Hello, I'm a babybat and I'm still learning things about the bands' background and stuff. I'm sorry if someone would find this question weird or funny but recently Peter Murphy posted a pic with "congratulations tones on tail for reforming. Good luck" text on it and people started laughing and saying that he's dissing and stuff. I genuinely don't understand what's the matter with the text and why did everyone think it was so funny... Can someone explain what happened between Peter Murphy and Tones on Tail?

So I met this girl more than 2 weeks ago and weve been texting on snapchat , she always send full face pics and we est together at school sometime skip classes together and we reslly had deep emotional conversations and we send eschothers goodnight vocals were getting close even offered me to go out with her and her friends but she left me on delivered for a day and this happened 2 times already Im the kinda guy to overthink so It kinda affects me

Schools need to do better. America needs to do better with its schools. Schools need to prepare kids for the outside world. "But that should be the parents' job!" No duh! But not every kid has the advantage of parents who can or will teach them what they need to know. I never learned how to write a resume or what the fuck a cover letter was in school. My parents didn't know how to do that either for a first job in the US. They got their first jobs under a completely different system in a country that doesn't exist anymore! What about kids whose parents don't have time? Those who don't give a shit? Just fuck us I guess? Isn't this supposed to be the land of equal opportunity (What a joke, I know)? How is it remotely equal if we're not even starting from the same knowledge of navigating the real world?
You know what my school did teach me? What the teacher's guide said Holden's red fucking hunting hat represented in The Catcher in the Rye. The only time I have ever used that knowledge was in rants about how utterly pointless it was. It wasn't even teaching us to find symbolism in writing. It was just "This is what it means, memorize it, it's going to be on the test".
Speaking of memorization - schools only really teach one way. That way doesn't work with you? Tough shit. You're gonna learn less, get lower grades, which will impede on your future prospects, get stressed, deal with whatever at home consequences there are...just because you learn differently. I used to be pretty good at math till mid-middle school. It all clicked because the teachers in earlier grades explained the hows and the whys of concepts. Bobby bought a pizza and split it between himself and 5 of his friends. How much of the pizza does each person get? See? That's division. That's something I could visualize and process. Then it became "Here's a formula, memorize it". Any questions got dismissed. "Where is this used?" "On the test" "Why does this work?" "Here's another bare mathematical formula that explains it". After middle school, I started sucking at math. I hated math. It was nothing but stress because I couldn't understand anything and my capacity for rote memorization was pretty shoddy. Still do, but watching videos with explanations on the whys, hows and for whats have made it easier to understand and more interesting.
Speaking of schools not helping with learning - it's looking more and more like schools are more interested in looking good than doing good. I have a friend who fell behind on a subject because her teacher was shit. She went into the next grade behind. She got put on an Individual Learning Plan (IEP), but instead of helping her catch up, they just gave her busy work, gave her passing grades, and sent her on her way. She's had to play catchup on her own as an adult. I'm now a school substitute and I've watched kids today get the same treatment. English assignment? Just scribble something down in text speak and you'll pass. We aren't doing kids any favours by letting them breeze by on shitty work! This will bite them in the ass when they're older!
Don't get me started on parents who think their kids are precious little angels who can do no wrong, or royalty whose every whim needs to be pandered to. You are doing your kids no favours. No, it's not the teacher's fault if little Billy is failing class because he's never turned in any of his work.
Then there's the money problem. We need a better system. Tying school funding to local taxes is inherently unequal. It's saying that kids from poorer families don't deserve as good of an education because their parents are poor. Tying funding to headcount is more viable, but when the population goes down, it fucks over all the other students. Misuse of funds, corruption, etc, yeah, that's a thing. The district I work in is dealing with such an issue right now, which results in huge layoffs. Even so, the government bails out companies that mismanaged their resources! Why not schools? Schools take care of the future generation! If you want them to be more than just glorified daycare centers, they need money! Why are we punishing kids and teachers for the admins' fuckups?

Here are 100 Tips to Advance Spiritually on Your Recovery Journey

1. Start your day with prayer, asking God for strength and guidance.
2. Read the Bible daily, focusing on verses about healing and recovery.
3. Join a Christian recovery group where you can share your journey with others.
4. Memorize Scripture that speaks to overcoming temptation and maintaining faith.
5. Keep a journal of prayers, insights, and daily progress.
6. Attend church regularly to worship and connect with a faith community.
7. Practice gratitude by thanking God for three things every morning.
8. Offer your struggles to God in prayer, asking for His help to overcome them.
9. Serve others through volunteer work, which can shift focus from self to service.
10. Share your testimony with others to encourage them and strengthen your own faith.
11. Find a mentor or spiritual director who exemplifies Christian living.
12. Participate in Bible studies to deepen your understanding of the Scriptures.
13. Practice forgiveness, letting go of old grudges and asking for forgiveness from those you’ve hurt.
14. Avoid triggers and situations where you’re tempted to relapse.
15. Maintain healthy boundaries in personal and professional relationships.
16. Stay active to help manage stress and improve mental health.
17. Eat a balanced diet to help stabilize mood swings and improve overall health.
18. Get adequate sleep to ensure your mind and body are well-rested.
19. Practice humility by acknowledging your weaknesses and asking for help when needed.
20. Celebrate small victories in your recovery journey, recognizing God’s hand in each.
21. Seek professional counseling if you struggle with underlying issues contributing to addiction.
22. Pray for others facing similar struggles, which can deepen your empathy and connection.
23. Participate in retreats focused on spiritual growth and recovery.
24. Practice patience, recognizing that recovery is a journey, not a destination.
25. Engage in regular self-reflection to assess your growth and areas needing improvement.
26. Stay connected with supportive friends and family who encourage your recovery.
27. Use your experiences to advocate for recovery support in your community.
28. Develop a personal creed or statement of faith that you can turn to in times of temptation.
29. Learn to recognize God’s presence in everyday life and lean on Him during tough times.
30. Set realistic goals for your personal and spiritual growth.
31. Practice mindful meditation focused on biblical truths and God’s love.
32. Join a service project at church or a local charity.
33. Educate yourself about the physiological aspects of addiction to better understand your body’s reactions.
34. Encourage someone daily with a phone call, text, or email.
35. Make amends where possible, as part of your healing process.
36. Limit exposure to digital distractions to enhance your focus on recovery and spiritual growth.
37. Read Christian literature that supports recovery and spiritual well-being.
38. Create a peaceful home environment that supports your recovery.
39. Attend workshops or seminars on Christian living and addiction recovery.
40. Practice the art of listening to God and others, enhancing your empathy and understanding.
41. Engage in creative activities like writing, painting, or music that express your journey.
42. Develop a routine that includes time for work, rest, and spiritual practices.
43. Seek opportunities to share your skills and talents with your church or community.
44. Maintain a spirit of joy, finding reasons to smile and laugh each day.
45. Dress modestly and respectfully, reflecting your dignity as a child of God.
46. Be honest with yourself and others about your struggles and successes.
47. Respect your body as a temple of the Holy Spirit by avoiding substances that harm it.
48. Cultivate gentleness in your interactions with others.
49. Take responsibility for your actions and their impact on others.
50. Participate in community prayer groups or start one if none exists.
51. Commit to lifelong learning about your faith and how it relates to recovery.
52. Use technology for good, such as subscribing to Christian podcasts or recovery channels.
53. Support others in their recovery, offering your time and presence as a mentor.
54. Engage with nature, appreciating God’s creation as a source of peace.
55. Maintain a clean and orderly living space, which can improve your mental clarity and peace.
56. Honor your commitments to others, showing reliability and respect.
57. Seek silence regularly, allowing God to speak to your heart without interruption.
58. Pray before meals, thanking God for His provision.
59. Participate in fasting as a form of spiritual discipline and focus.
60. Practice saying “no” to non-essential demands that may lead to stress or temptation.
61. Develop financial discipline, using resources wisely and avoiding debt.
62. Attend a different community’s church service to experience the broader body of Christ.
63. Watch or listen to testimonies of other Christians who have overcome addiction.
64. Plan for challenging situations by having a strategy to maintain your sobriety.
65. Participate in communal worship, such as singing hymns or contemporary Christian music.
66. Adopt a spirit of perseverance, knowing that every day with God is a step toward recovery.
67. Educate others about addiction, breaking down stigma and spreading hope.
68. Take time off when needed to maintain your mental and spiritual health.
69. Pray with and for your family, strengthening bonds and spiritual connections.
70. Celebrate religious holidays with true spiritual fervor, focusing on their Christian significance.
71. Visit historical Christian sites or take pilgrimages to deepen your faith.
72. Incorporate Christian symbols in your home to remind you of your faith.
73. Give anonymously to those in need, practicing the gift of giving without recognition.
74. Join or form a support group specifically for Christian addicts in recovery.
75. Use Christian apps that provide daily scriptures and prayers.
76. Hold regular family devotions, integrating faith into your household’s routine.
77. Teach a Sunday school class or small group, sharing your knowledge and faith.
78. Partake in communion regularly, remembering Christ’s sacrifice and promise.
79. Invite friends to church or spiritual events, sharing your journey and community.
80. Maintain a prayer list, regularly updating and praying for the needs of others.
81. Reflect on the lives of saints and other Christian figures, drawing inspiration from their faith and perseverance.
82. Practice hospitality, opening your home to fellowship and community building.
83. Engage in spiritual warfare prayers, recognizing and combating the spiritual roots of addiction.
84. Forgive yourself and others, releasing bitterness and focusing on God’s mercy.
85. Decorate your living space with verses and Christian art, creating an environment of faith.
86. Observe a Sabbath rest, dedicating time each week to rest and spiritual renewal.
87. Speak words of affirmation and faith to yourself and others.
88. Consult with your pastor or spiritual leader regularly to stay on track.
89. Embrace modesty in thoughts, words, and actions, focusing on purity.
90. Conduct a weekly review of your spiritual and recovery progress.
91. Be proactive in your church community, taking part in its activities and outreach.
92. Learn to manage stress through faith-based practices like meditation and prayer.
93. Teach about addiction and recovery in your church, spreading awareness and support.
94. Maintain a balance between work, rest, and play to support your overall well-being.
95. Create a vision board that includes your spiritual goals and inspirations.
96. Participate in ecumenical gatherings, recognizing the unity of the broader Christian community.
97. Implement a “media fast” periodically to focus more on your spiritual life.
98. Pray for global issues and missions, broadening your spiritual concern beyond personal needs.
99. Set up a prayer corner or altar in your home, dedicating a space for spiritual reflection.
100. Routinely update your mentor or accountability partner about your progress and struggles.

Spiritual Growth

1. Daily Prayer: Commit to daily prayer sessions asking for strength and guidance.
2. Scripture Reading: Read and meditate on scriptures that focus on strength and recovery.
3. Worship: Participate in regular worship services to reinforce your spiritual foundation.
4. Faith Affirmations: Use Bible verses as affirmations; repeat them during cravings.
5. Confession: Regularly confess struggles to a trusted spiritual leader or trusted friend.
6. Fasting: Occasionally fast to seek clarity and reinforce spiritual discipline.
7. Spiritual Retreats: Attend retreats for focused spiritual renewal.
8. Christian Meditation: Practice Christian meditation (pondering scripture, etc.) to calm the mind and spirit.
9. Listening to Gospel Music: Use uplifting music to enhance spiritual connection.
10. Prayer Journaling: Keep a journal of prayers and God’s responses.

Community Engagement

1. Church Support Groups: Join groups for individuals struggling with addiction.
2. Accountability Partner: Partner with a fellow believer who can provide support and accountability.
3. Volunteering: Engage in church-related volunteer work to stay busy and inspired.
4. Christian Counseling: Seek professional counseling from a Christian perspective.
5. Family Involvement: Involve your family in your journey through church events.
6. Youth Mentorship: Mentor youth, sharing your experiences and learning from service.
7. Online Christian Communities: Participate in online forums or groups for spiritual support.
8. Testimony Sharing: Share your journey at church gatherings to inspire and receive support.
9. Bible Study Groups: Regularly attend Bible study to deepen faith and community ties.
10. Church Activities: Be an active participant in church events and functions.

Personal Development

1. Routine Exercise: Incorporate regular physical activity to reduce stress.
2. Healthy Diet: Maintain a nutritious diet to improve overall well-being.
3. Reading Christian Literature: Read books that encourage spiritual growth and recovery.
4. Creative Arts: Use arts like painting or writing to express feelings and reflect.
5. Time Management: Structure your day to minimize idle time that could lead to cravings.
6. Goal Setting: Set short and long-term goals that align with your spiritual values.
7. Learning New Skills: Take up hobbies or classes that keep you engaged and learning.
8. Rest and Sleep: Ensure sufficient rest to maintain physical and mental health.
9. Nature Walks: Spend time in nature to find peace and perspective.
10. Avoiding Triggers: Identify and avoid situations or people that trigger cravings.

Coping Techniques

1. Deep Breathing: Practice deep breathing exercises during moments of craving.
2. Mindfulness: Practice mindfulness to stay present and reduce anxiety.
3. Assertiveness Training: Learn to assertively say no to temptations.
4. Stress Management: Develop strategies to handle stress without resorting to substances.
5. Emotional Journaling: Use journaling to process emotions healthily.
6. Self-Reflection: Regularly reflect on personal progress and setbacks.
7. Positive Visualization: Use visualization techniques to imagine a sober life.
8. Gratitude Lists: Regularly list things you are grateful for.
9. Reward System: Set up a reward system for reaching sobriety milestones.
10. Relaxation Techniques: Learn and apply relaxation techniques.

Support Systems

1. Peer Support: Regularly meet with a peer group for encouragement and advice.
2. Spiritual Guidance: Seek regular guidance from a pastor or spiritual mentor.
3. Therapeutic Relationships: Maintain therapeutic relationships that reinforce recovery.
4. Family Counseling: Engage in family counseling to repair relationships affected by addiction.
5. Professional Help: Don’t hesitate to seek help from addiction specialists.
6. Educational Workshops: Attend workshops that teach coping skills for addiction.
7. Supportive Friends: Cultivate friendships with those who support your recovery journey.
8. Avoiding Negative Influences: Steer clear of environments and individuals that undermine recovery.
9. Church Elders: Reach out to church elders for wisdom and support.
10. Sponsorship: Consider a 12-step program with a sponsor who shares your faith.

Renewal and Reflection

1. Anniversary Reflections: Reflect on the progress made over each year of recovery.
2. Spiritual Renewal Days: Designate days for intensified prayer and meditation.
3. Baptism or Re-baptism: Consider this as a symbolic fresh start.
4. Witnessing to Others: Use your story to help others in their battles with addiction.
5. Spiritual Literature: Delve deeper into spiritual texts for insights and inspiration.
6. Pastoral Visits: Invite pastoral visits for home blessing and personal encouragement.
7. Renewing Vows: Renew personal vows of sobriety in a ceremonial way.
8. Pilgrimage: Undertake a spiritual pilgrimage as a form of personal and spiritual exploration.
9. Reflection Retreats: Engage in retreats specifically focused on overcoming past habits.
10. Memorializing Milestones: Create physical or digital memorials of your recovery milestones.

Emotional Resilience

1. Emotional Awareness: Develop awareness of emotions and triggers that lead to cravings.
2. Seek Forgiveness: Embrace forgiveness, both from others and for yourself.
3. Offer Forgiveness: Offer forgiveness to those who have hurt you, releasing bitterness.
4. Spiritual Songs: Sing or listen to spiritual songs that uplift and comfort.
5. Hope Messages: Write down messages of hope and revisit them during tough times.
6. Encouragement Letters: Write letters of encouragement to yourself for future moments of weakness.
7. Daily Devotionals: Follow a daily devotional plan that addresses addiction recovery.
8. Prayer Chains: Initiate or join prayer chains for continuous spiritual support.
9. Healing Services: Attend healing services focused on emotional and spiritual restoration.
10. Scriptural Promises: Memorize promises from the Bible that assure support and deliverance.

Social Connectivity

1. Social Activities: Organize or participate in sober social gatherings with fellow church members.
2. Church Family Outreach: Engage in church family outreach programs to build a supportive community.
3. Mentoring Others: Become a mentor to others struggling with addiction, sharing lessons and faith.
4. Recovery Testimonials: Regularly give testimonials at recovery meetings to inspire and affirm.
5. Family Devotions: Hold regular devotions with family to strengthen bonds and mutual support.
6. Prayer Groups: Form or join small prayer groups focused on overcoming addiction.
7. Christian Conferences: Attend Christian conferences on recovery and personal growth.
8. Community Service Projects: Lead or participate in community service projects to foster a sense of purpose.
9. Recovery Celebrations: Celebrate recovery milestones with your church community.
10. Faith-Based Podcasts: Listen to and discuss faith-based podcasts on overcoming challenges.

Mindset and Lifestyle

1. Optimism: Cultivate an optimistic outlook based on faith and hope in God’s plan.
2. Daily Affirmations: Start the day with Christian affirmations about strength and recovery.
3. Mindfulness of God’s Presence: Continuously remind yourself of God’s presence in your life.
4. Avoiding Idleness: Keep yourself busy with meaningful activities that align with Christian values.
5. Spiritual Biographies: Read biographies of Christians who overcame significant struggles.
6. Health Check-Ups: Regularly attend health check-ups to monitor physical health during recovery.
7. Sabbath Rest: Observe Sabbath rest as a time to rejuvenate spiritually and physically.
8. Christian Movies: Watch movies with Christian themes that reinforce your resolve and values.
9. Spiritual Accountability: Regularly review your spiritual and recovery progress with a mentor.
10. Prayer Walks: Incorporate prayer walks as a way to combine physical activity and spiritual meditation.

Continued Learning and Growth

1. Biblical Courses: Take courses on biblical studies that relate to healing and redemption.
2. Spiritual Workshops: Attend workshops that focus on spiritual growth and overcoming addictions.
3. Faith-Based Counseling Techniques: Learn counseling techniques that are based on Christian principles.
4. Scripture Memorization: Engage in scripture memorization to strengthen spiritual warfare against cravings.
5. Pastoral Workshops: Participate in workshops offered by pastors that focus on living a sober life.
6. Faith and Science: Explore the intersection of faith and science in understanding addiction.
7. Christian Leadership Courses: Take courses in Christian leadership to empower your role in the community.
8. Retelling Your Story: Learn to retell your story in ways that highlight God’s grace and your growth.
9. Spiritual Discernment: Enhance spiritual discernment to recognize paths and choices that support sobriety.
10. Continuous Prayer: Maintain an attitude of continuous prayer, acknowledging dependence on God for daily victory over addiction.

text pics 951-530-7555
pool, jacuzzi, drinks

heyyy! i’m from ireland but i’m moving to louisiana for grad school in the summer. i’d love to make some friends close by or just in the US in general so i’m not super lonely when i get there. it’d be good to meet people who are also looking for genuine long term friends and have shared interests me. i’m more into voice calls and voice notes but i’m down to text too if that’s preferred. so you can get to know me a little bit, here are some things i’m into:

• i’m a huge film buff. i have a dvd collection and i’m trying to watch at least a film a day in 2024. i love the oscars too and will watch all the noms every year so i can make predictions lol
• i like comedy tv and my fave tv show is it’s always sunny. other tv shows i like include community, the office and bojack horseman
• i listen to a lot of music and make a spotify playlist for each month. i think my playlists are insanely good with bragging rights so hit me up if you wanna check them out. i mainly listen to r&b and hiphop but my fave band is weezer so i’d say my taste is fairly diverse
• i love tattoos and talking about them. i have 14 so far, with the majority being totally strange and easily regrettable in a couple of years. please send me tattoo pics!!
• i like reading non fiction books and i’d like some recommendations

if you think we have anything in common you should hit me up with a bit about yourself. i probably won’t reply to low effort or copy pasted messages, sorry! (but also not sorry). i like finding people who i feel match my vibe well. also i am mainly looking to chat with people who are 23-30, just feel like i get on better with people in that age range. hope to hear from you soon!!

Introduction
Someone reading this book may wonder what sort of audience is being targeted here. They may also be confused as to what the endgame is behind such a book. The aim of this book is to parallel the different religious & mystic traditions & connect them to the tropes that we find near death experiences propagate. They often are reconnecting us with what ancient texts have said but in the modern secular world where materialism is the norm we have become numb to the meanings & impact behind such text. These texts are often considered archaic & primitive. Unable to contribute much to the modern world they may only be useful in prayer chants.
Thus I aim here to revitalise the spirit of these traditions and connect them to what many call the modern day scriptures. The study of near death experiences, neuroscience, consciousness & other paranormal phenomena.
The endgame of the mystic is to connect, achieve union, knowledge and self growth. Thus by approaching all these texts and the various evolving thought that emerged from it, we can explore the parallels and connections that bridge the gap between traditions. The beauty of mysticism and perennial philosophy is the freedom it offers in interpretation.
This book doesn't focus on the question of whether scriptures are divinely inspired, man made tools written for sociological and political agendas or some sort of corrupted divinity. That discussion is a debate that will never end. Rather the focus here is on the possible wisdom & theological beliefs which parallel and mesh together well in forming a higher meaning & connection to the divine. Whether it be a higher power, an all pervading source or a metaphysical truth. You aren’t required to literally believe the divinity of these texts. A simple level of curiosity & intrigue is sufficient.
However one may contend that it is easy to parallel traditions when they are in harmony but when they differ they directly contradict rendering these connections meaningless and superficial. Therein lies the limitations of this book. Therefore the following concepts won’t be discussed in here. These are mainly :

• Unverifiable supernatural claims such as ancient miracles for instance Moses parting the sea, Jesus walking on water, resurrecting etc. For someone expecting this book to be a source of evidence for a specific religion it unfortunately won’t be. However there are multiple correlations and connections and these may act as subtle signs of evidence for a specific faith or multiple of them.
  
• Reconciling contradictions between belief systems and scriptures. For example whether the Divine is a trinity or a unity. Whether a certain sage was superior to another. For instance comparing the personality of Jesus with Muhammad, whether the Bible is morally perfect or not & a plethora of other beliefs that may not agree with one another. The book simply assumes they all are imperfect systems.
  
• The scientific debate on whether NDEs are classified as hallucinations or genuine supernatural occurrences. Whilst an interesting topic in itself, it is out of the scope of this book with many other books discussing the science behind ndes. However when necessary nde claims will be contrasted with naturalistic explanations.
  

The primary focus is in following a don't throw the baby out with the bathwater approach. Some may also contend that this book follows a shopping cart style of cherrypicking from texts and discarding beliefs from texts one subjectively finds inappropriate. To this I would simply say that the approach here is one of finding the parallels that align well together and acknowledging when a belief doesn't align well. Not necessarily a pick and choose system. An approach I would call the rational mystic.
The rational mystic is one who is simply open to what may be beyond their senses. They may be mystically inclined, fascinated and open to the plethora of supernatural ideas. However they will not blindly believe any and all beliefs. They will discern using rational faculties what of mysticism is most compatible with reality, what the data or evidence shows & what is more probable than not. I believe people of all beliefs or no beliefs can fit this definition. Whether you identify by a religion, as spiritual but not religious, non religious, atheist, deist or agnostic. Thus a skeptic or believer may able to gain an appreciation for these belief systems.
This book dives into the verses and parallels of ancient texts such as the Old Testament, Gospels, Quran, Hadith, Bhagwad Gita, Dhammapada, Tao Te Ching & Gathas of Zoroaster. Other older parallels such as from Vedic India, Ancient Egypt, Greece & Mesopotamia may be referenced.
Alongside that are the testimonies of NDEs and how they may parallel or differ to these texts. This book also attempts to provide commentary on major philosophical themes & elaborate on various exegesis, mystical traditions such as Kaballah, Sufism, Advaita Vedanta, Neoplatonism & Chinese thought. Since mysticism is ultimately about experience it relevant and useful to enhance these discussions by contrasts to various scientific ideas, philosophy & pop culture.
NDE Filter Methodology
One of the problems with ndes is the fact that they are subjective experiences which we cannot objectively verify or replicate. This makes them a weaker form of evidence compared to empirical studies which can replicate the results. These present a challenge. An individual nde may therefore be subject to embellishment, fabrications & delusions. Therefore in picking our choice of NDEs here we can only look at ndes as a whole in terms of statistical patterns that form. This is the methodology used in NDE literature by various academics including neuroscientists & philosophers researching the phenomenon.
To elaborate we therefore will discard testimonies that appear embellished with fantastical details. These fantastical details may also be subjective from person to person. Calling an otherworldly journey fantastical is simply irony. However in following the certain patterns that appear cross culturally in ndes it is much easier to identify reports that are considered fantastical. The following tropes appear the most across multiple nde studies.

• Out of Body Experience
• Tunnel of Light
• Meeting deceased relatives or unknown beings
• Perceiving a highly luminous pervading light
• Feelings of absolute peace, comfort & love
• Arriving at an otherworldly place ie a meadow, garden etc.
• Life Review
• Border of no return
• Pluralistic message about love & wisdom

There are of course other concepts that ndes reference which appear from time to time. These allow ndes to be flexible and not rigid experiences. After all no two nde experiences are the same. However using these motifs listed we can filter through unreliable ndes. These include

• NDE reports that are highly coloured with religious fundamentalist tropes particularly tropes promoting an exclusivist attitude to religion.
• NDEs that appear too detailed, fantastical & unrestricted appearing more like a science fiction or fantasy novel. For example nde claims of multiple lives on other planets or large scale prophecies & apocalyptic predictions & generally things that differ wildly from the core themes
• NDEs that talk too much about one specific spiritual concept, portraying themselves as special, prophets or mediums turning their nde into a narcissistic or monetary agenda through spiritual coaching, multiple books etc.

Finally one may say that the chapters of this book attempt to hint at the veracity of a religion & this book is a subtle attempt to proselytize that faith. I will reiterate that this book isnt trying to prove any specific religion. There may be subtle signs from one faith that fit better with the nde phenomenon than others. The following theories I would say explain these subtle signs. I leave it up to the reader to decide what they feel is the best explanation.

• Universal Divine Theory : This is the idea that prophets, mystics & sages from different cultures have been inspired through revelation from the same source & this explains the shared insights of a religion & ndes.
  
• Mystic Wisdom Theory : This simply means that certain religious writers and founders were simply wise spiritual men, mystically inclined honing on their intuition & knowledge.
  
• Intertextuality Theory : Each new religious founder simply built of older religious ideas assimilating it into their theologies.
  

Whilst these theories may suggest a subtle spark of corresponding truths, generally NDEs dont explicitly point to any religion. Some say its simply the case that a Christian will see Jesus, a Muslim will see Allah, A Jew sees Yahweh & a Hindu sees Krishna. This of course is not entirely true. The portion of ndes that claim to see Jesus form a minority & interestingly they too dont point at specific doctrines. NDE experiencers may simply describe a sentient light they perceive to be God. This being doesnt tell anybody that I am Yahweh or Allah. Experiencers will say that religious texts fall short of describing this being. It is beyond what people are taught in religion.
Those who are familiar with NDE reports and studies will know that NDEs tend to be very religion agnostic and at best subtly imply a religious correlation but rarely do we find massive amounts of nde reports cross culturally presenting exclusivist dogmas such as follow holy book x or you will burn, believe Jesus died for your sin or you will burn for eternity. When an nde does present this its seen as a red flag since this doesn't occur with the majority of other ndes. The most we have are subtle religious correlations. However NDEs do present us with certain philosophical dilemmas when it comes to religion.

• If NDEs are vague about religion how are we to interpret these religions ? Are we to see them as man made socio-cultural constructs ? Are we to see them as inspired by God but limited to their time ? Are we to see them as partially divine partially man made scriptures ?
  
• If NDEs prove that religions are man made we must ask what purpose the creator has behind the nde. If the creator has allowed man made cultures to negatively influence and control the world throughout history and has not intervened or communicated with humanity one must wonder what point there is in a nde being a message in the 21st century. So on one hand the NDE presents us with a deistic God who doesnt intervene and let false religions begin and on the other hand the God of the NDE seems very personal, involved in human lives, keeps tracks, feels love and joy for humans etc
  
• If one, many or all religions are truly divinely inspired why do NDES never directly point to this ? NDEs seem more concerned in lessons but not in pointing people to a religion.
  

Some may ask what difference does it make that it doesnt point to a religion. if anything NDEs show us that God is far beyond the narrow confines of religions. It makes an immense difference when we factor the fact that religions have influenced entire cultures and civilisations in good and bad ways. Religions have been used to wage war, cause destruction, control the masses, brainwash, confuse and build fear into the human subconscious. And on the good side religions have given hope to the world that suffering isnt in vain, that life has meaning & that justice and ultimate happiness exists.
For alot of people the need to connect to the transcendental is insatiable and religion provides a whole structure of beliefs that one can organise themselves on. For some this is very restricting and enforces a cultural dogma on to everyone. They may prefer a shopping cart version of religion where they take whats good for them and discard what they disagree on. For others they prefer to deny all religious concepts as dogma and cultural beliefs. One could argue that humans need the cultural clothing of customs and traditions to keep their lives going, something which they can use to relate with to the divine. Not everyone can believe in an abstract deity that they cannot conceive of in the absence of symbols such as scriptures.
Religious texts provide at the very least a gateway to which one can relate through stories of heroes, morals and metaphors of the divine. Of course none of this leads us to whether said divine being has revealed these texts, whether they are inspired but corrupted by man or fully man made. These symbols act as aids in feeling like we have a piece of the divine soul with us thus giving comfort and hope. Thus whilst some have no need for religions, for the masses religions have immense value.
So why dont NDEs prove religion ?
There are no clear answers to this (unless somebody has an nde and asks whoever they speak with to tell them in specifics what religion is from God and whats not) all we can do is speculate. The ndes that do ask or do mention a scripture are so few that we cannot form any conclusion on this.

• The simplest answer is that all religions are man made for good or bad intentions but this would of course lead us to the philosophical deist dilemma.
• Perhaps the NDEs message focuses on the lessons and ideals itself and sees scriptures and religions as redundant (even if there is a divine hand behind some) After all these are mainly symbols and cannot compare to a direct mystical experience (something fundamentalists struggle with)
• Perhaps an attempt to promote any specific faith would lead to an assumption that the nde message is about exclusivist salvation and leading to the worship of scriptures/religions (something fundamentalists struggle with)
• Perhaps this proves that religions are limited to their century and context and that we should only look to them for the universal timeless message they offer not the specifics. After all all major scriptures teach the core values that NDEs have revitalised ie love, mercy, kindness etc

Do NDEs support materialism or not ?
While the aim of this book isnt to debate the afterlife or brain hypothesis, I will say that at the time of this being written, my view on ndes is to say that I consider them a plausible source of evidence towards consciousness surviving death & the afterlife existing. This view of mine may change in time towards either side. The following are some reasons I would argue for them being plausible.
1 Veridical NDEs : Numerous NDES report out of body experiences including witnessing of events in an environment when this should not be possible. More than 100+ veridical cases have been documented. Not to mention veridical cases from across different countries which further strengthens the case. We would have to be radically skeptical to consider all of these testimonies fabricated.
2 Lucid narrative : NDERS experience a highly lucid narrative that usually doesn't end in the middle or chaotically unlike dreams or hallucinations. Their ndes tend to be structured with a beginning, middle and end where they are either told, know or are sucked back into the body. This is quite a strange experience compared to delirium, delusions, hallucinations etc.
3 Deceased Relatives : Most NDES claim to see deceased relatives rather than alive people supporting the afterlife hypothesis. We should expect a mixed cocktail of alive & deceased people appearing in ndes if this was a case of dreams or hallucinations. The population that do claim to see a mixed group of alive and deceased is quite a small proportion of total ndes.
4 Intuitive Reality : NDERS are very convinced that they are in a hyper real reality that makes this world seem black and white, like a dream/illusion as some would say. They are intuitively convinced they are in something real the way we might be talking in person, as opposed to it being just a dream. In one study its believed that nders brain recollect their nde as if it's a real world memory.
5 ESP claims : NDERS may perceive no time at all, may experience a life review such that they can feel the feelings of others and recall memories long forgotten. They may feel like they intuitively know things without needing to learn. Some may report greater vision and detail than waking life, ability to hear thoughts, instantaneously appear, be in two places at once or pass through solid walls.
5 Religious Expectations : NDES often may contradict the beliefs of many Christians, Atheists and Muslims who have varying beliefs about the afterlife. Some may be surprised to experience the things they see & are particularly surprised at the ESP abilities as these are not predicted by religions. Particularly interesting are religious conservative ndes with more exclusivist beliefs who are surprised and end up becoming more pluralist and liberal.
6 Clinical Death Scenario : The best NDE studies focus on scenarios whereby the person undergoes cardiac arrest and thus clinical death. At this time a person has no heartbeat, no breathing, dilated pupils, no light reflex, no gag reflex and EEG reading of little to no brain activity. This is consistent with unconsciousness as no blood and oxygen can fully reach the brain. Furthermore the fact that most undergoing clinical death dont report any experiences means NDEs are odd occurrences & consciousness should not occur.
7 Transformation : NDERS often are transformed in their beliefs with less to no fear of death, detachment from the material, more interest in altruism and spirituality and are impacted by their NDE for decades, remembering it far more than a hallucination or dream. They see it as the most important experience of their life.
8 Double edged sword : The fact that not everyone has an nde may support the idea of nde being more than brain activity. After all if the nde simply was some evolutionary dying mechanism we would expect everybody to have one. This point could also support naturalistic hypothesis (See below)
However there is still uncertainty regarding the nde phenomenon and further data, & studies are required to build a case that is greater than just plausible. These are some opposing reasons to consider doubt in them valid
1 Embellishment : NDEs are unverifiable and therefore we cannot verify which ndes are authentic or which ndes are embellished over time with the nders own thoughts, interpretations or exaggerations. This makes it easier for fabrications and frauds to claim an nde experience.
2 Brain Activity : Since NDES happen during clinical death or unconscious states where a persons brain can be returned to living we cannot be sure that there isnt some deeper brain activity that causes an nde. We also cant be sure than an nde isnt happening in the window where cerebral blood flow hasnt ceased or in the window where CPR leads back to cerebral blood flow. EEG machines also have certain limitations such that they cannot detect deeper brain regions due to the skulls electrical resistance. EEG spikes may occur due to muscle twitches & electrical noise which can often make it harder to differentiate whether this is due to the NDE or not.
3 Cultural/Religious Contradictions : If we keep an open mind, its entirely possible that a Western nde could see Jesus, an Indian nde see Buddha or an Indian nde see Jesus & a Western nde see Buddha. It seems this can be reconciled by the idea that ndes are customized to fit what comforts people subconsciously. Japanese NDEs for example see a bridge/river symbolizing journey to another world, Westerners a portal/tunnel. Westerners relate best to Jesus, Easterners to other figures. However some ndes provide conflicting metaphysical views. This can be an issue with some ndes if nde 1 says they were told to keep reincarnating until they reach nirvana, nde 2 says something more fitting to abrahamic faith. nde 3 says hell doesnt exist and nde 4 says they saw hell realms.
4 Double edged Sword : This point can be argued for ndes (See above) but also against ndes. Only a small percentage 10-20% of those under cardiac arrest are said to have experienced an nde. This point leaves questions as to why aren't all people experiencing an nde. Should we not expect a larger proportion say more than half of people to experience an nde ? If there is a realm beyond the material should we not expect every person to experience an nde. A low proportion may mean that the nde is some sort of brain anomaly. We only have speculations as to why all dont get an nde.
5 Future Science : Current materialistic explanations may be inadequate to explain ndes but this doesnt mean that future understanding of the brain may not yield a new theory/explanation that explains it away. Thus it remains a potential argument.
All of these points are worthy discussions on their own and can be found in various other valuable books. The above points are simply a valuable framework by which the reader may be able to take away what they value out of this book. Everything written is simply my own research into the subject & I always advise people to take it with a grain of salt unless it makes rational sense to you & appeals to your intuition.
Diving into the depths
Spirituality & mysticism can be thought of as two sides of the same coin with philosophy the ring that runs the circumference of the coin. While spirituality deals with the human aspects such as soul, spirit, ego, morality & purpose, mysticism deals with the divine aspects of things such as essences, attributes, metaphors, realities, realms, entities, space, time, substances etc. We aim to dive into the following themes in this book.
The Divine Source : Everything relevant to defining the higher power & source of existence including essences & attributes.

Consciousness & Spirit : Everything relevant to the nature of consciousness, qualia, perceptions, the spirit & soul.
Reality : Everything relevant to the nature of perception, illusion, concepts, space, time, substances, modes, forms & realities.
Spirituality & Purpose : Everything relevant to the nature of human meaning, objectives, purpose & suffering.
Morality : Everything relevant to values, ideals, ethics & morals.
Knowledge & Truth : Everything relevant to the nature of seeking truth, seeking knowledge & attaining wisdom. These include concepts such as beliefs, truths, axioms, speculations, nature of inspirations & revelations.
Awakening & Dark night of Soul : Everything relevant to the nature of materialism, spiritual awakening, seeking inner peace, anxieties, depression, remorse, angst & layers of the psyche.
Divine Sorrow : Everything relevant to the nature of the eschatological souls corruption, redemption, purification, punishment, divine justice & mercy including modes & forms.
Divine Bliss : Everything relevant to the nature of the souls destiny, ultimate peace, happiness, bliss & divine love including modes & forms.

Hi I’m 19 I’m just a girl (queue the song) sometimes I’m funny (no don’t ask me to tell a joke it doesn’t work like that bro ) a lot of people describe me as chaotic and chill at the same time . I have adhd and I just like doing alot of shit but I wouldn’t consider them hobbies. Recently deleted instagram and YouTube so I am finally free of short form content but I’d like someone to chat with throughout the day !
Text me if you like

• random rambles
• dog and cats pics
• Mac de Marco
• cringe playlists
• stupid out of context YouTube videos
• complaints about nonsensical things

If you just text me hi /hey/hello I won’t answer (no not even if you do it as a stupid ironic joke ) send me a little intro about about you or just random things about about you or your day . Hope to hear from ya ! would definitely prefer if you’re from Europe

Hi I’m 19 I’m just a girl (queue the song) sometimes I’m funny (no don’t ask me to tell a joke it doesn’t work like that bro ) a lot of people describe me as chaotic and chill at the same time . I have adhd and I just like doing alot of shit but I wouldn’t consider them hobbies. Recently deleted instagram and YouTube so I am finally free of short form content but I’d like someone to chat with throughout the day !
Text me if you like

• random rambles
• dog and cats pics
• Mac de Marco
• cringe playlists
• stupid out of context YouTube videos
• complaints about nonsensical things

If you just text me hi /hey/hello I won’t answer (no not even if you do it as a stupid ironic joke ) send me a little intro about about you or just random things about about you or your day . Hope to hear from ya ! would definitely prefer if you’re from Europe

Jesus was confused with Satan by some cultures and even worshipped as such – despite the fact that he was considered a "good" Satan and a "positive" Devil that sided with the weak and vulnerable and betrayed the "powerful ones" in order to dedicate himself and his life completely to the poor. (Such notion is not alien at all even to the texts – because Jesus is expressly called the Morning Star in 2 Peter 1:19 and in Revelation 2:28).
This is apparent in the fact that the Hebrews for example did not recognize Christ as the Messiah and they even called him "evil" and applied to him the title "Satan" (from the Hebrew: "śāṭān" meaning: "adversary, enemy"). The definition of "evil" here is relative – because since Jesus went against the teachings that the Hebrews held as sacred and he also went against the teachings that the Muslims for example also regarded as sacred (and he went against many other cultures as well for that matter; because the figure of Jesus was pagan and it actually belonged worldwide to all cultures of the world and he was claimed to have opposed all of them trying to reform them) – he was thus called "evil" in relative terms by some of these cultures; meaning an "enemy" or "adversary" of those doctrines. Originally not even the Christians considered Christ as a positive figure; because Christ professed a lot of ideals that were inconceivable and impossible to apply according to the mentality of the powerful castes that rule society – like the priesthood for example; because Jesus claimed many times that the wealthy ones must renounce everything they have, they must give their money to the poor and then and only then – will they be allowed to follow Christ.
But the Church completely ignored and bypassed this teaching of Christ because they knew that if they had started preaching this to their believers; they would lose all believers in one second since no one wants to give up their house, their wealth and their life to follow the Church. So even the Church had to rearrange and modify a lot of the teachings of Christ while straight up censoring and ignoring others; in order to create a religion out of it. The only difference is that the Christian Church decided that it was worth investing their time and money in turning Jesus into the symbol of their faith and into a figure that would appeal to the masses (basically deifying him and using his name and memory to attract people into the religion) – while the other two religions (Judaism and Islam) completely disregarded Jesus altogether and considered him a madman instead and even went as far as to call him "evil" and a "Devil" precisely because he had preached such revolutionary notions that were just impossible to accept for the rich and wealthy. (Another reason for this is also because Judaism had a different idea of the Messiah altogether and they followed a different Messiah – and this other idea of the Messiah along with the other Messiah – were also very different from the "Jesus Christ" concept altogether – but that’s besides the point).
The symbology of the spring refers to the blood of Christ which gives life and makes vegetation grow on the earth much like the water of a spring; but it also holds literal meaning because the pagan figures who correspond to "Jesus" were all claimed to have met their demise or to have had a life-changing experience happen near a spring or near a water-source more generally speaking. Such is the case for Hermaphroditus who was rendered female by his union with Salmacis near a spring; or also the castration of one of the gods called "Uranus" – because according to Cicero in his "De Natura Deorum" there were multiple Uranuses and one of them was the "younger" one – and he’s the same who was said to have been castrated near a spring by Phoenician mythology. (The fact that Hermaphroditus was joined to Salmacis thus becoming definitively feminine near the waters of a spring – refers to the confusion that happened in the myth due to the nature of the two characters taken into analysis; because Hermaphroditus and Salmacis were actually brother and sister in other iterations of the story and they were claimed to have been conjoined thus essentially making up a single being who was a "man-woman" united. But then after their birth they were separated and their bodies were not conjoined anymore; although the male – in this case Hermaphroditus – was claimed to have been castrated in further iterations of the story so it looked as though he had returned to being a female and was thus "rejoined" to his female nature which is why the Greek myth confused it and claimed that Hermaphroditus lost his manhood but he lost it by being rejoined to his twin-sister Salmacis. In reality he was castrated near the waters of that spring – the "conjoined" part referring instead to the myth of their birth, but the two accounts were later confused and amalgamated into a single story for the Hermaphroditus myth; thus confusing also the timeline on when exactly was it that the two siblings were conjoined – whether it was at the beginning of their lives or at the end of it as in the case of Hermaphroditus and Salmacis).
The god Attar of the planet Venus was worshipped as "Atarsamain" (Attar of heaven) by the Arabs and equated with Allat i.e. Athena (a fact that has left academics dumbfounded even to this day as for how is it possible that a male god was completely equated and identified with a female one. But the answer is found in the mythology and themes of the god himself – where he was considered of androgynous nature and was claimed to have underwent castration which made him be perceived as a female by some cultures). He was furthermore equated with the goddess Anat in the form of "Ninurta" – because the Mesopotamian warrior-god Ninurta being equivalent to Attar (and Atarsamain) himself – he was directly equated with the Canaanite goddess "Anat" and the name of Anat was also written as "NIN.URTA" in cuneiform. There is an epithet of Anat which calls the deity: "the strength of life" and this particular epithet is applied to Ninurta continuously throughout Sumerian mythology because he’s consistently called the "strength of Enlil" – the "one with superior strength" – the "son in whose strength the father rejoices" – the one with the "strength of a lion" and Ninurta was also in charge of ditches and canals being the one who created the canal-system in Sumer and who was claimed to have brought to everyone the waters of the Tigris and Euphrates rivers as a result. The epithet of Anat – in this case referring to the male Anat who was though still worshipped as female regardless because the god possessed androgynous qualities (and not coincidentally the term "Nin" which comprises the name "Nin-urta" is actually more often than not utilized for female goddesses in Sumerian culture; for example "Ninhursag", "Ninisina", "Ninlil" etc. as it usually means "lady" – but in this case the word assumes a neutral meaning and its connotation is given by the context; so since the god is male it’s translated as "lord" – but the androgynous aspect of this deity is still kept intact nonetheless by using "Nin" instead of "En" ("En" being more traditionally used in Sumerian to mean "lord") – and the title thus refers for the concept of "the strength of life" to the strength of life as a life-giver; because Ninurta being associated with water and with the fertilizing effects of water having been the one who brought canals and ditches to Sumer; the meaning of the term thus acquired such connotation.
This deity is also always associated with physical beauty; for example in the case of Dumuzi (the Mesopotamian god of vegetation) who was called "the one with the beautiful eyes" and even in the form of "Ishtaran" (a form of Dumuzi worshipped as the "heavenly serpent") – where there are several references to his "beautiful face". This notion of beauty is once again reinforced and repeated for all other versions of this pagan god as he was called by many different names throughout cultures – for example also in the form of "Joseph" the biblical son of Jacob; who was claimed to be so beautiful that while a slave in Egypt the women could not resist him – or even in the form of Japheth the third son of Noah (who corresponds still to the same character) – where the word "Japheth" is connected to the root meaning "to be beautiful".
Thus the ideals of "strength and beauty" refer to him. (The pagan imagery of this god depicts him joyous and free as he dances through the flower-fields and while bringing the springing of vegetation to the seasons – often times represented with ears of corn or garlands adorning his head; as in the case of his Slavic counterpart "Potrimpo" for example).
Christ furthermore corresponds also to the pagan god Dionysus as mentioned in other posts; and Dionysus had a particular epithet in Rome which later ended up becoming his main name (or one of his many names alongside the more renown "Bacchus") and this particular title was that of "Liber" i.e. "the free one", one who embodies "freedom".
In form of "Ishtaran" Dumuzi was worshipped as "Anu" as well – since they called Ishtaran with the epithet "AN.GAL" i.e. "great Anu"; thus meaning that Dumuzi was so beloved and his cult had risen to such prominence at some point – that some local traditions (smaller ones) worshiped him as God the Creator himself and substituted him in place of Anu or at the very least differentiated him from the main "Anu" by calling him "AN.GAL" – "the great Anu" or "greater Anu". This is why Hermaphroditus/Jesus corresponds also in Phoenician mythology to the one "Uranus" who was said to have been castrated near a fountain-spring – Uranus being the Greek equivalent of the Sumerian "Anu" and this is why he was addressed with the name "Uranus" and worshipped as one of the "Uranuses" (the younger Uranus, because the older Uranus is instead the father of Cronus/Saturn and he’s a much older Uranus).
Given how Dumuzi was worshipped as the male Ishtar and as Attar in Canaanite lands (from whom the name "Ishtar" came from because the name of the goddess "Ishtar" is actually in the masculine gender and the goddess inherited that name from the male god who was called "Attar", "Ashtar" and "Ishtar" himself); one has to take into account that the male god was worshipped as androgynous though – which is why he was later equated with the female goddess Inanna in Mesopotamia and became indistinguishable from her to the point that she also came to be called Ishtar herself. The rosette is the symbol of Venus and of this male god of Venus who corresponds to Christ himself.
But at the same time the rosette is also the symbol of the female Venus as well and of the goddess Inanna (the female form of Ishtar) so the rosette refers to both Ishtars; the male and female one referring to the planet Venus in general.
Now, seeing as to how the figure of the "son of god" was worshipped as "the creator" himself by some more local cultures who idolized him to such degree that they ended up seeing him as the superior god over others – this explains one of the symbologies present on the modern representation of the apparent "pagan god" of the Templars; where he’s depicted with the head of a goat and the five pointed star facing downward. The five pointed star being a symbol of the divine – it represents through the symbology present on the idol the fact that the god in question is not the one who resides in the sky (in which case the five pointed star would have to be pointing upwards instead); but they worshipped on the other hand a creator who was "the creator on earth" thus being "the one below" – so their god was represented by the pointed star facing downwards. (This is for the representations that depict the idol with the star facing down; otherwise in other cases the star is absent altogether).
Now, according to the Atbash ciphering interpretation done on the name "Baphomet" which becomes: "Sophia" – if the interpretation is indeed correct (that Baphomet=Sophia) it would make total sense given how the name of Christ himself was actually "Sophia" and the why that is was explained in this previous post: https://www.reddit.com/EsotericOccult/s/P3ZkDJvXdM – where essentially there was talk on the Christ’s physical appearance and the fact that he was born with androgynous traits. This for example made it so that the character in question also displayed overly-sized pectorals that were rather exposed when compared to the rest of his body and were also rounded and protruding; sometimes even resembling female breasts (and that’s where the symbology of the rooster sticking its chest out and of Christ "with breasts" came from: – the rooster in the act of sticking its chest out: https://i.pinimg.com/originals/81/a6/a5/81a6a5da3c527f3ce0fe1648a7650001.jpg – and the depiction of Christ "with breasts" on the Notre-Dame church: https://gcm.rmnet.be/clients/rmnet/content/medias/christus_750.jpg). This (physical) androgynous nature of the "son of god" was then explained through metaphors and in spiritual terms by Christianity and Gnosticism with the fact that when Sophia incarnated she incarnated as "Jesus Christ".
But – there was also a female-incarnated Sophia; which incarnated as a woman and the figure in question is sometimes identified with the "Thetokos" i.e. "mother of god" Mary – or alternatively substituted by Mary Magdalene the consort of Jesus (being called the "Bride of Christ"). The fact that the Templars were claimed to have worshipped the prophetic head of a female alongside their god refers to the cult of the pagan goddess who corresponded to the Magdalene – where; she was claimed in pagan mythology to have been decapitated or to have been "half-decapitated" (her throat cut significantly to the point of almost detaching her head from her neck) and the goddess in question possessed oracular as well as prophetic gifts. The notion of Magdalene who corresponds to this pagan goddess was addressed in this previous post: https://www.reddit.com/EsotericOccult/s/iHlaRrZnzL. (The head that the Templars held was of course symbolic and not the literal real head. But what was important is what that symbol represented to them – rather than to whom the skull belonged because it was a simple human skull taken from a cadaver).
So essentially the Templars were worshipping both Christ and Magdalene through pagan imagery (Christ being "Sophia" himself and Magdalene being the "female Sophia" who’s the counterpart of the Messiah); something which was not acceptable to the Church – and also because they were worshipping Christ in his real nature as opposed to the heavily filtered and altered version that Christianity gave of him – thus opposing the "official" canon established by the Church altogether.

I (23F) have been dating 25M for 10 months now. I am so scared I am going to sabotage this relationship because of my insecurities. I am just comparing myself endlessly with his ex and his ex-FWB, and even random girls.
It’s almost like I want to make myself feel anxious and insecure. Information, pictures or texts that I've found through lurking (which I try to stop doing) hurts my feelings but have burned themselves into my head. For example,
the summer we started dating he was frequently liking his ex-FWB pictures on IG - some revealing, some not - last one he liked was from a couple of months back, a very revealing one where she had taken a picture from above, angle looking into her tanktop, her tongue was out, nipple piercings visable through her shirt, very suggestive. Him liking provocative pictures of a woman he used to have sex with makes me uncomfortable. He hasn't done it for months now, but I fear it could return around summer when she wears revealing outfits again.
I've also recently realized in a group chat with his friends he added me to, you can look back at messages before you were in the GC. That led me to look way back and see some things from months before we started dating, that still bothers me. Messages about his ex-FWB, how hot she is, how hot it is that she is a masochist (I'm not one), etc. I even saw pictures he had shared in the GC of many, many nudes she had sent him and pictures he took while they were having sex, in many different positions. It bothers me it looks to be using the same BDSM equipment he uses on me, the same positions he likes me in, etc. It makes me paranoid he's thinking about her when he's having sex with me. From the pictures it was apparent she is more sexually confident than I am, which makes sense given she has a much bigger sexual history than I do, he only just took my virginity, but still, it makes me scared he wishes I was more like her.
I also saw a message he sent in the GC 8 days after him and I had met: “I asked *ex-fwb* if she wanted to fuck just now, she's online she’s ignoring me lol”. This was 8 days after we met, 8 days after he sent a message to that same GC about how he met a cute girl and he thinks that she likes him (me). We weren't official, didn't become so until 5 days after he sent that ex-fwb message, but still, it kind of hurts he wishes to hook up with her once more even after we had met, we had had our first date at that point. Especially also because he has told me multiple times that having sex with her reassured him that sex just as a means to get off wasn't for him, and that it was the emotional intimacy that made it important to him, he said he didn’t even enjoy it, wasn’t even attracted to her body type, etc…. yet he wanted to do it again? I fear he lied to me.
There were also some messages from the past about his ex. He send various different texts various different occasions about how he loves how extremely outgoing and sociable she is and that they can have such intelligent discussions. I feel like him and I never discuss things back and forth. I also am very, very much the opposite of "sociable", I am very quiet and subdued, I like to observe more than anything and talking to strangers makes me nervous. He also send a comment about how his ex, at the time when they were dating, had "perfect big boobs", which makes me insecure since mine are much more on the smaller side.
I also get jealous of girls we see when we're out. He's told me he's attracted to pale skin, dark hair and blue eyes - which I have - but so does a lot of other attractive girls. Whenever we see one, I get anxious thoughts telling me he thinks she is more attractive than me and that he wishes he was her girlfriend instead, and that if I wasn't there he would go and flirt with her, etc. He's also said he gets very turned on by girls in chokers, and whenever we see one that has one I get so insecure and sad, thinking he is imagining having sex with her and wishing he could be with her instead of me. I get really down by these thoughts, he always notices and asks me multiple times if I am OK, gets worried, etc. I try to pretend I am OK but I am not.
Another side note, is how whenever I perform oral or him I try to make eye contact but he always likes keeping his eyes closed. That makes me feel unattractive, like he doesn't want to look at me, despite saying how much he loves my eyes. It makes me feel so insecure because I always imagine he's probably thinking about someone else, or some porn he has seen, instead of me.
This is me being insecure. I am aware of that, fully. I want to fix it. I am in queue for therapy, but with my country's’ psychiatric care being what it is, I can’t expect it to happen anytime soon. My friend waited for 2 years, and that is around the predicted time for anyone who isn’t willing to go the private route - which I don’t have money to do. So I’m doing my best with what I can do. It is absolutely exhausting, the way everything makes me second guess myself. I've considered breaking up multiple times, even though I love him and really can see myself having a family with him in the future, just because it is so draining and I feel much more insecure now than I ever did before we were dating.
The little insecurity that I do show, he will go on to reassure me a ton. Every time I give into my thoughts and ask him questions or express concerns he always is so loving, supportive and reassuring that he loves me for how I am, he's called me more attractive, trustworthy, more compatible, etc, that any girl he had a relationship with before, so it's not as if he is trying to make me insecure or anything. This is all in my head, but unfortunately being aware of that doesn't make it easier to get it out.
TL;DR: I'm struggling with insecurities in my relationship with my boyfriend of 9 months. I find myself comparing myself to his exes and feeling inadequate. I've discovered past messages about his ex-FWB and ex-girlfriend that exacerbate my anxiety, from before we were dating. In these messages he is calling her hot to his friends, seeing the GC nudes she sent him, graphic pictures from when they had sex, which makes me extremely insecure and worried that he prefers her, or is thinkig about her when we do stuff.
Also about his ex, about how he thinks she's so amazing for being sociable and outgoing and I am the completely opposite. I worry that he wishes I was more like her.. I feel jealous and uncomfortable with the fact that he has liked his ex-FWB provocative IG pics last summer and I worry he will start liking her pictures again this summer when she starts to wear less clothing again, despite them seemingly not having been in contact since she ghosted him. I'm aware of my insecurities and seeking therapy, but it's not readily available. My boyfriend is supportive, but I fear my insecurities may damage our relationship. How do I repair my insecurities?

For a while my wife has been receiving weird text. sometimes it will be like hey haven't heard from you in awhile and my wife will respond something like sorry you have the wrong number and next they will send some female Pic saying I'm sorry I hope I didn't bother you but we can still be friends and my wife would just stop texting and block the number this has happen at least 25 times so today she gets a text saying long time no see how are you? which immediately pisses her off she texts you don't know me he /she responds " Jenny this isn't fun will you have time tomorrow I would like to go shopping with you" lol my wife name isn't Jenny so I take the phone and start playing with them like yah I sure would like to go shopping just cash app me and i will be there and they're 'like send me some money and I'll give you cash" what that makes no sense at all but I keep going so we go back and forth for like an hour then the person tells me to commit suicide and get a job so I tell him you texted my wife and now your mad and that I can still be Jenny so he gets really mad and so I keep messing with him like dude your texting random people asking to go shopping and that he should use a dating app before a husband kills him at this point he tells me to stop texting him and what do I do I keep texting him like aww are you feelings hurt weirdo and I was having so much fun then once I put that I'm posting this he gets all in his feelings. I was really having fun and I must of was too strong a gal from him I did the reverse number look up and nothing came up but it is a 516 area code but whatever ever at least I got to see my wife start laughing again #protectivehusband
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someone please tell me how to add the screen shots I have to show the world this I mean there are straight weirdos out there

This sounded like the most interesting work I've seen coming from S. Connolly in a while, and it's based on a premise with a lot of potential: examining goetic sigils to identify elements associated with alchemical symbolism. I am not really a fan of Connolly's better-known works but I thought it would be worth checking this one out.
The basic structure of the book is to go through the Ars Goetia sigil by sigil, breaking each one down into a set of alchemical symbols, conjecturing on what kind of recipe or process it represents, and interpreting it metaphorically in spiritual/psychological terms.
The first thing I found a little frustrating is that there aren't any diagrams for the symbols contained within the sigils. She just lists them off, and you have to look them up in the symbol key, which is a set of scanned pages from a 18th-century manuscript. The pages are in Latin and Connolly mostly uses English terms to refer to the things the symbols represent, and there are multiple symbolic possibilities for most entries, so it's quite a bit of work to match up the symbols according to her descriptions. Given the immense diversity of alchemical symbols and their similarity (or direct equivalency) to magical alphabet letters, astrological symbols, and other polysemous characters, it's hard to say with any certainty how accurate any of this might be. Connolly does acknowledge the subjective nature of this process and her difficulty in finding interpretations for some of the sigils.
The recipes she matches up to the symbols are for alchemical and metallurgical processes as well as mundane stuff like making soap. There are some interesting ideas here, like connecting symbols for arsenic and its potential to create poisonous gas with warnings about "stinking breath" and other dangers to the practitioner, but where we mostly end up going with these interpretations is to metaphors for shadow work and mental health concepts that are consistent with ideas in modern demonolatry but would have been entirely anachronistic for the people who wrote the Lemegeton and its antecedent texts.
I appreciate that the book attempts to move the discussion forward in terms of analyzing the semiotics of goetic sigils in their historical context instead of falling back on "the spirits channeled them" or Rorschach-test interpretations like the ones in King's Faculty of Abrac, but Connolly doesn't make any attempt to reconcile her interpretations to the astrological symbolic keys provided by the Fourth Book of Occult Philosophy or the known connections between earlier sigils and magic squares. It's hard to buy into a purely alchemical interpretation of the sigils without factoring those into the analysis, and the book really would have benefitted from a more usable symbol key and diagrams of the breakdowns.
I don't think this book is a necessary read for beginning practitioners, and it's not the book we've all been waiting for in terms of decoding the goetic sigils, but you might find some value in it if you have a specific interest in sigil construction and/or the possible connections between alchemy and spirit work.

 It’s been 3 years since this happened but i still feel guilty about it, and i wanted to get some unbiased opinions on this to see if i’m wrong for what i did. When i (24F) was turning 21, i was doing pretty poorly financially. I was in a relationship where my then-boyfriend (27M) was regularly irresponsible with his money. We lived together, and for several months i had to cover large portions of his half of rent. I was already not making much money at the time, so covering his expenses while also trying to keep myself afloat was extremely difficult, and there were several points where i had less than $50 to my name and had to go to sleep hungry. A few weeks before my birthday, my mother (62F) asked me what i wanted for my birthday. She had already known about my financial struggles, so i swallowed my pride and asked her for a little money to help me out with my bills. I didn’t put a specific number on it. I just asked for anything to help me, could’ve been 20 bucks and i would’ve been grateful for the help. I know it’s crass to ask someone for money as a gift but i was desperate and she knew it. Despite knowing that i needed financial help, she insisted on getting me a “real gift” because i should have something meaningful and special for a landmark birthday. Whatever, that’s fine and i understand feeling a need to give me something material. Half jokingly, i asked her for a bottle of tequila to help me celebrate my 21st instead. I suppose she didn’t think that was a good enough gift either, because when my birthday came and i opened it, it was a pair of diamond earrings. Nothing crazy, just some simple studs. I thanked her profusely and acted super excited because i knew that was the reaction she was hoping for, but deep down i felt kinda upset that she’d spent so much money on jewelry for me when i was just struggling to afford groceries. I want to make it clear that i was (and still am) extremely grateful for that gift, because the earrings still cost a lot of money and i know she really thought i’d be over the moon about them. It just wasn’t what i really needed at the time. Fast forwarding to a few weeks after my birthday, it was now time to pay rent for the month. After all my bills, i still had enough money to pay my share of the rent and have a couple hundred left over for groceries or whatever else i needed. But of course, my boyfriend came to me again saying he didn’t have the money to pay his part. So doing what i had to do, i decided once again to cover the leftover amount that he couldn’t. Once rent was paid, i had all of $6 in my account. I shit you not. This was a huge issue for me, especially because i had never had my accounts go into the single digits before and i also needed to get groceries because our fridge was almost completely empty. Being that i was essentially the sole provider for my ex and myself, i decided i needed to do whatever i could to make ends meet. I’m not proud of it, but times were tough. I took the earrings she bought me to a nearby pawn shop. i hadn’t even gotten a chance to wear them but honestly, i didn’t even want to. To me, they symbolized excess in a time of poverty. The man at the counter bought them off of me for only $80 but at the time, that was gold to me. For context, my mother left the tag on the earrings when i opened them, and they were on clearance for $300 so i wasn’t expecting much more money than that. The man who sold them to me texted me almost immediately after i left the shop. I assume he got my number from the form i had to fill out before selling that included my contact info. He told me he’d throw in an extra 50 if i went over to his house sometime. I declined, blocked him, and called the store the next day to complain to his boss that he was trying to solicit some kind of sexual favor from me and using the form i filled out to creep on me. Not really relevant to the story but i thought i’d share that lovely experience. That $80 ended up helping me through the week until i got my paycheck again, and i signed my ex up to be an UberEats driver so the motherfucker could cover his own ass next month. After that i started making a bit more money so i wasn’t constantly so stressed about paying my bills and running myself ragged. The earrings were mostly at the back of my mind until my mom asked me about them one day. I saw my mom at least twice a week, and after maybe a month or so, she asked why i never wore the earrings. I guess every time we hung out she was looking to see if i’d had them on. Not having the balls to tell her i pawned them, i told her i was afraid of wearing them somewhere and then losing them. She tried arguing with me a bit about how they wouldn’t fall off that easily, but i’m already an ~anxious~ person so i basically made it seem like i was just super anxious about them falling off somewhere and she dropped the bickering. Ever since then, every couple months, she brings up the earrings and asks again why i just don’t wear them. I don’t see her that often now, but she still notices. I always have varying excuses for why i don’t have them on. I just feel like i cannot be honest with her about selling them, because she would lose her mind and probably end up screaming at me over it. That’s not an exaggeration either, she’s extremely attached to material things and things that glitter and this would come as a huge slight to her. I just honestly needed the money more, and if she’d really wanted to give me something special that meant a lot to me, she would’ve just helped me as i’d originally asked. Unfortunately i know that even if i explained that to her, she wouldn’t understand just how dire my financial situation was at the time. Or she’d just insist that i could’ve somehow made ends meet. I’ve told a few friends about this as well as my current boyfriend, and they all say i’m NTA and i did what i needed to do. When i told my cousins up north, they both told me i should’ve just picked up more hours at work for extra cash and that i was wrong for selling them. Regardless of the verdict, I feel so guilty for it and for lying to my mom too. I just know how she reacts to most things and it’s never with an open mind. So, AITA for pawning earrings that were gifted to me by my mother? 

(also wanted to apologize in advance if the formatting looks awful, im on mobile)

I actually used to like a e-girl (yes I'm a fool), had asked her out too and she too was interested in me. We were 17 and 16 respectively back then, 3 years have passed now, on 30th December 2023, 14:12 she sent a message saying she doesn't want to continue this further all of a sudden, called me an emotional baggage etc, and said good bye.
Those 3 years, we literally used to share everything with each other, from our life goals to our likings etc. she wanted to be an Dr, last year only she topped neet, got into one of the best colleges of our country.
I on other hand is in one of the state Universities pursuing BA, currently in my last year, her life is set from here on and me is betting myself on UPSC 🙂
I like this stream, I like this course, but I don't whether I'll be able to clear it 😔
Reh reh kar I remember her too, apart from studies I've nothing to do in life, no rl friends, no college friends etc. college is also ending now, only books, online classes and me.
Don't know how I'll be able to come out of this. I may be sounding like a kid, but it's very difficult from me. 5 months have nearly passed, still I'm unable to forget her. Her pics, her texts, everything deleting, still I can't stop thinking about her. I didn't get any closure too.
Just ranting out here, such a big exam I'm preparing for, being a lone general boy of a middle class family, so many responsibilities on me and I'm still into her 🙂💔

TL;DR Got scammed out of a $50 ‘application fee’ for an apartment for my son. Police report made.
I put a post on a local Facebook group page looking for an apartment for my son. I received several private messages shortly after.
One woman sent me pics of a decent place near his job with a realistic price. Gave me landlords name and number.
I texted him and started the process. He sent my son an application which he filled out and I cashapp the fee to him.
He then asked me to send the security deposit. I’m not that stupid. Although I haven’t rented an apartment since before internet, I was in no way going to send him the security deposit. So I told him I’m going to look at the apartment, then if we take it, will sign the lease and give the security deposit.
He left it alone until the day of the viewing. And I left telling him I’m on my way. He again asked for the security deposit so he can give me a receipt so he can give me the keys upon viewing and I said no again. He told me if I chose not to take the apartment, he will refund me. I at least didn’t fall for that.
Got to the apartment and no one there. Waited half hour. I texted and he didn’t answer and when I called, realized I was blocked.
Boy was I pissed! Figured the Facebook lady and ‘landlord’ were same person. It threw me off because she was a Facebook member for a few years and had friends and everything.
So I requested a refund from cashapp and made a police report and then had some fun with the Facebook lady then blocked. Police told me it’s a double scam to get my sons id and ssn, but my son told me the application didn’t even ask for his ssn thank god! If he’s running 30 scams and gets just a few people to fall for it then he’s making a lot of money.
Irritated at myself for falling for that but haven’t done the apartment thing in about 30 years!
Theres a scam for everything now it seems. Ugh

After a dreaded update, my Samsung text has begun using sms/mms texting. I cannot send or receive pictures. I've read enough help sections and viewed YouTube videos for answers but to no avail. I feel like I've tried everything. A rep at my FedEx office said she's experiencing the same. Any suggestions? BTW it's a crappy Ao3s.

My boyfriend and I have been together 3 years. We have a baby together and other kids among us. I should add I thought he was perfect. I’m in my 30s and I thought I had finally found someone for me. He treats me like a princess, hard worker, great with the kids. I don’t know why but I had a dream and with my crazy past I decided to go through his phone. He had recently (like less than a month ago it says it was created) made a profile on a website and PUT OUT AN ADD! Seeking feminine gay men or cross dressers. I’m obviously upset, and blind sided! He’s never given any hints. Idk why he couldn’t come to me. He’s denying it bad. He’s saying they were just “thoughts” he never acted on them blah blah. But I saw the messages. He sent pics, made plans, had a date as to when he’d get oral. He’s admitting he was “just curious, but couldn’t really do it” But again he’s lying. To me that’s also cheating. I had just texted him the one day expressing my appreciation for the great man he is and he went on about how he loves our family we created. Then an hour later…..he was texting a man sexually. 😳 He’s now begging for me to stay, saying he wants counseling for his lying. I’m trying to be compassionate and let him express his feeling towards the same sex but he’s just denying it. Saying no way, he don’t want it, he’s “sorry he had them thoughts”. I’m taking a separation rn obviously but what do I do? Can this be true? Is he really just gay and embarrassed about it? Why won’t he just admit he has bisexual tendencies (we’re very open and I also have been with both sexes, which he knows) Will he keep lying and sneaking? He’s saying he’ll do anything and he’s GOING to fix us no matter what I say. Like I said everything else is seemingly perfect but I’m so shocked and lost right now