I moved into a rental off of Zillow almost a year ago. I signed a 2 year lease.. upon moving in during a heat wave, I quickly realized the AC didn’t work. It was over 100 degrees in the house so I had to get a hotel for 3 weeks (was never compensated, still had to pay rent). Once the AC downstairs was fixed, the AC upstairs broke. (Was fixed a couple weeks later).
The house was never cleaned upon moving in (we were told a cleaning crew came by the day before) - we found dead roaches everywhere! Even in the oven. Mouse poop in the kitchen..
The second week in the home a huge leak in the ceiling poured water all over the living room. A pipe broke under the home, cost me 1k (filed an appeal with the county, still hoping to get my $ back).
The sink broke in the bathroom and ruined all over my makeup that was stored beneath it.
I kept hearing an animal in the attic (landlord took forever to get someone out) and it finally had babies … the babies fell through the ceiling. I hired an exterminator, was never compensated. Oh, and the animal brought it fleas.. we have 3 dogs.. you can see where this is going.
I now have giant flies (like hundreds of them) in every room in our house. There’s a horrible stench coming from the bathroom where most of the flies are (I mentioned this smell weeks ago and they did send a plumber, but he couldn’t figure out where the smell was coming from)
What id like to know is, after so many issues.. am I entitled to break my lease? Or ask for a reduced amount? It’s one thing after another and I am a full time student/working. I don’t have time to keep dealing with these headaches. I love where I live and the home is beautiful but all of these issues are beginning to stress me out. I’ve also developed a weird rash since moving in that doctors cannot figure out how to treat. I’m at a complete loss.
Any suggestions?

I moved into a rental off of Zillow almost a year ago. I signed a 2 year lease.. upon moving in during a heat wave, I quickly realized the AC didn’t work. It was over 100 degrees in the house so I had to get a hotel for 3 weeks (was never compensated, still had to pay rent). Once the AC downstairs was fixed, the AC upstairs broke. (Was fixed a couple weeks later).
The house was never cleaned upon moving in (we were told a cleaning crew came by the day before) - we found dead roaches everywhere! Even in the oven. Mouse poop in the kitchen..
The second week in the home a huge leak in the ceiling poured water all over the living room. A pipe broke under the home, cost me 1k (filed an appeal with the county, still hoping to get my $ back).
The sink broke in the bathroom and ruined all over my makeup that was stored beneath it.
I kept hearing an animal in the attic (landlord took forever to get someone out) and it finally had babies … the babies fell through the ceiling. I hired an exterminator, was never compensated. Oh, and the animal brought it fleas.. we have 3 dogs.. you can see where this is going.
I now have giant flies (like hundreds of them) in every room in our house. There’s a horrible stench coming from the bathroom where most of the flies are (I mentioned this smell weeks ago and they did send a plumber, but he couldn’t figure out where the smell was coming from)
What id like to know is, after so many issues.. am I entitled to break my lease? Or ask for a reduced amount? It’s one thing after another and I am a full time student/working. I don’t have time to keep dealing with these headaches. I love where I live and the home is beautiful but all of these issues are beginning to stress me out. I’ve also developed a weird rash since moving in that doctors cannot figure out how to treat. I’m at a complete loss.
Any suggestions?

So boyfriend and I have been dating for 2 years. It’s been very good and we are very much on the same page with our future and what we want, house, kids etc. We make over $250K per year and equally split, we work very hard career wise and being financially set was important for both of us. Boyfriend and I have lived separately throughout our relationship but I’ve put in my notice to leave my apartment July 1st. Plan is to move in together, either at his or move into a rental home temporarily until we buy a home together. Id be happy to buy right away but I’m also fine to wait another year and experience living together first.
Here’s where it gets interesting- boyfriend has younger sister that moved in with him in September. She hasn’t been successful holding a job in the past, has some serious mental health issues (depression, anxiety, PTSD) has no education and has a 65 lb dog. Originally this situation was temporary to allow her to get back on her feet - look for a job or apply to a diploma program or something to get ahead in life. We were thinking by March she should be able to move out.
Here it is almost June, sister just started a minimum wage job working 15-20 hours a week. She has no savings and spends whatever money she makes on vapes, cigarettes, junk food and dog supplies. She pays no rent nor does she split groceries that my boyfriend and I have supplied since September. I help buy dog food and fill her car with gas, etc. I’ve done what I can to improve her life and make sure she was welcome and comfortable, as I spend a lot of time at my boyfriends and truly wanted to help her feel less stressed financially so she could focus on what she wanted to do for work or school. I would chat with her all the time about opportunities or programs. She spent all of winter not working and not leaving the apartment, severely depressed. We paid for her gym membership and took her with us whenever we could etc. I really feel that we did all we could to help her out. She has a therapist and medication and social supports, etc. I don’t see her being able to be successful on her own any time soon, the rental market in our area is expensive and a minimum wage part time job is not going to cut it. Also many rentals do not allow a larger dog.
I’m wondering what to do here. This sister situation has been a huge roadblock in my relationship with my boyfriend and our future and our chance to move forward. They live in a 2 bedroom suite, so there isn’t really room for me to move in, nor do I really want to in the current situation. It’s tight and honestly I’m so used to having more privacy and space at mine. I really crave one on one alone time with my boyfriend and we have sacrificed it so much to make her feel welcome and help her life improve.
My boyfriend and I are both financially ready to buy a house and move forward but we are now tied to being financially and personally responsible for this sister. The parents are struggling financially and health wise so they cannot take on this daughter of theirs. We have decided she and the dog are moving with us in this next chapter of either renting or buying a house.
I do recognize this situation may improve when we all have more space and maybe a basement for her to have her own area. However, I do not want to become resentful for a dependant I did not ask to be responsible for? I do not want to be resentful for not having the opportunity to live alone with my boyfriend and work on our relationship. I want a family and I also want to fully enjoy this next chapter of life we have both worked and saved for so long for!
How do I best set boundaries or a time frame to help this sister move on and live independently?
I fear we have made it to comfortable that she has no desire to pay her own rent or groceries, let alone live a full filling life of her own.

Hello,
I am posting here because I have a genuine question about microplastics I was about to consume. I posted this on my hometown’s subreddit, Houston, but I think the MODs there might be censoring my inquiry. HEB has a HUGE fan base here. See below:
Hello everyone,
I bought some shrimp at the HEB Montrose Market, Thursday of last week. Something I do regularly. I was making Shrimp Alfredo. As I was peeling, divining and cleaning the shrimp, I noticed that there was a blue strip inside of one of the shrimp. It looked like a little piece of plastic.
I ended up removing the tiny piece of plastic and just gave that one shrimp to my dog. I made sure to be more thorough with the rest of the shrimp.
Should I bring it up to their attention? I’d hate for someone’s (worse, a child) consume plastic. Has anyone else experienced something similar?
Unfortunately, microplastics in fish is something not unheard off.

Context: We are both 32, met on neopets at age 11, met in person at age 14, didn’t see each other again until 2022 but remained close friends online.
In the summer of 2022, I was going through the absolute worst part of my life. Early June, I went on vacation out of state, and though I was in a 10 year relationship at the time, I didn’t talk to my at the time girlfriend much. Our relationship was cratering because she was struggling with alcoholism and depression. I was trying to figure out a way to break things off in a clean way, unwind our financial and living situation, etc. During this vacation, we didn’t talk much. It was tense and frankly exhausting. Instead, every day, from morning til night, I was talking to my now ex. Mind you… I wasn’t cheating. I didn’t have feelings for her at the time. We were both just in a bad place - her dealing with the father of her 3 children cheating on her, and still living with him, me, dealing with a failing relationship I desperately needed out of. To be honest, most of our conversations were about work, where our relationships went wrong, and our kids. My son from another relationship ship is low functioning intelligence / autistic, which also caused a lot of issues - my partner at the time did try to accept this and be a mother figure but deep down, it was too difficult for her.
I get back home, and in the span of two weeks, my life fucking cratered. I’m talking about cinema grade levels of shit hit the fan.

1. My son burned my garage down to the studs while I was asleep - I had to run and pull him out of a burning garage, get my then girlfriend out of bed, and get our dog outside. We didn’t have a fire extinguisher so it was, so far, my closest near death experience
2. I was forced out of a company I co-founded by my 2 business partners, losing a 125k year salary, just months before the company was purchased for approximately 10,000,000 - my share would have been 10%
3. My at the time girlfriend went to a routine doctors appointment - a woman who struggled with alcoholism, has pcos and ovarian cysts, with what we were told an almost 0% fertility rate….was 7 months pregnant.

My son was held in the care of the local state children’s hospital for mental and physical examination. My home was in shambles, and the insurance company dragged their feet throughout the entire ordeal. I was reeling from a massive financial blow and loss of identity in a lot of ways, because that company felt like my life’s mission. My current gf and I split up, she moved out to live with her aunt, and it wasn’t pretty. I was so angry, so defeated.
I had a complete mental breakdown. I’m talking, I flew my mother in town to help with daily tasks. I couldn’t function. I lost about 30lbs, lost many friendships both personal and professional.
But this woman was there for me. She was a shoulder to cry on. She bore the brunt of my mental and emotional exhaustion and never pushed me away, never looked at me differently. We were drawn to each other during this time of complete fucking chaos, and one night, I hit on her. I threw out some bait, she took it, and we met up for the first time since we were teenagers.
We hit it off tremendously. It was like we hadn’t been apart a day in our lives. We both fell in love, quickly, as I began to rebuild my life, welcome a new child into the world, repair my home, work on myself professionally. She was there, through all of it, and she made it easier. I could lean on her, I could look forward to her, no matter what life had thrown me, I thought I had found my soulmate in this woman I’ve known longer than anyone. So, we started to date.
It was difficult in the beginning. She had to move out of her ex boyfriends house and get an apartment. This took a lot of time and planning because she was working a retail job and hadn’t been on her own in 7 years. This man was abusive, controlling, and eventually she managed to get an apartment with her mother to get away from him. He was furious that after a year of the two of them being broken up, that we got together. He wrongfully assumed I’d been in the wings all these years, which couldn’t be farther from the truth - he had cheated on her and she left him and refused to reconcile. It took a few months but she got an apartment. This was difficult for her, she left a nice area and moved to a low income area. She could only see her kids 50% of the time. Transportation was rough between both towns. It put a huge strain on her mentally.
I, meanwhile, did what I could. In the beginning I went out of my way to see her at every opportunity I could. I’d take her out to dinner often, visit her at work, stay over at her apartment. She’d come over to my house. It wasn’t easy - I bought my home just as Covid started to rock the housing market, and I had to land in a rural town. So we had 45 miles between us. I was also busy dealing with life without a live in partner, facilitating my sons care, and having my newborn 50% of the time.
But it was good, I thought. We got along well, it was electric, it was our escape. About a year into the relationship, the mother of my child had to move back into my spare room. She was struggling and I was not going to turn her or my daughter away in the time of need, it was not even a consideration. My ex understood, but acknowledged the pressure it put on us both mentally and emotionally - my house was now, effectively, off limits. This greatly reduced the time we could see each other. We’d go 2-3 weeks without getting together, with our only time between managing our schedules being maybe 2-3 hours on a random day, or a quick outing. Our relationship devolved quickly into a FWB situationship, and this is where the mistakes were made.
I didn’t see it at the time, but that’s all we really had. I was complacent and aloof, a little distant, and just… okay only seeing her every now and then. I think deep down I wanted more but it became such an insurmountable hurdle to put together. During this next part of the year or so remaining, she began to fall out of love with me. She told me that she felt like we were just FWB, stagnant, and going nowhere. She was dealing with depression, openly despising herself, and struggling to see a future with me. I realized that my complacency was to blame, but to a certain degree, she too was complacent.
Instead of voicing her concerns, talking options, solutions on how to build a life together, she sunk into her depression.l, and her feelings faded. I guess the how’s turned into why’s, and the what ifs turned into oh well. I do acknowledge I took on a huge responsibility dating a single mother of 3, but…. After learning these things from her the last few days, I realized.
I never felt like a team. We were together in flesh and bond only, we never discussed our future. We didn’t plan, we merely hoped. And we drifted away from each other, and in the end, it became too much for her to bear, and being alone felt like the best solution for her. She left me 2 weeks ago after bringing these issues to light. Initially I was devastated. I collected my thoughts and spoke with her last night.
I told her, I did want more, but I got comfortable, and so did you for a bit. We were stagnant because neither of us pushed the other forward. I wanted to be a team, I wanted to work towards something, but the opportunity just slipped through our hands. I begged. I pleaded. I told her, I’d do whatever I can to build a life for us. I own my home, it’s small, but it’s something. I can work harder, I can figure things out, I can work towards pulling together the things we need. I can be more present, more attentive. Because despite the both of us checking out to an extent, I very much still love her.
I feel and see her everywhere in my daily life. I cling to her, I dream of her, I long for her. I feel like the deck was so stacked against us, that we both bit off more than we could chew. But in the end, she didn’t want to keep trying, she didn’t see a future, and I’m stuck picking up the pieces and so desperately wanting things to work.
She told me to move on, to heal, to grow stronger and become a better person. She has no hard feelings, no contempt or regret. She just lacks the physical, mental, and emotional capacity to have a relationship, and that she doesn’t want to. But I still can’t shake the fact that I really thought I had found my person. I love this woman. I…. I wasn’t ready to stop. I risked so much, pushed through so much adversity to bring us together, but in the end, it just wasn’t enough.
It sucks. I’m devastated, defeated. I truly feel like life looked me in the eyes and said no, you are not good enough for this. I blocked her this morning because I realize she has made her peace and moved on, and that I will only drag her down, push her away, and erode my dignity at every turn, because I am still struggling to accept no for an answer. She didn’t cheat on me, she didn’t abuse me. We never fought, argued. We got along so, so, so well. She was the most important person in my life outside of my children, and I failed to show her that. And I feel in some ways, she failed me too. Because when it got hard, challenging, when it became time to work on life together, she got spooked, spiraled, and…. Gave up. She gave up on us.
I thank you for reading. It’s disorganized and insane because frankly I don’t know how to put all of this on paper. I’m going into therapy next month to revisit a lot of the issues I faced before her and to understand life after her and what went wrong. I have never felt a void like this in my life, there is a her shaped hole in my life and just….. this is just another level of pain.

(Picky with high tiers) (also not good at cross trade value!)

First / Patreon (Read 5 Chapters Ahead)

AKA: Ain’t Nothing but a Horndog
–
Private Owens let out another tired sigh as he sat there, his head held in his hands. After the incident with Petra, he’d been forcibly confined to his room, pending further disciplinary action. It didn’t take a genius to figure out exactly how he was going to be disciplined; at best, he figured he’d be getting a court martial. At worst, they’d probably just throw him out the airlock or something.
Harsh, to be sure, but if he’d actually succeeded in inadvertently costing humanity their spot as a central player on the galactic stage, then no punishment was truly out of the question. Hell, Major Barnes had talked about having him drawn and quartered, and if he truly had fucked up that monumentally bad, then it wasn’t even out of the question.
“Way to go, idiot…” Owens muttered to himself. “All this because you couldn’t stay away from the booze or keep it in your pants for a night…”
He let out yet another sigh of despondency, bringing a hand up to brush through his auburn-colored hair. He’d just had it cut short, which was a good thing, because it meant that he’d actually look presentable at his soon-to-be funeral.
Assuming Major Barnes let him keep his head, of course.
Just as that thought crossed his mind, the door to his quarters opened. Owens looked up, and was not surprised to see Major Barnes and Captain Johnson standing there. Somehow, they looked even more imposing than usual, which was odd given that Major Barnes was from Texas and built like the bulls he used to ride, while Captain Johnson was a former MMA fighter.
That was to say that if there were any two people the higher-ups would have sent to beat him to death with their bare hands, it’d be these two, to say nothing of the fact that they’d probably outright requested it given what he’d done.
Assuming they weren’t about to lead him to Captain Ulfur or something, of course. Couldn’t exactly discount that as a possibility, either.
“Alright, on your feet,” Major Barnes announced.
Private Owens blinked. “Sir?”
“I said, on your feet. Are you going to make me repeat myself again?”
“N-no, Sir.” Owens scrambled to his feet. He stood there at attention, doing his best not to start sweating bullets as Major Barnes leaned in to examine him, one hand on his chin.
“Hm…”
“Sir?”
The two of them locked eyes, Barnes’ set of brown staring into Owens’ green. And despite his best efforts, Owens couldn’t help but begin sweating then and there. Captain Johnson shifted a bit out of the corner of his eye, but Owens didn’t dare look over to him; experience had taught him that, much like a T-Rex, the Major’s vision was based on movement. This wasn’t to imply that he could only see things when they moved, but rather that moving was a good way to draw attention to oneself, in the same way that the squeaky wheel tended to get the grease.
To put it simply: predators enjoy it greatly when their prey tries to struggle. And at this moment in time, Owens was nothing if not the juiciest piece of prey available to his commanding officers on the whole station.
The seconds ticked by. Owens dared not count them, both because he didn’t want to press his luck and because he dreaded finding out how short eternity actually was. Finally, after those few agonizingly slow seconds passed, Major Barnes took a step back and let his hand fall from his chin, then clasped his arms behind his back.
“You have no idea how fucking lucky you are, Marine.”
Owens stiffened. “Sir?”
Major Barnes let out a tired sigh, then turned to Captain Johnson. “Smoking is still banned on this station, right?”
“It is outside of the dedicated smoking zones,” Johnson replied. “It upsets the Vuks’ sense of smell.”
“Damn… what about drinking?”
“Allowable outside of working hours, but I’d like to remind you that alcohol is what got us into this mess in the first place.”
“Ah, yes.” Major Barnes turned back towards Owens, his eyes narrowing. “Now, Private – perhaps you’d care to answer a question for me?”
“O-of course, Sir,” Owens stammered out.
“What in the hell made you think Jack Daniels was your friend?”
Owens felt a chill go down his spine. “Uh, Sir?”
“Stop phrasing my title like a question, please. Answer the question.”
Owens hesitated. Thankfully, Captain Johnson came to his rescue.
“Actually, if I remember right, the bartender said he was ordering Captain Morgan and tequila.”
Barnes let out a low whistle. “Damn, for real? What were you thinking, Private? You know rum and tequila don’t mix.”
“Apparently, he hasn’t heard how racist Captain Morgan is – everyone knows the Captain hates Mexicans.”
“U-um…” Private Owens said. “...Is this you both smoking me out?”
“Of course not, Private,” Major Barnes instantly replied. “After all, we’re not in a smoking area, remember?”
Private Owens wasn’t sure if the Major was trying to be dangerously sarcastic or if that was a genuine attempt at levity. In either case, he thought it best to stay silent. Finally, after a few more seconds had passed, Major Barnes shook his head.
“I mentioned earlier that you were lucky,” he said. “Hell, you’re probably the luckiest man alive. Possibly the luckiest man in history. Do you know why that is?”
“Because I’m not dead yet?”
“Partially, but no. No, you’re the luckiest man alive because, in spite of you making a drunken ass of yourself and banging their head diplomat, the Vuk voted to allow us into the Council, after all.”
Private Owens couldn’t help but sputter in surprise at that news. He took a moment to recover, then turned back towards the Major, surprise etched across his face. “You’re serious?” After a moment, he added, “Sir?”
“Oh, I’m very serious,” Major Barnes confirmed with a nod. “See how lucky you are, Private? Not only did you get laid, but you also somehow didn’t completely fuck everything up for our entire species, which means that I very unfortunately don’t get to space you.”
Private Owens hesitated. Next to him, Captain Johnson crossed his arms. “Breathe, Private. You look like you’re about to pass out.”
Owens did as he was told, sucking in a deep breath of air before exhaling it. Once he had taken a breath to calm himself, he opened his eyes again, once more staring at Major Barnes.
“So, if you don’t mind me asking, Sir… what happens now?”
“Good question,” Barnes replied. “Well, given that you might have actually done all of humanity a huge solid by sleeping with Petra, there’s not really much I can do to actually punish you. I mean, I could, but that’d reflect pretty badly on me, and if there’s one thing I care about, it’s my service record.”
“Immaculate service record,” Captain Johnson amended. “Downright radiant, really.”
“Exactly. And it’d really suck to mar it by having to write a young Marine for something like this, especially since it’s very possible that the only reason Petra voted yes was because the sex was so good.”
Private Barnes flushed red. “U-um… thanks, Sir. I think.”
“Don’t be so modest, Private – you know women talk. Well, word’s apparently gotten around, and now a fair few of the Vuk women are very curious about how the human mouth works. But that’s neither here nor there; the point is, we’re at a bit of an impasse. I can’t exactly smoke you for this, even though I really want to. But at the same time, I can’t just let you off the hook, either.”
“So… what do you plan to do with me, Sir?”
Major Barnes cracked a wide, wicked-looking grin. A chill went down Owens’ spine at the sight of it.
“Why, it’s simple, Private,” Barnes began, “in this situation, I think it only fitting that I throw you to the wolves… or, in this case, the devil dogs.”
Owens didn’t even have time to beg for mercy before Captain Johnson grabbed him and muscled him out the door, over to the barracks where the rest of his platoon was staying.
–
It wasn’t a surprise to Owens when they opened the door to the barracks and roughly shoved him inside, then closed it back up and locked it. He scrabbled at the door in vain for a moment before pausing and turning around.
His entire platoon was there, because of course they were.
Owens froze at the sight of them. Getting smoked by the Major and the Captain was bad enough, but that was nothing compared to the absolute fucking firestorm that was headed his way from the rest of the platoon. Slowly, he raised a hand.
“Uh, hey, guys,” he offered.
For a moment, nobody said or did anything. It was deathly silent in the barracks. But then, it happened.
Someone started the slow clap.
It began as just one person, but rapidly grew to two, and then three, and then all of a sudden, they were all doing it. And as they clapped, they were shouting at him, or rather, they were chanting – one simple word, which ordinarily wouldn’t have had much meaning, but with the way they were saying it, Owens just knew it was going to haunt him until he was discharged.
And that word was…
“Horn-Dog! Horn-Dog! Horn-Dog!”
Owens cringed as the word reached his ears. Unfortunately, that did nothing to actually block it out, and it only got worse when everyone in the platoon came up, still chanting, and took turns slapping him on the back.
And, naturally, the questions followed shortly thereafter.
“What was it like?”
“Was it as good as she’s making it sound?”
“Are you really that good with your tongue?”
“What’s it like being an actual furry?”
“Guys!” Owens finally blurted out, having had enough. “Look, I’ve… I’ve had a bit of a long day, you know? So can I at least take a seat before you start bombarding me with questions?”
The platoon fell silent at that. Owens breathed a sigh of relief, then began to stride through them; they parted like the Red Sea as he walked.
“Carefully,” one of them said, “he’s a hero.”
Owens flipped that guy off without even looking back. Finally, he reached his bunk and took a seat on it, then breathed a sigh of relief.
And the moment he was settled, the platoon was surrounding him once more, eager for him to answer their questions. Owens took a breath.
“Let me get one thing perfectly straight,” he said, “I don’t kiss and tell.”
“Dude, come the fuck on,” one of the men, Corporal Ramirez, protested. “You realize that she’s been telling her people about it, right?”
“For real, man,” Sergeant Douglas agreed with a nod. “Some of the Vuk females have been eye-fucking us ever since.”
“You can’t be serious.”
“Oh, I’m serious. Apparently, that tongue do be putting in the work.”
Owens’ brow furrowed. “That’s nasty, dude.”
“What the fuck are you talking about? You did it, not me! I’m just reporting some of the shit that’s been happening ever since you fucking gave Lassie the ol’ in-out.”
“First of all, don’t talk about her that way,” Owens warned. “I get that you’re just joking, but she’s still a diplomat, as well as the reason we’re even having this conversation right now. And not in that way!” He hurriedly added when he saw several of the men about to say something. “She was the deciding vote. If it weren’t for her coming through for us, we’d have been fucked.”
Corporal Ramirez hesitated, but only for a moment. “I mean-”
“Dude, don’t.”
“I’m just saying-”
“I am seriously begging you not to say it.”
Ramirez paused, but eventually, his baser instincts won out. “...She definitely did come through for us, and at least one of us was definitely fucked.”
Owens closed his eyes and sucked in a deep breath before opening them again. “...Just for that, I’m not gonna tell you all what it was like.”
“Dude, come on,” Sergeant Douglas protested. “You’re really gonna do us like this? You’re gonna just fucking Captain Kirk it up and then refuse to talk about it?”
“Yes, I-” Owens paused. “...Captain Kirk?”
“Yeah.”
“Really?”
“Hey, you’re the first human to actually fuck an alien, at least as far as anyone knows. It fits.”
“No, no, I’m not complaining, it’s just… I can’t be Shepard?”
“The fuck you talking about? You’re no Shepherd, that’s for sure.”
“What makes you say that?”
“Because you couldn’t keep the wolf away.” Owens glared at him and Douglas just rolled his eyes. “Come on, Horndog, you’re just teeing these things up for me at this point. I can go all night.”
“Shame he couldn’t,” Ramirez added. “Or did he only stop because he got caught?”
“That’s a fair question, actually. Horndog, be honest – if you hadn’t been caught, would there have been another round?”
“How many rounds were there, anyway?” one of the other Marines asked.
“Do you think she’d have wanted breakfast afterwards?” another added. “Makes me wonder… do you think the Vuk prefer waffles, or pancakes?”
“I dunno, man. They seem pretty partial to creampies, if you ask me.”
“Guys!” Owens shouted, cutting them all off. He grit his teeth for a moment, but then let out another exhale. “...It probably goes without saying, but I am very, very, ridiculously tired right now. I’m very thirsty and I haven’t had anything to eat in a long-ass time.”
Ramirez opened his mouth to say something.
“Ramirez, if you say what I know you’re going to say, I will seriously fucking Code Red you by myself.”
Ramirez closed his mouth and said nothing.
Owens let out yet another exhale. “Look, fellas – let me just get some sleep, and then I’ll tell you as much as I can about it without it being disrespectful to her. Okay?”
“Sure, man, whatever you say,” Douglas offered.
“Thanks, guys.”
With that, Owens laid down in his bunk and closed his eyes, doing his best to enjoy the silence.
It lasted for all of five seconds before someone broke it.
“So, was this technically bestiality?”
Owens threw a blind punch, and just like that, the entire barracks erupted into chaos.

Special thanks to my good friend and co-writer, Ickbard, for the help with writing this story.

The front gate is closed now all the time. I walked in to see. There's a huge tree down that crushed a fence in the small dog section, leaving it open I think. Power on. I didn't see any other problems.
Anyone have any word when the park might reopen?
For others, the park is on the west side of N Hwy 6 near Patterson Rd.
Tks

My dog, Rottweile pit mix refuses to play with other dogs if I’m not outside with him.
All together there are 5 dogs at my house, 3 of them are my parents. My parents have 3 archers of property so we usually let the dogs run and play all day.
When I’m not home or at work my mom will let them out and he seems to play fine with the other dogs. When I’m home and I let him outside he just sits and stares off in the distance. Or he’ll just calmly sit at one of the doors and look through the window. If I leave my back door open, he’ll just come in and lay on my bed even if I’m not in the room.
When I do go out side, he just stands by me or just waits or follows me around wherever ever I go. He is receptive when I initiate play with him. When the other dogs join in it’s like he gives up. Am I doing something wrong?
He is a rescue dog. I think he is around two or three and I’ve had him for a year now. My other dog is a Belgian Malinois who is 1 1/2 and I’ve had him for almost the same amount of time. My mal plays well with the other dogs and is receptive to play. Most of the other dogs are about one year old too so maybe my rottie/pit is just slowed down? We have a 12 year old hound mix who still really loves to play with everyone until he can’t keep up anymore and lays down lol.
I don’t think this it’s a huge problem, I just feel bad that he acts kinda anti social when I’m around. Is there something I can be doing better?

Last updated 5/21/24 (Any updated servers at bottom)
Anyone stumbling upon this: About 3 months ago I literally went through every single community server, empty/full/whatever, and added any that sounded interesting, and didn't have crazy ping to Favorites (My region is Northeast US (NJ), FYI). I repeated the process twice. There are still a bunch of good ones out there (I've also had many solid ones in my favs for quite some time) I don't know if anyone cares but been around since Beta & have run a server before.
For reference:

• Good servers (to me): Emphasis on not being a dickhead, actually gets players, if running custom content it has to be tastefully done, not bloated & tacky, ping <100, anti-teamstacking measures
• "Bad" servers/what will not be here ( again this is just my opinion, also a couple exceptions ): Instant Respawn, 1 map or game mode only, more than 32 players, RTD, "friendly"/no combat servers, unmoderated racist/toxic BS
• Servers/settings I'm indifferent towards: Crits/Nocrits, Vanilla vs. Custom, Average skill level, 24 vs. 32 player, NSFW sprays, centered around niche/"weird" fandoms, Bullet/Damagespread, Class limits

Scroll down a few lines to my "To keep it simple..." header for the best ones. The following link is a much fuller list:

• Green line ones are my seal of approval
• Pink line ones I either haven't checked out as much but seem to be ok, or have 1 big issue or 2 I think holds them back from being fully recommended
• No underline = probably seemed interesting, haven't checked out at all, or never gets full

Full server list: https://i.imgur.com/qY2gCH9.png

To keep it simple, I think the best ones right now (for me are):

tiny kitty's girl pound - friendly community, runs really solid, nice-looking custom maps, Meme Maps Wednesday is a blast, always has people in it, just be wary of nsfw furry sprays (yeah I know...put cl_spraydisable 1 in console to disable)
1st server: 74.91.115.12:27015 2nd server: 74.91.113.115:27015
OPRAH's PETROL STATION - Friendly community, always has people in it, no goofy Instant Respawn which has no place in payload yet half of all community server owners see fit to do that, pre-round scramble
108.181.63.51:27015
-EOTL- Payload - same deal
74.91.114.223:27015
redsun.tf - This community is the poster child for tastefully modded custom game modes, and is very active. It's very well maintained & polished and even though I may not enjoy every game mode I've been very impressed by this server network (esp. as a former highly-modded community server owner). The EU one fills up most of the time, and I deal with the ping because it's a cool community (it even runs a Battle Royale mode that is surprisingly well-made). Their server "shop" is extremely impressive with the amount of customization available (Taunts, player skins, custom voicelines). I'd recommend downloading their asset pack here as it's fairly sizeable to DL upon server connect:
EU (actually gets players): 141.95.28.56:27015 US: 66.206.13.139:27015
Trigger Happy Gamers (EU) - Trigger Happy Gamers have been around forever and even though they are in the UK I deal with the ping to play with them because they are an awesome, fun, friendly community. Their main server gets reliably full from around 1 PM - 3 PM EST every day, and on the weekends a little longer. Their Nocrits server also gets full Saturday
main: 87.98.254.85:27015 Nocrits (gets full Saturdays @ 1 PM - 2 PM): 87.98.254.85:27025
Fucked in the Head - Another community that has been around forever. To be honest, they have equal respawn on Red & Blu, even for Payload, which I hate with a searing passion, HOWEVER, the regulars are entertaining af and give off vibes of drunk buddies goofing off and not giving a fuck that it almost offsets it. It's also decently populated.
216.52.148.223:27015
Skial Payload & Casual servers * - I never got the hate for this server network, decent spawn times, Halloween mode year round, no power tripping admins, feels like a bunch of randoms having a good time. You can also equip any weapon or cosmetic. The Payload+ EU in particular has some really chill/cool regulars, Dustbowl+ US some interesting/funny peeps. Payload US generally decent also. Their Autoscramble is also on point.
Payload+ EU 91.216.250.226:27015 Payload+ US 91.216.250.11:27015 Dustbowl+ US * (has become very stack-prone lately) 91.216.250.12:27015 ~~~~~
~Trying to get the word out that unlike their other servers, Casual is very barebones- no Instant Respawn, no RTD, normal map pool:
Casual NY 91.216.250.34:27015 Casual US 91.216.250.40:27015 Casual LA 91.216.250.21:27015 ~~~~~ Harvest (32-pl), also: 91.216.250.18:27015 ~~~~~
If you are super super new, their server network might be worth checking out, even if RTD, 2fort & other weird mods aren't my cup of tea: https://www.skial.com/servers/
Uncletopia - Pretty standard Casual experience except the skill level is generally higher, though it seems to be evening out honestly. And tbh from my experience people in these servers seem pretty cool. If you're looking for Vanilla I'd say this is your best bet.
https://uncletopia.com/servers
Southern Cross Gaming (Rainbow Swirl in particular) - Stumbled across this & played 1 round with these guys running a cool custom mode but apparently they run stock maps as well as custom maps/game modes. Their rules had a huge emphasis on keeping it fun & being respectful and everyone seemed really cool & laidback. It was full at peak time on the weekend. They also have other servers, even in other games & seem to have been around awhile:
IP: furfortress.com:27016 Site: https://www.scg.wtf/servers#team_fortress_2
ciggyland 18+ LGBT+ Furry server run by puppygirls
Funny, chill vibes, lots of custom maps. Seems to get full around peak time. Another diamond in the rough I discovered recently.
74.91.115.82:27015
Bad Weapon Rehabilitation (Vanilla US)
A really solid rebalancing of all weapons in-game. Nothing really feels overpowered or underpowered anymore, also fun things like flames stay on surfaces & I think spy or engy can radar enemies within a few feet or something to his team? It's really fun and gets full. Here's the site with IPs and stuff (The US server gets full around peak time, esp. on weekends)
(Yes this is the website): http://74.91.126.159/
redstar.gg - Arena server, the owner ComradeYazoo seems pretty dedicated to starting it up and I hop in whenever I can. Believe it or not it's still very fun with little people but it's gotten pretty packed a couple times. It also has like every good custom arena map, and scrambles if a team wins 3 in a row. North America I believe.
204.12.240.186:27015
Step in the Arena - Another Arena server I see get randomly populated on Saturday into Sundays around 11 P.M. - 2 A.M. EST. Probably missing a Discord announcement or something from a group of buddies.
172.240.237.2:27015
The Furry Pound - Some people list this one as one of the best non-UT for Vanilla TF2, however the one time I decided to give it a try I was met with some weird overly dramatic BS happening in Voice chat, and I heard someone else give a similar criticism the other day here. BUT, I've also seen people say they're ok. Might depend on what players/admins are on maybe, IDK:
Main server: thefurrypound.org:27015
shounic trenches (100-player TF2) - This goes against everything in my being but it's so unique and while not my cup of tea it's definitely a bunch of others'. Some maps such as pl_dbz_b5 & pl_dustbowl were created for this player count & people seem to have a lot of fun there. Again, I think 100 players is too much but I can't argue with how popular it is.
45.62.160.71:27015
UGC High Tower servers - They run no carts, so it's the TDM High Tower everyone's always dreamed of. They also run Instant Respawn and on any other map I hate that setting with a searing passion but because it's reworked as TDM I feel it actually improves the gameplay (put "high tower" including the space, and without quotes in the search box for a list of 'em in the following link):
https://www.ugc-gaming.net/servers/tf2/
UGC also runs other servers which I cannot vouch for but might be worth looking into.
Tropic Crisis Official Servers (NA, SA, EU)
These are the official servers for the Tropic Crisis project which is very very cool. I looked up their stats and most get full around standard peak hours.
Atlanta 155.138.213.202:27015 São Paulo 216.238.106.29:27015 Minsk 86.57.152.101:27025 Buenos Ares 45.235.99.105:27038
UEAKCrash's House of Nerds - official server of the mapmaker responsible for several very fun official maps. Runs a lot of very cool custom maps, Gets full on Fri, Sat night (must have a Discord/Twitch announcement I'd assume).
74.91.124.162:27015
Wolves Den - I'm going to make an exception to the "no "friendly"/non-combat server" thing (even though people seem down for combat ~50% of the time) because everyone just always seems to be having fun here. If you want to just screw around on interesting trade-type maps this is the place. Plus they have hilarious custom player models like velociraptors. (Has RTD)
162.248.92.33:27015
Samwiz1's Stupid Server - Another server I feel obligated to mention despite feeling like it's too much personally. Very goofy and people seem to have fun there.
173.237.52.135:27015
Swoocehut 2024 Workshop - Seems to be tied to a Discord as far as getting full, but runs a lot of custom maps apparently:
149.28.248.101:27015 Discord: https://swoocehut.com/discord Map rotation: https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2802508136
swagtown epic maps only no random crits 18+ - Suggested by someone on Steam Discussions. Looks alright- seems tied to a Discord as far as getting players, but got full last Tuesday @ standard peak hours. Looks like it runs stock & custom maps.
79.127.234.193:22136 Discord: [https://discord.gg/DTH3sMWsH8](discord.gg/DTH3sMWsH8)
TF2's Official VS Saxton Hale LOOS - 'Nuff said. Very laidback goofy atmosphere.
205.178.177.24:27027
GFL Clan (maybe???) - Someone said these guys are chill too, though I hate 2fort with a passion:
https://gflclan.com/forum/26-team-fortress-2/
Kogasatopia if you're desperate. They run some really fun mods, and solid (especially good gimmicky) custom maps, but their community is 4chan edgelords that like to say racial slurs. However their server is almost always full of people. Again, if you're truly desperate. Just mute chat & voice I guess by entering this in console (replace with 1's to re-enable)- hud_saytext_time 0;voice_enable 0
74.91.116.171:27015
The Weeabootique if you're desperate. Pretty much the same description as above. Mute chat & voice by entering this in console (replace with 1's to re-enable)- hud_saytext_time 0;voice_enable 0
198.245.61.57:27015
Custom Weapons servers (including a guide to the best one via TF2Classic)
More Arena Servers
pic of a dog

Hi im 17m and 2 on monday morning around 8am i was chilling at the park with my football i was playing alone for around 45min and then a teen girl approached me with her dog i guess that she’s around 14-16 yrs old she was well raised and politely asked me to take the ball for a few minutes to play with her dog and asked me to come if i wanted i said no and sat on my phone till she’s done
after a while she gave me the ball back and thanked me while going out of the field to the playground w her dog
And around 2 mins after she’s gone an old man came to me he was healthy and can walk freely and asked me why didn’t u play with her ? I said I don’t want to then he said ok how about u calling her again to the field and play w her for a while then we fuck her and run
I stayed silent for a while i was shocked…. Then i told him wtf? U want to rape a girl at that age ? R u serious? And he said why not? I looked at him in disgust and said fuck off and don’t touch her then he started to asking me to play football with him and kept chatting about different things even though im ignoring him and tell him to fuck off
i knew something was weird about him and honestly i was afraid of that weird conversation cus i thought he had a weapon with him or smth because he got a belt around he stomach while wearing a pajama after that he walked away ,
after that i got a call from school to come and take my certificate and i walked away while feeling concerned about leaving the girl and the man alone at the park but i noticed a man sitting in his car right of the park and i saw her huge dog then tried to stay in my car till the girl goes but i got a called again for being late
i still have some anger against this old man so im gonna be back to that park even though i have a test tomorrow but i can’t sleep while feeling concern about the girl everyday i will teach him a lesson tomorrow morning. But i don’t know if that’s the right thing cause i know i can’t control my anger and i might actually kill him so should i tell the girl about him or report him to the police even though i got no evidence??

Dilemma with Airbnb host treatment - no long showers allowed and dog peed on my suitcase and clothes - how should I respond? [Spain]
Hey folks just wanted to get your thoughts on this situation I had recently.
I booked a last minute Airbnb for 3 nights recently in a big Spanish city (Airbnb was outside city center for €40 per night). It was shared with the host (a boomer Spanish lady and her puppy dog). Nowadays, I filter with Guest Favorites and only look at listings where the host is rated over 4.80. This host had 50 reviews, was a super host and the listing was a guest favorite and had a rating of 4.92
I arrived midnight (prearranged well in advance with the host as check in is only until 23h according to the listing). I immediately go to bed without showering as I had one in the previous stay and was going to exercise the next day anyway. I spend all of next day outside and return at night and take a long shower (20-30 mins) before going to bed. I sleep in the next day and the host requests that I don’t shower so long (we communicate in basic French as she doesn’t know English and I don’t know Spanish)… I say all good, I’ll keep it shorter next time. I go inside and I’m in the bathroom for about 20 mins, brushing my teeth, taking a dump etc. and am careful to only take a shower between 5-10 max minutes. I get a message from the host later that evening (translated):
Host:
Hi Appliance7717, I wanted to let you know that tomorrow the departure is at 11 o'clock also because I have to leave, I also wanted to let you know that if you would take another shower I would ask you to keep it shorter, thank you Appliance7717.
Guest:
I showered for 5 minutes today. You want it to be shorter than that?
I did spend more time in the bathroom using the toilet, brushing my teeth etc.
Or I just can’t use the bathroom for long?
Host:
No please, if that's the case it's all right.
It's just that it's a huge expense for me.
I’m in the metro when I read this message and get all flustered and take the wrong train etc. and am a bit frustrated but whatever, I’ll check out sharp 11am tomorrow and get it over with. I’d booked a hostel for the next day anyway. I also missed out on seeing the meteorite (!) whilst all this was happening 😆 but I really think I shouldn’t be sweating about this shit on vacation and walking on eggshells over something so petty…
Anyway, next day rolls up and I scramble to get things packed up and ready so I don’t upset her by checking in after 11am. I’m basically on track to check out by 10:30. Now she has a dog, 🐕 which I didn’t mention - doesn’t seem to be well trained, barked quite a lot and woke me from my sleep earlier in the day but I didn’t make a fuss at all. I’m the 5 mins where I happened to be in the kitchen without closing my room’s door, it went and peed over my suitcase and clothes. It also took a sock, chewed it up and took it somewhere else. Mind you, the host didn’t mention anything about the possibility that the dog would be doing this. I’ve lived with dogs in airbnbs before and never had this issue. Nothing in the listing or house rules about taking long showers or what to do regarding the dog like keeping the door closed etc. She dabbed the pee with paper towels, and said that I should have closed the door but did say “Désole (sorry in French). I had to ask for disinfectant spray. I was upset and was banging my hand on the forehead and expressing regret but nothing more. She saw a pair of any shorts I’m soaked in urine but absolutely no offer to clean it, extend checkout etc. It seemed perfectly acceptable that this happened. It really rubbed me the wrong way. Super hosts are meant to go above and beyond in my view, and here she was struggling to be somewhat décent. We didn’t argue or anything there, if anything I was just a bit terse and we said au revoir and I left to go do the cleaning in my next place (took about 3 hours to get vinegar, bleach, hydrogen peroxide etc.)
Thinking of the Golden Rule, I’d never do this to somebody else if I were her. I’d offer compensation or something….
Anyway, my dilemma is that I wouldn’t have any hesitation going after a hefty compensation were it some young dude or couple as host. This lady doesn’t seem financially well off, seeing as taking a long shower has an impact on her profits. And I just feel kinda bad posturing me screwing over this old lady and her puppy dog for some cash. But I absolutely do not appreciate how I was treated and goes fundamentally against my sense of decency and fairness… I also hate how Airbnb has devolved to classify such hosts as superhosts.
What would you do if you were in my shoes? What do you think I should pursue? Should I ask for compensation? Leave a poor review? I see that she already left me a review on the afternoon that I checkout out. I have a feeling that she left a negative review - I noticed this from a previous guests review as well as what the host wrote about that guest.
Host’s review of Guest plus Guest’s response:
Guest, she is a polite and clean girl, but a great consumption of hot water and electricity, I am personally, these guests are not interested since for €134 I believe that as a host I am not interested , as a host I have not had any problems now, now I have only to wait for my electricity , water and gas bills, I am a person with very few resources, and from now on I do not accept promotions, because for it it is not profitable.
Dear Host, during my stay you didn't tell me anything. Other than that, I've never had any issues with other hosts. I was almost not at the house because I was visiting the city. I was just taking regular showers and was charging my phone and laptop when I needed it. What you wrote about me, I don't think it's true or fair and I'm really sorry to read that because I thought we had a great time the whole time.
Guest’s review of Host:
I had a nice stay at Host's place. It's good for 1-3 days since the room is very small and really suitable only for sleeping (no chair, table, ..). The location is okay, a bit far from the centre, but you can get everywhere by bus or by metro.

Hoping to find a local collage student to hire as a Personal Assistant. About 10 hours a week in the afternoons and evenings. Partly onsite and partly remote.
Huge plus for economy, business or Technology areas of study.
I have a small business, and other professional endeavors I would like assistance with.
As well as managing and organizing my personal life.
I need someone who I can give an objective to, and they will find the most efficient way to accomplish it and escalate to me after exhausting all other avenues.
Skills desired:

• Impeccable research and writing skills.
• Comfortable using ChatGPT to learn and accomplish tasks.
• Comfortable making and receiving phone calls.
• not afraid to tackle a diversity of tasks.
• Can do attitude and creative problem-solving is a must.

Tasks can include:

• Researching and reporting on topics
• reaching out to contacts to organize meetings
• Communicating with and managing freelancers
• filling out paperwork and organizing tasks
• Grocery ordering, meal planning
• Running Errands
• Dog walking
• plenty more I can think of

DM me if you are interested and provide a resume, your area of study if you are a student and 5 professional/Personal references I can contact.

i am 21 right now and i always had a dream as a kid when i was running around a room with ssome kind of kind of scp and i did not know what an scp was back then i was around 6-9 but i loved that dream for some reason first part i ran around a small apartment from my old apt down to the basment and i was chased by a weird creater that looked like a dog but was all grey and had no eyes and huges teeth i ran down to the basement and enterd a room second part of the dream there was a second huge ass fucking room and there was all kinds of pipes going around the place i ran to the same place as i always did and there sas a 20% chance i would start talking to some guy other wise there was a door leading to another room and then i woke up i never finnished that dream and i never understood it

Need Advice: Girlfriend Lost Job, Adopted a Puppy, Now Hates Me for Suggesting Return – Feeling Guilty and Unsure

Hey everyone,
I'm in a bit of a tough situation and could use some advice. My girlfriend recently lost her job and is currently unemployed. She lives with her handicapped mother. Over the past year, my girlfriend has made some decisions that haven't been the best, financially and otherwise.
A year ago, she got fired from a job and immediately went out and adopted a cat. Just last week, she lost another job and, despite everything, went out and got a very young puppy. I tried to explain to her that this might not be the best idea considering her current situation: she can't afford her own bills, and a puppy is a huge responsibility that requires a lot of time and attention, which she doesn't have due to her school commitments as she is currently taking a semester off to clean up her credit and finance, gym routine, and job hunting. Plus, it wouldn't be fair to place the additional responsibility of the puppy on her mother.
I see how much she loves the puppy, even though she’s only had it for a day. She was incredibly happy and excited about it. But after a lot of discussion, I convinced her to return the puppy. Now, she’s really upset with me, hates the idea of ever getting another dog again, and I'm feeling like absolute shit. I know she was really happy, and I feel like I've taken that away from her.
I was just trying to protect her from making a decision that might not be in her best interest, given her current life situation. But now I'm second-guessing myself. How do I deal with feeling so guilty? Any advice on how to navigate this situation and support her better?
Thanks in advance.

I wanted to get some nasturtium anyway as a companion plant for raspberries. There is some poison ivy growing in around the edges of the property through the fence, with a huge amount growing in the woods that is going to be hard to combat...I can't imagine the difficulty of pulling up every individual plant and not just have them come right back. But I have started making a path through the woods on our property, and I want to beat back the poison ivy from creeping into the path. I am open to planting anything in the woods that supports wildlife (preferably native/non invasive) and I'm already thinking about introducing plants that can grow wild with little maintenance that will feed the deer and other animals (maybe some for us too)
If I do a ton of work to destroy the poison ivy and plant nasturtium in its place, will that compete aggressively with the poison ivy to stop it from coming back? Will it overgrow all the native ferns etc?
If not, any suggestions for something that would fill that role? Zone 6A, northeastern USA. Need plants that are non-toxic to dogs, cats, deer, rodents and bees/wasps

Hi ladies!
Last year was basically the worst year of my life. I lost my well-paying job and had to move back into my parents home. It was not a healthy relationship. I was the most depressed I had ever been and ran away with dog in my car a few times. I decided to check myself into a hospital. The few months after I came back from the hospital I was ok.
I was looking for a job and I got an overnight job and my mom couldn't stand it because I wasn't home to drive her (that is a totally different story) she is paralyzed and can't drive). I was exhausted coming home and would sleep during the day of course and she would call me at 9 requesting things. It just gets worst. We end up in a huge fight because 100 lb me is big and scary. (She has attacked me multiple times).
I have a panic attack and go to the the hospital and refuse all treatment because I am DONE. I am tired of living like this. They take me to the little padded room and I tell them yess I will go to a psych hospital.
It has been six months and things are pretty good. Except my dear heart dog passed on April 5th. I am just working retail and used to working at jobs that are much more interesting. I guess I am asking am I grieving or depressed again? I don't listen to music again. Life is nowhere where I thought I would be.
I mean I don't want kids. Maybe a partner but I don't care. What is my purpose?

We met online with a 1.5 hour commute between us - It was lovebomb at first sight. The first date (june 2023) was magic spending 10 hours at the beach in the water. I had a feeling after just a week of knowing him... facetimes or texts every 3-5 hours, seeing each other every other weekend. It was lovely to have such an incredible connection with someone so quickly and crave them every moment of everyday. I really felt like this was it with the amount of attention/affection he gave me, we would surf and skate together. he said his dream was always to skate with a girl. he told me how important it was to have the same interests as your partner and we also were both into taking film photos and have really special memories captured.
The distance started to take a toll on us 3 months (September) in. It was our first sort of argument he picked about it being almost noon and we hadn't left the house yet to do what we said we would do I was ready and waiting for him to be done playing guitar. But this was all due to him waking up late per usual and his ADHD is so severe he has no idea how quickly time goes by while He will do 4 things at once and then complain about not enough time in the day.
We ended up breaking up because he kept saying "I don't Know" when I Would ask him what he wants. We both crying I packed all my things and then I said why don't we enjoy the day and do what we said we would do and then I'll go home. We ended up enjoying the afternoon and he cried to me about how he can't lose me and how foolish he was to start an argument.
OK fast forward 2 weeks in September we had plans to go camping for the weekend, I booked a dog sitter. the night he was planning to come over he cancels on because there is a rat in his house (he has 3 roommates and the kitchen and pans and cabinets were never cleaned). so I end up taking my oldest dog on the camping trip and leaving the younger one with the sitters. this was my first sign from the universe that things happen for a reason... keep reading.
Then in end of October. My old boy is sick I drive to Mexico for vet care and he offered to come with me both times and then said he had too much work. Mind you, he wakes up at 9am, clocks in from his bed, does his morning routine and doesn't start to work until 11am usually. He will go run errands in the middle of the work day, play guitar and complains about not being a good worker. He even told me a friend called him out for it because he had mentioned it to them a year prior. So he had been knowingly a poor worker for more than the time I have known him. I brushed it off since my dog was #1. 2 weeks later I take the second trip to Mexico which also happened to be the day after I had been put under for a broken finger from a surf accident. he did not come for my surgery to support me and i expressed concern on lifting my 80 lb dog with my finger freshly put back together with a metal plate. yeah he couldn't come he has work. I spend 8 hours in mexico going to 5 hospitals for my sick dog to find answers. while he ended up going to the skatepark after work. I went to stay at his house that night which was nice he setup a bed for me to lay next to my dog on the floor.
the next morning was Friday. I said ok I have to put my baby down this weekend he is so sick. he said ok I am coming over right after work to be with you. that evening he calls me. his friends brother is in town and he is going to go surfing in the morning (saturday) with them and come over right after. I said ok whatever. I was screaming inside.
he comes its fine. sunday I put my dog down. I have the vet come, before hand I had frequencies playing for my baby on spotify and he has the audacity to change it to youtube video to show my cousin a skate clip. I called him out and he dismissed me.
a week after my dog is put down we have another (many not even mentioned because its painful) butting heads episode of him telling me knitting is not faster than crocheting and he has the experience since he was around it when his friends crocheted so i should listen to him. mind you I have been crocheting for 10 years i have never knitted so i mentioned i was going to start knitting and he told me how much slower it is and i just genuinely don't know so i said oh I didn't know and I don't know what to expect and because I didn't say I believe you it was this terrible icky feeling in my gut I didn't even wanna talk to him anymore. I was telling him how excited I Was about something and he would always shoot me down. so I called him later that evening after work to discuss it and of course he is driving to the skatepark and he says he needs to go skate and feels bad energy after me calling him to talk about the knitting crocheting mishap and he goes "your life has been so depressing lately" and I was just so taken back by that and hurt I don't even remember what my response was but I should have hungup and never talked to him again. I don't remember what happened but I let it go.
then a couple weeks later (November) its 2 weeks from Thanksgiving, he says his roommate is making a fried turkey and invites me i am so excited because I am 2,000 miles from my family so I begin to prepare what meals I want to make. a week before Thanksgiving he facetimes me and says he has exciting news that hes going to mexico for thanksgiving to surf with his friends. I was so sad, I asked him why he would make plans in place of what we planned and he just said it was a special opportunity and so I felt i had no choice and didn't fight it. i realize at this point of typing all of this I enabled alot of this behavior.
that evening I sent a video message to him about how hurt I was and how inconsiderate he is of my feelings and the fact that I am his girlfriend and his friends and what he wants to do comes before me always. the next morning he apologizes via text and then is quite throughout the day which is very odd because he texts every 3 hours pretty much. I ask how his day is going and he says it started off shitty because of the message he received from me that morning, it wasn't the "best way to start the day". so again I am dismissed for sharing my feelings. and I let it go again.
Thanksgiving comes and I take my other dog camping to the spot I took my recently passed dog. Fast forward December he was visting at my house and I have been working on training my younger dog he has leash reactivity. I say "here" and treat dog when we pass other dogs so he associates quiet still behavior with a reward in this moment. Ok so then he suggests I teach dog a different word that would associate a dog is coming and that my dog needs to behave............ I said that is exactly why I say "here". He continues and starts to raise his voice, "you aren't listening to me, teach him a different word like leave it" and I said ok but he still isn't good with "here" so why would i give him another word to learn? it turned into an explosive fight. we broke up the next night and he is bawling his eyes out and so am I. a week goes by we get back together because I can't help but think he has potential to be this amazing partner he talks about all these things he wants out of someone and I check every box but he just would pick this random little arguments and then be so indecisive of what he wants to break up or not.
I told him how I wanted to do yoga teacher training he says "theres already a lot of yoga teachers". I told him I was going to costa rica with my girlfriend for a surf trip and he says "why would you go with her and not me? how long have you known her? your level of surfing isn't even at the par to go to costa rica" but he had already gone on 2 surf trips with friends. he would dismiss me time and time again. he would criticize everything I do. even telling him something I saw happen he would qualify everything I said and question what I saw was true.
His birthday comes in January and prior to this I told him how excited I am and important it is to spend brithdays together and shower each other. I make him a cake the night before and set up my dog for daycare. I drive to work keep his cake in the fridge and then after pick up dog from daycare and drive 2 hours to see him and celebrate. He then tells me he booked a trip to skate in Spain with his friends over my birthday. I was so heartbroken I wanted to throw up I asked him if he takes me seriously and he said yes of course and we both cry I am so furious I should have left but I didn't. I then tell him how disgusting his house and its been 8 months and hes never bought me flowers. the next day he brings flowers to the coffee shop I went to work at. I went back to his house after and broke up with him yet again. I burned a picture of him he gave me. I really tried to move on. he hurt me so much and would dismiss me all the time.
I don't know why but we got back together again. he started watching dharma talks I would send him (mindfulness talks, Tara Brach, Jack Kornfield, Ram Dass kind of stuff) because he knew how selfish and self centered he was and he admited it every time we broke up but made no effort and this last break up he really did seem to make an effort.
we didn't see each other for 40 days and he came over in April for a weekend we went to the art museaum he was in the middle of a story and we were getting kicked out I asked him if he can take my picture quick and he flips, "I can never finish a story it takes forever all the time" he takes my picture and then I stop being silent. I tell him you are the storyteller all the time I never tell you stories because its always about your stories I remind him I haven't been to an art museum in ages and i want a photo in that moment and your story already happened so why cant it wait a moment??? he then woke up a little and saw my perspective. and then the next day we went to surf, the surfboards are in the car we go thrifting and he says oh we can't be in there for even 30 minutes someone will steal the boards he had all this concern on the surfboards and I was like why did we come here then...? lets just leave but no we go inside and of course 15 min in he says ok! 15 more min! and then later that night I said why did you make such a big fuss and then you don't even live the truth you say? he says yeah I wanted to come apologize to you but I didn't and I am like are you kidding?! come on please I need you to take accountability for your actions this is part of being an adult!! and then he admits to being a "whiny baby" and I was like yes you are a huge baby and youre a grown ass man! anyways it was a very nice talk while I was actually able to talk and he was listening very well.
Ten days ago was my birthday, I went camping with my dog. He told me he would facetime me on my birthday he only sent a text in the morning from spain mentioning "I wish I could be with you" whatever crock of s*/t. he never called me. I saw his friends posting on IG though so I know they had Wi-Fi. I sent a picture of my camp and said "we made it, thanks for calling like you said you would :(" that was my last text to him.
the next morning he gave every excuse, "sooooo sorry I didn't get to facetime you" we were so busy blah blah blah. its like if you wanted to make the effort you would? sends another text asking how camp was and what are we doing that day and then another one 8 hours later apologizing saying how truly bad he feels and hopes I am willing to speak with him but could understand how I wouldnt want to and says he blew it.
I never responded. He never even tried to call me to apologize just 4 total texts. I blocked him from seeing my IG stories. I am so heartbroken that I spend a year thinking I was with this wonderful person who wants the same things as me to learn that all he wants is to skate and surf and not do any hard work or put any effort into life he has not made any growth the entire almost year I have known him.
I have made so many advancements in my own life. I sold my motorcycle, rented out my garage, laid brick in my yard by myself never offered to help, I starting selling all of my vintage at pop ups I did 3 and he never came to any. I broke my finger and put my dog of 11 years down. I have a really wonderful job and I also stick to my word and do what I Tell people I am going to do.
I can't help but be missing him. Wanting to work it out. I act impulsively quite often but I know in my gut this man would not stand up for me if times got tough like he hasnt this whole year. can people really change? do I owe closure to him?

I have a VERY precious pink velvet vintage couch. It's kind of falling apart but I can't part with it. The most recent tragedy to befall her was my dog ripping up and destroying the seat cushion. The cover was already in bad shape, but now it is unsalvageable, and there is a huge hole in the cushion itself.
I'm on a tight budget, so I want to try to make a new cushion from scratch, but I have no upholstery experience. So far my plan was to order a new custom cushion from Foam Factory, find a complimentary fabric, and somehow turn that fabric into a cover for the cushion. Do you all think this is an appropriate project for a total beginner or should I try to find a professional who can carry this out for me?