Friend copy and paste symbols pictures

I just finished my second year of college. For most of my life I’ve been hit / threatened with violence over small things, demoralized, made to ruin important (to me) relationships for their stupid reasons, my location and the people I hung out with were constantly interrogated and controlled, and just verbally degraded to the point where when I eventually showed one of my friends what they said to me they were genuinely horrified and that’s when i realized that it wasn’t just normal “tough love.” My nparent was never wrong, would pretend to be open to criticism and accountability but demean me and call me a sophomoric fool if I tried to bring things up (I should’ve known it wouldn’t work anyway).
I decided not to go back home this past weekend, informed my parents w a long text about why. They immediately apologized for most of the things and said that it was their fault that I felt this way, but everything they said were things they didn’t mean (not sure if this is true, they seemed to have meant it pretty well in the moment). In the first few hours after I sent the text (and after their initial apology text), they told my sibling to call me and make sure I wasn’t doing anything drastic, and told them that they fucked up but I was making bad decision bc my brain isn’t fully developed.
But over the past few days they have continued to text long apologizes saying they are sorry and they hope I will forgive them, they realize how much they fucked up, please don’t cut them off, etc. They are also apparently treating my siblings better now.
They seem more genuine than anything I’ve heard before, and they’ve never apologized before so I guess that’s a step that’s different. However in the past they have told me that sometimes they say things to me in the moment bc they know that’s what I need to hear but they actually think I’m being stupid. And even if they are being genuine, it almost annoys me that they think that 10+ years of this shit can be solved with a few apology texts. I also think that if I had spoken the content of my message to them in person without threatening to go LC/NC they wouldn’t have responded nearly as apologetically and probably would have rationalized it and made me feel stupid as always.
But I’m not sure if I’m being too callous - please if anyone has any experience with this I would really appreciate advice. I’m just afraid if I go back to them things might change for a little bit and they’d just find more subtle ways to emotionally undermine me.

(I understand this is a bit of a read so I included a tl:dr at the bottom)
This may end up becoming a wall of text so I apologize in advance. I'm not sure how to properly start this so I'll just jump into it. I've been living with my best friends for the past 8 years. The 4 of us moved in together in early 2016 after deciding it would be beneficial financially and because we all get along so damn well that we knew there wouldn't be any issues living under the same roof. Fast forward to today and although 2 them have moved out, I'm still living here with my one buddy and his girlfriend. Things are still great there, no signs of friendship deterioration, tolerance or anything that might cause friction between us. However, I've been witness to a few things as well as started experiencing health issues that have completely changed the outlook I had on life back when we moved in together nearly a decade ago.
A little over 3 years ago I began dealing with awful IBS issues that to this day are still not properly being treated as doctors can't figure out what's wrong with my gut. Over the past 4 months I have begun dealing with nearly debilitating anxiety that has left me pretty much unable to leave the house except for doctor's appointments or the extremely occasional outing to a family or friend's house where I'm only able to stay for about an hour before having to leave. I do see a psychologist as well as a psychiatrist and I am on medication for both the IBS and anxiety, which helps but is in no way a cure. Due to these issues, I have become a shell of the person I used to be. No longer do I wake up and just decide to take a drive to the Jersey shore, a trip to Six Flags or head into the city to catch a Phillies game. Instead, I sit in the house and play video games or watch youtube as doing almost anything else is sure to set my anxiety or IBS off which may or may not land me in the ER.
My buddy that I still live with has been through absolute hell the past few years but luckily he's the kind of person who can just raw dog life (as in, he doesn't deal with any physical or mental issues, rarely gets sick and has no trouble going anywhere, doing anything, can eat whatever he wants without issues, etc.). He lost his mom to cancer last year. She passed exactly one week after Mother's Day. She lived here with us for about the final year of her life. Me and him have been friends for a good 20+ years at this point so his mom was like a mother to me as well, especially being as I don't have a proper relationship with my own mother. Watching her suffer through years of cancer only to pass away at 54 years old was heartbreaking. At least she's finally at peace now, of course. Now, his dad is also going through cancer treatment which is a recurrence of cancer that was found years ago, which automatically makes it stage 4. His prognosis is not grim but to many of us, his dad just seems done with it all. He stays here with us on weekends and with his sister during the week. We can see how much of a toll it's all taking on him. He won't admit it but we know that he doesn't want to put his son through all of this again after losing his mom just last year. If he was given a choice to "go" right now, he would take it, 100% to alleviate any more potential suffering at his or anyone else's behalf. His (my friend's) girlfriend also deals with chronic health issues both physical and mental which has helped open his eyes to the things that other people (who can't just raw dog life) go through on a daily basis. She lost her father when she was in her early 20s so it's helpful to him that she understands what losing a parent feels like.
Watching all of this happen just makes me realize how little our health care industry and government actually seem to care about our true wishes regarding life and death. Why did his mom have to suffer all those years with a terminal diagnosis? Why does his dad have to suffer now? Just because they're both in their 50s and not elderly it seems like care is always about treatment and not giving them the option to leave this life with their dignity intact. I myself would choose to leave this world if the door was opened for me. That does not mean that I am currently having thoughts of killing myself. It means that if the option was presented to me, to go out on my own terms, I would take it. Suicide is still extremely taboo in our society for some reason. Religion and government would have you think it is a crime against humanity but what is more humane than letting someone decide on their own terms that they're ready to move on? We are given this broad illusion of choice as children that we will get to grow up to be who we want to be and if we just try hard enough, we can accomplish anything. But for the vast majority of us, that is just not true. It is an illusion. We work and work and work just to barely earn enough money to survive and many end up in unhappy marriages solely because that's what society made them think they had to do as an adult.
Watching someone you love like family suffer and die will change you. Developing health issues that flip you from being someone outgoing, spontaneous. hard working and passionate into the complete opposite of those things will change you. Discovering that our healthcare system and government will do everything it possibly can to keep you as a "functioning member of society" no matter whether you're going through cancer treatment or dealing with chronic health issues will change you.
I'm 37 years old and I've never felt older in my life than I do right now. It's been almost 3 months that I've been on FMLA from work for the second time in 3 years. I'm wearing a heart monitor because my cardiologist wants to rule out any issues as my heart racing/palpitations are most likely just due to anxiety. Medication doesn't feel like it's doing much of anything and I'm watching the people around me grow older and deal with new problems every day. Yet our society says that we must keep going, no matter if you're suffering because the gears must keep turning. If we truly have the choice to do whatever we want to do in life, why aren't we allowed the choice to leave when we are ready? Why is it taboo? People kill themselves in horrific fashion every single day, more than once every *minute* worldwide. They want a way to fix that and the solution is right there in front of them. Give people the option to leave on their own terms. I've had plenty of conversations about this with friends and family and almost every single one of us would choose to leave on our own terms, when we are ready if the option were available. Hell, even my psychologist agrees with me on this. There's always a big debate about the ethics of it all but until you witness firsthand someone suffering and dying or begin dealing with your own health issues there really isn't any way to understand it. The vast majority of people are out there just raw dogging life and thoughts like these never cross their mind even once. But once it's brought up to them, they understand and accept it, at least in my own personal experiences from talking with friends and family. Ethics, health, religion, government, society, all of these things play a role in determining our fate. I just hope that someday a program is put in place so that people no longer have to suffer.
Finishing up, I understand that my condition is nowhere near as bad as what many others may be dealing with. Some people will look at me with disdain for wanting to walk through the door at only 37 years old while others will understand exactly where I'm coming from and feel the same. Everyone is entitled to their beliefs. I am appreciative of the healthcare system while also criticizing its flaws. I'm glad that religion provides so many with the means to live a happy and healthy life while also believing that many views (and laws) put forth by religious folk are vile and extremely outdated. I am glad that there are systems in place to help people in their darkest hours while also understanding completely why so many choose to leave. At 37 I still have plenty of my life left ahead of me, even if I don't want to get old. I still have things to look forward to such as video game releases or a new series to watch that keep me going. But I also acknowledge that there is a part of me that is ready to go. I have seen what life has to offer. I have lived with my family, on my own, while in a relationship and with my best friends. I do not want to get married or have kids. I do not want to work until I'm 65 (retirement age is likely to rise during my lifetime anyway). I do not want to get old and become a burden on anyone, either family/friends, healthcare workers or the average citizens who would have to pay for my social security.
Lose the illusion of choice and give people the option to go when they are ready.
If you managed to read through all of that, I just want to say thanks! Life is a beautiful thing and I am incredibly thankful for all of the amazing people I've met over the years and for the things that I've been able to do and see. This is not a post about wanting to commit suicide, it's main focus should be that we are forced into this world against our will and given the illusion of choice but when it comes down to it, we really don't have that much choice in how we live our lives and especially not when it comes to wanting it to end. Life can be incredibly fragile and many of us took that for granted until health issues decided it was time to show their ugly faces. I truly do not believe that feeling like you are ready to go should be considered taboo in any way. It should be something that everyone is provided a safe and comfortable space to discuss, whether with loved ones or medical professionals. For all of you out there just raw dogging life, I see you and I hope that someday I can get back to that, I really do miss being able to do whatever I wanted without a second thought. And of course, for anyone who knows what it feels like to be ready to go, to feel confident and comfortable with that decision, I see you as well and hope that the rest of society someday sees that as normal.
tl:dr I am 37 years old and over the past half decade I've watched family and people who were like family to me suffer and die from cancer or other health-related issues. I also deal with debilitating anxiety and IBS issues which obviously are nowhere near the level of something like cancer. However, I've discovered I have a feeling of "being ready to go" and I believe that people should be able to choose to leave this life with dignity and on their own terms without having to do something horrific. The healthcare industry, religious beliefs or government should not force us to remain here against our own free will just so we can keeps the gears of society turning. Let people leave on their own terms when they know that they are ready and get rid of the stigma surrounding talking about death.

I have been living outside India (in the US) for the past ten years now and look forward to going back home every year for vacation. Every year, my return is plagued with the same drama surrounding my NRE/NRO bank account in multiple banks. Nobody realizes how difficult it is for NRIs to maintain a bank account within the country. Most work needs to be done in person, in the home branch where your account is located. The banking mobile apps for each bank are sub par at best, especially when I compare them to the apps in the US. getting a debit or credit card takes weeks instead of just 1-2 business days. With the arrival of UPI, it’s become even more difficult to have any kind of autonomy in making simple payments. Most transactions can be done very easily with a local bank account. However, NRIs by law aren’t supposed to have local bank accounts - just NRE or NRO accounts. UPI doesn’t work for NRE accounts. Many NRE/NRO accounts are registered to foreign mobile numbers too which don’t allow for UPI transactions. We have read news on UPI enabled for certain foreign countries (US) included, however it’s not really true and most bank officials tell us we cannot enable it for a foreign number. The UPI framework is great for citizens living within the country. However for citizens living abroad, it isn’t inclusive in any way. Moreover, even tourists from other countries have issues with paying for basic things here because everyone uses UPI and nobody really has POS systems in their stores anymore, unless it’s a global brand. But why would I want to shop at a global brand when I can shop local especially as a tourist? Recently, I wanted to buy medicines at a pharmacy and I spent hours trying to find change as they didn’t have a POS system to use my local credit/debit card and I didn’t have UPI enabled because of my NRE bank account . Inclusivity isn’t really one of the pillars of this new infrastructure and that really hurts especially when you look forward to your trips back home to meet family and friends. And let’s not forget about the taxes we file without fail every year.

I had written a review on andy erkis about a month ago. It was very long and heartfelt and explained how his services affected me later in my life.
Today I went to check on my review and realized it was also pulled down just like my second nature review. I called andy's office and told them that they should not have pulled my review down. They lied and said some member of the public did it. Then I went on to tell the receptionist about how andy ruined my life and about how I was molested at second nature and beaten at wediko. He asked if I wanted to talk to andy and I said no. I'm not in the mood to be gaslit today. Just wanted to get that out there.
I'm going to post the review below that was deleted. I hope somebody else out there can copy and paste it into his review section.

I sent usdt to my coinbase wallet, using the matic network, i didnt know coinbase didnt support usdt matic network transactions (But yet they allow people to deposit it?)
And now i cant convert or withdraw it because "coinbase doesnt support it"
I ended up finding out hundreds of people got screwed from this also.
Is there any way i can retrieve the usdt? It's just sitting in the "web 3" wallet on my coinbase account.
Coinbase support has been useless, spoke to 6 different employees, and they all just kept copy/pasting the same paragraphs regardless of what i said.

In the past, I was advised to contact a childhood friend and tried to follow the advice yet had no success. I’ve tried to monitor it and I’ve tried consistently yet nothings occurred.
I feel guilty for posting here because I’ve seen a lot of people here be able to contact their headmates and so on yet I’m unable to do so. I know there’s probably a few systems who can’t but I’ve seen so many people state that you should be able to contact them (no on here said that, I’ve just seen it on media in general).
At this rate, I’m starting to believe that I just dissociate and blank out, nothing more. It’s driving me crazy that I can’t find an answer nor gain the professional help me find that answer. I feel like I’m faking or just going through delusions and nothing more.
My thoughts and emotions may feel different at times yet that could be mood swings. I know prior posts state and help prove that I’m most likely plural yet I can’t bring myself to believe it.
Apologies for the constant posting. I’m so lost on what to do.

I have a condition called exotropic strabismus, so basically my eyes aren't straight. It's something I've had since I was a child. I'm very clear about it on my dating profile as it's pretty obvious. Yesterday after work I went for a coffee date (I always do this before a "proper" first date to take the pressure off) with a guy I matched with. I thought we had a great time, he was really nice, easy conversation, lots of laughs, but this morning he messaged me to say that although he thought I was pretty and nice, blah blah blah, he just can't get past "my wonky eye" and he doesn't see us going anywhere.
This is the third time this has happened in the past few months and I wanted to get it off my chest as I'm feeling a mix of self pity and anger. It's very clear from my pictures what I look like and I've always been upfront about it. But every time this happens they always say something along the lines of "I thought I could ignore it / overlook it" or whatever. It's so frustrating and disheartening. I get that he was being honest and upfront, and that's fine, I appreciate that, as it saves either of us wasting our time. But why match with me in the first place if it's going to bother you? I don't get it.

As title suggests, my girlfriend (21F) was invited by her male friend (21M) to go freediving/beach. Her male friends might bring more friends (non mutual friends), but this is not a guarantee - it is possible that it’d just be her and her male friend on the trip.
My girlfriend is currently in her first year of medical school and has been having trouble making friends, according to herself (she only has a few friends). She only recently met this male friend of hers.
My girlfriend has cheated on me in the past (back in high school, and for context, we’ve been together for 6 years). I still do trust her and want to place my trust in her. However, i do not trust her male friend as i know little about him and i know how creepy other men could be.
I have no intentions of stopping my girlfriend from going on the said trip since i understand that it’d be good for her to make more friends. Nevertheless, that doesn’t discount the fact that I feel sort of uneasy about this whole thing. I have no plans of talking to her about this though since i’m still not sure what to feel and it might inconvenience her.
Is feeling uneasy normal in this situation, or am I just overthinking? Should I be concerned about this at all? I’d appreciate any advice yall could give me.
TLDR: GF is going freediving with her M friend. M friend says he’s inviting other people but not guaranteed so it might just be the two of them on the trip. I have been feeling uneasy about this, though not to an extent that I’d freak out and call her out for it.

Hey y’all,
I have a Kenwood KAC-9102D pushing a JL12w3v2. Over the past week, I had one instance where the subwoofer completely dipped. I went to my amp with my multimeter on DC and only found 4 volts between power and ground. After lots of fiddling around, it eventually just started working again so I left it at that.
Fast forward to last night. It completely dipped again so I go to check the amp again. This time the power light isn’t even on and the current is less than 1 volt. No blown fuses, I even disconnected the power line and checked current between it and the power tap on the amp and it was a full 12 volts, same from the power line to ground. As soon as I reconnected it, it dipped to barely anything again. There is a full 12 volts from remote to ground. I’m thinking either the amp is stuck in protect mode or a solder joint or two came loose. This is an old amp and I am not the original owner of it, this was part of a bundle of hand-me-down gear I got from a friend of mine. I would love to hear input from the community before I jump the gun on a new amp purchase.
Thanks in advance.
P.S. If anyone also has input on why my old KAC-PS300T always blows the power line fuse as soon as it gets remote signal, that would be nice. That sucker hit hard for my front stage.

My cat was fine, happy, eating, energetic, and all-around normal on Saturday. On Sunday, he was sleeping more than usual and not eating. We took him to the vet Monday morning, and they said it was just a lung infection, and gave him some meds to put in his food... which he still wasn't eating, even if we tried to force feed to him. In the evening, he peed himself and started breathing weird and drooling. We rushed him to the vet, where they took him overnight. This morning, Tuesday, they said he has an enlarged heart and may not make it. According to looking online, even if he survives hospitalization, he'll die soon anyways.
I was going to take him to college with me, live my next 10+ years with him. He's my best friend, and probably the only reason I've survived the past of couple years. I'm just confused and don't know how to process anything. He's always been a perfectly healthy indoor cat with no issues, even a couple weeks ago when he had his first checkup with us.
Is there a chance he'll recover fully from this? This is the worst time possible, as I'm about to graduate and live thousands of miles from anybody I'm close to, and he was gonna be with me. Any consoling or hopeful information anybody can give would be greatly appreciated. I don't know for sure if he has DCM or HCM, or if it's diet-related, though he is just fed commercial food, so unfortunately I don't think it's that simple of an issue. I'm just sitting here depressed awaiting and hoping he's fine.

We are dating since february and we are in a LDR (2 hours of train from one another), i am more flexible than her to meet her since i work remotely 4 out of 5 days a week and she is studying. I understand her fears that are also a combination of commitment and distance, so i tried to give her a lot of space and to show her that distance wasn't a problem for me and solutions were plenty. 3 weeks ago we had a crisys since we booked a 5 days trip consisting in me visiting her at her place with her room mates and their friends. she dropped last minute all the plan and we went no talk for a week. I was really pissed at her for her lack of communication in telling me this thing, i knew that it could be moving the relationship further and i knew that maybe it wasn't that much of a deal visiting her while the house was full of people (all the room mates invited their friends so the house was overcrowded). but she just panicked and didn't have the courage to talk to me about this just messaging... after 1 week she texted me that she would come back to our hometown two weeks from this message for the weekend and that she would've like to see me if i did want to. i accepted and we started talking again with ease, and now and then she kept on being a little bit cold, but she called me since she knew i was angry about this lack of communication tool. in the call she told me she was just afraid of the distance and the commitment, i opened my heart to her and told her what i see in her and in which direction i want to move this "unofficial" relationship; she was shy and silent so i told her to not worry and that we already have an occasion to talk about it. Fast forward to the last weekend we met eachother and we were kind of playing in a limbo, kissing then pushing away then whatever. So i took the ball and talked to her and after she repeated to me that she wasn't sure and she was afraid i told her that it was over. She started crying like crazy for an hour, then she told me that she is stupid and fearful but she likes me very very much and wants to continue. I told her that we can continue but we have to communicate better and be sincere and so and so, and she promised that she would always call me if she was in panick or fearful and treat me more respectfully, but nontheless she still has a little bit of fears. Her past 2 relationship didn't end up good and she still a little bit hurt about them even tho more than 2 years passed from the last one. Now, i understand her fears but my mind is a bit messed up... are those fears something true, should i give her the time for her to come to me more than me to her? are these thing something resolvable or she just doesn't like me enough... i'm confused. I also gave her a ticket after we discussed and she cried, which was a present that was supposed to be hers for when i had to pay visit, she said yes but she is slowly moving to booking the trains... i kind of see those fears. To me her coming to the concert would be a big sign of caring about me. But i know it's also a little big complicated for her since she has to take a train just to come for the concert (2 hours) and then she has to visit a friend of her for his graduation party the next day in a city 4 hours from the one where the concert is.
TL;DR! she is afraid of commitment and distance, but when i try to break up she cannot loose me and wants to go forward dating, seems like we are just afraid to put a name on a thing, are those fears something resolvable or is it that she doesn't like me enough?

If your rental is illegal but you didn’t know it was illegal were you eligible for covid relief rent?
I moved into a place that ended up being an illegal granny flat. After moving in I asked about a copy of the lease and the acquaintance who moved me in as a friend stated they don’t give leases out so if someone sues they can say they don’t live there. I began making digital payments for a record. After a a couple years I was talked into the next door unit stating they could connect the two. It was too expensive so I asked for a rent reduction which $100 was offered. They said a few months later they weren’t going to connect the two because when I move they would have to figure out how to unconnect the two. I realized I couldn’t afford the second unit because I was taking on debt. They said I had to rent them both because my truck was parked in front of the unit. So much debt later covid happened. I worked as long as I could but eventually needed the covid rent relief. They told me the building unit didn’t qualify and blew me off. Then towards the end of the month every month they kept asking for the rent. They were already claiming the address for covid rent relief for themselves even though I was the only one living in the building renting two units.
They know I know but it is unspoken. They asked me to move to get rid of the grievance and move on from their actions. Now my perfect credit built up since homelessness is ruined and I can’t qualify for a legit rental to get away from these people to seek legal assistance.
From my understanding rent relief was about the person not a building unit.
The landlord said he won’t do anything about nuisances like door seals or thin ceiling noise till after I move so the future doesn’t look bright staying.

So for context my partner and I have been together for 4 years, and living together for 2. Our birthdays are a day apart, and so we celebrate our birthdays together. He has been wanting an electric drum set for the better part of a year, he was involved in a drumline for the majority of his childhood.
I’ve been planning and saving up for months to buy this drum for his birthday coming up, and then to decorate a little around the house and make a cute little cake or something. I know he would be over the moon about it.
My dilemma, though, is that recently these past couple of months he’s been REALLY passionate about photography, he’s always taken really nice pictures and I’d love to see him further pursue this possible passion. So he’s been researching cameras and threw out a name of one he’s been researching, so now I’m torn between which gift to get him lol 😅
TL;DR Torn between getting my partner drum set or camera for his birthday

So, I've read a lot of theories about this ending, including the director's opinion, etc. I think the best explanation is probably that it was all in Ray's head, but none of the theories I've read mention the theory I came up with while watching:
It's all real, except the end of the world, and Ray is the one behind it all.
Starting right off the bat we can extrapolate that they had no one other than each other that they cared enough about to keep safe. Truthfully I think the whole movie can be explained as a brainchild of one of those "So, if you're locked in a bunker and you can only take one person" types of questions, lol, and it's just ones guys defense of why he would take his best buddy, Mr. President, and how no, that doesn't make him gay.
In one of the very first scenes Billy is reading a book, stocked by Ray, that depicts a homoerotic encounter saucy enough that Billy confesses to having masturbated to it without realizing it was two guys. Ray had a limited number of books to stock for the end of the world, knowing he was going to be sharing this bunker with his best, male friend who is also straight. And he chose that book, and didn't tell Billy what he was reading and then he's like "Oh, would you like some help on that, it can be a little hard..." And the obvious homoeroticism just goes on, like an HP fanfic about Ron and Harry if one of them was a scientist instead of a wizard, they of course have to get started on the obligatory "I can hear you wanking" discussion right before they find the dead fish.
So there's tons of evidence that Ray was already harboring a secret romance for Billy, but what makes me think Ray is behind it all is the gaslighting. Whenever they discuss why this must be happening, specifically the sex change, Ray always turns around any suspicions that Billy has by implying Billy must have done something, even though if one of them had somehow turned the other one into a girl, the logical assumption would be science-bro, not politics-bro. But Billy is really insecure and believes that he's a total fuckup, so this immediately shuts him down and stops him from questioning anything, even though the most likely answer to the questions like "why is this happening to me and not you" is because Ray is making it happen.
So let's go a bit deeper, about how willing Ray is to use Billy's insecurity against him. He teases him about it from the beginning, when the audience doesn't really realize what he's doing. If Billy was the cause of the end of the world, Ray is handling it remarkably well, right? Except when it suits him to bring it up and make Billy feel insecure. He doesn't really appear to blame Billy, just to want to hold it over his head.
We have the background with Ray always "protecting" Billy, but also using his knowledge to control and have power over Billy.
So one line that really stuck out at me was after the storm, Billy was talking about how there might be other bunkers, other people might be pregnant, and Ray snaps at him to be realistic, but doesn't actually make any counter claims about the "storm" clearing up and it possibly being safe to go outside.
My theories are:
A. It is safe to go outside and always has been, and the "storm" is just tearing up whatever external layers Ray used to dark out the dome. Ray brought Billy in here letting him think it was the end of the world, and has been experimenting on him, more or less because Ray has always been in love with Billy but can't face that about himself, and so needs to change Billy.
B. It is safe to go outside, but Ray is upset about this because he knows what he's built with Billy is special and now it's going to be different. When they were the last two people on Earth and no one knew what was happening, sure, Billy was there for him. Now that there are going to be other people, will Ray still choose to be with a man, even a man with female parts? How will Billy feel about it? This theory comes from the question Billy has "what if there are other pregnant people", and Ray realizing there's no way in hell there are and that no one will accept Billy. Also Billy's own body image, his own discussions about how he still feels like a man, and their ongoing metaphorical discussion about which one of them is the top or bottom, man or woman in the relationship. So the final scene is Ray looking through the dome, seeing the sky clearing, and then seeing Billy, so happy and pregnant and miraculous, and Ray is crying because the "safety" is over.
Just, on another note, I found the scene where they discuss Billy getting his period as lame. I liked that he kept it private, but when he said it was "powerful", idk, it made me roll my eyes (as a cis woman). It's the kind of weird take you'd expect from someone who never had a period and was trying to figure out what it felt like, but doesn't really reflect the reality of the what menstruation feels like, and it disappointed me, idk, just fyi most of us don't get our periods and think like "Ah, yes, a surge in my power" it's just like... cramps and juices, dudes. You've had a hammy, just like. Picture a hammy all over your abs and thighs and back, and then you're just leaking blood. When people start glorifying periods it just feels fetishistic, like, glorifying taking a poop lmao. "How did that feel?" "Ah, so powerful, I really, really felt like a man when I birthed that 3lb turd straight into the toilet, what a magical experience."

Here's some context: My bf (28M) and I (28F) have been good friends since we were 14. We always cared for each other but never had a chance to be together until adulthood. We have been together for 3 years after reconnecting. I just gave birth to our first and only baby a month ago and I'm still recovering from a traumatic emergency c-section and grieving the recent and sudden loss of my mother and horrific sudden losses of my two best friends.
In the past I have told him I would be okay with bringing in a second woman for fun (I'm bisexual) as I do miss the intimacy of a woman sometimes, but only if we talked about it beforehand, there is no going behind each other's backs and it couldn't be someone we knew from before. And this should go without saying but nothing can happen until I'm physically and emotionally healed from having our child, as well as having had to come off all my anti depressants and anti psychotic meds cold turkey. I am nursing so I'm choosing to stay off things for now. It's just been really hard. And I'm still in a ton of physical pain and discomfort. My self esteem is the lowest its ever been.
Well, about a week ago he came right out and told me he has been messaging with his ex. The one that really screwed him over some years ago and his last serious relationship before me. She has two children that he had a hand in helping raise…
He said they have put their past behind them and that he's forgiven her and they were just catching up, but that he was curious if I would ever be interested in having her come down for some no strings attached fun. He said he asked because he was familiar with her and somehow he thought that would make it easier for me or something…
He said he's told her about me, our life and that it wouldn't be serious. But obviously I said I didn't think I would be comfortable with that and I thanked him for being honest with me. I also asked if they have flirted and he said no.
Well, I know this is wrong but earlier tonight his phone was open and I had the sudden feeling like I needed to look at their messages.
What I found made me sick to my stomach.
Not only did he initiate the conversation but he's said some pretty intimate things to her, like how he's missed her. They've exchanged at least two nudes (that I know of)
but worst of all he sent her intimate pictures of he and I…
and all of this happened while I was heavily pregnant! They apparently also talked on FB Messenger but I didn't look… I'm afraid to. She asked if I “knew yet”.
He has always treated me with such love and respect. Had my back and taken incredibly good care of me since day 1. He is my best friend… He is an amazing father.
(TW) He saw me come out of a seriously abusive, painful relationship where my ex committed suicide when I left after years of abuse. I only bring that up to convey just how much we've been through in such a short time.
We have always been honest with each other up until this. I don't understand… Why is he lying, especially if he brought it up in the first place? He knows he could have just been honest when I asked. I've never given him a reason to lie or feel like he can't talk to me about anything. I'm heartbroken, and PISSED. he knows me self esteem is in the gutter right now. How could he do this? With HER?
Even if I wanted to get away for a bit I have no family or friends to go to. He's literally all I have and I could never separate him from our daughter. We really love each other…
What do I do? I can't keep this bottled up, but I also don't want to ambush him. Do I ask him straight up if I can see the messages? I feel like asking a vague question may just get another bullshit answer. Please help...

I had social anxiety up until 4 years ago due to bullying and body image issues. I had a comfortable upbringing, which was rather sheltered. I’m a single child so my parents were and are overprotective. For some reason I don’t feel happiness easily, my default settings seem anger, broodiness, doubt towards and myself.
I have always found it difficult to associate with people, what they feel. For example about 6 years ago my friend showed me a new bracelet she bought expecting me to give a reaction. I just said “oh”, then she had to tell me that I was supposed to say it looks pretty or something in such a situation.
Whatever empathy I’ve learned has been over the past 3 years that too because I was forced to do so when someone I considered my only friend up and left because of my own sabotaging behaviour. I have made a few friends since then, my social life is better but I still feel this sense of disconnect with everything. My internship in medicine opened my eyes to the world and other’s suffering but even now I have to put a lot of effort to communicate and make others comfortable. I feel utterly exhausted later.
Now that I think back to my childhood I remember the good and the bad. My mother was extremely unhappy with her life, my father though good on paper is not good at showing affection. She halted her career progression to appease my father and grandmother , to take care of me. Her career is stagnant though she’s extremely intelligent.
My mother used to say things like “Don’t try to talk, you won’t know what to speak about. I know I can’t expect much from you. I’m disappointed in you, you are not fun to talk to.” All of this inspite of me being an obedient child, who was always appreciated at school for academics. Up until 10 years of age she used to help me study and hit me when I used to do something wrong. It also didn’t help that my parents fought a lot, it didn’t set a good example as to how I should communicate with others.As a result I didn’t communicate unless absolutely necessary at home up until 3 years ago.
My mother used to be affectionate at other times and really strived to make me nice meals and take me on vacations. My father too is very protective of me. I feel like I’m recalling the past because my mother recently asked me not to wear a particular set of clothes again while exercising because someone had commented on me being fat while wearing it. I don’t like that she wants me to take into consideration a stranger’s unsolicited opinion. Mind you I always dress conservatively, mostly in loose fitting clothes. She still says some mean things like “You are stupid”. I literally have to scream to get her attention.To top it all off she still says things like “Why can’t you be happy, you have everything in life “. I really want to move away for residency.
I feel like crying if I think of all this, I keep praying to God to make me feel different. To make me feel like a real human being and not a shell or some kind of android learning to self programme emotions. I was recently watching kimono mom videos and was crying seeing the kind of gentle parenting some children are afforded. I really wish to be a more gentle, happy, fulfilled person.

This will be a longer story, but I feel like sharing it because of how much this band has resonated with me lately.
So I attended high school between 2010 and 2014 and I distinctly remembered chatting with a metalhead friend over Facebook messenger about recent metal bands I should check out.
Up to that point, most of the metal I’ve listened to have been classic metal like Black Sabbath and thrash metal like Metallica and Megadeth. The only other metal band I’ve throughly enjoyed was Tool.
I’m generally not a fan of metal bands with a lot of dirty vocals, but I wanted to be open minded and expand my musical palette.
The friend in question recommended me Strawberry Swisher, Part 2 and was immediately impressed. We chatted about them for a bit and I listened to DBM and pretty much stuck with that album for a while since I really enjoyed the intricate instrumentation and the dynamics between the dirty and clean vocals.
After high school though, I pretty much went on my own in terms of finding music and listened to nothing but Rock music - and all of the sub genres within - as well as jazz, hip-hop, folk and indie music. I occasionally dipped my toes back into Metal, mostly Tool and the other metal bands I’ve mentioned, and slowly got into other heavier bands like At The Drive-In, Lighting Bolt, Death Grips, and Atari Teenage Riot (all of whom I still love.)
Two years ago, I got heavily (and still am) into jam bands and have been obsessed with them to this day. But at a certain point, I wanted to take a break from the feel good, funky vibes and wanted to get back into metal; however, I didn’t want to go back to the usual bands I’ve listened to in the past and wanted to find something new.
Then this year, I started supporting this webcartoon called “Ratbasterdz,” (a show I strongly recommended to everyone here), on Patreon which has a metalcore heavy soundtrack that clicked with me even though I’m not the biggest fan of that sub-genre.
Since I was supporting the show on Patreon, I have access to their discord server and started chatting with them about different music. I eventually asked for recommendations of “progressive metalcore” groups as I really champion heavier bands that have strong musicianship.
Three of the recommendations were From Autumn to Ashes, Bring Me The Horizon, and (finally) Dance Gavin Dance. I let out a big “oh shit!” when I saw that name as I’ve completely forgotten about them for so long and, somehow, never bothered to re-listen to them.
Listening to DBD and Happiness again filled me with not just nostalgia, but a newfound appreciation of the band and I couldn’t help but feel like an idiot for not giving them another chance and missing out on seeing them live during the 2000’s and 2010’s.
While I haven’t listened to all of their albums, I’m slowly making my way through them and can’t help but love their sound, their songwriting, and their passionate performances.
Welp…that’s my boring story. In a nutshell DGD rules and I’m glad I dove back into them.
Thanks for reading!

Posting as I am reflecting that I've been too hard on myself, and posit that others are too. Not looking for advice really, I guess commiseration?
​
Today I've relied almost entirely on pre-pumped milk, extended with formula (in roughly a 2/3rds milk, 1/3 formula mix). And my anxiety is SO down, I'm sipping a glass of wine, baby napping easily in his carrier...I feel like I can breathe! Why is it so HARD to let myself have a break like this??
I began my BF journey thinking 'I'll do it at least 3 mo, and aspire to 6', but the more I read the more I learned the health benefits, and once I actually had the baby, I saw for myself how challenging it can be (or at least feel) to build and maintain supply. Soon I was caught up in a world of stressful cluster feeding, pumping in off moments, sudden appearance of a slacker boob, etc. By chance, a friend without children was wrongly delivered a sample of formula, so I had 2 sample formula cans kicking around that I mostly ignored...I felt like the formula was taunting me, and scorned it as inferior. A failure of my supply!
Anyways, my baby boy is only 9 wks now and the past week he's been cluster feeding during the day (probably a result of his sleep becoming more consolidated). This cluster feeding was causing LO to get really upset from around 3pm - 7pm, where he'd be crying too much to latch, and it's not always clear if the issue is intestinal, him being over-tired (he doesn't always nap well), or him being hungry. I'd get just as frustrated as him, and have many moments of having to put the baby down and leave the room. Which...I never thought would be me, but there I was. And today we had to go to the US embassy (I live abroad) to register his birth, with an appt too early to do a full feed for assuming his usual sleep pattern, so I knew I needed at least 6oz bottle ready for us, to feed on the bus (he's a greedy bottle eater!) if I wanted him in a good mood for the embassy. I hadn't pumped enough overnight, so had no choice but to supplement with formula.
​
After that spritely start to the morning, I had less inhibition supplementing the rest of the day. And thus it's now with my break, and a glass of wine XD, I finally see what about his afternoon feeding situation was getting me so frustrated/angry. When he's too upset to latch, I had always been self aware enough to realize that my irritation stemmed from (a) I don't know what too do, and (b) I feel on some subliminal level like he's rejecting my breast/milk, and because that milk takes so much effort, it really triggers something. But you can 'known' a thing, and not 'feel' a thing. Today in the same situation I just giving him 'fortified' breast milk... and... a fraction of the stress. It was SO clear just how much (b) was really getting to me. I'd already figured out (a) after the first few days--I could usually calm him down eventually by humming on a yoga ball holding him, taking him outside, start the 'latch' on the yoga ball...but it was stressful and I was already frustrated by then. And concerned about 'my supply'. He's in a velcro stage (only naps in a carrier during day) so it's hard to get time to pump, and I would tell myself that I needed to persist. That if I just caved and gave him bottle he'd start to have 'bottle preference', and get even worse at latching, and my supply would fail and... and... the world would end.
But... so what? Yes, I might need to switch to pumping--have prepumped milk ready for him and pump more while I feed him bottle. Yes I might have to use formula. Yes that's demoralizing on some animal level. But mental health is important. Feeling mad at my baby is bad. So I'm revising my goals:
- aspire to not giving the baby formula ALONE as opposed to mixed with breast milk (bc my parents lectured me that as an infant I started to prefer formula once I tasted it alone) - put effort into maintaining supply through 3 mo (ie, pump when I can) - continue BF in some capacity through 6mo, and beyond. It's super handy when out and about, in restaurants, etc, and still conveys antibodies! But it's 'ok' if I supplement more as i go along, if I'm stressed out!

From the past two years.Im feeling down,alone. But now,it's even worse. Even though I have a very small group of good friends that (probably) do care about me,I feel like I'm bothering them and just wasting their time. I got two loyal friends who I got most trust in. Im scared to vent to them because I feel like I will just waste their time.I used to vent to one of my friends but they certainly were not too happy about me venting everyday,since I was pathetic almost every day.its not their fault since they are dealing with shit too. I just don't feel like I deserve friends.i just suck at everything.So yesterday,result aya (im in 10th).and I scored decent (I think? I got 91.2%) too.but I don't feel so good about it.like you know the things I should feel after getting a decent result?I was thinking if I got a good result,the result day would be one of the best days I will ever have,but no it wasn't.i mean it was certainly a good day since I got to meet many of my friends and got a decent result too.but still I feel alone even after hanging out with them. it's just I feel like I'm the problem,the liability that my friends have to bear with.i really feel like I got no one except those two people and I'm bothering even them due to my pathetic personality.i feel like a disappointment to everyone.im not a good friend,not a good son either,i am not good in comforting,I do not have a good physique and posture, ( I'm working on that),i just am not a very fun person to be around with.so some of my friends just really don't like my closest friend (a really kind and amazing girl who I sided with when they fucking slut shamed her because of that sigma bs and that she rejected one of the guys),due to which a guy,he backbitches about me and her way too often.I got to know that yesterday,it's just something I remembered while writing this.I never did that or will do that to anyone.I just felt bad cause I was always kind to everyone and he never said anything like that on my face and I don't feel too good hearing bad things about my closest friend.I feel like ending my life sometimes.i don't know why I am even making this post,im really sorry for writing this if anyone is somehow offended by how i am or the choices I made.