Had the flu now hurts to cough

In my previous post, which actually performed surprisingly well, I showed stickers that I made for the various countries on the SMP, there are many of them which didn’t exist at the same time (for instance, L’Manburg was over before Las Nevadas, Snowchester) officially formed, this post will be kind of just fun theorizing about how a “world war” on the SMP with all factions would have gone.
If you happened to miss my last post, the factions that I made flags for were Greater Dream SMP, Syndicate, L’Manburg, Las Nevadas, Eggpire, Manifold Land, Snowchester, Kinoko Kingdom, Badlands.
In terms of membership, their members would be the following.
Greater Dream SMP - Dream, Punz, Eret (the king), Callahan (the squire), all unaffiliated members by default
Syndicate - Techno (rest in peace), Philza, Ranboo, Niki Nihachu
L’Manburg - Tommy, Tubbo (dual citizenship) Wilbur
Las Nevadas - Quackity, Sam, Purpled (traitor), Slimecicle (traitor), Foolish, Fundy (absent)
Eggpire - Bad, Ant, Ponk, Punz (double affiliated), Hannah
Manifold Land - Jack
Snowchester - Tubbo (dual citizenship), Jack (dual citizenship)
Kinoko Kingdom - Karl, Sapnap, George, Tina
Badlands - Bad, Ant, Sam, Puffy
If the war were to take place in a period of time after Dream was put in and then subsequently broke out of the prison, we can presume that Greater Dream SMP would be at a pretty significant disadvantage, they were already substantially weakened when Dream had went to prison, Punz had went into hiding and later temporarilu joined the Eggpire, Eret was left in charge over what was essentially nothing, since Dream is now back, there would be a short period of instability until eventually he deposes the king and makes himself the leader again, even given his longstanding hostility towards L’Manburg, his first target would be Las Nevadas (given Quackity torturing him), he would attempt to get the Syndicate to ally with him, especially considering their generally rocky relationship with Las Nevadas themselves, and he would likely succeed in this endeavor, a Greater Dream SMP-Syndicate unlimited alliance would easily be able to take on the rest of the SMP (just like Dream + Techno/Philza during doomsday).
If this were the case, given their history, it’s likely that L’Manburg-Snowchester would ally with Las Nevadas against the Greater Dream SMP-Syndicate alliance, or otherwise stay neutral but supportive of Las Nevadas, this isn’t particularly surprising given the hostile relationship with Dream as well as generally friendly relations with Quackity, given the leadership alone it’s very clear why L’Manburg would ally with Las Nevadas, an important thing to note would be the involvement of Purpled, who would still stab Quackity in the back, allying with Dream, this would be a significant strategic deficit since he’s very aware from being on the inside just what Las Nevadas’ firepower is.
In this hypothetical, the placement of the Eggpire would also be interesting, generally I think they would be inclined to ally with Greater Dream SMP, however, they’re in very direct ideological conflict with the Syndicate, we’ve seen the important members of these groups work together previously (when Wilbur blew up L’Manburg the first time and then Techno turned against them, trying to instill anarchism, Dream, Sapnap, Punz, and the Badlands supported him).
If these were the battle lines, this would place Kinoko Kingdom at a very interesting spot as well, they would most likely opt to stay neutral since their whole thing is peace, but if they had to pick a side, it would be hard to imagine they would side with Las Nevadas or the L’Manburg-Las Nevadas alliance (given hostile relations with Quackity in particular), when Sapnap informed Karl about the prison break, he seemed on the whole to be less worried about the threat this poses to their country (perhaps with his memory loss he forgot about Dream), whereas the situation with Quackity is more immediate, on the whole supporting the Greater Dream SMP would mean supporting a “stable” status quo, Sapnap in particular would likely defect and help the L’Manburg-Las Nevadas alliance.
If these were the battle lines, the two sides would look something like this:
Greater Dream SMP-Syndicate-Eggpire alliance - Dream (wants to take out Quackity) - Punz (wants to support Dream) - Philza (is against L’Manburg reforming and by extension Las Nevadas) - Niki Nihachu (hates Wilbur) - Karl (on the surface supports Greater Dream SMP) - Purpled (betrays Las Nevadas) - Bad (supports Dream, represents Eggpire) - Ant (supports Dream, represents Eggpire) - Ponk (supports Dream, represents Eggpire) - Hannah (hypnotized by the Eggpire, supports whatever they support)
L’Manburg-Las Nevadas alliance - Tommy (hates Dream + is opposed to Eggpire) - Tubbo (wants to support Tommy) - Wilbur (wants to blow up everything) - Quackity (has positive relationships with L’Manburg + hates Dream) - Sapnap (hates Dream + supports Tommy-Tubbo) - Foolish (wants to support Quackity, might be swayed by Dream) - Sam (possibly out of commission) - Puffy (recognizes the wrongdoing of Dream + naturally against whatever the Eggpire is for)
In this case, the battle lines seem to be drawn, likely the major confrontation would take place inside Las Nevadas territory wherein Tommy finds out that Quackity tortured Dream, since Tommy is supposed to represent the moral good of the server, this can’t be something he would support, therefore, the L’Manburg-Las Nevadas alliance would fall apart from the inside, meaning the Greater Dream SMP-Syndicate-Eggpire would probably win, successfully blowing up L’Manburg again as well as Las Nevadas (likely with Wilbur’s support).
If this were to happen, eventually we would get the same Tommy finale where Tubbo (on behalf of Snowchester) nukes the prison, subsequently taking out Greater Dream SMP, meaning that Syndicate vs Eggpire would likely fight for the remainder of the SMP, with all those not affiliated likely fighting for scraps.
If the final battle was Syndicate vs Eggpire, then it’s likely either the Syndicate would win, succeeding in their goal to free the SMP from authoritarianism (primarily because they have superior firepower, as well as likely Sapnap joining) OR they would reach a tactical stalemate, Syndicate frees the majority of the SMP, though Eggpire maintains power over much of the main area.
In order to save the SMP, perhaps Sapnap would use his “death book” to kill Bad, Ant, Ponk, since he has three canon lives, one canon life would be given in exchange for one permanent death, this would finish off the Eggpire since their only remaining member would be Hannah, who would likely go into hiding.
There wouldn’t be peace, however, there would never be peace, while the war reached a standstill, everyone is hurting.

I let a sinus infection get too bad thinking it was seasonal allergies about a month ago. I finished 10 days of amoxicillin 5/3.
My two toddlers started feeling bad last week, and both tested positive for the flue this past Friday 5/17. I had started to feel bad the day or so before.
Today I finally felt on the mend and throughout the day my severe congestion lessened, once it was almost completely gone my sinuses started feeling bruised, throbbing and swelling.
My eyes nose and sinuses in my upper and lower cheek area plus my teeth all hurt worse than any sinus infection I’ve ever had. It’s enough to make m6 eyes water an$ I’m not usually one to be a baby about pain.
I know sinus infections are rarely emergencies but does my recent infection plus the flu and now severe pain and throbbing warrant a visit?
I don’t want to take up a room if not necessary but I do want the pain to go away I’m not sure if I’ll make it through the night at this point.

Hi !
I am a 19F, and I am too sensitive and come across as childish, because of my personality. I cannot argue with someone close, like my family, without crying.
Long contextualisation here, sorry in advance. This is more of a vent post looking for advice.
I was the cliché weird girl, ugly, curly hair and glasses, with no friends and who didn’t understood what was going on half of the time. I got bullied in preschool and sometimes over the years. I am ashamed, but I got violent when people were mocking me, and when we argued, because I was sad and didn’t knew what to do. Still am today to some extent. I was very unhappy when in public and in school, borderline embarrassed of existing, hating myself, but it got way better as a teen.
I grew up, I am social, I have very good friends, I am funny, I am way better, and sometimes I can’t believe how far I’ve got from the old me. I am very proud of myself on that. But I don’t have a lot of "life experience", with how I was so isolated before. I would say that I have three years of real "life experience". It felt like coming out of the fog or something.
Now, I am not someone that takes things at heart, or too personally. I like to think that I am pretty level headed. I never cried in front of my friends, except for something very serious or because we were watching a sad movie.
However, when I am alone or with my family, it is different. I just can’t help it, and I immediately cry when :
-I am embarrassed about myself - when I don’t have any great comeback when arguing - I am angry and the person I am arguing with doesn’t care and use it to make fun of me - when I think about something sad or someone going through intense emotional pain
But I never cry in public.
My close family is very different from me on this aspect, my parents are loving and supportive but they are not as sensitive.
The other day I argued with my father over lunch. It wasn’t because of something I did, he just got angry by himself and was being unfair and quite frankly ruining the meal, so I intervened. When he started jabbing at me, I left the table, because it was the end of the meal and my siblings already left. I was pissed, but didn’t want to cry. My father said "yeah right, go cry".
It’s not much. Worse things happens in life
(like when I had Cushing disease and nobody believed me until I went to the doctors alone lol)
But I got so angry. Because my little sister says the same thing when we argue. Because she never cry and I cry, well, often.
She doesn’t likes me. When I come home she never talks to me, seeing me makes her angry. She is the kind of pretty, very opinionated girl who would have bullied the hell out of me if we were in the same grade. We joked about this before. She is also f ing rude and probably hasn’t cried in years.
There have been instances of my dad and sister telling my that I act and behave childishly, my mother too. It’s true that I can be sometimes, but I am not childish about serious things, not about how I treat people, or live my life, or with my studies.
And besides why can’t I be childish with my FAMILY, in my own home, with my parents when I am literally their CHILD ? Like, I am the child that is "wise beyond its years" when I talk about serious things with my parents, when we talk about life and philosophy.
There is a big difference with how I act day-to-day with close family members, joyful and frankly dumb, and with how I am when it comes to serious subjects. And they get to see both of these sides of me, often. Which is why it hurts even more when they call me childish and they all agree with it.
I feel they don’t take me seriously, because I am the sensitive, cry easily artsy former-victim child. And I hate this. Because I can’t argue without crying, and when I don’t cry I don’t know how to respond and my arguments are weak. And I look pathetic. Even if we love each other very much and have healthy relationships.
I am sorry for the extensive rent, but i feel like it was needed so that you could give me some advice on how to be less sensitive, cry less and appear less childish, I guess, based on this context.
Sorry for over sharing, and for my English, it is not my first language
thanks you :D

TLDR: Irrationally texted my ex parents after a breakup saying mean shit about her no threats just emotional dumb shit. Regret how childish I came off and feel like part of my healing even to move on fully is apologizing to grow. But I don’t want to bother as other redditors have exclaimed I should be lucky no restraining orders have been put out or I’m not in jail. I admit I said ugly shit but nothing that comes to threats or harm. Lmk please
Ex texted a bestfriend behind my back ending of last year ruining the friendship. Broke up with her, during that time I rekindled with someone else while occasionally texting my ex still not back together. Felt like I missed the warmth of my ex and dropped the new girl going back to my ex fully beginning of this year. Missed the support and love from my ex that I never truly got. Girl told me ex about our dirty laundry, causing trust issues in the whole relationship. Trust me when I tell you I felt more than guilty. I balled my eyes out with her and not even for getting caught for the reaction she had and how fragile she always was to me. I mention what she had does because stupidly I should have left when I had the chance. Even other instances where she had initiated things, I knew it might have not been the healthiest but she showed other signs of real true love. Tried fixing them by removing girls, sharing location, etc. I felt scared my ex is gonna get revenge and started being distant at the end which pushed her away as well. I thought we would get back together as always, found out she’s been adding guys she removed a long time ago. I got upset and texted her ugly nasty shit, and texted her dad saying his daughter is nasty etc. I thought by doing this I’d move on quicker by burning bridges, he told me to leave them alone I’m being childish. I understand I fucked up and fully agree. She’s done things and I know I shouldn’t have let be, but staying and getting revenge wasn’t the way. I’m realizing that as the hours even go by everyday I think about it. I want to apologize to the parents for the lack of character I had because I never ONCE disrespected them in their house, to their face. I called them Mr and Mrs always and always asked if they needed anything. I talked to a close female friend who said this stuff needs time and I can apologize if I’d like and if it makes me feel better, or write a letter and burn it. My parents said that’s not my character and said apologize if you feel necessary as I wasn’t raised like that. I feel like it’s too late to backtrack on the stupid shit I said. Am I being selfish by sending a text? I just want this weight off my chest of being the shitty person at the end at least to her parents who didn’t need any of that.
Is it smart to reach back out to the parents to show respect as an adult or just let them be? I know this was a lot but it’s on my heart and brain everyday since. I just felt hurt cause she said she wouldn’t seek revenge but the moment we had stopped talking she acted like I meant nothing. I understand now I have done the same to her in the past and maybe this is her way of moving on but still not ok with the way my character was at the end.

I, 29 (f), have been best friends with my 29 (m) childhood friend for nearly our whole lives. he announced on social media last year he got engaged to his partner (m), and i reached out to tell him how happy i was for him and couldn’t wait to celebrate. fast forward a few months, I started noticing him posting things about his wedding website. I reached out to him, because I saw that his wedding was going to be overseas. I wanted to make sure that he had my new address for my invitation (never doubted being invited as he came to my wedding), so I texted him and I told him hey if you need my new address just let me know, he texted me back and said don’t worry you and your plus one will have an invitation in the mail.
fast forward all of these months later, his wedding is next week, and I was never invited. He’s been posting relentlessly on social media between his wedding shower, and all of his other friends from childhood and college coming to the wedding, and now leading up to the wedding next week, everyone I know has been posting about it. i’ve had to see this for months now.
I have not reached out to him to ask him why he did not invite me, I guess I’ve just been afraid of what he might say or what the reason might be, because I truly do not understand why, but I just feel like this is such a huge slap in the face and his way of, intentionally ending our friendship after all of these years.
What doesn’t make sense - Is that six years ago at my wedding, he and his future husband came to our wedding and stayed for several days, and we spent a lot of time together and made some great memories. I never saw our friendship ending, we’ve known each other since before we could barely talk, I never realized that I didn’t fit in his life anymore. But over the last few months and seeing him shamelessly posting about his wedding, never reaching out to me once, it just seems like he’s intentionally trying to hurt me and to let me know that this friendship is over. I’m not sure what to do, or if I should wait until after the wedding to say something. But it’s been incredibly hurtful to see all of these things on social media leading up to his wedding, knowing that I never got invited, even though he assured me that my invitation would be in the mail.

Throw away account bc privacy. For a very long time, i (20m) have struggled with a corn addiction. I had two relationships prior to the one i am in now, and my problem never came up as an issue. to be clear I am well aware the harm this addiction does to me, and regardless find myself having the urge to stop. Because my first two relationships never required that I quit, I didnt. All the while, however, completly ashamed of myself and lied to everyone about the severity of my problem. My current girlfriend asked if i watched porn and made it clear how disgusting she thought it was, and shamefully, I lied to her about the fact that I did. this continued for a while and my problem did not get better. there was a period in our relationship that I paid for onlyfans. There is no excuse for that, Im still not sure why i thought it was a good idea, but i did it anyway. one day she found out and became reasonably upset over the fact that not only do i actually watch porn and lied about it, but also that I had bought an onlyfans while we were dating. this led to a week or so of unsteadyness before she decided to break up with me. I was devestated and really wanted to quit, but kept falling back into it (although not nearly at the rate that i was consuming before, 1-2 times a day to 1-2 times over 5 days). Five days later she talked to me and said she wanted to get back together with me, but if i watched porn she would break up with me again. it has been almost a month since we got back together I watched porn 3 times. I felt like it was fine because it wasnt a video or even of a real person, but she found out, and is now (reasonably) furious with me again and hurt that i kept it from her for a second time. I really do love my girlfriend and want to be with her for as long as possible if not forever, and I feel like even though I continued watching corn, the fact that i was doing so less and less was progress. She doesnt think so. As im writing this I am realizing how stupid my question is and i know that i completly disregarded the boundary that she put up, but is there anything I can do to keep my girlfriend?

I (36F) am estranged from my Father. Or more, he quit speaking to me after I tried to hold him accountable for living a double life. Christmas morning of 2020 I saw on my father's phone that he was IG messaging a woman "Melisa" she was saying she was on her way to his hotel room and brought snacks. They told each other "I love you" and had nicknames for one another. This is a problem because my Father had been married to my mother for 40 years and was married to her still at the time. They were high-school sweethearts and he acted like they had a great marriage. He travels to one particular city for 2 weeks each month and that is where Melisa lives. She worked at the hospital where he was a Dr. I didn't say anything that morning because I didn't want to ruin Christmas for my mother and sister (40F). I confronted him the following day, he begged me not to tell my mother and he said he would end it. When I found out later that he did not, I told my mother and sister.
A lot came out following this. My father had been fired from the hospital, and was taking money out of his and my mother's home in order to pretend to my mother that he was still working at the hospital and getting a paycheck. He is a compulsive liar and has told people things including: he was injured in the war (he has never been to war), he played college football (untrue), he funded several companies (also untrue), he's a millionaire (def not true), he was on a Federal govt board of health (of course again untrue), etc. My parents got divorced because of this affair. It was also not the only affair he had during their marriage, as we would also learn.
My father was very abusive to my mother and myself when I was growing up, particularly in highschool (berating, screaming, vicious verbal abuse, gaslighting, threatening, etc). I begged my mom to leave him but she couldn't. My sister didn't experience as much of this because she was in college. I confronted my father after the divorce was final to tell him how unbelievably hurt I was by all of his actions. He said he would try to earn back my trust and rebuild our relationship. He began texting me semi-regularly with simple nice messages. It took a while, but eventually I began responding and telling him bits about my life and opening that door again. In Sept, I took a 3-month job out of the country (and told him so). I was very busy and didn't respond as frequently, however I did still respond. In December we texted off and on and on Christmas Eve and I sent a particular message wishing him a happy holiday. Fast forward the next day to Christmas Day and my father not only sent my sister a lavish gift, but also messaged her and not me. I asked him why and he did not respond. My sister asked him why and he proceeded to tell her that I had NEVER responded to his texts in the last year and that I had abused HIM by not texting him and for the things I said way back when I originally confronted him. Basically, made himself the victim in every which way. I of course, showed my sister all the texts I had sent to him to show her that he was lying about this.
He continues to only message her and has not texted me since that day (Christmas Eve 2023). I am beyond hurt by this, it feels like I am hurt all over again by everything. It makes me angry and sad and in disbelief that after the abuse I went through with him growing up, after the copious amount of lies, the affair, and what he put my mother through (she cried every single day for a year after the divorce and was completely shattered) that he could do this to me. My sister still talks to him via text. This has cause a lot of turmoil for me. My sister and I are EXTREMELY close. We run a business together and are absolutely best friends. But she knows what he has done to me and how much I have been devastated by this. She said that she can't not talk to him because she still wants to have a father. Which I am trying to understand. But how can she want a relationship when she knows how much damage he has done to supposedly the most important person in her life (me, her sister). He also still helps her a bit financially here and there and I know this is partly (perhaps wholly the reason). She has now gotten him a Father's Day present and I don't know how to be ok with this. It feels like her maintaining this surface level relationship with him is a tacit endorsement of his treatment of me. I know he definitely thinks of it as such as well. I am angry at her for this and can't let it go. We spend so much time together and she's still maintaining a relationship with the person who has hurt me immeasurably. AITA for not wanting a relationship with my sister over this, or at the very least taking a massive step back from her? Our friends are divided.

My(I am 20M and she is 20F) ex girlfriend is coming to my place to pick up some mail concerning things from the government because she doesn’t have an address in the US that she can use for mail at the moment. I don’t mind letting her use it. We were together for 2 years.
To sum up our relationship, amazing first year and was perfect especially with senior year of highschool in the middle of it, afterwards I developed really selfish and narcissistic tendencies and I hurt her by making her feel unimportant. I know what I did and I want to be how I was in the beginning again. But anyways, after that, two months ago we broke up. She checked in on me and we had a couple stays together, slept together, and I thought I could fix things but she told me she didn’t want me to be there for her, she wants to be herself and be independent, and she doesn’t want me to be there except for our cat-child that I raised with her towards the end of our relationship.
Now after all that i see she’s getting important mail and I never got to tell her that I’m going to change and that I realized I was selfish and a narcissistic asshole. I want to say that I will be the person I was before because I know that’s who I am truly inside.
As for why i became that way, I prioritized a career over her and I also let my ex girl best friend (my age) know way too much about our relationship and I talked to her too fluently. I’ve erased those things from my life realizing just how important she was and I’m going to keep it that way no matter what.
With the last interactions me and this girl had, the last two visits I feel like I showed profoundly that I wanted to fix things because she’s extremely precious to me and she herself told me I was doing really well, and then she hit me with that “I don’t want a relationship.” “I can’t be in a relationship with you.” She named reasons like I don’t actually miss her, just her presence, I just want the old version of her, saying that I somewhere said I can’t be as good as I was for her in the beginning..
All things I’m not sure were accurate at all but I understand that her experience with me is entirely influential about how she thinks I feel.
To get back to the point, she’s coming to see me for a split second for the mail, I’ve been in no contact for 2weeks and had to break it for this, but I want to do something.
As foolish as it sounds and my friends told me I shouldn’t but I want to get her a gift, some flowers, and I have letters I want to give her and give her the freedom of taking and reading them if she wants to, letters about my reflection of my mistakes and how much I want her back, what I want to change and etc. Things of that nature. And of course say things about my narcissism and that I’m working on it. She told me she misses the old me and I know that’s who I really am, I’d do anything to show her that. I was a selfless lover who truly loved her and I regret everything.
Should I give that to her? To clarify, I really don’t want anything from her at all. If anything it’s just an act of affection for damn near no reason and then the letters I hope she reads and understands that I want to change, whether she reconsiders the relationship or not. I’m going to keep no contact afterwards anyway..
But I’m on the fence about it because while I don’t think she’ll take it as a broken boundary, and I’m scared that she might just be waiting for me to show signs of change or effort or anything. I’m scared doing NOTHING is actually the wrong choice.
Any advice at all is appreciated. I really want things to work out with her, the problems in our relationship are being worked on, on my end and I’m taking responsibility for everything that happened, but I still want to make logical and respectful decisions. I just feel like this risk is worth it, I believe having loved over not loving at all is greater than not loving given the opportunity to..
Sorry for the Yapping session.
(P.S I’ve realized I get immature in these situations and I’m getting advice here to make sure I do the right thing because I want that to change too.)

So I had a chest X-ray done two weeks ago now for a persistent cough (off and on for two years now). The dr office called a week later (not the dr just reception) and asked me to come in for a t spine fracture query. I’ve had no trauma and I’m 34. I asked if it was urgent and they said no and booked me in a week later. I’m freaking out. Everything I read says it’s often the first indication of cancer.
Anyone have any similar experiences??

I just had someone message me asking if they can post a meme they made in a group chat that has 70+ people in it. Not gonna go into detail but basically the meme was making fun of me for a decision that I made and I how its similar to decisions i’ve made a few times before.
Gonna be honest I didn’t want them to post it. I looked at it and thought about it for an entire 5 minutes and I wanted to say no, but then I worried that I was being too sensitive and that my sensitivity was ruining their fun. I started overthinking about what they might think of me and worried that they might not feel comfortable making jokes around me anymore if I said no, so I let them post it. I was initially going to title this post “I’m way too sensitive to jokes and I feel like it makes people not want to be around me” because things like this have happened before and I always feel like I shouldn’t be upset about the thing that I’m upset about.
But at this point I don’t care about the joke itself - Now I’m just fucking kicking myself for not setting a boundary like I should’ve. All I had to do was say no. I didn’t even have to give an explanation. I could’ve just replied “No” and the person would’ve understood because they’re respectful with boundaries, but I didn’t and now it’s too late. Asking them to delete it looks too suspicious to everyone in the group chat.
This shit just makes me so furious. I hate that other people are allowed to set boundaries all they want against me and yet I can’t do it back to them, because if I do, then I end up regretting it and soiling the friendship and things are worse for me overall. This has happened to me multiple times in the past. Either I do nothing about what’s bothered me and build resentment, or I set a boundary and end up regretting it because it’s made the friendship awkward and made them less comfortable making jokes around me. Sometimes I think the former is GENUINELY better. I do remember a time in my life where someone was disrespecting me, yet when I think back on it I just think to myself “thank God i didn’t set a boundary about that” because I think that doing so would’ve soiled that friendship.
It just makes me so sad because I feel like this is common in my life, in multiple groups. I can tell that when certain people speak to me that they’re more respectful and less jokey that they are around other people and it makes me feel like we’re not really friends or that there’s some kind of distance between us, and it makes me feel bad because it feels like I’ve stunted them and that I’m not fun to be around. It makes me feel like there’s something wrong with me.
I don’t know what to do now. People are reacting to the meme and making fun of it and I just have to take it. I don’t feel like I’m allowed to get mad at it because I said yes. If this is still bothering me by tomorrow then I want to tell them how I feel about this and how I think I should’ve said no, but I’m worried that I’m only doing that to make them feel guilty as a way of getting back at them for hurting me.
TLDR: I wanted to set a boundary but I didn’t because I convinced myself that I was being way too sensitive, and now I regret not setting the boundary and have built up resentment towards myself and the other person. Please help me decide what to do next.

I just had someone message me asking if they can post a meme they made in a group chat that has 70+ people in it. Not gonna go into detail but basically the meme was making fun of me for a decision that I made and I how its similar to decisions i’ve made a few times before.
Gonna be honest I didn’t want them to post it. I looked at it and thought about it for an entire 5 minutes and I wanted to say no, but then I worried that I was being too sensitive and that my sensitivity was ruining their fun. I started overthinking about what they might think of me and worried that they might not feel comfortable making jokes around me anymore if I said no, so I let them post it. I was initially going to title this post “I’m way too sensitive to jokes and I feel like it makes people not want to be around me” because things like this have happened before and I always feel like I shouldn’t be upset about the thing that I’m upset about.
But at this point I don’t care about the joke itself - Now I’m just fucking kicking myself for not setting a boundary like I should’ve. All I had to do was say no. I didn’t even have to give an explanation. I could’ve just replied “No” and the person would’ve understood because they’re respectful with boundaries, but I didn’t and now it’s too late. Asking them to delete it looks too suspicious to everyone in the group chat.
This shit just makes me so furious. I hate that other people are allowed to set boundaries all they want against me and yet I can’t do it back to them, because if I do, then I end up regretting it and soiling the friendship and things are worse for me overall. This has happened to me multiple times in the past. Either I do nothing about what’s bothered me and build resentment, or I set a boundary and end up regretting it because it’s made the friendship awkward and made them less comfortable making jokes around me. Sometimes I think the former is GENUINELY better. I do remember a time in my life where someone was disrespecting me, yet when I think back on it I just think to myself “thank God i didn’t set a boundary about that” because I think that doing so would’ve soiled that friendship.
It just makes me so sad because I feel like this is common in my life, in multiple groups. I can tell that when certain people speak to me that they’re more respectful and less jokey that they are around other people and it makes me feel like we’re not really friends or that there’s some kind of distance between us, and it makes me feel bad because it feels like I’ve stunted them and that I’m not fun to be around. It makes me feel like there’s something wrong with me.
I don’t know what to do now. People are reacting to the meme and making fun of it and I just have to take it. I don’t feel like I’m allowed to get mad at it because I said yes. If this is still bothering me by tomorrow then I want to tell them how I feel about this and how I think I should’ve said no, but I’m worried that I’m only doing that to make them feel guilty as a way of getting back at them for hurting me.
TLDR: I wanted to set a boundary but I didn’t because I convinced myself that I was being way too sensitive, and now I regret not setting the boundary and have built up resentment towards myself and the other person. Please help me decide what to do next.

I’ve been struggling with my mental illnesses lately and it’s been getting worse on me, my scleral fell out of my eye, In a disgusting horror show of a bedroom because of my situation, i am ashamed of my self, i finally got the willpower to clean it all fully and now i can’t find my lenses it’s like a needle in a haystack, my vision is like 20/700 without them and i can’t see anything or find them. god forbid i could afford a new pair and it hurts so much i can’t stop crying and breaking down.
it feels like an existential crisis. i don’t know what to do. i just want to see. it hurts so bad. i can’t find my lenses i have no money i have no insurances . it all hurts so much i don’t know what to do now. I’m ashamed of myself and my life, if my room wasn’t a pigsty i could’ve found them.
I was going to clean my room and get better. I was fixing them in my room, I know it’s my fault. It was the only time i’ve ever done it. It’s just been hurting so much lately how i feel inside and i wanted to finally better myself and clean. and i lose my fucking eyesight. i’m not going to go into detail about what i did but i had a huge mental breakdown on my self. i’m just laying in my pile of trash crying in agony. i can’t get new lenses

I have had this same sucky ass feeling for 2 years now and I don't really have anyone to talk to about this so I guess I am posting this here. My (f21) have been with my boyfriend (m21) for 5 years now. For the last two years I cannot stop thinking about having a baby. I have never craved or wanted anything so badly in my life and unfortunately it has gotten SO much worse lately since we are at the stage of life where our older siblings/cousins/friends are having kids so we (mostly me) are constantly seeing and hearing about them which just keeps reminding me. It hurts so badly (both physically and mentally) that I have noticed that I've started avoiding social media/engaging in conversation with family/friends and have been on "autopilot" the last month. Having a baby with him is the only thing I think about and it's the only thing I want in life. Growing up I never really had any drive to do well in school or pursue anything after high school since all my life I have wanted to be a mother. I have struggled off and on with depression in my teens (like most girls in America I think) and I think my obsession with being childless is starting to pull me back down into that "funk" again. I hate myself. I hate the way I feel. I hate everything about myself at the moment down to the way I breathe. We have talked about this and my feelings but each time I express how it makes me feel I get hit with the same two responses. It's either "We're too young at the moment and we should be married first" which is very valid and I understand where he is coming from with this. I would NEVER think of forcing anything onto him which makes me feel crazy typing that out but I have read some WILD stories. The second response I receive is "It'll be your time soon" which after that he just similes at me like that fucking emoji. Him saying that makes me feel like I've just received a swift punch to the gut and I am trying to regain my breath. I am not sure how to stop this feeling or how to stop thinking about babies. For context purposes my boyfriend and I meet in high school and have been together since and we are not intimate (sex obvi) due to his religion and more conservative views. We have had the marriage discussion multiple times, but recently he has given me the timeline of him proposing within the next year so we can potentially be married within two but he also stated that ideally he would like for us to be 26/27 when we start trying. I am not sure if my heart can handle waiting that long. How do I stop this feeling? I feel so hurt, ashamed, resentful, and embarrassed all at the same time. I prolly sound like bitchy typing all of this out since he is the most amazing man and partner. I could not see myself with anyone else but I am hurting so much and I am afraid since it is taking such a toll on me mentally I may ruin this. PLEASE HELP!?!?!?!?

Hello I’m in my first trimester, specifically 7 weeks, for a while my legs have hurt SO BAD, like since week 5 my leg muscles are so weak and I can’t stand for super long times, and I just found out I have BV so now my crotch burns really badly and moving makes it so much worse. I just asked my bf if he could cook me an egg sandwich for dinner and he started lashing out saying he ALWAYS makes me food (which he does) and that he hasn’t seen me make food in two months and that he feels trapped because if he doesn’t make me food I don’t eat. I explained that the only reason I ask him to make me food is because I’m in constant pain, specifically in my legs and now my hoo ha, and I’m extremely dizzy so when I go downstairs I feel like shit and can’t stand for too long, but he’s still mad at me. I know that I should be able to make myself food and stuff and I wish I was but I have genuinely had a really hard time during this pregnancy and I’m only on week 7. Idk what to do I don’t want to make him feel so bad, we had another argument before about how he feels hopeless and depressed right now and I think it’s because of me, I’ve felt horrible about myself and my pregnancy for so long and I still fucking do!! Idk what to do anymore, I don’t want him to feel unhappy because I’m pregnant, I just wanted a normal pregnancy.
Edit: the only time I don’t eat is if I’m in too much pain to be able to go downstairs and cook otherwise I’m fine making myself food

Hi guys I would really be interested to know what you would do in this situation?
So to give you a little background, my boyfriend and I have been together for 5 years. We really care about each other but the relationship has had some up and downs.
A few years back my boyfriend found some text messages in my phone where I was talking to strangers and exchanging sexual fantasies. After having been hurt and me having apologised and explained to him what the meaning of it all was he forgave me.
About a year later he actually told me that he had kissed someone else. Since I had done the text messages in the past I decided to forgive him immediately. He then fell into a deep depression which lead to a break up because he wasn’t able to feel anything anymore. We remained close after that and I helped him through that period of his life until he started feeling better. After that we were both on dating sites and I had asked of him for us to be honest with each other if we would actually meet anyone because that’s what friends do and it seemed healthier to be completely honest. He lied to me multiple times and after I found out, he accused me of not moving on, and he was right. After a while I was able to move on and found someone great. When he found out he told me that he wanted me back (1 year after the break up). So in fact he hadn’t moved on himself. I decided to get back together with him because I realised that I still lived him but under the condition that it had to be a fresh start.
After a while I noticed him being constantly on his phone, and I found out that he was doing exactly what I had done a few years back, texting with strangers. I noticed this twice and each time he told me that he had changed his thinking since I did it and that I shouldn’t take it personally. That it’s simply virtual relationships that would go nowhere. Since this happened twice in two months I am now really distrustful of him. I have told him about my feelings and he has assured me that nothing was going on and that he would stop. However I see him constantly on his phone and he was so defensive about it when we last talked. So now I feel like I’ve lost trust. He has lied to me so much and has been dishonest so often that I just feel like I can’t trust him anymore. Especially he has a habit of doing exactly what he has blamed me of doing…
I know that I haven’t been completely clean in the past. The relationship has become so complicated and there are so many layers of distrust that I don’t know if it’s still a healthy relationship.
I would be really interested to know what you guys think of the situation.
Thanks so much

I (17M) have always lived rather independently. I have friends I talk to but I once I leave school I usually just do stuff by myself. Mostly games and books and the like. If I played anything multiplayer it was with one person online or with my sister. Recently I had a huge frenzy of a relationship starting with her convincing me to date her and that i was worthy of love, to her showing me true love and affection, to her mother breaking us up and saying we can’t even be friends even though she is 18 and should be able to make her own choices and ending with her hating me and ruining my reputation and several friendships. I have the full story with all the ups downs and her controlling manipulative emotionally-abusive mother. If needed for context I can add it. After this super close relationship, i’m finding myself missing texting her constantly and i got super dependent so doing things alone feels lonely and difficult instead of natural. I keep longing for connection to anyone. Trying to talk with friends and game with friends way more. I used to never talk with or play with friends before and i never needed to. But now i’m struggling to do things alone and constantly longing for the connection and involvement she showed me was possible and invited me into. It also hurts knowing she’s graduating in a few days and i’ll never make amends. She’ll probably hate me forever. Even though she shares more interests and similarities with me than i can count, and i’ve tried to count. It hurts every time I see her but it also hurts knowing she’ll be gone soon. How can I go back to not caring or feeling like before?

In the dream we "fell" into a weird city. By we I mean me and a few family members including my grandparents.
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Anyway the city is exceptionally clean and the people there very religious with regular sermons.
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Now I instinctively hated it because everyone was smiling all the time and had this "be like everyone else" attitude. It was a bit creepy.
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Over time I got to know a few people there well enough to get invited to a wedding. Here's the odd part, for how religious they were the bride was practically naked! I tried to hint that the dress might not be appropriate for a church wedding but got laughed at since it was a TRADITIONAL wedding dress... it was a slip of see-through fabric with beading covering her privates...
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Then the brides entourage came in and yeah they confirmed it was a lovely traditional dress. Also why was I dressed like that? Clearly that was too much and the bride's aunt tried to take my bra off to match everyone. (one of us, one of us, one of us).
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When I refused she took of her own bra and offered to swap since it's smaller so will cover less. I managed to escape to the bathroom promising to practically strip in private.
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Well, not the bathroom, turned out to be a broom closet / storage area. but at least the crazy people were on the other side, thought I might be able to wait it out.
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Looking around the storage area I found something odd. There was "old" tech here. By that I mean from our day but the whole city was practically amish that I though we got teleported to the past. I found one device I didn't recognize so when the coast was clear I got out in the open and tried it out.
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It caused me to shoot through the sky. No literally up through the cloudish part only to discover this wasn't the sky, it was the waters surface. The whole city was under water but since we could breath and move normally we didn't notice! It explained why the sky never had a gradient, it was all one solid color depending on the time of day.
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On the "sky" two things were notable. First, two groups of golems were fighting and throwing rocks at each other. Rock golems (yellow-orange so maybe sand rock) & slab golems (grey rocks, very smooth). The debris fell to the city blew as gods judgement when it hit someone!
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Also here was another city. This one was old and basically a ruin over grown with vegetation. Looking through it I found a few people who were far more normal and reasonable.
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Going back a few time I was convinced something went wrong with our civilization, the city above was clearly one from our time now in ruins while the one underwater was more recently built. The ones living below had such a strong herd mentality that my own family was starting to get compliant and integrate. I tried to talk them into visiting the city in the sky, to see that this is all under water but they weren't interested, especially grandma that was feeling comfortable that grandpa was back in this world (died in 2012). Also wouldn't it be dangerous with the fighting golems? Solve that first then we'll see.
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Going up I asked the golems why they were fighting... it turned out that was because the sand golem leader had boobs and the slabs saw that as obscene... yeah really... I had them talk it over because the debris was hurting the people below.
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The sand golem shrugged and said they weren't people, just ants. When I asked about the people in the sky city they said "you don't know already?". As for who I was, well, they were going to talk to the slabs now so if I wanted an answer keep sailing towards the light in distance.
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This part I didn't mention, during my trips to the sky city I started to notice odd things. Yes it was a modern one now in ruins, yes it was full of plants so it was weird that the people that lived here acted and talked so civilized. But also another thing, witch symbols. Those were everywhere. Shrubs that were cut in the form of a witch's hat or pointy boots, statues of witches, magic symbols carved into the trees... etc. it was like a halloween set up in an ancient ruin. I kept trying to overlook it because the underwater city preached against witchcraft and heresy, clearly those were the nut jobs so anything they say should be disregarded... right? Also the people in the sky city were so normal & reasonable that no way they'd really be the bad guys. The undewater city had to be ignorant, that was totally it.
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The day I confronted the golems however was the day I found out the truth. While exploring the ruin I came across the communal kitchen. It was just a bunch of old fridges with forged food. One of them however contained a bag of blood. The girl showing me around said "Oh goody, there is one left" and snatched it from my hands sucking it up like capri sun. "Sorry but this is for our coven, Blood is how us witches get our knowledge and stay young after all. Can't share that without a price." Which is when it hit me that everyone here, while talking like an adult, looked so young and ageless. Also that they didn't know that me, and probably my family, would be considered food in a place like this, they thought I was a visiting witch hence the civility.
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The golem's words hit me hard. Yes, I knew. I just didn't want to acknowledge it because it meant I can't stay here. At the same time I didn't want to go back to the underwater city.
That only left sailing away into the unknown. My family refused to join, they were staying in the underwater city so... just me... Sailing into the light. Took awhile stuck between the two worlds, but in the end I made my own raft and set sail towards the light in the distance.

Dracula: World of War --- The Violet Reaper ---- Humans Don’t Make Good Familiars Book 1 ---- The Lonely World --- Discord ---- YouTube --- My Patreon --- My Author's Page --- ArcAngel98 Wiki ---- The Next Best Hero ---- HDMGF Book 2 ---- Jess and Blinx: The Wizard ---- The Questing Parties ---- Previous
It took a month for Zanwy to recover from losing her wing. The shaman said everything went well, but afterwards she developed a fever for three days, and couldn’t move from the pain for over a week. Even after the fever broke and the pain faded, she was still too weak to move, and could not eat for some time. I visited her every day, bringing her food, making sure she ate even a little, and peeling the chard scales off the wound to help it heal. The shaman never even returned once to check on Zanwy. Her parents and siblings stayed with her, but that may have only been because they lived there too. After she recovered her strength, we started making plans on what to do. She knew the swarm wouldn’t accept her anymore, and I never felt at peace within it, so our plan was to leave.
“Are you ready?” I asked Zanwy as we overlooked the cliff edge. Even though I could fly now, I was not strong enough to carry her, so she needed to climb down. Which, after a month of infrequent meals and not moving much, seemed risky. “We could wait a few more weeks. Until you recover.”
“No. I can’t stay here.” One claw after the other, her wing pressed tightly to her back so she didn’t catch an updraft and twist, her belly flat against the rock, and her head pointed to the ground, she climbed down carefully. Of course, I could have glided down, but I didn’t. It felt wrong now somehow. The rocks shadows had moved over an inch before we made it to the bottom, with the forest we loved so much as our first destination. We thought that maybe the first place we should go could be past the furthest point we’d gone together.
Walking through those familiar rolling grassy hills and past the jumper’s nests, I listened to these familiar sounds one last time. Taking it all in, I heard, of course, that penetrating roar of the swarm, but there was also the small wet splashes of the jumpers moving about, the small howl of the wind as it made waves in the tall grass, the crunch of that same grass under our claws as we walked, and Zanwy’s slight panting. She was out of breath, but was keeping quiet, hoping I wouldn’t notice.
Eventually, we reached the edge of the forest, and stopped to eat red-berries. We sat in the grass and ate the red-berries that had fallen out of the treetops. Once we’d had our fill, and juice dripped from our snouts, I asked Zanwy, “How do you feel?”
“Off balance. Walking is a lot harder than I remember it being.” Zanwy said, limping slightly.
“Can you climb?” I looked up to the branches we always run along.
“I… no. I don’t think so.”
“What if I helped you?”
“Maybe, but jumping along the branches would be hard.” A drop of berry juice ran down her mouth and landed on the grass as she licked her claws clean.
“Okay, we can just-”
“No, I wanna try.” Zanwy said.
Getting Zanwy up the tree truck was clumsy and hard. She rested her tail on my head as I climbed below her, pushing her up for support. It took a few minutes but she and I made it to the strong branches. The branch swayed with the wind, and Zanwy flared her one wing, before quickly realizing her mistake and pulling it, and herself, closer to the branch. Using my wings to balance myself, I walked over to her. “Should we go back down?”
“Not yet. Just let me…” She slowly stood back up, and kept her wing pressed to her body. The nub where her missing wing had once been pressed itself down too, mimicking the movements of the other like an invisible mirror. Pushing off, she jumped to another nearby branch, and landed safely on the other side. Once again, I heard heavy panting, but she couldn’t hide it as well right now. “See, I can do it!” Zanwy yelled excitedly as her tail swayed back and forth from the edge. I followed suit, and lept to the branch next to her. It took a while, but she found a rhythm, and we ran along the branches for nearly an hour, until the sun began to set.
“It’s almost night. Let’s find somewhere to sleep.” I suggested.
“Yeah, let’s head back to the ground.” Zanwy agreed.
“You don’t want to sleep in the trees?”
“No. Without my wing… I don’t wanna risk falling by accident. Do you mind sleeping with me on the ground?”
“Okay, let’s find somewhere safe.” We spent a few minutes looking around, and found a tree with a hollow spot near the base. It was cramped, but empty. By the time the moon rose we had already settled down. Zanwy rested closer to the back of the hollow, and I slept near the entrance.
“It’s cold.” She said, and yawned. Since we were under a tree, the walls of the hollow couldn’t be heated with fire directly. So slowly and carefully, Zanwy and I used our fire to heat the dirt under us instead. Small embers of grass charred, caught fire, and burned away, leaving the ground much warmer; enough for us to sleep comfortably.
That night, I dreamt of Zanwy. She was flying around, soaking up the sunlight with her wings. I was the too; flying right beside her. We danced in the sky together. Zipping and diving about. It was so quiet. It was just us; as a perfectly happy swarm of two. Later that night, I woke up feeling sluggish and dizzy. A moment later I realized how cold it had gotten, and that the heat from the ground had long since gone. Zanwy was still asleep, and I didn’t want to wake her up.
Controlling flames is easy… to a point. But once something is on fire, you don’t control how it burns. That was something my father taught me when I breathed my first flame. The grass had already burned, so I assumed it could burn again. Because of that, I thought it would be safe to use more this time. I assumed wrong. One breath was all it took, and the walls turned yellow with fire. I tried to put it out by beating it with my tail and wings, but that only spread it faster.
“Zanwy! Get up!” I shouted. Dragons may be harder to burn, but enough fire can char and blacken even our scales.
Zanwy startled awake, “what’s going on? What happened!?” The flames started creeping closer, so she scrabbled to her and we both ran out of the hollow. It didn’t take long for the rest of the tree to burn, and for the fire to spread to the nearby trees. We ran away as fast as we could, the smell of smoke in our noses, and the sounds of crackling flames left behind us. Once we’d gotten safely out of the forest, I told Zanwy what happened.
“I’m sorry.” I told her.
“I guess the forest isn’t as used to fire as our nests are.” She said. She was upset, but was trying to not let me hear it. “Let’s just find someone else to sleep for tonight.” It was dark, but we could both see well enough to spot a rocky outcrop.
“Rocks are harder to burn than trees.” Zanwy said, crawling into an opening between the rocks. We crawled inside, and made sure there was nothing that could burn this time.
“Looks safe to heat these up.” I suggested. Zanwy agreed, and we spent several minutes making the place warm. “Much better.”
We finally got to sleep again after that, and woke up to beams of light hitting our eyes from the opening in the rocks. I rolled my head away from the light, and covered my eyes with my wings. I was all set to go back to sleep, until Zanwy said, “Woah… look at this, Blinx.”
Sliding one of my wings down, I peaked an eye open. With the sun out, the cave we were in became a lot brighter. Enough to see that it was much deeper than we’d realized. Zanwy, who’d slept further in than I did, noticed it first.
“This hole is really deep.” She said. “And it gets darker inside too. Do you wanna go explore it?”
I stood up, and my stomach growled. “Sure, but let’s eat first.” We left the cave in search of food. Outside, we found three things. One, some tasty slitherers under a big rock. Two, some water under another rock. And three, a burned down forest. Well, not the whole forest, but a lot of it that we could see. In the distance, white smoke rose into the sky from a few different places. A lot of the grass around the rocky area had been burnt up too.
“I guess we slept through the worst of it.” Zanwy said.
“Are the fires out now, at least?”
“Yeah, the smoke it white, so nothing’s burning anymore.” The was a moment of quiet, and I thought about how lucky we were to escape that tree in time, and how careless I was.
“I’m… sorry. We almost got hurt because of me.”
“Forget it. Name one dragon who hasn’t accidentally burned something with their breath. Let’s just go look at that cave. That’s why we left, right? To explore?” She said.
“Yeah, let’s go.”
The cave itself was very deep, and the walls were made of stones of lots of different colors. As we climbed down, we had to squeeze between rocks, and scrabble with our claws to make holes as we went deeper and deeper down. Eventually, the light from outside didn’t shine, but we could still see fairly well, though not as far, and without any colors. The cave quickly went from colorful, to just shades of gray. As we went along, the sounds of our claws on the stone did something strange. The sounds started happening several times, and coming from all around us.
“Do you hear that Zanwy?” I asked.
“Hear what?”
“Listen,” I said, and tapped the stone with my claw. Suddenly, the same tap came from above, below, and beside us; like a tiny swarm was clattering all around the rocks.
“Let me try.” She said, and scratched a stone. Once again, the sounds repeated. “Oh wow!” We decided to go deeper, and find out what was causing the sounds to do that. Eventually though, we entered a big open area in the cave.
“What is this?” I asked, hoping down into the area, and looking around.
“I don’t know. Maybe it’s the village of another species!” Zanwy said. “Hello!” She cried out with her mind in a way that any species could hear and understand, but there was no answer. As we continued to look around, we found all kinds of things. There were strangely small hard clay nests all around, but they were filled with tiny rocks and ash and mud. There were also lines of white mud on the ground. I followed them, and they led to the center of the ‘village’.
“Find anything?” Zanwy asked, walking over.
“No, but I am getting cold.”
“Yeah, it was much warmer aboveground.”
“Do you wanna warm up?”
“No, you go ahead, I’m going to keep looking around.” She said. As she walked away, I used my fire to warm up the rocks below me. Suddenly, light started to shine from the mud lines, revealing that I was standing on a large, circle with a strange pattern on it. The light got brighter and brighter, and I tried to run, but found that I couldn’t move. “Blinx!”
“Zanwy!” Without warning, I felt dizzy, and I could move again. Then I heard the sounds of something behind me, but it wasn’t Zanwy. Growly, I tried to make myself look bigger, and threatening. Whatever it was, it stood on two legs, and was rubbing its eyes. In its hand was a broken tree branch, with a rock at one end. The cave village had been filled with light, but it came from all around.
“What the?” The creature mumbled, looking at me. “Are you a dragon?” I growled at the creature, while looking around for Zanwy, but she wasn’t there.
“Who are you? Where’s Zanwy?” I demanded. I let the flames build up in my mouth to show that I was dangerous.
The creature grabbed her head. “Telepathy. That’s new. My name is Jess. I’m a wizard. Who are you?”

I just had someone message me asking if they can post a meme they made in a group chat that has 70+ people in it. Not gonna go into detail but basically the meme was making fun of me for a decision that I made and I how its similar to decisions i’ve made a few times before.
Gonna be honest I didn’t want them to post it. I looked at it and thought about it for an entire 5 minutes and I wanted to say no, but then I worried that I was being too sensitive and that my sensitivity was ruining their fun. I started overthinking about what they might think pf me and worried that they might not feel comfortable making jokes around me anymore if I said no, so I let them post it. I was initially going to title this post “I’m way too sensitive to jokes and I feel like it makes people not want to be around me” because things like this have happened before and I always feel like I shouldn’t be upset about the thing that I’m upset about.
But at this point I don’t care about the joke itself - Now I’m just fucking kicking myself for not setting a boundary like I should’ve. All I had to do was say no. I didn’t even have to give an explanation. I could’ve just replied “No” and the person would’ve understood because they’re respectful with boundaries, but I didn’t and now it’s too late. Asking them to delete it looks too suspicious to everyone in the group chat.
This shit just makes me so furious. I hate that other people are allowed to set boundaries all they want against me and yet I can’t do it back to them, because if I do, then I end up regretting it and soiling the friendship and things are worse for me overall. This has happened to me multiple times in the past. Either I do nothing about what’s bothered me and build resentment, or I set a boundary and end up regretting it because it’s made the friendship awkward and made them less comfortable making jokes around me. Sometimes I think the former is GENUINELY better. I do remember a time in my life where someone was disrespecting me, yet when I think back on it I just think to myself “thank God i didn’t set a boundary about that” because I think that doing so would’ve soiled that friendship.
It makes me so sad because I feel like this is common in my life, in multiple groups. I can tell that when certain people speak to me that they’re more respectful and less jokey that they are around other people and it makes me feel like we’re not really friends or that there’s some kind of distance between us, and it makes me feel bad because it feels like I’ve stunted them and that I’m not fun to be around. It makes me feel like there’s something wrong with me.
I don’t know what to do now. People are reacting to the meme and making fun of it and I just have to take it. I don’t feel like I’m allowed to get mad at it because I said yes. If this is still bothering me by tomorrow then I want to tell them how I feel about this and how I think I should’ve said no, but I’m worried that I’m only doing that to make them feel guilty as a way of getting back at them for hurting me.
TLDR: I wanted to set a boundary but I didn’t because I convinced myself that I was being way too sensitive, and now I regret not setting the boundary and have built up resentment towards myself and the other person. Please help me decide what to do next.

20M 5’11 160lbs No medications or health conditions
Hello everyone! I’ve come on here to ask for my help for my situation. Doctors ents headache specialists neurologists and even just people who want to comment, I would really appreciate it if you shared your thoughts on what is going on and what course of action I should take. Basically the question is should I get surgery for the anatomical variants?( large right concha bullosa of middle turbinate and significant leftward deviated septum with a prominent bone spur on it). The concha bullosa is pretty big and hits both the septum and other side it’s not like a regular one. The deviated septum also hits the wall and blocks off the drainage pathways just like the concha bullosa.
Here is my symptoms: For about a year and half now I have had a constant fullness and pressure within my sinuses. It’s normally felt in my nose forehead and sometimes cheeks. It’s constant 24/7 from the moment I wake up to the moment I go to bed. It’s sometimes painful and usually gets worse as the day goes on. When I bend down it definitely gets worse. It’s always there in my head to some degree and it never feels like my head is fully clear. I do have a bit of trouble when breathing through my nose but it’s nothing crazy but I can’t get a full, clear, and refreshing breath. What’s weird is that when I cry or something and my mucus starts draining the pressure goes away. Even when an ent did an endoscopy and started moving around the camera in my nasal cavity, the mucus started draining and my symptoms went away for a split second. Sometimes I notice that my ear feels full and that the pressure sensation even goes to my throat. The pain is dull constant doesn’t throb and isn’t sharp. I don’t have any auras, visual or sound disturbances etc. It doesn’t come in waves either. If there is any other symptoms you would like to know if I am having please ask.
Testing: MRI, ct scan, endoscopy, and blood tests normal except for the anatomical variants I listed above. No signs of infection or inflammation. Nothing indicating headaches and nothing wrong with brain. No lesions, bone destruction, etc. My ent did notice a build up of mucus though when doing the endoscopy. Did flounase 2x a day, Claritin 1x and nasal rinse 2x a day but no significant improvement. I was referred to neurology by my ent because he said nothing I had indicated the symptoms I am saying. At neurology, we ran a course of amitriptyline and did a magnesium + riboflavin supplement but those did not help or maybe helped VERY minimally. Hot showers feel nice sometimes and advil sometimes helps ease the pain(only to a limited extent) when it hurts a lot. I also talked to an allergist and he said it’s probably not allergies, and I got a skin prick test that came back negative for everything a while ago.
My thoughts: I personally believe that the anatomical variants are responsible for my symptoms. I think what’s happening is that they are trapping the mucus and air flow and obstructing the sinus drainage pathways which can cause that pressure/ fullness sensation and why my head doesn’t feel fully clear. There is nuance here though and this is why the ent and other people are hesitant to recommend surgery. Concha bullosa is a normal anatomical variant found in a significant portion of the population (maybe even up to 54%) and is mostly asymptomatic. Deviated septum is also fairly common and is not normally responsible for pressure feelings within sinuses. Furthermore, up to 90% of cases where people think they have sinus problems, are actually migraines according to some studies. But my case is different because I am well educated in the symptoms of migraines and what I am experiencing does not add up to that. Also my anatomical variants are not like the normal population, especially my concha bullosa because it is really large and the mucus drainage thing like with endoscopy points to the anatomical variants.
Plan: I really only have two courses of action left that I can think of. I either go back to neurology and run through more cycles of medications to see if it’s migraines and if that doesn’t work go back to ent and discuss surgery. Or I don’t waste time and go straight back to my ent and talk about surgery and stuff. If there is other options or something else I should look into, please let me know.
I would really appreciate it if you guys shared your thoughts and what you think is going on and what I should do going forward I am getting pretty desperate and I know surgery is a big step. If there is any other information or questions you have, I would be more than happy to tell you!