I recently left my shitty IFT job (yippee!) where we would usually do 14-18 calls in a 20 hour shift. I was there for almost 3 years. We were in the trenches all the time, morale was trash, management was worse.
I really enjoyed the people I worked with and the camaraderie, but since starting medic school I was so sick of getting whipped 40 hours a week. I resigned and went to a staffing agency that staffs a BLS crew for an FD 5 minutes from my house.
Enough context, how to the folks at slow stations cope with the BOREDOM. We pull about 700 calls a year, 60% being from a nursing home 2 minutes from base. I’m still VERY new there, but I’m kinda at a loss for what to do with myself. I relieved a crew yesterday that said there hasn’t been a call in 2 DAYS.
I made the decision to work there knowing damn well it’s a slow station, and that I’d have the opportunity to study. I feel like I can’t concentrate there. I NEED to have physical exertion or else my brain won’t work (diagnosed adhd, refused meds). I’m afraid my BLS skills will deteriorate, not that they got used much at IFT. I feel like I have cabin fever every shift and I’m crawling up the walls. My partners watch TV and bring their laptops and sit all day. I do genuinely like the people I work with there, but I feel like I’m annoying them by talking or wanting to take the truck out.
I’m not planning on leaving yet, but it’s looking like it might not be a good fit for me. Does anyone have an experience like this? What helped y’all?

So it's a bit of a long story, grab a chair, maybe a snack just relax for a minute & let me tell you. When I was 17 now '23M' I met the most amazing woman, so madly in love with her. then 16 now '22F. Me and her were first loves, we did everything together & had developed a very strong friendship. We were best friends but we dated, It was amazing. All the growing up from 16 & 17 till when we broke up at 19 and 20. We did everything like getting our first place together, our first grownup jobs, our first new cars, at 18 she found out she was pregnant. I was ecstatic I mean besides the weight of being a teen parent & being totally unprepared haha, I mean I loved this person so much she was truly my everything. Fast forward to 2020 our baby boy was born & everything was great, both of us had government jobs new cars, a nice house and we were preparing to buy a house. Now the details on why we split are expansive so I'll just touch on them. She was going through postpartum depression & I knew so I was doing everything I possibly could to relieve her stress and anxiety. Now at the same time I had to handle an alcoholic set of parents, a dying uncle, a couple of friends who had passed. I had a lot going on mentally. Not to mention having memories that had been suppressed from my childhood come back to me. I was f*cked up and so was she. We started fighting a lot & ultimately decided to split up. I moved in with my parents & she did the same with hers. Except her mom lived in Arizona & a majority of her family did as well. Her father was the only person in Kansas City that was family. So she had trouble even having a place to stay. Eventually she had no choice but to go to Arizona for some time to get back on her feet. I said I could keep my son for some time while she took a few months to stabilize. 3 months in she asks if she could come get our son and bring him down for a few months. I couldn't do it, not only was him being in another state a massive risk to my custody but they are also Native American so the second she steps on a reservation I loose all rights. Well that's what I was being told by my parents & grandparents. I had no idea what to do do but I ended up not letting her take him. Stupid decision cause I had no reason not to trust her, the only person that's ever cared about me just cause they wanted not because I was family. Our relationship & friendship was solid up until then. It destroyed me & it destroyed her. Fast forward I'm 21 and she's 20, she's back in state and is contributing with our son. She bounced around dating men and living with them, until she eventually met someone and got engaged. They were together for a little over a year, well he ended up being physically abusive to her and my son. We are now 23 and 22, there relationship ended 3 months ago. I offered to let her stay with me until she gets back on her feet. Our friendship is just as strong as it was when we were teens. She's since forgiven me for keeping my son from her, l've also realized a lot about myself and what I had going on mentally. I never stopped loving her, she's always been the one for me & I knew that when we split. I needed that time tho, I got to spend 3 years with my father who passed last year. I got him sober & had gained fulfillment in seeing my father how I had never. I do not regret our split, but her being here has brought so much to light. She says she loves me still but isn't attracted to me, reason being how much I had hurt her in the past. I can see it, how she looks at me sometimes. She still loves me, she will make me lunch for work & ask me how l'm feeling when I seem off. She cares for me and we both enjoy each others company, she misses me when I'm at work. Now I'll say this situation is odd cause we both agreed getting back together because of situations might lead to decisions being made that aren't true to mr feelings. We do everything that would be done in a romantic relationship, besides intimacy. Now there art times that we get intimate, l'll console her if she's sad. (We sleep in the same bed) cuddling isn't something we do tho. Sometimes we may hold hands while we sleep. Or when we drink we might get a little touchy on each other. But nothing ever happens. I should mention we both are dating, I have gone on a few dates with some woman and same for her with men. We aren't together but we aren't not together. Truly confused & have no idea how to navigate this situation. My gut tells me wait it out and see if anything develops more, but my heart tells me to confess how I feel and what I want. I want her and only her, always have. Can someone help me navigate this with some wise advice, it would be greatly appreciated.
TL;DR;: I’m falling in love with the mother of my child who I’ve not been with for 3 years, she lives with me now due to circumstance & I have no idea how to handle this. What do I do?

My twins are 4 and a half months, 3 months adjusted. As you all definitely know, shit can get hectic real fast with multiples. My girl is very fussy in general and cries when she's tired. Sometimes we will be too busy to get to her right away or it'll just be me here (not often for now, thank god for for parental leave) and she will cry for like 10-15 minutes and then suck her thumb and fall asleep. This is completely unintentional. We always sooth them to sleep otherwise.
It just happens and while on one hand I feel relieved that she's able to do that, I am worried I am damaging her. I know it's bad for baby to make them self sooth/ sleep train too early and they are still so little. I feel bad every time it happens but there's really no way around it. And I have no intention of sleep training unless it's nessessary (they are very good nighttime sleepers). I can't be in two places at once and I feel awful!

I finally beat the Nameless Puppet on NG. It took me 3 days, at least 2 hours per session. My build was Advance, using the Acid Spear, Aegis fully upgraded, and the Perfect Guard Grindstone. I perfect blocked my way through the 1st phase. I relied on the Aegis on the 2nd phase, dodging into some attacks, and using the grindstone once its health fell below 50%. By the end of it, I had 3 Pulse cells left over, and used a total of 6 throwables to quickly end the fight.
And I hated every minute of it.
Every mechanical problems with the boss has been said many times over in other posts, but what I want to vent about is this: having anything resembling a decent ending be gated behind this travesty of a fight feels unnecessarily cruel.
See, I wouldn’t hate this fight so much if it was really, truly “optional”. If I had gotten a vanilla ending that at least acknowledged and respected all that hours I’ve poured into the game (and all the things I did to help the NPCs), I would’ve been happy to leave the Nameless Puppet to players who are more skilled (and have more time in a day) than me and put down the game with a good taste in my mouth. I would’ve been more excited to see what the devs will come up with next. Heck, I would even be encouraged to start a NG+ and try to beat this boss there, just for the challenge.
Instead, I am left with no sense of gratification at all from the few seconds of the ending cutscenes because the fight was so atrociously difficult. I didn’t even get to see what happens to the other characters (except for that one I guess).
Compare this to Bloodborne’s vanilla ending, where you don’t feel like you just threw 30 hours of your life out the window. It’s perfectly satisfying for players who don’t want to go through NG+ and who didn’t figure out the secret ending triggers. Even then, the other optional endings in that game are not necessarily “better” or “good” - they just get more and more Lovecraftian. The same is true of other FromSoft games, where you have an array of endings that are not necessarily “better” than the other, just different, and all of them are satisfying to get.
But Lies of P is set up such that the “true” ending is the only path where the stories are all wrapped up nicely in a way that makes sense. It is better than the other two in every single way, because no other parts of the game supports the other conclusions. It feels like the game was designed with that ending in mind. And because of that decision, the whole experience, for me, was almost thoroughly spoiled.
I hope in a future title they’ll listen to the other community feedbacks and not gate a satisfactory conclusion to a game behind a fight that expects you to be at least 90% on point, twice. I still respect the effort they put into the project, and I’m sure after going away from the game for a while I’ll remember the good bits. Right now I’m just sort of relieved that it was over.

it was 2019, vacations had started and i had a terrible friend group in my neighbourhood, they never included me in activities and they were all atleast 2 years older than me.
one evening, we were playing hide and seek and i somehow ended up kissing this older guy and then we used to kiss often, for a few weeks and then he completely abandoned me and got back with his girlfriend. that was tough for me, adding up to the friend group drama and everyone used to make a big deal out of dating older guys when it was clearly grooming. i had gotten groomed. not fun lol.
a few days later, my friend noticed a cut on my thigh that i got from a sharp corner of my bed and she asked if i was hurting myself, and thats when it hit me, how fun would it be to hurt myself! wrong kiddo, almost 6 years of you hurting yourself and scarring your body for life
at first, the cuts were superficial, but it made me feel relaxed and relieved, it got much worse after one of my classmates tried to cut herself in front of the entire class. thats when it actually got real. then the lockdown happened and i read more about self harm and talked to a few people who dealt with it, got the usual "stop doing it or i will stop talking to u" kinda convos.
self harm got worse, didnt dare to wear shorts for few months, lost a few friends because i was apparently too much to deal with, found this sub and very supportive comments.
and at last, getting professional help but it feels like the constant sadness never went away, it feels like i masked it with something else and never actually dealt with it and its coming back, but this time im much stronger and have some amazing people by my side <3

Hi guys - I am a few days post-op in which they found endo, and I'm so relieved to have a diagnosis after 10 plus years of pain. Wanted to say thank you to this group for helping me prepare for surgery in part, and also that I'm here to chat if anyone wants to. It's all been much smoother than I expected (and infinitely empowering to have taken the plunge with surgery - anyone else feel this way?), for which I'm grateful! Hugs.
edited to add: next step... learning/doing everything in my power to stop regrowth (-_-)

Delivering the commencement address to the graduating seniors at Morehouse College today, President Joe Biden addressed the nation. After thanking the mothers, fathers, grandmothers, grandfathers, and all the people who helped the graduates get to the chairs in front of the stage, Biden recalled Morehouse’s history. The school was founded in 1867 by civil rights leader Reverend William Jefferson White with the help of two other Baptist ministers, the Reverend Richard C. Coulter and the Reverend Edmund Turney, to educate formerly enslaved men. They believed “education would be the great equalizer from slavery to freedom,” Biden said, and they created an institution that would make the term “Morehouse man” continue to stand as a symbol of excellence 157 years later. Then Biden turned to a speech that centered on faith. Churches talk a lot about Jesus being buried on Friday and rising from the dead on Sunday, he said, “but we don’t talk enough about Saturday, when… his disciples felt all hope was lost. In our lives and the lives of the nation, we have those Saturdays—to bear witness the day before glory, seeing people’s pain and not looking away. But what work is done on Saturday to move pain to purpose? How can faith get a man, get a nation through what was to come?” It’s a truism that anything that happens before we are born is equidistant from our personal experience, mixing the recent past and the ancient past together in a similar vaguely imagined “before” time. Most of today’s college graduates were not born until about 2002 and likely did not pay a great deal of attention to politics until about five years ago. Biden took the opportunity to explain to them what it meant to live through the 1960s. He noted that he was the first in his family to graduate from college, paid for with loans. He fell in love, got a law degree, got married and took a job at a “fancy law firm.” But his world changed when an assassin murdered the Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King—a Morehouse man—and the segregated city of Wilmington, Delaware, erupted with fires, looting, fights, and occasional gunfire. For nine months, the National Guard patrolled the city in combat gear, “the longest stretch in any American city since the Civil War,” Biden recalled. “Dr. King’s legacy had a profound impact on me and my generation, whether you’re Black or white,” Biden explained. He left the law firm to become first a public defender and then a county councilman, “working to change our state’s politics to embrace the cause of civil rights.” The Democratic Party had historically championed white supremacy, but that alignment was in the process of changing as Democrats had swung behind civil rights and the 1965 Voting Rights Act. Biden and his cohort hoped to turn the Delaware Democratic Party toward the new focus on civil rights, he said. In 1972, Biden ran for the Senate and won…barely, in a state Republican president Richard Nixon won with 60% of the vote. Biden recalled how, newly elected and hiring staff in Washington, D.C., he got the call telling him that his wife and daughter had been killed in a car accident and that his two sons were gravely injured. The pain of that day hit again 43 years later, he said, when his son Beau died of cancer after living for a year next to a burn pit in Iraq. And he talked of meeting First Lady Jill Biden, “who healed the family in all the broken places. Our family became my redemption,” he said. His focus on family and community offered a strong contrast to the Republican emphasis on individualism. “On this walk of life...you come to understand that we don’t know where or what fate will bring you or when,” Biden said. “But we also know we don’t walk alone. When you’ve been a beneficiary of the compassion of your family, your friends, even strangers, you know how much the compassion matters,” he said. “I’ve learned there is no easy optimism, but by faith—by faith, we can find redemption.” For the graduates, Biden noted, four years ago “felt like one of those Saturdays. The pandemic robbed you of so much. Some of you lost loved ones—mothers, fathers, brothers, sisters, who…aren’t able to be here to celebrate with you today…. You missed your high school graduation. You started college just as George Floyd was murdered and there was a reckoning on race. “It’s natural to wonder if democracy you hear about actually works for you. “What is democracy if Black men are being killed in the street? “What is democracy if a trail of broken promises still leave[s]…Black communities behind? “What is democracy if you have to be 10 times better than anyone else to get a fair shot? “And most of all, what does it mean, as we’ve heard before, to be a Black man who loves his country even if it doesn’t love him back in equal measure?” The crowd applauded. Biden explained that across the Oval Office from his seat behind the Resolute Desk are busts of Dr. King and Senator Robert Kennedy, challenging Biden: “Are we living up to what we say we are as a nation, to end racism and poverty, to deliver jobs and justice, to restore our leadership in the world?” He wears a rosary on his wrist made of Beau’s rosary as a reminder that faith asks us “to hold on to hope, to move heaven and earth to make better days.” “[T]hat’s my commitment to you,” he said. “[T]o show you democracy, democracy, democracy is still the way.” Biden pledged to “call out the poison of white supremacy” and noted that he “stood up…with George Floyd’s family to help create a country where you don’t need to have that talk with your son or grandson as they get pulled over.” The administration is investing in Black communities and reconnecting neighborhoods cut apart by highways decades ago. It has reduced Black child poverty to the lowest rate in history. It is removing lead pipes across the nation to provide clean drinking water to everyone, and investing in high-speed internet to bring all households into the modern era. The administration is creating opportunities, Biden said, bringing “good-paying jobs…; capital to start small businesses and loans to buy homes; health insurance, [prescription] drugs, housing that’s more affordable and accessible.” Biden reminded the audience that he had joined workers on a picket line. To applause, he noted that when the Supreme Court blocked his attempt to relieve student debt, he found two other ways to do it. He noted the administration’s historic investment in historically black colleges and universities. “We’re opening doors so you can walk into a life of generational wealth, to be providers and leaders for your families and communities. Today, record numbers of Black Americans have jobs, health insurance, and more [wealth] than ever.” Then Biden directly addressed the student protests over the Israeli government’s strikes on Gaza. At Morehouse today, one graduate stood with his back to Biden and his fist raised during the president’s speech, and the class valedictorian, DeAngelo Jeremiah Fletcher, who spoke before the president, wore a picture of a Palestinian flag on his mortarboard and called for an immediate and permanent ceasefire in Gaza, at which Biden applauded. “In a democracy, we debate and dissent about America’s role in the world,” Biden said. “I want to say this very clearly. I support peaceful, nonviolent protest. Your voices should be heard, and I promise you I hear them.” “What’s happening in Gaza…is heartbreaking,” he said, with “[i]nnocent Palestinians caught in the middle” of a fight between Hamas and Israel. He reminded them that he has called “for an immediate ceasefire…to stop the fighting [and] bring the hostages home.” His administration has been working for a deal, as well as to get more aid into Gaza and to rebuild it. Crucially, he added, there is more at stake than “just one ceasefire.” He wants “to build a lasting, durable peace. Because the question is…: What after? What after Hamas? What happens then? What happens in Gaza? What rights do the Palestinian people have?” To applause, he said, “I’m working to make sure we finally get a two-state solution—the only solution—for two people to live in peace, security, and dignity.” “This is one of the hardest, most complicated problems in the world,” he said. “I know it angered and frustrates many of you, including my family. But most of all, I know it breaks your heart. It breaks mine as well. Leadership is about fighting through the most intractable problems. It’s about challenging anger, frustration, and heartbreak to find a solution. It’s about doing what you believe is right, even when it’s hard and lonely. You’re all future leaders, every one of you graduating today…. You’ll face complicated, tough moments. In these moments, you’ll listen to others, but you’ll have to decide, guided by knowledge, conviction, principle, and your own moral compass.” Turning back to the United States, Biden urged the graduates to examine “what happens to you and your family when old ghosts in new garments seize power, extremists come for the freedoms you thought belonged to you and everyone.” He noted attacks on equality in America, and that extremist forces were peddling “a fiction, a caricature [of] what being a man is about—tough talk, abusing power, bigotry. Their idea of being a man is toxic.” “But that’s not you,” he continued. “It’s not us. You all know and demonstrate what it really means to be a man. Being a man is about the strength of respect and dignity. It’s about showing up because it’s too late if you have to ask. It’s about giving hate no safe harbor and leaving no one behind and defending freedoms. It’s about standing up to the abuse of power, whether physical, economic, or psychological.” To applause, he added: “It’s about knowing faith without works is dead.” “The strength and wisdom of faith endures,” Biden said. “And I hope—my hope for you is—my challenge to you is that you still keep the faith so long as you can.” “Together, we’re capable of building a democracy worthy of our dreams…a bigger, brighter future that proves the American Dream is big enough for everyone to succeed.” “Class of 2024, four years ago, it felt probably like Saturday,” Biden concluded. “Four years later, you made it to Sunday, to commencement, to the beginning. And with faith and determination, you can push the sun above the horizon once more….” “God bless you all,” he said. “We’re expecting a lot from you.” — Notes: https://www.whitehouse.gov/briefing-room/speeches-remarks/2024/05/19/remarks-by-president-biden-at-the-morehouse-college-class-of-2024-commencement-address-atlanta-ga/https://www.inquirer.com/news/a/wilmington-del-riots-occupation-martin-luther-king-jr-national-guard-20181207.htmlhttps://www.reuters.com/world/us/morehouse-graduation-thanks-god-woke-class-2024-2024-05-19/

https://heathercoxrichardson.substack.com/p/may-19-2024

Hi 😁 Just got home from running around all morning. I got up, took R to the bus stop, came home and immediately was on the phone with a client for an hour 🤦🏼‍♀️. Rushed to take a shower and get to my massage appointment with my favorite chic. She did EXTRA AWESOME today. Ran to the office. Had to go fix someone else's insurance and now I'm finally home with a few hours to myself before I have to get up and go pick R up. I had a taco for lunch. I'm soooooo beyond ready for a nap. I'm still tired from yesterday. I got a little pink, but it's tan now.
R had his 3rd swim lesson yesterday. He is showing huge improvement, but I think yesterday kicked his ass. She worked him hard. He has now been introduced to 3 out of 4 strokes. Butterfly is last. So far he seems to be the best and backstroke and isn't too bad at breast stroke for only doing it one time. We are skipping next week, because the lady didn't want to do a lesson on Memorial Day so he will go back again the week after and then I believe he's done with it. I'm not sure if he's going to stick with it, that's what this trial is for. I think he could be really good at this though. He's like me. Naturally well rounded at anything he tries. Not necessarily the absolute best, but reeeaaalllly good. I think he could be a track superstar if his head was in it. I couldn't believe the shit he was doing.
I am on a mission for a big citrine cluster rock to add to my table. I have been finding some pretty cool pieces but I don't wanna pay the ridiculous prices. If I keep it up I'm gonna need a bigger table.
Omg the tax lady just called me back. I got THE best news ever. I am getting a refund instead of having to pay. AND she said she going to go back and redo my last TWO years of taxes and I will get a refund AND get back all the money I paid in. So at the end of it all I will probably get back over a 10k check. I am soooooo relieved about this. I should have found her years ago. She said there were so many things he fucked up and wasn't making sense AND she said I can claim all those medical bills and even the sales tax on my car! Like holy shit. Why the hell didn't anyone else tell me that? The good news is that I will get this refund soon. The amendments might take 6 months but you know what? That is perfectly fine by me. I can track it and then wake up one day with a huge chunk in my account. I knew something was sketchy about paying in all that money when I was filing single, head of household with a dependent and all of those write-offs. I just didn't know where else to go and who else to trust. Thank God the dude in my office recommended me to her. I am keeping her forever! I just have to dig up a few papers but that's fine too. I am almost positive as to where I have everything. Soooooooooooo stoked 😁😁😁
On that note, I need to nap like I said I was going to. I miss you something fierce and I love you beyond measure or explanation. I will talk to you soon, my love. 😘😘 Always and forever, I love you more.
PS: Send me a picture pretty please 🥺 🙏🏼

I can't really give the numbers my pool is at because I'm still trying to open it (lots of organic material in the pool). I just shocked for the third time so I'm y probably get accurate level readings tomorrow. This is the first time I've had buildup on my pool. Comes if with my fingers but not the brush. It feels like sandpaper on the walls. Once I get levels to normal will the buildup come off easier?

A while back I posted about "sensitive skin" being a side effect. I was at .5mg/per week for a while and had that side effect but after some months it went away. About 5 weeks ago, I went up to 1/mg per week and the "sensitive skin" has returned.
I have seen that some side effects (like nausea) are managed with other medications. I am wondering if anyone here knows of something that will reduce the sensitive skin feeling. I have tried things like Ibuprofen and Tylenol. I think Tylenol helps to some degree.

For some reason, I lied to myself I was gonna be fine today. It’s so crazy how even if you actively try to forget or anticipate the day less, your body still remembers. After an excruciatingly long day, the day I’ve been dreading all month is almost at an end.
I’ve cried all day. Been dissociated. Tired. In pain. It’s so crazy to think how I’m just in as much pain as I was two years ago, if not more.
Mom, as miss you so fucking much it actually hurts. Thank you for giving me signs throughout the day that you’re still with me though. I’m not sure if I’m gonna be able to sleep tonight if I’m honest because it feels like I just lost you right now. I’m not sure if I’m making you proud but I’m sure as hell trying. I’m sorry if I’m not perfect. I’m sorry if I’ve disappointed you in any way. This is new for me. For some reason I genuinely thought you were immortal; that you’d never leave. In some ways though, I’m relieved you’re at peace. The world was too much for you and you deserved a rest. I’m trying my best to survive but damn it’s hard.
I’m not sure of anything anymore but what I know is that I love you. I’ll love you in every life and I pray I know you in every single life I have. Thank you for being my best friend and for loving me so selflessly. You deserved the world and I hope I was able to give you even a fraction of it. I hope that you’re able to live through me. I hope that I’m able to love like you. Please never leave me. I love you

I’m curious as to the experience of anyone else who is on Zepbound and doesn’t have a gallbladder.
I had my gallbladder removed when I was 17 due to (what I now know what rapidly unhealthy) weight loss triggering gallstones. I’ve had to be careful in the 20-ish years since to make sure that I eat about the same amount of fat in a day—either too much more or less in any direction and things get unpleasant quickly.
I was tracking food intake with Zep, mostly to make sure I was getting enough protein and maintaining a healthy level of fat (because I’d read Zep can make people even more sensitive to fat). I needed to take a stool softener and up my fiber intake but was otherwise fine.
This last week, I ran out of Zepbound and about 9 days after my last dose, I had a terrible stomach ache—reminded me of back when I first got my gallbladder out, before I learned how to monitor my fat intake. I hadn’t eaten anything out of the ordinary, and didn’t overeat, but I was bloated and in a lot of pain.
I’m only on 5mg and don’t plan on going up anytime soon, and am just curious about anyone else who doesn’t have a gallbladder and has done on (or off) this med and what your experience was.

I took the fourth and final dose of 2.5mg last Thursday. I only felt mild appetite suppression and the sweets cravings were strong. It was definitely less effective than the three previous doses. I know it's the loading strength and all that, but the difference was notable. Did I build up a tolerance or something? Just wondering out loud. Thankfully, my 5mg package is en route and will be here in time for this Thursday's injection.

I know you guys hate people flexing, but I am writing this hoping to be helpful. I didn't just get lucky, I planned for everything I did over a month in advance, and I succeeded in picking up 3 boxes of 7.5mg. If you are as impatient and crazy as me, and you are fine maxing out your credit card like me, keep reading.
In the April 9th weekly availability post, someone said he travelled to puerto rico and found zepbound in stock everywhere, likely because it was too expensive for local residents. I commented and said I'd rather spent a few hundreds on a PR flight than calling 100 pharmacies in vain. Others found my comment hilarious. I was serious.
I called many PR pharmacies and they didn't answer calls, for the only one that did answer the call, nobody spoke English. I decided I need to show up in person. I told my doctor about my plan, she said it was creative but she couldn't send Rx out of NJ. I went back and confirmed PR walgreen can transfer from NJ walgreens. I agreed with my doctor that I will travel on weekdays, so that I can contact her during the travel.
I then bought a huge insulin travel case with ice packs, took days off from work, got my flight, and headed over on a Monday. I landed in San Juan and the first thing I did was to travel to the nearest Walgreen. They didn't have 7.5, but the staff wrote down five locations, four with 1-month supply and one with 3-month supply. I decided to take the 3-month supply since I already went this far. My insurance doesn't cover Zepbound, and the savings card only works on one-month, so yeah I decided to pay 3000+ out of pocket.
A million things went wrong in between: my cellular data somehow didn't work, my phone died, the NJ walgreen didn't receive the prescription, then they tried to give me one-month instead of three-month, the doctor was out of office, the pharmacy insisted on contacting the insurance even after I said I'll pay OOO, the bank suspected fraud and locked my card when I tried to spend thousands in PR, etc etc. but in the end, after many hours and millions of phone calls, I got my 3-month supply. They are now happily sitting in the fridge in my hotel.
For context, I was on 5mg for 5 months and my weight had been plateauing for a month. Thanks to Medfinder I never had to stop shots, but I also wasn't able to move up. I was also prepared for the worst: if I couldn't get it in PR, I'll seriously consider compounds.
Again, I definitely went a bit far, I spent a lot of money and a lot of time. Now that the shortage seems to relieve a little bit, I wonder if I'll eventually regret paying the full price OOO, when I could have gotten 1-month supply and used the savings card. Anyway, as an impatient person I just hate the uncertainty of a shortage. Fortunately now I am secured for three months, and I still have two days to enjoy my little vacation in Puerto Rico. If you are as crazy as me, try travel to PR. There are at least four walgreens that still have 7.5 mg supplies!

Sometimes my cat will do nothing but lay in my bed, for several hours and sometimes the whole day. She just wants to sit there. If I lay down with her, she starts purring and cuddling me, but if I get up she just sits there, staring at me while what I assume is waiting for me to get back down with her. Problem is, when I leave she just continues laying there. If I put her down, she just gets back up. If I close my door she meows in a sad manner and scratches my door. She seemingly would rather lay in my bed than go to the bathroom or eat food. She doesn't always do this but I'm curious as to why she would. Don't know if I would really consider it a problem because this isn't like the only thing she does or anything, but any time I sleep with her, she'll lay there for a LONG time before leaving, refusing to do anything but lay there. She's a fat cat too, and normally she goes to eat food any time she gets the opportunity. I don't know why she does this sometimes, but I think she might just be waiting for me to lie back down with her because she has a history of doing similar things. Probably not a big deal or even a problem but kinda curious if anyone has had the same experience and if I should start forcing her into places where she can relieve bodily functions

i’ve known that i was autistic for a long time. i feel like i should feel relieved. i don’t know why it’s affecting me so much. i thought it would make me feel better, but it didn’t. i also have so many co-diagnosis’s i feel like it’s insane :( one of my main reasonings for seeking an autism diagnosis in the first place is because i thought there was no way i had all of these different diagnosis’s, (bipolar 2, borderline, ptsd, generalized anxiety disorder, social anxiety disorder) and i really thought everything could be summed up into just autism, gad and maybe ptsd. but it’s not. i got a full neuropsychological test and all of the previous diagnosis’s remained and autism and adhd just got added to it. i am so overwhelmed. i know this is just a place for autism but, i don’t know. i feel like things aren’t ever going to get better for me. i don’t know how to cope with this :( (don’t worry i am okay and i can contract for safety.) i know nothing has changed, and nothing will change, but i’m just nervous about my life going forward. for some reason i feel like things are going to be different. i feel like people are going to look at me differently or not take me seriously, like my family and partner, they told me they don’t but i’m just having a hard time believing it. does this make sense at all? how did you feel after your diagnosis? did anything change after your diagnosis? (for the better or the worse) do you have any tips for how to cope or just words of comfort to share with me? i only have my aunt and my partner and they don’t have experience with any of this, and while i appreciate their efforts i feel like they just don’t get it. thank you for reading. ❤️

Hi -
I woke up with a thrombosed external hemorrhoid 2 days ago. Couldn’t sleep at night from the pain and discomfort. I went to the doctor today and he gave me 2 options to either drain it or cut it out, but said draining would just temporarily relieve it. I opted to have it removed and had sutures put in. He told me cutting it out would leave me sore but the lidocaine is wearing off and it hurts like hell - way worse than having the hemorrhoid.
He didn’t give me any pain meds - just told me to take advil and I can soak it.
anyone with experience of this? How long is this excruciating pain going to last?

I've had TMJ issues as long as I can remember. The last few years it's gotten so much worse especially this last year. I tried dental guards but I have a small mouth and have to order the kids version next check to see if it fits, the regular ones I got won't stay in.
I use cold packs and massage the area when flare ups happen but it's not always super effective. It causes terrible headaches and I'm not supposed to take most OTC pain relievers because of my ulcerative colitis.
I'm looking for suggestions for any type of massager, cream/lotion/etc, any thing to help with the pain. I'm more than open to suggestions to exercises and any tips anyone has.
I can't afford to go see a dentist again until fall and I'm not sure if my health insurance will cover PT for it because I just got Medicare and there's a lot that it seems to not want to cover.
Thank you to anyone who will respond, I'm tired of the endless pain. :(

[ Notice: Not my article. Link: https://4womaninthewilderness.blogspot.com/2012/08/here-is-answer-to-comment-that-was-left.html ]
~COMMENT:~ Hello Pearl! I can only thank Jah that i found you! After seventeen years as a JW, i found myself so disturbed and distraught (i.e., sighing and groaning) over what was going on that i just couldn't bring myself to attend the meetings anymore. Prior to my departure, i discerned that much of the Society's liturature was laced with poison so i completely stopped reading any of it and began studying the scriptures only. What a difference that made! While i secretly never agreed with some of the Governing Body's official doctrines, policies and procedures (i viewed them as unscriptural, even idolatrous in some cases), when i realized that they couldn't possibly be the "faithful and discreet slave" (that is a future designation and only Jah/Jesus appoint these individuals, not themselves), I got the last bit of courage needed to finally leave and begin searching. Eventually i found your blog and now check it nearly everyday for any new information. A very close friend of mine who has also left after nearly twenty years as a JW (she just couldn't deal with it emotionally/mentally anymore) also reads your blogs and is as electrified as I am to be finally experiencing the true meaning of the "light getting brighter"!
So here's my question: How do we sound the warning that you mentioned? Since it's likely that no one on the inside will listen, what good will it do? Besides, you said yourself that a Christian is not obligated to sow seed among thorns. So while I have the desire to help others get out of symbolic Jerusalem, I do not know how to go about it nor do i see any point in it. Simply mentioning that i was no longer attending meetings (besides making a brief comment about the hypocrisy in the congregation) was enough for one person --someone i considered a good friend previously--to immediately cease all association with me. Thus, even hinting at the idea that the Organization is not all that its cracked up to be will send 99.9% of 'em running with their thumbs in their ears! Please advise. Thank You!
~REPLY:~ I also, am greatly relieved to hear that you have found the truth, which I myself am so grateful to YHVH's spirit for. There are those who read it and recognize none of the truth of the cited scriptures...and then there are expressions like yours, which reveal eyes and ears that are open, and a consciousness of their spiritual poverty (Matt.5:3). This need is keen during this spiritual famine and drought (Amos 8:11; Rev.6:6; 18:8; 12:14)...yet the spiritual pestilence that strikes others with blindness and an inability to hear, keeps them sick and unaware of their dire need (Matt.13:15; Rev.3:17; 6:8). The senseless are the ~great~ ~majority~ (Matt.7:13,14; Luke 13:23,24; Matt.24:22; Ps.94:17,5,8,12,13,14,16,18,20,22,23,20, 21; Rev.20:9,7,8,9; 13:15; 11:7; 6:9,11). So to hear that my labors, (and that of other faithful) are reaching some, is of great refreshment, and relief to my grief (Matt.10:42).
The Bible reads; "But God also rescued Lot out of Sodom because he was a righteous man who was sick of the shameful immorality of the wicked people around him. Yes, Lot was a righteous man who was tormented in his soul by the wickedness he saw and heard day after day. So you see, the Lord knows how to rescue godly people from their trials, even while keeping the wicked under punishment until the day of final judgment." 2Pet. 2:7-9 (Eze.9:4)
"The eyes of the Lord search the whole earth in order to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him." 2Chron. 16:9 A
We see from these three scriptures that Yhwh will not abandon those whose heart is exclusively devoted to Him. He delivers them by His strength (2Chron. 16:9). His Spirit can bring them to the truth (John 6:44; 14:6) as He does for each faithful anointed one, as well as all those who may accept the "fine fruit" the faithful witnesses offer (Matt.10:40,41,42; Matt.7:20; Rev.11:3,4).
Regarding your question, Yhwh has begun to make me aware of what I must do, as well as how to do it. You are right that God's "Land" must be warned (Jer.25:30,29; Rev.2:20; 13:14). It is true that Satan has erected a wall around God's people. It would seem impossible to penetrate that wall with the judgment message. Remember the wall of Jericho? That prophecy will be fulfilled in its grandest meaning, in our very day (Josh.6:8,13; Rev.8:6). I am going to ask everyone whose heart inclines him to obey Eze.33:7,8 to be a part of the upcoming universal witness. For, it is the final one to be given. I am talking to another anointed one about how Holy Spirit is guiding this final warning. I will most certainly post all the details, as we become certain of how to do this in harmony with Yhvh's approval. The wall of Jericho fell, partly due to the blowing of the 7 horns of the priests (Joshua 6:8). This final wall of false teachings, which holds captive God's Called Ones, falls by the same means, as symbolized in Revelation (Rev.8:6). "Whether they hear, or whether they refrain" the warning must be given (Eze.2:5). This warning will be the main tool used to harvest the remaining wheat of anointed, upon which the arrival of the Kingdom awaits (Rev.14:14,15,16; 6:11). It is a very important activity, and I hope everyone possible will offer themselves to support it. The lives of those whom we regard as our "brothers and sisters", as well as the anointed who are still asleep and in chains, hangs in the balance. In fact it would be good to consider all of Ezekiel chapter 2, because it brings up the very "thorns" you mention.
Eze.2:1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10: And he said to me, “Son of man, stand on your feet, and I will speak with you.” And as he spoke to me, the Spirit entered into me and set me on my feet, and I heard him speaking to me. And he said to me, “Son of man, I send you to the people of Israel, to nations of rebels, who have rebelled against me. They and their fathers have transgressed against me to this very day. The descendants also are impudent and stubborn: I send you to them, and you shall say to them, ‘Thus says the Lord God.’ And whether they hear or refuse to hear (for they are a rebellious house) they will know that a prophet has been among them. And you, son of man, be not afraid of them, nor be afraid of their words, ~though briers and thorns are with you and you sit on scorpions.~ (Rev.9:3; Eze.2:6) Be not afraid of their words, nor be dismayed at their looks, for they are a rebellious house. And ~you shall speak my words to them, whether they hear or refuse to hear~, for they are a rebellious house. But you, son of man, hear what I say to you. Be not rebellious like that rebellious house; open your mouth and eat what I give you.” And when I looked, behold, a hand was stretched out to me, and behold, a scroll of a book was in it. And he spread it before me. And it had writing on the front and on the back, and there were written on it words of lamentation and mourning and woe." (Rev.8:13; 20:12)
So while we are not obligated to cast pearls before swine; we need to discern who those swine, dogs, "~thorns~" and "scorpions" are. https://4womaninthewilderness.blogspot.com/2013/06/dogs.html YHVH tells us in Rev.9:3,5,7.These are the ones bearing what seems like "crowns" of authority, an army that goes forth as multitudinous as a locust swarm. Their target? The "unsealed men", anointed previous to their being sealed. Why unsealed? Because they are obviously still under the domination of these "Locust/Scorpions" instead of Yhvh. Only by being set loose (Rev.9:14) from this smoke-like river of Satan's sons and their lies (Rev.12:15; 9:11; John 8:44; 2Thess. 2:3,9; Rev.12:3,9; 13:1,14,6); can these chosen ones become sealed as loyal to Yhvh (Rev.20:4). Yet we see from Eze.2 that a witness still has to be given to the "rebellious house". ~This is the light,~ although these empowered Locust/Scorpions exist, we may not conclude that all "Jehovah's Witnesses" are these "thorns". Only the elders are depicted as having counterfeit crowns of authority. These ones are the "thorns" and "scorpions". Yhvh tells us that they are beyond conversion to truth, by the "breastplates of iron" which they wear (Rev.9:9). While the entire "house"/"land"/"fold" of God's people are blinded by these insect vessels of darkness (Rev.9:2,3; Jer.25:29,30; Rev.12:16) and it causes them to leave loyalty to Yhvh; not all are those insects of authority/elders. We can not condone the idolatry of "Jehovah's Witnesses", nor continue to remain in company with them (Psalm 26:4; 1Cor. 5:11; Rev.18:4). But Ezekiel chapter 2 is clear, we must witness to them this final warning.
Jesus clearly showed me that the great majority will not heed the warning, not because we did not reach them with it, but due to their own hardened hearts, they stand as judged. Yhvh abandons them to their own desire. (Luke 17:28-37 LINK; 2Thess. 2:11; Ps.94:23) I hope you can see why this warning needs to be given. It saves us individually from blood-guilt. It establishes Yhvh's justice in condemning the wicked (who were first given warning). It saves those who can hear. It seals the rest of those who prove faithful, as well as the unfaithful "ten kings" who side with the Beast. All extremely important events of prophecy! I hope all who possibly can, will help. As I said, I will post details as they are established.
Your comments about the reaction of those marked by the Beast, help to illuminate the true identity of the Organization within prophecy. There is no other authority and power on earth, that has this control over people's minds and actions, as does this Wild Beast of Rev.13:8,15,16. We are seeing the fulfillment of that prophesied displaced loyalty and worship of the Wild Beast, right before our own eyes! God's Kingdom draws near!
https://4womaninthewilderness.blogspot.com/2013/05/warning-letter.html
Pearl's letter and Obadiah's letter

One of the most obvious problems with my life is the amount of time I've spent unproductively in front of a computer. It started with solitary offline programming projects, then offline gaming, then the internet, and especially Reddit.
There are various things I've done in the past that I value in retrospect. I only value a very small part of the time I've spent in front of a computer. Mostly it seems like a waste of time.
It is also obvious that spending time online negatively affects my mental state. I think of it as taking a break and having some rest, but it is almost never really rest. Also, after spending time online, my motivation for offline activities seems to decrease, and avoidance of various offline activities increases.
Recently I tried to decrease online activity. Part of this was via staying logged out of Reddit, and keeping the password stored in an inconvenient place. Active participation, via posting, commenting, or even voting, seemed more harmful and addictive than mere observation. Seems like my motivation gets redirected away from offline activity into those activities, plus the associated sense of reward makes going online more addictive.
Because of this, I was being more productive. I wasn't feeling great, but it was tolerable and I kept going. I accomplished some things I had been procrastinating.
If I needed a rest, going to lay down and maybe have a nap was better than going online. After that I would usually have motivation to do other things.
But then, after accomplishing one thing I was procrastinating that my mother seemed to want accomplished, I had a bad experience with her. That led to unacceptable emotional pain and then anger. It was very difficult to recover from this.
Online activity seems to help insulate me from unwanted feelings. Going for a walk and thinking about Reddit can seem kind of stupid. It seems better to be in the present moment and enjoy the world around me, especially on a beautiful spring day. But without that I end up focusing on various things I don't like in my life, and enjoying the experience even less.
There was also a change regarding food my mother cooks that I generally loved. Suddenly, for the first time, that happiness was gone. I only saw it as something unhealthy, fried, with too much oil in it. Normally I understand this issue theoretically, but my feelings focus on the habitual happy state of helping my mother make that and eating it.
Seems like I'm doing a kind of splitting, keeping the terrible experiences with my mother separate from the at least somewhat happy experiences. Fully processing theses feelings lead to the conclusion that psychological peace, not having to deal with the bad experiences with my mother, is far more important than enjoying good experiences with her cooking. Time spent online may help avoid this processing.
It may seem like the obvious solution is getting away from her. But I've almost never had okay experiences with being with other people offline. The other obvious problem with my life is lack of offline socializing. Even when I lived on my own, I felt addicted to the internet, apparently for relieving loneliness.

If this is the wrong place to ask, please guide me to the right place.
One day around 2 years ago, my dad basically woke up with severe nerve pain. Basically a huge web of nerves in his torso are going haywire all the time, causing frequent severe spasms. It has completely degraded his quality of life. On his best days he can barely get to the mailbox and back. He had to completely relearn how to move so he wouldn't cause spasms. He had to unlearn basic muscle memory for things like grabbing milk out of the fridge. If he slips I'm honestly afraid it might kill him. This has caused significant physical degradation. He can't sit at a computer chair for more than 2 hours before needing to lay down or in a recliner for at least 30 mins. Work didn't provide any accommodations and when they stopped work from home, he was left incapable of working, and work recommended he go on short term disability. The medical system is really slow, so they didn't even find out what the source of his pain was within the STD timeframe, and he was put on Long Term Disability. Eventually a specialist figured out what the nature of his condition was and found the first treatment that actually stopped the spasming, Nerve Ablation. Radiofrequency Nerve Ablation is supposed to be done every 3 months, but the spasming started again after about 6 weeks from his first procedure and was back to full strength by 8 weeks. Also this didn't remove all his pain, the nerve spasming has left his shoulders and chest in extreme musculoskeletal pain, his only relief is when he's motionless and medicated.
Pretty much right after his first procedure, his insurance called and basically told him his condition is being managed and that he is ready to go back to work. They didn't even get his condition right, they described it as musculoskeletal stiffness, so he was left with no option but to appeal. We got his whole medical file and I've been organizing it for him (it's an absolute nightmare). There is no rehabilitation plan from the doctors in the case file, which includes the doctor's notes from his dr.'s appointments. There's no 'moving forward', no plans from anyone. Oh also despite his condition being 'managed', the time between his first procedure and second procedure was over 4 months, instead of the 3 he was told was supposed to happen. So it's not like he's even getting the treatment he's supposed to on time. Even if it was on time it only relieved him for half that time, leaving him no opportunity to rehabilitate before the spasming starts again. Also there's a signed note from his family doctor from just weeks before the claim was dismissed saying he's not ready to return to work yet.
They seem to think that since it's an office and sedentary that he should be able to just return to work. He can't drive due to his meds, he can't walk from the car to the office, he can't carry any weight (a water bottle is too much for him on his spasming side and he needs a cane in his good hand) [also keep in mind the difference between carry and lift, he can lift a milk jug because it's done so quickly, as opposed to carrying that weight over a distance], and he couldn't sit in the office chair for more than 2 hours before laying down, and laying down specifically was not accommodated at his office back when he first was 'suggested' to go on Short Term Disability. Getting a chance to stand up and move is not enough.
Insurance cut him off, and just today his CPP disability claim was dismissed because his doctor didn't provide them with documentation in time. He's so worried about his own suicidality that he had my mom hide his pain meds so he wouldn't OD on them. This long, slow process has been chipping away at his mental fortitude, between the constant pain and the stress he's completely hopeless, a shell of himself. His cognition has also degraded in this time, from the pain or from the mental aspect, I don't know. It's been really scary to see him spiral, and I have definitely seen the most of his day to day. Despite all of this, he actually does want to return to the workforce when his condition is actually being managed, that's a major part of his despair actually, he sees himself as worthless if he doesn't work.
We're getting in contact with a disability lawyer to help, but I'm really hoping to find any and all assistance that might be available. Lawyers are expensive and without his disability claim he is dangerously close to being completely screwed financially. Please, any ideas?

Hello!
I’m 27F, 102kg, occasional tramadol (related to what I’m going to describe), occasional zopiclon, multivitamin for gastric bypass.
I have had pain in the hip area for years now and I’ve seen physical therapists multiple times. My gp finally sent me to an orthopaedic doc. After a ct scan he suspects my femur is turned inwards too much. I don’t know what it’s called in English. But that could cause the pain. To be 100% (or more than almost sure) he prescribed me a cortisone shot. If the shot doesn’t relieve the pain, he thinks the pain might come from something else, but don’t know what yet, we will look further if that’s the case.
I got the shot almost three weeks ago. I know it takes some time for the shot to fully work. The pain was gone for two to three days and now I think the pain is coming back. Before the shot I was constantly in pain. Now it differs from day to day. Right now it feels uncomfortable, yesterday I was painfree and the day before was unbearable without painkillers.
I don’t know how to explain it well, but could it be that the shot doesn’t ‘work’ the same everyday? Or should the shot relieve me from all the pain until its effects has worn off?
I have a next appointment with my doc half of June, but I’d like to prepare myself and I want to know, for a little bit, what to expect. If the pain does come from my x-leg, I’ll be having surgery this year.
Hope I explained it well enough and that someone can answer my question! :)