Container for top of car

M21 I'm doubting if it was strict parenting or if it was the drink but I want opinions. She has done a lot but I don't feel entirely satisfied either. But in the days I have drafted this, my doubts only grow.
As a kid my mom hawked over me and now things I wish I could have experienced did not exist, like going to a park or playground with a friend without supervision, whereas she did. Going to the gas station for snack I couldn't, when she asked her parents and was given a quarter when everything was a cent. Riding a bike was limited to the street we live on, and when I was able to leave, I couldn't leave the neighborhood when she walked for a while to make sure her friend got home. Once sitting on my bike at the edge of the sidewalk and she walked over, cursed me out for going on a different street and wouldn't believe me. I couldn't go to a friends house because I was going to do my homework how my teacher taught me instead of hers, which I didnt know and was not taught. At a friends house, she berated me for making her wait in the car for a few minutes longer than the arranged pickup time. By comparison to what it would have been like, it is a magical opportunity lost.
For most of my school years, all I did was go to school, do homework and play games. Despite catching on to lessons quickly, classes were something to pass, nothing more, not even for life skills. Have a B? Make it an A. I did. Is the project due? Make it better. Alright. Taking orchestra and painting was fleeting then and while I enjoyed it, it was only done for practice or assignment. Now I am upset that it was all I did instead of going out and experiencing life: going out with friends, finding a club or sport to do, or just big activity sessions. Never had a curfew because I never left home to start. I may have had fun gaming then, but I lament heavy over that now to where I will not touch one. A future education and the future as a whole I should have taken a lot more seriously than I could possibly have imagined. School did push for it, but I was a fool and did not care.
Other than the occasional family visit, I did nothing and learned nothing. Never taught to cook much, properly clean, shop for necessities, make right finances, etc. Future prospects was left to whatever I would choose, which I would put it later down the road. Never got any real world experience and just been sheltered for so long, both by my doing and my moms. No drive to do anything, nothing of a hopeful future, no being pulled out of whatever I was doing to learn anything or having skills necessary in the world today be incentivized. Aside from making sure I did well in school, I was left to myself.
She always has something to complain about. Streaks of mean and grumpy. Remembered somethings of what we were interested in but other times just an empty face. Who my mom is today is doom and gloom, speaking two different points that are showing the worst of her and nitpicking over every possible detail. Most of who she enjoys in media has an underlying toxic presence to them with name calling. Polarize, prejudice, politicize, judge and bias everything. Norway and Iceland? Too cold and mountainous, how could anyone have settled there? Germany? They all speak the same language and cannot understand anyone in a city that is 30 minutes away. That guy's accent she can't stand and defaulted to being generated, even though he sounds the same speaking Finnish. All for a better planet yet everything is wasted, trashed, or sent to China. Treat others how you want to be and from where I stand, seem like a backtalking coward. Couldn't have a water pitcher because "no one refilled it" to keep the filter going when I made sure to keep it plentiful. If she has a problem she will bring up the one exact same example related to the topic that I have heard plenty before. And most of the negative aspects of society happen more likely than they should. All while bring home a 24, 30 or however many count of budweiser a week at least. I imagine we only got along because I wasn't a brat anymore and did not try to upset her. Falling in line if you will.
Emotions bottled or maybe emotionally dead. The masculinity trap of what is the general expectation of "men". To express myself, to show emotion, to even cry is something I don't want to do out of fear of being seen, which is ironic given the code of the samurai. 6th grade she didn't remember to pick me up even though I said and called and a friend and his friend caught me being emotional and stayed around a bit to comfort me.
The fear that was put into everything. An actual quote went something as "If you get hurt, I'm not going to drive you to the hospital". Another "All girls are evil". And "that sounds too confrontational" when I asked neighbors to clean after their dog. Even questioning if my eyes doing something required a doctor for her to say that my eyes will fail naturally and something about her relative who had an eye problem and didn't see a doctor. Things that made me not do the kinds of things I want to do now. I have been so sheltered then and now that I want to go out but there is the ever scared part of me towards the unknown world. I feel I have been prejudiced into thinking such ways but there's no personal experience to back or challenge said thoughts.
Admittably, parts of me are glad I know what I have and want for morals and mindset, but its also a matter of temptation and theres still so much that I wish to explore. At times I feel I matured too quickly at the cost of a kids stupidity or innocence and now am too serious and heavyhearted for my own good. To be told how I've matured when there wasn't much to mature from. A part of me feels that I have taken after her cold, judgemental, selfish attitude and that makes me fearful to screw up any kind of friendship or relationship, and dreading that I could reflect that onto any child I may have no matter how far away into the future I do have one. I kind of want to hate her but I am so emotionally gone or warped that I can't. If I "rebel" now, or begin to, I feel that might get the fire started.
She would argue with my dad from time to time but then that continued on for days and it was a cold environment lasting days to weeks after a fight. Even prior to their fights, they rarely slept together in the same bed, let alone the same room. She would critique his employer and even his choice of friends. Once he woke up late, thus having us late to get ready for school and she began one for that. I don't remember the exact details but she once criticized him over a coat he got me. All while listening from the top of the stairs to even the bottom where I was covered by a wall. A few times we listened and we made noise that I think made them aware of us but that didn't stop them. Even starting in our presence where we would leave the room. It got to the point where he actually packed lightly to leave for the night or days and my brother and I stopped him just so he could be home. I wish I did let him go then.
I really do believe I could have had it differently if my dad was alive. He made such an effort. When I was in hospital at 4, he made the efforts to get me out and moving around. When I didn't know a swim style, he literally chucked me towards the deeper waters (I was scared, but he was right in the end, one of the fondest memories). He taught me how to use the mower and had a mini shop set up in the garage. I played with him so much and he got me into the complex games he enjoyed as I got older. For as rough we were, he was so gentle. I looked up to him then and even more than ever now. He made the effort to be one worthy of "Dad" and he was damn well worthy of that and no one could be more better for me.
"Faded gray are all the days of yesteryears So much time has turned to memories and to tears" -Valkyrja
I did graduate HS 3 years ago, did a summer program and since nothing. No job, education chances, or life plans. Even though I felt smarter, I was turned off of college simply for cost reasons and "feeding the rich" mindset. Last summer I began to look at my past and future with a whole new look with no physical change taking effect. First week into March this year I realized what I have been doing compared to how others are living through good and bad and I fell into depression hard. Now it persists with great off and on. Where I have been up at 9 in the morning to suddenly be up at 5 or 6 in the afternoon. Throughout the past 3 years, there was no making sure I was ok, no seeing how I felt, no finding out what I wanted to do. And I am still frightened of what may be out there, even when that is the key to the living that I want. I want to go, I need to go. But where? I leave for the good and better of myself, but I also leave behind this place I've called home, yet it's now so far from the one I want to remember with a fond memory. So much happens that seems to have been "normal" when it doesn't seem like it should. The same place with the same inhabitants in the same motions. No going out, no difference, no change, and VERY artificial. Nothing means anything anymore. To let how I feel about the previous years subside in me or blow over...
Always have been insecure, hesitant, second guessing. While others had spent their 18s, 19s and 20s going into the world doing many things, I've had the summer program at 18, nothing at 19, and two days in the big city to attend a concert at 20. Little noteworthy moments under my belt. It seems like love in the immediate family was not two ways or had to be earned. I have not grown. Who I am is not who I want to be at heart.
For 21, I know I should have more skills and be in better places, but theres nothing from anyone. No check-in, no advice, no motivation. Like "the birdling will leave the nest" instead of anyone preparing a boy to what is before him. Its not a snap of fingers or blink of an eye do I learn what is expected. On the grown up part, I feel heavily underprepared for the world and life. Far too long have I stayed and lived in my head. I cannot understand why I am still at home, a part of myself thinks to keep the peace but what peace needs to be kept? Nothing and no one is stopping me from leaving except myself and the thought that they will most definitely want to know where I am if I go, which I do not want to tell anyone. Or that I've been sheltered and not have realised the gates have been unlocked long ago. Things are not ok and I want to stop pretending when I leave. Even with Spring's green grass under a blue sky that ends the day with the orange sunset piercing the clouds to make them blue and pink do I feel grey.
"Watching to the night with tired eyes Waiting for nothing all my life" -Battle Against Time
I feel the kid within me, wanting to do those exciting things, yearning for any kind of companion or fellowship. What daylight reveries I can conjure to make him feel hopeful enough so he can shine soon. The things I want to do to feel happy. I want to water that little guy.
A lot of this I have remembered recently and still am connecting the dots. I already am upset at myself for not doing anything in life, but I want to be angry and I honestly hate myself for not seeing this sooner and listening to her for so long. Despite feeling broken and defunct, I still feel young enough but there's been so little done that it feels many chances are long gone. There is more freedoms I have that I do not know about and ones that I have had before that gathered dust. And now I am in a toss up between beginning college preparation now, leaving states or the country to act on these now childhood regrets. I don't want to be who I am now any longer. I just want to do something. And in between it all, confusion of what to do, how to feel and saddened that I am not who I once was or could have been.

I love your big cheeks when you smile. You always wanted to get braces, but I love your teeth the way they are.
I love your soft heart. I’d always admire how you cry. I’m sorry I made you cry so much sometimes. I’m too much like my parents.
I love that you always want to grow and how you can look forward. I’m so proud of you. I’m so grateful I was there to see you get your degree, to see you move out, to be part of your life.
I love that you love yellow and sunflowers and the sky. You were always so bright. I also don’t like it now too, because whenever I see something happy, I think of you, and it makes me really sad. Being happy makes me sad.
If art was for me, music was for you. I miss hearing you hum and sing. You’re a great singer. I can’t listen to soft songs anymore.
I loved giving you my last bite every time. Sitting across from you made me happy. It was always enough for me to just be with you. I didn’t need any gifts or flowers or letters, but I got those too anyway.
Sometimes you’d slap your big belly, and I’d slap it too. I liked that. Do you remember when I’d cuff your sleeves before work? Or run to get your hairbrush one more time? How you’d scare me through the window while I washed the dishes? How I’d hug you at the door when you came home? Scrubbing your back in the shower? Waking you up just so I could remind you that I love you? I miss calling you over so you could just lay on top of me. When we rolled on the floor after moving into your new apartment.
My friends and family say I idealize you too much. But I don’t think so. I did the cliche thing, the important healing step, where I made a list of all the pet peeves and transgressions. But it didn’t feel right, hating you or villainizing you. You had your flaws, your quirks and those were fine with me. It just reminded me you were human. The weird way you sleep, how’d you get a little too angry at video games, how you’d be too anxious to go out sometimes. I love the human you.
Sometimes I wish you were horrible to me, to make this easier. Everyone else I talk to had horrible exes, mean ones. When I listen to their stories, it’s not you I think about. It’s me, maybe. Maybe that’s what I am to you.
I went to Chickfila and Cheesecake Factory on my own to try and replace our memories. I took myself to brunch and looked at the colors of the floor, the ceilings and the letters hanging on the wall to stay grounded. I browsed the shelves of the Korean Mart where I’d buy you snacks and looked at the chocolate bar selection at Aldi’s. I went to an arcade with new strangers I met and tried to win myself my own prize.
My therapist asked me to recall a happy memory, a content one. I told her about how I drove your car over the Golden Gate Bridge. We stopped at the viewing vista over the San Francisco Bay, and I kissed you on the cheek as I took a picture. It was my favorite picture of us, I had it printed so many times and pinned to my wall. In that memory, I felt safe, I felt warm, I felt content, I felt loved.
I hate how you said I never loved you, how I am unable to love. What is this feeling then? And where does this pain come from, if not my shattered heart?
Because I love you, I’m supposed to let you go. Be happy for you and send you off with love. But you’re not here anyway, so I hope it’s okay if I hold on for a little while longer. Write you a letter, or two, and look for you in every song lyric and in every flower by the street. Think of you as the clouds pass by and feel you in my chest when I find a laugh.

On Saturday, my (F/NB23) very close friend and coworker Hannah (F24) and her boyfriend Chris (M24) threw a late Cinco de Mayo party for a few of our coworkers and some of the girlfriends. There were 10 of us in total.
I was at the party from 7pm to 1am but the party lasted until 2am. Very important detail: I do not drink, and I was the only sober one. We've had plenty of parties before where I was the only sober one and we've never had any problems. Hannah was more trashed than normal this time though. When she's only drunk, Hannah is mostly herself but more goofy and loud. I learned on Saturday that when she is trashed, she's a completely different person. She is pushy, aggressive, and gets angry.
I'll do my best to properly paint the picture. We were all in the kitchen. 4 people were playing pong on the island, everyone else spectating. I was tucked in the corner of the counter, as in my ass was tucked in the L shape the counter makes. I was taking tons of pictures throughout the night, so I can easily recollect a lot of these details. At some point, Hannah turns around to talk to me. She puts her left arm on my right shoulder, pins me in the L-shape crook of the counter and presses herself against me. Immediately, she goes in for a kiss. I lean back, tell her no, and try to nicely get her off of me. Then she gets mad. Hannah says "What the hell!? My best friend and I make out all the time when we're drunk. Gimme a kiss," and immediately goes for it again. At that point, I push her off of me and walk to the other side of the apartment. In the moment, I was just like "that was weird as hell," but the more I thought about it, the worse I felt. All of this was right next to her boyfriend, and he didn't even react. Hannah left me alone after that.
Something I don't open up to a lot of people about is how many times I've been assaulted in my life. This is a bit out of character because I am such an open person about literally anything else. I cried to my mom about this today (the following Tuesday) and then admitted that I had been assaulted a lot previously. I'm very close to my mom and I didn't even tell her about any of these previous assaults. I feel like I have to make this distinction even though I really don't, but I have never been raped. I have been touched, held, groped, pinned, and other very traumatic things. Hannah was aware that I have been assaulted before but nothing more.
What Hannah had done was something my first boyfriend, Andrew, did to me a lot in our very short 2 months together. The first time he tried to kiss me, he grabbed my face and went in for it while we were in the car. I had to grab his face and shove him away. (Don't ask me why I still dated him, I have no idea either.) He tried to fuck me in the car on another occasion by climbing on top of me. He pinned me down onto a fallen tree in the woods and touched me and kissed me. He ...you get the point. Andrew was not the first nor last person to assault me.
What's destroying me the most is that she was the closest and basically only friend I have in this area. We all work in an office together, and I literally couldn't go to work today out of fear of seeing her (she was out yesterday). Hannah has an important interview tomorrow morning, then afterwards I'm going to tell her that I need space and our relationship needs to stay purely professional now. I can almost guarantee you she doesn't remember this occurring because she was so drunk. I asked two other people and they don't remember either.
Tldr; My coworker and close friend tried to assault me while very drunk (and I sober) at a party next to her boyfriend. Now, I have to face her about it and ask for space.

not posted here for weeks. after GB diagnosis, also diagnosed with Prostate Cancer - a new learning curve, but wanted to follow up because GB is still an issue for me, and diet is so important.
have 1.8 inch GS, & many smaller ones, but no attacks in over 5 months. Dr's recco's surgery, which I'm resisting, esp since diet has really helped.
imho, biggest problem with GB attacks (not the underlying issue, which still exists) is consuming too much fat & processed sugars. on the downside, it means no more eating out, & no more friends & family cooked food.
for first few weeks, nixed all fats - basically half apple, half banana, oats & trivial protein per day. noticed hair felt wiry, skin felt rough, constipated every day. one does need fats.
started re-cooking chicken - but had to drain all the run off fats (which I normally think of as stock) & discard it. then add water, again drain & discard. once cooked, added lots of broccoli, cauli, spinach, other veg, - which do contain a different type of fat.
can now cook & consume beef - top round, eye of round, any of the low fat cuts. again, drain & dump the juices (which is really sad - all that yummy gravy).
desserts are apple slices or banana - maybe with some apple sauce & no fat Greek yogurt.
bottom line is that 6 mo ago, I was on the verge of hitting the ER, and agreeing to anything to stop the pain. I'm now 40/50lbs lighter & almost slim again.
At this time, I'm of the opinion that I can still live with this without surgery, as long as I'm very careful.
One still has to be cautious & I can feel an impending issue if I get too cocky with fat & sugar intake, but for now it's manageable.
good luck to all.

so, i have been managing the information/coordinating care for my uBPD mom’s terminal cancer for 3 years now. i was still in the FOG when it began and stepping up and taking on all the mental load so she could focus on treatment (or, at times, focus on arguing why we were all wrong about her treatment) became, like, my whole identity for a minute there. i have since stepped back a little since gaining awareness but my dad is now dead and she can’t use him to provide her car service anymore so every 3 months my kind, supportive husband and i load up into the car and take an entire afternoon/3 hours worth of driving to go get her at her house, bring her to her oncologist (which i arranged for her at a top tier research hospital, of course) in our city and then take her home again.
today her oncologist finally hit the wall in trying to explain to her that the chemo that’s been kicking her ass but still keeping her alive all year isn’t really doing much for her anymore so it’s time to try immunotherapy, which she is VEHEMENTLY against for ??? reasons (maybe dr. oz did an episode on it, idk). oncologist was like “i find your resistance to this very interesting because basically none of my other patients react this way” LOL. her onc is sooo sweet so her affect with my mom is incredible and my mom will usually try to convince herself to do whatever her doctor wants, even if her doctor says exactly what i’ve been saying with no impact, because she adores her (aka wants her authority figure approval, i’m sure). but she just doesn’t want to try anything new at all no matter how much perspective anybody, even her doctor, tries to give her. she would rather fry herself to death with taxane because it doesn’t require exiting her new comfort zone.
anyway. it’s just very funny and also crazy making for me to watch another person attempt to reason with my mom, the REAL version of her, not the fake normal one she puts out to everyone except for me under every other circumstance. like, my dad died last year and she’s my only immediate family left and this woman could give a fuck less about any impact her impending death has on me (which she has no reason to believe wouldn’t devastate me deeply). she just wants to tell the doctor she’s so overwhelmed and it’s unfair that they won’t let her keep doing the very expensive, very difficult chemo she’s used to because she still likes it so why are they forcing her to change her treatment! like… girl??? because it’s not keeping you alive anymore???? it’s like reasoning with a baby! help!!!

Hi all, as the title states - I am looking for feedback on my pay plan. I've worked at a large new and used Subaru dealer in MA for the past 2 years. Our current pay plan is as follows:
\ 100% commission based with some bonus opportunities from the dealer and manufacturer, no hourly/base pay **

• $200 mini on new/used, or 20% front end profit after they take $1,000 pack off the top (uncapped)
  
• after you sell and deliver 15 for the month, you get an extra $30 retroactive
  
• if your survey scores from the new cars (survey sent from manufacturer) scores remain at 95% (any return below 9/10 tears your score down drastically) you get an extra $850 for the month (from my dealership)
  
• once you have 3 new cars for the month, the manufacturer pays $70 per new car, and if your survey scores are high enough you get an extra $50 per new car (total of $120)
  
• our BDC department is oddly structured as a management position here rather than an entry level position (everyone in the role was previously a sales person as well). We call it the INT department, basically internet sales. Their department works with customers over email/text/phone calls (not in person) for scheduling test drives, they also follow up on every lead from online traffic (sales people do not have access to any online leads, we can only meet a customer by answering the phone, greeting a fresh customer when they arrive to the dealership, or by referral from a previous customer). However, if BDC collects a deposit on a vehicle and then hands the deal off to a sales person (the sales person is then responsible for getting all paperwork/insurance info/trade appraisal completed, and once the vehicle is registered we then spend about 60 mins going over each and every button and feature in the car with the customer...) I expect to be with a INT handoff customer about 4-5 hours all-in-all in most circumstances - and my commission is capped on every BDC handoff to $200 - even if there was $7,000 profit after they took their $1,000 pack off the top.
  

Right now, just about every single car leaving the lot is a $200 mini... we are selling new cars below employee pricing, and I don't think I've hit 15 once so far this year - it's been very rough to say the least. We have no receptionist at our dealership, which means that us sales people are responsible for answering/redirecting all incoming phone calls, as well as taking messages for others. We are also responsible for stocking in new vehicles, snow removal, writing online car descriptions (that one is funny to me because it seems like a task more designated for the INT team, but who am I to decide that?), and so many more tasks that most other dealerships have other employees to take care of. I am feeling so much frustration because management has been promising us for more than 6 months that volume is expecting to be ramping up and it hasn't - if anything, it's been steadily slower and yet they have hired two new sales people (14 of us total now). I am only paid for the vehicle I sell and I feel the work here is not matching the compensation. Hell, even when the market was "great" I did not even clear $7,500 for a 5 week month delivering 18 cars.
I absolutely LOVE my coworkers, and I really do look up to my GSM and SM's - they have taught me so much and do so every day, however they aren't paying my bills. If things do not change NOW, I will lose everything my apartment, my car - it's not like I'm not putting in the hours and the hard work. My closing ratio is high and my surveys/reviews are excellent - the traffic is horrifically low, and its like another slap in the face blowing every deal out to a mini on top of it. I feel as though they are expecting sales people to take the hit and ride out the slow market, all while higher-ups are reaping volume bonus incentives.
I guess my question here is: what is your pay plan like? what are your thoughts on mine? can you give me any advice? thank you in advance for reading all of this, and I really do appreciate any and all feedback. wishing you all a busy and prosperous May!

When theorising in astrophysics, and more specifically the beginning and expansion of the universe (the big bang), the phenomenon of black holes and the mysteries behind dark matter and dark energy, we mistakenly use the two concepts interchangeably, they being 1. The philosophical zero, ie nothingness, and 2. The mathematics concept of zero, ie summarily attaching the philosophical concept of zero, with a numerical designation because it greatly assists the functionality of mathematic in the paradigm of our observable reality. Also please bearing mind the the math concept of zero allows negative values, unlike the philosophy, and when discussing space time, there is no place for negative numbers. Now that said and made clear, I believe it impossible for us to attempt to explain the unimaginable, without separation and distinction of the two concepts when infinity is brought into the conversation. Infinity, like zero, is a philosophical concept not all that dissimilar to zero, it has a mathematical conceptual basis also, but unlike the philosophical zero ie nothingness, it is given a numerical designation that more accurately relates to it philosophically, even though it is not strictly a number and cannot he used in any tangible calculation, mathematics certainly allows for its philosophical manifestation into mathematical equations.
I see this as a huge conflict, especially as it the very essence of big bang theory ie from nothing came infinity at the moment of the big bang. We surely cannot hope to solve this puzzle if the universe if we are conceptually flawed at he very starting point. 0 and infinity therefore cannot be used together in any calculation because we haven't yet reconciled the two conceptually. How can we look at this differently? How can we navigate passed mathematical dogma a concepts our brains are not capable of truly understanding on a practical level?
These are very tough existential and philosophical problems. So rather than just critise the current order and point out what I see as conflicts, but offer no alternative, may I suggest at least a starting point for discussion and exploration which may be found in the area of fractal science/mathematics. And a good place to focus the beginning of any theoretical discourse, in my opinion would be the work of, amoung others, Mandelbrot and the set named after him, the Mandelbrot Set. I suggest this because it mathematically the most relevant area of a field and is largely avoided by the popular culture's interest in fractals which is largely forcused on aesthetical beauty, particularly popular with the psychedelic subculture which I believe has a place and time to be investigated as a part of the whole discussion, but maybe for now should not be a point of focus in fear of contaminating a sterile discussion with with larger philosophically arguments about what is reality, due to the psychedelic substance insights of those schools. To incorporate any talk of altered states of consciousness, may be counter productive at this time. Hence my Mandelbrot suggestion achieves the mathematical parameters I believe are the best for theoretical mathematical support and cancels out the annoying noise that the fractal science field makes due to its attractiveness to non mainstream pop culture.
The Mandelbrot set is intriguing, not only because of the almost mindblowing graphical capability of AI, for as the Mandelbrot set seen by AI and then visualised for us to see, is nothing short of unbelievably beautiful. It also has an ability to provoke inner hought and discourse without one knowing the subject, topic or reason for the quiet peaceful internal discourse it inspires. I mention this, not because it can directly be incorporated in the radical discussion, but experiencing the astonishlng complexity if its beauty and the way it continues infinitely (or rather as long as it continues to be observed) because if the very self contained nature of the Mandelbrot set. After all, the mandelbrit set is simply a set of numbers, that when placed in the equation, do not spiral out into infinity. The equation value is always >0 or <2. So what as I see as irony, as the set was designed to avoid infinity in a sense, what it actually does is provide us with the best possible conceptualisation, in practice and theory, of a model demonstrating infinity. Even more bizarre is that the technology had only recently become available to show us visually by AI graphing. I'm not sure without the visual stimulus, could we have seen how beautifully fractal science demonstrates its potential unravelling existential and theoretical mysteries. I believe it lends itself perfectly to my proposed theory.
I think so because infinity is difficult for the human mind to grasp, some may say impossible. What is even more difficult for our minds to grasp is infinity of reducted values. Basically, if infinity can exist in an expanding sense, then it is not a stretch of conceptualisation to think it can infinitely get smaller. This breaks no rules of science. Searching for the building block of the universe has been crusade of quantum physicists dating back to the creation of the scientific theory. Much money and effort has been spent in search for smaller and smaller still subatomic particles. What they do is fractal science in its purest form, yet like with the study of Theoretical Astrophysics, quantum science theory is its self hampered by the concept if zero as a number, in my opinion. Even doing the work of factually reducing matter, they are blinded to its possible futility, should fractal reduction does forever decend in to fractal infinity or -ve infinity. For if that is the case, maybe quantum theory is in fact mankind's first exploration, albeit unknowingly, into what may well be a black hole. That is for a later discussion but certainly worth bringing to the attention for the purposes of this discussion.
So if we can accept that -ve infinity is as equally viable and logical as +ve infinity, what room in this discussion is left for the inclusion of zero?
I believe this leaves no room for zero in the same conversation as infinity. I am not suggesting zero should be stricken from mathematics. However I am suggesting that mathematics use of zero may, invalidate is ongoing use as an effective tool for measurement and communication, when the subject is beyond our ability to comprehend. Few people will argue that our 6 senses are significantly lacking the capacity to comprehend cosmological dynamics. Mathematics nothing more than an application of our 6 senses, to make sense of the chaos occurring all around us. Over hundreds and thousands of years, this is the best we have been able to do in terms of calculation and accurate prediction of future occurances. Even the concept of zero is less than 1000 years old. The Romans saw no use in incorporating it into their model, and to this day we wonder at their and other ancient civilisations ability for astonishing accuracy in measurement and prediction. Look at all they, the Egyptians and others managed without using zero in a single calculation. We can also break this down out of our conscious paradigm into nature. Numbers do not exist in nature (that includes the universe). It begs the question of do numbers really exist? Are numbers no more than part of our delusional reality? Who knows, but one thing is for sure, zero certainly doesn't exist anywhere outside of our consciousness. Not even in our own very bodies. How bodies clearly hold a knowledge that hasn't seemed to be passed over to our conscious, aware selves. Even on the smallest scale, without any intervention or guidance from any sort of intelligence, within our cellular membranes. Complex calculations are constantly being carried out. Consider cellular replication for example. In order for a cell to divide successfully, there must be a correct allocation of resources, let's just say primarily energy distribution for the sake of brevity. To split a cell but calculate the energy necessary to simply cary put the force of splitting. It must also calculate how much energy needs to be transfered to the new cell. This calculation must include how much energy for it take to replicate all cellular matter, how much energy is required for both cells to recover from the trauma, and how much energy on top of that, the new cell will require to become mature and begin its own replication. There are multiple complex calculations to be made there, and they then must be combined in to an overall and more complicated calculation again. All of this is done without intelligence and without using numbers ie mathematics. This same process can be observed all the way back to the very first beginning of not just life, but biochemistry in general. So I hope this demonstrates that the universe doesn't exist numerically. There are no rules in the universe. We created rules for our sciences, because if we didn't follow them the sciences would fail at unacceptable percentage of predictions.
So we make rules to overcome the shortcomings while waiting for future technologies or fixes. Mathematics and sciences are little more than a carefully ordered tapestry of rules, with too many exeptions for too many rules. We create rules and ideas to assist the conteived & malfunctioning intangible thing to not have to go to all the trouble of finding something that works better. We are just littered with examples through every field. Like 'zero', or Pi, or "bimdas" (brackets, indicies, multiply, division, addition and subtraction. I find this a good example, for not following this exact order of calculations, a correct answer to equation will nev a result) and thousands of others.
No rules exist in nature, it appears to be that it just is, always will be and always has been.
So in summary, given our restrictions on trying to understand the universe, namely intelligence, our 6 limited senses, our arrogance and our mortality, should we narrow the pursuits our restrictions can make us comfortable with? Thisbwilk lead us nowhere. By abandoning zero as the only accepted scientific approach to the universe, and allowing science to have multiple validating throeries for what is the same problem. The scientific community abhors divergence from dogma and academics are held to ransom with funding or being published, if their ideas are not with acceptable parameters.
But for the sake of this conversation, can we discuss the merits of looking at the big bang without reference to nothing ie zero, but instead +ve and -ve infinity."

I have inherited a Linux environment that had, until recently, mostly been managed by the devs using the systems. The company has since grown, as has the use-case for Unix based servers, so after expressing interest in the role I was promoted from Desktop Support to System Admin/Unix Admin to address the need a little less than a year ago. I have been trying to address some of the configuration sprawl and security issues as I learn, however, my current problem would really benefit from a second opinion from more experienced admins in this space.
Currently, I have several Ubuntu servers that are used by multiple users, with NFS shares mounted from NetApp NAS. The NetApp serves the same files/folders using both NFS and CIFS, with an NTFS security style, so all permissions are managed via NTFS ACLs, even when using NFS. To facilitate this, we currently have UNIX names manually mapped to Windows users in the NetApp config, so that Unix users can access files with NTFS ACLs. Additionally, these Linux servers are all domain joined, and users log in using their windows credentials.
Recently, we discovered that the root account is mapped to a privileged Windows user via the NetApp that we do not want it mapped to. The main issue is that our dev team members use Docker, and the containers access the NFS shares as root, so removing that mapping will break stuff in production. Subsequently, this highlighted another issue in our config; Docker users can volume bind local directories to the containers and effectively elevate to root without having been explicitly granted sudo permissions.
My current plan to address these issues is as follows:
• First, I plan on remapping container root a different id (ie. UID 300000) via userns remapping/subuid configs. This way Docker container root is no longer root in the host filesystem, and the remapped user’s access to the shares can be managed separately.
• Then I am going to create two shares, one for the users to access the data from the servers and one for applications to access data. Both will be CIFS shares (so no more NFS); the user share using the multiuser and sec=krb5 options and the application share mounted using a credential file with service account credentials, and then locked down with UNIX permission bits so that only the container user specified in the userns remap process has read/write access to the share.
Does this sound like an efficient solution to this problem? Is there a better way to approach this or other suggestions/considerations?
I had been pursuing using Kerberized NFS or a single CIFS share for both users and the application, but I ran into a few roadblocks. The biggest issue was that I could not figure out how to grant the containers on a given system a Kerberos ticket to access a Kerberized share (which is why I settled on a separate mount for applications using service account credentials). I was able to get as far as remapping the container root to a user (UID 300000) then grabbing Kerberos tickets on system boot for 300000 that is from a Windows service account with relevant access configured in the NTFS ACLs. When I tried to access Kerberized NFS shares as 300000 from the host it worked fine, but when I tried to run a container with that mount volume bound, I was denied access. My specific test case was that I ran an nginx container and shelled in as container root and tried to list/view/modify files from the Kerberized share. I confirmed on the host that root processes in the container were being mapped to 300000 on the host using Docker Top.

[Chapter 1] ; [Previous Chapter] ; [Discord + Wiki] ; [Patreon]
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Chapter 168 – The moment to live and the moment to die
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„Jumping!“ an Ensign announced loudly as the Sun's view-windows very briefly flickered into a dark black only to go back to a full view of the ongoing battle basically instantly, having barely shifted the ship's position at incomprehensible speed. „Shot clear of allied ships.“
Vice-Admiral Kazadi tapped his finger on one of the armrests of the Commander's seat that still felt anything but comfortable for him to sit in as the tight grid of flashing lights reflected in his eyes within the twilight of the bridge.
“Fire,” he then ordered. Not even a blink later, a burst of colorful light broke into his view from the side of his very own ship, lighting up the entirety of the bridge even through the automatically tinting windows that absorbed a lot of the harmful light so the crew wouldn't flashbang themselves with each shot.
The relativity canon fire tore through the enemy ship at an almost literal instant with any travel time barely being conceivable to a mortal mind. In a large unload of energy that left almost the entire stern-side of the zodiatos ship as a molten mass of dispersing slag, the main propulsion was taken out. Simultaneously, the two accompanying cruisers had also taken their shots; with the 'Civil' taking out the engine of one more enemy vessel while the 'of the roses' had instead used its shot to disperse one of the enemy projectiles in order to buy their own hunter ships more freedom of movement. Those huge ones didn't go down easy from one of the hunters' smaller shots, so using one of the large canons to dispatch it took some of the heat off them.
Meanwhile, smaller targets on the enemy vessels, such as their own canons, were gradually taken out by said hunters, whose own fire – while able to be quite destructive if intended no doubt – could be used in a far more precise manner. With more and more of their canons failing, the protective volleys the coreworld terrorists could fire to hide themselves away also became less and less effective.
“Send the fallback-beacon,” Kazadi then ordered, since close quarter attacks became less and less necessary.
It seemed that the zodiatos had a hard time adjusting to the combat style of the human unkindnesses, however that didn't mean they should take any unnecessary risks. Even if a pilot could've been able to avoid all enemy attacks in a perfect world, he knew that his pilots were only human.
Casualties of their own had been comparatively minimal so far, however as if to prove him right about his thoughts, he could see on his surveillance screen how, just in that moment, one of their ships was taken out by an enemy craft.
He grimaced to himself and let out a mild sigh. One more family who would never see one of their own again...
It took a moment before all the ships were reached by the beacon. Due to the nature of their own combat strategies, as well as the particular nature of hyperspace, it was entirely impossible to effectively contact any of their ships directly while they were out in the battle. Therefore, the order to fall back had to be broadcast as a general signal, that each of the pilots could individually pick up as soon as they would keep still for long enough so that it could reach them.
By now, the battle was already won. None of the zodiatos' weapons were able to match the relativity canons in effective range and without the larger ships to back them up, their small hunters wouldn't be able to launch an offensive – shields or not. They could just stay back and fire until surrender now. As the signal was picked up, one of their ships after another disappeared in one last flash of hyperspace as they joined back up with the larger vessels in an enclosing formation.
“Prepare for the retrieval of some of those projectiles,” the Vice-Admiral then ordered as he hoped they would be able to track some of those spent shots their enemies had fired. They would have to figure out what kind of tech that was.
In such a small-scale conflict, it was more than manageable to face it. However, it could offer some difficulties in larger fleets – especially since they didn't know how far this kind of tech could possible be expanded and refined. It was quite possible this was just some form of prototype.
While that order was followed, one of his Lieutenants suddenly spoke up.
“Sir, we have an incoming transmission from the planet. Civilian. Not encrypted, but they seemingly had an access code,” they related quickly.
“Is the earlier interference cleared up?” he immediately asked back, to which the answer was positive. “Put it through then,” he immediately ordered as soon as he heard that.
He rubbed one of his tight braids between his fingers as he waited for contact to be established. Once the line was clear, things remained quiet for a moment.
“What are we best at?” he then asked the silent line, his chest tightening ever so slightly, even if he didn't have to wait long for a reply.
“Topping from the bottom,” a very familiar voice replied from the other end, sounding incredibly strained but most certainly alive.
The code phrase was an old in-joke about something that had been said back during humanity's first contact with the tonamstrosites due to a slightly choppy translation. However, it more than sufficed here to tell Kazadi that the person on the other side of the line was not only genuine, but also not in any immediate distress – at least none that was brought onto her by someone else.
“Good to hear your voice Ma'am,” he greeted the Admiral after taking a brief moment to allow his heart to settle.
“The pleasure is all mine, Celestin,” Admiral Krieger replied in between heavy breaths that sounded like a combination between being ready to collapse and absolutely willing to tear anyone's throat out at a moment's notice. “Excuse me for the unorthodox contact, my own means of communication have all been destroyed. Update me.”
A brief smile played on the Vice-Admiral's lips.
“No problem, Ma'am. Things are under control up here, but multiple allied coluyvoree ships were destroyed and we suffered some casualties of our own which I will take full responsibility for,” he quickly complied. “By now, the enemy crafts have been largely disabled and our fighters are falling back. What's the situation on your end?”
There was a bit of a grunt from the other side of the line that seemed unrelated to the ongoing conversation.
“I'm sure you did everything by the books,” Krieger then replied a moment later. “Down here the situation is precarious but momentarily under control. We have an unconfirmed number of casualties after an attack with an unknown weapon. All squads are either KIA or unresponsive. We took down six enemy combatants but can't confirm if there's more. I'm going to need clean up, rescue teams, as well as pickup for me and two large offworlders asap.”
Celestin nodded.
“We're in a stable position, so we'll jump teams down right away. Hold out just a minute more,” he assured her while already signing in the necessary order to the troops they had on standby. “How bad are your injuries?”
There was another groan of pain from Krieger's side.
“Crushed cranberries,” she replied after a long moment that sounded like she needed to catch her breath.
“Copy that,” Kazadi replied with a grimace. “Sending muti-team with the evac.”
“Copy that,” Krieger confirmed. “Krieger out.”
With that, the call was hung up. On his screen, Celestin could see how the preparations for dispatch of the requested teams was already well underway. Jumping towards a planet at FTL was generally discouraged by the Galactic Community. However, this was an emergency. They couldn't wait for normal re-entry.
After watching the reported progress for just a moment, his eyes returned to the ongoing battle. He watched the enemy ships as they hovered dead in space, unable to maneuver.
They seemed to have recalled their own fighters back in order to form some sort of protective wall around the 'mother ships' with their own small shields. Obviously it wouldn't be very effective, so it seemed like needless cruelty to make their own soldiers get in the way of the incoming fire. Something within Kazadi told the Vice-Admiral they weren't going to stand down.
“Sir, we're getting some strange hyperspace-readings,” his Lieutenant suddenly announced, making him look up.
“Weapon-grade?” he immediately asked, knowing they had less than a moment to react if it was. However, he also figured there would've been more urgency to their voice had it been so.
“No, Sir. Travel-grade,” the Lieutenant quickly replied. “However the readings are unusual. It seems like they are creating a stretch solely around themselves.”
Kazadi's lips shifted a bit as he took that in and he briefly ran a hand over his mouth in thought. “Prepare to collapse,” he ordered. “Maybe they will attempt some sort of running start. We can't let them get away.”
Right then, the light of what was happening had not yet caught up to the spacial distortion that their sensors were detecting, meaning the ships still looked perfectly normal – if damaged – when he looked at them. However, they were planning something. And that made them appear all the more ominous.
His mind quickly went through their own protocols. The U.H.S.D.F. employed hyperspace in nearly all its possible facets in their tactics. If it was even close to sensible, they would have something that was akin to the maneuver their foes were attempting to execute right now.
A bubble of hyperspace solely around their ships...a dodge? Hardly, there was nothing to dodge like that. An attempt to hide away? No, they knew human ships could collapse hyperspace from the outside easily.
Before him, the windows of the ship once again automatically dimmed, protecting the crew's eyes as the colorful light of the created hyperspace-bubble finally reached them.
“Hyperspace collapsed!” the Lieutenant then suddenly announced, causing Kazadi to blink in surprise as his eyes shot up to his screen. He hadn't given any order to collapse it yet. But indeed, it was gone. For a moment, he thought that the stress had caused his officer to use the wrong term in haste, however no, they had been completely right. It had not been dispersed in a controlled manner. It had collapsed.
In a mild 'thud', the Vice-Admiral's fist descended on the armrest, hand firmly clenched into a fist.
“Those cowardly ba-” he began to growl but then bit his tongue and released a low, almost grunting exhale while his fist quivered from momentarily clenching tighter. “Prepare to search for survivors,” he instead said in a much more controlled manner a moment later. “Preserve lives.”
“Yessir,” multiple of his officers echoed back as he looked out of the window, where he could still see the ghostly afterimage of the hyperspace bubble linger for a bit longer. It was always a strange feeling, seeing someone in the distance who was already dead...
–
With her view darkened and her goggles momentarily pulled off her eyes, Shida stared at the glowing bubble of impossible colors. Her sensors had already told her what was about to happen at any moment now, however her eyes still heavily constricted as they finally witnessed what unfolded themselves.
In what could be described as nothing else than a 'snap' , the light of the hyperspace-stretch instantly condensed down into its original size as the universe all at once remembered that the laws of physics were a thing that existed and brutally forced space to conform to them once again – no matter what may have been in between it and its original form.
Anything within the strange, round stretch was mercilessly ripped along with the convulsion, forcing all the injected warships and fighters into the single, small point that the stretch had been generated from. Though not even a faction of a second later, it all exploded outwards again as the megatons of mass realized that they could not all exist in the same place at once, since the energy of the event was not quite potent enough to press it all into a neutron star or singularity.
No longer recognizable blotches of undefined, white-hot matter were instantly scattered in all directions like some sort of micro-supernova that accentuated the sometimes still burning nano-stars that the earlier battle had created from the opposing fighters.
It was almost pretty...but still, Shida couldn't help but let her ears hang as she wondered how many of the enemy combatants had known about the decision to end things this way. Had any of them even been asked?
Even if it was the far more disturbing answer in a way, Shida almost hoped that this had actually been one mutual suicide-pact instead of the decision of one single commander to choose death over dishonor. Especially while sitting in a ship that was technically under the command of someone else herself, that was certainly the less immediately petrifying option – even if it would probably spell far worse things in the long run.
As she said there, the 'shockwave' of the collapsing hyperspace suddenly hit her, spreading out through space even without any medium to carry it and rocking her ship gently while also penetrating all throughout her body. Of course the earlier relativity fire had already caused similar ripples and she was therefore quite used to the feeling, however these ones sure felt a bit more severe than those of the U.H.S.D.F.'s own canons. It was like she felt her own body distort while also remaining perfectly in palace – almost like she was a stiff container full of water that someone had given a heavy smack from the side, riling up the liquid without it actually having any place to plash to.
According to everything they knew, this phenomenon felt incredibly odd but was entirely harmless to living beings – which was instinctively very hard to believe when one felt it on their own body.
However, her dwelling thoughts were, perhaps luckily, interrupted as she – or more precisely one of her scanners - picked up on a peculiar signature that one of the scattered debris pieces was sending out.
Well, it was 'peculiar' to her that there was a signal at all at first, however then she quickly realized what it actually was. This particular signal was hammered into any pilot's head six ways to Sunday, and so she reacted relatively quickly when she glanced at the grid and realized that she was the closest ship to it. Firing up her engines, she turned her ship on the spot in a slight drift before activating her generator and making a jump right behind the flying object.
Once there, she allowed her computer to take aim for a second before firing out a harpoon that quickly struck the flying debris and latched her ship onto it through a long cable, allowing her to pull the thing along with her after slowly using her backwards thrusters to disperse its speed little by little. Pressing the indicator of her communication, she then spoke up.
“Scratches to Sun,” she announced. “I just recovered a black box. Permission to return for inspection?”
The black boxes of modern ships truly were among the most ridiculous pieces of tech out there, in Shida's humble opinion. Built to withstand almost everything that would likely take a ship out through a combination of brilliant engineering and extremely flexible material that only worked in its indented manner on very small scales. Well, very small compared to the ships they were built into. The things were about half the size of Shida in the end. For many years, armies of scientists had attempted their very best to make this same sort of defense useful in ways that could maybe be used to protect actual people from catastrophic events – but to no avail so far. For now, the only thing those little marvels could allow to survive even something as ludicrous as hyperspace collapsing was information.
“Permission granted, Lieutenant-Commander,” the answer came almost immediately. “Return to hangar three.”
“Copy,” Shida replied. “Scratches out.”
With that, she moved her ship around and prepared for her jump back to the Sun. Hopefully this thing would give them some answers on what exactly this whole thing was meant to accomplish...
–
Far away in another part of the galaxy, a pair of mildly glowing red eyes was laser-focused on a large screen that was just one of many that had merged all over Nedstaniot-Station to broadcast the breaking news to anyone willing to lift their eyes at a slight angle to look at them.
An attack on a coreworld. And not just any coreworld. Gewelitten itself. Something like this hadn't happened in...well, Curi didn't even know how long.
Details seemed to still be incredibly fuzzy as the battle so close to the coluyvoree homeworld had either just happened or was still happening at the moment of the broadcast, however what few details were known were already repeated on end in an endless scroll of text that was meant to catch as many people up to speed as was at all possible through the medium of television. Obviously the same emerging details could already be looked up on the net as well to find them in a more digestible format than the endlessly moving text next to the not exactly top quality footage of the occurring conflict.
However, despite the speed with which it went by, Curi had no problem following the scroll as they stared at the screen intensely.
“Attack was unannounced. Multiple Gewelitten fleet ships destroyed. Official sources confirm: Humanity NOT the aggressor. Attacking ships presumed to be of zodiatos origin. Unknown weapon technology deployed during the attack. U.H.S.D.F. ships engaged in combat after aggression. Myiat delegation ship confirmed unharmed. Attack on government facility on planet simultaneous to spacial attack. Councilman-Candidate Aldwin confirmed unharmed. Status of U.H.S.D.F. General Krieger unknown. Status of Gewelitten Governor H. Cierrophai unknown. Status of Acting-Councilman Afuéhner unknown. Allied coreworld defense fleets activated and inbound. General alert level raised to 8. Hyperspace-travel shut down around the system.”
“Mother, oh no...” Mueen said with absolute shock in his eyes, both of his hands clasped over this mouth as his wide pupils quivered in fear from what they witnessed.
Curi could understand his worry. Though Moar had supposedly been with James, so she would probably be fine. The cyborg was certainly more than just a little relieved that James was already confirmed to be safe. Though the idea that Admiral Krieger's situation was unknown was more than just a little disconcerting.
Though despite the supposed lack of their commanding officer, it seemed like the humans had decisively won out in the battle outside of the coreworld's atmosphere; unknown technology or not.
Given the sub-par footage that some drone was likely recording from quite far away from the actual conflict, it was very hard to tell just what sort of weapon the unknown but presumed to be zodiatos attackers had unleashed there. It looked like some sort of emanating energy that destroyed what it came into contact with but also interacted with it as if it had a physical presence.
Curi had never seen anything remotely like it before – not even in their wildest theories – and their mind immediately wanted to go wild with speculations and ideas about how such a thing might work now that they knew for a fact that it was possible from seeing it with their own eyes.
However, the cyborg pulled themselves together and successfully forced the briefly almost overwhelming desire to focus on nothing else down as they shifted their gaze slightly away from the screen to look over at their other currently nearby company.
Then again, as much as they knew they couldn't let their guard down around him, Reprig's eyes were just as immovably attached to the large screen as Mueen's were as he witnessed the unfolding battle with quivering horror.
His trunk was wiggling wildly in his face and one of his hands nervously scratched over the plate of the table they were all sitting and standing at and on, right next to a piece of paper with a hastily drawn sketch of a spring-like mechanical leg that was inspired by what humans called 'running blades'. The Warrant Officer's weapon also laid on the table, pushed a but further away from his hand so he wouldn't be able to easily reach it.
Though despite his focus, Curi couldn't quite help but speak up after a moment of watching him. “A coreworld attacking another coreworld,” they said to the man, who they knew either had to know far more than they did about this – or would be far more invested in it unfolding. “This is unprecedented.”
Reprig seemed to notice that they were talking to him, however he still remained silent and stared a good few moments longer before finally pulling his gaze away from the screen.
As his eyes met theirs, he looked a bit sick. It almost reminded the cyborg of one of the first interactions they had with the man, back when they nudged him slightly to hand his spy-device back to him after he tried to hide it in James' cabin. Though this time, the cyborg was quite sure that they were not the reason why the man seemed like most of his blood was currently rushing into his stomach.
Could he actually be shocked about what was happening? Was this not part of the plan?
“Unprecedented doesn't even come close to describing it...” he mumbled and couldn't hold the cyborg's gaze for long, looking down to the table's plate instead. “And these aren't just any coreworlds. Osontjar and Gewelitten have been allied for an unimaginably long time. The thought that they would even think of attacking each other...what sort of madness could've caused something like this?”
Curi was the first to admit to themselves that they were far from the best at reading people. If someone with even a modicum of skill in acting wanted to make them believe something untrue about the person they were talking to, they would never deny that there was a good chance of that person succeeding.
Still, Reprig's reaction felt...genuine to them. As if he had actually never expected something like this to happen. Not in a million years.
Maybe it was just skillful acting. And Curi knew that they should have been suspicious like that. However, despite everything he had done, they couldn't quite bring themselves to suspect that he was lying at that moment.
“I know it is unlikely you will give me an honest answer, but-” Curi began to say, however Reprig was more than able to anticipate what they were going to ask and replied long before they were finished.
“No. No. Never,” the sipusserleng said, shaking his head heavily and standing his trunk up while making a denying gesture with his hand that was so brash that he actually knocked his crutch off the small outcrop in the table it had been laid down on. “This must be some absolutely deranged people, no two ways about it. To attack a coreword...”
Curi noticed Reprig's gaze briefly twitching down, his eyes jumping onto the personal assistant strapped to his lower arm as if he suddenly got the urge to use it for something.
Curi suspected he likely wanted to call someone; question them to make extra sure that they had, in fact, nothing to do with this. Though the sipusserleng suppressed the urge and pulled his eyes away, bringing them back up to the screen.
Just at that moment, the implosion of collapsing hyperspace suddenly lit up the footage moments before the glowing remnants of what once had been the zodiatos ships were scattered across the star-system.
Mueen mumbled something in his home's language as his eyes remained affixed to the screen. Curi couldn't even begin to guess what he was saying. However, his voice sounded pleading.
“Suicide instead of surrender?” Reprig meanwhile mouthed breathlessly as his nervous tick of excessively licking his trunk began to show.
Although he had often been otherwise employed in recent times, Curi could see it in the man's eyes that he was still, in a way, military at heart. He knew the general values and doctrines that were conveyed to the soldiers of the Communal Military, both inside and out. And the idea of someone choosing death like this...it seemed to rock him to his very core.
Slowly, he turned his gaze over to Curi. His eyes were almost pleading with the cyborg, even if they seemed to already know that his next question would be asked in vain.
“Could it maybe have been the humans and their-” he began, but this time, it was Curi's term to cut him off after anticipating what was coming.
“While humans very much employ the collapsing of hyperspace as a tactic in war, the process is not invisible – or even subtle. Had the human ships caused that collapse, it would've been noticeable,” they explained succinctly. “It could've still been a mere unexpected failure of the hyperspace generation, of course. However, with the rarity of such events, the timing seems...unlikely.”
“They weren't even trying to generate a real stretch...” Reprig concurred dejectedly and left his head hanging, his trunk also sinking down limply. “I can't even imagine- Well...I hope they will at least find peace now, away from the madness.”
Curi paused for a long moment, staring at the Warrant Officer some more. Admittedly, the cyborg was a bit confounded at something. They knew for a fact the man had put his own life on the line for his orders, with a very real chance that they would lead to his death, more than just once. And yet the idea of being ordered to die seemed to disturb him. They couldn't quite figure out the difference that led to the results in reaction being so incredibly different, however it was still very clear that there was one.
And it seemed to hit the man hard.
Self-admittedly, Curi didn't exactly pity the man. They didn't quite have the capacity to. They knew about so many horrible things he had done that simply seeing him distressed was far from enough to stir such deep empathy for him within them.
Yet still, they weren't left entirely cold by it either – and if it was only because he seemed to be affected by these events in the ways a, for a lack of a better term, 'normal person' would be. He was shocked at the sudden, seemingly senseless violence, and concerned about the people involved.
Granted, it was likely only because they were people he considered worth being concerned about, yet still, the reaction was so...'normal', in a way they didn't quite expect from someone with such a capability for unceremonious acts of cruelty and violence. Even this person who had tried to kill them, or at least had been entirely comfortable with them getting killed, was capable of such a reaction.
And Curi...wasn't sure if that made things better or worse, if they were being honest.
It felt better because there was the capability for empathy there, however...it felt worse because they felt how they had been and likely still were willingly denied said empathy.
He could have cared...he just didn't want to.
Curi shook their body heavily, causing mild sounds from the engines running their legs' movements from the sudden force as they tried to shoo away emotions that they really didn't want to be feeling at that exact moment.
The thing that mostly kept them from following up on some of their uncomfortably aggressive thoughts at that moment was the fact that Mueen was still with them, the worry for his mother written across his features like a deep engraving in a metal plaque. He did not need anything like that around him right now, that much was clear.
Slowly, they moved over to him and reached up one of their long legs to run it along his arm while he still covered parts of his large face with both hands.
“She will be alright,” Curi then assured the dark-furred rafulite, switching from their usual voice box to their more “melodic” one to put on a gentle, calming tone. “She is stronger than she seems.”
Inhaling deeply as his nostrils flared, Mueen closed his dark eyes and swallowed heavily, taking his gaze off the large screen for the first time in many minutes while slowly hanging his head down.
“Yeah,” he said, seeming to force hopefulness into his tone. “Yes, she'll be fine. She made it his far. This won't get to her.”
Curi nodded with their entire body and continued to run the tip of their leg along his arm.
“She will be,” they repeated, both to the man and themselves as their own eyes moved upwards, their gaze falling back on the battlefield riddled with burning remnants of matter. “I'm sure of it.”
–
Never in his life had James felt so drunk and so sober at the same time. His mind was entirely clear, running a light-year a minute as it desperately tried to simultaneously process all the admittedly little information that he had in his current situation AND to not absolutely freak out while doing so somehow – a task he was ludicrously failing at. And it did NOT help that his body could barely keep itself on his own two feet.
He had avoided completely fainting by a hair earlier after reminding himself that, instead of being terrified for Shida's life, it would be much more fair towards her to simply focus on trusting in her skills to carry her through. However, that was barely a little patch on an enormous crack in his facade as he couldn't help but go over and over and over the fact of how much worse the situation that she needed to jump into here had been for her simply because it was his damn birthday and they wanted to indulge over it. He should've stopped that, but noooo, he just had to go and let himself be swayed so damn easily, as if he was still that little boy following Koko around whenever she visited the compound to try and get some attention.
Of course, a quiet voice in the back of his head tried to politely remind him that Shida had, in fact, not only taken part in the festivities as well but also encouraged him to do so, however it was easily overpowered by the screaming rest of his mind.
He briefly glanced over at the only somewhat conscious Commander. When she said that they should match each other's drinks, that should've been the moment he stopped. She was like half his weight, what the hell was he thinking?
His mechanical hand shot up, heavily gripping a fist full of hair as he tried to force himself to focus. What's done is done. There's no changing it. He should focus on anything else right now.
Though as he painfully pulled on his hair like that, his eyes suddenly went wide as he noticed something. Or, more precisely, didn't notice something.
When had the alarm stopped? Just now? Or had it been out and he just hadn't noticed?
Letting go of his hair, he lifted his face and looked around. If the alarm was over, then that meant...
The uncoordinated movement of soldiers reaching for their phones and radios with different speeds went through the room, and after brief confirmation, the uniformed forces began to move, having seemingly gotten new orders other than guarding the safe-rooms. Apparently, the threat was over.
James quickly fumbled for his own phone, his barely coordinated hands struggling extremely with the simple task of trying to call one of his contacts – much to the frustration of his already cleared mind. His finger trembled as he swiped it across the screen, trying to get it to the right damn place to make a simple god-damn call.
However, he froze in the motion at a quiet sound that was immediately followed by a sudden stir behind him as multiple people seemed to move quickly. And after just a second, James was among them as well.
Nearly tripping over his feet, he damn near threw himself onto the sickbed that didn't stand too far away from him, his phone momentarily forgotten and eyes wide open as they stared over at an endlessly familiar dark face, that however had life in it for the first time in what felt like an eternity at that moment.
Slowly and twitchy, Nia's eyes fluttered open as she let out quiet groans while mildly stirring in place while her doctors and nurses hurried around her and quickly began to take her vitals.
After flinching heavily as a flashlight was quite suddenly shone into her eyes to test her photopupillary reflex, she began to move even more. Meanwhile, James and Tuya were basically pressed shoulder to shoulder close to the foot of her bed, the only thing keeping them from dashing right up to her face being just enough awareness to not get in the doctor's way.
Still, although her movements were very slow, stiff, and groggy, Nia eventually lifted up her head, looking around with still somewhat hazy and half-closed eyes. But that didn't stop her from smiling when her gaze fell onto the two who so nervously stood at her bedside there.
“Hey,” she said in a quiet, croaky, but still very much cheerful voice as her unkempt hair fell down both sides of her face.
Though James didn't see much more than that, because just about at that moment, his vision was entirely taking away by welling-up waters sweeping him along.

Hello! Within the next year, I will be living in my car full time and in the mean time I have been looking into some ways to make the time less stressful. Here are some things I have tried out in my local area and their prices!
1.) The deli in Walmart is fairly inexpensive if you know what to get, looking for a hot meal? Ask a small container of mac n cheese, this will cost you $0.97 but turns into $1.05 after tax (in California).
2.) Local Mexican bakeries have some of the best prices for bakery items like conchas! I’ve gotten a bag of like 3 conchas for around $2.00!
3.) Planet Fitness is cheap way to shower! Most of them are open 24hrs a day some days of the week. Very clean usually and you can even kill some time by working out. This can either be $10 or $25 a month.
4.) Goodwill, everyone know about this place but you can go on days where things are cheaper! (Keep in mind this is for California where I live, check in your area for their specific discounts) • Students receive 15% off their purchase, any day of the week with valid ID. • Adults 55 and older also receive 15% off their purchase each Tuesday when a valid ID is presented at the register. • Active and retired military personnel and their dependents enjoy an additional 15% off purchases each Monday when valid military ID is presented at the register.
5.) Looking for a warm breakfast without making a dent in the bank? Taco Bell by far is the cheapest option for a healthy meal, be there before 11am and you can have access to a meal under $2.00. My favorite is the “Cheesy Toasted Breakfast Burrito with Potato,” which runs you $1.69 before tax!

Timestamp
Please read the post!!
Mostly unbuilt brand new keyboards. Price includes shipping within CONUS. For international buyers, please ask with your location for exact shipping price quote. Please leave a comment before PMing and no chat. Keyboards in the timestamp but not listed in the post are sold.
Keyboards (NOT splitting kits, no trade, all sell only; I am trying to reduce my collection size not maintain!)
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Item	Description	Price
RAMA U80-A SEQ2 Moon Stealth (pics)	Brand new unbuilt. 2 hotswap PCBs, 1 alu plate, 1 PC plate, 1 W02-A Internal Dampener	$700 shipped
LZ Phase ergonomic 65% (pics)	Lifezone Phase silver A-stock. Used sporadically with mill-maxed (7305) PCB & carbon fiber plate. Comes with 3 PCBs (1 mill-max 7305, 2 brand new), 4 plates (carbon fiber (used), red alu, fr4, pc (3 are never used)), 2 inner plates offered during GB, black wrist rest (never used). With LZ branded carrying case. Not splitting extras. Please refer to additional pics for detailed pics of the extras and minor conditional concerns you may have.	$550 shipped
Mako TKL (pics)	Mako TKL in blue top silver bottom brass weight. Used sporadically. Comes with 2 PC plates (1 used, 1 brand new). Tried capturing one minor scratch on front side, please refer to additional pics. Have a personally cut poron foam and a different material foam from GB. 1 brand new unused h87C PCB with 1 Monokei Titan Grey Kaban medium case included.	$280 shipped
KCK KY-01 75% (pics)	Aquamarine (pantone 5463 C) colorway. Very good condition except for one small nick on the right side (please refer to pic, hardly noticeable). Two screw holes in the case were not machined properly and have to use shorter screws (please refer to pic). 1 mill-max (7305) PCB (full backspace, 6.25u, ANSI, used and built with cherry clip-ins on spacebar (for o-ring mounting) and durock v1 stabs elsewhere), 1 extra brand new PCB, 1 brass plate (new), 1 FR4 plate (custom cut, used) dampening foams (3 poron case foams of different thickness, 1 pcb foam) keycaps are not included in the sale, these are just for reference of the layout.	$130 shipped
Geon F2-84 (pics)	Brand new unbuilt Geonworks F2-84 in Black with Sandblasted Brass weight. Includes 1 Alu plate and 1 Hiney H87nu solder FR4 PCB.	$500 shipped
Cablecardesigns Angel 65% (pics)	Brand new unbuilt Cable car designs 65% Angel in silver WK. Includes 2 PCBs, 1 full Polypropylene plate, 1 half Polypropylene plate, 1 full POM plate. Ships in carrying bag. Missing feet (can't find anywhere)	$230 shipped
Bisoromi RS60 60% (pics)	Brand new unbuilt Red WKL. Includes 2 PCBs, 1 alu plate, 1 PC plate, 1 TX stab. Ships in carrying bag.	$390 shipped
Eniigma Vertigo 65% (pics)	Brand new unbuilt grey top white bottom. Includes 2 working PCBs, 1 broken PCB (refer to pic), 1 alu full plate, 1 alu half plate, 1 PC full plate.	$370 shipped

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Thanks for reading!

I don’t mean silverfish appearing inside my cats’ water bowl or in a bathtub, where the room is probably more humid than the rest of the house.
For ex: i have a large Tupperware container I that I use as a bathtub for my bearded dragon.
After I’ve used it and once it’s cleaned, I let it air dry on my counter.
Once it’s dry, I put it on top of the microwave. Sometimes there may be a few drops of water still but not a lot but since it’ll continue air drying on top of the microwave, Ill put it there so it’s out of the way. I check to see if there is a silverfish in there before putting it away.
When I take it out to use next time, I’ll see a silverfish in there.
Bonus question: can silverfish swim ? When I find them in my cats’ water dish it looks like they just drowned themselves. If they can’t swim, why do they submerge themselves lol

I have idea for camp and i want to check the parts im missing.
Depending on if ill manage to build it in way i want, but im looking forward to making some swamp related camp and im planning to try to build one under the bridge to make something looking like outpost, or if i will find a really good place, something like a hanging out house using one of the columns of the bridge as foundation for whole structure.
What would you recommend to fit this idea? Im looking for Free States Bundle just because it have fitting design for my theme, like defensive structures, so you can use it as example of what im looking for.
Stuff im currently having:
Vault Catwalk bundle (bought this one for building shenanigans)
Vines Bundle(just because again building shenanigans+ i really like how they looks, do planning to use one to make camp a bit more themed towards swamp one)
Polished Enclave Turrets set - I don't really like default turrets, these is much cooler+ as far as i got, more effective. Definitely will use couple just for cool look.
Succulent set - kinda fits theme + i like cacti + it was really cheap.
Overgrown vehicle - very fitting theme+ I definitely will find it a place in camp.
Fanatics Barricade - very cool looking + kinda fits my idea.
Also i have almost all stuff from Aliens and Mothman Equinox events, if its matters.
I also have majority of free plans,as well as Super Reactor and Solar Panels(Will use one or another obviously, in case of Super Reactor i think i just make it a centerpiece and build stuff around it because despite being massive, it should look awesome as part of building. Solar panels is just very convenient silent source of electricity+ they look quite good when grouped together)
Also i have every non FoF item from current seasons till 11 page, currently sitting at rank 80, planning to get all stuff from bonus page, especially cabin set.
Among those I have Grass Roof is probably worth a try.
So what do you recommend to look at? Im planning to use Steel set mainly just because it looks more fitting for outpost theme. I don't mind to make it look partially junky like intentionally adding wooden/brick stuff to Steel building to imitate quick repairs.
So what do you recommend to look at?
Additional question, is there a set/stuff that adds a different kinds of half or quarter floors except default ones?
Reason why im asking its Utility Room shelter that im planning to turn into mini bunker that will be a part of outpost. Since the narrow room fits only 1,5 big foundations in narrow spaces i can't use floors from Catwalk bundle without mixing it with wooden floor and ceiling(metal one is transparent and i cant put wallpaper on Floor cells to make them more metal-looking, so i also look at ways to improve this because i often use those). Its can be decorated of course, but im curious if something like that exists.
Another thing id like to ask. Is it possible to make independent second floor to be able to rotate it and get a bit more interesting construction than regular 2 floor building? Something like imitation of ship containers stacked one on top of another as crudely as possible or something similar.
P.S. Sorry for a lot of questions, just curious because i know what i want to build, but just looking for fitting stuff to get from Atomic Shop or probably elsewhere.
P.P.S I really wanted to buy FoF for month for freebies but for whatever reason i can't buy it via Windows Store for Ukraine.

Hey all Does anyone know of any areas in which to rent that are on the cheaper side? I have been trying to contain my search to Minneapolis and St. Paul, but suddenly realized the other day that maybe I didn't have to. Previously I always felt I needed to live along buslines because I don't have a car, but on thinking about it, I really don't leave my house enough to justify that limit on my location as long as I have stable access to UbeLyft and grocery delivery. So I thought I'd see if anyone had any suggestions of places to expand my apt search to? Also, I have email searches running on Kregslist and Zillo, any other pages I should be poking? Looking for studio or 1 bedroom, with a max rent of 800. I know my pickings will be suuuuper slim and that's fine, I have a place to be for now and I don't have a rush to move. I would just like to find a place with AC because my current place has none and after 5 years of struggling with a crappy window unit I've more than hit my limit as someone with a heat sensitivity.
Even if it's not 800 or below but on the lower end, still post here? I'm keeping it that low just in case because I'm currently in an internship that's ending in August and so until I know what my next steps are, I'm trying to keep things at or around what I've been successfully able to pay in the past, but knowing about locations would still be useful if I find out I can afford higher on a long-term basis. In case it's helpful info, terrible credit score, but proof of income and a 5 year rental history with no late/missed payments—added in case anyone happens to be looking to rent or knows any landlords 🤞
Thanks for any tips!

God. My brother is an emotional trainwreck, constantly. I have plenty of emotional problems of my own (and they really suck, but it makes me funnier) but I'm usually calm and collected. He's just so dumb tho, like outright oblivious to everything and he never learns. He just started screaming at me b/c I was angry with him about our fast food orders. The way he goes about everything is just so over-the-top, it's ridiculous. We share a room atm, but he just barges in and starts talking to me, or changing his entire outfit like, "It's cool. we're both dudes." (mental process presumably) and I have told him to not do that. We were home alone today; He could've changed his clothes standing in the living room, for Christ's sake! But no, he came into the only room in the house that contained another person to change. Stupid! Anyways, he barges in, like always, asking "Mom wants to know what you want from Sonic. What do you want from Sonic?" over and over in his silly-sounding, immature voice. So, obviously, I'm mad, and I couldn't possibly have explained why in that moment, so to him, I'm just mad. He realizes and becomes practically belligerent, yelling "What do you want? What do you want!?" He just so jumpy and unstable and it pisses me off b/c I'm very go-with-the-flow and he's just go-. He calls our mom back and tells her, making it sound like I'm just an asshole, so I come in there to him and he gives me the phone (and note, it's my mom on the phone, so I'm now speaking directly to the person getting the food) and he keeps asking what I want, as if telling him will make a difference now! As soon as someone else has his phone, even if he gave it to them, he goes apeshit. So now he's acting like a meth-head, trying to get his next bump of internet. So I go back to my room to try to calmly tell my mom what I want, and he's basically trying to rip the door down so he can get his fix. She tells me to text it, so I do, and meanwhile lil bro's going bananas outside. I give him his phone, but he hits the door again, I suppose to make a statement. I walk outside our room, tell him to shut the hell up b/c he's being childish, he loses his marbles and starts screaming. I walk towards him and he hurriedly walks back to the couch, pretending not to be scared. I say "Yeah I thought so." and he comes back and yells again. At this point I'm pissed and I'm threatening him, blah blah blah. I walk towards him again, so now he is out of my sight, yelling. Just shut up! If you don't wanna get your ass beat don't talk like you won't! Idiot.

My child has cancer and we are at the hospital multiple times each week. I drive a large Dodge Mega Cab and can’t fit into any of the hospitals parking garages and there is no street parking. I have to valet and have been noticing odd things. So I took a pic of my dash and when I got back into my truck after our last treatment, noticed that I lost 4 actual miles of my odometer and 14 off my diesel mileage. I’m sure there are much nicer cars that they might joyride in than my truck and they know my child has cancer. WTH happened to my mileage and what can I do about it going forward? The travel expenses are really adding up and it adds such a stressor on top of my child battling this illness. To come up with the extra money for diesel and parking at this rate is tough and every mile adds up. I am asking this question in good faith with no expectations

I'm 31 years old, live in NJ. 5'9", 165 lbs (fit/athletic build) 3rd generation Chinese American (my family immigrated here in the 1900s). My family identifies as American as we tend to eat more pasta than rice and my generation has not learned the language. College educated with a Bachelor's in Biomedical Science (switched from an Engineering major...turns out I don't like theoretical math); currently working in the pharmaceutical industry and pretty much love the industry as there isn't any work drama and it's relatively straightforward yet challenging.
I've tried a few long distance relationships and they're quite difficult to manage...they were great when we able to meet in person and I didn't mind putting in the extra work. I'd be willing to try one if the distance is reasonable and the there is a definite spark between us. I am pretty sure I fit the definition of a demisexual, so I'll be strictly trying to form a connection first. I REALLY need the emotional connection before there is a sexual attraction, mentally I can't do hook ups (they're just really hard for me to handle and I have turned people down).
Personality wise I've been told that I tend to bring people together and keep things fun. I have a few different groups of friends and communities I am often with...and they can vary from the youngsters (21 to 30) to the old guys (60+) to the group that's around my age. I would say I'm pretty good at conversing and I try to stay on top of most current events. Mentally I'm an old man and feel more comfortable in that setting, so much that I literally hang out with 60+ years olds at the gym after a workout in the hot tub. I call them the hot tub gang and it's always a set of regulars where we might talk about the same thing every single day until someone newer to the group says that we talked about it yesterday.
I would say fitness is a major player in my life. I started out hating swimming as a kid, but here I am almost 27 years later...I made it through the lessons at the YMCA, joined a club team, swam in high school, swam in college and now I'm a swim coach and instructor as a hobby/side job in my free time. There's something about being a part of coaching people and watching them grow up and succeed that makes me smile.
My free time in the cold months usually consists of planning DIY projects or working on them. I tend to work on all the cars in the family and am the one that fixes them up or finds replacements for them. Or planning my next road trip to somewhere nicer. Whereas in the warm months I love going down to the beach to go for a swim and have a nice relaxing breakfast outdoors. I do have a few kayaks that I'll bring out to go with friends or if I feel it's safe a nice solo paddle to clear my mind. When I think about it, too many of my hobbies involve water. But I do enjoy things on dry land I promise!
I'm really looking for someone I can grow together with, a long term or forever relationship. I want a relationship where both of us put 100% in all the time and if we don't, we can talk to each other about our concerns and work it out. Honestly what I've realized is that maybe I am altruistic...I miss making someone feel happy and loved, miss the good morning texts, the waiting around all day just to see their texts, I miss spoiling someone and the feeling of that feeling of seeing that look that you get when someone truly loves you. I would love to slowly get to know you by having some conversations where the time just flies, then to a point where we talk nonstop, maybe some in person dates and then maybe eventually settle down together and enjoy life together.
Important stuff: Although I enjoy interacting with kids and it's a major part of my life...I don't want any of my own so...sorry if this is a dealbreaker for anyone. I don't drink (except for maybe wine at special occasions....I get really bad Asian Flush so I'll turn bright red if I smell alcohol essentially lol), not into smoking/drugs (Bad asthma and I'm just not into any of that stuff). I don't judge anyone that's into drinking or recreational drugs, it's just not for me personally. Religion wise, I'm Agnostic. Politically I lean relatively to the left.
I'm really searching for that genuine connection; voice calls are definitely a plus and would love to get to know you. It's alright if we end up just as friends that talk here and there.
If it sounds like you could be the one send me a chat or DM and tell me a bit about yourself. My name is Kevin and I'd love to know about you.

I'm 31 years old, live in NJ. 5'9", 165 lbs (fit/athletic build) 3rd generation Chinese American (my family immigrated here in the 1900s). My family identifies as American as we tend to eat more pasta than rice and my generation has not learned the language. College educated with a Bachelor's in Biomedical Science (switched from an Engineering major...turns out I don't like theoretical math); currently working in the pharmaceutical industry and pretty much love the industry as there isn't any work drama and it's relatively straightforward yet challenging.
I've tried a few long distance relationships and they're quite difficult to manage...they were great when we able to meet in person and I didn't mind putting in the extra work. I'd be willing to try one if the distance is reasonable and the there is a definite spark between us. I am pretty sure I fit the definition of a demisexual, so I'll be strictly trying to form a connection first. I REALLY need the emotional connection before there is a sexual attraction, mentally I can't do hook ups (they're just really hard for me to handle and I have turned people down).
Personality wise I've been told that I tend to bring people together and keep things fun. I have a few different groups of friends and communities I am often with...and they can vary from the youngsters (21 to 30) to the old guys (60+) to the group that's around my age. I would say I'm pretty good at conversing and I try to stay on top of most current events. Mentally I'm an old man and feel more comfortable in that setting, so much that I literally hang out with 60+ years olds at the gym after a workout in the hot tub. I call them the hot tub gang and it's always a set of regulars where we might talk about the same thing every single day until someone newer to the group says that we talked about it yesterday.
I would say fitness is a major player in my life. I started out hating swimming as a kid, but here I am almost 27 years later...I made it through the lessons at the YMCA, joined a club team, swam in high school, swam in college and now I'm a swim coach and instructor as a hobby/side job in my free time. There's something about being a part of coaching people and watching them grow up and succeed that makes me smile.
My free time in the cold months usually consists of planning DIY projects or working on them. I tend to work on all the cars in the family and am the one that fixes them up or finds replacements for them. Or planning my next road trip to somewhere nicer. Whereas in the warm months I love going down to the beach to go for a swim and have a nice relaxing breakfast outdoors. I do have a few kayaks that I'll bring out to go with friends or if I feel it's safe a nice solo paddle to clear my mind. When I think about it, too many of my hobbies involve water. But I do enjoy things on dry land I promise!
I'm really looking for someone I can grow together with, a long term or forever relationship. I want a relationship where both of us put 100% in all the time and if we don't, we can talk to each other about our concerns and work it out. Honestly what I've realized is that maybe I am altruistic...I miss making someone feel happy and loved, miss the good morning texts, the waiting around all day just to see their texts, I miss spoiling someone and the feeling of that feeling of seeing that look that you get when someone truly loves you. I would love to slowly get to know you by having some conversations where the time just flies, then to a point where we talk nonstop, maybe some in person dates and then maybe eventually settle down together and enjoy life together.
Important stuff: I don't drink (except for maybe wine at special occasions....I get really bad Asian Flush so I'll turn bright red if I smell alcohol essentially lol), not into smoking/drugs (Bad asthma and I'm just not into any of that stuff). I don't judge anyone that's into drinking or recreational drugs, it's just not for me personally. Religion wise, I'm Agnostic. Politically I lean relatively to the left.
I'm really searching for that genuine connection; voice calls are definitely a plus and would love to get to know you. It's alright if we end up just as friends that talk here and there.
If it sounds like you could be the one send me a chat or DM and tell me a bit about yourself. My name is Kevin and I'd love to know about you.