How do i see someones friends on facebook
How To Get There (Philippines)
2018.04.11 17:14 epikotaku How To Get There (Philippines)
Ask the community and get the right directions wherever you like to go: Jeepneys, buses, tricycles, trains, UVs, and more!
2012.10.30 03:46 FarSizzle Make New Friends Here
This subreddit is for those who are looking to make some new friends on Reddit.
2010.02.19 17:00 sketchampm Rabbits: the intelligent, loving, and often misunderstood pet
/rabbits is an open community where users can learn, share cute pictures, or ask questions about rabbits. Please note we are a *pet rabbit* community that discourages breeding and encourages rescue.
2024.05.29 05:57 nuggetni to text (26F) or not to text your ex(24M) happy birthday?
I know I know, why are we even wasting 5minutes on an ex? I’ve just always opted to take the high road and show respect. I just can’t decide here.
our breakup from 4yrs was savage. a text from him and then some kind of no contact. he was always the first to ever reach out, but casually and briefly. he did end up chasing my siblings bestie after 2 months of “healing”. i mailed a birthday card with a gift card last year, even though we were already a few weeks split up. he thanked me for the gesture and for being me but, I think he mistook it bc he also mentioned we shouldn’t think to get back together—even though i didnt hint to it. I just knew how sad I felt readjusting, and wanted to still be kind on the last bday of his I thought I would acknowledge. unfortunately, when my birthday came around a few months later, he did not reach out… maybe at that time he was still riding the high of a rebound, and only now he’s actually starting to feel remorse and process the break up.
that leads me to today. part of me feels like I should match his energy and not greet, but I would feel guilty. I don’t want to start convo, but I don’t want it to be assumed unkind to ignore the day. maybe im not completely ready to bury it. he has since apologized at the end of last year and once more a month ago. I will attach his latest apology. he was definitely the villain in the end, but after seeing this second go round of apologies, although we’re kind of no contact still, I kind of want to greet him—in case he’s really changed and to the least deserving of acknowledgement.
pros and cons of texting? will I look silly or send mixed signals? he’s probably still with the other girl, so I could be made a fool of for texting ex happy birthday… but he’s the one still with his rebound yet offering me sweet nothings.
im not sure if his reaching out again was closure for him, or if passively putting the ball in my park.
some of his apology
^( It’s not just today, it’s anytime I think of how I could’ve been better tbh. It’s when I notice what I’m doing now and I catch myself later on being sad and recognizing if only I could’ve been that way with you when you needed me to be.)
^( I know I caused so much hurt and pain for so long you didn’t deserve that from me. It’s not guilt or apologizes that you bring by mentioning this it’s just the truth. What my heart feels and it’s because deep down inside through all of it all there’s love and will always be love for you. For who you were to me and the girl that I wanted to be with and was with. But I guess that’s life )
^(no this is not some sad feel sorry for me but more you deserve to know that I know I messed up in a lot of things and I’ve recognized it. You learn from your mistakes in life and you just have to be better and that’s all I’m hoping for to never hurt someone I loved and loved me like you did ever again.)
^(I’m just honestly grateful that you do not hate me. Your love was pure and kind. The memories and times we had are real and I think that at the times were we had so many storms I just wasn’t strong enough or ready. And I’m sorry I hope you know that things always remind me of you of us and it’s hard. I do hope and always wish for the best for you and just hope that you are okay.)
^(And I say that genuinely with a heavy heart that knows what I did to you and wishes that it could’ve been better for us. I took you for granted is the truth.)
Do I text because maybe deep down I’m trying to also keep the memory alive? Or maybe he’d prefer I didn’t reach out, advice please!
submitted by nuggetni to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
our breakup from 4yrs was savage. a text from him and then some kind of no contact. he was always the first to ever reach out, but casually and briefly. he did end up chasing my siblings bestie after 2 months of “healing”. i mailed a birthday card with a gift card last year, even though we were already a few weeks split up. he thanked me for the gesture and for being me but, I think he mistook it bc he also mentioned we shouldn’t think to get back together—even though i didnt hint to it. I just knew how sad I felt readjusting, and wanted to still be kind on the last bday of his I thought I would acknowledge. unfortunately, when my birthday came around a few months later, he did not reach out… maybe at that time he was still riding the high of a rebound, and only now he’s actually starting to feel remorse and process the break up.
that leads me to today. part of me feels like I should match his energy and not greet, but I would feel guilty. I don’t want to start convo, but I don’t want it to be assumed unkind to ignore the day. maybe im not completely ready to bury it. he has since apologized at the end of last year and once more a month ago. I will attach his latest apology. he was definitely the villain in the end, but after seeing this second go round of apologies, although we’re kind of no contact still, I kind of want to greet him—in case he’s really changed and to the least deserving of acknowledgement.
pros and cons of texting? will I look silly or send mixed signals? he’s probably still with the other girl, so I could be made a fool of for texting ex happy birthday… but he’s the one still with his rebound yet offering me sweet nothings.
im not sure if his reaching out again was closure for him, or if passively putting the ball in my park.
some of his apology
^( It’s not just today, it’s anytime I think of how I could’ve been better tbh. It’s when I notice what I’m doing now and I catch myself later on being sad and recognizing if only I could’ve been that way with you when you needed me to be.)
^( I know I caused so much hurt and pain for so long you didn’t deserve that from me. It’s not guilt or apologizes that you bring by mentioning this it’s just the truth. What my heart feels and it’s because deep down inside through all of it all there’s love and will always be love for you. For who you were to me and the girl that I wanted to be with and was with. But I guess that’s life )
^(no this is not some sad feel sorry for me but more you deserve to know that I know I messed up in a lot of things and I’ve recognized it. You learn from your mistakes in life and you just have to be better and that’s all I’m hoping for to never hurt someone I loved and loved me like you did ever again.)
^(I’m just honestly grateful that you do not hate me. Your love was pure and kind. The memories and times we had are real and I think that at the times were we had so many storms I just wasn’t strong enough or ready. And I’m sorry I hope you know that things always remind me of you of us and it’s hard. I do hope and always wish for the best for you and just hope that you are okay.)
^(And I say that genuinely with a heavy heart that knows what I did to you and wishes that it could’ve been better for us. I took you for granted is the truth.)
Do I text because maybe deep down I’m trying to also keep the memory alive? Or maybe he’d prefer I didn’t reach out, advice please!
2024.05.29 05:56 Joonken PSA: Never login on the XIVonMac Unofficial Launcher on another person's computer; unless you know exactly what you're doing.
Please note that this concern is regarding specifically to logging into FFXIV through the unofficial XoM launcher, on a device that you are not the owner of (i.e. you go to your friend's house and login through their computer for whatever reason)/
Title.
Why: As of writing, the XIV on Mac launcher automatically saves your Square Enix ID and Password on the device when you attempt to login, whether you want it to or not. This is not ideal when using someone else's device. Your username and password can be made visible in plain text by using the device's login credentials (basically by the owner of the device).
This is never told to the user. In fact, the ability to save your password is conveyed as a secure opt-in feature in their FAQs: "If you choose to save your credentials, XIV on Mac makes use of the macOS Keychain to securely store your password."
It seems that there are people that think enabling Auto-Login is what saves your credentials. It is not. To clarify, the Auto-Login toggle is literally nothing but an option to auto-click the Login button as soon as you open the launcher. It has absolutely nothing to do with saving your password.
To make matters worse, the launcher itself has no option to delete your saved credentials (how to manually delete them below).
To be fair, this is an unfortunate circumstance in how both macOS and FFXIV handles login credentials. If you want the ability to save your password for FFXIV, this is seemingly the only secure way. It is also a non-issue if you are the sole user of the Mac, and never login through XIV on Mac on another person's Mac. However, the problem is obviously concerning whenever you or someone else logs into FFXIV through this launcher, on a device they do not own.
I also found it very concerning that when I raised the issue to the XIV on Mac Support through their Discord, I got a weird mix of not understanding my concern in the first place, and willfully ignoring it. I was basically told that it was a non-issue because you should be using OTP. Which would in fact circumvent the issue, provided that you are not also using your FFXIV credentials elsewhere. Not to mention that there are inevitably going to be people that do not use OTP, since it is not mandatory.
After some more back and forth and understanding the unfortunate circumstance of the macOS and FFXIV login systems making it this way, I recommended that an easy removal of credentials inside the app and/or a disclaimer, notice, or warning for the user was warranted. However, in the end, I was told that I'm being absurd, trolling, insulting, and ignorant. For some reason, they seemed to be hyper-focused on the device owner effectively being the only user, which again, is then a non-issue and completely secure, but also completely irrelevant to the concern I raised.
So, take this PSA how you will, whether or not it will even affect you, or anyone at all. Figured that I'd post this just in case that this is applicable to you, which is realistically an extremely small chance. So maybe this entire thing is pointless.
The real PSA: always use unique login credentials for all your accounts, and turn on two-factor authentication (OTP). If everybody always did this, I wouldn't be making this post.
TL;DR: XoM by default saves your credentials without telling you, no simple way to delete it, which can be an issue when using another person's device. Raised the concern to XoM support, was told that I'm crazy, while ignoring the key part 'when using another person's device'.
.
How to manually delete your username and password for XIV on Mac: Open "Keychain Access.app" (not to be confused with iCloud Keychain) that is found in your Applications -> Utilities folder (or just spotlight search it). Go to the Login tab on the left menu bar. Find secure.square-enix.com for your account and delete it. Deleting the entry can be done without the device credentials.
An alternative method is to just reattempt to login with a nonsense password, as a failed login attempt will still save and update your credentials that are saved on the device. However, this does not remove the Square Enix ID that is saved, if that matters to you.
submitted by Joonken to ffxiv [link] [comments]
Title.
Why: As of writing, the XIV on Mac launcher automatically saves your Square Enix ID and Password on the device when you attempt to login, whether you want it to or not. This is not ideal when using someone else's device. Your username and password can be made visible in plain text by using the device's login credentials (basically by the owner of the device).
This is never told to the user. In fact, the ability to save your password is conveyed as a secure opt-in feature in their FAQs: "If you choose to save your credentials, XIV on Mac makes use of the macOS Keychain to securely store your password."
It seems that there are people that think enabling Auto-Login is what saves your credentials. It is not. To clarify, the Auto-Login toggle is literally nothing but an option to auto-click the Login button as soon as you open the launcher. It has absolutely nothing to do with saving your password.
To make matters worse, the launcher itself has no option to delete your saved credentials (how to manually delete them below).
To be fair, this is an unfortunate circumstance in how both macOS and FFXIV handles login credentials. If you want the ability to save your password for FFXIV, this is seemingly the only secure way. It is also a non-issue if you are the sole user of the Mac, and never login through XIV on Mac on another person's Mac. However, the problem is obviously concerning whenever you or someone else logs into FFXIV through this launcher, on a device they do not own.
I also found it very concerning that when I raised the issue to the XIV on Mac Support through their Discord, I got a weird mix of not understanding my concern in the first place, and willfully ignoring it. I was basically told that it was a non-issue because you should be using OTP. Which would in fact circumvent the issue, provided that you are not also using your FFXIV credentials elsewhere. Not to mention that there are inevitably going to be people that do not use OTP, since it is not mandatory.
After some more back and forth and understanding the unfortunate circumstance of the macOS and FFXIV login systems making it this way, I recommended that an easy removal of credentials inside the app and/or a disclaimer, notice, or warning for the user was warranted. However, in the end, I was told that I'm being absurd, trolling, insulting, and ignorant. For some reason, they seemed to be hyper-focused on the device owner effectively being the only user, which again, is then a non-issue and completely secure, but also completely irrelevant to the concern I raised.
So, take this PSA how you will, whether or not it will even affect you, or anyone at all. Figured that I'd post this just in case that this is applicable to you, which is realistically an extremely small chance. So maybe this entire thing is pointless.
The real PSA: always use unique login credentials for all your accounts, and turn on two-factor authentication (OTP). If everybody always did this, I wouldn't be making this post.
TL;DR: XoM by default saves your credentials without telling you, no simple way to delete it, which can be an issue when using another person's device. Raised the concern to XoM support, was told that I'm crazy, while ignoring the key part 'when using another person's device'.
.
How to manually delete your username and password for XIV on Mac: Open "Keychain Access.app" (not to be confused with iCloud Keychain) that is found in your Applications -> Utilities folder (or just spotlight search it). Go to the Login tab on the left menu bar. Find secure.square-enix.com for your account and delete it. Deleting the entry can be done without the device credentials.
An alternative method is to just reattempt to login with a nonsense password, as a failed login attempt will still save and update your credentials that are saved on the device. However, this does not remove the Square Enix ID that is saved, if that matters to you.
2024.05.29 05:56 Fillasophical Need hope
For about 2 years I have done nothing. I have been unemployed and have had an income through government supports which i no longer have and have lost my house my cats and my girlfriend. In December I stopped taking my medications because I was sure they were causing my issues. It seems like all my issues sky rocketed once I took risperidone for a few months. I feel like I have no personality, no thoughts, no feelings, except rage and distress. My life feels like a constant state of being in agony in my mind. I read and read and read and all I come to find is that apathy is permanent and you can't get rid of it. If this is the case why should I keep on living. What life is this? I can't do anything because I don't know what to do or rather I think why do anything. If my existence as a human is lacking the part what makes it a human experience then why do I exist. My whole life ive been babied. Mother paying my bills when I cant and making appointments for me and what not.
Ive spent so much time on NPD or ASPD or schizoid or AvPD that I'm convinced I have some sort of cluster b personality disorder and all I can think of is why would I even try to live my life when I am nothing more than a walking pathology and don't really have a personality just a brain that works off IF statements like a line of code.
People get to experience life without having to second guess themselves all the time but that's the only thing I can do, to the point where i simply don't do anything because I'm not really doing anything I'm just acting.
I cold turkeryed lamotragine, sertraline and this other medications for sleep, I can't even remember what I was on and now I feel like I have brain damage. I can't think I can't enjoy anything I cant feel love for anyone, but I also wonder if I ever did. And it's debilitating, I constantly wonder If I ever was someone with a "soul" or if I have always been just a robot with a reactionary function to the world. If this person says this then say this back. Everything seems so fake and unreal and I honestly think I have a block in-between my brain and reality.
When I got evicted I moved into my friends parents place where he stays and now I'm stuck and can't stand it anymore. Was he even my friend though or just someone who also partied alot. I don't want to be around people I don't want to have to explain to these Christians that I can't just go to church and be cured and that my depression is a choice. For the past 2 years I've been stuck in some purgatory state and it doesn't make any sense how any living being could even feel this way. It's literally hell on earth.
I cant move out because I don't have an income and I can't get an income because in all honesty If I had a job I would quit after a week. 1 year ago I almost had a job and I did an interview and the first day of work on the way there I turned around went home and blocked all the phone numbers associated with it.
I cant get supports because by the time I'm half way through the process I realize nothing matters reality isn't real my thoughts are fake I'm a psychopath anyway so why would I bother. I applied in December and didn't follow up and just did it again. 2 weeks ago.
When I graduated in 2019 I was drinking every weekend and in 2021 started trying drugs with my best friend, we did mushrooms and acid a couple times and a few times molly on the weekends. I've been drinking since grade 9, not every weekend but any chance I could, every party, every family event and holiday. Around 2020 I became a pothead and I would smoke insane amounts of weed, some days I smoked 3.5 grams a day some days I smoked 7 grams a day but more or less from 2020 to 2023 I would smoke non stop with no breaks unless around peopoe who disaproved, waking up in the night to smoke ,sometimes twice. I also took shrooms every like 3 months for a year or so and would be able to say that I've done them 3 times a year atleast from 2020 to 2023. All while being on these meds that I have been convince are neurotoxic and designed to give you brain damage. Oh and I've tried cocaine 3 times in the last year aswell. Never did much of it tho.
So I've lost all hope in living a life that is human. I feel void of myself I don't know who I am, I constantly feel like I'm pretending and acting to be human and can't connect with anyone and they would never know I feel this way.
The past 2 years I have don't nothing but sit at home with my blinds closed and hope no one is going to knock on my door as I sit for I hours a day staring at my phone googling and resding reddit and coming to the conclusion that I have some sort of psychosis or skitzophrenia or paranoia. My friends will call and I'll watch it ring until it stops and won't reply to my family. Because whats the point in trying to be human when I am no longer a human thanks to the cognitive issues I have to face.
And there's no hope online. You have anhedonia? It's the same everywhere I look, people replying to other people's posts or articles with "same here been 20 years now." So what's the point. How am I to know if it's depression or ASPD or NPD or Permanent Apathy from being chronically staring at my phone since I was 14 and watching gore and porn since I was that age. There's no knowing, there's no certainty in my own cognition or personality, not that i have one anymore. It's like do I have this cluster b? Who knows because if I did I wouldn't let a therapist know because I'm scared I do so I don't touch on it. Everything is a loop and a pardox of mental illnesses. I should have never read anything and I could have just been like "yup I'm depressed" now I have to worry if I should even try.
I moved to this place I'm in in december and just threw all my belongings in a room and I walked over everything until a couple weeks ago I threw out thousands of dollars worth of stuff because it's in the way and I dont have my own place anymore so things don't have a designated place. Threw out my computer, my tv, my model cars and all the model building supplies I had, airbrushes compressors hundreds of paints and brushes and clamps and just so much shit because those are people things let alone the human aspect of putting them somewhere.
Now I have cloths and a phone so running away will be easier. But where to go? Food costs money, I'm just tired of not feeling like a human and realizing everything I owned was just part of the act anyway. I don't feel anything. I don't feel anything. I don't feel anything. I don't feel anything. It's all that goes through my head all day long even if I did I wouldn't know it because I'm too far gone and it would be second guessed. I've now hyperfocused on the fact that laying down and staring at my phone for 2 years straight has, if not amplified, solidified my brain damage beyond repair. Because I feel nothing all day I just stare at my phone. But I can't do that anymore because now I'm expected to be a human in this household that I no longer want to be in. I'm completely isolated and I prefer that but I don't but I do but I don't but I do. It's like I want to be able to have friends and connect with someone but that's impossible because I'm just some empty emotionless husk with pure apathy and so I don't know what to do anymore.
I could get back on meds but isn't that the cause of this. The chemical lobotomy at its finest, causing you to need more of itself.
I dont see any hope anywhere because I want to be someone who has emotions but I have none and I want to be someone who has a human experience but I am not one. What do I do? Suicide? No there's ways to cope. I don't want to cope. What the fuck? You think coping with hell on earth is better than dieing? Why would I cope when all I have then is to look around at the world going "oh look that person feels this, thats something I can't do" because that's all that goes in inside.
I just say what I think someone is expecting to hear and then I think we'll isn't that what everyone is doing? Their all saying the same shit anyway but then I think we'll no they say what they say because they feel a certain way. Something I can't do, feel. Because im a sociopath. Being out if this household could help I'm sure but that's not even fathomable. Even with supports at max I can't afford a ppace of my own. I'd have to rent a room with a stranger, but it's funny because even those who aren't strangers are strangers now.
I shower once a week because why would I shower that's a human thing. I am not human anymore. I am void of humanity.
23 and dead. Who would have thought.
No one understands any of this so I just say I'm depressed and they think i shoukd try therapy and meds. Whats that going to do? Give my sociopathic brain the ability to not be a sociopath? If only they knew what distress and pain I feel every second of every day.
Ontop of all that even I was able to come back to myself it's just constant ocd of where should I place this and when or what or where should I do and what's the most optimized way to do this or that and why is that there instead of here and how do I know if here or there is better.
So now I guess I'll go back on ssris, and go back to thinking I'm poisoning myself and then repeat this cycle until death.
I'm just gonna run away and start stealing to eat because nothing matters anyway
submitted by Fillasophical to anhedonia [link] [comments]
Ive spent so much time on NPD or ASPD or schizoid or AvPD that I'm convinced I have some sort of cluster b personality disorder and all I can think of is why would I even try to live my life when I am nothing more than a walking pathology and don't really have a personality just a brain that works off IF statements like a line of code.
People get to experience life without having to second guess themselves all the time but that's the only thing I can do, to the point where i simply don't do anything because I'm not really doing anything I'm just acting.
I cold turkeryed lamotragine, sertraline and this other medications for sleep, I can't even remember what I was on and now I feel like I have brain damage. I can't think I can't enjoy anything I cant feel love for anyone, but I also wonder if I ever did. And it's debilitating, I constantly wonder If I ever was someone with a "soul" or if I have always been just a robot with a reactionary function to the world. If this person says this then say this back. Everything seems so fake and unreal and I honestly think I have a block in-between my brain and reality.
When I got evicted I moved into my friends parents place where he stays and now I'm stuck and can't stand it anymore. Was he even my friend though or just someone who also partied alot. I don't want to be around people I don't want to have to explain to these Christians that I can't just go to church and be cured and that my depression is a choice. For the past 2 years I've been stuck in some purgatory state and it doesn't make any sense how any living being could even feel this way. It's literally hell on earth.
I cant move out because I don't have an income and I can't get an income because in all honesty If I had a job I would quit after a week. 1 year ago I almost had a job and I did an interview and the first day of work on the way there I turned around went home and blocked all the phone numbers associated with it.
I cant get supports because by the time I'm half way through the process I realize nothing matters reality isn't real my thoughts are fake I'm a psychopath anyway so why would I bother. I applied in December and didn't follow up and just did it again. 2 weeks ago.
When I graduated in 2019 I was drinking every weekend and in 2021 started trying drugs with my best friend, we did mushrooms and acid a couple times and a few times molly on the weekends. I've been drinking since grade 9, not every weekend but any chance I could, every party, every family event and holiday. Around 2020 I became a pothead and I would smoke insane amounts of weed, some days I smoked 3.5 grams a day some days I smoked 7 grams a day but more or less from 2020 to 2023 I would smoke non stop with no breaks unless around peopoe who disaproved, waking up in the night to smoke ,sometimes twice. I also took shrooms every like 3 months for a year or so and would be able to say that I've done them 3 times a year atleast from 2020 to 2023. All while being on these meds that I have been convince are neurotoxic and designed to give you brain damage. Oh and I've tried cocaine 3 times in the last year aswell. Never did much of it tho.
So I've lost all hope in living a life that is human. I feel void of myself I don't know who I am, I constantly feel like I'm pretending and acting to be human and can't connect with anyone and they would never know I feel this way.
The past 2 years I have don't nothing but sit at home with my blinds closed and hope no one is going to knock on my door as I sit for I hours a day staring at my phone googling and resding reddit and coming to the conclusion that I have some sort of psychosis or skitzophrenia or paranoia. My friends will call and I'll watch it ring until it stops and won't reply to my family. Because whats the point in trying to be human when I am no longer a human thanks to the cognitive issues I have to face.
And there's no hope online. You have anhedonia? It's the same everywhere I look, people replying to other people's posts or articles with "same here been 20 years now." So what's the point. How am I to know if it's depression or ASPD or NPD or Permanent Apathy from being chronically staring at my phone since I was 14 and watching gore and porn since I was that age. There's no knowing, there's no certainty in my own cognition or personality, not that i have one anymore. It's like do I have this cluster b? Who knows because if I did I wouldn't let a therapist know because I'm scared I do so I don't touch on it. Everything is a loop and a pardox of mental illnesses. I should have never read anything and I could have just been like "yup I'm depressed" now I have to worry if I should even try.
I moved to this place I'm in in december and just threw all my belongings in a room and I walked over everything until a couple weeks ago I threw out thousands of dollars worth of stuff because it's in the way and I dont have my own place anymore so things don't have a designated place. Threw out my computer, my tv, my model cars and all the model building supplies I had, airbrushes compressors hundreds of paints and brushes and clamps and just so much shit because those are people things let alone the human aspect of putting them somewhere.
Now I have cloths and a phone so running away will be easier. But where to go? Food costs money, I'm just tired of not feeling like a human and realizing everything I owned was just part of the act anyway. I don't feel anything. I don't feel anything. I don't feel anything. I don't feel anything. It's all that goes through my head all day long even if I did I wouldn't know it because I'm too far gone and it would be second guessed. I've now hyperfocused on the fact that laying down and staring at my phone for 2 years straight has, if not amplified, solidified my brain damage beyond repair. Because I feel nothing all day I just stare at my phone. But I can't do that anymore because now I'm expected to be a human in this household that I no longer want to be in. I'm completely isolated and I prefer that but I don't but I do but I don't but I do. It's like I want to be able to have friends and connect with someone but that's impossible because I'm just some empty emotionless husk with pure apathy and so I don't know what to do anymore.
I could get back on meds but isn't that the cause of this. The chemical lobotomy at its finest, causing you to need more of itself.
I dont see any hope anywhere because I want to be someone who has emotions but I have none and I want to be someone who has a human experience but I am not one. What do I do? Suicide? No there's ways to cope. I don't want to cope. What the fuck? You think coping with hell on earth is better than dieing? Why would I cope when all I have then is to look around at the world going "oh look that person feels this, thats something I can't do" because that's all that goes in inside.
I just say what I think someone is expecting to hear and then I think we'll isn't that what everyone is doing? Their all saying the same shit anyway but then I think we'll no they say what they say because they feel a certain way. Something I can't do, feel. Because im a sociopath. Being out if this household could help I'm sure but that's not even fathomable. Even with supports at max I can't afford a ppace of my own. I'd have to rent a room with a stranger, but it's funny because even those who aren't strangers are strangers now.
I shower once a week because why would I shower that's a human thing. I am not human anymore. I am void of humanity.
23 and dead. Who would have thought.
No one understands any of this so I just say I'm depressed and they think i shoukd try therapy and meds. Whats that going to do? Give my sociopathic brain the ability to not be a sociopath? If only they knew what distress and pain I feel every second of every day.
Ontop of all that even I was able to come back to myself it's just constant ocd of where should I place this and when or what or where should I do and what's the most optimized way to do this or that and why is that there instead of here and how do I know if here or there is better.
So now I guess I'll go back on ssris, and go back to thinking I'm poisoning myself and then repeat this cycle until death.
I'm just gonna run away and start stealing to eat because nothing matters anyway
2024.05.29 05:56 embryonic_journey 10
The last time I was drunk was the Tuesday after Memorial Day in 2014. Around 11:30 PM, I dramatically up-ended a bottle in the sink and told my spouse I needed help.
SD was one of the places I turned to for help on Wednesday. I'd found SD during one of my many attempts to cut back. I'd occasionally lurk while I was having a drunken, late-night pity party. I could string together a few days clean, moderate for a bit, but my overall drinking spiraled further and further out of control over those years.
SD was an essential tool in helping me get through the first few days and weeks once I stopped. The support, understanding, and knowledge here were invaluable. Seeing someone with a little more time and what they were going through prepared me for the next phases. Those folks with unimaginably large numbers in their badges--triple digits! months!! years!!?--who helped pull others onto the life raft became my heroes, mentors, and, in some cases, friends.
SD grew and changed. I grew and changed. My participation may have decreased, but my appreciation for this place never waned.
I'm here to celebrate, sure, but mostly, I'm here today to say THANK YOU.
I'm here to say that what you are doing can be challenging. Maybe it's the hardest thing you will do in life. Maybe it's not bad, and you just need a bit of additional support. No matter how challenging it is for you to stop drinking, IT IS SO WORTH IT. Stay strong in your individual journeys, and stay strong as a community.
submitted by embryonic_journey to stopdrinking [link] [comments]
SD was one of the places I turned to for help on Wednesday. I'd found SD during one of my many attempts to cut back. I'd occasionally lurk while I was having a drunken, late-night pity party. I could string together a few days clean, moderate for a bit, but my overall drinking spiraled further and further out of control over those years.
SD was an essential tool in helping me get through the first few days and weeks once I stopped. The support, understanding, and knowledge here were invaluable. Seeing someone with a little more time and what they were going through prepared me for the next phases. Those folks with unimaginably large numbers in their badges--triple digits! months!! years!!?--who helped pull others onto the life raft became my heroes, mentors, and, in some cases, friends.
SD grew and changed. I grew and changed. My participation may have decreased, but my appreciation for this place never waned.
I'm here to celebrate, sure, but mostly, I'm here today to say THANK YOU.
I'm here to say that what you are doing can be challenging. Maybe it's the hardest thing you will do in life. Maybe it's not bad, and you just need a bit of additional support. No matter how challenging it is for you to stop drinking, IT IS SO WORTH IT. Stay strong in your individual journeys, and stay strong as a community.
2024.05.29 05:56 Fillasophical Need hope
For about 2 years I have done nothing. I have been unemployed and have had an income through government supports which i no longer have and have lost my house my cats and my girlfriend. In December I stopped taking my medications because I was sure they were causing my issues. It seems like all my issues sky rocketed once I took risperidone for a few months. I feel like I have no personality, no thoughts, no feelings, except rage and distress. My life feels like a constant state of being in agony in my mind. I read and read and read and all I come to find is that apathy is permanent and you can't get rid of it. If this is the case why should I keep on living. What life is this? I can't do anything because I don't know what to do or rather I think why do anything. If my existence as a human is lacking the part what makes it a human experience then why do I exist. My whole life ive been babied. Mother paying my bills when I cant and making appointments for me and what not.
Ive spent so much time on NPD or ASPD or schizoid or AvPD that I'm convinced I have some sort of cluster b personality disorder and all I can think of is why would I even try to live my life when I am nothing more than a walking pathology and don't really have a personality just a brain that works off IF statements like a line of code.
People get to experience life without having to second guess themselves all the time but that's the only thing I can do, to the point where i simply don't do anything because I'm not really doing anything I'm just acting.
I cold turkeryed lamotragine, sertraline and this other medications for sleep, I can't even remember what I was on and now I feel like I have brain damage. I can't think I can't enjoy anything I cant feel love for anyone, but I also wonder if I ever did. And it's debilitating, I constantly wonder If I ever was someone with a "soul" or if I have always been just a robot with a reactionary function to the world. If this person says this then say this back. Everything seems so fake and unreal and I honestly think I have a block in-between my brain and reality.
When I got evicted I moved into my friends parents place where he stays and now I'm stuck and can't stand it anymore. Was he even my friend though or just someone who also partied alot. I don't want to be around people I don't want to have to explain to these Christians that I can't just go to church and be cured and that my depression is a choice. For the past 2 years I've been stuck in some purgatory state and it doesn't make any sense how any living being could even feel this way. It's literally hell on earth.
I cant move out because I don't have an income and I can't get an income because in all honesty If I had a job I would quit after a week. 1 year ago I almost had a job and I did an interview and the first day of work on the way there I turned around went home and blocked all the phone numbers associated with it.
I cant get supports because by the time I'm half way through the process I realize nothing matters reality isn't real my thoughts are fake I'm a psychopath anyway so why would I bother. I applied in December and didn't follow up and just did it again. 2 weeks ago.
When I graduated in 2019 I was drinking every weekend and in 2021 started trying drugs with my best friend, we did mushrooms and acid a couple times and a few times molly on the weekends. I've been drinking since grade 9, not every weekend but any chance I could, every party, every family event and holiday. Around 2020 I became a pothead and I would smoke insane amounts of weed, some days I smoked 3.5 grams a day some days I smoked 7 grams a day but more or less from 2020 to 2023 I would smoke non stop with no breaks unless around peopoe who disaproved, waking up in the night to smoke ,sometimes twice. I also took shrooms every like 3 months for a year or so and would be able to say that I've done them 3 times a year atleast from 2020 to 2023. All while being on these meds that I have been convince are neurotoxic and designed to give you brain damage. Oh and I've tried cocaine 3 times in the last year aswell. Never did much of it tho.
So I've lost all hope in living a life that is human. I feel void of myself I don't know who I am, I constantly feel like I'm pretending and acting to be human and can't connect with anyone and they would never know I feel this way.
The past 2 years I have don't nothing but sit at home with my blinds closed and hope no one is going to knock on my door as I sit for I hours a day staring at my phone googling and resding reddit and coming to the conclusion that I have some sort of psychosis or skitzophrenia or paranoia. My friends will call and I'll watch it ring until it stops and won't reply to my family. Because whats the point in trying to be human when I am no longer a human thanks to the cognitive issues I have to face.
And there's no hope online. You have anhedonia? It's the same everywhere I look, people replying to other people's posts or articles with "same here been 20 years now." So what's the point. How am I to know if it's depression or ASPD or NPD or Permanent Apathy from being chronically staring at my phone since I was 14 and watching gore and porn since I was that age. There's no knowing, there's no certainty in my own cognition or personality, not that i have one anymore. It's like do I have this cluster b? Who knows because if I did I wouldn't let a therapist know because I'm scared I do so I don't touch on it. Everything is a loop and a pardox of mental illnesses. I should have never read anything and I could have just been like "yup I'm depressed" now I have to worry if I should even try.
I moved to this place I'm in in december and just threw all my belongings in a room and I walked over everything until a couple weeks ago I threw out thousands of dollars worth of stuff because it's in the way and I dont have my own place anymore so things don't have a designated place. Threw out my computer, my tv, my model cars and all the model building supplies I had, airbrushes compressors hundreds of paints and brushes and clamps and just so much shit because those are people things let alone the human aspect of putting them somewhere.
Now I have cloths and a phone so running away will be easier. But where to go? Food costs money, I'm just tired of not feeling like a human and realizing everything I owned was just part of the act anyway. I don't feel anything. I don't feel anything. I don't feel anything. I don't feel anything. It's all that goes through my head all day long even if I did I wouldn't know it because I'm too far gone and it would be second guessed. I've now hyperfocused on the fact that laying down and staring at my phone for 2 years straight has, if not amplified, solidified my brain damage beyond repair. Because I feel nothing all day I just stare at my phone. But I can't do that anymore because now I'm expected to be a human in this household that I no longer want to be in. I'm completely isolated and I prefer that but I don't but I do but I don't but I do. It's like I want to be able to have friends and connect with someone but that's impossible because I'm just some empty emotionless husk with pure apathy and so I don't know what to do anymore.
I could get back on meds but isn't that the cause of this. The chemical lobotomy at its finest, causing you to need more of itself.
I dont see any hope anywhere because I want to be someone who has emotions but I have none and I want to be someone who has a human experience but I am not one. What do I do? Suicide? No there's ways to cope. I don't want to cope. What the fuck? You think coping with hell on earth is better than dieing? Why would I cope when all I have then is to look around at the world going "oh look that person feels this, thats something I can't do" because that's all that goes in inside.
I just say what I think someone is expecting to hear and then I think we'll isn't that what everyone is doing? Their all saying the same shit anyway but then I think we'll no they say what they say because they feel a certain way. Something I can't do, feel. Because im a sociopath. Being out if this household could help I'm sure but that's not even fathomable. Even with supports at max I can't afford a ppace of my own. I'd have to rent a room with a stranger, but it's funny because even those who aren't strangers are strangers now.
I shower once a week because why would I shower that's a human thing. I am not human anymore. I am void of humanity.
23 and dead. Who would have thought.
No one understands any of this so I just say I'm depressed and they think i shoukd try therapy and meds. Whats that going to do? Give my sociopathic brain the ability to not be a sociopath? If only they knew what distress and pain I feel every second of every day.
Ontop of all that even I was able to come back to myself it's just constant ocd of where should I place this and when or what or where should I do and what's the most optimized way to do this or that and why is that there instead of here and how do I know if here or there is better.
So now I guess I'll go back on ssris, and go back to thinking I'm poisoning myself and then repeat this cycle until death.
I'm just gonna run away and start stealing to eat because nothing matters anyway
submitted by Fillasophical to anhedonia [link] [comments]
Ive spent so much time on NPD or ASPD or schizoid or AvPD that I'm convinced I have some sort of cluster b personality disorder and all I can think of is why would I even try to live my life when I am nothing more than a walking pathology and don't really have a personality just a brain that works off IF statements like a line of code.
People get to experience life without having to second guess themselves all the time but that's the only thing I can do, to the point where i simply don't do anything because I'm not really doing anything I'm just acting.
I cold turkeryed lamotragine, sertraline and this other medications for sleep, I can't even remember what I was on and now I feel like I have brain damage. I can't think I can't enjoy anything I cant feel love for anyone, but I also wonder if I ever did. And it's debilitating, I constantly wonder If I ever was someone with a "soul" or if I have always been just a robot with a reactionary function to the world. If this person says this then say this back. Everything seems so fake and unreal and I honestly think I have a block in-between my brain and reality.
When I got evicted I moved into my friends parents place where he stays and now I'm stuck and can't stand it anymore. Was he even my friend though or just someone who also partied alot. I don't want to be around people I don't want to have to explain to these Christians that I can't just go to church and be cured and that my depression is a choice. For the past 2 years I've been stuck in some purgatory state and it doesn't make any sense how any living being could even feel this way. It's literally hell on earth.
I cant move out because I don't have an income and I can't get an income because in all honesty If I had a job I would quit after a week. 1 year ago I almost had a job and I did an interview and the first day of work on the way there I turned around went home and blocked all the phone numbers associated with it.
I cant get supports because by the time I'm half way through the process I realize nothing matters reality isn't real my thoughts are fake I'm a psychopath anyway so why would I bother. I applied in December and didn't follow up and just did it again. 2 weeks ago.
When I graduated in 2019 I was drinking every weekend and in 2021 started trying drugs with my best friend, we did mushrooms and acid a couple times and a few times molly on the weekends. I've been drinking since grade 9, not every weekend but any chance I could, every party, every family event and holiday. Around 2020 I became a pothead and I would smoke insane amounts of weed, some days I smoked 3.5 grams a day some days I smoked 7 grams a day but more or less from 2020 to 2023 I would smoke non stop with no breaks unless around peopoe who disaproved, waking up in the night to smoke ,sometimes twice. I also took shrooms every like 3 months for a year or so and would be able to say that I've done them 3 times a year atleast from 2020 to 2023. All while being on these meds that I have been convince are neurotoxic and designed to give you brain damage. Oh and I've tried cocaine 3 times in the last year aswell. Never did much of it tho.
So I've lost all hope in living a life that is human. I feel void of myself I don't know who I am, I constantly feel like I'm pretending and acting to be human and can't connect with anyone and they would never know I feel this way.
The past 2 years I have don't nothing but sit at home with my blinds closed and hope no one is going to knock on my door as I sit for I hours a day staring at my phone googling and resding reddit and coming to the conclusion that I have some sort of psychosis or skitzophrenia or paranoia. My friends will call and I'll watch it ring until it stops and won't reply to my family. Because whats the point in trying to be human when I am no longer a human thanks to the cognitive issues I have to face.
And there's no hope online. You have anhedonia? It's the same everywhere I look, people replying to other people's posts or articles with "same here been 20 years now." So what's the point. How am I to know if it's depression or ASPD or NPD or Permanent Apathy from being chronically staring at my phone since I was 14 and watching gore and porn since I was that age. There's no knowing, there's no certainty in my own cognition or personality, not that i have one anymore. It's like do I have this cluster b? Who knows because if I did I wouldn't let a therapist know because I'm scared I do so I don't touch on it. Everything is a loop and a pardox of mental illnesses. I should have never read anything and I could have just been like "yup I'm depressed" now I have to worry if I should even try.
I moved to this place I'm in in december and just threw all my belongings in a room and I walked over everything until a couple weeks ago I threw out thousands of dollars worth of stuff because it's in the way and I dont have my own place anymore so things don't have a designated place. Threw out my computer, my tv, my model cars and all the model building supplies I had, airbrushes compressors hundreds of paints and brushes and clamps and just so much shit because those are people things let alone the human aspect of putting them somewhere.
Now I have cloths and a phone so running away will be easier. But where to go? Food costs money, I'm just tired of not feeling like a human and realizing everything I owned was just part of the act anyway. I don't feel anything. I don't feel anything. I don't feel anything. I don't feel anything. It's all that goes through my head all day long even if I did I wouldn't know it because I'm too far gone and it would be second guessed. I've now hyperfocused on the fact that laying down and staring at my phone for 2 years straight has, if not amplified, solidified my brain damage beyond repair. Because I feel nothing all day I just stare at my phone. But I can't do that anymore because now I'm expected to be a human in this household that I no longer want to be in. I'm completely isolated and I prefer that but I don't but I do but I don't but I do. It's like I want to be able to have friends and connect with someone but that's impossible because I'm just some empty emotionless husk with pure apathy and so I don't know what to do anymore.
I could get back on meds but isn't that the cause of this. The chemical lobotomy at its finest, causing you to need more of itself.
I dont see any hope anywhere because I want to be someone who has emotions but I have none and I want to be someone who has a human experience but I am not one. What do I do? Suicide? No there's ways to cope. I don't want to cope. What the fuck? You think coping with hell on earth is better than dieing? Why would I cope when all I have then is to look around at the world going "oh look that person feels this, thats something I can't do" because that's all that goes in inside.
I just say what I think someone is expecting to hear and then I think we'll isn't that what everyone is doing? Their all saying the same shit anyway but then I think we'll no they say what they say because they feel a certain way. Something I can't do, feel. Because im a sociopath. Being out if this household could help I'm sure but that's not even fathomable. Even with supports at max I can't afford a ppace of my own. I'd have to rent a room with a stranger, but it's funny because even those who aren't strangers are strangers now.
I shower once a week because why would I shower that's a human thing. I am not human anymore. I am void of humanity.
23 and dead. Who would have thought.
No one understands any of this so I just say I'm depressed and they think i shoukd try therapy and meds. Whats that going to do? Give my sociopathic brain the ability to not be a sociopath? If only they knew what distress and pain I feel every second of every day.
Ontop of all that even I was able to come back to myself it's just constant ocd of where should I place this and when or what or where should I do and what's the most optimized way to do this or that and why is that there instead of here and how do I know if here or there is better.
So now I guess I'll go back on ssris, and go back to thinking I'm poisoning myself and then repeat this cycle until death.
I'm just gonna run away and start stealing to eat because nothing matters anyway
2024.05.29 05:55 lilkorea_189 Packed up my life for a man only for our relationship to sour almost immediately
I, 35 female, had been in an on again off again relationship with my boyfriend, 45 male, for the last 3 years. I won't bore you with the details of how we met and what went on for the last 3 years of our relationship, I'm just going to get to the point.
Back in late September 2023, my boyfriend moved to Iowa. We had just gotten back together when he sprung that on me and I was rather upset at first but knew that he was only moving because it was for his mental health. Living in the big city can be very costly and stressful, so I understood his reasoning. I did not go with him and figured we would go our separate ways. Fast forward four months later and I get a message from him through Facebook messenger asking me to call him. I call him and learned rather quickly that he had been drinking but he was asking why I suddenly ghosted him by not replying back to his texts or calls. For context, I never blocked his number.
I told him that I did not get any of his texts or calls. He asked me why I never tried reaching out to him and I explained that I thought him moving away and not staying in contact meant the end of our relationship. We had a lengthy conversation that night and he asked me to come visit him. I told him that I will consider it but would need to build up some PTO as I had just started a new job and didn't want to risk anything during my first 90 days. We stayed in touch after that, calling each other daily and talking on the phone for hours just catching up and going over mutual interests and so on until I've built up enough PTO to go visit him.
You may wonder why I was the one to go visit him in Iowa. Firstly, he wanted me to see the town he had decided to settle in. Secondly, we had discussed resuming our relationship and possibly having me move out there as it was out of the question for him to move back to the city where I live. I understood his reasoning for moving but felt that leaving the life I have behind for him felt a bit extreme. But I kept an open mind about Iowa and went to visit (side note, there are no direct flights to where he moved to. I had to fly to Chicago, which is a 2.5 hour drive away and he had to rent a car to pick me up). I spent a four day weekend with him, and I'm not going to lie and say that it was magical and romantic because it's Iowa. Seeing him again, however, brought back all the feelings I had for him and I realized just how much I had missed him.
I honestly didn't see much during my visit as it wasn't a dense town like I would see back home, as everything was very spread out. That should have been my very first clue to the kind of life it was like. It was very quiet and peaceful, which was a change. Unlike the city where it was always busy and sirens going off in the distance was a constant, at night it's dead silent. It was definitely a change in pace and I was more or less charmed, but not impressed. My weekend visit was over before we knew it and I returned home back to the life I was most comfortable with.
My boyfriend and I resumed our daily phone calls, but I noticed our conversations began to shift towards me moving out to Iowa. And in truth I was swayed by the idea of leaving the big city for small town life, however, my biggest hesitation was job security. I work in the medical field and finding a job with my skill-sets wasn't a huge challenge aside from the lack of urgency of callbacks from the jobs I had applied to. My boyfriend reassured me that it was just how things were in Iowa, that unlike the city, the businesses moved through a system that was much slower than what I was used to. I had my doubts but then again I didn't know much about the hiring process in the mid-west. My boyfriend then said it would probably go a lot faster if I was actually in the area (which I was skeptical about but didn't comment). I knew he just wanted me there with him and, at that time, I wanted to be with him because I had truly believed that we had talked through our past issues and were now on the same wavelength of what we wanted as a couple moving forward.
Boy was I in for a rude awakening.
I literally packed up my life into my SUV. I didn't take any furniture with me knowing that what my boyfriend lacked we could always buy. It took me 3 days of driving to reach Iowa and I had never thought I'd be so happy to be in Iowa or all places, but I was. I was blinded by hopes and dreams of a happy life with the man I thought I was in love with. I should mention that I have been saving money for a down payment on a house for the last 5 years and have managed to save $20k. It has been a personal goal, not dream, for myself to be a homeowner, not because I want that white picket fence dream, but because I simply want a home that is truly MY home. I want a safe space that truly feels mine and have it reflect the type of person that I am, instead of apartments where I would have to return the space to the manufactured setting once I leave.
Now, the housing market in Iowa is relatively cheap compared to Washington. And when I saw the cheap listings, cheap as in less than $200k for a 3 bedroom 2 bath, move-in ready house I was ready to commit my new life in Iowa with my boyfriend. At first, my boyfriend was very supportive of my house hunting, he knew that it was personal goal of mine and had always said how he admired my ambition to become a home owner. I got in touch with a realtor agent who collaborated with me on what my boyfriend and I were looking for in a home. I probably saw about a dozen houses within my first 2 weeks since arriving to Iowa and I actually found a house that we both really liked. I was ready to put in an offer when my boyfriend suddenly told me that he didn't want to become a home owner, saying that it was too much of a commitment that he never wants to make.
It gave me pause, and though I was very disappointed in having to put aside a goal I made for myself, I half-heartedly agreed. It was then things started to unravel between us and his mood just quickly declined. I should note that my boyfriend has diagnosed PTSD from childhood trauma and he has a tendency to become anxious and agitated when stressed out. The days that followed I had noticed a shift in him and because he works from home, I just assumed it was because his work was stressing him out.
I tried to be a good girlfriend by staying out of his way while he was working and try to be as quiet as possible while at home. I would try to help out with small things like letting the dogs out to relieve themselves and take them on short walks. I tried to be mindful to not make a mess. Along with my boyfriend's anxiety and mental health struggles he also has OCD, and while back in Seattle I had noticed he liked to keep a clean home, out in Iowa it had become abundantly clear that the smallest mess would upset him.
His bad mood only worsened. One day, while he was folding laundry, I asked him if there was anything he'd like me to do around the house because I wanted to be helpful. He said "If you see a mess, clean it." That came off as truly strange to me.
"Do you want me to vacuum or clean the bathrooms?" I asked.
He looked at me like what I had asked was the dumbest question he had ever heard and snapped at me with: "If you see a mess, clean it. You're not 12 years old, you're not being paid an allowance to do simple chores. You're an adult, you should already know what to do."
What he said embarrassed me and made me feel so small and inferior, but it also truly angered me. Where was all this hostility suddenly coming from? I didn't want to start a fight over chores and simply helped him fold the laundry. We eventually had a talk, which turned into him going on a tangent about how he requires to keep a clean and sterile house, that "everything has its place" in the house. He then went on about not wanting the commitment of home ownership and that he has no intentions of ever returning to Seattle. He told me how all my stuff cluttering the bedroom and office is taking a toll on his mental health and that it's my job to make sure that they're all put away so he doesn't have to see them (mind you, I was still unpacking and with limited storage space the rest of my belongings are still packed away).
Then he suggested something that blindsided me. He suggested that I possibly look for my own place so that we live separately and slowly integrate into each other's lives again. It was then that I took account of all the red flags that had sprung up from before I foolishly packed up my life to be with this man that I suddenly no longer loved. It was as if a switch in me had been flipped and all those feelings of affection just left my system. I told him that what he was proposing wasn't possible because I was struggling to find employment and didn't want to waste my savings on a brand new lease, especially since I was just added onto his lease.
I tried to find a middle ground with him, especially when it came to my personal belongings. I knew that he was talking about my makeup being out on the counter. Mind you, my second day in Iowa, we had gone to Costco where I found a makeup organizer and purchased it. All my makeup fits neatly in it and isn't scattered all over the place, he just doesn't like seeing them. That still wasn't good enough for him but I had to point it out to him by saying "I live here, too. It's only fair that I should feel like this is my home."
After that, the tension between us only got worse. He would have angry outbursts over the smallest inconveniences and prioritize more on his "mental and physical health" than work on our rapidly deteriorating relationship. I'm also at fault for not trying harder to talk things out but after he suggested I find my own place I subconsciously knew our relationship was over, on top of that, I was also emotionally drained and feeling depressed.
Now moving to the present, I had finally secured a job that would be opening a clinic nearby, meaning I wouldn't have to waste gas as much and would finally be able to contribute financially to the household. When I told my boyfriend the news it was received with a rather lackluster response but I still held out hope that once I start working and be out of the house more things might mellow out. Then, over the weekend, everything fell apart.
I had woken up early because the dogs needed to go outside. I knew my boyfriend wasn't getting much sleep lately so I let him sleep in as much as possible. Once the dogs had finished relieving themselves I had the intention of going back to bed to get another hour or so of sleep but the dogs came in to disrupt that plan. My boyfriend didn't like that and got up explosively, cursing and yelling as he stomped downstairs about how he couldn't get any sleep. I go downstairs to tell him that he can go back to bed, that I forgot to feed the dogs after letting them outside and that I would take care of it. He yells at me that he would do it since he's up and then goes on a rant about how his life was disrupted ever since I arrived. Let me remind you that he wanted me there in the first place.
He blamed me for the poor sleep he's been having ever since I arrived (there is also 3 dogs sleeping in the bed with us). He blamed me for his financial woes (he took care of the bills until I found a job). He blamed me for the hit to his credit score (I took a hit as well because we were getting pre-approval for a home loan before he said he didn't want to move forward with it). Blamed me for the decline in his mental and physical health (he vapes throughout the day and his vices are scotch and ice cream). And he blamed me for his inability to focus on drawing his comic series because of his mental health decline (he's a decent artist but I can't take credit for his creative block).
While he listed off all the things I am to be blamed for and how he had made so many compromises for me I reflected back on my surprisingly short time here (3 weeks, nearing 4), I was the one who made all the compromises. I was the one who made the bigger sacrifice. I traveled half-way across the country for a man who will never make my happiness a priority. From the start of our relationship 3 years ago to now, I was the only one who had to make sacrifices just to pacify this giant man-child.
He brought up me finding my own place again and I told him that if I have to move out then I'm returning to Seattle. He didn't fight me on that but the downside is that I have to wait for my parents, who had planned to drive out this way in June from Seattle, to visit friends in Chicago. They've been made aware of the situation and will be driving out in my step-dad's pickup truck to haul back all of my belongings and we would leave together in both my step-dad;s truck and my SUV. I had emailed the hiring manager I had gone through my interview process with, letting her know that I unfortunately will be returning to Seattle due to personal circumstances.
In the meantime I have begun submitting my resume to clinics and hospitals back in Seattle and already have several interviews set up (much faster turn-around than Iowa) and hopefully soon I will have secured a job before my return home.
submitted by lilkorea_189 to BreakUps [link] [comments]
Back in late September 2023, my boyfriend moved to Iowa. We had just gotten back together when he sprung that on me and I was rather upset at first but knew that he was only moving because it was for his mental health. Living in the big city can be very costly and stressful, so I understood his reasoning. I did not go with him and figured we would go our separate ways. Fast forward four months later and I get a message from him through Facebook messenger asking me to call him. I call him and learned rather quickly that he had been drinking but he was asking why I suddenly ghosted him by not replying back to his texts or calls. For context, I never blocked his number.
I told him that I did not get any of his texts or calls. He asked me why I never tried reaching out to him and I explained that I thought him moving away and not staying in contact meant the end of our relationship. We had a lengthy conversation that night and he asked me to come visit him. I told him that I will consider it but would need to build up some PTO as I had just started a new job and didn't want to risk anything during my first 90 days. We stayed in touch after that, calling each other daily and talking on the phone for hours just catching up and going over mutual interests and so on until I've built up enough PTO to go visit him.
You may wonder why I was the one to go visit him in Iowa. Firstly, he wanted me to see the town he had decided to settle in. Secondly, we had discussed resuming our relationship and possibly having me move out there as it was out of the question for him to move back to the city where I live. I understood his reasoning for moving but felt that leaving the life I have behind for him felt a bit extreme. But I kept an open mind about Iowa and went to visit (side note, there are no direct flights to where he moved to. I had to fly to Chicago, which is a 2.5 hour drive away and he had to rent a car to pick me up). I spent a four day weekend with him, and I'm not going to lie and say that it was magical and romantic because it's Iowa. Seeing him again, however, brought back all the feelings I had for him and I realized just how much I had missed him.
I honestly didn't see much during my visit as it wasn't a dense town like I would see back home, as everything was very spread out. That should have been my very first clue to the kind of life it was like. It was very quiet and peaceful, which was a change. Unlike the city where it was always busy and sirens going off in the distance was a constant, at night it's dead silent. It was definitely a change in pace and I was more or less charmed, but not impressed. My weekend visit was over before we knew it and I returned home back to the life I was most comfortable with.
My boyfriend and I resumed our daily phone calls, but I noticed our conversations began to shift towards me moving out to Iowa. And in truth I was swayed by the idea of leaving the big city for small town life, however, my biggest hesitation was job security. I work in the medical field and finding a job with my skill-sets wasn't a huge challenge aside from the lack of urgency of callbacks from the jobs I had applied to. My boyfriend reassured me that it was just how things were in Iowa, that unlike the city, the businesses moved through a system that was much slower than what I was used to. I had my doubts but then again I didn't know much about the hiring process in the mid-west. My boyfriend then said it would probably go a lot faster if I was actually in the area (which I was skeptical about but didn't comment). I knew he just wanted me there with him and, at that time, I wanted to be with him because I had truly believed that we had talked through our past issues and were now on the same wavelength of what we wanted as a couple moving forward.
Boy was I in for a rude awakening.
I literally packed up my life into my SUV. I didn't take any furniture with me knowing that what my boyfriend lacked we could always buy. It took me 3 days of driving to reach Iowa and I had never thought I'd be so happy to be in Iowa or all places, but I was. I was blinded by hopes and dreams of a happy life with the man I thought I was in love with. I should mention that I have been saving money for a down payment on a house for the last 5 years and have managed to save $20k. It has been a personal goal, not dream, for myself to be a homeowner, not because I want that white picket fence dream, but because I simply want a home that is truly MY home. I want a safe space that truly feels mine and have it reflect the type of person that I am, instead of apartments where I would have to return the space to the manufactured setting once I leave.
Now, the housing market in Iowa is relatively cheap compared to Washington. And when I saw the cheap listings, cheap as in less than $200k for a 3 bedroom 2 bath, move-in ready house I was ready to commit my new life in Iowa with my boyfriend. At first, my boyfriend was very supportive of my house hunting, he knew that it was personal goal of mine and had always said how he admired my ambition to become a home owner. I got in touch with a realtor agent who collaborated with me on what my boyfriend and I were looking for in a home. I probably saw about a dozen houses within my first 2 weeks since arriving to Iowa and I actually found a house that we both really liked. I was ready to put in an offer when my boyfriend suddenly told me that he didn't want to become a home owner, saying that it was too much of a commitment that he never wants to make.
It gave me pause, and though I was very disappointed in having to put aside a goal I made for myself, I half-heartedly agreed. It was then things started to unravel between us and his mood just quickly declined. I should note that my boyfriend has diagnosed PTSD from childhood trauma and he has a tendency to become anxious and agitated when stressed out. The days that followed I had noticed a shift in him and because he works from home, I just assumed it was because his work was stressing him out.
I tried to be a good girlfriend by staying out of his way while he was working and try to be as quiet as possible while at home. I would try to help out with small things like letting the dogs out to relieve themselves and take them on short walks. I tried to be mindful to not make a mess. Along with my boyfriend's anxiety and mental health struggles he also has OCD, and while back in Seattle I had noticed he liked to keep a clean home, out in Iowa it had become abundantly clear that the smallest mess would upset him.
His bad mood only worsened. One day, while he was folding laundry, I asked him if there was anything he'd like me to do around the house because I wanted to be helpful. He said "If you see a mess, clean it." That came off as truly strange to me.
"Do you want me to vacuum or clean the bathrooms?" I asked.
He looked at me like what I had asked was the dumbest question he had ever heard and snapped at me with: "If you see a mess, clean it. You're not 12 years old, you're not being paid an allowance to do simple chores. You're an adult, you should already know what to do."
What he said embarrassed me and made me feel so small and inferior, but it also truly angered me. Where was all this hostility suddenly coming from? I didn't want to start a fight over chores and simply helped him fold the laundry. We eventually had a talk, which turned into him going on a tangent about how he requires to keep a clean and sterile house, that "everything has its place" in the house. He then went on about not wanting the commitment of home ownership and that he has no intentions of ever returning to Seattle. He told me how all my stuff cluttering the bedroom and office is taking a toll on his mental health and that it's my job to make sure that they're all put away so he doesn't have to see them (mind you, I was still unpacking and with limited storage space the rest of my belongings are still packed away).
Then he suggested something that blindsided me. He suggested that I possibly look for my own place so that we live separately and slowly integrate into each other's lives again. It was then that I took account of all the red flags that had sprung up from before I foolishly packed up my life to be with this man that I suddenly no longer loved. It was as if a switch in me had been flipped and all those feelings of affection just left my system. I told him that what he was proposing wasn't possible because I was struggling to find employment and didn't want to waste my savings on a brand new lease, especially since I was just added onto his lease.
I tried to find a middle ground with him, especially when it came to my personal belongings. I knew that he was talking about my makeup being out on the counter. Mind you, my second day in Iowa, we had gone to Costco where I found a makeup organizer and purchased it. All my makeup fits neatly in it and isn't scattered all over the place, he just doesn't like seeing them. That still wasn't good enough for him but I had to point it out to him by saying "I live here, too. It's only fair that I should feel like this is my home."
After that, the tension between us only got worse. He would have angry outbursts over the smallest inconveniences and prioritize more on his "mental and physical health" than work on our rapidly deteriorating relationship. I'm also at fault for not trying harder to talk things out but after he suggested I find my own place I subconsciously knew our relationship was over, on top of that, I was also emotionally drained and feeling depressed.
Now moving to the present, I had finally secured a job that would be opening a clinic nearby, meaning I wouldn't have to waste gas as much and would finally be able to contribute financially to the household. When I told my boyfriend the news it was received with a rather lackluster response but I still held out hope that once I start working and be out of the house more things might mellow out. Then, over the weekend, everything fell apart.
I had woken up early because the dogs needed to go outside. I knew my boyfriend wasn't getting much sleep lately so I let him sleep in as much as possible. Once the dogs had finished relieving themselves I had the intention of going back to bed to get another hour or so of sleep but the dogs came in to disrupt that plan. My boyfriend didn't like that and got up explosively, cursing and yelling as he stomped downstairs about how he couldn't get any sleep. I go downstairs to tell him that he can go back to bed, that I forgot to feed the dogs after letting them outside and that I would take care of it. He yells at me that he would do it since he's up and then goes on a rant about how his life was disrupted ever since I arrived. Let me remind you that he wanted me there in the first place.
He blamed me for the poor sleep he's been having ever since I arrived (there is also 3 dogs sleeping in the bed with us). He blamed me for his financial woes (he took care of the bills until I found a job). He blamed me for the hit to his credit score (I took a hit as well because we were getting pre-approval for a home loan before he said he didn't want to move forward with it). Blamed me for the decline in his mental and physical health (he vapes throughout the day and his vices are scotch and ice cream). And he blamed me for his inability to focus on drawing his comic series because of his mental health decline (he's a decent artist but I can't take credit for his creative block).
While he listed off all the things I am to be blamed for and how he had made so many compromises for me I reflected back on my surprisingly short time here (3 weeks, nearing 4), I was the one who made all the compromises. I was the one who made the bigger sacrifice. I traveled half-way across the country for a man who will never make my happiness a priority. From the start of our relationship 3 years ago to now, I was the only one who had to make sacrifices just to pacify this giant man-child.
He brought up me finding my own place again and I told him that if I have to move out then I'm returning to Seattle. He didn't fight me on that but the downside is that I have to wait for my parents, who had planned to drive out this way in June from Seattle, to visit friends in Chicago. They've been made aware of the situation and will be driving out in my step-dad's pickup truck to haul back all of my belongings and we would leave together in both my step-dad;s truck and my SUV. I had emailed the hiring manager I had gone through my interview process with, letting her know that I unfortunately will be returning to Seattle due to personal circumstances.
In the meantime I have begun submitting my resume to clinics and hospitals back in Seattle and already have several interviews set up (much faster turn-around than Iowa) and hopefully soon I will have secured a job before my return home.
2024.05.29 05:55 Gortski123 My dad told me to keep his planned divorce a secret. AITA?
Hello, bere with me this will be long...
Backstory with my family; I (25y M) , grew up as a military brat with one brother and mom and dad. My dad was always gone during the first 10 years of my life in Iraq and Afganistan. Year long deployments usually , and when he returned home it felt really awkward and we didn't talk... just kind of avoided each other. I never felt like he really liked me or my brother all that much. I made me unsure of how to act around older men for a long time... But from the perspective of a kid I thought him and my mom were like any other parents.
I didn't realize how him being in and out of my life effected me and my brother until we were older and out of the house. Constant moving to duty stations, starting over every 3 years, and an emotionally absent father can take a toll on a young boy. As a result I became very socially awkward and with guys and especially girls. To the point were I physically COULD NOT look people in the eye. Perhaps because whem my father would get mad he would stare at me in silence with a look that pierced my soul. It took years to hold eye contact with anyone (any body else have that problem?). My family is very awkward as well , my mom usually spoke for most of us in social settings , I guess my brother and I took after my dad's quiet demenour.
For me my childhood was best spent AWAY from home , usually crashing and my friends houses for days on end. If I was home , we all just kind of did our own thing in separate room... never ate together, at most watched TV sometimes. I spend most of my time locked away in my room once school got out or until I saw my friends again, same with my brother
Fast forward to turning 18, I enlisted in the army and got out of the house. Strangley enough my dad cried he day I left for basic , I guess I wasn't expecting much more than a goodbye hug. But that lead us to start talking more often than I ever had as a kid , which was kind of cool and also a little strange to get used to. After about 2-3 years of developing the relationship we never had , one day I get a phone call...
I thought it would be like our normal "how's life"? Or monthly chit chat we started doing. But OH NO... this wasn't that. He calls me and were talking like normal and he says "I'm glad we could bond over the past few years, I'm sorry I wasn't always there for you". I said "me too. And don't worry I've delta with it already". And he said "glad to hear , now can I trust you with a secret?". Didn't know what to expect... I said sure you can. "I'm going to divorce your mom in a few months , once you and your brother moved out it wasn't the same and I'm not happy".
Just silence... , what the he'll can a 20 year old guy who just recently formed a bond with his dad supposed to say??
To wrap the story up , no.. I didn't tell my mom. I was frozen with keeping his trust and our bond , but also not wanting to be the one to tell her. In the end , she found out I knew the two months before it happened and hasn't been the same since. She used to the mom who was the life of the party , but now she cries almost evryday since it happend (4 years now). She said she hated me for the first year . So that severed me and hers relationship and were just now starting to recover from it. I barely speak to my dad now , maybe 1 or twice every 3-5 months... that bond when down the funding gutter in the end lol..
On top of that , my dad moves back to his hometown where all his family lives. He told my brother he slept with like 12 women from dating apps (cool flex I guess) and is now engaged to a single mom with 2 teenagers. Apparently they go on vacations and hangout more than we ever did as a kid. Most days I really don't give a shit about any of it , but there's days (especially bad ones) were I consumes my thoughts and I feel like a piece of shit for never telling my mom and how his new family gets the dad I always wanted him to be. On top of if i had told her how things might have ended better. My dad also wants me to come visit and meet his new family eventually... fuck that... I'd be happy to never see them ever. So if you made it though all of that , AITA for telling my mom his plan?
submitted by Gortski123 to family [link] [comments]
Backstory with my family; I (25y M) , grew up as a military brat with one brother and mom and dad. My dad was always gone during the first 10 years of my life in Iraq and Afganistan. Year long deployments usually , and when he returned home it felt really awkward and we didn't talk... just kind of avoided each other. I never felt like he really liked me or my brother all that much. I made me unsure of how to act around older men for a long time... But from the perspective of a kid I thought him and my mom were like any other parents.
I didn't realize how him being in and out of my life effected me and my brother until we were older and out of the house. Constant moving to duty stations, starting over every 3 years, and an emotionally absent father can take a toll on a young boy. As a result I became very socially awkward and with guys and especially girls. To the point were I physically COULD NOT look people in the eye. Perhaps because whem my father would get mad he would stare at me in silence with a look that pierced my soul. It took years to hold eye contact with anyone (any body else have that problem?). My family is very awkward as well , my mom usually spoke for most of us in social settings , I guess my brother and I took after my dad's quiet demenour.
For me my childhood was best spent AWAY from home , usually crashing and my friends houses for days on end. If I was home , we all just kind of did our own thing in separate room... never ate together, at most watched TV sometimes. I spend most of my time locked away in my room once school got out or until I saw my friends again, same with my brother
Fast forward to turning 18, I enlisted in the army and got out of the house. Strangley enough my dad cried he day I left for basic , I guess I wasn't expecting much more than a goodbye hug. But that lead us to start talking more often than I ever had as a kid , which was kind of cool and also a little strange to get used to. After about 2-3 years of developing the relationship we never had , one day I get a phone call...
I thought it would be like our normal "how's life"? Or monthly chit chat we started doing. But OH NO... this wasn't that. He calls me and were talking like normal and he says "I'm glad we could bond over the past few years, I'm sorry I wasn't always there for you". I said "me too. And don't worry I've delta with it already". And he said "glad to hear , now can I trust you with a secret?". Didn't know what to expect... I said sure you can. "I'm going to divorce your mom in a few months , once you and your brother moved out it wasn't the same and I'm not happy".
Just silence... , what the he'll can a 20 year old guy who just recently formed a bond with his dad supposed to say??
To wrap the story up , no.. I didn't tell my mom. I was frozen with keeping his trust and our bond , but also not wanting to be the one to tell her. In the end , she found out I knew the two months before it happened and hasn't been the same since. She used to the mom who was the life of the party , but now she cries almost evryday since it happend (4 years now). She said she hated me for the first year . So that severed me and hers relationship and were just now starting to recover from it. I barely speak to my dad now , maybe 1 or twice every 3-5 months... that bond when down the funding gutter in the end lol..
On top of that , my dad moves back to his hometown where all his family lives. He told my brother he slept with like 12 women from dating apps (cool flex I guess) and is now engaged to a single mom with 2 teenagers. Apparently they go on vacations and hangout more than we ever did as a kid. Most days I really don't give a shit about any of it , but there's days (especially bad ones) were I consumes my thoughts and I feel like a piece of shit for never telling my mom and how his new family gets the dad I always wanted him to be. On top of if i had told her how things might have ended better. My dad also wants me to come visit and meet his new family eventually... fuck that... I'd be happy to never see them ever. So if you made it though all of that , AITA for telling my mom his plan?
2024.05.29 05:55 AnniChu333 How should I package these for shipping?
 | Hey all! I recently purchased a large lot of cels from a local flea market. While I’ve always dreamed of owning a cel, I don’t really have a use for 50+ of them so I will likely be selling most on eBay so other collector can enjoy them. submitted by AnniChu333 to AnimationCels [link] [comments] Most have the original sketches with them, a few have mismatched backgrounds, and they all came in a plastic dust cover, although a lot of the covers are damaged. These were supposedly pulled out of a dumpster back in the day so they are unfortunately in varying condition. I am planning on buying bulk document mailers (the kind made of thin cardboard) along with writing “do not bend” on the packaging. I’m wondering if I should include any kind of paper to sandwich the cel between (particularly the painted side) to prevent damage or the cel from sticking to the packaging. I saw someone mention that wax paper would work (the kind used in cooking) but I would be afraid as I know it doesn’t hold up well to heat. I know you should use acid free paper as well. Does anyone have some (budget friendly) suggestions for shipping these? I should mention they aren’t necessarily “high value” cels, but I still want to treat them with as much care as they need, without completely breaking the bank. Thank you all in advance :) if you’d like to see some of the cels I can post a few pics in another post. Most of them are from Caption Planet, but a few are from other more obscure and low budget cartoons and movies by DIC entertainment. |
2024.05.29 05:55 Outside-Reference850 AITB for posting a picture of my guy best friend?
Just trying to get as many opinions as possible bc the people in my life keep giving me mixed viewpoints.
One of my (18F) best friends (18M) is a guy we can call Kevin. Kevin was seriously one of my closest friends, someone who could give me brutal truth and honesty, great advice, reciprocate my sense of humour and talk about any topic to.
Kevin and I first met in grade 8 where he was the new kid at my old school and I was one of his first friends. Kevin and I lived in the same area, which is a trek to my old school, and was one of the only kids my age I knew in that area, so we became fast friends and close. Kevin, at one point in year 9 (ages ago), had a crush on me, but I rejected him bc I knew our friendship was better than that, and nothing of that nature has come up since.
In late year 10, Kevin got a girlfriend, Alanna (now 18F). I’ve moved schools and Kevin is one of the only people I’m still in contact with, and now my only friend who lives in my area, so we continue our friendship meeting up every month or so for a run, coffee and gossip about our old school. Alanna never comes up in convo except when I ask how she is, and he says good, what she’s been up to, end of discussion.
Flash forward to present day, Kevin broke up with Alanna 2 weeks ago bc of undisclosed reasons (I never asked). Kevin is permanently leaving for the Air Force soon so he came up to Canberra so we could meet one last time, so we met up with a few other old guy friends and hung out. A few days later I post a photo dump on insta of activities and photos of my family and friends from the past month, on the very last slide is one of Kevin from that Canberra meet-up. Kevin messages me a few days after the post, saying that it was “extremely upsetting” for Alanna, and to take it down. He continues to say that he should’ve never hung out with me at all during his relationship, bc he did it seeking “validation” and “attention”, which is a wild fucking thing to say, and a bit of a punch to the gut tbh, bc im not a yes man, all I ever did was treat him like I treated all my female friends and I viewed our friendship as a genuine thing and not whatever he apparently sees it as. Anyways, he says “I’m not sure if I can talk to you for quite a while, you’ve been an incredible friend to me, and I hope that everything works out really well for you” which kinda makes it seem like im being cut off for being the toxic one?? And now im just confused, are we no longer friends? And should I be ok with that considering all our friendship was to him was a source of validation and attention? But I am genuinely curious, AITA for posting that photo?
submitted by Outside-Reference850 to AmItheButtface [link] [comments]
One of my (18F) best friends (18M) is a guy we can call Kevin. Kevin was seriously one of my closest friends, someone who could give me brutal truth and honesty, great advice, reciprocate my sense of humour and talk about any topic to.
Kevin and I first met in grade 8 where he was the new kid at my old school and I was one of his first friends. Kevin and I lived in the same area, which is a trek to my old school, and was one of the only kids my age I knew in that area, so we became fast friends and close. Kevin, at one point in year 9 (ages ago), had a crush on me, but I rejected him bc I knew our friendship was better than that, and nothing of that nature has come up since.
In late year 10, Kevin got a girlfriend, Alanna (now 18F). I’ve moved schools and Kevin is one of the only people I’m still in contact with, and now my only friend who lives in my area, so we continue our friendship meeting up every month or so for a run, coffee and gossip about our old school. Alanna never comes up in convo except when I ask how she is, and he says good, what she’s been up to, end of discussion.
Flash forward to present day, Kevin broke up with Alanna 2 weeks ago bc of undisclosed reasons (I never asked). Kevin is permanently leaving for the Air Force soon so he came up to Canberra so we could meet one last time, so we met up with a few other old guy friends and hung out. A few days later I post a photo dump on insta of activities and photos of my family and friends from the past month, on the very last slide is one of Kevin from that Canberra meet-up. Kevin messages me a few days after the post, saying that it was “extremely upsetting” for Alanna, and to take it down. He continues to say that he should’ve never hung out with me at all during his relationship, bc he did it seeking “validation” and “attention”, which is a wild fucking thing to say, and a bit of a punch to the gut tbh, bc im not a yes man, all I ever did was treat him like I treated all my female friends and I viewed our friendship as a genuine thing and not whatever he apparently sees it as. Anyways, he says “I’m not sure if I can talk to you for quite a while, you’ve been an incredible friend to me, and I hope that everything works out really well for you” which kinda makes it seem like im being cut off for being the toxic one?? And now im just confused, are we no longer friends? And should I be ok with that considering all our friendship was to him was a source of validation and attention? But I am genuinely curious, AITA for posting that photo?
2024.05.29 05:55 Morascrochet defended my daughter who was yelled at by another mom
sorry long post
today i took my daughter (4) to her swim class. there is a another little girl there my daughter talks to, and they have fun in the class together. for context i sit by the pool and watch her. my daughter was sitting next to this little girl during the lesson when the girls mom came from the viewing room and yelled at my daughter "don't put your hands on my daughter again. put your hands on her again and see what happens.", and stormed back to the viewing area.
i immediately saw my child was uneased. for context i do not yell at my child. i am a preschool teacher and as someone who was yelled at as a child i do not see it beneficial. i asked the teacher what happened the teacher did not know, my daughter was too scared to speak and the girl said my daughter just bumped her body into her. i went out to the viewing room to ask the mom what happened and she yelled at me stating "your kid put her hands on my child. i need to defend her. this is not the first time. see what happens if she does it again." i told her my child bumped her shoulder, to which she told me "this is all the time. it's not my fault you can't disapline your child. she doesn't listen and she is the reason this class is a mess." she then told me to have a nice day. our daughters have been in this class together since march, and she has never come up to me to say anything. our daughters have even talked to each other in the line to enter the pool and she never said a word.
i went back to the pool to check on my daughter, who was so upset she didn't want to swim anymore. she was suppose to do a test to go to the next level but she was to upset to. i decided to just take her and go home.
before leaving i told the front desk the woman the woman scared and threaten my child that she did not swim today because of it. i wanted to know if she could make it up a different day, and be moved to the next class up. they told me they would do this for me, as well as talk to the woman and tell her her daughter can not swim there anymore. they said they thought it was best for us to leave in case the lady became more irritated when they talked to her.
im going to go back in the morning to confirm she is gone, because my daughter is scared of her. she is very confused and when i asked her about it later on she said "her friends mom didn't like something".
u just want to make sure i handle this situation well and was a good example for my daughter. she loves swimming and i would hate for her to be scared in a place she loves. now that she has moved up she will be in a class with my boyfriends daughter so at least she will still feel like she has a friend in the class.
thanks for reading
submitted by Morascrochet to Parenting [link] [comments]
today i took my daughter (4) to her swim class. there is a another little girl there my daughter talks to, and they have fun in the class together. for context i sit by the pool and watch her. my daughter was sitting next to this little girl during the lesson when the girls mom came from the viewing room and yelled at my daughter "don't put your hands on my daughter again. put your hands on her again and see what happens.", and stormed back to the viewing area.
i immediately saw my child was uneased. for context i do not yell at my child. i am a preschool teacher and as someone who was yelled at as a child i do not see it beneficial. i asked the teacher what happened the teacher did not know, my daughter was too scared to speak and the girl said my daughter just bumped her body into her. i went out to the viewing room to ask the mom what happened and she yelled at me stating "your kid put her hands on my child. i need to defend her. this is not the first time. see what happens if she does it again." i told her my child bumped her shoulder, to which she told me "this is all the time. it's not my fault you can't disapline your child. she doesn't listen and she is the reason this class is a mess." she then told me to have a nice day. our daughters have been in this class together since march, and she has never come up to me to say anything. our daughters have even talked to each other in the line to enter the pool and she never said a word.
i went back to the pool to check on my daughter, who was so upset she didn't want to swim anymore. she was suppose to do a test to go to the next level but she was to upset to. i decided to just take her and go home.
before leaving i told the front desk the woman the woman scared and threaten my child that she did not swim today because of it. i wanted to know if she could make it up a different day, and be moved to the next class up. they told me they would do this for me, as well as talk to the woman and tell her her daughter can not swim there anymore. they said they thought it was best for us to leave in case the lady became more irritated when they talked to her.
im going to go back in the morning to confirm she is gone, because my daughter is scared of her. she is very confused and when i asked her about it later on she said "her friends mom didn't like something".
u just want to make sure i handle this situation well and was a good example for my daughter. she loves swimming and i would hate for her to be scared in a place she loves. now that she has moved up she will be in a class with my boyfriends daughter so at least she will still feel like she has a friend in the class.
thanks for reading
2024.05.29 05:55 Cute_While3413 Want to share
Hi this is my first ever post or thread? di ako nagpopost dito sa reddit, lurker lang talaga ako. I wanted to share how my 4yr old crush ended. Kung andito ka man nagbabasa okay lang itatago nalang kita. PERO SANA WALA KA DITO
Disclaimer: Baka ayaw niyo ng napaka habang post or story, then step away. Also di po ako magaling sa grammar, babarilin ko mag-correct sakin.
So ito na nga mga Bhie,
It started when I was in college 2nd year, pandemic that time, we had online classes that time. Hindi kami close, so pano kami naging close? nung 1st year college magkaklase kami pero no interaction whatsoever. Then nung nagkapandemic nag enroll lahat online, kaming dalawa lang yung magkakilala. Siya yung unang nag chat sakin about sa assignment na ipapasa. Then we got to know each other sa mga chikahan saka kwentuhan(hindi ko na ilalahat kasi di ko na maalala.)
Then nagpapakita na siya ng hints, like nag sesend na siya ng pictures niya, nung una hindi ko masyado binibigyan ng pansin. Then nakikita ko din na nagshashare siya ng posts like mga pang banat or parinig na memes. Then that was the time na I started liking her back, because of the vibes, same kasi kami ng vibes. lagi na kaming late night naguusap, sabay nakikinig music sa discord server (typical teenage scenarios paginlove haha).
Late ko na na-realized na I'm giving too much attention, like too much. I was love bombing her, wala kasi ako experience pag-dating sa mga ganitong scenario. Dun ko din na-realize na ayaw pala talaga ng mga babae na masyadong clingy, di ko naman nilalahat girls ah.
Nagiging cold na siya sa mga chat niya, I forgot to mention na nag-lalaro din kami ng ML(Mobile Legends) that time, then I would invite her everytime na makikita ko siyang online but one time inivite ko siya, she declined the invitation. It started to confuse the shit out of me. Dumating pa sa point na iniistalk ko na yung mga kalaro niya.
Taposssss.... nahihirapan na ako mag-understand kung anong nangyari that time, so I mustered up my courage to confess, I wrote a letter dun ko ini-explain kung ano yung nararamdaman ko sa kanya, then I hit send. Syempre ito na yung mga long message, di ko na maalala yung lahat pero ang context ng whole conversation namin non, she lost the feels. then she would see me as a friend lang.
Thennnn, Semester break na non, with 2 months vacation I think, di ko na talaga maalala. 2 months without contact bago kami nag face to face ulit. Siya parin yung kaklase ko non. Akala ko naka move on nako pero hindi, bumalik lahat.
(I'll skip past to 4th yr) Requirement for our graduation is the internship, we had internship in this large company, I invited her to apply para sama sama na kaming mga friendship, na assigned kami sa 2 different schedule. I had the freedom to join her schedule, pero hindi ko ginawa. Maybe the worst or best decision that I've made. Minsan nalang kasi magkita during those intership, gawa nga nung different schedules so 2 araw lang lahat papasok ng interns sabi ni management. There was one guy na nakakasama niya lagi sa schedule niya. But even Before that nung sabay sabay lahat pumasok ng interns, sabay kami ni girl lumabas nung building pababa, pero one time, nung pauwi na hindi na siya sumabay sakin, kundi dun na sa guy.
I was silent the whole time, sa likod lang nila naglalakad pinagmamasdan sila. Then everytime na may picture taking kaming nsa management, humahanap ako ng paraan para mag tabi kami sa picture, pero yung guy lagi niyang hinahanap. Syempre gotta let out that forced smile.
so as I've said before, maybe the worst or best decision that I've made, worst kase nakahanap na siya ng iba. Best kasi di ko masyado silang nakikita. 4 months internship nun e, edi 4 months ka-ding patay sa selos.
Then graduation came, last day with her. I did enjoy every bits of it. I even gave her gift as my farewell gift. Time to apply for a job na, every time na makakahanap ako ng job, I would think of inviting her to apply as well. But di ko na ginawa, then no contact na kami for almost a few months now. ito lately nalang nagkaroon,
Here's present, nag-chat ulet kami lately, then the conversation eventually lead to infatuations, na delulu na naman ako, hoping for all these times. But I was wrong again. Sabi ko sa sarili ko di nako mag-confess ulit, pero di ko nagawa e, she likes someone else na pala.
Yun lang chika ko for today.
P/S: always shoot your shot peeps para di kayo matulad sakin na umasa ng ganong katagal. If you can't do it because you're scared, then DO IT SCARED.
submitted by Cute_While3413 to OffMyChestPH [link] [comments]
Disclaimer: Baka ayaw niyo ng napaka habang post or story, then step away. Also di po ako magaling sa grammar, babarilin ko mag-correct sakin.
So ito na nga mga Bhie,
It started when I was in college 2nd year, pandemic that time, we had online classes that time. Hindi kami close, so pano kami naging close? nung 1st year college magkaklase kami pero no interaction whatsoever. Then nung nagkapandemic nag enroll lahat online, kaming dalawa lang yung magkakilala. Siya yung unang nag chat sakin about sa assignment na ipapasa. Then we got to know each other sa mga chikahan saka kwentuhan(hindi ko na ilalahat kasi di ko na maalala.)
Then nagpapakita na siya ng hints, like nag sesend na siya ng pictures niya, nung una hindi ko masyado binibigyan ng pansin. Then nakikita ko din na nagshashare siya ng posts like mga pang banat or parinig na memes. Then that was the time na I started liking her back, because of the vibes, same kasi kami ng vibes. lagi na kaming late night naguusap, sabay nakikinig music sa discord server (typical teenage scenarios paginlove haha).
Late ko na na-realized na I'm giving too much attention, like too much. I was love bombing her, wala kasi ako experience pag-dating sa mga ganitong scenario. Dun ko din na-realize na ayaw pala talaga ng mga babae na masyadong clingy, di ko naman nilalahat girls ah.
Nagiging cold na siya sa mga chat niya, I forgot to mention na nag-lalaro din kami ng ML(Mobile Legends) that time, then I would invite her everytime na makikita ko siyang online but one time inivite ko siya, she declined the invitation. It started to confuse the shit out of me. Dumating pa sa point na iniistalk ko na yung mga kalaro niya.
Taposssss.... nahihirapan na ako mag-understand kung anong nangyari that time, so I mustered up my courage to confess, I wrote a letter dun ko ini-explain kung ano yung nararamdaman ko sa kanya, then I hit send. Syempre ito na yung mga long message, di ko na maalala yung lahat pero ang context ng whole conversation namin non, she lost the feels. then she would see me as a friend lang.
Thennnn, Semester break na non, with 2 months vacation I think, di ko na talaga maalala. 2 months without contact bago kami nag face to face ulit. Siya parin yung kaklase ko non. Akala ko naka move on nako pero hindi, bumalik lahat.
(I'll skip past to 4th yr) Requirement for our graduation is the internship, we had internship in this large company, I invited her to apply para sama sama na kaming mga friendship, na assigned kami sa 2 different schedule. I had the freedom to join her schedule, pero hindi ko ginawa. Maybe the worst or best decision that I've made. Minsan nalang kasi magkita during those intership, gawa nga nung different schedules so 2 araw lang lahat papasok ng interns sabi ni management. There was one guy na nakakasama niya lagi sa schedule niya. But even Before that nung sabay sabay lahat pumasok ng interns, sabay kami ni girl lumabas nung building pababa, pero one time, nung pauwi na hindi na siya sumabay sakin, kundi dun na sa guy.
I was silent the whole time, sa likod lang nila naglalakad pinagmamasdan sila. Then everytime na may picture taking kaming nsa management, humahanap ako ng paraan para mag tabi kami sa picture, pero yung guy lagi niyang hinahanap. Syempre gotta let out that forced smile.
so as I've said before, maybe the worst or best decision that I've made, worst kase nakahanap na siya ng iba. Best kasi di ko masyado silang nakikita. 4 months internship nun e, edi 4 months ka-ding patay sa selos.
Then graduation came, last day with her. I did enjoy every bits of it. I even gave her gift as my farewell gift. Time to apply for a job na, every time na makakahanap ako ng job, I would think of inviting her to apply as well. But di ko na ginawa, then no contact na kami for almost a few months now. ito lately nalang nagkaroon,
Here's present, nag-chat ulet kami lately, then the conversation eventually lead to infatuations, na delulu na naman ako, hoping for all these times. But I was wrong again. Sabi ko sa sarili ko di nako mag-confess ulit, pero di ko nagawa e, she likes someone else na pala.
Yun lang chika ko for today.
P/S: always shoot your shot peeps para di kayo matulad sakin na umasa ng ganong katagal. If you can't do it because you're scared, then DO IT SCARED.
2024.05.29 05:53 Ok-Visit3136 having panic attacks about friends mental state
hi, I (14f) have been friends with this person (14nb) for about two years now.
two years ago, they attempted suicide. thankfully, they’re still with us. recently they posted about how they ‘weren’t doing well’ and said they were feeling really down etc, etc.
I got really worried about this. I reached out and asked if they were okay and said that if they needed to talk to me, I was always here. and they promised that they would talk to someone if they felt they needed to.
their parents know about this. admittedly, their parents aren’t the best. but their siblings also know and they have a good support system with them. but I keep having panic attacks about it.
It’s gotten to the point where this is literally consuming me every single moment of the day. I am filled with anxiety. I constantly feel on the verge of throwing up. even if they take too long to answer a message, or haven’t been online for a certain amount of time I start panicking. everytime I receive a message from them I dread that it will be their suicide note. I’m so worried about them I cannot even describe it. they haven’t been online since yesterday and I’m literally spiralling about it. It’s unusual for them, and I keep telling myself they’re gone it’s all my fault for not doing more. im just so scared to lose them. I could never live with myself if I knew I could’ve done more. my father committed suicide and that was already hard enough. I cannot live with losing another person like that. admittedly, I have been a bit stand offish. these past five months have been incredibly traumatic for me and I’ve not been in the best mental state either. I just think that maybe if I tried a little harder to be their friend, or hang out with them more, they wouldn’t be in that mental state.
I’m just so worried. I feel like vomiting.
submitted by Ok-Visit3136 to AdviceForTeens [link] [comments]
two years ago, they attempted suicide. thankfully, they’re still with us. recently they posted about how they ‘weren’t doing well’ and said they were feeling really down etc, etc.
I got really worried about this. I reached out and asked if they were okay and said that if they needed to talk to me, I was always here. and they promised that they would talk to someone if they felt they needed to.
their parents know about this. admittedly, their parents aren’t the best. but their siblings also know and they have a good support system with them. but I keep having panic attacks about it.
It’s gotten to the point where this is literally consuming me every single moment of the day. I am filled with anxiety. I constantly feel on the verge of throwing up. even if they take too long to answer a message, or haven’t been online for a certain amount of time I start panicking. everytime I receive a message from them I dread that it will be their suicide note. I’m so worried about them I cannot even describe it. they haven’t been online since yesterday and I’m literally spiralling about it. It’s unusual for them, and I keep telling myself they’re gone it’s all my fault for not doing more. im just so scared to lose them. I could never live with myself if I knew I could’ve done more. my father committed suicide and that was already hard enough. I cannot live with losing another person like that. admittedly, I have been a bit stand offish. these past five months have been incredibly traumatic for me and I’ve not been in the best mental state either. I just think that maybe if I tried a little harder to be their friend, or hang out with them more, they wouldn’t be in that mental state.
I’m just so worried. I feel like vomiting.
2024.05.29 05:52 trekkiegamer359 How to Get Take Over a Website From an Ailing Person (with their permission) When the Domain is Lost?
My retired mom has gotten quite into a very niche science field, and is currently writing a book about it. The best website on the subject has gone down because the domain expired. She reached out to the sole woman who manages it, who is a passing acquaintance of my mom's, and has found that she's not doing well. She's in her 80s and seems to have significant memory loss. She didn't remember her own brother's name when they talked.
My mom offered to take over the website and keep it up in perpetuity. The lady was thrilled and almost started crying she was so happy. My question is what do we need to do to take over control of the website, and get it back up and running? I'm in the process of finding next of kin to have someone mentally competent to be able to talk to. This is also needed because we're in Iowa, and this lady is in New England.
I know that the website has been saved by the Wayback Machine almost 600 times, so we have access to most if not all of the content that way if the data is lost otherwise. I know the easiest thing would be to get access to the admin controls and pay it off before time runs out, but I don't know how long we have, or if it's already been too long. I'd ask for admin data from the lady, but if she doesn't know her brother's name, I doubt she remembers how to access her website controls. Hopefully a next of kin or closer friend can help.
We'll hire a web admin when we need to, but I'd like to have some basic idea of where to start with all this. I'll be going to a legal reddit sub for initial advice on the legal side. Any advice is greatly appreciated.
(Also, sorry if this is wrong flare. I wasn't sure what to put. Thanks.)
submitted by trekkiegamer359 to techsupport [link] [comments]
My mom offered to take over the website and keep it up in perpetuity. The lady was thrilled and almost started crying she was so happy. My question is what do we need to do to take over control of the website, and get it back up and running? I'm in the process of finding next of kin to have someone mentally competent to be able to talk to. This is also needed because we're in Iowa, and this lady is in New England.
I know that the website has been saved by the Wayback Machine almost 600 times, so we have access to most if not all of the content that way if the data is lost otherwise. I know the easiest thing would be to get access to the admin controls and pay it off before time runs out, but I don't know how long we have, or if it's already been too long. I'd ask for admin data from the lady, but if she doesn't know her brother's name, I doubt she remembers how to access her website controls. Hopefully a next of kin or closer friend can help.
We'll hire a web admin when we need to, but I'd like to have some basic idea of where to start with all this. I'll be going to a legal reddit sub for initial advice on the legal side. Any advice is greatly appreciated.
(Also, sorry if this is wrong flare. I wasn't sure what to put. Thanks.)
2024.05.29 05:52 Jlynneknight "I am doing the best I can"
I have to see my ex every week because our kids go to the same school (shoot me now). It is incredibly painful and I feel like I take 10 steps back every time I see him. Today, at an event, after round 10 of small talk even though he blocked me on everything, I cut the crap and said "why did you block me? how can you talk to me normally now knowing that?" he said "I am doing the best I can" I said "that is bullshit and you know it." and he said "I am doing my best." I just paused and then said.... "you cannot continue to try to talk to me in person like this and act like everything is normal." He then went on a rant on how I am not blocked on email (I am, but I also have not reached out). What is his best? How can someone justify ending a relationship while I was in another country in a text message as their best? Moving out of the apartment complex we lived in within a week? No closure. No talk about the kids and how to manage. No returning of things (except asking for the ring back in a text). This is his best? What world do I live in? This all ended with him claiming how I treated him was bad and toxic. I didn't even reply because I had no reply. I have spent the last 3 months replaying every situation in my head because I felt like a doormat. There was no amount of validation I could give him. My body was breaking down. I was so tired and stressed and forgetful. I would ask for space to heal and focus on me and he would last a day before melting down. But I was toxic? I am rambling but I just cant make sense of anything. I am tired of losing my mind. I just want to feel human again. How do you move on from the projection?
submitted by Jlynneknight to BPDlovedones [link] [comments]
2024.05.29 05:52 Exciting-Peace-9259 A neighbor did something kind for me.
So I am very introverted and never talk to my neighbors.. I interacted with one once like a year ago because my cat got out of my house and they knew where she was hiding. Oh my other neighbor took my cat in when she ran away. Other than those interactions I keep to myself and barely go outside. My parents live in town so they will mow my lawn once in a while - roughly once a week to every other week.
I also have a ring camera, but it literally ran out of battery last night..
I came home and noticed my lawn was mowed. I thanked my dad because I had assumed he had done it, but he said he didn’t. The lawn even looks nicer than when my dad does it. (His lawn mower leaves behind the cut grass and today there’s nothing left behind and actually looks healthy, not brown like it usually does).
I have 3 possible people who’ve done it.. there’s an old man who lives in the house behind me. He apparently told my dad a few weeks ago that he had lived in my house in the 70s and told him about his remodels that have lasted. My dad told him to “keep an eye on me”… The next is the house to my right. They are more creepy and have someone staying in a trailer in their backyard. My dad said that the guy who lives in the trailer has been doing a lot of yard work to their lawn. I don’t see their lawn a lot since the only window I have on that side is in my bedroom.. The third and probably most likely to have done it is the house with all the younger adults. They rent it and the landlord will mow the lawn (from what I can tell and through talking to my dad who somehow knows everyone). They have a new riding lawn mower this year and will mow every single week. They had mowed their lawn Saturday morning (since it comes up on my ring camera) and I left Saturday afternoon and caught that they had mowed part of my lawn to my driveway shortly after I had left, which is on my property and they’ve never gone that far before.
My lawn wasn’t terrible. My dad mowed the weekend before this past weekend, and with the little sun we got, it hasn’t grown much.
How do I navigate this? Do I say anything? It’s not like I usually see them either so do I go out of my way to thank them?
submitted by Exciting-Peace-9259 to introvert [link] [comments]
I also have a ring camera, but it literally ran out of battery last night..
I came home and noticed my lawn was mowed. I thanked my dad because I had assumed he had done it, but he said he didn’t. The lawn even looks nicer than when my dad does it. (His lawn mower leaves behind the cut grass and today there’s nothing left behind and actually looks healthy, not brown like it usually does).
I have 3 possible people who’ve done it.. there’s an old man who lives in the house behind me. He apparently told my dad a few weeks ago that he had lived in my house in the 70s and told him about his remodels that have lasted. My dad told him to “keep an eye on me”… The next is the house to my right. They are more creepy and have someone staying in a trailer in their backyard. My dad said that the guy who lives in the trailer has been doing a lot of yard work to their lawn. I don’t see their lawn a lot since the only window I have on that side is in my bedroom.. The third and probably most likely to have done it is the house with all the younger adults. They rent it and the landlord will mow the lawn (from what I can tell and through talking to my dad who somehow knows everyone). They have a new riding lawn mower this year and will mow every single week. They had mowed their lawn Saturday morning (since it comes up on my ring camera) and I left Saturday afternoon and caught that they had mowed part of my lawn to my driveway shortly after I had left, which is on my property and they’ve never gone that far before.
My lawn wasn’t terrible. My dad mowed the weekend before this past weekend, and with the little sun we got, it hasn’t grown much.
How do I navigate this? Do I say anything? It’s not like I usually see them either so do I go out of my way to thank them?
2024.05.29 05:52 Miserable_Vanilla629 Me 17M having facing trouble to Build Lasting Conversations with 17F
I'm a 17-year-old guy having trouble keeping conversations with women going. I'm good at starting a conversation and extending it with questions and small jokes, but it usually ends after about 5 minutes. I always feel like I'm annoying them or forcing myself into their space.
For example, I had a crush on a girl from the rugby team. I saw her walking with a broken leg and asked what happened. She said she fractured it while getting tackled. We talked for about 5 minutes, but then there was silence, and I said I had to leave. Later that day, I added her on Snapchat. She added me back, but left me on delivered for five days. Eventually, we snapped back and forth, building a seven-day streak, but then she stopped snapping me and left me on delivered for a couple of days, so I unfriended her. I still like her but thought it was best not to approach her again.
Whenever I see her in the halls, I don't know what to do. Do I approach her, or would that be creepy? Can I salvage this situation, or is it over? How can I build upon previous conversations and make interactions more natural and memorable? Keep in mind I told one of her friends that I liked her and she told me that she would help me out but now am scared that she already told her. Where do I go from now , how do I build apon the last Convo, we have lots of similarities like we like the same band. but she is a bit different she parties outside of school yet I don’t, she was seen on a dating app and I know that she is talking to 2 guys rn and most importantly how could I turn a small convo even if it was nice into a relationship.
submitted by Miserable_Vanilla629 to AskWomenOver30 [link] [comments]
For example, I had a crush on a girl from the rugby team. I saw her walking with a broken leg and asked what happened. She said she fractured it while getting tackled. We talked for about 5 minutes, but then there was silence, and I said I had to leave. Later that day, I added her on Snapchat. She added me back, but left me on delivered for five days. Eventually, we snapped back and forth, building a seven-day streak, but then she stopped snapping me and left me on delivered for a couple of days, so I unfriended her. I still like her but thought it was best not to approach her again.
Whenever I see her in the halls, I don't know what to do. Do I approach her, or would that be creepy? Can I salvage this situation, or is it over? How can I build upon previous conversations and make interactions more natural and memorable? Keep in mind I told one of her friends that I liked her and she told me that she would help me out but now am scared that she already told her. Where do I go from now , how do I build apon the last Convo, we have lots of similarities like we like the same band. but she is a bit different she parties outside of school yet I don’t, she was seen on a dating app and I know that she is talking to 2 guys rn and most importantly how could I turn a small convo even if it was nice into a relationship.
2024.05.29 05:52 ChiknaMoulvi It hurts.
After a wonderful year with an amazing girl who I fell in love with and was building a future with, I got suddenly dumped. Just a few days before the anniversary of the day we met.
About two months ago, after I returned from a trip, she came to meet me with the intention to break up because she felt the relationship had lost the ‘spark’. We had a healthy conversation and communicated the flaws and what was missing and decided that we would work on them together and revive it. Over the next month, we did exactly that, both proclaimed that we loved each other. We had our serious discussions and planned out the next couple months with weekend trips, and her introducing me to her mom who was supposed to visit this past weekend.
May 1st, her birthday, I surprised her, had a wonderful day on the weekend with her friends and everything seemed to be going great. She came by to spend the night next day and she would reiterate her feelings for me, through words and actions and everything seemed to be going great. May 8th, before going to sleep, I told her how much I missed her, and what exactly I missed about her to reiterate my feelings to show how serious I was as well. May 9th, morning, she replied normally and said she missed me as well and wished she could cuddle with me all day every day. I jokingly said I want to hear more, in detail as to how much she misses me. That message was followed by an entire day of silence. We were supposed to meet later that day however, she made up a reason to not meet and then called me later in the night and broke the news.
She felt she did not want to be in a relationship with me anymore. She had come to realize, that she would never love me the way I love her. We met a day later to say our goodbyes as I was in a state of shock. I was blindsided. I thought I only reciprocated the feelings. She mentioned that ‘I miss you’ message from me made her realize that she could never love me the same way. She said she will always hold love for me and care for me, and cherish the memories we made over the past year. I couldn’t muster up the courage to fight for us, how could I knowing that it was probably the last time I would be seeing her? I asked her what changed, what happened, what did I do and all she responded was ‘I don’t have an answer for you. I wish there was a reason, because you do and say everything that I want you to do and hear.’ Yet she left me. I didn’t beg, all I could say was, if that’s what you feel, how can I change your feelings?
I sent a letter proclaiming my feelings to her and why I said what I said and how ‘she’ had planned all those trips and plans over the next couple weekends and the summer. The day it got delivered, I sent her a message that I wasn’t expecting a response, even though I so much wanted to, and that I will be blocking/removing her from my instagram as that’s the only social media app I use.
She didn’t reply, it broke me apart, but maybe that was for the best? So, it’s been 17 days of no contact, and I miss her every day, all day. I truly loved her and this has broken me into a million pieces. She was the first girl I was going to confess my love for, to my conservative and religious mother. It felt like someone snatched the earth from beneath me. I wake up in the middle of the night multiple times trembling or sweating dreaming about her. I have lost 8 pounds due to a loss in appetite. I have been meditating, journaling, working out, playing soccer, staying busy as all of you have said but it still feels like a gaping hole in my heart. I get anxious and shortness of breath. I cry till I can’t cry anymore. Each day is a battle with myself so I don’t reach out to her.
How do you go from best friends one day and to being a stranger the next? She made me a better man than I was yesterday and now it feels like everything I had hoped for is shattered. I know time heals all wounds, but how do I go forward knowing she will not be a part of my life the way I had and atleast till the last day, she had envisioned as well? It hurts.
I miss her so much and I know I will always love her. But I’m doing my best to stay no contact so I can hopefully heal. Why is the world so cruel?
submitted by ChiknaMoulvi to ExNoContact [link] [comments]
About two months ago, after I returned from a trip, she came to meet me with the intention to break up because she felt the relationship had lost the ‘spark’. We had a healthy conversation and communicated the flaws and what was missing and decided that we would work on them together and revive it. Over the next month, we did exactly that, both proclaimed that we loved each other. We had our serious discussions and planned out the next couple months with weekend trips, and her introducing me to her mom who was supposed to visit this past weekend.
May 1st, her birthday, I surprised her, had a wonderful day on the weekend with her friends and everything seemed to be going great. She came by to spend the night next day and she would reiterate her feelings for me, through words and actions and everything seemed to be going great. May 8th, before going to sleep, I told her how much I missed her, and what exactly I missed about her to reiterate my feelings to show how serious I was as well. May 9th, morning, she replied normally and said she missed me as well and wished she could cuddle with me all day every day. I jokingly said I want to hear more, in detail as to how much she misses me. That message was followed by an entire day of silence. We were supposed to meet later that day however, she made up a reason to not meet and then called me later in the night and broke the news.
She felt she did not want to be in a relationship with me anymore. She had come to realize, that she would never love me the way I love her. We met a day later to say our goodbyes as I was in a state of shock. I was blindsided. I thought I only reciprocated the feelings. She mentioned that ‘I miss you’ message from me made her realize that she could never love me the same way. She said she will always hold love for me and care for me, and cherish the memories we made over the past year. I couldn’t muster up the courage to fight for us, how could I knowing that it was probably the last time I would be seeing her? I asked her what changed, what happened, what did I do and all she responded was ‘I don’t have an answer for you. I wish there was a reason, because you do and say everything that I want you to do and hear.’ Yet she left me. I didn’t beg, all I could say was, if that’s what you feel, how can I change your feelings?
I sent a letter proclaiming my feelings to her and why I said what I said and how ‘she’ had planned all those trips and plans over the next couple weekends and the summer. The day it got delivered, I sent her a message that I wasn’t expecting a response, even though I so much wanted to, and that I will be blocking/removing her from my instagram as that’s the only social media app I use.
She didn’t reply, it broke me apart, but maybe that was for the best? So, it’s been 17 days of no contact, and I miss her every day, all day. I truly loved her and this has broken me into a million pieces. She was the first girl I was going to confess my love for, to my conservative and religious mother. It felt like someone snatched the earth from beneath me. I wake up in the middle of the night multiple times trembling or sweating dreaming about her. I have lost 8 pounds due to a loss in appetite. I have been meditating, journaling, working out, playing soccer, staying busy as all of you have said but it still feels like a gaping hole in my heart. I get anxious and shortness of breath. I cry till I can’t cry anymore. Each day is a battle with myself so I don’t reach out to her.
How do you go from best friends one day and to being a stranger the next? She made me a better man than I was yesterday and now it feels like everything I had hoped for is shattered. I know time heals all wounds, but how do I go forward knowing she will not be a part of my life the way I had and atleast till the last day, she had envisioned as well? It hurts.
I miss her so much and I know I will always love her. But I’m doing my best to stay no contact so I can hopefully heal. Why is the world so cruel?
2024.05.29 05:52 Golden_fsh Squall is more interesting in Kingdom Hearts than he is in his own game
I've thought this for a long while (more like 20 years, lol), but as the title says, I found Squall from FF8 to be way more interesting in the Kingdom Hearts series than he is in his own game.
I preface this with saying that my first introduction to Squall was as "Leon" in Kingdom Hearts. I liked how he initially helps Sora on his journey and serves as a friend/mentor figure of sorts in the games. He seemed strong and cool to me, and his interactions with the other FF characters were great! Can never forget Leon and Cloud fighting back to back against the heartless!
After beating KH1, I looked forward to learning more about Leon in FFVIII. Imagine my disappointment when finding out that he's nothing like how he was in KH. The other FF characters pretty much have the same personality in KH that they do in their own final fantasy game but Leon in FFVIII was boring and uninteresting af, lol. I really tried to find depth with his character through his dialogue with others and his own inner thoughts but sadly, nothing ever came through.
I've seen the discussions on this subreddit about Squall and have made multiple attempts to replay FFVIII to see if I can warm up to him but he still comes off as boring to me. I have nothing against stoic characters when they're well-written but unfortunately that is not Squall.
I'd be curious to know why Nomura and the others changed Squall so much in KH that he comes off as a completely different character. If Leon is supposed to be an older Squall after the events of FF8, then maybe I can see how he could have changed . He also seems to have more relevance in KH than FFVIII? Felt like to me that Squall never had much impact within FF8? Hard to explain it clearly, but it felt like Squall was the type to have things happen to/around him with no reaction rather than be someone who makes events happen or have impact on ongoing events?
The "twist" of FF8 was a lame attempt at character development for Squall, imo. By end game, I think we were supposed to see a more expressive Squall who actually has initiative as part of his overall character development but we barely got to see any of that, imo.
Tl; Dr: Squall is more interesting in KH because he actually has a personality. Some people say the reason why he's a nothing burger in FFVIII is because of trauma but I don't buy it. Nothing in FFVIII's writing indicated to me that he would've been a more interesting character otherwise. I'm also not expecting him to have been some forward, outgoing person but what we did get was disappointing to say the least. IMO, Squall is the most uninteresting protagonist in FF overall 🤷🏾♀️
submitted by Golden_fsh to FinalFantasy [link] [comments]
I preface this with saying that my first introduction to Squall was as "Leon" in Kingdom Hearts. I liked how he initially helps Sora on his journey and serves as a friend/mentor figure of sorts in the games. He seemed strong and cool to me, and his interactions with the other FF characters were great! Can never forget Leon and Cloud fighting back to back against the heartless!
After beating KH1, I looked forward to learning more about Leon in FFVIII. Imagine my disappointment when finding out that he's nothing like how he was in KH. The other FF characters pretty much have the same personality in KH that they do in their own final fantasy game but Leon in FFVIII was boring and uninteresting af, lol. I really tried to find depth with his character through his dialogue with others and his own inner thoughts but sadly, nothing ever came through.
I've seen the discussions on this subreddit about Squall and have made multiple attempts to replay FFVIII to see if I can warm up to him but he still comes off as boring to me. I have nothing against stoic characters when they're well-written but unfortunately that is not Squall.
I'd be curious to know why Nomura and the others changed Squall so much in KH that he comes off as a completely different character. If Leon is supposed to be an older Squall after the events of FF8, then maybe I can see how he could have changed . He also seems to have more relevance in KH than FFVIII? Felt like to me that Squall never had much impact within FF8? Hard to explain it clearly, but it felt like Squall was the type to have things happen to/around him with no reaction rather than be someone who makes events happen or have impact on ongoing events?
The "twist" of FF8 was a lame attempt at character development for Squall, imo. By end game, I think we were supposed to see a more expressive Squall who actually has initiative as part of his overall character development but we barely got to see any of that, imo.
Tl; Dr: Squall is more interesting in KH because he actually has a personality. Some people say the reason why he's a nothing burger in FFVIII is because of trauma but I don't buy it. Nothing in FFVIII's writing indicated to me that he would've been a more interesting character otherwise. I'm also not expecting him to have been some forward, outgoing person but what we did get was disappointing to say the least. IMO, Squall is the most uninteresting protagonist in FF overall 🤷🏾♀️
2024.05.29 05:51 Miserable_Vanilla629 Me 17M having facing trouble to Build Lasting Conversations with 17F
I'm a 17-year-old guy having trouble keeping conversations with women going. I'm good at starting a conversation and extending it with questions and small jokes, but it usually ends after about 5 minutes. I always feel like I'm annoying them or forcing myself into their space.
For example, I had a crush on a girl from the rugby team. I saw her walking with a broken leg and asked what happened. She said she fractured it while getting tackled. We talked for about 5 minutes, but then there was silence, and I said I had to leave. Later that day, I added her on Snapchat. She added me back, but left me on delivered for five days. Eventually, we snapped back and forth, building a seven-day streak, but then she stopped snapping me and left me on delivered for a couple of days, so I unfriended her. I still like her but thought it was best not to approach her again.
Whenever I see her in the halls, I don't know what to do. Do I approach her, or would that be creepy? Can I salvage this situation, or is it over? How can I build upon previous conversations and make interactions more natural and memorable? Keep in mind I told one of her friends that I liked her and she told me that she would help me out but now am scared that she already told her. Where do I go from now , how do I build apon the last Convo, we have lots of similarities like we like the same band. but she is a bit different she parties outside of school yet I don’t, she was seen on a dating app and I know that she is talking to 2 guys rn and most importantly how could I turn a small convo even if it was nice into a relationship.
submitted by Miserable_Vanilla629 to AskTeenGirls [link] [comments]
For example, I had a crush on a girl from the rugby team. I saw her walking with a broken leg and asked what happened. She said she fractured it while getting tackled. We talked for about 5 minutes, but then there was silence, and I said I had to leave. Later that day, I added her on Snapchat. She added me back, but left me on delivered for five days. Eventually, we snapped back and forth, building a seven-day streak, but then she stopped snapping me and left me on delivered for a couple of days, so I unfriended her. I still like her but thought it was best not to approach her again.
Whenever I see her in the halls, I don't know what to do. Do I approach her, or would that be creepy? Can I salvage this situation, or is it over? How can I build upon previous conversations and make interactions more natural and memorable? Keep in mind I told one of her friends that I liked her and she told me that she would help me out but now am scared that she already told her. Where do I go from now , how do I build apon the last Convo, we have lots of similarities like we like the same band. but she is a bit different she parties outside of school yet I don’t, she was seen on a dating app and I know that she is talking to 2 guys rn and most importantly how could I turn a small convo even if it was nice into a relationship.
2024.05.29 05:51 ElectroMenZ I just beat my first full Kaizo ROM hack (SM74 Ten Years After v3.74) + my review
 | Ok, so on May 26th 2024, I got all the stars after 31 hours + 3 more I had on another save file, and let me tell you what, it was quite a rollercoaster of an adventure, so here I'll just review my overall experience of it submitted by ElectroMenZ to sm64hacks [link] [comments] C1 Dice Domain: (9/10) It was a nice beginning course that felt welcoming for people who are just getting started on easier Kaizo hacks, like sure, it feels a bit different from the original source material, and that can be great, as it gives a player something kinda new, so overall, it's a solid level without it being intimidating, and it's just a nice little warmup for me, someone who's trying Kaizos for the first time C2 Concrete Jungle: (8.5/10) This is also a pretty solid course, and although, the red coin star was replaced in this version, it was still a solid experience without them, and the stars still felt like a nice little warmup. Also, there was that one heave-ho trick I had to know about, so yeah, I didn't know at the time, and instead went the long way on top to slide and jumped to the star, which involved me finding a bug where I get soft locked on the slope, but again, still quite a solid level with interesting design choices C3 Wallowing Wells: (8/10) This is a great mashup of C3 from SM74 and EE, and even though I'm not the biggest fan of water levels, you actually have faster swimming, and it's way better than what I tried in EE, I mean, I had a good time getting the stars and the 100 coins even, then you have the waterless mode star which is a good test of your platforming skills, and even though a fell down a few times, it's actually not near as bad as what you had to do in EE, and it was quite enjoyable, so still a nice mashup that doesn't feel like a difficulty spike out of nowhere, but still slightly trickier than the first two courses Underground Slide: (7.5/10) Now, here's the first little difficulty spike in the hack, so this one had me dying a bit on the slide's reds, and yeah I died at the end to that stupid pillar. Also, to get that first star in the metal cap switch, I decided to take the long route instead of doing the skip, I dunno why, but anyway, near the end of that section kinda felt like a chokepoint, but I mean, it's not bad, and I liked how they replaced the Mario Party minigame music with the underground theme from Yoshi's Island, which is quite fitting with the redesign, so overall, even if it's a bit of a difficulty spike early in the game, I still did like my experience with it quite a bit, and I like the new aesthetic of it B1 Bowser's Park Party: (9/10) I actually like what they did with this version, they made it feel a bit different by making it like an island in the sky, and the stars were just pretty fun overall, like the one metal cap star was an interesting because of the way you go inside the building to get it, and the key section felt free because of the metal cap safety net, but there was that one part where you had to do oddly precise lava bounces, I don't know why LinCrash made it that way, but I'm not gonna question it, and it was an enjoyable experience all the way through C4 Bogey Bayou: (8/10) I thought this course was pretty fun, but there was that one pit with Bubbas with the red coins that were a bit risky to get due to the relentless nature of them, however, the rest of this course had some solid stars in it, like there was one star where you have the entrance to a secret lava section, and due to the Parallel Lakitu cam, you didn't have to do blind guesswork, so that's nice, but yeah, the actual secret entrance star was just free, nothing else to say about that one, but even though the 100 coins took me longer than it should've, I actually had quite a fun time platforming on rooftops over some deadly quicksand sludge C5 Flamework Factory: (8.5/10) An interesting course with tunnels that leads you to other stars and parts of the level, and honestly, I liked how it felt sort of like nice little puzzle with a couple of stars requiring certain caps to traverse to the other section, and in the current version, the tunnels just warp you to that certain room, I don't really mind the change that much because it doesn't really decrease the difficulty that much, so overall, another solid experience when I knew the places I needed to go for certain stars. MC Aerial Alpine: (9/10) I love what they did with the metal cap stage from the original EE, they turned it into a snow level, and now it's a lot more enjoyable, and even though this current version replaced the red coin star, it was still a nice chill stage, no pun intended, and the stars felt like nice little warmup sections that I had a pretty good time with, even though they replaced the metal cap section with a shell riding one, so that actually felt a bit more fun to do, since I'm actually good with the shell VC Dusty Darkness: (6.5/10) Now, this is the first level that started giving me a bit of problems, like there's this one star where I had to jump down to a walljumping section, and I actually had to turn up the brightness on my monitor to see where I was, and even then, I kept on getting caught on the one wall because the collision is weird, and I missed my jump quite a bit because of it, but once I learned to stop touching the wall, it wasn't as bad, and there was one more star that gave me slight problems, but that one at least didn't have bad collision, and the other stars were actually quite decent, so yeah, definitely not a great level at all, but not that bad WC Lava Pit of Inversion: (7.5/10) Yeah, it's just a chill wing cap course that doesn't feel special at all, it was just like the original, except flipped upside down, I mean, the stars were satisfying to get, however, could've done something more creative with it, but I mean, it still is quite a decent experience C6 Stalactite Cave: (8/10) This is yet another water stage, and again, I'm not the biggest fan of them, but this one actually was kinda interesting, even though this course got the Drowned Factory treatment. This course seemed quite solid with this one platforming section above water that is slightly tricky, but quite fun to do, and I liked that one part where you had to get a Chuckya from the cage below and clip behind a wall to get that one star, so yeah, nice rendition of course 6 that had completely different stars, and it was not bad to navigate at all C7 Crumble Rumble Tower: (8/10) I really do like the aesthetic of this course, and I enjoyed the climb to the top with the 5 secrets, it's actually kinda fun doing those ledgegrabs near the top, even when there were those clouds that blew you off the course, and the 100 coins were fun to get, except there was that one sketchy red coin you had to get a walljump off of, but it was still a bit of fun nonetheless, and the King Whomp bossfight is actually not bad, even though it was sand, but you actually had more of a platform to work with, so yeah, overall, solid course with only a couple parts that made me go "meh" C8 Absolute Zeroasis: (6.5/10) Yeah, this is a course I didn't enjoy as much due to that red coins maze with freezing water, and the camera not being the greatest, along with that one spiral pyramid star that was quite a bit annoying to get, but if you set aside that, the 100 coins and other stars are actually decent, so overall, it's not that bad, but yeah, wasn't really a fan of a couple stars C9 Nature Nocturne: (8/10) This is actually a solid rendition of Course 9, I liked the music in it, it was a nice vibe from Yoshi's Story, and I liked the red coins in it, there was some enjoyable platforming on top of wood planks, and it's interesting going under the flower field to get this one secret, even though you had to go back to get the star, but I really like the idea of it, and yeah, the star under the bridge I could've gotten by using the switch, but I did it the hard way, which took me dozens of tries, but overall, what a solid remake B2 Bowser's Tidal Tropics: (6.5/10) So yeah, this is the first level that actually made me rage a bit, but before I get into that, I will say that I love the Koopa Troopa Beach music in this course, it really compliments the theme of it, and 4 of the stars in there were just kind of a nice experience, but that one star where you had to do the firsties at the right angle, even though, thankfully it's not quicksand this time, it's water, it still proved to be quite a bit annoying, but it was satisfying once I pulled it off, and now, the key part was what really started getting to me because at the beginning, I felt like I had to do the one firstie so that I can have just the right height land on the platform without getting grabbed by the Chuckya, and that gets annoying because every time a failed on those angled timed boxes, I have to start front the beginning, but I realized, I did that part the hard way, so my experience with this could've went a lot smoother, if it weren't for that, but still, not the greatest experience due to it deriving from the EE version of this stage, however, the stars before the key section were overall not bad, and again, that key section made me quite a bit angry, but the rest of it was actually not bad, it was just a matter of getting past those couple things I mentioned earlier C10 Quicksand Beach: (9/10) After the last stage, this one was actually quite chill, the stars were actually quite enjoyable to get, like the red coins were fun to shell jump up to get in the middle of the quicksand, and thank God LinCrash decided to have 100 coins nerfed because in the older versions of SM74, you had to get all the blue coins like near frame perfect, and you had to slowly push all the bullies into that one tiny lava pit, but this version, really made it chill, and at first, I thought the stars you had to get by going into the quicksand tunnel we're gonna be a pain, but actually, the Parallel Lakitu cam worked out in my favor, and I actually enjoyed going down there, so this yet is another nice and solid experience C11 Polluted Pond: (7/10) So, it's the level with one of the stars I dreaded, the star where you have to do walljump crossovers over a platform with quicksand, but I really surprised myself here, as it only took me a few tries, and I actually never died to the quicksand itself, I just failed at the last crossover a few times, so this might've been just a fluke, but yeah, while the rest of the level wasn't the greatest due to having to climb back up out of the toxic sand below, and it took me so long to find the last red coin for some reason, although, it still has quite a bit of fun platforming here and there, but on that one hideout star where you kinda have tight window for those timed boxes, it was mildly annoying when I hit that arrow leading me to it, however, after that is not that bad, just one sketchy jump, so overall, not really a great course, but the platforming was a bit of fun to do C12 Cliff of Time: (8/10) Now this is an interesting one because this is like the first time that we see two versions of a course that you get to switch between depending on the star, and I mean, I enjoyed getting these stars, they were quite a bit unique from each other, and yeah, the red coins weren't really as bad as I thought, it was just that one sketchy walljump ledgegrab I had to do to get to the rest of the course, and every time you started the harder version of this course, you had to do a firstie to even start it, which is not that annoying at all, and just meh, but the same went for some of the red coins, however, you did have quite a bit of room for error before the timer ran out, so this course overall has cool concepts, and it felt quite fair C13 Sea Salt Peaks: (5/10) Now, most of this course felt a bit free, and Koopa the Quick is still slow, this was just a fine level, but oh my God, the Hot Arch Crossing star really brings down the experience because it was so annoying with those firespitters while having to do more precise walljump crossovers three times in a row, and one where you have to do kind of a precise triple jump to get to the last crossover, like that star genuinely made me just rage, and I never wanna touch it again, although the 100 coins were quite a bit scarce C14 Veninium Sphere: (8.5/10) Now this course was quite fun, and I actually like how LinCrash designed the course to have more gaps in it to make up for the nerfs he did, so it still didn't feel too easy for what it was, and the climb was quite satisfying, but the one small flaw I had was with the first star Tower of the South, and that is when I just got through the hall of angled walljumps, I would sometimes miss the star because I couldn't exactly tell where it is in that hole in the ceiling, but I mean, I feel like that one was just on me, although, the rest of the level was very good, and the red coins didn't feel daunting at all to get, so overall, it was quite an enjoyable experience C15 Delombru Sphere: (8.5/10) Same as the last course, the climb was quite satisfying to do, but this course felt a bit more convoluted to me because there was that one sideways tower that I didn't know I could reach with a triple jump until I tried it, and there was that one Dungeon Dominance star where I didn't think that precise walljump ledgegrab was intended, yet it was, but it wasn't actually that bad, and thank God that one crazy Tower of the North star was changed into an amp obstacle course because in the old versions, you had to do really precise walljumps consistently without ledgegrabbing, and the 100 coins and 8 reds were actually pretty satisfying to get on only like what, my 4th attempt? I mean, you got those two sketchy red coins at the beginning, but after that, it was nice and smooth sailing because I just crushed it, I genuinely thought I was gonna fumble more on that, but glad I didn't, however, the Morbid Deadly Puzzle star was still pretty tough because it's like closer to EE difficulty than any other star here, and I will not forgive that one Snifit that killed me one time when I was getting far into that star, but it was quite satisfying once I finally got the star at the end, so overall, a well designed course with a challenge that will prove to be pretty difficult, but comes with a satisfying reward at the end Void of the East: (8/10) Now this was quite a tough and challenging star, and that one angled walljump off the pillar and tower right next to it is kinda what made the challenge even moreso, but good thing you can come up with a good routing method for this star to not feel like as much of a drag, so for me, the metal cap lava bounce secret was the easiest, so I did that last, and yeah, to get off that one rooftop, it sucked when I just couldn't make the jump with the wrong angle, but as I did the right angle, it wasn't as bad, and the rest of the course is actually fun, so once it got consistent, it was quite enjoyable, and I was thoroughly satisfied after getting that star B3 Bowser's Rainbow Realm: (6/10) Yeah, I didn't enjoy opening the cannon in this stage that much at all, I just hated having to do those angled wall kicks over the first lava section at every attempt I had at opening the cannon, but good thing that you didn't have to do three of those in a row, just one of them, and the amp section was just a bit annoying because I had to be careful with my jumps, while having to deal with the possibility of the firespitter getting me, as for the second lava section that first jump was quite sketchy to make, but right after that, the section was definitely better than the first one. There was also that Heave-ho on the third section that killed me at least a couple times, and it felt like a slap to the face when that happened to me, but when I opened the cannon, I felt quite a bit relieved, and the other stars were actually a bit enjoyable, despite me wanting to get to Grandmaster's Goal that final day, like the secrets had some decent platforming, but it was just a slight flaw that I couldn't properly see that one opening to getting that 5 secrets star, however, I got the right angle at some point, and now the 8 red coins were actually quite decent, it felt like a good break, but there were a couple red coins that seemed slightly sketchy, but we're not bad at all, however, I will say, wasn't really the biggest fan of getting on those steep slopes, as they felt fast, and I had to make sure my angle to get on them was good or else I'd fall down due to no ledgegrabs, but it was alright, and yeah, I accidentally got that one caged Banjo Tooie cartridge star while getting the red coins, but after that, there was one more kind of annoying star I had to get with that risky platforming on the walls of the amp section, and the final fight was just Bowser, but the bombs were oddly closer than the original, don't know why LinCrash made them like that, but whatever, it's fine, so overall, yeah, this stage can get quite frustrating when you are trying to open the cannon, but after that, it's not bad at all, it actually got quite a bit fun, although, the music felt a bit repetitive NGL Grandmaster's Goal: (8/10) This was a pretty good gauntlet at the end, but oh my God it's quite nerve-wracking I got closer to the end, and when I died a couple times at those cones in the Cliff of Wrath part, it was a bit disappointing, but as I noticed that I was getting more consistent with the other parts, the confidence built within me, and in this current version, they added a heart at the walljump crossover section, and oh man, I really needed it, even though it nerfs the endurance test a bit, I still appreciated it, and yeah, the metal cap section was still a chokepoint because of that one walljump ledgegrab, and at the beginning of me doing this gauntlet, I kept dying at the Stalagmite Cave slide part, even though I shouldn't have because it's easy when I got the angle right, but yeah, overall, this gauntlet was pretty well put together, but yeah, there are a couple parts that are easily chokeable and can be roadblocks to your success. Oh and one thing I forgot, the other two Grandmaster's Goal stars, they were a bit easy to get, like you could just do a skip to save time for the "speedrun" star, and there was that one hidden star that was fairly easy to find, so those two stars were essentially before the real deal, and they were kinda cool to get In conclusion, my first Kaizo experience definitely had times where I got quite a bit frustrated, but in the end, I'm glad I beat this as my hardest ROM hack, and the experience was definitely worthwhile, so I decided to post this review here to share my experience |
2024.05.29 05:51 Any-Feedback5797 Advice on how to make friends for weirdos?
Hi reddit, thank you for taking the time to read my post! I'm (25m) and I'm just now reaching a point in my life where I feel like I can handle more socializing. My problem is that I've had to deal with some pretty serious abuse and neglect as a child and as a result I have almost no reference for a health relationship and how to build one. Im great at avoiding red flags in people, but I'm just so inexperienced with good connections that as soon as I start to see green flags in someone I just start acting completely unhinged. It's like I get this compulsive urge to be as friendly and kind as possible but it always just comes off in the worst way possible. Even when I try to relax and be more casual I still somehow manage to make an ass out of myself every time. At this point I don't know what to do, and I'm sick and tired of being lonely. I just want to be able to have friends again, and any advice would be greatly appreciated.
submitted by Any-Feedback5797 to LifeAdvice [link] [comments]
2024.05.29 05:50 CamaroMusicMan How to get over loneliness.
I am just feeling it hard right now. It is summer weather is great but I just ain't feeling it. I gained most of all the weight I lost a couple years ago but have lost about 10lbs since then but I haven't done any gym work since I came back home from college. The remaining friend group I had after high school pretty much fell apart. I have enough stuff to keep me energized and focused but I find myself endlessly looking at reddit and youtube or just listening to music. I have summer class to work on, I wished I would play instruments more/practice, and I frankly haven't done any hobbies outside my comfort zone.
It makes me unhappy and lonely to not even be able to pick up at least my guitar. It has been two weeks since spring semester and I just worry this will be the whole summer. I fucked up my sleep schedule already since I don't want to come to the next day. I am frustrated that at 21 I have not had a real relationship. Which in part is because of my weight even though I had lost 75lbs by the time I started college but like I said gained all of it back and only lost a little bit more. I have harsh family who accuse me of not helping my parents but I do but they are older than dirt and expect me to read my parents mind on what to do, when all they gotta do is tell me and i'll do it. I can't read minds.
I feel intelligent but at the same time incredibly stupid. I don't have that wet blanket feeling like I used to but more of that hole in the hurt and punch in the gut. I wish I could just wake up and do my homework first thing, do cardio and free body exercise, and do other hobbies like instruments. But I just do the bare minimum for myself, I feel so alone most of the day. I feel better when I am helping out the rents or grand rents but that only distracts me for so long.
I know I can't fix the longing for a relationship thing overnight since I wouldn't even have the faintest clue on how to even tackle that even if I was back to my "low" weight. I don't think I am depressed or anything but I just get lonely and wish I had someone or something to do shit with. I don't even hate myself anymore even with the weight gain, I got all that out of me a long while ago, sadly that therapist retired and I don't want to go to some other one. The guy was the only decent therapist out of the handful I had before him. Having one now would probably not make much of a difference, most of the advice and suggestions I already probably know but just don't implement them to help myself.
Like I said the remaining friend group pretty much disintegrated so I have nobody close to do stuff with. Even then a couple of them are busy with relationships or their own problems.
I don't even find that much joy from driving my camaro. It's like what's the point driving the same roads over and over, especially all by yourself it gets old.
I just want to be able to enjoy the weather and sun stress free, worry free, and lonely free.
If you read this, thanks, I think I just needed to vent out how I am feeling on paper. If anyone has any words of wisdom thanks.
submitted by CamaroMusicMan to Advice [link] [comments]
It makes me unhappy and lonely to not even be able to pick up at least my guitar. It has been two weeks since spring semester and I just worry this will be the whole summer. I fucked up my sleep schedule already since I don't want to come to the next day. I am frustrated that at 21 I have not had a real relationship. Which in part is because of my weight even though I had lost 75lbs by the time I started college but like I said gained all of it back and only lost a little bit more. I have harsh family who accuse me of not helping my parents but I do but they are older than dirt and expect me to read my parents mind on what to do, when all they gotta do is tell me and i'll do it. I can't read minds.
I feel intelligent but at the same time incredibly stupid. I don't have that wet blanket feeling like I used to but more of that hole in the hurt and punch in the gut. I wish I could just wake up and do my homework first thing, do cardio and free body exercise, and do other hobbies like instruments. But I just do the bare minimum for myself, I feel so alone most of the day. I feel better when I am helping out the rents or grand rents but that only distracts me for so long.
I know I can't fix the longing for a relationship thing overnight since I wouldn't even have the faintest clue on how to even tackle that even if I was back to my "low" weight. I don't think I am depressed or anything but I just get lonely and wish I had someone or something to do shit with. I don't even hate myself anymore even with the weight gain, I got all that out of me a long while ago, sadly that therapist retired and I don't want to go to some other one. The guy was the only decent therapist out of the handful I had before him. Having one now would probably not make much of a difference, most of the advice and suggestions I already probably know but just don't implement them to help myself.
Like I said the remaining friend group pretty much disintegrated so I have nobody close to do stuff with. Even then a couple of them are busy with relationships or their own problems.
I don't even find that much joy from driving my camaro. It's like what's the point driving the same roads over and over, especially all by yourself it gets old.
I just want to be able to enjoy the weather and sun stress free, worry free, and lonely free.
If you read this, thanks, I think I just needed to vent out how I am feeling on paper. If anyone has any words of wisdom thanks.