Hi everyone! This chapter will read a bit quicker due to all of the dialog. As always, comments and upvotes let me know you're still interested in the story.
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Once everyone was aboard the USS Dwight D. Eisenhower, Mira seemed to relax a little. Davis and Thompson were chatting away with Vebi and Fennis. Povin still stayed near Mira when the officers were chatting with each other. She felt a little lost now that her services as translator was no longer needed. The winds were much stronger here, and one of Povin’s wings got caught in the wind, causing him to lift up. He reflexively opened his other wing.
“Povin! Remember! Glide! Do not flap!” Mira yelled at him.
“What was that Chief?” Thompson asked.
“I’m sorry sir. Ensign Povin’s wing got caught on a draft. They come from a lower gravity world so if he tries to fly, our gravity will break most of his wing bones and tear through his wing skin. The atmospheric belts they wear can maintain their own atmospheric conditions, but it can’t keep up if they full on fly.”
After riding the currents and getting used to how it felt under his wings, Povin was eventually able to land. He quickly wrapped his wings about himself tightly to avoid doing that again. The rest of the remaining Drala quickly tightened their own wings about their bodies.
“I see. Let’s get everyone inside.” Admiral Davis replied. “Chief Rodreguez, your Captain Martinelli sent over your uniforms.” He called over a sailor who had a duffle bag which was handed over to Mira.
Mira looked a little closer at one of the Destroyer escorts. “Sir, is that the USS Bainbridge I see?”
“Yes, it is. You think your Captain would allow us to come get you and not be a part of the escort? Once we stopped receiving responses, he has called in almost daily to NASA to get answers. Honestly, I was willing to bet that if we denied his ‘request’ to join the escort, he would have gone rogue to be here.”
“I’m not so sure about that. Captain Martinelli wouldn’t break protocols like that. He might have been hailing like crazy until someone gave him answers, but never would he go rogue.” Mira replied.
As she finished saying that a sailor came up the Admiral, “Sir, Captain Martinelli of the USS Bainbridge is on the horn for you.”
“You were saying, Chief?” Davis chuckled. “Maybe you should go take that call. We’ll be in the Ready Room. Come see us there after you have spoken with your captain and made yourself Navy presentable.”
“Yes, sir!” She saluted, received the return salute, and headed to the comms room. In the comms room, she was directed to the receiver. “This is Chief Mira Rodriguez speaking.”
“Chief. It’s good to hear your voice again. Do you have any idea how many calls I received from my nephew? I don’t know how he was able to get people to patch him through so frequently while on duty himself, but he’s very resourceful. I have to admit that. Did those aliens treat you well? And who took down communications like that?”
“Yes, sir. I was treated extremely well. I haven’t had a chance to be debriefed yet, so I don’t know how much I’m allowed to say over comms.”
“I understand. You should be able to say at least if the comms were interrupted by the aliens.”
“Not by the aliens I was with, sir.”
“I understand. Go do what you have to do, Chief. I hope to see you back on the Bainbridge soon.”
“I hope so too, sir.” She replied. The call ended and a sailor took her to where she could change her clothes as well as where the Ready Room was located. Once she was in her khaki-colored Shipboard Working Uniform, she headed to the Ready Room and then waited to be told she could sit. The Flx’usri each had their specialty chairs, and the Drala were able to manage the human chairs.
“Is Captain Martinelli well?” Admiral Davis asked.
“I believe his is calmer now, Sir. However, I suspect he will grill me himself once I am returned to his ship.”
“That sounds about right, Chief. I wouldn’t expect any less of him.”
“Grill? Are you in danger, Chief Mira?” Vebi asked worriedly.
“Grill is slang for question soundly, Rear Admiral. I promise that I will be completely safe with my Captain.” Mira looked around and noticed Commander Morris wasn’t in the room. “Excuse me, Sirs. What happened to Commander Morris? I thought he had survived the assault?”
“I’m sure he’s somewhere on board the ship. When we left to this room, he had been distracted. You know how these ships can be hard to navigate for non-Navy enlistees.” Davis replied.
General Thompson added, “If I had not spent my earlier enlisted time on board Navy vessels, I likely would have also been confused. I always did enjoy the Marine Taxi Service.” He joked. The Admiral gave him a poke with his elbow good naturedly. It was a sign that they had been friends as well as coworkers for a long time.
Admiral Davis explained to the aliens, “The General and I belong to different branches of service. Each branch has a love-hate relationship with all of the other branches. We all have our strengths, and our weaknesses are proudly backed up by the strengths of the other branches. It’s like having siblings. I can tease and make fun of my siblings, but if anyone else does, I will fight them to submission and make them apologize to my sibling.”
“Ah, I understand,” Vebi replied. “I feel the same way about my spawn-mates.”
Fennis cut in, “I understand the diplomate you had intended for us was lost in the conflict. We would prefer if Chief Mira were to be this for us. She has lived with us, and we have forged mutual respect for each other.”
“I believe that can be arranged.” Davis replied after a few moments of thought. “Bureaucracy takes time, and the rest of the Chief’s enlistment will have to be accounted for, but I believe this can be arranged.” He chuckled. “Captain Martinelli will be both happy for you and pissed we’re taking away his highest-ranking Machinist Mate aboard the Bainbridge.”
They began talking and getting to know each other and finally, Vebi asked, “I understand you will need to speak with others to make a real decision, but do you think your people will join the Federation?”
General Thompson beat Admiral Davis to it as he said, “They touched our boats. No one touches the US Navy’s boats and gets away with it.” Davis gave Thompson a small elbow to the ribs showing that the two men were friends outside of their official responsibilities.
Eventually, Commander Morris found the Ready room and General Thompson gestured for him to take a seat. “Now that we’re all here, Chief, how about you give us a full debriefing. Start from leaving Earth.”
“Yes, Sir. The mission started off great. Roger was able to correct course as needed, but the autopilot we were using was very accurate. We were all asleep when it happened. I’m a light sleeper and the pings against the hull woke me up. Looking back, there must have been a harder hit that woke me up first, but at the time, all I heard was the lighter pings. I got up to take a look around and then the alarms went off that we all knew meant to get into our space suits. Once I was in my suit, I realized no one else was in the room with me.
“I grabbed a suit with the intent to help someone into it and then we could go back and help others. They were all dead. The atmosphere in the ship was completely gone and we were no longer noticeably moving. I was staring at either a short and rough death once my air ran out, or if I could fix the life support, I could be looking at a long agonizing death from hunger. I never turned away from a challenge, so I was determined to fix the ship.
I fixed the life support and power at the same time. Now I was only going to face a long agonizing death. It was then that I jettisoned the dead. Hindsight being 20/20, I realize it was the wrong choice. I know that Commander Morris felt I should be able to make a refrigeration room, but if you look at the ship and the schematics, but assuming that I knew I was going to survive and make it back home, that ship did not have rooms that were airtight. They are close, but do not seal all the way. Secondly, I didn’t have the materials to make it so that the air didn’t circulate out of any room I put them in.
“At that time, I fully expected that I was going to die out there. It would take time for any message to get to Earth, time to fabricate a new ship and crew it, and time to get out to me. Time that I didn’t feel I had.”
Davis interrupted. “The seals weren’t airtight?”
“The exterior ones were, but any of the interior doors were not. They used a different kind of seal material, and in some cases, we could see light through a closed door. Even the door that was supposed to be the airlock for if we had to open the exterior door for anything. That one was the best seal, but there were still leaks.”
“Continue.” Davis said.
“I was out fixing the thruster when the crew of Black Hole found me. You haven’t met them, and I don’t think they can even come down here. The federation uses color outlines on their emblem to denote classes of ability to survive on worlds, I guess would be the best way to put it. Black Hole is a Green Class. They have the fewest worlds they can touch down on and survive. It’s based on allergy. If they were to even touch the plants here, they would get hives. The Meteor's crew is a Black Class. They can go to nearly every inhabited world. They might have to be careful of gravity, or if the air quality or temperatures are too extreme for the atmospheric belts to handle. Our world is classified as a Black Class planet.” She then relayed the rest of her journey.
“Do you think we can speak with these other heads of ships?” Thompson asked the aliens.
“Of course.” Fennis replied. To Vebi he said, “If you hail Commander Xuan’rawis, I’ll hail Captain S’sveta.”
After getting their targets on a video call, they both headed over and got their counterparts in view too. “We still have two hours until our nocturnal counterparts awaken. We’ll have about an hour of overlap, and then we will need to rest ourselves.” S’sveta said.
The leaders all spoke with each other, leaving Morris very confused as he did not receive a translator implant. Thompson told Mira she could act as his translator, so she did.
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“We’re a meat family,” my dad would proudly tell strangers. He’d wait for the quizzical look, then launch into detail, starting with how many freezers we had, how long we could sustain ourselves on the contents. It was just his way of starting a conversation, which made sense when you considered that raising and home-killing animals for food was, for want of a better term, his life-long hobby. His prize possession was one of those industrial-sized vacuum sealers: you could put half a pig inside and wrap it in plastic so tightly that every wrinkle and skin fold waxed unreal with shiny detail.
If we hadn’t lived in a rural area, albeit semi-urbanised, I guess it would have been pretty weird. But the mostly farming-stock locals only found his extra enthusiasm a little bit odd.
When he wasn’t being a bit embarrassing talking about it, I never really paid much heed to his hobby. I had a child’s vaguely grateful awareness that though our family went through some lean financial times, our stomachs never suffered like some of the families around us. All the beef, pork, ham and bacon in those big old chest freezers passed down from his dad really could have fed us for years.
I should preface all this by saying that I wasn’t a particularly bright kid, though neither was I dumb. I didn’t fail badly at anything in school, I just never achieved beyond a pass. I didn’t know it yet back then, still quietly dreaming about being a ballet star or a dressage champion, but mediocrity was my destiny. And I think that’s why I got on so well with my Aunt Liz.
Liz was my dad’s live-in youngest sister. She was one of those women who get described as ‘bubbly’ — not really pretty, not really smart, not a lot going on besides just being… well, all Liz. But she was salt of the earth; kind, caring, and great with kids. She was the only person who would willingly mind my two older brothers, who fought like hellcats and caused more trouble than the whole last generation of my family combined. People would privately lament to my parents that it was a shame Liz didn’t have kids of her own, but dad would just shake his head and say Liz liked it that way – that all the fun of looking after kids is being able to give them back to their parents.
I guess she was like me; nice, but mediocre. Lovely, but somehow forgettable when she wasn’t doing something for you.
But when Liz left us, I couldn’t forget her.
In hindsight, it was pretty weird timing that we had a big fortieth birthday party for Liz right before she disappeared. She was radiant that night; she’d hired a local girl to do her hair and makeup, and it was honestly the first time I’d ever seen her look pretty. She’d even worn a push-up bra under a tight red dress, which flattered her very plump curves well enough that the neighbour’s farmhand was spotted disappearing into the woolshed with her for a snog. In my dawning awareness, that gave a plain girl hope: if Aunty Liz could get a guy at forty, maybe things would turn out okay for me.
Anyway, I couldn’t forget how her pink cheeks, her eyes, her whole self, glowed that night before Liz went to bed. She said it was the best birthday ever, and that she was very much looking forward to the next stage of her life.
Would I have done anything different, if I had known? If I had realised what, exactly, that next stage was?
The week after the party, Aunt Liz said she was going on a little holiday up north, to visit some old school friends. She packed her things – she didn’t honestly have that many – and drove her little orange mini out onto the main road. And with a wave of one fleshy hand, she was gone. Nobody really thought much of it when she didn’t call, because nobody rural had cellphones back then. And Liz was, as I said, somehow kinda forgettable when she wasn’t right in front of you.
When we hadn’t had contact for six weeks, Dad tracked down the land line numbers for their old school buddies. They were surprised to hear from him — Liz had never arrived, so they had just assumed she’d cancelled her visit. No-one had thought to check. I eavesdropped on the conversation, and it sounded for all the world like *they* had forgotten about Aunt Liz, too.
From there it became a missing person case. The local cops came and talked to all of us; the farmhand who’d been seen snogging her was briefly detained, then let go, dad got grilled at length, even my hellion brothers were questioned thoroughly to see if this was one of their wild and dangerous pranks gone wrong.
But everything was a dead end. Nobody knew where Liz was, or what had happened to her.
The remains of her old mini were found halfway across the country, burned out on a beach, on a derelict stretch of ragged, rocky coastline. The police assumed murder and combed the area for remains. But even the most expert divers couldn’t conquer the incredible undertow and fast-shifting seabed of that coastline to look for evidence, so none was forthcoming.
Eventually the cops collectively shrugged and said that there was really nothing more they could do unless more information suddenly came to light. The locals knew nothing, no witnesses had come forward, and the trail was cold. As far as anyone knew, poor aunt Liz had been murdered on some desolate beach, far away from her home.
It didn’t feel fair to me. She’d once mentioned wanting her remains buried on our farm, in the graveyard plot beside grandma and grandad.
So, in my grief, I went into her room to look for something of hers to bury beside them.
Like I said, Liz didn’t have many things. Her room was pretty spartan, and her wardrobe was mostly sensible farm stuff. There was one exception: she, like me, did like to read, and she had a pretty good collection of well-thumbed books. I think it’s the escapism – even the most mediocre girl can lose herself in the plot of some trashy romance novel, imagine there’s still hope of being swept off her feet by that handsome stableboy, his inexplicable yearning for chubby plain girls.
So I set myself the task of going through the books, to find the right one to bury in the graveyard plot.
Most of them were exactly what you’d expect, but some of them were racier than I was used to. I felt various parts of my body flushing and tingling, as I read breathless prose about calloused hands touching the softest flesh of the protagonist. Okay, if I’m honest with myself, I might have got a little *too* invested in my project at that point. But that was also why I persisted going through her entire collection, until I found the ragged paperback from 1970, entitled Tawny Sands. And inside that trashy cardboard romance cover, I discovered not the tale of Tawny Sands, but some carefully hand-cut, stitched-in pages. A handwritten story in my Aunt’s rounded penmanship: Memoirs of a Long Pig.
I read her story twice in a row, utterly gripped.
Aunt Liz was no Stephen King – heck, she wasn’t even the Goosebumps guy – but her story was gripping and compelling, and I couldn’t put it down. Even if I hadn’t known her, I think that would have been true.
The gist of it was that Liz, when she was sixteen, had discovered that our family had a very long history of eating what she described as ‘Long Pork’. It’s an antipodean term, anglicised from the Pacific Islands: human meat.
Like me, young Liz still had some hopes and dreams. In one of her many failed attempts to find a special talent, she’d taken up cooking as a hobby. Naturally, with our family’s overabundance of meat, she’d scoured the freezers in the shed for ingredients: the racks of ribs and stacks of pork chops, butcher-paper wrappings all neatly labelled with the first letter of the name of the animal they came from.
She found familiar meat from Rodney, one of the pigs that had been recently slaughtered, emblazoned with an ‘R’ in her father’s strong, blocky lettering. There were cutlets labelled ‘M’ for Mary, from one of the lambs she’d hand-reared, and ‘F’ for Ferdinand, the steer they’d killed the month before. But she couldn’t explain the many, many curious parcels of meat on one side of the huge freezer, all labelled ‘J’ – at least, not until she took it all out and assembled it as well as she could on the scoured concrete floor of the killing shed. A big, frozen jigsaw puzzle without the box, her best attempt to discover what kind of beast the pieces had come from.
The animal, she quickly realised, was a Long Pig. Her own Aunt Jenny, who had died the month before – just after her fortieth birthday.
Fortunately, or perhaps not, for Liz, her father entered the shed right at that moment and realised his daughter had discovered the family secret. He sat down calmly on the lid of the freezer, and explained to her that this was a long-running family tradition, dating back to at least before his grandfather had been born.
“There are always people in life, Liz,” he’d said, “who won’t really amount to much. They want to be useful, want to be more. They strive and they strive, trying job after job, hobby after hobby, trying to hit on something they’re really good at. Something that makes them special. Those people can waste their whole lives, chasing dreams that never come true. Eventually they die unfulfilled, knowing that all their time has been wasted. That what they leave behind will fade quickly.”
His voice was oddly gentle as he leaned down and patted one of the neatly wrapped cuts of Aunt Jenny, still sitting frozen on the shed floor.
“Your Aunt Jenny was one of those people. So was my Aunt Irene.” He paused to gaze at his daughter, his next words peppered with emphasis. “But you see, my sweet Liz, they did find a purpose in life. They did find a way to be special, and they left this world utterly certain of their gift.” He stood up, stretched his back. “Let me show you.”
Liz waited while my grandad meticulously stacked the meat back into the freezer, all but one J-marked parcel that looked for all the world like a thick venison steak. He took her back to the farmhouse, and reverently unwrapped the deep red, heavily marbled meat to let it thaw. Then he laid it in the family’s ancient, cast-iron pan, basting it with butter and rosemary until a heavenly scent filled the kitchen, and Aunt Liz couldn’t stop her mouth from watering.
“Just try it. Let her show you. You’ll see exactly what I’m talking about.”
Even though she knew it was her aunt, Liz couldn’t stop herself from taking that first bite. There was something transcendent about the smell, overriding her natural revulsion that this was human meat, not one of their farm animals. For the first time, she truly realised it: we’re just another kind of animal. And weren’t her memories of Mary the lamb almost as fond as her memories of Aunt Jenny?
Liz explained then, in her curly handwriting, the explosion of taste that had assaulted her when she tried the steak. It was tender, it was succulent, it was rich beyond imagining. The fats melted on her tongue, lingering somewhere between pork and beef, but oddly neither. The flavour of the meat defied identification; something familiar, yet not.
But one thing she couldn’t deny; it was the most delicious thing she had ever eaten. Tears dripped onto her plate, mingled with the juice, the grease — not grief, but a pure, real, giddy delight.
“You’re tasting your aunt’s love for this family,” my grandad explained. “Her entire life was carefully curated, to eventually make unforgettable moments for us, just like this. This was her way of being special. This was the greatest gift she could possibly bring to our world – and because she realised that, she died with not a single regret. She knew her life had purpose. She was perfectly, completely fulfilled.”
I felt those words. I felt them lodge in my own belly, settling uncomfortably deep. I knew Aunt Liz, probably better than anyone else in the family. I’d seen how fucking happy she’d been on her fortieth, how goddamn fulfilled she was, despite apparently being a *nobody* and achieving *nothing*. Somehow, in the space of a single day, she had gone from being a forgettable background character to becoming the *main character*, immortalising herself in our family’s history with her sacrifice. Quite literally becoming part of all of us, forever.
I went to the killing shed after I finished with the book. I looked inside the freezers.
But there were no vacuum-sealed packages labelled ‘L’, no matter how deep I dug into the frozen stacks of plastic-wrapped flesh. Panicked now, not sure if I wanted to connect all the dots or unconnect them, I tried to think back over the last few months, recall any meals that had been unusually good. A few Sundays ago, we’d had a stew that really hit the spot and left me craving more. And I realised that the family had a really good night that night; my brothers behaved themselves, my parents didn’t fight, and grandma and grandad had been there. Hadn’t they looked far more… expectant than they should have?
I strained my brain, trying to recall if I’d seen the homekill bag on the kitchen bench – if I’d registered what letter it was. I knew it wasn’t an L. I would have remembered if it was an L.
And then it hit me, the memory, the connection, sizzling as if branded with a hot iron.
It had been an ‘E’.
E for Elizabeth. Not for Edward the pig.
I snorted at my own stupidity – of *course* Liz was short for Elizabeth – and as I comprehended my lack of smarts, I felt something give inside me.
I wasn’t clever, and nothing, nothing would ever make me smart. I had no big talents. I wasn’t beautiful, or even cute – and even if I had a million plastic surgeries, it still wouldn’t fulfill me. It wouldn’t be real.
I was a Liz.
I was a Jenny.
I was whoever the first aunt had been, the aunt who had dedicated her life to making her flesh as delicious as possible, who had worked every damn minute to be the best Long Pig she could ever be.
I wondered how many magical family evenings had been spent eating Aunt Jenny. How many glorious, satisfying, memorable dishes had been made out of her.
And… I wanted that. I wanted to finally know I had a *purpose* in life. One so simple, and so easy to achieve.
I wanted what Aunt Liz had.
***
It's my fortieth birthday today and I’m so fucking excited. For the last twenty-four years, I’ve dedicated myself to this moment; I’ve eaten exactly what I needed to, I’ve exercised just enough, but not too much, to maintain that perfect balance of marbling vs tenderness. I’ve relaxed and meditated to keep all those amazing flavours inside of me. I’ve researched all the greatest meats in the world, from prime Angus beef to A5 Wagyu. I really think I may have outdone myself.
I’m having my hair and makeup done at the local salon this afternoon, and I’m going to look so pretty; all prize piggy on show at the fair. I’m even going to have a big red ribbon in my hair, in memory of Aunt Liz.
Maybe there’ll be a cute boy I can snog in the wool shed, maybe there won’t – I don’t really care; because the most important, most certain thing is that I’m going to be the most delicious Long Pig in the history of our entire family.
I’m going to make everyone so damn happy, and I’m just so glad I can share my story with you all, instead of hiding it in a grubby book like poor Aunt Liz.
My only real disappointment? That you won’t get to taste me.
Reader, I have loved, loved my life. My Long Pork will be out of this world: once tasted, never, ever forgotten.

First, a little about me. I'm 5'5ish, 135ish depending on the day, and have dark brown hair that falls part way down my back with brown eyes. My mom is a Crow (Native American) and my dad is Italian so the olive complexion genes are active in my family. I've got a fairly petite/athletic build with a 32B chest and a toned butt. My nipples are dark brown, on the smaller side, and I shave everywhere. I'm a fan of tattoos and have a feather on my foot, flower pieces on my right hip into my lower ribs, left shoulder, and lower back, a small script piece in my left side bra line, a green carebear in my left bikini line and a large dream catcher down my left ribs. If there's a detail I've left out, feel free to ask ;)
What a week. 18 year old me had gone from a dry spell since AIT and graduation to a blow job, facial, and quick hard sex with a married captain at my first duty station. I was falling fast and hard for him. I wanted him to want me. I wanted him to think of me when he thought of being intimate. I wanted to be his release to do everything she wouldn't.
Dustin snapped me this morning, a pic of his obvious buldge greeting my day. "How's my little Private this morning? I wish you were here to help with this"....You have no idea Dustin. Now that the bandaid has been ripped off, I want nothing more than to keep going. I send him a snap back of my semi sheer, black athletic thong, holding it open in the front with the caption "you could drop your load right in here sir". Naughty I know. For some reason, the thought of him filling my underwear with cum is erotic and in the moment, I crave the feel of his warmth between my legs.
"Come by the house on your lunch break and you can have it" I get in reply. Fuck.
I get dressed in my camo uniform with a generic sports bra and the same black athletic thong underneath and try make it through the morning as routinely as possible. Not possible. All I can think of is what I'm willing to do for the married man I'm lusting for and it's got my mind anywhere but at work.
Dustin let's me know he left early for lunch so he's ready whenever I am. The whole drive over, my mind is racing at the prospect of what's about to happen. I knock and find the door open, with Dustin on the couch, laptop open to some semi sexy photos I'd sent to tease him over the last week while he strokes his firm shaft. "Private Hannah reporting as ordered sir" I say as sexily as I can muster in the spur of the moment.
"Private Hannah, you said you'd found a place to hold my cum" completely keeping character.
"Yes sir" I say, stepping around to stand in front of him, undoing my belt and the buttons on my pants, letting them drop to the floor around my ankles.
"Open up then, I'm already close since you decided to be late"
I hold open the front of my black athletic thong, exposing my shaved pubic area for his inspection.
"At least you remembered to shave to start the week" he says and he builds the pace of his stroking and touches the tip of his penis against my smooth skin. In moments I see him start to swell as he nears his release. A thick rope of white cum erupts from his tip and is followed by a second, third, and fourth. My underwear is filled with his thick, warm release and soon its soaked, mixing with my own minor arousal that has built at the situation. As he finishes, I let go of my waistband and allow my cum soaked thong to cling to my lower lips, teasing me with what could have been.
I pull my pants back up and stand breathless in front of eachother. It's been less than 10 minutes since I walked through the door, we've barely spoken and now his cum is dripping down my inner thigh. What has happened? I feel like an incredibly erotic play thing that's been used for a passing moment of pleasure and right then, I know I'm hooked.
"Hannah, I'm sorry if that was too much" Dustin says, coming to the realization that I'm now back in uniform with his cum filling my panties.
I kiss him square on the lips. "Shhhh babe. I wanted this. I want all of you"
"So you really liked that?"
"Dustin that has got to be one of the hottest things I've ever tried. I'm not changing for work"
I sit on his couch in a pool of his release while we chat for the remainder of our lunch hour. When it's time to go, I feel a glob of him drip down my leg. "Can I come spend the night tonight?" I ask, hoping to get my own release after work.
"Sure hun, I just have a few calls to make but it's okay"
I head back to work with a kiss goodbye and the rest of the day I can feel the stickiness between my legs and it keeps me on edge. I run back to my barracks room, take a fast shower, grab a change of clothes for tomorrow, and something special for tonight. I throw on some gym shorts and a hoodie over my sports bra. Coupled with my slides and I'm back across post and find a note on the door "on a call, be quite when you come in"
I come in and quietly shut the door and make my way past Dustin in the livingroom, obviously on a video chat with someone with the screen facing the wall to the garage. I hear a woman's voice say "oh man those walls are paper thin, I think I just heard the neighbors kids come home from school"
Oh shit, he's on with his wife I realize as I tiptoe my way to the master bedroom where I change into my suprise. Naked in his bedroom, I slip into a teal, sheer lace bra with enough underwire support to give me a little cleavage. I pull on a matching set of panties with an intricate sheer lace front and a single thin string between my cheeks in the back. I fold up my sticky cum soaked thong from earlier and walk back into the livingroom.
Dustin does a double take as I come around the corner. He covers this with a coughing fit as his wife asks if he's okay. "Yeah hun just had an itch in my throat" and they continue chatting, her oblivious to the fact that I've just sat down across from him.
I look him square in the eyes as I begin to tease my dark brown nipples through my sheer lace bra. As he tries to hold a conversation, I do everything I can to lightly tease him. I pinch and massage my breasts, softly run a finger between my legs on top of my lacy bottoms. I stand up and start to stretch, bending forward to let my small breasts hang just out of sight of his camera before turning around and bending forward, reaching back to spread my bum and letting the g-string bury itself between my cheeks, barely keeping my other tight hole from view.
I turn back around and unfold the sticky thong he came in earlier and hold it up for him to see the stain his release left on them, right between the legs. I pull my teal lace thong down in the front, and standing right behind his computer, I begin to lightly tease myself with the soft fabric of the back athletic thong, gently massaging my clit, resoaking the nearly dry panties with another round of sexual arousal.
As my arousal grows, I gradually push into my slick entrance and with one finger and then another, the soft athletic fabric of my underwear once again getting soaked as I rub my clit with them, teasing myself with the over stimulating feel against my raw bundle of nerves. I squat down, my face now right behind the computer screen as I squeeze my breast and open my mouth in a silent moan, performing for the man who can't respond.
All of a sudden I stop, ending my tease at the edge of release, not wanting to slip and give away what's going on...and to tease Dustin further. I stand up, place the arousal and cum soaked black thong on the table right behind his laptop and I walk to the kitchen and begin working on dinner with whatever ingredients I can scrounge up in the kitchen. It's such a turn on to do such a normal task in such a small set of lingerie and I secretly hope that Dustin is sneaking peeks at me from across the house.
At long last I feel warm, strong hands wrap around my waist and a kiss finds my cheek. "How's my baby girl, you little tease?"
I blush at the pet name the gentle touch. "I'm almost done, go sit down you silly boy" I say as I start to plate our dinner of chicken and grilled veggies, sauntering into the dining room like a server at one of those lingerie sports bars.
"So you sure know how to put on a show, Hannah" Dustin says as we begin to eat
"I can be anything you want me to be" I say as I begin a speech I'd thought through in my head, telling Dustin that I don't want casual, I want to be the girl he craves, the one who does the things that no one else does, who let's him try the things he's only imagined I'm his wildest sessions alone with himself.
"What do you get out of all of this?" He asks, questioning this step towards commitment.
"I get to explore myself and act out my cravings without having to deal with all the rumors of barracks and searching for guys to feel safe with. I don't want to be your wife. I just want you to forget her when your with me, and I want you to think of me when you choose how to play"
"Well if you're going to explore, we're going to have to push you out of your comfort zone and actually find new places and things to try"
My heart is racing as fantasies flood through my mind. "What do you have in mind?"
"Just play along with different roles and we'll see what happens baby girl"
Baby girl....is this role number one? Does Dustin think that with our 8 year age gap and my petite frame that we could play out what I think he wants to play? I did just tell him that I want to be the one he thinks of.
"Yes daddy"
"Good Girl"
I. Am. Wet.
"So what did you have in mind for dessert baby girl?"
I stand up, clean up, take Dustin by the hand. "These can end up on the floor too" i say motioning to my sheer lingerie.
"Not yet" he replies, guiding me back to the bedroom.
I find myself once again on Dustin's bed, this time guided into the center, onto my hands and knees. With gentle pressure between my shoulder blades, I drop to my elbows, arching my back and exposing my entrances to open view, my modesty preserved only by the thin g-string buried between my cheeks.
Dustin pulls that to the side, bringing my arousal fully into view. I shudder as a soft, wet tongue traces it's way teasingly between my parted lips, beginning at the bundle of nerves aching in my core and ending in the tight wet hole that's been longing to be filled since I started my teasing back at lunch. I moan a soft sigh of want as Dustin licks me again and again, using his thumbs to spread me open before teasing the inner entrance of my now soaked vagina with his oral stimulation.
After a few breathless minutes of almost over the edge teasing with his tongue, Dustin traces his tongue higher. My eyes go wide and my breath catches in my throat as his tongue glides across my other hole. After a brief pause, he repeats his elongated trail of tongue teasing a second and third time, ending on my bum every time.
I moan "Don't stop, daddy" as his tongue lingers on my hole, swirling around my rear entrance as his calloused fingers reach between my legs to tease my clit. I am so close as his tongue makes headway into my hole which is opening up for him at his constant stimulation.
"I'm going to fill you up baby girl" Dustin leans down and whispers in my ear, his tongue momentarily replaced by his thumb pressing further into my bum, slick with his saliva.
"Please daddy" I moan in reply, eager to keep my promise to do everything his wife won't do.
Dustin pulls away completely and reaches into his wife's nightstand. I see him pull out a bottle of lube and a silver plug with a red jeweled heart on the end, still in its packaging, unopened, unplayed with. I know what's coming and why we're playing this out right now.
Dustin removes the plug from its package and holds it tip first up to my lips. I know what he wants without saying a word. I stick out my tongue and lightly tease the cold metal tip, softly swirling circles around it, further and further down until I bob my head down, taking the whole plug in my mouth and closing my lips around the base. I look up at Dustin, the jeweled heart of the plug between my lips and softly moan in anticipation.
He pulls it out of my mouth and I seductively tease the tip one last time. "Wanna stick it in my ass daddy?" I beg as sexily as possible. After a few seconds of fumbling around with the lube bottle, I feel the cold liquid land on my hole, followed by a finger gently probing my already relaxed entrance. A moment later, the finger is replaced by the cold lubed plug and my breath catches in my throat as I stretch around the plug before closing down tightly on the base. Dustin moves my g-string back into place, covering my soaking wet lips and holding the plug firmly in my butt.
I look back at him pleadingly. I know I teased you hard earlier but if you stop now, this is just cruel. "Daddy please" I say breathlessly, not wanting the stimulation to stop while also acutely aware of the fullness inside my rear.
"Please what?"
"Please fuck me daddy"
"You have two options Hannah. You teased me, so this is a tease for you. You can go to bed, right now, right like this, or you can get your punishment and then a reward like a good girl. Bed or a spanking, your choice"
"Spank me Daddy" I beg without a moment's hesitation
smack the sharp crack of Dustin's hand on my bare cheek takes me by suprise and I clench hard on the plug inside my bum. "Oh fuck daddy" I moan in a mix of pain and pleasure. smack smack smack come three more successive blows, landing on alternating cheeks. I moan almost tearfully as my arousal builds to the point that I'm literally ready to beg for release.
"Daddy please fuck me. Do whatever you want just let me cum please"
A firm tug pulls my g-string down to my knees, still on all fours with my face in the pillows. A hard shaft rubs between my lower lips, finds my eager entrance, and in one firm thrust is buried all the way inside me. I cry out, looking back over my shoulder at Dustin who looks like a man possessed with the overwhelming urge to use me for his pleasure, and in that moment, it's all I want as well.
His firm hands grip my hips and I arch my back, throwing myself back against him to meet his own rapid thrusts. My cheeks clap a faster and faster pace as the overwhelming feeling of being completely filled mixes with the intense pleasure of the moment. I'm red faced and breathless, moaning Dustin's name as he continues in an unrelenting pace, thrusting in and out, in and out. At one point he pulls my face out of the pillows, gripping my long dark hair by my ponytail and commands "You're gonna be a good girl and cum for daddy"
He releases my hair but I remain facing forward, head up and moaning through the moment "Yes daddy, oh my fuuuuuuuuuckkkk" comes from my innocent lips as he simultaneously pulls out the buttplug and buries himself all the way inside me as I can feel him swell and begin to release against my cervix.
"That's right daddy, cum inside my pussy" I beg as he thrusts again and again as my inner walls clench down and my own release spills out of me, uncontained as I find one of the strongest orgasms of my life. His thrusts slow and eventually he pulls out, leaving me leaking cum and lube from both my holes.
He returns with a warm towel and begins to clean me off as I sit up, still in my sheer bra, and kiss him firmly on the lips. "That was incredible, daddy" I whisper, my forehead resting against his as he finishes cleaning my sensitive areas.
"Would you like to rinse off?"
I reply yes and he runs us a sensual warm shower, where nothing but gentle washing and a few lingering kisses happens. He's patient as I take extra time under the soothing water and wraps me in a soft towel when I get out.
As we get dressed into comfy pajama shorts and tshirts, I ask "so was I a good girl, daddy?"
"The best. I think we should stick with this role for awhile if you're into it"
After the time I had tonight, I'm more than willing to play along. We discuss some likes and dislikes and limits (nothing that leaves a mark where I'll have to answer questions about it at work), and reagree that none of this is a thing on the few occasions that his wife visits during her internship. And duh, no telling work, that would fuck us both.
We end the night with gentle pillow talk, and he asks if,for the role, I'd be willing to let him help me get dressed in the mornings, helping me pick out bras and undies from a selection of things I'd actually wear to work. I welcome the increased interaction and dedicated time to talk every morning without a second thought, and I fall asleep with his arm wrapped around me from behind, his strong hand under my tshirt, soothingly placed on my bare stomach, just below my belly button and just teasingly far enough into the area covered by a bikini. I'm in heaven.

I looked over Kenji's from the wok book, but that is a three step process (slow braise, low temp roast, high temp roast) and other recipes seem to feel that's overkill.
On the other hand, I'm considering using a similar combination of methods I use for short ribs and roasts, which is a very low temperature oven followed by a blast of high heat - either the broiler or cranking the oven to a high temperature.
Does this seem....good?:

• braise in soy sauce, brown sugar, salt and pepper at around 250 - 300 degrees for half an hour to an hour, depending on how 'done' it seems (I'm going to guess 'done' in this case is 'sort of sad and floppy looking')

-pour out and reduce the braise -- maybe throw ice cubes in so I could separate the fat easier (do I save the fat, use the fat? Seems insane to throw it out).
-glaze the pork belly with 50/50 maple syrup and soy sauce and black pepper.
-Run it under the broiler for 1 minute, then 2 if nec.
-Cover it with scallions and hope it's gorgeous
-Serve with rice and a radish or cucumber based salad. Maybe fattoush (Lebanese salad of fresh vegetables, mint, parsley and sumac). Also making quinoa tabbouleh today but that might be weird with the rice. Or maybe I should have it instead of the rice. But then I wanted the reduced braise for the rice. Or whatever.
Thoughts? There really are an INSANE number of recipes for this. It's not like shakshuka where there is a basic fundamental approach and then you play around. There are people who throw it on the grill, cook it on the stove like bacon, roast it immediately at high heat.....etc....etc...

I am not the OOP. The OOP is u/Throwra_JessComeOn posting in AITAH
Concluded as per OOP
2 updates - Long
Original - 17th April 2024
Update1 - 19th April 2024
Update2 - 13th May 2024
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AITAH For breaking my Number 1 sex rule with a handicapped guy?
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Obviously throwaway, I don’t need anyone here seeing my regular account. Also I’m in the US and English is my first language, any discrepancies are because I suck at typing on my phone.
So TL/DR for the “give me the bare bones, I don’t have all day to read on the shitter” crew: My #1 sex rule since high school has been no sex before the third date. I recently broke that rule with a handicapped guy, and now my childhood best friend is pissed and grossed out because she thinks I have some weird kind of fetish.
Context/full story: I’m a 28f. My childhood best friend we’ll call Jess is also 28f. To put it simply, I don’t think I’m any kind of prude, I just don’t really feel comfortable with casual sex, never have. My best friend knows this and has teased me about it lightly in the past. She’s been in a long term relationship for the last 3 years, I’ve mostly been single while working on my degree and starting my career. Jess lives in another state with her boyfriend, so we don’t hang out much anymore.
So about a month ago I had a first date with a guy I’d been talking to for a bit, thought it was going places, but he gave a WEIRD vibe on the date and I cut and ran early. On my way home I stopped at a local pub, figured I’d have a drink to unwind and people watch till it wore off. (Tipsy driving is still drunk driving IMO.) I get there and it’s pretty packed, Friday night and all, and there was no seating room at the bar. Took my drink and looked around, most of the “restaurant” side of the pub was someone’s birthday party, but there was a small table with a seat open off to the side, with a guy reading a book there. So I say eff it, I’m a social person and what’s the worst thing that happens, he says no? So I ask if I can sit there for a bit, I promise we don’t have to talk or anything.
At this point I feel like I’ve fucked up because this guy up close is the hottest man I have ever seen. But he just smiled at me and gave an enthusiastic “Sure!” A few minutes later of me sipping in silence and he says “I don’t mind talking, if you want to.” (Yeah I want to are you kidding me right now?) We talk for a bit and it turns out Mike (fake name) is 29, just finished his master’s degree in some kind of computer learning field (“I program computers to program computers”) and he’s living on his own for the first time. He apparently stops by the pub after work because he’s right around the corner, and he’s not used to the silence yet after living so long with a half dozen siblings.
We talked for a good two hours, about everything from dating (which he said he’s basically given up on) to hobbies and tastes, and we have a near total eclipse of a venn diagram on this stuff. I eventually sort of blurted out that I don’t know why he’d give up on dating, this is the closest thing I’ve had to a good date in forever. (Shooting my shot obliquely here lol.) He gets kind of an odd look on his face and says “Tell you what, I have to go to the bathroom, but when I come back I’ll ask you out for real.” Weird, but okay?
Then it all clicks, because he doesn’t get up to walk away, he just rolls. In his wheelchair. And I’m thinking “oh my God he wanted to give me a chance to back out of this without making it awkward how cute can this guy BE.” He grinned like crazy when he got back and saw I was still there, and I basically tripped over myself saying something to the effect of “So I’m free all weekend, what did you have in mind?”
Another hour later, we’ve got plans for Saturday, and he told me he has a neuromuscular disorder I can’t remember the name of (my degree isn’t in STEM lol) so his legs work, but the signals from his brain get misinterpreted so he doesn’t have the balance or coordination for walking or standing. The pub starts switching over to the youngerowdier crowd and he asks if I’d like to go back to his place for coffee to continue our conversation.
As you have probably long since realized, I did not get any coffee or conversation till the next morning and I have ZERO regrets. We’ve been dating since and I know it’s still early but I really feel like this might be the one.
Onward to yesterday afternoon, my friend Jess (remember Jess?) is in town, and we go out for coffee to catch up on things. I’m gushing about Mike, but when I get to how we met she just sort of got weird and edgy. I don’t remember any exact words but she essentially said that I must have a fetish for the handicapped since I broke my #1 rule and it’s the best physical relationship I’ve ever been in. Like it’s good for me because he uses a wheelchair, not because the guy puts in effort in bed??? She said I’ve “changed” as a person and left without even saying goodbye. 15 years of friendship and I’ve never seen her like that.
So here I am, asking the most objective people online (haha) if I’m an asshole or weird for being super attracted to a guy who uses a wheelchair and basically putting out immediately.
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Comments
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RefrigeratorHot3859
Firstly, you are allowed to change the rules that you made for yourself. Secondly, I do not get from anything you wrote that you have a “fetish” for the handicapped. Her comments are weird.
Sounds like you need to keep Mike and drop Jess. Good friends will be happy for you, and from what I can gather, that ain’t her.
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dubh_righ
She's got a weird fetish - for super hot guys who are kind, and well spoken, and fuck like a hero. What a weirdo. (sarcasm, in case it's not obvious)

OOP: Okay, yeah this made me laugh for real. Seriously, what a weeeeird fetish I have!

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brelywi
Hey that’s my fetish too! Here I was thinking I was the only one.
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ShottsSeastone
oh fuck that friend. i read this whole thing.

• you have 0 fetish.
• the guy is hot
• the guy is intelligent
• the guy lives on his own
• the guy has his shit together
• THE MAN GAVE YOU THE DOOR TO LEAVE
• Love comes in all shapes and sizes.

OOP: That shit floored me. He's so considerate in so many ways. His stories about his sibs are also hilarious, I can't wait to meet them. We're trying not to rush things just because it all seems so great, but they have a BBQ in May that he'd like me to come to and I am so there. He was raised around a lot of love and it shows.

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Update - 2 days later
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My first ever update! Yay! Uh, so if you were hoping for some terrible drama, I hate to break it to you that I don’t roll like that. No pun intended. So I do have an update on Jess and shit finally makes perfect sense. And I have a slightly NSFW but funny story about Mike, because this guy is just the best, y’all.
Okay, so first, I finally messaged Jess yesterday and said basically “I’m still hurt by what you said, but after 15 years of friendship I’d never forgive musif I didn’t at least ask why you snapped at me like that.” She replied immediately, “I’m so fucking sorry, I didn’t mean any of that, can we have a do over on lunch?” So I agreed cautiously and took a half day to meet with her today.
Turns out that those of you who said she was jealous, and that she might have something else going on, and especially the person who said something might be going on in HER relationship….. gold stars. She’s in town because she’s job hunting, because she’s moving back in with her parents for a while since her relationship ended. Apparently they have been having a ton of small problems adding up, but the biggest one? Sex. The guy she’s been with was apparently never great but it’s gotten to the point where he makes no effort at all for her to enjoy herself and then gets pissed when she isn’t in the mood.
She tried talking with him about it, making suggestions but he told her recently that it’s “emasculating” being given sex advice by a woman. The straw that broke the metaphorical camel’s back, however, was that her boyfriend has always had a thing for Asian women. She’s caucasian, but she does have long black hair. After weeks of fighting over their sex life, he suggested that they spice things up….by her dressing in a kimono and pretending to be Asian. She lost it on him and is absolutely disgusted by the racist fetishism and ended it right then.
So she had allllll of this bottled up and was hoping to talk to me and finally be able to put it down….. and I missed every hint that she had something big to discuss because I was gushing about Mike. So to her it felt like I was just twisting the knife by bragging about how great our sex was. She snapped, and somewhere between what I was saying and what she wanted to talk about some wires got crossed and she said something incredibly dumb.
She left without saying goodbye because she was mortified and ashamed as well as irrationally mad at me. Something to know about Jess, she’s an awful liar and she and I were the co-founders of our high school’s “foot-in-mouth” society, so I do believe her. I told her I forgive her and I’m sorry I didn’t realize she wanted to talk about something bothering her, and she said I was too stupidly nice and have nothing to apologize for, so I think we’ll be okay. For the time being I’m not ready for her and Mike to meet, because I don’t want to make things feel worse, and she agrees. But she’s really really happy for me. Hopefully this is just a funny story we can look back on someday.
So, on to how Mike almost killed me, lol. Last night we were talking about the reddit post and he gets this funny expression that I’m starting to recognize. And he goes “How do we know you don’t have a fetish if we haven’t at least tried it in the chair?” And I’m like “are you serious lol”. He said he’s never attempted it, because (cue tears) he’s never felt so comfortable with a partner before. Well.
His chair has what is essentially like a parking break thing. Or it should, it’s unfortunately broken and apparently getting them fixed is an expensive pain in the ass. He doesn’t use it that often so he hasn’t made it a priority. And there’s this thing called Newton’s third law, you know how every action has an equal and opposite reaction? As it happens, when you’re trying to, ah, get the motion of the ocean going, in a chair with wheels that aren’t locked, there’s a sort of counter motion that starts and fucks it all up. So we were going nowhere fast except for inching along the floor in his bedroom. And laughing at the silliness, which isn’t helping. Eventually he just stops and says “Maybe we can get some of those wooden block things they use to keep little planes from rolling away, like in Indiana Jones you know?”
I absolutely lost it. Like laughing so hard I’m in tears, he’s giggling half at the situation and half at my reaction, and everything just keeps setting me off again. FINALLY I get it under control, doing some deep breathing exercises and shit, and I look at him again. And he pulls the straightest face he can, and says, for the love of god, “Golly. This sure is uncomfortable.” Folks if I had asthma I would have fucking died right there. I laughed so hard I think I pulled a rib. Like wheezing and not even laughing anymore so much as weeping and making this awful “heeeeee” noise when I could catch my breath. While he’s laughing and rubbing my back and saying he’s sorry, he couldn’t resist.
So yeah, confirmed, no fetish here, and this magnificent bastard’s comedic timing might actually kill me.
I doubt I’ll update again, because there’s really nothing I can see needing to share given everything sort of worked out. And in the end, the real assholes were the….friends we made along the way? Idk. Thanks for all the lovely comments on my last post and for coming along with me on this absurd but brief drama in my life, lol.
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Comments
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Rustymarble
Obviously, Jess needs to have a twin with a mother-in-law invade her home with ummm....dog poo...and somehow there's a tree dropping leaves and and a 7 year old brat threw an ummm...apple? And then the cops came and everyone clapps!

OOP: And everyone's phones blow up! Genius, I'll finally go viral and get all those internet dollars I assume people are raking in, LOL
I probably will post an update on this account, but I don't necessarily want to bog down AITAH with my silly shit. I'm so excited and nervous. It's apparently a Mother's Day BBQ! which I didn't know because my parents and I are estranged and I never even seriously thought about having kids before meeting Mike. But apparently it's a lot of people and a lot of food and apparently everyone knows he's bringing me. Also, can I just say FUCK YES about his mom? They apparently have a huge one floor rancher and she just assumed we'd be sleeping together in his old room. Like none of that weird "you aren't married so you get separate rooms" shit. I already adore them and we haven't even met yet.

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Forward-Two3846
I think Mike updates are essential to AITAH 😆. I am so excited for you and I hope you have the time of your life.

OOP: Oh there is one coming. Oh my God his family, lol. I am exhausted already and it's only 1 here, and we have another day of this ahead! They are amazing and he is glowing like a fireball, the side of him when he's with family is so bright I need sunglasses to look at him.

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Update - 1 month later
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Hello again! I was going to post this on my own page but a few people mentioned that they think it’s nice to read on AITAH, so fuck it, here’s the “met Mikes family” update. And it's a doozy, or at least felt like it at the time for a girl who grew up with a small, dysfunctional family.
So first up, you know what people (at least me) don’t think about when dating a guy who’s always sitting? Height. I know he’s taller than me because we cuddle a lot, and he’s taller sitting on the couch, but I didn’t reeeeeeally get it. So we drive up Friday night after work (actually south and west, lol, but to my brain it’s always up) in his vehicle, which is modified to be driven entirely using his hands. Neat, right? He’s a really good driver too. One more green flag. We get to the house, and it’s…. It’s huge you guys, LOL like not a mansion, just kind of a sprawling one floor rancher. Real estate was wild back in the day.
Anyway we get out, and I meet his mom. I’d like to point out I am no slouch, I’m 5’-friggin-7. His mom is TOWERING over me. But she was the nicest lady ever. We go inside and I meet his dad (who funny enough is apparently the only short one in this family) and his youngest sister, who is living there with his one year old niece. She gets up to hug me and SHE IS ALSO REALLY TALL. It’s already a bit late then, so we eat and head to bed, I get to see his cute as shit room from when he was a teenager, and I casually ask “hey, so uh, I don’t know how this works and stuff, but how tall are you?” and Mike is all “I dunno, like a bit over 6’4? Been a while since I checked.” A BIT OVER 6’4. “So, is everyone in your family tall?” “…..kinda?”
We met the Nordic Basketball team he calls a family properly the next day. (Actually they’re Irish, but they’re blond and tall so it conveys the idea better.) The ONLY one of reasonable height, and still taller than me, was his oldest sister, lol.
They are also LOUD. Like not really shouting or anything usually, just, PRESENT. Mike is a lot different around them, but in the cutest way, like he just beams all the time and you can see how happy he is to be home. One of his brothers put him in a headlock and gave him a dang NOOGIE as a greeting, and got elbowed in the side for it, and all of them laughing. And his mom smacked one of his brothers with a rolled up magazine for putting his feet on the table. More laughing. Just… intimidating but in the happiest way imaginable. I’ll admit I was a little shut down for a bit, but Mike kept checking in with me to make sure I was okay, and they were all really nice, so I got into the spirit after a bit.
I mentioned this in another comment, but Mike has a special sports wheelchair he uses for, well, sports. And he and his siblings play basketball. And he is GOOD. Apart from just having a hell of an arm, he’s quick as hell. And this magnificent bastard that I love will absolutely, purposefully, GLEEFULLY run someone’s toes over. He AIMS for it. They all have this yank-back-the-foot maneuver that’s hysterical to watch.
So it was this crazy day of loud people playing and having a blast, nieces and nephews running around, and just noise. My ears are still ringing. The food was catered in advance because his mom “had seven babies, all I make on mother’s day is margaritas.” They also have a pool, it’s a bit chilly still but the pool is HEATED so we actually all got to swim, which was a lot of fun because I got to show off that I too am athletic…. I can do a backwards somersault off a diving board! Yeah. I’m a real catch lol. They at least pretended to be impressed.
We all stayed up late drinking and bitching that it was too overcast to see the aurora (boo) and I had the worst hangover I’ve had in a while on Sunday. We slept in a bit late, and then joined Mike’s family for the BBQ part of the BBQ weekend. His dad can GRILL, people. And he’s fast, food coming off the grill at lightning speed. I asked Mike about it and he laughed and said “there was seven of us to feed. Ever see a nest of baby birds? He had practice.” Which, fair enough.
I don’t have much experience with babies, but I got to hold his youngest niece (the one living at home with his sis until her husband gets back from deployment) and we had a light talk about kids in the future. I told him that I never put much thought into it but if they were going to grow up in a happy home like his and not how I grew up, I’m pretty sure I’d be open to having them with him someday. But later. I need him all to myself for a while first. He seemed really really happy about that, which makes ME feel all goofy and happy. I’m sappy.
We had to drive home Sunday night, but before we went his mom hugged me and said she’s NEVER seen her son like this, and thanked me for taking good care of her baby. And asked if we’d be back for the 4th of July or if we were doing something with my family. And I tried to be all “haaaa no we’ll be here if you don’t mind, I don’t see them much” and I think she caught on that there’s more to the story so she just hugged the shit out of me (vikings, all of them I swear) and told me she can’t wait to see me again.
My ears are still ringing from all the noise and chaos, but it was an absolute blast and I can’t wait to see them again in July. Also, pretty much sure Mike is the man I’m going to marry. I literally can’t think of a single reason why I would ever let him get away.
Anyway thanks for reading, hope you all had a lovely weekend, and those of you who got to see the aurora I’m happy for you but you suck, lol.
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Comments
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ERVetSurgeon
NTA. sounds like you have found a happy family to join. Good for you and good for Mike.

OOP: It's still pretty surreal. The other in laws that were there were all like that smiling hanging guy meme, "First time?" It was a great weekend.

Stormy8888
This story is so heart warming it belongs on BestofRedditorUpdates.
Congratulations, at some parts I felt like I was reading about the Roarke Family's dynamics in one of Nora Robert's JD Robb's Eve Dallas Novels, the whole Irish family vibes were just there. So lovely.

OOP: Ahahaha I don't think it's interesting enough for that, but I am glad people are enjoying it.

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I am not the OOP. Please do not harass the OOP. Please remember the No Brigading Rule and to be civil in the comments

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Farm Boy

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• Mini cucumbers: $5.00 for 2/6-packs - Same great price on mini cucumbers as before!
• Canadian Fiddleheads (fresh daily): $5.99/lb - This is a cool find! Fiddleheads are a fun seasonal item, so why not try them out?
• Hothouse tomatoes: $1.49/lb - This is a good price for hothouse tomatoes!
• Eggplant: $1.49/lb - This is a fantastic price for eggplant! Usually, it's closer to $2 a pound or more.
• Zucchini: $1.49/lb - This is a good price for zucchini! You might find it cheaper, but it'll take some effort.
• Green onion: $0.77 per bunch - This is a great price for green onions! It's almost surprising to see them under a dollar.
• Blueberries: $2.99 full pint (473g) - This is a fantastic deal on blueberries! Definitely worth picking some up.

Food Basics

• Ground chicken (lean, Zabiha): $3.88 450g/pack - This is a great price for lean ground chicken!
• Fresh 100% Quarter Pound (¼ lb) Lean Ground Beef Burgers: $4.00/4-pack: These beef burger patties work out to $4 per pound, which is a good deal! Especially considering the buns are also on sale. This is basically $10 for 8 delicious homemade burgers!
• Asparagus: $1.98/lb - This is an excellent price on asparagus! Especially since it's priced by the pound, not by the smaller bunches.
• Sweet peppers: $2.98/4-pack - This is a nice price for sweet peppers!
• Sweet potato and sweet purple potato: $1.28/lb - This is a fair price for sweet potatoes. It's neat that the purple sweet potatoes are included in the same deal.
• Coleslaw kit (Green Giant): $5.00 for 2 340g kits - This is a great price for coleslaw salad kits!
• Mini potatoes: $2.98 5lb/bag - This is a good price for a 5lb bag of mini potatoes!
• Strawberries: $1.67 454g/shell - This is an amazing deal on strawberries! Here's hoping they taste great too!
• Cherries: $5.98/lb - This is a decent price for cherries. The commenter recommends making homemade yogurt popsicles with them, although they do admit it's a bit of work to pit them.
• Brick cheese (Selection): $4.44 400g/bar - This is a nice price on brick cheese! Under $5 for a whole bar!
• BBQ Sauce and Mustard (Selection): $1.00/each - This is a nice find! Especially if you're planning on making burgers this week, stocking up on condiments at this price is a good idea.

Freshco (price matcher)

• Frozen burgers (Compliments): $9.99 1.13kg box (8-pack) - While this comes out to about $3/lb for beef, it's important to remember these are frozen, processed burgers. They contain ingredients like bread crumbs and flour, and have a higher saturated fat content than fresh patties. Read the label and make an informed choice!
• Wild-caught Argentinian shrimp (23-30ct): $6.99 300g/bag - This is a good price for wild-caught Argentinian shrimp!
• Sweet peppers: $2.99/4-pack - Another great deal on sweet peppers!
• Mushrooms: $2.99 454g/shell - This is a fantastic price on mushrooms! Stock up while they're on sale.
• Green beans: $1.99/lb - Awesome price for green beans, just like last week!
• Royal Gala apples: $1.49/lb - This is a good price for Royal Gala apples, but you might be able to find them even cheaper if you wait for a sale.
• Blueberries: $2.49/full pint - Another fantastic sale on blueberries!

No Frills (price matcher)

• Beef burgers (No Name): $9.99 1.36kg/12-pack - These frozen burgers are similar to the Compliments brand we saw earlier, but they're smaller and have more sugar and weird ingredients like "onion extract" and "corn syrup solids" than the Compliments ones. They also don't mention the saturated fat content.
• Fresh Chicken Drumsticks: $1.87/lb - This is a fantastic price on fresh chicken drumsticks! At only $1.87 per pound, it's a great time to grab some for your favorite recipes.
• Ground chicken or turkey: $8.00 870g/pack - This is a decent price for ground chicken or turkey, at about $4.20 per pound.
• Ground beef (lean): $6.00 450g/tube - This isn't a great price for ground beef since it comes in a tube.
• Steelhead trout fillet: $9.99/lb - This is the standard price for steelhead trout.
• Asparagus: $2.99/lb - This is an okay price for asparagus, but No Frills sometimes has better deals.
• Green beans: $2.99/lb - Same with the green beans, No Frills has offered lower prices in the past.
• Cucumber: $0.99/each - This is a good price for cucumbers.
• Mini-cucumber: $3.99 11-pack - This is a fair price
• Watermelon (9lb average): $2.99/each - This is a good price for a watermelon.
• Ataulfo mangoes: $5.64 5lb/case - This is a good deal on Ataulfo mangoes, which should come out to about 8 mangoes.
• Pineapple: $2.99/each - This is a good price for a pineapple.
• Brick cheese (Armstrong): $5.49 400g/bar - The price of cheese seems to be going up a bit everywhere.
• Black Diamond Cheese Slices, 22 Slices, 410 g: $2.49 - Save 36% - $3.88 at Walmart.
• Dry pasta (Italpasta): $1.25 750g/packs - This is a good price for dry pasta. Stock up if you're planning on making a pasta salad.

Real Canadian Superstore (price matcher)

• Beef rib-steak (ungraded): $7.88/lb - Not the best deal. You're paying graded prices for ungraded meat.
• Golden Pompano (frozen): $2.88/lb - This seems to be a store-specific deal. Has anyone tried this fish before?
• Dressed Tilapia (frozen): $2.88/lb - This means the frozen tilapia comes with the tail and fins already removed.
• Potatoes: $5.50 10lb/bag - This is a great deal on a big bag of potatoes!
• Corn: $0.40/ear - This is an incredible price on corn! It might even be a loss-leader for the store, so stock up if you can.
• Watermelon (11lb average): $3.99/each - This is a good price for a large watermelon.
• Pineapple: $3.00/each - This is a good price for a pineapple.

Sobeys

• Chicken thighs (boneless skinless): $5.99/lb - This is an okay price for boneless, skinless chicken thighs, but there might be better deals out there this week.
• Beef striploin steaks (AA): $8.77/lb - Scene Member Price - This price is only available to Scene members.
• Beef sirloin tip roast or marinating steaks (AAA): $8.99/lb - This is a tough call. Sirloin tip is leaner but might be less tender than the striploin. The higher AAA grade might make it more tender though. It depends what you're looking for.
• Lobster (live): $10.99/lb - Scene Member Price - This is a good price on live lobster, but only for Scene members.
• Asparagus: $2.44/lb - Good price! This is a good price on asparagus!
• Green beans: $2.67/lb - Good price! This is a good price on green beans!
• Bok choy: $0.99/lb - Amazing price. I don't get how other places charge $2/lb+ for choy, and then you have Sobeys of all stores swooping in to steal the show! This is an incredible price on bok choy! Sobey's is undercutting the competition with this amazing deal.
• Asian pears: $0.99/lb - Awesome price! This is a great price on Asian pears!
• Brick cheese (Cracker Barrel): $5.77 400g/bar - This Cracker Barrel brick cheese seems a bit pricey compared to other options.

Walmart

• Ground beef (lean): $3.97/lb - This is a fantastic price for lean ground beef! Time to fire up the grill and make some delicious burgers!
• Asparagus: $2.97/lb - This is a fair price for asparagus. It's not the biggest discount, but it's still a good option if you're looking for some.
• Corn: $0.32/ear - This is the best deal on corn this week! At only 32 cents an ear, you can't beat this price.
• Potatoes: $4.97 10 lb/bag - This is a good price for a big bag of potatoes. Stock up on your favorite starchy side dish!
• Coleslaw kit: $2.77 397g/kit - This is a good price for a decent-sized coleslaw kit. Perfect for a quick and easy side dish.
• Strawberries: $1.84 454g/shell - This is an amazing price on strawberries! Stock up while they're this cheap.
• Pineapple: $3.97/each - This isn't a bad price for pineapple. Remember, pineapples take a long time to grow, so appreciate the good deals when you see them!
• Brick cheese (Armstrong): $4.94 400g/bar - Another sale on Armstrong brick cheese for around $5!

Costco

• Gain Cold Water Liquid Laundry Detergent with Oxi: $17.49 - Save $3.80
  
• Finish Quantum Ultimate Plus Dishwasher Detergent Pack of 96 tablets: $17.99 - Save $6.00
  
• Ecos Earth Friendly Liquid Laundry 225 Washloads : 16.99 - Save $5
  
• Purex Cold Water Ultra Concentrated Laundry Detergent 250 wash loads : 17.49 - Save $4.50
  
• Cashmere Premium 2-ply Bathroom Tissue 40-pack: 19.99 - Save $5
  
• Cascade Power Clean Dishwasher Detergent 115 ActionPacs : 18.49 - Save $4.50
  
• Finish Quantum Jet-Dry Ultra Rinse Agent 315 washes : $9.99 - Save $4.50
  
• OxiClean Max Efficiency Stain Remover 275 loads : $16.99 - Save $5.50
  
• Dawn Ultra Platinum Advanced Power Dishwashing Liquid 2.66 L : $10.99 - Save $3.00
  

P.S. Let me know if you find any other amazing deals at Costco – always happy to share the savings!
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Reference: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1RJ5pfn7QZOA8YTP-TxjcjSwQI4Bd6OghyF9igf_1Xtw/edit?usp=sharing

(As always, flyers are out Wednesdays, most store sales for the new flyer start on Thursdays)
Adonis

• Crab section (thawed) - $7.77 per lb -- Interesting! Could be fun for making neat meals!
• Coho salmon fillet - $7.77 per lb -- Wow! That's a great price for salmon!
• Sea bass (fresh, free cleaning) - $7.99 per lb -- Fair price for fresh fish.
• Basa filet (thawed) - $4.99 per lb -- Nice! It's not fresh filet, but it's a good price,.
• Chicken thighs (boneless skinless) - $5.99 per lb -- Not amazing, but ok for boneless chicken.
• Grain-fed veal blade roast - $5.99 per lb -- Interesting! It's a more tender cut, more delicate flavour, which might be nice!
• Beef eye of round - $6.99 per lb -- Good and fair price for eye of round. It's possible to find it for less, but it's a hunt. This is a regular Adonis deal.
• Rib-eye steak - $17.99 per lb -- Makes me think of a post I saw this week of a standard prime rib roast in Calgary sold at $55/kg, 27/lb or something. Which is crazy!
• Red greenhouse tomatoes - $0.99 per lb -- Awesome! Great price for tomatoes, but I found the other produce prices advertised were a little lackluster.
• Apricots (fresh) - $4.99 per lb -- Low-ish price for fresh apricots.
• Brick cheese (Cracker Barrel) - $5.77 400g bar -- Not under $5, but still worth snagging a bar if it means skipping a trip elsewhere.
• Cheese Counter - Canadian feta - $1.99 per 100g -- Nice! $2/100g for feta is good.
• Cheese Counter - Tuma - $2.29 per 100g -- Interesting! "Tuma cheese is renowned for its delicate mild milk flavour, and its smooth, velvety and firm texture."
• Cheese Counter - Akawi - $2.29 per 100g -- Ahh, this is a lovely cheese. Not cheap, but it's good stuff!
• Cheese Counter - Fior de latte - $2.29 per 100g -- Good price. This is the stuff you need for a Caprese salad!
• Pâté (Bretagne) - $5.00 for 2 150g packs -- Great price! These regularly go for $4 or so.
• Deli - Chicken breast (Solmaz) - $1.79 per 100g -- Nice!
• Deli - Smoked ham (Olymel) - $1.49 per 100g -- Excellent!
• Deli - Turkey breast (Alzahraa) - $1.49 per 100g -- More great deli!
• Deli - Prosciutto (Negroni) - $2.79 per 100g -- Ah! Nice! Different brand, same great prosciutto price!
• Walnuts and mixed nuts (Cedar) - $4.99 454g bag -- Nice! That's cheap!
• Almonds (Cedar) - $5.99 454g bag -- Good price for almonds!
• Pistachios (roasted, salted, Cedar) - $12.99 454g bag -- Pistachio prices are a little funny. $10/lb is really the price to aim for, but this isn't far off. And it's not uncommon to see 200-250g bags for $7-8 or more.
• Produce Price Rating: Medium, but always has well-priced chicken, the deli meat sale rotations are always fantastic, and just the overall variety of goods is refreshing. Personal favourite store.

Farm Boy

• Chicken breast (boneless skinless) - $5.99 per lb -- Fair price for chicken breast.
• Wild-caught Argentinian shrimp (23-30ct) - $7.99 340g bag -- This is a good rate on decent shrimp!
• Fresh sausage deal - $5.99 500g packs -- Nice little sausage deal here. Fresh sausage avoids the preservatives!
• Mini cucumbers - $5.00 for 2 6-packs -- Good price for mini cucumber.
• Fiddleheads (fresh daily) - $5.99 per lb -- Neat! These are fun to see on the shelf. Try a fun seasonal item!
• Hothouse tomatoes - $1.49 per lb -- Good price for tomatoes!
• Eggplant - $1.49 per lb -- Great price for eggplant! Often $2/lb or more!
• Zucchini - $1.49 per lb -- Good price zucch! You can find them for less, but you'll have to hunt for it.
• Green onion - $0.77 per bunch -- Nice! It's crazy to be happy about green onions for under $1…
• Blueberries - $2.99 full pint -- Ad is for 473g pints. This is a great deal! Worth snagging some!
• Produce Price Rating: High

Farmers Pick (can be a little late on their flyer) (https://www.farmerspick.ca/flyer-specials)
Food Basics

• Ground chicken (lean, Zabiha) - $3.88 450g pack -- Great price for ground chicken!
• Pork side rib - $2.98 per lb -- Good price for pork rib!
• Pork tenderloin - $2.98 per lb -- Great price for tenderloin. More often found for $4/lb.
• Fresh beef burger patties - $4.00 4-pack -- These are 1/4lb patties, meaning we're clocking in at $4/lb, which is honestly pretty good! Season them up and grill! There's also Selection 8-pack of buns on sale for 1.77. So, that's basically $10 for 8 burgers. That's value!
• Asparagus - $1.98 per lb -- Excllent! This is a great price! And it's not even the 340g bunches, no, this is per lb!
• Sweet peppers - $2.98 4-pack -- Nice!
• Sweet potato and sweet purple potato - $1.28 per lb -- Fair price for sweet potatoes. It's fun to see purple ones get lumped into the same bracket.
• Coleslaw kit (Green Giant) - $5.00 for 2 340g kits -- Great price for salad kits.
• Mini potatoes - $2.98 5lb bag -- Good price for mini potatoes!
• Strawberries - $1.67 454g shell -- WOW! Cross our fingers they're nice AND cheap!
• Cherries - $5.98 per lb -- Decent price for cherries. I like making homemade yogurt popsicles with fresh cherries. Bit if a pain in the ass to pit, but so worth it.
• Brick cheese (Selection) - $4.44 400g bar -- Nice! Sub-$5 bricks!
• Salametti (Matro) - $6.49 300g chubs -- May include other varieties
• Baby genoa (Mastro) - $8.99 600g chub? -- Hard to read the ad, but this is a good deal for a big chub of genoa!
• Mortadella (San Daniele) - $8.99 750g chub -- Works out to $1.20/100g, which is a substantial savings compared to the deli counter or buying it presliced and packed!
• BBQ Sauce and Mustard (Selection) - $1.00 each -- Nice! I personally love mustard and a good BBQ sauce. Might be nice to stock up for that burger night!
• Chips (Irresistibles) - $1.00 150g bag -- I usually don't point out chips and seed-oil-snacks, but this is a great deal!
• Produce Price Rating: Low to medium low

FoodLand

• Beef top sirloin steaks (AAA) - $7.99 per lb -- Great price for AAA steaks. Top sirloin isn't the best place to get a steak cut, but it could be fine. Have a look in-store and judge for yourself.
• Shrimp (31-40ct, Compliments) - $6.99 per lb -- Good price for shrimp, but note that these are small.
• Bar scallops (80-120ct, Compliments) - $6.99 per lb -- These are quite small, but they could be interesting to thaw, pat dry, and sear quick on high heat for use in salads. Or perhaps as a top to a risotto?
• Cucumber - $0.99 each -- Scene Member Price.
• Corn - $5.00 for 5 years -- $1 an ear!?!#@! Are they mad?! Do they not watch the news about boycotts and how consumers are pissed? And then you're going to charge them $1 for an ear of corn? My goodness…
• Produce Price Rating: Medium-high to high.

Freshco (price matcher)

• Bacon (Schneider's) - $3.99 375g pack -- Good price for brandname bacon. Sale also extends to some of their wieners and bologna.
• Frozen burgers (Compliments) - $9.99 1.13kg box (8-pack) -- This stretches us down into a $3/lb mark for beef. Which is pretty good all things considered, but know it's a processed meat. Read the ingredients: beef, water, bread crumb, soya flour, and salt and seasoning. You're paying for recovered meat mixed with bread crumb and flour. And the nutritional info on the pack reads 73% daily value of sat-fat in one 142g burger. A 152g fresh patty lands you at 60%. Know your food!
• Wild-caught Argentinian shrimp (23-30ct) - $6.99 300g bag -- This is a good rate on decent shrimp!
• Sweet peppers - $2.99 4-pack -- Nice!
• Mushrooms - $2.99 454g shell -- Great price!
• Green beans - $1.99 per lb -- Awesome price for green beans!
• Royal Gala apples - $1.49 per lb -- Good price for a nice apple variety. However, you can also sometimes score these for $1/lb if you wait and dig around for the sale.
• Blueberries - $2.49 full pint -- Nice! Another great blueberry sale!
• Produce Price Rating: Low to medium low (more on the medium side)

Giant Tiger (*note the VIP prices; sales begin today) (price matcher)

• Hotdog wieners (Olymel) - $2.47 375g 5-pack -- Sigh… Good price for wieners, but still… Don't overdo it. These are categorically terrible for you!
• Ambrosia apples - $2.88 3lb bag -- Great deal on a tasty apple variety that hits that $1/lb mark!
• Blueberries - $2.88 full pint -- Man! So many blueberry deals! Where are these coming from?!
• Romaine lettuce - $2.88 3-pack -- Nice! Fair price for romaine hearts.
• Baby spinach - $1.97 140g bin -- Good price for 140g. The prices of these bins are the weights are all over the place. Some places charge $4 for the same bin. And then some others charge $4 for 300g bins. Treat carefully!
• Canned tomatoes (Primo) - $3.00 for 2 796ml cans -- Good price for nice tomatoes. Funny enough, in this week's flyer, they advertise the Great Value (housebrand) tomatoes for 1.77 being 50c, but if you buy two Primo cans they work out to 50c less than the Great Value (confused yet? Lol)
• Fireworks - various -- LOL I just wanted to mention they got fireworks and firecrackers hahaha
• Produce Price Rating: Generally on the low side.

Green Fresh Supermarket (Vanier) (check https://greenfreshottawa20.wixsite.com/greenfreshottawa)

• Produce Price Rating: Usually very competitive, catering to Asian cuisine. Warning: their newest sales start on Fridays - so this is a late advertising of their sales.

IGA (price matcher)

• Hotdog wieners (Lafleur) - $5.00 for 2 packs 375-450g -- More hot dog prices for our analysis. I'm noting these to get a sense of what the heck is going on with these….
• Lobster (cooked or live) - $7.75 per lb -- Scene Member Price. 9.75/lb regular. Awesome deal!
• Tomahawk steak - $13.99 per lb -- That's pretty good for a fancy steak cut. I like thick cut steak because you can get that and crust without overcooking the meat. Pro tip: always salt and set your steak uncovered to dry in the fridge. That's what gets you a top-notch crust!
• Veal loin rack - $13.99 per lb -- This is more interesting than a value proposition. Expect a decent-sized rack to run you a pretty penny, but it should cook nicely. Remember to let it rest after it reaches the desired internal temp. Be patient!
• Whole chicken (fresh) - $1.99 per lb -- Great price!!
• Eggs (Nutri, Burnbrae) - $5.79 18-pack -- Not a ground-breaker price. Maybe it's just nice see some price stability in egg prices.
• Corn - $4.00 for 10 ears -- Excellent deal at 40c an ear!
• Cherries - $4.99 per lb -- Awesome!!! Cherries can easily reach into the $8-9/lb range.
• Bologna (Lesters) - $5.49 675g chub -- This is a good price for a chub. It's not fancy deli, but it beats the prices by 2-3x or more given you're paying 81c/100g.
• Deli - Cooked ham (Olymel) - $1.99 per 100g -- Speaking of deli prices, consider this unholy monolith slab of ham versus that slice-it-yourself bologna. This "hamalgum sibling" is 2.5x the price of the bologna by Lesters… Just saying…
• Produce Price Rating: Medium

Independent

• Pork back rib - $3.99 per lb -- Meh price for pork rib… $3/lb is good, but $4/lb doesn't seem worth it when it's largely bone anyway! I'd rather buy the duck they have for $4/lb….
• Atlantic salmon - $9.99 per lb -- Average price for pink fish.
• Beef striploin steaks (AA) - $7.88 per lb -- Good enough price for steaks, but FoodLand had AAA grade for the same price.
• Duck (fresh, grade A) - $3.99 per lb -- Good rate for duck.
• Asparagus - $2.99 per lb -- Meh rate. There's better.
• Strawberries - $2.49 454g shell -- Good price for strawberries.
• Butter (Lactantia) - $5.99 454g bar -- Sigh… I wish butter would come down in price…
• Produce Price Rating: fairly high with few exceptions

Loblaws

• Pork back rib - $3.99 per lb -- Meh price for pork rib… $3/lb is good, but $4/lb doesn't seem worth it when it's largely bone anyway! I'd rather buy the duck they have for $4/lb….
• Atlantic salmon - $9.99 per lb -- Average price for pink fish.
• Beef striploin steaks (AA) - $8.88 per lb -- Ben là là! Same AA steak, $1/lb more…
• Beef boneless blade roast (AA) - $8.99 per lb -- Ok price for beef… It's kind of meh… Consider visiting local butchers to see what they have going on.
• Duck (fresh, grade A) - $3.99 per lb -- Good rate for duck.
• Sweet potatoes - $3.99 5lb bag -- Great price for sweet potatoes
• Mini-cucumbers - $1.99 6-pack -- "Save $2". Ya, we know Loblaws. I've been saving $2 on these packs for months now at other stores.
• Blueberries - $1.99 full pint -- Great price for blueberries!
• Mango - $0.99 each -- Fair price for mango considering I've seen Loblaws charge much more for them. Also, I expect we'll see some nice sub-$1 deals in the future.
• Butter (Lactantia) - $5.99 454g bar -- More $6 butter.
• Produce Price Rating: fairly high with few exceptions

Provigo

• Pork chops - $2.49 per lb -- Good price for pork chops.
• Chicken breast and thighs (boneless skinless) - $4.99 per lb -- Good price chicken.
• Atlantic salmon - $8.99 per lb -- Good price for pink fish.
• Corn - $5.00 4-pack -- What?! How can we have these disparities… Maxi has theirs for 33c an ear. That's $1.30 versus $5 for 4 ears… Insane difference in price…
• Watermelon (9lb average) - $3.88 each -- Nice price for watermelon.
• Mango - $0.99 each -- That $1 deal again. "Save $2". Meaning regular price was $3. Insanity.
• Deli - Mock chicken (Gaspésien) - $1.29 per 100g -- Good price for deli, but it's mock chicken. I would refer back to the IGA deal on Lesters bologna. Buy whole chubs, slice it yourself, and save.
• Produce Price Rating: fairly high with few exceptions

Maxi (price matcher)

• Ground beef (medum) - $8.88 1.1kg -- About 2.5lb of beef, which clocks this in at about 3.50/lb. That's pretty good!
• Corn - $0.33 per ear -- Awesome price for corn! It's crazy. Provigo had their 4-packs for $5. Which
• Mini-cucumbers - $0.88 6-pack -- Very nice! A regular "good deal" is $2.
• Coleslaw kit (Florette) - $1.88 340g kit -- Great deal for a salad kit.
• Potatoes (Imperfect) - $4.88 15lb bag -- Excellent!!
• Mini-carrots - $4.88 2lb bag -- This is a good deal given a 2/3lb bag can be $2-3.
• Watermelon - $2.88 each -- Nice price for watermelon, but no weight advertised.
• Kiwis - $4.88 600g pack -- Pretty good. Can be as low as $4, but this is a fair price.
• Apples (Cortland, Empire) - $5.88 4lb bag -- Ok price for what should be over-winter apples. Mind the bruising.
• Fancy cheese deal - $18.00 for 3 -- Check the flyer and in-store for more details.
• Sriracha (Flying Goose) - $3.88 730ml bottle -- Nice! It's a different brand, but the price is right. I wonder what the difference is.
• Silk plant bev - $6.88 for 2 1.75-1.89L jugs -- Good deal.
• White vinegar - $2.88 for 2 4L jugs -- This might be good to get in advance of some pickling plans.
• Produce Price Rating: Generally medium low pricing! This store can post some impressive deals at times.

Metro

• Pork back rib - $2.99 per lb -- Good price for pork rib. It's that magical $3/lb mark. It's hard to find rib for less. And, I wouldn't pay over $3/lb.
• Beef top sirloin steak or roast (AAA) - $6.88 per lb -- Great price for AAA grade beef! They also have "platinum angus medallions" for 8.88/lb.
• Fresh sausage - $4.99 per lb -- Great price for fresh sausage. You can spend $1/lb more and get organic stuff by Dubreton.
• Cucumber - $0.77 each -- Awesome!!!
• Cauliflower - $2.99 each -- Decent. Not amazing, but decent given a head can go for $4-5 easily.
• Portabella mushrooms (Belle Grove) - $6.99 4-pack -- Hmm, I'll have to keep an eye out for prices on portabellas. This doesn't seem that bad off the hop. I know sometimes you can get 4-6 packs for about $4-5, though. But, you have to hunt around town for deals like that.
• Blueberries - $1.99 full pint -- Great price for blueberries!
• Cherries - $5.99 per lb -- Nice! Fair sale price for cherries!
• Watermelon (15lb average) - $9.99 each -- Trying to make sense of these watermelon prices. This isn't as good as some other deals. But considering on the same page they advertise 1.49/lb for sliced watermelon, it suggests this watermelon could cost you up to $22.
• Butter (Selection) - $4.88 454g bar -- $5 butter.
• Produce Price Rating: High. Kinda like Sobeys. You can see a 50% average mark-up compared to a lot of other stores. It's nice produce, but it costs you.

No Frills (price matcher)

• Beef burgers (No Name) - $9.99 1.36kg 12-pack -- Just more frozen burger musing. Basically much like the Compliments ones we saw earlier, but 113g each, but with more sugars and funny ingredients, and the same amount of sat-fat! (And they skip mentioning that 75%-ish daily value number for the sat-fat). Like, what the heck are "onion extract" and "corn syrup solids". Do they squeeze the onion and throw away the rind? And isn't solid syrup just solid sugar? lol....
• T-bone/Wing steak - $6.99 per lb -- This might seem like a good deal, but it's ungraded beef. Why pay this price when metro has AAA-grade steaks for a smidge less?
• Picnic pork shoulder - $2.44 per lb -- Excellent price! These are AWESOME for smoking and braising for pulled pork!
• Ground chicken or turkey - $8.00 870g pack -- Not bad. Works out to about $4.20/lb or so.
• Ground beef (lean) - $6.00 450g tube -- Really a meh price for "tube meat".
• Steelhead trout fillet - $9.99 per lb -- Standard pricing for pink fish.
• Asparagus - $2.99 per lb -- Ok price for asparagus. I expect better from No Frills.
• Green beans - $2.99 per lb -- Same with the green beans, I expect a bit better.
• Cucumber - $0.99 each -- Good price for cucumber.
• Mini-cucumber - $3.99 11-pack -- Fair price on the 11-pack. Meanwhile, Maxi has the 6-pack for 88c… Sigh…
• Watermelon (9lb average) - $2.99 each -- Good price for melon.
• Ataulfo mangoes - $5.64 5lb case -- This should work out to about 8 or so mangoes. Good deal.
• Pineapple - $2.99 each -- Good price for pineapple.
• Brick cheese (Armstrong) - $5.49 400g bar -- Hmm, ya, seeing some 50c to $1 upward pressure on cheese pricing a little everywhere….
• Earth's Own plant bev - $3.79 1.74-1.89L jug -- Good price. Regular floats well into the $5-ish ranges.
• Dry pasta (Italpasta) - $1.25 750g packs -- Good price for dry pasta. Stock up a little. Maybe there's a potluck pasta salad in your future.
• Produce Price Rating: Generally quite low, selectively amazing for some items.

Produce Depot (usually a little late on the flyer) https://producedepot.ca/

• Ground beef (lean) - $4.99 per lb -- Fair rate for ground beef. Considering No Frills is selling 450g tube meat for $6, I'd buy this in a heartbeat. It's just not stock-up pricing.
• Beef New York striploin steak - $12.99 per lb -- I wish they'd mention the grade, but if it looks nice, it could make for a nice BBQ item.
• Whole atlantic salmon (fresh) - $6.99 per lb -- Now, it's not filet and deboned, but it's a heckin' deal for salmon.
• Wild-caught squid - $8.99 per lb -- Perhaps there's calamari in your future?
• Hothouse tomatoes - $1.29 per lb -- Great price for tomatoes!
• Green and red leaf lettuce - $1.69 per head -- Great price for leafy greens!
• Sweet orange peppers - $0.99 per lb -- AWESOME price for peppers!!!
• Brussel sprouts - $1.49 per lb -- Fantastic price for brussel sprouts! Often over $3/lb.
• Blackberries - $1.49 half pint -- Good deal for blackberries. Lots of blueberries going around, though.
• Red seedless grapes - $1.99 per lb -- Fantastic price for grapes! Often $4/lb.
• Peaches - $2.49 per lb -- These are from the USA. It could be a they come out a little tough. Leave them on the counter to ripen, but eat them fast after that!
• Cheese counter - Landana smoked cheese - $2.39 per 100g -- I'm partial to smoked cheese. This could make for a nice fancy burger topping.
• Deli - Genoa salami (Mastro) - $2.59 per 100g -- This isn't fantastic pricing, but fair. A 600g chub can clock in at $10-12 or so, this deli counter pricing is fairly competitive.
• Produce Price Rating: Medium-low with very competitive specials on a shortened flyer. The small flyer is nice because it doesn't uselessly feature $6 heads of cauliflower and extremely high-price items that are either a confusion on the consumer, or an insult on the injury of not being able to afford supreme quality items.

Real Canadian Superstore (price matcher)

• Beef rib-steak (ungraded) - $7.88 per lb -- More ungraded beef at graded prices.
• Pork tenderloin - $3.49 per lb -- Fair price for tenderloin.
• Duck (frozen, grade A) - $3.99 per lb -- Fairly regular price for duck.
• Golden Pompano (frozen) - $2.88 per lb -- This is advertised a lot at the RCSS. I've never seen it elsewhere. Does anyone have experience with it?
• Dressed Tilapia (frozen) - $2.88 per lb -- Dressed means tail and fines removed,
• Potatoes - $5.50 10lb bag -- Great price for potatoes.
• Corn - $0.40 per ear -- Awesome price for corn. This is probably loss-leader territory.
• Watermelon (11lb average) - $3.99 each -- Good price for a big melon.
• Pineapple - $3.00 each -- Good price for pineapple.
• Produce Price Rating: Generally medium-low pricing, selectively amazing for some items.

Sobeys

• Chicken thighs (boneless skinless) - $5.99 per lb -- Fair price for boneless chicken. There's better out there, however.
• Beef striploin steaks (AA) - $8.77 per lb -- Scene Member Price.
• Beef sirloin tip roast or marinating steaks (AAA) - $8.99 per lb -- Hmm, striploin AA versus sirloin tip AAA… Might be a toss up. Sirloin is leaner and has less marbling. But AAA might lend to a tenderness. This may be give and take, here…
• Lobster (live) - $10.99 per lb -- Scene Member Price.
• Pork chops - $3.49 per lb -- Not a great price, really, but it may be your option if you're stuck with Sobey's this week. Ad mentions it includes roasts.
• Picnic pork shoulder - $3.49 per lb -- We saw No Frills offereing this at 2.44/lb. A $1/lb more isn't great, admittedly. But, it's an option.
• Asparagus - $2.44 per lb -- Good price!
• Green beans - $2.67 per lb -- Good price!
• Bok choy - $0.99 per lb -- Amazing price. I don't get how other places charge $2/lb+ for choy, and then you have Sobeys of all stores swooping in to corner that side of the market.
• Asian pears - $0.99 per lb -- Awesome price!
• Brick cheese (Cracker Barrel) - $5.77 400g bar -- More of this elevated cheese pricing… Hmm….
• Produce Price Rating: Generally a high price store, especially for produce. Some items are 50% more than more value-oriented stores. Kinda like Metro, some of the deals can be quite good.

Super C

• Chicken breast (boneless skinless) - $4.44 per lb -- Awesome price!!
• Atlantic salmon - $9.88 per lb -- Standard sale price for pink fish.
• Pork tenderloin (marinated) - $3.44 per lb -- Good price. Not amazing. But, pre-marinated? Hmm, makes for an easy meal.
• Corn - $1.88 for 5 ears -- Awesome price!! Under 40c an ear!
• Broccoli - $1.33 per crown -- Very good price for broc, especially if the crowns are nice. A good crown can easily range over $2.
• Radishes - $0.99 per bunch -- Nice! A good addition to salads or veg trays.
• Green onions - $0.99 per bunch -- Fair price for green onion. It's hard to find it under $1.
• Mini-carrots - $0.99 340g bag -- Nice!
• Mini-cucumbers - $1.99 6-pack -- Fair going-rate now for mini cuce. A very welcome change from charging $4 for these packs.
• Mini-potatoes - $1.99 3lb bag -- Good price for mini potatoes. There's still better value in regular size potatoes most of the time. But, sometimes, these sales can negate that value proposition. Plus, these are nice a thousands ways to Sunday. They cook very quickly, and are great oven-roasted, steamed, and BBQ'ed with other veg.
• Apples (Empire, Spartan) - $3.99 3lb bag -- Fair price for apples these days, it seems. I think we'll be hard-pressed to find certain varieties for under $1/lb for a while.
• Strawberries - $1.63 454g shell -- Awesome price!!!
• Pineapple - $1.88 each -- Fantastic!
• Oranges - $2.99 3lb bag -- Good price for oranges!
• Mangos - $0.99 each -- Good price. Mangoes should clock in at around $1 each. Enough of these $2-3 mangos…
• Cantaloupe - $2.99 each -- Good price/fair sale price for cantaloupe.
• Cherries - $4.99 per lb -- Wow! Great price for cherries!!!
• Brick cheese (Black Diamond, Ptit Quebec) - $4.87 400g bar -- Nice to see we still ahve sub-$5 cheese options this week.
• Fancy cheese deal - $18.00 for 3 -- Apparently includes 20 different varieties.
• Produce Price Rating: Generally low, but can creep into medium for some items. But, there's always something decent available!

T&T Supermarket https://www.tntsupermarket.com

• Produce Price Rating: Usually very competitive, catering to Asian cuisine. Warning: their newest sales start on Fridays - so this is a late advertising of their sales.

Walmart

• Ground beef (lean) - $3.97 per lb -- Excellent rate on ground beef! Make your own burgers!!!!
• Chicken or Pork kabobs (Marcangelo) - $7.87 480-640g 8-packs -- It's basically $1 a kabob. That ain't bad for a ready-to-cook item. But, note that this translates essentially into 8/lb at worst, or 5.50/lb at best. There are WAY better deals on pork and chicken around.
• Asparagus - $2.97 per lb -- Fair price for asparagus.
• Corn - $0.32 per ear -- Best price on corn this week!
• Potatoes - $4.97 10lb bag -- Good price for a 10lb bag.
• Coleslaw kit - $2.77 397g kit -- Good price for a decent-size slaw kit.
• Strawberries - $1.84 454g shell -- Awesome price!!!
• Pineapple - $3.97 each -- Not bad. I like to see $3, and less shouldn't be taken for granted. Remember, it takes 2 years to grow a pineapple. One bad fungal disease and we should see these shoot up to $6-8 a piece. Treasure well-priced pineapple!
• Brick cheese (Armstrong) - $4.94 400g bar -- Another $5 brick cheese sale.
• Produce Price Rating: A little all over the place. Some really good prices between a lot of average pricing.

Costco (Note that these are the online/shipped prices - reduce each item by $3 for in-store pricing)

• NOTE: NEED TO REVISE - --
• Paper Towel (Kirkland) - $27.99 12-roll pack -- 2-ply; 160 sheets
• Paper Towel (Bounty) - $27.49 12-roll pack -- 2-ply; 86 sheets
• Toilet Paper (Kirkland) - $25.99 30-roll pack -- 2-ply; 380 sheets
• Toilet Paper (Cashmere) - $24.99 40-roll pack -- 2-ply; 250 sheets (on sale)
• Dish soap (Dawn Platinum) - $18.99 2.66L -- Food Basics often has this jug for $10!
• Laundry detergent (Purex) - $24.99 9.24L -- 250 loads
• Garbage bags (30 gallon; large) - $15.99 100-pack -- Amazon has Glad standard 74L bags, 100-packs for $23, sometimes less if on sale
• Countertop green bin liners - $21.99 125-pack -- Amazon has Glad Compostable green bin liners 100-packs for $18, sometimes less if on sale
• Produce Price Rating: I need to do a proper check to be sure, but I find it's pretty average. There's an illusion of getting a good deal because of the bulk. Just be careful.

Jean Coutu (new sales start Fridays)

• Produce Price Rating: I have to start checking these just in case...

Shoppers Drug Mart (new sales start Fridays)

• Produce Price Rating: Sometimes they have cheap butter, eggs, and milk on weekends.

Some additional references!

• Grocery Review Google Drive Location https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1xhLvBP1smXb1eSnxAW5yyBjO2aYFLJHC?usp=sharing
• Cooking Tips and Recipes https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1TCcHm9y0kWIa3x18hznKN2ix0BPcUv-m?usp=drive_link
• Google Maps list of the Grocery stores in Ottawa https://maps.app.goo.gl/YT7cZmv8vMQWU4J59

I graduate college soon and I want to have a dinner instead of a party. My mom is throwing a party just to state that she did something for me when all I really want is a simple dinner with my immediate family.
I told her that since she wants to throw the party I don’t want certain foods(i.e. my grandmothers cooking). I don’t even like her cooking like that so why should we bother.
She then proceeds to say how she’s wants the people I invite to bring a dish….A DISH. This isn’t a potluck. What’s the point of having a party if you’re just gonna have people bring the food?
Then to top it all off my boyfriend offered to grill the meats at the party and bring burger meat ONLY. She wants him to buy the chicken, ribs, and burger meat by himself. I told her that you should be happy that he is offering to buy the burger meat and grilling for you and she told me that that’s my man and it’s his just to provide.
Please let me know what I need to do at this point. I already told people about my graduation date but I’m thinking about telling them that the party is not gonna happen because of the bullshit my mother is suggesting we do.

I have bought this grill and I want to have friends over In summer for short ribs. I’ve posted here about smoking short ribs for guests and well, it doesn’t seem like a great idea.
So what do you suggest me to smoke just to learn before doing short ribs?
**I don’t eat pork
Edit: also, how can I know if the wood is ok to smoke with or not? Because I have some fireplace wood laying around that IDK its origin.
Edit two: Something preferably takes a but of time so I can get used to maintaining temperatures over long periods.

Let's get it all out of the way up front. I know, no one asked. No one cares. What kind of A hole can afford to eat at all these places. Yada yada.
The fact is the culinary scene is changing by the month here in St Pete. I view this as a good thing. After reading the 100th question asking where to eat and drink around town I thought I would document some places I've been to around St Pete for those who are interested. I enjoy spending my finite disposable income and leisure time exploring local eats & drinks with good company.
I am in no way qualified to be providing these unsolicited opinions. My opinions are probably all over the place and inconsistent - some will speak to value and others quality. These are in no particular order. There are hardly any chains on this list - I would much rather support local spots. Ready? Let's go.
Three Birds Tavern: Love the vibe of the outside patio. They even have a British telephone booth out there. Solid tavern / bar food. The lamb burger is fantastic. Shepherd's pie is not bad. Servers are so nice and bubbly. Worth it for lunch or brunch. Martini deals on Thursdays (I think they're $5).
Pin on Cafe: My go to lunch spot. Unfortunately they are moving down central a mile but they have fantastic pad Thai and a great value lunch menu, where you can build your own meal. Probably eaten here 30 times. Very friendly staff.
Bodega: If you're into Cuban sammies (don't hurt me but they're not my favorite) then this is the place. I'm told they're fairly authentic. Good speakeasy in the back. More on that below.
Bohemios: New Spanish tapas restaurant off central. Don't let the lingering BurgerFi sign fool you - the food here is exceptional. A tad expensive but good quality. They have been slow since opening but the chef & servers are super nice and love chatting to patrons. The chef is an especially awesome dude and a fantastic cook. Got the lobster cargo, empanadas, flank steak, meatballs, and lamb lollipops. All bangin'.
Frog Pond: Great family spot for breakfast or lunch. No frills / nothing fancy, just a good familial vibe and frogs painted on the walls. Got the BLT and pancakes. Both yummy.
Lure: Pretty cool place, but I still can't figure out what their "thing" is. Is it a sports bar? Billiard Hall? Sushi bar? Apparently it's all three. Surprisingly solid food (including the sushi), good music, fun place to hang out with a big group of friends before a show at the Floridian. Great happy hour and food specials.
Lemongrass: Solid Thai food. Went here for a date, and while that didn't go super well the food was again solid. Not mind blowing. But solid. Did I mention it was solid?
Zaytoon Grill: I love Mediterranean food. I had a kefta kabob, hummus, rice, salad. I admittedly need to try it again. It was decent, I've had much better kabob. But again, want to give it another try. I ordered takeout so can't comment on the place itself but I hear the staff are great.
EngineNo9: I was told this was the "best burger in town". This is false. Well, maybe for the money it is. After having just about every burger on the menu, I can say without a doubt the best burger in town is in fact Left Bank Bistro's Burger. My gawd. I think they sprinkle crack in the brie they put on top. Anyway, this is engine9. If my expectations were lower initially I think I would recommend it as a value play. Good place to watch sports. Jambalaya is meh. Sriracha wings are delicious though. So are the tots.
Tony's Pizza: A very solid pizza place always slinging deals on door dash. They have nice wide, thin slices, similar to NY style.
Gateway Subs: really good subs and creative too. For instance, you can get crushed Doritos on your sammy.
Brooklyn South: Middle of the road sandwiches for the price.
Mangosteen: I've only gotten takeout and thought their sushi was decent. This place and Lure seemed similar in their food offerings. When I walk by the vibe looks pretty cool. They do BOGO deals on door dash too.
Maple Street Biscuit Co: The hangover cure you've been looking for. Great biscuits & gravy. They have this fried chicken biscuit with a pepper jelly type thing and it's... Hang on I need a minute... Utterly delicious. Instead of giving them your name when you order, they ask you a thought provoking question, which is kind of fun (e.g. who in all of history would you want to meet?).
11 Chicks: Great Venezuelan food. Get an arepa and some of those to die for deep fried cheese things. Don't sleep on the 11 Chicks bowl. A little pricey for chicken and rice but the quality is chef's kiss.
Fresh Kitchen: Decently healthy, solid food. Like a healthy chipotle. You're in and out of there fast. If you need a somewhat healthy $12 bowl go here. Also everyone who eats there is somehow a fitness model and/or gorgeous.
Pacific Counter: Also a decently healthy, solid fast casual place serving poke bowls. Staff is super nice. Bring your dog - they will spoil with salmon skin treats.
Hotdog Stand (8th & Central): I haven't caught her name, but she slings awesome street hotdogs and puts a lot of love into the fixings on top. Bring up the TB Lightning or bring your dog and you will be her favorite.
Pia's: I know, it's in Gulfport. Fantastic Italian food. Sit out on the patio if you can - there is a good red/white checkered tablecloth vibe out there. Saw someone get engaged there. It's that kind of place, immersive, familial, and delicious. The shank and lasagna were heavenly.
Paul's Landing: Worth it to check out the view of the pier and pool while at the Vinoy. Grab a drink and some very good American food here with a date, or for brunch.
Sauvignon Wine Locker: Pasta - yes. Wine - fuck yes. Half off bottle deals on Sunday I believe. Definitely a nicer place and a draw for the rich old snowbirds. I hear some local billionaires frequent the place. Kind of a cool entrance, walking down a (safe) alley before climbing the stairs to get to it.
Fortu: Clubby, upscale asian fusion spot. Expensive but also very good. The wagyu potstickers are great. Go here for date night and pay way too much for cool drinks and very good Asian food. But your body will be swaying from the music and sexy vibe.
Social Roost: Fun spot, feels kind of like you're walking into a Great Gatsby party. Creative and delicious dishes and the price is about right. It's loud and social and a high energy place so go with friends or a date on a Friday or Saturday.
Datz: Very solid bar / American / brunch food. I got a fried chicken salad and it was really good. I know there's more to try and I will do so.
Ford's Garage: Great burgers. If you're a car person, it's definitely worth checking out. Even the bathroom has a tire for a sink.
La V: Highly recommend this place. Vietnamese, French fusion. Good Pho, banh mi, and rolls. Get the beef bourgingon- like dish and soak up the broth with a toasty french baguette. Baby, you've got a stew goin'.
Calida: super small but absolutely delicious spot. A husband and wife cook and run the place, and they only have one other server who is equally awesome. They make you feel like family and live to serve people good food. Menu changes often based on ingredients that are in season. Had the short rib, Icelandic fish dish (forget the name), and duck panang. My gawd was it yummy. Great wine list too. Oh, they're only open three nights a week so make a rezzy in advance.
Bavaros: Pretty good pasta, a little pricey for the portion. Was a fan of Bolognese and penne vodka. Fun outdoor vibe with the sidewalk seating. Sometimes I'll bring carry out to cellarmasters.
Pizza Box: super tiny pizza spot but REALLY good meatballs and quality pizza made in a legit pizza oven. Get it with hot honey and a glass of wine.
Left Bank: Lit'rlly the best burger in town. The prices are exhorbinant for what you get, but the quality is hard to beat. $40 for beef bourgingon pissed me off, but again the food is really good. Go here for brunch and sip French rosé, get a croque madam, or take a date here for steak frites.
Il Ritorno: Upscale Italian. For the price, it was decent. Compared to olive garden it's excellent. Liked Bonu better. Pretty upscale spot for a date night. For the money, I think there are better spots. Please don't hurt me.
Bonu: Very refreshing vibe, open and airy and filled with cool lights and plants. Really good menu - lobster ravioli and penne vodka were great. Try some of their more creative dishes as well, you won't be disappointed.
Wild Child: I only went once for a date and I think we walked in after a fryer fire or something. Seriously, when we walked in we were assaulted with an intense funnel cake-like fryer smell and thin layer of smoke. Food was okay, I can't even remember what we got. I will agree to go back and try it again since I keep hearing good things and I'm pretty sure this was a one off experience. The date went well though. Not that you care.
Cassis: Solid French bistro with a restaurant and a quick eats side to it serving ice cream, chocolate, and pizza. Pretty banging.
Bella Brava: Great pizza! Was surprised how good since its in a touristy spot on Beach drive. Good pasta too. I think they have a good deal on Tuesdays or something.
Allelo: Upscale and very high quality Mediterranean food and wine list. Loved this place. Get the octopus, lamb Bolognese, and/or rabbit & glass of red and you won't be sorry.
Shrimp Store: Very good local, fresh seafood + rice, beans type place. Stop by for lunch and try the grouper. Fish & chips and hush puppies are great. Good prices too. Definitely good value.
Teak (Pier restaurant): I know the pier is touristy. But it's also gorgeous. The view of the water from the restaurant is unmatched. You can see Tampa Bay and st Pete skylines really well, watch the sailboats, and small planes fly by. The food is surprisingly good here. It's worth checking out even if you're a local.
Doc Ford's: I'd call this place upscale beach shack food. It's good quality, prices are slightly high as it is a more touristy spot on the pier. Good live music and good vibes.
Trophy Fish: I really enjoyed how fun and unique this place is. It's all outside but kind of covered, and really fun looking at night with all the lights and plants. Big bar you can sit around and you order seafood out of the truck/shack behind it. Have to say it was pretty expensive for what it was but definitely high quality.
The Studio Public House: Come here to see some great British rock and euro futbol memorabilia. Fish and chips are great, as is the shepherds pie.
Hook's on 9th: Sushi & Thai food with a great sushi menu. Great quality for not much money. $10 sushi and/or dishes for lunch. Get some takeout, try the beef bulgogi and a couple rolls. You won't be sorry.
Rumfish Grill (St Pete Beach): they have an awesome floor to ceiling aquarium right in the dining room. It's mesmerizing and a little bizarre watching the (huge) fish swim around while eating their cousin. Good seafood. Worth a visit.
Urban Stillhouse: Very upscale dining and I have to say the quality and experience were well worth the money. The building itself is unimpressive from the outside, yet when you walk in you are transported to the fanciest mountain / lodge / chalet type vibe you can think of. Multi level restaurant serving up great lamb, steak, and sides. Bonus points if you stop by Lolita's before.
Mazarros: A St Pete staple, and very crowded. But really good sandwiches made there and high quality Italian grocery options. Awesome wine room too - sometimes they do tastings. They do cooking classes here but haven't tried them yet. Worth checking out once, there's no place quite like it.
Lolita's: such a cool building they've moved in to, right next to the bike trail. Very artsy vibe since they share the space with Morean. Very creative dishes and cocktails, gorgeous patio on which to enjoy them.
Paradise Grill (pass-a-grille): the beach shack place right on the beach. I don't know how you can beat their grouper sammy, ice cold iced tea, and that beach view steps away from the water.
Ted Peter's: smoked fish isn't my favorite I admit, but even I liked it. I had some of their non-smoked fish and it was banging. Ask to go see where the smoking is done next door, it's a unique way they cook fish there. Been around for 80+ years.
Poppos : I live nearby and have been here a few times. Was described to me as a "local chipotle". I really wanted to like it. It's average. The portions are small for what you pay for. Their bowls, like literally the paper bowl itself, has a huge indent and is raised from the bottom so it fits a lot less food than you'd think. Staff was super kind though.
Drinks/Bar Only:
Intermezzo: This is the date night spot. Lots of love put into each drink. Nice jazz music. Visiting during Christmas is a must as they deck the place out. They're moving right nearby in the coming months.
Cellarmasters: My favorite watering hole in town. By now you know I enjoy wine. This place isn't your typical wine bar - it's divey, hipster, and awesome. Bring a sub or takeout here and listen to the incredibly cool wine staff pick and pour you the perfect glass. They have a great selection of old world for $20-40 a bottle.
No Vacancy: Outdoor Clubby place, usually a good spot for a DJ and to rip shots / crash bachelor or bachelorette parties.
Steve's: cash only no frills/old school bar. Go grab a bud light in a bottle and roll with the sticky floors. A staple on central ave that's been there forever.
Tryst: Decent bar. Had a boat load of tequila there.
The Landing: Pre or post Jannus show it's a must to continue your high octane weekend night with music and dancing. Bathroom lines get real long so wear a diaper or get in line early. Or try to bribe others in line with a fiver.
Bar Chica: If you like craft cocktails, it's a must visit. Classy bar slinging really cool drinks. You walk thru Bodega to get to it.
Lost and Found: Great spot for a drink and live music. Food truck and big backyard to enjoy a drink under the stars. They were playing Terminator 2 on the TV there which shows you how cool the place is.
Enigma: I typically see this suggested (as a joke) to out of towners asking for a low-key place to have a drink. Well, joke's on them. Enigma is so fun. It is a gay bar, but assuming you're progressive enough to deal with that the drinks, music, dancing, and people are fantastic.
It's all culminated in this. My favorite restaurant in town. Bin6South! ... You will spend $100+ and still walk out hungry. It is not a value play. It is a quality play. There are only 6 barstools and one table fitting 6 people. Reservations are not easy to come by. This place is the product of a retired couple who wanted to make awesome food, pour good wine, and have a communal feel for locals. It's not for everyone. But if you like a chef's table vibe, try it. You can shoot the shit with the chef, owner, and sommelier while they serve you amazing food you've never tried and pour you delicious wine. Their venison and pork shoulder are banging. They also have lots of fun culinary and wine events so check that out.
If you like coffee, the following places are a must try for either the quality of their espresso, local art, and/or vibe:
The Shop & Coffee House
Black crow
Intermezzo
Book & Bottle
Kawha
Bad mother
Fray's donut house for donuts and breakfast sammies too
Bonus Tampa restaurants:
Oxford Exchange: A Harry Potter feeling to it with good brunch food. It has a library quality to it, you feel like British royalty eating here. Great place for a cheeky day glass of rosé or bubbly. Take a walk along the river walk before or after.
Berns: A must try. It's been there for 80+ years. The building itself has such cool decorations and pictures on the walls, and each room has a different theme. While their steak is just okay, for the price comes with French onion soup and onion straws. The best part of Bern's is their wine list. My gawd. They have over 500,000 bottles on site and more in their other building / cellar. I think it's the largest restaurant owned wine collection in the world. Because there are so many bottles, they often can't keep up with pricing for all of them. We got three different bottles from 1975 - 1987 for under $50 each. Their dessert room, cellar tour, and kitchen tours are a must. Check out my post history as I have something in there from the wine subreddit.
Oh and not in Tampa but best Chinese food around is Zom Hee in Seminole. Get their NY strip dish. It's banging. Cool old school spot.
Places I want to try: Rococo, Beau & Mo's, El Cap, Cappy's, Harvey's, Sammy's, Hookin' Ain't Easy, The Chattaway, Brick & Mortar, naked farmer, violet stone, Jack's London Grille, Bascoms, food trucks (Go Stuff Yourself), Nueva Cantina's fundido burger, eat art love, German Knodle, Ceviche, The Burg, Sara's Kebab House, Baba / Barbouni
Agree? Disagree? Any other places you'd add to the list? I will likely keep editing this post as other places pop in my mind that I've forgotten, and/or I eat somewhere new. Cheers.

First, congratulations to all the new Hokie graduates! And, Happy Mother's Day to all the mom's in town. With that said, here's a rundown of weekend fun you can enjoy in Blacksburg and across the New River Valley whether your a new grad, mom or just hanging out in the Burg.
Weekend Rundown of Fun: 1. 2024 Spring Carnival Friday, May 10, 2024, 5:00 - 11:00 PM, Saturday, May 11, 2024, 1:00 - 11:00 PM, Sunday, May 12, 2024, 1:00 - 10:00 PM Admission: Free Ride Tickets: $1.25 each and each ride takes multiple tickets, Unlimited Ride Wristbands: $25.00 per session Uptown Christiansburg (formerly New River Valley Mall) presents the 2024 Spring Carnival from Cole Shows Amusement Company starting on Thursday, May 2, 2024 continuing through Sunday, May 12, 2024. Enjoy amusement park rides, game booths, food and fun for the whole family. There is no gate fee. Unlimited wristbands are valid for one session which is 5:00-11:00 PM on Monday-Friday and either 1:00-6:00 PM or 5:00 PM to Close on Saturday and Sunday. Note: Hours are weather dependent. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777014
2. Throwback Double Feature: Shrek and Shrek 2 Starlite Drive-In Theatre, Christiansburg Friday, May 10, 2024 and Saturday, May 11, 2024, 8:30 - 11:40 PM Adults: $10.00, Kids Ages 6-12: $6.00, Kids Ages 5 & Under: Free The Starlite Drive-In Theatre presents a Throwback Double Feature featuring "Shrek" and "Shrek 2". "Shrek" is a 2001 animated film and "Shrek 2" is a 2004 animated film. Both films star the voices of Mike Myers, Eddie Murphy, and Cameron Diaz and are rated PG. Gates open at 6:30 PM and the first movie is expected to start around 8:30 PM. Concessions will be available for purchase. Cash or card accepted. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777372
3. College Baseball: Miami vs. Virginia Tech English Field, Virginia Tech Friday, May 10, 2024, 7:00 PM, Saturday, May 11, 2024, 7:00 PM, Sunday, May 12, 2024, 1:00 PM General Public: $10.00, Youth: $5.00 Watch the Virginia Tech Baseball Team compete against ACC conference opponent Miami in their three-game home series. Saturday will serve as Senior Day for all the senior Hokie players with a pre-game ceremony. On Sunday, there will be a special giveaway featuring flowers for all the mothers. It's also the Freshmen Class Trading Card Giveaway with post-game autographs with the freshmen class players, weather permitting. There will also be a Post-game Kids Run the Bases opportunity, weather permitting. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=776512
4. The Red Ferns and Smooth Brain in Concert The Milk Parlor, Blacksburg Friday, May 10, 2024, 8:30 PM - 12:00 AM Admission: $5.00 The Red Ferns is a groovy guitar band and Smooth Brain is a four-piece rock band. Both band are from Blacksburg, VA. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777365 5. Blacksburg Farmers Market with Music from Fats Holler Market Square Park, Blacksburg Saturday, May 11, 2024, 8:00 AM - 2:00 PM Admission: Free The Blacksburg Farmers Market offers local meats, organic produce, baked goods, crafts, flowers and more in the heart of downtown Blacksburg. Fats Holler will performer from 9:30-11:30 AM. Fats Holler is a new group, formed in 2022, of seasoned musicians from the New River Valley. Having a repertoire primarily of music from the 1910's-1930's, they are bringing the sounds of old New Orleans to Southwest Virginia. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777386
6. Scottish Highland Games Clinic YMCA of Pulaski County, Pulaski Saturday, May 11, 2024, 9:00 AM - 2:00 PM Admission: $25.00 Join the YMCA's very own instructor and professional Highland Game athlete Jonathan Harding to learn what it takes to compete in your first Highland Games. The goal of this event is to cover all nine events during the clinic. Jonathan was invited to the World Highland Games in 2023 and finished 7th overall! All skill levels welcome. Whether you are a beginner or a Highland Game athlete looking to improve on your technique, there will be something to gain. All proceeds from this clinic will go support the the YMCA's 2024 Highland Games Competition. For ages 15 and up. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777406
7. 2024 New River Valley Master Gardener Association Plant Sale Montgomery County Government Center, Christiansburg Saturday, May 11, 2024, 9:00 AM - 2:00 PM Admission: Free The New River Valley Master Gardener Association (NRVMGA) Plant Sale will be offering native plants, vegetables, annuals, herb, perennials, trees, shrubs and house plants. Many plants are grown by NRVMGA members and others are donated by retailers, individuals and organizations from throughout the area. There will also be a "garden supply/treasure area" with gardening related items for sale. The Plant Clinic will be on-site to answer your questions, problem plant issues, or gardening concerns. There will also be a selection of free seeds to give away to help support pollinators in our area. All proceeds fund our Community Grants Program which provides funding for educational gardening projects throughout the New River Valley. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=776743
8. Mustangs of the New River Valley Car Show Clayton Homes of Dublin, Dublin Saturday, May 11, 2024, 9:00 AM - 3:00 PM Admission: Free Clayton Homes of Dublin presents Mustangs of the New River Valley Car Show and a chance to check out their homes. Enjoy the Countryman Jamaican Grill food truck, sweet rides, and fun for the whole family. Plus, there will be trophies for the car show contestants with the best classic mustang, best modern mustang, and best overall. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777371
9. Spring Fever Handcrafted Market Glencoe Mansion, Museum & Gallery, Radford Saturday, May 11, 2024, 10:00 AM - 3:00 PM Admission: Free Shop local and handmade at the Spring Fever Handcrafted Market. Enjoy shopping with 20+ unique & one-of-a-kind artisans, makers, and modern crafters as well as food & dessert vendors including the Radford High School Performing Arts who will be holding a Snacks & Sodas fundraiser for guests. Make sure to visit the Glencoe Mansion Gift Shop, which is also home to unique handcrafted goods & Radford themed souvenirs. Glencoe Museum will be open until 4:00 PM. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=776736
10. 2024 Spring Open House P. Buckley Moss Gallery, Blacksburg Saturday, May 11, 2024, 11:00 AM - 4:00 PM and Sunday, May 12, 2024, 12:00 - 3:00 PM Admission: Free Meet the artist P Buckley Moss herself as we introduce her latest edition "Changing the Future" depicting the newest Corps of Cadet Buildings on the Virginia Tech Campus. Come in and celebrate her 91st year! the gallery will have a large selection of university themed prints and original watercolours for your graduating seniors as well as something for everyone in the family. Make sure to put your name in the hat for our P Buckley Moss Gift basket which will be drawn on Sunday at 3:00 PM. Parking is available on the street and in the city lot across from the gallery as well as in the Kent Square parking garage. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=776766
11. Carriage Rides for Mother's Day Draper Mercantile and Trading Company, Draper Saturday, May 11, 2024, 11:00 AM - 3:00 PM and Sunday, May 12, 2024, 2:00 - 6:00 PM Carriage Rides: $20.00 Take a charming carriage ride around Draper Mercantile's picturesque village and create memories that will last a lifetime from Suthers Carriage Company. Perfect for capturing those special moments with Mom. Additionally, indulge in our delectable new food and beverage items specially curated for the month of May. Online reservations are available. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777395
12. Earth Day - We Didn't Miss It! JBR Vineyards LLC, Pearisburg Saturday, May 11, 2024, 12:00 - 5:00 PM and Sunday, May 12, 2024, 1:00 - 5:00 PM Admission: Free Wine Pricing: Tasting: $5.00, Glass of Wine: $5.00, Bottles of Wine: $15.00-$20.00 plus tax Every day is earth day at JBR Vineyards. They take very good care of their vines because planet Earth is the only planet with wine. See our vineyard and taste wines from grapes rarely grown in Virginia. Remember to celebrate with your graduate and bring mom on her special day. Dogs and kids welcome. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777282
13. Free Outdoor Acroyoga Class and Jam Henderson Lawn, Virginia Tech Saturday, May 11, 2024, 1:00 - 3:00 PM Admission: Free In Balance Yoga presents a Free Outdoor Acroyoga Class and Jam. Learn about the playful practice of Acroyoga in a safe environment. No experience or partner is necessary. This free event will consist of one hour guided learning, and one hour of free form jam time. In case of rain, the rain location will be In Balance Yoga at their 1512 North Main Street location. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777118
14. Mount Tabor Ruritan Club's 2024 Fish Fry Kickoff with DJ Earl Brown Slusser's Chapel Church of God, Blacksburg In Person: Adults: $12.00, Children Ages 3-11: $6.00, Children Under 3: Free, Carry-Outs: $12.00 The Mount Tabor Ruritan Club presents their 2024 Fish Fry Kickoff and May event under the picnic shelter below the lower church parking lot. Enjoy a serving fish, fries, slaw, homemade desserts, and beverage. DJ Earl Brown will be spinning some hits to get the 2024 fry season off to a swinging start. This is a fundraiser for the Ruritan Club's community service projects and scholarships. The event will be held rain or shine. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=776749
15. 2024 Rockin' Main Street Concert Series Kickoff with The Jared Stout Band and Noah Spencer Downtown Christiansburg, Christiansburg Saturday, May 11, 2024, 5:00 - 9:00 PM Admission: Free The Town of Christiansburg and the Christiansburg Parks & Rec kicks off their 2024 Rockin' Main Street Concert Series featuring music from The Jared Stout Band and Noah Spencer. Celebrate food and music in downtown Christiansburg. Attendees can purchase food and drinks from a selection of food trucks and wine & beer vendors. Get ready to experience the high-octane energy and soulful sound of the Jared Stout Band. This alt-country powerhouse hails from Southwestern Virginia and is known for their unique blend of Appalachian rhythm and blues. As runners-up for the "On-The-Rise" award at FloydFest 22, the Jared Stout Band delivers an unforgettable performance by bringing their own energetic and soulful original songs to the stage. Noah Spencer is an up and coming musician from Richlands in Southwest Virginia. He brings a genuine passion to the stage with a voice that's both soft and smooth, but also gritty and soulful. His shows cover a wide range of styles from country to rock, Americana, pop, and gospel. He enjoys singing and playing guitar, drums, piano and the ukulele. Noah was also a contestant and starred on NBC's "The Voice" in Season 24 advancing to the playoff rounds. Please bring your IDs if you would like to purchase beer or wine. Tables and chairs will be set up along Main Street. However, attendants are encouraged to bring lawn chairs to sit at the square and watch the live music. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=776697
16. 2024 Bluegrass and Baseball Benefit with Lonesome River Band, Gold Rush and Hot Dog Supper Newport Community Center, Newport Saturday, May 11, 2024, 5:30 - 9:30 PM Admission: $25.00 Enjoy a night of legendary bluegrass music with nationally known bluegrass artists the Lonesome River Band along with opener and Giles County's own Gold Rush to support the youth baseball and softball programs in the Newport community starting at 7:00 PM at the 3rd Annual Bluegrass and Baseball Benefit. A hotdog supper will precede the event starting at 5:30 PM in the cafeteria along with a raffle which will include a banjo autographed by both the Lonesome River Band and Gold Rush as well as other items. Lonesome River Band continues their reputation as one of the most respected names in bluegrass music. Led by five-time International Bluegrass Music Association (IBMA) Banjo Player of the Year and Virginia Country Music Hall of Famer Sammy Shelor, the group holds a powerhouse line up of award-winning players. In 2023, over 150 kids participated on teams based in Newport. This concert helps provide essential funding for uniforms, equipment, practice space, and experiences for players age 3-16. Donations are always welcome to the Newport Sports Booster Club, a registered 501c3 organization. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777383
17. Irish Trad Jam with Mist on the Mountain Rising Silo Farm Brewery, Blacksburg Saturday, May 11, 2024, 6:00 - 9:00 PM Admission: Free Mist on the Mountain is an Irish Traditional Music group based in the New River Valley. From lively jigs and reels to heartbreaking laments and rollicking ballads, Mist on the Mountain provides great Irish music for any occasion. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777070
18. Father Sun in Concert Dogtown Roadhouse, Floyd Saturday, May 11, 2024, 8:00 - 11:00 PM Admission: Free Father Sun embodies the true spirit of reggae with a blend of experienced artistry and youthful energy. Father Sun’s repertoire encompasses reggae covers and original compositions, each note carrying the authentic vibe of the genre. Their performances are not mere musical exhibitions; they are heartfelt celebrations of life and the universal language of music. Join Father Sun on their musical odyssey, where the essence of reggae is embraced and shared, connecting soul and spreading positivity wherever their music is heard. Laying the bassline of this musical journey is Janiah Allen, a seasoned musician known for his collaborations with Alliens, Music Road Co, Solazo, Jordan Harman & the Humble Brags, Sol Roots and The Ambassador. Alongside Janiah is his son, Nyo Allen, whose exceptional drumming skills bring life to Father Sun’s beats. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777370
19. Mother's Day Brunch Buffet Our Daily Bread Bakery & Bistro, Blacksburg Sunday, May 12, 2024, 9:00 AM - 2:00 PM, Adults: $35.00, Kids: $17.00 The Mother's Day Brunch Buffet Menu includes: Herb Roasted Prime Rib, Spiral Ham, Salmon with Lemon and Dill, Sausage & Ham Strata, Mushroom, Spinach & Gruyere Strata, Herb Roasted Garlic Potatoes, French Toast Casserole, Maple Chicken Sausage Links, Scrambled Eggs, Assorted Breads and Pastry and more. Tax and gratuity not included. No reservations. The buffet is first come, first serve. Mimosas, espresso and more will be available a la carte. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=775117
20. Mother's Day Brunch Buffet Bull & Bones Brewhaus & Grill, Blacksburg Sunday, May 12, 2024, 11:00 AM - 3:00 PM Adults: $35.00, Kids 6-12: $10.00, Ages 5 & Under: Free Bull & Bones Brewhaus & Grill presents a Mother's Day Brunch Buffet. The Mother's Day Brunch Buffet Menu entrees include Smoked Salmon with Dill, Sliced Grilled Loin Steak, French Toast with Syrup and Fruit Compote, Biscuits and Sausage Gravy, Smoked Ribs and Pork & Brisket among others along with sides and Strawberry Shortcake with Whipped Cream Price fr dessert. The buffet includes coffee, juice and condiments. Reservations are available via email.Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=775100
21. Mother's Day Celebration with Music from Leslie Brooks Moon Hollow Brewing, Blacksburg Sunday, May 12, 2024, 2:00 - 8:00 PM Admission: Free Musician Leslie Brooks will be performing on the patio from 4:00-7:00 PM, slushies will be available from 2:00-8:00 PM for a special Mother's Day Slushie Sunday and Driftwood Catering food truck will be on site. Leslie Brooks is a singer-songwriter, performing solo with guitar, playing jazz, folk, blues, rockin' country and popular favorites originally. She has played the best venues in a 16-state area, as well as in Norway and Monte Carlo. Opened for Heart, James Taylor, Bob Margolin and Willie Nelson to name a few. Latitude-Permanent Jewelry Co. will also be on site doing permanent jewelry from 3:00-7:00 PM. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=777369
22. Author Night with Justin Nobel Blacksburg Books, Blacksburg Sunday, May 12, 2024, 5:00 - 6:30 PM Admission: Free Blacksburg Books presents an Author Night with Justin Nobel and his special guest Pierson Keating. Justin Nobel will share findings from his book "Petroleum-238" which is an acclaimed science journalist’s extraordinary seven-year investigation into how the U.S. oil and gas industry has avoided environmental regulations and created a dangerous and radioactive public health crisis. Nobel relies on oilfield workers, community activists, a century of academic research, and a trove of never-before released industry and government documents to lay out a series of game-changing reveals into the world’s most powerful industry. Justin Nobel writes on science and environment for US magazines, investigative sites, and literary journals. His work has been published in Best American Science and Nature Writing and Best American Travel Writing. His 2020 Rolling Stone magazine story, "America’s Radioactive Secret," won an award for longform writing with the National Association of Science Writers and inspired this book. Justin has been reporting on fracking in West Virginia for seven years and one of the first people he met was Pierson Keating's mother, April Pierson-Keating, who was a West Virginia land protector and visionary grassroots activist. Justin did not know April's son Pierson, but since April's passing they have developed a bond around their shared vision to spotlight her environmental causes. Pierson is a musician and presently living in Austin, with deep musical roots in West Virginia, and will be playing music inspired by his mother. No registration needed, just show up. Link: http://www.nextthreedays.com/FeaturedEventDetails.cfm?E=775376
And, for the music lovers, here's a look at the weekend music lineup: http://www.nextthreedays.com/featuredevents.cfm?ET=1
Thanks for reading and have a great & safe weekend!

Finally got around sharing our wonderful experience in Kansai (1 Apr 2024 - 10 Apr 2024). We are a family of 4 from Perth, Australia (1 x Toddler turning 4 end of this month and 1 x Infant about 18 months old) joined by my MIL from Malaysia. It was our first time trip to Japan but the second time flying 6 hours long with 2 kids. We chose to travel during this period as it was during Easter holidays and also the most favourable weather for our kids. As we have 4 separate accommodations booked over 9 days, we try to travel as light as possible: 2 x large suitcase, 1 x medium suitcase, 2 x medium bags, 1 x bag pack, 1 x dedicated bag for infant carrier and kids' jumpers + 1 stroller. Our kids still take nap(s) during the day and our plan was having the toddler sleep on the stroller and the infant in the carrier or the stroller if toddler is not using.
After extensive research (mostly from this sub) we still found the first few days to be quite hectic and wish we know some of the things beforehand (listed below the itinerary). I hope this post can help young families who are considering travelling to Japan with kids or those who have travelled to Japan before kids came to the picture to do it again with confidence.

9 Day Itinerary (1 Apr 2024 - 10 Apr 2024)

Day 1 Osaka: Namba (Monday)
Our flight from KUL arrived KIX around 10am and boarded the Nankai Rapid (bought 1 month prior online) to Shin-Imamiya station after getting our luggage. We originally planned to take a taxi from there but failed to find any taxi for 20 mins so we end up walking to our accommodation as the kids were tired of waiting. After offloading our luggage we manage to hail a taxi and head to Namba Parks to rest and unwind. Had a refreshing lunch at Yasaiya Mei (mains + all you can eat side dishes including veg tempura) and went to explore the rooftop parks garden before putting the kids to nap. After the kids woke up we took a taxi back to check in officially. Everyone was quite tired thus we opted to stay in and get dinner from Life supermarket nearby. This was probably the most enjoyable part of the day for the kids wandering around a foreign supermarket as we bought dinner and some light snacks. After putting the kids to bed, we did some laundry and packed our 1st luggage to send away.
Day 2 Osaka: Tennoji (Tuesday)
While everyone was getting ready, I went to the nearby 7-Eleven to forward our 1st luggage to the 4th accommodation via Yamato transport. The shop attendant was helpful and guided me through the process as we communicated via deepL. We walked to the Lawson's at JR Imamiya to get brekkky before taking the Osaka loop Line to JR tennoji. We took quite a while to navigate towards Tennoji Zoo from JR Tennoji but eventually got there after a 15 min detour. It was quite crowded for a Tuesday morning but the kids get to roam around the Tenshiba garden while I queue up for tickets (500 yen per adult). One of the kids fell asleep in the zoo so we decided to just grab food to go at the supermarket outside the zoo for lunch. We then head towards Abeno Q's mall to shop and put the other kid to sleep. There was quite a lot of hot food along the way and we manage to grab some for the kids to snack on after their nap (butaman from Horai 555, mochi donut from Mister Donut, taiyaki etc). There's a fantastic area for kids to play (kid, play, study) at the ground floor with different sensory setup and soft blocks for stacking/ balancing. I spent close to 2 hours there with 2 kids while my wife and MIL went shopping. After that we had dinner at Grand Capital Toyoutei at the Kintetsu mall dining floor before heading to our final activity of the day: Abeno Harukas 300. Tickets were a bit steep (2000 yen per adult) but we end up staying there for quite a bit and the experience was pretty unique even though we missed the sunset timing. The elevator ride to the top though short left quite an impression. The kids enjoyed running around at the sky garden 2 floors below as we rest and enjoy the night view of the city from about 300m above ground. The journey back to our accommodation was pretty straightforward and the kids got knocked out when we got home. All in all Tennoji was a pleasantly great experience and we have a better understanding about JR station layout and navigating underground.
Day 3 Osaka - Kyoto (Wednesday)
This was a rather hectic day as it rained quite a bit and we struggled to get a taxi after checking out, getting turned down by several taxis with "空车". We eventually found one to bring us to JR Osaka station. Navigating at the station wasn't too difficult after yesterday but there were long queues when we arrived at 10am and I made the fatal mistake of leaving my physical credit card back in Perth and spent 45mins trying to redeem limited express tickets I reserved online. The JR staff were friendly and tried their best to help but they can only recommend me cancelling my initial reservation and buying new tickets (cancellation fee was about 2300 yen for 3 adults). As soon as we got our tickets we sprinted to the underground gate about 15 mins walk away. I even carried the stroller and kids through an escalator as we didn't want to waste time finding a lift and risk missing the train. We managed to board the limited express train on time and arrived at JR Kyoto which was even more crowded and larger than most international airports. The kids were quite cranky by now as it has been all rush and long waits since they woke up. I split up with my family with 2 luggage that we initially planned to forward to our Arashiyama accommodation via Sagawa. However I was told same day delivery service is only applicable to limited hotels so I stored the luggage at 2 coin lockers and then head to the Kintetsu line ticket counter to redeem the Kyoto-Nara and Nara-Osaka limited express tickets which fortunately doesn't require my credit card details (just reservation number). By the time I reunite with my family it was still raining and both kids fell asleep so we ditched the plan for Kyoto railway museum and instead went browsing for lunch at Porta and Isetan dining floor. We eventually queued to eat at Ejuan for about 25 minutes while one of the kid was still asleep. The wait was worthwhile as the grilled miso black cod was exceptional as was the kids' grilled chicken. Next we went to the skywalk at level 9 briefly before my family went to the toy section at Isetan while I retrieve our luggage from the coin lockers. We board the Saga line bound for Saga-Arashiyama and rested awhile at the accommodation before heading out for dinner after the rain stopped. We walked to Kijurou and fortunately they have space for us provided we order a main meal per adult. The yakiniku and Wagyu rib loin bowls were pretty good but we find the Hitsumabushi set a bit gimmicky. After dinner we stopped by Kimono Forest on our way back and this was probably the highlight of the kids day.
Day 4 Kyoto: Arashiyama (Thursday)
Had Lawson's for brekky before heading out to Kimono Rental Amuya to hired kimonos for my wife and toddler including hairstyling. The shop was actually a house with the living area turned into a studio and only the owner working by herself so we waited for about half an hour before walking towards the Bamboo Forest and Tenryu-ji gardens (500 yen entry from the north gate but well worth it for the blooming sakura and picturesque lake). It was crowded as expected and everyone was moving slowly so it took us about an hour to complete the loop back to the main tourist strip. We then had Udon for lunch at Ozuru, the chewy noodles were complemented by the broth which was a lot more flavourful than the kitsune Udon we are accustomed to back in Perth. After lunch we head home to put the kids to nap before venturing out in the evening towards Togetsukyo Bridge overlooking the pristine Katsura river flowing gracefully from Mt Arashi in the backdrop. The view was breathtaking and we crossed over to Arashiyama park where the kids had a great time running around free range. As the sun was setting, we head back to the town centre, took a novelty Randen ride and grab some food (Naruse's Unagi, Upit's Burger) en route to our accommodation to eat in before calling it a day.
Day 5 Kyoto (Friday)
After checking out we took the Saga line to JR Kyoto station and forwarded the medium sized luggage to the 4th accommodation in Osaka using Crosta. We then did some light shopping at Yodabashi Camera Kyoto as my MIL shoes had kick the bucket and we needed a replacement. Manage to sneak in the only ramen meal of the trip at Ramen Chabuton located upstairs. It was a fairly small shop but we were lucky to get a table just before the Friday lunch rush hour and our ramen cravings were thoroughly satiated. We put the kids down for a quick nap as we make our way back to JR Kyoto to take the Saga line towards Kyoto railway museum. This is an underrated attraction with so much to do and we could have spent the whole day here if I knew they had coin lockers. There were many interactive and educational displays relating to train components in addition to multiple play areas upstairs as well as an outdoor playground! There's also a mockup ticket gate for kids to learn how to purchase a ticket and pass through the gate. Our kids loved the ball pit, toy train area and large train simulator. We couldn't squeeze enough time to explore the 3rd floor or watch the diorama presentation or board the Steam Locomotive as it was getting late. We took a taxi to check-in at Kamoya Ryokan before taking the bus to Nishiki Market for dinner. It's about 6pm and most of the shops were shutting and the remaining ones that are open had queues building up quickly. We ended up waiting 30 mins to eat sushi at Sushi Say. There's a limited range of cooked food including skewers which we got for our kids while we share a nigiri platter and sashimi. After dinner we went to the basement of Daimaru Kyoto across the road to get some baked goods for brekky before taking the taxi home to crash.
Day 6 Kyoto (Saturday)
My MIL wanted to take it easy and explore the area at her own pace so we had a more spontaneous day. After brekky, we took the bus to Yasaka Shrine and started our trek towards Heian Jingu, stopping along the way to enjoy the blossoming park and munching on food from street vendors. We paid to enter the shrine garden (600 yen per adult) which was very worth it for a 30 minute stroll and escape from the bustling crowd outside. We grab some food to eat from the street vendors as one of the kid slept and then head to the playground across the road (Wagener Square) and spent a good 30 minutes there even though it was a bit basic (Perth is blessed with many great playgrounds). Once both kids are feeling refreshed we felt adventurous and took the bus to attempt the hike up Kiyomizu-dera. Since its a Saturday, the Sannenzaka path was packed with phenomenal crowds with the occasional car coming through and splitting the crowd apart. I carried the infant to sleep while my wife push our toddler on the stroller as we slowly make our way up, stopping by for a nice matcha latte and softserve at Here cafe to recharge. We eventually reached the base of the temple after 30 minutes and decided against entering due to the massive crowds (& stairs!). On the way down we reached the fork that branches into Ninenzaka and thought we try giving it a go. There were a lot more stairs over this side and we had to carry the stroller through the steps while waiting for the crowd to advance before us. As physically draining as it was, we felt a sense of achievement as we manage to snap a photo with the iconic Hokanji temple. We took the bus home after that and had an enjoyable dinner at Okonomiyaki Yoshino next door before an early night to recover.
Day 7 Kyoto - Nara - Osaka (Sunday)
We had some leftover food for brekky before checking out and heading to JR Kyoto via taxi. We head to the Kintetsu line and boarded the Vistacar limited express train to Nara. I've booked for the private room down stairs which was pretty spacious for the 5 of us and our luggage. After arriving at Kintetsu-Nara station, we took the 100 yen tourist bus to the famous Nara Deer Park and started exploring the area. There were plenty of deer roaming throughout/ resting on the ground and several vendors at the entrance selling deer crackers. After the kids were done feeding 2 sets of crackers, we head to Mizuya Chaya for lunch. There were limited seating so we sat by the side and ate with the bowl in our hands while feeding the kids. Probably the best Udon we had in our lives (level above Ozuru in Arashiyama and Hifumiya in Perth). Time for a nap so we put the kids down while making our way to have a closer look at Todaiji temple as there were too many stairs to Kasuga-taisha and we have yet to recover. We had our first Cremia here and it was amazing. After the kids woke up we took the bus back to Kintetsu-Nara station and explored the nearby street while waiting for our train. We then boarded the HINOTORI limited express bound for Osaka. While walking towards the hotel to check in, we were passing by Dotombori and opted to have a quick dinner and call it a day rather than coming out again after checking in and offloading our luggage. We ended up having curry at Hariju Dotombori Curry shop which taste d like a homely nourishing meal. After dinner we took the taxi to the hotel and fortunately our 2 other luggage that we forwarded days before are waiting for us to collect. Did some repacking and also laundry at a nearby laundromat before sleep.
Day 8 Osaka: Osaka Bay Area (Monday)
Started the day with brekky at MOS Burger just outside our hotel before taking the metro train to Osaka Bay Area. There were plenty to see as we approach the Kaiyukan, large LEGO animal displays, the large ferris wheel and Disney characters. The ticketing and entry time is staggered which is a good idea to control the amount of crowds going in and out. I started queueing at 1035am and got entry for 11am which was fair (opted not to book timeslot online as it can be unpredictable with kids and public transit) but we didn't felt like its a long wait as the kids were running around and enjoying the ocean view. The entry also have a photographer stationed to take a family polaroid with a whale shark replica for FREE. We were impressed with the aquarium's efficient layout where some prominent displays (Whale Shark, Seals etc) span across multiple floors so you can still enjoy them later on if you missed it earlier due to the crowds. Apart from sea creatures there are also Arctic mammals and birds (Puffins) from all over the world. The kids were over stimulated by lunch time so we head to the food court at Tempozan Market Place to refuel. After lunch we took the kids for a ferris wheel ride before putting both to sleep while we make our way to Shinsaibashisuji Shopping Street via metro line. As the kids were still asleep, I rested at Daimaru with my MIL while my wife went shopping. This turn out to be a fantastic place with a floor dedicated for kids (Pokemon centre, Pokemon cafe, BorneLund mini play area with many display toys available for sampling). The kids spent the rest of the day here after they woke up and we had dinner at the dining floor. There were queues everywhere and we chose to wait at Aozora Blue as they offer udon made with a higher wheat ratio here. Regrettably the kids didn't enjoy as much and prefer regular ones that we are used to. After dinner we took away cheescake from Rikuro for dessert back at our hotel. I made sure to online check in our flights before I go to bed.
Day 9 Osaka: Dotombori (Tuesday)
Our final day in Japan and we chose to do some shopping and take it easy. Tried Doutor Coffee for brekky (took a while to find as it was underground) before walking to Don Quijote at Dotombori. There's 6 floors crammed with various items: snacks, electronics, clothing, non prescription medication, toys, collectibles as well as a functional ferris wheel (operates after 2pm). That being said the kids got bored after awhile and didn't really enjoy much as there wasn't much space to move around. I brought them out to stroll around the Ebisu-bashi Bridge while my wife and MIL continue their haul. It was certainly a sight to behold: countless amount of large LCD screens with surround sound on full blast from every high rise building, street buskers vying for attention from crowds that were constantly on the move, tourists taking selfies in front of the iconic Glicoman. Sadly it started to drizzle so I quickly entered the Shinsaibashisuji Shopping Street undercover area and look for a place to have lunch. I stumbled across a Yoshinoya & Hanamaru joint food hall which was bustling with both locals and foreigners. You have to order and get your food from the counter before you can occupy a table so I waited for my wife and MIL to arrive before we start queueing up. We had the gyudon and beef Udon with onsen egg along with chicken karaage and tempura. There's also a condiment station with toppings to complement your udon as well as free tea and water. Everything was very affordable and best of all we didn't had to wait long. After lunch my wife continuing shopping while we head to Daimaru for the kids to have a nap and play afterwards. I noticed there's a bridge that connects each floor to the Parco next door and discovered a unique floor full of pop culture themed stores including a studio Ghibli store featuring Totoro and No-Face displays, a 2 ft tall Godzilla, Ultraman, Capcom superstore, Sanrio (Hello Kitty), Snoopy, Rilakkuma and also a LEGO store. The kids had a great time browsing and also playing with LEGO before my wife reunites with us. As it's nearing dinner time, I thought we try our luck getting a table at Ganko Dotombori and make our way towards Ebisu-bashi Bridge. The view here is even more spectacular at night with the contrasting lights as well as numerous LCD displays illuminating the area. Unfortunately there's a lengthy wait at Ganko and our party voted for street food instead which turn out surprising well. Kids devoured a dozen gyozas while we had takoyaki, kobe beef nigiri, yakitori and yakiniku skewers as we strolled along the street. It was still early so we made a detour towards Hozenji before walking back the hotel. Then we stumbled upon an arcade (Amuse Factory AXE) which naturally drawn the kids in, we got popcorn from a vending machine there and it was enough to keep the kids happy on our trek back. Before taking our last sleep in Japan, we organized our luggage and get them ready for check out the next day.
Day 10 Osaka: Sayonara (Wednesday)
Checked out of the hotel and took a private airport taxi to KIX. Had brekky at McD and Lawsons and surprised to find that the food here costs the same as outside (e.g. McD/ Hungry Jacks at Malaysian/ Australian airports cost more than the metro/ suburban outlets). Boarded the flight and bid Japan farewell for now while soaking in the surreal time we had.
List of accommodations for 3 adults and 1 child + 1 infant/ toddler
1. Orange House 701 (22,500 yen for 2 nights) 10/10
Location is not bad in a quiet area South of the bustling Dotombori area with Konbinis and JR Imamiya within walking distance. Washing machine, shower and stove took some time to figure out and my kid accidentally turned on the stove but luckily there's a safety button. Overall a brilliant accommodation at an affordable price and will consider returning if we come back to Osaka with kids.
2. Arashiyama bamboo guest house (55,650 yen for 2 nights + 1200 yen tax) 8/10
Prime location 1 min away from JR station, Lawson and walking distances to the local tourist strip, Bamboo Grove, Tenryu-ji and Togetsukyo Bridge. However the room is located on the 3rd floor with no lift so it can be a challenge for kids and older folk. The owner was kind enough to carry our 2 X 20kg luggage up and speaks a little English. The stay was rather comfortable even with futons to sleep on while my MIL slept on one of the single beds. We are unlikely returning to Arashiyama but would recommend this place if it suits your budget.
3. Kamoya Ryokan (35,400 yen for 2 nights + 2000 yen tax) 7.5/10
Not as central as the other accommodations but still within 10 mins walking distance to JR and bus lines. This is a shared accommodation so fridge, microwave and hot/ cold water is in the common area but we have a private bathroom to use. There are no beds so we all slept side by side on futons in the same room. For some reason kids are also taxed to stay a night here (200 yen) but the host was super friendly, spoke a bit of basic English and helped us with ordering a taxi when we checked out. For the price this is not a bad place for short term stay if cosleeping on futons together as a family is acceptable. Bonus: the okonomiyaki place next door is quite good albeit requiring a bit more effort to communicate but is worth it as plenty of locals seem to frequent there and our kids love the yakisoba.
4. Best Western Hotel Fino Osaka Shinsaibashi (40,450 yen for 3 nights) 8/10
Functional hotel relatively close to Shinsaibashi shopping street and Dotombori. 1 min walk away from Osaka metro station and 7 Eleven. There's also a 24 hour laundromat 5 mins walk away. Facilities are bare minimal but gets the job done as we only needed the place to crash and freshen up since there's a lot of shopping and remaining sightseeing to be done. All reception staff spoke English well and check in/ out was rather smooth. I would consider staying again if the rooms were larger but can't complain at this price point and location.
List of eateries we consider returning

• Yasaiya Mei
• Ejuan
• Kijurou
• Ozuru
• Upit's Burger
• Ramen Chabuton
• Okonomiyaki Yoshino
• Mizuya Chaya
• Yoshinoya & Hanamaru

Highlight of each day for the kids

1. Wandering around Life supermarket and exploring a new accommodation
2. Running around 300m above ground at the Abeno Harukas sky garden while having fruits/ snacks in between
3. Visiting Kimono Forest after dinner, watching the randen pass by at the crossing
4. Running around at Arashiyama park and watching the majestic Katsura river flowing rapidly
5. The outdoor playground at Kyoto railway museum among many other fun things there
6. The playground at Wagener Square across Heian Jingu
7. Interacting with deer and eating udon outdoors
8. Seeing different sea animals up close and ferris wheel ride after
9. Making friends at BorneLund and having imaginary play together despite the language barrier

Lessons learned (not in chronological order)

General tips

• We prepared about 160,000 yen cash before arriving at Japan but also have money via 1 x transfer wise debit card (digital), 1 x Westpac credit card (digital), 1 x ING debit card (physical). We ended up withdrawing a further 200,000 yen worth of cash. We opted not to bring any AUD as the rate is quite poor in Japan since most would prefer foreign exchangers would prefer USD.
• We didn't get to use our digital cards as most places in Kansai (Kanto might be different) that offer card payments still requires a physical card to read the chip.
• Please remember to bring the physical card of the credit card used for any online booking to avoid the stress I endured on day 3.
• We booked all the transit tickets online about a month prior and find it worthwhile rather than spending 15 - 30 mins in queue at the ticket counters. The limited express tickets go crazy fast and I recommend booking them the hour they become available (1 month prior your transit date and as soon as it is open in Japan time).
• We booked all 4 accommodations via booking.com and find the messenger via the app very handy in liaising with the owne receptionist on whether we can offload our luggage earlier or forward our luggage a few days in advance. One of them even told me that I can check in few hours earlier as the room was ready. Regardless of what platform you use, try to communicate with the accommodation prior your arrival if you are considering forwarding luggage or dropping them off before your official check in time.
• Booking multiple accommodations over a short span of time is very tiring as we are needing to worry about getting our luggage from A to B every second day but only able to check in the next place 5 - 6 hours after checking out the previous place (Most checkin starts from 3pm and checkout from 10am). Our transition days are always stressful as we don't get to do much due to the timing while handling multiple baggage so the kids are crankier.
• Rubbish/ garbage cans are mainly found on major train stations or shopping malls as well as konbinis. Most vending machines only have a recycle bin but we have plenty of disposable nappy bags which we use as rubbish bags if needed.
• We had 3 data Sims about 5GB each which was sufficient for the 9 days (navigation, Google translate, WhatsApp voice call). Free wifi is available at most places which we use whenever we need to photo dump on WhatsApp group chats or play YouTube for the kids.
• My eSim stopped working when we arrived at Kyoto from Osaka but luckily I tried rebooting my phone and it connected to the local network after. Another down side of data only Sim is there is no Japanese mobile number which can be handy (make reservations at restaurants or signing up for taxi apps to get taxi).
• We use Google Maps and Japan Travel by NAVITIME App to plan our overall route each day, public transit details is quite clear via Google Maps with several options for different J metro/ bus lines. While Japan Travel App is able to approximate cost of taxi which was useful for comparison.
• For translation, we used DeepL app when we wanted to converse with someone in Japanese and Google Translate for written Japanese translation via the camera.
• In Osaka, getting around via JR and Metro is optimal in terms of time and cost; In Kyoto, buses are more readily available but be prepared to stand shoulder to shoulder as the buses are not big and averages around 30 - 50 people. We recommend a taxi if travelling a short distance (<10 minutes) for a family that can fit into a single car.
• You can forward luggage at your hotel or local 7 eleven via Yamato transport within Osaka.
• The Jikan refreshing legs patch worked well for me but my wife got woken up few times as her feet felt cold due to the cooling effect. We got some heat patches the next day and it worked better for her.
• A few Japanese phrases go along way and perhaps it's why we mostly get friendly responses (arigato gozaimas, ohaiyo, konnichiwa, kore onegaishimas, doitashi mashite, hitotsu onegaishimas, daijorbudes, kodomo).
• The basement level of most department stores/ shopping malls sells a variety of package deserts and often a bakery opened till 8pm where we sometimes go to after dinner to get brekky for the next morning.
• Some malls have an express lift (stops only at 1F and 10F) and it may be quicker to use those in combination with escalators to get to the level you like quickly.
• Coin lockers are found is almost every major attraction and JR station but finding a large one that is available can be challenging so allow extra time. Most coin lockers only take 100 yen coins with the exception of newer ones which also takes IC cards as payment.
• Some food courts have drinkable water for you to refill your bottles but otherwise vending machines and konbinis will quench your hydration needs (the peach drink is pretty addictive).
• Other than Booking.com, Google maps, Google Translate, DeepL and Japan Travel by NAVITIME, we didn't really used the other apps we downloaded before hand but you might find a use for them: Mamamap, NERV, Ecbo cloak, Klook.

Child related tips

• Younger kids take awhile to acclimatize to a foreign environment and our kids were more lethargic than they normally are during the day, sometimes needing 2 naps instead of 1 so be prepared to adjust your plans and skip over some places that were catered specifically for them if needed.
• Google maps only tells you the distance to get you from Point A to Point B horizontally. Unfortunately it doesn't consider the routes involving travelling multiple floors to avoid heavy traffic even with wheelchair access enabled. For instance you can go across Tenshiba Garden from JR Tennoji via the overhead bridge (not ideal as the route is longer with a stroller) or underground (best with a stroller but unfortunately Google Maps doesn't show this route and we stumble across it by chance).
• Google maps navigation over multiple floors is also not very accurate but the local directory maps are very informative so take extra time to study it and find the nearest access (parents room, lift or exit to above ground/ underground).
• The lift (singular as most train station platforms only share one lift unless it's a major one like Osaka/ Kyoto etc), are often located at one end of the platform so allow additional 15 - 20 minutes when travelling with strollers or luggage.
• Most department stores/ shopping malls (Daimaru etc) have a floor suitable for kids with toy samples for playing and sometimes even a free play area (Bornelund).
• Our kids love the Butaman from Horai and we probably purchased from 5 different stores throughout the trip (they are located at almost every major station and department store). Find something that works for your kids that can be found readily (7-11, family mart, Lawson's, daily Yamazaki etc) as back up when they didn't want to eat where you were dining at or if they fell asleep and skipped a meal.
• 100 yen stores (Daiso, 3 coins, Seria, Can*Do, Watts) have plenty of cheap kid activities (e.g. sticker books, puzzles, bubble wand etc) that can entertain them throughout the day/ in restaurants/ in the showe in the accommodation before bed etc.
• Paid Attractions in Kansai that are worthwhile if your kids are under 5 (6 and above may be charged separately): Tennoji Zoo, Abeno Harukas 300, Kyoto Railway Museum, Osaka Kaiyukan, Tempozan Ferris Wheel.
• Other brekky alternatives that we liked apart from konbinis/ bakeries were MOS burgers and Doutor coffee. Gyudons (sukiya, matsuya, yoshinoya) morning menu was a bit too heavy for our kids and other options we would have tried were too far from where we stayed (Tully's, McDonalds, KoHiKan).
• Some places require you order a main meal per adult but we are small eaters so we make sure what we ordered was something our kids might eat (not spicy etc).
• Tabelog is useful to tell you the size of the restaurant and we avoided anywhere that seats less than 20 people to save time.
• We tried to eat at a restaurant for lunch and dinner the first few days but actually realize the kids enjoy munching on small eats from konbinis/ street vendors more than a casual sit down meal so we were a bit more spontaneous the second half of the trip.
• Watch out for deer poo at Nara especially when pushing your stroller! Most of the deer are quite friendly and let you pet them but don't touch their tail area as they can get defensive. If your kids are feeding away the crackers too quickly, break them in half so you have more 'ammunition'.
• Metro and JR Trains (including limited express ones) stop for less than 10 seconds. Please remember to unlock your stroller when you are approaching your next stop and prepare to jump out.

Finally got around sharing our wonderful experience in Kansai (1 Apr 2024 - 10 Apr 2024). We are a family of 4 from Perth, Australia (1 x Toddler turning 4 end of this month and 1 x Infant about 18 months old) joined by my MIL from Malaysia. It was our first time trip to Japan but the second time flying 6 hours long with 2 kids. We chose to travel during this period as it was during Easter holidays and also the most favourable weather for our kids. As we have 4 separate accommodations booked over 9 days, we try to travel as light as possible: 2 x large suitcase, 1 x medium suitcase, 2 x medium bags, 1 x bag pack, 1 x dedicated bag for infant carrier and kids' jumpers + 1 stroller. Our kids still take nap(s) during the day and our plan was having the toddler sleep on the stroller and the infant in the carrier or the stroller if toddler is not using.
After extensive research (mostly from this sub) we still found the first few days to be quite hectic and wish we know some of the things beforehand (listed below the itinerary). I hope this post can help young families who are considering travelling to Japan with kids or those who have travelled to Japan before kids came to the picture to do it again with confidence.

9 Day Itinerary (1 Apr 2024 - 10 Apr 2024)

Day 1 Osaka: Namba (Monday)
Our flight from KUL arrived KIX around 10am and boarded the Nankai Rapid (bought 1 month prior online) to Shin-Imamiya station after getting our luggage. We originally planned to take a taxi from there but failed to find any taxi for 20 mins so we end up walking to our accommodation as the kids were tired of waiting. After offloading our luggage we manage to hail a taxi and head to Namba Parks to rest and unwind. Had a refreshing lunch at Yasaiya Mei (mains + all you can eat side dishes including veg tempura) and went to explore the rooftop parks garden before putting the kids to nap. After the kids woke up we took a taxi back to check in officially. Everyone was quite tired thus we opted to stay in and get dinner from Life supermarket nearby. This was probably the most enjoyable part of the day for the kids wandering around a foreign supermarket as we bought dinner and some light snacks. After putting the kids to bed, we did some laundry and packed our 1st luggage to send away.
Day 2 Osaka: Tennoji (Tuesday)
While everyone was getting ready, I went to the nearby 7-Eleven to forward our 1st luggage to the 4th accommodation via Yamato transport. The shop attendant was helpful and guided me through the process as we communicated via deepL. We walked to the Lawson's at JR Imamiya to get brekkky before taking the Osaka loop Line to JR tennoji. We took quite a while to navigate towards Tennoji Zoo from JR Tennoji but eventually got there after a 15 min detour. It was quite crowded for a Tuesday morning but the kids get to roam around the Tenshiba garden while I queue up for tickets (500 yen per adult). One of the kids fell asleep in the zoo so we decided to just grab food to go at the supermarket outside the zoo for lunch. We then head towards Abeno Q's mall to shop and put the other kid to sleep. There was quite a lot of hot food along the way and we manage to grab some for the kids to snack on after their nap (butaman from Horai 555, mochi donut from Mister Donut, taiyaki etc). There's a fantastic area for kids to play (kid, play, study) at the ground floor with different sensory setup and soft blocks for stacking/ balancing. I spent close to 2 hours there with 2 kids while my wife and MIL went shopping. After that we had dinner at Grand Capital Toyoutei at the Kintetsu mall dining floor before heading to our final activity of the day: Abeno Harukas 300. Tickets were a bit steep (2000 yen per adult) but we end up staying there for quite a bit and the experience was pretty unique even though we missed the sunset timing. The elevator ride to the top though short left quite an impression. The kids enjoyed running around at the sky garden 2 floors below as we rest and enjoy the night view of the city from about 300m above ground. The journey back to our accommodation was pretty straightforward and the kids got knocked out when we got home. All in all Tennoji was a pleasantly great experience and we have a better understanding about JR station layout and navigating underground.
Day 3 Osaka - Kyoto (Wednesday)
This was a rather hectic day as it rained quite a bit and we struggled to get a taxi after checking out, getting turned down by several taxis with "空车". We eventually found one to bring us to JR Osaka station. Navigating at the station wasn't too difficult after yesterday but there were long queues when we arrived at 10am and I made the fatal mistake of leaving my physical credit card back in Perth and spent 45mins trying to redeem limited express tickets I reserved online. The JR staff were friendly and tried their best to help but they can only recommend me cancelling my initial reservation and buying new tickets (cancellation fee was about 2300 yen for 3 adults). As soon as we got our tickets we sprinted to the underground gate about 15 mins walk away. I even carried the stroller and kids through an escalator as we didn't want to waste time finding a lift and risk missing the train. We managed to board the limited express train on time and arrived at JR Kyoto which was even more crowded and larger than most international airports. The kids were quite cranky by now as it has been all rush and long waits since they woke up. I split up with my family with 2 luggage that we initially planned to forward to our Arashiyama accommodation via Sagawa. However I was told same day delivery service is only applicable to limited hotels so I stored the luggage at 2 coin lockers and then head to the Kintetsu line ticket counter to redeem the Kyoto-Nara and Nara-Osaka limited express tickets which fortunately doesn't require my credit card details (just reservation number). By the time I reunite with my family it was still raining and both kids fell asleep so we ditched the plan for Kyoto railway museum and instead went browsing for lunch at Porta and Isetan dining floor. We eventually queued to eat at Ejuan for about 25 minutes while one of the kid was still asleep. The wait was worthwhile as the grilled miso black cod was exceptional as was the kids' grilled chicken. Next we went to the skywalk at level 9 briefly before my family went to the toy section at Isetan while I retrieve our luggage from the coin lockers. We board the Saga line bound for Saga-Arashiyama and rested awhile at the accommodation before heading out for dinner after the rain stopped. We walked to Kijurou and fortunately they have space for us provided we order a main meal per adult. The yakiniku and Wagyu rib loin bowls were pretty good but we find the Hitsumabushi set a bit gimmicky. After dinner we stopped by Kimono Forest on our way back and this was probably the highlight of the kids day.
Day 4 Kyoto: Arashiyama (Thursday)
Had Lawson's for brekky before heading out to Kimono Rental Amuya to hired kimonos for my wife and toddler including hairstyling. The shop was actually a house with the living area turned into a studio and only the owner working by herself so we waited for about half an hour before walking towards the Bamboo Forest and Tenryu-ji gardens (500 yen entry from the north gate but well worth it for the blooming sakura and picturesque lake). It was crowded as expected and everyone was moving slowly so it took us about an hour to complete the loop back to the main tourist strip. We then had Udon for lunch at Ozuru, the chewy noodles were complemented by the broth which was a lot more flavourful than the kitsune Udon we are accustomed to back in Perth. After lunch we head home to put the kids to nap before venturing out in the evening towards Togetsukyo Bridge overlooking the pristine Katsura river flowing gracefully from Mt Arashi in the backdrop. The view was breathtaking and we crossed over to Arashiyama park where the kids had a great time running around free range. As the sun was setting, we head back to the town centre, took a novelty Randen ride and grab some food (Naruse's Unagi, Upit's Burger) en route to our accommodation to eat in before calling it a day.
Day 5 Kyoto (Friday)
After checking out we took the Saga line to JR Kyoto station and forwarded the medium sized luggage to the 4th accommodation in Osaka using Crosta. We then did some light shopping at Yodabashi Camera Kyoto as my MIL shoes had kick the bucket and we needed a replacement. Manage to sneak in the only ramen meal of the trip at Ramen Chabuton located upstairs. It was a fairly small shop but we were lucky to get a table just before the Friday lunch rush hour and our ramen cravings were thoroughly satiated. We put the kids down for a quick nap as we make our way back to JR Kyoto to take the Saga line towards Kyoto railway museum. This is an underrated attraction with so much to do and we could have spent the whole day here if I knew they had coin lockers. There were many interactive and educational displays relating to train components in addition to multiple play areas upstairs as well as an outdoor playground! There's also a mockup ticket gate for kids to learn how to purchase a ticket and pass through the gate. Our kids loved the ball pit, toy train area and large train simulator. We couldn't squeeze enough time to explore the 3rd floor or watch the diorama presentation or board the Steam Locomotive as it was getting late. We took a taxi to check-in at Kamoya Ryokan before taking the bus to Nishiki Market for dinner. It's about 6pm and most of the shops were shutting and the remaining ones that are open had queues building up quickly. We ended up waiting 30 mins to eat sushi at Sushi Say. There's a limited range of cooked food including skewers which we got for our kids while we share a nigiri platter and sashimi. After dinner we went to the basement of Daimaru Kyoto across the road to get some baked goods for brekky before taking the taxi home to crash.
Day 6 Kyoto (Saturday)
My MIL wanted to take it easy and explore the area at her own pace so we had a more spontaneous day. After brekky, we took the bus to Yasaka Shrine and started our trek towards Heian Jingu, stopping along the way to enjoy the blossoming park and munching on food from street vendors. We paid to enter the shrine garden (600 yen per adult) which was very worth it for a 30 minute stroll and escape from the bustling crowd outside. We grab some food to eat from the street vendors as one of the kid slept and then head to the playground across the road (Wagener Square) and spent a good 30 minutes there even though it was a bit basic (Perth is blessed with many great playgrounds). Once both kids are feeling refreshed we felt adventurous and took the bus to attempt the hike up Kiyomizu-dera. Since its a Saturday, the Sannenzaka path was packed with phenomenal crowds with the occasional car coming through and splitting the crowd apart. I carried the infant to sleep while my wife push our toddler on the stroller as we slowly make our way up, stopping by for a nice matcha latte and softserve at Here cafe to recharge. We eventually reached the base of the temple after 30 minutes and decided against entering due to the massive crowds (& stairs!). On the way down we reached the fork that branches into Ninenzaka and thought we try giving it a go. There were a lot more stairs over this side and we had to carry the stroller through the steps while waiting for the crowd to advance before us. As physically draining as it was, we felt a sense of achievement as we manage to snap a photo with the iconic Hokanji temple. We took the bus home after that and had an enjoyable dinner at Okonomiyaki Yoshino next door before an early night to recover.
Day 7 Kyoto - Nara - Osaka (Sunday)
We had some leftover food for brekky before checking out and heading to JR Kyoto via taxi. We head to the Kintetsu line and boarded the Vistacar limited express train to Nara. I've booked for the private room down stairs which was pretty spacious for the 5 of us and our luggage. After arriving at Kintetsu-Nara station, we took the 100 yen tourist bus to the famous Nara Deer Park and started exploring the area. There were plenty of deer roaming throughout/ resting on the ground and several vendors at the entrance selling deer crackers. After the kids were done feeding 2 sets of crackers, we head to Mizuya Chaya for lunch. There were limited seating so we sat by the side and ate with the bowl in our hands while feeding the kids. Probably the best Udon we had in our lives (level above Ozuru in Arashiyama and Hifumiya in Perth). Time for a nap so we put the kids down while making our way to have a closer look at Todaiji temple as there were too many stairs to Kasuga-taisha and we have yet to recover. We had our first Cremia here and it was amazing. After the kids woke up we took the bus back to Kintetsu-Nara station and explored the nearby street while waiting for our train. We then boarded the HINOTORI limited express bound for Osaka. While walking towards the hotel to check in, we were passing by Dotombori and opted to have a quick dinner and call it a day rather than coming out again after checking in and offloading our luggage. We ended up having curry at Hariju Dotombori Curry shop which taste d like a homely nourishing meal. After dinner we took the taxi to the hotel and fortunately our 2 other luggage that we forwarded days before are waiting for us to collect. Did some repacking and also laundry at a nearby laundromat before sleep.
Day 8 Osaka: Osaka Bay Area (Monday)
Started the day with brekky at MOS Burger just outside our hotel before taking the metro train to Osaka Bay Area. There were plenty to see as we approach the Kaiyukan, large LEGO animal displays, the large ferris wheel and Disney characters. The ticketing and entry time is staggered which is a good idea to control the amount of crowds going in and out. I started queueing at 1035am and got entry for 11am which was fair (opted not to book timeslot online as it can be unpredictable with kids and public transit) but we didn't felt like its a long wait as the kids were running around and enjoying the ocean view. The entry also have a photographer stationed to take a family polaroid with a whale shark replica for FREE. We were impressed with the aquarium's efficient layout where some prominent displays (Whale Shark, Seals etc) span across multiple floors so you can still enjoy them later on if you missed it earlier due to the crowds. Apart from sea creatures there are also Arctic mammals and birds (Puffins) from all over the world. The kids were over stimulated by lunch time so we head to the food court at Tempozan Market Place to refuel. After lunch we took the kids for a ferris wheel ride before putting both to sleep while we make our way to Shinsaibashisuji Shopping Street via metro line. As the kids were still asleep, I rested at Daimaru with my MIL while my wife went shopping. This turn out to be a fantastic place with a floor dedicated for kids (Pokemon centre, Pokemon cafe, BorneLund mini play area with many display toys available for sampling). The kids spent the rest of the day here after they woke up and we had dinner at the dining floor. There were queues everywhere and we chose to wait at Aozora Blue as they offer udon made with a higher wheat ratio here. Regrettably the kids didn't enjoy as much and prefer regular ones that we are used to. After dinner we took away cheescake from Rikuro for dessert back at our hotel. I made sure to online check in our flights before I go to bed.
Day 9 Osaka: Dotombori (Tuesday)
Our final day in Japan and we chose to do some shopping and take it easy. Tried Doutor Coffee for brekky (took a while to find as it was underground) before walking to Don Quijote at Dotombori. There's 6 floors crammed with various items: snacks, electronics, clothing, non prescription medication, toys, collectibles as well as a functional ferris wheel (operates after 2pm). That being said the kids got bored after awhile and didn't really enjoy much as there wasn't much space to move around. I brought them out to stroll around the Ebisu-bashi Bridge while my wife and MIL continue their haul. It was certainly a sight to behold: countless amount of large LCD screens with surround sound on full blast from every high rise building, street buskers vying for attention from crowds that were constantly on the move, tourists taking selfies in front of the iconic Glicoman. Sadly it started to drizzle so I quickly entered the Shinsaibashisuji Shopping Street undercover area and look for a place to have lunch. I stumbled across a Yoshinoya & Hanamaru joint food hall which was bustling with both locals and foreigners. You have to order and get your food from the counter before you can occupy a table so I waited for my wife and MIL to arrive before we start queueing up. We had the gyudon and beef Udon with onsen egg along with chicken karaage and tempura. There's also a condiment station with toppings to complement your udon as well as free tea and water. Everything was very affordable and best of all we didn't had to wait long. After lunch my wife continuing shopping while we head to Daimaru for the kids to have a nap and play afterwards. I noticed there's a bridge that connects each floor to the Parco next door and discovered a unique floor full of pop culture themed stores including a studio Ghibli store featuring Totoro and No-Face displays, a 2 ft tall Godzilla, Ultraman, Capcom superstore, Sanrio (Hello Kitty), Snoopy, Rilakkuma and also a LEGO store. The kids had a great time browsing and also playing with LEGO before my wife reunites with us. As it's nearing dinner time, I thought we try our luck getting a table at Ganko Dotombori and make our way towards Ebisu-bashi Bridge. The view here is even more spectacular at night with the contrasting lights as well as numerous LCD displays illuminating the area. Unfortunately there's a lengthy wait at Ganko and our party voted for street food instead which turn out surprising well. Kids devoured a dozen gyozas while we had takoyaki, kobe beef nigiri, yakitori and yakiniku skewers as we strolled along the street. It was still early so we made a detour towards Hozenji before walking back the hotel. Then we stumbled upon an arcade (Amuse Factory AXE) which naturally drawn the kids in, we got popcorn from a vending machine there and it was enough to keep the kids happy on our trek back. Before taking our last sleep in Japan, we organized our luggage and get them ready for check out the next day.
Day 10 Osaka: Sayonara (Wednesday)
Checked out of the hotel and took a private airport taxi to KIX. Had brekky at McD and Lawsons and surprised to find that the food here costs the same as outside (e.g. McD/ Hungry Jacks at Malaysian/ Australian airports cost more than the metro/ suburban outlets). Boarded the flight and bid Japan farewell for now while soaking in the surreal time we had.
List of accommodations for 3 adults and 1 child + 1 infant/ toddler
1. Orange House 701 (22,500 yen for 2 nights) 10/10
Location is not bad in a quiet area South of the bustling Dotombori area with Konbinis and JR Imamiya within walking distance. Washing machine, shower and stove took some time to figure out and my kid accidentally turned on the stove but luckily there's a safety button. Overall a brilliant accommodation at an affordable price and will consider returning if we come back to Osaka with kids.
2. Arashiyama bamboo guest house (55,650 yen for 2 nights + 1200 yen tax) 8/10
Prime location 1 min away from JR station, Lawson and walking distances to the local tourist strip, Bamboo Grove, Tenryu-ji and Togetsukyo Bridge. However the room is located on the 3rd floor with no lift so it can be a challenge for kids and older folk. The owner was kind enough to carry our 2 X 20kg luggage up and speaks a little English. The stay was rather comfortable even with futons to sleep on while my MIL slept on one of the single beds. We are unlikely returning to Arashiyama but would recommend this place if it suits your budget.
3. Kamoya Ryokan (35,400 yen for 2 nights + 2000 yen tax) 7.5/10
Not as central as the other accommodations but still within 10 mins walking distance to JR and bus lines. This is a shared accommodation so fridge, microwave and hot/ cold water is in the common area but we have a private bathroom to use. There are no beds so we all slept side by side on futons in the same room. For some reason kids are also taxed to stay a night here (200 yen) but the host was super friendly, spoke a bit of basic English and helped us with ordering a taxi when we checked out. For the price this is not a bad place for short term stay if cosleeping on futons together as a family is acceptable. Bonus: the okonomiyaki place next door is quite good albeit requiring a bit more effort to communicate but is worth it as plenty of locals seem to frequent there and our kids love the yakisoba.
4. Best Western Hotel Fino Osaka Shinsaibashi (40,450 yen for 3 nights) 8/10
Functional hotel relatively close to Shinsaibashi shopping street and Dotombori. 1 min walk away from Osaka metro station and 7 Eleven. There's also a 24 hour laundromat 5 mins walk away. Facilities are bare minimal but gets the job done as we only needed the place to crash and freshen up since there's a lot of shopping and remaining sightseeing to be done. All reception staff spoke English well and check in/ out was rather smooth. I would consider staying again if the rooms were larger but can't complain at this price point and location.
List of eateries we consider returning

• Yasaiya Mei
• Ejuan
• Kijurou
• Ozuru
• Upit's Burger
• Ramen Chabuton
• Okonomiyaki Yoshino
• Mizuya Chaya
• Yoshinoya & Hanamaru

Highlight of each day for the kids

1. Wandering around Life supermarket and exploring a new accommodation
2. Running around 300m above ground at the Abeno Harukas sky garden while having fruits/ snacks in between
3. Visiting Kimono Forest after dinner, watching the randen pass by at the crossing
4. Running around at Arashiyama park and watching the majestic Katsura river flowing rapidly
5. The outdoor playground at Kyoto railway museum among many other fun things there
6. The playground at Wagener Square across Heian Jingu
7. Interacting with deer and eating udon outdoors
8. Seeing different sea animals up close and ferris wheel ride after
9. Making friends at BorneLund and having imaginary play together despite the language barrier

Lessons learned (not in chronological order)

General tips

• We prepared about 160,000 yen cash before arriving at Japan but also have money via 1 x transfer wise debit card (digital), 1 x Westpac credit card (digital), 1 x ING debit card (physical). We ended up withdrawing a further 200,000 yen worth of cash. We opted not to bring any AUD as the rate is quite poor in Japan since most would prefer foreign exchangers would prefer USD.
• We didn't get to use our digital cards as most places in Kansai (Kanto might be different) that offer card payments still requires a physical card to read the chip.
• Please remember to bring the physical card of the credit card used for any online booking to avoid the stress I endured on day 3.
• We booked all the transit tickets online about a month prior and find it worthwhile rather than spending 15 - 30 mins in queue at the ticket counters. The limited express tickets go crazy fast and I recommend booking them the hour they become available (1 month prior your transit date and as soon as it is open in Japan time).
• We booked all 4 accommodations via booking.com and find the messenger via the app very handy in liaising with the owne receptionist on whether we can offload our luggage earlier or forward our luggage a few days in advance. One of them even told me that I can check in few hours earlier as the room was ready. Regardless of what platform you use, try to communicate with the accommodation prior your arrival if you are considering forwarding luggage or dropping them off before your official check in time.
• Booking multiple accommodations over a short span of time is very tiring as we are needing to worry about getting our luggage from A to B every second day but only able to check in the next place 5 - 6 hours after checking out the previous place (Most checkin starts from 3pm and checkout from 10am). Our transition days are always stressful as we don't get to do much due to the timing while handling multiple baggage so the kids are crankier.
• Rubbish/ garbage cans are mainly found on major train stations or shopping malls as well as konbinis. Most vending machines only have a recycle bin but we have plenty of disposable nappy bags which we use as rubbish bags if needed.
• We had 3 data Sims about 5GB each which was sufficient for the 9 days (navigation, Google translate, WhatsApp voice call). Free wifi is available at most places which we use whenever we need to photo dump on WhatsApp group chats or play YouTube for the kids.
• My eSim stopped working when we arrived at Kyoto from Osaka but luckily I tried rebooting my phone and it connected to the local network after. Another down side of data only Sim is there is no Japanese mobile number which can be handy (make reservations at restaurants or signing up for taxi apps to get taxi).
• We use Google Maps and Japan Travel by NAVITIME App to plan our overall route each day, public transit details is quite clear via Google Maps with several options for different J metro/ bus lines. While Japan Travel App is able to approximate cost of taxi which was useful for comparison.
• For translation, we used DeepL app when we wanted to converse with someone in Japanese and Google Translate for written Japanese translation via the camera.
• In Osaka, getting around via JR and Metro is optimal in terms of time and cost; In Kyoto, buses are more readily available but be prepared to stand shoulder to shoulder as the buses are not big and averages around 30 - 50 people. We recommend a taxi if travelling a short distance (<10 minutes) for a family that can fit into a single car.
• You can forward luggage at your hotel or local 7 eleven via Yamato transport within Osaka.
• The Jikan refreshing legs patch worked well for me but my wife got woken up few times as her feet felt cold due to the cooling effect. We got some heat patches the next day and it worked better for her.
• A few Japanese phrases go along way and perhaps it's why we mostly get friendly responses (arigato gozaimas, ohaiyo, konnichiwa, kore onegaishimas, doitashi mashite, hitotsu onegaishimas, daijorbudes, kodomo).
• The basement level of most department stores/ shopping malls sells a variety of package deserts and often a bakery opened till 8pm where we sometimes go to after dinner to get brekky for the next morning.
• Some malls have an express lift (stops only at 1F and 10F) and it may be quicker to use those in combination with escalators to get to the level you like quickly.
• Coin lockers are found is almost every major attraction and JR station but finding a large one that is available can be challenging so allow extra time. Most coin lockers only take 100 yen coins with the exception of newer ones which also takes IC cards as payment.
• Some food courts have drinkable water for you to refill your bottles but otherwise vending machines and konbinis will quench your hydration needs (the peach drink is pretty addictive).
• Other than Booking.com, Google maps, Google Translate, DeepL and Japan Travel by NAVITIME, we didn't really used the other apps we downloaded before hand but you might find a use for them: Mamamap, NERV, Ecbo cloak, Klook.

Child related tips

• Younger kids take awhile to acclimatize to a foreign environment and our kids were more lethargic than they normally are during the day, sometimes needing 2 naps instead of 1 so be prepared to adjust your plans and skip over some places that were catered specifically for them if needed.
• Google maps only tells you the distance to get you from Point A to Point B horizontally. Unfortunately it doesn't consider the routes involving travelling multiple floors to avoid heavy traffic even with wheelchair access enabled. For instance you can go across Tenshiba Garden from JR Tennoji via the overhead bridge (not ideal as the route is longer with a stroller) or underground (best with a stroller but unfortunately Google Maps doesn't show this route and we stumble across it by chance).
• Google maps navigation over multiple floors is also not very accurate but the local directory maps are very informative so take extra time to study it and find the nearest access (parents room, lift or exit to above ground/ underground).
• The lift (singular as most train station platforms only share one lift unless it's a major one like Osaka/ Kyoto etc), are often located at one end of the platform so allow additional 15 - 20 minutes when travelling with strollers or luggage.
• Most department stores/ shopping malls (Daimaru etc) have a floor suitable for kids with toy samples for playing and sometimes even a free play area (Bornelund).
• Our kids love the Butaman from Horai and we probably purchased from 5 different stores throughout the trip (they are located at almost every major station and department store). Find something that works for your kids that can be found readily (7-11, family mart, Lawson's, daily Yamazaki etc) as back up when they didn't want to eat where you were dining at or if they fell asleep and skipped a meal.
• 100 yen stores (Daiso, 3 coins, Seria, Can*Do, Watts) have plenty of cheap kid activities (e.g. sticker books, puzzles, bubble wand etc) that can entertain them throughout the day/ in restaurants/ in the showe in the accommodation before bed etc.
• Paid Attractions in Kansai that are worthwhile if your kids are under 5 (6 and above may be charged separately): Tennoji Zoo, Abeno Harukas 300, Kyoto Railway Museum, Osaka Kaiyukan, Tempozan Ferris Wheel.
• Other brekky alternatives that we liked apart from konbinis/ bakeries were MOS burgers and Doutor coffee. Gyudons (sukiya, matsuya, yoshinoya) morning menu was a bit too heavy for our kids and other options we would have tried were too far from where we stayed (Tully's, McDonalds, KoHiKan).
• Some places require you order a main meal per adult but we are small eaters so we make sure what we ordered was something our kids might eat (not spicy etc).
• Tabelog is useful to tell you the size of the restaurant and we avoided anywhere that seats less than 20 people to save time.
• We tried to eat at a restaurant for lunch and dinner the first few days but actually realize the kids enjoy munching on small eats from konbinis/ street vendors more than a casual sit down meal so we were a bit more spontaneous the second half of the trip.
• Watch out for deer poo at Nara especially when pushing your stroller! Most of the deer are quite friendly and let you pet them but don't touch their tail area as they can get defensive. If your kids are feeding away the crackers too quickly, break them in half so you have more 'ammunition'.
• Metro and JR Trains (including limited express ones) stop for less than 10 seconds. Please remember to unlock your stroller when you are approaching your next stop and prepare to jump out.

(As always, flyers are out Wednesdays, most store sales for the new flyer start on Thursdays)
Adonis

• Chicken breast (boneless skinless) - $5.99 per lb -- Fair price for chicken breast and a common price at Adonis. Lower is definitely possible, where $4.50/lb is a "best target".
• Chicken legs - $2.49 per lb -- Fair price for chicken legs and a common price at Adonis. The stock-up price target is about $1.50/lb.
• Fresh Sea Bass (free cleaning) - $6.88 per lb -- Nice! Fresh fish!
• Red Sea Bream (free cleaning) - $9.99 per lb -- Ohh, more bream this week! Nice to see!
• Shrimp skewers - $0.99 each -- Ad is a little unclear, but if these are 99c a skewer, that ain't bad!
• Red vine tomatoes - $0.99 per lb -- Excellent price for tomatoes!
• Flat cabbage - $0.99 per lb -- Good price for cabbage.
• Cucumber - $0.99 each -- Great price for a cucumber, but watch out for other deals.
• Blueberries - $2.99 full pint -- Good price for a full pint.
• Boursin cheese - $4.99 150g pack -- Nice!
• Jarlsberg - $9.99 300g -- Decent. We've seen Jarlsberg go as low as $2/100g.
• Camembert (Le Rustique) - $9.99 250g -- Fair price if it's really good camembert. You can score deals on soft cheeses like this that can swing that price down to about $2.50/lb, but it's rarer and rarer these days.
• Brie, triple cream (l'Extra) - $9.99 300g -- Fair price for really good brie.
• Deli - Havarti (Casetelo) - $1.99 per 100g -- Great price for havarti. Tasty stuff in a nice sandwich!
• Deli - Beef bologna (Solmaz) - $1.49 per 100g -- Cheap deli!
• Deli - Chicken breast (Alzahraa) - $1.29 per 100g -- Cheap deli!
• Deli - Turkey breast (Schneiders) - $1.99 per 100g -- Great price for medium-brand deli.
• Deli - Prosciutto (San Daniele) - $2.79 per 100g -- Great price!
• Produce Price Rating: Medium, but always has well-priced chicken, the deli meat sale rotations are always fantastic, and just the overall variety of goods is refreshing. Personal favourite store.

Farm Boy

• Atlantic Snow Crab - $7.99 per lb -- Fun seafood option. Definitely a treat, but might make for a nice dinner!
• Bacon (Leadbetter) - $3.99 375g pack -- Not the cheapest option in bacon, but it's a step up from value-brand bacon.
• Vidalia onions - $1.88 per lb -- Ouufff, that hurts my feelings. Vidalias are my favourite onion, but at nearly $2/lb when regular ones shouldn't go over 80c/lb, it's a tough one to swallow...
• Cucumber - $0.99 each -- Great price for a cucumber, but watch out for other deals.
• Deli - Black Forest Ham (Brandt) - $1.99 per 100g -- Good deal on good ham!
• Deli - Chicken breast roast (Maple Lodge) - $2.49 per 100g -- Good deal on nice deli.
• Produce Price Rating: High

Farmers Pick (can be a little late on their flyer) (https://www.farmerspick.ca/flyer-specials)
Food Basics

• Chicken breast (boneless skinless, Maple Lodge) - $4.98 per lb -- Good price for chicken breast!
• Bacon (Leadbetter) - $3.88 375g pack -- Like the Leadbetter's at Farmboy, it's step-up bacon, and it's a good sale price.
• Atlantic salmon - $10.88 per lb -- Fair price for salmon.
• Carrots - $1.25 2lb bag -- Awesome!
• Onions - $1.25 2lb bag -- Awesome!
• Broccoli - $1.25 per crown -- Great price!
• Mini cucumbers - $1.99 6-pack -- Nice! Good price!
• Apples (various) - $2.98 3lb bag -- Fair price for apples, but mind the type you buy. Some varieties bruise up easily and you could easily lose a few soldiers if not careful.
• Lemons - $2.98 2lb bag -- Fair price for lemons.
• Oranges - $1.88 3lb bag -- Great price for oranges!! That's 60c/lb!!
• Blueberries - $1.88 half pint -- Good price for blueberries. About 1.50-175 for a half-pint is good.
• Mango - $0.67 each -- Wow! Haven't seen a 67c mango in months!
• Cantaloupe - $2.98 each -- Good ol' $3 melon.
• Mini watermelon - $3.98 each -- Great price for a small watermelon!
• Corned beef (Hereford) - $2.98 340g can -- Not the most exciting ingredient, but it's good to have one or two cans in the pantry.
• SPAM - $2.98 340g can -- Same as the corned beef.
• Smoked ham (Selection) - $8.00 675g toupie -- That works out to just about 1.18/100g, which is a good rate on ham for sandwiches, or frying up for a meal.
• Tofu (Fountaine santé) - $5.00 For 2x 400g packs -- Good price for tofu. $2.50 for 400g is "nice average". If you're paying $2, it's a good deal. $3+ and you're either outside of town, or you're paying for a special brand or dessert tofu.
• Silk plant bev - $2.88 1.74-1.89L -- Excellent deal on the Silk stuff. This is commonly $4-5 per jug, Under $3 is a good deal.
• Produce Price Rating: Low to medium low

FoodLand

• Pork chops (loin cut) - $2.99 per lb -- Fair price for decent cuts of pork. Given these are boneless, you're a meat gavel away from schnitzel.
• Chicken breast (boneless skinless) - $5.88 per lb -- Fair price for chicken breast. Lower is definitely possible, where $4.50/lb is the a "best target".
• Beef cross-rib roast (AAA) - $7.99 per lb -- Fair price for beef, but not my price-point. I prefer to see at least $6/lb before I start entertain these cuts and products. Though, I'm maybe a poor judge as I'm not really a fancy steak kinda guy. But, that's also how I save tons of cash. As the saying goes, the customer is always right in matters of taste!
• Atlantic salmon - $10.99 per lb -- Fair price for salmon.
• Brick cheese (Compliments) - $5.49 400g bar -- Not the best price for cheap brick cheese, but it's ok. It's at least 50c my standard go-to rate. But Foodland isn't an "in-town" brand, so the price scales higher as you move out of dense city areas.
• Luncheon meat (Holiday) - $1.99 340g can -- I think this is similar to SPAM, but I've never had it personally.
• Produce Price Rating: Medium-high to high.

Freshco (price matcher)

• Chicken breast (boneless skinless) - $10.00 4-pack -- Marge Simpson grunts, these products are deceiving. Throw these on the scale and make sure they're at least 2lb.
• Smoked sausages (Compliments) - $7.99 900g pack -- These come in a couple of different flavours, including "bacon cheddar". Works out to $4/lb, which ain't bad. I think these are pre-cooked as well. You can score good raw sausage for about the same price or just a bit more, but it'll be much tougher to find.
• Sweet peppers - $3.99 4-pack -- Fair price. Not the best, but not the worst either.
• Hothouse tomatoes - $0.99 per lb -- Excellent price for tomatoes!
• Corn - $2.00 for 5 ears -- Excellent! 40c an ear!!!
• Celery - $2.99 per head -- Ok price for celery. Lots of places charge $4 for nice big heads of celery...
• Bok choy, Napa, Flat Cabbage - $0.99 per lb -- Amazing price for choy and napa, fair for cabbage. The other day, I made a choy salad with a little light dressing. Super tasty.
• Green onions - $0.99 per bunch -- $1/bunch is basically the new normal when it comes to green onions.
• Ginger - $1.99 per lb -- Good price. You'll often find it more in the $3/lb range.
• Garlic - $1.29 5-pack -- Nice!
• Asian pears - $1.88 per lb -- Nice! Not bad for a fancier fruit. In season, you can score these easily under 1.50/lb
• Apples (Gala) - $1.49 per lb -- Not bad for a good apple, though it's still a bit high. 1.25/lb would be the better rate. But, short of sending your kids off to school with a head of bok choy in their lunch, I don't know what we're supposed to do here...
• Brick cheese (Armstrong) - $4.44 400g bar -- Nice! Sub-$5 brick cheese!
• Silk plant bev - $3.49 1.74-1.89L -- Nice little sale price. Down from about $5 this week.
• Carole's Japanese Cheesecake - $8.88 500g cake -- All I can think of is Charlie from It's Always Sunny, in the mail room freaking out about Pepe Silvia, and how there's no Carole in HR.
• Dr Oetkey pizzas (Ristorante) - $4.49 whatever -- Dude, what happened to these?! They used to be, like, $2-2.50 in 2020.
• Produce Price Rating: medium low (more on the medium side)

Giant Tiger (*note the VIP prices; sales begin today) (price matcher)

• Chicken breast (boneless skinless) - $6.97 500-818g -- Aaahhhh boyyyy! Freakin' lotteries again. Limit of 5. Assuming there's 650g in a pack, that'S 1.5lb for $7, which is about 4.66/lb, which is good. Find a scale and check the weights!
• Bacon (Olymel) - $3.88 375g pack -- Like the Leadbetter's at Farmboy, it's step-up bacon, and it's a good sale price.
• Breakfast sausage (Olymel) - $3.88 375g pack -- Not feeling bacon, you can swap out to sausages.
• Celery - $1.88 per head -- Great price, but careful, these are often smaller heads. Two of these is about the same as one big $4 head at Basics, for example.
• Iceberg lettuce - $1.88 per head -- Good price for lettuce!
• Green onions - $1.88 per bunch -- This may sound pricey, but I found the bunches have suffered some shrinkage. Last I went to GT, these were bigger bunches. Mind your step when it comes to green onions, I guess.
• Salad kit (Dole) - $1.97 340g bag -- Great price for a salad kit. These can range easily into the $4 range. In fact, Basics has them for $4 this week. So, consider these half-price salad kits.
• Mini cucumbers - $1.97 6-pack -- Nice, $2 is a good rate. We were seeing $4 6-packs some weeks (though, I doubt we've seen the end of those days...)
• Apples (Royal Gala) - $2.88 3lb bag -- Good rate on galas. On that $1/lb target.
• Lemons - $2.88 2lb bag -- Fair price for lemons.
• Clementines - $2.88 2lb bag -- GREAT price for clementines!
• Cream cheese (Lactantia) - $2.47 250g bar -- Great price! Can often range into $4 for the same bar.
• Dr Oetkey pizzas (Ristorante) - $4.97 whatever -- What the... How did it get worse from Freshco to GT....
• Produce Price Rating: Generally on the low side.

Green Fresh Supermarket (Vanier) (check https://greenfreshottawa20.wixsite.com/greenfreshottawa) * Produce Price Rating: Usually very competitive, catering to Asian cuisine. Warning: their newest sales start on Fridays - so this is a late advertising of their sales.
IGA (price matcher)

• Lobster - $8.77 per lb -- Scene Member Price.
• Bacon (Mere Michel) - $3.99 375g pack -- More $4 mid-range-ish bacon going around.
• Greenouse tomatoes - $0.99 per lb -- Nice! Another great $1/lb tomato deal!
• Blackberries - $1.44 half pint -- Scene Member Price.
• Brick cheese (Armstrong) - $3.99 400g bar -- Awesome!
• Dr Oetkey pizzas (Ristorante) - $3.47 whatever -- Bon, criss! And even then it's still too pricey for show shitty these pizzas are. What's a walk-in special at a pizza place these days?
• Produce Price Rating: Medium

Independent

• Beef brisket - $4.99 per lb -- Awesome price for beef brisket.
• Chicken breast or thighs (boneless skinless) - $4.99 per lb -- Good price. Go for the chicken and get out.
• Pork tenderloin - $3.49 per lb -- Fair price for tenderloin.
• Avocado - $2.49 each -- You know, you wanna give them the benefit of the doubt, but at 2.50 for an avocado, it better be big enough to kill a man, whether eaten or via bludgeoning.
• Blueberries - $2.77 full pint -- Awesome price!
• Brick cheese (Black Diamond) - $4.88 400g bar -- Sub-$5 cheese is always welcome.
• Produce Price Rating: fairly high with few exceptions

Loblaws

• Pork tenderloin - $3.49 per lb -- Fair price for tenderloin.
• Asparagus - $2.99 per lb -- Not bad for asparagus. We've seen better, but it's also not $4/lb we can commonly see.
• Salad Kits (PC) - $11.00 for 2 300g-ish -- We had mentioned earlier that GT has Dole-branded kits, same size, for $2. At $2, Dole could spit in my salad, and I still wouldn't look at these PC kits.
• Bok choy - $2.99 per lb -- Freshco has theirs for 99c/lb.
• Strawberries - $1.99 454g shell -- Awesome price for strawberries! Let's hope the quality is there. Sometimes cheap is cheap for a reason.
• Brick cheese (Black Diamond) - $4.88 400g bar -- Sub-$5 cheese is always welcome.
• Produce Price Rating: fairly high with few exceptions

Provigo

• Atlantic Lobster (live) - $7.99 per lb -- Good price on lobster.
• Beef striploin steak - $7.88 per lb -- Good price on steak, but no indication of the grade.
• Chicken legs - $2.49 per lb -- Faiaverage price for chicken legs. Same as Adonis.
• Strawberries - $2.44 454g shell -- Not as good as the 1.99 deal, but still quite good.
• Brick cheese (Ptit Quebec) - $4.88 400g bar -- Sub-$5 cheese is always welcome. Took some digging, but I found out that it's the same owners as those of Cracker Barrel, hence the easy-same-price swap between Provigo and Loblaws.
• Produce Price Rating: fairly high with few exceptions

Maxi (price matcher)

• Whole chicken - $1.99 per lb -- Awesome price for chicken! Learn to carve up a chicken. There's real savings there!
• Pork chops - $2.88 per lb -- Fair price for pork chops.
• Atlantic Salmon - $8.99 per lb -- Good price for salmon, under that $10/lb target.
• Small potatoes (Yellow, Russet) - $0.94 3lb bag -- Wow! 31c/lb! That's really good!
• Celery - $2.49 per head -- Good price for celery. Let's hope the heads are big and nice, and not "size-scaled according to price".
• Beefsteak tomatoes - $1.49 per lb -- Good price for tomatoes, but we're seeing some $1/lb sales. But if the quality is there, don't hesitate.
• Sweet peppers (green and red) - $3.99 4-pack -- Fair going price for peppers.
• Blueberries - $1.87 full pint -- WOW! Insanely good price for blueberries.
• Apples (Imperfect) - $6.00 6lb bag -- But is it 6lb?! Weigh the bag on a scale and check. Too much funny business in the fixed-weight products lately.
• Brick cheese (Ptit Quebec) - $4.87 400g bar -- Sub-$5 cheese is always welcome. Took some digging, but I found out that it's the same owners as those of Cracker Barrel, hence the easy-same-price swap between Provigo and Loblaws.
• Flour (Five Roses, Robinhood) - $13.99 10kg bag -- Hmm, these bags have seen a small increase from $11-12...
• Dry pasta (Primo) - $1.33 750g packs -- Great price! Stock-up a little!
• Produce Price Rating: Generally medium low pricing! This store can post some impressive deals at times.

Metro

• Beef prime rib roast and steaks (AA) - $8.99 per lb -- I want to like this sale. It's prime rib, which is a nice cut, but I wish it was AAA grade. Best go in with options in mind, and make your decision when you see the meat. Give it a poke, check the fat lines, make sure it's going to be nice and tender.
• Pork loin chops or roast - $2.99 per lb -- If the beef doesn't look good, you've got a pork parachute.
• Chicken breast and thighs (boneless skinless, Prime) - $5.99 per lb -- Not the best price, but definitely a little lower than regular.
• Strawberries - $1.99 454g shell -- Awesome price for strawberries! Again, always mind the quality at these prices.
• Burrata - $20.00 2x 250g balls -- This cheese is stupendous. It's a treat and priced accordingly, but worth trying. Think of super-fresh mozz balls or fior de latte, but with a mozz-cottage-cheese thing going on inside.
• Dr Oetkey pizzas (Ristorante) - $3.49 whatever -- How is it that we go from $5 for these, to $3.50... That's such a huge swing...
• Produce Price Rating: High. Kinda like Sobeys. You can see a 50% average mark-up compared to a lot of other stores. It's nice produce, but it costs you.

No Frills (price matcher)

• Chicken drumsticks - $1.87 per lb -- Good enough price for chicken drumsticks. I'd rather see legs at this price, but this is fair.
• Smoked sausages (No Name) - $6.99 900g pack -- Goodness these look a LOT like the Compliments bag at Freshco lol...
• Peameal bacon - $2.88 per lb -- Interesting. Sometimes it's hard to find peameal for less than $4. Meanwhile, I've never bought the stuff, and I don't think I've seen many put it in their cart. I don't get it lol.
• Atlantic Salmon - $9.77 per lb -- On that $10/lb target.
• Corn - $0.33 per ear -- Great price for ears of corn!!
• Potatoes (Red, Yellow, Russet) - $4.99 10lb bag -- Fair sale price for potatoes. Regular prices can float easily over $7 now...
• Blueberries - $1.99 full pint -- Another fantastic blueberry sale!
• Pears (Bartlett) - $0.88 per lb -- Awesome price for pears!!!
• Milk (Neilson) - $4.88 4L bagged -- Great sale price on milk considering it's about $6-7 at the very least.
• Canned tuna (Ocean's) - $0.99 170g -- There's some funny business in the flyer this week. There's, like, 3 different cans of tuna. This one for 99c, a Clover Leaf for 2.99, and another Ocean's for 2.99.
• Produce Price Rating: Generally quite low, selectively amazing for some items.

Produce Depot (usually a little late on the flyer) https://producedepot.ca/

• Ground beef (medium) - $4.99 per lb -- Not bad. Not a stock-up price, but this would be good burger material.
• Beef top sirloin steak - $7.99 per lb -- No grade mentioned, so mind your step. But if the quality looks good, it'd make a great treat!
• Cod fillet (fresh) - $11.99 per lb -- Fair price for fresh cod.
• Cucumber - $0.49 each -- WOW WOW! That's a DEAL! Meanwhile, Loblaws and affiliates can't sell us a cucumber for less than $1 on average, or 2.49 for a fancy organic one...
• Flat cabbage - $0.99 per lb -- Nice! Great to see cheap cabbage. I think we're going to see a resurgence of hardier, self-stable veg like this becoming popular.
• Sweet peppers - $1.99 per lb -- Great price for peppers. It's hard to find off-season peppers for less than $3/lb.
• Oranges - $1.29 per lb -- Not amazing, but still pretty good. $1/lb is really the better target. But, a couple of oranges won't risk the coop.
• Strawberries - $1.69 454g shell -- WOW! Produce Depot coming around to prove a point! These won't last, so plan your trip if you want these!
• Cheese counter - Fontina (Castello) - $2.79 per 100g -- Nice cheese for a good price. It's not cheap per se, but it's on point with prices for artisanal cheese.
• Deli - Pastrami - $2.39 per 100g -- Great price for nice deli meat!!!
• Produce Price Rating: Medium-low with very competitive specials on a shortened flyer. The small flyer is nice because it doesn't uselessly feature $6 heads of cauliflower and extremely high-price items that are either a confusion on the consumer, or an insult on the injury of not being able to afford supreme quality items.

Real Canadian Superstore (price matcher)

• Beef sirloin tip roast or steaks - $4.99 per lb -- Great price! I wonder about the grade, and I think I'd sooner do the roast because I know could get a tender bite out of the cooking method, versus fighting a tough steak that'll never rest into anything tender.
• Chicken breast (bone-in, skinless) - $3.99 per lb -- Good price for chicken breast, and bone-in is not bad. Boneless chicken loses out on a lot of flavour and moisture from the bone. And, there's so little bone along the breast that you don't really face the issue of undercooking it like you would with a leg (which requires higher temps or longer cooks, which can dry out if left too long in the oven or on the grill).
• Smoked sausages (No Name) - $9.99 900g pack -- From No Frills to RCSS, it'll cost you $3 to be in the store to get the same sausages...
• Asparagus - $2.99 per lb -- Good price for asparagus. When the crop-outs come through, we can see this dip to $2/lb, but out of that you can see as high as $4/lb.
• Mini cucumbers - $4.00 11-pack -- Well, considering we're seeing so many 6-packs go for $2, you've lose a cucumber with this 11-pack.
• Sweet peppers - $3.50 4-pack -- Great deal on a 4-pack.
• Vidalia onions - $5.99 3lb bag -- Sigh... $2/lb onions... Good onions, but damn...
• Potatoes (Imperfect) - $6.00 15lb bag -- Excellent! Great potato deal here, don't skip these! Pro tip: prep/cook whole potatoes in advance. Steam or pressure cook them, and keep them in the fridge. They slice real easy, and they fry/sauté really easily. Great for breakfasts, and a great alternative to bread.
• Grape tomatoes - $6.00 907g shell -- Great price for grape tomatoes. Freeze the ones that you don't use, and use them for stocks or to throw into soup to stew a bit before serving.
• Strawberries - $3.98 2lb shell -- Great deal. $2/lb, basically. That aligns with other great sales we see on strawberries.
• Pineapple - $3.00 each -- Good price for pineapple. $2 is the better target.
• Cantaloupe - $3.00 each -- Easy to find cantaloupe for $3, $2 occurs here and there. For the amount of melon you get, I don't think it's worth chasing that $1.
• Honeydew and Mini Watermelon - $4.99 each -- Meh prices for these melons. Not terrible, but not the greatest.
• Brick cheese (No Name) - $4.99 400g bar -- $5 brick cheese!
• Deli - Ziggy's Beef deli - $2.50 per 100g -- A consistent returning item and price for decent deli meat.
• Canned tomatoes (PC Blue Menu) - $1.59 796ml can -- Good price for canned tomatoes. Sometimes you can score canned tomatoes for as low as 1.25, 1.50 is still a very good price. $2 is not that great. 1.25 is the real stock-up price.
• Flour (Robinhood, Five Roses) - $11.99 10kg bag -- More and more I stand by having a 10kg bag in the pantry along with a jar of quick rise yeast. Making your own bread is not difficult. It's a fantastic skill to have. And after a dozen loaves, you'll get the hang of it.
• Produce Price Rating: Generally medium-low pricing, selectively amazing for some items.

Sobeys

• Chicken breast or thighs (boneless skinless, Compliments) - $5.88 per lb -- Upper-end fair going-rate for chicken breast. It's regular Adonis pricing, and more expensive than some of the better sales we see floating around.
• Chicken breast or thighs (boneless skinless, no antibiotics, Compliments) - $6.99 per lb -- Interesting to see the no-antibiotics version be $1/lb more. I wonder how that scales across all stores and brands... Seems to me $1/lb extra isn't bad.
• Pork tenderloin - $2.99 per lb -- Scene Member Price.
• Pork back rib - $2.99 per lb -- Scene Member Price.
• Beef brisket - $5.99 per lb -- $6/lb for AA grade ain't bad. Independent has the better deal on brisket, but choices must be made.
• Beef eye of round - $6.99 per lb -- It's a big cut of beef, but if you know how to spot and cut around the grain, you could get beef cubes, strips and marinating steaks out of this very easily.
• Scallops - $21.99 per lb -- Now, I usually don't recommend scallops, but I saw some scallop prices range of $28-32/lb. Farm Boy is just charging $3 for 2 scallops. LOL. And then you can score 300g frozen for $10 at Super C. Or get Metro bay scallops for $10/lb. No wonder I always go cross-eyed with scallop pricing.
• Cucumbers - $0.99 each -- Great price. Not the 50c sales we're seeing come up, but certainly better than some historical pricing we've seen.
• Red vine tomatoes - $0.99 per lb -- Awesome price for tomatoes!
• Brick cheese (Compliments) - $4.99 400g -- Good ol' $5 brick cheese!
• Cooked and frozen pork ribs (Compliments) - $13.99 680g pack -- I bring this up not because it's a valid suggestion. I bring this up because the same 1.5lbs of pork rib can cost you as low as $4.50 at the same store with the Scene pricing. You could get 4.5lb of rib. That's at least 2 big racks, which easily feeds 6 people with sides. Take that in. It is non-trivial! Manufactured/prepared products like this suck us dry.
• Dr Oetkey pizzas (Giuseppe) - $4.94 whatever -- Here we go again...
• Produce Price Rating: Generally a high price store, especially for produce. Some items are 50% more than more value-oriented stores. Kinda like Metro, some of the deals can be quite good.

Super C

• Chicken legs - $1.29 per lb -- WOW! Stock up! Fire up the BBQ! Marinate those legs over morning in some lemon juice, a little wine, rosemary, garlic, salt, pepper. Makes a great dinner main!
• Ground pork (extra lean) - $2.49 per lb -- WOW! Excellent price for ground pork!
• Tomahawk beef steak - $13.75 per lb -- Now, I'm not one to often suggest steaks like, this, but this is actually a tremendous cut. It might make a nice main for a special dinner!
• Bacon (Mere Michel) - $3.77 375g pack -- Good price for decent bacon. Lots of these sales going around.
• Asparagus - $2.77 per lb -- Great price for asparagus!
• Red vine tomatoes - $0.84 per lb -- WOW! Cheapest in town!
• Cucumbers - $0.99 each -- Nice! Let's hope these cucumber sales keep lowering!!
• Sweet potatoes - $0.99 per lb -- Great price! We're often seeing loose sweet potatoes range into the $1.30+/lb range.
• Blueberries - $0.99 half-pint -- Great price for blueberries!
• Lemons and limes - $0.99 for 3 -- Wow! Awesome price for citrus!
• Cantaloupe - $1.84 each -- Awesome! There's that $2 cantaloupe I was hoping to see!
• Oka cheese (and others!) - $4.75 170g pack -- Fantastic sale!!! Includes Monsier Gustav St-Paulin, Agropur Grand Cheddar, Notre-Dame brie, l'Extra Camembert. That's a lot of nice cheese at a nice price!
• Cheese Sale - $18 for 3 - varies -- Super cheese deal! Lots of varieties avialable, and you can score a lot of different products for basically $6 each.
• Earth's Own plant bev - $7.00 for 2x 1.75-1.89 --
• Dr Oetkey pizzas (Ristorante) - $3.47 whatever -- I think we can agree that these should be about 3.50 these days. Not $5...
• Produce Price Rating: Generally low, but can creep into medium for some items. But, there's always something decent available!

T&T Supermarket https://www.tntsupermarket.com * Produce Price Rating: Usually very competitive, catering to Asian cuisine. Warning: their newest sales start on Fridays - so this is a late advertising of their sales.
Walmart

• Whole chicken - $1.94 per lb -- Nice! I love $2/lb chicken! It puts us more on par with those loss-leader cooked chickens.
• Bacon (Great Value) - $2.94 375g pack -- Another bacon sale!
• Dinner sausage (Your Fresh Market) - $4.97 500g 4-pack -- Good price for raw sausage, but it's also close to the fresh-made price you can find at some stores ($6/lb). Note: precooked sausages and wieners are not something we should eat too often. They're packed with extra salts and fats, especially nitrites, which are used as a preservative, and it keeps meat pink. It's found in basically any processed meat you find on the shelf. In small quantities, it's fine, but North America is big on consuming these sorts of products, and some reports suggest 1/2 a hotdog a day, along with the bun and condiments, is linked to a 20% hike in rates of intestinal cancers. Raw fresh-made sausage often do not have nitrites. Just some food for thought and a reminder to check the ingredients listed on the package.
• Vine tomatoes - $1.94 per lb -- Not that great considering the sub-$1/lb sales we've seen.
• Green peppers - $1.94 per lb -- Fair and good rate on green peppers.
• Zucchini - $1.94 per lb -- A little high, but on par with other stores this week.
• Eggplant - $1.94 per lb -- A little high, but on par with other stores this week.
• Green onion - $0.94 for 2 -- Ouuu that's good for green onion. I was just saying $1 was the going-rate. This is half that! Excellent deal!
• Cilantro bunch - $0.94 for 2 -- Oh wow, that's really good for fresh cilantro. Bunches can be 99c, 1.50, or even $2.
• Mango (Red or Ataulfo) - $0.94 for 2 -- Awesome price for mango! There's an opportunity here for a mango salsa!!!
• Brick cheese (Armstrong) - $4.94 400g bar -- Good ol' $5 brick!
• Frozen veg (Great Value) - $2.47 500-750g -- More of a reminder to look out for this sort of pricing on frozen veg. Bags of corn, peas, string beans, these can all be had for about this price. And, they're perfect nutritious, if not more than "fresh" on a shelf as it's frozen after being picked when ready, instead of picked early and thrown onto a truck for a thousand kms.
• Olive oil (Sapurito) - $11.94 1L bottle -- Wow! $3 off the average doesn't sound like a lot, but 20% is 20%. It's kind of like "buy 4 and get 1 free".
• Butter (Gay Lea) - $4.94 454g bar -- $5 butter. Still expensive as all heck, but it's not $7-8.
• Produce Price Rating: A little all over the place. Some really good prices between a lot of average pricing.

Costco (Note that these are the online/shipped prices - reduce each item by $3 for in-store pricing)

• NOTE: NEED TO REVISE - --
• Paper Towel (Kirkland) - $27.99 12-roll pack -- 2-ply; 160 sheets
• Paper Towel (Bounty) - $27.49 12-roll pack -- 2-ply; 86 sheets
• Toilet Paper (Kirkland) - $25.99 30-roll pack -- 2-ply; 380 sheets
• Toilet Paper (Cashmere) - $24.99 40-roll pack -- 2-ply; 250 sheets (on sale)
• Dish soap (Dawn Platinum) - $18.99 2.66L -- Food Basics often has this jug for $10!
• Laundry detergent (Purex) - $24.99 9.24L -- 250 loads
• Garbage bags (30 gallon; large) - $15.99 100-pack -- Amazon has Glad standard 74L bags, 100-packs for $23, sometimes less if on sale
• Countertop green bin liners - $21.99 125-pack -- Amazon has Glad Compostable green bin liners 100-packs for $18, sometimes less if on sale
• Produce Price Rating: I need to do a proper check to be sure, but I find it's pretty average. There's an illusion of getting a good deal because of the bulk. Just be careful.

Jean Coutu (new sales start Fridays)

• Produce Price Rating: I have to start checking these just in case...

Shoppers Drug Mart (new sales start Fridays)

• Produce Price Rating: Sometimes they have cheap butter, eggs, and milk on weekends.

Some additional references!

• Grocery Review Google Drive Location https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1xhLvBP1smXb1eSnxAW5yyBjO2aYFLJHC?usp=sharing
• Cooking Tips and Recipes https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1TCcHm9y0kWIa3x18hznKN2ix0BPcUv-m?usp=drive_link
• Google Maps list of the Grocery stores in Ottawa https://maps.app.goo.gl/YT7cZmv8vMQWU4J59

There are so many delicious foods to eat on Thanksgiving, and it can be hard to narrow it down to just one or two favorites!
If you’re a Thanksgiving newbie, check out this list of Thanksgiving foods that start with L and introduce your taste buds to all of the scrumptiousness that awaits you!
Whether you plan on eating them in a traditional Thanksgiving dinner or as part of your own personal feast, try these tasty treats on your holiday table!
If you’re wondering what to serve at your Thanksgiving feast this year, consider the following list of Thanksgiving foods that start with L.
Listed below, these healthy dishes are delicious and nutritious ways to give thanks this holiday season.

1. Lobster

The holiday season means that it is time to celebrate, relax, and enjoy the company of family and friends. What better way to celebrate than with a scrumptious feast?
If you are searching for a mouth-watering dish to serve for your feast this year, look no further than lobster!
Lobster is a traditional dish served on holidays such as Thanksgiving and Christmas. However, its popularity has also made it an appetizer that can be served any day of the year.
Lobsters are available fresh or canned at most grocery stores or seafood markets. There are so many different ways to prepare lobster that it is hard not to find one that would suit your needs perfectly!

2. Linguine

Linguine is a type of pasta that is shaped like long, flat noodles. It can be served with various sauces or toppings, and it's a popular dish for the holiday season.
Served with butter, garlic, and olive oil, this dish is similar to clam sauce but has a more subtle flavor. Linguine can be served on its own as an appetizer or as part of a larger meal.
Cook linguine according to package directions. Drain and set aside in a serving bowl, reserving a cup of the cooking water in a small bowl.
Melt butter in a large frying pan over medium-high heat until foaming subsides; add garlic and cook, occasionally stirring, until fragrant but not browned (about 30 seconds), about 2 minutes.

3. Lima beans

Some people may not know that lima beans are traditional Thanksgiving foods that start with L. It's true! Lima beans (aka butter beans) are easy to make and taste delicious, especially when paired with ham. They're also high in protein, making a great side dish for vegetarians.

4. Lionfish

Thanksgiving is just around the corner, and if you're looking for some new, exciting Thanksgiving foods that start with L to put on the table.
There are lots of options. One example would be lionfish. This delicious fish can be prepared in various ways and makes for a tasty alternative to turkey or ham.
It's easy to find at most grocery stores, so all you need to do is pick up your ingredients, get cooking and enjoy!

5. Lychees

Let's talk about lychees. This delicious fruit is often a staple in Asian dishes, but it has also become more popular in Western cooking.
It looks like a little yellow grape with a tough outer shell that needs to be peeled away before you can eat the flesh inside. A great way to start your day!

6. Lamb

A rich and savory dish that pairs well with all of your favorite fall vegetables. Lamb is one of the most popular thanksgiving foods that start with L, but it's common to serve lamb.
Lamb is healthier than ham because it contains less fat and cholesterol than other meats. Plus, it also tastes delicious with cranberries and mashed potatoes!

7. Lasagna

This dish is perfect for feeding a crowd and can be made in advance to save you time on the day of the feast for Thanksgiving foods that start with L.

8. Latkes

Crispy and delicious, these potato pancakes are a delightful side dish to any meal. The latke is a dish that is traditionally served during Hanukkah but can be served at any time of year.
Latkes are typically made from grated potatoes mixed with eggs, salt and onions. The mixture is then pan-fried in oil. A typical garnish for a latke might include sour cream or applesauce.

9. Lemonade

It's not a holiday without the traditional pumpkin pie, but some other Thanksgiving foods start with L to consider.
Which is Lemonade, Refreshing and comforting. However, Lemonade is a staple for many people during the warmer months.
Nevertheless, it's also an excellent drink to enjoy on cold winter days. Whether you enjoy lemonade with a little bit of vodka in it or prefer iced tea with a generous helping of freshly squeezed juice, this beverage can be enjoyed all year long.
Besides being delicious, lemonade offers some health benefits, such as aiding digestion and providing Vitamin C.
This tangy beverage should be at the top of your list when you're looking for something new to try this Thanksgiving holiday!

10. Loin

The loin is a meat cut that comes from a pig's back and lower part. It's usually roasted, grilled, or smoked. In French, it's called filet, which means a thin strip.
The loin lies between the backbone and ribs, as well as in front of the sirloin and behind the tenderloin. Another term for a loin is pork chop.
Pork chops are often eaten fried or grilled with bacon. They can be served with applesauce or caramelized applesauce.
When buying pork chops, it's important to look at them closely to ensure they're not too dried out or stringy.

11. Lynchburg Lemonade

• Ingredients include
• Sweet Tea
• Triple Sec
• Fresh Lemon Juice (tablespoons) Instructions: Mix all ingredients together until well combined. Serve cold over ice cubes and garnish with a lemon slice!

12. Leek

A leek is a type of onion with a milder flavor than other onions. Leeks are used in soups and stews and as an ingredient in making curry sauce, and they will surely serve you perfectly for your Thanksgiving foods that start with L. They also work well with potatoes, spinach, and cream.
Slice off the root end of the leek, cutting up to one inch away from where it starts to flare out into green leaves.
Rinse thoroughly under cold water or soak in boiling water for a few minutes until it is softened but not colored. Trim off any tough parts from the green leaves near the white part, then slice them thinly crosswise.

13. Lahana Sarmasi

Start by chopping onion and green pepper into small pieces. Please place them in a medium-sized pot with vegetable oil, then add tomato paste and salt to taste.
Add water to cover the vegetables, bring the pot to a boil, then reduce the heat and simmer for 20 minutes.
After cooking time is up, remove the pot from the stovetop and stir in sugar (to taste) before leaving it to cool for 30 minutes.
When cooled down, mix in raisins, almonds, and pine nuts before adding rice; ensure the rice is well mixed before returning it to the pot.

14. Lovage

Lovage is an herb that tastes like celery, with a flavor similar to parsley but more intense and more like celery. It's often used in French cooking.
The leaves can be eaten raw in salads or cooked as a side dish (often boiled, braised, or sautéed). The seeds can be roasted, ground into a powder, and mixed with water to make a refreshing drink of Thanksgiving foods that start with L.

15. Liqueur

The liqueur is often used to signify a special drink enjoyed on holidays and other occasions that you want to fill your tables with Thanksgiving foods that start with L.
However, Liqueurs are typically sweet and are often made from fruits, nuts, herbs, or spices. One of the most popular liqueurs is Amaretto, made from apricot kernels.

16. Latte

I love a good latte! I like to start my day with one in the morning or have one with an afternoon snack and then end it with a cup of hot cocoa after dinner. Lattes can be enjoyed any time of day.
I love that lattes are easy to make at home. All you need is some whole milk, a teaspoon of espresso, a tablespoon of hot water, and some sweetener if you want it.
Nevertheless, You can make them as strong or as weak as you want by adjusting how much water you add too.
I also like that latte's come in different flavors and combinations, so there is always something new to try when you want your occasion to be special with Thanksgiving foods that start with L.

17. Lakoocha

Lakoocha is a traditional Russian dessert made of dough, oil, and honey;

18. Limeade

The tangy limeade is a refreshing drink for hot summer days. All you need to do is squeeze some fresh lime juice into a glass of water and add sugar if desired.
Also, a few ice cubes will help keep it cold while you sip on this delicious drink. If you want to make iced limeade, place all ingredients in a pitcher and stir until the sugar has dissolved. Pour over ice and enjoy!

19. Lavash

Lavash is thin, unleavened loaves of bread that are usually baked in a large clay oven called a tandoor. They can be used as Thanksgiving foods that start with L for serving guests.
The word lavash is derived from an Armenian word that means bread. Like many other cultures, Armenians wrap their traditional dishes in lavash before serving them to guests.
Their cuisine often includes dishes like kebabs or kabobs wrapped up in lavash before being eaten.

20. Lumpia

The Filipino dish, Lumpia, is one of the Thanksgiving foods that start with L, an egg roll with a savory filling wrapped in a thin wrapper and deep fried to create a crispy exterior.
Lumpia is usually served as an appetizer or as part of the main meal. The word lumpia means spring roll in Tagalog, reflecting that this dish has been around since ancient times in Southeast Asia.
L lumpia is typically made with ground pork, carrots, onion, garlic, and chili peppers in Filipino cuisine.
The mixture is then rolled up into flour wrappers that have been cut into strips before being dipped into hot oil to fry them until golden brown. This cooking method makes for a crispy outside with a moist inside and flavorful filling.

21. Lollipop

The lollipop is one of the most iconic sweet treats in America. In fact, more than 100 billion lollipops are made each year in the United States.
However, did you know that this confection has been around since at least as early as 1796? Believe it or not, Thomas Adams is credited with being the first person to put a stick into a ball of candy!
In addition to being a popular treat for people of all ages and backgrounds, lollipops also make great props for wedding photos and party favors for birthday celebrations. Plus, they're perfect for stocking stuffers too!

22. Lingcod

The lingcod is a type of fish that lives in cold water. It has a light, delicate, and meaty texture. There are many different ways to prepare this as one of the Thanksgiving foods that start with L, and it can be used in soups or stews as well as baked on its own.
The skin should be removed before cooking because it can become tough after cooking. The lingcod can also be grilled or pan-fried with butter and herbs, which will help keep the meat from drying out.
The best way to cook this fish is by baking it at 350 degrees Fahrenheit for about 15 minutes per inch of thickness (when measured at the thickest part). This ensures that the flesh is moist and tender without being dry or overcooked.

23. Littleneck

A littleneck is a type of clam found in the Atlantic Ocean and used as one of the common and popular thanksgiving foods that start with L. The name comes from its small size, which is about half that of a cherrystone clam.
This small bivalve mollusk has a hard and shiny exterior shell. Littleneck is often eaten steamed or raw as sushi, but they can also be used to make clam chowder or pasta dishes.

24. Limburger

This cheese is perfect for those who love a strong flavor. It's tangy, salty, and slightly pungent. This cheese has been aged for at least six months to help develop its complex flavor profile.

25. Lard

Lard is an animal fat that can be rendered to make cooking oil and soap. Lard has a higher melting point than butter, so it’s also often used in frying food.
Lard is also often used in desserts, such as pies and biscuits because it makes them flaky and crispy. If you’re vegetarian or vegan, lard can be replaced with vegetable shortening.
But it’s important to read the labels of any replacement product before using it because some contain hydrogenated oils, which are high in saturated fats and low in trans-fats.
For healthier alternatives to lard, try coconut oil or margarine made from plant-based fats such as soybean or sunflower oil instead!

26. Loaf

Many different types of Thanksgiving foods start with L, including quick-bread loaves, yeast-bread loaves, and sweet-bread loaves.
It's possible to find traditional versions or versions with nuts or raisins for some added texture or sweetness.
Bread can also be shaped into a round shape instead of a loaf. This is called a bâtard or boule. The word loaf comes from the Old English word hlāf, meaning bread.

27. Liverwurst

This German specialty is made with a mixture of pork and beef liver, bacon, and spices. It's typically served as part of a charcuterie platter or on rye bread.
Liverwurst is best when it's cooked to an internal temperature of 170 degrees Fahrenheit. This will give it that nice brown color and a slightly crispy crust.
The taste of liverwurst depends largely on how much bacon is included in the recipe, which determines its saltiness.
A good rule of thumb is that if you want to make something sweet for your Thanksgiving foods that start with L, liverwurst is a go, and you must use less bacon than you would for something savory (or add sweetener ingredients).

28. Land Cress

A delicate green herb with a peppery flavor, land cress is not to be confused with watercress which belongs to another genus entirely.
The plants of land cress are delicate, so it is best when eaten raw in salads or sandwiches.
Another way to enjoy it is by mixing it into fish sauces and using it as a garnish on soups. It does not keep very long, so you should use this herb immediately.

29. Loquat

The loquat, or Japanese plum, is a small fruit with a sweet and sour flavor. It is usually available in late winter and early spring. The loquat has green, leathery skin and yellow flesh.
You can eat them raw or cooked; they are often used to make jellies, jams, chutneys, and pies. Loquats contain high amounts of vitamin C and antioxidants.

30. Lemongrass

I can't think of anything better to eat on a cold, wintery day than a big bowl of thanksgiving foods that start with L.
The zesty, citrus flavor is perfect for warming up your insides while also providing a nice little vitamin boost. It's such an easy recipe too!
However, you need some chicken broth, fresh lemongrass, peeled ginger root, lots of fresh cilantro, and some salt (and pepper if you want) to taste.
Just add everything to a pot and let it simmer on low heat until all the flavors are well combined. I like to make this with lots of toppings like fried shallots, chopped peanuts, or even basil leaves that I can stir before serving.

31. Limoncello

The word limoncello literally means lemon honey in Italian. This sweet, citrus-flavored liqueur is perfect for any occasion, but especially on Christmas and New Year's Eve!
Limoncello is made by infusing lemon peels in alcohol, adding sugar to sweeten it, and then letting it rest for months.
It's usually served chilled or over ice with a splash of water or club soda. To make limoncello even more festive, add some fresh cranberries to make a cranberry limoncello!

32. Lettuce

Do you need a quick way to make your Thanksgiving dinner better? Try adding some Thanksgiving foods that start with L to it!
Lettuce has many health benefits, so it's a good idea to include this leafy green as part of your traditional menu. Here are some of the best Thanksgiving foods that start with L.
When it comes to lettuce, there are many different varieties to choose from. Green and red leaf lettuce both have a slightly bitter taste with a more bitter flavor when they're older.
Romaine is crunchier and has a more peppery taste which goes well with heavy salad dressings. An iceberg is milder than other lettuce and is a great choice for those who don't like the stronger flavors of other types of lettuce.

33. Lobscouse

This traditional Newfoundland dish is made with salt beef, potatoes and onions. Cooked in a pot or kettle, it's simmered together until tender and then thickened with flour.
The word lobscouse comes from the French lobster as this dish will be perfect for selecting from Thanksgiving foods that start with L.
It was originally made with lobster meat before salt beef became popular due to its affordability.
Lobscouse also has many variations depending on where you are in Newfoundland: it may be cooked in a large pot or kettle over an open fire and boiled for at least 4-6 hours; it might be served without vegetables (because they were scarce); and it might include carrots, turnip or parsnips.

34. Loganberry

The Loganberry is a cross between a blackberry and a raspberry. It was developed in 1907 by John Watson, who was a plant breeder from New Jersey.
The Loganberry typically has three to four times more sugar than other berries, with an intense taste that ranges from tart to tangy.
In addition to being delicious, the Loganberry is easy to grow and can be easily stored for long periods of time because of its high sugar content.

35. Lekvar

The word Lekvar is a common name for a fruit preserve made from whole quinces peeled and cooked with sugar.
The finished product has a consistency similar to that of jelly and can be used as a dessert topping or spread on cakes.
It also makes an excellent sauce when mixed with chicken, game meat, or pork. The name Lekvar comes from the Hungarian word lekvár, meaning fruit preserve.

36. Lox

You can't go wrong with lox when it comes to Thanksgiving foods that start with L. This cured salmon is delicious and packed with nutrients that will keep you energized all morning long.
Plus, it's super easy to make! How To Make Lox. Rinse a 1-pound salmon filet under cold water and pat dry with a paper towel on both sides.
Season both sides of the salmon with salt and pepper and place in a large bowl or dish. Combine one cup of sugar, one cup of kosher salt, three tablespoons dried dill weed, two tablespoons crushed black peppercorns, and four whole bay leaves in a small bowl and mix well to combine.

37. Lutefisk

This traditional Scandinavian dish is a gelatinous mass made from dried cod soaked in lye. It has a long history and was popular as a meat substitute during fasting.
Lutefisk is served traditionally with boiled potatoes, melted butter, and ground black pepper.
The taste and texture can be acquired for some people, but there's no denying that it's as appropriate to serve on Thanksgiving as Thanksgiving foods that start with L!
This traditional Scandinavian dish is a gelatinous mass made from dried cod soaked in lye. It has a long history and was popular as a meat substitute during fasting.
Lutefisk is served traditionally with boiled potatoes, melted butter, and ground black pepper.

38. Linguica

This dish is an American-Portuguese sausage made from pork, garlic, and red wine. The Linguica is a popular choice for those who like spicy foods because it has a hot kick to it. It’s commonly served with rice and beans or on its own as a breakfast meat.
Plus, this food is also great for outdoor barbecues because of its long shelf life and low price point. Try Linguica in your next meal today!

39. London Broil

Are you in charge of planning Thanksgiving foods that start with L? If so, congratulations! It's a big responsibility.
You may not know it but in addition to choosing food that everyone likes and making sure there are enough plates, silverware, and napkins on hand, you also need to consider the order of service.
For example: should the London broil be sliced ahead of time, or will people want to carve it themselves?
Will guests serve themselves from an entrée table, or will they be seated at their places with all their dishes set out for them?
And what about drinks? Which beverages will people prefer while they're waiting for dinner—water or wine? As you can see, there are a lot of decisions to make. But don't worry. London broil will always serve your guest right.

40. Liquor

This is obvious and will be needed for some of your guests. There are many different kinds of alcohol to choose from. If you know who will be coming, pick a type of alcohol that suits their tastes, whether that's wine, champagne, or something else entirely.
The liquor store is also where you can find all sorts of mixing ingredients, such as mixers like sodas or juices to go with it.!

41. Lahmacun

It's typically served with yogurt on the side for dipping or as a sauce for dipping. The dough is also sometimes sprinkled with sesame seeds before baking it.
The origins of Lahmacun are not entirely clear, but some believe it originated in Central Asia. While others say, it was popularized by Ottoman soldiers who brought this dish back to Turkey from their travels to Eastern Europe centuries ago.
No matter what its origins may be, one thing remains true - lahmacun is delicious among Thanksgiving foods that start with L!

42. Limpa

It's officially falling. This means that it's time to break out the pumpkin spice, but also time to enjoy the last of summer produce.
One of my favorite things about autumn is that we can finally start making some of our favorite Scandinavian dishes, like Limpa bread.
Limpa is a white bread containing wheat flour, rye flour, and malt syrup. It has a light texture and a lot of flavor from the combination of grains in it.
It was first created in Sweden for Easter Sunday because it's a special type of bread that uses all three main ingredients in communion wafers: wheat flour, water, and wine; rye flour; and malt syrup or molasses.

43. Lalanga

The lalanga, also known as pomegranate, is a tasty fruit with a sweet and tangy taste. It's also one of the first fruits to ripen in late summer.
The name for this fruit comes from the Persian word for apple, and it was brought to India by traders, where locals called it lalang.
There are many different varieties of Thanksgiving foods that start with L, and lalanga is one of them, and lalanga are of different types too, but they all look similar with thin-skinned red or dark-purple fruit.
Lalangas are often eaten fresh or dried, but they can be made into jams and other desserts. Lalangas are high in vitamin C, making them an excellent food for the cold season.

44. Liederkranz

I love Liederkranz. It's a mixture of cheeses, apples, and nuts that is baked in a ring-shaped dish. It's traditionally served at Christmas but tastes great any time of year.
My mom makes it for me every holiday because she knows I love it so much. Nothing is better than biting into one of those thick slices with whipped cream on top.

45. Lupin Beans

This ancient legume, lupin beans, is relatively unknown in the United States. They are gaining popularity with chefs and heirloom food enthusiasts alike due to their meaty texture, earthy flavor, and ease of use.
Lupins can be used in many dishes, including soups, salads, or even rice replacement. Rinse and soak overnight in water to which you have added 2 Tbsp of salt.
Drain and rinse again before cooking for about 30 minutes until tender but not mushy. Flavor with butter, soy sauce, or garlic if desired (optional).

46. Lavender

The first letter of lavender is L for Lavender. Lavender is a perennial plant and can be found in many colors, including purple, white, blue, and pink. The leaves are used for cooking, but the flowers are also edible.
This herb has a gentle flavor that goes well with other herbs like thyme or rosemary. Adding it at the end of the cooking process is best because heat will cook away some of its flavors.
When making mint tea or iced tea, you can use lavender buds as a substitute for peppermint leaves.

47. Lady Apple

Mix one cup of apple cider with three tablespoons of brown sugar in a bowl. Peel and chop two apples.
Add the apples to the mixture and stir. Place in a pot over medium heat and bring to a boil, occasionally stirring until it starts to thicken.
Reduce heat to low, cover pot, and let simmer for 15 minutes or until it becomes syrupy. Serve warm or cold with vanilla ice cream as a topping if desired.

48. Lentils

Lentils are an inexpensive and healthy source of protein, iron, zinc, and B vitamins. Lentils are also a good source of fiber which can help lower cholesterol levels.
They are perfect Thanksgiving foods that start with L for people with diabetes because they have a low glycemic index and do not cause rapid spikes in blood sugar.
Lentils come in both green and brown varieties and can be served on their own as a side dish or mixed with other ingredients to make soup, casseroles, or chili.

49. Lemons

The quintessential lemon is a yellow citrus fruit that looks like a large, roundish lime. Lemons are high in vitamin C and low in calories; they contain both citric and ascorbic acid.
The juice of lemons can be used as a flavoring or as an ingredient in many Thanksgiving foods that start with L, including desserts like lemon meringue pie.

50. Limes

Lime is a citrus fruit that is round in shape and lime green in color, though they come in various shades of green, from yellow-green to dark green, depending on the ripeness of the fruit.
They are typically sour and juicy, with some varieties being sweeter than others. Limes are a great way to add some tangy flavor to your dishes.
Whether you want to use them for margaritas or want to squeeze a little juice on top of your dish, limes will give you that tangy flavor.
Juicing limes can be messy, which is more challenging than juicing oranges because they are much smaller.
Be careful when juicing limes because you can easily get seeds in your drink, and nobody wants that. If you don't care about the seeds, squeezing limes might be easier for you than any other citrus fruit.

51. Liver

This nutrient-packed and low-calorie food should be noticed. It is rich in Vitamin A, Iron, and Selenium. The liver is also a good source of Zinc, Riboflavin, Niacin, Vitamin B6, Copper, and Potassium.
The consumption of liver can help build muscle mass due to its high protein content, which is perfect for Thanksgiving foods that start with L.

52. Lemon Basil

This recipe is a twist on traditional basil pesto. I wanted to use lemon because it's such an awesome flavor and in this recipe has that tart citrusy taste, which is perfect for fall.
It includes cilantro, garlic, olive oil, chili flakes, and basil. It's so simple to make and will be a great addition to your thanksgiving menu!

• Cup fresh cilantro leaves (leaves only) Cup fresh basil leaves (leaves only)
• Cup olive oil
• Cloves garlic
• Juice from one lemon
  
• A pinch of salt
  
• A few dashes of chili flakes
  

53. Lemon meringue pie

There is nothing more comforting or delicious to warm up with on Thanksgiving day than thanksgiving foods that start with L. Lemon meringue pie.
It has an airy, melt-in-your-mouth crust, creamy lemon filling, and a fluffy meringue topping that's baked to perfection.
You can make this dessert in advance and refrigerate it until you're ready to serve it. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees Fahrenheit.
Line the pie crust with parchment paper or foil and fill it with pie weights or dry beans so that it doesn't puff up while baking.
Bake the crust for 8 minutes, then remove from the oven and remove parchment paper or foil along with weights and beans before adding the filling.

54. Lamb’s Lettuce

This type of lettuce is a cross between romaine and butterhead lettuce and has an overall soft appearance. The leaves are green or dark red in color and grow to be about five inches wide.
It features a mild flavor that blends well with most salad dressings, making it a favorite among chefs.
The leaves are crisp and can hold up to heavy dressings without wilting or becoming soggy like some other lettuces do when mixed with creamy sauces.
Conclusion
I hope this post has helped you with your search for new thanksgiving foods that start with L. It's important to keep in mind that only some dishes work for some families.
So be sure to make a list and try it out before you commit to anything. And, of course, if you have any occasion, please feel free to use thanksgiving foods that start with L. Happy Thanksgiving!

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Just as expected, Carbon was waiting at the entrance to Engineering - it had its own stop on the maglev line. It was the heart of the ship. On Human ships it was usually the single largest section, what with all the power generation and multiple methods of ship motivation going on. Unless he was mistaken - which he could be as he was just guessing at the moment as there was no speedometer on the maglev tram - it was about two-thirds of the way back from the bow. A human ship would usually have it all the way to the aft.
What he hadn’t expected was how Carbon was dressed. He’d gotten used to her in a lightly modified CPP coverall while back on the Kshlav’o, once she had stopped wearing the encounter suit. In retrospect, it should have been obvious that wasn’t her normal getup. It had all the exact same pockets as his - in what universe did two separate species both develop coveralls with the same pocket layout and nametag location?
Even the standard Tsla’o pants and jacket had been easy to adjust to.
This getup, on the other hand, made her look a little bit like a videogame character. Brown boots that nearly came up to her knees, with slabs of scuffed armor and soles so thick she was noticeably taller. Similarly heavy khaki-colored pants, made of thicker fabric than what she normally wore, reinforced impact patches at the knees, hips, and lower back. Absolutely resplendent with pockets. Looked like there were a few places to hook up a safety harness, and guides for a belt as well.
That all pretty much made sense. He understood the functionality. Above the beltline, on the other hand, was not as understandable. It looked mostly she was just wearing the smallest daman possible and a very short jacket as well - it looked like the same leather-like material as her boots, and even sported some matching armor. Despite that, it didn’t go past her rib cage, and appeared to stop at her elbows. Left pretty much the entire middle of her body exposed, which seemed a bit counterproductive.
There was a lot of technology integrated into the jacket. Sensor clusters around the collar glowed softly, and there were a few holographic emitters sitting dark dotting the area. Her antenna rested in slots around the back to interface with the built-in computer and any nearby networks.
Out of all of this, the most notable thing for Alex was that she looked so at ease here as she wrapped her arms around his torso and squeezed the life out of him. She looked happy in a way that she hadn’t until now.
“I hope you have slept well?” Carbon looked up, not a hint of tiredness in her face or voice despite having gotten up in the middle of the night to work.
“I actually did, yeah. Feels like I haven’t done that in awhile.” He did not bring up what he and Neya had talked about. Not standing around here in the open - he wasn’t up with the ins and outs of their culture, let alone the entire Zeshen thing, but it felt like the wrong place. They would have that talk once they were back at the cabin.
“Good.” Her smile was sublime, eyes squinting with an easy delight. She gestured at the package in his hands. “And what is this?”
Alex was pretty sure she had never looked this relaxed before. Maybe communing with the ship really was something she needed to be doing. “Gloves. Well, gauntlets. Sergeant Zenshen brought them over as I was heading out. She’s my military liaison now, I guess. Per Eleya’s orders.” His gaze kept dropping back to her exposed midriff for some reason.
Even mention of her aunt didn’t phase her, though her eyebrows did come down with a hint of chagrin. “She was acting as Colonel Lehnan’s liaison, and has just been attached to you? Though... They are already attached to the project concerning the artifact.” She had her phone out, tapping away at the screen.
“Yeah, she didn’t seem bothered by it?” He shrugged. In his estimation, the Sergeant had been having a pretty good time, except for that little hiccup in the corridor. It was probably a pretty easy assignment, all things considered. Most of the time. “Just keeping me from stepping on the wrong toes.”
“Be that as it may, I have asked Neya to look into how this was done - I do not want to leave the Colonel sitting on the riverbed.” She slipped the phone away into her entirely too short a jacket and looped her arm around his, a sly smirk on her muzzle as she directed them both off the tram platform. “Now, on to more pressing matters?”
“Sounds good. Where are you taking me?” His knowledge of the ship ran out just as soon as they walked through the archway, into a slightly busy corridor. These people were at work. They moved with purpose and many were carrying equipment he didn’t recognize, or pushing antigrav carts with large equipment he didn’t recognize, save for one poor duo trying to hover the biggest impeller press that he’d ever seen outside a dry dock through the crowd.
“There is a place here that is, I believe, much like your Noonan’s.” She had to speak up a little bit over the background noise here, but still very much in her preferred environment. “It is... The Hammer’s Rest, I think is a good translation. A place for crews who are on breaks or may be called up.”
“Oh neat.” It dawned on him that this was the first time he was seeing the actual crew of the Sword. Several wore powered environment suits in an eye-catching shade of red, but most were clad in the nearly the same outfit that Carbon wore. Some had long sleeves, others full length jackets. Anything that looked like leather was colored coded on theirs, as well. Blue, red, orange, purple... “Ok, honest question here - what’s up with the coat? Yours doesn’t seem very safe.”
“My coat?” She looked down at it, realization filling her eyes as she laughed. Carbon grasped the hem with both hands, thumbs resting on a subtle pair of buttons, and just pulled it down like a curtain. She let it go at her hip so it slightly overlapped her pants. “Adjustable, but it is common practice to have the sleeves and hem raised when one is off duty.”
“Hang on, does that extrude material?” His gaze fell on her abdomen again, now framed. Looks like he was learning something about himself this morning.
“Very good, it does. Allowing the user to adjust their equipment to their body and protective needs without custom tailoring or changing gear for different tasks.” She gestured at a passing crewmember in one of the red environment suits, helmet retracted and focused on whatever the holographic display before him was showing. “Though particularly dangerous tasks still require more.”
“Well damn, all right. It changes color too, right? All networked together?” Not a big jump, if they were stacking that much technology into protective gear.
“Correct again.” Carbon nearly sang it as she tugged him down a side corridor. “In Engineering they are for teams, though in other parts of the ship they may have specific jobs.”
“Like flightdeck crew.” The most obvious group who used color coding, off the top of his head.
“Exactly.” Their path turned again, this time through another archway that rivaled the size of the one into the tram station, holographic letters in the most garish colors possible stretched overhead.
Alex wanted to call it a restaurant, at first. It was huge compared to the other places he had been on board, about thirty meters to a side, and actually dim. The walls were lined with long tables, clusters of color-coded workers spread out around the place. The center of the room was taken up by a big square bar, though, which made it more of a pub or tavern - very much like Noonan’s.
Also like Noonan’s, everything was made of dark wood. The floor, stools, chairs, tables, the bar, all a sort of dark red-brown that occasionally dipped into black, metalwork done in gleaming steel. The walls carried a wattle and daub pastiche, wooden beams running floor to ceiling and horizontally from corner to corner, filled in with a checkerboard of dark green and blue stucco. While it didn’t have the big screen Noonan’s sported, there were a dozen or so smaller screens with a plethora of information about who was needed where.
“This feels like my kind of joint.” Even the curious glances being tossed his way felt normal. Like that’d be what any dumbass rolling in wearing a fancy jacket would get. The din of conversation was far and away the most surprising part - his translator was catching at least half of it, the banality of people waiting for something to happen crystal clear. “Tell me they sell t-shirts?”
“Wh- no, they do not sell t-shirts.” Carbon sighed with a smile and pointed out a door halfway down the far wall, their destination.
“Not yet.” He wouldn’t have minded a heads up about the overall casualness. Any excuse to dress down, honestly. Beyond the door was just a smaller, but similarly themed room with a fraction of the people in it. A bar ran halfway down one side, the rest of the floor containing smaller tables for two or four. The change in dress was noticeable, going from the engineering gear to stuff more like what Aena from the novel he’d been reading had been wearing - pants and a sleeveless vest. Manager clothes, though matching the colors everybody else outside wore.
She settled in at a shorter table in the corner, handing him a menu from the stack waiting there. “Everything they make is pretty good.”
“All right. No warnings about the chicken fingers?” He said, recalling the last time they’d been in a pub.
Carbon laughed. “No. Probably no drinking - it is a bit early in the day to start.”
“Yeah, not drinking before noon has treated me pretty well.” So far, anyway. “But now that you got me thinking about it, I kinda want a Mimosa.”
“A what?”
“Orange juice and champagne.” He perused the menu, the translations an unhealthy mix of generic terms for food items and nouns that left him with no idea what anything was. Shoreline Broth with Root Vegetable left so much to the imagination. There were plenty of ways to interpret that which didn’t strike him as appetizing. Was it fish based? Did it remind one of low tide? How far into ‘alien taste sensation’ were they getting here, and what was the sensation he’d be feeling? “You usually drink them with brunch, which this is probably not.”
Carbon laughed and set her menu down with a bemused smile. “And what is brunch?”
“It’s a meal that’s later than br-eakfast, but before l-unch.” Alex split the words up into what was hopefully a clear explanation of the portmanteau, and set his menu down too. Time to go to the old standby. “Mostly breakfast food, though, and focusing more on socialization than a meal specifically. Hence a little morning drinking.”
She perked up as he explained it, ears shifting a little to focus on him. “That sounds... it sounds interesting.”
“If you want to go, I know a few places in Berkley, though I suppose anywhere in-system is accessible right now with a little planning.” He didn’t miss that she was interested. More interested than he’d seen her in human stuff since they had gone shopping. Maybe a bit of relaxation in her own culture was giving her the space to be interested in his... Though, brunch seemed a bit superficial. Whatever. It was interest in him and his culture, and it felt good.
Made him really want a Belgian waffle, too.
“I would enjoy that.” Carbon petered off, turning to look at the waitress as she approached the table.
She had dark red fur, and was bundled up to an extent that Alex hadn’t seen yet on any Tsla’o outside of a powered suit - a blouse that actually closed around the neck and matching slacks in light weight, natural colored materials. Long boots, and gloves that ran up to her elbows, and an apron tied around her waist. There was a forced seriousness to her, staring straight at the green square of wall at the end of the table. She set a teapot down between them, shaking hands distributing a cup to each of them before she started speaking way too fast. “Hello we are ready to receive your order.”
Alex couldn’t put a finger on it, but she was familiar looking. A little on the short side, and he was pretty sure fairly young. Late teens, maybe. Her eyes seemed proportionally larger than an adult, which according to the massive peepers on Adana last night was a neotenous trait on the Tsla’o as well. Wait. “Oh- Akai, Haraya!”
Carbon looked from their stressed out waitress to Alex, and then back to Haraya. Then back to Alex, eyebrows raised in confusion. “How do you know her?”
“She’s the one who gave me directions last night. Thanks again for that, by the way.” He gave her a little nod. Looks like she knew who she was standing in front of this time. Probably expected him to still speak fluent Tsla, too, because she clearly didn’t understand what he was saying in English. That was a problem he had not foreseen last night.
She still made a strangled little sound that was in the general vicinity of positive and bowed deep enough to make the bartender look over.
“Oh. Yes, that was very appreciated.” Carbon spoke in Tsla as she looked back to Haraya, who was still staring intently at the wall. “Please, such formality is not required, or sought. I assure you.”
“Of course Princess.” Haraya replied, catching herself before she got too deep into another bow. Her eyes darted to Carbon with nervous energy. “What would you care to order?”
“Ah, just a bowl of simmered grass grains with fruit mash, please.” She favored the young woman with a friendly smile as the translator brutalized her language for a solid two seconds after she stopped speaking.
Alex balked. “Isn’t that what you always have?”
She switched languages without missing a beat. “Yes, it has served me well.”
“Ok, so I was just going to have what you’re having. Translator really does a number on food names and I kinda figured, you know, restaurant. We wouldn’t just be having something we make at home.” His expectation of that wasn’t panning out to be very interesting. After the ‘lace crackers’ and that sausage yesterday, breakfast was feeling like good territory to explore their cuisine. “So uh... Can you recommend something for me?”
“Mh. You make a good point. They have many ingredients we do not normally keep at home.” Carbon pondered the menu on the table for a moment while Haraya continued to look nervous. She had switched languages again when she looked up. “We will both have the Shoreline Broth with burnt noodles and chef’s decision.”
“Sounds.” Well that was an interesting hole to have stepped in. “Great.”
“Of course, thank you Princess. Prince. It will be ready soon.” The waitress gave them both little bows and walked away as fast as she could.
Alex waited until Haraya had gone through the doors to where he assumed the kitchen was. “She wasn’t like that when she gave me directions.”
“Most youth do not... Have any experience with us. Nobles used to be rare, but they are truly scarce now. The number of Royals has increased recently, though. ” She smirked and lifted the teapot, pouring first into Alex’s cup, then filling her own. “I suppose they have not met many Humans, either. But that was not the nerves of meeting a new race on display.”
“I don’t think she thought I was actually, you know. Real. Which, given how I was dressed at the time, is completely understandable.” He scanned the bar, the only three other people there sitting at it. None of them seemed nearly as concerned about their presence. They all had signs of aging, silver gray fur standing out clearly on two, and nearly wreathing the head of the other.
Him and Carbon were the youngest people in here by years, at least.
“I think it may have been more that a Human appeared before her, on the flagship of the Tsla’o Empire.” She laughed and reached out to cup his hands. “How did you manage to get so lost on your adventure, anyway?”
“Ugh, all right.” He launched into a cut down version of events, where he spent way less time actually being lost and glossed over the fact he was just opening up electrical and communications closets. Very quickly getting to the interesting part with Adana finding him standing there in the hall, considering his options.
“He does sound very cute. By your description, I would say three to four years old. Perhaps he did not wish to speak to a stranger.” Carbon replied to his inquiry about how old the kids he’d just told her about were. “Haraya is probably sixteen. A little young to be working, but this area is quieter, less likely to be rowdy. And you say there were six children?”
“Six and Haraya, yes.” It did seem like a lot of kids. He knew of one family back in Berkley that had four kids. But seven? Parents must have been busy in a couple of different ways.
“That is... unusual for Tsla’o families. It is rare to have more than three.” She hummed softly, eyes turned towards the ceiling as she leaned back in her chair and pondered. “Deck 60, below the Stronghold complex, port side... I do not understand, there should be a frigate bay there. Not ‘civilian’ housing.”
“I dunno what to tell you. A lot of it looked new. Still smelled like a print forge.” Frigate bay? Damn this ship was big. He was sure Human carriers sported large launchable escorts as well, but it was weird to hear about them actually having internal storage.
Carbon activated the holographic emitters on her jacket and projected a schematic of the ship over the table between them, zooming in on the area he’d been in. “Did it smell greasy or acrid?”
“Greasy, why?”
“That is what a Human forge smells like. Ours produce a more astringent scent.” She manipulated the hologram further, isolating a subsection of the ship. “Hm. Removed both bays under the Stronghold entirely and refit them with self contained residential... communities. Most of it is housing, but there are a few public spaces. Power is mostly off the ship grid, same with the other utilities. Dedicated food production. Schools.”
So it had just been built, with parts from a Human sourced forge. Based on the doors and access panels, it had then been finished with Tsal’o technology. Alex leaned in, inspecting the cross section of decks. Most of it was turned inward, the doors opening to corridors that did not run to the rest of the ship, with a few small clusters of exceptions that seemed to be tacked on to fill out space. “The layout really reminds me of an arcology. Industry at the bottom, more livable space above. Just a continuous eighty decks tall.”
Carbon’s ears twitched and the hologram shut off just as Haraya emerged from the back with two large bowls on a tray.
Their waitress was more comfortable now, though her gaze remained steadfastly anywhere other than them as she delivered the steaming soup. “Thank you for your patience.” She said this at a much more normal speed as she laid out a setting of chopsticks and spoons for them.
Carbon replied first. “Of course, thank you for your efforts.”
“Thank you.” Alex echoed, in English. He thought about it for a second and realized that she wasn’t going to pick that one up. “Sa meha.”
Haraya bowed again, departing swiftly.
“Already getting tired of that.” He mumbled, picking up his chopsticks and inspecting the Shoreline Broth with burnt noodles and chef’s decision. It was mostly noodles and decision, the broth barely visible under the pile of... food items. It did not smell like low tide, so that was a point in its favor already. The scent actually reminded him of saimin. Salty, savory, very much with a seafood origin. The burnt noodles were thick tan disks that had a little crinkle of black scorch around the outside, a hole in the middle indicating they had been on a stick and grilled or broiled, then sliced after the fact. Had a nice bite to it, but no real flavor aside from the broth and a hint of sweet ash.
“I think she is reacting based on how she has seen Nobles presented in media. They usually start as aloof and quick-tempered.” Carbon had tucked in without delay, pausing to talk with a bunch of shredded vegetables gripped in her chopsticks. “Though by the end of those stories they have learned humility one way or another, and are on their way to becoming good people.”
“Sounds like we started at the end.” Alex found a piece of that spicy moss he liked and picked it out. He could do with a dab of Chinese mustard in the broth to add another layer of flavor, but otherwise he was a little annoyed that this monstrously named dish was starting to grow on him. Maybe not as a breakfast, but he could see having it for dinner. “Is it rude to add seasoning to food? Wouldn’t mind a little more heat in this.”
“If there are spices on the table, it is acceptable.” She slid a little jar at the far end of the table over to his bowl before reactivating the holographic display. It was a little dimmer this time and at a smaller scale, rotating slowly as she ate. “This is based on our community towers. Largely self-contained buildings with shopping, restaurants, utilities and work areas on the lower floors, and apartments of varying sizes above them. It is very much like your arcologies, on a smaller scale.”
“Alright, that answers that.” The pot was split into three segments, a little spoon resting in each. He carefully tasted all of them, a drop of each onto his chopsticks so he could determine what he was getting into. One salty, one a sort of sweet vinegar, and the third a gentle warmth with no discernable flavor. He heaped a few spoonfuls of the third into his bowl.
“It does.” She reached over and added a spoonful of the vinegar to her own bowl.
“Looks like... Six hundred apartments of varying sizes?” There was nearly as much of a weird shredded vegetable in the bowl as there were noodles. It was like a cabbage and a potato had been combined into something Alex couldn’t tell if he liked or not. “So they added... what, two thousand people in each tower? Four thousand people total.”
“If they are putting seven children into one larger home... Hopefully with at least two adults, it could be closer to five thousand.” She idly stirred her bowl, zooming back out to the entire ship again, shuffling through something that changed which section of the ship was being highlighted. “Renovated several areas into senatorial offices. One floor of the Stronghold seems to contain a parliamentary chamber now, as well. I believe Eleya has had the Sword of the Morning Light converted to act as a mobile capital.”
“So it’s an actual capital ship now?” Alex tried to hide the smirk that came with that pun but failed miserably as it turned into a broad grin. “Does explain why there’s so many senators on board.”
Carbon glared at him for a second, a sigh shifting into a quiet laugh. “And why she brought it to Sol.”
He chewed on some more of the cabbage-potato abomination that he was rapidly leaning towards not liking, sussing Eleya’s reasoning out. “Defense?”
She nodded in agreement. “How far into Sol do you suppose an unscheduled ship could get?”
“Wouldn’t even make it through the Oort cloud. That’s where the first layer of interdiction is.” He lifted what was clearly some kind of larva out of the broth and ate it, a burst of umami and the warmth of alcohol on his tongue. How did they get it to do that? “You guys have an interdiction system too, right?”
“Of course. Nearly as large as the one around Sol.”
The puzzle was starting to come together for him. “If she is legitimately concerned about the Empire fracturing, the threats to the Sword wouldn’t necessarily be coming from outside your home system. It could be coming from another ship in their own carrier group.”
“Here they will need permission to enter Confederate space, and Sol itself. I would not be surprised if Eleya was in communication with the Confederation about which Tsla’o ships should have access.” Carbon poked around in the bowl, searching for something particular. “Even one of our stealth craft would find making the trip undetected difficult, or extremely time consuming.”
“And for the time being it’s under the guise of further exploration of the artifact, not just taking advantage of the distance and local security to keep threats at bay.” Alex poured himself more tea and topped off Carbon, thinking about Eleya’s request of him last night. To take Carbon and request asylum in the Confederation should the Empire fall. Being right here at the seat of power would make the trip to ask real quick.
“Gives intelligence more time to work on those threats, as well.” She picked her tea up and nodded in thanks before taking a long sip.
“Alright, gotta give her credit for that.” He set about separating all of the cab-tato from the rest of the selection of items in the broth. Maybe he’d revisit it with different vegetables, but that part really wasn’t working with the flavor of the broth for him. “That’s a pretty good plan.”
 
First Prev Next
*****
Just having a nice hot breakfast. Nothing huge happening, just sussing some stuff out. A moment to breathe.
To save you the google: Saimin is a noodle soup from Hawaii. Sorta like ramen, but using a very clear dashi (kelp and bonito) broth.
Art pile: Carbon reference sheet. Art by Tyo_Dem

Allright, so I was at the market today and ended up buying (spare?)ribs from the butcher. Never made them before. His advice was to boil for 30 minutes in water and then finish in the oven. Doesn’t sound like the best way to me… I want them to be nice and tender.
Tell me how you make juicy tender tasty ribs!
Mostly looking for advice on how to make them tender. But tips for marinade/spice rub all of that are welcome too. I’m a bit of a meat noob, usually my boyfriends specialty.
More info:
I’m cooking them tomorrow so can marinade today if needed
What I can use: induction stovetop, sous vide, oven, convection oven, airfryer. I don’t have a grill/bbq. I do have a stovetop grill but it’s not ideal.
Update: they were delicious, thanks for the tips. https://imgur.com/a/FomiRj6

Welcome back to the Fallowveil trailer park, where the crack addicts have all seen aliens, the Witch is the glue holding the community together, and it’s been a whole six years since our last meth lab explosion. I never met you, but rest in peace Jones. I’m Mason, and I’ll be your janitor guide to the weirdness.
So I’ve talked about Jennifer, my paranormally sexy, but terrifying neighbor who lives with a married couple, strips under the name “Red Jenny,” and possibly eats people’s souls. She’s just the tip of the iceberg here in this town. I could go on and on about my neighbors. I have to do an entry on Trista the nocturnal hippy (maybe) vampire at some point. I have a feeling she’ll get a kick out of it. We’re actually pretty friendly, since we're both night shift workers. Frankly, she’s a bit too on-the-nose though. Pale girl, windows all blocked during daytime, only out at night, weirdly strong for such a skinny little person, drinks a mysterious fluid from a hip flask that she refuses to share, I mean… she’s either a vampire or a weird healthnut hippy and she dresses like she’s both. We’ll get to her eventually.
For now, let’s talk about the old “Schroeder Slaughterhouse.” The place has been a center piece of the town since it was created. It brought jobs to workers and brought lucrative meat processing trades into town, elevating it to more than just another ‘corn town.’ It’s also got horror stories going all the way back to its construction. Some say it’s been cursed by the devil himself.
I want to talk about this one because Trista talked me into going to one of Petunia’s barbecues last weekend. Not sure why she’s suddenly friendlier with me, but I’m not complaining. She couldn’t come with me of course, being a (probably) vampire and all. But hey, depression only gets worse in isolation. I should ask her out some time. Being a vampire might be fun…
So anyway, I went to Petunia’s cookout. Petunia herself looked up and actually cried out loud and power walked up to me to give me a hug. “Ahhh! I’m so glad to see you outside Mason! The neighborhood misses you!” I'm ninety percent sure that was a lie, but whatever. It’s comforting. I returned the older woman’s hug.
“Thanks Petunia. Couldn’t stay away from your cooking forever.” That got a few chuckles. To my surprise, a lot of my neighbors came up to shake hands with me. I was confused until one of them, a guy named Fred, who lives next door to me, leaned in to say “sorry about that friend of yours that died.”
So that’s what’s happening. Everybody heard about psycho Moe and how he’d dragged me to a strip club where he planned to go on a killing spree. Now they’re playing nice. That’s probably the only reason Trista’s being nice to you too. These people don’t really care about you. You’re worthless.
‘You know what, brain? You’re a real bummer. Now shut up while I try to be social.’ I shot back at my own conscience.
I finally worked out how to respond to Fred after a few seconds of awkward silence that made us both uncomfortable. “He wasn’t really a friend. Just a roommate once. The guy was messed up.”
Fred nodded sympathetically, rubbing at his mustache “Well sure. But that’s a heck of a… situation?” He replied.
“Yeah. I guess it is…” I tried to look thoughtful so nobody could see me rolling my eyes. “But hey! I think Red Jenny took care of it.”
Fred’s eyes widened at that. “No shit? Did he get… did he get a private dance?”
We were both interrupted by a silky smooth voice with a southern twang. “Glad to see you’re okay Mason. Try not to bring any psychopaths to my place of business, alright? It’s got plenty. Our poor bouncer had to headlock that guy.” She said all of this without even glancing towards us. Just sort of talking at the air as she sauntered by. She was glorious as ever, somehow making comfortable sweats look like a sexy bold fashion statement. Jennifer. Red Jenny. I hushed up as she stepped past us, and as she did, she cast a glance my way… and she winked.
Fred and I sat there partly struck dumb for a moment. That woman hardly spoke to anyone.
“Bouncer my ass.” Fred whispered to me. “That chick’s some kind of monster, I’m telling you. What did you see? She offered him a private dance didn't she?”
A few weeks ago I would have jumped at the opportunity to tell Fred everything I could about what I saw, but for whatever reason, I was less enthusiastic at the moment. “Yeah, she did, but I’m not really sure what happened. I was kinda stupified by the guns. She probably got a bouncer to help her, I really don’t know.”
“Never get a private dance from Red Jenny. Some say that’s a warning from wives, but the rest of us know it’s a warning from above. Something ain’t natural at that place.”
“I dunno Fred. But she works hard. I don’t want to badmouth her. Even if it was true, the guy she got was a wannabe killer. So she saved people.”
“Yeah, but how!?”
“I dunno man.”
Fred seemed to figure out I didn’t want to talk anymore about it by then. “Sorry, man. Must have been scary, either way. But hey! We all know you were asking around about Fallowveil’s spooky stories! Guess what!? A bunch of people who used to work at the old slaughterhouse are here! They’re all swapping stories by the grill! You should go listen!”
That piqued my interest. I used my phone to record as much as I could. I think I remember the rest. Now that I’ve looked at all my notes and stuff, I think I can provide a decent history of Fallowveil’s Schroeder Slaughterhouse. At least according to some of the people who worked there, as well as some who’ve lived here longer than me.
Most of the history came from a man named Willard Graves. He’s notorious for being really nasty when he’s drunk, and being one of the oldest people living in the trailer park at the age of 68. When I arrived at the bonfire where the group of workers had gathered, they were all swapping stories.
“I once felt a presence in the women’s restroom!” Said Polly Bucharest. “I was a floor manager in 2007. I was sitting in the stall there doing my business, nobody came in or out, but suddenly I just felt it. I got real freaked out. Like… goosebumps and everything. And feeling that way sucks in the bathroom. So I tried to hurry up and kicked open the stall so I could run to the sink… and the ‘shadow man’ was just standing in the corner. I saw him out of the corner of my eye. He was just there, standing. When I turned to look, he was gone!”
“I saw that thing too! The shadow man!” Said Peter Swanson. “Damn thing was standing up in the corner, on the catwalk out in the main floor. Same thing. I was working, one of the cows didn’t go down right away, and I was leaning down to stun it again, then I felt real uneasy all of a sudden. Real scared. Finally I noticed the shadow up there!”
“That happened to me in the break room!” Said Juan Esposito. “I was eating lunch when I felt it. Then there was a shadow of a man, I think, in the corner of the room.”
“It was more of a shadowy blob on the wall for me,” said Polly.
“Any of you guys see the weird bird?” Asked Carlos Sanders. “I saw it once. End of my shift, back in 09. Me and a few of the boys saw it. You were there Juan! You remember?”
“I remember. I’m not really sure though, Carlos. That one might have been a vulture.”
“We see vultures round here all the time! That wasn’t a vulture! No clue what it was. Just some big flying shadowy thing that appeared at sundown and flew off after a while.”
“Lots of people said they saw a strange bird. That’s part of why some people think it’s cursed” claimed Jane Lopez. “I never worked there, but my husband used to tell stories. Some people say it’s an omen. If you see the bird over the slaughterhouse, something bad might be about to happen.”
“I remember the stories, Mama.” Said her son, Martin. “I worked the floor for three years. I never saw a creepy bird. I wonder if Papa was just telling stories again?”
“Maybe, mijo. But lots of people tell stories about that place.”
“How about the one cow that Mr. Kurt takes, like… once a week? Anybody know what’s up with that?” That was Juan again.
“No! And none of us can figure out where the cow goes either! It’s creepy!” Poly replied.
That’s when Willard loudly cleared his throat. Willard was a tough looking old bastard. Usually sporting a frumpy tank top, a grumpy face, and a bottle of something in one hand. “Y’all didn’t work there as long as I did,” he grumbled in his raspy old voice. He kept his head and eyes lowered, like some old cowboy trying to be dramatic. “Y’all know who that shadow even is? I know the ‘sh’tory!”
We were all interrupted by a shout from a very angry Petunia, who was a few yards away manning the grill. “DAMN IT Willard! What did I say!? One beer! One!”
“I only had one! I ‘sh’wear!”
“You’re slurring! If I catch you sneaking any more drinks I’m not giving you any ribs or any cookies!”
Willard’s tough old man act crumbled as he went wide eyed at the mention of cookies. “Alright, alright, I’m sorry Petty…”
“PETUNIA!!”
“Petunia! I won’t have anything else to drink!”
“Damn right! Last thing we need is you making an ass of yourself again!”
Willard sighed as we all hushed a few guffaws. “Anyway,” he said after an awkward pause. That shadow? Any of you know who it is?”
“One of the dead owners?” Said someone.
“One of the dead workers?” Said someone else.
“Nah, nah. It was the FIRST owner. The ghost of Heinrich Schroeder. The builder and owner of Schroeder Slaughterhouse!”
“How do you know?”
“I mean… I don’t, but that’s the oldest story I know about the place. Don’t any of you younguns know about the history there?”
“I don’t. Please tell the story!” I called from outside the circle of former Meat Processing workers, causing some of them to glance awkwardly at me.
“Well alright then!” Willard said with a grin that had less than a full set of teeth. “The place was built way back, right after the Civil War ended, when a bunch of immigrants from Germany started migrating to Nebraska, mostly to Omaha. But one feller…”
“Why did Germans come to Nebraska?” Asked a kid who’s name I didn’t know.
“What? I dunno. They just did. Hush. So this guy saw our little town of Fallowveil and its lush fields. He was in the sausage business before, but figured he could set himself up a slaughterhouse to process cows raised locally. Old Fallowveil was superstitious though. They were always wary of outsiders.”
“Why?” The kid asked.
“They just was. Everyone was after the war ended. Things changing fast, bunch of black folks are citizens and building themselves North Mainstreet, and Fallowveil’s weird. We all know that. Always has been.” Nobody could disagree there. “So. Since they were wary? They didn’t want to let Shroeder build. Supposedly you can find old documents with the town's rejection letters to Shroeder hidden away in the office of the old building. He tried for months. Then, with no explanation at all, they suddenly sold him an unused parcel of land. Nobody knows why, and that’s where a lot of folks think the devil’s curse began. They say Shroeder made some kind of deal with a demon to get them to sell the land to him. They’re the ones that made him follow their rules. Everyone remember the rules?”
“Hell, I had to follow those rules,” said Polly. “Most were pretty standard health and safety measures, but some were downright bizarre. 1. No loud noises in the back of the building. 2. One cow will be selected by the owner for personal reasons and won’t be slaughtered with the others. 3. Keep the blood drains clean at all times, but no specialized detergents. 4. Never agitate the animals. 5. Manure will be transported offsite. 6. Anyone caught past the fence line of the old building will be fired immediately…. There’s a bunch more that are all basically fcc regulations, only these days there’s extra.”
“It’s worth it!” Juan piped in. “The work we do there now got us awards! We make some of the best meat in the country! Pay is good too. No offense, friends, but we’re thinking of moving into a house, soon!”
Petunia cried out. “Ahhh Juan! That’s so wonderful! You’ll have places for your baby!” A bunch of others offered Juan their congratulations. There were also expressions of sadness. Thanks to Petunia? This neighborhood is really tight knit.
“We’ll miss you!”
“When do you leave?”
So on and so on. Juan’s a nice guy. I never got to know him, and I kinda wish I had now.
“Good to hear that place is finally shaping up!” Willard said with a small smile. “Maybe the curse on the place is lifting! Back when I worked there, safety and cleanliness were shit. All them extra rules about keeping the place clean, and the cows cared for, they weren’t there back then. Just the weird shit about noise in the back, staying away from the old building, and one cow being taken away every couple of shipments.”
“Can I ask a question?” I asked as Willard trailed off, lost in thought.
“Did you ever work in the place, new guy?” Asked Juan.
“No. I’m just curious about Fallowveil’s spooky stories. Lived here for a while, and heard em, but now I’m asking around. Also, how am I still the ‘new guy?’ I’ve lived here three years!”
“You stopped coming outside after three months!” Petunia called to me.
“Whatcha want to ask?” Willard wondered.
“Well, why is the old building even still there? The place where you all work is the building in the front, right? New building with state of the art equipment? Why keep the dilapidated old building from the 1860s? Anybody know?”
“Ah. That’s an interesting question. I’d guess nobody here knows that answer, right?” Willard replied. There were nods all around. “Nobody alive today worked in that building. Hell, it was fenced off and boarded up when I was a kid. Nobody really knows why it’s still standing. We all have our guesses. Some think it might have something to do with the devil’s curse. Some say the owners hope to cash in on its historic value. Not sure how. The place is a wreck. So it just sits back there.”
“And they’ll fire anyone who gets curious,” Polly added.
“Exactly. That’s one of the rules. Stay away from the old building. But anyway. Let me get back to the story. The old building, that’s the slaughterhouse built by Heinrich Shroeder. He ran the place for about twenty years. Lot of the newly freed black folks would work there. Nothing too nefarious went on back then, but all the same, everyone felt uneasy working there. Just like now, workers swore they saw ghosts. Place gained a reputation for being haunted. That only got worse over the years. Then came the ‘incident.’ I don’t remember the exact year. But at some point some kind of fire broke out in the slaughterhouse. It was after hours so there were no workers there at the time, but there was a herd of cows waiting there overnight. The fire only affected the inside of the building, but it still spooked the cows. They stampeded out of the pen and the next morning the town had cows everywhere. When the people searched the slaughterhouse, they found that not much of the equipment was damaged at all. Somehow some small section of the floor had lit up. And in the middle of it? They found the charred bones of Heinrich Shroeder.”
“What? How?” I asked skeptically. “You know how hot a fire has to be to melt off everything but bone? I don’t. But I know it’s pretty hot.”
“Oh I know. That’s part of the mystery. Nobody knows what happened. It was like some little explosion of heat just burned everything in this one spot on the floor, including Shroeder. The whole thing is unsolved. A mystery. Maybe it was arson. Maybe it was some sort of accident. Who knows? Anyone who works there could tell you though. That place is cursed. Our theory was, Heinrich went back on whatever deal he made to get the land, and the devil came to collect. Either way, the whole town was in shock. Shroeder’s family buried him at Kugler Mill Cemetery, then sold the place and moved to Omaha to be closer to family.”
“Who bought it next?” Asked the kid that kept asking questions.
“Local man named Jefferson. He moved to Nebraska from the south after the war. Man was a slave owner who had a lot of trouble turning a profit after the war.”
“Also a horrible racist!” Petunia added from the grill. “You left that part out one time.”
“I did not! I didn’t think I had to say it! I said he owned slaves! Of course he’s racist!” Willard shot back.
“Just messing with you, you old cowpoke.” We all stopped to chuckle.
“ANYWAY. Jefferson was no great boss. Lot of stories about cruelty to workers and animals if the stories I once heard are true. He kept the name “Schroeder Slaughterhouse to keep some locals from realizing it was him. That’s how he hired a bunch of black folks. There were lots of accidents. Almost everyone who worked there left missing a limb, like me.” Willard held up his hand, and I noticed for the first time that he was missing two fingers on his right hand. “They were still using old band saws. Only took one wrong move” he added thoughtfully. “So Jefferson took over, but he kept all the weird old rules. Nobody knows why. But the place wasn’t a great place to be. Another fire broke out, this one was the Jeffersons son getting drunk on the floor and lighting a lantern. Three workers died there. There were other injuries, and shitty safety standards. One other stampede occurred, which was caused by the equipment falling apart cuz they never bothered with maintenance. You get the idea. All the while, everyone kept hearing tales about the ghosts. They eventually got the idea that the “rules” had something to do with the ghosts. People swore when they were louder in certain parts of the building, they were more likely to feel uneasy. We all know that story.”
“The Shadow” several people said in unison.
Willard nodded. “People thought it was the ghost of Shroeder. Made the rumors about a curse seem more real. The Jeffersons ignored their employees' discomfort for years. Then in the in 30s, another tragedy struck. The owner, Edgar Jefferson, personally came to oversee the installation of a brand new state of the art meat grinder to produce ground beef for local businesses. He was standing nearby, even though the construction crew told him to move away. He was bragging to news outlets and investors about his new machine, and how he wasn’t affected by the depression at all, and then, out of nowhere, a small earthquake hit. The meat grinder came loose from its crane and landed right on top of Edgar. He died immediately. Right in front of the terrified crowd.”
“No way.” Said someone from the crowd.
“Y’all can look this one up if you want. Library is bound to have the old papers. I heard this story from my very first boss. He was just a kid at the time. Said his dad witnessed the whole thing. One second Edgar was boasting, next, he’d been turned into meat jelly.”
“Please don’t ruin the barbecue, Willard” called Petunia.
He just rolled his eyes at that. “To make matters worse, the Jefferson’s local estate mysteriously caught fire a few days later. Nobody could find a cause. Nobody died, thankfully. The remaining Jefferson’s were spooked after that. They sold the slaughterhouse as well as four different cattle farms in town, and moved out of the state.”
“Who was next?” Came the child.
Willard ignored him. “The next person to buy the land was an industrialist who wanted to stake a claim on small town businesses. Rick Manson. He owned a restaurant in California. He bought up the cattle farms and built a new state of the art slaughter house right next to the old one. He was held up by world war 2, but when that ended, he got the place up and running. Nobody knows why he didn’t just tear the old building down and build on top of it. He was the first owner to leave it be. Supposedly, things started out decent under Manson. He brought lots of decent paying jobs raising cows and working in the slaughterhouse, and he kept the rules and added more for safety. Ran it like that for a good thirty years. That’s about when I started working there. Late seventies, early eighties. I can say without any doubt, that any good things people said about Rick Manson? They were lies. The man was a tyrant of a boss, at a time when we actually knew what hard work was.” I felt everyone else groan with me when Willard said that. “The guy used the cheapest equipment he could find and barely ever did maintenance. He also kept hiring immigrants to work the floor. The injury rates were incredibly high, and whatever workarounds higher ups thought they could get away with, they did. A lot of that was on the farms. The local farms were soon forced to use growth hormones, cheap corn feed, and other shady tactics to fatten the cows up faster. They made every effort to turn the small town of Fallowveil into a bigger meat processing plant. We all suffered for it. People died working in that place. Even more people lost fingers. And nobody ever held Manson accountable. Let me remind you, the place was still unbelievably haunted. The shadow was seen by everyone. People started seeing the weird bird too. Everyone was also pretty sure the owners were doing some kind of satanic rituals in the old building at night. There were stories about lights and weird sounds. The story me and my fellow workers believed was that the one cow that got selected and separated every now and then? They were sacrificing it in the old building.”
That proved a bit too much for me. “Wait… hang on. The place is already a slaughterhouse. Cows die there daily. What’s so special about this one cow? Do others not count?”
“Oh how am I supposed to know? You wanted to know what the stories were right? That’s all we got, nobody actually knows what’s going on in there. All we got are guesses. All we know is that someone always showed up, maybe once a week, and picked out a cow, and lead it away. We’re busy workers so no, none of us ever really saw where it ended up. We’re pretty sure it wasn’t put back on a truck. There’s no hidden field that we know of where they’re keeping them. So where the hell do these cows go?”
“I mean… I don’t know. Do they still do that?” I asked.
Juan answered me. “Yes. I’ve seen it happen. Mr. Kurt is the man who picks the cow. Once a week he picks a cow and leads it away from the others. Usually toward the back. Whenever we ask him where the cow went, he would just say ‘that’s private.’”
“Who the hell is Mr. Kurt?” Willard asked.
“He’s basically the general manager. He’s there everyday.”
“What about the new owner? ‘Antoora’ or however you say that?”
“Antuara. We don’t know. Nobody but Mr. Kurt has met him. It’s really strange. Kurt just says Antuara is a bit of a recluse.”
“Wouldn’t the FDA want to know what was happening with these cows?” I wondered.
“All the paperwork is done. The FDA has been here multiple times. They know one cow gets taken, and… they’ve signed off on everything. So I guess it’s nothing illegal.” Juan concluded with a shrug. “It’s really weird.”
“Huh. That place is just a giant old mystery. Does it ever end? You all know what happened to Mr. Manson?”
“Didn’t he die in a fire?” Asked Polly.
“Not just him. My last boss was the one that noticed this. But right before Mr. ‘Antoora’ bought the place ten years ago, it got bought up by a bunch of corporate goons. They wanted to compete with places like Tyson meats. They bought it after Manson's car was found exploded… with him in it, of course. That’s three different owners who were hit by fires, and two that were killed by fires. But that’s not all. Polly? You worked as floor manager while those corpo guys ran the place right? You remember why they ended up selling?”
“I was never told, actually. You and the boys had your stories, but I always figured it was our numbers. We weren’t doing as well. People weren’t going to local butchershops. I know there was one death…”
“It was another fire. And from what I hear it was ruled as an arson! To this day it hasn’t been solved. There were three deaths like that. And a meat packing plant in another state burned down. Not all of those were ruled as arson, but it’s a hell of a coincidence, wouldn’t y’all agree?” Willard said with a grin as he searched everyone’s faces. He had everyone enraptured by his mystery.
“It’s like the place really is cursed. Whoever owns Shroeder slaughterhouse… catches fire?” Said someone.
“Sure seems that way.”
“But Antuara is different. All the equipment is new, and he trained all of us extensively. We take breaks. We’re required to take breaks. And we clean everything. Then there’s the farms he bought. They don’t use any growth hormones or cheap feed. Hell, Mitchel Farm has enrichment toys for them. If the place was cursed, I have to hope it’s lifted now.” Juan spoke with conviction.
“But you still see the shadow and the bird, right? And nobody knows what happens to the one cow?” Willard said simply.
“Yes. That is true. Mr. Kurt has said he’ll look into the things that are causing our discomfort. But what can anyone do about a ghost?”
“Like I said. That place is cursed by the devil. Years of cruel practice, spilled blood, and bad deals. The owners get burned, the workers suffer, but it just keeps churning out meat. And of course, it’s here in the town of Fallowveil, where witches roam free…”
“As do old assholes” added Petunia
“The woods have a monster, the Hotel is in the damn Twilight Zone, and everyone’s seen something unnatural. The place is still cursed, mark my words. Unless they tear that old building down, it’ll probably stay cursed.” With that, Willard concluded his story. He raised a bottle of beer to his lips, but before he could drink, Petunia appeared and swatted the bottle right out of his hand.
“What the hell did I tell you Willard. No more god damn beer!”
“Sorry Petunia.”
The rest of the day was nice. I ate food, hung out with neighbors, played some horseshoes, drank some beer. It was great. The circle of meat packing workers had a few more tales, mostly about the Shadow showing up to scare people, or a weird thing someone saw around the old building.
I wasn’t sure what to think, really. I’ve never actually been to the place. I know that working in a slaughterhouse sounds like a really depressing, dangerous, and messy job that I never ever want. That’s for sure. I had no idea missing limbs were so common.
I looked up some of the stuff Willard said. It seems he wasn’t embellishing much. There really were owners who died in fires and one who got squashed by his own equipment. I can see where belief in a curse comes from. Interestingly, Juan was right too. Fallowveil has received awards for its high quality beef in recent years. The stuff is so good that some of the food network shows have started showing up to do segments and visit local restaurants. Mostly Nerd Burger. Nerd Burger is incredible. The Spicy² burger is hands down, the best burger in the universe and nobody will tell me otherwise. I didn’t even realize it contracted with Antuara meats, but there you go.
I shared all of this with Trista later that night, and as a result, we went on adventure together. I wonder if it was a date? She wore her regular clothes. Try to imagine a sixties Hippy who got a makeover from a goth. She wore a sarong around her waist that would dance around her legs, with the breeze. It was black as pitch, with a few flowery designs sewn in. She also wore a black hand made tank top, black knee high boots, and her stoner beanie hat that read “total witch.” Seriously. How else can I describe that other than Hippy/goth or Hippy/vampire. She’s weird, and she’s really skinny, but damn it… she’s really pretty. And a lot of fun to hang out with. She might have supplied us with something to smoke that may or may not be legal in this state so I’ll say no more there.
But anyway, we were chatting after sundown, and I told her all about the stories of the Slaughterhouse. “Ugh. That place. Look at me. I’m a hippy. I can’t call myself a vegan, but I still morally oppose the meat industry.”
“Why can’t you call yourself a vegan?”
“I… have a specialized diet.”
“What’s that mean?”
“None of your business, jerk!” She socked my shoulder playfully, which made my whole arm go numb.
“Ow! You are like 140 pounds, max. How are you so damn strong?”
“Maybe you’re just weak. So the slaughterhouse is cursed? Wanna go see it?”
“I… like… Right now?”
“Sure! You don’t work for another hour, right? The hotel can manage without me if I’m late by a few minutes. Come on! I hear you’re more likely to see weird things if you go at night!”
How could I say no? So I drove us to Antuara Meats, formerly known as the Schroeder Slaughterhouse, and got a look at it for the first time in my life. The main building is pretty unremarkable. Just a factory type building next to a big field. We pulled into the parking lot and got as close to the fence as we could, so we could see what we really wanted. The old building.
“Christ. Why is it still standing? Place looks like it should be condemned.” Trista said as we got out and peered through the fencing.
“Yup. Boarded up windows, overgrown ivy everywhere, everything one needs to make a nice creepy atmosphere.”
“How romantic!” She quipped. I’m glad she couldn’t see the confused blushing I did after that. “It definitely smells like blood and rot around here.”
“It does? All I smell is… I’m guessing that’s cow poop?”
“No. It’s metallic. Smells like old blood.”
“You are such a vampire.”
“Har har.”
“Seriously, I don’t smell blood. I can’t see much. It’s too dark.”
“Not much to see. Though I think I see the cow.”
“The cow? What cow? And no way in hell can you see out here. There’s clouds out!”
“Eat your vegetables Mason. It’s good for your night vision.”
“Vampire says what?”
“Nope.”
“So you see a cow? A live cow? Where? Maybe I have a night vision app or something. I dug my phone out of my pocket.
“Yeah, there’s a cow standing out behind the old building. Maybe a hundred yards.”
“I don’t care how good your night vision is, how could you see that far?”
“Will you give it a rest? Not my fault my eyes adjust better than yours.”
“Sorry. Didn’t mean to be an ass…”
“It’s okay Mason, I’m mostly messing with you. There is a cow there though.”
I held up my phone and zoomed as far as I could with the night vision on. She was right. A loan cow stood in an open field behind the slaughterhouse. There were no fences back there, so I wondered if it had gotten loose and just wandered its way to the spot. “Huh. You’re right. There’s totally a cow there. It’s not on the property either.”
“So… you found the missing cow. But I gotta ask. You doing okay? That shit with the Red Nights club was crazy. Anyone would be messed up after that.”
That annoyed me. I’m not sure why. “You think I’m messed up?”
“Well, yeah, that’s why I hang out with you. We’re both messed up. But like… this is seriously messed up. Not fun messed up.”
“Is that the only reason we came out here? Did Petunia put you up to this?” I turned toward her.
“Yes. But no. Petunia is worried about you. And so am I. You’re one of the few regular friends I’ve got. And someone almost shot you.” I saw genuine concern in her violet eyes. She stood there, twiddling nervously with her hands, only partly illuminated by the nearby streetlights, making her pale complexion shine. A strange gust of wind kicked up and blew her wavey Raven black hair prettily across her face.
Oh fuck. You’re getting feels. Stop that. You’re just lonely, and she just feels bad. I wrestled with my thoughts for a moment before replying. “I’m sorry. Maybe I’m just burying it. I’m okay. At least I think I am. Maybe I'm still processing.”
“Uh. Hold that thought, Mason. The cow is gone.”
“What?” I looked back and held up my phone. There was no cow in the field anymore. “Where? How? There’s nowhere for it to go!?”
“I didn’t see anything. It was there a minute ago, now it’s just gone. Wow. That’s creepy. This place really is cursed.”
“Could it have fallen in a hole or something?”
We actually spent a few minutes searching for a trace of the bovine, but we didn’t find anything. There’s no way the thing ran off in just a minute. So what the hell happened to it? It just vanished. Both of us felt a little unsafe after we reached that conclusion. So we headed home and then went off to our respective jobs. Now here I am. A fully grown cow disappeared before my eyes at a haunted slaughterhouse, and somehow I’m still more concerned with whether or not I should ask Trista out or just enjoy her friendship. But that shit is my business.
I did a bit more reading about the slaughterhouse. police have been called to the place over the years, and they found nothing. There’s even been people that signed papers and got to enter the building legally. There was even a ghost hunter once. They didn’t really find anything interesting either. There’s something weird about that place though. No doubt about it. It’s brought tragedy, creepy stories, and delicious hamburger to our town for generations. Given how delicious locally raised beef is? I'm cool with the place doing whatever it’s doing.
The Ridiculously Sexy Neighbor
The Haunted Slaughterhouse
The Weird Nocturnal Hippy Chick

Hi all, first time posting in this sub but found some of the advice really helpful planning for our trip, so thought I'd post our trip report.
A bit about us: Two late 20's Brits, husband and wife team. Mixed levels of fitness - we lift weights in the gym 5 days a week, and my wife additionally plays rugby with training/games 2-3 times a week (I coach). We both work 9-5 deskjobs. Interests include food, videogames, anime and history.
The trip: 10th April: Flew business class with JAL from LHR to HND. Flying business class was a bucket list thing for us, and we'd saved up a lot of money during Covid even with a marriage and a house move. Overall it was a great experience, but I'm a light sleeper and couldn't sleep a wink on the plane. Watched season 1 of SpyxFamily which became the anime of the trip, as we'd watch Seasons 2 and 3 before getting to bed most nights.
11th April: Landed at 7:40am at HND and set up our Ubigi eSims. My advice would be to set it up before you fly, as connecting to the Wifi at HND was a bit troublesome. On the whole, though, Ubigi was great - decent connection throughout and only lost connection in some tunnels, or in a couple of spots in Akihabara.
Got Suica cards at Terminal 3 and dropped luggage off at our hotel (Hotel Gracery Shinjuku). Was cool being in the Godzilla hotel on the Godzilla floor - room was pretty big and you get some good views from the 30th floor. Loved the iconography on the walls of various kaiju's in the Godzilla franchise (King Ghidorah, Rodan etc.), the iconography on the lift doors, and there's a panorama in the hotel lobby, too.
Went for a walk around Shinjuku and Shinjuku Gyoen garden whilst we waited to check in and were lucky enough to see the various cherry/plum (I think?) blossoms in the park. We had planned the trip knowing we were missing the blossom season, so to see some in full bloom was great. We'd grabbed some onigiri from a 7-11 and had a picnic on a bench under the trees. Grabbed Shinkansen tickets for a couple of days time in the Green Car from Shinjuku station, which was hassle-free. Checked into hotel, then went to find some food. Booked online at Teppanyaki Hama which was literally down the street, and what an experience that was. Only 12 seats in total at the restaurant, and we were treated to the chef cooking right in front of us a variety of 9 courses from roe, to oyster, lobster, snail and the best grilled veg I've had. Cost about £216 from memory, but it set the tone of the trip really well.
12th April: woke up early and got to Meiji Jingu for about 7am. We enjoyed how quiet it was, with only a handful of tourists at this time. We then went to a Family Mart and came back to Meiji Jingu (with the intention to eat breakfast in the park) at 8:30am, but all the tourists had arrived by then and we could see no food/drink signs so we moved on to Yoyogi Park which was also lovely.
Next we did Harajuku and I visited the Asics store there. Was disappointed at how touristy the area seemed even at 10/11am. At this time, it started to rain and, with not much appealing to us, we moved on to Shibuya. Did Shibuya scramble a few times for the fun of it, then grabbed lunch at Ichiran. Decent ramen, better than the chain ramen we get in the UK (I'm looking at you, Wagamama's) but not the best of the trip. Explored Shibuya and saw the Pokemon Centre there with Mewtwo, and then the One Piece and Jump stores too. We went to Sushiro for dinner. Ate about 15 plates between us for roughly £26 with drinks. First ever conveyor belt sushi experience and had to wait about 30 mins for a seat. Was pretty cool. Rounded off the day wandering Golden Gai and Kabukicho near the hotel.
13th April: had planned to explore Nakano Broadway and Ikebukuro this day but...
I was ill all day and after being up and down during the night, spent all day in bed. My wife was fine, so I either overate, felt jetlagged, stressed from overplanning, ate something my wife didn't (likely sea urchin at Sushiro), or a bit of everything. My wife went to Gotokuji temple in the afternoon and explored some of the neighbourhoods to find an Airbnb which a Youtuber she follows, owns. My illness put me off of seafood for most of the trip, which is unfortunate as I love seafood, but the smell of it just put me off on this trip.
14th April: took the 6:33am Shinkansen to Kyoto. This was awesome, and watching the Japanese countryside go by with the mountains in the background was something I'll never forget - it's so much more picturesque than from UK trains. We were lucky to see Mt. Fuji from the train as well, as we knew she was usually shy, but that morning she looked majestic.
Popped by the hotel so they knew we were in the neighbourhood (Yoin Hotel Kyoto Gion). Hotel was a bit disappointing. Largest hotel room of the trip (save for the ryokan) but it was only 4/5 storeys high so had a lot of noise from the road below from loud tourists at 1am.
We explored Gion district. Visited Chion-in which was brilliant, saw different delegations of monks and even a bit of their ceremonies when we were there. Also did Yasaka Shrine, Yasaka Pagoda, and Kiyomizu-dera (too crowded by the time we did it), and grabbed some lunch at Smile Burger. Smile burger was great, a small burger joint which did simple burgers that tasted good for a great price. We then took a break at Ryozen Kannon temple. Ate dinner in our room with some of the ekiben boxes I didn't eat for brekfast as I still felt iffy.
15th April: originally planned to do Fushimi Inari this day but instead took a trip to Nara as I wasn't feeling a 5am wakeup after being unwell. Nara was lovely, but again loads of tourists by 8am. Fed the deer, and loved how the vendors all charged the same and how part of the money goes towards conservation. We went to Kofuku-ji and then grabbed breakfast at a conbini next to the famous TikTok mocchi making place, then sat at Sarusawa-ike watching the Terrapins to eat. It was so peaceful here, away from the hustle and bustle of the tourist parts. Then visited Todaiji Temple and explored Nara park. Then, we hopped on a train to visit the old Imperial Palace of Nara with the intention of seeing all Imperial Palaces in the cities on our trip. Admittedly not much at the site but it was cool seeing the old buildings and some of the conservation work being done. Then, on a whim, we went to Uji at 3:30pm and again, it was away from the hustle and bustle of tourists. I dislike green tea and matcha, but my wife likes it so thought it'd be good to try. We found a cafe overlooking the river and got there at last orders. Admittedly, I didn't like anything on the menu but that's just my taste and dislike of matcha. We left Uji and found a Wagyu steak yakiniku place in Kyoto called Douraku Kyotorokkakudoriten. Had a whole board of Wagyu fillet, tongue, cheek, rib etc. for about £89 and we got to cook it ourselves. This was a treat, and I've never tasted beef so good - it literally melted in our mouths. We left very satisfied after getting a side order of rice and bimbap, too.
16th April: Tackled Fushimi Inari this day as I was getting my groove back. Got to the foot of Fushimi Inari at 7:30am and it was already packed with wannabe influencers - I could tell this was going to be fun...my wife and I like hillwalking and occasionally walk Bennau Brycheniog or the Lake District, so we can hike at a good pace. We passed many people getting irate over the number of people getting in their shots (what did you expect?) and even one woman walking in a dress and stilettos with her partner carrying a tripod!! Madness. The crowds did thin considerably once we hit the part where the path splits in two, and we got all the way to the top in 55 mins. We bought a tori gate from one of the stalls neat the top after waiting around for 25 mins for it to open, and we had our names and date painted on it in kanji. Certainly take some time to see the various shrines in the small paths off the main track, as they're so picturesque and peaceful. Shoutout to Pocari Sweat, which kept me fuelled this entire time whilst recovering from the lurgies.
We walked down the mountain pass at the back, past a small bamboo grove, and here I jumped with glee as I heard a school bell go which had exactly the same tone and tune as the one from the 'Izekai Quartet' anime. From here, we did Tofuku-ji as it was on the way back into town along the path. What was really nice was seeing the backstreets of Japanese society, so tranquil and well-kept (like it was straight out of an anime). We then grabbed some lunch at a Korean hotpot place in Kyoto station, and did Kyoto tower on a whim. I suffer from vertigo and 'call of the void' (where I want to jump off of high places just to know what the sensation is like) and they were pretty bad at the top of Kyoto Tower as I felt like the tower was shaking in the wind. Still, the views were great and I'm glad I did it. They had a stand/vending machines of 'Sound Euphonium!' merch, which is an anime I love as a former brass band player, so got some photos next to Kumiko and Reina. We then went on an hours detour just so my wife could find another Pokelid and ended up in a park watching the Shinkansen go by. We grabbed dinner in an udon place called Udon Shiogama round the corner from the hotel which did curry udon. My goodness it tasted so good! The rich, spicy sauce went so well with the juicy udon I can still taste it. It's about on par with a Jalfrezi or a hot tikka spicewise, so if you can't do spice it may not be for you, but my wife had tempura udon ramen which she said was also as excellent.
17th April: trip to Osaka. I originally wanted to go to Himeji castle given the advice on this sub, but my wife didn't want to go too far astray so instead we went to Osaka castle at 9am. It was nice to see the museum inside of it and was very informative. From there, we went to Dotonbori and tried the best Takoyaki from a place right outside Osaka-Namba station with a massive crab on top. Also tried melonpan with vanilla ice cream inside it (a game changer) and Okonomiyaki at Mizuno Okonomiyaki which was brilliant. Went for the seafood option (risky given recent events) but it was so tasteful. Top tip would be to get here early at 5pm to avoid much of a queue, as only a limited number of seats and they cook it up in front of you. Then went to find the Osaka Pokemon Centre as my wife wanted to see that. Eventually headed back to Kyoto at about 9pm.
18th-19th April: Kinosaki Onsen
We wanted to do a ryokan/onsen experience as part of the trip but I wanted to get away from the crowds, so avoided Hakone. A friend had gone to Kinosaki so I decided to as well. Took us 3 hours to get there from Kyoto so set off at about 9am and the scenery out the window as the local trains go through the mountains was beautiful. Got to Kinosakionsen at midday and grabbed lunch at Kinosaki Burger by the station. Best burger of the holiday, hands down. Japan does simple burgers, but it does them well. It doesn't overcomplicate them by adding in more ingredients/foods, they're just a solid good burger. This is no different, but their chips were the best chips I've tasted. Cooked to order, cripsy on the outside, fluffy on the inside and seasoned generously with salt. At 2pm we checked into the ryokan (Nishimuraya Honkan Ryokan) and got changed into our Yukatas and getas. We had the suite room so we had the highest room in the ryokan. Went to Kouno-ko onsen to try it out and didn't get weirded out by the amount of people there and being completely naked around them. Top tip - if you wear glasses, take them off as it can help with an 'if I can't see them, they can't see me' mentality. Had fun walking in getas - how anime characters run, fight and kick in those things will remain a wonder to me (looking at you, Elfman from Fairy Tail).
Had kaiseki dinner in the ryokan which was so good! Fresh crab, cold sakura noodles, sashimi, grilled salmon...divine. Went for a late walk in the town as it was lit by lanterns and it was so picturesque. I estimate maybe 50 tourists in total within the town on this Thursday evening? It was great. Went for a dip in the onsen within the Ryokan - it has two onsens, one male and one female, which alternate each morning. Both onsens are done in different styles, too, one Japanese and one Greco-Roman. Learning the history of Kinosakionsen was also cool, with healing storks and praying monks with a history spanning over 1400 years.
The next morning we ate breakfast in our room and after another dip in the ryokan onsen, again on a whim, did the Kinosaki ropeway. You could see the Sea of Japan at the top along with shrines to crabs and other Buddhist deities. We stopped halfway down to see the Onsen temple which I believe had nightingale flooring. The monk there was brilliant with even very broken English, gave us a leaflet with info on it, and let us roam. We missed the 12:10pm gondola down so were stranded midway until 12:50pm, but it was nice to take the time to smell the flowers as we heard more Isekai Quarter schoolbells ring, trains zip along the valley below us, birds singing their song as the gentle breeze tickled us. I'll never forget that moment.
Upon getting down from the ropeway, we stopped off at Kinosaki Burger again before getting the train to Kyoto. We went to Pontocho alley for some grub and along a backstreet, stumbled upon Restaurant Muni which is a French/Japanese place. Looks to be a father and son operation and we were the first ones there ar 6pm. They recommend 2-3 plates per person for 2 people. I started with the Japanese beef curry which was just right, and the wife had omurice. I then had grilled duck which was cooked to perfection, before I ended with omurice whilst my wife had a pork cutlet sandwich. All meals were divine and tasted good, think the bill was near enough £100 but in our minds, it was worth it. Reminded me of Yokihira Soma's restaurant in 'Shokugeki no Soma' (Food Wars) a bit with the dynamic of the chefs and the menu, but it gets 5 stars from me. From there, we sauntered along the river and took in the atmosphere, seeing the buildings all lit up.
20th April: Decided to skip Arashiyama bamboo forest as I was tired of tourists by this point (yes, I realise the irony that I am myself a tourist) so instead we hopped on a bus and headed straight to Kinkaku-ji. Even at 9:05am there's so many tourists and we were herded through narrow paths. Was nice for a quick photo op but it suffered from overtourism. We then went to Heian shrine on a whim which was so quiet! I loved the red wood and the green roofs of the buildings. We also did the gardens which were my favourite gardens of the trip. We fed the koi carp (and a turtle) for 200 yen and even saw a Japanese wedding on the bridge - the groom was a handsome young man in his attire and the bride looked beautiful in hers. We did some shopping before getting dinner at CoCo curry. I was hungry, so went for extra pork cutlet, extra mushrooms, and spice level 5 and I struggled with the spice. It was one of the hottest dishes I've tasted, so if I were to go again I'd pick a milder level.
21st April: Took the bus to Nijo Castle and walked around the grounds. The grounds were lovely and the castle was cool too. Then hit up Kyoto Imperial Palace. Went to the Kyoto Pokemon Centre and then hit up Gyoza Dokoro Sukemasa. Got their Gyoza Set B menu which was 6 gyozas, miso soup, rice, string beans and chicken mayo salad for...880 yen. Bargain! The gyoza had hints of ginger in them which made them bright and freshing. So good! We then walked through Gion at night and took pictures of Nannenzaka, Sinnenzaka, and Yasaka Pagoda in darkness when illuminated by lights. Beautiful.
22nd April: Bullet train to Tokyo where we hit up Nakano Broadway and Ikebukuro. We were disappointed by both - Nakano Broadway just felt like multiple Mandarake stores, and Ikebukuro didn't have much aside from Sunshine City. We then hit up Akihabara in the afternoon and loved it. We went for dinner at Kanda Matsuya which was a lovely pre-war building serving ramen. Loads of locals in here and the place was bustling which was great to see. Some great food too, at decent prices. Afterwards I stopped by the local MacDonalds to try their double Big Mac burger (4 burgers in a Big Mac bun) as it's such a novelty. Checked into our hotel (The Gate Hotel Kaminarimon) in Asakusa. Hotel was great, some lovely views on the 10th floor and a 2 min walk from Sennsoji Temple and Akihabara station. Our room was huge. Would recommend.
23rd April: did Sennsoji-Temple as it was right across the street from our hotel. It was pretty cool to see in the morning at 8am with barely any tourists around, though did get busy at 9am. Wandered the old streets of Akihabara and reflected at the shrines/memorials around Sennsoji. Had Tokyo Tower booked in the afternoon and almost died at being 350m up due to the vertigo, but managed to get my shit together for a photo on the green screen floor at 450m high (though did politely ask my wife to hurry up as I could sense the tower wobbling and I was freaking out). Grabbed curry udon by Skytree which was underwhelming compared to the one I had in Gion, then got some fresh Taiyaki in Asakusa and then some cute mango sorbet ice cream with eyes and biscuits by Canelé Créme Glacée. They donate 3 yen to a good cause for each ice cream bought, which was nice, especially as you get to choose which of the charities to donate it to.
24th April: Was going to do the Tokyo Imperial Palace but couldn't be bothered with the hassle of getting tickets. Did Ueno Park and the National History Museum instead and enjoyed a morning there, before hitting up Akihabara in the afternoon/evening. Did some crane games and played a Kantai Collection arcade game which was cool. Then played the Taiko(?) drumming game with the SpyxFamily and other anime tunes blaring out - awesome!
25th April - Akihabara. Enough said.
26th April - Had a reservation at a michelin star restaurant (another bucket list item for us) in Ginza so headed into Ginza for the morning. It was an interesting insight as to the other half of society lives, as we'd never been into any of the shops that surrounded the station. The michelin star experience at Ginza Toyoda was exceptional. Several courses at 30,250 yen each and had crab mince with ginger jelly served on a crab shell, tiger prawns, sashimi, sea urchin and abalone...sublime! We spoke a bit of Japanese with the chef, who said we spoke good Japanese for first-timers (albeit this was said over trusty ol' Google Translate). Just made the experience so much better! Spent the evening in Akihabara and had Pork tonkatsu ramen in Yaro Ramen Akihabara. We then had a frozen strawberry crepe out of the nearby vending machine for the fun of it.
27th April: flew from HND business class with JAL.
Things to note:

• a bit of Japanese goes a long way. Simple phrases like 'hai', 'iie', 'sumimasen', 'gomenasai' and 'daijoubou' go a long way. Locals love it when you try to speak the language, and most of the time what they infer can be interpreted through their hand movements.
  
• carry around a plastic bag for your rubbish, as has been said plenty of times on the forum.
  
• the weather for the first week was about 20-26ºC, which did not help my wife or I whp had packed jeans, sweaters and down jackets. A trip to Uniqlo later had us buying shorts and Activism tshirts which were a godsend on the trip.
  
• Japanese public transport is second to none. It's clean, efficient, and usually on-time. Even the buses were well-labelled (we took the number 12 bus from Gion-in to Kinkaku-ji and Nijo Castle in Kyoto).
  
• be mindful of the Japanese culture, don't be loud, don't be a dick, always be humble and apologise if you think you're in the wrong. We did apologise plenty of times on the trip.
  
• Japanese schoolkids are adorable. They're young but behave so well, and take themselves to/from school alone. They navigate busy train stations solo, and do schoolwork on the train. They wear hats, and the lads wear shorts with high socks. Made my wife (a former teaching assistant) so happy seeing well-behaved kids. We saw some schoolkids on a trip at Osaka Castle and they were well behaved, lined up in single file, talking quietly and not getting in the way of tourists.
  
• We asked the hotels to forward our luggage between Tokyo-Kyoto and Kyoto-Tokyo. Cost us about £35 each time for 3 suitcases, with one of those days being on a Sunday. Arrived next day. We had Apple AirTags in each suitcase so we knew where they were.
  
• Google Maps on Android worked better than Maps on iOS, often with better signal and pathfinding.
  
• food was as expensive or inexpensive as we wanted it to be. Sure, we splashed out on several meals, but we tried to balance them with cheaper meals. I got addicted to Melonpan for breakfast when I was ill, and would double that up with pizza and fami-chicki for breakfast. Drinks-wise, Minute Maid was basically melted orange Calippo, Pocari Sweat was a mild lucozade original, and Calpis soda a muted lemonade. All were my top 3 drinks from vending machines/combinis. My wife loved the oolong green tea.
  
• the last few days in Tokyo we did have stuff planned, but we decided to focus on Akihabara to buy merch. Arguably taking these days at a slower pace was much nicer and enjoyable to what we had done in Kyoto.
  
• we averaged about 24,000 steps per day, with the highest being roughly 29,500 steps and the lowest about 12,000 steps. I wore New Balance 880 v12's and my feet were still sore after each day!
  
• Pokemon Centres personally became a bore after the second one as they sell the same merch more or less, with a few exclusives in certain stores. If you're a Pokénerd like my wife, you'll love it, but if you have no interest like me then you won't. We spent about 4 hours total in Pokemon stores across Japan, and a further couple of hours looking for Pokelids. All stores were out of stock of my favourite Pokemon (Alakazam - because he has spoons and is Gen 1).
  
• we only booked Tokyo Skytree and Ginza Toyoda before we flew. We booked a couple of restaurants the day of, after quickly browsing Google Maps or TripAdvisor.
  

Helpful Youtubers who provided insightful videos for the trip include AbroadinJapan, Cakes With Faces, CDawgVA, Tokyo Lens, Sharmelion to name but a few.
We're now looking to do another trip to Japan, maybe doing the Northern prefectures of Tohoku and Aomori, and Hokkaido. We'd love to go back to Kinosaki Onsen again, and spend more time in Tokyo. We're going to double-down on the Japanese language learning, too, as we can barely read Hiragana and Katakana to a worse extent.
Thanks for reading, I hope other first-timers found this insightful and I'm happy to answer any questions.

Looking for some ideas for a party I have coming up. I will have over probably 15-20 people I am looking to BBQ for. Thinking chicken wings/drumsticks and ribs. I am very confident in these two dishes but my problem is I can only smoke 1 at a time. I have a lil chief smoker (basically a tin box that doesn’t get hot enough to actually cook anything, just add smoke flavor) and ribs take ~7 hours, chicken ~3 hours before finishing on the grill. Trying to think how to keep the ribs while I smoke the chicken before starting both on the grill. I think very low oven would dry them out and not sure if fridge would be worth it. What do you guys think?
And before it is said, I know there are easier smoker setups and I would possibly be better off with a dedicated smoker but honestly I have learned to use this setup very well and I move every couple years so not looking for a big smoker at this moment.