My wife, Mia, and I were driving cross-country. It was our first attempt at the “Great American Roadtrip.”
Mia and I rented a small RV; more of a camper than a full blown RV. We packed up a couple suitcases with plenty of room for any souvenirs and we hit the dusty trail.
We started our journey on the “Mother Road”-- Route 66-- driving south from Chicago until we connected to i-70 and shot straight west through Missouri.
The goal was to see those parts of the country we had never seen before, stopping anywhere that seemed interesting. From the plains of Kansas up through the badlands of Wyoming and South Dakota.
In Missouri we saw the world’s largest cap gun. In Kansas we visited the Evel Knievel Museum and the World’s Largest Belt Buckle.
We love all those kitschy, tourist trap places.
Eventually, we made it to Colorado and after a few hours more of driving through amber waves of grain, we saw them... the Rocky Mountains.
We made an exit and headed north through the winding mountain highways.
The Rockies were gorgeous. Snow capped in the middle of summer, some of the peaks pierced through the white fluffy clouds.
We saw a sign that read “Traffic Tunnel - 3 Miles.”
A little further and sure enough, there it was, a large tunnel bored directly through the mountain in front of us.
A large sign read, “Pike Tunnel - Longest Traffic Tunnel in the Nation! - Please turn your headlights on now.”
“How long is it?” asked Mia.
“That’s what she said,” I quipped.
But she was right, there was no information beyond the detail that this was the longest tunnel in the nation.
“Can’t be more than a mile or two,” I said as I watched the little white car ahead of us slip into the darkness. A moment later we joined it.
The tunnel was lit by fluorescents that gave everything a greenish yellow tinge. On the left hand side was a raised walkway behind a railing for maintenance access.
Initially I was struck by the incredible amount of work that went into the construction of this man- made marvel.
“We’re under a million tons of rocky mountain right now,” I said.
“How many years before this caves in?” Mia responded.
I shot her a look--
“Let’s save the cave-in talk until we’re out on the other side.”
“I’m just saying, nature will take this back eventually,” she continued.
I scanned the empty road ahead of us.
“Where did the other car go?” I asked.
We were now alone in the tunnel, no cars ahead of us nor behind us.
“Huh... they must have sped off ahead. Maybe they’re scared of a cave-in?”
My Spotify playlist had stopped playing. Mia looked at the phone.
“No cell service.”
She turned on the radio and spun the dial only to find static.
“You’re not going to be able to pick up a station in here,” I said.
She turned the volume down.
“Just wanted to check... If only we had some CDs. This tunnel really keeps going.”
“I would have thought we’d be through it by now,” I replied.
I looked at the RV’s odometer, 45,600 miles. I picked up speed. I wanted to try and catch up to the little white car.
Up until this point, the tunnel was a straight shot, but now the tunnel started to curve to the right. It may have been my imagination but it also felt as though we were descending…
Mia felt it too and she started to get antsy.
“Where did that other car go? How long is this tunnel?”
There was an urgency in her voice.
I was getting nervous, claustrophobia was not usually a problem for me but when I looked down at the odometer and I saw that it had gone up by 3 miles, my mind began to wander to unsettling places.
We were descending in altitude. I could feel it. I could see a slope in the lights on the ceiling and the railing of the maintenance walkway. I could feel a pressure in my head, and I was getting cold.
“Could you grab me a coke from the back, Mia?”
I couldn’t have Mia getting anxious, that would only start a chain reaction and make me freak out which would then make her freak out.
She unbuckled and ducked into the back of the RV to where we had a cooler stocked with drinks and food.
Just as she stepped into the back, I saw something.
There standing on the side of the road was a MAN wearing a reflective safety vest and a hard hat. He was WAVING to me as I passed him by.
Something about him looked... strange…
I watched him in the side-view mirror as we passed and he was still watching the RV, still waving at the back of our vehicle as he faded into the distance.
Mia reappeared from the back of the RV, Coke in hand. She popped it and handed it to me.
“You look worried.”
“I’m fine,” I smiled and took a sip of the Coke.
“Eric, slow down!”
I slammed on the breaks as I saw what made Mia scream. In the road in front of us was a roadblock.
Two reflective traffic sawhorses blocked both lanes of the tunnel. Beyond the roadblock, the lights of the tunnel were dark. There was nothing but a void of blackness.
Standing in front of the roadblock was another man wearing a reflective vest and a hard hat, only this time his hard hat had a light on top which obscured his face.
We came to a jolting stop.
I turned to Mia
“Are you okay?” I asked.
“I’m fine,” she replied. “It’s a cave-in isn’t it?”
“God, I hope not.”
I rolled down the window, leaned out and yelled to the man in the hard hat.
“Hey! What’s going on?!”
The man was about 5 yards away. He took two steps towards us and then raised a hand to his mouth and yelled.
“Just doing some maintenance!”
“How long is it going to take?!” I yelled back.
The man made a hand gesture as if he didn’t hear me.
“How long is it going to take?!” I called again.
He made the same gesture. I unbuckled my seat belt and grabbed the door release.
“What are you doing?” Mia asked.
“I gotta know what’s going on.”
“Eric, just stay here, it might not be safe.”
“I’ll be just a second,” I said.
I pushed the door open and stepped down from the RV.
“Stay in your vehicle!” the man yelled.
He took a couple steps towards me with his hand out telling me to stop.
“What’s the hold up?!” I shouted.
The man was a bit closer now but I still couldn’t see his face through the shining light on his helmet.
“Please stay in your vehicle!” he shouted.
There was something off about him.
Then I heard it–
“EEEAAAUUUUUUGHHHHHHHH!!!”
A scream, or something, rolled from deep in the tunnel. The worker turned and looked into the darkness. Then he ran past the barricades and soon all we could see of him was the light on his helmet.
The light disappeared a moment later.
“What the hell was that?! Is someone hurt?” Mia asked.
“I have no idea,” I said.
“Should we do something?” Mia asked.
I just sat there and watched the pitch black tunnel in front of me. I had no idea what to tell her. I checked the sideview mirrors. There was still nobody behind us.
“Where are the other cars?” I asked.
“They must have gotten through before the roadblock... Or maybe they caused the roadblock?” Mia replied.
“I saw another worker a little ways back. We could try to go back and talk to him.”
“We’d be going straight into any oncoming cars.”
“There’s a maintenance walkway. We didn’t pass him that long ago. We can probably catch him on foot.”
“Maybe we should just wait for the guy to come back.”
She reached over and grabbed my arm. I squeezed her hand.
She was right.
I looked out at the tunnel ahead of us. I turned on the RV’s high beams but all I could see beyond the roadblock was more tunnel and more road.
I checked my phone. Unsurprisingly, there was no service still.
We waited, but the man never came back.
“It’s been twenty minutes,” Mia said, “How come there hasn’t been another car behind us?
I was having the same thought. I rolled down my window and stuck my head out. I looked back at the road behind us. It went back about 200 yards before curving out of sight.
There was no sign of that first worker I saw on the maintenance walk way. I looked at the roadblock ahead of us and clicked on the RV’s high beams. There was nothing beyond the roadblock but more tunnel. It didn’t look like it was under construction, just very dark.
“I think we should keep going,” I said.
“What about the roadblock?”
“We’ll move those sawhorses out of the way and just drive past,” I said as I opened my door.
Mia looked at me, then she cast her eyes to the dark tunnel ahead of us. I knew she was processing the same limited options that I was.
Driving backwards would be a huge risk in the instance of another car finally coming along.
Getting out and walking would take God knows how long, we could have driven 10 miles at this point.
Forward was our best option.
“Let’s do it,” Mia said.
We jumped out and quickly pulled the two sawhorses out of the right lane. I pulled the RV up past the barriers, then we jumped out again and put the sawhorses back where they were. We didn't need another car to come barreling through.
We were finally moving again, slowly. It was pitch black save for the high beams of the RV.
We crept forward at around 15 miles per hour. As the tunnel turned and twisted, my eyes started to play tricks on me. I kept seeing shapes at the furthest point of the tunnel.
I kept seeing something standing just at the end of the next bend but as we roll forward, there was nothing there.
“Where are the workers?” Mia asked.
“I don’t know.”
I was done rationalizing. This was all wrong. Traffic tunnels are never this long.
My mind started to wander to all the road trip urban legends I’d read about; The Killer in the Backseat, The Disappearing Gas Station, The Pale Man In The Corn Field.
Did we stumble into some strange outlier location? An in-between point on the endless roads that cross this country?
Then I saw it–
“Look! A person! Thank god!” Mia shouted.
As we rounded a curve in the tunnel, a group of maintenance workers entered our view.
The three of them stood on the left side of the road behind two more sawhorses topped with flashing lights.
Two of them faced towards us, the third was facing the other two.
The one with his back to us wore a light on his hard hat. Was this the same guy we saw earlier? How did he get this far away?
I approached slowly and rolled down the window.
“Hey! You left us waiting back there!” I yelled.
There was no response.
In fact, all three men were completely silent, and it was hard to tell in the flashing light of the sawhorses, but they looked to be standing COMPLETELY STILL.
“Hello?!” I yelled again.
I pushed open my door and stepped out onto the pavement.
“Eric wait--”
I held up a finger to Mia.
“Just a second.”
I slowly stepped towards the 3 men.
“Hello?”
No response… What the fuck?
The bright lights of the sawhorses obscured their faces.
I kept moving closer.
“Hey, what’s going on--”
Then I saw it.
Their faces... They were plastic.
In front of me stood three mannequins.
I backed away toward the RV, then I turned and walked hurriedly to the vehicle.
I was seriously freaked out but I didn’t want to alarm Mia. I climbed into the driver’s seat and slammed the door shut.
“They’re mannequins.” I said.
“What?”
“They’re mannequins.”
”Why?... What?...”
“I don’t know…”
I looked back over at the three figures and my blood ran cold…
The Hard Hat Mannequin had somehow TURNED AROUND to face us. All three figures appeared to be watching us now.
Then we heard it--
A loud resonant banging on the side, and then the roof of the RV.
“What the hell was that?” Mia whispered.
We listened, holding our breath. Then--
A shuffling sound--
Something was moving ON or IN the RV.
“Stay here.” I said.
I got up.
“Eric, wait!”
I moved to the back of the RV.
It was dark. I went for a drawer in the kitchenette space and pulled out a flashlight.
I moved to the rear of the RV, the bedroom. My flashlight illuminated an empty room.
“Whoever is back here, I have a gun…”
A shitty bluff. But I didn’t see anything.
I shone the light out of the windows of each side of the RV. Nothing.
Then I heard it–
A shuffling sound, from right above me.
I looked up and screamed–
“Fuck!”
On the roof of the RV, staring through the skylight was a woman with vacuous black eyes and a dead smile.
Her stringy black hair dangled down towards me casting thing black shadows across her horrible pale face.
“Mia, drive! Fast!” I screamed.
Mia JUMPED over to the driver’s seat, shifted into gear and STOMPED on the gas. The RV was clunky but it could move when it needed to.
We lurched forward and I fell back.
I trained my flashlight up onto the skylight again and the woman was gone.
I scrambled to my feet and looked out of the side windows.
Did Mia shake her off? There was no sign of the woman. I moved to the passenger seat, breathing heavily and sweating.
“What happened?” She asked, keeping the RV at a steady 50 mph.
“There was a woman on the roof,” I said flatly.
I realize now that I was in a kind of shock.
“A woman?”
“Her eyes were black.”
Mia just looked at me, then back at the tunnel ahead of us.
“There’s something wrong with this tunnel.” I whispered.
Mia pointed at the road ahead, “Look.”
I looked out at the tunnel. There were more mannequins. A LOT more mannequins. They were positioned on both sides of the road.
They were all facing us and even though I never saw them move, when I looked in the side-view mirror, they were somehow STILL facing us, turning to watch us as we drove past. Watching without eyes.
“Just keep driving.” I said.
As we drove on, the mannequins crowded the sides of the road more and more. There were thousands of them. Eventually they were so close that some of their outstretched arms hit the side of the RV.
They were closing in on us. Squeezing our path forward. One stood in the middle of the road.
“I don’t think i can get around it.”
“Run it over. Don’t stop.”
The RV smashed into the mannequin. Its head shot forward and bounced against the windshield and the vehicle shuddered as it rolled over the body.
Soon there were two in the road. Then three.
I could see where this was going. Pretty soon there would be too many for the RV to ram through, but goddammit we were going to get through as many as we could.
“Speed up, Mia.”
CRASH!
The sound was surreal, smashing into mannequin after mannequin at nearly 60 miles per hour.
Hands, legs, heads and torsos flew.
The windshield cracked, the RV shuddered and screamed and eventually slowed down, despite the screaming engine.
I’m certain the axle was jammed up with lifeless, plastic body parts. Eventually we came to a stop.
“She won’t move,” Mia said.
She pressed on the gas but it was no use, the RV just rocked a little bit.
“Try reverse.”
She shifted and pressed on the gas, we got some decent movement before running into another jam.
“Fuck.”
“Should we get out and look?” Mia asked.
“I’ll go,” I said as I grabbed the flashlight and popped the passenger door. Mia unbuckled her seatbelt.
“We’ll go together.”
We stumbled out of the RV on the passenger side. It was like stepping into Hell.
Countless, lifeless faces stared out at us from the darkness. The only light came from the headlights of the RV and my flashlight.
We clumsily made our way along the side of the RV. The ground was littered with mannequin pieces.
I thought to myself, if we could get a couple yards cleared out behind the rear tires, we might be able to back out and get enough momentum to reverse all the way back out of here.
Instead, when we got to the back of the RV, my stomach flipped and my heart sank.
I was expecting to see a trail of flattened mannequins, instead the RV was now surrounded by thousands of perfectly intact mannequins standing at attention. As if their ranks had some how been replenished after our vehicular assault.
“This is impossible.”
She started to cry. I held her close.
“We’ll keep moving.” I said.
“It will never end. The tunnel makes no sense. It only curves one direction.”
I looked at her.
“What do you mean?”
“This whole time the tunnel has only been curving to the right. it would sometimes straighten out or go left for a few yards but before too long we were curving to the right again. We’ve either been driving in circles or spiraling downwards.”
“So we’ll go back the way we came and hope we’re not going in circles.” I said.
We had been driving for hours at this point. Walking back out the way we came would take days. But now that I thought about it, Mia was right, we’d only been curving to the right.
This tunnel seemed to be very gradually taking us downwards into the earth.
Going forward would not get us any closer to escape.
“We’ll need food from the RV,” Mia said.
I nodded and we stumbled our way back to the front of the RV, the mannequins’ lifeless faces watching us the whole time.
I stepped up to the passenger door and nearly fell back when I looked through the window.
“What the fuck?” I breathed.
What I saw were two mannequins sitting in the driver’s and passenger’s seat.
How they got in there? I have no idea, but what really made my blood run cold was that they were dressed EXACTLY like MIA and I.
They wore identical sets of clothes. The one in the passenger seat had my same New Order T-shirt and black jeans. The one in the driver’s seat had Mia’s green striped sweater and denim shorts.
Their plastic faces stared out through the shattered windshield at the endless crowd of mannequins staring back at them.
Mia stepped up and saw the uncanny display.
“What the fuck?” Mia echoed.
I pulled myself up into the RV and slowly stepped around my mannequin doppelgänger. I avoided looking into its face but I swear i could feel it watching me as I stumbled around it.
Mia followed and we made our way into the back of our dark RV. Luckily we had just stocked our cooler full of deli meat and water not long after crossing the Colorado state line.
I handed Mia the flashlight and pulled open the cooler. I filled a backpack full of food and water.
I turned and saw them–
My mannequin double had somehow moved. It was standing in the aisle watching us.
Mia’s doppelgänger was still seated in the driver’s seat but had turned to peer back at us with its eyeless gaze.
Mia saw the look in my eyes and turned. She screamed when she saw them and backed into me. I put my arm around her and we stood there a moment, letting our skyrocketing heart rates return to Earth.
“Let’s get out of here,” I said.
I slid the backpack onto my shoulders.
Mia joined me at the door. I looked into her eyes. “Are you ready?” She nodded. I kissed her.
“I love you,” I said.
“I love you,” she said.
The look on her face killed me. She was terrified. I’m sure the look on my face was similar.
I opened the door and we stepped out…
We again stumbled to the back of the RV. Once we were clear of the RV and all the crushed mannequin body parts, it became easier to find footing, though weaving through an endless crowd of lifeless people was a slow process.
It was pitch black. Without the flashlight we wouldn’t be able to see a foot in front of us.
As I walked, the beam of light created the illusion of movement in the crowd. At least I hoped it was an illusion.
The limbs of the mannequins seemed to stretch and turn, but the only sound was that of Mia and I shuffling our way through the crowded tunnel.
Things went on like this for what felt like hours. Mia and I were sweating and aching. I was about to suggest we stop and rest, but then I saw it and I froze…
Out in the crowd, beyond rows of blank faces I saw a pale face, black hair and a dead smile.
I saw two vacuous eyes staring right at me.
“Mia, do you see her?” I whispered.
“See who?”
I slowly raised my arm and pointed.
It was the woman, or whatever it was, that stared back at me through the skylight on the roof of the RV.
“Oh my god!” Mia squeaked.
I could see now that the Pale Faced Woman was tall. A few inches taller than the mannequins.
As I pointed, she stared back at me with that terrible grin.
“What do we do?” Mia whispered.
I raised the flashlight and pointed it right at the Pale Faced Woman. I thought maybe this would scare her off.
I was wrong.
The light only made her appear more unsettling as she stared back, unflinchingly.
“What do you want?!” I yelled.
She only stared back at me. She was as still as the mannequins.
“We have to keep going.” I whispered.
Mia didn’t respond. Her body was tense as she held onto me.
“We’ve come this far, we can’t turn back again,” I continued.
I pulled Mia’s hand and we continued on our way through the mannequins, keeping the distance between us and her as wide as possible.
As we moved past, she kept watching us. Though her movements were imperceptible to us, her eyes never left us. Like one of those portraits whose eyes appear to watch you no matter where you stand.
Finally, we got far enough that she was out of sight. But the thought of her being somewhere behind us only unsettled me further and I quickened our pace.
As the hours wore on, there was no sign of the Pale Faced Woman and the crowd of mannequins began to thin out. They still populated the tunnel from one end to the other, but there was more space between them, allowing Mia and I to walk more freely.
The mannequins on the maintenance walkway on the side of the tunnel seemed to thin out as well and I decided it would give us a better vantage if we were walking up there.
I helped Mia climb up the railing that bordered the walkway, then I climbed up behind her. The walkway was elevated 3 or 4 feet above the roadway. We could easily see over the heads of the mannequins in both directions.
There was, of course, no end to the tunnel in sight.
We kept walking.
The mannequins continued to thin out, but they were different now.
There were mannequins dressed as maintenance workers again, but also mannequins dressed as families and businessmen. There was even a group of mannequin nuns standing in a single file line, heads bowed in prayer.
Needless to say, we passed none of this on the way in to the tunnel. I was feeling very hopeless that we were going to be able to find our way out.
I was far beyond speculating how this was at all possible. It’s NOT possible. And even if it were, there is no good reason for someone to do this to us.
The only explanation was the supernatural. Then I saw Her. Rather, I saw THEM.
Arranged in the middle of the tunnel was a circle of mannequins with long black hair and tattered cloth.
They looked exactly like the Pale Faced Woman, minus any facial features. I kept a close watch on them as we passed to make sure they didn’t start following us.
“A door!” Mia shouted.
Mia pointed a few paces ahead of her. There was a door leading into the wall of the tunnel.
We ran towards it. Mia grabbed the handle, turned it and pulled. It was heavy and Mia had to brace her foot on the wall to get it moving.
The metal door groaned as if it hadn’t been opened in years.
Finally, it was open enough to see past.
It was a hallway. It went out about 5 yards then turned right at a 90 degree angle.
The strangest part was the design of the hallway.
It wasn’t cement or pavement like the tunnel.
The walls were wood paneled and the floor was covered in a thick carpet, like a house from the 1970s.
“I say we see where this takes us.” Mia said.
There was no reason to disagree, but I wasn’t going to get us trapped in there.
I opened up my backpack and took out a water bottle. I opened it and handed it to Mia. She drank half, then I drank the other half.
I slowly closed the door, shoving the empty water bottle in the crack to keep it from closing all the way.
I turned to Mia-- “Okay, let’s go.”
We slowly made our way down the quiet hallway. We got down to where the hallway cornered to the right and that’s when we heard it–
KA-CHUNK!!!--
I whipped around. The door had closed behind us. I ran back to it and tried to push it open, but it was no use. There was no way it closed on its own.
Someone had to have removed the water bottle. Our path had been chosen for us.
There was no turning back.
We continued down the hallway. We turned right. The hallway continued, then turned right again. That should have led us right back to the tunnel. But it didn’t. This part of the hallway went on far longer than was possible without running into the tunnel. Then it turned right again.
It went on like this. Sometimes a section of the hallway was 20 feet long, sometimes it was 20 yards long, sometimes it was 3 feet long. But it always turned to the right.
At first it was a relief to be somewhere other than the cold, dark tunnel. But the hallway very quickly became claustrophobic and before too long, I heard someone walking behind us.
We had stopped to take a break and I heard a third pair of footsteps on the carpet coming from behind us. I backtracked to the last corner.
I was terrified as I slowly peeked around the corner, tense and waiting to see the vacuous eyes and inky black hair of the Pale Faced Woman... but there was nothing there. I wasn’t about to backtrack any further.
“There was no one there.” I whispered.
Mia slumped against the wall and slid down to the carpet.
“I think I need to rest.” She said.
I put my backpack down on the ground for Mia to use as a pillow. She laid her head down and was passed out in seconds.
I had no idea how long we had been walking at this point. I stood leaning against the wall. My body was telling me to rest but I couldn’t risk falling asleep. I had to keep watch. I knew SHE was following us.
I took in the details of the hallway for the first time. The carpet was a dull brown and the walls a cheap wood paneling. The hanging lighting fixtures were shaded by stained glass, something you might see in an old diner.
Who built this place? Did someone pick out the carpet and the lighting fixtures? Did a team of workers blast these tunnels into the Earth? Or has this place always existed? Was this Purgatory?
I began to feel dizzy. I was panicking. My heart felt like it was trying to escape my chest. I slumped to the floor and tried to slow my breathing.
I closed my eyes... –
I SHOT up in a panic. I had fallen asleep while I was meant to be keeping watch.
I snapped to my feet and looked around.
Mia was still asleep on my backpack.
Then I noticed that the hallway had changed. A few paces away there was now a plain wooden door in the wall.
I slowly approached it. I put my ear to the door and I could hear what sounded like TV static and the low murmur of voices.
I discreetly grabbed the door handle and turned it slowly. I felt the latch bolt clear and I carefully cracked the door just enough to peek inside.
It was dark, so it took a second for me to register what I was seeing. I saw a small board room. A long table in the center was surrounded by seated men in suits.
At the end of the table stood another man next to an old CRT TV that was playing static. This was the only source of light in the room and all the men around the table were turned towards the tv.
Suddenly the screen flickered from static to a solid dark background. And some warped new age style muzak began playing.
Then the words appeared on the screen that terrified me like nothing else before. In plain text the words read–
“YOU WILL LOSE HER.”
I froze as I knew these words were meant for me I watched with terror as the men seated around the table slowly turned toward me in unison.
They were mannequins.
The TV screen then clicked off and they continued staring at me as I could barely make out their forms through the near pitch darkness.
I quickly pulled the door shut. And whipped around to look at Mia, I had a horrible feeling of dread that when I turned around she would be gone, like the message on the TV promised–
“Eric? What are you doing?” Mia was leaning up and staring at me.
Thank God. There was Mia, right where I left her.
I pointed at the door and said, “This door appeared and I--”
“What door?” she interrupted.
I turned and sure enough, the door was now gone.
I explained what happened to her, but I left out the message that appeared on the screen.
-- YOU WILL LOSE HER –
Those words still burned in my brain. I tried to force them out.
We drank water, ate granola and then got moving again.
Hallways. Endless hallways.
After a couple hours of walking we started to hear music. There were small speakers in the corners of the ceiling.
I recognized it as the same new-age muzak that played on the TV in the board room. The melody drilled into our minds. Combined with the dull aesthetics of the quiet hallways and the endless right turns, the music had a hypnotizing effect.
The lengths of the halls became more uniform. That is to say, the straight section of hallway was about 7 paces, then a right turn, then 7 paces and a right turn.
“I think we’re walking in circles... or a square,” Mia said.
I looked at her and took out a bottle of water. I peeled off the plastic label and dropped it on the floor.
Then we kept walking.
7 paces, right turn. 7 paces, right turn. 7 paces, right turn. And there it was... Mia was right.
The label from my water bottle lay in the middle of the hallway. Somehow we had been led into a loop. I lost it.
“FUUUCK!”
I kicked the wall repeatedly and screamed. Mia just leaned her back against the wall.
This was our dynamic. If one of us lost it, the other became zen and thought of a solution. More often than not, I was the one to lose it.
I finally stopped freaking out
“There has to be a way out. A door,” Mia said.
“We would have seen it,” I replied.
“A hidden door,” she said.
She turned around and ran her hands along the cracks of the wood paneling.
“Most likely on the outer wall,” she said.
She beat her fist on the wall, listening for a change in the sound. I exhaled heavily, sweating and tired, and I started searching the wall as well.
We checked the whole first wall, nothing. We checked the second wall, nothing. The third, nothing.
The final wall... Nothing. I gave up and slumped on the floor. Mia immediately went over to the other side of the hall and started checking the inner wall.
“What are you doing? I thought you said it would be on the outer wall?” I asked.
Then we heard it.
Mia beat the wall and instead of the dead thud, we heard a resonate BOOM –
A door…
I shot up and started tapping the wall with Mia until we found where the door ended. It was the width of about 4 wooden panels. I lined myself up in the center, lowered my shoulder and pushed–
IT MOVED! It barely moved but it was enough to confirm this actually was a door! I re-centered and tried again, lowering my center of gravity, I pushed as hard as I could. The door pushed inward about 3 inches, then Mia joined in. We slowly moved the door, 5 inches, then 10, then 15, then 20.
Then Mia slipped inside.
I had a moment of panic as she disappeared into the darkness and those haunting words came back into my mind, “YOU WILL LOSE HER.”
I darted past the doorway, falling through the threshold and hitting the concrete floor.
I looked up and there was Mia, thank God. I promised myself I’d never let her out of my sight again.
“The exit...” Mia said.
She looked and sounded as if she were a thousand miles away. I got to my feet and followed her gaze. What I saw nearly brought me to tears.
We were back in the tunnel, but there was light. About a mile down was the mouth of the tunnel, and daylight pouring in. Beautiful daylight. I grabbed Mia tight and kissed her.
“Thank God...” she cried.
We started moving. Nothing was going to slow us down this time. We sped up into a RUN down the maintenance walkway towards that beautiful sunlight.
As we approached, something else came into view. Parked in the middle of the roadway was a large vehicle…
It couldn’t be…
It was!
Our RV sat in the road waiting for us. We ran all the way to it, pulled open the passenger side door and climbed in. There were no mannequins to be seen.
I fell into the driver’s seat and Mia handed me the keys. I turned over the engine, the most beautiful sound I’d ever heard. I shifted into gear and floored it towards the sunlight.
As we got closer, I could see the green of trees and the blue of the sky. We were maybe one hundred yards away.
I turned to Mia, tears in my eyes…
And what I saw turned my blood to ice.
Just beyond Mia’s window, that horrifying pale face grinned at me.
The Pale Faced Woman was somehow floating outside of the RV.
Before I could say anything, her hand smashed through the window and gripped Mia by the throat, then in one horrible motion the thing PULLED MIA SCREAMING THROUGH THE WINDOW AND…
Disappeared…
I SLAMMED on the breaks just as the RV passed through the exit of the tunnel and sunlight flooded the cab of the RV. I threw it in park and shot out of the door screaming.
“Mia!? Mia??!!”
I screamed over and over. I rounded the front of the RV and looked back at the tunnel –
-- and what I saw shattered my mind…
The tunnel was gone.
There was only open road.
I had lost her.

Here's my notes throughout the Google Marketing Live. Some stuff may be omitted and I phrased everything how they would have in the presentation (overly positive).

Google Marketing Live 2024

~Philipp Schindler – Introduction~
New era of AI
-A few years ago the conversation was: What is AI?
-Now the question is: What can AI do for me and how can I implement it as fast as possible?

15% of searches are new on Google every day
-This number has held steady for more than a decade
“The perfect search engine should understand exactly what you mean and give you back exactly what you need.”

AI Overviews

• People who use AI Overviews use search more
• Higher quality clicks/more time on site
• Rolling out to US

Trend 1 – The “Exactly-What-I-Want” search
The volume of searches with 5 or more words grew 1.5x as fast

• Instead of “men’s running shoes”
• “how to pick the right running shoes for a runner beginner with high arches”

Trend 2 – Complex Search Made Easy
“What are good options for aa day out in dallas for kids? What are some options with ice cream shops nearby?”

Trend 3 – Search Beyond Words

• Search for things that are difficult to describe.
• 12 billion visual searches a month using lens
• 1 in 4 visual searches has commercial intent
• You will soon be able to search with visual

Circle to Search
Search anything on your screen with just a circle, highlight, or tap.

Trend 4 – Beyond Answers
Some people are not looking for answer, they are looking to explore, or be inspired.

• “Outfit Ideas”
• “Best Places to Eat with Kids”
• “Rainy Day Activities”

Rather than just getting a simple AI response, they will be getting a catered ai page specifically created for their request.

Small YouTube Blurb

• YouTube #1 most watched streaming platform
• 1B hours of YouTube on CTV daily
• Generative AI is the next playground for YouTube creators

Gen AI x Creativity

• Suite of tools for content creators

~Vidhya Srinivasan~
People have limitless options to browse across devices

• 2 out of 3 consumers say making purchase decisions requires more effort than ever
• Have to be on every surface consumers touch
  • Grab their attention
  • Show them you are their solution
• Google is supposed to be the matchmaker for consumers and businesses
• Showing the perfect ad on every surface is difficult

“This is where Gen AI will unlock enormous opportunities”

• Last year they were just getting started with images
• They’re applying the latest Gemini models to teach their other models
  • EX: teaching their algorithm about queries that have never been seen before
• Gen AI is still early-stage tech so they won’t get everything right
• Will become more powerful and helpful as they learn about your business

AI will influence the entire marketing cycle

• Creative
  • Building creative will only take days/hours
  • AI will draw on hero assets and create variations
  • Every ad will be a better match for each consumer’s intent in the moment
• Media
  • No trade-offs between precise targeting and growth
• Measurement
  • Real-time adjustments based on campaign results

"AI doesn’t have taste, it doesn’t have ingenuity, creativity, and strategic insights"

Google Search – Generative AI

• Search in new ways
  • More complex questions
  • Searching with images
• AI overviews will appear in search results when they are particularly helpful beyond SERPs
  • They will be stay focused on sending valuable traffic to publishers and creative
• More choice leads to more opportunity for advertisers
• The will be testing search and shopping ads being integrated into AI overviews
  • Not just above or below
• Match the ads, not just to query context, but also with the information within the AI overview
  • Example: “How do I get wrinkles out of my clothes without an iron”
    • AI overview gives tips
    • Within the AI generated blurb, a wrinkle free spray sponsored ad appears

~Sylvanus Bent~
AI Applications in Search Ads

• Ads in Visual Search
  • EX: You see a piece of luggage at the airport you love, but you don’t know how to describe it or what brand it is. Use visual lens to search for it, then sponsored product ads will show up within the results
• Every search ad is more than an offer, it’s an experience
• Exploring AI ads with recommendations across different verticles
  • EX: Search for “short term storage” – ad shows up, but now you can click into a new dynamic ad experience, where you can customize your needs.
• Takes the definition of a helpful ad to the next level

Conversational Experience in Google Ads

• Can give your URL to Google Ads to generate relevant assets
  • Helpful for smaller businesses

Power Pair

• Combination of Search and Performance Max campaigns
• Delivers the strongest ROI

Profit Optimization

• Making it a new goal in PMAX and shopping campaigns
• Maximize profit by optimizing bidding for gross profit on products

~Tim Frank – Asset Generation~
Advertisers who improve their PMAX ad strength to Excellent see 6% more conversions on average.

Creative Controls & Customization

• Brand Colors
• Brand Fonts – only closely matched
• Upload reference images for AI to generate based on

Additional Reporting & Controls

• Placement reporting and exclusions for YouTube
• Asset Level Reporting
  • Asset reporting for each creative asset

~Nicky Rettke – YouTube~
AI-Powered Video Campaigns

• Video Reach drive awareness
• Video View drive consideration
• Introduced Demand Gen
  • Reaches over 3 billion monthly users
  • Demand Gen will roll out to Display and Video 360 and Search Ads 360
  • Audience list threshold lowered to 100 users for Demand Gen lookalike audiences
• Over 40% increase in view through rate when utilizing vertical video
• Viewers can swipe left on shorts ads to go directly to a landing page
• Introducing animated image ads
  • Pulls images from your product feed and animates them in on unite
• Demand Gen with Product feeds
  • 33% more conversions at a similar CPA
• Shop while you watch

~Matt Madrigal – Shopping~
Product Studio

• Create custom scenes
• Change backdrops
• 2 new features
  • Create visuals that match brand style w/ reference image
  • Image to video
• Brand profile on search
  • To be rolled out in the coming months

Shopping Ads

• Will start highlighting key attributes and stuff from reviews
• 3D shopping ad formats
• Immersive Ad Experiences
• Virtual Try-On
• Video Highlights
  • Rolling out for beauty brands first

~Gaurav Bhaya – The Data Guy~
Good AI requires good data

• First party data delivers better results and helps protect your campaigns against privacy changes
• Collect, protect, and use your data.
• Google Ads Data Manager is now available to everyone
• Simplifies putting first-party management all in one place
• Have an active pipeline from all data sources to one place
• Measurement diagnostics is being introduced to Google Ads
  • Check Engine Light for your site
• Google’s goal is for us to not have to worry about first-party data

Measurement

• Generated Insights and Reports
• Generate a report with a prompt.
• Generated insights

Marketing Mix Models
Meridian is Google’s Open Source MMM and will be available later this year.
tl;dr - very tasty nothing burger.

I’m 26 years old, and I live in Colorado. Last year in January I was found at fault for a collision. Somebody was driving dangerously and I swerved to avoid them, lost control of the vehicle, and hit the back end of a pickup truck. We exchanged information, my vehicle was a lot more damaged, we both drove away after making a few phone calls.
I was going about 35-40 mph so around the speed limit. I hit the brakes before we collided but it wasn’t enough. His rear tail light, quarter panel, and possibly his bumper were damaged. It was a company truck and he was very nice about it, I think he works in commercial construction.
Now yesterday I get a court document handed to me at my front door letting me know I am to appear at court for mediation, they are asking a judgement of 7500 dollars, the maximum allowed by small claims court. Apparently, my insurance gave them an amount that was (according to them) 1200 dollars short of the repair cost. Additionally, the vehicle was in the repair shop for 5 months while they fixed it, which resulted in a loss of use amounting to (according to them) 7500.
I’m wondering what I should do and what is a likely outcome. I feel like their problem is with Geico. My liability covers 15,000 dollars. That should be enough to fix a fender bender. I have no say in what my insurance pays out, I have no sway with them. Also, I don’t govern repair times, shop choice, or parts availability. I’m studying to be a mechanic, I know what this stuff costs and how long it takes. Saying they need me to pay out of pocket for something that took too long due to someone else’s inconsideration is frankly ridiculous.
I have no money. I am a student and a new parent, my baby is 8 months old. I can barely afford groceries, my family helps me put gas in my car and feed me. I have almost no money in my checking, no savings, and my credit card is maxed out. I am waiting to start a part time apprenticeship in the fall and right now I work <20 hours per week driving Uber. I go to community college which is paid for by financial aid and student loans. I made 24,000 dollars last year. I have never possessed more than 1500 dollars at once in my life. Even if I paid 50/month (way more than I can afford) it would take over 10 years to pay off. 50 dollars is nothing to sneeze at. That is 3 meals, a day the zoo, or a pair of shoes for my daughter. I’m worried they’re gonna take that away from me. I grew up poor and I’m worried I’m gonna be burdened with this for so long. I’m also worried about missing school and finding childcare for my daughter while I attend court, plus the filing fees and personal costs.
I’m just curious what my next steps should be and if it’s likely I will have to pay this judgement or what. Just not really sure how this process goes. Thanks in advance

At the time of this post 145 thousand people are still without power going on almost 6 days without power. Tornado wiped out our power grid in select areas throughout Texas (I believe the number was about 800 thousand people got hit without power). Here's some things I learned and a situation report of my experience living with a very large family of mixed ages.
Context: We had been getting hit with some pretty gnarly weather however business as usual in Texas. I didn't think much of it usually when our grids down they're pretty quick to respond minus the snow storm years back. So when I heard there was a storm brewing I didn't even flinch I always keep some very very basics, battery's, lights, water, 2 weeks minimum of non perishable foods, self defense protection, and ammo, etc. But I hardly consider myself a prepper anymore, but I know some people don't even have that.
I use to be really on top of my preps overtime, however my stockpile had dwindled, as did my thirst for knowledge and hands on experience/training. I just honestly wasn't on top of my game anymore, and quit taking this as serious years ago. This tornado really brought me back to reality, so this post is mostly for entry level preppers looking at some practical advice from a 5 day experience, I fully regret the fact I quit taking this serious years ago.
First Day: Around 6pm, emergency alert on phone stating tornado in your area, seek shelter immediately. Thought ok let's shelter in the master bedroom closet. Wind rocked the house pretty good, could hear limbs from tree's falling, within about 10 minutes the power shuts off, and glancing outside within a hour the streets flooded. The storm had died down, as did the flooding, and it was time to asses the damage in the immediate area. Got in the car, power had blown out pretty much every store/house within a several mile zone. Found one square zone with a few places that had power, got some fast food but waited about 30 minutes because everyone went there.
What I wish I had on day one/ and general notes:
Rain boots: The streets had not only flooded but was blocked by limbs in the roadway. Luckily our flooding wasn't too severe but had it been I wish I did have rainboots so normal shoes didn't get soaked, or some type of beach sandals, etc.
Chainsaw, electric saw, axes, regular saw: Would of come in handy if the limbs in our area blocking the road were any bigger.
Higher up vehicles: Some vehicles couldn't make it through the flood due to being so low to the ground, so take into account your vehicles.
More variety of quality flashlights: Electric Lanterns came in clutch, but wish I had more handhelds, head mounted, and higher end lanterns.
Battery Inventory checks: Wish I had not only more batteries cause you really do burn through these quick, but wish I had checked all my lights battery condition, and stored new batteries in waterproof containers.
Alternative sources to battery's: Not a huge fan of candles due to fire risk, but some not scented beeswax or soy based candles would of came in handy to help ration battery supply. Maybe glass lanterns as well for safety and ease of transport. Glowsticks would of been great option too.
Car chargers: Believe it or not some of us didn't have car chargers for our cell phones cause we mostly charge our phones at home, although we were able to share, wish we had this on day one for all our phones.
Fully charged portable battery bank, or portable phone chargers: If we had this we wouldn't of been out in our cars late at night charging stuff putting us at more risk for being possible victims to crime.
Quality of cell phone, and cellphone provider: Have a POS phone but keep putting off upgrading it? Don't. Luckily mine was good but some of our cellphone providers carriers had better signal then others, some of are phones were in bad shape and it was noted we wish we didn't put off upgrading it sooner. You can't predict how well your provider will do but maybe do your research, unsure how this works but now I can do my research and learn from it. I had 0 issues with boost mobile but other family members weren't so lucky.
Cash: This is obvious but due to us moving towards a cashless society its pretty uncommon, but this would of came in handy due to how many places didn't have power. You can do so much with cash.
Battery powered or rechargeable camping fans: I did have one of these, it even had a light but wish I had more.
Larger ice chest: Now we had a few, but they were smaller. We lost everything in our fridge/freezer besides canned drinks, I mean everything. We had just bought grocery's too, lesson learned.
OTC sleeping medication: We had melatonin, and Tylenol pm, but it was so quiet you could hear a mouse sneeze a block over, until the generators turned on. First two are OK options but given its only going to be cool at night, and we knew tomorrow would be hot, we took kratom to sleep. Check your area some states it's illegal, not recommending it but it's what we used. I wish I had stockpiled more kratom, I took it when I got the flu on top of C word to relieve body aches and found out it really helped me sleep and ease pain/stress. Usually cycle this 3 days on max, one day off to prevent habit forming.
(This is really for day two + but ill post this here cause I noticed it on day one)
Backup supply of my personal vices or quitting personal vices: I know this may sound stupid but I am fully addicted to caffeine, and nicotine. I picked my poison and know what I signed up for. Caffeine really? yeah really not sure if you know this but for some people caffeine withdrawal can make you really suffer, and I mean really suffer check out decaf. I was in the process of lowering my caff intake to 1 cup of tea a day, and quit soda. Was one month off soda before the storm came in, but had to relapse due to us not carrying high caff tea on supply.
But yeah stock up on your vices so you aren't going through withdrawals during an emergency. Was on 3mg per ml of nicotine and had to dish out 30$ for a disposable vape thats 50mg per ml at a gas station on day two to prevent withdrawals. So I was on way higher dose of nic then usual due to only being able to purchase what I could find, for reference 50mg per ml if you use that in 10 days thats about a pack of ciggs worth of nic per day. So yeah either quit your vice or stock up, I don't advocate hard drugs at all so this isn't for that but this is mainly aimed at coffee/caff use, etc. Instant coffee packs may be great for some people.
Battery powered radio: Can't stress enough how mentally taxing silence can be long term. We had one, but the battery port crapped out. Lesson learned, test your preps.
Backup food for your pet friends: Luckily I was pretty good on pet food but imagine if I wasn't, and this was more severe.
Water situation: Had a decent amount of drinking water, we had running water. If we didn't I would say I wish I had filled up the giant jugs I bought for flushing the toilet/doing dishes or running through a berkey water filter if we ran out of drinking water. I had bought 5 gallon blue jugs specifically for this years back. However I cleaned them out, and didn't refill, Lesson learned.
2nd Day: We were able to cook some stuff on a gas stove, luckily. People at gas stations were stocking up on ice, filling their gas cans up for their generators, and shelves were getting empty at stores with power only on some things though wasn't too bad cause the power outage was scattered some had power, others didn't. Mostly a waiting game at this point, most of the preps I wish I had on this day were the same as day one, but ill toss in some stuff I wish I had. Obtained a portable battery powered radio, the morale boost was real for everyone, even the dogs.
What I wish I had on day two/ and general notes:
BBQ style lighters to light gas stove: We had two but recently tossed em out due to being empty. Realized I had no bics, and only had one box of matches, feels bad man.
Entertainment: Board games like checkers, board games for kids, chess, basic poker set, etc. These would of been awesome and a great way to keep the kids entertained and the adults, the boredom was real. We hit local goodwill's that had power to look for radios, and cheap prep supplies and games, but no luck.
Third day: By then reality set in for most people, neighbors who could afford to do so booked hotels or bugged out to places with power. The generators really started up by day three, everyone was buying gas for them and you could hear them in almost every direction. Pretty sure some people had it from the start but noticed them more by day three. A lot of people were sitting outside the front of their homes trying to escape the heat. Ice from most places were completely sold out, so you had to really shop around to find any.
Finding news about the power outage day 1-3 was kind of hit and miss, KHOU news updates were pretty short and it took us some time to know how severe the storms damage actually was, cause we were focused on trying to get stuff done around the house and conserving battery. I believe at one point CenterPoint's actual website went down. Mostly resulted to local news channels, and nextdoor app. We couldn't watch live news and had to rely on when KHOU posted youtube videos.
Private security company's hired guards and they started patrolling certain stores that could afford the security, obviously to deter looters. Traffic everywhere was insane in every which direction during peak hours more then usual, PD presence was pretty high, more then usual.
What I wish I had on day three/ and general notes:
Generator: Pretty obvious why, had no experience with them but wish I did, and wish I bought one pre-blackout when I was more into prepping and took time to learn about them and how to use and maintain them properly.
Ham radio: Or something to pick up on local freqs to monitor radio comms for information regarding the storm and local activity if any. I think this may of been better then waiting on local news to post videos.
Day Four: Buddy had power so he dropped off his generator and gave me quick instructions on how to run it, how far away to place them, etc. By day four the temps really ramped up, and this thing definitely kept us cool. When you think of bartering you think of some post apocalypse stuff, but no. In reality you can barter during any emergency, buddy dropped it off free of charge but was able to offer some booze as a thank you. So even if you don't drink stock up on booze/ciggs to barter, never know what you might trade it for. Times are tough in this economy and I honestly didn't have much money to spare, family had to pool our funds together to get last minute preps to survive this, cause we didn't know how long this would really last. In certain areas they said it could be weeks. However the alcohol was a small thank you that I could afford and he was happy so all worked out.
Gas cans were sold out, and extension cord supply's were looking extremely low at local hardware store. From what I overheard they also completely sold out of generators. Honestly wish I knew more about electrical stuff but my buddy gave me a small crash course in wiring everything. You can't just plug it in and pray for the best. Bought the best gauge extensions cords I could afford for our needs, and the distance and hooked it up.
We ran one bedroom AC unit, fans for the dogs, wired a light, and a charging station. Also don't cheap out on gas cans it's not worth blowing your face off or starting a fire, or having it leak. If you get a generator do your research on how to properly run it, and safely fill it. Crime in this area can be fairly high we've had a few drive by shootings and other not so good police involved things. Read this book along time ago about post collapse security, so I blacked out our windows so when we turned lights on no one knew we had power. You may hear the generator, but from the street we look like we don't have anything going for us. My biggest fear was looters from people who were less fortunate or really down bad. We near a common site for homeless people as well so they foot traffic the area.
Generators are very loud, between that and listening to the radio 12 hours a day, I was beginning to audio hallucinate lyrics that weren't there with the radio off, and suffered from heat exhaustion. That and the fact we had homeless in our area and tweekers who might loot I was running off adrenaline a bit. 24 hours almost that night without sleep, and didn't even feel tired. Slept near my firearm until my family woke up at daylight and when daylight hit I knew we were in the clear and I passed out.
What I wish I had on day fou and general notes:
Knowledge of generators.
Knowledge about electricity/wiring them safely.
Security: Some type of physical alarm bell to put on the door like metal door knob alarm bells so it jingles if anyone enters to alert the dogs, had to keep the door slightly cracked so the wires hooked up to the generator would fit. So we couldn't lock the door, which is probably where my anxiety of tweekers coming in came from.
Day Five: Same shit different day, power came on that evening.
Conclusion: Just cause it doesn't look like societal collapse or WW3 prep your shit for emergency's native to your area or go beyond, idc but prep. They ain't coming to help for awhile, or at all if it's very severe...so it's up to you and your community to pull through. This was a wake up call, thanks for coming to my prep talk.

On a rainy Saturday afternoon not so long ago when internet connection was fluctuating in most homes, the 80-year-old Cecile Guidote-Alvarez, widow of the late Senator Heherson Alvarez, carrying a mini iPad, hurriedly alighted from a three-wheeled pedicab Toktok and stormed her way into a popular coffee shop in a mall in Manila.

A senior citizen in panic mode, she told the stunned baristas she’s looking for a Wi-Fi connection because she was about to interview retired Supreme Court Associate Justice Antonio Carpio via Zoom.
The coffee shop, a known world brand, has Wi-Fi exclusive to its employees, so the old lady was told to try other establishments. She went from one coffee shop to another only to be told the same, until a kind stranger led her to a well-known beauty salon with a free internet connection.
The lady salon attendant was very accommodating to the octogenarian, even typing the password on her IPad. Of course, she needed to avail herself of their salon services. Initially, she opted for a haircut, but since she needed to talk and hear clearly who she was talking to, she settled for a foot spa with pedicure.
“They lowered the volume of the piped-in music, and since there were less customers because it’s been raining all day, I was able to do my interview,” Guidote-Alvarez said.
For the next half-an-hour, the hair dressers and manicurists working with their scissors, nail clippers and cuticle removers on their customers’ hair and fingernails, listened to Carpio and Guidote-Alvarez discussed how Filipino fishermen and the Philippine Navy ships helplessly negotiate their ways in Scarborough Shoal amid the territorial disputes in the West Philippine Sea.
“They were all very nice to me. I was able to finish my interview, with newly pedicured nails,” she told The Diarist.
For those who’ve worked with Guidote-Alvarez, her steadfast, almost stubborn, nature to accomplish a task, is nothing out of the ordinary. She would improvise, find alternatives, call up friends and former students, wake them up from sleep, just to get things done.
But now, in her 80s, legally blind and nearly deaf, she has mellowed down.
Cecile Alvarez with her mentors, National Artist for Literature Alejandro Roces, Jr and Fr. James Reuter. SJ
In her twilight years, Guidote-Alvarez has been solely hosting the 57-year-old Radyo Balintataw on DZRH, one of the oldest radio stations in the Philippines, where she tackles a wide range of topics, from climate change, women’s health, theater, culture, dance, to current issues, apart from playing old recordings of classic radio plays she produced and directed, dating back to the late ‘80s.
She shared with TheDiarist.ph how she started and continues to host one of the longest running advocacy programs on AM Radio.
Theater on TV
After founding the Philippine Educational Theater Association (PETA) on April 7, 1967, or exactly 57 years ago, Guidote-Alvarez thought of the need to expose PETA’s members to television, so she started conceptualizing Balintataw, which in Filipino means the pupil of the eye, but in a larger context has something to do with having wild imagination, or what you might see if you have a third eye.

“I designed Balintataw as a bridge between cinema and the stage, where the youth being trained in theater skills can have a ready-made laboratory experience linked with the film and entertainment industry that would likewise have a natural on-the-job training and orientation regarding the theatrical discipline of working with a literary script, whether dramatic or comic—not the regular improvised script done on taping or copycat scripts from foreign themes,” Guidote-Alvarez wrote in her yet-to-be published Memoir of a Freedom Fighter’s Wife.
“A primary goal when I conceived PETA was to initiate and sustain artistic expression that draws meaning and power from the lives of the people, and sharing the literary gems with a greater number of audiences through a Broadcast Theater-Film Program with Balintataw on Channel 5,” she added.
“No matter how little the pay, at least it provided our local writers with a little honorarium. I sought permission for award-winning pieces of the Palanca Playwriting contest to be fleshed out to reach the masses. The much-awarded playwright Bert Florentino served as our literary manager, assisted by Mauro Avena. Eventually, Isagani Cruz took over when Bert left for the US,” she wrote.
“Writers need exposure and encouragement through a regular TV performance that will give them a sense of achievement and inspire them to keep on writing with some kind of honorarium. I was glad Lupita Aquino (now Kashiwahara) agreed to be TV director and Robert Arevalo as TV host.
She got members of the PETA Kalinangan Ensemble to serve as stage directors. “This is to undertake preliminary preparation with a rehearsal with the actors for character development and memorization and preliminary staging,” she wrote.
Five months after PETA was founded, Balintataw TV premiered on Channel 5 on Aug. 19, 1967, coinciding with the Buwan ng Wika birthdate of President Manuel Luis Quezon.
The first play, whose title escapes her now, featured Armida Siguion-Reyna and Maria Eva “Chingbee” Kalaw. She employed photo journalist and award-winning photographedocumentarist/cinematographer, Romy Vitug, to work with her in filming outdoor scenes for Balintataw.

In the pre-Martial Law Balintataw, among those initiated into television were Lino Brocka, Elwood Perez, Nick Lizaso, Maryo delos Reyes, Mario O’Hara, Joey Gosiengfiao, Behn Cervantes, and Frank Rivera.
Among the stage actors who crossed over to television were Lily Gamboa, Angie Ferro, Lorlie Villanueva, Jonee Gamboa, Joy Soler, Sherry Lara, Gardy Labad, Noel Trinidad.
Like with PETA, Guidote-Alvarez directed and managed Balintataw for five years. Because of Martial Law, she and husband Heherson went on exile in the US to escape a military shoot-to-kill order on Heherson, who was tagged as a subversive.
Post-Martial Law
Internationally acclaimed auteur Lav Diaz mentioned in several interviews how he learned writing radio and TV scripts in Balintataw.
This happened in the late 1980s, when the Alvarez couple returned from exile.
Despite its absence on the air in the Martial Law years, Balintataw was honored by Star Awards as among the 20 unforgettable outstanding broadcast programs in the Philippines.
“This encouraged me to consider reviving Balintataw on TV. Another blessing was a FAMAS award for having an important role in the development of cinema recognizing Balintataw as a bridge for synergizing cinema with the stage, providing a pathway of entry of our PETA artists into film and for movie stars to consider enriching their experience by acting on the legitimate stage,” Guidote-Alvarez wrote.
Though she didn’t return to PETA anymore because it had been surviving well and had its own set of officers led by Brocka, she just tapped some of its members for the return of Balintataw.
For 14 years, the Alvarez couple lived in the US as political exiles, shown here during a Ninoy Aquino Movement meeting. Cecile revived Radyo Balintataw upon their return in the late 1980s.
Channel 4 stint
“I arranged to revive TV Balintataw on Channel 4 in 1989. We began with a drama about a rebel returnee, title escapes me now, but I clearly remember it was written by Lualhati Bautista and directed by Maryo de los Reyes. We also had a good story series on the hazing of Lenny Villa, an Aquila Legis Frat neophyte,” she wrote.
At the time, Heherson had been elected senator after having served as Agrarian Reform Minister and eventually Cabinet Secretary during the first year of the Cory Aquino Administration.
“We were able to unravel the deadly hazing process from a fellow neophyte who broke the code of silence as we revealed graphically, acted the cruel process used. I had Jose Mari Avellana direct it. This presentation won all the awards. Lav Diaz was training with us and he started writing teleplays. We also had Nora Aunor in an adaptation of Bert Florentino’s The World Is An Apple, adapted by Frank Rivera, and I had Nick Lizaso direct.”

Emmy Awards
Balintataw TV was selected as one of five soaps for social change recognized by Emmy Awards. The Philippines was one of five countries cited, with Mexico, India, Brazil and Kenya.
“The nomination was made possible by the wonderful support from David Poindexter. It was a supreme honor for our country to be recognized in the Emmy Awards, to be cited among the five Third World countries using soap opera for social change.”
Poindexter was a Methodist minister and TV producer who founded the Population Communications International.
Surviving on radio
“In spite of the cry about how television can be deadening the minds of the people with copied themes with an eternal favorite love triangle story, there was really no funding for Balintataw,” she wrote.
“Sponsors would go naturally to the commercial stations where big stars were paid highly for the starring role. Balintataw may have substance but we could not afford payment of bankable stars,” she added.
“Financial stress forced me to drop TV and remain on radio because I didn’t want to kill Balintataw per se just because we didn’t have funds.”
Creative classroom
“We have focused on Balintataw as a creative classroom on the air. I was able to talk to Fred J. Elizalde of DZRH and the president of the network, Mr. Jun Nicdao,” she wrote.
In the ‘80s, the HIV/AIDS became a global epidemic and in the Philippines, the general populace was still clueless on how to deal with it.
“In order to get funding, the first series I did was about the explosive news regarding AIDS in Asia. I got the DOH Secretary at the time, Dr. Juan Flavier, to act as himself, providing the data. It was easier to start off with an AIDS radio serial.
They did a minimum of 13 episodes to raise awareness about the disease.
“From then on, some of our television scripts we transformed into a radio version. DZRH provided us with our initial production staff, so we used some from the network and some of its resident artists and drama talents. Our time slots were changing but always coming after the long-running horror drama, Gabi ng Lagim.
“We worked on the themes of overseas workers, the drug problem, corruption, aside from portraying contemporary and literary classics serving as social commentaries,” she wrote.
Women playwrights
“We dramatized the works of noted women writers and playwrights like Estrella Alfon, Genoveva Edroza Matute and Marilou Jacob, who is distinguished in being a founding president of Women’s Playwright International.
“Apart from our PETA staple of writers, we involved young, upcoming and budding university and community theater groups.
“We also had a lot of foreign plays, where we could feature theater festivals beyond borders. We could do Shakespeare, we could do Euripides but also the current playwrights in the Arab region we translated in our language.
“We brought in Chinese contemporary plays, Malaysian, Indonesian and from other women writers from ASEAN member countries.”
Virtual history book
“The significance of Balintataw is portrayed as a virtual history book on audio as it unveiled events in the country. Radio is fresh, instant and up-to date,” she added.
When the COVID-19 pandemic struck, Balintataw became Guidote-Alvarez’s outlet and therapy. Having lost her husband on the second month of the pandemic, a widow cocooned at home, she began hosting it six days a week, learning how to use an iPad and interviewing via Zoom.
The word “Balintataw” has been associated with her name.
Visual artist and editorial cartoonist Benjie Lontoc in casual meeting told us how in his younger days, when AM Radio was a national past-time, he was surprised to hear a Filipino adaptation of No Exit by Jean Paul-Sarte. This was when radio was airing soap, fantasy adventures targeting housewives and children.
Another was the airing of Larawan as a radio play in the 1990s, with Guidote-Alvarez as the voice of Candida Marasigan.
Leopoldo Salcedo (left) as Manolo in a confrontation scene with Dante Rivero as Tony Javier in PETA’s 1968 ‘Larawan’ directed by Cecile Guidote-Alvarez. (Photo from PETA archives)
In the 1960s, she directed Larawan, the first Filipino adaptation of Joaquin’s A Portrait of the Artist as Filipino for PETA’s second season. It ran from December 1968 to January 1969 at the Raha Sulayman Theater at Fort Santiago in Intramural. In the cast were Rita Gomez (Candida), Lolita Rodriguez (Paula), Leopoldo Salcedo (Don Manolo) and Dante Rivero (Tony Javier).
Guidote-Alvarez has a funny recollection of the radio play. It was Nick Joaquin himself who told her years ago how his pedicurist suddenly started a conversation about Larawan.

Joaquin was relaxing on the barber’s chair having a post-haircut pedicure and foot spa when the lady pedicurist asked him how the story would end. Joaquin was stunned because he didn’t want to be known in the barber shop as Nick Joaquin the famous National Artist for Literature, but just a regular customer.
“He told me he almost fell out from the chair. He was a very private person and the pedicurist recognized him as the playwright,” Guidote-Alvarez, laughing, told TheDiarist.ph.
When she was first diagnosed with breast cancer in 2000, she was given only three years to live. It’s been more than two decades since then. She has also conquered COVID-19 twice.
Over and beyond her work in theater and various advocacies, Guidote-Alvarez is among the few surviving practitioners of AM Radio broadcasting.
The beauty salon incident wasn’t a first for the octogenarian radio host. She occasionally went back there to interview guests and record her shows whenever Wi-Fi connections in her home fluctuated.
Despite all setbacks, man-made or otherwise, the steadfast Cecile Guidote-Alvarez’s voice continues to be heard in this mass media platform in an era that knows mainly Spotify. As Joaquin wrote, “to remember and to sing, that is her vocation.”
(Except Saturday, Radyo Balintataw airs daily on DZRH 666 Khz AM radio after ‘Gabi ng Lagim’, and live streamed on radio.org.ph. Some episodes have been uploaded on YouTube.)

I want to thank Meatcanyon and Wendigoon for starting Creepcast. I've played around with writing horror, and here is my first short story. I will post it for free in a few other places to see what people think. Please enjoy!
A Hike to Remember
By R.L. Oclen
Chapter 1
A woman sits with hastily pulled-up fire-red hair in the waiting room of the state patrol station. The procedurally sterile off-white walls and decade-old magazines do little for comfort. With her head hanging low, her shoulders pushing forward, and her boots rapidly tapping on the floor, something has to give.
"Please just let her be okay." The woman growls as a pair of officers come in from the field. The officers' demeanors quickly change when they see the familiar face.
"Tabitha, did Officer Nichols call you?" one of the state patrol officers asked sympathetically.
"Yes, he asked me to come in and pick up a few things," Tabitha said, shooting back a muted look.
" I'll let them know you're here." The officer said, nodding to Tabitha as they passed the security door. Tabitha leaned back against the hard plastic chair, staring blankly into the fluorescent light. She had done this dance in the macabre repeatedly over the past month. The last image of her younger sister, Lisa, still burned in her mind. Tabitha had always been protective over her younger sister after their parents died. A pang of guilt shoots through her chest as she thinks about her and Lisa's argument.
"Tabitha Hymm, Officer Nichols is ready for you."
"Okay," she stood up, shaking off her guilt, and followed the officer back. The familiar surroundings of the state patrol station blurred as Tabitha stared forward. She followed the officer as they came to a rustic wooden office door, which was embossed with "Officer Nichols."
The escorting officer turns the old brass door knob. "Sir, I have Tabitha Hymm here." A grizzled West Virginia Highway State Patrol veteran sits behind the desk and nods. The escorting officer steps aside, pushing the door open as Tabitha pushes past him and slumps in the awaiting chair like so many times before. An uncomfortable relationship had formed between the two, born out of necessity and duty.
"Cup of coffee?"
"No thanks. Let's just cut to the chase. You don't have anything new?"
The worn laugh lines and Officer Nichols's face flattens. His eyebrows contour sympathetically as he shakes his head.
"Tabitha, I don't have anything else new for you. I wanted to give you the clothes returned from the lab." Her face darkened at the same response she had heard many times.
"As we discussed two weeks ago, there is nothing new and no signs of struggle or foul play," Officer Nichols said while placing a box marked evidence on the table and sliding it forward. Tabitha began to weep at the realization of Lisa's clothes in front of her. In a coordinated queue, Officer Nichols brought out a box of tissues. Reluctantly, Tabitha took a few moments to unblur her vision.
"How does someone stop their car in the middle of the Remington West Virginia State Park, lock it, and then walk into the woods?" Officer Nichols clasped his hands together and sighed at her worn question.
"Tabitha, I wish I had an answer for why your sister stopped her car in the woods and simply walked off. We're still going through her cell phone, but no signs exist that anyone forced her. On that Tuesday morning, she pulled over to the side of the road, secured her car, and walked away." Officer Nichols said empathetically.
Tabitha became stoic at the same explanation she had heard many times before. " So what next?"
"You should go back to Ohio, and I'll contact you as soon as I have more information." She winced at Officer Nichols's words. Reality began to pull at her that bills and work wouldn't wait much longer.
"If I leave, she's gone for good."
" You staying won't bring her back." Officer Nichols said sympathetically.
" So is that it? She's just gone?"
" Tabitha, I'll be honest with you. In cases like this… when people do things like this. Recovery is harder in the spring due to the weather and the animals. You know her mental condition better than I do. I can't explain why she did what she did. But until I find a solution, a suicide note, some intention, or body. She's not here. Tabitha, I'm-"
" Don't you fucking say sorry!" Tabitha stood up, screaming at Officer Nichols, throwing the plastic chair backward against the wall. " I should just look for myself."
"No!" Officer Nichols said momentarily, gripping the desk as his face hardened, then relaxed. Tabitha was caught off guard by Officer Nichols, who was normally composed. "Tabitha, I know this is unbearable. I've sat on this side of the desk and had these conversations. Trust me; I need you to be safe if I need your help later."
Tabitha nods, knowing Officer Nichols is right. She reaches down, picks up the evidence box of her sister's belongings, and leaves.
" Tabitha, if you're heading home, don't stop your car; just keep driving." Tabitha stops to look at Officer Nichols, feeling an eeriness to his words.
" Goodbye, Officer Nichols," Tabitha said as she closed the rustic wooden door behind her. She counted the tiles as she exited the West Virginia State Patrol Station. Placing her sister's belongings carefully in the back seat of her Jeep, Tabitha then sat momentarily behind the steering wheel, staring at the emblem. The familiar numbness washed over Tabitha as she pushed the start button. She pulled onto the highway, driving to the motel that had been home for the last month or so. Muted pop music accented the drive back as her mind raced with questions. Once inside the two-and-a-half-star motel room, Tabitha sat her sister's belongings on the corner table, crumbled onto the bed, and cried.
***
Tabitha wiped the steam from the slightly spotted mirror above the bathroom sink. The hot water from the shower felt good and loosened some of the stress from her body. Looking back at her, Tabitha's face was framed by damp curls around her shoulders. Her face marked the stress of the past month. Frowning, she examined the bags under her eyes; sleep had to come tonight. Walking into the living area, She changed into her favorite gym shorts and oversized sleep shirt. The alarm on her phone flashed "7:00 am," so she could drive home five hours after breakfast.
Tabitha hated feeling comfortable in this once strange room, but falling asleep was getting easier now. Her eyes closed slowly as the ceiling fan droned evenly. At first, nothing came in her dreams, but she let her guard down and slipped further into sleep.
As she dreamed of floating overhead like a bird of prey, Tabitha soared over the vast Remington National Park. The high noon sun bore down on the crisp woods, perfectly contrasting sky and forest. The heat of the sun felt good on her feathers. Distant cries rang out through the dream-like forest, catching her attention. Tabitha tilted her wings toward the screams, feeling a sense of familiar curiosity.
She now recognized the sobs and cries for help as she flew closer, her sharp eyes locked on her sister leaning against a large oak tree. She glided overhead without care, examining the situation below. Lisa clung to the tree, her eyes darting back and forth, scanning upwards. Lisa's face reflected desperation, looking for help in any direction. Tabitha lazily circles Lisa several times before perching on a sturdy branch higher in one of the oak trees. She watched Lisa intently with hunger. She bellowed deeply, hearing the unnatural sound she made, catching Lisa's eyes. Lisa's expression changed; she became calm, almost uncaring, as she stared back at Tabitha's form. Hunger grew exponentially in Tabitha as she spread her large wings. Her large eyes gaze down at Lisa before diving straight for her sister.
Tabitha jolts awake to the alarm on her phone flashing "7:23 AM." She breathes in sharply, shaking off the last horrible thoughts from the reoccurring nightmare. The strange details become more vivid each time. The lingering memories of folk stories her mother told sat in the back of her mind. In those stories, the dead would reach out in dreams as a matter of warning. Leaning back on the headboard, she searched for the advice her psychologist gave her. During their last session, Dr. Ryland explained dreams are a form of self-actualization of guilt. He told Tabitha that it was natural to feel responsible when losing a loved one in this manner.
Tabitha grumbled, lightly running her hands through her red hair; she pushed everything to the back of her mind. "Get it together!" She grumbled to herself. She pushed herself off the bed and got ready to leave. It was going to be a long trip home, and the only thing she could do now was leave things in the authorities' hands. Packing up was pretty easy since she only cycled through the outfits she brought. The local laundromat must have made a small fortune off her. Tabitha took one last look at the box of Lisa's belongings before throwing them in her duffle bag. She was thankful she didn't have to spend another night in this room.
***
Tabitha sat behind the wheel, waiting for the 90's model minivan to finish their order so she could grab a breakfast burrito on the way out. Considering the situation, the Deer Stop Family Restaurant did have a good breakfast. Finally, pulling up to the 70-style drive-in board, Tabitha rolled off the order she had been accustomed to. " I'll take a large iced tea with the double breakfast burrito meal and hash browns, please."
" Would you like some happy hot sauce with that?"
" That's fine, and a few ketchup packets as well."
" Your total is $8.79. Please pull around."
She pulled around to her window, flashed her debit card, got the receipt, and waited for her food. Luckily, the young woman serving her wasn't very talkative in the morning. The last thing she wanted was a conversation about the weather or meaningless small talk.
" Here's your large iced tea and breakfast meal. Ketchup and happy hot sauce are inside."
" Thanks," Tabitha said while mustering her best fake smile. The woman only smiled and nodded as the service window automatically closed. She pulled into the parking lot and dug into breakfast. Turning the radio to the weather, Tabitha sat back and enjoyed her meal. The local DJ read through the headlines, making nonpartisan comments about politics and grumbling about improving the economy. Tabitha powered through the updates of the "out-of-state woman" who'd gone missing. It was nice that the local radio station gave Lisa's name, description, and a missing person's number for sightings or leads. Tabitha even interviewed with the local news and radio stations, hoping it would bring Lisa home. But she soon found all it brought was a sorrowful look from the locals as she interacted with them in her day-to-day life.
Finishing the last of her hash browns, Lisa wadded up everything in the paper bag and threw it in the back seat. The 9 AM weather report said it was nothing but clear skies and sun the rest of the week. Tabitha flipped the radio over to the greatest hit station, pulled out of the parking lot, and began her trip home. She memorized the roads, every bend and turn in the early weeks as she frantically looked for Lisa. There's something hypnotic about the trees: the way they flow together. The trees' green tops and the oak trees' wide trunks were a relaxing view. Tabitha enjoyed the lazy s-curves of the road, bending and winding around the hills and the trees. The occasional farmhouse or field dotted the sides of the road as she made her way to the main highway.
The blur of a semi-truck snapped Tabitha's attention as she pulled up to the mouth of the highway. She had four and a half hours ahead of her, which would be a long ride. Tabitha pulled onto the highway and picked up speed, noting sparse traffic. She relaxed into her seat, letting her gaze gloss over the blur of green foliage. Without warning, Tabitha caught a large shadow from the corner of her left eye. When she registered the black feathery form, Tabitha tensed up and slammed on the brakes as it swooped across the vehicle's hood. Quickly, she pulled the car safely off the road. She couldn't determine exactly what it was, but it was bigger than any bird she'd seen. It was a bird, right? Tabitha turned off her Jeep and grabbed the keys and cell phone. Standing before the Jeep, she looked over the grill to see if she made contact with the entity.
Bewildered, she scanned the tree line, spotting something in the distance. Sitting in the clearing of the large oak forest was an enormous black owl. It stared intently at Tabitha with bright, shiny yellow eyes. She pushed the lock button on her keys, causing the jeep to beep securely. She turned, looking across the open field, an enormous black owl perched in the upper branches of an old oak tree. Each step she took away from the road piqued her curiosity. Soon, Tabitha stood in the middle of the open field, staring intently into the eyes of the enormous owl.
The horn of a passing semi-truck blared, pulling Tabitha's attention away from the mysterious large creature. She looked back and saw that she had walked farther away from the Jeep than she had thought. She glanced back to the forest line only to see the enormous owl was deeper into the woods than before. She narrowed her vision to find the two large, bright yellow eyes staring back. Had it moved? The day's stress, care, and worry suddenly poured out of Tabitha. It was replaced by only curiosity and overbearing tranquility. She warmly smiled for the first time in months as her feet pulled her further into the woods.
Chapter 2
The tug of gravity pulls Tabitha to her senses as her body reacts, falling forward. Her arms thrust forward, bracing for impact. Water rushes around her face as she struggles to get her bearings. Quickly, Tabitha pushed herself up in the ankle-high stream she fell in. The haze slowly clears from her mind as she stares at the muddy water. The dull ache throbs up her legs. Tabitha can smell the sweat from her clothes. Her face contorted in panic as she quickly stood up in the water, looking for her cell. Thankfully, the device was still in her pocket, dry and unscathed.
"One o'clock. How can that be?" Tabitha says, slowly looking up from the screen to see the vast, dense West Virginia forest encompassing her view. She shakes her head back and forth with disbelief. A smile gently spreads across her face, with the last bit of tranquility leaving her body. How did I get out here? Her breathing becomes faster as her pulse begins to quicken. I'm in the forest. I'm all alone—just like Lisa!
"NO, NO, NO, NO! THIS FUCKING CAN'T BE HAPPENING TO ME!" Tabitha screams into the void of trees. Her eyes well up with tears as she crumbles to her knees, gripping her phone tightly to her chest. Her sobs ring out through the thick oak trees. Her breath slows a little as she regains her composure. She begins to search her mind for anything. What is the last thing I can remember? The image of the black shadow crossing her vision while driving flashes into her mind.
"Okay, I got out of the Jeep, the…then what?" Tabitha says, trying to refresh her memories. She thinks her memory is not just gone; it's a black void in her mind. Complete blackness fills her mind right after remembering locking the Jeep and then turning to see the…
"Fuck I saw something. What was it!" Tabitha says, frustrated with her mind. She knew there must be a logical reason she was out here. Officer Nichols warned her not to go looking for her sister. She wasn't stupid; she just said that as a last-ditch effort to get him to do anything. Now I'm here.
"Run!" Tabitha heard Lisa's voice in her ear. Before she could turn around, she heard a loud bellowing coming from overhead. Fear shot down her back, reminding her of the nightmares she had over the past month. She shot forward full bore as something crashed to the ground behind her. Glancing back as she ran, a black mass of feathers convulsed between the broken branches of the trees. Its slick black feathers rippled across its surface as its bones crackled and flesh tore. Its body contorted and twisted from the shape of an owl to something bigger.
"Run, Tabby! Don't let it catch you!" Tabitha pushed forward, hearing Lisa's scream beside her face. Her breath burned in her chest, and she moved past the old oak trees bent over the creek bed. Her feet slammed rapidly, splashing along the side of the creek. Another loud bellow comes from behind as the trees bend and break to the force behind her. A small opening in the rocky creek bed catches her sight from the left. She dives into the crevasses, not caring where the fathoms lead. Tabitha tumbles in the pitch black, taking scrapes and sharp jabs from the rocks as she tumbles further into the void.
She finally tumbles to a stop on the sandy, wet floor of the cave. Her body aches from the sudden burst of exhaustion. The cool water running around her body from the creek is soothing despite her bumps and bruises. Pushing herself up, she scoots out of the water. Feeling her way forward, she finds a dry spot to collect herself. Quickly pushing her hand into her pocket, she finds her phone undamaged.
The sound of footsteps pushing against the creek fills the void around Tabitha as the light steps move closer to each other up the underground creekbed. She slowly removes her cell from her pocket and then shines the camera light toward the sound. A pair of scratched and bruised pale bare legs hold up a frail form in front of her in the creek. She wears the darkness as a shroud with nothing else to clothe her. Tabitha froze, not wanting to shine the light further in the pale form before her.
"Tabby, turn your light off. You need to save your battery." Tabitha turned off the light and then rushed forward, embracing Lisa—the how or why didn't matter, only the now. The pale form hugged her tightly. Tabitha felt her cold, bare skin. The darkness couldn't hide the feeling of the marks across her back and torso.
"Lisa, I'm-"
"Hush! I don't have much time. This wasn't your fault! I'm with Mom and Dad now. You have to survive, Tabby! Listen. Wait until the sun shines through the cracks, making a trail out. Follow it down the creek until you come to the opening. You'll see a large hill you hike up for a cell signal. And remember…If you can't see it… It can't hurt you. I love you-"
Tabitha stumbled forward before catching herself. The void in front of her arms was only filled by cool air. She looked up and noticed a faint glimmer of light pushing through the ceiling. She sat down, relaxing against the limestone wall of the cave, waiting for the trail of light to form.
***
After a few hours, the light shining through the cracks of the cave ceiling was bright enough to lead Tabitha to the other side. She stepped onto the creek bed, thankful for the sun hanging lower in the sky. Scanning the sky, Tabitha saw only a few clouds. The foothills of Appalachia backdropped the forest as she scanned for the hill. Her eyes found the trail leading up the steady slope of an impressive hill. The top of the hill was bare. Part of the hill must have sheared off in a landslide, leaving the top void of trees and a jagged cliff face. Tabitha started her hike up the back of the hill. She was careful to stay under the heavy canopy of the old trees, hopefully avoiding the creature's eyes.
She did her best to quiet her mind while hiking up the trail. Come on, almost to the top, then I can call 911, she replayed repeatedly in her mind. Her adrenaline made up for the lack of food since morning. She drank some water from a clean spot in the creek. She was placing her bet on rescue rather than worrying about the water.
Leaning against one of the trees, Tabitha took out her cell and measured the signal.
"Damn it, nothing!" She swore under her breath. She listened nervously and cautiously peered her head out from the tree line. Standing at the tree line, the cell phone still had a low signal. She pushed her anxiety down with a swallow and slowly stepped forward onto the bare rock. Tabitha was now out in the open. She walked with the cell phone pointed upwards, measuring the signal. Within three feet of the cliff face, her signal bar punched up to full. Tabitha began to punch in the numbers just as a pair of large yellow eyes appeared. She felt her legs become weak, and her vision blurred as the creature snared her in its gaze.
Tabitha ducked, missing the giant owl's claws as it swooped for her. She squinted her eyes shut, momentarily breaking the hold of the infernal beast as it crashed to the ground, tumbling down the path of old trees. On her hands and knees, she tucked the dialed phone back into her pocket. She heard the creature's loud bellowing, followed by the snapping of bone and flesh ripping. It was changing its shape to finish her off.
Tabitha tried to get up, but the flash of its eyes did something to her. Her legs were numb, her stomach was in knots, and she could barely put a few thoughts together.
"If you can't see it, it can't hurt you." Tabitha heard clearly in her left ear. She quickly pushed herself into a sitting position and fumbled for the key chain in her right pocket. Pulling the long chain of keys, luck charms, and keepsakes, her father's Swiss army knife dangled at the end. She slowly opened the half-inch blade. Her body wholeheartedly rejected her plan and tried to fight her. Every internal warning system sounded as her body fought against her as she brought the blade against the corner of her left eye.
She didn't know if she could do it until the creature bellowed in her direction. With one quick motion, the half-inch blade sliced across her left eye. The world dimmed and then went black on her left side. Behind her, the beast's thundering gallop was getting closer. Tabitha plunged herself into total darkness with the last bit of her strength. Her hand gripped tightly around the bloody knife as she folded forward onto the ground. She could feel herself weeping blood. She squinted, doing her best to stem the tide of blood loss.
A large feathered paw drove into Tabitha's right side, flipping her onto her back. She lay still as the hulking creature stood over her. It remained motionless, and Tabitha was confused about why it didn't move or bite her. Then she started to giggle, just a little at first. Then, laughing madly into the creature's face as it growled back at her. She could not see it; she couldn't see anything. Her mind couldn't be eaten!
The creature roared into Tabitha's face while plunging one of its sharp claws into her shoulder. Tabitha screamed in pain, slashing the knife downward. The blade hit something soft, and she ripped the blade down, rending whatever she had hit on the abomination. A bright yellow, foul-smelling liquid gushed in a torrent over Tabitha's face. She turned to cough, having swallowed a portion of it. The creature reared back, squealing in pain. Its hind leg came down hard on Tabitha's leg, snapping her tibia. She jerked her leg up, causing the creature to tumble forward and fall over the edge of the cliff side.
Tabitha heard the creature crash below at the base of the hill. A large dead tree speared the creature through its chest. Tabitha could hear the labored whines of the creature as its cries became weak and slowed. A wave of sickness hit her as she rolled over and vomited. The foul smell drenched her. She did her best to focus, reaching into her pocket and pulling out the phone. By memory, she typed in the unlock pin. She held her breath and placed her thumb where the call button should be.
She could hear the call being made then, "911. What is your emergency?"
"Please help me! A bear has attacked me, and I can't see. I think I am on a hill."
"Ok, ma'am, stay with me! Do you know where you are located?"
"No, I'm lost. Please send help."
"It's okay. Stay with me on the phone, and I'll use the cell signal to try to find you."
"I'm on top of one of the hills. I think I am lying on a bare roc-" Tabitha slipped unconscious with the cell still tightly in her hand. Her body began to tremble and convulse.
"Ma'am! Ma'am! Stay with me. I have help on the way."
Chapter 3
A young man in military fatigues frantically compiles images and reconnaissance data from his drone feed. Confirming his hunch, he commands the winged surveillance drone to make a hard left and send a live video feed. His eyes widened as he saw a large owl-shaped shadow crash onto the top of a hill. He watches in awe as the sleek black owl twists and shifts into something much larger, like a grizzly. As the drone turns, he sees a woman at the cliff's edge trying to steady yourself on her hands and knees.
He bolts up from the command module, jotting down the drone's coordinates on one of the printouts. The drab government-issued office motif for the watch station blurs in the corner of his eye as he rushes down the hallway to the watch commander's office.
"Sir, recon has eyes on AMOS! And it's feeding!" the man said, swinging the heavy wooden door open. He took the hastily compiled file and pushed it forward to the commanding officer.
An older, tanned man quickly stands, reaching for the files. His brow furls, seeing his charge is awake. "Keep eyes on it! Go Adams!" The young man nods, turning on his heel and bolting for the drone command module. As his office door slams shut from the subordinate officer, he grabs his headset and frantically dials the closest military outpost to the coordinates.
"Hello, Sergeant Klein; this is Agent Smith of Black Watch outpost 7948! Shadow is active, code Alpha, Mike, Oscar, Sierra. The coordinates and data package have been sent. A civilian is on the ground; deploy strike-and-rescue ASAP.
"We'll be up in five, Agent Smith! The line cuts as Agent Smith closes out the call on his headset and rushes to the door. The normally quiet watch station buzzes alive, with personnel flooding the central command station. The background echoes resource allocation calls, frantic typing, and the hum of cold computers warming up.
"Adams, get our eyes back on Amos!"
"Coming back around in 30 seconds." Thirty sets of eyes stare at the three giant screens, anxiously waiting for the drone feed to clear the bank of trees. The camera clears the tre top to see the giant feathered grizzly rear back slinging its massive head away from its prey. Its large yellow right eye spews bright yellow liquid all over the red-haired woman and the cliff face. The giant feathered grizzly missteps, crushing the woman's leg and causing the creature to tumble over the cliff face.
"Fuck!" Agent Smith yells in horror as he watches AMOS fall four stories, impaling a sharp, 3-meter-tall log lodged in the boulders. The command center freezes wide-eyed at the flailing dying creature on screen. Agent Smith pulls his cell out quickly and dials.
"Klein, Scrub the current request! AMOS is down! Switch to rescue and harvest now!
"What, someone took out AMOS?"
"YES! It's at the bottom of the cliff, bleeding out essence! The woman is covered in it as well. Clean as much of it off her as possible before you take her to the ER.
"Understood!"
Agent Smith, in a rage, slings his phone straight forward, connecting with Private Adams's skull. Adams flinches at the sudden impact of the hard plastic and covers his head. Agent Smith grabs the table in front of him and flips it over, sending the computer equipment crashing to the government-issued tiled floor.
"A two-year cycle gone! All that essence is gone! Now I have to wait another 24 months for AMOS to resurrect!" Agent Smith screams, causing the rest of the staff to recoil away in fear.
"Jones!" Agent Smith says sternly, turning to a petite woman on his left. She stares at him, pleading.
"Yes Sir?'
"Get Officer Nichols on my office line. That fuck up has some explaining. He should have told us AMOS was awake."
"Right away!" Jones quickly sits back down and begins dialing Nichols, thankful she doesn't have to deal with Agent Smith further. The command center quickly shifts gears as Agent Smith returns to his office.
***
Two Weeks later…
"Tabitha… Tabitha… This is Doctor Wilhelm. Wake up." The kind older gentleman said as they gently nudged Tabitha in her hospital bed.
"Where am I?" Tabitha asked, waking from what felt like years of sleep. She sat up, the world still pitch black, but an odd sense of the world around her seemed to hum just behind her eyes.
"You're in the hospital, dear; you scared us. Do you remember anything?" He said as he sat down on the side of her bed.
Tabitha thought for a moment the last parts after she slashed her eyes were a blur. She remembers people yelling and the sound of two or three helicopters over her. " No, it's really all just a blur."
"Well, it's probably for the best. You had some very serious injuries. The first night, we honestly didn't think you would make it. Then…" The doctor trailed off with a concerned expression, not knowing how to explain things further.
Tabitha felt his pulse quicken somehow. She didn't understand it but fully felt or sensed the doctor beside her. She sensed the two other nurses standing at the end of the bed. Her body didn't hurt. She felt great. She felt hungry.
"Doctor, you said had. What happened to my injuries?" She said calmly, trying not to startle the old doctor further.
"Well, Tabitha, it's the closest thing to a miracle I've ever seen. You had violent seizures from the minute you hit the entrance of the ER. We couldn't even set your leg. The medications we gave you had a minimal effect, and you thrashed so much that we had to restrain you. Then, the early morning check-in found you in a deep sleep. All but your eyes were completely healed. So we switched gears to support care and treated your eyes the best we could." He said, watching her reaction.
Tabitha leaned back in her bed, taking in the wild account. "Do you know how I healed so quickly?"
"What happened to you is beyond all scientific reason. A miracle is the only way the staff and I can explain it. I know you have been through a lot, but I want to check your eyes."
"Thank you for all your help, Doctor Wilhelm." She said, sitting up in bed.
"You are most welcome, dear. Now I am going to unwrap your eye-dressing. Hold still, please." he said as he reached up and pulled on the bandage tape. Tabitha felt a quick tug and felt the bandages loosen from around her head. The doctor slowly unwrapped the bandages. The doctor's brow wrinkled as he examined the two large black scabs covering Tabitha's eyes.
"Tell me if this hurts at all, ok?"
"Yes, doctor." She relaxes as the doctor's gloved fingers pass over the scab. He pushes and gently tugs at the side of one, and it starts to lift. He pulls on the scab more, and Tabitha begins to sense the light as it hits her eyelid.
"Oh, I can sense the light, Doctor Wilhelm!" She said, smiling.
"Wonderful! Nurse Allen, please hand me some saline solution. I think a little water will loosen these right up. Hold still; this may feel cold," he said as he reached for the solution. She felt the cool liquid flush over the left eye, then the right. The scabs fell away with a gentle tug from the doctor. She could see the light shine through her eyelids. She grinned widely, happy to have some form of sight left.
"Please open your eyes for me," he said as he sat back on the bed. Tabitha slowly opened her eyes. The flood of light was almost too much, causing her to squint. After a few moments, she adjusted to the fluorescent lights. Three figures began to take shape in front of her. First, the distinguished older features of Doctor Wilhelm came into view quickly, followed by the brunette and blonde younger nurses standing at the end of the bed. Suddenly, her vision snapped into place, crisp and clear.
"I can see perfectly! This is amazing! Thank you, Doctor Wilhem!" she said, turning to look directly into his eyes, but he stared back at her unmovingly.
"Doctor Wilhelm?" she said as her expression became more worried. Doctor Wilhelm just sat staring, intensely focused on her eyes. His expression was overbearingly calm. She glanced at the nurses, rigidly staring back at her with trapped, calm expressions. Doctor Wilhelm began to twitch slightly. It traveled from the base of his spine out to his limbs, finally convulsing.
"Doctor Wilhelm, are you okay?" Tabitha yelled as the doctor began to have a seizure and fell on top of her bed.
"Help Him!" She screamed at the two nurses only to see both of them crumble to the tiled floor. One of them bashed her head off the bed frame. Tabitha recoils back from Doctor Wilhelm in terror as he starts foaming at the mouth. She climbs over the bed rail and hits the tiled concrete floor with a thud. Her adrenaline surges as she bolts for the door, looking for help.
At the entrance of her hospital room, she sees another nurse leaving the adjacent room. "Please, my doctor and staff need help!" As the male nurse turns to see Tabitha, he suddenly goes stiff before collapsing into a violent seizure, spilling his cart over with him.
"What's happening!" Tabitha screams, thinking something is in the air, or everyone has come down with something. A pair of security guards round the corner, hearing the screams and commotion.
"Ma'am, are yo-" The guard freezes mid-stride as he makes eye contact with Tabitha. Both men start to convulse and topple over, thrashing violently on the hard tile.
"No, no, no, no!" Tabitha yells as she darts into the women's bathroom, a few doors up the hall. She runs in, terrified of the situation. She approaches one of the sinks, bracing herself against the cool porcelain. Her stomach turns, and she dry heaves in the sink. She steadies herself while turning on the cold water. Leaning in, she takes a drink. As she looks up, a glint of two yellow eyes catches her. Tabitha stumbles backward on reflex. Then, she sees her reflection in the mirror. Two completely bright yellow eyes stare back at Tabitha. She screams at herself in the mirror, not feeling hungry anymore.
The end.
I will

The forest road was pitch black. Endless abyss of darkness only further deepened by no sounds, other than the heavy downpour. Trees on each side, leaning menacingly as if threatening to break free of their root and step onto the asphalt. What little light would there have been on a clear night, was now swallowed up by the stormy clouds above. There seemed to be no end in sigh to this rain.
Jessica stood on the side of the road, leaning on the rusted and bent metal railing, looking across to the other side. Her blond hair messy, her make up ruined, her olive green dress clinging to her body, soaked with water. Despite the disheveled look, the girl was there with a purpose. A simple goal, to be picked up by a passing driver as hitchhiker. Though that had proven a task more difficult that it seemed. The stretch of asphalt she was on, that cut through the woods, no longer was the busy road she remembered. A highway that was made not too far away, took the majority of traffic and people away from the winding roads.
But she did not mind, for the highway helped her. Like a sifter that separated regular sand from whatever larger chunk of rock one might find, the highway separated the mundane and tired people going between towns from the deviant and ill-intended people that still used the back roads. The wait may have been longer now, but that only increased the odds of finding her next potential victim.
Her patience paid off, as a pair of high beams appeared around a curve. The headlights seemed to be swallowed by the darkness of the forest, barely illuminating much. She moved from the railing and closer to the edge of the road, as the car pulled over in front of her.
The passenger side window rolled down some, and a voice of a man came from inside. "Everything alright hun? Need a ride?"
Without a word she reached for the handle. Unlocked, how typical. Her victims always gave themselves away with their eagerness. Their fake desire to help her only working against their attempts to mask their true intentions. She opened the door and sat inside the passenger side, before the car began moving once more.
"So, where to?" The driver asked.
The rhythmic squeaking of the windshield wipers masked her breathing. "Just on the other side of the woods. I'll let you know when to pull over."
Jessica glanced at the man. He was dressed nicely, most of them were. Sleeves rolled up to his elbows, revealing tattoos on both arms, that started at the wrist and disappeared up the sleeve. He had a few rings on, including a black ring on his ring finger. Not much of a surprise, some of them didn't even bother taking off their wedding rings. For when it came to the end result, it would not really matter anyways.
"For the next 300 meters, keep going straight." The GPS sounded off, breaking the silence for a brief moment.
"So, what are you doing all by yourself in this storm, in the middle of nowhere? That dress doesn't seem very waterproof." The driver smiled slightly, attempting small talk.
Jessica felt her guts churn, her insider burning with rage. But she chose to keep her silence, not wanting to ruin her plans. The man seemed to have picked up on the hint and kept on driving without another word.
"In the next 200 meters, turn left."
The rain was not letting up, the visibility still almost nonexistent. It felt to her as if the entire car was driven only by relying to the GPS.
"In the next 300 meters, turn left."
Another turn, now they were no longer on the main road that lead out of woods. The car was moving slowly, as the man kept following the GPS's advice, turning on narrower and narrower roads.
"You've missed my turn." Jessica said softly but sternly.
The man did not reply. He merely put the car in reverse, seemingly trying to get back to the main road.
"In the next 50 meters, turn right."
With a deep sigh, he turned off the GPS, before moving down another side road. Soon dirt and mud replaced the asphalt and the car seemed to struggle to move through it, only moving deeper between the trees. Jessica knew all there roads like they were hopscotch by now. She's been taken to each and every one of them, multiple times. She could remember every curve, every bend and bump, every oddly shaped tree on the side. Anger only seemed to bubble up inside her more, her hair standing on end at this point.
She's been there for years, waiting to get revenge on those who had confined her to these woods, to that very road, but they never showed up. So she's been taking care of others, men just like them, in hopes of saving other like herself from a gruesome fate she could not avoid.
The driver seemed frustrated too, driving like he was looking for something. Probably a spot where the rain would not be that much of a hindrance. Veins bulged on his neck and on the arm that was gripping the wheel, his knuckle turning almost white from how hard we was squeezing it. He did not speak, deep exhales giving away all she needed to know.
Her hair began to stand up on its own, her nail elongating, her skin turning pale and her eyes losing their youthful glow. "You've. Missed. My. TURN." She said once more, unfastening the seatbelt, her voice sounding like a growl.
The man turned towards her, locking eyes with her. His expression took her by surprise. Sheer annoyance and frustration. "Bitch I KNOW." He said, pronouncing it quickly, in one breath, while pointing his right hand at her, as the car stopped.
The lights in the car, the GPS and radio, even the wipers and headlights began to flicker and crackle. Jessica was still stunned, but her determination did not waver so easily.
"You think I live in Bummfuck Calamazoo, in the middle of the woods? Do I look like Tarzan? I missed my turn too, obviously we're fucking lost." He continued, before pressing his palms together and against his face, before inhaling deeply.
"Huh, what?" Jessica mumbled, fully confused at this point at his lack of proper reaction, her hair falling back down on her shoulders again.
"In 150 meters tu-"
"SHUTUP!" He smacked the GPS, turning it off again, before mumbling a few more cuss words at the device and taking another calming inhale.
"Listen, I'm sorry. I know how this might look, being picked up off the side of a lonely road at night by a stranger. Every woman's nightmare. I'm not taking any turns with nefarious intent, I just can't see shit and the GPS is making me drive in circles. I've been driving for half a fucking hour and I can't seem to find the exit. Having to rely only on the GPS cuz I can't see a fingers worth of distance in front of the car, ain't helping neither." Finally he leaned in his seat, running his hands across his head, before pulling a pack of cigarettes out of his shirt pocket. He put on in his mouth, offering her too without a word.
She nodded and pulled out a cigarette from the crumpled box, as the cars electronics slowly stopped going haywire.
"So, how long?" The driver asked, lighting her smoke and then his, drawing a long inhale.
"What?" She asked, somewhat relaxing in her seat as the confusion began to die down.
"How long you've been dead?" He said, still looking at the roof of the car, listening to nothing but the drumming of rain against the exterior.
Jessica was stunned, caught of guard entirely. The whole situation seemed surreal. Her victims screamed, prayed, tried to fight back, tried to run, but never this. A part of her wanted to open the door and run out into the night herself, back to the side of the road where he had picked her up. The man did not repeat the question, but the silence told her he was waiting on an answer.
"About..." She paused. "20 years, I think. Hard to keep track."
"Hmmmm, I see. They found you yet?" He continued, the calmness of his voice, like asking a kid what they've done in school, made her uneasy. The fact that she knew what each question meant exactly didn't help either.
"No. Wait, how do you know? Who the hell are you?" The ghost finally regained enough composure to ask.
"Sugar, I've been around the spooky block more than once. Who I am?" He paused, rubbing his beard as if thinking if he should answer or not. "Doesn't matter."
"So, what now? I mean, sorry, this is uncharted waters for me. Do I go back to the road side? Do you exorcise me? Do we sit here and smoke?" She sighed, giving up on the idea of trying to make sense of the situation.
"Now I call triple A and get someone to tow us out this mud and back on the main road. Then, if you do not mind, you show me where your remains are. So I can do you right by this world, at least." He pulled out his phone, before looking at with a sour frown. "Of course no fucking signal here."
"Oh, that's me. Sorry." She reached over, something she had not done in over 20 years, and gently tapped the phone, making the device work properly again.
The driver wiggled the phone as if saying "thanks", before sending his location to the tow company.
"We gotta wait for the rain to stop or at least die down before they can send anyone here." He said, putting on his coat and opening the driver side door. "So how about a little nightly stroll ay? Show me where they left you."
Without waiting for confirmation, he walked over to her side of the car and opened the door, while holding an umbrella. "Here, you've been rained on enough."
Jessica got our of the car, stepping under the umbrella, feeling an odd sense of warmth inside. She's never been this close to a man, since that horrid day, without tearing them apart in fury. The two made their way deeper into the woods, the man letting her lead the way. All she could think of was that perhaps now, her rage will finally see its end.
[]
Rattle of the keys woke up Boogie and Woogie, as they ran over to the front door barking and snorting.
"Hey boys, you've been good?" Miles said, walking in after trying to wipe his muddy shoes on the doormat with little success.
He bent down to pet his two dogs, before taking off his wet coat, as well as the remainer of his muddy and rain soaked clothes, leaving them as a pile on the floor for the bulldogs to sniff on for a bit, while he went and poured himself a drink.
"What a night." The naked man mumbled, sitting down on his couch and checking his automated answering machine.
"You have... 7... missed calls from.... Detective Anthony."
"Uuggghhh fuck." Miles groaned, getting up and walking over to his discarded pile of wet clothes and rummaging through it until he pulled out his cell phone.
Walking back to the couch with a glass of booze in hand, he kept the phone pressed against his left ear. It didn't take more than 4 buzzes before someone on the other side picked up.
"Heey, Ant-man. What's up?" Miles grinned, addressing the man on the line.
"Don't call me that." Said the tired voice. "Where have you been? I've been calling you all evening."
"Oh you know. Ran into a girl. You know the drill." The naked man replied.
"I see. She found?" Anthony asked.
"She is now. I'm sending you the location right now."
"Good. I'll send someone from the department there tomorrow."
"That can't be the only reason you called me 7 times." Miles continued.
"Right. Listen, we've got a case down in Waco. I could really use your... expertise on the matter." The Detective said.
"Now, what skills could the homicide department need from a horror novel author?" Miles cackled a bit, taking a sip and finishing with an exaggerated lip smack and exhale.
"Cut the bullshit Miles, it's way too late for this. You want to help, or do I gotta find another nutcase that can talk to corpses?" Anthony replied, his tone of voice going from tired to annoyed.
"Okay okay, don't get your badge stuck between your ass cheeks Detective. I'll be at your office tomorrow, as soon as my car get cleaned." The writer said before handing up the call and tossing his phone on the nearby cushion. He finished his drink, sighed and leaned against the couch, looking up the ceiling, the events of tonight still fresh in his mind.
(Hi y'all. This one is a bit less aliens and super powers and a big more idk. HorroThriller? I'm not sure. I mean, as long as humans are at the forefront, I think it does not violate any rules on here.
Decided to write something different, while cooking up part 6 for Sand & Steel, that should drop tomorrow, if my schedule allows it.
I hope you guys like it, let me know your feedback in the comments. Have a wonderful evening.)

September 25th, 2023 Phoenix, Arizona
It's been fifteen years since I made it away from the creature in Manistee National Forest. My therapist said that I need to write about it, but every time I do, I don't know how to start. She told me to go through some old things from that time in my life and see if it starts any gears moving in my mind. I found a journal I kept that I'd completely forgotten about. I flipped to that day of the camping trip 15 years ago and wrote an entry for all the days we were out there.
I'd just graduated with a bachelor's in Journalism and mass communications. It'd been years since I'd seen my best friends and we decided to go camping. I'd write in my journal every day. I would write at the end of my day or a few days later if I didn't have time the night before.
My hand is shaking just writing this part, and I haven't gotten to the actual meat of the story. Ugh, Meat. That word makes me shutter.
I'll type the journal entries here:
September 25th, 2008, Manistee National Forest, Michigan
It's a beautiful day here in Manistee National Forest. The sun is shining through the leaves of the trees, and a light breeze is rustling the leaves. The scent of pine needles is strong in the air, and the sound of a nearby creek adds to the moment's serenity.
We've set up camp, and our tents are scattered about, creating a small community amid this natural wonderland. My friends, Remy and Will, are already starting a fire, laughing and joking as they work together to build a blaze. I feel a sense of nostalgia wash over me as I watch them, remembering the countless times we've been on adventures like this one.
I look around, taking in the beauty of our surroundings. The trees are tall and robust, their branches reaching up towards the sky like reaching arms. The underbrush is a patchwork of ferns and wildflowers, swaying gently in the breeze. There's a small creek not far from our campsite, its water clear and calm, perfect for swimming or washing up.
I make my way over to the fire, joining Remy and Will. "Hey, guys," I say, my voice filled with excitement. "This place is unbelievable."
Remy looks at me, his signature grin spreading across his face. "Yeah, man. I can't believe you talked us into this. You know how Will here hates camping." We both laugh while Will just rolls his eyes.
"Well, I figured it'd be a great way to reconnect," I say, glancing at Will. "You know, since graduation and all." An awkward silence hangs between us for a moment, and I can feel the tension that's always there whenever we're together. There's this invisible barrier we can never entirely break through since I left for college.
Remy leans in close, lowering his voice to a conspiratorial whisper. "So, Landon, have you heard from anyone else? You know, old friends and whatnot?" He glances knowingly at Will, who shifts uncomfortably beside the fire.
I feel my cheeks flush red as I look at Remy. "Well, uh, not really. You know how it is. We all sort of went our separate ways after high school." I change the subject to focus on something other than the tension between us. "So, have you guys been out here before?"
"Nah, this is Will's first time," Remy says, nudging him playfully. "But I've been wanting to bring him out here for ages. I've heard these woods are teeming with wildlife. You know, bears and shit like that." He laughs, but there's a slight edge to his voice.
Will looks unconvinced. "Yeah, right. Bears in these woods? You just want to scare me."
"No, seriously," Remy insists, his eyes sparkling with excitement. "There are black bears out here. We could even go on a hike and find some. You know, get up close and personal with nature."
I glance at Will and then look back at Remy. We should stick to the campsite for now. You know, just enjoy the weekend and relax." Will says.
"Ah, come on," Remy whines. "This is the perfect opportunity. You might never get another chance to see a bear in the wild." He looks challengingly at Will as if daring him to refuse.
I decide to change the subject again, not wanting the tension between them to ruin our weekend. "Hey, guys, you want to help me gather some wood for the fire?" I ask, gesturing toward a fallen tree nearby.
Will looks relieved at the change of topic. "Sure, I can help with that." He stands up and follows me to the log while Remy remains by the fire.
We spend the next hour chopping wood and stacking it by the fire. The air is filled with the rhythmic thud of axes striking wood and the sounds of nature around us. The sunsets cast the forest in a warm, golden light. It's a beautiful sight, and for a moment, it feels like we're all part of something larger than ourselves.
Will and I continue to work in companionable silence, our minds drifting to our thoughts. It's odd how things change after high school. We used to be inseparable, but now our lives have gone in such different directions. I can't help but wonder if we'll ever find our way back to that closeness we once shared.
As the sun dips below the horizon, we join Remy by the fire. He sees the wood we've stacked with approval and pulls a few logs from the pile to keep the fire going. The flames leap to life, casting flickering shadows across our faces and dancing along the tree limbs overhead.
"So, Landon," Remy says, his voice taking on a more casual tone now that gathering wood is done. "How's life been treating you?"
"Oh, you know. Work's been good." I pause momentarily, trying to find the words to explain how different our lives have become. "It's just weird, you know...we don't see each other as much anymore. Our lives have taken us in different directions, you know?"
Remy nods, his expression somber. "Yeah, I know what you mean. It's hard to keep up with old friends sometimes, especially when you're both so busy." He glances at Will, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips. "But it's good to have you both here together, even if it is just for the weekend."
I feel a pang of guilt as I look between them. I've been neglecting them, focusing too much on my life and career. I've always considered them my best friend, but maybe that's changed over the years.
We decide to go to sleep after hours of reminiscing around the campfire. The stars twinkle above us, and the sounds of the forest lull us into a peaceful slumber. As I lay in my sleeping bag, I can't help but wonder about the weekend ahead. I feel a sense of camaraderie with Will and Remy, but there's also an underlying tension that I can't quite put my finger on.
Suddenly, I heard what I assumed was an animal moving just outside the campsite. I stood up quick and looked around but saw nothing. Will and Remy were asleep, their breathing slow and steady. The air felt tense, and the forest seemed to whisper secrets that I couldn't quite make out.
I decide to walk over to the edge of the campsite to see if I can spot anything. As I step carefully through the underbrush, I notice another noise like before, like something moving fast. I look up, trying to catch sight of it, but I can only get a blur moving out of sight. It moves so fast that it's hard to see where it went.
I return to the campsite, shaken by the experience. Will and Remy are still asleep. The air feels tense, and the forest seems to whisper secrets I can't quite make out.
I decided to get back into my sleeping bag and hoped it was just my eyes playing tricks on me. But as I close them, I feel the same sense of unease creeps back in. The air feels thick like something is watching us, waiting for the perfect moment to strike. I can't help but wonder if there's something or someone out there that we should be worried about.
I'm going to try to get back to sleep.
September 26th 2008
We woke up and made some eggs and bacon that we'd brought in a cooler. The air was cool and crisp, and the forest took on a different hue since last night. There was an edge to it, a tension that we couldn't quite shake. As we ate, we talked about our plans for the day.
After breakfast, we packed our camp and started hiking deeper into the woods. The trees grew thicker, and the underbrush more dense. The air felt heavy with the scent of pine and damp earth. I couldn't tell if it was my paranoia about last night, but I could've sworn I kept seeing something darting just in the corner of my eye. I sighed in relief when Will mentioned it, too.
"Are you guys seeing that?" Will asks in a shaky voice.
My head quickly turns to him, and we make eye contact, a silent understanding of our fears.
"What are you talking about?" Remy snapped
"I keep seeing something dart out of my vision," I say
"That's what I'm seeing too!" Will says in an excited relief that quickly turns to fear once again.
We kept hiking silently as the woods grew denser and the air grew heavier. I could feel the tension in my shoulders, my muscles tensing up.
"I swear to god something is following us." Will whispers as he looks over his shoulders.
Remy laughs, trying to sound more confident than he feels. "Guys, come on. There's nothing out there; it's just nerves." But the way his eyes dart around, I can tell he's not entirely convinced.
We continue to hike deeper into the woods, the air growing heavier with each step. The underbrush is so dense that it's hard to see more than a few feet in front of us. I can feel the sweat starting to bead on my forehead.
We find a small clearing and set up camp again. We brought some firewood with us, so Remy started a fire immediately. The sun is beginning to set and I can tell Will is still on edge about what we saw while hiking. Remy keeps himself busy with the fire, and I can tell Will's uncertainty makes him weary.
"I'm going to take a shit over here so no one disturbs me," Will says as he points toward some bushes and gets up.
"Need any help?" Remy asks playfully, but Will does not react.
Remy and I silently sit by the fire before I ask, "Will seems a little on edge. Is everything okay?"
Remy looks at me, his eyebrow arches in confusion, "Do you not know?"
I stare at him in silence, shaking my head, confused.
"Dani and Will broke up last month. He's not really doing great right now." Remy informs me
The news shocks me. Will and Dani were inseparable in high school, almost annoyingly so. We would never be able to hang out with Will by himself. Dani made his way into our friend group by force through Will.
"Oh shit. I had no clue." I say
Will walks over as he rubs hand sanitizer between his hands. "What's for dinner, boys?"
Remy pulls out the cooler and opens it. He rummages a little bit before pulling out an ice pack. He looks confused and flustered as he frantically tries to find something in the cooler.
"It's empty," Remy says as he slowly looks up at us.
"Stop fucking around-" Will begins to say before we hear the rustling on the outskirts of the clearing, we all quickly turn our heads toward the direction.
There's a sudden silence as we all realize what's happening. Something, or someone, is stalking us.
Will stands up and screams, "Who the fuck is there? Come out, you fucking coward!"
Silence fills the forest as all animals and wind stop suddenly. Will's face melts into fear. We all sit in silence as we wait for something to happen. When nothing happens after a few minutes, Will turns around slowly and makes eye contact with me. Suddenly, something large, like a black wolf but far more significant and almost human as it stood on only two legs, quickly jumps out behind Will and digs its large knife-like claws into both his collar bones. It pulls Will back into the forest, and we hear his cries fade the further he is dragged.
Remy and I stare at the empty space that once held Will in horror. My heart is pounding out of my chest, and I feel like I can't breathe. Remy turns to me, his eyes wide with fear, "We have to go now. We have to leave."
I nod in agreement, unable to find my voice. We both stand up and quickly gather our things, looking around wildly as we decide which direction to go.
As we grabbed things, I heard a large thud outside the clearing where Will stood. Afraid to look, I signal for Remy as he stares at something in horror behind me. I'm still too scared to look, but I force myself. I couldn't tell what it was at first. There, tossed carelessly, lay a pile of skinned human limbs, a torso, and a head. The fleshless appendages were jumbled together in a chaotic mess, bones jutting out at odd angles and sinew glistening in the dim light. The head, stripped of its skin, bore vacant, eyeless sockets, its teeth bared in a permanent, macabre smile. The sight was horrifyingly surreal as if a butcher had gone mad in some twisted nightmare. The air was thick with the metallic scent of blood, a stench so overwhelming it made me gag. I couldn't tear my eyes away from the ghastly scene, every detail etching itself into my memory with sickening clarity.
Before we could say anything, a loud, lion-like roar filled the forest and echoed into my skull. I swear I felt the vibrations of the sound inside my head.
Remy grabs my arm, and we start running deeper into the woods. I can hear the beast behind us, getting closer with each passing second. My heart is racing, my lungs burning for air. I don't know what's chasing us, but I know we have to keep running.
We run for hours through dense forests and across open fields. The sun begins to set, casting an eerie glow over the landscape. I try to keep my bearings, but I'm disoriented and terrified. Remy trips over a fallen log and lands hard on the ground, wincing in pain.
"Keep going," he gasps, struggling to get back up. "We have to keep going."
I don't want to leave him to limp, but I know we can't stay here. I nod, taking a deep breath to steady my racing heart and force myself to keep running. Behind me, I can hear Remy pushing himself up, his footsteps scrambling over the leaves and dirt.
We continue through the forest, the shadows growing longer and darker around us. The trees seem to close in, forming a dense, impenetrable wall that traps us within. I try to remember the way back to the car, but I'm so disoriented now that I'm not sure I could find it even if I tried.
I stop hearing the Monster behind us, so I stop to catch my breath. Remy runs up behind me, limping. He falls onto a rock, sitting down as he struggles through wheezing breath. He pulls out his inhaler, takes three big puffs, and holds it in. He struggles until he finally releases and coughs. I look at him, and he glares back at me. He's scared.
"I don't know where we are," I whisper. "I don't know where to go."
"We have to keep moving," Remy says, still slightly wheezing from his asthma attack. He pulls himself up onto his feet and offers me a hand, but I look away, still needing to catch my breath.
"I don't know where to go," I whisper, my voice barely audible over the sound of my racing heart.
Remy hesitates for a moment, his brow furrowed in thought. "Listen," he says, his voice quiet but steady. "If we stay here, we're dead. We have to keep moving."
He takes my hand and pulls me to my feet. I can feel the warmth of his skin, and it somehow grounds me. We walk again through the dense underbrush, our footsteps muffled by leaves and dirt. The darkness around us is almost complete now, but I can still see Remy's figure as I check on him behind me.
"Do you even know where we are going?" I ask
Remy stays silent as he continues to limp behind me. I focus on the sounds around us, hoping to find some clue as to where we are or where we should go. The forest presses in on us from all sides, blocking any possible escape. My heart is still racing, my breath coming in short, ragged gasps.
"Okay, we have to stop." I hear Remy say behind me. I look back and see that he's already sitting on the ground, carefully taking the shoe off the hurt foot.
He winces in pain as he struggles to get the hiking boot off. When he finally gets it off, he peels the sock off to expose his swollen ankle.
"Ah fuck!" Remy says in pain as he realizes his injury is worse than he thought.
I walk over to him as he rests his head back onto a rock in defeat, "I can't keep going."
I sit beside him, hopefully comforting him, but he looks offended.
"You can't stay with me, Landon. At least one of us has to get out of here." Remy says between breaths.
I ignore him and rest my head on the rock next to his. Before I knew it, he was snoring. I knew the pain wouldn't let him sleep for long, but he needed it. I also drifted off eventually.
September 27th, 2008
I was awoken by Remy's winces as he tried to sleep. I looked at my watch, and it was 3am. I knew we were both exhausted, but I couldn't help but feel restless. I decided to stand up and stretch, wincing as my sore muscles protested. I looked around, trying to find some sign of civilization, but the forest seemed to stretch endlessly in all directions.
I nudged him gently. "Hey, let's keep going," I said softly. He opened his eyes blearily and looked at me. He looked around for a second in confusion and then remembered the day prior as he let out a long sigh.
I put his arm around my shoulder and lifted him so we could keep walking. The pain in his foot was unbearable, but I knew we couldn't stop. After what felt like hours, we stumbled across a dirt road. It was faint in the moonlight, but we could make out the tracks from a car or truck.
I slowly let Remy down to sit as I decided to follow the road to try and find help. It was still pitch black all around me, but the moon lit the road.
After assuring Remy that I would be back, I went on my way. The dirt road wound through the dense forest, the trees pressing in on either side like they were trying to keep the light away from me. I tried to focus on putting one foot in front of the other, but my mind kept drifting back to Remy, wondering if he would be okay.
I was so lost in thought for what must've been hours as the sun started rising. I didn't notice the sound of something big following me from the forest edge. My mind must've been racing so much that I didn't notice. I couldn't hear the giant footsteps when I stopped. Only when I started walking again did the Monster continue to follow from the tree line.
I turned toward it, my mind tired and exhausted as I screamed, "What the fuck do you want?! Come get me; I'm right here!" I was too tired, both physically and mentally, to fight or run anymore as I accepted the same fate as Will.
I heard it move some more, and I closed my eyes and braced myself for what was coming. I heard something quickly leave the tree line and land before my feet. I waited, but nothing happened, so I slowly opened my eyes and looked down at my feet.
I saw another human body, limbs, head, and torso torn apart. I could see Remy's shirt torn within what I can only describe as 'Meat.'
I screamed as I realized this was Remy's remains. I fell back onto my butt and frantically scooted myself backward, away from the Monster that I knew hid behind the brush in front of me.
The creature slowly stands from a squat, fully revealing itself. It must have been over seven feet tall, jet black, leather skin and fur. Its face was like a wolf, but its teeth went on forever like a great white shark. It stood there, breathing heavily, staring me down. I didn't know what to do. I sat there forever, thinking about the pain I was about to be in. I thought about Will's screams as he was yanked into the forest.
Suddenly, a loud bang from a rifle fills my ears from behind me. I close my eyes, and my ears start to ring. I've never felt more disoriented in my life. Moments seemed to slow down as I opened my eyes and saw the Monster gripping its shoulder as it roared in my direction and ran further into the forest, away from the edge.
Time is still moving slowly. I look back and see an older man with a short military-grade buzz. It was white with age, and his full but kempt beard still had sprinkles of pepper.
Suddenly, time returned to normal as I observed my surroundings. I saw the pile of meat that Remy once inhabited, and I quickly made my way to my feet, backing away from the man with the rifle.
He cocks his head, looking at me curiously as I approach him cautiously. "Are you... okay?" he asks, lowering the rifle slowly to his side.
I stare at him in disbelief, unable to make myself say anything. He looks at me with understanding eyes and then gestures for me to follow him. I do as he says, walking slowly behind him as he starts back down the dirt road.
I look behind me at Remy's pile and stop, "I can't leave him here like this." I say, "We have to at least bury him."
The man lets out a sigh of annoyance but comes around after a few seconds and helps me bury Remy off to the side of the road.
I stand in silence in front of the pile of dirt as the man waits impatiently a few feet away. I start to think of all the memories all three of us had. I wished I could return to get Will, or at least whatever remained of him, and give him a semi-proper burial like Remy.
"We'd all met in fourth grade," I say out loud to the man waiting for me.
He looks back at me in surprise.
"We had Ms. Birtch. She was so mean, we called her Ms. Bitch." I chuckle to myself.
"Look, we gotta get out of here now. I know you just lost your friend, but we can come back later to reminisce." The man says as he looks at me, annoyed.
I look up and realize he's right. I kneel and place my hand on the dirty pile before getting up and following the man further down the dirt road.
We walked for about 30 minutes, and the sun glared in our eyes as it rose. The old man's name was Steve, and he seemed to be a former soldier, but he didn't talk about it much. He had a way of making me feel safe and protected. He led me to a small cabin nestled in the trees off the dirt road. The cabin was quaint and well-maintained, with a small garden out front and a few chickens scratching around in the dirt.
"This is my home," he said as he opened the door and gestured for me to enter. "Please, make yourself comfortable."
I enter the home and immediately ask, "Do you have a phone? Mine doesn't have service out here."
He shakes his head, but I follow him as he enters the kitchen. He opens the old white fridge door and pulls out a milk carton. He places it on the dining table and fetes a glass from above the sink. He grabs another one and gestures it toward me. I look down at the milk and shake my head no. He only grabs one glass and sits at the table as he pours himself a glass of milk. He takes a long gulp and places the glass back down. He gestures for me to sit, so I do.
"I don't have a phone here," he says, "but I know where we can get to a radio to get you out of here." The man says as he takes another sip of the milk.
I look at him, confused. "What do you mean get me out of here?" I ask, still sitting down at the table.
He looks past me, so I turn around and see a picture on the wall. It's the man but much younger. He was surrounded by three children and a woman. It must be his family.
"Does your family live here too?" I ask
He stops, moves his gaze back to me, sits back in his chair, and sighs.
"They used to." He says in his grizzly voice.
I waited for him to expand, but he never did.
"Did that... monster... get them?" I ask hesitantly, not wanting to offend the man who saved my life.
He gets up from the chair and goes to the window above the sink. He stares for a long time before speaking. "I guess technically they're still here."
I get up and stand next to him, looking into his backyard. It seems overgrown, as if it has not been tended to in years. The grass was growing between brick paths, and bushes reached across the path like thick underbrush. Everything was unkempt except for one square. In that square, there were four headstones. The man's family.
"Yes," the man says as I look at him, "that monster got them."
I helped the man do chores for the rest of the day until the sun went below the mountains.
The rest of the night was spent planning how to get to the radio tomorrow morning. He said it was in an old radio tower up in the mountains.
The man told me I'd need to rest for tomorrow, but as I slept in the cot in the living room, I couldn't stop dreaming about the Monster and what it did to Will and Remy or what it would do to me.
September 28th 2008
As expected, I didn't get much sleep, but when the man shook me awake, it was still dark out. He told me to dress warm, as the radio tower was a ways up the mountain and the air would be cold. I dressed quickly in the clothes he had laid for me, and we set off into the darkness. The stars were visible, twinkling above us as we hiked through the woods. The man led the way, moving silently through the darkness, his hand resting on a walking stick.
The man was more talkative today as if he hadn't had anyone to talk to in years. I learned his name is Gary, and he and his family lived in Boston. They decided to take a no-technology vacation out here four years ago. They rented the cabin he brought me to, which Gary now owns. He came from money, so that was never the problem.
When I asked why he lived out here, he paused briefly before saying, "I can't leave my family." That was the last thing he said before we reached the tower.
It took about an hour and a half to make it to the tower. It was overgrown, and Gary told me it had been years since he'd last climbed it. When we reached the top, the first rays of sunlight began to peak over the horizon. The radio tower was ancient and rusty, and the steps leading up to it were rickety at best.
"So, what's the plan?" I asked as I carefully made my way up the steps.
The man stayed silent and kept climbing the winding stairs. Something seemed off like the man had changed.
Gary looked down at the tree line below us. I looked too and only caught a blur as the creature ran off and the bushes swayed in its place. Gary grins and looks at me, "Go down."
Surprised, I stare at him, confused. He grabs me by the shirt and pulls me closer, "Go. Down." His hot, stinky breath envelops my face. He pushes me back, forcing me to grab the railing to keep myself from falling. When he sees that he failed in pushing me, he snarls and continues climbing the stairs faster, skipping a step.
I hear the Monster's roar right below us as I see it climbing up through the metal grate. I freeze, not knowing what to do. Then I hear Gary's voice over a PA system. It rings loud into my ears before he talks, "Kid, I said get the fuck down. You don't need to be another victim of this thing!"
Still frozen, even more confused by his words, I look down again and see the Monster climbing the metal poles that held the structure up. I watched the creature scale the radio tower with an eerie, almost unnatural agility. Each movement was swift and precise, powerful claws gripping the metal rungs effortlessly. The tower seemed to shudder under its weight, a low creaking sound accompanying each ascent. I could see its eyes glowing with a feral intensity, focused on something far above. The sight was both mesmerizing and terrifying, a primal fear gripping me as I watched this Monster get closer and closer to me.
Finally, I snap out of it when Gary's voice fills the sky again, "Let's fucking go, you mangey half-breed!"
The creature seemed to move faster at his voice like it knew him personally. As it finally made it to me, it leaped toward me on the stairs, but I could move to the side and almost dodge it completely. It jumped so far that it nearly flew off the side of the tower. As it reached for the railing to save itself from falling, it snatched onto my elbow, slicing it so bad I could see the bone.
Grabbing onto my wound, trying to keep my skin from peeling completely off, I started running back down the stairs. The Monster looks down at me, and I can tell it's about to pounce on me, but Gary's voice distracts it again, "You don't want that little shit, you mutt! Come get some seasoned meat!" The Monster starts climbing toward Gary again.
Gary starts laughing. A laugh only a person who has given up on everything could. It slowly turned to sobbing as I heard his last words, "I love you, Mary, Lilly, and little Amber. Margaret, I'm sorry, but I can't live without you-" Just then, the Monster made it to the top, where Gary was in a little structure attached to the tower.
Everything was silent. I started sprinting down the stairs, almost to the bottom, when my hearing went and I only heard a ringing. Again, things moved in slow motion as I looked up and saw an enormous explosion coming from the structure Gary was in. The ground started to rumble as things went back to average speed, and I tried to make it down in time before the whole rickety structure collapsed.
It must've been adrenalin that got me out in time. The tower began to crumble and toppled in the opposite direction of me.
I stood there, waiting for the Monster to emerge, but it never did. I sat down, still holding my wound as it seeped warm blood all over me. I sat there, knowing help was not coming, accepting my imminent death for what felt like hours.
I must've passed out because the next thing I remember was having water thrown onto my face as I lay on the ground. A man and a woman were tending to my elbow wound and, in my delirium, snatched my arm away and began running from the rescue team. I ran for what felt like hours before passing out. I later learned that I ran only about 50 feet before passing out. Now I'm in the hospital tending to my elbow.
How will I ever live with this? How could I go on?
September 25th, 2023
I only remember a little after that. I remember telling authorities about the Monster and how it mauled Will and Remy. I also told them about Gary, and they were able to find all three bodies, well, what was left of them. They never saw any sign of the Monster, though.
After telling them the unbelievable story, I have to admit, I would have a hard time believing I was a suspect in all their murders. After years of trying, they could never find any evidence against me.
After many attempts to end my life, I decided I wouldn't let that Monster win; even after it was out of my life, I refused to let it be the reason I go.

DAY: May 19 2024

• 5-19-2024 ILLNESS TOOK AWAY HER VOICE. AI CREATED A REPLICA SHE CARRIES IN HER PHONE Alexis Bogan, whose speech was impaired by a brain tumor, uses an AI powered smartphone app to create a audible drink order at a Starbucks drive-thru on Monday, April 29, 2024, in Lincoln, R.I. The app converts her typed entries into a verbal message created using her original voice. Credit: AP Photo/Steven Senne The voice Alexis “Lexi” Bogan had before last summer was exuberant. She loved to belt out Taylor Swift and Zach Bryan ballads in the car. She laughed all the time—even while corralling misbehaving preschoolers or debating politics
• 5-19-2024 SMART CONTACT LENSES LEAD THE WAY FOR HUMAN-MACHINE INTERACTION Scientists have developed eye-tracking smart content lenses based on radio frequency tags that can be used for various applications, including health care and augmented reality (AR). The lenses are biocompatible and imperceptible, requiring no battery or conventional silicon chips. Smart contact lenses that can keep track of various health factors and can be used for human-machine interaction (HMI) are a relatively new technology.
• 5-19-2024 INTEL EXEC ON BRINGING ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE INTO THE WORKPLACE Artificial intelligence is just about everywhere you look these days—including the workplace. That means training staff about the technology and using it responsibly is critical. It’s a tall order, especially as the commercialization of generative AI continues its rapid growth. Now some tech players have kickstarted initiatives in hopes of meeting that need. Christy Pambianchi, chief people officer at Intel, recently spoke with The Associated Press about how the semiconductor chip maker is expanding AI education programming beyond the company’s walls—as well as best practices around
• 5-19-2024 JUST BELIEVING THAT AN AI IS HELPING BOOSTS YOUR PERFORMANCE, STUDY FINDS Sometimes it seems like an AI is helping, but the benefit is actually a placebo effect—people performing better simply because they expect to be doing so—according to new research from Aalto University. The study also shows how difficult it is to shake people’s trust in the capabilities of
• 5-19-2024 FEMALE HEALTH APPS MISUSE HIGHLY SENSITIVE DATA, STUDY FINDS Apps designed for female health monitoring are exposing users to unnecessary privacy and safety risks through their poor data handling practices, according to new research from King’s College London and University College London (UCL). In the most extensive evaluation of the privacy practices of female health apps to date, researchers found apps that handle medical and fertility data are coercing users into entering sensitive information that could put them at risk.
• 5-19-2024 OPENAI GIVES CHATGPT NEW POWERS TO SEE, HEAR OpenAI and Microsoft are in a heated rivalry with Google to be generative AI’s major player, but Facebook-owner Meta and upstart Anthropic are also making big moves to compete. OpenAI on Monday released a higher performing and even more human-like version of the artificial intelligence technology that underpins its popular generative tool ChatGPT, making it free to all users. The update to OpenAI’s flagship product landed a day before Google is expected to make its own announcements about Gemini, the search engine giant’s own AI tool that competes with ChatGPT
• 5-19-2024 CHATBOTS TELL PEOPLE WHAT THEY WANT TO HEAR, RESEARCHERS FIND Chatbots share limited information, reinforce ideologies, and, as a result, can lead to more polarized thinking when it comes to controversial issues, according to new Johns Hopkins University–led research. The study challenges perceptions that chatbots are impartial and provides insight into how using conversational search systems could widen the public divide on hot-button issues and leave people vulnerable to manipulation. “Because people are reading a summary paragraph generated by AI, they think they’re getting unbiased, fact-based answers,”
• 5-19-2024 STUDENTS, ACTIVISTS, ENTERTAINERS: MINECRAFT’S GLOBAL APPEAL Since the first version of Minecraft was released to the public 15 years ago, the block-based world-building game has become a global phenomenon. Since the first version of Minecraft was released to the public 15 years ago, the block-based world-building game has become a global phenomenon. Players of all ages and backgrounds have used the game for everything from educational projects and architecture to building communities and creating artwork. With more than 300 million copies sold, it is the best-selling video game of all time.
• 5-19-2024 SWISS NURSERY LETS ROBOT DO THE TALKING Swiss children in a Lausanne creche have some fun with their new robot friend, Nao. Sat in a circle on the nursery floor, a group of Swiss three-year-olds ask a robot called Nao questions about giraffes and broccoli. By the time these children become adults, interacting with robots may well be as commonplace as using a smartphone, experts believe. So one Lausanne creche has decided to give them a head start.
• 5-19-2024 EU TO ENCOURAGE INFLUENCERS TO HAVE ‘POSITIVE’ IMPACT Younger audiences increasingly get their information from influencers as they turn away from traditional media. The EU announced steps Tuesday to encourage influencers to post content that has a “positive” impact on society, as concerns rise over disinformation in a fragmented information landscape. With online creators increasingly the preferred source of news and opinions for younger audiences in the European Union, Brussels said they needed to be helped to use their role wisely. Ministers from EU countries responsible for culture, audiovisual and media issues approved a series of steps
• 5-19-2024 THE METAVERSE COULD CHANGE OUR RELIGIOUS EXPERIENCES, AND CREATE NEW ONES New technologies have always informed and changed our religious experiences. Listening to early radio broadcasts in the 1880s was experienced by many as religious because radio voices seemed to come from some other dimension. Séances became wildly popular at the time because it was thought by some that radio had opened a door to the spirit world. Today, religion is experiencing new transformations. The information-rich, image-laden character of the internet can provide new ways to understand and explain religious activity.
• 5-19-2024RESEARCH SHEDS LIGHT ON THE WEB OF TRUST, PRIVACY AND SAFETY FACTORS SHAPING USERS’ EXPERIENCES ON FACEBOOK MARKETPLACE Love it or hate it, Facebook Marketplace is the largest online resale site today with more than one billion monthly users.
• 5-19-2024RESEARCH SHEDS LIGHT ON THE WEB OF TRUST, PRIVACY AND SAFETY FACTORS SHAPING USERS’ EXPERIENCES ON FACEBOOK MARKETPLACE Google on Tuesday rolled out a retooled search engine that will frequently favor responses crafted by artificial intelligence over website links, a shift promising to quicken the quest for information while also potentially disrupting the flow of money-making internet traffic. The makeover announced at Google’s annual developers conference will begin this week in the U.S. when hundreds of millions of people will start to periodically see conversational summaries
• 5-19-2024 NEW STRATEGIC DESIGN APPROACH FOCUSES ON TURNING AI MISTAKES INTO USER BENEFITS More and more often, automated lending systems powered by artificial intelligence (AI) reject qualified loan applicants without explanation. Even worse, they leave rejected applicants with no recourse. People can have similar experiences when applying for jobs or petitioning their health insurance providers. While AI tools determine the fate of people in difficult situations daily, Upol Ehsan says more thought should be given to challenging these decisions or working around them. Ehsan, a Georgia Tech explainable AI (XAI) researcher, says many rejection cases are not the applicant’s fault.
• 5-19-2024 MANAGING SCREEN TIME BY MAKING PHONES SLIGHTLY MORE ANNOYING TO USE Existing apps for managing screen time can abruptly lock users out of their phone. If users were in the middle of an important task, they could scramble to skip the time limit, opening themselves up to spend more time on their phone than originally intended. InteractOut’s interventions are more gradual and allow users to decide when to put down their phones while also encouraging them to think harder about their smartphone use.
• 5-19-2024 DIGITAL TWIN HELPS OPTIMIZE MANUFACTURING SPEED WHILE SATISFYING QUALITY CONSTRAINTS Feedrate optimization using an uncertainty-aware digital twin demonstrates significant cycle time reductions of up to 38% in a CNC machine tool while staying close to the error tolerances compared to the existing methods. A new method uses a digital twin to optimize manufacturing machine speed—known as feed rate—while adhering to quality constraints,
• 5-19-2024 THE INCREASING DIFFICULTY OF DETECTING AI- VERSUS HUMAN-GENERATED TEXT Generative artificial intelligence (AI) tools are used to create text, images and videos, impacting the way society consumes and produces online content. As that technology continues to evolve, it is becoming increasingly difficult to tell the difference between AI-generated and human-generated content. Determining the integrity of online information—particularly text—is the current research focus in the Penn State Information Knowledge and wEb (PIKE) Lab, led by Dongwon Lee, professor in the College of Information Sciences and Technology at Penn State. In a discussion with Penn State News, Lee spoke about the
• 5-19-2024 RESEARCH TEAM WORKS TO IMPROVE AI-BASED DECISION-MAKING TOOLS FOR PUBLIC SERVICES More and more public services—such as affordable housing, public school matching and child welfare—are relying on algorithms to make decisions and allocate resources. So far, much of the work that has gone into designing these systems has focused on workers’ experiences using them or communities’ perceptions of them. But what about the actual impact of these programs have on people, especially when the decisions the systems make lead to denial of services? Can you design algorithms to help people make sense of and contest decisions that significantly impact them?
• 5-19-2024 CINEMATIC TOOLS CAN SIGNIFICANTLY IMPROVE USER EXPERIENCE IN VIRTUAL REALITY ENVIRONMENTS Without teleportation, many users would be unable to use virtual reality due to motion sickness. Unfortunately, teleportation can cause users to miss important aspects of their surroundings. Credit: Alan Medlar Cinematography techniques can significantly increase user engagement with virtual environments and, in particular, the aesthetic appeal of what users see in virtual reality.
• 5-19-2024 HUMAN DIFFERENCES IN JUDGMENT LEAD TO PROBLEMS FOR AIThe noise level observed in ComVE annotations when controlling the minimum (a) and maximum (b) allowable labels for each turker (we omit the residual in these two figures as, similar to what was observed earlier for TG-CSR, it was nearly coincidental with the level noise curve). We also report the statistics of statements categorized by the number of annotation labels under different cutoff methods used for screening participating annotators
• 5-19-2024 HUMAN DIFFERENCES IN JUDGMENT LEAD TO PROBLEMS FOR AI Innovation is rarely accidental. Behind every new invention and product, including the device you are using to read this story, is years of research, investment, and planning. Organizations that want to reach these milestones in the fastest and most efficient way possible use technology roadmaps.
• 5-19-2024 HUMAN DIFFERENCES IN JUDGMENT LEAD TO PROBLEMS FOR AI A team of researchers at Delft University of Technology has developed a drone that flies autonomously using neuromorphic image processing and control based on the workings of animal brains. Animal brains use less data and energy compared to current deep neural networks running on graphics processing units (GPUs).
• 5-19-2024 US SENATORS UNVEIL ‘ROADMAP’ TO AI LAWS Top US lawmakers on Wednesday said efforts to pass laws governing AI were entering a higher gear and hoped to pump $32 billion into the sector to help assure US dominance. US Senate Majority Leader Chuck Schumer said bipartisan legislators had agreed on a policy roadmap and had tasked key senate committees to draft specific proposals on regulating AI. The US is home to the biggest AI companies in the world and has trailed the EU and other regions on coming up with rules to rein in the sector.
• 5-19-2024 US SENATORS UNVEIL ‘ROADMAP’ TO AI LAWS Google chief executive Sundar Pichai says the AI revamp of its online search engine will soon spread to countries other than the United States. Google’s use of artificial intelligence to sum up answers to search queries has publishers wondering if traffic to their websites will wither. The internet titan announced Tuesday it is introducing AI-generated answers to online queries in the United States, in one of the biggest changes to its world-leading search engine in 25 years.
• 5-19-2024 CONSUMER GROUPS ACCUSE TEMU OF MANIPULATING ONLINE SHOPPERS Chinese shopping app Temu has on average around 75 million monthly active users in the EU. European consumer groups on Thursday accused Chinese shopping app Temu of using “manipulative techniques” to make users spend more and other violations of a landmark EU tech law. One of the fastest-growing apps, Temu only entered the EU market in April 2023 and says it has on average around 75 million monthly active users in the 27-country bloc. Europe’s BEUC umbrella consumer rights group filed a complaint with the European Commission while 17 member
• 5-19-2024 PARENTS UNDERESTIMATE THE PRIVACY RISKS KIDS FACE IN VIRTUAL REALITY Nearly two thirds of parents of children aged 5–10 don’t understand the metaverse, according to the Institution of Engineering and Technology. Credit: Kampus Production/Pexels/public domain Virtual reality lets kids play 3D games with their friends as avatars, go back in time, even journey to outer space, all without leaving their living rooms. But while children are immersed in the metaverse, they also face privacy risks that their parents might not recognize
• 5-19-2024 MODEL DISGORGEMENT—THE KEY TO FIXING AI BIAS AND COPYRIGHT INFRINGEMENT? By now, the challenges posed by generative AI are no secret. Models like OpenAI’s ChatGPT, Anthropic’s Claude and Meta’s Llama have been known to “hallucinate,” inventing potentially misleading responses, as well as divulge sensitive information, like copyrighted materials.
• 5-19-2024 CAN WE RID ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE OF BIAS? AI giants face a challenge of making artficial intelligence models reflect the world’s diversity without being overly politically correct. Artificial intelligence built on mountains of potentially biased information has created a real risk of automating discrimination, but is there any way to re-educate the machines? The question for some is extremely urgent. In this ChatGPT era, AI will generate more and more decisions for health care providers, bank lenders or lawyers, using whatever was scoured from the internet as source material.
• 5-19-2024 CHATGPT IS NOW BETTER THAN EVER AT FAKING HUMAN EMOTION AND BEHAVIOR OpenAI executive Mira Murati launching GPT-4o. Credit: OpenAI Earlier this week OpenAI launched GPT-4o (“o” for “omni”), a new version of the artificial intelligence (AI) system powering the popular ChatGPT chatbot. GPT-4o is promoted as a step towards more natural engagement with AI. According to the demonstration video, it can have voice conversations with users in near real-time, exhibiting human-like personality and behavior. This emphasis on personality is likely to be a point of contention. In OpenAI’s demos, GPT-4o sounds friendly, empathetic and engaging. It tells “spontaneous” jokes, giggles, flirts
• 5-19-2024 MOST PEOPLE STILL THINK BARRISTERS NEED TO SOUND POSH, RESEARCH SHOWS—BUT ACCENT DISCRIMINATION SERVES NO ONE In the UK legal system, a barrister’s job is to present formalized legal arguments in court and at tribunals. Training to become one, therefore, involves considerable focus on oral skills. It is considered important that barristers have the ability to speak “eloquently.” This risks people thinking there is a “correct” way of speaking in order to be successful in this career. Accents, of course, play an important role here. Accent-based bias discriminates against speakers with non-standard accents—people whose speech differs from Received Pronunciation (RP).
• 5-19-2024 A MINUTE’S SILENCE IS FINE BUT WHEN IT COMES TO VIOLENCE AGAINST WOMEN, BEING QUIET ISN’T ENOUGH Sport has a role to play in creating a culture of respect, yet women in sport are often seen as “less than” on almost every measure: salaries, sponsorship, broadcasting, leadership, access, media, coaching, officiating, uniforms and support. Research shows 3 out of 4 Australian men are gender equality supporters, but very few (17%) prioritize taking any action. As Australia grapples with a “national crisis” of violence against women, what can men in sport do to help?
• 5-19-2024 ARE CANADIANS TOO POOR TO BREAK UP? Why did Al and Peg Bundy from the sitcom Married… with Children never get divorced? After all, they were rarely happy and constantly arguing. Maybe they felt they were the best they could do for each other—a middle-aged homely shoe salesman and a stay-at-home mom with two kids. They cared for each other, but they also hated each other deeply. And neither ever cheated, despite having the opportunity. However, what if the Bundys lived in Canada today?
• 5-19-2024 REPORT LOOKS AT ‘POVERTY STIGMA’ THROUGH A NEW LENS TO STAMP IT OUT OF SOCIETY Stigma is a glue that holds poverty, inequality and economic insecurity in place enabling and exacerbating inequalities of wealth, health and opportunity, says a new report. Poverty stigma is a “wicked social problem,” highly complex, difficult to define and challenging to solve
• 5-19-2024 HOW CRAFT-BASED FIRMS PROJECT AUTHENTICITY THROUGH CREDIBLY AND VISIBLY COMMUNICATING THEIR IDENTITY Consumers are drawn to authenticity when it comes to craft-based firms, and a study looked at how managers in identity-driven markets are challenged to maintain their authenticity as their company’s scale of operations expands. In such craft industries, the authors note, overt claims of authenticity by producers are ineffective.
• 5-19-2024 PSYCHOLOGICAL RESEARCH OFFERS STRATEGIES FOR HEALTHY POLITICAL DISCUSSIONS AMONG PEOPLE WITH OPPOSING VIEWS Civilized political debates may seem increasingly out of reach as democracies across the world face rising polarization, but people still want to discuss issues with people they disagree with—especially those who present themselves as balanced and willing to seek solutions that work for everyone or open to learning new information, according to two studies published by the American Psychological Association.
• 5-19-2024 MORE THAN HALF OF AMERICANS GIVE TO CHARITY AT CHECKOUT, SURVEY SHOWS 53% of Americans give to charity at checkout, and young and diverse people tend to do it more often, according to new research from Binghamton University, State University of New York. Credit: Binghamton University, State University of New York Fifty-three percent of Americans give impulsively to charities at the checkout, and certain demographics tend to give more, according to a new survey conducted by faculty at Binghamton University,

I used to listen to the games on a pair of FM radio headphones so I had the straight WTAM/WMMS feed. Lately I've been using the MLB app to listen to the MLB Radio feed and it seems one of the only advertisers they get are from Cordell & Cordell, who want to talk to us about the trials of divorce when you own a business.
As a radio listener I'm used to hearing the same ads 18 times a game but this ad is such a bummer. What's worse is that the ad keeps coming in too early, interrupting Hammy's end-of-inning musings and going straight into the pain of losing your business and the respect of your children in a divorce.
Not quite as bad a commercial as Misogyny Cigars, but at least that guy didn't interrupt the broadcast with his rant about how much he hates his wife.

First of all, I'm only making this post because of what I'm going to call a psy-op. "He made Graduation" was one of the biggest Ye memes ever and it made me feel like a mental hospital patient. It felt like I had woken up in an alternate reality where the general consensus was that Graduation was Kanye West's magnum opus. You could make a case for every other solo album in my eyes, maybe not Jesus Is King but there are nuances to that album which make it better than Graduation.
Here's my ranking of the songs from this album for context;

1. Drunk and Hot Girls
2. Everything I Am
3. Barry Bonds
4. I Wonder
5. Stronger
6. Good Morning
7. Flashing Lights
8. Bittersweet Poetry
9. Homecoming
10. Good Night
11. Big Brother
12. Can't Tell Me Nothing
13. Champion
14. Good Life
15. The Glory

Everything below Flashing Lights is bad, over half the album if you count Good Night & Bittersweet. Like genuinely a majority of these songs are so repetitive and annoying they probably rank close to the very bottom of Kanye's released discography for me. The biggest problem with this is that Graduation is inherently a narrative-based album and yet most of the songs- even the ones I like are so fucking repetitive. All the depth and variety present in College Dropout & Late Registration is gone, nearly every song sounds like it's meant to be the radio hit.
Drunk and Hot Girls is my favorite Kanye song ever and people hated and continue to hate it because it's experimental, it's dark. This album is supposed to be about how the celebrity, rapper life isn't as good as Kanye imagined. He's graduating from the Chicago backpack kid to become (at the time) probably one of the most influential celebrities. But the lyrics are not nearly as introspective or gritty as we get in other songs or later in his career. Drunk and Hot Girls perfectly, fucking flawlessly captures the dark energy the album should've had. But the rest of the album is just Kanye trying to make radio hits with almost none of that energy.
You can analyze the album in that way if you want. You can say "Oh but look at the track listing, it goes from these cheery songs like Champion and Good Life and then descends into dark songs like Barry Bonds and Drunk and Hot girls before coming out the other end with a reborn Kanye in Homecoming and Big Brother" I FUCKING GET IT OKAY I UNDERSTAND THE ALBUM however it's simply not an especially well executed version of this concept, the same concept which has been vaguely explored in every Kanye album since Late Registration.
The same narrative basically existed in Late Registration two years prior. That album is bouncing back and forth between these hype, uplifting songs like Touch The Sky and then ends on Gone which a song about how the celebrity/rapper life wasn't as good as Kanye imagined and now he doesn't really want to live it anymore...

And that make me wanna get my advance out And move to Oklahoma and just live at my aunt's house Yeah, I romance the thought of leaving it all behind Kanye step away from the lime Light like when I was on the grind

...but without the annoying songwriting of Graduation. That's my biggest critique, Graduation is literally just annoying. Like it's hard to listen to. My ears do not like listening to the chorus of Good Life. Does anyone actually like Good Life? There can't be anyone who doesn't think that song is just annoying what the fuck I don't buy it

• MBDTF is an album about reflecting on the hedonism and worship of celebrity idols in Hollywood.
• Yeezus is an album about the music industry being harmful to artists participating in it, how rappers are the new slaves for Hollywood executives.
• Pablo is an album about balancing what Kanye instinctively wants, being sex and hedonism and his family.
• Ye is an album about balancing Kanye's mental health and relationship with the media and what's best for his family.

These are all twists on the core narrative concept Graduation was attempting to execute and they're all pulled off far better- in much less bloated, more experimental, more cohesive albums with instrumentals more interesting than the likes of headache inducing sample flip like Champion or The Glory. Graduation is the worst, most primitive blueprint to what would later become the soul of Kanye's later discography, it's the least subversive, most commercial record he's ever produced.
my next rant will be about why donda 2 wouldve been kanye's best album

(At the Hazbin Hotel, Charles is walking from the side to the other)
Charles: Okay. So the extermination is coming in six months instead of a year. No big deal. Just a little setback. Nothing we can't handle. Just angels cutting our timetable in half. But who needs a whole year to save souls? (Manically) Am I right? And next time, when they cut the time in half again and again, we'll handle it, right?! (Vagner holds him)
Vagner: Yes, we will.
Angela: Oh, please, ya had less than half a chance when you started all this salvation bullshit. And now...(Seems a lot of messages beeing sended) Ain't no silver lining this time, toots.
Charles: Sure there is. We just have to look a little harder for it.
Angela: Well, while you're lookin, the rest of Hell is going nuts. (Shows her phone) People are already freaking out about the news. Look at what's happening in the Doomsday District.
Charles: Err, what is a "donkey show"?
Angela: Aah, heh, nothing. My boss, Tina, is just freaked out about the news, too. Like I said, everyone's losing their shit.
Vagner: Yeah, that's true. Sinners are desperate. Maybe desperate enough to try anything to escape the extermination?
Charles: (Gasps) This is the perfect time to recruit more sinners for the hotel!
Angela: Cute idea and all, but you really going to go out in all of this? (Shows ger phone with demons running desperate)
Charles: Well, is not like are just going to show up in our doorstep.
(A explosion shaddles a wall, Charles screams and outside a snake woman is seen in an airship full of weapons)
Miss Pentious: Show yourself, Alice! Come and face...(Don't anything on the wall, and sees Alice drinking coffee in a balcony) Oh, there you are...Face my wrath!
Alice: Who are you?
Miss Pentious: Who am I? Who am I? I am the great Miss Pentious! Inventor, architect of destruction, villain extraordinaire!
(Alice teleports to the hotel's entrance with Angela, Charles and Vagner)
Egg girl #1: Ooh! You tell 'em, boss!
Niffter: (Gasps) Ooh, she's a bad girl.
Alice: Huh, well if all that's true, you'd think I'd have heard of you.
Miss Pentious: I attacked you literally last week. We've done battles, like...20 times.
Alice: Well, you must have been really bad at this.
Miss Pentious: Silence! Now cower! For when I've slain you, the almigthy Vees will finally acknowledge me as their equal!
Niffter: Ooh! Wait, who are the Vees?
Alice: Oh, nobody important.
(At the Vee Tower, some demons are seen at a tv shop)
Tv announcer: New VixTek designer voyeur scopes. Peeping on the neighbors has never been more stylish. VixTek. Trust us with your money.
(The demons enter the store and leave holding boxes)
Tv announcer: This week's episode of "Yeah, I Fucked Your Sister, So What?" is brought to you by VixTek. Trust us with your entertainment. VixTek. Trust us. Trust us. Trust us. Trust us...
(In a room full of tvs, a woman with a tv head drails all the tvs energy while laughing and spying everyone)
Vix: Now that's good television! (Her face shows a call screen, shoots a lighthing at one of the tvs and does a phone call) Hello, there, Veener. How are you this hellish morning?
Veener: Oh, cut the shit, Vix. I need you up here now!
Vix: Whatever could be the problem my dear?
Veener: Your little girl toy is wrecking my departament while I'm trying to pull together a show and...
Valentina: Fucking bitch!
Veener: Just get your ass here. Now! Damnit, Valentina!
(Static and Vix smiles faits)
Vix: (Sighs) Oh god, here I go. Valentina. Just another fucking day with Tina. Hey, hey, hey. Fuck my life. (Gets in a lift that takes she up to her office, fulled with reporters)
Reporters: Mrs Vix! Mrs Vix! Question over here. Mrs Vix!
Reporter #1: Mrs Vix. What are your thoughts on the new extermination deadline?
Vix: My dear people, we at VixTek Enterprises have always been at the forefront pf innovation. And now with this new oncoming threat, we are shifting our focus to your protection. We are please to annouce VixTek Angelic Security is coming soon. Trust us with your safety.
(Vix's eye hipnotizes all the reporters)
Employee #1: Ma'am? Uh, when did we begin working on Angelic Security?
Vix: 30 seconds ago. Try to put that fucker Carmillo on the books and cancel all my appoinments today. I have a fire to put out upstairs. (Turns into electricity and gets in a security cam)
(In Veener's design studio)
Veener: Ugh. No. Unacceptable. You're fired. What is this? Wrist ruffles? Is it 1750? Burn it like the witches who wore it.
(Vix appears behind Veener)
Vix: Oh, Veener. I can see you're busy. Tell me, where's our hot haded friend now?
Veener: Up in her tower, waiting for a flat-faced princess to calm her down.
Vix: (sighs) And uh, what's got her so out of sorts today?
Veener: Who knows? But she tore up my best model. And you know the show can't wait for that unlucky fucker to put himself back together. Melvin, ger over here! (A guy appears in his front) No. No. Hideous. I want to die. Eww. Oh, yes. That's the one.
Vix: Well, looks like you have everything under control here.
Veener: Of course I do. Fuck you. Now shoo! Take care of the piss baby.
(Vix walks away, and two moth men open a door for her and she enters in Valentina's penthouse and see the demon surrounded by red smoke at the sofa)
Valentina: Fucking finally! (Throws a glass on the floor) Kin, another drink. Can you believe what that piece of shit did? The ungrateful whore! (Throws the other glass and almost hits Vix)
Vix: Um, which whore are we talking about this time?
Valentina: Fucking Angela Dust. Who the hell else would I be talking about? That fucking slut walked out on me. Me. I fucking made her. Without me, she's just a bag of meat with some middly entairtainig holes.
Vix: Angela quit?
Valentina: No, she didn't fucking quit! It's worse. (Gets Vix's phone and throws at the wall) She moved! Seh thinks she can just walk in here, work, and then go home somewhere else. Can you fucking believe that?! She thinks she can run off and shack up with Lucy's bimbo son?
Vix: Angela is living with Lucy's son now?
Valentina: Yeah, that fucker. Charlie or Charlotte, or...I don't know. Something girly like that. He's got that hotel and...(Shows a pair of guns) Which of these makes me look sexier?
Vix: (Chuckles) What are you doing, Tina? You're not going in there.
Valentina: That slippery twink is going to remember who owns her. I'm going to fuck everyone in that rancid shithole, I swear to God. (Vix grabs her)
Vix: (Shouts) Tina! (Chuckles) Think about it. Our brand is perfection. And what do you think chasing whored around town will do for our image?
Valentina: Uh...Fuck it up?
Vix: Right! Do you want people thinking you can't control your employees?
Valentina: No.
Vix: Exactly. And, hey, you still have her under contract. She isn't going anywhere. So you should...?
Valentina: Do nothing?
Vix: Great idea. Now, that's why they pay you the big bucks.
Valentina: (Sighs) But I really wanted to shoot someone. (Grabs her cigarrete and Vix lights it with her hand electricity)
Vix: Well, let me call up the lowest earners this month.
Valentina: Oh, you know me too well. (Chuckles darkly and drags on her cigarrete) You know, Angela isn't the only one spending time at this ratty hotel with Devil's Príncipe.
Vix: Oh, who else is there? Someone who owes you money?
Valentina: (Chuckles) Someone who owes us much more than money. The Radio Demon is there.
(Vix creeps electricity and she scratches a table)
Vix: (Chuckles) What did you just say?
Valentina: You heard me.
Vix: Alice came back and she is with Lucy's son, (Angrily) And wasn't the first fucking thing you told me?!
Valentina: Hey, killing Alice is your kink.
(They watch a video of Alice torturing Miss Pentious, in her airship, with giant tentacles and laughing)
Miss Pentious: Arrgh, Oh! Please! Stop!
Charles: Um, Alastor? I think she's had enough.
Angela: She's got a few more hits in her!
(Miss Pentious tries to grab the floor of the airship but she slippers and falls face on the ground)
Alice: Thanks for another forgetable experience.
(An egg falls near Charles)
Miss Pentious: Thank...You...For letting your guard down! (Rips Alice's coat) Haha! Yah! (Alice's shadow covers her) Oh, shit!
(A green smoke explosion send Miss Pentious flying)
Miss Pentious: Ahhhhhhhhhh!!!
Alice: Well, it looks as though I need a visit to the tailor. Best of luck, chums.
Vagner: Wait. You're leaving? Alice, we need youd help. We need you to do your job.
Angela: We need a wall.
Alice: Of course. Can't let my new project to fall into disrepair already. What would the paper say?
(Ghost construction workers appear from the ground and Angela pushes Vagner giggling and sides up to them)
Angela: Hey, sweet cheeks. What you doing later? I love a woman with a giant...Tool.
(Valentina watches from a tv)
Valentina: See? Look, at how she flirts with that girl. Annd she's not even paying. Who is that? I'm gonna fucking kill her whole fucking family. Vix? Vix?!
(Vix looks angrily at Alice from the tv)
Vix: That bitch is back!
Valentina: Yeah, I thought she was gone for good too.
Vix: It's been seven years!
Valentina: You still pissed she almost beat that time.
Vix: Uh, fuck you!
Valentina: Just saying.
Vix: Things have changed a lot since she left town.
Valentina: That's for sure.
Vix: I got send a message of who really is in charge of things now!
(Valentina laughs)
(At Vix's officer)
Vix: (Singing) Welcome home! I'm gonna make you wish that you'd stayed gone. Say hello to a new status quo. Everyone knows that there's a brand-new dawn. Turn the TV on! (Camera speeds, rollin' in three, two) Top of the hour, and we're discussing a certain has-been who has been spotted cavorting around town (welcome to the show) After a seven-year absence. Did anybody miss her? (Welcome to the show) Did anybody notice? More on tonight's program. So, the radio demon is back in town. Why is she hanging around? What does that mean for your family? Well handily, I've got good news. She's a loser, a fossil and I don't mean to sound hostile, but the demon is a coward! You can take that as gospel. Pulling my viewers? Impossible! I'm visual, she's barely audible. Stop givin' her the time of day. Don't listen to a word she'd say. I hope he had a nice vacay, but she should've stayed away. While she hid in radio we pivoted to video. Now her medium is gettin' bloody rare. Hell's been better since she split. Where's she been? Who gives a shit!
Alice: (Singing) Salutations! Good to be back on the air.Yes, I know it's been a while since someone with style treated hell to a broadcast! Sinners, rejoice!
Vix: What a dated voice.
Alice: Instead of a clout-chasin' mediocre video podcast.
Vix: Come on!
Alice: Is Vix insecure? Pursuing allure? Flitting between this fad and that, is nothin' working?
Vix: Ignore her chirping!
Alice: Every day, she's got a new format!
Vix: You're lookin' at the future, she's the shit that comes before that!
Alice: Is Vix as strong as she purports or is it based on her support? She'd be powerless without the other Vees!
Vix: Oh, please!
Alice: And here's the sugar on the cream: she asked me join her team!
Vix: Hold on!
Alice: I said no and now she's pissy. That's the tea.
Vix: (Buffering) You old-timey prick. I'll show you suffering!
Alice: Uh-oh, the tv is buffering!
Vix: I'll destroy you, you little...
(The lights on the whole town turn off)
Alice: I'm afraid you've lost your signal!
(At Alice's radio tower in the hotel)
Alice: Let's begin! I'm gonna make you wish that I'd stayed gone! Tune on in! When I'm done, your status quo will know its race is run! Oh, this will be fun!
(Vix sees Alice's silhouette from the tvs and the Radio Demon laughs)
Vix: Fuck!
(At a room, the Vees are reunited around a table with Kin serving drinks to them)
Vix: We have a problem. Alice is getting close to little Prince Morningstar. So our main concern now is ensuring that no deal is never struck with Lucy's brat and that smilling freak.
Veener: Well, how, exactly, are we suppose to stop it?
Valentina: Put something inside them. That's how I get the bitches to behave!
Vix: Well, maybe someone in the inside isn't such a bad idea. Do you think Angela would?
Valentina: Pft. That lanky prick won't even return my calls.
Vix: We need someone who Mister Bleeding-Heart would take in.
Veener: Someone pathetic, desparate, with no direct ties to us.
Valentina: I employ every down on their lucky loser this side of Hell. Who the fuck is left?
Vix: (Scoffs) I think I have just the one.
(Back to the hotel, Charles throws himself face down on one of the sofas)
Charles: (Exhausted) Hmmph!
Angela: So, how'd it go?
Vagner: (Sighs) Not a sigle new recruit.
Angela: Yeah. Well, who would to use their last days not fucking or fighting?
(Someone bangs at the door, Vagner goes to it and see Miss Pentious holding her hat)
Miss Pentious: Why, hello, my dar...(Vagner punches her and points a spear at her) Wait wait wait! (Fells on the ground and stands up her pointing the weapon) I come in peace.
Vagner: What are you doing here?
Charles: Vagner, what's the problme? (Gasps) Oh, hello again.
(Vagner gets out of MA'AM Pentious and she stands up)
Miss Pentious: I didn't come looking for a fight. I, uhhh...I heard that you're helping people. People who want to be better?
Charles: (Gasps) You heard right! Welcome to our home of healing, our resort of restoration, our...
Angela: Are you fucking nuts? This bitch was trying to kill us, like, literally six hours ago. And now you want to bring her in here to live with us?
Charles: Of course! This place is about second chances. And who deserves one more this slithering...slippery...special little woman?
Angela: (To Vagner) Aren't you supposed to protect this place?
(Charles does a puppy face to Vagner)
Vagner: (Sighs) I...Guess she's not much of a threat without the war machine.
(Miss Pentious smiles)
Vagner: Or even with the war machine.
(Miss Pentious' smile faits and Charles hugs Vagner spinning)
Charles: Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you! Miss Pentious, welcome to Hazbin Hotel! (Walks away)
Miss Pentious: Oh, no, darling. Thank you. You won't regret this. (Enters the hotel)
Angela: Eh, I give you a week. Tops. (Enters the hotel)
(Inside, Hisky drinks at the bar)
Charles: So...this is bar and the bartender. This is the curtain, and this is the new wall after you broke the last one, heh, and, oh, this, this is...(Vagner holds him)
Vagner: Babe, you don't have to show her every detail.
Charles: Sorry, I'm just so excited to have our first real guest!
Angela: Uh, what the hell am I then?
Charles: Well, you're an important part of our family here, Angela. But you, um, uh...
Vagner: Constantly make us look bad, sexually harass the staff, and have literally never once tried to improve?
Charles: What he means is, it's just nice to have someone interested for once.
(Angela lowers her head as Charles enters the lobby)
Charles: Over here, we have our housekeeper, Niffter.
Niffter: (Gasps) The bad girl is back! (Jumps on Miss Pentious) Never leave me again!
Charles: We're about eighthy percent sure he's harmless. And over here we have...(Sees Alice) Oh, uh, Alice, our gracious Facility Manager! You've met our newest guest, Miss Pentious...Heh heh.
Alice: Ah, yes. You're yhe one who ruined my coat. (Sinisterly) I definitely remember you now.
(Miss Pentious gulps nervously)
Charles: Well, I guess this is a great time for your first lesson: (Clears throat) "How to apologize". The first step to becoming a better person is to admit when you're wrong. Why don't you give it a try?
Miss Pentious: Yes, um...Mrs, um, Radio Demon, ma'am, please forgive me for attacking you and ruining your very lovely coat...Um, here...(Hands Alice's coat scrap she take off to herself)
Alice: Oh-ho, not many people have been able to take even this much off me. It must have meant quite a lot for you. (Combusts the piece of the coat into green flames)
(At the lobby)
Charles: Now! With a new resident, I think it's important that we all get to know each other, so we are going to play a little game. Everyone, follow me. My name is Charles. (Claps) I like to sing. (Claps) And when we get to know each other, it's the greatest thing. (Claps and turns to Miss Pentious)
Miss Pentious: My name is Miss Pentious. (Claps) I like to build. (Claps) And despite my stupid Egg Girls, I think I'm very skilled. (Claps)
(Charles and Miss Pentious turn to Angela)
Angela: This is stupid.
Charles: This is not stupid! (Claps) It's just a game! (Claps) Ma'am Pentious did it well and now you have to do same! (Claps)
Angela: I am too sober for this.
Vagner: Well, get used to it and learn how to play. This is gonna be your whole day. (Claps)
(Later, Angela reads a script wearing a trenchcoat and a hat)
Angela: "Oh, I'm a bad man kn the streets who never got enough hugs. Now, where is an innocent kid I can sell crack to?". Wow! Who wrote this?
Charles: Is great, right? Keep going.
Angela: "Hey you."
Miss Pentious: Who, me?
Angela: "Yeah, you look just like a kid who could use some devil's dandruff."? Oh, for fuck's sake!
Miss Pentious: Not me. I have to go home and study.
Angela: "Come on kid, it will make you cool like me...The crack head!"
Miss Pentious: The only cool thing here is to say no to drugs. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to not have sexual intercourse before marriage!
Charles: Yes! Oh, bravo, bravo! Wow, Pentious, at this rate you'll be redeemed in no time.
(Angela hangs her head)
Angela: I...I'm going to bed. (Walks away and stop in one of the stairs steps)
Angela: I am so proud of you, Ma'am Pentious. That was amazing. That was beautiful work!
Miss Pentious: Thank you. Thank you. You like me. You really like me!
(Angel heads upstairs, in her room, she throws the trenchcoat in her pet pig and flops in bed with her phone and plays voice messages from Valentina)
(Voicemail beeps)
Valentina: (In voicemail) Angela, baby, come home. It's not the same without you here. I miss you, vome back. (Shouting) Angela you bitch, if you don't come home, you will fucking greasy truckers for the next year...(In another voicemail) Hey, amorcita, I didn't mean to yell, but you know how crazy you make me f...You fucking slut! (Friendly) Hey, Angie, about earlier...Kill your whole fucking fam...Work's really stressful...Little cocksucking piece of shit...You actually think you can change? Addict trash like you doesn't change. I'll see you soon, baby.
(A red smoke from Angela's phone and surrounds him)
Angela: Sorry. Not now, Fat Nuggets. (Leaves her pig in the bed and leaves the room, she's seem grabbing a bottle at the bar and drinks it while walking) Ahh...
(A sillouette disappears in other room, following it, Angela looks through a door and see Miss Pentious putting a camera between some books and opens the doors)
Angela: You slippery little shit!
(Miss Pentious screams)
Angela: You're working for the Vees? I fucking knew there was something shitty about you.
Miss Pentious: I don't know what you're talking about...Whorebug!
(Angela knocks Miss Pentious down and starts punching her in the face, they both roll on the floor and she is left holding the snake woman)
Miss Pentious: Get your aggressively average body, off of me! (Hipnotizes Angela who backs up)
Angela: Fuck! (Shakes the hipnoze off) (Growls)
(Vagner and Charles show up with their pajamas)
Charles: (Yawn) What's going on?
Angela: This little bitch is a traitor!
Miss Pentious: Preposterous, I would never betray you. You...Are my best friends! (Hugs Vagner and Charles)
Angela: Uh-uh. Then explain this. (Show the camera between the books on the shelf)
Miss Pentious: Ah! Ah! Abort! Abort! S.O.S. Angent Pentious in need of immediat evacuation!
(Pentious' watch shows Vix)
Vix: Pentious?...Wait...You were caught?! (Laughing) It hasn't even been a day!
Miss Pentious: Please, you got to get me put of here!
Vix: I can't believe we thought you could handle even something this simple. Do us a favor, if they don't kill you, go ahead and do it yourself, you miserable failure!
Miss Pentious: (Crying) I...I...Just make it quick, I guess. (Take off her watch and lie down on the floor) Not that I deserve it.
Vagner: Gladly.
Charles: Wait. (Stands her hand) Pentious?
(Pentious raises her head)
Charles: (Singing) It starts with sorry! (Pentious washes her tears away) Charles: That's your foot in the door. One simple sorry. (Puts his hand in her chest) Spoken straigbt from your core. The path to forgivness is a twisting trail of hearts, but sorry is where it starts!
Miss Pentious: (Singing) Who could forgive a dirtbag like me? I don't deserve your amnesty!
Vagner and Angela: (Singing) Can't we just kill her? Shoot her and spill her blood?
Charles: That's an option you could choose.
Vagner and Angela: Works for us!
Charles: But who hasn't been in her shoes? It starsts with (Pulls Miss Pentious) sorry!
Miss Pentious: Sorry!
Charles: Dig down deeper and say one sincere sorry!
Miss Pentious: I'm so sorry!
Charles: And your journey's underway!
Charles and Miss Pentious: It'll take time to cover youmy vast multitude of sins! But sorry is where it begins!
(Fireworks explode Miss Pentious' old sins)
Miss Pentious and Charles: It starts with sorry!
(Niffter is seem at the door)
Niffter: I hated that song! Why are you so lame? (Kicks Miss Pentious) You're not a bad girl! (Walks away angry)
Charles: (Sighs) Good first day. Let's get some rest.
(Everyone walk out of the room, but Alice's teeth and eyes glow in the dark, she enters the room and gets the watcher)
Vix: What?!
Alice: You'll have to try harder then that next time, old pal! (Breaks the watcher)
(Vix screams distorted and Alice laughs diabolically and leaves the room)
(The ending credits start playing)

Contest Rules For Best Song Of The Month • Updated May 19th, 2024

Click here to see summary of changes.

Best Song Of The Month Contest

Music Or Lose It hosts a monthly Best Song Of The Month contest at this musicorloseittv subreddit community. There is no cash or monetary value prize at this time. This contest is simply just for fun. Winners earn the enjoyment of being voted the best. Winners may cite the win in their biographies and social media posts.
The moderator (mod) is available to help music creators with the entry process, eligibility requirements, and deadlines. Music creators are allowed to contact the mod to ask questions about the contest anytime and mod will reply as soon as possible.
Definitions
Music creator: refers to a solo creator, band, group, choir, orchestra, or duo.
Brand identity: refers to how a creator presents themselves as an entertainer making music for the general public. For example, Simon & Garfunkel as a duo is one brand identity. Paul Simon solo is another brand identity.

Process & Deadlines

🟡 Round 1
1) Discovery ◦ Each month, moderator keeps track of songs shared at this musicorloseittv community.
2) Notifying Music Creators ◦ When a likely eligible song is seen, the u/musicorloseittv profile or u/themusicfanman profile will notify the music creator of likely eligibility within the qualifying song’s post. The reply will indicate, “⏳ This song appears eligible for the Best Song Of The Month contest. Please provide the following information…” If the song is confirmed to be eligible by a mod, the mod will make a reply “🟨 This is confirmation notifying you that this song is eligible and in consideration for the Best Song Of The Month contest…” within the qualifying song’s post.
3) Determining Contestants ◦ The Music Fan man will evaluate all eligible songs by the month’s eligibility deadline. He will then at his discretion choose up to 5 songs to compete.
3) Finalists Post ◦ At this musicorloseittv community, the musicorloseittv profile will announce the top finalists (up to 5) in a post tiled “Contest: Best Song Of The Month Finalists (Insert Month & Year).” This announcement will be done in a post made 4 days before the final day of the month. The post will be made sometime in the morning. The songs will be listed within the post in a manner most representative of music diversity as determined by the musicorloseittv profile mod. All songs available on YouTube will be included in a playlist titled “Best Song Of The Month Contestants • (Insert Month & Year)” hosted by the musicorloseittv channel on YouTube. Songs not available on YouTube will be excluded from the playlist. The playlist will be mentioned in this post. The available playlist will help voters get familiar with the songs.
The u/musicorloseittv profile or u/themusicfanman profile will notify the music creators of qualifying for the contest in their post of the song. The reply will indicate, “✅ Congratulations. Your song qualifies for the Best Song Of The Month contest…”
4) Voting ◦ The “Contest: Best Song Of The Month Finalists (Insert Month & Year)” post will specify a duration of 3 consecutive dates during which music fans can vote for only 1 of the top finalists. Voting occurs by the voters making a reply to the post in the following manner: “🗳️ I vote for….” Failing to vote in this manner will result in vote not being counted. To best ensure vote accuracy, voters must not use the “🗳️” emoji anywhere else in the post’s comments section. Music creators may vote for another music creator yet may not vote for themselves. For music creators, it’s “word of honor” voting. The top vote earning song within these three days will become the winner.
‣ Community moderator profiles musicorloseittv and onesongoftheday will abstain from voting. Also, themusicfanman and any special judge involved will also abstain from voting - unless they’re needed to serve as a tie breaker, in the event of a tie preventing a clear winner. If themusicfanman and any special judge involved are needed as a tie breaker, they must come to a consensus to achieve tie breaking. If no special judge is involved, then themusicfanman alone will serve as the tie breaker.
🟢 Winner Declaration!
Declaration Post ◦ At this musicorloseittv community, on the final day of the month, the musicorloseittv profile will announce the winner in a post tiled “Congratulations! 🎉 Best Song Of The Month Winner (Insert Month & Year)” in a post dedicated to celebrating the song. Using the sticky-post feature, the post will be prominently displayed the home page of the musicorloseittv subreddit community for ≈ 24 hours.
Achievement ◦ The contest winner may promote their song as:
My song “Song Title” won:
🏅Best Song Of The Month By Community Vote
(Insert Month & Year)
At The Music Or Lose It Community
The winner may promote themselves and the song as the winner at venues like X/Twitter, Facebook, Threads, or their YouTube channel’s Community feed. The winner may also cite the win in their biographies online including their personal website.
🏆 Song Of The Year
A similar Song Of The Year vote will occur in December. It will be similarly organized and scheduled to conclude on the final day of the year. To determine a Song Of The Year by the end of the year, December’s monthly contest will only be ≈ 2 weeks. Why? Because we need time to conclude The Song Of The Year vote by the end of the year. Additionally, this is a busy time of year for many people. What’s more, non-Christmas music released in December is typically overshadowed by Christmas music. It seems to be a bad idea to release new-original music in late December. See opinion commentary: The Best And Worst Months To Release Music.
Achievement ◦ The contest winner may promote their song as:
🏆 Best Song Of The Year By Community Vote
(Insert Year)
At The Music Or Lose It Community
The winner may promote themselves and the song as the winner at venues like X/Twitter, Facebook, Threads, or their YouTube channel’s Community feed. The winner may also cite the win in their biographies online including their personal website.

Eligibility

Here are the rules for the Best Song Of The Month contest organized by Music Or Lose It just for fun. The eligibility rules are intended to make this contest as fair as possible to the music creator participants.
**👤 Personal: **
Requirements:
✔️ Must be an actual human.
✔️ Must be 17 years of age or older.
✔️ Must be a music creator abiding by the rules of this musicorloseittv subreddit community.
✔️ Must be a music creator posting using either your personal profile or your brand profile as a music entertainer.
Ineligible:
🚫 Profiles run by publicists, music labels, or channels hosting performers.
🚫 People posing as other humans using imitation avatar type creations by artificial intelligence (AI).
**🗿 Music creator’s stature status: **
Eligible:
✔️ Unsigned amateur or unsigned professional yet lesser known.
✔️ Lesser known music creators who have not yet achieved two different songs with over 500,000 views/listens and are signed to deals with small to medium-sized record companies or seeming one-song-per-time type distributors.
✔️ Lesser known music creators who have not yet achieved two different songs with over 500,000 views/listens and are signed to deals with to a major label.
**📅 Release date: **
Eligible:
✔️ Your song must be published and accessible to the masses anytime between November 15^th of the prior year and 5 days before the final day of the current month.
**💽 Songwriting, singing, & recording: **
Requirements:
✔️ You must be the copyright owner of the song (lyrics and sound recording) or authorized/licensed to perform the song by the copyright owner as the first original performer.
✔️ An exception is made if your song is an authorized/licensed remix or includes authorized/licensed interpolation or sampling content by the copyright owner in collaboration with any other amateur music creator(s) or unsigned professional yet lesser known music creator(s). The aforementioned release date also applies to any remix, interpolation, or sampling content.
✔️ Collaborations within the aforementioned rules are allowed so long as the song is entered into the contest by the lead. Lead refers to the first person named in the collaboration.
Ineligible:
🚫 Copyright/trademark violations.
🚫 Songs written by artificial intelligence (AI).
🚫 Songs primarily generated artificial intelligence (AI).
🚫 Cover, parody, nor artificial intelligence (AI) imitation.
🚫 Songs likely to be very divisive for political or religious/anti-religious reasons.
🚫 Collaborations within deceased music creators akin to “Unforgettable” by Natalie Cole featuring Nat "King" Cole.
🚫 Interpolations, remixes, or samplings of a song by a creator signed to a record company of any size or signed to a one-song-per-time type distributor.
🚫 Song with hard cussing. No variations of F word, S word, C word, D word, N word (er or a), ahole word(s), or sexually vulgar words.
🚫 Extremely sexual, gang promoting, violent, or especially scary/gory/maleficent/evil aesthetic content.
🚫 Songs primarily about brands. For example: “I Love Driving Such-And-Such Brand Name Trucks.”
**👂 Recording quality: **
Allowed:
✔️ Professional quality recordings (live or studio).
✔️ Amateur quality (including songs record in a bedroom, car, outdoors, etc…) yet reasonably pleasant sounding.
✔️ Demos are welcome.
Ineligible:
🚫 Live records with too much interfering audience noise.
🚫 Recordings with excessively poor sound quality (abrasive on the ears, difficult to hear).
**📏 Song length: **
Requirement:
✔️ Minimum of 01:15 minutes up to 10:00 minutes.
**💻 Distribution venues: **
Requirements:
✔️ A song published and accessible to the general public masses at a well-known music website such as YouTube, SoundCloud, or Bandcamp.
✔️ A song uploaded to a channel hosting live performances is allowed so long as the song is entered into the contest directly by the creator and so long as the creator confirms permission by the channel. Confirmation can be done in either your original upload URL link source or at this community within your posts’ body-text section or a reply to the post.
✔️ The song’s upload date must be visible at the distribution venue website.
⚠️ If you enter this contest with a Spotify or TikTok URL link, ensure you’ve provided a link for the entire song (not a teasesampler) in a manner that does not require login; ensure the publish date is visible; and be weary of looping flashing visuals necessitating a “⚠️Possible Seizure Trigger Risk Warning.” Failing to do this will result in ineligibility.
Ineligible:
🚫 Login required to access the song.
🚫 Payment required to access the song.
🚫 Uploads of songs directly to Reddit.
🚫 Links not fully available to the public such as an “unlisted” YouTube video.
**🖼️ Song’s artwork: **
Definition: artwork refers to the image/drawing/photo/visuals accompanying your individual song at a music distribution venue such as YouTube, SoundCloud, or Bandcamp. It is sometimes referred to as “cover art.”
Requirements:
✔️ You must be the original creator of the song’s accompanying artwork.
✔️ Alternatively, you must be the copyright owner of the artwork if you paid to have it made. Otherwise you must be authorized/licensed to publish the artwork as part of the presentation of your song.
✔️ Artwork primarily generated by artificial intelligence (AI) is allowed so long as you are authorized/licensed by the AI source to publish the artwork as part of your song’s public presentation. However this is advised against because public sentiment may be hostile towards AI generated content.
✔️ If your song’s artwork uses aspects of copyrighted, creative commons, or “free” material content, you must confirm you’ve got authorization/licensing to use the content as part of your song’s public presentation. Confirmation can be done in either your original upload URL link source or at this community within your posts’ body-text section or a reply to the post.
✔️ Your own logo that you own the copyright to may be displayed in the song’s accompanying artwork (including on a person wearing a hat or T-shirt).
Ineligible:
🚫 Copyright/trademark violations.
🚫 Parody notably displayed in the artwork.
🚫 Visible logos of any brand other than your own logo as a music entertainer.
🚫 Extremely sexual, gang promoting, violent, or especially scary/gory/maleficent/evil aesthetic content.
**🎥 Song’s music video (optional): **
Including a link to a music video is optional.
Requirements:
✔️ You must be the original creator of the song’s music video visuals including: animation; moving graphics; prominently featured still artwork or photos.
✔️ Alternatively, you must be the copyright owner of all the video’s visuals if you paid to have them made. Otherwise you must be authorized/licensed to publish all the video’s visuals as part of the presentation of your song’s accompanying music video.
✔️ Visuals (including: animation; moving graphics; prominently featured still artwork or photos) primarily generated by artificial intelligence (AI) are allowed so long as you are authorized/licensed by the AI source to publish the artwork as part of your song’s public presentation. However this is advised against because public sentiment may be hostile towards AI generated content.
✔️ If your song’s accompanying music video uses aspects of copyrighted, creative commons or “free” material, you must confirm you’ve got authorization/licensing to use the copyrighted material as part of your song’s public presentation within the accompanying music video. Confirmation can be done in either your original upload URL link source or at this community within your posts’ body-text section or a reply to the post.
✔️ Your own logo that you own the copyright to may be displayed in the video (including on a person wearing a hat or T-shirt).
✔️ Allowed music videos include “Official Music Video,” “Live Performance,” “Dance Video Version,” “Animated Video,” or “Lyrics Video.”
✔️ If you opt for an “Animated Video” or a “Lyrics Video,” you must be authorized/licensed to publish all the video’s visuals as part of the presentation of your song’s accompanying music video. If you hire an animator or use AI or an app/software designed to create music video lyrics, you must be authorized/licensed by the animator or AI source or app/software creator to publish the animation and/or lyrics as part of the presentation of your song’s accompanying music video.
✔️ If you opt for a “Dance Video Version,” the dancing and/or choreography must be originally created for your song’s accompanying music video. If you hire a choreographer and/or dancers or collaborate for free or for barter, you must be authorized/licensed by the choreographer and/or dancers to publish the video’s dancing/choreography visuals as part of the presentation of your song’s accompanying music video.
✔️ “Official Audio” type music videos are allowed so long as an accompanying still image complies with the aforementioned “Song’s artwork” rules. Alternatively, if the “Official Audio” music videos has moving visuals, it must comply with these above-mentioned “Song’s music video” rules.
✔️ “Live Performance” music videos may be made from your home/cafield (pretty much anywhere decent and reasonable) or from one of your well-recorded performances from a show. Be sure to avoid copyright and trademark violations in the video.
⚠️ Brief uses of music distribution venue logos at the end or start of a music video may be allowed at mod’s discretion, when the intent is to inform the viewer of venue availability of the song. This is however discouraged unless the distribution venue, at their website, specifies this is allowed. Music videos that display any trademark logos (other than the music creator’s own copyrighted logo) entirely throughout are ineligible.
Ineligible:
🚫 Copyright/trademark violations.
🚫 Notable use of virtual reality program recordings.
🚫 Notable use of filters from apps/websites similar to Snapchat.
🚫 Parody of intellectual property characters prominently displayed in the video.
🚫 Notably visible logos of any brand other than your own logo as a music entertainer.
🚫 Notable display of brand products with visible logos including but not limited to toys, stuffed animals, autos, hats, T-Shirts.
🚫 Extremely sexual, gang promoting, violent, or especially scary/gory/maleficent/evil aesthetic content.
🚫 Limitations on involving minors (under 18 yo): no minors doing dangerous stunts; no depictions of minors participating in drugs/drinking/smoking or very sexual behavior (including sexual dancing); do not prominently feature children that are not your own in the video (exception may be made if a relative only allows you to involve their children).
⚖️ Quantities:
Requirements:
✔️ One song per music creator’s brand identity.
✔️ If a music creator uploads more than one of their brands’ potentially eligible songs, the music creator must inform mod which song they prefer to be included in the contest.
✔️ A music creator may win this Song Of The Month contest up to three consecutive times. If this happens, thereafter the creator must abstain from the contest for the next month and then may return to the contest after that 1-month eligibility hiatus.
Ineligible:
🚫 Every collaboration will not automatically be considered a new brand. For example, Robert Plant and Alison Krauss collaborating one time should not be considered a brand. Robert Plant & Alison Krauss making an entire album together should be considered a brand. Music creators attempting to enter multiple songs under multiple brand names will be scrutinized. If there is no social media presence for any additional brands, their songs will likely be rejected as “also eligible” by mods. If this happens, the music creator will have to enter only 1 song.
**🖱️ Accounts you may post from: **
Requirements:
✔️ Your post must be made directly from either your personal Reddit account profile or your brand’s Reddit account profile.
✔️ If you have a medical condition necessitating aid, on your behalf, you may appoint a publicist, manager, caretaker, helper, spouse, partner, friend, guardian, or family member to post from either your personal Reddit account profile or your brand’s Reddit account profile.
✔️ If your song is from a band, group, choir, orchestra, or duo brand, the post must be made directly from either from one of the members’ personal Reddit account profiles or from your brand’s Reddit account profile.
✔️ If your song is collaboration, the post must be made directly from either the lead’s personal Reddit account profile or from the lead’s brand Reddit account profile.
✔️ If you want another song to be a part of the contest from another brand identity you are involved with, the song must be posted by a Reddit account profile for that separate brand – or one of the brand collaborators’ personal Reddit account profile.
👩🏾‍🏫 Presentation at this musicorloseittv community:
Requirements:
✔️ You must post a link to the song at this musicorloseittv community by tapping “+” on smartphone or clicking “+Create a post” on desktop/laptop. You must select the “My Song” flair.
✔️ Your post must be done by the “Title & Link Share Only method.”
✔️ The song’s URL you provide must be of the standalone song upload - not part of a playlist URL link.
✔️ You may post an audio only upload URL link (such as an individual song published at SoundCloud or Bandcamp). Alternatively, you may post a music video link from a venue like YouTube.
✔️ You may include a smartlink for the individual song (not album or playlist) within your posts’ body-text section or a reply to the post.
✔️ You may title the post whatever you want within the community’s rules and the contest’s rules. Remember: no vague titles; limit post title emojis to no more than 2 (if you decide to use them); and don’t request feedback.
✔️ Your post title may be done in the style of “Entertainer - Song Tile” (or something similar). Alternatively, the post title may be more elaborate. For example: “This Is My Latest Song. It’s About A Wonderful Time I Fell In Love.”
✔️ In your posts’ body-text section or in a reply comment, optionally you may share details about the song that you feel the audience would enjoy knowing.
**📝 Needed information: **
Requirements:
✔️ Within either your posts’ body-text section or within a reply comment at your post, provide the following information – as is:
❇️ Contest entry for your consideration:
• Entertainer's Name - Song Title:
• Published on: [Insert date & year. Refers to date published at your URL link source]
• Genre:
• I am an independent creator unsigned I am signed to [insert label name]
• Interpolations/remixes/samplings disclosure: N/A this song contains authorized/licensed interpolations/remixes/samplings [specify] of another song released since 11/15 of the prior year in collaboration with other unsigned music creator(s)[specify]. The link to the original song is [insert URL link – publish date from URL link source must be visible].
• Al disclosure: N/A. A portion of this [song/artwork/music video] is created by Al. Explanation: [specify if this applies to song/artwork/music video].
• Copyright disclosure for song: I confirm I’m the copyright owner of all the contents of this song (lyrics and recording) as it is presented including the artwork [(if applicable) and music video]
Copyrighted content I am authorized/licensed to use commercially in the promotion of my song include: [insert details]
• [optional/voluntary] Confirmation of substantial human involvement: A real human substantially arranged/compose this music. [Note: This type disclosure is strongly encouraged by creators who use instrument sounds and beats from apps/software in substation of instruments played live at the time of recording. This is especially encouraged for music creators who do not show their face and/or don’t show themselves creating the music in a music video or behind the scenes video. For music fans opposed to music primarily created by AI, this type of disclosure can be helpful and assuring.]
• Lyrics: [insert URL link or embed URL link into “Lyrics” text] [note if the lyrics are available at the upload source] [only if you're the copyright owner of the lyrics, you may entirely include them] [type “vocalized” or “instrumental” if applicable]
Ineligible:
🚫 Uploads of songs to Reddit.
🚫 No engagement pleas disguised as feedback requests in post titles nor in your posts’ body-text section. No feedback requests.
**👨🏼‍⚖️ Copyright/trademark compliance: **
‣ Important note: Aforementioned rules already state you either must be the copyright owner of the content you enter for this contest or you must be authorized/licensed to commercially use the content by the copyright owner. Aforementioned rules already state you must disclose use of copyrighted, creative commons, or “free” material. Mods reserve the right to ask for additional proof for confirmation. Suspected violations will be removed at mod’s discretion. You are strongly encouraged to upload your best, newest, utmost original content.
‣ Resources:
U.S. Copyright Office, Copyright in General https://www.copyright.gov/help/faq/faq-general.html
What Musicians Should Know about Copyright by U.S. Copyright Office https://www.copyright.gov/engage/musicians
U.S. Copyright Office Fair Use Index by U.S. Copyright Office https://www.copyright.gov/fair-use
**🤝 Mutual Support **
Requirements:
✔️ You must be active in the musicorloseittv community regarding mutual support and engagement with other posts. You must post a comment reply to at least two other posts of any kind at the musicorloseittv community before the final day of the month. Failing to do so will result in disqualification.
Ineligible:
🚫 Posting then ghosting the community.
**😎👍 Encouraging fans to vote: **
Ineligible:
🚫 You are not allowed to ask for votes in anywhere in the musicorloseittv community’s comments section.
🚫 Music creators may not offer anything to anyone whatsoever in exchange for voting for them.
Allowed:
✔️ If you see a music fan has voted for you, you may thank them in a reply comment.
✔️ You may make social media posts at venues like X/Twitter, Facebook, Threads or your YouTube channel’s Community feed to encourage your fans to join this musicorloseittv subreddit community and vote for your song.
Example post:
My song “Song Title” is a finalist for Best Song Of The Month at the musicorloseittv community at Reddit. At [insert URL link] please vote for me and my song. Thank you.
**📜 Rules adherence: **
‣ Important note: If you are new to the musicorloseittv community as either a music fan voting or music creator entering the contest, latitude may be given as you get familiar here. It’s up to mod’s discretion.
‣ Important note: This contest is just for fun. Likewise playing boardgames or cards with friends is also just for fun yet people expect rules to be followed.
**🕊️ Truthfulness: **
Requirements:
✔️ Contestants and voters are expected to behave honorably and ethically.
Ineligible:
🚫 If anyone is ever discovered cheating or being dishonest akin to author James Frey or music entertainers Milli Vanilli, they will be disqualified and also likely be banned from this community.
Additional Info
If you do not want to be in the contest yet want to continue sharing your songs in this community, it is totally ok. Please inform the moderator. A “Message the mods” option is at the homepage.
In circumstances where uncertainty arises due to an unforeseen issue not addressed here in this outline of rules, moderators reserve the right to approve or disapprove eligibility. Moderators reserve the right to disqualify any song for any reason. Unfortunately, not every contest can perfectly satisfy all participant hopefuls.
Just do your best, don’t take it too seriously, and have fun.
Thank you.
END

[ First / Previous / Next ]
Memory Transcription Subject: Hileen, Krakotl Fugitive Recovery Agent
Date [standardized human time]: November 28th, 2136
It'd been a while since I sat in Marlig's office for a talk face-to-face. Given the agency's secluded location at the edge of the downtown region, it was a chore to drop by when it wasn't for business, but I'd deemed the matter at hand to be worth my time.
I passed by Nampi at her desk on my way to the door and she gave me a coy glare as I carried on. Trying to ignore her risible ear waggle, I turned the corner to the door with my boss’s name painted on the glass panel where I could hear the frantic crumpling of paper.
Quietly, I entered Marlig's office without prompt as I knew he hated to be spooked by knocking. My mentor was surprisingly spry for a bird at his age, sorting through papers with one wing and an eye while using his talons with the other to set away the papers he had splayed out.
“Hileen!” he chirped. “Glad you could make it in today. I was just finishing up my paperwork. Take a seat.”
It was always nice to hear him drop the professional motif for a more grandfatherly attitude when speaking in person. I did as he suggested and took a seat while he grumbled to himself over the sorting. My eye caught a few of the old contracts he was rifling through and saw that some dated back to his days as an agent.
Eventually, he left some sitting out as he sequestered the rest back into their files, sorted by a dichotomy that only he and Nampi could comprehend fully. He motioned with a wing for me to peruse and I turned the first one to face me to find it was my first contract, signed by me in a sloppy fashion. “This takes me back a couple of years.”
“Slick bastard thought he could get away on a forklift but you showed him! Certainly more exciting than my first day!”
“Mm-hmm. And it was when I nearly got impaled that you had the idea to commission all of us utility vests.”
He chuckled, “I really should’ve done so sooner. Cuts and scratches were already a risk, but a forklift was a new one!”
I flipped through the pages of each report, finding that Marlig's notes were filled with praises of my work. There were highs and lows, but I was flattered to find that the grizzled krakotl held my performance in such high regard.
“Flawless interception!” read one footnote about me catching a runner. “Couldn't have done it better myself!”
Marlig waited patiently as I browsed quickly through each page, realizing more and more how the notes also marked improvements in my work. How I found it easier to talk down a rowdy client, or apprehend them in the case that they were beyond helping on my part. Flowery language plastered most pages with him fawning over my work as a doting father would to his prodigal child.
The trend took a sharp turn as the notes became fewer and more critical the closer the dates reached to the present. I brushed the others aside with a wing to peruse the final paper. “And this…”
“Is Tac. Your latest contract. The most recent in a line of declining performance since the interview. This has become a pattern, Hileen, and its consequences are beginning to reach beyond yourself. Paji and Vesek resigned recently for personal reasons, which leaves us even less hands on deck than before. That's four people to cover the entire municipal region, and maybe even beyond, should needs arise. Three, if we include this little probation I have you on.”
“What was I supposed to do? Marlig, these ‘jobs’ you've got us working on overstep the contracts we were signed on with. Our job is to make sure people obey their court-mandated duties, not drag them off to the facilities ourselves!”
“... So the trip we took to the facilities did bother you.”
A sigh clicked in my throat as he reminded me. “Is that what happens to the people we take in, Marlig? Is that what would've happened to your wife?”
His feathers ruffled.
“That's what happens to those who are too dangerous to the general public to be left roaming free. Not everyone we deal with winds up there, but everyone can be subject to it. Miskela sued for her exoneration and proved in court that she was not diseased. I brought you there to show you how it helps the people, but I see now that it was a mistake. I understand why you were so perturbed, really, but it's how things have been for centuries. It's how we've protected ourselves from the dangers out there.”
“You were willing to let Barsul be interned there, too.”
Marlig flinched and sighed as he swept the papers towards himself once I'd signaled I was done. He turned one eye to me while he sorted them.
“There's no room for favoritism, girl. I negotiated for him to be allowed to walk free, and look where that got me. That boy - your neighbor - suffered the consequences of my nepotism. So too would the girl, had nobody intervened.”
“Like Richard.”
“The human, yes. Or you. Or the police. Where does this sudden obsession with humans come from, anyway? I get notifications of you talking about the acceptance of them all the time on forums.”
“Does it even need explaining?”
“Well, I guess not, no, but it's certainly an about-face from the way you used to talk about them with me beforehand.”
“People can change, for better or worse. Which one I fall under remains to be seen.”
Marlig stroked at the plumage on his neck as he finished his sorting. “I hope it's the former, for your sake. Was there any reason you came to talk, or were you just checking that I hadn't gone senile?”
“Well, I was hoping to borrow your secretary for the evening.”
He perked up while his eyes narrowed and he laced his fingers together with curiosity. “You… want to spend an evening with Nampi?”
“It's not what you're insinuating, but yes.”
“I was insinuating nothing,” he warbled coyly. “Go ahead and take her, and make sure to split the bill at dinner.”
“Pain-in-the-ass geezer. I'll keep in touch if your friend causes any more trouble.”
“Keep in touch regardless. Miskela and I get lonely in our old age,” he called back. “Take care.”
I stepped out into the hallway and turned toward the desk where I could hear the secretary's claws tapping furtively at her keyboard. Nampi sat silently with her ears and tail in a relaxed position that implied a bored demeanor. There was barely any response as I stood before her, waiting politely for her acknowledgment that never came.
Hesitantly, I cleared my throat.
An ear raised in acknowledgement, but her focus remained on the screen of her computer. “Mhm?”
“Do you…?”
Her ear rotated toward me, though she still maintained a passive attitude as she continued to glare mindlessly at the monitor.
“Are you free this evening?”
“Well, I'm quite booked, I believe. Why do you ask?”
I was surprised at her curt, dry tone. She hadn't spoken with me like this since we first got to know one another.
“Well,” I started. “I realized something. Every time we went out, whether it was clubbing, or dinner, or even walking around the parks, you always footed the bill. And so…”
Slowly, her other ear perked up and I saw her keystrokes slow down as she listened in.
“I wanted to return the favor?”
Her lips smacked as she opened her mouth, though paused before she spoke. “How could you possibly do that?”
“With a little gesture of friendship.”
Nampi's horizontal pupil turned up toward me and her tail twitched.
I continued, “So that belt you're wearing? It's the same belt you've worn since we first met. And I know you're the pragmatic type who'd never spend a credit more than she needs to, except for all the times you do"- her ears twitched in indignance -"I wanted to see about getting you a little something… extra?”
Her paws raised from the keyboard and she leaned in, resting her snout on her palms. “Go on.”
The bubbly venlil's tail sold out her collected facade as it twitched with anticipation. She was cornered and she didn't even know it yet.
“Well, I found just the place on the other side of town where we can start. It's a place almost as rich and indulgent as yourself.”
“The Platinum Paw? I mean3”
Her ears folded back in embarrassment as she cracked. She wasn't cut out for acting anyway.
“So that's what it's called! Jeez, I couldn't for the life of me figure out what it was called. Now what do you say? We go over there and find you something nice—”
I hadn’t even finished my thought before Nampi had grabbed her bag and was out the door, giving me a playful tail flick that said come and get me.

The place I suggested was in a shopping center on the opposite side of town, though easily accessible because of its proximity to the transport rails. Nampi had insisted on grabbing something to eat beforehand and so now gleefully bit into a bundle of stalks that had been “grilled” as explained from the food truck we'd stopped at.
Her tail flicked back and forth with her usual enthusiasm as we entered the massive complex of stores. The roofless plan allowed the natural, orange sun to flood the upper levels while artificial lighting illuminated the ground level wherever the light couldn't reach.
The place was built in the last decade by the previous City Magister in a bid for popularity, though ultimately for naught as he would lose the vote following a scandal involving an iftali priestess and a carved bar of soap. I had to say that despite being sick in the head, he sure had a great sense of decor.
Nampi snacked away, joining me in admiring the scenery as we continued to the place I’d planned out for us. Aimless chatter all melded together into a single, thrumming murmur as pedestrians navigated the many levels and stores offered in the place.
A troupe of children passed by us, held in a chain of tails and arms as they were escorted by a pair of venlil who I assumed were students and teachers on a school trip. I caught a whiff of a sweet, aromatic breeze and found it to come from a perfume shop on the same level as us; naturally, venlil were not to be found inside.
We passed a fountain where a couple sat on the edge, their tails twined together as they giggled and flirted. I turned and caught Nampi watching them as well, though she awkwardly returned to sucking the remains of her meal from her claws when we made eye contact. Her ears lifted when I raised a wing to signal to the store we were going to stop at first.
“Platinum Paw, The Greatest Fashion Emporium For Everyone!”
The title alone was painfully cliche, taken to the tenth power by the brightly lit store taking up three department slots. Despite the flashy exterior, though, it was the best place to shop for belts, brooches, and bracelets alike. Customers who looked like they earned my yearly salary in a week browsed the higher end brands while I brought my friend to the section I wanted to show her.
Her ears were held up as we stood together next to a shelf chock full of fashionable bags and bandoliers of every variety.
“Pick one,” I told her.
Nampi's ears shot to a straight pose in surprise, “Any?”
“Within reason. I've got a few extra credits to blow and I know nobody better to spend it on.”
With an inviting headtilt, I let Nampi peruse the shelves at her leisure. Her lips pursed together and her tail flicked with glee as she fingered at every piece that caught her eye. I chuckled at her outburst of enthusiasm while turning to find my own items to gloss over.
A breeze from outside nipped at my beak while I considered what I’d like to purchase. The place dripped with an atmosphere of faux hospitality, from the bright blue-stained floorboards to the radio prattling off advertisements in a sickeningly sweet tone to the faint, fruity aroma of scented cleaner. It was oppressive as only a fissan-owned company could be to the senses.
What I wouldn’t pay to see how a human would fare in such an environment.
I knew they were social creatures at least, but I had no doubt that the predatory senses of a human, so honed to hunting, would get overstimulated in this center of gaudy indulgence. Knowing I was something of a predator myself made me sympathize provided that even I had to squint to keep the pale lights inside from searing my eyes. I could only imagine how the arboreal eyes of a Terran would fare. I was so lost in thought imagining how lost the Terrans would be that I could almost ignore the obnoxious giggling and metallic rattling coming from behind me.
Risking a peek at the source, into my sight came a pair of venlil, one a male carrying a pair of bags as well as a couple more strapped to his belt. The bored expression in his eyes was not one of a man who was in high spirits. The other venlil was a woman who was the source of the noise.
Her mottled gray pelt was accented by a tasteful belt design, free of almost any practical functions but not flashy or excessive in garnishment either. At least, that’s what I would say, were it not for the braid of beads that dangled on the belt, jingling with each bounce of the lively woman’s stride. It was clear that such a gaudy accessory was intended to draw attention to her, though why was a mystery. Certainly, the shiny braids seemed designed as decoration first and practical second.
She turned about and I faced back to my browsing before she could catch me staring. Nampi was nowhere in sight, though I figured she was somewhere behind the shelf, sifting through every accessory on the section I'd suggested.
Clink.
Something pelted to my immediate right. I tilted my head to spot a tree nut shell clattering to the floor. Without being able to guess where it came from, I had to wonder what could've launched it over this way. Even with my keen eyesight, nobody in the crowd seemed to be a suspect.
Clink.
Another shell pelted my vicinity, ricocheting off of the floor and hitting the shelf I was standing next to. I ruffled my feathers in frustration - clearly, someone was trying to get my attention, though I couldn't make out who it was. Out of the corner of my vision, the woman from before eyed me curiously as I looked about, though I wasn't interested in engaging with her.
Thwack.
One more shell came flying and, unfortunately, the aim on this one was true, nailing me on the beak. Irritated, I stormed out of the store to find the source of the instigator. I scanned over the bodies to find anyone who could've been responsible for this indignity, eventually concluding that it came from the dining area across the walkway.
Whoever was responsible was in for an earful and I was already structuring which of the offender's family members would be acceptable as fodder for stray words. As I approached, I found the tables were mostly empty save for one, which made my heart begin to drop as I met eyes with the only occupant. Suddenly, I was much less inclined to hurl insults.
“Oh, hi there!” Qitel called out in a sickly sweet tone. “Come, take a seat! We have much to discuss!”
The Exterminator clutched a bag of tree nuts in his claws, a pile of discarded shells already gathered on the table next to him. He grabbed another as I approached, effortlessly prying the shell in half between two claws and tossed the contents into his mouth. “Good protein, these,” he commented as I sat down.
“Must be for that good arm you've got there,” I mumbled. I caught sight of a couple of bags beneath his chair, seemingly from one of the tech stores contained within the center.
“Bah, it's guesswork. So how are you? I haven't heard from you since we worked together!”
“I was just spending time with a friend, shopping and enjoying my time off.”
“Your time off? Oh, am I interrupting something?”
His snide tone irked me, though now wasn’t the time for interjections. “You are, Qitel,” I replied with no shortage of vitriol in my tone. “But I see no harm in chatting for a bit.”
“Good, because I have some merchandise”- he reached into his belt pocket and deposited a couple of items onto the table -“and you’re just the person to look into it, human sympathizer.”
I drew a terse breath in shock, but my worries were quelled when I considered that if Qitel had the power to do anything about it, he would’ve done so instead of approaching me so discreetly. A glance down at the item on the table showed that he was presenting what looked to be a tracker as well as a personal drive. “Found in the garbage,” he told me.
“The guild resorts to dumpster diving when they already have such a bloated budget now?”
“No, featherbrain, I have decided to keep this for myself. These items were found together, sealed in a plastic pouch, and placed in a garbage bin. The city has bans against electronics being placed into public bins, and so I was curious why this wound up in there. Managed to get my coworker, a techie, to crack it open and…”
Qitel reached into his belt again, glowering at me with the same condescending gaze he’d given me when I first saw his face. He seemed to revel in digging for the item as slowly as possible to waste my time. Finally, he found whatever he was looking for and revealed it as a printed piece of paper, folded into eighths. The snobby yotul threw the unfurled paper on the table and rolled it toward me.
I craned my neck to look at the parchment, though I was immediately perplexed by the text on it; it appeared to be some sort of form, going by the boxes with words on the inside, followed by blank lines. “Found on the drive, here,” Qitel told me, jabbing a claw to the storage. “Translator shows it as Terran writing.”
Drawing my holopad from my satchel, I held it over the paper with the translator to get an understanding. Surely enough, the language on it came up positive as a variant of Terran writing and I was affirmed in it being a form of some sort based on the wording of the text. The boxes seemed like an odd sort of job application, asking for the typical name, contacts, and prior work experiences, but quickly took a strange turn as it began asking for where their home on Earth was prior to arrival, what family they had on Venlil Prime if any, and where they worked, implying that they were seeking individuals who were already employed.
I knew little about human employment methods, but I didn’t imagine that sourcing individuals from other jobs was the most efficient way to gain a workforce. Terran service industries already dotted the planet while many humans also found work in local environments. So what was the angle that the creator of this application was going for?
Most concerningly was that the paper had no insignia, identifying marks, or noted address to return the form to. “And where did you find it again?”
“In the garbage, alongside this intact tracker that was activated at the time of recovery. Y’know, when I was dumpster diving. Text on the document showed it was addressed to one ‘Choctaw Nexus’.”
“A pseudonym of some sort?”
“Clearly. Short sorting through the archives shows the first name traces back to the group out east - perhaps you've heard about them. How the name and the items we have here are connected is beyond my understanding, but-”
“Well, this has been an absolutely riveting discussion about your collection of trash, Qitel,” I told him as I stood up to leave. “But this really sounds like an issue to be resolved by your fellow guildsmen.”
The sound of another shell splitting rang out as I turned away.
“I'm not through talking with you, predator.”
The sting as a piece nailed me in the back of the head prompted me to whirl back around, sticking my beak in the insolent yotul's snout. “Perhaps you've forgotten, little man,” I cooed in an equally bittersweet tone to the one he gave me before. “The krakotl never had a problem with settling issues the old-fashioned way before the interview. Try me and find out why I'm in the line of work I am.”
“Oh, we wouldn't want that in such a"- he waved his paw to a group of passersby who had stopped to gawk at my display -”public forum. Please, contain yourself.”
I had to force the feathers on my back to settle and I raised my head away from him. “What else is it you wanted, then?”
“Well, I'd appreciate if you took this merchandise off my paws,” he told me as he brushed the electronics and printout toward me.
“Why would I do that?”
“Because you're closer to the humans than I'd ever care to be, and may be able to find out who this Choctaw Nexus is. Something about the package just feels… off. And I know when to trust my feelings. Besides, we both know that you know where Tac is, don't we?”
“I don't-”
“We have videographic evidence that you conspired with a human - of the aforementioned squatters, no less - and let the kid escape. You're not as sneaky as you think, and if we find this ‘Choctaw Nexus’ turns out to be a bad actor that can be traced back to them - and by extension, you - well, there’d be no talking down my boss from having you dealt with. By helping me find out who this is, you may yet be able to clear your name of any wrongdoing.”
I clenched my beak tightly to maintain a straight face. Qitel stood up with a flourish and discarded the bag he was carrying in a bin.
“See, the krakotl were never special for using threats and bullying to get results. It's because you were good at killing predators,” he jeered. “Now, if you don't mind, this primitive has appointments to attend to… old lady who got trampled courtesy of the humans and all. You stay out of trouble, Hileen, and stay in touch.”
The self-assured marsupial melded into the crowd in a matter of seconds, leaving me with a table containing dumpster trophies and a pile of shells. Reluctantly, I swept the shells into my wing and dumped them into the bin before gathering the other two items he'd left me and stuffing them into my bag. I'd been gone from Nampi long enough and she would notice my absence before long.
Crossing the walkway again, I could spot from where I stood that Nampi was indeed still in the Platinum Paw. I approached, and soon I found that while she didn't seem to have noticed me stepping away, she was definitely in a soured mood based on the sagging of her ears and tail. With my talons clacking on the floorboards, I hustled to her side and her mood chippered up ever so slightly as she heard me approach.
I chimed in, “Find anything?”
“Everything. I want everything, Red, and I can't decide on what I want. They all just look so great!”
From behind, a voice called out, “Nampi!”
We both jumped at the exclamation and turned about to spot the venlil lady I'd seen before spring from behind the shelf. The man poked his head from behind the shelf too, though less enthusiastically and with yet another bag in his clutches. My friend's eyes widened in surprise with her tail and ears perking up in kind. With a light in her eyes, she exclaimed, “Nalek!”
The two embraced with shrill squeals and laughter as Nalek's accompaniment and I traded awkward glances.
“It's been too long!”
“You never stayed in contact!”
The women exchanged giddy greetings and the pompous stranger turned to me, leering over me as though she was sizing me up.
“Who's your friend here?”
“Oh she's actually my-...”
Nampi paused for a moment, looking back to me.
“Yeah, she's a friend.”
“A friend,” Nalek repeated while her eyes flicked between Nampi and I. “Right.”
Somehow, I get the impression that that was judgemental.
“I'm Hileen, by the way,” I chirped, “if names are to be exchanged.”
“Hileen, that's a lovely name! And such plumage to match, it's a wonder you aren't swarmed by suitors!”
Internally, I groaned at the notion. The idea of being approached by someone to state their interest in me made me queasy, to say the least. Thankfully, I never had that issue growing up as most of the other drakes in school were too busy chasing girls who didn't have a lousy pigmentation mutation such as myself.
“I'm flattered,” I told Nalek before turning to the man whose name had yet to be introduced. “May we get your name?”
“Sask.”
His response was succinct and tonally flat, though there was a brief silence as I expected him to elaborate. Nalek's beads jingled as she lashed him on the calf with her tail.
“I'm Sask, Nalek's fiancée,” he added, throwing her a look to see if she was satisfied.
Nampi gasped with her paws over her snout. “Fiancée! Nalek, you're getting married and you never even told me!”
“Well, I felt a little guilty since it technically broke our pact we made when we were pups. You remember that?”
“Of course! Why wouldn’t I? ‘Let she who bonds through betrothal first be cast out unto the world for all to admonish her!’”
Sask and I both gave inquisitive expressions. “You two spoke like that as pups?” Sask asked.
“Well, I'm paraphrasing,” Nampi admitted with a playful ear waggle. “But you get the gist.”
“Indeed, they do, sweet Nampi. Now, may I ask what you're doing bringing your avian friend here into this store on this fine claw?”
“Oh, no no, she's the one treating me! Isn't that right, Red?”
I saw her tail twitch and was sure it took restraint not to tickle my neck with it as we stood before her old friend.
“She's been a good friend,” I explained. “So I wanted to reverse the roles for once and treat her to something myself.”
Nampi skipped over to me and wrapped her arm around me, glancing back to her old friend. “See? We'd all be so lucky to have a… friend like her.”
“So I've witnessed. But perhaps you're a bit stuck, as I've seen you prancing up and down these aisles for a while, no? Maybe you don't know what you want?”
“Nalek, you know I've never been good about making my mind up.”
“Some things never change, you ditz. Tell you what: you and Sask go find us a seat and we can catch up all we'd like when we're not taking up aisle space, yes? So shoo! I'll help Hileen here pick one out for you!”
With a bored grunt, Sask made off with the goods he had strapped to himself, followed by Nampi who gave me one more playful tail flick before dashing off into the crowd. I looked back to the mottled snout of Nalek who watched her friend wander off with a wistful glance.
“She was my first, you know.”
“Your what now.”
“Love. Way back when we were growing from pups into young adults back in private education, we explored much together. We saw each other through a lot, including the less savory parts of finding a mate. When Nampi realized it wasn't the boys she was into, she turned to me, and I offered my hand as her stalwart companion… to a point.”
“You weren't interested in her the same way?”
“I'd grown up seeing her as a sister of sorts, so ultimately, when we split it off, we stayed close as friends and she never seemed to be bothered by it. She struggled to find others in school who had the same interests as herself, but she never fussed about it.”
Nalek's claws browsed over a set of pouched bandoliers made with intricate embroidering. “Have you two… spent the night together? Alone?”
Spiritually, I reeled from the inquiry. The whiplash from that question was equitable to being smacked by a human. “Wha- why? How's that pertinent to the subject at hand?”
“That sounds like a ‘yes’ to me,” she purred with a smug glance my way.
I didn't need to begin to list the different ways such a question was violating to our privacy, and yet this woman was treating it like a game.
“Not really your concern, ma'am.”
Nalek chuckled as she picked out one of the bandoliers and inspected it with her claws. “I'd like to think that she and I still have that old connection, despite everything. And to that end, I know that she's no slag and doesn't trust easy. To see her be so vulnerable around you and to talk so highly of someone who's clearly below her income level as a predator…”
She stretched the bandolier out to appreciate the design in its entirety.
“Well, that's something special. Here"- she foisted the accessory into my wings as I stood gobsmacked -"this just screams her name.”
“This is, like, double my budget.”
“Love don't come cheap, darling. You wanna see good things happen, sometimes you've gotta step out of your comfort zone and grasp for it!”
“I'm being lectured by a rich woman on finances.”
“It's a philosophy that goes beyond money, ‘Red.’ The humans have a saying, in their horrendously predatory nomenclature, that contains a kernel of truth: ‘you miss every shot you don't take’.”
Yep, that's definitely a human phrase.
Nalek's steely braid rattled with every flick of the tail as we proceeded through the checkout.
“You want things to change between you and her?” she continued. “Don't just wait for it to happen.”
She let the conversation rest there as we finished the purchase, possibly to let me recuperate mentally from the damage done to my account. Outside, we found our respective partners sitting at a table with Sask looking up in boredom as Nampi chatted away, though she immediately shut up and turned to me with excited flicks of her tail as she saw what I was carrying.
I held it toward her and she happily shot to her feet, effortlessly removing the tags with her claws and clipping it to her belt. Nalek clapped and waggled her tail as the giddy lady did a whirl about to let us admire the accessory. While I'd have preferred one with pockets to give it a more practical use, I decided to let Nalek have the victory as our mutual friend clearly enjoyed it.
The rest of the paw was a blur as the two friends chatted without end until Sask eventually reminded his betrothed that they had a schedule to attend to. Though Nalek offered to call us a taxi home as a gesture of kindness, I saw through her ruse to determine that she was trying to pull a fast one on me - the clever ear flick she gave as we boarded the automated vehicle sold it for me.
We sat in the seats as the vehicle took the express ride home.
Nampi cleared her throat before she spoke, “Thank you for taking some time to spend with me, I know you've had a lot less free time as of late.”
“It's a prison of my own design, if I must be honest. A feedback loop of working a job that doesn't guarantee a paycheck to pay for rent that keeps going up, and thus needing to work more.”
The venlil giggled and chided me, “You really should've stayed in university.”
“There's a lotta 'should haves’ that've led me to this point. No use wondering what could have been.”
“There's always a use for wondering what could have been, Hileen.”
She wrapped an arm around my shoulder.
“Every decision I make, I always wonder what I could've done differently that it'd have turned out better,” she explained as she waved her free paw to the sky. “It's how you grow as a person, Red.”
Her silky pelt felt heavenly in contrast to the chilly air from outside, making it hard to let her words sink in.
“You rich types seem chock full of philosophy. I wonder if I'll become a brooding orator when I get some cash to my name.”
The cab filled with laughter as we veered around the final corner to my neighborhood, as it was the closest stop. The door popped open accompanied by a chime from the drone, signaling for me to depart.
But before my talons could even hit the pavement, I felt Nampi's scrawny arms wrap around my waist and she let out a pitiful mewl again.
“You don't need to get off here,” she told me with a pouty expression. “We can spend the rest of the paw at my place.”
“I'd love it, but I need to water my plants and get the month's bills sorted before they're due. Again.”
One claw at a time, I plucked her paws from around my waist and the childish venlil conceded, giving me another ear waggle as I departed. “I'll see you tomorrow?” I asked her.
“If you still have eyes by then, then you can bet your ass!”
“I still don't gamble.”
“You'll come around to it eventually.”
I shut the door to the taxi and watched as it carted away the one venlil who I ever truly felt on the same wavelength as. Fiddling with the lock felt like more of a chore than usual at this time as I felt a little voice tugging at the back of my head.
“You miss every shot you don't take.”
The lock felt jammed as I began to jiggle it more vigorously with the electric key. Either the RFID or NFC readers were messed up, as the lock refused to accept my key. I looked up and down the street, though Nampi was now long gone for me to rescind my earlier rejection.
“Every decision I make, I wonder what I could've done differently.”
The door rattled as I grew more and more infuriated with the lock. Qitel's smug expression as he threatened me so boldly in public played back in my head, and I wondered what would've happened had I decided to go through with insulting his mother. Better yet, I wondered what could've been had I not backed down in the face of his unflinching confidence.
Bzzt. The lock rejected my key again.
“Raagh! You fucking useless hunk of junk!”
I squawked in anger and kicked against the door, careless of the consequences of having Markol back down here to admonish another of his tenants for causing a ruckus. The walls were surprisingly sturdy for how ineffective the venlil architecture looked on the surface and I reeled back in pain as my leg throbbed.
Click.
I looked to my left to see that it wasn't my door that came open, but that of the twins. The door cracked open ever so slightly, no doubt nudged by the force of my tirade and I sighed. Nobody was expected to be home at this time, with Vili being away and Luka leaving early to get a head start.
Luka had been given a stern talking-to by the landlord for allowing one of those cats into his apartment through neglect, and I was disappointed that he seemed to have not learned his lesson this time. In fact, it seemed he hadn't even thought to lock the door this time.
I took it upon myself to shut the door for him before turning back to my own apartment door. Grasping the key with one talon, I turned it ever so gently, though the lock still refused to give in.
With a bit more force, the torsion applied to the key felt as though it should've snapped it by now. Markol sure didn't waste any expense for the security for this place, doubtlessly as a result of his history in electronic security, but I wished now that he had provided a way in that didn't rely on privately sourced locks.
Considering my options as I stood trapped outside, I realized that I had never gotten around to paying for a new lock for Tadi. I'd considered contacting her to inform her that Tac had made it out of town safely, but that'd involve also telling her that her son was now in the care of humans as if that was a better outcome to her.
Stepping out front, I realized that there was one more option I hadn't considered: my window. I usually forgot to lock it after I was through letting air circulate and I was silently grateful to myself for this absentmindedness now more than ever. Sticking a foot on the threshold, I lifted myself in a way that'd allow me to have leverage to force the window open.
The window made me fight for every inch, but I felt a strange satisfaction as it slowly opened up into an entrance that I could squeeze my way through. I let out a sigh as my talons clicked against the cool floor and slid the window shut.
I laid my satchel on the couch and turned back to the door, ready to unleash my fury on the disobedient object. But as I reached for the lock to manually open the door, I noted that the lights on the RFID interface both flashed at once, blinking erratically. Red and green flickered without rhyme or reason, indicating that it was both active and inactive.
As pretty as the colors were, I now knew that Markol's locks were not as reliable as he had touted them about: typically, such would not occur unless the device was damaged deliberately, and yet nothing indicated that I'd had uninvited guests. One could pray that those cats didn't secretly know how to cobble together an ECM jammer, but my personal wager was on faulty equipment.
Settling in, I browsed my favorite soaps on the television. For what was intended to be a day of relaxation and show of affection for a friend, I found myself rather wound up over all the things that added up. Couples threw around flowery words and swooned over one another on screen as I felt the tension diffuse. My holopad rang and I turned it over to spot that Nampi was informing me that she'd arrived home safely.
>>> Feels empty here, all alone.
She made sure to drive the point home with a sticker of a venlil making a pouty expression.
Next time, I thought to myself, I'll get it right for you, Nampi.
[ First / Previous / Next ]

Jenna and I had always found solace on the open road. It was our shared sanctuary, a canvas of asphalt and landscapes where our worries dissolved in the rearview mirror. Every mile was a story, every destination a fresh start. This trip was meant to be just another chapter in our collection of weekend getaways—a simple drive down the scenic coast, camping under the stars with the promise of a seaside sunrise.
We left the bustling cityscape on a bright Friday afternoon, our spirits high and our old Chevy bursting with gear. Jenna managed the playlist, a mix of classic rock and indie anthems that had become our unofficial road trip soundtrack. As the urban sprawl gave way to open fields and distant mountains, our conversation meandered from mundane work chatter to excited plans for the days ahead.
Hours into our journey, as the sun began to dip below the horizon, painting the sky in strokes of pink and orange, we spotted a couple stranded by the roadside. Their car, an old sedan, had its hood propped open, emitting wisps of steam. They looked forlorn, thumbing for a lift, their faces etched with the fatigue of being stuck in such a desolate spot.
"Should we help them?" Jenna asked, her hand pausing on the volume dial.
"Let’s stop. It could be us in their shoes," I replied, guided by that unwritten rule of the road that binds all travelers. We pulled over, rolling down the window to greet them.
Their relief was palpable. "Thank you so much!" the woman exclaimed as they approached. "I’m Lila, and this is Mark. Our car just decided today was a good day to die on us."
After a brief exchange, we learned that they were also headed towards the coast. It seemed like fate, or at least a fortunate coincidence. They grabbed their bags from their car—just a couple of backpacks, really—and squeezed into our back seat.
With new companions, our journey resumed. Mark shared stories of their travels, each tale more adventurous than the last, while Lila chimed in with comments that brought laughter all around. The chemistry was instant, a bond formed by the shared love of the road and the tales it inspired.
As darkness settled in, a dense fog began to roll across the landscape. The road ahead turned murky, our headlights struggling to slice through the thickening white blanket. Mark suggested a shortcut, a lesser-known logging road that cut through the woods and promised to shave off an hour from our trip.
Hesitant but trusting, I turned off the main highway. The road was uneven, gravel crunching under our tires, flanked by towering pines that loomed over us like silent sentinels. The deeper we drove, the thicker the fog became, enveloping the car in a ghostly embrace.
Lila grew quiet, her earlier vivacity replaced by a tense silence. She stared out the window, her brow furrowed as if listening to something beyond our hearing. Mark whispered to her occasionally, his voice too low for us to catch any words.
The atmosphere inside the car shifted. The air turned cold, and an uncomfortable feeling settled over us. Jenna gripped my hand tighter. The radio, which had been playing softly in the background, began to crackle with static. Between bursts of harsh white noise, a faint whispering emerged, as if someone was speaking just out of the range of clarity.
I glanced in the rearview mirror to ask Mark and Lila if they knew what might be causing the interference, but my heart nearly stopped when I saw the backseat was empty. Not just empty of Mark and Lila, but devoid of any sign they had ever been there—no backpacks, no water bottles, nothing.
"Jenna, where did they go?" I stuttered, my voice barely above a whisper.
She turned to look, her face paling as she took in the empty seat. "I... I don't know. They were just there!"
The whispering from the radio grew louder, now clearly distinguishable as voices. Not just any voices—Mark and Lila's. They were calling out to us, their tones twisted into something chilling, almost mocking. The hairs on the back of my neck stood up as they said our names, urging us to come find them.
Panic surged through me. I floored the accelerator, desperate to put as much distance between us and whatever this nightmare was. The fog outside seemed to thicken in response, swirling around the car as if trying to slow us down.
Suddenly, Jenna screamed, pointing ahead. Two figures stood in the middle of the road, illuminated by our headlights through the dense fog. It was Mark and Lila, or at least, their shapes. But something was horribly wrong. Their eyes glowed with an unnatural light, and their smiles were too wide, the corners of their mouths stretched too far up their cheeks.
I slammed on the brakes, the car screeching to a halt just feet away from them. The radio fell silent as we faced the figures in the road. They didn't move, didn't blink, just stared at us with those terrifying smiles.
"What do you want?" I managed to choke out, my voice trembling with fear.
Their smiles faded, replaced by expressions of mock sadness. "You didn't stay with us," Lila's figure said, her voice a distorted echo of her earlier, cheerful tone.
"You left us behind," Mark's figure added, stepping closer to the car. The fog seemed to move with him, curling around his legs as if he were part of it.
"We just wanted to share this place with you," Lila's figure said, moving forward to join Mark. "Now, you're a part of it forever."
Before I could react, the figures vanished, melting into the fog as if they had never been there. I stared out into the night, my breath coming in short, sharp gasps. Jenna and I exchanged a look of sheer terror. Without a word, I threw the car into reverse, turning us around and speeding back towards the highway.
The drive back was silent, both of us too shaken to speak. Every shadow in the fog looked like a figure waiting to emerge, and every whisper of wind sounded like a voice calling out.
When we finally reached home, the sun was beginning to rise, casting weak light over a world that felt entirely different than it had the day before. We didn't talk about what happened, not wanting to make it any more real than it already was. But the memory of that night—the voices, the figures, their final words—lingered long after.
Days turned into weeks, and although life slowly returned to normal, the experience stayed with us. Sometimes, in the quiet moments before sleep, I'd hear whispers, faint and distant, like an echo of that night. Jenna and I never went on another night drive after that, and we avoided talking about Mark and Lila, as if mentioning them might bring them back into our lives.
But the road, once a place of freedom and escape, now felt like a trap, a reminder that some things are better left undiscovered.

I believed in fairies as a kid. More than believed in them. I think something terrible happened to me, and I've just buried it until now.
Call me a typical emotion-bottling man, but I have never considered therapy. No matter what I went through, no matter how many times I thought to myself, verbatim, that I should talk to someone about this, I just never thought of it as an option. It simply wasn't on my roster. It was just one of those things that existed on a separate plane of existence than I was living in, never to cross paths or interact lest the universe collapse in on itself.
I have no problem with therapy, don't get me wrong. It isn't like I don't understand the overall appeal. I have plenty of friends who swear by it, swear it has helped them tremendously, including my wife. It just wasn't ever something I thought was in my cards.
"I just never really thought about it," I told Alice one evening, when she had brought the topic up once again after dinner.
There was a serene sense of peace wafting through the entire house that day, and I was feeling content. It was a Sunday, and swimming season, so we had dropped Emmie off that morning at the public pool for practice and gone straight to our favorite breakfast place. The rest of the day was filled with all the conversation that had built up over the week, all the topics we couldn't fully dig into with each other while babysitting our eight year old, and lounging, all crammed in between sporadic bursts of housework and paperwork we had to catch up on. It was the perfect day, in my humble opinion. It was a lovely moment of peace in the midst of a chaotic life, as is life with kids. And now the sounds of Mario Kart drifted in from the living room, Emmie's squeals cutting through the cheery music every now and then, causing Alice and I to share small smiles of acknowledgement.
Oh, to be a child again. Still a little drenched from a post-swimming shower, full of chili, eyes glowing with the reflection of a television screen.
"Well, maybe you should." My wife was scooping leftover chili into a Tupperware with a ladle. Her hair had been tied up like it was every day after dinner, as if she planned to run a marathon rather than do the cleaning up. She wasn't looking at me, dialed into the task at hand.
It's crazy how some parts of my memory could be so good, and others nonexistent.
I reached over from where I stood before the dishwasher, sliding my arm around her waist. She gave me a look, like, what?
"I just don't think it's for me, babe," I muttered, resting my mouth on her shoulder as if I was trying to skip her ears and speak right through her skin. "You know those things make me uncomfortable sometimes."
She let out a half groan, half sigh, setting down the container and the ladle and turning to face me, draping her arms over my shoulders.
"Everything makes you uncomfortable, John."
I smiled, letting my hands fall to her hips. I knew her frustrated act was just that, an act, at least for the most part.
"It's good for you," she continued pointedly, reaching up to tap her pointer finger against my forehead as I swayed her back and forth to a nonexistent tune. "Like medicine. And I know for a fact there are some things you need to work through."
I feigned offense. "You think I'm some kind of nut job?"
"Everyone needs therapy," she snarled, pulling out of my arms, but she didn't resist when I reached out and drew her back in. "Not just nut jobs."
And that was how most of those conversations went. Some got a little more heated, ending with a lightly slammed door (so as not to wake our daughter) and a whisper-shout of "this is why you need therapy!"
I feel I'm making it sound bad, but it wasn't. Even our more serious fights never quite felt like fights. They felt like playing. We were like two cats, biting and tackling and swishing our tails, but never baring our teeth to hiss. I never felt genuine, full-bodied anger towards her, and I knew she felt the same. It sounds sappy, but we were just very in love. I sometimes felt that we had never actually left the honeymoon phase.
I'm also making it sound like that conversation was incredibly common, and it wasn't. It came up maybe once every few months. I knew she was just looking out for me. She knew me better than anyone.
We had met through mutual friends, and we had initially bonded over our terrible childhoods. We both had moms who were out of the picture, and over emotional, over compensating dads, although this manifested in vastly different ways. Alice's mother left her father for a D-list rockstar type, following him on his state wide tour. She would sometimes send Alice letters or postcards from the road, although her dad wouldn't always let her keep them if they seemed to be stained with blood or seemed to have made contact with any strange white powders.
Her dad coped with anger. He never laid a hand on her, but his shouting and the sounds of glass bottles smashing against the walls kept her up almost every night. During the days he'd take her out, buy her things, go mini golfing and bowling and to the movies. Anything to seem more fun than her mother.
My mother passed away on my seventh birthday. She was driving home from work, which was at a law firm half an hour away from our house, when it began to rain. She was texting my dad her ETA when she ran a red light and a semi truck T-boned her, completely obliterating her car.
After that, everything changed. My seventh birthday could've been my twenty-first. At night it was the worst. I remember sitting with my dad as he cried, curled up in a sobbing ball on the filthy living room carpet, whimpering like a kicked puppy. He would scream and wail so loud the walls shook. He would say, over and over as if I wasn't hearing him, sometimes mumbling and sometimes shrieking, "She was cut in half. I'm sorry sir, she's gone. No, there's no chance she survived, she was completely cut in half."
The days were almost worse. During the day, when he could decrease the helpless wails into weeping at the very least, his attention turned to me. He tried to get something out of me, almost silently begging me to break down with him. Every other second it was, "How are you feeling, son? Do you understand what's happening? You poor thing, you must be devastated, your mommy is gone... Don't you want to cry?"
But I couldn't indulge, and I didn't want to. I had to wash the sheets, because he'd pissed them again, and I didn't want him to sleep in it and smell like pee when he took me to school the next day. I had to vacuum the carpet, so the next time he curled up on it and begged God to take him too, when he finally stood up, his cheek wouldn't be caked in crumbs and dust.
I don't know if I ever truly mourned. My mother's death was more like an absence, as if someone had taken a pair of scissors and carved a chunk out of my side, or snipped off a limb. I could still feel her, I could still talk to her, but all I got back was a deep ache and a crushing silence.
I hated how people reacted when I told them my mom was dead, and had been since I was a little boy. I hated the looks on their faces when they asked how she died, and when I told them. How their mouths fell open dumbly and their eyebrows twisted and contorted in sympathetic horror. "I'm so sorry, I didn't know," they said, as if there was vomit rising in their throats, and I wanted to say, "Well, you fucking asked, didn't you?"
Alice never reacted like that. In fact, she never really even asked me what happened. We were on our second date, nursing beers while leaning against the pool table a a dingy speakeasy, when she told me about her own mom. It was the first time in a long time I actually felt like the conversation was open, like I could respond and she would listen and care, but not too much. Not an uncomfortable amount. When I told her about my parents she didn't say anything, and her pretty face didn't contort. She leaned over the corner of the pool table and kissed me on the cheek, took my hand.
The day she found out she was pregnant, we promised each other to be better, to not let our child ever have to grieve alone or feel the very specific hopeless terror that only a parent can cause.
So maybe I should have listened to her. Maybe I should have gone to therapy the first time she brought it up, the first time she told me how it had helped her get through her own terrible memories. But if I'm being honest, I didn't think I had anything to get through. I had left it in the past, I had coped so far in my own somewhat crooked way, I didn't want to dig any of that back up. I didn't want to be put back in that place where I was expected to talk, to cry, to open up. It made my skin crawl just thinking about it.
"I was always the therapist," I would say to her with a crooked grin. "And I like it that way."
Then, the dreams started.
I could tell you I don't know what triggered them, I don't know why it was now. But that wouldn't be the truth. I know exactly why I started to remember.
At first, they were brief. Nightmares that I couldn't quite recall or explain, waking up disoriented and a little sick. The rest of my day would feel strange, like I was surrounded by a thick fog. Eventually, they started to wake me up in the middle of the night, drenched in sweat and screaming, scaring the shit out of my wife. Once I ran to the bathroom and threw up, barely making it to the toilet. That was when the word "therapy" came up again.
It feels like I've been in a coma for twenty years, and I'm just waking up now.
It's so strange how different the world looks to a child.
I believed in fairies as a kid. Laugh it up if you want. When I turned four, my aunt brought me this book - we've all had one, I think. It was one of those huge hardcover books filled with information about something mythical, with little patches of fabric to simulate a mermaid's scales or a dragon's claw.
Mine was about fairies, and it was so real to me. My mom would sit up with me later than she probably should have, reading to me, placing my hand on the textures to feel. I wanted to know everything about them, I became obsessed, and naturally, my parents played along. They bought me toys, books... every year I had a fae themed birthday cake, and any kid who dared to giggle behind their hands weren't invited to next year's celebration.
When I was old enough to use the internet, supervised of course, I began further research. My mom helped me navigate Wikipedia first, and they had plenty of information to sustain me for a while. My interest turned from wings and magical powers to different types of fae from every corner of the earth, mushroom rings and their alleged distaste for iron. While I still wasn't very good at reading, I would just look at the pictures until she got home from work.
When my mom died, the fairy memorabilia began to amp up. My aunt bought me new books, gave them to me wrapped and tied with ribbons with tear filled eyes, and my dad brought them up whenever he thought I needed comforting and felt strong enough to leave the house. "Wanna go look in the forest for fairies, son?"
I'm embarrassed to admit it, but I began to worship the fairies. I was convinced they lived in the forest behind my house, just behind each tree I looked at, hiding from me. I would spend my weekends escaping into the woods with a bucket and a cheap pair of binoculars, positive that this time, this day, I would see one.
At night, when my dad finally passed out in his own puddle of tears and other bodily fluids, I would pray to them. I never believed in God, we weren't a particularly religious family, and besides, I had seen what good He had done for my dad thus far. But I believed in the fairies.
I asked them for help with my father. I asked them for peace. I asked them to bring her back to me.
They never answered.
Until they did.
It was a Friday. I remember now, I'm not sure how I could have forgotten. After school I had sprinted into the shade of the trees before my dad could stop me, gripping the hem of my shirt in my fist, the thin fabric bearing the weight of two handfuls of the shiniest silverware and most colorful buttons I could find in our dusty cabinets.
I had a plan that day. I was going to lure them to me.
My path began in a clearing where I thought a ring of mushrooms may have begun to grow... but even without that, it was just the perfect spot for fairies. I could picture them flitting between the trees, chirping to each other happily, picking wildflowers to weave into flower crowns.
I walked backwards all the way back to my bedroom window, dropping another item every few steps. When I got inside and looked out my window, I could see my trail of shiny things curve through the overgrown grass in our backyard and disappear into the trees.
I was so excited, I could hardly contain myself. Tonight, surely, they would come to me. They would show themselves, and they would help me. But after another few late hours of coddling my father, finally convincing him to drink some water and get in bed, I was exhausted. I completely forgot about my plan. When I got to my room I collapsed on my mattress, not even bothering to undress before I closed my eyes.
Then I heard it. The scratching.
I opened my eyes. The moonlight shining through my bedroom window casted strange shadows across my ceiling, shadows of the swaying grass and the creaking trees.
It was strangely silent, other than the sound. Usually there was lots of noise, or at the very least a few crickets, but not tonight. Tonight, I realized, I couldn't even hear the wind.
I sat up slowly, as if in a dream, and looked toward my window. I couldn't see anything out there, nothing glaringly obvious at least, that could be making that noise.
The scratching turned to a tap. Tap tap tap, like a fingernail against a glass. It had a playful air to it, like someone was saying, look over here!
I stood, rubbing my eyes, and stumbled over. The tapping stopped abruptly when I got to the window and peered outside, out to the dark yard, pitch black if not for the moon's glow. The grass didn't sway, the trees didn't creak. I frowned and unlatched the window, sliding it up above my head.
I was right, there was no wind. Not even a gust. Everything was still outside, like it was frozen. I actually started to believe it was frozen, that time had stopped completely somehow, before I saw it.
My trail of silverware and buttons. Sparkling softly in the moonlight.
Disappearing.
It began where the path met the trees, curving off where I couldn't follow it anymore. A fork disappeared right before my eyes, right on the edge. Just vanished, as if someone who was invisible had picked it up and stuffed it in a pocket very quickly.
Then another went, a spoon. Then a particularly large gold button. Whatever was taking them was doing what I had wanted, it was taking my bait, it was coming to me. And it was as if whatever had tapped at my window had wanted me to see this, wanted to show me.
But something felt very, very wrong.
This wasn't how I had pictured it. There was no twinkling, tiny winged thing at my window, winking at me before dashing back into the safety of the trees. There were no secrets being whispered in my ear, no fairy dust or promises of better things.
Something about this wasn't right. It felt like a mimicry, almost a mockery, of what I had imagined. Like something was trying to give me what I wanted, but was rusty at it.
I didn't want this anymore.
My stomach twisted and my hands shook as I pulled the window back down slowly, watching more glittery things disappear from the grass, growing closer and closer. As soon as it was closed I quickly locked it and pulled the blinds shut, turning my back to the window as if something would happen that I didn't want to see.
Nothing happened. The deafening silence continued for a few seconds as my ears strained to hear anything else happening outside. Then the wind picked up, and the sounds of crickets, muffled by my closed window, filled the night air.
I don't remember when I fell asleep that night, I just know I felt unnerved and jumpy for a while. I woke up the next morning feeling guilty. Had the fairies really come last night? Maybe they had come to talk to me, to bring me gifts, favors, and what had I done? I had closed my window on them. I felt ungrateful. Why had I even been scared? Because it was dark outside? What was I, a baby?
When I opened my window and peered outside, I gasped. The trail of silverware and buttons was completely gone, all the way up to the last one, which I had placed on my windowsill. In its place was a shoe. I didn't know what kind of shoe it was, but it looked sort of nice, fancy. I remember smiling out the window as I opened it, as if they were looking, and taking my gift.
How could I forget that night? How could I have forgotten what happened after? I feel crazy, either like I made it all up or like I've made up everything since then, like my life isn't truly my own.
I remember telling my dad. I remember saying, "Dad, the fairies came last night!" and the absent smile he gave me.
Until I showed him their gift. The shoe. Instantly his face went pale and he snatched it from my hands, staring at me as if I was something unholy.
"Where did you get this, Johnny?"
"The fairies, dad, I told you!"
He didn't respond. Just gave me another long, solemn look, before turning away from me, still holding the present I received close to his chest. I was upset, but I knew better than throwing a tantrum. That would be too much emotion anyways, too uncomfortable. Even back then, I didn't know how to handle those things.
I didn't show him their gifts after that. I didn't want to risk having them taken away. I tried not to be scared of the fairies, even though they always came at night, but I didn't go to my window when they came anymore. I read everywhere that fairies didn't particularly like to be seen, even though this one seemed to want to be. It always began with tapping, but otherwise complete silence that almost felt like it was swallowing me... and eventually the tapping would stop, the silence would pass, and I would fall asleep. In the morning there was always another gift for me, sitting on my window sill. A sparkly gold ring, the other matching shoe, a hat... I smiled when I took every one, wanting them to know I was grateful. And I would leave things for them too, little sweets or shiny things like coins or paperclips that I found on the ground at school.
Things seemed to get better with my dad for a while. He kept to himself more, he was quieter. At night he would cry softly in his room, rather than his uproarious wails that I used to have to quell so the neighbors wouldn't come knocking. During the day, he would talk to me, but more casually. He didn't ask me how I was feeling anymore, or tell me to let it out.
I hoped this was the fairies. I felt invincible, like I had a secret superpower that no one knew about. I was friends with fairies.
Then one night, everything changed.
It started with the tapping, as always. That night I was fast asleep, catching up on well earned rest since the nightly therapy sessions had ceased.
The tapping woke me. It was that loud. It was louder than usual... but it seemed like it stopped abruptly as soon as I raised my head to look.
That was different...
That night, I had left my blinds up and my window open by accident. Since that first night, even though I wasn't scared anymore, I had always closed them... but this time, I must have forgotten.
It was silent outside. It seemed darker than usual. I could almost make out something, a shape, way on the other side of the yard, but it was too dark and I was too far away to tell.
That feeling from that first night retuned. A twisting like a hand reaching into my stomach and mixing things around, a heavy feeling in my chest like someone had stolen all of the air from my room, even though the window was open. The silence seemed to crush me, bearing down on me from every angle, making my ribs hurt.
The feeling that something was very wrong.
I don't remember deciding to stand: looking back, I have no idea why I would do that in my state of fight or flight. I don't know if I consciously chose to. I don't remember walking over, but I remember getting there, my hands on the windowsill and my head poking out into the completely still night air.
There was something there. On the edge of the trees. Right where I had seen that first fork disappear into thin air. I squinted, leaning further into the darkness to try and make out what it was.
When I finally did, the outline taking shape as my eyes adjusted to the darkness, I began to shake uncontrollably. I remember that I tried to scream, but no sound would come. I couldn't move, couldn't do anything but stare.
Two legs stood in front of the trees, facing me. Two legs, a blood-soaked pair of slacks, no shoes on the purple, swollen feet. And a jagged, violent rip in the torso where the rest of my mother's body had been severed from its lower half.
It took me a while to realize that the legs weren't standing on their own. They began to move, jerking clumsily toward the window, like something I couldn't see was struggling to hold them up. I finally forced myself out of my trance and fell to my carpet, vomiting.
I don't remember much else about that night yet. My dad came running when I started crying, I'm sure, but he didn't see what I saw. My mom's legs were gone, or hidden. Because they weren't for him.
They were for me.
We moved after that. Before now if you had asked me why we moved so far away so suddenly, I probably would have mumbled something about the grief, and it being too hard to stay where my mother had died. But I remember why now.
It was because the next morning, when I checked my windowsill, there was a hand. My mother's hand. Purple and stiff, and missing her gold wedding ring. Reaching, fingers rested against the glass, like it was trying to get in.
Like it had been tapping.
I don't want to think about what else it might have brought, had we stayed.
That thing, whatever it was, wasn't my mother, and it wasn't a fairy. I had invited something else with all my praying, with all my naive and innocent beliefs, and with all my bottled up emotions. I had invited it, and I had let it in.
And then I had forgotten everything. Maybe I bottled that up, too.
Now I remember. Now I'm having nightmares, and waking up with that sick feeling in my gut, my eyes jumping to our closed bedroom window.
Because a week ago, my daughter woke me up very early in the morning my jumping on our bed. A week ago, she shook me awake, her eager smile stretching all the way across her face. A week ago, she told me, "Dad, the fairies came last night!"
She showed me a doll, a ballerina, with a pink tutu and beautiful long blonde hair.
And now, with all these terrible memories hitting me like cold water to the face, only one keeps me awake at night.
I asked them for help with my father. I asked them for peace. I asked them to bring her back to me.
It has granted two of my wishes, in its own twisted way. My father grew distant from me and my mother was brought back in pieces.
I'm happy now. But I don't have peace. I don't think I'll ever fully have peace, at least not with a child and a wife to try and provide for, and not with all of these memories.
So what has it come back for?

26/01/2014 - WWE Royal Rumble
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Commentated by Jim Ross, JBL, and Michael Cole
We see some footage of superstars arriving to the arena today. The Authority arrive in a limousine; WWE Champion Randy Orton, Triple H, Stephanie McMahon, and Kane. Daniel Bryan is shown walking with Brie Bella. "The Animal" Batista shows up in a truck and flexes for the camera. The feed cuts and glitches out revealing a dark room with a empty rocking chair moving slowly. "We're here."
The iconic voice of Jim Ross welcomes us to the 2014 Royal Rumble as pyro erupts from the stage and the fans go wild. The Authority's music plays and the mood quickly shifts, the crowd rains down boo's. Here comes the WWE World Champion Randy Orton. Orton talks trash to some fans in the front row while Triple H, Stephanie McMahon, and Kane make their way out as well. Orton raises the title as HHH passes him a microphone. Orton is in a great mood tonight. He's got the night off and there will be 30 men all vying for a chance to get RKO'ed in the main event of Wrestlemania 30. The crowd chants, “Daniel Bryan” as Orton laughs and promises that Bryan doesn't stand a chance. If you want to win the Royal Rumble you have to be taller than these marks in the crowd, you can't be a front row wrestler like Daniel Bryan or CM Punk. The crowd breaks into a deafening “DANIEL BRYAN/CM PUNK!” chant as Orton highlights some of the past winners like himself, Triple H, and Batista. True superstars who all pass the airport test. Triple H takes the microphone and tells the fans to shut the hell up and respect greatness. The reason The Authority are out here is because they want an answer from Batista. Will The Animal join them, take the #30 spot, and win the Rumble to make the biggest Wrestlemania main event a reality? Batista's music hits and he gets a great reaction. First of all, Batista thanks the Pittsburgh fans and everyone in the WWE for welcoming him back with open arms. Batista has a ton of respect for Triple H and Orton after all those years in Evolution. They all shake hands and it looks like he's accepting the offer. Triple H tells Batista to make the right decision and do whats best for business. Batista gives the THUMBS UP! The Authority are all psyched up until.... Batista, who still has his thumb in the air, says "What's best for business.... is listening to these fans! Doing things the hard way, the same way he did it through his whole career. Batista didn't come back to be handed anything, he came back to prove he can still be The Animal. The man who beat Triple H in the main event of Wrestlemania.... The thumbs up is turned into a THUMBS DOWN! Kane charges at Batista but gets clotheslined! Randy Orton and Tripe H flee from the ring as The Animal delivers a Spinebuster to Kane and rattles the ropes! Triple H screams that Batista is going to regret this decision.....
A video package of the feud between Divas Champion AJ Lee and Mickie James is next. After AJ Lee defeated Naomi to retain her title on RAW, AJ declared she had no competition in the locker room. Cue the surprise return of Mickie James! Former psycho versus current psycho, legend versus future legend. They exchange verbal barbs over the next few weeks, with Mickie picking up some big wins and earning a title match. During a contract signing on the final RAW before the Royal Rumble, things finally turned physical and Mickie put AJ Lee through a table with a huge bulldog from the top rope! Everything comes to a head tonight with the championship on the line.
Tony Chimel lets us know that this contest is scheduled for one fall as Mickie James makes her entrance and gets emotional at the ovation from the audience in Pittsburgh. Divas Champion AJ Lee is next and she gets a mixed reaction; the fans love her but are definitely backing Mickie in this one.
AJ Lee (c) vs. Mickie James for the WWE Divas Championship
The match kicks off with AJ slapping Mickie across the face! James returns the favour and tackles AJ, raining down a flurry of punches. AJ Lee cowers into the corner but then takes advantage by slamming Mickie to the mat by her hair! AJ taunts Mickie and stomps her in the corner but when the champion charges, Mickie backdrops her over the ropes! Mickie hits a Thez Press from the apron and tosses AJ into the barricade!
They battle on the apron until AJ sends Mickie head first into the ringpost. Mickie seems genuinely hurt and the referee goes to check on her, allowing AJ to expose the turnbuckle on the opposite side of the ring. She shows no regard for her possibly injured challenger, ignoring the ref and dragging Mickie back into the centre of the ring. Out of nowhere, James nails the Mick Kick! AJ is down! 1-2-AJ gets her foot underneath the bottom rope! James goes for the Stratus-faction but AJ Lee launches her into the exposed turnbuckle! Mickie James is out cold! 1-2-3! AJ retains!
Result- AJ Lee wins by pinfall via exposed turnbuckle shot. (12:58)
The Royal Rumble tumbler is back! Stephanie McMahon is overseeing things as superstars enter to pick their spots in the Royal Rumble. We see Alberto Del Rio, Brodus Clay, and other superstars pick their numbers. Triple H and Paul Heyman in the background; they shake hands and it appears that HHH hands Heyman something before he walks off.
"The American Dream" Dusty Rhodes is here! He introduces his sons, the WWE World Tag Team Champions Cody Rhodes and Goldust! The champions hug their father and make their way to the ring for a Six Pack Challenge Elimination Match! After being on the wrong side of The Authority, The Rhodes Brothers have been put in quite the predicament as they look to retain their title's against all odds.
Cody Rhodes and Goldust (c) vs. The New Age Outlaws vs. The Prime Time Players vs. Truth & Consequences vs. Hunico and Camacho vs. The Uso's in a Six Pack Challenge Elimination Match for the WWE World Tag Team Championship
Everything breaks down right off the bat. Bodies are flying everywhere. The Uso's hit a pair of dives over the ropes onto a pile of opponents. Back in the ring Hunico and Camacho eat a pair of Superkicks. Uso Splash to Hunico! 1-2-3!
Jey Uso pins Hunico via Uso Splash (Hunico and Camacho are eliminated)
The Prime Time Players take their turn dominating. Titus hits a Sit-Out Spinebuster to Billy Gunn. Darren Young launches Road Dogg from the ring and dropkicks an incoming Jimmy Uso. Xavier Woods comes out of nowhere with a springboard DDT on Titus O'Neil! Darren Young gets hit with a spinning elbow from R-Truth! Woods and Truth connect with a double Scissor Kick on Titus for the 3 count.
R-Truth pins Titus O'Neil via Double Scissors Kick (The Prime Time Players are eliminated)
Road Dogg chopblocks R-Truth immediately and throws him into the ringpost. Woods gets some shots in on Dogg but turns around into a Fameasser from Billy Gunn! 1-2-3!
Billy Gunn pins Xavier Woods via Fameasser (Truth & Consequences are eliminated)
Road Dogg grabs one of the tag title belts and brings it in the ring. The referee tries to stop him but Billy warns the referee that Triple H will fire him if he gets in their way. Billy holds Goldust as Road Dogg charges with the title ---- Goldust low blows Billy Gunn and ducks; Road Dogg knocks out Billy Gunn with the title belt! Cody Rhodes grabs Road Dogg and hits the Cross Rhodes!
Cody Rhodes pins Billy Gunn via Cross Rhodes (The New Age Outlaws are eliminated)
We are down to two teams. The Rhodes Brothers and The Uso's. The teams gather themselves in opposite corners as the crowd swells to a fever pitch. All four slug it out in the middle. Double Superkick to Goldust sends him to the floor. Cody hits the Bionic Elbow to Jimmy! Alabama Slam to Jey! Cody is all fired up! Cody goes for the Cross Rhodes but nearly gets pinned on a roll up. Double Superkick to Cody! Both The Uso's climb to the top rope but Goldust comes back in and drops Jimmy right on his yambags! Goldust meets Jey on the other side and delivers a giant superplex! BUT JIMMY RECOVERS AND FLIES OFF THE TOP! USO SPLASH TO GOLDUST! 1-2-CODY BREAKS UP THE PIN! Cody hits a Disaster Kick to Jimmy but gets Superkicked by Jey! With his last gasp of energy, Goldust nails Jey with the Final Cut! 1-2-3! Cody and Goldust retain!
Goldust pins Jey Uso via The Final Cut
Result- Cody Rhodes and Goldust retain the WWE World Tag Team Championship. (15:59)
CM Punk is taping his wrists in the locker room when Corporate Kane approaches with a bunch of security. Punk stands up ready to defend himself. But Kane tells him to calm down. He's here with a gift from The Authority. Kane hands Punk a Rumble number from the tumbler and tells him on behalf of The Authority, they wish him luck tonight. Kane leaves as punk opens the ball and shakes his head.
A video package showcases the rivalry between the United States Champion Dean Ambrose and Rob Van Dam. After RVD became # 1 Contender, The Shield brutalized him in a 3 on 1 beatdown. The next week, Rob Van Dam attacked Ambrose with a steel chair and delivered a devastating Van Daminator. Ambrose got busted open but the blood seemed to turn him into some kind of maniac. A bloodied Ambrose cut an iconically intense promo backstage in the boiler room where he challenged RVD to a Hardcore match at the Royal Rumble. Rob Van Dam accepted and began to tap into his hardcore style, even going as far as to bring back his old friend Sabu to help him fend off repeated attacks by The Shield. Tonight this rivalry concludes in a Hardcore match for the US Championship.
Dean Ambrose (c) vs. Rob Van Dam for the United States Championship in a Hardcore Match
Van Dam starts off hot with a barrage of kicks to Ambrose. RVD hits his signature barricade legdrop from the apron! He pulls out a kendo stick and starts unloading on the champion. Ambrose stops the beating by raking RVD's eyes and then snapping the kendo stick in half. Ambrose goes berserk, stabbing RVD with the sharp part of the broken kendo stick repeatedly in the corner as JR tells the TV audience to put their kids to bed because "this match is going to be bowling shoe ugly folks". Van Dam slides out of the ring and we see he's bleeding profusely. Ambrose stalks his prey on the outside but RVD tosses a steel chair full speed at his head! RVD goes under the ring and grabs a couple of trash cans and a lid. He smashes Ambrose over the head with the lid and throws him in the ring. RVD sets up a table on the outside but is momentarily distracted, trying to wipe the blood out of his eyes which allows Ambrose to crush one of the trash cans over Van Dam's head. Like a shark that smells blood in the water, Ambrose pounces on RVD and unloads punches to his open cut. The referee pulls him off and checks on RVD. But Ambrose is not done. Far from it. He goes under the ring and grabs a barbed wired baseball bat! As he gets in the ring, RVD kicks the barbed wired bat into Ambrose's face! Spike DDT! Van Dam puts a trash can over Ambrose's head and props him in the corner. VAN TERMINATOR WITH A STEEL CHAIR INTO THE TRASH CAN! RVD slowly drapes his arm over Ambrose. 1-2-Dean somehow kicks out! They exchange punches in the middle of the ring until Ambrose bites RVD's bloody head!!! RVD punches Ambrose just to get him off of him but Dean rebounds with a lariat that turns RVD inside out! Instead of going for the pin, Ambrose picks up the barbed wired baseball bat and smashes RVD in the back repeatedly! Van Dam rolls to the apron but Ambrose follows him and starts grinding the barbed wire in RVD's face! Using the pure adrenaline of survival instinct, RVD reverses into a suplex over the ropes, sending he and Ambrose crashing through the table on the outside!
The fans chant "Holy shit!" as the announcers question how much more these guys, specifically RVD, can take. RVD is first to his feet and throws Ambrose in the ring. RVD climbs to the top rope but Ambrose hits the ropes and causes him to lose balance. He tosses RVD off the top rope onto a trash can! Ambrose goes under the ring and grabs a bag..... The referee tries to stop him but Ambrose shoves him to the ground and empties the contents all over the ring ---- IT'S THUMBTACKS! He turns around and catches a steel chair hurled at him by RVD! VAN TERMINATOR! Ambrose falls into the tacks! RVD goes up top! FIVE STAR FROG SPLASH INTO THE TACKS! "BY GAWD!" Cover! 1-2-Ambrose kicks out by shoving a handful of tacks into RVD's face! Van Dam screams in pain as a now bloody Ambrose pulls himself to his feet and smiles. DIRTY DEEDS ON THE TACKS! 1-2-3!
Result- Dean Ambrose wins by pinfall via Dirty Deeds onto thumbtacks! (22:22)
Rob Van Dam is taken out on a stretcher as Dean Ambrose sits bloodied in the corner, with thumbtacks all over him and the United States Title over his shoulder, admiring his work.
Writer's Note: This match writes RVD out for the foreseeable future to give him a well deserved break. Ambrose is put over as a sadistic, hardcore, psycho path on RVD's way out.
We cut backstage where Mark Henry and The Big Show are picking their numbers. Stephanie McMahon plays nice with the legendary giants, telling them that there are always advantages to helping The Authority. Mark Henry laughs her off and walks out but Big Show appears to contemplate her words. Daniel Bryan walks in and has a face off with Triple H. Bryan wants to pick his Rumble number but HHH tells him there's only one ball left. He teases not giving it to him but places it in his hands. Bryan opens it, shakes his head and smiles, saying he wouldn't expect anything less from The Authority.
A video package on the history of the Royal Rumble match is next, highlighting past winners, elimination records, and obscure statistics. Ladies and gentlemen. We promised you a great main event.
Main Event- 30 Man Royal Rumble Match
1. Daniel Bryan
2. CM Punk
The two heroes of our story; enemies of The Authority that have been given the insurmountable task of winning from the opening spots if they want to main event Wrestlemania. They slug it out and the fans love every second of it.
3. Big E Langston
The Intercontinental Champion gets a chance to showcase his abilities in full spotlight. He tosses Bryan and Punk around much to the chagrin of the crowd. Punk and Bryan team up to stop the onslaught and slow the big man down.
4. Mark Henry
The World's Strongest Man double clotheslines Punk and Bryan before squaring up with Big E. The two meaty men begin slappin' meat until Henry squashes the IC Champion in the corner and takes advantage.
5. Alexander Rusev
The Bulgarian Brute from NXT goes nose to nose with Mark Henry. Rusev kicks Henry in the head and then charges full speed, clobbering him and sending Mark crashing from the ring for our first official elimination of the night!
Alexander Rusev eliminates Mark Henry
6. Evan Bourne
Bourne quickens the pace of the match and hits a barrage of high flying moves until he meets the brick wall known as Rusev. Rusev gets Bourne in a precarious position and clotheslines him so hard that he takes a nasty backflip bump off the apron ala Paul London 2005.
Alexander Rusev eliminates Evan Bourne
Rusev turns around and realizes he's surrounded by Bryan, Punk, and Big E! He fights valiantly but it's no use. YES+ Knee by Bryan! Rusev is rocked but still standing! GTS by Punk! Rusev is STILL somehow on his feet but falls back against the ropes ..... A clothesline from Big E sends Rusev over the ropes for another elimination!
Big E Langston eliminates Alexander Rusev
7. Alberto Del Rio w/Ricardo Rodriguez
As a former World Champion and Royal Rumble winner, Del Rio has to be considered dangerous in this match. He hits a nasty double foot stomp on Big E and trash talks the fans as they boo him out of the building. Bryan and Punk hit a Hart Attack on Del Rio to a massive pop!
8. Kevin Nash
It looks like The Authority have a couple of tricks up their sleeve tonight. Nash immediately targets Punk and Bryan, savouring the boo's from the audience. Meanwhile, Big E nearly has Del Rio eliminated until Rodriguez hops on the apron and allows Del Rio to get the advantage by jamming him thumb in Big E's eye! Del Rio kicks Big E in the face and eliminates the Intercontinental Champion!
Alberto Del Rio eliminates Big E Langston
Del Rio and Nash team up to beat down Punk and Bryan.
9. John Cena
Business is about to pick up! Cena hits the ring and takes the fight to Del Rio and Nash! AA to Del Rio! Nash immediately takes Cena down with a big boot and mocks the fans, pretending to cry. Jackknife Powerbomb to Cena! Nash tosses Punk over the ropes but Punk skins the cat and starts kicking Nash in his surgically repaired knee's.
10. Big Show
Nash throws Punk into the ring post and has a face off with The World's Largest Athlete. Nash extends his hand, wondering if Show is going to take The Authority up on their offer. Big Show teases joining him --- psych! Knockout Punch by Big Show! Nash crumples to the mat. The fans love it as Big Show gets hyped up and then starts chopping Del Rio in the corner.
11. X-Pac
Another surprise return! But is this another legend doing the bidding of The Authority? Pac does some crotch chops and gets a good reaction as he fist bumps The Big Show and hits a Bronco Buster to Del Rio! But X-Pac cannot be trusted as he kicks Big Show right in the family jewels! Kevin Nash pulls himself to his feet and two sweets X-Pac! Nash goes to stomping on The Big Show as Pac charges for a Bronco Buster on Punk ---- Cena takes X-Pac's head off with a clothesline and then AA's him from the ring!
John Cena eliminates X-Pac
Cena, Punk, and Bryan all attack Kevin Nash and buy enough time for Big Show to recover. Show grabs Nash by the throat and pushes him back over the ropes!
Big Show eliminates Kevin Nash
Show, Cena, Punk, Bryan, and Del Rio all fight and try to eliminate each other as the buzzer sounds for the next entrant.
12. Bray Wyatt
The mood has shifted in the arena! Bray Wyatt comes in like an absolute killer, wrecking everyone in his path. Sister Abigail to CM Punk! Daniel Bryan is the last one standing and the crowd breaks out into thunderous "YES!" chants as Bryan and Wyatt exchange stiff slaps and beat the piss out of each other!
13. Erick Rowan
A coincidence or the puppet strings of The Authority? The Wyatt Family now has two members and begin to dominate. Big Show grabs their throats but Rowan breaks free with several headbutts! Big Show slumps back against the ropes --- Wyatt and Rowan dump him to the floor!
Bray Wyatt and Erick Rowan eliminate Big Show
Wyatt sits in the corner moving his hands like a orchestra conductor as Rowan chokes Daniel Bryan on the opposite side of the ring. Del Rio tries to eliminate John Cena.
14. Brodus Clay
The Funkasaurus is in no dancing mood, he knows how serious this opportunity is and he also knows what he's up against. As soon as he slides in the ring, Wyatt and Rowan put the boots to him. Clay fights back but it's no use. It's Wyatt Family domination as Bray hits a Sister Abigail and then Rowan throws the big man over the ropes.
Erick Rowan eliminates Brodus Clay
CM Punk is Bray Wyatt's next target but he fights for his life and hits a big roundhouse kick to Rowan! Bray has to fend for himself and he smiles, it's time to dance!
15. Kofi Kingston
Kingston is a house of fire, flying all over the ring. SOS to Bray Wyatt! Trouble in Paradise to Del Rio! Kingston springboards off the ropes but gets caught by Erick Rowan! Rowan press slams Kofi to the outside ---- Kofi lands on the barricade! He trust falls back into the crowd and they surf him around as the arena breaks out into huge "KOFI!" chants.
16. Santino Marella
Santino breaks out THE COBRA! Wyatt does the creepy spider walk which freaks Santino out ---- he eliminates himself and walks to the back!
Santino Marella eliminates himself
17. Ezekiel Jackson
As Jackson walks down to the ring, the crowd bring Kofi back to the barricade and he hops to the apron! Bray Wyatt launches himself into Kofi, sending him flying into in the arms of Ezekiel Jackson! Kofi is all pumped up at avoiding elimination twice but Jackson bodyslams Kofi on the floor! Kofi is now out and Big Zeke has his first elimination before he even gets in the ring!
Ezekiel Jackson eliminates Kofi Kingston
Jackson joins the match and exchanges some shoulder blocks with Erick Rowan. Bray Wyatt continues to brawl with Daniel Bryan while John Cena fights Del Rio.
18. Christian
Captain Charisma joins the match and finds himself squaring off with his old rival Ezekiel Jackson. Jackson gets him up for a Powerslam but Christian fights out and hits the Killswitch! Christian then ducks a Bray Wyatt clothesline and hits a Spear! Del Rio cheapshots Christian and tells the fans to shut up as he chokes Captain Charisma in the corner.
19. Chris Jericho
Y2J makes quite the entrance with a boatload of pyro. Jericho slaps Del Rio and locks in the Walls of Jericho! The ring begins to fill up now as strategy changes this late into the match; nobody wants to risk elimination at this point.
20. The Boogeyman
JBL gets real quiet all of a sudden as the legend crawls out and smashes a clock on his head! Boogeyman gets in the ring and begins eating a handful of worms! This gets Bray Wyatt's attention and the two spooky guys have a staredown. The Eater of Worlds vs. The Eater of Worms. Boogeyman sets Wyatt up for the Pumphandle Slam but Erick Rowan boots him in the head and then tosses him from the ring!
Erick Rowan eliminates The Boogeyman
21. Fandango w/Summer Rae
As Fandango dances his way to the ring, Christian and Jericho team up to eliminate Ezekiel Jackson.
Christian and Chris Jericho eliminate Ezekiel Jackson
Fandango sets his sights on Jericho and shows a more vicious side of himself, stomping Y2J relentlessly. Bray Wyatt and Erick Rowan try to eliminate Christian.
22. Luke Harper
The Wyatt Family is now at full strength. They dominate the field and Luke Harper clotheslines Fandango off the apron!
Luke Harper eliminates Fandango
Bray instructs them to eliminate Bryan but Punk and Cena have something to say about that.
23. Bad News Barrett
As Barrett picks the most opportune time to enter, The Wyatt Family gang up on Christian and Bray Wyatt tosses him out!
Bray Wyatt eliminates Christian
Chris Jericho puts up a fight, nailing Rowan with a Codebreaker! The numbers game is still in The Wyatt Family's favour --- Harper decapitates Y2J with a clothesline, and Wyatt eliminates him as well!
Bray Wyatt eliminates Chris Jericho
The clock begins to countdown so Barrett is forced to roll in the ring and Harper attacks him.
24. Shelton Benjamin
AIN'T NO STOPPIN' ME, NOOOO! The Gold Standard makes his return to WWE and gets a nice ovation from the Pittsburgh crowd. He single handedly ends The Wyatt Family's domination by diving onto all three of them! As Bray Wyatt scurries to his feet, Shelton greets him with a T-Bone Suplex! Erick Rowan charges full speed at Daniel Bryan but Bryan avoids him by pulling the rope down and Rowan crashes to the floor!
Daniel Bryan eliminates Erick Rowan
Rowan is pissed and starts dismantling the announce table until the referee's force him to leave. The ring is full of superstars with full intentions of headlining Wrestlemania. Bryan and Punk are spent. Cena too. Del Rio hides in the corner to stay alive. Shelton battles it out with Barrett and Harper. Wyatt pulls himself to his feet.
25. Batista
THE ANIMAL IS HERE! Batista is a one man wrecking crew. Spinebuster to Luke Harper! Batista Bomb to Barrett! Del Rio sneaks up and attempts to toss Batista out but The Animal reverses his momentum and eliminates Del Rio!
Batista eliminates Alberto Del Rio
Batista and Bray Wyatt lock eyes. Wyatt loves it and yells "Show me that Animal, David!" Batista crushes him with a Spear and then finds himself face to face with John Cena. Cena is much more exhausted and ends up getting Spinebustered for his troubles.
26. Roman Reigns
The powerhouse of The Shield enters the ring with bad intentions; Spear to Shelton Benjamin! Superman Punch to Daniel Bryan! Reigns and Batista do battle until Wyatt and Harper attack them ---- Batista and Reigns hit a pair of Spears to The Wyatt Family!
27. Dolph Ziggler
Ziggler comes down with a microphone and tells everyone in the ring that this is his year. Number 27 is the most coveted position as more people have won the Rumble from this spot than any other. He smashes Batista with the microphone and unloads punches on The Animal! Dolph with a Superkick to Barrett and a Zig Zag to John Cena! 10 superstars are left in the ring with 3 more to make their entrance.
28. Seth Rollins
The Architect of The Shield is here and he joins Roman Reigns as they go face to face with Wyatt and Harper! Electricity in the air folks! Things break down; Bray and Roman fight in the corner as Harper drops Rollins with a clothesline! John Cena hoists Luke Harper up and sends him to the floor with an AA!
John Cena eliminates Luke Harper
Bad News Barrett sneaks up and dumps Cena from the ring! John Cena is eliminated! Revenge for The Nexus at last!
Bad News Barrett eliminates John Cena
29. Sheamus
The Celtic Warrior imediately Brogue Kicks Shelton off the apron!
Sheamus eliminates Shelton Benjamin
Everyone fights as the clock counts down for our final entrant.
30. Brock Lesnar w/Paul Heyman
Now we know what Triple H gifted Paul Heyman earlier! The Beast enters the ring and F5's Bad News Barrett to the floor!
Brock Lesnar eliminates Bad News Barrett
Dolph Ziggler jumps on Brock's back and tries to choke him out but Lesnar reverses into an F5 position! Lesnar sends Dolph flying over the ropes!
Brock Lesnar eliminates Dolph Ziggler
Lesnar now targets Batista and hits a series of shoulder blocks in the corner. He picks The Animal up for an F5 but Batista fights out and clotheslines Brock out of the ring!!!
Batista eliminates Brock Lesnar
Brock is in shock along with the announcers and everyone in the arena. He starts pacing around the ring as Batista sets Bray Wyatt up for a Batista Bomb. Lesnar shoves the referee to the ground and slides back in the ring, tossing Batista out!
Brock Lesnar eliminates Batista
Lesnar smashes Batista with the steel steps and then F5's The Animal through the announce table! We're down to five as Rollins and Punk fight on the apron until Punk hits a GTS! Rollins crumbles unconscious to the floor!
CM Punk eliminates Seth Rollins
The final four of the 2014 Royal Rumble: CM Punk, Daniel Bryan, Bray Wyatt, and Roman Reigns. Punk and Bryan entered at number 1 and 2. Incredible accomplishment for them. Roman Reigns Spears Daniel Bryan and then sidesteps Bray Wyatt, sending him flying from the ring!
Roman Reigns eliminates Bray Wyatt
CM Punk hits a GTS on Reigns and all three men are down. Triple H walks down to the ring and rips his jacket off. Kane follows behind him. Punk pulls himself to his feet as tells them to bring it. Randy Orton RKO's CM Punk out of nowhere! The WWE Champion soaks in the boo's as he and Kane throw CM Punk out! "This is bullshit" yells the fans and JR agrees!
Randy Orton and Kane eliminate CM Punk
Triple H smiles and grabs the sledgehammer. Orton and Kane hold Daniel Bryan as HHH charges with the hammer ---- Roman Reigns Spears Triple H! CM Punk pulls Orton from the ring and they brawl into the crowd! Daniel Bryan takes Kane out with the YES+ Knee! With everyone out of the equation, Reigns and Bryan get three minutes of back and forth action, a proper finish to the Rumble. Reigns gets locked in a triangle choke but shows tremendous strength, lifting Bryan up and over the ropes! Bryan holds onto Roman and drags him over with him! They battle on the apron until Bryan viciously kicks Roman in the head! Reigns falls to the floor! Daniel Bryan wins the 2014 Royal Rumble!
Daniel Bryan eliminates Roman Reigns
Winner of the 2014 Royal Rumble: Daniel Bryan
Fireworks explode as Daniel Bryan leads the fans in a YES chant and points at the Wrestlemania sign.

I started work at ShawbRyt a week ago and am already Team Lead for Night Collections, the first female Team Lead for this district. Name’s Charley. Wish I could say what we collect for but I don’t care so I never asked. All I know is, my team only accepts cash. No debit, no credit, no cheques, no body parts, just paper cash issued by our government. And we get a lot of it, every day, brought in by muscular people who I think got it from other people. That’s all I know. But that amount of cash means someone from the team has to make a bank deposit at the end of every shift.
Today (well, tonight really, since it’s night shift) the district manager told me to take Kedgewick with me when I go to the bank. That way I wouldn’t be the only one on the Team that knows how to make the deposit and so that I’m not going alone. That isn’t him being sexist. The previous Team Lead was a guy and he disappeared while doing a night deposit so I guess it’s good for business. Even if it isn’t good for business, I don’t care. Not my business.
Kedge is new, he’s only been with us two days. He’s a jeans, T-shirt and blazer kinda guy. Brand name athletic shoes; today’s were red. No tie. Blond hair, slightly messy, no beard or mustache or earring. Always somewhat nervous and a lot annoying but I get paid to do what I’m told, not to ask questions.
At the appointed time, which I’m not going to say for security reasons, I tapped Kedge on the shoulder of his irritatingly clean white T-shirt. The kid jumped like I’d shoved a gun in his face.
“Deposit time,” I whispered.
He looked at me like I was kidnapping him.
I pointed to the gray blazer on the back of his chair. “We gotta go.”
He kept staring at me while he put on his jacket.
Once outside, I pointed to the bank, two blocks away. “Ever made a night deposit?”
He kept staring. I realized he might think I was propositioning him.
I held the deposit slip in front of his face to make sure he saw it. “See this? There’s 1,000 fives, 400 tens, 500 twenties, 120 fifties and 50 hundreds in the pouch. Thirty grand. Just like the total. Sign here.” I handed him a pen, hoping he knew how to use it and turned so he could use my back as a table. I kept a tight grip on the deposit pouch until he was done, then opened the pouch so he could put the slip inside.
He hesitated before releasing the paper. “We don’t keep a copy?”
“Got one in the office.” I grabbed the paper, jammed it into the pouch then sealed it shut. “We gotta go.”
He mostly kept up with me on the way to the bank. I slowed down as we approached and handed the pouch to him. “The night deposit box is inside those doors on the left. The door opens when you put this card,” I gave him my deposit card, “into the slot on the left of the door, see it? Then pull the deposit box handle, throw this in, slam it shut and come out. Any questions?”
He shook his head, looking about as confused as when I told him to put on his jacket. But he did head towards the door so I stood on the corner, wondering how long it would take for the guy already in the bank to finish and get out of Kedge’s way. The guy in the bank was hard to miss. He was wearing white jeans and a white jacket with a white cowboy hat. I started humming a Bee Gees' tune.
I stopped humming when movement a couple of yards up the street caught my attention. A man dressed in black walked out from behind a streetlight pole. I say behind, but it was more like he was the streetlight pole, because once he started walking, there was no more light, no more pole. I know it was dark but how was the pole there one second and gone the next?
That’s a good example of why I’m better off sticking to following orders, not asking questions. In the time it took me to wonder about the pole, the man walked up to the guy coming out of the bank and shot him twice through the head and twice thru the chest.
I couldn’t breathe or move. I watched in horror as the man grabbed the dead body by the shoulders. At the first touch, the man in black's wardrobe changed to white jeans and jacket. He even had a white cowboy hat. All without removing the dead guy's clothes. He threw the original man in white into the back parking lot's dumpster without so much as a grunt.
Kedge’s very loud running commentary snapped me back into action. "Did you see that? He killed that guy! Did you see that? He threw that guy away! Did you see that? He is that guy now!"
The man in black, now the man in white, might lack fashion sense but he had street smarts. He whipped around and stared at Kedge who then screamed, "He's looking at me! What should I do? Charley!"
At least I think that’s what Kedge was yelling. As soon as I saw the murderer pointing his gun at us, I ran towards the building across the street. Before Kedge finished yelling, I jumped over the fence to that building's parking lot. Once there, I looked back and saw Kedge following me, aiming a gun right at me. A bullet flew past me, grazing my arm. It hurt like the last time I got shot, and I dropped the damn deposit pouch.
I took a sharp right and zigzagged my way up the street behind buildings to the nearest main road. At some point, Kedge stopped following me which made things worse. The more I ran, the more my fear ramped up. It didn’t feel right, seeing a man commit murder, then Kedge trying to kill me and then they both disappear? Not right at all.
It was so wrong, I stopped running at the intersection of Gardiner Drive and Hornpot Lane. The light facing me was red and, well, my lungs, arm and legs were aching. My arm wasn't bleeding but it felt like it was on fire. I took a second to look at it and noticed something moving in the forsythia bush down the street, close enough to see under the street lights along Gardiner.
It was Kedge. He had the gun. He shot at me as he tripped and fell out of the bush.
My legs started pumping and everything around me became a blur. I was in the elevator in my apartment building before I noticed anything else and by then I was gasping for breath.
Kedge missed me, I'm not sure how. Every creak the elevator made sounded like a gunshot to me, all the way to the third floor. My hands shook so bad it took several tries to get the key in the door lock and I kept checking over my shoulders the whole time. I almost turned on the lights when I got inside but realized that wasn’t normal for most people at this time of night. I felt my way to the balcony door and made sure it was locked with curtains drawn.
My sofa is now behind the door to the apartment hallway. Not wanting to smell up the bedsheets and too sore to change them, I tossed a blanket on the sofa before lying down on it. Maybe everyone else would take a shower then listen to a podcast or two before sleep. But this is the middle of the night for people working “normal” hours. Building management said I get thrown out the next time I piss off my neighbors by showering this time of night, so I won’t.
Just as my heart beat was slowing, things took a bad turn. Which is why I'm sending this, in case — look, things could get worse.
Someone's knocking on my door. In the middle of the night. In an apartment building where I'll be up for eviction if there's one more complaint from a neighbor.
I've looked out the peephole. I can describe the person perfectly. His blond hair is slightly messy. He's wearing a blood-stained white T-shirt, jeans and a gray blazer. No tie, beard, mustache or earring. Red athletic shoes, one with the shoelace undone.
He's smiling. He's holding a gun.
I called Emergency Services and they said they'll be here soon. No, they could not define soon. I need to stay put and wait for them.
But the guy at my door won't stop smiling or knocking. And I'm afraid he's going to get in and I'll never get out again.