less and less. I was not an everyday drinker but whenever my friends (3-4 of them) and I would get together, we/ I would binge drink and do coke. This would happen about once a month. I now havent done it since April when one of my friends had a 30th birthday. That day/night was so full on that it sent me into the worst hangover of my entire life that lasted almost 2 weeks. I believe that is what traumatised me and gave me this realisation that I do not want that for myself anymore.
Anyway, last weekend one of our friends had a birthday party at a restaurant fairly far away. I opted to not drink so I drove these friends of mine down to the location for the afternoon. They drank all afternoon, champagne and cocktails and even in my car on the way there. I realised they left empty cans in my car too later in the week.
Fast forward to Friday that’s just been and my best friend invited me to an afternoon lunch for today with one of our other close friends. She said “the weather will be good so keen to have a few drinks in the sun”. I said no, because I wanted to spend time with family. I was just texted a photo of them together and they are out at another bar and they’ve been going for about 7 hours now. I’ve also noticed instead of going out and hard once a month it’s become an almost every weekend thing for them.
I’m not sure what I’m trying to get out of this but I guess I feel disappointed that these are my best friends and I’ve realised that all we do is drink together. No one ever has the idea to do something sober and wholesome. I also have a child, so the only time we’re really sober is if I offer for them to come over and see my kid and have dinner and watch movies.
On my path to sobriety I guess I need to find some new friends but I’m not sure how except through work. I’m a serious introvert… any tips and tricks welcome.