So I am 26 years old. I am from Melbourne Australia. I am single and I live with my mother, my step-dad, my brother and my sister in law who have just moved back in recently after having moved out of home 3 years ago, but have moved back in to save money to eventually move out into the country somewhere. They are not really city/suburb people. The prefer regional/rural areas.
Anyway, the problem in our family is my step dad. I would say for the last 5-6 years, he has withdrawn alot from us. He spends the majority of his time (when he is not at work) sitting outside smoking, drinking and watching YouTube videos on his phone. We barely see him except for weekends because he works the afternoon/evening shifts.
When we do see him on weekends, he barely ever wants to do anything with us. We are always inviting him out to do things with us, but the majority of the time, he says no and uses the excuse of staying home to look after the dogs to get out of it. The only thing that we really do anymore is watch our show together on Saturday nights (if we haven't got something on, which we often do), but even that he is starting to lose interest in.
He also get sick quite often. He has a really bad cough due to his heavy smoking. I have never smoked in my life. My mum, brother and sister in law have, but they have all given up regular cigarettes now and either vape or use marijuana. I would honestly prefer if they just ditched the vapes and just smoked the marijuana to be honest and I have never had a problem with people who smoke pot as long as you do it safely and don't drive on it. It smells way better than cigarettes or the horrible artificial smell of vapes. Anyway, that's not the point.
He (my step dad) has also claimed to be on a meat and dairy only diet for the past couple of years now, basically the complete opposite of a vegan, yet we constantly see him eating bread, chips and other regular foods that are not part of his carnivore diet. He also makes a massive mess in the kitchen every time he cooks his food and never cleans it up because he cooks and attempts to clean in the dark without the light on.
We all think (myself, mum, my brother and sister in law) all think he had some severe health problems like potentially lung cancer and maybe even early onset dementia, but her just will not go to the doctor.
My brother and sister in law even said that one of the main reasons they moved out in the first place 3 years ago was because of how uncomfortable they felt around him and now they are saying the exact same thing again. They said it again literally tonight.
He also does not have a very good relationship with either of his biological children (my step brother and step sister). He says that he wishes that he talked to and saw them more, yet he makes little to no effort to see them or spend time with them outside of special occasions like birthdays, despite the fact that his son lives 10 minutes around the corner. His daughter lives a few hours away, but you would think he would make the time to see her more often, especially since his daughter now has a daughter, making him a grandfather.
He also sleeps in a completely separate room to my mum too which I believe severely impacts their relationship. Couples who do not sleep in the same bed together (for the most part) I believe do not wore every well in general. Now to be fair, this is mainly due to the fact that he snores very loudly and has too wear a massive CPAP machine at night which would keep mum awake, so he eventually just moved into the spare room. That part of it I get, but it's still not ideal.
And the worst part is, all that is just scratching the surface. My mum is constantly ranting and complaining to me about how much she has had enough and is fed up with him just doing nothing and not wanting to be a part of the family any more and just retreating into himself and I completely agree with her as well.
My mum and step dad have been together for 20 years this year, but I know for a fact that she does not love him anymore and wants to break up with him and end the relationship. Not only has she flat out told me this in private, but she wouldn't even have to tell me for me to know.
The biggest problem however and the primary reason why she won't separate from his is money. They have a mortgage for the house in both their names, many contracts are in both their names as well for things that we have done to the house like adding the solar panels, the battery backup for the solar panels, the renovations etc. A few joint accounts too.
Mum has told me so many times that if she were to win the lottery, she would leave him in a heartbeat. The money side of things and so many things being in both their names makes the situation so much harder. Mum has also said that she could not afford to live in our house if they split up as just a one person salary would not cover everything. I currently do not have a job and am actively;y looking for a new one after leaving a toxic work environment recently, but I do my part by paying for the houses monthly internet bill which lowers the cost of my board and my brother and sister in law also chip in in their way, but I still don't know if that would be enough.
Now of course, I love my step dad. I really do. He has been my main father figure in my life for the past 20 years since my mum divorced my real dad in 1999 when I was 2 years old. I still see my real dad on a regular basis and we have a good relationship, but I obviously have not lived with him 24/7 like I have with my step dad for 20 years. It's just that unfortunately, he is just not working in our family anymore and something has to change.
I guess what I am asking for is some advice and some help. Is there a way that we can move on from him? Is there a way where we can get him out of our lives without our lives being shaken up in the process. We have lived in this house for 18 years and it is our home. The thought of moving somewhere else just because we wouldn't be able to afford it anymore is heartbreaking to me. I know I may eventually move out one day if I get a girlfriend or whatever, but more heartbreaking for my mum than anything else.
So my question to you all is, has anyone out there reading this experienced the same sort of thing I have just described to you and if so, how did you manage to get out of it (if you did) and get your family back again? Any sort of advice or information or whatever else you can give me would be so much appreciated.
Thank you for reading and listening.

Some backstory: My brother(20) was in a motorcycle accident and was a 3 on the GCS and has a confirmed grade 3 DAI, shattered femur and arm. He was medically kept under for about a week because he was going through surgeries back to back for days. He's gone through levels 1-3 on the RLAS over the course of the last 2 weeks since his last surgeries and is now in level 4. He is very agitated and very confused. He isn't very coherent when speaking and says confusing things, he seems to be having delusions. When the TV is on he sometimes will think he is doing the things in the movie/show, and will get angry because we aren't helping him get things done. He accuses us of speaking gibberish to him, he accuses us of purposefully messing with him, like spinning his TV, which we weren't doing. When we tell him we aren't doing that he argues. He told us there was 2 TVs which I assume is a sign he's having double vision. He is also very repetitive. Sometime he enjoys his music playing but he will get angry saying were playing the same songs over and over again but will be saying over and over repetitively for 8 minutes straight. I visit him 6 days a week but he told me that when I leave I am gone for weeks and was angry that I leave him alone for weeks and never come back. I did some picture cards with him, which he said he wanted to try to do, he clearly struggled to recall the names of the items and would get very agitated saying I was not letting him answer or I was switching the cards or I was trying to confuse him on purpose. He was able to identify one of the cards which was a carrot but he called it a green carrot. And then every card after that one when he tried to recall the name of the item he just said greencarrotcard and then would stumble and then attack me for not helping him or not giving him time to answer(when I had not interrupted or said anything). He asked me to tell him the name of the item on another card and was able to repeat it after I told him, but he was only able to do this once. He has been unable to name anyone but seems to recognize people. He remembered lyrics to one of his favorite songs when we played it for him. He was moved from ICU to SDU to a regular hospital room this week (I assume because he is physically healed a lot from his surgeries) and I haven't been able to speak to his doctors or anyone doing any kind of therapy with him because they haven't been there when I've been visiting after work and the nurses that aren't in the ICU don't seem to really understand what's going on with him. One of them asked us if he's able to follow commands when taking medicine and asked about his agitation which made me feel like she didn't know about his TBI before we explained it to her. He is strapped down on his working arm and sometimes his abdomen because he will pull off his leads and tubes which is obviously a source of frustration but a necessary one I understand.
I understand these are all normal with his injuries. And he seems to be very textbook level 4 on the RLAS. I have been reading everyone's stories on this forum and its been very helpful. The doctors hadn't explained the RLAS or anything about his recovery except that everyone's recovery is different but it could take a year or more for him to recover. I've been reading people who have gone through very similar things or had loved ones go through very similar things and its been very comforting knowing these things are relatively normal for people with his injuries and that people can recover to having a quality of life.
But I've seen a lot of different things with how long people spend in each level, some people seem to be in levels 1-3 for months and some people just a day or 2. Obviously the later levels will take longer to go through but I was hoping everyone could explain about how long they/loved ones spent in each level. I was also wondering if some peoples progression on the scale halt or permanently stop sometimes on middle levels. Its hard to not feel like this is what he is always going to be like. Its only been 3 weeks and he seems to be progressing relatively well for someone who came in as a 3 GCS. I know a lot of the time people who come in as a 3 GCS don't wake up at all and I am very grateful he is where he is but its almost harder seeing him awake and so lost and confused and not himself. I know every TBI is different but I would just like some more information on what is possible for him and what I should be prepared for.

For about a month now, I've been following Emkfit's HIIT hop workouts on YouTube three to four times a week. Also, I walk my dog and try to walk most days, with maybe one day a week when I don't do anything. But I work at a desk and don't do much else besides that. Does anyone else do these exercises? If so, have they helped you? Unfortunately, I can tell that my butt is getting smaller and my legs are getting firmer. But I started taking prednisone a month ago for my arthritis, and my stomach is swelling a lot. If I keep at it, I think the extra weight will just melt off when I stop taking the medicine. Do you want me to remember anything from this for the next time?

This is going to be long, sorry about that.
Hi, so I, a male (27), I have to put the reality that I have a bulged disc and have to to rest for 2 months while I get back to normal; with the assistance of physical therapist, medicine, and rest/ stretches. I have told my family but well they said “you still have to pull your weight” but that pain is an 11/10 after a while. I’m doing better now as I’m able to stand and walk longer; sitting takes its toll still. But they really don’t like me to rest. My mom (F, 52) advocates to go against PT advice and well she did that and now she has a calcified herniated disc due to her stubbornness; she didn’t want to listen to her own PT’s advice.
So my family takes these stray pregnant cat into the apartment. We noticed she has a flea collar and looked clean; but she could have been out there for months or weeks. And well the stray actually gave birth that same day. So that great right? Well on the 3rd day of having her; we were Looking for 2 kittens that ran around and we found them. However, my mom hears the dog howling downstairs and is like “if you go down there, bring him up, my poor dog is losing it”. The dog is a chihuahua / Yorkie mix that clearly has separation anxiety. So I go down there, take a break while they are upstairs and raise my legs cause pain started coming. I bring the dog back up because well she said “they’ve brought the dogs up and it’s went well”. So I bring the dog up, struggling, but I do it (I’m using a cane). We had a gate that would keep the stray in a room. As I get there, my sister (F, 25) is next to the gate. My mom says “let him down”, to which I do. The stray hears that and my sister to slow to react, being next to the gate allows the cat to shove the gate and goes for my dog. I jump into action and try holding the cat down with my arm cause well, it’s my dog; had him since a puppy for crying out loud. And I saw her stance, we own cats (for years), stray was getting ready to jump and attack my dog, so I had to jump. But remember I have a bulged disc on my right side. So I jump and she leaves me with 4 bites; deep hole in my wrist and forearm and a bunch of scratches. I mean seeing that on my body, I’ve never been so enraged. The damage was insane and that happened like 12:45-1pm. But I got up; hurting up my progress for my disc and my arm beat with holes; both on my right side, mind you. My sister and mother tell me told me to leave and didn’t thank me for preventing another attack on my dog. I went downstairs trying to calm down. My mom tried to remedy it to gain sympathy and I’m like “kick the stray out or once the babies are good, kick her out”. I felt like reprimanding the stray for how she left my body and hurt my dog. I was trying to calm down and my mother decided to blast music and I’m like “can you turn it off for a few minutes? I’m trying to calm down”. She respond with “No I want some noise, some music”. I responded with “or call animal control cause I’m going up there for quietness, it was that loud. She’s like “no and says I’ll call the police on you if you go up there”. I’m like “call them, I just took a photo of my arm and it’s time stamped before you call them because she is a stray”. I go there and just drop on the bed but my sister and mom were telling me to leave. It doesn’t stop bleeding so I call my GF (F 25) because she has had cats and dogs and saved strays too. And she also agree that if she attacked once. She agrees I did the right thing to protect my dogs and I confided in her in how I wanted to reprimand the cat because my family told me to the leave the room and didn’t help me calm down. My GF advised that I got to the ER after I told her the situation to get my rabies shot. So I went, as I’m there my bulged disc starts hurting like crazy. I try using multiple chairs to elevate my legs to reduce the pain but pain is like 8/10. I had to do scans for an x-ray and my arm I notice is still squirting and oozing and entry bite wounds are black, my wrist is swollen to the point gravity hurts it; I honestly felt like crying; back is now 8/10 in pain and wrist 9/10. The radiologist made me do poses that were uncomfortable and hurt like crazy. They do a bl$&d analysis and are like “we think we’re gonna give you antibiotics and re-administer some vaccines cause that stray looks like it had something in its bites, as determined from the entry wounds. The swelling was also another worrisome thing about it, so they gave 3 Tylenols, tetanus shot, rabies shot, and 4 antibiotics for each wound. They were painful and I had gone through so much pain for the day, I could barely walk home at this point and felt like my right arm and leg were gonna fall off my body. At this time I realized my family didn’t even offer to help me. When I got home I needed to raise my legs for a few minutes and didn’t want to be in their vicinity. As I’m still letting that help me, my sister is like “Hi, scoot over, my drink is here” and I’m like “There is an empty sofa over there?” And she says “is it even that bad?” referring to my right wrist and forearm injury from the stray. I’m like “no shit, if I got 8-9 shots, now give me a minute, I’ll move soon”. She’s like “well I want to sit here”. I’m like “how about you check on the stray you sided with while I protected our dog? And stop being a d@$&head” And she makes the excuse “she stopped or was gonna stop!” And she said “you didn’t have to stop her”. I’m like “I did something you both weren’t going to do or were to slow to do and I needed to protect our dog” and her response is “who’s gonna protect her?”. My mom smiling and laughing and I’m like “I protect our dog and not even a thank you, Screw it”. And I continued with “yall didn’t really care if I was okay not even to help”. Luckily my GF was on the phone hearing everything and as I’m talking her to make me feel less alone, my mom blasts the music on purpose so I couldn’t hear her or her me but I had earphones with a mic. We concluded that it was best to Alienate myself from my family. AITA for trying to remove the cats?
Update 1: So it’s been a week since I wrote this. We tried to have someone from a none-profit organization to collect the kittens cause the living environment that my family has them in includes housing them in a location that can be taken at anytime. Feeding them from 3-6 hours, not picking up the feces or fecal matter. We tried talking to them the day before about surrendering the cats. So I wouldn’t have to call animal control and go straight to a caring resource. My family threatened to destroy my property and things, including kicking me out to an unstable apartment or throwing my stuff out, if I didn’t return the cats. I ended up crying in the middle of a train station with my GF and made a compromise to keep my stuff until I move it to storage (like my family wanted) and live with my family once I returned the cats. So I comprised and brought the cats back.
Update 2: it’s been 2 weeks and now my family wants me to leave, even though they have the cats. And that I need to go but I don’t have anywhere to officially go. Do you have any words for my situation?

First sorry for my bad grammar.
1,5 years ago I (f28) found out my tubes are fully blocked I can't get pregnant naturally. Yes there are stories it happens but my husband (27) and I already TTC for 3 years before I found out about my blocked tubes. So we started icsi last fall. It was really stressfull for me. But we handeld it very well together. We paid a lot money for it and still do.
In december last year the second egg was transferd and after 2 weeks I found out I was pregnant (the first transfer didn't stick). Only 1 week later I bleed and the doctor told me the embryo will not grow and gave me medicine to abort. After 2 weeks it was still there. I had to go to the hospital to get a curretage. I think I still haven't realize what happend to me, I just kept going. A lot woman having to go thru the same.
The younger brother (22) of my husband got his girlfriend (21) of 3 month "accidentally" pregnant. With "accidentally" I mean they didn't do anything to not get pregnant and "just let it happens". She never worked a day in her life wants everything brand new for the baby and smoked the whole pregancy. She delivered the baby in the beginning of this year.
While I grief about my lost embryo the family of my husband celebrate the birth of my niece. It was so surreal. I blocked at this time everyone. My husband was a little bit overwhelmed with the situation. He was there for me and griefed for himself but on the other hand he was happy about the first baby in this family. I was not. I asked him not to speak about the baby. He did not speak about it.
But after 2 month I met the baby and it was horror for me. I felt so sick and seeing my husband holding and talking to a new born was the worst. My husband saw how bad I felt at this situation but kinda ignore it "to make it not more worse" he said.
We had an argument after, my husband complained why he can't talk about the baby and why I act like that at the meeting. He felt like he could'nt be happy about the baby of this brother. I got so angry and made him claer that he can talk with everyone about this goddamn baby but not with me and that I don't want to meet this baby in the near future. It was just not good for me.
He understood my point and was kinda surprised that the misscariage still effect me so much. We talked about it a lot and from than we never talked about the baby and his brother and girlfriend again. He's getting pictures of the baby but never show them to me. And I haven't meet them again.
But I'm getting the feeling that I need to start to calm down and stop pretending like the baby didn't excist for me/us. I will meet the baby again now or later. But I'm still very scared because of the next meeting with them and don't know how to get thru it again.
So, AITA for my attitude and kinda ignore the family of my husband until I feel better (if this will ever happens)?

Is the Story of Adam and Eve literally true, parable, or pure myth?

According to The Book of Akash, the story of Adam and Eve is a Midrash (Jewish story for children meant to teach a moral lesson) based upon Pharaoh Ay (as Adam) and Queen Khiyah (as Eve), who lived in the walled Garden of Meru-Aten and were cast out of Meru-Aten by General Horemheb who wanted to become Pharaoh.The Book of Akash says:*Ay was a reincarnation of the the soul of the first Adam (Adapa of Eridu), who later reincarnated as Enoch, Adamu the second king of Assyria, Melchizedek king of Salem, and then as Ay son of Yuya.
*Ay was the father of Nefertiti who married Amenhotep IV who changed his name to Akhenaten. Nefertiti had six daughters and one son: Tutenkhamun (Tut). Akhenative closed down the temples to Amun, putting the priests out of business, and built the City of Aten (Atentaten), and also a royal residence called the walled Garden of Meru-Aten, in what is now Amarna, Egypt. Meru-Aten had fruit trees of all kinds, and a sacred fig tree dedicated to Hathor goddess of fertility. It also had a petting zoo and evaporation pond.
*After Tut died, Ay was made Pharaoh, at the age of 70, but his wife died years before. Soon after being made Pharaoh Ay's only son, Nakhtmin, died. This left Ay without an heir to the throne.
*Ay knew that if he begot another son, that son had to have the blood of Amenhotep III (father of Akhenaten) in order to have the divine right to the throne. So Ay marries Khiyah (Ankhesenpaaten) who was Queen as wife of her brother King Tut. Khiyah was the daughter of Akhenaten, the son of Amenhotep III. Amenhotep III was married to Ay's sister who was the mother of Amenhotep IV (Akhenaten). Akhenaten claimed to be Aten in the flesh and Ay was given the title "Father of the God".
*Horemheb, general of the army, desired to be Pharaoh. So he had Akhennaten poisoned, then Nefertiti, then Tut, and tried to marry Khiyah, but she rejected him and she tried to marry a Hittite prince but Horemheb had the HIttite prince assassinated as soon as he reached Canaan (then controlled by Egypt).
*Ay married Khiyah (Ankhesenpaaten later renamed Akhensenpaamun), so that his "claim" to the throne would be strengthened (her paternal grandfather was Amenhotep III and her maternal grandfather was Ay son of Yuya father of Nefertiti. Yes, Ay married his own granddaughter. Why? So that he could beget a son (Nakhtmin was dead) who had royal bloodline back to Amenhotep III, and thus had a "divine right" to the throne of Egypt.
*Akhensenpaaten/Akhensenpaamun (nicknamed "Khiyah") agreed to marry her grandfather because she was "tempted" by the Cobra Crown: symbolic of the Wisdom of the Gods. Only the King and Queen of Egypt wore the Cobra Crown. This is the meaning that Eve was "tempted" by the serpent. It was not real serpent, but a crown. It "tempted" Khiyah like diamond rings "tempt" women.
*Eve being made from the "rib" of Adam is a play on Hebrew words, since "penis" and "rib" is the same word in Hebrew: TSELA. Eve (Khiyah) was made from the TSELA (penis) of Adam (Ay): meaning she was made out of his seed (i.e. daughter or granddaughter).*The Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil does not refer to a literal tree, but to "carnal knowledge" (sex) which can be both for good and for evil.
*The Tree of Life is not a literal tree, but a symbol of the placenta. Every placenta has large veins that resemble a "tree" on it. YWHW "took away the tree of life" and prevented Adam and Eve from partaking of it: the meaning is that YWHW prevented them from conceiving a son (because what they were doing was a sin unto death).
*Egyptians in that time ate figs and wore fig leaves when they wanted to conceive a firstborn son. The firstborn son was heir of the family and responsible for taking care of the parents when they became too old to work. The fig tree was sacred to Hathor, goddess of wisdom. The Garden of Meru-Aten had a sacred fig tree. Eating figs and wearing sewn-together fig leaves (sacred to Hathor) was thought necessary to ensure that a couple would conceive a healthy first-born son.*Via his spies at Meru-Aten, General Horemheb discovered that Ay and Khiyah were trying to conceive a son. Horemheb then took his generals and raided Meru-Aten at night. They tied their swords with rags and poured oil on them and let them in order to see (flaming sword). Egyptian generals wore armor of polished brass and thus were called "Shining Ones" (Hebrew: "Cherubim"). Horemheb cast them out of the Garden of Meru-Aten into the desert where they perished. Their servants found them and buried them in sheep skins.*Horemheb becomes Pharaoh, but has no heir (he was gay).
*Ay was the reincarnation of Enoch. Enoch was made the Angel Metatron and adopted by YWHW as a firstborn Son (Third Book of Enoch). As Metatron he was "Mediator" between YWHW and human kind. But with his major sin as Ay, the Soul of Enoch lost his "station" as Metatron. He lost his inheritance. He became the Prodigal Son.
*Ay and Khiyah had to reincarnate, be born of literal virgins (Mary and St. Ann), live sinless lives, celibate lives, and Ay, being Adam/Enoch reincarnated, had to die on a fig tree in order to atone for the "original sin" of the Soul of Adam in the Garden of Meru-Aten in 1320 B.C. in Amarna, Egypt.*Jesus knew who He was. He called himself "the Son of Man" (a term for Enoch). He knew that he would have to die on a fig tree in order to atone for committing the "original sin" with Khiyah in the Garden of Meru-Aten: where Ay and Khiyah ate figs, and wore fig leaves, and tried to beget a son and heir to the throne
.*The punishment of Khiyah (who became Mary) was to lead a celibate life, and to watch her beloved Son be tortured and die on a cross made from a fig tree. This is why Jesus cursed a fig tree on His way to Jerusalem: because it reminded Him of the Original Sin, and that He needed to die on such a tree. He was not looking forward to it, but knew He had to do it in order to regain His lofty station as the Angel Metatron.
*Atonement was made, and the Soul of Adam/Enoch regained the station of Metatron (Mediator) and First-Born. Ay was the Prodigal Son who lost his inheritance, and Jesus was the Prodigal Son who was welcomed back by the Father.*How do I know this? Guessing ? No. I was to the right of Jesus, on another cross, and said to Him : "Lord, remember me when you come into your kingdom" and Jesus replied: "Truly I say unto you, today you will be with me in Paradise." My name was Ebion. I was an Essene, and the Romans crucified me for "stealing from Rome" (i.e. not paying taxes and telling other Jews not to pay taxes to Rome either). In the eyes of Rome I was a "thief". But I was a celibate and spiritual man, an Essene. I knew Jesus was the Messiah, and he called me to follow Him, but I refused because I did not want to lose my position as Treasurer of the Essenes in Jerusalem. I knew Who He was, but I could not leave my high station and the admiration of the other Essenes. How do I know this? I was told that by a psychic woman, and also Jesus appeared to me, emerging from a wall in my room, when I was 18. He was porcelain white, and had a crown of thorns. He moaned, and I saw a large drop of white blood running from a large thorn in His temple running down the right side of His head. As God and Jesus are My Two Witnesses: that is what I saw and what I heard.
*Jesus never wrote a book during His life. But He wrote a book through my hand, called The Book of Akash. It contains the truth about God and the Cosmos: the only two things that exist. Answers to all the mysteries of the Cosmos can be found therein.*The following YouTube video explains somewhat about the history of Ay son of Yuya, Khiyah, Tut, and Horemheb (played by a black man in the video). The video suggests that Ay had Tut killed in order to become Pharaoh. Not true at all. Ay loved his grandson Tut. It was Horemheb who poisoned Akhenaten (because he closed down the Amun priesthood and temples), and Nefertiti, and Tut, and Nakhtmin. Horemheb was a very evil man, and did evil, and gained the throne for himself by murder and strategy.
*The story of Adam and Eve in Genesis is a Midrash (Jewish moral parable story for children). It was based upon the real story of Pharaoh Ay and Queen Khiyah. The "details" of the story were hidden in metaphors (talking snake, Eve being made from the "rib" (tsela) of Adam, Cherubim with flaming sword, etc.). The story is not "myth" but based upon real people and real events in ancient Egypt in 1324 to 1320 B.C.
*Jesus has reincarnated five times. I met His fourth reincarnation, who was a miracle worker from Lebanon who was born in Jerusalem in 1909 and died in New York City in 1984. I first saw His face in 1977 when I was 16 years old. He visited me with lightning with no thunder, to my home, in the year 2005. His fifth incarnation is alive on Earth today, incognito. No...not me (God forbid!) but a man who works miracles. Jesus will incarnate for the 7th time in the 24th century (2300s), and, after Armageddon, will establish His Kingdom, called the United Order, a political, judicial, economic, and religious Order, that will last a thousand years.*We all have up to 6,000 lifetimes in order to reach Nirvana, and if we do not reach Nirvana by that time we shall be thrown into the Lake of Fire (when the Giant Red Sun engulfs the Earth) and simply cease to exist.
*Our current life is our Day of Account for our deeds in our last life, and our next life will be our Day of Account for our actions, good and bad, in this life.
*We are all judged by the Universal Law of Karma, and we are all judged according to our works, good and evil, and receive an exactly just recompense for our actions: good and evil. Whatsoever we shall sow, that also shall we reap.
Watch the YouTube video. It is a good introduction to the true historical story of Ay and Khiyah. But, again, please note: Ay did not harm Tut, but loved him. Ay did not marry Khiyah for sex, but to beget a son and heir who had a divine right to the throne of Egypt. It was a sin unto death, and they died. And they came back and atoned. Jesus is the Prodigal Son. Watch the video. It is not long. Please share this post with others. Thank you.
https://youtu.be/J2dEV9MO8_U

Is the Story of Adam and Eve literally true, parable, or pure myth?

According to The Book of Akash, the story of Adam and Eve is a Midrash (Jewish story for children meant to teach a moral lesson) based upon Pharaoh Ay (as Adam) and Queen Khiyah (as Eve), who lived in the walled Garden of Meru-Aten and were cast out of Meru-Aten by General Horemheb who wanted to become Pharaoh.The Book of Akash says:*Ay was a reincarnation of the the soul of the first Adam (Adapa of Eridu), who later reincarnated as Enoch, Adamu the second king of Assyria, Melchizedek king of Salem, and then as Ay son of Yuya.
*Ay was the father of Nefertiti who married Amenhotep IV who changed his name to Akhenaten. Nefertiti had six daughters and one son: Tutenkhamun (Tut). Akhenative closed down the temples to Amun, putting the priests out of business, and built the City of Aten (Atentaten), and also a royal residence called the walled Garden of Meru-Aten, in what is now Amarna, Egypt. Meru-Aten had fruit trees of all kinds, and a sacred fig tree dedicated to Hathor goddess of fertility. It also had a petting zoo and evaporation pond.
*After Tut died, Ay was made Pharaoh, at the age of 70, but his wife died years before. Soon after being made Pharaoh Ay's only son, Nakhtmin, died. This left Ay without an heir to the throne.
*Ay knew that if he begot another son, that son had to have the blood of Amenhotep III (father of Akhenaten) in order to have the divine right to the throne. So Ay marries Khiyah (Ankhesenpaaten) who was Queen as wife of her brother King Tut. Khiyah was the daughter of Akhenaten, the son of Amenhotep III. Amenhotep III was married to Ay's sister who was the mother of Amenhotep IV (Akhenaten). Akhenaten claimed to be Aten in the flesh and Ay was given the title "Father of the God".
*Horemheb, general of the army, desired to be Pharaoh. So he had Akhennaten poisoned, then Nefertiti, then Tut, and tried to marry Khiyah, but she rejected him and she tried to marry a Hittite prince but Horemheb had the HIttite prince assassinated as soon as he reached Canaan (then controlled by Egypt).
*Ay married Khiyah (Ankhesenpaaten later renamed Akhensenpaamun), so that his "claim" to the throne would be strengthened (her paternal grandfather was Amenhotep III and her maternal grandfather was Ay son of Yuya father of Nefertiti. Yes, Ay married his own granddaughter. Why? So that he could beget a son (Nakhtmin was dead) who had royal bloodline back to Amenhotep III, and thus had a "divine right" to the throne of Egypt.
*Akhensenpaaten/Akhensenpaamun (nicknamed "Khiyah") agreed to marry her grandfather because she was "tempted" by the Cobra Crown: symbolic of the Wisdom of the Gods. Only the King and Queen of Egypt wore the Cobra Crown. This is the meaning that Eve was "tempted" by the serpent. It was not real serpent, but a crown. It "tempted" Khiyah like diamond rings "tempt" women.
*Eve being made from the "rib" of Adam is a play on Hebrew words, since "penis" and "rib" is the same word in Hebrew: TSELA. Eve (Khiyah) was made from the TSELA (penis) of Adam (Ay): meaning she was made out of his seed (i.e. daughter or granddaughter).*The Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil does not refer to a literal tree, but to "carnal knowledge" (sex) which can be both for good and for evil.
*The Tree of Life is not a literal tree, but a symbol of the placenta. Every placenta has large veins that resemble a "tree" on it. YWHW "took away the tree of life" and prevented Adam and Eve from partaking of it: the meaning is that YWHW prevented them from conceiving a son (because what they were doing was a sin unto death).
*Egyptians in that time ate figs and wore fig leaves when they wanted to conceive a firstborn son. The firstborn son was heir of the family and responsible for taking care of the parents when they became too old to work. The fig tree was sacred to Hathor, goddess of wisdom. The Garden of Meru-Aten had a sacred fig tree. Eating figs and wearing sewn-together fig leaves (sacred to Hathor) was thought necessary to ensure that a couple would conceive a healthy first-born son.*Via his spies at Meru-Aten, General Horemheb discovered that Ay and Khiyah were trying to conceive a son. Horemheb then took his generals and raided Meru-Aten at night. They tied their swords with rags and poured oil on them and let them in order to see (flaming sword). Egyptian generals wore armor of polished brass and thus were called "Shining Ones" (Hebrew: "Cherubim"). Horemheb cast them out of the Garden of Meru-Aten into the desert where they perished. Their servants found them and buried them in sheep skins.*Horemheb becomes Pharaoh, but has no heir (he was gay).
*Ay was the reincarnation of Enoch. Enoch was made the Angel Metatron and adopted by YWHW as a firstborn Son (Third Book of Enoch). As Metatron he was "Mediator" between YWHW and human kind. But with his major sin as Ay, the Soul of Enoch lost his "station" as Metatron. He lost his inheritance. He became the Prodigal Son.
*Ay and Khiyah had to reincarnate, be born of literal virgins (Mary and St. Ann), live sinless lives, celibate lives, and Ay, being Adam/Enoch reincarnated, had to die on a fig tree in order to atone for the "original sin" of the Soul of Adam in the Garden of Meru-Aten in 1320 B.C. in Amarna, Egypt.*Jesus knew who He was. He called himself "the Son of Man" (a term for Enoch). He knew that he would have to die on a fig tree in order to atone for committing the "original sin" with Khiyah in the Garden of Meru-Aten: where Ay and Khiyah ate figs, and wore fig leaves, and tried to beget a son and heir to the throne
.*The punishment of Khiyah (who became Mary) was to lead a celibate life, and to watch her beloved Son be tortured and die on a cross made from a fig tree. This is why Jesus cursed a fig tree on His way to Jerusalem: because it reminded Him of the Original Sin, and that He needed to die on such a tree. He was not looking forward to it, but knew He had to do it in order to regain His lofty station as the Angel Metatron.
*Atonement was made, and the Soul of Adam/Enoch regained the station of Metatron (Mediator) and First-Born. Ay was the Prodigal Son who lost his inheritance, and Jesus was the Prodigal Son who was welcomed back by the Father.*How do I know this? Guessing ? No. I was to the right of Jesus, on another cross, and said to Him : "Lord, remember me when you come into your kingdom" and Jesus replied: "Truly I say unto you, today you will be with me in Paradise." My name was Ebion. I was an Essene, and the Romans crucified me for "stealing from Rome" (i.e. not paying taxes and telling other Jews not to pay taxes to Rome either). In the eyes of Rome I was a "thief". But I was a celibate and spiritual man, an Essene. I knew Jesus was the Messiah, and he called me to follow Him, but I refused because I did not want to lose my position as Treasurer of the Essenes in Jerusalem. I knew Who He was, but I could not leave my high station and the admiration of the other Essenes. How do I know this? I was told that by a psychic woman, and also Jesus appeared to me, emerging from a wall in my room, when I was 18. He was porcelain white, and had a crown of thorns. He moaned, and I saw a large drop of white blood running from a large thorn in His temple running down the right side of His head. As God and Jesus are My Two Witnesses: that is what I saw and what I heard.
*Jesus never wrote a book during His life. But He wrote a book through my hand, called The Book of Akash. It contains the truth about God and the Cosmos: the only two things that exist. Answers to all the mysteries of the Cosmos can be found therein.*The following YouTube video explains somewhat about the history of Ay son of Yuya, Khiyah, Tut, and Horemheb (played by a black man in the video). The video suggests that Ay had Tut killed in order to become Pharaoh. Not true at all. Ay loved his grandson Tut. It was Horemheb who poisoned Akhenaten (because he closed down the Amun priesthood and temples), and Nefertiti, and Tut, and Nakhtmin. Horemheb was a very evil man, and did evil, and gained the throne for himself by murder and strategy.
*The story of Adam and Eve in Genesis is a Midrash (Jewish moral parable story for children). It was based upon the real story of Pharaoh Ay and Queen Khiyah. The "details" of the story were hidden in metaphors (talking snake, Eve being made from the "rib" (tsela) of Adam, Cherubim with flaming sword, etc.). The story is not "myth" but based upon real people and real events in ancient Egypt in 1324 to 1320 B.C.
*Jesus has reincarnated five times. I met His fourth reincarnation, who was a miracle worker from Lebanon who was born in Jerusalem in 1909 and died in New York City in 1984. I first saw His face in 1977 when I was 16 years old. He visited me with lightning with no thunder, to my home, in the year 2005. His fifth incarnation is alive on Earth today, incognito. No...not me (God forbid!) but a man who works miracles. Jesus will incarnate for the 7th time in the 24th century (2300s), and, after Armageddon, will establish His Kingdom, called the United Order, a political, judicial, economic, and religious Order, that will last a thousand years.*We all have up to 6,000 lifetimes in order to reach Nirvana, and if we do not reach Nirvana by that time we shall be thrown into the Lake of Fire (when the Giant Red Sun engulfs the Earth) and simply cease to exist.
*Our current life is our Day of Account for our deeds in our last life, and our next life will be our Day of Account for our actions, good and bad, in this life.
*We are all judged by the Universal Law of Karma, and we are all judged according to our works, good and evil, and receive an exactly just recompense for our actions: good and evil. Whatsoever we shall sow, that also shall we reap.
Watch the YouTube video. It is a good introduction to the true historical story of Ay and Khiyah. But, again, please note: Ay did not harm Tut, but loved him. Ay did not marry Khiyah for sex, but to beget a son and heir who had a divine right to the throne of Egypt. It was a sin unto death, and they died. And they came back and atoned. Jesus is the Prodigal Son. Watch the video. It is not long. Please share this post with others. Thank you.
https://youtu.be/J2dEV9MO8_U

I am not the OOP. The OOP is u/ThrowRAtricionera posting in TrueOffMyChest
Concluded as per OOP
2 updates - Long
Original - 2nd February 2024
Update1 - 2nd February 2024
Update2 - 17th May 2024
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My sister slept with my boyfriend and I sent her a really cruel message that I don't regret at all
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My sister slept with my boyfriend and I sent her a really cruel message that I don't regret at all Sorry but this post will have A LOT of bad energy and I'm terrible at writing in English so If anyone is going to read the post, I'm sorry for all the grammatical errors that are likely to be in the post. :P
So a few days ago I (F25) found out that my sister (24f) has been sleeping with my boyfriend (now ex, 25m. We dated for three years) for one year or probably more.
They always had a close relationship but I obviously took it as something innocent, I don't like video games but my sister does so they talked a lot by text and I thought it was about games they like until I found out that no, they talked a lot about their secret dates while I was working and in college, I found pictures, videos and a lot of other disgusting things in the chats between my ex and my sister.
My pathetic sister found pleasure in asking my pathetic ex all the time if she's smarter or prettier than me, she even compared our private parts, wth (We're both pretty, she's actually thinner and prettier than me and even if she's an introvert she has her group of friends so I really don't understand where she got so much venom towards me, our parents never compared us or anything like that and she was always the one asking my ex to compare both of us in the chats.)
The first thing I did was throw all my ex-boyfriend's things out of the apartment, I insulted him in a thousand ways and I kept the PC that I gave him for Christmas.
I didn't speak a single word to my sister for over a week and she didn't contacted me like the coward she is until yesterday when she sent me a message trying to justify herself by saying that it was a mistake (Yes, a mistake that lasted more than a year) and that I should forgive her because we're sisters and blah blah blah at one point I thought "Should I be the mature person in the situation who doesn't let resentment speak for her?" but then I realized that I've never been that kind of person. I took my phone and wrote a long message to my sister that I would love to write here but I am sure that I would break the rules since I called her out in every possible way and I wrote a lot of personal things too, I told her how much of a failure she is and how she has always envied me and that's why she needed to feel what it's like to be me for a second of her sad life.
She sent me a voice massage crying and saying that she's in a very weak moment mentally (but she's still with him, lmao) and I shouldn't make her feel worse and that she regrets it, I just reacted to her message with this emoji 😂 and didn't even heard the long voice message until the end.
Was it a low thing to attack her with all her flaws? Yes, but it's lower to betray your sister and believe that she's going to forgive you just because you share blood with her.
Honestly, I feel really good after sending her that message and feel that it was Therapeutic to take out everything I feel to give closure to that.
Btw I've never used a PC for gaming but I'm looking for tutorials on YouTube about how to download the SIMS.
I helped my sister in every moment of her life, I literally fought for her when she was being bullied during High school, I helped her thousands of times to make friends, I even accompanied her everywhere she wanted, it is a betrayal that really hurts and I will never forgive, never. It hurts me that she slept with someone I loved, but it hurts me a lot all the things I read in those chats, how she enjoyed watching him compare me to her or how she asked him about personal things about our relationship just to laugh at it. She's dead to me and my parents knows it.
I don't even care if I'm a bad person like them, this is something I can't forgive and I don't even feel bad for my reaction.
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Comments
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tsscaramel
At least your ex showed he was a POS before you got married so now you have the opportunity to find someone who actually appreciates you, sounds like an upgrade if you ask me.

OOP: To be honest the relationship was already going bad in some ways (although that doesn't justify what he did) so I don't feel too bad for breaking up, I took out the trash

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MyUsernameIsMehh
Going bad is still never an excuse to cheat. If e had the slightest bit of respect for you as a human being then he would just break up
Good riddance.
People often say "how you lose them is how you got them" so I wouldn't be surprised if she came crying to you one day about him cheating on her
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Ithink-imoverit2405
Good for you. Perpetrator only makes themselves a victim when they wanted to. Please inform your parents of the event to not let her play victim more and throw you under the bus and back the bus to hit you more times.

OOP: Thanks! They already know everything. Neither of them are on her side and they respect that I want to cut off all contact with my sister. My parents are really strict so I think they're going to cut contact with her too but that's their decision, I don't want to get into that and cause problems

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The message - same day
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Thank you for all the nice comments you left me! Many wrote to me with tips for the sims and I'm really grateful, thanks for the game recommendations even though I'm really bad at playing action game, The last action game I played was Resident Evil 4 on the PS2 long time ago and it was because I had a crush with Leon Kennedy (he would never cheat on me btw).
As a token of appreciation (And because I also like it when the op uploads the whole gossip), I will put here half of the message I sent to my sister.
The message I sent her was really long and I cut out the parts where I talk about very private things or when I insulted her to not make the post too uncomfortable because I was really hurt and angry at that moment and I talked about many personal things in the text. I will put the copy of the message in the end if someone talks Spanish. I'm sorry if it sounds weird in English, I did my best to translate it and I had to remove a lot of parts.
"I'm not interested in hearing any of your excuses, I believed you when a problem she had with her ex-friend group happened because I really trusted that you would never do something like that but now I understand why everyone leaves you alone and you deserve it.
What you did to me is a shit and you know it but you didn't care because you spent a year being the whore of ex name without any shame and now that I found out everything you went days without talking to me because you are a coward and on top of that you still don't care about what you did to me, You're only talking to me because Dad probably stopped talking to you and you're running out of money, so you want to fix this shit so he gives you money again.
You were always an asshole but don't you think it's a lot to be my boyfriend's second woman? How little respect do you have for yourself? We're sisters, I don't even know what's going on in your head because I don't understand what's wrong with you. Girl, I read all the messages between you and you even started comparing our bodies, YOU'RE SICK.
You know that I never did anything for you to do this to me and I loved you. But everything turned out really well for you because he's with you so enjoy that feeling and the love you two have for the other for now because you are going to be really lonely later and you are going to go back to your cave but this time I am not going to be there to pity you like every time I did before.
Stay with him, there's nothing that interests me less than fighting for an idiot who is surely going to leave you but let me make it clear to you that you're not going to hear about me again, this dies here, we are not sister's anymore. If I see you on the street then I'm going to cross to the opposite sidewalk to not see you."
"No me interesa escuchar ninguna de tus excusas, yo te creí cuando pasó lo de a problem she had with her ex-friend group porque de verdad confié en que vos nunca harías algo así pero ahora entiendo por qué todos te dejan sola y te lo mereces.
Lo que me hiciste es una cagada y vos lo sabes pero no te importó porque estuviste un año siendo la trola de ex name sin ninguna vergüenza y ahora que me enteré de todo estuviste días sin hablarme porque sos re cagona y encima te sigue sin importar lo que me hiciste, solamente me estás hablando porque papá seguramente te cortó el rostro y te estás quedando sin plata así que querés arreglar tu cagada para que te vuelvan a depositar. Siempre fuiste una pelotuda fracasada pero no te parece un montón rebajarte a ese nivel de ser la segunda de mi novio? Tan poco respeto te tenés a vos misma? Somos hermanas, no sé ni que está pasando por tu cabeza porque posta no entiendo que te pasa. Flaca, leí todos los mensajes entre ustedes y te ponías a comparar nuestros cuerpos, estás re enferma.
Vos sabes que yo nunca te hice nada para que vos me hagas esto y te re quería, igual te salió re bien porque el está con vos así que disfruta por ahora ese amor que se tienen porque después te vas a quedar sola de verdad y vas a volver a tu cueva pero esta vez no voy a estar yo para tenerte lastima como siempre hice antes.
Quédate con el, no hay nada que me interese menos que pelear por un idiota que seguramente te va a dejar pero que te quede claro que de mi no vas a volver a escuchar, acá muere, no somos más hermanas y si te veo en la calle me cruzo de vereda."
Edit: Yes, I'm from Argentina :)
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Update - 3 months later
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They broke up nobody's surprised
When all of this happened my parents scolded my sister and she got offended and didn't speak to our parents except to ask them for money, she asked them for money to buy things for her career but then my aunt told my parents that my sister actually used that money to buy my ex some sneakers.
My parents never gave her any money from that day on, she's an idiot tbh. My parents started to pay for us to go to a private college and the only thing we have to do is literally STUDY, The only thing she had to do was take her studies seriously but she didn't, so my father got tired and hasn't sent her money for months.
My ex discovered the post because he said it went viral in Facebook and obviously he recognized the story, he contacted me to apologize and said he knows he did wrong by hurting me like that but my sister 'manipulated him' and it was a total mistake, I told him he can shove his apologies in the ass. Meanwhile, my sister and I have only crossed paths a few times, but she always avoids me because she thinks I'm going to hit her (I won't). We're not going to the same career so we luckily don't see each other too much
Anyway, a few days ago she went to our parents' house saying that she broke up with my ex (idk why) And that she felt really sad and had an anxiety attack, I don't know exactly what they talked about since I wasn't there but my mother told me that she told my sister that she knew what was going to happen when she slept with him and my sister justified herself by saying that 'They're in love' so my mother and her just argued again and my sister left. Now she doesn't talk to anyone in the family except our grandmother to ask for money, I know my sister is not going to change her bad habits and she didn't learn anything from this, I even think she will get together with my ex again because they're just toxic with each other but it's her life to ruin, not mine and I don't care anymore.
The bright side: I sold the pc to a guy from reddit that saw my post and that really saved me from having to keep paying the dues, unfortunately I didn't get to play The Sims much but I prefer the extra money. My ex had told me that he wanted the pc back but I told him that then he should pay the remaining dues AND HE SAID NO, so the idiot wanted the pc for free even though he slept with my sister. 🥴
The weird side: There are YouTubers who are literally charging their subscribers to read the post or other reddit posts in their podcast, tf, at least give me a share of the profits.
I'm know it's a boring update and probably everyone wanted that the update was my sister begging for forgiveness and my ex suffering but no, they are just two idiots who deserve each other and nothing more happened but even today I received a message asking me for an update, haha.
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Comments
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Driverpicksthetunes
Not even 6 months later they break up, oh yeah clearly it was twuuuuu wuvvvv 😂 glad you sold the PC and dropped the dead weight from your life
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MyUsernameIsMehh

They broke up

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

That was quick lmfao
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I am not the OOP. Please do not harass the OOP.
Please remember the No Brigading Rule and to be civil in the comments

So I'm currently trying out meds, and I was talking to my sister about it. Apparently, she thinks my nephew (7yrs) may also have ADHD (his dad has it as well). She's debating on whether to have him diagnosed because she thinks he might be too young for medicine. I think she's mostly concerned about stimulants but she didn't outwardly say it. He does pretty good in school, it's just his behavior that causes concern.
Has anyone been diagnosed this young and been taking medication? Or if you started medication as an adult, would you have preferred to have started younger?

After I said that to my dad, he said "that's good to hear".
I see he's starting to notice my changing attitude, but I wonder if he believes I'm for real with this business plan. My plan tomorrow is to make another YouTube video after I'm well rested, and work on the website. And talk about it with him and my therapist nonstop.
Hell, even my sister talked to me about it (yes, I talked to her...) She seemed to think I gave up on my dream and am not sure what I'm doing, so I owe her a YouTube video, lol.
I guess things are ok, but like... sometimes I can't finda reason why I'm gonna get out of bed each day.
Anyway. I thought of that and just had an idea.
I'm gonna post one up on the wall every morning for myself, and my dad to see first thing when he comes donwstairs. I really need this as part of my positive self talk. And ultimately my dad, if they don't serve as subliminal messages, will at least get him to realize how much he's relied on my hustle. At which point he will have to realize yes, I AM the one saving him.
Right now I am freshly single (and confused why people here are or at least have been talking to my ex?) but right now I feel a strong desire to build my business more than anything. That's how I want to be perceived by anyone new who meets me. I think I've changed so much I need someone to meet me where I'm (almost) at now...

Sorry about any selling mistakes my glasses just broke and I don't have any replacements.
For some context I am 13 almost 14 and have been diagnosed as autistic, having very bad anxiety, and being depressed to the point of SH. I have 2 sisters but they aren't important to this. I live with my Grandparents as I was adopted by them when I was 3. I really just want to know if my fear is reasonable or not. First off my grandma has always let me watch things I shouldn't be, I got into Adventures with Purpose, it is a YouTube channel where they find cars underwater for missing/dead people. This scared me a bit as I live in Minnesota and around many bodies of water and it made me more aware of were I was in the car. If it was just that I would say I was unreasonable but there's more. My grandpa is the one that drives me places, I have noticed for the past 4 or so years that he drinks a lot of beer but never questioned it, an example is that I went out with a metal detector in our yard and found about 20 beer caps. Recently I have noticed how bad my grandpa is at driving. He is most of the time in the middle of the road or almost off the road and is always speeding. He also makes really sharp turns only a few feet away from hills. Recently I was in the car with him to go pick up my sister amd he noticed that my seat was to far up and told me to put it back. When I tried and couldn't he started to yell at me and cuss at me which made me cry and he reached across me all the way to the other side of the car with one hand on the steering wheel to but the seat back. In doing this he almost hit another car and almost go off the side of the road. He also gets upset in the car a lot and since I sit in the passenger seat he normally yells and cusses at me so I stay quiet most of the time but then he complains about me not talking to him. I have also noticed that he drinks when bringing me to school and picking me up and he sometimes spends up to 400$ on cigarettes so I have also noticed that I and everything in my house smells like cigarettes and alcohol. I am now scared to get in the car as it makes me feel trapped and like something bad is about to happen and it makes me extremely vigilant in the car. I haven't told anyone besides my imidiate family about the bare minimum of what happened but I am going to see my therapist next week, should I tell her or am I being unreasonable?

A story on Amitabha recitation told by Dharma Master Shi Hui Jing
Luo Ji Ying is staying in Ling Feng village, the city He Zhou in the Province of Guang Xi, in the mainland of China. She is an illiterate and she does not have any faith in religion.
Five years ago, in the year 2011 her two daughters began to learn the Buddha Dharma.
They told their mother to recite Namo Amitabha Buddha, as she is unable to read Sutras or sitting in meditation as she is quite old, with poor memory.
Most important of all, the recitation of Namo Amitabha Buddha reaps the most supreme merits and virtues.
It is a simple practice to leave transmigration on the six paths, to leave births and deaths, to accomplish Buddhahood swiftly.
That is why they encouraged their mother to recite Namo Amitabha Buddha and mother also believed in this.
She also becomes a volunteer in a nearby temple, Xiu Feng Temple.
In the year 2012 her second daughter was pregnant.
When it was time to deliver her baby at the hospital, she faced the problem of difficult delivery.
What could she do?
An experienced doctor told the family that if the baby was not born within thirty minutes he might die of suffocation.
And it was too late to go for Caesarean.
He said that the only way to save the baby was to deliver him immediately.
Her second daughter was thus thinking,
‘Now the doctor cannot save my child. The only person who can save him is me. I am the mother. But if I can save him, I would have delivered him earlier. Now only Amitabha Buddha can save him.’
She thought about this and decided to keep calm to call on Namo Amitabha Buddha.
While her mother and sister were sitting outside, reciting Namo Amitabha Buddha too.
After a while the baby was born.
Amitabha recitation enables us to deliver our child smoothly, to be freed from a difficult labour.
In Japan, a lady also faced the difficult labour.
But she did not recite Namo Amitabha Buddha.
She was thinking about Amitabha Buddha’s 18th Vow which is thus stated,
‘On my attainment of Buddhahood, living beings in the ten directions who have faith in me sincerely seek to attain a rebirth in my Land with a joyful mind. Even if they can only recite ten times but are unable to attain a rebirth, I will not certify to the Proper Enlightenment. Exceptions are those who have committed the five rebellious acts, who slandered the Proper Dharma.’
How did she explain this, ‘Even if they can only recite ten times but are unable to attain a rebirth, I will not certify to the Proper Enlightenment’?
She explained this way, ‘If Amitabha Buddha does not help me to deliver my child, Amitabha Buddha is not Amitabha Buddha’.
Later the child was smoothly delivered.
So, whatever that we do we should connect it to Namo Amitabha Buddha.
Even though we cannot solve the problem, it will still be solved.
Luo Ji Ying was so happy to have a grandchild.
After a month, the baby was infected with gastritis.
He was sent to hospital, having high fever.
The temperature fluctuated up and down.
The grandmother was very worried.
She felt that the life of her grandson was her life.
What could she do?
She was very worried.
When we have given up all hopes in doctors, in medicines, we will surely look for another way to save this one-month-old baby, who had become very weak.
Most people will go to ask for help from the spiritual medium, am I right?
This is a normal practice among people.
Finally, she managed to find an efficacious psychic medium who can draw the magic figures to rid people of their diseases, to eradicate disaster and calamities.
The medium asked for the date of birth of the baby.
She gave the medium the time of birth, with the date, month and year.
The medium started to count and said, ‘The baby’s mother had recited Sutras and Amitabha Buddha during her pregnancy.’
She answered, ‘Yes, she did recite Sutras and Namo Amitabha Buddha.’
The medium continued to say, ‘You are also an Amitabha reciter!’
‘How do you know that?’
The medium answered, ‘Above your head there is a very huge Buddha! I do not dare to give you any amulet or magic figures!’
‘Why?’
The medium explained, ‘This is the Greatest Buddha. How dare I draw the magic figure to rid the disease? Do not worry. You go back now and your grandson will be fine.’
So, Luo Ji Ying returned home with her mind full of doubts.
She was asking about her grandson.
She did not even mention her practice in Amitabha recitation.
She was sure she did not say anything concerning the Buddha!
How did the medium get to know about the huge Buddha on top of her head?
She was thinking, ‘I recite Namo Amitabha Buddha every day but I do not even know about the Buddha above my head. I cannot even see him. But she is a medium. Surely, she can see this.’
So, she went back and told her daughters about what the medium had sad.
Wah! The whole family started to recite Namo Amitabha Buddha piously.
Besides, they also carried the baby to Xiu Feng Temple to pray to the Buddha.
Not long after that the baby was well enough to return home.
Now he is about four years old.
She said, ‘This child is truly healthy, active, clever and cute. He seldom falls sick. Sometimes, he might fall sick. He will go by himself before the Buddha and make obeisance to the Buddha.’
What does it reveal in this story?
Luo Ji Ying who recites Namo Amitabha Buddha, with Amitabha Buddha standing above her head does not know much about the Pure Land practice.
Can she recite the Amitabha Sutra? The answer is ‘No’.
Besides, there is very little teaching on Amitabha recitation at her place.
That is why when her grandson fell sick, she would still look for help from a spiritual medium.
She does not know the greatest Buddha, the most magnificent Buddha, the Buddha with the mighty ability is standing above her head.
As long as she recites the Name of the Buddha who is standing above her, everything will be ok.
But she has no idea about this.
That is why she will still search around, practising the mixed conduct.
After listening to the medium only then they realize Amitabha Buddha is the most magnificent Buddha, the Buddha with the most merits and virtues.
Once we have decided to recite Namo Amitabha Buddha piously, everything will be fine.
We will reap the benefits.
This is the benefits we will obtain in this Dharma Door.
In the Sutra of Immeasurable Lifespan, and the three Sutras on Pure Land, and the Pure Land teaching in the Shandao lineage, we are told of the benefits.
‘There are inconceivable merits and virtues in Amitabha recitation.
We will reap the immeasurable and limitless merits and virtues when we practise exclusively.
On the contrary, we will not obtain the immeasurable, limitless inconceivable merits and virtues.
If we mixed up our practice, our practice is impure.
With impurities, how can we reap the fruits?’
‘Without planting the cause, there is no fruits.
That is why we should have faith in Amitabha Buddha exclusively.
In our mind, we will have faith in Amitabha Buddha exclusively, thinking about Amitabha Buddha only.
With our mouth we recite Namo Amitabha Buddha exclusively.
That is why Great Master Shandao has said,
‘The World of Ultimate Bliss is the noumena Nirvana Realm.
It is difficult for those who cultivate half-heartedly, mixing with a variety of good acts to seek a rebirth.
That is why the Thus Come One has chosen the most wonderful Dharma for us.
He teaches us to recite Namo Amitabha Buddha exclusively, solely.’
These verses are written on the wall here in the temple.
One exclusiveness is not enough.
He stresses on the great strength and told us to cultivate solely.
This is the sincere advice to us.
We should only recite the Buddha’s Name.
Reciting Namo Amitabha Buddha exclusively enables us to reap such benefits, to attain a rebirth in the World of Ultimate Bliss, to be liberated from the transmigration of birth and death.
Besides the recitation of Amitabha Buddha exclusively, do we have to eat rice?
Must we sleep?
Of course, we must eat, sleep and work.
Similarly, we must be filial to our parents, make offerings and attend to our Masters and Elders, be kind to all living beings.
We must not kill living beings and partake their flesh.
We must be kind to others, forgive others.
On seeing others’ sufferings, we must try our best to help.
As Buddhists, all these good deeds in life should be practised.
Of course, these good deeds are not the factors for us to gain a rebirth in the World of Ultimate Bliss.
The cause of rebirth is reciting Namo Amitabha Buddha.
With the right cause of Amitabha recitation, we will attain a rebirth in the World of Ultimate Bliss.
That is why we are told to recite Namo Amitabha Buddha solely, exclusively.
Namo Amitabha Buddha Link: https://oridharma.wordpress.com/2022/05/31/amitabha-recitation-difficult-delivery-and-illnesses/

A story on Amitabha recitation told by Dharma Master Shi Hui Jing
Luo Ji Ying is staying in Ling Feng village, the city He Zhou in the Province of Guang Xi, in the mainland of China. She is an illiterate and she does not have any faith in religion.
Five years ago, in the year 2011 her two daughters began to learn the Buddha Dharma.
They told their mother to recite Namo Amitabha Buddha, as she is unable to read Sutras or sitting in meditation as she is quite old, with poor memory.
Most important of all, the recitation of Namo Amitabha Buddha reaps the most supreme merits and virtues.
It is a simple practice to leave transmigration on the six paths, to leave births and deaths, to accomplish Buddhahood swiftly.
That is why they encouraged their mother to recite Namo Amitabha Buddha and mother also believed in this.
She also becomes a volunteer in a nearby temple, Xiu Feng Temple.
In the year 2012 her second daughter was pregnant.
When it was time to deliver her baby at the hospital, she faced the problem of difficult delivery.
What could she do?
An experienced doctor told the family that if the baby was not born within thirty minutes he might die of suffocation.
And it was too late to go for Caesarean.
He said that the only way to save the baby was to deliver him immediately.
Her second daughter was thus thinking,
‘Now the doctor cannot save my child. The only person who can save him is me. I am the mother. But if I can save him, I would have delivered him earlier. Now only Amitabha Buddha can save him.’
She thought about this and decided to keep calm to call on Namo Amitabha Buddha.
While her mother and sister were sitting outside, reciting Namo Amitabha Buddha too.
After a while the baby was born.
Amitabha recitation enables us to deliver our child smoothly, to be freed from a difficult labour.
In Japan, a lady also faced the difficult labour.
But she did not recite Namo Amitabha Buddha.
She was thinking about Amitabha Buddha’s 18th Vow which is thus stated,
‘On my attainment of Buddhahood, living beings in the ten directions who have faith in me sincerely seek to attain a rebirth in my Land with a joyful mind. Even if they can only recite ten times but are unable to attain a rebirth, I will not certify to the Proper Enlightenment. Exceptions are those who have committed the five rebellious acts, who slandered the Proper Dharma.’
How did she explain this, ‘Even if they can only recite ten times but are unable to attain a rebirth, I will not certify to the Proper Enlightenment’?
She explained this way, ‘If Amitabha Buddha does not help me to deliver my child, Amitabha Buddha is not Amitabha Buddha’.
Later the child was smoothly delivered.
So, whatever that we do we should connect it to Namo Amitabha Buddha.
Even though we cannot solve the problem, it will still be solved.
Luo Ji Ying was so happy to have a grandchild.
After a month, the baby was infected with gastritis.
He was sent to hospital, having high fever.
The temperature fluctuated up and down.
The grandmother was very worried.
She felt that the life of her grandson was her life.
What could she do?
She was very worried.
When we have given up all hopes in doctors, in medicines, we will surely look for another way to save this one-month-old baby, who had become very weak.
Most people will go to ask for help from the spiritual medium, am I right?
This is a normal practice among people.
Finally, she managed to find an efficacious psychic medium who can draw the magic figures to rid people of their diseases, to eradicate disaster and calamities.
The medium asked for the date of birth of the baby.
She gave the medium the time of birth, with the date, month and year.
The medium started to count and said, ‘The baby’s mother had recited Sutras and Amitabha Buddha during her pregnancy.’
She answered, ‘Yes, she did recite Sutras and Namo Amitabha Buddha.’
The medium continued to say, ‘You are also an Amitabha reciter!’
‘How do you know that?’
The medium answered, ‘Above your head there is a very huge Buddha! I do not dare to give you any amulet or magic figures!’
‘Why?’
The medium explained, ‘This is the Greatest Buddha. How dare I draw the magic figure to rid the disease? Do not worry. You go back now and your grandson will be fine.’
So, Luo Ji Ying returned home with her mind full of doubts.
She was asking about her grandson.
She did not even mention her practice in Amitabha recitation.
She was sure she did not say anything concerning the Buddha!
How did the medium get to know about the huge Buddha on top of her head?
She was thinking, ‘I recite Namo Amitabha Buddha every day but I do not even know about the Buddha above my head. I cannot even see him. But she is a medium. Surely, she can see this.’
So, she went back and told her daughters about what the medium had sad.
Wah! The whole family started to recite Namo Amitabha Buddha piously.
Besides, they also carried the baby to Xiu Feng Temple to pray to the Buddha.
Not long after that the baby was well enough to return home.
Now he is about four years old.
She said, ‘This child is truly healthy, active, clever and cute. He seldom falls sick. Sometimes, he might fall sick. He will go by himself before the Buddha and make obeisance to the Buddha.’
What does it reveal in this story?
Luo Ji Ying who recites Namo Amitabha Buddha, with Amitabha Buddha standing above her head does not know much about the Pure Land practice.
Can she recite the Amitabha Sutra? The answer is ‘No’.
Besides, there is very little teaching on Amitabha recitation at her place.
That is why when her grandson fell sick, she would still look for help from a spiritual medium.
She does not know the greatest Buddha, the most magnificent Buddha, the Buddha with the mighty ability is standing above her head.
As long as she recites the Name of the Buddha who is standing above her, everything will be ok.
But she has no idea about this.
That is why she will still search around, practising the mixed conduct.
After listening to the medium only then they realize Amitabha Buddha is the most magnificent Buddha, the Buddha with the most merits and virtues.
Once we have decided to recite Namo Amitabha Buddha piously, everything will be fine.
We will reap the benefits.
This is the benefits we will obtain in this Dharma Door.
In the Sutra of Immeasurable Lifespan, and the three Sutras on Pure Land, and the Pure Land teaching in the Shandao lineage, we are told of the benefits.
‘There are inconceivable merits and virtues in Amitabha recitation.
We will reap the immeasurable and limitless merits and virtues when we practise exclusively.
On the contrary, we will not obtain the immeasurable, limitless inconceivable merits and virtues.
If we mixed up our practice, our practice is impure.
With impurities, how can we reap the fruits?’
‘Without planting the cause, there is no fruits.
That is why we should have faith in Amitabha Buddha exclusively.
In our mind, we will have faith in Amitabha Buddha exclusively, thinking about Amitabha Buddha only.
With our mouth we recite Namo Amitabha Buddha exclusively.
That is why Great Master Shandao has said,
‘The World of Ultimate Bliss is the noumena Nirvana Realm.
It is difficult for those who cultivate half-heartedly, mixing with a variety of good acts to seek a rebirth.
That is why the Thus Come One has chosen the most wonderful Dharma for us.
He teaches us to recite Namo Amitabha Buddha exclusively, solely.’
These verses are written on the wall here in the temple.
One exclusiveness is not enough.
He stresses on the great strength and told us to cultivate solely.
This is the sincere advice to us.
We should only recite the Buddha’s Name.
Reciting Namo Amitabha Buddha exclusively enables us to reap such benefits, to attain a rebirth in the World of Ultimate Bliss, to be liberated from the transmigration of birth and death.
Besides the recitation of Amitabha Buddha exclusively, do we have to eat rice?
Must we sleep?
Of course, we must eat, sleep and work.
Similarly, we must be filial to our parents, make offerings and attend to our Masters and Elders, be kind to all living beings.
We must not kill living beings and partake their flesh.
We must be kind to others, forgive others.
On seeing others’ sufferings, we must try our best to help.
As Buddhists, all these good deeds in life should be practised.
Of course, these good deeds are not the factors for us to gain a rebirth in the World of Ultimate Bliss.
The cause of rebirth is reciting Namo Amitabha Buddha.
With the right cause of Amitabha recitation, we will attain a rebirth in the World of Ultimate Bliss.
That is why we are told to recite Namo Amitabha Buddha solely, exclusively.
Namo Amitabha Buddha Link: https://oridharma.wordpress.com/2022/05/31/amitabha-recitation-difficult-delivery-and-illnesses/

So I exclusively breastfeed my 7mo old. She'll take a pumped bottle occasionally but only if we're traveling (rarely) or have a busy day (again, rarely), otherwise she's a booby baby.
I recently signed off to have a tube removal since she's my 2nd kid, I have a boy and girl, and I'm just not wanting to have anymore children. I'll have my tubes removed June 5th and I'll be under anesthesia for the 30min procedure.
I asked my doctor about if that would effect my milk and he says that I should pump and dump for the surgery day, and 3 days following!!! He said there's a chance that the medications could be present in my milk and pass to my baby. My sister had the same surgery 2 years prior after the birth of my nephew and there was no issue and she fed him immediately afterwards...
I'm worried because at most I have probably 4 feedings in the freezer and I'm not an over-supplier. I still feed every 2/3 hours and made enough for that and rarely ever more, but now I'm faced with possibly having to pump 4 days worth when I don't even have 1 days worth saved after 7 months!!!
My girl has never had formula, not that we'd even be able to afford it if she'd take it. We live in the southern US and we've seen $50+ cans of formula on our grocery store shelves... it's sad and scary to think that some babies and families don't have a choice...
All of this to ask, would it really effect the milk to the point that I would have to dump it for 4 days?? Does anyone have any similar stories with surgery and breastfeeding? Google hasn't given me much help in searching since I don't know the particular anesthesia they'll use until the day of.

Blood tests appear fine, but I can't get my guardians to set me up with a primary care provider. Symptoms include constant chills to the point of not being able to walk, constant stomach pain, dropping and breaking things almost 24/7, and tripping to the point where I can barely get up out of bed and walk without being in pain from muscle weakness anymore. I take sleeping meds along with anxiety pills, but I don't know if they're enough anymore. . . . . . . . . . . . .
I've had labels thrown at me ranging from bipolar like my mother from a licensed psychologist to a schizophrenic who thinks they have ghosts in their bones by EMTs. They constantly ask how much caffeine I drink even though I only drink one cup a day (ranges in size). I would switch over to decaf in a heartbeat, but it's no longer sold on store shelves where I live and I'm stuck with what's available. I've tried to cut back on soda/kool-aid/etc. and mostly drink cold water from their dispenser to save money. I usually go for a sprite when I'm out at a restaurant. All my blood tests come back fine aside from Vitamin D and my stool looks completely normal. I do have the rounded gels for vitamin D, but I forget to take them.
I left my phone at therapy on accident so using this time to see if I can make sense of the outside world, but all it really does so far is prove the point of why I'm addicted to my phone in the first place. While everyone else aimlessly scrolls through TikTok, browsing actual social media like Twitter and Reddit is the only way to connect with the outside world in a small rural town with next to nothing but a trashed up Dollar General. I feel hopeless when it comes to everyday civil rights issues taking place around the world while I'm stuck with old boomers who pray for our demise.
It's not safe to get an apartment where I live because of all the drugged up deadbeats banging on people's windows and helping themselves to everyone else's spaces while the cops do nothing. I've also had all kinds of people come up to me and fantasize about wanting to kill my pets in front of me, so that's another thing I have to worry about as well. There's even been issues with people pulling out knives on each other, so even though I've bought pepper spray for myself I dont think it's enough to protect my entire living space from being pillaged. It might injure my pet if the perpetrator decides to aim for my pet first and I can't spray them in time.
Steel padlocks don't mean jack fucking shit when people can pick up a screwdriver from somewhere and unscrew the hinges off the door while I'm gone just like my sister's kids did to me growing up. Security cameras don't mean much either if all the meth heads are just gonna come back and rip through all the replacements without any consequences from the police whatsoever. Not only is it unsanitary and unsafe, but I wouldn't be able to find clothes that fit me without traveling out of state either. I would like to start walking again, but I'm scared of falling in the middle of a busy highway or tumbling into a ditch somewhere. Even then it wouldn't matter how much weight I lose due to cup size being controlled by horomones. The only reason I'm so concerned about my heart is because my mother's side of the family has heart issues really bad.
I do go to group therapy (CBT), but they've practically given up on the "mental health" aspect because it triggers all the other clients into not wanting to come anymore, with some being in even worse conditions than I am (CSA, domestic violence, etc). Whenever we try to provide reasonable explainations on how coping mechanisms can trigger volatile reactions out of other family members, we're constantly being invalidated and told that we're just choosing to be miserable. Everyone is always a stuck up about how family is so important and how we need to "love" them from a distance. However, I can't just go anywhere else for therapy because the only other psychologists they have for miles (ones at the facility) will literally raise their voice and scream at residents in front of everyone else if they don't get their way. I can't go to the other group therapy that the residents because some of them reek so bad to the point of giving me flashbacks of my parents' roach infested hoards.
Everyone gets onto my ass about leaving things on the table when I go use the restroom, but the truth is that I'm already tired of having my all shit stolen since I was 10 while everyone in my life sat around and told me to quit crying and bitching about everything. I do try to watch other residents and keep my personal items within arms reach, but I can't keep up when I can barely exit my bed and walk down the fucking halls just to eat. That's all on top of my parents consisting of three different hoarders and losing track of everything I bring over there (not to mention all the roaches, mice, and animal waste all over the floor).
I've gotten a lot more freedom since moving away from the cult, but everything I did to cope has practically gone out the fucking window due to thieves and lack of internet (they won't fix the damn router bc they dont know anything about tech). I used to have a Bluey box full of different characters from the show (ordered online ofc), but everything's so filthy that I can't really bring anything out besides toys or stuffed animals. I have an entire tote of books I've never even touched because the place is way too nasty to have them out and risk them getting ruined.
Whenever my belongings do go missing, I'm told to just suck it up and forget about it. I'm scared to fucking death end up with holes in them from being burnt or get mixed up with other women's clothes and get caught being worn them when they supposedly "know better" according to staff. I had a female resident at the religious group home scream and cry to the point that my entire fucking body weight against the damn door wasn't enough to stop her from barging into my bedroom and harass me for shit (that's after all the BS with my sister's kids for over a decade), so I'm not even gonna try to talk to anyone directly anymore.
If I told anyone in my family about my concerns, they would just get pissed and ramble on about how it's my choice to be there, how I need to stop bitching about everything not going my way, and that I should've just stayed at the religious group home. Therapists keep acting like it's all my fault in regards to my emotions, that I just need to work on myself and tell me there's nothing else they can do. Nothing fucking matters when everything on my broken ass tablet requires internet and my consoles are broken. Hell, I'd be having a blast with my 2DS XL if the thing didn't fall apart within the first month. All I really wanted it for was to emulate old PC games and hook it up to the TV. I figured that if I had all my games on one device with the bare minimum accessories needed to make it function, I wouldn't have to feel like a damn hoarder anymore.
I love the tiny library of games I have on my Wii, but my remote is absolutely dirty as fuck with roach poop and other crud. There's no way to clean it without literally soaking it in something. The console itself has all kinds of encrusted gunk on the side from where my hoarder father attached velcro to the side of it. Constant chills makes it practically impossible to sit up and play the games as well (I'm lucky just to be able to stand up anymore). My library is small enough that I'm willing to fuck around with gyroscopic controls for fun. It's not even the biggest priority to me anyway because there would be so many other games to play in the mean time.
I figured with the Steamdeck I could could prop it up against the bed or set it on a table use a controller with it if I reach a point to where I can't see the TV screen from my bed. I can't apply for a job at Walmart to pay for the thing myself because of my balance issues causing me to fall and the inability to grip anything (which would result in massive damages to inventory). I'm also worried about them taking all my earnings since my SSI check isn't enough to cover rent and I need state supplement. I thought about selling my art on Redbubble and save up that way, but my 2022 Samsung tablet that I got a few months ago glitches out when I try to draw stuff and crashes whenever I try to play certain games.
I can honestly forget about recieving one for Christmas/birthdays because for whatever reason, everyone has to have their way when it comes to gift giving and god fucking forbid you try to establish the most basic of boundaries or else you're nothing a spoiled bitch. It's one thing for the Steamdeck to be out of budget, and it's another to deliberately go against a person's wishes when it comes to simple shit like candy or soda when they obviously fucking know better. It doesn't help that everyone goes apeshit over the concept of making a "wishlist" like their life depends on it, only to hand me a sack full of random shit from the Dollar Tree and call it a day. It's also impossible to give it all away when nobody else wants it (I don't have transportation to Goodwill) and throwing away new items is a trigger for me.
I know the Steamdeck wouldn't really fix anything outside of the clutter issue and I probably shouldnt be getting one with my current impairments, but it would provide me with something to do outside of being on social media 24/7. Given the total squalor I grew up in as a child, I'd be genuinely happy with a lot of things outside of the Steamdeck if it weren't for my living situation literally preventing me from doing so:
_ toys
_ art
_ exercise bike
_ walking outside

• playing games on the 2DS again

All of these "coping" mechanisms would come back to me if I were able to move to a different area in my own setting where I don't have to constantly worry about pest infestations from the neighbors, getting evicted for no reason, and random strangers trying to kill me or my pets. I've looked everywhere for supported independence programs and absolutely all of them require a medical waiver with a waiting list of up to 10 years. I absolutely need these services for my own safety as a neglected autistic person to ensure that people aren't just gonna come out of the woodworks and try to assault me on my own property. If I move to a more stable area, I could finally get a decent job without having to worry about coworkers coming up to me and taking shit out of my hands for not knowing any better. I could finally have stuff to do outside of technology and be comfortable with my own surroundings.
Even if all of this is just anxiety, I'm still fucked over when in it comes to actual health issues like gingivitis (as confirmed by Aspen Dental) and getting my wisdom teeth removed due to the lack of a primary care physician. I've done everything I can to and they just won't do anything to get me in to see a doctor. I try to brush my teeth when I can but hurts too much to do so. I also feel overwhelmed with trying to organize everything as I keep getting way more brushes than I possibly need and people will not take no for an answer. I don't even know how to prepare for death anymore as I don't even have loved ones. The only people I've ever been given true contact with are my hoarder parents and mentally unstable sister and that's it; no friends or anything.
There's nothing I can really do to repeal the guardianship without taking everyone to court, which is impossible with my sister's busy schedule and unwillingness to work with anybody else. I only because it gives me something to do finally outside of being locked up all week until I go to a half-assed therapy session for three hours. However, they usually go straight home and aren't really willing to go anywhere that costs money aside from restaurants since we have next to no food at the house (even then it becomes unsafe to eat due to all the roaches and mice).
The bane of her existence is to scream about how much of a lazy ass I am despite turning my parents basement into a hoarded up shithole that's flooded out with animal waste to the point of attracting mice. I know her issues aren't my problem, but back in the day she'd come up behind me and pinch my sides to aggrivate me. She also threw pants/shoes/etc. at me while I was on the bed and even shoved me out of the way after accusing me of hiding something I wasn't supposed to have in the kitchen drawer (I was a legal adult at the time). I usually lay flat in bed to avoid confrontation, but ignoring her makes her volatile so I'm screwed either way. I'm pretty sure she's beating and starving her dogs as well, but nobody really gives a fuck. I've got too many of my own issues to even try worrying about them. She's known to be a neurotin junkie for years since moving in with my parents and was even caught smuggling Adderall at work while the cops didn't give a fuck and turned her loose the next day.
I would've called the cops only if there was another child still in the house, but can't do so otherwise because of the risk of charges being brought against me for slander and libel (APS labeled the case as unsubstantiated). I can't just go around risking all my freedom and housing over sick animals that would more than likely be euthanized anyway. Not that animal control would do anything to begin with, of course. I know it feels redundant to even go over there every weekend in those conditions, but I'm tired of being cooped up all day. I'm tired of not having access to a PC with internet and not being able to breathe due to all the secondhand smoke.
I have finally have regular access to food and meds at the facility, but I'm bored with nothing that makes me feel comfortable anymore. I used to walk around town because of my issues with knocking stuff off tables, bumping into everything, and tripping all the time. I used to play games on my tablet to get through the day, but the internet no longer works since switching it over to a new name and the staffare too lazy to just reset the router (everything is infested with ads). We do have bingo during the week, but most people only play for cigarettes and that's it. I can't hold any kind of conversation with anyone else because they'll just ramble on and on about random shit that happened thirty years ago. I used to play Fortnite and Warframe on my Switch Lite, but it broke after I dropped it and we don't have repair shops where I live. It would only hold charge from 45 minutes to an hour with half the games being broken anyway, so I don't even know if it's even worth saving at this point.
I can barely make use of group therapy (CBT) because of how cold I am and how much my stomach hurts. I try to sit outside when I'm not cold as there's nothing to really do around town anyway, but it's nothing more than cigarette butts and spit everywhere (along with rotten food that attracts flies). There's nothing the staff can really do to make the residents pick up after themselves and they can't ban smoking (even if other residents have health issues) because it's the only reason why anyone gets out of bed. The people where I live don't really believe in PTSD outside of veterans, let alone C-PTSD. The mere concept of it would go against everyone's idea that "family is everything, even if they do things we don't like". We barely have mental health services as it is so I'm basically screwed into staying where I'm at even though I live in fear of being punished. I'll see what I can do to get the medicine lady to up the hydroxozine a bit, but I don't know what else there is to even do beyond that point aside from huddling in bed and freezing 24/7 for the next decade until I'm approved for the waiver.

I’m an eldest daughter from a mixed cultural background for context so… yeah.
I swear to god the second I was born my parents wanted me to be a surgeon or a doctor. I was bought science books, science themed everything as gifts etc etc. Basically forced to be a geek before I even reached school age (nothing wrong with geeks at all I still am one now hehe.) I was also forced to play violin and do classical singing and they’d constantly tell me when I reached 18 I need to join the cities symphony orchestra. So a doctor and a classical maestro….. right…
I actually had an interest in disease from a youngish age so I did eventually want to go to medical school or do a stem degree so that kept them happy but every week somewhere in convo me becoming a doctor would be brought up. My mum would also constantly make me perform music for her friends which embarrassed tf out of me.
So awesome! Parents who wanna see their kids succeed right? So what did they do to help me go to medical school?
Tutoring? No. Too expensive even when I requested extra help for maths (my weakness) my mum told me I am not getting it because I have shitty focus and it’s a waste of money.
Good grades? I got those. When I didn’t I was beaten or not allowed to eat dinner. Nevermind they never took interest in any of my schoolwork. I was expected to just do well regardlesss. My GC sister would get 20 bucks for every grade she got over a C+.
A home environment conducive for studying? With all the yelling and constant drinking and physical violence my home life was very hard to Be in. But I wasn’t allowed outside on school nights so going to a library or my friend’s house was out of the question. I really struggled to focus when my mum would burst into my room every night to yell at me for leaving a cup in the sink.
Volunteering? My parents made it known they thought I was irresponsible and stupid(??) and would never take me to anything I wanted to participate in for college credit. I didn’t even bother asking after the first few times. I’d taken interest in going on a trip to Africa to shadow a midwife for a couple weeks using money I’d saved from my cashier job and my aunt and thought this was a wonderful opportunity. My racist ass mum wouldn’t let me go because she didn’t want African men “giving me aids” which I just… I feel nauseous even typing that. I was 15.
Mental health support? A psych told my parents it was highly likely I had inattentive ADHD when I was young and instead of seeking further help which I’m sure would have been beneficial my mum decided from her expert peer reviewed research of speaking to her MLM sales friend that my behaviour of sometimes submitting homework late and dawdling in the shower was because of my diet and suddenly lactose and sugar were banned and I had to have these shake things every morning. It did nothing btw. My dad also told me he didn’t believe in that stuff and I was just not exercising enough… yeah because I wasn’t allowed to leave the house lmao.
During my exams years (11&12) my parents went through an incredibly messy divorce which obviously was hard. My dad was given custody because my mum made like 0 money and because of his work schedule and hobbies I had to feed, drive and do chores for my younger sister who really took the divorce hard. She slept in my room most nights. Despite this I somehow managed to keep my grades decent enough to where I was invited to interview for a pre-medical program in another state. My parents wouldn’t pay for flights so I couldn’t go. I applied for a biomedical science degree in my state and got accepted and decided to go there instead. The minute I got the acceptance letter my parents were pressuring me to move out (16) and so I did. No help in any way shape or form I moved 4 hours away. For years they constantly shamed me and called me lazy whenever I brought up my studies because it wasn’t medicine. I said it Wasn’t too late to attend medical school it was just far too expensive for me to pay for (we don’t do loans in my country) and they just shrugged.
I haven’t talked to them in nearly a decade and this still grinds me. How the hell did they expect me to get into medical school and go with no money and no support of any kind (emotional, physical etc.) and then shame me for not going.
Nothing I ever achieved was good enough. My classical music got me many awards and they would still put immense pressure to the point where as soon as I could I quit. I got diagnosed with ADHD last year and have since been medicated and man.. the difference in my focus is night and day. I feel it’s important to note neither of my parents even finished high school lol.
DAE experience the pressure to be a prodigy with no parental guidance?

Greetings, fellow obstruct-atrinos,
For a decade I've been basically collapsing with exhaustion when I get home after work. Today, I didn't have do that. I can't tell you how amazing it feels to... Just be able to make some dinner without feeling like microwaved dogshit at the same time.
Here's the part that I didn't expect: I didn't feel a lot better upon waking. I was very slightly less frantic, but I didn't spring out of bed and sing with the bluebirds as some people describe their first night of successful CPAP therapy. However, as the day progressed, I realized that I didn't need barrels of coffee and I didn't fade in the afternoon.
I'm not going to pretend that this adjustment was easy. It was, and I select this description intentionally, a fucking hassle beyond time and space. Here are a few things that made it happen for me:

1. Get a tube hose cover. The tube is awful because it gets in the way, it's noisy when it moves, and it's uncomfortable when it touches you. Plus it just feels wrong; beds are supposed to be soft and comforting, not filled with bulky plastic that looks like set dressing from Alien. A hose cover improves all of these issues.
2. If you hate your machine, as I did (I despised that thing with the pulverizing intensity of the oceans' merciless depths), take a few weeks off. After failing therapy for about a month, I put away my machine, and really focused on sleep hygiene (I even took a Coursera course on sleep medicine). As a result, I drink a lot less, exercise more regularly, and act as a better caretaker for my human pet. I wouldn't have been able to succeed if I hadn't improved my sleep hygiene.
3. It's OK to get motivation wherever you can find it. Do it for your partner, for your kids, to show that you can overcome this hemorrhoid of a condition, to be the person that you know you could be if you could... Just... Feel... Rested. Be gentle on yourself, but don't let this thing win.