When the missionary asks me if I want to here a message, I don't care what his theology is or how faithful he is, that missionary is asking me to subscribe to a very specific worldview carried down and reinvented by hundreds of men who all changed it to be convenient for them. Sorry, I don't see slave morality as beneficial for anyone. The roman empire used Christianity for their convenience to unify the cultures of the pagans they conquered, the puritans were so divisive they were kicked out of England. The religious 2nd great awakening in 1800's America was the equivalent of Doterra companies being started all over the American Frontier, and the private organization we have today is a real-estate company.
This specificity led to a worlview that removes people from a fluid, adaptable worldview and empathy into a constant stream of latter-day anxiety and doomsdayism. It also puts the locust of control into almost everyone and everything else besides you. That missionary is asking me to support an organization that tried to genocide the indigenous Utahn tribes, overthrow the government, and steal a bunch of land and money from families for generations. It's not a spiritual message.
Christians in general underestimate how much civilization was informed by wise men outside of a religious paradigm. Civics and Ethics are hardly revered in religious Christianity, but have a secular tradition. Mormons, on their own, without help from outside cultures, art, societies, would succumb to their own harshness. There is still a colonization factor inside it that leads to them claiming "good" things from secular sources as their own.
That missionary is asking me to take what is not mine. I'm not going to repeat the cycle of anxiety, delusion, or colonization.

I think it’s so funny. The whole comment section of crusty TikTok is saying she’s glowing and that she’s matured and then there’s always that one person that is so funny and has to bring out what she’s doing wrong and then that whole comment section under that one comment says” can nobody give her a compliment without your miserable attitude”, but I think it’s funny because that same person is in Rachel‘s comments tearing her down, and is tearing down everybody else in that comment section that doesn’t agree with what crusty does and all the people that give Rachel a compliment they tear them down, anybody else noticed that crispies and big back no ass fans are just so toxic and so hypocritical And crispy if you’re listening or reading this get a life and stop hurting your unborn baby because some people would gladly take that baby out of your care. If you don’t want it and for big back no ass your music nobody wants to hear it It literally sounds like a Disney Channel movie gone wrong also, Jacob put a pin in your girlfriend‘s ass because she’s starting to look obsessed with Rachel. We all know she loves kissing girls so maybe she’s in love with Rachel but let’s be real It’s getting weird also get a damn job and support your kids for once pay something for G health insurance or when he goes to school pay for that it’s not that hard to pay for something that you created and for the new baby Well clearly you didn’t even want him so my advice for that would be put a condom on it Let’s not have the next baby mama for another year Give it a break and break up with crispy panties because we all know it’s coming and settle down find a cool job and start paying for your babies and not relying on girls to pay your way. And for Tyler man the hell up and break up with her man she’s cheating on you like grow up and leave Find someone that actually wants you because she doesn’t and everybody sees it except your blind ass self and if Rachel reading this get G before crispy panties and Jacob have that new baby because clearly crispy can’t respect your boundaries as a mother and constantly tearing you down and also sending her friends and minions after you, you have enough proof to get G out of a toxic and homophobic, racist crappy household also can we just mention that there is literally nothing healthy in crispies house for your household Ellie has fruit and vegetables and then balancing off with a couple treats here and there crispies is just junk food.

I (26F) and my boyfriend (24M) have been doing LDR for about a year and a half now from different countries. I currently live by myself in a quiet quant US beach town that iv had the pleasure of living in for 10 years. To say I LOVE it here, is an understatement. He lives with his parents/family in the EU. After a year he decided it was time for us to make moves to live together because neither of us can stand the distance if it were up to us.
My job allows me to work from wherever I want so it makes more sense for me to move to his country which is absolutely no problem for me. Im actually really excited about it. When I fly and I land in his country/city I feel the same love and excitement I do when I land where I live.
In Europe things move so slow(paperwork wise IYKYK) and we put in with this apartment company 6 months ago in the beginning of December. The plan was to move out of my apartment, move in with my parents for a few months until we hear from the apartment company. I never loved this idea as I havent lived home in 10 years. My parents/family are wonderful and we are tight knit but I never thought at my age Id move back in with them. I dont want to, but was willing to thinking we would have an update relatively soon.
My lease where I live ends in July, but they need to know if I am renewing by May 30th(10 days from today). Im really torn on what to do because of course the only thing I want right now is to close the distance between him and I, but it feels silly of me to get rid of my apartment when theres nothing to move into yet. Not only is there nothing to move in to but no update or ANYTHING about if we are approved or where we are in the process after SIX MONTHS!
Today I brought up the idea to him that maybe they will let me sign a 6 month lease so that will buy us time. He got mad and can barely even have a real conversation with me. Iv been telling him for MONTHS that I would really appreciate if he can make calls/appointments to try going to the office on his day off to see if he can speak with someone who can give us the slightest clue as to where we are at in this process. So now after I mentioned the 6 month lease thing he’s going on about how he made so much of an “effort” to try to figure this out and make appointments with the company to see whats going on. I believe he really has tried but never was able to actually get in with them or whatever. And I tell him that I appreciate him trying but to protect my happiness, i think 6 more months wouldn’t be a bad idea. He cant understand why I would do this, and I cant understand why this is a problem?
I understand its a lot of pressure on him to make this work but because I am moving to HIS country, where I do not speak the language, he does have to step up and be the one to work things out with the company. I told him so many times how appreciated it is and if I can do ANYTHING to take any load off of him to let me know. Its just- to me it seems like he’s not doing ENOUGH and he has no sense of urgency for this situation as Im about to lose my apartment because he cant go down there on his day off to figure things out. This is my life we are talking about and he doesn’t seem to even care. Does it not click that I am literally moving across the pond for him?
AITA for wanting to sign my lease for 6 more months just to see where things go? AITA for thinking he just isn’t doing enough to make this work?

chapters 1&2
chapter 3
chapter 4
chapter 5
chapter 6
chapter 7
chapter 8
chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
The lecture was supposed to be on Rationality 101, apparently not for Newcomers only. Serene was there to have her back but G was having a hard time focusing.
The boring black uniform more fitting for a hotel receptionist defaced the godlike beauty standing in front of a huge screen. Gentry couldn’t believe her eyes: this was the man she had her hands on a little while ago?
No, it couldn’t be.
It had been just an avatar, too perfect in its unblemished visage, too pure for this world. Yet the man whose face she remembered as if it was etched on the back of her eyelids, who she’d been constantly thinking about, who her hands itched to snatch, was standing right there, in the flesh.
Back in the dreamy simulated world she caught herself thinking that a trim waist like this couldn’t anatomically work on a human, yet here he was: a towering spread of fit shoulders perfectly balanced above the flexible whip of his midsection. The light-grey eyes that betrayed every movement of his pupils were as real as the ones that reflected the mock moon during her test. Below them lay the sharp slope of the cheekbones one could cut themselves on.
The only thing a bit different, apart from the outfit choice, was the young god’s hair. In the simulation, it was flowing and probably too long to be practical. This person’s mane was much shorter and fell down his neck in a neat ponytail, tastefully tamed with a single hairpin.
She had to get her hands on this treasure.
He was making last minute preparations for the lecture, looking through the papers on the desk, dark strands framing his face, light grey eyes sharp in careful concentration.
Professor Q, huh.
He said this was his name, and so did the note on the lecture hall door.
She was sure it was the man who had melted in her arms making the most delicious sounds a male throat could produce.
Had he recognised her?
Unlikely.
At the time of the simulation session, she didn’t have a camera that could pick up her facial features but just to be on the safe side, she decided to go by “G” in his class. There were bound to be lots of people with a name starting with a G, right? What would be the odds it was this particular newcomer that Q had tested that would end up in his class?
The man finally lifted his eyes at the audience and a gentle smile momentarily graced his features before disappearing as if he didn’t see someone he’d expected to.
The holoboard on the wall behind him obediently lit up following his nonchalant gesture. Gentry found it annoying that one needed a pair of special glasses to see all the augmented reality stuff and really navigate the city but again, with Sereen’s help she had more or less gotten used to it in the couple of days she had to deal with the necessities like settling down, getting food and finding her way around Ashtapada.
Still, could they use a piece of chalk or, at least, a marker to write on the board? No need to show off your Fully Automated Luxury Space Communism tech just to write a couple of notes on the board!
On second thought, high-tech-crazy or not, if this city brought up men like this one, she would definitely do her best to stay here to… reap the benefits!
They took a desk next to a huge clear floor-to-ceiling window that overlooked the winter garden.
“Professor Q seems a little distracted today,” Sereen said, swiftly tapping a couple of buttons on G’s wrist to show her how to confirm that she was attending the lecture. “He’s usually much more chatty and friendly. I wonder what got into him.”
“Is he?” Gentry responded with an artificial air of indifference. “I just hope he’s more open to a discussion than that Poe guy.”
“He is! And Professor Poe isn’t that bad,” Sereen reprimanded before chuckling a little — since his little secret became known to students, he became known as Holopoe. “Just wait and see, it’s gonna be a blast. Q’s lectures are always very engaging.”
It proved to be utter bullshit.
After fiddling with the symbols on the interactive screen for ten minutes into the class, students getting more and more agitated behind his back, the lecturer seemed to give up. Turning back to the audience, he absentmindedly nodded to a couple of people in the lecture hall and sighed with a painfully fake smile.
“For today’s class, we are going to need to read a certain extract from a book,” he said, tone apologetic for some reason, but it solidified G’s conviction that she already knew this person. “I’ve just sent it to each of your wristcomms. We’ll have some quiet time and read it by ourselves, alright?”
“Reading from the comm?” Sereen mumbled to herself. “Couldn’t he just print them out?”
The rest of the students’ grumbles showed that they shared her disappointment. Q could only hopelessly smile again before returning to his work on the board.
Reading from the little semi-transparent screens was indeed torture. Quickly giving up on trying to awkwardly use gestures for scrolling through the text, she looked out of the window to entertain herself with the garden outside. From the modest height they were sitting at, the people below were quite discernible, partly hidden by the greenery, spread here and there in small groups and pairs. Gentry longed to be there, too. What was the use of being here with the most attractive person in the whole world if the only thing she could see was his back?
Well, the back didn’t look half bad, if she was honest, and what was below also pleased the eye.
But still. It would soon bore even the most easily entertained.
Her gaze fell to a small clearing where a lone male figure was sitting, writing something in a notebook. By the looks of it, the notebook was a real paper-made thing without the bells and whistles usual for Ashtapada. The next thing G noticed was a pair of slender legs, barefoot, stretched to dip the toes into the clear water of the artificial stream.
God bless the urban designers of this place!
The figure lifted the head and in an inconceivably graceful motion, swung the long blond bangs away from the face.
G straightened her back. Was it... Ok, maybe Q was the most handsome man she’d seen in her life but this... This was the younger boy she’d noticed a couple of days back, the one in a plaid skirt, shamelessly flirting with everyone within reach. Today, he wasn’t wearing one but the blue jeans hugging his thighs, rolled up almost to the knees, presented a picture just as tantalizing. Even with the hair was a completely different colour, even though the half-up, half-down style kept his face hidden, she was absolutely certain it was the same person.
Just you wait, young beauty, as soon as this “lecture” was over, your princess in shining armour was coming to pick you up!
Suddenly snapping out of the dull weariness, she turned on the auglasses S helped her obtain earlier and tapped away on her comm screen.
What a chance to give the local text sharing feature a go!
“The garden is pretty, but with a blossom like you, it is truly breathtaking. I wonder if anyone has picked this sweet flower or if anyone dares to,” she typed a cheesy note and folded the message into a neat 3D figurine of an origami paper crane with her fingers in the air.
Was S watching? Screw it, even if she was, she couldn’t read the message with her glasses off, right?
Carefully aiming the device at the lone figure, she launched the crane downwards, and it fluttered like a weightless butterfly in spirals, through the glass and right into the young man’s lap, not disturbing the notebook pages. He started at first at the intrusion but then turned his own glasses on and unfolded the message. A shy smile appeared on his plump lips, and he looked flattered, turning his head around to see if the sender was in sight. Catching no one, he typed something below the initial message and deftly folded it back into a crane that, to G’s surprise, flew directly at her, in uneven spirals along the wall. The man traced it with a smile, propping himself back on his arms, his whole slim body and face on full display now.
God, was he good-looking.
Easily passing the physical border of the glass again, the crane crashed into Gentry’s wristcomm, dutifully delivering the message and betraying her tactical position at the same time. An amused kind of surprise showed on the young man’s face and he waved at her to show that she had been exposed. She waved back, trying to look nonchalant but probably failing miserably.
Very smooth, G, way to go.
The message read, “Is a flower only good for looking at? Not this one.”
Oooh, this boy was playing with fire!
“Hey, G,” Sereen nudged. “Have you finished reading?”
“Mm? Oh, yeah.” Gentry lied easily. She had skimmed the first couple of paragraphs and was sure she’d be able to come up with something if asked.
“Done everybody?” the deep gentle voice called from the holoboard and G’s attention snapped back to the dignified face.
The class murmured affirmatively.
“I’m sorry today’s lecture isn’t as fun as usual,” he admitted. “I must say I’m still unsure how to approach such complex topic as this one. But with your help, I hope we’ll figure it out.”
Everyone seemed to perk up.
“You just read an extract on paradoxes,” Q went on. “And you might be wondering why we are raising a philosophical topic on a rational thinking course.”
“There you go,” Sereen whispered. “He’s back to normal!”
G humphed. This did seem interesting. Was it a good idea to read the extract after all?
Q continued, “In the text, you might have encountered the definition of a paradox. Would anyone explain it with their own words?”
A raised hand and the lecturer’s nod brought some courageous soul to their feet.
“It’s when you start with the correct premises, use consistent logic but wind up with an impossible conclusion,” they said. “There are three types: falsidical, veridical and antimony-type, which are...”
“Correct,” Q smiled and nodded the person back down. It was a smile worth starting a thousand wars over.
“Now there’s a reason why I asked you to read about them. Why do you think people have been fascinated with paradoxes for such a long time?”
S raised her hand and received a kind invitation.
“I might be wrong,” she said. “But it seems that they point at the limitations of our thinking, things that seem rational but in fact aren’t. We feel that with our all-conquering logic we can solve any puzzle but it’s not always the case. Right?”
“This is very insightful,” the teacher confirmed. “It is believed by many that what’s rational is true and therefore what rationality cannot explain must be false.”
“I definitely know someone who would die on that hill,” Gentry grumbled under her breath.
“I’m sorry?” Q asked. “Is there something you wanted to add... sorry, I don’t know your name?”
Still half mad with professor Poe, Gentry stood up. “It’s G, I’m a Newcomer. I was saying how a human mind can fool itself into thinking it knows what it looks at as long as it makes sense. But in reality, it’s not there, like the sky.”
That was the only thing she remembered from that last lecture! She felt the tips of her ears heat up but the kind and considering look on Q’s face showed her gamble paid off.
“These are very insightful observations, G, why don’t we try exploring them together?” — he waived her to sit down and turned back to the class — “Five minutes to discuss how paradoxes might reveal the weaknesses of rational thinking. Send your answers to the board when you’re done.”
“Whoa, daring as usual,” Sereen smiled. “I knew you’d enjoy his class.”
“Now, consider these two questions,” Q said to another student who stood up at his hand wave. “If an unstoppable force meets an indestructible object, what is going to happen?”
The person seemed to contemplate it for a while and the teacher didn’t rush him.
“Isn’t it one of those which are impossible to solve because the existence of the one automatically disproves the existence of the other?”
Q nodded, “Correct. The second one about the barber in a small town is of the same sort. Sereen?”
S stood up too, “The one that shaves all and only men that don’t shave themselves?”
“Yes,” he confirmed. “At first, a premise like this seems perfectly reasonable, doesn’t it?”
“It does,” S responded, somewhat rashly. “But it’s clear that a barber like this cannot exist.”
“Wait, really?” Gentry whispered as Q nodded in satisfaction and urged her friend to go on.
“Yes, if we ask ourselves if this barber shaves himself. If he doesn’t, then he is part of the group which he does shave that do not shave themselves, but if he is in this group, then he does shave himself which makes it impossible for him to be this barber by definition.”
While the rest of the class was catching up with the logic, Q’s smile got only wider, more inviting.
“What does it tell us about the nature of the premise then?” he asked.
“That although it seems that it sounds logical on the surface, it is in fact nonsense and we don’t even need to hear the rest of the riddle to discard it completely,” S concluded.
The man chuckled.
“Well, I wouldn’t be that brash, to be honest, but on balance, you’re right,” he said. “If you stay after the lecture, I might recommend a couple of books on the topic. Your Newcomer friend is welcome to stay, too.”
G put up the best of the aloof fronts, “I’d be happy to, Professor.”
“Q is fine,” he smiled again and went on addressing the rest of the class that immediately exploded into a heated discussion.
***
“Basically, what I think we’re supposed to learn from this,” S concluded after a while, standing up so that everyone could hear her. “Is that before applying rationality, we have to make sure that all the premises we are dealing with are in fact realistic. Otherwise, there is no way rational thinking will help us.”
“Excellently put, as always,” Q applauded. “I’d love to see if everyone agrees or has something else to add to the discussion but our time is up. Feel free to write me a letter with your reflections on the topic.”
As interesting as the class was, the urge to leave the premises as soon as the teacher dismissed everyone seemed to be universal and applicable even to the Ashtapadans.
“I have to go now,” Sereen said. “Text you later, ok?” And with a reciprocal nod to Q, disappeared in the doors, joining the rest of the students.
Sadly, she couldn’t recall what they were talking about after the lecture, nor what titles Professor recommended for some home reading. She just hoped she didn’t make a fool of herself.
What Gentry did remember though was that after Q left as well and she came up to the panoramic window, Sereen and the mysterious flower boy were leaving the garden together. And it was hard not to notice that her new friend took off her wristcomm before they took off, and hid it in the tall grass.

This is, perhaps, the first little nugget of something I've been laughing in my head about a long time. It's a series about Malcador power-bottoming his way around the castle while keeping his identity secret (or, trying to) during the siege.
The first book, I think, should be called "The Sigillite's Tricks"
Feel free to respond with funny scenarios or writing of your own
Excerpt:
“The Lord Regent will see you now,” said a tall, gracefully aging female attendant, and it pulled Sargent Reginald Dallius out of his reveries.
So much going on in preparation of the Arch-Traitor's attack on the Sol system and Throneworld. So much to be done. Such a bad time to lose focus.
Dallius considered any time a bad one for an Imperial Fist to lose focus, it was not in their nature, yet the incident in his private quarters during the night played on his mind over and over.
The attendant led him through an archway, and then pressed her hand to a gene-coded pad to open the doors. They slid open without noise, despite being carved of rock, inlayed with pearl, and being four times the space marine's height.
She stopped at the threshold, standing sideways, and swung her arm in a gesture as to present him to the room beyond. The space was richly yet tastefully appointed with everything the Sargent had come to expect from a meeting space in the regent's wing of the palace. Devotional frescoes captured famous moments from the battles for Unity on Terra; and his eye was drawn to one figure on the wall, kneeling down, at hip height to a figure that radiated light. He quickly looked away.
“Please, come and sit, Sargent,” said a voice off to his right, and he found himself obeying before he knew it.
“You will forgive me if I do not rise, such late nights these days,” said the Sigillite in a tone that didnt seem to match his sentence. Dallius considered it almost...joyful?
“Of course, my lord” He responded as he sat and looked over to the Lord Regent. Malcador the Sigillite, despite looking like a tired old man with a large archeotech collar on his neck, seemed to radiate strength and energy in abundance today.
“I have called you here to discuss the ongoing fortifications in sector 2-DA16,” The Sigillite said without looking up. Dallius had to wrack his edeic memory for information that should have already came to him.
“The old mech-stables just west of the tourney grounds,” The regent reminded him, looking up with a raised eyebrow. “It seems I'm not the only one with a lot on my mind.”
“Yes, my lord, my apologies,” Dallius had to bite back the instinct to offer an excuse, that his mind was wondering in circles today. It was not the way of the Imperial Fists to make excuses.
“Here,” said Malcador as he reached for a decanter and filled two glasses “Let us have a drink to help unwind slightly” Pushing the half-filled glass towards Dallius, The Sigillite swirled the dark drink while inhaling, before taking a small swig.
“Some say its as good as the real thing from the vineyards of Franc; I wouldnt go that far,” said the Sigilitte as Dallius sipped from the glass. Then, taking another drink and rolling it around his mouth, the Sigillite spoke with his mouth still mostly full of wine
“Delicious”.
At that, Dallius nearly choked on the small amount of liquid he swallowed. That word, and the way he said it brought him back again to the memory of the previous night. That was exactly what the robed figure said, exactly how he said it, after Dallius had spent himself. His left leg began to shake, just as it had the night before. All at once, Dallius was drawn back into the memory that was fresh in his mind. The strange robed figure, the command and steel in his voice as he bid Dallius stand still, the way his brown roughspun hood obscured his face, and the way that Dallius melted at his touch.
“Is something amiss, Sargent?” Malcador asked, bringing him back to the present.
“No, Lord, my apologies” Just then, The Sigillite's vox-bead rang, and after a clipped answer he turned to Dallius to dismiss him. Dallius gladly took the dismissal, promising to come back in a few hours to finish the meeting. He walked quickly from the chambers, sweating inside his armor.

This is a rundown of the predominant intelligent races on my fantasy version of Saturn, which is a sword-and-sorcery world loosely based on Classical mythology. Your feedback is greatly appreciated!
Aranians are the oldest of Saturn’s intelligent races. Like their kin the Arthropoids, they are entomons, with multi-jointed legs and semi-flexible exoskeletons. Unlike the Arthropoids, they are only slightly humanoid. Their lower bodies are spider-like, with eight legs and large abdomens, while their upper bodies are more humanoid, although they have six arms and numerous eyes. Once long ago, they boasted a planet-spanning civilization; they were the first to develop philosophy and art, mathematics and astrology, architecture and literature. But in the apocalypse of the Day of Wrath, their civilization was annihilated, and today, the descendants of those ancient Aranians have largely forgotten about the glories of their once-proud people. Many Aranians, such as the Slavars, live nomadic existences, although a few settled Aranian nations, such as Anansazi and Ctenizan, still exist.
{Classical Mythology equivalent: Centaurs}
Arthropoids are entomons, insect-like creatures with semi-flexible exoskeletons, but are far more humanoid than their Aranian cousins. Most are of human height, with two legs and four arms, but a few are smaller, such as the ant-like Marwari, who stand roughly four feet tall, or the flea-like Zaoi, who are usually less than three feet in height. Most Arthropoids have wings, which allow them to fly thanks to their irridescent membranes, membranes which manipulate colour and permit flight despite the Arthropoids’ weight. Unlike the Dendryads, the Arthropoids are not a single species, but rather a collection of many species that are not capable of interbreeding. A wide variety of nations have been founded by the Arthropoids—the expansive empire of Marwar, the reclusive land of Aed, the militaristic Vazhka—and in a few places, mainly Naranj and Merinj, they live in harmony with the Dendryads. In the main, however, a state of war usually exists between the Dendryads and the Arthropoids, as the two “superraces” compete for control of Saturn.
{Classical Mythology equivalent: Myrmidons, Amazons}
Although Dendryads appear to be plants, they are not. They are instead phyta, a kingdom of organisms that split off from plants roughly 400 million years ago. Humanoid, like almost all creatures native to Saturn the Dendryads have six limbs, four arms and two legs. Unlike the Arthropoids, the Dendryads are a single species, although with astonishing diversity; their subraces are capable of interbreeding, but this usually requires divine intervention. Most races of Dendryads are sequential hermaphrodites: they change from male to female or female to male periodically throughout their lives. Over the millennia, the Dendryads have spread out across the surface of Saturn, forming mighty kingdoms and vast empires. Today, most Dendryads would assert that, even if their own nation is not particularly powerful, the greatest and most puissant of Saturn’s civilizations are still Dendryad. The most notable of these is Aquarium, the Golden City, the Light of the World, the last remnant of the Anthemite Empire and defender of civilization since Anthem’s fall ten thousand years ago. Other Dendryad kingdoms of note are Naranj and Merinj, Dzjanggakh, Mora, and Qoq. With the fall of Anthem, though, the Dendryad position is threatened by rising powers, most of which are either Arthropoid or Mykobold in ethnicity. On multiple fronts, the Aquarine Empire is challenged: by its ancient enemy Marwar, by the new and dynamic Swarm of the Azzuzzazi, by invading Slavars. Only time will tell if Aquarium can withstand this onslaught of “barbarians”.
{Classical Mythology equivalent: Dryads}
Mykobolds are the fungal equivalent of Dendryads. Shorter than the Dendryads, they prefer dark and moist regions of Saturn, such as deep caves, swamps, and the undergrowth of many of Saturn’s forests. This often brings them into contact with the te’Ythul (see below), often at the Mykobolds’ cost. Their relations with the other races of Saturn vary significantly depending on the tribe of Mykobolds and the counterparty: the Russulkas or Redcaps are mischievous bordering on murderous, the Troggoths of the subterranean empire of Troggoroth are insane cultists, the Kuba are peaceful shamans, the Lichens are undead necromancers who possess the rotting bodies of other races, the Gomphlins are friendly but isolationist, the Thallids have an ancient but proud scholarly tradition, and so forth. Recently, many tribes of Mykobolds have begun migrating from their traditional strongholds into the vacuum left by the decaying eastern half of the Anthemite Empire, creating new petty kingdoms for themselves and occasionally finding themselves as the ruling class over Dendryads. This has led to tension between the two ethnicities.
{Classical Mythology equivalent: Troglodytae}
The Coral Brains are not, strictly speaking, a race in the same way as the others. They are, instead, vast colonies of polyps that function as enormous neural networks. Once a single supercomputer that covered much of the surface of Saturn, the coral was shattered during the Day of Wrath and many fragments were ejected into Saturn’s atmosphere and beyond. Now the remaining pieces, which range in size from a few dozen meters across to dozens of miles, roam the skies of Saturn, kept aloft by careful channeling of colour which provides an antigravity force. It also fuels their computation. Some of them have seen their surfaces colonized by other races, but those settlers exist on the coral brains only at the brains’ sufferance. For at least a million years, the coral brains have been locked in a secret war with the Shimmering Demons, recruiting from the other races individuals and sometimes entire nations as pawns in their struggle to control Saturn; most notably, both sides have engaged the services of what remains of Anthem’s ceramic legions as foot soldiers.
{Classical Mythology equivalent: Genii Loci}
The te’Ythul, or Spawn of Ythul, are one of the most ancient and mysterious of Saturn’s races. These hulking giants, who can reach heights of thirty feet, are found only in humid and swampy areas, where the water in the air keeps their mucous-covered skins moist. Having arisen from the congealing, rancid blood of the thousand-mile-tall embodiment of primordial chaos Ythul when it spilled from his body on the Day of Wrath, the te’Ythul hid themselves in secret parts of the world, far from the other races towards which they were and are profoundly hostile. Many have become masters of manipulating the obsidian oil, giving them access to arcane and eldritch powers unknown and forbidden to the rest of Saturn’s peoples. A few have even taken to dabbling in anti-colour, a sinister and unholy force of unknown origins. With their dozens of tentacles, they are formidable and terrifying foes for any adventurers who encounter them, whether in the depths of the earth or secreted within foul swamps or roaming the dusk-shrouded undergrowth of Saturn’s rainforests.
{Classical Mythology equivalent: Cyclopes}
Syngnals are the messengers and servants of Phragma, the trickster goddess of magic. These small, seahorse-like creatures flit around, gradually influencing the course of Saturnian history in the direction Phragma would like it to go. Unfortunately for her, they aren’t very good at their jobs. Or maybe they are…
{Classical Mythology equivalent: Hippocampus}
Titanians and Uberonians are humanoids not native to Saturn; instead, they originated on Saturn’s moon Voeba. However, when Voeba was destroyed during the Day of Wrath, its inhabitants were forced to migrate elsewhere, to other moons. One group settled on Titan; the other, after finding their first choice of Hyperion unsuitable, eventually formed a new society on Rhea. Not being native Saturnians, they only have four limbs, rather than the standard six, and they have a higher level of technology than the Saturnians, boasting flying saucers, rocket ships, and rayguns. Since the Day of Wrath, they have been locked in a cold war for control of Saturn’s moons and rings, largely ignoring the planet itself, which they regard as inhabited by primitives. Of the two, the Titanian are marginally more benevolent, although both nations feel perfectly free to abduct Saturnians and probe them, or, in the case of the Uberonians, enslave them for their own amusement. This latter habit is frowned upon by the Titanians, who attempt to enforce what they call the “First Order”, which states that more advanced and sophisticated and, frankly, intelligent races are not supposed to meddle in the affairs of primitives, because primitives, with their primitive planet-bound brains, simply cannot grasp how dangerous even a single piece of Titanian or Uberonian technology can be to a witless primitive. That raygun? Put it down. That com-talker? Put it down. That belt buckle? Put it down! The Titanian Ring Patrol, with its stalwart band of Space Marshals, attempts to enforce the law on a largely lawless Ring system, but even they periodically break the First Order, usually because the Uberonians broke it first or because the primitives had already been exposed to advanced technology or because the captain really didn’t feel like following it.
{Norse Mythology equivalent: Ljósálfar and Dökkálfar}
The Shimmering Demons, like the Titanians and Uberonians, are not native to Saturn. In fact, no one knows where they come from, exactly. What is known is that they don’t seem to be entirely…here. Flickering in and out of perception, they are found throughout Saturn, usually as traders, but what they trade in is…odd. Want wealth? They’re happy to oblige, in exchange for a handful of twigs. Want power? Sure thing; you’ll just need to give them your happiest memory. Want immortality? It only costs a broken sword. Want true love? Not a problem—but you’ll be sacrificing all the messy complexity of a real relationship…which the demons are glad to take off your hands. It’s been noticed that people who deal with them come away from the transaction a little…flatter, somehow; a little more two-dimensional. Those of the demons who aren’t engaged in trade are busy measuring. They measure everything, absolutely everything—from the diameter of that tree to exactly how much of a “hero” you are--and when they aren’t measuring, they’re cataloguing. They catalog everything. Even people. They would classify you as a web-based amateur worldbuilder grade B+ (not to be confused with a web-based amateur worldbuilder grade B++). Would you be interested in being reclassified as a web-based amateur worldbuilder grade A---? They have an installment plan…
{Classical Mythology equivalent: none}

I plan on visiting a contractor’s office tomorrow to let him see how it feels.
DISCLAIMER: I have taken the liberty to use substitute names for the people involved. As many have noted in the comments, the dialogue feels out of place and weirdly-spaced. I’ll admit things have been somewhat paraphrased and summarized. Please keep that in mind as you read.
I went into my local hardware store tonight for a quick trip to pick up some supplies I was running low on. Quick in and out trip, 15 minutes at most. Sad to say it didn’t end up being a fast trip because when I arrived at the paint counter, I was stuck behind a contractor who wanted to cause a scene.
The guy in front of me was with his colleague, and they were arguing loudly about which paint finish to choose. They had a substantial number of paint cans on the counter, including some expensive specialty paints. When the contractor got to the counter, he froze and began searching around for an associate, who I presume he wanted to come and mix the paint for him.
The problem was that he didn’t place any orders. He just locked up and stared directly at a young woman who was busy stocking shelves in the next aisle over. After about 30 - 45 seconds of not saying anything, he loudly shouted, “Hey, you!” in his most condescending tone, followed by “Can you come here and mix my damn paint already?!”
His tactic worked, as the employee in question immediately put down her items and walked over. He was doing that typical arms-crossed stance, looking like everything was a giant inconvenience, and I will note, the man still hadn’t specified any of the paints yet.
When this young woman was in speaking range, the contractor began to berate her. “It’s frustrating to see staff just standing around doing nothing when they should be helping customers. Can you do your job and mix my paint?”
“Excuse me?” she responded.
“You heard me. Get off your butt and mix my paint so I can get out of here.”
Now, I would like to note a few things about this interaction up to this point. First, this individual was still in a work uniform…a branded polo for a local contracting company that I won’t name here, but one in which I know the owner pretty well. He’s a family friend. Second, he was still wearing his name tag (Mark, somehow I hope you’re competent enough to find your way here so you can see this story). Because of this, I knew how to address him.
Eventually, he asked the associate very rudely if she’s going to mix his paint, and she flat out told him, “No, I don’t think so. Not after how you’ve treated me. You can talk with my manager.” Good for her. She got on a walkie and called for a manager to come to the paint counter the contractor was towering over and briskly walked off towards the Customer Service counter at the front of the store. The contractor starts loudly complaining about how this is all nonsense and he’s just expressing his rights.
It was at this point where I actually found some courage and decided to give my opinion, unsolicited, just so this guy could get an outside perspective on how much of a jerk he was being. “Excuse me, but your rights don’t protect you from looking like a jerk to random strangers in a hardware store when you treat other people like trash.” The man wheeled around and locked eyes with me. “What did you just say to me?” I just smirked and said, “Oh, hard of hearing are we? I’m pretty sure you heard what I said.”
The man visibly shook on the spot. “This isn’t any of your business, so butt out!”
“I disagree. When I see someone acting like a bully for no good reason, I make it a point to speak up. You seem to think that by claiming your rights, you can say whatever you want without consequence, but that isn’t how it works, sir. Your rights protect you from government overreach for speaking your mind, but they don’t protect you from the consequences you face from others for your words or your actions.”
“That’s beside the point. I’m sick and tired of these lazy workers doing nothing and getting paid for it.” He responded, rather loudly and unaware that there were quite a few people staring at this point. Hooray. Ignorance has entered the chat.
The manager showed up, and he starts in on how he ordered his paint and that the associate in question was VERY rude to him and refused to serve him. He started stating that she told him he wouldn’t get help because he was a contractor when I interjected again.
“Sir, that is NOT what happened. This gentleman didn’t place any orders and immediately started shouting at your employee, just for the sake of being upset. He was rude, unpleasant, and even made unnecessary comments.”
He wheeled around at me again and yelled, “Shut up and mind your business!” before going on his tirade again. Something about lazy workers, something about his rights and speaking his mind.
“You know, this is very unfair of you.” I started again. “You’ve put that poor girl in an unwinnable situation. Now that you’ve raised this untrue complaint, her manager is going to have to have words with her even though she hasn’t done anything wrong. Does that sound fair to you, Mark?” I don’t think he realized he was still in uniform, because he looked at me puzzled at how I knew his name. “How would YOU feel if someone came into your place of business and told your boss a bunch of lies about how YOU were treating them unfairly when you knew perfectly well that it was a lie? Or even better, how would your boss react if he knew you were acting like this WHILE STILL IN UNIFORM with his place of business plastered all over your chest?” When he heard me say the name of his boss, he stopped cold. “Yes Mark. I know your boss VERY well, and I think I might be paying him a visit tomorrow. That is unless you decide to apologize to that girl for being a lying prick instead.”
The guy then became very rushed and suddenly in a colossal hurry. He muttered something about people not minding their own business, to which I replied with, “I’m just eXpReSsInG mY RiGhTs!” Spongebob sarcastic voice and all. He finally placed his paint orders, and the manager oversaw the mixing. His colleague started in about how I better not show up to his office tomorrow…something directed at me, but I wasn’t paying him any attention and brushed him off. I was just staring at Mark and watching him pack up his paint.
Eventually, he got all of his paint cans into his cart and he marched out, but he didn’t apologize to the manager or the employee and gave me a hearty, “Go fuck yourself, asshole!” as he flipped me off. I scanned my items and paid for my supplies, but man, was I smiling from ear to ear.
Afterwards, I made it a point to go and speak with the manager and the employee in the Customer Service center. As expected, the manager was having a conversation with the employee about that customer, and she thanked me for speaking up. I’ve worked retail before, so I know what it’s like having to deal with jerks like Mark. It’d be a cold day in hell before I let a contractor bully an employee then weasel his way into a victim role with management. Not on my watch.
So now my next play is to show up to this contracting office tomorrow. I really hope Mark is there. I hope he’s the opener. I’m going to walk in and just smile at him. Ask to see his manager. Then I think I’m going to go in and just weave the NICEST story about how he treated the employees at the hardware store, so much so that I was compelled to stop in and tell his boss that he has a real winner on his hands, and that I’m a customer for life now.
Maybe that way, he might get a message. MAYBE, he will realise that I could have started a whole shitstorm for him, but I chose not to, because unlike him, I’m not a jerk.
tl;dr (For the upset contractors in this thread who don’t like reading, it seems): Contractor got big mad for no reason and berated a hardware store employee while he himself was wearing his work uniform. I’ll be paying his boss, a family friend, a visit tomorrow to discuss his employee’s behaviour while still representing his place of work.

Hey and hi! I previously posted these Character Chats in order to fill the void when the comic was on involuntary hiatus, and I'm pleased to hear that it was received positively and people were asking for more. I couldn't really commit to it once the hiatus was over, since I've got a job and all. But good news, my whole team got laid off! I've got a lot more time on my hands now, so I think I'll keep this series going for a few weeks on Tuesdays and Thursdays or so. If anyone complains about me surfing reddit at work during my notice period... well, what are they gonna do, fire me?
Today my giant novely ouija board has selected Prince Aaronev Tarvek Sturmvoraus. Our first Spark, and first main character, but somehow our third Valois out of five picks.
Tarvek is a member of the large and complicated Valois family tree, descended from our pal Andronicus Valois, the Storm King. He is the son of Prince Aaronev Sturmvoraus VI of Sturmhalten and an unknown mother, and the older brother of Anevka Sturmvoraus. He and Anevka share the same grandmother with the von Bliztengaard siblings and Violetta, making them all cousins. The Selnikovs may also be close family members, as their main residence is in Sturmhalten. Tarvek also calls Zulenna a cousin at one point.
The Storm King conspiracy among the Fifty Families was said to be fizzling out in the time before the comic, but the Mongfish family (i.e. Lucrezia) got involved and whipped them all into shape. Besides making most of the Knights of Jove Lucrezia loyalists, part of this involvment was ensuring there was a suitable male heir to the Storm King using Spark sceince, which ended up producing, at minimum, Tarvek and Martellus von Blitzengaard. The degree to which Tarvek's mother was involved and consenting is unknown. While we don't know how much was done, Tarvek is a powerful Spark, physically fit, and quite intelligent, so mission accomplished I suppose (though Tarvek does wear these tiny pince-nez around, so he may have poor vision - nice going, Lucrezia).
We don't have a family tree or anything, so we need to take the story's word that Tarvek's claim for being a direct heir of Andronicus is one of the most direct, if not the strongest overall. Two of the strongest claimants, Tarvek and Martellus, share a grandmother, so presumably their legitimacy is either through her or her late husband. Grandmama is once referred to with the title "Dowager Princess of Sturmhalten", it's possible Aaronev inherited his title as Prince of Sturmhalten by being her son. On the other hand, Tarvek also says that his descent comes down through his mother, so maybe she's Grandmama's child instead? Or it's wrong to trace back things to this set of grandparents after all? The family tree is thrown for another loop when Orotine declares Martellus a third-place heir rather than the commonly assumed second-place, so now who's in second place and how's that guy related to Tarvek's family tree, and... it's at this point I throw up my hands in exasperation.
Tarvek spent some of his early childhood as a political hostage on Castle Wulfenbach, being raised with other hostages by von Pinn. Tarvek recalls this time fondly, and in particular became good friends with Gil, whose identity was still hidden. When the two of them were hunting for secrets, hoping to discover Gil's lineage, they discover a red-herring left by the Baron. While Tarvek didn't buy it and tried to dig further, he got caught. Along with some snitching from Gil, this got him expelled from the Castle. Of course, everyone was spying abord the Castle, and Tarvek was just the only one kicked out. My assumption is that the Baron wasn't worried about Gil's identity being exposed, but didn't approve of Gil getting close with Tarvek for one reason or another and arranged to destroy the friendship.
He spent his remaining childhood in Sturmhalten, where he was wrapped up in family scheming, including Aaronev's schemes with the Other. Besides Aaronev, he also spent time with Anevka and Violetta during this period, and received some Smoke Knight training. He later goes to Paris for his higher education, where he was a good student and made friendships with influential young people like Colette and Neena. He was also involuntarily dragged into Gil's college adventures, where he became, uh, "acquainted" with disreputable characters like Bangladesh Dupree and Zola. He's called back to Sturmhalten after completing his education.
As a young adult, Tarvek's goals are initially to learn all he can from the Other conspiracy in Sturmhalten, destroy them afterwards, use this knowledge to overthrow the Baron, become Storm King, get the Fifty Families under control, and bring peace and prosperity to his new empire. However, Aaronev is in charge in Sturmhalten, and has different ideas. Tarvek detests his father and the Other conspiracy he's involved with, but cooperates with them to stay in their good graces and learn all he can. Tarvek attempts to act as a moderating influence on Aaronev, but Aaronev is too far gone to pull back. Aaronev ends up capturing nearly all the young female Sparks in Europa beneath the Baron's nose, and destroys them utterly trying to implant copies of Lucrezia into their minds, while Tarvek doesn't do much more than watch.
Aaronev eventually subjects his daughter Anevka to the treatment, nearly killing her. The Circus of Adventure happens to be in town, and as an expert on the Muses, Tarvek recognizes Tinka as a van Rijn original when she performs. Tarvek has his men abduct Tinka, and uses her as the basis for building a masterpiece clank which would connect to Anevka's mind and allow her to move and speak while her body was comatose. For what it's worth, he does try to pay the Circus after the fact, but they naturally ran like hell out of town. Tinka is eventually damaged beyond his ability to repair by Aaronev.
After this, he also conspires (or pretends to conspire) with Anevka to use her clank body's voice box to imitate Lucrezia's ability to command revenants, and use that ability to overthrow Aaronev and the Baron. When the Circus comes back to town with Agatha in tow, she's found out as Lucrezia's daughter at a show, with more beans being spilled later when Agatha's drugged with a truth serum. Aaronev tries to throw her in the Lucrezia-machine, but Anevka launches her coup right then, and finalizes her voice box by studying Agatha's own voice. Tarvek, having fallen for Agatha basically immediately, attempts to smuggle Agatha out of town under Anevka's nose, but the Geisters eventually get Lucrezia in her head anyway.
Tarvek, at this point, wants to integrate Agatha into his plan to use Other technology to usurp the Baron, which means keeping her safely at his side. This means both cooperating with Lucrezia to learn from her to begin with and protect Agatha's body, and also sabotaging Agatha's efforts at surrendering herself to the Baron for the greater good. One his deals with Lucrezia is making a clank head imprinted with a Lucrezia copy, designed to fit onto Avenka's clank body. Tarvek lures in Anevka for Lucrezia, and after some back-and-forth betrayals, eventually deactivates Anevka's head and puts her in storage, essentially killing her for the time being. Juggling Agatha, Lucrezia, and now a second Lucrezia proves too much for Tarvek once the Baron's troops arrive in Sturmhalten, and he ends up slashed in the gut, shot, and abandoned in the ensuing chaos.
Tarvek ends up in the Great Hospital in Mechanicsburg, as one of many of the injured from Sturmhalten. Violetta, who had been assigned to Mechanicsburg by Tarvek to keep her out of the proverbial firing line, manages to get him out of custody in the hospital... but inside of Castle Heterodyne instead, which is something of a lateral move. After connecting up with Agatha, Taevek comes down with Hogfarb's Respelendent Immolation, either due to traipsing about Castle Heterodyne of all places while wounded, or, Tarvek speculates, as a poisoning attempt from his own extended family. Gil is recruited to help with curing him, and after extensive bickering, infections, distractions, complications, and one apotheosis, he's back in good health. Tarvek attempts to help fix the Castle, and aid Agatha however he can, including fighting with Lucrezia and Vole, and attempting to strangle Zola. His bickering with Gil during this time mostly puts him on the defensive and has Tarvek trying to justify his actions, but he eventually does has a quiet epiphany.
He eventually gets grabbed by Other in a case of mistaken identity, and his quick analytical skills wind up placing him in charge of the Wulfenbach fleet's grand strategy temporarily - it's at gunpoint, but Boris assesses that he's really doing what's in the best interest of the Empire. He has to scurry off when Klaus comes onto the scene, placing him in a perfect position to recruit the Empire's Vespiary Squad and their weasels when Klaus turns on them. Notably, he risks life and limb rescuing a squad member, who he needs of course, but also Jorgi, who mostly annoys him. He sends the Vespiary Squad to hiding places abroad. As the battle for Mechanicsburg wraps up, Tarvek ends up stabbed with a poisoned dagger by Martellus just before the time-stop.
Post time-skip, Gil dedicates extensive resources towards getting Tarvek out of the time stop. Tarvek isn't able to do much before being kidnapped by the Immortal Library, and then kidnapped by Mister Obsidian on behalf of Grandmama. He does manage to breathe a bit in Paris, before being kidnapped by Mister Obsidian again on behalf of Seffie, to be sent to England. But en route aboard a pirate vessel, he's (shockingly) interrupted by a kidnapping attempt, this time for Grandmama again. Martellus sent assassins after Tarvek to interrupt the interruption, leading to bloody battle between Seffie's pirates, Grandmama's Smoke Knights, Martellus' Knights of the Hunt, and poor Tarvek. After being rescued by Gil, Tarvek flips the script, and he and Bang kidnap Gil instead, changing course to England.
In England, he can finally, you know, not get kidnapped for a bit. He decides to join Agatha in the Royal Society, and despite nearly getting strangled by Higgs, manages to reach Agatha and help work on curing her of Lucrezia, and curing Gil of Klaus. After interminable delays like a undersea cult, briefly seeing beyond time, punching Tweedle, and a revenant attack, they eventually pull it all off.
Later, in the war against the Polar Lords, Tarvek is essentially given the role of Gil's official treacherous vizier. On paper, helping the Empire helps keep him safe to further his own ambitions, but in practice, Tarvek seems more focused on doing good by his friends than anything to do with becoming Storm King.
Whew! And that's the short synopsis!
As a Spark, Tarvek's specialty is masterwork clanks in the van Rijn mold. His Anevka clank maintains full sentience even after any organic parts it was attached to died off, and continues to be used by Lucrezia to devastating effect. He also has a knack for rapid analysis, such as being able to understand the Wulfenbach fleet's strategy with just a glance. It's possible his political aptitude, scheming skills and ability to anticipate people's actions are a byproduct of his spark, but it may also just be the natural result of his upbringing. He is unusually composed for a Spark, and is very rarely seen in the Madness Place, and never for very long.
Beyond the Spark and his cunning, Tarvek also received some Smoke Knight training, making him skilled in martial arts and sleight of hand. That said, he'd prefer not to get in fights, and his first resort use his Spark or guile to get out safely (his second resort is just shooting them, with a gun). He also has a passion for fashion design, particularly lady's fashion.
Besides his conquer-Europa ambitions, Tarvek seems primarily driven to help and protect the people he loves, but his preferred tactics for doing so are often underhanded, or screw over people that he doesn't particularly love. Tarvek is the kind of guy who has to come to the conclusion that mind-control slavery is bad in general, rather than bad for people I know. He does come to that conclusion on his own, so kudos for that, but for a lot of people it's not even something you have to think about. Tarvek is also quick to use "they'd kill me if I tried, I had no choice" as a defense, but never quite understands that there was always a choice available he didn't consider - die trying. That all said, Tarvek is in generally improving his character over time, and wants to do the right thing, both in the "greater good" sense and doing right by other people individually, and finds himself frustrated at himself that he's often failed. I don't want to discuss Tarvek's ethics too much further here, since there's a great deal to talk about and this is supposed to be a discussion thread! Why do I have to do all the work?
Major Relationships:

• Agatha: Tarvek fell for Agatha pretty damn hard, internally logging her as "future bride", and even at his scummiest times in Sturmhalten was trying to act in her best interest, and just ignoring what she actually wanted and also fucking it up anyway. By the time of the Castle arc, Tarvek has mostly thrown away all of his own ambitions in favor of working for Agatha's, even in moments when he feels pretty hopeless about his actual prospects as a suitor. One major advantage in his court is that he's able to actually articulate his feelings like an adult.
  
• Gil: It's been a true roller coaster for these two, from friends to enemies to rivals to allies to secret lovers. It takes a great deal of bonding for their distrust of one another to fall away, and after the time skip Tarvek lists Agatha and Gil (and, by implication, Violetta) as the only people left he really cares about, and the two of them spend a lot more time hugging than you would have expected.
  
• Violetta: Tarvek spent a good deal of his childhood with Violetta, and earnestly tried to protect her. In natural early-Tarvek style, it was by ignoring her wishes and leaving her in the dark, but points for trying. They have a bickering siblings type of relationship, and Violetta is fine trash talking him despite the power imbalance between them. Tarvek is pretty disappointed that he's rebuffed when trying to sincerely express that he's glad she's alive, since she expects childish taunts out of him.
  
• Aaronev: Tarvek really hates Aaronev for all the horrible things he's done, especially for putting Anevka through the machine, and spends about two seconds mourning after he's killed. Tarvek had been play-acting as a loyal son for years, and it's a bit tragic that Aaronev bought his act wholesale - what little interaction we see suggests that Aaronev, scumbag that he is, did really like Tarvek.
  
• Anevka: Tarvek did not take it well when it seemed Anevka was going to die, and went to extreme measures to save her. But Tarvek doesn't assign the same level of personhood to the Anevka clank after the original Anevka dies (he's generally not the best at the whole "clanks are people too" concept), and eventually "kills" her by turning her off and throwing her head in a box, where she probably still remains if Sturmhalten hasn't been razed to the ground.
  
• Lucrezia: While most people hate the Other on a conceptual level, Tarvek has spent enough time with her to really begin to hate her on a personal level. He's aware of her foibles, such as her susceptibility to flattery, and tries to take advantage when he can. His more personal knowledge also makes him better able to detect when Lucrezia is taking over for Agatha than most.
  
• Higgs: Like many, Tarvek cottons on that Higgs has a secret in Castle Heterodyne. Tarvek does try to keep it under his hat and make excuses on his behalf, but can't resist teasing Higgs despite him being incredibly dangerous. Tarvek openly confronting Higgs about his identity later on nearly gets him strangled to death. Despite that, Tarvek and Higgs have formed a good rapport, and have solid mutual respect. He's even one of the people Tarvek pours his heart out to when he thinks Violetta is dead.
  
• Neena: Neena has a bit of a crush on Tarvek, and Tarvek for his part does some light flirting at the ball but otherwise doesn't think about her much at this point. It's an odd match for someone like Tarvek, since Neena is earnest, enthusiastic, and completely lacking in guile. Maybe that's exactly what someone like him needs - stranger things have happened!
  
• Martellus: As two men aiming for the same throne, Martellus and Tarvek are natural enemies. Tarvek obviously dislikes Martellus - and even gets a good punch in - but doesn't take any moves to stop Martellus' forward momentum, and makes no moves towards legitimizing his claim as Storm King beyond not being dead. His strategy may be to just give Martellus enough rope to hang himself with, but it may also show genuine disinterest in this whole Storm King business.
  

One thing that stands out to me is that the advice for getting laid while you are either cohabing and/or are going through a divorce is abstinence. It's good advice, to be sure, but in reality works about as well as teaching only abstinence in school - leaves you without the knowledge you need to succeed!
Basically, the steps below are designed to destroy her map of you. She knows what you do, she knows your routine, and women are pretty good at knowing the importance of suddenly different things. You will have to destroy her ability to know what to expect and normalize unpredictability.

1. Set a pin for your phone!

1A. Start by imagining you have something to hide on your phone. Put it on vibrate, keep it on your person at all times around her, if you set it down, set it down facedown. Don't answer a single text message in front of her, but you can and should use it to check the weather or emails, or surf the web. She probably won't say a single thing, but she is GOING to notice this change and now she's suspicious. Silence her messages - she's used to you responding quickly and she WILL find reasons to contact you just to see if you respond quickly. You will need to slow down communication with her - normalize your replies taking a long time. If she calls don't always pick up. Let it go to VM, or text her that you are busy, or will call back, or whatever. The goal of 1A is to break her expectation of you replying quickly so that it doesn't really stand out when you go on dates later.
1B. Pick a few days each and every week to be out of the house. Don't share what you are doing immediately, make her work for it. She may or may not ask for a while, but she's paying attention. What should you do? Well, I suggest buying some new clothes, try out a few gyms, go for a hike, try out new places to eat by yourself, check out bars and find a few cool ones at different parts of the area you are in, try out a musical instrument lesson, go to car meets, go to biker meets (Harley dealerships have huge bike meets and they cook), play poker, go fishing.... It doesn't matter WHAT you do specifically, just that you ARE actually doing things, and you SHOULD be doing things you would never normally do. Take pictures. You should do this for a minimum of 1 month.
***Why? Well, you don't really know who you are as a single man, and this step is partly to help you figure that out, while shattering her map of 'what you do.' At the same time, you are learning to be less dependent on her for emotional support, simply by slowing down communication with her and creating that distance.

1. This step depends on her, not you. She is going to question you about all these new things and probably outright accuse you of having another girl. Tell her you don't have one (don't get defensive), and if you can show a picture of what you were doing that triggered her accusations, then do it. Tell her you are doing new things because you are a single man again, and you need to discover who you are without her now. Tell her you have no interest in another relationship - that you have decided to work on yourself and focus on being happy. All of those things are true, and you should save the bulk of what you'll say for when she confronts you. The goal here is to get her to accept the IDEA you might actually be working on yourself and shutting her out - she's not going to buy it, but this casts doubt in her mind you found another woman, and that's good enough to continue to step 3.
   
2. CHANGE YOUR PHONES PIN CODE! She probably has it by now. We are about to actually have something to hide.
   
3. Sign up for whatever online dating apps, but you need to turn OFF banner alerts! This should be obvious, but don't bring her back to your house, no matter how sure you are your STBXW isn't going to be home or show up. Condoms... this will get you caught. Either buy and dispose of the whole pack (never bring them home) or find a really good spot to hide them in your car that she'll never find.
   
4. Great, now you found some girl and she's making you happy, right? Getting laid, she probably makes you feel like a Million $s. Good. You'll want to see her constantly because you just realized how terrible you have actually been treated, don't. Your STBXW will say some hurtful and mean things and you'll want to drop that you are and have been banging someone else... don't. If your STBXW feels like she's getting more suspicious end things with 'new girl,' let the situation cool and find a new, new girl... or don't, and continue to work on yourself.
   

Why go through all of this? Because even if you stop at step 3 you've helped yourself! Interestingly, like many can attest to, the moment you find another woman she'll be interested in you again. The mere idea that you could do new things and be happy without her will bring her right back - like the happiness sucking harpie she is.
Lastly, I want to say one more time, that I think NOT sleeping around until after your divorce has been signed by a judge is by far the smarter thing to do. What I am describing here is essentially OPSEC for having an affair, but this level of effort is required because while she may be able to get laid without consequence, the system is not 'for you' and she will make sure you get every inch of the justice d*ck without any lube if she finds out you are plowing the younger, hotter, fun version of her.

My whole life I was known for my beauty. My parents were always told how beautiful i was. Even as a small child. Then teens hit and I got sooooo much attention. I got called a model and told I was beautiful by strangers so frequently. Men and women. There wasnt a day I went to a store and didnt get any kind of comment or attention. Up until 21 this happened. Still kinda happened up until 26 but not as much. At 24 guys would call my work and leave messages saying i was beautiful. I was also smart and tough. I had a lot going for me. The looks were always my pride and joy in my head, what I cared about the most. However, i was always so insecure.
I got addicted to this attention especially because of my childhood abuse.
Now at 27 im literally invisible. I havent gained weight. Kinda the same, just all the stress and age is finally hitting. I have horirble abusive relationships throughout the years and havent always taken great care of myself. Its catching up
I am not saying this stuff to brag about my past, it means nothing because its all gone now. I just dont even know how to feel good about myself. Its like ive lost my identity. I see no point in fillers, botox or surgery. Natural beauty is the best and I will look fake im afraid.
I havent spent much time building hobbies or a big personality. I guess I could work on this?
I dont even like going to adult sports groups because I am no longer the pretty one in the group. I dont even like going to the grocery store most of the time. I used to gloat to myself and think things like "this ugly old bitch thinks she looks good, but shes got nothing on me". Now maybe im facing the karma?
Any kind of advice?
Does anyone feel the same? I feel so alone because most people cant relate to being so looks oriented. I say stuff about this topic and it just triggers people. I dont need to hear that my age is young. The reality is my looks are fading, i had real beauty, and that goes with age. Theres no glowing up for me, maybe sure I can put in effort, but theres no way I could be like my younger self because there was much I could improve on back then

SPOILERS AHEAD!!!! For those who haven't played this game (yet), please ignore this post 🙏
y'all I'm still grinding the ouranos island rn so by far, lemme rank the islands I've played through (from best to worst)

1. Kronos Island (Best) Reason being, this island was solid, ngl. I was able to capture all the memory tokens as I go and grind without having to worry about how many more tokens do I have to acquire in order to talk to Amy. Plus, the map was laid out beautifully and the travelling was a lot easier.
   
2. Rhea Island (Second best) Ngl, this one's real solid. like the only objective is to just shut those towers down and we're good to go. The reason why this falls second is bc I had to put a bit more effort to grind through the rails or wall runs or platforms (sometimes the camera angle fucks up a bit and it kinda becomes trickier to see the next path). But overall, I had fun w this island ngl
   
3. Ouranos Island (Mid) Currently playing through this rn so this might be subject to changes later (if I happen to come back and check on this feed). Unlike Amy, tails and knucks, this one's got a lot of grinding to do. like I needa collect exorbitant amount of memory tokens to talk to sage and so far I couldn't see any side quests too (FYI, I've just collected the blue emerald and now I'm off to collect the vault keys for the next emerald). Besides, I feel like I'm lost in this island sometimes looking at how I keep coming back to the same spots back and forth ☠ (skill issue, ik shush)
   
4. Ares Island (Second worst) This one's got me touching my nose by wrapping my hand all the way behind my head and touch it from the other side. Legit I was gonna get the white emerald that stood on a SMALL mountain above the mountain I stood. Naturally, my instinct was to just use boost and speed up ahead but alas, I slip back to the mountain I was standing onto earlier. it legit had me searching for a route only to realise that there's this rail grinding shi from about 10 feet away from the mountain in order to get to the vault that's legit RIGHT above me (that I could see it in my naked eye) Plus, the amount of small passages and dead-ends had me ☠☠☠☠ like I'm tryna follow the cursor that's directing me to a vault or knucks by using those short passages (as a shortcut) only to find myself either looping the mountain or just hit the dead end ☠
   
5. Chaos Island (Worst) Nothing, just ☠☠☠☠☠☠☠. I have no words to describe the amount of hate I have for this island so I'll rather save my words and your time ☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠
   

TLDR

• CS graduate.
• Never worked in tech.
• But building web apps 7+ years as hobby and freelancer.
• Want to kick off my web dev career.
• What do I put on my resume?

I graduated in Computer Science in 2011, but instead of pursuing a career in tech I spent the next 7 years building and running a small travel agency with my brother. By 2018, I got burnt out, sold my shares, and with my savings decided to travel.
So with my savings, the privileged Westerner that I am, I relocated to Asia and Latin America where my Euro would go far, and went all-in on indiehacking.
My goal was essentially to build my own apps and make a living from that.
I was confident that within 2 years I'd be making a good living from this.
Well, 2 years pass. Still no money. Savings drying up. Picked up some freelance work on the side to pay the bills while continuing to indiehack..
2 years became 3, then 4, then 5... and now here I am 6 years later and I'm making less than $1k a month coding 50-60 hours a week.
Talk about sunk-cost fallacy...
The miserable money I am making is purely from my freelance work (which for the most part I hate... WordPress, or some frontend stuff, nothing backend heavy which is my real expertise).
So I've come to realise I suck at sales. I suck at marketing. And really all I want to do so is work on interesting technical problems.
And at the ripe age of 36, I can now understand why people get day jobs lol
And now to get to my question: How do I go about getting my first tech job?
I have 7+ years amateur experience (PHP, Python and JavaScript) But 0 years professional. So I understand I would need to start from the bottom as a Junior Developer.
I haven't applied for a job since I was 19. No idea how to go about writing a resume for someone in my circumstances.

Portfolio

I have a relatively large portfolio of personal projects (mostly apps and SaaS)
In terms of "real projects", my client work is either:

• not really relevant to the role I want (mostly WordPress, landing pages)
• something not so easily demonstratable
• under NDA and cannot disclose

Qualifications

• I hold a BSc Hons in Computer Science (graduated in 2011)

GitHub

• haven't contributed to open-source projects
• have 6+ years of commits (mostly Laravel) - more than happy to open-source a couple of big projects

Technologies

Laravel, Vue.js, SQL, Nginx, Docker, Ubuntu, Linux, git, Tailwind, JavaScript, PHP, HTML, CSS, Filament, Statamic, Alpine, Livewire, Nuxt, WordPress, Python, Django
Furthermore, I'm an EU national and open to relocating to a new country for work.
My biggest dilemma, is having no idea what to put in my resume since I have zero relevant work experience.
Should I just be upfront and say I have no professional work experience?
My gut feeling is that most employers aren't keen on hiring someone with my track record (i.e. being self-employed and freelance... ok fine... unemployed).
Furthermore, they might be concerned that I plan to open my own business in the future and go in competition with them. It's a reasonable concern.
So what to put on my resume as a 36 year old aspiring software/web developer with no relevant work experience?
No need to sugar-coat your answers. Be as blunt and direct as you want. I appreciate all advise.

Hey y'all...so this has to be one of the craziest things that's ever happened to me and I really wanted to share it. Buckle up cause it's a long one...sorry in advance lol.
It started in 2019 I (26f but back then 21) met this dude (23m at the time) on kik from the Netherlands, let's call him...butthole. So, me and butthole hit it off, we're vibing, we're flirting, all that shebang.
We decide to date online long distance (cause I still lived in America at the time) so we text every day and we call a lot and it's just sooo nice. He was really sweet and nice to me. Well, August of that year I went on a trip to Ireland and got SA'd while there we'd been dating for 3 months at this point.
Once I got back home I finally worked up the nerve to tell him cause I legit had PTSD from that shit and when I did, he got mad at me. He accused me of cheating...I was like wtf?? So we broke up and went no contact and that was that.
Until
2020 it's lockdown....my diddly dumbass was lonely and bored and decided to text him! Like girl wtf was I thinkin? So I text him and he ends up apologizing for accusing me of cheating. He realized he was wrong and just like that, we went back to vibing and flirting. We're also making low key plans for me to visit him once lockdown is lifted too. After a few days of this I'm thinkin we're gonna get back together. But he says to me "I have something to tell you and you're gonna get mad at me".
And I'm like....ok? I didn't even know what to think like no clue what it could be (cause I'm dumb lol) And he goes "so I'm actually living with a girl who is (and I quote) officially my girlfriend". Oh man I was pissed and really hurt...like that fucking hypocrite!! So he goes on to explain they'd been dating for 2 Y E A R S!!
Anyway, so I'm dumb and was so in love and had no self esteem and thought he was the best I could get so I ask if he wants to leave her. He was like yea but we have a house together and I recently lost my job because of the pandemic so it'd screw us both over if I left now. I should've run right then and there but nooooo.
So I was like "you want to leave her and be with me right? Like, you will right?" And he said yes, I want to be with you, I'll leave if I can, blah blah blah." After a couple weeks of us acting coupley, sexting, sending pics, flirting and shit I woke up one day and realized, he's never gonna leave her for me. Ever. So....I decided I have to find this girl and tell her cause this is bullshit.
Problem is...I know nothing about her and apparently barely anything about him. He wouldn't tell me her name or anything. And he told me back in 2019 that he doesn't have social media (I should've known that was a lie cause who doesn't at least have facebook?) So I have nothing except his first and last name (later I find out he lied about how his last name is spelled and he gave me his nickname instead of his actual first name!...bro is a pathological liar I s2g!)
I tried looking for him on social media (obviously I didn't find him) I would try to ask about her name, but like in a really chill way, obviously he wouldn't tell me. I got desperate and googled Netherlands chat sites, and got on one and legit asked each person if they knew butthole mcbuttface from Rotterdam...I knew it was a long shot but I had to try.
That ended in a flop (well not entirely but I'll get back to that later) So then I get real crafty. I decide that I'm gonna play an adult fun game with him. I ask a question, he answers it truthfully and he gets a "reward". So I made sure to write out all the questions, starting with super innocent ones and I put the really revealing ones later cause I figured he'd be thinking with his other head at that point so he'd answer anything I asked.
We didn't do this over video call, we texted and I sent videos doing the thing (that way I could write down his answers) I did a lot of shit I'm not proud of. But I got the answers I needed. So I went all FBI and I got the specific area he lived from him and I ended up finding roughly where his house is, I was hoping I could find her name somewhere with that but it was a bust.
I tried to use the other answers to find stuff but I got nothing. I then decide to confront him over one of the answers (his brother's name) cause I legit thought he lied, it didn't sound like a name a Dutch person would have. He told me it was the truth. It's a really weird name for someone in the Netherlands so I looked him up on Facebook and I FOUND THAT BITCH!
That's how I realized he gave me the wrong spelling of his last name. So through his brother I found butthole's page and through butthole's page I found her!!! It took me weeks to find her! I was so shooketh! I couldn't believe I actually did it! So I go and look through her profile for a bit and I see that a few days before we played that game he FUCKIN PROPOSED TO HER!!!
I literally screamed when I saw that...I was so pissed and upset that he did that to her..... So I take a shit ton of screenshots and send her a message basically telling her everything. And she responded like "omg thank you for telling me". Like she wasn't upset at me or anything and that made me so sad. We chit chatted a bit and she was telling me all this shit about how she heard he was only with her for her money and blah blah blah...and she asked me for a few more specific screenshots which I gladly sent.
Then she said that she was at work and would confront him when she was home. I was in full support mode and was like I'm here for you and I'm so sorry this happened. And she was in support mode and she said she was sorry it happened to me too. So we exchange numbers and start texting. Later she texted me saying that she was off work and she was almost home and I wished her luck. At that point I texted him saying something like bye bitch good luck and blocked him lol.
So then I waited to hear from her...I check an hour later and saw that she blocked my number....I was so confused. I genuinely wish I could know what he said to her cause y'all...she ended up staying with him and getting married.I saw the pics on Facebook lol but yea....she could do so much better like...idk how this gremlin lookin ass bitch pulled 2 girls cause he's ugly inside and out. Idk if they're still together. I haven't looked in on them since I saw the wedding pics.
So yea, that's my story...but I said I would come back to the chat site not being a complete flop. I met a dude on there and we became friends and he introduced me to a guy who is now my boyfriend of almost 4 years and I ended up moving to the Netherlands to be with him lolol....I'm nowhere near where butthole lives so I'll never run into him but yea thanks for reading!

I’m going out on a limb here, because this post is going to be a strong dose of woo. But I feel I have a duty to warn, and you people seem just weird enough to be able to get it. Read this in the voice of John Oliver if you have to, it might help.

TL;DR: Things are going to get worse before they get better. A mundane and lame, but not altogether surprising, amount of worse. Around 2045-2050, is when things finally turn around. Time to get your shit together, people.

Backstory: Back in the late 70s, a former Special Assistant to the Chief of Naval Operations, Stephan A. Schwartz, got involved in remote viewing. Schwartz started a long-term project that ran from 1978 to 1995 to ask remote viewers to look at one day in June, 2050 to see whether or not the Cold War turned into a nuclear war. He collected data from hundreds of remote viewers over thousands of sessions, over decades of time, and aggregated down the places of only broad consensus. The points where nearly everyone agreed over years and years.

What came out was while we didn’t nuke ourselves, things like the fall of the USSR, the rise of HIV/AIDS, climate change, and terrorism replacing the Cold War seemed like crazy talk at the time, but it's what the remote viewers said. To date, points of wide consensus have held accurate because they’re non-specific. It's not “on Sept 11 this will happen…” it’s “something happened, and now terrorism is why the world is a more dangerous place.”

You can watch here in 2017 where Schwartz talks about a “series of epidemics” occurring. HIV/AIDS was the first one, and last I checked, the opioid crisis, huge increases in non-communicable diseases, and COVID are all massive public health problems on a scale we didn’t used to have - even at the level that in 2017 to consider them. Then he describes Zoom meetings, and how they’re in VR by 2050. So, like I said, things get worse.
/backstory

In the last few years, Schwartz started up a new version of the 2050 project, asking remote viewers to look at the year 2060, and report on wide consensus. A summary of his work is here, with findings on the last page. (This is not investment advice… or is it? ;) I’ve been waiting around on a book with more details for 2 years now, and still nothing, so I have this and interviews as most of what he has out there to go on.
I’m a remote viewer, and I’ve had years of profound, sometimes bonkers experiences that have forced me to stop being so materialist and accept that sometimes remote viewing works. And that the universe is buck wild, but whatever.
Anyone can learn to remote view, just like anyone can learn French if they spend a lot of time every day working on something that seems cool at first, but is ultimately borderline pointless to do without a solid reason. In reality, both have too many rules and are kind of annoying to keep up every day when you’re not using it professionally. But, objectively, learning French is still worse.

….But I’ve also studied and used social science data for work, and looking at broad consensus is how we evaluate things like aggregating survey data. So I put a lot of stock in both the 2050 and 2060 projects simply based on the methodology.

You know what I don’t put a lot of stock in? Astrology.

So I made the mistake of asking astrology about the general themes forecast for the US for 2030-2045, expecting some sort of hilarious contradictions. Like “oh, 2034, Saturn is in Leo - the US elects its first kitty-cat president :3 YAY!””

Nope.
Fam (can I call you fam?) - look, Fam, let me tell you, it did not go well for me.

TL;DR of that post: Nothing contradicts Schwartz. Even the timeline of bad to worse lines up. And I didn't even tell them why I was asking about that time frame before I got a few responses back.

We go from now to bad in the early-mid 2030s, bad to worse in late 2030s/2040, then spicy worse until 2045, then come up for air by the time kindergarten-age kids of today are old enough to rent a car and drive it through Mad Max: Tornado Dustbowl II.
OK, so two woo-woo data points. Who cares, right? Just stupid woo coincidence, right? How many pretend "skeptics" are screaming "confirmation bias!" at me right now? It's not zero.

But....Then we have the unfortunate triangulation of the fact that some of the less pleasant climate change models pointing to a 2.5+ degree world, which is entirely right smack-dab in the realm of possibility right now, agree with the severity of the remote viewing predictions. Expectations of a Blue Ocean event are on track for 2036-2038ish, and the remote viewing data says something happens around 2040 that is a big deal.

The 2050 and 2060 projects both agree that there are migrations: “people flee the coasts, then the Midwest becomes uninhabitable.” But like, more uninhabitable than right now. Constant tornados and floods and drought and general bad times kind of uninhabitable, not like, thinking spaghetti in your chili is still food (I’ll fight you about this, Cincinnati! Come at me!)

Now, if you’ve made it this far, you’re probably just a podcast host desperate for content. Respect.

But for real, if you’ve made it this far, it’s important to acknowledge the fact that this is a warning. This is knowledge, not to create fear, but to inform your sound choices. To be used to guide your life. Data to keep you safe and happy and doing whatever else normal people do these days. Fidget spinners? Are those still a thing? Anyway, point is that if you’re scared, you’re doing it wrong.

And look, this is a topic I’ve looked at for a long time, so there’s no way that you won’t have questions about the nuance. I would, too. Maybe questions like “I’m not clear - are you on drugs now, or do you NEED to be on drugs?”
But I’m going to get off the internet now, and let comments pile up for a while, because we have, like….8 years left to post on IG about plates of food someone else made and you just paid for. Or however you spend your time. I have 8 years left to understand why fidget spinners are a thing before I’m taking out the ball bearings and using them for ammo.

People, get your shit together. Find community. Be compassionate and kind. Learn to garden. Get in shape. Touch grass.
And vote, FFS. Not for America’s first kitty-cat president, I mean, not YET. Vote for humans now so we can have cats later.

I am a lot, I’ll start by saying that. I have bpd and I’m an extrovert and I suppose I’m quite weird.
I met this guy D (21 at he time) when I was 19 and we dated for 9 months and I was really in love with him. This was 2 years ago. After we were together like 5 months it got abusive and we broke up for the first time, but it was toxic from the beginning, from both of us. We enabled each other and made each other worse if I’m being honest. But we were also really in love and his personality was so amazing and there were so many things I loved about him.
It ended after a really bad night where he was very violent and I felt my life was in danger. His family, especially his mum, put so so much strain on the relationship because she’s really controlling and didn’t like me.
We didn’t talk for a long time, like 1.5 years.
The first time we broke up I went to stay with my parents for the summer and I met a guy, P (22 at the time). This was about 5 months into my relationship with D, but it was over and we had gone no contact, I didn’t know we would get back together for a short while after. P was great, smart and kind and we had much more similar interests and a real connection. The main issue with P is he doesn’t like unpredictable, crazy girls who are a lot. That’s me. I’m a lot of things he really likes, but not that. And he’s not perfect either. We’ve had a summer fling every year for the past three years and always blocked each other at the end, having annoyed and upset each other. This time though, I said we should just take a break and so we’re still talking.
There’s so much more context but basically I recently started talking to both of them again, D after 1.5 years and P after about 10 months. I’m talking to them over text but P is moving close to me soon.
I really like both, but neither want a relationship with me right now. The problem is, I’m in love with D, who abused me so badly I have PTSD. I’d rather pursue something with P but he thinks I’m too much, too crazy, whereas D is always understanding of my craziness and talks through it with me.
How do I shift my attention away from D and calm down so P could see a future with me?

I am a lot, I’ll start by saying that. I have bpd and I’m an extrovert and I suppose I’m quite weird.
I met this guy D (21 at he time) when I was 19 and we dated for 9 months and I was really in love with him. This was 2 years ago. After we were together like 5 months it got abusive and we broke up for the first time, but it was toxic from the beginning, from both of us. We enabled each other and made each other worse if I’m being honest. But we were also really in love and his personality was so amazing and there were so many things I loved about him.
It ended after a really bad night where he was very violent and I felt my life was in danger. His family, especially his mum, put so so much strain on the relationship because she’s really controlling and didn’t like me.
We didn’t talk for a long time, like 1.5 years.
The first time we broke up I went to stay with my parents for the summer and I met a guy, P (22 at the time). This was about 5 months into my relationship with D, but it was over and we had gone no contact, I didn’t know we would get back together for a short while after. P was great, smart and kind and we had much more similar interests and a real connection. The main issue with P is he doesn’t like unpredictable, crazy girls who are a lot. That’s me. I’m a lot of things he really likes, but not that. And he’s not perfect either. We’ve had a summer fling every year for the past three years and always blocked each other at the end, having annoyed and upset each other. This time though, I said we should just take a break and so we’re still talking.
There’s so much more context but basically I recently started talking to both of them again, D after 1.5 years and P after about 10 months. I’m talking to them over text but P is moving close to me soon.
I really like both, but neither want a relationship with me right now. The problem is, I’m in love with D, who abused me so badly I have PTSD. I’d rather pursue something with P but he thinks I’m too much, too crazy, whereas D is always understanding of my craziness and talks through it with me.
How do I shift my attention away from D and calm down so P could see a future with me?

Yesterday, when taking my old girl Doom (sweetest black lab in the world) to the vetco I was walking around the store nervously looking to get a treat for her. And that's when I saw them. The most polite little ratties I've ever seen. They seemed pretty interested in me, too. My mom was there with me, a fellow rat lover, and she was impressed by how fast we clicked. The only issue is I live with my grandma...who does NOT like rats, which means I'll need to keep them in my bedroom. Hardwood floor, but does have plenty of space for me to put up a nice enclosure. (They'll probably not be restricted to the cage unless I'm at work, asleep, or otherwise can't be with them.)
What should I have prepared for them, apart from like, the big metal frame? I was thinking of getting a buffer for the floor they couldn't chew through and then putting some paper chips down on it, and of course water, hammocks, and toys, but that's all I got so far..
Oh! I also have names for them so far. I want to name any future rats after the female companions from the Castlevania series, that being Sypha, Maria, and Charlotte! (Not Shanoa though because she's the protagonist of her game) Only looking into girls right now as I understand they're a bit easier in general

For some background information, I am 19F Indian student going to my junior year of college. I moved to the United States, Pennsylvania for my college. I’ve been here two years now.
My family, my stepmom, my dad and my stepsister have since also moved to the United States, Chicago last year, one year ago, quoting “they want to be closer to me to help me.”
I’ve believed my family to be abusive, specifically my dad. I have since coming to college, tried to minimize contact with them, to no real avail. They get upset if I don’t call them everyday at least once, if I don’t visit on every break for the full duration of the break.
They have finance everything for me so far. I’ve worked campus jobs and have managed to save almost 7k USD.
My dad has been admitted to the hospital for cancer and has been undergoing treatment since November 2023, last 7 months.
I was forced to fly to help with whatever my they needed for all this time, while also forcing me to fly over to Chicago every other week during my semester for additional help.
For more details: when I say they force me, I mean that my stepmom states everything that is currently going on being stressful, which I’m sure it is, and using that as a reasoning to beat herself up and to not treat herself better until I come visit. I love my stepmom just as much as I do my biological mom and I don’t want to burden her, she also states my stepsister as wanting to see me and missing me as additional reasons for me to visit.
This last time that I intended to visit, I had told my stepmom that I’m visiting for only 10 days as I have an internship during the summer. She lashed out at me, saying that I’m selfish, don’t care about her or my sister and much less, my father. I was upset and had enough and said that I’d no longer be visiting for said 10 days.
After that, my stepmom made a series of calls to me and went back and forth, in which she listed all the sacrifices she and my dad made to pay for my college in the United states. Which made me feel guilty for being mad at them and hence, I flew to Chicago.
Now that I’m back at Chicago, my stepmom brought over my biological mom and my maternal grandmother. She yelled at me for overthinking all the times my father yelled and beat me, saying that it’s normal for an Indian family and that I should be grateful for them supporting me to study in the United States. (Which I am, but I also earned a majority of my college paid for by scholarships. My family can afford to send me to college as they have assets that are worth 2million USD now after they’ve sold a house worth 120k usd to send me to college. They have so far spent a maximum of 60k usd on my college so far)
My biological mother supported these statements and also told me a couple of things that my father did for me.
She also yelled at me for not understanding that my father was only frustrated with his life and that he was never happy about yelling at me or beating me. And further told me to transfer schools so I can form a new social circle who won’t “pollute my mind with stupid ideas like not coming back.”
My stepmom has also said she’ll contribute to the down payment of a car I’m planning to buy as I mentioned it earlier to make me stay with them for longer as “being with family is always a support. You cannot abandon or cut off your family”
I also have a fiance, 19M, that is in the United States and knows about this. My stepmom basically also said that I shouldn’t trust my fiance as he grew up in the United States and only after marriage can I trust anyone.
I just want to be financially independent so I don’t have to put up with my stepmom and my father yelling at me constantly and that I can’t trust my significant other and how they yell at me for talking to anyone but them.
I want to cut them off but it’s trust that it’s more financially beneficial to stay with them and to put up with everything.
What do I do?

So the number one big problem with PD3's armour is that it completely fails to create tension. There's no tension throughout the heist because it's too easy to maintain control over the heist and prevent a premature plate break, and there's no tension from attrition because you can easily stretch your armour to last for way longer than any heist will last. Resulting in fatal boredom. So I tried modding these adjustments:

• All armours' 25% damage reduction is replaced with a 25% damage increase (with the way the game does maths, this is a 66% enemy damage increase)
• Trauma damage reduced from 35% to 13% (equivalent to 22% without the damage increase)
• Recovery time changed to 3/4/5/6 seconds (from standard lining to heavy ballistic)
• Pretend that the Extra Plates and Armour Up skills don't exist so your armour bag can only bring 4 plates
• Downs completely removed. Lose all health and go straight to custody

These changes were a good start. Before you were pretty much forced to wait out every assault and do objectives in breaks, but these changes allowed for an aggressive yet very cautious and tactical playstyle, like playing PD:TH on OVK145/193+. But it was still too easy and boring... until a dozer came up and the difficulty completely spiked.
Now one of the other big problems with PD3's design is in how they did difficulty. Instead of making it harder to do things right, it just punishes you harder for doing things wrong. It's like saying "Here's an insanely hard maths question: What's 2+2? It's difficult because if you get it wrong, you DIE!" Take the tasers, for example. They're too underpowered, so they increased their damage - changing nothing, because it was still super easy as ever to just not get tased in the first place. So, I wanted to address the difficulty gap by making the specials more of a real complication:

• Tasers' and naders' health and armour quadrupled
• Shields' health and armour doubled and their visor made unbreakable and impenetrable (same penetrability as the shield itself, so you can still get through it with the overkill sniper)

Now it's still easy to prevent the tasers and naders from attacking, but since they take so much longer to kill, you have to fall back to safe territory and come out multiple times to kill it to be safe, which really spices things up because that process opens a window where enemies can push or flank you, so now the specials actually have a big indirect impact. The shield change is also very effective at nerfing camping and waiting out assaults (since no other change actually made that any less effective).
I tested this out on Under the Surphaze OVK and oh man this actually put the excitement back in the game. Any extended enemy fire would immediately break a place so I had to clear every corner and slide from cover to cover like a tactical shooter, constantly having to decide whether to push or fall back, and after a tango with a dozer there ended up being a super tense escape with just one plate and a sliver of health left. This was absolutely a big improvement.
I would like to change other balance aspects of the game like the ammo economy, weapon firepower, skills etc. to make 4-player a proper co-operative challenge, but without p2p that isn't happening soooo it's gonna have to work with solo play and busted weapons.
If you want to try it, here is the rebalance mod. You'll need this and this to play offline.

Top 5, from the streets of Toronto, had always tried to live up to his older brother, Foolish. When Foolish was killed, Top 5 took on his persona, chasing clout online to fill the emptiness. He got caught up in wild behavior that eventually landed him in prison for the murder of a 21-year-old student—an innocent guy caught in the crossfire.
Prison was a whole different game. All that bravado he had online? Gone. The inmates saw right through him and quickly put him in his place. Top 5 had to figure out how to survive, leaving his GGG (Go Get Em Gang) family behind and trying to find out who he really was without all the fronting.
Then he met El Presidante, a real killer with a serious rep. El Presidante remembered all the trash Top 5 talked about him online. Their first encounter was brutal. "You think you're funny?" El Presidante growled, pinning him against the wall. "All that stuff you said about me online. You got the guts to say it now?"
Top 5 was shook. El Presidante didn’t just beat him down physically—he took control in ways Top 5 never expected. But something weird happened. What started as fear turned into something else. Top 5 found himself drawn to El Presidante’s presence, craving his attention despite the pain.
Their encounters were intense, a mix of fear, pain, and twisted affection. Top 5 couldn't help but need El Presidante’s touch. Prison life became less harsh with El Presidante around, even if their relationship was all kinds of messed up. Top 5 struggled with the guilt of leaving his gang, but he couldn’t deny the bond he was forming with El Presidante.
Determined to stay close to El Presidante, Top 5 started acting out on Instagram Live via his prison purse IPhone X. He went wild, incriminating himself further with every post, ensuring he’d never leave prison. He even dropped a track from prison, confessing to the murder. The song blew up, securing his place in prison for life and tying him to El Presidante forever.
Their story became a wild tale of unexpected love in the darkest place. Top 5 went from chasing clout to finding a weird kind of solace and redemption with the man who now controlled his world.

I am so sorry for how long this is, but there's quite a bit to cover.
I am a 28F mechanic who works for a rather large dealership in my city. I love my job, I love working on cars, and I love the men that I work with. It's like having an army of brothers that would do anything for me, and I have genuinely never had such a wonderful and supportive workplace environment.
Until "Collin" (26M) started about 6 weeks ago.
Before I start with him, I want to tell you about my "superpower." When I was very, very young, my mother noticed that I had this uncanny ability to detect "bad" people. Even as a toddler, there were certain people I didn't want near me or holding me for seemingly no reason. If they tried, I would scream until they left me alone. If said people tried to pick me up anyway, she'd snatch me away from them and tell them that I said no and to leave me alone. When they'd ask why or push that I "didn't know what [I] wanted," she'd shut them down and say that me not wanting that was reason enough. She's never, ever questioned my "ability" and instead leaned into it and helped me nurture it (especially after certain charges came out about a previous church member that I was uncomfortable around).
Back to Collin. Obviously, that's not his real name, but what is real about him is how... creepy he is. It was evident to me the moment I first met him, but I didn't want to come off as judgemental. My "superpower" has never been wrong, but I have a problem setting boundaries when I'm on the clock because I never want to be the "problem child" for a company. As the only female mechanic, I'm even more aware of that, so I tend to walk on eggshells out of fear of being treated differently.
With Collin, it's a little hard to explain, but to start, he's got personal space issues. As in, I have an issue with how little he respects my personal space. An example: I keep snacks in one of my toolbox drawers for when I and my teammates are too busy to stop and eat a proper lunch. A few days ago, I was bent over and fishing around for a protein bar when I felt him walk up behind me. Of all the angles he could've approached me from, he picked directly behind me and got so close that I felt him brush up against my butt. I immediately shot up and told him to back the fuck up. He tried to play it off as an accident, but I told him, quite loudly, that it's not an accident to sneak up on someone like that and touch them. When he saw a few of my coworkers looking over at us, he quietly made a comment about me overreacting, and walked away.
A few days before that, as I was working on a car, he came up to my toolbox and just took an impact gun. It wasn't mine; I was borrowing someone else's because mine was being repaired. So I stopped him and told him to put it back. He asked me why. This was weird to me because, as far as he knew, it was mine and if I said no, he should've just left it at that. So, I said, "Because it's not yours and I said no. Please put it back." "It's not yours either," is what he said. He tried to walk away with it. At this point, I physically stepped in front of him and said "All the more reason for you not to take it. It isn't mine to lend out. Please put it back." He then asked me if he had a problem sharing. I asked him if he had a problem with respecting boundaries.
Y'all... the look Collin gave me sent chills down my spine. At that moment, he glared at me like my ex did right before he put my head through a wall, and I was actually scared. I swallowed that fear and stood my ground, even though I just wanted to curl up and disappear. He must not be used to people standing up to him because he just sighed in annoyance and slammed the impact down on my bench, then walked away. He, thankfully, avoided me for the rest of the day.
Since those two situations have happened, I've asked for my friend/coworker, "Evan," to make a new group chat for that handful of us that hangout after work because I wasn't comfortable with Collin having access to my phone number. Evan had added him, without asking the rest of us, when they'd gone to a theme park together a few weeks prior. I'd opted out because I didn't want to hang out with Collin, but they used the group chat to communicate plans and such. Evan agreed to make a new group chat so that I feel safer.
Now, finally , the reason I am writing this post is because of what happened yesterday. I may have overreacted? My fiancé thinks I acted well within reason, but sometimes my anxiety makes me believe that I go overboard, even if I'm being perfectly rational. I'm not sure if that's the case here or not.
I caught Collin fishing around in my toolbox. Except, this time, it was the drawer that I keep my purse in. It's not a secret that it's there; every morning when I walk in, my coworkers see me put it in that specific drawer. I used to keep it with the snacks, but the men I work with are a little more old fashioned and won't even go near my purse, so they'd get hesitant when they saw it near the snacks. I moved drawers so they could freely grab food when I was too preoccupied to personally hand them something in order to avoid my purse. It was no bother to do so, but boy did it bother me when I saw Collin huddling over that drawer with my purse in it.
I shouted with my whole chest, "What the fuck do you think you're doing?" He immediately stood up and started mumbling about needing a certain tool, to which I bombarded him with questions like, "And you were just going to take it? That's not even where any of them are! Why were you going through my purse, you creep?" He couldn't keep up to answer any of my questions, but as far as I was concerned, he wouldn't have been able to come up with a good enough excuse because it's quite well known that that's the place where I keep my personal belongings. It got to the point where I was just yelling at him, and other coworkers had to come pull me away from Collin because I was getting increasingly aggressive. I was so mad, in fact, that I didn't even realize that he was getting aggressive too, and the reason why Evan and "Peter" had to pull me away is because Collin was getting in my face and calling me names. When I try to think about it now, I don't remember hearing that. I was so angry, that all I could really hear was the blood pumping in my body.
I had to sign a write up this morning. Absolutely fair, seeing as how I lost my shit and all professionalism in the workplace. I'm annoyed because this is my first write up, but management needs something to prove they "punished" me in some way for my behavior. What I'm not okay with is Collin telling people that I flew off the handle for no reason. Then this guy has the nerve to approach me today and tell me he forgave me for the way I treated him yesterday and that he hopes we can be friends in the future. I might be the asshole because I told him, calmly, that "I never want to be friends with someone who is so apathetic and disrespectful when it comes to boundaries and personal space" and that I'd appreciate it if he left me alone in the future. Now he's moping and saying I didn't even give him a chance before being a bitch to him.
Am I the asshole? Did I overreact?